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dinbuckyenthusiasts · 2 years

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Bucky Barnes Shopping HCs

Grocery shopping:

Bucky going grocery shopping would be both funny and sad. Food would be more of a basic thing to him, just a means to survive, until you opened him up more to the idea of learning to cook different comfort foods. No matter what some ff writers say, I firmly believe that because of the era he grew up in/environment he was kept in, he doesn’t know how to cook. He would’ve been the kind of boy to sit and watch his mom cook, but never would’ve joined in. Now that he has freedom, I can see him following your advice and would try to recreate old recipes his mom used to make for him. That would be a never-ending project for him and he would definitely ask both you and Sam to help him taste test. It would take him a long time to figure out cooking, like what kind of spices to use, different types of cuisine, etc. Bucky would definitely go to smaller grocery stores, like farmers markets, because that’s what would feel the most natural to him, the most comfortable. I am also a strong believer that Bucky hates jello with a passion. I don’t know why but it’s just not him.

Clothes shopping:

Bucky going clothes shopping alone and going clothes shopping with you would be two VERY different things. When Bucky first went clothes shopping alone (after hydra/shield yk…) he would’ve been SO overwhelmed by the choices. It was a lifetime ago that he had the opportunity to choose so he wouldn’t know what to get. He wouldn’t really have a sense of style either and would end up quickly buying the most generic clothes (henleys, tees, etc.) so he could blend in with the crowd easily. But around the time TFATWS took place, he would start to get back out into the world, and would definitely take shopping as something a bit more significant. It’s still definitely not his favourite activity, but he’s slowly learning to incorporate his own style/what he enjoys (leather jacket, TIGHT tee shirts).

If he went shopping with you, he would enjoy it A LOT more. He’d love watching you try things on and would be convinced that you’d have to get every single outfit. Alone, he probably wouldn’t try this but with you, he would check out the food court and get something to eat. He’d really like the food court because of all the types of food they have available from different cultures. All in all, he would purely enjoy having people around and not needing to be anxious. He would love walking around with you and having a “normal” experience. That would mean the world to him.

Gift shopping:

The holidays would be such a stressful time for Bucky because he would not like gift shopping. It’s not that he doesn’t like giving gifts, it’s that the shopping, picking, and planning itself is so exhausting. He would have no idea what to get for his loved ones. He’s definitely more of a people pleaser so he wants to get something that people will use and enjoy, no matter the price. In the end, he would ponder over his options for an absurd amount of time and then get something more last minute. He wouldn’t expect the person to like the gift and would downplay it so much, but the receiver would love it. He’d be in disbelief for a while but then would be so happy that he got a gift that someone loved.

Car shopping:

Bucky going car shopping would be an ordeal. This man just wants a nice, comfortable method of transportation but of course it’s not that easy. He would end up going to a car shop that was around back in the day, something like Chevrolet but would be so confused at all the new different kinds of cars there are. He doesn’t really understand why some people are obsessed with cars, to him it’s just a thing that gets you places (it’s not like it flies). He would almost give up on the idea of buying a car, but then he’d happen to walk past an older garage shop and see a few older vehicles. He would be pleased at the lack of confusing language and would see an older motorcycle and would just buy it immediately. The owner of the shop would be so confused at a simple walk-in purchase but Bucky would be so happy that this mission of his was over.

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kayvsworld · 5 months

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a cozy grumpy bucky for @a-bit-of-owlish-fun ! thanks for commissioning me :)

#he has the snacks from his apartment in romania if u even CARE #he's a cozy white wolf. drawing this healed me thanks he's so cute im going to squish him #also: feels weird to write his name out normally im gonna say it. he's bonky to me #bucky barnes #marvel art #mine

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annafacose · 7 months

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After more than two years of total silence, here I'm again.

It has been a very tough time for my mental health and I almost completely stopped drawing. This is one of the few pieces I was able to do in the last years and... it's quite indicative of the state of mind I was in xD

Thankfully it's so much better now and I'm starting to enjoy drawing again <3

(Pss… If you want to follow me also on patreon you will find many - happier and spicy - new drawings!)

#mcu #bucky barnes #my art #my fanart #comfort character #mental health #recovery #healing journey

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last-herondale · 1 month

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Almost Part 8

Bucky Barnes x Femreader!

Warnings: none

Angst, heartbreak, healing

AN: this story is close to my heart. This whole series. I’ll go into more detail perhaps once it’s done.

Enjoy ❤️

Months had passed. The weather here in the islands was warm and tropical. You had always loved the beach. Watching the waves crash against the sand, feeling the warm beams of sun hit your face as you relaxed in a beach chair. Tony had several island houses, some remote, some really, really remote, and then there was the one you had chosen, which was completely isolated away from the rest of the world.

Tony didn’t ask questions when you came to him that early morning. You only told him that you needed to get away. Somewhere no one could find you. Somewhere you could be alone. He gave you an access card, an address, and sent you on your way in one of his private jets. The vacation house was huge, way too big for one single person, but you were not going to complain.

You spent the first few weeks in bed. Your body and soul felt absolutely exhausted. Guilt riddled your chest. You hated leaving your team like that. No explanation, no word at all. It wasn’t fair to the people who you saw as your family. But there wasn’t time to write every single one of them a note. You just left one for Steve and Nat. You left the note with Tony to give to Nat, but you left the note for Steve on your dresser.

It was short, but it was all you could muster before you chickened out. It hurt too much. Feeling like you used Steve, fighting with Bucky, and lying to yourself and everyone else that you are okay. There seemed to be very limited options as to what you could do about it without messing everything you built up. Without destroying the whole team itself, over something as trivial as your heart.

It felt like you were dying. Physically and spiritually. You took sleeping pills just to shut out everything racking in your brain. You hardly ate, even though Tony made sure to send groceries every week. No one had come to check up on you, so you assumed that Tony had made good on his promise to keep your whereabouts secret. It was strange to feel so conflicted. To want nothing more than to be alone, but also want someone to talk to.

So you opted for writing. Tony had plenty of empty journals in the house, some filled with new suit ideas or other inventions, but you found one that looked like it wouldn’t be missed and began writing. It helped. Writing down anything and everything you had been feeling when you felt it. It took a few weeks, but you finally decided to leave the house. You began taking walks, writing on the beach, reading the various books that Tony had. It was nice. It was starting to feel like a vacation.

You created a routine. You woke up early in the mornings on the weekdays, making sure to go on a long walk around the island before the sun rose. Then whenever you were ready, you went back to the house and made yourself something to eat. Sometimes it was breakfast, most times it was lunch by the time you returned. You spent your afternoons either reading or writing or sleeping. It was a bit boring and mundane, but it felt like it was exactly what you needed.

The only thing that bothered you was the zero contact. You did miss your friends. At the mark of one month of your isolation, you decided to write to Nat. You left a note for Tony, asking that he still not give out your whereabouts, but you trusted him enough to write a few letters with Nat. Nat seemed understanding, if not a bit disappointed you hadn’t gone to her first before leaving. She didn’t say anything about Steve or Bucky, although you were very careful not to ask or even hint that you wanted to know. Even though you did. Desperately.

You started writing to her every week. You thought maybe one day she would get fed up with you avoiding everything, but all Nat ever said at the end of her letters were:

“I love you. Just be careful, okay? I’ll always be here for you if you need me.”

It was everything to have her support, and Tonys. You felt as if you were finally getting better. You were finally taking care of your mental health and your feelings, rather than worry about everyone else. It was strange. It felt selfish. But you realized it was needed.

After two months, you decided you needed somewhere a bit more social to be. Tony was happy to oblige, and he and Pepper came to help you get settled into your new living space in Maui. It was smaller than the first house, much to your appreciation. Pepper and you talked for a bit, and it was nice to open up to her. She often seemed so set apart from the chaos of the tower life, so she offered her unbiased opinion.

Tony’s aim was to help you have fun again. Before he and Pepper left, he showed you his favorite spots, and ensured that the owners would take care of you, if you ever decided to enter their establishment. It was nice to be out and social again. Even just being out to dinner with the two of them livened your spirits up more than you thought it would.

That’s when you decided that it was time. You told Tony before he left, that he could share your whereabouts with the team. He had just given you a look of uncertainty, but then shrugged. You weren’t sure if he would follow through, but then Pepper put her hand on your shoulder and you knew she would take care of it.

The local city in Maui was wonderful. It wasn’t full of tourists, but it was bustling full of the locals. They were kind, and very pleasant to be around. Even if you didn’t talk to them much, it was nice to be back around people. You took up a small job, delivering merchandise for one of Tony’s recommended shops. You knew it was a small task, certainly not up to what you were capable of doing, but it kept you busy.

You still wrote daily, keeping up with your journal that was now full. Tony had gifted you a whole set, for however long you wanted to stay. You considered going home. Several times during your trip. The memories of what you left behind… who you left behind. It caused you too much pain.

The pain was ebbing, ever so slowly. The realignment, the refocusing your attention back to yourself made it easier. You realized that you deserved to put yourself first. That you needed to love yourself before you could love anyone. And so these long months have been your love letter to yourself. You followed your heart. Did what you wanted. You were honest with yourself and your needs. Things were finally becoming okay.

You felt like it was finally okay… it was finally acceptable to just be you.

A few people sent their regards. A few letters came in for you, one from Sam, Wanda, and even Scott. Nat visited you the next week Tony left. It was nice to be with her again and be able to cry and hug her. It was nice to converse and be around the people you loved. People that you had neglected in your mess. It made you feel whole again… well almost.

You missed them. Although it was hard to say their names still, you missed them both. You missed them terribly.

And like always, it seemed that the universe had a great sense of humor when it came to you. You were sorting through the mail, a normal routine you did once a week. The letters were from the usual suspects, but one name made your heart stop.

You knew it would happen. Maybe even hoped it would happen. And now it seemed that the time had finally come.

#fem reader #reader x marvel #marvel fanfic club #marvel #bucky x you #james bucky buchanan barnes #bucky fic #bucky x reader #fan fic author #healing #angst prompt #angst #alone

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cha0s-incarnated · 1 year

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Rewatching Captain America: The Winter Soldier just reminds me how much potential Marvel WASTED by not making Steve and Bucky a thing, like c'mon you make one of the most romantic ships of the Goddamn series, AND YOU THROW IT ALL AWAY?? FOR WHAT?? A LACKLUSTER ENDING IN ENDGAME?? BOOOOOOOOOO

#this is why i need fanfiction to survive #so that i may heal my poor poor soul #Steve Rogers #bucky barnes #stucky #stevebucky #captain america: the winter soldier #catws

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mandyyvibes · 4 months

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people talk about the super soldier healing factor really casually and the intrinsic body horror of literally wiping away blood only to watch the flesh underneath knitting itself back together, forming scabs and scars and nothing at all in a matter of minutes or hours, is kind of horrifying? or like imagine watching a bruise go from light green to deep purple to sickly yellow before your eyes? gross! 🤠

#tw injury #tw body horror #i’m saying this is a positive way btw. give me the ‘god what have they done to you’ moments in ww2 as bucky watches steve’s cuts heal in #real time #give me GOD WJAT HAVE THEY DONE TO ME as the same thing happens to him #marvel #steve rogers #bucky barnes #stucky #captain america #winter soldier

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yourtearsaremyink · 1 month

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It's Just This Once

Chapter 1

Hey everyone! This is my first post. This work is finished but I will be uploading the chapters weekly. (I don't really know how Tumblr works so if y'all have suggestions or tips let me know)

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Warnings: Not many. Bucky and his PTSD, my life choices to write this, nightmares, Bucky's regret and self hatred. Idk. There's not even language in this thing its mostly fluff.

Summary: Y/N is an Avenger, she has healing powers and uses them to patch up the rest of the team. Bucky never asks her to use her healing powers on him, except once.

Chapter Word Count: 1,912

Chapter 1: Take the Pain Away

Y/N was working in her little corner of the medical wing of the newly built Avengers Compound. All was right in her little world, well as right as her world could be since reappearing after a five year absence.

Everyone was trying their hardest to go back to normal but adapting to a life without Steve, Tony, and Natasha was far from it. Shortly before Tony and Steve's fallout, Y/N was recruited by Fury to join the Avengers Initiative. He had somehow figured out she was an enhanced and convinced her to join the team. She had hid her abilities so well in the past she had no idea how a man she had never met before found out about them. Y/N had the extraordinary ability to heal others, it had taken an insane amount of time, energy, and focus to master her powers. With the help of Wanda she had also been able to unlock another talent. She had intuition that was insanely on point so she could guide her teammates on their missions. Natasha had taught her some martial arts moves and Steve taught her how to protect herself in a fight. Y/N soon became part of the family and finally found a place where she belonged, but after a few billion people came back from nothingness, her family seemed to narrow down. She had fought in the battle against Thanos and tried, had really tried, to heal Tony with her powers but in the end it wasn't enough. She couldn't help but feel a little responsible for his death. When the battle was over and Steve left to be with the love of his life, he left so many friends behind. If Y/N couldn't heal Tony's physical wounds, maybe she could heal the emotional wounds he and Steve left behind.

Shortly after the battle she became close with the remaining Avengers. She helped guide Sam on missions as the new Captain America, she comforted Wanda after her little outburst in Westview, she even got to know Bucky a bit more. Sam had convinced him to live at the new Compound with him instead of being alone in an old apartment in Brooklyn. Every so often Sam and Bucky would limp into the med bay in need of healing. She had healed Sam several times and Wanda a few but never Bucky. He always said she shouldn't waist her energy on him, and she always replied with, "It's no trouble at all, it doesn't take that much energy." Bucky would brush it off and say his advanced healing would take care of his injuries in no time. She never really pushed it, considering what he's been through with people messing with his body, it didn't surprise her when he didn't want to be helped.

Today was nothing unusual when Sam came into the med bay with an arm around Bucky and the other around his side. Y/N hopped up from the seat at her desk and began walking to the two men.

"What did you do this time?"

"This idiot took a bullet for me." Bucky spoke up as he helped Sam into a bed.

"Hey don't be mad at me for saving your life." Sam snapped back. He was taking off part of his uniform so Y/N could assess the injury properly.

"I have better healing than you, I would have been just fine." Bucky countered.

"I'll be fine! I have the best healer in the world right here, right doc?" Sam shot a quick smirk at Y/N as she started to heal him. A light purple glow emitted from her hands as she closed the wound on Sam's torso.

"Just because I can heal you in seconds doesn't mean you can be reckless."

Sam's smirk faded as Bucky gave a short "Ha" in victory. Y/N noticed Bucky was holding his left arm with his right and had a few bruises on his face.

"I could always heal you too Bucky if you need it."

"It's fine doll, these bruises will be gone in a couple hours." He said as he gestured to his face. Y/N turned her attention back to Sam as she finished up her work.

"All done." She said as she removed her hands. "Go clean up, Wanda and I are making dinner soon."

She grabbed a cloth and wiped some of the blood off her hands.

"You're the best doc. " Sam gave her a quick hug and headed out with Bucky. As they left she saw how tight the muscles in Bucky's were. With all of the experience Y/N had with healing people, she was able to see how much he was hurting. It could just be the stress of the mission so she didn't think much of it.

Later that evening while Y/N was cooking with Wanda, she once again noticed Bucky. At this point she couldn't tell if it was just stress or flat out pain. Sam was tapping away at his laptop sending a report on the mission to Fury. He didn't seem to notice the tight expression Bucky was wearing. Bucky was absentmindedly rubbing his left shoulder where metal met flesh, he looked exhausted.

"You good Buck?"

He glanced up at her removing his hand from his shoulder and said,

"Yeah, I'm fine. " with a half hearted smile.

She hoped that a warm meal would help. Y/N loved to cook, especially with Wanda, she loved seeing people's faces when they ate the food she made. Pretty much everyone else was away from the compound so it was just the four of them. Wanda had suggested they make soup since Autumn came out of nowhere and settled in New York. They set the table and listened to Sam talk about the mission he and Bucky had just endured. Bucky let Sam do all the talking for once and kept quite happily enjoying the warm food. The creases in his features slowly melted away as he finished the soup. Once the story was finished and the dining room was cleaned up, everyone said their goodnights and started off to their rooms, all expect Y/N.

"You're not going to sleep?" Wanda had asked when she saw Y/N going towards the elevator instead of her room.

"I have some work left to finish since I was so rudely interrupted earlier." She had turned her head to Sam with a smile.

"Hey don't come at me." He said with his hands up in a surrendering gesture as he walked to his room.

She gave a small laugh, "Goodnight guys."

Y/N headed down to her lab and picked up where she left off. She was running some lab work on some blood samples when she heard thunder shake the building. It startled her enough for her to nearly drop her test tube. Soon after she heard rain begin to pound on the walls of the Compound. She glanced at the clock as it struck 1:00 am.

"Just a little longer." She whispered as she resumed her work.

Bucky was sitting in his bed when he heard Thunder boom outside his window. He hadn't slept since coming to his room, too stressed from the mission and in too much pain. He knew the rain was coming, he felt it in his bones, but that didn't make it any less unsettling. He truly felt like an old man knowing rain was coming by the way his prosthetic arm felt. The mission had caused a few unpleasant memories to resurface and that made his mind uneasy. All of that combined together resulted in a dull headache and an unbearable amount of phantom pain in his left arm. His shoulder was throbbing and it felt as if he was being stabbed by a hundred needles where his metal arm occupied where his flesh should be. His breathing was laboured and heavy, he was so close to a panic attack it wasn't even funny. The weather hadn't helped either, it made him feel cold and achey. He tried so hard to keep it together but the pain became too much. He needed relief and there was one person he could think of to help. He hated the idea of Y/N using her healing powers on him when she could use them for something much more valuable. He didn't want to inconvenience her with his pain but it was becoming agonizing. He sat and thought it over for a few more minutes when he finally caved and made his way down to her lab. He stood at the door and sighed,

"It's just this once."

Y/N was just about finished when she heard a small knock at the lab entrance. She got up and walked towards the door, she wasn't expecting to see Bucky when she opened it. He stood with his hand clutching his metal shoulder, his hair was unkempt and he had bags under his eyes.

"Hey, I thought you went to bed. Is everything okay?"

"Uh, not really. I hate to ask you this, especially this late, but-"

Suddenly thunder echoed through the lab and Bucky squeezed his eyes shut and his breath began to shake, using his hand to add more pressure to his shoulder.

"My shoulder hurts, and my arm too kinda." He looked down not wanting to meet her eyes.

"Like phantom pain?" She questioned

"Y-yeah, it feels like pins and needles. The vibranium feels heavy."

"Are you asking me to help you?" She asked in disbelief.

"I-if you don't want to that's fine I can manage."

"No, no come in, sit down."

She led him to one of the beds and guided his hand off his shoulder, eager to work on the one person she hadn't helped.

He winced in pain as he moved, his hand letting up the pressure it was omitting on his upper arm.

"Sorry," she stepped back for a second, "I need you to take off your shirt." In the dimly lit lab she could see him blush a little. "It'll be better if I have direct contact to the skin."

He complied, slowly and painfully taking off his blue Henley. She walked around to the side of the bed to begin.

"I'm just going to put my hands on your shoulder, okay?"

He gave a very tight nod and she began. Her hands danced across the mess of scar tissue where metal crept into his skin. She couldn't help but felt bad for what Hydra did to him. His breath hitched but his back slowly became more relaxed. She could feel his heart rate slowing and his breath even out.

"I'm halfway done, are you okay? " she was concerned. She had never been able to do this for Bucky before and didn't know how he'd react.

"Mhmm." he seemed content.

She stopped and moved to his front to place her hands on his collar bone. She tried not to make it too awkward by making eye contact but she glanced up anyway and met his blue eyes. They both quickly looked away and Y/N turned her attention back to his arm. She stopped when she felt she couldn't do anything more to help with the pain.

"Done, does that feel better?"

He immediately brought her in for a hug and whispered a quite,

"Thank you."

She hugged back happily,

"You're welcome."

It gets better I promise. It was originally a one shot but it evolved.

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buckysouvenir · 10 months

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unexpected losses

chapter 1 of healing hearts.

reblogs, likes and comments are always encouraged and highly appreciated! thank you ♡

⋆ series masterlist　　⋆ steve rogers masterlist

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

the avengers tower felt emptier than ever for y/n. the ache in her chest seemed to echo the emptiness of her surroundings. she had just broekn up with bucky barnes, the man she thought she'd spend her entire life with. the pain was overwhelming, and all she wanted was to find some solace.

she walked through the corridors with carried steps, tears pricking at the corners of her eyes, she nearly collided with natasha romanoff.

natasha's face softened when she saw y/n's tear-streaked cheeks. "y/n, are you okay?"

y/n's voice trembled as she tried to hold back her tears. "no, nat. i'm not."

natasha's arms wrapped around y/n in a comforting embrace. "i'm so sorry, y/n."

she let herself cry in natasha's arms. she had lost the person she loved, and it felt like her world was crashing down around her.

eventually, y/n pulled away slightly, her voice shaky. "i just need some time alone now, nat."

natasha nodded understandingly. "take all the time you need. i'll be here whenever you're ready."

y/n wiped her tears and managed a weak smile. "thanks."

a few weeks had passed, the emotional wounds were still fresh. y/n took comfort in her alone time and she's thankful all her friends were by her side for wherever needed.

it was long days of crying and trying to keep herself busy, training, movie nights, shopping, starting new hobbies (let's just say, learning to paint and crochet are not a good idea for a hobby when you're already feeling like the world is against you)

after all this time, she definitely felt sad, but in a different kind of way. there's much more thinking and reflecting on things now.

she had trusted bucky with her heart, and now it lay shattered. she found herself in a quiet table in corner, sitting alone with her thoughts, hot coffee in hand.

lost in her thoughts, y/n looked up, her heart clenching as she saw a familiar sight that she hadn't expected. bucky and natasha stood close, their faces inches apart. y/n's breath caught in her throat as she watched them share a lingering kiss.

the world seemed to turn upside down, and y/n's emotions took a sharp turn. she couldn't believe what she was seeing. Her best friend and the man she had loved were together, in a way that felt like a knife to her heart. her sadness turned into anger in the fastest way possible.

she got up from her table, knocking down her mug making a loud noise echo through the room, making the two of them notice her presence.

y/n started to walk away from both of them, only hearing the fast steps behind her, but she didn't dare to look back.

"please! PLEASE!" natasha begged as she reached y/n and grabbed her arm.

she stopped in her tracks to look at them with a mix of anger and sorrow on her face. she kept looking at both of them, waiting for a word. when it didn't come, she turned around again and started to walk away.

natasha "WAIT!"

y/n stopped again and turned to face her. "WHAT KIND OF FRIEND ARE YOU?"

bucky's and natasha's eyes were dripping from guilt. "i'm sorry" she said with a choked voice.

bucky stepped forward, his voice pleading, "y/n, please! we- we didn't plan for this to happen!"

y/n only shook her head in denial, as she closed her eyes and felt the tears stream down her face. "i- i- i thought we could still be friends. after everything, i thought i still deserved some consideration but apparently not."

she wiped away her tears, her voice firm. "i deserve better than this."

"i would've never done this to you!" she said, looking natasha in the eye.

she turned on her heel and walked away from them for the last time, not wanting to see any more of the painful scene. she walked away, her heart heavy with a new layer of hurt. she couldn't help but feel a profound sense of loss.

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sanguineterrain · 1 year

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"love is stored in the kitchen."

for my very dear best friend lavenderbucky. merry late christmas, i love you <3

(p.s: bucky made apple cake for steve)

#bucky barnes #stucky #bucky barnes fanart #bucky art #marvel #marvel fanart #mcu #mcu fanart #stucky art #healing bucky #recovering bucky

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nascenticity · 8 months

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i have seen a lot of headcanons (& fics!) about bucky doing crochet or knitting that i LOVE but i also need everyone to consider --

steve watching his mother doing irish crochet; maybe she even teaches him some simple things when he's sick and needs something to occupy him so he'll sit still and rest; its a creative outlet for sarah and that artistic streak is something she and steve share almost a century later, crochet comes back into fashion with millennials and gen-z, and steve looks up a youtube tutorial. he doesn't have many physical things left from his mom; but he can make some stuff that she would have loved and it helps him feel close to her.

#marvel #steve rogers #bucky barnes #stucky #ive been thinking about this a LOT lately #ive been looking at a lot of vintage crochet patterns lately and it had me thinking about sarah rogers and the fact that this would 100%#have been something she was exposed to/taught as a young girl. ofc as a single mother she wouldn't have had a lot of free time.#but making little things here and there as a hobby is far from out of the question #also since i hc steve as neurodivergent (adhd and possibly autistic) its entirely possible sarah was too #and crochet is just. such a good stim.#also lots and lots of headcanons about steve getting bored when he was sick #sitting in bed is BORING and im sure at least a few sketchbooks were filled that way #but maybe also a mother who is desperate to get her small child to calm down so his body can heal. will go “hey wanna see what i'm making?”#ik everyone has headcanons about bucky doing traditionally feminine stuff and sees steve as more traditionally masculine #bc that was gatekept from him bc of his disabilities #but let me have this

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kayvsworld · 7 months

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??? woke up to emails from ko-fi telling me a bunch of INCREDIBLY KIND folks have bought me ko-fis and also sent VERY cute tony stark refs for their commission requests u guys are the best???? i am crying thank u,

#I DID NOT EXPECT THIS. HEAD IN MY HANDS #i also didn't realize that like. having a fun thing that i can do that will feel like it's tangibly helping would ALSO be good. for me??#like oh!!!! you're paying me to DRAW BUCKY BARNES????? cool i'm getting smiley rdj gifs in my inbox im healed i'm gonna be ok #i can take a break from doom spiralling and obsessively checking apartment listings and online banking to INSTEAD. draw iron man. helpfully #kayvswords

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blondie20000 · 5 months

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Human - Bucky Barnes x Yelena Belova

They are weapons, but together, they feel human.

Bucky never thought he would have a moment like this ever again a moment where he would allow someone to touch him, strip off his layers, take control of the situation. Last time he was like that he was strapped down to a chair, his body, mind and soul being abused by HYDRA.

He takes a shaky breath as Yelena runs her hands over his body. She is slow and cautious. Bucky can sense she is wary, because like him Yelena Belova never thought she would experience something so mundane like this and now she is doing it now it is happening and she is lost, unsure of what to do because after all of this time, her whole life, she has learnt to kill. She has turned into a killing machine, and she didn't know anything else apart from death.

Another glide along his chest. Yelena's brows furrow and she bites her lip looking uncomfortable. She is used to direct orders, following someone's every command it is strange for her to now be the one to make the decisions.

Bucky can relate to that. Their minds have been controlled for so long it was hard to trust themselves sometimes.

Bucky still struggled to trust himself.

He reaches out with his arm, the same arm that has snapped many necks and beaten people until they are nothing but a bloody mess on the ground.

It rests on her cheek. She shivers. She knew exactly where that hand has been, the damage it has caused, but she didn't pull away like others would instead she remained where she was allowing him to touch her.

It is not the first time she has been in contact with death.

Bucky gives her a silent nod to convey he understands. He knows her feelings all too well.

"No rush." He assures her.

She blows out a sigh and nods back.

Yelena straightens up, rolls her shoulders and mentally counts herself in.

She can do this.

She wants this.

She wants him.

"No pressure." He adds. "We can stop anytime just say the word."

"Shut up!" She scowls at him. She then rolls her eyes. "Jeez were you like this with all your previous hook ups? Bore them to death with your mouth."

"No." He replies. "Because you are not a hook up." He smiles. "You are much more than that. Miss Belova."

Those words shouldn't affect her but it does. A blush creeps up on her cheeks. She then scoffs and shakes her head.

"So you want to kill me with your words? Slow death huh?" She tries to joke. "Wow I'm honored White Wolf I really am."

Bucky didn't reply.

Bucky knows she is only acting like this to cover her up vulnerability. For all the time Bucky has known her, Yelena puts up a front, a mask to hide away the pain and weakness. Others may have been fooled, but Bucky wasn't. He can see right through that mask because it is the same mask he wore day in and day out. When he looked at Yelena, it was like looking into a mirror. A reflection of trauma staring back at him.

Bucky wants to change the image, see something else in the mirror, wipe the trauma away, and replace it with good with light. If there is one person who deserved that, it was Yelena.

Yelena hesitates at first before leaning down and kissing his chest. A small kiss but it is a huge deal to them both. She then kissed him in another spot then another and another. Barnes closes his eyes as Yelena kissed every part of him. Her lips grazed his skin causing him to shiver. Soon her hands went to his face. She cups his cheeks and stares directly into his eyes.

It is like she is looking straight into his soul.

Did she see that mirror as well?

Did she want to smash that mirror to pieces and scream. Bucky wants to do that. He wishes he can just drop to his knees and scream as loud he could. Let out it all out. He might be in a better place than before but the memories are still there lingering in the back of his mind. No matter how much he washed his hands the blood wouldn't wash away.

He is a monster.

Most people would run from monsters but Yelena didn't. She has seen the ugliness, the darkness in him that even his friends couldn't bear to look at but Yelena never once judged him, she accepted him, all of him because she saw herself as a monster as well.

"Us monsters have got to stick together." She once told him trying to humor the situation but Bucky clung on to those words relieved that there is someone who understood him, who is exactly like him. It made him determined to help her.

And this made him more determined to help himself.

They continued to stare at each other watching each other's life flash across their eyes. Like a movie.

Bucky gently grasps one of her hands. He moves his head and brushes his lips against her knuckles.

She closes her eyes and sighs heavily.

He urges her to look at him.

She does.

He brushes his thumb across her lower lip. He wants to tell her how beautiful she truly is but he knows if he did she would likely send his ass straight out of the door. She wasn't one for compliments and cheesy chat up lines so Bucky decided to express his feelings through actions.

He silently asks for her permission.

She gives it to him.

Bucky leans forward and locks her lips with his. He kisses her slowly wanting her to feel comfortable in his presence. He kept it short until she asked him to kiss her again. He did. This time the kiss is more fierce, more passionate. Yelena soon responds when she started to become more confident.

She teases him with her tongue pushing inside and rolling it along with his. A ghost of a smile passed across her lips as she got a low moan out of him.

"Yelena." He breathes against her.

She cracked a grin as his breaths became shallow.

"You break easily." She said once she pulled away. "I'm shocked."

"Willingly." He replies. "For once I don't have to fight against it."

She knows what he meant by that. Choosing to not comment on it knowing Barnes wouldn't wish to speak anymore on the topic, Yelena sent a trail of kisses along his neck and rubs against his stubble. It tickled her. She then turns her focus to his metal arm, giving it her full attention.

This arm held a weight. A burden. A reminder of his days as The Winter Soldier. It will always be there to show what he lost and what he became.

Maybe it is time to change the image of his arm. A scar it is but rather convey it as pain, fear and death it should instead be a symbol of strength. Sergeant Barnes is here, alive. He fought through the programming and came back to them. The Winter Soldier is dead and the White Wolf rose. He should carry them scars with pride.

She kisses his arm. The cold metal making her shiver. She kisses it again and caresses it showing no fear towards him.

Bucky holds his breath as she tended to his arm what he always saw as a weapon.

"Wear it with pride Barnes." She spoke softly to him. "You got out. You are here to tell the tale."

You are here with me. She wanted to say but didn't.

His arm, one of his many scars.

Bucky thought the same for her. He viewed her scars in the same way. He wants her to be proud. She broke away from the Red Room and helped Natasha take them down.

"Same goes to you." He then said.

Yelena pauses and looks down. She didn't feel the same way. The guilt of what she did still consumed her. She didn't view her scars as heroic. They were instead a reminder that no matter how far she ran from it she will always be a Widow, a trained assassin, a killer.

She was no hero.

Bucky sighs and takes her hand.

They are proud of each other. If only they could feel that way about themselves.

He squeezes her hand asking if she is okay to continue this?

She abruptly pulls away and nods. She didn't need this to turn into a chic flick moment.

Deciding to move things forward Yelena orders him to open his legs. He does. Yelena positions herself above him. A gasp escapes her lips as she felt him go inside her.

The White Widow started off slow at first feeling overwhelmed by this new development between them then once she found her rhythm she started to pick up the pace. Bucky lifts his hips to meet her at each thrust. His hands hold her waist as he guides her through it.

"Fuck!" She swears out loud.

Bucky growls in response.

They keep going, pushing each other, pouring their emotions into this because here right now they are making history. Two weapons, beings who were brainwashed, controlled, moulded into killers, leaving bodies in their path are here making love, rebelling against their abusers and embracing their freedom.

They kissed each other. Tears slip from their eyes as they showed how much this meant to them. How much they wanted each other. Needed each other.

Yelena shakes, the fire forms at the bottom of her belly. She is close and judging from his screwed up expression she knew he is close as well.

He increases his hold on her. He swears and squeezes his eyes shut as he started to reach his climax. Yelena wraps her arms around him and she buries herself into the crook of his neck.

They held on like this until they rode out their orgasm. A shudder coursed through their bodies as they let it all out. Yelena bites down on his neck to stop herself from crying out while Bucky grits his teeth. When it was done Yelena pulls away and tries to catch her breath. Bucky lifts his hand and wipes the sweat from his brow, dazed by what has happened.

Yelena climbs off the bed and starts to get dressed. Bucky blinks a few times and frowns at her.

"That it? You are just gonna leave?"

Yelena pulls on her jumper and looks at him.

"You think I was going to come into bed with you for more cuddles?" She shakes her head. "Not my style Barnes."

"But?"

"But what?" She zips up her jeans and puts her hands on her hips. "What do you expect me to say? Talk about how big your dick was boost your ego?"

He glares at her.

"No."

"Well then there is nothing more to say."

Bucky tries to hide the hurt but he couldn't. Yelena quickly ties her hair up into a messy ponytail looking everywhere but him.

She walks to the door. When her hand went on the handle she paused.

"You can go on top next time."

Next time.

Bucky smiles at her words.

"I am not going to refuse that." He smirks at her.

She glances over her shoulder. She responds with a small smile of her own as she turns the handle and leaves the room. Feeling the most human she has felt in a long time.

The End

#fanfiction #one shot #fanfic #smut #angst #marvel cinematic universe #bucky x yelena #bucklena #yelena belova #bucky barnes #romance #love #healing #hurt/comfort #thunderbolts #marvel fanfiction

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iamnotapalindrome · 1 year

Text

Constellations

This is how I imagine Steve might paint Bucky. Happy birthday Bucky Barnes!

11x14"-ish mixed media (watercolor, ink, acrylic, colored pencil) on hot-press watercolor paper

Also posted on AO3

#bucky barnes #james buchanan barnes #winter soldier #traditional art #mixed media #painting #symbolism #surrealism #healing imagery #stars #constellations #kintsugi #implied Stucky #fanart #bucky barnes fanart #stucky fanart #will I now paint the companion piece or will I simply go insane #art

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stardropsandrain · 30 days

Text

Bucky w/ a partner with depression

Tw!!; Depression, medication mentions, and therapy mentions

Please do enjoy

Depression keeps you tired. It's hard to find motivation. Bucky constantly tries to help, but know when to back away and leave you be

Bucky won't help you if you refuse to help yourself. Bucky is a man who's done enough healing, who has gone through too much, to have to heal someone else

Bucky makes sure you attend your therapy appointments, even if you don't want to go. He helps you get dressed before driving you there, if you don't want to drive. He sends you off with a kiss on the forehead before heading off to buy groceries

Bucky helps you keep a schedule without pushing you too far. He makes sure you wake up before certain times, so you can have plenty of time to work but also relax. He reminds you to take your medicine and eat

He loves holding you. When the world seems so tired and boring and nothing really feels worth it, he holds you. He puts on a show and rubs little circles into your thighs as you cuddle, reminding you, "small moments like this are to live for. You don't always need something huge, like a deadline or grand scheme to justify living"

He helps you catch bad habits you may have. He'll call them out to remind you to stop, but he isn't your father. He won't do it every time. He helps you become self-reliant and work on those bad, destructive habits

Bucky tends to keep his spaces clean, but not to clean. If it's barren, it reminds him of the four walls that kept him locked away for so long. It will trigger a panic attack. So, while not barren, but dislikes messy places. The clutter overwhelms and short wires his brain, so he helps you clean however you need

On days when things are bad, you barely want to talk or interact with even Bucky. He'll get you outside. It was recommended by your therapist. He'll take you outside and you'll go to the park. Watch life around you and take in the scenery and environment. He'll hold your hand and point out small things along the way, encouraging you to do the same. Soon, it will become a cute I spy game

Happy food. Bucky loves to experiment in the kitchen, learning new foods. He loves to cook your happy foods whenever you need them. He tries to help regulate your eating so you don't binge or the opposite without being overbearing

Bucky loves you. You know a lot about each other. You've helped each other. Bucky will never forget what you've done for him to help him heal, and he will always help you with your journey

A/N; Bucky healing is my Roman empire

Good riddance and stay safe 🖤🖤🖤

#spotify #x male reader #x gn reader #bucky barnes #bucky x male reader #depression cw #healing #mental health #love #bucky barnes x gender neutral reader #helping hand #therapy #medication

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