#I know a lot of people struggle with Daisy as a character because a lot of her traits are really triggering which is totally valid

[the-magpie-archives]

Daisy and Basira's relationship is such a sweet agony, because at its foundation it's so transparent, so honest. They both know what they're doing, however much they pretend to lie or hide it. Such is the situation they're in that there's no choice but to cling to eachother.

Have you ever been in that sort of situation? The type where the closest person to you is deeply morally flawed and you're realising just how in the wrong you are, but their hand is the only one to grasp. You see the claws along their fingertips and you turn your head and hold them close.

On many occasions Basira talks about the wrong Daisy's done, she knows where Daisy's kill spot is, she figured that's where Jon would be. And yet she never tries to convince everyone that she's capable of fixing daisy, because she knows she's not. Daisy knows this just as well, and perhaps it's a foundation of their trust.

To be loved is to be changed but to be changed is to be hated; a relationship where you accept each others flaws is a commodity, and a rare one at that. Whether those flaws are mundane or deeply damaging, these kinds of connections have a tendancy to grow beyond the point of return.

To know that you're in the wrong together is a comfort. It's not good, nor is it right, but it's a place you can sit. A place you can stay. And as your comfort grows so does that leeching wrongness you protect, and in the end it may just eat you up.

To continue the way Daisy and Basira did was what drove them towards their end, but even at that last painful moment there was a tenderness, a rose in the thorns that makes the wounds worthwhile.

#I know a lot of people struggle with Daisy as a character because a lot of her traits are really triggering which is totally valid #But she's just stunningly written and her connection to Basira is painfully beautiful #Exploring sapphic love in a wrong‚ bloodied‚ awful‚ painful way is something that's so important... #And even if you don't ship them just that connection #Even the most evil people have beauty to their lives and that's one of the reasons so many folks are swept up into bad ways #But regardless of the meaning of her story I do love Daisy #(and of course I'm obsessed with Basira but I feel like that goes without saying) #tma #the magnus archives #the magnus institute #daisy tonner #basira hussain #jonathan sims #tma analysis #tw blood #tw horror #tw toxic relationship #tw violent imagery #Reading all of this back I'm realising some of it probably doesn't make any sense but I'm too tired to fix it #Do message me if there's any of it you wanna discuss or feel should be changed 😌

[red-hibiscus]

BL characters I relate to most as a mentally ill gay trans man

Daisy from SCOY

Surprising no one, I, a trans person, relate to Daisy. They're outgoing and seemingly don't care about how people view them. They know they're visibly queer and they normally don't mind it (from what I see). But at the end of the day, society does affect them. They're hesitant to believe Touch genuinely cares and is attracted to them despite Touch being an absolute green flag who is very direct with his flirting. Even after, Daisy was worried about people would view their relationship with Touch and tried to become Day, a more masculine version of themself. Impossible of course and they broke down emotionally exhausted. I feel that so much because I also don't believe it when people, especially cis gay men, are attracted to me. I've caught myself trying to change my behavior to be more masculine (as I'm a bit on the nonbinary side of things). It's bad, but I know how Daisy feels.

Wang from 180 Degree Longtitude Passes Through Us

As a 26 year old trans gay immigrant in a country that doesn't want me, I have a shit ton of pent up anger that has been building up since I was a child. I've calmed down over the years, but I can still be stubborn and argumentative when it comes to politics and human rights. I'm also a linguistics major, thus an academic.

Wang is so much like myself and like a lot of people around me. Like me and Wang would be close friends irl I know it. We're young and stubborn. We're angry at the older conservative people around us, too much sometimes. So he lashes out. Many of his points are correct, but they're not hitting. Partially because the people he's talking to don't want to change, partially because he himself is stubborn. People like us yearn to be free, to be ourselves and to learn. Wang has a passion for the humanities like myself. Yet he knows society really only cares about STEM fields. I've compromised and am getting a master's in computational linguistics. Even though really I just wanna learn as much as I can about sociolinguistics.

Karl from Gaya Sa Pelikula

I haven't watched GSP in a hot minute, but I do remember feeling very seen.

So in the show Karl has his gay awakening, tries to internally and externally deny it, and eventually let himself be free to feel everything and be himself (at least in private).

Now I didn't have a gay awakening, but I guess you could say a trans awakening. In middle school I felt different, I suspected maybe some flavor of LGBT, but wasn't sure and I was too afraid to think about it too hard. Come high school I secretly wanted to join the LGBT club, but was afraid. Then I was essentially adopted into the LGBT club and dragged into the friend group during lunch because I was a loner like everyone else. At the time still "identified" as a cishet woman. As time went on people started to suspect. "Why are you in the club?", "why did you cut your hair", "why do you dress like that?", "your voice is low for a girl haha", etc. Much like Karl, I was not ready for any of that. I was still struggling to make sense of it all and come to terms with it myself. So I kept rejecting it and every time it hurt.

I kept rejecting it until I couldn't. Until someone I resonated with so much came out as trans and it clicked. My trans awakening was complete. I became able to be more myself, but only in private safe spaces. I wouldn't come out and live as a man until after high school and it was terrifying.

Adachi from Cherry Magic

I've only watched the jpn ver, but I'm sure that character remains the same.

I'm anxious and used to be quite shy. Now I'm just awkward. I'm really bad at seeing the good in myself cause I feel like I'm wandering around aimlessly in life. Not that impressive. So when people compliment me I think "haha they're just being nice" (refer back to me never believing people are actually attracted to me).

Adachi is the exact same. He has the same routine every day. Just going through the motions and not really thinking anything of himself. But then Kurosawa comes along and the ability to read minds. Adachi then realizes "wait, someone I respect so much actually loves me? And thinks I have a lot of good qualities? Makes me wanna cry." And me too Adachi. I'd be the same.

Jared from 7 Days Before Valentine

Jared, my precious baby, is described throughout the show as kind, but weird and different. We later learn that he has dyslexia, and honestly he seems to be somewhere on the autism spectrum. Even if he isn't, he has a behavioral difference people pick up on and then shun him for it.

I too was seen as kinda weird growing up. Maybe it was the autism, maybe it was the social anxiety. Probably both. And then of course there was the gnawing feeling that I was different than everyone else and it turns out it's because I'm trans.

So when Jared said that people didn't talk to him because he wasn't like other people it hit me so hard.

Myungha from Love For Love's Sake

The whole show is sad yet cathartic for me. Myungha is depressed yet spends his time comforting others. He has a hard time loving and receiving love. If you give him a fictional character who is very similar to him he will love them and see all the good, but he doesn't see it in himself. Relatable as hell.

I have an incredibly hard time being honest with my emotions and letting people love me and express attraction. Mostly in a romantic/sexual context. Dpdr is cockblocking me. So dating is hell, but I'm lonely and yearn to not be.

Probably if you put me in a situation like Myungha I'd also go "yep, that right there is my blorbo" and then not realize that all the things I like about the person and make me care about them are things I have.

Honorable mentions:

Both Akk and Ayan from The Eclipse

Nozue from Old Fashion Cupcake

Oh-Aew from I Told Sunset About You

Cher from A Boss and a Babe (I headcannon him as autistic)

Amber from DNA Says Love You

Uea from Bed Friend

Mitsuomi from Restart After Come Back Home

Jao from SCOY

Maybe I'll make another post for those later

#comment or reblog/tag who you resonate with most!! #thai bl #korean bl #japanese bl #filipino bl #bl series #secret crush on you the series #secret crush on you #180 degree longitude passes through us #7 days before valentine the series #7 days before valentine #gaya sa pelikula #like in the movies #cherry magic #love for love's sake #the eclipse #old fashion cupcake #restart after come back home #i told sunset about you #a boss and a babe #dna says i love you #bed friend the series

[kikiofthevast]

In planning Slay the Archivist I’ve been having a lot of Jon thoughts (below the cut because it got long)

Jon Sims is a character driven entirely by fear. His fear of spiders and trauma of his youth further isolates him from people, his fear of rejection and being known isolates him from his peers and Georgie, and his fear of the forces beyond isolates him from his coworkers (manifested in his short-fuse prickly skeptic persona).

Jon is a character who pushes people away before they can do it to him and cannot conceive that anyone can care about him.

Which is unfortunate, because his assistants do care about him!!! Not on an intimate level, but Jon and Tim at the very least are friends, and Jon respects Sasha!!!

Jon’s actual opinion of Martin in s1 is a bit cloudy, because it’s clear that Jon does not respect him or like him very much, but that mostly comes from the fact that Martin doesn’t do his job very well, or at least by the standards Jon expects based on his CV.

But on the other hand, Jon never expresses anything other than professional disdain, not necessarily personal disdain. Of course, it’s likely that Jon does truly hate Martin, but outside of the recordings in S1, Jon is significantly more generally relaxed (as shown in the tape about ostriches) and his professional academic persona is very much a mask that he puts on to alleviate his own nerves about the job.

That’s not to say Jon likes Martin very much in S1, but it says to me that he doesn’t outright hate him.

Then the worms happen.

Everything falls apart for Jon. His skeptic act isn’t keeping him safe, not like he thought it would, and Jane Prentiss is after him specifically.

Jon starts unraveling after the Prentiss attack.

Something is watching him. Someone killed Gertrude. He can’t trust anyone.

Most of his paranoia is Stranger-induced but it’s also equally a natural response. Of course, he takes it too far, and he neglects his relationships because he doesn’t think they mean anything to the people in question.

Jon is right to be paranoid, and his paranoia is validated by the fact that one of his assistants was replaced and Elias is passively manipulating him (and also killed Gertrude), but the issue is that stalking is a bridge too far.

He has a very strong connection to the Eye even early on because he needs to know everything and gain new knowledge especially about people.

Because Jon is bad at connecting with people, and he typically barely has the self-awareness to avoid sticking his foot in his mouth and he is NOT forthcoming about his trauma or struggles to any extent (we’ll come back to this) and therefore doesn’t really understand how relationships WORK.

So his breaks his slightly tenuous friendship with Tim, realizes that Martin is not as knowledgeable than he thought, and realizes that there’s a creature in his Archive that should not be there.

So he destroys the table, realizes that was also a mistake, gets chased, meets Leitner, and then is IMMEDIATELY framed for his murder.

So Jon is now on the run from the law, so he goes to the only person in his life he actually confided in to some degree, Georgie.

Georgie asks questions, but not many, and accepts that he won’t answer. She lets him stay with her and the Admiral and Jon tries not to get her involved, because he doesn’t want someone else to realize that he’s doomed everyone around him, and he doesn’t want Georgie to be doomed.

He talks to people, gets scars, tries to get away from Daisy, nearly dies to Daisy, learns that GEORGIE had an encounter and feels guilty that she gets involved, and then he gets kidnapped from Georgie’s house.

Nikola finds him and kidnaps him and he is there for a while. I don’t remember if the length of time is specified, but it’s a while, enough time for him to be missed.

Then Elias shows his true colors, Melanie and Basira are in the Archives, and Jon doesn’t know what to do.

He’s lost and doesn’t feel like he can trust anyone, and oh yeah, Tim hates his guts.

Jon goes to America, meets people, meets Gerry, burns Gerry’s page, goes to China, comes back to the Institute, and still has no idea what’s happening to him but he knows it’s bad, but feels good.

Because knowing puts him in control of a situation. Having that advantage alleviates some of his fear, and it gives him power.

Jon, who has not felt in control of anything since he picked up a Leitner as a child, craves that power.

And then there’s the Unknowing.

The Unknowing is a turning point for Jon, because arguably, the human Jonathan Sims dies in the explosion.

But his brain continues on, his consciousness continues on, and he exists in the dreams of people he watches fear and hurt over and over.

Martin spends time with him in the hospital, before he starts working in the Lonely, working to save his friends that aren’t functionally dead in a hospital bed, or already dead.

Oliver gives him a push to accept his Becoming, to wake up and live in his new existence.

And when he wakes up, everyone wishes he hadn’t.

Jon is functionally changed as a person. He wants to confide in people, wants to be someone people trust, and uh …

Yeah that’s not happening.

Elias may be in jail, but Melanie and Basira (and presumably also Martin, but it’s unclear) are still tied to the Archives due to Jon’s continuing life.

Jon is at a low point this season, and Melanie and Basira have complicated relationships with him.

Georgie has also accepted that Jon isn’t going to change, which is a shame for Jon, but well within her right as someone who has been trying to help Jon for years and never actually got through to him.

Melanie projects a lot of her blame onto Jon, when she can’t take it out on Elias. A lot of her rage is being amplified by the bullet in her leg, but the impromptu surgery doesn’t make Melanie any less wary of him.

And Jon pulls Daisy out of the Buried too, and the tapes become his anchor, his connection to the Archives and the Eye strong enough to pull him out.

The Eye is also strong enough to make him need live statements. Like Daisy needs to Hunt, Jon needs to Know.

It’s treated like an addiction in the show as much as it’s treated as a necessary thing, but the important thing is that Jon now needs to hurt people in order to survive.

The issue is that he likes it, he likes causing the fear and not experiencing it. He likes witnessing and knowing and archiving it, but he hates that he likes it because it means he’s not human.

(I personally think Jon can do whatever he wants forever but that’s just me)

Jon tries not to take live statements, but he cannot resist it forever. He knows so much but it’s never enough and he wants more.

(Mr. Spider always wants more.)

Jon also clings to the last bit of the normal past he has left in Martin, who he has learned to appreciate far too late for it to mean something to him, but even when Jon is in danger, he still goes for Martin, because Martin doesn’t deserve to get hurt.

They don’t know each other well beyond a surface level, but they are also the last thing that connects them both to the Normal, the Before.

They latch onto each other and clearly care about each other, but in S5 their relationship is far from ideal even though it’s the only thing keeping them both together.

They are in love, but they’re also missing a lot of development in their relationship.

(Arguably this makes it more realistic, but that’s a whole other post)

Causing the apocalypse weighs on Jon. He damns the world to horror and fear until the End and it’s not even his fault. Of course, it was preventable, but like many things in this show, it just didn’t happen that way.

Jon Knows the new world much better than the rest of the cast. He knows there’s no hope, that there’s only the perpetrators and the victims.

And he wants to be the one on top, over Jonah. He doesn’t tell anyone that, but based purely on his previous expressions of the apocalypse feeling right to him and the way his powers and knowledge make him feel, it stands to reason he would harbor that desire even if he wouldn’t express it.

And that’s why he inevitably kills Jonah and attempts to take his place, because if they’re going to continue living in this world, he wants to Know Everything and be in the Panopticon.

It’s selfish, but Jon does it anyway, because that’s what he wants. If the world is doomed, he wants to be king of it, if only to drink in the fear until the End took them all.

But he’s also grateful when Martin stabs him, on some level. He doesn’t want the Entities pulled into different worlds, but he also to some degree doesn’t want to go beyond his current state. Becoming on par with a god does scare him, to some degree.

And so Jon dies in Martin’s arms, and with love on his lips.

He’s a complicated man, one who cares but doesn’t ever know how to show it and is an insufferable asshole who doesn’t know when to stop.

Curiosity killed this cat, but satisfaction brought him back.

#kiki talks #tma #the magnus archives #meta #jonathan sims #jarchivist #reducing jon to either solely a victim or solely a perpetrator is faulty #hes just jon yk

[cyeayt]

whats ur tim headcanons :)

oooh i have so many i can sort them into appearance, character arc, and sillies, a lot of these are lifted from fics i like fyi,,, ty so much for the ask, this is very rambly lol

i tend to think of Tim as Malay mostly because of Head in the Lion's Mouth and renwhit's other works with the stoker bros which rewrote my brain although in my mind he has short hair instead of long like he has in those series. i also have fallen to the fanon of him wearing colorful button ups but i don't really like him in aloha shirts just cause i think he has better taste than that, i also think he has his ears pierced and i am not immune to the idea that he wears a shark tooth necklace he got from Danny. I do also think that he had his hair shorter and dyed purple on the ends in season 1 that he then stopped taking care of in season 2 so it was washed out green and all messy by season 3, by which time i also think his fashion had deteriorated and to me he was at the unknowing in the rattiest hoodie imaginable and jeans he had been wearing for at least 4 days. he can have a graphic tee as a treat but he was def greasy.

in terms of his character i have a lot of stuff that i think are headcanons that are actually just canon (like that he knew something was up with sasha before not-sasha was revealed or that he felt comfortable in research before getting drawn back into the horror) because i have a really shitty memory but heres some stuff im pretty sure isn't plain stated in the text: he and Jon bonded in research and were very close before Jon became the archivist, and part of how they bonded was that they were both overworking themselves looking for their answers and also they're really good at breaking into places together. i am also a sucker for the idea that jon and him were involved or dancing around something but had to break it off when jon got promoted. speaking of hcs with high angst potential, i also think a lot about subtle rituals of intimacy between him and sasha and the small ways in which he would have noticed that there was something off with her. i also see him as being estranged from his parents/ them suspecting him of having something to do with Danny's death, which is not helped by the box of photos n such i think he keeps hidden in his closet/under his bed. in terms of his mentality Tim is really relatable to me i think he really struggles to be trusted in meaningful ways and that Jon suspecting him of murdering Gertrude brought back a lot of bad memories of police and his parents thinking he killed Danny. he gets stuck into patterns of though and mindsets esp when hes depressed and has trouble thinking of things in different terms in s3. also he did nothing wrong but thats neither here nor there

sillies! hcs that have little support but i think are funny, shipping stuff, and like whatever.

It's not really supported by canon unless you think he was playing 4d chess with Basira in s2 but in my mind Daisy and Basira were the ones investigating Danny's disappearance and they have a bad history. i like to put this one in my aus/ give him and daisy and basira a weird antagonistic relationship whenever i can because i think its funny when people are bitter with each other.

while i do agree that Tim would enjoy outdoorsy stuff like rockclimbing or kayaking, i don't think he's that good at it. i def see him as like the nerdier brother and think that he got into stuff that he and Danny did together, but it would be like Danny trying to convince him to go on the black diamond while Tim zigzags his way down a blue square. idk what the rock climbing equivalent of that is but i do know that tim cannot do bouldering.

i also see tim as being aro-spec like demi-romantic bisexual or somewhere in there idk im aflux aroflux its all soup to me but he and sasha are queerplatonic to me. also don't @ me i think he at the very least flirted with elias a few times either pre-archives for funzies or at some point in s2-3 when he stopped giving a shit.

hcs are so fun bc they're like little outfits you can put your character in like not every fic i write will have all of these and some of my more minute ones contradic each other but they're like ships to me anywayyy

#tim stoker #timothy stoker #tma #my hcs #man i need to start writing tma fic again #polyarchives #i kinda wanna make a uquiz that assigns different tim ships or something #asks #thatforgottenbasilisk

[daisyssousa]

Hi. I hope you don't mind me asking your opinion, as a disabled person, about comments I've seen about Sousa's new prosthetic. I realize no group is a monolith, so you won't provide THE difinitive answer, but I would like hear from someone who actually lives through it.

So, why is Sousa's new prosthetic considered ableist but his old prosthetic was not? Is it because his disability is no longer obvious? But if the new prosthetic works better, why is that a bad thing? Sorry, I guess that's three questions. I really hope this didn't come off offensive, I genuinely just want to understand.

I hope your having a great day and have fun blocking the anti-Dousy trolls😊

Hi there! <333 Thank you very much for the question! It's not offensive at all!

As you pointed out, we're not a monolith, so I definitely can't speak for every disabled person out there, nor am I trying to! If someone is legitimately offended, they completely have a right to their feelings. I'm also not an amputee, so I can't speak to that either.

I think there are some people who feel that because his new prosthetic made it so that he can walk completely normally, they feel like it's erasing his disability. There are a few reasons I heavily disagree with this mindset:

It doesn't erase his disability at all: He will still have to care for his leg the same way he would with any other prosthetic. He will still have to keep it clean and take care of the skin to keep from getting it irritated, injured, or infected. He will have to keep up care of his remaining leg muscles too to be able to use it. It's mechnical and electronic, so the prosthetic itself will require maintinence and upkeep as most tech does. It's not going to be like poof! His leg is magically healed! When you get down to it: his new leg is still not his real leg.

I do think there is room for criticism in the sense that Agents of Shield didn't show this on screen. In fairness, perhaps they thought in showing Coulson and Yoyo previously struggling with their prosthetics, they thought maybe it would be enough since season 7 was already crammed. I do think they should've given us at least a little something though. But still: it didn't erase Coulson or Yoyo's disabilities, so it wouldn't erase Sousa's either.

Technological advances: With all the technological advances of the Marvel world and all of Fitzsimmons' inventions, giving Sousa a high tech prosthetic is completely within reason. It isn't like the Agents of Shield writers magically pulled special technology out of nowhere to specifically "erase" his disability, there was already a precendent set with Coulson and Yoyo (and Bucky Barnes). And also LMDs. Even Daisy's gaunlets are prosthetics in a way, since they keep her bones from breaking when she quakes.

If they'd retconned his missing leg or used some kind of hand-wavy magic to get it back, then yeah I could see the argument. But that's not what happened.

Real world technological advancements are catching up too: there are already prosthetics in development that use the electrical impulses of the brain to move the prosthetic limb and allow the person to feel sensations! There are also battery powered mechnical ones. Should real amputees be barred from using these because it "erases" their struggle? No. (btw I am not aiming this at you anon, this is me speaking in general! <3)

Sousa's wish to walk again is in character: Sousa expressed in episode 2x08 of Agent Carter: "I know desperation. You know what I'd give to be able to walk again? A lot." He even uses the word "desperate." This is fulfilling a character trait he had in Agent Carter. It didn't come from Agents of Shield. He wants to be able to walk and is accepting of the prosthetic.

It grants him more freedom of movement and less pain: Especially considering they were in the middle of a dangerous mission, giving him more movement and less pain to hinder him is extremely helpful. And in general, why shouldn't he be able to use something that helps him be in less pain and do more every day? No one should be forced to struggle just to prove they're disabled! (Again not directed at you anon, in general <3)

Anyway, my brain is turning a bit mushy, but I hope this helps you anon! <333

#agents of shield #agent carter #daniel sousa #dousy #phil coulson #elena rodriguez #anonymous; #inbox; #I often have pain to the point I can't walk for weeks or sometimes up to a month and I have to use mobility aids; not always but enough #if someone came up to me and was like 'here have a new spine that won't hurt you and help you live normally again I'd be like heck yeah!

[agabus]

in regards to the recent update does anyone else find it weird how bowser's anger issues are treated in the series, like by the other characters? as someone who's struggled with pretty severe anger management problems in the past it's possible i just overly empathize with bowser, but especially how daisy was talking to him this ep feels like something i've experienced a lot.

when you have anger issues, everything you get angry about becomes unreasonable. the people in your life stop caring. you're never genuinely offended, you're never hurt, you're never justified. you're just an asshole. you're just having one of your outbursts again.

"i didn't even insult you!" -- no, you didn't intend to insult him. daisy's usually pretty insightful, if it were anyone other than bowser she'd been talking to, she probably would have realized that what she said could be misconstrued (like, idk, "you are financially abusing your wife and taking advantage of her needs") and at least clarified if not apologized. but not bowser, bowser's just being crazy and violent again.

not even to MENTION bringing up his horns. i know daisy doesn't know bowser's a koopa, but bowser does, and to him, she essentially said "stop blaming how people treat you on racism, people treat you badly because you suck" which is another huge thing for people with anger problems, if you are a minority, you also magically don't face any discrimination anymore. they're not being sexist you're being a bitch, they're not being racist you're being scary, they're not being bigoted you're being uppity, sit down.

i don't know. personally i'm really proud of him. he has anger issues, but he knows that about himself and does his best to stay in control. being able to remove yourself from a situation like that when you're triggered, especially not even trying to get the last word to defend yourself, just "i need to go", is so fucking hard. and he did it for daisy, who he already doesn't like, after what he thought of as an insult on his character. that's badass idk.

#also daisy is just kind of tactless in general 😐 i get that she's supposed to be the ''straight man'' for peach #but girl please develop a filter #mariolore

[dandyleyen]

TMA RELISTEN — MAG 142

Spoilers, duh !

—

This one was a rough listen, y'all. On one hand, it was so interesting. It makes a lot of sense that this is where Jon is going with his whole,,, everything. We've seen him slipping a bit more into actively using his powers as of late, and we got to see that again in the last ep. At first, he wasn't aware he had powers at all, and then down the line when he becomes more aware of certain entities/fears existing, he was often not aware that he was even using his in the first place. Then we see a shift where he is aware of these powers and actively trying not to use them very much while knowing he still has to feed his, which is a rough time for him (the whole podcast is a rough time for him lmao rip buddy), and now we've seen another shift. He is actively trying to use his powers and his moral compass might be shifting a little bit ? He still is very much the Jon we know— in the sense that he is still feeling a lot of guilt (survivor's and otherwise) over past events and that he's trying to find control in his life while doing his best to help. But we also see that he's getting more... at ease, I suppose, with feeding into his being an avatar of the eye.

On the other hand, this episode was also genuinely hard to listen to. You can really hear the character's distress and how pained she sounds by having to relive her trauma and then feeling like she can't escape it or Jon. She has no clue who he is, just that he's some freak of a guy who kinda took her autonomy away for a moment there and forced her to tell her story that she did not want to tell. It's rough. Also it really highlights the more creepy aspects about The Eye.

I've also seen the theories about her either lying or it maybe not being Jon (he wasn't at all mentioned by name), but I think the lying would be a,,, particularly bad choice on the end of the people writing the show for obvious reasons. Slippery slope thing. On it possibly not being Jon,,, idk actually. He wasn't mentioned but I think it would be a nice addition if it was him because it makes sense within the current narrative since we do see him struggling with his humanity. But hey, who knows. Could be some other supernatural bs. Haven't mentioned the ending much but Martin,,, I love and adore you but you are incredibly frustrating this season. I understand why, but lord. Still love him, I just don't like this plotline for him too much but it does make sense in the narrative so I'm locked in. Also shoutout to Daisy for being the only one here with critical thinking skills !

#and we're back #my bad y'all lmao im busy reading homestuck rn and watching dunmeshi #and im in april of my spring term so its finals time #also dont get me wrong i hate this plotline for martin but i do love him #i just cannot fucking stand peter lukas #also yippee jon being spooky #i have a big fear w/ being watched but im also endlessly seeking knowledge and info so The Eye always stands out to me #the magnus archives #TMA relisten #MAG 142 #TMA #jonathan sims #Jon TMA #Martin TMA #Daisy TMA #tma spoilers

[daisiesonafield-blog]

Dear Daisie, I’ve watched AOTV and really liked it but now I read about that one friend of Louis who even got to speak in the movie and I am speechless and a bit shocked. How can that be a friend of our Louis? Any thoughts?

https://twitter.com/kabir_nizam?s=21&t=j0oMmEOJbP5dXK-SPSNEmw

Hi dear,

I got a lot of questions about this, so I'll answer it once.

I'll be honest, I struggle to understand too, and I was surprised to see him in the documentary. I think this stuff about Nizam has come up before too, and I've heard some extremely shitty things about him, and how he acted in his friendship with Louis at one point in time. But we also don't know the intricacies of their relationship.

I think a lot of people have a hard time completely cutting off friends who they grew up with, because they were a very big part of your life. I know nowadays, especially online, we're all ready to condemn and cut off people. But it's harder to do so in real life, and with people who we were close with during important times of our lives. I think this could be the case with Nizam and Louis.

I know someone who has a similar situation, of having a friend who they grew up, and were very close to for years and years. Knew them since they were kids. As this person grew up, and got more educated, they started to notice their friend's harmful views and racism, and didn't consider them such close friends anymore. But they also chose to not cut them off entirely, and may still follow each other on social media or see each other when they're back in their hometowns.

The context is also important. Nizam was included in a segment talking about Louis' struggle, trauma and grief losing his mom, and shortly after losing his sister. It was a very dark and difficult time in Louis' life, and he relied a lot on his childhood friends at that time. One of which was Nizam - so he included him to talk about that topic because he saw Louis go through it behind the scenes.

Beyond any of that, it's very clear that Louis is an extremely loving, kind and understanding person, who is emotionally intelligent and who can navigate tough relationships. He is sure of himself, who he is, and his personal values. As such, I think he's someone who would choose to give a friend he grew up with more grace and understanding. Nizam's views aren't Louis' views. That's not the issue here. Whatever sort of relationship they have, is obviously layered because they've been friends since they were kids. And regardless of what Nizam believes, he was still in Louis' life at important times, and Louis holds value in that, and may have chosen to not cut him off.

Also, I need to emphasize, we DO NOT KNOW Louis' relationship to him, or how close they currently are. And judging Louis' character on another person's views is not fair to Louis either. Within the context that Nizam was in the movie, he only spoke about Louis' loss. That's the extent of his involvement in the doc. He was there during that time, so I think that's why Louis could have included him.

#nizam kabir #louis' friends #donny lads #all of those voices #aotv

[taralen]

Announcement? Other things!

Hey, everyone, so besides commissions and all my SPECIL SALESMAN art, I would also like to share more things (like original art) and draw fanart for other things. Spamton G. Spamton is a mainstay on my blog. He is very important to me, and if you don't like him, then too bad!

My range of interests is absolutely massive, and as one fan/friend of mine said to me years ago, "You're like a mystery box of surprises!"

Here is what I plan to make art and possible theories or analyses for:

[[please note that a lot of my interests are 17-18+, but anything uploaded here will be kept SFW or cropped. All NSFW stuff will go to my Pixiv account. I highly recommend to NOT look up the origin if you are a minor or sensitive to explicit content.]]

Queen's Blade Franchise (17+) - I really want to make more art of my favorite character, Alleyne the Elven Fighting Master, and possibly her apprentice, Nowa!

Higurashi no Naku Koro Ni (17+ GORE HORROR. Do not look up if you are sensitive.) - Recently fell in love with this series. I consider the original anime from the 2000s to be a masterpiece. I want to draw my favorite character, Takano!

Taimanin universe (17-18+. Seriously don't look it up if you're a minor lol.) - I really love some of the characters of this series, like my waifu Ingrid. I've drawn her before, and I want to draw her again. Funny enough, one of my pieces is featured in the mobile game Action Taimanin as a poster on the wall for a level. Sometimes, I see people use my art as an icon. It's very flattering!

Dragon Half (15+) - One of my all-time favorite mangas ever made from the 1980s. I think it's long overdue I make a fanart for it.

Winx Club - I have numerous unfinished fanarts for this series. I love it so much, even though Sailor Moon is superior lmfao.

Shoujo Tsubaki (18+. BANNED WORLDWIDE. DO NOT LOOK IT UP if you are sensitive or if you are a minor) - I watched this two nights ago, and it's so sad... I plan to do an analysis of it. I honestly don't think it's the worst thing ever, but I can see why people find it offensive, as it touches upon A LOT OF taboo topics.

Psychonauts - This game series man... So good. I want to draw something of my favorite character, Helmut, and his husband, Bobby. I just absolutely adore them. 😭

Touhou Project - It's been a long time since I've drawn proper fanart for this series. I have A LOT on my DeviantArt account, but I'd like to draw my favorite girls again.

Super Mario Bros - Peach is my original waifu. I've tried drawing her many times in my style, but I've kind of failed. I also really like Princess Daisy's N64 version and want to draw her again. Rosalina/Rosetta, I will also think about it.

The Legend of Zelda - This one is a little... Difficult for me. This is one of my favorite game series ever, but I really struggle to make art for it. I want to since it heavily inspired my work, but damn is it hard... Hopefully, I can break out of my shell for this.

Various other Eroge titles (18+) - Eroge are any games with erotic elements that originate from Japan. There are so many I like that range from simply being romantic to utterly insane. If you're a minor, do not look up anything.

Runescape - How I love thee. It's been a while since I've drawn fanart for it. I love the Elves haha!

Creepypasta or ghost legends/stories - I've been listening to a lot of these lately and I feel a bit inspired to draw some of the things that pop up in my imagination.

That's all for the non-original stuff. I'm still hesitant to post OCs here because they got 100% ignored last time. xD

Stuff of mine I won't ever upload to this blog:

18+ NSFW. Obvious. Do you want me to get banned?? I can draw fanart for something adult without it being NSFW.

Fetish stuff. I know I get commissioned a lot to draw fetish art, but all this will remain on DeviantArt.

Anyway, that's all I can think of right now.

#musings #drawing ideas #Oof when listed out my interest list is an absolute dumpster fire

[namusthetic]

The Four Seasons

Color guide for the characters' comments:

Winter; Spring; Summer; Autumn;

_______

Winter

Jittery because had way too much sugar

Started buying presents and wrapping them in September

Has a special mug for every occasion

Likes to relax by the fire while reading or scrolling through their phone

Gives Christmas-themed socks to everyone

Sits in weird positions

Loud and affectionate with people they feel close with (even too affectionate... )

Cold and unforgiving when pissed

Has a reading list and is gonna finish it before the year ends (hopefully)

Struggles with anger management

Smiles at strangers on the street

Starts stuttering and their lisp comes out when too nervous or excited (I heard Autumn saying it was cute - oh really? - S-spring!!!!!!)

Loves surprises

Prideful, gets offended easily, but also forgives and forgets easily (it took us a whole afternoon to get them to open the door just because the three of us hung out without them - still don't know why we bothered. - HEY!!! )

Calls instead of texting

Ready to throw hands if any of their friends gets bullied or insulted

Aesthetics:

Hot chocolate and a crackling fireplace, Christmas songs and mulled wine, snow and cold wind, warm scarves and knitted gloves, snow angles and snowball fights, smirks and fistbumps, warm sweaters and tight hugs, doodles on frosty window panes, dad jokes and uncoordinated dance moves

Playlist:

Mr. Blue Sky by Electric Light Orchestra

Everybody Talks by Neon Trees

Don't Stop Me Now by Queen

Tongue Tied by Grouplove

(I Can Get No) Satisfaction by The Rolling Stones

This Side of Paradise by Coyote Theory

Line Without a Hook by Ricky Montgomery

Eleanor Rigby by Cody Fry

Somebody To Love by Queen

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas by Michael Bublé

Snowman by Sia

Winter Wonderland by Michael Bublé

Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy by Queen

_______

Spring

Has various nervous tics because of anxiety

Always sitting on the floor

Often with their head in the clouds (AM NOT! - darling, I've literally seen you walk into door frames more times than I can count - ... )

Almost never raises their voice

Starts reading a book, then forgets about it and starts another one

Gets lost in daydreaming and dissociates from reality

Defends strongly what they believe in

"If I were a frog you'd be welcome on my lily pad"

Starts projects but never finishes them

Sensitive, cries easily when animals and environment is involved

In touch with their emotions and nature (and also with summer apparently - if you don't shut up, I swear. - Autumn, help me!! - oh, hell nah)

Spends long afternoons having pic-nics in the park, reading, sleeping and sunbathing

Walks in the woods looking for fae traps and playing hide and seek with foxes

Aesthetics:

Flower crowns, pic-nics and apricot jam, sunshine filtering through the leaves, birds chirping and bubbly laughter, bumblebees and bees flying from flower to flower, soft singing, flower crowns and daisy chains, curious eyes and pastel colors, small frogs and lilly pads, strawberry toasts and herbal teas, sweet smiles and paint-stained hands

Playlist:

Ocean Eyes by Billie Eilish

Cool Kids by Echosmith

Ophelia by The Lumineers

Hey There Delilah by Plain White T's

Swing Lynn by Harmless

My Kind of Woman by Mac DeMarco

girls by girl in red

Coffee by beabadoobee

Juliet by Cavetown

rises the moon by Liana Flores

Where'd All the Time Go? By Dr. Dog

cardigan by Taylor Swift

No Plan by Hozier

_______

Summer

Sleeps with the windows open

Goes to the beach at sunrise to walk along the shore

Parties until late at night and comes home in the early morning

Afraid of never being good enough

Plans their day to the second, has a set goal in life

Chatty, makes friends easily but sometimes tries too hard

Just plain gorgeous (agreed!! - *blushes*)

Constantly doing something so they doesn't have any time to wallow in their thoughts

Sees the best in people (even Autumn? - Would you knock it off!?!!)

Doesn't need anyone's approval but cares about their found family's opinion

Has always something urgent to do

Done with everyone's whining (e- even me? - no, not you - pffft, simp. - *proceeds to throw a shoe at Winter* - You asked for it.)

Always tries to be strong by repressing their emotions (yeah, you shouldn't do that - sigh, I'll try not to)

Aesthetics:

Sunshine and linen sheets, freckles and dimples, gold and sand, warm laughter and cold cocktails, strawberry lemonade, pizza and a can of soda, tan lines and stretch marks, afternoon naps on the porch and late night rides, roller skating with their headphones on the promenade, thrift-shopping, a light breeze in the summer heat

Playlist:

Juicy by Doja Cat

Chicken Noodle Soup by J-Hope (ft. Becky G)

Cool for the Summer by Demi Lovato

WANNABE by ITZY

Need to Know by Doja Cat

I'm Legit by Nicki Minaj ft. Ciara

About Damn Time by Lizzo

Levitating (ft. DaBaby) by Dua Lipa

Egoistic by Mamamoo

Next Level by aespa

Truth Hurts by Lizzo

Gashina by SUNMI

Dirty Harry by Gorillaz

_______

Autumn

Lovely and deep, like the woods they like to wander

Started planning their Halloween costume since summer

Chooses their afternoon tea depending on their mood

Likes to sit by the window and read when starts raining

Often misunderstood

Looks dark and broody but is just a cinnamon roll (a cute, little, squishy cinnamon roll!!! - sometimes I struggle to repress the urge to push you off a cliff - nah, you know you love me - who's gonna tell them? - Not me.)

Starts reading several books at the same time and switches between them

Spends long afternoons reading in coffee shops

Struggles with depression and anxiety

Cannot function without coffee in the morning

Gets startled easily if they are focused on something else

Judges everyone silently, that's just what they do (Except Spring, she can do whatever she wants. - is it the cuteness? - It is.)

Waits for the call to end and then texts "What do you want?!?"

Aesthetics:

Eye-rolls, tired eyes, old books and fallen leaves as bookmarks, sentences underlined with shaky lines, large cardigans and knitted sweaters, dark coffee with splashes of milk, Earl Grey tea and butter biscuits, soft sighs and sweater paws, leather messenger bags and worn-out notebooks, the pitter-patter of rain on the sidewalk, fog and drizzle, the distant rumble of an incoming storm

Playlist:

The Less I Know the Better by Tame Impala

Tired by beabadoobee

Devil Town by Cavetown

Coffee by Jack Stauber's Micropop

Blondie by Current Joys

Alien Blues by Vundabar

Little Dark Age by MGMT

Hey Kids by Molina ft. Late Verlane

Take a Slice by Glass Animals

Vide Noir by Lord Huron

Mary On a Cross by Ghost

The Chain by Fleetwood Mac

Zombie by The Cranberries

----------------------🍏

Helloo!!! ✨

Sorry it's been a while since I've posted anything (again, sob) but I'm back!

I chose seasons this time, and I've also added comments from each one, I thought it would be a cute thing to add, I had fun doing it.

For the character's comments I used different colors to recognize them, I hope it's not too chaotic.

Hope you enjoy, and please take care of yourselves,

lots of love 💜

#moodboard #aestethic #character aesthetics #tag your aesthetic #character concept #tag yourself #playlist #song suggestions #types of people #seasons #autumn #summer #winter #spring

[ziasann]

Seven Fun Facts with Crimen Passionis

1. The title Crimen Passionis meant “a crime of passion” in Latin.

I originally thought of this title for a Cyno/Tighnari fic last year where it also dealt the same theme of Cyno as an unjust General Mahamatra of Sumeru because of Tighnari.

Unfortunately for my Sumeru fics, I found better fitting titles so I kept that one in my treasure trove and I did not expect to use it with NeuviFuri. I did not even expect to ship NeuviFuri this BAD but here we all are.

2. The songs inspiring the fic are actually from Vocaloid’s Evillous Chronicles series.

“Cappricio Farce” and “Judgment of Corruption” are the songs I have repeatedly blasted to as I wrote the story. The lyrics from Cappricio Farce are very much in line with the overall theme of the fic.

Corrupt!Judge Neuvillette is just very hot too 😘

3. Had a lot of help around actually!

I struggled with the writing process, but my writer friends helped around. Daisy (ao3: wisforia) told me to lean on the concept of “love corrupts” with Neuvillette. Meanwhile Rika (ao3: pinkweirdsunsets) pointed out how my story is the entire opposite of the Archon Quest.

me: how to write a character going insane?

sunshine & vira: what was the reason of her madness?

me: guilt because she fell in love instead of focusing on the prophecy

My long term writer friends and beta readers Sunshine (ao3: 20fifthbaam) and Vira (ao3: Viralaine) suggested I use “distraction” to portray such guilt. The whole Fountain of Lucine scene and the narration from then on was driven from that. The date at the Opera, her platter of sweets, Neuvillette vacating the premises, all of them: a distraction.

Also fun beta reader comments!

4. Furina lessened her use of cosmetics after the merge with Focalors because her now godly constitution makes her skin and looks better!

Her palate for sweets had not lessened, but her usage of cosmetics did. — Canto IV, Acedia

5. The 23 stabs to Focalors (and 24 women Furina killed) was a reference from Julius Caesar who was betrayed and stabbed 23 times.

Here is my full response:

At this point, I think that Furina was experiencing bouts of hallucination and insanity, she even forgot she killed 24 women until Neuvillette pointed it out. Was Furina stabbing Focalors in her dreams actually Furina killing the 24 women in reality? Or was it a different illusion altogether? We can never know. Only Neuvillette might know the real answer, or Furina herself whose state of mind was not very reliable at this time. Hence the tag, "Unreliable Narrator." But while writing I had a thought too that perhaps when Furina killed Focalors in her dreams/hallucination, her body was enacting the stabs to the 24 victims of Vacher. Perhaps, she was also thinking of another thing during those episodes.

6. Writer Annotations at the Original Doc:

7. Neuvillette’s final judgment and Furina’s final performance.

While writing the scene before the insurrection, I realized that Furina was acting. She was manipulating Neuvillette to tip his judgment in favor of her. Because she promised before in Canto III that she would never cry anymore after handing out half of the Hydro Gnosis.

In the last few scenes, Furina cried before Neuvillette so that Neuvillette would indict: “The People of Fontaine made you cry, they made you lower yourself like this…Their sins will never be forgiven.”

Focalors did tell Furina:

“He promised you the world, the rain, that he would do everything for you! Once you utter the sentence, once you realize you will do everything for him too…”

Furina uttered her cries, so Neuvillette did everything for her.

[omniblades-and-stars]

Daisy's gonna get real with y'all for a minute.

I've been playing Mass Effect for a long fucking time. Since the second one came out in 2010. At the time, I was broke as fuck, living in my grandparent's basement, struggling with undiagnosed bipolar disorder.

I felt utterly powerless.

And I'm working at Gamestop part time, we got to check out games for free. I keep seeing this game, it's the second one in a series I've never heard of before. Everybody was all up Halo's ass still (no shade to Halo). But it's a sci-fi adventure with cool aliens in it.

I boot it up on my Xbox and create my character. She looks kind of like me, but I can't get the nose quite right, but that's okay.

And as I play, making all kinds of mistakes, I'm sure, I realize, people know her. They missed her. There's this pilot, he's kind of an asshole, but in the same way some of my friends are loveable assholes.

There's the doctor, and her laughter is so kind, it felt healing. Also, she's kind of hot. And funny.

I immediately go to get Archangel because that guy sounds rad as fuck from the dossier. And when he greets me, I just know, THIS, this is your ride or die friend. It's apparent in the banter. Like "Haha you jackass I love you." Kind of friends.

And it just keeps going. I feel less alone.

But as I'm playing as this incredible, powerful woman, I realize something else.

I feel powerful too. Or at least, I don't feel powerless. And that counts.

And I keep pushing through, even though life is awful. And it gets worse.

Surprise! Daisy, you're pregnant! Oh and look at that, it's twins!

I'm still broke as fuck, living in my grandparent's basement. My husband and I have been trying for years to find better jobs, but there's nothing but shitty part time, minimum wage work. The recession is technically over, but those of thrust into adulthood during those years know the truth.

In some way, it never ended.

It's 2012, after the Extended Cut for 3 is released, and I'm doing bad. It turns out undiagnosed and untreated bipolar disorder mix with post-partum depression about as well as bleach and ammonia.

My babies never sleep, so I don't either. I gave up on going to work. My husband has to work all the time when I'm awake so we can afford to live in our shitty apartment where someone was shot in the parking lot right outside my window. So I almost never see him.

Suicide is on my mind.

I feel alone.

I feel powerless.

My husband spent the money to buy me Mass Effect 3 for my birthday. And I boot it up.

There are all my friends! Hey guys, the world's kind of gone to shit, huh? I feel you, my world's gone to shit too.

I devour it.

I get to the end, and there's an option I didn't expect.

Synthesis.

And as EDI's dialogue cuts in for the epilogue, I'm already weeping because oh shit Shepard just died. But then EDI says, "I am alive, and I am not alone."

And all of the air leaves my lungs. I'm ugly crying at this point, alone in my living room, hunched over with snot all over my face and hands.

Because she's right.

I am alive. And I'm not alone.

My sweet, beautiful children are sleeping (for once) just in the other room. My husband is working himself literally to the bone because he loves us so much, he's not going to let us become homeless if he can help it. My aunt came by to surprise me and take me out to lunch for my birthday.

She didn't even know I had been contemplating taking my own life that morning.

I'm not alone. Sure, shit sucks. I've been destitute my entire adult life, I'm a college drop out, I haven't slept in months, we can barely make rent, my body is different now and I don't like it, but I'm still here.

Now, it's 2023.

And I'm still here.

#mass effect #n7 day #super personal #but i wanted to share #tw: suicidal ideation

[lycanlovingvampyre]

MAG 117 Relisten

Activity on my first listen: Baking something with apples

An episode full of thoughts. That's gonna be a long one...

JON: "Daisy’s been pretty clear that she thinks the best chance of success would be for her to go in alone, and, honestly, I struggle to disagree. But Tim isn’t going to sit home and wait, and Elias seems pretty insistent I go along. Part of me thinks it’s just so he can see if whatever this “preparation” he’s been trying to do on me works." Aw man, sounds like he is really afraid of this. I mean, firstly, he'll be returning to the place where he was already hurt, when the Circus kidnapped him for their skin care before flaying seminar. In general the Stranger has done enough to scare him even before that, Not!Sasha, Nikola visiting him. And then of course, the operation itself is dangerous. Of course Elias is insistent for him to go along. But not for the reasons Jon thinks he is.

JON: "You know what? That same petty little part of me rather hopes it doesn’t. That all this time, all his cryptic nudges and “learn to fly by falling” attitude, ends up being a complete waste of time. Just to show him." I wonder if this ended up to be a conflict in his coma. He knows, that Elias is planning something for him, he doesn't know what exactly that is, but that it's probably not good. (But probably also not the scale of this not good.) But at the other hand he wants to protect the others? Also, the instinct to survive is usually a pretty strong one.

JON: "I think Basira is the same. She’s coming along to back up Daisy, or so she says. I don’t quite get those two. I suppose what they’ve done, seeing what they’ve seen… it’s a hell of a bond. The sort of thing I’ve mostly done alone." I wonder if seeing the dynamic those two have with each other got him to make the decision to trust the others and wanting to support them more. Shared trauma can forge these strong bonds. It's a survival mechanism. In the end, I think for Jon and Martin it was not just that though. I mean, surely it helped. But Jon made that character development a lot of the time alone. And through all his hardships, where the others abandoned him, even despised him, Martin always came back to him and stood with him. Even when Jon still "hated" Martin, he did care for him (see MAG 22, MAG 40) and already opened up to him (MAG 39). How could he not have seen this in Martin. Jon may not be the friendliest of persons, but he sure is a kind one.

JON: "If I am, uh, slipping then I need people I can trust. And I… I don’t think that can happen naturally for me an-anymore" I can so relate to that...

JON: "If I am, uh, slipping then I need people I can trust. And I… I don’t think that can happen naturally for me an-anymore. how much they’ve… suffered because of this place. Because of me. God. Poor Melanie. And… aside from some, uh, uh, office gossip which I, I’m not sure is necessary or, uh, conducive to a workplace that… hey, it, it, it’s natural it’s, it’s normal. There’s, there’s no there’s no sinister hidden motives or… it’s fine. It, it’s fine." Oh he listened to that tape with the Jan Kilbride statement! Elias torturing Melanie happened on the same day and he addresses that. I'd just like to know, when this happened. Somewhere between Gertrude's storage unit and now. Also, he has now successfully internalized the guilt that is not his to bare.

JON: "I do worry about Martin and Melanie." Even though Jon and Melanie had plenty of arguments he does worry for her! That's what I meant earlier.

BASIRA: "But I think sometimes you feel like you’re adapting, but it’s just denial." Very well said. And then it's just a matter of stamina, how long you can keep up this denial before breaking, or actual change.

BASIRA: "But, she’s solid. She’s a… a fixed point, and if she’s there, I know exactly where I stand, exactly what I’m doing, relative to her." This is important for their relationship post coffin. I've seen Blackbeard and Izzy's relationship (Our Flag Means Death) being compared to Daisy and Basira.

BASIRA: "The sort of bad you can only get through if you stay focused and keep a clear head. You choke down the fear – and not because it’s feeding some weird horrible god, like Jon thinks, but because that’s how you keep going." Except for the choking down the fear I agree!

MELANIE: "They think they’re giving me a chance to face my demons by helping to take down Elias. They don’t get that the only way to deal with something like him is to watch his eyes go dead with your hands around his throat. I’ll play it their way, for now, but when it comes down to it, I want to see him dead. I, I’m so angry just sometimes, when Jon’s going off on one about his latest insight, it’s all I can do not to punch him in the teeth." When I was first listening I absolutely did not understand where this lust for murder and violence was coming from. Especially not for Jon because she asked him for access to the library and he literally wasn't there when she took the job. Of course, it makes so much sense in S4!

The "arsehole" in the fan transcript is missing, keeping it pg? xD

MELANIE: "Said I’d been mugged, although the scans couldn’t find anything in there." But of course they wouldn’t see the bullet... because of all the artifacts! (diagnostic imaging pun, *badum tss*)

MARTIN: "I, I’m scared, I guess. – no, wait. No, no, I mean, aww, I don’t want that to be my last message, the thing that defines me. 'Martin Blackwood, he was always scared, then he died. The end.' I don’t want that." That hit me pretty hard, not gonna lie.

MARTIN: "I need them to be safe, I need him to be okay." One of the most famous Martin lines.

MARTIN: "This last couple of years, I’ve always been running, always hiding, caught in someone else’s trap, but, but now it’s my trap, and, well, I think it’ll work. I know, I know it’s not exactly intricate, but it felt good leaving my own little web. Oh, oh, Christ, I hope Jon doesn’t actually listen to these. 'Good lord, is Martin becoming some sort of spider person?' No, Jon, it’s an expression, chill out! Besides, spiders are fine. I mean, yes, people are scared of them, obviously, but actual spiders, they just want to help you out with flies." Web!Martin! Even if he denies it xD But also, actual spiders don't want to help you out with flies either. They just want prey to eat. And watching me sleep it seems! God that fucking spider sitting on my shoulder watching me sleep...

MARTIN: "Just… just don’t die, Jon… Or, or Tim, Basira, or… Daisy, I guess?" This is just fan service again here!

[SIGH, CLATTERING SOUNDS] DAISY: "Okay." Best! xD Seriously, this was really funny. Daisy just cocking her gun and being like "That's it. That's all I have to say".

TIM: "Just, if you’re there, I want you to know that I hate you. I hate you for, for witnessing what’s happened to us." Right in the face of the audience!

TIM: "Talk to the wrong person, take the wrong train, open the wrong door, and that’s it!" Oof, that door thing... But ultimately, it's the same in real life. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. Awful things happen to good people. Awful things happen to bad people.

TIM: "And if he needs to pull the trigger, to use me to stop it… well, he’d better have the guts to do it." Very short-lived foreshadowing.

JON: "Gerry. I-I know there’s more he could tell me – he he, wouldn’t of, of course, I, I know that but he, he… he would still be there, th-that, that knowledge, i-it would, it would still exist…" How very Beholding of him-

JON: "Come on. On tape, just, just, just do it! Do it!!" -but he's better than that.

Wonder, if it was meant to hurt anybody who tries to destroy a page of the Catalogue. Or if it's worse for Eye-aligned.

@a-mag-a-day

#a-mag-a-day #mag 117 #tma #tma spoilers

[andreabaideas]

Characters I relate to , more complete list and also why i relate to each one of them

Well, when i say that i relate to a character, It doesnt mean were the same 100%, But that we have many things in common.

The ones i did write in another post had this ones :

Luna Lovegood.

Karen Sirko

Daisy Jones

Maddie Buckley

Eddie Munson

Temperance Brennan.

Im also adding Wednesday Addams , Bella Swan , Hermione Granger and Ángela Weber.

1- Luna Lovegood: I relate to her weirdness, her curiosity, her calm and her close relationship with her dad (in my case dad and mom). Also the feeling that you are different and you embrace it.

2 - Karen Sirko: dont give a damn chill attitude, sarcasm, independence especially with males and her feminism.

3- Daisy Jones: Her artistic side, especially the Creative writing struggles, her Desire to create art, her boho Style, I adore her clothes, my summer wardrobe Its heavily inspired in her style. The feeling that you are different, her sarcasm and cheeky humor sense, Its totally me.

Also her relationship with Gary (the writer with glasses and curly hair) he reminds me to my ex (physically and in personality) for real, It was very creepy, to add creepiness just like with Daisy, he never took me seriously neither...And thats why i dumped him too. I learned a lot from It...tbh

4- Maddie Buckley: her softness, her insecurity and how she became more sure of herself its just like 18-20 years old me, tbh.

5- Eddie Munson: teen years, the dont belonging, being underseen by other teens, the sarcasm and humor sense too.

6- Temperance Brennan : her brutal logic and her lack of filter Its me, totally and completely me. I have to be very carefully, because I may be too sincere and rude.

7- Wednesday Addams : enjoying creeping out others with my sarcasm, liking Dark things sometimes, not very social, very close to my family, more than i admit out loud.

8- Bella Swan : Not belonging feeling, likes a lot to read, caring for family, hopeless romantic, weird and sarcastic. I also hate Cold weather.

9- Hermione Granger: smartness, ocd when studying, being feed Up with silly people, read to solve my problems. Always wants to know more.

10- Ángela Weber: nice, usually quiet, people tend to like superficially without knowing me, I like photography and I dont like to gossip. I try to intégrate be nice to new people in groups (like she did with Bella).

Thats It! Have a nice day!! ☺️😊👋.

#me #about me #characters #ideas

[chaoticpinetree]

I CANNOT WITH THE SEASON 3 ENDING

Okay first of all that episode with everyone's statements before they left was actually pretty cool, two things I found funny is that Daisy just noped out and also that Martin, ohhhhhhh ohhhh his part was so cool because because the thing is.

If a character in any media (book, movie, series, and well, podcast, anything) explains a plan, that plan is likely to fail. If a character does not explain a plan, that plan is likely to succeed. And this knowledge, this... Does not really let me ever watch/read a scene of characters planning anything without being aware of this unwritten rule. And, well, the reason why it's like that is simple: if a plan works, then explaining it beforehand would sort of spoil the surprise and the thrill of waiting to see what exactly the characters are gonna do. So explaining a plan and then watching the characters do exactly that would be boring. And not explaining a plan and having it fail would be confusing and probably also boring because we wouldn't even know where exactly it failed, right?

So the thing is, I found it quite worrying that we knew quite a lot about what the team was going to do to the Unknowing BUT what I found super exciting is that Martin didn't explain his plan and it was very cool.

AND THEN THEN THEN THEN we saw his plan it was cool, it was simple, but actually so effective. Like his only goal was to waste Elias's time but to do that he needed to do something Elias would find worth paying attention to—hence burning the statements. It would be much harder to waste Elias's time with small talk over tea I guess.

"I can't hear you. There's a door in the way." Akjhgdhkjhgdhjhgdhjhgd 10/10

What I find funny is that Elias underestimated Martin to the point where he literally said out loud that he didn't look. Amazing. But also let me tell you, those issues he pulled to the surface, with Martin's mother hating him? Oh damn that's. That hit hard.

I think I was more excited for Martin's plan and then the nightmares' descriptions and the arrest of Elias than for stopping of an actual apocalypse.

But the Unknowing was interesting too, like, the way it was clear that they struggled with thinking, the way Basira had to tell herself out loud 'I am me, there are others that aren't me and this is a place' and all that, that was neat. And then just. Explosion.

And I think that there was something sad but also angstily sad about Tim's 'I don't forgive you. But thank you for this.' Just :C

AND THEN THE LAST EPISODE. AND OH MY GOD ELIAS'S DESCRIPTION OF JON'S NIGHTMARES AJHFGHDGFDGHJHGD

It's like. I tried to ramble to my friends about it but I just. Failed. Because you know it's not only what it's about but also the way they're described that create that unnatural atmosphere. The way he watches every single statement, with the statement givers filled with either fear, scared of Jon, others angry, blaming him for the nightmares, that's so, ahhhhh I don't even have the words.

So like. People give him statements. And it's been established already that he needs their statements to survive. And if the statements are taken live, if a person tells their statement directly to him, it gives both the statement giver and Jon nightmares. Which is incredibly interesting. What's also interesting is what Elias said, that Jon wants to wake up, he's waiting for it, but he's not waking. His mind is alive and so he dreams and wants to awaken but his body is dead and so he has nowhere to awaken to and it's so interesting and dark and also damn. And especially the ending of the description of the nightmare, of him falling into the eye, that suggests some shady stuff happening there.

And I just have. Feelings. Regarding the end of this season. Just ;-;

I loved it so much ;-;

#tma #tma reactions #the magnus archives #mag 117 #mag 118 #mag 119 #mag 120

[xiexiecaptain]

Shadow & Bone rewatch live-commenting that was started on twitter and is being moved/continued here!

This is the post for EP 03: The Making at the Heart of the World

[Episode 01 post] [Rewatch Commentary Links Masterpost]

((There WILL be spoilers mentioned for the books in the Grishaverse including the Crows duology & King of Scars duology! This is basically from the perspective of watching the show as someone who knows the books well.))

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I like that we're getting to hear her letters to Mal in voice over because it returns some of the interiority we've lost through the translation from 1st person narrative to screen 

bUT immediately my brain supplied the hilarious AU that Mal runs one of those Dear Abby advice columns

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*sob laughs in Book 2*

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GENYA!!! SHE'S HERE!

God I love Genya 

And the way Daisy Head carries herself here, the polished demeanor, all of it is so Genya

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This was such a great moment between them 

And even though Genya had to do what she does later on, you can tell she's really earnest about how quickly she warms to Alina

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THESE TWO BICKER LIKE AN OLD MARRIED COUPLE AND IM LIVING FOR IT

["Good to know Van Eck didn't cure you of sentiment."

"Glad to be back, Kaz."]

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SHE'S HERE, THE GLORIOUS, THE INCOMPERABLE NINA ZENIK

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Lmao right "despises" 

As in "the two people I'll fall in love with in my life will both be Fjerdans"

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That fight scene !!!!!!!

What a fckin badass I absolutely adore Nina 

Everyone needs a Nina Zenik in their life tbh

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This is the SECOND time I've noticed Jesper randomly helping himself to food/drink from other people's tables/houses and I fucking love it (he also did it in Dreesen’s basement)

Kit Young is a gift

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Wraith mode: activated

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The way his gaze lingers and he stays turned toward the window for a solid few seconds after she's gone-!!!

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He tries to stop himself, he really does!!! 

Can we just appreciate in general the nuanced and compassionate, yet realistic way addiction is portrayed with Jesper's character???

(Not to mention the fact we see TWO portrayals of addiction in this series--psychological addiction with Jesper and physical addiction with Nina) 

Like, it's not a comic relief bit--it legitimately has life-altering consequences for both Jesper, all his loved ones, and those he works with. 

We see Jesper both deny to himself and others he has a Problem, yet also struggle against it 

["Why didn't you just stop?" Jesper wanted to laugh. He had pleaded with himself, screamed at himself to stop.]

He fucks up and hurts people he (and we the readers) love because of it. Yet the narrative remains continuous in its portrayal of Jesper as someone with steadfastly good intentions and a good heart who is struggling with unhealed issues

["There's a wound in you, and the tables, the dice, the cards--they feel like medicine. They soothe you, for a time. But they're poison, Jesper."] 

 Listen, I just have a lot of Feelings about Jesper Fahey

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Alina Starkov is truly a woman of the people

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SA mention////

"Ah, our shitty monarchs: The rapist king, the queen whose focus on appearance trumps any real issues, and the vapid entitled weasel of a prince. The only decent one among them, I've disguised so he could go play pirate to help Ravka by doing Ocean Crimes."

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Yes, I hate him 

Yes, he is occasionally funny

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Yeah this was fckin shitty of her and I’m definitely not excusing it ever

But its interesting seeing this understanding where it’s coming from re: Zoya’s heritage.

Zoya's got so much internalized racism and fear around being mixed race herself because of her upbringing, seeing how not only just her father was treated but Suli in general

She's lashing out because she's afraid and conflicted

And she's also feeling jealous and uncertain about her place being favored by the Darkling (which he has fostered because he's a manipulator of the worst kind)

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Kaz carrying Milo the goat and looking absolutely Done will never not be funny to me

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More show-added worldbuilding appreciation from me

The posters styled after Bolshevik revolution/soviet propaganda posters is such a wonderful touch by the props/set folks 

And again, the invented script for written Ravkan (and all the languages, but we’ve mostly just seen Ravkan and Kerch written so far) makes my linguist nerd heart sing

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Kaz: initiate mastermind scanners for useful information and/or potential blackmail

Kaz: BEEP BEEP impending betrayal detected 

Kaz: initiate 5-D chess-level planning consisting of labyrinthine layers upon layers of traps, feints, and manipulation

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I love that they gave her a physical object for Inej related to her family.

In the books (again, because of interiority) we get literal flashbacks of them, as well as many phrases from her parents she repeats or hears internally ("The heart is an arrow...", "Climb, Inej")

But that’s not easily translated to a visual medium. So instead we get this great little physical/visual token of that. 

It does such heavy lifting not only in that it shows us how deeply Inej's faith directs her morals (like how torn she was when Arken connected over their faith), but also shows how much she still holds the memory/hope of her family close to her; that she's never accepted that her life in Ketterdam was just it now.

 Good, good storytelling work

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ARE YOU TALKING TO HER OR TO YOURSELF, KAZ?????? 

That little glance down and then away-!!!

And then immediately he's harsh and cruel about it to try and push her away from him--to push hIMSELF away from her!!! 

Fucking helllll

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 I'm so glad they basically got to keep Nina's and Matthias' story the same (aside from minor details obv) down to exact lines 

Danielle Galligan and Calahan Skogman breathe such life into the cores of these characters and all their nuances

[Matthias had always fought his own decency. To become a drüskelle, he’d had to kill the good things inside him.]

 All through this episode, even in this first scene, you can see Nina's words start to scratch away at him

He's gonna have her in his head for the rest of the night

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Jesper Fahey, everyone

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LOVE THE WHOLE CONCEPT! 

Love this addition to the world, love how it's not finished/is kinda ramshackle with sliding between the two tracks, love the weird systems set up he's developed to cross multiple times with the sound of hitting the metal, love it all

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I'm so happy Nadia is a black woman!!! 

We get so many queer characters of color! I can't wait until we get Tamar (and Tolya ofc) introduced in the show so we can have the badass wlw couple we deserve

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BOTKIN!! So glad he makes an appearance!! 

I could so easily him being cut from another version of an adaption so this makes me so happy

Part of what endeared Botkin to me in the book was how, even though he is a harsh teacher, he always treated Alina like every other student and demanded her best work 

Like "idc you're the sun summoner, your right hook is pathetic!"

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ALINA KNOWING HOW TO THROW A PROPER PUNCH BC MAL TAUGHT HER IS 🙏🙏🙏

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Like I know this is supposed to establish character dynamics and how Zoya has this social position she's defending and how Alina is gaining credibility 

But me & my gay-ass brain just went like "Ok but I would let Zoya punch me in the face and I would say THANK YOU"

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If only I were so lucky 😔💦

Somewhere, King of Scars!Nikolai getting shackled to his bed by Zoya every night for his own safety just liked this^^^ as a tweet

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See, Nadia gets me 

She's pickin' up what I'm puttin' down

This also establishes Nadia’s type is women who can knock your lights out and smirk, which is good news for future Tamar

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And we here see in Alina's face the echoed experiences of women, femmes, and assumed-women everywhere having forced unwanted interactions with creepy dudes

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Zoë Wanamaker is soooooo good as Baghra, hot damn 

A fellow Zoë out there making us proud

Another character I can’t wait to see interact with Nikolai on screen because their relationship is hilarious to me

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I've mentioned it before, but the show more heavily leaning into the idea that Grisha power can sort of be drawn out or kicked on by sudden pain and/or fear is such an interesting one

Because it implies about the nature of Grisha power that it developed similar to other unconscious survival mechanisms--like adrenaline numbs out bad injuries or allows muscles to surpass normal limits, its something that helps keep Grisha stay alive in a life or death situation

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"I WISH I WERE WITH Y- ...WITH THE FIRST ARMY" 

I'M-!!!!!

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SEE? THIS IS THE SHIT I LOVE 

The worldbuilding always contains all these tiny details that realistically reflect how humans build clever systems over time to address issues and get what/where they want to

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Alina's fuckign face-

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I CANT GET OVER THIS 

Yes, the emotional support goat was Absolutely Mission Critical

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I'M FUCKIN EMOTIONAL BC I just noticed when Arken says the situation is dire, please take note of how Kaz isn't even looking at him, he's staring diRECTLY AT INEJ sitting across from him?????

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[That sound--the swift, shocking report of gunfire--called the scattered, irascible, permanently seeking part of his mind into focus like nothing else.]

[...Jesper could feel himself coming alive, the worry that had been dogging his steps ... falling away. He felt free, dangerous, like lightning rolling over the prairie.]

[He'd knew his guns better than he knew the rules of Makker's Wheel. Jesper focused on the bullet, sensed the smallest parts of it. Maybe he was the same. A bullet in a chamber, spending his whole life waiting for the moment he would have direction.]

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So I just want to examine the Crows' "we were pretty sure we were going to die but we actually pulled through and are somehow still alive???" reactions for a minute:

1) Inej, ofc, her first reaction is prayer which makes me emotional 

And then, she looks over at Kaz because she wants to see if this finally shook something loose from that cold exterior (because tbh, at this point, it's probably the first time she's ever witnessed Kaz escape death first-hand)

2)  How fucking beautiful Jesper looks?? 😍😍

[Jesper's hair was mussed, his pupils dilated. He seemed almost drunk, or like he’d just rolled out of someone’s bed. He always had that look after a fight.]

3) And Kaz, of course as always, is looking at Inej (and then looking away from it all) 

It's gonna get you in big trouble one day, Kaz

AND how Inej and Kaz hold eye contact for a moment before they both look away???

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And I feel Malina in this chili's tonight

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Oh! Something I forgot to add I noticed during the train fight scene, Arken has these depictions of saints hung up on the walls!!!! 

Again, major major ups to the prop/set people for adding all these small details!! It makes the world feel so full and lived in!

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So that's the end of episode 3! 

Wheee I fuckin' love the Grishaverse and my beloved Crows and we're so lucky to have this cast

[Rewatch Commentary Links Masterpost]

#shadow and bone #shadow and bone netflix #six of crows #alina starkov #mal oretsev #kaz brekker #inej ghafa #jesper fahey #genya safin #nina zenik #matthias helvar #zoya nazyalensky