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marshmallowprotection · 11 months

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Hang ‘Em High

Pairing: Saeyoung Choi/Judas [Male CMC] Description: Saeyoung's mind wanders as Judas' hands wander. The fire he feels is something he never wants to be extinguished. It's a damn good thing his boyfriend wants to burn alongside him. Word Count: 2306 [Read on AO3]

“I’m starting to think you might be more enraptured with me than you want to admit,” those haughty words came as a taunt from Judas’ lips like a discordant melody. “It wouldn’t be a first for me. You just wouldn’t believe how many men I’ve seduced over the years after they decided to hold me captive. Of course, I got rid of them in the end… but you, oh, Saeyoung. You’re the lucky one.”

The trickle of his boyfriend’s chuckle made his spine quiver. Saeyoung wasn’t the type to let go of control or inhibitions, but if there was one person in this world who’d proven himself more than capable of getting under his skin—it was Judas. It was his target-turned-ally-turned-lover who knew the ins and outs of his body like it was a piano he played for years.

Judas knew what it was like to be tortured, maimed, and left for dead just as well as he did.

That was why it was so easy to look him in the eye and blow off some steam. After all, that was how it started in the first place. Gnashing teeth, wandering hands, and wild eyes in the middle of the makeshift interrogation room Saeyoung set up in his bunker.

It all melted in nothingness… nothing but a burning desire that brought him conflict, unlike anything he’d ever encountered. He never felt anything like that before and he wasn't sure he would ever feel anything like that again. Judas was the only person who ever made him feel it. That desire… that yearning… that fire… the kind of selfish dream that a Priest would make him sit in confession for until he admitted everything he wanted to do… and have done to him.

Judas was the only person to ever make him want to bite something just as much as he wanted to be bitten in return. It was different with their girlfriend, Minji. When Saeyoung was by her side, it was like he was blanketed with a buff of flour and cinnamon. She was a gentle fire right when he needed one in the dead of winter. She made him want to survive another night even if the world outside of her warmth was cruel and unforgiving. What she gave him was… the hope he never had.

But, Judas?

What he felt when he was with him wasn’t like the cinnamon and honey he tasted when he was in the kitchen with Minji. Oh, no. It was a different desire altogether, and if he were to put it in mere words, no word could ever come close to what he needed to say. It wasn’t the sensation of wanting to hold someone all night long with a tender look burning in your eyes. It… was much more akin to an insatiable hunger for more. If he was a glutton for anything, it was what he felt whenever he kissed Judas in the heat of the moment.

Saeyoung wasn’t supposed to want anything like that. Hell, he wasn’t supposed to be loved or love another person because of the sacrifices he made as a child to do what he thought was the best thing at the time. Even now, to this day, there was a part of him that couldn’t believe he’d not only been given the freedom he wanted for his brother, much less that he was in love with two people who loved him just as much as he loved them. It almost didn't seem… fair in some ways.

How could the world give him desire and yearning when he never wanted to let himself taste the apple in the Garden of Eden in the first place? Was he even worthy of such a thing, anyway? Sure, he made sacrifices, but he did so knowing he would forever taint his soul with damnation. Was it okay for him to receive and give the very thing… he took away from others? That was the kind of thinking no amount of therapy could make better for him.

Even as he was trying to get better, that thought always lingered.

It would be a part of him for the rest of his life no matter how far he got away from the living hell he experienced. Saeyoung knew that like the back of his hand.

But, when Judas looked at him, with that cocky smile and those come hither eyes—

Saeyoung cracked under pressure and he couldn’t say he regretted it now. Back then, though, Vanderwood would’ve killed the two of them and moved on to his next assignment without a second thought. It was the thrill of something dangerous that spurned him to act. Saeyoung… had never been a selfish person in his life. He always acted with the thought that his twin had to have everything first. If there were scraps left, he would take them.

He never took anything because he wasn’t allowed anything. He wouldn’t ever allow himself to want anything. Judas tested that mentality, though. His tongue dipping out between his lips as he spoke tempted him in ways he never had to fight before. His desire for Judas had been there from the start. The urge to act on it, however, had been what he had to fight.

For somebody who never let himself have anything, it was harder to hold himself back than it should have been. That was the influence Judas possessed over him. That was the power of his sharp blue eyes and wavy black curls. It wasn’t just a game. They called it a game for a while to avoid putting a label on what they were doing, but they both knew better than that. Even with the experience Judas had over him by the chance of being born just three years before him—the reality was undeniable—they had become intertwined before they knew how to stop. Judas would pull his hand, let his hand linger against Saeyoung’s shoulders, whisper in his ears so close that his lips would brush against the shell of his ear, and spurn Saeyoung to corner him when their interrogation process got them nowhere. If Vanderwood had been in the room, the process would’ve been more streamlined. But, Vanderwood hadn’t been there most of the time and Saeyoung had to delegate the process by himself.

But… it wasn’t like Saeyoung didn’t push back when they were stuck in that small room. There were no lies he could tell about what he did to avoid Judas’ advances. He never avoided them to begin with. He reciprocated every single one. He played into Judas’ hands just as much as Judas played into his.

He would pin Judas against the wall with vicious words that only seemed to be just enough to entice him to play, let his eyes linger in all the perfect places, and his guiltiest action—how he never stopped himself from letting his hand rest against Judas’ hip the second the man took a seat on his lap to watch the CCTV footage as they unraveled the mystery of who lured Minji into Rika’s apartment.

If anything, they were both guilty of playing a dangerous game that wasn’t at all a game. They knew better than to play with fire, but they danced right into it. Judas knew they were going to kill him when they got everything the agency wanted, and Saeyoung knew it was his job to get rid of him when that day came. In reality, they should have been at odds with each other until the bitter end.

But, as fate would have it, they leap into the flames they knew like the back of their hands like it was something they were destined to do. Saeyoung let Judas in at his most vulnerable moment and Judas didn’t take advantage of him. He drew him in and gave him a reason to survive and see the next day in a way that Minji just— couldn’t. It wasn’t that she wasn’t good enough for that. She was perfect.

Her gentle reassurance gave him back the wings he lost when he accepted the agency’s deal, and Judas’ hands grounded him from getting swept away into the stars.

The fact of the matter was—Saeyoung realized he needed them both to become himself again. He was just so damn lucky that they loved each other just as much as they loved him. To think that never would’ve been possible had he not given into temptation… to the desire in his loins that beckoned him to take more, more, more, more, and more.

Saeyoung’s orders had been clear about how to handle the informant his agency had taken in for intel.

He and Vanderwood were supposed to let him think he was safe until he spilled the beans on what he had on the human trafficking ring that was run by his former lover. It was the deal of the century. The agency got what they wanted and they didn’t have to go underground to get it. They only had to use one man to get years of work.

Once they had everything he had, Judas was supposed to be disposed of. He wasn’t supposed to live beyond that. He was supposed to have been killed years ago. Yet, here he was, as alive as he could be with his chest pressed against Saeyoung’s back and his hands around his waist as if they were always meant to be there. Nobody would ever have Saeyoung the way he did… if only because Judas was the person who Saeyoung would allow to stand behind him.

The agency could’ve never expected what happened between the two of them, though. None of them would have ever accounted for how easily the two of them worked together. It was almost like they were meant to be a dynamic duo. If they’d been the ones partnered by the agency at the start… Well, Saeyoung knew the underground wouldn’t have lasted for very long. Everything in their way would have been eviscerated.

The agency had created its undoing by putting the two of them together in the end. They were the ones who destroyed everything. He and Judas were meant to be nothing more than a couple of pawns… spare pieces that could be traded away for a King… but, they proved to them that pawns were more than what they seemed.

It was funny in a way, to think he would allow somebody who could easily kill him in a matter of seconds behind his back. He was always paranoid that someone or something would get the slip on him… to the point where he would never let anyone get behind him. He wouldn’t even let Minji stand behind him unless someone had a gun pointed at her and he needed to become a human shield. It was nothing against his trust in her care.

Saeyoung just couldn’t leave his back exposed.

Not just to anybody, anyway.

Judas was the only one who could stand behind him without a single complaint. He knew his boyfriend would guard his back. If anybody so much as tried to do anything, Judas would end it for him. That was the dynamic of their bond. It was something he could only give to another person who knew what he was like in his visceral state of fear and anger. It was a brand of trust he could only give someone who would be willing to kill him or be killed by him if something ever went wrong.

He could only entrust that position to Judas.

“I’m the lucky one?” Saeyoung leaned against him, lifting his hand to grasp at Judas’ hair so he could pull at the strands and catch a glimpse of his knowing gaze. “I seem to recall otherwise… I think you’re sorely mistaken, again. You seem to forget just how small you are… and how easy it was for my hands to wrap around your throat back when you threatened me.”

“Oh, you just hate to admit you want someone like me to dominate you,” the response flowed off of Judas’ tongue like it was nothing. He leaned into the pressure from Saeyoung’s digits on his scalp. His hands were hovering dangerously close to the space between his hips. “You know, I wanted you to pin me down, sweetheart. That’s why you did. You know as well as I do that I could give you exactly what you want… as long as your pride will let you admit how much you want to be coddled.”

“Try me,” he hissed.

“Oh, I’d love to try you… again and again.” Judas brushed his lips against the side of Saeyoung’s throat. He seemed proud of himself. He was always proud of himself when he got his way. The same way he inspired Saeyoung to be. “Isn’t that what we always do, darling? You push me and I push you? Until we fall together into the fiery pits of the Hell that you believe in… until Minji comes down to whisk us away to Heaven where neither of us truly belongs but… goddamn, if it doesn’t feel good to be in the sun.”

Saeyoung inhaled, sharply. It was the same thing over and over again but he would never have enough of this. There would never be enough of this. He was always going to want more and more and more. One taste was never enough. Saeyoung would never be satisfied and Judas was more than willing to feed into his gluttony by opening the palm of his hand and letting him eat his fill forever and ever.

Here they were again, playing a dangerous game, but they both knew what the outcome would be in the end.

“Kiss me.”

“I thought you’d never beg.”

[Art Reference: @/Half_A_Genius_]

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the-enby-with-the-fox-ears · 3 years

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We’re parents now.....

They can’t believe it but they’re also so stoked to have a kid at the same time.

They’d do anything for their daughter to make sure she grows up safe

#mystic messenger #707 #mystic messenger custom mc #custom mc #707 x custom mc #saeyoung choi #luciel choi #areum yi #haneul choi

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cherusake-art · 5 years

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Group hug around Jaehee!

Decided to kill two birds with one stone!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KANG JAEHEE!!!

Jumin thinks it’s inappropriate to hug his employee but he’s still there!

I’m still taking ask requests! Send me one! Or two, Or a bunch! I pick and choose what I’d like to draw, but you might just see yours! ^^

For @missmysme - I can totally draw another kiss, too if you’d like!

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈Art by Cheru ~ Don’t forget to follow! ♡Pls don’t repost, quote RT, or alter my art. Share the original instead!

#mystic messenger #mysmes #mysme #jaehee kang #jihyun kim #v #saeyoung choi #luciel choi #707 #yoosung kim #jumin han #zen #hyun ryu #mc chelsey #custom mc #chelsey x jaehee #my art #sake

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inactiverosigribouilli · 6 years

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What if we switch roles this time ? 😚💋💕

[PS: tbh I won’t be able to post new drawings as often as I used to 😩 I’m too busy with work these days and it’s gonna last few months 😭 Don’t worry I won’t stop ofc, I actually can’t live without drawing lol. I hope you’ll be patient 😔❤]

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jozstankovich · 5 years

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OTP Ask #7 for Ji-ae x Saeyoung please ^^

7. Write a ~300 word love scene for them.

Saeyoung didn’t know what had awakened him so early, but he was suddenly wide awake and very aware of the warm body snuggled up next to him. His bedroom was still dark, but traces of sunlight were beginning to filter through the short block windows high up the wall, illuminating the room enough for him to make out the still form of his sleeping girlfriend; her arm draped across his bare chest and her face nuzzled against his shoulder.

Ji-ae’s messy bun tickled his skin as she breathed softly and Saeyoung smiled as he watched her — the peacefulness of the moment so different from her enthusiasm a couple of hours ago, leaving her completely worn out. This was the first night they’d gotten to spend together since the events at Mint Eye and Ji-ae had seemed determined to make up for the time they’d spent apart during Saeran’s recovery.

Shifting so that he could wrap his arms around her, Saeyoung tried not to wake her, wanting to watch her a while longer. Despite everything they’d been through she had stayed by his side, even when he’d pushed her away and put her in danger. Even when he’d been preoccupied with Saeran’s treatment and couldn’t see her much, she had been there for him. Now he could finally make it up to her.

With Da-ye’s help and all the drugs now out of his system Saeran was out of the hospital and making progress and Saeyoung was finally free of the Agency… finally free to make his own decisions. And there was one thing he’d already decided.

Lying there with Ji-ae in his arms, feeling safe and completely at ease only solidified his choice. He was going to ask her to marry him.

Even though they hadn’t been together long, Saeyoung had never been more sure of anything in his life. Now all he had to do was decide how to propose. As his thoughts flit between several grand proposal schemes Ji-ae shifted in his arms, halting his planning.

“Mhmmhow long have you been awake Saeyoung?” she asked, trying to stifle a yawn halfway through his name, and failed.

“Not long,” he replied, grinning at how cute she was when she was sleepy.

“What are you doing?” She seemed to give up on trying to keep her eyes open, instead, snuggling closer.

“Just thinking about things,” Saeyoung answered cryptically, gently pushing her long bangs aside and letting his fingers trail down her cheek.

“What sort of things?” Ji-ae pressed, leaning into his touch.

Saeyoung hummed thoughtfully, pausing to press a lingering kiss to her forehead. “Just how much I like sleeping next to you… aaaaaand all the fun things we did before that,” he teased.

Ji-ae’s eyes flew open as her face flared. “I… I could get used to… doing more of… that,” she stuttered, avoiding Saeyoung’s eyes.

“Oh really?” he asked with a chuckle. “Maybe you should…”

At his words Ji-ae pushed herself up, her rose colored eyes wide. “Maybe I should what?”

“Maybe you should stay over every night,” Saeyoung replied without thinking. The cheeky grin plastered to his face served to mask the spike of fear that twisted his gut as soon as the words left his mouth. What if she turned him down? What if she thought they were moving too fast? What if she broke up with him?

“Every…?” Ji-ae mused slowly, her eyes studying his face with wonder. “Sae, are you asking me what I think you’re asking?” she asked hopefully.

Biting his lip Saeyoung forced himself to meet her gaze. “I mean… if you want to, of course. I know it’s kinda soon and we haven’t been dating that long…” he trailed off, swallowing nervously. Ji-ae’s eyes never left his burning face; her hopeful expression the only thing keeping him going. “…but I’m terrified that I’ll lose you if I don’t act.” The words tumbled out of him in a rush, leaving him breathless.

Ji-ae was silent for a moment and Saeyoung’s heart pounded deafeningly in his ears as he waited for her to speak.

“Of course I want to stay with you Saeyoung!” she exclaimed, pulling him into a tight embrace.

“Y-you do?” the redhead asked incredulously, his voice cracking. “You don’t think it’s too soon?”

“I was going to ask if we could start moving my stuff in today, actually,” Ji-ae replied with a laugh, lifting her face to look at him, her eyes alight with excitement.

A heady lighthearted sensation engulfed Saeyoung at her words and she squeezed her back tightly, not wanting to let go. “Of course Honey~” Clearing his throat he pulled back to gaze at her as well, their foreheads still touching. “But first…”

“First?” Ji-ae asked, shivering at the sudden bold look in his golden eyes.

“You did say you could get used to doing more of… this,” Saeyoung murmured, his voice turning husky as his hands wandered lower, pulling Ji-ae closer and hooking her leg over his hips.

Ji-ae squeaked, her eyes going wide again as she clutched at Saeyoung’s chest. “I did say that,” she replied slowly, waiting for his next move. He grinned as he kissed her thoroughly, excited at the prospect of starting every morning this way.

OTP asks

#mystic messenger #mystic messenger fanfiction #707 #luciel choi #saeyoung choi #saeyoung x mc #custom mc #oc: Ji-ae Choi #otp: lets marry at the space station #mysme #ask #nerdylunagirl

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jozstanko-art · 6 years

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inspired by @kirachama‘s one-shot Escape Artist; a Phantom Thieves!AU which I fell in love with and begged her to post ^^

#mystic messenger #phantom thieves au #mm 707 #saeyoung choi #luciel choi #saeyoung x mc #custom mc #otp: lets marry at the space station #psssst i love niku's writing #you all need to read this #oc: Ji-ae Choi

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princeforestfox · 6 years

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I had a rough day so I drew this to cheer myself up

#saeyoung choi #luciel choi #mm seven #mystic messenger 707 #707 #my art #mystic messenger #707 x mc #custom mc

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7ong0stacy7 · 6 years

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Saeyoung & custom MC in Harry Potter X Mystic Messenger AU for @reifromrfa’s mysme challenge. The MC is kinda customised to look like myself. 😂😅 Anyways~ I really how this painting turned out. Gonna make this my new profile pic 😝

#reismysmechallenge #watercolours #watercolour paint #painting #my art #mystic messenger #mysme #mystic messenger 707 #mysme 707 #saeyoung choi #luciel choi #custom mc #hp au #harry potter #hogwarts #fan art #mysme x hp #harry potter au

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galaxieflora · 2 years

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I’ve only drawn one art of my custom MC Byul before and I wanted to draw some more of her so here!

#my art #Mystic Messenger #custom MC #CMC #OC: Yoon Byul #MysMe 707 #Choi Saeyoung #Choi Luciel #707 x CMC #707 x OC #Saeyoung x OC #Saeyoung x CMC #Luciel x CMC #Luciel x OC #707 x Byul #Saeyoung x Byul #Luciel x Byul

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jinjinranran · 2 years

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I realized I never posted Saeyoung's CMC Mari here 🙈

(+ daily life with the Choi family 🍅)

#this is so old oops #i think now all my cmcs are here? 🤔 i need to make a list or smth lol #mystic messenger #mysme #saeyoung choi #707 #seven #saeyoung x mc #seven x mc #luciel choi #saeran choi #se saeran #saeran x mc #custom mc #cmc #pili oc #oc: oh mari #oc: ahn jinae #my art

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marshmallowprotection · 2 years

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Cygnus

Pairing: Saeyoung/Eunji [CMC]

Description: Eunji spent her entire life always afraid to commit to something. She would fly close to the sun and let her fear take over her heart before she'd get to touch it. This fear enveloped her life for such a long time that she didn't know how to else. But, when she met Seven on that first day, it was like she couldn't turn away. She was bound to face him. Even if her heart didn't know how to handle what was to come.

For @im-the-mystic-messenger’s Holiday Gift Exchange. Gift for @gureishi! I had a lot of fun working with Eunji since it’s been a while since I’ve written a story for a Seven CMC. I hope this captures everything that it’s supposed to, though! The time spent in the closed apartment is something that is difficult for anyone to manage, and it's harder when you have to confront your demons.

[Read On AO3]

“You’re with the one you—”

“Shut up!”

The shattered remains of Meowy rest against the ground, forgotten and abandoned as Seven’s gaze lingered on Eunji. It felt like the room had somehow become smaller. The apartment was suddenly a box that had no exits or windows to retreat to. It was by design. They couldn’t leave this space for their own good but it was driving them up a wall. He was walking a thin line by a wildfire and she was teetering on the edge of the cliff.

The universe might have wanted them to think that they couldn’t be any further apart than they were at that moment. But Eunji knew that couldn’t be the case. It might have been that they were living through different natural disasters but those events were tied together and interlocked in a way that neither of them could deny. Even as much as Seven wanted to bite his tongue and yell at her that they couldn’t have been any more different.

Inside of her chest, she knew that they were one and the same, no matter what anyone said about it. She just knew. It was like a clenching inside of her heart that couldn’t be ignored. It demanded to be felt. It didn’t matter if she wanted to turn away from it. Feelings demanded to be felt. They were a part of the human experience. There was a frown on her lips as she carefully nudged all of the broken pieces of Meowy back together again. He had turned his back on her but she wouldn’t turn on him.

“You didn’t have to go that far,” she said. It was like the slip of the tongue. She hadn’t meant to say it aloud but she wasn’t the most couth about things. Eunji had spent days walking on shells and broken glass left by the remains of what the hacker—no, Saeran’s—arrival and subsequent disappearance had left in its wake. “You’re better than that.”

His breath was hot in his lungs as he did his best to glower at her, trying his damnedest to seem tall, “How many times do I have to tell you, Eunji?! I’ve told you over and over but you don’t listen to a word I say at all! Is all you hear out of me what you want me to say?! The person that you think you like— the smiling idiot in the chatroom that pretends to be a good-for-nothing clown—that’s not me. That isn’t ever going to be me! It was all lies, stupid lies, pranks, masks that I created! I am a filthy liar, nothing more, nothing less!”

“I don’t think you’re a liar, Seven,” her voice strangely quiet in comparison to the back and forth matches that they’ve had over the past couple of days in this apartment. “There’s a difference in this world between lying because you want to do it for self-gain and because you have to do it or your world is at risk. You haven’t had a choice, right? That doesn’t make you filth. Fine, a liar if you want, but not filth..”

“Get some fucking self-preservation, pussycat. Do you know how many people have said that about guys like me and ended up dead? Too many to count right now. You don’t have any idea what you’re playing at! I don’t— It’s one thing to play the sweet saint that sees good in the most sinful bastard, but that’s going to be what gets you killed if you aren’t careful! Don’t you think at all?! My God, you were willing to walk into an apartment after getting catfished!”

“I’m not gullible enough to think that I can handle every threat out there, Seven. But I can handle myself a lot better than you think I can!”

His laughter this time is a bitter sound, almost as if he’s on the brink of tears or losing control of himself right in front of her. He raked a hand through his messy red curls as he tried. God, he’d been trying, but he was lashing out at every turn. He was pushing back against Eunji every time he got the chance. He was deflecting and trying to run away from her as fast as he could. Those looks in his golden eyes were something that she knew very well.

It was a feeling that she’d held in her eyes many times. She knew that look. It was like being the cornered cat in an alleyway that had messed with the wrong dog. You couldn’t find your way in that dark space to look for an opening to leave. The only thing that you could do was to think as fast as you could, regardless of what it meant when you made your great escape, knowing that it was better to be bruised instead of dead.

Eunji knows what it feels like to run.

That is to say, she knows the feeling of being afraid of feeling confined that there’s no choice left but to run, and this sensation is one that she wouldn’t readily choose for herself or wish onto the people that she hated the most. It’s messy, it’s painful, and it leaves you gasping for air that you may not be able to breathe again. Her lungs always threaten to close when this happens. It’s suffocating to live knowing that tomorrow may not be the same as the day before, but that’s always been her biggest fear, huh?

There’s a voice in the back of her head saying that maybe, just maybe, the reason why she’s in this situation in the first place is that it’s payback for the heartache and destruction that she’d given to those that only wanted to love her outright. It’s a bitter whisper that sounds like her voice but not quite. It’s something deep-seated inside of her chest that reminds her of something that she wants to ball up and throw away. But, she can’t throw it away when it’s in front of her, now, can she?

She’s been shoved away from others that once cared for her plenty of times. It was because their patience and kindness ran out time and time again. Her fear of being trapped or being forced into something that she wasn’t ready for caused her to lash out and hurt others in ways that she would regret later on; but, at the moment? She wouldn’t think twice about acting a certain way to make people go away because she didn’t know how else to cope with it.

Those feelings were like a rockslide waiting to happen. It seemed as though she was always waiting for a storm of rocks to come tumbling down on top of her at any moment. How could she not fear that very conclusion when every single relationship she’d witnessed when she needed to know some kind of stability crumbled to rumble right in front of her eyes? She saw her mother and father crash and burn in a chaotic string of discontent and then as she grew older, she saw that the relationships that she had created do the very same thing.

Eunji acted on impulse. It was the way that she knew how to live. She could roll with the punches and make sense of them later because there was no other choice. However, now that she was here in front of Seven, she could see her emotions and actions reflected tenfold. She was seeing a mirror of her past, present, and future. Except, this time, she had a choice to decide what she wanted to do with her life. It felt like in the past, the lump in her throat caused her to never think things through to the end.

Yet, when she saw Seven standing in front of her with the same charged look in his eyes that she’d seen reflected in the eyes of her loved ones so many times, Eunji realized something that she might not have in the past. Something that nobody else had seen when she was lashing out and crying for help. What she saw wasn’t selfishness, stubbornness, or self-destructiveness. She didn’t hear those words hissed in the back of her head that claimed she was an idiot.

What Eunji saw in his eyes was fear, insecurity, and shame.

A cry for help that he was trying to hide behind walls that he couldn’t put back up no matter how many times he tried to put it back together.

Truly, no matter how many times he added more dead leaves to the fire that scorched his heart, he was never going to be able to hide what Eunji saw in his golden eyes. Even as she held tightly to the cliff ledge where the rocks were tumbling on top of her by the minute, she could see him burning alive on the top of the edge. She didn’t want to watch it happen in real-time when she could do something.

It was frightening to feel this strongly, so much so that she still felt the dry ache in the back of her throat from crying until she could no longer feel the sting of tears in her eyes; Rather, the coldness of the shower water that had been running for far too long. As Eunji stared into Saeyoung’s eyes, all she knew was that she had to stop running away from everything. If she didn’t stop to breathe and think things through, her fingers were going to slip from the rocks and she’d finally fall to the ground just as she had started to feel as though she wanted to climb back up.

Charged by that statement, Seven was quick to make a move. Eunji gasped—he moved to push her back against the ground, which wasn’t hard given that she was still seated against the carpet— and with her arms pinned above her head, she had nowhere to go except with him. His eyes twisted and complicated, hard to get a read on. “Is that so? You’re not gullible? Do you know what kind of sick and twisted things someone could do to you when you have an attitude like that? Why would you want that for yourself?!”

She shifted uncomfortably, but kept her eyes locked on his, “Because… I know that you’d never do something like that to me, Seven. You can warn me all day that there are bad guys out there, but I’m damn sure that you’re not one of those people. You’ve been looking out for me from the start. It’s not even just me, either, you’re constantly looking out for and supporting the others. I don’t like you because you’re some kind of mask, Seven. I like you because you’re you, Seven. I know you’re more than the mask.”

Silence washed over them. Neither Eunji nor Seven said anything right away, rather they looked at each other as if speaking without saying a single word. There was a story in this mess to be told but one that couldn’t easily be opened. It was locked away behind years of grime and rust that caked the locks that hid them. Eunji closed her eyes briefly but when she did, she felt the splash of tears against her cheeks.

When she looked at Seven again, she found herself looking at a man that could hardly hold himself together as it was. His grip slowly loosened on her wrist but he couldn’t bring himself to find any energy to pull himself away from her… all he had were the tears that remained as his mask started to crack all at once.

His voice was raw, “How… How many times do I have to tell you, kitten? I can’t be with you. We can’t be together, Eunji, ever. Everything that surrounds me… all of it. It’s all just an illusion that will go away someday, and I’ll be gone with it. All traces of me will disappear one day, and you’ll be left with nothing. Even if all of you… all of the RFA… embrace the mask of 707 as he is, he’ll be gone sooner than you thought you knew him. You don’t have any idea who I am. Don’t act like you do. Just leave me alone before you get burned… leave me alone, Eunji, I’m begging you.”

Eunji reached up with her hands, firmly affirmed in what she was doing, cupping his face in her hands as gently as she could. Her thumbs wiped away a few of the stray tears. “Please, help me so I understand who you are, then. Let me embrace the real you. I don’t want to run away, Seven. For the first time in my life, I don’t want to run away from somebody I love dearly… I just want to be able to know the real you.”

It was as if Eunji could see over the edge of the cliff again. Her hands rubbed raw by the years of clinging to the stone, bloodied and bruised, but at the same time, strong and calloused by being able to understand how long she could survive despite the pain. She was reaching out for him as best she could, knowing that if he took the risk, he would be able to take a step away from the fire that surrounded him.

“Eunji, if I can’t even protect my one and only brother when I dedicated my life completely to his happiness, then how can I ever be enough to protect you? I’ve given it up before, all of it, and look where I am. I don’t want you to live this life. I don’t want you to end up like Saeran… like me… like this… fire that won’t stop trying to destroy me until I have the guts to admit that I’ll never be good enough to protect anyone?” His voice cracked as he spoke, unable to make its way through the hole in his chest.

“Seven, I can handle myself as long as you’re by my side,” Eunji whispered. The sound of her soft breathing eating at the words. “I don’t care how complicated it gets.”

Funny, she thought. In the past, she would’ve been so petrified of admitting that to anyone she loved.

“Eunji,” his pained voice almost pleaded with her to give up. “Please. Don’t do this to me. Please… I can’t. I… I cherish you. There’s nothing I want more than to make you happy, but I can’t! I just can’t do it! Why would you want this? Why would you want this lock without a key to open it up? What’s… wrong with you… what’s… wrong with me? Why can’t you take a hint and leave before it’s too late? What are you going to do if somebody hurts you because of me…?”

“Seven,” Eunji stressed. Her voice was as firm as she could manage. She didn’t want to hold him too close because it might scare him away. Hell, it was making her heartbeat so fast that she felt like she was going to be sick, too. It was so much, but she simply couldn’t take living like this anymore. He couldn’t, either. Sooner or later, this had to come to an end. “I’m never going to regret my feelings for you. I mean it… I mean it.”

“...You shouldn’t say that so easily to me,” he whispered. It seemed like he was confused as if those feelings were chipping away at him every second he thought about her words. He was speaking his thoughts out loud, more so than he was saying anything to Eunji. “Damn, why are you doing this? Why are you putting my heart through this now? I told myself… to never get close to anyone… but you’re… you’re trying to put out the fire… I… what am I supposed to do?”

Eunji wrapped her arms around his neck briefly, catching the scent of cinnamon and honey against his throat before she pulled away. Seven sat back as she scooted away from him for his sake. “Take a moment… take as long as you need. Take some time to think, Seven. I want you to choose whatever you want because you want it, not because you feel like you have no choice.”

So, Seven sat there on the floor, a faraway look in his eyes as he lowered his gaze. It seemed like a step in the right direction if anything. But it was hard to say what he felt with how backward things had been in the apartment. He clarified after Eunji rose to head towards the kitchen to grab herself something to drink after that, as well as give him some space to breathe, “I need time.”

“I’ll wait,” Eunji replied, her head tipped against her shoulder as she looked back at him to see that lost look in his eyes. Her heart was pounding against her chest but she was doing what she could to avoid crying at that moment. It felt like she had hit something hard after swinging at nothing for so long. She’d struck close to the truth but how long could that hold out? “As long as it takes.”

“...Thank you.”

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