#about how i get upset when medical professionals who DO NOT NEED TO KNOW

[sag-dab-sar]

Medical professional: *who has no actual reason to know why I'm using my wheelchair* so why are you using a wheelchair?

Me: Legs don't work well 🫤

Medical professional:

#cpunk #cripple punk #mobility aid #wheelchair #void post #result of talking to a friend #about how i get upset when medical professionals who DO NOT NEED TO KNOW #ask me why im in my wheelchair #and i feel obligated to answer because well they are medical professionals #and she called them stupid because ''are they stupid maybe it's because walking can be an issue for you'' #''its like asking me why i wear glasses— well sir because i prefer to see'' #it's actually for legs back overall pain and heart but do they really need to fucking know all that? #and i thought of a better way to answer their dumb question #legs dont work well #not a lie #short simple and probably makes them feel a tad stupid for asking

[scientia-rex]

Hey. HEY. We aren’t good at understanding how bodies work. I spent five years in undergrad (I was indecisive; graduated with six years’ worth of credits), two in my terminal master’s program, four in med school, and three more in residency. I know a whole lot about how bodies work. I am qualified to tell you that we don’t know a lot more than we do know.

This means that, when you encounter a claim, you need to weigh it against what you have experienced.

I have met doctors who were sure fibromyalgia, or “muscle hurty disease,” from the roots of the word, was just women being crazy. Turns out it’s probably at least partly due to autoimmune dysfunction. Or maybe not! Sure would be nice if we knew! But I sure as shit know it’s real, because I have it and so do the women in my family. Our bodies don’t work right, somehow. They don’t work like other people’s bodies work. I experience more pain than I “should” based on what stimuli other people find painful. I have less ability to build and maintain muscle strength. This has not kept me from doing what I love most in the world, which is have opinions, to the point where I went through the horrifically awful process that is medical training in the US just so I could have opinions all day long and get paid for it. I gain nothing from saying I have it, and in fact risk the opinions of my professional peers if I do admit to it, since it is still seen as a disease of mental or moral weakness. I’m perfectly qualified to self-diagnose, as a board-certified family physician.

And yet I believed people in positions of authority for a long, long time who said it was a mental illness and not a bodily one. As if those even can be distinct, when our brains are part of our bodies and our experience of reality is filtered through their circuitry. But I believed that I was somehow to blame for being in pain.

Life has been better since I accepted that I just need to do some things differently. If I lift weights, I need to use machines, I need to start on the lowest possible setting, and I need to increase very gradually. If I do cardio, I need a low-impact model like an elliptical trainer; running outside, every time I have tried it in my life, results in incapacitating shin splints, even if I try to work up slowly. I no longer buy laundry bins that don’t roll. My home is all on one level. I go to physical therapy. I stash freezer dinners that contain (shudder) vegetables, my least favorite thing, so that when I do feel like shit, I have an alternative to starving (or eating a block of cheese that upsets my stomach).

Accommodate yourself. This society isn’t going to help much, if at all. In your good times and days, be the person whose help you’ll need in your worst days.

#the attending dr. kristophine #once again I am not asking for anyone’s advice #don’t tell me how you think I can start running #that’s not the point and it’s a real dick move

[ms-demeanor]

any tips for Adult Phone Calls? i've been putting some off and it's going to start costing me money if i don't Get It Together soon, but that pressure just makes it harder!! part of my issue is not knowing what The Script is and part of it is that i find real-time conversation as An Adult really daunting....

Yes!

Okay so a big part of my job is answering phone calls; I am a professional person who answers phone calls from people who would rather not have to call me and who are usually confused and upset by what is happening, which often has the potential to be expensive for them. It's a stressful call to make!

As a professional phone answerer, here are the things that help ME when people call:

Be able to describe the reason that you're calling and what you would like to do about it. This is a simple two-step giving basic background information and your desired outcome so that the person answering the phone can get the process started for you. Examples: "Hi, I'm a new patient referred by Doctor X; I'd like to make an appointment with Dr. Y." "Hi, I tried to use my credit card but it was rejected, I would like to know why." "Hi, I am calling about a late payment; I would like it removed from my record." "Hi, my sink is leaking and I'd like to schedule a visit for repair." "Hi, I think my computer has a virus, I'd like to bring it in to get checked out."

Call when you have some time. Don't call when you've only got five minutes to be on the phone, this could take a while and you will be less stressed if you call when you've got at least ten minutes to half an hour where you won't be interrupted. If you are less stressed, the person taking the call will be less stressed, and the whole process will work better.

Have any account/ticket/serial number/referral information handy. Pre-game the call in your head and think about any questions they might need to ask you, then gather the information they might need. Examples: If you're calling about something like a car or computer hardware, know the basics of make/model/age. If you're calling a financial institution or service provider, have your account number, verification information, etc. handy If you're calling a medical office you might want to have a list of medications as well as your insurance card available.

And here's some information that might make CALLERS more comfortable:

We're not mad at you for making the phone call; talking to you is our job. You're not bothering anyone or imposing on anyone's time. Please make the call instead of churning in panic for weeks or months; it's much easier to fix something or resolve an issue if it's addressed early than if you respond to it months down the line.

You can just say right off the bat that you're not sure about the call or that you don't know what's going on and you need help. You might want to say something like "Hi, I'm having an issue and I don't know the next steps to take to get it resolved; could you please help me?"

You can also just say something like "Hi, thanks for helping me; I'd like to let you know that I have a little trouble using the phone and may need to ask questions as we go or think for a second. Thanks for being patient with me, here's my issue."

There is like a zero percent chance that your call is going to be one of the more stressful things they do that day. The call is stressful for you, it is very routine for them, and they are used to everything from getting screamed at to trying to communicate in languages they don't speak to help callers.

Also: if you have not called this place before, feel free to call it with no plans to speak to anyone just to see how the phone system works. It may be an automated phone system and you can call and pre-navigate the options and take notes for when you're ready to call back, and you may be able to find out more of what the system will ask of you. If you get picked up by a person when you're not ready you can simply say "Oh, I'm sorry, I've got another call coming in, I'll call back, thank you" and hang up.

The Script for most Adult-type phone calls is "I am having X problem and I need help fixing it," and then requests for information and someone either providing a resolution for you issue or escalating it to the next step in the process.

It's hard to pre-plan a script without more details because some people you'll call will have a more difficult script than others (canceling cable, for instance, can be a hassle and there are people out there who have written specific instructions on how to do that) and some will be very easy (scheduling an appointment or opening an account can often be very simple!) but regardless of how difficult the specific script is you can ask for help along the way, and the process will be easier if you've done a little information gathering about your own needs/issues/desired resolution.

Good luck! Please don't let the phone scare you too much! People on the other end of the phone are usually quite happy to help.

If it's something really contentious like dealing with a collections agency, look up specific resource guides because that's where it pays to have a very specific idea in mind of how you're going to approach the problem.

[snifflesthemouse]

Is Harry Suing the UK to Hide Truth of Visa and Security?

Let’s talk about a few things going on in the Royal News World, Shall We?

This mouse isn’t completely sure of coming back entirely, but I figured a post here and there would be fine. Let’s get started.

My people come bearing some insights: Just about everyone in the aristocracy is openly aware that Harry isn’t truly cut off. As a matter of fact, some believe that Harry is only in the US because Charles sent him here and he is in fact on an A1 visa. Not so much as a banishment, but as a way to play both sides of the media circus and keep them all relevant. The whole world tunes in every time something pops up.

What brings more clickbait? Ask yourself the hard questions, though, don’t take the easy route. I’ve seen some things going around, and I see people truly never ask the hard questions.

I pray for the day when everyone wakes up and realizes that being elderly doesn’t make you harmless or innocent. This author was told the same things about Harry not being told about the diagnosis for the cancer until we all heard, BUT BEFORE. Interesting that ever got leaked out in the press, isn’t it? Why even tell us when he got told? Harry probably leaked it and did it to make Charles look favorable. Do you think Charles would let it get leaked? To what end? To look like the loving, yet firm father everyone demands him to be, the man that he cannot. The man he is not.

And now there are articles coming out about the contingency plans for Charles being sick. Harry is not in them, at all. Why would he need to be? Doesn’t that say a lot? The fact people have to be told Harry isn't included is silly. But you know what they say about assumptions.

Now, I was told by a friend that’s a doctor the whole story of the cancer being found during the prostate stuff made no sense. They would’ve seen other indicators beforehand. They ARE the greatest medical professionals on the planet, aren’t they? You mean a PET scan or blood test or anything like that, at all, wouldn’t hint at the other problems? This was a choreographed release of information.

It's being suggested that the press will be informed to release a cascade of tidbits over the coming weeks. Lady C said early spring, before summer. She also said it was Princess Anne who made the “racist baby” comments, and that was also a ruse. I’m pretty sure Lady C picked Team Charles back in the 80s, and she’s been working to gain grace and favor since. I think she wants to seem like she knows things to sell books or views. Go, girl, get that paper.

Speaking of paper, it was suggested one of the main reasons Charles was so upset with Harry when he “rushed right over” was because he asked for more money. Anyone could assume that but think about what he did immediately afterwards. He went over there only to have something to give an interview for. He got paid to “not squeal” on an interview. The Sussexes don’t lift a finger for free… they only lift them for freebies. Or money.

If Harry is here on an A1 Visa as a favor between Charles and the US, that means we are paying for that security in America. No wonder Harry is suing the UK, he needs to make it look like he needs something when he already has it. How would they possibly have the money to pay for their own? I posted the mortgage documents, remember. Do the math. They have 10 years to pay that house off in full before they get a 7.48% interest rate. They have upkeep, services, servants, nannies, clothes, utilities, maintenance that must be maintained or the bank could come in and do it themselves… Those things aren’t cheap. You have to have a faucet of money coming in to handle it all. They don’t even have a drip.

Oh, and I was told to really look at Harry’s page on the Royal website. And that the minute Wills gets that crown, his brother will be done for. Which is why Charles could be trying to be a father instead of a king in that situation. Then again, if Wills had hard feelings for both Charles and Harry, and Charles had a jealousy over Wills and the Queen… that’s a lot of ifs

One this is for sure. Harry will NEVER return to the BRF in a working capacity. Everything is a dance of smoke and mirrors.

It makes total sense to have Harry here on an A1 visa, have him in constant litigation with the UK so we peons think he needs security, but in reality he is here on a visa supplying him the protection he thinks he deserves. Of course, an FOIA would need to be filed, probably… I wonder if I could do that and see how he is really here. I don’t believe he is here on an O1 or spousal visa.

What is the real reason for all of this, people? It's just Flying Pasta, like before.

#megxit #prince harry #uk royal family #government

[pix3lplays]

omg so uhm i have this idea where the hsr boys take care of pregnant reader?? damn can the characters be dan heng jing yuan sampo blade and luocha gepard also if you do this req tysm i love your writing style thank you so much omg ilysm

And I LOVE YOU TOO, I’ve been WAITING for a request like this, let’s do it, I’m literally so excited!

And thank you so much for the compliment, I’m so glad you like my writing style💕

Seriously let me know if you have any more ideas along these lines-

Cw! Pregnancy

-Hsr men taking care of pregnant!reader-

Dan Heng: Dan Heng is ANXIOUS. Anxious as heck. It’s pretty much invisible to the others but not to you, you can tell your poor man is genuinely freaking out about being a father. He checks in on you a lot, with that quiet, calm voice, but you can hear the panic seeping through the cracks. “Are you feeling okay?” “How is the baby?” stuff like that.

You don’t know why he’s so nervous though. You’re confident he’s going to be a great dad.

He does all sorts of things for you, but one of the most notable was when he went through the Astral Express and baby-proofed the whole place, covering sharp corners and putting blankets over the cushions of the couches and such. THANKFULLY Pom Pom was understanding of Dan Heng’s anxiety, and allowed the modifications.

Dan Heng stays very close to you, making sure you’re taking care of yourself and being careful. You have to be REALLY careful, otherwise he’ll start worrying again. But all in all he’s a very good expecting father, just super anxious and a little bit of a helicopter towards you.

Jing Yuan: you’d almost think Jing Yuan has done this before considering how calm and relaxed he is as a soon-to-be father. I mean, he’s essentially done fatherhood before with Yanqing, so in a way YEAH, he is prepared. He’s very very calm and charming around you.

He’s not afraid to touch you while your pregnant. He’s confident and careful, stroking your stomach gently while he hums a song for his child.

He takes great care of you. Makes sure you’re taking your vitamins and drinking plenty of water.

He’s kind, but firm with you. He wants you and his baby to stay healthy and safe.

He hates hates HATES having to be away from you for work matters, so if it’s safe enough he probably takes you with him.

Sampo Koski: (Sampo’s the kind who tries to run when he finds out you’re pregnant, change my mind.) Sampo…is not a great father-to-be. He doesn’t want kids, he’s not ready or willing to be tied down like that.

Doesn’t mean he won’t take care of you though. He’s just awkward about it, doesn’t really want to think about how the reason he’s being extra gentle with you is because you’re growing a life inside of you.

He’ll give you massages and stuff, and ask how you’re feeling, but that’s about the extent of it. He really, really doesn’t want to have kids, he’s so upset about it, but he NEEDS to be responsible so he’ll force himself to get used to the idea.

Blade: Blade, at first, seems impassive and indifferent when you inform him you’re pregnant with his baby. But his care for you manifests itself in his actions, not his words.

He hovers around you a lot more now, stands closer to you, gives sharp looks to even the other Stellaron hunters if they get too close to you. He’s very protective of you and his child-to-be.

He doesn’t know why. He’s never imagined himself as a father, but now this was happening and it’s suddenly so real and he barely has time to figure out what to think, let alone what to Do.

But he really is doing his best, and he feels this strange urge to protect you and his child, a fatherly instinct if you would. Neither of you are confident that he’s going to be a great dad at first, but as you witness how protective but gentle he is with you, your mind begins to change. Maybe Blade would be a good dad after all.

Luocha: Luocha is a medical man. As soon as he hears your pregnant, he goes full medical professional mode on you. He’s in charge of your vitamins and prescriptions, and he takes his job very seriously.

He soothes your pregnancy pains with his powers, he knows how to give good massages, he’s just all around very good at taking care of you.

But he’s also strict on you. You’re raising a life, that’s a serious responsibility. He’s very firm with you that you take your medicines on time, every single day.

The strangest part is you can’t tell if Luocha even wants to be a father or not, just that he takes the role very seriously. And you have a strong feeling that it’ll be hard to get the truth out of Luocha if he actually doesn’t want to be a father. He’s always been good at masking his true feelings.

Gepard Landau: is the definition of a helicopter father. Oh my gosh. He literally organizes a personal guard for you to watch over you when he’s busy working. And even when he’s working he’s spending all his time thinking about you and worrying about the baby. He calls or texts you to check in on you whenever he can.

The poor man is smothering you, to be honest. Finally you have to tell him, even though you know it’s Probably going to hurt him.

The poor guy apologizes profusely, even after you tell him it’s alright, he just needs to tone it down a little. Well. He tries at least. He’s still very anxious and wants to constantly check in on you, but he forces himself to Sit Back and Relax a little bit. You’re not going to explode if he’s away from you for two seconds.

But suffice to say, he does take very good care of you while you’re pregnant. He’s very, Very protective of you, always standing nearby when he can, his hand on your shoulder or the small of your back.

Well.

You certainly feel safe, that’s for sure.

#honkai star rail #honkai star rail x reader #my writing #jing yuan #jing yuan x reader #hsr jing yuan x reader #honkai star rail jing yuan x reader #dan heng #dan heng x reader #hsr dan heng x reader #honkai star rail dan heng x reader #blade x reader #honkai star rail blade x reader #Hsr Blade x reader #Blade #Sampo Koski #sampo koski x reader #Hsr Sampo x reader #honkai star rail Sampo x reader #Luocha #Luocha x reader #Hsr Luocha x reader #honkai star rail Luocha x reader #Gepard Landau #Gepard Landau x reader #Hsr Gepard x reader #Honkai Star rail Gepard x reader #pregnancy

[s-creations]

Hues Chapter 3: Mush-Fever

Mario forgets. Just because they're in a new place…doesn't mean old problems disappear.

Fandom: Super Mario & Releated Fandoms Rating: Teen and UP Audiences Relationship: Mario & Luigi (Nintendo), Wario & Mario (Nintendo), Waluigi & Mario (Nintendo), Mario/Princess Peach (Nintendo) Additional Tags: Mario needs help, Luigi's not feeling great, Wario and Waluigi are not overly great with the whole 'comforting' thing.

‘Top story this morning: we’ve officially entered into Mush-Fever season. A few reports are already coming in of Toad’s being checked in. Medical professionals are warning that this season’s gonna be a rough one. It’s advised that you keep an eye out for early symptoms and call your doctor immediately if you suspect someone’s sick. 

Early symptoms are: 

High Fever

Extreme Fatigue/Constantly Sleeping

Loss of Appetite

If someone starts sprouting abnormal growths, call it in immediately. Better to be safe than sorry.’

Mario let out a wide yawn as he waited for the coffee to finish brewing. Barely taking in the news report that was on the television. Really just wanting background noise while he tried to wake up. 

Normally, Luigi would be up and about before Mario. But everyone was still recovering from King Boo’s attack a few weeks prior. And if everyone else was still shaken just dealing with the Ecto-Ghosts, Mario couldn’t even begin to imagine how Luigi felt. 

So, if Luigi wanted to lie in bed, Mario was going to let his little brother sleep for as long as he needed. Left to battle through his morning slog alone

Mario perked up when the coffee announced it was finished. Pouring the wonderful caffeine into a red mug, topping it off with milk and sugar before shuffling into the living room. Nursing his drink as he watched the screen flash before him. Still not really taking in the information that was being presented.

A familiar chill fell over Mario. Giving him ample warning before Polterpup phased through the ceiling. Who let out a small whine as they sat next to Mario. 

“Hey doggie, you sleep well last night? …Do ghosts sleep?” Mario frowned softly in thought as Polterpup nudged his arm, whining again, “What’s up pup?”

The special pup jumped from the couch. Turning back to the human, letting out a bark before pointing towards the stairs. Still confused but realizing that something was wrong, Mario was up. 

“Alright, what’s going on?” Mario’s eyes followed Polterpup as they floated up the stairs. Soon close behind, finding said pup now sitting outside of Luigi’s room. Polterpup nervously tapped the ground as Mario walked closer. The hero gently knocked on said door.

“Hey, Luigi, you doing okay? Polterpup came down to get me and they seemed really upset about something. …Luigi? …I hope you’re decent, cuz I’m coming in.”

“Oh, hey, you’re still asleep? You’re sleeping the day away! Come on, how about we get started, yeah? …Luigi? You need to get up.”

“Lu?”

“Weegee?”

Even with the mask that was covering the lower half of his face, it was clear that Luigi was in pain. Skin pale, breathing harsh and shallow, eyes screwed up in pain, hand clutching desperately to the sheet covering him. Numerous Toads, masks tied around their heads to cover their mouths, were rushing around. Not just focusing on Luigi, but also the other patients resting in the beds. Occasionally, a Toad would pluck off a few green mushrooms from Luigi’s skin. The human wincing every time his skin was pulled.

Mario could only watch from the wide window. Stuck in the hallway as his eyes remained on his brother’s tense form. Hand pressed against the cold glass, feeling as if he was about to break. 

He couldn’t do this again.

Not again.

“He’ll be okay,” Peach kept her voice even, knowing how hard this was for Mario. A small smile on her face in an attempt to offer comfort. “Luigi has the best people looking after him. This is a common illness, it happens every year. There’s nothing to worry about.”

The last sentence caused more damage than help. Mario reached up to pull his cap down over his eyes. The hand pressed against the window turning into a fist. 

“Mario-”

“Common doesn’t mean non-deadly,” Mario choked out. 

“Luigi will be fine.”

“You can’t promise that. Not…Not with how he is…”

Peach bit her lip, “Why don’t we go and-”

“I can’t leave him.”

“...You can’t do anything here, this isn’t helping you or Luigi.”

“Don’t!” Mario pulled away, eyes blazing, “Don’t…say that. You don’t understand, you can’t understand… Just leave me alone.”

He marched over to the bench located on the opposite side of the hallway. Eyes going back to the window, even if he couldn’t see Luigi anymore. Remaining tight as he stared the pane of glass down. Peach remained frozen for a few moments before nodding. 

“Very well… If you need anything, I believe it would be best for you to find a Toad. They’ll be able to help you find what you need.” And with that, she turned. The clicks of her heels soon gave way to silence, leaving Mario to these thoughts.. 

As the silence settled in, so did Mario’s realization as to what he’d done. He let out a low curse before throwing his hat onto the ground in frustration. Digging his fingers into his hair. Vision blurring. Hoping the external pain would drown out the internal pain. 

It didn’t.

Letting out a heavy puff of breath, Mario sat back up. Leaning against the wall while furiously rubbing his eyes with the heel of his palms. Sitting as such before picking his hat back up, shoved it back onto his head. Uncaring that it now lay lopsided on his head.

Eyes flickering back onto the window, his heart sank further. Knowing Luigi lay just on the other side. Out of reach for him to help.

The disgusting feeling in his stomach seemed to grow. 

“Excuse me.”

A green-capped Toad jumped hearing the new voice. Peering up to see the Kingdom’s hero. Who looked a little worse for wear. “Oh, hello Mario! What can I help you with?”

“I don’t suppose you have a phone I could borrow?”

_____________________________

Wario and Waluigi barely gave notice to the passing glances sent their way as they power walked down the castle halls. Fully focused on their goal. Practically skidding to a halt upon their last turn. They cautiously peered around the corner to find Mario sitting on the bench. Staring at the ground, hat in his hand, looking wilted.

“Don’t say anything stupid,” Wario whispered to his brother. 

“You’re one to talk.”

“You threw him into the lake last time he was like this.”

“He deserved it.”

“Just…don’t, okay.”

“Whatever.”

Neutral ground decided upon, they slowly walked forward. Mario barely flinched as Wario claimed a seat next to him. Waluigi deciding to stand by the window instead, looking into the medical wing. His frown seemed to deepen upon finding the state Luigi was in. 

“You rang?” Wario teased with a smirk. Only to falter when Mario didn’t respond. “...Hey, Luigi’s tough, he’ll be fine.”

“People get this illness every year. It’s more annoying than anything,” Waluigi added, “Greenie will be sleepy for a while after this. But otherwise, he’ll be fine.”

“Weegee’s not like other people…” Mario mumbled weakly. 

The older two exchanged glances. Wario replied with, “How about we go stretch our legs, yeah? Get some fresh air. I don’t think sitting in a dingy hallway is doing you much good.”

“Get away from here for a while.” said Waluigi.

Mario wasn’t given a chance to argue back. Wario already wrapping his arm around the younger’s shoulder and leading him away. The view to the medical window blocked by Waluigi. Who gave a ‘Don’t even try it’ look when the hero turned back. Mario frowned but didn’t say anything, merely faced forward again. 

The hero winced as he was brought out into the sunlight. Hating how bright the world was compared to his dark mood.

“You’re not taking me back to the lake, are you?” Mario mumbled out.

“No…but that does beg the question of what we are going to do.” Wario answered.

Waluigi let out a heavy sigh as he took the lead. “Thank Grambi one of us has a brain.”

“Hey now-”

“Don’t even argue with me. You know I’m right.”

“Yeah, maybe. But you don’t have to be rude about it.”

“Yes I do. It’s part of my charming personality.”

“You call that charm?”

“Far better than what your skills are.”

Mario couldn’t hold back a smile as he listened to them argue. Or, he supposed, their version of brotherly banter. 

Entering the town proper, the group of three strolled through the main shopping district. Wario mainly focused on the number of food stalls, which didn’t seem to bother Waluigi all that much. Mario quietly noted that a few were pieces that he’d tried and liked before while others were very new to his rather limited palette.  

It was hard to tell what was safe for a human to eat. But there hadn’t been any scares yet.

Wario and Waluigi were eventually carrying a number of bags in each arm.. Mario was still confused as to what they were planning. But listened with interest as the brother’s conversations turned from food selection to childhood stories as each choice seemed to bring up a new memory.

Where they’d gone to school and subsequently expelled from. Where their first business was. Both legal and ‘entrepreneurial’ related. Where they would meet up with Peach when the princess would sneak out from the castle for a break.

One of those places was a familiar one. Mario mentally commented that it was the same tree they’d taken Peach to on their first outing as a full group. He watched from the truck of said tree as the other two set up their small buffet. The hero feeling a small flicker of warmth enter his chest.

“...Is this a date?” Mario smirked at his question. 

Waluigi let out a snort while Wario rolled his eyes. The oldest walked over to Mario to ruffle the hero’s hair. “As if you could afford us. Come on, you got some new things to try.”

Even with the worry weighing heavily in his stomach, Mario felt himself begin to relax. Starting to laugh more at the brother’s jokes and antics. Absolutely thrilled by the new things he was trying. Happy to have a moment when his mind wasn’t focused on the stress.

The afternoon cooled out to a calm evening. Mario and Wario leaning against the tree as they watched Waluigi, who had been pulled into a game by a group of younger Toads. All clearly enamored by the long legged creature that just towered over them and who could casually kick the ball around. It was a few minutes into their next round when Wario broke the quiet.

“So, how are you feeling?”

The uncomfortable feeling settled back into Mario’s stomach. But it wasn’t as heavy as it had been just that morning.

He shifted to pull his knees to his chest, arms crossed over them. Pausing to really think about the question and answer with, “...Better, I guess.”

“Yeah? Listen, I know this is all still new and a little…scary. You two are finding something new thrown at your feet practically every day. Even your days off don’t feel that fulfilling. But we were saying those things to make you feel better. Luigi will be fine.”

The hero let out a low hum in acknowledgement. 

Wario frowned softly. “Do you believe me?”

“I mean…” Mario let out a heavy sigh, “I get it. We’re in a place that’s aware of what the problem is and how to help because they’ve seen it before. It’s common.”

“...But.”

“But no one’s been there when Luigi was fighting for his life. I told you before…Luigi was really sick when we were younger.” 

“Oh, yeah,” Wario nodded slowly, “Bad immune system, right?”

“Yeah, bad enough to…to almost die a few times.”

“Wait, what? You said he was cared for and got better, what do you mean he almost died?”

“I said he got better, but he was always teetering on the edge,” Mario sighed softly, “There were a lot of scares growing up. I had my fill of watching Luigi through glass when we were back on Earth. You can say that this Mush-Fever is common, that everyone gets it. But Luigi’s been taken down by the cold too many times to make anything ‘common’ seem safe.”

“A cold?”

“Um…I’m not really sure how to say this… It’s just Earth’s common illness. That doesn’t mean Luigi could fight it off like anyone else.”

“But…he’s doing better now?” Wario asked slowly.

“I mean, yeah…”

“I have a feeling you’re not telling me the whole story.”

Mario frowned softly. “Our parents were really worried about Luigi growing up. Even after the doctors told them Luigi would be fine. It was just a scary start, nothing to worry about. Except every time he was sick, he found himself in the hospital. Going outside was a gamble. I felt that…if I wasn’t careful, something small could kill him.”

“I made a promise when I was younger that I would keep Luigi safe, no matter what. That I would never, ever, see him again behind a window. I thought…I thought I was doing fine and then…”

Breathing shaky, Mario rubbed his eyes furiously, attempting to hide his tears. But Wario saw right through it. Wrapping an arm around the other tightly so Mario could lean against him. 

“Just let it out, you’re okay,” Wario mumbled, “You’re okay.” 

Despite Wario’s words, Mario pulled himself together quickly. Sniffing softly as he pulled away. “I can’t let anything happen to him. I’ll do anything to keep him alive…even if I can’t be.”

“You’re not serious…” Wario whispered, swallowing weakly, insides turning to ice.

“If it means Luigi’s safe, I’d happily trade my life for his.”

Wario’s eyes looked up to Waluigi. Who was now showing off how far he could kick the balls the kid Toads were playing with. “Yeah…I get it. But still, you know you have us, right?

“I know… I still feel weird asking for it.”

There was a painful stab to the gut hearing that. Wario shifting nervously, “...Take it from me, asking for help isn't that bad of a thing. Besides, I thought you were past this? You came to me to talk about your relationship with Peach.”

“I can’t ‘fix’ myself overnight. It’s still a struggle.”

“Fair.”

Mario let out a choked gasp as he was pulled into a loose headlock, “Hey!”

Wario didn’t miss the laugh that escaped the hero. “Look, if you can come to me for help, then you can go to Peach. She’d probably be the better person to go to, honestly.”

“If she takes my apology.”

“That bad?”

“Oof, that’s unfortunate. But she’s taken mine, she’ll take yours.”

“You’re not dating her.”

“...You’d better have a good plan in place.”

“Oh, thanks! What welcoming words you’ve offered me just make me feel so happy.”

Wario couldn’t hold back his laughter as Mario rolled his eyes.

_____________________________

Peach let out a relieved sigh as she was given a thumbs up from the Toads inside the medical wing. Giving a small wave as her reply. Merely happy to see the patients inside looked far more relaxed than from that same morning.

Luigi appeared to finally be resting peacefully. A comforting red returning to his cheeks.

A cleared throat pulled her attention away from the window. Finding a sheepish looking Mario standing beside her. 

“Hey…”

“Hello. You’ll be happy to know Luigi is past the worst of it and is on the path to a good recovery.”

Mario perked up at that. Quickly stepping closer to the window. Letting out a sigh of relief seeing Luigi’s calm and sleeping form. “Thank you for looking after him…and, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap at you this morning.”

Peach offered a sympathetic smile. Letting out a slow breath before saying, “My mother died of an illness that no one knew the origins of when I was just barely a teen.”

She could see from the corner of her eye that Mario flinched. The human was clearly scrambling to figure out what to say next until Peach gently took his head. 

“I’m not looking for an apology. This morning was not good for you and you were not in a…good place, emotionally. My comments this morning were not well placed, and for that I apologize. I didn’t want to hear warm regards and standard pleasantries when she was on her deathbed. I’m sure you had your fair share growing up as well. It’s never fun to be the one that has to watch and wait.”

“...I’m sorry for your loss.” Mario eventually said. Flushing softly when Peach placed a gentle kiss on his temple. 

“It’s alright, you didn’t know.”

“I am still sorry for this morning. I…forget that, just because we’re someplace new, not all of our old life was left behind. Wario was right when he said Luigi was tough. He’s been through a lot over the past few months and I guess that gave me a false sense of comfort. Because…I thought something like an illness couldn’t take him down again.”

“Even with your titles and what you’ve both been able to accomplish, that doesn’t make you invincible. We’ll just be better prepared for next year to make sure this doesn’t happen again.”

Mario smiles softly, “Yeah…next year.”

“Now, with that all out of the way, would you like to see Luigi?” Peach laughed softly as Mario perked up in interest. 

“Really?”

“He’s not contagious anymore. There’s no issue.”  She couldn’t help but laugh again as Mario rushed in. Following in soon after, checking in on her citizens while watching as Mario pulled up a chair next to the bed. 

Mario grabbed onto Luigi’s hand and pressed it to his cheek, smiling softly. 

#mario #luigi #mario and luigi #wario #waluigi #wario and waluigi #princess peach #mario x peach #slight mareach #s-creations #fanfiction #yellow purple red green #yprg

[pfhwrittes]

riffing off the poll i reblogged re: your blorbos doing top surgery. so these are some vague headcannons on how the members of tf141 would look after a reader post top surgery.

pairings: gaz x reader, soap x reader, simon x reader (romantic), john price & reader (platonic).

warnings: gaz refers to reader as babe and calls the reader handsome.

note: i’ve written this reader to be a trans man but can be read as anyone who wants top surgery. also i am firmly in the camp that you DON’T have to have surgery to be considered transgender or to have your gender respected. fuck knows it’s a hard enough process here in the UK, i can’t imagine my healthcare being stuck behind what is essentially a paywall.

gaz would be a sweetheart. he’d get you drinks and painkillers. he’d move your cushions/pillows around as much as you wanted. he’d pretend not to see when you burst into tears over pain/relief/a weird sense of mourning and fear. he’d even help you to the bathroom and linger outside the door (unlocked, he’d insist on it being unlocked) in case you need help with anything. the man gets your favourite takeaway and doesn’t make a fuss when you only eat a little bit of it because you’re feeling a bit nauseous from the meds you’re on. checks on your drains and dressings and soothes you when you catch sight of the swelling. he reassures you with forehead and cheek kisses when you’re upset and reassures you with a gentle babe you’re so handsome and brave, i can’t wait for you to show off your chest when you’re feeling better.

price would handle it from a more professional perspective (i am not saying reader would be in the military but i am saying that the man deals with paperwork most of the time anyway so he’d handle it for your work). he’s already sent off copies of your medical note from the surgeon, he’s filled in the paperwork to get sick pay. less hands on than gaz (but that’s only because i can’t see price with a trans man in a romantic or sexual way) so he doesn’t overstep but as your friend he’ll bring you food if you ask and painkillers too. checks in with you and sends you book recommendations, music recommendations and the occasional meme (don’t try to tell me he wouldn’t send you memes. that man is a millennial he knows what a fucking meme is) when you’re well enough to complain about being bored.

simon would be kind of a dick about it. listen i don’t make the rules but he would. he’s supportive enough. he’d give you a ride back from the hospital and get you to wherever is the most comfortable but he’s a bit shit at looking after you (the man has no practice outside of emergency medical care). you’d have to text him to get you a drink or painkillers. healthy nutritious food? no. what flavour pot noodle do you want? never mind you’re getting a bombay bad boy because that’s all he’s got in the cupboard. emotionally he’s not great at expressing how he’s feeling about your recovery so he comes across as gruff but that’s mostly because he’s repressing a whole bunch of trauma and fear that things won’t go well. he won’t touch you apart from holding your hand when you ask because he’s worried he’ll mess up your stitches but still it comes across as a bit cold.

soap the darling man is just so fucking excited for you. it’s a bit much actually while you’re still recovering and yeah you end up snapping and it hurts his feelings a little but he’ll try to play it off as not a big deal. he’s just so happy for you (and for himself because he cannot wait to get his hands on you now that you’ll let him because your chest is the way you want it)! super affectionate, peppers you with kisses all over your face. he’s similar to gaz in that he’s all about making you as comfortable as possible and tries to preempt any requests you have (gets you bottles of water and can of irn-bru because that’s what he always wants when he’s feeling under the weather, grabs you as many snacks as you want). unlike gaz he’s enough of a freak to insist on being in the bathroom with you when you need to go, he says it’s to make sure you’re safe but he’s definitely using it as an excuse to touch you as much as possible until you’re fully healed up.

#cod fic #ftm!reader #binders and boyfriends #kyle garrick x reader #simon riley x reader #john mactavish x reader #john price and reader #kg #jp #jm #sr

[maccreadysbaby]

Fo4 males when they’re sick? How do they act? How do they react to soles help? Danse post bb please!

coming up, hot and ready

Male Companions When They’re Sick

Danse is a soldier — all his life he’s been trained to suck it up and move on unless he simply can’t, so that’s what he does for the most part. He might be slower, and a bit flushed, but he does what he would normally do even if he doesn’t feel well. It gets worse after Blind Betrayal, because he’s somehow convinced himself he suddenly can’t get sick and doesn’t need to be fussed over. Even if he’s sick to the point where he would’ve told his commanding officer in years past, now he forces himself through it. He will incessantly turn down Sole’s offers to help, and will continue until they basically do it against his will. He won’t complain, but he will remind them often that he is just a machine and isn’t actually sick. But he won’t argue much past that. Will thank Sole a lot, probably adding “even though I no longer require it” or something else self destructive. But, deep down, he really appreciates Sole’s help and it makes him feel… seen.

Sole won’t know Deacon is sick until after, when he tells them in casual conversation. It’s no secret he doesn’t really take care of himself, there’s always some part of him that feels bad at any given time. It’s something he ignores daily, so when he’s sick, it’s extremely easy and convenient for him to simply ignore it. Sole would only know he’s sick at the time he’s sick if it is particularly bad. (Which usually entails fainting or vomiting — the things he can’t hide so easily.) He’ll try and convince them he’s fine, but the fact that he just heaved up a liver usually gives it away. He doesn’t argue with Sole much about taking care of him. He actually becomes pretty apologetic, thinking of himself as a burden on them. But, nonetheless, Sole’s support and willingness to care for him remind him of Barbara, and can even make him a teeny bit emotional if his fever is high enough. But he usually doesn’t remember things if he has a high fever, so it’s okay.

Gage gets irritable when he doesn’t feel good. Well… more irritable than normal. His fuse is like, ten times shorter than usual and he will not hesitate to snap at literally anyone who breaths near him the wrong way. He will be in denial about his sickness until he can’t anymore. Sole will get earfuls about how he isn’t a child and blah blah blah while they take care of him, but honestly, he’s just a whiny little kid and he would just get more irritated if they actually listened to him and stopped taking care of him. He acts all tough but really them taking care of him reminds him of his family before he left and he finds it very comforting.

Hancock doesn’t get sick often, but when he does, it’s usually pretty severe. He’ll try to keep it quiet for a while but will probably just end up telling Sole anyways. If Sole has already proven to him that they’ll be there for him, which they most likely have, he’ll immediately just turn into a bedridden patient. He loves every second of them taking care of him and might just continue to be “sick” for a while. He won’t be upset if they’d rather keep him at a distance, but he would rather just be close to them and be held because it really does make him feel better.

Where MacCready grew up, if someone was sick, all of the other kids avoided them like the plague, except for Lucy (not his wife) and Bumble, the resident medical professionals in Little Lamplight. He’s taken care of himself more than once and, if Sole wants to avoid him, he won’t hold it against them. He hates being sick, too. He is the most likely companion to straight up tell Sole he doesn’t feel good. If they want to avoid him, fine, if they want to help him, fine. If they choose to take care of him, though, they better be ready. Because his normal complaining is amplified by a thousand and he gets pretty delusional if his fevers above, like, 100. Gets extremely emotional. May accidentally call them Lucy because she was the last one who cared for him like that. Will probably cry. A lot.

Nick is most likely to immediately tell Sole he feels off. He’s definitely the most capable of taking care of himself and usually will dismiss their help in fear of them catching whatever he has. But he will eventually let them take care of him. He is pretty normal when sick, not whiny or annoyed like the others. He’s just plain old Nick, probably still working on some type of file in bed and thanking Sole for all the small things they do.

Preston goes into denial immediately. He’s fine, he just needs some water. He can’t just stop working because people don’t just stop being in need. He has major survivors guilt. He is most likely to overcompensate when he’s sick, pushing himself just a little harder, doing just a little more. He simply will not listen to Sole’s pleads for him to lay down until it gets to the point that he feels like or does faint. And Sole will practically have to tie him to a bed or couch to keep him from getting up and going back to work. He feels so guilty for being sick. So guilty. Sole will have to talk him into staying in, and if he does, he will feel horrible about it. But he appreciates Sole for taking care of him and will — eventually — stop talking about working and let them care for him. But he’ll try hard to make up for it after.

X6-88 doesn’t get sick very often, if ever. Sole probably won’t even know. He doesn’t change his demeanor in the slightest unless he feels really, really bad. At that point he’ll usually just zap into the Institute, but if it’s been blown up, he’ll most likely just deal with it by himself. Sole will probably have to manhandle him in order to give any kind of support, but if he’s sick enough that he tells them, it probably won’t be very hard. He never shuts up about what he should be doing, but don’t try to console him — he knows he needs time to recover properly, Sole doesn’t need to tell him that. He’ll just say they’re being annoying.

#danse fo4 #danse fallout 4 #paladin danse #deacon fo4 #fallout deacon #deacon fallout 4 #fo4 deacon #fo4 gage #porter gage fo4 #fo4 porter gage #porter gage #mayor hancock #fo4 hancock #john hancock #john hancock fo4 #hancock #rj maccready #maccready #fo4 maccready #duncan maccready #nick valentine #nick fo4 #valentine #valentine fo4 #preston garvey fo4 #fo4 preston #preston garvey #preston #fo4 x6 88 #x6 88

[pompadourpink]

Hi mom I'm going to spend three weeks in France in a few months and I was wondering what things I should know so I don't upset anyone lol thanks for all you do

Hello dear,

Exciting!

We are attached to politeness. Say hello when you start a conversation with anyone (including salespeople), enter any type of professional place (bakery, small store, waiting room) and to the bus driver. Walking up to a stranger and immediately asking a question is extremely rude and we will be rude back (which explains our reputation - tourists were unknowingly crass first).

When talking to strangers/salespeople: the right question is something like Bonjour (pause until they make eye contact and say it back), excusez-moi de vous déranger, je ne trouve pas le sucre/je cherche la rue Victor Hugo/---, est-ce que vous pouvez m'aider? (...). Merci beaucoup, bonne journée, au revoir.

If you don't speak French, learn how to pronounce Bonjour, excusez-moi de vous déranger, est-ce que vous parlez anglais? (and after a possible no: C'est pas grave, merci quand même, au revoir) so you don't look like a donkey.

Blend in. Don't be loud, respect people's space (and escalator/pavement laws), avoid intrusive questions, bashing the country + money talk. No PJs at the store. You are trying to befriend cats; "my way or the highway" is not going to work.

Use the right pronouns. Level 1: say Vous to any professional, older strangers (including people's relatives, who will say Tu back), and Tu to friends, their friends, any kid or teen. Level 2: most likely say Tu to people your age, unless their energy calls for something else. Level 3: say Tu in non-formal places (bar, tattoo parlour) regardless of age. Cheat code: avoid making a choice by saying things like Comment ça va? instead of Comment tu vas?

Random tourist advice:

In cafés/restaurants: we don't really tip, cooks aren't used to personalised orders, and waiters will leave you alone (no refills, small talk, pet names) unless you lift your hand, make eye contact and mouth "Excusez-moi". You can pay with cash or a debit card but I wouldn't recommend checks.

Other cities are fine but if you are using public transportation in Paris, take notes or download la RATP's app beforehand: you'll often need to take two or three subways to get somewhere and there is no info inside the station.

Travel light and pick trusty trainers, cobblestone doesn't like heels. Watch your step. Men pee outside a lot and people don't pick up dog poo.

Be aware of pickpockets. Zip your pockets, keep your bag on the side or the front, avoid flaunting luxury items or looking/dressing/acting like a professional tourist, and for the love of God, don't go to the Champs Elysées at night.

Catcalling and street harassment are unfortunately common. Feel free to hook up, condoms shouldn't be a problem but don't expect to find a husband, your typical French Tinder match isn't looking for love.

If you're into skincare, pharmacies are your wet dream.

If you want to travel, take a TGV (very fast train, to book preferably weeks to months before) to get to other cities in 1-5h. London via the Eurostar is 2h30 away and many capitals are a 2h cheap flight away. Going to Disneyland takes about an hour from downtown Paris to Marne-La-Vallée.

If you need medical assistance, call the 112 (European emergency number) or the 18 (fire brigade, good eggs) and the police, the 17 (take forever to answer).

At the moment, there's a weird thing happening in France where young people (mostly girls) get spiked with needles in nightclubs. Keep yourself safe.

Many museums are free/stores offer discounts if you're under 25 and you get a free ride on a bateau-mouche if your birthday is the same week.

Carry an umbrella and sunglasses regardless of the season.

More: restaurant guide, why won't the French let me practice my French, list of Parisian museums + Planétarium + movie theatres.

Hope this helps! x

#ask #visiting #culture #france

[bil-daddy]

Salutations Mr Bildad, Bildad the Shuhite, Bildaddy sir.

I'm so so sorry to bother you, or be a nuisance, but everything is getting on top of me lately and you give excellent advice.

Basically, the last 12-18 months have been awful - I'm acutely aware that in terms of what's happening in the world I'm pretty blessed 🙏🏻 However within around 12 months experiencing; a miscarriage, 4 bereavements, one parent being rushed into hospital, the other needing surgery (both are doing Ok now thank God 🙏🏻), two surgeries of my own within six months - neither of which have improved what they should have, chronic pain, multiple diagnoses - most of which were unexpected & should have been diagnosed a looonnnnggg time ago, reactions to any& all medications, finding out physio will be necessary for the rest of my life, a very upsetting break up, discovering people who were supposed to be friends can't be trusted...... Let's not forget financial issues due to being unable to work as result of illness etc .... I am losing hope that things are ever going to get better 😔

I'm so so sorry for offloading all this on you but work said they could no longer offer counselling which is infuriating because the counsellor was amazing! Sadly she isn't taking on any private patients for several months so we had to discontinue sessions for the foreseeable 😔

I'm so sorry but I don't really have any other people to talk to right now, my fiancé was my best friend so in a sense it's almost a double loss? Sorry this is pretty pathetic 😪

Yikes. And here I thought @blameless-job had it bad.

So, first off, let me tell you how sorry I am for all your losses. Any of which on their own are extremely painful, but all at the same time? Nobody should have to weather a storm like that. I am so proud of you, just for being here. You're incredibly strong for what you're surviving, even though you shouldn't even have to survive it in the first place.

So don't apologize cause there's nothing pathetic about reaching out for help when you're going through something--or multiple somethings, in your case. In fact, it's exactly the thing you need to do. A lot has been dumped onto your plate, so it makes sense you need to offload it.

I know your former counsellor isn't able to help you at the moment, but maybe they can refer you to someone else, because you deserve a professional (in psychology, not shoemaking and obstetrics) to help you through these tragedies. They might be able to get you a referral.

(If you want to try to find a counsellor on your own, there's NHS Therapy Services in the UK, and SAMHSA National Helpline in the US.)

In the meantime, though, I'll do my best.

If you're worried that things are never going to get better, you shouldn't be. I mean I understand why you are, but the fact is, as dark as this is to say, you might actually be at your lowest point right now. Which means, as awful as things are right now, things can only go up from here.

You got some new diagnoses, which suck to have, especially when they should have been caught earlier, but now that you have a diagnosis, you can start getting treated.

You're six months out from two surgeries and haven't gotten better, but in six more months, or even six weeks, you might start to see some improvement. Plus, once you start the phsyio therapy you now know you need, you can troubleshoot with the physical therapist on how to make more improvements on the issues you had surgery for, as well as the chronic pain. The physical therapist might also be able to refer you to a counsellor as well, if your previous counsellor isn't able to give you one.

But that's just the physical stuff.

It's the emotional stuff that hurts more. Losing loved ones, be it to death, breakup, or just realizing your friends aren't really friends. That kind of pain is even more difficult to deal with.

For the bereavements, it might be helpful remember the good times you shared with these people and the things you loved most about them. They may be gone now, but those memories aren't and they're even more valuable now that they are the parts of your loved ones that are still with you.

And when you're living your life, and you see or hear something that reminds you of them, like a favourite song, or the kind of car they used to drive, that's another way they're still with you.

You might cry the first few, or few hundred times you remember them, but after awhile you'll start smiling more and crying less when you think about them.

For the miscarriage, it's a bit tougher, since you're grieving what could have been, rather than what was. But it's still a loss as valid as any other loss of a loved one, so you have every right to grieve it as such. You have my deepest sympathy for the loss of your child. And the miscarriage is why your fiancé and you are no longer together, you have my deepest sympathy for that, too.

It would be easy for me to say "the trash took itself out" when it comes to ex-fiancés and fake friends, but much harder for you to actually feel that way.

You have the right to grieve the friendships and your relationship ending. To miss them even though they hurt you. To feel hurt, and betrayed, and angry, and still love them anyway, even if you can't be around them anymore. It's okay to hate them, too, if you need to. Not forever. But in the short term, it can be cathartic and exactly what you need.

It'll take time for all these overwhelming and conflicting feelings to fade, and it's possible they'll never completely be gone. But you will learn to live alongside them until you forget they're even there.

You will feel better, I promise you. Een if the light at the end of the tunnel looks like a distant star right now, you'll reach it.

So have an ox rib (platonic) for the journey

Hope this helps, even just a little. Mutuals, feel free to send good vibes @ashbunny2027's way

#bildaddy answers #counselling from Bildaddy #results may vary #bildad the shuhite #bildad the shuhite army #bildaddy #have an ox rib (platonic) #oh bildad we're really in it now #oh bildad the shuhite we're really in it now #bildad my beloved #bildad nation #bildad brainrot #bildad #bildad the shuite

[xiaoscarasimp]

Cat Boi 3 (Now with more cat boys

As you and Scaramouche sat down after dinner one day to watch your favorite anime, your phone starts buzzing. You look down at it and notice that it was your co-worker Zhongli calling, which is odd since he's never done this before. 

"Hello?" You say hesitantly into the phone. 

"Ah, yes, this is Zhongli speaking. Is y/n there?" The voice on the other end sounds very professional; he's always been the serious type.

"Yes, it is."

"Oh, good. I must respectfully ask a favor of you. You see, I am about to have my fiance move in with me, but I'm worried my cat boy will impede the movers. I was wondering if you could watch over him for about a month. Don't worry, you'll be compensated for food, medical, or anything else he might need."

"Z-Zhongli," you stammer. "Let me ask Scara first. I know I've mentioned getting him a friend, but I do feel like he should get some say in the matter." Scaramouche looks over at you with a puzzled look at the mention of his name.

"Excellent. I look forward to hearing a favorable response." Zhongli hangs up and you turn to Scaramouche, trying to figure out how to breach the subject.

Luckily for you, he could read the room when he wanted to. "So, what's this about a possible interruption?" He asks, ears flicking with displeasure.

"So, my co-worker Zhongli asked me to look after his cat for a bit. It won't be permanent just for about a month or so while his fiance moves in," you explain gently. Your anxiety and excitement were running high because you really wanted Scaramouche to have a friend while you were at work along with the fact you didn't want to let your co-worker down.

"Will it only be for a month?" He asks, ears flat against his head, tail wrapped around your wrist. His eyes showed uncertainty, fear and perhaps a little something else. "As long as he remembers that I am top cat and that you're mine and only mine then I guess its ok!" His mood suddenly changed from unsure to pompous in the blink of an eye, causing you to chuckle. 

"Now remember Scara, you have to play nice and also don't get upset if you two dont like the same foods." 

You sent Zhongli a text saying that you could watch over his cat boy for a bit and he replied back rather quickly with a smiley emoji. As you and Scaramouche were watching anime, his tail never left your wrist, anxious because it was one of the last nights you two would have alone together for a while. 

In preparation for Zhongli's cat boy moving in, you decide to prepare Scaramouche's bed room to host two people. Needless to say, Scaramouche wasn't too happy about that. He threw an absolute fit about having to share a room, but you ended up pointing out that he barely slept in there anyways;he mostly slept with you in your bed and only his clothing was in there. 

"If it makes you feel better, I can move some of your clothes into my room? I can also get a spare mattress for you as well." You offer.

His ears perk up. "Do what you want." He waved his hand like shooing off a fly, but his ears and tail betray his actual emotions yet again. 

The move in day arrived quickly, and you heard the door bell ring, opening it to see Zhongli in a white shirt with a tie and some slacks and a cat boy hiding behind him, who was a little bit shorter than Scaramouche. He had black hair with green tips, sharp almond colored eyes, and red eyeliner, not unlike how your very own cat boy would do his. His ears flicked around nervously, you noticed they had slightly greenish tips. This cat boy was dressed rather comfortably, wearing baggy black pants, a skin tight sleeveless white shirt that had the silhouette of clouds on it and black slip on shoes. 

"Come in guys!" You smiled. "Hey, Scara! Come on down and meet the houseguests." 

You barely hear Scaramouche come down stairs, but he let you know he was there with a loud "hmph" when he saw the other cat boy. 'Oh boy,' you thought. 'This better not get messy.' He sat down at the table, tapping his fingers, ignoring the two new people in the house. 

"Thank you for accepting the favor y/n," Zhongli says. "Oh yes. Introductions are in order. This is Xiao. He's a bit shy, but shouldn't cause any problems." The cat boy was still hiding behind his master, ears and eyes alert, still scanning the area for potential threats. Xiao tried to give a polite smile, but faltered when he saw Scaramouche sitting at the table, tapping his finger while giving the guests a mean side eye. 

"Hi,  Xiao. I'm y/n and I hope we can all get along. That grumpy little thing over there is Scaramouche, or Scara for short," you introduce yourself formally. "Tell me, what would you like for dinner tonight? I can make just about anything. Scara prefers seafood, but if there's something you don't like let me know."

Scaramouche scowled at the fact you said Xiao can call him Scara for short; that was your name for him, and only you could use it. He really did have a mean possessive streak that you'd have to scold him about later. 

"...I love almond tofu, however I've been curious about seafood, but Mr. Mor -I mean Zhongli despises seafood. I don't eat a lot of other meat, though." Xiao timidly says, still not making eye contact with you. 

"Sure!" You beamed. "Any flavors you don't like? I have some yellow snapper in the fridge, and it won't be too fishy. I fileted them yesterday so they're fresh." Xiao nodded and you told Zhongli and Xiao to have a seat on the couch while you cook. 

Scaramouche was still sitting at the table, a scowl on his face because it felt like the new cat boy and his master were taking all of your attention; it was going to be a long month. When you walked over to the kitchen, he ended up following you under the pretense of "helping" you and by helping, he means impeding your way by accidentally knocking things over with his tail or being extra affectionate by hugging you while you gather food and spices.

Starting to get a bit irritated, you turn around to Scaramouche and tell him to go sit on the couch or at the table at the very least. "Maybe you can get to know Xiao a little bit as well." He gave you one last hug and sat down at the table, grumbling the entire time.

You had found a blackened snapper recipe the day before and wanted to try it out. You coat the fish in the blackening seasoning, which to your delight smelled pretty spicy. Hopefully this won't be too much for the cat boys, but honestly, this is the only way you'll eat fish if it's drowned in spices. A thought crossed your mind: what if we tried this seasoning on chicken? Your mouth started salivating at the thought of blackened chicken.

Once you've seasoned the fish, you put it in the over for a little bit and you start making the side dishes. Rice was always a safe bet, but you needed a veggie to pair with it for a balanced meal. You remembered you had some edamame in the freezer. Scaramouche comes over and attempts to distract you by headbutting your shoulder, but you pay him no mind other than petting his head gently. 

"Scara, dinner will be ready in five minutes. Have you talked to Xiao or Zhongli at all yet?" You ask, keeping an eye on the food timers. 

"Pffft, no. Why would I want to talk to people intruding *my* space? That Xiao fucker doesn't seem like he's all that and Zhongli has tried to talk to me about tea." Scaramouche rolls his eyes.

"I thought you liked tea though?"

"Yeah, I do but that does not mean I want to chat at some random stranger about tea,” Scaramouche rolls his eyes.  

"Either way, I'm gonna need you to behave. Can you help me set the table really quick?" You ask as all the timers go off. Scaramouche rolls his eyes yet again, but begrudgingly grabs plates, forks, and knives.  

"Hey, Zhongli," you call over to the tall man sitting in the living room. "I know Xiao said that you don't like fish, but I don't have much else to offer you. Will you be fine for tonight?"

Zhongli chuckles and tells you he has his fiance cooking dinner at home. Xiao and Scaramouche roll their eyes, to which you chuckle.

You plate the food and bring it over to the two cat boys who are just reveling in the smell of the fish. Scaramouche starts eating first, to which you remind him to do the pre dinner ritual while Xiao knows the custom and waits. After you guys do the traditional Inazuma "ittadakimasu," Xiao takes a small bite of the snapper, eyes wide, and trying to decide if he likes it or not. Scaramouche, on the other hand, starts devouring the rice first, followed by a few bites of the fish; neither of the boys seemed interested in the edamame, which was fine by you since it was your favorite part. 

"I-I think I like fish," Xiao murmurs quietly, you almost couldn't hear him. 

"That's great!" You beamed. "One of these days I'll try to make almond tofu. Can't guarantee it'll be any good, but we can give it our best shot."

After you finish dinner, you ask Scaramouche to help with cleaning up to which he gave you a bit of a hard time, but then reluctantly agreed. He complained every step of the way, griping about why Xiao wasn't helping or how the food stuck to the plates while washing them off. In response, you gave him a hard stare, and he almost immediately shut up, his tail flicked in agitation. 

"Oh yeah, I almost forgot: we need to bring Xiao's stuff in. Hey Zhongli, can you help me bring stuff in?" You ask the taller man. 

Surprisingly, Xiao did not bring that much: only a duffle bag full of clothes, shampoo, and other toiletries, as well as a giant stuffed animal in the shape of a bird. You chuckle to yourself. Who knew the seemingly stoic catboy would have a giant stuffed animal? You couldn't help but wonder if he brought enough, but Zhongli mentioned that the catboy didn't ask for a lot nor sought out anything. 

"So Xiao, here's your room!" You say as you lead him to the guest bedroom. "Let me know if I need to get anything for you or if you don't like something."

"You weren't that nice with me," Scaramouche grumbles under his breath. You pretend like you didn't hear him, although you shot back a glare that said "shut the fuck up or else." 

"...it looks great," Xiao mumbles. "Will the other one be staying in the same room? I notice two beds."

"Hell no," Scaramouche scoffs. "I'll be staying with y/n because I was here first." He sticks his tongue out, causing Xiao to hide behind you; he wasn't scared, just put off by the other's attitude. 

"Scara," you sigh. "Would it kill you to be nice for five minutes? Or least not be a freaking jerk to our guest?" 

"Pretty sure it would." 

As the two cat boys are glaring at each other, Zhongli takes his leave. "Be good for y/n ok, Xiao? Despite the rambunctious one, I believe this to be the best place to stay while Childe and I move all of our stuff to his new place." Xiao flinches at the mention of the other man in Zhongli's life. He was loud, annoying, and honestly a bit of a jerk. Kind reminds him of the catboy he's going to be living with in a way, although Scaramouche seemed more introverted and catty than Childe. 

The three of you bid Zhongli farewell, and once the door shuts, Scaramouche makes a beeline for your room, presumably claiming over half the bed for himself. You pinch the bridge of your nose in frustration because you wanted to at least let them get to know each other, or at least acknowledge each other, but that wasn't happening. Xiao flicks his tail as he slinks off to the guest bedroom, closing the door behind him; it was going to be a long month wasn't it? 

When you get to your room, Scaramouche is already in his pajamas, curled up, seemingly asleep with his ear twitching ever so slightly and his mouth slightly open, although you could tell he was just pretending to be asleep. He usually pulled this act when he knew you were angry at him to try and get on your good side, and the worst part was- it usually worked. He was just so adorable when he wasn't berating you or being a jerk in general. Tonight though, he was in deep trouble. 

"Scaramouche Balladeer the Sixth." You say sternly. "I know you are not asleep. You know you're in some deep shit." He tsked, his ruse ruined. 

"Look, I don't like sharing you or my space," He pouts, sitting up. "The sooner he's gone, the better. Luckily, he seems to be the quiet, obedient type, so there's that going for him." 

"Scara, please, will you at least try to make a friend?" 

Scaramouche sits deep in thought for a bit, interrupted by small squeaking sounds;almost like crying. You both whip your heads around trying to figure out the source of the sounds, only to realize they were coming from Xiao's room. You rush over to his room while Scaramouche stays on the bed, pouting because you left him again for a random person or cat boy again. Knocking on Xiao's door, the sounds stop, but still muffled sniffling persisted. 

"Xiao?" You call softly. Scaramouche stares at the door, annoyed that something interrupt his time with you. "Xiao are you ok?" 

You open the door and Xiao almost falls into your chest, cheeks stained with tears; his ears are flat against his head and tail drooped; he was clearly not having a good night. The green haired cat boy looks up at you, eyes wide, and almost confused as if he didn't know where he was. 

"What happened?" He mumbles, wiping his eyes, realizing that he still had tears at the corners of his eyes. 

"Y/n heard you crying and was concerned about you and you disturbed our alone time," Scaramouche spits out, leaning against the wall.  

"Scaramouche, " you groan. "I was actually laying into him for being a jerk. Are you ok? Did you want to come sleep in my room tonight? Scara and I won't bite. Ok fine *I* won't bite but he might try." Scaramouche glares at both you and Xiao before heading off to the bedroom.

"I think I'm fine," Xiao responds after the other cat boy disappears. "Thank you for your concern, I'm just not used to sleeping here yet."

"That's a-ok! I'll leave my door open in case you need me. Good night, Xiao."

"Good night y/n."

As per nightly routine, you gently stroke the top of Scaramouche's head to help calm yourself before drifting off to sleep. His purrs and ear flicks make it all the more soothing.  

Why were cat boys so damn adorable?!

The next morning, you wake up,  feeling strangely warm and notice that you have not one but two cat boys in your bed. Scaramouche was sleeping in front of you,  snuggled against your chest, tail wrapped around your right wrist. His breathing suggests that he is very much in a deep sleep and it would probably be wise not to wake him. The other source of heat was from Xiao snuggled up against your back, clinging on to your shirt. You notice his tail attempted to wrap itself around your leg, but it just ended up being draped over your thigh. If you had turned around, you'd notice that he still had tear stained cheeks, but otherwise looked pretty serene. 

Luckily, it was your day off, so you were in no hurry to move, but you usually liked to try and get breakfast started as soon as you woke up. Come to think of it, what was for breakfast? Bacon and eggs? Salted fish? Hashbrowns and grits? OK the last one was not appealing to you in the slightest. 

As you're lost in your thoughts,  the two cat boys start to stir. "Good morning Scaramouche.  Good morning Xiao," you greet them as Scaramouche and Xiao start rubbing their eyes. It was so adorable!! "What did you two want for breakfast? I was thinking of bacon, eggs, and toast personally." 

"Anything is fine by me," Xiao sleepily mumbles. 

"I want y/n," Scaramouche slurs, still very much half asleep. "Warm, fluffy, and slightly salty." 

"I'm going to ignore you, Scara." You were met with a tongue click. He was trying to get under your skin, and it was almost working, but you knew food comes first. 

"Now, if you guys would let me get up and start cooking, that'll be great," you continue on; Scaramouche's tail was coiled even tighter around your wrist, and you had to pull slightly to try and make him let go; he almost didn’t give in, but in the end, you won that struggle. Xiao’s tail was still over your thigh, but luckily he did not object to you moving it slightly so you could get up to make food. 

About half way through you finishing up breakfast, the cat boys drag themselves to the kitchen, tails drooping at first, but once they smelled the bacon and eggs, their tails and ears perked up slightly. Scaramouche reluctantly grabbed plates and utensils for the three of you , which you were extremely grateful for. Xiao sat at the table, too scared to make conversation with Scaramouche or even you; it was his first morning in a new place after all. He kept making glances at the antisocial boy, trying to figure out how to attempt to get along.

“What are you staring at?” Scaramouche spat out, tail swished angrily. He wasn’t used to having to deal with other people besides you in the morning and he hated people staring at him for no reason. 

“...nothing,” Xiao mumbles, ears drooping. Attempt at conversation: failed. Then again, he didn’t enjoy interacting with others too much. Xiao was hoping you and Scaramouche would be entertaining to be with at least, however you seemed to be fine, but the other one…maybe not so much. 

“Look, I don’t enjoy conversation to just fill the silence, especially first thing in the morning. If you have something to say, say it outright, otherwise leave me alone.” You groan internally at hearing Scaramouche say this to Xiao. Why couldn’t they get along? Was it because they seemed so similar that they hated each other? Was it because cat boys just don’t get along at first?

“Sounds good to me. I don’t enjoy talking much anyways, but Zhongli said I should try to be more sociable.” Oh good, they’re getting along, kinda. 

“Ok boys, breakfast is ready!” You start serving the scrambled eggs with cheese, bacon, and buttered toast to the hungrily waiting cat boys, who were already grabbing their forks in anticipation. “Scara, calm down, attacking the eggs as they’re coming off the pan won’t make them go in your mouth any faster. Xiao, don’t fill up on just bread, you need protein as well.” Gods, it was like taking care of children some days, although you couldn’t blame them: the food smelled divine if you said so yourself. 

You three ate in relative silence, like most mornings, although you were silently hoping that having an additional person there would help ease the atmosphere; the problem was it almost made it more stifling. Scaramouche kept looking at you, trying to see whether you favored him or the new cat boy better, while Xiao was trying to find the right time and words to try and break the silence. You, meanwhile, had barely sat down after serving breakfast to the two silent boys and making yourself a plate, so trying to make the breakfast table more lively or even hospitable was a bit out of the question for now. 

Hopefully soon, everyone could learn to get along; maybe Xiao could teach Scaramouche how to be more respectful and maybe Scaramouche could help break Xiao out of his shell. It was going to be a long, long, month. 

~~~~~~~~

Writers block is a bitch and trying to find a nice wrapping up point is also a bitch

But holy shit 3k words of freaking cat boys because...reasons

Might do an H patch eventually but def more catboy fluff

#genshin impact #fanfic #cat boy #genshin #Scaramouche #Xiao #Catboi

[ladyriot]

Snippets from the longfic I've been tinkering with for ages and have still not made work in a way I would be happy to write. Tentative title is The Revisionist. Case-fic, angst-fest, pining galore... set after the series ends. Jane wants one last case with Maura and comes to regret it.

~~

Maura's entrance is announced by the muffled sound of heels across carpet. Jane stands from her crouch to make room for her to get close to the body.

Maura betrays almost nothing, in a professional mood that forces humanity out as best as possible because otherwise this job gets too much. But there's something about the way she's holding her mouth that means this one's getting to her, which means this is one of those times that Jane needs to put herself in the autopsy room, a distracting force so Maura won't get too in her head. It means Jane should show up on Maura's porch later and act like it's her who needs comfort tonight. 

She's hit now with a bitter strike of loss. Who's gonna take care of Maura when she's not around, someone who won't hover and worry and hug like her mother always tried to in times it would make Maura skittish to be touched by any hands but Jane's? Who would make sure Maura was okay when she didn't want to admit she wanted company, didn't want to ask and risk sounding needy? 

Jane resolves to call every night, no matter what, be ready to switch to video at the slightest hitch in a voice, as Maura takes careful stock of the body. 

"I can't estimate time of death here," Maura says finally, voice measured and even. "I'll need to do the autopsy first."

Maura finally meets Jane's eyes. "Do you have an ID?"

"No," Jane says. "Nothing on her. Anything you can tell me before I canvass?"

"There should be more blood on the victim," Maura says, leaning further over the body. "Look at the spray, how none of it is on her face. The blood might've been wiped off. I'll look for traces of solvents that might've been used. If we're lucky, fibres."

"Thanks," Jane says, taking a step back. "Killer was really angry. How'd he find the calmness to clean up after himself? And why just her face? You think he knew her?"

"I can't possibly tell. I'm gonna let them get her back to the lab, okay?"

Jane nods dutifully, softening her eyes in a way Maura can read as reassurance. They've become fluent in each other. Maura gives an almost imperceptible nod of her head and walks out of the room as if unbothered.

~~

"Are you doing the autopsy tonight?"

"In the morning," Maura says. "Just an external exam for now, get everything processed."

Jane nods. "You look like something's off about it, though."

"Surgery," Maura says softly. "She has indicators of cosmetic surgery. Look at this scar under the chin. It's where chin shaving would be done. There are also indications of filler." 

"So you're upset because a stranger didn't like her face?"

"No, Jane," Maura says. "I'm upset because these scars are fresh. The swelling must have just recently gone down."

"Are you saying the killer did surgery on her?"

"You know I can't say that, Jane," Maura says. "I can tell you the technique is slightly antiquated. It wouldn't likely be done this way by a recent graduate of the last five or six years. And it's a little less precise than I'm used to seeing in medical books. It wouldn't be out of the question."

"Fuck, that's sick," Jane says. "That's deranged."

Maura doesn't even correct her language. "Dental records might help us see when her jaw was altered. And I've sent swabs of her face to check for solvent and any trace off for processing already."

~~

Maura leans against the window, remembers it's unsafe, (car safety wasn't even tested on women) and sits up straight again, rolling her skull back into the headrest. She's drained. Jane drives carefully, tapping her non-driving foot in a staccato rhythm that only makes Maura sleepier as her breaths elongate into four counts. But she doesn't want to go to bed. Her fatigue is at war with the potential loss of Jane. She swallows hard at the remembrance of Jane's words on video, wondering when she ever got the chance to record it. It'd been so sweet, and Jane had met her eyes in a way that told her it was for her. Mostly for her. It had made her stomach clench. 

Maura'd done her own video after washing the body for the autopsy the next day. Kent had returned as she was finishing and helped her put it in cold storage for them to pull out in the morning. She'd paced her office, unsure what to say and Kent had told her to say what's in her heart. But her heart just thundered a pulse of Jane's name, over and over. 

"You woke something up in me that I thought wasn't there at all. This ability to connect, to love and be loved both openly and entirely. And I love you. I am willing to speculate, just this once, that I couldn't stop if I tried." 

Maura, for the first time, was glad there was so much ambiguity in the word love. And yet still she felt transparent, felt like Kent could read it on her, see exactly how it is she loved Jane.

"How was that?" 

"Good" 

"I'm really sad." And she had felt deeply hollow. So hollow that she went and cancelled her plane ticket. She had wanted to avoid watching Jane leave by booking her trip to begin before Jane had to go. She could spare a few days witn her to not have to see her walk away from everything that held them together and that lingering… posiibility that Maura had little belief was something she felt alone.

But now they pull up to Maura's driveway. Jane shifts the car into park and Maura watches her arm flex. Her mouth goes dry with a want to ask her inside, to ask her to stay, protect her with those muscled arms. But she won't ask. 

"Thanks for driving me home," she says instead. "I was uncomfortable driving at that estimated blood alcohol content." 

"You're good, Maur," Jane says, stepping out of the car with Maura. 

They head up the stairs together and maybe Maura won't have to ask at all. Maura unlocks the door and steps in, Jane following after and locking and bolting the door. She goes off to put her kit belt in the gun safe. Watching that, how Jane still has it, makes her think. How long is Jane extending her work? It never really made sense for Jane to leave anyway. If she wanted safe, there were safe job positions in Boston. Her family was Boston, her whole life. But still, she wants to leave everything to start again, alone, somewhere new.

Part of Maura has to cover up the instinct to believe that Jane is trying to get away from her. Maybe they spent too much time together. Maybe she was limiting her from the life she actually wanted. Maybe she's noticed the way Maura just can't keep her eyes off her sometimes. 

"Are you planning to stay until this case is solved?" Maura asks lightly, trying to curb the hope from the question.

~~

Maura gets ready for bed in contemplatory silence. But then Jane knocks, dressed in pyjama pants and a tank top.

"Goodnight," Jane says.

"Come here," Maura says, her heart betraying her with its fierce beat.

She hugs Jane, lets herself be held, and the horrors of that day, slowly creeping in in the dark, finally start to blur at the edges. She breathes easier in Jane's arms. Feels so safe. 

"Can I… ?" Jane asks.

Stay. She knows that's what Jane's asking just by how soft and scared it sounds. One of the only things that scared Jane was asking for a vulnerable moment of intimacy. Maura nods against her, then exits her embrace, pulling her by the hand towards the bed and flicking up the sheets on her side as invitation while she slips into the bathroom to finish getting prepared.

Clean and moisturized and brushed, Maura slips into her own side of the bed. "Can I turn off the lights?"

"Yeah," Jane says.

Maura does. "Night, Jane."

"Goodnight."

Maura can feel Jane's fierce warmth already and it lulls her towards sleep. She knows she's going to wake up with those arms wrapped protectively around her. But they never do while she's awake.

#rizzoli and isles #rizzles #rizzoli and isles fanfiction #rizzles snippets feb 2024

[chronicallyblogged]

My friend was curious how the world was alive to me. She asked what a spatula would say. So I told her.

Spatulas aren't very defined and tend to speak more in notions than words. If they get knocked to the ground or are left dirty they are sad and upset. I have multiple spatulas and sometimes one in particular wants to be used. Sometimes one wants to make a certain food, even if i don't want that food. Or to be washed again, even if clean. Or they will want to go in the strawberry holder instead of the cow holder and vice versa.

Then she asked about art. So I told her.

Art can be anything from vague notions suggesting colors or shapes to fully formed pieces speaking to me about what they'd like to look like or where they want to be displayed. What they think about a show or what I'm doing.

Then she went quiet. Then changed the subject.

I think being met with discomfort and mini rejections like these is part of why I learned to eat my feelings. Other people don't understand that I view something as alive so when I react as if they are they get upset and shut me down. Eventually I just learned to shut myself down. For example my therapist doesn't think I allow myself to feel grief. But when you befriend your headphones. Play their favorite music. Take them with you to see the world even if you know they won't be played. Then someone steps on them by accident and they die you aren't permitted to grieve. If you grieve its an overreaction, it's a guilt trip, it's going to far. So eventually you kill the ability to grieve, to feel empathy, to form healthy attachments.

I haven't shared this with my therapist in full detail bc I dont want to be shut down. Even psych professionals don't get this. The only one who has is my psychiatric nurse and she understands I enjoy the depth this gives my world and do not need to be medicated out of it. That that would be more distressing. I probably will tell my therapist soon though.

#psychosis

[trkstrnd]

Neurodivergent 126 anon here. I'd love to hear your thoughts on tarlos and Mateo!

hi anon i cannot believe i didn’t see this sooner but i would love to give you in depth examples of my opinions!!!

disclaimer: i am not a medical or psychiatric professional. do not use my posts or statements as means of diagnosis or medical advice. i am simply a person who struggles with mental illness/neurodivergence and am headcanoning characters that make me happy/that i relate to!!

that being said!! yes!!

mateo:

i firmly believe that mateo is autistic just based off of his social awareness. i know he’s canonically dyslexic, which, according to a quick google search, is strongly associated with autism. also, canonically, he’s an outcast, people look down on him, think he’s stupid, or slow, when really, he looks at things incredibly literally. i think we really see this in 1.07, with his struggles with his exam, finding a safe person inside a safe space and heavily relying on that routine of answering questions with marjan, then being thrown into a completely different situation that he was expecting just to panic. plus, when he got in there, the captain asked him if he needed anything to drink and mateo answered honestly, which got the sentiment of, “it’s sarcasm, einstein.” which is such mateo wasn’t even wrong to assume. in situations like this, before, he’s had people who cared, and he is trying his hardest to relate back to the past experiences he’s had, since most of the time he’s flying blind socially.

plus, mateo is really bad with the non-verbal communication as well. the main time i think about this is the last scene with the 126 in 3.18. when the boys were going to announce that they were engaged, but everyone figured it out before hand, EXCEPT MATEO, because to him, there’s nothing different. it’s just a 126 hang where people want to talk beforehand. he constantly has to be clued in.

plus, he was raised a loner, easily influenced by the actions of others. he feels incredibly strongly but doesn’t know how to express it and reach out. all of this was with marvin. messy room, bad actions, not being able to handle grief, being a “problem child.” they’re all autistic traits.

mateo, to me, is almost textbook autistic, but lmk what y’all think!!

tk:

truthfully, i haven’t done as much research on adhd as i have with asd, but from what i’ve read, it fits for tk very well. i honestly think part of it is why he gets along with carlos so much. tk is very all over the place, except for when he’s working or passionate about something. he’s able to fixate on one thing, and let all the others go for those moments (work, foosball, lou). he also tends to let things in his personal life show much more. he wears his heart on his sleeve. when he was upset owen was depressed, his mom’s passing, his sobriety being tested, issues with carlos, all manifest in places that there should be complete focus, but he has trouble focusing his attention on something unless it is the most important thing to him in that moment, which it often isn’t.

also, he’s impulsive!! i mean, who takes home a lizard from a guys leg?? he often does what he thinks is right no matter the circumstance, like in 2.08 when he goes for the alarm, 1.03 when he follows marjan into the corn despite judd’s orders, the bar fight in the same ep, 2.01 going after the person with the crossbow almost alone until judd offered backup, stealing a firetruck to find his dad, walking out on carlos, pushing carlos when he had nowhere else to place his anger at the situation, breaking up with carlos, you get my point. he struggles with emotional regulation and it manifests in impulsive behavior.

plus, he sucks at sleeping. ex: 3.13, 3.18.

okokokok

carlos:

boy oh boy have i saved the best for last because there’s a REASON i kin him ok.

all rise for the president of autistic carlos nation: me.

carlos is closer to what common folk would call ‘mildly’ autistic (which is not a term i indorse. everyone has different needs and they do not dictate the severity of a disability!!!) he has lower support needs, and because of this, when he was younger and he voiced them to his family, he was met with the cold shoulder.

look i will be a gabriel reyes defender until the day i die and i will never forgive tim for what he did to my favorite dad ever but this is not to say he didn’t have faults because he did!!! and they have a lot to do with how carlos’s autism presents itself.

many people with lower support needs go undiagnosed for years, and because of this they fall into this pit of isolation from their friends and family, and sometimes, themselves. carlos was constantly being reprimanded for being too soft (likely intense, overwhelming feelings, when he was younger. meltdowns.) he didn’t get the support from his family that he needed, so he isolated even more, leading him to believe there was something wrong with him. he couldn’t get along with his sisters because of the age gap, his dad constantly cared for him but in a way that made carlos second guess every decision he made, from coming out to joining apd.

again, he stayed pretty much a loner through childhood. in school, he said all he had was iris, and his shame and mask forced him to make the decision he did when they graduated. he married her because he needed to keep himself from being the burden he perceived himself as for /having needs/.

autistic people tend to take things literally, jump to conclusions. he never asked his parents how they felt after he came out. he just assumed they hated him and tried to soothe that by marrying iris and disregarding himself once again.

it’s why every time he expresses a need, it’s in the form of an argument, or when someone else is upset with him, he brushes it off because his feelings don’t matter because they never have. he masks so much that he almost broke up with tk because he kept brushing off his frustration (2.04), and he held his tongue for so long that he exploded and sounded like an anshole (3.13). he didn’t even tell tk he didn’t want kids until the issue was forced, and i want to highlight how good tk is for him because carlos didn’t run away from the discussion and let tk have whatever he wanted, he recognized the conversation as the collaboration it was!

he has an intense need for routine, he stims all the time (hand rubbing), he tends to have explosive bouts of emotion from masking so long, and he only truly opens up to tk. tk takes care of all of the social stuff, too! carlos’s entire friend group is tk’s friends. tk talks during catan, socializes, while carlos takes on the big, rehearsed speeches.

getting to see him open up with the right person over the last four years has been an absolute delight, and i cannot wait for more.

anyways that’s all for now! if you have any questions about these or others feel free to ask, and if you’re curious about my other neurodivergent 126 hcs, you can check them out here!!

i will forever believe in autistic carlos thank u

#911 lone star #trick talks lone star #carlos reyes #tk strand #mateo chavez #911ls #trick answers asks #trick answers #trick.txt #trick loves their anons #anon #ask #answer #asks #answers #neurodiversity #neurodivergent #126 firefam #126 #adhd #autism #dyslexa

[void-galaxy-shenanigans]

This is the second time our temp therapist cancelled on us.

For reference, the therapist we've been seeing was an intern who just graduated. December they did grad stuff & then had to reapply & do onboarding again. That means we had to see another intern in the meantime. We'll just use initials for privacy so let's call normal therapist K and temp therapist C.

C (she/her) is amazing at helping with depression, when she shows up. She has a lot of training on how depression is actually a trauma disorder and blew our mind when she changed our perspective on why depression does what it does. It's something one of our littles brought up in less sophisticated words. That's something for another post.

K (¿they/she? we're pretty sure & gonna ask when we get the chance) is amazing at helping us process trauma, and is extremely knowledgeable about ADHD and autism. They've been amazing at helping us realize when our disabilities are disabling us. They've also been very open to learning about D.I.D. to help us with it.

C was arranged to check in every week since mid December while K is unable to. The first check in was a phone call— totally fine, & they called us out 10mins in (“you laugh when you're uncomfortable or stressed. it's laugh or cry, ¿right?”). So we arranged an in person appointment (because the house we're in isn't safe so we prefer in person) & went to that one & it went well.

But the past 2 weeks C has called out sick, and we had to call and reschedule, but they're only available Wednesday & Thursday so we keep having to reschedule for Wed.

The problem with that is, we really really need therapy. Depression is at its worst in a while, and C-PTSD is back with a vengeance, and we're having relationship communication needs that we wanna run past a therapist, and...we just really need the fuckin appointments.

To be clear, I'm not angry at C for being sick. I'm upset because our therapy office *has other therapists*. They could assign someone else so we can get the help, and instead they called at 8am like ‘C is out of the office, call her office to reschedule’.

I decided to instead ask if K is back in the office & available. They were supposed to be available by early January. The front desk said they didn't know & sent me to the scheduling department, who didn't pick up. I left message to call me back.

Worst case scenario I have an appointment today to get medication (for ADHD & depression, hopefully) so I'll be physically in the office by 11am & can ask them then if K is back. But also. What the heck. :/

I was actually more worried it was the meds appointment being cancelled, which I had to schedule 2.5 months out. Therapy can be scheduled for the next week. But with the worry of not getting meds gone I'm still frustrated at the office for not being more considerate or helpful when I asked for other options.

I didn't get therapy just because; I really badly need it & not having an appointment every week is making me lose my mind. I have so much to unpack. It's not even that my routine is disrupted anymore. I just need someone professional to talk to before I explode, which was the point I got to before they assigned C (because 2 weeks without therapy does this to us; I'm overflowing and super not okay).

This is mostly just to get the swirling thoughts out of my system. I need to put it somewhere.

~Nico (he/they)

#vent #personal #~nico #trauma #therapy

[disabledautisticgreen]

i don't know my support needs and it's hard to tell which of it is autism and which is from my other issues. i get scareed because i don't think i can live on my own without help. i don't think i can get a job but my family keeps pushing me to try. i tried to learn how to drive but it just doesn't click for me. the iadl stuff is all stuff i need help with. but a couple badls are issues for me too.

i don't remember who diagnosed me with autism so i don't know what level i am. i feel more autistic than my partner and he sometimes get upset when i do things that are more autistic than him. i don't know how to figure it out. everyone says i should be able to do this or that and when i say i need my hand held i get corrected and told i just need a little help and encouragement. but i know i'm not level 3. is level 1.5 a thing?

my aunt is trying to help me get on disability but i need to call doctors to do that and while i can it's really really hard because i don't understand what people are saying on the phone and i can't ask them to repeat themselves because i get stressed and just say "okay" because that's the only response my brain can give sometimes

i don't know how to end this. i know low support and level 1 can and do have issues. but i don't know if i fall under that. it doesn't feel like i do, i feel like i can't relate to my friends' issues and like i get judged for being different from them, i don't know if i'm faking or pretending having it worse off than them or if my mom medically neglecting me included the autism. i don't want to take from people worse off than me

i also am starting to wonder if i'm semi verbal because i've seen people say things that seemsimilar to how i experience stuff. feeling like jaw is clamped shut. wrong words coming out. stuttering and tripping over my words. i make grunts and growls when upset and it scares people. i think in concepts and it's hard to put words to the concepts. i forget words a lot and pause mid sentence. and talking is hard, not thoughtless. i can use text. but i have to sit for a long while to make words and have them make sense. sometimes i'm okay at words and sometimes i'm not. like right now

but i don't want to take words that don't belong to me or labels that don't apply. so i'm confused and i don't really know what to do or ask besides please help (advice?) and i know people here probably aren't professionals. but i don't know where to start. this has been making me really anxious all the time. thinking about it makes me want to cry if i think about it for too long. please let me know if i'm being hurtful by asking for help. do i just stop worrying about it ebcause i'm probably just low support level 1 with speech loss episodes?or is it fair to suspect that i'm not... i don't know. does low-mid support exist does level 1.5 or 1.7 autism exist??

#autism #actuallyautistic #actually autistic #autism questions #support needs #please help #vent post #autism level #long post