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lisired · 3 months

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who needs cupid’s bow?

pairing: bff!haechan x (f) reader

genre/warnings: bff2l, suggestive, lots of sexual innuedos but no smut, fluff, a teaspoon of angst, mc & hc are oblivious to each other’s feelings and jaemin calls them out on their bullshit, mutual pining

summary: Cupid is not on your side, it seems. He’s made you fall in love with the worst possible person ever, AKA your best friend, AKA the man who still eats tootsie-pops—willingly. And frankly, it feels like the damn candy has a better chance of dating him than you ever will.

word count: 11.1k

a/n: inspired by down for you by kehlani, boyfriend by ariana grande, and serial lover by kehlani. another oldie but i kinda like it… kinda. as always, feedback is appreciated!

It’s safe to say that Cupid is your mortal enemy (Or immortal—whatever. Nonetheless, you aren’t the biggest fan of him.)

You don’t know why, but for some inexplicable reason, he always makes you fall in love with the wrong people. Such as Lee Taeyong from eighth grade, or your failed relationship with Kim Jisoo from your biology class in high school — a pretty girl, but you were as compatible as Mentos and Coca-Cola. Hell, there was even Jung Sungchan from senior year, who you naturally drifted away from during an exam period. They’re all chapters in your book now, but you’re currently stuck on the one about your best friend, Lee Haechan.

It seems like you’re Cupid’s mortal enemy, too. You and Haechan are always side by side, down one another’s throats, there’s no way his arrow could have hit you and missed Haechan.

Perhaps, it’s a hole you dug yourself in. Via mutual friends, when you were seventeen, you met Lee Haechan — jock, senior, and the most beautiful boy you’ve ever seen. There was an instant connection between you two, all it took was a convo at a party about coincidentally both failing the same math exam, and you quickly became friends and close enough to pour out your heart into little rants whenever there was something personal bothering either of you, and you needed an outlet. You liked him because he understood you. He was patient witth you. You see, you aren’t the best at communicating how you feel, and he never makes you feel bad about it.

You remember breaking up with your then-boyfriend, Jung Sungchan, and while you weren’t heartbroken since you saw it coming and all the love had evaporated by then, you were devastated that you no longer had someone to kiss. That being your main concern made Haechan laugh. He thought it was the most you thing ever.

“Can I kiss you, then?” you asked, a little grin on your face, although you were very serious. It wouldn’t be the end of the world, kissing your best friend. He has pretty lips, and it isn’t like it’ll mean anything, you think. It’s just one kiss.

Haechan scoffed, biting off the last remaining piece of his Tootsie Pop off the stick. You’re kidding, he thinks. Why would you seriously want to kiss him? And after breaking up with your now ex-boyfriend? The wound’s still fresh. “You wouldn’t dare.”

To Haechan’s surprise, you dared.

He tasted like chocolate, exactly like a Tootsie Pop, as expected of him. You didn’t mind, though. You never do. It was fun, you liked the way Haechan held you in his lap and kissed you back with fierceness, and he still kisses you with that same passion, like there’s no tomorrow.

And that’s the problem.

Fast-forward four years later, you’re still best friends with Lee Haechan, only this time you’re in college, and have the fattest, most gigantic crush on him. Somewhere along the way, those lines between love and friendship were blurred. It’s impossible to pinpoint when, but you fell deep and hard for your best friend.

And the worst part? You doubt he’ll ever reciprocate those feelings.

One kiss turned into more than you can count on your fingers and toes.

Should you continue making out with your best friend who doesn’t reciprocate your romantic interest in him? Probably not.

Are you still going to, though? Absolutely.

“Y/n, I’m going to kill you,” Haechan states as he stumps inside the dining room. His hair is tussled since he’s just waken up from a nap, but you like this raw side of him. He looks gorgeous, and despite him basically threatening to murder you you still want to kiss him.

“Romantic,” you deadpan, training your eyes back on your laptop. It takes everything in you not to stare, but if you want to keep your feelings low-key, you need to follow a couple of rules.

“I know you took my Tootsie Pop. Where is it?”

You smirk a little, but it quickly fades into a line. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Okay, so maybe that’s a lie, and you both know it. You aren’t the only other person in the house, but Jungwoo, Haechan’s stepbrother, is asleep and wouldn’t cut his nap time short to do something as stupid as stealing the last of his brother’s favorite candy. That leaves you. As his best friend, you’re the first person to know Haechan turns murderous over those stupid lollipops, and that he’s the last person to know how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie-Pop. In your personal opinion, they’re not even that good. But he’s loved them ever since you’ve known him.

“We’re best friends, y/n. I know when you’re lying,” he remarks, and doesn’t give you the chance to answer before he persists, “where is it?”

There’s only one way out of this.

Run.

Haechan follows almost automatically, and in spite of being barely awake he obviously has the upper hand because he’s always leaned more towards the sport-y side. This doesn’t deter you though, because you have a getaway plan.

In your attempt to somehow outrun a man that used to do track and field, you make a beeline for the backyard door. He’s not going to outrun you in the grass in slippers, you think as you turn to see if he’s caught up on you. You’re in the lead, albeit barely, with your body almost being in arms reach. You try to pick up your speed, and once you reach the door you hurry to turn the knob. Except, there’s one, itty-bitty problem.

The door is fucking locked.

And you already know you won’t have time to open it, so you cave in to defeat, whirling around with your hands up in a surrendering pose. Your plan’s backfired; you’ve been caught.

“Oh, I’ve got you now,” Haechan says cockily. He has you—hook, line, and sinker, and at this point you aren’t even upset. You can’t be upset. His eyes are on you, and his body is close to yours, dangerously so.

“Okay, you win. Happy?” You mumur.

“Not until I get my Tootsie Pop back,” he shakes his head, “now where is it?”

Smiling, you shrug. Of course, you know where the candy is, but he’s either going to have to win or pry the answer out of you.

Then, he steps even closer, and your heart starts pounding in your chest twenty times faster than your feet were against the hardwood. This isn’t your first rodeo, you’ve made out with your best friend countless times, yet the anticipation gives you a rush, like you’ve never done this before. It makes you feel like a teenager in love all over again — seventeen, young and head over heels in love with the man closest to you.

He’s back you into the door, and you can’t keep your eyes off his lips. Beautiful, plush, soft, and your eyes flutter shut as you prepare to feel the same skilled pair against your own, closer, and closer, and closer—

Crunch.

“I fucking knew it!” Haechan yells, jolting your eyes open. You aren’t even given the opportunity to register the situation before his hands are digging into your back pocket, retrieving his fortunately unharmed Tootsie Pop.

It feels like he’s gone before you can even blink, and realizing he’s slipped back into the hall, you begin to follow him into his room. “Hey!” you yell, and he doesn’t say anything, just looking up at you from his gaming chair with that damn candy hanging from his mouth, “why didn’t you kiss me?”

“Why’d you steal my Tootsie Pop?”

Okay, that was stupid, yes, but there was a particular goal in mind which was reached, even if for a short-lived moment.

You frown, “I wanted your attention.”

Haechan shakes his head, laughing. “C’mere.”

Somehow, those words never fail, making you melt and slip into his lap effortlessly every time. You’re like Jell-O to his voice, to his touch, to his whole. You’re a goner, some would say, and a part of you is alright with never coming back if it means you get to feel all the weird, Cupid-y emotions he makes you feel.

At this point, you don’t think you’ll ever stop kissing Haechan. In the time that you’ve been together, you’ve both been in relationships, hence putting the make out sessions on hiatus. They were never really long though, because you’d break up with them and inevitably find your way back to one another in the end.

His fingers guide your chin up, and once more your eyes flutter shut as his lips unite with yours. Haechan kisses in a manner that contrasts with the soft feeling of his lips. He always starts off gentle, but there’s a hunger that overcomes him as he stands up and pushes you against his desk, rough yet graceful and holding you so firmly, like you’re glass, but he wants to break you. And when he shatters you into all those tiny pieces, you don’t care. You want him to glue you back together and do it all over again. He’s intoxicating, he’s an addictive drug, but he tastes like candy, and you can’t stop coming back to him. He feels like home, the place where you belong. The place where you can be one-hundred percent, authentically you, safe and whole, more than the general perception than you. And fuck, does he kiss like the damn devil himself.

You were silly for ever believing it would only be one kiss.

Jungwoo thinks that for people who are trying to keep their not-so relationship-y relationship under wraps, you two are very loud.

Speaking of which, and despite the nature of your relationship, you and Haechan haven’t even discussed your label. You know that you aren’t friends with benefits—you haven’t crossed that line, but to be honest, those lines have been starting to look blurry for a while—but you also aren’t in a relationship. You see other people, you fuck other people, and when other people ask if you’re dating, you both deny it immediately. You’re just best friends, you both say each time like some rehearsed line, even if it breaks your heart to hear him friendzone you.

Karina and Mark even have an ongoing bet about you two. Karina is one-hundred positive there’s something going on, whereas Mark is probably the only person in the world that wants to give you guys the benefit of the doubt.

“For heaven’s sake, I can’t get any type of sleep around here,” Jungwoo rasps, leaning against the doorframe, “I really hope you guys don’t do this shit when Dohwan’s here.”

His judgmental eyes practically bore into your soul, and you thank heaven that you don’t have to worry about keeping this secret from Jungwoo, even if he would probably appreciate it more if you did. He finds you in a rather interesting position, straddling Haechan’s lap as you press kisses into his collarbone.

It’s all Haechan’s fault, really. Three years ago, Jungwoo made the mistake of walking inside Haechan’s bedroom without knocking, accidentally finding you two making out in a very touchy way on his bed because a certain someone didn’t think to lock the door. Not only did you ruin his quote-unquote innocence, but his perception of you forever, and ever since that ordeal, Jungwoo has never opened his stepbrother’s door without knocking. This time, it just so happened to be wide-open.

You bite your lip, feeling bad. Kim Dohwan is Haechan’s halfbrother of whom he babysits whenever available (and you like to tag on, because dealing with children is stressful and Haechan’s already stressed enough), and on weekdays Jungwoo has to wake up from his nap earlier to pick up the kid from school and bring him back home, then leave for work. You were too loud and disrupted the poor guy’s nap time.

“Oh,” Haechan says the syllable blankly, not too sympathetic, “did we wake you?”

“Of course not, I usually wake up at 2pm and take extra longs showers to start my day,” Jungwoo deadpans, “but whatever. I’m heading out. Don’t forget to go grocery shopping today.”

��Noted,” you and Haechan say simultaneously, gazing at one another and stifling giggles when you catch each other’s gaze. Jungwoo smiles at you, then flicks off his brother before parting.

When you’re both all alone again, a few seconds pass before Haechan’s eyes do that thing where they twinkle every time something catches his interest (or perhaps that’s the in love side of your brain making you see things.)

“Hey, you coming to Chenle’s Valentines Day party Monday?” You don’t know why he’s even asking, you follow Haechan everywhere he goes like a lost puppy. Maybe he’s discreetly asking you out. “Unless you’re actually busy, by the way, I hope you know you’re going. And maybe you’ll find some single pringle interested in a relationship. You can’t just kiss me forever, you know.” Oh. Well that eliminates that thought.

A part of you is yelling at you to decline, to lie and say that you actually have a dick or pussy appointment scheduled for the 14th, yet another is weak, in spite of you being aware of how this works. First of all, Valentine’s Day parties are mainly for single people who don’t have anything better to do, and each time one of you go to one, you end up meeting some stranger and hooking up with them. You know that’s more than likely what he’s going to do, and you aren’t strong enough to watch him flirt with other people.

You know how to put up a good front, though, so you’ll fake it until you make it.

“We can do a lot more than kiss,” you suggest with a wink.

Haechan grimaces, “No thanks. Now get off my lap.”

You frown, but climb off his lap nonetheless. “Wow,” you drag dramatically, “You’ll make out with me for what feels like hours, but sticking your dick in me is where you draw the line?”

“Precisely.”

You gasp in faux offense. “Oh, come on. Sex doesn’t seem so bad. Like, think of it as my pussy giving your dick a nice warm hug.”

Haechan’s at a lost for words, his face bright red. How do you even come up with this stuff? “Oh my god, are you coming or not?”

You joke, “I thought you said sticking your dick in me was where you draw the line?”

He shoots you a glare so sharp you’re sure that if you were still on his lap, he’d be barely resisting the urge to shove you off. You don’t miss the way his cheeks heat up, though.

Haechan groans exasperatedly, leaning back his gaming chair, “Y/n, seriously!”

“Fine!” resisting your best friend is literally impossible, you conclude, because you have officially caved in to his request—or, more or less, demand, rather, “fine, fine! I’ll go!”

“Great,” he grins with satisfaction, beaming with his thirty-two teeth, and you even see little gleams of smiles in his eyes, “anyway, Dohwan’s gonna be here soon, so let’s get ready to go shopping.”

You furrow your brows. You have a solid twenty minutes left, and all you really need to do is slip on your shoes.

“I need more Tootsie Pops,” Haechan adds, and suddenly everything makes a lot more sense.

And you roll your eyes. “We’ll get you some more Tootsie Pops, but you better not ditch us for the candy aisle!”

“Of course, not,” he smiles, not even trying to sound or appear convincing. “I’d never leave you guys.”

That’s exactly what he does.

You aren’t even remotely surprised, though heavily disappointed when he announces in the middle of the thankfully empty cereal aisle that he’s going to find Tootsie Pops, managing to run off before you can even protest.

Gripping the shopping cart, you avert your gaze from the Cinnamon Toast Cruch boxes to his figure, almost missing him jog onto the following aisle. You shake your head, a small smile tugging your lips. If it were the end of the world, Haechan would stock up on those candies before he would even think to consider water.

“Auntie Y/N,” you aren’t quite adjusted to being addressed as an aunt, but you aren’t against it either. You have the image all put together—rich, thriving, and the kids adore you, “do you love my brother?”

That was perhaps the very last question you expected the six-year-old boy to ask you. Your eyes are a little wide, but it’s a kid, you remind yourself, so you shouldn’t be worried. But shit, then again, if a first-grader can figure it out, you’re fresh out of luck.

“Why do you think that?” You crouch down to be eye-level with him, having a feeling there’s some misunderstanding here. Dohwan’s bright for his age and doesn’t let anyone forget it, but you’ll be damned if he’s sniffed you out.

He makes a face. “I saw you kiss him, just like mommy and daddy do. And my mommy and daddy love each other very—” he stretches the vowel, and you can’t but giggle, “—much! That’s why they made me!” then he gasps, and you fear what it means, praying he doesn’t ask what you think he will. “Will you and my brother have a baby, too? I wan’ a new friend!”

On second thought, you think you’d rather he would’ve asked you what you thought he was. You nearly have a heart attack in the middle of the aisle, yet still, Dohwan gazes up at you with his innocent, sparkly eyes. You assume it’s in the blood; Jungwoo doesn’t have them, and he isn’t blood-related to Haechan, but Dohwan partially is, and the twinkle is promiment.

Calmly, you reply, “Don’t you already have a lot friends?”

He does, you both know it. You vaguely remember pulling up to his sixth birthday bash and being in shock of all the little kids jumping and flipping on the Spider-Man bouncy house. You haven’t been surrounded by that many children since, hell, probably since kindergarten.

“Yeah, but I wanna be a big brother,” he folds his tiny arms and pouts, “It’s not fair Hyuck and Woo get to be big, but I don’t!”

With minimum success, you manage to stifle your laugh, stretching out your arms to bring the little boy in for a hug, “You’ll be big one day. Trust me, you don’t wanna rush it.”

“And strong like Superman?”

“And strong like Superman,” you reassure, all smiley and convincing. “Now let’s go check up on your big brother, he’s taking too long.”

Dohwan rocks from side to side as he walks, murmuring some Nickelodeon TV show theme song, and you push the cart until you’ve reached your designation.

Quickly, you regret acting on your impatience. The scene taking place at the back of the aisle is anything but comforting—Haechan’s talking to some girl, whom of which is literally throwing herself onto him, and you can’t help but notice the way he wallows in the attention. For fucks sake, all the attention you give him and he doesn’t even give a fraction of it back! Then here comes this random girl from your campus.

Sometimes, you think about how you could do everything she’s doing right now—twirl your hair around your finger, be touchy with him, giggling girlishly at everything he says, funny or not—and yet he wouldn’t bat an eye, because you’re best friends and nothing more. Kissing each other breathless is already normalized between the two of you, what’s a little flirting.

Sometimes, you wish you hadn’t kissed your best friend that day. You’re both too comfortable, everything is too weightless. I love you, Haechan says it back without a thought. C’mere, he calls and pulls you onto his lap or cuddles you to death. Fuck, he—on very rare occasions when making out goes a little too far—groans into your ear, groping you a little. Scratch that. It may be weightless on his end, but it isn’t on yours, and everything has an everlasting effect on you.

“Auntie?”

When you look down at Dohwan, your gaze is so, so tired. Your eyes do the talking; you can’t move your lips.

He hugs your leg. “I love you.”

His face is pure, innocent, but he reads you so perfectly. The corners of your lips turn up, and you ruffle his hair, “Love ya, too. Let’s go get your brother, alright?”

He bounces eagerly, and you both begin to stroll down the aisle until you’re beside Haechan. You’re in a selfish mood today, so you think of some remark to make in the process.

“Nice Tootsie Pops, Bowlcut,” you mask your tiny emotional breakdown with a joke, “Hi, Faith.”

“Hope,” she corrects, evidently annoyed by your presence, though she doesn’t state it outright. “My name is Hope. And… bowl cut?”

“Interchangeable,” you dismiss her correction carelessly. In all honesty, you already knew her name, but you’re feeling like a bitter bitch currently, “and yeah, in high school Haechan had this hideous bowl cut that he—”

“Shut the fuck up,” Haechan grumbles, “that was four years ago!”

“And I’ll never forget,” you’re smiling blissfully, nostalgic. “Anyways, what’cha two doing?”

“We were catching up, it’s been a minute since I’ve seen Hope here,” you hear Hope snicker at this, and something about it is extremely off-putting. He turns to her, “So, I’m in a bit of a time crunch. Could I have your number?”

Ouch. Right in your face, literally.

She giggles some more, typing her number in his phone, and you try to focus on Dohwan so that you don’t cave into your desire to knock her upside the head. There’s already so much on your plate, you don’t need an assault charge.

She smiles, all bubbly and giddy. You know jealousy isn’t a good look, but it’s still pissing you off. “See you around?”

“See you around,” Haechan replies. She hugs him, not forgetting to shoot you a look from across his shoulder as she does, and only once satisfied does she turns on her heel, sashaying away.

“Didn’t know pussy was on the shopping list,” you sneer, relieved once she’s finally gone. Her presence was suffocating.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” he rolls his eyes, “at least I’m actually trying, I don’t know what you’re going to do when I’m cuffed down and—holy sh—I mean crap! You’re so quiet, I forgot you were here,” Haechan jumps, only noticing Dohwan when he pokes at his leg. “And don’t you dare make a cuff joke, y/n. Not in front of the kid.”

You yell in that defensive tone which is a tell-tale sign you’re lying, “I wasn’t gonna!”

Haechan gives you the look.

The we’re-best-friends, I-know-when-you’re-lying look.

And that look is utterly withering, so you decide you’re accepting defeat. “Okay fine, maybe I was thinking about it, but I wasn’t actually gonna say it. Not with him around.”

Haechan snorts, like you said something funny, but in reality he just doesn’t believe you. “Yeah, alright. Let’s finish shopping.”

You don’t argue, but there’s a lingering thought in your mind as you push the cart, rattling around in your brain still.

When he’s cuffed. Hmm. You can’t speak for him completely, but you both know how that one goes. When you get into a relationship, you think the person is great and they serve as a nice temporary distraction—that is, until you’re bored and realize no one will ever compare to Haechan, and especially not in the kissing department. So you break up, and then you go back to making out with Haechan, solidifying your suspicion that no one will ever replace your best friend. It’s the reason you don’t do relationships anymore, you feel bad for using people when you know it isn’t going to change a thing. It never does.

As far as your knowledge extends, things aren’t too different with Haechan. You and him don’t push things, you don’t pry too deep. There’s some unspoken boundary, and you know when to drop things. That’s why you both say the same thing each time you ask one another why you and whoever it was that you were previously seeing broke up—it wasn’t working out.

Like a moth to a flame, Haechan always finds his way back to you too, because apparently you’re the only person that can keep him tied down. You don’t think that’s the case, though. Your problem is you’re in love with your best friend, no matter how hard you try to suppress the feelings. His problem? You can’t be sure, but you’d guess commitment issues.

Whatever it is, and as selfish as it may sound, you want it to stay. He isn’t yours, but you like the comfort of knowing that he isn’t anyone else’s, either.

If Cupid had a human counterpart, it would be Na Jaemin in reincarnated form. He may not have wings nor a bow and arrow, but he does have dedication and a gigantic mouth.

“I can’t believe you called me over here for this,” you stand in an effort to leave, but Jaemin pulls you back down by your wrist, so you sigh, accepting that you’re stuck in the cafe and in the middle of a Jaem-terrogation.

“Not so fast, Sonic. You still haven’t answered my question. I don’t have all day, you know, I have other people’s business to be in,” he admits unabashedly, and you snort at his honesty.

Jaemin is an extremely shameless, extremely straightforward individual. He knows what he wants, how to get it, and the only time he’s afraid of letting someone know what he’s chasing for is when it interferes with his goal of obtaining said desire. He loves all things drama and gossip, and these are the lengths he’ll go to squeeze information out of you. No wonder he’s one of the writers for the campus newspaper.

“I don’t have feelings for Haechan,” you fiddle with your fork. “And even if I did, why would it matter? Haechan doesn’t have feelings for me, either.”

“Forgive me, but you’re a fucking dumbass,” Jaemin concludes, and you gasp in dramatic offense. “Why would I be here if he didn’t like you back, y/n? You know that he hasn’t had anyone over in two weeks? There’s like, three things at the top of Haechan’s list of shit he needs to survive, and that’s you, Tootsie Pops, and sex. Yet he’s gone two entire weeks without it. He likes you, really fucking bad.”

“Golly gee, Haechan hasn’t fucked anyone in two entire weeks. He must be head over heels in love with me,” you deadpan, ignoring how Jaemin rolls his eyes in response. “Be serious, Jaem. He literally got this girl’s number the other day. The man said himself that he doesn’t want to stick his dick in me. There’s nothing going on.”

Okay, so maybe Haechan is a raging sexaholic. Maybe he’s been a little horny recently. And maybe contact-full makeout sessions have been a reoccurrence in the past two weeks, but none of that matters, and he typically has extreme self control. Fresh as yesterday, he was definitely trying to get into Hope’s pants. It’s weightless, everything between you. It means absolutely nothing, and you’re trying to come to terms with the possibility that it never will. You wish your friends would accept the fact, too.

At least they don’t know you and Haechan make out, and have been for the past four years. They’d be insufferable, and you two would absolutely never hear the end of it.

“Y/n, please. Your biggest competition is those damn Tootsie Pops.”

“And if you told him that he had to live without me or the candy, he’d choose them over me any day.”

“Actually, he’d tell me to fuck off—and stop asking him stupid questions. You can’t tell me I’m wrong because I’m speaking from experience,” Jaemin grins, “I pushed the question until he gave me a proper answer. He chose you, by the way.”

You groan into your hands, “Unless you have some other evidence to provide besides this stupid question and him not getting laid in two weeks, you’re wasting my time here, Cupid.”

Jaemin sighs, “I thought I could pressure you into admitting your feelings—”

“I don’t have feelings for Haechan!”

“—that you deny having, but I guess taking the high road doesn’t work. Don’t worry, I still have plan B. I mean, you should be worried, but it’s whatever.”

You blink. “Plan B?”

He ignores you, standing up and preparing to take his leave. You’re still curious about whatever his alternative, backup plan is however, and he doesn’t look like he’s going to tell you.

“Jaemin!” You shriek. “What are you talking about?”

“February 14th, Chenle’s party,” he answers vaguely, swinging his bag over his shoulders. “Be there, or be square. Whatever that means.”

He exits without another word, leaving you dumbfounded and with a sudden dread in your chest. They don’t… know, do they? No, of course not. How could they? You’ve been keeping this secret for nearly four years, and the only people that know are Jungwoo and Dohwan.

Great. Another reason to dread the fourteenth, and despise Cupid—and his human counterpart, your actual mortal enemy.

“I know you like Regina George, but the dress code is Cady Heron.”

Bummer. You didn’t exactly plan on attending as a sexy bunny in fishnets and knee-high boots, but you don’t intend on wearing a Party City outfit, neither. It’s only the 6th though, so you still have a week and some change to outfit plan.

You frown, “Why the change? None of his past parties have had much of a dress code.”

“Because Chenle is also stuck babysitting his baby brother on Valentine’s day while his parents are having a date night,” Haechan answers. “I’m not saying you have to dress like a prude, but don’t dress like a slut, either.”

Ignoring the insinuation behind his words, you don’t miss the fact he said also. “What do you mean also? Don’t tell me…”

“Exactly what you think. Dad is whisking my stepmom away on a romantic evening date to only God knows where, and Jungwoo is busy with his girlfriend, so me being the sole single-pringle in the family gave him the bright idea to have me baby sit,” he explains, though he doesn’t seem burdened by the task. “I don’t really mind, though. It’d be one thing if I planned on getting some pussy that night, but no one’s smashing at a party where there’s children. I hope not, at least.”

You wince at that. You hope not, too. It’s a setback that you have to re-plan your outfit, but on the plus side, Haechan can and will help you decide this time, even if you have to force him.

So that’s where you find yourself a couple hours later, your bedroom a mess as the aftermath of the meticulous care you’ve put into your self-styling. You’ve narrowed it down to two outfit selections; option A, the white crop-top with the cute pink pants; or option B, the pretty and red mini-dress with stilettos. It’s a little embarrassing that hours of your indecisiveness have led you to this conclusion, but you want to choose the perfect outfit that’s also not overbearing.

“And I have to help you why?”

“Because you’re my best friend, and that’s what best friends are for, duh.”

Haechan’s favorite thing about your place is you have all his utmost favorite games—and that literally everything there is like a piece of you, from the decoration to the smell of your perfume bottles you keep in your bathroom. He’d never tell you that, though—so he wasn’t too enthusiastic about being interrupted from his video-gaming session. But then, he realized he gets a special preview of your Valentine’s day outfit, and Haechan loves the way you dress, probably an abnormal amount. Slutty or prude-y.

“Then what’cha waiting for? Strip for me, princess,” he demands jokingly. It isn’t normal for you to feel bashful by anything a guy says, but everything is so different with Haechan. It’s the littlest, simplist things that drive you over the edge, that make you want him in ways you probably, scratch that, definitely shouldn’t.

And all the questions, assumptions, and rumors regarding your nonexistent relationship with Haechan aren’t exactly unwarranted. You two flirt and touch an abnormal amount, and while it’s common knowledge that Haechan is a touchy person, and you’re a natural flirt, people say it’s extreme between you two.

That makes you laugh. When it comes to the tension between you both that people speak of, you wish you could see what they see.

“You want to watch me strip?” You’re genuinely surprised, only the other day he seemed repulsed by the thought of you naked. “That’s new. I’m guessing you haven’t gotten laid in a hot minute.”

Haechan rolls his eyes, silently confirming what Jaemin told you at the cafe, but you shake the thought away, refusing to let it spur you on. It doesn’t mean anything. “Anyways. You’ve got nothing I haven’t seen before, baby girl. Now, you gonna strip or what?”

“I’m stripping, I’m stripping! Relax, Liam Payne!” It’s really nothing he hasn’t seen before, because Haechan’s seen naked girls, and he’s seen you half-naked before, so neither of you actually care. You peel off your top, slowly and in a strip tease sort of way and look him in the eye, giggling once you catch him shaking his head. You don’t repeat the movement with your shorts though, simply taking them off and picking up your new shirt to slip it off the hanger.

Successfully discreet, Haechan wallows in the sight of you half-naked for as long as he can before you’re slipping on the crop top and the pink pants. Now that he thinks about it, he bought you those pants, and darn do they make your ass look good. Then he realizes he’s thinking about your ass and taking not as discreet looks at it, and shakes the thought away.

“So?” Your voice cuts through the silence. “What do you think?”

He needs a moment to gather himself and recollect his thoughts, because he feels like turning on Destiny’s Child’s Bootylicious and if spoke his mind he would definitely say something he’d regret. Like, I could fuck the shit out of you. He doesn’t think he should say that.

“What do you mean, what do I think? I bought you those pants, I’d be damned if I thought you didn’t look good in them,” Haechan supplies, making you roll your eyes in response.

“Very underwhelming reaction. I wanted you to fall out on the floor and pass out for a few seconds with your hand on your chest,” you pout.

“Definitely not doing all that,” he chuckles. “But you do look good enough for… somebody to do it. Anyways, it’s stripping time again. Get in that dress for me, princess.”

If he doesn’t stop with the pet names you’re going to combust. You hide it though, taking off outfit option A and putting on option B. You feel confident in your appearance, with or without him, but the way Haechan’s practically gawking at you does boost said confidence.

“What about this one?”

Okay, so Haechan’s one-hundred percent biased in his decision—or maybe he isn’t, since he didn’t buy this outfit—though nonetheless, he loves this dress on you. In his personal opinion, you’ll look good in anything you wear, but the way this particular dress hugs your figure perfectly is a bonus. He knows all eyes are going to be on you the moment you step inside Chenle’s house, and maybe he’s going to have to keep you and Dohwan close to his side.

Rather than replying verbally, Haechan walks forward and pulls you into a kiss. His hands dip around your waist, skirting the area until he’s gripping you like he’s afraid of letting go.

And as always, you melt into his lips. Like ice to the sun, or wax to a flame. It’s the umpteenth kiss in your whole lifetime, but Haechan always makes it feel like the first time. Like two love-struck highschoolers, except with a lot more experience. Haechan kisses you like he loves you, and you hate it. You might even loathe it.

His fingers slip down your hips, to your revealed thighs, like he just so happens to know that’s one of your weak spots. Luckily you’ve learned some of his weak spots too, and not really thinking, you don’t hesitate to aim for his most sensitive one - his neck. You can’t get used to how beautiful he sounds as he moans, your lips pressing into his sweet spot and leaving undoubtedly a mark.

“Fuck,” Haechan moans, “you’re my kryptonite, you know that?”

“A kiss is all it takes for you to fold?” You gasp out with a smirk.

“Shut up.”

Your grin widens. “Make me.”

Just as he leans in, about to pin you down to your duvet and kiss the life out of you while you’re thinking that maybe this is the tension people speak of, his phone rings in his back pocket. It feels like snapping out some trance or spell, like a reverse Cupid’s arrow, and he instantly backs off of you.

He takes a look at his phone screen. “I um, I gotta take this.”

Biting your lip, you nod. “Okay.”

“You look great though,” he comments, and you smile thinly at him as he slips from between your fingertips yet again.

It seems that you’re left all alone, pathetically wet, and wondering if that person on the other line is Hope - but you try to shake that thought off.

Sighing, you flop against your sheets. Love is some extremely cruel, extremely rigged game that only lucky people win, and it seems that Luck has sided with the evil that is Cupid. You’ve been dealt cards, and Haechan refuses to show you his hand. All you can do is watch it play out.

Haechan knew that something was dangerously off when Jaemin bought him a brand-new bag of Tootsie Pops without being asked, and invited you over for a movie night with the guys, offering to open up with you and Haechan’s all-time favorite movie, Mean Girls. He even offered to play The Kissing Booth next! Everyone else instantly protested of course, but the fact he offered in the first place is borderline suspicious.

Sure, Jaemin’s not the devil or anything, depending on who you ask. He’s… kind, and he can be a sweetheart. But Jaemin does nothing for free, and Haechan can’t shake the thought that this is planned bribery. And it isn’t hush-money. Jaemin doesn’t buy silence, he buys words.

By the time Jaemin asks Haechan to help him with the popcorn, he’s ninety-nine point nine percent sure that something is definitely wrong here. Yet still, he follows him into the kitchen.

“Alright, what’s up man?” Haechan wastes zero time, wanting to get to the bottom of all this. “I know you want something out of me. There’s no other reason you would offer to play The Kissing Booth, or buy me Tootsie Pops for free.”

Jaemin scoffs, but he doesn’t try to front, “Glad you know. Since we’re on the same page, let’s address this thing with you and y/n.”

“That’s what this is about?” Haechan grumbles. “I’ve told you, I don’t have feelings for her!” He whisper-yells.

Jaemin has heard that far too many times for it to be convincing. He’s positive that even Helen Keller herself could tell you two are hopelessly in love. Takes one to know one, he thinks. It seems the three of you must be blind, because you and Haechan are oblivious to your feelings for one another, and it’s painfully obvious.

“And Mary wasn’t a virgin,” Jaemin says ironically, making Haechan roll his eyes. “If you’re not in love with her, then explain what the hell is going on between you two. I know that she’s your best friend or whatever, but you don’t act like it at all. From a fresh perspective, someone would totally think you’re in love.”

Haechan hates that he’s right. It doesn’t make sense the amount of times you’ve gone to public places and had cashiers refer to you as a couple, or elderly people ask you if you’re together. Because you’re not. You’re best friends, and even if Haechan wants to be more than that, that’s his label. And he’s sure he’s stuck with it for life.

“You’re fucking Hope to distract yourself from your feelings for y/n,” Jaemin adds, and it’s a statement, not a question.

“I’m not—”

“You are,” Jaemin interjects. “Head over heels, in love with a girl you think doesn’t reciprocate your feelings, and you’re also being an ass to her, whether you know it or not.”

If Haechan was in a situation where he needed to simplify the reason you two click so well, he’d say chalk it up to compatibility and say it’s because you’re like a mirror of one another. Which also means he knows you, better than anyone else even, and he knows neither of you do the whole catching feelings things anymore. You like to fuck and flirt, and fuck some more, to avoid the fact that you love too hard. If you fuck people whose names you don’t even remember, it doesn’t mean a darn thing that you two make out.

No one really knows about that part yet. But they do know that you like to fuck, and that’s why Haechan thinks that if he’s an ass, then that means so are you. What the fuck is he doing that you aren’t?

Even if he is an ass, what is he supposed to do? He’s only recently realized that damn, he actually does have feelings for you, which is where Hope comes along and yes, he is fucking her to distract himself from you. So what? It’s not like it’s working, he’s still stuck on you, obsessed with the thought of you, craving your touch and the sound of your voice. He still loves you, and it’s so scary because no matter what his friends say, he thinks they don’t know you or your relationship like he does. They think they do, but they don’t.

“I’m not in love,” Haechan lies through his teeth, “maybe I’m in like.”

Jaemin snorts. In like? That’s the stupidest thing he’s ever heard. Not in love his fucking ass. “You’re in denial, that’s what you are.”

Haechan grumbles, trying desperately not to raise his voice so that the others don’t hear him from the living room, “Even if I did like her—and I’m telling you, I don’t—it wouldn’t change anything because she doesn’t like me.”

“You two are the same breed of oblivious and stupid,” Jaemin takes the popcorn out of the microwave, pouring it all into a bowl. He’s even laughing, much to Haechan’s confusion, but he’s apparently unbothered by Haechan’s lack of confession, “but fine. Lie to my face. I still have a backup plan.”

“A back-up plan?” Haechan repeats, lost.

“I just thought it would be nice of me to try and get you to confess before I have to work a Valentine’s day miracle, but unfortunately you two are a match made in heaven—both terribly stubborn,” Jaemin says vaguely, not really answering Haechan’s question, “so I guess we’ll all know the truth at Chenle’s party.”

Jaemin exits with the popcorn bowls before Haechan can even part his lips to ask another question, and he stands there, shocked and unsure of how to react. He’s concerned, though. Jaemin has something cooking (besides the popcorn), and he isn’t sure what, but it’s Na fucking gossiping blabbermouth Jaemin. That means it can’t be anything good.

So apparently when you and Haechan had that heated makeout session the other day, you left a trail - or in other words, you marked his neck the fuck up.

You hadn’t noticed because he covered it up with concealer, but you’re in the middle of another one of those when he stops you, preventing you from repeating your mistake.

“You can’t do that. People will see,” Haechan frowns. You wonder what’s the problem with hickeys. Is he embarrassed? No way. Haechan? Embarrassed? About hickeys? He has much bigger fish to fry.

In contrast, you’re over the moon. Even if he isn’t yours, marking him up makes you feel like he belongs to you. Plus, other people will see, and they’ll know that he isn’t theirs, either. Haechan also has a beautiful neck, you realize as you stare at his skin. It makes you wonder if there’s anything about him that isn’t beautiful.

“Would that be so bad?” You ask. “You’d look sexy all marked up by me.”

Haechan groans, “Do you ever think with your head and not your pussy?”

“I wish my pussy was my head. My head’s just so full of you,” you sigh dramatically.

It’s rare for Haechan to blush, but you somehow manage to make him full-on flush sometimes and you take that as an achievement. It’s partially the reason you love flirting with him so much, he’s so reactive. His reactions are cute sometimes.

“Be serious for 5 seconds,” he whines, and you giggle.

“I was serious,” you insist, “but fine, I’ll think with my head since yours is clearly not working. No one’s gonna assume they’re from me, Hyuck. Just tell them they’re from one of your hoes.”

“I know, but it’s not them I’m worried about. It’s, um…” he trails off.

You’re confused, blinking. If not your friends, then who on earth—oh, for fucks sake.

“It’s Hope,” you utter tonelessly.

“Yeah, uh, yeah,” he wonders why you suddenly sound so dry, and then the whole grocery shopping thing seeps back into his mind. You obviously don’t like Hope, and it’s not just you, really. Lots of people don’t like her. But Haechan needs a pretty face to compete with the image of yours in his head, even if it isn’t winning. “She kinda likes me, and—”

“Do you like her?” You don’t mean to ask so fast. It slips, like your mouth has a mind of its own.

Haechan shrugs. No, he doesn’t like her. He likes you, but he thinks that maybe he can somehow convince himself it’s the other way around. So he replies, “Maybe.”

Fuck. You try not to appear suddenly devoid of life, forcing a cheery smile. “That’s… nice,” you lie through your teeth. “Let me take this opportunity to have one last kiss before I possibly never will again?”

Haechan snickers, to silently say as if. He isn’t wrong for it, either. One kiss is never one kiss with him — never has been, never will be. There’s a reason you both bonded over bombing a math exam.

D-day rolls around, and you’re eyeing your frame in your full-length mirror, smoothing your palms over your dress as you give yourself a quick once-over before the clock strikes 7PM. You look like that bitch, and everyone in that party is going to fucking know it because you’re going to walk in there like that bitch. Fuck Cupid. You don’t need his stupid bow. And fuck Haechan, too. He’s your ride, but he’s gonna ditch you at some point in the party like he always does. It’ll be no different now, and this time, you’ll be the first one to leave.

The chime of the doorbell jolts you from your mental slumber, and you quickly reach for your purse then head towards the door with a heavy heartbeat. You know he’s already seen you in this dress, he chose it for fucks sake, but there’s something else that gets your heart racing—no. You can’t think about him. Fuck Haechan, remember? He’s no good for you.

“Here goes nothing,” you mutter to yourself, palm on the doorknob, “you can do this.”

Haechan’s sucks in a breath the moment you open the door. You look gorgeous. You always do, but in this particular moment, you look better than you ever have before. Those corny romance sayings usually make him laugh with mirth, but he’s genuinely convinced you look better everyday that he sees you. All dressed up like this, or not.

“You look so pretty, Auntie!” Dohwan beats him to a compliment.

You bend down to ruffle the boy’s hair, “Thank you, Dohwan. You look very handsome.” And then you look at Haechan.

He looks handsome as well, unfortunately. Jet black hair, exposed forehead, and his outfit is black with red hearts in the center of the shirt. You try not to pay him too much mind, but your heart and the place between your thighs don’t seem to agree with your mind. He catches you looking at him, and feels a twinge of anxiousness in his heart. Get it together, man, he tells himself. Lee Donghyuck doesn’t get nervous looking at pretty girls. Lee Donghyuck doesn’t hesitate about his actions, either, wondering if he should hold your hand, he doesn’t rethink what he should say. It all comes to him naturally.

“Yeah, you look beautiful,” he settles, mentally cursing himself for being unable to think of anything else. He blames you. Ever since you first snuck in his mind, you’ve been living rent-free there, and make it hard to think about anything else sometimes. That’s why he thought that needed distractions.

If you could relay the message to your heart, you’d tell it stop beating. Instead, you mask your emotion, smiling. “Thank you, likewise. Now c’mon, we gotta get there by 7:30!”

Haechan’s saddened by the dismissal, but you don’t catch his face as you walk to his car.

If you ignore him, you can do this.

Haechan cannot do this.

Something isn’t right. It wasn’t right the second he noticed you gave him a simple, rushed compliment, not bothering to make some sexual remark that usually makes Haechan’s cheeks feel like fire. You didn’t even kiss him before you got in the car. And Haechan’s sure you’ve been avoiding him like the plague, scurrying off and getting lost in the red and pink sea before he could even ask you if you wanted to check out the drink menu.

He doesn’t know where you are, and that haunts him. Turns out Chenle is paying Yangyang, Ten and Jisung to keep the kids entertained on one end of the house, whilst the adults do adult-y things on the other. You could be with someone else for all he knows, hell, you probably are. He was practically fuming when he saw some people staring at you as you walked in.

“Uh oh, I think y/n divorced Haechan,” Chenle jokes, and a choir of laughs follows suit.

Haechan grumbles, “A guy can’t miss his girl best friend?”

“Of course, you can,” Chenle drawls, “but everyone knows she’s more than just a friend to you. Like even if you aren’t together, there’s no way you guys don’t have feelings for each other.”

“Right? And they’re so cute together, too. A literal match made in heaven by angel Cupid,” Jaemin agrees, speaking as though Haechan isn’t right there.

“You’re dating y/n?” gasps Karina, overhearing Jaemin much to Haechan’s dismay. Oh, great, she’s as much as a blabbermouth as he is. The whole world’s going to think Haechan’s dating you in five minutes or less.

“No!”

“Yes, he is, spread the word,” Jaemin says, already knowing he doesn’t have to tell her. Karina’s mumbling I knew it under her breath before jogging somewhere.

“You know,” Haechan starts, downing a shot because if he’s not at least tipsy he’s going to die at this party, “she’s been making me watch murder documentaries with her and I’ve definitely picked up a thing or two. I’d be careful.”

Jaemin scoffs, “Please. You’re going to be kissing my ass and the ground that I walk on by the time this party’s over.”

There it goes. Haechan wonders what’s so special about tonight that Jaemin’s been hinting at vaguely. It’s been keeping him on his toes, but he doesn’t ask because he knows Jaemin, and he isn’t going to tell him a thing. The one time this guy wants to keep something secret.

An hour flies by, and Haechan still hasn’t seen you. He’s looked for you, and refuses to believe his eyes are somehow missing you, even though you’re in a crowd. He literally went up the stars and gazed over the railing for a better view, and you were no where to be found. You’ve refused to answer your phone, too, and Haechan doesn’t know what to do. He would just start talking to some random chick, but that’s not what Haechan wants. He doesn’t want some random chick. He wants to be with you. Hold you. Touch you. Kiss you, with no shame, no fear, in front of everyone, and he isn’t in denial about it. He wants you.

And Jaemin is fed up.

“Alright, I’m tired of you moping around drinking like a divorced man. Let’s go to the kitchen,” Jaemin suggests. Or commands, but still.

Haechan quirks a brow. “Where there’s nothing but more drinks?”

“Trust me, I’m not letting you drink anymore tonight. You have a wife and a kid to drive home,” Jaemin jokes. Usually he’d deny any sort of relationship with you that isn’t best-friendship, but Haechan simply shakes his head, following his friend and roommate into the kitchen.

Then he sees you, and his jaw doesn’t just drop, but it falls flat on the ground, bounces a little, and comes back down. You’re clinging to Chenle’s side with a confused face, equally as surprised to see him, though not very delighted.

“What’s going on?”

You stare at one another.

“Stop copying me!”

Jaemin and Chenle stare at one another, then stare at you two staring at one another, and stare at one another again.

“I hate to interrupt your… stare-off, but there’s a reason we brought you two here,” Jaemin interjects, making you two finally split gazes as you stare at him, confused.

“Which is?”

You glare at him. Jaemin’s success was short-lived, it seems.

“Drum roll, please,” he says, and Chenle begins tapping against the counter, “Dohwan!”

Suddenly, Dohwan pops up from around the corner. He’s on the completely wrong side of the house, and while he’s under adult supervision, you still wonder why he’s here.

You blink. “What’s he doing here?”

Jaemin smirks. “I’m glad you asked. Dohwan tells me he’s witnessing some very interesting sights of the two of you. Go ahead and tell us what you saw, kiddo.”

“I saw Haechan and Auntie y/n kissing, like mommy and daddy do!” Dohwan shares, grimacing in disgust. If you weren’t practically fearing for your life right now, you’d probably laugh at his reaction.

“And how often do you see this?” Chenle adds.

“Um…” the kid ponders, “every time Auntie y/n comes over. I heard them say they wanted to keep it a secret from me, but they’re not very good at it.”

Haechan shoots you a panicked look, and you’re wearing the exact same one. By the time you realize that this is what Jaemin’s been hinting at this whole time, it’s much too late. Your secret has been exposed to the worst people ever, and now they’re definitely going to think you’re dating.

“Thank you for your input, Dohwan,” Jaemin smiles, then turns to look at you and Haechan. You’re both frozen and stiff, unsure of how to respond. “So, anything to say about this?”

“It doesn’t mean anything,” Haechan’s quick to say. You hope no one catches the way your face falters with hurt for a split second. “If you want me to be honest, then fine, I will. Yeah, we kiss. We’ve been kissing since high school, but it didn’t mean anything then and it doesn’t mean anything now. We just, I don’t know, do it for fun.”

Chenle deadpans, “So you just kiss for pure, innocent fun.”

“Exactly,” Haechan nods. “It means nothing.”

It means something to me, you think to yourself, and when you notice the silence in the room, you gaze up to see everyone’s eyes on you, Haechan’s a little wide. Oh, fuck.

“I said that aloud, didn’t I?”

“Yep,” Jaemin grins. He was right. “Is there something you want to share with the class?”

Stupidly, you decide to look at Haechan, and he’s re-lost his composure, frozen up and stiff all over again. Your heart is pounding harder than it has been all night. It’s partially the alcohol, but you can feel it in your veins and all around you. It won’t leave you alone, and looking at Haechan, it’s faster, as if to say he’s the one I want.

So you choose to make another decision that you might possibly regret, but you have to get this off your chest. It isn’t news to anyone but Haechan anyways.

“Donghyuck,” you start, and he knows it’s getting serious because you just said his government name. You literally never call him by his government name. “I know we agreed to keep things platonic, and for it to mean nothing, but I want you. Like really, really bad. I think I—no, everyone’s right, I really am, extremely in love with you. If you don’t feel the same I understand, I just had to get this off my che—”

You aren’t given the chance to finish before Haechan swoops you in his arms, reaching for your waist as he pulls you into a kiss. There’s a chorus of cheers from Chenle and Jaemin, followed by a shriek of disgust from Dohwan as he covers his eyes, but you two aren’t trying to hide anymore, you want to scream from the rooftops that you’re in love. Yes, the infamous Lee Donghyuck and y/n know more than flirting and fucking. You’re in love, drunk off of a sip of it and the taste of Haechan’s lips, and god, has kissing your best friend never felt better.

“Let’s give the newlywed couple some privacy now,” Jaemin says with a grin. Gosh, he really is the spawn of Cupid, but you have to thank him. This wouldn’t be happening if it wasn’t for his stupid ‘gotcha!’ plan. “You two work this out.”

The three of them pile out, and you and Haechan part from one another to breathe. You stay in comfortable silence for a moment, his hands slipping into yours.

“Your hands are sweating,” you comment after a while.

“It’s hot.”

“It’s the middle of February.”

“So? Global warming is real, you know,” Haechan shrugs, refusing to acknowledge the fact that his hand is sweating because he’s nervous. He’s accepted that you make him feel all warm inside and his heart feel like mush, but he still isn’t used to not hiding the way you make him feel.

You laugh but don’t press things. “Newlywed couple, huh. Can’t be, you still haven’t popped the question.”

“Yeah?” He laughs, too. “Then will you take my hand in marriage and take me as your illegally wedded husband?”

You hum, pretending to contemplate, “Hmm, I don’t know. You sure you don’t wanna marry a giant cardboard Tootsie Pop cutout? Or what about that girl? What happened to her, by the way, I thought you said you liked her.”

Haechan groans, not really wanting to think about her right now, “No more Hope. Ironically, she’s a lost cause. I had to cut shit with her because she can’t comprehend what a fling is. She wanted a relationship, and you know, I lied to you when I said that I might want her. I didn’t know you liked me back until, like, now, so I was just saying shit in hopes of convincing myself I could stop liking you. That planned failed, though.”

His words lift a massive weight off of your shoulders, and you finally feel like you can breathe now. Take that, bitch, you think with a smirk. She was giggling in your face so hard at the grocery store, but you’re having the last laugh.

You tilt your head. “What about the Tootsie Pops?”

“Yeah, sorry but I can’t give them up as easily. Would you mind a Tootsie Pop bouquet?”

Gosh, this is the man you love. You roll your eyes, but smile as you reply, “You know, you’re like a Tootsie Pop.”

If Haechan were a dog, his ears would perk up right now. “How come?”

“I’ll never know how long I’ll be able to kiss you without wanting to fuck you,” you lean in his ear to purr, voice tickling his neck. You eye it and his lips, and lord knows you can’t wait to finally be able to mark him up again.

“Yeah? Wanna go home, put Dohwan to sleep, and let me take this dress off you?” He grips at your waist, his hand resting there with the burning urge to dip lower. He bites his lip.

“Thought you drew the line at sticking your dick in me,” you joke.

“That was when I was in denial about wanting you,” Haechan whispers, “but now I can admit to myself that even though you amazing in this dress, I wanna take it off of you. Your body’s perfect.”

“I kinda hate the scar on my thigh.”

“Don’t. It provides depth to your character. It makes someone wonder how you got it, the story of how it happened,” he answers, ever so deeply.

“Poetic,” you snort, “can’t tell if you’re giving me Bruno Mars or John Legend vibes more right now.”

Haechan rolls his eyes, smiling. “You said you’d never know how long you’d be able to kiss me without dying to fuck me, right?”

“I never said dying.”

He ignores you, “Then let’s put it to the test, shall we?”

Your lips wind up pressed firmly to his, with your hands on his cheek and his palms on your hips yet again. It’s fiercer than ever, Haechan’s kissing you like he doesn’t want to let you breathe, like he wants to stay in this moment with you forever. He kisses you with love and lust, with passion and desire, with emotion and no more fear in his chocolate-y eyes. You don’t regret kissing Haechan that day. It took a while, but it brought you to this moment where you can finally call him yours. And that one more kiss stuff is bullshit. His lips are yours and vice versa, and as you’re by each other’s side, you’ll never stop kissing him. And he’ll never stop kissing you.

“They’re here!” Karina suddenly bursts into the kitchen, pointing at you and Haechan. “Look! I told you they were dating!”

Oh, god. You totally forgot about Karina’s stupid bet with Mark. Mark looks entirely devastated and surprised, devastated because that’s twenty-five bucks gone from his wallet, and surprised because he genuinely believed you and Haechan have been best friends this whole time. Technically, he isn’t wrong, but you’re not sure if you want to interrupt to tell them that.

Mark whines, “Oh, c’mon! I really thought you guys were just friends.”

“Pay up, loser,” Karina smirks, and with a pout, Mark pulls cash from his pockets.

Haechan looks at you, and while you don’t say anything, you can tell you’re both thinking the exact same thing. The whole campus is about to know you two are dating. Karina’s for sure going to tell everyone she knows, hell, probably even people she doesn’t know, and there’s a ninety-nine point nine percent chance of Jaemin raining your business on everyone in his latest report for the school newspaper.

You can’t say that you care, though. This is what you wanted, to unashamedly love Haechan, to be able to state it proudly in front of everyone, to let everyone know, to claim him as yours and yours only. So fuck Cupid. Fuck his bow, fuck his arrow, because this relationship is all a product of you and Haechan’s hard work and dedication.

Who needs Cupid’s bow when you have tasty lips and Tootsie-Pops?

“You’re telling me you’ve been in love with me for the past four years? Oh, you’re a soldier. I would have given up in the first month.”

You snort. Part of becoming Haechan’s girlfriend is the process of telling one another the secrets you’ve been keeping, such as how long you can been in love. Haechan’s been in love with you for a solid year, he thinks, maybe two, but it’s been almost four years for you, on the other hand.

“If only it were that easy,” you sigh. “Trust me, I tried getting over you by getting under other people—how Jessie Reyez of me—but that didn’t work out, obviously.”

“You are too much like me,” Haechan shakes his head. “What made you think we should anyways?”

“You mean, four years ago, or now?”

Haechan shrugs. “Either. Give me three reasons.”

“Oh, brace yourself. I could do a presentation on this. One, we know each other’s McDonald’s orders. Two, like you said, we’re very alike. When have we ever argued over pizza toppings?” You reason. “Three, I can’t imagine kissing anybody else. I mean, we’ve basically been practicing on each other for the past four years. I’m the reason you can kiss so good, it would insane for you make out with other people. Four, I have a fat ass and sometimes I catch you staring at—”

“I said three reasons!” Haechan cries, face blooming red as a rose.

“I could go for a fifth,” you grin, “we’re both terrible at math.”

“Damn right we are,” he mutters. “But that’s what makes us… us, isn’t it? The only reason we’re dating right now is because we couldn’t resist kissing each other after one time.”

He’s right. It practically only took one kiss to fall in love with Haechan. He’s giving you major Dua Lipa vibes right now.

“I know you’re thinking about that Dua Lipa song right now.”

You smirk. “You know me very well.”

He tilts his head. “And what else are you thinking about?”

“That you look like all I need,” you say in tune, making Haechan laugh. “And I just want to feel your skin on mine.”

“Then we should do something about that, right?” Haechan smirks back.

You’re kissing the smirk right off his lips seconds later, and this is where you decide that you just can’t get enough of him. Even if one kiss is all it takes, you’re greedy for more, and more, and more, until both your lips are swollen and you’re both gasping for air.

#haechan smut #nct 127 smut #nct dream smut #nct smut #haechan x reader #nct imagines #haechan imagines #lee haechan smut #nct x reader #nct #nct scenarios

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svnqsn · 10 months

Text

𝑵𝑼𝑴𝑩𝑬𝑹 𝑶𝑵𝑬

☆. # SHIP — itoshi sae, gn!reader.

☆. # SYNOPSIS — you'd never thought you'd ever sit in the family box in a massive soccer stadium in spain while it's pouring rain, but here you are.

☆. # WARNINGS — none??? sae also calls reader pretty once. fuck off my blog if you think that these adjectives are gendered.

— you asked sae to teach you a little about the rules of soccer before he takes you to the stadium to see him play

— his answer was “you don't need to know the rules. your only job is to sit there, look pretty f'me and watch me win.”

— (not that this man needs one but) having you in the audience gives him the biggest ego boost ever

— immediately hands you his jacket when you two get out of the car and it's pouring rain—he'll be out on the field getting wet either way, at least one of you should be dry and warm

you two step outside after the driver drops you off at the stadium and it's pouring. the rain is heavy and doesn't look like it'll stop anytime soon, if the big, dark clouds in the sky are anything to go by. and because you're in spain, you're didn't bring a jacket and you're standing there in a t-shirt.

you look up at the sky, when suddenly something warm and heavy is placed around your shoulders. you turn and see sae standing next to you, wrapping you in his jacket.

“here,” he says and pulls the hood over your head.

— he won't have time to walk you to the box off the side of the field that's reserved for family members, but he'll definitely have someone escort you there

— as if itoshi sae's partner would ever have to walk through a sea of people by themselves. that's a no go, especially because soccer games can get a little rowdy

— you're honestly shocked at how massive the stadium is. sure, you've seen it on tv and videos, but seeing it in real life is something else entirely

— once you're seated in the little booth on the side of the field, you pull sae's jacket tighter around your body and hide your face in the collar of it

— you watch as the players jog out, clutch the necklace with his jersey number in your fist and give it a little kiss

his eyes find you easily during the game. he doesn't look at you often during it, but whenever he does, his eyes seem to say “you only need to look at me.”

— honestly, the game goes as both sae and you had already expected: sae's team wins with 5:3 and sae makes the last goal

he definitely looks at you after he scores the final goal. his eyes immediately search for you and he looks over to see if you were watching him. you definitely were. he doesn't do anything, but a smirk lights up his face a little.

he feels so good when he sees you standing there, cheering for him. it's the only form of acknowledgment he really needs. he doesn't care for his teammates that come over to give him a slap on the back and he skill fully avoids a few side hugs, but his eyes stay focused on your face.

— i feel like he isn't the type to run up to you after a won game or anything like that. he wins all the time so he doesn't rlly see it as a special enough occasion to do anything like that?? like. he never expects to lose so,,, yk he doesn't see why he should make a big show out of it.

— but when you're both at home, you tell him how cool he was and how good and sae acts like it isn't a big deal

— goes on to say stuff like “it was obvious that i would win.” but inside his ego grows so much when you say stuff like that

— aka don't do it too much. he already has a big enough head tbh /jk

#╭ noé's writing დ #ᦈ ᴛsᴜᴋɪ ɢᴀ ᴋɪʀᴇɪ ᴅᴇsᴜ ɴᴇ ɞ #blue lock x reader #blue lock x you #blue lock x female reader #blue lock x y/n #itoshi sae x y/n #itoshi sae x you #itoshi sae x reader #sae x reader #sae x y/n #sae x you #did i google ‘how often does it rain in spain’ for this?#yes. yes i did.#i'm still not entirely sure what layout i wanna go with #so bear with me here

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4kiraa · 1 year

Text

just thinking about astumu being whipped for his cute nerd of a gf…(aka me)

cw: fluff, atsumu being annoying asl like always, reader has glasses

Pre boyfriend atsumu who’s friends always thought he’d try and settle for those rich popular blondies who attracted attention everywhere they went, but where surprised when they caught him ogling at you, the smart quite girl in his english class who never spoke in class.

Pre boyfriend atsumu who was in a trance by your beauty. it was a type of beauty that only those closest to you would notice. he was enamoured with your soft features and would often get caught by his friends staring you down like the creep he is

Pre boyfriend atsumu who would make it a goal to flunk every single english test he had (not that he would’ve passed anyways) so that you could tutor him. He remembers your face vividly, you looking up at him with those pretty soft eyes of yours tilting your head in confusion when he first asked you for help. atsumu was one of the most popular guys at your school, he had many friends, so why would he ask you for help you remember questioning yourself. but you agreed nonetheless.

Pre boyfriend atsumu who’s face flushed a deep shade of red when you both decided to study at his place. the girl he’s been pinning on for months is talking to him, the girl he’s been pinning on for months agreed to study with him, the girl who he’s been pinning on for months is sitting on his bed ‘holy shit’ he thought.

Pre boyfriend atsumu who you and him now have a weekly routine of study together. Him bringing all your favourite snacks to eat while discussing over school and life. He makes it a goal to learn at least one new thing about you. writing it down on one of those tiny journals that you had gotten him as a gift for passing his english test

Pre boyfriend atsumu who you admit, thought he would be one of those stuck up popular kids, and when he asked you to study, you thought it was some kind of elaborate joke. But atsumu had a side to him that you’ve never seen in anyone before. yes he was a tease who would steal your glasses and ask how many fingers he was holding up, and yes he would sometimes twirl your hair between his fingers when he was bored with the study session, but he probably had the biggest heart ever. always going over to your house whenever you were sick to take care of you, and buying you strawberry milk from the vending machines as a thanks for helping him.

Pre boyfriend atsumu who works up the courage to ask you if you’ve ever been in a relationship. at first you stare blankly at him, pondering around the question, and then you tell him no. atsumu is shocked but nonetheless happy. “What!? yer’ telling me that no one’s ever asked you out on a date?!” your eyebrows scrunch up in confusion. you ask the blonde haired man why its so surprising. he turns over to you so that the both of you are face to face and he simply respond “cuz yer beautiful, n’ any guy that gets that chance to go out with ya, man, that’s one lucky guy” you feel heat rise up to you cheeks and before you can respond he asks you a question you’ll never forget, “so, will ya let me be that lucky guy” you look into his equally soft eyes smiling at him and saying “yes” before kissing his pretty pink lips

Pre boyfriend atsumu who looks out for your pretty little face out on the benches whenever he’s playing a game

Pre boyfriend atsumu who’s always spoiling you whenever you two go out on dates (despite your protests)

Boyfriend atsumu being whipped for his cute nerd of a gf

i got lazy at the end my bad bruh

#haikyuu #haikyuu x you #haikyuu x reader #atsumu x reader #atsumu haikyuu #atsumu fluff #haikyuu fluff

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the-cat-and-the-birdie · 10 months

Note

no please bc just once I wanna make hobie nervous flustered.. like why can’t he can’t be intimated by me why I always gotta be intimidated by him 🙄🙄

TRULLLYY The opportunities are endless!! Let's talk about it!!!!!!!!!!!

Hobie Brown Loves Feminists and Defying the Patriarchy aka Hobie Brown and Writing write Non-Conventional Romantic Relationships in 'x-readers'

[this is an analysis where I analyze Hobie Brown, non-conventional relationships, and how feminism factors in to it all. Basically a critique/dive/rant into the narrow 'x-reader culture' in the Hobie Fandom

I touch on issues in Smut, labels, and how we can write 'Y/N's that challenge that status quo and fit Hobie better. I also break down how I personally use feminist themes to write a non-conventional relationship for Hobie.] [Also there's now a PART 2 HERE]

Despite the man from the 1970's - the era of bra-burning second-wave feminism - I don't ever think I've seen anyone talk about it, him, and how it influences him.

We all know Hobie isn't down with labels, but it seems like in X-Fem!Reader, the only two options out there are play-boy guitarist and traditional out-of-the-box boyfriend.

Hobie. The man he follows no social quo. Don't expect flowers from him.

Hobie diverges from the norm in nearly every way, and he does it purposefully and intentionally. And I think that'd extend to his romantic relationships too.

So why do we only see him in heteronormative, traditional gender-role based relationships?

Would Hobie be into this? And does the way we write him and his relationships in x-writers serve Hobie emotionally, allowing him to be a full character? (No, they don't.)

How can begin to acknowledge that, just like Hobie cares about race, and class, and housing and queer rights - he'd care about feminism too.

And how would that influence him in romance? How can we start writing healthier x-reader's?

We have enough insecure, blushing 'Y/N's being woo'd by [insert tumblr sexy man]'. Hobie can have so much more - in the words of Beyonce "Where the ladies up in here who like to talk back?!"

Hobie Brown, Romance, and Gender Roles

Why can I be the one calling him 'love', and 'darling', and 'sweetheart'?

Where's the fic where I'm the one comforting and taking care of him when he's sick/down?

Why can't Hobie be the one asked to be held?

There's something lacking here!!!!!!!

I honestly think Hobie would be into it, and find it very attractive - having a feminine partner who defies gender roles in their relationship purposefully and proudly.

Hobie loves subverting expectations and challenging society. So, and seeing many people unthinkingly assume he'd have a completely normal, routine heterosexual relationship without question -- uhhh I don't like that!!!

Like, Hobie is very clearly attractive. He's like 6'5", a guitarist, and punk. Let's be real, people of any gender are gonna be flirting with him, whether he's into it or not. He without a doubt gets flirted at all the time.

I think he'd love someone who cuts the bullshit and is like "You're really cute. I've got the biggest crush on you."

Not in a pushy way, but a relaxed way.

But I hardly ever see the x-reader advances being initiated by the reader. Why? It can be really nice to take the confidence to ask someone out and they say yes.

In fact, a lot of x-readers are written demure, passive, and down-right unhealthy in their ability to defend themselves and stand alone. So many are based off the x reader needing Hobie for some reason, whether it be confidence, or protection, or for him to teach them something.

Never Hobie needing the reader for something. Never Hobie being the one to express emotion and need comfort.

Which is funny, because Hobie can show emotions like anger, which he does in the comics. That's NEVER brought up in fics. In no fic do we have the reader witness Hobie hitting someone with a guitar or kicking them in the face. Which Hobie does do.

No, that's too violent for the romanticized fandom of Hobie. He has to be the good boyfriend to the shy girlfriend.

And I feel like there's a reason many of these x-readers are written this way - is heteronormativity and a dash of misogyny-flavored sexism involved??? maybe.

Especially with x fem readers, feminine people are always expected to be passive and submissive. Women in the real world are expected to mute their advances and 'be coy' for the sake of sexist 'respectability'.

We're taught that 'giving them the eyes' is (somehow??) an 'advance'. Or that you have to wait to be asked out or else you're 'too forward'.

[Insert Barbie Movie Monologue here]

Personally, I think Hobie would be SO refreshed by a girl who comes up to him and is like "Hey, are you busy on Friday? Do you wanna meet me then? I wanna go on a date with you."

Because, realistically 95% of the people in the Hobie fandom - including me - would probably be too nervous to even speak a sentence to Hobie.

So for someone to approach him directly, state their intentions, and be so open to potential rejection, that's impressive - I think he'd LOVE that shit!!!

I think it's a nice juxtaposition to have him with someone who diverges from the 'demure ideal of a girlfriend'.

A girl who walks around like Jessica Drew. Walks in the room like "My man is SEXY AF and he about to walk in so LOOK. BE JEALOUS."

I imagine so many people around him try to act like they DON'T like Hobie when they clearly do - and he can tell. So to have someone who isn't hiding it is a kind of candidness that differs from it all.

So often are women forced into the passive role of waiting to be 'chosen'. Fuck that, you want him, go get him.

Hobie, Romance, and Labels

I also think Hobie would REALLY like a partner who knows what they want.

I always see people be like 'Hobie doesn't like labels!! He wants to keep it casual!' or 'Nooo he was kidding about the labels thing - he'd love a committe-'

WHO SAYS HE'D BE THE ONE DEFINING THE SITUATION????????? WHO SAID HE GETS THE LAST SAY???!!!!!

I feel like Hobie would go fucking NUTS for a girl who is straight up like "yeah I'm just trying to fuck. Are you okay with that?" or "I like what we've got going on. I'm not looking for anything serious, but let's keep going."

Or a partner that is very clear about their labels. A person who's like "I like you but if you're not trying to be exclusive I'm gonna get a move on." Because he's not gonna have you out here looking DUMB, people better know you're in the mfing picture.

That's some grown ass shit! It shows she knows what she wants and that she's not wavering on it, even for him. He's with it. I don't think Hobie would be down to be like "I'm ur boyfriend now" OR "I'm ONLY down for fucking lol srry'.

She gets a say too. And she should be clear on what she wants.

If she's the one to take the initiative and name the game - that's great for him. He's down for whatever, what is it that YOU wanna do??

Hobie, Romance, and Intimacy (like for the grown folks 18+) __________________________________

🔞

In a LOT of fic and especially SMUT, it's always Hobie making the advances, or at least initiating them. In society, women are taught that's how is, that being sexually 'aggressive' and proactive - not just SUGGESTIVE - is inappropriate.

Wait till Hobie slaps your ass, then the smut could start. Wait till Hobie kisses you, then there's romance.

Nah, I'm the one smacking his ass. I'm the one pulling his belt loop saying Come 'ere. What if I'm the one who wants to pull him down for a first kiss, huh??? I gotta wait??

Even in dialogue-

In a lot of fics Hobie can talk as raunchy as ever, but the woman can't say 'pussy'? Hobie can say three sentences straight about how my coochie feel but the reader only gets to moan submissive requests back??

Can the dirty talk be two-sided? Because women should be allowed to be vocal in their pleasure.

Hobie can tell you he wants you to suck his dick, but when's the reader gonna say "Come eat this pussy like you mean it." HM??????

In fics the reader can only be suggestive - in order to bait him into initiating, like sending him a suggestive picture or throwing a bra on stage. But it's hardly ever the other way around. With the reader being the one to say 'Enough of the teasing, we fucking NEOW.'

Because in our society, a guy slipping a girl's shirt off to get the scene going is hot. But a woman going for a guys belt before he begins to undress her - nooo, that's too forward.

Maybe Hobie wants to feel like the sexy, desired, sought after one.

_______________________________________________

Hobie, Romance and Feminism

Let it be known: Hobie loves people who are socially educated!!!!

If you can look at him and explain what anarchism actually is - like in a politcal theory sense - I think he'd be impressed, because you're seeing through the 'pseudo-rockstar' persona he puts on.

Most if not all of his actions are choice are driven by political action, so having a partner educated in things like anarchy or communism just makes sense with him. Hobie cares about stuff like that, and actually goes out of his way to study and live in line with those ideals.

That includes feminism!!!

I think Hobie would love a girlfriend who is invested in feminism, cares about it, and thinks about it in her decision making.

A woman that is educated about her oppression and how to combat it, and purposefully goes against the strict stereotype labeled on women - especially feminine women - as an act of protest.

A girl who can and will defend herself, go off on, or put a sexist pig in their place. You can't tell me he wouldn't be into that.

Social movements of the oppressed are super important to Hobie, and I think feminism is the same, but I never see it mentioned.

I definitely think that Hobie would have a clear understanding of his privilege as a man and how that effects relationships.

I can see him being like "I'd never propose." Not because he hates labels, but because he acknowledges that for centuries marriage was used as a financial and social transaction to oppress and control women and their bodies, and he doesn't want to be involved in that.

Hit him with that "Same - the gold and diamond rings are trash anyway. Both materials being mined and pillaged in African nations for centuries at the expense of the indigenous populations really puts me off it."

He'd wanna somehow find a way to marry you without marrying you you know what i mean

Hobie loves feminism and feminists. Give him a 70's bra-burning feminism so help me god. He was alive for Roe v. Wade passing (1973), he KNOWS about feminism and probably knows many outspoken feminists.

Hobie, Romance and Individuality

You know what I don't like?

Headcanons or fics that be like "You and Hobie NEVER disagree or argue. Never ever, you always talk it out."

Like...Bullshit. I'm sorry but I don't think it's very realistic.

Hobie is a very opinionated too. He's very outspoken and when it comes to topics, and he usually knows exactly where he stands. I think, without a doubt he'd care what his partner thinks too.

Asking them about a record that's playing, or what they think of a movie they saw in the past, or a new political issue going on. He'd absolutely ask, because he cares. He's interested.

If if ya'll are never disagreeing that means:

Either you agree with his opinion all the time without fail or exception OR

You're biting your tongue around him

I don't think one is very realistic in terms of things. You can't like every song your boyfriend likes. You can't like every movie he shows you, or agree on EVERY political issue. That's not how people are.

And for two - if you're biting your tongue around him, he'll notice.

Yes, Hobie is a very emotionally intelligent person and extremely compassionate. But he's also very strong in his morals, thoughts, and beliefs. He doesn't budge.

If you're biting your tongue, I'd imagine he'd be like "You wanna say something." or "Whatever you're thinking just say it." cause he can see it in your face.

He's not trying to put you on the spot, he just wants to know what you're thinking.

When you explain what you're thinking, he's probably gonna wanna hear why, and respond, etc etc.

Hobie is a very individualistic person, and I think he'd be drawn to someone who is as well. Someone who is solid in their opinions and personhood enough to express them.

It leads to interesting conversation and knowing each other deeper -It's a form of intimacy.

If you watch a film with him and don't like it, he's gonna ask why. Did you not like the theme? Was the dialogue bad? What part did you think sucked the most, he thought x, y, z. What do you think about the part he disliked, did you notice a,b,c?

I feel like Hobie would want to know his partner deeply, and he'd care and love the things that make them different from each other.

Including differing opinions.

Discussions and debates aren't bad. Discussing something and getting heated defending your point can be really fun and stimulating, if it's with someone you care about and the two parties are mature and not assholes.

Tell him why you think he's wrong about something - he wants an excuse to talk more about his opinion. INTELLECTUALLY CHALLENGE HIM DONT JUST AGREE.

Along with being very individualistic, Hobie is very independent. He refused to rely on the Society for their watches - he made his own. So I think the next important thing to him is:

Hobie, Romance and Independence

I like the idea of Hobie having a partner that has their own place and is committed to that, and their space.

Or a partner that emotionally supports him!!

95% of the time, he's the one asking what's wrong, or holding reader, or comforting them.

Can we get hectic bf and organized girlfriend energy?? A gf where he says plans during missions and she's like "What are you thinking? You're gonna get us killed."

A gf that soothes HIM when he gets angry - cause comic Hobie GETS angry, especially after a fight.

Give me ONE, ONE fic where he's drunk coming from a pub and READER has to deal with drunk Hobie and put him to bed.

Hobie is ALWAYS expected to take care of himself, and the people around him. He takes pride in this and he's good at it. But why should he have to do it all the time?

_____________________________________________

In general,

Hobie is a confident person. He knows what he wants, and how to handle himself, and how to approach people and get respect just by being himself. He's assured, and outspoken, and VERY independent. He does what he wants, when he wants and lets you know when it happens

I think pairing him with a confident, assured, outspoked, independent person is only natural. I think him having a relationship with a personality like his would be a ROCK SOLID one.

There's be no fics like 'Groupies were bullying you' because his she would be like "Sis, if I swing on you he isn't gonna hold me back so be careful."

I want a reader that when they do that trope of 'A girl was flirting in front of him making you insecure and uncomfortable' - The reader squashes it right there. Like "Girl, I know you see me standing here. You know we're together. Cut the cute shit!!"

I'm tired of fics taking me for an insecure, submissive, demure, sexually innocent, wimp of a babydoll girlfriend that needs to be babied at every turn. There's nothing wrong with being shy and demure, but when it's all you're offering it's not gonna cut it.

Especially not for Hobie Brown.

Let the tall, dark, actively oppressed black man be the one to vent, or be held, or romanced, and spoken sweetly too. There's so many comfort fics, but not many of them consider Hobie's own trauma - and how a relationship could include that.

Hobie Brown deserves more.

_______________________________________________

If you wanna know how I use this to write a non-conventional relationship for Hobie, that's below this break.

Okay so I'mma leave it here but if you read this far, thank you!!!! I be SO pissed when fics be talking me (Y/N) as a punk (in the wimpy sense not the Hobie sense). Like...nah I wouldve said something in a lot of situations. Irk my last nerve. Like the one where the girl PINCHES you??? Like?? Nah I we would've been fighting, I'm sorry this is unrealistic

Alsooo the section below is about my Spidersona Disco-Spider and how I encorporated all of this into her creation- because I wanted to write a sona who subtly defied gender roles while still being feminine. So if you wanna read there thank you so much, and if not, thanks for reading this far! He's a pic of Hobie in thanks!

[If you wanna check out Part 2 for direct examples, how to write NCRs, and a more in depth look into Disco and Hobie - check it out here]

_______________________________________________

DiscoSpider Diane and The Great Groupie Act [How I use all of this to a write a feminist Spidersona and a non-conventional relationship]

Diane is a HUGE Hobie Groupie - and that's kinda of her main thing.

She runs the Hobie Brown Fanclub on campus, attends all his shows, and wears his guitar pick. She's into him and she's not afraid to show it.

I wanted to write Diane as a purposeful groupie, one who is fine with the title, and even leans into it. Because a lot of the time - and in a lot of fics including guitarists - 'groupie' is seen as a negative thing.

Like K-pop stans, being a 'groupie' - and openly expressing your romantic interest in a hot guy is seen as desperation.

But I wanted to write her as one in spite of this. To swap 'desperation' for unwavering boldness. A girl with the motto 'Closed mouths don't get fed'.

And much like Hobie uses the 'typical punk' label to disarm others, I wanted Diane to mirror that - in the opposite direction.

Diane is a self-proclaimed groupie. And because of that, many (mainly misogynists) assume that she can't think for herself - or at all. And Diane can use that to her advantage.

If Miguel and Jess really believe she only cares about conversations involving Hobie, then they'll talk like she isn't there. And she can listen. If it looks like she's hanging all over him, no one realizes if she's slipping him information.

And it also helps in their relationship.

They both enjoy their privacy.

HQ prohibits relationships between Spidey-people. It's an anomaly waiting to happen - and they make sure to keep a close eye out for it. Plus with Jess breathing down her neck, it's much easier for Diane and Hobie to just keep it underwraps.

In comes the Groupie persona.

No one actually expects the groupie to get the guy. She's desperate, and he's the player guitarist. Plus, if they were dating she couldn't be a 'groupie' right? They wouldn't make sense, would it?

They let people make their own assumptions. By calling herself a groupie, suddenly people think there's no possible way there's something going on, and they don't look closer.

This also allows them the freedom of no labels. Are they boyfriend and girlfriend? Nah she's his groupie. Quit asking questions.

All of this allows me to write Disco in a way that connects back to everything in this post.

By calling herself a 'Groupie' suddenly Diane can subvert expectations of affection, avoid the pressures of labels, and control her image and the amount of information she lets on to people

That in turn helps me write their relationship in a nonconventional way - a way that challenges misogyny around affection and reclaims a sexist fan trope for something more empowering.

Sure, the concept seems silly at first. The ditsy, bubbly, party girl on campus, but I wanted there to be a reason and drive behind it.

Disco-Spider Diane is exactly who she wants to be, an unapologetic, outspoken disco-girl. One that's highly educated and knows her shit.

And also a huge groupie.

-----------------------------------------------

If you've read this far, thank you so much. It genuinely means a lot to me! This is reaaaaaallly long.

[Part 2 here]

Now how about you take this photo of Hobie and we both pretend like me writing this is normal well-adjusted behavior okay? okay

Bye.

#im back and I got something to say!!!!!!#these are just my opinions and Headcanons #but also they're correct I know because I'm with Hobie right now in my mind palace and he told me all this #no proofread ever lolllll #spiderman #atsv #hobie brown #marvel #spider man #spider punk #spiderpunk #across the spiderverse #hobie brown x reader #hobie brown x oc #hobie brown x you #hobie brown x y/n #atsv anaylsis

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justaaveragereader · 8 months

Text

10.08 || SlenderMan!Mingi

Pairing: Song Mingi x Reader

Word Count: 2.6k

Warnings: Dom!Mingi, Sub Reader, Breast Play, Clit Play, Squirting, Tentacle Fucking, Cum Eating, Restraining, Orgasm Denial, Choking, Slight Teasing, If I Missed Anything..Let Me Know🫣.

A/N: There might be some spelling errors, I misplaced my glasses, and each of my eyes have a different prescription😒. So I wrote this with one eye open, aka my eye that is near sighted. So Im sorry for the errors😭!

Kinktober Masterlist

“Mingi..? Mingi…? Are you out here?” You whisper yell. You had seen Mingi take off into the woodys area in a hurry. Walking around in a hurry trying to find any sign of where Mingi went. Agreeing with all the members that you would split up to search for the big man. At least an hour had to have passed by, your feet were starting to get tired. You hear soft like muffles nearby. Despite what your gut is telling you, you walk closer to the noise. Humming nonsense to yourself to ease your nerves. Pulling out your phone to check the time, you look at your signal bars realizing you have absolutely no signal. If you were to get stuck or lose out here you will have to find your way back on your own. As you are getting closer to the noise, you see a big broad back in a crouching position, quickening your pace you whisper yell once more.

“Mingles! Mingles, is that you?” Hesitating to step any closer just in case it in fact wasn’t Mingi. You pick up a small tig, tossing it at the broad back. When they move just an inch, you realize this thing is way bigger than Mingi, way bigger than any human in fact. Backing away slowly, trying your best to not make much noise. You walk backwards, refusing to turn on whatever was sitting in front of you. When the figure suddenly stands up swiftly. The sudden movement causes you to stumble a bit, yet you don’t fall, you freeze. A loud cracking noise comes as it stretches its body out to its full size. Standing at about 7 feet tall, with a thin pale body your stomach feels like it’s churning. You can feel the sweat drop down your spine, damn Song Mingi, damn him for running into this area, damn everyone listening to Wooyoungs advice on splitting up, and damn your dumb crush on Song Mingi.

Suddenly the creature decides to turn towards you, barely making a noise with its huge stature. You feel your stomach fall immediately, its Mingi. Staring at him with huge eyes, you are soaking in his form. His face is stretched into the biggest intimidating grin you’ve ever seen. When suddenly you hear two bursting noises, black tentacles emerging from his back. Feeling your fight or flight kick in, you dash off. Turning around, trying your best to get as far away as your legs can take you. Your mind is screaming ‘get as far as possible’ failing to notice the scenery around you is changing. It looks so gray out, trees flaking like they are ash. Coming to a screeching halt you stand in the middle of the forest. Chest heaving up and down, refusing to scream for any of your other friends, too terrified to alert whatever it was you saw back there. When you feel something slither across your backside. Too stunned to move, you freeze. Your breath is ragged, slowly turning your head you see Mingi in his large form with black tentacles forming around him, with one extended out. His face was covered in a cocky smirk. Biting your lip to hold your nerves. You let out a breath, turning around, you look at him in his huge form. Trying to brave face it the best way you knew how, bluffing.

“I want to go home. Now.” You squint your eyes at him, hoping he doesn’t call your bluff. Letting out a clicking noise, he shakes his head side to side. His dark and blonde hair shifting with the movement. Peeling himself off the tree, tentacles trailing along with him, he steps a foot in front of you. His dark eyes swirling.

“You know I can’t do that.” He whispers out, one of his black tentacles brushes the side of your face, your body recoiling at the slick feel of it. You continue to lock eyes with him, puffing your chest out slightly. You feel another tentacle slither its way up your pants leg, rubbing back and forth on your hip bone. Shuttering lightly you turn your head, refusing to keep eye contact with him any longer. Mingi always had this effect on you, you always thought you him under your spell, little did you know it was the other way around. His naive persona was just an act.

“Why can’t you do that? Where is everyone? Where are we Mingi, if I can even call you that.” You spit fire questions off to him. Wanting to get answers, your nerves still on high alert. Another tentacle runs up your spine, settling at the back of your neck, brushing over the skin slightly, trying to comfort you.

“I’m still Mingi, it’s still me, always has been, always will be.”

Rolling your eyes you let out a huff, your nerves calming slightly, you don’t know if it’s the cool appendage on the back of your neck trying to console you or the fact that this monster is confirmed to be Mingi.

“Everyone is still here, they just can’t see us, we aren’t in their world. We are in mine.” Ending his sentence with a pur that makes your body hot. You have never seen such a dominant side of Mingi. It was the running gag that he had no dominant bone in his body, yet here he was 7ft tall, voice raspier than what it was. Nodding your head to let him know you were hearing him.

“Look at me.” He speaks out in a low tone. Your eyes shoot over to him. Your body shivering at the tentacle that wrapped itself around your neck. You’d be lying if you said this side of Mingi didn’t turn you on, he didn’t fret, he didn’t shy away, he demanded what he wanted, he spoke with authority. The tentacle around your neck gives you a slight squeeze, taking you by surprise you let out a small whimper. Eyes growing big you slap a hand over your mouth, the heat creeps up your spine, clearly embarrassed.

“You wanna fuck me don’t you?” He says matter of factly. Refusing to make eye contact with you, you remain quiet. The tentacle around your neck squeezes once again, while another pushes your chin forward so you look at him.

“Did I say take your eyes off of me?” He grits out.

“N-no.” You whisper out, stuttering over one simple word.

“Keep your eyes on me baby.” He whispers out, stepping closer to you, three of his tentacles still high in the air. While one remains rubbing your back, one around your neck, and the other keeping your chin forward. As he steps closer you swear he grows in size with each step.

“You always were such a pretty thing. Your eyes sparkle everytime you look at me. Even in this form they sparkle.” He whispers out, letting his eyes rake over your form. Bending down, he puts his nose in your neck, catching a whiff of your scent. Chuckling to himself.

“Wanna know a secret?” His cold lips are on your ear.

“I can smell your dripping pussy from here.” He nibbles on your earlobe, chuckling before stepping back.

“Who would’ve known you were such a masochist.” His tentacle around your neck squeezes tighter, the one brushing your back, slides down, slipping under your shirt. Hesitating to touch you, which you can sense.

“You have my permission..” you whisper out, staring up at Mingi. The rest of his tentacles come flying towards your body, one is wiggling under your shirt, one is busy flicking the button to your pants open, while the other is trying to strip you of any clothes. The smooth appendages run across your body, littering you with goosebumps at the coolness of them, they are growing damper within each second that it runs across your skin. With your pants around your ankles, your shirt tossed on the ashing floor. Your bra pulled down below your breast, he wastes no time, one of the thicker tentacles makes its way to your cunt, sliding over it collecting the slick that’s coming from you. Four tentacles hold you in the air, while the other is on your breast, the tip of it flickering over your perked buds.

With each moan you let out the tentacles that are wrapped around your ankles and wrists grow tighter, not too painful, tight to where you know this is Mingi holding himself back as much as he can. The tentacle from your cunt goes to play with your nipples. Aiding the other one in flicking them, your slick from your cunt is now covering your chest, mixing with the wetness coming from each appendage. You let out a breathy moan at each flick of your nipple. Your body jolts in his tight grasp. Biting your lip you cock your head back, clearly getting off at him just playing with your chest.

In a breathless tone you whisper out Mingis name. Signaling to him that you were close, he hadn’t even touched you much but the way he was playing with your chest, you would’ve assumed he practiced this before. Letting out a groan, he slightly shifts his body, one of the tentacles squeezing your nipple hard, letting out a cry, you try to close your legs to try to get some friction on your neglected cunt. His thinner tentacle comes to run slightly upon your clit, he can feel your legs shake already, flicking its thin tip against your puffy clit, he picks up speed, a thick clear slime is smearing all over your folds with each flick. Your toes clench in your shoes, your breathing picking up.

“Mi-Mingi!” You yell out, the tentacle halts its movements on your clit. Making you let out a high pitch whine. Letting out a small chuckle he brings you closer to him, body still suspended mid air. His thin tentacle pushes with slight pressure against your clit. Making you let out a breathless moan.

“Poor baby wants to cum already.” He stated, not even paying attention to your face as your eyes crinkled up, you could feel your clit throbbing. His thinner tentacle covered in the clear slime, slithered down to your hole, inserting itself real slowly, exploring each and every part of your cunt. You let out a gasp as it pushes against your spongy spot. Rubbing against it slowly.

“Mingi please, please, please.” You beg out, dragging your sentence hoping he’d get the jist, spare you some mercy, any and everything you were willing to pull out in order for you to cum. Letting out a mocking chuckle.

“I don’t know, this is fun. But you do sound so pretty when you beg.”

Pulling you even closer his thick tentacle snakes its way between your folds, slicking up with your own arousal, before slipping into you. Causing you to let out a loud gasp at the size difference. This tentacle was wall to wall in your cunt. Bringing your body closer to his face, your breast sitting right in front of him, letting his tongue flicker out, he swipes at your nipple. Causing you to jolt once again in his hold. Bringing his hand up to grip your neck, applying pressure on the sides. At this rate you were convinced if he even looked at you, you’d cum on the spot. Moving your head so it hangs low, he holds your jaw in place with two of his fingers, making you remain in eye contact with him. His mouth latches onto your nipple, suckling it, his plush, cool lips against your skin, has your toes clenching once more. His thick tentacle replaces the thinner one, moving slowly in and out of you, making sure to push against your spongy spot each time. The thinner one wraps itself around your clit. Feeling so many sensations at once has your eyes rolling back.

“Oh my fuckinggg godddd.” You slur out, head trying to cock back but Mingi keeps his hold on your face, this mouth taking a break from one of your nipples before moving onto the other.

“Eyes on me baby, eyes on me.” He grunts out, his hips shifting slightly, you can feel the sweat drip down your back, your skin prickles with need. Blowing on your other nipple to make sure it remains hard. Your cunt is pouring with arousal.

“Mingi please, please move faster.” You say through a whine. Sucking on your nipple a bit harsher, he gently nibbles on it. He starts pistoning his thick tentacle in and out of you, while his thinner one strums your clit. His other hand comes up to pinch your nipple trying to give you the most earth shattering orgasm you can have.

“Eyes on me baby, you going to cum for me?” He purrs out through in his deep, raspy voice. It feels like your whole body is pulsating. You can feel his thick tentacle pulsating inside of you, adding on to the pleasure.

“Yes! Yes! Yes!” You scream out, your hands are balled into tight fists. Your orgasm crashes over you, Mingis thick tentacle still hammers away at your spot, while the thinner one slows down on your clit, lightly massaging it, your legs shake in the grasp of his tentacles. Suspending you in mid air, he positions your orgasming body right over his head, cocking his head back, opening his mouth he catches the juices that spill out of you while remaining eye contact with you. Seeing this sight pushes you over the edge once more, having two shocking orgasms back to back, if it wasn’t for his tight grip on you, you would’ve wiggled your way out of his hold. Your knees buckle, arching your back you let out a shattering scream, squirting right into his mouth, his long tongue sticks out, catching your juices like a happy dog he holds you up for a couple more minutes. Making sure that he caught any and every drop of your orgasm.

His thick tentacle slowly retracts itself, as it pulls out more of your cum splashes onto his awaiting tongue. The thinner tentacle pulls back, tapping your clit once more before moving away. Your chest is heaving, your forehead is dripping sweat, you are convinced you just saw God flash before your eyes, you are convinced Song Mingi is that God. Slowly putting you on the ground, your legs buckle immediately. Mingi swiftly catches you, letting out a low hum, he rubs your bare waist. Retracting his tentacles back into his body. Cupping the back of your head, he rubs the space below your ear. Your body is exhausted, you feel his brick hard cock against your lower belly. Pulling back slightly you realize you are back in the forest, clothes on, back in reality with a shy timid Mingi looking at you with a blush on his cheeks.

“You found her!” Yunho screeches out, whipping your head around as you look at the members in awe. Clearly dumbstruck.

“I hope she didn’t cause anyone to panic. She had taken a tumble, don’t worry though I helped her up. I think her legs might be injured.” Mingi says, scratching the back of his neck. Blush running down to his covered chest. All the members start arguing amongst themselves about why you had gotten hurt, passing the blame around to each other. Talking about how if they wouldn’t have split you wouldn’t have gotten injured. Wooyoung rants about how you were the one who ran off into the forest, while all the members came looking for you, not Mingi.

“If you need me to carry you baby, that’s all you gotta say. Matter of fact, I still haven’t even gotten the chance to cum in that pretty pussy of yours.” Mingi whispers into your ear, so low that no one can hear him except you. His now warm lips brushing against the shell of your ear. Taken back by his sudden boldness, you lock eyes with him, you can see the darkness that swirls within his eyes.

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ftmtftm · 4 months

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I've been scrolling through your blog, and I saw your post about discussing the racialized nature of gender. As someone who has several transmasc POC friends, and someone who's a nonbinary POC themself, I wanted to give my 2 cents.

It's important to understand that "woman" in the "man vs woman" gender binary is a colonialist, white supremacist construct, especially in Western countries where you are the numerical minority. My trans friends aren't on T, they haven't gotten top surgery, we are all quite young. But they all have numerous stories about being addressed as "sir" which brings them euphoria but as one person said, while we were making fun of the amount of white people in our club, "Due to my race and skin color, I get masculinized."

And again I'd like to emphasize, that since we're young, none of us really have medically transitioned due to financial and familial barriers. Their hair is long, our binders we definitely have notable chests, and even if they dress masculine, it's notable that no one in our communities would ever gender us properly. It's often white people calling them "sir." Again, I think this reflects how gender performances in mainstream queer communities are deeply White. Like, trans boys talk about having haircuts, but only one of my friends has that wavier, more manageable hair that will help them pass. When you've got curly/kinky hair, the standards are different. For a white person, what's the difference between a "girl" Afro and a boy "Afro"? White cis people have a harder time identifying us, and literally talk to any black girl, and they'll tell you about being mocked, dehumanized, and called "manly".

I don't have much else to say. These are just my personal experiences. But if you want to be an ally to POC in the queer community, this is why it's so fucking important to bring in colonialism/imperialism/white supremacy into discussions of queer liberation. My biggest gripe with ignorant white queers is when they ignore their white privilege, and act like "cishets" (AKA the patriarchal system regulating sexuality and gender) is the only enemy. Because cishet POC deal with plenty of shit with being infantilized, masculinized, feminized, seen as brutish & dangerous, the list goes on. Doberbutts had a post saying, "Believe me, your family's going to care more about me being black than my queerness." towards his white partners. Acknowledging and creating a framework that centers these intersections of queerness and race into your beliefs is true allyship. This is why if you're not anti-imperialist, anti-capitalist, ACAB...I do not think you care for queer liberation. None of us are free until all of us are free.

Please don't view this post as an attack. But this is my perspective, and I thought you'd be receptive to me sharing my lived experiences.

Oh I absolutely don't view this ask as an attack, and I really appreciate you bringing these things up because you're right! Like, just very plainly: You are right and your and your friends lived experiences are extremely important to the conversation on the racialized aspects of gender.

It gets me thinking about where Misogynoir and the social White Fear of Black manhood intersect for Black trans men in particular. Because Black women and Women of Color in general are masculinized by White gender standards and the ways in which Black trans masculine people are gendered in alignment with their identity is absolutely not always done with gender affirming intent. In fact, it's often actually done with racist intent or is fueled by racist bias when it's coming from White people or even from non-Black POC.

That's kind of restating things you've said but differently, it's just such a topic worth highlighting explicitly since it's extremely relevant to the conversation that's been happening about Male Privilege here the last few days.

I do think I know exactly what @doberbutts post you're talking about and yeah. It's just truth. It's something Black queer people have been talking about for ages in both theory and in pop culture (my mind immediately goes to Kevin Abstract and "American Boyfriend") where Black queer/trans identity is both materially different from (neutral) and is treated differently from (negative) White queer/trans identity in multitudes of ways and those differences are worth sharing and exploring and talking about.

Genuinely, thank you for sharing! I try really hard not to lead these kinds of conversations outside of explicitly referencing back to non-White theorists because I don't particularly feel like it's my place to do so, but I will always provide a platform for them because they're extremely important conversations to be had.

#asks #anon #racialized gender #male privilege #transandrophobia

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brandnewhuman · 2 years

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BEHOLD THE MALEWIFE

Again

♡ part 2 of random hc ♡

☆ starring ☆

König aka my beloved giant unfairly underrated and overlooked

Tw: mature language, mentions of anxiety, tiny bit of angst like you have to squint really hard

A/N: first i have to thank @bloodlst for giving me so many ideas and for dealing with me and my endless rants about this absolutely scrunkly babe. I SHOULD BE DOING REQUESTS AND YET HERE I AM WRITING FOR A MAN I'VE KNOWN FOR NO MORE THAN A WEEK OR SO. Media is ruining my chances at a normal relationship fr ANYWAY ENJOY

Listen this fucker is the definition of disney Prince when he gets comfortable enough around you

Everytime he talks about his s/o instead of saying you're his he says that he's yours

He feels like it's not as intimate and accurate as he really feels around you to say that you're his

And BTW he brags about you and your public displays of affection to everyone and anyone

Bro has not an ounce of embarrassment in showing he loves you and you love him

He's so charming and smooth but with that sprinkle of awkwardness that makes him ridiculously adorable

He is quite literally a gentleman and worships the ground you walk

In general he's very respectful and lovely with everyone

That's why he tends to like make people crush on him

Which he totally doesn't notice like ever, this man can and will think they're just being overly nice out of pity

He is literally so good at dancing, like it's almost annoying

One could think that him being so tall would make him really stiff and awkward when dancing but he's not

He's as graceful and elegant as ever

Is the only time he gets confident and shows off a little bit his physical appearance

He definitely prefers more elegant dances like waltz and tango ecc

JUST IMAGINE, JUST IMAGINE WHAT DANCE THE TANGO WITH KÖNIG WOULD DO TO YOU.

He has a really hard time at being funny cause he always worries that maybe his jokes are not obvious enough or that he's just straight up not funny

Like he has a shit ton of puns and jokes in his head but says none of them cause he doesn't really knows if people will get it and it's scared of coming off as weird

Most of the jokes are dirty jokes BTW, this man is an absolute child and is making deez nuts jokes left to right inside the confines of his really strange mind

Has really large hands, like not quite big but really long fingers and they're slightly crooked AND EVERYONE WHO HAS LONG FINGERS CAN CONFIRM YOUR FINGIES GET CROOKED

ALSO ALSO when he buys a new phone he doesn't even cares about it being good or not

BRO BUYS THE BIGGEST FUCKING PHONE EVER. HE HATES SMALL PHONES WITH ALL HIS SOUL

He has premature grey hairs. Like he has starting to get them when he was really young

Which ends up in him always having to dye his hair

He loves to go to get groceries

Like he actively gets excited about new products or new things to buy and overall he just enjoys how relaxing and calming is to go to the supermarket

I feel like he's one of those people who are really good at card games like poker ecc

He either ends up broke af cause everyone is merciless with him or he's unbelievably lucky and ends up winning every hand but doesn't takes the money cause he feels bad

It really depends on the day

With board games tho he's definitely a sore loser

Like have you seen how pissy and sarcastic he gets in the game sometimes? You can not tell me this man doesn't hates losing at monopoly

Me and my fellow könig simp @bloodlst have come to the conclusion that he has an involuntary resting bitch face

The fact is that as I said before he clenched his jaw almost always due to anxiety which makes him look like really scary but insanely hot

The moment you make him smile tho it's like you're witnessing some sort of shapeshift witchery

HE HAS THE KINDEST SMILE EVER

He has gone through the most traumatising injuries ever but never seems to notice (?)

Like he has big ass scars in his body and when someone asks about them he tells the story all chill as if he's not talking about him getting fucked up in every possible way

and he like never realises how serious his injuries are in the eyes of everyone else so he's always so confuse as why everyone looks so concern

He chooses his words wisely cause he values the meaning of certain words and doesn't likes to use them lightly

Like he tries not to tell his s/o I love you too lightly or too much cause he wants the phrase to always feels as special as it is for him and not something you said just because

And about that when he's arguing with someone he never says anything he does not mean

That means he will say 100% the truth even if it hurts

That doesn't mean that if he realises he's wrong he won't apologise

He will and will genuinely own his mistakes and take responsibility without using excuses

Like I said before könig is not one who gets angry easily

He has unwavering patience and deals with things very rationally

Like he is used to people treating him as if he was dumb, bullying him and just overall making him feel like bad about his anxiety or himself so it's not surprising he can handle people bring arses very well

He gets upset but always hides it really well

When he does gets mad tho he is going to make you cry

Any filter or shyness goes away and he just snaps and gets really mean really fast

Mean because although he's being honest, he's particularly brutal about it and says things as harsh as possible

But like I said is really hard for him to get that angry

The most that one can do to him is force him to politely excuse himself to go somewhere else and cry it out

He's a really sensitive person and most often than not he just gets sad, he won't stay sad for long but when he does he feels like absolute shit

The things that make him go absolutely apeshit is mostly when people mistreat his loved ones or when people take advantage of someone weaker than them like they used to do with him

When he was younger he used to have a lot of anger issues

He used to feel frustrated all the time with how unfair everyone was with him because of his anxiety

Never got into physical fights but would end up snapping and saying really hurtful things to people he loved

That's why now he tries to be careful with words

He's very proud of the person he has become in some way

He has come a long way and now he's a healthier person than he used to be

He forgives but never forgets even tho he's not the type of person to use past mistakes against someone

He just keeps in mind the thing that had happened and if he doesn't sees any change then he just acts consequently

Hates mint flavour beverages or ice cream and can't understand why people enjoy it so much

I don't know why but I feel like he grow up with his grandparents

He absolutely loved his grandma and used to call her almost everyday

When he buys clothes he doesn't really care about the brand ecc he likes to buys what makes him feel confident or good

Not even what others might like or stuff like that nono

He just buys whatever his funky brain finds pretty

And surprisingly it leads to him having a really good style

#könig cod headcanons #könig #könig cod #könig cod mw2 #könig x reader #codmw2 #cod #cod mw2 #call of duty mw2 #call of duty modern warfare 2 #call of duty

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sevensoulmates · 2 months

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Buddie 7x04 Meta Part 2 (of 4)

Click here for Part 1, Part 3, and Part 4.

Where I left off in Part 1 is that Buck is known for being overly nosey about Eddie's romantic prospects. He does this for Ana a bunch and Marisol too to an extent. But this is the first time that Buck is doing so for a MALE romantic prospect for Eddie.

Even though Buck isn't aware that he's viewing what Eddie and Tommy have to be romantic, the fact that it's written and directed almost EXACTLY how Buck's been about Eddie's other girlfriends speaks volumes. The only added layer here is that instead of being "enthused" for Eddie, he's hostile and upset about it. The new layer here is that Tommy is a man. This once again goes back to Buck viewing only women as romantic prospects for both of them, and placing himself firmly in the best friend category because that's the only place he believes he CAN be (at the moment).

This also marks the first of several callbacks to Eddie's streetfighting arc in season 3 (specifically the famous 3x09 "I could take you" kitchen scene) which was inherently intertwined with what Buck views as one of the biggest mistakes of his life: suing the department, breaking Eddie's trust, and being forced to be away from Eddie and Christopher for an extended period of time.

Last time he and Eddie talked about "throwing punches" Buck said "you ever stop to think that maybe you were throwing punches at the wrong guy?" which is fucking HILARIOUS to me because it has SEVERAL huge connections to this episode. 1.) Eddie dating "the wrong guy" aka Tommy instead of Buck, 2.) Punching/fighting/physical violence as a metaphor for "socially acceptable" M/M intimate touch and 3.) BUCK misassigns his romantic feelings to Tommy aka "the wrong guy" at the end instead of realizing that Eddie is the core of his desire in this episode.

Where's my "Tommy is Eddie in a different font" counter? It is now textual that the writers WANT us to take SPECIFIC notice that Buck views Tommy to be extremely similar to Eddie. And the main thing other than the army that he points out that they have in common is "they both like watching half-naked men pummel each other". This is just pointedly saying Buck thinks both of them are into/attracted to men. Like, is there any other way for this to be interpreted? (It could also be seen as mild internalized homophobia.) Maybe Buck doesn't realize that's what he's saying, but that's what he's saying. Which is once again assigning queerness specifically to Eddie (like in 7x01) even though Buck is the only one of the two who textually experiences MM queerness in this episode.

This line also draws attention to the fact that Buck is jealous because Eddie and Tommy are together in a homoerotic atmosphere. He may even be (unconsciously) thinking about Eddie and Tommy half-naked pummeling each other and no he doesn't find it hot. And this is proven by Eddie confirming that he and Tommy have pummeled each other in Muy Thai. Buck could be thinking of this as him being uncomfortable because he wants to be homoerotic with Tommy, but no, once again the focus of this scene is Eddie. Eddie continues to be the object of his desire.

((Running tab on Tommy's similarities to Eddie: badass, competent, helicopters, army, Eddie-coined phrase, both like watching fights AND fighting together, both like cars, both are attracted to men ))

This line is yet another callback to the famous kitchen scene in 3x09. Buck homoerotically said "he could still take Eddie [in a fight]" and "you wanna go for the title?" implying they'd wrestle. In this instance in 7x04, just like it was in 3x09 wrestling is a (common queer) allegory for gay sex. The kitchen scene in 3x09 was buddie's most sexually charged moment to date. So Tommy being the one here to "go toe-to-toe" with Eddie and "take him" in a fight? Oh buddy boy Buck is PISSED.

This is so funny because Buck clearly doesn't believe his own words here. But it's true in the past. Buck doesn't mind when Eddie makes friends. He was cool with Eddie making friends at the dispatch center, and he was also cool with Eddie going to play basketball with friends excluding him for a LONG TIME prior to now. He was also chill with Eddie being friends with Felisa, and even Marisol. Something has changed now, and I believe that Buck's belief of only being able to be close to Eddie as his "special friend" is changing. He's subconsciously realizing that he could be closer to Eddie than just a friend. But someone else is coming in and swooping Eddie up right out from under him. This entire episode is Buck (unconsciously) panicking over possibly missing his chance of being romantic with Eddie. That's the layer he doesn't realize. Buck DOESN'T usually mind Eddie making new friends, and he even says it again at the end of the episode that he knows Eddie's allowed to have other friends, but he does mind when said "friends" could ruin Buck's chances of being with Eddie before he even realizes he HAS a chance.

This is the first of many callbacks to 2x01 in this episode (but not the first this season, 7x01 was absolutely riddled with callbacks to 2x01). Eddie is thinking about how it feels to "click" with someone and canonically this has only happened to Eddie before with two people: Shannon and Buck. This is also a callback to 6x17 Love Is In The Air where Eddie says he wants "chemistry" and "magic" with someone. And clearly, Buck sees that Eddie has chemistry and magic with Tommy--far more than he has with Marisol. But the most recent time Eddie has clicked so strongly with someone was with Buck, and that's obviously what Buck's thinking about here. Because Buck also remembers what it was like to click with Eddie.

Who else is Buck supposed to be thinking about in this scene? Abby? Natalia? Ali? No, no, and no. He's thinking about Eddie and how they clicked (not immediately) but very soon after meeting in 2x01. And they developed an extremely close bond that's been growing deeper and deeper with each year that passes. And Buck thinks he may lose that special bond with Eddie because now Eddie's developing something (possibly BETTER) with Tommy.

Once again Buck using the same phrasing here as he does with Eddie's previous female love interests. This is how he's asked after Ana in the past. And when Eddie mentions trivia and karaoke, these two things made me think of Madney, another famous pair in the show who DID NOT REALIZE (or want to admit) THEY WERE DATING until someone else pointed it out to them. Sound familiar?

Again, I want us all to give Eddie some grace here. In the past, Buck has been more than happy to watch Chris while Eddie goes out on dates. There's even a famous date where Eddie goes out with Ana and Buck watches Christopher for him "you're a miracle worker". But this time, Buck is unhappy about it. Why? Because he wants to be involved in whatever Eddie's got going on with Tommy, because previously those kinds of things were reserved for Buck (or Buck + Chris together). BUT how is Eddie supposed to know that Buck would feel hurt by it this time? He's never been mad in the past when he asked Buck to watch Chris?

I giggled. Eddie's regulated Marisol to a glorified babysitter. He'd rather go out and date Tommy than spend any time with Marisol and it's so funny. And of course, the implication that Eddie's already had been out two times with Tommy in the little time they've become friends, enough to ask Marisol multiple times to watch Chris while Eddie goes out, something that used to be Buck's job. But to Buck, it's never felt like "babysitting" it feels like spending time with his son.

This scene does something else that makes it indisputable that this episode is not about Buck wanting Tommy. The Christopher layer. Christopher is an extension of Eddie, but at the same time, he's also a little boy that Buck loves separately from Eddie. Buck views him as a son, and he reacts to Christopher finding Tommy cool the same way a parent would react when their kid finds someone else cooler than them. This is in fact the same reaction Michael had to Harry finding Bobby cool in 2x14 Broken. Because now Tommy's not just threatening Buck's place with Eddie, but Buck's place with Christopher too. If the object of Buck's jealousy was Tommy in this instance, why would Buck be threatened by Christopher? It doesn't make any sense.

Buck's aware that Christopher is not the one bringing Tommy in, Eddie is. And he's afraid that if Christopher likes Tommy more than him, Chris will want Tommy as another parent, not Buck. All of this stuff with Christopher has absolutely no romantic underlining, it's all parental. Therefore there's no way this scene can be read as Buck jealous because he wants Tommy for himself.

Additionally, Buck being a parent to Christopher alongside Eddie is one of the few big things that sets Buck apart from just being a "regular" friend to Eddie. Co-parenting with Eddie is one of the most intimate things they do together in their relationship. Losing Christopher as a son means losing Eddie as a co-parent, and again the object of desire here is Eddie.

Another point to this is that Buck gets actively angry at Tommy in this scene. He thinks that Tommy is lying to Christopher's face in order to gain favor with Chris, which gains favor with Eddie. He's basically accusing Tommy of being inauthentic and using phony means to get in with Chris and Eddie. And the kicker is that it's over such a trivial thing too! I swear to you Buck does not really care about which Star Wars movie is superior. He's trying to find something, anything, to indicate that Tommy isn't who he seems to be, that Tommy is using Chris to get to Eddie, that Tommy isn't a good person and therefore should not be the one that Eddie (and Chris) wants. Why on earth would Buck be searching for any little excuse to make Tommy look like a not-great person if Buck really secretly wants Tommy for himself? He wants Eddie and Chris to see that Buck is the "superior" option, and to choose him over Tommy. He doesn't want them to see that Tommy's a sucky person so then they'll dump him and let Buck have him. That doesn't. Make. Sense.

And these lines prove that yes, it was not Christopher going on and on about Tommy but Buck questioning him and Chris just answering truthfully. This is also unprecedented because (as far as we know) Buck's never questioned Christopher about any of Eddie's other friends or girlfriends.

Not to mention this scene parallels Maddie's "does this mean this boycrush on Eddie means you're finally getting over Abby?" It's another instance of Maddie being the voice of truth during one of Buck's many info-dumps about Eddie and Chris over the years. But it's also interesting because this shows Maddie hitting the nail on the head when it comes to this aspect of Buck's problem, and she'll have one more scene with him later in this episode where I actually think she misunderstands the underlying truth, but Buck takes it as fact cuz that's his big sis and she's always right. I'll get to that later.

This line proves that this is not something that Eddie's been doing alone and never wanted Buck to be a part of. It's not like Eddie specifically invited Tommy because he wants to do this specific thing with Tommy. Eddie has invited Buck on MORE THAN ONE OCCASION to play basketball with him, and Buck says no because he's not interested in basketball. Which is a totally fine thing to do if a hobby is not your thing. But it implies that Eddie has wanted to and has actively tried to share this thing with Buck in the past, but Buck has just never taken him up on it. But now that Tommy's involved, Buck's suddenly interested? We also get to see a short moment of Chimney expressing interest in Tommy and thinking he's "so cool" as well, but does Buck really react or care at all that Chimney thinks Tommy's cool? No. Not at all.

And before I get into the next set of scenes, here is where I want to draw attention to something Tim Minear said in an interview about wanting Buck to meet and get integrated with Tommy but through someone in the 118. He didn't just want it to be something where Buck is isolated with Tommy like he's been with nearly all his past girlfriends. But here's the kicker and why I will call Tim on his bullshit. He had THREE OTHER ESTABLISHED CHARACTERS who all know Tommy WAY better than Eddie. Eddie is actually the character that makes THE LEAST SENSE to be Buck's introduction to Tommy as a person. If the writers wanted this episode to be PURELY focused on how Buck is into Tommy but doesn't realize this, they could've had Chimney be the middleman. Chimney could've invited Buck to hang out with him and Tommy, Buck could've gone to basketball to impress Tommy, could've tried to show off with basketball, could've tried to impress Chim on a call to get him to tell Tommy how cool Buck is. But nope.

Or Hen could've been the person to bring Tommy in. We could've seen scenes of Hen and Tommy, showing a bit more of Tommy as an individual, making amends with her. She's also the only openly queer member of the 118 at the moment. She also could've been a POV character to point out Buck's queer attraction to Tommy. They could've openly discussed Tommy's queerness in a much more straightforward way, maybe even have Hen empathize with Tommy (possibly) being closeted when they worked together. If anything, making Tommy make amends and show himself to have grown as a person would've endeared him to the audience of long-term viewers (many of whom don't like Tommy due to his past actions) FAR MORE than what actually happened in the episode. It could've been a great way to integrate Tommy into the core firefam. But nope. That's not the story the writers want to tell.

With Bobby, he makes the least amount of sense of the three, but he still knows Tommy better than Eddie. You could've gotten the same "Buck thinks he's jealous but it's not because he thinks he's losing a friend but because he's into Tommy" story if you used Chim or Hen, but Buck is not in love with either of them. So why is Eddie the one bringing Tommy into the fold if not to provide a clear direction for where Buck's queerness will lead him down the road?

Alright, I'm gonna stop here for part 2 cuz tumblr is once again saying I have too many pictures. Got to part 3 for more.

Part 1, Part 3, Part 4

#911 abc #buddie #911 meta #buddie meta #bucktommy #evan buckley x eddie diaz #buck x eddie #911 speculation #buddie speculation

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