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deathsbestgirl · 7 months

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Please talk more about how not fine Dana Scully is, people really tend to underestimate how fucked up she truly is, honestly the way she manages to hold onto her kindness and integrity through so much violation is kind of miraculous

sometimes it makes me a little crazy. like, dana scully was so light in season one. she smiled and laughed a lot, she teased mulder, she loved working on the x files with mulder and it was obvious. even on the days she would get frustrated with mulder for doing something crazy. and i think that's true throughout the show, until the later years where it meant losing mulder, giving up her child, going on the run...

but. for me, a change occurs in beyond the sea. probably more for the audience than scully or mulder.

scully sees her dad's ghost before she even learns he's gone. she had her parents over for dinner and wanted him to be interested in her work, instead of being disappointed with her career choice. he only asks how it's going right before they walk out the door, and then he's gone. part of her wants to believe she really saw him, but it's also really scary. she almost looks for x files with similar happenings but as she finds them, slams the door instead.

she buries herself in the case as soon as the services are over. she believes boggs as mulder nearly begs her not to. when mulder is shot, she loses it on boggs. and in the end, she tells mulder she's afraid to believe.

scully was afraid to believe before she was abducted. after her abduction, believing is more terrifying. she clings to skepticism and focuses on proof. in their line of work, only what you can prove really matters. it's what mulder needs her for, and later on, she clings to it harder even though she can't deny there are certain fantastic things she believes in.

after her abduction, everything is heavier for both mulder and scully. we saw how lost he was in 3, how self punishing & self hating. and when scully comes back, she's determined to get back to work. she won't take any time before heading back because that would mean sitting alone with what happened to her and she can't possibly deal with that. fear of the unknown to the extreme.

scully never believed samantha was taken by aliens. then she was taken like her, returned completely battered an inch from death with no memory of what happened. whether that was the work of whoever (or whatever) took her or her own mind...either thought is terrifying.

in firewalker, mulder is so cautious with scully. he can't bear her disappearing on him again. he tries to keep her safe and it ultimately puts in a dangerous position. but she's quick, and she saves herself while the girl handcuffed to her dies on the other side of the door.

mulder was so gentle with her after her father died, calling her dana for the first time that we see. he does it again in lazarus when jack willis/dupre kidnapped her. he's careful with her feelings whenever she's vulnerable. after her abduction, in firewalker, when he finds her alive, he cups her cheek like he did in beyond the sea. she is so precious to him, they're best friends. and she tells him she's fine over and over again.

in irresistible, the case already disturned scully on a core level. she couldn't comprehend the violence and violation of what donnie pfaster did to the dead, and later his victims. as a pathologist, she can't imagine desecrating a body. what she does, she does because she cares about people and justice. she can't save them when they're already gone, but she can find the truth and honor them.

in season two when they're separated and she's teaching again, she goes on about the man lying dead in front of her.

"what this man imagined...his dreams, who he loved, saw, heard, remembered...what he feared...somehow it's all locked inside this small mass of tissue and fluid."

and her student calls her spooky.

although scully doesn't love people the way mulder does -- untethered, unchecked -- she loves humanity & her country, and she wanted to do something important with her life. she decided in squeeze to be on the victims' side, like mulder. with mulder.

all through irresistible she is so disturbed and trying to be strong and hide her feelings from mulder, so she goes back to d.c. for a therapy session & to get them some leads. and then as soon as she comes back to work the case with mulder, donnie pfaster makes her a victim again. so shortly after her abduction and almost dying in firewalker. karen kosseff tells her how vulnerable she was, and it's like it almost doesn't seem real. because she doesn't remember, she healed, and if it weren't for the missing time & everyone around her having lived those horrible months without her, it would be like it didn't happen.

she fought like hell against pfaster. injured from a car accident, bound & gagged, in a house she didn't know. hallucinating him as other evil men & the devil. she was spiraling and she only had herself to depend on in the moment. hoping that mulder & co would find her in time. but ... the man worked quickly.

she didn't seem too affected after lazarus, but she believed it was her friend and that he was sick. after her abduction, she didn't have anything to cling to. after pfaster, she had mulder and she only leaned on him when she was completely overwhelmed & he wouldn't let her deal with it alone.

she has new fears.

she loses her sister and mulder loses his dad. both murdered by the same people. aliens or the shadow government, when they decide scully is a problem they have her abducted or attempt to have her killed. and she can't really do anything to prevent it when she has no idea what or who she needs to protect herself from.

there are a few moments that really stick out for me, that i just think it's clear she's not okay. scully bottles things up and keeps her pain close. she doesn't unleash it, does her best to hide it & bear it alone.

but in piper maru, skinner tells her they're letting melissa's case go inactive. cold. she's opened her eyes to government conspiracies. and she flat out tells skinner "if i may say so, sir, it has everything to do with interest. just not yours, and not mine."

there's no reason they couldn't solve her sister's murder. they have the weapon, and like scully says, they can catch people with much less. and then she goes down to the basement office where mulder is working on a case. he's going through everything, actually doing some normal pre-investigation things. and he won't ignore what's going on when so many men have suffered and may well die, just because the government is trying to sweep it under the rug.

and scully loves him so much for this.

(side note: i always love when mulder does this. it's like "do you think i'm spooky?" he wants her to think of him as well as he thinks of her. they're best friends. it matters to him what scully thinks of him. a rarity.)

then there's wetwired. scully watches all the tapes they find and very quickly becomes paranoid about mulder, specifically. now, i don't think she really believes it, i think it's a thought that scares her when she's at her lowest. but she was assigned to the x files to debunk his work, he gets neck deep in alien & government conspiracies. she didn't always understand the specific dangers of their particular work. she's so ashamed when she's back to herself, and mulder doesn't blame her at all. and when she starts talking about what she remembers, mulder takes her so seriously. mulder believes she saw something, but like the others, she misinterpreted what she saw because of the heightened paranoia & anxiety. one woman thought she saw her husband cheating with a blonde, and it was her neighbor with his golden retriever. so it's very possible she did see someone having a meeting with the cigarette smoking man outside their motel, or at least someone involved with their case.

scully is always afraid to be taken again, to be murdered. she knows the smoking man has something to do with all of it. she knows she stayed because of mulder. and she will continue to work on the x files with him. because it isn't just about him anymore. she needs answers too.

and then there's the cancer arc. i wrote all about memento mori already, and i think that all says a lot. but then there's gethsemane. kritchsgau told scully the shadow men gave her cancer to make mulder believe. it guts her, it almost kills him, but they know where her cancer came from and they haven't been able to do anything about it. i can't get over the way her voice cracks in redux. mulder is waiting for her in darkened bedroom and tells her that everything goes back to the fbi. her abduction, her cancer. she wasn't ready to face where her cancer came from, and mulder tries to help her. and any time she almost has a grip, another thing makes it come crashing down around her. the men who had her abducted, her sister killed, gave her cancer being part of the same institution she is...that's unbearable.

scully grew up with a father in the navy. they love their country, they trust their government & military & law enforcement. the x files turns everything she's ever known and understood about the world upside down.

and then there's seasons 8-11. i don't have anything to say except: scully is NOT okay. she gave up her son and has never forgiven herself. she thinks about william everyday and prays he's safe, that she did the right thing. as if there even was a right thing. you never see a more raw or vulnerable scully than in the revival. and if mulder wasn't there holding her together and doing what she couldn't...i don't think there would be a scully.

#i can talk more about s8&9 + the revival #but like. scully is just never the same after her abduction #her light becomes something very different #mulder and scully are always the light in dark places #but mostly they're each other's light in their suffocating darkness #dana scully #the x files #txf txt #beyond the sea #lazarus #little green men #piper maru #cancer arc #gethsemane #reduxes #mulder and scully #fox mulder #also i got lazy and did not look for scripts or even transcripts #this is just my brain and i'm so tired l

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butterflydm · 8 months

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wot deeper dive 2x2: strangers and friends

My deeper look at 2x2, without any spoilers from the books. I'll be posting an additional post after this that gets into book-related thoughts.

After we only got a glimpse of Rand in the last episode, we are starting with him right out of the gate. Now, Rand's dreams... Moiraine mentioned in the first season that dreams were important but most of what I have to say about Rand's dreams is probably going to need to go in the post that has spoilers for the books.

2. I can talk about how devastating these dreams must be for Rand. This is his great fear -- that being a male channeler means that he'll kill the people that he loves. That's the whole reason that he's here in Cairhien, why he asked Moiraine to pretend to the others that he's dead. So he has to relive his greatest fear over and over in his dreams now. His hands covered in his friends' blood. Also... I think he's in essentially a mimicry of the outfit that The Man at the Eye of the World was wearing. It's not quite the same outfit, but the white shirt and black coat.

3. Rand is already hearing whispers in his mind, which he'd mentioned at the end of s1 as well -- he said that he could feel the madness coming for him. Even awake, he's hearing whispers.

4. And this is our introduction to Selene. She's aware that he has nightmares, which is probably pretty obvious, to be fair, but I feel like we can be pretty sure that he hasn't mentioned the whispers in his head. He can tell that she's thinking about a morning quickie just from the look in her eyes, but says he has to go to work. There's some teasing about how he's paying for his room & board with sex (which definitely gives me flashbacks to Dana and Mat's intentions there). We don't get a firm answer here on how long they've been sleeping together just "all these nights together".

5. Rand has been in Cairhien (the Foregate, specifically) for long enough that he's formed a routine and a rapport with his neighbors here. He has a coin for the boy that he passes along the way and someone tosses him something to eat without them needing to discuss it first. He's built a little life for himself here, far away from his other friends. We see that he needs a work-pass to enter the walled city (due to being A Poor, I assume) and we also see the richly-dressed people on the streets of the walled city shy away from him and don't want to walk near him. It's such a great setting of the scene and showing what kind of place Cairhien is, with how strict the division is between the wealthy and the poor.

6. The subtitles reveal that what Rand hears in his head as he walks down the hall is "Do you hear me? You are mine, Rand al'Thor."

7. Poor Moiraine looks so deflated and depressed. She was planning to be on her way in secret! Following up on the poem that we still don't know the details of! And now Lan, Verin, Adaleas, and Tomas all know about her plans and are going to tag along. Things are not working out according to her design. I feel like Moiraine has been feeling very helpless recently (ever since she lost the four kiddos while she was injured, honestly -- I'm not sure she ever really recovered her sense of balance after that, because she kept getting surprise after surprise... and then, after she thought she and Rand had succeeded at the Eye of the World, she realized that they failed. AFTER she'd already let Rand leave on his own. She is on a hardcore losing streak and it's depressing for her!) "You're in luck. My sister and I have decided to accompany you," Verin tells her and Moiraine is going, "fuck fuck fuck" in her head. What a delightful scene.

8. Also, regarding Lan -- Moiraine left Lan in 1x8 expecting to die at the Eye of the World. That was her sincere belief when she masked her bond and left with Rand -- she was assuming that she would die there and then maybe Lan would escort Nynaeve and Egwene to the Tower and eventually become Nynaeve's Warder, probably. And if she'd been able to unmask his bond after the events at the Eye, then she might have been able to find her balance with Lan, at least, but she can't sense him any more than he can sense her. And she still believes that the Dragon must face the Dark One and anyone who is at his side is going to die. She is still in 'solo death march' mode. So that's why I don't have any issues with Moiraine's characterization. She shouldn't be doing this to Lan but it feels very in character to me that she is doing it.

9. Oooh, this whole scene with Perrin and the abandoned manor house is very creepy and effective, especially as we build up to them finding the Fade nailed to the door. Perrin worrying that Elyas has "done something" to him to make him experience that moment in the house reminds me of how accusatory Rand got towards Moiraine at the start of last season.

"Useful, to know the difference between vision and reality." Elyas is a man of few words, but they're good ones.

10. So my current guess is that Rand shaved his head because he was getting reactions from people (maybe even specifically from Errol) about how he looked like "an Aielman" and he was trying to mitigate that. It doesn't work fully -- Errol definitely still thinks of Aiel when he sees Rand -- but it helps conceal him.

I love the slow reveal of what's going on with Rand here -- how the relationship with Errol is partly because Rand does like him and want to help him, but he's also learning from him. How Rand's actions make sense in the moment but then are also revealed to have a deeper ulterior motive underneath. He beats up Yann because Yann is an asshole to Errol by deliberately triggering his PTSD... ah, but also because it's going to get him access to Logain, who is held in the more secure areas of the facility. And that moment itself is also used to show us how the whispers are affecting Rand and how he's having a hard time controlling himself. He fears losing himself too. This episode did a really good job showing us both the good of who Rand is but also the negative influences that are working on him.

11. Nynaeve got pulled out of doing chores with all the other novices so that she could get a special lesson from Liandrin. Also, we get the thread of 'crimsonthorn' started here -- it kills in large amounts but dulls the pain when used appropriately. Liandrin steals a bottle here and we'll find out why later in the episode. Nynaeve getting to see some official Aes Sedai healing was very nice though. Liandrin taking Nynaeve under her wing has definitely been fascinating to watch. Also I love this worldbuilding where we find out that the Accepted get to spend time with each of the seven Ajahs to find out where they are best suited. We also find out that Aes Sedai are capable of living "hundred of years", setting us up for the reveal later in the episode.

12. We get more from Mat now! The dynamic between Liandrin and Mat really is fascinating. He doesn't trust or like her, but she's also the only point of human contact that he's been allowed for six long months. We really get to see him acting under adversity here. The miming of the door locking was genuinely delightful. I love how we see that his spirit is not broken by his imprisonment. He's still resourceful and determined.

13. And now we have our introduction to Elayne Trakand, the Daughter-Heir of Andor, who puts her foot in her mouth with Egwene several times by accident. Elayne's little moment of realization that Egwene's room was not "full of rubbish" but was actually Egwene's stuff was really good. I am loving Ceara as Elayne. But Elayne's little realization that she fucked up and then she desperately tries to fix it by complimenting the stitching on Egwene's blanket and then screwing up again when she tells Egwene that Egwene is "her subject" and how she tries to recover from that by sorta flirting with Egwene. She's sweet and awkward and Not Good with people her own age that she wants to be friends with.

14. Alanna and Sheriam's conversation starts out on a tense note when Alanna asks after Sheriam's Warder and Sheriam expresses the feeling that Warders shouldn't be present in private meetings between Sisters, when Ihvon and Maksim are literally right there. We are seeing that there are lots of different relationships that Aes Sedai and their Warders can have! Alanna clearly has no secrets and holds nothing back from Ihvon and Maksim. Lan and Moiraine had a strong queerplatonic bond (that is currently strongly being tested). And Sheriam feels that Warders don't always need to know their Aes Sedai's private conversations. But Ihvon and Maksim feel free to chime in on the conversation between Alanna and Sheriam without holding back.

15. Alanna standing up for Nynaeve not being pushed too early to become Accepted: she's genuinely making so many good points. Interestingly, Sheriam is now echoing the argument that Liandrin made in the last episode -- that Nynaeve's strength in the One Power justifies pushing her harder than you might push other novices.

16. Alanna points out the same thing that she mentioned last season -- that she believes strongly that the Last Battle is coming, and that these powerful channelers are a sign of that. "The Daughter-Heir" gets noted as being a strong channeler alongside Egwene and Nynaeve and the false Dragons Logain and Mazrim Taim. "The Pattern's giving us weapons to fight against Him."

Oof, Sheriam's last little jab at Alanna for 'letting' her Warders attend this meeting with her. "There, you speak as one and not three."

Alanna and co are leaving the Tower to go help Moiraine, on her request. That really does show us that Moiraine considers them genuine friends too, if she's willing to trust Alanna to help her, even after she's been exiled from the Tower.

17. Nynaeve loves tracking people. And this is now the second time when she has tracked someone to their previously-unknown-to-her family (after finding Lan with the other Malkieri in 1x8). I do admit that I was wondering if she was going to discover Mat being held prisoner but I understand (narratively) why it didn't happen.

18. Elyas is not with the others when the Seanchan attack because he doesn't want to sleep indoors. And he tells Perrin that the soldiers are not Perrin's pack.

19. It's also night where Moiraine is, now within sight of the White Tower. We learn that Verin and Adeleas have been working on a history book all these years. Oh, and Verin reveals that she's figured out that Moiraine found the Dragon Reborn and that it's one of the boys that Moiraine left with "last autumn". And we get Verin's philosophy on how to approach the Dragon laid out: she disagrees with the idea that the Dragon should be 'caged' by the Tower and believes that he needs to be left free to act. She believes that the world still has not recovered from the Breaking and that the Dragon is what the world needs in order to be healed and whole, and so she supports Moiraine in "leading him to victory". Moiraine tries to get an oath from Verin and Verin tells her no dice, plus "even oaths have loopholes one can exploit." We gotta work on the honor system.

Verin mentions prophecies found in the Tower that speak of "Toman Head, battles in the sky, a sword of flame and the branded hand that wields it".

20. Ooof, the whispers of "kill him" that Rand is hearing when he attacks Yann, and how he loses control of himself and almost does kill him -- it really does help show how poorly Rand is already doing (I mean, he's been fighting against this for half a year now!). And when he goes back to his room and Selene is waiting for him, she kisses the blood on his knuckles and tells him that "when things get bad, we want to be alone. The truth is, that's when we need each other the most. We can be alone together." And he's clearly still having a hard time controlling himself, but she doesn't seemed fazed by it. Seems kinda into it.

21. Egwene being the experienced novice and then... realizing that Elayne was just trying become friends with her and actually is already pretty familiar with the Tower (I will make a mental note that Elayne has spent the last few summers here... and clearly was getting special treatment while she was visiting). And gets to be present when Elayne gets a harsh setdown from Sheriam for acting like the Daughter-Heir and not a novice. But Egwene, and the viewers, get to see Elayne's loyalty and her integrity here, when she refused to give up the name of the person who allowed her to bring her personal items into the Tower, even when Sheriam makes it clear that she'll face (physical) punishment for her transgression.

22. I love this scene with Liandrin and her... son (?). The reveal, how she reacts to discovering that Nynaeve is watching, how she reacts to Nynaeve trying to give her advice on how to help him, and then her apologies to him afterwards as she admits to him (but not Nynaeve) that Nynaeve was right. Liandrin cannot abide people witnessing her being weak (...which is something she has in common with how Nynaeve has been acting re: her channeling block, I will note) and she defaults to violence when she's upset.

23. Mat discovers that the room next door is an adjoining cell, and one that is already occupied by Min, who we met in episode 1x7 last season. This conversation between the two of them was funny and enjoyable on both sides. But it's an interesting reminder that Mat and Min didn't meet last season, so they are encountering each other as fresh new faces, who are both being held prisoner by Liandrin. It must be such a relief for Mat to talk to someone else after months of only talking to Liandrin. And they have a fun dynamic. Sharing wine.

I love love love that Mat is not interested in finding out his future from Min. "That is way less interesting than I'd expected. I'd hoped for a murder or a secret affair with an Aes Sedai." Also, I wonder if that's refreshing for Min, to be hanging out with someone who is NOT interested in hearing his future from her.

Well, until she does get a viewing off of Mat. And it's him stabbing Rand, who she did appear to genuinely like when they spoke last season ("You seem like a decent person"). And this viewing does also confirm that Min is aware that Rand is still alive (though I don't think she actually knows that his friends all believe he's dead... or that Mat is one of his friends, for that matter).

After some careful considering, I do think that the shirt Rand is wearing is the dark shirt that we've seen him wearing under all the rest of his clothes. Maybe. The dagger does look like it could be The Dagger, maybe.

(I'm just excited to see Mat and "Rand" on-screen at the same time haha)

24. The after-sex conversation between Rand and Selene, where he talks about how he doesn't want to hurt her and she tells him that she's already carrying a broken heart, so nothing can hurt her more than that, and they kinda mutually say that they're both in this for reasons that aren't about being in a relationship -- she wants to remember her past relationship and she can do that with Rand; while he doesn't want to think about his past that he's walked away from.

25. Elayne brews her own alcohol with a weave that she's invented. I love her so much. "I like to tinker with things." She also confesses here that she didn't have any friends growing up. But this whole conversation where Egwene tries to work through her feelings about her imposter syndrome and how being around Nynaeve kinda makes it worse (which is something that we got a hint of in Egwene's deepest fears from Machin Shin last season).

World info: Elayne says that Andor is "the most powerful nation in the world" (to her knowledge, anyway).

26. I do love that now that Nynaeve is going to do the Accepted test, Liandrin is angry at her and kinda doesn't want it to happen anymore but she's accidentally trapped herself into it.

27. Lan discovers and takes the poem (that we still don't know the contents of) and then he tries to have a conversation with Moiraine.

While I liked getting to hear the story of how Moiraine and Lan met earlier in the episode, but I feel like the point that is most significant is here when she talks about when she realized she wanted Lan to be her Warder.

Moiraine: "I couldn't imagine the courage it took to face the Shadow with nothing but a sword."

Also Moiraine: "We were never equals."

(psst, Lan, maybe it's not that she thinks she's better than you. Given that she admits in this scene that she was "wrong about everything". Again, she's still in solo death march mode. She doesn't want Lan to die with her; that's why she left him behind in 1x8 and that's why she's pushing him away now. But it's still painful to hear)

Lan does get to find out here that Rand is alive and Moiraine has hidden it from him because "my loyalty is to [the Dragon] and him alone".

And Moiraine threatens to have Alanna forcibly bond Lan if he doesn't agree to stay behind. "I'll have her take your bond by force, if I must."

28. Almost anything I would have to say about the final Perrin scene is heavy spoilers except: I appreciate how hard they all fight not to be captured here. This is a brutal attack. And then the final attack of the One Power at the end to incapacitate the town.

29. And we get the reveal that these invaders have someone leading them who has a Known Bad Guy as her advisor, which is... not great. And he's clearly thrilled to see that they've managed to capture Perrin.

30. At the very end, Rand's plan comes to fruition when we see that taking Yann (still alive!) out of the picture means that he's getting assigned to take over Yann's position as Logain's caretaker. "I have a feeling you and I have a lot more in common" and Rand can't hide how excited he is to get a chance to talk to Logain. This is, I assume, the original reason that he got the job here -- he found out that this was where Logain was being kept in the city and he has been working his way up to try to become seen as trustworthy and reliable so that he would be able to finally meet Logain in person.

#butterfly watches wot #wot #wheel of time #wot on prime #wot show spoilers #wot prime spoilers #wot s2 spoilers #wheel of time s2 spoilers #wot 2x2 spoilers

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vampirewalterskinner · 2 months

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Can’t remember exactly what ones you’ve already done but A C W and Y for the poly fluff asks? With the ot3 of course🥰🥰

Oooooo this one is tricky. Idk if any of them are more affectionate than the others because they all show affection differently. None of them are verbally affectionate, not typically (I mean, come on, Walter is the sass master and Fox is snarky while Dana is a split second away from turning feral) but they are all very physically affectionate. I think Fox and Dana are tied for overtly physical affection. They like to touch what’s theirs. Feel the people they love under their fingertips. Walter likes the same but I don’t think he’s outwards obvious about it. Not until he can see Fox and Dana need it, or he’s alone with them 🥰

They all have different tactics depending in who they’re comforting!

When Dana is feeling down, there’s nothing she likes more than being held. It’s cannon! Snuggling up with her boys gives her a chance to be vulnerable and makes it easier for her to open up to them. Fox often lays in bed with her while Walter typically holds her in his lap 🥰

I think Fox likes to be babied and cared for 😂 He absolutely loves how Dana immediately holds his face with her hands and asks what’s wrong, what she can do for him. If he doesn’t answer, she’ll just cover his face in kisses until he can’t help but laugh. Walter is more direct. He’s careful, his voice gentle and kind as he asks what’s wrong. He’s always ready to give Fox a hug, in fact, Fox normally initiates it when he’s not in a great mindset. Walter will tease him for it, call him needy or a brat, but he never pushes Fox away. Just combs his fingers through Fox’s hair and pretends he doesn’t hear those little sobs. Sometimes their hugs end with a beer. Other times Walter surprises him with his favorite brand of sunflower seeds.

Walter is very non-communicative. He doesn’t like to show emotional vulnerability. When the relationship first started out, I think it was difficult for Fox and Dana to notice when something was wrong, much less what to do about it. They’re afraid to give him space, worried he won’t feel loved and supported, so they try giving him little gifts here and there. Presents of food and beverages they’ve noticed him consume. A shot in the dark, frankly. It helps, but it’s not enough. When their relationship with him turns physical, however, I think that’s when they finally figure him out. He lets himself go during sex. He relaxes and opens up. It’s also a way for him to vent. A little heavy petting and a hot make-out session later and he’s fine 😂 And if that’s not enough, they lure him into something a bit more…intense 👀💦

They’re all so fucking insecure lmfaoooo 💖 Dana and Walter worry about their appearance like crazy while Fox is terrified the two of them will get tired of him one day. Walter especially, I think, would struggle with their age difference. Not realizing Dana and Fox eat up old men like college students and ramen lmao

I think Fox and Dana win this one 😂 They’re attached to their lovers like parasites (said with love) while Walter is more of a…quiet, long suffering yearner. He misses them every second they’re not by his side BUT he kinda of…forces himself to get over it. I think he does it to prepare himself for if the two ever leave him. Fox and Dana never will, but it’s that little speck of self doubt that keeps Walter from lowering his guard completely.

#the x files #walter skinner #dana scully #fox mulder #ot3: never beating those favoritism allegations #asks

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hyperfixatinglove · 3 months

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adoration + darling with Zeus 💕💖

adoration — how would your f/o speak about you to someone else?

The only person Zeus would even think to speak about me is Dana. He trusts her completely so telling her about me is fathomable to him.

However, Zeus is not chatty guy. He keeps his thoughts close and his feelings closer. He doesn't gush about me without prompts or questions, he can be obvious in how he stares at me for so long Dana lifts her head from her laptop to notice his brother is still staring at me, minutes or hours later.

I'm only saying it's Dana who would ask Zeus if he's in love with me and mention somehow sarcastically how much time he has devoted to looking at me.

Zeus always answers by short, blunt statements, so Dana really has to dig and ask questions until he even starts describing how and what he feels. And her questions can't be vague either or Zeus will just refuse to answer by being silent.

But once those walls are down? Once Dana can get him to talk? He won't stop. He dares not to think what he's saying, out loud, to his own sister, in that moment, which is probably the most vulnerable moment he has had. He just talks, describes how meeting me felt, how desperately he needs me to by his side, how this feeling he's feeling is consuming him from the inside and he doesn't even care. He can't bring himself to care since this is the most alive he has felt since he found Dana.

How horrified he is, of what he is, how he could hurt me so easily, to resist the urge to actually consume me because then I'd be part of him, I'd be him, I'd be with him for eternity like he so desperately desires but to hear the last screams of my existence and agony inside his head for all that eternity? It scares him.

How agonizing it is to be so far from me, to try to keep safe distance because if he spends too much time around me military might get interested again and hunt him down again.

He tells her how he'd tear entire NY apart for me, extinguish the whole USA military for me, he'd be my own personal weapon to manipulate and use if I so wanted.

He fears what Dana will answer so he doesn't stop until he's spoken every thought he has had on me. Well, not every thought as some are spicy.

I think Dana would be shocked, at first. His brother was never chatterbox, so hearing such long monologue from him is already surprising, then add the fact he's basically gushing how deeply and fucked up in love he is must be quite the experience.

Dana does answer gently, but she will tease him.

darling — what outfits would you both wear on a date? feel free to show pics!

I definitely would wear sweater & skirt combo I'm obsessed. Pink or brown sweater paired denim skirt and some cute black boots.

When summer I would instead put on crop top & denim skirt or one of my summer dresses.

Zeus would just rock his normal hoodie & leather jacket with denim jeans combo it's iconic to me & I imagine he's most comfortable in them. He'd switch around the hoodie color from gray, but apart from that no changes.

Summertime I think Zeus would ditch the hoodie, since I would ask him oh so nicely to see him without the hood on. He's not parting with the leather jacket. Otherwise he has the same outfit.

Can Zeus even be cold? Can he even get hot? Prototype story seems to happen in fall or even winter, judging by the leaves on trees being brown & the fact that Alex who Zeus molded himself after is wearing layers like hoodie, leather jacket & shirt do suggest it's cold outside. Zeus clothing isn't real after all so it could be he can't feel or be cold. So most likely he would just do that to please me & blend in with civilians.

#again im sorry for losing the question and just doing Zeus Analysis #letters of love #you consume all of me #not his creator

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angelz-dust · 3 years

Text

masters of none - part 4 (jason todd x reader)

summary: after many months, we are back in action and back in reader’s head. pls enjoy these jason crumbs. if you need a refresher on the plot, the other chapters will be linked below!

word count: 3.7k

warnings: food/eating. alcohol. cursing.

part 1 /// part 2 //// part 3

gravity

ever since i ever felt ya, right there life couldn't seem better. tulip flowers in my sweater. ask me now, is this forever?

…

you rested your chin on the table before you, your arms hanging limply between your knees as you listened to your manager, dana. you were really just watching her mouth open and close while she pointed at a powerpoint. god, what you would've given for an extra hour of sleep. the all nighters in the studio were starting to take a toll.

the feeling of the back of daisy’s soft hands brought you back to earth. the smell of cocoa butter dancing beneath your nostrils as her smooth engagement ring rolled across your cheek. you breathed in her smell, exhaling in content through your nose.

“you good?” she mouthed and you closed your eyes, giving her a little nod. the bassist rubbed her calloused fingers against your forehead, pushing strands of your hair past your hairline. you pouted when she eventually pulled away, leaving you only with the sensation of touch that once was.

you heard tyler shift in his seat and then felt some air graze against your hand. you looked under the table, noticing he was holding something out to you. you two made eye contact briefly before you scooted back in, grabbing what felt like an envelope. looking down at your lap, you saw a sticky note attached to it. jason’s money was what it said. you carefully put the envelope in your jacket pocket, sitting back in your seat now and looking at dana’s powerpoint. she was going over reports from your publicist, jerry, which you didn't particularly care about.

“now, i have to ask,” dana’s words pierced your bubble of inattention. “have you all thought about what i said about this next album?”

jordy raised his hand like a school kid. “yes?”

“y/n and i decided that we'd be okay with making our album a group project. it has been, admittedly, kinda hard and boring without everyone else. we’d honestly be doing ourselves a disservice by not doing it together,” jordy explained, dana clapping her hands together.

“wonderful,” she nodded, keeping her hands clasped. “i know you two were excited to do your own thing, but i was talking to jerry and he was really pressing me to get a group album from you guys. the people wanna see you guys as a unit of established artists, which you all are. so what's the concept? we never discussed it.”

“uh,” you verbally paused, raising your arms above your head to stretch. “disco, jazz, and funk. it's a mix of those.”

“retro is in right now,” dana nodded, pacing around the room. “how far back will this set us on a release date?”

you grimaced, leaning back in your seat, the back of the seat lightly bouncing as it absorbed your weight. you pondered the question for a moment. “if it’s gonna be a group thing, it'll have to be significantly longer. we have a decent starting off point but i'm gonna need way more songs now.”

“what about the rest of you? any tracks that we could swing?” dana asked, looking at the rest of the group.

grabbing a pen and piece of scrap paper, you started jotting down notes as everyone spoke out to you. dex and quinton didn’t have anything, but they wouldn’t be a problem. you just needed to give them a beat to rap over and you’d be set. the twins had a finished song already that fit the concept, which was good. with tyler’s voice and aly’s excellent song writing abilities, you doubted very seriously that anything else needed to be done to it. daisy and hector had plenty of lyricless songs, too. funk and soul was their specialty, after all. misha even had a demo track she was willing to share.

you looked over the notes you had taken, tapping your pen on the table as you hummed to yourself. “this could probably work. we’ll need to go over everything in the studio, though.”

“we should just do it now. no one is doing shit else today, right?” dex asked the group, who all shook their head.

“i have a request,” you raised your finger, looking at dana. “i want gotham to be involved in this project.”

“gotham…” dana repeated slowly, unsure of what you meant. “care to elaborate?”

“music videos directed by student directors from gotham university, commissioning local artists for album art. dancers, actors, musicians, whatever. all of them have to be from gotham. i don't want any of the money we put into this project leaving this city,” you stated firmly, dana giving you a blank look.

“i like that idea,” hector said, giving you a kind smile before turning to dana, shifting in his seat. the drummer was like a big brother, always backing you up in moments like these. “accessibility to the arts is really limited here and we should change that.”

“i’d rather give back to the city, too,” quinton agreed, playing with the gold cross hanging from his neck. “we’re one of the only groups in gotham known outside of gotham. we should use that as an opportunity to rep our city.”

“it sounds like you have your minds made up on this,” dana narrowed her eyes, letting out a sigh. “it would definitely be good PR.”

“because god forbid we do something out of the kindness of our hearts,” misha laughed, rolling her eyes. “we're trying to put the city on and you're worried about how it makes us look.”

“that's my job, misha. don't you want me to do my job?” dana retorted. “besides, i'm more concerned with the funding. you all don't have disposable income, believe it or not.”

“but i know someone who does,” she said with a singsong tone, giving you a look.

“i hope you're not referring to me,” you deadpanned. your income was far from disposable.

“i’m referring to our good friend, bruce wayne,” she explained, grabbing a business card out of her purse, handing it over to dana. “ever since i got invited to that charity gala, i've had a direct line to a representative with the wayne foundation. i say we ask them to help fund the project.”

“now that could work,” dana admitted, eyeing the card as she tapped her foot. “if we pitch for more youth involvement, it'll probably go over better. we all know how much bruce wayne loves saving the children.”

you frowned at how dana described bruce’s initiatives as a philanthropist. you were sure his motivations for favoring youth projects were good intentioned, considering his parents had been killed when he was just a little boy. you wanted to go into this good intentioned, too and you hoped that they'd agree. they being the wayne foundation and subsequently, bruce himself.

“ty and quinton could do something with forrester. if we’re going for the youth involvement route, i mean,” aly spoke up.

“forrester correctional. our old stomping grounds,” quinton sighed wistfully as he patted tyler on the shoulder. “i think that would be a good idea.”

“they use the arts as an outlet for them, so it could be beneficial for everyone,” tyler nodded. “there are a lot of good kids there. just unfortunate circumstances, that’s all.”

“wasn’t one of bruce’s son’s a troublemaker before he was adopted?” aly continued, not noticing the look you and tyler shared. “i’m sure he’d probably be interested in doing something with them if his son comes from the same background.”

“it’s settled, then. you all keep working on the music. jerry and i will handle the rest. we need this album out before hector and daisy’s wedding,” dana said, grabbing her suitcase.

…

hey, i have your money. did you still want it?

you stared down at the unsent message, your thumb floating over the send arrow. you hadn’t spoken to jason since that night after the race, as per his request. your mind kept wandering back to it, even as time still went on. what happened was scary, to say the least. fun, but scary. you wondered how the hell jason didn’t get the two of you killed. that part, you didn't want to think about too hard. everyone in gotham had their secrets and it was an unspoken rule amongst citizens to not pry. secrets were secrets for a reason. nothing good ever came from unearthing them.

speaking of secrets, you hadn't exactly told tyler and quinton what happened that night. not in detail. you conveniently left out the chase and stopping to get something to eat. omitting the first part was obvious, but the second one was for your own sanity. you didn't need them teasing you over nothing. besides, all that mattered was no one was dead or arrested. and for the way the three of you used to get down, that was a win.

you considered texting jason earlier this week, just to check in on him, but you decided against it. he obviously wanted you to text him and you obviously had to do the opposite. his little mind game wasn’t going to work on you. you pressed send, frowning immediately as you did so.

maybe it already had.

“it’s too many people in this bitch,” dex sighed, the cold of the water bottle you had asked him for against your hand bringing you back to reality. blinking, you were suddenly very aware of the chaos surrounding you in the studio as you put your phone back in your pocket. you looked to your left, where jordy was leaning against the wall and scrolling through his phone. to your right was aly, who was scribbling in her songbook in the chair next to you. you remembered you were supposed to be working, too. “we need a new stu.”

“i’m working on it!” hector hollered from inside the booth as he and daisy were setting up equipment and instruments. you glanced up at the glass in front when you heard his voice, accidentally catching the pair share a little kiss. you quickly averted your gaze, smiling to yourself.

“new stu, new view, what it do?” quinton began to freestyle to a beat he was making on the coffee table in front of him. “off 92, posted up with southside crew.”

“okay,” dex laughed, noddinh his head as he was vibing with the beat, making his way out of your line of sight. you heard someone, presumably tyler, join in and add some depth to the beat. it sounded like he was hitting a pencil against a shot glass.

“i got a new boo, but i’m tryna slide with misha, too,” quinton continued, dex adlibbing in the back as quinton lowered his voice to his signature melodic whisper. “on the low, nobody gotta know.”

“would you shut the fuck up?” you heard misha say, followed by a barrage of muffled smacking noises and verbal objections from quinton, who you assumed was on the receiving end of what sounded like an assault by pillow.

laughing to yourself, you leaned your head in aly’s direction, not fully facing her. “pass me the flash drive?” you held your hand out weakly. once you felt the plastic in your palm, you leaned back over and put it into the computer, pulling up the proper files.

“we’re done back here,” daisy smiled at you, she and hector coming out from the booth.

you clapped your hands together. “wonderful. everybody shut up, please.”

you pulled up the twin’s song and let it play, your eyes fixed on the colorful audio loops on the screen. the green ones were tyler’s vocals, the purple were aly’s. it looked like blue was reserved for instruments and red was any added sound effects or layered sounds.

“you two sound really great,” jordy walked up behind aly’s seat, leaning against it as he swayed his head to the beat.

“thanks. i wrote it with our mother in mind,” aly said, the words coming out of her mouth uncomfortably. you placed your hand on hers and gave it a little squeeze, which earned you a look of appreciation.

“it's missing something, though,” tyler scratched the back of his head. “i need the producer squad to give us some assistance.”

“oh, say less,” dex laughed, snapping his fingers to the beat with one hand and holding his glass of hennessy in the other. he danced his way over, taking aly’s seat as she, tyler and jordy moved to give you all some space.

misha sauntered her way over, sitting against the table and flipping her hair over her shoulder. the smell of her sweet perfume floated in the air around you. “i think it just needs some fluffing up. some snapping might work. more vocal layering in certain spots.”

“i agree,” you nodded, dex letting out a satisfied sigh as he took a sip of his cold drink.

“is it good?” misha asked him teasingly and he took his final swig, letting out a more dramatic and drawn out sigh. this time, though, it was on beat with the song. you were pretty sure it was unintentional on his part, since he and misha just shared a laugh before returning their attention to the screen.

after a moment of pondering, you swiveled around in your chair, looking at tyler. “okay, hear me out…”

…

two weeks of very diligent working between the nine of you had given you a lot to work with for the album. all that was left was to start putting things together. you still had a ways to go, but you had a good starting off point. as much as you hated to admit it, it was a good call on dana’s part to have you all do a group album. the fans seemed to be greatly anticipating the release and the work ethic the nine of you shared was incredible. even in that cramped little studio, you all made it work.

you all agreed to take the day off, but you were still working at some capacity. you had just traded one small space for another, working in your walk-in closet/home studio for the day. you still needed said walk-in to function as a closet, so there were still garment bags pushed up into a corner and shoe boxes haphazardly stacked, surrounding your desk that you had shoved in there. there was just enough space for you to move your chair and safely get out without twisting an ankle, a fate you often flirted with in that room.

in the spirit of your day off, you hadn't done anything too difficult. you were just trying to decide what order you wanted the completed songs to go in. it may seem like an insignificant detail, but the order was important. the transitions between songs couldn't be jarring for the listener. everything had to flow together with natural progression. at this point, it didn't matter since you weren't done with the album, but it was just giving you an idea of how to fill the gaps with future songs.

the sound of your growling stomach indicated that it was time to stop for the day. you quickly saved all your work and headed to the kitchen. you popped some leftovers in the microwave and scrolled on twitter while you waited. the microwave beeped at you, so you set your phone back down and grabbed the bowl, mixing up the contents with your fork. the flash of light coming from your phone got your attention. a text notification.

are you home?

oh, so now he wanted to respond? cute.

despite your annoyance with the situation, you quickly responded with a yes and set the phone back down. you leaned against the counter, eating what little food you had in your reheated bowl. you mixed the contents around with your fork, grumbling. stupid jason and his stupid inability to text back. he could have at least had the decency to leave you on read. he probably didn't even have read receipts on. you weren't sure which was worse. tossing your now empty bowl into the sink, you grabbed your phone to read his next message.

i’ll be over soon.

soon was very vague and you wished that you would've demanded an exact time, but that opportunity had passed by the time you thought about it. you busied yourself with tidying up, trying to make your place look presentable. you even lit your new candle, which you found yourself focusing your attention on while you waited for him to show up. staring at the flame was much more entrancing than you anticipated.

you heard the door buzzer go off. you weren't expecting anyone else, so it had to be him. you leaned against the wall, pressing your finger to the button.

“who goes there?” you presented the question as a joke, but your tone was a little flat.

“it’s the irs,” jason’s voice came through and you buzzed him in.

not too long after, you heard him knock on the door. you cracked it open and the first thing you noticed was his cologne. it was a strong but pleasant scent. spicy and sweet. it was very intoxicating, actually. so much so that you almost forgot you were angry at him.

“hi.”

“hello.”

you opened the door fully and handed the envelope to him. jason eyed it suspiciously. he opened it up and began to count it out in front of you. he made an effort to do it very slow, the sound of the crisp dollars echoing in the quiet hall. his eyes stayed glued to yours as he counted out loud. you leaned against the doorframe as you watched.

“six… seven… eight,” he said, pulling out his wallet and stuffing it with the cash. “thought you would've skimmed some off the top.”

“i should have with how long you made me wait,” you said matter of factly, letting your annoyance be known now.

“i know. i’m sorry,” he sounded honest but you couldn't see it in his face or in his eyes, which was worrisome. it was a nice alternative to listening to a sputter of excuses, though. “let me make it up to you?”

“how do you plan on doing that?”

“i’m so glad you asked,” he smiled. “as it turns out, i've recently come into some money. let me spend it on you?”

“so you like throwing money at your problems?” you asked him. well, you weren't really asking. it was more like you were telling him.

“no,” he said, sounding a little offended. “i just thought-”

“you just thought that throwing money at me would make me forget about the fact that you ignored me for a month.”

“no, no,” he shook his head, sighing in frustration. “listen, i-”

“i really don't wanna hear it,” you said honestly, watching as his frustrated look turned into kicked puppy. you almost felt bad. “i don't like feeling stupid, jason. that's how i feel right now. i want you to make it up to me but you'll have to be a bit more creative than this.”

“you want me to make it up to you?” jason had repeated, confusion on his face.

you poked him harshly in the chest. “you do that or you leave me alone. those are your options. goodbye.”

you shut the door in his face and let out the breath you were holding in. you weren’t sure how jason was going to react to your little ultimatum, but those were your terms. you liked him but you weren’t going to stress over someone you barely knew, especially with your assumptions about him floating around in your head.

“i’ll be right back,” you heard him say through the door, catching you off guard.

“what?”

“don’t go anywhere.”

you didn’t respond but you heard his footsteps getting quieter as he walked down the hall. the elevator ding indicated that he had left. you stood there, confused as to what it was he was trying to do. you were still stewing in your negative emotions, so you went and busied yourself again. you decided the dishes needed washing and got on it right away. in the middle of scrubbing the stubborn sauce stains out of your plate, you heard your door buzzer go off again.

so he did come back after all. interesting.

you buzzed him in like you did before and waited by the door for him. he knocked and when you opened it, you were met with two gifts: a bouquet of pink tulips and a small box of something from the bakery around the corner.

“i shouldn’t have ignored you. it was rude and stupid and i’m sorry. it won’t happen again,” he said to you, holding out the items to you. you hesitantly accepted them, taking the opportunity to look through the plastic opening of the box to see chocolate covered strawberries.

“it better not happen again,” you pouted, looking up at him. you had to appreciate the effort he put in at such short notice. it was a sweet gesture and he actually looked sorry this time.

“it won’t,” he assured you and you smiled.

“i forgive you. but you’re on thin fucking ice,” you reminded him and he grinned at you with a nod.

“i’m going to make it up to you. just you wait,” he said confidently. “not all of us are naturally creative like you, though. you gotta give me some time to think of something else.”

“seems like you’re getting your feet wet with the flower selection,” you noted, taking a whiff of the delicate and fresh scent. they’d look nice on your coffee table.

“lady at the shop said they would convey my sincerest apologies,” he explained, a hopeful look in his eyes. “did it work?”

“for now,” you shrugged, setting the items down on the table next to the door.

“i can accept that.”

“you’re gonna have to because that’s all i’m giving you,” you said firmly. his charm wasn’t going to get him out of this one. not completely. “now go away. i want to eat my berries in peace.”

“i’ll text you as soon as i get the chance,” he told you as you were shutting the door. you peered at him, narrowing your eyes before shutting it again. “i’m serious!”

“goodbye, jason!” you said through the door. you heard his faint farewell as you walked away, plopping on the couch with your dessert in hand.

were you still a little mad at him? yes. but you weren’t going to pass up free stuff, even if you had made all that fuss about the money earlier. at least the gifts had some thought behind them. so long as he held up his end of the deal, you had a feeling being friends with jason wouldn’t be that bad.

hopefully, anyway.

#jason todd x reader #red hood x reader #dc x reader #jason todd #red hood

68 notes · View notes

twdeadfanfic · 3 years

Text

Feral Pt.3

Daryl Dixon x OC

Summary: Daryl is on a run with Rick when, in a warehouse, they find a woman who attacks them, and who reminds Daryl to a lioness…or a feral cat, and who doesn’t seem to trust anyone, including them, but Daryl finds himself going back to the warehouse, trying to get that feral to go with him to the prison, and to earn her trust.

Chapter 3/10 Words: 4600

You can find my other fics in my masterlist.

Last chapter...Daryl convinced Dana, the feral cat, to go back with him to the prison, though she’s mistrustful of the place and the people, seeming to only trust Daryl.

“Cat?” Daryl called for Dana at the outside of her cell. “Brought you breakfast.”

He had brought her dinner last night too, knowing that she wouldn’t want to go eat with everyone else. He had asked just in case, but Dana hadn’t said anything, and when he’d also told her that he could take her to their doctor to check her, Dana had shook her head, and so Daryl had let her be, she didn’t seem hurt despite her old wounds.

Daryl had passed Dana her dinner through the half open door of the cell and then he had sat down at the outside of it with his own dinner in silence, he sill hadn’t wanted to press the woman with questions. It didn’t seem that Dana had minded his presence, though, she had kept the curtain open and sat down at the other side of the door too, looking at him as she ate, studying it almost, and Daryl had tried his best not to feel nervous and self-conscious.

Dana had kept herself in her cell, hadn’t talked to anyone, but Daryl knew that at least, he needed to have her talk to the council today, or else they’d come to talk to her eventually and she might feel more threatened. Besides, she couldn’t be always locked inside a cell.

The curtain of the cell opened, revealing Dana looking at him, and she knotted the curtain to a bar so it wouldn’t fall onto the door again. “Thanks,” she murmured, opening the door a bit and reaching out to take the bowl of oatmeal, and she went to sit down on the unmade bed.

“You don’t wanna get out of the cell? I can show you around, no one will hurt you,” Daryl told her and Dana didn’t say anything. Daryl let out a sigh. “Hey, cat…I’m gonna need you to speak to the council, okay?” Dana looked at him at that. She had seemed more or less at ease with him, but now Daryl could see in her eyes again that suspicion and fear. “Don’t worry, you don’t have to be afraid, they’re good people, alright?” He tried to assure her. “They just want to talk to you about this place, how it works, just…I know you ain’t dangerous for us, but they need to know too. We got a lot of people we have to take care of. But you don’t gotta be scared of them. I need you to talk to them, please?”

Dana looked at him, then down, swallowing hard, and then back at him. She took a deep breath and finally nodded.

“Alright, alright, good.” Daryl nodded encouragingly. “I’m gonna talk to them and then I’ll come back for you, okay?” Dana didn’t say anything but her eyes seemed anxious. “You ain’t gonna run away…right?” He asked half-joking, but in truth, he was a bit afraid of it. The woman shook her head in silence. “Okay…you better not, I don’t want you getting into trouble.” If someone saw her running away, they might get the wrong impression. “Don’t worry, kitten, nobody is gonna hurt you.”

“Kitten?” Dana said and Daryl frowned at her.

“What?”

“You said kitten.” She was looking at him in a way that Daryl had never seen before on her, like she was amused, and Daryl realized that the word might have slipped, he hadn’t even realized it, and he blushed up to his ears, feeling like an idiot.

“You ain’t no kitten,” Daryl said, flustered. “Kittens don’t bite like this.” He nodded towards his arm. “Feral cats do.”

“You said it.” Dana shrugged and Daryl somehow felt even more embarrassed.

“I…uh…I’m gonna talk to the council, I’ll come back for you,” he said before rushing away.

After talking to the council, Daryl made his way back to Dana’s cell. He’d tried to convince the others to not overwhelm her with questions, to not ask about herself if she didn’t talk on her own, because he thought something might have happened to her, that she must have been mistreated by someone, and it was obvious that she was still on edge. He thought the others had agreed with him, they didn’t want to scare her or seem threatening, but they had to make sure that she was not a threat for everyone else.

Once he went back for Dana, she had seemed hesitant, but she had taken a deep breath and unlocked the cell, following Daryl, and so now he was guiding her towards the room that the council used for meetings. Suddenly, Beth seemed to come out of nowhere, smiling at them, and Daryl rushed to step in front of Dana.

“Hi! I’m Beth, it’s good to meet you finally, Daryl wouldn’t let us go greet you.” Beth chuckled.

“Beth, let her be,” Daryl warned, but looking back at Dana, she seemed startled but not scared, and Daryl guessed that Beth looked non-threatening enough.

“Alright, alright…” Beth grinned at Dana. “If you are tired of that cell and want to come talk, I’m going to be watching over the kids at the library.” With a last smile, Beth finally walked away.

“Kids?” Dana asked to Daryl, frowning.

“Yeah, we got a few,” Daryl said. “More reasons why we have to be careful when we bring in new people.” Dana nodded at that, understanding, and they kept going, stopping in front of the door of the council. “Are you ready? Don’t be scared, I promise it will be fine.” Dana looked at him and then at the door. Taking a deep breath, she nodded.

Daryl walked in first, making sure to stay slightly in front of Dana. Everyone was sitting down already, and all eyes went to them. “So…” Daryl tried to push past his awkwardness. “You know Rick already, and Carol and Maggie. Those are Glenn, Hershel, our doctor, and Sasha.” And himself…Daryl still didn’t know why they had asked him to be part of the council.

“Welcome, Dana,” Hershel greeted, smiling at Dana, who looked again like she wanted to flee. “You don’t have to be scared of us.”

“I take Daryl has made sure you have everything you need?” Rick asked, giving Daryl a teasing look and Daryl scoffed, but Dana nodded. “Good…you still think that we are going to kill you?” Daryl wanted to kick Rick for being so blunt even if joking, but Dana just shrugged and Rick smiled. “I get it…but you really are safe here, nobody will hurt you.” Dana didn’t say anything and so Rick kept talking. “When I asked you how many people had you killed, you said several, you said for survival and vengeance…”

“Rick…” Daryl warned him, noticing Dana tensing, he’d told them not to ask about that, he was sure that Dana wouldn’t react well to that, and after seeing her old wound and scars, he wouldn’t blame her for not wanting to remember or talk about it.

“I know what’s that, to kill to survive, to stop people trying to hurt you and your people, we don’t like it but we have to do it,” Rick kept going. “It was the same in your case, I guess…can you tell us about it?”

Dana began shaking her head no quick, breathing hard, and before Daryl could say anything, she was rushing outside the room, and Daryl followed her quick.

“Hey, hey, Dana, wait, wait,” he called for her, trying to stop her from running away. She stopped, looking at him, breathing hard, but she looked like she could flee at any moment. “It’s okay, cat, hey, it’s okay,” Daryl tried to reassure her, even if he didn’t know how. “You don’t have to talk about that, it’s okay. They won’t ask again, I promise. I’m sorry they did…come back inside with me, please?” He asked her softly and Dana seemed unsure, scared eyes looking around before looking at him again, swallowing hard. “It’s going to be okay, I promise. Let’s finish this and I’ll take you back to your cell.”

Dana still seemed more than hesitant but finally she took a deep breath and nodded. Before knowing what he was doing, Daryl reached out to squeeze Dana’s shoulder. When he realized it, he thought he might just have scared her more, but even though she flinched a bit at first, she gave him that tiny, brief smile, and she followed him inside the room.

“I’m sorry, Dana, I really didn’t mean to upset you,” Rick said.

“Yeah, well, you did,” Daryl grumbled, glaring at everyone.

“I’m sorry…but we understand, we all have blood in our hands here, from people that threatened us, that wanted to kill us,” Rick kept going. “We didn’t want to do it, but we had to. So we get it, we know how it is, what sometimes you have to do to survive.” Dana was looking down, breathing hard, but then she nodded.

“You are welcome here, I know we still don’t know each other, but we don’t think that you are a threat…and I know you still don’t trust us, we understand that too.” Maggie gave Dana a small, reassuring small. “But once we get to know each other a bit more and you get used to our home…I think you’ll be able to see how good this can be, and if you want to contribute, you are more than welcome, we all need each other to survive, we all have jobs here. “ Maggie explained. “Glenn and I organize runs, and everyone who can fight is welcome to help on those.”

“After watching you fight, I think you could be really useful on those,” Rick said, and Dana just shrugged, looking down. “Sasha is in charge of lookouts, we have schedules for those, also for the doors, also the walls and putting down the walkers behind those, we don’t want them getting too many and throwing down the fences.”

“I’m not sure I trust her putting down walkers next to someone with a pike,” Sasha said…not one to trust people, like Carol, but it annoyed Daryl.

“She ain’t gonna hurt anyone!” He snapped.

“There are also the gardens and orchards,” Maggie said before neither him nor Sasha could say anything else. “Cooking, laundry, cleaning, inventory…and a million other things that I can’t think about now. So if you feel like there’s something specific that you want to do, tell us and we’ll include you in the schedule. But for now, just take it slow as you get used to all these, take your time, and then come to talk to me about it if you want, okay?”

They all looked at Dana, who wasn’t saying anything, but then she nodded at Daryl. “Him?”

“Daryl is our hunter and also goes on runs,” Rick told her.

“With him,” Dana said quietly and Daryl looked at her, wondering if being around him really made her feel more at ease and less threatened. The idea made him feel grateful, and warm, and…weird.

“Daryl hunts alone,” Carol said.

“She can come with me if she wanna.” Daryl shrugged shyly.

“Can you hunt?” Rick asked to Dana who looked down in silence. “Why don’t you help me and my kid at the orchard? More hands are always welcome.” Dana didn’t say anything but looked at Daryl.

“I can take her with me,” Daryl said, couldn’t stop himself with her looking at him like that. “We can patrol the woods near the prison while I hunt, see if there’s people or walkers in the woods or coming, we had already talked about that once, about setting a perimeter around the prison,” he told Rick. “We also can…dunno, collect whatever plants you want now or anything you want from the woods…I’m gonna be out hunting there anyway, so…” He shrugged, saying the first things that came to his mind. “And you are always saying what if I run into walkers alone while hunting, like if I couldn’t put them down by myself,” he scoffed. “So…she can watch my back.”

“He’s always snapping when someone mentions him going outside alone but now he’s going to take the new girl who we don’t know anything about to watch his back,” Sasha murmured and Daryl glared at her, flustered.

“We already have the lookouts to see if something is approaching but…okay.” Rick nodded and Daryl hoped that he could see how Dana felt reluctant to be with someone else, still scared, but maybe soon she’d feel better and then she would decide to work on something else…Daryl wasn’t sure how he felt about it, though. “We have enough walkers coming to push at the fences all the time, if you can see a group of them coming from the woods it’ll be good to know in advance, just don’t go for them yourselves and be careful, alright?”

“You’re always saying the same every time I go out hunting.” Daryl rolled his eyes but in truth, he was grateful that Rick and everyone else cared for him the way they did, it was something that he hadn’t felt before. He did care for them too. “We ain’t gonna jump on a herd by ourselves.”

“Yeah? I don’t know, she looks like she might,” Rick said, but Daryl could see that he was joking and he hoped that Dana could too. “And you aren’t the most sensible person here.” Daryl scoffed, but couldn’t stop his smirk. “Alright…that sounds good to you?” Rick asked to Dana, who nodded in silence.

“As long as you don’t come back without having hunted anything.” Carol shrugged.

“I won’t, you should know it already.” Daryl rolled his eyes.

“It’s settled then.” Rick nodded.

“That’s all?” Daryl asked and Rick nodded. “Alright…we’ll be leaving for hunting and patrol tomorrow, we’re good enough in food for today.”

“Welcome here, Dana, we’ll see you around,” Glenn smiled. “We’ll let you know when we plan a run to see if you want to come.”

“Let us know if you need something,” Maggie added.

Once in her cell, Dana locked the door and went to sit down on the bed, hugging her knees to her chest, and she looked at him in silence, at the other side of the door.

“Are you okay?” He asked her softly, and she shrugged but nodded. “It wasn’t that scary, yeah?” He half-joked. “Those people? I promise they’re good people, they’re my family. You’re one of us too now, you’re gonna be safe here. You don’t have to talk about anything you don’t wanna, alright?” Dana nodded, looking down in silence.

Daryl didn’t know what to do or say and he just looked at her in silence for a while, until he heard footsteps on the corridor.

Looking to the side, Daryl saw Rick approaching, and he rushed to meet him before he reached the cell. “She talked to the council already.”

“I know, I know.” Rick gave him an amused smile. “Beth was right, you’re a guard dog now.” Rick chuckled and Daryl scoffed, looking down shyly.

“Yeah, well, she’s scared and you all ain’t making it better, told you not to ask her…” He grumbled.

“I know, I came to talk to you about that.” Rick nodded. “I’m sorry, I didn’t want to upset, but if there’s a threat, we have to know.”

“She ain’t no threat!”Daryl snapped.

“I know, I don’t think she’s a threat to us, I hope we’re right,” Rick said. “But whoever she killed, if they were from a group, if they’re dangerous and maybe near the warehouse where we found her, we have to now, it’s not that far.”

Daryl hummed, frowning. Rick was right on that, but he didn’t know how to ask Dana. “I don’t know…I think she might have ended them all, of that she comes from far away.” That was the impression he got. “Whoever they were…I think they abused her, tortured her, or something, she’s all marked.” Daryl felt his blood boil at the thought. “You’ve seen her, she’s traumatized and scared.” They couldn’t expect her to just open up and trust them as nothing.

“Yeah…” Rick nodded. “I’m not blind, I know she’s gone through shit. I told you, you did well, getting her to trust you, bringing her here. You’re good at that, at recognizing good people that need help and bringing them to safety.” Rick squeezed his shoulder and Daryl shrugged, looking down shyly, feeling like an idiot when he realized he was getting emotional. “I don’t think it’s good for her that she’s all the time in a cell.”

“Yeah…” Daryl agreed, but he didn’t know how to tell feral cat that.

“Why don’t you show her around, she hasn’t seen anything yet, she doesn’t know anyone. The more she stays hidden, the more intrigued people is going to be,” Rick said. “Show her where’s everything, maybe take her to the yard so she can get some air? She hasn’t left that cell in almost two days.”

“I can try…” Daryl said, unsure of how she was going to take it.

“Okay…also you might consider to stop staying all day sat down outside her cell like a guard dog looking at her, I know you mean well but it’s getting weird,” Rick joked, chuckling, and Daryl scoffed, flustered.

“Don’t you have nothing useful to do besides bothering me?” He grumbled and Rick just chuckled more.

“Not half as fun…but yes, I’m going to get Carl and we’ll be working on the gardens, the tomatoes are looking good, you can bring Dana to see the gardens if she wants to, maybe she’ll like it? I don’t know.”

“I’ll tell her…” Daryl shrugged, he had no idea of what Dana might like, what might make her feel more at ease and trust them and the place.

“Alright, I’ll see you later.”

Rick walked away and Daryl walked back to Dana’s cell, who looked at him when she noticed him. “Hey, cat…why I don’t show you the place? You don’t know it yet,” he told her and Dana didn’t say anything. “You don’t need to see anyone or talk to anyone.” She still didn’t say anything, just looked at him. “Come on, you can’t be all the time in a cell like if we had you captive, yeah?”

Dana shrugged but finally she nodded, and she opened the door of the cell, getting out and walking with him. Daryl decided to show her the inside of the prison before taking her to the yards, and he toured her around awkwardly while he showed her the important places , he’d never showed anyone around before and he felt a bit silly. On her side, Dana seemed to look at everything around her, seeming amazed and still nervous and anxious.

People looked at them, some waved and smiled, but Daryl was glad that nobody approached them to try to speak with Dana if she didn’t approach first, giving her space, though he wondered if she’d go to speak to any of them by her own will at some point, or if she’d just rather keep staying in her cell…Daryl didn’t know how to go about that or help with it.

“And that’s the library.” Daryl pointed at it. “Sometimes the kids are there reading books, or learning stuff…” Honestly, he wasn’t very sure of what they did, some old world homework but he thought that Carol trained them to protect themselves too. They kept walking until Daryl stopped in front of some other rooms. “So, this is the food inventory, if you want to eat something just come here and ask whoever is doing inventory that day, then that’s the kitchen, and we eat there.” He pointed at the big cafeteria room. “Or outside at the yard, depends on the weather. Some people eat together but you don’t have to, I don’t eat here half of the time.” He shrugged. “I think Carol maybe is at the kitchen now, I ain’t sure…”

“She doesn’t like me,” Dana murmured.

“Nah, nah, it ain’t that…she just…she ain’t one to trust easily, yeah, but she will,” Daryl tried to assure her and Dana shrugged.

Next, Daryl took her outside. There were more people there, but most were working on something. A couple was just sat down on the picnic tables, and they waved at them. Daryl waved awkwardly back, still not used to everyone always greeting him and even stopping him to talk to him.

“So…you see those walkers?” He pointed at the fence and the people stabbing walkers through it. “We take shifts to clear them, they push at the fence all the time, and if they’re too many they’ll throw it down, we can’t let walkers get in here,” he explained and Dana nodded. “Once a day, when it’s clearer, Rick takes the pickup and gets all the bodies, takes them to the woods to burn, sometimes I go with him, sometimes Tyreese, he’s Sasha’s brother…”

“Those are all the watchtowers, there’s always someone on them taking watch, we got sniper rifles.” Daryl pointed at them, feeling a bit awkward and stupid, it wasn’t like Dana couldn’t see them by herself. “Sasha’s almost always on one of those.”

“Hates me…” Dana muttered.

“Nah, nah, she doesn’t,” Daryl assured. “Just give her time to trust you.” From the nearer watchtower, Maggie and Glenn waved at them. “Yeah, besides runs, Maggie and Glenn spent a lot of time in the watchtower too…think they use it to be alone away from everyone.” Daryl scoffed, smiling when he noticed Dana’s tiny smirk.

“And those are the gardens and all that, we got a lot of crops,” Daryl explained, and there were also pots with plants everywhere lately. “Hershel was a farmer before, so yeah, that’s good.” Some people were working on the orchard, including Rick and Carl, and Daryl nodded towards them. “That’s Carl, he’s Rick’s kid, he’s a great kid.”

As they kept walking, now towards the gates, one of the doors of a cellblock opened and Beth walked outside carrying Judith, and she smiled and waved at them.

“A baby…” Dana said and Daryl was not surprised that she sounded shocked.

“Yeah, Judith, she’s Rick’s too, she’s wonderful,” Daryl said, unable to stop his smile as she looked at the baby. “See, we got a lot of people here that we gotta protect, that’s why people is suspicious and worried when someone new comes.” Dana nodded, understanding. “They’ll get used to you soon.” He hoped that Dana got used to them too, that she bonded with more people and were happy, though he wasn’t minding to have her around, and he wasn’t looking forward to be replaced, if he was honest, surprisingly or not. “We got animals too, we built them stuff, we got pigs and horses, wanna see them?” Dana nodded eagerly.

“Rider coming!” One of the watchtowers announced before they could go anywhere. “It’s Michonne!”

Dana looked at him, seeming worried, but Daryl couldn’t help his smile. Michonne had been away for a few days by now. “Don’t worry, you don’t have to be scared, she’s Michonne, she’s a good friend,” he explained. “She comes and goes, has been away for a while.”

They could already see her riding the way to the prison, swinging her katana and beheading every walker around her while she rode as if they were nothing. The doors opened for her and she rode towards their makeshift stables.

“Hey, cat, can we go to the stables so I can see Michonne and you can see the horses?” Daryl asked softly. “It’s really okay if you don’t wanna, alright?” Dana looked at down and then at him, nodding. “You sure?” She nodded again. “Alright, thank you.”

Michonne was getting the horse inside the stable when they reached it, and she grinned, looking at him. “Hey!” She greeted, reaching out to hug him, and Daryl still felt awkward and stiff at it, but he was getting used to it, and he hugged her back. “Everything okay here?”

“Yeah, everything good, and you?”

“Okay…I brought some stuff.” Michonne nudged her bag and then rummaged inside. “This is for you.” She handed him an old motorbike magazine and Daryl couldn’t believe that she had found something like that.

“Where you found this?” He said as he went through the pages.

“Old cabin, you should go someday, there was an old bike at the yard,” Michonne explained. “Very old, looked about to fall down into dust, but I thought on you, maybe you could save some pieces? It was all rusty, I don’t know.”

“Yeah, yeah, I can try, thanks.” Daryl smiled, feeling like just riding to that cabin full speed already.

“There’s no rush.” Michonne chuckled as if reading his mind. “I’m telling you, it was about to drop into rusty, broken pieces, nobody is going to take it.” Daryl shrugged, you never knew. Dana had stayed slightly away but not she walked closer, guarded, and stayed behind him as she looked at Michonne. “Hey, who’s that.”

“She’s Dana, she needed help so I brought her here,” Daryl explained.

Michonne looked at Dana, probably noticing the old wounds on her face, the scars, and those distrustful, scared eyed. She looked at Daryl, nodding, before looking at Dana again, giving her a small smile. “Welcome here, Dana, I’m Michonne. You’re going to be fine in here.”

Dana didn’t say anything, and so Daryl spoke. “We were coming to see the horses.”

“Okay, I’m going to greet Rick, I have stuff for him and Carl, are they at the orchard?” Michonne asked and Daryl nodded. “Alright, see you both around.”

“So…” Daryl looked at Dana while Michonne walked away. “Those are our pigs.” He waved at the pen where the pigs were lying and rolling on the mud. “And these are the horses.” Dana walked to them, reaching out to stroke the snout of one and she smiled, really smiled. Daryl couldn’t help his own looking at her.

“Michonne,” Dana said. “Family?”

“Yes, yes, she’s family now.” Daryl nodded. “She’s a good woman, one of the best, you can trust her.”

Dana nodded. “I like her.”

“Yeah?” Daryl smiled, more than glad of it, and Dana nodded. While she kept petting the horse, Daryl kept thinking about something. “Hey, cat…you’re safe here, you’re going to be fine here, but if you don’t wanna be in here all the time, if you really don’t like it…you can go out with Michonne, you’ll have a place to come back and you’ll be safe with Michonne.” Not as safe as inside the prison, not as safe as Daryl’d want, but he didn’t want her to be in there if she didn’t want to.

Dana shook her head, frowning at him. “With you…don’t want me with you?”

“What, no, no, it ain’t that!” Daryl rushed to say. “Just…thought maybe you didn’t want to…I don’t know, to be here…but…yeah, I want…I…” Daryl stumbled over his words, flustered. “We’re going to hunt and patrol together yeah? If you want to, if you don’t wanna it’s okay, really…” He shrugged, looking down bashfully.

“I want to.”

“Okay, okay, good.” Daryl smiled and Dana gave him that tiny, brief half-smile. “Hey, you don’t want to see the gardens? Michonne is going to be there, and Rick too, he was saying something about some tomatoes, wanna check them?” He was still lost about what Dana might like, what she might enjoy in there, but most people seemed to like the gardens. Dana seemed to think it and then she nodded. “Alright, come on then.”

I don’t know about you, but I think they’re pretty cute.

Thanks to the people who decided to give this story a chance, your support keeps me posting. If you enjoyed this and have a moment, please let me know your thoughts.

As always, excuse my English, is not my first language.

I’m going to reblog the taglist in another post to see if that way this shows up in the Daryl tags.

#daryl dixon #daryl dixon fanfiction #daryl dixon imagine #daryl dixon/oc #daryl dixon x oc #daryl dixon & oc #daryl/oc #darylxoc #daryl x oc #daryl&oc #twd daryl #daryl twd #daryl dixon fanfic #daryl dixon fic #daryl fanfiction

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iamtheblondestblonde · 3 years

Text

The Clark Kent Effect

Part Three

AN: Imma be honest, I’m not happy with this part. I feel like my brain isn’t entirely ready for writing yet, it’s still wired to argue cases so please bear with me as I get my shit together. I still wanted to give the people who follow this story something though (you have no idea how happy I am about every single one of you) and I sincerely hope that this is good enough, apologies if not :)

Song: Catching Feelings - Drax Project (this will be a thing from now on)

Word Count: 4,6k

Warnings: explicit language I’m pretty sure but thats it

Masterlist / Part One / Part Two

You felt foolish really. It was as if your entire life had turned into a soap opera overnight. You wouldn’t call yourself cynical by all means, you loved love and everything that came along with it far too much for that, but you would’ve at least described yourself as rational.

Up until now.

Up until now you’d been convinced that if people really wanted to, they would be together. Up until now you’d been a believer of where there’s a will, there will be a way - relationships that would classify as statutory rape excluded of course, age was a bit more than just a number in those cases - but you, you, you had been stopped by the Bro-Code, which was just absolutely ridiculous.

Imagine telling that to your parents: Hey mom, so I met this great guy but I can’t do anything about it because he’s friends with my ex. Your grandma would straight up laugh in your face if you told her, the badass bitch had married her former lover’s rich best friend after she’d gotten the news that her fiancé hadn’t survived the war. Without needing to call her you knew that she’d tell you to go for Mat in a second, no matter how much she’d adored Tito back then.

But you weren’t your grandma and Tito hadn’t died in a war so here you were, pining over a guy you couldn’t have and practically living out a tragic romance novel. Technically you didn’t even know if Tito would have anything negative to say about the entire situation, it may all be water under the bridge by now, but you also couldn’t just casually ask him without giving anything away.

The only good thing about this situation was that Tito had brought a great group of people along with him into your life. He’d always been good at making friends, that certainly hadn’t changed from when he was younger and since the two of you had hit it up again your friend groups had seemingly merged without issue. It sure made for an interesting dynamic. You’d had some explaining to do whenever you initiated someone new into a group that also included your ex, but the result was definitely worth it.

Spending time with Tito was just as easy as it used to be, back before feelings complicated everything. Somehow you’d managed to fall back into a completely platonic relationship, one that worked just as well when the two of you were alone as it did with others around.

You’d missed having him around the years before, his view on things and the way he’d always managed to make decisions easy by providing simple solutions.

Should you get a puppy right now? - No, your apartment is too small for a big dog right now and no, you also shouldn’t settle for a purse-sized dog because you’ve always wanted a big one since you were little.

Maybe a cat instead? - No, you are allergic to cats, don’t be stupid.

What about one of those naked ones? - Also no, you need to bathe those frequently because of the built up oils on their skin and you don’t even have a bathtub in your apartment.

(You really had to bathe those from time to time, you’d looked it up. Apparently they could still trigger allergies as well, which straight up sucked.)

Should we grab Thai or Chinese? – Chinese, you told me about this new place you wanted to try out like three days ago.

What can I do to stop this one coworker from belittling and making fun of me? - I’ll help you make her jealous, how about some courtside seats to watch the Nets since she likes basketball?

The last idea had actually come from Mat (since Tito didn’t know shit about basketball), who had also pulled some strings to get four tickets so you could attend the game with Dana, Tito and him. Mat had even taken some pictures of Dana and you in your jerseys and at the game so you could post about your night excessively on your social media, making sure that said co-worker would see it. They’d also given you a tour of the building and you were surprised to say that their locker didn’t smell as bad as you’d expected.

Said coworker hadn’t said anything ever since by the way, but you could still see her lurking on your Instagram.

For all the advice Tito provided you with, you still hadn’t asked him the one thing you needed an answer to:

Is Mat off limits?

But you couldn’t do that and therefore it somehow became a normal thing for Mat and you to walk on eggshells around each other after the “incident” at the bar.

From time to time there were moments that made it blatantly obvious how good things could be – the time he’d excitedly side hugged-you after the Nets turned the game that one night before realizing what he’d just done and quickly letting go, how he’d found you in the crowd and looked straight at you after scoring a goal at one of his games before being swept away by his teammates or simply how you could see him looking around until he found you whenever your group met up – but they never lasted more than a few seconds.

The two of you were stuck, neither of you wanting to hurt Tito’s feelings. At least with your big group moments with Mat alone were rare. They still happened from time to time though, especially since the majority of your friends wasn’t even aware of your dilemma, which was why you found yourself in the passenger seat of his car on a Friday night.

Emily’s boyfriend Rafael had finally returned from a two-month-long work trip to Spain and was dead set on making an authentic recipe he’d been taught over there for everyone. Unfortunately he’d made the mistake of putting Emily in charge of getting the needed groceries and in true Emily fashion she’d forgotten to buy tomatoes. Something neither of them had noticed until Rafael had wanted to start cooking as soon as everyone arrived at their place. Maybe Emily had done it on purpose or maybe she hadn’t been thinking properly in that moment, too caught up in the fact that her lover was with her again, but she’d tasked Mat and you with a last-minute errand run to the store.

You couödn’t stop yourself from checking out the wine aisle though, leaving him waiting behind, dutifully holding a bag of fresh tomatoes and checking his phone while you inspected the options. Rafael had asked you to bring some wine as well but the one he’d requested was apparently out of stock.

“Barzal”, you called for his attention, inspecting a label to try and figure out if it was a suitable replacement, “you think Rafael would like this one?”

As you turned around with the bottle in your hand you were taken by surprise by Mat’s proximity. You hadn’t even noticed how close he’d moved until now and for a couple of seconds you were caught up in your daydreams again. He seemed to struggle with the same thing, his pupils blown and his breathing growing uneven while the two of you just stared at each other. His lips were so close and so incredibly inviting, his mouth slightly agape.

If I leaned up on my tippy toes right now I could-

You quickly stopped yourself from finishing that thought, looking down so you had a couple of seconds to gather your thoughts, thoughts Mat seemed to infiltrate constantly. By the time you dared to look up again he was running his hand across his face in frustration before slowly breathing out and returning to his cool and collected regular self.

“I’m the wrong person to ask this, he was drinking some red wine earlier and the one you picked out is obviously red but that’s about it. Wine culture is definitely lost on me, sorry. I prefer beer.”

“Stereotypical hockey player through and through, I see.” Later on you’d tell yourself that the smirk that followed made your brain short-circuit, because there was no other way to explain why you’d keep on flirting otherwise.

“Maybe one day I’ll teach you, only if you’re nice to me though”, you teased, maybe in an effort to take control over the situation, maybe because you simply couldn’t stop yourself but his laugh made your heart soar for one second, until you remembered why this shouldn’t be happening.

Maybe you simply were an undiscovered masochist because even though you knew you should stay away from him you kept finding yourself in situations like this one way too many times. Deciding that you’d simply drink the wine by yourself if anyone had an issue with it - drowning your sorrows seemed like a great idea either way right now - you handed him a second bottle before moving to leave the aisle and in turn his personal space.

Making eye contact with Colin standing a couple of meters away from you got you to do a full 180 though, almost smacking into Mat in the process, who had obviously followed you towards the cashiers.

What was it with Mat and you?!

While a collision was thankfully avoided, Colin’s presence could cause other problems, since he hadn’t exactly appreciated you breaking off things over a month ago. Because you hadn’t known him for long it had taken you longer than you liked to admit to realize that he was a manipulative bastard, you weren’t proud of that, and you had no idea how he’d act right now.

“What’s wrong?”

“My ex is over there and I don’t want to talk to him. Is he walking in our direction?”

Mat lifted his concerned glance from you to look over your shoulder so he could be on the lookout.

“If he’s the one wearing a Gucci hoodie that is so obviously fake then yes, he is walking in our direction.”

You let out a snort at the casual burn but you weren’t too happy about having to face Colin right now. He hadn’t even crossed your mind in these past few weeks but for him to cross paths with you while you were with Mat of all people seemed to be yet another one of these odd twists of fate your life seemed to attract lately. Maybe your guardian angel had decided to start a meth lab instead sometime recently, there was no other way to explain what was going on instead.

“Uh.. you look good, don’t worry, he’s definitely the one that missed out. Do- do you want me to pretend to be your boyfriend or something?”, Mat stuttered out nervously, probably noticing your anxious shifting and you couldn’t help but smile at his words, despite him being wrong about the reason behind your nervousness.

“Thanks for the offer”, you gave him a gentle smile of reassurance before continuing, “but no, it’s not about the way I look or anything like that, I don’t give a fuck what he thinks of me because he’s an idiot. I just don’t want him to cause any problems and if I could I’d just run away from him forever so he doesn’t have the chance to ever ruin my night again.”

“Well I’m no expert on forever, but I’m here right now and I say fuck that guy”, he responded and with that he grabbed your hand and started running towards the cashiers, leaving you with no other choice but to run along with him so he wouldn’t rip your arm out of its socket.

Oh how you wished you had a picture of the expression on Colin’s face as Mat and you ran past him, hand in hand and cackling like maniacs.

He was apparently too stunned to follow you as you fought over who would pay for the stuff - Mat ultimately winning - but you didn’t let that stop you from running all the way to this car as well. Of course hand in hand.

Masochist.

Somehow the weird tension between the two of you seemed to lift sometime during your little sprint but you weren’t sure if this would be permanent or if it was a spur of the moment thing. You’d be damned if you didn’t enjoy it while it lasted though.

The entire ride back you couldn’t stop thinking about the way his hand had felt in yours and what a perfect fit it had been, desperately wanting to feel it again as the two of you sang along to the songs playing over the speakers, perfectly happy in your little bubble.

As Christmas approached Emily roped everyone in to accompany her on her mission to make Rafael appreciate the cold that taken over New York. According to her he dearly missed sunny Spain but all you could see was a man who was happy to be home again. You weren’t about to tell her that though, you’d long figured out that whenever she’d set her mind to something it was best to simply follow along. Everyone else had apparently come to the same realization because no one objected to her plans.

Emily wanted to take Rafael ice skating and since the Rockefeller Center apparently wasn’t good enough and too crowded, she told everyone to meet at Pier 17. Dana and Mariah were on board of course and you’d managed to convince Tito to come along, who had in turn invited Mat.

In a ridiculous attempt to not get spotted, both Mat and Tito had donned a pair of glasses and while you were used to seeing them on Tito by now, seeing Mat with them again knocked the breath out of your lungs for a second.

It had been almost two months since you’d last seen him like this and the fact that you hadn’t recognized him that night seemed impossible to you now. Maybe it was because you’d gotten to know him since, seeing him in real life instead of only on pictures and memorizing his handsome features in the process but as you tried to get a good glance at him without anyone noticing you realized that he’d never be Clark Kent to you again.

Whether that was a good or a bad thing was still left to decide though.

“Need help with those?”, Mat’s voice ripped you out of your thoughts. You’d been so lost in them that you hadn’t even noticed that everyone else had already laced up their skates and walked out onto the ice while you’d been staring at your hands for who knows how long, laces wrapped around your fingers but not doing anything. Tito and him had brought their own skates while everyone else had to rely on rentals and his were already laced up perfectly of course.

You nodded, despite full well knowing how to do it yourself but you weren’t about to stop Mat from pulling your leg into his lap so he had better access. Besides, you’d stupidly forgotten to bring gloves and you’d gladly take any chance to leave your hands stuffed inside the pockets of your jacket as you rapidly got colder.

His fingers worked quickly, tightening the laces with expertise and you watched his hand moving in awe.

If hockey ever wasn’t an option for him anymore, hand modeling definitely was. He had such nice hands, strong and big and perfect. For a quick second your thoughts drifted to what else they could be capable of, before you reeled them back in, mentally scolding yourself. It really wasn’t your fault, not thinking of him seemed impossible these days.

His eyes were mostly focused on his work but from time to time he’d lift his gaze and give you a small smile, one you happily returned despite the mess inside your head. He had just finished tying the second one when someone banged on the glass, making the both of you jump a little.

“Ayo Barzy get your filthy paws off Y/N!”, Tito yelled before zooming away again laughing loudly, leaving an awkward silence behind.

Was this just Tito being his usual little-shit-self or was he actually serious?

For a couple of seconds you couldn’t do anything but stare at Mat as he looked down onto his hands, one of them still loosely wrapped around your ankle. Carefully you pulled your leg off his lap, set both feet on the ground and got up.

It was apparently time to face reality again.

You waited until there was a break in the throngs of people circling around the rink before stepping onto the ice, muscle memory from your childhood kicking in immediately. Once you were convinced that you weren’t going to fall on your ass you did a couple of little spins until you were facing Mat again, who had followed you. He looked at you with a slack jaw and you laughed at his expression.

“You can skate?!”, he asked bewildered and you laughed again, moving so the both of you could skate beside each other at a relaxed pace.

“Obviously. Sorry to ruin your late night fantasies of teaching me how to skate but I’m a good Canadian girl and I did some figure skating when I was younger. I actually used to be pretty fast.”

That caught his attention and you smiled at the way he looked down at you with a conspiring grin.

“Oh yeah? Show me what you got then”, after a couple of seconds of contemplation he continued, “last one to reach the others owes the winner coffee.”

You looked around to find the rest of your group, spotting them on the other side messing around. Of course.

“You’re on, Barzy. I hope you’re ready to lose though”, you winked at him before racing towards your friends, leaving him and his exclamations about you being a cheater behind, now definitely not cold anymore.

Something in your relationship seemed to shift after that, at least whenever you were alone with him. Things were still difficult around others, especially with the way Emily kept prodding you for updates and Tito constantly disturbing the few moments you had alone with him. You weren’t sure yet if he did it on purpose or if he simply had awful timing but it wasn’t like it made a difference.

Christmas came and passed just as fast, the team leaving for a roadtrip shortly after. You’d celebrated New Year’s Eve with your friends in a club, unable to kiss the person you wanted to either way so your lips had stayed untouched as the fireworks went off at midnight and the days following.

Tito had announced that the guys would return later in the day though, already making plans in the groupchat to meet up tomorrow. While you wondered where he got all this energy from you suspected it was a way to distract himself as the trip hadn’t been successful - to put it mildly. In reality they’d ate shit, losing all of their games, some to teams that should have been an easy win.

It was hard to watch on TV but even harder to talk to the guys afterwards.

A couple of hours later you sat on the couch, a book in hand that you’d meant to read for weeks and enjoying staying in on a Friday for once. You were so lost in the story that it took you a couple of seconds to realize that someone had knocked on your door.

Who could that be?

Tito or Emily were most likely to show up unannounced at your day but you knew that Tito would be on his way to his home so he could sulk by himself and Emily was away on a ski trip with Rafael. Unwrapping yourself from your fuzzy blanket you padded towards the door, taken aback by who was waiting on the other side.

“What..”, you trailed of questionably, not even sure what you were going to say in the first place.

Mat looked so out of place in the dimly lit hallway, dressed in a suit that fit him so nicely, bag set on the ground next to him.

“Can I come in?”, was all he said and you nodded, unable to bring yourself to say anything else.

How could you even refuse him?

You didn’t move from your spot beside the door and after taking off his shoes he took a couple of steps inside your apartment, hanging up his coat before turning back around to face you.

“You’re probably wondering why I’m here but if I’m honest I can’t even tell you. I just didn’t want to be alone tonight and since you seem to constantly be on my mind either way..”, he trailed off, seemingly gathering his thoughts before continuing, “I don’t know if you watched the games or-“

“I did and you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to”, you said softly as you interrupted him, sensing his apprehension. You decided that you weren’t about to touch his admission of thinking of you all the time with a ten-foot-pole, instead focusing on the rest of his sentence. He looked so broken and lost standing there so you couldn’t help but take the few steps it took to reach him, wrapping your arms around him in a tight hug.

You knew from personal experience with Tito that athletes tended to take losses personal and if you had to take a guess you were pretty sure that Mat was one of those guys that blamed himself for them as well.

At first he seemed surprised about your bold move – it was the most the two of you had ever touched so far – but he quickly caught himself, hugging you even tighter to his body. For a couple of seconds you stood just like that, simply basking in each other’s proximity.

It was as if your bodies were made for each other, your head resting perfectly in the crook of his neck. Despite probably just getting off a plane he smelled so good and you were trying to figure out if you could take a deep breath without raising any suspicions. Before you’d managed to make a decision however, he pulled away and you unfortunately had to untangle yourself from him.

“Feel free to stay as long as you want to”, you said to fill the silence, leaving out the part where you hoped he’d stay for the night as well. He simply nodded before asking where he could change into more comfortable clothes. While you were sad to see the suit go you directed him to your bedroom, glad to have taken those thirty minutes earlier to tidy up.

He returned in a pair of grey sweatpants and a hoodie and it took every last remaining bit of your willpower not to drool at the sight of him. Somehow he managed to look even better in sweats than he did in his custom suit, which really wasn’t fair at all.

You had to admit it was a little weird to see him in your apartment though. He’d been over a couple of times to pregame etc. but he’d never been here alone. Somehow it felt strangely intimate to have him over by himself on this Friday night. To prevent your thoughts from going to a direction they definitely shouldn’t, you asked:

“Do you want some tea? I know technically you still owe me that coffee but I’ll be generous and let you off easy this time.”

For good measure you even threw in a wink at the end and your words had the desired effect, breaking the loaded tension completely.

“You cheated! I would’ve won if you hadn’t started early”, he exclaimed but the way he was laughing showed that he was anything but butthurt about the situation.

“Mmm keep telling yourself that, it’s okay”, you kept on teasing as he followed you into your small kitchen that was definitely at maximum capacity with two people in it. You’d be lying if you said that you didn’t enjoy the closeness the tight space prompted though.

With a steaming mug of tea the both of you settled onto your couch shortly after, also small enough to keep you close together. You’d been wanting to buy a bigger one for weeks, but right now you certainly didn’t mind its size.

Masochist.

“Oh I love that one, the chimpanzees are so cute”, Mat said to your surprise as he finally realized what was playing on your tv and you looked at him in utter disbelief. You certainly hadn’t pegged him for a guy that liked to watch nature documentaries but yet here he was, constantly surprising you.

“What? Documentaries are very soothing”, he defended himself and you had to laugh at the way he looked like a little kid with his floppy hair and the cute way his eyebrows had scrunched up.

“I know. That’s why I love watching them as well.”

You hadn’t exactly pictured yourself watching documentaries with him on a Friday night, something that felt way too domestic if you were being honest, but yet here you were.

As the hour grew later both Mat and you sunk further in the cushions and while you had no recollection of how exactly it had happened, your head apparently ended up on his shoulder somehow. Your only regret was that now it wasn’t as easy to sneak glances at him from time to time without him noticing. At one point he’d even wrapped his arm around you, moving both of you into a more comfortable position before covering your bodies with the fuzzy blanket and the steady rhythm of his heartbeat lulled you to sleep before you even knew it.

The soft sound of your name woke you up sometime later, you weren’t exactly sure how much time had passed but the credits of the second documentary you’d started were already rolling and you were pretty sure you’d only caught the first half of it. In your sleep you’d cuddled up even closer, your arm wrapped around Mat’s midriff and you quickly sat up, embarrassed about turning into a koala in your sleep. Maybe you could blame it on the documentary?

“Sorry for waking you but I should probably head home. Otherwise my back is going to kill me tomorrow.” His voice was a little hoarse and it was obvious that he’d fallen asleep as well, his hair now sticking up in multiple directions. You suppressed a giggle at the disheveled sight of him, instead appreciating that he let down his guard enough for you to see him that way.

“Yeah of course. I’ll show you out.”

“Thank you for tonight. It means a lot to me”, he said quietly as he stood by the door, ready to leave.

“Anytime Mat. Get home safe.” It was the first time you’d called him by his first name, after months of first calling him Barzal then Barzy and he must have noticed as well because his smile could probably make glaciers melt at this point. You weren’t even sure why you’d given up your pathetic way of distancing yourself from him – despite the fact that it was very much obvious that it wasn’t working – but to not call him Mat would feel wrong after this evening.

“Have a good night, Y/N”, he simply said, still smiling as he leaned down to kiss you on the forehead before walking out the door, leaving you speechless.

Tagging: @jamiedrysdales @nazdaddy @itrocksmysocks @yeeehaw-hockey @whitesummerx @teenagekook

#mat barzal #mat barzal x reader #mat barzal imagine #nhl fanfiction #hockey imagine #hockey writing #nhl players #nhl #my writing #new york islanders

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myhockeyworld87 · 4 years

Text

Not So Dangerous Liaison - Sidney Crosby - Part 14

Word Count: 3,822

POV: Sidney’s

Warning: Language, NSFW, Smut

Notes: I don’t really have any this week. Guess my brain is fried...haha So Happy Reading!

NSDL Masterlist

You could tell the moment (Y/N) excused herself from the table something was wrong. It was obvious that she didn't need another glass of wine, as hers was still half full, but something had upset her and you needed to know what it was. "I'll be right back." You told your family seated around you when she didn't return. Searching the private box, you found no trace of her and even Vero hadn't seen her in some time. A worrisome feeling crept into your heart, as you headed outside in hopes of finding her.

She was standing near the railing overlooking the parking lot, all alone. "There you are. I thought something happened…" You trailed off, once you saw the look on her face. "What's wrong?" As you went to reach for her, she pulled away, almost stumbling in the process, though she righted herself. "Babe, what happened?"

She crossed her arms in front of herself, a defense mechanism if ever you saw one, and it had you wondering why she was suddenly putting up walls. The last several days had been magical, and really everything you'd ever wanted. Hell, if you were being completely honest with yourself; you were falling in love with her, but it was obvious from the look on her face she wasn't feeling the same way. Which truly baffled you, since it was only moments ago, she was teasing and laughing with you. "(Y/N) talk to me."

"I don't think I can do this."

She didn't say anything more, but your heart sunk all the same. Still, you found yourself asking, "Do what?"

She closed her eyes for a moment, shielding you from her thoughts and you wanted to take her in your arms and tell her that everything would be all right, even without knowing what was wrong. "Us," she finally breathed out, and it felt like you'd just been hit in the face with a ninety mile an hour puck.

"Why?" It was the only word your mouth could seem to form, yet there were so many other things you wanted to say.

She finally looked you in the eye and you saw how much this was hurting her, but yet you couldn't comprehend why she was doing it. "It's just more than I thought it would be."

You reached for her again, thinking that if you could just touch her, she'd understand that the two of you could get through whatever seemed to be going on in her brain. She countered with a step back as if knowing that small contact would break her resolve and bring her back to her senses. "I don't understand. Ten minutes ago, we were fine." You grabbed the back of your neck as you could feel the pounding of your heart moving up to your brain and you needed to stave it off to think, to reason with her, to let her know that whatever doubts she was having; you could work through.

"I just…" Tears formed in her eyes and she turned from you, in an effort to strengthen her determination.

The position left her vulnerable, and you took the opportunity to do what you so desperately wanted since the moment you looked into her face. Sliding your arms around her waist, you pulled her close to your chest, willing her to feel your heart and how much it was breaking at that moment. "Shhh, just stop for a minute ok." You took a deep breath, feeling her intake with you. Without conscious thought, your bodies moved in sync with one another, almost as if you'd been made for each other. It gave you a chance to think, to replay all that had happened those last few moments together. One second, you'd been tickling her, laughing with her and then… That was it. "This is about Cole Harbour isn't it?" You could feel her swallow hard, as her gut clenched at the mention of your hometown. "And Europe?" Had you not been so aware of her body and it's every movement, you would've missed the small nod she gave. Your heart did a little flip as it started a regular rhythm again, now that you knew the problem.

You turned her in your arms and she moved easily, head hanging low as she wouldn't look you in the eye. "(Y/N), sweetheart, look at me." You needed her to not only hear you say the words but understand that you meant every one of them. She raised her chin, with slight encouragement from your thumb and index finger. "I want you to come with me. We just haven't had a chance to talk about it." A faint smile graced your lips, you hoped it was one she'd return yet she didn't. "I mean if you don't want to that's fine too. We can stay in Pittsburgh, though I'd like to head up and spend my day with the cup up there, but we can work it out."

"Sid, I can't go with you." You looked at her curiously, for she wasn't making any sense. "I have a job, that's here, but that shouldn't stop you from having a great summer and meeting new people or hanging out with old friends and going to extraordinary places. I just think…" You went to stop her from saying anything further, but she silenced you with a finger to your lips. "I just think that maybe we'd be better off if we weren't together. We were rushing things as it was and I don't want to hold you back."

You gave her twenty seconds before you started in. "Can I talk now?" When she nodded, you continued. "Ok first point, you can work from my place." She went to protest and it was your turn to hold up a finger to her. "And before you say anything, I will let you know that like seventy percent of the people do. You don't think JR or coach or hell even Dana stays in Pittsburgh the whole summer? If you don't believe me, I'll march in there and drag them out to tell you. I realize your job is new, but I'm sure when you talk to Mario, you'll find out what I'm saying is true." She seemed to mull your words over a bit, which you took as a good sign. "Second, all of us deserve a vacation, and maybe I planned this trip to Europe a while ago, but it doesn't mean that I don't want you to go with me. God, do you know how badly I want to show you the Eiffel Tower or walk in the Louvre with you for hours on end. Europe is full of history and there is no one I want to share it with more than you." When she didn't say anything, you pulled her closer to you, lacing your fingers together behind her back, trapping her to your body. "I want to lie with you on a beach in Spain or maybe Monte Carlo. I hear you can go topless there." That cracked a small smile and you took it for a victory, before bending down and pecking her lips. "We'll do it on whatever timeframe you want. Just say you're with me because I don't want to go if you're not."

She hesitated, you saw it in her eyes and the way she stiffened slightly in your arms, and it worried you that it was something more. "Unless it's something else? Just tell me what it is (Y/N) and I'll prove to you that we can handle it."

"It's just…what if I'm not cut out to be your girlfriend?"

You pulled your brows together, for you couldn't imagine where she would get such a silly idea. "Seriously, (Y/N)? If anyone's not worthy here, it's me of you?" She shook her head at the statement. "I've never met a more kind, caring, and loving person than you. Do you remember that first night, I came to your room after the run-in with what's his name?" Of course, you remembered his name, you just didn't want to give it any credence. "I took in everything that night. You'd been so concerned about everyone else; you didn't care that you had no view in your room, or snacks to get you through the long hours, we have. You just did without, because you were too concerned about the rest of us to think about yourself. And it pains me to say this, but that night with Beau, you put him above your own reputation. I was so jealous I couldn't even see straight." Even now the thought of her with Beau made your blood pressure rise.

"I'm the one that's not cut out to be with you, but I want to at least try and show you that I'm worthy of your time." You touched your forehead to hers. "I want to be with you (Y/N). These last couple of weeks as we've gotten closer have been the best of my life. You heard my mom, she hasn't seen me this happy before. That's because of you." You pulled her closer to emphasize the point. "Sure winning the Stanley Cup is great, but having you with me…well, it just makes life amazing." A weak smile crossed her lips and you knew you were getting the old (Y/N) back. "I know that dating me isn't going to be easy, but babe, please say you'll give it a try."

You kept her in the circle of your arms but moved back slightly to gauge where her thoughts were. Eyes scanning hers in hopes to see that sparkle that wasn't there when you first found her. It took a moment, and then it was there, and you felt your heart start beating regularly again. "I'm sorry Sid. I panicked. I do want to be with you." The moment you heard the words you just wanted to capture her lips, but they still kept speaking. "I guess my mind just kicked into hyperdrive or something because all I could see was how we couldn't work; instead of how we already do."

A lock of hair fell forward on her face, and you tucked the piece back behind her ear. "It's ok, just promise me next time, you'll talk to me about it before thinking the worst."

"I can do that." It was then that you finally bent and moved your lips across hers letting her set the pace. She opened for you easily, and your tongue swept in to mingle with hers. The kiss was soft and sensual and spoke of trust and two people learning to love one another. You could get lost for hours just doing this with her, but then you remembered where the two of you were.

"Come on, let's get back inside before we're missed."

She tugged on your hand, "Sidney," her voice had you turning back around to face her. "You're wrong you know." You had no clue what she was speaking of so you cocked your head in regards to her statement. "You're more than worthy of dating someone like me." You smirked at her words because you damn well hoped you were, considering how you felt about her. "Oh, and I always keep a pack of M & M's in my purse too. You just didn't see that when you were in my room."

"All this time you've been holding out on me." She made a move to go past you and you snatched her around the waist, hauling her against you and up off her feet. "Where's your purse woman? I need them now." Her laughter echoed through the hall and it was music to your ears. This was the woman you were falling in love with, the one that was playful and loving. Not that you didn't love her vulnerable side; you just didn't need it to doubt your relationship.

The rest of the afternoon went pretty smoothly. The Pirates ended up losing the game, but everyone still enjoyed themselves. Dinner ended up being a big affair at one of the local restaurants. As you had predicted in the morning, everyone in the place came over to congratulate you. It wasn't something that bothered you, for you knew they were just as excited as the team was in winning the Stanley Cup. Your only concern was for (Y/N). After today, you didn't need anything to make her question dating you,

any more than she obviously was, and you were sure having a ton of people wanting to pose for pictures and ask for autographs wasn't helping the matter. She seemed to be doing ok with everything though. She'd laugh and talk with Taylor and your parents while you made chit chat with strangers. Hopefully, this afternoon was just a fluke and the two of you were back on the same page.

Convincing her to spend the night was a whole other matter. "Babe, it's getting late; just spend the night. You know my parents don't care. Hell, they practically expect it."

"It's literally ten-thirty. That's not late."

"Ok well maybe it's not that late, but it's dark and I don't want you going home alone." It was a shot in the dark, but you thought maybe the overprotective boyfriend was the best route to go; however (Y/N) just rolled her eyes. So you were left with no other option. "Please," you begged, knowing that you sounded a little whiny.

"If your parents end up thinking I'm some two-bit whore; it's your fault."

"They're not going to think that." Wait, did she just give in. "Does this mean you're staying?"

"Yes, I'll stay, but it stays PG." Well, that remained to be seen, but you weren't going to divulge that. The two of you headed back into the family room, with the wine you'd been in the kitchen getting and continued to talk with your family for another hour. Shortly after that everyone retired for the evening. You snuck out and grabbed (Y/N)'s bag from the car, while she cleaned up the kitchen, then the both of you headed upstairs.

Things went similar to the night before, both of you getting ready for bed together in the ensuite. Only this time, (Y/N) wasn't wearing one of your t-shirts to bed. The fact that she'd chosen a cute little satin pajama short set didn't matter, because if you were being honest you liked seeing her in your clothes. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Like what?" you asked her as she grabbed the toothbrush she used last night.

"Like you're a lost puppy and I just kicked you."

"Oh my god, I do not look like that." The reflection in the mirror did show you were a tad disappointed but nothing like she described. She just raised an eyebrow as she started to brush her teeth. You thought about not saying anything because you planned on removing the garments shortly anyhow, but then you also didn't want her doubting things again. "It's just…well…I like it when you sleep in my shirt."

"Oh," she mumbled before spitting out the excess paste. "I just thought this would be better with your parents here."

It was your turn to roll your eyes. "Can we forget for like an hour that they are here?" Their visit, while welcomed, was also putting a serious damper on your newly found love life.

"An hour huh?"

By your calculations that would be plenty of time. "If that's all your giving me; I'll take what I can get." You hauled her close to your body, lifting her up on the vanity as you had the night before, then capturing her mouth with yours. You glided your hands across the satin of her nightshirt until they rested at the buttons where you slowly undid each one. She'd protested before about keeping things PG but you knew the moment you had her like this, she couldn't say no. The garment slid easily off her back and onto the sink, as she sat there naked from the waist up. "Think you can be quiet, baby girl?" You didn't give her time to answer as you took a taut nipple into your mouth to suck on. She whined softly, her hands threading through your hair. As your mouth moved to lavish her other breast, she cried out, the sound echoing off the bathroom walls and you felt her stiffen. "Don't even think about it, you said an hour." You teased her, though if she'd truly wanted you to stop you would have.

Her eyes locked with yours and she smiled at you. "Then we better move to the bedroom." She slid off the sink, her body slithering down yours and you knew she could feel your erection.

"Oh, you think that's gonna help you stay silent?" She grabbed your hand and led you closer to the bed.

"Who said I'm the one that's going to be moaning?" Before you knew what was happening, she dropped to her knees in front of you taking your boxers with her. Her hands glided along your inner thighs and you could feel her breath on your cock, before her tongue flipped out to lick the head. A moan came out of you and you had to bite your lip when she slid her mouth down your cock taking you inside. She pressed her tongue up against the underside as she moved back to the tip and you thought you were going to lose it right then and there. Her head bobbed up and down your shaft, and one of your hands threaded into her long locks. You wanted to tell her how good she felt, tell her that her mouth felt like a little slice of heaven but you didn't trust your voice.

One look down at her and you were completely undone, at the sight of her beautiful eyes staring up at you while she sucked you off. Her one hand was wrapped around the bottom of your shaft, while the other was toying with your balls. You knew she could feel them tense, under her fingers. She knew you were close, and still, she hummed softly in the back of her throat as she took you in deep. The primal grunt that left your body, as you tore her off your cock was loud and could probably be heard somewhere throughout the house but you didn't care. You didn't want to spend down her mouth, not like this, not when you could be inside her.

In one fell swoop, you lifted her off the ground and placed her on to the mattress. You made fast work of ridding her of her pajama bottoms and panties before your fingers stole down to her pussy to find her dripping wet, and you moaned into her mouth as you toyed with her slit. Her body writhed beneath you and you knew she was as close as you were to climaxing. It took everything in you to tear yourself away from her and fumble in the nightstand for a condom. As you rolled the latex onto your cock, she lay there flushed with desire filling her eyes, you nearly came right there in your hand. She bent her leg opening herself up to you and there was so much you wanted to say. How beautiful she looked. How you'd never felt like this in your entire life. How you wanted it to be like this with her forever. But there would be time for declarations later, when your body wasn't full of lust for the woman underneath you.

Taking your cock, you positioned it at her entrance and now it was her turn to bite her lips to stave off the moan you so desperately wanted to hear. You filled her inch by slow inch, the process killing you both but feeding your desire at the same time. She hooked her legs around your waist pressing you close, as you bottomed out. Both of your hands were pressed against the mattress by her head, your faces mere inches apart so that you could feel her breath on your skin. "I could stay right here forever." You whispered, and she whimpered at your words.

Bringing your lips to hers, you kissed her deeply as her hands stole around your neck bringing you closer. She broke the kiss but kept contact with your eyes. "Please Sid…" her voice low and needy. "As much as love you like this, please move before I combust."

You chuckled at her words, and her light laughter joined yours until you gave her what she wanted. Her breath caught in her throat, and you bent close to whisper once again. "Combust eh? Let's see what we can do about that." You nibbled on her ear before sucking on that spot on her neck that you found drove her wild. Sliding your cock in and out her, you built up a slow rhythm that seemed to be driving (Y/N) crazy. Her nails dug into your back, as she arched up into you. It felt delicious and had you pounding into her faster, both of you panting as you tried to contain your screams. Her heels dug into your ass as she chased that high that both of you craved. Skating your hand between your bodies, you circled her clit a few times; a moan leaving her lips at the contact.

Tears welled in her eyes, as she held back her scream. Her pussy spasming around you as her orgasm hit her. You captured her lips and she let go completely, absorbing the moan she so desperately tried to contain. She pulled you down with her, and with a few sloppy thrusts, you came deep inside her; your body shuddering with the release. You rolled you both onto your sides, this time hoping not to crush her as you collapsed like you did last night. Her breasts rose and fell as she panted for air, though you were no different. "Mmmm," she hummed. "That was definitely the best sixty minutes I've spent in a long time."

You pecked her lips quick, then stole a glance at the nightstand. "We still have…looks like nine minutes left." With a slight shake of her head, she laughed softly at you. "What? I'm taking of every advantage I can get."

"Not that I don't love your parents, but…"

"They're leaving the day after tomorrow. Trust me I'm counting the hours."

"Oh really?" She asked while you peppered her with soft kisses.

"MmmHmm," You pulled back to look at her. "Because as much fun as that was. I love making you moan."

"Mmm, that goes both ways, mister." She'd already proven earlier how well she could do that, though you were more than ready to go at it again.

#Not So Dangerous Liaison Series #Sidney Crosby #sidney crosby imagine #Sidney Crosby Imagines #Sidney Crosby Smut #Pittsburgh Penguins fanfiction #Pittsburgh Penguins imagine #Pittsburgh Penguins imagines #nhl imagines #nhl imagine #nhl fanfic #nhl smut #hockey imagines #hockey imagine #hockey fanfiction #hockey smut

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greekowl87 · 3 years

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Fic: Watching in the Shadows

A/N: I’ve had difficulty bringing myself to write anything since October. I had some personal issues to work through regarding my anxiety and life. I’m still trying to work through it right now but I managed to cobble this together over the past month. This isn’t my best work and I’ve probably done something like this before (another fic that was a post-ep of FTF), but I at least managed to write something. Sorry. If you've gotten this far, thanks again for taking the time to look it over.

Also, no beta. Is AO3 more your thing, you can read this here

Tagging @today-in-fic @improlificinsarcasm @suitablyaggrieved @baronessblixen

The nightmares had started shortly after Mulder’s one-in-a-million successful rescue and their daring seascape from Antarctica. Somehow, they had made it with some minor scrapes, bruising, and some frostbite. They came back to D.C. and it was questionable whether they still had jobs or not. The x-files had been burnt in a flash of lost hopes and dreams. Only the ashes were left, smeared by the boots of the notorious Them.

After their latest jaunt in Arizona chasing more would be aliens exploding from human chests and poor Gibson Praise, Scully wondered if God was trying to take a cue from James Cameron. That ended roughly too. In addition to the nightmares she refused to acknowledge, the added insecurity of Diana Fowley was like a harbinger of the future.

Scully twisted in bed, her cotton sheets coiling around her like a python. It was suffocating. She was in that weird twilight of waking and still traipsing through a dream. Those that said you didn’t dream of color were wrong. She remembered flashes of being locked in that tube with that thing shoved down her throat. The cold that had eaten into her bones and down to her core, making her feel brittle. She remembered seeing those gelatinous bodies in Texas and remembered her fear. That would be her. That would be her fate.

Of course, she wouldn’t tell Mulder. Why would he believe her anyway? His thoughts were up in the clouds trying to get their work back. Scully finally woke up gasping. Her hand clutched her chest to feel her racing heart, mentally calming herself that nothing had exploded out of her chest. Her fingers touched the tiny gold cross and she squeezed it so hard so it would be indented in her finger pads.

“I’m alive,” she whispered to the shadows in the room. “I’m alive.”

The fragments of memory were still there, just like something you couldn’t see out from the corner of your eye but you knew it was there. She glanced at the alarm clock. 4:01 am. It was a Saturday so she would not have gone to work. She could afford to sleep. But was she going to?

During the past six years, she did not get nightmares. Not normally anyway. There were a few after Pfaster and then with her cancer. Without ignoring the science...damn her own words. She turned out the bedside lamp and got out of bed. Without really thinking (it was still night in her opinion), she went to her kitchen and filled her teapot. As she tried to decide what tea to drink, she heard a light knocking on her door.

There would only be one person who would knock on her door this early (or late).

Scully opened it without ceremony, replying, “The last time you came to my door, you were drunk and dragged me across the country. It’s Saturday and I’m not going anywhere.”

He looked tired, worse than usual. The bags under his eyes indicated something much worse. He read her unspoken question. “I haven’t slept in over 24 hours, Scully. I’m not planning on anything. I just didn’t know where else to go.”

He knew what just to say to pull at her heartstrings. She took his hand and pulled him into her apartment, locking the door behind her. “I can’t either.”

“Nightmares?”

The word was effortless, showing just how well he knew her. “Something like that. I was about to make tea. Do you want some?”

“Do you have anything stronger?”

“How about we settle in the middle? A hot toddy? You can stay here in the meantime.”

“What? You’re not going to kick out self-deprecating and self-pitying Spooky Mulder?”

“Of course not,” she said. “Is that even a question?”

She selected two bags of Chai tea with two mugs. She went to another cupboard and stood on her tiptoes, trying to reach a rarely used bottle. In three easy strides, Mulder was behind her. “The rum?”

She nodded and felt him press behind her, easily getting the bottle. “Grog?”

She chuckled. “Not quite. Hot toddy. I think it might be better for helping get us back to sleep.”

“A sleepover?”

“A sleepover,” she chuckled. This is how she liked her Mulder and she felt those insecure thoughts replaced with a warmth that she had come to know. “Maybe I’ll let you even play twister.”

“Scully,” he chuckled.

“Go make yourself comfortable. I’ll be there in a second.”

She heard him kick off his shoes and take off his leather jacket, indicating he had no plans to leave anytime soon. Scully was fine with this. He flipped on her television, keeping the volume low. She laughed when she saw James Cameron’s ‘Alien’ come on and Mulder looked at her funny. “What?”

“I...it’ll sound stupid…” She shook her head. “Never mind.”

“Tell me,” he encouraged.

“I’ve had trouble sleeping since Antarctica.” She nodded towards the television. “My nightmares. I wonder if James Cameron is playing a role. I keep seeing myself back on that ship. And after...the face-hugger.” She motioned to her chest. “Bursting out in all the bloody glory.”

“But it didn’t, Scully. It didn’t.”

“Still doesn’t stop the nightmares.” She first added generous amounts of the spiced rum and then the Chai tea. “I was awake and aware when I was in that tube. Not all the time but I was awake. I remember. I remember the coldness...” She shook her head and her voice faded.

Mulder nodded gently. “I get the impression that you don’t want me to talk about the subject.”

“I don’t want to fight, Mulder. I don’t want to fight about the report, the work, or Fowley right now. I’m tired.” She rubbed her eyes. “Nor do I want to scold you on what happened in the Bermuda Triangle. We both know how stupid that was.”

Mulder was quiet. “I do trust your judgment, I do trust you. Without you...I probably would have been stuck in 1939 with no way home.”

“Mulder.”

“I do trust you,” he repeated, with more certainty. “More than anything.”

Scully nodded, satisfied with his response. She took the two mugs and walked them over. “So,” she said, “you had to pick Alien after I told you God is consulting with James Cameron?”

“Run of the luck. Do you want me to change it?”

“No, no. It’s fine.”

Mulder sipped the hot toddy, his eyebrows arching in surprise. “You didn’t go light.”

“No, but it works well together. Don’t you agree?”

“Very good.”

“So, Scully, since we’re having a sleepover, wanna play truth or dare?”

“Excuse me?”

“Truth or dare?” He smirked.

She was tired. Maybe her brain wasn’t working correctly. Maybe the lack of sleep had something to do with it. She decided to indulge him this time. “Truth.”

“Okay,” he paused. “What was your nightmare about?”

“Very smooth and not at all obvious.” He shrugged, sipped the hot beverage, and watched her. She sighed. “What could have been if you had not gotten to me in time when they took me.” She recognized that look and she hated it. “Stop profiling me.”

“I’m not.” He looked almost insulted. “I was just hoping to hear more. But it’s your turn. Truth or dare?”

“Truth. Ask your question, Scully so we both can get it over it.”

The sharpness in his voice took her off guard. “What are you talking about?”

“What are you talking about?”

“I asked you first.”

“Truth. No. Fact. I do love you.”

“I…” She felt panic rise in her chest. No. No, no, no. “Mulder…” He held his hand up and she grabbed it, shooing it away. This was getting out of hand. “Not like this. Quit messing with me, Mulder.”

She got up quickly and downed the scalding liquid. She winced. “I’m not.”

“It’s not funny,” she said again in warning. “Stop messing with me. This entire game is stupid. Why did I even let you talk me into this?”

Scully remembered how her mom used to force Melissa to include Scully in her sleepovers. Even though there were only two years between her and Missy, Scully always felt like the odd one out. Nerdy Dana who always had her nose buried in a science book. Why don’t you marry Einstein they would tease. As much as she loved her sister, that game left nothing but bitter memories for her.

Mulder frowned, surprised by her sudden reaction. He didn’t know why the words fumbled out of his mouth the way they did. But now that it had happened, he couldn’t see a reason why not. He watched her set the forgotten drink on the kitchen table and pace.

“Scully.”

“Why did you come here? Why did you come here, Mulder?” She wrapped her arms around herself. Maybe she was caught in the throes of another nightmare. “Answer me!”

“Do you want me to leave, Scully?” He asked. “If that’s what you want, I have no problem doing that.”

“I didn’t say that. Stop twisting my words.”

“Then come back here and sit down.”

After a moment’s hesitation, she bit her lip and nodded. She sat at the opposite end of the couch. Mulder suddenly felt the dynamic shift between them and it was like a game of chess. “For the record, I do not feel comfortable about this.”

“Noted. Now, what did you dream about?”

“The first time I was abducted, there was some trauma there. Bits and pieces. But this time was different. I dream that I die. You don’t come. That thing explodes out of me like those crime scene photos. I performed the autopsy on that body and saw what happened. That was going to become me.

“And I die to expect during all this, I am alive and I feel every sensation. I don’t know what is worse: knowing that I almost died from the virus or the chip in my neck.” Scully found herself confessing fears that she had managed to repress for the past year. “Ruskin Dam. Skyline Mountain. The cancer. And now this same Earth-based virus that we also found in Gibson Praise. What do you think it means, Mulder? It terrifies me.”

Mulder fumbled over her words in his mind. Where does he even begin? “I came here because I didn’t know where else to go. The bar…” He snorted with displeasure. “After what happened in Dallas, I was devastated. After almost losing you, well, let’s just say I got my priorities straight.”

“Priorities.”

What the hell was going on between them? “What are we doing here, Mulder?”

“What do you mean?”

“This. You come over at 4 am. Make me confess my soul.”

“It is Saturday so it’s not like we have to work.”

“We may not even have jobs.”

He held up a finger. “Prohibition period, remember? We do have jobs. We just to get to do background checks and chase shit around the country.”

“I don’t see what’s so great about it.”

“I have you. You’re still here with me. She wasn’t.”

“She?”

“Diana.”

Scully frowned at the mere mention of the name. “I still don’t see why you trust her or what you see.”

“She was there when I found the x-files. But who is here now, where she could still have a promising career in medicine despite the fact most of her patients are dead?”

“Except for one.”

Mulder smiled. “You’re still here. After all this, after all that we’ve been through. You’re the one I trust the most.” He sighed and sipped the hot toddy. “I still trust her because how could I not, Scully? But she’s not the one I went to at four am.”

She remembered going to him at the reflection pool at twilight, taking his hand, a wordless promise to each other. “Touché.” She relaxed. “Look, I’m sure you didn’t mean that…”

“I did.”

Shit. “Let’s put a pin in that thought,” she said quickly. Mulder sat his mug on her coffee table. “Coaster.”

He grabbed two and slid them across her oak coffee table. “Why is it so hard to wrap your mind around it?”

“Well,” she began, struggling to find her voice. “There’s different types of love. You love me like a friend, a sister, a comrade…”

“And then are is also the type between…”

He said this as she was trying to put her mug on the table but, uncharacteristically, the mug fumbled, spilling all over the table. “Shit.” The hot tea burned her hands and Mulder was already rushing back into her kitchen, grabbing towels and the ice pack. “Mulder…”

“I got it.”

He quickly cleaned up the mess and Scully took the extra towels. She wiped the mess off her hands and frowned at the red swelling starting on her knuckles. Mulder wrapped the ice pack in another towel and took her hands. “Mulder.”

“I gotcha, Scully.”

“Mulder, I’m fine.”

“Will you just let me?” The sharpness of his voice silenced her as he took her hands gently and held the ice pack against it. “I know you want to be this badass FBI agent…”

“Want to?”

“I know you are a big, badass FBI agent. Just let me for once?”

“Fine.”

They sat in silence as Mulder held the ice pack over the top of her hands. She cleared her throat. “I meant what I said, Scully. I do love you.”

She scoffed. “I’m sure.”

“You aren’t a replacement.”

Scully shook her head, refusing to believe him. “You always do this.”

“Do what?”

“Twist words.” She tried to pull her hands away from him without success. “Mulder, let me go.”

She felt Mulder squeeze her fingers tighter. “No.” He was staring at her. Those goddamn— “Look at me, Scully.”

Why did she feel tears in her eyes? Her eyes did feel dry from lack of sleep. “No.”

“Why not?”

“I’m sick of the lies.” She rested her chin on her chest. “I’m tired of the smoke and shadows. For once, I just want someone to tell me the truth and mean it.”

Mulder sighed. She winced hearing it. “What do you want me to do, Scully?”

“Tell me the truth.” She looked

“I am.” He removed the ice pack and kissed her knuckles. “I love you. You aren’t a replacement. Nothing could replace you.”

“Then what am I to you?”

“You’re Scully.” He looked at her as if that was even a question. “When it came to Samantha, I was able to live with it. I have for 27 years. But when I lost you on Skyline mountain…” Mulder put the ice pack back on her knuckles. “I couldn’t...I didn’t know what to do. I was filled with such rage. I almost killed Duane Barry. The months during your absence, I didn’t do so well.”

Scully watched him. “You rarely talk about it.”

“Because there isn’t too much to say. I took a couple of profiling cases. Coming back to the basement office—it didn’t feel the same. It wasn’t the same.” He nodded to the small gold cross on her neck. “I wore your cross when you were gone.”

She remained quiet.

He snorted derision and looked down at their hands. “It’s stupid. There was a point, right after you came back, that X wanted me to just take a plane ticket and leave you and forget everything. You. The x-files. The shadowy men without names. Everything.” He adjusted the ice pack. “And maybe, at one time I would, but not when it came to you.”

“Do you know why seeing run off with Agent Fowley hurt me?”

“Why?”

“It’s our work,” she specified, emphasizing the word ‘our.’ “She comes out of the woodwork and, all of the sudden, I take the backseat on this. I thought it was my science that kept you honest, Mulder.”

“Your science does,” he quickly caught himself, “quit twisting my words.”

“I’m not. My hands are fine, Mulder.”

“I guess they are.” He pulled back the ice and Scully flexed her numb hands. “Do you want another cup of tea?”

“Yes, please.”

“I left you with Gibson because I know he would be safer with you rather than Diana.”

“Yet, I still lost him.”

“No. He was at the nuclear facility. I have a hunch he is safe.” Mulder looked over his shoulder. “How generous, Special Agent Doctor?”

“Shut up. Make it a generous one.”

Mulder smiled and called, “Did you know I was a bartender for a couple of months in Oxford?” Scully’s mind was trying to reel with everything that was happening. But she forced her insecurities into the backseat and let Mulder take the lead. He frowned “If I were just here for something else, we’d be halfway across the country right now.”

“I don’t know if that is a good or bad thing, Mulder.” Scully watched the tv, flinching at a particularly gory scene with a face hugger. “Do you have nightmares?”

“Hm?” Mulder shrugged with his back to her. “Sometimes. That’s one of the reasons why I don’t sleep.”

Scully was quiet as Mulder returned to her with a new mug of hot Chai tea. She took it and sipped the mug. “Good. Thank you.”

“And for the record, Scully, the nightmares aren’t just of Samantha. It’s you too.”

She closed her eyes, annoyed with this vein of conversation. “Is that why you decided to profess your undying love?”

“I thought it was a good moment. But that’s not all of it.” Mulder rejoined her on the couch. “Are you ready to talk about that?”

“I still think you’re full of shit.”

He laughed and sipped his hot toddy. “That’s why my eyes are brown.”

“Hazel.”

“I’m only half full of shit then.”

Scully snorted into her drink. “I honestly don’t know what to believe.”

“I want to believe,” Mulder teased in a fake E.T. voice. She snickered playfully and slapped his thighs. “See? Made you smile. Careful. It might stay that way, Scully.”

“Shut up.”

“Okay,” he said. He checked his watch. “It is almost 4:30 am, Agent Scully. Your guest is intoxicated. What are you going to do?”

“I thought we were having a sleepover?”

“Did I say that?”

“You’re words, not mine.”

“At least take off your shoes.”

She heard Mulder kick them off and he grabbed the remote. He changed the tv to the Sports Channel. After seeing raise a questioning eyebrow, he shrugged. “So, do you watch Sports Center or a movie to fall asleep to?”

“What happened to Truth or Dare?”

“Okay, truth, or dare?”

“Dare,” she said.

“I dare you to have a sleepover on your couch.” That eyebrow. “Just...whatever we are, Scully.”

After a few moments of hesitation, she nodded. Scully felt him squeeze her hands and smile. She stood still like a painting. He smiled at her and she forced herself to return it. Mulder unwound her like a knotted piece of string and lounged himself. Despite their height differences and oppositeness, they still were made for each other. Scully found herself curling up next to him as he grabbed the remote and changing it to a 4 am playing of ‘Mystery Science Theatre 3000.’ Mulder grabbed a knitted, over large Afghan from the back of her couch to tuck around them.

“What does this say to you, Agent Mulder?”

“I love you,” he whispered. He said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “And I tell you without hesitation.”

Scully was quiet. “Why did you come here again?”

“There’s nowhere else where I would rather be.”

“Good enough for now.”

Scully quickly ran through possible scenarios. What did she have to lose? Everything. “This won’t change anything.”

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t want to lose us,” she replied cautiously.

“This will change nothing. If not, only for the better.”

She wisely chose not to say anything. She tried to relax but she shook her head. She pushed away towards the other end of the couch. There was a visible look of hurt on his face. “It’s not you,” she replied quickly.

“Yeah, I’ve heard it before. It’s me.”

“For once, it’s is me, Mulder. I can’t...I can’t get past my insecurities.”

“What insecurities?”

She ghosted him a smile. “The hallway? Either we have really bad timing or bees don’t like us.”

“Or?”

“You mentioned it earlier. I don’t want to be a replacement for Samantha or her…”

“Her?” It took a moment for Mulder to recognize what she was telling him. “Why do you say that?”

“I overheard what you said to Arizona. She’s staying on the x-files because it’s the best way to represent your interests. Before that, when we still had the office, I caught you all holding hands. She seemed so excited about something. That is when I called you. I told you I was driving back. I was just sitting in the car in the garage outside.”

“Watching in the shadows?” Mulder sighed. “Scully…”

“I feel like I’ve been on the outside a lot lately.” She sipped her hot toddy, the alcohol burning in the back of her throat. “So I can’t help but feel somewhat insecure. Just talking about it…” She snorted into her mug of tea. “It’s taking a lot.”

“I can understand that.”

“Do you?”

He hesitated. “I...like to think so.” Mulder leaned forward. “I know things have been tough. Honestly, I’m surprised you’re still here.”

She titled her head in question. “What do you mean?”

“I thought that you have left. Maybe try to go back to Quantico or quit the FBI all together.”

“I almost did that night when they told me Salt Lake City. But you’re my partner, Mulder. It’s as simple as that.”

He took her free hand and entwined their fingers. “And for that, I am grateful for that of every moment of every day. Do you want to know the difference between you and her?”

“Our heights?”

Mulder snorted in muted laughter. “I guess, physically, but where it counts, you tower above her.”

She arched a skeptical eyebrow.

“She left me. No warning or note. Just up and left. I haven’t been in contact with her since she left. She wouldn’t have chased me like you have or been thrown in contempt of Congress for lying to save my ass.” Scully smiled as she looked down. “She wouldn’t have thrown everything out the window to deal with her crazy partner. You are so much more than she was, or is, Scully.” He brushed her hair out of her face. “And I have never loved anyone more than I love you. Truth. I meant what I said in that hospital. I love you.”

“You really overcomplicate things.”

Mulder shrugged and grinned. “So, Scully, where does this leave us?”

The insecurities raged inside her and she averted her gaze. “I’ve had nightmares about this too,” she said softly.

“Why does it always feel like we are watching from the shadows?” He asked her softly. “Especially in our nightmares? We feel like we don’t have control?”

“I don’t know. I thought you were supposed to be the psychologist?”

“It was rhetorical.”

“I know.” She sighed and looked at the tv for a distraction. “After all we’ve been through, Mulder…”

“What about it?”

“I do love you.” She said as quickly exhaled so it came out in a jumble of words. Scully doubted he had heard her. But his playful grin suggested otherwise. “You heard it?”

“Ears like a fox.”

Mulder bent forward again to kiss her again, forgoing all shyness. She felt him bring her closer, snaking his arms around her. He sighed audibly before she returned it with much gusto. Senses alight for both of them, Scully managed to be the level headed one between them both. “Mulder,” she breathed. “I hardly think this is the place?”

He pulled back and blinked in confusion. His senses were drunk off her that it was heard from him to make sense. “What?”

“I don’t think the couch Is the best place for this.”

“Why?”

He was only now capable of single-word answers and questions. She smiled. She felt lighter. The nightmares that had plagued the back of her mind for months now seemed like a distant memory. “Just because.”

It seemed like she was incapable of speaking too. She pushed the Afgan aside and got to her feet. The cups were forgotten and Mulder clicked off the television. Words failed them but their unspoken communication did otherwise. He took her hand and squeezed. “Are you certain?”

“No,” she admitted truthfully, “but I know what I feel. I’ve learned to trust my instincts.”

Mulder smiled. She led him to her bedroom. She kept the lamp near her bed on and he looked at her tossed sheets. He exhaled, letting out a heavy sigh. “I wish you would have told me sooner.”

“What would you have done, Mulder?”

“Acted sooner.”

“Well, you’re here now, right?”

“Of course. You haven’t kicked me out yet.”

“I’m not planning to.”

Scully took his hands and pulled him closer. She felt emboldened and the room felt hotter than it was. He smiled. “So…” She grabbed him by the scruff of his t-shirt and pulled him downwards. Mulder’s spine protested but he didn’t care. Let Scully take the lead. His arms reached downwards to bring her closer. Suddenly, she felt frozen. Just a second ago she had felt so confident. Now, she was unsure. “What’s wrong?”

“Are you certain about this?” Her voice was soft but the lingering hesitation could be heard. “About this thing between us?”

“Yes, I’m more certain than anything else.”

“Okay.” There was another pause. “So...how do we do this?”

“We just do,” he laughed.

She shook her head and said, “Isn’t this better than a stakeout, watching in the shadows for some would-be informant, and then finding out it was a waste of time.”

“Scully, are you proposing role-playing?”

“No. It’s just…” She laughed despite herself. “I never imagined this.”

“Are you certain you want to go through with this? You don’t have to if you’re…”

“No, I want this.”

Mulder kissed her softly at first but deepened it. He walked her backward to her bed until she bumped up against it. Mulder smiled as pushed her to sit down. “It’s, uh, been a while.”

“Same.”

He sat next to her and laughed. “I expected this to be different.”

“What do you mean?”

“We’re going to do this, aren’t we? I expected it to be a bit more...fevered? And look at us, like two scared virgins.”

Scully laughed. “So, Mulder, do you want me to take the lead?”

He rolled his eyes. “Or we can just go back to watching TV. I’m sorry. I guess it’s the sleep deprivation talking.”

“We aren’t watching TV. I thought we were having a sleepover. At some point, we do have to sleep.” She got to her knees and pushed him onto his back. “Besides, Mulder, we’ve come this far. When have we ever done anything halfway?”

“What have you done with Dana Scully?”

“Invasion of the body snatchers?”

Scully felt her courage return. She swung her leg over his hip and straddled him. “Now, correct me if I’m wrong but I don’t remember this being a part of a sleepover.”

“Well, it’s a thing between partners, right?”

She slid lower, squeezing her thighs in the process. He grunted in response. “Right. I’m not complaining by the way. I was just stating.”

She hummed. She was alight was all new sensations. Mulder let his hands drop to her waist. “I like those pajamas by the way. It’s not silk for once.”

“Cotton.”

“Huh.”

“My mom says…”

He couldn’t take it anymore. “I don’t care what your mother said.”

His long arms twisted around her and pulled her down. She braced herself, sticking her hands out on either side of his head to brace the impact. She collided into an Earth-shattering kiss. Stranger thing how time and physics worked. She sighed happily as her tongue delved into his mouth. This was good. “This is wonderful,” she whispered between breaths.

“Do you know what makes this better?”

“What?”

“Give me some control?” She paused. “Do you trust me, Scully?

“Yes.”

He smiled. “You know that you’re the only one I trust, right?”

“Do you?”

Instead of answering her, he skillfully changed their positions so she was laying on her back and he was laying on her side. His left hand carefully undid the button down her pajama top. She breathed sharply at the first contact of his fingertips caressing the swell of her breast. “I do.” He watched her thoughtfully. “You see, before you...I had a few partners. They came and went. It was like they wanted nothing to do with me. But you...you challenged me, you made me better. I can’t place the exact moment but it may have been laughing with you in that graveyard in Oregon at five o’clock in the morning.”

She hissed at his touches. “That was nearly six years ago.”

“So, I like a slow burn. I have never felt this way about anyone except you.” She laughed but she bit her lips to keep herself from crying out. “What?”

“Nothing.”

“Do your nightmares involve this, Scully?”

“I don’t let myself indulge in such fantasies.”

“Why not?”

He was growing bolder with his explorations. She sighed and closed her eyes. “Lately, with everything, I don’t know.”

“What do you say we change that?”

He bent down to kiss her again and pushed up on her top. He wasn’t rushing nor did she mean his slow advances. Soon, she found herself growing restless. “Mulder?”

“Hmmm?”

“Enough of this. Let’s finish this.”

This is not how neither one of them imagined things. Scully had it imagined it fast and quick after the turmoil from a case. Mulder, on the other hand, imagined it slow after one night of verbally sparing with one another. Who needed guidance when you had your better half?

The lamp remained on. There was no hiding from this. Six years of tension resolved.

The clothes were peeled artfully like it was nothing new. She laughed between their kisses. “At least I don’t have to save you this time.”

He suckled her hungrily. “You already did. A long time ago.”

Mulder reached to turn out the light on her nightstand and Scully grabbed his wrist, stopping him. “No, leave it on.”

The first time was always awkward. They both remembered being told that my friends when they were teenagers. “I expected this to be different,” he admitted.

“Mulder, shut up.”

“This has got to be a sleepover for the record books.”

At the clock turned 5:00 and the red numbers faded against the lamplight, Mulder continued. Clothes were shed, and they crawled beneath the covers. The fire ignited and fears were extinguished. Gone was the cold that plagued the nightmares and shadows that kept them in hiding. Their bodies entwined, just as their souls had been for years.

Their ecstasy came to a crescendo as Scully felt her last orgasm leave her and Mulder followed soon after. He was laughing as he rolled off to the side and she grinned like a fool. He started to laugh too and any tension that remained fade as she came down from her high.

“Well, I certainly don’t remember sleepovers being like that,” he remarked.

Scully could hear the fatigue in his voice, finally evident from someone who had not slept in over 24 hours. She smiled goofily and nodded toward the window. “The sun is coming up.”

“How can you tell?”

“It’s summer and during that time, the sun comes through the window sometimes. It’s been so long. I can’t remember the last time I stayed in bed this late.”

“We haven’t been here that late.” He yawned and pulled her closer. “Where are you going?”

“Give me a sec.”

She reached to turn out the light and moved to get out of bed. “Where do you think you’re going? And why did you turn out the light?”

“Because, Mulder, this is supposed to be a sleepover,” she said, “and we need to sleep.”

“And based on what scientific evidence?”

“I’m a doctor.”

He watched her jog nude across the bedroom in the dark shadows to open up the blinds slightly to let in the morning light. She rushed back to bed. “Oh, your cold,” he complained.

“Knock it off.”

Scully reclaimed her spot next to him. They both turned beneath the covers to face the newly opened blinds as the early morning light began to shine through. “No more shadows, Scully.”

“No more shadows.”

#xfiles #xf fic #txf #txf fic #msr #msr fic #mulder #scully #season 6 angst #ust #rst

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danadeservesadrink · 4 years

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Wine and Whiskey

Read on AO3 here

Chapter 1: Mulder’s POV

Scully arrives at his apartment with a bottle of wine on a Friday night and Mulder can't refuse. There's something so tempting about drinking wine from the bottle.

We’re just going to pretend that I didn’t wait almost a year to publish the second chapter for this fic. Reposting the first chapter here because I gave her a good fix-up. Tagging @today-in-fic

He had never been more mesmerized in his life than by Dana Scully drinking wine from the bottle.

She had shown up at his apartment holding it, bashfully admitting that she didn’t want to drink alone on a Friday night, practically entrapping him with a bat of her eyelashes. Of course he let her in.

It was rare that she let her guard down like this, but you wouldn’t catch him complaining. He ushered her in with a hand on her lower back and she made herself comfortable on his couch, flipping through the channels until she landed on a rerun of some history documentary. Her energy was palpable, nervous and confident and radiating. She gazed up at him with something just short of confidence and requested a corkscrew. Who was he to deny her.

Dana Scully sat on his couch in her maroon sweater and blue jeans on a Friday night at 9:06 pm and uncorked a bottle of white wine and he had never been more in love. Correction, he was more in love with her at 9:07 when she took a swig straight from the bottle. She drank and then let out a deep sigh, filled with all of the troubles of a not-so-9-to-5 FBI agent. He sat down opposite of her on the couch, matching her cross-legged position, and stared at her, mesmerized. She must have noticed, as she flushed and chuckled to herself, likely at the genuine absurdity of the situation.

“I’ve had a very long day,” she whispered defensively. He didn’t mind. She deserved to unwind. She passed him the bottle with a raised eyebrow and he almost denied.Thinking about how her lips and his would be touching the same lip of a bottle made him feel like a school boy analyzing the physics of cooties. He almost offered to go get them glasses, but she pushed the bottle towards him with an insistent smirk and he realized he was being ridiculous. He accepted, although still subtly trying to turn the bottle in a feeble attempt to avoid drinking from the same location she had, and he drank.

“Wanna talk about it?” he asked, wiping his mouth with the sleeve of his sweater. The wine was sweet, its flavor lingering on his lips.

“Bill’s an ass” She said, rolling her eyes. She reached out a hand for the bottle back, and he passed it over. She brought the bottle to her lips again with no rotations, clearly unconcerned with the dynamics of indirect kissing.

“Yea he is. What’d he do this time”. His previous attempt to forget how perfect she looked as she drank was a failure. Because Dana Scully was on his couch drinking wine from the bottle. He doesn't think any sane person could ever forget that.

“Called me up today to tell me how disappointed he was with me. How I’m a failure to our family and how I’m putting myself in danger for absolutely no reason” She laughed at this, and so did he, reveling in the ridiculousness of their day jobs. He shifted closer on the couch and she must have felt his concern because she clarified. “He heard about the case”.

Of course. Scully took down a murderer, a serial killer at that, with her own two hands, fighting through a warehouse of traps to get to him, to catch the bad guy. She shot him with his own gun but not before he sliced a nasty gash into her side with a pocket knife. All while he’d been knocked out on the cold cement in a pile of his own vomit. She followed his profile, found the warehouse, and took the bastard down and he was so god damn proud of her. Bill didn’t see it but he sure as hell could.

“Bill’s an idiot” He said so sincerely it made her look up from staring into the wine.

“Yea. Yea he is” She whispered. She took another drink, and he was moving closer to her on the already small couch, like a moth to the light.

She’s so pretty. The way the TV fluorescence bounced off of her cheek, the way her hair was tied up but the short pieces in the front whisped around her face in perfect little curls. It took all of his strength not to reach over and brush one away from her eye when she tilted her head back to take another drink from the bottle. Her neck was perfect porcelain, he dreamed of running his lips over the smooth skin she exposed. When she finishes, he forces himself to look at the TV screen instead of the little drop of white wine remaining on her lip.

She looks down at the bottle, then up at him through her lashes. She was coy, vulnerable, he knew this step, whatever it was, was big. Scully had shown up to his apartment before, but it was usually due to work. Showing up with wine and personal feeling was teetering on the edge of something more than partnership. His eyes flick down to the bottle and she offers it to him. Their fingertips brush and he shudders. He sees her watching him drink.

They are rudely interrupted by the shrill ringtone of her cell phone.

She pulls it out of her pocket with a sigh, and he smirks.

“Hi Mom.” He hears the muted voice of Maggie Scully on the other end of the phone. She’s probably calling to apologize for her son’s behavior, and he’s pissed that she’s forced into that position.

“Well he was acting like a bastard!” Scully exclaimed, frustrated, and Mulder couldn’t help but laugh out loud. Scully shot him a glare, and he quickly pressed his lips together in silent surrender. She seems to be listening intently, so he shakes the wine bottle in her direction, forcing her to wave him off with an eye roll. As she mumbles “mmhmm” and “uh huh” he becomes bolder, eventually leaning over and trying to press the wine bottle to her lips. She pushed him back with a smirk, but reached for the bottle and took a drink before her next answer. It was his turn to smirk.

“I’m over at Mulder’s place” He grinned at her and tried to scoot in closer to hear Maggie’s response. She pushed him back again, this time with a softer smile.

“Work stuff” she said, avoiding eye contact with him. The irony of her statement was not lost, and he tried to repress the laugh that bubbled up within him. He caught her blushing.

“I’ll let him know. Bye Mom” She quickly hung up the phone and proceeded to drink a good 6 swigs before handing the bottle back to him, shameless. He hadn’t realized it was almost empty.

The concept of Dana Scully, the Catholic raised and pant-suit wearing professional, drinking wine at a man’s apartment at night while on the phone with her equally proper mother made him chuckle. He wonders if this is the first time she’s done this.

“What did your mom want to tell me?” he asked with a grin. She blushed again. He couldn’t tell if she was embarrassed or if the wine was getting to her. Maybe both.

“She just wanted to say hi” she glanced at the bottle in his hands, avoiding his eyes. He let the little white lie slip past them as a gift to a friend. “You gonna finish that?”

He shook his head. He was worried that any more and he would start acting in ways that would make Maggie Scully very disappointed.

Scully pouted at his response, but leaned even closer to him, grabbed the bottle, and downed the rest of it, tilting her head all the way back to allow the last drops to trickle from the bottom of the bottle into her throat. Something about her throat made him want to mark it with his teeth. Jesus, the effect she had on him was insane.

She finished, and returned to gazing in his eyes with an impish smirk. He must have still been staring because she burst into a fit of giggles. Despite all the Irish blood in her, Scully was still a small woman who had just drank nearly a full bottle of wine.

“Scully are you drunk?” He teased. She burst into another fit of giggles as she shook her head, still smiling like the cat that ate the canary. He loved the sound of her laugh. He never wanted it to stop. He would personally fight every demon in this world so that she never had to stop smiling at him like she was right now.

She felt loose, unrestrained, and so did he. They were so comfortable with each other in the strangest of ways, and this wine laden journey was just another layer. Intimacy for them often came in small touches and promises of protection, least of all through physical affection. But tonight, all bets were off, as Dana Scully, goddess in blue jeans, used his shoulder to push herself off his couch and waltzed into his kitchen, swaying her hips like the little vixen she was.

“Where you going?” He called after her, but the only reply was the sound of a cabinet being opened and the melodious giggle he had come to adore.

She was reaching for the top shelf when he walked in the kitchen behind her. Her prize was obvious. Striding up behind her he placed one hand on her hip and reached with the other for the half full bottle of whiskey her outstretched fingers were wiggling towards.

He almost dropped it when he felt her step back into him. He flexed the hand still fixed to her hip as he felt a shiver run through him. As quickly as she came, however, she was gone, instead turning around to grab at the bottle he was holding. He reacted quicker, sober reflexes triumphing over hers, pulling it back and raising an eyebrow in response to her pouty lips. Drunk Scully was a dangerous creature, a tempting siren who could bend any man to her will. All he wanted was to please her.

“And why should I give you some of my emergency whiskey?”, he teased.

“Because I’ve had a terrible day, and now I’m out of wine”. She had to know what she was doing to him. Looking him straight in the eye, pushing her lip out even further. He rolled his eyes, laughing again under his breath.

“What’s the magic word”

And oh Dana you know how to make a man give you anything. There is no magic word, only Scully tilting her head back, closing her eyes, and opening her mouth, tongue stuck out and waiting. The vision was enthralling.

She peeked an eye open when she heard him toss the cap on the counter, but closed it again with a giggle when she realized he had caught her. He shook his head, exhaling softly. With reverence, he gave her what she wished.

The whiskey hit her tongue with a burn of ice and fire, and he watched as it slid down into her mouth, filling her up until he stopped pouring, and she swallowed. He had never wished to be a liquid before. She coughed before smiling up at him, eyes sparkling even though the closest light was now the television.

“Your turn” She smirked and took the bottle from his hands.

“I don’t think you can reach” he countered, but she grabbed a fistful of his shirt and pulled down.

He would never deny her.

He got down on his knees on his kitchen floor, and it was only right that Scully should be the altar he prayed to. Still smirking, he first closed his eyes as she had, then stuck out his tongue to await the drink of his goddess. She poured sloppily, the hand of a distracted woman, and he had to swallow before she was finished, causing her to spill some on his lips and chin.

He opened his eyes to see her giggle, mumble an apology, and lean over him. He barely registered what was happening before he felt her tongue, that perfect tongue, lap up a stray drop off of his cheek. He gasped, sharply. She pulled back, only a few inches, still leaning over him. He gazed up into her eyes and saw his arousal mirrored in them.

“It’s your emergency whiskey, I didn’t want to waste it.” She smirked her perfect lips as she whispered. Her breath smelled like sweet wine and sharp whiskey. It was intoxicating. He closed his eyes as he felt her finger raise his chin to the heavens. She licked again, this one on his jawline, and he moaned. He felt her laughter in puffs of air on his cheek.

“Scully…” he whispers, a halfhearted attempt to salvage a professional partnership he knew had been tossed out of the window the second she walked in tonight.

She ran a finger over his lips to silence him and he thought he might black out.

All he wants is her. His body shakes with the thought.

She brings both hands to cup his cheeks, whiskey bottle long forgotten, and presses her lips to his.

The feeling is that of resurrection. It’s an electric shock coursing through his body, lighting every nerve he has on fire, his thoughts only attuned to her, her, her. He remembers he has hands, and uses them to pull her closer, cupping the back of her neck with ferocity. She opens her mouth and he tastes her tongue. The taste of salvation and moscato.

He breaks the kiss only to rise up to his full height before he descends upon her, grabbing her gently by the waist, still mindful of her injury, but equally desperate. She tangles a hand into his hair and pulls him into her. He could get lost in her mouth, following the flow of the whiskey before him, lips then tongue, fire and ice. She moaned into his mouth and he tightened his grip on her. His mouth traced the path his eyes had followed earlier. Off the curve of her lips, down to her jawline, where he licked and sucked and did everything in his power to remember the taste of her skin. She whimpered when he reached her pulse point, taking the fist in his hair and desperately pressing him against it. He nipped at her flesh, and then kissed it better.

“Fuck” she drew out, shaking, and it made him wild. He sucked harder, knowing full well the dark purple bruise it was going to leave. Both of them couldn’t give a shit. When he finished, he kissed his way up to her ear.

“Mine” he growled, and she shuddered in his arms. He carefully tugged on her earlobe with his teeth as he felt her nod against him.

“Yours” she whispered back. It was all the permission he needed.

He carefully traced his fingers up her sides, dragging the fabric of her top along with it. Her chest was heaving, their breaths mixing together in a cocktail of arousal and alcohol. He felt the bandage covering the wound from the warehouse and a pang of guilt passed over him. She sees it in his eyes and uses her own hands to push his higher, past the evidence of their last foul memory. He reached up to the bottom of her breasts and with a shock realized that her sweater had been hiding a secret.

“Were you planning…” he dotted her collarbone with marks from his lips, sucking softly along each delicate curve “... on telling me…” another kiss “...that you weren't wearing a bra?” kiss , kiss , kiss .

“I was more hoping that … ah shit...you would find out for yourself”

He had to be dreaming. Any minute he would wake up in his bed horny and alone like every Saturday. But then she kissed him again and he figured that if this was a dream he hoped he was fucking comatose because he never wanted to wake up. He traced his hands over the underside of her breasts again and felt her body shake at his caress. Quickly he pushed the sweater up and over her head, careful to not disturb her bandage, her arms raising to help. And then she was topless in his kitchen on a Friday night and he was going to study her like she was a sculptor and she was his Venus. He would memorize every curve of her perfect body with his hands over and over and over.

“Well?”

He had been staring. How could you not when Dana fucking Scully was blushing and breathless in your arms. But there would be time for starting later. He turned his mind to devouring her.

He palmed her breast and kneaded, watching in awe as her head fell backward and a sigh escaped her lips. He asked for permission through a silent question tossed up at her and she nodded a desperate nod. His lips continued their trail downward, licking and sucking on the hills and valleys of her chest until he came to her nipple, where he paused to circle it with his tongue. At the same time he flicked her right nipple he took the left one into her mouth. Her head shot forward, the hand in his hair pulled him forward into her, and she let out the most guttural moan of “ Mulder ”. His name had never sounded more perfect than when it came out of her mouth. He spent some time there, licking and sucking, pulling with his teeth then soothing with his tongue, just trying to get her to make different sounds. Curses flew from her mouth with ease and he was reminded of the rebellious streak in her. The deviant Dana Scully that cursed and drank and fucked. He loved this side of her. He’s drunk off of her and whiskey and wine and he can only think that he needed more. His brain is buzzing and he’s sure he didn’t have that much wine but maybe it's just the smell of her skin that's so intoxicating.

“Mulder I need you”

He looked up to meet her eyes and saw her staring back at him, breathless and hungry.

“Now.”

#thanks for dealing with my writers block on this one #also I can't write smut so I just don't #msr #msr fanfiction #txf fanfic #the x files #dana scully #fox mulder #sam writes

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sepublic · 4 years

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Covention Revelations!

Okay, so the biggest thing that sticks out to me is that Witches are essentially encouraged, if not outright required by society to join a coven. A coven is essentially a ‘club’ where you gain membership and a sense of belonging, but in return you get restricted to only a particular type of magic and have to specialize in it.

(Jeez, now Willow’s predicament in her debut is worse knowing that once she reaches a certain age, she’d have no longer been able to perform plant magic. Thank goodness for Luz!)

These rules are enforced by the Emperor, who has his own personal coven of witches that can use all forms of magic, but just so happen to report directly to him. What a surprise...

From a world-building perspective, I can see why this is a rule. If everyone had access to every form of magic... Well, I could see certain people viewing that as chaotic and a society impossible to control. And anyone with the title of Emperor presumably is used to having a LOT of power and authority over people’s lives. It certainly re-contextualizes what Eda (or should I say, Edaline... Edalyn?) had to say about her disdain of magic school. How schools teach you to do it a ‘proper’ way, but in her eye it’s wild, uncontrollable, unpredictable. It’s literally a system that -maybe even permanently- dictates exactly what you can do with magic.

If I had to compare it to another show, it’s like Homeworld from Steven Universe. Everybody has to have a set role, because every society has specific requirements (some more important than others... sorry Tiny Cat Coven). Everyone having access to every form of magic is chaotic and hard to control. Ergo, establish a school system that encourages people to focus on a particular subset of magic, the one they happen to be the best at, and then have that witch focus on that single role for the rest of their lives. That way, everyone who’s doing a certain job in society happens to be the best one most suited towards it.

(At least ideally- Willow was pressured to be in the Abomination track despite her skill with plant magic. Luckily, Principal Bump recognized her talent, but it makes me wonder if there are ever shortages of witches for certain covens? Could this lead to pressure from parents to want their children to seize an open opportunity for an established role in society?)

Also, I like Lilith (Yes it’s one L, I checked the end credits)! Yeah, she’s mean, but she’s not heartless, and her and Eda’s conflict is like Stan and Ford’s, namely one is a troublemaker who’s unorthodox while the other is very proper and all about being the best at something. They’re at odds, but not to an extreme degree- They’ll squabble and get in trouble with one another but they don’t seem to seriously want the other one hurt.

There are many moments where Lilith is genuinely excited to invite Eda to the Emperor’s Coven, and her stopping her attack for Eda’s curse shows a bit. And despite being required to arrest Eda, she never once makes any moves to do so- She even goes against this mission by removing the Wanted Posters for the sake of the duel. And not once in said duels does she ever dictate a term of having Eda turn herself in. We know at the end that Lilith is tasked with arresting Eda... but in all seriousness, for whatever antagonism the two siblings have with one another, it seems that Lilith is low-key complicit in Eda’s continued escapes from the law.

Also worth noting;

-Willow and Gus! I didn’t expect to see them here but I love it! Also Gus is confirmed to specialize in illusions!

-That pen given to King by the... Scrying Coven, was it? It was a Coven involved with telling the future... We didn’t see it do anything. While it could just be a joke that she SAYS it’ll do something but she’s just lying and trying to dump merch onto him, it does make me wonder...

-We see the Abomination Teacher at the coliseum, as well as the Snaggleback! The teacher is missing his abomination and the Snaggleback either got back his shell or grew a new one, I can’t tell which.

-Amity Blight! I’m sure others saw it coming as well, but it’s neat to see that she’s a person who’s clearly very concerned about proving one’s worth, and while that means she can use her hard work and progress as a justification for looking down on others, it’s not a double standard either. If she fails, then as far as Amity is concerned, she deserved to fail. I wonder if she wants to be in the Emperor’s Coven so she can practice all magic, or simply because it’s for the best- Maybe both. Either way I liked that neat foreshadowing of Amity being surprised at her Abomination’s size in the duel, hinting at Lilith adding the power amplifier.

-Also, I love how Eda and Lilith at first look like they may have a serious feud... But then quickly it just dissolves into petty, immature jabs and it’s clear that their antagonism isn’t legitimately serious. At least, not for now- Pressure by the emperor may cause Lilith to act more seriously, perhaps.

-I still can’t tell if King is lying or not about the whole ‘King of Demons’ backstory. It was part of his official description but now it seems like it’s just a fanciful lie he likes to make up? It’d be hilarious if later on it’s revealed that, yes, he really WAS the King of Demons and everyone is surprised because they thought he was making that up. Or maybe only Luz is surprise, who knows? Top-tier, late-game casual reveal would be King mentioning he was once called Bill Cipher.

-DANA GOING SUPER SAIYAN

-I know just yesterday I was gushing about Willuz, but honestly Luzity has gained its canon appeal. I love how Luz, after seeing how upset Amity was, didn’t just ignore her predicament but actively went out of her way to make sure she was okay. It was sweet to see Luz acknowledge that, yeah, she didn’t mean to embarrass Amity back in Episode 3 and felt bad about it (as I speculated earlier). Obviously neither party is at fault here, no one really is... But I love to see Luz’s compassionate nature resonate from her looking at things from other points of view. And seeing Amity willing to give Luz some pointers on Magic was just so sweet...

-Small and obvious joke, but Luz invoking Azura’s challenge to Hecate happening at the Bog of “Immediate Regret” was too funny to me.

-I love how they’re now lampshading Eda’s mysterious past and she’s just all for it. Teasing Luz about it. In general I just love Eda’s troll-ish nature. When she brought up her curse at the end of the duel I wasn’t sure at first if she was being genuine or just faking out Lilith. I love her.

#the owl house #owl house #covention #the owl house eda #the owl house luz #the owl house lilith #the owl house king #the owl house willow #amity blight #luz noceda #analysis #speculation

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comicchats · 4 years

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Batfam headcanons that I have for no particular reason except that they make sense in my head

Jason and Dick constantly argue about how terrible Brice was to them as Robins, meanwhile, Cass, Steph and Tim are like 'He smiled to you?' 'He encouraged you to have lives outside of being vigilantes as well?' 'WhAt???' 'He actually gave you presents for your birthdays instead of ignoring it?'

Dick and Bruce tried to give Damian the talk. Damian ran off and ended up hiding at Tim's. They still insult each other, but they don't mean it as much anymore.

Literally none of the bats are straight, they're all either gay or bi and because of that, all of their costumes are covered in pride colours during June.

Dick was VERY obvious and on the nose about it even before coming out to Bruce. To the point where Bruce just assumed Dick had decided not to make a big deal out of coming out.

Dick would have come out earlier, had he not needed 3 months to prepare for the confetti spectacle that his official coming out was.

Jason came out by getting caught kissing a boy at school and getting in detention for skipping class. Bruce took him to get ice cream.

Tim's coming out took a while as he was REALLY good at keeping his lives separate and he didn't want Jack Drake to find out. He came out to Dana first, and later he decided to just casually mention it on patrol that that conversation had gone well in the hopes that no one would make a big deal out of it. They all broke off patroll earlier to get pie.

Damian just came out as gay by responding to Dick's teasing about getting a girl with a flat 'I'm not interested, I am gay.' and tryung to off. There was a group hug that stopped him from doing so. Damian did not protest as loud as usual.

Jason, Steph, Duke and Tim totally have movie nights together.

Dick forces the entire family to go out ice skating at least once a year.

Somehow, and nobody really knows how, Tim ended up being the one invited to Damians parent teacher conferences. (Bruce always missed the schools calls, and Dick forgot to give up his number)

As a result, Tim finds out how truly talented Damian is at drawing and signs the boy up for classes. "I don't care what Bruce says now, maintaining a civillian life is important, and you can learn to make important contacts by social interraction. It WILL bring you further in life"

(Tim finds out that by channeling is mother, it's much easier to convince Damian.)

And yes, on "Bring your child to work day" Damian spends his morning with Dick in the precinct, and the afternoon at WE at Tim's office, because what Bruce does cannot be called work.

Jason refuses to admit he's acting like an older brother when he watches Damian and Tim on patroll and makes sure that neither of them collaps.

Dick just laughs.

Duke and Barbara spend half their time betting on what stupid things the rest will do that day. They usually end up tied.

Steph and Tam, to Tim's utter horror, are in contact with each other and tend to conspire against him to get him to sleep.

Babs often helps the two girls.

Cass and Jason often spend time together on patrol or just in downtime. They work surprisingly well together, and both of them are fully comfortable just being quiet.

Jason is helping Cass to learn to read.

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admiralty-xfd · 4 years

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This is chapter 7, to start at the beginning go here on A03 because linking Tumblr posts is getting difficult and I may be quarantined at home but I’m also lazy AF. Thanks for reading!

Scully didn’t really want to go over to Mulder’s after the incident in the elevator. It wasn’t that she was upset with him, or even angry at men in general. It was because she wasn’t sure how to behave.

She didn’t want to let this bother her as much as it did, but she couldn’t get the image out of her head of that man leering at her, whoever he was, presumably having either seen the videotape or heard about it. The guy was an asshole, plain and simple. But her concerns had been valid; this thing had been released into the Hoover Building like a virus, and it would spread and spread and spread until she became some person to everyone that she was not.

In any event, as much as she enjoyed proving herself correct, this was one situation in which she had no desire to.

Mulder welcomed her in, happy to see her. He poured her wine and rubbed her feet. She had the distinct impression he was trying to distract her from what had happened in Skinner’s office by being the perfect boyfriend, and she wished she was in a mood to enjoy it but she just wasn’t. He could tell.

“Scully, are you okay?” he asked her. “You’ve seemed off all night. Is this about what happened in Skinner’s office?”

He looked so concerned she almost told him about the elevator incident, but she stopped herself, perhaps out of embarrassment, perhaps out of shame. Maybe she just didn’t want his predictable protective streak to flare up. She knew what would happen next. Mulder would ask who the guy was, and when she told him she didn’t know, he’d make it his new quest to find him and beat the ever-loving shit out of him.

She didn’t want that at all. That would only draw attention to their escalating dilemma. Besides, she never wanted him to feel like he had to save her. She was no damsel in distress. She was Dana Scully.

“I’m fine,” she said, which she really should’ve known better than to say. Mulder was well aware that was code for I’m not fine.

“It’s gonna be okay, you know?” he tried to assure her. “This will all be forgotten by Monday.”

It wouldn’t, and she knew this better than Mulder ever could. His utter ignorance and helplessness broke her heart a little. But his intentions were pure, and he was trying.

“You’re right,” she said reluctantly, something she never said to Mulder when he wasn’t.

He lifted his hand to move the hair out of her face in that delicate way of his, and she smiled. “You’re really sweet, you know that?” she said. “I had no idea.”

He shrugged. “You bring it out in me.” They were quiet for a moment, just looking at each other.

“Hey Scully,” he said, breaking the silence. “You wanna go steady?”

She burst out laughing, the moment so welcomed. Her hand went to his cheek. She couldn’t love him more if she tried. “Yes, I’d like that.”

“With me, is the catch,” he grinned.

“Still yes.”

He smiled, and in his eyes she saw the hope she’d grown so fond of seeing there. It was another huge step for them, a moment that meant something. She closed her eyes and sighed, living in that moment. Maybe she couldn’t ever fully satisfy him, not really. But he still wanted to be with her. Maybe for now, it was enough.

He moved to kiss her and she flinched, just a bit, but enough for him to notice. What was that about? She wanted him to kiss her, so why was she reacting this way?

“Is this not okay?” he asked softly. She loved him so much: his tenderness, his attentiveness. She wished she’d noticed it much sooner.

“No, it’s okay,” she said. She put her arms around his neck and pulled him close, trying to focus. This is Mulder, it’s just Mulder, she told herself, and she tried to put the events of the day behind her and give him all the attention he deserved.

He kissed her softly at first, then his passion began to build as he ran his fingers through her hair. He moaned her name into her ear as he sucked on her earlobe, pulling her body into his. She could feel him getting hard against her as he unbuttoned her shirt, and while she wanted to get naked with him she didn’t want to feel vulnerable tonight.

I heard something about you.

She tried to shake off the unwelcome image of the creep in the elevator as she pulled Mulder’s T shirt up and over his head, and started pushing his pants down. She probably did it faster than she should have because he seemed to take it as a sign he wasn’t going fast enough. He scooped her up as he kicked off his pants and carried her to his bed, tossing her down on it and in a quick motion sliding her skirt down and off.

“You’re so sexy,” he mumbled as he threw her legs over his shoulders and began teasing the fabric of her panties with the tip of his tongue. She loved when he went down on her, it was her very favorite thing, but her head ragdolled from side to side in distress as Mulder’s magical tongue was conflated with images of unwanted advances.

I like what I heard.

He slid her panties down her thighs, all the way down and off, spreading her legs and returning to his task. She wanted to tell him to stop, that this was too much right now, but she couldn’t. She didn’t want him to know how much this was bothering her. So she let him finish, or at least think he finished, by faking it.

He wasn’t fooled, however, when he brought his face up next to hers to kiss her, and saw tears welling in her eyes. She’d tried to hold them in, she’d really tried.

“Scully, what’s wrong?”

She shook her head and smiled at him through her tears. She loved him, and that she didn’t have to fake.

“Nothing, Mulder,” she said, and pulled him close to her, kissing him again. “I’m fine.”

She hated lying to him. She never wanted to do it again.

That night, as Mulder slept soundly beside her, she got out of his bed quietly, put her clothes back on in his bathroom, and with one pensive look at her slumbering partner, crept out of his apartment without a sound.

***

When he woke up, she wasn’t in his arms.

The memory of last night came screaming back in snippets, as if he were drunk or had blacked out somehow. But he hadn’t had so much as a sip of the wine he’d poured for Scully, so focused he’d been on making her feel good after what had surely been a tumultuous day for her.

I’m fine, she’d said. He'd known better, even as she’d snuggled up beside him and fallen asleep.

Something was bothering her, and while he wanted to believe it was only the idea of people finding out about them, he couldn’t shake the thought that she was in some way ashamed of him, ashamed of their relationship. That she might decide at any moment none of this was worth it and end things completely.

He got up and looked around for a note or something, some sign she’d had a good reason to leave, and found nothing. His hand involuntarily went to his crotch, which was aching for the release he’d denied himself last night on account of Scully’s comfort.

He jerked off in the shower while picturing her mouth around his cock, and when he got out to towel off he felt like shit. Everything suddenly felt complicated, when surely it didn’t have to be. Scully had never objected to having her mouth around his cock; in fact, he was convinced she quite enjoyed it from the look in her eyes whenever she’d had it there.

He wrapped the towel around his waist, then planted his arms on either side of the sink as he leaned forward to look at himself in the mirror. He was so confused about what this new chapter of his life was shaping out to be. He’d spent over a decade of his life on the X-Files, sacrificed so much for his cause. Scully had sacrificed so much for his cause that it had become her own, and he couldn’t deny his own guilt about that.

He loved the way they worked together, the way she rolled her eyes at his theories but always listened. He loved sneaking around in the dark with her, even before those escapades had any romantic potential. He loved how smart she was; he could never do any of the things he accomplished without her by his side.

He loved having Scully as his partner. But he also loved having her as more.

He’d cordoned off his life surrounding Samantha into sections: the before, the during, the after. It occurred to him that he was doing the same with Scully, only he didn’t want there to be an after when it came to Scully.

He shuddered, the mere thought of moving forward without her making his insides shrivel up like a drying rose petal. He could never, ever let there be an after.

When he got into work that day he arrived at the basement at their usual time, but Scully was nowhere to be found. Typically, he was content to spend all day down here mulling over countless case files, formulating impossible theories. But typically, Scully was down here to listen to him. He tried to call her, twice, to no avail.

He’d suspected something was off last night but now he was concerned something was very wrong. He’d been thinking about what she’d said in their office ever since it had happened. All morning he’d allowed it to work its way into his brain like a splinter, and now he still felt it, a sharp pain at his temple he feared wouldn’t subside.

Restless, he wandered up into the bullpen looking for her. Did she have an appointment at Quantico she’d neglected to tell him about? He tried over and over to come up with an excuse, a reason she’d left that wasn’t the most glaringly obvious one.

He went into the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, and as he was pouring it he heard some men wander in behind him.

“I asked her out once and she turned me down,” one of the voices said. “I just assumed she was frigid.”

Another man laughed. “I heard she’s a real bitch,” he said. “Maybe getting a little will help in that department.”

“I guess she’s got so few options down there,” a third voice chimed in.

Mulder got a sinking feeling in his gut. Down there. They were talking about Scully.

“Do you think she’d go out with me now? I mean, now that she’s putting out?” All of the men laughed and he heard high fives going around.

Jesus Christ, men are awful, was his first thought. He was embarrassed on behalf of his entire gender.

Part of him wanted to turn around and lay each one of the motherfuckers out. The other part, the one that felt Scully touching his forearm gently with a soft Mulder, no, won out and waited until they left.

For the first time he wondered if this was one of the reasons Scully had waited so many years to make this leap with him. He’d never had the opportunity, or perhaps the inclination, to really put himself in her shoes before. There had been barely a whiff of indiscretion and that’s all it had taken for her house of cards to come crashing down.

She was such a good person, and a great agent. She was smarter than all of those kitchen buffoons put together, and quite honestly, could probably take each one of them down without his help. But none of that mattered anymore.

An image of a holding cell in California entered his mind: the gaggle of cops fawning all over Jade Blue Afterglow. He’d joined in too, for no reason at all, other than a brief moment of male camaraderie. It was so unlike him but still, it had happened. And now it was clear the male agents in this very building were no different.

She wasn’t comfortable at work anymore, and it was because of this; of them, of the change they’d made to themselves. They’d crossed a line when they’d consummated their relationship, a line he couldn’t just step back over even if he wanted to, which he didn’t. That was a big enough deal. But for Scully, it had changed something about her fundamentally, something that bled over into her professional life. And it didn’t matter what they did, how secret their affair was, how few people actually knew the truth, because that something-- like a contagion-- had not only taken root in whoever had heard the rumors: it had taken root inside of her. There was nothing he could do to change that.

He felt like an idiot for doubting her, and as the wheels turned in his mind he could see the pieces of what had occurred last night snap into place, making sense of what was probably going on this morning. Scully, his Scully, hadn’t been in his bed last night, and that scared him. That knowledge, along with this alarming new development of her abandoning him in the middle of the night, was creating unease within him that simmered like a slow cooker.

He wondered how long it would take until his unease ratcheted up to real terror of losing her for good.

***

A few hours had passed with no sign of Scully when he was called, alone, into a meeting with several directors including AD Kersh. Skinner sat in the back of the room looking resigned.

“Have a seat, Agent Mulder,” one of the men said. He did. Mulder looked around the room and tried to recall meeting any one of these nameless men. Other than Skinner and Kersh, he couldn’t.

“I’m sure you’re aware why we’ve called you in today,” a short man with gray hair and glasses said. He shuffled some papers.

Was this about the video? Had he and Scully been outed to the entire FBI?

Mulder shook his head. They’d have to drag it out of him. “Not in the slightest, sir.”

“The bureau has been looking to make some cuts,” the man said. “Audits are scheduled and yours is the first department on the chopping block. It appears the X-Files unit just isn’t financially viable anymore.”

Mulder nodded slowly. He looked around. “And why isn’t my partner here to receive this news with me?”

“You tell us, Agent Mulder. She hasn’t shown up for work today, and isn’t responding to our calls.”

He blinked. It sounded accusatory.

“I don’t know where she is.”

It was the truth, but he didn’t seem to be fooling anyone. “I see,” muttered the man. “You should be aware it’s also been brought to our attention that you and Agent Scully have entered into an inappropriate personal relationship.”

He felt a chill go up his spine. Surely this wasn’t a coincidence. They're splitting us up.

“My personal relationships aren’t the bureau’s business, with all due respect,” he said.

“Yes,” the man said, “they aren’t. At least, they aren’t until they begin to interfere with your work.”

Mulder clenched his jaw, getting more irritated by the second. “How exactly is my personal life interfering with my work on the X-Files?” he asked.

“This is-” the man began to stumble over his words- “merely a financial decision, Agent Mulder.”

Mulder shook his head. “No, you said this was about a personal relationship a second ago,” he pointed out.

“There are many reasons we no longer condone the pursuit of X-File cases,” one of the men sitting behind the gray-haired man said, ostensibly rescuing the other. “Many reasons.”

Mulder suddenly felt ill. If the X-Files were being closed, so be it. But if the X-Files were being closed because of his and Scully’s relationship, that was something he could not tolerate.

“Sounds like there are two,” he said. “I counted two reasons.” He held up two fingers for emphasis. “Please, tell me if I’m getting this wrong.”

He knew it was probably foolish to denigrate the board’s decision this way, but he couldn’t help himself.

The gray-haired man sat forward in his seat, indicated the file on the table next to him. “Agent Mulder,” he said. “Inappropriate work relations aside, your travel expenses alone--”

“If it’s a financial issue, maybe Agent Scully and I could start sharing motel rooms. Solve one of these problems with the other.”

The board was silent. Mulder knew now wasn’t the time for jokes, but the entire situation felt so unfair. Inappropriate work relations? He wanted to scream at them, that he and Scully had maintained appropriate work relations for nearly their entire tenure on the X-Files, to a fault, he now thought, and for what? Only to trip at the finish line? They were being punished for simply following their hearts. And Scully’s punishment would most certainly carry on long after this debacle was over. It felt like everything was getting worse, not better.

The anger that had been brewing since he encountered those assholes in the kitchen started to boil beneath his skin. He could grin and bear it; take whatever crap assignment they put him on, allow Scully to get reassigned as well. Would they even allow him to go back to profiling if he wanted to? This all seemed like an excuse to get rid of him. He could see the writing on the wall.

For some reason his mind flashed to the dead girl in the strip mall, to Samantha, to the millions of faceless women whose voices had been silenced. To Scully, who, through no fault of her own, no longer felt respected or even safe in her own workplace. And this institution-- the one he’d joined as a young man with such optimism and fervor, poured his lifeblood into every single day at the expense of all else-- betraying him. Betraying Scully.

Skinner eyed him curiously from the back of the room. Moving on, he remembered. It’s what Skinner had suggested. Perhaps his boss had known this was coming all along.

“Agent Mulder, we’ve all come to a decision your time on the X-Files has come to a close,” said Kersh, speaking up for the first time. “Finish out the week, and you’ll be reassigned, along with Agent Scully, to separate departments on Monday.”

Mulder knew in this moment he had no more power, no more recourse. He’d lost the X-Files before, twice, but things were different this time.

This time, he had something else to live for.

He thought only of Scully’s face when he let his next words escape.

“Fuck you. All of you.”

Mulder took off his badge, threw it down on the conference table, and set his holster and gun down as well. Then he turned his back on a dozen stunned faces and left the room.

to be continued...

#msr #txf fic #fanfic #my fic #admiralty #up in your arms

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