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bteezxyewriter12 · 9 months

Text

Fucking You Right

Pairing- Jungkook x Named Reader

Word count- 4.9k

Includes- Argument, sex, fingering, oral, pussy eating, cum eating, missionary, cock riding, tummy bulge, squirting, multiple orgasms, fluff, Jungkook is such a fanboy for his girl

Tag List- @mingtina @jaxxminee @yeosayang @delightfulmoonbanana @tannie13 @y00nzin0 @marsstarxhwa

@borntowalkaway @soulseobi05 @kpop-bambi @seokwoosmole @meowmeowminnie @realisticnotes @effielumiere @svnbangtansworld

Gif Credit- @jung-koook

Masterlists- check out for more fics

📝Masterlists 📝BTS Masterlist 📝Jungkook Masterlist

Jungkook POV

She's bopping her head to the music, my headphones on her ears, sitting next to me on the couch, Bam's head in her lap as she absentmindedly pets him

She's the only one I'm letting hear the finished track before anyone else

I value her input and I also wanted her to hear this song

The explicit version

I see when she hears the part I want her too because her head snaps to me, her eyes wide as plates, her mouth dropped open

"Holy shit", she gapes

I just smile, waiting for the song to finish

Waiting to see if she gets it

Two minutes later she pulls the headphones off, her face blushing

"Jesus Christ Kookie", she says

"Do you like it? Is it good?"

She nods, "It's good. So cute and then... damn....that line..."

"Which one?", I ask nonchalantly

She rolls her eyes, "You know. The 'fucking you right' one? ARMYS are gonna go insane"

Yeah I know

But that's not why I did it

"Are you really gonna sing this live?"

I shake my head, "That's the explicit version. There's a clean one. Changes fucking to loving"

She raises her eyebrow, "Still can be taken sexually"

I shrug, "I don't care"

I really don't

I'm not a fourteen year old anymore

I'm twenty five and ARMYS have to recognize I'm a grown man now

"K-ARMYS might be upset", she says, "I-ARMYS not so much. They're used their artists dating. To them it's not a big deal"

"That's why there's a clean version", I answer

"Well, I really liked the song. Congrats on writing a bop", she smiles

"Thanks", I smile, somewhat annoyed that she still isn't getting it

She nods, cuddling Bam, "So movie? Or do you wanna keep watching the kdrama we started?"

I just stare at her, not believing that she's not going to say anything more

I mean I'm talking about fucking someone in the song

Something no BTS member has done and she's not gonna ask more about it?

How?

"Kookie?", she asks, tilting her head, "Are you ok?"

No, I'm not

"Is that all you have to say?"

"Uh what?"

"About the song. Is that all you have to say?"

"Well yeah", she says confused, "I mean you asked for my opinion and I gave it. I don't know what else to say"

"You don't know what else to say?", I repeat, getting upset, "So you're not going to ask about the fucking part? Like is it literally or figuratively? Like is it an actual person?"

"Well I assume you mean a girl Jungkook", she answers, "But I don't know why you need me to ask about your sex life? Why do I have to know who you're fucking?"

"I'm not fucking anyone", I growl, angry this isn't going the right way

"Then what the hell?"

"You're not curious if I have someone in mind when I wrote that line? When I wrote this whole song which is basically a love song?"

"I don't need to know who you're pining for Jungkook"

"You should be asking because it's fucking you!", I yell, the shock on her face so fucking irritating, "The song is about you!"

I can't believe she's this oblivious

"What?", she gapes

"God, you're so fucking dumb!", I shout, standing up, starting to pace, Bam lifting his head and barking at me, "Jesus Christ, I've dropped so many fucking hints over the last few months and you don't get any of them!"

I've done everything I could think of- complimenting her, holding her hand, constantly hugging her, kissing her cheek

We fucking cuddle everytime we watch something

And she does all these things back to me and I don't understand what she doesn't get

I can't stand it when she introduces me as her best friend, when she constantly talks about what a good friend I am and all that shit

It infuriates me

And I'm angry at myself because I was too chicken shit to be direct

The fear of her rejection is massive

I have no problem getting girls to fuck, no problem telling girls my feelings for them when I did have girlfriends

But with her it's like I'm catatonic when it comes to talking about my feelings for her

I assume it's because I'm fucking in love

I've never went that far with any of the girls

It was never love

But with her it just fucking hit me in the face and at first I was terrified

I tried to deny it for awhile but being with her all the time, I couldn't

It was fucking obvious

To me anyway

I choked every time I tried to say something so I decided to drop hints

None of which she got

This song was the last thing I was going to try indirectly

Yes it's also for ARMYS but certain lines in the song I wrote when I thought of her

And I suspect the only reason why I'm saying anything at all is because I'm so heated

"Hints?", she asks

"Yes fucking hints! Goddamn Joanne, we fucking cuddle every time we hang out!", I yell, "I hate when you call me your best friend. I don't want to fucking be your best friend! I want to be your fucking boyfriend! I want to be the only fucking guy you want, the only guy you see, the only guy you love"

Her eyes are huge, blinking, as she whispers, "Love?"

"Yes love! I fucking love you! What do you think that line about giving all of me in the song is about? The devotion line? It's everything I want to give you!", I shout, "And by the way, you can be damn sure, I'd fuck you right!"

The look of utter shock on her face is insane to me

"I'm fucking stupidly in love with you!", I yell, to make everything clear

"Then why didn't you say that!", she yells back, standing up, making Bam yelp, jump off the couch and leave the room

"Because I was fucking scared! You fucking mean everything to me! I didn't want to lose you because you don't feel the same way!", I yell

"That's your fault! I never gave you the impression that you couldn't tell me anything or that I'd ever drop you, no matter what!"

"I was scared!"

"You didn't have to be!"

"Well how the fuck should I have known that?"

"You would have if you'd open your fucking mouth instead of dropping stupid hints like we're in high school!", she roars, "If you'd open your stupid mouth you'd know that you are the only guy I ever wanted! That I want to be your girlfriend for literally years! You'd know that I'm stupidly in love with you too! You fucking jerk!"

I open my mouth to yell at her when what she says sinks into my brain

She....loves me?

"And by the way, I love that your stupid song is about me and you better be damn sure you're gonna fuck me right", she yells, "And to start you better get your ass over here and kiss me right fucking now Jeon, Jungkook!"

My feet move immediately, practically running to her

Pulling her into my arms, I crash my lips against hers in an explosive kiss that shocks my entire body

I feel like my body is on fire, fireworks going off and I knew, I knew she's the one

Her arms move around my neck, her body pressing against mine as my arms wrap securely around her

My tongue finds hers, pressing together and shivers run up my spine

When we pull away, I smile, running my fingers in her hair, my eyes on her gorgeous brown ones

"I love you", I finally say

"I love you", she smiles, "My Kookie"

I nod, leaning my forehead against hers, "Always yours"

She kisses me again just as I was about to kiss her

I pick her up as the kiss deepens, heading right to my room

Bam is laying on the floor and he needs to get out right now

"Bam, out. Living room"

He whines but gets up and leaves the room

I close the door, sparks running up my spine as her lips press into my neck over and over again

I get her on my bed, kissing her passionately as I begin to undress her

I need her now

She helps me get her clothes off, pulling mine off at the same time, the clothing thrown all over my room

"Jesus Kookie", she says, gaping at me, her eyes widening when she looks at my dick, "That's...wow... very....huge"

I smirk at her, "Yeah. It's all for you baby"

She swallows hard as I get on the bed next to her

Pushing her down on the bed, I get my first glimpse of her, my mouth dropping

She's fucking amazing

Her stomach actually has some girl abs that I had no clue would turn me on

They're not cut into her like mine are but the faint lines are there

And now I noticed the small muscles in her arms and her thighs, muscles that were always covered up by clothes

Add the tattoos sprinkled all over her body I had no idea about and she's like my wet dream

"I didn't know you worked out", I say, touching her stomach

"Uh yeah. I don't go to a gym or anything, I just do it at home", she says, nervously, "Do....do you not like it? Do I look like a guy?"

I scoff, "No Joanne, you do not look like a guy. Don't be dumb. You're fucking gorgeous baby. God, I didn't know I'd be this turned on by your muscles baby"

"Really?", she asks quietly

"Really baby", I assure her, "And this just means that now you have to come work out with me"

She raises her eyebrow, "You want to do that?"

"Definitely", I nod, "We can work out together and then I can fuck you all over the gym"

Her cheeks turn so red, making me grin

"I'm gonna fuck you against every wall, on every machine we use and in the shower", I tell her, lowering my mouth to her ear, changing to a whisper, "Then I'm gonna bring you home and fuck you all over my apartment"

"Fuck Kookie", she whimpers

God I'm so turned on and I can't stop my hands from roaming all over her pretty body

"Fuck baby, I'm gonna fuck you so good. Every fucking day, all day"

"Seven days a week?", she giggles making me chuckle too

"Damn right baby. Gonna fuck you right, eat your pretty pussy just right, make you cum over and over for me", I tell her, leaning down, pressing kisses to her chest as I grope her boobs, "Make you scream my name until I'm the only thing in your pretty head. Fill your tiny pussy up with my cum, watch it drip out of you"

"Fuck Kookie"

"Mmm baby", I whisper, kissing around her nipple, "Then after I'm gonna kiss you, hold you, cuddle you"

I stop kissing her, looking up into her eyes, "And I'm gonna love you right every day of my life Jo. You're my everything and I love you so much"

She smiles, her fingers running in my hair, pushing it off my forehead, "I love you Kookie. Always baby"

I smile, letting her love wash over me, making me so fucking happy

Moving to her lips, I give her a sweet kiss, savoring the feel of her lips against mine

Then I pull away and immediately attach my mouth to her nipple, sucking on the perfect bump

"Jungkook, fuck!", she moans, her hand burying in my hair

God, her nipple is so hard, easy to suck on as I squeeze her boobs over and over

Her tits are amazing and I know I'm gonna be on them all the fucking time

Switching between nipples, I suck and lick all the while trailing my hand down her sexy body

Getting between her legs, I slide two fingers inside

She's so wet she takes them easily, moaning loudly as I massage inside her cunt

Her pussy clenches tightly around my fingers and I can't fucking wait to get her around my dick

She's gonna feel so fucking good

Pulling my fingers almost out, I thrust them back in, listening to her wet cunt take them

Moving faster, I thrust into her again and again, trying to find her spot

After a few more pumps, she moans so loudly, clamping down on my fingers, her pretty body shaking

Found it

Making sure I hit there as I finger her, I spread kisses down her body, feeling her skin tremble under my lips

I like that a lot

Finally getting between her legs, I watch her wet hole take my fingers, creaming them as I kiss her thighs, mesmerized by the sight

"So pretty baby", I murmur

My eyes land on her throbbing clit and fuck me, I need it in my mouth now

Leaning forward, I give her bump a lick, making her shout in pleasure, then I suck it in my mouth

It throbs against my lips, sending bliss down to my hard cock and I can't stop myself, I start sucking on her hard and fast

"Jungkook!", she cries and oh man, I never loved hearing my name more than this second

I keep my fingers moving at a steady pace, pressing on her spot again and again, slurping on her perfect clit

Both of her hands move into my hair, gripping hard as she cries out in pleasure

Fuck, she's so hot

I swear I had to be fucking stupid to not notice her sooner

She's the most beautiful, sexy, hot, stunning girl I've ever seen

I'm so happy everything worked out and she's finally mine

"Jungkook! I....I'm...I", she trails off into a moan

Hearing her fuels me to go harder and I suck on her faster, loving the way her clit feels in my mouth

God, I'm so gonna eat her out everyday

Not only do I love making her feel good, I'm enjoying this so much too

Another tug on her bump has her screaming my name, her body arching off the bed as she cums, holding my head against her cunt

I don't stop sucking, making sure she feels the pleasure throughout her orgasm, her pussy pulsing so hard around my fingers, soaking my hand

Feels so good

When she finishes, I slide my tongue down as I pull my fingers out

Licking around her hole, her cum hits my tongue and I moan from how absolutely sweet she tastes

Opening her legs more, I run my tongue on her more, swallowing her creamy cum

God, she's so good

How is she this good?

Fuck

When I get everything, I don't stop licking her, sliding my tongue up between her swollen lips then lavishing her clit again before sliding back down

"Kkk... Kookie..."

"Need more"

"Huh?"

"Need more of you", I tell her between licks

My god her pussy is so soft against my tongue, so fucking wet

I love it

"You do?"

"Oh yeah baby", I answer, running my tongue along her slit, "You taste so fucking good baby. I need more"

"Jesus", she whispers, only making me chuckle

"I need you to cum in my mouth baby so I can swallow you're yummy cream"

"What?", she squeaks

"Oh yeah baby", I continue, swirling my tongue around her little hole, "Your cum tastes amazing and I need more"

"Fuck"

"Gonna give it to me?", I ask, poking my tongue into her hole, wiggling inside her

"Yes! Yes Kookie!", she cries, her body arching again

God that sight it so fucking beautiful, it's burned in my memory

Pulling my tongue out, I lick up her cunt then plunge my tongue back in, her cries so fucking beautiful

Her fingers twist in my hair hard as I tongue fuck her, my own hands on her thighs, keeping her legs spread wide open for me

Her cunt throbs around my tongue each time I dive into her, the pulses going straight to my dick

I'm so fucking horny and I need to fuck her soon

I need to know what it's like to be inside her

Soon, I tell myself, soon

The next plunge in her cunt sends her over the edge, her pussy squeezing my tongue as she cums all over it

"Jungkook! Jungkook!"

I'm hit with her delicious taste, moaning as I keep swallowing until I'm sure I get it all

So good

I give her one long lick after she finishes, then move away

She starts to sit up, but I move over her, gently pushing her back down

"But don't you want-"

I shake my head as I get her legs around me, "Not now baby. I'm fucking dying to be inside you"

She smirks, moving her arms around my back, pulling me on top of her, skin to skin

Fuck, she feels so soft, so smooth against me

"Is that so?", she asks, lifting her head, kissing my cheek

I nod, "Want you so bad baby"

"Then it's good I want you just as badly"

"Yeah?", I ask shyly

I have been very vocal about wanting to fuck her and I'm glad she feels the same about me

Her hand moves between us, wrapping around my dick

"Fuck, so big baby", she murmurs, stroking me, pleasure entering my body, "Are you gonna fit?"

I nod, moaning softly, "Yeah baby. I'm gonna stretch you out so good. Make you fit around me"

"Promise?", she smiles

"Promise baby", I agree

She moves my cock to her hole just as her lips crash against mine

I push in, my head slipping inside her

She drenches me as I move in inch by inch, spreading her unbelievably tight pussy around my cock

"Jungkook! Fuck!", she moans, her pussy taking my cock so well

God she feels so good, sucking me in as I move

Fuck

"Oh fuck, yes baby", I moan when I finally slide all inside her tight pussy, my body actually shaking

"Kookie, oh god, Kookie!", she cries, her body pressed right against mine, clinging onto me

"Fuck, you're even better than I imagined", I murmur

"Imagined?", she whimpers quietly

Smiling at her, I nod, "Yeah. If you don't think I fantasized about having your sweet pussy wrapped around my cock all the damn time then you're crazy"

Her entire face flushes pink and it's so cute

"Is...is it just like you imagined?"

"Better", I tell her, "So much better baby"

She smiles shyly, "You're better than I imagined too"

I smile wider, proud that she thought of us together

At least I wasn't the only one

Kissing her, I start moving, pulling back then plunging back in

"Oh my fucking god", I moan, feeling her spread open so pleasurably, pulsing hard when I'm all in, "Oh baby fuck"

Her pussy is so loud, the wet slippery noises of my cock fucking her so fucking pretty to listen to

I need more

I need to go deeper

Moving my arms under her legs, I push them to her chest, getting on my knees and pounding into her cunt at a rapid speed

I get in so much deeper, slamming into her spot, her screams getting louder and louder, feeling out of this world

When I look down, I see her cunt creaming my cock so much, it's fucking all over

I have never seen a pussy this creamy, not even in porn

And it's all mine

All fucking mine

Each pound into her cunt splits her open on my dick as I move harder and harder, the sound of our skin slapping mixing with the sound of her squelching pussy

Something I'm so excited to listen to every day

With each move inside her, I watch her stomach bulge, so turned on knowing my cock is that deep inside her

"Do you feel how we were made for each other?", I ask her as I fuck into her, "Do you feel how my cock was meant to be inside you? How your pussy was made to be wrapped around my cock and only mine?"

"Yes", she cries, her fingers gripping my arms so hard, her eyes closed, face in pleasure

"Do you feel how I was made to move inside you baby?"

"Yes Jungkook", she moans, "Yes baby"

"You were made for me baby. Everything about you, you were meant for me", I tell her, really believing that, "And I was made for you Jo. Just for you"

She nods in agreement, "Yes Kookie. Just for you baby"

"I love you", I tell her

Her eyes open and I can see the love for me in them

It's truly aweing

"I love you Jungkook"

Crashing my lips to hers, I soak in her words, her kiss and I'm utterly happy

Her pussy clamps down hard around me, pulsing at the speed of light and I know she's close

"Cum for me baby. Cum for my cock", I murmur, pressing kisses into her neck, listening to her moan my name over and over

This is something I can get used to every fucking day

"Oh my god, Kookie", she cries, her fingers digging into my arms as she clenches my cock in a death grip, coming so fucking beautifully

I watch her, mesmerized while unbelievable pleasure hits me hard

"Jungkook! Jungkook!", she cries, her small body shaking against me

Fucking hell, it feels so good

So goddamn good

I'm ready to explode but I push back my orgasm

I'm not ready to be out of her pussy yet

Thrusting into her, I fuck her through her orgasm, her body relaxing when she's finished

"Good baby?", I smile

"Amazing", she says, breathing hard as she struggles to sit up

"Baby-", I start

"Wanna ride you", she says and I nod, so down for that

Pulling out, I let her push me down on my back, watching her climb in my lap

I'm so fucking excited as I realize I get to watch her body as she fucks me

Oh my god this is going to be amazing

I watch her get my head in her hole, then watch her hole spread and strain as she slides down my cock

There's so much fucking cream pouring from her cunt, her pussy only getting wetter the more she takes me

She finally bottoms me out, sitting on me, her hips immediately rocking on me

The tight grip around my cock feeling absolutely perfect, her throbbing increasing the more she grinds on me

"Fuck baby, this pussy feels so good", I murmur, placing my hands on her hips and slowly moving them up her body

I love touching her skin, feeling her muscles underneath

Such a turn on

"Mmm baby", she whimpers, "Love your hands on me baby"

"Don't worry baby" I assure her, "I'm good to be touching you every single day, just feeling your pretty skin, your pretty body"

"Mm", she murmurs, leaning back on my legs

Her hips lift, sliding up my cock, leaving a glistening mess on my length

It's so fucking pretty

She slides down quickly, taking me all in right away and I can't help but yell in pleasure when I'm back inside her

She keeps moving, her bounces getting harder and faster with each one

I watch my perfect girlfriend ride me, her boobs bouncing in my face, a light sheen of sweat all over her, pleasure in her face

I'm so fucking lucky she's mine

So lucky

Gripping her hips, I fall into the feeling of her pussy engulfing my cock, the spasms, the way she soaks me, a pretty ring of cream forming around the base of my cock

I'm in heaven

"Promise you'll bounce on my cock like this everyday baby", I murmur

"I promise", she moans, riding me harder, her pussy clinging to my length in a vice grip

"I promise I'll fuck you everyday", I promise her, "I'll eat your pussy everyday baby. I promise"

"Yeah Kookie", she whimpers, her cunt so close to coming

"I'll fill your cunt with my cum everyday"

"Yes Kookie. Want that so much", she moans, "Fuck, wanna be full of you. Full of your cock, full of your cum"

"You will be baby. I promise", I breathe, sweat rolling down my face

She slams down, my head rubbing her spot and she screams my name as she cums

Her hands grab my wrists, my entire lap flooded

Looking down, I realize she's squirting on my cock and that sight sends me over the edge

"I'm gonna cum!", I yell

"Inside my pussy! Fill me baby", she cries

I grab her waist, pulling her down on me as ecstacy tidal waves over me, shooting my cum into her squirting pussy

"Oh my fucking god! Joanne! Oh fuck!", I yell, stars blasting in my eyes from the sheer bliss

I can't...it's never felt this good before

Never

My body shakes hard and I'm just lost in the pleasure

Lost in her

I come back from that intense orgasm to kisses on my face and her voice murmuring, "I love you" over and over

I move my arms around her, hugging her to me, whispering, "I love you Jo"

She smiles, gives me a soft kiss, then moves off me, laying next to me

Turning to face her, I pull her into my arms, cuddling into her

She giggles, her arm wrapping around my body in a hug

Looking down at her, I smile widely

"What?", she asks

"Afterglow", I tease

She bursts out laughing, "You dork!"

I chuckle, nuzzling into her neck, giving her soft kisses, "That's your dork"

"Yeah mine", she giggles, "All mine"

"Fuck baby, you have no idea how happy you make me when you say that. I never thought you'd be mine Jo"

"I am", she assures me, "And you're my Kookie"

"Always baby", I promise, gently pressing my lips against hers

After the kiss, she snuggles into me and I'm having the best fucking time, holding her tightly

"Cuddle time", she says so adorably

"Yeah baby. All cuddles all the time"

Her musical laughter fills the room and I know I'll never tire of hearing it

"Nap time?", she asks, making me laugh

"Yeah baby but first I have to ask you something"

"Mm what is it?"

"Well it's about the song"

"What about it?"

I've been thinking about this since I recorded the song and I really hope she goes for it

"I want you to be in the music video"

Her eyes shoot open, her mouth dropping, "What?"

"I want you to be in the music video with me", I repeat, "The managers, director and I were talking about the video and we all agreed that there should be a girl in it with me"

"But doesn't the director already have someone? An actress?"

I nod, "Yeah, he does but I asked him to hold off on contacting the actress. I told him I had someone in mind but I had to ask first"

"I...I don't know what to say"

"Say yes baby", I ask, "I just, I want you in the video. It's a song for you, about you baby. I don't want to pretend to sing it to an actress. I want you"

She bites her lip hesitantly, "But Kookie, won't ARMYS ask you who I am? Who the girl is in the video? I'm not a well known actress that they will recognize. I don't want it to cause problems for you"

I know why she's worried

I know ARMYS would get mad about a girl in the video

I see the ridiculous comments some leave about how they'll stop supporting me if a girl is in the video

Or how upset and hurt they would be

It's ridiculous

I'm not allowed to have someone special but they can?

It's not fair and to be honest I don't care if they're mad

I'm not sixteen anymore

I'm not a sheltered baby

And if I want my girlfriend in my music video I damn well will

If she agrees of course

"Baby, when they ask me that I'm going to tell them the truth"

"The truth?", she gapes

"Yes", I nod, "I'm going to tell them you're my girlfriend and that I'm ridiculously in love with you"

"Kookie, you can't-"

"Yes baby, I can", I say gently, "I don't care if they get mad. I'm not going to lie to them either. They either support me or they don't. But I'm not hiding you. Not a chance in hell"

She doesn't say anything, shock over her face

"So will you be in my music video?"

A small smile forms on her face as she nods, "Yeah baby. Ok"

A huge relief washes over me

"Thanks baby", I say, then give her a kiss

"Just don't blame me if you're career tanks after this", she mumbles

"I won't", I laugh, "Don't worry so much baby. As long as we're together, everything will be fine"

She giggles, nodding, settling into my arms, "Ok Kookie. I love you"

"I love you too baby"

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286 notes · View notes

ynbabe · 1 year

Text

Titans x Male reader

Dick: Every time I hear someone talking about updog, I’m torn between not wanting to fall for it and wanting to help them complete their joke.

Kory: Okay, but what is updog?

Rachel : Updog is a long sausage in a bun, often served with ketchup, mustard, onions, and/or relish.

Gar: Not, that’s a hot dog. An updog is when a new version or patch of an application is released.

Jason: No, that's an update. You’re thinking of the fourth largest city in Sweden.

M/N: Surely, that’s Uppsala, where’s updog is the giant spider in Harry Potter.

Dick: That’s Aragog. Updog is a symbol conventionally used for an arbitrarily small number in analysis proofs.

Gar: You’re thinking of epsilon. Updog is an upward-moving air current.

Rachel : No, that’s an updraft. An updog is the modern version of a henway.

Kory: What’s a henway??

Dick: Oh, about five pounds.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Dick: If you bite it and you die, it’s poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it’s venomous.

Kory: What if it bites me and it dies!?

Rachel : Then you’re poisonous. Jesus Christ, Kory, learn to listen.

Gar: What if it bites itself and I die?

Jason: That’s voodoo.

M/N: What if it bites me and someone else dies?

Kory: That’s correlation, not causation.

Gar: What if we bite each other, and neither of us die?

Jason: That’s kinky.

Dick: Oh my God.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Dick: I CAN'T DO IT!

Kory, laughing: I CAN'T EITHER!

Dick: I CANT FUCKING DO IT ANYMORE

Rachel, saw them walking in: WELL I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, YOU CAN EITHER GIVE UP NOW, OR YOU CAN FIGURE IT OUT. BECAUSE WE CERTAINLY CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT YOU, AND WE KNOW YOU CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT US.

Dick:

Dick: I appreciate it,

Dick: BUT LOOK WHAT WE'RE DEALING WITH-

Gar, was the man in the chair: Dick-

Dick: YOU GOTTA DRAW THE LINE SOMEWHERE!

Gar: Dick we gotta-

Dick: YOU GOTTA DRAW A FUCKING LINE IN THE SAND. YOU GOTTA MAKE A STATEMENT.

Dick: YOU GOTTA LOOK INSIDE YOURSELF AND SAY 'What am I willing to put up with today?'

Dick, motioning to M/N and Jason covered in blood, standing in his room’s doorway like the shinning twins: NOT FUCKING THIS

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

*Jason is cooking*

M/N: Any chance that’s for me?

Jason: It’s for Gar. I’m planning on making some bad choices tonight, and I need him on my side.

Kory, preparing the med bay: I never realized the forethought that went into being a disappointment.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

M/N: I just ended a two year relationship.

Jason: Oh, fuck. You good?

M/N: Hm? Oh yeah, I’m fine. It wasn’t my relationship.

*Gar and Rachel fighting from across the room*

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Jason: Do you think different paints have different tastes?

Gar: They do.

M/N: ...Why did you say that with such certainty?

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Jason: Come on, I wasn't that drunk last night.

Gar: You were flirting with M/N.

Jason: So what? He’s my boyfriend .

Gar: You asked him if he was single.

Jason:

Gar: And then you cried when he said he wasn’t.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Jason: What if mayonnaise came in cans?

M/N: Well, that would suck because you can't microwave metal.

Gar: DICK!!! M/N AND JASON ARE BEING WEIRD AGAIN

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Gar, trying a new recipie: Please bring home PURIFIED water with NO minerals added for taste

Jason, being a bastard: We got spring water

Gar: NO.

M/N, bastard^2 : with EXTRA minerals

Jason: it's like licking a stalagmite

Gar: DON'T COME HOME.

M/N: Mmmmm cave water

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Gar: I woke up and chose VIOLENCE. I WILL COMMIT ARSON AND BURN EVERYTHING TO THE GROUND!!! I AM ANGRY-

M/N: Awwww, you're so adorable! Give me a hug~

Gar: Wh- What? NO, YOURE SUPPOSED TO BE SCARED OF ME! TREMBLE BEFORE MY WRATH-

Jason, recording: This is so cute.

GUYS!! I just rewatched Titans after a yearrrr and I swear to god idk why Gar is so underrated. He has such a great character arc and he is absolutely HILARIOUS. also I just realised he became like all the male role models he had in his life, like when he used to live with the Doom Patrol, Larry and Cliff were the primary caretakers, they would make the food and give emotional support and then Dick, he was basically a dad to him and Rachel

#dc #dc x reader #dc x y/n #dick grayson #x reader #jason todd #jason todd x reader #jason todd x male reader #garfield logan #beast boy #rachel roth #koriand'r #hbo titans #titans x reader

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canirove · 4 months

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Broken Hearts Football Club | Chapter 26

Author's note: Hope you enjoy this chapter, and happy new year to those of you who don't follow me! 🫶🏻

Previous chapter | Next chapter

Masterlist

"June… June, my phone is ringing. June, I have to pick up. I… fuck" Ben moaned, his phone slipping from his hand and hitting the floor.

"What the hell are you doing, Chilwell?" she said, sticking her head from under the duvet. "I almost bit your…"

"It's from work, I have to pick up" he said, reaching for his phone.

"Urgh, fine" she replied, resting her chin on his stomach.

"Hello? Yes, sorry. I had my phone charging and it was in another room. Yeah, yeah" he chuckled. "Wait, really? I… I don't know what to say… No, no. Yes. I want to do it. Yes, yes, don't worry. Ok, thank you. Bye."

"And? What is it? Why are you smiling like that?"

"Because my facts are back."

"What?"

"I just got offered to comment the World Cup, June."

"You what?" she said, quickly sitting up.

"I'm going to Australia" Ben replied, also sitting up.

"You… You are coming with us? With me?"

"I am, yes" he said. "Apparently Sarina called them and asked them to convince me to go because she knows that without my facts you don't play at your best."

"Oh, shut up!" she laughed.

"I'm gonna be merciless, Maxwell."

"You've been a softie for too long, I don't think you can do that anymore" June teased him.

"Do you want me to show you how soft I am?"

"I'm waiting" she smirked.

"You asked for it" Ben said, putting an arm around her waist and throwing her in the bed while she just giggled. "But can I say something first?"

"A fact?" June asked, running her hands through his hair.

"Yes, a fact. The factest fact ever."

"Ok.”

"I love you, June Maxwell."

"I know" she smiled.

"Are you going to run away now?"

"I can't. You have me trapped under your body. And my fingers are tangled on your hair. And I…"

"You what?" Ben said, caressing her cheek.

"And I'm not going anywhere. I'm not running away. I'm stuck with you, and you are stuck with me, Chilwell. And it's gonna be for a very long time." Because I love you too, she said to herself before kissing him.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"You are gonna end up breaking your neck, June" Lauren laughed.

"What?"

"He's coming, he isn't running away like others do."

"Fuck you, James" June replied, showing her friend her middle finger.

"Can't wait to spend the next 20 hours with you" she laughed again.

Today was the day. They were finally flying to Australia for the World Cup. And they were sharing their plane with the English press, which meant that Ben was there too.

He and June had been facetiming daily since she had moved to St. George's Park with the team, and every free moment she had, they were texting, telling each other about their day or just sharing random thoughts that crossed their minds. She actually felt like a teenager in love for the first time.

She was always looking forward to talking to him, constantly finding herself smiling like an idiot, her heart skipping a beat every time she saw she had a WhatsApp notification from him. How had she ended up falling head over heels for Ben fucking Chilwell?

"Looking for a certain someone?"

"Jesus Christ, Leah" June said, jumping on her seat. "You scared me."

"I know" she smiled, sitting next to her. "But you were looking for him, weren't you?"

"She's been looking at the plane's door since we sat down, trying to spot her boyfriend" Lauren smirked.

"He isn't my boyfriend" June replied.

"He may not have the title yet, but you are definitely behaving like a couple."

"And we are really happy for you, Maxwell" Leah added, giving her a hug.

"Can you show it by teasing me a bit less? It's really annoying."

"Teasing is our love language" Lauren smiled.

"I don't like it."

"Sorry not sorry" she shrugged.

"Uh, looks like someone got a text" Leah said when June's phone pinged, stupidly moving her eyebrows up and down.

"Is it from him? What does he say? Meet me later for sex in the bathroom?" Lauren asked.

"Meet me later when everyone is asleep" Leah read.

"Hey, that's private!" June protested, hiding her phone against her chest.

"Try to keep things quiet while you are at it, ok? I need my beauty sleep" Lauren smirked.

"We aren't going to do anything in the bathroom."

"That's what you say now. But once you have him in front of you…"

"I hate you. Both of you" June said, elbowing Leah.

"Hey, show some respect to your captain!"

"I'm a captain too" she replied, sticking out her tongue.

"Whatever. And save that thing for your boyfriend's mouth, Maxwell" Leah said, quickly running away before June could hit her, Lauren laughing by her side.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"Hey" Ben said.

"Hi" June replied with a shy smile.

"How is the flight going?"

"I can't wait for it to be over, to be honest" she sighed.

"Can't sleep?"

"Nope."

"Neither can I. If only we could do it together…"

"My seat is big enough for the two of us, but I don't think Sarina would agree with us cuddling for the rest of the flight even if that helped me sleep."

"I don't think so, no" Ben chuckled. "And what would you tell her? Everyone thinks we can't stand each other."

"Actually, people think we've gone from enemies to lovers."

"Which we have" he smirked.

"Yes, we have" June replied with a matching smile.

"Though I want to be more than just your lover, June" Ben said, taking a step towards her. They were standing in the bathroom's corridor, and just with one stride he had closed most of the space between them.

"What do you mean?" Though she was pretty sure she knew what he meant. What he was going to ask her.

"Before meeting you I checked the map and we are flying over the Indian Ocean, and I think it is a really cool place for this. People usually choose somewhere romantic, like at dinner or at a meaningful place for them. But I don't think we have a place like that."

"What about your house? That's where you told me that you… that you love me" June whispered when a flight attendant walked past them.

"And where we probably fell in love, yeah" he smiled. "I could wait and ask you once we are back home, but I want to see you win the World Cup as a proud boyfriend. I want to be able to tell everyone that the girl lifting that trophy, is my girlfriend. So, June Elizabeth Maxwell" Ben said, taking one of her hands and putting it over his chest. Over his heart. "Do you want to…"

"Oh, sorry to interrupt."

"Fucking hell, Andrew" Ben said, not letting go of June's hand.

"Sorry, sorry" he chuckled. "Are you ok, Chilly?" he asked, nodding towards June's hand on his chest.

"Yeah, yeah. Maxwell was teasing me about my heart not being ready for the World Cup, and I was showing her how ready it is. How ready I am" Ben said, his eyes fixed on hers.

"Oh, I see… Is there anyone in the bathroom? I need to use it."

"All yours" Ben replied.

"Ok, great. And again, sorry to interrupt your… teasing" Andrew said, this time properly smiling.

"He knows" June whispered when he disappeared inside the small bathroom.

"Where were we? Oh, yes…"

"Ben, Andrew knows."

"June Elizabeth Maxwell, do you want to be my girlfriend?"

"What?"

"June Elizabeth Maxwell, do you want to be my girlfriend?" Ben repeated.

"Do you need to use my full name?"

"Yes. Because that's how serious I am about this. About us" he said, closing the space between them a bit more.

"June Eli…"

"Ok, fine, yes."

"Yes what?"

"I…" she said, taking a deep breath. "I want to be your girlfriend, Benjamin James Chilwell."

"Say that again" he smiled.

"No."

"June Elizabeth…"

"You just sounded like my grandma" she laughed.

"I bet your grandma doesn't kiss you the way I do" Ben smirked.

"No one has ever kissed me the way you do. Mainly because no one has lips like yours, but…"

"I love you, June" he whispered while caressing her cheek, his nose brushing against hers.

"I…"

"Shit!" Andrew said behind them, making them both jump. "I'm sorry again, guys. But the door didn't open and I panicked for a second" he chuckled. "Did I interrupt something again?"

"No, nothing" June smiled. Just that she was about to tell Ben that she loved him.

"Oh, ok. I better go back to my seat, see if I can manage to sleep for a couple of hours."

"I should probably do the same" June said. "See you in Australia."

"See you there" Andrew smiled. "Chilly, are you coming?"

"Yes, yes" he said, looking at June walk away before following his colleague to his seat. A colleague he wanted to murder.

He was sure he had interrupted them when June was about to finally tell him that she loved him. And now who knew when they would have another chance to be alone and enjoy a moment like the one they were having.

"Anyway" Ben sighed, putting on his headphones. Maybe one of those YouTube videos that supposedly help you fall asleep would do the trick since nothing else had worked.

When he checked his phone, he saw that he had a new WhatsApp notification. A text from June.

"See you in Australia… boyfriend 😉😘"

#ben chilwell #ben chilwell fanfic #ben chilwell imagine #football fanfic #football imagine

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mask131 · 6 months

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While I'm at it, because I just had a little beef with a fanatical Christian who couldn't believe I was born in a Christian setting because I had a pentagram as an icon (you see the kind of person)... [Edit: For more details they were a clearly antisemitic Orthodox person who, after refusing to believe I was anything else than Jew, atheist or a devil-worshiper, starting lashing out at me when I said I had a Catholic upbringing saying I was the cause of the crusades and the reason Hitler was alive, yada yada, you know the kind of crazy religious person]

So I decided to have a brief Christianity talk. Not much but just this:

If you ask me, yes, there is a Christian mythology, even though people do not like this term - because there is a bunch of Christian legends and Christian myths that form a Christian folklore and a set of Christian tales with distant, weak or inexistant links to ACTUAL Christian teachings, rites and the actual Christian religion.

And I do believe that folk-Christianity is a fascinating thing that deserves to exist alongside official, actual Christianity. Santa Muerte, and the local saint celebrations, and strange Christmas and Epiphany beliefs, and this story about God and Saint Peter getting drunk at a farmer's house, and the fairytale about Jesus and the Virgin Mary throwing the devil and his wife in an oven to save the girls they wanted to eat... Anyway, no matter how much one can try to destroy folk-Christianity it will always survive because it was centuries and centuries of rites and beliefs spread across several continents, and you can't destroy that easily.

The thing that many people do not get is that a lot of what is Christianity today was completely made up. There's not a lot of Christianity today that was originally in the Bible. There's a lot of Christianity as practiced by the first Christians that was lost. The dates and meanings of celebrations like Easter, All Hallows Day or Christmas kept changing all year long. Lots of saints were completely invented. Don't even get me started on the apocryphal Gospels!

This is why studying and understanding the history and evolution of a religion always allow one to be more understanding of what the religion currently is and what is actually an "option" in it. Religions never stayed the same thanks to times changing, scholarly debates, schisms dividing it into various branches, political and economical forces being at play, translations from one country to the next - and that's not just true for Christianity, but also for all other religions. Islam, Judaism, Buddhism... They all had their own evolution, they all are today very different from what they started as, and to better understand them one needs to learn of their past, what they were, what they still are, what they're not anymore. Heck, today there are talks in India of kicking out and banishing all Buddhists when the religion started there! But now, Buddhism's main nations are China and Japan, and its Indian roots almost entirely forgotten...

Fanatics usually fail to do this study of their own religion's history and evolution, because they imagine that the past was just always a carbon-copy of the present, and that their beliefs stayed unmovable monolith coming straight from God (or whatever principle they follow) instead of something that went through centuries of men and women and governments.

Just look at why and how Protestantism came to be. People realized the Church had added a lot of stuff that wasn't there when Christians first appeared, and decided to return to the "original" Christianity, rejecting all the added, invented stuff. Like the celibacy of priests: Christians priests married and had children in the first centuries following the Christ's death. And the only reason Catholic priests took a vow of celibacy and virginity was because of economic concerns with inheritance matters. Jesus never asked those that followed him to never have children or never marry or never have sex.

Or take the existence of Purgatory! Completely invented by the Church around the Middle-Ages, never spoke about by the Christ or part of the original Christian religion, then quickly removed a few centuries later as a non-existent, borderline heretical superstition, and that yet survived in folk-Christianity, and then in popular culture.

In conclusion, I would have to say that there is one book that made me realize a lot of things about religion as a whole, and that convinced me to go from Catholic-Christian to simply deist. Terry Pratchett's book "Small Gods", which exactly put into words my feelings about the world: there is a difference between religion and organized religion. There is a difference between belief and the organizations built around this belief, between faith and the hierarchy created around this faith. The Church is like a shell that was built around the turtle that is the faith/belief/god - and sometimes, when the shell becomes too big and too heavy or too unfit for the creature it hosts, it smothers, hurts and kills the faith/belief/god, until there is only the shell. And people stop referring to the turtle, and only speak and interact with the shell.

This is the perfect explanation of how Jesus only preached peace and love and friendship and forgiveness, and its priests later invented the Inquisition and caused the witch-hunts.

#christianity #religion #christian history #christian religion #catholicism #catholic religion #folk-christianity #christian mythology

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bluejaysandblackbats · 11 days

Text

Hair Trigger

Fandom: DC Comics, Batfam, Superfam, YJ98

Summary: A junior at Gotham University, Jason finds it difficult to conceal his worsening mental health from his family and his friend, Jon Lane Kent. Family secrets are revealed and boundaries are pushed as Jason and Laney struggle to navigate through school, their romantic feelings, and their trauma. Could the reintroduction of Laney Kent be more trouble than it's worth, or is it just what Jason needed to confront the demons of his past?

I will also do trigger warnings for chapters and if there is smut I have the chapter(s) tagged so you don't have to worry about nsfw in the fic if you're just here for the story itself.

Chapters: 2/?

Characters: Jason Todd, Jonathan Lane Kent, Bruce Wayne, Clark Kent, Lois Lane, Cassandra Cain, Tim Drake, Conner Kent, Natalia Knight, Jonathan Samuel Kent, Cassie Sandsmark, Chris Kent, Bart Allen, Original Character(s)

Relationships: JayLaney, Clois, TimKon

Additional Tags: University AU, No Powers AU, Sharing A Bed, Romance, Angst

Chapter Two: Recap

Jason lay in bed until the late afternoon. He worried about how Bruce would react to the end of their conversation. He tidied up his apartment and allowed his phone to ring in the background until he could no longer tolerate the noise. "What?" Jason snapped as he answered his phone.

"Jason, you have no idea how worried everyone's been!" Dick yelled at him.

"How is it that I have to answer every single time one of you calls? I just want some time to myself—."

"Then say that, Jason! Jesus Christ! None of us know where you live, where you work, nothing! So, of course, we're all gonna panic when you hang up like that!" Dick chastised him.

"I get that, I do, but has it occurred to any of you that calling me four times a day every day to make sure I'm alive isn't helping me at all?" Jason asked. He heard Dick sigh on the other line.

"Why can't you just tell him this yourself? Why's it so hard for you to talk to him?" Dick asked.

"Because it's not his fault. It's nobody's fault but mine," Jason replied, "I just need a break. I'm tired."

"What are you tired of?" Dick asked the emotion rose in his voice.

Jason sat back on his bed and took a deep breath.

"I just want everyone to take a break from worrying about me all the time. I need a break from it... Aren't you tired, Dick?" Jason asked.

"Of course, I'm not. That's what families do. We worry about each other, which is the only way we can show that we love each other in this family," Dick whispered, "But if you need some time to breathe, I'll tell him that. We can give you that." Jason relaxed, and his shoulders dropped.

"Thanks," Jason whispered.

"But tell me one thing before I hang up... How was it hanging out with Laney after all these years?" Dick asked.

"It was fun... Like nothing changed," Jason replied. He caught himself smiling.

"Nothing?" Dick asked. Jason furrowed his brows.

"What?" Jason asked.

"Nevermind," Dick replied before hanging up. Jason went about the rest of his day, cleaning up and getting ready to go to the laundry room. Still, he wondered about all the cryptic messages Dick and Laney conveyed to him.

Jason decided to call Laney back on his way down to the laundry room, but he didn't exactly know what to say to him. "Ooh, he misses me," Laney teased.

"What did you mean last night?" Jason asked.

"I don't remember anything about last night," Laney answered without hesitation.

"Liar," Jason replied as he loaded the washing machine and put his quarters in. "Laney, when we were kids and got in trouble for sneaking into that movie, our dads told us we couldn't hang out anymore."

"It doesn't matter why anymore, Jason. We can hang out now," Laney answered sweetly, "That's all that matters, isn't it?"

"I'm starting to think that our parents told us two very different stories... Laney, please," Jason pleaded.

"I didn't know what I was talking about last night. I was just being my usual troublemaking self... I wasn't gonna tell you this, but I only got drunk because I didn't know what to say to you," Laney confessed, "I wasn't even sure if you would be anything like what I remember."

"Was I?" Jason asked.

"Yeah, I forgot how fun it was pissing you off. Except you're taller than me now, so instead of crying about it, you could just knock my head off," Laney laughed. Jason snickered.

Jason sat down on a bench while his clothes were in the wash. "Still an asshole," Jason laughed.

"Remember the day we met, and I made you cry?" Laney laughed.

"Yeah, you told me that veal was human meat," Jason replied. Laney hollered on the other line, still laughing at Jason. "I vividly remember throwing up immediately after you told me that."

"I'm sorry. That was terrible, but why did you believe me? Why would a restaurant serve human meat?" Laney took a deep breath.

Jason chuckled. "Okay, you have a point. Remember when I invited you to stay the night after that just so I could give you a wet willy while you were sleeping?" Jason laughed. "Isn't that how we ended up being friends?" Laney asked.

"No, we became friends after Christmas when—. No, it was New Year's," Jason messed with his hair.

"No, I'm pretty sure it was Christmas because you asked me why I was so mean to you all the time," Laney's voice softened, "You remember, don't you?" Jason didn't answer. Laney laughed uncomfortably. "I think your dad thought we were gonna end up killing each other before we made it to high school."

"I used to think about it before we were friends," Jason replied.

"Think about what?" Laney asked.

"Killing you," Jason answered casually. He got up and checked on his clothes during the awkward silence. Jason broke the silence with a laugh. "Lane?" Jason asked seriously.

"What?" Laney asked.

Jason kicked at nothing. "I haven't had fun in a really long time, but I had a lot of fun last night. Thanks for that," Jason mumbled, "And sorry for kicking you out earlier. It wasn't you—."

"Don't finish that sentence. Otherwise, I'm gonna think you're breaking up with me," Laney joked. He paused before changing his tone, "I know you, Jay. I knew you weren't okay when my dad gave me your number. I know you probably don't want me to come back today, but whenever you need somebody to just listen, I'm here."

Jason allowed the silence to flood in for a little while, and he found himself thinking about Laney's full weight on him as they held each other on the dancefloor that night. "Still there?" Laney asked.

"Mhm... Laney, you should come back later on today," Jason whispered. Laney made an affirmative noise.

"Ooh, should I wear my negligee this time?" Laney teased.

"Fuck off," Jason laughed, "What if I had terrible news?"

"Well, I bet you feel less terrible now. Do you think your dad will let us stay up past nine this time?"

"Bye, Lane," Jason rolled his eyes.

"Bye, Jay," Laney replied and hung up. Jason moved his laundry from the washer to a dryer, and he sat back down on the bench. A woman that lived on his floor came in and put her clothes in the washer.

"Having a yucky day again, sweetie?" she asked. Jason shook his head.

"I was, but I think I'll be okay now," Jason smiled.

The woman smiled and pulled two magazines out of her bag and handed one of them to Jason. She opened her magazine and held it up by Jason's face. "Have you ever thought about adding olive green to your wardrobe?" she asked. Jason chuckled.

"Are you telling me that I'm an autumn?" Jason asked. She nodded and looked back at the color scheme.

"I don't know about this orange on you, though... Or yellow..." She looked back and forth at him and the magazine.

"I hate to be weird, but how do you open up to an old friend when you haven't seen them for a long time?" Jason asked.

"That's a silly question. I have a better question for you. What is the risk of opening up to your friend?" she asked.

"I just don't want him to worry about me. I don't wanna feel weird about talking to him..." Jason trailed off.

"I think things might already be weird between the both of you. You seem like you're out of sorts today. I think if this person is really your friend, things won't be weird at all," she replied, "Do you still journal as we talked about?"

"I try to, but writing it down freaks me out. I just feel like I'm saying something dumb," Jason replied. They talked for a while until Jason's clothes finished drying, and he stayed to fold. After he finished folding, he said his goodbyes and made his way back to his apartment to make himself something to eat.

He felt a little sick to his stomach, being that he hadn't eaten all day. He made himself a sandwich and a cup of tea. He turned the tv on and allowed his mind to drift back to the day Jason and Laney got in trouble. He could only remember sneaking into the movie theater. Jason couldn't remember how they got caught or anything else from that day. That day seemed so important to him, and yet, he couldn't remember anything about it.

Jason got up, made himself some dinner, and soaked in the bath for a while. He closed his eyes and sank under the water, holding his breath and counting backward from one-hundred. By the time Jason got to zero, his head was clear. He pulled the plug and stood up slowly, grabbing his towel and drying his face.

Laney knocked on his door, and he wrapped the towel around his waist before going to answer. "You're early," Jason stated as he opened the door. Lane cleared his throat uncomfortably.

"What will the neighbors think?" Laney joked as he entered the apartment and closed the door behind him. Jason made his way back to his room to get dressed. "You went from being like four-foot-six to like six-foot-four. You gotta let me in on how you did that," Laney noted.

"Laboratory explosion!" Jason answered sarcastically from the other room. Laney put his bag on the floor and got comfortable on the couch.

"Some guys just have all the luck," Laney joked, "Listen, Jay... I'm gonna be straight with you. You know how our little brothers are friends?"

"Yeah..." Jason came out of his room in his pajamas and a t-shirt.

"The clumsy one... Uh, Tim, he told Conner that you haven't been home in months. He didn't say why, but he did say that everyone misses you," Laney admitted.

"Oh, well... I'm gonna tell you about that," Jason mumbled as he went straight to the kitchen. Laney kicked his shoes off and lay on the couch.

"If it makes it less awkward, I can tell you about something that I did that made my parents freak out," Laney replied.

"What did you do?" Jason asked. He smiled and turned around to look at Laney.

"That's just what my mom said," Laney laughed, "I got a tattoo. It says 'mom' in a heart on my back."

"No, you don't," Jason laughed.

"You're right, I got a belly button piercing as a gag," Laney replied.

"Got any other lies?" Jason asked.

"Ooh, one more... I didn't run away and try to go to your house after our parents said we couldn't hang out anymore," Laney replied. Jason's smile faded, and he turned back around to the fridge. "So, do you wanna tell me why you won't go home?"

"What?" Jason asked.

"Our brothers are friends. They talk," Laney replied. Jason shrugged.

"I had a rough time with a class last semester... It brought up a lot of bad memories, memories of things I thought I buried. Instead of telling Bruce that I was struggling, I kept it to myself," Jason mumbled. Laney leaned forward and made a noise to indicate that he was listening. "I figured once the semester was over, I'd be fine... But it was worse. We were gonna go on a summer trip, and I just wanted to stay home and be by myself... Get some sleep."

"What happened, Jason?" Laney asked. His voice was nearly unrecognizable to Jason.

Jason swallowed hard. "I couldn't sleep the whole time they were gone, and everyone came home early, asking how I was and what I was planning to do during the summer... And I snapped. I don't remember what happened in between, but I know that Bruce and I got into this huge fight. I don't remember what I said or what I did, but he checked me into the hospital. The day I was discharged was the last time we saw each other in person," Jason's voice broke, and he held his breath.

"Jason... Is that why you don't wanna go home?" Laney asked.

"I want to go home," Jason whimpered as tears streamed down his cheeks, "I just feel like I'm gonna implode every time I talk to him. I don't know why..." Jason couldn't talk through his tears anymore, and he felt a pair of arms wrap around him.

"It doesn't sound like anyone is holding that against you, buddy," Laney whispered. Jason turned around and held onto Laney.

"I can't go home," Jason wept. Laney let go and backed away.

"I used to think you were just messing with me, but you really don't remember a lot of things... Do you?" Laney asked. Jason wiped his face.

"What?" Jason asked. "What does that have to do with—?"

"It doesn't mean anything. I was just thinking out loud," Laney replied, "Besides, from what my brothers say, it sounds like your family misses you."

"It doesn't change what I did... Don't you ever wish you could go back in time and stop yourself before you do something stupid?" Jason asked.

"All the fucking time... But the thing is, we can't. Jason, he's your dad. I really don't think he cares about what you did or why you did it. I think he just wants you to come home," Laney suggested. Jason shook his head.

"It's not that easy. Every day, Lane... Bruce calls me every single day, two times a day in the least. Ever since I left home, I feel like there's so much pressure to go back and pretend that things are normal—."

"Jason, of course, you can't pretend things are normal. No one is asking you to pretend things are okay. Maybe they want to work on things with you," Laney replied, "And I get how you're feeling. I really do. I had a hard time telling my parents about my feelings... But once I did, we really got closer, and it was worth it." Jason sat on the couch and hugged his knees. Laney sat next to him on the sofa and turned the tv on.

Laney's phone rang, and he looked at Jason. "Mind if I get this?" Laney asked. Jason shook his head. "Hey," Laney answered, "Oh no, I'm not home right now... I will when I get home... Uh-huh... I said I wouldn't, Mom... I love you too, bye." Laney hung up.

Jason opened his mouth to speak, and Laney turned to look at him. "Lane... How come nothing's changed?"

"What do you mean?" Laney asked as he changed the channel.

"How is it still easy to talk to you?" Jason asked as he let go of his knees and planted his feet on the floor.

"It's because I get you," Laney replied calmly. He stretched out on the couch, throwing his legs over Jason's lap. "Also, you're not that different from how I remember you." Jason pushed Laney's legs off his lap and went straight to the kitchen.

"I can order some pizza," Jason offered.

"I already did, right before I left. It should be here any minute now," Laney replied.

As soon as the pizza deliverywoman came, Jason paid her and sat on the couch. "What have you been up to, Lane?" Jason asked.

"In the past eight years or—."

"Yeah, sure, Laney," Jason interrupted. Laney took a bite of pizza.

"Well, as you know, I was already on pretty thin ice with my parents when we were fourteen... So, they sent me away to go to school because they thought it'd keep me out of trouble. Fast forward like two years, they let me go back to regular school, and I'm pretty sure I went to my prom at some point... Oh, and I dated a friend of the family, which was kind of nice for a while," Laney replied.

"Oh? For how long?" Jason asked.

"Three years. We broke up two and a half years ago," Laney answered, "And what have you been up to? I know it hasn't been all bad."

"It wasn't. I was in a few plays in high school. I start working on campus pretty soon, and last year I got a xylophone... I don't remember why—."

"Do you still have it?" Laney asked. Jason nodded, and Laney gestured for Jason to go get it. Jason finished his slice of pizza and went to wash his hands. He went to his room and came out with a dark wooden xylophone.

"You can have it if you want—."

"No fucking way. Hold on," Laney replied, wiping his hands on a napkin and grabbed the mallets. "I had this roommate a few years ago that got a xylophone as a present from his parents because he said he was bored, and he was gonna throw it out, and well..." Laney played a tune on the xylophone.

"You play the xylophone?" Jason asked as he went back to eating. Laney nodded, smiling a devilish half-smile. For a while, Jason almost forgot they'd ever been apart.

As the night went on, Jason and Laney talked to each other about just about everything. Around midnight, Jason got up to turn the lights down, stopping as soon as he heard Laney mumble something. "Say what, Lane?" Jason asked.

"I didn't have any real friends until I met you. I mean, I've got some really great friends now, but you and me, we were partners in crime," Laney whispered. Jason smiled and nodded. "Did you really used to think about killing me?" Laney asked.

Jason grabbed some blankets from his closet and gave them to Laney. "Oh yeah," Jason laughed, "Remember when you put that rubber spider in my bed? I thought about smothering you with a pillow, but I wasn't sure I'd get away with it. Why? You never thought about it?"

"I never really got mad at you... Except for when you gave me a wet willy, that was disgusting, and you didn't have to spit on me after," Laney laughed, "I've never seen anyone that angry in my whole life."

"Oh, Lane, the couch is a pullout," Jason pointed out. Laney got up and looked at the couch.

"Oh, it is," Laney replied as he moved Jason's coffee table and pulled the couch bed out. "Turning in?"

Jason nodded. "Goodnight, Laney."

"Night," Laney replied.

Laney lay awake for a little while after Jason went to bed before sending a text to someone. By the time Jason woke up, Laney was gone.

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zalrb · 2 months

Text

OTH Rewatch Review 3x07

IIIIIII DON'T WANNA BE ANYTHING OTHER THAN WHAT I'VE BEEN TRYNA BE LATELYYYYYYYYY

Jesus Christ

So, like, here's the thing about this fucking Inception dream sequence. What is happening? Is Nathan dreaming about Haley making out with Brooke after waking up from a nightmare about Lucas and Chris in bed together after Lucas woke up from dreaming about being in bed with Brooke? Because it's a dream within within a dream. I don't know what your subconscious is like Nathan.

Nathan's grin. I mean, technically you've slept with both of them. AND HALEY'S SISTER.

"What is she doing talking to that troll?" "By troll do you mean Peyton?" Oh, Haley. How I love you sometimes.

Because Peyton fucking SUCKS.

"I'm over possessive-best-friends-with-weird-lesbian energy. And Haley!" That was actually a good delivery but if anyone has the lesbian energy here, it's Brooke and Rachel.

"Well, at least somebody wanted me." Oh, preteen Zal was SO frustrated with this ENTIRE storyline.

"HALEY, YOUR BOYFRIENDS ARE HERE." lol.

"You look so..." "Overdressed." Good delivery. But also Haley, my girl, the SUN is out, why are you wearing a little black dress?

I mean "little black dress" this is still OTH.

They really felt uncomfortable in the clothes they had to wear??

This is so dumb, she's clearly going out with Nathan and Haley too, Lucas.

YOU ALL HAVE CELL PHONES. CALL HER.

Ugh, Skills.

"I've been on kinky dates before..." with who? I guess s1 Nathan would've done something weird.

Remember how s1 Nathan was like a legit emotionally, verbally abusive villain?

"Let's spring [the senior in the nursing home]! It's just a couple of hours, what harm could it do?" If this was a dark comedy, he'd die.

Chris tipping a random woman on the beach and slapping her ass is just ... ugh. She should've slapped him. Alas, Mark Schwahn.

Haley having a quiet but profound breakdown. Brooke, "It's OK. Let's just go to the mall." And she is being helpful and it is very sweet but that's also hilarious. Uhhh, sorry that your wedding spot is being destroyed, let's just go to the mall instead. You know? Nothing profoundly sad happens at the mall.

"I can't believe she's doing this." IT WAS A GROUP DATE, LUCAS.

"This guy has caused a lot of trouble, Brooke knows that." Lucas, the people that he caused trouble between WERE WITH HER GETTING INTO THE CAR. YOU SAW THEM.

I swear to god Lucas, I would hit you. SHUT UP.

24. Braley are such better friends than Breyton.

25. I REALLY wish we got more Nathan and Brooke scenes because they had a really fun chemistry together and I liked that they were both being courted by Haley and Lucas and they could both understand where the other was coming from

26. Haley's laugh at Chris saying "Maybe he's afraid of me" is hilarious because she stops and continues. But Chris shutting her up with "Maybe he doesn't care anymore" was mean but well-played.

27. It's funny how Chris Keller is a better Damon than Damon. Because he's not a good actor but he doesn't overplay it.

28. Aww, jealous Nathan

29. James Lafferty's shoulders are quite broad this episode.

30. Nathan is vulnerable and you were practically giving the enemy a LAP DANCE. I mean she wasn't Brooke but the exaggeration is very Brooke and also very high school. I remember in high school we were at a school dance and this girl's boyfriend was getting jumped outside while she was dancing with another guy and all of us girls were like WHAT THE FUCK??? [INSERT NAME] IS GETTING JUMPED AND YOU WERE BASICALLY HAVING SEX ON THE DANCE FLOOR! What did we expect her to do? Get jumped with him?? Teenagers.

31. "I didn't do anything!" "Except for kiss Chris and run away with him?" I mean, she's got a point Haley. "What about you messing with Lucas and hiding all those letters you wrote to him under your bed?" I mean, she's got a point Brooke.

32. "I know this is where we made love in the rain." I mean, it wasn't ON the balcony though. It should've been.

33. "I still feel our past just like you do" well especially considering that you were the one who was left.

34. Rachel calling Lucas gay because he's CLEARLY into Brooke and is like please stop getting naked around me because I LOVE BROOKE is hilarious because what?

35. Chris also getting Brooke more and more drunk so they can have sex is incredibly gross.

36. "All of the celebrity..." she had ONE original song and was doing covers and opening for actual celebrities? WHAT ARE WE TALKING ABOUT HERE?

37. We could also talk about the fact that Nathan was the one who encouraged her to sing in front of people etc. etc. and she wouldn't have been a "star" without him in her life at all.

38. Mouth's reveal that Mel is his grandfather is ... OK? I know this is supposed to push Peyton to Ellie but meh.

39. "SHE NOTEBOOKED YOU?" "I totally Notebooked him" lmao these references.

40. Nathan keeping a flower from the beach is Lucas keeping a feather from Brooke's wings.

41. *SIGH* Brooke and Chris. What, it takes like two more episodes for them to be together?

42. I also absolutely do not believe that Brooke wouldn't have kicked Chris out of the house right after sleeping with him. She'd be disgusted.

#rewatch

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meraki-yao · 3 months

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You don't have to post it if you don't want to, you can also block me or delete it's ok, I just need to vent because this situation is hitting rock bottom and I can't stand how people don't want to see the problem:

In short: there is a video of the q&a where the female producer gets Casey pronouns wrong when talking about them. It's totally ok to point this out and give respect that Casey deserves BUT who was given the main blame? Taylor obviously, despite him also using the right pronouns during the panel, is guilty of not correcting the woman in front of everyone so he's bad again.

But this time we're not talking about that handful of idiot Nick fans, we're talking about the rwrb fandom that says they love him so much but once again for the umpteenth time they threw him under the bus without thinking twice even though he had no fault. And it will be the third time that the same fandom has exaggerated something against him, subsequently causing serious problems ( like racism and homophobia and doxxing which took place in december where everyone then washed their hands of it pretending nothing happened and they did nothing wrong)

And I'm so tired of reading that we just have to ignore that social because that social is the most active and followed and we know Taylor a few days ago saw stuff and posted and today Casey saw and posted a story. That social causes damage and everything they bring there is seen and affects all of them. So no it's not enough to ignore and put our hands over our eyes and just talk about how beautiful the sky is and I'm so tired and sad and heartbroken because every day even unconsciously they make it more and more evident that there isn't the same affection and respect for both, it's not true, one will always be seen with a critical eye "yes you are beautiful, perfect, so sexy, wow how beautiful these photos BUT you are a bit problematic, BUT you should be better than that, BUT you should learn better, oh disappointed but not surprised" and it is obviously always the poc man who has to be better who has to do better even when he does absolutely nothing wrong.

And this comes from the people who say they follow him and love him. It's no longer possible, that man has been attacked every single day for months, now he must also fall into the transphobic category because he didn't correct another person in front of everyone even though HE had used the right pronouns. But do we realize that this shit fucks up your mental health in the long run? But why doesn't anyone realize how serious the situation is? I cannot take it anymore and I feel like I'm screaming into the void and witnessing the moment when everything will get worse and fall apart and then we will be here sad because it didn't have to go that way for him

…Woah.

Jesus Christ what the fuck.

Okay um, here we go. This is a monster of response to write but here I am.

I’m gonna start by saying I am not a direct witness of any of this. I didn’t know about the misgendering issue during the Q&A, I didn’t really notice it when I watched the Q&A myself yesterday. I’m not on twitter and I don’t follow or look at Taylor or Nick’s tags. All insults I seen regarding the boys are either from assholes trying to bother me or from people who want to talk about the phenomena, both in my inbox.

Regarding misgendering Casey:

Firstly I’m gonna state the obvious and say of course it’s a bad thing to misgender someone. Don’t do that

However I will also say this.

In regards to the extent of reaction: it’s not always done in malice. And in this case, I think it’s a genuine slip up, which happens. I had to consciously remind myself to deliberately use the right pronouns after my friend came out to me as non-binary. I had to correct my friend using the wrong pronouns when talking about our mutual non-binary student. It’s not ideal, but it happens. It’s not mean, it’s just careless. And please note that I’m not saying it’s ok to misgender someone, no it’s absolutely not but I also don’t think this case calls for a big reaction. If someone maliciously, deliberately, publicly and repeatedly misgenders someone, that’s problematic, that should be called out by the masses to this extent. This, we should acknowledge, make a note, and move on. I think there’s some cases where the reaction to certain issues are massively disproportional, this is one of them.

In regards to Taylor not correcting Sarah and being targeted for it: Firstly, Taylor didn’t misgender them, Sarah did. Taylor used the right pronouns. In fact when they hung out in New York last August, Taylor used the right pronouns on his Instagram story. Secondly, he might not have picked that up. Thirdly, even if he did, it’s awkward to suddenly cut off a monologue, let alone one from friend or not, is someone on a higher level than you, to correct a mistake that doesn’t directly affect comprehensive. Fourthly, bystanders are encouraged to step into situations, but they’re certainly not obligated to. So placing the blame or putting so much blame on Taylor is ridiculous and unfair.

In regards to Casey’s Instagram story: I understand where the connection comes from but honestly… I think there’s also a possibility that that’s just a post that Casey saw and wanted to share without reference to this issue. They don’t have Twitter, and it’s been several days since the screening. Truthfully, everyone involved seems really friendly with each other, and how this very project is advocating for LGBT rights, I don’t really believe that if they were aware of the misgendering, they wouldn’t apologize to Casey.

So replying to the “You don’t have to post it…” anon, I agree that putting any blame on Taylor is kind of ridiculous in this case, just like what happened in December. I think there’s a portion of “fans” that are fucking around with this and genuinely hurting him, but there might also be a portion of people who have a problematic/complicated perception of this type of situation, and it’s not targeted specifically towards Taylor. Either way I disapprove with what they’re doing, but here’s a hypothesis.

Regarding the damage these stuff causes:

I’ve addressed the insults thrown at Taylor multiple times by now. And I kind of agree with “I hate that there are idiots…” anon that really disgusting insults thrown at Nick tend to be overlooked, it’s not like there’s no Nick haters, there is. But because of the inherent racism, attacks on Taylor are much more obvious. Either way it’s cruel and disgusting and the boys don’t deserve to be thrown insults like that, nor do they deserve to have people enact cruelty in their name. Rarely is anyone deserving of that, and in the case of these two boys who have been proven to kind and wonderful people, it’s definitely wrong.

I’m tired of reading and seeing these bullshit on social media as well, which is why I actively avoid it, but “You don’t have to post it” anon, I definitely understand and share your worries of this fucking up the boys mental health.

But the sad truth is that we can’t decide what he can see and what he can’t. We’re just gonna need to trust him, to believe that he knows how to regulate the exposure of response he gets, that he knows what comments matter and what don’t, that he knows how to take care of his mental health. He actively avoids twitter, so I think he has an idea on what he can engage with an what he shouldn’t. Same goes with Nick, all we can do is believe he knows his mental health and how to regulate it. Meanwhile, those of us who aren’t assholes, we’ll show them all the love we have for him. I think public figures all struggle with this to some extent, so when they stepped into this career, I believe they saw this as a possibility, so they’re prepared to some degree. That doesn’t make any of this okay, but again, ultimately, we’re not people directly in their lives. We can’t do anything else practical.

Ultimately I want to say, be kind, compassionate and considerate. We can’t control what others do, and truth be told when it comes to the majority of the haters, I don’t think calling them out will change anything. They have their mind set. So the best we can do, is manage and control what we say and do, and to some degree, what we see and engage with.

#rwrb #red white and royal blue #rwrb movie #taylor zakhar perez #nicholas galitzine #casey mcquiston #anon ask #answered #oh god this took a lot out of me

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pussyistheforbiddenfruit · 1 year

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This is why I can't trust myself to date bi women anymore, I really wanted to but from what I have seen both in real life and online they don't take their same sex attracted side seriously and I honestly wanted to believe when they said they did, but their actions contradict their words. There are even statistics that prove this shit.

All of the bi women I met in real life ended up with men they were the ones who tried to convince that I'm "not really" a lesbian alongside the hetero women in my life and as a young lesbian in hurt like hell especially when it comes from loved ones. Shit even my ex bisexual girlfriend told me that i wasnt actually gay and i'll grow out of it too like wtf?

Why are so many ppl convinced of the existence of biphobic lesbians but not homophobic bisexuals? if one can exists so can the other. So why you guys get to talk about mean biphobic lesbians but we can't about you guys? Your the ones who pretend to be lesbians and sleep with dudes, your the ones who are "ex lesbian christians" , you the ones who are the unicorn hunters and so much bullshit but we can't talk about it?? Why the hell not? Lesbians have every right to call it out.

Also stop blaming "straight" and bi curious women for this shit when it's clearly you guys doing this shit too, jesus christ.

#lesbian #bi women #lgbt #bihet

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cherry-velvet-skies · 1 year

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It is time for the finale of the Beatles Era Ratings series ❤ This series was so fun I don't want it to end lol

Episode 4: Paul McCharmly 😁 And as of now all four parts are available in my Masterlist if you haven't seen the others 🥰

Archie Comics Character (Pre-Beatles Era)

Tell me he doesn't look like a 50s/60s cartoon character

Simultaneously looks 18 years old and 8 years old this kid's a fucking wizard

He has the vibe of those people who seem super cool but talk to them for too long and they get real annoying real fast

4/10 his only skill is his seemingly endless inventory of cheesy pickup lines

Petulant Schoolboy (1962)

Resting Pout Face ™️

There is a certain level of entitlement radiating from this image but we don't have time to unpack all of that

Looks the same as practically every other kid his age but still thinks he's the best looking one

5/10 is cute until he opens his mouth

Undercover Ken Doll (1963-66)

His appearance has not changed since the beginning of the Beatles

Looks identical to his Beatles cartoon counterpart and no I'm not wrong

This man is one minor inconvenience away from throwing a full-blown tantrum

6/10 though I'd be lying if I said I didn't find him the least bit adorable

Teen Caught With Fake ID (1967)

Never have I seen a real mustache look so fake in my entire life

When people who work at convenience stores tell stories of underage people who come in trying to buy alcohol, this is the people that come in

He's 25 and he looks 15 I hate it here

3/10 maybe next time don't let your LSD trip determine your facial hair pattern

Understandably Conceited (1968)

Very similar to Undercover Ken Doll but there is something different here. Something...better

Beautiful and he knows it

His eyelashes are longer than mine what the hell am I doing wrong

9/10 he's a 9 but he gatekeeps his skincare routine

McBeardy (1969-70)

Jesus Christ do I even need to say anything

The only other exception to my "I hate beards" rule

The mustache cannot stand on its own it must be accompanied by the beard

1000/10 I want him to fuck me just so I could forget about my problems for a while

No (1971)

How did we go from McBeardy to t h i s

You really thought that having beard hair longer than the hair on your head was a good idea? I think the fuck not, James.

Every time I think about Paul's style evolution I desperately try to delete this one from my memory

0/10 I actively despise this

Hot Dad at a Pool Party (1972)

Well at least the beard is gone

The title is exactly what I mean. I have no other way of describing this look

His hair is a little shorter than I feel is the ideal length for him but it's not bad

7.5/10 it's enough to make me have a crush on him, but it would be nothing more than that

Baby's First Mullet (1973)

Looks cute but also concerningly sexy

I hate that I like this but then again rockstar mullets are different than regular mullets so I have nothing to be embarrassed about

His eyes are so big how does he do that

9.5/10 if I saw him at a club I would definitely wanna sleep with him

The Eighth Circle of Hell (1974)

And we're back here again I am in AGONY

The trainwreck of a mustache ON TOP OF THE MULLET? I am at my fucking limit.

This is the face of a man who has done his fair share of cocaine

12598347/10 I had it at a 2.5/10 at first and the only reason I changed it is because there is some sick twisted part of me that's attracted to this and maybe that's why I'm so angry about it. I thought about my rating overnight and ended up having a dream that we fucked and he looked like this and it was so hot. My affinity for skrunkly men is one that both comforts and deeply disturbs me.

Mullet Yoyo (1975-78)

No matter how long or short the mullet got it never left

At least the mustache is gone I can't take having to face my most embarrassing turn-ons anymore

To be honest he somehow looks more unhinged with just the mullet

7.5/10 my brain doesn't like it as much without the facial hair oh my god Cherry what the FUCK is wrong with you

Intermission (1979-80)

It's not that I don't like this. I just really have nothing much to say about it

Sort of a middle ground in between the chaotic energy from the 70s and the dilf energy of the 80s

He looks handsome I'll give him that

7/10 I certainly have nothing to complain about

Give My Regards to Dilf Street (1981-85)

Oh shit here we go

His hair got longer and none of us knew how to act

When I say I watch the Broad Street movie for the plot, this is the plot

3000/10 this man is a frequent visitor of my sexual fantasies

Warden at Horny Jail (1986)

I'm- 🥴

Nobody talk to me

This is the epitome of dilf energy it's not even a competition

36459871/10 please just fuck me already

Questionable Choices (1987-88)

He cut his hair I am in shambles

Paul why

He doesn't look bad but obviously the long hair is way better

5/10 I don't hate it but my heart belongs to another

The Swan is Gliding (1989-97)

The dilf haircut is back thank god

Paul you have redeemed yourself

He looks unbelievably sexy but for some reason it's missing something that he had in '86 and I don't know what it is- oH MY GOD HE DYED HIS HAIR THAT'S WHAT IT IS

1000000/10 it's still one of my faves but COME ON PAUL YOU'RE A DILF FOR GOD'S SAKE YOU NEED TO EMBRACE YOUR GRAY HAIR YOU'RE A SILVER FOX BABE PLEASE

Time Traveler (1998-2003)

He started looking real old real quick

But of course I will not be harsh with this era because I know it was a super tough one for him

I know all too well that when you're super stressed out, your appearance is the furthest thing from your mind

5/10 honestly he just looks like a typical guy in his sixties so there's nothing to bash anyway 😊❤

Lead Role in a CBS Crime Drama (2004-10)

This pic just gives me NCIS/Criminal Minds cast photo vibes idk

Again I mean this in the best way possible but he looks like just some guy and there's nothing wrong with that

A suit will always be sexy to me though

8/10 I have a certain appreciation for this one

Main Character Energy (2011-16)

This era of Paul was the moment

His hair is longer again and yes I do think he looks very sexy

A majority of the music he released in this era is just *chef's kiss*

10/10 this photo is from the promo for the NEW album which fucking slaps btw it's honestly one of my favorite albums from his solo career

Hey Grandude (2017-19)

I'm sorry I just had to name it that I think him using it for a children's book title is too cute

The gray hair is coming back and I very much do think it suits him

This is not so much "just some guy" but more like "a guy who aged beautifully"

9/10 if you told me he was approaching 80 years old I would not believe you

Eternal Rockstar (2020-Present Day)

Oh my god shUT UP

I have to say dilf. Do I have to say dilf? I feel like I have to say dilf

Don't dye your hair anymore babe you don't need it

10000/10 I had to choose this photo it taunts me too much 🥵

#1974 gave me an existential crisis that i would like to never experience again dear lord #I saved Paul's for last because I knew it was going to cause me the most emotional damage #Out of all things I had to prepare myself for...having to accept the fact that I'm down bad for an 80 year old man was not one of them #paul mccartney #james paul mccartney #the beatles #beatles #george harrison #ringo starr #john lennon

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hecatombi · 7 months

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001. MISC. PHYSICAL HEADCANONS

(( here is a bunch of miscellaneous physical headcanons i have about the guys, going from the ones with the least changes to the most! Vash and Chai .. are going to have a lot more due to the nature of my insane fixation on them. ))

👇THIS IS A LONG ASS POST! YOU'VE BEEN WARNED.👇

ASH WILLIAMS

Ash has five different prosthetic hands, and several chainsaw stumps to attach to his hand.

He prefers to keep his hair as swoopy and voluminous as he had it in army of darkness ( even old ash. sorry ihate his slick combed back look )

GARY GOODSPEED

Gary naturally has heterochromia and blue + brown eyes, but after his possession by invictus, they are a striking bright pink. and it's permanent! Here's a ref i drew of him with them.

Post invictus, he grows his hair out and wears a far more complicated outfit. Like the concept art for the FS graphic novel.

JOSEPH JOESTAR

On top of having a prosthetic right arm, Joseph ALSO has a prosthetic left leg. This is because of the fact that LAVA HIT HIS KNEE CAP IN THAT FINAL BATTLE WITH KARS THERE IS NO WAY THAT DIDN'T DESTROY IT BEYOND REPAIR!!!!! So, double amputee.

When he is upset or mad, Joseph's hand clicks and wriggles around every joint independantly, and it is typically the only tell that he's angry or upset in any way if he's trying to hide the fact.

Joseph's arm was made by the SPW. not. who they're from in canon. <:) On top of that, it has several different functions, and a different appearance from canon. There are 5 star shaped buttons on it with varying uses. I.. still need to decide them, though.

He is NEVER ever seen without the remaining burnt headband of Caesar's. Ever. A common stim he has is twirling the ends of it.

CHAI

Now, i have a big ol' about page coming for Chai soon, but let's start here.

To get things out of the way; Chai has HORRIFICALLY poor vision. He refuses to get glasses though, because he is certain it makes him look like a nerd. He really, REALLY NEEDS THEM though. He's more farsighted.

Chai always had arrhythmia and other heart defects before his surgery at Vandelay. On top of that, he did not have mobility in his left arm at all, which is why he went in for the arm surgery. They told him they'd help with his heart too, but ...

.. the MP3 player + core replaced his heart entirely. And also gave him top surgery for free, even though he'd been too poor to afford it, as his breasts got in the way of the core. However, his top scars are more than just that; there are thick scars, branding him with the vandelay logo down his entire torso, becauuuuse...

His insides and organs had to be reworked to physically accept such a drastic change to his body. I'm talking moved around, and more than just his heart and arm replaced with robotics.

He straight up is an eldritch, terrifying mess of organs and wires in there. He doesn't know how much of him is robotic and how much is organic anymore. I draw this from the factt hat when electrocuted, Chai's skeleton shows up -- but his skeleton also includes the magnetic waste management tool in his arm, as well as the fact that the things he survives physically NOBODY ELSE CAN. AT ALL. like jesus christ he is somehow so resilient to things literally nobody else in game is under the same circumstances. Also, his body and brain can be hacked directly from his arm. You can't do that with organics, only tech.

So... that's why I think he's more robot than person now. Or cybernetic, if you want to get technical. W/e

His life span has been extended by an unknown amount, and he will age significantly slower if at all due to this change in his body. Oh, and the outer shell of the arm is made of a compound that is not metal. Dont know what it is, but it's still just as strong and durable.

It is possible for Chai to sync with other robotic beings in the same way he synced with 808( his cat ); you have a 50/50 chance of hearing the music that always plays in his head forever, like 808 now does, OR hearing the world moving to a musical beat for the rest of your life. Until he dies, anyways -- if / when he does.

His music core is shown to thump and beat like a heart, and if it pounds hard enough, it's enough to jerk his chest and cause him to get a little dazed-- it's definitely uncomfortable when it thumps so hard. I think he watches it cause he's nervous if his heart is fucking up or something, given that was a BIG health anxiety his entire life. Only 808 managed to snap him out of it, as you can see here.

Speaking of that, post surgery? He LITERALLY can not process anything beyond music and beat he can not hear. For the rest of his life, he will always move to a beat nobody can hear; the environment makes music around him; you can see in this example here how everything in the environment and even his own movements fall largely to the beat of the song. See the video below for an example of this.

youtube

He will never be able to hear or see the world regularly again. Not that Chai minds; he LOVES music. Adores it, even. He'd be happy to live with this the rest of his life. Which is good, cause he really has to.

He picked up cat tendencies from 808 when they synchronized, just as 808 picked up chai mannerisms ( like the way he fights & love of rock and roll ). They often mirror each other because Chai is influencing 808's expression more than you'd think! They pretty much share a single braincell now.

And, to close it all off; the surgery also gave him insane durability, as already discussed.. but it ALSO gave him nuts dashing techniques, and an ability to jump to a ridiculous degree. He's a very sturdy man now!

VASH SAVEREM

Vash only LOOKS human, but as we know, he certainly ISNT. He's a Plant; an independant variety, which is exceedingly rare. Plants are strange fusions of literal plants, angels, and mechanical blueprints that all meld together to make a more techno-organic being.

Because he only LOOKS human, I have PLENTY of hc's about his body and form and how they actually differentiate from your typical human.

First and foremost; he's trans. ALL plants are born female, no exceptions, as said by canon; which makes vash canonically trans. Pretty cool, right? but, in canon, where he doesn't have this -- he has plant private parts ( flower based ) and one of his breasts left. He has no desire to bind or for top surgery, as his chest is small anyways -- but he lost one of them a long time ago. More about the state of his body later, but this is important to still note.

Now, his teeth. He has fangs that he has filed down to look smaller, but they are still pretty sharp. His teeth are NOT defined like a humans; it's like .. kind of a solid plate of metal for bone? Teeth? With only vague outlines of where they should separate.

His eyes are an unnatural piercing blue, which we already know; however, the reason he wears those big orange glasses may surprise you! They're actually marksman glasses, which are known to be orange; however, they also serve as a neutralizer to his eyes. If you look at his glasses head on, through them, his eyes look like a neutral blue-gray. However, if you take off his glasses, they're still a BRIGHTLY inhuman blue.

And yes, they glow in the dark.

In BLUE and UV LIGHT specifically, his plant marks will show no matter what. Though, in blue light, they're much fainter / mostly in the eyes ( and they make them glow as you see in the example below ), while in UV all light patterns are exposed. When he heals plants, these also become pretty visible -- but if he has too use TOO much of his angelic power, one of two things could happen.

He goes comatose and unresponsive for a short while; blank stare, unable to react or process anything around them. Sometimes he can snap out of it, sometimes he can't. It really depends.

His hair will brown or blacken. If you know what this means, have a gold star! If you don't, this means he is ACTIVELY shortening his life span and using too much of his power at once. When a plant's hair browns or blackens, it means they no longer have limitless energy.

Side note; since we see that since birth, Vash has had BROWN EYEBROWS ( whereas all plants are born with blonde hair and blonde eyebrows, and blue eyes, NO MATTER WHAT ); i have a headcanon that because Nai is based on a toxic albino plant that was never meant to live in the reboot, he subconciously saved Nai at birth. He was always the stronger twin in terms of health, where Nai was sicker.

Also .. despite his glasses being pretty normal marksman glasses, he can do this thing where he reflects everything in the environment BUT his eyes subconciously; it's a big tell that he's trying to stay distant and not let people read his next expressions. He often does this to distance himself or when he's being vague. It happens a bunch in moments specifically where he does that in show, so im adopting that as a little weird plant quirk he can do. Call it manipulation of light and reflection, I suppose, since he IS a plant...

He's way taller than he looks. He will keep continuously growing for the rest of his life til a certain point, to which his true height would be around 9 ft to 10 ft tall at the least when in humanoid form. However, as of right now, he is 7'5 in his natural body. Here's the fun part though; he actually SHIFTS HIS BONES and condenses his weight and appearance to look more humanlike, but that still leaves him at a hefty 6'5. Even despite this effort to appear smaller and more unassuming, due to the poor nutrition on Gunsmoke, nearly every human is much, much smaller than him. Unless they've been genetically and unethically modified, of course. Then they can get fucking giant . But, nobody matches his height on an average basis there.

when he's in his full 7'5 ( and growing!! ) form, his limbs are gangly, and too long. His eyes look Bigger, and his skin a little bluer; his fingertips get elongated with a black gradient like all his plant sisters. Example here.

His angel arm is something he does not bring out due to a great deal of trauma with that and knives; he does not have access to a full plant angel form. What he DOES have access to is a gigantic angel arm, and three pairs of wings; parts of his body transform into an eldritch mechanical angel kind of being, but not all of his body can. This is because of his twin, Nai / Knives having the other half. Had Nai never existed, Vash would have full access to his plant angel form. He is one of the most powerful plants of his kind with said angel arm, but ... he'd sooner kill himself than ever use it. There'sa a whole rant i have about how he feels having been forced to have it out, but .. that's for later.

Now, for this paragraph, heads up for y'all for mentions of starvation and body dysmorphia, over all bad condition of a body. The next red text you'll see is where discussion of this stops. as is pretty heavily established, Vash has a great deal of body dysmoprhia. He is absolutely letting his body fall apart at the seams, and frequently punishes himself for "failing" to protect people by starving himself, despite needing it to survive / have energy and heavily enjoying food. That is why he's so damn scrawny! Which is unfortunate, but he has so so many complexes ( shout i make a separate infodump about this too? ) tht this is just par for the course. Now, he could heal the scars and shit on his body faster if he wanted to, but he's pretty self conscious about it. He will let any humans hurt him if he deems it justified, and unforch, he usually does. He lets them beat him senseless, cut him up, shoot him -- nothing he couldn't survive, anything goes. his body is straight up canonically barely held together by thick staples and grates of metal over exposed muscle.

This is part of why he never takes off his coat, ever. Or those long sleeved shirts of his. I mean, he might to shower or clean up wounds, but...... very rarely does he do this. He just takes whatever beating humans give him cause he feels he deserves it, and deals with it.

Warning over!

With all the heavy stuff said, here's a few final short hcs.

He photosynthesizes some, and really enjoys basking in the sun.

He's a very light sleeper and rarely ever gets decent sleep. He's pretty much always exhausted, but never lets it show.

CAN'T EVER LISTEN TO CLASSICAL MUSIC. it puts him into SERIOUS triggered mode and gets him too panicked to think straight, even after Nai / Knives died.

His hair looks like normal hair, but it absolutely DOES NOT feel like it. It feels like really soft velvety flower petals, and will always keep this consistency.

He's got inhumanly amazing marksmanship, yet somehow, being drunk ( should he ever GET drunk ) improves it more. Yes, I stole this bit from 98 vash but i think it's funny and it's my interpretation so this is what i keep. ok? :)

And lastly ...

He stims by reloading and loading guns :3

Anyways, hope you guys enjoyed! Should I make a part 2 sometime? :p

#oops. i accidentally spent all day on this ... ahahaha #* fuckboy lip bites *#╰┈➤ 🎸 [ STUDY ] chai #╰┈➤ 🚀 [ STUDY ] gary #╰┈➤ 🪓 [ STUDY ] ash #╰┈➤ 🌿 [ STUDY ] vash #╰┈➤ 🌟 [ STUDY ] joseph

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