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ssa-sugar-tits · 4 years

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queen of hearts // chapter four

summary: y/n y/l/n was crushed when she found out about maeve donovan. heartbroken, she left her entire life behind. what happens when she becomes the most prolific serial killer the bau has ever seen?

prologue + series masterlist & taglist

content warnings: swearing, angst, implied/mentioned sex, restraints, blood, head injury, kidnap/hostage, alcohol, gunshot, murder

a/n: reader is a psychotic murderer. this is purely a work of fiction and if you or someone you know are experiencing homicidal urges, seek professional help immediately.

The room was filled with tension and an overwhelming sense of despair but no one said a word. No more hellish arguing, no irritatingly random facts, not even discussion to solve the case. Everyone worked on their angle of the case and despite the fact that no one would dare admit it, they all somewhat hoped that Y/N wouldn't be caught. Some hoped more than others but deep down they all felt a twinge of it. JJ walked into the room and spoke, startling the team and ripping them away from their thoughts and guilt.

"I've given a picture of her to the media, it's being circulated."

It pained her-- almost physically-- to have to hand over a picture of someone who'd been like family for so many goddamn years. She felt that she was betraying Y/N and that made her feel indescribably horrible.

"Now what? We just wait?" Morgan seemed to be the only one that really did want to stop her. Maybe he was angry that he hadn't seen the signs. Maybe he was angry that his best friend had just... left. Maybe he was angry that she lost herself so much. Maybe he blamed himself.

"What else is there to do Derek? Call me bad at my job- Hell, call all of us bad at our jobs but we can't profile her. Admit it, we're all biased. Too biased to think straight but there's no way we can give this case to another unit." Emily had always been so close to Y/N and was able to open up to her. Something she couldn't bring herself to do with most people. But you weren't most people, were you? Even with what Y/N could be doing, Emily doesn't have it in her to hate her. The sadness she was feeling must have shown because JJ squeezed Emily's hand and gave her a weak smile. And for the millionth fucking time, everyone stayed silent. Not even Spencer was saying anything and he is not the type to stay quiet this long. Believe it or not, that was actually one of the things Y/N had loved about him. Everyone rolled their eyes or cut him off but she loved to listen to him ramble. To everyone's surprise, she was always genuinely interested in what he had to say and that was one of the first things that made him fall in love with her. She never invalidated him or called him strange. Sometimes when she had a nightmare or experienced anxiety she'd even ask him talk to her about a random topic so she could focus on his voice until she calmed down.

"Your voice is like... honey. In my ears." Spencer wanted to scream with emotional torture building up as he remembered how she'd laughed when she said that and how he'd had smiled at her with nothing but adoration and love.

"That seems unsanitary Y/N."

"You're such a smartass."

"Am I?"

"Definitely. But it's ok. I love that about you. I love you."

"I love you too."

She'd planted a sweet kiss on his lips before laying her head on his lap and listening to the rest of his topic rant. Still basking in the memory of Y/N, a sharp pain entered his hand and he realized he'd dug his crescent nails into the palm of his hand. And in that moment, he couldn't help but think about how much he'd love to be holding her hand right now.

"Guys!"

They all turned to Garcia, the source of the exclaim, who was walking in with Hotch.

"A bartender downtown says he just saw a woman matching Y/N's description leave with another man."

"She's chosen another victim? Here?" Rossi asked with confusion written on his face. "Up until now she's only killed 2 people per state and knowing the BAU has been called in, why is she staying here?"

JJ stepped in,

"This place is special to her, she has history here. Y/N must have an endgame but what is it?"

"The profile says she'll take as many people as she can with her. Probably suicide by cop."

Derek had accepted the situation. So why did that hurt to say?

"Rossi will go to the bar and talk to witnesses. Reid and Prentiss, stay here with Garcia. JJ and Morgan, PD is surveilling the radius around the bar and setting up roadblocks, come with me to help them."

"There's no way I'm staying here." Spencer objected.

Stay here and do nothing? Like hell.

"Neither am I, what the hell Hotch?"

"Reid, Prentiss that's an order. You're not going."

They both started to argue again but Hotch had already left. JJ and Derek followed and Rossi stood up with to leave for the bar. Apologetic looks were shot at Spencer and Emily because they all know why they have to stay behind. They're the two closest to her, the two that wouldn't be able to keep their emotions from affecting them on the field. And with that, off they all went.

Y/N's POV

The second you get to his hotel room, your lips crash against the handsome stranger. Your next victim. He pushes you against the wall and you moan loudly. His hands roam your body and you pull back.

"Hey... Go lie on the bed and wait for me."

Panting and staring at you with lust, he complies. Of course he does.

For God's sake. This man doesn't even know your name.

To be fair, Spence didn't even know Maeve's last name. And he still chose her.

You walk over to the eager man on the bed. Your hot breath on his neck, you lean close and whisper to him.

"We're going to do things my way."

He moans and you fight the urge to roll your eyes at him in disgust.

"Yes ma'am."

Taking out a rope, you tie him up and you know he thinks you're just a kinky slut. That's what they all see, isnt it? Suddenly something roars inside of you. Forgetting your usual routine, you pick up the lamp on the bedside table and smash it against him. Crimson stains the bed and you drop it, shocked by yourself. Yes, you've done worse. But it isn't the act that's sending regret and nausea through your body, it's that you're devolving. You're losing control.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

Starting to panic, you take the unconscious man and check for a pulse. He's still alive.

Giving him a shower (much to your disdain) and change of clothes, you put his arm over your shoulder and walk out of the room giggling as you pass one of the housekeepers.

"Baby, you're such a lightweight! Let's get you out of here."

The housekeeper barely gives you a second glace but when she enters the room of the man you've taken, she starts to scream and you know you're running out of time.

Run. Drag him. Just hurry the hell up.

Finally at his car, you take him to the small studio you own downtown. No one can find you here. It's been yours for nearly a decade and you aren't stupid enough to have told anyone about it or put it under your name. Granted, you'd never thought you'd have to use it to hide out from the feds, it's still useful. After taking a look at the brightly colored wall in your basement, you feel a sense of sudden pain race through your veins. You used to be normal. You used to have a life.

The man is chained up, gagged, and bleeding but you can't even remember doing anything to him. What you need is numbness. They thought the other bodies were bad? Wait til they fucking see what you do with him. Pain shoots through your skull again and you wince and fall to the ground.

"Fuck. I- I need a drink." you stammer to no one in particular but yourself.

A wig and sunglasses make you look different enough from the woman being circulated to take the bus to a nearby gas station. Walking down the liquor aisle of the store, you hum a song to yourself and let the AC blow on your skin. Vision blurred, you bite your lip and taste the unmistakable strong metallic taste of your own blood. Still humming that fucking song. The song you'd danced to with Spencer in your living room before you'd made love for the first time.

"You cannot be serious!"

"Y/N! I can't dance."

"Oh come on. How bad can you be? Seriously, the songs going to end and it'll be too late."

"Yes, that's what I'm hoping for."

"Psh. Don't tell me Doctor Reid is scared to sway around a little."

"Shut up."

"Make me." you laughed.

With one playful look, you dared him to shut you up in the most passionate, sensual way he could. But instead he put his warm hands on your hips and swayed to the song. You melted into his touch and your breaths synced as you laid your head on his chest. His heart beat was steady and calming. One hand reached for yours and intertwined before twirling you and pulling you back in to dance. He'd held you until it was over and brought your chin up to his face. The kiss was so intense, so loving. He tilted his head and pulled you tighter to get as close as he could to you. His tongue met yours and your mouths bathed in each other's taste. Running a hand through your hair, you'd started to unbutton his shirt. He'd been taken aback at first but then picked you up and placed you in the bedroom ever so softly. Placing gentle kisses all over each other's bodies and undressing for the other, you made raw, breathtaking love for the first of many times.

"Hey lady! Get out of the way!"

"W-What?..." You tremble and realize you're crying on the floor of the aisle.

"I said get out of the damn way, some of us got places to be."

The man is clearly batshit drunk. Probably here to buy his next fix. Shaking and letting yourself actually feel your emotions, you stand and use the wall to balance yourself. The man that yelled at you curses to himself as his phone rings and he picks it up.

"Hell do you want? Thought you were still mad about Andrea."

Andrea? Mad about Andrea. Another cheater. Another liar. Right? It has to be.

Before you can process what you're doing-- how irrational it is-- the gunshot rings through the store and everyone turns to see the man before you on the ground, screaming and spitting blood. A mix of a laugh and a sob escapes you and you scream.

"Everyone on the fucking ground! If I see any cellphones, I'll shoot you just like this dickhead. Got it?"

Frightened people drop to the ground and you start to yell, incoherent bullshit again. You smash the freezer glass behind you and open an expensive bottle of bourbon.

You practically whimper having to take deep gasps in between words, but in a somehow still confident, fearless tone.

"Now let's have some fucking fun."

But what you didn't know was that the cashier in the front had sent a text 5 minutes earlier.

Call 911! The girl from the news, the Queen of Hearts. She's in the store.

What you didn't know was that the woman that recieved the text had called immediately.

911, what's your emergency?

What you didn't know was that the BAU was on their way.

#criminal minds #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x you #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid angst #criminal minds self insert #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds x y/n #criminal minds x you #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds angst #criminal minds fanfic #criminal minds fanfiction

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unecoccinellenoire · 3 years

Note

Hi! I don’t know if you’re still doing the prompts but could I suggest maybe an au of Freaky Friday where maybe it was Nathalie and Gabriel that swapped please?

Nathalie and Gabriel?

Now that would be a mess. But maybe actually one I can work with so let have a speedrun of that scenario

Gabriel stared up at his own face, “Why would it be an akuma?”

“I don’t know,” Nathalie hissed back at him, and from the disgruntlement that passed over her face when she spoke she was as thrown at how weird she sounded as him as he was, “but there aren’t exactly many other sources of random magical powers in Paris are there?”

“There’s Ladybug.”

“This doesn't fit in with any of the Miraculous we know about.”

“Well it wasn't an akuma.”

“What was it then?”

“Us!” Duusu trilled suddenly appearing from wherever the Kwami had been.

“Duusu,” Nooroo whimpered from behind his head, and really what was it about Nathalie’s hair that made it a magnet for Kwami’s.

Though his irritation gave way to anger as he realised, “wait, was this you?”

Then a knock at the door froze all of them, “Father? Um, I haven't seen Nathalie this morning so I'm just going to go to school.”

He opened his mouth to talk but Nathalie spoke first calling out to the door, “She's not feeling well. She’ll email you your schedule later.”

……......

“An act of selfless love?” Nathalie said, “Alright. I can work with that, Duusu spread my feathers.”

He couldn’t help but be distracted by the sight of himself blue and pink-eyed, and reached out to his face as if to check it was real. He wasn't sure the hair was a fantastic look but at least, “I'm thankful I'm not in your dress. I don’t think I’d pull it off.”

Nathalie flushed, and looked down, “I hadn’t even really thought. We’ll have to thank Duusu I guess.”

“I think you contributed,” he ran his eye over the tailcoat and slim trousers, “I can see Mayura in it. And your elegance.”

“My,” she blinked, “Thank you sir.”

“So what's your plan then?”

“The same as it's always been.”

“We can't make waste the Wish on fixing this,” and if they were using their original plan then as distracting as the image of Emilie and Nathalie together was, he could hardly just explain to his wife than he and his assistant had switched bodies and expect her to be ok with that, “we need it for Emilie.”

“I know,” Nathalie said, “which is why we get Ladybug and Chat Noir’s Miraculous, and then I make the wish to sacrifice myself for Emilie. That should work shouldn’t it? I know it wouldn’t be completely selfless but,”

“What?” The room felt suffocating and hot, and he thought he might faint and he hoped this wasn’t what Nathalie felt like all the time because of damage from the Peacock Miraculous. “That’s, how, what about that wouldn’t be selfless.”

“I wouldn’t be in pain.” Nathalie said, and didn’t seem to realise how her words felt like stab wounds, “and you’d be the one dealing with all the mess afterward; explaining my death, explaining it all to Emilie, explaining it all to Adrien. And I’d know you were happy and I wouldn’t have to,” she stopped herself, “it doesn’t matter. I think it would still work.”

“We’re not doing that. I’m not killing you because our blasted Kwamis have betrayed us.”

“We are forcing them to work against their natures.”

“You really think Duusu has a problem with what we’re doing?” He should have seen Nooroo’s treachery coming but Duusu’s did surprise him.

“No,” she exhaled, “I don’t think that’s where Duusu’s actions are coming from. Duusu has a,” she bit her lip in thought, “different way of looking at the world. I wouldn’t advise asking for my kwami’s reasons. But it doesn’t matter. This doesn’t change anything.”

She looked as if what she meant was obvious when it very much was not. “It does. This was never the plan.”

“I thought you were willing to do anything for her?”

“Not that.” He pressed his fingers to his temples, “Nathalie if I was willing to throw your life away I’d have commanded you to wear that Miraculous from day one. I have never wanted to hurt you, and I can’t lose you too, you’re the only thing that gets me through each day.”

“You wouldn’t be losing me too, you’d have her back.”

“It’s too heavy a price,” Nathalie was, she was his friend and his certainty and he didn’t know how he could look himself in the mirror, could look Emilie in the eyes, if he killed her, “We not doing that.”

“It wouldn’t work anyway,” Nooroo said, “it has to be the elder of you that performs the selfless act of love.”

He’d never seen what horror looked like on his own face, and even blue it was his own face, until that moment.

…......

“I’ve got it,” Gabriel reached forward and pulled the Miraculous off her, “You’re never using this again.”

He waited for this nightmare to be over, but apart from her transformation falling from him-as-Mayura to him-as-himself nothing happened.

It should have worked. He’d put Nathalie ahead of his goals. Ahead of Emilie. Shouldn’t that have solved the whole thing?

“You’re said that before sir,” Nathalie said.

If he wasn’t in her body, and overly aware of how he could damage it, then he’d have punched a wall. Stupid past him screwing it up for all of them. And he’d always known letting Nathalie use that Miraculous was a mistake.

……….

“We’re probably going to have to get dressed at some point,” Nathalie said, looking as if she’d stepped in something distasteful, “you’ve a zoom meeting later. I guess it’s lucky we were swapped with each other, so we can keep the business going.”

Lucky was not what Gabriel would call the situation at all especially when, “I can’t just undress you.”

She was his assistant. It was wrong for him to know what she looked like under her clothes in any more exactness than her measurements. And the longer he was in her body the harder it was going to be not to ever look.

His body must have blushed more today than it ever had before, as Nathalie said, “Maybe just. Don’t shower today.”

“I wasn’t going to,” otherwise he’d actually be touching her and that was wrong wrong wrong, “I will try and respect your privacy Nathalie.”

“I know you would,” she said looking at him with a trust he wasn’t sure he’d earnt, “you dress models all the time, this isn’t any different. OK, I admit I’m not model but I trust you to be professional about this.”

“You’re pretty enough to model,”

She blinked, “I don’t think I can agree but thank you. And, I’ll do my best to give you your privacy too.”

“I never expected otherwise,” Nathalie was always professional, “I know I can trust you.”

“Thank you sir,” she said before a look of sheer horror crossed her face, “oh god, I’m going to have to go to the loo as you.”

He felt a funny warmth in his stomach. “We’ll have to fix this quickly then.”

“Yes,” said Nathalie but she didn’t look any more convinced than before.

………

“I’ve another idea,” he said, and reached up to cup his own face, and tried to ignore how disconcerting the whole situation was he pressed his lips to hers or his depending on how one considered it.

Nathalie pulled away immediately, stumbling a few steps back, “What on earth was that?”

From the look of her she seemed to think he had some weird obsession with himself so he rushed to clarify. “I thought, you know, it worked for the heroes before to break the effects of akumas?”

“Sir,” she was speaking to him very slowly like he was a child, and it sounded more condescending in his own voice, “You’re not in love with me. So that wouldn’t work.”

Her dismissal of him yet again annoyed him. He was going to fix this. And he was going to get Nathalie’s respect back.

…………

“I’m going to Adrien’s fencing match,” Nathalie announced.

“What? Why?”

“I promised him I would. It’s in the schedule.”

“For Nathalie.”

“I cleared yours too sir. You can come with us if you want.”

“I need to work out how to solve this not waste time placating Adrien. You go if you want.”

“I will.”

As he watched Adrien’s joyful smile on seeing what he thought was his father he realised uncomfortably that Adrien hadn’t smiled like that at him in he didn’t know how long.

Perhaps he could spare Adrien some more time.

……….

“I’ve come to a decision,” Gabriel announced.

“Yes?” Nathalie asked with a raised eyebrow, “Have you found a way to fix this sir?”

“What? No. I’m going to invent a better bra. I never realised it but there’s so many issues with current designs, the straps keep falling down, and the underwire is uncomfortable and,”

“Have you somehow got it on wrong? It’s never bothered me.”

“How would I have got it on wrong? I’m not stupid.” Although admittedly Nathalie probably adjusted herself more than Gabriel felt comfortable doing with his assistant’s body.

Nathalie frowned, and he almost mirrored her, he hadn’t realised he always looked this severe. “Maybe you just have a lower discomfort threshold than me sir.”

“That does seem to be the case yes,” because he’s struggling to get through the door past the aches and exhaustion that Nathalie has apparently been lying about not feeling.

…………

“I just don’t know what we’re going to do Nathalie,” he said as he relaxed back against her after she caught him after another coughing fit. He’d always felt utterly insufficient for what he could do for her afterwards and no seeing it he felt almost more so.

“We’ll fix this somehow sir,” she said, “I’m sorry it was me. I know if it had been Adrien or someone else you cared for this would have been much easier.”

He turned around, “What are you talking about? I can’t see how that would be easier at all.”

Because there was an obvious thing he could do to fix this at least and he couldn’t think what would be obvious in Adrien’s case.

Not that he could do the obvious thing so knowing it didn’t really help but….

…………..

Because he can’t pretend the toll this is taking on her isn’t obvious now. Not when he’s the one feeling it.

And the thing is. It’s not all the Peacock Miraculous either. If either of them could break this spell then Nathalie would have already done it a hundred times over.

She’s ready to lay down her life for him. She’s already risked her health and her freedom. This isn’t her job.

This is him being unfair.

And he’s never cared much for fairness. After all. Life isn’t. But it feels different with Nathalie. It rankles. He doesn’t want to be the one hurting her.

……………

“Are you going to send out an akuma sir?” Nathalie asked.

He shook his head, “Not like this.”

……………

He reached out to Emilie’s coffin and tried to ignore how much higher it was.

“I’m sorry Em,” he said, “I think I might be a very selfish man. Can you forgive me?”

Are you alive?

Is this a betrayal?

Or is it just recognising reality?

…………

“Adrien,” he said and his son looks up with worry for whatever Nathalie’s going to say he’s forgotten but there’s affection too, and there’s nothing he can say actually. Not as Nathalie. Not when he knows the opinions on the matter he’s wrongly allowed his son to have. “Don’t worry.”

Though if he does this then it’s not so wrongly.

………..

He still doesn’t like Adrien’s friends but as Nathalie he sees them more often and as he sees how his son changes as he sees how he becomes more like Emilie at her very best he has to revaluate some of the choices they’re made, and whether they’ve been stifling certain talents of Adrien’s.

………..

Nathalie didn’t say anything when he sees him transformed, but her eyes say it all.

“I thought it was quite striking,” he said of the Butterfly wing dress, wrapped around her body he was wearing.

“No,” she said, “it is sir, I’m just not sure it looks very suitable for fighting.”

“It’s not.” He agreed, but I’m not planning to fight. Give me your Miraculous Nathalie. I’m going to akumatise myself again.”

“With both of them?”

“No,” he laughed, “but I’ll want it after and I don’t want to fight you.”

“Sir,” Nathalie asked, “What are you doing?”

“Trust me.”

And she does.

………..

He felt it the moment the spell breaks. True his akumatised form is androgynous compared to his transformation under the Butterfly Miraculous’ powers but he’d known it has changed nonetheless.

And then Ladybug purified his akuma and he could see it has.

“M.Agreste?” Ladybug asked, “How did you get Hawk Moth and Mayura’s Miraculous?”

“I don’t know,” he said giving thanks for the effects of his akumas, “I don’t remember anything.”

Chat Noir was looking at him oddly, “did you fight Hawk Moth?”

“I think,” he said deciding he could afford this much to avoid the embarrassment of apparently losing to himself, “this was what Hawk Moth wanted me to do.”

……….

Nathalie greeted him at the door, “Are you alright?”

“Never better.” He confirmed.

She pulled him in shutting the door behind him, “You gave up.”

“I did.”

“It fixed us.”

“It did.”

“Then,” she still looked shell-shocked, “that means, you gave up for me?”

“It wasn’t entirely selfless,” he said, “I’m rather glad it worked despite that but Nooroo thought it would. But, I’m not sure I’m ready to confront what all of that means. Not while Emilie’s still,”

“I’ll be here when you are,” she said with a grounding clasp of her hand around his arm.

#gabenath #gabriel agreste #nathalie sancoeur #fanfic #freaky friday au #bodyswap AU #prompt fic #short fic

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keenesbeans · 4 years

Text

Two Heads are Better than One

Requested by @amofbebbanburg: Hello! I know something to write 😝😝😝 if you haven’t written this already, how about a Spencer Reid x reader where they both are geniusses and both can get extremely involved in discussions and the team is always flabbergasted as they don’t understand a thing about them, except.. That Spencer and her have a crush on eachother and they make Spencer fonally act on it? Maybe some NSFW to it ❤

A/N: Takes place during season 5 and mentions Spencer being shot in the knee. Introduction takes place in season 5, episode 5 “Cradle to Grave” Sorry I went a little off of the request I had an idea and I ran with it, I still hope you enjoy!

Taglist: @amofbebbanburg @thatsonezesty13 @slutforthegubes @hazel-howell @rachelssafespace @lindaze

Requests are Closed!

Category: FLUFF and SMUT! (NSFW)

Couple: Spencer Reid x BAU! reader

Warnings: Oral sex (male receiving), penetrative sex, chocking, Dom!Spencer, degradation

Word Count: 2,889

******

"The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits."

-Albert Einstein

You were sat at the corner of Spencer's desk as he rambled on about a blog he had just found, you wouldn’t have stayed and listened cause the subject was boring to you, but you stayed because you loved to watch the first genius in the BAU ramble. Especially since he was shot you couldn’t spend a moment away from him, afraid that something like that would happen again.

You were happy to see Derek walk in to the office finally someone else that Reid could talk to besides you. But, before you could give Reid to Derek, he was questioning Reid.

“Reid, what did I miss?”

“Oh, man, you're not gonna believe this. Some moron just posted a blog called "what would Carl Sagan do?" Spencer completely oblivious to what Derek was asking him about.

“No, Reid, the case.” Derek asked him again annoyance clear in his voice. “What's the case?”

“What are you talking about? I don’t know about a case, do you know about a case y/n/n” Spencer now directed his attention to you. You shook your head no “Nope I didn’t hear about any new cases coming in.” You told the boys.

“These emails from Hotch.” "take a look at this, " "new case to review."

“Emails from Hotch? I didn't get any emails from Hotch,” Spencer replied back to Derek while he typed on his computer. “did i? Nothing.” Both you and Spencer were clueless about what Derek was taking about.

The whole time he talked you and Spencer shared questioning gazes between the two of you as you played with his crutches, him stealing them away from you before you hurt yourself or broke them.

Derek had walked to Hotch’s office before you could ask him what was going on you and Spencer just went back to talking about the blog, you both assumed that Hotch had asked Derek to consul on a case before it was brought up in front of the entire team.

*****

“Kristie Taylor, runaway, drug addict, Reported missing from Farmington, New Mexico 3 years ago. Yesterday, she turned up off a freeway Outside of Rio Rancho.” JJ had begin debriefing the team about their new case.

“Sexual assault combined with ligature marks on her wrists and ankles.” Spencer stated reading off of the case file.

“She was asphyxiated.” You shuddered as you stated that as you hand was brought up to your neck, you hated whenever victims died from this, thinking that one day it could be you. In the bedroom you were know as the kinky submissive type, completely different from the dominant personality you used at work. And one of the things that could always get you off was a little bit of breath play, choking, you just loved it when a man took complete control of you, when your life was in his hands.

Those hands, god you had to get over this crush on Spencer ever since he was shot you realized your feelings were more of the “I want you to absolutely destroy me”, then the overprotective family type that they other members of the team had for him.

Spencer shook you out of your thoughts as he mouthed to you “are you okay” you simply nodded your head “yes” and went back to listening to JJ talk about the case.

When you had tuned back in Rossi was talking about how “There are a lot of guys out there who like chains.” You giggled to yourself and girls too, you thought to yourself. Spencer was confused as to way the mention of chains made you giggle, but figured out the answer when he saw the way your pupils were dilated, the rising blush on your checks, and the way you bit you lip with desire.

He blushed to himself, trying to get the imagine of you tied up in chains for him and only him out of his head. He cleared his throat and tried to get rid of the growing bulge in his tight pants.

Rossi asked JJ “ Are we sure this is the same unsub?”

“Kristie Taylor's autopsy report also indicates a second connection between these victims.” JJ replied back to him

Spencer informing the team of the connection, “she was pregnant.” Flipping the case file closed as JJ said that she had just given birth, she was killed within minutes of giving birth.

You had a theory, “This unsub isn't your typical sexual sadist. Captivity and assault we've seen before. What we haven't seen is this signature-- The role he forces these women to fulfill before he kills them. Motherhood.” you told the team all of them looking shocked and terrified.

“Journalist William D. Tammeus wrote, "you don't really understand human nature "unless you know why a child on a merry-go-round "will wave at his parents every time around And why his parents will always wave back."

“So why would a sexual sadist make women carry his children?” Emily asked the team with absolute confusion as to the unsubs motive.

“Gary Heidnik kept a harem in a dungeon. His goal was to create a large family As a replacement for his own broken home.” Spencer answered then turned to look at you, you continued his explanation.

“Josef Fritzl kept his daughter in a cell in his own house, And they had several kids together.”

You and Spencer were always like this, you guys were known to finish each others thoughts almost as if you too shared the same brain. It was absolutely sickening how adorable you two were with each other when you would get into your genius debates, rattling factoids about anything to prove which one was smarter. They were always wondering when you two would finally get together.

And to be honest you had finally had enough of the back and forth of the will they won’t they and you had decided (much to Penelope's constant nagging) that after this case you would finally tell Spencer how you felt, and fingers crossed, jump his bones.

***** The case had finally rapped up after what had felt like forever and you were glad to step foot back into the bullpen, determination coursing through your veins as you eyes landed on Spencer.

“Hey Spencie want to get takeout and do a movie night?, I’ll even let you pick out the first movie” You asked him hoping that he said yes, but he usually always did Spencer could never say no to the puppy dog eyes you were know to give him.

“That sounds amazing,” He replied as he laced your arms together walking you towards the elevator “your place or mine?”

“Yours” If this plan was going to end in the way you hoped it did you wanted it to be done at his place. You wanted him to take you on every surface of his apartment. You felt yourself getting wetter at the idea and before you even realized it Spencer was opening the car door for you to get in, you blushed as you thanked him for being such a gentlemen and got in the car.

*****

You had made your way to Spencer’s apartment without exciting yourself to much, in case he didn’t return the same feeling of attraction.

You sat on the couch as Spencer placed your usual order at your favorite Chinese restaurant. “It’ll be here in 20 minutes” he told you as he joined you on the couch and he set his crutches down on the ground you gathered up some courage to place your hand on his knee.

“Does it still hurt Spencer?” You began to bring your hand up and down his leg in a teasing manner making sure not to put too much pressure on it.

“Umm no-o not that much only when I-i try to put too much pressure on it.” Spencer didn’t know what you were trying to do but, he was hoping that you were finally going to tell him how you felt.

“OK that’s good just tell me if this hurts”

“If what hur...” Before he could finish his sentence you straddled yourself on his lap combing some hair that had falling in his face behind his ears. You smiled deviously as you felt his growing bulge resting at your core, you moaned at the sensation.

And in that moment, Spencer had lost all control, the years of him holding in his feelings were finally able to be set free. He grabbed your chin bringing your face inches away from him. You felt his hot breath fan over your face, another moan escaping your mouth.

His pupils were extremely dilated, they were filled with lust and desire. “Is this why you wanted to do a movie night y/n, huhh?” He left one hand on your check as the other wandered down to your throat giving just enough pressure to make you a whimpering mess in his lap.

“Yes, Doctor” That’s all you needed to say to him before he captured your lips in a breathtaking kiss both of you moaning at the sensation of finally being together.

“That’s what I fucking thought.” Spencer manged to get out in between kisses.

Both of you exploring each others bodies like you both had dreamed about.

His hands now harshly gripping your hips and grinding you against him. You ran your fingers through his lengthy curls, tugging at the ends eliciting several moans from him. He begin to work his kisses from your lips down to your neck leaving love bites in his wake, marking you as his.

With every kiss and bite you were a whimpering mess for him, grinding your hips against his, your core was pulsating and you needed him so badly at this point it hurt.

You finally began to undress each other, the want of him being inside of you taking over your body. You stood up to help remove his clothes making sure that you didn’t hurt his leg.

“Are you able to hold yourself up against a wall” You asked him with a smirk.

“Yes”

You grabbed his hand and shoved him against the wall before getting down on your knees, you stripped yourself down to your bra and underwear. Spencer had to stop himself from practically cumming at the sight.

“You are so fucking gorgeous” He manged to get out in between moans as you began to palm his erection through his underwear.

Finally having enough of teasing him you grabbed his underwear and dragged it down to his ankles, him kicking them off. You were shocked at the sight of him.

His tip was pulsating red with pre-cum as it rest against his stomach, you had never felt more aroused then you were in that exact moment you couldn’t wait any longer, you had to feel him.

You wrapped your hand around his erection, staring to stroke him gently. You stuck your tongue out as you drug it up and down his shaft, bringing it up from the base to the tip. You looked at Spencer, having a feeling that eye contact was a turn on for him, he moaned at the sight of you, which only egged you on even more.

You finally wrapped your lips around the tip, giving it a kiss before you began to to take him in your mouth. You wanted Spencer to fuck your mouth and that is exactly what he did. You felt his grip on the back of your head tighten as he began to thrust rapidly into your mouth, you made sure to relax your jaw to allow him more room inside of you.

He guided your mouth up and down his length, him loving the control that you gave him.

“You fucking love letting me you use that pretty mouth of yours. Fuck, it feels so good baby, you are taking it so well, like the good, slut that you are.” Between the praising and the degradation you were soaking wet and just dying to feel Spencer inside of you.

You loved that you were the only one to see him like this, the complete opposite of how he acted in work. He never cursed, he barely had the courage to take control. But, in this moment he was in full control and both of you were high off the feeling.

Spencer was so close to the edge as much as the idea of cumming down your throat excited him he needed to know hat it felt like to be inside of you first.

You pouted as Spencer yanked you off of him, dragging you up by the hair. You know stood practically dripping from how wet you were on shaky legs as he had to hold you up as he wiped the spit from your chin and the tears that fell from your eyes.

“As much as I wanted to cum into the pretty mouth of yours I think we would both enjoy it much more if I come in your fucking cunt.” Each word made you wetter by the second, he pushed your ruined panties to the side.

He started with two of those perfect and long fingers, that slipped with such ease inside of me, he roughly finger fucked me. He had to hold me up with one hand as we made out like horny teenagers.

As he pumped his fingers inside of me he began to rub my clit with his thumb, he could feel how close your were, the way you were clenching around his fingers, you had stopped kissing him to preoccupied with the feeling of his fingers deep inside of you.

“Are you going to come for me, as I finger that tight pussy up against my apartment wall, for all my neighbors to hear. I want you to fucking scream my name as you moan. I want everyone to know who you belong to.”

As soon as the words left his mouth, you came hard and quick a sting of curses and the doctors name falling from your lips. He never stopped his assault on your pussy, he kept pumping his fingers in and out of you as you came down from your high.

“Good girl, so fucking responsive to me and the real fun hasn’t even begun.”

He lead you to his bedroom him climbing up on the bed first carefully as to not hurt his leg, as soon as he was situated he told you to take off your bra and underwear as he patted his lap.

As soon as you straddled him he gripped your throat making your eyes roll to the back of your head, as his other hand guided his length into you.

Your moans were echoing through the bedroom as he entered you, filling you to the brim completely stretching you out. “Fuck, you take my cock so good baby, so fucking tight.” He stated as he began to pound into you from below you ground your hips against him trying to keep up with his pace.

His hand still tighten wrapped around your throat he pulled you towards him capturing your lips in a kiss that seemed a lot softer compared to the situation that the two of you were in now.

“Fuck, Spencer you fill me up so good.” He moaned at your words only pulling you closer to him and thrusting deeper inside of you. You felt yourself coming closer to release as he groaned against your ear.

The hand from your throat was removed only to move to your bundle of nerves circling it, “I want you to come all over my cock baby, before I fill you up with my load. Understood?”

“Yes, Doctor.”

“Come for me baby,” he pleads as he feels his release is close. A hot panting mess, you still managed to scream his name as you came.

Spencer wasn’t far behind you still thrusting into with such force, your pussy tightening around him added to his orgasm as he came deep inside of you.

“Oh, god, fuck that feels so good baby.”

You two just sat there for awhile in pure bliss, both of you hot sweaty messes but neither of you cared. After a couple of minutes he pulled out of you you whimpered at the soreness that you felt, but knew that Spencer would take care of it for you.

He gave you a quick kiss on the forehead before he hobbled (since he left his crutches in the living room) his way to the bathroom to grab a washcloth to clean you up, you flopped over onto your stomach feeling completely drained.

You couldn’t stop the giddy feeling that coursed throughout your entire body you had never thought this moment was going to happen, especially with a co-worker that you fantasized about on a daily basis. You had finally realized you were also madly in love with this man.

Unbeknownst to you Spencer had felt the same giddy feeling as he stood just there in the bathroom staring at his reflection in the mirror with a smile that spread across his entire face. He had to realized the love he had for you and couldn’t be happy then to tell you.

*****

“Some love stories aren't epic novels. Some are short stories. But that doesn't make them any less filled with love.”

- Carrie Bradshaw

#spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid smut #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid #criminal minds smut #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds #bau team

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ourloveisforthelovely · 3 years

Text

In Love and Death Part 12

Harry Potter AU

Link to Part 11

Pairings: Regulus Black x Reader

Rating: M

______________

Regulus followed you upstairs to the bedroom with a pleased smirk on his face. He had wiped whatever bit of toughness that Harry had in him away. If the little git thought that Regulus cared for one minute what he had to think then the “chosen one” had another thing coming. At the moment, it was Regulus’ personal pleasure to make Harry regret ever being born. Sure they were on the same “side” but it didn’t mean that they had to like each other.

You closed the door behind you as Regulus gave you the small smile that he reserved for you alone.

“Why did you tell Harry to play in the street?”

You asked. Regulus shrugged.

“Well, darling, if he actually listens to me and goes to play in the street then he isn’t that smart is he? If he gets hit by a car...obviously he doesn’t know the concept of moving”

You shook your head, giving your boyfriend a disapproving mother-like expression.

“That’s mean, Regulus. I don’t understand why you two are so jealous of each other.”

Regulus sat down on the bed. He was not jealous of Harry and Harry was not jealous of him...well...maybe he kind of was. The only “jealousy” that Harry felt toward Regulus was because of the relationship that he had with you.

“He’s the jealous one. I’m just being my loveable self.”

Regulus attempted to justify it with a smile. He was pleased when you returned the smile. Shaking your head, you took your place on his lap with a leg on either side of his body.

“You’re only loveable to me.”

You replied as Regulus leaned forward for a kiss.

“Well then I am doing nothing uncommon now, am I? I’ll play nice when he does. The little git seems to fancy you in a less than friendly way. He’s lucky that I haven’t hexed him.”

You didn’t need much encouragement to eagerly kiss Regulus back.

“He’s wasting his time. I’m in love with you. The quicker that he realizes it the better off that he will be.”

You said, not pulling your mouth far from Regulus.

“So, what did you want to talk to me about?”

This made you pull away and sit back up. Regulus immediately began to regret his decision on asking what was so important. He wanted nothing more than to have some private time with you. It seemed like the private time the two of you shared seemed to be a series of quickies when both of you could sneak off.

“Evan let it slip to my grandmother about the potion and what we are trying to do.”

Regulus immediately rolled his eyes. After his less than cheerful meeting with your grandmother a few months beforehand, he wanted nothing more to do with Mrs.Rosier.

“Of course, he did. What are her terms? I know that she has some.”

You nodded as you reached out and slowly unbuttoned a few buttons on Regulus’ shirt. He raised an eyebrow, clearly wondering why you were trying to undress him to give weird news? Would this require him getting “buttered” up to accept?

“She thinks that if we are going to be trying to have a child then we should be married. Reg, you know how old school my grandmother is.”

Regulus had to agree on that one. Mrs. Rosier was extremely old school. She was the reason that Evan and Emily were married so young when you were born. It only made sense that she would shove this old school belief on her granddaughter. Regulus internally smirked at the idea of Mrs. Rosier stalking about the Rosier manor mumbling about her granddaughter being pregnant with Regulus Black’s bastard child. He knew he didn’t have to envision it, it was probably happening as the two of you spoke.

“Love, you already have my ring. I told you before if that’s what you wanted…”

“Is it what you want though?”

You interrupted. Regulus gave you an annoyed look before continuing.

“I don’t go around trying to make a child with someone that I wouldn’t want to be in my life forever. Y/n, you know that’s what I want. I don’t know why you worry about such things.”

You quickly got off of his lap and went to stare at the street below. Regulus frowned. What was going on? You didn’t act like this.

“So, what else did grandmama say to get you in such a twist?”

“That was it.”

You replied. Regulus stood up, running a hand through his hair before joining you at the window.

“I’m not an idiot, Y/n. Something else is going on and you know how I hate being left in the dark.”

You sighed and finally looked up.

“I’m pregnant.”

Regulus blinked a few times.

“You literally took the potion less than an hour ago and we haven’t even done anything.”

“I was pregnant before I took the potion, Regulus! I didn’t know...Tonks had me take a test just to make sure and it came out positive...how I don’t know. I didn’t tell Tonks that it was positive. I pretend it was negative and ran off before she could ask to look at it. For the record, we have been doing it a long lot lately.”

Regulus’ mouth dropped as he took in your words. You had to fight smiling at the confused expression that had taken over his face.

“Please say something.”

You whispered. Regulus immediately smirked.

“You may want to call that healer and ask for our money back. I don’t want the old bat thinking she fixed something that she actually didn’t do.”

You gave Regulus a displeased frown.

“I tell you that I’m pregnant and that is your response? Lovely...excuse me.”

As you turned to walk out of the room, Regulus reached out and pulled your body back against his.

“Don’t get mad. I’m sorry. Y/n, I’m happy...I’m thrilled actually. It just shows that we don’t need some magical help to be able to take the next step of building our life together. Also, this is another example of there being nothing wrong with you. I promise I’m happy. What about you? How are you feeling about this?”

You laid your head against his shoulder.

“I’m very happy. I just don’t feel very well. I see why Tonks was throwing up in the neighbor's bushes when she was pregnant. Regulus, I’m not ready to tell the others just yet.”

Regulus gently ran his hand through your hair.

“We don’t have to tell anyone until you are ready or at least until you start showing. We won’t be able to avoid it then.”

The following weeks passed without much excitement. Both Regulus and yourself were keeping your “condition” as secret as possible. If you started feeling ill, you would find some way to slip out of the room without being seen. You were honestly shocked that Tonks hadn’t picked up on it yet. Normally, she would pick up on any secret that you had before you ever got the chance to say anything.

Of course, this is the one thing that she doesn’t pick up on.

You thought. Part of you was desperate for your best friend to “figure” things out. You wanted nothing more than to have another party in on the secret.

The house had been mostly quiet since Harry, Ron, and Hermione returned to school. Regulus’ jealous mood had eased and your lover was back to his reserved self. You dreaded the day that Harry figured out what was happening. That was going to be one hell of a disaster!

Sirius, meanwhile, was headed to his room to find something to harass Kreacher about. As he walked down the hall, he stopped noticing Regulus sitting on the floor beside the heating vent. The expression on Regulus’ face was unreadable. Shrugging, Sirius walked into the room and sunk down beside his brother.

“We used to spend a lot of time sitting by this vent. I don’t think mum and dad ever realized we could hear right into their bedroom. We heard all of the yelling and screaming”

Regulus, just realizing that his brother was in the room, blinked a few times. He had been lost in his own world for the past hour and a half. For the past few weeks, Regulus had been watching you get sicker and sicker. It was beginning to wear on his mental state. He couldn’t help feeling a bit selfish for wanting a baby with you so bad that you had to be ill for it to happen. Sure, that was what most women experienced but you weren't most women. You were his and Regulus didn’t like seeing you ill.

“We never heard anything romantic”

Regulus finally replied. Sirius made a repulsed expression. The last thing that he wanted to think about was his parents having sex. Granted, if Walburga and Orion didn’t have sex neither Sirius nor Regulus would be in existence. That fact, however, didn’t make Sirius any less repulsed by the knowledge of his parent’s sex life.

“First, gross. Second, I think that stopped after you were born. I meant overhearing what they were talking about. We could hear what kind of trouble we were in when we misbehaved and come up with a joint story.”

Regulus remembered those days well. Those were the days when he and Sirius were best friends and caused joint chaos. For example, the day Regulus caught the drapes on fire and Sirius blamed it on Kreacher. Walburga believed the elf over her two children.

“One would think that they would have figured it out. Do you think that I will be a better father than our father?”

Regulus didn’t turn to meet his brother’s confused then stunned expression. Sirius blinked a few times before his mouth dropped.

“Is Y/n pregnant?”

Regulus nodded, not realizing what he was doing. With one nod of his head, he told the secret that he was supposed to be keeping to himself.

“I’m not supposed to tell you but yes….yes she is.”

Sirius was stunned. He didn’t expect it to happen THAT quickly!

“That didn’t take long. That healer knows her shit. Is this why you are sitting by the vent looking lost?”

“That could be the reason. The healer and her potion also did nothing. Y/n was pregnant before she drank the potion. She took a test the day that she drank it and it was positive. The doctor that we have been seeing also confirmed that she was pregnant so there is that too.”

Sirius couldn’t help but be a tad bothered that neither Regulus nor yourself had said a word to him. He figured that he would be the person that the two of you would come to first. As much as Sirius wanted to make a comment on it the expression on Regulus’ face stopped him. His little brother looked lost and close to losing what grip on sanity that he had. Regulus didn’t need to be talked down to like a child and Sirius didn’t want to end up being hexed for making a snide comment.

“Reg, you’re not dad and Y/n isn’t mum. You’ll do just fine”

Regulus finally turned to his brother.

“What if I mess up?”

Sirius smiled at that one.

“All parents mess up. Turn the control freak perfectionist off, Reg. Just do what you think is right. You know that I am here for both of you. So is Remus and Tonks and all of the others...they just don’t know it yet. How far is she?”

“3 ½ months”

Regulus replied, quietly. Sirius held a hand up.

“You meant to tell me that she has been pregnant that long and no one has figured it out? Neither of you had said a word?!”

Regulus smiled.

“We are good about keeping our mouths shut when we need to.”

Sirius crossed his arms over his chest like an impatient child.

“But I wanted to know. This is a big deal. I need to brush up on my being an uncle skills”

Regulus rolled his eyes. He wasn’t surprised by Sirius’ dramatic reaction. Regulus had already mentioned it to you about telling Sirius before anyone else. His older brother would probably be ecstatic to be the first one in on the secret.

“You know now. Don’t tell anyone else yet. Y/n won’t be able to hide it much longer. She’s starting to show. I figure if she can make it until Christmas that will be the time she says something.”

“But she not been sick or anything”

Sirius commented as he tried to think about any weird behavior that he missed. He couldn’t think of anything that raised alarm bells in his mind. You seemed like normal Y/n.

“Again, we keep our mouths shut when we need to. She’s only been ill a few times. I consider it lucky. She’s not felt well but none of the actual vomiting.”

Sirius leaned his head back against the wall.

“Wow, I am totally shocked by the level of sneaky that the two of you have reached. I won’t say anything.”

(meanwhile)

You stood in the kitchen “attempting” to prepare a chicken for dinner. Molly and Arthur were due back in a few weeks and you couldn’t be more ecstatic. You missed Molly’s cooking. Most of all you missed Molly doing the cooking. Cooking had to be one of your least favorite activities and clearly you had no talent in it. There had been many nights that you just threw out whatever it was that you tried to make and ordered take out.

“God, this is so gross.”

You muttered as you pulled the skin off of the chicken. A wave of nausea washed over you as the slimy skin came halfway off.

“Oh, fuck no.”

You snapped and threw the chicken down to wash your hands and possibly throw up in the sink.

“Are you okay?”

You quickly looked up to see Evan standing in the doorway. He was looking at you with a concerned expression that he seemed to be wearing a lot lately. Evan had calmed down his super sassy “I hate all of you” attitude and was somewhat tolerable.

“Yes, I’m just fine.”

You lied, swallowing back the urge to gag. Evan raised an eyebrow and looked over your shoulder to the half skinned chicken. Shrugging, he stepped into the kitchen and sat down in one of the chairs.

“I’ve never seen someone almost vomit from cooking a chicken. You’ve seemed ill a lot lately. Maybe you should see a healer?”

You shook your head.

“Nah, I’m good...just fine actually.”

Evan nodded and turned to a magazine that was on the table. He knew exactly what was going on.

“I know that we haven’t had many chats that have gone well. Whether you like it or not, you are still my daughter and I know a lot about you.”

“That’s nice.”

You commented, practically begging Evan to keep yapping. The more that he talked then you could focus on that and not your churning stomach.

“You should try peppermint. It works well for an upset stomach.”

You breathed in, hoping a nice deep breath would help your current condition.

“My stomach is just fine.”

You knew that you were being stubborn but you couldn’t help it. What if you started caring for Evan and he just disappeared or became a death eater again? You wouldn’t be able to handle that.

There was also the knowledge that you would have to explain to your child one day why their “grandfather” looked the same age as mummy and daddy. That was going to be one awkward conversation!

Evan, meanwhile, put the magazine that he was holding down.

“When your mother was pregnant with you, she would vomit anytime someone came near her with a raw chicken. She was sick all the time. It didn’t matter how many times I asked her if she was ill, she would always say no.”

Evan fought the urge to smile as you began to resemble a petrified deer.

“You’re pregnant, Y/n and I am just curious does Regulus know?”

________

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brywrites · 4 years

Text

Little Beautiful

Summary: In which Max’s art exhibit is a gallery of beautiful things, and Spencer Reid finds himself surprised by what it includes. Spencer Reid x Max Brenner

.......

Spencer Reid can name many beautiful things. He can talk in depth about the natural splendor of the Golden Ratio and why humans love symmetry. He can explain the history of the Venus de Milo and the Mona Lisa, recount the painstaking detail with which the Taj Mahal was built. He’s seen desert sunsets and shooting stars and the faces of parents reunited with children they thought they might never see again.

He loves all the great and beautiful things in the world. And nobody quite makes the world look as beautiful as Max does. She’s protective of her art, fiercely private about it, but the glimpses she allows him stun him. Then again, he figures he shouldn’t be surprised. After all, she’s beautiful.

Reid thinks he could never tire of looking at her. Her wide, brown eyes, her long eyelashes, the way her cheeks are painted pink each time he pushes her hair back from her face. Her smile just knocks him out. Her movements are graceful, elegant. And the sight of her bare body in the soft light of his bedroom makes him think that no word in any language could ever even hope to come close to describing this sort of perfection.

Everything about her puts a sunset to shame. Her laugh. The way she makes him smile on the worst days. The softness of her touch when her skin is on his. The warmth of her embrace. The kindness of her heart. There’s no doubt, Maxine Brenner is beautiful, in every sense of the grossly inadequate word.

But beauty has a way of reminding him of his own inadequacies. For all his love of lovely things, Reid knows the word is never one he could hope to claim. His face won’t ever inspire poetry. His hair is, at best, an unruly mess. His stubble is always a little scruffier than he’d like it to be. And while he managed to get physically stronger after Milburn, getting in shape didn’t quite happen. He can hold an unsub on the ground without worry, but he’s absolutely terrified each time he undresses before her.

But he loves her. Which is why when she hands him a flyer that reads, Little Beautiful, he knows he’ll say yes to whatever it is before she even explains.

“I have a confession to make,” Max says. “I didn’t want to tell you sooner because I was afraid I might jinx it, but now that it’s all official – I’m going to have an exhibition at Jolie Laide!” Jolie Laide is one of the District’s most revered contemporary commercial galleries, and Max is understandably over the moon.

“What?” he gasps. “When did this happen? How?”

“There was a call for submissions, and well I’ve been working on this idea for a while and I figured why not give it a shot? Spencer, they loved it! They actually loved my art!” she says, and the little hop of joy in her step makes him want to kiss her right there in the middle of the street. Is she even aware of how adorable she is?

“That’s incredible. I mean, I’m not surprised. Everything you do is incredible. But what’s the title mean?” he asks, pointing at the flyer.

“It’s a Van Gogh reference,” she says, and he smiles. Of course it is. The Dutch master will always have a spot in her heart, and in the small “Starry Night” tattoo on her inner arm. “Find things beautiful as much as you can,” she recites. “Most people find too little beautiful.”

She takes his hand in hers. Her hands are small and dainty. He could almost close his fingers around hers completely. It makes him think he must look so strange beside her, a mess of lanky limbs.

“I know that big parties aren’t really your scene,” Max says. “But the opening night is kind of a big deal and it would really mean a lot to me if you came.”

“Are you kidding me?” he laughs. They turn down the street to his apartment. “You’re my girlfriend. We’ve been dating for five months, three weeks, and five days. Of course I’m going to be there.”

“Well good. And tell your friends! The more the merrier. I think you’re really gonna like it,” she adds, with that mischievous sparkle in her eyes that makes his stomach flip.

“If you made it, I know I’ll love it.” Deciding the doorstep of his building is close enough, he leans down to kiss her.

Two weeks later, he finds himself standing in the lobby of Jolie Laide with the rest of his team. Many of them have decided to make a date night of the event, as it’s not often profilers have the excuse to attend a formal event. Reid shifts nervously from foot to foot as they wait for the doors to open. Somehow he still feels out of place in nice suit, wearing the “Starry Night” tie she bought him at a work trip she took to the MoMA. Everyone here looks so beautiful, and he feels like he’s playing dress up, like they’ll all be able to tell he doesn’t belong in a place like this. He’s all too aware of the way he hasn’t managed to tame his hair, of the way his shirt fits a little tighter than it used to, of the way the people around him exude an air effortless cool that he could never hope to.

To ease his mind, he takes comfort in counting the people waiting. They’re all here for Max, for the beautiful things she makes. The last time he was at a gallery opening like this he was standing in a sweater vest next to Gideon who was flirting with the artist while Reid tried not to stare too much at Lila Archer. The memory makes him want to laugh – how infatuated he felt at that time with her. And now with Max, he can’t imagine thinking such a feeling was love. It’s so different than the consuming warmth he feels when he’s with her, the way hearing her voice can bring him back down to earth when his mind moves too quickly, the way he he’s always hated touch but never seems to mind when it’s her. Rather he craves the feeling of her hand in his, her arms around him, her lips on his skin. He’s in love with her, and he’s in deep.

The clock strikes seven and the doors are opened. They step into the bright white gallery space. The moment he’s inside, he is in awe. He recognizes Max’s work immediately, and it’s everywhere. There are large canvas paintings of small objects that take up so much space. There are paintings that must be zoomed in, hyper-focused views of much bigger objects. And it’s all beautiful. Max’s work has the same mastery over colors as the Impressionists, but with contemporary details and precision. Her paintings don’t just look like something, they feel like something. There is a series of pieces of stunningly detailed school supplies – a crayon, a yellow pencil, a bottle of glue. They seem to reflect light, possessing colors far too rich for items so simple.

Max has made them lovely with her gaze, with her hands.

In one painting, a vibrant sunset is seen through a small window. In another, the trunk of a tree is made to look so close that the leaves the viewer stares up at are but a golden blur. Fruit, a butterfly’s wing, and a flower are made into a kaleidoscope of colors. He catches glimpses of familiar faces in portraits – her sister Michelle’s eye, her father’s hand, identifiable by his watch, holding a baseball with vibrant red stitching.

“Wow,” Simmons says, standing beside him. “This is amazing. I mean, I don’t always get art, you know? But damn. Max is talented.”

“She sure is,” Reid says. But he’s only half listening, because he’s taken in by it, by all of it. This is the world through Max’s eyes. All these little details, all the little beautiful things that she sees. And she has reflected them back to the world in a way that takes his breath away.

The unfamiliar voice of an man calls the gallery to attention through a microphone, and Reid makes his way back towards the entrance where all the guests are slowly gathering.

“I now have the pleasure of introducing tonight’s guest of honor, Maxine Brenner,” a man with tiny wire-rimmed classes says.

Reid joins the crowd, falling into place beside Garcia and JJ just in time to see Max walk over in a white lace dress. She is utterly radiant, resplendent. His heart quickens at the sight of her. She takes the microphone and thanks the man with a dazzling smile. “Thank you all for being here,” she says. “It’s truly an honor to share this night with you, and I’m thankful to Jolie Laide for the opportunity to do so. It’s no secret to anyone who knows me that Van Gogh is my favorite artist. He once said, find things beautiful as much as you can. Most people find too little beautiful. The concept for this exhibit was to find all the beautiful things that we overlook. I wanted to pay attention to their little details and find new ways to show the world what beautiful is and what it could be. Every painting is of something I’ve found lovely – whether it’s a natural phenomenon seen through a new lens or an everyday object that just needs someone to notice it or a person–”

She pauses and her gaze moves over the crowd until she spots him. And that mischievous glimmer returns to her eyes. “– who doesn’t realize how beautiful they are. I hope that tonight helps you all to see the beauty around you and in yourselves, and maybe encourages you to see things a little differently, and to find the world a little more beautiful.” As she bows, the room bursts into applause and he swells with pride. This is her moment, and she’s beaming, and he couldn’t be more happy for her.

He wants to go up and hug her, but a swarm of admirers immediately descends upon her with enthusiastic questions and curious remarks. This is her night. He knows that when she wants to talk to him, she’ll let him know. For now, he’ll let these strangers have their moment with her – he can have all of the time in the world with her. The team opts to take a break to help themselves to the refreshment table and Emily offers to grab him a drink, but he politely refuses. He wants to keep walking around.

He can’t help but smile as he does so, hearing the praise and wonder in the words of the other guests. Yes, he wants to tell them. Yes, she’s that talented. Yes, she notices things nobody else does. And she’s hilarious and generous and gorgeous and somehow, somehow I am hers. But how unsightly it would be of him, in his suit and crooked tie, with his messy hair and off-balance gait to interrupt these strangers reveling at the beauty before them. So he stays quiet, happy just to be here. Happy to have the privilege to even witness such beauty.

When he turns the corner, he’s grateful he declined that drink because if there were a glass in his hand, he surely would have dropped it. Many of Max’s pieces are gathered on walls or in corners in groups based on themes or subjects. And in this particular nook, he finds himself uncomfortably familiar with the face staring back at him from one of them. The same face he has stared down in the mirror a thousand times.

It strikes him – Max has painted him. Reid steps closer and realizes it’s not just one painting. The whole wall is him. There is a painting of just one honey-colored eye, gazing down. A hand on the spine of a book. His lips, slightly parted, just a little uneven. His shoulders and collarbone, the slope of his neck and the curve of his chin, a few wild curls visible in the narrow view of the painting. And two portraits where his face is fully visible.

The brushstrokes are so careful, the colors so soft. She paints him in curves and edges and tiny hints of unexpected hues. She paints him with such detail, as though she has tried to memorize every inch of him. She has painted him beautiful.

And for a thirty-six seconds he can’t breathe. He just stares. Because this is how she sees him. And she’s put it on display for all the world to see.

“There’s a level of precision in these that I didn’t see in the other portraits,” an older woman says to a young woman beside her. “I can’t explain it, but it somehow feels like they were more… lovingly painted.”

“Like she knew exactly how they should feel,” her companion agrees.

“The subject has such a striking jawline,” a man says to the woman holding his hand. “And I like the way she painted his hair. Every curl is so careful.”

“It’s really beautiful,” she says, pointing to one of the portraits. Max has painted him smiling, gazing upwards, and he isn’t even sure if he’s capable of looking that way. “I think this one might be my favorite overall.” When they step aside, he can read the small placard on the wall naming the paintings. It reads, “And if I asked you to name all the things you love, how long would it take for you to name yourself?” Series. Oil on canvas. 2020.

Reid swallows hard, past the lump of emotions lodged in his throat, and turns quickly to walk to another corner of the gallery, both to avoid recognition and because if he keeps looking he thinks he might cry. But when he turns, she’s standing right there. Looking up at him through her long lashes, her graceful hands clasped in front of her as she waits in that lovely lace dress.

“Do you like it?” she asks him, nodding at the corner.

“I don’t understand,” he says. “Why did you paint me?”

Max smiles. “I told you, Magic Man, I wanted to paint pretty things.”

He shakes his head. “But I’m not – I mean, look at me, I’m–”

“I am looking.” She reaches up to brush her fingers against his cheek, having to stand on her toes even in heels to do so. “And you are beautiful. My beautiful. I wanted to show you the way I see you. Because of all the beautiful things, none of them make me feel quite like you do.”

Max takes his hand and walks up to the paintings. She says nothing, just waits as he looks at them close up, unafraid of someone realizing he’s looking at himself. He stares at the light and shadows created by her paintbrush. The bright colors that draw attention over painted skin. The soft gaze, the eyes that seem to look so alive. Stray freckles, flecks of tan and gold. It feels so astonishingly intimate. There’s no denying that her work is remarkable. It is beautiful.

And this is how she sees him. Worthy of that sort of attention. Capable of bringing those kinds of colors to life. And when he faces her, he realizes – the painting with the smile. He does look that way. He can feel the movement of the muscles in his face forming a near mirror image as he realizes he only ever looks that way at her.

“Thank you,” he says. Max pulls him down to kiss him, her lips so sweet, and it feels beautiful. He thinks that if they were not here, surrounded by other people, that he would love nothing more than to avail her of that beautiful dress and paint patterns of her skin with his fingertips, give every inch of her the same level of attention with his lips that she did with her paints, and whisper over and over to her just how lovely he finds her.

But they’re not alone, not yet. “Well I’ll be damned,” Morgan says. All of his friends are there, having discovered this nook of the gallery. “Look at that! She somehow managed to make you look even prettier than usual, Pretty Boy.” Reid flushes crimson as they praise Max’s work. She joins them to walk around the rest of the gallery, her hand in his, and from time to time he swears he can see someone staring at the two of them, and he knows they recognize his face. But he doesn’t care. He doesn’t care how the rest of the world looks at him, so long as he knows the way he looks through her eyes. For the first time, he can see himself the way she sees him. As he is, not as he fears he is.

Somehow, this has become his life. Walking through a gallery of paintings made by his favorite person, while she gazes at him like he’s her only muse, telling him that he belongs among lovely things. Somehow believing it all. Somehow at home surrounded by strangers and a few of the people he trusts most. This is his life. And what a beautiful life it is.

#spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid x max #spencer reid x max brenner #max brenner #criminal minds fanfiction #spencer reid #criminal minds #fanfiction #imagine #little beautiful #brywrites

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skycollides · 3 years

Note

If you write for Tiggy (if not then EZ!) one where he’s being kinda pissy and rude to reader his gf and she doesn’t say anything about it, but the others confront him? Then he like does her nails or something for her lol tyyy

Painting Nails and Spilling Beans

Ez x Reader

Authors note: I apologize in advance for grammar mistakes

English isn’t my native language.

Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist.

Warning: swearing , heartbreak, happy end

Words: 1.983

You’ve been worried about your boyfriend Ez for a week now. He’s acting n to his usual self. Not having a proper conversation only short answers and when you ask him what’s wrong- the answer is aways nothing and you can’t stand it. He usually tells you when somethings bothering and you find a solution for the problem together but not this time. On top of that he hasn’t been at home for 2 days now and you’re getting worried since he isn’t answering any of your calls. So you decide to text Angel hoping he can tell you about his whereabouts.

Hey Angel,

do you know where your

brother is. I can’t get a

hold of him?

Hey Y/n,

yes I do. We’re all

here at the clubhouse.

Come over and join the

party. I have missed

having you around.

Great so he can party with the guys but not return your calls. Is the first thing that comes to your mind after reading Angels answer. You get dressed and do your make up before heading to the scrap yard. Once you arrive you already hear the music blasting and see people outside of the clubhouse. It looks like the party started hours ago. A voice pulls you out of your thoughts.

’’Hey sweetheart’’ you hear Bishops voice.

’’Hey Bish’’ you say and give him a hug.

’’It’s good to see you. It’s been awhile’’

’’That’s true. Have you seen Ez somewhere?’’

’’Yes they’re inside. Go on we can catch up later.’’he smiles.

’’Thank you Obispo. Yes definitely.’’ you say and return his smile.

You head inside the clubhouse and hear Angels laugh. You look in the direction where it’s coming from and see Ez there with him so is Coco.

You make your way over and Angel is the first one to notice you.

’’Hey stranger! I’m happy you made it’’

’’Hey guys good to see you. Erm Ez can I talk to you?’’ you ask him and he completely ignores you continuing talking to Coco. Your face drops and Angel has a confused look on his face. He looks at you and you shake your head not wanting to spill your and Ez’s problems there.

’’Ez I gotta talk to you!’’ you say louder and grab his arm. He shakes your hand off his arm and looks at you before he starts to speak.

’’Can’t you take a hint. What do you think why I haven’t been home? I don’t wanna talk to you. Hop off my dick for goodness sake and leave me alone. Go and annoy someone else.’’ he says rudely before he gets up to get a new beer. You stand there not understanding what’s going on. He never raised his voice at you or been so rude to you before. Tears are streaming down your face and Angel tries to hug you but you move backwards. You turn around and leave the clubhouse in a hurry. You practically run to your car trying to get away from there a fast as you can.

As soon as you get home you go straight to your bedroom locking the door behind you before you let yourself fall onto your bed and cry yourself to sleep.

After you left: Clubhouse

’’What the fuck was that?’’ Coco asks confused.

’’I have no fucking idea. All I know is that she is the sweetest girl I’ve ever met and she doesn’t deserve to be treated like this.’’ Angel says not understanding what is going on with his brother. Seeing you in tears breaks his heart. He has seen you as the little sister he never had ever since Ez brought you to the family dinner about a year ago.

Bishop enters the clubhouse and make his way to Angel and Coco.

’’Is there a reason why Y/n left in a hurry crying?’’ he asks with an eyebrow rising

’’My brother is an asshole I thinks that pretty much sums up what happened.’’ Angel says.

Ez comes back and the 3 men stare at him.

’’What?’’he asks.

’’What? This all you gotta say? What the hell is wrong with you?’’ Coco says.

’’Nothing and I would appreciate it if you all would stop ask me this all the time’’ he says and storms out of the clubhouse. The three of them stare at each other not used to Ez acting like this.

’’I’ll talk to him’’ Angel says and leaves the clubhouse. He sees the lights on in Ez’s trailer so he walks there opens the door and slams it shut behind him.

’’I talk you listen Ezekiel. I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with you but you need to stop lashing out on everyone like this. There is something wrong we ll can see it. You can say there is nothing wrong as often as you want but none of us believes you. It is not our fault that you feel like this and especially not Y/n’s. She is worried about you because she loves you and you act this way? Dud be happy you have a woman like her in your life. She doesn’t deserve to be treated like this. I won’t have it. She’s like the little sister I never had and I hate so see her like his all sad and shit Ez get it together!’’ Ez looks up to his older brother and Angel sees the change in his eyes. Tears are starting to form.

’’I fucked up didn’t I?’’ he asks his brother quietly.

’’Yes you did but we can fix this. You stay here and tomorrow morning you go home and talk with Y/n tell her finally what’s bothering you if you’re not comfortable talking to me about it. But more importantly apologize to her.’’ Angel says and pats his shoulder before leaving Ez alone in his trailer.

Next Day - Your Pov.

You wake up with a bad headache from all the crying before. You take fresh clothes and make your way towards the bathroom hoping the painkillers are still there. You reach the bathroom and open the door and there he is. Ez is standing in the middle of the bathroom looking at you with wide eyes. You drop your clothes wanting to leave Ez stops you and pulls you in his arms.

’’I’m sorry mi reina. You don’t deserve the shit I put you through the past week and especially not what I did last night. I feel ashamed for how I talked to you last night. All I can do is apologize and promise you it won’t happen again baby. I love you so much.’’ he end his speech with kissing your head. You look up to him and see tears in his eyes. You give him a short kiss on the lips and say:

’’Be happy I love Ezekiel.’’ you say and he lets go of you.

’’Wanna hop in?’’ he says nodding towards the bathtub and now you realize your surroundings.

The tub is filled with water and there are candles standing there along with a cup of your favorite tea. You nod and get undressed before you sit down and lean back with your eyes closed.

’’Mind if I join you?’’ he asks but you turn him down.

’’What makes you think I want you in here with me after last night’’ you and his smile fades.

’’I was suffering last night now it’s your time to suffer Ezekiel. Go and get chair.’’ and Ez dies as he’s told hoping it will help him to get out if the dog house.

Once he returns you open your eyes and look at him.

’’Can you hand me a painkiller? My head is killing me’’ you say and once again he’s does as he’s told.

’’Now Ez over there’’ you say and point your finger to the box where you keep all your nail polish.

’’open the box get the purple one and please start doing my nails’’ you say and look into his eyes. He nods and gets the purple nail polish before sitting down. He takes your hand and give you a massage. After he is done he kisses the back of your hand and starts to paint your nails. When he is done you look at your hand and you’re quit happy with the result.

’’Wow I’m impressed Ez. More hidden talents I should know of baby?’’ you say with a smile.

’’Well you’ve got a lifetime to find out Y/n’’ he says and you nod.

’’Sounds good’’ you say before turning in the tub sitting now on the other side so he can start with your other hand. After he finished the second hand he put the polish back to where it belongs and takes the chair back to the kitchen. He shortly returns to you and you’re already out of the tub wrapped up in your fluffy towel. You open your arms for Ez and he glad excepts your hug.

’’Thank you! I really needed this’’ you say and kiss his lips. He returns the kiss taking your head in his hands pulling you closer. You move back and sit down on the floor. He looks down at you and you ask him to sit next to you. Ez sits down and you start to speak.

’’Will you tell me what’s going on now?’’ you ask and he nods.

’’You read about the guy in the newspaper the one who killed himself?’’ he says and you nod.

’’It wasn’t suicide. I made hit look like it. He became a threat to the Galindos and Emily asked me to do something about it. I wasn’t supposed to kill him. It was an accident you have to believe me.’’ he practically begs. You can’t believe what you’re hearing. You’re more shocked about the fact that he is still talking to his Ex than the fact that he killed someone.

’’I don’t know what to say Ez.’’ you say shaking your head before getting off the floor, taking your clothes and leaving the bathroom. You head to the bedroom and close the door behind you. Once you’re dressed you pull out a pack of cigarettes and head out to the back yard. You sit down and light one up. You usually don’t smoke only when you’re completely stressed out which is now the case. Your thought are running wild. Is he cheating on you? How long has he been talking to his Ex behind your back? Do the others know? A bunch of questions are that stress you out even more. You hear the door open and Ez makes his way towards you. He sits down you ask him the questions that have been haunting you for the past 15 minutes.

’’Are you cheating on me? with Emily?’’ you ask anxiously.

’’No mi reina I would never do you hear me never I swear.’’ he says.

’’Does anyone know what you did?’’

’’Only Emily. I didn’t tell her but it was clear to her that it wasn’t suicide. The only other person who knows is you baby. I trust no one like I trust you. You’re the only one I completely open up to. I’m sorry. I didn’t want to bother you with this shit. So I thought pushing you away I wouldn’t feel the urge to tell you. I love you Y/n!’’

’’Do me a favor and stay away from her Ezekiel. She is up to no good. And please don’t push me away like this ever again. I love you Ez more than you know.’’ you say and lean your head on his shoulder. The both of you sit there in silence simply enjoying each others company. You’re happy Ez finally told you what’s bothering him now the both of you can move on from what’s happened.

Taglist:

@everyhowlmarksthedead

@mayans-sauce

@justatiredfool

@lovebennycolonmiguelgalindo

@queenbeered

@ocetevasgirl

@spookys-girl

@charcoocheurie

@nadinesabre

@starrynite7114

@angelreyesgirl

#mayans mc #mayans imagine #ez x reader #ez reyes x reader #ez reyes #jd pardo

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ssa-daddyhotchner · 3 years

Text

Undercover - Chapter 12

Chapter Selection

JJ walked into my room to check in and when she saw that I wasn't there she walked over to Morgan, "Do you know where y/n is, she's not in her room." Morgan put his drink down and started to look around knocking on the bathroom door.

"Y/n you in there", when he didn't hear a response he slowly started to open the door, he found an empty room. Emily went to Morgan we found her. He followed her and they went to Aarons room.

I had moved off the bed and onto the couch laying down. The team walked in and saw me, they let out a sigh. Aaron was sleeping but I was awake. JJ walked up to me, "Here." She handed me my discharge papers and Aarons. I grabbed his hand and shook his a little, "Hotch."

He woke up and I handed him the papers and a pen. We signed the papers and handed them back to JJ. "We're going home ok", he nodded and started grabbing his stuff. I went to my room and gathered everything. Aaron and I getting into the back seat of the SUV heading to the strip.

Everyone got to the jet and I sat next to the window. Aaron sat next to me, he laid his jacket on his lap. He grabbed my hand and held it tightly under the jacket so no one could see. I never looked at him but I interlaced our fingers; I kept staring out the window.

The team decided they were gonna give us some space so we could process everything. As the jet took off I saw the ground getting farther away and the city got smaller till it was just a spec. Without thinking I laid my head on Aarons shoulder he put his head on mine and we both went to sleep.

The team was looking out way they saw that I was on Aaron and he was on me. "What's up with them", Morgan said pointing at us. Everyone turned and started, "Are they together." Emily said.

Rossi was covering of us, "I mean they were together the whole time they were abducted, they're just friends." That seemed to get everyone off of us but they were still suspicious. Halfway though the flight with only hour left Aaron and I woke up.

We switched spots, he’s sitting by the window; I sat across his lap, my legs over his. I nestled my head in his chest, with his arms wrapped around me. When we landed everyone woke up and saw us cuddling. Emily took a few pictures then decided to wake us up; I fluttered my eyes open taking him Aarons smell I sighed.

JJ coughed and I looked up, "Comfortable." I looked down and patted Aaron on his chest getting up and they handed me my stuff.

When I was walking to the cars JJ walked up behind me, "You mind telling me what that was."

I shrugged my shoulders, "What was what?"

"Don't act dumb we all saw what you and Hotch were doing." I got into the back seat. "Yeah we were sleeping. Look while we were undercover we bonded. When we were kidnapped we became friends, Trust me that's all we are." She nodded and that's when Aaron got into the backseat with me. JJ started driving us home.

Aaron got dropped off first then me. When I walked into my apartment Aaron started calling me, I picked up. "Are you gonna come over."

"Yeah I just need to grab a few things and I'll be over." I hung up and got some clothes, went downstairs and got a cab. I got to his place and I knocked. I waited and then he opened the door. "Let me grab these", Aaron grabbed my bag and put it on the bed. I followed him into the bathroom and got undressed.

I let out a whimper and Aaron helped me with my shirt. I froze and stared at my back, "Y/n oh my god." Chris had traced over the scars and that was the first time Aaron got a good look at them. I had a large bruise on my ribs from when I was dragged and fell.

Aaron took off his clothes and I looked at his legs. From top the bottom there were dark red, bruised, and black lines running down to his feet. They weren't to deep the scars would probably fade in a few years but mine were layered they weren't going anywhere.

As were taking a shower washing, he ran his hand down my back. I was very aware of where his hands were and it made me flinch. "Are you okay, did I hurt you."

"No its just I feel the old wounds re-opening.. emotionally with my ex and as you know that's were he cut me too so...just do It genially and slowly okay." He nodded slowly running the body wash down my back.

I stepped out the shower drying off and putting on one of Aarons shirt; I climbed into bed. He followed after me only having boxers on. "Do we have work tomorrow", I whispered

"Yea but I'm think we take some personal days." I agreed, "We could spend some time with Jack."

"I just got to get him back from Hayley." I turned over and faced him, "You think they know about us." Aaron shook his head, "All they have is us together on the plane and you in my hospital room. They might suspect but they don't know anything."

"I only asked just JJ was trying to get some information out of me but... you're right they don't know."

I let out a breath and my head sunk into the pillow nd his hand resting on my waist. "I know you said you didn't wanna talk about it but... If we are going to be with Jack tomorrow don't you think he should know that his uncle passed away."

He stiffened, "I will tell him but he passed, what is It a week ago two.. I don't even know anymore. I need to take to someone about the funeral." Aaron pinched the bridge of his nose. "That's something I wanna worry about tomorrow after I'm well rested; can we just go to bed please?"

I nodded and turned off the light and laid back down. There was a knock at the door, we both got up and answered it to see Rossi. He handed Aaron one of his suitcases. "Figured you wouldn't be in tomorrow so I just brought it now."

"Thanks Dave", I was standing behind Aaron. Dave looked at the both of us, "Goodnight guys." He walked away to his car chuckling. Aaron shit the door and we started laughing.

I tugged on his arm and we went back to sleep actually going to sleep this time.

_____________________

I woke up feeling Aarons breath on the back of my neck. I stretched out and felt kissing on my shoulder blade, "Have you talked to Hayley about Jack." I yawned out.

"Yeah she said she'd drop him off around 10." I looked at the time, there was an hour before he would be here. Getting up and going to the bathroom trying to drag Aaron with me.

"Come on come with me." I groaned as Aaron was refusing to leave the warm bed. "Fine", I walked into the bathroom; getting into the shower feeling the heating water on my skin. I heard the door open and close, "You decided to get off your ass and come with me?"

I chuckled and he cracked a smile still being groggy, "The bed didn't feel the same without you." He said kissing up my neck and jaw. He slowly pecked my cheek and pecked my lips. Pressing our bodies together, I raised my hand to his hair slightly pulling. He lightly groan into my mouth, his hand ran from my hips to my waist. He was trying to avoid the slices on my back.

Pulling away from the kiss we stared at each other for what seemed like hours. He brought my hand to his mouth kissing my hand, "I love you."

"I love you", I turned his around washing his back. I was careful when I got to his legs trying to not go over his stitches roughly. He washed me after him and we turned off the shower. We were both awake Aaron having the energy to put on clothes. I went into the closet and grabbed his brown quarter zip.

"You can keep that if you want", I looked at him. "At least now I got your permission I was just gonna steal it and hope you never noticed", he chuckled walking over to and gave me a tight hug.

When we finished getting ready it was 9:30. Going into the kitchen and making breakfast. There was knock on the door, "Y/n you get it, she's gonna have to know eventually."

"And what if she kills me." He didn't look very amused but still chuckled, "Ha ha okay get the door."

Opening the door I was met with Jack walking to me hugging me legs. '"Hey buddy com one go inside to your dad", Hayley's brows were furrowed and her lips were curved downwards. "Who are you exactly", right as I was about to answer I was cut off by Aaron walking up behind me.

"She's my girlfriend", he put his arm around me pulling me close. Hayley scoffed, "So you have another whore to fuck is that right." I raised my eyebrows at her about to lay into her when Aaron slammed the door in her face.

I looked through the window and saw the speechless look on her face, "Stupid bitch." I walked back over to Aaron and Jack. "Dad what are we doing today?"

"Well me and y/n had a day yesterday so I'm thinking popcorn and some movies. Maybe depending on the direction the day go we can get some ice cream." Jack jumped up and ran to the couch putting on Disney plus. I selected a movie Jack had never seen before and put it on.

As Jack was watching Toy Story 4. "Oh Aaron I need cereal so were gonna need to go to the store."

"We can go after he's done", we both turned around attention to Jack who was almost knocked out on the couch. I turned the movie off early and carried his sleepy ass into the car. After I placed Jack into the car seat in the back I got in the passenger seat. As we were driving he woke up.

"Where are we going?", he was still drowsy. "Were going to the store bud", He hummed and stared out the window. We were in the store Aaron got a phone call, "How's your whore." He let out a sigh and I glanced at him.

I mouthed, 'who is that'. He turned the phone around and I saw Hayley's name. "Her name is y/n she's not a whore and she's fine, thank you for asking." Hayley dragged on the conversation asking questions about me.

After 10min the phone call ended and 10mins later I got a call from my neighbor. "Hello"

"Sorry to bother you y/n but there some woman smashing your care with a bat." I hit Aaron on the shoulder and he looks at me. I rush to check out and pay for my stuff running to the car and waiting for Aaron. When he opens the car I climb in, "We need to go."

"What is it?", I pulled up security footage that showed Hayley at my apartment. He watched as she was smashing my windows and denting the hood. He sped over to my house and we were there under 5min. Jack was still in the car and was watching his mom go destroy my car.

Aaron and I got out the car slamming the door, "What the fuck are you doing." I yelled at Hayley. Aaron ran over to her; grabbed the bat and pinned against the door of my car. "You're going to fucking answer her..."

Hayley had a grin on her face as she looked between Aaron and I. "Why are you with that stupid bitch", she spit at my feet. "You know you don't love her... she's just a quick fuck for you. You should be thanking me Aaron."

The words she spoke made my skin burn up. I wanted to punch the hell out of her. Aaron still held her both of us ignoring her. I called the police, they arriving shortly.

The cops got out their car, "What's the problem her ma'am." The cop walked up to me while his partner approached Hayley and Aaron. "I was at the store when I saw on my security camera this women destroying my car." The officer took Hayley cuffed her and put her in the back of the car.

Aaron came up to me and put his hand on my lower back; he saw me shaking and could hear the fear in my voice. That bitch really did go over the edge after finding out Aaron wouldn't go back to her. The fact that she decided to take action meant she was unhinged and could do physical harm to me.

"We need to go back to the station and you can file a report." I nodded and got back into the car with Jack and followed the police car. When we got to the station I pressed charges and files a restraining order.

Aaron got Jack for next few weeks as Hayley was deemed unfit for the time being. We went home after we situated everything. We decided against telling Jack what was going on and told him Hayley was going away for a while.

It was 9pm when we got home and I put Jack to bed. "Goodnight y/n", he closed his eyes and rolled over on his side. "Night buddy", I leaned down and kissed his temple. When I walked out his room Aaron was leaning against the wall in the hallway.

I stepped in front of him and wrapped my arms around his neck. His hands went my hips and he pecked my lips; I let out a sigh. "What are we gonna do about Hayley?"

"Right now nothing but I promise you we will deal with her okay", he kissed my forehead; grabbed my hand and we went to bad.

My thoughts were on Hayley the whole night, I couldn't go to sleep knowing she wouldn't drop it. Aaron slept soundly... while I tried to get my mind off of her. She'll probably try and kill me. Aarons ex's left because of Hayley but I'm not going anywhere. She's not gonna scare me off.

_________________________

@oreogutz @donttellanyoneireadfanfiction @appleblossoms-posts @marie1115 @mac99martin

#aaron hotch hotchner #aaron hotchner #reader x aaron+hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron #hotch x y/n #hotchner x reader #hotch smut #hotchner smut #smut #aaron hotch fanfiction #fanfiction #fanfic #criminal minds #writing

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jaspers-levis · 4 years

Text

Continuation Two: Dusk

TW: Self-image, allusion to eating disorders, abuse mention

PSA: The point of this story is not that the reader has value as a woman because of Paul’s attention. Everyone has value. Period. Size, shape, orientation, identification, race, religion, etc are all things that make us who we are but do not define our value as a human being. You don’t need a significant other to believe you have value before you suddenly have value. The point is, sometimes we as humans struggle to see the truth already in front of our own eyes. Our loved ones are there to remind us that no matter what the voices in your head say, you are perfect just the way you are.

Continuation Two: Dusk

Paul Lahote x female reader

“Ugh!” you grunted, your hand slipping from your waistband as you tried desperately to shimmy into a too-tight pair of shorts from last summer. The jean material would barely fit over your hips, shockingly snug despite the fact you were sure you hadn’t gained that much weight over the last year. You tugged one last time, only to hear the material rip. “Damn it!” Sighing, you slid the shorts down your legs and pulled them free, falling back onto the bed in defeat. It hadn’t been that long since you’d been able to fit into those shorts easily, and the size was already on the larger side in your mind. How could you possibly have gained so much weight in such a short time?

Nothing would fit you beside your largest pair of athletic shorts and even those were snug; you took a deep breath to hold back tears and failed. For years your ex had ridiculed you over your size until you obsessed over every calorie, every crumb on your plate. You’d prided yourself on dropping sizes every few months, until you’d gotten to your ‘goal size’. It was an incredibly unhealthy point in your life, both mentally and physically, but if it was possible for you to make your ex happy in some small way it meant one less way he could hurt you. Now it was a hard to break habit to value your appearance by the number on the tag, a habit you’d thought you’d dropped until now. Hot tears slipped down your cheeks and dripped into your hair, sticking it to your face.

Your phone buzzed beside your head, despairingly you smacked the covers until you found it.

hey babe, be home in a few. dont forget the bonfire 2nite!

You groaned, smacking your forehead lightly. The first bonfire of the summer with the entire pack celebrating the official start to the season was this evening; the weather was supposed to be warmer than it had been in the last few months so you’d pulled out your summer wardrobe in the hopes that everything still fit. This was the last pair of shorts you tried on and everything else was similarly too small… your heart sunk. You wanted to wear something cute to the bonfire, but nothing seemed to fit.

It normally wouldn’t be such a big deal, but Emily and Kim were both small and athletic and always wore clothes that highlighted their form. Quil’s new imprint Hannah was tall and slim, with a river of striking black hair and a fondness for crop tops and short shorts that showed off her endless legs. It felt like every other female you knew was fit and perfect--besides you. You knew it wasn’t a good idea to compare yourself to others but it was hard when you were constantly surrounded by supernaturally attractive men and their similarly attractive significant others. Why couldn’t you be slim and perfect too? You felt like a chubby little frog next to them…

“Babe, I’m home!” Paul called from the kitchen, the front screen door slapping shut behind him. Hastily you sat up and swiped at the embarrassing tears dripping down your cheeks but it was too late. “Honey, what’s wrong?” Paul was at your side in an instant, his warm hand sweeping your hair over your shoulder and resting against your neck.

“Nothing, it’s fine,” you muttered, turning your face away. “My dumb shorts don’t fit.”

“Oh,” you heard the frown in his voice and he picked up the offending garment from the floor. “These ones? Well baby, these are tiny! No wonder they don’t fit, they’re practically a children’s size.”

“But I used to fit in them just last summer!” you cried, turning to him and grabbing the shorts. “How did I get so fat??” You thrust yourself up from the bed and went to stand in front of the full length mirror. “I used to be so tiny, I never had a problem fitting into anything. Now I’m just a chunky little gremlin…”

“I’m sorry, what?” Paul asked incredulously, coming up behind you and yanking the shorts from your hands and chucking them forcefully into the corner of the bedroom. He slid his hands under your shirt and wrapped them around your waist. “Honey, no. For one, you’re tiny still, especially compared to me,” he chuckled and gently kissed your neck. “And secondly, who the fuck cares? We’ll buy new shorts.”

“It’s not that, I should be able to fit into them still! How could I have let myself gain so much weight?!” you sniffed again, glaring at your shape in the mirror and seeing every slice of pizza, every spoonful of ice cream, every piece of bread…

“Seriously? You’re not overweight!” he retorted, his dark eyebrows pushing together.

“Compared to Kim, and Hannah, and, and, and everyone else I am!” you sobbed, trying to pull away from him to hide your shame.

Angrily he spun you around and cupped your cheeks to look into your eyes. His hands trembled slightly, the only betrayal of his weakened control. “Y/N. You are NOT overweight. You are HEALTHY. You’ve gained weight because when I met you, all you had in your fridge was a bag of salad and a carton of eggs. Do you know how happy I am to see you fill out? Do you know how much it made me nervous that you would forget to eat for a day? I look at you and I see someone who is happy and healthy now. Every inch of you is perfect.”

Startled at the raw emotion in his voice, you hiccuped. Paul’s eyes were serious and dark in above his russet cheekbones, but not without love. Tenderly he wiped away tears with his thumbs. “I love you for better or for worse, no matter what you look like, no matter how much you weigh or what size you are, no matter what you do with your hair or if you wear makeup or not, or if you wear nice clothes or sweats,” he whispered, pressing his lips to yours in the barest imitation of a kiss. He pulled away and smirked suddenly. “But luckily, you’re exactly my type, and I think you’re hot as fuck.”

You giggled at that, leaning into his touch. “So you don’t think I’m fat?”

Paul rolled his eyes and pressed his face into your neck, nipping delicately at the sensitive skin there. “No, you’re delectable,” he growled, pulling the two of you back onto the bed with you on top and slipping his hands under the ragged t shirt you wore to caress your back. “And tempting,” he kissed your collarbone. “And perfect,” he pressed his lips to the hollow of your throat. Planting hot kisses across your skin, he began to lift your shirt, his eagerness abruptly making itself known against your stomach.

“Thank you,” you whispered shyly, ducking your head against his shoulder.

He growled softly and paused in his attempts to undress you. “For what?”

“For helping me remember my value, even when I struggle with it. I… haven’t always been good at remembering that my size shouldn’t matter.”

“I know, sweetheart,” he smoothed the hair over the back of your head.

“What do you mean, ‘you know’?” you leaned back and frowned.

“Honey, I’ve seen photos of you from the time that you were with your ex, and you’ve mentioned he’d abused you. It’s not hard to make the leap,” he pushed himself up on his elbows and swallowed a shudder. “I swear to everything that is holy, if I see that fuckwad ever again I will rip his fucking teeth out one by one and make him eat them like candy.”

“Okay, well we’re not going to let that happen, for legal reasons,” you laughed and smacked his chest.

“Mm, well, you better hope he doesn’t show up again because I can’t make any promises,” Paul shrugged unremorsefully, but calmed enough to stroke his fingers down your bare thighs straddling his waist. “All I can do for now is make sure you know how loved you are, how smart and funny and strong you are, and remind you that I love every piece and part of you just the way you are.”

Your heart squeezed in your chest, suddenly overfull of adoration for this fierce, wise cracking, temper-losing, enormous giant of a man who had a tenderness to him that belied everything his friends and family knew about him. Looking down at him, all you saw was the love in his eyes, the truth in everything he said. Paul had fought hard and earned every bit of the trust you placed in him, trust you had always had difficulty in placing in another person. While you believed in the imprinting mechanics having seen it first hand, it had taken you months to trust Paul in spite of your supernatural bond. Now, for the first time, you felt yourself truly letting your guard down, having shared your last and most shameful weakness. And he loved you, despite that. “I love you so much,” you smiled shyly and bent to kiss him lightly.

“I love you more, honey,” he returned your smile before deepening the kiss into something smoldering and languorous. Paul kissed you like it was the first time, the last time, and every other time in between, worshipping every inch of your skin with his lips and hands until you were burning up with desire. No matter that you didn't have anything to wear to the bonfire, it was likely you wouldn’t make it there before dusk anyways...

#paul lahote #paul lahote imagine #twilight fan fiction #twilight #twilight fanfiction #Twilight wolf pack #werewolves #twilight wolf #twilight wolves

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bechloe-are-acadorable · 4 years

Text

Bathroom door

Beca bounded down the stairs, arms full of her things she was packing up to leave the Bella house. She crashed into someone and her stuff went flying everywhere. She glanced up to see Aubrey’s slightly smirking face “What the hell are you doing standing at the bottom of the stairs like that?” She yelled at the older girl “In fact what are you even doing here? You don’t live here anymore!

Aubrey pulled a face "In a few hours neither do you!" She retorted. "Yeah well I still live here now and you don't so why don't you just do us all a favour and get lost! We're all trying to pack away and don't need you around making everything ten times harder!" Beca ducked down to retrieve some of the things that she'd dropped.

Aubrey scowled "So much for Bellas for life" she muttered and stormed up the stairs. Beca sighed and collected the rest of her things before deciding to make amends with Aubrey. After all Beca wasn't even annoyed at Aubrey, she was snappy simply because she didn't want to move out. She didn't want to leave all of the Bellas behind. She didn't want to leave one Bella in particular behind anyway.

Sighing again Beca trudged up the stairs to Chloe's room (the room that had once belonged to both Chloe and Aubrey) and opened the door ready to apologise to her. She frowned when she saw that Aubrey wasn't here until she heard someone in the ensuite bathroom.

Beca sat on the foot of the bed next to the bathroom door. Apologising wasn't something Beca found easy nor did often so not having to actually do it face to face with Aubrey relieved her slightly.

"Look Bree" she began before taking a deep breath "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to kick off on you and you know this house will always be yours as much as it is ours I just... have other things on my mind." Beca paused waiting for Aubrey to reply but when she didn't she figured she must still be pissed off with her.

"I just... I don't want to leave. I don't want to move away yet and be without the Bellas, you guys truly have become my family and I guess I'm just scared of losing that. I've made friendships in here that are so much stronger than anything I've ever had before. Like Amy she's a pain in the ass but she's such a laugh and a great mate to have and Chloe..." Beca sighed upon saying the redheads name.

"Well anyone with a working pair of eyes can tell Chloe and I have such a strong bond. I've never felt anything like it before and I don't want to lose that. She's the best and if I'm being honest that's 90% of the reason I'm dreading leaving so much, I don't want to leave Chloe. She makes everything okay and safe and exciting and I know now that she's going to move away and get a job and a boyfriend and a new life and forget about me totally. I just... I don't want that to happen"

Beca looked down, trying hard to stop the tears in her eyes from rolling down her cheeks "I'm in love with her" she managed to squeak out before the first tear rolled down her cheek. God she was being stupid! Why on God's earth would she tell Aubrey something like that. "Bree please don't tell her any of that"

Beca sniffed before she got up and headed towards the door.

Beca turned the door handle and jumped upon seeing Aubrey walking up the stairs towards her. Becas eyes widened as she turned around to see Chloe at the now open bathroom door. In that moment Becas brain short circuited and she stood there dumbly looking at Chloe, mouth slightly agape.

Chloe looked at Beca with a soft smile "I think we need to talk" she said in barely over a whisper. Beca closed the door behind her and quickly wiped her eyes before taking a deep breath and nodding slightly. "Well come over then I don't bite" Chloe giggled softly as she sat on her bed.

Beca shuffled towards Chloe and sat on the opposite end of the bed, rolling her eyes playfully Chloe scooted towards Beca. "Um, how much of that did you hear?" Beca muttered looking at her hands in her lap. "All of it" Chloe admitted truthfully. Beca nodded slightly "I'm sorry" Beca mumbled.

Chloe frowned at this "You have nothing to be sorry for Beca" Chloe replied softly, gently placing a hand on Becas leg. "I do. I've damaged the whole dynamic of our friendship" Beca groaned out in frustration. "It'll be okay" Chloe tried to soothe her but Beca shook her head "You'll always look at me differently now" Beca sighed. "Look I'm sorry Chloe but I have to go" Beca stood up to leave. "We can work through this Beca" Chloe tried but Beca shook her head as she exited the room.

______________________________

It had been 3 months since Beca had confessed her feelings to Chloe and three months since Chloe and Beca had last spoken. Chloe had tried, really she had but Beca wouldn't answer the phone to her or reply to her barrage of texts. Beca had completely isolated herself from all of the Bellas and moved to New York, working at a record label and living in a tiny crummy apartment.

Beca was well and truly hating her life. Living without the Bellas was hard but living without Chloe was almost unbearable. Her heart ached and she was lucky if she smiled once a week. She hadn't made any new friends and was just going through the motions, even mixing music didn't make her feel any better.

Chloe on the other hand was in a much better position. She had moved to Florida and was working as Ariel in Disneyland and loving every minute of it. She had always loved Disneyland and now it seemed her dreams of being a princess in real life had come true. She loved interacting with the children and ensuring that their visit was filled with awe and wonder like her trips had been as a child.

Chloe being Chloe had made loads of friends already and kept in regular contact with the rest of the Bellas. The only thing that would have made her life better would have been having her best friend back in it. She missed Beca dearly and felt a stabbing pain in her chest every time she thought about her scrappy little friend who had once inadvertently confessed her love to her.

She wished that Beca would answer the phone or text her back. She so desperately wanted to make things right between the two of them. Just because she didn't have the same feelings for her didn't mean they couldn't remain best friends. She missed Beca more than she'd ever missed anyone before and had begged and pleaded with the younger girl to talk to her to no avail.

Chloe woke up from a lovely dream, in the dream The Bellas were performing at Disneyland, all dressed as different princesses to an adoring crowd. Chloe and Beca were performing a short duet and Beca grinned at her with that smile she reserved especially for Chloe. The alarm clock jolted her awake and the sleepy smile remained on her lips for a second before remembering that she hadn't seen that smile in 3 whole months.

Chloe sighed and got her phone out to text Beca, knowing that she wouldn't get a reply. For all Chloe knew Beca had changed her phone number but text her anyway 'Hey Becs, you were in my dream last night, The Bellas were performing together at Disneyland! I miss you... please text me back x' Chloe quickly got changed, ready for another day in work.

Chloe got there slightly early as she always did, a smiling Chicago came over in his Prince Charming attire "Good morning Ariel" he laughed "Good morning to you too Prince Charming" Chloe laughed back. The pair had gotten closer over the past weeks and Chicago had started flirting heavily with the redhead.

He dropped to one knee and took Chloes hand in his "Would you do me the honour of accompanying me on a date tonight?" He asked already in character. Chloe giggled at the goofiness of him "Of course my prince" She replied. "Splendid" he stood up "Your chariot will await at 8" he kissed her hand before walking off. The other princesses gathered around her to talk to her about it before their shift started.

As soon as her shift finished, Chloe rushed home to get ready for her date, pausing only to alert the Bellas group chat of her date.

Stacey: You're literally going out with prince charming!

Aubrey: You're living every girls fantasy!

CR: Not EVERY girls fantasy

Fat Amy: Well every straight girls fantasy

Ashley: What are you going to wear?

Chloe pondered this for a second before getting up and looking through her wardrobe and picking out three options and sending pictures of each to the group chat.

Aubrey: Number 2

Jessica: 1

Ashley: 1

CR: Nah deffo 3

Emily: They're all nice!

Stacey: I have to agree with Bree number 2

Fat Amy: I'd say 3

Flo: 1 or 3

Lily: I killed someone in an outfit like 2

Chloe: Okay...

Chloe: You guys were no help

Chloe: What do you think @Beca?

Although Beca was still technically in the chat she hadn't spoken in it for 3 months and as suspected, she didn't break the silence. Chloe sighed and went with number 2 and got ready for her date. She was ready about 15 minutes before he was due to pick her up and decided to text Beca. Even after all of this time it wasn't any easier without her.

Chloe: Hey Bec, I tried calling you again yesterday but you didn't answer. Are you okay? Is this still your number? Please don't hate me forever, text or call me whenever you want and I'll be here x

Chloe heard a knock at the door and smoothed her hair down before answering the door. "Well hello there Chloe, you look amazing" Chloe smiled back at Chicago, "Looking pretty handsome yourself" Chloe replied. The pair set off in Chicago's car to a nearby Italian restaurant. Chicago was a perfect gentleman opening the door for Chloe and such.

The date went well and Chicago was as charming and funny as ever, he even walked Chloe back to her door after driving her home. "I had a great time Chicago" Chloe told him "Me too" Chicago smiled and leant in and kissed Chloe.

Chloe kissed him back briefly before pulling away "Well goodnight, thanks again Chicago" Chloe smiled before letting herself into her house and kicking off her heels. Chloe got undressed for bed and considered the entire date.

She had had a good time, it was fun and the two would make a great couple she mused but couldn't put her finger on why she didn't feel like she thought she would. She just didn't have that spark with him, she didn't feel for him what she'd expected to. What she'd hoped to.

Chloe flopped into bed and considered the problem some more. He was the third guy she'd been on a date with since moving to Florida but she had expected more from him. It was chemistry that she didn't have with him.

For example if she was out with Beca then the conversation would have never ceased. There was always ease between the two girls relationship. She always felt like she could be 100% herself when she hung out with Beca.

Then again that was a friendship, a relationship is something different altogether. If her and Beca had ever been romantically involved maybe she would have felt the same way around her. Almost immediately Chloe dispelled this thought from her head, she knew that she'd always act the same way around Beca no matter what capacity their relationship was.

It was a true conundrum. For some reason Beca was always in her thoughts when dates didn't work out. It was probably because she missed her friend Chloe reasoned. And she did. She missed Beca dearly, it was almost as though her right arm had been chopped off that's how integral Beca was to her life. Chloe sighed before settling into bed for the night.

Chloe woke up to a knock at her door. She got out of bed and opened it to see Chicago dressed in his Prince Charming suit. "What are you doing?" Chloe mumbled "Well I'm your Prince Charming aren't I?" He replied in a voice that wasn't his own. Chloe cocked her head and it took a second or two for her to click onto who's voice it was.

"Beca?" Chloe gasped "Yes m'lady?" Chicago replied still in Becas voice before magically transforming into Beca, still wearing the princely attire. Chloe threw her arms around Beca and hugged her, right before pulling away and looking at Becas grin. She pulled the shorter girl into a searing kiss before abruptly waking up to the sound of her phone ringing.

Chloe sat bolt upright in bed, panting slightly from shock and surprise before shutting off the call from Chicago. Chloe took deep breaths, trying to calm herself down. Why was this happening? Why was she dreaming about kissing Beca? Why didn't it feel wrong?

She picked her phone up and called Aubrey, 3 rings in she answered "Hey Chloe what's up?" Chloe inhaled deeply "I um... nothing" Chloe didn't know what to say, she was probably just being stupid after all. She didn't actually have feelings for Beca. Or did she? "Chloe what's up?" Aubrey asked again.

"Nothing" Chloe repeated, slightly more convincing than the last time "Don't make me ask again" came Aubrey's stern voice from the other side of the line. Chloe sighed "Well... um... have you ever had a dream about kissing someone that you shouldn't have been kissing?" Chloe managed to get out.

"That I shouldn't have been kissing? Like who? Trump? Ew fuck no!" Aubrey chuckled. "No I mean like a friend" Chloe sighed out "Not really no" Aubrey replied truthfully. "Yeah no me neither" Chloe laughed weakly "Well who was it?" Aubrey questioned her. "No one. It doesn't matter" Chloe added hoping she'd drop it.

No such luck. "Well you have to tell me now" Chloe groaned at this "It was Beca wasn't it?" Aubrey asked. "How... how did you know?" Chloe stuttered "You've always been a bit gay for Beca" Aubrey said nonchalantly. "What? No I haven't!" Chloe squeaked out.

Aubrey laughed at this "You definitely have! All that hand holding and cuddling up during movies and not stopping going on about her and how beautiful she is" Aubrey stated. "I... I'm an affectionate person that's all!" Chloe protested. "I was supposedly your best friend and you weren't that touchy feely with me!" Aubrey argued.

Shit. She was right. Everything was always... different with Beca. A stronger bond. A bit more tender. A deeper love. "Oh my god" Chloe breathed out "And the penny drops" Aubrey deadpanned. "I... I think..." Chloe gulped loudly "I think I love her" she managed to get out.

"I know you do" Aubrey said quietly. "Why... why didn't you ever say something to me?" Chloe questioned her "Its the kind of thing you need to figure out for yourself Chlo" Aubrey said softly. "Yeah I suppose you're right, thanks Bree... I have to go now" Chloe whispered out. "Let me know how it goes!" Aubrey called out before Chloe hung up. Chloe quickly text Beca.

Chloe: Becs we need to talk, call or text me please?

No reply, not that Chloe was expecting one really. She had no idea how else to contact Beca. She didn't know where she lived or worked or anything, all she knew was that she was in New York and working with a record company.

Chloe searched for hours and hours online for Beca until eventually she found her name listed on one of the record companies. Well if Beca wasn't going to talk to her then she was going to have to go and see her.

Chloe rang work up and took a few of her holiday days off and quickly packed a bag. She got a taxi to the airport and booked the first available plane to New York.

Not even 6 hours after waking up from that dream and Chloe was aboard a plane ready to fly her to New York. It was scary. Terrifying really. She was going to see Beca for the first time in such a long time and tell her how she felt about her.

One step at a time though, she knew where Beca worked but not where she lived and the working day would probably be over by the time she arrived. Chloe thought long and hard for a while but eventually decided to just turn up to her work and hope she was there.

The plane ride, although relatively short in duration, seemed to drag on for an eternity. Chloe was getting more nervous by the second and by the time the plane landed she was a ball of nerves. Grabbing her bag she hurried through the airport and hailed a cab to Becas work.

She got there at 6:15 and entered the building hoping that Beca hadn't left yet. The reception desk was empty so Chloe scouted round, unsure of what she was even looking for. "Can I help you?" Chloe wheeled round at the words and was greeted to a perplexed looking woman. "Um hi I know someone who works here, Beca Mitchell and I don't know if she's here or if she's gone home yet"

The woman raised an eyebrow at her "Beca will have left over an hour ago, as soon as it's 5 o'clock she's out of the door" the woman chuckled. "Ah yes that does sound like her" Chloe giggled "You see the thing is is that I don't actually know where she lives..." the woman frowned slightly.

"How well do you know her?" She queried. "Oh very well. We're best friends" Chloe said confidently. "You're best friends but you don't know where she lives?" Chloe laughed nervously. "We went to college together, we lived together and we were co-captains of our college acappella group but she moved here and I moved to Florida. I have pictures, do you want to see them?" Chloe got her phone out "No I believe you" the woman laughed.

"It's a surprise you see, she didn't know I was coming" Chloe explained "I see" the woman nodded "Is there any chance you could help me out? Have you been to her apartment?" Chloe asked hopefully. "Me? No. As far as I'm aware no one in this place has" Chloe's face dropped at this "Well is there any way you could find out where she lives for me?"

The woman chewed her bottom lip contemplatively "I dunno, it's against policy I could get into trouble" she muttered. "Please? Pretty please? You'll be doing me a massive favour and no one will ever find out" the woman thought for a couple of seconds, assessing the situation.

She seemed harmless enough and hopefully a visit from a friend would cheer her moody coworker up. "Wait here I'll be two minutes" she said "Oh my god thank you so much I owe you one big time!" Chloe beamed.

She waited anxiously for the woman's return, when she arrived back she handed Chloe a piece of paper with the address written on it. "Honestly I can't thank you enough for this!" Chloe gushed "It's nothing" Chloe engulfed the woman in a quick hug. "Thanks again!" She said before leaving and hailing another cab.

Before long she was stood outside Becas apartment door. She must have been standing there for a good 15 minutes working up the courage to knock on it. She didn't know what to say.

She almost bottled it, she almost turned around and left for the airport to get a flight home. But she couldn't. She couldn't leave when she was this close to seeing Beca again. Chloe took a deep breath before wrapping her knuckles across the door.

She heard a muffled "Finally" through the door before it was opened. There she was. Becas mouth dropped open at the sight of Chloe in front of her after all these months. Chloe smiled awkwardly "Hey Becs" she whispered.

Beca remained mute and unmoving, she couldn't quite comprehend what was happening. Surely this was a dream? Why else would Chloe be stood at her door? Tears welled in Chloe's eyes upon seeing Beca after so long and she could no longer help herself, she hugged the smaller girl tightly.

Beca stood there, almost frozen but engulfed in Chloe’s arms. She breathed in Chloe’s scent that she hadn’t realised she’d missed this much before clearing her throat slightly. Chloe released Beca and took a slight step back “You better come in” Beca managed to get out. Chloe nodded and followed Beca into her apartment.

Chloe looked around the tiny place as she followed Beca to the couch. Beca picked the remote up and turned the TV off before offering Chloe a seat. Chloe sat down but Beca remained on her feet, pacing slightly.

Chloe glanced up at her nervous friend “I missed you” she said sincerely. Beca ran a hand through her hair “I missed you too” she admitted quietly. “Can you sit down so we can talk?” Chloe asked softly, Beca paced a few more times before reluctantly nodding and sitting down next to the redhead.

Beca bounced her leg nervously as she struggled to look at Chloe “Bec can you look at me please?” Chloe almost begged. Becas eyes drifted up to Chloe’s face where Chloe spotted the tears threatening to escape. Chloe exhaled deeply “Why did you shut me out?” Chloe whispered as Beca shook her head.

“You know why” Beca glanced down at the floor again. “No I don’t” Chloe said softly as Beca ran a hand through her hair again. “It was too much. I said too much and I couldn’t take it back” Beca croaked out.

She began to pick at the chipped black nail polish on her fingernails. “Beca I’m so sorry” Chloe began, a stray tear falling from her own eyes “I never wanted you to feel like you had no choice but to cut contact with me. It must have been horrible for you, feeling the way you did. I’m so sorry Becs” Chloe choked out.

Beca glanced back up and her heart broke upon seeing Chloe cry “Please don’t cry Chloe” she pleaded. Chloe dried her eyes and took a deep breath “I just... I missed you so much and I thought I’d lost you forever!” Chloe croaked out.

Beca sniffed “I’m sorry Chloe it’s just... you don’t know what it’s like loving someone who only sees you as a friend. It’s crushing. It almost feels like you can’t breathe any more” Chloe’s heart broke a little bit more knowing she’d caused Beca to feel like this “And I just didn’t know what to do. I thought running away would help but all I do is think about you. I’d rather have you in my life as a friend than not at all Chlo” Beca added quickly.

Chloe steadied her nerves and made sure she locked eyes with Beca before continuing. “Beca I don’t want to just be friends with you anymore. I think I love you” Becas mouth dropped open at this “What?” She squeaked out. “I think I love you Beca” Chloe said plainly. “Like love me or love me love me?” Beca asked quickly Chloe smiled at this. “Love you love you” Beca could hardly believe her own ears. “You do?” Chloe nodded as a small smile appeared on Becas lips, widening until it almost engulfed her whole face.

“So... can... can I kiss you?” Beca asked as Chloe nodded vigorously. Beca pulled Chloe in for a kiss that was half-ruined by Becas inability to stop smiling, Chloe however found it absolutely adorable. “Promise you’ll never leave me again?” Chloe asked as she broke away from the kiss “I promise” Beca replied sincerely before leaning in for another kiss.

#bechloe #pitch perfect #bechloe fanfic #bechloe oneshot #bhloe #bathroom door

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greenapricot · 4 years

Text

2019 fic year in review

Total number of completed stories: 18

Total word count: 53536

Fandoms written in: Lewis (15), Endeavour (2), Inspector Morse (1), Shetland (1), Victoria (1). (Those numbers don’t add up bc there’s a fic that is Lewis, Endeavour, and Inspector Morse all at once.)

Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d expected? More. I challenged myself to post a fic a month for 2019, so I had hoped to write 12 but hadn’t fully expected that I would. I’m very pleased with myself for having met that goal (even if I didn’t technically meet it bc I didn’t post fic in September, but I’m going to call 18 fics a win anyway).

What’s your own favorite story of the year? I’ve answered other fic memes during the year about my favorite and though I’ve written more fics since then I still think my favorite is A Man About to Fly (Lewis, James/Robbie, gen). It’s just got the most perfect atmosphere of delicate longing that feels so right to me in a way I can’t quite describe. I also think it’s the fic of mine that I’ve reread the most this year.

Did you take any writing risks this year? I would call it a risk, more of a stretch or a challenge to myself, but I wrote in two new fandoms, Shetland (No Holiday, Jimmy/Duncan, mature) and Victoria (Delayed Gratification, Palmerstons, mature). I hadn’t planned to write for either fandom but the ideas for those two stories just grabbed me and then I needed them to exist and so had no choice but to write them.

Also, writing Morris Dancers (Lewis, James/Robbie, teen) in @bryndeavour‘s Night Vale AU universe was a fun challenge with the radio format, getting the Night Vale tone right, and making it fit with the fic she’d already written.

Do you have any fanfic or profic goals for the new year? Now that I’ve proven to myself that I can write a lot of things in one year I want to write something long again. I have two casefics I’ve been poking at off and on for a while now. One in my Lewis wingfic universe and one that follows on from my other Lewis post-s9 fics. I think the wingfic one will end up happening first, even though I’ve had the idea for the other one for something like three years, mostly just because I’ve been having a lot of fun brainstorming casefic and wingfic universe ideas with @bryndeavour.

I also have two more parts to my Shetland fic planned and a couple of WIPs I’d like to finish. And, I just started three new prompt fics (one in a fandom I haven’t written in before). I’d like to finish and post them in the next week or so just to prove I can still write short quick things and also hopefully write something for the other prompts I got.

Most popular story of the year? By kudos, Misuse of Police Resources (Lewis, James/Robbie, explicit); by comments, Over the Edge (Lewis, James/Robbie, mature). Though Over the Edge will surpass Misuse in kudos at some point because it’s much more recent and has almost as many kudos.

Story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion: Delayed Gratification (Victoria, Lady Palmerston/Lord Palmerston) and No Holiday (Shetland, Jimmy/Duncan). This is no surprise at all though because Delayed Gratification is an obscure pairing in a not terribly large fandom and Shetland fandom is very tiny. So they have the least kudos but I think they have been properly appreciated in the small spaces in which they exist. I think I would also add Overture (Lewis, James/Robbie/Laura, explicit) to this list, but again, it being explicit threesome fic I’m not super surprised it doesn’t have a ton of comments or kudos bc not everyone is into that.

Most fun story to write: Winter Wonderland (Lewis, James/Robbie, explicit) and Misuse of Police Resources (Lewis, James/Robbie, explicit). Both of these grew from convos in discord chat and I think that’s part of where the fun in writing came from, snickering to my self about how people were likely to react to certain lines and feeling very clever with my use of cliches.

Most unintentionally telling story: Evening the Odds (Lewis, James/Robbie, gen). My husband is older than me (though not as much of an age difference as Robbie and James) and I do have thoughts similar to James’ in this fic from time to time.

Biggest disappointment: Not posting a fic in September. Which I know is ridiculous bc I posted so much fic but I still think about it and am annoyed with myself.

Biggest surprise: That I met and exceeded my fic a month goal and that I wrote in new fandoms. I must say I’m pretty damn proud of myself for having written so much.

I’m not doing the tagging thing bc I’m just not but if you wrote things in 2019 and haven’t done one of these I think you should. :)

Full list of everything I wrote in 2019 in chronological order blow.

More than all the rest of the world - Lewis (TV) (235 words) James/Robbie - teen - Fluff, Established Relationship “I love you,” James says, pressing a kiss to Robbie’s navel.

Takes one to know one - Lewis (TV) (570 words) James/Robbie - general audiences - Established Relationship, Angst with a Happy Ending It was a stupid fight, it’s never anything but a stupid fight; the job getting to them and them taking it out on each other. Or the job getting to James and James taking it out on Robbie.

Now at the end of the day - Endeavour (TV) (389 words) Max/Morse - general audiences - Love Confessions When Morse walks into the morgue, Max is at the worktop under the windows performing his usual tidying up rituals.

His only remaining vice - Lewis (TV) (311 words) James/Robbie - general audiences - Established Relationship It is a Saturday, they don’t have a case and are down at the bottom of the rota; the day is miraculously their own. Yet they have ventured out into the bitter cold all same because James needs coffee and what they’ve got in the flat won’t do.

A Man About To Fly - Lewis (TV) (2524 words) James/Robbie - general audiences - Episode: s07e05-06 Intelligent Design parts 1-2, Angst with a hopeful ending James looks away from Lewis’ smile and takes another sip of his pint, but it’s not Lewis now, it’s Robbie. Robbie’s smile. To say the name aloud, to have Robbie smile at him like that when he does, is a gift. A gift James has received just in time for it to no longer be useful.

Evening the Odds - Lewis (TV) (605 words) James/Robbie - general audiences - Established Relationship, Angst, Discussion of Mortality James is beautiful, a silhouette in the dark, light from the street lamp catching his hair in an almost halo and turning the smoke bright as it drifts above the garden wall; but the beauty of the moment doesn’t outweigh Robbie’s hope that the next time James tries to give up smoking it will stick.

Misuse of Police Resources - Lewis (TV) (4275 words) James/Robbie, Laura Hobson - explicit - Light Bondage, Masturbation He should have gone with rope, then he’d be able to untie himself, but he couldn’t quite maintain the fantasy of Lewis tying him up in intricate knots, except for how he’s always doing it unintentionally. James thumps his head back against the mattress in defeat. He’s not getting out of this on his own, he’s going to have to ring someone, and there are very few someones in his life.

Delayed Gratification - Victoria (TV) (1723 words) Lord Palmerston/Lady Palmerston - mature - Missing Scene, Episode 3x05 A Show of Unity Emily steps back, breaking the kiss, and Henry leans toward her making a low hum of protest. She takes his hand and leads him to her dressing room; their dressing room now that he has returned, as is their tradition. When they are together here in the castle away from parliamentary time pressure, they dress and undress each other.

Enkindled Spring - Lewis (TV) (4170 words) James/Robbie - teen - Established Relationship, Magical Realism, Wingfic, Alternate Universe, Fluff A large bird with a tail similar to a swallow is soaring overhead, James’ gaze hasn’t left it since he finished his sandwich. I wonder if he’s remembering how it feels to soar through the air, the sun warming his back and wings. It’s a sight I’d very much like to see.

Morris Dancers - Dreaming Spires Radio - Lewis (TV) (2872 words) James/Robbie - teen - Nightvale AU, Alternate Universe, Supernatural Elements Trees are in full bloom all across our fair city, filling the streets with the scent of their perfume and the edges of our peripheral vision with those familiar swirling shadows that can’t quite be seen no matter how fast you turn your head. Do not fear the shadows, they mean you no harm. Unless you have personally offended their families. This is Dreaming Spires Radio and I am, as always, your host, James Hathaway.

Overture - Lewis (TV) (5947 words) James/Laura/Robbie - explicit - Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Oral Sex, Anal Sex, Threesome The way they keep looking at him and at each other is enough to make a bloke think things that can’t possibly be true. If pressed Robbie would have to admit that the thought has crossed his mind; him and Laura, him and James, the three of them together, but it’s only ever been a thought, wank fodder, never a real possibility.

Aftermath - Lewis (TV) (1407 words) James/Robbie - teen - Angst with a Happy Ending, Love Confessions Robbie wakes to a steady beeping in a bed that’s not his own. He feels like he’s been hit by a lorry. Wait. He was. Or near enough, if it weren’t for James. James.

A storm that blackens the quiet sea - Lewis (TV) (727 words) James/Robbie - teen - Established Relationship, case-related angst James takes a long drag and leans against the wall, turning his face to the grey winter sky. It will be dark soon, they’ve been in court all day, yet it’s come to nothing. Less than nothing. He can’t keep letting cases get to him like this.

Even the weeds are green and flowering - Lewis (TV), Inspector Morse (TV), Endeavour (TV)) (2057 words) James/Robbie, Max/Morse - general audiences - Gardens & Gardening, Fluff, Established Relationship, Reminiscence Watching James at his careful work—snipping off a branch or two, stepping back to consider the bush as a whole, snipping another branch—brings to mind another garden, much better kept than Robbie’s poor neglected allotment. A garden with roses that weren’t altogether dissimilar to these.

No Holiday - Shetland (TV) (1539 words) Jimmy/Duncan - mature - Extended Scene, Episode: s05e05, Angst Duncan raises the bottle to Jimmy’s retreating back, looks up at the Merrie Dancers, and takes a hearty swig. There’s not quite enough whisky left to completely dull the echo of Jimmy’s words in his head, but he’ll give it a go.

In the forests of the night Lewis (TV) (6846 words) James/Robbie - teen - Magical Realism, Alternate Universe, Shapeshifters, Love Confessions “I’m fine, lad. You’re the one who’s in danger.” “From what?” James swings his arms out wide to encompass the empty moor in all directions. “We’re trained police officers and there’s no one else here.” “From me,” Robbie says. Whether or not there are other dangers out on the moor, the danger Robbie poses is worse. If James doesn’t get going soon there’s nothing Robbie’s going to be able to do to protect him.

Over the Edge - Lewis (TV) (11809 words) James/Robbie - mature - Hurt/Comfort, Pining, Angst with a Happy Ending, Sharing a Bed, First Kiss Ignoring it then. James can do that. He can sit here while Lewis helps him on with the sling and not lean into his touch. He can get into bed once the sling is fastened and close his eyes and pretend the reason he’s breathing a bit heavier than normal is down to exhaustion and pain. It’s not untrue, even if it’s not the whole truth. He can accept the water and painkillers Lewis brings him, and not read anything into it when Lewis smooths the duvet over his chest and tells him to get some sleep. He can do that. He can close his eyes even though it’s not even properly dark yet and not think about the pain in his shoulder or the pain in his head or the pain of longing for Lewis to touch him and mean it. He can try to sleep.

Winter Wonderland - Lewis (TV)) (5530 words) James/Robbie - explicit - Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Romantic Cliches, Oral Sex, Fingerfucking, Only One Bed, but they never make it to the bed The radio has been going on about the unprecedented snowfall for the past two very slow hours of driving; two hours which would have been one without the snow. Astounding snowfall rates, the announcer keeps saying. What’s astounding is that they’ve made it here at all with how bad the roads are. What’s astounding is that Robbie has invited James on holiday. Not Laura, or Lyn, or anyone else, but James who he ought to have had enough of all day every day at work.

#inspector lewis #itv endeavour #bbc shetland #itv victoria #james hathaway #itv lewis #robbie lewis #endeavour morse #max debryn #laura hobson #jimmy perez #duncan hunter #lord palmerston #lady palmerston #lewis fic #my fic #fic year in review #that is a lot of fic and i'd actually kind of forgotten about some of the ones from the beginning of the year #long post

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karasluthqr · 5 years

Text

Twin Flames

As we all know, the season 14 finale of cm was an absolute disaster so I took it upon myself to write a lil fix it fic for the writers. This is how it should have happened. I hope you all like it! Enjoy!!

Spencer Reid has always had feelings for Jennifer Jareau, but he had resigned to the fact that they would never be more than just friends a long time ago. And that had been more than good enough for him. He had no desire to be in a romantic relationship with Jennifer, not in any sense of the word. He valued their friendship far more than the miniscule residual feelings he still held for her. Feelings that were locked away in one of his twelve imagined futures. Another one which stored his feelings for Derek Morgan. And one that played out the future he would’ve had with Maeve. His imagined futures were how he coped with his losses. Although he was a man who relied heavily on logic, he deviated from the, at times, faulty realism that defined him through his manufactured alternate realities.

The confession their UNSUB had forced out of JJ at gunpoint the previous day had left the doctor feeling shocked and even more confused. He replayed her words over and over in his mind.

“Spence, I-um-I’ve always loved you. And I was just too scared to say it before. And now things are just really too complicated to say it now.”

He couldn’t make sense of it. He analyzed every hesitation and hitch in her tone, every pause and avoidance of eye contact. He searched his memory desperately for clues that would lead him to some sort of reasonable explanation for the whimsical confession of love she had given, but he came up empty.

There were never any indications of JJ having such feelings for him. She brought Garcia on their “date” to the Redskins game fourteen years ago, and ever since, the two of them had fallen into a older sister-younger brother sort of rhythm. When Jennifer met Will, she didn’t give a glance in his direction nor did she express any hesitations to him. Spencer was the godfather of her sons! He and JJ; they were best friends. They looked out for each other. They loved each other, yes, but they didn’t love each other.

Spencer’s ability to remember every interaction he’d ever shared with someone rarely failed him, and Jennifer Jareau wasn’t fooling him this time. She’s always loved him? No, it wasn’t plausible.

_________________

Spencer was no longer listening to the conversation between Garcia, Tara, and Luke. He must’ve tuned out sometime after agreeing to dance with Penelope later on. His eyes were trained on JJ, studying her movements, facial expressions, and behavioral cues. Will was glued to her side as the couple made conversation with Matt and Kristy. Nothing in particular stood out to Spencer as peculiar other than JJ’s tense posture and the stiff grin she had plastered onto her face. But Spencer knew those observations could just as well be because of the awkward situation her confession had created as much as it could be about the confession possibly holding some truth.

His brow quirked with interest when Emily walked in, passing Matt and Kristy without so much as an acknowledgement and made a beeline to JJ. The smile that lit JJ’s face as Emily entered her line of sight triggered the profiler within him. He adjusted his slumped posture, straightening out his back. The wide grin that wore Jennifer’s face was the first genuine smile he’d seen from his friend since the consternation fueling events of the day before. Reid’s eyes narrowed in analyzation, determined to uncover the truth of JJ’s truth.

_________________

Spencer was unable to stave off the need he felt to watch JJ throughout the wedding ceremony. He picked up on the way JJ’s eyes followed Emily’s every move as she gave her toast, only looking away from their friend when she felt Will squeeze her hand at Emily’s mention of David and Krystall being “twin flames”. The look of, what could only be described as, shame that crossed her features as she forced a weak smile at her husband, only served to further peak Spencer’s interest.

Jennifer looked up, her stormy blue eyes meeting his gaze, and the unmistakable guilt clouding them caused his heart to constrict. Only on a few occasions had Spencer been able to read Jennifer so clearly, so few he could probably recount all of them in less than a minute’s time. He may know her tell, but JJ was the master of masks. She had one for almost every occasion. A mother mask, a wife mask, a work mask, a social gathering mask, etc. Underneath all of those masks, hid Jennifer Jareau, and only a select few had the pleasure to know her.

_________________

Spencer was beginning to unravel Jennifer’s secret and the blonde agent could tell. The scrutinizing gaze she was under was unnerving and caused her skin to crawl. It felt as though Spencer was staring straight into her soul, undressing the emotions she’s been keeping micromanaged for over a decade. Having to keep her feelings for Emily undetectable to Reid’s perspicacious mind all these years had been one of the hardest things she’s ever had to do. He was the one she told everything to, but this one thing, she just couldn’t. Not even when her life was being threatened. It was too big, too risky. Jennifer had so much to lose, as did Emily. The brunette was just now settling into a real relationship with someone, and Andrew was such a great guy. She was finally moving on and finding her own happiness. JJ wouldn’t have been able to live with herself if she had ripped that away and given the older woman hope once again for something that could never happen.

So she’d lied. And she was disgusted with herself for it.

JJ didn’t know exactly where Spencer’s feelings for her stood now, but she did know that once upon a time, he had something of a crush on her. Shortly after the Redskins game, the thought had slowly faded to the back of everyone’s mind, and it wasn’t brought to the forefront until just a few months ago, during their phone conversation about “imagined futures” and the revelation that he had twelve. That’s when JJ had begun to wonder, if one of them involved her.

Jennifer selfishly took advantage of that possibility yesterday. She didn’t know if it was true or not, but something deep in her gut told her that her inkling wasn’t far off. And to save herself, her family, and Emily from the pain of a confession years too late to be told, she used it against him to save their lives. It was selfish, she knew, and her stomach churned with an overwhelming guilt every time she looked at him.

She needed to tell him she didn’t mean it.

_________________

“Can I have a water?” Spencer requested as he approached the bar. The bartender nodded and turned his back to retrieve the order, and he felt the presence of another person slide into the space next to him.

“Hey,” a certain blonde greeted, trying with a little too much effort to sound casual. “So I-I didn’t get a chance to say it back there, but thank you for saving my life.”

There it was. The first genuine thing JJ had said to him in twenty four hours, sixteen minutes and fourteen seconds.

“You’re welcome.”

The tension between the two friends was nearly suffocating. Interactions between them had never been so uncomfortable. A sadness pulled at Spencer’s heart; things weren’t supposed to be this way between them, and part of him feared that things would never be able to return to the way they were before. Change had never been Spence’s strong suit.

Spencer embodied JJ’s discomfort as if it were his own. The way she couldn’t hold eye contact with him for more than a couple seconds at a time told him that whatever Jennifer had come up to tell him was weighing heavily on her subconscious.

“You okay?” He prompted, wanting to get her talking.

“Yeah,” the older woman breathed. Although she obviously wasn’t. “But Luke was right, though. Two guns, huh?” Jennifer’s tried smile wavered insecurely as she attempted to strike up a casual conversation and act as though the lie she’d conjured up the previous day hadn’t possibly caused permanent damage to their relationship. Spencer tilted his head and narrowed his eyes at her, unbelieving. “How long have you been wearing an ankle holster?”

“Around the time I got out of prison,” he answered shortly but still in his usual gentle tone. Spencer hoped she would catch on to the fact that he didn’t want to make awkward small talk; he wanted to have a conversation about what had transpired the day before.

“Right.”

Silence fell between the old friends for a painful few moments. Neither one looked at the other, only staring straight ahead and praying this mess could somehow magically fix itself.

“Look, so, um, what I said back there..” JJ broke the silence. She needed to clear the air; the tension that congested it was squeezing hers out of her lungs. “I, uh, I needed to say something that would get his attention, and I needed to say something that would get your attention, so you know, I just needed to throw him off balance-”

“Jennifer,” Spencer cut off the blonde’s ramble with the use of her full name. It was proven to be effective when needing to grab the woman’s attention.

_________________

JJ stilled. Spencer only called her ‘Jennifer’ when it was serious. Was he calling her bluff? Did he already know she lied, or did he think she actually meant it? Had she led him on like she had feared?

Apprehensive of the emotion she would find swirling around in his hazel eyes, the blonde hesitated before raising her gaze to meet his. What she saw: a challenging glare. It puzzled her; she was unable to detect any sort of emotion in his eyes. No anxiety, no guilt, no hope, no nothing. Just a challenging stare, like this whole mess of a situation was some sort of game to him.

“Truth or dare?”

The bluntness of his question momentarily startled JJ. A slight feeling of panic rose from her stomach at Spencer’s use of the question that had been spat in her face as she stared down the barrel of a gun just twenty four hours prior. She inhaled a calming breath to settle it.

As the feeling of dread began to dissipate, she noticed Spencer’s glare had eased from its previous challenge to a softer curiosity. He stared at her like she was a case, and she knew then that she hadn’t led him on. Spence wasn’t challenging her; he wanted her to tell him the truth.

He deserved to know; she knew that. She had played with his emotions in the most deceptive way yesterday. She’d already lied to him about Emily once before, and she’d nearly lost him because of it. But, this wasn’t the same thing. This would risk Will and her boys, the family she’d built over the last twelve years. This would risk Emily’s chance at finally moving on with her life and being happy with someone who was able to love her in the way that she deserved. This would risk the future of the team. Could she really risk all of that? Could she risk being responsible for the downfall of everyone she loves? Granted, it would feel so, unbelievably good to finally get her deepest, most darkest secret off of her chest, even if it was to just one person. But could she do that to Spencer? Could she trust Spence with this?

Looking into the most gentle, hazel eyes gazing into her blues with genuine concern, JJ offered him a sad smile. Of course, she could. It was Spencer.

“Truth.”

The word scratched against the dryness of her throat like sandpaper.

_________________

“Did you mean it?” His sincere question came out more like an accusation. He watched her face intently, analyzing her reaction. Jennifer didn’t say anything, but from the way her lips twitched between the slightest smile and her big, blue eyes that remained full with the look of sadness and guilt he’d observed in them since the confession, Spencer knew. She didn’t mean it. A wave of relief flooded over the younger agent. Now, he just hoped she would tell him the truth.

Spencer noticed her mouth adjust, preparing to open for speech, but before JJ could get a word out, they were interrupted by the one specific brunette that, unbeknownst to Spencer and JJ, was at the forefront of both of their minds.

Spencer Reid stood witness to the interaction that solidified his suspicion. He surveilled, with curious eyes, Emily Prentiss reach out and place her hand on JJ’s upper arm.

“Guys, they’re about to cut the cake.”

It was hard to miss. The way JJ’s shoulders dropped, releasing their tension at the older woman’s touch and how her entire face lit up with a radiant glow as she acknowledged her presence. Her blue eyes became a shade lighter and there was a noticeable sparkle to them. A sparkle he hadn’t seen in her eyes for a time that was exceeding far too long. Her gaze followed their Unit Chief as she began to walk away, the luminous smile still firm on her lips. It was very hard to miss indeed.

Spencer began to walk away. His suspicion had been confirmed, and it ran far deeper than he’d originally assessed. He no longer felt the need to pressure his friend into admitting it out loud as he now understood, it would be far too painful.

He felt a hand press firmly against his chest, pushing him back before he could get away.

“J-just,” Jennifer stuttered. Spencer retreated back to the spot he’d been standing in just a few moments before. “I-”

Spencer looked down at JJ with empathy as she pushed her blonde locks behind her ears. The distress that wracked her petite form was blatant and he understood what she was feeling all too well. He’d been there before.

“It’s okay,” he whispered earnestly to the woman before him. She had her finger curled and pressed against her lips, as if she was preventing something from tumbling out. She looked up at him, her eyes large and filled with hope for the possible relief of her secret tormentation. “Everything’s okay.”

JJ nodded.

“Yeah?” Her tone was quizzical, but he understood her hesitation. He knew how important it was for her that no one else could ever find out about what she felt for Emily. She’d risked her life, and his, with a lie to protect it. Spencer knew her questioning tone wasn’t just for him to assure her that her secret was safe with him, but that he understood how incredibly, and truly, remorseful she was for the selfish act. And he did. Because he’d done it before. When Cat Adams wanted him to admit a truth about himself that no one knew. But what she had wanted from him, it wasn’t a truth, so he’d had to lie, knowing that if he didn’t sell it, his mother would be killed. JJ was there with him the whole way. He understood.

_________________

Spencer nodded his assurance before he cleared his throat, composing himself for the verbalization of the confirmation that had just occurred.

“I know you meant what you said,” Spencer articulated, his utterance barely above a whisper. He was deliberate in making sure there was no way either of the two people standing just a few yards away would be able to overhear.

JJ’s brows drew together, a look of confusion crossing over her face. They’d just verified that she hadn’t meant it, unless some sort of severe miscommunication had just transpired.

“You just didn’t mean to say it to me.”

JJ’s heart stopped beating in her chest. Her breath caught in the back of her throat and she was sure her entire face had fallen sheet white. She knew that Spence knew. It was just the verbalization of it that threw her completely off quilter.

Spencer’s gaze flickered to the brunette standing next to the southern detective, and Jennifer followed his gaze. Her eyes landed on the two people she loved most, just one in a different way than the other. And the one that she could never have.

“Spence,” JJ choked on his name as she turned her back on the ones she felt she was betraying. The mascara coated rims of her eyes began to sting as tears welled in them. She felt an unbearable need to explain herself, to explain the string of questionable decisions she’d made over the last twelve years.

“Jennifer, it’s okay,” he soothed. The shame and the guilt oozed from her pores, and an agonizing need to comfort his suffering friend rose to the surface. She stared past him with pursed lips as her right hand gripped at her upper left arm. All were signs of the blonde trying desperately to maintain her composure, so Spencer made the quick decision to change the topic. “I know how you feel.”

JJ’s eyes snapped to his, bewilderment flashing onto her previously anguished features. He could read the question in her eyes. ‘What are you talking about? Who are you talking about?’

Spencer swallowed. Like Jennifer, his confession was something he had never shared with anyone before, not even his best friend.

“You might know him,” his voice was hoarse, sounding like he’d just finished screaming at the top of his lungs at a concert. The thought almost made JJ chuckle; Spence at a concert. The reality was that it was just nerves. It was the first time he was admitting to having an attraction for men out loud. “He got married two years, eleven months and ten days ago.”

Recognition flashed in JJ’s eyes as the understanding of who Spencer was referring to settled in. Derek. She tilted her head to the side as his gaze fell to the floor. He’d spent years grappling with his sexuality and a part of him, a large part, though he hated to admit it, still harbored feelings of shame regarding his attraction towards the same sex. Little did he know, JJ felt the exact same.

Jennifer was surprised to find herself feeling somewhat blase about Spencer’s revelation. She’d never actively considered Spencer being bisexual but she’d never outwardly denied the possibility either.

JJ recognized the familiar look of shame that wore Spencer’s downward tilted face, and it dawned on her that this was likely the first time he’d ever admitted this to someone. Momentarily forgetting about her own similar, and much more dire, predicament, JJ felt a sense of pride well up in her chest for Spencer’s courage to do what she never had. And what she now couldn’t.

She reached forward, grasping Spencer’s hand in her own. He lifted his gaze to hers when he felt her hand on top of his. She gave it a tight squeeze, hoping that it would be able to convey how proud she was of him for just being himself.

The corner of Spencer’s mouth twitched to form half a grin. His eyes shone with gratitude for her acceptance, although he never doubted for a second that she wouldn’t. Jennifer returned a tight lipped smile, her eyes shining with gratitude for the same yet entirely different reasons. For accepting her, but also for understanding the decision she made yesterday, and for being willing to aid in maintaining her long-held secret.

The reminder of her current predicament extinguished the heartwarming exchange between her and Spence as the gratitude on her face was once again replaced by sadness and guilt. JJ pulled her hand away from his and ran it over her face as she released a heavy sigh. Spencer’s frown and worry-filled eyes returned at the sudden change in demeanor.

Sparing a quick glance over her shoulder reminded JJ where they were and where they were supposed to be. Rossi’s wedding. Cutting the cake.

Spencer watched with concern for his friend as she walked away. He felt a pang in his chest when JJ glanced briefly at Emily before resuming her position at Will’s side, wrapping her arm around his neck and hugging him close. Spencer didn’t think it could get any worse, knowing JJ was in love with someone she could never be with. That was until he observed Emily cast a glance at the blonde behind her and the strained grin that she’d become accustomed to force after so many years. It would go undetected by many, but Spencer was able to pick up on the hint of despondency in her expression. His heart shattered with empathy for Emily as he found himself relating to his friend, reliving the heartache of watching Derek fall in love with Savannah, get married, and have little Hank.

If only JJ hadn’t met Will twelve years ago, maybe things would have been different. Maybe Jennifer would smile that smile that made her eyes sparkle much more frequently. His heart ached for his friends that missed their shot with one another. Now all that remained were the ‘what if’s and the if only’s’.

Spencer Reid and Jennifer Jareau really were twin flames.

#jemily #jennifer jareau #emily prentiss #spencer reid #jeid #jemily fanfiction #fanfic #criminal minds #what should've happened

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operaghostly · 6 years

Text

Eat the Apple part 3

Michael x Reader

Coco sat in Ms. Venable’s office retelling the events she just saw between you and Langdon.

“… and you know I just don’t think it’s fair that one of us be picked solely because of the intimate relationship we developed with the man making all of the selections.”

A small smile pulled at Ms. Venable’s lips as she turned and looked at Ms. Mead. “It looks like we have a problem to take care of.” She turned her attention back to Coco. “Thank you for informing us. We will take care of this situation.” The two waited for Coco to leave the room before saying anything to each other.

“What are you going to do?” Ms. Mead questioned.

“I have a few ideas in mind.”

After getting dressed for the day you headed down to the library with everyone else. You found your thoughts constantly turning to Langdon and the weird trance you broke out of the night before. Coco and Mr. Gallant stopped talking the minute you walked in. Emily greeted you with a friendly smile as you sat next to her. The conversations drifted back and forth; a bunch of meaningless nonsense. One of the greys approached you. You furrowed your brows in curiosity. “Ma’am, Mr. Langdon is requesting you."

You nodded and made your way to his office.

“Didn’t she already have her interview?” you heard Timothy question.

His office door was open, but he wasn’t inside. You stood in the doorway, unsure if you should go inside without permission.

“I wasn’t sure if you would come after last night.”

You turned to find him behind you. An amused expression on his face and his hands placed behind his back. You tried to avoid looking at his lips. Tried to forget how they felt on your lips last night. “You wanted to see me?”

“Yes,” he smiled, “I have a surprise for you.” He moved past you and motioned for you to follow. He slid the doors shut behind you. You looked around the room a smile tugged at your lips as you noticed the game by the sitting area. “Chess?”

You looked over at him.

“That’s the surprise.”

You sat down and he followed. You two began taking turns moving your pieces across the board.

All of a sudden the door slid open you turned around to see Ms. Venable standing in the door.

“I’d like a word with you, Mr. Langdon.”

His eyes were focused on the board. He waved at her dismissively. “Not now, I’m in the middle of something important.”

She entered the room. “I will speak with you now.”

He broke his gaze from the game to look at her a small chuckle came out of his mouth. “You may leave, Ms. Venable.”

You looked back and forth between the two and stood up. “No, it’s all right,” you stated, “I’ll leave.”

Langdon shot you a glare as you left the room.

You went back to your room not wanting to deal with the questions from all of the others. Michael’s attention towards you was starting to become noticeable. The next time you saw him you would tell him that you two needed some distance, you didn’t need any enemies not that you were really friends with any of them anyway. For the first time since last night, you were giving yourself a chance to think about what went on in the library with him. You were starting to regret not kissing him. Maybe if you were lucky you would get another chance.

As you lie in your bed fantasizing about Langdon, your bedroom door was thrown open. Ms. Venable stood in the entry way. “Follow me,” she commanded.

You quickly got up and followed her; her cane echoing throughout the hallway. She led you into an empty room with a few of her minions waiting.

“What’s going on?”

“Undress her.”

Her hench people came behind and started tearing at your dress. You struggled to get away as they grabbed at you.

“No!” you exclaimed. “Let go of me! I didn’t do anything!”

A small lament escaped Ms. Venable’s mouth. You looked over at her.

“You were seen last night with Mr. Langdon in the library,” she explained.

“Nothing happened,” you exclaimed.

She shook her head. “I don’t know that. All I have is your word. You should be grateful; normally we kill people for this type of insubordination. I’m letting you off easy.” A smile played at her lips.

You were stripped and handcuffed; Ms. Venable standing directly in front of you. She smiled sadistically as she spoke. “Now you will see what happens when you break my rules.”

She looked behind you and gave a single nod to the person standing behind you. You heard a swish in the air and a crack. It was then you felt the stinging on your back. With each thrash of the whip the burning intensified. You tried your best not to scream out, but the longer the whipping went on the harder that was becoming. Tears were streaming down your eyes. You thought it was never going to end until the door opened. Everyone turned to see who the intruder was: Ms. Mead.

“Ms. Mead,” Ms. Venable greeted her with a slight head nod, “I am showing Miss y/l/n what happens to those who choose to break my rules.”

Ms. Mead nodded in understanding. “Yes, ma’am.”

Ms. Venable turned to look back at you that grin still plastered to her face.

“Continue,” she demanded.

You were slumped over. You didn’t know how much longer this could last before you passed out from the pain. You bit down on your lip, keeping your cries to a minimum.

“What’s going on here?”

All heads turned to the door. Langdon walked further into the room. The saying if looks could kill ran through your head as you took in his expression.

“Miss y/l/n is being disciplined for her misconducts,” Ms. Venable announced.

Langdon cocked his head and moved closer to Ms. Venable. “And what misconducts would that be?” he asked. The two were staring each other down. An amused smirk presented itself on her face. “There is no copulation--”

“That is not a real rule,” Langdon interrupted, “the Cooperative has no problems with copulating.”

“No,” Ms. Venable agreed, “but I have instilled it to allow our resources here at the Outpost to last as long as possible. What would happen if a child were born? If it became sick how would we take care of it?”

Langdon now stood in Ms. Venable’s personal space. A smile stretched across his face. “I underestimated you Ms. Venable.” She snickered at his statement.

He stepped away from Ms. Venable and walked towards you. “You all may leave now. I will deal with Miss y/l/n.”

“We aren’t done--” Ms. Venable started.

Langdon turned back around to face her. “I said leave,” he hissed shooting daggers at her. The fear in Ms. Venable’s eyes was instant. Everyone left the room Ms. Venable the last to escape. Langdon walked back over to you. Fresh tears fell from your eyes. He brought his hand up to your face to wipe them away. He waved his hand and the handcuffs disappeared. He caught you before you fell to the ground and lowered you so you were sitting. He pulled his jacket off and covered you with it. As he lifted you back up, your back began protesting at being touched. He carried you to your room and laid you down on your bed turning you over so you were on your stomach.

He took his jacket off of you to examine your back. He breathed through his nose. “Your back is raw.” He went to your bathroom you heard him opening cabinets and turning on the faucet. When he came back he was holding wet washcloths. When he placed them on your back they were cold and help the burning sensation, but the contact made you whimper in pain. He went over to the desk by your bed and sat in the chair.

“I’m afraid that’s all I can do for now.”

You nodded in understanding.

“How long had she been going at it before I came in?”

“I don’t know,” you whispered, “it seemed like forever.”

“You should sleep it will help with the pain.”

You made eye contact with him. “Will you stay? Just to make sure she doesn’t come back?”

“Of course.”

You closed your eyes and soon drifted off to sleep.

It seemed like you had just closed your eyes when you were being woken up by a loud alarm going off. You were groggy and your throat was dry. You looked around the room to find Langdon sitting at the desk on his computer. The events of the previous day came flooding back to you.

“What’s going on?” you questioned your voice straining from the pain.

“Someone has breached the barrier,” he stated without looking over at you. He pushed a glass of water to you. “I’m sure you’re thirsty.”

You reached for the glass greedily. Relishing the feeling of how the water felt going down your throat and easing some of the pain. You set the glass back down on the counter when your thirst was quenched. Once you had finished Langdon stood up.

“Now let’s change those bandages.”

You looked down to notice that you torso had been covered in bandages. You looked at him questioningly.

“I did it last night while you were sleeping.”

You blushed at the thought of him seeing that much of you. He noticed the shade of your face and laughed. “Don’t worry. I didn’t look, too much.”

You let out a shaky breath as he kneeled next to you, and began removing your bandage. You covered yourself as best you could. “I don’t even know your name.”

He hesitated. “It’s Michael.”

You smiled. “Michael. Like the archangel,” you stated.

He let out an amused laugh. “I can assure you, y/n, I am no angel.”

He examined your back. “Hmmm, that’s odd.”

“What? I feel fine. Is anything wrong?”

“No. That’s your back is mostly healed. It should have taken weeks for you to recover from this.”

You shrugged your shoulders. “I heal fast, always have. One time I broke my arm and was supposed to be in a cast for a month, but it healed in a week. The doctor couldn’t explain it.”

You felt his fingers ghost over your back and it made you shiver.

His brows were furrowed. “Has anything else weird ever happened to you?”

“Like what?”

He started to back away from you.

“What’s wrong?”

He shook his head and grabbed his computer. “Nothing, I need to leave I have to think.”

You stared after him as he walked out of the room. You were hurt at how quickly he left. Was it something you said? You thought back on your conversation, but nothing seemed out of the ordinary. You went to the bathroom and tried to look at your back in the mirror as best you could. There were still a few areas that were tender, but for the most part the wounds had scarred over.

You stayed in your room for the rest of the day. Your only visitor was Ms. Venable who came by to tell you about the mandatory Halloween party. You didn’t care about some party and thought of Michael the entire time you were getting ready for the event. Would he be there? Probably not. He never showed up to anything.

As you were about to leave for the party, there was a knock on your door. You opened it to find Michael standing in front of you. A small smirk pulled at the corner of his lip. He moved into the room and shut the door behind him.

“Going to the party?” he inquired.

“Yes, it’s mandatory. Are you?” hope filling your voice.

“No, I have other plans,” he simply stated.

“Which are?”

“Spending the evening with you.”

He lifted his hand to play with a strand of your hair. He slowly leaned forward. Finally, his lips were on yours. The kiss started out slow, then his tongue ran across your bottom lip asking for entrance. You opened your mouth to deepen the kiss. His tongue danced with yours and your skin felt like it was vibrating.

You broke the kiss. “What about Venable?”

He shook his head. “Let me worry about her.”

He grabbed your hands and pulled you over to the bed. He sat down, sitting you on top of him. He began kissing and biting at your neck eliciting moans from your mouth. You ran your hands through his hair. He found his way back up to your lips, attacking them in hunger. He lifted his hips to grind into your core. You let out a moan as you felt how ready he was for you; your own arousal increasing, pooling in between your thighs.

He pulled away and lifted you off of him. “I’ll be right back.”

“Where are you going?”

He stood up and headed for the door with you on his heel. “I have to take care of something.”

“Right now?”

“It can’t wait.”

“I’ll come with you.”

He turned back around sharply. “No,” he commanded. He grabbed your chin to make you look at him. “You are to stay here until I come back for you do you understand? No matter what you may hear.”

“Yes.”

He bent down to peck your lips and shut the door behind him. You sat back on your bed breathing heavily.

Down in the fireplace room, Cordelia had just resurrected three of the coven’s sisters before stating, “There is another."

#american horror story #michael langdon #michael langdon x reader

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deviym · 5 years

Note

❝ that sounds overly valorous. ❞

SOUNDS LIKE PENANCE. AND HIS HANDS ? / HIS HANDS KEEP TURNING INTO BIRDS AND / FLYING AWAY FROM HIM.

she flies above your head, the grey sky, laughing. at you ? you don’t know, but you laugh / too.

“ no, no, ” you insist. “ i just want to be something, you know, amount to something, have people say, like, wirt played here, in carnegie hall. wirt left these poems behind for us. i want people to go through my journals when i’m dead like they did to emily dickenson, and publish everything, and make mine a name nobody will forget. ” you are saying / this, and then you are saying, “ i don’t just want to get us home, i want to be someone my brother can be proud of. someone you can be proud of, maybe. ”

and then you become / a hero/ then you split apart / the wood that grows around your brother. valorous ? maybe. oh, you have never seen true / darkness before. and then a light, the sky opening up / to swallow you. a way home. and in the light, a pair of scissors, / glittering, / engraved like a bird / in flight. the night still, the beast vanished / and the woodsman’s low sobbing / behind you, fading, / unseen. it is just / the three of you : you and your / still brother / breathing as you set him in the snow, beatrice fluttering to the reaching branches / of what almost became / your brother’s tomb.

“ i can’t exactly hold them myself, ” she says, so matter-of-fact, brusque / even / in precipitation of your going away / forever. for you know you will do everything in your power / to not end up back here / the next time. the last time.

you hold the scissors up to the light. “ won’t it hurt ? ” you ask. “ i don’t really know how these things work. ”

you think she would be / frowning. “ just cut my wings first. it’ll be okay, wirt. ”

so you kneel on the snow-covered ground and let her sit / on you legs, and carefully you raise the scissors / to her wings. you take a sharp breath in and close your eyes, and she says, “ keep your eyes open, you fool. do you want to kill me ? ”

very carefully, you snip at one of the longest / feathers. it drifts to the snow, a splash / of blue, a river on the ground. “ good, go on, ” she says, without any pain, and there is a trembling / in her voice. she is not one to say please but you can hear it, the sweet / anticipation / after so many trapped years. so delicately, precisely, you lift each feather and slice it away.

and somewhere between the first snip and the last, she has grown, and suddenly you are looking at a human / in a blue dress, with red hair piled atop her head, freckles across her face / kneeling on the snow before you, one hand still / in yours / from where you snipped off the tip / of her wing.

the light pours down on her, washing out her skin, her bird-bright / eyes. she is radiant, a halo of sunset around her face, / and you cannot / pull your gaze away. but there is something / forbidden, / intimate, an undressing of sorts, a curtain falling away before the stage / is fully set. and your conscientious heart wants to turn / away, to afford her / this privacy. but you have thought a thousand / faces, from the moment she told you / she was human. you want to know this one, / just once, / before you go. she is vulnerable, just a girl, not a wish- / granter, and in this moment she is stronger / than you have ever seen her.

“ thank you, wirt. ” it is almost / unreal, of all the unreal / things, here, to watch her voice / emitted from a human mouth, until you grow conscious of staring / at her mouth.

she reaches for the scissors, encloses / your hands in hers. for this moment, your hands are yours, with her hands / around them. she touches one of your palms, shocking, terribly / intimate, as though she has thought of you / the same way you have / of her. oh, little poet boy, if you think like that / it will ruin you. you don’t move. the first time you are this close to a girl you love ——— yes, love; say it, now, while / you can ——— and you are leaving her. this is a parting. this is the final / farewell.

and then the hope, spoken before / you can bite it down, like blood. “ come with us, ” you say, your hand still in hers. but she pulls her hand / away, two fingers lingering on yours, and then / gone.

“ i can’t, ” she says, one hand closed / around the scissors. “ i have my family to make human / again. ”

“ sounds like penance, ” you say. “ but it’s your choice. be happy, here. with them. i won’t forget you. ” and recall / another girl, somewhere, saying, maybe / i’ll see you again, making a promise / neither of you know / how to keep. you know you will dream / of kissing her / for the rest of your life, but you draw / away, lift your brother / again / onto your back. before you can second-guess yourself, / you stand up, leave her kneeling / there, and walk into / the light.

#perignotus #▐ ┋╰ ○ ⏤ ( answered. )#▐ ┋╰ ○ ⏤ ( ic. )#short n sweet :)))#this isn't the best rendition i could have given u but it's sweet so i hope u like it

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