#and im like ah . so ive been making that joke since i was 15 ?

[arowrath]

#text #copypasting a 21 chapter chat fic i wrote in 2018 into one big document #seeing glimpses of it #most of the time it's like. man. i did not write this #but then i see a phrase i was certain i came up with last year #and im like ah . so ive been making that joke since i was 15 ? #peer reviewed banger #rbsoff

[amoristt]

Grazing the Fire | IV

well hello. here i am, four years later, once again enamored with nathan enough to finally dust this baby off and pick up where i left it. im a little rusty so bear with me this chapter! much more to come <3

reblogs + tags and replies will make my entire day as i put a lot of effort into this :)! it also helps motivate me!

story continues beneath the read more. let me know if you can’t access it!

Warning: language, very vague s/a mentions

want to support me? heres my kofi!

__________________________

“Alright class, who can tell me,” A board stick clacks against the chalkboard. “Who can answer problem four?” 

A few hands raise in the corners of your eye, but yours remains atop your desk. Eyes far away, mind in a murky haze and almost completely unaware. All you could focus on were the memories playing on repeat within the confines of your tired, tired brain. Hours ago, you were warm, you were comfortable. Safe.

Cheeks heated to a dusting blush when you remind yourself just how you had awoken that morning. At some point in the night, an angel had blessed you. Allowed you to wake up wrapped around none other than big, bad, Nathan Prescott. Your face nuzzled into his chest, broad but wiry hands pressed firmly over your shoulder and his arm slung over your waist to keep you against him. Thankfully you had been the first to wake up, blinking away the morning sun blazing through his blinds and painting the room stripes of gold. At that moment, before your headache came crashing down onto your skull, you were astounded by him. 

Eye lashes brushing the top of his cheeks, his lips parted ever so slightly, chest rising and falling rhythmically. In that moment, there was no anger, no bitterness. Just a soft and peaceful slumber. It was like being the sole viewer of a magnificent painting- each stroke and detail placed just there just for you to pick out, to remember the curves and sharp edges down to the very foundation. From his unkempt hair down to the way his hand flattened onto the mattress where your indent still lived. Nathan was so beautiful like this. 

For a long time you stayed there. It was as though you were afraid to move- you couldn’t bear to disturb him. You had wondered, if he was always like this, so at peace, what would he be like? Likely soft voiced, mild mannered. He’d do his school assignments without hassle and donate to the charity board. He would wander the town with his friends and listen to music in a beat up truck flying down the stretch of highway overlooking the bold, blue, and beautiful ocean. An entirely different version of himself- carefree, and a fair blue as opposed to a burning flame of red. 

But, if that were the case, you’d never have gotten here. You’d never been both the outsider, and the only seeing eye. A lucky, albeit firstly unwilling witness to the display of depth before you. 

It never hit you like it had quite in that moment how lucky you were.

But- just then- an alarm disturbed what serendipity existed. You nearly leapt out of your skin, clutched your hands to your chest at the sudden sound. A headache wove its way into your once untouched temples. Nathan groaned, mumbled, ‘god damn it’, under his breath, and thus his body was reanimated into life. He rubbed his eyes and he stretched, that familiar scowl coming over his eyes and lips as he took in the sunlight damn near blinding him. A polar opposite to the being you’d appreciated just moments earlier.

“Ugh, fuck, how the fuck is it seven already.” He groaned. “I feel like shit.”

“Well good morning to you too,” You started, welcoming Nathan into the world. “‘I’m feeling pretty shitty as well.” 

You said that, but really… You were more than alright. Your head had hurt, slight nausea crept into the wells of your stomach, but other than that you’re sure you were phenomenally better than you’d have been waking up whereverTate would have left your ass.

“You need to get outta here, before everyone gets up.” Nathan drawled, but he didn’t sound as urgent as you expected him to be. You’d expected him to be angry that you were still in his room, but instead he just… accepted it. 

You snickered, climbing out of his throne of a bed. “Wow, you’re giving me the morning after treatment?” 

“Sure am. Get outta here, whore.”

“Oh fuck you.” 

You located your heels from last night, resting upright near his dorm room door. Heels didn’t sound like the most  practical to sneak out of a dorm with, so you instead opted to grappling them by the straps and carrying them at your side. Hair a mess, outfit riddled with wrinkles and makeup smudged under your eyes, you stood before Nathan in all your glory. He stared at you for a long, odd moment- and you for some reason felt exposed, or even, shy. 

“What?” You ask expectantly, placing a hand on your hip. 

His eyes trail to your line of vision. He shakes his head. “Just thinking about how now you really do look like my morning after.”

“Yeah?” You hummed. “Find it hard to believe you get a lot of those.”

Nathan shoots you a suggestive glance. “You’d be surprised. Everyone wants a piece of Prescott.”

Surely, he was joking, or maybe he wasn’t, but you… Didn’t like hearing that. It made your stomach feel odd, uncomfortably heavy.  As he stood up, reminding you how many inches he had over your size, you swallowed and cleared your throat to flush out that crappy feeling. “Well,” you started, mood having dropped. “I’m gonna go, then.” 

“What got your panties in a twist all the sudden?” He asked, raising a brow and pulling some clothes from his closet, tossing them onto the bed.

The bed you two had shared.

You hated the idea of his morning afters- whoever they may be. 

“Not feeling great. Probably a side effect of the roofies.” You mumbled.

Nathan breathed a laugh. “Probably.”

He seemed so calm, right now. Perhaps due to it being so early, before the outside world had a chance to remind him just why he was so uptight all the tight. Before he needed to be so uptight all the time. He really did have so many versions of himself- all of whom you were slowly becoming familiar with. Compared to the person you’d believed him to be before your run ins, you’d never have assumed someone so dangerous could be so soft as last night, as this morning. In the beginning, you’d feared him. Avoided him like a plague, or a wild animal. Even when you were enraptured in the existence of him, you still wanted to keep away. You’d never have believed someone like you could wake up clutched to his chest, as though he were afraid if he released you, you’d be gone long before he woke. 

Then, a sudden thought struck your mind. 

He’d held you so tight. He’d welcomed you in the morning. No anger, no annoyance. His soft laugh at your banter and taunts. How your heels were standing upright instead of tossed haphazardly into some random corner, where he’d watch your struggle to find. 

How he’d stayed awake to ensure your sleep.

“So are you just gonna stand there?” Nathan called you back to reality, hands gripping the hems of his shirt. “I gotta get ready and you need to wash up so you don’t look like a five dollar stripper.” Cruel words, but with absolutely no bite. You rolled your eyes.

“Yeah. But, hey,” You started. “Thank you for last night.” 

“Yeah, yeah. You gotta start learning to watch your own back.” He says. “There’s gonna be times I won’t be there to drag your ass out of the fire.”

If you’d been charged, if you’d been stricken with a strange defensiveness, you’d have retorted, ‘than stop helping me’, but… Instead you allowed yourself the comfort of protection. You allowed Nathan Prescott to watch you.  

“I know,” You reached for the door. “Thank you.”

With that, you bounded out of the dorm silent as a mouse. 

-----------

In hindsight, you should have left earlier. Class was merely 15 minutes away when you slipped out of Nathan's room and bounded towards the women's dorm. Albeit not exactly a long walk, by the time you discreetly snuck back into your own dorm, you had roughly twenty minutes to somehow pick an outfit from your countless unopened boxes and make yourself even slightly presentable. 

Wiping off whatever make-up you could get and reapplying it, brushing out the tangles of your hair and nearly tearing off your scalp in the process, scattering your nightclothes over your floor and managing to scrounge out a semi-decent outfit for the day… You still looked a mess. If the mirror could laugh, it would have. Black mascara smudges under your eyes and frizzy untreated hair. What a lovely look. 

You’d made it to class just five minutes late, but those five minutes were all it took for all eyes to be on you as you tried to slide into the classroom unnoticed. A couple classmates whispered to their table mates as you passed by, smelling of oversaturated cherry blossom perfume to hopefully cover the scent of alcohol. You sauntered to your seat and sank down with all your weight, suddenly exhausted. You’d made it with just five minutes tainting your record of attendance. The teacher greeted you with a disappointed sigh, and thus, the day began. 

But, it was so hard to focus. All you could think about was Nathan. 

“Alright class, who can tell me,” A board stick clacks against the chalkboard. “Who can answer problem four?” 

You lowered your head. 

“Ah, how about, ___?”

You snaked back into reality, blinking up at the chalk board that was somehow already riddled with math equations. Since you hadn’t been paying attention even in the slightest, your mouth gaped wide open, eyes scanning for something you understood even slightly so you didn’t look like a total idiot. 

Sadly, you were out of luck. The teacher shook his head. “I’m shocked,” He said. “You're normally so on top of things. Oh well.”

“Oh, I’m sure she was on top of things,” A female voice sniggered behind you “Last night.”

Your face flushed a red, hot, ruby. What the hell was she talking about? How had they found out you were with Nathan? You were so sure of being sneaky, there was no way-

“Her and Tate totally got it on last night.”

You whipped around in your seat, facing girls who looked to be clones of some sort. Both with the same dark eyes, short brown hair, and freckles. “What?”

“Alright-” Your teacher blurted. “That's enough. April, May, enough. Let’s not discuss things outside of the classroom.”

The two girls batted their eyes. “Sorry sir.” One spoke, twirling a hand through her hair. Her sister's wide toothy grin never fumbled. 

“Back to it then. Kate, can you help out __ with number four?” 

The small, blonde girl nodded quickly, brushing a lock of hair behind her eyes and offering an empathic nod. 

As you turned around in your seat, her answer fell on deaf ears. Your heart was racing in your chest, hands balled into fists while you stared ahead blankly.  

They couldn’t seriously think that you chose to leave with Tate, could they? Surely someone must have seen the state you were in. Someone other than Nathan.

The clock ticks forward but time feels like it's passing almost unnaturally slow. With just 10 minutes left, you feel your phone vibrate in your pocket.

‘Nathan: consider ur favor officially returned 

Your tongue poked from your lips, the tiniest of smiles taking over your once sullen features. Terrible thoughts and worries flew out the window while you type back, ‘damn. here i was gonna to ask you to do a backflip off the roof with me. there goes my plans.’

Nathan types for a moment. Typing, stopping, typing again. 

‘Nathan: soundz like a blast. where and when?’

A small blush heats your cheeks. ‘very funny. thanks to last night i have an entire 24 hour session of studying to catch up with.’

His response is almost instant. ‘Nathan: boringgg. txt me when ur fun.’

Rolling your eyes, you shove your phone back into your pocket. It seems you’ve been able to secure enough of a friendship with him for some mindless banter even outside your little visits. You smile. He’s… Fun to talk to. Surprisingly. 

Class comes to an end and you start to pack up the books and papers you’d hardly even glanced at the whole period. Whatever had been upsetting you before is lost in your mind while you think of the morning, the night before. All the things in-between. But, your happiness doesn’t last long. As you get up, you’re almost forced right back into your seat as a weight shoves into your shoulder. Your books scatter to the floor. April, the one who’d remarked about you earlier, glares at you in what looks to be disgust. 

“Careful April,” Her sister hums as she saunters past you, keeping distance and raising her already shrill tone of voice. “Might wanna watch where you’re walking- I’d hate for you to catch something from this slut.”

You absolutely gawk at her. “What the fuck did you just say to me?”

April scoffs. “Oh come on, like everyone doesn’t know what you were up to last night.”

“Sleeping around isn’t a good color on you.” May hikes her bag over her shoulder and snickers at you. They both leave the class together, sickeningly in sync. You’re left stunned where you stand, unsure how the hell your life came to this so quickly. How you’ve stooped so low that the daughters of the world's most uncreative parents are able to bully you based on something that didn’t even happen.

Next class goes no better. The person to your right, a jockey looking brunette guy, asks, ‘have you ever heard of a Tate?’. You say no, that that’s the dumbest name you’ve ever heard. The idiot grins and goes back to marking down likely wrong answers on his test sheet and you debate kicking the leg of his chair out- but you don’t to avoid even more eyes on you. It makes you sick to your stomach- even more than recovering from the roofies does. How can everyone believe it? You barely even knew the guy and you were clearly uncomfortable with his advances. No one saw that? 

After everything you’d worked for to build a reputation, trying so hard to not call out peoples shit for the sake of seeming friendly, tainted over something that didn’t even happen? And the kicker was that it hadn’t even been your fault! He’d drugged you, he’d have taken advantage of you! Yet you were the bad person? 

Class came and went in the blink of an eye this time. Your mind wrapped up in the situation, your stomach churning. You wanted the day to be over with but you still had 4 more classes to suffer through. Why was this happening to you? Was Tate being treated just as horribly, or was he getting pats on the backs of his unaware friends?

Wandering down the halls to your locker, you noticed Lance and Kaz hanging around one of the drinking fountains. Your nerves quelled- your friends would surely make you feel much better. Especially since they had witnessed how awful you were feeling as you left. You approach with a relieved smile, ready to say your truth and finally have someone on your side.

“Hey guys.” You smile, but Lance looks down at his feet while Kaz places her hands to his hips. Your smile fades.

“You could have told us you were gonna spend the night with Tate,” Kaz snaps. “You didn’t need to lie like that just to leave. We were all worried about you and it was for nothing.”

“What?” You feel like you could cry. “No, Kaz, I really did try to leave. Tate tried to drug me and take me home, and-”

“He wouldn’t do that.” Lance interrupts, with a frown. He looks back down at the floor with knitted brows. “I’ve known Tate since before time. He wouldn't do something like that, especially not to one of my best friends. Plus he told me he was really into you. Why would he even try?”

“Are you serious?” You sputter. “You think I’d lie about something like that?”

“You’ve been lying about all sorts of things!” Kaz huffs. “What’s going on with you lately? You’ve been so distant, and secretive. What are you hiding that’s making you lie like this? We’re supposed to be your friends and then you lie to our faces just to go and fuck the first guy that shows you attention.”

“What…?” It was like acid. It was like the rug had been pulled from your feet sending you spiraling down the unending cliff. Kaz, your best friend, all that venom. How could they turn against you like this? What the hell is going on? You felt your throat tighten. “Look, I’m sorry if I’ve been distant, but I’m not lying to you, I-”

“We gotta go.” Lance isn’t in the mood to hear it. “We’ll catch up to you.. Some other time.”

Kaz says nothing as she pushes past you. Lance, at least, spares a short glance over his shoulder. You stood there alone in the hallway, your bag falling off your shoulder and clattering onto the floor with a thud echoing off the walls. Everything you had, all gone at once. 

No one believed you.

---------

With nowhere to go where you felt like you could truly allow yourself to process the day's events, you went to the only place you knew. 

Just outside of campus, where rocks lined the edge of the boundary, overlooking the outskirts of the town and the ocean stretching as far as the eye could see. You settled yourself there, staring at the vast waters and wondering how this had all happened. Unlucky didn’t even begin to cover how it felt. Not only did you feel violated with Tate attempting to do unthinkable things with your unconscious body, but you also felt alone, and walked on. Your best friends hadn’t believed you. While Lance seemed saddened, Kaz was so… Angry. Her words cut like knives into your skin. 

It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair. You didn’t deserve this.

You want to talk to Nathan, but knowing him, he’d see your state and bounce instantly. After all, this isn’t exactly very fun of you.

As the sun began to fall, splaying orange and blues over the wide open sky, behind you, you could hear voices. A group of them, some male, some female. Memories of when your notebook had gotten snatched by those two horsed face assholes came flooding back and with all your alertness, you stood up, and decided that this sitting place was no longer safe. Nothing was.

Before you even made it ten feet away, the group had found their way to your spot and gotten comfortable, one of the girls cheering, ‘this’ll be our hangout! look at how pretty the view is!’

You took a short drive down the stretches of road and decided that if you were going to lament in your own sadness, you were at least going to do so in a place that had something to cover the sound of your tears. Plus a nice view.

The beach, littered with its picnic tables and the sounds of crashing waves would suffice just fine. So, you pulled in the desolate parking lot and wandered down the sandy shores until you stumbled upon a picnic table shaded by a large willow cascading lushious branches to block out the sun- a perfect canopy for you to wallow under. 

You had nothing at that moment. No friends, no reputation, no one to believe your tragic tale. And now, you’d just lost the one spot that made you feel comfortable when stress was building into your body like concrete. Tears pricked into the corners of your eyes and you bit your lip, dreading that feeling of a lump in your throat. Why you? Everything had been going so well. How could not even a single person believe that Tate had tried to hurt you?

Well, actually, there was one person.

Of course Nathan believed you. He’d been the one to rescue you, after all. Time and time again it seemed.  How was it that even the ones closest to you would turn their back so fast, yet Nathan seemed to be there even when you didn’t want him to be? Even when you yelled at him, and he yelled right back, fire and sparks falling into embers around the two of you. 

In that moment, you almost felt like you could finally relate to him. A reputation based on lies and things out of your control, paired with a hardheaded attitude to try and combat all the assumptions. 

No wonder he was so angry. 

“Hey bitch,” A voice suddenly called, and you had a split second moment where you were terrified of once again being the victim of a cruel prank or some classmates boredom. “How about next time you have a pity party you don’t fucking call me in the middle of it.”

You blinked away your tears and through the blurriness saw a figure coming towards you. All that sass, the tone...

“Nathan?” You breathed. It only takes moments before he’s in front of you, holding his phone in view, seeing that the call that had been running for nearly ten minute. You flush in embarrassment, pulling your phone from your back pocket. “How did that happen?”

“Well, can your ass dial numbers?” He taunts, ending the call. 

“Damn it, dumb phone must have butt-dialed you. I knew I should’ve gotten a different one.” You mentally kick yourself. “It must have unlocked in my pocket.”

“You don’t have a password on your phone?” He taunts. When you shake your head, he whistles. “You are just begging for a robbery. I’ll keep that in mind when I’m in the mood to send random messages to all your buddies.” 

“Fuck off.” You scowl, and he grins, hopping up on the picnic table next to you. The sun flatters his skin. He’s almost glowing. 

“Speaking of buddies, how the hell did it pick my number out of your sea of friends?”

You shrug. “Probably cuz’ it’s a priority contact.” 

“Oh lala, I’ve been upgraded to priority huh? Does it display a superman logo whenever you give it a ring?”

“Nope. When I press call it rings the nearest asshole in my vicinity. The fact that it’s you is your own problem.”

“Haha, fucking ha.” He leans forward and rests his elbows on his knees. He stares out at the water, watching waves pull and crash onto the beach. It’s almost beautiful, until he ruins it. “Yknow, you’re a really ugly crier.”

“Wow, thanks.” You shake your head. “That's exactly what I needed to hear right now. Why did you even stay on the line?.” Wiping your eyes, you start to forget your tears. “Couldn’t have been that wild of a conversation.”

Nathan shrugs. “Between the crying and the sound of the waves it was pretty nice.” He grins. “Very educational.” 

“Awesome. Glad I was able to make your day.” It doesn’t feel like your usual bitey remarks. You’re tired, you’re still a little hurt and you can’t stop thinking about how such an amazing morning had turned into such a horrible day.

“So what’s got you all fucked up? Never seen you act like this big of a baby before.”

“Nothing. You already paid off your debt to me per this morning, so feel free to resume our regularly scheduled mutual hatred.” You say, lying through your teeth. You know you’re both past the point of hatred, but you’re feeling jaded, you can’t help it. 

“Oh shut the fuck up,” He groans. “I didn’t drag my ass all the fucking way out to this shit hole of a beach just for you to give me that bullshit. What, did you fail a test? No one matched you on tinder?”

“Everyone thinks me and Tate slept together last night.” You blurt. “I think he’s telling people me and him had sex.”

Nathan tenses his shoulders and grimaces. “Fucking werido.”

“I told my best friends that he tried to take advantage of me and they don’t believe me. One of em’ even said he wouldn’t do something like that.”

“Fuck em’. Who needs best friends.”

“And to make everything so much better, these two bitches that I share four of my classes with harassed me all goddamn day. I mean, fucks sake, how the hell are girls named April and May of all things able to get to me. It’s bullshit. And to make matters worse, Tate is just… Getting away with it.”

“Yeah well, something tells me that Tate’s gonna get a real nice fucking taste of medicine eventually. I just gotta find him first. He’s got a lot of nerve spreading shit around given I knocked his ass onto the pavement.” Nathan brows knit at the memory.

You test the waters. “Why would you do that for me?”

He seems caught off guard, or maybe, surprised that you’d ask. Maybe he thinks you’re both beyond that point. He grumbles, “Why does it matter.”

“I’m just curious. We don’t owe each other anything, remember?”

“Yeah, well,” He huffs. “Don’t ask me questions to shit I don’t know the answer to.”

“You say that an awful lot.” You tease.

“Yeah well you ask dumbass questions an awful lot. Not everything I do has to have some weird ass motives behind it, ___. Maybe I’ve got beef with Tate that’s outside of you.”

“Uhuh. Sure.” You’re about to say something else, when your phone lights up with a text. The display makes your heart fall all over again. 

Unknown Number: you should just pack up and go somewhere else. no one wants std’s from breathing your air xoxo

You don’t even know who that is. Now absolute strangers are on your case. You want to throw your phone into the ocean and leave.

Nathan scoffs. “Don’t even bat a fucking eye for that bitch, whoever the hell they are. Half the hoes you’ve mentioned have slept with half the football team,” he pinches his jacket, “and I would know.”

“Ew, Nathan,” You grimace, that same feeling from the morning returning. It feels, oddly, like jealousy.  He nudges your arm with his elbow and grins playfully. It’s cute.

“Chill, I’m just fucking with you. You gotta know even I wouldn’t fuck girls that desperate. I’m a man of class.”

That last comment actually forces a laugh from you. It’s soft, but it’s real. The first laugh you’ve genuinely had all day. “That’s horrible.” You remark, giggling again.

It's almost like the slight restoration of your mood puts him at ease as well. He leans back on his hands and stares off into the ocean, those sparkling waters under the setting, orange sun. “I’m for real though. Those hoes aren’t worth your time. One day when we blow this shithole of a town they’re not even gonna matter.”

Your brows knit, eyes blinking up at him. Had you heard that right? 

“We?” You ask, perplexed, albeit a little… Hopeful.

Nathan sputters. “Well- Like, when everyone’s older and-”

“You know what, it's fine.” You interrupt. “Fuck it. You’re right. We’re gonna blow this town and they’re just gonna be some shitty memories.”

He sucks in a shaky breath. You’ve never heard him scramble like that, like he’s been unmasked. The look he casts you when you agree, when you don’t tease or patronize and finally hop on the idea that yeah, what if the two of you really didn’t have to deal with it anymore.

What if the two of you could just exist, without the anger. 

You look up at him. “Would you actually do that though?” You start. “With me, of all people?”

He swallows. His expression is tense, but he’s not upset. He appears nervous, caught off guard. Nathan tries, “I-”

Your phone rings. Shrill, piercing. Mood destroying. 

“Jesus Christ, it’s my mom.” You grab your phone and Nathan looks forward, stone faced and silent as you hop off the table and answer. It’s your mother, who all but shouts into the phone that her and your father are taking a surprising visit to Arcadia Bay while they’re traveling by on their vacation. She insists that you be ready in about an hour for dinner, and likely there will be family photos. 

Which means if you still look as wrecked as you did this morning, you’re gonna have a lot of washing up to do. With a quick goodbye, a short and sweet, ‘love you’, you hang up and sigh. 

“You still tell your mom you love her?” He teases. “What are you, five?”

You frown. “You don’t tell your parents you love them?”

Nathan side eyes you, and just shrugs. It is all the answer you need, really, and for his sake you decide it wouldn’t be best to press the issue. Not now. But- it still makes your heart hurt just a little. You wished that he’d had it better growing up. 

“Right… Do you want a ride home?”

“Fuck no, what am I,” He shoves his hands into his pockets. “a fucking girl scout?” 

“I was just offering, weirdo.” When he doesn't get up, you feel like you’re missing out. Like if you stayed, maybe, just maybe, you’d get to know him a little better. “Hey, if you want, I can stay for a bit longer.”

He rolls his eyes. “You’re needed elsewhere. But,” he shrugs. “I don’t know. Fuckin’... Text me or something. Or not, I don’t care either way.”

There’s a small warmth in your chest that rises to your cheeks. He wants you to text him. “Yeah,” You say. “If I’m feeling fun.”

And with that, you bid him farewell, beginning your descent to the parking lot. 

“Hey,” He calls, and you turn just in time to catch a small item he’s tossed right at you. A tiny key resides in the palm of your hand. “Spare. If shit hits the fan again-...” He shrugs, and actually looks away. “Just don’t be too fucking loud of I’ll kick your ass out myself. No Madison needed.”

The widest grin plays over your lips. “I’m gonna re-decorate your room while you’re gone.”

“Ah, you fucking better not.” He shouts. “Actually- you know what, give it back.” 

“No, no! I’m sorry.” You play with the key between your fingers. “Thanks for this.”

“Yeah, whatever. Don’t lose it and remember- emergencies only. I don’t need you watching me sleep like fucking freak. We’re past that stage.” 

“How many times will I have to say I was never watching you. Christ… But, alright. See ya, then.” The key is heavy in your palm. 

You place it into your pocket and give him one last glance before you take off, leaving him to enjoy the sound of waves, birds, and the absence of your tears.

#nathan prescott #nathan prescott x reader #life is strange #grazing the fire #scenario #fanfic #fluff

[youranxiousnerd]

The Transformation Thoughts

bc hsmtmts said gay rights

spoilers below

yesss seb doing the recap

wait did seb just say he was crying?!?! give him a hug 

cow baby!!!

wow miss jenn and seb having a civil conversation

Natalie is back!!

ej and ricky with the mask

kourtney’s outfit!!!

ashlyn’s outfit...

ahh so the awards and the show are separate, good, that’s how it works

RICKY’S SHIRT!?!?!?! 

i love it

ricky is lgbt do not try to convince me otherwise

ASHLYN IS SINGING IT IS BEAUTIFUL

like pop off

ricky and the mask

that mask is the true villain in season 2

“Belle, I-” flops

Ashlyn is carrying the scene, she is such a good Belle

how is ricky allowed on stage oh my god

the cap

that damn mask

“It’s okay, it was just my face”

Miss Jenn is hanging on by a thread

finally some ashlyn and ricky content

“Which they will” buddy have you faced the music? Have you seen Ricky?

“I think I might have been playing Troy at one point”

Miss Jenn needs help from someone who isn’t a teenager

“Mother is freaking out” High school theater at it’s finest

“There is math involved”

“OH” 

sassy seb

i can’t with east high’s tech crew, what are you doing?!?!

and why are the actors figuring out the tech stuff?!? i’m sure kourt, big red, ashlyn (she knows all), and seb (he lives on a farm) know what to do. 

the crew cannot be that bad

btw here are my thoughts on this scene

guys it is ashlyn’s house not yours

portwell shoulder bump

ASHLYN I LOVE YOU

OH SO NOW YOU HAVE DRILLS

WHERE WERE THEY WHEN THE TECHIES STARTED USING GLUE ON PLYWOOD!?!?!?!

I WANT ANSWERS

i. cannot. with. this. show.

lily wtf

“is this too weird” yes

like why?

lily like actually shut up

big red’s “wtf”

let her be evil damnit

“i’m just not well liked here” i wonder why

that was really weird, anyways

“he gets weird around tools”

me too

no give big red the drill he knows how to use it

someone write a fic about the girls and seb’s chaotic target run

why don’t you have a blackout and dramatic music and lights for the transformation, i know it isn’t award level but if done right it can be pretty dope

“I don’t know if my parents will be okay with me being at a co-ed sleepover”

“Chip, this is your mother speaking, go call your mother”

HE DID THE FINGER GUNS

GAY TABLE SIT AND FINGER GUNS THEY DID THEIR RESEARCH

ashlyn’s bucket

CARLOS GAY TABLE SIT

OH MY GOD

they’re so gay soulmates

let big red have his skateboards

“i need to talk to seb at some point but it can wait” honey no it can’t wait seb is on the verge of a breakdown

wait they havent talked in a week

Im a hypocrite ive been dancing around someone for three years

“You’re still at school”

“I’m worried about my children” “She means us”

such a high school theater thing (like i got married during high school theater, we had a family tree)

“ah, Sebby”

“Now I’m pretty sad” give him a hug

the girls ship seblos

“But, I guess he has to be, out of default, right... there’s not a lot of choices for a boy like Carlos, here, at East.”

alright here come the tears 

why...why couldn’t he say “gay” or “queer” or “lgbt”?!?!

“Not so good at saying the feelings part out loud”

shiz that hit close to home. 

Seb is just making me cry today, isn’t he?

wait so we’re just going to change the subject? coming from a queer person, opening up about your problems about your sexuality is hard. like, there are things that happened years ago im just telling people. 

“You’re my sister, he’s my cousin”

it seems everyone except nina knows about the chocolates. imagine gossip time when gina told people write a fic

Nini just stop talking. It wasn’t a big deal, simple mistake. Not everything has to be big and dramatic

and wasn’t she just asking about Gina and Ej? 

Nini for the love of god it is not something to read into.

“The farmer type”

Ash and Red exchanging gossip

wait... why are they texting about this?

“Why wouldn’t he say something to me?” It’s a hard conversation to have. “hey are we together just because i’m your only option?” 

“Okay, pretty boy” HE CALLED HIM PRETTY BOY

RICKY!!!!!!!!!!

!!!

carlos and gina chaotic siblings

give ej a hug 

“Sweet boy”

im so glad the guys are talking about their feelings.

Why a sleepover? It’s more of a hangout.

“Verging on failure”

jennzara therapy

slowwww burn

you go from hand holding to fist bump

disney please release an acoustic version of “let you go”

so it’s just carlos and ricky chillin’ at big red’s house?

do not play let you go for nini

do. not.

“You guys are a hallmark movie”

for once ricky is being smart

“the look on your face when you were talking about Seb tonight” smiles

he is so whipped

“I think you and Seb have something worth fighting for...bro”

that was so sweet and then there is bro

i love this show

“Sorry, I’m adjusting to being called bro” 

him and seb being awkward about feelings... that is a high school relationship

i love ricky in this scene

“Yeah, let’s just write”

ASHLYN CALLED BIG RED BABE AWWWWW

nina shut the actual hell up

“It’s in the costume shop, somewhere” mood

“Thank you, 15″ THEY SAID THE THING

GAHHHH

I LOVE IT

howie and kourtney oh my god what is happening

 “and begging”

“hi” he’s so nervous oh my lord.

he is so awkward around seb 

it’s like a switch

“Do you want to get risotto with me sometime” OH MY GOD THATS ADORABLE

GINA BABY HE LIKES YOU 

GINA HONEY!!!

AWWW THAT WAS ADORABLE

PORTWELL YESSSS

gina’s little run

“Am I in trouble?” 

they’re so nervous 

oh my god its time

“You keep it all bottled up” GUYS I CANT ARGGGG

can ricky just like, go behind a curtain?

“lookin’ for our kind of love” carlos basically just said “i love you”

seb is so whipped like look at him?

they’re so in love

seb’s little eye role at “in a heartbeat, i choose you”

the hands omfg

oh my god they’re going to dance

SHIZ THE HOMECOMING SUITS

I WAS RIGHT

OH MY GOD

SHIT GUYS IM DYING

gah the hands i cant

carlos is leading i love it

the tie

a tie just killed me

im combusting

You’re honor, they’re in love

i really thought carlos was going in for a kiss he is probably getting one later

i like how the dance isn’t big, it’s small and a little awkward bc right then it’s just them.

THEYRE SO IN LOVE HOLY SHIT

damnit big red

big red is legally required to interrupt almost kiss moments especially if it’s an lgbt kiss bc we cant have two in one season

in a heartbeat is so cute. Frankie showed UP this season with the vocals. there is no way that was all acting bc they looked so in love.

I...I love it

the lyrics are perfect

In a Heartbeat and Let You Go are probably the best OG songs of the season

“Siri, add In a Heartbeat to my gay sob playlist”

these boys are just serenading each other left and right 

“Yeah” 

so it’s just “yeah”!?!? That’s it!?!?! Seb could have least kissed him on the cheek or did they use all their kisses?

I love the song and love the scene, but there is so much more to discuss. Are we going to brush over the fact that Seb literally had an allergic reaction and didn’t get help because he didn’t want to disappoint Carlos!?!? Are we going to brush over “no, seb” and seb feeling like he has to get carlos big things!?! One “yeah” doesn’t erase all that. I’m hoping we get closure, proper closure, not a joke. 

In conclusion, only one thing was settled (Carlos loves Seb for Seb, not because he is the only out guy in school).

“Seb and Carlos suffer their first fight” effing liars

BTW it looks like they filmed the dance scene with the homecoming suits and normal outfits so disney release the footage

Ricky is the biggest Seblos shipper

“Bro”

you morons. are you using rigging without an adult there?!?!

im pretty sure that isn’t allowed. only trained people were allowed to use the rigging. it should be Natalie since she did it in HSM

you should have gotten mats are something or stand in a circle

gahhh

RICKY

OH MY FRICKING GOD

NO ONE RAN THEY JUST WATCHED WTF

WTF WAS THAT ENDING

UMMMMM NO

i legit have no words oh my god 

they just killed the lead

you guys saw the rope you should have ran 

you should have gotten mats or blankets or something just in case

rigging is difficult, set rigging and people rigging

EAST HIGH WTF

Looks like the sleepover is going to be in the ER

My gay heart is full but my theater heart is screaming. The episode went by really fast. I liked it, like a lot.

To answer the question, no, I am not okay @organic-guacamole and we will have a theater kid sleepover

#disney+ #hsmtmts #hsmtmts season 2 #hsm series #hsm the series #High school musical the musical the series #ricky #ricky bowen #nini salazar roberts #nini #nina salazar roberts #nina #gina #gina porter #ej #ej caswell #portwell #ashlyn caswell #ashlyn moon caswell #ashlyn moon #ashlyn #big red #redlyn #kourtney greene #kourtney #seblos #seb #seb matthew smith #carlos #carlos rodriguez

[thecampfirestory]

If I had a soul I would be willing to sell it for more Logan hcs. (you mentioned that asks are slower so I thought it wouldn't be a bad time to ask) Hope you have a good morning/day/night time zones are weird

Ok so i dont have any hcs but i do have a lil scenario between him and Patton i was JUST thinking about

Since Patton and Lo live close to each other, Patton is constantly going to Logan's place

And its always super sudden most of the time Patton just texts him "hey im outside open up"

And Logan immediately answers cause hes the type of guy to have different ringtones for each of his friends so he knows its Patton and goes to open the door right away

But this time Logan doesnt even sees Pat's texts

So Patton stays outside for like 15 minutes still texting Logan in hopes the spam of messages will make him check his phone

He groans especially cause he knows Logan is home. He didnt have a shift at work today

And even if something last minute had happen like idk Roman asked him to hang out Logan would STILL check his phone

And Patton is not going back to his home his dad is there ew

And after some other 5 minutes of him tapping his foot in annoyance he goes fuck it and enters through the kitchen's window

"You spend the whole day on your phone why not now? Ive been out for like an hour " He yells. No response

"Logan???" Nothing

He goes up the stairs and hears music blasting from Logan's room. Ah. Maybe thats why

"If youre dancing like an idiot im not gonna have mercy this time and im gonna record you!"

Once Patton gets there Logan is nowhere to be seen.

His phone is charging and the music is BLASTING from Logan's tv and its so loud Patton had to turn it down a little

"Okay NOW im getting worried" Pattom says to himself as he leaves the room and starts going down the hallways checking every room looking for his friend

"Logan???" He calls one last time

Then Logan's head pops down FROM THE CEILING and it took Patton a solid second to realize he was in the attic

"JOHNATHAN!" Logan calls very enthusiastically yet nearly giving Patton a heart attack

"What are you doing up there?"

"Im checking out my dad's stuff! Theres TONS of instruments here! Come up, check it out!!!"

As Patton goes uo the stairs to the attic Logan starts explaining "I was rather tired of playing just my guitar and i thought that maybe my dad had some instrument saved up in here i could try. He used to be a musician, you know? So i gave it a shot and came up here and theres so many of them! And theyre all in perfect state! Im taking the bass, the electric guitar, the keyboard, and i found a kalimba, i left it somewhere...im taking them all to my room to learn how to play them"

"I think youre getting just a tad obsessed with music, Lo" Patton mentions with a teasing smile

"I cant help it!" Logan replies with a smile as well "Its so fun, and interesting, and fascinating...I...I havent picked up a book in a good while now, I just cant get music out of my head" and for some reason Lo sounds a little embarrassed about it

"Well thats great. Youre our music guy now." Pat smiles "Still a nerd, though. Our music nerd"

And then Patton starts checking out the things in the attic as well, and just like Logan said, theres indeed TONS of instruments there, all in perfect condition"

"How about you learn how to play the banjo? thatd be pretty cool" Pat jokes at one point. And he chuckles when Logan says "oh DEFINITELY. Just let me get the hang of the bass and electric guitar first and i'll get my hands on that banjo". Especially because he sounded genuinely serious

After a while, Patton finds a big case

"Whats that big one?" He asks

"Oh? Oh. Thats my dad's drum kit"

"And you dont wanna try it out?" He asks, getiing closer to it

"I dont think i have enough coordination to play it. That and i think its too loud, at least for me" Logan shrugs

"I could use some loudness back at my house, if im honest"

"Do you wanna keep it?" Logan asks

"What?"

"The drum kit. You could take it home and learn how to play it" he replies "You definitely have the coordination, and, i dont know, since hitting things helps you let some anger out, this could help. You could, like, pretend its your dad's face or something"

"That sounds very tempting" Patton replies, and both him and Logan chuckle a little bit

"No, but seriously, i mean it"

"Logan, no. Its your dad's"

"He gave up on these instruments a while ago. He only plays piano and my guitar if he feels like it. Im sure hes okay with it!"

"Even so, if my dad sees this on my room he will get rid of it the moment i leave my room!"

"Then we can just keep it here and you can come to practice whenever you want!"

Patton just gives him an unconvincing glare

"Come onnn... lets be music buddies, Pat!"

And after a while of Patton eyeing the drum set, he sighs. It does sounds very tempting

"Okay. But ask your dad if hes okay with it"

"YES!"

#ask #campfire!logan #campfire!patton #campfire!concepts

[wychive]

𝙪𝙣𝙨𝙥𝙤𝙠𝙚𝙣 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙙𝙨

summary // you found your pile of ‘letters’ to hyunjin that contain thoughts that have never been said and decided to write to him one last time.

pairing(s) // hyunjin x gn!reader, hyunjin x oc, slight minho x reader

genre(s) // angst, letter fic 

warning(s) // mentions of food, themes of being forgotten, vulgar wording, humiliation, overthinking

word count // 2.0k

author's note // happy birthday @noya-sannnn​ !! im sorry this was so late hhh you know how i am irl,, but i hope you enjoy this! i love you so much, jane <3 i apologize for the many grammar mistakes gn. i recommend listening to iu’s ending scene while reading this! btw y/n/n means your nickname.

[10/01/14, 3:55am]

dear jinnie,

hi there! it's y/n <3 i hope you're doing okay - i mean of course you are pfft anyways, just writing this short letter (more like paragraph)  sort of as a venting mechanism? for things i cant tell you about lol  im not so sure how you would call it, since you're so much better at words than i am. basically were like:

hyunjin: ow a brain freeze!

me: haha brain go brrrr

anyways haha yea <3 it's 4am so like,, ill see you at school!

signed,

your loser,

y/n/n

[15/02/14, 12:34am]

yo heartthrob!

im back with this kinda stuff haha it's been a whole? week? since ive written one of these so like yes..hi! i just wanted to say thanks, for today. you really know how to cheer me up huh? you really outdid yourself by setting up that little picnic for us. congrats on making the strawberry cake so perfectly <3 this day will always stay as a core memory in the back of my brain. you're too caring sometimes,,, istg you'll pay for this [maybe hugs?] >:) 

signed,

your partner in crime,

y/n/n

[30/02/15, 01:29am]

jinnie-senpai~~

LMAO you hate me calling you that, doesn't change a thing though. hehe,, nways i hope you enjoyed your birthday present :) i got you that really cool skateboard that you wanted. i worked my ass off for that in my mother's garden so like,, you gotta thank me for that a thousand times :D nah jk, its a sincere gift, from me to you. i rarely do this for ANYONE so consider yourself lucky to have a best friend like me -3- also, seungmin is like….kinda the cutest person ever. introduce me to him pls, thank!

signed,

<your bestest friend3,

y/n

(p.s. you're kinda cute too,,,, ig,,, still stinkee tho)

[13/04/15, 9:04pm]

hey 'baby' (HAHAHA ihy for this)

i hope your day was okay! i didn't see much of you today (which was sort of a bummer but wtv) so like…. uh yea. you told me you were doing okay over text, which kinda surprised me because like?? we always video call lol this is kinda the first time,, but its okay, i trust you! (i really hope youre doing alright tho, i'll beat anyone up if they make you sad >:( ) you also called me 'sweetheart' today which was like…. omg wtf haha????????? that was so weird to me for some reason… a good kind of weird :D we haven't done those kinds of nicknames in a while so…. happy to know that they're back in session <3 i talked to the new girl today, she's really cool! like she knows the bean song on tiktok so like its a total win heh, ill introduce you to her tomorrow! you'll love her a lot

signed,

your 'lover',

y/n/n

[08/06/16, 10:23pm]

hey howl (hehe go back to that movie night we had)

this spring break sucks so much,, esp because youre not here (you still couldve brought me along :'[ ) but wtv i hope youre enjoying yourself. ive been hanging out with yeonnie lately and i found out she likes conan grey too like pls i love her sm. can we adopt her?? please???? she told me you guys have been video calling too and that makes me so happy!! you two are getting along so well aaa my precious babies </3 

what if you developed a crush on her? haha…..jk unless?? (no jk dont shes all mine, stay away >:) ) anyways, i hope the three of us hang out soon. maybe go to that ice cream parlour where they serve the best cookies and cream?  

signed,

your daisy,

y/n/n

[19/07/15, 01:23am]

peepee poopoo hello

heyheyhey!! (heh, haikyuu thingz) i hope youre doing okay! i mean sure you are, with everything going so well. also i feel like you're not telling me something. maybe it's just me? is it? i hope it is because you tell me everything,, we've been talking less these days but its okay! i know how busy you are, especially with your dad always bugging you,,

also, i think yeonbin likes you :0,, she keeps talking about you whenever we hang out. don't get me wrong, its not bad that she likes you but...something doesn't feel right. i feel like i'm being the third wheeler here and like ugh idk. haha laughs yea i think its just me.. im sorry, i didnt mean to do you like this,, anyways, ill see you soon + her too ofc- yall are inseparable lmao

signed,

your moonlight,

y/n/n

[23/07/15, 01:56am]

greetings, kind sir

lol more like mean sir but like aight KSKSK,, anyways,, how have you been? we haven't really talked in a while,, our convos are always so short with it being one-sided :/ i wish you were online more. yeonnie is ignoring me,, do you know why? i think you do,,, but when i asked you just said you didnt know. did i do something wrong? pls tell me.. 

she blocked my contact the other day and she won't even smile at me when i pass her in the hallways. its,, sad and stressful especially because she was the only one that would genuinely talk to me. i hate to say this,, but i miss you. us, hanging out like the best trio we are, yknow? but i dont think you miss me the same way. sorry, im getting out of hand. i know im just overreacting. im just gonna sleep ig,, good night! sweet dreams,,

signed,

your pink lemonade,

y/n/n

[25/07/15, 03:25am]

hi there

i heard you and her got together?? congrats, jinnie! im so proud of you,, especially because you never had even considered getting a girlfriend a few months earlier lmaO you really woo the ladies huh? anyways,, i hope you've been well since we last talked,, how many days has it been?? i would say nearly a week or so but honestly it feels like a hundred years,, considering you and i used to talk every day. but you have her now to keep you company.

keep this a secret but can you possibly tell me why it hurts when i see her? or when i mention her or even think of her?? is it because she's connected to you? but.. you're my best friend, so why? is it because i miss you? is it because im alone now? is it because you left me with a simple 'i have to go now,, bye y/n/n.'? im not sure either. im being silly, i apologize. ill figure it out sooner or later. sweet dreams, jinnie

signed,

your asswipe,

y/n

[25/07/15, 04:30am]

jinnie

it's because i love you. 

signed,

your butterfly,

y/n

[??/08/??, 05:??am]

you

i miss your lame jokes. i miss your smile. i miss your laughs. i miss your funny faces. i miss the way your eyes twinkle. i miss th way you would make me happy just by doing the bare minimum. i miss the disaster you made when cooking breakfast. i miss the night when you snuck me out just to go to that pretty lantern event. i miss when you would call out my name everytime we met. i miss when we would share earbuds in train rides. dont you get it, hyunjin? i miss you.

[??/??/15, ??:??am]

asshole.

please tell me that isn't true, please. you're too kind to do these kinds of things, right? + i was your best friend,, then, why, why did you hurt me like this. i didnt do anything wrong.. you couldve just told me you didnt like me,,, why did she have to tell me? out of all people. 

youre so pathetic for this,, i thought you were brave, bold - but youre just a fucking coward. i loved you, i really did. and i realised too late… im sorry. she,, i shouldn't have talked to her in the first place, right? i bet you knew she humiliated me, in front of everyone. of course you did, you were the only one that knew. you told her. fuck, i hate you so much (yet why do i long for you on a night like this?). you know how much that'll affect me and yet, there you are, laughing about it with her.

signed,

fuck off,

you know who i am.

[31/08/15, 03:41am]

ah, jinnie

please tell me this is just a nightmare. please, please. stop just reading my texts, please answer them. jinnie. i miss you so much. i dont care bout her, please just let me be in your arms. i dont care if you love me back, please just talk to me at least. tell me what i did wrong,, jinnie,, please,,, clear these tear stains on my cheek with kisses.

signed,

your fuck-up,

y/n

[15/09/15, 04:59am]

jinnie

why do i keep crying because of you? its been a few weeks since everything has happened. please, nothing has changed. i still love you the same even with all the hatred i have pent up in this stupid brain of mine. i wish i could just walk back in time, to where it all began.

when i first met you in third grade and you pushed me while playing soccer or maybe when we took those ridiculous prom pictures, remember those? i hope you still have them,, because i do too. i hope the pictures of us on your wall still hang there,, it'll remind you of the happy times. hm,, maybe you don't need them. 

you already have millions of pictures with you and her,, i bet you printed some and replaced those with ours right? sly dog. 

signed,

friend,

y/n/n

[04/02/16, 12:57am]

hey

i went to the park today and saw both of you being happy. it's nice to see your smile again. im sorry i didnt go up to you,, i just thought it would be awkward. when i heard that adorable laugh of yours, it made me realise that i lost something special. but it's okay isnt it? as your happiness matters more than mine. 

signed,

y/n

[06/01/20, 08:00pm]

dear hyunjin,

im doing fine here. how about you? gosh,, how long has it been? years? since we last talked to each other. i havent heard from you since. i would just like to say i still think of you sometimes, when watering the plants or dancing while making pancakes. sometimes i think you're here with me too, just being the pals we were. 

sometimes i'd see you out, just reading a book in the park or buying pasta sauce at the grocery store. it's nice to see you having a stable life. im not sure if you're still with her or not, but its good to know that you still have that large friend group. also! you're never gonna guess who im dating--

it's minho! do you remember him? the one that i used to hate,, uh yeah. he asked me out the other day- you may wonder how tf,,, i too do not know how tf but he gives the best hugs ever. he gave me the love i wanted from you. he stitched my heart back together after it broke,, i love him so much, jinnie..

it's snowing,, do you remember when we would skate on the frozen lake in front of your house? are your parents well? i wonder if your mother still has those earrings i bought for her birthday. i never told you this but your laugh and hers sound so similar. 

i would just like to say thank you, for everything. you were a big part of my life, up until now. when we see each other after this, we would just be strangers. maybe flash a little smile or give a little wave whenever we greet each other but nothing more. some memories of us would flow in every now and then but it'll just be a short teaser. well, i'll be going now. smile for me, okay?

signed,

the one that loved you the most,

y/n.

taglist // @/noya-sannnn, @crvgio​ , @neo-shitty​

reply to be in my gen taglist!

#kpop #kpop angst #kpop scenarios #kpop boy #stray kids #stray kids angst #stray kids x reader #stray kids scenarios #stray kids au #hwang hyunjin #hyunjin #hyunjin angst #hyunjin x reader #hyunjin x you #hyunjin x y/n #hyunjin scenarios #hyunjin fluff #ending scene #iu #alachi mind puke

[angstalottle]

Lana On The Case

Part 3

Lana knew she shouldn’t have been expecting much, especially after spending the last week lying in bed stewing in her own filth and misery.

That didn’t change the fact that her current appearance still shocked her.

Her skin had gained an ashen quality about it and dark circles under her eyes.

She was sure is Red hadn’t practically force fed her she was have lost much more weight then she already had.

She felt drained and heavy, like her life was sucked out from her when Hannah left her…

Keith showing up had given her a small glimmer of excitement perhaps even hope but as soon as he was gone and she was left alone to her thoughts they turned right back to the fact that her best friend was gone from her life forever.

That thought hurt even more than knowing her sweet wonderful Hannah killed people.

Job offer or not Lana likely would have spent the rest of her life lying in her bed if her aunties hadn’t decided to do something about it.

One moment she's dozing staring into space, the next Blue has pulled her covers away while Re dumped a bucket of warm soapy water over her.

The two manhandled her out of bed and into some clean clothes before giving her two options.

One was to stay cooped up inside and suffer through them inviting every nosey friend they could think of over to omard her with questions and pinched cheeks followed by of course the dreaded relationship advice that everyone over a certain age believed they knew.

Or go down to the police station and actually do something with her life/

Though neither option was particularly fun in the end Lana chose to go out mainly because Red had also made a swinging joke which of course practically sent her bolting through the door.

The police station like everything else in the village was only a short walk away from the Altea estate, you could get pretty much anywhere by cutting through the large gardens that have unfortunately fallen into a state of disrepair.

The lady of the manor had died when Lana was away and since then the place hadn’t been the same, like some of the beauty of the world left when she did.

As far as she knew the only daughter of the family Allura was away for school or something while her father worked in London.

Lana had fond memories of Allura, being a few years younger then the girl and quite a bit poorer, she always seemed like this fairy princess that could have anything or do anything.

Looks like not even princesses could escape tragedy.

Lana hiked up her skirt as she climbed over the thick mess of weeds and flowers careful not to disturb anything as she passed through.

Even if everyone took the shortcut it was an unsaid rule that you were not to disturb the gardens or ever go close to the house.

Of course when Lance got her foot caught in a bramble and fell face first into the ground she broke that rule by flattening at least a dozen flowers beneath her.

“Oh dear are you alright?” A woman wearing a veil and long white gloves asked as she hurried over from the main house.

Odd appearance aside what really caught Lana’s attention was her snow white hair. A characteristic that was common amongst the Altean family.

Going off her build she could have been anywhere between 20-30 but without the face or hands it really was impossible to tell.

Lana felt her cheeks burn as she pulled herself up and dusted herself down frowning at the rip that now worked its way up her blue skirt.

The woman put her hands on her dress and examined the rip tutting softly “we really must get the gardener back in this place really has fallen to ruin.”

Now that she was closer Lana could smell the sweet scent of roses coming off her in such a large volume it would almost be suffocating if they weren't outside.

“Do you work here?” Lana asked trying to swallow her embarrassment while this strange woman kept hold of her skirt.

One strong breeze and she would see next weeks washing.

The woman chuckled “not exactly. I used to live here I never actually planned on returning but in light of my father's disappearance I suppose I didn’t have much choice.”

Lana couldn’t help but flinch, since what Hannah did came to light any case of men running off in the middle of the night or simply not returning after a day out is now considered suspect.

Their still digging up all the bodies and people have been flocking from all over in search of their missing husbands, fathers and brothers.

Lana then realised something very important.

Mainly that if Alfor was missing and this woman was his daughter then it must have been Allura!

“Allura?”

Lana couldn’t see her face but she imagined a smile on those pretty pink painted lips she used to know very well.

“That’s me, im sorry but who are you?”

Lana had her suspicions of course that this was all a scam, someone swooping in to steal the Altean family fortune, but she wasn’t really in the mood for any other mysteries right now.

That and according to Keith she was pretty forgettable.

“Oh im Lana… I used to play with you in the garden as a kid.”

“Oh my i'm so sorry Lana, im afraid my memory hasn’t been that good since the accident. She gestured to her veil and gloves “I got caught up in the Blitz and i'm afraid my appearance paid a higher price then by mind.”

Lana felt guilt crawl into her stomach, well at least she didn’t outright accuse  her of being a con artist. Besides Coran was a dear friend of the family, there's no way someone would be able to just take over Allura’s life without him noticing.

“Im sorry, I didn’t realise.”

Allura waved her off finally letting go of her skirt “don’t worry about it, ive made my peace with my situation, it is a tad lonely though, people aren't exactly eager to visit the manor these days.” She sounded so sincerely sad that Lana couldn’t help but feel for her.

She knew what it was like to lose everything because of a situation out of her control, the war had stolen many things from them, Lana was lucky to keep her beauty at least.

“Well then I suppose I have no choice but to come round for tea, I would invite you to my aunts cottage but they tend to get too excited around anyone they used to know.”

Lana gave her the best smile she could manage and was rewarded by Allura taking her hands and kissing them.

Once again her face turned an interesting shade of red.

“That sounds simply wonderful Lana, how about Thursday at 8 o'clock?”

Lana had lost her ability to form words so simply nodded earning her a small chuckle in response.

“I don’t want to keep you if your busy so ill just see you Thursday?” Allura asked startling Lana out of her stupor.

“Yes I should go, but i'll erm see you then I promise.”

Lana stuttered deciding it was best to continue on her way before she made an even bigger fool of herself so mustered up what grace she had to give an awkward curtsy realising that was dumb halfway through and instead turned and hurried on her way hitting herself muttering “stupid stupid stupid” over and over again until she finally arrived at the police station.

As expected of a small town the police station was fairly quiet this time of day home only to the drunks that were picked up the night before and only now being released to go back to their family or in some cases the church.

Of course one would expect it to be much busier with the number of bodies being dug up but unfortunately since Hannah left and it became national news the investigation had been taken over by some fancy out of state law enforcement that walk around in nice suits and a stuck up attitude to match their overall pompous appearance.

Going off the sour atmosphere in the station no one was too pleased to have the villages first ever big case stolen from under them.

Lana did her best to smile politely as she made her way to reception preparing herself for awkward small talk with someone she really hoped wouldn't recognise her.

“Hello im here-”

“If you got a crime to report fill out the form if not get lost.”

The woman behind the desk looked too young to be working, her slight frame and big doe eyes making her seem like she couldn't be much older than 15 but then again looks can be deceiving. Like the fact that despite wearing big round glasses and squinting at a book in front of her the glass within the frame appeared to be purely decorative and not actually serve any function.

Lana cleared her throat “no actually i'm here about the job. Im expected.”

This time she at least bothered to look up from her book and glanced Lana up and down “what they replacing me with some tramp, i've worked here ten years and they bring in some totty to take my job”

Lana quickly held up her hands feeling actually pretty threatened by this tiny angry lady “no! No i'm the new consultant im supposed to be working with Keith and-”

“Oi Keith! Some broad here says shes your new partner!” She yelled and just like that, all eyes were on her.

Lana smiled awkwardly at them really wishing a hole would appear beneath her and swallow her up whole so she could escape this situation.

However the only thing the universe sent her was a very flustered keith running in from the back.

He was carrying a stack of papers and had that god awful mullet tied back in a ponytail that honestly didn't look half bad on him.

“Thanks Katie i can take her from here.” Keith dropped the papers on her desk “Also Griffin needs you to file these for him.”

“He could do it himself” Katie grumbled grabbing the papers and flicking through them “he didn't even bother filling some of these out!”

Keith quietly grabbed Lana’s arm and pulled her towards him as Katie got distracted with her angry mutterings “Sorry about her, she's just pissed that her dad lost his job to a hot shot whos dad just happens to be a governor.”

“Ah where would be be without nepotism” Lana chuckled letting Keith led her back into a small office where five other people were sat. She assumed the cells were behind one of the closed doors and perhaps the archive room behind another.

It had been a long time since she had been back here, it was certainly before the war was even a possibility and she had broken the wrong persons window and ended up having to wait for her mother by Corans desk.

People tend to say that places from your youth always seem so much smaller when you visit them again. Until now Lana wasn't really sure she bought into that nostalgia fueled nonsense.

But seeing the row of chairs her feet used to dangel off while she prepared an excuse for her behaviour for her furious mother now looked like they would fall apart if she just got too close let alone sat on one.

At least not all the changes were bad. Coran really did deserve that nice office and the title Detective neatly painted above his name.

“You know I was starting to think you wouldn't be coming” Keith said as they came to what Lana assumed was his desk. It was a little away from the others and scattered with paper work in various states of finished. It lacked much personality beyond a couple of knives and oh boy keith standing next to an incredibly attractive man that Lana realised fairly quickly must have been his older brother.

“To be honest i wasn't sure either, my life kinda went to hell but Aunt Blue and Red practically shoved me out of the door.”

Keith chuckled in response as her perched on the edge of his desk “that sounds about right. Though I hate to say it but you've kind of come on boring day. Everyones so desperate for something to do that their even taking the grunt work from me.”

“So what your just sitting around all day?” Lana asked right as a hand collided with her behind.

Lana likes to think herself an understanding woman. Or at least she tries to ever since the instadent where what she thought was a gropper on a train turned out to be a blind man having dropped his cain. So rather then turning around and grabbing the arm of whoever just did that to break over her knee she calmly turned to them.

She came face to face with a tall man that she unfortunately recognised.

James Griffin top of the class when they went to school together and by far the most arrogant man she ever met. And that was before he got a cushy job thanks to his dad.

Lana glared up at him giving him a chance to apologize or say he had mistaken her for his girlfriend that was into that kind of thing.

Instead he just smirked “wow Keith how did you find yourself this hot piece of ass.”

Ok she was going to break his nose now.

Unfortunately before she got the chance keith stepped in front of her “don't talk to her like that Griffin, Coran hired her himself as a consultant and i'm sure he wouldn't take that kind of behaviour.’

James rolled his eyes but did visibly tense as he shot a glance at the closed office door. “Whatever. This whole thing is just for press, whoever heard of a woman police officer. Their far too emotional.”

“Last I checked you were the one that cried when i kicked you in the nuts as kids.” Lana huffed crossing her arms.

“Ah buck teeth Lana! My my you did fill out nicely. How about after work I take you out?” Jame smiled looking her up and down in a way that made her skin crawl.

“How about I tell your mother that you slap my ass, if i remember right she was a reasonable woman.”

Oh how quickly his attitude changed. He swallowed whatever response he had ready and scurried off to his office next to Corans.

“What a creep.”

“Yeah but a rich one.” Keith sighed “you ok?”

“Yeah just kinda pissed i didn't get to make that jerk squeal like in highschool.” Lana noticed a small smirk appear at the corner of keiths lips at that and decided to take it as a win even if she could still feel his disgusting hand on her.

Unfortunately the next few hours were not as exciting.

Lana pulled up a chair across from Keith and kept herself busy by flicking pieces of paper at him, an activity that he avoided joining in with for exactly ten minutes.

They were so wrapped up in their game that they didn't notice coran standing next to the desk until after Keith made the winning shot and jumped up to let out a victory cry.

“It's nice to see you've found a way to keep miss Mclain here entertained during our slow day.” Coran chuckled as Keith startled and quickly cleared his throat trying to hide the blush quickly creeping up his face.

“Detective i can explain”

Coran held his hand up quickly cutting him off “no need, I understand the importance of a bit of fun to avoid dying of boredom. The time for that has now sadly passed im sending you to look into a missing persons cases.”

Keith and lana exchanged a look, while lana’s was excitement Keiths was confusion.

“Sir while im happy for a case why not give it to someone else? Im sure all the others would kill for a case right now.”

Coran simply chuckled to himself handing over a case file “because Kogane your the only officer here I trust not to get side tracked while investigating. That and i'm sure Lana here will make sure your eyes don't wander too far.”

Lana wasn't really sure what he meant by that until they got to the scene of the crime.

Or as everyone else calls it the ‘Galra Gentlemens Club’.

When the club first opened it was met with outcry from the church and the school boards and well anyone with too much time on their hands.

Now after being open for more than a decade, those same people have become the most lucrative clientele, who know stuck up prudes could have such deep pockets for the sinful arts.

Keith had kindly offered to give Lana a ride on the handlebars of his bike since the club was located uphill from the station and there was no way the poor old police car would make it up the whole way. Apparently a replacement was on its way but they had been promising it since before the war.

Lana had of course told Keith that while she appreciate the offer she would find the very idea outlandishly improper, so of course made him ride the handle bars while she put her years of missing the bus and not wanting to be late training to good use.

After a quick check with her compact and a nod to Keith they entered the club.

Lana was no stranger to Gentlemens clubs, she had been to more than a few during the war to meet with people who were usually a lot more willing to give up information when they had a few drinks in them.

This club was no different, everything was a sickening deep purple as if the colour alone could make it classy or hide the disturbingly prominent wet patches on the couches.

Lana tried her very best not to stare at the men already here this early on a weekday morning and instead focused on following Keith back to see the manger.

“Just let me do the talking, guys like this aren't always that nice to women” Keith whispered as he knocked on the door and it swung open to not show a greasy man but instead a very tall muscular woman with short black hair wearing a suit.

Lana felt her mouth go dry just looking at her.

“A-are you the manager here?” Keith asked clearly feeling equally intimidated and aroused as Lana was.

“Yeah i am, who wants to know?” She asked leaning against the doorway and looking down at him. Her gaze however moved quickly from keith to Lana and a smile spread across her face.

“Usually we don't hire new talent outside of auditions but for  a beautiful girl like you im willing to make an exception.”

“I” Lana squeaked finding herself speechless for the first time in a long time.

Thankfully Keith came to her rescue before she could actually contemplate working for this greek god of a woman.

“Actually we came from the police station. You called about one of the dancers going missing?”

The woman nodded and stepped back into the room hurrying them inside before closing the door.

“Yeah my best girl Ezor, she was seen leaving the club last week but no one has seen her since.”

“Does she often disappear like this? Perhaps to visit a gentleman caller miss...?” Keith asked pulling out a notebook while Lana looked around the office.

“Zethrid…. And trust me she's not the sorts to make house calls.”

It was fairly empty save for a punching bag in the corner and a few pictures on the walls. Most of them were group shots of all the dancers in costumes. But those actually on the desk seemed only to contain Zethrid and a slim woman with pink hair tied in a high ponytail. It was just the two of them over and over again smiling like they didn't have a care in the world.

“Is this Ezor here?” Lana asked picking up one picture showing the two in the park, judging from the bunting and celebrating in the background it was the day the allie ‘won’ the war.

Zethrid nodded “yeah that's her… we actually live together and yeah she disappears sometimes but never for this long and never without contacting me.”

“Is it possible she ran off with a sweetheart?” Keith asked taking the picture.

“She wouldn't. I know she's been taken its the only explanation.”

Something told Lana that this relationship was deeper than friendship “The last night she was seen, was there anything unusual happening?”

Zethrid thought for a moment “now that you mention it there was a black car parked outside the club all day. I didn't give it much mind incase it was a customer trying to work up the nerve to come in but it left right after she did.”

“Did you happen to catch the plates?” Keith asked hopefully only to let out a disappointed sigh when she shook her head no.

“But the car was old looking with a dent in the drivers side door.”

Keith noted it down “thanks we will be in touch.”

He led the way out but Zethrid grabbed Lana by the arm before she could leave “please i can't imagine life without her… she's my best friend.”

Lana knew what it was like to lose one of those. So she smiled and put a hand over hers “I promise ill do everything I can to find her.”

Once they were safely outside keith let out a groan “you should promise people anything, it just means you'll get attached to the case.”

“Isn't that the job of a detective though? How can i love a case if i don't care about it?” Lana huffed hitching up her skirt and getting on the bike.

“I'm just saying that it will end up hurting you more if we find her dead in a ditch somewhere.”

Lana rolled her eyes “ever the optimist huh Mullet. Besides we have a lead how many people in town have old black cars?”

“Excluding the police cruiser i'd say seven.” Keith noticed the sceptical look Lana was giving him and rolled his eyes.

“My brother owns the mechanics remember, i help out sometimes and not many people really have cars round here.”

Lana sighed “maybe we should get a second opinion from your dreamy brother.” she batted her eyelashes playfully at him as he climbed onto the handle bars.

“Shut up and pedal we've got a lot of groundwork to do.”

Five hours!

It took five hours to find all the cars, to check for dents and alibis.

In that time Lana fell into two ditches, got attacked by a chicken and the rip in her dress traveled up to past her knee.

As her mother would say she's only some red lipstick away from looking like a whore.

Lana wished she could say that time was well spent and while watching Keith getting chased by an angry family of pigeons that had taken resident in one of the old cars they ultimately ended up on a dead end.

So while the light began to fade and the two slowly walked up to the station the mood was sour.

“It could always have been someone from out of town?” Lana suggested holding the split in her dress to try and keep it from travelling any higher.

“No they would have been too noticeable. If someone from out of town drove through here everyone would know about it by now. We must have missed something.”

Lana shivered in the cool air and was surprised when Keith handed over his jacket without taking his eyes off the path.

The red really did suit him better but the warmth from his body made her feel better.

“We should check surrounding houses tomorrow, maybe one of the cars was taken without the owner realising.”

“And what they dented it and then undented it?’ Keith snorted “no if the dent was fixed it would have had to come through the shop. Shiro may be able to help.”

“I'll try to hide my disappointment” Lana laughed earning her a playful push from Keith which she returned.

The two were laughing and having a moment of fun that when cold hard reality finally came crashing down Lana felt like she had been punched in the face.

Just as they walked in the car they were looking for pulled in behind them.

Old, black and with a large dent on the side.

The only problem was that it was Coran driving it.

#langst #fem lance #1940s detective au #klance #allurance #pidge #Coran #james griffin

[ecessive-dreamer]

Title.

​He sees her passing, bags of chanel in each hand, yet her head is still wrapped in a book as she walks, glancing up to the street every two minutes. He froze when he thought she saw him, walking straight toward him. Her head was still in the books, “Oh my, I’m so sorry” Luna says as she bumps with him head to head,her book landing flat on the ground.

Luna mutters,“Donovan?”

he takes a deep breath, she looks so beautiful, her skin as pale as winter snow, almond green eyes,and black luscious hair. Recounting every moment spent with her, tracing the outline of her lips, memorizing her face, and yet here she is standing in front of me and i'm still in awe of her.

“what are you doing here?” i ask her as nonchalant as possible while i pick up the bags that landed on the floor.

“Oh you know how i am on weekend sales..wow i haven't seen you in ages” she says as she eyes him, looking at his slightly crooked nose, ocean blue eyes and disheveled dirty blonde hair. Same old Donovan she thought.

“Well yeah of course how could i forget” I say as she turns away, blushing. Recounting just like him all the days they would walk hand in hand, at each and every single store and just like that the sharp pain returns, and the haunting memories come back. He destroyed her. It's been five years, but five years isn't enough. She manages to grab all her bags, as he hands her the book.

“Ah, you still read british literature huh? I guess some things don't change” I say. Her smile fades as fast as it appeared. I look at her with such intensity in my eyes

“My reason for life. Not living, but life. That was the touch. And she was his reason for life, and why he must survive” her breath catches

“ I’m sorry i have to go.”

“Luna, wait. It's from your book, atonement!” I yell as she crosses the street, away from him. He takes out the pack of cigarette that's been itching to be smoked all day. She brings that out of him, after all this time, seeing her face, smelling her scent, hearing her voice. He needed her again, and he was going to have her.

*Beep beep beep* i roll over my bed, it's 5:00a.m. i sit up “shit” as my feet hit the cold wooden floor. I forgot to turn on the heater last night. I put on my socks and roll on my hoodie as I walk to the thermostat and turn it from 50 to 70 in my small studio apartment. I walk to the kitchen and start my routine. I turn on my coffee while simultaneously brush my teeth. I hop in the shower as my coffee is getting ready. As soon as I stepped out of the shower I wipe away the fog on the mirror and look at myself. Ive lived here for years and still haven’t made any progress. Still the same apartment same job same remorse. Hell even the same coffee, as I realize the coffee is still on and rush to my kitchen. Pour a cup, black. I put my work clothes on and head out the door with my coffee.

​It gets me everytime, everytime I walk out of the front door of my building that im actually living in new York city. I cant imagine anywhere else I want to be. Way better than my town back home. Yeah sure I miss my family and what not but being on my own is what ive always wanted. I walk my 6 blocks to work thinking about yesterday; I actually saw her. Its been months of almost nothing. The only time ive seen her was in pictures and memories that would be occasionally sparked by an object that reminded me of her.

​I walked into the building of my job. I do journalism for a small time newspaper company. Same job for 7 months and still no raise. Its nothing to complain about I make enough for me to live comfortable but yet I still feel like my time is more valuable.

As I make it to the 4th floor, my floor my boss is always the first to greet me as his office is right by the elevator door. “morning don” he says, “morning murphy, hows it going this morning” I return. He replies with a big sigh, “ sales haven’t been so well so its causing us to do alittle remodling of who we have here.” “oh?’ I replied with a nervous voice hoping I wasn’t being given the talk about being let go. He laughs “don you have nothing to worry about, though im glad I keep you on your toes this early in the morning.” “I need you to show around the new intern, shes a possibility at a new columnist here and I want you to take close attention to her to see if she is going to be an asset to this company”, he asks. I reply with a uncertain tone,” I don’t know murphy I have this article ive been working on and I don’t know if I can afford the extra baggage.” He replied to me with a stern face,” it wasn’t a question” and as soon as I noticed his face I quickly replied with a smile on my face “no problem boss.” He looks back with a artificial smile on his face,” great shes in your office. Her name is tiffiany. You know like the diamond.”

I walk to my office which is completely on the opposite side of the floor. As I walk into my office I knock on the door. She turns and looks at me with a grin. The first thing I notice was he hair. Golden not like a dumb blonde kind of look but almost a los angles kind of blonde where he hair is almost as bright as the sun. she was short but not to short maybe around 5’3 which is short for my abnormally tall figure. I reach my hand out to greet her as she does the same. “hi im tiffany. Ive heard allot about you.” As my hand meets her hand I realize how soft her skin is which causes me to gently squeeze her hand. “heeee” I reply. She looks back at me with a puzzled face. I have no idea why words wouldn’t come out of my mouth.“ hi im Donovan but you can call me don. Im sorry for coming across as an idiot I have no idea why my mouth wouldn’t work.” She laughed, “its okay I have that affect on people sometimes” she said with a joking tone. I grin” wow a since of humor that’s something your gonna lose working here” she laughed. Her laugh was cute. “so im gonna be working with you?” I asked her. “yeah I guess your stuck with me but its only a month so your gonna have to bare with me.” “a month? Oh no I don’t know if im going to be able to do it” I said. Her smile went away. “oh im sorry I just was joking” I said. She started to laugh, “ wow cute and sensitive, maybe ill have to stay longer than a month.” We both looked at eachother and smiled knowing that there would be no problem working together.

After a week of work I head home on a Saturday night. On my walk home I get a call from my buddy david I haven’t spoke to him in weeks hes been busy with his schooling. “hey man whats up?” saying answering the phone. “hey you still live on the upper east side right?” he asks. “yeah” I reply “well im in town and wondering if you wanted to get some drinks or something?” he asks. “hell yeah, where at?” I ask him. “meet me a napoleons bar? Ill order you a beer” he says. “alright man see you in a few” i say as I hang up the phone.

I walk into napoleons and see dave. He raises his beer up to get my attention. I walk over and we embrace eachother in a hug. “whats going on man” he asks. “same shit just a Saturday” I reply. He laughs, I ask him the same “ whats going on man”. “well for starters im a month away from graduation” he says. “congrats man im proud of you, next round is on me” I tell him in an exciting voice.

Weve been sitting catching up for hours and have had enough beer and bar food for me to be sick for months. He asks,” hey man I know it’s a touchy subject but what ever happened with you and luna?” I look and reply with the most honest answer I could think of,” things just didn’t work out. He looks at me and says,” he man that’s too bad I know you really liked the girl but shit happens, hell look at me im not even done with college and already divorced.” I look at him and he looks at me and we both laugh, “yeah but I started working with this new girl and I don’t know I shes kind of funny” I tell him. “oh yeah? Tell me about her” he asks. I tell him ”well shes kind of an asshole but she has a sence of humor, she has nice hair and big blue eyes. Hell she can even write too.” “you like her?” he asks. “ no man I just work with her” I say. He looks at me with a face that says “really?” he says “ come on man you wouldn’t have brought her up if you didn’t ask her out man” he does have a point but im not sure maybe I just need to focus on work plus I don’t think im quite sure for anything yet. The conversation dies down after a couple more beers and we both say our farewells and part ways.

Its Monday all over again. I wake up make the coffee take a shower but something is urging me. Im actually excited to go to work. Im putting on clothes that give me confidence. I leave out of my apartment and make it to work 15 min early. I walk past murphys office saying ,”morning boss.” He replies with “good morning” but I walk past him and am almost on a mission to my office. “hey don” she says, I reply “ good morning tiff.” She looked great this morning. I don’t know what it was about her. The way she smelled the way her hair was tied up in a bun or maybe it was just the way her hair shined back at me as the new York gloomy day approached. “hey tiff?” I ask. She replys with a speedly “yes?” “ would you want to go out with me sometime?” she looks at me with a puzzled face. I realize what I just asked and I say “ im sorry im not sure what came over me. I don’t know its just a new week and” she cuts me off in the middle of my rant, “what time would you like to pick me up?” I look in shock, surpisingly I got this far. “um after work maybe we could grab a bite to eat?” I ask“ id love that” she replies.

After the work day we both leave together and I take her to this little Italian place a couple blocks from work. All I can think to myself is how well it went. How well it was kept going. After dinner I called a cab for her and payed him to take her to her house. Before she got in the cab she kissed me. Just a peck, I was caught almost by surprise. She says “ thank you I loved tonight and hope it can happen again” I replied “ me too, and id love too. Was that you asking me out?” she laughs “ yes but you cant tell anybody” she gets into the cab and we both say goodnight.

I walk into my office. Its tiffs last day, but I have a pitt in my stomach cause im not quite sure where this leaves us. Her and I have been going out more frequently and it seems to get more serious. Im not sure what to think of all of it but I guess I might just have to find out. I get out of the elevator and walk to my office. Tiff turns around and sees me, “hey hun she runs up and hugs me, you know what today is right?” of course how could I forget” I reply as I walk past her and sit on my desk. “hey? You okay?” she asks. I respond shrugging my shoulders “ yeah im alright” she sees the worry in my eyes. “is this about us?” she asks me. I look at her as she looks at me. “yes it is” she says. “talk to me” she says. I look at her “ what are we going to do? Like tiff honestly I have feelings for you and im not quite sure how were going to go with you leaving” she looks at me and smiles “ hun just because im leaving this job doesn’t mean I plan on leaving anywhere out of your life” I look back at her and smile as she looks at me. She walks over and sits on my lap and says “ lets go out tonight and celebrate, a new chapter of things”. I smile “ I have to decline I have to finish this article for tomorrows paper but ill tell you what, tomorrow night sounds excellent. Only if your free?” she looks at me and says “of course im free, sounds like a plan”.

I get off of work late, its raining. I look at the time and its almost 1am. I start my walk home. On my walk home I cant think about how much im grateful for how things are turning out in my life. I mean hey just a couple months ago I felt like I had no direction in life but now I feel like I might be moving forward. I

I walk into my apartment with my soaking coat and hang it up on the hook. I turn my heater up and start to change into my sleep wear. Right as I hit my bed I hear a knock on my door. “ who could be here this late?” I think to myself. I walk to my door peep hole and peer through all I see is a women with her hood up. I open the door and as soon as I opened it I can feel me stomach in my shoes. “luna?” I say in a muttered voice. “hi Donny” she replies. “what are you doing here?” I ask. She looks at me “I was out and just happened to stop by I figured you would still be up. The late sleeper I remember you as” She says to me. “yeah I just got off work and was getting ready to hit the sack” I tell her “ oh im sorry I was just looking for someone to talk to I can go if youd like.” She responds. “ no come in ill make some coffee” I respond. She comes in and sits down I stand in the kitchen and start to make coffee. “Nothing has changed about this place huh?” she says over the coffee being brewed. “nope not much, I barely spend time in here anymore” I tell her. She looks in a surprised look,” oh out with your girlfriend all the time?” she said in a sarcastic but serious manner. “actually yes well I mean you could call it that, and work” I told her. “oh?” she says,”hows work going?” I knew she was beating around the bush but who was I to call it out. “ works great actually ive been moving up in the chain and really enjoying my work” I told her. “enjoying work who are you? Is this even Donovan?” she says in a joking way. I laugh as I hand her the coffe,”yeah you can say I guess im moving in some kind of direction but who knows if its right or wrong.” She laughs,” and there he is Same old downer Donny I remember.” She says laughing. “how about you, whats miss luna doing with her life?” I ask. “well ive finally become a published writer and im actually on my way to getting my doctorate in british literature.” She tells me in such detail but I start to unvoluntarely ignore as I start to get lost in her brown eyes. We continue catching up throughout coffee and end up staying up all night.

My alarm for 6 am goes off and I realize that I have work. As I go to turn it off I walk back into the room and lune is standing by the sink rinsing her cup. I cant help but remember every morning waking up and seeing her standing there making our coffee in on of my oversized shirts of mine. After all this was our first place. I look at her the way I used to look at her and she turns back and looks at me. I walk to her and she walks towards me and there seems to almost be a silence in the city of new York. All I can pay attention to is her. We walk so close to eachother that I can feel her breathe on my neck. We both move in slowly and interlock lips. We kiss, for the first time in almost a year of not talking and it feels like the first time I ever layed my lips on hers. It felt like nothing else mattered. Like everything was oblivious to this moment. We move to the bedroom and without a word being said our clothes seem to disappear and both move slowly into the bed that we picked out together. Everything became nothing and nothing became everything. The way she looked at me was the way I was staring at her. A year soon collapsed into nothing. Hours felt like minutes and the day soon fell to night.

The next day I woke up and she was laying on my arm. I had this overwhelming guilt. It clouded over me. I notice my phone on the table. I pick it up and have new messages. They are from tiff,” hey haven’t heard from you all day. Hope your okay? Lemme know about dinner.” I hit my hand to my face “shit I had dinner with her last night and I missed it” I thought to myself. Im sitting on my couch and feel a hand reach over my shoulder to my chest and kiss my neck. “goodmorning” luna said. I stand up and look at her breathing heavily. “ why?” I ask her. She looks at me with a questioned face. “why does everytime I feel like things are moving in a direction that I like I take 10 steps back with you” I tell her. She looks at me “Donny I miss you” she says. “you didn’t miss me. You didn’t miss me when I saw you in the street and ran away from me. You didn’t miss me when I woke up one morning and you were gone for reasons I still don’t know. Why did you have to come back?” I yell. She looks at me with a tear rolling down her face and says “im gonna go” I immediately realize what I say and regret every word that came out of my mouth. Its too late to take it back I know who luna is and she wont forget that ever. I stand back as I watch her leave for the last time. As she walks out of the door I fall to the ground in tears realizing that the only person ive truly loved I pushed away.

Tiffinay and I are moving all of my stuff from one apartment to our next. Its been 6 months since she left and tiff still doesn’t know she exsists. As im finishing cleaning out my bedroom I notice a book laying in my drawer in my room im never seen before. Theres a sticker on it that says “for you, love luna.” I look at the book and realize there is a writing on the inside that says “our story.” I turn back and take one final look at the apartment as I close the door to that chapter of my life.

[nanshe-of-nina]

People of the Edwardian phase of the Hundred Years War as dril tweets

Philippe VI de France: Time and time Again. People on here Fuck me over and ruin my life. simply for starting the Dialouge.

Edward III of England: thinking of wrapping my entire body in barbed wire and becoming Sovereign.

Jehan II de France: a teen approached me at the food court and said “I see you wore your clown costume today” and i spent the next 9 hours processing the insult.

Jehanne de Bourgogne: CHILD: Papa.. tell me once more about WIFE’s DUTY. PAPA: it is WIFE’s DUTY to protect her husband from villains, always.

Jitka Lucemburská: Damn. the MomTown forums just started requiring 4 point Mom Verificaiton to be able to post there for some reason..anyone got a work around?

Philippa de Hainaut: my opinion on politics: my opinion on politics is that politidcs is extremely good, but sometimes it is bad.

Ludwig IV, Holy Roman Emperor: bigmouth fake priest telling me to “drink a shitload of holy water and kill yourself” as penance? this has happened at three churches now.

Pope Benedict XII: it is with a heavy heart that i must announce that the celebs are at it again.

Jehan III, duc de Bretagne: i just left an enormous pile of vomit behind golds gym for all of you abominable pig clowns to pick at #blackfridaydeals

Robert III d’Artois: (in really quiet, barely audible voice) hope your dick falls of bitch.

Hugues Quiéret: currently employed as Water Guru at the beach. it’s sort of like being a lifeguard except i have no inclination to touch the drowning people.

Geoffroy d’Harcourt: OH im so Fucking sorry “Your Majesty”, i didnt realize that dick rings were banished in this dystopian piss earth. Ur probably a 9gag poster.

Jacob van Artevelde: (in highly rational and cool voice) i have the higher follower count than them. i wiont let them undermine me.

Pope Clement VI: may the wind carry my tweets and soothte the sick, the wounded, the downtrodden of both man & beast, across the savage shit earth of trolls,

Jehanne de Valois, comtesse de Hainaut: startling how im the only person on this site with an actual human soul. you would think the other guys on here have one, but no.

Eudes IV, duc de Bourgogne: myth: making me mad is cool FACT: making me mad is a crap move& people who do it are all sociopathivc criminals with fucked up rotten brains.

Jehan de Montfort: turning my headlights off when driving at night,.. so that my Rivals cannot see me.

Jehanne de Flandre: i just want to find the optimal bra for sniper operations, but everoyne here is so rude, and pieces of shit.

Johann der Blinde of Bohemia: Q: If your post was proven by a counsil of wise men to be racist, or bullshit, would you bar it from the record? A: I do not delete my posts.

Charles II, comte d’Alençon: ((SPILLING BLOOD ALL OVER KEYBOARD) THIS IS WHAT U WANT. THIS IS WHAT U FUCKING BASTARDS WANT RIGHT (1 WEEK LATER) WHY ARE THE KEYS STICKING

Jehanne de Clisson: as far as im concerned the best revenge is ordering wolf piss online & pouring it into soneones car. “living well” is too hard.

Arnaud de Cervole: i will raze every forest and devour each city in blood tribute for the crime of 9/11!! please nbring back blue collar TV

Frank Hennequin: the jduge orders me to take off my anonymous v mask & im wearing the joker makeup underneath it. everyone in the courtroom groans at my shit.

William Montagu, 1st Earl of Salisbury: im at the point in my life where i cant relate to any popular fictional characters unless they use massive amounts of hair gel and steriods.

Antonio Doria: my name is Destyn. i build crossbows and sell weed to all your dads and im 15.

Gautier VI de Brienne: MYTH: my posts are for the Pauper REALITY: my posts are for the Prince.

Étienne Marcel: looked at a newspaper today. looks like we’re getting taxed out the wazoo, with this president. anyone else see this shit? tax out the wazoo.

Guillaume Cale: “FEAR IS USED 2 ENSLAVE THE MASSES,” I SAID AS I RIPPED THE FUCKIN DECORATIVE CARDBOARD SKELETON OFF OF THE COMMUNITY CENTERS BULLETIN BOARD

Edward Montagu, 1st Baron Montagu: girls always love to telling people not to“ Mansplain” but they do not care of, “Man's Pain”

Louis Iᵉʳ, comte de Flandre: 1) i do not owe you mother fuckers a damn thing 2) i will not hear any more questions or comments unless they pertain to MetroPCS, or Pepsi.

Philippe III de Navarre: the crusaders fire ballistas into my throbbing diaper- unlesashing a torrent of mustard yellow shit and poisoning the entire village.

Gaston II, comte de Foix: i am going to plunge a sword into our bed and officially end outr 40 yr marriage if you do not stop yelling while i am recording my stream’s.

Henry de Grosmont, 1st Duke of Lancaster: please help my cousin “Bruno_THought_Leader” who just had his account suspended for threatening to “Fuck” brexit.

Robert Le Coq, Bishop of Laon: i have absolutely zero interest in friendship, i have absolutely zero interest in jokes, i am simply here to collect data and earn respect.

Jehan Iᵉʳ, comte d’Armagnac: the joke is on you fuck face. i actually love getting screamed at and publicly shamed for my dumb-assed bull shit . I love apologizing.

Bardi and Peruzzi families: boy oh boy do i love purchasing large amounnts of Fool’s Gold. wait a minute... fools gold fucking sucks. this stuff is no good..!! Fuck !!!

Jehanne II de Navarre: i regret being tasked the emotional burden of maintaining the final bastion of morality and NIce manners in this endless ocean of human SHIT.

William de Bohun, 1st Earl of Northampton: if you have less than 1000 followers i can guarantee you that me and the boys share your posts in vip chat rooms and call you a "Muthafucka”.

William de la Pole: thinking about getting the dow jones back on track, simply by making a few phonecalls. but certain people have been a bitch to me, so i wont.

Thomas de Beauchamp, 11th Earl of Warwick: shutting computer down until the shitty moods & attitudes can fuck off., if you need me ill be on my other computer, sititng 60° to my right.

Thomas Holland, 1st Earl of Kent: ive heard from a reliable source that people arre putting their lips on to my girl friends avatars and going “muah muah muah.” cut it out.

Raoul II de Brienne, comte d’Eu: hate it when my boss knocks out the front leg of my desk with a baseball bat and funko pop lego shit flies every where.

Karel IV, Holy Roman Emperor: “RESULT You are the Serpant. YOu dislike loud places and people are constantly putting drama in your life. But you’re strong.” This is true.

Charles de Blois-Châtillon: torturing my damn dick with corn cob holders in Penance for the foul tone i took with the subway corporation today.

Jehanne de Penthièvre: i help every body, im not racist, i keep myself nice, and when i ask for a single re-tweet in return i am told to fuck off, fuck myself, etc.

Jacques Iᵉʳ de Bourbon, comte de La Marche: “ah boo hoo hoo i want to post Foul comments to content leaders” Fat Chance, Dimwit. I will annihilate you under bulwark of the Law and God.

John Chandos: DOCTOR: you cant keep doing this to yourself. being The Last True Good Boy online will destroy you. you must stop posting with honor ME: No,

Jehan d’Artos, comte d’Eu: , who had gone missing for 17 years and was presumed dead after failing to return from his ultimate dumpster diving life quest

William Douglas, 1st Earl of Douglas: i get emails. i get emails saying the trolls have won, and that i should bow to them, since i have lost the battle. to this i say FAT-CHANCE.

David II of Scotland: “jail isnt real,” i assure myself as i close my eyes and ram the hallmark gift shop with my shitty bronco.

Charles de La Cerda: i think that turning myself Gay in the summer of 2013 would really impress my overseas investors.

William de Montagu, 2nd Earl of Salisbury: my watch beeps whwich means its time to stand in front of my ex-wife’s house and play “Hit THe Road Jack” while dacning and licking her mail.

Edward the Black Prince: IF THE ZOO BANS ME FOR HOLLERING AT THE ANIMALS I WILL FACE GOD AND WALK BACKWARDS INTO HELL

Jehan III de Grailly: its fucked up how there are like 1000 christmas songs but only 1 song aboutr the boys being back in town.

Louis II, comte de Flandre: U Have Forced Me To Take Extreme Measures To Protect My Business And My Lifestyle.

Blanche de Navarre: the wise man bowed his head solemnly and spoke “theres actually zero difference between good & bad things. you imbecile. you fucking moron”

Charles II de Navarre: Sovereign Citizens Getting Owned Compilation

Philippe de Navarre: shooting off automatic rifles making horrible diarrhea shit noises as the recoil makes my tiny dick flop around. hell yeah. thats cool to me.

Charles, Dauphin de Viennois: surprise, dad. while you were witnessing the pennsylvania state lottery i tried on all your work gloves and they looked very handsome on me.

#hundred years' war #medieval #dril #english history #french history #european history #history #i should be making a rubric but this is way more fun

[zoeygreensimblr]

Enchanted (episode 2)

I woke up well before my alarm went off, every muscle in my body felt like it was being pulled apart. How do people do this exercise thing and just love it? This is torture and now this trainer guy wants us to do personal training 3 times a week, ugh kill me now. Stupid Angus with his stupid pretty face making it impossible to say no to. Stupid Tess for roping me into this stupid pack, I swear she just wanted to see me suffer while convincing me "It's for the greater good, think of how fit we will be come Summer". Stupid Summer, I can't hide under layers when it's boiling hot. Curse everything!!!

I reach for my phone to shut off my alarm and I notice I've got a text message from a number that I don't know.

See you at 4pm, looking forward to it

Clearly it's been sent to me by accident because, lets face it, I very rarely make plans with anyone and if I I do then I spend all week trying to think up ways to get out of them, Im just going to reply and tell them they have the wrong number.

This is Angus BTW, Your personal Trainer

Great, Mister perfect is a morning person who sends early morning messages reminding his victims he hasn't forgotten he scheduled more torture.

Upstairs I can hear Tess dancing around the kitchen as she makes her breakfast. Tess is also a morning person, it's extremely annoying when you're a night owl like myself and you get woken up by the sound of her singing out of key.

The dancing has stopped and has been replaced the sound by her shoes stomping down the stairs

"Zoey, wake up, we are leaving in 30 minutes" she bellows down the hall "and pack your gym clothes, we have training after school and I don't wanna have to make a trip home and then back into the city, it's easier to go from school"

"Im up, going to shower now" I reply, while I still lay there knowing she won't leave without me

My door flies open suddenly and she's now invading my space with her perkiness.

"you're not up at all, get up!!! Did you see Angus' texted us, I'm so excited to start personal training, arn't you?"

Why must she be so happy all the time?

"Im sore Tess, all over, maybe I shouldn't go today, I'll start PT on Friday" Please Tess, please hear my plea, don't make me go back there but no, she doesn't listen to a word I've said, instead she's shoving my gym clothes into my school bag.

Im up, Im showered, Im ready for school and it only took 40 minutes.

We attend a very elite private school in the heart of Forgotten Hollow. I love going to school here, Tess and I share a great group of friends and Im a straight A student.

Tess' Boyfriend Declan meets us the the school gate, just like he has done every day since he and Tess started dating in year 9, he kisses her on the cheek and greets me with a wave.

"Our personal trainer has a thing for Zoey, I know it, Im never wrong about these things" Tess greets him every morning with useless information that he pretends to take an interest in.

"Way to go Zoey" He enthuses, as if he really cares

"He doesn't have thing for me, he was just being friendly to get us to sign up for his stupid torture sessions and now we have to go back there again this afternoon so he can whip us into shape" I moan

"Tess we have school captain meetings after school today, did you forget?" Declan reminds her.

"Oh shit, I did forget, sorry Zoey, you're facing the torture chamber alone today, don't worry, you'll be fine though" she said, not looking one bit apologetic, she's almost laughing, "You should see Zo in front of this guy Declan, she goes bright red and he just keeps staring at her, he's so into her"

That afternoon I board the train alone to San Myshuno, arriving at the gym just before 4. As Im checking in at the reception desk Angus comes running up to me.

"No Tess today?" he asks and Im left wondering if he's somewhat disappointed that he's realised he's going to be stuck attempting to make conversation with the socially recluse twin

"She forgot she had a meeting to attend today so Im sorry but it's just me this afternoon, did you wanna cancel?" I struggle to get my words out through bouts of shyness creeping in.

Please say yes, we can cancel and wait until Tess returns.

"That's ok, her loss is your gain because now you get me 100% to yourself for a whole hour. How are you feeling after yesterday's session?"

"If I can be honest with you, Im hurting a lot, everywhere"I reply, in the hopes he will send me home to rest.

"I thought you would be sore today but you put in an amazing effort last night, you should be proud of yourself, Im really proud of you, Ive had a lot of women run away mid class and never come bak but not you, you stuck it out, that shows you've got stamina" He flashes me that million dollar smile and I feel my face going bright red, "Ok, lets get started, I'll take things nice and slow with you today, due to the recovery pain you're in"

He leads me to the treadmill and starts me on a low setting, just as promised.

"We're going to be working pretty closely together a lot so what do you say we work on kicking this shyness to the curb too? Lets get you to be a strong, confident woman"

The redness is creeping back into my cheeks, why does he care if I'm shy and not confident?

"We can try but I can't make any promises, I'm socially awkward, Tess is the social butterfly, she loves going to parties and to clubs whereas I'd much rather sit at home binge watching Grey's Anatomy" Why am I volunteering information about being a wallflower? He's going to think I'm such a loser.

"McDreamy and McSteamy are the way to any girls heart" he laughs "I love a good binge watch myself"

"You watch Grey's Anatomy?" I ask, shocked, Ive never met a guy who likes Grey's, but to be fair I don't really talk to many boys, just Declan and only because he's always hanging around Tess.

"I live with my older sister and she's somewhat obsessed with it, she rewatches it every Summer and we only have one TV in the apartment so I'm also forced to watch it too" He laughs, "Do you like movies?"

"I love movies, it's one of the only times I enjoy leaving the house, when something new comes out. I sometimes think I just go for the popcorn though" I reply "what about you?"

"I also love going to the movies but I don't go for the popcorn" He explains "I usually bring my own snack, I don't do carbs, Im just really careful about what I put in my body" He winks at me like I'm in on some secret joke. Is he flirting with me? Is this what flirting is? No way, he's just being cocky, I'm sure of it, Who would flirt with a sweaty introvert who just admitted to carboloading as an excuse to see a movie?

Ive got a plan, if I just stop talking then he will stop talking and I can just stop overthinking everything. I blame Tess, she got into my head with this whole "He likes you" bullshit that she carried on with. I wish Tess was here so the focus wasn't all on me. Why did she have to be popular and be voted in as School Captain? Why couldn't she just think of what coming here alone would do to me.

My plan is working, he's not even trying to talk to me, he's typing something on his phone. Good, just stay focused on your phone buddy, no more chatty chats to Zoey.

My plan lasted all of 3 minutes, he looks up from his phone and asks "Your surname is Green right"

"umm, yeah"

"and it's Zoey, spelt with just an E or EY?"

"EY, why?"

"Im just searching for you on simstergram, oh yeah, there you are. Following and I expect a follow back"

"Do you also expect interesting content too because you will be sadly disappointed" I throw in my own wink at the end and he just laughs.

As I'm about to leave I see that it's started to snow, it wasn't even forecast to snow today, it's been unseasonably warm since the middle of last week so I didn't even consider to bring a jacket. The train station is a 10 minute walk from the gym and the another 15 minute walk to my house. Im going to freeze if I go out there without cover. Best to wait inside and call Don to come pick me up. I pull out my phone and start typing in my home number, hoping that he's home, when I hear Angus behind me.

"Oh wow, it's snowing.How are you getting home Zoey?"

"I was going to catch the train but I didn't bring a coat so Im just going to call my step dad and ask if he can come get me"

"From Brindleton Bay? That's crazy, I'll take you home"

"Oh no, you don't have to, that's well out of your way"

"How do you know Im not already going that way?"

"I just assumed you lived in San Myshuno when you mentioned you live in an apartment"

"ah, umm, yeah I do but really it's no trouble, you were my last client for the day anyway and I'll just be going home to an empty house, my Sister is travelling at the moment, so I really don't mind and it would give you someone to talk to on the way home, although Im sure Im no substitute for Tess"

"Tess could talk under water, I swear." I laugh "well as long as you're sure it's no trouble. I'll call Don though and tell him we are having a guest for dinner, can't have you driving me all the way to Brindleton Bay and back in the snow on an empty stomach"

He smiles "Thanks Zoey, you're a sweetheart"

Here comes the blushing again

The traffic leaving the city is congested with everyone finishing work at 5 and heading back to the suburbs and the snow storm is picking up.

"I wouldn't be surprised if we get a blizzard tonight" Angus muses

"I would love that, Tess and I have a tradition of watching movies and getting drunk in our basement on nights of a blizzard because school get cancelled for the next day"

"That's awesome. You two are really close hey?"

"Yeah, she's not just my twin sister, she's also my best friend. She pushes me out of my comfort zone all the time, which can be annoying but she's always got my back whenever someone pushes me around"

"she pushed you into coming to the gym didn't she?"

"Is it that obvious that I don't want to be there?"

He laughs, "Ah yes but I think you'll slowly warm up to it. I hated it at first too but I had a lot of weight that needed to come off, not like you, little miss petite"

"Are you seriously trying to convince me that you didn't always have washboard abs?"

He looks at me, raising an eyebrow "Have you been checking me out Miss Green?"

SHIT!!! I've somehow stumbled into unknown territory, flirting, I can feel my breathing becoming more rapid, I'm going to have a panic attack, which is not unknown territory but Im trapped in a car with a virtual stranger.

"Oh fuck, Zoey, shit, I can't pull over, just deep breaths hun, in and hold it then out" He's trying to not get panicked himself as he's trying to calm me down and it's working.

A few moments of silence pass until he asks me "Does that happen often?"

"unfortunately yes" I tell him, embarrassed. "I just get overwhelmed with some social interactions"

"like flirting?"

"Yeah, I don't  flirt, ever"

He looks over at me again and says with a smile "We're gonna work on that"

We arrive at my house just as the storm starts to get worse. We make a mad dash to the front door where we are greeted by Tess, who is obviously amused with the whole situation.

She yells out to our Mother Ruth and Don "Zoey brought a boy home"

I could kill her, I really could, she has no tact but Angus just laughs like he's in on her joke and I just roll my eyes.

Don ventures out from the kitchen to greet today's unexpected dinner guest, he use to Tess bringing Declan for dinner but this is a first, Zoey with a boy.

Don reaches out to shake hands with Angus, "Hey, Im Don, Zoey and Teresa's step father, their mother is around here somewhere" He turns around to yell out to mum

"Ruthie, come meet Zoey's friend" he turns back to Angus "Sorry, I didn't catch your name"

"Angus, Angus McKennzie"

Tess and I exchange looks, we didn't know his surname until now either.

"McKennzie? You're not Imogen McKennzie's younger brother are you"

Angus smiles, "Yes, how do you know Immie?"

"We were high school sweethearts back in the day, I use to help her babysit you, you've certainly grown, granted you were only around 2 or 3 back then" Don explains

"Oh look out, old Donny boys got his throw back thursday voice on" Tess muses and I laugh. We love Don but he does like to go on, a lot, about "back when I was in high school"

"Girls, stop picking on Don, he's cooked us a lovely roast for dinner" My mother says as she enters the room. "Hi Angus, welcome to the mad house, these two like to stir their step father non stop"

"He loves it" Tess and I say in unison.

"What's Imogen up to these days anyway? I imagine she's still travelling the world and  breaking hearts" he laughs to himself

"well it's funny you say that, she's on a jungle adventure in Selvadorada right now but she'll be back in a few months. We own the gym together and coming into summer we get an influx of new sign ups so I'll need her help real soon"

Tess and I again exchange looks, He owns the gym?

After dinner, Tess and I do the washing up and Don goes outside to look how much snow has fallen, he comes back inside and informs us that the streets are covered in a thick blanket of whiteness. "You're not going to be able to get home tonight Angus and I highly doubt there will be any work or school tomorrow so it looks like you girls have a playmate for drunken shenanigans, best go make him up a bed in the basement"

"Im sure he wouldn't mind bunking in with Zoey if he had to" Tess teases and I shoot her a dirty look.

"Come along Angus, you can help us mix cocktails" Tess says, taking charge.

We've never had an intruder join us on Blizzard night and Tess is finding it all too exciting.

"Full warning, the more drunk Zoey gets, the less awkward she becomes" she informs Angus, I throw a cushion at her to try and get her to shut up and Angus sits there grinning at us.

We pick out "He's just not that into you" to watch and set our drinking rules. I can feel I'm getting tipsy midway through the movie, "She's such a light weight" Tess announces to Angus.

"No I'm not, you just made my drinks really strong for your own amusement" I protest

Tess and Angus exchange looks and just burst out laughing, I knew it!

"So Angus, don't you have to call your wife and tell her you're not coming home? That you're staying with your mistresses tonight" Tess asks, not so subtle

"I'm 22 Tess, I have no wife"

"Girlfriend then?" she presses on, I know where she's leading us to and Im sure he does too.

"No girlfriend either" he explains and we exchange looks, "very much single and have been for 2 years now"

"Why did you break up?" there's never a question Tess doesn't feel she can't ask, no matter how personal

"She cheated on me, for months, with my best friend"

"Aww Angus, that's heartbreaking, isn't that heartbreaking Zoey?"

"What a bitch " I interject and they both look at me shocked, ok I may be a bit more than tipsy

"Zoey, you should give Angus a hug to heal his broken heart"

"Ok" I reply "But only if you let me feel your abs"

Angus looks at Tess "Is she drunk?"

Tess nods, laughing "I told you, less awkward, she can't overthink when she's drunk"

"Stop talking about me as if Im not here" I shout as I run my palm over the bumps on Angus' torso, while looking him in the eye.

"sorry Zo" he whispers in my ear.

We reach the end of the movie and the bottle of vodka, which isn't surprising when Tess is the mixologist.

"That's Zoey's favourite movie" Tess informs Angus

"It's pretty good but I think they need to do a sequel and call it "He is into you but can't tell if you're into him" what do you think Zoey?" Angus asks

"I'd watch the shit out of that" I reply

Angus and Tess both burst out laughing, I've clearly missed the joke and I just don't care, Im having too much fun.

"Angus you are welcomed to join us again for blizzard night, you're too much fun and Tess, he's so pretty too"My speech is becoming slurry

"Well  Angus, I think she just answered your question without even realising it was directed at her" Tess muses

"Stop talking about me like Im not here" I shout, yet again

"Sorry Zo" they both say in unison.

#sims 4 gameplay #sims 4 city living #sims 4 get to work #sims4 #sims4simblr

[5hineesback]

feel korea fanacc 2017 (exid biased)

this is going to be a very detailed fanacc of the full day, including the bad events which took place before the concert

first off let me say that kpop fans are honestly such lovely people. i came across a few bad eggs during the day but overall everyone was amazing. i arrived earlier than my friend and i made friends so quickly with the people who were in front of me in the queue, and i ended up spending the whole concert with them

secondly let me say that the organisation of this concert was an absolute joke, specifically the queueing. it was terrible, the worst organisation i’ve seen in a long time. they originally had one queue for everything, then created a ‘concert’ queue and made people move, then when the daytime event queue had died down we got moved back to where we originally were - except there was no guidance. everyone just ran for it. people at the front ended up at the back and people who’d just arrived got to the front. there was also a severe problem of people pushing in at the front - there was no barrier to block it and when we complained the security didn’t even try to do anything about it. 

i got to the venue at around 12:15, joined the only queue there was, was then moved to the ‘concert’ queue at around 12:45, was very near the front and managed to stay in basically the same place when we got moved back to our original line. then waited for about 6 hours, filled with events such as, as ive mentioned, people pushing in at the front and pretending they were there the whole time, the barrier being widened to such a degree at the front that there was no order at all

then came the worse part. we were lining up around the back of the building, and they wanted to move us to the front doors. so they stood back, and told us to go. everyone ran, again. i got pushed into walls and an open door, girls were falling over or hurting themselves on the barriers as everyone tried to get through. we had been asking them throughout the day how they were planning to get us in - we suggested sending us in groups of 10 or 20, or just making sure we all got to the doors one at a time. instead there was hundreds of people running to the doors, filling up the street because there was no barrier there to meet us. again, i managed to keep my place, pretty much, but a lot of people lost theirs, including girls at the front who had been there since 6am to queue. then despite the street being full of fans, they then told us to get in single file. which was fucking stupid because it wasnt possible. not unless they moved everyone forward enough, past the doors, to make enough room to move everyone against the wall, or move people backwards from the back of the queue, which literally went around the whole block. we eventually got in by them just giving up and letting us in one at a time with as little pushing as possible

but anyway, thats enough of that, although i will be complaining officially online lmao

okay the actual concert. by some miracle, i just got to the barrier, i got the last space. but myself and a couple of girls to my left were in the worst place to be at the barrier - in front of us was a camera man officially recording for the tv screen above, so during the concert idols would often be blocked by the camera which will be shown in my exid fancams lmao. but hey, i was at the barrier, i can’t complain. the distance from the barrier to the stage was about 10 feet i think, it was pretty large tbh so im rly glad i got to be there. we also got given water by very nice security thank u security

they were showing mvs for about an hour while we waited. if you were there, the first scream @ jeonghwa’s appearance in any mv was always me jsyk dklfjhdskj

when the concert started, there was a taekwondo performance which was a m a z i n g, they were breaking wood with their feet and at one point i was scared the broken wood would hit me lmao

after that, hani came on mc’ing, along with two other guys who i don’t know. the moment she appeared i Died. she was wearing such a pretty white dress, shes so angelic and cute and beautiful. she came out to mc after every performance, except it was just the guys when exid was about to perform. she spoke about going to see the disadvantaged kids yesterday and one of the guys was like “hanis not just beautiful, she has a beautiful heart” and hani said “the most beautiful is everyone here!” jdksa shes honestly a Dream

knk was first to perform, then snuper, then exid, then highlight. i’m not gonna pretend i was really there to see anyone but exid, because i wasn’t. but i did hearts to all the idols and i really enjoyed all their performances. knk sang knock first which is the only song i like by them so to hear it was so great. they’re such good dancers and they’re all very pretty

after knk, hani and the guys introduced a “special performance because london has gone through some hardships recently”. it was hyerin singing “you raise me up” and it was so beautiful i would have cried if i weren’t so focused on filming haha

then it was snuper’s turn to perform. i only know platonic love, so i enjoyed that, but i was pretty clueless about the rest of the songs. i still liked it tho. during one of their songs they brought a fan on stage to sing to her and also threw roses to the crowd. according to my friend who was a bit further back one of the members aimed one at her but a girl in front of her caught it lol. one of the members was so funny idk his name but fans threw a signed uk flag at the stage and he put it on like a cape and he came over to our section loads. hes my bias now but who is he

after that (i think??), knk came back on to perform a cover of an ed sheeran song which i don’t know the name of. everyone sang with them and it was rly Nice

then my girls!!! arrived and i screamed So Loud it was too much. they’re all so beautiful, but u kno i love my girl jeonghwa and omg... pictures and videos dont do her justice at all shes honestly Ethereal i went into shock and i almost teared up. i saw a girl so beautiful i started crying???

they started with hot pink and i could kinda feel how empty it was without solji but it was still amazing to see the four of them. then they moved onto night rather than day, then ah yeah, then finally up and down. i was trying So Hard to get interaction, i made eye contact with jeonghwa a few times and every time i was givin her hearts... she just kinda glanced over me tho.... its ok i still love u

the girl next to me got So much interaction, from l.e especially. she had a homemade exid fan sign and l.e seemed to love it haha. i probably should have made something too

exid’s performance seemed to go so quickly, i filmed most of their songs and some of their talk. i haven’t even watched the videos yet i’m gonna die

after exid, there was a performance with snuper and a group of girl dancers who i think won a competition during the day? they did dance covers of a few bts songs

then highlight came on and performed two of their new songs, before two of their old ones. i rly enjoyed the old ones, the new ones... they were okay but i liked being reminded of their old image as beast. i think this was when one of them motioned for us to clap, i was one of the first to start so he looked at me was he was walking our way and nodded at me which was cool lol. i think it was highlight anyway.... and i think it was that time... honestly the boy groups... kinda mushed together for me i could even begin to tell you which member it was. i made eye contact with a few guys of the various groups so i cant rly remember specifically

during highlights performance this annoying girl came up behind me and was literally pushing against me, trying to move my hair, touching my arms and back before eventually asking if i could move over. i did, but i later found out that the girl had literally somehow managed to get to the barrier from the back. she was rude as hell. also there was fireworks during the performance which scared the crap out of me i was like that compilation vid of chanyeol

after highlight, there was an encore where all the groups came out and threw balls and balloons. knk was in front of our section and exid were next to them more towards the middle. i feel bad for saying it but i ... rly wanted exid in front of me lmao. i did hearts towards them and here is where i might have got interaction from hani but im not sure???? she looked in my direction as i was looking at her and making a heart with my hands and she grinned and did a thumbs up but im not sure it was at me it might have been someone near me. i like to think it was at me tho. people around me got a lot of interaction with different idols but i didnt?? thats going back to diy stuff tho, ppl around me had created signs and written messages on paper and stuff so i guess thats where that came from. i rly would have done something too for exid but i didnt think id be that close, never mind at the barrier so i didn’t see much point

there was also confetti flying from a machine right in front of me and i accidentally dropped my exid fan sign i was given in the queue over the barrier so i caught confetti in my bag to take home instead lol. the annoying girl was still there and still annoying, she threw something at knk she’d made and one of the members got it and she started screaming and crying and yelling i love u which i wouldnt mind but... after the way she was so rude to me (and as i found out later, other ppl) nah why does she deserve that lmao. she also ended up getting a ball since security came over with two that had dropped and she said the yellow was hers... it wasnt she even asked me who signed it lmao

overall it was a really good concert and i cant wait to watch the videos back. it had ups and downs but despite having to miss london pride for it i dont regret going. i got to meet some great people and ofc i got to see my Special Girls in the flesh... they said they’d come back soon i hope so. ive drunk so much water tonight and im about to go and drink more also i can’t walk

#im prob forgetting some stuff it was a long day #i'll be posting my exid vids tomorrow probably #my fanaccs #ellie rambles

[vegils]

im... a sucker 4 surveys hey!!!

1: What is your name and does it mean anything?

marinella, someone told me it means “traveller” but i highly doubt that i like the break down of my name more marina, meaning “of the sea” and ella for “guiding light”

2: How long have you known your best friend? 

my best friend sweetlana!!! been my good friend!!! for 7 DANG YEARS!!! 

3: What position do you normally sleep in? 

i sleep in fetal/yearning position and i think the description of the personalities that sleep in fetal/yearning position is very accurate

4: Were you a part of any “clique” in high school?

mmm i hung out with a lot of different people in high school i went through several cliques in the span of my four years i hung out with “popular” people, artsy groups, anime nerds, and drama people

5: Who was your favorite teacher in high school and why? 

my biggest inspiration was my speech and drama teacher!! i love u miss macuha!!! one time i was crying about her leaving and she grabbed me by the shoulders and told me to never back down and keep doing what i’m doing and that some day i’ll be a great performer and i bawled on her lap she’s an angel and to this day her words still haunt me!! i never felt the reward a teacher reaped from seeing a student reach their full potential

6: Do you wish to travel a lot?

because im so young i do think about travelling a lot but it makes me sad to think about never being able to travel and i have gone to places but i wish i could see other grander countries i never had the opportunity to see

7: Did you participate in any sports while in school?

um...... i played badminton lmao 

8: Show a sample of your handwriting:

how tho

9: Have you ever given blood?

apparently if ur anemic or have history of anemia then u can’t donate blood which makes me sad if i could i would!!!

10: Do you like the way that you grew up?

besides all the fun i had i wish i grew up more confident i am a very doubtful person and i grew up in a pretty hostile home and it felt very scattered and broken to me and i just wish those situations were different, other than that i think i am lucky to grow up ok

11: Do you like your siblings? Why or why not?

i like all of my sisters but they can get very frustrating at times i think we stand better now than we did as kids

12: How did you meet your best friend and why did you become friends?

i met sweetlana on the strokes tumblr tinychat back when they had a roaring fandom and we discovered that we’re both from chicago and we’d talk about silly things and we lost touch for a while but then we reconnected and she’s so darling!!! she would show me her paintings of the blues brothers and we’d talk about our hopes and wishes and now i realize we’ve been doing that for 7 years!!! all we do is exchange selfies and drawings and fantasize about crushes !!!i love her! i can’t imagine not knowing her and never meeting her!

13: Name one movie that made you cry.

my girl.......... shit dude

14: Do you prefer to read poetry, write poetry, or neither?

i’m not poetic but i like to HEAR poetry i love hearing the delivery 

15: Things about someone that you find attractive?

i love people who are kind and thoughtful which is rly generic i also love the funny it doesn’t even have to be calculated jokes it can just be the way you said something or a facial expression i like people who manage to share a language with me that can’t be figured out by other people i think having a connection to a person where you can read each others minds can b creepy but also cool cuz u hang out w them so often that you can basically understand each other without much effort 

16: What song are you currently listening to now?

year of the rabbit by eskimeaux

17: Have you ever broken a bone? If so, how?

nope 

18: A random memory from you childhood:

going to chinatown and racing to the chinese zodiac signs and climbing up the stairs with my sisters, getting sponge cake and walking around the old sanrio store pointing out what i want

19: Where did you grow up? chicago 

20: What was the last thing you watched on tv?

lmao we’re watching 13RW and its not for everyone but i read the book and im v invested

21: Do you think you’d make a good parent?

really!! hope id be! i mean i am cool with or without having kids but i want to be a good parent

22: Would you like to meet any of your Tumblr friends in person?

i already met some of my tumblr friends!! i met sweetlana and coney!!! i would like to meet @iamonmy-way when will i meet u!!! 

22: What was the last dream you remember having?

my phone was hacked and it looked like internet explorer on my iphone and my cousin tried to retrieve back to normal by playing against my hacker on a boss battle level of mario

23: When is your birthday?

june 2 :---)

24: How many pillows do you sleep with? 

2 and 1 reading pillow ^_^

25: Do you wear glasses? If so, how long have you been wearing glasses?

i’ve been wearing eye glasses since i was 6 and i’m 21 now so u do the math bud

26: What color is your hair?

black/brown

27: Name 5 facts about your appearance:

ive been told i have a nice complexion, small mouth, chubby cheeks, small hands and long torso

28: What is your favorite soda?

cream.. soda... i need to go to Hell

29: What is a strange talent that you have?

reading peoples moods online lmao 

30: How’s the weather right now?

a cool and calming evening 

31: Why did one of your friendships end?

this question makes me sad lmao

32: Who do you miss right now?

oops i can’t reveal who or what or when but i am missing someone

33: Why did your last relationship end?

because i realized i don’t like them that much and that i don’t understand dating I AM A VERY CONFUSED PERSON when i reflect on dating i realize i hate it so much but also crave it but when i have it i’m very repulsed

34: Are you still figuring out who you are? 

yes!!! i am frustrated at myself because i don’t know who i am or what i want and i feel like it has set me back so much that i’m stagnant 

35: Have you ever been admitted to a hospital? Why? 

ya i had dengue fever and it was probably the most concerned i’ve seen my parents with me

36: What is your favorite restaurant?

pastaria!!! in st louis!! it’s so good!

37: What is word that you always seem to spell wrong?

privilege 

38: Would ever adopt kids?

not against the idea of adopting children!!! 

39: What is your favorite kind of pizza?

i like spinach on my pizza

40: What was your first thought when you woke up this morning?

why is it so dreadful to find yourself in bed with a whole day ahead of you

41: When was the last time you got really really happy and why? 

um!!! my crush!!! k*rt !!! when we played the game!! and they were teasing and attacking me during the game! ah!!! 

42: What’s the strangest thing you’ve ever eaten?

defo dinuguan (pigs blood stew)!! i dont recommend!! i just dip my puto in the sauce and call it a day! not a laman fan! 

43: How do you start a conversation?

i tell them something embarrassing that’s also relateable and revealing and hope they find me somebody to be comfortable around!!!

44: What’s a band you’ve been obsessed with lately?

i hate answering this....... but joji........

45: Do you come from a family “of money?”

nah dude

46: Do you have a bucket list?

i think that’s what my life was missing tbh

47: What is your favorite series of books?

i don’t know i haven’t read a series of books in quite a long time i think i pretended to like percy jackson in high school lmao and i was such a nerd for hunger games but i don’t think anything could replace my deepest love for series of unfortunate events, the boxcar children, judy moody, and horrible harry! ooh! and amelia bedelia!!!

48: When was the last time you laughed so hard your stomach hurt?

i laughed rly hard last night cause patrick was so invested in 13 reasons why and my sister n i kept asking 4 justice 4 zach dempsey and patrick threw a pillow at me for saying that what zach did was severe in hannah’s eyes

49: Where do you go when you’re sad?

i slip into bed and silently cry or if i don’t need that i cry in the shower ahhh how pathetic

50: 5 random facts about yourself:

i actually am rly good at acting and i don’t think anybody but high school and college ppl know this, i’m painfully shy, i don’t like mayo!! all of my goldfish in the past have all been named variations of “Freddy” and !!! i am rly good at stitch (from disney’s lilo and stitch) impressions

[flame-cat]

idk why im making this but its fun, maybe some fahc writers can use it

note- since im making these notes to fit into fahc-verse, i use she/her with jack. more to be added... uh... whenever

asset seizure and firewall protection

almost immediately- gavin calls money "bundts." ryan immediately understands what he means :25- jack points out ryans fish tank is broken. ryan insists its supposed to look that way, and that jack doesnt understand art :47- ryan insists everyone try on costumes. michael is the only one not upset about his fashion choices 1:10- gavin admits that "none of these outfits are more douchey than what i usually wear." michael agrees

1:50- michael explains jack is replacing jeremy. gavin says he feels sorry for jeremy. michael says "you feel sorry for him, but thats not stopping you from joining." gavin agrees 3:20- "michael, you wanna fistfight on the helipad?" gavin says, with no prompting whatsoever. michael nonchalantly agrees, but says he cant make it up there, and suggests gavin jump from the roof to the lobby below. gavin does so. jack immediately runs at gavin and punches him in the face. michael joins the brawl against gav soon after. gavin loses. ryan, meanwhile, just sorta lets them have their fun 5:20- gavin: "because this is the vehicle that most, closestly, resembles, my face, can i drive it?" *referring to the "nose car"* 5:30- ryan expresses discomfort at the others' revealing attire. michael jokes "you know you want it" 5:54- gavin: "oh, jack, nice pair of tits!" jack: "oh, thank you! ive been working out" 6:10- *no prompting* gavin: "oh, dude, im jumpin' out!" ryan *nonchalant*: "why?" jack: "bye, gavin!" gavin: "wheee!" ryan: "dont die this time." 6:20- ryan: "its on hard. cause we're hard... core." 6:35- gavin *confused and slightly disappointed*: "i dont think theres anyone to shoot" 7:05- michael: "oh, ryan, youre in the coolest spot" ryan: "yeah, no, this is the death spot" michael: "yeah, youll die, but youll look cool doing it" 7:15- jack *a little sarcastically* "good thing we all have body armor on" *everyone but michael laughs* michael: "i do..." 7:40- *gavin nearly flips the car, everyone yells* ryan: "gavin! this is why we dont let you drive the car!" michael *nonchalant*: "its ok, im still hangin on" noteworthy throughout- everyone appears to cringe and make distgusted noises at civilians being hurt, but laugh at the same time in a grotesquely fascinated way 8:40- *gavin crashes, everyone falls off* gavin: "ive found the first road block" ryan: "didjya??? is it your driving skills??" noteworthy- ryan always appears most peeved at gavins lack of driving skills. michael usually takes it in stride noteworthy- jack is usually the least vocal in times of crisis 9:20- gavin expresses pride in taking out some trucks and cars. ryan is preoccupied with the fact that he was shot multiple times. michael, indignant, says he "was bippin" noteworthy- michael and ryan tend to argue in times of crisis. its usually michael who starts it 9:40- ryan abandons the vehicle in favor of shooting people on foot, unhappy with gavins driving. he passes it off as "being able to shoot better" but its a thinly veiled passive aggressive jab at gavins apparent unconcern for his friends wellbeing noteworthy- ryan is the king of snark 9:45- gavin sends a car flying into the river, and cheers and hollers. michael nonchalantly says "that was actually... the was pretty awesome." he doesnt seem sarcastic 9:45- meanwhile, having said nothing this whole time, jack is on foot trying to actually complete the mission, probably aware ryan is also, but not with him. she launches an explosive and sets it off, very close to ryan, who appears alarmed. jack just intones "thats me dont worry," and ryan just responds "ok" and doesnt bring it up again noteworthy- jack likes to get things done on her own. so does ryan. ryan and jack appear to have a silent agreement not to get in each others way. ryan appears more forgiving to jack when/if she screws up noteworthy- gavin is always the first and loudest to react to things. ryan follows close behind, more agitated than elated, michael next, and then jack, who mostly seems peeved noteworthy- ryan always gets most agitated with gavin, but its usually when gavin comes close to hurting him noteworthy- though they go off on their own a lot, they keep up constant communication 10:20- ryan: "oops, i shot gavin a bit" gavin: "ah, thats alright." ryan: "dont die. nobody die" *sounding strained* 10:50- not planned, but ryan and michael end up on loading, gavin keeps cops off them with the truck, jack is on foot doing the same 11:40- ryan: "uh, probably someone else should drive... since gavins gonna have to hop out and get drugs" gavin: "nah, ill hop out when we get there" ryan: "...okay" 11:44- unprompted, michael checks to see if ryan is ok. which he is not. short while later, michael mentions hes not doing much better, to which ryan expresses a small amount of concern. no one else comments 11:48- michael falls out somehow. gavin just laughs 12:10- jack: "woohoo! bye, fuckers!" noteworthy- michael seems very subdued here 12:13- michael mentions inevitable failure. gavin: "dyou think we will?" *genuinely suprised* 12:25- michael eggs gavin on as he crashes into and flips cars. he then remembers that he should probably be doing something about the cops behind them. jack agrees, apparently not paying attention either 13:10- gavin makes zooming sounds as they drive off. this appears to be something he does a lot. no one else comments on it 13:35- *approaching a road block* gavin: "dude, which one should i hit?" ryan: "ALL OF THEM!" 13:45- everyone else yells in excitement. michael just seems a little shocked and says, a little louder than usual: "oh my god they fucking exploded" noteworthy- ryan is usually the one to remind the others of the task at hand. jack is content to ride back seat, and gavin and michael are busy being... well, them 13:50- michael *shooting cops*: "bipbipbipbipbipbipbip" gavin: *mimicking intense chase music* the others dont make a comment on it noteworthy- ryan and jack seem content to just let michael and gavin be weirdos without really paying attention to it 14:20- michael freaks out about being shot and dying. ryan, slightly panicked, just tells him not to die over and over again. it doesnt work noteworthy- when gavin asks a question, michael is quickest to reply. ryan is right behind him 15:00- gavin, probably realizing its only fair, asks if anyone wants to drive. ryan accepts after giving everyone armor noteworthy- while jack always gets pinned as "team mom," its more ryan than anyone else. jack tends to just do her own thing. i imagine she would be an excellent mercenary, since she tends not to ask a lot of questions 15:40- jack is not sitting very lady-like 15:45- everyone: *freaking out about to crash* *make it out ok* michael *calmly*: "we're good, we're good." it should be noted he's driving noteworthy- if we're assigning familial roles, then michael is the big brother 16:00- gavin falls out. michael says sorry through his chuckling 16:30- ryan: "its a linear plowing apparatus." what a massive dork 17:00- when jack laughs, theres no holding back. you wanna talk about cancer-curing laughs? right behind geoff ramsey 17:15- gavin is usually a step ahead of everyone else when thinking of ideas. when it comes to focusing on the present, though, he gets caught up in his own head noteworthy- gavin is always the first to admit when he's lost control of a situation noteworthy- ryan never outright rejects anyones ideas, almost ever. if he does, he usually provides sound reasoning, or is joking 17:30- gavin: "oh, i felt bad about that. a cop landed after your smash and i just executed him in the head." no one comments 17:55- roles are switched now: ryan is on foot as a mercenary, michael is doing the same in the truck, and gavin and jack are getting the goods. noteworthy- gavin uses birght fuscia weapons far more than gold ones 18:40- jack is focused and nearly kills ryan 19:20- gavin starts singing. jack boisterously joins in immediately. jack then goes on to talk about something he watched recently, and gavin seems interested 19:55- the truck nearly tips over. everyone freaks out briefly, but once the crisis is averted, gavin and jack immediately go back to their conversation. it should be noted michael is driving 20:20- this time the truck does flip over. michael runs over gavin accidentally. gavin doesnt seem perturbed, though, even when michael apologises. seconds later, he even comments that this "might be the best mission yet" noteworthy- gavin doesnt appear to care a whole lot for his own safety 21:20- jack starts singing. this time gavin joins in 21:40- gavin: "this is, like, fast and furious material. did they ever have one of these?" ryan: "uh, they shouldve" noteworhy- ryan appears to always have some sort of heavy weaponry on him. no one comments on this noteworthy- they discuss team responsibilities while theyre doing things. absolutely no planning whatsoever: they "work" on the fly 22:20- gavin panics about dying. ryan, again, helpfully tells him to "dont die, dont die, please." remarkably, this doesnt work the second time either

#achievement hunter #fahc #fake ah crew #michael jones #gavin free #ryan haywood #jack patillo #pheo notes fahc #<--- tag for these posts i guess #in the life

[yumenosakiacademy]

quietly remembered that no one is into AH here, just anime boyz, thus i wouldnt get asked any so i went “yknow what. okay Yea” n answered all the RT-/AH ask meme questionz on my own. my city now.

1. how did you come across RT/AH? id like 2 day i say i saw a clip of rage quit on tumblr (the no luca no one i think!) and checked out rage quit then later AH? i think so, yep!  2. first RT/AH thing you watched? rage quit!! i found it rly funny in 6th or 7th grade, n still do now tbh!

3. first impression of it? ’it’? oh, yea mean AH? i dunno! funny, i guess! obv! 4. favorite male employee? michael n ryan! i only rly watch AH sry gjhms 5. favorite female employee? meg i think! or lindsay. 6.+7 skipped bc i dont watch R/vB 8. favorite rwby character? ruby is rly cool! neo is also neat! i also like neon bc Nya if we can say fav side character!  9. favorite RT short? dunno... sry. i dont watch most a the RT stuff, just AH ‘m sry ;w;  10. favorite AH staff member? same as #4! michael n ryan.  11. team lads or gents? TEAM LADZ ALL THE WAY, BABEY!! i like all of team ladz n their dynamic!! yes, that includes the team ladz w ray n the team ladz w jeremy. both r good!! 12. favorite lad? michael! gavin is prob 2nd n jeremy is 3rd i think? i dunno tbh theyre all funny! 13. favorite gent? my mad k!ng, mister ryan!! ;3 14. can you tell jack and ryan apart? i indeedy can! it’s not too hard! p easy, actually! i think even when i was starting out i could usually tell em apart! 15. favorite AH team (n!ce dynamite, r&r c0nnection etc) if u wouldve asked me this a few yrs back, i woulda shrieked team n!ce dynamite haha but hmm.... id like 2 say i like n!ce dynamite, battle budd!es, n l0ve n stuff! probably in that order, but im not too sure tbh! 16. favorite minecraft let’s play? okay, uhm, i dont remember a lot of them before, like, 240 smth bc that’s when i resumed here in 2019 so ill go from 240 smth to 353 n ill say Achievement Highlands! i rly liked those gjhnsm 17. favorite gta let’s play? i cant remember any in particular sry! probably one of the heist eps tho 18. favorite other let’s play? idk tbh! since play palz is featured in another ask, i cant answer w those haha so im not too sure! i mostly stick to m!necraft, gt/a (in the past), and some of the play palz ;w; 19. favorite heist? again, i dont remember things well, im sry! ive been meaning 2 rewatch the heists tho ;w; 20. favorite slow mo guys episode? i dont watch em! 21. favorite play palz? the who’s ur Da/ddy ones (and the grandma one that was similar)! 22. favorite rage quit? ohhh um... theyre all so funny! n i cant remember enough of one in particular so.. haha..... can i say all of them? yea! 23. if you could pick any 4 employees to be on the podcast, who would u pick? michael, gavin, jeremy, n ummm....ryan, prob. ladz n king! my favs. 24. do you have any RT merch? i do! ....not. rip ;w; 25. favorite merch item? idk most of the merch on the site bc i dont visit the merch site Ever gjhnsm i dont think i ever hav actually!! can i say the michael, ryan, and gavin body pillowz as a joke tho and also bc the art is neat gjhnsdm 26. favorite RTAA? oh i havent seen too many of these haha.... i guess the mav!n sky fact0ry wedding one? bc ive seen it like 2-3 times! 27. favorite “other” series? (happy hour, rt life, immersion, social disorder etc) i feel like a fake fan bc i only watch AH gjhnsdj um. ill hav 2 say None ;;w;; ive seen a few eps of immersion tho so i guess that? 28. who would you most want to have a drink with? ah! um! im underage! owo but if i did, either jeremy or michael!prob jerems. 29. what 3 employees would you want in your car on a road trip? jeremy, ryan, n uhm.. i feel like michael’d get too loud, so maybe jack tbh? or lindsay! or.. oh! my gosh! matt, actually! jeremy, ryan, n matt, prob. or jack. 30. favorite RT/AH quote/meme? oh bro, thatz hard................. i like a lot of em! i cant pick one ‘m sry ;w; can all of gavin’s screams ([gavin screaming]) b one haha 31. if you worked for RT, what would be your ideal job? social media management! i cant do much else okay ;w; also im good on social media so! :3 32.+33.+34. who did you initially think the killer was in 10LR? + who did you initially think would survive in 10LR? + did you make any correct predictions for 10LR? i dont think i tried to guess, actually haha. 35. who would you have liked to see in 10LR that wasn’t in it? all my favs at the time were in it i think, so! no one, i guess haha. 36. who is your favorite RT employee to follow on twitter? i dont follow any of em. i rarely use twitter, and even then, just for anime fanart. 37.+38.+39.have you been to a RT event? + have you met anyone from RT/AH?+ are you a sponsor? the answer to all of these is no, and ;w; for the first two. let’s play l!ve came to my state (like, the big city p close to my town) but it was kinda expensive so i didnt go.  40. is there a RT series you want to watch, but haven’t gotten around to? on the sp0t! also mayb sugar p!ne 7. 41. is there a game they haven’t played that you would like them to? dream da-ddy, prob......... lmao gjhnsm just for the lolz. idk abt many other games so! 42. have you ever played a game you wouldn’t normally have, but they made it look fun? nope!  43. favorite song the guys have sung during a LP? i cant remember most of them, sry! but id like to say i like the one they did during achieveland where they kept yelling “FOREEEEVER CUM!” 44. favorite “gavin or google” question? dont remember most/any of em sry! 45. favorite heist outfit(s)? uh.. i dont remember most of them but geoff’s yellow booty shorts. Top. also lindsay in the white suit was? a Power Move. 46.+47. skipped bc i dont watch OTS 48. favorite ryan flub? dont remember most of em! 49. favorite RT vine? i only remember a few, but the one where michael jumped into the box or the gavin one w the table thump where he goes “is my pen!s too big?” 50. have you ever purchased something from a RT sponsor? (naturebox, lootcrate, shari’s berries etc) nope!

#i figured i wouldnt get any but might get humored then remembered no one here likes AH just my dumb ass n that one (1) person in my activity #so i dropped an F in my own chat. this was kinda a waste of time but w/e. who am i if not a dumbass who wastes every living second #delete later #info

[positivepsychologyinterventions]

Podcast: A Bipolar and a Schizophrenic Talk Self-Sabotage



Most of us are to blame for our failures, believe it or not. We didn’t practice enough, plan ahead, or work hard enough. If we are honest, we could have done more to succeed, but something stopped us. In this episode, our hosts discuss why people sabotage their own success and fess up to whether or not they are sabotaging their own.

  SUBSCRIBE & REVIEW

“People would rather fail because they didn’t try rather than fail because they weren’t good enough.” – Gabe Howard

  Highlights From ‘Self-Sabotage’ Episode

[2:00] Do we sabotage ourselves?

[3:00] Some reasons for self-sabotage.

[6:30] Private rejection vs. public rejection.

[11:30] Failure and self-sabotage.

[17:30] As is our way, our mothers come up.

[19:00] Working hard and yet not succeeding.

[20:00] How do you stop self-sabotaging?

Computer Generated Transcript for ‘A Bipolar and a Schizophrenic Talk Self-Sabotage’ Show

Editor’s Note: Please be mindful that this transcript has been computer generated and therefore may contain inaccuracies and grammar errors. Thank you.

Narrator: [00:00:09] For reasons that utterly escapes everyone involved. You’re listening to a Bipolar, A Schizophrenic and A Podcast. Here are your hosts Gabe Howard and Michelle Hammer.

Gabe: [00:00:21] Welcome to A Bipolar, A Schizophrenic, And A Podcast. My name is Gabe Howard and I’m bipolar.

Michelle: [00:00:23] I’m Michelle Hammer and I’m schizophrenic.

Gabe: [00:00:26] And together we have a podcast.

Michelle: [00:00:27] That’s right we do it’s such a good one I love it so much.

Gabe: [00:00:31] I think that it is the very best podcast for mentally ill people by mentally ill people.

Michelle: [00:00:36] Me too I agree with that completely wholeheartedly.

Gabe: [00:00:38] I can’t really think of another one but I’ve noticed that since our podcast started to get popular people started showing up and saying “well I’m mentally ill and my podcast is for mentally ill people.”

Gabe: [00:00:49] And but I don’t think that’s true I think that they do live with mental illness, but I think they just had a podcast and hoped to gain an audience. Whereas we were like yes we need to create content for our community.

Michelle: [00:01:02] Our community is just underserved.

Gabe: [00:01:04] It is it’s incredibly under served. This is what I love about podcasting because it’s like such a niche thing. You know the mental health community and people who live with mental illness we are small which is good because you know thank god like everybody is not living with mental illness that would be terrible. So you know we’re never gonna be like on NBC at 8 o’clock. I mean that that’s where you get programming that appeals to like the mass markets and mass audience. So the nice thing about podcasts is we can have that little niche market. I mean some mentally ill people targeting a small group and that’s that’s why we exist. But it is sad because really we should be like super famous.

Michelle: [00:01:43] Oh yeah totally. If on self-sabotage it.

Gabe: [00:01:47] Exactly. And we have done this to ourselves with this very show on numerous occasions.

Gabe: [00:01:54] Many many many many many. Remember the time that you quit the show because you refused to talk to me for like an entire day.

Michelle: [00:02:02] When did that happen?

Gabe: [00:02:04] It happened you know like several months ago when we were at Olive Garden. You were just like I’m not making eye contact. I hope you die.

Michelle: [00:02:11] Yeah yeah I can remember that.

Gabe: [00:02:12] It was but it was incredibly awkward and we were talking about ways to make the podcast better and you got all all all all what did you get.

Michelle: [00:02:22] Quiet.

Gabe: [00:02:20] I believe but hurt is the term we’re looking for.

Michelle: [00:02:25] If you insist because you were being a dick.

Gabe: [00:02:27] How?

Michelle: [00:02:26] You said yeah this sucks and that sucks and you suck and everything’s OK.

Gabe: [00:02:34] Really. I said you suck.

Michelle: [00:02:35] Pretty much.

Gabe: [00:02:38] Ah and there is the key word when it comes to self-sabotaging behavior. It’s when we believe things to be true because they’re basically true like what you just said Michelle. You basically said you suck.

Michelle: [00:02:51] That’s not self-sabotaging behavior.

Gabe: [00:02:51] But did I actually say you suck?

Michelle: [00:02:59] Pretty much.

Gabe: [00:02:59] No not pretty much. Did the words “Michelle Hammer sucks” comes out of Gabe’s mouth.

Michelle: [00:03:05] Yes.

Gabe: [00:03:05] Liar liar liar. Now you know I’m gonna quit on the air.

Gabe: [00:03:10] Fine I resign in protest.

Narrator: [00:03:12] You’ve been listening to a schizophrenic and a podcast.

Michelle: [00:03:15] Number one reason number one for self-sabotage is when you feel like you don’t deserve to be successful. Have you ever felt like you don’t deserve to be successful? Oh, you’re gonna sit there Gabe. You just sit there and not even say anything.

Gabe: [00:03:31] You fired me.

Gabe: [00:03:33] The only reason I’m here is because we’re in my house.

Michelle: [00:03:35] Well do you see that I self sabotage this podcast.

Gabe: [00:03:42] I don’t think that your self sabotaging the podcast. I think you’re self-sabotaging yourself. Because as you pointed out in number one I think you are afraid of success.

Michelle: [00:03:51] You think so.

Gabe: [00:03:52] Yes.

Michelle: [00:03:54] Well it’s very interesting to point out because it seems like one of the biggest things about self-sabotage is the fear of trying one’s best and not succeeding.

Gabe: [00:04:04] Do you feel that you try your best.

Michelle: [00:04:07] Yes.

Gabe: [00:04:07] And when you try your best do you feel that you always succeed.

Michelle: [00:04:10] No.

Gabe: [00:04:11] And are you okay with that.

Michelle: [00:04:13] I mean it’s frustrating.

Gabe: [00:04:14] Well sure nobody said it can’t be frustrating.

Gabe: [00:04:17] I think a lot of people don’t think that they’re self-sabotaging because they think oh they’re protecting themselves or they’re giving it enough effort to work. But really self-sabotage behavior is kind of twofold. It’s one not giving something 110 percent because you think oh what’s the point it’s just going to fail anyway. And two when you get close to that success it’s also doing things like showing up late, or showing up unprepared, or to use a sports analogy, going out late the night before and eating a bunch of pizza.

Michelle: [00:04:48] I would agree with that.

Gabe: [00:04:49] Have you ever done that like before a lacrosse game like just gone out like drinking the night before.

Michelle: [00:04:54] No. We had rules.

Gabe: [00:04:55] Well but disobeying those rules would be a way of sabotaging yourself. You’d be sabotaging your success and then if you lose you can say oh I’m still the best lacrosse player. The only reason I lost is because I was drunk.

Michelle: [00:05:06] That would be really really ridiculous. And my whole team would be really really mad at me I wouldn’t do that.

Gabe: [00:05:12] So you care when your team is mad at you when you’re working on a project. Like, say a lacrosse game or a podcast.

Michelle: [00:05:20] Mm hmm. Another one. I was thinking about self-sabotage which I noticed that I did do was I looking up and said: “once in a while we self-sabotage simply to push buttons.” “We pick a fight and we incite drama to get a rush.” I would pick so many fights with my coach, so many fights. It was ridiculous. She once said to me “that she wished that I was bad at lacrosse so she could just cut me from the team.”

Gabe: [00:05:49] So you’re saying that when you respect somebody and look up to them you push their buttons so that a fight can ensue and you can not talk to them at Olive Garden.

Michelle: [00:05:58] Apparently.

Gabe: [00:06:01] That’s what I’m hearing.

Michelle: [00:06:02] I don’t know how you’re hearing that. How did we get to Olive Garden?

Gabe: [00:06:05] I guess you hurt my feelings.

Michelle: [00:06:06] You are my feelings.

Gabe: [00:06:07] You hurt my feelings.

Gabe: [00:06:08] My feelings were the most hurt.

Michelle: [00:06:10] My feelings were more hurt. Why do you think I wasn’t talking to you.

Michelle: [00:06:14] Back to self-sabotage. “It feels better to control your own failure. Then to let it blindside you.” So are you used to rejection?

Gabe: [00:06:26] I’m not. Every time I get rejected it hurts. Now I have developed some coping skills. Let’s talk about the difference between our reactions publicly and our reactions privately. And here’s why I want to touch on this. I don’t handle rejection well when people reject me. It really hurts my feelings and I get upset. I eat ice cream. I refuse to leave the house for a day. I get really really sad. My feelings get hurt. All of those things are true every single time I’ve ever lost an award a contest a contract. Anytime somebody went with a different speaker over me or a sponsor didn’t re-up whatever. I get hurt almost every single time.

Gabe: [00:07:07] But I handle it privately.

Gabe: [00:07:09] You know all joking aside to everybody Michelle was actually really good at this because I’ll wright Michelle and I’ll be like Oh my God our stats dropped and Michelle’s like “oh well we’ll get them next week” and then I don’t post on Facebook oh everybody hates us our stats dropped. And I think that’s what’s important to understand. I think that all of us are probably kind of prone to beat ourselves up privately. What I want to talk about are the people that do it publicly. We all know those people that every single time they fail or get rejected they just smear it everywhere. It’s all over social media. It’s all they talk about when you get together. They call up people and yell at them. They pick fights with their boyfriends and girlfriends just they can just never be happy because of a single rejection.

Gabe: [00:07:50] And they do it publicly. And I personally think it makes them look stupid.

Michelle: [00:07:54] I mean, I cannot stand passive aggressive Facebook statuses.

Gabe: [00:08:02] Like give me an example of one.

Michelle: [00:08:04] “One day somebody will care about me as much as I care about them.”

Gabe: [00:08:13] That’s a big one.

Michelle: [00:08:14] Yeah and obviously directed towards a person.

Gabe: [00:08:18] Yeah. That is an excellent point.

Gabe: [00:08:21] The other one is, “if you don’t see my value you’ll see me walk away.”

Michelle: [00:08:25] Or there’s the classic “don’t make someone a priority when you are just some afterthought” an afterthought or whatever it is.

Gabe: [00:08:35] Yeah it’s true.

Gabe: [00:08:36] I have seen all of these Facebook statuses on your Facebook wall.

Michelle: [00:08:39] I have never once posted a Facebook status like that.

Gabe: [00:08:43] I completely agree. You have not.

Gabe: [00:08:45] And I respect that about you and that is the thing that is really that is the professional part of our relationship as we do talk a lot about things that go on behind the scenes. But you know the olive garden thing happened literally months ago and we’re talking about it now in jest and to be funny and because it did happen and because the show relies on like real stories of our lives and problems that we have had. But I’d like to point out that the whole time that you refused to make eye contact or speak with me you weren’t like on Facebook like if he doesn’t realize that I’m half of this podcast that he can suck it.

Michelle: [00:09:20] Exactly.

Gabe: [00:09:22] Everybody would like I wonder who that’s geared at. Let’s see if she has one podcast. One co-host might be Gabe.

Michelle: [00:09:27] Might be who could she be talking about. This ginger haired man is a ginger-haired man.

Gabe: [00:09:38] Wow.

Michelle: [00:09:39] This Ginger head man being mean to me right now and I don’t like him a lot.

Gabe: [00:09:42] You know it’s mean to make fun of somebody’s physical characteristics. Big Nose.

Gabe: [00:09:49] I would never do something like that. Frizzy hair.

Gabe: [00:09:54] We’re gonna step away to hear from our sponsor and hopefully when we come back we’ll get back on track.

Narrator: [00:09:58] This episode is sponsored by betterhelp.com secure convenient and affordable online counseling. All counselors are licensed accredited professionals. Anything you share is confidential. Schedule secure video or phone sessions plus chat and text with your therapist whenever you feel it’s needed. A month of online therapy often costs less than a single traditional face to face session. Go to betterhelp.com/PsychCentral and experience 7 days of free therapy to see if online counseling is right for you. Betterhelp.com/PsychCentral.

Michelle: [00:10:30] Back to self-sabotage.

Michelle: [00:10:32] There’s also “perceived fraudulence and when you do something that raises your public profile you kind of feel like you only have further to fall.” I have suffered from this in my life because one day I think I realized that I have this online persona. People think I’m a cool person. I guess I don’t really think I’m that cool but maybe one day I kind of think what if people think I’m not cool and then everybody realizes I’m a big loser and nobody likes me anymore.

Gabe: [00:10:59] First off I sincerely doubt that you think you’re not cool. That’s that’s just the I’m going to call bullshit on that. You think that you are a badass. In fairness you are. You’ve accomplished quite a lot and you deserve the confidence that you have. But I think that what you are trying to explain is that you’re worried that even though you think you’re a good person and a cool person and you are capable you’re worried that people will think that you’re a fraud. And the reason that they will think you’re a fraud is because eventually, you’re going to fail. Eventually, you’re gonna have a project that doesn’t work and you’ve had projects that haven’t worked. Michelle, you pop up in New York City which is very very difficult.

Gabe: [00:11:40] I want to give you full props a lot of people think that you just sell this stuff online and the relative safety of your own home. But actually, you go out on the streets of New York City and sell your wares very publicly right?

Michelle: [00:11:53] Mm hmm.

Gabe: [00:11:55] Every time you go do you sell the same amount. Oh no. So that means that sometimes your sales are successful and profitable and sometimes even though you’re selling the exact same stuff and you’re the exact same person sometimes you lose money and you spend the whole day like for negative dollars.

Michelle: [00:12:13] That has happened. Yes yes.

Gabe: [00:12:17] Failure.

Michelle: [00:12:17] That’s how I started. I started in a deficit but now it’s getting way better with the connections that I’ve made through other places where I can pop up now in better spots for less of a price. Because when you do pop up in New York City unless you have a permit you have to pay to be at a pop-up shop in a certain place. So if you don’t make over the amount of money that you’ve paid to have your place you then lose money but then there’s also sales and then there’s revenue. Did you make more in your revenue that you’ve actually paid?

Gabe: [00:12:51] Are you explaining business to our listeners like we just became a business podcast. So we’re like Forbes for mentally ill people. Thank you Michelle for explaining business economics to our listeners.

Michelle: [00:13:05] I’ve done days where I’ve sold one shirt. I’ve done days where I’ve sold 30 shirts.

Gabe: [00:13:10] What’s the most shirts you’ve ever sold in one day?

Michelle: [00:13:15] About 30.

Gabe: [00:13:16] And what is the least number of shirts you’ve ever sold?

Michelle: [00:13:17] One.

Gabe: [00:13:18] So that that’s a world of difference.

Michelle: [00:13:21] So yes.

Gabe: [00:13:22] So even in your manufacturing enterprise it is wildly successful. I mean it really is you are. You are very successful as a designer and seller of clothes correct?

Michelle: [00:13:36] Yes.

Gabe: [00:13:37] But all days aren’t equal. So I think that sometimes people don’t look at the whole. And you know our show, for example, every single time we have an episode that goes poorly. What do I do?

Michelle: [00:13:50] You get upset.

Gabe: [00:13:51] And who do I call.

Michelle: [00:13:52] Me.

Gabe: [00:13:53] And what do you say.

Michelle: [00:13:54] Next time will be better.

Gabe: [00:13:55] Yes.

Gabe: [00:13:56] And you point out that our stats for the entire month are always great. But yeah you’ve got to have an episode that’s the worst one in a month. You’ve got to have an episode that’s the best one. They’re not all gonna be uniform. That’s impossible but it is mathematically impossible. Some shows are gonna do better than others. You always say it like that New York accent and usually mocking me. But that is the pep talk that you give me every single time. But I always tell you no no no. This is proof that people are losing interest and that it’s no longer good. And I start to just devolve very quickly into “Oh it’s gonna be over soon” and every month your right.

Michelle: [00:14:31] It goes back up.

Michelle: [00:14:33] Does those do you always try to find a scapegoat of why it failed.

Gabe: [00:14:39] I don’t try to find a scapegoat of why it fails because I do always try to find a scapegoat and I always think that it’s me and by extension of it being me I think it’s you.

Gabe: [00:14:52] So I always think it’s us because the show is just us. I don’t know that that’s a bad way to look at it though.

Gabe: [00:14:59] I mean if I’m being completely honest with myself I do take credit for the success of the show. We take credit for the success of the show and I feel very strongly that if you’re gonna take credit for something you need to take the negative. If you’re going to pat yourself on the back when you’re successful you need to take the blame for failure. And I just I really really detest people that want all the credit when things go well but they’re nowhere to be found when things go poorly.

Gabe: [00:15:28] I don’t like people like that. I don’t. I think that it’s that’s irresponsible. I will be standing at the finish line whether we win or whether we lose.

Michelle: [00:15:35] And I just believe that.

Michelle: [00:15:36] There is no I in team.

Gabe: [00:15:39] Yeah but there’s a me and an at.

Michelle: [00:15:43] What.

Gabe: [00:15:43] And meet. And a meta.

Michelle: [00:15:46] What is that supposed to mean?

Gabe: [00:15:48] Gabe is very meta.

Michelle: [00:15:50] I don’t like that word.

Gabe: [00:15:51] You don’t like meta. What is it like meta. Like a box of boxes is very meta or putting spectrums on a spectrum is very meta.

Michelle: [00:16:00] I don’t know what you’re talking about right now you’re just sabotaging this podcast.

Gabe: [00:16:04] That’s very true. Do you think that it is a form of self-sabotage. Anytime I ask you like a very personal question and instead of answering it you deflect onto something else.

Michelle: [00:16:14] I don’t think that’s sabotage. I just think that’s ignoring you.

Gabe: [00:16:18] No I’m I’m being serious.

Gabe: [00:16:20] Like for example right there it’s just you were really snarky I’m just ignoring you why. Really that’s why I’m being sincere that that’s what you want the audience to think that if Gabe asked you a question that you don’t like you just flat out ignore him. Isn’t it very passive aggressive you don’t you don’t say no thank you. You don’t change the subject you know what I mean you’re just I’m just ignoring you dick. I’m like your business.

Michelle: [00:16:41] What questions are you asking me that I’m not answering?

Gabe: [00:16:43] Do you love your mother?

Michelle: [00:16:45] Of course.

Gabe: [00:16:47] I wish we had video right now.

Gabe: [00:16:54] I actually know that you are very very fond of your mother but whenever I ask the question you always get like like I swear to God like your face turns red and some horns pop up and you’re like yes I do.

Michelle: [00:17:13] Do you love your mother?

Gabe: [00:17:14] Damn skippy she brought me into this world.

Gabe: [00:17:18] She makes me Turkey she makes those little Hershey Kiss cookies that I like but not the apple cookies that I like. She made them one year nobody liked them but me. So she’ll never make them again. That bitch I know and now she claims that she lost the recipe in the world of Google. How do you lose a recipe?

Michelle: [00:17:39] You know she’s lying to you. I think she is 100 percent. She is sabotaging Thanksgiving.

Gabe: [00:17:48] Don’t say that. Thanksgiving is way over.

Michelle: [00:17:49] Oh she is sabotaging your happiness. She is. I think that she is sabotaging my happy. You know what you could you Gabe you could just make those Apple cookies.

Gabe: [00:18:00] That is actually an excellent example right now I am upset that last Christmas my mother did not make me the cookies and I blamed her for not finding the recipe. And I blamed her for not using google to find the recipe but I am capable of finding the recipe for her and she’d probably make them. I’m capable of finding the recipe and making them myself. I’m capable of going to a bakery and just buying the damn things but instead I am sabotaging the relationship that I have with my mother by continuing to complain about something that is easily wrecked a fireball because in my mind it’s easier to be pissed off and angry and put upon than to just solve the damn problem.

Michelle: [00:18:41] Did you self sabotage when you were younger.

Gabe: [00:18:43] Yes. And I think that everybody does when they’re younger because we don’t understand the consequences yet. Hard work is hard work and working hard to get nothing is just the ultimate in depressing. It really is. We’ll go back to the sports analogy. You know how everybody says there’s no second place there’s just the first loser. I mean look. Being the second best at something in the entire world is a pretty good place to be. But I understand it.

Michelle: [00:19:10] You worked so hard and so long and you gave it everything you had and it didn’t matter.

Gabe: [00:19:19] Somebody was better than you.

Gabe: [00:19:21] My God that is devastatingly awful but I try to remember that if I didn’t give it 100% and I come in second that means if I would’ve come in first. So the whole reason I’m not standing on top of the pile is because I half-assed it and I think that’s worse in my mind self sabotaging is worse.

Gabe: [00:19:44] It’s why I put in way too much effort into any everything. You know how many people make fun of us for how much effort we put into our little podcast.

Michelle: [00:19:52] People make fun of us?

Gabe: [00:19:53] They make fun of us constantly.

Gabe: [00:19:55] Remember when we started and somebody said you will never find a sponsor ever.

Michelle: [00:19:59] Who said that?

Gabe: [00:20:00] Yeah we’re not going to out people on the show.

Michelle: [00:20:03] But well you know what they can do. Yeah.

Gabe: [00:20:08] You know they can do Michelle when you told your family that you were going to start a podcast did they ever think that it would be a money-making enterprise.

Michelle: [00:20:15] Oh absolutely not.

Gabe: [00:20:16] Yeah yeah. And is it a moneymaking enterprise.

Michelle: [00:20:19] I’m making millions.

Gabe: [00:20:21] OK. No. Now you’re just lying.

Gabe: [00:20:23] Yeah. Now exaggeration and grandiosity is going to be next week’s show.

Gabe: [00:20:29] Michelle tie this together in a bow. Why do people self-sabotage and how do we get them to stop.

Michelle: [00:20:34] I think people are just afraid of doing well because they’re afraid to fail. You’re afraid of failing then you’re just going to mess everything up when you’re doing well in high school. I was undiagnosed schizophrenic. I also had ADHD. They didn’t know about I was really bad at reading books because I had I just couldn’t concentrate on any of the books. So instead of handing in an essay that was going to be awful I just wouldn’t hand in an essay because I didn’t want the teacher to see how stupid I was. So that’s just self-sabotage right there.

Michelle: [00:21:08] I’d rather get a zero than let the teacher know that I couldn’t write because I was dumb.

Gabe: [00:21:13] You’d rather fail because you didn’t try than fail because you’re not good enough.

Michelle: [00:21:19] Exactly.

Gabe: [00:21:21] But you deprived yourself of the opportunity to get better and possibly succeed.

Michelle: [00:21:26] Well I realized this now but I did not realize this then.

Gabe: [00:21:29] But somebody did realize it for you right.

Gabe: [00:21:32] Your parents the teacher I mean somebody corrected this you are a woman who knows how to read and graduated from college and you are quite successful. So I refuse to believe that you went through your entire school career doing no homework turning nothing in and getting all zeros. So somebody fixed this.

Michelle: [00:21:47] I do the easy stuff. I mean I could read the short books but if you put a gigantic book in front of me and tell me to read it I’m going to have a panic attack.

Gabe: [00:21:55] What if I take a gigantic book and I cut it into like four hundred little books. Then could you read it.

Michelle: [00:22:01] No. I read a book and I constantly check how many pages I have left.

Gabe: [00:22:08] How does that help?

Michelle: [00:22:08] It doesn’t get I just get so overwhelmed when I’m reading books.

Gabe: [00:22:14] Still.

Michelle: [00:22:15] Yes.

Gabe: [00:22:16] How do you make it through college?

Michelle: [00:22:16] I was an art major Gabe.

Gabe: [00:22:20] That’s fair. I forgot. The only thing lower than an art major.

Michelle: [00:22:25] A gym teacher.

Gabe: [00:22:27] No. Somebody who plays sports.

Michelle: [00:22:32] You know sports is not a major.

Gabe: [00:22:33] Isn’t it.

Michelle: [00:22:35] It’s not.

Gabe: [00:22:36] Isn’t it.

Michelle: [00:22:36] It’s you can’t graduate with a sports degree.

Gabe: [00:22:39] What about all those all those college football players where do they end up.

Michelle: [00:22:44] To conclude Gabe stop being afraid of success.

Michelle: [00:22:49] Don’t be afraid to fail, strive for the stars because if you fall at least you land on the treetops. A soccer coach used to tell me that over and over again.

Michelle: [00:23:02] And that’s why you switched to lacrosse.

Michelle: [00:23:05] Yes.

Gabe: [00:23:07] Thank you, everybody, for tuning into this week’s episode of a bipolar schizophrenic and a podcast. My name is Gabe Howard and with me as always is Michelle Hammer. Remember you can head over to store.PsychCentral.com and buy the official define normal shirt which supports the show. Send us your topic ideas to [email protected]. Remember to leave a comment.

Gabe: [00:23:34] Everywhere you see these comments really really help us leave us a five-star review. Pass this on to your friend. Don’t let our show die otherwise. Michelle and I will just continue to fight.

Narrator: [00:23:51] You’ve been listening to a bipolar schizophrenic podcast. If you love this episode don’t keep it to yourself head over to eye tunes or your preferred podcast app to subscribe rate and review. To work with Gabe go to GabeHoward.com. To Work with Michelle go to Schizophrenic.NYC. For free mental health resources and online support groups. Head over to PsychCentral.com. Show’s official Website PsychCentral.com/BSP you can e-mail us a [email protected]. Thank you for listening and share widely.

Meet Your Bipolar and Schizophrenic Hosts

GABE HOWARD was formally diagnosed with bipolar and anxiety disorders after being committed to a psychiatric hospital in 2003. Now in recovery, Gabe is a prominent mental health activist and host of the award-winning Psych Central Show podcast. He is also an award-winning writer and speaker, traveling nationally to share the humorous, yet educational, story of his bipolar life. To work with Gabe, visit gabehoward.com.

  MICHELLE HAMMER was officially diagnosed with schizophrenia at age 22, but incorrectly diagnosed with bipolar disorder at 18. Michelle is an award-winning mental health advocate who has been featured in press all over the world. In May 2015, Michelle founded the company Schizophrenic.NYC, a mental health clothing line, with the mission of reducing stigma by starting conversations about mental health. She is a firm believer that confidence can get you anywhere. To work with Michelle, visit Schizophrenic.NYC.

from World of Psychology http://bit.ly/2Cnw4qT via IFTTT

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Fort Wayne Indiana Cheap car insurance quotes zip 46835

"Fort Wayne Indiana Cheap car insurance quotes zip 46835

Fort Wayne Indiana Cheap car insurance quotes zip 46835

BEST ANSWER:  Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://financeandcreditsolution.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr 

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""18, needs car insurance for ANYTHING please help ?""

OK ah cant take anymore of this... i'm 18 have had a license for 3 months now and live in the UK jarrow, tyne and Wear... All i want is a **** little car. But the insurance is ***** ridiculus no matter what i do a car costing 300 insurance will still be 5000 - 6000 doesn't matter if the engine is the size of a vacuume cleaner motor it jus wont go down. PLEASE somebody find me a car that isn't over 2000 that the insurance wont be beyond a joke. Been at this for over a week now and cant find anything. gocompare money supermarket direct line aviva. even put my mother as the main driver of the car with me as additional driver and still 5000 - 6000. Even insurance fraud is expensive PLEASE help me""

Would my car insurance price go up?

I got 2 speeding tickets in a matter of 5 months. 1 in May and 1 in the beginning of October. In California, you're not eligible to take traffic school for 18 months when you complete it. Would this not being eligible to take traffic school increase my car insurance price?""

Liability Insurance?

I only have liability insurance and I was told by a friend they don't cover accidents. even if its not your fault. now that sounds like b.s I was involved in a wreck today and it was NOT my fault. what do i get. and also what other benefits do you get with insurances. not benefits but like. what willt hey cover or not cover

Should I purchase life insurance for my child?

Should I purchase life insurance for my child?

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my stepson just got his learner's permit, he may be driving my husband's truck once in a while to learn, (I think he'll be driving mostly when he's at his mom's house), a mile here and a mile there. We have geico insurance, do we need to add him temporarily? i tried to look at our coverage and get a quote, but it won't let me without actually adding him as a driver. i'm not about to add him without a quote since he's only 16... way too young to be driving in my opinion, but that's another issue...""

What FAST car can i get for under 20k and has a low insurance rate?

k my dad says i can get any car as long as he agrees to the insurance prices. he knows most of all the cheap fast cars you can get all turn expensive in the insurance. could you help me out? fast, cheap, low insurance. thanks""

Why should teenagers have to pay so much on insurance for a BRZ or FRS?

What just because it looks like a sports car it is?? Since 2007 teenagers have been disapointed that they can't get a subaru WRX or STI because of the turbo charger and now that they've made a two door without turbo it's STILL off limits for teens?? It's FOUR cyclinders. Give us a break. All you old farts drove muscle cars when you were our age.

Why is it illegal to drive without car insurance?

I have heard rumors that it is illegal to drive without car insurance; first of all, is this true? Secondly, if this is so, why? Many individual American motorists experience between 0-2 minor accidents in their lifetime, some of which are very minor (where both cars still run fine and there's just a bump or so). Any information would be useful.""

What is the best medical insurance for already pregnant woman?

I have to purchase my own health insurance because I left my job recently only to discover that my small group aka my employer doesn't cover COBRA, when you leave voluntarily. At the time we had a makeshift HR dept. so I can't really blame them for not knowing...anyway , now I have to seek out my own insurance and I want to know what is the best plan out there since I am coming out of pocket. I can't have OB care until I get this. Please don't judge me I was a working executive assistant for a small company and decided to leave to pursue my dreams and get out of the rut of a comfortable job without a future! Help, thank you!""

18 yr old Car Insurance Advice?

I recently moved out of my parents home due to family issues. Im 18 yrs old and need car insurance but can no longer get it through my parents which made it much cheaper. Im wondering what my best options are.

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Are you in favor of getting rid of health insurance for people with pre-existing conditions?

Are you in favor of getting rid of health insurance for people with pre-existing conditions?

Cheap car insurance for new drivers??

does anybody know where i can get the cheapest car insurance for a Peugeot 106 1.1 im 17 and should pass my test by November, thanks.""

Should I continue to pay my car insurance?

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Are there any cost savings in adding an additional driver to car insurance vs having 2 policies?

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""Do You have To pay A Brokers Fee, When They Find U Car Insurance?""

I know some one who payed a huge brokers fee, when they found car insurance for her. Are all broker fee expensive. (finders fees).""

How much is insurance on a Chevy Camaro?

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Will traffic points on your permit affect your insurance when you get your license.?

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How much do you pay for car insurance?

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Fort Wayne Indiana Cheap car insurance quotes zip 46835

Fort Wayne Indiana Cheap car insurance quotes zip 46835

""Can I be added to my moms auto insurance, and drive my own car?""

Is that possible be added to my moms auto insurance, and drive my own car?""

Should my roofer see my insurance estimate?

We are in the process of getting our roof replaced through insurance. We have a roofer who said he would do the work and we got the check from insurance in the bank. The roofer never gave us an exact estimate, just that he would do it for whatever insurance is going to pay. Now the roofer wants to see the detailed insurance estimate... Is that standard practice?""

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How much will insurance offer for a car I paid 3000 for 6 months ago?

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Does a full license reduce insurance premiums over a provisional license(NOT learners permit)?

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i am considering non-owners insurance for a car. however, if i drive my friend's car, their insurance policy will cover me. 1) what is the point of getting non-owners insurance, if non-owners insurance already assumes that i don't have frequent access to a car, and my friend's policy will cover me, also assuming i don't have frequent access to his car? also, i know, in the case of an at-fault accident with my friend's car, and assuming i have non-owners insurance, my friend's insurance will kick in first, then my non-owners insurance will cover what's missing. 2) what's the point of non-owner's, if my friend's limits are high enough already? 3) won't my friend's insurance increase since his insurance company had to pay? 4) if my friend's insurance increases, then what does the non-owner's insurance cover/protect??""

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hi i recieved a BMW compact 02 plate car as a gift, and i was really happy but now im really upset because i cannot find any cheap car insurance, i quote all the time and the lowest price i get is 5200 for a year and monthly instalments of 468, i wonder where in their brain do they they think i can pay that every month, i work and pay my rent, sky, internet, gas, tax, credit card etc. what must i do i cant afford to pay 468 more on bills. can you please give me websites which can help, and please dont leave any rude comments because i really cant be bothered for u wasting your time , THANK YOU""

Is auto insurance cheaper for trucks?

I have a turbocharged hatchback now, thinking about upgrading to a larger vehicle.""

How much would insurance cost?

i was looking to get a suzuki GZ250 motorcycle. i am 18 years old, and i have taken a drivers ed course and the motorcycle driving course. i was wondering about how much insurance would be. it has 249 cc""

Question regarding auto insurance claim?

Recently, our car got pummeled by a hailstorm. We went to a bodyshop prior to the meeting with the damage adjuster (which is today), and was told by the tech that our car would require both conventional and PDR repair. However, the estimate report was written up today for PDR repair only. Does that mean I'm limiting to PDR repair only? Or can the bodyshop challenges the insurance company's estimate and go for the conventional & PDR repair?""

""On buying a new car, should I get insurance for it immedliately?""

I am buying a new car in a day or so. Am I legally required to get insurance before I take it out of the dealership? I heard that dealer should keep insurance for 1 month. Is that true? If it is true, what is covered - just the car? Driver? Passengers? New-car buyer in Texas""

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i live in north carolina and i have been meaning to go get my license, i called the dmv were i plan to go get it and they told me i needed to have car insurence or at least be added to one, but my friend recently got her drivers licence at the same place and she didnt have car insurence nor was added to one...so im a little confused do i, or do i not have to have car insurence?""

How much would car insurance be for a 17 year old girl.?

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How much is too much for insurance?

Hello. i own a 300zx twin turbo, i have modified it my self with some stuff.. but thats not importent right now. my question is that the cheapest insurance i can get for it with full coverage is around 250 a month..Im willing to pay for it, just because i love everything about this car.. but to my self i think its far too much. im 19 years old, and i was wondering what kinda stuff brings down the amount i would have to pay for insurance? ( i got my license when i was 18, ive had it for about a year now) thanks.""

I was wondering how much insurance would cost for a 05 mustang gt im 14 and have my permit cause i live in SD?

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Help! im trying to find car insurance!?

help ! i am trying to find car insurance for a bog standard vaxhaull corsa and each time I have done a quote for TPFT the price is no less than 1800. I am 19 and have held a clean license for 1 year. Any suggestions? I am going in an hour to buy a car.

Fort Wayne Indiana Cheap car insurance quotes zip 46835

Fort Wayne Indiana Cheap car insurance quotes zip 46835

How much will insurance co pay us?

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iv just passed my test, and bought a citreon saxo 1.1, iv been on many comparison sites and the best quote i get is 3500 third party only which is way too much. Can anyone help me find a better quote Thanks""

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Before: carfax, test drive, mechanic check... anything else? After do i need to register it in my name to my state dmv within a certain amount of time? I talked to my insurance ...show more""

How much would insurance cost with a 2000 mustang convertible? HELP PLEASE!?

I'm a 16 yer old, and I have insurance with geico. I want to buy a 2000 ford mustang covertable. I was wonder if anyone knew about how much my familys insurance would go up. I realize I can call geico but my dad won't let me, ha. So any ideas? Thanks!""

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I am 17 and i have been saving money for a brand new car and i started looking for one and i found the one i want and so i decided to get a quote on the insurance for it and the quote as around 350 and the car payment quote was 200 i thought that this is a little ridicules myself and i cant afford insurance that high... So i was just wondering how old a vehicle needs to be before the insurance is way lower than what it would be if it was brand new!

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My record got explunged now that I am 18 in the state of California. Will my car insurance take me back?

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hi, i have been looking on ebay and i have found that i may want to buy a yamaha dt 125. i have been riding a speedfight 50 for a year and a half however i did buy a ajs 125 which by the way was a terable bike. i was wondering what the insurance usually costs for a dt 125, i have already changed my insurance once in the past 12 months to swap back from the ajs to my scooter (i blew the gear box) so that may effect it. thank you so much for any responce i get (PS sorry about the bad english, it all looks the same to me being dyslexic)""

Does anyone know where i can get cheap and affordable health insurance from in wisconsin?

Im looking for cheap or affordable health insurance ,, sure cant seem to find any .. does anyone have an answer""

What does 10-20-10 mean on auto. ins.?

What does 10-20-10 mean on auto. ins.?

I am in need of health insurance. Is there any kind out there affordable to a spouse of a D.A.V.?

My husband is rated 100% disabled with the U.S. government.

Will full coverage car insurance cover a blown head gasket?

It still has enough oil in it (between E and F on the dip stick), I can just tell this is what it is because Oil is leaking down the driver side gasket and I'm noticing my coolant level beginning to drop. I just want to do something about it now before I keep driving it and completely blow the engine.""

Will this affect my insurance cost?

I'm 22 and just received my 1st ticket today in 6 years of driving. I made an illegal turn, I turned left instead of the traditional right. I've never had a ticket before and especially one for such a minor infraction of the law. Will this affect my insurance rate?""

Who's insurance will be cheaper?

Someone with a DUI conviction(only one) OR someone who is in their 30's who hasnt had insurance for 18yrs?

Do you have to add your new teenage driver to AAA insurance if you want them covered.?

Do you have to add your new teenage driver to AAA insurance if you want them covered.?

""Is a motorcycle cheaper than a car in terms of maintenance, fuel and insurance?""

No matter what I get, my budget most likely will be $5000. But i'm talking about other costs like maintenance, fuel and insurance. I know fuel obviously is much less than a car for motorcycles, but how about maintenance and insurance? Basically i'm a highschool student, I'll be going to college next year, its a 50 km ride one way. Public transit would take me 2 hours...so If possible, i'd like to get a car or motorcycle. I already passed my first road test, but I don't have a motorcycle licence, but I'd like to. Infact the college i'm planning on attending does motorcycle courses and licencing. I'm thinking that If I do get a bike, i'd ride it for september- early november, store it for the winter, then spring till the end of the school year. Obviously I'd ride it during the summer too! I dunno, what do you experts think? You think its a good game plan or am I just in over my head? Which should I get?""

Car insurance Voluntary Excess?

hi just got a quote from a insurance broker for cars and i put down 100 Voluntary Excess but what does this mean?

Hey everyone quick question about my auto insurance.?

So I've been with TD insurance for 2 years now, I used to pay 208 last year and it went down 165, and this year it went 145, but I'm moving I called them when I told them my new postal code it went up 192.which is fine ,but my question is am I entitle to the discount I received from last year and this year on my new montly rate ? I got them because I had no vialation, or tickets nothing. Shouldn't I still be entitle on my new rate?""

Anyone have experience with Western and Southern life insurance co.?

I am looking to purchase term insurance

Will buying a previously wrecked car drive up my insurance?

Im a new driver and my parents want to buy me an Acura TSX. I found one online and went to test drive it and found out it had been in a moderate car crash, but had been completely fixed and repaired. I went to the mechanic and he ok'd the car for me. We want to buy it, but is the fact that the previous owner crashed it going to drive up the cost to insure it?""

""If u wrote-off a $5000 car, on average how much would ur insurance company give you back?""

If u wrote-off a $5000 car, on average how much would ur insurance company give you back?""

Your personal experiences with Progressive Auto insurance?

I just got a lease on a 2010 Honda Civic. Its the first car ever in my name and was a bit pricey for me b/c I don't have an extensive credit history. Progressive was the cheapest auto insurance I could find so I decided to try it. Any pros/cons you've experienced?

Car insurance confusion?

Ok, I'm 17 and I just moved to Florida with my 18-year-old boyfriend. He just got his license suspended so in a few days I'm going to get my first license here in Florida because I have a job to get to. (I've had my NC learner's permit for over a year) My question is basically, what are my options for car insurance? Can I have my own policy or is my only option to be put on his insurance? Please help!""

I have an old pickup truck but can't find a price to get an insurance quote.?

I'm working on a 1972 International model 1100 Eight pickup truck and can't seem to find a price for it in todays market. I've looked on every automotive web-site I can think of, but they have every make except International. I'm trying to get an insurance quote over the internet and I really need this. I paid $400 for the truck itself and about the same for new parts. The guy who owned this truck before me said it was originally a one ton pickup, but the bed was switched out with a three ton. I know I have to add the price of the new parts, but all I want is an approximate base price. I'll take any advice, web-site, or anything else relevant to my needs.""

Fort Wayne Indiana Cheap car insurance quotes zip 46835

Fort Wayne Indiana Cheap car insurance quotes zip 46835

G2 Insurance?

I'm working on getting my G2 license, but once I get it, will I have to get insurance? If I'm not driving, nobody would ever know that I don't have insurance, right? I want to have my license so that when I *can* afford insurance, I'll be able to drive.""

Whats a good price for auto insurance?

I'm a part-time employee that makes about 210-250$ a week. I drive about 50 mi. 4-5 days a week. I am trying to pay for tuition (3000 a quarter) and a cell phone bill as well (100 a month). I just want a rough estimate on what I should need. When I talk to a representative I feel like he wants to get the most out of me. When I try to pick out a quote myself, I tend to think of the worst cast scenario and opt for the better plans. My plans always come-out to be 220 a month. Is that high or just right? I just need a little guidance by my peers or by older folks that have been down this road before. Thank you very much.""

Which car insurance is good and cheap for a teen?

Well not so much a teen anymore im turning 20 in a few months.. but my car insurance is REALLY high..is it because i have a honda civic? or that im 19.. Should i try Geico? I dont know what to do. anybody know any cheap insurance companys?

Is this quote accurate for my car insurance?

Hi ; I'm planning to buy a 1994 Honda Civic.Yesterday , I checked insurancehotline.com to see how much my insurance will cost. I'm a new driver in Toronto-Canada but have 3 years out -of- country experience. The cheapest quote which was shown is 4900 cdn.Let's be realistic guys , the car is 1500 cdn.How come is the insurance that much.How much is the approximate quote for me?""

How much time do you have to get car insurance after buying a car?

I'm considering buying a car insurance, I've been driving for years but none of the cars have actually been in my name and my mom has me on her plan. If I buy a car I'll need insurance, how much time would I have to get it?""

Can there be two different auto insurances on the same car?

Im a new driver, im 17 and im in the state of illinois. I dont have a license yet, just a permit. My parents only have one car and i cannot afford my own at this time. My parents have allstate and their rates are too high for me. So i contacted another insurance agency and their rates for liability were lower. So, can one car be insured with two different insurances?""

If your insurance cancels and you reinsure the next day will you get hit with a penalty?

okay im with nationwide and theyre expensive so theyre canceling my insurance on 1/1/08 but i wont have the money to go to my new cheaper insurance until the next day so will i get hit with the 500 dmv fee??/

What do you do when he doesnt have car insurance?

I was in a car wreck two weeks ago. We thought he had safe auto to the police report which is a nightmare but which made it worst he has no insurance at all. He had been drinking early but did not blow enough to go to jail. What can be done about him driving without insurance and drinking

What car should I get for cheap insurance?

Im 18, i just got my license a week ago. I live in a small Louisiana town. I catch buses and taxis to and from college and work. I really need a car. I have 2000 down for one but insurance is like 600 dollars on my own policy. I can't get on any ones policy because I live on my own. I'm beginning to get discouraged because the longer I take to get a car the less money I'll have for a car paying 10 to 20 dollars on taxis a day takes all my money. What can I do? What cars will have the cheapest insurance for a new driver?""

What shold I do if I get into a car accident whith no one else involved but I totaled my car with no insurance?

I got into a car accident during a rainstorm, lost control and totaled my car. I still owe money on it and to make matters worse I found out my insurance lapsed. No one else was involved in it and I went to the hospital and didn't file a claim with the lien holder on the car yet. When I came back to the car it was gone. Don't know what to do next. Any answers out there for my predictament?""

Can you name a place in so. California where I can purchase minimum legal auto liability insurance?

I would be greatly obliged if you didn't limit your answer to something like contact your insurance agent . For one, I don't have one yet, that's part of the problem. I currently have neither a car nor insurance. For my first car, I want to buy a car from one of the many people selling their used cars in my metropolitan area. But without insurance, I cannot drive the car home or even test drive it. I would like to buy the minimum liability insurance that is required by California law BEFORE I choose and buy a car so that way I can go to nearby cities test driving cars, and drive back the one I buy. I have tried shopping online for insurance. I went to all the insurance companies that are on TV plus several others. I came across two issues 1) they base the insurance on what type of car you have, and I do not know which one I am going to get yet, 2) they want to sign me up for complete car and driver's insurance, even though they claim to let me customize my plans. I do not qualify for the state liability insurance for low income drivers. Can you specifically name a place where I can walk in and purchase only auto liability insurance?""

Car accident with no insurance?

I got into a car accident today and totaled my car. the other vehicle just had bumper damage. come to find out my insurance tried to take my payment out my account but were unsuccesfull so they canceled it a month ago. whats gonna happen since i am at fault and no insurance

What is a good car insurance company i should get?

I'm 18 turning 19 I live in NJ (i heard the prices vary where i live due to accidents and whatnot)

When can I get my auto insurance after applying for it?

Right now I am having G1 licence and bought a car. My G1 exit test is on June 5,2007. Can I apply as registered owner having G1 and add primary driver who's having G licence? How long will it take to get insurance? Also please provide cheap auto insurance provider's name. Thank you so much for your help. :-)""

On what type of a car would insurance be the cheapest and how much would it cost?

I'm a guy about to turn 16 and get my licencse, or about to get my permit first, and was wondering if anyone had an answer to my question.""

""Insurance estimate on Integra, Mustang?""

Hey. So I am getting my first car in a couple months, and my dad said I could choose which car, but keep it in a low price range. I've always liked Integras, since I was little, and I always wanted it to be my first car, so thats in consideration. And my dad said get a mustang. I would like to know how much insurance is on each? The cars would be- Acura Integra 1996-2001 (LS, RS, SE, GS) Under my dads name (age 50) I would be secondary driver Silver or black or white Roughly 150k miles Maybe 25 miles a day Would buy used around 2000$ - 4000$ Im aware its a luxury car, thus insurance being a tad more expensive How much would you think insurance would be? We have Progressive but I just want a estimate - Maybe like the average of how much people with integras pay for insurance. Mustang 2004 Under my dads name (age 50) I would be secondary driver Black or silver Maybe 100k miles 25 miles/ day Used around 4000$ - 5000$ Not luxury, but its a sports car, Im guessing insurance is more expensive for it""

Car insurance?

If i have bought a car but but the car is not insured, then can someone else who is fully comp drive my car?""

Does anyone know any cheap car insurance for 17 year olds in the UK?

Hi, I need some insurance for my Ford Fiesta 1999. I have been looking at some insurance qoutes but there still VERY expensive ( Around 6000-10000 ) I would love to get around 2000 for my car as i know its possible but i just need to find a insurer. Does anyone know any? Thanks""

I need help choosing a First car! Which would be best on insurance?

I'm getting my first car next year, and I have been talking with my parents about first cars. I've been searching online about some of the cars I like, insurance, and pricing. Here's some of the cars I like.- Which of these will be the best on insurance? If you could give me prices that would be awesome! ;] Scion tC (05) coupe. Dodge Charger (05) Acura TL (05) Honda Civic (05 coupe). Mitsubishi Eclipse 99-06 Nissan Murano 04 I like crossovers but I read somewhere that they are more expensive on insurance. My mom wants something safe, something thats not tiny, a Sedan, What are some other options that look good and aren't old. My budget is 8,000 - 10,000. All the cars I listed are in that price range. I like in Mississippi if that matters. Thanks to everyone that helps! ;]""

I need health insurance.how do i get it?

i live in albuquerque and i work part time so i dont have insurance.my tooth is starting to bother me and i think i really need to go to the dentist but i dont have insurance.how do i get one? please help :(

What color cars are cheaper to insure?

its bugging me lol. i would like to know what colors are considered aggressive like red,black ect. and what colors they wont rape you over. so a list of aggressive colors and a list of calm colors. thank you for your help!""

What is the average cost of life insurance?

I know individual circumstances apply, but there must be an average monthly cost somewhere. 33 years old, Looking for term life insurance, 500K I was just given a monthly quote for $28 per month""

Can you get cheaper car insurance when hiring from a car rental place?

Can you get cheaper car insurance when hiring from a car rental place?

""With the new Obamacare, how do I get insurance if I am 19?""

I was looking at the calculator for the new Obamacare (google Obamacare calculator) and I noticed that there is not an option for someone under 19 getting insurance for themselves...and I am still considered a child. My family does not have insurance but I despereately need it, and was just wondering how some like me, a full time student and 19 years old with a part time job, gets insurance...or am I not allowed to have insurance because I am 19? I have never been able to afford insurance before, but now will it be more affordable? Sorry, this Obamcare thing confuses me but if this is a chance for me to get insurance I want to know all I can about it! Bt so far all i can gather is you have to be 21 or over to get your own insurance. And please don't tell me to get a full time job and get company provided health care...someone has told me that on an answer before and I stuggle just having a part time job and going to school full time...a full time job is just not plausible right now and NO I am NOT LAZY thank you very much.""

Got into a car accident! ): Will my insurance go up?

I got into a car accident a few hours ago..I was turning in to park into a tight space, misjudged the space, and ended up hitting the rear of the car that was parked on the right (I scratched it slightly)...my car had a slight scratch on it too. I gave the guy my insurance info and all that...but im worried..ive been driving for 3 years and never had this happen before, the damages are minor but will my insurance go up? Im also getting my motorcycle license next summer, will the insurance for my motorcycle go up?""

Fort Wayne Indiana Cheap car insurance quotes zip 46835

Fort Wayne Indiana Cheap car insurance quotes zip 46835

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