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safely-in-vhagars-belly · 5 months

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Dark!Aemond x reader

Ashes Burn: chapter two

Aemond x fem oc/reader

Tags: Show setting, gore, blood, dubcon

🔷Summary: Your hometown will soon fall, and you become noticed by the one-eyed Kinslayer who lays siege to it.

🔷Author's note: Dark!Aemond is not something i throw around lightly. It is not something i take lightly as a warning. Just so you know. Some people sometimes click on dark aemond but they dont want dark aemond, and thats fine but this is dark dark aemond so i warn ya as my author, my job is to warn ya (((apparently))

🔷Wordcount :7939 (THAT CANT BE RIGHT THATS HUGE)

Warnings below the cut but mind your step!

Gore, abuse, kicking heads, dub-con, licking, fingering (f) orgasm denial, orgasm control, smut, spankings, pussy smacking, erections, blood, guards are terrified of aemond. Trauma. Dead family members. Normal hotd stuff, basically.

Did you miss part one? Catch up

or dont and jump right in.

Im not your parental figure.

im your wine aunt

You hold your brother's head above your own as you are paraded around town. Terrified villagers have been forced out of their homes and are forced to watch the parade of your brother's body. Aemond has placed you in front of him on the horse, his hands casually holding the reins of the horse and your belly that is filled with fear and anxiety.

You try to remain strong and brave but everyone knows when you are paraded around what will await you. Your ass still stings from where he hit you earlier. His intentions are clear as crystal and you fear you won't be a maiden for much longer.

You shake and tremble on the horse, muttering prayers you learned and messing them up in the process that is how fast you are muttering them.

People you have known all your life all rounded up and watch as you and the prince parade over a road of blood and corpses, him as the clear Victor of this battle.

You eventually reach your home, your arms hurt from holding the head. Aemond simply grabs your wrists, taking your brother's head from you. You can make out Karst's eyes and his wonderful features that remind you of your father.

He laughs as he throws your brother's head on the tiles outside of your home, in the courtyard. Aemond kicks it through a window inside, causing a disturbance and an uproar of terrified servants. He does not bother to collect you. For a moment there is hope.

You take the reins he abandoned, your ears pulsing with blood as you feel your heartbeat rise. Until a voice reminds you coldly that you are a prince's pet now. An object for the prince to entertain himself with. ‘’Please, my Lady. The prince shall punish you if dared to run. He will capture you, and so many innocents will die as punishment.’’ It is the Dornish commander.

You blink back tears.

‘’I don't care.’’ Yes, you do. You care and you care too much at that, sadly. But he made you taste your brother's blood. He has your family, yes. But they are not bastards. They are pure blooded and you know Aemond will kill you once you bore him.

The commander decides to risk his life by standing in front of the horse. ‘’Yes you do, my Lady. You have a good, gentle heart. Please get off the horse, I won't tell him. I promise.’’ You have to believe him. You have to trust he will keep his word. You lower yourself from the horse and follow the Dornish commander back inside your old house.

Already, you can see someone destroyed antique vases by the door. Two soldiers are busy slamming a chest and trying to break it. It is locked tightly and contains scrolls. You doubt they know that, however. For them it could contain riches, fame and money. No one, not a single commander, the Dornish one included, stops them from ramsacking your home.

You find Aemond sitting on a chair in the dining area, watching as terrified servants run around him. Some have dropped food and plates. ‘’Someone collect me my pet.’’ He orders. You know it is you who he speaks of.

He notices you and grins, straightening his back. ‘’Ah, there you are. I was just about to fetch you.’’ You refuse to meet his eye. He grins, letting you be rebellious. ‘’I like your home. It is quite poorly decorated but it fits you.’’ There is an insult there yet you do not dare to defend yourself.

The Dornish commander gently gives you a slight push so you stumble in the direction of the prince. Aemond puts the head of your brother on the table, crossing his own legs. ‘’You must think me a monster, feeding all those traitors to my dragon.’’ You agree but you know he will turn the tale around. He wants you to see it from his point of view.

You huff. ‘’They were no traitors. A traitor would have run.’’ And that is the truth. Karst was not a traitor. Diandra was not a traitor. Neither was your father or the men who followed him. They were heroes and loyal and fought for their home.

He gets up.

The prince grabs you suddenly by the hips, bringing your bodies closer to one another. His hot breath grazes over your cheeks as you feel blood rush to it. ‘’So she speaks, at long last. I was worried you had lost your tongue.’’ He mocks, you can tell he was never worried about your inability to speak ever again.

You put his hands from your hips.

‘’Only my appetite.’’ You remark. Aemond does not seem to hear you. His gaze is focused on Midy, your favourite kitchen maid. She is as always whistling and singing to herself when preparing food, even now where other servants are terrified or in hiding. She is a special soul, your father would say.

You worry for Midy, as you can see Aemond has clearly noticed her. ‘’You. You have a name, I presume?’’ Midy nods, turning around with a broad smile, while cutting a dead chicken to pieces. She even makes a little curtsy.

‘’Yes, my Lord. Midy my Lord.’’ You want to warn her but one glance from Aemond and you are silenced again. You know what is at stake. Her life. Perhaps even your own.

‘’You know this Lady?’’ He asks, gesturing vaguely at you. Midy nods, enthusiastically. Of course she knows you. You are the bastard of the Lord she served, and the only one of his daughters that had patience and kindness for servants.

Midy does not understand the danger she is in. She does not know that Aemond is not her friend. ‘’Lady Y/N my Lord of course I do! She is sweet and kind. She has been here since she was a baby.’’ She adds, with a smile, as if cherishing those good old days. ‘’It is high time someone would try to court her.’’ She really is too good for this world.

Courting. Not a conquering. A Courting. That would be fun. It would make Annalysa mad with rage and jealousy. This night would end with your stomach fluttering not filled with dread. Eryka would murder you. Karst would murder Aemond. It would be a fun and unrealistic scenario. Because why would Prince Aemond even entertain the thought of bothering with a marriage with you? He hates bastards.

You glance at Aemond who has trouble hiding his smirk at her description. You pull your nails as a single tear falls from your eye. Aemond will not court you. He talked about conquering you, making you his ‘pet’.

For a brief moment, you consider what would happen if you would tell Midy who Aemond really is, what he is really after and what he will really do. But one look at her kind brown loyal eyes and you know it won’t end well. She will perhaps attack Aemond in your defense, he will miraculously avoid, clearly favoured by the Seven damned gods themselves, and you will lose your friend for nothing. So, you remain silent. ‘’You know what my Lady likes?’’ He asks, as you silently cry.

The answer comes within mere moments as Midy thinks this an act of kindness. ‘’Strawberrycupcakes, lemoncakes, pastries and cakes, my lord. Although, she is not allowed much of the Lord of the house. His ladybitch took care of that.’’ Midy murmurs, acting too familiar with Aemond, who laughs, amused by this knowledge.

‘’Midy, be kind.’’ You warn her. ‘’She does her best.’’ Lady Fyona is not the kindest to you, but she is not as horrible as her two daughters. She at least tries to tolerate you.

‘’Arrange something delicious for her and me.’’ Prince Aemond interrupts you sharply. ‘’I wish to try your delicious cooking and to feed my pet.’’ Finally Midy understands.

The blood leaves her face likely and she looks at Aemond as if he is the Stranger himself, here to collect her. ‘’Y-You're not here to court-’’ She knows now.

Aemond grins and you know he must enjoy her fear.

‘’No. I'm here to conquer. Which I did, but now I'm hungry.’’ He gestures to the kitchen as if to send her away. She obeys and leaves him instantly.

The prince turns his head to you.

‘’I have no use for you if you were to faint. When was the last time you ate, if at all?’’ He asks, taking in your trembling hands and roaring stomach.

You had a bowl of soup yesterday.

‘’Last night during supper.’’ You try to quiet your stomach.

The prince looks out the window, to where his horse is peacefully eating outside. ‘’Supper? It's almost dark again.’’ You can tell.

You stumble, leaning for support on the table where your family used to dine at. ‘’Sit with me.’’ He orders you. ‘’Sit down, and get something inside that stomach.’’ You aren't sure how to. You aren't hungry ever since he killed all those people. All the heads he cut, the corpses he burned with his dragon. It is too much for you.

And you can't sit down. Not at that table. You aren't allowed to. You are a dirty bastard to sit at your family's table would be treason and your stepmother has hit you enough in the past for it. Aemond thinks however you are insulting him. ‘’What is it?’’ You have trouble explaining it. It is embarrassing.

Yet you know you must explain it.

‘’I'm a bastard. I'm supposed to eat away from the family table.’’ You tell him, your voice timid.

He chuckles. A few men join in as you stare at your feet. ‘’Did your daddy not like it when you ate at his table, sweet pet?’’ You shake your head, your stomach roaring once more.

‘’No.’’ Your voice is a quiet soft muttering. You rub your arms.

‘’Were you spanked, if you tried?’’ Aemond wonders. You have never been spanked before and you feel the blood rush to your cheeks at his suggestive little smirk.

‘’No.’’ You mutter again.

‘’You know what? Your daddy is my prisoner now, pet. I think you can sit your pretty bastard ass down.’’ You do as he wishes, picking the chair that normally belonged to Karst. He won’t ever sit that chair again. You won’t ever hear his voice again. Aemond made sure of that.

You feel a soft smack on your hand and flinch, shocked that the prince lightly smacked you.

‘’No, little pet. I want you to warm me..’’ He murmurs in your ear and your belly roars as you subtly try to free yourself, but it's no use as his grip only tightens.

He is thinking of his lap. You know it. But you must try to deflect his intentions. ‘’Shall I bring candles?’’ You mutter. ‘’Or perhaps a blanket?’’

He scoffs. He does not need a blanket. He is not truly cold. He is simply making use and a spectacle of you. To mock you. He sits back down in your father's chair.

You are grabbed and squeak afraid. ‘’You're a witty clever thing.’’ He speaks, before sitting you down firmly on his lap. ‘’No, you'll warm me. I told you you were to keep me warm during my conquest and you will.’’ You whimper.

He chuckles, kissing your hair. ‘’My pretty pet.’’ He murmurs. You don't feel pretty at all. You feel weak and small on his lap. You try to move, to find comfort but it is no use. You are frightened and terrified.

Midy comes back from the kitchen with a tray of food. She does not help you fight Aemond. She does avert her eyes, ignoring you both. ‘’I will feed her anything first.’’ He barks at her suddenly, causing you to flinch. ‘’Just in case you thought to poison me.’’ He adds. Great. As if being his pet is not bad enough; you'll be forced to be a taster too.

Midy is not impressed by his behaviour. ‘’I figured. I made the muffin for her lady. All the food is poison free. But please, feed her first.’’ She places various pastries with fruit bases in front of the prince and you. You can't move.

Aemond picks up one of the plates with a strawberry muffin on it.

‘’What is going on here exactly? My pet has not been fed.’’ You avoid looking at Midy. ‘’She told me she had food. Last night. What is the meaning of this?’’

You had time for breakfast this morning but someone ran off with a horse and got herself into trouble. ‘’I had to save Diandra first.’’ Your sister will always be a priority.

Aemond grabs your chin so firmly that you cry out. Midy sets a foot in your direction but understands her interfering will do more harm than good. ‘’You will do no foolish things anymore. You are mine now. And I want you well fed for what comes next.’’ He warns you with a soft slap on your knee.

You repeat his words in your head, becoming anxious. What can he possibly need you for?

‘’Leave us.’’ Midy waits for your command, ignoring the prince, her conqueror and the man that holds your lives in his hands. ‘’Wench! Leave us!’’ He yells. You nod quickly, granting her permission. And Midy leaves.

Aemond cuts off a piece of the muffin. ‘’Open wide.’’ He tells you. You quietly burst into soft sobs. He grabs your hair and pulls it, lifting your head in your neck so he may feed you easier. ‘’Wide.’’ He groans again.

This time you obey and the piece of juicy strawberry muffin is laid on your tongue. You chew and swallow like an obedient girl. Aemond brings his thumb to his mouth before making it wet, cleaning your lips of crumbs and juice. ‘’Tonight, I will ask the same of you. You best obey then.’’ You nod, absent at his words. You try to understand what he could possibly mean.

‘’You wish to kiss me? Is that it?’’ You are insecure. You have never been kissed before.

He scoffs again. ‘’If you call that kissing, of course my sweet; let us call it kissing.’’ You try to reach for a fork but he grabs your hand slamming it on the table painfully before you can. You whimper once more, in pain as you put your hands on your lap. ‘’I don't trust you with silverware yet. You will be fed.’’ He tells you running a hand down your left knee.

You nod hesitantly. Aemond cuts the lemoncake in pieces for you and brings the pieces to your mouth, feeding you as if you can't eat yourself.

It should not feel intimate. It should not feel as exciting and unknown to you as it does. But sitting on his warm warrior lap, having his unprovoked attention, and him, a prince feeding you, a bastard makes all sorts of confusing things happen.

You don't pay attention, and some of the juice ends up on your chin. You try to wipe it away.

‘’Come here, clumsy thing…’’ Aemond whispers in your ear. Your face is turned to his and he brings his mouth to your chin, licking away the lemon juice as you gasp softly and stiffen. Aemond's hands hold you tightly so you may not escape.

A soft delicate moan leaves his lips, coming straight from his gut, perhaps his manhood. ‘’Mhm…’’ You never heard such an intriguing yet terrifying sound.

Once you sit back comfortably against his front you can't help but notice a small irritation that is poking you from behind. ‘’Do you have a belt perhaps? Something is poking me. Irritating me.’’ You try not to sound too whiny. It is not as firm as a rock, but something is bothering you and poking your tailbone.

He smirks. ‘’My apologies.’’ That is all he says with a chuckle.

You don't understand at first.

‘’Just take it off.’’ You tell him as another piece of cake is shoved in your face. You obediently open your mouth, and Aemond feeds you another piece of delicious cake.

You chew and bite, savouring the good taste.

He whispers in your ear again.

‘’I can't do that, unfortunately. I'm very attached to that part.’’ You remember reading a romance book where the female lead was engaging in behaviour unsuited for her station, which brought her male lover so much joy that he felt...

One word crosses your mind. Erected. ‘’O,’’ You manage to squeak out. ‘’I-’’ You become at a loss for words and embarrassed, mortified and silent.

‘’Just enjoy your cake for now.’’ He softly touches your shoulders when feeding you another price. The cake is good. It might be the only good thing left in your life. Will this be a regular thing? How long until he trusts you with silver? How long until he bores of you and kills you? All sort of unpleasant thoughts you don’t want to think of. And yet you do.

Aemond leaves a soft kiss on your head. ‘’Good girl.’’ He coos in your ear, approvingly. You stiffen a bit more, blood rising to your cheeks. You never liked it when someone called you a 'good girl' and he is no exception. ‘’Interesting.’’ He comments a moment later after studying your reaction.

You hope he is pleased for now. ‘’What is?’’ You nearly shout, uncomfortable with his staring.

But to think he would make this easy would be a mistake.

‘’Nothing.’’ He shrugs a little too, grinning as you worry only grow and grow.

He decides to change the subject as well. ‘’I'm glad you decided to eat.’’ As if you had a choice. He would have shoved it down your throat, you are sure of it.

You sniffle, scoffing.

‘’Was it an option to refuse? What good am I without food? A human can't think without food.’’ You are thirsty too. You need to eat and to drink so you can work out a escape plan for you and your family.

Aemond sighs, before impatiently tapping with his feet against the ground. ‘’Damn servants. Someone get in here!’’He shouts loudly, and you flinch at his hard voice. A servant maid comes rushing in, someone else than Midy. You don’t know her name. She is fairly new. She makes a curtsy, her hands shaking. ‘’My prince?’’

‘’Get us wine.’’ He says, as if its that obvious. ‘’One of you wenches gave me food, without wine. I should have her flayed to say the least for that crime.’’ You stare at the cake, forcing your anger out by staring it down, because you can’t hit Aemond.

The girl gets to work, searching in cabinets and chests alike until she finds you two different cups and a bottle of very poorly aged wine. ‘’What a useless servant. I should have my dragon fest upon you. But Vhagar does not appreciate stupid wenches.’’ Aemond speaks to you after she is gone.

You are handed a cup first, by him. You taste it first for the prince, aware this could kill you.

But you trust your servants. It is a good wine. Not old, not ancient, not anything Aemond would have been given. It is decent. But after the day you had, it is perfect. ‘’How does the wine taste?’’ Aemond asks after watching you drink as eager as a kitten by a mother cat.

You feel better, still terrified and worried, but you aren't hungry anymore. ‘’Quite good.’’ It is the truth. The sweet taste of the wine makes your head a little lighter and a little less troubled. You do remind yourself to watch out around Aemond with the alcohol. You don't know how this will end.

He sits a little straighter, moving you unintentionally over his lap, causing an unfamiliar sensation burning between your legs. ‘’I wish to taste your wine.’’ His voice is a few octaves deeper, his pupil is slightly widened.

You obediently hand him the other remaining cup. You have no desire to fight him or to get angry. It is just wine. ‘’Yes, you shall.’’

But you are not prepared for what happens next. Instead of taking your cup, he throws it on the ground, spilling it and grabs you by the bodice of your dress, dragging you closer. His mouth opens and roughly pushes onto yours, as his strong arms restrain you until you stop fighting him. Once your guard is down, his left hand slips from your wrist that he pinned to your legs. Your lips open for a moment to breathe and he takes this moment. He kisses you and plunders you too.

His tongue licks out your mouth, tasting every drop you had as your lips press against one another. ‘’Quite good indeed.’’ He tells you when you are panting softly. ‘’I see you are a quick student.’’ He looks at your chest area where your nippels have hardened as two gemstones.

You curse yourself and quickly try to cover yourself after that kiss.

‘’I didn't mean to-’’ You have to defend yourself. You are not a harlot.

He chuckles slowly, almost disheartening and mockingly.

‘’Such a needy girl. Good thing I captured you, hm? Is your cunt wet as well?’’ He wonders out loud, and you are thankful your servants are all dismissed.

You remain defiant.

‘’I don't know what that is.’’ Yes you do, but you have no desire to play his games.

Aemond's good eye slightly twitches before it lowers suggestively to the space between your legs, that is still covered with the fabric of your dress. You know what he referred to. Yet you pretend you don't know.

He speaks, wettening his lips with the edge of his tongue. ‘’It's what a man fucks when his lover is on her knees. It's a little small gate to pure delight, one can enter and pleasure will build if you keep fucking it.’’ He describes it oddly. It sounds painful and shameful. ‘’It's fun for the woman too.’’ He adds once he sees your judgmental glare.

You never heard that before outside of your romance novels. Pleasure was never a reason for you to marry even as a bastard. ‘’Is it?’’ You ask, your voice is a little timid. You are curious. Of course you are. You pleasured yourself before but a man, an actual man of flesh and blood...

He nods, clearly enjoying how eager and patient you listen to him. ‘’Yes, pet. It can be very fun for the woman too, if she finds herself a skilled lover.’’ You wonder if he is such a skilled lover.

But you wonder so quietly. He is not a lover material. He is the opposite of it. He killed dozens of innocent people and trapped your father and your sister. He killed your brother and made you carry his head around.

You can not deny that he is handsome, as a conqueror that came straight from a historic book, but you can not deny that he is your enemy either. It is best to remain wary and to keep up your guard.

His hands rub your left knee softly patting you when his right hand caresses your face, feeling the warmth of your flesh. ‘’But, as we are just master and pet, well, I'm afraid your pleasures must be earned.’’ Earned. You don't like the sound of that. He chuckles and leans in a little closer.

And the words 'master' and 'pet' send shivers down your spine.

‘’What of your pleasures?’’ You wonder, putting your own needs aside. You need to know what will happen to you.

His response is short and brief.

‘’Isn't that obvious? You'll take care of that from now on. And don't you dare to....disobey or I will punish you too.’’ He grins and you can only imagine how horrible he will punish you. You don't think you saw what he is fully capable of yet. And yet what you already saw terrifies you. You don't want to meet this monster. You don't want to see the bloodshed.

And there is one final question to be asked. Until now, there have been unsubtle innuendos about his plans with you. Slapping your ass, calling you his and now the pleasure and the face licking. He plans on taking you as his conquest tonight, part of you understands it. And you are terrified. ‘’So you'll...You'll…’’

Aemond suddenly snaps his head at his two soldiers. ‘’You two. Go find another person to bother with your needless breathing. Me and the Lady wish to be alone.’’

They understand they can better leave than stay if they wish to remain alive. ‘’Enjoy, my Prince.’’ One of them says, referring to you as if you are just another fruity pastry. You glare at him, causing Aemond to chuckle. ‘’Show that little cunt what dragons do with sheep.’’ He adds when he sees your fiery glare. ‘’Should you bore of her; We always look for strong-willed whores.’’

And there is your fear. You fear Aemond will bore himself with you soon and pass you down. You expect Aemond to chuckle. But instead you feel him push you to stand up and hear him stand up and hear flesh connect with flesh and a sharp grunt. ‘’That's quite enough familiarity. I'm your prince, do not forget yourself.’’ The soldier has a handprint on his face and you understand that the prince must have disciplined him.

‘’I am sorry, I thought the girl was spoils.’’ You never suspected he would go as far as to hit one of his own men for you. Over an insult too.

You understand that Aemond did not do it for you. He did it for himself. ‘’She is. But she is my spoils. I will claw out the eyes of every man that looks at her funny, and take the tongue of every soul who dares to insult her. Do you wish to be the first?’’ He asks.

You speak up. ‘’That won't be needed, my prince. I am not insulted-’’ you have to try to save the man's life. So what if he called you a whore? He does not need to die for his own foolishness, all men would die if that was the case.

Aemond does not need to move an inch in your direction or to raise his voice. All he needs to do is be and exist and look in your direction. ‘’You'll be quiet.’’ Is all the prince says.

You obey, silently wiping at your eyes with a soft nod. The prince smacks the man again, drawing blood. He seems to like that. ‘’Well? Will you be the first?’’ He asks the soldier.

The man shakes his head afraid.

‘’No, my prince.’’

Aemond grimaces a little disappointed. ‘’Good. Then let me fuck my sheep in peace.’’ You whimper wordlessly as the guard leaves. Sheeps are common export in your town, but you fear he is not talking about an actual sheep. He is talking about you.

Aemond walks back to the table where you obediently sit, quiet and shaking like a leaf. He counts the silverware. You understand that you had an opportunity and did not take it. A fork or a knife would be great to defend yourself with. And what did you do? You watched your captor abuse another man.

The silence that follows is worse than any word he could have spoken. You watch as he cuts off a piece of the strawberry cake and takes a piece himself, his fingers red with the juice that looks like blood. ‘’Little Lamb. I like that for you.’’ He speaks as he brings the strawberry cake to his lips.

Your shaking becomes worse.

He scoffs. ‘’You know why it fits?’’ He asks as if you are a stupid little girl. You know why he likes the sheep for you. Because of your home town.

‘’We are known for our sheep.’' You mutter. You don't want to talk about it. You want to go to your bedroom and forget this even happened.

There is that scoffing little laugh again. ‘’It could have been as simple as that, but it's not. A sheep is a flock member. It does not understand or want things. It only does what its shepard wants.’’ That is not true. You know the sheep too well to understand that sheeps certainly have wills and minds of their own.

You imagine he has not seen a lot of sheep. ‘’Sheep are stubborn animals. They are often underestimated.’’

He scoffs, and you understand he must have taken your words as a warning or even a threat. You did not intend for it. ‘’I found out a long time ago I am not a patient man, little Lamb. If you rebel or disobey; you will regret it deeply.’’ He warns you his voice is cold.

You are quick to apologise and to appease him. ‘’It was not meant as a threat…’’ You hope he believes you.

Aemond ignores you, simply throwing a plate on the ground causing you to flinch. ‘’I think it was. I think you are ungrateful.’’ You are not. You know that.

He sighs before approaching you, grabbing you by your neck. You are yanked in his direction with your face and you sniffle when he brushes your face, smearing tears everywhere. ‘’Perhaps, I need to be firm. You are mine now. You will likely disobey sooner or later and I must put you in your place whenever you do such a foolish thing.’’ You don't like the sound of that.

He continues to softly rub your lips with his fingers, his eye looking at you as if you are a delicious reward. ‘’Why would I wait for you to rebel or to disobey? If I punish you right now, you would not even think of it.’’

You weakly protest. You have to remain calm and obedient. You need to calm him down. ‘’I don't want punishment.’’ It is a weak soft request, a beg for mercy and a coward's path. You should not let fear rule your life but this man terrifies you.

Aemond has finished his cake.

‘’No, I imagine you don't. It would not be effective if you did.’’ He grins. ‘’I shall clear the table. You can lay with your chest on the top, I shall remove your skirts and small clothes and-’’ your mind fills with terrible images.

‘’No, gods…’’ You mutter unsure if anyone can hear you. You even eye the door to the entrance of your home, debating if you should run. Judging by his smirk and slightly narrowed eyes, he has seen that you want to flee and challenges you, no begs you to give it a try. So he may capture you, and punish you.

Aemond ignores your cries. ‘’And I will spank you. I won't fuck you yet. But you can rest assured you will be punished.’’ This is the second time he mentioned spanking and you wonder quietly if he is sane.

He pats the table, inviting you over when rubbing his hands, after he threw all the food the maids worked so hard on away or simply on the ground for the rats the find. ‘’Lay down, so we can begin. ‘’He speaks folding his hands on his back. ‘’I won't hesitate to collect you.’’ He adds when you don't move an inch.

You bend on the table, your face and chest on the cold marble. Aemond takes stand behind you, lifting the skirt of your dress, revealing your legs and your small clothes. He sinks his fingers inside of your small clothes, before pulling them down as you wordlessly gasp. You feel his hands cup and touch the cheeks of your butt.

You never had another's fingers so close to your entrance or so close to your skin.

You hear him almost groan or moan again, before squeezing your cheeks.

‘’Mhm..’’

You try to bring your stiffened body to ease. You calm yourself down and tell yourself the prince will only spank you for now. He said so himself.

Your breath becomes less chased and ragged and your nerves settle. Until you feel something soft poke the area between your cheeks, poking and mocking you. Your hips are grabbed and you are slightly tilted. He can see your lady parts Fully now.

You close your leg with a yelp.

‘’Spread them, I have not finished inspecting you.’’ He commands you with a firm slap on your front. You cry out and obey, spreading for the prince in a instant, in a impulse to avoid more pain.

‘’This wasn't part of the agreement. I would be spanked!’’ You yell in anger and frustration.

He only grins, but does discipline you for your outburst by hitting your wet folds two sharp times. You cry and moan at the same time, tears shining in your eyes.

‘’You'll get it in a moment, you can rest assured.’’ You would know better than to trust his word.

‘’A maiden's cunt.’’ He says after he takes in your wetness. His cold fingers press softly against your front before he slips a finger down between your folds, gently touching and rubbing your pearl as you are overwhelmed with too many emotions at once.

Grief. Denial. Anger. Humiliation. And finally...arousal and acceptance.

Aemond likes the soft gasps and moans that leave your throat as you are touched by him. You worry if anyone can see you this way ‘’So nervous. No need pet. I am just looking at how well you respond to touch.’’ He says, as if this is a game. He rubs a few times over your pearl, your sexual needs rising. ‘’As I suspected. You respond very well. Good girl. Just enjoy yourself. Just get your cunny wet.’’ You don't want to. You want to stop your own desires.

He grins as you cry and fight your emotions. ‘’So wet. I wonder why. It can't be the thought of having the big bad prince spank you, that has you this way can it?’’ You will kill him.

‘’Please…’’ You beg, and a lonely tear escapes. Do you beg him to continue, to let you be, to stop, to kill you or to have mercy? You don’t know. You really don’t know. And you don’t want to know.

You are spread on your father's table with a man between your legs, rubbing your cunt. This is wrong. ‘’You are so innocent and sweet, my little lamb.’’ He coos in your ear. ‘’What is with the little tears hm?’’ He mocks you now too

‘’Are you worried about the pain of the act? Or are you worried I will kill you afterwards? What troubles you so?’’ You worry for both now too.

You confess your fear to him. It is best to be honest. You know he will do what he likes anyway. Your fears wont stop him. ‘’That you will bore yourself to death with me and pass me to your men. That I'll be defiled and shared.’’

A horrible image is again formed in your brain where Aemond watches as two of his guards....

You shiver and Aemond squeezes your folds, pinching the soft delicate and wet skin. ‘’As long as you can keep my interest, that won't be happening.’’ He says as if it is that simple.

And that is what you are worried about. You open your mouth but before you can speak his finger is inserted between your legs, entering your pure untouched body. You never met someone as daring and bold as him, fucking you on his mere fingers without even taking you out for dinner first.

You have instincts that become awakened. The urge to roll your hips to his fingers and the urge to hold his hands so you may fuck in peace. Yet you force yourself to remain silent and still. You will not make this easy.

Eventually the fucking stops, leaving you high and needy. The finger is drenched in white transparent substance almost like sweat or perhaps something that looks like poorly made whipped cream.

Aemond forces his dirty finger against your lips. You do not open or respond. ‘’Taste it. Suck my finger off.’’ He commands you, in his rough aroused voice. ‘’Taste your own wetness.’’ He adds, shoving the fingers against your lips and letting your lips taste your own juices.

You push his hands away in a hurtful and confused moment. You feel like he asked too much of you. ‘’No. That is gross. I've entertained you enough.’’ You declare.

Sometimes in history books, maesters write when heroes knew they had dug their own graves. This was your moment. You knew it.

Aemond drops the finger, insulted and slightly tilts his head, studying for a cold good minute before speaking. ‘’No? You have not? Have you forgotten who of us rules this town? It's not you, which is why your cunt is within my grasp.’’ He tries to touch your cunt, but you have had enough of him. You act on anger and rage.

You strike the prince across his face. It is not very impressive or a strong smack but Aemond might understand his attention is not wanted.

But one look at the prince and you know that you have only made things worse. Much worse.

He undoes his leather belt, rolling it up casually when you gulp. You watch as he approaches you, belt in hand and ready to use it. You have heard stories. Never read them, as pain terrifies you.

Aemond chuckles. ‘’O, you will regret that dearly, little pet.’’ He smacks your face down on the table, causing you to cry out. You crawl away over the table, your dress causing trouble, but don't get very far.

He drags you back by your ankle, your legs and finally your hips and forces your dress further off your body, properly stripping you of whatever dignity you had left. You hear him chuckle and that's when you feel immense pain on your lower back, your ass, and upper back respectively. You wail and whine and complain and cry but none of it matters.

The prince uses you as his whipping toy until there is blood on his belt and he is panting.

He rolls you on your back, and spreads your legs. ‘’Watch. Follow the belt.’’ He tells you, his voice a little hoarse. You nod obediently and nearly cry when the belt is placed on your wet sensitive maiden cunt.

‘’My prince, please no-’’

It is too late when you see his grin grow twice the size and the belt cracks down on your skin, causing pleasure and pain to mix inside of you as you roll your head in your neck and just scream for the gods to hear.

Aemond hisses slowly before he briefly turns his back to you. You catch your breath before the finger is pushed in your face again. ‘’Suck, now.’’ He tells you.

This time you open your mouth and take his finger in your own hands, guiding it inside your mouth. Your lips smack when the finger enters and you obediently suck his nails clean for him, removing your own juice and taste of his soft and yet dangerous fingers.

You have never done anything like this before. But you come to the conclusion you quite like it. It is relaxing. You have a task, a clear task and are kept busy too. You like it because for a moment you forget your troubles and misery.

‘’Such a shame I needed to make you bleed to get you to listen to me. I don't like seeing my pet bleed.....’’ You don't know if that's true. You don't want to know.

You suck a little harder, as he exhales deeply. ‘’You have good soft lips, little Lamb. Your muscles need training, but I see potential. I would not have taken you as my pet if I did not see what a beautiful obedient little pet you can become for me.’’ You feel shivers run down your spine yet ignore it.

‘’Take the finger out if you wish to speak.’’ He challenges you with a grin. You rather not. You have spoken and he punished you. ‘’No? You're such a little craven. You rather suck my finger and remain quiet hm? It's safer for you that way.’’ He grins, moving his finger up and down in your mouth. Your lips suck and smack at his commands and his movements, your eyes never leaving his own.

‘’My dragon, Vhagar, loves maidens.’’ Aemond grins leaning in to sniffle your neck and to smell your fear. That is when you speak up to beg for your life.

‘’Please my prince…’’ Your voice shakes the moment you speak becoming a soft emotional squeak.

‘’Do you apologise, little lamb?’’ Aemond asks, ignoring your cries and your heartbroken voice.

You nod. ‘’Yes, I am sorry.’’ It takes great effort to lie to him. You are a woman of the truth. You would never lie if it wasn't needed.

He nods approvingly but there is a warning glare in his good eye.

‘’The next time you raise a hand to me, you will lose your hand. Is that understood?’’ You nod again, terrified.

‘’Yes.’’ You know he prefers verbal answers.

He clicks his tongue. ‘’Your wetness is all over the table, naughty thing. I think you'll actually enjoy me fucking you tonight. You sure seem ready for a good, through, and proper fucking.’’ You are not ready. Not at all. So why does this idea excites you? Perhaps you are just in need for company, more than you thought you were.

And he knows this. Of course he does. ‘’Though, You are of age, unmarried and alone. So that does makes sense, to long a husband, to long feeling bred.'' You have trouble picturing it. You remain silent instead of making a witty reply. To that he laughs. ‘’Yes, I bet my little lamb will scream all sorts of delicious little cries when I make her come all over my cock. You seem like the type that enjoys it rough.’’ You have been with no lover. You know better than he what you like, however.

There are moments when you are reading and are overcome with desires and needs. You touch yourself to get rid of the feelings. So you know how your own desires work. You know so perfectly. ‘’I-i prefer it gently.’’ You admit, softly.

The prince does not like that answer. ‘’You're a maiden. You don't know what you prefer.’’ He speaks as if you are foolish and chuckles in a condescending manner. You have trouble keeping your face neutral so he won't smack you again.

It leaves your mouth before you can stop the words. ‘’Yes I do. I touch…’’ You stop yourself, as blood raises to your cheeks and you become quiet.

Aemond grins in approval, liking where this conversation is heading. ‘’Go on. It's rude to not finish your sentence.’’ He says. You would rather be rude than be thought of as an easy harlot.

You refuse to let him have power over you. ‘’I touch myself.’’ You obediently say. Aemond's last remaining eye takes in your naked body, as if picturing where your hands would be when you are doing this to yourself.

‘’Show me. Show me how you do that.’’ He says, commanding you. as if you are his dog. You obey and look around briefly for spectators or witnesses. Aemond sits down in the chair and plants you on the table, so he can see you properly.

You sit down and start touching and rubbing your breasts. ‘’You are a slow one, hm?’’ Aemond comments after he has watched you for 2 minutes. It is difficult to raise arousal when he is watching. You are worried you will ruin it.

‘’Your breasts have had enough. I think another part of your body wants pleasure.’’ He means your cunt. You hesitate. ‘’Are you perhaps scared?’’ He grins scoffing and leaves a kiss on your hair.

‘’No need for that. I'll see it tonight anyway. I already took a peek. You have nothing to be ashamed of.’’ He says. You bring your fingers to your entrance and start touching yourself when the prince watches you.

‘’Such an eager little thing.’’ Aemond comments as your fingers go a little faster and harder, as you become aroused. He watches with his brow raised. You never were this wet so quickly. ‘’Are you this way for every man that cages you and your family and kills half your town or am I the only one?’’ He wonders, ruining your pleasure with the hard difficult truth.

You try to restart but it is difficult with the thought of your brother now haunting you. His head is literally on the floor behind the table where you are sitting.

‘’So amateurish. Poor girl. I will have you praying for the gods when I fuck you.’’ You know you do it wrong but you don't care. You do it as you like it.

And finally you give up.

A smack shows what the prince thinks of that. ‘’I didn't tell you to stop, did I?’’ He asks his gaze aimed at the triangle between your legs.

‘’No my prince.’’ You mutter, rubbing the spot on your thigh where he hit you. He grins.

‘’Continue.’’

You pick up where you left off and touch yourself again in front of him. ‘’I rather just avoid my officers and officials, drag you off by your hair and tie you to the bed until your belly is swollen with my seed and all you taste is my cum. I want your nails to drag over my back and I want your voice to be hoarse from all the screaming you did.’’ Your fingers go smoother and quicker. ‘’Perhaps I'll buy you a whore. Perhaps I'll make you fuck her when I watch. Or, make her fuck you, that's seems to be the likely scenario.’’ You picture yourself with a beautiful woman laying under her as she takes you roughly with Aemond watching.

You cry a little louder, your pleasure building rapidly as you fuck your own fingers.

He sees your changing body and knows. ‘’You can stop.’’ He cheerfully says. You are confused and glare, rubbing one final time.

‘’I said: 'stop'.’’ He groans, hitting you as a warning. You whimper, still aroused. ‘’You fucking whore.’’ He adds, grinning wildly. ‘’You disgusting little whore. You have no loyalty at all, hm?’’

You break into tears at his cruel words. You sob helplessly. ‘’I did what you wanted from me.’’

‘’What I want from you is more than your little fingers gently rubbing your cunt. I want to fuck you bloody.’’ He declares, his voice raspy. ‘’You know what soon will be in your body?’’ You shake your head afraid.

Aemond grabs you from the table, forces you to stand and to meet his front with your behind. You feel it poke you so clearly now. His erected cock, through his pants. ‘’My cock, as I fucking impale you on it and fuck you senseless.’’ He smacks your ass.

‘’You are too gentle when you touch yourself. You need it firm and clear or your bastard peasant mind will wander off.’’ You understand he must really hate you. And the fact that he wants you? He hates that even more.

a/n thank you for reading!

I shall be back when ...the stars allow it.

And my inspiration.

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lover-of-skellies · 9 months

Note

cant believe no ones asked about cross's smoochability yet

Well guys, it looks like we’ve got our first perfect score! Cross got a rating of 12 out 12, so he’s the perfect candidate to be smooched

1) Is Cross’s mouth dangerous at all? From what I know, he has these tiny little fangs, as opposed to the standard flat teeth that most Sanses seem to have. His fangs could poke your lips, but not enough to do seriously injure you or draw blood, so that being said, his mouth is safe. 2 points for mouth safety

2) Would he bite? Not intentionally. I could see him maybe nipping a little on accident if the kiss is done in more of a clumsy sort of way, but he doesn’t seem like someone who’d purposely bite super hard with the intention of causing pain. Is he aggressive? He can be if the situation calls for it, since he’s not afraid to put his foot down. Most of the time and in casual settings though, no, I don’t see him as being an aggressive person. That being said, he gets 2 points for being nice and exercising self control

3) Are there any health hazards to the smoocher? That we know of, no there’s not. He’s clean and he keeps up with his hygiene, he’s not leaking gross fluids everywhere, and while he does carry weapons, he’s a former guard, so I’d assume he knows how to be safe about how he carries and handles them, to avoid accidentally hurting anyone. X!Gaster manipulating him in Underverse aside, I don’t see any health hazards about him, so there’s 2 more

4) Does he have a sympathetic backstory? From what I know about him and his whole story, he has a very fragmented relationship with his brother, because he wanted his own identity outside of being a Sans, and Paps didn’t really seem to fully grasp that. I could be missing details about their relationship, but I just know they don’t get along. Then there’s the issue with X!Gaster being a horrible father who was never there for either of his sons. He was emotionally absent, and he seemed entirely unconcerned about them (just from what I’ve seen and what I know). So right there, Cross has this horrible family structure; he’s got both sibling issues and daddy issues. Then from the little information I can recall right now, he got into it with Error and nearly died somehow, and then he was manipulated into working for Nightmare. Which… as much as I like Nightmare, he’s not a nice person. Cross went from a very shaky home environment, to a very shaky work environment, where he couldn’t really count on anyone. His only friend for a while was Ink, but we see how well that went over in Underverse. Things started to turn around for him when he left Nightmare and started working with Dream instead, but there’s no doubt that he probably still has a lot of residual trauma from everything. So for points, I think he deserves 2. His upbringing and backstory in general was super rough and there were areas that were very tragic for him, no doubt

5) Does he deserve a smooch? In short,, yes, absolutely. He had a very rough upbringing and it probably took a bit for him to actually open up to anyone, but rather than letting that consume him and turning completely bad and evil because of it, he made the choice to be better than that. He still had anxiety and probably some other issues too, but he chose to walk away from the toxic environment that was working for Nightmare. He walked away, and he went with Dream, who made him feel like more of an equal, and less of a subordinate. Cross walked away and made the choice to be better than his former boss and teammates, which paved the way for a somewhat brighter future. He made the right choices and he has my respect for that, so he gets 2 points

6) Is Cross cute or cool? He can be a cutie from time to time, and I do like his design, since the monochrome look is unique to him, I think. There are probably other Sanses that are monochrome too, but of them all, I think he’s the most well known. His strength and skills in combat, his laidback personality, and his look (despite being a bit rough around the edges) earn him a full 2 points for coolness

In total, Cross gets a rating of 12. He gets a perfect score! He’s awkward and may not have a lot of kissing experience, but he’s very careful about pretty much everything he does. I feel like if he was smooched, he’d get embarrassed, start blushing, and probably trip over his words for a moment before simply asking why you suddenly smooched him. If you already knew him really well when you chose to plant a kiss on him, he might even awkwardly thank you for it while trying to avoid eye contact, because he’s a bit of a tsundere from time to time like that

#anon #asks #cross sans #smoochability rating

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saccharineclover · 9 months

Text

Work Song pt2

Boys, when my baby found me, I was three days on a drunken sin. I woke with her walls around me, Nothin' in her room but an empty crib And I was burnin' up a fever. I didn't care much how long I lived But I swear I thought I dreamed her, She never asked me once about the wrong I did

A/N: Warning this part does have descriptions of anxiety and panic attacks and brief mention of Suici. Ideation, Leon has trauma and I never see anyone write it so here you go! (hurt/comfort)

W/C: 1.2K

Leon whimpers, ears ringing as he startled awake, body soaked in sweat. He’s quick to try and move, sore body grasping at the blankets to free himself of the confines, his other hand shoots to his neck, pressing rough fingers to his skin.

Even as he stumbles in dark to the bathroom, he cant breathe, why can’t he breathe, he slaps his hand down onto the cold stone of the sink, legs giving out from under him, gasping loudly. He not full aware of the ruckus he’s making on the way down. His chest moves rapidly as he claws at his neck, eyes screwed shut.

Gentle fingers, guide the weak hands away, and sweet voice echoing in his ears. “Leon, Leon, breathe, please baby, it’s okay, you’re okay, I need you to breathe for me”

Slowly, he peels open his eyes, only able to make out your silhouette. He lets out a trembling exhale, before taking a few shaky breaths under the direction of your sleepy but concerned voice. He swallows heavily at your praise, chest deflating as his breathing enters a relatively normal pace. You make no move to turn on the bright lights, instead letting the moonlight bounce off the shiny materials of the bathroom floor, walls, and decor. Together, you stay on the floor of the bathroom, the cold tiles grounding leon.

You worriedly search through all his shattered pieces hoping to find the right one to slide everything back into place, “Do you wanna stay here, Leon?” You question, only giving him something simple, not wanting to entirely disrupt his recovering state. He response is croaked, and broken, but ultimately you understand, nodding before going to father a few things.

When you settle next to him once more there’s a blanket in your arms and a few bottles of water. You remind yourself to not push, that you have to give him space, and time to voice what he wants. This silence is nothing like what you’re used to, it’s heartrending and unpleasant. It leaves you empty, with nothing to do but think. You gaze over the dark finger shaped bruises that line his neck, and the way his eyes are blood shot and watery. He looks tense, every single muscle pulled tight, despite the seaming comfort and safety of your apartment. Your is chest tight with an emotion you don’t know how to disperse as he stays deathly still.

Leon’s eyes dart around the dark room, only aided by the streams of moonlight that float through your sheer curtains. He feels full with fear, mind and body warring against each other. He keeps trying the strategies that you taught him but he cant help it, eyes tearing up, as he turns his head. He notices your troubled look, which sends him into an weeping frenzy. Leon’s hiccuping, head snapping back to the front as he curses, hands flying to cover his face, shame and embarrassment consuming him.

You try to conjure up a way to bring him some solace, worrying your bottom lip between your teeth as you scoot a bit closer. You’re hesitant, not wanting to set him off even more, or cause another panic attack to swarm his already overstimulated body. Even with your worries, you move, one leg thrown over both of his, pressing your weight into his thighs, leaving space between you, just in case.

You pull his hands away from his face, again, placing them on your waist. Leon cries more, grip tightening as he feels you, knows you’re there. He hisses, still sobbing and you’re desperately searching for a way to calm him down.

“Don’t cry, baby, please, tell me what’s wrong? what can I do,” You plead, voice breaking, hands gingerly making their way to his splotchy cheeks. You move carefully, eyes on his shiny blue ones, watching for any giveaways as you wipe away the wetness. His skin is smooth and warm under your fingers, he feels so alive under you despite how you know he must feel.

Leon takes a deep breath, deep enough to move you in his lap, before he begins mumbling. It’s quiet and broken, “How can I claim to be a police officer when i can’t- I couldn’t even save-“

It shatters you, but you suck it up, breathing deeply. Nodding and listening to him ramble on about how he’s such a failure and how weak he is. You let him rant, knowing he needs to get this off his chest, but something in you snaps when he whispers, “I should’ve died..”

You gasp, heart breaking, as you stutter, “Leon,” Your watery eyes jump over his features, sniffling while trying to find the right words. There’s a sort of anger that wants to bubble it’s way up but you can’t find it in yourself to be anything but gentle, “There was nothing you should have done but try to live, Leon.”

And his lips tremble, grip tightening on you as he looks at you through clumped lashes. His eyes glisten, watching as your own lips tremble, “Can, I hug you?” You watch him swallow hard, thinking before nodding lightly, quickly adding “Just one arm..” Immediately you understand, moving to lay your head on his shoulder, one arm slung so that you can play in his hair that rests near the back of his head while the other makes it’s home on his side.

And like this you squeeze yourself into him, chest to chest, practically fusing your bodies. You hands glide effortlessly, as you think on what to say to help quiet the loud screams and shrieks of guilt that you know flow through his mind. You try and fail to hide your own growing sniffles that has Leon wrapping his arms around you tighter. You laugh, knowing that in his grip there was a question, you don’t wait to answer,

“Just thinking,” You try to swallow the heavy lump in your throat, hands moving over his solid chest, feeling his heartbeat. “About what?” You’re certain he knows, but you entertain him, chuckling while you pull back enough to look at his face fully.

“About you,” head tilting as you swallow uselessly once again, “how i could’ve lost you.” Your hands squeeze in their respective places, “how i felt the days after news broke and I wondered if i was ever going to see you again, Leon.”

You look deeply into his eyes as you keep rambling, “About how scared you must have been, how scared you must be. About how much I love you.” It feels like a delicate secret, something only reserved for moonlit hours, but Leon doesn’t miss a beat,

“I love you too”

Your head tips, letting out a twisted laugh, eventually you settle back into your previous position, your hands cup his face as you whisper, “No, Leon, I love you” You makes sure to emphasize his name, and the word love. Just like before, he’s quick, mouth moving with purpose, “I love you.”

Leon’s eyes flick from yours to your plush lips and back up. There’s a moment of time when everything feels slow but oh so right before he’s lurching forward to kiss you like you’ve both always wanted. It’s deep and a little frantic, but it’s needed, that night you devour one another whole.

#resident evil leon #leon s kennedy #leon kennedy fanfic #leon fluff #leon angst #leon x reader #leon s kennedy x reader #gn!reader #re2 leon #leon kennedy #leon kennedy fluff #leon kennedy angst #re2 remake #trauma #panic attack #anxiety attack #tw

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rfaromance · 9 months

Note

How does saeyoung feel about who yoosungs dating?? I cant help but think his first thought would be that she is using him (dispite that not being the case) but we know how worried saeyoung always is

Oh, Saeyoung immediately flies into paranoia. On a good day, he struggles with severe anxiety, but when he finds out Saejoong Choi's daughter is pursuing a romantic relationship with one of his (very few) friends? His mind jumps to all the possible worst-case scenarios.

Is she trying to hurt the people close to Saeyoung, to hurt him? Is she using Yoosung as a pawn to get closer to Saeyoung and take him out? Is she trying to get intel from Yoosung? Will she stalk Yoosung's movements both physically and digitally? He knows agents aren't allowed to have liabilities, but this isn't even a threat from the agency. This is the one threat he fears more than anything else, the specter that has haunted his every step from the moment he drew his first breath.

he's so focused on thinking about her as an enemy, as a threat, as a demon never to be trusted... that he doesn't realize until much later that she's also his half-sister.

but how can he consider her family, when she will never know saejoong choi as a monster but only as a doting, successful father?

(of course, he's not actually a good dad and sae-eun has her own trauma to work through, but that's for a later day. she's also 100% innocent and just wants a golden retriever gamer boyfriend)

(under different circumstances, they could be good friends. in an Another Story timeline, they'd probably bond after everything goes down with the Prime Minister. but since my canon--as Ariella--is Saeyoung's route and the Secret Ending, they... don't ever get as close as they could in Another Story.)

#cmc #sae-eun #saeyoung choi #luciel choi #707 #thanks for the ask!#i love talking about my cmcs i'm so sorry for being cringe

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the-brainrot-central · 1 year

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Yoshikage Kira Mpreg Headcanons

Will probably make more of these for him later, he’s my favorite blorbo rn so i hace a lot of thoughts

He has really bad nausea, can hardly keep anything down in his first trimester. Starts losing some weight because of it, much to his dismay.

Feels really grumpy and like absolute shit, has no idea why for a long time

His stand eventually figures out what’s wrong (it can detect things going on in It’s user’s body, feels and extra heartbeat/hormonal changes)

He totally freaks out when he first finds out. He is NOT prepared to be a father and he’s terrified

Initially wants to get an abortion, but cant bring himself to do it. He hates the idea of consulting with a doctor—it feels invasive, and he values privacy more than anything else.

He settles on keeping it, deciding he’ll give it up for adoption once it’s born

He continues with his usual daily routines, stretches every night, drinks milk etc. It helps him maintain his composure and alleviates some of his aches and pains

He gets sick pretty often during his pregnancy, much to his dismay—whether it be getting an actual cold or just having strong bouts of nausea+pain. Killer Queen takes care of him when he’s ill, making him hot tea, food, bringing him blankets, lighting incense of his favorite scents (anything earthy+natural, nothing too sweet—sweet scents makes him nauseous)

He’s a pretty thin guy, so coworkers start to notice his weight gain pretty quickly. He brushes it off, responding politely to their invasive remarks, but it really annoys him—he hates feeling like a spectacle and it’s frankly none of their business

His violent urges and anger issues become more intense and difficult to control, occasionally loses his temper around others but is quick to regain his composure

His anxiety gets really intense, and he falls back into old nervous habits like biting his nails/skin picking. Sometimes killer queen will notice him doing this and will stop him from doing destructive things. He gets lots of new wounds on his hands/fingers from picking, some of them turn into scars

Starts getting prominent stretch marks around month 5, which really upsets him

Has vivid nightmares, usually relating to trauma or something going wrong with the baby. He usually wakes up in a cold sweat, and Killer Queen comes out to soothe him when this happens

#kira yoshikage #yoshikage kira #jojos bizarre adventure #jojo no kimyō na bōken #jojo hcs #headcanon #Mpreg #male pregnancy #jojo diamond is unbreakable

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thefanimator · 1 year

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i'm kinda sad so uh... have a few nancy holbrook hcs?

favorite subject is art (duh) and lang.

Nancy is the bigspoon like 94% of the time

always paints her nails black or very very dark grey

went to art school after ANOES10

if she were a mammal, she'd be a mink.

Nancy is deathly afraid of anesthetics

she always has smudges of charcoal on her face and fingers

she has autism. (her and quentin are adhd/autism solidary)

still wears quentin's pendant.

listened to quentin's podcast while drawing and doing homework

proposes first

has social anxiety. quentin actually he helps her a lot with this and helps her become more outgoing

father separated from her mother (og!script based) when she was 7. he moved to minnesota and started anew. it always made her feel like she did something wrong.

is bisexual (im sorry i cant go 5 seconds without projecting)

draws little stars, figures and animals on her arm during class to pass the time

is actually pretty damn good at doing eyeliner

although the film only shows dark charcoal paintings, I believe she also has a soft spot for painting vibrant landscapes. the exact opposite of her darker works.

drew quentin A LOT. its actually embarrassing how much

(based off what my mutual said like ten months ago) she has a tattoo on her left shoulder blade of an adrenaline shot. I little out of character but hey. i like that.

(tw// trauma) her worst nightmare is being that same girl that freddy took advantage of. she never wants to be seen as that girl again.

when she'd see jesse/quentin/kris,etc at the diner or around school, she'd get envious. but she was too scared to actually approach these people.

for years, she felt horrifically guilty about how her and quentin survived. they all succumbed to freddy and they killed him. she thinks that she could've saved at least one of the Springwood Five.

#nancy holbrook #anoes10 #a nightmare on elm street 2010 #im going to give her the depth the movie forgot #yeah quen is mentioned A BUNCH #i can't help myself #quentin saw her works once and was like 'ok emo'

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low-budget-korra · 3 years

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Lets talk about Korra (again)

i already made this analysis, and it was well received but i dont know, i wanna do it again. Why not right? My english is better now than was when i made that analysis so i think this one will be better written

What a way to introduce a protagonist. This line and this scene tell us everything we need to know about Korra at that time and everything she knew about herself.

In book one Korra is a 17′s old teenager who have no idea how the world, how life is outside the training center she grew up in and had been locked up since ever. So she is not only naive but have lack of social skills

Oh, and not everyone who lack’s social skills will act like Zuko and Azula okay? Korra can be confident, expressive and outgoing and still have problems when it comes to social skills.One thing dont exclude the other.

“I’m the Avatar and you gotta deal with it” did you guys notice that only for that line we can see the entire opposite on how she treat her role as avatar in comparisson with Aang? And im not here to judge because is two very different contexts.

As far as we know, Korra grew up without friends or romantic partners. Of course, she had her training partners but i believe that they are just that.

So her entarely perception of herself was around her duty as Avatar, she didnt have personal life, she barely was Korra...She was The avatar and thats that.

So she came to Republic City, it was a mess.

Its funny to see that she have no touch when it comes to simply talk to people, i guess when you grew up away from society, this happens. And yes, she is cocky and had to learn that people arent there to somewhat please her, and she learned that quicky.

Thats why the Pro Bending was important for her character, not only for training but also as means of socilization.

Now lets talk about the villains: Amon and Tarrlok

The two of them represents two differents threats to Korra. Amon represents a threat to her duty as Avatar while Tarrlok represents a threat to Korra as a person.

In episode 4 we have what i still thinks is the darker episode from TLOK. In this episode Amon ambushes Korra in the final moments... Even knowing that they did their best to make Amon’s power and control be non-sexualized as possible still...He have her down on her knews, totally helpless and he even invades Korra’s personal space by touching in her face forcing her to look at him. He didn't have to sexually touch her to violate her.

And right after, the fear in Tenzin voice when asking what happened after seeing her laying in the ground like that, and how Korra is sobing in his arms teeling him how powerless and helpless she felt. I mean...Oh, and she keeps terryfied by him until he takes her bending.

Tarrlok in the other hand doesnt do much different from his brother and started to harass Korra because he cant take ‘no’ as a answer when Korra didnt wanted to join his task force.

Whats interesting is that if it wasnt for Tarrlok harassement and maniputation, Korra wouldnt have joined his task force and wouldnt have confronted Amon and wouldn't have gone through that terrible encounter.

The thing is that Korra is caught right in the middle of a politcal power dispute over the city, something that she for sure wasnt prepare for it. And both Amon and Tarrlok woud hurt or kill her without think twice about it if that means gain power. And that was exacly what happened

Tarrlok tried to manipulate her and keep her on leash where he could, and when his tatics didnt worked anymore he alreay had a plan B. Yes that whole metal box in that cabin in the middle of nowhere was made especifically for her and maybe Tenzin if he also get in his way.

In the end Korra lost the physical battle against both but won the ethical battle also against both. She was the responsable for expose both of them as corrupted and hypocrites. But at what price? Amon was able to remove the bends of the Avatar. And without them, how could she be the Avatar?

Remember that her entirely conception of herself was built around her duty as Avatar, be the avatar. After all, everything she was, everything she'd trained so hard for, had been destroyed in minutes. Thats why i still strongly believe that she was thinking about killing herself at the end, nobodys goes all sad and crying to in front of a clifft without thinking about jumping from it.

But she, i think given up the idea and just sit and started to crying when Aang appeared and help her, giving her bendings back in one of the best scenes of the show. So after have everything solve and still managed to get the boy she was in love with, things where great and she “move on”

In that first half, Korra is unbearable. Everything she learned in Book 1 how to be more mature, less spoiled and all, was thrown in the trash and she was the same "child" of the book one only worse.

Until I stopped and realized that I was also unbearable and childish like this when I had my bad phases of anxiety and depression, as defense mechanism and keep people away. Returning to Korra, and if this way of acting of her was nothing more than this defense mechanism?

Because guess what, i dont think she “move on” from all that happened in Book One that fast, and for add more drama she discovered that was her father idea of keeping her locked up training in that training center we saw in book one and not traveling like avatars before her. No wonder she felt betrayed. And for adding even more drama, people still keep treating her like child, so she was despered for some validation. Something that she found in her uncles arms but she was betrayed by him after.

In the end, Korra again goes through a traumatic experience when she has her connection with past lives destroyed. We see how it affected her when she apologizes to Tenzin, through tears. And Tenzin, as the excellent master he is, tries to motivate her to face Vaatu again (now merged with Unalaq, her uncle) and again she saves the day even after go throught a traumatic event

In the final moments, we see the innocent decision to reconnect the world of spirits and the world of men. And we also see Korra and Mako permanently end their turbulent relationship.

Book 3 begins in a more mature, we see all the characters being presented in a more mature way and it seems that Korra now has overcome everything that has passed. We have the relationship between Korra and Asami deepening as well

In Book 3, called "Change" we have a great sacrifice from Korra. Her life goes down a notch when she decides to save the new airbenders from Zaheer and the Red Lotus, the only villain until now that really threat her life since their sole goal was to kill the avatar.

Korra won again but this time victory costed way too much. Yes she save the day again but now she was physically and psychologically defeated. It was too much, she broke.

Book 4 begins and we only saw Korra in the final minutes and she is unrecognizable. We see that, once proud and courageous avatar, in someone depressed and cowerd. We never have saw Korra like that, even when she was afraid of Amon she wasnt like that.

Korra is afraid of being the Avatar again and her fight against PTSD is still one of the most sensitive, responsable and honest representation of Mentall Issues that i saw, and it was before this subject gain more space on media. It was before people started to give attention to this

I also think that she was having flashs from her other fights and not only the one against Zaheer.

Another thing I think is worth mention is that Korra took 3 years to feel safer and re-embrace her duties as Avatar. It was not 3 weeks or 3 months, it was 3 years. And anyone who suffers from some mental illness knows very well the stigma that is, the fight that is, because everyone wants you to be well faster as possible when the truth is that many times you spend years fighting against this. And this is a pressure that falls on you.Imagine, seeing all your friends moving forward while you continue "stock in the same place"?

Only after Korra confronts Zaheer, I think that was a way to show her coping with the trauma, she improves to the point of returning to be the great Avatar we know. I personally still struggles with this scene because put the victim in front of her agressor may not be the best idea but i understand that she needed to see that he was just a man and not the invencible monster her mind was telling her

One of the lines that stuck with me the most was in the TLOK version of the ember island players, the one that made a recap of the show before the finale. When Korra said “I was so naive” just before we watch her narration of her journey, we can feel pain, sadness and strenght. Janet was amazing in the way the delivered this line.

And this fucking quote i saw here on tumblr still is the goat: “The Last Airbender is a story of a boy who becomes a god. The Legend of Korra is the story of a goddess who becomes a girl "

And I still get really pissed when someone comes to talk shit about Korra because she is such an incredible heroine and her journey is also so incredible.

The story of how life can be hard and unfair, how it can hurt and paralyze, but there is always a reason to move on. We should always move on.

Korra is definitely not weak, quite the opposite, she is one of the if not the strongest heroine I have ever seen. Korra inspires overcoming

#korrasami #avatar korra #asami sato #mako #tenzin #bolin #lin beifong #su beifong #kuvira #zaheer #amon #unalaq #tarrlok #the legendd of korra #legend of korra #tlok #lets talk about #avatar

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stimmingstarboy · 3 years

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ok so after season 3 of the good doctor i stopped watching and i finally figured out what i didnt like about the writing of Shaun Murphy and this is the only place i can talk about it so here

his character seems very undeveloped and it feels like he never existed before he got accepted into that hospital. i mean think about it. all this "social learning/learning how to function" hes going through should have happened years ago through 4 years of generals and 4 years of med school. i know he didnt have much of a father figure and growing up in the system can leave people traumatized but at some point in time someone would have told him that talking about sex makes people uncomfortable or that you cant just say certain things. also lets be real he's autistic, grew up in the system and was abused so you would think he at least has some mental health issues since things like depression and anxiety are comorbid with autism and trauma or at least some emotional dysregulation. he should have gone to therapy a long ass time ago to sort things out seeing how much of a hard time he has with coping with stuff. i stopped watching after season 3 so these things could have been sorted out but my point still stands.

#the good doctor #shaun murphy

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traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors · 2 years

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TW: mentions of Possible sexual abuse/mental health issues, mentions of flashbacks/Trauma responses and previous (non-sexual) abuse,

im just really confused about all of this, and its putting a strain on my relationship with my mother, i guess i'd like to know resources/advice, and just have some support on this, since I cant really talk about it with anyone IRL.

Backstory: I have autism and some kind of ptsd/memory issues. my family has a history of OCD, and my therapist thinks I have it as well.

My mom has a boyfriend, I'll call him B. B and I got along mostly (as far as i remember) until recently, now just being in the same room as him makes me extremely uncomfortable, and my brain keeps telling me he's going to assault me in some way. It's gone so far that i've had panic attacks that act like traumatic flashbacks at least once a week, including "memorys" of a previous assult. Just bits and pieces, nothing specific. The problem is, i don't remember this, and it couldn't be possible, I have been home alone with B multiple times, and he hasn't done anything, my mothers never had another partner apart from my father, and i've been alone with my father multiple times, and he hasnt done anything to hurt me (except slap my ass twice) and I can't believe that he'd assult me, he was sort of abusive when he lived with us, but nothing sexual, just verbal, and only when he was drunk.

I've started thinking I have some sort of OCD around Sex/Sexuality, If thats even possible, but this only started recently, around late 2020, even though i've had an aversion to anything Sexual as far as i can remember. But theres still a lot of things I can't explain about it.

Sorry if this is a lot or doesn't make much sense, i don't really know how to explain it well.

-Reid

Hey Reid! Hope you're doing well :)

What you're describing sounds like intrusive thoughts, which are a very common symptom for people with OCD, though they can also occur for people with PTSD, or an otherwise trauma related mental disorder, or sometimes in anxiety disorders as well.

Intrusive thoughts are involuntary, distressing thoughts, images, scenes or suggestions that come to one's mind either out of nowhere or when triggered by something. It's always important to reiterate that they are not a representation of your morals, or of reality. Some people do experience intrusive thoughts related specifically to sexual acts or sexual assault - though, there is no such thing as purely sexual OCD. A possibly better way to describe this would be sexual intrusive thoughts.

Dealing with intrusive thoughts is tricky. Some common techniques used are mindfulness and grounding. Mindfulness refers to centering yourself in the present, guiding yourself through your thoughts and reassuring yourself that it will pass. When a intrusive thought comes, it can be very useful to remind yourself that this is not reality, that this is a fleeting experience, to take your train of thought back to where it originally was, and redirecting yourself. Grounding is using physical sensations to calm yourself. This can be consciously regulating your breathing, looking around your surroundings, pinching yourself lightly, relaxing your muscles, or using a calming stimuli. Both of these things allow you to regain awareness and control of yourself, your mental state and your awareness when intrusive thoughts make those difficult. Thought, different techniques work for different people, you'll need to figure out what works for you specifically :] we have another suggestion under resources, in our pinned post, as well as the tag intrusive thoughts in our blog!

Intrusive thoughts are distressing, especially when the hint at something that goes against your own experiences and memories, but you absolutely can deal with them. Consider bringing this up to your therapist as well! And good luck :] - mod Hakki

#trauma talks #trauma details #mod hakki #intrusive thoughts #tw alcohol abuse #tw abuse mention #Reid anon

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janeyseymour · 3 years

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me shitting on my shithead ex

TWs: abuse, domestic violence, manipulation, panic attacks, probably others... so if this doesn't sound like something you wanna read, feel free to skip.

it’s literally just me bitching about my shithead ex. Mum is not “Mum” here. I’m a cold, bitter person in this. I let my rage out, and truly channel a bitch here.

Alright listen up mama has a lot of ✨trauma✨

Sooooo…. My life is one big trauma and I love that for me lmao

My family life was shit for a while, and I was a whole shitshow in myself until… well I’m still a shitshow honestly, but uh, we can dive into that another time if you want lmao I have enough baggage to share with this story right here. My family situation is a whole other story lmaoooooooooo

Well, senior year I meet this boy. And he was real sweet (this is shithead ex).

We dated for 2 1/2 years. 2 1/2 very long years. I wore rose tinted glasses for the first year and a half. Like I said, he was sweet.

Well, for the first 9 months that we dated, he didn’t have a job. He ended up getting a job at a local deli… only to lose said job 2 months later. For the next however long we dated, mans went through 5 other jobs… dick’s sporting goods, a waitress at a local restaurant, real estate agent, caretaker of dogs, and finally working with his father who said if he wasn’t his son he would have fired him too.

Mans also “went to college” for a semester, failed, and told me that he didn’t know why he wasn’t getting his grades… man didn’t attend classes, didn’t pay for said classes and failed… that’s why.

I was able to overlook this for a while. 1 1/2 years actually.

Well, rose tinted glasses came off on my 19th birthday. My friends wanted to hang out, and he literally stopped me from going. I wasn’t allowed to see my friends because “I don’t like your friends” okay well I didn’t fucking ask… “You’re gonna fuck them” … no I’m not??? They’re like my brothers, and I was in love with him… not them??

All we did was fight from then on… things like “you’re not allowed to wear that… other boys will look at you…” “why would you wear that out? you look like a whore” “why do you insist on eating healthy can’t we just get a burger and be done” “you shouldn’t drink all of that coffee it's bad for you” “why cant you ever stay awake?” “you’re letting yourself go.” “are you fucking kidding me”

Manipulation was strong. I tried to leave so many times but couldn’t. It was the “I can’t live without you babe” and “No one would ever love someone as broken as you”

I was abused for the last year of that relationship because I was so scared that I wasn’t good enough and I would never be capable of being loved again. Because well, he loved me, right? If I left… I don’t really know. (LMAO I really am Jane in this way… and he truly was my HenRat)

And then it got physical. I was going to school full-time, working crazy amounts of hours at my job, and really only had time to see him late at night after work. We would settle in on his couch, and I would either do homework or we would watch television. He didn’t like when I did homework. Oftentimes when we would watch tv, I would fall asleep. I was EXHAUSTED. 18 credits worth of school and babysitting and working at a gym almost full time is a hard feat, let me tell you. He didn’t like that. He would shake me awake. Now, I don’t bruise. I just have a skin complexion where I dont bruise. I would fucking bruise… and he knew it. I would tell him it hurt me. He would do the usual “oh baby I’m so sorry it won’t happen again” only for it to happen again. This led to panic attacks... terrible anxiety.

And then it was the “come on babe we never do anything anymore” to which I would reply with “can we please just not? I’m tired and I just want to relax”… and he wouldn’t take it for an answer. Rough nights for me… physically, mentally, emotionally.

It took me a year to get out of that relationship. Now, for being as young as I am… that’s a long time. Covid hit, we were all quarantined, and I stopped seeing him (even though I was working in public) because “my dad is high risk”. Best two weeks of my life, not having to see him. I didn’t FaceTime him, I barely even talked to him other than “morning” and “goodnight” texts. I drove to his house one day after work and literally said “we can’t keep doing this. We’re both miserable, and I can’t do this anymore. We have to break up.” And I drove away and never looked back. And I don’t regret it one bit. I do regret not getting out of that relationship sooner.

That being said, it has left me royally fucked. I see every red flag, every hint of any red flag, and I refuse to put myself in that situation again.

I’m genuinely content with the progress I’ve made on myself, and I refuse to let anyone ruin the progress I’ve made.

So, thank you shithead ex for more trauma to add onto my already extensive list of traumatic things that have happened to me. You truly deserve to get wrecked, and I am so much better off without you. I’m better than I ever thought I could be. truly, get fucked.

Despite all of the absolute SHIT I’ve been put through in this very short time I’ve been alive, I still do my best to come out of it stronger, better, and with as much love in my heart as I can (although I guess it’s pretty ironic i say this considering this is just one big rant about how I fucking hate someone)

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pr-3-ttyk-1-tty · 3 years

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vent-

i think i maybe understand why i feel so guilty all the time. im surrounded by people who have really really hard lives, and i dont. im very very privileged, im white, im middle class, i dont need a job, my college is paid for, my car and phone are paid for, i have two loving parents and a very healthy relationship, im not diagnosed with any mental disorders, my life is really really good and im so so sooo thankful for everything i have and everyone in my life, and i recognize that not everyone is as privileged as me and i do my damn best to put myself in everyone elses' shoes and never judge, and always be there for people who need/want it.

but the problem is that everyone in my life has such hard problems to deal with.

my mother: has depression, binge eating disorder, had a really hard childhood, moved away from her family at age 20 with my dad, who was not right for her, lives with only me and her dog since shes divorced, doesnt have enough money to attend her aunt's funeral in a month, has blood clots in her lungs, and is just generally anxious

my dad: an immigrant, was poor af twice in his life, took on all the debt after the divorce, his mom doesnt want to see him, his dad doesnt want to see him, probably has lots of trauma that he hasnt told me about, his best (and only) friend went to jail for a crime he did not commit

my boyfriend: has really really emotionally abusive parents, bad grades, bad work ethic, wants to move out but cant save money for shit, grandparents are also lowkey abusive, used to have anorexia, now is overweight and hes struggling with that

friend A: has a really really bad eating disorder and depression and anxiety among many other things, has bad relationship with their father

friend D: also has really bad relationships with their father, mother, stepmother, and sisters, works 2 jobs, stressed af all the time, they're black, which results in lots of racism from customers

friend J: also has lots of mental issues, has to work, has really bad trauma and ptsd, has autism (not that there is anything wrong with that, but they vent a lot about how it can be difficult and how there is so much negative stigma), also has an eating disorder

other friends in general: have to work to pay for their own phones, cars, rent, etc. some have eating disorders and talk about it constantly, some have little siblings to watch over, no free time ever, sleep deprived, etc. etc.

the point is, as you can see, i go through nothing compared to everyone in this list, and while im so so thankful for the life i have, i feel like i can never talk about how i feel because i truly do go through nothing compared to everyone else. and yes "drowning in 2 feet and drowning in 20 feet is still drowning" yeah okay but ,,, i just wish i could help everyone so that i wont feel bad about asking them for help, but i cant help everyone, i cant help anyone because this is their life and i cant change it, and this is my life and i cant change it either.

#disordered eating #i do not support eds #ed struggles #weightloss #coping #vent #anorexia #eating disorder #venting #thoughts #ed vent

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sweet-xoxo-thatcares · 3 years

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Roomie/Bro

So I got a roommate....well I haven't moved in yet.

um...idk if I should tell them im not used to sharing my personal space with others outside of my family.

Other than university dorms, I thought I would bee making enough after college to live alone. But yea, shit happens.

But what if they ask why my shorts look so lumpy if I get that craving to wear a diaper again on my period?

Or if they hear me talking to myself to try and calm me down while spooning and caressing my head and my chest?

There's a lot of self therapy I had to do to get through living with my mom and my grandma.

And yea, I still do them cause it made me feel safe to be alone, finally, at those times to emotionally release any pent up frustrations without someone telling me to shut up or go be quiet. It was annoying at how these ladies never truly knew how much pain and suffering I was in on the inside and shut off my voice to keep peace for them.

But what was love to them, if being me meant bringing my walls down only to get hurt, and me being insane and emotionally chaotic and unresolved...was some magic secret I kept hidden at how angry I would get.

I think I'll keep myself at a distance from my roommate even though we already seem to have so much in common gender wise and interests in history, music, cooking, and gaming. I don't want it to get weird if my separation anxiety kicks in so heavy from my parents and I start to freak out in front of them.

I wonder will they judge me too or actually reassure me that they're not gonna reject me for being different.

I finally got in touch with a therapist program to help pay for my visits for free, so we'll see how it goes. Also, he/they seemed very nice at understanding my trauma I've experienced with my parents as they went through emotional abuse before too from parents/family.

Im scared, but its a good kind of scared. Being away from mom and dad for too long makes me homesick, but I'll also miss my room on the 3rd floor near the attic.

Im glad my dad approved of it too, at 1st he said I didn't need to roommate and that I should just look for an apartment alone. But pontiac has noooooooooooooooooooo and i mean none available to even rent in, not even Auburn Hills that I could have afforded.

So I would have been stuck to check again for next year. Cause even the waitlists they had were already full. Thats bad when there's so many more ppl looking for a home or apt to rent and cant afford the higher ones at 900 or 1,000. Plus not many available either. Im pretty sure tenants are just staying and renewing their leases cause there's no where else available unless you go alllllll the way to Detroit or maybe Southfield.

Why the hell was it so easy to find apartments and low income housing in Grand Rapids, with a high ass real estate housing market, but in poor ass pontiac aint worth finding shit.

No way in hell was I finna just wait till January. I need an out asap before Thor and Thunder reunite my mother's hand.

Holidays are coming up and everyone in the house gets anxious and more irritable around this time of year....especially my father will be too because of his 1st christmas and thanksgiving without his mom.

I would be crying too, no matter what beef we had.

But he's a big guy, likes to hold in his pain, not even acknowledge it, like he's some cosmic robot.

You cant solve everything on your own Dad. Its ok to admit that you're hurt. You're allowed to feel, you're allowed to be in pain, you're supposed to be sad. Its ok to be sad and feel alone sometimes. Cause I feel it too. That need to not be alone this time of year, but because of a different reason.....Jay's not here and sure as hell wasn't last year Christmas either, no halloween, no happy birthday.....nothing. Not until mid-January with the most dickass response to me pouring my heart out to them 3 months before that.

Cliche. I was better off leaving and not saying anything. Cause she didn't care. And it showed. Who responds to somebody that left them, 3 months ago by saying "Did you send these long ass messages?"

That was the most irresponsible, inconsiderate, inhumane bullshit I ever heard. I wanted to knock their teeth out till bloody mary. Thats how pissed off I was at the lack of care and consideration for my feelings and even to what I had to say. And i said a lot of deep shit from my fucking heart, and this bitch didn't give a fuck. Dry ass, fake ass friend, fake ass love. She didn't care, cause it showed and still does...

Thats why I blocked her right after she sent that bullshitty ass text. And I was already miserable a few days before that text, because I kept dreaming about her and crying and cussing and yelling and screaming because I was so in love with her and yet i was in so much pain for being rejected and leaving her alone. Imissed her a whole hell of a lot more than how much she missed me.

And it showed because she's a dick, now a changed man, with a small dick. Who still acts like an even bigger dick to match the small dick they already had as a packer in their motherfucking jeans for desperate attention.

Yea Im glad im moving out, making a new friend, and not alone on the holidays this year. And im finally getting over that girl, that traitor. Im leaving him alone and moving on with my life, so i can be happy and stop being mad after a year of being angry at her ,her fiancé, my mom, my family, and God himself too.

I need a break and Jesus knows.

Better yet a vacation. Away from hell in Michigan.

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slashingdisneypasta · 4 years

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Jason Voorhees x Freddy’sDaughter!Reader || Oneshot

Title: They Cuddles; Him, Her, and her Bottle of Hypnocil.

Notes:

‘-There was something in her, something that was… pure horror. Everything you were supposed to watch out for. Heights, fire, shards of glass, snakes. Everything that his mom tried so hard to keep him safe from.’ - John Ajvide Lindqvist.

Inspired by the above quote.

Quick Background of Reader: You’re Maggies younger (Only a little) half-sister. (You were conceived and born shortly after he killed Loretta and your mother didn’t want you so you were pawned off to him so you were living with him until he was burnt by the Springwood Parents, whereas Maggie was of course taken away) (Pretend it was years between the time he was caught and the time he was killed)

Tried to write in Jasons POV, not sure how good it is, hah.

I miiiiiiight have some ideas for future parts of this, this was adorable and sweet.

Plot:

Just, Jason falling in so love with the enemies daughter who is so like her father - she’s loud, she’s hurt, she makes s t u p i d jokes and then laughs way too hard at them, she’s dangerous, - but who is gentle with him and kind. (She’s basically the type of girl Pam wouldn’t approve of at first but is so honest and kind that Pam cant help but begrudgingly like her eventually XD )

Warnings: Age gap? I mean it’s not a main plot point so you could ignore it but Jason and Freddy are similar in age so you’re young enough to be Jason’s kid too- but you’re in your 30’s-40’s so its okie. Fatherly trauma (Is that the right phrase?? Hah. You know what I mean) / Nightmare on elm Street survivor trauma also. Panic attack I think? Ends in fluff ^^

~~~

When you stayed a night in your van at that old, abandoned camp, you certainly didn’t expect to meet Jason. I mean, you weren’t surprised by his… abnormalities -referring to the fact that he’s dead. Not his deformities, - as much as you were how cute and sweet he was. And how well you two got on, after he tried to kill you.

And you don’t blame him for that! You trespassed; you get it. If you had known he was there and he had taken ownership of the area, then you would have asked before parking there.

When Jason had found a girl hidden away, sleeping in the back of a yellow van, he certainly didn’t expect that she would soon become so important to him. She was just another trespasser acting like a hoodlum -living! In! A! Van?! – in his general vicinity and of course, he didn’t like that.

Boring chase story short; He pushed your van over and there was a chase through the forest (You’ve never run that fast in your life, jesus christ. You can still feel the wind burn on your cheeks, that one rock under your bare feet that cut you and the energy rushing through your body pushing you forward anyway) and you leapt into the lake- waiting until he came in after you. And then when he did, you just screamed random nonsense, splashing around spastically at him until you hit a nerve that sobered him (Something about his mother). This is a technique you developed after you were given up to various foster homes after your father was burnt to death (And then also when he found you again) when stinky foster parents, foster siblings, bullies at school rando’s off the street wanted to put their hands on you, and that you mastered since. It works, evidently, with asexual zombie monsters too.

After that, you went back to your van and rap up your foot, thinking that at least the lake water cleaned up the cut on your foot, and then grumpily set up your bed on your window now since the van (Poor, dear Mandy) is now on its side thanks to the local undead jerk!

You hadn’t slept a wink the rest of that night, not because of the hulking mass of rotten flesh and a hockey mask that you knew was lurking somewhere close by, watching you, but because you weren’t about to waste an extra Hypnocil pill in one night. You just laid there, pillows propping you up and being bored. Staring at the ceiling, smearing various ugly pastel shades onto a page in your sketchbook, listening to the woods and imagining getting rawed by Danny Zuko were highlights. Then, when daylight finally broke out, you were finally, unhappily wondering how you were going to get Mandy back on her wheels, zipping up your jacket and looking at your beautiful pale-yellow Volkswagen.

You thinking what pain this would be to correct… and then having turned on your heel and went on a trek to the closest town to get some kind of breakfast. Procrastinating the inevitable.

When you had returned, a bag of groceries in your arms -drink propped on top of everything else so you could sip through the straw as you walked,- , your van was back on her wheels.

You don’t know what it was about you that made him do that, that made him stop and not kill you, and its likely you’ll never find out since he doesn’t talk, after that you had gone directly to find the - cute, now, -behemoth you knew fixed it for you, to make and give him fairy bread to say thank you and sorry for what happened last night- and honestly you’ve been friendly ever since. More then friendly, after a while, but never less then.

___TIME SKIP: Current time now. Months and months after you met___

~ POV Change~

Oh my god.

The second I see that the familiar bottle, the one from Typo with the Coca Cola logo on it that reminds me absolutely zero percent of my father that I keep Hypnocil pills in is not where I left it, a deep sense of dread and anxiety fills me up to the brim- only proceeding to grow outwards to the air around me as I search in an increasingly more panicked fashion for the thing. Where is it!? Where is it, where is it, where is it. “Where, where, where, where, where, where- “

I fling a pillow out the back of the van and am just bundling up the blankets, not caring what else goes with it to push out as well so I can find that fucking bottle when I notice Jason standing there at the back doors watching me, head tilted. I immediately stop what I’m doing, heart stopping for a second. “Lost something.” Is all I can squeak out.

He leans forward and I watch as I bends down so his head and upper body are in here with me and looks around, then up at me again as if to ask what I’m looking for so he can help me. “I-Its, um… “ My voice trembles. I need to find that bottle- the fact that Jason is being so sweet and offering to help me look just makes me feel even less together. I could cry. “A r-red bottle with umm, curly writing on it?” He probably doesn’t remember what coke is, much less the logo…

He nods, and starts looking around, eyes focused and slow as the graze along everything in the van so studiously that I stay extra still instead of helping- so he doesn’t miss anything with that super-vision he’s acting like he must have. The vans a mess and I’m just kneeling in the corner, against the driver’s seat with the blankets all bundles up in my lap, worrying my bottom lip and waiting for this man to save me. Please, jesus- help me. Save me.

A moment later and I’m about to slowly move from my place and Jason suddenly moves. His heavy arm shoots forward and pulls the bottle, a tubular shock of red, out of a nook between my portable DVD player/screen and some books and I was showing him earlier, offering it to me.

Dropping the blankets and sitting on them instead, feeling the softness on my bare legs and taking the bottle from him before hugging it to my chest and covering my face with my hands, silently.

Oh my god.

~POV Change~

Y/N curls up on herself, hiding her face and the bottle between her legs and her tummy and doesn’t make much noise except a quick, quiet whimper. She’s acting different, in a bad way. Why isn’t she talking to him, Jason wonders? Why isn’t she being loud? Is she okay?

Looking around the van, because he has to go in there and see if she’s okay- get her out of that body-cocoon, Jason crawls into the vehicle that he’s never dared to touch since the first night they met, and it breathes under his weight a little bit. He sits down next to her, crossing his legs and watching her for a while. What… to do… now… hmm…

Finally, he decides putting his hand on her shoulder might work to get her attention at least, and she does relax her shoulders quickly at the contact. Then looks up, face red, at him before wiping her face again and crawling suddenly into his lap. She takes a deep breath, regaining some of her usual colour and composure as Jason just sits solid and c o m p l e t e l y still beneath her, flashing him a quick, toothless smile. “Thank you for finding this Jason, it’s important to me.” She looks at the bottle in her hands, not wanting to put it down and risk losing it again even as she knows its irrational that she would do it twice in a row. “Its… how I keep him away… “

Y/N looks up at Jason, eyebrows risen up her forehead to watch him cautiously, worriedly, looking for signs. Did he understand what you were talking about? And if so, is he okay at the mention of your father?

He’s just completely unmoving still. Y/N blinks at the utter lack of responce. “Jason?”

When she still doesn’t receive a response, she taps his mask gently. “Jaaaason?”

That gets his attention, as he looks down at her face… and nods. A wonky smile that makes his somehow-still-beating heart flutter weirdly appears on her face and she looks outside instead. “So, what did you come to see me for? Ya just missed me? Hah, I missed you too cutie. How about we go for a walk? Its pretty today- ah.” When Jason’s big arms suddenly, slowly take action and wrap heavily around her, she’s pleasantly surprised. Her anxieties and panic from earlier all but slip from their knot in her chest and disappear at the action, and she responds by turning properly to her side in his lap so she can lean into his chest. “Oor we could cuddle. That sounds better anyway!~”

She taps the side of his face affectionately before closing her eyes, and he lets his own half lid themselves at the feeling of her so close to him. She’s so cute and warm. Its weird, but he thinks- if someone were to come right now in this moment, and not be loud and not do anything to Y/N or him… he would probably let them go.

(Well at least until he let her go.)

#Jason Voorhees x Reader Oneshot #Oneshot #Jason Voorhees #Freddy Krueger #Oneshots #Jason Voorhees x Reader

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