#and then that can lead to annoyed 'well actually *your* interpretation has a bunch of racist / homophobic implications???'

[ladyluscinia]

Not going to put this directly on the long discussion chain that prompted it because it's somewhat topic adjacent at best and I have no intention of derailing a discussion of fandom racism, but - while reading some of the "Izzy critical" responses that @bromelads got - I did see mention of one thing that I have both passionate feelings about and a near constant desire to elaborate some oft ignored context for. So.

One of the things mentioned as a source of discomfort in fandom for "Izzy critical" poc was posts rejecting that Edward was growing or healing in 1x09 and 1x10, suggesting that it mostly serves to empathize with Izzy over Ed and to make Izzy's actions look better at the expense of Ed's character / softness. The same person who gave this example later agreed that there's some truth in the idea that Izzy crits' misinterpretation of Izzy fan meta has something to do with the (very baffling) perception that we all don't like Ed or think he's the simplified villain of Izzy's story or something, which I just want to a) appreciate for a second because I do actually adore Edward so much, and b) mention specifically because I think the whole Ed healing debate is a great example of that.

I'm not going to argue why I am staunchly in the "Ed wasn't healing" / "Kraken was inevitable" camp because I've done it before, but I do want to point out some related thoughts around that argument that I've picked up on each time it loops back around.

I feel like a lot of the people who strongly disagree with or get mad about that take frame it as though we are minimizing or rejecting the existence of Edward's softness entirely. It's like... Ok, so there is a distinct sequence of moments where Edward is displaying emotional vulnerability or a draw toward fine things that fans noticed, and then they interpreted the pink robe Ed's "healing" as all that starting to pay off in his character development (before being interrupted by an external obstacle: Izzy). A very straightforward A -> B. Only when I push back against B and say "hold on I don't see any healing in 1x10," then I feel like people hear me rejecting that all the moments of A meant anything at all. If I see the shadow of the Kraken as an internally motivated obstacle being built in earlier episodes, then I must think that's the dark and violent payoff, and the evidence of softness was a diversion or manipulation or just not going anywhere significant in character terms.

Which is very frustrating to me because Edward is a romcom protagonist.

Yes, this is very obvious to everyone. But it matters in this debate because protagonist status comes with very significant guarantees - namely, Edward is going to grow / heal / get his happy ending, etc. We've even got Stede's S1 arc (which remember is still unfinished too) as a good example of structure and focus on internalized character flaws framed by plot hurdles. There is no version of this story arc where Edward ends as the Kraken, and I have never seen anybody suggest he's not currently on a character arc toward growth and healing and a circle of true companions in Stede's crew who love him for who he is.

So when I or anyone else says he's not there yet, it's almost exclusively because we are arguing about where he is on this character arc in 1x10. Of course the appreciation for fancy clothes and slow mornings with overly sugared tea is going to pay off! Of course he's going to become friends with the crew (I'm rooting for Frenchie S2 bonding)! Of course he's going to get to beat back that self loathing he's carried since his dad! But people get defensive and angry like you are personally targeting them and declaring their blorbo an irredeemable asshole because you suggest character development major enough to drive a character driven show probably takes more than a few weeks of easygoing vacation to reach final form. That's not what I'm saying at all!

Interpretations upsetting or offending people even when written with a complete lack of malice is nothing new, but it really seems like making up a whole army of guys to get mad at for takes is happening more and more. (And I'll admit I'm probably getting more and more guilty of this myself as my understanding of what exactly people are arguing in different fandom city states gets more and more fractured. Meta builds off of meta, and if you randomly see one post by one blog you already disagree with, you might be missing a lot of context to clarify what they actually mean vs "of course that's the awful take you would have".)

#our flag means death #also since i am addressing a very specific style of accusation let me tack on a disclaimer #there are a lot of lists / vagues / rebuttal metas / etc. floating around by izzy crits that attribute izzy fans' 'problematic' takes #to not unpacking their racism / homophobia or whatever. all of which come up every time this discussion does #and plenty of those takes (like maybe this one?) izzy fans read and go 'are you kidding me? agree with my dumb take or you're racist???' #and then that can lead to annoyed 'well actually *your* interpretation has a bunch of racist / homophobic implications???' #(see the entire 'woobifying ed is racist' vs 'making ed violent is racist' debate) #so just for the record: fandom has problems but i *don't* think accusing wide swaths of meta of being driven by unconscious bigots helps #obviously no take is immune from criticism but unfortunate implications happen and all poc aren't a hive mind to pass judgement #i'm far more likely to assume an izzy crit's takes suck because they are boring and have bad taste than i am to figure racism into it #ofmd harassment #< technically #ofmd meta #blackbeard ofmd #edward teach #ofmd 1x10 #ladyluscinia

[thoughts-on-bangtan]

Five Hall of Shame Asks

Since these few amused me, but also made me go ??? I thought I’d share (a trigger warning though applies for the last ask but I’ll detail it beforehand again). But especially with the first and third one, like, in how many different ways do I have to reiterate that regardless of argument, unless it’s something completely new and an angle that has never been argued/made before, besides vmin I do not see any other maknae ship as romantic, past, present, future. I’ve been ARMY long enough that I know enough to have a solid opinion and these types of asks? They are not helping your case, at all. Which I’ve also already said a bunch of times. And I’m only giving you an “answer” because I thought I was funny (in the first half of the answer to anon number 1), so I’ll post it.

From anon: It always baffles me how so many blogs entirely miss and ignore the possibility of j*k*ok being real despite all the evidence and proof to their relationship but people would hold onto a thin thread called Vmin or t*ek*ok, especially the former being a pair of soulmates that have never try to romanticize their bond.

It baffles me how so many people/shippers entirely miss and ignore the possibility of staying on their side of the shipper universe, celebrate the bond you ship, and leave people who ship something else be. But people would hold on to a thin thread called "I must convince everyone of my thing because otherwise my thing isn't real (enough)" which they do because they crave validation that they don't see “minding their own business” as viable option especially when the former would mean others will continue to not see their thing as romantic.

Oh, and, 95z is Love. 

No, but, seriously, anon, what did you think you’ll achieve with an ask like this? I don’t know, and I don’t actually want to know. This is a OT7 as well as vmin and namjin blog, and since that isn’t what you’re after, I would advise you to seek out any of the j*k*ok blogs on this platform who hold the same opinion as you do, and there are plenty to choose from.

Lastly, their bonds are not a competition, not a game of compare and contrast. We (as in people participating in the shipper universe) aren’t a court, judge and jury, we’re just fans with (more or less informed) opinions.

From anon: Vmin are the best brothers. Jimin was born to be worshipped and owned by jungkook.

...I’m sorry, is Jimin some kind of deity to be worshipped or an object you can own? I know this is like the bad boy language that gets people all fuzzy in really bad “romance” movies about your typical alpha male, but in real life? Unless that’s the sort of relation you’re after, you do not own your partner. Or your friends. Or anyone. Owning someone is a sign of possessive behavior and that, in most if not all, cases does not lead to long or healthy, in any kind of way, relationships.

From anon: JMs sabotaged his own relationship with V because of JK. Its so clear. There's only so much a person can give & take & seems like V has slowly been pulling back from JM even tho he still very much loves JM. I feel like crying. I've been watching this unfold for a year now. Where there's Vmin there's JK. Yes they're family/friends, but JK interjected himself in the middle of Vmin. Whether it was on purpose cause he felt left out and wanted attention or if its because JK developed feelings for JM.

If you claim the issue is JK, how is it then that it’s Jimin who supposedly sabotaged his own relationship with Tae? The logic doesn’t quite make sense to me. Also, based on everything we’ve seen during PERMISSION TO DANCE on Stage last weekend, I really don’t know how you can interpret any of it as Tae pulling away from Jimin, or vmin not being close anymore, or their relationship having been sabotaged.

Furthermore, since this is a Hall of Shame post I can admit that these kinds of Teen Drama 101 “plots” are annoying me more and more because they keep on coming and it just feels like people purposefully don’t consider anything but their own need and craving for drama. As I’ve said many times before, despite how much shippers want to portray JK as some kind of possessive, overly jealous, intrusive and obsessive asshole, that isn’t who he is. At all. Which I’ve written about many times before (here and here). And also, despite how much shippers want to present JKs “choice” as being strictly limited to he either has to be with Jimin or he has to be with Tae, because apparently he can’t just be friends with both, but that’s not how life works, how relationships and friendships work, and it’s also completely nonsensical.

JK is their dongsaeng, and he’s Bangtan’s maknae. He is two years younger than Tae and Jimin, and despite Tae offering (years ago) for JK to drop the honorifics and thus becoming his equal, JK rejected the idea both in Tae’s and Jimin’s case for the sake of their dynamic and friendship (here’s a whole post by the marvelous romanticdrift about JK and honorifics). 

In Korea, and I say this cautiously since this is based on research so if any Korean ARMY are reading our blog please do send in an ask if this is right, the younger person in a friendship is the one who will always be “unequal” to the older half to a certain degree. Actions that have been interpreted as romantic by shippers, like JK carrying Jimin’s shopping bags in Malta (BV3), they are simply something dictated by culture/age hierarchy (and him wanting to be a good friend). JK, as the younger, is, in a way, obliged to help his hyungs. We’ve even seen that in the most recent ITS episode where, after breakfast, Hobi says he’ll clean up since he was the only one who didn’t cook, but JK says he feels weird with that since he is the youngest, as in, due to his age he should be the one to clean up despite having cooked. Or when Yoongi “asked” him to took dinner with him, JK first apologized that he’s too exhausted to do so, and yet ultimately he still joined him and cooked.

Just like Jimin and Tae are chingu, as well as Namjoon and Hobi, JK also has his chingu in form of his 97z squad. People with whom he has matching tattoos to honor/celebrate their bond, and his friends even sometimes post pictures wearing the same clothes as JK.

Whatever vmin have or don’t have, it has nothing to do with JK. They both love him as their maknae, their youngest friend, and they are close to him in different ways because people have different dynamics with different people. As I said earlier, their bonds are not a competition, not a game of compare and contrast, and JK loves his hyungs, all of them, in different ways and also shows it in different ways, ones which are adjusted to each hyung (a post about his bonds with Hobi, Yoongi, and Seokjin). As much as he can hug Jimin or Tae, because they like hugs, he won’t hug Yoongi or Namjoon in the same way because that isn’t their preferred “love language”. Or as “rough” as he plays with Seokjin, because that’s part of their dynamic, he won’t do the same with Hobi. Or while JK will jokingly pretend he’ll pull down Jimin’s pants (ITS season 1, one of the earlier episodes), Tae will do the same with JK (ITS season 1, one of the later episodes), but Tae won’t do something like that with Jimin, because it isn’t part of their dynamic, and JK wouldn’t do it with Namjoon or Yoongi for the same reason.

You also have to keep in mind that we have a very limited view on their interactions and dynamics, the time we see compared to the length of a year is basically nothing. All we have to go by are their own words and the bits and pieces we see, everything else is a guessing game. 

Anon, I have no idea what kind of development you think you’ve been observing for the past year, or what led you to interpret things in such a manner, but as someone who has been here a long time (how many times have I repeated that so far since our first posts?) I truly have no idea where you’re getting any of this from. Yes, JKs bonds with Tae and Jimin have changed and evolved, just like Tae’s and Jimin’s bond has evolved and strengthened, but none of it has anything to do with whatever you think it does. At least that is my opinion. You don’t have to subscribe to it, but since this is our blog, all I can do for you is give you my opinion so there you have it.

From anon: Do you dislike straight people?

I mean this in the most sarcastic way known to human kind: yes.

Trigger warning for the following ask (below the cut) for those who might prefer not to read a statement following the opener “I’m not homophobic but...” since it does sound rather (very) homophobic. Stay safe!

From anon: I’m not homophobic but I always wonder how bts members parents feel watching their sons and pride behave in such way with each other’s. So sexual 24/7. 

Especially Tae and Jin and Jimin with Jk or even sometimes Vmin. 

Everyone calls them the pride of SK but how will these people feel one day when they find out that they loved and supported such gay guys for years. I feel bts should reduce these behaviors. It’s so embarrassing watching their content with family sometimes, they’re literally rubbing on each other’s thighs and what not. I pray they’re guided.

You claim to not be homophobic just to then basically bash the members for behaving in a way you think is “too gay” and thus would prefer for them to be “less gay” which, surprise, is homophobic because what, exactly, is “too gay” about any of what they do? If, instead, it was a girl and a guy, would you still feel like they’re doing too much? Or, even better, if it were two girls, would that still be too much?

And I get it, especially if views/fans are coming from countries where this kind of skinship which we see in K-Pop between male idols is rare, it can be a bit surprising at first, and yet at the same time we as an audience somehow have no issue whatsoever with seeing female friendships that are touchy on screen, or romances (or movies/shows in genres where the romance is secondary, supposedly) with straight couples that kiss and feel each other up every other scene. Perhaps they (as in Bangtan and their way of interacting) are not the problem, but what you deem as sexual behavior? Is hugging a friend sexual? Is Tae lying down next to Jimin in bed to take a selca sexual? Is Hobi sharing a bed with JK in their RUN Staycation sexual? Is a shirtless JK hugging Seokjin in his selcas sexual? Or is that just friends who are extremely close and have been with each other 10 years type of close, and all of it simply shows that even men can (and should be allowed to) show affection without it being seen as weird?

You don’t have to like everything they do, but putting the blame on them being (potentially) queer and thus their behavior (according to you it seems) automatically being sexual, that is an issue. And it isn’t their issue, but yours.

If the behavior showcased by idols, as well as BTS, is “too gay” for you, too “sexual” for you, than perhaps K-Pop and its idols are just not for you. Besides, compared to some other things I’ve seen, what Bangtan do is nothing that would step outside of the frame, so to speak. You have to keep in mind cultural and contextual differences, and if they are something that’s too much for you, as viewer, then the only option isn’t to pray for them, but to reflect on your own views and values in that regard. And change who you stan. Because Bangtan won’t and doesn’t have to change unless they want to.

And the BTS parents? They must be proud beyond anyones imagination seeing everything their sons have achieved. The pride they bring to their country, as well as the joy they bring to ARMY and anyone willing to give their music a chance. Bangtan have taught us how to love ourselves, how to love others and be more open minded, so perhaps it’s time for you learn that, too. Or leave. Which sounds mean, yes, but it’s the truth.

Also, great choice to come to a blog co-written by a queer person with an ask like this, bravo.

#hall of shame ask #taehyung #jimin #jungkook #vmin

[minor-solemnity]

Never Gonna Give (You Up) pt.2

(content warning: some smut)

You really should get up.

You should.

You don’t. What you do instead is simple: you kiss him. You bend over his chest, one hand clutching his side the other pressed into the pillow and you kiss him with the fervour that only seven years of bottled up chemistry can conjure.

Riddle is unusually quiet as you lead him away from the party. His eyes are focused firmly on the ground, as though he’s worried that if he doesn’t watch his step, he’ll stumble. You watch him out the corner of your eye, taking in the slight sheen of sweat, the way his skin, save for the raw acid burns on his chest, is even paler than usual, his pinched expression. “You know, I’m surprised you’re not screaming bloody murder,” You say, trying to keep your voice light and casual and not like you’re about to start panicking over the state of his chest. “I always thought Slytherins were a bunch of posh crybabies.”

You suppose it’s good to know that Riddle is not so injured that he can’t summon up the strength to glare at you. “And I always thought that Gryffindors were meant to be chivalrous and honourable but the way you looked when Slughorn asked you escort me to hospital wing suggests otherwise.” He snaps and you feel at once both indignantly angry and… guilty. You feel guilty. And you hate it.

“Oh please, you’d be as annoyed as I was if the roles were reversed. Because of you, I won’t be able to meet Beaufort and having her as a character reference is essential if I even have a hope of becoming a curse-breaker. You know as well as I do what’s waiting for me after Hogwarts otherwise.” You say, all the sorrow and frustration you feel over your missed opportunity leaches into your voice and the grip you have on RIddle’s arm tightens without you meaning to. You’re not wrong either, wizarding society is still of the collective opinion that witches if they’re from a good family should be married off as quickly as possible, and if they’re not, are looking at jobs in retail and teaching. Particularly intelligent and insightful witches might be lucky enough to go into research and academia but generally, any witch wanting to do something a bit more exciting with their life is shit out of luck.

Riddle shoots you a surprised look like he hadn’t expected your response. To your own surprise, he doesn’t have a quippy retort ready to skewer you with and you walk the rest of the way to the entrance hall in stony silence.

You begin to move towards the staircase intent of getting him to the hospital wing as quickly as possible. Your reasons are twofold: firstly, with any luck, once he’s under the care of Madam Montague, you’ll be able to return to the party and hopefully be in time to at least make yourself known to Beaufort; secondly, Riddle, as much as he’s trying to hide it, is clearly in a great deal of pain. The slight tremor in his shoulders has turned into full-body shakes and his eyes, usually so sharp and erudite, are clouded in pain and have a far-away look to them. It’s unsettling to see him so vulnerable. You’ve spent so much of your time at Hogwarts wishing to see Riddle cut down to size but now you’re witnessing it, you find that you’re really not enjoying it.

“Come on, let’s just get to Madam Montague,” You mutter, trying to pull him along but Riddle won’t budge. In fact, he begins to stumble in the opposite direction towards the dungeons. “What are you doing? We have to go to the hospital wing! Riddle, you’re hurt—”

“I’m not going there - I have… I’ll be able to fix this if I can get to my dorm.”

“Oh for Merlin’s sake, you can’t possibly fix this yourself.” You exclaim half exasperated half pleading. He fixes you with a glare that would be a lot more intimidating if, at that moment, he didn’t sway violently on his feet and you weren’t forced to steady him by looping both your arms over his shoulders. Riddle sags into you, his body pressing against you, his forehead resting on your shoulder. The way your stomach clenches at the close proximity is entirely inappropriate.

“Just go back to the party, that’s clearly where you’d rather be,” You think he might be aiming for scathing but something horribly vulnerable has crept into his words. “Beaufort’s probably still there.”

The fact that Riddle is allowing you to leave, to enjoy the rest of your night, to maybe secure a job is… You feel… Odd. Confused. Sad. Sad that he thinks that you’d leave him to stumble back to his dorm on his own. For the first time since you’ve known him, you wonder if he’s ever had someone to rely on before. If the air of self-sufficiency and aloofness is something that comes naturally to him, or if it’s something he’s had to learn.

“Don’t be ridiculous. You can barely stand up by yourself; I’m not going to leave you to potentially faint on your way to your dorm.” When you disentangle yourself from him and resume your journey and he makes a small noise in the back of his throat that you will not for the sake of your sanity interpret as disappointment. “Like you said: Gryffindors: known for our chivalry and honour.” And he must be delirious because he actually laughs.

The Slytherin common room is exactly what you imagined it would be: dark, luxurious, refined, and so unlike the cosiness of the Gryffindor tower. Thankfully, Riddle’s room is empty when you’re finally inside. He pulls off his ruined dress robes, leaving him only in his trousers. You avert your eyes out of respect for his privacy and not because the sight of his lithe torso is at all appealing. He manages to get to his bed and starts rummaging around in the chest of drawers beside it, leaving you standing in the doorway, entirely unsure of what it is that you’re supposed to do next.

Jar in hand, he more or less collapses onto his bed. Wounded as he is, he still manages to look outrageously good. The low light from the candelabra casts him in a muted, golden glow, adding colour to his complexion and softening the wounds on his chest. You swallow thickly and internally berate yourself for having such thoughts because this is Riddle, and even if he weren’t your sworn enemy, he’s still injured and hurting and that should be your first priority.

You watch as he struggles to open one of the jars for a second before you make up your mind. Summoning every shred of Gryffindor bravery you possess, you walk towards him, ignoring the look of sheer surprise and alarm that settles on his face as you stop in front of him. “Here, just let me— let me help,” You murmur, your breath catching in your throat because this feels… This feels intimate and new. You’re fairly sure that whatever happens next, your relationship with Riddle has been changed irrevocably. The seconds tick past and you just watch each other. The air seems to thicken around you and the atmosphere grows charged and tense with something that you don’t have a name for.

Slowly, he nods and you gently manoeuvre him so that he’s lying on his back, propped up by his pillows. Next, you reach for the jar that he’d been holding, unscrewing the lid and scooping some of the clear, jelly-like substance into your fingers. There’s an awkward moment when you try and figure out the best way of reaching his chest before you grit your teeth and straddle his hips.

Despite his current state, Riddle still manages to look far too smug for your liking. He raises an eyebrow and smirks up at you from your perch on his thighs. Despite the furious blush that creeps up your neck and along your cheeks, you manage to keep your voice steady as you say, “Don’t make this weird, Riddle.” He starts to chuckle lowly before it’s cut off by a gasp as you start to rub the salve on his wounds.

Your fingers brush against his chest and you find yourself entranced by how warm his skin is, how he tenses under your hands as though he wasn’t expecting and isn’t used to gentleness, how his breathing slowly evens out as the salve does its job and the burns start to scab and heal. A slow, curling heat wraps its way around you, making your heart stutter and your blood thrum in a way that is so deliciously intoxicating that you don’t even notice that your hands have travelled down his chest and are now skimming his sides, edging lower and lower to the waistline of his trousers.

You’re brought back to reality when he wraps a hand around one of your wrists, his dark eyes glitter in the dim candlelight and a slow, easy smirk curls his upper lip. He moves his free hand to your waist and he watches you closely, taking in every twitch, every shiver, every sharp, stuttering intake of breath. “So, I should go and let you rest…?” You hate the way it comes out as a question, the slight upturn in your voice revealing the nerves that tangle and twist inside you.

“That would be sensible, yes,” Tom agrees, even as his hand slides up your waist and along the curves of your breasts.

You really should get up.

You should.

You don’t. What you do instead is simple: you kiss him. You bend over his chest, one hand clutching his side the other pressed into the pillow and you kiss him with the fervour that only seven years of bottled up chemistry can conjure. He responds immediately, let’s go of your wrist to tangle his fingers through your hair, drags you closer until the spaces between you are taken over by the feeling of his body, firm and solid and sure beneath you. His other hand slips under your dress robes, gliding up your thigh and pulling the silky fabric up until it’s bunched around your waist and his hand splays across the swell of your arse, exploring and gripping and kneading. Every part of you that he touches is on fire and pleasure curls inside of you like bonfire smoke: rich and thick and all-consuming.

A moan escapes you as he rolls his hips against yours and he tugs your hair sending small shockwaves of muted pain and pleasure tingling down your spine. You pull away from him to catch your breath and for a moment you just stare at each other. His eyes are nearly all pupil and there’s a delectable flush spreading across his cheeks and there’s something else as well. It’s the way he’s looking at you, you realise. Turned on and hot and wanting, yes, but under all that… there’s something like awe in his eyes.

That alone is enough to make you reach down and start tugging at his belt, hands fumbling with nerves and then he’s kicking off his trousers and you’re pulling your robes above your head with a frantic kind of desperation that would surprise you if it wasn’t so fucking obvious to you now. The opposite of love is not hate, but indifference and you have never been indifferent towards Riddle. Your clothes land in a haphazard pile at the foot of his bed, and suddenly his arms are around you and he’s flipping you over and pressing against you, grinding down as he sucks a bruise along the underside of your jaw before trailing kisses down your neck and along your collarbones, flicking his tongue over the sensitive bud of one nipple. “So good,” He whispers into your skin, “Always knew you’d be so good for me.” And something inside of you sings at the admission, at the implication.

The franticness of earlier fades into something slower, though no less intense, and you take the opportunity to snake your hand down his body and curl a fist around him, stroking long and slow, revelling in the way he feels in your hand: heavy and hot and thick in. You are rewarded by a quiet, broken gasp and his fingers and tongue caressing every part of you he can reach. His fingers slip between your legs and you’re already so close to edge that all it takes is a few clever strokes and you’re tumbling into the ravine, back arching, toes curling and you’re dimly aware of him tensing above you and then he’s falling right along with you.

In the moments following, anxiety and uncertainty begins to creep through your afterglow, and you shift against him, unsure if you should gather your things and leave. You start to push yourself up but are stopped by a hand on your shoulder. Tom (because you should start calling him that, anything else feels like an erasure of what’s just happened, and despite the worry, you don’t want to erase this) gently pulls you back down, tucking you against his side as he runs his fingers through your hair. The anxiety fades and you fall asleep with your head nestled in the crook of his neck and his arm curled around your waist.

***

In the three weeks since Slughorn’s party, you’ve made several appearances in Tom’s dorms. There had been one particularly embarrassing moment when Abraxas Malfoy had walked in, rolled his eyes and muttered ‘finally. But also, gross’ before he'd made a speedy exit after Tom had threatened to poison his favourite peacock. 

You still argue and you’re still horribly competitive; you’re fairly sure that those aspects of your relationship with Tom are dyed in the wool by this point. But now he edits your essays and you bring him coffee when he spends too long in the library. You eat breakfast together. It feels good. It feels natural.

It’s over one breakfast on a nondescript Friday morning that the letter arrives. Tom passes it to you along with a mug of tea and you frown at the unfamiliar handwriting. You scan it quickly and your curiosity quickly turns into disbelieving excitement. “Christella Beaufort wants to meet me.” You whisper, eyes wide, hands shaking. “She says that she’s sorry she missed me at the party and that she’s available to talk the next Hogsmeade weekend. I… Tom, this is… How…?”

“I may have written to her explaining the situation.” He says, entirely casual, as though he hasn’t just made every wish you’ve ever had come true.

He really only has himself to blame when you lean over the Slytherin table, fingers wrapping around his tie and ruin a lot of people’s breakfasts by dragging him into a kiss.

(part 1)

#tom riddle #tom marvolo riddle #tom riddle x oc #tom riddle x y/n #tom riddle x you #tom riddle x reader #tom riddle imagine #tom riddle imagines #tom riddle prompt #minific #tom riddle fanfic #tom riddle fanfiction #tom riddle fic #prompt fill #answered asks #anon #prompt #prompt fic #harry potter #jinxqsu

[autisticcassandracain]

I have many thoughts on the weird phenomena in the DC fandom and the Batfam fandom specifically where probably the majority of people just straight up. haven’t interacted with the source material. and almost all of those thoughts can be summarized as ‘lmao that’s weird and mildly concerning’.

and because I’m annoying I will list them all here right now <3

1. To preface this post, I mean, obviously, comics are inaccessible as all hell, both in the disability kind of way and the ‘you need to understand the concept of hypertime to fully comprehend the DC timeline’ kind of way. Because of this, even if you don’t have a disability that prevents you from reading comics, I don’t think it’s unreasonable to look at the amount of comics you need to read to have even a base understanding of a character and go ‘no thanks <3′ and just enjoy fanart and fanfic in a vacuum. Ultimately, this is fandom, this is supposed to be fun, it doesn’t really matter.

2. That said, it’s VERY weird to me that the majority of this fandom just straight up hasn’t interacted with the source material, and moreover, that it’s considered rude to tell people that they should do so. It’s especially weird considering the amount of fanon-only fans I’ve seen who straight up have a superiority complex over canon. The idea that it’s gatekeeping to tell fans of something to actually interact with canon is just. so weird, and a fundamental misunderstanding of what ‘gatekeeping’ actually entails. 

3. But honestly I’m less interested in discussing the ways in which canon and fanon fans should interact with each other (personally, I think it would be helpful to create separate tags of some kind, but that’d require quite a big overhaul of the current fandom state) than in figuring out how this actually happened in the first place. On the one hand, it’s obvious; long-running superhero comics the way DC writes them have made themselves so thoroughly inaccessible that most people are simply too daunted to even try. Most media has a cohesive beginning and end (or at least, a planned end somewhere). Comics just... don’t.

But I do think it says something that, even among people who are clearly interested in the characters (since they have, you know, entire blogs about them), the effort to get into comics just seems to be too much to even bother. This really doesn’t bode well for the future of DC Comics. Obviously, I am no expert on anything at all ever, but I’d personally be surprised if DC survives beyond the few decades, at least in its current form/without a big overhaul.

4. But on the other hand, I don’t think the confusing state of DC Comics is the only thing to blame here. Fandom has a well-known problem with reducing any character down to archetypes to more easily ship and write fic/make content with. This problem is particularly prominent in fanfic, which, if you read enough of it, you’ll eventually start seeing not just the same tropes and trends, but essentially the same fics over and over again. And not just within the same fandom; everywhere, or every large fandom, at least. 

Fanon Batfam is entirely built on a bunch of those tropes; insecure/depressed sadboy Tim, team mom with optional hidden trauma/emotional problems Dick, bad boy with a heart of gold + sadboy combo Jason, abused sadboy Damian/angry easily-villified-for-fic-reasons monster Damian, good dad Bruce for found family fic and bad dad Bruce for angst fic, etc. This all culminates in a found family dynamic that’s generic and malleable to whatever fic the writer wants to write.

(This isn’t getting into the ship fic, which I avoid like the plague because the vast majority of it is incest, but I’d bet real actual money that the tropes in those fics fall under what is often preferred by the Migratory Slash Fandom.)

By having a decent excuse not to get into canon (the inaccessibility of comics) and a, by now, well-established fanon fandom, many fans feel free to use the batfam fandom as essentially an excuse to write whatever fic with reduced archetypes and tropes they personally feel the itch to write, without having to bother with even consuming a canon. This is compounded by the fact that canon itself is often contradictory and frankly bad, meaning that whatever interpretation of a character you want/need to go for your fic is at least theoretically backed up by canon (for example, you can just as easily cast Bruce as an abusive shithole dad who his kids need to get away from as a loving father figure who cares deeply for his children), which you can always use as a defense if people question your characterization.

5. This focus on fandom trends and tropes over actual creativity or care for the characters is also visible in the way bigotry manifests in this fandom; namely, in literally the exact way you’d expect. The female characters and characters of colour are shuffled to the side, non-existent, vilified, and/or reduced to harmful stereotypes. 

Barbara is probably the one I saw the most often in fanfic, but usually just as ‘Dick’s girlfriend’, and even then, she was often vilified for Dick angst (especially in fics about examining Dick’s trauma from his canon sexual assault; Kori also often gets the short end of the stick in those). After that, probably Stephanie, who fanon fans don’t really seem to know what to do with, so she’s basically just there as comic relief waffle girl, most of the time, though sometimes she can be used to either further Tim angst or further vilify Tim, whatever the fic calls for. Cass has gotten included more in batfam fics as of late, likely in response to critiques of fandom racism for leaving her out, but again, it’s clear people don’t actually know what to do with her. She’s often reduced to a racist stereotype of a quite, stoic therapist for whatever guy du jour needs it. That, or she’s in Hong Kong and just not there. Duke especially gets left in the dust in fandom, usually just being non-existent, but when he’s there, he’s almost always nothing more than the straight man for the actual fun characters to play off of. Talia probably has it the worst, though, and almost universally gets vilified by fanon stans in order to write sadboy Damian.

All of this is extremely predictable behaviour and falls entirely in line with general fandom misogyny and racism; ignoring or vilifying women and characters of colour, or using them as very minor characters at best. The only two characters of colour who aren’t regularly left out of fic are Dick and Damian, who are both also conveniently the two characters most often drawn and written in a whitewashed manner. In addition, there’s a real trend of demonizing Damian in fanon fics where he isn’t written as an abused sadboy, which I’d argue is in no small part due to fandom racism, considering Damian’s behaviour is in no way as bad as Jason’s, who doesn’t get anywhere close to the same demonization and gets woobiefied instead. I also find it convenient that Damian is probably the batboy who receives the most vilification in fic, when he’s the most obviously non-white of the batboys they’re willing to acknowledge.

Fandom often cries for more diversity in canon, only to ignore the diversity already there and focus on the same generic white guys. The batfam fandom is a brilliant example of this.

Which is not to say that fandom racism and misogyny isn’t present in the canon parts of the fandom (and canon itself); it absolutely 100% is. But I’ve found that canon fans are also more likely to like and care about at least one of the characters I’ve listed as ignored/vilified, and are willing to create and consume content for them, whereas fanon fans... aren’t, really. I’ve never seen a fan of fanon Cass the way I’ve seen fans of fanon Dick, for example. Obviously, this could just be by coincidence, or I’ve just surrounded myself with people like that, but it’s been a trend I noticed. Racism and misogyny is present in every part of this fandom and should be addressed as such, but I feel like it manifests the most blatantly in the fanon parts of this fandom. 

(I’d also recommend the articles Migratory Slash Fandom’s Focus and Beige Blank Slates, which expand more on the type of fandom racism I think is especially prominent in the batfam fandom, as well as literally every article in the What Fandom Racism Looks Like series.)

6. All this leads me to conclude that the majority of fanon fans don’t actually like the characters all that much; they’re convenient excuses for them to participate in fandom. Which I also think is, in no small part, a reason why so many of them react so negatively to being told to pick up a comic; they came to this fandom specifically to consume it as a fandom, because they wanted the fandom experience without having to consume a canon. 

This is not a phenomena unique to the batfam fandom (again, see the Migratory Slash Fandom), but it does fascinate me. While fandom is often said to be an experience focusing on transformative art, I think it’s also safe to say that, especially as fandom has become more mainstream, an increasing amount of people are looking to it less as a way to engage with their favourite pieces of media, and more as a type of media in and of itself. I think the reasons for this are similar to the reasons mass media entertainment like the MCU are so popular; you gain a lot of enjoyment out of it with very little risk involved. 

By consuming the same fics of the same characters (or the same archetypes) over and over again, you are rarely at risk of being challenged or even disappointed. It’s often very clear right from the start whether or not a fic will appeal to you, and if it isn’t, it’s easy to just look for another one. It requires less emotional investment than most other types of media, even ‘popcorn media’ like the MCU - or, yes, DC Comics. It’s safe, it’s enjoyable, it’s comforting, like McDonalds, but just like McDonalds, it’s ultimately bland and unsubstantial. 

7, TL;DR. Ultimately, I don’t think it’s like, wrong to enjoy the fanon version of the batfam without wanting to engage with canon, and I certainly don’t think it’s okay to harrass people over it. But I do think it’s in large part based on a desire to interact with fandom rather than other pieces of media because people are scared of being let down by those pieces of media (or worse, just uninterested in actually thinking), which is mildly concerning. 

#long post #my posts #infodumping #btw i say this as someone who also has trouble consuming much more than popcorn media/fanfic due to emotional exhaustion #but it's not a healthy habit and it's something people can and should try to break out of #also obviously this isn't about EVERY fanon fan specifically so if this doesn't apply to you specifically great then move on

[local-starry-catboi]

Right or Wrong Challenge

Introduction

I had stumbled upon this challenge after seeing it pinned at the top of the One Piece Amino featured page back in April 2019. It was the first challenge I entered after actually becoming active. I decided to polish this blog a little (aka match the formatting to Tumblr, hope I don't fuck up-), to post it here as well •^•

Decided to pick the imagine-yourself-as-marine-so-which-justice-do-you-follow-for-reasons question the leaders of this challenge set up. On the one hand because it seemed interested, on the other hand because it looked like it might be one of the easier questions to answer for my 🍞 brain. After typing out everything though, I can say that it's actually tougher than it looked like at the first glance to be honest. Especially not deciding what justice and why..

The challenge question set up was

"If you were a marine, whose justice would you follow and why? Or do you have your own sense of justice? If so, explain."

Definition(s) of Justice

Many people define justice by other things, like how they know it, how they feel about it, if it's important or not, what makes a decision just or unjust.

That leads us to a spot where there are a few points to consider. So first off, it makes sense to start by breaking up the meaning of justice using three methods.

First option:

"Justice [noun], coming from the Latin word 'justitia'; refers to just behaviour or treatment, the quality of being fair and reasonable as well as the administration of the law or authority in maintaining this." - Oxford Dictionary.

Second option:

"Justice, at it's base, means 'to be just, fair'. Most commonly however, the meaning of justice is to punish a criminal that has done something wrong in a suitable manner that fits their crime." - One Piece.

Third option:

"[...] Justice will prevail, you say? But of course it will! Whoever wins this war becomes justice!" - Doflamingo during the Paramount War.

So far:

Firstly, to sum up: In the end, the first two definitions go hand-in-hand with each other. The definitions of justice are in some thing close to each other and in some things they are far apart from each other. On the whole this means that even though they both use different words, are the same in the end of the day.

Secondly, hence the Marine is actually the "good" fraction in One Piece whereas the pirates are the actual antagonists, they have to shoulder and act out their role as eyes and sword of the law, judging over those who were unjust towards the law due to criminal activities.

Thirdly, the way Doffy looks at justice is also interesting though, hence he points at the fact that those with the great power usually decide what justice is. This way the stronger fraction also decides what is right and what is wrong. I wanted to put him into this as well because his viewpoint is interesting, too, even though he's not a Marine.

But now let's get back to the topic, shall we~?

Lastly: Moreover, every single one of the forms of justice has its right and a good reason to exist. Why you ask? Because not every living being thinks the same way like another. Even animals seem to possess another sense of righteousness and justice as humans - in addition, they differ from animal to animal as well. The effect of this is that Kuzan's statement he gave to Jaguar D. Sauro back then, that "The thing called 'justice' changes its shape... Depending on where you stand." is true, too. As a result, every form of justice is true - only depending on from which side you look at it.

Despite this freedom of opinion like with this topic, the Marines' general way of justice can be looked at as some sort of 'ridding the world from everything evil existing there".

Types of Justice

Since there are multiple types of justice given in the world of One Piece, lead by the Admirals, the CP9 and other Marines, I'll explain each of them.

Akainu's Absolute Justice:

His motto regarding the Absolute Justice is the "Thorough Justice". He seems to stick to this doctrine as close as possible, yet seemingly does not to mind going against it on the other side, judging by how he reacts to Coby, deserters, pirates and the likens. If Sakazuki comes up with any issues regarding illegal activities, I believe it's better to rethink these choices and to put in at least a bit of benevolence. It's an efficient option to differenciate well between those who can be taken down without major consequences or remorses and those who can "stay".

Lucci's Dark Justice:

Supposedly the CP0's kitty cat can be compared to Batman - to a certain degree at least. He bases his sense of justice on his own personal philosophy of "Neccessary Evil". Thus, he only destroys those who go against the interests of the World Government to defend them ( = the interests). For this, he himself becomes evil to support his ideals. Besides the fact, that he doesn't seem to care much about it, possibly comes from the WG deciding what justice is for him and the other CP agents. Thus, this results in him having his reasons for choosing this type of justice.

Aokiji's Lazy Justice:

The Lazy Justice (before it was the Burning or Fired Up Justice) is the rather laid-back opposite of the Thorough Justice in my eyes. It underlines his lack of interest and relaxed attitude towards many things as long as he doesn't think about a situation worthy enough for him to intervene. This is part of Moral Justice, thus acting according to it when it's needed. It shows well how he doesn't care about much that happens around him besides the complexity of his character. The Lazy Justice could be a sign to point out that it doesn't always need a ruthless man leading the sword of justice, but can also take a more relaxed but equally capable.

Fujitora's Blind Justice:

Besides the Moral or Virtuous Justice type of motto Isshō follows, he sticks to his own ideals instead of the Marine's Absolute Justice doctrine. He acts according to what he thinks to be morally fine like bringing those to justice who act without moral or anything. All this is underlined by the fact that he took his own eyesight to never see the unjustice of corruption done otherwise. This way Fujitora goes as far as taking responsibilites onto himself which other members of the Marine wouldn't have had to take otherwise if they were in his shoes.

Kizaru's Unclear Justice:

As its name states and how he possess a neutral attitude towards the Absolute Justice, it's somewhat unclear, how to define his type of justice. Except for the fact that it's mercy what he lacks, he doesn't really show a lot of passion or anything to pursue justice most of the time, however. If things restrain him from achieving his goal he only gets slightly annoyed and that's it, unlike Sakazuki for example.

Smokers' Eat Shit Justice:

He follows his own path of justice, unlike the majority of his colleagues do. Out of most of the Marine, he appears to be the most "normal" out of the bunch. Smoker seems to act on some sort of "be nice to me or I'll kill you" codex, like it was shown back during the Alabasta Arc for example. His Eat Shit Justice may be one of the more humane types of justice. After all though you shouldn't get on his bad side then or it surely will be over as soon as it is like with the other types of justice.

Conclusion Time

Now, to the interesting part. Whose justice would I and why?

That's actually a really tough decision. I had to think a lot between three types of justice, yet all of the ones mentioned above have their pros and cons. Eat shit, Lazy and Blind were the ones I couldn't choose between first.

But behold.. In the end I came to my current point: By a high chance I would follow Smoker's ideals of justice - as long as I understood and interpreted it correctly and not completely wrong, of course.

Why I chose his one over the others, you want to know?

The answer is simple. It's partially a thing of good education, I suppose. My landlords (called ✨ parents ✨ by some others) always said I have to be nice to others unless they become rude, there's the point then to just go out of their way. Just a typical thing every little kid hears, one day after another, so nothing special. Over the last few years however (to be exactly back when I came into 5th grade, middle school), I kind of accustomed myself to not always just take diverse comments, rude behaviour and all the likens because not all of the other students of my year were nice. Since then I decided to not take shit from most others who are constantly rude and toxic, especially for no reason. That's the reason why I follow the motto of "Be nice to me and I'm nice to you. Be, constantly, a bitch to me and I'll bitch back so eat shit, you idjit.".

Outroduction

Yee, so that was the blog •3• I surprisingly won with it, although it was the first one I had ever written, I've linked the original post from OPA. Looking back now, it sort of feels like a very lame, plain and boring character analysis and by now, I'd put far more effort into it.

Credits

Treasure Cruise renders on the dividers by KaizokuJotei on DeviantArt, and edited in PicsArt.

#anime #one piece #analysis #justice #challenge #entry #right or wrong #smoker #akainu #sakazuki #kuzan #aokiji #kizaru #borsalino #fujitora #issho #lucci #rob lucci #marine #cp9 #cp0 #onepiece cp9 #onepiece cp0 #one piece marines #local starry catboy #blog post

[beebrainedstudios]

Hello! Could you tell me more about how you interpret/headcanon the sentient magic in Darker shades of magic? I read some of yours posts and I'm fascinated by the concept

Hi, and thank you! I'm glad you've found my theories interesting! This may be a little bit long and rambling, as I’m still nailing out just how I interpret the magic in this series. Some of this I came up with on the spot and some of it’s torn from previous posts, so if I later change things or contradict myself, that’s why. Enjoy!

So, magic is canonically implied to have some sort of will in the series. As Kell says it’s alive, even if it isn’t alive in quite the same way that people are, and it seems to express some sort of comprehension in the way that it has the potential to resist, act out, or flee (as is the case in White London). It seems to have the capacity to think and possess an agenda too, such as when Kell was able to perform spells he technically shouldn’t have (As Travars-ing while under the influence of a royal sword); the magic “let him in,” with the implication being it was because he asked it instead of commanding it. Now, I don’t think it’s sentient in the same way that Osaron is- it’s more like a force made of the threads of power, acting naturally, but with enough understanding to show favor or distaste. It’s not organic, it doesn’t think organically, but it can perceive and respond.

However, this kind of magic isn’t the only kind. I like to think that magic in ADSOM occurs in different types. First, there’s natural magic, the kind discussed above that is present everywhere and in everything. This kind of magic is sort of like a blanket that covers each world. Before the Split, it was able to move between each world, but regardless of where it’s from, magic develops a different “personality” depending on its relationship with the local people. Natural magic has a symbiotic relationship with humans that is supposed to be mutualistic- the magic gets used (which is its primary motivation) and people reap the benefits. In a stable world where this is happening, magic moves swiftly and readily interacts with people. However, in worlds where this relationship is disrupted (such as in Grey where it isn’t used) or where magic is abused (such as in White where magic is needed so much that they bind it), it has a tendency to leave or wither. In short, it won’t stay in a hostile or poor environment.

All people also have their own specific magic, which is really just their personal store of power that’s used whenever they cast spells and whatnot. This varies tremendously based on age, skill, luck, and other factors, but every person has access to different elements or spell types (Runes vs enchanting objects, for example). The scent also varies with each person, but only those who are well equipped in tracking magic or Antari are usually able to distinguish it.

Then there’s oshoc- AKA Osaron and Vitari. There’s no specific definition for them, but I’m going to define them as a separate chunk of magic that originated from a source and is capable of learning; basically a magic AI. Now, the books are vague on Osaron’s origins; magic appeared in Black London one day, but refused to interact with people until it grew lonely and bored enough to seek them out, and this is when Osaron first appears. Now, I’m going to take it a step further and say this was when Osaron was actually born; natural magic had already appeared, but a separate piece of it broke off due to a new desire and ceased being everywhere and in everything so it could be its own contained entity. So, Osaron can act independently of natural magic and actually works by manipulating the threads of power; he’s a catalyst that can manipulate the “equations” of spells, starting them or stopping them or changing them around. However, he still has the same innate desire to interact and change that natural magic has. He also made the Vitari stone, which is where Vitari comes from- it later developed a consciousness that is much less developed than Osaron (it is actively learning during ADSOM) but still focused on spreading and being used. As a general rule of thumb, an oshoc is able to use any magic no matter what kind it is- there’s not so much a symbiotic relationship there as a system they can access at any time. For humans, it’s a relationship; for oshoc, it’s a bunch of threads to be moved, as they don’t differentiate between natural magic or themselves and natural magic doesn’t either. All oshoc also rely on other sources of power to “jump-start” their own, typically in the form of the worlds' magic or humans.

Spells and enchanted objects are not magic- they are manipulations of magic that draw on its power, essentially chemical equations in magical chemistry, if that makes sense. So no will, no agenda, nothing- they’re just actions, but they can affect natural magic and oshoc. Normal spells are generally viewed positively by natural magic as a sign of use, but things like binding runes and the collar are seen as threats. Most spells are allowed or even aided by magic- meaning they are used easily- but anyone with a strong enough will or power will be able to use magic regardless of whether or not magic “likes” it (such as Athos with Vitari).

Finally, there’s Antari. Being a mixture of man and magic, natural magic has an innate connection with them that usually amounts to mutual affection for both parties. This bond is always present even when passive, and allows Antari to sense magic much more easily than normal humans; it is also what is responsible for the instinctual urge to travel and need to use their magic often. Antari feel a pull towards strong magic that can be compared to warmth in a cold room. The bond is stronger when an Antari likes their magic and tries to connect with it- this is why Kell (and Rowan) are typically favored by magic and allowed to get away with impossible spells, while characters like Lila or Holland have to put a little more work into it. There are a few drawbacks to this connection though, most notably a weakness in magic-poor areas and a vulnerability to oshoc, which directly prey on this connection in order to possess them. Due to the strength of this connection, humans placing large scale attacks on Antari can draw magic's ire, leading to storms and disasters as magic wields the elements to make a point. This generally only occurs when extremely powerful Antari are killed or when they die in large numbers though. On a smaller scale, it is common for flowers to grow in any earth that Antari blood touches, and an Antari's sour mood can summon rain or wind.

A few other random thoughts on the subject:

The reason Osaron and Vitari can possess Antari while Astrid can’t is due to their access to magic’s threads- oshoc can hijack the Antari-magic connection to more easily enter a mind than a human would be able to.

Examples of natural magic’s “favor;” Kell As Travars-ing while stabbed by a royal-half sword and Holland instinctually learning Antari spells with no prior knowledge of them.

It’s magic itself that Holland hears calling him when he dies.

The black plague is not a kind of magic, it’s a virus-like thing that overtakes and corrupts magic until it excites itself into nothing. Osaron is not solely capable of making it and does not consciously do so. The plague simply appears when magic is too strong and being manipulated too much; Osaron tends to cause it due to his power levels and overindulgence in using magic, but anybody powerful and overly-eccentric enough could theoretically cause it too. Oshoc however are immune.

Oshoc have access to the threads of power and can instinctively use them, but they must naturally learn about everything else, which is why neither Vitari nor Osaron had any idea what was going on when they first went to Red London. This is also why they lack many human social traits and are so easily confused by human behavior. That being said, there are some spells they can use for shortcuts, such as automatically translating things (Osaron does it in ACOL).

Osaron also feels an innate appreciation for Antari like magic does, but his consciousness also allows him to be annoyed with him; while he’d like to befriend them all, he doesn’t mind getting rid of them if they aren’t willing to do the same.

Neither natural magic nor oshoc really have any moral drive. The latter could theoretically be taught morals, but they don't look at things the same way people do, so there's less internal pressure to behave than there is for them to cast spells. Like everything else, it would be a learning curve.

And that's all I've got for now! I realize I may have strayed slightly outside the topic of the sentient magic specifically; my apologies! I guess I just got excited writing about everything and how the magic systems connect. Enjoy!

#this ended up way bigger than intended #oops #adsom #a darker shade of magic #shades of magic #adsom theory #adsom headcanons #bee rambles #ask bee #bee asks

[queenlua]

hey, i started following you recently and ur bio says ur a hacker? any tips on where to start? hacking seems like a v cool/fun way to learn more abt coding and cybersecurity/infrastructure and i'd like to explore it but there's so much on the internet and like, i'm not trying to get into anything illegal. thanks!

huh, an interesting question, ty!

i can give more tailored advice if you hit me up on chat with more specifics on your background/interests.

given what you've written here, though, i'll just assume you don't have any immediate professional aspirations (e.g. you just want to learn some things, and you aren't necessarily trying to get A Cyber Security Job TM within the next three months or w/e), and that you don't know much about any specific programming/computering domain yet.

(stuff under cut because long)

first i'd probably just try to pick some interesting problem that you think you can solve with tech. this doesn't need to be a "hacking" project at first; i was just messing around with computers for ages before i did anything involving security/exploitation.

if you don't already know how to program, you should ideally pick a problem you can solve via programming. for instance: i learned a lot back in the 2000s, when play-by-post forum RPGs were in vogue.  see, i'd already been messing around, building my own personal sites, first just with HTML & CSS, and later on with Javascript and PHP.   and i knew the forum software everyone used (InvisionPowerBoard) was written in PHP.  so when one of the admins at my RPG complained that they'd like the ability to set multiple profile pictures, i was like, "hey i'm good at programming, want me to create a mod to do that," and then i just... did. so then they asked me to program more features, and i got all the sexy nerd cred for being Forum Mod Queen, and it was a good time, i learned a lot.

(i also got to be the person who was frantically IMed at 2am because wtf the forum is down and there's an inscrutable error, what do??? basically sysadmining! also, much less sexy! still, i learned a lot!)

the key thing is that it's gotta be a problem that's interesting to you: as much as i love making dorky sites in PHP, half the fun was seeing other people using my stuff, and i think the era of forum-based RPGs has passed. but maybe you can apply some programming talents to something that you are interested in—maybe you want to make a silly Chrome extension to make people laugh, a la Cloud to Butt, or maybe you'd like to make a program that converts pixel art into cross-stitching patterns, maybe you want to just make a cool adventure game on those annoying graphing calculators they make you use in class, or make a script for some online game you play, or make something silly with Arduino (i once made a trash can that rolled toward me when i clapped my hands; it was fun, and way easier than you'd think!), whatever.

i know a lot of hacker-types who got their start doing ROM hacking for video games—replacing the character art or animations or whatever in old NES games. that's probably more relevant than the PHP websites, at least, and is probably a solid place to get started; in my experience those communities tend to be reasonably friendly to questions. pick a small thing you want to do & ask how to do it.

also, a somewhat unconventional path, but—once i knew how to program a bit of Python, i started doing goofy junk, like, "hey can i implemented NamedTuple from scratch,” which tends to lead to Python metaprogramming, which leads to surprising shit like "oh, stack frames are literally just Python objects and you can manually edit them in the interpreter to do deliberately horrendous/silly things, my god this language allows too much reflection and i'm having too much fun"... since Python is a lot of folks' first language these days, i thought i'd point that out, since i think this is a pretty accessible start to thinking about How Programs Actually Work under the hood. allison kaptur has some specific recommendations on how to poke around, if you wanna go that route.

it's reasonably likely you'll end up doing something "hackery" in the natural course of just working on stuff. for instance, while i was working on the IPB forum software mods, i became distressed to learn that everyone was using an INSECURE version of the software! no one was patching their shit!! i yelled at the admins about it, and they were like "well we haven't been hacked yet so it's not a problem," so i uh, decided to demonstrate a proof of concept? i downloaded some sketchy perl script, kicked it until it worked, logged in as the admins, and shitposted a bit before i logged out, y'know, to prove my point.

(they responded by banning me for two weeks, and did not patch their software. which, y'know, rip to them; they got hacked by an unrelated Turkish group two months later, and those dudes just straight-up deleted the whole website. i was a merciful god by comparison!)

anyway, even though downloading a perl script and just pointing it at a website isn't really "hacking" (it's the literal definition of script kiddie, heh)—the point is i was just experimenting a lot and trying a lot of stuff, which meant i was getting comfortable with thinking of software as not just some immutable relic, but something you can touch and prod in unexpected ways.

this dovetails into the next thing, which is like, just learn a lot of stuff. a boring conventional computer science degree will teach you a lot (provided you take it seriously and actually try to learn shit); alternatively, just taking the same classes as a boring conventional computer science degree, via edX or whatever free online thingy, will also teach you a lot. ("contributing to open source" also teaches you a lot but... hngh... is a whole can of worms; send a follow-up ask if you want that rant.)

here's where i should note that "hacking" is an impossibly broad category: the kind of person who knows how to fuck with website authentication tokens is very different than someone who writes a fuzzer, who is often quite different than someone who looks at the bug a fuzzer produces and actually writes a program that can exploit that bug... so what you focus on depends on what you're interested in. i imagine classes with names like "compilers," "operating systems," and "networking" will teach you a lot. but, like, idk, all knowledge is god-breathed and good for teaching. hell, i hear some universities these days have actual computer security classes? that's probably a good thing to look at, just to get a sense of what's out there, if you already know how to program.

also be comfortable with not knowing everything, but also, learn as you go. the bulk of my security knowledge came when i got kinda airdropped into a work team that basically hired me entirely on "potential" (lmao), and uh, prior to joining i only had the faintest idea what a hypervisor was? or the whole protection ring concept? or ioctls or sandboxing or threat models or, fuck, anything? i mostly just pestered people with like 800 questions and slowly built up a knowledge base, and remember being surprised & delighted when i went to a security conference a year later and could follow most of the talks, and when i wound up at a bar with a guy on the xbox security team and we compared our security models a bunch, and so on.  there wasn't a magic moment when i "got it", i was just like, "okay huh this dude says he found a ring-0 exploit... what does that mean... okay i think i got that... why is that a big deal though... better ask somebody.." (also: reading an occasional dead tree book is a good idea. i owe my firstborn to Robert Love's Linux Kernel Development, as outdated as it is, and also O'Reilly's kookaburra book gave me a great overview of web programming back in the day, etc.  you can learn a lot by just clicking around random blogs, but you’ll often end up with a lot of random little facts and no good mental scaffolding for holding it together; often, a decent book will give you that scaffolding.)

(also, it's pretty useful if you can find a knowledgable someone to pepper with random questions as you go. finding someone who will actively mentor you is tricky, but most working computery folks are happy to tell you things like "what you're doing is actually impossible, here's why," or "here's a tutorial someone told me was good for learning how to write a linux kernel module," or "here's my vague understanding of this concept you know nothing about," or "here's how you automate something to click on a link on a webpage," which tends to be handier than just google on its own.)

if you're reading this and you're like "ok cool but where's the part where i'm handed a computer and i gotta break in while going all hacker typer”—that's not the bulk of the work, alas! like, for sure, we do have fun pranking each other by trying dumb ways of stealing each other's passwords or whatever (once i stuck a keylogger in a dude's keyboard, fun times). but a lot of my security jobs have involved stuff like, "stare at this disassembly a long fuckin' time to figure out how the program pointer got all fucked up," or, "write a fuzzer that feeds a lot of randomized input to some C++ program, watch the program crash because C++ is a horrible language for writing software, go fix all the bugs," or "think Really Hard TM about all the settings and doohickeys this OS/GPU/whatever has, think about all the awful things someone could do with it, threat model and sandbox accordingly." occasionally i have done cool proof-of-concept hacks but honestly writing exploits can kinda be tedious, lol, so like, i'm only doing that if it's the only way i can get people to believe that Yes This Is Actually A Problem, Fix Your Code

"lua that's cool and all but i wanted, like, actual links and recommendations and stuff" okay, fair. here's some ideas:

microcorruption: very fun embedded security CTF; teaches you everything you need to know as you're doing it.

cryptopals crypto challenges: very fun little programming exercises that teach you a lot of fundamental cryptography concepts as you're going along! you can do these even as a bit of a n00b; i did them in Python for the lulz

the binary bomb lab is hilariously copied by, like, so many CS programs, lol, but for good reason. it's accessible and fun and is the first time most people get to feel like a real hacker! (requires you know a bit of C beforehand)

ctftime is a good way to see when new CTFs ("capture the flag"s; security-focused competitions) are coming up. or, sometimes CTFs post their source code, so you can continue trying them after the CTF is over. i liked Stripe's CTFs when they were going, because they focused on "web stuff", and "web stuff" was all i really knew at the time. if you're more interested in staring at disassembly, there's CTFs focused on that sort of thing too.

azeria has good ARM assembly & exploitation tutorials

also, like, lots of good talks out there; just watching defcon/cansecwest/etc talks until something piques your interest is very fun. i'd die on a battlefield for any of Christopher Domas's talks, but he assumes a lot of specific x86/OS knowledge, lol, so maybe don’t start with that. oh, Julia Evans's blog is honestly probably pretty good for just learning a lot of stuff and really beginner-friendly?

oh and wrt legality... idk, i haven't addressed it here since it hasn't come up in my own work much, tbh. if you're just getting started you're kind of unlikely to Break The Law without, y'know, realizing maybe you're doing something a bit gray-area? and you can cross that bridge when you come to it? Real Hacking TM is way more of a pain-in-the-ass than doing CTFs and such, and you'll learn way more with the latter, so who cares lol just do the fun thing

[solastia]

Call Of The Sea

Pairing: Jungkook X Hoseok

A/N: So, I went a little crazy. Instead of a tiny drabble this became an almost 4k work. *shrug* As for the smut itself, it’s oviposition (meaning eggs for those that don’t know), so there’s a bit of breeding/impreg kink as well as implied mpreg. I spent way too much time thinking about the mechanics of breeding a human male with a male merman and it shows. Anyway, enjoy!

****

There were a million excuses he’d given his roommates about why he felt the need to visit the beach so often. Most of them bullshit. 

He felt more inspired to draw there - which that one was slightly true. 

It cures his super frequent migraines - he wasn’t sure he’d ever had one his whole life. 

He was interested in marine biology - but not for reasons they might think. 

He could never actually tell them the truth: that he spent all of his free time in a beachside cave in Busan because his boyfriend of seven months was a merman. 

For one that would sound insane, and he knew that if he ever told Yoongi he’d probably storm down here to save Jungkook from someone that was obviously a scammer. And Seokjin was probably related to someone in the military and would have the merman become a science experiment in two seconds flat. 

No, he couldn’t tell them. At least not yet. 

So he simply ignored his guilty conscience and let his plastic bag swing as he strolled down to the beach like he didn’t have a care in the world. 

He pulled his hoodie tight around his ears to ward off the cold. It was getting to be late in the winter season and the trips to the beach were practically hazardous for his health at this point - good thing his boyfriend's smile was as bright as the sun. 

Fuck, that was so cheesy. What the hell was wrong with him? 

Anyway, despite what the temperature read, he still wasn't as cold as he should be. Actually, he was almost toasty and he felt like he was just bundling up out of habit rather than need. His temperature had been strange for a few weeks. 

He shook his head and turned onto the path that led to his secret cave. Well, not that secret. Sometimes older kids came out here to party, but not often and definitely not in the middle of winter. 

Once he reached his cave, he pouted silently over it being empty. He must still be out swimming. Maybe with the water being such a freezing temperature, it slowed him down.  

He sighs forlornly, hoping he won’t have to wait too much longer. He lets both of his bags drop to the sandy floor and unzips the pack back, pulling out the two blankets he’d decided to bring. One for sitting, and one big fluffy down blanket so he wouldn’t get pneumonia. 

He snorts to himself as he gets comfortable and observes the water lapping close to the cave entrance. It’s not likely he’d even get pneumonia without the blanket, though. Beyond his strange fluctuating body heat, he’s been putting on so much weight recently it was ridiculous, like a bear getting ready to hibernate. 

Just this morning he’d tried to wear his sexiest pair of jeans for his boyfriend, only to find that his hips had widened so much he couldn’t pull them up. He’d even had to double up shirts and throw a hoodie over it because his pecs were basically tits now. They were so swollen and sensitive, he didn’t know what was going on. 

And don’t even get him started on everything in the plastic bag. He sighed and brought it closer to him as the urge to protect his bounty overcame him. The same overwhelming urge that had caused him to buy all the food in the first place. He sometimes brought his boyfriend little treats here or there because he got so excited, but this had been some primal urge to shower the merman in foodstuffs. 

He finally heard the sound he’d been waiting for - the nearby shriek of a waterproof whistle. He grinned excitedly and pulled the whistle he wears around his neck up to his lips and blew. It was a signal that alerted his merman that it was safe to show himself. 

“Jungkookie!” 

Jungkook grins as the graceful form of his boyfriend appears at the edge of the cave. He beams up at Jungkook from the shallow waters, his silky long black hair a cloud around him and his tail an iridescent blend of oranges and yellows. He’s so bright in the winter gloom that Jungkook’s spirits are instantly lifted. 

“Hoseok! I missed you!” 

“It’s only been two days, silly human,” but despite his words, he looks pleased and bashful by Jungkook’s unashamed neediness. A neediness that never seemed to go away, not since the moment he’d met the merman in this very spot. 

“Whatever,” Jungkook pouts, pulling his blankets up to his chin to hide his blush. “I’ll just keep the things I brought you then since you don’t care.”

“What?! Gimme!” 

The merman smiles sunnily, his lips shaped like a heart. Jungkook melts and relents, peeling the blankets off of himself and striding closer to the edge with his bag. He crouches and ruffles in the contents as Hoseok eagerly leans over to peek inside. 

“Let’s see, lots of things you said you liked before. Cherry tomatoes, tangerines, fish sausages...a bunch of stuff,” Jungkook shrugs, blushing as he realizes yet again that he may have gone a little overboard judging by the bulging contents of the bag. 

Hoseok looks over the bounty with awe, a gleam in his eye that Jungkook wasn’t sure he’d ever seen before. 

“My mate has provided for me during the winter months,” he says softly, rummaging through the bag like it was filled with gems. 

“That’s a good thing?” Jungkook asks, surprised by Hoseok’s strange response. He’d known the merman would be excited because he liked human food, but he’d been expecting screaming and huge smiles not...whatever this was. And he’d even used the ‘M’ word again - just like he had the last time Jungkook had let the other rut all over him, leaving him with the bite mark that itches on his thigh. 

Instead of answering, Hoseok slowly looks up at him with an intense gaze. His jaw is clenched like he’s deep in thought and then finally he nods - before turning away and diving under the water. 

“What? Hoseok, where are you going?” 

He fucked up somehow. Did he offend the merman? He’s brought him treats before. What did he do wrong?

Nearly ten minutes later Jungkook is close to leaving. The cold is finally starting to annoy him and Hoseok hasn’t come back. He wasn’t sure if he was ever going to. 

He sighs and stands up, deciding to leave the bag where it was. Hoseok could come back for it if he wanted to. Jungkook turns and grabs his blankets, intending to throw them into his backpack when a sudden metallic thump startles him. He looks towards the source, his eyes growing impossibly wide as he takes in the sight. 

Hoseok’s rainbow-hued bag he’d made from discarded netting was familiar to him. The awe-inspiring pile of what can only be termed ‘Treasure’ was spilling onto the rocky ground was something new. Precious gems, ancient coins, golden bangles and crowns, all touched by the sea but still glittering and obviously valuable. 

“Hoseok, what’s all this?” 

“Is this enough?” Hoseok’s voice was intense as he watched Jungkook inspect the goods, his eyes alight with some emotion that he couldn’t interpret. 

“For what?” 

“To provide for you and our young.” 

Jungkook whirled around and gaped at the merman in shock. “Our what now?” 

Hoseok nods briskly like it was just a fact. “Our young. It’s mating season and you accepted my bite. Then you provided me with food to keep my strength up in the winter and able to breed you. By spring, we’ll have our first young!” 

Jungkook drops to the cold ground in shock, staring at Hoseok. 

“Babe, I hate to tell you this, but in the human world a man cannot get pregnant.” 

“Haven’t you noticed the changes to your body since you accepted my bite? Your body widening to better hold my eggs? Your chest filling out so you can nourish our young?” 

“I’m...I...what the fuck?” Jungkook grabs at said chest, feeling their newly acquired plumpness. “Is this permanent? Can I make it stop?” 

Hoseok drooped, his excitement falling from him like a cloak and his eyes radiating hurt. “Yes. You’ll go back to normal after the mating season, whether I breed you or not. Do you...not want me to?” 

Jungkook thought for a moment, going over the past events between the two of them. He supposed he should have known something was up. Hoseok had been getting more...enthusiastic about touching him lately. He’d chalked it up to them getting closer and Hoseok becoming less shy about affection. He’d just assumed that sex wasn’t on the table because of their different anatomy, although Hoseok certainly loved making out and getting Jungkook off. During their last heavy petting session, Hoseok had given him a very intense blowjob that had ended with him biting into the meaty part of Jungkook’s thigh. 

He was definitely crazy about the merman and based on what Hoseok was telling him, he’d basically done everything to make him think that he was down for being his real mate in every way. 

“It’s not that I don’t want to,” Jungkook begins carefully. “But I didn’t know that’s what we were leading to. I didn’t know about the food or the bite.” 

Hoseok’s eyes widen and he clutches a hand to his chest. “I did bad! I forgot you wouldn’t know...I...I’m sorry. I just...it’s instinct and I’ve never found a mate before.” 

“It’s okay. Umm…” Jungkook licks his lips nervously and asks shyly, “What all would this entail?” 

“Entail? Oh...you mean how would I breed you?” 

“Uh, yeah. And like, how would it come out. And what would happen...after.” 

Hoseok searches Jungkook’s face, his smile slowly growing as he takes in the shy interest in Jungkook’s eyes. 

“Well, first I would make out, as you call it. I like doing that a lot. No one touches lips down there,” Hoseok swims a little closer to the cave edge when Jungkook finally smiles a little. “Then I’ll pump you full of my eggs.” 

“EGGS?! I’ll have to lay eggs? Like a chicken?” Jungkook exclaims, his hands flying to his ass like he could protect it. 

Hoseok chuckles. “No, silly human. My eggs will nestle in your womb and absorb your DNA until spring. Since you’re a human, only one or two will be born and the rest of the eggs will be absorbed as nutrients for you and our young. If you were a merman as well, you could have easily given birth to ten or more. My sister had thirty.” 

“Okay, but how are they going to come out?” 

“You’re not done growing,” Hoseok smirked. “The bite is still working on you and helping your body evolve to handle our mating. If you decide to deny our bond, you will completely go back to the way you were before my bite. If you let me breed you, most of the outer changes will go back to normal until next season, but your new internal parts will stay to keep you compatible for the next season. You are growing a womb and a birthing slit.” 

“Jesus,” Jungkook stares at the merman in surprise and trepidation. “You must like me a whole lot to want babies and stuff.” 

“I do,” Hoseok nodded vigorously. “Bunches and bunches. I’ve never participated in the mating season before. My family called me odd because I was “picky” but now I’m happy I was. My mate is the human Jungkook.” 

“How...uh...how will you get the eggs in me?” 

Jungkook blushes when Hoseok pierces him with an assessing gaze. He was surprised with himself that the thought of walking around with Hoseok’s eggs - while still fucking weird - also got him rock-hard. Like he could keep a piece of the beautiful man with him on land, and one that he could feel inside of him. 

“I have an organ like yours, it just looks a bit different. It’s kept inside until I’m ready.” 

“And...are you?”

“Ready?” Hoseok quirks an eyebrow, smirking slightly. “I’m always ready with you, but do you want this?” 

Jungkook swallows nervously, but the image of finally being fucked by this beautiful person was enough to get him wanting to scream “Yes.” 

Not to mention, the more he thought about it, the more the idea of having a child - no matter how strangely they were made - that was a little bit of him and Hoseok....he found the idea appealing. 

“Okay. Let’s do it.” 

Hoseok’s heart-shaped smile was as bright as the sun. “Okay! Lose all those silly clothes. My bite should be keeping you warm, especially once you get in the water.” 

Jungkook pauses with his shirt half over his head. “I’m going to be in the water? In the middle of winter?” 

Hoseok shrugs, “For a little bit.” 

Jungkook eyes him dubiously. “Uh-huh.” 

Still, he strips, throwing his clothes away from the water as far as he could. He was already embarrassingly hard, his cock barely shaking as he walked towards the merman. 

“Lay down and make out!” Hoseok declared, and Jungkook did so with a chuckle. The merman absolutely loved kissing. He’d been wide-eyed with wonder the first time Jungkook had impulsively pecked his lips, then demanded more almost immediately. One time Hoseok had even challenged himself to kiss every inch of Jungkook - every inch. 

Jungkook laid on his blanket close to the water’s edge and Hoseok pulled himself up to hover over the human. He quietly studied his face, a tiny fond smile gracing his lips. 

“Hi there,” Jungkook giggled. Hoseok grinned and lowered his face more. 

“Hello,” he responded quietly, then pressed his lips to Jungkook’s. 

The human moaned into the soft kiss, loving the slight tang of the sea and chilled skin against his. After Hoseok had received his fill of lips he moved lower, peppering tiny kisses until he reached Jungkook’s neck. 

He growled lightly into the skin, nipping at it playfully. “Hoseok, come on.” 

“Yeah? You need it, precious? Need to be bred?” 

Jungkook’s breath hitched, not expecting the low husky tone of Hoseok’s voice. He growled into Jungkook’s neck, the words sounding like filth dipped in honeyed caramel.

“Want it. Breed me,” he begged in a hushed voice, still battling his shyness. 

“Anything you want, precious. My precious mate,” Hoseok answered, his voice tinged with awe as he stroked his hand all over Jungkook’s soft skin. 

He slid away until he was once away fully in the water and held out a hand. “Come join me in here, Jungkook. You’ll be fine.” 

“Really?” Jungkook asked, eyeing the water with doubt. It was the middle of winter and the water had to be cold enough to kill someone. 

“My bite protects you. Come here.” 

Jungkook scoots to the edge and grabs Hoseok’s hand, letting the merman help him into the water. He’d been expecting a shock, but it merely felt lukewarm to him. Comfortable enough, he supposed. Hoseok held him close then turned him towards the rocky edge of the cave. 

“Grab onto the ledge,” Hoseok whispered teasingly into his ear. 

Jungkook did as he was told, grasping onto the ledge for dear life as Hoseok’s hands traveled down to grab him by the hips. 

“Umm, I’m not prepared. We need stuff.”

Hoseok cocks his head curiously, “Stuff?” 

“Like, slippery stuff. So, uh, it won’t hurt.” 

“OH! No, that happens naturally. I have everything you need. Do humans need extra fluids? How strange.” 

Jungkook chuckles, “Yeah, humans are the weird ones here.” 

“Hey,” Hoseok playfully frowns. “I’ll leave you to drown.” 

“Sorry, sorry. As you were.” 

Hoseok made a ‘hrumph’ sound and tapped Jungkook’s ass lightly. He can feel something floating underneath him and he sneaks a peek. It’s long and wide, a fleshy pink with bumps and ridges covering it in a strange pattern. He glances behind him to stare at Hoseok’s tail, noticing the open slit in the middle of it where the pink...oh fuck that’s his dick! It was at least ten inches long, maybe more, and as wide as Jungkook's arm. 

“That...that’s supposed to fit inside of me?” Jungkook asks breathlessly, staring in wonder at the monster cock growing out of the merman. 

“Mmm, I have to get really deep to protect our eggs,” Hoseok mumbled, pressing a reassuring kiss to the back of Jungkook’s neck. 

Jungkook turns his head and stares at the cave ledge, waiting for the first press. He nearly jumps when the bulbous head touches his rim, forcing himself to breathe as Hoseok slowly forces the head inside. 

The merman sighs happily and rubs his chin into Jungkook’s hair. “You feel so nice inside,” he hums as he holds still, letting the human’s walls work to contain him. 

After a couple seconds Jungkook feels something shooting inside of him. He turns back to glare at Hoseok incredulously. “Already?” 

The merman chuckles. “No, precious. It’s just secretions to help you handle me. It’s a while yet until I fill you properly.” 

“Oh,” Jungkook gulps. 

Hoseok moves his hips again, forcing more and more of his monster cock into Jungkook with every pump. Whatever he’d filled Jungkook with made the slide painless and he felt barely any discomfort. 

His cock continued further and further, until it grazed his prostate and went further still. He wasn’t even sure that a dick was supposed to reach that high without hurting him, but he couldn’t complain too much when the outline of Hoseok’s cock bulging from his stomach made his own twitch with need. 

“Hold on, Jungkookie,” Hoseok rasps, before slamming to the hilt. He only had a second to grip the ledge with all his might before Hoseok started pounding with such raw power that he wanted to scream and they’d only just started. 

He’d never felt so full in his life and the way that Hoseok was hammering into him felt like he was rebuilding his body to fit only him. Jungkook could only whine and sob as his senses were overwhelmed. 

“Precious?” Hoseok grunted, “Are you close, sweet thing?” 

He was. He was so embarrassingly close but he didn’t want to be. Mere minutes of the merman slamming into him like his life depended on it and he was ready to burst. 

“Don’t stop, please don’t stop,” Jungkook begs with a sob. “Don’t ever fucking stop!” 

Hoseok chuckles lowly. “Never? You want me to keep filling you up forever and ever? My sweet precious mate. So perfect,” he growls. “I want to stay inside you forever too. Fill you to the brim with my eggs until your belly is round.” 

Jungkook whimpers as Hoseok’s teeth graze his neck and he feels his cock growing impossibly wider. 

“Bigger?” he moans, “Why? I can’t…” 

“You can, precious. Your body is mine. I have to keep you in place so I can fill you up.” 

Hoseok’s dick stretches him more than he’d ever thought possible. The bumps and ridges on it rubbing the inside of his walls until he thought he would go crazy. 

“Hoseok, I’m gonna…” 

“Yeah? Release for me, precious.” 

And Jungkook cums with a loud cry, his hips bucking into nothing as he shoots into the sea. 

“Good job. Here they come now, sweetness. I’m going to breed my mate.” 

Hoseok groans huskily as he grinds against Jungkook’s ass like he was desperately trying to get further inside but couldn’t. He didn’t feel anything different at first, besides the massive river of cum that painted his insides. Then...then he felt something rippling along Hoseok’s cock, making the already large organ wider still. 

“Yes, yesss…” Hoseok panted into his ear as he shallowly bucked, seeming like the act of releasing his eggs made him feel even better than an orgasm did. 

Finally Jungkook felt the first foreign object enter his body and travel up, up, and up. It hadn’t felt that large, perhaps the size of a lemon, and round. However, with the release of the first egg it seemed the others weren’t far behind. 

One more traveled from Hoseok’s cock into him, then another, and another, until he’d lost count. He was unable to do more than rest his forehead against the cool stone floor and try not to be overwhelmed as the little eggs stroked his insides and traveled to their new home in his womb. And he knew it was there because he could feel them settle inside, bulging his tummy and pressing down on his pelvis. 

Hoseok hadn’t been able to stop groaning and bucking as each egg was released, seeming to be in an endless state of euphoria. 

Jungkook realized that somewhere along the line he’d gotten hard again, the feeling of the eggs jostling his sensitive body too much to handle. It wouldn’t take much to cum again. 

Hoseok sighed and finally stopped his grinding, leaning his head onto Jungkook’s shoulder to rest. 

“So good, precious Jungkook. I’ve never felt such bliss in all my days.” 

Jungkook wanted to respond, but he was trying to reach down and tug himself to completion without slipping into the ocean. Hoseok notices and chuckles. 

“Again, my sweet? You like being filled that much?” 

Jungkook whimpers and nods, letting Hoseok bat his hand away to replace it with his own. 

It only takes a few tugs of those long, nimble fingers before he shouts and cums, his cock slightly pained from sensitivity. 

“There we go. And out of the water with you.” 

Hoseok slides out of him and his cock is once again sheathed into his tail slit. He helps to heave the human onto the ledge and lets him catch his breath as the merman strokes Jungkook’s bulging stomach. 

“So big and full. How do they feel?” 

“Um, nice. I like it. I feel...warm and safe.” 

Hoseok glances up in surprise, “Yeah? You like it a lot?” 

Jungkook nods vigorously. “I can’t wait to meet them. What are we going to do when they’re born?” 

Hoseok stares thoughtfully at his hand on the human’s stomach. “I suppose if they have split fins like you they’ll live on land. If they are mer then they’d have to stay with me. At least until I find a way to be with you.” 

Jungkook’s eyes widened in surprise. “With me? You want to be on land?” 

Hoseok shrugs shyly. “I don’t have much to hold me here, and I’ve always wanted to meet your friends. You speak so highly of them.” 

“Yeah,” he muses, only to freeze two seconds later. “Oh fuck, you knocked me up. Yoongi and Seokjin are going to kill you!” 

“What?” Hoseok asks in alarm. 

“Don’t worry. I think we can get Namjoon on our side, but be prepared for a scolding.” 

“You mean, you want me to join you on land?” 

“Yeah,” Jungkook grins happily. “You’re my family too, and we’re going to have...young. We’ll figure it out.” 

“Yes. Yes, we will.” Hoseok settles and sighs, laying his head onto his mate’s belly. 

#bts #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #bts smut #kinktober #merman!au #merman!hoseok #solastia

[twentiethcenturymoviesandtv]

The Goonies: The Characters

No matter how good a story is, how great the cinematography, or how subversive the genre-usage, a movie cannot stand without use of characters.

Characters are perhaps the most vital element of any story ever told.  An interesting plot helps a movie greatly, but without a use of compelling characters, it falls flat on an audience who doesn’t care about the well-being of the people pushing the story forward.  Viewers need flawed, interesting people, moving the story and trying to overcome conflict, in order for a movie to feel satisfying.

Or, they can have a bunch of bickering children stumbling and screaming their way through caves, led by Head Goonie: Michael “Mikey” Walsh.

Only Sane Man Mikey is the glue of the group, bringing the Goonies together in an adventure, instead of just a bunch of kids hanging out in someone’s living room.  He’s got the initiative, he’s the Determinator, and the Leader, and also, surprisingly, the Heart, in a rare combination.  He’s the one jumping at the call, the Kid Hero armed with the Rousing Speeches in his desperate attempt to save the Goondocks.  It would have been easy to make Mikey the most boring of the bunch, but he’s not, if anything, he’s the most interesting.  He’s certainly the most inspiring.

Mikey is the driving force of the entire story.  Despite the fact that he was reluctant to let his friends in the attic in the first place, once he’s there, he’s instantly pushing for his end goal.  As much as Data is the inventor of the group, when you get right down to it, Mikey is probably the smartest of the bunch.  It’s Mikey who figures out where they need to go, Mikey who leads the Goonies through the tunnels, Mikey who convinces them to persevere, to not ride up Troy’s bucket, to leave Willy’s private stash alone.

He’s dedicated to the point of almost insanity at times, judging from how Brand has to pull him back from going back after the treasure when the cave collapses.  He’s also very interested in One-Eyed Willy himself, and acts like he knows him, or understands him, anyway.

“One-Eyed Willy. Hello. I’m Mike Walsh, you’ve been expecting me. Haven’t you? Well, I made it. I beat you. I got here in once piece. So far. So, that’s why they call you One-Eyed Willy. One-Eyed Willy. We had a lot in common, huh, Willy? You know something Willy? You were the first Goonie.”

Apparently, Mikey sees a little bit of himself in this pirate, perhaps as a fellow leader or adventurer, or even a fellow outsider.

Like I said, Mikey could have been the blandest character in the bunch: just filling in as ‘the leader’ of the group, but instead, he’s as quirky as they come.

Despite the fact that this is an ensemble film, with every character sharing about the same amount of screentime, Mikey is clearly the protagonist, no questions asked.  He is the character with the goal here, and as much as it benefits everyone else, it’s clearly his mission, his quest.  The others are just along for the ride.  Mikey is the character the audience is meant to identify with the most: he gets the most insightful dialogue and we as viewers identify more strongly with him as a character.  

Although he’s one of the last characters introduced to the audience, it’s very clear right away who the story is about based simply on the Protagonist Problem: basically, do they have one?  And while it’s clear that the other Goonies aren’t happy about moving away, none of them are taking it as hard as Mikey is.  He is, immediately, the character with a Problem, and he’s also the only one to jump at a solution.

He’s the idealist.  He’s cool under pressure (for the most part).  He easily takes charge, despite his tamer personality in comparison with the others, even over the older kids, and he’s nice to boot.  His goals are easily defined, he’s active, going after his goals and overcoming obstacles, he seems to be the perfect protagonist, if it wasn’t for one thing…

Mikey never really changes.

Sure, he throws away his inhaler by the end, which could be interpreted as symbolic of development, but honestly, Mikey is very much the same kid at the end of the film that he was at the beginning.  Same personality, same worldview…even the same goals, which is another big protagonist no-no.

Most great protagonists have goals that change from beginning to end of the film, as a sign of their own developing character, but Mikey never does.  Instead, he ends the film getting exactly what he initially set out to get: enough money to save the Goondocks.  Sure, he has the relatively minor goal along the way of ‘staying alive’, but in the grand scheme of narrative stakes, to Mikey, clearly the treasure is all that matters.

The question is…is this a bad thing?

Well…no.

The thing is, Mikey is only one in a group of seven main characters, and while some of them have more screen time than others, when you come down to it, that’s a lot of characters to balance, meaning a lot of dialogue split up, and a lot of audience focus divided.  In other words: Mikey doesn’t get development because he doesn’t have time.  There’s just too much going on for the audience to stack character growth on top of it.

While there’s not nearly enough time from a script perspective, there’s also just no time from a linear perspective, either.

The story of The Goonies takes place around, give or take, a day, and while there are a few stories where development is done over that time, (Such as 12 Angry Men, actually) the fact is, twenty four hours is a really short period of time to change who you are as a person, or even change your goals.  It’s very difficult to cram in the story, the characters, and everything else in such a short time span, and heap a deep, meaningful character arc on top of it.  There’s just no time.

So, does that damage the film?

Not really.  Like I said in the genre article, The Goonies is a roller-coaster adventure of a film, without much in breaks.  There’s a lot going on all at the same time, and honestly, in order to keep the pace up, it’s for the betterment of the film that they didn’t try to cram Mikey’s character development within.

To be fair, it’s not as though he doesn’t change at all.  But he changes about as much as the rest of the cast do, in very similar ways: kind of like his brother.

Brandon “Brand” Walsh fills out the other side of the sibling dynamic between himself and Mikey, the older brother who gets annoyed with him, but is also supposed to be taking care of him.  As much as he starts out the film looking like he’s at least trying to be an Aloof Big Brother, when the chips are down, his Big Brother Instinct comes out, protecting Mikey from actual danger.  Beginning the film as somewhat of a Butt-Monkey, ending up Hoisted by his Own Petard in the form of his exercise equipment, at first, Brand looks like he’s not really going to be terribly involved in Mikey’s Goonie adventure.

In the end, though, Brand turns out to be One of the Kids.  But for careful viewers, that’s not really a surprise.

Even Brand’s first scene, where he interacts with Mikey, it’s pretty clear that although there’s a bickering dynamic between them, there’s also sympathy and affection.  Brand knows that Mikey doesn’t want to leave, he understands and he tells him so.  He hugs him and brings him inside when Mr. Perkins comes by with the papers to sign over the house.  And sure, Brand bullies him a little and shoves him around and Mikey repays the favor by tying him to a chair with his own exercise equipment and running off, but that’s typical sibling stuff, as anyone with siblings can tell you.

Although Brand does initially try to ‘take charge’ and occasionally gives the marching orders, in the end, he leaves most of the leading to Mikey, which is a little strange.  Once or twice he takes over, and is the most protective of the group, but while he may do most of the ‘planning’ here, he lets Mikey’s goals and priorities take center stage for a while.

Brand’s other chief ‘item of note’ concerning characterization is, of course, his relationship with Andy.

It’s mentioned fairly early on into the film that Brand is supposed to go out with her, and we see her once or twice, but it isn’t until she and Stef show up to check on Brand that we get to see any of that relationship.  It’s sweet enough, aside from them constantly choosing the wrong time and place to attempt a first kiss, with Brand taking a side-role of protector for Andy specifically, again, showcasing that defensive side that comes in handy for the rest of the group from time to time.

But there’s more to the Goonies than the Walsh kids.

Probably the most recognizable of the characters from The Goonies is Lawrence “Chunk” Cohen.

Chunk has most of the most memorable lines and scenes in the film, elevating himself in pop culture beyond simply the ‘Fat Comic Relief’ and klutzy, cowardly character that the movie seems to be pigeonholing him into at first.  See, even though Mikey’s the one with the goal and character arc concerning the treasure, Chunk’s character arc revolves around the Fratellis.

Of all the Goonies, Chunk is the first one to get involved in the story.  He is the first character we see indirectly interact with the villains of the story, when he spots the car chase, and by the end of the film, he is the character that has interacted with them the most, being drug around, interrogated, and locked up by them as a result of being left behind by the rest.  Fittingly, his arc has very little to do with One Eyed Willy, and everything to do with the criminal family that he happens to fall into, to the point where they’re almost his arch-nemeses instead of the rest of the Goonies.

While an initial viewing could give viewers a very basic impression of Chunk as just the ‘token fat kid’ of the group, the fact is, he is one of the only characters who gets any real growth.

Chunk is established almost right away as the Boy Who Cried Wolf, a teller of tall-tales that have rendered him completely unbelievable to his friends and the local police force.  By the time he has an actual story to tell, nobody around him is ready to buy it, and honestly, it’s hard to blame them.  Some of his stories do sound ridiculous, and even the one that he’s telling now about the Fratellis would be hard to believe, if the audience didn’t know for certain that he was telling the truth.  Of course, although he is able to feel vindicated when the Goonies discover he’s telling the truth, his tendencies to exaggerate backfire on him spectacularly when the police don’t believe he’s in trouble, and he’s left on his own.

Well, not quite on his own, but more on that in a minute.

Chunk primarily holds up the B-plot of the film on the villain’s side, arriving at the end to play hero and bail the rest of the Goonies out, proving to them, and then the rest of the authorities at the end, that this time, he was right, and proving his bravery after an entire film of attempting to chicken out.  But as impressive as his last-minute heroism is, Chunk isn’t in this alone.

Despite being separated from the group fairly early on, sparing them from his complaints, hunger, and clumsiness, Chunk finds another ally in Sloth, the Fratellis’ brother, and befriends him, forming the ‘Brains’ to Sloth’s brawn, coming in to save the day and even adopting him at the end of the film.

Chunk is the most memorable Goonie, not just for the Hawaiian shirt and plaid-pants combo that he’s rocking, but because he has a lot of very memorable and iconic scenes, possessing a pretty unforgettable (and loud!) personality and an arc: from zero to hero, when nobody, not even his fellow Goonies, expected it, complaining through the entire early adventure, and overall displaying an overwhelming desire to Not Be Here, making it all the more impressive when he goes after them with Sloth to rescue them.

But there’s more to the Goonies than just the leader and the breakout role.

Clark “Mouth” Devereaux is not the easiest kid to get along with.  A Deadpan Snarker Jerk with a Heart of Gold, Mouth is the member of the cast with potentially the most Meaningful Name: he never shuts up.  A classic case of ‘With Friends Like These…’, Mouth comes across like the most antagonistic character in the film other than the actual villains at times, abrasive and loud, bullying the rest of the group and picking fights with Stef.

Unfortunately, Mouth’s…mouth, can get him into trouble.  Quite often, in fact, like when he can’t let well enough alone and ends up getting threatened with having his tongue cut out.

With that said, though, Mouth does have his uses, and they’re not all to do with smuggling treasure in his most distinctive trait.

Fittingly, language is where he comes in handy: he’s the only one who can read (and speak) Spanish, leaving him as the obvious choice to translate the map, and also to translate the Walsh’s housekeeper’s exclamations that the treasure is not entirely lost.  Without him, the treasure hunt is impossible.

Mouth may want the treasure as badly as the rest of them do, but he is far less idealistic than Mikey is about it.  He’s the last of the kids to believe Mikey in the beginning, and while it can be chalked up to his overall personality, there is a dash or two of Hidden Depths implied about him, notably in the wishing-well sequence:

“Yeah, but you know what? This one, this one right here. This was my dream, my wish. And it didn’t come true. So I’m taking it back. I’m taking them all back.”

Armed with a comb and occasionally appearing as though he’s deliberately striking a pose in order to look cool, Mouth is actually one of the first to start falling apart when their lives are in danger, crying and panicking with the best of them.  (Again, he’s only thirteen.)

Despite having the loudest personality, Mouth is content to let Mikey lead the group, hanging back and picking on all of them, but by no means not one of them.

There is, of course, one more thing of note about Mouth as a character, and that is his dynamic with Stef.  The pair carry a belligerent tension, bickering and snapping at each other throughout most of the film before demonstrating genuine affection towards each other (with a deleted scene referenced involving Stef promising to keep Mouth alive when they get pushed off the plank).  It’s a hint at something going on between them for sure, but it’s also a fairly good example of Mouth’s relationships with everybody: he’s a lot more bark than bite, irritating and loud for sure, but a loyal friend who’s more than ready to help you look for treasure, even if he doesn’t 100% believe in it at first.

Like the rest, he doesn’t change a whole lot from beginning to end, with the adventure perhaps simply knocking some of his cockiness away and even leaving him a little nicer, but again, just like Mikey, it’s hard to say: this is all over the course of one, very exciting day.  More on that later, though.

After all, Mouth’s hardly the last Goonie of the bunch.

Richard “Data” Wang is the inventor of all things Awesome but Impractical, falling somewhere between Bungled Inventor and Gadgeteer Genius.  The Smart Guy, Data is good with his Homemade Inventions for sure, but there’s a bit more to him than that.

While the other Goonies (especially Chunk and Mouth) can best be remembered for being annoying or clumsy, or dropping things, or talking too much or too loudly, or setting off booby traps, Data is actually pretty even-keel.  He’s excitable, and he really doesn’t want to move to Detroit, but overall, he’s fairly content to be the least talkative Goonie, letting his Dynamic Entries speak for themselves.

He’s a smart kid, and he actually is the only one who one-ups the Fratellis at any time, using his inventions to trip them up and hurt them, after the same inventions saved his life earlier.  Data certainly does have a flair for the dramatic (best seen when telling Mikey that he won’t be taken alive) and is an energetic kid, proving himself as reckless as the rest, but he has a good head on his shoulders.  He’s the one who discovers the counterfeit machine, and it’s fairly safe to say that without him and his Slick Shoes, the Goonies probably wouldn’t have made it out alive.

Like the others, Data doesn’t change much – in fact, he probably changes the least.  This could be due to the fact that again, this is all over the course of roughly 24 hours, but it’s also possibly just a side-effect of being the most even-keeled of the bunch: he’s quieter, and therefore, we hear less from him, meaning we see less of his flaws.  Still though, Data’s a solid character, hugely entertaining, likeable, and memorable.

Now for the other outliers:

Andrea “Andy” Carmichael begins the story as first The Cheerleader and Dude Magnet, and then The Load.  Clearly not used to this style of Goonie Adventure, Andy kind of becomes a Hysterical Woman throughout a good portion of the journey, needing to be comforted a few times in order to keep her head.  It’s hard to blame her: between the skeletons, the guns, and getting locked in a tunnel is pretty frightening, but Andy doesn’t do a whole lot (especially early on, during her Heroic BSoD) and manages to not retain much of a personality throughout most of the film, chiefly appearing at first to serve as a token female character and to be in love with Brand.

But there is more to her than that.  

Even early on, Andy demonstrates a little more backbone when she elbows Troy in the lip and ditches him to go find Brand, and although she initially just follows the Goonies to hang out with Brand (and then to escape the Fratellis), she ends up becoming one of them when she makes the choice to stay instead of riding up the wishing well, sending up his letterman jacket instead.  It’s a big step for her, a demonstration of her true alliances (a deleted scene was to include her being sworn in as an official Goonie at this point, actually), and sets her up for the rest of the film as being more ready and willing to actively participate in the adventure.

Near the end, Andy has to come through to save everyone, as she’s the only one who can play the piano even a little bit, and it falls on her to play the bone organ in order to get them away from the Fratellis and towards the treasure.

Andy actually has some more growth than a few of the others: she steadies out and truly does change, becoming a true Goonie by the end of the film, proving herself more capable than when she began.  Although she doesn’t seem to have a stake in the treasure, she’s just as determined by the end to get it, and celebrates with the rest of them by the end.

In a way, she shares that with the other Goonie outlier: Stef.

Stephanie “Stef” Steinbrenner doesn’t really seem to serve a whole lot of purpose within the story besides being another girl Goonie so there isn’t just one.  She’s a friend of Andy’s, the Tomboy to her Girly Girl, who splits off to join her to find Brand and then ends up swept along with the rest of the adventure, and there doesn’t seem to be much more to her than that.  She’s a Sarcastic Devotee, who feels Surrounded by Idiots: she trades snark with the best of them and tends to feel (rightfully so) that the people she’s around aren’t exactly geniuses.  She’s loyal though, and sticks by Andy and the other Goonies until the end, proving just as determined to get to the treasure and get out alive as the others.

Stef serves as a reality check, another cynic who’s just as frightened as the rest of them, like Andy, without a stake in the final treasure, and while she’s never officially branded a Goonie, the implication by the end is clear.  She sort of takes on a belligerent ‘big sister’ role throughout most of the film, and although she doesn’t have much of an arc, she is entertaining to watch, which honestly sums up the entire cast pretty well.

The characters of The Goonies do not exactly ‘grow’.  There are small things: Andy’s growing courage, Chunk being finally right, Mikey’s growth as a leader, Data’s inventions being useful, Mouth taking some of his snarky edge off, and Brand being a better big brother, but honestly, these are very minor things in the grand scheme of the story.

The characters in The Goonies are not deep, whether it’s the actual Goonies themselves or the villainous Fratellis, who are mostly characterized by striking a balance between being comedic and being a genuine threat.  There are no huge life-lessons being learned by these people, and they aren’t really doing a lot of growing so much as they are running for their lives.

In a film that is essentially a ‘roller coaster’, The Goonies is not designed to have seven major characters with fulfilling character arcs: like I said before, there’s simply no time.  It’d bog the story down for each character to have a moment of growth, to change significantly from beginning to end.  In this case, the best thing about the characters is actually their consistency from beginning to end: there’s little change, and as a result, the audience never has to recalibrate to something else going on within the story.

In other films, this would be a huge problem.

A feature-length film where there is no discernible character change is typically not a good call, but in this case, it works for multiple reasons.  The story is too fast paced and focused on too much to allow for consistent breaks in plot that allow for character moments, and with the extremely short timespan, a big change would actually come across as forced and unrealistic.  The characters are children forced into a tight spot, where their chief concern is their own lives.  There simply isn’t the option open for development.

However, where the film lacks on ‘growth’ of characters, it makes up for in everything else.

The chief purpose of a character is to be there for the audience to like, to be invested in.  There are actually plenty of films where characters don’t change a lot, classic movies that are well-liked because the characters, although unchanging, are hugely entertaining and interesting.  Films like Back to the Future or Ferris Bueller’s Day Off don’t suffer from characters who don’t do any changing due to the fact that the main characters are fun to watch and have the audience’s attention and interest.

Which is just what The Goonies does.

Everyone can find a Goonie to relate to: the leaders, the loudmouths, the geniuses, the attention-seekers, everyone has a place here, and even adults who have hopefully grown out of some of the more immature kid-like behavior, there’s still the glimmer of familiarity in these kids.  Like I mentioned before, we relate to these kids, and we want to see them win.

The Goonies as a story is designed to have simple, relatable characters for the audience to remember, and if that’s the goal, then it works perfectly.  There are no deep characters with complex motivations here, and that’s a good thing: it fits the tone of the film consistently and coherently.  Every character here is likeable in some way, memorable, for sure, and sticks with an audience enough that the audience wants to stick with them too, and wants them to succeed.

In the end, the characters of The Goonies make you care about them, make you root for them.  They carry the story and do it all in a way that’s plenty of fun to watch, and when it comes down to it: that’s exactly what characters should do.

Whether you like or hate them, a character is there to make you care, and The Goonies certainly do their job.  They leave a strong impact, and as a result, we remember these characters and their quirks long after the movie is over for a reason.

Join me next time where we’ll be looking at the 80s cultural impact on the creation of The Goonies.  Thank you so much for reading, and I hope to see you in the next article.

#The Goonies #The Goonies 1985 #80s #1985 #Film #Movies #PG #Adventure #Comedy #Family #Sean Astin #Josh Brolin #Jeff Cohen #Corey Feldman #Kerri Green #Martha Plimpton #Ke Huy Quan #Richard Donner

[yanderecandystore]

Can we have the s/o in the old eldritch one get pregnant n stuff

Oh well, it seems like the antichrist will be born-

Well not literally, but kinda.

I think… That maybe I should warn y'all about some possible disasters.

Tags?/Tw??: size difference boo; curious eldritch boy; illusions; apocalyptic world; also mentions of other entities and some of the events that happened in A Bad Dream. Also I'm a dumbass who should have took some medicine instead of writing while having a headache.

🍭꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍰꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖🍭

Golden Years [Yandere!Eldritch x Pregnant!Reader - Short Fanfiction and possibly a follow-up story]:

It's been five years since the Earth's sky has been broken apart. The red clouds above form a connection to the other world that creatures like him came from. A portal, in a way.

To humanity, this was the end. But to them, it was the beginning of something.

Something interesting.

Not every single entity on Ibu's home was on Earth of course, it's a really small place for so many cosmic entities. And it is not like all of them have an interest in this small rock, only a few, like Ibu himself.

Always the curious one. Most would consider him naive, and possibly childish, if the "concept" of children was commonly known throughout his "brothers and sisters".

He was only a couple of stars old. 687 stars have been born and have died throughout his entire existence, to be exact. Which was pretty young compared to his "peers".

Not that they really cared about keeping up with their age, it was mostly used to devalue each other's nonsense. Someone around his age would be considered foolish regardless of what his morals and ethics were.

But he doesn't really care, he prefers to take his time and learn than pretend he knows everything in the universe. He enjoys being curious the way he is, is more fun to learn about things if you truthfully explore them.

And learning about humans while interpreting to be one is probably the best form of learning he could have ever found!

It's extremely exciting to him, in five years he has learned so much. He learned that humans fall easily into his illusions, that humans are small and easy to carry, that even if a human is in his illusion they won't notice the odd feelings of being high up or being held by bigger hands, oh! Humans are actually pretty warm, and that their living habitats are tiny but he can kinda squeeze himself in.

Which isn't the most comfortable thing, but he knows how to deal with it.

He learned that humans call each other by names depending on their relationship status and how much a human cares for them. He learned that humans are fragile, and that they like small things, and that they-

Oh, it's just so many things you know? He could keep going on, but it isn't exactly human like to point out obvious things like that.

You told him that. You've been really helpful with helping him understand your kind better.

His companions don't really agree with his actions. While he is playing "dollhouse" (he saw small humans doing this ritual of playing with inanimate objects and pretending to have an "a family", he found that so fascinating), his peers are doing more "fun things".

Like slaving humans, or executing humans, or trapping them in pocket dimensions, or adding them to their ever growing collection (like a friend of his who is obsessed with collecting life forms), or destroying everything and everyone that they meet in the way, like his sister!

She showed him a big wall the other day, it was bigger than any human, or even house. They both didn't understand the point of such obstacle. She said it probably took centuries to put it up. She simply smashed it down like it was nothing.

He doesn't know why she does these types of things, but she still finds enjoyment in doing them, so he would just let her have her fun.

She tried to convince him to give up on understanding you and just let loose, as humans would say.

But, he doesn't find it fun at all. He tried it once on a really annoying human, he thinks it was your mate.

He can't remember for sure. He tries to forget unpleasant things. Yet, he still remembers that day.

Could you stop it please? It's getting annoying.

There he was, the annoying human, and some others trying to… Hurt him? He doesn't understand what they were trying to do, whatever it was it wasn't as effective as they thought it was. They were clearly aiming at his eyes, but it only made them itchy.

You never stop, do you?

At that time he didn't remember that they couldn't understand him. He was getting angry, and it seemed normal to speak in his own language rather than communicating on yours.

"- Hey… What is happening love?" You asked him, poor thing, he wondered what you could possibly be seeing. Considering his illusions were really effective on you, he assumes that you were only seeing your husband and a bunch of pricks trying to hurt him.

In your eyes, he looks like your true husband, and your real husband feels like a stranger. It's all that he can do for now, interpret your old mate.

Also, love, you have some bad taste at picking partners, this little human seems a little too possessive, don't you agree?

Of course there are a couple of rebellious humans, trying to survive and fight for their freedom and what not. He really wishes he could care about them, but honestly, how can they expect to win a "war" that is not even happening?

It's not a fair fight anyway, so why bother so much? And also, they don't even know that the most important part of "killing" one of his kind is completely destroying their mask. Which is close to almost impossible.

Honestly, why even bother…

"- L-love? Are you okay?"

"- Yes, don't worry about it." He learned how to perfectly imitate the other human's voice. It's not exactly a difficult thing to do, especially for the likes of him, but hey, he thinks he deserves some praises for doing it.

Anyway, they thought that they could have a chance against him. And although he wasn't looking for a fight, he almost did kill them out of rage.

While holding you in one hand, he made his way towards the crowd shooting at him. One little slap to the ground was enough to shake it and unbalance them. It's kinda silly from his perspective.

How bothersome, if I take these would you stop?

He took and broke (although accidentally) the guns in his fingers. He was actually planning on studying them but, oh well, he can always ask you later about how they function.

Even when he already lost, your ex partner still tries to pick up a fight. It's taking every fiber of his being to not put this insufferable little creature into an everlasting nightmare in his pocket dimension. He picked the annoying one up, while the others were trying to pick some extra equipment they brought.

It wasn't so difficult to trade places with you, but if you keep acting foolish, I don't think you'll exist for too long.

Yelling, after cursing, after more yelling, some crying in the mix. Ibu can't be bothered right now, you two were just going back home.

Can't a being tall as a building go home with his tiny mate in peace? The world has already ended, so why bother stoping him from living his own immortal life?

"- She doesn't love you, and ya know that."

…

Oh.

…. Oh…

"- Excuse me?"

"- Oh! So you can speak now-" He yelled after hearing Ibu speak in his own language. That prick heard every bit of suffering that he put him through, yet-

"- Repeat." Ibu already knew what he said, he just needed to hear it, again...

"- What?" … Just to be sure…

"- Repeat." … That what he heard was correct...

"- … What if I don't?" … And that he had a free pass...

"- … What would your intestines look like if they were pulled from inside out?" … To lose his patience with this one.

It seemed like he could "let loose" this time around.

If only he had payed better attention at you instead of that insolent pest.

He had closed his hands a little too harshly at that moment. Even if it was unconsciously, the damage was already done.

He closed his hand, and accidentally (he swears it was an accident!) Broke one of your legs.

He dropped the other human at your sudden scream. The low sound of something breaking wasn't really reassuring.

I mean, two legs were broken that day, yours and your ex lover's. But he didn't care about the other one, so let's ignore his screams of agony-

To his sister, breaking one of your bones wasn't exactly the worst possible thing that could happen. Actually, if it was her the one holding you, she would probably do that intentionally.

As to her, it was fun to hurt humans like you. But to Ibu it wasn't, it was terrible! He really didn't mean to.

He was plagued by the sudden feeling of guilty overflowing him. It was probably the first time he ever felt like this. It was probably the first time he ever apologized for something.

I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm so sorry please shhhh I'm really sorry I'm sorry I'll fix it I'll fix it I'm sorry I'm sorry

Woah, that was… A terrible experience even remembering gives him headaches. And he shouldn't even have headaches! Stress can lead to his mask breaking.

That would be really unfortunate.

You didn't seem to remember what happened the day after, so he had to help you get better slowly. I guess another thing he learned in these five years was how to fix human bones.

But that was in the past, right? It didn't matter now, right?

Yeah… It didn't… Mattered.

Or it shouldn't. He never really relaxed after that incident.

Not only did he feel incapable of taking care of you, as he started thinking a simple blow of wind could make you fall. But he also felt on edge whenever he remembered those words.

" She doesn't love you."

That shouldn't have been so impactful as it was. Maybe he truly was too soft. He knows better than to listen to the delusions of that man.

He knows that you love him. He knows that! He really… He really hopes he knows that.

He really hopes it is true.

You started acting a little weird recently, he doesn't know how you're feeling and what you are thinking, so he started feeling like maybe you don't love him…

You normally made calls to your friends, although the telephone hasn't been functional since four years ago, since if you truly were interacting with other people there could be a chance of you breaking the illusion. You would tell them what was on your mind while you thought he wasn't listening.

You haven't written in your diary, you haven't made any recent notes on your phone or computer, and you haven't told him what you were hiding.

He wouldn't know how to react if you decided to get away from him. He would probably put you inside his pocket dimension, or probably take you to his own world.

No… That place is too dangerous. What can he do??

He was sitting on the sofa contemplating this last few weeks you've been acting differently. And that phrase keeps popping up in his mind, and is starting to make him sick.

And the thought of you being sad or mad at him from when he broke your leg is starting to eat him from inside.

What can he do-

"- Love? Are you okay?"

"- Oh, don't worry about it… I'm just thinking about some stuff."

"- Is it related to work?"

Oh yeah, "work", he kinda hides outside the house whenever you think he is at work. Even if he wanted to experience a job for the first time and know how humans function under social stress twenty two hours a day through five days, each every single week, there weren't any jobs available.

As more than a half of the population was gone or dead.

"- Yeah… It is." He learned how to deal with this type of question. He saw a lot of tv shows with you, and they all mentioned how jobs are essentially torture chambers that suck the energy out of humans in exchange of money.

Those shows weren't lying or exaggerating, right?

"- Well, I… I think you should relax, and maybe take a break, I never saw you taking a vacation, maybe this is a good time, love."

"- Yeah…. I would love to spend more time inside." Although he literally just watches you doing mundane things all day everyday, because to him all of those things are incredible and breathtaking.

"- I… I have something to tell you…" You seemed a little concerned, was something wrong?

"- What is it?"

"- H-here." You were worried that his reaction might be a little negative, or not as excited as you were. He works every single day, you feel like this type of surprise you probably make him worry more.

But then again, there wasn't really a way to keep this a secret. You're still wondering how hasn't he noticed your belly or your morning sickness, but you also didn't think it was because of pregnancy, so, I guess you're both equally naive?

He is looking at the pregnancy test, not knowing it's a pregnancy test or what pregnancy even is. So he doesn't really understand what it is until you say it out loud.

"- I'm going to have a baby, love."

He is still visibly confused.

"- A… Tiny human?"

"- Pfft, yes! Of course it's a tiny human. Oh gosh, how can you be silly in a time like this."

Yeah, he is a riot, isn't he?

Stars, help him understand what is happening, please.

"- That's kinda what I like about you, you know? You're funny, you never take anything too seriously." You tell him, being fully honest.

His presence feels comforting in a world so serious and dull.

He isn't aware of how to feel, he is confused and extremely excited about this revelation.

Would the baby be human? A hybrid of some form? Would it have his own features? Would it have a mask? Would giving birth to them possibly break the illusion?

He should consider all of the possibilities but… He is just, so happy! This the weirdest most confusing experience he ever had, yet he is absolutely delighted by this outcome.

He loves you so much, he really does, and he knows that now. He knows that this is a proof of love, that there is absolutely nothing that can separate you from him.

You two would be spinning around the living room, full cliche style.

Although, again, he doesn't really fit in the living room all that well. So he can't really do that, but you get the sentiment, right?

Stars, this is perfect, absolutely perfect.

"- I love you [Y/N]!"

"- I love you too, Cameron!"

It's been five years, and yet you kept saying the same name over and over again.

At first he didn't mind, it was a nice sounding name. But as time went on, being called by your ex's name is starting to become troublesome.

"- Maybe I can fix that later." Maybe he can drop the charade and give you one of his many names.

Having you call him "Ibu" would be so special to him.

"- Hun? What do you mean?"

Oh nothing, really.

🍭꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍰꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖🍭

#yandere #yandere oc #yandere x reader #sheep's stuff #yandere oc x reader #yandere eldritch #yandere short fanfiction #yandere fanfic #yandere fanfiction #special delivery request #special delivery scenarios #yandere scenario #yandere scenarios

[ampleappleamble]

—

It was a day's hike to the cliffs, and a day's hike back. Pallegina went anyway, of course.

It was a good opportunity to assess the members of this ragtag band she was joining up with, as combatants and as people. Overall, she was fairly impressed with their martial skills– their tactics and group cohesion were sound, but she was sure to make note of their evident lack of formal training and quality equipment. She'd found herself pleasantly surprised at their generosity and inclusiveness, sharing food and drink and smoke and stories as freely with their feathered newcomer as they did with one another. No one had even brought up her "divine heritage" until they'd been sitting around the campfire that first night, and the aumaua who'd broached the subject had actually managed to look appropriately bashful as he'd done so. Although in retrospect, an Avian Godlike woman in a brotherhood of paladins probably wasn't too outlandish a concept for these kith, considering that their squad leader was apparently an Awakened Watcher.

Pallegina had been fielding annoying, invasive questions posed by strangers about her body and her soul for her entire life, but Axa was a newly-minted freak, it seemed, and so was not quite sick of talking about it just yet. And her friends weren't either: with minimal prompting, Aloth had recounted her nightmares and her past life memories, Edér had remembered her staring at the tree in Gilded Vale for nearly half an hour, Kana had practically rhapsodized about her conversations with ghosts in caves and in dungeons. And the next morning, as the group stood on the bluff overlooking the sea, Sagani had handed Axa a misshapen little lump of adra, and Pallegina had watched as the orlan peered through it and into the In-Between.

She'd been told the woman was a Watcher, and she'd more or less accepted it as truth, but the paladin hadn't exactly been expecting a demonstration just yet. After a few minutes of watching the little woman sway to and fro in the wind, apparently mesmerized by the adra carving the dwarf had given her, concern for her wellbeing had compelled Pallegina to approach and take her by the shoulders, attempting to shake her out of it before she wobbled her way over the cliff's edge.

"Everything... all right in there?" she'd muttered, lightly slapping the little woman's cheek.

"Adra arch," Axa had rasped in reply, violet eyes wild and unfixed. Sagani had gently pried the carving from her fuzzy hands then, smiled compassionately at the other two women before asking Edér where in the Dyrwood an adra arch might stand.

That was... very strange. But stranger things have happened, Pallegina had reminded herself. She'd kept reminding herself of that as they'd made their way back to the city, as she listened to the others' stories of reincarnated souls and mysterious cults, dead brothers and ancient tablets and a haunted castle this eccentric little woman called home.

Ambassador Agosti had been less than pleased to receive his agent nearly three days after Verzano had been cut loose, and accompanied by a pack of disheveled strangers no less. But Axa was nothing if not a fierce defender of her troops, it seemed, and although she'd made a valiant effort to keep her comments civil, eventually Agosti had frayed the little woman's last nerve with his dismissive arrogance and insinuated threats, finally ending up on the receiving end of a tongue-lashing himself for once. Pallegina had known then that she'd chosen her new companions wisely, biting the inside of her cheek to keep from grinning at Agosti as he stammered and sweated under the orlan's indignant outburst.

Her amusement at Axa's antics had been soundly quashed, however, by the new assignment laid upon her shoulders, one that she had dreaded might be in the works but had hoped would never actually be implemented– the negotiation of a new trade agreement between the Vailian Republics and Eir Glanfath, one that took blatant, vicious advantage of the Dyrwood's badly weakened state due to the Hollowborn crisis. It made sense in the short term, financially and practically, for the merchants of the Republics to step in and take the reins where the Dyrwoodans would not. But what gave Pallegina pause were the long term political implications of essentially kicking the Dyrwood while it was down, especially now at such a crucial juncture in the deciding of the country's legislation regarding animancy. If the Ducs Bels willfully chose to make an enemy of the Dyrwood now, it could have long-reaching consequences that could do untold damage to the Republics in the years to come, particularly for the animancy community. Animancers were already under attack in this country, superstitious types blaming them for causing this soul plague by somehow invoking the wrath of the gods, as well as for their ill-fated attempts at curing the nation's blighted children. Would the people of the Dyrwood, fiery and reactionist as they were, still tolerate animancy at all should the Republics, animancy's shining champion, stab them in the back while they were at their weakest and least reasonable? What would become of Vailian animancy without competition to keep them sharp, or collaborative efforts to keep them abreast of the latest developments? Even if animancy was permitted to continue in the Dyrwood, its practitioners would be loathe to share their discoveries with their Vailian counterparts, leading to an inevitable stagnation in the soul sciences– or even worse, the Republics could potentially fall behind the Dyrwood, languishing in the past while the Dyrwood moved ahead, forging the future without them...

No. This was not permissible, not after all the Republics and its animancers had done for her. But still, she had her orders. Now all she had to do was carry them out, one way or another.

"Twin Elms is a good long way from here," Sagani reassured her afterwards at their table at the Charred Barrel, swirling her ale around in her tankard and feeding her fox under her chair. "And Axa'll find more than enough distractions along the way, I'm sure. Plenty of time to come up with some sort of... creative interpretation of your orders."

Pallegina tried to smile, but only produced a weak grimace. "Then I hope our Watcher friend is more 'creative' than I am. I have many strengths, but subterfuge has never been one of them. And one can only openly defy the powers that be so many times before their patience runs out." She stared pensively into her wine as she spoke, couldn't help but think of Verzano's fate, Agosti's warnings.

"I'll drink to that," Edér mumbled around his mouthful of roast pork and potato, raising his cup in a commiserative gesture before knocking it back. "Axa ain't much for bullshittin' folks– not as far as I've seen, anyway– but she's got a knack for solvin' problems, and for pushin' her luck 'n' gettin' away with it. If anyone can finagle some kinda deal that'll keep your ducs happy without totally screwin' over the Dyrwood, I'd wager it'd be her."

"Elegantly stated, Edér," Aloth deadpanned, rolling his eyes and pushing his food around on his plate. "Speaking of Axa, she's been away from the table for quite a while now..." The elf lifted his head, anxiously scanning the throng of diners, drunks, and debutantes. "If I recall, she only said she wanted to catch up with Ingroed and Nonton, but I don't see her at the bar anymore."

"Ingroed and Nonton?" Pallegina glanced around idly and spotted the little woman almost immediately– that bold red hair was unmistakable, even when mostly obscured behind the fat asses and round bellies of the taller kith surrounding her. "More friends, I assume?"

"Couple of folks from my hometown, Gilded Vale. She helped 'em outta a rough spot." The blond man glanced over at the bar, smiling at his former neighbors.

Kana looked up from his dinner, face flushed with drink. "Ah! Are those the ones who set a trap for the dead man in the bear's den?" He beamed at Pallegina, practically glowing with enthusiasm. "You must have her tell you the tale, my lady. A truly inspiring account of our Watcher's unique insight at work. She learned of their betrayal from the spirit of the victim, you see! But there's a tragic twist–"

"Hey, now, don't spoil the ending, big fella, you wasn't even there. Let her tell it." Edér had caught sight of Axa too, just as she'd turned away from the well-dressed elf she'd been speaking with, and he beckoned the redhead back to their table with a wave of his hand. The stranger watched her go, nervously fiddling with his ostentatious jewelry as she sauntered back to her friends, while Pallegina tried to remember where she'd seen him before, his eyes widening in alarm as he caught her staring at him.

"Talking about me behind my back again?" Axa sighed, grinning and shaking her head as she clambered back into her seat. "Gods, I can't leave you scoundrels alone for a second. They didn't tell you a bunch of ghost stories, did they?" She winked at Pallegina, and the paladin noticed just how tired the orlan looked.

"Only the true ones!" Kana laughed a bit too loudly– not atypical of him, but the alcohol certainly amplified his natural exuberance. Aloth delicately scooted his chair away from the overly jolly giant, vexation plain on his face.

If Axa noticed anything unusual, she didn't mention it, only chuckled and took a long drag from her pipe. "Found out where your adra arch might be, Sagani. Turns out it's somewhere over by Twin Elms, believe it or not." She glanced up at Pallegina, a cautious little smile on her tawny face. "Unfortunately, I've also heard tell that the road leading there is badly flooded right now due to inclement weather. So it looks like we'll have some time to kill before we can head over that way."

"Belfetto," Pallegina sighed. She appreciated the attempt to cheer her up, letting her know she had time to decide how to handle the Ducs' request, but she had a feeling that the longer she dwelled on her predicament, the more it would weigh on her mind.

Aloth leaned close to the little woman. "I take it this means we're to head for the catacombs on the morrow, then?" He looked simultaneously anxious and eager, as though preparing to take on a task he knew to be important but especially onerous. A familiar burden, Pallegina mused.

"Ah... perhaps," Axa replied, looking away quickly. "There are a few other things I'd like to tend to first, though, if you're all amenable. I was just talking to that elf over there, the one in the fancy robes with all the gaudy jewelry, and he's asked me to do him a favor. See, he has this friend who's a courtesan at the, uh, at the Salty Mast..."

She winced as everyone at the table put down their forks and goblets and gave her their undivided attention.

Pallegina downed the rest of her wine.

—

#pillars of eternity #fic wip #poe anthem infinitum #writing pallegina really takes it outta me #so serious and dutiful #gotta get back to my strengths: dick and fart jokes #and making everyone else react to axa's wacky antics

[therealsehinton]

please elaborate on your rachel berry likeability. i hope one of those points is changing the actress to someone other than lea michele and not having her hog the spotlight, because the other people were just as great. sure she hit high notes, but omg, what's the point of character and vocal diversity, if she's the main choice for big numbers??? she. was. annoying🙄🙄🙄

OK this is like so much to talk about it was 15 pages of notes so I will try to keep it concise and basically do bullet points.

▪︎basically one of the 1st things I wrote down was it would be more interesting to see Rachel's insecurities with being adopted and how that plays out into how she interacts with everybody currently. And I was talking about how in that sense it isn't necessarily that she's over confident and that she thinks she's the best singer in the glee club, as she is portrayed in the show, but rather that she has a compulsive need to impress people because she feels like that's the only way she can get them to stick around and love her. and that's how she coped with her adoptive father's growing up and now she's just an extremely hard worker, because the attention she gets from working hard is like her way of love

and I made it explicitly clear in my notes that Rachel doesn't think she's the best singer of the glee club, like she does in the show, because I said her thinking she's the best singer isn't a flaw it's just being ignorant. instead I wrote that she thinks she's the best in the glee club because she thinks that she is the one who takes it more seriously. and I think that's more valid and I think while that is still flawed and does still give her some superiority complex, that it's more understandable and already makes her 100% less annoying

▪︎ another bullet point I had was simply to make Rachel like canon neurodivergent. I don't like when people see a rude insensitive overall cruel character and then decide to headcanon them as neurodivergent because I don't like the stigma it gives that ND people are rude and have absolutely no common sense or kindness. so my interpretation of this has a lot more layers to it, I don't think of Rachel Berry as ND because of the rude or insensitive things she says but rather because of other things: such as how seriously she takes her music and her social awkwardness that's very relatable.

A point I made on this is that musical theatre could then be her hyper fixation, which I think is super interesting and ties a lot of her character together. it explains why she takes it so seriously and it would explain why she's so invested in making sure everybody else sees musical theatre the way she does, and when people get recognised for it when they don't even love it to the amount that she loves it it makes sense that she gets upset--because that's basically her life in her eyes. I also said that I feel bad sometimes because its not fun to be called annoying and a lot of people, especially ND people, can relate to that feeling. but the thing is Rachel is annoying. she opens her mouth and she is annoying. so if she was ND, I feel like that would make her more sympathetic. like in that sense, that's genuinely just her personality, she's not trying to hurt anyone's feelings or be cruel. when people call her annoying it's just gonna hit so close to home, because sometimes you're just being yourself and you don't even realize it, and then people call you annoying sometimes just because your feeling happy, you know?

▪︎ overall I think this can tie her story together in the more interesting way. like for example Rachel has been bullied her entire life because of things that she can't control, and so now she just feels more comfortable being alone and not working with anyone else. because she does that people think that she's rude or bossy or thinks that she's better than everybody else, when really that's just how she copes. and sure that trauma of hers can lead to her being rude to people, because she really couldn't care less about whether or not they like her, or at least she thinks that she couldn't care less, but overall this is just how she handles being bullied all her life.

she doesn't feel the need to establish meaningful relationships, which is what makes someone like Finn really special to her. it's the one person she feels like actually sees her and cares about her and so she cares about him in return, and that would explain why their bond is so strong more so than in the original show

▪︎ I definitely want that annoying and bad intentioned spirit about her to be erased. like I think in fixing her character, that whole aspect of her needs to be gone. she can still be flawed and 2 dimensional without her overall just being, well, Lea Michelle. which is why I think that whole "hard worker who takes music seriously" aspect would much more benefit her character if it she were portrayed to be a very stoic person who takes everything in her life seriously so she's not a brat and she's not spoiled, she's just deadly serious about everything--which can often make people annoying. obviously she can still be spoiled and arrogant, but to lead someone's personality like that isn't the best choice. I feel like Lea Michelle played her as a brat first and a hard worker second, and if that were switched it would be much much better

▪︎make her be played by anyone other than Lea Michell

▪︎take away her insensitive and racist comments, to be fair everyone had those comments as some point and glee would overall be better if Ryan Murphy recognized racism written by a white man isn't funny

ALSO ALSO I wrote down that Mr Schue should give Rachel a bunch of solos because he feels bad that she has no friends 😭 and later on as she establishes relationships with everyone, he expands that to other people

#se hinton #can it‚ nini! 😼 #glee #rachel berry #lea michelle #this was way too long

[bunnylouisegrimes]

Episode 9 Review (The Future: What Does It Hold?)

Tagging @coldsoba per request

This episode was a headache for me. I was anticipating it, and although it wasn’t entirely bad and it wasn’t the worst, I think this episode highlights all the bad aspects of this season and brings them together. It brings some of the good that this season brought out together as well, but it’s evident to me now that we’re reaching the end so far that the bad is outweighing the good. This episode has me worried about the future of the series, and angry overall. I’m concerned that if this series does continue and has a season 3, it won’t be good, and it will turn into a shit show like The Walking Dead did (they want a season 3, although, based on the low ratings and low viewership, AMC might cancel, no one truly knows yet, especially if BBC and all that other stuff helps boost it).

Before I start this review, I’d like to say right here and now: this is a pretty critical analysis, and possibly has a bunch of unpopular opinions, but I’m saying it anyways. I’m mad, I’m annoyed, and I’m ticked. Last week’s episode ticked me off, this... Oh, man... just know I’m cool if you disagree with me, but I’m hoping by the end you all understand why I feel this way.

Now, don’t get me wrong: like most episodes of this show from this season, despite entire scenes and plot points being bad, it has great moments to enjoy. Did this episode contain lots of action and intensity? Hell yes, and I liked that. Did it stay true to the book ending so far? In a few ways, yes. Pretty much all the ways it didn’t due to the changes they made that were already questionable were the things I didn’t like, which leads me to this: Do I like the direction the story is going, based on what we know and have so far? Hell no. Of course, we don’t know 100% the direction it’s going until next week’s episode, but right now, I’m very on the fence.

Because there is a lot of bad I’m going to discuss, let’s get the good out of the way.

Lou and Vic in the beginning, as per usual, are sweet and I love them. Tabitha and Lou’s interaction was sweet as well. Seeing Charlie frightened and shook was oddly cute, but also funny. And Wayne and Charlie’s interaction... I’m sorry, it was just adorable. I like the idea of Maggie and Vic going to Christmasland together, that was a good choice (although now... I’m uncertain).

To begin the negativity, we’ll start with Charlie and the house scene. I like Charlie confronting his own fears, it’s a very interesting concept. I find it kinda stupid and confusing Charlie wouldn’t know this house exists in his own mind, I mean, it is a part of his own mind, even if it was in the back of it. Why would he not know? Despite that, we’re gonna move onto the meat and potatoes. Now, Cassie’s POV, based on how she was presented in the show (which I still hate, btw, and I am greatly annoyed with how she is not the abuser she was in the book, but I’ve discussed this already a million times), makes sense. We get why she’s pissed, she should be, although I don’t think she understands that her ex-husband had all of this shit happen to him as far as creating Christmasland and becoming a vampire and all that by having a mental snap. It all happened due to his mental pressure. He didn’t have full control (if any control!) over that entire situation. It happened, his life depended on souls and energy from that moment on, and he had to make do with the shitty end of the stick being presented to him. Christmasland is both good and bad, and vampirism is both good and bad, and Charlie has to try to make do with what he can to give himself and his daughter happiness, and focus on the positives. Cassie could’ve maybe given him at least that credit, but she makes it out like, “You’ve brought her happiness in presents and candy, not making her a woman.” Uh... Cassie? Charlie and Millie became vampires out of his control. All this shit happened, how the hell could he reverse all of it? Is there anyway he could? It’s not even explained if he can, but the writers ignore this fact and make it out to be like, “Look, he’s so evil!” Writers, is there anyway he could change these things, even if he wanted to? “Well, no, not exactly, but look, he’s still evil!” So... you’re not even allowing him to have an opportunity to change, and then when he’s stuck in the situation and making the best out of it, even if it isn’t 100% the best way... he’s still super heinous and evil? “Yes!” Okay... whatever... see this is another reason why it annoys me how they’re writing Charlie as “the worst person in the world,” when really, he isn’t. He’s not an angel, but he is not as evil as this show wants to present. Pretty much all of Cassie’s criticisms are valid, but she could’ve at least given Charlie some credit. Nope! But the thing that really bothered me in the back of my mind was how much better this scene would’ve been had they actually written his backstory properly. I kept thinking how much better it would’ve been if an abusive Cassie comes back to haunt Charlie and taunt him, degrading him, and mocking him, how much more sense it would’ve made. And if Millie pointed these things out to him, it might’ve changed his mind some (he would think, “oh, even my daughter kinda agrees with the abuser”). It works here with the way they portrayed her, despite the point I mentioned about Charlie making the best of shit falling flat on Cassie’s end, but it would’ve been 1000% better if they made her an abuser and she scared Charlie, then Millie brings up similar points and Charlie’s POV starts to change a bit.

(Plus, I’d like to add that by doing that, you’re setting potential up for a Charlie redemption arch, and he wouldn’t have to die, Vic and Maggie wouldn’t have to die, and season 3 has interesting potential, and you still have your main characters that we enjoy).

On the topic of this scene, here is a take a friend of mine gathered from it that I definitely can see as well: The point they were trying to make in this scene is that Charlie is a coward. This is their interpretation of Cassie being ‘abusive,’ they didn't leave it out (her being angry at him) like we thought they would. They wanted to give her a concrete reason to hate him so much and call him out for his bad deeds. Also, this house, which was hidden away at the back of his mind, is a mesh of Charlie's fears and his guilt. Based on his facial expressions and his mannerisms, and how he forcefully held Millie, this was all out of fear and guilt for what he did to them that first time and how The Wraith pretty much consumes you. She's literally trying to tell his stupid ass that they can never leave, otherwise, they'll turn to static, which they will. Millie can't go anywhere because she's stuck there and Charlie knows because he was selfish, he robbed her of her future without intending to. Charlie is highkey a yandere, even for his own kid, but it makes sense because he's never really had anything, Also, as to why he’s sort of controlling in a sense: he's driven by fear and also anger if you think about it. Christmasland is how he projects and saving other children because he had a rough and traumatic childhood, he has some serious mental health issues. This I see 100% presented here too, which is a good aspect coming out of this scene. This season does show us a really vulnerable Charlie as they explore his past and give him a breaking point, which we like! But we both definitely agreed that they wanted to make Charlie more of a dick than needed throughout this whole season. Maybe these writers really wanted more drama, especially Manx family drama, through Charlie acting worse? Not so sure. Either way, it gets on my nerves, and it’s almost inconsistent with the narrative they want to spin. They keep going back and forth with “Charlie’s so sad” (which, I would agree, he is, but they even mess that up and somehow still make him look worse) and “Omg he is the worst person ever.” I hope I’ve explained myself well enough in this area, it’s a very complicated and convoluted topic that has me conflicted and annoyed myself.

I think most importantly, the thing that annoys me about all of this Manx family drama the most is: How tf are they gonna “live normal lives” and “escape?” Millie grabbing onto the ornament prevents her from disappearing, which really doesn’t make sense. I’m sure they’ll clarify it next episode, but how is she gonna become a woman and live a normal life? For Christ’s sake, Charlie can barely understand the modern world as an adult man! You think a kid like her is gonna truly enjoy it or understand it? I have my doubts on this and how they’ll write all of that. Plus, she’s a vampire! If she returns human and all the other kids do when their ornaments break, and this is something that confuses me even in the book... where will they go? Oh yeah, they’ll somehow find normal lives! Honestly, it would make more sense to have them move onto the afterlife. Are they gonna keep them human and alive to make them the stars of the show? That possible concept of, “Oh, the kids are gonna be the stars of the show now!” No, writers... just no. Nobody is gonna care about that. Again, it’s a possibility, and it’s a possibility I’m not thrilled by personally. I don’t want them to be the stars. They can be awesome supporting characters, but not the main focus. Idk man, I’m just saying right now, I’m not so sure how this whole concept is gonna work and I fear how they’re going to write it.

Next up: Wayne’s shitty behavior. Wayne is acting like a really big asshole, and it’s getting on my nerves. “He’s now a vampire!” I hear someone say. “Of course he’s acting this way!” Yes, but the reason why it’s especially annoying is because Vic keeps trying and trying to get the point across to him, and it’s all for nothing. We know Vic’s opinions and her heartfelt feelings for her son, and she ends up having to repeat herself when she might as well be taking to the wall. What’s the point? Filler? We already know Vic’s determination is strong. In the book, how Wayne was acting was better. He held onto himself, but he also didn’t, but Vic’s words managed to get across to him quite a few times throughout his journey. This would’ve been much better on screen, but the writer’s were like, “HA HA NOPE!” The scene that really angered me: what was the point of Vic making her speech (which was really nice btw) only for Wayne to not listen... you’d think that’d be the scene where he changes, but the writers decided to turn it into a shock value filler moment (similar to Chris’s death, which, btw, all this nonsense is making his death for near nothing). And, let’s not forget my question from last week.. where is Craig in all of this? Hmmm... guess he decided to take a vacation from helping his biological son, because he’s just gone! Why?! What was the point?! He better at least appear next week, but even then... too late now, buster! Probably should’ve been here earlier! I mean, for real, what was the point of Craig’s character at this point? What a waste of potential...

The worst part imo from this entire episode: Okay, so the writers make Charlie an even worse villain, even giving him those subtle sadistic undertones even as Vic is trying to talk to Wayne (alright, I get it, there’s that element to “saving” Wayne that’s vengeful when it comes to Charlie, but it’s honestly just too much darkness; it’s almost out of character, especially when it’s in a scene like this. I get it, he likes the idea of getting revenge on Vic, but does he have to be THIS dark? That laugh he gave was funny, yes, and I couldn’t help myself but laugh just because of how stupid it sounded, but looking at the reason why he laughed... if anything, he would’ve stood there with a smug smile and say something like, “I told you he loves me more.” They make him way too dark and it really takes away from the fact he is a villain with moral code, but these writers have seemingly forgotten that with the exception of the one scene in episode 7 where he condemns Bing’s rape. Of course, the rapist might be getting a redemption arch anyways, not Charlie, but uh... moving on from all that past shit!). Yeah, as I was saying, they make Charlie darker. Okay, let’s forget my opinions on that for a moment: the characters have the opportunity to make him, this super evil and irredeemable villain, weak to the point he couldn’t get up at all... But Maggie stops him from being in this state? WHAT?! That shit is very out of character for her, and it’s very out of character for Vic to just stop! Vic would’ve persisted, and if the roles were reversed, Charlie would’ve persisted. That’s the thing about them both: they are persistent and protective about their kids. Why did Vic need to stop? “We need to find your son!” MAGGIE! You’ve both tried multiple times already! Focus on Charlie when you have the chance! How stupid are you two?! And better yet: Why would Vic drop the weapon?! She would’ve grabbed it!!!! What the hell is this shit?! I can’t even express how stupid this is... I get you can’t exactly kill him, but you could make absolute certain he would be subdued and unable to even have the chance to get up and grab his weapon. But nope! They need to attempt for the thousandth time to save Wayne in the exact same way, when it has shown not to work. You’d think they’d at least attempt to think of something else, even if their options are limited, but nah, we’re gonna do something very out of character instead... why?

Things aren’t looking too good for Maggie, so I have to ask: is Maggie gonna die? And if so, that is beyond fucking stupid. They set up the potential for a plot with Tabs and Mags for the third season. I didn’t pick up that they officially broke up, rather just separated for now, and... for what?! If she’s seriously gonna die, I’m gonna be extremely pissed. That wasted potential and insult to her character would be so fucking stupid. Yes, she dies in the book (in a different fashion, and it’s probably not that great how she goes there either), but look at all they’ve done for her character, especially giving her a girlfriend, a character that’s become even more important. Her death would be questionably more insulting here for sure!

Overall, while there were things I liked about this episode, I am majorly disappointed and concerned for the future of the series. I’m afraid it will take directions that are not good, and if it does continue, I am afraid it will be a living dead show of sorts. I think the only true way this show can carry on and be good is if all our main most important characters (Vic, Maggie, Charlie, Lou, Wayne, and Tabs) are all alive. Now, Vic and Charlie might be the only exception to this, just because they both do die in the book, and although even that is rough and not the best, it is expectant and I think this show can still be good with Maggie, Lou, Tabitha, and Linda taking care of Wayne (I’m not gonna go into the potential with Millie in this scenario because that’s a rocky topic lol). But if this show follows the path of TWD, where we have a whole new cast of characters you’re not really gonna care about and all the old cast you got to know and love is just gone... that’ll be the cherry on top of this shit sundae. I am excited for the concept of exploring the world of other Strong Creatives, as many rumors speculate the next season will contain, but if the show that explored the world of zombies failed by getting rid of pretty much their whole old cast... what about this show? They’ve already messed up quite a few things I don’t like this season I’ve discussed before, and if they go the route of doing anything that can get worse... I can’t describe how disappointing it would be. Not saying things have to be perfect or my way all the way, but it has to be generally good and enjoyable for everyone. Growing attached to a cast of characters only to erase many of them and focus on a new one is not a way that is good and enjoyable for everyone. AMC: This happened with TWD; for the love of God, don’t let it happen with NOS4A2.

As I said in my last review: let’s hope next week is better, and AMC, for the second time in a row, doesn’t deliver a disappointment of a show.

#nos4a2 #nos4a2 vic #nos4a2 charlie #nos4a2 maggie #maggie leigh #charlie manx #vic mcqueen

[war--lords]

Consider this: Magnet, but it going both ways with MC and her suitor. Everyone is staring at these pair of hot damn 'are they models or something someone catch me as I swoon' but they're both so 'secretly-in-love-with-each-other-but-everyone-can-see-it-so-what's-the-truth' that they never realize it? Fangirls and fanboys are instantly turned away because damn how could you even think to contest with MC/Suitor? THEY'RE NOT OFFICIAL BUT DAMNIT SOMEONE MAKE THESE TWO KISS ALREADY--

Okay so brownie points to you, anon, because this is the exact scenario I pictured when I put Magnet on the trope list.

(This turned out differently but I hope you can still enjoy it!)

Masamune x Fem!Reader

High School AU

A knock on the door interrupts you while you read yet another error-riddled report, a job far too annoying to be dealt with in the early morning before homeroom.

“Come in,” you call, fiddling with your pen.

“Senpai,” a scrawny young man enters the room with a look on his face that can only be interpreted as guilty, “I’m so sorry I’m late, I wasn’t aware that—”

You stand up from your seat, ushering him to come in as he stumbles upon his words. You close the door as you listen, picking up stuff like “first day” and “sophomore” and, a popular one, “sorry”. Gesturing to a desk on the left of yours, facing the other side of the room, you fix him a cup of water from the drinks station.

“Calm down,” you say as soon as it’s clear that he has no plans of stopping. “You’re not late, you’re early.”

That seems to stun him. You offer him the cup, which just slips into his hands like he’s not fully aware of it. He’s no longer catching his breath.

“—but you’re already here?”

“I come early on days when there’s a lot of work—it’s been a couple of weeks since the start of the new school year, which means there’s always something for me to do.”

“I see,” he answers, still sounding far-away.

“Did you eat breakfast?”

“Y-Yes, uh, I’m sorry for bursting in like that!”

“It’s okay. Your name?”

“Sasaki! Sasaki Fumio. I’m the new council member—the Vice President was the one who recruited me.”

“Ranmaru did?” You nod receptively. “I must’ve been unavailable at the time. Well, make yourself comfortable. The previous treasurer is going to be here anytime soon for the handover.”

“Thank you, kaichou!” Sasaki bows deeply, and you shoot him a symphatetic smile, somehow hoping that he’ll catch your unspoken message: you don’t have to be so formal.

As the sophomore familiarizes himself with his new workspace, you return to the report you were reading, struggling to figure out where you left off. At the back of your mind you wonder why the student council’s office in this academy is at least half of the size of its faculty office.

Then you glance at the mountain of folders to your right—ah.

That’s because there’s so much work for you to do.

♥️ ♥️ ♥️ ♥️ ♥️ 

Ranmaru might appear as a soft, effeminate boy that laughs at all your jokes, but he can be quite ruthless while doing his job. Right now he’s barraging you with a series of requests from the student body.

“The tea ceremony club asks for your permission to employ a mascot for their recruitment drive.”

“In what form and how big?” You try not to scrunch your eyebrows at the possibilities in the answers, minding your steps as you walk through the hallway from the council office to this crime scene Ranmaru is supposed to brief you.

“Tea bowl,” there’s an unsure pause as Ranmaru matches his pace to yours, walking beside you but looking straight ahead, “…big.”

“Give them the go ahead but restrict their movements to outside the school building.”

“Morning, kaichou!”

“Morning!” You reply back to whoever it was, but never stopping in your tracks, leaving behind a trail of giggles from a bunch of students.

“There’s dispute between the male and female volleyball teams about practice grounds that they’d like you to mediate.”

“What about the faculty advisor?”

“Nakajima-sensei is on paternity leave and won’t be back anytime soon.”

“Good for him, but I think we need to check if the club needs a sub for that. But I’ll mediate.”

“I’ll let them know.”

“Also, don’t you think it would be fun if they can just play against each other to settle the debate?”

Ranmaru laughs—he always has a way to make you feel good about yourself without being dishonest in the very least. “That way we can attract an audience to come and watch.”

“And we sell the tickets?”

“It’ll be nice to have more money for our own recruitment drive,” Ranmaru shrugs, playing along. The two of you arrive just outside the shoe lockers by the school entrance, and in front of you is a sea of students, walking your way, trying to get to class. 

“Why is it so crowded here?”

Ranmaru points ahead to the source—a recruitment drive right in the middle of the paved path leading towards the building. There’s a makeshift booth and a queueing crowd. You can’t tell from which club. The only way is to move closer.

Ranmaru leads you towards the front where you can see a sign. Once you’re on the other side of it, you see that it reads

A hug and a kiss for new members! ♥️

“It’s home ec,” Ranmaru supplies, sheepishly tucking a strand of hair behind his ear. He studies your face as you sigh.

“It’s always home ec.”

You dread the steps you need to take to get to the point of the problem, even with your extremely capable second-in-command having your back. The truth is that the home economics club president has a way of addressing you in ways that make you forget yourself and the responsibilities of your position.

Though it might be true that at the end of the day you both are nobody but regular people, you’d rather not venture into the dangerous things he might rope you in.

“Always the crowd-pleaser, aren’t we, Date-kun?”

The tall form standing in front of the booth takes notice of you, his good eye immediately zeroing in on you.

“If it isn’t our very own student council president,” he says lightheartedly. “Did you finally decide to join home ec?” 

“Unfortunately no,” you say, shrugging. There’s nothing particularly cold or passive-aggressive about your exchange with Date Masamune—it’s almost routine. Dare you say, though, it’s almost… fun.

“Too bad. There’s no next year, you know, because we’re graduating and all.”

“Why are you selling your body for the love of strangers, Date-kun?”

He barks out a laugh, head thrown back and hand cupped against his mouth to muffle the sound. The other home ec members are laughing, too. Clearly he’s taken aback. He sighs, wiping a tear from the corner of his eye, while you and Ranmaru look on, amused.

“Sorry, I certainly didn’t see that coming,” he says, calming down. “But hey, the more the merrier, right? Aren’t you proud of seeing the academy hosting such a popular club?”

“I would, if only the circumstances aren’t as seedy as this,” you sigh, once again inspecting the a hug and a kiss sign, painted in scandalous hot pink. Not appropriate for extracurricular activity. The queue now looks absolutely embarrassed, the many girls visibly squirming, covering their faces, while the boys feigns interest in the beautiful blue sky above.

“Why even go this far?”

“Well, you know how I’m never satisfied no matter how successful the club has become?” He grins. “That’s why.”

“I doubt you’ll successfully obtain quality leads this way. They’re primary interest is certainly not your cooking courses.”

Something dangerous flashes in his eyes and you automatically feel a physical response: your feet, planted firmer on the ground as if scared that he’s going to sweep you away. A foolish fear, you note, but one that’s entirely possible. There’s no telling what he’s going to do next. You’re made aware of the heart beating in your chest.

“Oh-ho,” he smirks, and circles you once, like a predator around prey. “What are you suggesting, kaichou? That the home ec club is a secret sex den?”

He whispers the last part only for your ears to hear, but even without knowing his exact words Ranmaru reacts, taking a step forward. You stop him with a look. You can handle this.

“You’re not even blushing,” Masamune says, almost in disdain, but now he’s a little close, peering into your face, searching. From your peripheral you see the crowd finally dispersing, not wanting to be caught up in trouble.

“That’s because I’m considering it a possibility.”

He laughs again, softer this time. There’s a smoldering heat rolling off of him, whether it’s his presence or his actual body heat, you can’t tell, but you’re definitely feeling it. You acknowledge this uncomfortable tension, but force away the thought that it might be sexually charged. Of course, Date Masamune is one of the most popular and attractive students in the academy. But that’s that—it’s natural for people to be physically attracted to others. Nothing more.

Right?

“You just lost me a lot of members,” he says, not even looking around him. He keeps staring at you.

“For good reason. Your tactics can be reported to the faculty as indecency and the principal will definitely be involved,” you’re not actually definitely sure about the principal bit, they could always just let him off with a warning since he’s quite a star student in his own way, but no mind. The truth isn’t always a good weapon for intimidation.

“It’s all completely consensual.”

“I understand that part,” you rebuke, sounding harsher than before. Of course it’s consensual—they have full liberty, partaking in the queue. “Consensual doesn’t mean appropriate for school grounds. At least not in our culture.”

He ruffles his hair. He hates the feeling he gets when you scold him for real, as if you’re disappointed in him somehow.

“I want you to know that it’s all in good fun.”

“I’m sure it is,” you soften a little. He’s a boy on the cusp of being a young adult. You understand because you’re just as human. “I’m merely doing my job. And part of my job here is to tell you what to do next.”

He lets out a dejected sigh. “Fire away, ma’am.”

You shoot him a glare at the nickname.

“The home economics club recruitment drive is to be put on hold under the direction of the student council until you’ve submitted a new recruitment drive plan that does not involve hugging or kissing new members, even at their own discretion—and once that’s done, you need to stick to that plan. No more improvisations in the name of good fun.”

“Okay,” he shrugs.

“I’ll even accept the same plan as you’ve previously submitted.”

“Yeah.”

“You better pray that all the chatter about your fun booth doesn’t reach the faculty. If that happens, it’s out of my hands. You do know this, right?”

“Yeah.”

It’s your turn to sigh now, a mix of fatigue and relief. “Plan by the end of today, on my desk. I’ll wait for you.”

“Okay.” I’ll wait for you. Coming from you, that sounds especially nice, he thinks.

“You better stop fooling around, Date-kun. You said it yourself—we’re graduating next year. I’m just saying maybe it’s time for you to take it more seriously.”

There’s something about the way you said it: as solemn as it is severe, that inevitably shakes the one-eyed boy in his core. Out of all his head-butting with you, you’ve never sounded this serious.

He just hopes it isn’t disappointment in your eyes.

You turn around, walking back to the building with Ranmaru following suit, leaving Masamune and a handful of other home ec members standing around the walkway, their booth abandoned and prospective members gone. 

 ♥️ ♥️ ♥️ ♥️ ♥️

“Whoa—”

He opens the door to the student council office, only to find you standing right beyond it, ready to head out. You look as startled as he is, taking a few staggered steps back to avoid collision.

“You okay?” He asks.

“Yes,” you answer. “I thought you weren’t going to show up.” Again, there’s that discomfort in Masamune’s gut at the thought of you leaving. Did he seem like a person to go against his word like that, just letting you wait for the whole day for something that’s not going to arrive?

The orange sky lights up the room, burning it with orange hues of the sunset. He watches as your silhouette walks back to your desk, the sun stabbing shadows of you on the floor. He follows you and hands you the report. You opt to not take a seat, standing in front of him as you read through the two-pager.

“Looks good,” you say after a few moments. “The same as before.”

“Didn’t want to put my secretary’s work to waste.”

“Wise choice,” you say, offering him a smile as you leave the report on your desk. “Let’s go home. It’s going to be dark soon.”

And as he walks behind you, watching your back as you cross the room, something turns in his mind. There’s a sense of urgency, the kind that he’s not constantly chasing, the kind that is too important to miss. So before you have the chance to reach for the doorknob and walk away, he tugs at your wrist to stop you.

For you, it’s a quick succession of blurred actions, and you find your back pressed against the wall. He’s right in front of you, the tips of his indoor slippers touching yours, and you can feel his breath on your skin. Yours is caught in your throat at the sight of his arresting eye, staring at you with formidable intensity. He’s so close.

Your lips open, and you think you’re going to say something, but your voice fails you.

“You know that thing you told me earlier?” His voice is a rasp, low and secretive, even though it’s just the two of you in a room lit by a setting sun. He senses your silent question.

“You told me that maybe it’s time for me to take things seriously.”

You can’t bring yourself to reply—your wit abandons you, and you fear that any attempt to speak is not going to work. Your throat and lips feel dry.

“I guess what I’m trying to say is,” he slips his arm around your waist, “that there’s one thing I haven’t taken seriously.” His grip is the right amount of firm and gentle. Heat creeps up your cheek, and you’d blame it on the glaring orange sun, but he’s too smart for that.

His other hand very cautiously reaches out for your face, and when they make contact you somehow fight the urge to lean your weight against his touch. You know this feeling, but you dare not give a name to it.

“The way you looked at me this morning makes me think that you think I’m a mistake.” He sees you visibly surprised at that. “I want to prove to you that I’m not.”

You gasp when he presses his body against you, the warm concrete wall behind you letting you feel your own pulse. His nose touches yours and your lips are but an inch apart. He’s waiting.

“I’m,” you swallow, voice slightly cracking, “I’ve been… considering the possibilities.”

You see his eyes light up.   

“And it wasn’t my intention. Earlier, I mean. To make you feel like I’m disappointed in you. It—It’s just something I blurted out.”

His arm around your waist settles you in his grip. He’s getting impatient.

“Let me prove it anyways.”

You can only nod.

He sighs, moving to your jaw to plant a preemptive kiss on your skin, and you shudder when he whispers against it.

“I never noticed how badly I wanted to kiss you.”

Then, with precision and ease, he tilts his head, pressing his lips against your slightly open ones in a deep kiss that knocks your breath away. You instinctively grab his uniform shirt for solace, not trusting that your knees are able to support you. But he’s so snug against you there’s no way you’re going to fall—he’s pursuing you, kiss after kiss, the exchange a series of giving and receiving. You let out a sigh of his name—Masamune, not the usual “Date-kun”—and he feels like he’s losing his mind. His other hand now ventures to the back of your head, pulling you impossibly closer to him. You take turns nipping and tugging at each other’s lips, yours more coquettish to his boldness. 

“Ngh, ah,” you moan as he slips his tongue in your mouth, just as you think it’s not going to feel any better. There’s a warmth between your legs, one that he anticipates and encourages, because he has his knee there, letting you rest against it. You feel pleasurably faint.

He lets out a guttural noise when he pulls his lips away from yours, as if reluctant to trade the taste of you for air. You hear your heartbeat pounding in your ears and his heavy breaths mingled in with yours.

He catches you licking your lips, now rosy, glistening, and absolutely swollen, and it’s like he crumbles all over again.

“One more,” he sighs, “do you allow it?”

“Yes,” you reply as breathless as he, and he wastes no time kissing you. His lips are noticably more gentle, his tongue taking the time to map you out, his teeth dragging slowly across your lips leisurely. You’re melting against him, powerless against his wiles, and he welcomes it, letting you grip his collar to bring him closer. 

He breathes your name against your mouth and you let out a small whimper—it sounds like music to your ears in a way that you don’t know you needed.

In the waning sunlight, the two of you share one, two, three more kisses in an empty student council office, with him boldly venturing new grounds: your jaw and throat, the skin underneath your school uniform. His knee between your legs, the sensation that he leaves after pulling away from what surely will become a love bite. By the end of it, the two of you are disheveled and the sky is half-indigo. For a moment, nobody says a thing for fear of breaking the spell.

“Let me walk you home,” he finally says, and you’re delighted to find that the spell isn’t broken.

#masamune #masamune x reader #au #reader insert #Female reader #imagine #scenario #imagines #ikemen sengoku #ikesen #cybird #date masamune #Darling Anon #1.5k

[meta-squash]

Brick Club 1.3.7 “The Wisdom Of Tholomyes”

Oh my god there’s so much in this chapter, I’m so sorry for how long this is.

It’s probably just me, but this speech, or at least the beginning of it, reminds me of the way Shakespeare tends to write characters that are obnoxiously lecturing other characters (Polonius in particular comes to mind for some reason).

Tholomyes drunkenly stands up and tells everyone to slow down, to both eat and talk more slowly. But two chapters ago Hugo said they had finished eating. Go home, Tholomyes, you’re drunk. Tholomyes compares Talleyrand and Grimod de la Reyniere, one was a connoisseur of wine, the other of food, which is probably a “these people say savor your meals” statement.

Everyone else wants him to shut the hell up so they can continue their conversations and/or singing, which is funny. Also, I see so much Grantaire in this entire speech. Only, instead of a “down with your claws” remark going ignored, Tholomyes’ “You are it’s marquis” pun makes everyone quiet down, which he obviously takes as an invitation. 

Tholomyes first segment about puns absolutely sounds like Hugo being extremely self-aware. He has an unlikable character criticize and disparage the excess use of puns, fully knowing the amount of puns that will be used later on in this book. Hugo mentions irony in conjunction with Tholomyes in 1.3.2, here he’s really displaying it.

According to wikipedia, the Jesus/Peter pun is due to a Greek translation, where “Peter” is translated to “Petros” and then the same sentence also contains the word “petra” (rock), so that Jesus is saying “Thou art Rock, and upon this rock will I build my church.” The Polynices pun is from Aeschylus’ play Seven Against Thebes. At one point the play’s chorus describes Polynices and his brother Eteocles as being “true to each other’s names, both truly lamentable (eteokleitoi) and both full of strife (polyneikeis).” The Cleopatra pun is basically Cleopatra mocking Antony, who is upset that Caesar is late to battle, calling Caesar’s tardiness harmless. The “prudence of Amphiaraus” is also a pun, since Amphiaraus was a Greek king and seer who continuously did things knowing they’d go wrong or fail. The “baldness of Caesar” pun is a play on words because “Caesar” means “hairy child” and Caesar himself was balding.

I’ve just realized that the “Est modus in rebus” (Moderation in all things) line is what reminds me of Polonius. I can’t help but think of his “neither a borrower nor a lender be” lecture towards Laertes.

Tholomyes suddenly gets a little more ominous and foreshadowing as he talks about how love should not be overloaded, and there must be restraint and ends to things, even love. “The wise man is he who knows when and how to stop. Have some confidence in me.” I love this for a few reasons. First, Tholomyes is pretty drunk here, and he’s the one calling for moderation in all things. Ha! Second, it’s funny that he’s telling people to have confidence in him when they all seem to want him to be quiet. Third, he��s got an interesting way of interpreting “how to stop.”

Which is actually a line that’s interesting to me. Previously I kind of thought this cruel prank was a thing he’d done to women many times before, with other friends. Except this “the wise man is he who knows when and how to stop” line sounds like he’s talking about trying to extricate himself from this whole situation. Maybe he’s never knocked up a grisette before; certainly he’s probably never had one actually fall in love with him before, since usually everyone’s on the same page. He wants out of this relationship that’s more than he signed up for. It’s definitely time to stop, and this is apparently the only “how” he knows?

Sylla was the first republican to seize power via military coup; but at the end of his dictatorship, when he had imposed all the changes he wanted, he abdicated and retired. I don’t understand the Origenes line, but I think that’s due to my cluelessness when it comes to the way different areas of Christianity work.

He pronounces “friends” in a few different languages, which I can only imagine as being very slurred and with sloppy, ridiculous gestures. He waxes poetic (or something) about how to have no passion or love. I can’t tell if he’s talking about having an affair without falling into marriage/love, or feeling nothing at all. In the next lines he certainly seems annoyed with himself for getting mixed up with someone who has actual feelings for him.

Here’s more shades of Grantaire. Tholomyes has this whole rant on each country’s measurements; Grantaire has his rant on each country’s popular trade. But Grantaire’s is a political and social critique, while I think Tholomyes’ might be a dick joke?

Tholomyes isn’t even subtle about his affair with Favourite here. He straight up insults Zephine and calls her ugly, I think he insinuates that Dahlia is boring, and then he basically dismisses Fantine and calls her an airhead. And in the middle of this he sings Favourite’s praises. He specifically calls attention to her mouth. Also, he refers to her with “tu” instead of “vous,” the first time he uses the familiar with her, at least with company around.

God, he talks about Fantine like she’s not even there. What an asshole. I hate him so much. He talks about Fantine like she’s not there, and she doesn’t do or say anything to contradict that. Again, she gets no dialogue in this chapter. Where is Fantine at, mentally, in all of this? Because Hugo does this a lot: he’ll describe someone or something in idealized tones, and then a chapter or two later a character will have dialogue describing that same person/thing, but in much more down-to-earth ways. Fantine and Cosette are both described in conjunction with birds. Only, Cosette is a bird, and Fantine is staring off into space, imagining birds. Honestly if we’re still going about this with the headcanon that she’s on the spectrum (which I am, I love it), this sounds like an overstimulation shut down. Hell, my adhd brain does the same thing when I’m in places that are really loud and busy and there’s not really a point of focus. If everyone around them is yelling and laughing and singing as much as they are, then it’s probably horrific in this pub.

Tholomyes is so blatant here about his intentions around Fantine. “I am an illusion--but she doesn’t not even hear me...” I think this piece of dialogue is twofold. Tholomyes is again hinting at his plan to leave, to end everything; his relationship with Fantine is so fake as to be an illusion. But it’s also here to describe Fantine, who is dreaming up a relationship that doesn’t exist. I kind of get the feeling that Tholomyes hasn’t been very nice to Fantine for a while, hasn’t been trying to keep up the pretense of this relationship, and yet Fantine is so wrapped up in her own personal illusion that they’re in love that she is unable to notice or see his assholery.

Yet another shade of Grantaire here. This monologue describing Fantine made me think of R’s “Chowder is ugly” monologue. Tholomyes describes Fantine as the “daughter of chimeras” while Chowder is a chimera. They both get classical allusions: Fantine is a nymph, while Chowder is a gargoyle instead of Galatea. Chowder gets hair like lead, while Fantine is a jewel. Both men are drunkenly harassing women and being real obnoxious about it. The difference is a) Chowder is probably used to it as waitress and Grantaire doesn’t seem to mean genuine harm and b) Tholomyes is “in a relationship” with Fantine, and that’s no way to treat someone, and it definitely sounds like he’s mocking her in front of her face to other people.

The “too much sugar” rant goes with the marriage one, I think. According to Tholomyes, women are too obsessed with the fairytale-type nice things, spend too much time imagining sweetness like a wedding. I’m not sure how popular trash romances were at the time (I know Hugo mentions that Mme. Thenardier reads them) but I wonder if he’s referencing reading those as well.

“Make conquests. Rob each other without remorse of your beloved. Crisscross and double cross. In love, there are no friends. Wherever there’s a pretty woman, there’s open warfare....” You know what, I think Tholomyes actually really wants Fantine to figure it out. At first I thought he was being an annoying asshole and acting like this because he knows she doesn’t get it so he doesn’t care. But I actually think he wants to see her put it together. He’s still talking in metaphors and references, but I think he wants Fantine to realize that he’s cheating, that he doesn’t love her back and this is just a fling. He wants her to be on the same level as everyone else. I don’t know if he wants it so that there’s a better chance of them getting away without consequences, or if he’s a cruel bastard (he is) who wants to watch her world collapse. He’s been saying it louder and louder and more and more obviously as the speech goes on. But as he says just a paragraph before, Fantine just doesn’t get it. Either she truly doesn’t notice, or she refuses to see. He describes her as so distant here, I think she truly doesn’t notice or get it.

This is also a bunch of references to women who were historically raped. He basically seems to be saying that when you refuse to settle down, you get the “benefit” of being the enemy and taking other people’s partners. Gross. Hugo really knows how to write a slimy, unlikable asshole. And even his friends seem to think he’s going to far, because they tell him to stop talking, and when it seems like he’s going to start up again, they sing some annoying rhyming song. Why they thought that would shut him up, I don’t know.

He really does spend this whole speech dropping hints. “Let’s finish our course of study with folly and food” sounds like he’s talking about messing around with the women, but also definitely sounds like a hidden “ooh, you’re about to get tricked and feel so stupid.”

He spouts off a bunch more springtime allusions (comparing nightingales to the opera singer Jean Elleviou, Jardin du Luxembourg, pastorals about various upper-class streets, etc.) The pampas line is interesting. Pampas are big open fertile lowlands in South America, as compared to the covered arcades of the Odeon theatre. Again I think this is a twofold joke: on the one hand, literally the Pampas is a place Tholomyes could go and become a landowner and be a rich independent colonizer, but he feels he does perfectly fine shmoozing at the the theatre in Paris. Less literally, this could also be a sex joke, similar to Grantaire’s “if only I wanted to,” only worse. Basically he’s saying “look at all these girls I could go fuck in other places, but I get enough tail in the theatres of Paris.” Gross.

He then kisses Favourite “by mistake.” I think at this point he knows Fantine is never going to get it. But Favourite is clearly in on the joke. He doesn’t even care anymore, he’ll cheat on Fantine in front of all of them because they all kind of know except Fantine--who isn’t going to figure it out, obviously.

#les miserables #les miserables meta #brickclub #lm 1.3.7 #les mis #les mis meta #y'all have no idea how much fun i have researching the references #even though sometimes i don't know enough about french history to really dig deep

[bladekindeyewear]

Book Commentary on Inversion Theory

Alright, as a follow-up to this post, it looks like there’s an actual full bit of Homestuck book commentary (around the pages nearing Rose’s grimdark transformation, Book 6 pg 115, HS pg 3305, thanks @ramiedersedreamer and @zandraxofnebulon) about how Inversion Theory (1, 2, 3, 4, 5) isn’t what we thought.  Quoting and reading it first (not the whole reddit post but that portion at least), then discussion under the cut:

"Rose is a Light player, but her blackout effects result from arguably the nadir of her role as such a hero--that is, when she succumbs to Scratch's manipulations and other eldritch persuasions, and goes grimdark. This truth would appear to lend credence to a line of classpect thinking known as "inversion theory," which really isn't without its merits. This note has just gone to the bother of describing one of its merits, in fact. However, it is possible to get carried away with this line of thinking and use it to evaluate everything that happens in Homestuck. For instance, you could say "Well, Karkat is a Blood hero, and here's where he stops being as Karkatty as usual, so that means he's being the opposite of his aspect. Which means he's being Breathy instead of Bloody. So that means a bunch of other stuff, ipso facto, Homestuck has been EXPLAINED." That's not really the way all this works. Aspect lore runs deep, but it isn't the Rosetta Stone to the story. When in doubt, it's better to remember this: rather than an underlying mystical logic where all classpect roads lead to Deep Answers, HS is a comprehensive nexus of many themes, and all roads lead to the basic idea that this is a tale about kids who are trapped in the universal struggle associated with growing up."

I... hm.  Dammit.  Is that all he wrote??  This slippery author is a master of giving us tantalizing and insightful details without committing to any hard yes-or-no whatsoever.  >:T

I’d been building myself up to reading this all throughout yesterday with gut-wrenching dread that at this late, late, late hour he’d finally given us a definitive “NO” on Inversion.  Instead we get this quite interesting but more vague “eh, there’s merits, but don’t go too far with it”.  Which is...... 

...about as potentially-optimistic as I put it in the previous post, if not moreso?

Andrew’s being careful to lavish odd praise on inversion theory, too.  Which some people are going to interpret as (Option 1) “Nice try, but dead wrong”, like the anon who put a snippet in my inbox initially, and others will interpret as (Option 2) “The big ones are RIGHT, nudge nudge, but stop applying it everywhere cause the fans who say every line of the comic means ‘ghosting inversion’ are looking at the story wrong and annoying everyone”.

As someone guilty of being one of those fans described in the latter half on occasion, I can CERTAINLY agree with THAT last part.  Andrew made it really clear with the ending of Homestuck proper -- “this side shit didn’t matter as much as you thought it did”.  I was so enamored with the classpect system that I thought almost everything was being shown to us through those lenses, at one point -- but even though perhaps more than the random reader might have thought is there, like he says, it ain’t supposed to be no Rosetta Stone.  Even when I WAS overapplying classpect everywhere, the people who did it too often in places I felt clearly un-merited REALLY pissed me off!  I can’t imagine how much more that might’ve been magnified in the shoes of someone who happened to apply the correct, lower amount of classpect and had to put up with me babbling and slathering it everywhere, much less the author’s shoes.

But there is still a big hole in his criticism, one he intentionally seems to have left there to me.  By saying “don’t look for it everywhere”, but ALSO that “there’s more than some merit to it”... I don’t think it’s a stretch to think the truth might not only be somewhere in between Options 1 and 2, but perhaps even closer to Option 2.

Aaaand HERE’s where if you’re someone who HUNGERED for me to admit wrongdoing by sticking with this theory for so long, you’re no doubt angry.  Looking at me as making excuses in the face of this long-awaited OBJECTIVE PROOF OF TOTAL THEORY DISMISSAL... WHY won’t the deluded bastard FINALLY succumb to REASON?  ANDREW HIMSELF spoke up on the issue, IS THIS NOT ENOUGH?!???

And, well... you’re right to be angry.  To be honest, I’m a fair bit pissed off too -- I could’ve used a solid “NO”, traumatizing as it would’ve been to me!

But that’s not what we got, because... *rolls eyes @ author* ...that’s not how Andrew works nowadays.  And as irritating as it is, I also have to respect it a bit.

Andrew has become pretty committed to not full-on table-flipping fan interpretations and fanworks, avoiding forcing one “correct” interpretation (see: central struggle of HS^2 and the villains labeling divergence from canon at all as “bad”) because both interpretations should be rewarded.  If something is REALLY wrong and hurts objective appreciation of the lessons he wanted to portray in his comic, like people plastering Classpect everywhere to the exclusion of the story’s central canon-escaping themes, he’s willing to shut them down... but when it comes to effective-sounding interpretations of the comic that he possibly never intended but “could” have been what he intended?  He’s REALLY careful not to step on them!  Or even sometimes DISTINGUISH them from the ones that he DID intend, sometimes, to keep as many fan interpretations alive in our imaginations as possible.

Which, as someone who pins Inversion’s entire existence on the assertion that “Andrew deliberately intended this and it’s our DELUSION otherwise”, really pisses me off at times like this.  This is a theory hinged on the idea that Andrew had been deliberately hiding INCREDIBLY clever evidence throughout the comic for these intense thematic moves.  All the SYMBOLISM we thought was pointing to inversion would lose an incredible amount of its meaning if it were all an accident.  What about all that cool imagery in the Breath and Blood post?  Did any of THAT really mean what we thought it was there for, like between WV and PM?  Was any of it REAL?  Will we ever even get an ANSWER?  The answer is “no, we won’t”, because Andrew persists in this method of keeping his cards close to his chest even if he has to take them to the damn grave, cause he knows we’ll have more “fun” not knowing ‘em.  That considerate son of a bitch.  >:(

I’m serious -- it really does make me more than a little angry.  I really do wish he’d said more to show us where we’re off-course.

But HS^2 has brought us Terezi telling us that Mind and Heart are indeed opposites.  He MIGHT be holding onto the info because we may get it later in canon itself...

Meh.  I’ll try not to hope too hard.  And I’d better clarify what I actually believe, here:

My TL;DR thoughts on Andrew’s commentary up above are that when it comes to Inversion Theory (1, 2, 3, 4, 5), he’s leaving room for some of the BIG events to have been right or almost right -- say, #1, maybe #2, and only POSSIBLY #3 or #4 -- while telling us to back off and cast SERIOUS DOUBT on stuff that could have more character-driven explanations, especially #5.

If there’s a seriously FUNDAMENTAL transformation in a character that isn’t fully explained by their character journey alone (as kids growing up), involves significant outside interference, and is reflected by countless visual cues, THEN we should want to see if Inversion Theory “has merit” in that sort of case -- while laying it up against other competing theories that account for external interference of a non-Inversion-related nature in their actions too.  Things like pre- and post-ascension Aradia or pre- and post-dreamdeath Jade seeming almost completely different characters?  Or Rose seemingly taken over by the Horrorterrors... only to do nothing to benefit them but throw her mainself at Jack and get killed so she’d be forced to ascend on the moon mission rather than God-tier-die?  I’d say Inversion is worth consideration and -- daresay -- worth believing in, in such cases.

And it still might all be wrong.  There are legitimate ways to read Andrew’s commentary above that would have people screaming that Inversion has been disproven, that the “merits” mentioned were just a nod of respect to the losing side that I’m completely overblowing.  But those seem to me like carefully ambiguous words from a carefully ambiguous man, and if there’s anyone to blame for their ambiguity, it’s Andrew.  Trust me; I don’t like it either.  He’s had plenty of practice saying things in a way that we CAN’T really draw many assumptions from.

Heck, even the Redditor transcribing this summarized their thoughts in a way that draws some assumptions I don’t believe are there:

Mostly I think it's just interesting that he's actually addressing Inversion Theory, and the gist is basically "it's a cool idea and has some merits, but the classpect system and story are not quite that formulaic." Sorry BKEW. At least we know Hussie has been paying attention to our wild theorizing.

--which is a rebuke drawn on the common interpretation that Inversion describes too “formulaic” a classpect system, especially with specific-class inversion like Seer <-> Witch and such.  But IS that what Andrew is saying? Andrew criticizes the overapplication of aspect theory in describing everyone’s actions page to page, but does that mean a quote-unquote “rigid” system (I’m not going to play out the old “specific-class-inversion-is-too-rigid” vs “youre missing the flexible potential a fixed system gives” arguments again) is ITSELF an overapplication of classpect to people’s actions and personalities? Is he perhaps hinting that only Aspect stuff mattered in Inversion cases and the Witchy Rose class stuff was just a separate thematic thing that fits by coincidence??  What does it mean? WE DON’T KNOW!  AND IT’S PISSING ME OFF AAAARGH

...I think I’ve said all I can think to say for now.

I mean, I’m glad Inversion Theory wasn’t outright disproven.  I think it’s neat.  I have a lot of emotional investment behind it, and being told it was all a worthless goose chase would have made me vomitously sick!  But as I struggled with at the end of Homestuck proper, constant ambiguity shows a fair bit of disregard of its own, and both ending AND epiloguing Homestuck not only without a “yes” on this but without even a clear “NO” has caused me more gutache and poor feelings across MONTHS than either answer ever would have given me.  I thought we’d earned that by getting through it, that we wouldn’t have to wait for YEARS and then STILL get cockteased like this.  And I wonder how much I’m going to regret, later, that this wasn’t just a clear, simple “NO”.

I’m being told there’s an upd8 just now and I should read it.  I’ll get on that.  Cy’all.

#Homestuck #Homestuck Liveblog #Homestuck Commentary #Aspect Duality #Theory Policy #Andrew Hussie #Breath and Blood #hs2 #Homestuck^2 #bladekindeyewear #blastyoboots