#bc he needed someone to just. sit. and be there. while he’s processed emotions

[padfootastic]

please say more about jilypad + diverging parenting styles... perhaps even a possible scenario >:) i imagine harry has very cunning tactics for using this to his advantage

helloooooo <3 thank u for this ask bc i love talking about these three and harry. i went looking thru the archives to find this post; my first foray into this side, and really, i’ve never looked back after that.

so i’ve talked ab this a bit before but i fully think that james was a very overprotective ‘mother hen’ type parent. i tend to read his behaviour in lily’s bday letter to sirius as being scared of his child on a broomstick and i fully, fully think he’ll never be able to let go of that as harry grows up. he’ll be anxious and suspicious and paranoid, and his first instant will always be to wrap harry up in cotton wool and hide him away. (i low-key connect this to his childhood as well; going from being spoiled and sheltered to dropped in the middle of a war, black & white thinking, living in extremes etc etc makes it v hard for him to be Normal about his child. as he shouldn’t be, really, but yeah) that’s why he thrives during the initial years; he never minds the hard parts of being a new parent, loves it in fact, and it makes it better that he can keep harry close to him at all times w/o coming off as a helicopter parent (not that the notion bothers him ofc).

it’s good, then, that he has two partners to even the scales, no? i think lily was the most…balanced out of the three. she had a relatively normal childhood, grew up in a working class family/neighbourhood and had to deal w adversity from a young age so she’s developed a nice, thick skin. she also has a sibling with whom she has a v rocky relationship so she knows that kids are, ykno, a bit unhinged. and a little bit of hardship is not a problem. i hc her as needing time to get used to parenthood, unlike james who stepped into it natural as breathing, or even sirius who loved harry on much on first sight that it made up for everything else. ofc lily loved her son, but it didn’t come w the same blinding intensity of her partners and made her feel really shitty in the beginning. but, i think she’d shine during his teen years actually, because she’s not overbearing or intense and becomes the quiet, calm strength that a hormonal, spotty teen boy would probably need.

and sirius <3 our poor baby falls in love with harry, perhaps even more quickly than james, with such startling speed that it shakes his entire foundation. he doesn’t regret it but he’s constantly discombobulated. i also imagine that…it takes him longer to settle into the role of parent, esp bc he’s not biologically one ykno? not like it matters to anyone, ofc, but it takes him a long time to truly accept his authority and place, to believe that he has just as much right as j&l to be there, to parent harry. this has the consequence of him always being more indulgent than the other two; after all, he considered himself a godfather before a parent and a lot of that thinking stayed. he lets harry get away with stuff the others might not (and the little mf figures this out later); some of it also comes from sirius seeing so much shit, and facing so much shit himself, that he rationalises a lot of stuff as ‘well, this isn’t the worst it can be, so what’s the harm’ (because his life has been such a roller coaster that he’s forgotten that not everyone’s like that, if that makes sense?)

its obviously not this clear cut but i imagine harry looks at it like this: if he needs unconditional love, he goes to james; rationality and logic, lily; acceptance and calm, sirius. when someone has to be beat up for hurting harry, james steps in. if he needs help burying a body, it’s sirius. dealing with some asshole boss/teacher/classmate’s mother who’s making harry’s life hell? lily. i can keep going but,,,u get the idea, right? this makes sense, i hope lol

i actually think harry’s first birthday is a great example. sirius pushes the boundaries by gifting lil harry a broom; james loses his mind running after him; lily places an industrial sticking charm on harry’s butt, leans back with a glass of wine, and enjoys the show. even as he grows up, lily and james act as the disciplinarian, and sirius is the emotional outlet. all of them fill in each other’s cracks so well, and it’s only when harry grows up that he realises how effortlessly they worked off each other to parent him.

also oh man o man. harry being cunning is,,,,,see, i’ve not considered it this far but it makes perfect sense. i think canon harry actually had so much manipulative energy and it’s often overlooked for his goofier traits but! this is the same dude who used his dead parents to trick slughorn into revealing sensitive info! imagine if that could be channelled into his jilypad interactions 😈

it’s like, it takes him a bit, because his three parents r so smooth, but once he realises that all of them have certain weak spots, he does NOT hesitate to exploit them. (it has the unintended consequence of truly strengthening the jilypad relationship into an unbreakable one bc one thing their kid taught them is to have ironclad communication going at all times so nothing they’ve said, or not said, is used against them). so like, he knows if he wants to sneak out to a party, it has to be sirius and in a specific way—‘i’ll be totally safe, papa, plus i really wanna see what it’s like and idk when it’ll get a chance to again’. if he widens his eyes to pitiful levels, pouts a little, and blinks faster than usual, then james is putty in his arms as long as he’s separated from the other two. divide and conquer becomes the main tool in harry’s arsenal, actually. lily’s the toughest nut to crack, purely bc she doesn’t run on emotions or irreverence, but harry soon learns that if he comes up with a solid, logical case that proves his argument has unbiased merit then he has a good chance of getting her to say yes. (this is good, bc u can arrange words in the correct order, but u can’t always control emotions)

so overall yeah, you’d think one kid + 3 parents would be an easy bet, but harry keeps them on their toes all the fkn time.

#sirius black #james potter #lily evans #jilypad #harry potter #i knew before i even started this that it would be ridiculously long lmao #i just cannot bring myself to shut up #wrt lily and harry’s baby years #i feel v v strongly ab motherhood not coming naturally to her #and becoming a very sore point for her. bc she sees james and sirius and she keeps blaming herself for being an unfeeling robot #when she’s not. she just thinks more logically than them and doesn’t feel as strongly. that doesn’t make her a bad mother #and no matter what j & s say a small part of always thinks like that. until the teen years. and suddenly the dynamics r reversed #bruh i think i need help it’s not even funny how not hinged i am for this trio lmao #there also! padfoot! #a while ago i wrote a lil thing. but i fully believe that whenever harry was emotionally distraught he’d actually go to padfoot #bc he needed someone to just. sit. and be there. while he’s processed emotions #and lily would be too ruthlessly logical and james would be fretting and trying to fix it and sirius would panic. just a little. #but padfoot is a warm comforting weight agains this side and he just lets him be. it’s grounding. #so harry always. without fail. does that #it’s actually 3.5 parents lmao #i do wonder what their parenting fights would about if any. hmmmm. my glasses are too rose tinted for me to consider it #a thought for another day #anyway. hope this endless rambling made sense! and that u liked it! #would love to hear ur thoughts too <3 #pen’s notes #pen’s asks

[rreids]

Hey love I have an ask bc I’ve been feeling super depressed lately and I haven’t wanted to get out of bed lol can you do a one shot when spencer leaves for the week on a case and comes home to the house a mess and the reader laying in bed crying and he makes her shower and eat and cuddles her

oh my love <3 i hope you are feeling a little better. please make yourself a nice warm drink and try to spend some time outside or doing something outside of bed, even if it's just five minutes <3 it's worth it, i promise — someone who also bed rots often

LITTLE BY LITTLE • S. REID X READER

hurt/comfort; reader in a depressive episode; mentions of emotional eating and food; perfect bf spencer; nonsexual nudity and intimacy; kisses; pet names; fluff; ~1k

Spencer being gone was normal, a common occurrence. You didn’t normally struggle when he was gone, but with a mix of bad days at work and him being gone, you could barely bring yourself to eat.

You liked to keep the house clean while he was gone so he’d have one less stressful thing to come back to. This time, it was a mess, clothes and food packaging left around. You’d raided the sweets stash, and made a mental note to replace his chocolate bars before he realized.

“Honey?” Spencer’s voice calls, and you blink away the sting of tears. You weren’t hydrated enough for more to roll down your cheeks, but you didn’t want to worry him. With a swipe of your (his) sweater sleeve, you work on rubbing away tear stains as he comes into the bedroom, tilting his head at the wrappers and mess on the nightstand. “You okay?”

You shake your head, not trusting your voice. “You’re home early,”

“It ended well,” he tells you, gathering the trash left sitting. He doesn’t even comment that his nice chocolate bars were clearly eaten. “How long have you been like this?”

“Few days, maybe?”

“Why didn’t you call?” He sighs. He sounds exasperated, but you know he’s not upset at you as he rubs a soothing hand over your cheek and lets you lean into him.

“I didn’t wanna worry you,” you mumble, voice muffled into his palm. You press a kiss to it, smiling softly when his fingers twitch at the ticklish sensation. “‘S okay.”

Spencer shakes his head adamantly, you know he disagrees. “Find some nice pajamas for me, okay? I’ll be right back.”

He comes back after throwing out the trash. “I put some water on. Tea or hot cocoa?”

“Tea,” you mumble, rubbing your throat.

“With honey. Don’t even try to tell me not to add it.” Spencer grabs the pajamas you scrounged up. “I’ll fluff these in the dryer, too. C’mon, gorgeous,”

He helps you stand and lets you curl into his side as he walks you into the bathroom and helps you undress, pressing a gentle kiss to your shoulder as he tugs the sweater off. You shiver at how cold the air is, and he reaches behind you to turn the water on and let it start to warm.

Spencer carefully brushes your hair out of your face with his fingers, frowning when you pull away a little. He doesn’t comment on it, just studying your face with his intent stare.

“Stop looking at me,” you mumble.

“Just trying to see if you’re okay, sweetheart,” he whispers, ghosting a kiss over your cheek. “You’ll tell me about it after. Do you want me to help you wash up?”

You pause. “Dunno.”

Spencer chuckles. “Ok, well, I’m gonna go start fluffing your clothes and put water in the kettle. Let me know when I get back?”

You nod, wrapping your arms around yourself as his movement creates a draft.

When he peeks back in, you’re staring at the water.

“You have to get in, honey,” he reminds you, voice sweet. It makes you feel like crying.

“I know. I think I’m okay.”

Spencer pauses as his mind processes what you’re responding to. “Okay. Take as long as you need. I’ll be waiting in the living room,”

The water is nice — heated exactly where you like it to be —, and you take much longer than normal letting it run over corded muscles and wash away your sadness as you get clean. It’s nice, and you know you’ll feel better when you get out. Part of you hates that, because it just makes another thing Spencer is right about (and he’s always right about things, so you pride yourself on the times you beat him). 

When you finally step out and towel dry, you find your warm clothes on the counter. He must’ve brought them in while you were distracted.

Finally dressed in clean clothes, you drop the dirty ones in the hamper and pad out to the living room.

Spencer is in comfortable clothes — a Washington DC hoodie, sweatpants, fluffy and mismatched socks — and his hair is no longer styled. That’s the first thing you notice. Then you notice the tea, the bowl of perfectly cut-up fruit, and the spread of cheese, crackers, and lunch meat.

“Figured you wouldn’t want a full meal,” he tells you, patting his thigh. You walk over and settle on him gently, squeaking in surprise when he pulls you into him more tightly and presses kisses on your face until you squirm from the contact, giggling. “C’mon, open,”

He taps the strawberry piece to your lips and you roll your eyes as you eat it.

“I love you, you know that?”

“‘Course I do, Spence,” you tell him, voice soft and scratchy.

“Then tell me. Please? Me not knowing you’re upset hurts more than being unable to be here for you. I can at least call you and leave voicemails or talk you through stuff.”

You sigh, shoulders dropping. “But you’re busy and dealing with hard stuff already.”

“And I will always choose to deal,” he says the word like it’s poisonous, “with what you are struggling with first. I signed up to be your number one supporter. Always,”

He hands you your tea and waits for you to finish drinking before he takes it and sets it back down. He holds your hands, rubbing his thumb over the back.

“Okay? Tell me.”

“Okay.”

Spencer smiles and relaxes, kissing you more gently. “Now eat up, sweetheart. It’s all for you.”

You whine at that, and he cuts you off with a stern look.

“My chocolate bars are not proper sustenance for an adult of your—”

“Spencer.” You mumble, picking up a grape. “Shut up. I’ll eat.”

He smiles, pleased, and leans his head on your shoulder. It should be weird, him watching you eat, but it fills you with warmth and happiness as he traces aimless shapes on your thigh and makes sure you’re okay.

title is bc: little by little you will be okay. i know you will. we all will be.

#my works #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid x you #spencer reid fic #spencer reid #criminal minds #criminal minds fanfic #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid angst #spencer reid scenario #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid oneshot #spencer reid imagine #requested

[bakubunny]

time to bother you-

forcing myself to be a big girl and type this off anon LMAO-

anywho, thinking about daddy shouta absolutely hating thumb sucking —- NOT because he’s against it, but because he doesn’t need you getting sick.

“germs.” is all he says now before plucking your thumb from your mouth.

….zashi giving him the obvious bright idea to just get you a binki, so he can make sure only clean things enter your lil mouth. gets a cute lil carrying case for it so he can bring it along with him when you both go out places.

this is self indulgent- uh oh

good gosh the way i’d stop thumb sucking so gd fast in public (i don’t but if i did, yk).

starr you’re onto something here

but ugh. i’d you’d complain so hard bc that means he wouldn’t want his hands in your mouth either (and his hands are way better 😵‍💫).

he pulled your hand out of your mouth while sitting at a stoplight. “germs, babygirl. stop that, or i’m getting your pacifier.”

heat prickled your cheeks. “i’m sorry?”

“you heard me. one more time, and i’m pulling out your pacifier,” shota repeated.

“y-you brought it with you? you don’t expect me to use that outside the car, do you? we’re in public,” you said.

“yes, i did. and if you keep arguing, you most certainly will. it’s nothing a little face mask can’t hide if you keep your mouth shut,” he replied.

your cheeks burned. it felt embarrassing enough when it was just the two of you and he replaced your hand with the silicone soother as opposed to you seeking it out.

shota continued as the light turned green. “the same applies if you bite your nails. i don’t need my little girl getting sick.”

a shiver hit your neck and your thighs pulled together. “yes, daddy.”

and you tried, you really did, at least when you were out of the house with him. because at home you could process your emotions about it privately. but just two days later on the way to the grocery store, you slipped and popped your thumb in your mouth. shota pulled the pastel adult pacifier out of his pocket almost immediately, kept clean with a plastic cover that popped on.

“don’t make me put it in for you, or you’ll like me even less when we get home. your face mask is in the glove box,” he said.

“but daddy, what if someone tries to talk to me or something?” you asked, more nervous than complaining.

“you squeeze my hand and suck on your pretty paci to your heart’s content,” shota replied. he met your eyes for a brief moment.

“let daddy handle grown up stuff. understood?”

#🧸 #💖 #brb rotting unbelievably hard on daddy!sho & reader with a [yikes] when [help i need to stop] #😵‍💫🫠😮‍💨 #brrrr #tw age play #tw daddy kink #aizawa x reader #aizawa shouta #aizawa shota #bakubunny

[sugar-omi]

Hi! Your writing is amazing and makes my day every time I see you post. Could I request Cove while trying for a baby with a female MC? He’s so sweet and emotional I can totally imagine it would be equal parts super fluffy/adorable and spicy/hot Thank you! ✨

omg ty thats so nice of you to say!!! also tysm for this rq, i've been waiting for someone to ask smth like this bc i was worried i was the only one thinkin shit like this!!! also i think this is a bit more horny than fluffy, which is why i tried to make up for it w lots of kisses from cove LOL but ykw.. i feel like a part 2 wouldnt be so bad either 👀

tags : NSFW, ok for fem/nb readers, after step 4/wedding dlc, buff cove lol, breeding kink, creampie, overstimulation, cove w oral fixation(? a bit implied), cunnilingus, cove "uses" a nickname that you can "insert" bc i can but also cant see him using pet names, + he calls u good girl, "multiple choice" dialogue (just read 1 of the colored text "options" than continue w the rest of the fic, theres no links or anything <3)

synopsis : you and cove try for a baby.

cove tries to be calm.

and he is! after a bit of panic of course, caused by his worries but excitement for fatherhood but also you want him to.. to... oh god he's too embarrassed to think about it, from finally deciding to have a baby the only natural next emotion is calm! he is cooler than a cucumber!

but now you're laid out under him, as beautiful as ever, and even after years of being together cove can't get enough of you; especially when you're so sweet to have like this.

"cove.." your gasp drug cove out of his daze.

you reach up and cup his face, cove leaning into your touch. "y/n.." he kisses your wrist.

"what're you thinking about?"

cove flushes. there's no way he could tell you exactly what he was thinking, saying that he found the idea of coming inside was totally different from thinking it and he was not ready to that something clicked in him when you finally talked about being ready for a baby...

"you.. just- just you, and how lucky i am." cove decided to distract you by kissing down your neck, leaving a new mark under your ear. thankfully it worked, although maybe you just gave it up because you already know what's going through his head.

he starts working his way down your body, and you fall back on the pillows and let cove treat himself to your cunt.

cove tossed your panties somewhere beyond the bed, his days of nervously folding your panties over. and he latches onto your thighs, sucking more marks into your skin and his fingers lovingly work your clit.

"cove.. i wan' more..." you tangle your hands in his hair, tugging on the strands. wordlessly he moves on to your twitchy core, his tongue slipping inside and lapping up your slick.

cove's boisterous ministrations has you grinding against his face, gasping as he works your sensitive clit and adds a couple fingers to the mix, speeding up the process so he can be inside you.

cove hopes you don't see him grinding against the mattress.

he sits up, his fingers spreading you open easily. while you're panting dozily, cove's fingers abandons your cunt so he can grab the lube from the bedside.

"habit.." cove laughs it off sheepishly.

he instinctually reaches for a condom, but realizes and a wave of heat rushes over him. you won't be needing those for awhile...

cove meets your hooded gaze, a knowing look in your eyes.

you grin, full of mischief. "guess we're gonna have to break it."

cove growls lowly, slapping a hand over his eyes. it does nothing to hide his blush and he curses himself when his cock twitches against his leg.

deciding to come out of hiding, cove peers at you from over his nose and you feel your own heart pick up sped at the stark look of his eyes. something about cove seems like he could devour you, but when he leans down to kiss you so tenderly you think otherwise.

cove poured the lube over his hand, coating his length and he hisses at the heat between his hand and cock. hazily cove thinks that this is the hardest he's been since he was a clumsy teenager.

cove captures you in another loving kiss, wanting to be close to you as he sinks inside.

this is your first time going without a condom, being connected like this has both of you holding onto each other, your nails scratching down his shoulder at the new but welcomed sensation.

this isn't the first time you and cove have done it unprotected, but it has been awhile so you both can't help but pull the other person closer, needing more.

cove buries his face in your shoulder, shaking from how wet and hot you are inside like this. he can feel the way your gummy walls flex around him and he pulls his hips back- the whine that comes out of your taut throat has cove closing his eyes and taking in your every sound as he moves so slowly, so sensually but so lovingly when he grinds his hips into yours.

finally, he finds the strength to remove himself from your shoulder, needing to see your face in ecstasy.

cove looked down at your own blissed out face, and if he could see his own face he'd notice that his own face his flushed and if it was possible, his pupils would turn into hearts from how lost in pleasure and love for you he's in.

he situates his hands on your hips, the pads of his thumbs rubbing affectionate circles into your skin.

"ah- cove, cove.. please move." you reach for him, intertwining one of his hands with your own.

he gives a kiss to the back of your hand, and when he rears back his hips to start a rough pace, if you could you'd think that the kiss was an apology for the way he's using your cunt.

cove's grip on your hand and hip is solid, it grounds you and the only thing you can think of is how deliciously cove is fucking you, his cock brushing and bumping against the sensitive and deepest parts of your insides.

you whine loudly and can't help but throw your head back because it's like he's going faster and when your eyes return from their trip to the back of your head, you open your eyes to feast on the sight of your husband/boyfriend.

and it's self explanatory why you're more aroused than a just moment ago; cove's hair is mused from all your tugging, and his glasses are long abandoned so that way he can see the way his cock pumps in and out of your cunt and the creamy ring around the base of his dick.

"ah- i love you. y-you're so beautiful..." cove soothes you, kissing your cheek.

"i- oh fuck right there!" your nails run down his chest, cove is going to be a mural of hickeys and scratches. "i love you too, ahh- cove!"

cove lets go of your hand in favor of your clit, already knowing your body well enough to know when you're going to cum.

"fuck... that's it, y/n, cum for me."

"hah, cove! f-finish with me, please. want- want..." you pant, hazy and driven to babbling from the way cove has worked you up all night.

"i know n/n, cum with me. that's it, good girl." cove leans down to kiss you.

tangled in a passionate kiss, your moans blend together as you finish. cove grinds his hips into you, his cock rubbing the deepest part of your insides and painting them white.

he falls into your shoulder, panting and planting a kiss there.

cove gets up, realizing you don't need a wall of muscle crushing you.

"y/n..."

he starts to pull out, and cove has another revelation that he did not think this through...

his cum is leaking from your spent hole, more cum pushing out with every squeeze of your insides, still twitchy from your orgasm.

"yes cove?"

cove swallows, meeting your eyes and he feels embarrassed that you already know what he's going to say. and that you clearly know how much this is turning him on.

"one.. one more round? i'll be more gentle, i just uh.."

you put your ankle on cove's shoulder. "cove, fuck me again."

cove tenses up, this is gonna end up being a long night...

#cove holden #our life: beginnings & always #smut #olba #cove holden x reader #cove x mc #cove x reader #cove holden smut #our life cove #cove our life #cove holden x reader smut #cove holden x mc #cove holden x mc smut

[scuderiahoney]

full disclosure i've been sitting on this thought ever since i first read blackbird but the amount of emotional whiplash i've been put through both from silly season and life in general has prevented me from stringing it into a coherent ask

but like i've been thinking about danny his little birdie getting matching blackbird tattoos on their leg and when they stand together it looks like the two birds are taking flight. thinking about how some of their favorite pictures are the ones taken on balmy summer nights, where the two of them are pressed together so close, where you can see the two little birds taking flight together, twin flames. and thinking about how it becomes the spot that danny always kisses when he's slotted between her thighs, the spot he worries his thumb over when they're pressed under the covers late at night. he doesn't even need to see it to know it's the right spot, the muscle memory is there.

-🌠

star babes. star, my love. star. i saw this ask this morning and it kept me going all day. i actually had a note while i was writing Blackbird that just said “stick and poke tattoos?” but i didn’t find a way to work it in, so this is perfect i love it thank you so much. adding a read more bc this got long.

i think they’d get the tattoos after they’ve been together for a bit, but tbh not that long? like maybe they’re hanging out over Danny’s winter break and they pass by a tattoo shop and she suggests it and he is absolutely all for it. like yeah matching tattoos are sort of a big deal but it’s not like they’re getting each other’s names, right?

they go in and start looking through the flash designs, and when Danny finds the little bird they’re both set on it. they hold each other’s hands through the process. it’s adorable. he’d get his on his left leg so it stands out, so it’s prominent and not hidden away in all the other ones he has. ugh i can picture them in the tattoo parlor, standing close together while the artist puts the stencil on so they can make sure they line up perfectly.

she’s always liked his tattoos, loves tracing them, but that one’s special because it’s hers, too, you know? and Danny… he’s got a whole photo album on his phone dedicated to her tattoo. some of the pics are sweet and innocent- her in shorts on a camping trip where you can see it peeking out, the picture from the tattoo parlor when it was fresh. but some of them are also for his eyes only. his hand around her thigh, the little birdie between his fingers, her in her underwear, the bird displayed prominently, hickeys and bite marks all around it. you get the idea.

in my head they go on camping trips together a lot. i think they’d sit around the campfire in separate chairs, but close enough that their legs are pressed together. he hates when it gets chilly enough that she puts pants on. definitely pushes the hem of her shorts up if they’re covering the tattoo just so he can see it.

can so see her kissing his thighs when she goes down on him and paying special attention to that spot. he does the same for her. and he def runs his thumb over it as he’s falling asleep, sometimes in his sleep. he swears the skin feels different. she’d call him crazy if he didn’t find the spot every time without even looking.

also i think eventually his nickname for her morphs into just straight up Birdie. and when she meets his friends/people in the paddock they’re surprised to find out that’s not actually her name. just a lil headcanon of mine. someone definitely asks if the tattoo is bc of her name and she’s like… “oh that’s actually not my name, it’s a nickname, but Danny has a matching one!” and he’s either pulling up his shorts or pulling down his pants to show his off

thank you for giving me an excuse to word vomit ab them i love Blackbird Danny sm

#box box #anon #🌠 anon #shootingstar scuderia #mutuals 💛 #dr3 x birdie!

[shopcat]

HI. this is the steve harrington autism post. source: i have the steve harrington style autism that makes me autistic about him

to preface this i would like to say i am working off of personal like interpretation and thru the lens of my own experience :0... also this is long lol <3 so, tl;dr, here are the autistic traits or things that are caused by autism i believe steve showcases, (except.. do read if you like <3):

sensory issues -> wearing only ever the same style of clothes, adjusting/touching his hair, (potentially) eating certain foods

stimming -> walking in place to think, fiddling with small objects, spinning/flipping/throwing objects to keep himself focussed or entertained, listening to music

scripting -> repeating phrases/words aloud and practicing what he's going to say, repeating the "plan" aloud

routine -> strict hair routine with specific steps, was in routine sports with strict rules/timing and enjoys them otherwise, driving robin to school every day without even knowing she couldn't bc it was routine, working jobs that require mindless but engaging tasks including organisation

poor grasp of social cues, especially with girls, and saying the "wrong" thing at the wrong time (including the 6 little nuggets speech, "he ate dustin's cat", confessing to robin, etc)

other people feeling like they have to tell him things he's "missed" socially (dustin telling him he likes robin, eddie telling him he likes nancy)

likes to set/follow rules and is upset when people deviate from them (i.e. max wanting to leave in s4)

out of-the-box/atypical/lateral thinking

delayed processing of thoughts/concepts/complicated subjects especially in high-intensity scenarios

picking up on small details (like background sounds in large areas or recognising something) that other people don't pick up on

fixating on certain things (hair, clothes/shoes, sports, etc)

high pain tolerance/sensory dysregulation (shaking off concussions/consistent, continued ability to function while severely injured)

inability to conceptualise his OWN mortality/safety and engaging in at risk situations with little thought other than instinct + making impulsive choices

developmental differences/delays (literally crawling backwards)

poor grades in school/not getting into college

trouble regulating emotion

poor self esteem due to feeling worthless :(

i also have adhd so i also keep this in mind a little and obv at the end of the day this is just my own interpretation + autism is a spectrum :) NOW. i will go into detail >:)

SOOO i'm not sure if steve was deliberately coded as autistic but i DO think they intentionally in one way or another coded him with a developmental disability of some kind!! which i will talk about first!!

this is shown particularly in season 2 in a couple different instances and continues into season 3 at undercurrent ..

we've discussed this a little before but i also think this is why when people like to just describe him as genuinely "dumb" it like hurts people's feelings 😭 my feelings... and that's not intentional ofc but while it is a personal insecurity of the character himself that is being ironically picked at, positively or not, by those who love him in fandom, it's also evident of something happening under the surface that people may be unaware of imo

i think he display a out of-the-box, atypical or lateral way of thinking combined with delayed processing in a way that is very typical to neurodivergent behaviour!! and more...

in season 2 we get a really nice little look into his psychology about it when nancy is reading his college admission essay (that he presumably asked her to do) and he's sitting there SO nervous and full of doubt and worked up about it he's like. basically twitching 😭

he says "it's crap i know" and nancy's like no it's not! and he's like "ugh it's not good..." sooo stressed out.. and nancy says it just needs some reorganising, which is INTERESTING!!! someone who is insecure in his own skills and inability to get his thoughts across in a succinct way + has good, complex ideas that translate poorly when he tries to explain it out loud or in text + a host of insecurities pre-rooted and explicitly about his own intellectual "failings" all = a very neurodivergent read of Steve Vs School i think

also, maybe a tangent, but: in that essay itself nancy says he starts by using one of his basketball games as a metaphor for his life, then he confuses the metaphor by comparing it to the war his grandfather was in. nancy says she doesn't see how they're connected and he's like "um. it connects because we both won" (i actually think she's being very sweet in this scene!! idg when ppl say she's mean here)

ik this wasn't the show's intention and just extrapolation but i find it really cool + interesting that there IS a war of some kind that steve could talk about that HE fought in, there is a description of high stakes combat where it's him VS them and he is the only one who now has to make this high stakes, risky choice, instead of playing it safe like he always does that relates directly to his life as a metaphor and he DOES feel connected to his grandfather in this sense...

but he can't actually talk about that. so it's basketball. and it's a slightly clunky metaphor that makes it seem like, trite, like oh silly steve, basketball isn't WAR. the essay itself is actually really well-written and evocative!! but to me signifies this inability to directly translate what he's thinking, hence it needs a little "rearranging", or maybe it's a little "all over the place" even

(also, that he crumpled up the entire essay and dismissed it entirely and fell back on nihilistic thinking and "i'll just work for my dad i guess". he already had cast disbelief upon his own ability to thrive because he feels he's not good enough :( )

his failing grades, which ended in not getting into college, tech or otherwise, is a big part of his post-highschool arc i think. to me it also shows sympathy to a problem many young neurodivergent (in every which way, btw) people face, including myself, and is potentially a really almost kind portrayal of the capability of a person not being wrapped up in their intellectual or i guess SCHOLASTIC endeavours and "achievements", and that you can be successful and "useful" to others in different ways :0

to call him dumb and really mean it (both in and out of show -_-) after all this is a certain kind of disservice i guess? like okay i think a little jokey joke is fine and also absolutely RELATING is fine (and another extension of another one of my points which is basically just "he's just like me fr" can actually = "he's JUST like me... like For Real". he's dumb in the way i'm dumb and we're both not actually dumb) but let's all be cool okayyyy

beyond school, i think he displays SOO many behaviours both characteristically and even like in his physicality that build to this beautiful conclusion... i think steve is this guy who was served up to be an initially one dimensional being who proved himself again and again to have a multitude of complexities beneath the surface :). i think his literal entire character arc is adjacent to the autistic experience LOL... perhaps...

he showcases a certain need and comfort in routine in a variety of ways, like:

being interested in sports both watching recreationally (which have timed matches and he HAS to be there on time, too) and as the hobby itself. sports are a high-routine activity with strict rules and rituals, before, after and during, as well as the extra work you have to put in otherwise!!

ESPECIALLY something like swimming, which is all about certain timing (and an individual-based sport as opposed to the team-based basketball) which he took for years!! (and actually got his cpr verification for, which you absolutely don't need to just like. be on the swim team. but it would be the "right" way to do it LOL) (also idk how it worked in 1980s fictional indiana but you need your verification a year in advance to actually do anything with it where i live!! which means he did it FROM freshman year)

driving robin to school every day, and then presumably picking her up for work sometimes too, despite not even knowing she COULDN'T drive herself because he was so dedicated to this routine (and friendship :D <3)

his hair routine!! it's SO specific (four puffs EXACTLY!!! no more no less... and when it's DAMP not WET) and i am honestly of the mind it's actually far more complex of a routine he even makes it out to be .. and i am willing to bet the multi step experience of it all is sooo long and has to be just as specific too. also extra points for it being something he does that aids in his own self-image and would make him feel like he's putting himself together.? so to speak

i think, in a way, that he owns about 9 pairs of shoes and most of them are white sports shoes with a colour accent + he's been shown to wear the colour accent that matches his outfit more often than not. which i spose is a certain kind of. ritual or routine or something.

he also shows a whole host of sensory issues/complexities/...things!!

he wears the same style of clothes like CONSTANTLY. almost everything he owns is either a soft sweater or a polo shirt, plus the same style of jacket he cycles through, all of which are well-worn (despite him being like, rich) :) the exception is that colourblock denim vest (which i think is the exception for him too because he just wanted to look like marty mcfly. which is so autistic)

i.e. wearing something that you know is comfortable over and over that doesn't give you a poor sensory experience, and continuing to buy the same style of clothing because you know it's safe to do so because he FEELS comfortable. super autistic trait. beloved prep trait as well i also just think he doesn't actually care what he wears but whatever

he also sometimes favours tight clothes and sometimes looser/baggier ones (think one day the s4 blue/white polo and jeans, the next a sweater and loose chinos) which indicates to me possible different sensory needs in the day by day...

he also wears a lot of undershirts, including with the scoops ahoy uniform (which could've been to avoid a POOR sensory experience)

he adjusts/runs his fingers through his hair and makes sure it's in a nice state at an almost compulsive level but it's also like an afterthought kind of. it could also just be a sensory thing to want to retouch his hair and play with it and follow through with the prior routine of it Looking Good + a grounding technique for sure

along with that he stims a LOT, including the thing where he has to twirl or throw ANYTHING in his hands up to and including -> a lighter, the baseball bat MIDFIGHT, a torch, a phone MIDFIGHT, his ice cream scooper, keys, his sailor hat, a banana, a random ball he found... he's also very fiddly and tends to sort of be happy sitting quietly and doing something over and over like that (this is also a trait with adhd :) )

the jobs he worked are relatively low intensity despite customer interaction and had him working with his hands plus at FV there's a lot of sorting/organisation. also "not my TAPES man" because he already sorted them and now it's ruined 😭

you tend to see him taking a little moment for himself in the background of scenes a lot, sometimes with robin as well!! he kind of just wanders off and does his own thing but in the wake of the high emotion, high adrenaline various combats in-show it makes sense, even more so if he just needs a little moment to himself to unwind

he walks/paces to think!!!

the reason he and robin only even threw up in season 3 is a) the stimulating lights he noticed that then b) over-stimulated them

this one's a little less obvious but he listens to the same kind of music and listens to it LOUDLY when he's stressed 😭 he also doesn't turn it off even if he like, technically should like on the way to fight monsters. i think he just likes music a lot tbh but also very autistic to me (and also a reason why he and eddie would be friends and/or kiss on the mouth)

one of the biggest things that sounds off to me is his social interactions :0 he is hailed as this like, ladies man but almost near constantly plummets to the earth in insane social blunder which personally i love actually (and it extends beyond these situations too!!). all the hottest boys are autistic...

i know that this is to show him just like, losing his charm...? and that he peaked in highschool or something and i do love his patheticness but it's also sooo autism. one of the reasons i actually think he's gay (lol) is his compulsive need to try and "land" a social interaction with a woman, then fail, while also not "feeling the spark" with the women he DID land and failing to see why (like his date at the basketball game). he's constantly seeking companionship but it feels like it's just out of his reach and he doesn't get it... sigh... and that it's definitely in part bc he feel he can't relate to them because HE'S so different i think. for whatever reason. multiple.

in season 3 the ENTIRE you rule/you suck board is like a beautiful shrine to this... he's honestly so funny . but like constantly awkwardly flirting and somehow saying the wrong thing every time whilst also not getting that they're Not responding to him until they like, leave, which is like. a statistical unlikelihood to me of times this can happen without something else going on in his little brain. i also like that he "invented" a makeout point bc that opens up the ability to just go um. let's go to skull rock. and the person would be like oh okay yes i am going to makeout with steve harrington.

beyond just girls or failed flirting or whatever a lot of his interactions with the kids or his other friends ping to me as having trouble with social cues and some accidental bluntness!! a FAVOURITE being -> "dart ate a cat?" "no. what? no." "what are you talking about? he ate mews" "who's mews?" "it's dustin's cat" "STEVE..." 😭😭 i love him. also him suggesting he could work his charm on the dean of the school and nancy being like... not that kind of charm.

oh another good moment for this is in the epilogue to season 3 actually like he's trying so hard to show he's seen Some movies (but only remembers the significant/stand out details) and then when robin's like can you give us a moment he's just like. Why. and does this funny little head shake movement. and robin does the steve -_- and he backs away kubrick staring... beautiful scene

he also falls victim i think to saying the wrong thing at the wrong time which is a lot of the time not necessarily his like FAULT ofc but suggests further little issues or . unalignmentd with social interaction. the entire 6 little nuggets speech to nancy to me is one of these situations (and maybe the convo in the woods with her?? idk) where he's kind of just talking and digging a hole and the other person is sort of just sitting there. it's also shown with like "like the germans?"

ALSO, a lot of the time people end up coming to him specifically and sort of like... telling him what to do/how HE feels?? and i think he just sort of goes along with it. in season 3 dustin tells him he has a crush on robin until he kind of talks himself into it and then he accidentally crash-fails for a second time by confessing to her at a sort of insane time as well (not that i think he actually had any feelings for her!!). and in season 4 eddie does the SAME with nancy which is almost spectacular.

alsoo while i think he struggles with certain social cues i also think he's very emotionally intelligent and he picks up on people's feelings easily which i guess someone could say it seems to counter? other autistic traits (silly) but to me i think. autistic people are aware of PLENTY of social cues sometimes the cue is just stupid -_- and i can read other people's emotions for sure in fact i'm almost like hyper attuned to it i just don't know how to RESPOND to it a lot of the time. whereas steve picks up on dustin's nerves at the snow ball and reassures him accordingly (and so cutely..), then picks up on robin's emotions after his confession and near-immediately course corrects after her confession in order to make her laugh!!! he was also really good with picking up on nancy's feelings and knowing exactly what to do about it/using forethought about it (like idk holding her hand when they were having sex or something to ease her nerves but also noticing she was upset at the library) when they were together at least 🤔

there are also a number of other various things very dear to me that i have no where else to include. LIKE:

his high pain tolerance!!! he's able to shake off torture, multiple concussions, various beatings with little to almost NO actual repercussions. in s4 it was actually really interesting how he was feeling bad enough to almost faint after the bats but once he was patched up he was "fine", and acted like he was fine for... the rest of the entire show. he did a backflip. high pain tolerance is an offshoot of a sensory dysregulation!!

specifically a lack of filter and moments where he goes "too far" especially when he's struggling with an emotional dysregulation of sorts, like with dustin in s4 or even with jonathan s1, but also like. the dumb faces he was making behind his date's back.

"when i was a baby, i crawled backwards"!!! autistic children can have different development i.e. their early CHILDHOOD development that can present itself in a variety of ways!! atypical to the norm crawling/walking is one of them (also matches up with robin taking 6 months longer to walk than other babies which she Also said to nancy and i think this is significant of something and i don't know what. maybe it's just funny. also stobin soulmates ofc).

to me, being the guy who mid plan debrief is the one saying "so let me get this straight" AND that he's the one asking the necessary questions to get everyone's minds (and in the 4th wall sense the literal plot) moving suggests that he both feels the need to want clarification of like, plans/instructions and what the situation is so everyone is caught up and he didn't get it wrong, and that just speaking it aloud helps cement it in his mind (which is also scripting as well i believe). also his ability to ask the RIGHT "wrong" questions suggests out of-the-box thinking as well (i would say both of these are also an adhd trait!)

his friendship with robin is honestly a point for me LOL. robin is an example of a character i do believe IS intentionally absolutely autistic coded, especially in season 4 but also 3, and his bond with her seems to be a personal one based in trust in each other and their own similarities... in season 4 when they're lamenting their love lives and say they should "just combine" is so important to me.. ugh

he's very particular and possessive about his belongings in an almost pedantic way (c'mon man not my SCOOPER! and wipe your feet before you get in my CAR and honestly even that he refuses to let max drive it fullstop, a little bit)

he also ate. SO many bananas at scoops i think for a time being it ended up being a safe food which literally happened to me as well. a very small thing but i like it

he scripts!! ie he repeats words and phrases aloud as a form of stimulation and getting himself to think or practices what he's going to say before things so he's "scripting" it (his "i'm sorry wtf am i sorry for" speech before he runs into dustin in s2)

he gets along better people who, by majority, aren't in his peer group i.e. the kids!!! and even robin and nancy were a little younger! he is very genuinely friends with the kids and it is Very Genuinely so sweet, but particularly with dustin too i found it sooo... <3

he also shows like these moments of high-intensity like silly child-like qualities of (autistic) joy LIKE when he sees dustin in scoops and they have their little lightsaber fight (which they. had practiced and made beforehand) that is just so sweet to me...

he picks up on things that other people don't!!! as the Normal Guy in a group of people he typically ends up settling in that role BUT he's multiple times picked up on small details that other people don't or DIDN'T notice, which is a neurodivergent trait!! he recognised the song in the russian recording, recalled where it came from like. right after + was the only one who heard dustin in the upside down + other things like noticing when someone's missing from a room

i also think he may be prone to like. i guess sensory overload/emotional dysregulation when he reacts what i think is appropriately to these HUGE scary scenarios but everyone else is like chill out and therefore it's inappropriate to them that he's losing his mind about it. but as time passes and he gets used to it all it lessens for sure (most evident in season 1) but there are moments where he struggles to reign in his truest reactions to things i think LOL. he is also just very dramatic tbf ☝️

his other vague neuroticisms but specifically commenting when things aren't Correct or Right or Safe including complaining about the sterility of the needle he was being injected with mid TORTURE

when he defaults to sports metaphors bc that's the easiest thing he can relate to in s2. god

100% of autistic people i talk to about this all go OH YEAH he's so autistic. tbh i think autistic people relating to a character can be enough of a diagnosis to me. peer diagnosis...

i just think so :)

in conclusion...

#steve harrington #🍦 #WARNING . this is like 3k #sts

[bitchinbarzal]

“but hear me out,, mase always swore he’d never be like mama mct’s ex boyf bc he was a piece of shit,, then he goes and cheats on her… that’s definitely that catalyst in mason & trevor’s friendship bc trevor trusted mason with his baby sister”

Just this… 👐🏻

It happened before they were together so could I really be considered cheating, Trevor thought so.

It was all fun and laughter in the ducks locker room majority of the time. Guys would make digs at one another it was all quite fun.

Jamie and his wife had recently announced their venture to adopt a babygirl and were picking out names so the team decided to weigh in.

Names were thrown about until Jamie said “My mom said Lola”

“Hey Tav, remember when you fucked that girl from where was it? Texas or something? Wasn’t her name Lola?” Someone shouts and Mason’s body freezes.

“Hard to believe Mason was ever with anyone who wasn’t little Z, she’s got him wrapped around his finger for like three years now”

The teammate frowns “No… tav you screwed that girl like three-“

“Okay enough dude” Mason snaps and Trevor interjects “No, let him finish. He screwed this girl when?”

“Like three years ago? It was what start of the season?”

Trevor looks at Mason who is visibly on edge before he pounces on him “You son of a bitch!”

Everyone has to get in to rip them away from one another. Eventually pulling them apart while their chests heave

“I trusted you! She trusted you! You have a baby!” Trevor screams.

“I know, I know ok?! We weren’t together yet and it was just one stupid night Z!” Mason défends to which Trevor snarls

“The first night, the night you picked her up I told you, I said to you to take care of her! You promised me!”

Trevor didn’t often get so wound up when it didn’t concern his kids but his baby sister was not grounds for disrespect.

“Trev it was nothing!”

Trevor rolls his eyes and grabs his bag “You better tell her”

“Trevor she’s just had a baby, I can’t-“

“Tell her. Or I will” he snaps, leaving the locker room.

When Mason left the facility he drove around a bit just trying to hold off coming home so he wouldn’t have to face you.

When he eventually walked in you were sat with Jude on the couch reading to him

“Hey sweet boy” you greet, standing up to meet him in the doorway “Say Hi Jude, hi daddy”

The sweet moment is followed by a silent pause when mason says “Babe can you sit down? I have to speak with you”

You frown “Baby what’s wrong?”

“Please?” He gestured to the couch and you oblige, shushing Jude in the process.

Mason leans against the coffee table and you say

“Mason just say it, you’re scaring me!”

“I slept with someone” he blurts out and your heart drops.

“You What?”

He sighs “It was a long time ago, it was when you went back to New York to stay with your parents after your ex and you said you needed space so I went out and I just- fuck babe I’m sorry, ok?”

“So you just stuck your dick in another woman because what? I needed space?” You Ask and it’s scary how calm you are.

“It wasn’t like that! I didn’t know if you’d even want me when you got back!”

“But you didn’t care to find out eh? What happens if she’d stuck around? Would you have been with her? Would this never have happened?”

The this in question is gestured by pointing between you both and mason looks at your sleeping baby boy, thinking of the life where he wasn’t here.

“I didn’t want to hurt you”

You scoff “Well you have”

“Babe please it’s not like I did it ever again, we weren’t together!”

“But we had an emotional connection Mason! I wanted you and you couldn’t wait until the next thing that opened her legs came along” you cried “I thought you weren’t like him”

His face drops “Hey, I am nothing like him!”

“Oh yeah? I’m not finding all that much different right now” you taunt and mason knows you’re trying to get under his skin so he lets it slide.

He sighs “What do you want me to do, I’ll do anything to prove how sorry I am” he begs and you nod

“After this, I’m done” you nod to Jude “I don’t want anymore babies with you”

You’d spoken about at least three kids with you being one of four and mason being one of two.

“What-“

“And I don’t want to get married” you reply, handing back the ring he’d recently given you when you’d given birth “I can’t trust you won’t break by heart again”

Mason watches then as you stand up and drop a sleeping baby Jude in his arms and walk out the room. Then Jude begins crying to which mason hushed him and mumbles

“I know exactly how you’re feeling bud”

#mason and mom

[dipplinduo]

I have no idea what you have planned in your devious little mind (compliment), but i have a fluffy image that I like to HC happens after the regular DLC story and lowkey hoping itd fit after whatever the heucking angsty shenanigans youve got planned.

Basically, like right after the climax of ID but before Keiran and Carmine go have a break, ornin SSD's case sometime after Peachy-runt is booted to the moon, Keiran's out sitting out in the Terrarium. Hes feeling guilty and selfshamey, dosnt really know what to do, is just wallowing.

By coincidence, Juliana is out in the Terarium conviniently nearby, probably having a picnic bc part of this idea relys on her pokemon being out, but she hasnt noticed Kerian presence yet. Idk, hes on the other side of a small hill, he foind a lil spot where its intentionally hard to see him, hes just not in Jules' eyeline, whateber reason, she dosnt see him from where shes making sandwiches. But one of her Pokemon dose see him.

Ogerpon.

Now, I may be projecting, but after what shes been through Id suspect Ogerpon is pretty good at reading someone's emotional state based off of body language. And she get to just stare at Keiran for a while, and is able to get a better read on the kid rather than 'lowkey obsessed guy who took the answer of No poorly'.

Keiran is spaced out, trying to process everything that happened, when he feels a gentle weight on his side. Ogerpon has come up, sat down, and is leaning against his shoulder bc she recognises that this kid needs to be grounded to help fight the thoughts. Even if shes still not a fan of him, she recognises that noone should fight those kinds of things alone. So she sits with him as he starts to shed tears.

(Ok im defo projecting, but moving on,)

That scene is the main bit of fluff i like to hc, but its could also continue to Jules' other pokemon take note that Ogerpon has wandered off, sees Keiran too. And they all make their way over one by one as Jules is still making sandwiches (either shes not getting the effect she wanted and starting over, she is meticulusly placing ingredients, or is actually making enough for all of her pokemon to have one)

By the time Jules is done with the sandwich, all of her pokemon are gone (except Koridon/Miridon bc they focused on Sammich), and she finally moves and sees them all huddled around something.

She approches and gets pulled into the cuddle pile on the other side of Keiran, who is now silently crying due to overwhelm, he did not expect this level of care from her pokemon and is able to get a bit of cathartic realease rather than bottling it all up.

Im imagaining it like an animation, and it closes out with Jules taking Keirans hand and squeezing it as she leans more into his shoulder, showing her own quiet support.

God this is some good fluff, projection or no. Immaculately good.

I promise I'm gonna do ya good with end end ending/epilogue.

#kikis def gonna be um...going through it when all is said and done #my fics #fic ideas #dipplinshipping #kieran pokemon #kieran x juliana pokemon #juliana pokemon #juliana x kieran pokemon #kieran x juliana #juliana x kieran #fave #ogerpon pokemon

[roxineedstosleep]

god, gotham knights jason with battinson,,,,, the sheer cuteness of bruce having a son THAT big :'> I just know he'd be so protective over his quiet soft spoken dad!! can we get a one shot with maybe one of the batkids being mean to bruce bc he can't be there for something important to them! while he tries placating them and paying no mind to them being rude, jason is behind him entirely and glares at his sibling. he hates seeing bruce said. god help you if you make him cry in front of jason

(Jason, behind Bruce, during a discussion between he and an of his brothers)

Children can be cruel.

God, and everyone who interacts with children, knows that children are truly peculiar beings.

They are innocent, mouldable souls, have no real control over all their emotions and are always in constant development and moulding of their persons.

And well.

If a child in a structured home, no matter what form their home takes, they can be cruel at times.

Bruce can say that he was not so lucky.

I mean, he knew he wasn't the best of children. After his parents, it's a miracle Alfred didn't leave him with some distant relative or in the care of the state or in a full-time boarding school. Fuck. He had repeatedly been a walking nightmare and to this day he doesn't know how Alfred could have had so much love and dedication to him to keep him from getting lost along the way.

And after adopting, raising, and fighting with Dick? well, he learned that children are a tricky business.

And he does the best he can. He really tries.

The mistakes he made with Dick, he avoids making with Jason. After Jason died, he reframed his whole upbringing with Tim. And with Damian's arrival, he happily had all his kids to support him in the process.

"It takes a whole town to raise a baby."

It never felt so real.

Now that Dick had grown up and matured in his own way, had lived his own experiences, you could say they had a better relationship. With Jason things were tragic, but at least now they were in a safe place.

But Tim and Damian… they were something else.

He really tried, Dick and Jason were different. Each of his sons was. But the circumstances of their arrivals and the timing also played a big part in that.

Dick was basically an accidental baby. As if Bruce had gotten someone pregnant in their teens and was thrown into his care when the mother no longer wanted to raise him. Bruce was a teenage father with Dick; in the best of terms. He wouldn't eat his own vegetables and had to make sure a depressed, angry kid ate his without tearing up half the room. Without Alfred things would probably have gone south quickly.

That explains their constant bickering during Dick's early youth. It explains why they can feel close and hate each other at the same time. They were both children emotionally when they got together and one was in the care of the other. It was unfair, but love was stronger… at least until the differences came and they had to hurt each other and separate in order to get back together.

With Jason, Bruce felt like a young single father. How if in the middle of college he finds out he's a father and has to take care of it. Sure, he's more mature, knows a few parenting tricks and has more of a sense of responsibility about childcare. Thank God Jason was a good, rocky kid, but with a heart of diamond sitting down with the best of intentions.

Jason was a boy who needed love and wanted to give love to whoever had the desire to give him love. That's where Bruce comes in.

Bruce adored Jason, learned from the mistakes he made with Dick and took advantage of his maturity to do better with his new son. If it weren't for the mind game and the fact that Bruce himself couldn't get over his parents, and therefore couldn't help Jason with his own. It really would have been the healthiest relationship he had in comparison to the rest of his children.

But Bruce isn't perfect, and that along with Jason growing up in a place where Bruce and Dick had arguments and there was a lot of elite pressure in front of him. Jason left, they fought, he died and when he came back things were not good for a long time.

Now they are. Of course they are. But neither of them really want to remember those bad feelings. They have a different kind of love.

Tim and Damian are different for different reasons. Clearly and justifiably different reasons.

Tim arrived when Bruce was at his lowest point. Damian came in demanding and believing something of Bruce that he was not.

And they're still kids, still in training, and Bruce needs twice as much patience to be able to raise them both and to be able to accommodate everything he can do for them based on the needs of both of them.

It's not easy.

It's not always happy.

But he loves, LOVES, his children, and for that very reason he won't stop trying.

Even they come to hate him. He will console himself with the idea that at least he fought to the end.

And Jason, now that he's grown up. He knows that.

He knows that Bruce loves every one of them with every cell in his body. Every part of his mind and soul is dedicated to him and all his brothers. No matter what happens, Bruce will put them first in any situation.

So now that Bruce is actually an adult and can really deal with his children… it pains him to realize how unfair his siblings can be to their father.

Of course, there are things that Jason doesn't forgive his father for, and he himself accepts that he is not a complete victim of everything that happens between him and Bruce. But at least he understands that there is a backstory and tries to get to a point where they both don't lose control.

But his brothers don't seem to understand that.

He sees how his father, his poor father, tries on more than one occasion to reach out to his brothers, to argue about things that could be better, about the unnecessary risks they take. But his brothers only shout and smash everything their father gives them.

That's why, although he doesn't always get into the fray, he subtly sets the record straight.

When Bruce is away, which sadly has happened on more than one occasion, he and Dick have taken care of their younger brothers. And not having the same patience and focus as his father, he has come to have a kind of impact on his siblings. So, take advantage of that.

He casually stands behind his poor, distressed father. And he looks at the booger on duty and gives him the same look he usually uses on the fucking sons of bitches he deals with every night. He do not do any kind of harsh mad expression. Only a simple glance, thats all.

And that's what's enough.

That's all.

Of course that's enough. Bruce still gets yelled at, but at least the yelling subsides a few at a time until all that's left is apologies and a well-deserved hug.

He fucked up with Bruce before he died and then disappeared for years.

He doesn't want his brothers to experience that. No.

And he doesn't want Bruce to experience that feeling of losing a son at a bad time either.

(Jason's "you better put your fucking shit together bro, or u gonna regret it" glance)

#jason loves his father #protective jason todd #bruce wayne #battinson #dc batfam #batfamily #batfam imagine #batfamily shenanigans #robert pattinson batman #dc #jason todd #tim drake #damian wayne #dick grayson #red robin #red hood #robin #nightwing

[sardonic-sprite]

Part 2 of Dad!Tim AU (so Q doesn't murder me in my sleep /aff) tw: referenced rape, referenced attempted/intended murder

(Part 1)

As we hit the ninth month, everyone is tense and on tenterhooks, but Tim is by far the worst. He can't sleep for more than an hour without jerking awake from a nightmare: the faceless child growing up, hands around a sword, smirking on Ra's's right hand, maybe coming to Gotham, but to hurt Tim's family, not join them... other times it's the child dying in infancy or even birth, and Tim doesn't know if that part is worse, the grief, or the next part, the fear, as Ra's's sister advances on him to try again

Nine months to the day since Paris and Tim is a wreck and the whole family is buzzing out of their skin, ready to ACT, but its not until 2 weeks later that they finally get Talia's call.

And in the background, there's a baby crying

Everyone is all wtf talia we said we were gonna WAIT and she grimly tells them there would be no waiting, she needs them to come pick up the baby now. Because the baby is a girl. Because Ra's will only accept a MALE heir, and he's not going to bother raising a child he has no use for. Because Ra's's sister is furious with the disgrace of bearing the wrong sort of baby and wants nothing to do with something that was supposed to be her greatest honor. Talia can only be gone so long before they will realize she has not in fact buried the infant in the snow, so they need to come NOW

Everyone bursts into frantic motion, freaking out, livid, terrified. Its all way too much, and Tim just sits and stares blankly, because he thought he'd have just a little more time. Dick sees this, and gently asks if Tim wants to stay back, and if he wants someone to stay with him. He does. So the others go, and Dick sits and holds Tim's hand as Tim tries to process. And he realizes that if not for Talia, all of his pain, all of his terror, all the violation would be for absolutely nothing.

And then he realizes that makes him MAD.

How dare they? He thinks. How DARE ra's and his sister throw the child away just because Tim gave her the "wrong" chromosome? HOW FUCKING DARE they treat a human child like a goddamn happy meal toy, like it -- she -- is disposable because she isn't what they wanted?

He gets up ("Tim?" Dick asks softly) and goes to find Alfred. The room right across from his, Alf, the one that has a view of the gardens, thats the nursery. Tim may still not be READY for this but he'll be damned if he can't do better than fucking RA'S.

So he and Dick and Alfred spend the tense, anxious hours moving and arranging baby stuff in the room, while Barbara folds all the onesies and diapers into the drawer and calls leslie about formula bc they don't know any nursing mothers

They get the call that the family arrived, they have the baby, they're on their way home, and Talia will keep up the pretense as long as she can so they can get back to Gotham. Baby's sleeping now, they say, and swear she looks just like Tim.

"You've got a regular little Snow White on your hands," Jason laughs, and no one on the plane is ever allowed to tell Tim how close Jason came to stealing his child (HER CHUBBY LITTLE CHEEKS STEPH JUST LOOK i see them jay.) "Black hair, pale skin (you're still paler), red lips, well, whole red face when she really wants to wail."

Tim doesn't know what to make of that yet, but at least maybe it seems like he'll be able to look at the child without constantly seeing her mother. (Not that she deserves that title).

They can't paint the nursery tonight and have it be dry, but they're going to paint it, Tim decides. Something colorful and happy, not like the soulless beige he grew up with. Nothing like his soulless childhood.

The family arrives. They arrive and Tim and Alfred and Barbara and Dick go down to meet them, Tim clutching Dicks hand. The door of the plane opens and they file out, and its Cass, a complicated mess of emotions on her face, who holds out the tiny, TINY little swaddle

Tim's hands are shaking as he reaches out, but no one says so. Dick just carefully supports Tim's arms to make sure he's steady

Jason was right, he thinks. She is a little Snow White. Her skin's a little darker than his, but still paler than he'd have thought. She's got black hair, but that was a guarantee. She's got a little red mouth that yawns into a perfect O and blinks open blue eyes, but he doesn't know if they'll stay that color.

Its hard to believe he's a FATHER. He has a DAUGHTER. He's still only 17.

That's when Baby begins to cry, and Tim panics, and the others have to calm him down and promise its not his fault, she's only hungry, and they go upstairs to get a bottle. Then they all troop to the nursery, where Alfred and Bruce have to help Tim settle in Martha's old rocking chair, and show him how to hold the Baby in one arm and the bottle in the other hand, and help her eat.

Slowly the others trickle away, to sleep, to give him privacy, because jts all so surreal, and there may or may not be tears on Tim's face. Finally its just Bruce and Alfred, and they help Tim put Baby in the cradle thats been in the Wayne family for nine generations. Then they go, and Tim's still sitting on the rocking chair, staring, like this fever dream is going to disappear, and there won't be baby or nursery or this awful terrifying weight in his chest, and he's not sure if he would really want that or not

He hears a soft sound by the door and springs up, grabbing for a weapon he doesn't have, but its only Damian, looking as lost and unsure as Tim.

"I thought you went to bed"

"I could not sleep."

Tim can't really argue with that

Damian edges closer, looking at Baby's face like he's searching for something there.

"Have you named her?"

"No," Tim scoffs, because he didn't fucking want her, he thought she'd come with a name, just barely laid eyes on her or held her. Then he feels shame because what kind of father doesn't want to name his own child? His voice softens as he explains, "i have no idea where to start"

"At the end then," Damian suggests, just as soft. "With Wayne." And it might just be the kindest thing the kid has ever said to Tim.

"Ok," he says. "And in the middle?" It feels like a cop-out, asking Damian of all people to name TIM's child. But Tim can't... there's no logical process to follow here, naming is an emotional experience, it forges a CONNECTION and Tim just... all that furious resolve is much harder to draw from when he's confronting the reality it entails

Damian purses his lips, hesitating. Finally, he says, "There's Bahar. It... it means 'brilliant.'"

And at first, Tim balks, because no, that's what RA'S wanted from the child, Tim's brilliance, and what the FUCK, Damian-- and then he realizes. That... this might be, no it probably is, Damian saying "fuck ra's. The baby girl will be brilliant, and you're brilliant too."

He finds himself smiling, just a little, and repeats, "Bahar. I... I like it."

Damian smiles just a faint bit too, then.

"What... what about the beginning?" Tim tries, but Damian shakes his head and tells him that's for Tim to decide. He turns to go. Then Tim calls him back.

Slowly, hesitantly, Tim asks, "What's the word for 'snow?'"

Perfect little snow white... bury the kid in the snow... fuck ra's...

"... 'eira.'"

Damian leaves, and Tim looks down at the tiny little baby.

"Eira," he tries. "Eira. Eira Bahar Wayne."

It almost looks like Eira smiles.

Part 3

#sprite wrote #tim drake #dad!tim au #mostly angst #but if got fluffier #and the fluff will only grow #damian wayne #is a good bean #content warnings at top

[pyporapy]

Hey Jay :) give me a rundown of your OCs >:)

This has been sitting in my askbox for a while and I forgor to reply sorry Birby 😭🙏

Anyway!!! Let me give you the shortest possible rundown of my ocs as I try not to die in the process:

This is Grisha. He’s a bitch and can see dead people but it’s not a good thing. Chronically ill because of the dead people thing and has Some Issues regarding religion. Suffers of the godforsaken combination of “too many trust issues” x “very desperate for human connection”. God’s little chew toy and very painfully aware of it

This is Felix. He tries to be cool but is actually just some guy (and a kinda lame one at that but in a good way, at least). Has some deep-seated issues regarding himself and his sense of identity after years of pretending to be someone he isn’t for people that were never all that worth it but surely this won’t ever come back to bite him in the ass at some point. Neither will the fact he keeps running away from the past. Very emotionally congested but acts like he’s alright and chilling. Loves his daughter and is a true doñita at heart. Also he’s half ecuadorian which is important to mention to Me, an ecuadorian

This is Laura. She’s as close as we get to the only normal person in the cast but if anything she’s just the Least fucked up one. Constantly stressed and an overachiever. Enough caffeine in her blood to kill a horse. She does a good job at making people respect her but also she’s a girlfailure at heart. Not nearly enough social skills which is why her best friend is the only other guy in the office who doesn’t have friends either. Needs a hug and a nap but is too proud to ask for any of those. Doesn’t believe in the supernatural at all so she feels like everyone around her is pulling an incredibly elaborate prank to which she doesn’t get the punchline

This is Viktoria. She’s a bodyguard and a trained assassin since childhood. Feels incredibly disconnected from her emotions due to this that when they hit her on like a random tuesday at 3 AM she doesn’t know what to do. Feels more like a tool than a person and is so used to people not actually paying attention to her as a human being that when someone does she’s too awkward to keep the interaction going. Can and will kill you but she just wants to retire at this point. Tough and terrifying but also kinda lame but she’s allowed to be. As a treat

This is Cain. He’s a priest but he doesn’t actually believe in God, at least not in the orthodox way. Only reason he has the job is that they found him outside the church like a kitten in a wet box and decided to take him in, and the only reason he keeps the job is that somehow he’s good enough at it that more people join the church. A huge asshole so people either genuinely like having him around or just put up with him. Can also see dead people but it’s not nearly as catastrophic as Grisha’s case. Also incapable of forming healthy connections with people but that’s a problem he refuses to unpack

This is Gabrijel. He’s a millionaire and a model and a celebrity and a philantropist and a cult leader but the public is unaware of only one (1) of those things, and you can probably guess which one. Manipulative and cunning and overall a pretty terrible guy but charismatic enough for people to think there’s nothing wrong with him. Completely derranged but composed enough….until he Isn’t. Viktoria can’t stand him and anyone that works directly under him doesn’t like him but he’s too pretty to be bothered I suppose. Wants to bring literal Hell onto the world bc he thinks he’s Jesus or something bigger. Wouldn’t want him to haunt the narrative or anything, that would suck

The very general plot is that a bunch of people are being murdered. Grisha and Laura investigate it. Felix gets involved because he knew one of the victims and has mysteriously large amounts of information. Gabrijel is responsible for it and it’s all linked to his evil plan(TM). He first tasks Viktoria with killing them but Viktoria is done with his shit so she acts as a double agent for him and for Laura so she can Maybe get a day of peace in her life for once. Everything goes to shit at some point but I can talk abt it later since I feel like this is already too convoluted(?). And Cain is just There for the drama of it all ig

That’s it ty for asking and sorry for taking so long avdhebfhej hopefully I will share some more canon stuff here or on instagram instead of silly things 🙏 they haven’t left my head in over six years and I might start making it everyone’s problem I’m afraid

#forgot to add that homosexual sheananigans ensue but i think that was obvious #grisha is living in a horror thriller #laura and felix in a crime procedural #viktoria in a psychological drama #gabrijel in those movies abt girls having the craziest summer of their lives #and cain in a telenovela #that’s the summary of the summary dhufnfjfnfjrj #anyway i had fun doing this so if yall have any more questions drop them in my askbox i promise i’ll try to not forget ehe…… #long post #pyporapy oc

[wanderingblindly]

PLEASE give me the directors cut of Til The End Of The Line bc that fix haunts me in an ethereal manner and I have simply not moved on 🫶🏻

oh my god where do I even start with 'Till the End of the Line, it was such an odd one to write. I started in back in August and literally forgot it existed until November when I was just flipping through my files.

I stopped writing it because it just felt like pretentious, surface level, uninteresting emo drivel. But when I picked it back up, I felt myself really connecting to the emotions I channeled at the time.

Plus, I had been writing a lot of comedy at the time (see: Landoscar) and wanted to flex a different creative muscle. So really, the entire thing was incredibly self serving. But anyways, let's get into some content!

The Origins

I actually received a comment on Ao3 a very long time ago with someone talking about crying on a train while reading a fic, and that idea always sort of stuck with me.

The next thing was, as it always goes, a random line popping into my head one day while going about my Tasks:

But so much life can grow in a place where no one stays

This sort of ended up being the thesis for the entire narrative: the beauty in a passing moment between two people that, maybe, won't ever see each other again despite the mark they've left on each other's lives.

The Writing Process

So I bounced around a lot with how I wanted this to read. Initially I wrote it as a traditional narrative (I have about half of the fic written in an entirely different style), but then I realized that didn't fit the vibe. I wanted it to have more of a liminal, 'what parts of this are real' energy to it, which is why I decided to not use traditional quotation marks.

The italics, something people often use for thoughts, made it feel more like the entire thing could have been made up in Charles's head. I hope that came across haha.

Here's two snippets of parts from the other style that got cut:

And so Charles gets like this sometimes, cause and timing unknown. It hits him suddenly, the overwhelming and inescapable need to just cry. One small inkling, a fragment of an idea, buries itself into every corner of his mind; spreading like a wildfire until every other thought, any distraction, just reminds him of the ache. Deep in his bones. An unsettling mix of nostalgia, loneliness, and something unnamed. Something heavy. It hangs around his neck like a lead weight.

And:

Charles looks up at the stranger, eyes following him down as he sits beside him.  “Rough day?” He tries again, voice just as soft and accent just as distinct.  “I don’t know.” Charles says numbly as he takes the tissue, blotting his eyes uselessly as the tears continue to flow down with reckless abandon. He hums contemplatively in response, adjusting the hood of his sweatshirt around his neck and leaning back against the vibrating walls of the train.

Idk if the difference is entirely apparent, but I wanted Charles's narrative to feel very... sensory. What he's seeing, what he's feeling, not so much the traditional way of writing where you're guiding the reader through a true plot.

The Setting

At first, I put serious time into deciding what country they were in, what train they were on, what neighborhood it started and ended in, etc.. However, the more I poked around and considered different ideas (Berlin, New York, London), the more I realized that the story would be hindered by having it in a specific place.

The overall impact of this fic wasn't meant to the plot. It wasn't meant to be a character arc that compelled you, it wasn't meant to even really be about something as fickle as attraction. At it's core, I wanted this to be a story about the very human feeling of wanting to be somewhere else, about missing something that you can't get back and struggling with to accept that time will continue to move on even if you don't want it to.

Tying that to a place almost removed the universality of it, I think. That's why I never alluded to a specific starting station, ending station, route duration, or season. I wanted it to sort of... transcend those things, I guess.

Trains as a Metaphor

I've always really been fond of trains and modes of transport as a metaphor for things like death, purgatory, change, sleep, etc..

In this, I really wanted the train to represented that sort of liminal, purgatory-esque space. I wanted Charles to feel like he was stuck in between something, that he wasn't entirely here or there. In my head, Sebastian was almost a guiding light out of it, directing him away from the place so removed from real life and into somewhere in the present.

I don't want to beat a dead horse, the heavy handed religious imagery did that for me, but I just love the idea of the train being something transformative. Somewhere you go that isn't quite real life, where you can emerge with something you wouldn't have found elsewhere.

What Didn't Fit In

Ok originally, when I still didn't know what I actually wanted this story to BE beside Charles being distraught on a train, I made up entire backstories for him and Sebastian.

Sebastian was meant to be a youngish teacher coming home from a late night at Lewis's house -- they throw grading parties together during finals season, just to make it suck a little bit less :)

Charles owns the bookstore where he saw the little boy. He moved to the city he's in fairly recently, and hasn't really made his own community yet -- he drank alone at the bar that night because he didn't have anyone to call.

Music

FINALLY, in common me fashion, I listened to music on repeat while writing this. Brand New is a band that captures the sort of... empty, aimless feeling that Charles is going through in this story, and I think that the soundtrack really adds a lot!

#is any of that even new info? who knows! #But anways thank you so much for asking #I dont expect anyone to read this one!! it really was a personal project hahahahahah #till the end of the line #sebchal #ask me :) #directors commentary

[betweenthescarletmoon]

The Hollywood Reporter Roundtable Analysis

It was very intriguing for me how Oscar carefully delved into the question he was given by the host Lacey in 38:45, but in a slight surface-level way. Some information he's given in other times filled up a lot of the blanks he left behind in his answer.

First let's go over what they said.

Lacey: Your co-star from Scenes From a Marriage, Jessica Chastain, talked about [how] she had to go to a place that was so dark, and she's not sure she can sort of ever go to these places as an actress again. And I'm curious if you've felt any of that and how your individual, personal sort of boundaries shift with time, with experience, with success.

Oscar: You know, before I'd be like: "what limb do I have to take—cut off to make this scene three percent better?" But I think that it's about inspiration. [...] The whole reason process exists is to inspire, right? And sometimes you don't need a wild process to be inspired by something. Sometimes the words themselves will do it, um, sometimes the character is enough. Sometimes the situation is so harrowing that that's enough to inspire a whole history of a character. And sometimes you gotta: "what did he eat for breakfast? why did he do this?" In order to try, y'know, to inspire some imagination and some sense of truth, right, or some sense of—some emotional, interesting thing.

Oscar [continued]: But boundaries, I think, are becoming more important to me now. And then you have kids. Time is the most valuable commodity. And I think with Scenes From a Marriage, the scenes themselves—that [was what was] so harrowing, not so much the character. But also it mirrored a lot of things in my own life. [...] I'd be reading a bed time story to the young actress that's a five-year-old with a little bunny lamp, and then go home, arrive just in time to sit in the bed with the same exact bunny lamp, somehow, and read a story to my five-year-old— You know, it just starts to fuck with your head, because we're just a human being, so that's a weird situation! [...]

Oscar [yeah he makes up for not talking for almost the entire hour with this question]: After a while, I think it was just all the nature of it, you know? It was right in the height of the pandemic. It was in this factory in the Bronx that had been turned into a studio. It was only like sixty people. And these were very long—almost every shot was like a thirty-minute take. It felt like a weird hybrid between theatre and TV and film. And with someone that I've known for twenty years as well—so all those things created a very uncanny situation, that I think, going back, I probably would have been a little more mindful about. Like, y'know, a little clearer boundaries— And the truth is, even if it wouldn't have been quite as real or good (you know?), I'm okay with—I'm getting better with that idea that—I don't have to cut off a limb just to make it slightly better. It's okay. It's okay.

First off, i just wanna gush over his speech patterns bc I am that all over the place when I try to communicate my thoughts (i actually skipped a lot of his endearing stutters, pet phrases, and filler things he said to grasp at his next message). It's so relatable especially in a group full of people (not to mention legendary actors), because even a guy who looks as confident as him can still sound like he's making a discovery as he speaks and takes you along.

Now on to my analysis of what he said because at first I didn't completely get what he meant!

I have a feeling he's very perfectionistic, and from how he speaks about work in other articles as well as here, he also seems a workaholic. I believe in here he's trying to say that there should be different levels of immersion and hard work to connect with or explore the character instead of always bringing his all and beyond to the job.

Also, scenes from a marriage was as traumatic an experience to film as it was for us to watch (his words after 1:56 on this vid), and Jessica admitted to crying every day for four months during filming. It was a very intimate and emotionally intense series to film especially with such a close friend from Juilliard. So i believe both Oscar and Jessica gave everything they had to make this already overwhelming series feel as real and painful as possible. And since it's a hard setting to feel far removed from (both are married, have kids, have a sex life, could be facing divorce in the future bc of its high rates), it must have hit them even harder. I believe it's not truly an experience to watch sfam without you screaming at, insulting, or feeling immensely sorrowful for the characters because THAT is the reaction they fought hard to get from you. That pain, that anxiety, that tension, that rage, that pity, every emotion you felt that you could barely cope with? All crafted thanks to their extremely immersive and talented performance coupled with their flawless chemistry. But if it feels real to us, through a screen…for them it must've felt even more so. Unbearably more so.

So i believe these experiences, as well as having a family to take care of, and other priorities like time and mental health, have recently made it more important for him to strike a balance in his life. To stop obsessing over creating the perfect role or immersion, or to use these roles to cope with and process real life struggles (as he's admitted to do). I think it's important for him to now connect with real life more, like being a father and a husband, as well as just a human being. Not just an actor or a character.

≿━━━━༺❀༻━━━━≾

Important Excerpts from Articles about escapism and coping through acting (in case you don't feel like reading the last references):

New York Times: After His Mother’s Death, Oscar Isaac Turns to Shakespeare for Solace

“I didn’t know how to process any of this, but this [performing as Hamlet] I knew how to do.”

But [Hamlet is] also a tragedy that asks Mr. Isaac to relive the anguished death of a parent at every performance. In Sam Gold’s rowdy, deconstructionist staging, every time Mr. Isaac mud-wrestles, or lofts a prop skull or performs a mad scene in just a T-shirt and briefs, he seems to be working through his own loss, transforming raw private grief into riveting public performance.

As Mr. Isaac explained, performing has always helped him come to terms with his emotions. “This is how I’m able to function,” he said. “The only way that I’m really able to process stuff is through reflecting it.”

Esquire: The Dream of Oscar Isaac

To be in conversation with Oscar Isaac, who is forty-three, is to talk with someone who has thought deeply about the course of his life—not out of narcissism or vanity but by necessity, a desperate desire to find what feels like solid ground. For him. For his family. For us, whom his art reaches. He has worked to wrest meaning out of his confusions and fears. His effort is ongoing, and his audiences have the privilege of following him in his relentless and shattering performances, in search of the firm footing he lost every time another of his dreams was interrupted.

If superheroes have their capes and their flamethrowers to help them survive, we ordinary humans have our imagination. It has been our shelter for millennia, a way to express and to understand what feels incomprehensible. When it all gets too heavy, sometimes the fragile rope tethering us to solid ground snaps clean, and there is often no refuge sturdy enough to put us back together except in the intimate, private shelter of our minds.

NPR: For Oscar Isaac, life — and acting — is all about impermanence

“It [acting] is a funnel, and it's always been where I go to understand things about life and things that are happening to me. But it's one thing to grieve as a character and one thing to grieve as an actual person. And I think that there's still quite a lot of unresolved stuff there.”

I hope you enjoyed this post! I had to organize all my thoughts in one place because it's so fascinating and complex

#oscar isaac #oscar isaac hernandez estrada #the hollywood reporter #actors roundtable #the dream of oscar isaac #new york times #esquire #maaza mengiste #scenes from a marriage analysis #scenes from a marriage 2021 #scenes from a marriage #sfam #long post. #perfectionism #workaholism #oscar isaac roles #oscar isaac analysis #oscar isaac meta #long post

[icharchivist]

that's fair i hadn't really thought about it like that. i still don't like it but i have heard Lucio seems like he is gradually becoming more conflicted about his position so i am tentatively interested to see where things go with him even though he gets on my nerves (maybe i will change my mind on him eventually who knows--)

Aah glad if it gave you a new perspective!

obviously no need to change how you feel about him either, i still think that like just "his way to behave with Sandalphon makes me uncomfortable" is a perfectly fair comment to make. I see an explanation to why i find it compelling, but it doesn't have to change the idea that it can be uncomfortable to sit though

But yeah, Lucio is genuinely growing more conflicted. I think like, after Bahamut basically put him on mute, he probably doubled down on his devotion because he was left completely alone at the time, and no matter what he did, he couldn't get Bahamut's attention back, so i feel like, suddenly taking a swing in the other direction is something that would come with a lot of personal emotional work. The more Lucio is going to be conflicted about his position the more he has to face that the desperate devotion he's really worked hard on for thousands of years actually caused him more harm than good, and i think it's a delicate balance to walk in a sense.

I think that like.... characters who don't have good social basis (bc isolation in this case), and have to unravel extremely deeply fucked up dynamics inside themselves, will never truly do it fully gracefully. Lucio puts on the air of being in control a lot, but he's lost, and as a result, he's not exactly making the right choices because he's still figuring out what next step he should take, since for once he's operating without someone's control over him.

What i mean by that is that, therefore, it's typically the type of characters who, while attempting to finding themselves and walk away from what they've always known, without having the basis to properly behave around people, who therefore ends up hurting a lot of people as they're trying to figure themselves out.

And i think another way to see Lucio's figuring out process is messy is that when Sariel started to talk about freeing Belial, Lucio did actually come to threaten him about keeping those threats outside of the skyrealms... but the moment he saw Sariel's devotion, this desperate need to understand why someone who has been absent from his life and left him to suffer for a while, would still care for him, he probably saw enough of himself that he couldn't begrudge Sariel after that, and it's why he concludes the Maydays thinking he can't in good conscience free Belial, but he can't stop Sariel from seeking answers either, because Lucio wishes for answers as well as to why he's been abandonned yaknow?

and to me it really shows that Lucio doesn't have a strong moral basis to what he's doing anymore. Bahamut made him doubt so much and now everything is on shaky grounds and he's taking steps forward in the complete dark. His morals are stuff he has to question everytime he moves forward. and as he concludes in the reverie, he needs to learn to not think as a Divine Person, but as someone of the Skies, and the people of the Skies end up winning not in spite of their weaknesses, but thanks to them, because they actually make mistakes, learn from them, discover what other choices they have from them.

So Lucio is basically in a situation where.... pretty much, he's allowing himself to test out free will for the first time, and he's so new at it that everything is new, and therefore, he will hurt people on this way because everything is so new to him.

And "he hurts people" is a totally valid reason to be cold toward him, when he ends up insensitive and hurting others. So it's not like you have to change your mindset either and all. Just that, personally, i think him hurting people comes with the fact he has to accept that not working through a plan someone else planned for him will eventually lead him to walk into situations he was never prepared for and therefore do things all wrong, and at least Lucio is constantly learning now that he's decided to walk this path, and is always ready to put things back into perspective.

So it's really interesting to me.

#ichareply #ichafantalks gbf #anonymous #ichablogging wmtsb

[commaclear]

I wanna talk about Wilbur’s family, mainly Phil. This is gonna be a bit incomprehensible bc I thi k I’m dying rn but I have to talk abt this

For starters, Phil has proven that he adopts kids that are gonna turn into the next top tier god. And I cannot imagine how fucking awful Wilbur feels because he didn’t turn out as good. Especially since Tommy was adopted and Phil now has a kid who he can talk code and all that with. Wilbur probably feels pretty exvluded from his family because everyone’s successful but him.

Imagine how fuckjng shitty it feels to be the emotional one who never got anywhere in life when all your family members have bright futures ahead of them. He probably thinks he’s weighting them down. That probably ain’t helping that whole fuckjng suicidal thing he’s got going on.

Also I wanna mention how Phil is such a dick for making Tommy get involved with the situation while also not allowing Tommy to know why. It’s one thing to drag your kid into a situafoin but a whole other thing to belittle him in the process. He cares about Wilbur and if something is going on he deserves to know just a little bit. They don’t have to outright tell Tommy his older brother figure is suicidal but Phil could’ve at least said something like “Wilbur needs help right now, a little more than before”.

Tommy isn’t a baby. He knows something is wrong. He knows this isn’t a normal thing and everyone is acting weird. and isn’t he literally a foster kid? Tommy probably associates some shit with the adults telling him to fuck off while they discuss things he should be involved in and Wilbur does too.

I know no one knows what to do when they find out someone they care about is suicidal. It’s hard to process and you aren’t thinking straight when you hear it. But I feel like sticking Wilbur with Tommy and saying “don’t ask questions” made Tommy feel excluded and unimportant and it probably made Wilbur feel rather isolated and out of place.

I’ve been there. Having your family in the other room arguing over what to do with you because you can’t be left alone fuckjng sucks. And I’m sure it doesn’t suck any less for Wilbur. He just has to sit there, debating what to do with him as if he’s nothing but a problem that other people have to put up with. He already feels like a burden does he not.

How hard would it have been to maybe include Wilbur in the conversation? Or maybe save the arguing for later.

Also looking back I saw a part where Tommy talks about how he was already relly testing Phil’s patiecen. So it’s pretty clear he’s got some trauma based on that. So good fuckinf job Phil for making Tommy feel like he’s got to worry about messing up right now because you failed to tell him he did nothing wrong.

Ugh Phil. Damn Phil. Phil. Stupid.

-the auackity analysis ankn

Wilbur’s might quit his mediocre office job that he hates, Tommy is building a super advanced robot for an international robotics competition, and Techno just got back from a very successful book tour.... I see no future problems for Wilbur’s self esteem here, no sir everything is a-okay in the Minecraft household

And why would Wilbur feel like a burden? What about this situation would make him feel like an unwanted problem people have to deal with? Once again I see no problems here

Ahaha....

On a less sarcastic note, there is something to be said for not putting the burden of "make sure your brother doesn't kill himself" on a thirteen year old kid, that's the sort of thing that Tommy would spend weeks talking about in therapy as an adult

Admittedly Phil didn’t take the Best approach, but when has he ever?

#anons my beloved #hi thirsty im dad #quackity analysis anon #oh the temptation to tag this as uackity analysis ankn

[onlyjaeyun]

my sweetest love angel baby zadie!!💕 oh my goodness my apologies for being so inactive recently😭 but i made sure to make some time to catch up on CH today since i finally have a day to myself!! i still have to read chap 47 but omg i got through 44-46 this afternoon and!!!!!! where do i even begin omg i guess i’ll start w/ the heartbreak first and then make my way towards the healing🥹

chap 44 absolutely broke me like i could feel every single emotion from sadness, guilt, anger, confusion, frustration, literally everything😭 i was scrolling through some asks and saw that people didn’t agree w/ yn giving in so easily but personally, it made 100% sense that she reacted and processed everything the way she did bc they were inseparable before the incident and it’s hard to just let someone go who you dedicated your time and life to at such a young age. they both have a lot of healing to do and i think it’s great that they get to do it together, and piece the parts that were broken. kind of like them picking up each other’s puzzle pieces and putting them together if that makes sense??

our hoonyn has come such a long way like i genuinely cannot believe we are at that point of the story and CH is almost ending🥺❤️‍🩹 but i am soooo here for lovey dovey hoonyn and their friends losing their fucking minds over the dynamic change with them flirting and calling each other baby in the chats like they are SO CUTE MY BABIES😭🩷

ALSO QUICK LIFE UPDATE SINCE I’VE BEEN MIA FOR SO LONG😭 ur girl is finally cuffed 🥹🥹🥹 we made it official a couple weeks ago and i think i’m falling for this guy even more like he gives me butterflies every single time we hang out and there are also times where we just chill at my place or his and we can sit in comfortable silence while we do our own things. he’s the cutest and sweetest ever zadie he makes me so happy🥺💓

BUT IM SO HAPPY TO FINALLY CHAT W/ YOU AGAIN BABY!! i truly missed your kind and genuine words🫶🏻 i’m glad to see that you’re also taking time for yourself and prioritizing your needs, especially your mental/physical health!! it’s what you deserve baby, pls keep doing that. pls accept all the kisses i’m sending your way to make up for the time i spent away😭 i love you the most my love!! hope this week is as lovely as you are🩷🤍

- 💌

my angel love, my sweetheart, my honey boo 🥺🥺🥺i missed you SO much and am so so so happy you've found some time to check in and give me an update on yourself and life 🥺🤍

first of all, i'm SO so so so so happy for you baby you deserve the best and i'm SO relieved and happy to hear that your man's been treating you so well, you truly deserve that princess treatment so don't ever settle for less!!! i hope it goes smoothly and as good as possible for you two 🥺🤍

i also wanna say thank you for your detailed feednack on the last few chapters of CH, you know your words hold such a great place in my heart and i'm so grateful for all your love and support my love 🥺🤍☁️💫

i've been doing well, especially now that i know you're doing good too baby, please take care of yourself and dont ever worry about checking in, just want you to be okay!!! sending you the biggest kiss ever 🥺🤍

#; mailbox 📬 #; cold hearts