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#because if i get the chance to see Ten again you better believe that i’m going to try my hardest
silvershiningtarot · 4 days
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💋👅💋PAC: What Is Destiny Between You and Your FS in This Lifetime?
Disclaimer: These are all SEVEN PILES. About your Destiny with you and Your FS. Remember this is just a general Reading. So take a chance to breathe in and out and meditate on these SEVEN piles.
Pile 1 🌅 Pile 2 🤭 Pile 3 👋🏽
PILE 4 🙈 Pile 5 🥲 Pile 6 💋
PILE 7 🔮
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Pile 1: The dynamic between you and Your FS seems to be a mutual understanding. I’m sensing that y’all destiny in this lifetime. You two will go on vacation a lot. I hear “tropical island.” someplace on the island you two will go away a lot. Some of you or your spouses are submissive or I'm getting submissive dominance. Again, your spouse can be just a submissive kind of person. There isn’t anything wrong with that honestly. Haha, I can see a few of you being submissive to your FS. I think they bring this side of you that you let your guard down with them. I heard “safe with them”. You are safe with them. I was right! In this lifetime, you two will feel at home with each other. I told you that comfortability. This is part of y’all destiny. Remember this is just the energy for right now. But the two of you will feel right at home together. I'm hearing “This is where the heart belongs.” no matter what you both have an unbreakable bond and an unbreakable connection as well. So I think your FS or you might be Co-dependence on each other. I feel that It can be healthy. So let's see how you guys handle the ups and downs in y'all dynamic. Wow ❕ if some of y’all don't know what Cloud 9 love is then do your research. But wow 😮 you two will make each other very happy. That's crazy I didn't use my tarot cards but I'm seeing in my head the Ten Of Cups. In the beginning, I feel that it's gonna be mutual between you two. I am sensing that a few of you will have a beautiful mutual connection with your FS. There's a mutual feeling with you both. Both of you will know what each other is thinking. You have a telepathic connection. Both of you will finish each other sentences. This is a deep spiritual romance, which means that you two share a deep bond and you two travel to see each other. If some of you have seen y'all FS in y'all dreams before. Wow, your husband/wife will spoil the shit out of you. I see them buying expensive clothes, jewelry, and Teddy 🧸. I can see you crying cutely because maybe nobody ever did that for you but I feel that you two will pamper each other. I think that your FS likes to be pampered. They just like that. Haha 🙈. I believe that A Few of you will be dating your FS quickly. I am hearing in the next two weeks. So two weeks of getting to know each other then bam you guys going on vacation together, ice 🍨 and having a fun time. I believe that you two will move in together. That's part of y’all destiny in this lifetime. Okay, I had a vision that I saw you two on the couch, I can see them I'm a little nervous 😰 about asking you out. I heard them say “I never felt this way before.” for some of you I can see it. Woah, I had another vision of seeing them buying you a bouquet of flowers, and they are walking up to your front porch wearing a suit and tie and telling you how they feel about you. Aww, I keep seeing the bouquet 💐. Beautiful. Both of you will be doing a lot of inner child healing. This dynamic reminds me of Joan and Ellis in a sense. If you guys remember that show Girlfriends. Watch their kind of dynamic. So I believe that you two are meant to heal a lot together. Maybe, you two will watch TV shows both of you used to watch when you were kids. I'm feeling that. Your Spouse is your soulmate whether it is a friend or family but I'm getting a sense that they are soul family and best friend. Look how fast you two got comfortable with each other. Breath Of Fresh Air This is y'all new beginning. You'll feel better and awaken whenever you are around your FS and Vice versa. Wow 😯 a lot of times you two will skip work and missed out a lot of responsibilities. For example: Your husband/wife supposed to work around 9 AM but turn off their alarm clock. I feel that you both are gonna be doing that. Especially, when it comes to business. That’s why I feel like you two will skip out on work and other responsibilities. Oh yeah, manipulative female maybe, they'll be a manipulative Female in your FS life, or y'all lives. I sense that this female could be gaslighting y'all dynamics. Maybe, it could be jealousy.
Maybe, your FS used to sleep with this lady or hang out with them. I'm getting a third-party situation here but it isn't going to last long. In this dynamic, I can see that your FS will be flirting with you or you'll be flirting with them. Aww, how cute is that? They'll be making corny jokes. Finding ways to make you laugh. They'll be doing anything to impress you. Oh yeah, I had a little vision I can see it right now. So I see you two in the park eating ice cream. I can see them making an ice cream joke. They just put their head down while blushing. Haha 😂 I can see it. It's adorable. Rubbing your thighs or rubbing theirs. I feel that you'll notice that your FS likes you. Yes! Some of you will lose your virginity to your FS. But for a Few Of you, I feel that you won't lose faith in this connection with your FS but you'll be going on dates with them I feel that it will be y'all first time on a date. It's going to feel like a breath of fresh air. They'll make this date special. Making romantic getaway dates for you. Some of you'll be close to your FS. Wow, I can see in this lifetime with your FS it is going to be romantic as fuck. I see them taking you out to fancy restaurants and making your day special for you. Both of you are on the right path with each other. I feel that you two will guide each other on the right path. The second you turn left they'll pull you back in that path. Whenever you're feeling down I feel that your FS will fucking uplift you and make sure you don’t fall back down. Oh, I think that you are your FS divine feminine. So that means in my opinion, I believe that this is your Divine Masculine. The fact that divine feminine came out makes me think that you and your FS are divine counterparts. In this life, you are meant to marry your FS. That is part of the destiny between you and them. I sense that in this life no more second chances for that ex of theirs. Intimacy wow, you two will be bonding with each other. I'm hearing “getting to know each other.” I feel a strong sense of that. I feel that for some of you. Few of you, I truly think that you two will be magnetically attracted to each other. The moment you two meet each other. It going to be like bam! I can hear your FS saying “Who is that?” I can see a little scene where FS you were in some art gallery and they were wearing nice black suits and I see you guys walk inside. Then they turn around and just glimpse at you. You glimpse right back at them. It is like a tickle in your eye. If that makes sense. I don't know if you guys have seen those movies when the girls finally meet their one true love. That's how I feel. They are a player but when I see players I see them as if they like players in video games. Like an old-school way. I feel that most of your FS will be committed to you and vice versa. Wow, even a proposal came out for you! Ahh!!! I'm happy about that. So in this lifetime you and your FS. Are meant to be married even if some of you don't believe in marriage then will change your perspective on it. That's what I feel about it. Haha 😂 wow, I’m hearing “they won’t mind.” So they won’t mind you using their credit card to go shopping or whatever you wanna do with it. I feel that for some of you, this is your karmic companion. But for most of you, I feel this is your life partner. Hmm. Both of you have to make a decision. I don't know what it is but that's between you and your FS. You meant to be in business with them. Business collaboration! In this lifetime you are meant to be business with them whatever it is. Your FS is very masculine that doesn't mean they are healthy masculine energy. If that makes sense. So yes, whatever gender you prefer they are masculine or vice versa. I feel that you two will act like marry a couple when you guys hang out with each other. I feel your spouse will invite you over to their house all the time. You won't mind because you like staying over there. I'm hearing “That's your security.” I'm hearing for this type of love language Quality time is important for you two. Which is a good thing.
Remember you two give each other balance. I feel that you two won't lose sight of each other. Like if you need space they'll give you the space and vice versa. They would want to marry you. Maybe, you two will plan a wedding together. In this lifetime you are meant to marry your Spouse. Yay! Maybe, some of you felt in a past life you couldn't marry your FS because of the interruption so now you can. Oh, counterpart! Yes, I'm excited for you guys. So I feel that you are their feminist and they are your masculine or the other way around. Either way, it is fucking awesome to me. I'm happy about that. This is your other half. Yes! Most of you, I think your FS is famously known. It doesn't matter if they are celebrities. But I feel that they are famously known for their community. Everyone knows their name and they have amazing things to say about them if that makes sense. I honestly, feel right now they are fucking around with other chicks or dudes right now. So yeah, some of your FS is fucking around. Yes! They are your ultimate soulmate. I feel that you two were made for each other. That means your soul was created for them and vice versa. I'm happy to deliver that. Honestly. Good luck to you guys and your destiny in this lifetime. Remember energy changes all the time. So if you two had to meet right now this is what you've been going through.
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Pile 2: Your Fs is the type to slow dance and set up the house with candles 🕯️. I definitely, see it happening. I heard “impress you.” I felt that some of you, your FS had a life before you. This means that before you enter their life they'll tell you something about them you probably be shocked or you probably know already about them. Whether it is kids or something else. I can feel that some of y’all spouses don’t have kids. I don’t feel that. But I feel that. See! I think that the universe will leave it up to you. On whatever you decide to do. If your spouse has kids what are you gonna do? Are you going to continue being with them or hit the bricks? Or again, if you have something it is up to your spouse to decide to be with you. Let me just say this as simple as possible. It is up to both of you, free will decide if you wanna be with each other period. Regardless of the circumstances. Whatever if they had a past before you or vice versa. That's the past we’ve all done stupid shit and honestly, no choices that we made were good choices. We live and learn. AWE, the two of you are each other’s perfect match. You equal them and they equal you. If that makes sense. Awe, you've met your perfect match in this lifetime whatever that is. Whichever gender you prefer. Go ahead and be happy forever. So, I feel that some of you will not like them in the beginning. But there is something about them you can't get enough of. That's what I feel. Okay, I don't know if some of you have ever seen The Wizard Of Waverley Place the show. Have you ever seen it? Okay, just imagine if Alex and Justin weren't siblings at all and they met as friends they would get together. What I'm saying is if you guys look on YouTube and watch some videos of them you'll see how Justin and Alex's dynamic is you'll understand the point of this destiny. Anyway, both of you have an odd chemistry. Both of you I feel like you two will argue a lot. Sometimes it will be playful and sometimes it isn't. But I would love to see it. In this lifetime I would love to. Haha 😂 crazy. Your FS dealt with one-sided love before. They've dealt with a lot of bullshit and maybe, that was the life before you came. So they have some secrets you might be like “Oh, fuck.” is that what I'm feeling. Like a Yikes moment. Your FS is your ultimate soulmate for some of you. This is part of your destiny. You had found them. In this lifetime you are meant to be with your match made in heaven. If that makes sense. Now, you two will have an inseparable connection. Can't nothing break you two apart? See! I was right! Most of you I feel that you are going to find your soulmate. Maybe, not your high-vibe soulmate but you are meant to be with your soulmate is gonna make you happy for the rest of your life. I'm getting buddy vibes between you and them. It just means you two will get along very well. They are dreaming about you. I heard “Since they were a child.” they have been dreaming about you since you two were kids. You guys have perfect harmony and you'll see through their bullshit and they'll see through yours. It is like you can't fake it for them. No matter how hard you try to hide your emotions they'll figure it out. I heard them say “You can't hide from me.” I know you will say the same thing to them. They could have a beard. Aww, both of you will be emotionally supportive of each other. They'll be interested in you. I can see you two will be going out on dates a lot. Y'all romance will be blooming. I sense either you or them will try to sabotage this destiny by delaying it. So I felt them working on them pulling you back into their life. Oh yeah, I can see you two hooking up 😍. I feel like some of you I can hear “Ugh, you are such a little devil.” I can hear you say that to them. You'll become an addict to them or it can be vice versa. But you two will be learning and expanding each other's mindset. Or it can be before you two meet you two will be entering a new phase and start preparing for union. So I am happy about that. I think I was right in the beginning.
They are your divine masculine so that means you are their divine feminine. You need to trust your inner knowing (Intuition). You have to trust how you feel. Whoever that it is. Trust that this person is for you. Whoever you are thinking about feeling about or dreaming about. Trust what you feel. I know it is hard we let fear block the opportunities that are right in front of us. I'm sorry for preaching. But I feel like both of you need to trust y'all intuition when you two come into union. I feel even now they are thinking about you now. They do miss you. I feel for this pile. They'll be co-dependent on you. I heard “obsessive.” so it can get unhealthy. That's why you would need space from them. I feel like some of you would need space from them. Few of you, I don't think that you do. But they will miss you a lot whenever you are busy schedule or just hanging out with your friends. They will be missing you. I heard “Their spirit is missing you.” if that makes sense. See! A lot of obstacles you two will be going through together. That's why I say sabotaging. Fuck! There is a lot of blockage between you two. It's like a wall! You are on the other side and they are on the other side of the wall too. See I was right! Crossroad! You two have to decide what you both want in y'all lives. It is like they'll be stuck you probably gonna walk away from them and vice versa. It is like making up your mind. Okay, I think before they had gotten robbed. Like home invasion. But I feel like you two will get into a heated conflict. I'm hearing “It'll be resolved.” you will marry your soulmate for a long time. But I have a feeling that you will have another romantic soulmate that's out there. Your FS will feel like you are a twin flame. So they gonna feel like you two share one soul. I will do a twin flame reading about it. But I felt in my heart that two romantic soulmates would come in. I think that you have to decide which one you will choose. Two romantic people are coming your way. Oh yes, you two will meditate when you wake up in the morning and during the night. It is going to be your two guys' routine. So yeah, in this lifetime you gonna have to choose who. Oh my god, this other romantic soulmate is a Mars-dominant. I'm hearing them say “I always get what I want.” oh yeah! Feel it in my heart this other one isn't going to give up. I keep looking at that card! This other romantic soulmate is a Mars dominant. Oh my god, my question is are you ready for this? You are meant to reconcile with your soulmate again. In this lifetime. Ever one you decide you choose it's your lifetime. I can see a little message. “My beloved, where have you been? I've missed you. I never thought you existed. Forgive me for fucking up. I love you.” Ahhh! I'm screaming. You and your FS are meant to have a boy 👦 in this lifetime. That's part of y'all destiny. You are going to tell your husband/wife or gender fluid you guys are. You're having a boy. Yes! Ahh, I can see that you'll meet them at a dog park. Your dog and theirs will get along. So I felt like some of you will meet your spouse at a dog park. I think this other romantic soulmate is your lesson-learned soulmate🙈. They just meant to teach you a lesson. But they won't give up on you. Oh yeah, your spouse is the type who likes bottom positions better 😘😍😍if you know what I am. They wouldn't mind if they were on the bottom while you were riding them. This relationship between you two it's a never-ending story. Awe, it's a forever in this lifetime. You're meant to be with them. I feel like some of you, your spouse live in the same building as you. A few of you, I noticed that if you decide to move somewhere you'll meet your soulmate in the same building. Either it can be a lesson or romantic. I think that you and your FS are gonna meet through a business meeting. I heard “company.” I don't know what kind of company you'll work at or start working at. I think that whoever does tarot cards or speaks to a tarot reader or psychic reader then your guides would want to speak to you about your person. Your FS
Right now, I think that your FS is trying to connect with their inner child more. So I think that's what some of y'all spirit guides are trying to tell some of you. They are working on healing their inner child. Uhm. Their Ex did something to them that they would rather bury with them for the rest of their lives. I don't know what their Ex did to them. But I hope that they'll tell you real soon. Oh my goodness, they love playing video games. You'll see them playing Mortal Kombat etc. Don't you agree? I sure do. Ohh! For anyone who doesn't believe or doesn't have faith in their connection with whoever. Your FS is telling all of you. As their higher self is telling you don't listen to other readers if you feel like this is your FS then it is yours. Only you have to trust your intuition we as psychic readers are giving y'all our opinions. Trust your instincts. I felt a Few Of You that your FS is slang a big dick. Oh, bust you wide open hahaha😂😂. If some of you out there some weed then this is your FS. This husband of yours will buy you a boutique of weed. Haha 😂 I can see some of y’all pot head happy as hell. Aww, they’ll be the one that will say I love you first. I believe that some of you might say it first but I think in my opinion most of y’all FS is very blunt and brave with their words. They aren’t afraid to speak their mind at all. Which’s good for them. Oh yeah, I feel this other person will come in first in your life and then your FS. But you might be involved with this other person first and this other perosn lifestyle is a bit crazy. I would say. Alright, I felt that some of you may feel in the beginning, that your FS got some cruel intentions because they want to get you pregnant and make you their baby mama. In my opinion, for a few of you I’m not feeling that. Haha 😂 amazing, you two will make like competition tv shows, etc. I can see it happening. Oh my God, this might be very difficult for you. But I feel as though you are going to choose this other husband. So I think that some of you have a two spouse’s I don’t know but you guys have two of them and I don’t know which one you guys are going to decide on in this lifetime. But I feel like your other FS is protecting you spiritually from any dark forces that’s tries to harm you. Oh yeah, you are going to be annoyed with this person and you are going to need some space from them. I’m thinking that I understand this round and round situations. Okay, I feel as though when you are involved with this other guy then let’s just say in the next two weeks your other romantic partner comes in. You are going to be hanging out with them while you are taking space from your other partner. It doesn’t make you a home wrecker. Or anything like that. I feel like you are going to fall in love with this other partner. Alright, they’ll be stalking you on social media. I’m hearing “even now.” So yeah, they are stalking you. I don’t know how but they are. Or you might be stalking them. Aww, the destiny between you and your FS they’ll give you luxurious wedding. They would want to spoil the shit out of you. All they want to do is take care of you. Okay, I feel as some of you, I truly think that this other partner likes to party a lot. So they drink a lot. Tell me what do you think. Honestly, I feel like they don’t want to give up that part of that lifestyle. Okay, I was kind of right in a sense. Whoever guy are thinking about or dreaming about does wants to meet you know. I feel that they’ve gotten readings about you. As who you are and what do you look like? Etc. that’s what I’m feeling like. Yes, in this lifetime both of you are meant to help each other spiritual. You two are meant to ascend with each other. That’s fucking amazing to me. I am hearing you say “I’ve made the right choice. So whatever you decide in this life with your partners you are going to feel you’ve made a great choice. This is what you two remind me of. The dynamic, connection of the whole scenario.
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Pile 3: In the beginning, I honestly feels like it will be on and off between you both. I figure one of you might be detached. Doesn’t want to be in a relationship or looking for one. Which I understand. In a sense I do. I figure that you might be annoyed with your FS. I can see a little imagine right now you’ve got annoyed with your FS maybe, there’s something they say to you or you’ve might of heard of. But you and Your FS in this lifetime is destined to a romance connection. I heard “fall In Love 🥰” I think in my opinion, you’re going to fall in love with them instantly. Don’t feel ashamed about it or anything. You’ve got what’ve been manifesting for a long time. I truly do feel that way. I was right. Praying 🙏🏾 the both of you were praying for someone come into your life that you can just fall in love. Not someone who’s gonna treat you like shit or whatever. But I believe as though. I feel that some of you will be ghosting on your FS meaning detached from them. That’s what I feel for some of you. A few of you, I think that your FS will be the one that doesn’t know how to make up their mind. One minute it’s cool next minute it isn’t. You’re going to be round and round with them. Like that Selena Gomez-round and round. That’s song I’ve heard in my head when I thought of this situation. But this is just beginning. I think that you two are doing some spell love or talking to other psychic readers who are doing spell works for you to bring in your lover. In my opinion, it isn’t bad. The both of you are meant to create a family together in this lifetime. You're meant to build a future with them. That could even mean today, tomorrow, or months from now. That depends on you and your FS. We all build our future in our own way. Honestly, feel as though you two are going to do those old-school photos. Make a lot of memories together. I think that whenever you guys take pictures you won't leave them on your phone you are going to print them out. I have a feeling this pile feels like an old-century life memory. I don't know what it is but that's what I'm getting. Having picture frames 🔲 and hanging pictures up on the walls, rooms, living room, and even through your Spouse office. Or yours. If that makes sense. You'll know your spiritual gift. Or I have a sense that your gifts are going to be activated. Whether or not you decide to activate them yourself. But you'll be aligned with your gifts. I can see that you may have a special place where you go to find your peace. Maybe, on a rock 🪨 or somewhere you find your sanctuary. I feel that you two might've done something you've been regretting. Or they did. So when I saw this card Massive Regrets I thought that they had done something that’s like “FUCK! I fucked up.” I can see them tapping their head like Fuck fuck fuck!! I feel as though in this lifetime your FS used to cope with drugs. I won't go any further than that but they got themselves into some deep depression. It does fucking sucks. Alright, either you or your Fs will be dealing with some crazy ex. This ex is obsessed with you or them. They'll be buying an apartment next door to them. To check to see what are up to. Probably stalking their social media. Or is your ex stalking your media? I'm hearing this ex “Let’s see what are you up to.” Hmm. This ex won't let the past go. Be careful because you might have to deal with them in this lifetime. I feel like that's part of y'all destiny in this lifetime. Don't get me wrong you can change the course of your destiny period. Aww, I think that your FS will be sending you love messages. Oh My God, I think your Spouse isn't afraid of what they send you. I think they are going to show you what they send you. I can hear them say “Here look at what I sent you.” you'll cozy up with them. Both of you are going to read the message that they send you. Awe I can see them kissing your forehead. This FS is very sweetheart. But we will go into the depths of this destiny. You are their Divine Feminine. You are their other half. They've been searching for you. I'm not saying this or it is
True about this but why did I feel like some of y'all spouses could be Chris Brown lol 😆 I mean if y'all are then good! But I just saw him in my head. But anyway, yeah, you are their divine feminine. So that means your FS is your Divine Masculine. What a perfect match. Right now, I feel like you two are feeling under pressure because you two think that you are running out of time. Which isn't true. Which isn't true at all. You're not running out of time. Y'all time isn't wasted. Honestly, time doesn't exist. You can meet your FS anytime. Yes, you have to go through hardship with other people but sometimes they come in when they come in. This is a type of chemistry or a connection it's like love and hate between you and your FS. I don't sense that you fucking hate them but this reminds me of that show Bridgerton. When Anthony couldn't stand Kate he fell in love with her. If some of you don't know about that show. I think I can send you a link to their dynamic on YouTube. This is what I feel like you do them and they do to you. Oh yeah, the both of you will be ending a lot of drama, and losses, and finally finished the past. I'm hearing “the ending.” I feel like your FS is going through a mental breakdown because of this crazy psycho ex. I think they regret it. Either you or your Fs may have a sex addiction. But I don't sense a bad habit. I am hearing “self-control.” Oh yeah, see! I was right! Both of you will say goodbye 👋 to the past, the exes, and old habits of ways. When you and Your Fs get into a relationship it is going to flourish. I have a sense of “fast-paced.” with some of you. But for a few of you, I'm sensing more “slow-paced.” either way that's what I'm getting from it. Ahh! I see that the two of you will be performing together. Whether it would be on stage, perform an art gallery, etc. No matter what you two will be sharing the stage. Oh my goodness, you two will share an everlasting first-time kiss. I can see it. It is a moment that you two will share. Well, I see that you'll be marrying your high-vibe soulmate in this lifetime. No wonder I was picking so many romantic vibes. It's so calm and cool. So your Fs will stalk you on your IG page or whatever social media you do have they’ll stalk you. I'm hearing them say “Eh, just keepin’ an eye out”. In a sense, it's like they wanna protect you sort of way. I hope that made sense. In the beginning, it might start as a situationship. So you and Your Fs could be in a situationship in the beginning. Or in my opinion, dealt with one. This connection leads you both to find each other again. Which is so romantic. I'm getting such a dreamy vibe. Even if some of you, may think that “Oh, it's a situationship.” no matter what it'll never feel that way with you. I sense more you both will be quick to get out of that situationship and start a relationship. If that makes sense. Alright, again, this reminds me of pile 2. I have a feeling that you may meet two people in this lifetime. One is your FS and the other one could be your FS as well. So I have a feeling when this other person sees you. Oh my lord, they are going to tell their friends about you. I heard this other person say “I saw an angel.” Yeah, awe sounds sweet but I don't think 🤔… sigh, this will take a brief moment. Oh wow, I have a feeling that something might happen. I don't know what that is. I can see that face you might make. That fucking “Yikes face” 😬. Okay, some of their asshole co-workers will be talking shit about you. Like “bitch Bye”. Haha 😂 I'm sorry I was in my moment. Anyways, they will defend you. I'm hearing them right now saying “It doesn't matter how the fuck we got together it's none of y'all fucking business.” holy shit! I'm scared to piss this FS. I'm telling you they don't play around at all. I can feel them being aggressive towards people. Including their co-workers. They'll shut that shit down fast. You may meet them at a festival party with your friends or theirs. Oh my goodness, haha 😂 you two will make a reality TV show. No drama I don't feel. But like competition shows.
Other games show. Oh yeah, I can see it happening. I believe right after the meeting you are going to get their phone number. They'll give it to you. Oh. I can see you guys blushing about it. It is so cute. You remind me of a high school girly girl. Maybe, that's my energy. Lol 😆 Alright, I believe that someone threatens your FS in this part of the industry that's why they back away. Somebody threatened your FS that's why they probably don't do what they love to do anymore. Maybe, painting, music, etc. Whatever that is somebody did some shady shit. Okay, see! Yeah, I was right! I told you that you guys will be the ones who will be making the “Yikes” faces. Because you've already fallen in love with your Fs. Since the moment you met them and they met you. Isn't that wonderful? So you may have to hurt this other person's feelings. Oh my god, I don't wanna cry but sometimes shit like that happens. Oh damn, that's hurtful. I've heard my thoughts like “Maybe, they should've made it in time.” Oh dang, bad thought bad thought. 😂😂. So when you two meet each other. The second you guys lock eyes with each other. Bam, you both knew it was meant to happen. This other person doesn't talk to their family or friends. They probably have one close friend. I don't know why but I feel slightly close to this pile. Maybe, a certain message is in there. For me. Alright, they’ll be the ones paying other artists to work with you. Whether you wanna be an actor/actress, Writer, etc. They'll be the ones paying for it. I've heard them say “Whatever you make I make.” I don't know why maybe, this is my vibe, or some of y'all. But I'm heavily feeling like some of y'all might be Chris Brown's wifey here. But that's what I'm feeling like. But anyway, your Fs are exploring their sexuality. Ha, I’ve heard that they have been judged by people. That's lame to me. So they secretly explore their sexuality. In my opinion, so the fuck what. Hmm… your spirit guide is calling you to speak to them about your person. So check in with your guides. So yeah, you and your FS are going through the same situation. Whatever you are going through they are going through a similar situation. 🙈🙈. Yes, a lot of people will support your relationship with your FS. Don't matter what happened. In the past with them. People are going to support this relationship this connection. They'll love seeing you two together. You might meet them through a business meeting. I swear! I don't know what it is but some of y'all meeting y'all crushes or FS through an industry. This is the kind of vibe I'm picking up heavily. Yes! Turn on 🤭🤤🤤. A few of you, your Fs know how to grind their body. They know how to move their body. So imagine in bed🤤🤤. Oh, sexy. I've heard a sex song for them haha. They'll admit to you about their past but they feel like you won't look at them the same anymore. Now whatever your FS tells you. I've heard my guides say “Don't freak out.” don't show them an eww expression because they'll close off from you. It's okay to give your opinion but don't be rude about it or judge them. They are trying to connect with their inner child. Whoever does music whether you are serious about it or not. The two of you will make hit-the-chart music. So I feel like some of you are meant to make music. For some of you, whether you are a rapper, singer, or guitar player. You meant to be in the chart. Or I have a feeling they are meant to help you with your career. Also, in this lifetime you two are meant to be in a partnership. This destiny between you and your FS is all about partnership. There will be certain people who don't want you guys together. I feel like they already call your Fs names. So they'll be calling you stupid for being with them. I'm telling you it’s because of their past. I'm hearing them say “They called me the worst names in the world.” so yeah, they called them bad names. They were going through a stressful evening but it's all better now. I feel that they own a billion-dollar company. They didn't use protection while they were sleeping with their ex.
No worries, I honestly feel like they didn't catch anything. So again, your Fs have some secrets. What's that saying “Skeletons in their closet.” they are a video game freak. They love video games. Play play. They are sending you messages, signs, and synchronicities too. Pay close attention. I can hear them say “I know you are sending message to me. Just know I am catching them.” So they know that you’ve been sending messages from the universe through their dreams. Don't think they aren't listening they are. I believe they are. You are part of their destiny. So in the next couple of months, you are going to meet your Fs. I heard “this year”. So many of you are meeting your FS this year. I am feeling like. Good to y'all. Aww, they'll go all out for you on Valentine's Day🕯. They painted the room red and roses on the wall. Aww, what a dream to be.
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Pile 4: Alright, one of their teammates will be spreading lies to your ear about them and vice versa. They can see you two fighting against each other. I feel like in my opinion, don't listen to them. Whatever their teammate saying about you to them don't listen to them. Oh yeah, your Fs have some bad friends around them. They truly do if their teammate spreads lies about you to them. Alrighty, I believe that you two have to deal with karmic partners before coming into union for some of you. This is your soulmate and both of you are soulmates. I feel in my gut that the both of you have a lot of things that you two need to deal with. So I think that one of their family member or parents isn't going to like you because you're too young for them. I can hear them say “You're too young for them.” they are going to feel like you have no kind of responsibility. In my opinion, who gives a shit about it. They've gotten robbed before. Someone invaded their home. Oh, yeah, that's shit fucking sucks. I’m sorry about that with them. Your FS could be a Virgo sun and they are practical and they like to use big words. I can feel like some of you could be like “Uhm, that's unnecessary.” They are your Divine Masculine so again, they are your divine counterpart. I felt as though they were a little wounded right now. I felt as though some of you were spiritual in your way. I have a feeling that they'll be dropping their religion. I feel like certain things won't make sense. In this lifetime they'll help you learn how to budget and save up your money so you won't be spending so much of it. If that makes sense. In A past life, I've believed that you were a Queen and you were a well-known Queen. I’m hearing you were loved. I think you probably got tired of everyone in your face and craving for something more. What's out there for me? Just me. That is what I'm feeling for you. You've found your spouse on this island and they were smart and they took you on a different adventure. I see that your people have found you and took you back home. I have a strong feeling that you were sad. I don't think that you told your FS who you were to keep that life a secret. You didn't want anybody to know. But both of you fell in love with each other. Since the moment you two laid eyes on each other. I had a little vision in my head that they were building something. Man! They had a nice body but you were like “Who's that guy?” haha. I think that in this lifetime it will be the same feeling as they did here. They feel a bit guilty for doing something that they shouldn't done. I don't feel like they forgive themselves. I felt as though they were excited to meet you. I've heard them say “I hear stories about you.” so I feel as though they hearing stories about you. I think they probably seeing a psychic. But they are having strong feelings about you. For some of you. You know what couple I'm feeling like this pile is. I'll send the link 👇🏾below. These couple I'm seeing. That's how I felt in past life between you two. So many people got between you two. Your lifestyle and theirs. In this lifetime what's part of y'all destiny is that they'll offer you their generosity by helping you with your career. Whatever that career is they'll help you. I can feel it. There is a lot of space in this connection between you and them. There's a lot of it. I can see you being like “I'm done with you. I need some space for right now.” I'm hearing “They won't be alright with it.” Maybe, they won't like the space at all. But at the end of the day make it work for you. So it is okay to need space from your person. Alright, other readers will say that you will get bored with your FS in this lifetime. I can see that you'll make it work with them. So if other readers say that you might be unhappy with them. Then you are going to stay with your Spouse regardless. Everything is free will. A lot of their fans will love your style and follow you on your social media Check what you are doing. But you gotta be a little bit careful. They might be a little bit nosy. So watch out. Just saying
Both of you are on a spiritual journey. You two are on it in this lifetime. I’m sensing that you two were meant to be spiritually awakening. More self-awareness. It is going to take them a minute for them to tell you that they like you. I've heard them say “I gotta make the move.” so what's going to encourage them is that they see you going out with someone else. This is like to me in my opinion, wow dude! Lol 😆. Anyways, they'll be telling you that you are playing games with them. And they'll feel a little bit worried that you won't like them anymore. Your FS will be taking accountability for their mistakes whenever they are arguing with you. In this lifetime you two are going to take accountability for the mistakes you two say to each other. Not every relationship is magical. But if it is worth the battle with your partner. Awe, every time you two see each other, both of you yell loudly and jump for joy. I can see you two seeing each other and saying “Hey!!”. If you guys still doing tarot cards they'll ask you to do their energy. Both of you are very competitive as hell. Whenever you two play video games I can see it. This reminds me of a couple. So I'm gonna put it. These are couples that you two remind me of in a sense of this connection. I am sensing private too. Whenever you two argue one of you will shut down and doesn't say anything. I sense both of you. I feel both of you don't like confrontation. Whenever you two argue I can sense an apology quickly. Both of you will teach each other how to protect each other's energies from anyone who doesn't have good intentions. So, I think that some of y'all Spouse is a bit fucked up. So if you end up with your Spouse then you can get into some deep shit. They are gonna trigger you it's because you have some things that you need to face. That happens. There are a lot of positive vibes in this connection you have to believe it. Yes, every relationship has its ups and downs. You'll be the dominant one in bed. So you'll dominate them in bed. They'll like that. You'll be spanking them and damm! I can see a purple light and whenever that light turns on they know what that means. In your destiny, in this lifetime your fears are blocking you from what you need to see. I feel like whatever is blocking you, take a step back and realize what are you scared of. They'll help you build up your label and bring it like other artists. Whatever kind of label you are doing do it! Some of you, I feel like you will marry your Twin Flame in this lifetime. It all depends on you two. Okay, I feel a few of you, got to be careful. Not a lot of people isn’t going to like you two being together for a reason. I’m gonna address this situation. I know some of you have celebrity twin flames and soulmates. Most of you, don’t. It is fine. Just wanna address that. Anyway, this connection will help you find yourself. I’m hearing “self-love” you’re gonna be learning a lot about yourself through this connection. They’ll ask you that “Will you go out to lunch with me?” They’ll take you out for lunch. Oh yeah, they gonna love taking you out to diners, restaurant, and lunch, etc. I can see them doing that all the time. But this connection involves marriage but it all depends on the two of you. I said it before. In this lifetime all the piles both of you make y’all destiny on whatever that is to be. You want happiness then you are going to get happiness. The person you are dreaming about. Does have to do with your soul mission. Both of you have a lot to create together. I can see it happening. Aww, both of you will have matching tattoos together. It is adorable. I can see it happening. This other spouse doesn't talk to their family. I was right. I feel as though, some of you are marrying your twin flame, and most of you marrying their soulmate. Or it can be the other way around. But I feel like there might be two soulmates and a twin flame that may come in. But then again, I can be overly Exaggerating things. Okay, just feel that whenever you are arguing with your spouse there will be certain issues that you two
Can't over this situation. You two may have to agree or disagree. That's just how energy is for now. Okay, whatever you've done in the past is affecting your future. Remember what I said that your fear is blocking what you aren't seeing. So you have to take accountability. They have been sheltered their whole life. It can be the mindset. So I'm hearing that part of y'all destiny is to get out of y’all comfort zone. Your divine masculine is sending you messages, Signs, and Sync. You need to pay close attention. If some of you are divine feminine then pay close attention to dreams. They are important. Okay, they are sort of immature and you'll check them on it. But they'll get defensive on you. Make sure to always hold your ground no matter what. You're gonna stop them from doing something stupid. I dont know what that is but it is something. They'll need to trust how they feel and go with the flow. Whenever you see them back off from you it's because they don't trust themsleves. I’m seeing like Belle and Edward dynamic as well. Alright, these interviewers will bring up their past in front of you. I think that's where you'll stop them from doing something that is fucking stupid as shit. Ahh! I’m dead-ass gaggin’ right now. Unpleasant surprised 😮 you two will have a baby GIRL! In this lifetime you and your Fs are having a baby girl. How do you feel about that? Very cute. Okay, I think that the two of you will get into some heated conflicts There'll be times that you have to walk away from them and vice versa. Honestly, I feel that way. Because we all say things in the heat of the moment. For some of you, this is your romantic partner's short-term. If you two want to still work it out then that's up to you. If not then it's okay to move forward with your life. Maybe, some of you will feel uncomfortable doing this but they'll take you where they took their ex on vacation at. Just to make new memories with you. They want to share that love with you. I have a sense that your FS doesn't have bad intentions but they wanna reconnect with new memories with someone, they feel as though they can spend the rest of their life with. That's what strongly what I strongly feel like. Alright, they'll notice that you have a commitment phobia. If some of you guys are like that then they'll notice that quick. Aww, I feel this even now I do. But they are writing their thoughts about you. In their journal. I feel as though you are doing the same thing. So guess what, you two are manifesting each other. Aww, so fucking sweet isn’t it.
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Pile 5: Alrighty, It seems that a lot of Hollywood people would tell you not to take that chance with your FS. I don't know why. But I think some of these people don't like your Spouse. Hmm, I have a feeling that your Spouse has a big mouth or it is because they had a past Ex in that type of industry. So again, be careful who you date. But in my opinion, if you fall in with your FS who had a bad past so the fuck what. That shit got nothing to do with your feeling with him. Period. So yeah, in this destiny between you and Your Fs will come at them rudely. I hope some of you have tough skin. These bastard Hollywood fuckers are snakes. I can see your FS saying “It’s okay, I am used to it.” Again, these Hollywood fuckers are bullies. So This is part of y'all destiny in this lifetime. Anyway, when they meet you, I think that they'll tell you when you get into a relationship with them. They'll tell you their secret. They masturbate when they fantasize about you. I've heard “every time.” so every time they fantasize about you they masturbate. I think that they saw a psychic and they told your FS to masturbate so they can bring you into their life. Sex magic does work that way. Aww, In this lifetime I feel like some of you, have some FS Who is a kind-hearted spirit. They are a nice person it is hard for them to stay mad. That doesn't mean using that shit for an advantage. But it is hard for them to stay mad. So whenever you two get into an argument they'll get upset and they'll walk away from you and they'll come back and tell you why they did what they did. Oh yeah! Both of you will take accountability for what you two said to one another. Good! That's good. I'm glad you two are going to do that in this lifetime. Oh, I can see that one of you might shut down all day Either you or they won't say anything all day. I have a feeling it is your FS since they are going to walk away and won't say anything. I think that they don’t like yelling. It seems like their reputation can affect you in some deep shit. Maybe, it will affect your career. If you decide to go with them. Some people in Hollywood won't work with you. Oh yeah, see! Both of you will trigger each other to the limit. But it is meant to heal you and them. But I noticed that again, some of your FS will walk away from you. They'll need a day away from you. It will make you sad. Yes! Haha 😂 you won't get along with your FS co-workers. Including their business clients. Hmm, that's some crazy shit. I don't sense that you'll be jealous but I do see that you'll pick up on some of their energies. Aww, every time you two see each other it is always a joy with you both. I can see you two jump into each other’s arms. Yeah, both of you yell at each other. Not like yelling but yelling as Hiiii baby. Then jump into each other's arms. Both of you are like best friends. Okay, in the beginning, both of you will start as friends. Even friends argue. So they are your homie but they would want to take it further with you. I think some of you might be in a relationship with someone else while your friend is with your FS. But most of you would want to take that road with them but I think that you decide to stay their friend. They'll help you love yourself more. As to where what they see in you. You'll start to put into yourself. Wow isn't that so beautiful? I can see it happening. You'll start to build your confidence. I think that you’ll take their advice too. Oh yeah, it seems that whenever you are around your FS your femininity will start to kick in. Aww, I see that you might be doing a lot of self-care and getting your hair done. Doing things makes you sexy. If that makes sense. They love wearing their suit and tie. Every time you see them they always have a business suit on. I can see you say “Is that all you wear?” which isn’t true but that's just how they dress. Oh yeah, this FS doesn't fucking play at all. I mean damn! I can see that they'll call it quits whenever you are acting immature or too young. Well, I should say petty. Oh yeah, some of y'all FS don't fucking play. I mean damn!
Whenever they see something is wrong I'm hearing “workout” they’ll walk away from you if they don't see you putting in the effort. Aww, I believe when you first enter the room you fucking blow their mind away. Oh my goodness, isn't that so beautiful? They'll buy you roses and all kinds of flowers. I think that whenever you two Get into some kind of conflict they'll want to work it out with you. I feel like in this lifetime they wanna work it out with you. I think in past lives you two didn’t work it out. Oh my God! Haha 😂 this is fucking wow. You'll hide your first pregnancy from the world. You won't tell anyone about your pregnancy. Honestly, for the sake of you and your child's health yeah, I don't blame you. Keep all your pregnancies to yourself. Okay, this connection between you and your FS is a lot of round-and-round. I think that there will be times when you two will need space. I have a sense that this might be your soulmate but a difficult one. I mean no soulmates are easy but some of them are calm. But this one with you two oh my goodness, I can tell that you two will be dizzy. So yeah, either you or them will walk away from each other. I don't think that you two will break up. I don't think that way. But space will be needed in this rollercoaster. Geez. Aww, they believe that you have such a beautiful voice. It is beautiful💋😱. I can hear them say “Wow, you are magical. Your voice is like a siren. Such a mermaid 🧜‍♀️.” Yikes 😬😬. They won't satisfy you in the bedroom. Okay, maybe, that's why you two are going through some issues. Oh my goodness, maybe they like to do missionary all the time. Damn! I don't like it when this call comes out but they do. See! They feel like you are being a bit distant from them. See! Communication is very important. So they are going to know what's going on with you. Aww, you'll be impressed by them the way how they speak to you. Very gentlemanly vibes. But they aren't that good in bed with you. I think you may think that they are boring in bed. Wow 😮 I'm sorry 💔. Aww, that's a song I've heard in my head too. That's how they feel about you. It was like love at first sight for them. Oh yeah, you'll take some space away from your FS but they'll still text you and send you positive vibes your way. Aww, what a fucking sweetheart? No matter what they will always make sure your day is positive and loved. Are you willing to take this step with your true love? Will you though? Oh my God, I love you guys. This is like ❤️ here. In this lifetime what’s apart of y'all destiny is that you two Will decide to choose each other in this lifetime. No matter who else comes in😁. Both of you will decide to choose one another. This reminds me of the movie The New Sequel of the Little Mermaid. I'll send a video. Here. This is how your connection is. I truly do feel that way. This destiny between You and your FS Will catch you by surprise. This love between you and Them is caught off guard. Like “Oh wow.” it's beautiful. I know that some of your FS can't satisfy You in bed which I think in my opinion, they just might. They just might surprise you in bed. But anyway, you two have been manifesting this love for a long time. Now you finally got it. It came to you. In the beginning, both of you are going to be arguing when you two first meet. Oh my goodness, your love doesn't stop there both of you were probably Romeo and Juliet in a past life before. So your love with them is ancient. I know some of you don't remember but it does go way back. I think some of your FS is your twin flame and for most of you, I believe your FS is a soulmate. For some of you, I think that your Twin Flame is fighting back against this other husband of yours. So, this might be a decision you might have to make. Haha 😂 I honestly, believe that is how some of y'all FS is now. I feel that your FS is going to be completely possessive and obsessed with you. This is part of y'all destiny in this lifetime. Both of you will be forgetting about y'all responsibilities and staying home. They trust you and ONLY you. They trust you.
You might be relocating where your person lived. They are moving forward with their life and making better decisions for themselves. That’s good. Hmm 🤔 there are some kind of suspicious things about your FS business. I don’t know what that is but I won’t go any further than that. Oh yeah, it seems that you and your FS will be making out a lot. 💋💋💋💋💋💋. I can hear 👂 one of y'all friends “Where did they go?” oh yeah, you two making out that's for sure. You two like to be alone. In this lifetime you two were meant to marry each other. I think you've tried to marry them in a past life but that shit got fucked up. I can strongly feel that. But you meant to have kids with them. GASP! Oh shit! Didn't it say that your first pregnancy is gonna be private? Bam! See that confirmation. Okay, didn't I say some of your FS is your Twin Flame, and for Most of you this is your soulmate? Look at that this soulmate is part of your high-vibe soulmate journey. They are meant to lead you too. I believe that's part of their destiny with you. Okay, this is kinda lame to me. But they might be in a relationship while they are hanging out with you. So they have feelings for you. I've heard “proudly.” so They Proudly have feelings for you. They could be bald or shave their head bald 🦲. Or cut their hair short. Things can change. See! For some of you, I feel that you are marrying your Twin Flame in this lifetime. This fucking twin has a lot to do with your past life. I don't know what it is but it is something. Hmm, I think right now as we speak something is keeping you and your FS away from each other. Yikes 😬😬. In my opinion, be careful with whom you share your readings too especially if some of you have celebrity husbands or wives. Be careful. Yes, your FS is older than you. I honestly, feel that way. But I feel like there is a slight chance that they can be a little bit younger than you. I don't sense hella younger but young. I sense early 20’s like 23 or 24.
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Pile 6: In this lifetime, I have a sense that both of you will forget about y'all responsibilities. I have a sense that you may say “Oh, another time.” and then you gonna keep doing it. It is like every time. So you may have to be a bit careful especially, if it is work. I can tell that you'd like to stay home with them. Oh yeah, I can tell that this FS will be very hasty with you. So your FS is going to be completely possessive and obsessive of you. I noticed that they might be unhealthy. The destiny between you and them. Your FS is gonna be completely possessive over you. I have a strong feeling that this FS isn't playing at all. I am getting a rush vibe from them. They'll say yes to you. For example “Do you want to go out?” FS: “Yes”. Like they are so with the speed with you. Anyway, they could be thin. Like medium size. Right now they are a bit jaded because of what they are going through at the moment. So their mind isn't clear. Alright, I think that when you meet your FS you might've thought to yourself, do you want to go down this road with them? I can see you walking back and forth with this. The reason why I said that is because I won't lie to you, your FS might ask you for your number when they meet you. Like before you leave the building. They'll ask you out of hangout with them. I've heard them say “I see what I want and I'll take it.” so this kind of FS knows what they want. They aren't afraid to take what is theirs. Your Twin Flame is fighting back against your other FS so you two won't meet. I have a feeling that for this Pile. This is your twin flame period. This love between you and your Twin Flame is surprising. I heard “forbidden love”. I felt that certain people don't want you two together. It is going to happen unexpectedly. I know for this one it is tough as shit! Especially, if you are dealing with a twin flame. But I have a feeling that this is part of y'all destiny you are meant to be with your twin flame in this lifetime romantically. You may get into an argument with them at the first meeting. I heard “approving a point.” so they might prove you wrong about them. Maybe, you have some kind of expectation about this twin of yours or their lifestyle. Then BAM! They shut you up. Oh yeah, I feel like this twin is confident about their intuition about you. Whew! So here is their message to you. “Trust me, believe me when I say I am the man you've been thinking and dreaming about. I know it has been a minute since you saw my face but I am always fucking yours. You can bet your sweet ass I'm yours. You may not think so today or tomorrow but it'll come.” Damn, I since a lot of confident vibes from this twin flame. Wow. Anyway, I sense that you two won't give up on each other. No, you won't. Maybe, some of you don't believe in your twin flame connection anymore or just hiding it. But this is part of your destiny with them. You can change different directions but you cannot change certain things in your soul contract with them. You can be 50 years old you'll still have to go down that road or in next life you may have to do it with them but just in a different form of yourself. See! Yeah, you're marrying your Twin Flame 🔥 in this lifetime. So again, your FS is your twin. They have a lot I mean A lot to do with you in the past life. I don't know what that is but if you want a personal reading on that. Here is my link. Anyway, so they might be in a relationship when you meet them. I have a strong sense that when you do meet them they aren't in a relationship with their person. I've heard “sleeping with them”. Your FS could have a darker skin tone. They aren't too light or brown skin but dark brown or dark. Aww, this dynamic between you and them is like Mavis and Johnny. Aww. Let me show you guys a video. Your relationship dynamic reminds me of them two. It's like once you two are alone with one another you see a whole different side of your Twin. Okay, your twin flame is your Divine Feminine. So if some of you are divine Masculine then you are meeting your other half. Which is your Divine Feminine.
Again, they have a lot to do with you in this past life. I don't know what it is but it is something. Huge! It is like something very important you cannot ignore. You can't. At the moment they are mentoring someone else right now. I can see another message they wanna tell you. “Hey, You! Why are you doubting yourself? Did I hear you losing faith? Huh! I wonder why. You are a fucking beautiful Angel 😇. Heaven ain't got nothing on you. You were made to lead for yourself and us. You and I are a team. Trust me, I know it's hard for now. But You will have everything you want including me. Tell me do you believe? I wish I could give you something to believe. But no worries I hope this message helps you.” Wow, they don't like it when you doubt yourself. They see you as perfect. I see you helping your community out. Especially, if your community is struggling you are going to help the struggle. Proud of you. 🙏🏾💋They have an ego problem. Their head is fucking huge so you know that people kiss their asses. But you ain't gonna do that. So of course they are going to be saying “Do you know who I am?” Like ewe, I don't care who you are. Make sure you check them on it. Uhm, they are still a little bitter over their ex. They are trying to move on from it. But this fucking Ex must have hurt your Twin. Oh shit, I wish this card didn't come out. But their ex did something to your Fs they would rather bury it. I'm sorry about that. Oh no! That shit made me mad 😡 this is very bleh to me. Okay, this is none of anyone's business. But oh well, they weren't using protection while they were sleeping with their ex. Hmm.. It seems like spiritually your Fs warning you about this new guy that's coming into your life. That's why they are protecting you even now when a new guy comes into your life. So if you are in a relationship with someone else right now. I feel like your Twin Flame is telling you something about this new guy. So be careful and smart. Alright, I feel like you'll be the one that might start shit with them. I don't think you are a drama starter. Bam! Both of you will have y'all victory together. It is going to feel like a FINALLY! You two finally made it to the end. Through all the ups and downs might as well just finish the race. So that's what happens. I think that you and your Fs have a lot of lessons to learn together in this lifetime. This is part of y'all destiny. I know it feels like a big fucking UGH! But honestly, you don't want things that are too easy. You would want a balance. A lot of people will support you guys' relationship. Oh yeah, it seems like your friend is gonna catch you two having sex in the bathroom. Oh Whew! Dang! Anyway, they currently aren't feeling themselves right now. So they probably going through some kind of healing process right now. This relationship between you and your Fs will bring a lot of people together in harmony. I sense that a lot of people would want y'all relationship. I can tell that they would. I just think that some of y'all Fs are going through some hard lessons with themselves. If you have been dreaming about your Fs lately or you've been dreaming of them for a long time. Then they have something to do with you on your journey. Both of you are meant to create something together. Hmmm. I told you that they are going through something personal. So I think right now they trying to figure out whether or not to cut this friend off. Since they have known this friend for a very long time. Both of you grew up kind of “tough love” in the household so I feel that both of you have this survival mentality. This connection involves marriage. But it all depends on you two. So it is up to you and your Fs if you two decide to take it further down the line. If that makes sense. Oh yeah, so your FS has some unhealthy habits. To where they'll punch someone in the face if they see talking to someone else. I have a huge sense that your Fs have some huge trust issues. Remember what I said earlier that they can quickly be obsessed with you. Then your Fs reminds me of an old soap TV show. Called the
Bold and The Beautiful. Deacon and Sheila. If you guys don't know these characters there is a link below you should check it out. I have a feeling that your Fs have a dark side that they tap into a lot. I don't know what it is but they got this high-ass adrenaline. I can feel it. You give them this excitement in their life. They have been looking for. I've heard “mystery”. Oh yeah, both of you will meet at a festival party whether you are performing or hanging out with friends. But you are going to meet them there. I heard “unexpected surprise.” it is going to happen unexpectedly. Ahh, remember what I said before they are feeling a bit jaded, look at that. They are finding love again. They are calling you again back in their manifestation circle. Whoo. You may not want kids with them. I don't know why maybe, you are set on your mentality that you don't want kids period. Set a timeline for yourself. In my opinion, don't do that! Because at the end of the day, you have lessons to learn with your kids whether with them or with someone else. But for some of you, I felt that you are having kids with your Twin flame. Your twin is your Fs. I think that they may have kids already you'll be done with it. I'll raise their kids. In my opinion, you are braver than me. Lol 😆 just kidding. This relationship will help you two heal a lot of y'all trauma. I'm sorry but I'm calling you out on it. Most of you, have a lot of emotional fears. That's something you two are blocking from one another. Like they are block emotionally, but I do sense that they are trying and you just staying that way. It keeps you safe but their more discovery with your emotions that can help bring in the people who want to love you including your Fs. I think that they are in a new relationship but they aren't taking it seriously. But they have a new girlfriend but I have a sense that it is just dating for them. Oh yes, both of you are ready for union. I say go for it!!! Be ready for this union that can help you two grow and become better.
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Pile 7: In this lifetime you and your FS will become trillions. Wow, that’s cool. They are a bit pushy because they want to make sure that you have everything you want. I sense a fighter. Oh my god! Haha, having sex with your Fs is going to be fucking mind-blowing which I believe so. Haha 😂 awesome. What's your destiny between you and your FS I have a sense of feeling it is high-school sweethearts for some of you. Right now they are trying to connect with their inner child🥲💕. They probably watch Disney movies and childhood movies. They grew up watching. Whenever you get detached from them. I sense that they might be annoyed by you. “I can't win with you. Ugh, what did I do wrong? This is why we aren't working because you are so stubborn as hell. Help me understand this shit. I'm your partner so let me be your partner.” Oh yeah, they are the type to like the bottom position if you know what I mean ladies and gentlemen.🤭🤤🤤. So their energy right now at the moment they aren't feeling themselves. So even when you are with them it isn't you it is just them. Oh yeah, I think your Fs go both ways. 🙌🏽 good for them. I think that your Fs are in a relationship with a man and they are exploring their sexuality. Should I say? They are curious. So they'll tell you about their experiences with their boo-boo. Haha 😂 how lovely is that? Oh yeah! Your Fs is a fucking freak! Ahh! I am fucking gagging. Yes 👍🏽 so they'll eat your pussy while you in a bubble bath. Oh yeah, soak your pussy in their mouth 👅. Oh yeah, that shit giving a bitch wetty wet. You'll meet them in a library 📚. They probably like to read or just like to be in the library by themselves. I heard “Sanctuary.”they do a lot of sex magic to bring you into their life quicker💋. Masturbation is important to people. Do some play play. Even to just make yourself feel good. Oh okay, so in the beginning, you two won't immediately like each other because you two are having a bad day. So you two will be playing a lot of mind games with one another. They are indecisive themselves. So they'll be like “I don't know”. You may get tired of it and vice versa. You and your Fs are going through a similar situation. Oh yeah, you might be like “Ugh Why?” things happen sometimes. Oh wow, they are your spouse they want to make it known. “Hey, cupcake 🧁 just gonna say it one more time to you. I am your Husband/wife. I mean I know I haven't proven it to you or been my best but I'll do whatever it takes to make you happy forever.” In the beginning, I don't think they ain't gonna like how prude you are at first. Because you know your Fs is a beautiful person so they'll be bitches throwing themselves at them. Awe, when you two do meet both of y'all eyes just lock in with one another. Isn't that crazy? Amazing isn't it? Okay, your Fs isn't a celebrity. This is cool 👍🏽 you don't want any celebrity all the time but I do feel in my opinion, everybody has a connection with a celebrity regardless of some status that is attached to their name. Sorry for ranting. But anyway, they are well-known in their community. See! There is a lot of physical attraction between you two. Oh my goodness, it isn't that exciting. Eep! Aww, you are their divine counterpart. 🔥👅. I can tell there is some passion with you two. I was right! They have this deep love and affection for you. Awe, they'll curse out their fans for you. I hear “neighbors.” so if anybody tries to mess with you know not to step close. This connection with you two will help you both grow and it is a lot of work that needs to be done. You'll have to make the effort to work with them. I'm hearing “a lot to handle.” hmm, at the moment they are scared 😱 they are trying to take a different direction. Okay, I have a feeling that some of you, don't have a celebrity spouse. A certain amount of you do have celebrity spouses which is cool. Oh yeah, fans will DM you rude messages and keep on bothering you. I see why your Fs curse their asses out. I think their fans are tough. But aren't part of your destiny but these fans are going crazy.
After the meeting with them, you'll leave a huge impression on them after the meeting. They'll never forget your face or what kind of feeling you give them. Okay, your Twin flame is trying to connect with you and talk to you. So you may not fuck with your twin now or you spiritually blocked them. These are a couple of you two remind me of. Oh wow, they are deciding in their next life they want to be with you. I'm hearing “That's a promise” Oh yeah, until death, they are making that as a fact. Yes, so whenever you are starting up your business you are fucking amazing and you'll start to make it happen. Remember what I said earlier? Well, this is why. They are deciding if they want to be with you romantically. I don't know I had a vision I can see them walking back and forth in their living room. Hitting their fingernails. It must be a tough decision. Oh yeah, your Fs hits 👊 hard so you'll be scared for them to fight someone. I think that you'll know how your FS gets. Okay, a lot of Hollywood stars will tell you to not go out with your Fs because of their past. Honestly, doesn't matter what these people say or who you can love. You probably won't get along with one of your Fs family members. So I had a vision that you tell your Fs saying “I don't like her” It's probably because you two had a past life before. I don't know. Smooth aren't they? They'll convince you to go out with them. You probably have been saying “no” so many times. I heard “not ready.” you probably aren't ready to go on dates with someone. Wow 😮 they'll be the ones to expose your pregnancy all over social media. “I’m gonna be a Dad”. Awe I can see them jumping for joy. Both of you will trigger each other but you two must heal one another. Call out their triggers and yours. I can tell you two arguments aren't pretty. It going to be a lot of disagreement. But you'll love them and they'll love you. They'll praise you all the time. Give you compliments. I can see it happening. Oh yeah, a lot of positive vibes in this connection with them. It just takes a lot of effort. See! A lot of your fears will be blocking your happiness and them too. You won't be able to see what's right in front of you if you don't surrender. Oh yeah!! Remember, what the fuck I said! Haha 😂 I cannot with myself. You and your Fs family have some unfinished business. Something has to end with their family member. I don't know what it is but it is something. Aww, y'all daughter in Stars or the Galaxy is sending you and your Fs messages including now. They are working on getting her parents together but she is feeling a bit ignored by you both. Maybe, you need to do a reading on your kids. I think you may start dating your friend first. I heard “hangout” so I feel like you won't be interested in a friend like that but I do see you hanging out with their friend. Oh my goodness, I think that you two are social media couples. I don't see much privacy for you too. So you two will post a lot on the IG. I mean wtf! This card loves to come out. So yeah, both of you are each other's Divine Counterparts. Both of you can do slow-paced or fast-paced. It is still a perfect match. I'm hearing “compliment each other.” I feel that's what you two do for each other. They may have twisted braids or you could or their friend. It can be either or. Oh yeah, there is a lot of running away in this connection. I can tell. Geez, I sense a lot of scariness from you and them but from you too. I don't think you trust easily. You have a hard time. I hear you say “People don't get me.” you've been disappointed by people before. Relationships you probably think to yourself you don't know how to be a girlfriend. I can hear your Fs say “I don't know how to be a boyfriend either.” partnership is responsibility. But even though two of you will go through your ups and downs. This still is a beautiful connection 📶 relationship. You'll let a lot of your walls down with them. See! You two are meant to make a lot of money 💵 together. Help each other build a business with one another. Oh, sexy, goddamn!
I can tell that you two will be hot and heavy. That's the song I heard in my head. So much passion with you. That's why I feel like you'll get instantly pregnant with them. It doesn't matter how old you are. It feels like this is kind of the same pile I just wrote this on. Hmm… weird💞. In this lifetime you are going to be your FS fiancè. So yeah, it is going to feel like love at first sight with them. You two will be planning out your wedding. I don't sense anything too major. But small. I heard them say “She finally said yes”. So it is going to take you a minute to say yes to them. I feel like you are going to surprise and shock them. Aww, both of you have been written in the stars. I think when you are with them you'll start to trust your instincts better. Ask yourself is this what you want? Do you want this? You can change your destiny but there is something for you it is going to happen regardless of how you change the rotation. Okay, your FS is your Twin Flame. That's why the ups and downs and running away. Whew, there is a lot of that. Running away. You two are intense. I see that you two share a lot of harmony. Oh yeah, this is your soul family 👪 oh my goodness. I don't know why but I think I might cry 😭 they are part of your soul mission and vice versa. They are part of your destiny in this lifetime. You are marrying your soul family. They will fully complete you and vice versa. Even if you are with someone else at the moment they'll wait until it's their turn. They know you are their true love ❤️ why not be with them? See! Again, you'll feel happy with them and it is like again, and you'll feel complete with them. You just have to give it a chance. Whoever you are thinking about this person has a lot to do with you in a past life. I don't know what happened but there is something. I'm hearing “It never got completed.” so there is something that never got completed for real. Hmmm… I think your Fs are fighting back against your other FS from the spiritual realm. I don't know what's the issue here but it seems like they are a little bit scared 😱 but I don't see these other Fs lasting long in your life yes! Promotion your career is going to take off with them. I see that in this lifetime, you two were meant to work together side by side. Manifesting abundances! I think y'all manifestation is going to happen so quickly. Aw 💞💞 that's the song I'm hearing. I feel that most of you will be meeting your ultimate in this lifetime. Whether your twin flame or soulmate you're gonna be with them in this lifetime. It is a headache but it is worth the risk.
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neonghostlights · 3 months
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Quiet Part Two: When It Started
Vampire!Eddie Munson x Detective!Reader
Series Summary: Ten years after Eddie’s death you are a detective for the Hawkins Police Department. When there are a string of deaths you can’t solve, someone comes back from the grave with answers to everything.
Warnings: nothing really beside upside down stuff, death, missing animals and overall gloom. Next part gets bloodier.
Series Masterlist
End Of September 1996•Ten Years Later
You were tired as you dragged yourself into the station.
It was early, earlier than you wanted to be. Coffee in hand as you made your way to your office that was beside the chiefs.
“Good morning!” Loretta said cheerily from her desk. She was somewhat new, starting just a few months ago after Gloria finally retired. She was a single mom in her forties, trying to make money again after her asshole of an ex left her with nothing except for four little ones to take care of.
“Morning, Loretta,” you grumbled through a breath of air as you stalked past her.
You’d be nicer later after you had a chance to drink your caffeine.
Maybe you’d bring her back a deli sandwich after lunch and pretend that they messed up your order again so you didn’t have to see her eat stale crackers as her lunch from the break room again.
“You’re starting to sound like me,” Hopper called in lieu of greeting as you passed his office to reach yours.
“Haha,” you deadpanned.
You would think the man would want to stay home after dealing with the shit he’s been through. After his sudden reemergence back in 1986 after a hospital mix up and case of mistaken identity that made the whole to m think he was dead he quickly returned back to his role as chief police of Hawkins.
Of course you and a select few knew where he really was all for all of those months and why he was in such bad shape when he returned.
Hopper shook his head as you sat down at your desk.
Hawkins decided to hire a detective after what happened in ‘86. They decided to have someone trained to handle more complex cases instead of just sending deputies on wild goose chases through town.
So that’s why you went to school and took the job once you graduated.
The only downfall was how boring it was. Hawkins population was low since the ‘earthquake’. A lot of people left, and there were quite a few deaths.
Hence, not a lot of crime except for neighbors accusing each other of stealing lawn mowers and run away animals.
“Detective,” Deputy Callahan chided as he slid a file onto your desk. “We’ve got a missing dog. Maybe if you hurry up you’ll be able to get finger prints of the doggy bowl.”
You rolled your eyes. “For the one hundredth time I’m not animal control. Go bother someone else.”
“Leave her alone,” Hopper called from his office. The damn walls were so thin.
And you didn’t really need Hopper to stand up for you, not anymore.
You yanked the file away from Callahans finger tips.
“I’ll find the damn dog,” you mumbled as he walked away with a laugh.
——
“I can’t believe they messed up your order again,” Loretta gushed as she took a bite of her sandwich.
“I know,” you sighed as you put together yet another coffee for yourself.
“Do you have any plans for this weekend?” Loretta asked.
You raised your eyebrows at her because she knew you never had plans but she was polite enough to ask anyways.
She laughed. “I’m gonna go ahead and get a head start on the kids Halloween costumes this weekend. Jake’s insisting on being a cowboy and Valerie wants to be the tooth fairy.”
“Better then when I was a witch for 7 years in a row,” you shrugged.
“At least the baby doesn’t care what I dress her in as long as it’s warm.”
You smiled and said goodbye to her as you made your back to your desk.
You saw the file sitting on your desk and a rush of excitement went through you as you pulled it off your desk and opened it up, excited to have a new case.
Just to see it was a missing cat.
You threw the file in your cabinet and slammed it hard enough for Callahan to hear in the other room.
You hated this place.
“Kid, I need you on a call. It’s the Walker’s dog,” Hopper said as he poked his head into your office.
“I am not animal control! How many damn times do I need to-“
“No. You’re gonna want to see this.”
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sweetestofchaos · 1 year
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Stray Kids reaction to...you being stood up
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Backstory: When the date you were excited about doesn’t show, your best friend is there to make it better. Warnings: Crying, Strong Language Rating: Teen Genre: Angst and Fluff
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Chan
Chan sat beside your sleep figure on the couch. Tears were dried on your cheeks, your nose swollen from blowing it and your lips were turned into a pout. He hated seeing you so upset, especially when he was the one that hyped you up earlier that night. He was the one that told you to put yourself out there more and the one time you did, the asshat you gave a chance trampled all over your heart. As he watched you sleep, Chan vowed to himself that he would never let you get hurt like this every again, not if he could help it.
“If I see that asshole, I’m putting him in the ground.”
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Minho
Minho had just stepped out for his morning run when he got your call. The sound of your voice, broken and wobbly made him rush to where you were at. He found you at the café that the two of you always go to. He knew by the slump in your shoulders that he wouldn’t say a word about the date. He ordered two drinks, one for himself and the other for you; waiting off to the side. Grabbing the drinks and a slice of cake for you, Minho sits at the table and sets everything down quietly. If you cried while eating the cake, Minho didn’t comment on it.
“Thought you could use a slice. It’s your favorite.”
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Hyunjin
He really didn’t know what to say while you cried in his arms. He held you and fought back his own tears. Your pain was his pain and if it were up to him, he would make sure you never felt this soul crushing agony again. He held you tighter and rubbed your back while thinking of what to say. Was there anything he could do to make you feel better?
“Come on, watch that show you keep talking about. We can do facemasks and eat whatever you want. Sound good?”
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Jisung
He was outside of your house by the time you got home in the cab. The moment he saw you, he grabbed your keys from you and took your hand in his. The two of you made it into your apartment and sat on the couch. You tried not the cry, it was stupid to cry. You hardly new the person that stood you up, really. Jisung lanced your fingers together and tugged you into his chest. You started to cry and he patted your head, not saying much of anything.
“It’s okay to cry. Go head, I won’t judge. But tomorrow we’re going out!”
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Felix
He wasn’t going to be extra but something felt off when you told him about your date. He wasn’t surprised when he drove to the address that your date had giving you and saw that it was a closed down shop. So, he did what any best friend would do. He packed up a picnic basket and arrived to the shop twenty minutes early because he knew you would show up ten minutes after him, always liking to be early. When you stepped out of the cab, you were confused when you saw Felix but you knew why he was here the moment you looked behind him at the closed shop. It stung, you felt your eyes burn and Felix looked ready to cry himself but he cleared his throat and offered you his arm.
“Come on, I know a great spot on the river.”
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Seungmin
Seungmin couldn’t believe his ears. What do you mean your date never showed? He was quick to explain the situation to Chan, get permission to skip out on a group activity to be with you. He threw on some nicer clothing and did his hair quickly, even had Felix help him with makeup before he drove to the restaurant that you were at. Seeing you sitting alone nearly made him turn back around to search that asshole down, but he stopped himself. He sat across from you and winked as a waiter came over to take your orders.
“It’s their loss, trust me. D-Do you want me hurt em?”
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Changbin
He was waiting up for you at your place, just to make sure that you got home okay from your date. When he heard your front door open a forty minutes later, he nearly jumped up ready to fight whatever intruder came in. When he saw you standing there with tears streaming down your face, Changbin leaped to his feet and started questioning you, checking all over your body to make sure you weren’t hurt. Seeing that you weren’t harmed, Changbin was confused but he didn’t ask any questions. He told you to get a shower and get in some comfy pjs while he ordered takeout and drinks.
“You don’t have to tell me anything right now, okay? I just want you to know that I’m here and I’m not going anywhere.”
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Jeongin
When he saw you sitting alone at the ice cream parlor, he was confused. Weren’t you supposed to be on a date? Where were they? He was about to leave and pretend that he didn’t see you on your date, but when he looked at you again he noticed the untouched bottle of water in the seat across from you. He frowned as a thought crossed his mind. Where you being stood up? Pulling out his phone he sent you a text asking how the date was going and when you replied right away he frowned at your response. So your date never showed? He stepped into the parlor and wrapped his arms around your shoulders from behind before he sat across from you.
“Fancy meeting you here, huh?”
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hoodlessmads · 5 months
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Dark Heir spoiler thoughts:
Okay some of these are criticisms but please understand I really liked it! I liked it even more than Dark Rise. I’m just an overdramatic person and need to yell sometimes.
These don’t have any particular order, I’m just freestyling -
Reading Captive Prince years ago (and rereading since) before reading Dark Rise made me have an unfair resentment towards James for being basically the same character as Laurent but not as good and that continued here
Will is the second best character Pacat has ever made after Laurent and book 3 might push him ahead
I loved seeing Will use more and more of his evil powers
The best one being where he possesses anyone with a brand and his eyes turn black and he turns into Legion (maybe shoulda turned that off before trying to appeal to Violet…)
Finding out his mom actually was tying him to bedposts and beating him this whole time somehow shocked me because for some silly reason I believed one of the most unreliable third person subjective narrators ever, Will, that she was a nice lady just doing her best. Anyway I love this revelation because it makes such perfect sense, it’s just, “Oh. Of course.”
Violet and Cyprian are both himbos yet Violet is somehow the only character with a single brain cell left at the end of the book
Cyprian drinking from the cup makes no sense after they had a whole discussion in the first book about how drinking from the cup put the Stewards into the Dark King’s plans and made them his thralls and was the entire reason they died, a massacre which Cyprian experienced viscerally, and then he goes and drinks from the cup anyway and oops surprise Will can in fact enthrall him. Cyprian is able to fight it off but that doesn’t change the complete recklessness and out-of-character-ness of it to me.
Violet/Cyrprian is a good ship
Phillip/Visander is hilarious (in a good way)
Will/James is fine but I wish I was more compelled by them than I actually am. For being the main couple, I don’t feel like their relationship has been given the room it needed to develop organically and instead it feels like we’re falling back on physical attraction and a vague shadow of a past relationship in the old world that we didn’t get to see. It’s hard not to compare to Damen/Laurent which by contrast was developed so painstakingly.
Elizabeth is incredible
Visander sucks, actually
The whole Light kind of sucks. The Stewards, the Sun Kingdom, they were all assholes
People with black-and-white morality are truly terrible, aren’t they? And pretty much everyone is like that except for Will, James, and Violet
Sometimes I felt like that fact was really being hammered in on purpose almost as though to make James murdering like 300 people seem less bad (but it didn’t….)
But I don’t dislike James because he murdered 300 people, I actually love villains and I especially am attached to the idea of everyone being redeemable. But what I don’t like is the book telling me I should like James without giving me a good reason or the book downplaying his actions to make him seem more sympathetic. He can have murdered all the Stewards and still be compelling, we don’t need to diminish what he’s done in order for him to be likable
Also everyone in this book except like, Will and maybe Violet and James is an idiot (and I’ll excuse Elizabeth for only being ten). Someone send these characters to Psych 101, they don’t seem to understand the concept of a self-fulfilling prophecy…
Like obviously if you tell someone they’re evil over and over again for their whole lifetime they will become evil
Theory - I don’t think Violet will turn on Will. I think she’s just shell-shocked. She wasn’t really given a chance to take a stance before James Peter Panned him away. Violet knows exactly what it feels like to be told you are evil because of some past thing, and she knows Will better than any of the other characters. And she knows that morality is not black and white (Tom is her brother). She’ll definitely end up in Will’s corner by the end.
Theory - The line of the Lady and the line of the Dark King are the same bloodline and they split off later. Sarcean’s “cataclysmic night together” with the Lady was mentioned not once but twice. Pacat doesn’t waste lines. The child that the Lady had was Sarcean’s, or at least one of them.
Will better figure out how to destroy that collar quick…before they both get even more traumatized. I think that will be one of his main goals in book 3. Or I hope…otherwise it will be hard to develop the genuine romance
I sure hope Will can also figure out how to expel that shadow from Cyprian before he like… dies. Don’t do that to Violet D:
So, I’m not a huge fan of YA in general (outside of YA anime and manga which for some reason hits different). I used to like it a lot, it used to be most of what I read. I grew up reading series like Redwall, Darren Shan, Demonata, Pendragon, and so on. But I’ve grown out of the genre (I’m 27). Not every adult does - one of my best friends who is a year older than me still really enjoys YA. But because I don’t like YA, I think my enjoyment of Dark Rise/Dark Heir is influenced and my criticisms may be unfair.
But I find that with fantasy series like this, I the books really need to be longer. Or there needs to be more of them. I feel like Dark Rise has so many moving pieces, enough characters that there could be a trading card game (and there are literally collectible cards), so many different magical artifacts and magical powers, an entire magical old world beneath the semi-magical 1820s Europe world to develop, and also by the way a whole story that took place 10,000 years ago that has to be told at some point. I find myself feeling like all these different elements are being introduced and moved on from too fast and I wish they were all given more time to breathe. I think that’s part of why the relationship between Will and James feels a bit rushed to me. I don’t know if the short length of the series was Pacat’s choice or an editor’s, though. I don’t feel like Captive Prince had this issue because there were no supernatural elements, the cast was much smaller, and the plot was comparably simple so a lot of it got to be characters just talking to each other, which was great, and the world building was accomplished mainly through these interactions. The plot and world of Dark Rise is much larger in scope but the page count is the same (a little longer maybe).
So wait who is Mrs. Duval
Why did Ettore leave the Stewards anyway? Other than the obvious, which is that they suck
Where was Grace during the whole ending scene? Wasn’t she there but just not saying anything. As this total calamity befalls her only remaining friend group she finally has seen too much and just nopes out and is busy making tea in the corner or maybe popcorn
I do really like Cyprian btw in spite of thinking his moral code is shitty. Gave Violet a chance but sold Will for one corn chip… I see how it is (okay that’s not fair but you know what I mean, he has flaws)
It sounds like I’m in the majority when I say that I still don’t like Devon - I saw that theory about him being the final big bad and I’m so on that train. I think he’d make a good enough final villain. I agree there is something predatory about him and Tom. I don’t necessarily think Pacat wants us to root for them as a couple, though. There were better ways to pull that off if that was the intent.
Not to repeat myself but Phillip was such a pleasant surprise. Like who is this fruit and how did he get here
So next book, I hope (assume) we get to see the rest of the old world story filled in so we can understand where it all went wrong for Sarcean and also the exact nature of his relationship with Anharion because so far it’s been quite vague (intentionally I assume). Like….. you know….. did he agree to put on the collar?
The tricky thing about this series is that once the reader learns that Will is the Dark King, it’s hard to maintain any sort of external tension. Right? It’s hard to feel afraid of the forces of the Dark when the protagonist has total effortless control over them just by virtue of who he is. Will can literally just be like, “No, don’t” and everything’s fine. He did just this at the end of Dark Rise. I find the way Dark Heir seems to end with their “only hope of stopping the Dark army” destroyed to be pretty unconvincing. Why on earth would Sarcean create a destructible object that is the only way of controlling his own army? Of course Will should be able to control them with his will alone. If he can control Shadow Kings and make them die with his words alone, why didn’t he try yelling at the shadow army to stop trying to possess people? This doesn’t make sense to me. And if people become Returners through his magic, shouldn’t he be able to exert some control over their existence the way he does with the branded? Pacat has done a good enough job at getting us to know Sarcean (an extremely good job btw) so as to make the destroyed brand plot point unbelievable. Anyway…
Instead, the tension in Dark Heir is almost entirely internal or realized in character relationships rather than physical threats. The tension is between Will and himself, and between Will and his friends. (There are tensions between other characters but focusing on the main plot here.) The possibility that they might find out and abandon him, and the possibility that he might actually be as nasty of a guy as Sarcean was, the slim chance that he might learn something that makes him go, “You know what, I agree with my past self after all.”
Now that everyone has found out who he is, that particular source of tension has sort of evaporated, so now in book 3 Pacat has to find a way to make Will’s conflict with himself and his friends compelling enough to carry us through 450 pages (I don’t expect this will be difficult). What I see as the problems now are 1) what was Sarcean actually planning and how did he plan on getting Will (himself) to fall in line with them (this was a question in Dark Heir as well but now it’s bigger), 2) how is Will going to destroy his own (Sarcean’s) Dark artifacts so he can free James, and 3) Can he convince anyone to ever love him (oh no ouch).
If I had to rank these books at this stage I’d probably give Rise a 3.7 ish…. and Heir a 4.2. I’m holding out for Dark King to be a 5 or close. (I don’t know what the actual title will be, I’m just guessing lol.) I definitely think Dark Heir is an improvement over Dark Rise since I always thought the most interesting part of the latter by far was everything that happened once Will learns he is the Dark King at the very end.
“Are we going to talk about the magic pseudo-sex scene—“ No and I hope we never will
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hannahssimblr · 28 days
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Epilogue (Final Part)
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It’s hours later and we’re still talking. The DJ arrives around ten and cracks the speakers up to ear-ringing heights so we exit to the lobby and stand by the window as the snow falls and the lights from the ten foot Christmas tree twinkle on the glass. 
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“No, no, stop, I can’t take it anymore,” He shrieks in agony as he grabs my arm, “He said that when he was inside you?”
“Yes! I didn’t know what to say back, like, um, thanks pal?”
“‘You’re so Alpha’” He repeats, deadpan, but his shoulders betray him when they start wobbling again, “‘and I’m just a little-”
“Beta boy, yes. Oh Evie, you intimidate me so much, I’ve always wanted to fuck a girl who scared me.”
“I’m going to die because of this story,” He cries, “I refuse to believe that men like this exist, it’s just too much.”
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“There was this other lad too,” I begin, “Not as bad, but he got a nosebleed halfway through and it was dripping all over my face for like fifteen minutes before either of us noticed.”
“No!”
“Yeah, God, I feel bad, I think he was on some blood thinning medication or something but like…” We fall about laughing again, laughing and laughing until I think I’ll start gagging. I remember thinking during that experience that there was only one other person in the world who would find it as hilarious as I did, and as we splutter and cackle now at my retelling I remember how it used to be like this all of the time with us. I think about the time we lost through staying out of touch as he wipes his eyes and stumbles to the side a little bit, from laughing or from drinking a little too much, I’m not sure.
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“Women are not like that,” he says, “I’m sorry for you, but they’re not, even the crazy LA ones don’t put me in situations like that.” He steadies himself a little by bracing his arm on the wall, so close that I could count his eyelashes if I wanted to. “I just don’t get it, do you think they get nervous?”
“Nervous around me? I doubt it. Sure what’s there to be nervous of?”
“It’s a lot of pressure, you know, making love to a beautiful woman for the first time. There’s a lot on the line, the chances of humiliation are high, maybe, I don’t know, maybe that guy just blurted the first weird thing that came into his head-” He breaks off because a high pitched laugh has exploded out of him again, “But it’s a flex to say that you’re so hot that you give men nosebleeds.”
“Oh come on, you’re exaggerating.”
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“No, for real. Don’t you remember how nervous you made me when we were young? I turned into a total idiot around you.”
“Hardly.”
“It’s true. You were like this stunning princess and I was just some guy.”
I scoff, “Some guy?”
“Yeah, and it’s nice to see that some things never change because you’re still so beautiful and I’m still just a random man off the street.”
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“Hmm, c’mon, you’re just schmoozing me,” I say, “Is this the way you all sweet-talk each other in Los Angeles? That’s not going to work. Irish girls are too humble to accept that.”
“Have I made you self-conscious?”
“No, I’m just wondering if you’re actually trying to flirt with me now or if you’re just trying to make me feel better about the fact that I’m thirty and my body is slowly ageing and rotting away.”
“Don’t say that, you look better than ever.”
I narrow my eyes, “I’m so curious about your game.”
“What do you mean?”
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“Yeah, how you approach women, how you flirt with them now. What’s your technique? Is it intense flattery?”
He scoffs, “Oh, no, come on, I don’t have a technique, I don’t think about it like that.”
“No?”
“What do you think I am? Some kind of weirdo pick-up artist? No. I… I improvise, it depends on so much, like, where I am, who she is, what I feel like I’m hoping to get from the situation…”
“Okay okay, right. Well what if you were at an event with friends. Say, a wedding…”
He smirks at me.
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“…and you see a woman standing on her own by the bar, and you know, she’s pretty mysterious in quite a sexy way, and you’re looking at her and thinking, hmm, yeah, maybe I’d like a piece of that-”
“You think that’s my inner monologue?” He interrupts, “That I think like that?”
“No, shh- shut up for a second, in this scenario you do. And you’re going to go over and talk to her, and you see the perfect opportunity to do it, and the lights from the dancefloor are shining in her hair, and oh, she looks so lonely over there, someone should go and keep her company…’
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“I’d say hi, you’re very pretty, can I kiss you please?”
“Really?”
“Yeah t-”
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He doesn’t finish because I have grabbed him by the lapels and pressed my lips against his. Maybe it’s for the joke, or because I’m slightly drunk, or maybe it’s to see if it still feels the way that it used to, I don’t know. I don’t really think about it, it’s just happening. 
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“Oh look, it worked!” I say as we pull away, and I don’t really have a chance to try and read his face to see what he thinks about it because he takes a step towards me and kisses me again, though differently to how I kissed him, gentler, slower, with my head cradled in his hands, which is inconvenient because he makes my insides start flip flopping around. I draw back laughing, “What are you at?”
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“We’re kissing now,” he confirms, then frowns, “I think. Aren’t we kissing? Or is this a hallucination?”
“Jude…”
“Don’t you want us to be kissing?”
“Well it’s not that, it’s-”
“Ah, you think it’s dangerous to be kissing.”
“If you keep saying ‘kissing’ it’s going to lose all meaning.”
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“What did we call it when we were teenagers? Shiftin’ right? Will you shift me, Evie?”
“Oh my God,” I hold my hand up to his face, “it is illegal for you to put on an accent and say that. I hate that you can still do that.”
“My Irish voice?” he says in his Irish voice. 
“Please get that away from me!”
“Sorry about that,” he settles back into his American drawl, and I jerk with surprise as I feel the tips of his fingers graze my waist, “Also, I’m sorry that I kissed you, I thought we were, you know, doing that now.”
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“It was a joke… And maybe just a little bit so that I could see if it still felt the same as it used to.”
His eyes tour my face, “Did it?”
“Did it for you?”
The corners of his mouth tick up, “I don’t know, it’s been a long time since I’ve kissed you, and honestly I didn’t get a decent sample, mind if I try it again?”
“Aha! I’ve figured out your game,” I declare, “You put on that silly act you’ve always put on, don’t you?”
He hooks his finger into the strap of my dress before it drops off my shoulder, “Hm? What act is that?”
“Your favourite one. ‘Oh, little old me? I’m so innocent, why I’ve never even held hands before, and I certainly haven’t fucked half of Dublin city. I don’t even know what sex is.’”
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He gasps with delight and stares right into my face, “You’re still obsessed!” He cries, “and you haven’t stopped wondering about me!”
“About what, exactly?”
“My body count! After all these years it still tortures you. You’re so shallow…”
“Oh please, I couldn’t care less.”
“Evie,” He says mock-scoldingly, really drawing out the syllables, “I can’t believe it. I told you back then that it didn’t matter, that I didn’t have to tell you if I didn’t want to, but you’ve never let it go to this day. Wow. Wow.”
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“I don’t even want to know,” I sniff, “It’s meaningless information to me now.”
“Well since you don’t care and it has no power over you anymore, maybe you finally ought to know…” He glances quickly around the empty lobby before his eyes slide back to mine and he whispers, “that you were the seventh.”
“The seventh?”
“Is that a good-surprise or bad-surprise?”
“Well I thought it’d be so many more.”
He shrugs, “No, I mean there was the first girl in the playground, then a girl who worked in the tennis club at the beach, a girl from my maths class at school, Michelle, someone from my university, Astrid, and then you-” He pauses, “Wait, there was another one. You were eighth. Seventh and a half.”
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“And a half? Who did you forget? A centaur?”
He shakes his head, “There was an awkward foursome situation in Berlin once. It’s a long story, really stupid. I’ll tell you about it later.”
“Well I’ve never been more curious.”
“I’m a source of a lot of interesting info.”
“Like your current body count?” I tease.
“Oh, now I’m ran-through.”
“Tell me more about your life.”
“We just don’t have the time tonight.”
“What, not now?” I protest, “Not in this perfectly perfect situation when we’re both a little drunk and potentially snowed in for days, when there’s nothing to do but talk to each other?”
“No, see you’ve changed the subject, you’ve got me messed up. I…” He laughs tipsily and sways a little bit closer to me, through accident or otherwise I’m not sure, “…I was thinking about how much I might like to kiss you for a little longer this time, just to see if you still give me that same crazy feeling that I used to get with you, and you distracted me.”
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I act like it’s a burden to me and slump back against the wall, “Fine, go ahead.”
“Oh jeez, no need to beg me, you know it’s off putting to be so eager?”
“Please?”
He comes in close and pecks my lips gently and even that makes my knees start to wobble. “No, come on, give me a proper kiss, that’s the only way we’ll know.”
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“Still so demanding,” He tilts my chin towards him and angles his mouth over mine while his hands skim up my back and hold my body flush to his.  As he strokes his lips over mine I can’t help but curse inwardly because of course this is happening to me, of course it feels like everything I’ve been searching for in the years between then and now, everything I couldn’t find in other people. These are the kinds of kisses that ruined me for other men for years to follow, and he’s ruining me now. 
He glides his tongue along my lower lip and builds this kiss to the kind of intensity that shouldn’t be displayed in a public lobby, but he doesn’t care so neither do I. He kisses me until I’m soft and formless in his arms, until I forget the years in between then and now, and then he finally slows it, brushing his lips against mine and then gently drawing away and I find myself following his mouth in search of more, “The same?” He murmurs with his forehead against mine, “Or terrible?”
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His hand cradles the back of my head as I sigh and bury my face in his shoulder, “What are we going to do, Jude?”
“You’re going to have to try not to be awkward about it because we might be snowed in for several days.” He says, “If you’ve decided I’m crusty and repulsive, you’re going to have to hide it from me to spare my ego. Either that or I’ll camp out in my room out of humiliation and get my sister to bring my meals to me until I can get the earliest flight to LAX.”
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I pause, “so you’re sharing with your sister?”
“Yeah we booked late, so a twin room was all they had left. And she snores like hell.”
“Well that’s a pity because I booked months ago, and got a huge room all to myself. A four poster bed and a big gorgeous bath.”
“Are you bringing that up to make me jealous or is that an invitation?”
I scoff, “an invitation to what, exactly?”
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“Come up and fuck you in the bath or something, I don’t know. Why would you bring the bath into it?”
“That’d be fairly shameless of me, wouldn’t it, if that’s what I was alluding to.”
“Is that the kind of woman you’ve become? The kind that invites strange men into her bath?”
“God no, I’d never directly ask that, that’d be very slutty.”
He brushes his fingers gently along the side of my neck, which is unfair because he knows how much I like that, and as I feel that touch all the way down to my toes he gives me a sly little smile and draws back to look at me, “I don’t know, you’ve really talked up this bath and you’ve got me curious. Will you show it to me?”
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“You’ve always been so cheeky, did you know that? You ask audacious things of people.”
“Me? Never. That’s just not me, you must be thinking of somebody else. Of one of your other ex-boyfriends.” He grins and saunters casually toward the stairs, glancing over his shoulder at me as he goes, “I actually just remembered that I spilled something on my suit.”
“Did you.”
“Mm, I’m a total mess, I might be drunker than I look. I think I better go and take it off.”
“Doesn’t suit you anyway. You were always better in shorts.”
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He pauses for a moment and regards me with one raised eyebrow, a question, and I don’t care that I’m predictable to him, that he already knows I will push myself away from the wall and catch up to him, “Actually you have the right idea, my dress is uncomfortable. I want to change out of it, only I’m not sure I can manage the zip on my own.”
“Oh, I can help you with that,” he says, “Or at least I can try, you know, but fair warning I haven’t ever undressed a woman before.”
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“I’m sure you’ll figure it out,” I smile, as I wind my fingers through his. 
THE END
Beginning // Prev
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jongseongsnudes · 2 years
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fourteen.
warning; 😵😵😵😵 1.5k words. (there is a lot of dialogue in this chapter but it is definitely necessary!)
masterlist.
“the wedding will be held in 3 months from today. preparations for it have already begun,” the man sitting across from you tells you calmly, “we will have a formal dinner with mr and mrs choi next week so you can meet them.”
“i- i’m sorry... what?”
“yes darling,” mr park chuckles in his fatherly tone, a tone that used to make you feel so happy to hear, now only scares you more than anything. “yours and beomgyu’s wedding. mr choi and i have decided on a good date.”
you waited for someone to speak after the awkward pause, but no one said a thing. nothing. your initial thought of this all being a very unfunny joke was slowly fading, like the smile on your face, everything now becoming too real for you to even fathom.
... but it couldn’t be, could it?
your wedding?
“my- my wedding?!”
“i know i haven’t proposed yet, but i’m working on it,” beomgyu chimes in from your side, his face lit up in complete smiles, “i’ll make sure to plan something unforgettable.”
that wasn’t even the problem!
you glance around in disbelief, your mind unable to wrap around the fact that you were getting married to a man you hardly even knew... and in three months! beomgyu must’ve noticed your silence, the man reaching over to hold your shaking hands in an attempt to calm you. but you were anything but calm.
“i hope you both can get more acquainted during this time and build a relationship before the wedding. it is what mr choi and i truly hope for.”
after what seemed like ten hours hours (which was only about 30 minutes), lunch finally comes to an end with you following mr park out to his waiting car. instead of having beomgyu drive you home like you had initially thought, mr park had offered to take you instead.
settling beside him in the backseat of his car must’ve been the most nerve wracking thing you’ve ever experienced. even though this man was technically your step father, your family, you in no way felt that way.
“i hope you can keep this from sunghoon for now,” mr park says as his eyes busily scan through some files.
“yes... mr park,” you can’t help but think about last night’s fight, sunghoon’s last words screaming at you from the back of your head. - stay the fuck away from me - those words had bothered you all day. living with sunghoon has been difficult from the start but last night’s fight seemed to be it for you. you can no longer live with him. “can i please ask you something mr park?”
“yes darling, of course.”
“about living with sunghoon... is it possible to... move somewhere else?” your fidgety fingers and stutters made it clear that you were a nervous wreck, something mr park had immediately caught onto, “i don’t mind where, i can even work to pay for it while i study.”
“is he giving you a hard time? would you like me to speak to him?”
“no- no! it’s not that!” you were quick to protest, the last thing you wanted was to further ruin their rocky relationship that had gotten worse lately... seemingly because of you. “i just... don’t want to disturb him and his life.”
“i will look into it and let you know when i find a suitable place for you, okay?”
“yes... thank you mr park.”
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you’re not sure how long you spent staring blankly at the television screen for but it was only now you realised it wasn’t even on. a lot had been on your mind since the morning, the word “wedding” the only thing repeating over and over. it was something you just couldn’t wrap your mind around, something you couldn’t believe was really happening. to you!
perhaps you could busy yourself for the rest of the day, maybe a walk in the park, maybe go shopping for a new phone. whatever it may be, was better than mopping around in sunghoon’s apartment. the last thing you needed now was to deal with sunghoon coming home, seeing you and then getting mad again. 
*ding*
shit! he’s home before you even had the chance to leave!
not wanting to bump into him, you get up and quickly make your way towards the bathroom when a hand suddenly grabs onto your arm, yanking you back. the harsh pull has you instantly losing your balance and falling back into his chest, giving him the chance to grab both of your arms to make you face him.
“ow sunghoon-”
“are you fucking out of your mind!” the man’s intimidating face is way too close to yours for your liking, so close that you could feel the rage radiating from his body, “why did you go with him? have you not learnt your lesson!”
“sunghoon- let go-” you were struggling, his grip around you now so tight that it seemed impossible to escape, almost suffocating you at this point. “w- why do you even care what i do? i can go wherever i want-”
“cut the bullshit! i have never met someone as dumb as you! do you not fucking think before you do-”
“you’re the one who told me to stay away from you! it- it’s what i’m trying to do!” your eyes go wide at the realisation that you had just talked back to sunghoon without any sort of alcohol in you and for it to be so natural. you’ve definitely become more gutsy living lately. “sunghoon let go!”
never have you screamed so loudly at anyone before, let alone at the park sunghoon. his cocked brows tells you that he’s just as surprised as you were at your outburst, if not even more so but you couldn’t care less at this point. you’ve really just had enough of this man always treating you like a rag doll.
and to your surprise, sunghoon really does as asked, both his arms retracting back to his sides as he glances away from you. he’s still obviously angry, his heaving chest and loud sighs the proof of that but your screams seemed to have knocked some sense into him.
“i... i already spoke to mr park, he said he’ll look into another place for me. so you don’t need to worry about me being here for much longer,” you turn to walk away but your step brother reaches out again, gripping his fingers around your wrist to pull you right back to him.
“you spoke to my dad? when? what did he say? what did he say to you!”
“nothing,” a part of you contemplated whether you should’ve told him the truth about the wedding plans, but that would be defying mr park’s words and of course... cause more chaos between them two. “we... we just had lunch.”
“right, lunch. my dad isn’t someone who has casual lunch for fun. what did he say to you? it’s something about you and beomgyu isn’t it?”
every part of you is shaking, intimidated by the fuming sunghoon who stared down at you with a gaze you’ve never seen before. yeah you’ve seen him angry on countless occasions before but never has he been this angry. like he could explode any second now and your next sentence was the sole decider of that.
“n- no-”
*ring ring ring*
with an annoyed grunt, sunghoon pulls out his phone and immediately sighs at the name on the screen. this definitely can’t be any good.
“yes?” you’re not sure who is on the other end but you assume it’s mr park, judging by the clear frustration in sunghoon’s eyes. the same eyes he has whenever he speaks to his dad. “ah right- for a second there i thought you actually wanted to spend time with your kids but then i remembered that you had this family man image of yours that you needed to show. whatever.”
even though the conversation was not directed at you, you chose to stay quiet anyway, especially when sunghoon was looking this mad. but instead of telling you the contents of the phone call like you had expected him to do, sunghoon hangs up the phone and turns to walk away from you.
“we are leaving for japan tomorrow morning.”
“wait- what? we?” your legs unconsciously try to follow sunghoon but the man’s long legs had helped him turn the corner before you could even finish your question. “sunghoon! hey- hey-”
with how quickly you were going, you weren’t able to stop yourself from bumping right into sunghoon once you turned the corner, not really expecting him to be standing there. but he was, and here you were, running right into him.
“sorry-”
“why do i always need to repeat myself with you?”
the coldness in his tone and the disgusted gaze in his eyes reminds you of the day you moved into his apartment. it’s a day you don’t ever want to remember yet somehow... everything feels like it’s that day all over again.
back to day one.
just like the current relationship between you and sunghoon.
end.
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phoenixkaptain · 1 year
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It’s very funny to read extended lore Star Wars, canon or Legends’, because Leia and Darth Vader are both very similar, at least to deal with.
It’s like, Leia’s plans and Vader’s plans are so similar! “Okay, step one: we draw all of the fire to me. Step two: attack from the sides. Optional step three, if step two doesn’t work: jump on in again.”
The biggest difference is that Leia does not actually want to kill anybody who’s unarmed, like civilians and prisoners, while Vader has already killed the civilians and prisoners while everyone else was thinking about if they should or not. But even in that way, they are similar, if only because both of them are fucking insane and stubborn as fuck. Leia is like “If I die, I will die not killing someone, sucker. Just try to stop me.” Vader is like “On the off chance I die, I will die killing someone. Can’t believe you thought you could stop me.”
My favourite part of Star Wars is posthumously making Leia and Vader act similar. They are both stonecold and accept no criticism and it is very funny that Leia is the Anakin of the group.
Luke, over there in the corner, is the Obi-Wan of the group. He is painfully optimistic, annoyingly optimistic, he the type of person to land a crashed ship and say “another happy landing.” I don’t know how to explain this any better, Obi-Wan and Luke are twinsies, okay, in being optimistic despite the fact that there is a dagger to their throat.
Han is the Padme of the group. No explanation necessary.
I know knee-jerk reaction is to tell me I’m seeing what I want to be there, but on the other hand! Luke and Leia, especially in later comics, are portrayed very often cloaked in darkness. As in, their faces are shadowed and they don’t often step into the light, which is a clear indication that the writers are going “look! Look these are Vader’s kids! Vader’s kids! Look!” which I approve of tenfold and think we should do in all modern media-
Leia specifically though let’s her anger get the best of her rather often actually. Is the best plan really to try and take the guy (who decided to storm a heavily guarded prison and kill all of the prisoners) hostage? No! No that is not the best plan! But, he specifically says he wants Leia to kill him and that the war against the Empire will be lost if Leia had any humanity and Leia takes that as a challenge! at this point, she lets him live out of spite!
The only thing that distracts Leia from her anger is her friends being in trouble. She’s lucky she’s hanging around Luke Skywalker, honestly, or her anger would’ve taken hold of her ten chapters ago and never let her go. If Luke was a bit less of a damsel, Leia would never be distracted, it’s a symbiotic relationship-
Leia is supposed to be like Anakin. By which, I of course mean that Anakin is supposed to be like Leia. And I think they didn’t really have a choice, when it came to characterizing Anakin, but to make him more like Leia.
If they made Anakin act like Luke, Anakin would not have fallen to the Dark Side. This is for one primary reason: Luke slips and slides his way all across the galaxy except for the place where the fighting is actually actively taking place. If Anakin was like Luke, he would’ve gotten lost fifty times during the Clone Wars, inadvertently freed a LOT of people, and been late to all the events he had to witness in order to break.
He would have been late to Mustafar, okay? Obi-Wan and Padme would’ve been standing there for hours, waiting for him to show up. Then, Padme would get fed up and comm him like “Where are you, Ani? I’ve been on Mustafar-“ and he’d be like “Mustafar? Why are you on Mustafar? I’m over in Corellia. Crazy story! Palpatine told me to go murder some younglings, so I tried to do that, but I got distracted when I noticed some ducks that needed help crossing the street. But then, this big Rodian showed up and- well, long story short, the Jedi temple was empty when I got there, but I figured I should probably try and keep this gold pendant out of anyone’s hands-“ “What?” “-so after I spoke to you, I started getting ready to go to Mustafar, you know, to throw it into the lava, but my accelerator exploded and I tailspun my way out until I happened across a pirate ship-“
And it would just continue like that! Luke’s luck is either horrendous or tremendous, no matter how you look at it! That, or the Force is trying to cover his eyes because it doesn’t want its BABY to see anything BAD.
Anakin couldn’t be like Luke. The only choice was to make him more like Leia. More hot-tempered and more the type of person to walk into a firefight with little to no backup. Therefore, Anakin was made like Leia, and Leia, in return, in extraneous fiction, is made more like Anakin and I enjoy it a lot.
Also, my favourite part of the comic so far is: “How are we going to escape [the ship that we are currently destroying and that is floating in lava, Vader]?”
“By leaving the ship.”
Thank YOU, Anakin, your tactician’s brain never rests.
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coraniaid · 1 year
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I don't know how it's possible to watch Season 3 of Buffy and not notice that Buffy Summers is  consistently the one character most willing to come to Faith's defense, both before and after Allan Finch dies.
I mean, yes, I understand how in-universe it's possible for Faith to not notice this.  It's very natural that she doesn’t: Faith's a traumatized teenager with literally no support system.  She isn’t used to anybody else believing in her or caring about her. 
She’s somebody who is always willing to believe the worst of others (“all men are beasts”, “nine times out of ten the face [a person] is showing you is not the real one”).  And her own sense of self-worth is very fragile and deeply intertwined with her relationship with Buffy, fluctuating wildly between "I am better than everyone else (because I am a Slayer like Buffy)" and "every parental figure I've ever had has told me I was stupid and worthless and they were right (I will never be as good as Buffy)".  
So it's easy for her to interpret Buffy's overtures of friendship as rejections of a deeper connection, to take her suggestions that they should work together as judgments that Faith isn't good enough on her own and that she needs to act more like Buffy.
(And ... okay, yes, it’s also true that sometimes Buffy does judge Faith, and she does think Faith would be better off being at least a little bit more like her.  I think it’s clear that Buffy does care about Faith, and wants to protect her, but I don't think Buffy's perfect.  She's often afraid to express herself clearly or talk about her feelings, especially after what happened with Angelus in Season 2, and she does have a definite inclination to assume she knows best and that other people should just listen to her without question. She's a traumatized teenager too, even if that's not always quite so obvious.)
And crucially, Faith doesn't get to see Buffy defending her when she isn't around.
But the audience?  We do get to see that.  We see how much Buffy believes in Faith and how her first instinct is almost always to stick up for her.
We see it at the end of the first episode Faith appears in, when Buffy is talking to Giles about their fight with Kakistos.
Buffy: "[Faith] really came through in the end.   She had a lot to deal with, but she did it.  She got it behind her."
-- S3E03 | Faith, Hope & Trick
(This is also, as the episode makes clear, an example of Buffy comparing herself to Faith and deciding that she needs to follow the other Slayer’s example.  Which is something that Faith is convinced never happens.  But it does: when Faith isn’t there to see it.)
And after their fight in Revelations, we see Buffy admitting to Xander and Willow that she worries about Faith and wants to include her in the group more:
Xander: "How come Faith was a no show?"
Buffy: "Couldn't reach her ... again.  She hasn't been hanging out much."
Xander: "I detect worry."
Buffy; "A little bit.  Slaying's a rough gig."
-- S3E09 | The Wish
After Finch dies, Buffy is the one to tell Angel that Faith wants to be helped, and urge him not to give up on her:
Buffy: "How's she doing? ... You'll keep trying, right? ... I'll just go to Faith's and I'll get some of her stuff.  That way she'll see that we're on her side."
Angel: "Look, I don't want to get your hopes up, Buffy.  She may not want us to help her."
Buffy: "She does.  She just doesn't know how to say it."
-- S3E15 | Consequences
And at the end of the same episode, Buffy is again the one to persuade Giles that Faith’s actions in saving her from Trick show she deserves a chance at rehabilitation:
Buffy: "She could have left me there to die, Giles, but she didn't. ... I'm not gonna give up on her."
-- S3E15 | Consequences
And in the following episode, we see Buffy defend Faith to Willow and again talk about how similar they are.
Buffy: "[Faith] had it rough.  Different circumstances, that could be me."
-- S3E16 | Doppelgangland
And a couple of episodes later, when Buffy's attempting to talk herself out of the fear that Angel might be cheating on her with Faith, it's Faith who she tells herself wouldn't betray her, not the vampire she's actually dating.
Buffy: I went to Angel's last night and Faith was there.  They looked sort of intimate.
Willow: No way.  I know what you're thinking and no way.
Buffy:  You're right.  Faith would never do that.
-- S3E17 | Enemies
Even later on in the same episode, when Faith's actual collusion with the Mayor is revealed, Buffy's first reaction is to make excuses for her and then to implore her to listen to her:
Buffy: You don't know what you're doing ... Faith, listen to me ... I never knew you had so much rage in you.
-- S3E17 | Enemies
It's only after all of that that Buffy seems prepared to give up on Faith, and only in Graduation Day when Angel's life is on the line that she's actually willing to hurt her (earlier, in Choices, she’s still talking about ‘capturing’ Faith).  And when she does stab Faith, and Faith falls from the roof, seemingly to her death, it’s obvious from her reaction that Buffy immediately regrets this.  Even if she didn’t think she had any other choice, it isn’t how she wanted things to happen.
So honestly it kind of baffles me when I see people agreeing with the take that Buffy’s focus on how Faith might be feeling, when she hears that she’s woken up in This Year’s Girl, and her apparent hope that Faith might regret her past actions and want to change, is somehow something new.  That it isn’t perfectly in keeping with how Buffy’s always felt about Faith.  Or even that the idea of being willing to give people a second chance is something Buffy had to learn from Angel.
Because no, sorry, that's just totally backwards: Angel himself learned all that from Buffy.  
(Also, just logistically ... how would Buffy have learned anything from Angel at this point in Season 4 that she didn't already know back in Season 3, when – from her point of view, at least – she's barely spoken to him since he broke up with her and left town last season?)
Not just in regards to Faith, either, but the whole idea of needing to keep fighting for people and not give up on them, and how you have to keep doing that every day? Angel's whole mission statement (both the character and the show)? That's literally all taken from a speech Buffy gives Angel in Amends.  The show is very clear on this: it's Buffy who teaches Angel to be a better person, not the other way around.
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markrosewater · 2 years
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Not really a question, just sharing from the perspective of someone selling out and moving out of magic for a time, possibly forever.
Magic feels like its “not the product for me” anymore. It’s not really one thing; it’s changes that have chipped away what i do like about MtG over time. The thing that I wanted to share is that there are… anthology, I guess? games? Like Fortnite, Smash Bros, Kingdom Hearts, etc. where a selling point is that you mash all of these characters from these other IPs together and tell a story or play a game. And thats popular, I get that - but it was never for me. Magic adding other IPs like this takes it from an IP that wasn’t about this in some sense and turns it into a way that (apparently, will be?) about this. That’s the biggest thing turning me off from Magic as a whole at this point.
I get the concept that it’s a win for the (for example) Warhammer player who wants to play a card game, the Magic player who likes Warhammer, and saves the potential risk of creating a Warhammer Card Game that will inherently not reach a wide audience relative to magic. I just…. I just don’t enjoy the idea of playing Magic cards against Warhammer cards against Godzilla cards against Fortnite cards, or whatever is likely to end up happening. The flavor and power tuning mismatches bother me, and really the fundamental idea of trying to compare power levels of things from different IPs doesn’t appeal to me.
I hope this is useful feedback; i’m not really mad, just processing letting go of a game that I’ve played a very long time.
I get asked a lot why Magic players stick with the game as long as they do. The average length of a Magic player (now well over ten years) is longer than the average game exists. Why is that?
I believe the number one reason is the game’s evolution. It isn’t a game that sits still. It’s constantly adapting. It’s not the game I initially fell in love with in 1993. But then, my wife is not the woman I fell in love with back in 1996. In both cases, they changed and got even better.
One of the most endearing qualities of a trading card game is that the constant creation of new content allows the game to push into areas it hadn’t before. It lets the game grow. It allows it to adapt to the needs of its playerbase.
There’s a common misconception that R&D decides how the game changes. That we’re the arbiters of what the game should be. The reality is we’re just responding to what we’re hearing from the audience. Not necessarily what’s being said about what the game should be in social media posts, but more in watching how the game is played and talked about when the players are just enjoying it.
When Aaron first suggested Universes Beyond, it came from him watching the audience connect Magic with other IPs of their own accord. For example, one of the most popular pastimes on Blogatog has been people getting me to identify what colors characters from other IPs should be. Aaron wasn’t trying to make the players change to accommodate Magic, he was trying to make Magic change to accommodate the players.
I understand that as Magic constantly evolves, that it might shift away from what you, as an individual, most enjoy about the game. Trust me, living in a world focused on eternal Magic causes me all kinds of headaches, but I get it’s where the gestalt of Magic players want it to be. And I’ve learned to embrace and enjoy what others love about the game.
Every major shift scares some portion of the playerbase, because change is scary, but history has shown that when players give new things a chance, most grow to enjoy it. But not everyone. People drift away from the game for all sorts of reasons, and that’s okay.
I just suggest that some time in the future you peek your head back in and see where Magic is at. We’ll keep adapting and growing it, and maybe when you check us out again, like the game, you might be in a different place, and you’ll find a connection as you did when you first found the game.
Thank you for all your years of playing. I hope one day to see you again, but even if I don’t, I’m glad Magic was able to be the game you loved for as long as it was. Hearing that means a lot to me.
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boyfhee · 2 years
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🗗 UNLIKELIHOOD | chapter five
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PRECIS. the chances of you confessing to your crush sums to zero when you realise you have to pretend to have a crush on sunghoon, just to help your friend hide her feelings for the ice prince.
or, alternatively, in which you borrow an eraser from your friend, yi kyeong, which has sunghoon’s name written on it ( or so you think ) so, when the mentioned boy sees it, you have no other choice but to lie that you have a crush on him to avoid disclosing your friend’s secret.
GENRE. humour, fluff, angst if you squint hard enough, coming of age
WARNINGS. slight angst, reader being insecure, sunghoon ( bc he's so cheesy gn ) lmk if you spot more ( 4.7k )
PREV | | MASTERLIST
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the thought of dating sunghoon is ambiguous. 
you aren’t even close to it. sunghoon said he would ask you out again, but you decided to assist him and kyeong in their council work, which was rescheduled on the day you and sunghoon were supposed to have your ‘date.’ you didn’t plan to spend the day with him, honestly. despite his multiple requests to come over to his place with yi kyeong, you refused to agree until ten minutes before they planned to meet. you don’t know what convinced you to agree. perhaps, it’s the stagnant picture of the two of them in your head, maybe it’s the fact that you had nothing to do and going over to sunghoon seemed better than sleeping throughout the noon. 
after arriving at his place, you realised that it was jealousy that drove you to his house; or rather, an utter sense of diffidence that plagued your mind. something about watching kyeong and sunghoon work together pulled you away from the thought that you and sunghoon can be something more than friends. however, despite being aware of sunghoon’s feelings for you, you can’t help but believe in the possibility of him and yi kyeong. 
“how’s council work going?” you ask as the two of you stroll down to your house since sunghoon insisted on walking you back even though you said it wasn’t necessary. these are the times when you think he pays you a lot more attention than necessary, more than you deserve, even. you notice the way your steps are in sync before he stops to take a look at a stray cat sneaking into someone’s garden, and the next step he takes doesn’t match yours anymore. 
“it’s good.” he replies, and although you can’t see his face now that he’s walking a step in front of you, you could hear the smile in his voice. “kyeong is good at what she does. i’m assuming we can wrap it up by tomorrow.” 
your grasp around his hand tightens, fingers interlaced and yet you could feel the distance in between. his words leave a sour taste in your mouth. however, in any case, you can't deny how capable your friend is. it’s only normal for people to compliment her, and in sunghoon’s case, you presume that he can relate after meeting someone on the same spectrum as him. “right, she’s efficient.”
“i thought she would be, i don’t know, cold? she looks indifferent but is actually really fun to—” and you stop, causing him to do the same as he halts in the middle of his sentence, lowering his head to get a better look at your expression. “is something wrong?” 
“no?,” you shoot him a forced smile. “i’m just thinking how you two would make a good couple,” you say, because the thought of dating sunghoon is ambiguous. it’s almost as if every second with him reminds you that you don’t belong here.
“you’re back at this again,” there’s annoyance laced in his voice and you wonder if your actions have finally broken his shell. after all, there’s only so much a person can put up against your sheer persistence. “i don’t care about yi kyeong, or how good or bad we look together. i like you—”  
“why?” your voice shoots up a few octaves, loud enough to turn a few heads in your direction as the passersby assume it to be just another lover’s quarrel. “sunghoon, everything reminds me of how different we are. i try to not overthink but then i look at you and kyeong and realise how i came between the two of you.” 
you see everything come down falling. it feels nice, for some reason. now that he’s in front of you, standing with an expression that ranges between anger and disappointment while you’re finally able to voice your thoughts, you don’t feel like this is bad enough. after all, communication is the key, and unsaid words only give rise to unwanted strains in a relationship. even though you knew nothing could be made out of whatever you and sunghoon have, you want to end it on a good note for the sake of both of you. 
for the next few minutes, you talked and he listened. you aren’t sure if you were making sense. you didn’t know if you were processing your own words, it all sounded like an information dump— just like when you’re assigned a task and when asked about it, your supervisor drops each and every thing about it on you like an explosive, and you’re left to find the starting point. looking at his face, you discern that sunghoon must be feeling the same way. 
it pains you to see him like this— limbs on side as if they’re lifeless, an ocean of dejection in his eyes; as if the words are on the tip of his tongue but he doesn’t know what to say, you can see it on his face. you wish you didn’t have to see him like this, not when you are the reason behind the lack of delight on his face. you know you should’ve stopped this earlier, you wish you could, and you were a step away from having him out of your life, but he looks at you once and you gravitate towards him like a moon does to its planet.   
“yn, listen to me.” he cups your face in his hands, conquering your line of sight to the point he’s the only thing you could see. however, your vision had blurred from the tears dwelling in your eyes. “i like you. i wouldn’t even have talked to her if it wasn’t for the student council—”
“i don’t deserve you,” another interjection, another pang to his heart, your voice cracks— another line of conversation.  
“when you say that, it makes me want to show you how much you deserve me and the other things you wish,” he holds your face even closer, as if you’re going to disappear the next moment. 
it’s as if you both were cursed or just plain unlucky. you have your ideas about love, and he has his; and as much as you tried, none of you could make it work. you don’t think it’s the lack of feeling or intention that’s tearing you both apart— it’s one small seed of doubt planted in your head, and it’s doing its job. you brush his hands off your face, looking him in the eyes for one last time. “let’s stop,” 
.
.
.
“you look as if the life inside of you has been sucked out, and it’s only nine,” yi kyeong comments as soon as the class dismisses. you don’t pay attention to her words, letting a sigh roll off your lips to suffice as a response. “fight with sunghoon?” 
“no,” it’s a quick response and you don’t care if she believes you or not, even though the chances are that she most likely doesn’t. as much as you wish you could talk to her, you don’t think you can bring yourself to tell her your concerns regarding her and sunghoon. having her by your side was a little nicer than being alone, but you decide to push her away this once, now that your worries can potentially cost you an invaluable friendship. 
her gaze rests upon you for a brief second before she shakes her head in hopelessness— disappointment, at most— mumbling a faint ‘whatever’ which is carried away by the winds as soon as the word escapes his mouth. you don’t care, if you put it quite frankly. the lingering whispers of students in the hallways that talk about you and sunghoon, or how they haven’t seen you with him for over a week now, don’t bother you anymore. you’ve learnt to ignore then and this time, the stars seemed to have aligned in your favour. 
sunghoon had to leave for inter-prefectural volleyball league the day you turned him down, albeit indirectly. you wanted to see him— still want to— and you almost strolled down to his place when he returned, which was two days prior from today. you’ve learnt to hold yourself back, accepting that there’s no point aiming for something out of your reach. you and sunghoon are like stars in the distant sky. they attract, and when they get closer than they should’ve, it results in an explosion, consequently destroying everything within the close radius. even after sunghoon returned to school, you’ve held yourself away from him, avoiding places he frequently visits. you even stopped going to the terrace in case he looks for you there. 
you take a step away from sunghoon and you notice sunghoon’s world is beautiful as always; with or without you, it doesn’t matter. 
“kyeong, what do you think of sunghoon?” it’s an impromptu question, one that leaves her staring at you with perplexed eyes; but you’re too lost in your thoughts to even reconsider your words. 
yi kyeong furrows her eyebrows and you wonder if she got a hint of what’s going inside your head. it wouldn’t be surprising if she does, honestly. kyeong has a good perception, and perhaps that’s the only reason why you’ve been avoiding her eyes for almost a week now. “and why are you asking that?” 
“just answer the question.”  
“i think of him . . . as your boyfriend.” the hint of playfulness is evident in her words, yet her eyes tell you otherwise.   
“can you be serious for one second?” you counter with annoyance as you shut your notebook close, putting the pens back in your pencil case. after the argument with sunghoon, hearing someone address him as your boyfriend puts you off. not that the two of you ever dated, but the thought of it was good while it lasted.
“serious about what, sunghoon?” she chuckles and at this point, you’re convinced that she’s using your dilemma as a way of comedic relief. “yn, i don’t even think about him unless it’s regarding council stuff.” 
perhaps, the last part is supposed to comfort you, though it mingles with the chatters and soon enough, slips out of your mind as if you never heard it. timing is irrelevant for two people who are meant for each other, that is what you once believed. but you and sunghoon met during a time when you were such a mess, and had so much to figure out. you were busy getting a hold of your life while living a lie you told to save your friend, although it got you entangled deeper in the mess; and now just days later sunghoon is claiming to have fallen for you. it sounds euphoric, but how could you believe it when everything around you reminds you of the possibility that you and sunghoon were, maybe, always meant to meet, yet not meant to be? 
“by the way, tell him i won’t be able to make it tomorrow since i’m busy,” kyeong’s voice pull your out of your thoughts. 
a heavy feeling settles inside of you. “make it to where—” 
“just tell him, he knows,” she runs out of the class as she always does, probably to seonghwa’s class because lately, her priorities have shifted towards the senior in question, now that they’ve gotten closer after the play. however, you don’t fail to notice how both sunghoon and yi kyeong have been keeping things from you, like just now. you don’t pay it no mind, you really try to, but a part of your mind comes up with the chances that they could’ve been meeting without your knowledge. 
you find yourself on the way to the terrace once again, after avoiding the location like a plague for days on repeat now. turns out, you couldn’t keep yourself away from it, for that’s the only place you feel like you’ll be able to breathe in when every other corner feels suffocating. a part of the reasons for your ventures to the rooftop is to get rid of all the baseless thoughts you’ve been coming up with. putting everything aside, doubting your best friend is the last thing you want to do. you don’t want to believe them, but you don’t have to hold onto a false hope either. 
somewhere inside the back of your mind, you’re reminded to get back to class, though you don’t pay attention to that voice. you don’t want to go back inside the four walls and sit with the two people who are the reason behind all your worries, albeit you feel guilty for thinking of them this way. to put it in better words, you wouldn’t be able to focus either, for your mind is too busy thinking about everything else. and so, you let the soft winds soothe your mind as you lean against the railing, the cold metal against your cheeks as you close your eyes in an attempt to think about anything but the boy you wish to hear from the most at the moment. 
“i looked for you all ‘round the school, y’know?” sunghoon’s voice pop up from the entrance, making you flinch at his sudden arrival. it frightens you how you didn’t hear his footsteps approaching as you always do. however, those feelings wash away with the waves of cold breeze brushing against your nape, sending shivers down your spine. 
it reminds you of the day you had confessed to him, and you had dragged him to the rooftop, same location in the exact same weather, where he had rejected you before frankly asking you to give him a chance at getting to know you better. the day, all you could think about were the points about how sunghoon is so likeably unlikeable. you had always thought of him as a foreign creation, something made so intricately with extreme focus so as to avoid all chances of faults and mistakes. sunghoon, to you, wasn’t someone who you despised because of your differences or rather, how perfect he is. dislike would be a strong word to summarise the emotions you initially had towards him, indifference would be a better term. 
albeit, you find it humorous how your feelings towards the said boy have changed over the span of just a few weeks. you wouldn’t say it’s because you ‘fell’ for sunghoon, but rather because you got a chance to look at him without filters. it’s as if you got a chance to meet him backstage, away from all the roles he has to play about being an ideal student and an ideal child for every parent out there. yeah, maybe his kindness and captivating personality played a role in changing your opinions towards him but, most of it has been because you were able to notice the puddles of similarities between him and above, above the impression that sunghoon and you belonged to different worlds. 
“if you’ve noticed, i always come to the rooftop if i don’t feel well,” you mumble above the sound of wind howling around with slight disappointment evident in your voice. perhaps, after all this time, you had at least expected him to look for you on the rooftop everyday, knowing that the only place you’d ever choose to hide yourself is under the vast expanse of sky, in front of the cityscape. 
“is that your test paper?” he asks, pointing his index finger towards your hand, and that’s the moment you realise you’ve been holding onto it for a while now. sunghoon takes it from your hand with slight hesitation in his actions as if he’s taking all the measures to not provoke you. however, the words that leave his mouth suffice of all the incitement his actions could’ve offered. “geez, you’re getting scores in single digits.” 
a chuckle rolls off his tongue as he goes through your answers, making you groan before you snatch the paper from his hands. “it’s my first time,” 
there’s an undertone of solicited jealousy in your voice, a glint of anger seeping through because even if your scores have always been a few levels before sunghoon’s, they never hit the single digits until now. you wonder if he would believe you if you said you always received perfect scores up until second year of middle school. call it a change in air or whatever, but switching schools in the middle of your elementary school years turned out to be an awful choice since your grades fell down by a few percent; and despite being able to recover them to the point where you could maintain a reputable position in your grade, they never reached the same height again as they used to. 
much to your and your parents’ disappointment, your grades declined further in highschool. while the reason could be the extreme curriculum that high schoolers have to follow, you like to blame sunghoon for that. you’ve been in the same class as him for two years now and every time he receives an award, something inside of you dies. you aren’t jealous of his achievements, nor do you think he doesn’t deserves the compliments and honours he gets. you spent two years looking for the reason behind your indifference towards the campus crush, only to realise that you’ve been maintaining your distance because he reminds you of everything you could’ve been if things didn’t go the wrong way. 
sunghoon sighs, pressing more of his weight against the railings, leaning towards the as in an attempt to look further down. “you should get a tutor before finals. i mean, i’m always down to—”   
“can you stop acting like nothing happened?” you cut him off, half-annoyed, half-impatient. originally, you wanted to stop talking about academics; but then it occurs to you how normal sunghoon is, as if you didn’t have an argument and haven’t been talking for almost a week now. while you admire him for his ability to strike a conversation in all situations, even under heavy circumstances, something about it this time didn’t sit right with you. 
“what happened?” he asks, but it’s almost as if he has been expecting you to ask you this question. 
and at the same time, you hope he doesn’t find you weird for bringing this up after you’ve told him to call it quits on you. “i broke up with y—” 
“we weren’t even dating in the first place,” ouch, you think, and it didn’t occur to you how hurtful it sounds until you heard it from sunghoon himself. “and if you think i’m giving up just because you think i look better with yi kyeong, then you’re wrong.” 
“do you ever just look at me and wonder why you fell for me?” you let your words replace the silence looming above you and sunghoon, allowing your eyes to meet his’ as if they’re having a conversation of their own. “because i do,” 
“i’m not as good as you— not even close to being as good as you. i was an average student and now i’m getting scores in single digits, i’m neither good at art, nor at sports. i’m not as kind as you, i get into fights, get detentions, i can’t help you with council works, i can’t help you with anything because you already know how to do everything.” there’s a smile dancing on your face for some reason. perhaps, you’re hoping for him to realise his worth, finally accepting that he deserves someone better thank you. “don’t you think you deserve someone who is almost, if not as, perfect as you?” 
another trail of silence follows as you attempt to decipher the look on his face. you take a step back, running your mind all over the mess you’ve created, and you end up wondering— what’s the point of this? you’ve been selfish for so long, it shouldn’t hurt to stay that way for a tad bit longer. even before you had realised your feelings for sunghoon, you were aware of the impossibility of the two of you; so being selfish in this case was a luxury you never had the chance to choose. it was a game of push and pull from the start. you spent days playing with his heart, making him believe that you were desperately in love with him, and when you tell him the truth, sunghoon accepts it like just another as-a-matter-of-fact about life. that’s when you realised you didn’t deserve sunghoon, not by a long shot. 
perhaps, you don’t deserve sunghoon at all, not even the small parts of him you’ve been able to experience over the past few weeks. you don’t know if you’d be able to continue living your life the same way without sunghoon, watching him pursue someone else— someone better— but it’s everything you wish for him. while sunghoon is everything you’ll ever need, you can’t have him settle for someone less. after all, nothing in the world could compensate for the shortfall.    
“is that how you think of me?” he chuckles as if you cracked a joke. sunghoon doesn’t spare you a glance for the next few seconds, letting his eyes linger over the invisible patterns he’s creating with his fingers, on the railing. there’s a desist but you don’t think he’s waiting for an answer to his question. it’s like a verbal punctuation, like a semicolon before he exhales heavily, turning his gaze back to you.
“yn, did you know i failed in english in middle school?” he begins just like any one another as a matter-of-fact conversation he would initiate during lessons. “i’m good at sketching but not at painting, i do even the simplest of calculations on paper, can’t spell assassination without autocorrect—” 
“no way,” you interject, letting your eyebrows crease as you look at him in disbelief. well, of course, you wouldn’t think park sunghoon would have trouble spelling assassination, if anything. 
“yes way, i really can’t.” he clarifies, emphasising the ‘really’ to make sure it sounds believable. “i once burned coffee, i have terrible sleeping habits, i’m lazy, i fight with my sister all the time, was almost suspended in primary school for beating a kid and—” another impromptu pause and he takes a step towards you, leaning closer than you already were, resting his forehead against yours. “— i’m in love with you.”   
it sounds like a heavenly confession in the way his eyes look into yours as if you’re the only thing worth looking at. his hands slip into yours at the right moment, giving your heart the push it needed to pace relentlessly as if it knew no boundaries. his lips curl into a lovesick smile as he interlocks his fingers with yours. “i think we make a perfect match.” 
you slide your hand out of his’, “you sure do know how to shut me up,” 
“and i know of many ways to do that,” you could see his signature smirk from your peripheral vision, something that makes you smile involuntarily.
the two of you bask in silence as it blankets you under the comfort it’s offering. you hate being in situations where there’s no absolute answer and your mind keeps oscillating between two choices that you can’t bring yourself to choose from. it’s humorous and equally irritating how one moment, you think you’d be just fine without sunghoon and the next, you feel like drowning when he’s not next to you. perhaps, it’s the mood of time, the feeling of forever. the belief that you both could live and die by your word and never regret a thing. from what you could decipher, sunghoon has always been in love with everything around him when he waltzed into your life as if it’s his own; and now that you’re taking your steps into his, slowly and gradually, all you want is to be a part of that. you would wake up thinking about how sunghoon and you are like parallel lines— always close, but never together, but then you’d go to bed with the belief that somewhere, in some timeline, perhaps your paths were meant to intersect. you wouldn’t say it is love, but you couldn’t say it isn’t either.  
at times, you wonder why sunghoon chose you, and it’s beyond your insecurities about academics and things that separate him from you. it’s rather a rhetorical question, one that sunghoon, probably, has already answered, but you couldn’t help but ask again— why me. you have always been a nuisance to those who know you. despite receiving unconditional love from your parents and relatives, one would always hear them complain about how much of a bother you could be. however, you’ve never heard sunghoon complain about it. it’s as if he knows you can be handful, but then again, his hands are always empty when it comes to you. you’re pretty sure you wouldn’t pursue yourself if you were in sunghoon’s shoes. you’re too busy being lost in your own worries and concerns that you can’t see the person who adores you to death; and if somehow you do, then it’s impossible for you to believe you could be of so much important to someone that they’re willing to embrace single piece of you as if it belongs to the museum. 
“yn, get that you’re scared. you might feel that we won’t make it and that’s okay. i’m not asking you to disregard your worries. i respect them, and in return, i’m asking you to respect me.” sunghoon says out of the blue, replacing the silence with his melodic voice. “you don’t have to give an answer now. we can stay the way we’ve been, no labels, i won’t force anything upon you. in other words, i’m asking you to let me like you—” 
“and then one day when i suddenly feel up to it, i’ll accept you then,” you cut him off, there’s a smile on your face before you playfully hit his arm. “seriously, sunghoon? quoting a dialogue right now?” 
“i mean it, though.” he pulls you into a hug, chin resting above your head as he draws circles on your back, and you give in as if there’s no better place in the world than his arms. you may not be sure about him, or your feelings for him, but if it means you can spend a few more seconds in his arms, then you don’t mind reconsidering your decisions. 
“i love you,” his voice is no louder than a whisper and, you’re sure it wouldn’t have been audible if you weren’t next to him, with his arms around you. “i apologise for taking so much time to say this, and it’s fine if you think it’s rushed. take your time and sort your feelings. all i know is that i love you, i always have, and all i’m asking you is to let me love you.” 
his last four words ring in your head like an alarm. you look up, his grip loosens around your waist but never lets you out of his hands— there’s a puddle of emotion in his eyes. you see love, you see sadness, and fear, it’s a given. a smile rests on his lips but you could feel the hesitation in his fingertips soak through your shirt and exude through your skin. his words are the same, but it’s the first time you think of the possibility that maybe, he’s scared too. the future is predetermined and nothing could refute fate’s design. but if, even for a brief second, you can have the opulence of stars aligning in your favour, then you’d want to welcome it with arms wide open and a heart ready to walk into the storm. 
“can i kiss you?” albeit not the words you wanted to say at the moment, you don’t mind the intent. however, your doubts cave in when his hands ghost up your waist, feet taking a step away from you without a second thought. 
“no,” it feels like your heart has stopped. “you’re scoring in single digits. i think you should focus on academics instead of wanting to kiss a guy,” 
“gosh, sunghoon. that’s brutal.” and the very next second, it comes back to life as your lips curl into a smile. “are you going to tutor me?” 
“yes,” you chuckle at the cheery smile on his face as he takes your hand in his, planting a soft kiss on your palms. “and we can kiss after your studies.” well, it’s unlikely that you’d be able to get a good score in just three months, especially now that you have sunghoon to serve as the main source of distraction; but the unlikelihood of falling in love with him? zero, because you realise that he has always been in love with you and you just caught up to him. 
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NOTE. i think the writing here is so ass but aaaaaa it's over finally !! kudos to me completing a series lmao the commitment had me going crazy. i decided to go with the open ending unlike how it's in the original show for a change ( and it felt weird to announce that they're together after yn spent last 3 chapters drowning in insecurities and utter disbelief that sunghoon is in love with them ) thank you to everyone who chose to read this ^_^
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whump-me · 9 months
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Martyr, Chapter 29: Better Things to Die For
Chapter 29 of Martyr, a novel-length sci-fi whump story about a captured Martian rebel with a secret and the renowned interrogator who has waited a decade for the chance to break him. This series is best read in order. Masterpost here.
Contains: whumper POV, restraints, interrogation, aftermath of severe injury, verbal sparring, emotional whump, character death
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Isadora
He raised his eyebrows. “Oh, really? Where do you see it going from here, then? Because all I see is a stalemate—one that probably ends with you finishing what you started. I don’t know—seems like a waste of time for both of us.” He tried for his old cocky tone, but it didn’t quite land. The fear underneath was too plain. He had gotten a taste of death now, and despite his brave words, he didn’t want another.
She understood.
“You might be surprised,” she said. This time, it wasn’t anger that made it hard for her to keep her voice steady. She wished she knew what this emotion was that she kept having to swallow down. But it wasn’t entirely unpleasant.
“You’ve recovered surprisingly quickly,” she continued. “You exceeded the medical team’s expectations—and mine. It would be easy for someone to underestimate your current capacities. Even me.”
He watched her with his dark eyes, a small frown of incomprehension appearing between his brows. He said nothing.
 “For instance,” she continued, as another surge of something surged up from her chest and into her throat, “I might assume you can’t move quickly with your bones still healing. I might get careless and leave an opening for you to get the drop on me, like you did on the day you convinced me to undo your restraints. If I don’t stop you in time, you might even get your hands on my weapon. After all, I might forget I never got around to breaking all your fingers, and that you have enough strength left in your hands now to pull a trigger.”
The frown between Wraith’s eyes grew.
“It’s a good thing you’re restrained this time, of course,” she continued. “Then again, you’re not as much of a threat as you used to be. Double-checking your restraints wasn’t a priority, and I’ve had a busy morning. I might have forgotten to do something as simple as lock your cuffs. I don’t often make mistakes like that, but no one is perfect.”
Wraith just sat there frowning at her. She let out a harsh huff of a sigh. “Hurry up about it, will you? And please, for both our sakes, make it quick—and make it certain.” When he still didn’t move, she snapped, “you can’t tell me I overestimated your intelligence this badly.”
Finally, he tested the cuffs. They fell away as his wrists sprang free. He stared down at them like he thought he was imagining the whole thing.
But he still didn’t move. What was wrong with him? “What is this?” he asked in a low voice. “What are you trying to pull?”
Did she have to do everything for him? “What do you think? I’ve spelled it out for you pretty well, wouldn’t you say?”
“What do I think? I think it’s another game you’re playing with me. I know you don’t think too highly of my intelligence, but don’t insult us both by acting like I would actually believe you want to help me escape.” He shook his head. “Are you looking for another excuse to hurt me? Is that it? I wouldn’t have thought you needed one, but if that’s what you want, you’re out of luck.” He opened his uncuffed hands to her. “I’m done giving you what you want. I’m done playing your game.”
Even to the last, he was going to insist on making things difficult for her. Of course he was—she shouldn’t have expected that anything involving this prisoner would go easily. She sagged in her chair, the weight of ten years settling on her shoulders all at once. “There is no game. Not anymore. I’m done.”
“Come on, Isadora. I’m not buying that. You expect me to believe you want me to shoot you and make a run for it?”
She stared into his eyes, and took no pleasure in his instinctive flinch. “Yes,” she said. “That’s exactly what I want. I thought I made that plain to you. Most people in your position would have gone for it already, but apparently you’ve grown to like it here a little too much.”
He still didn’t move. “Tell me what this is about, Isadora. I’m going to sit here until you do.”
She let out her breath through her teeth. “You want to know what it’s about? Fine. You’re not the only one who spent the past ten years thinking you’re doing one thing when you’re really doing another. I thought I was… well. You know. You’re the one who told me.” She cringed at the unexpected roughness in her voice. She looked away.
She forced her gaze back to his as she continued. “I don’t know the first thing about being a hero, it turns out. But I imagine helping a prisoner escape—a prisoner who was in prison for something he didn’t do, and then tortured and nearly beaten to death—is a start. I’d like to know how it feels.” She gritted her teeth. “Even if—from what I suspect of what your career has involved—you deserve everything that’s happened to you in here and more.”
She looked away again—intentionally, this time. She stared at the wall and waited for him to make his move. But he still didn’t take the hint. She clenched her jaw tighter.
“A victory is hollow when someone hands it to you,” he said.
His prison uniform rustled softly as he stood. She wanted to look at him. She didn’t.
“But he was always the one who cared about rules and invisible tallies,” said Wraith. “He’s kind of like you that way. Me, I’ve only ever cared about survival.”
She forced herself not to react to the sound of his footsteps. Her heart beat out a hollow rhythm in her ears.
Then came a sharp tug at her side as he wrenched her gun away clumsily with his badly healed hands. She pressed her palms tightly to the arms of the chair as her heart sped up further. She tried to take a deep breath, but her lungs were suddenly frozen shut.
She waited for the shot, and wondered if she would feel it. But it didn’t come. Instead, she heard Wraith’s voice in her ear, and felt his breath hot against the nape of her neck. “I could get revenge if I wanted to,” he said. “I could pay you back for everything you did to me, and everything you’ve done to my friends over the past decade.”
Finally, she turned her head to look at him. His eyes didn’t burn with the rage she expected. Something sharper and more tangled surged there, a match for the messy feelings swirling in her own gut. “And I could fight back if I wanted to,” she answered. He had her gun in his hands, but she was fast from years of relentless training, and he was still slow from his injuries.
She stared at the gun, waiting for him to just get on with it, but he didn’t. “I’m not a good man like he is,” he said. “You shouldn’t put your faith in me to give you an easy end.”
“I stand by what I said before,” Isadora answered. “You’re better than him. You’ll die for what matters to you, instead of forcing others to do it for you.” She hesitated. “You’re better than me.”
Wraith curled his lip in a silent snarl. Apparently he still had some illusions left about his leader after all. But all he said was, “I don’t intend to die.”
“Then get on with it,” she said, her fingers clutching at the chair. “Before I change my mind.” Another few seconds of this, and she would wrench the gun from his hands and shoot him just to make the frenetic pounding of her heart slow down.
He pressed the barrel of the gun to her temple. She closed her eyes. But the shot still didn’t come.
“How do I get out of here?” he asked. “There’s no sense in me giving you what you want if I don’t get anything out of it. If your guards are just going to tackle me before I get two steps out of this room, you’ll have to find someone else to put a bullet in your head. I’m not letting them punish me for your death. There are better things to die for.”
At that, her lips curved in a slight smile. So he was smarter than she had thought after all.
“It’s a straight shot from here to the back entrance,” she said. “I’ve turned off the cameras and disabled the door code for the next hour. The exit will open onto the tunnels. Take a right and follow the tunnel to the end. You can find your own way from there.” No access card.
The sound of his breathing was louder than her own heartbeat. “You’re wrong about me, you know,” he finally said. “I’m not good like him. I’ll put my own interests above truth and justice any day. And that’s good for you—because it means I’m not going to waste my chance to escape by sticking around to give you the justice you deserve.”
The gun dug deeper into her temple.
She let out her breath slowly in relief.
She never got a chance to finish her exhale.
The end came as a bright starburst of light—no sound, just overwhelming brightness and a strange painless pressure. It went on for a fraction of a second that lasted an eternity.
Then there was nothing.
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clatoera · 1 year
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Always Remember We’re Burned for Better Chapter 9: Everything Was Slipping Right Out of Our Hands
....hey.
So so sorry for yet another incredibly late update. I’m honestly drowning with school. I might end up having to push my boards back because I am simply not yet ready. Ya girl is STRESSED. 
As always, title from a Taylor Swift song --> Mine
AO3 Link
Masterpost
As always. BIG thank you to @ohhowwehavefallen who literally talks about Clato all day every day with me across multiple apps. @afterfawn who DIRECTLY gets credit for helping me with the training flashback, you’re brilliant my friend. And @ms1818 as usual. 
Thank you all SO much for your patience. I hope this was worth it.  (Only one more chapter until the quell how did we get here and can you believe the story was originally supposed to START at the quell? wild).
There are ten of them gathered in a board style room on the top floor of the District Two training center. There is an eerie energy amongst the ten surviving victors, as they gather around and commence the yearly confirmation of tributes.  This time though, instead of choosing the two teens who have given their lives to this honor, they choose from amongst their own ranks.
Five men. Five Women.
It was a pride of district two, to have ten living victors. Historically they had the most victors of any district in the entire history of the games, always in close competition with One but always inching out just ahead. There were more before these ten, who are no longer amongst the category of living victor.
Soon that number would be four and four. Four and Five if they are lucky.
“We need to discuss this. We could vote, as usual, after a round of performance.” ‘The discussion is initiated by one of the older Victors, back from the games right before the last Quarter Quell, Lyme. She has always been well respected– her opinion over tribute selection one of the most appreciated and revered. She had hand picked Enobaria in her childhood, as well as Clove’s mother. Ultimately she had even given her support and blessing behind Clove and Cato’s selection when they had been merely ten years old.
Crazy, really. Exactly ten years later and they were back where they began. Two well trained kids with weapons in their hands and no future with the other in it.
“Most of us are out of practice. We should send the youngest two. They just won. They’ve got the best chance. It’s a Quarter Quell, after all. A victor coming from two is an absolute must.” Comes from a male victor about the same age as Lyme. He had been the one who a decade ago directly suggested to Brutus to take on Cato as a trainee. He had been the one to see that same brutal force in them both.
“Those two.” He points towards the youngest of the victors, settled side by side, sandwiched between their own mentors on either side of them. “We picked them together and then split their games explicitly because we knew both would win. They’re the best choice.”
“It will be a vote. We just need to decide the parameters on which we decide.” Lyme insists, rising to stand at the head of the circular boardroom table, an ever commanding presence that just makes you listen and obey.
“I don’t know why we’re wasting time over parameters and a vote. It’s Cato and Clove. They’re the youngest. They’re the most recently out of training.” The middle aged man once again insists, crossing strong arms over his broad chest. There was a clear lineage from mentor to mentee from Him to Brutus to Cato himself.  “They’re the obvious choice.”
“They also have their entire lives ahead of them.” Enobaria, for all she composes herself, nearly snaps at the pool of victors. “That's exactly the point. They’re kids. Let them live their lives now. They have earned it, just as we all have.”
“We have families and ties to this district.” There’s a red headed woman Clove vaguely remembers from old clips. She had won a few years before Clove had been born, and was one of her mother’s mentors sixteen years ago. “I’m sorry, it’s very unfortunate that you are so young, but you have to understand. Some of us have families, we have entire lives built here.”
“Well we haven’t been given the chance to do that!” Clove is the one of the two who finally interjects, though without the fire that is so synonymous with the name Clove Kentwell. There is a power hierarchy, one that the newly minted victors have not yet earned their way into.
Even now, adult victors themselves, they were still thrown back to those good little soldiers they were raised to be.
And these, well, these were the victors who watched their training sessions.
Who voted for their selection.
Who taught them the proper technique for holding a sword and slipping out of a headlock.
They had been raised to revere them. Respect them.
That was part of training. You don’t argue with the decisions, you don’t question them. Especially not The Victors.
Even now a peer in this exclusive group– these were still The Victors they were taught to fear and revere.
“We aren’t being given the chance.” Clove doubles down, a softness in her voice that is so uncharacteristic of the strong spirited woman she is.. “I only won two years ago, Cato only three. We haven’t had the chance to do the things you all have..”
“I have a sister. I have parents. That's not family enough?” Cato adds, leaning forward to place his elbows on the table. “That's family enough in the eyes of the Capitol. A sister is plenty enough family for that girl from twelve.”
“You’re missing the point.” The redheaded woman interrupts, a sharp tone in her voice. Demanding. Controlling. “Yes, it’s sad, but one of you will get to come home and live out the rest of your lives. You just have to win.”
“You two trained together, your entire life, for this. What an honor it should be to get to represent your District a second time. To become the first two time victor in the history of the games.” The oldest male of the victors, a man probably in his sixties reminds them. “It is an honor to be chosen as the volunteers. You have such a unique opportunity to bring us so much pride.”
“Do we get a choice, or are you just going to talk over us?” Cato slams his fist on the table, demanding the attention of all the remaining victors. In another life the two of them would have become the leaders of this group in the future, demanding the respect of all those who came after.
“Maybe we should send the weakest. The oldest, with the least to offer the district anymore. Clove and I could always become trainers. That would be the way for us to bring pride to the district– ensuring future victors. I can’t say the same for some of you. Past your prime and clinging to glory days.”
Cato scoffs, shaking his head with a clenched jaw, bracing himself for the argument he has unleashed. “None of you want to go in because you know you don’t have a shot at winning. When it’s your fifteen years out of practice against Katniss Everdeen who can kill from twenty yards, you know you don’t have a chance.” There is rage in his voice, the kind that comes just before the outburst. The edge of warning that very few are even lucky enough to have. “You’re sacrificing us.”
“That is NOT the attitude of a Career Tribute.” The remaining male interjects. He had won in the years preceding Enobaria, but had never made much of an accolade for himself. He trained the spears lessons at the academy occasionally, but had been relatively low key in terms of life of a victor.
Clove absently remembers the tulips in his yard, which she ran past every morning on her run of shame back to the academy.  
No, maybe that was not the attitude of the teens who were told their whole lives that nothing was greater than winning the hunger games. But it is the attitude of two people who are being robbed of the joy that accomplishment was supposed to allow.
“We aren’t career tributes anymore.” Clove announces, whipping her head up to look at them. “We are victors. We are victors like the rest of you. We earned our place here. We aren��t potential tributes anymore.”
“You are. We all are.” The remaining woman, a girl about the same age Clove’s mother would be, announces. Distantly, Clove can remember her name being something stupid. Justice, maybe?
She reminds Clove of Glimmer, with her long blonde hair and high pitched voice, and for a moment Clove wonders if these conversations were being held in District One right now as well.  “I’m not going. I have a three year old, he needs his mother.”
“Yeah, well you let my mother go when she had a three year old who needed her mother, so I don’t see how this is any fucking different.” Clove snaps, hands grasping and releasing a pen in her hand before she risks letting it fly into the eye of the next victor to offer them up like sacrificial lambs. “Maybe fair is fucking fair.”
“It’s not our fault your mother died, Clove.”
“Who fucking chose her to go?” Funny, the same people who marched her mother to her death were now sending her.
“I for one think there should be skills involved.” Brutus levels, waving a hand in embellishment. “We should all present ourselves like we do to the game-makers.” He shoots a look to Cato, that anyone else would have missed, had it not been for the long standing relationship between the two. “See who is in the best place to go into these games.”
Cato gives the briefest of a nod, a single jerk of his head. Throw it. Throw the trial. Throw the trial and let someone else go prove their point.
“And who would vote? The academy children?” Lyme questions, raising a light eyebrow at the group. “Certainly not. We are their superiors.”
“They could. Let them decide. They’re well trained. They know what to look for.” One of the others agrees, before the eldest male once again shuts them down.
“We are going to vote. Right here. If there is a tie then we will hold such a competition. There's no need for all that fanfare if we can reach a majority without it.”
“And what if the winners refuse to volunteer.” Enobaria suggests, a sinister smile smirk on her face.. “There will be a reaping. There is no guarantee the chosen victors will volunteer. You can’t force someone to volunteer. That's not a volunteer.”
“They will volunteer. There will be grave consequences otherwise.” The statement from Brutus’ mentor is directly aimed at Cato and Clove, the decision all but understood. It would be them.
Pieces of paper are being distributed amongst them, and Cato and Clove share a knowing look. This is inevitable and will be discussed among the two of them the moment they are alone.
“We’ll do ladies first.” Lyme, their unofficial official leader, collects the slips of paper and reads them aloud. “Clove. Clove. Clove. Justice. Justice. Clove. Lyme. Justice. Clove. Clove.” She swallows and nods towards the youngest woman in the room, barely more than a girl. “Clove. Congratulations.”
She’s silent, flipping the market between her fingers like a knife, staring at the oak of the table. Her eyes are glazed over, jaw locked. She is numb, completely and totally numb, but she will not give them the satisfaction of seeing her falter. Of seeing her bend.
“The men.” Lyme flicks through the papers efficiently, lips pursed. “Cato. Cato. Cato. Cato. Cato. Cato. Six. A Majority. Congratulations” The other four are for the man who trained Brutus.
It is not hard to decipher exactly who voted against sending Cato and Clove back in.
Nor, who now signed their death warrant.
“Congratulations. Our District Two volunteers for the Quarter Quell. Cato Hadley and Clove Kentwell. We will clear out the training center, send the children home for the rest of the year, so the two of you may use it. Brutus..Enobaria. You will continue your roles as their mentors seeing as you were so successful the first time.” Lyme sighs, folding the papers back up and placing them in piles according to the vote. “What an honor.”
Cato doesn’t even care to look and offer a refute before he is pushing himself to stand. In doing so he flips the table in front of him, earning an alarmed jump from the other victors save for Enobaria and Brutus who expect nothing less. He is joined by the two of them, who also intend to leave in a rage before their internal thoughts become external violence beyond their repair.
He grabs Clove’s hand and tugs her to a standing position, tugging her towards the door.
“Fuck all of you.” Clove hisses, gladly pushing herself to her feet before following Cato out the door.
So much for victors standing with other victors.
They wonder, silently but in unison, if the other young victors– their friends, likely soon to be competition– would have so easily and willingly thrown them to the wolves.
-
Let it be said that despite the rage they feel at going back, they are nothing but dedicated to their craft.
An entire academy to themselves would have been an absolute dream back as teenagers, with tireless taunting and tearing into each other before laying each other out right in the middle of the training room floor.
Now of course, they had a home together to return to after long days of training rather than sneaking in and out of each other's dorm rooms. Some things change, but some never do, and the way they are firmly attached at the hip of the other has been the way it is for over a decade.
The reality of the entire situation is one they repress.
It’s a conversation for later, not as they actively train for their grand return to the games, this time as the partners they were always supposed to be.
Funny, ten years ago Clove and Cato would have given anything to go into the games together. Today, it’s a nightmare they do not allow themselves to dwell on too long.
They are still as dynamic as they ever were. She never misses, target after target hit straight through the heart. He wields a sword like an extension of his arm, showing no mercy to any of the training aids much in the way he never did to his competitors.
And still, they are an extension of each other. He can still anticipate her next move before she can, ducking just in time before a knife clips his temple. She can still remember the exact way his shoulder twinges before he lunges for her.
When Enobaria trains Clove how to disarm someone with an axe, Clove does not think too hard about the only option of a district seven female, or how that girl was at her undesired birthday party.
Brutus teaches Cato how to snap a trident over his knee, and they do not think too long about the only options from district four being Finnick, Annie, and some elderly woman for Finnick once spoke so fondly of.  
Clove is ready for the battle of precision and accuracy against the girl from twelve and her arrows. Two girls with deadly aim from a distance who would have to take out the other to have any semblance of a chance of coming home. Enobaria had mentioned in passing that the expectation was for it to come down to the two of them. Clove isn’t sure who will come out on top of that battle of wills.
At the end of the day, they cannot blame the other victors for choosing them. It’s self-preservation, which the Victors of Two had superior instincts in.
That does not make it any easier.
Every day is a painful monotony that is blended with blissful routine.
They wake up, tangled in a mess of sheets and skin.
Clove makes breakfast, with flavors and spices and everything training food should not have according to the academy.
They train, they train hard, miserable hours until their bodies ache. They train until she needs to be half-carried home from the exhaustion in her legs They train until he needs to shower for forty minutes to work out then tension in his back. They train until their teenage selves would be scared of them.
They train for twelve hours and then they walk home.
Clove refuses to regress to dinners of plain rice and perfectly measured proteins. Cato takes his forty minute showers and she enjoys making food that tastes good. Every night is a combination of favorites of his or hers or theirs. Life, their lives at least, are far too short to give up the simple treasures they have come to love.
Despite the exhaustion they barely sleep. They spend their nights alone together, nothing but skin between them until the sun comes up.
Sure, they need rest to recover, but once more, life for them is shaping up to be so terribly short.
They could sleep when they were dead, which is sooner than they want it to be.
Wake up. Train. Each other. Repeat.  
Such is their lives for almost three entire months. Just them and the academy, where one last time they revisit the place they spent the last ten years of their lives.
Sometimes they had fans, kids who broke protocol for a chance to see the most famous victors of District Two.
“I thought they sent the kids home.”  Cato whispers, wiping the sweat from his face with his shirt he had discarded on the ground earlier when the intensity of Enobaria’s training against him amped up. He throws the shirt back down, walking towards Clove with open hands and a bare chest. “I think we have a fan club.”
“Of course we do.” Clove teases, glancing at the corner of the room where preteens had begun to sneak in and huddle around the entrance. “Can you blame them? We’re the best this district’s ever seen” Clove grabs him by the throat, swinging around to wrap her legs around his hips as she climbs on to his back. “Give them the show they came for.”
Cato flips her off, landing her firmly on her back on the ground, watching as she reaches for the knife on her thigh.
It reminded them of a simpler-- dare to say happier—time. Of being kids, whos only competition was each other. Or even when, in the wake of his games, Cato recommitted to the center, and in turn, maximizing his girlfriend’s training.
Or maybe running her into the ground.
“Cato, let me go.” Clove kicked her feet into his chest, a futile effort to get him to release his iron clad grip on her throat. “Seriously. Let. Go.”
“Noone’s letting you go in the arena.” Cato raises the hand around her throat, dangling her by the beck off the cushioned floor. “You’re little, Clove, they’ll get you like this, and if they do, you’re dead. Work harder.” He is careful not to actually harm her, not now, though as they progressed, he would have no choice but to get more aggressive and intentional with their training. “Come on Clove, fight back.”
Clove is squirming, desperately trying to pry his hands off her throat with both of her own, trying to pull back on each finger. “Cato-” This time it’s a choked gasp as he presses the space between his thumb and index finger into the front of her neck, cutting off the air to her lungs.
“Cato, STOP.” Enobaria – the only other person in the training center this late, equally as dedicated to Clove’s success as he is– goes to shove him off. “If you fucking choke her to death in here she’ll never see the arena, let her go. Now.”
“She’ll be fine if she just pushes harder. Come on. Kick me off, use your legs. Work for it, Clove.” He’s arm’s length away, close enough that with full use of her legs she could work her way out, but not close enough to give her any advantage of her hands clawing at his face. “Do you want to die like this? A foot off the ground and useless? Fight me Clove, come on.”
Enobaria goes to step in, to peel Cato away, but she is stopped when Cato himself holds her out with his other arm. “We aren’t going to be there to help her. She needs to work for it.”
“What the fuck is wrong with you, Cato. Is this some fucked up excuse to get all domestic violence on her? You’re crossing a line, this isn’t helping–”
“I know what that arena is like. We didn’t come this fucking far for you to go in and die, Clove.”
Clove finally plants her foot in the center of his chest and digs in, pushing him back enough that he at the very least is satisfied and loosens the hand on her throat. She crumbles to the ground, coughing violently as she chokes desperately for the air to reenter her lungs.  Clove’s hand comes to her own throat, curling her knees to her chest as she leans into the wall.
“She’s perfectly well trained. Don’t take out your insecurities on her.” Enobaria kneels beside her girl, using her hand to tilt Clove's face. She takes in the paleness of her skin from the restricted blood flow, Clove leaving out shaking gasps as she reorients herself. There is a redness already filling in the skin on her neck, and Enobaria will not be surprised if she has a handprint shaped bruise along her airways tomorrow.  
“We’re done for the day. Go get some rest, Clove. We’ll see you tomorrow.” She grabs Cato by the shoulder and pulls him back. “Get the fuck out of here. You went too far.”
“The games are coming fast, Enobaria.” He tries to defend himself, tugging his arm from Enobaria’s grasp. “We don’t have time to mess around.”
“There's a fine FINE line you are crossing, Cato. Go home.”
Enobaria leaves them alone in the center, then, Clove still steadying her breath and her mind after the mild asphyxiation she nearly suffered.
He crouches in front of her, offering a hand to her. “I know, it’s a lot. I can’t lose you in those games, Clove. I’d rather push you now, so I know you’ll come home.”
Clove curls away from him, laying her head against the wall. “I’ve been training longer than you did, Cato. I know what I'm doing.”
“I know. But Clove if something happened to you–”
“NOTHING is happening to me except winning.” Comes out in a rasping voice, Clove finally having steadied her breathing enough to argue. “I can handle myself.”
He won’t say sorry because he is not. He can make it up to her once she wins, once all this training was worth it and they are safe and together for the rest of their lives. Instead, he once again offers his hand to her. “Come on. Let's go home. “
“Fuck you.” Clove smacks his hand away, hiding her face in the space she’s made between her bent knees and her body. “Go away.”
“Babe don’t be like that. I’m just trying to help–”
“Leave me alone”
“I don’t want to watch you die. You can hate me now, but I’d rather you hate me and be alive.”
“Oh I hate you alright.” Clove coughs sighing as she relaxes against the wall. “I’m serious. Leave.”
“Baby. Just come home. I’ve got that bath stuff you like..” Cato rubs his hand on her knee comfortingly, testing the water of physical contact after the admittedly intense training only minutes ago. “I leave for my victory tour in a few days, I won’t see you for weeks. You’ll miss me.”
“Good, I don’t want to see you.”
“You don’t mean that, come on, don’t be like this.” Cato goes to wrap his arm under her knees. “I’ll even carry you home.”
“Get away from me.” Clove nudges his hands off her forcefully, kicking his hand away as hard as she can manage. “I’m staying in my room tonight.”
“In that shitty dorm bed? Why would you stay there when we have a bed back home. Seriously,  I’ll carry you. I’ll make up for it, I promise.”
“YOU have a bed in your house. Your house for victors. Which I am not, as you so kindly love to remind me. I’m still at tribute, remember?”  Clove raises to her feet, rubbing absently at the swelling she feels deep in the tissue of her neck.
“Fine. Be a bitch, Clove. I’ll stop trying to help you.” Cato growls, throwing his hands up in defeat. “Enjoy your dorm bed and your shitty food and your mediocre training partner.” This was new for him. No matter how far he usually pushed, she could take it. She fought back. She NEVER refused to come home.
Maybe he actually went too far, he considers only for a moment.
Clove turns away, planning to storm off and out of the room in the way most of their arguments resolve. She turns too fast and the world spins for her, and she steadies herself on the wall. She slaps away the hand of his that reaches to grab her hip, reaching to steady her. “Enjoy your tour, go choke some bitch from one since that’s what you’re into these days.”
“Remember how crazy you went before my games? I thought you were trying to actually be the one to kill me.” Clove wipes the blade of the knife on her thigh, clearing it of ballistics gel from within her favorite mannequin she had just pulled it out of (the one that felt like real flesh, of course it was her favorite, she had explained when they were thirteen).
“And yet you still came home with me almost every night anyway.” Cato pinches her hip, wrapping his arm around her waist, before leaning in and whispering against her ear. “Maybe you liked how it felt a little too much.”
“Did you consider it was because you had a nicer shower?” Clove taunts, twisting out of his grasp and pushing him against the wall by his shoulder. Clove takes a moment to appreciate how her hand plants against the dense muscle of his chest. Sure, it had only been a few years, but somehow even in the short time from seventeen to twenty he had just gotten bigger. “What do you say? We give them one last lesson?” She flashes him a wicked raise of her eyebrow and a snarky smile, nodding her head towards the herd of adolescents by the door.
“I guess we would have been their trainers. Maybe they deserve to see how it’s done.” Cato nods his head in the general direction of the huddled children. “Are any of you going to come watch or are you just going to cower in the corner?”
The kids do in fact shuffle over, about ten of them, sitting in a semi-circle in front of Cato and Clove. In another world they would have trained these kids, picked the best from their ranks, and sent them into the games. In another world they would have mentored some of them in the games and watched them come home as victors in their own right.
The kids can’t be much older than eleven or twelve, barely eligible for the reaping themselves. Clove remembers that age, how by that point Cato had distinctly been assigned as her partner for the rest of their time in training until one would die in the games at the hands of the other.
Maybe he had unintentionally also been assigned as her partner in all meanings of the world, in all facets for the rest of their lives.
“Have any of you been assigned to each other yet?” Clove waves a thin knife in their general direction, taking note how some groups of kids sat in almost pre-made pairs.
A little girl nods at her, with wide eyes and a childish gap between her teeth. She grabs the hand of the boy next to her and raises it above her head. “This one’s mine.”
Cato smiles to himself, at the natural possessiveness of the kid over her anticipatory partner. Clove had been like that, too.
“Alright. You two get up then.” Clove instructs, waving them forward. The boy walks towards Cato, and the girl to her.
She kneels behind the girl, hands square on her shoulders. It gives her the briefest sense of déjà vu. The little girl and the boy already a head taller.
“Rule number one.” Clove tells her facing her squarely against the boy her age. “Size doesn’t matter.”
“Actual rule number one.” Cato interrupts, bringing the lanky male child directly infront of him. “If you’ve got an advantage, use it.”
Just for a moment they get to pretend that they are living the future they imagined back when they were the same age as these very kids.
-
It is the last night in their home, probably forever, that they finally address their lives crumbling around them.
It’s sometime after midnight as they lay side by side on the floor of the spare bedroom next to theirs. They had gone room to room, sitting in silence as they soaked in the last night in the house, they had made their home so easily.
Years ago, now, she had laid in this very room imagining painting the ceiling and making the room their little training studio.
Now, she just wished she had enough time to store sweaters in it.
“So this is it.” Clove whispers, threading her fingers through his before bringing their linked hands to her lips. “Ten years to come to this.”
“All I ever wanted was to go in to the games.” Cato recalls, staring at the ceiling with nothing but numbness in his tone. “And now— I don’t want to go back, in, Clove.”
In the deepest corners of their home, at the latest points of the night, the nightmares had begun.
Cato, who had never even been at risk of losing, would sit on the edge of the bed awake and sweating and refusing to elaborate.
Clove, who would wake up gasping for air, hand at her throat hoping he does not hear.
Cato, who squints a little too long at the sun on those hot days and feels his skin ache when the heat settles in too long like it had back in that arena.
Clove, who cannot get out of bed during the first winter storm, because just like that she is aching deep in her bones, the feeling of metal slipping between frozen fingers all too engrained into her brain.
No one ever cared to warn them that the games will not leave them unscathed even when they come out alive. Even as careers, apparently you don’t come out without the games taking part of you, too.
“I don’t want to go back, either…what if we just refuse.” Clove murmurs, turning her head to face him. “What if tomorrow we just don’t volunteer.”
Cato squeezes her hand but says nothing. They’ve considered it, both individually and together. They know, though, that it’s not as easy as that.
Rebellious has never been the word to describe them, except perhaps when it came to being together.
“I can’t kill you.” Clove admits, voice soft and tired. Tired of training, tired of the endless games the world has played with them.
For all they talked about being the one to kill the other, suddenly that feels impossible. It feels like stabbing a knife through their own hearts, like leaving the most vital organ in their bodies behind in the arena.
Killing the other now feels unthinkable. And oh, how their sixteen year old selves would be furious at them because of that.
And yet…
She does not feel like the sixteen-year-old girl who wanted to go to the games more than anything. The girl who just wanted blood on her hands and a crown on her head.
He does not feel like the same boy whose only goal was brutal, bloody killing for the title before his name.
Maybe they are not those people anymore, or maybe they just grew up. Maybe they found something other than the games and victory worth living for.
“I won’t kill you.” Cato agrees, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and pulling her in close. “There’s no way.’
“What happens if it comes down to the two of us.” Clove lays her head on his shoulder, curling up and tossing her leg over his, intertwining their limbs. “Are we going to pull what they did? Just refused to kill each other and threaten to kill ourselves instead?”
“That is exactly what we’re going to do.” Cato kisses her temple, giving a firm shake of his head. “If it comes down to us…they can kill us themselves. We’re not doing it. It’s both of us or neither of us.”
“Together or neither.” Clove whispers, desperately trying to quell back the emotions that she feels rushing forward. “I’m not coming back without you.”
“What’s the point.” Cato agrees. Yes, he has a sister and parents, but what truly was the point. Cato without Clove may be a body without a head. Unnatural. Dead. What did they have back here, after that?
“Together.” She promises out loud, to which one of them is unclear. “Together.”
They lie there, silent, for what feels like hours.
They think of the future, that is gone before it could start.
They say goodbye to the children who will never be born. The blonde boy and his freckled little sister who they would have loved more than life itself.
They say goodbye to the empty home without the dog he so deeply wanted.  
They say goodbye to every part of their lives, except each other. Never each other.
They accept that it is either all or none. Together or neither.
There is no future here, not one they want, if they come back alone.
For all their lives they had planned to go into the games together. Side by side. The greatest team two would ever know, go down fighting against each other, and show respect in the way they killed the other.
Somehow nothing seems less appealing than coming home to two alone. Except maybe being the one to take the other out.
“We’re still partners, right?” Cato asks, voice softer than she may have ever heard it before.
“In every single way that matters.”
If either of them cry, well, that is a secret that will die between them.
-
The next morning is their last attempt at celebrating their lives.
Clove changes the sheets on the bed, with the intention that when they come home, they will want a clean bed to crawl into together. Call it delusion, call it manifestation. Call it hope.
Cato leaves his laundry on the bathroom floor. God forbid if they didn’t come home...there will signs of their life together throughout this house, he insists on it.
Signs of life-- In the laundry on the bathroom floor. In the half-used jar of honey in the kitchen cabinet to the left above the sink. In their names forever carved into the bed post.
When someone takes this home after them, they will be inextricable from the four walls.
It will forever be their home, even if they lived inside just for a short time.
Enobaria and Brutus come for breakfast. Clove does not complain this one time, as she instinctively adds a handful of mini chocolate chips to Brutus’.
Enobaria doesn’t question when Clove leans in and whispers a thank you, so quiet she almost misses it, when she hands her a plate of her favorite breakfast foods.
This is not the time for their goodbye. Not yet.
His parents come by, of course, bringing his sister. It is best to have goodbyes now. They are officially Careers the minute that reaping starts. The softness and gentle words of love for his family are behind closed doors.
Cato is being held by his mother, who over and over tells him how proud they are of him. “We love you so much.” She promises her son, who is hunched over, shoulders shaking, with his face hidden in her blonde hair. “We are so so so proud of you, my love.”
Clove feels a tightness in her throat, at the way her heart yearns for such confessions. She has no mother to promise eternal pride or love, nor a father who wordlessly hugs the way Cato’s currently is doing, holding his only son close for what will likely be the last time.
“Don’t send her to training.” Clove hears him plead, and the ‘her’ in question could only be the five year old who is currently sitting in her lap. “Let someone else volunteer. You’ll have lost enough.” It’s a plea, nearly begging, that his parents will not willingly lose their last child. Please save his sister, the child they both have done so much to protect.
“Clove?” The little girl leans back in her arms, looking up to her with innocent blue eyes full of tears. Cora has always been such an empathetic thing, so intune with the people who love her. This sweet child, who would never have the killer instincts to win the game if god forbid she is sent.  “Why is everybody so sad?”
Clove forces a smile, blinking back the tears that started threatening to well in the front of her green eyes. “Cato and I have to go away for a little while, that’s all. We don’t know when we’ll be back.”
“But you’ll come home, right? One day?” Cora Hadley leans against her, head on her shoulder, looking at her as if she hangs the sun in the sky herself.
“…I hope so, kiddo.” Clove brings her hand up to stroke at the blonde curls of her baby sister-in-law, and she remembers for a moment that no one even knows that little fact. Yet another secret will die with them.
“Promise?” Cora sniffles, and Clove feels the warmth of her tears dropping onto her skin.
“…yeah Cora, I promise.” It was a lie, and she would likely never hold this girl again, but a little white lie never hurt anyone. Why break her heart now, when with the right amount of time she may not remember them at all.  
“You can’t break a promise.” Cora reminds her, curling up in her arms like she had when she was just a toddler, arms wrapped tightly around her neck.
Clove leans her neck back to stop the tears that so badly want to flow, blinking aggressively. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Do not let this girl’s last memory be of her crying, and not the fierce competitor she is.
She sighs deeply, gently tapping Cora’s shoulder to pull her attention., “I have something for you.”
“Like a present?”
“Yeah…kind of like a present.” Clove leans back, snaking her hands around her neck. She unlatches the dainty silver chain, holding it out for Cora to inspect. The silver C that sits on the end has been through more than its fair share of games, across multiple chains and bodies. It’s time that cycle ends.
The little girl gasps, excitedly wrapping her little hands around the charm at the end. “It’s a C! For Cora?”
“Cora. Clove. Cato.” Clove explains, offering to take it and secure it around the little girl’s neck. “This was my mom’s. Then she went away, and I had to keep it safe. And now I’m going away…and I need you to keep it safe for me, okay?”
“I promise!” She agrees, nodding with a brilliant, bright smile on her face. Cora touches the script letter, but then launches her arms back around Clove’s neck. “..I’m gonna miss you.”
“…I’m going to miss you too. So much.”
Clove wonders, as she holds on to this little girl, how her mother ever let her go.
Cato joins her on the couch then, eyes red, but no tears streaking down his face. He holds out his hands and she shifts his baby sister to his arms.
“We love you.” She hears him whisper to her, holding her little head against his shoulder. Cato looks up at his parents, and she sees him hesitate, going to say something then biting back his tongue. She wonders if he was going to tell them what she thinks he was, but she will never know now as he changes his topic.
“Don’t…Please don’t let her forget about us.”
-
They are in Careers’ mindset the moment they walk into the town square for the reaping. This is the footage the other tributes their friends would see. They must be on their A game. They must be intimidating. Everybody knows, the games really start now.  
They wear head to toe black, the days of navy-blue suits and white lace dresses of their childhood reapings long behind them. No longer are they the volunteers with stars in their eyes. They’re experienced killers, now, with a lot more to lose.
They are going into this the stone-faced brutal killers that they are, murder behind their eyes and hatred in what is left of their hearts.
The surviving victors are lined up on that stage before all of their home district, and the ceremonial card is read aloud to the district. While the others beside them look fierce, none look more frightening than the cold, hardened looks of Cato and Clove.
In the end, Cato does not get to volunteer. He is oh-so-conveniently reaped, the name Cato Hadley broadcast for all the district to hear. If Clove didn’t know better, she would swear that there is annoyance in his face, that his moment to shine was taken away from him.
Despite not necessarily smiling, there is the slightest hint of a cocky smirk on his face.
They have a reputation to uphold, of course.
For a moment, Clove debates on risking it. She considers letting one of those bitchy women take her place, or rather, she debates not taking theirs. Wouldn’t that be poetic justice, refusing to volunteer, to let one of the women who voted to send her to her death go to their own. Fair is Fair.
But then the name pulled is the woman who raised her, and Clove cannot get the words out of her mouth fast enough.  
Cato and Clove join hands at the front of the stage, and when their hands are raised above their head for all of District Two, they do not smile.
They are hard. They are cold. They are killers.
When they are ushered directly to the train, without the traditional time for goodbyes, they realize they are not the only ones no longer here to play games.
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pendinganchor · 2 years
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another idea dump because why the hell not, yk
this is entirely @ariesbilly’s fault, i saw their post and couldn’t stop thinking about this
(once again i’m not figuring out the canon timeline and what has/hasn’t happened. i’ll do that if i ever actually write this — also i’ve never run away from home so idk how accurate this is but you know what it’s fandom so sue me)
- billy graduates high school with a small sum of money he had managed to keep from his father (doing odd jobs for people and picking up extra shifts his father wouldn’t know about when taking his money for “being expensive to raise”)
- he leaves in the middle of the night with only his clothes and a few things he couldn’t bear to part with. he had stood in max’s doorway for five minutes trying to decide if he wanted to say goodbye. ultimately, he couldn’t do it
- he survives by staying at cheap, sketchy motels and doing odd jobs for people he meets
- he sells his car then gets a new one about a month into his journey so his father can’t use it to track him. he wasn’t sure if he was but he didn’t want to chance it
- his destination? california (he remembers his mother telling him she would never be able to leave that state, he was holding onto hope that was still true)
- it takes him six months to get there
- he finds the cheapest apartment he can and instantly starts looking for stable work
- it’s a few more months before he gets the chance to ask around about his mother
- he doesn’t know how to feel about how easy it is to get information to find her. she had remarried. had kids from her new husband’s previous marriage and a few they had together
- everyone he talked to about her only had good things to say. if asked he said he was the kid of an old family friend
- he had found her. found out where she lived. where she worked. where her husband worked even. but for some reason he can’t get himself to go to any of those places to talk to her. to confront her
- eventually she comes to his place of work, wanting to know who this kid asking about her is. she recognizes him instantly and billy once again doesn’t know how to feel about that
- he takes his lunch break then they go to a diner a few blocks away
(my phone crashed while i was writing this so excuse me if the dialogue isn’t that good — it never is my second time writing it)
- it’s silent between them until after the waitress brings their drinks then takes their food orders
- billy looks up at his mother, a million questions running through his mind. he isn’t even able to pick one to ask before she is speaking, “billy, you have to stop this.”
- it takes him a good ten seconds to form the words, “stop what?”
- “stop asking questions about me. stop trying to come back into my life.”
- he slams a fist onto the table, "i am your son! and you're trying to push me away? again!"
- "push you away?"
- "you left me. abandoned me with that abusive excuse of a father. why? to start a new family? one that isn't broken?" his mother stayed quiet. "did you even try to see me after i begged you to come back?"
- “by the time i did, your father said you didn’t want to see me.”
- “and you believed that?”
- “billy, please. people are staring.”
- “i don’t fucking care! how could you say that to me? how could you leave me there? and now, how can you just sit there and reject me?” his last question was quieter than the rest. his gaze fell down to the table, he couldn’t look at her any longer
- “i’m sorry but i moved on years ago and you should do the same. we’re better off apart.”
- billy didn’t even know how to comprehend her words. he had dreamed about this day since she left. them reuniting and fixing their relationship. it would take time but never once did he think she would kick him out of her life for good. he slowly looked back up to her. he could see it in her eyes that she didn’t want to see him
- “fine.” he gets up, blazing past the waitress coming back with their food. his mother doesn’t even try to stop him, doesn’t even call out his name
- he doesn’t make it back to work that day
- he does make it home, despite the tears streaming down his face. he doesn’t fully remember the drive or even getting up to his apartment. but there he is, standing in the middle of the tiny living room with fucking tears streaming down his face
- why didn’t either of his parents love him? why was it such a crazy thing to want from the people who brought you into the world?
- he feels so numb
- and a few days later he would decide to move on like she told him to. he would accept the closure and work on starting a new chapter of his own
- but for now he was standing in that room, clutching the phone because all he wanted to do was call her but he couldn’t risk him answering the the phone. and would she even want to hear from him?
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lycanlovingvampyre · 1 year
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MAG 148 Relisten
Activity on my first listen: mowing the lawn.
ELIAS: (mumbling) "Here we go" (normal) Good evening, Detective." [BASIRA IMMEDIATELY ASSAULTS HIM.] ELIAS: "Ow!" That whispered "Here we go"...(btw in neither the fan transcript nor the official one) Was it just "ah yes, Basira is back" or was it "ok, Basira is fuming and I know what she wants to do, let's get this over with...". He says it later, Basira is becoming predictable. Also very satisfying sound, 10/10, only MAG 200 is even better.
ELIAS: "– I’ve – I’ve always thought that a man’s eating habits were his own private business –" [BASIRA STEPS CLOSER] BASIRA: "Mm-hm." ELIAS: (strained like he is being choked) "– but… I can see how maybe I should have mentioned it." [ELIAS CATCHES HIS BREATH] Holy shit, I either can't remember Basira choking him or I never caught it before. Fan transcript doesn’t mention any sounds in this (I added them here), official transcript only describes Elias answer as "conciliatory".
ELIAS: "Look, look – I’ve been doing this a long time now, and if there’s one thing I’ve learned about the Web, it’s that it plays its own game. All you can really do is hope it doesn’t get in the way of whatever your plan is. Because the Spider usually wins." We know that Elias finally saw his chance when Jon came to him already marked by the Web. And yeah, the Spider does win.
BASIRA: "You always call me “Detective.” Is that supposed to mean something?" ELIAS: "Honestly, I just like the way it sounds." In 159 episodes this is probably the only time he's clear about something and honest xD
JON: "I can’t believe you’ve been seeing him all this time." BASIRA: "Oh, yeah. That’s the terrible secret sabotaging the trust between us." Yeah, compared to others things, this does seem quite as big of a deal. Still, I think it's something that would have been worth mentioning. Since of a lot of relevant things happened because of this, that seemed like a dead end to them. That's suspicion. I saw an old post from 2019 some time ago, where someone said something like "The way the Dark ritual lead nowhere Jon's gonna kick off the Watcher's Crown by accident". Oops...
BASIRA: "Yeah. John, We’ve been over this. the key is to not force people to feed you their trauma. You know – just don’t do it?" Oh yeah, Nicotine is bad for you health? Just stop smoking. Easy. You're depressed? Just be more positive. Wow! /sarcasm
JON: "It’s not that simple." BASIRA: "No. It is. Or I put you down." Holy... Threatening to kill him... Wow. After she has watched Daisy for years and said nothing. She’s kind of extra aggressive on this day, first Elias, now this... Frustration?
BASIRA: "Daisy’s been managing." JON: "Daisy is… yeah. She’s managing." Daisy is fucking starving. Even if she hasn’t crossed into full Avatarhood (I think that happens after MAG 158...), Jon also was already dependent on statements in S3...
JON: "I have been meaning to ask: the tape, the one of the uh… my victim. You said Martin gave it to you." BASIRA: "Yeah." JON: "How was he? How did he look – was he – uh –" BASIRA: [interrupting; sounding slightly less harsh] "I don’t know. I didn’t see him. He just left it on my desk with a note." JON: "Oh. Right." BASIRA: "Yeah." JON: "Can I ask what it said?" BASIRA: "Um, yeah. It said, uh. “Talk to him”" JON: [harsh breathing/sobbing sounds] T_________T  It’s been a while since we had a heartwrecking scene like this...
I'll be honest, I have no memory of this statement...
There is so much more rambling about their general situation and less things actually happening, I'm already losing track again...
"So he found the manual. More of a pamphlet, really. Can’t have been more than ten pages of A5 in the whole thing, yellowed and water-damaged. Well-used, though. Someone had even put their name in the front, like they were afraid people were gonna steal a manky instruction book." Oh hold on, is that a Leitner?
Sounds like this Sampson really got into I'm On Observation Duty XD
"He kept saying, 'what do we do with his eyes?'" So the cameras?
"'He won’t stop,' he said. 'We can’t get rid of his face.'" On the CRT screen, Sampson wouldn't stop looking at them I guess.
Aw man, that post statement scene. It seems like it did something at least cause he says he's (feeling) better. But it’s not as nutritious as a new statement. And he’s needing more and more of the old statements. That’s also a effect of (some?) addicting substances. Getting accustomed to smaller doses and needing more to get the same effect as before. This is the only thing, which makes it seem like an addiction and not a need to survive. Though there are some indications that Avatars do need to cause fear to survive. “Feed your god, or it will feed on you” (MAG 89),  “Hopefully, he’ll fade away or burn out as they tend to when robbed of their purpose” (MAG 130),  “John Amherst was encased in concrete, and shrivelled away to nothing after just a few years” (MAG 184). Accepting less and less of old statements is probably just an effect of the Eye to bring him to get new experiences. And since there are some indications that also written statements given to the Archivist can cause those dreams (Dekker MAG 113, Salesa MAG 115) it will become more and more difficult to survive without harming others.
@a-mag-a-day
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piedpiperslists · 1 year
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Hi, how are you? 😊 Can I request some long tae/jk fic recs? Series or os, doesn't matter.
Hi. January was really bad for me and I've been super busy with work since February. I'm also going on a trip, so I won't have access to my computer until next week. But I hope you're doing well especially with the news we've recently gotten, or at least better than I am 🥲
I won't be putting all the long one shot/series I've read cos that'd be too many and I also don't have a lot of time before I need to leave for my flight. I'll just include below some personal favorite long one shots (with wc>10k) and series for both Jungkook and Taehyung.
* s - contains smut
J U N G K O O K
Baby Don’t Go (I’m Bad at Being Alone) by whoreternal - one shot (s) / wc~25k / friends to lovers
Blink And You’ll Miss It by satnin-darling - one shot (s) / wc~13.3k / lawyer!Jungkook, street racer!reader Summary: Jungkook is just trying to do his job by bailing you out (on top of being a busy attorney in the city) but you seem to be hell-bent on making that ten-times harder for him. Street racers aren’t known to be slow, in fact, you have the reputation of ‘blink and you’ll miss her,’ so what’s the deal?
Chasing Butterflies by ddaenggtan - one shot (s) / wc~12.8k / otaku!Jungkook, jock!reader, college au Summary: You never meant to be a jock in school. The volleyball team had just needed people and you were there and then you had a knack for it. You just happened to be good at it and went with it. Similar to how you saw Jeon Jungkook in your friend’s orientation group and thought he was absolutely radiant and just went with it. For two years. You’ve spent the entire time pining from afar, mostly because you always seem to make a fool of yourself when he’s around, but also because Jungkook is part of that exclusive crowd, the ones that you never can seem to penetrate: the weebs. That is, until your friends get sick of your hopeless pining and decide to do something about it.
Feels Like Summer by badbhye - one shot (s) / wc~16.6k / brother's best friend, neighbors au Summary: You only have one question on your mind this summer: when did Jeon Jungkook get abs?
Fifth Wish by jiminrings - one shot / wc~18k / rich kid!Jungkook, bodyguard!reader, fake dating Summary: Jeon Jungkook, world-class socialite and nepotism baby, should be out every night to celebrate while he’s at his prime. Why should he fake-date his bodyguard instead? Alternatively, Jungkook regularly throws coins to wishing wells with only one desire in mind — to get rid of you.
Gotcha by whatifyoulivelikethat - one shot (s) / wc~11k / childhood friends to lovers, college au Summary: The color blue. Two white hairpins. “Hey, Jungkook.” A laugh with shaking shoulders that Jeon Jungkook thought he would hear and see forever. Hey, Jungkook. But then those words became a memory, until she was standing in front of him again, sporting the title of “Virgin Killer” and Min Yoongi by her side. Was this his second chance or just another memory?
Habits of a Broken Heart by softykooky - one shot / wc~26.3k / art student!Jungkook, English student!reader, subtle enemies to lovers, soulmates au Summary: Jungkook and you are soulmates. So says the matching crescent moons on both your wrists. However, things are never as easy as they seem, and you are quick to learn that falling in love with someone who does not believe in love is a one-way ticket to heartbreak. Alternatively, “you still are, you know. Worth it.” You release a shaky breath. “but I was stupid to think that I am too.”
Late Fee by 1kook - one shot (s) / wc~10.3k / fuckboy!Jungkook, college au Summary: “Captain Underpants isn’t glorified by all the tryhards, so when I pick those books, you’re unknowingly more interested in me.”
Second Chances by parkhabits - one shot (s) / wc~14.4k / exes to lovers, divorce au Summary: Work. One of the most important things to him. It kept him company at night, it was all he thought about, all he put his attention to. His work had become the mistress within your marriage. Years after you left him you’re back with only one goal in mind. Get him to sign the damn divorce papers. Yet you should’ve known that your husband wouldn’t let you go that easily.
The Boy With Galaxies in His Eyes by oddinary4bts - one shot (s) / wc~52.9k / tattoo artist!reader, FWB, idol au Summary: You had never thought the night sky could be found in someone’s eyes. That is, until you met Jeon Jungkook and his gravity pulled you in. Will he crush you with the galaxies in his eyes, or will you learn to explore his worlds and make them yours?
The Monogamy Monologues by kpopfanfictrash - one shot (s) / wc~42.7k / wedding planner!reader, strangers to lovers Summary: The year? Some point after college. The occasion? Namjoon is getting married and the Rich Man’s Crochet Club has convened once again. Somewhere between the drinks and the laughter, everyone has the same realization: Jungkook has never been in a serious relationship. In the name of all that is holy (Overwatch and booze), the club’s mission is revived. Now though, their goal is much more perilous. Now, they aim to find Jeon Jungkook a girlfriend.
Twelve Hours by whatifyoulivelikethat - two shots (s) / film director!Jungkook, burlesque dancer!reader Summary: You have twelve hours to make Jeon Jungkook fall in love with you. He's about to get married. You're the entertainment at his bachelor party - a burlesque dancer. Long ago, he used to be the class representative and you used to be the class delinquent. Nothing has changed and, yet, everything has.
Airplane, Pt. 2 by xjoonchildx - series (s) / criminal!Jungkook, agent!reader Summary: Jungkook Jeon stole six million dollars. It’s your job to bring him home. But finding him – and keeping him in one place is not that simple. Then shit gets weird.
Crimson Park by heartbeatan - series (s) / bookkeeper!reader, mafia au Summary: A thematic, mobster several-part series. * This series is complete, but the author has mentioned a sequel is in progress.
Ego by suga-kookiemonster - series (s) / fuckboy!Jungkook, college au Summary: What’s a girl to do when her sweet, innocent baby lab partner isn’t quite so sweet and innocent? Well, he’s a grown-ass man, and you’re about to learn that the hard way.
Four Seven Eight by jiminrings - series / actress!reader, established relationship Summary: You’re secure when it comes to loving Jungkook, knowing that your husband loves you beyond words. What you aren’t so secure about is his first love — someone who isn’t you. Alternatively, Jungkook’s married to you, but he still celebrates his anniversary with his ex out of sentimentality.
I Gasp Once, and in That Breath, I Accept You In [pt2] [epilogue] by inkofyoonkoo - series (s) / strangers to lovers, FWB Summary: In which Jungkook arrives to your small town to spend the holidays, and you slowly let go of all the ghosts of your past.
Liability by alexlwrites - series / best man!Jungkook, best friend!Taehyung, maid of honor!reader Summary: The one where your best friend of years and love of your life is getting married and wants you to be the maid of honor. Luckily for you, the best man is not exactly happy either.
Rattled by gukslut - series (s) / single dad!Jungkook, neighbors au
Woman on Top by heartbeatan - series (s) / actor!Jungkook, older!reader, producer!reader, FWB
T A E H Y U N G
I have this previous ask that I've answered before for long Taehyung fics. But I'll include here just a few of my favorite ones.
Always the Bridesmaid by kookingtae - one shot (s) / wc~34.1k / enemies to lovers Summary: When you first meet Kim Taehyung, you’re determined to find every reason you can to hate him—or maybe he’s just looking for ways to get on your last nerve. But when a turn of events has the two of you working the wedding of the man you’re hopelessly in love with, you’re too late to realize the real reason to hate Kim Taehyung is because of the latest column he’s secretly writing: “Always the Bridesmaid, Never the Bride”, and it’s all about you.
Dichotomy by kpopfanfictrash - one shot (s) / wc~14.5k / childhood friends to lovers, arranged marriage Summary: You hate him. He hates you. It’s a fine line though, isn’t it – between love and hate?
Farmer Boy, I Love You by strawberrynamjoon - one shot (s) / wc~35k / childhood friends to lovers, farming au Summary: Needing change in your life you decided it would be a brilliant idea to move to your uncle’s small farm, helping him and your cousin Jimin with the daily work. What you didn’t plan was to fall in love with your beautiful yet very annoying neighbour Taehyung, who seemed to make it his personal mission to tease you every chance he got. And what you expected even less was that he seemed to like you too.
Let It Snow by suga-kookiemonster - one shot (s) / wc~18.8k / FWB Summary: It all started by accident, but it continues by choice—even before you began sleeping together, things with your friend Taehyung have always been comfortable and easy. Simple, and this new arrangement between you is certainly no exception to that rule. Well…that’s definitely what you thought before a major snowstorm traps the two of you in his apartment over the holidays. Now? Now, it is quickly becoming apparent that things are a bit more complicated than you realized.
Love Me or We Both Go Down by gukyi - one shot (s) / wc~32k / enemies to lovers, arranged marriage Summary: After going through with an arranged marriage to please his parents and secure his inheritance of the family business, Kim Taehyung thinks he’s got it all figured out. He doesn’t. Apparently just being married to you isn’t enough, not when everybody and their mother can pick up on the fact that the two of you absolutely loathe each other. But Taehyung wants his inheritance one way or another, so he decides that desperate times call for desperate measures: the two of you need to fall in love, and you need to fall in love fast.
Moon Breaker by magicalsalamander - one shot (s) / wc~17k / werewolf au Summary: Tales as old as time were passed through the werekind. If a human and a kind were to be mates, the moon would take them, the misfortune, to serve the Goddess. Taehyung, a kind, had always heard of the tales told by his elders. The alpha of his kind. He didn’t expect to find his mate, one of the non-kinds. Would the moon reap her back?
No Blueberries by gyukult - one shot / wc~12.3k / college au Summary: No more!Taehyung gets his heartbroken to the point he doesn’t even love his favorite fruit, blueberries, anymore. Then he meets you, the complete opposite of the girl of his dreams, and suddenly, blueberries taste sweet again.
Rubies and Roses by min-youngis - one shot / wc~40k / strangers to lovers, fake dating Summary: Being a fake girlfriend slash fiancée slash wife for hire is a very lucrative business, and quite straightforward. But none of your previous clients have been Kim Taehyung, who wants access to his trust fund and thinks he can convince his parents that he can be responsible with it by proving that he can hold down a mature, completely normal and not-at-all fake relationship. This isn’t any job, and the boundaries between customer and something more are about to get increasingly blurry.
The Holi-Date by kpopfanfictrash - one shot (s) / wc~40.5k / fake dating, neighbors au Summary: When your ex-boyfriend becomes engaged to his new girlfriend at your annual Holiday party, you admittedly are not in the best place. Which explains why you down six shots of alcohol, enthusiastically drop it low on the dance floor and – oh, yeah – tell everyone you are also dating someone. The only problem? You are obviously not. Good thing your neighbor happens to be cute and in need of a ride to work every morning.
Upstream Colour by honeymoonjin - one shot (s) / wc~22.7k / strangers to lovers Summary: Escaping to Venice for a break from your strenuous job was meant to be simple. Go there, decompress for two weeks, and return feeling invigorated. But the soulful gondolier you meet on the docks in Saint Mark’s Square has you wanting to never leave at all.
Bed Bereft [epilogue] [drabbles] by randombtsprincessa - one shot + drabbles (s) / ft KSJ, best friend!Taehyung, polyamory au Summary: You’ve loved your college best friend for ages, too bad he’s got a boyfriend. Twisted decisions lead to revelations about sexualities, secrets, feelings and confrontations.
4:23 AM by satnin-darling - series (s) / FWB, idol au Summary: You indirectly confessed to Yoongi. Well, it was all Taehyung’s fault (you don’t know that yet). So in the midst of drowning yourself in your sorrows, Taehyung comes to visit you because inadvertently, he too has a broken heart. Then, a misunderstanding, followed by an apology. But the apology was not in the way that you think an apology should have been, and maybe, just maybe, you’d find it in yourself forgive him.
Because of You, Blue by ugh-yoongi - series (s) / exes to lovers Summary: Nearly a year out from your breakup with Taehyung, Jin begs you for help saving his failing restaurant. The two of you aren’t exactly friends, but you feel some stupid sense of obligation and, really, what’s the worst that could happen?
Destructive Interference by vyduan - series (s) / childhood friends to lovers Summary: You do not remember a time before Taehyung Kim — only the after. The afters, if you are being precise. If only the afters were not so akin to little deaths; perhaps you would not have minded so much. Alas, such knowledge is a posteriori. What is the use of regret on hardwon facts such as these? It is too late. There is no time before Taehyung Kim for you; he just is. A priori. Is there a time before your parents or your brother? They are and thus have always. There is not enough time. There is never enough time.
The President's Son by jimlingss - series / bodyguard au Summary: Kim Taehyung is the President’s son, mischievous and playful, and infamous for being a troublemaker. When everyone’s given up, they call for you to be his personal guard. There’s no other choice when your dad’s assigned you to it and surprisingly Taehyung doesn’t mind either. Maybe because you happened to grow up with that brat.
You can also check these tags for the lists I've made for one shots (Jungkook, Taehyung) and series (Jungkook, Taehyung).
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hi cas! Swiftie anon here! I’ve been kind of having a shit week, in general. A few days ago my throat started hurting, and my nose started crying, so that’s been fun, and school feels like it’s taking fucking forever every day. last night, my sister was talking, and I asked my brother to get a coaster for me, since I was holding a hot bowl, and he was standing in front of the drawer, but my sister was talking, so I wanted until she was done to ask again.
my sister is great btw. I’d never say that to her face, but she’s my younger sister, and she’s always been so…happy, and I want it to say that way, she started middle school this year, and I was scared she’d go through the same things I did, and idk that freaked me out. She’s annoying as hell, but I want her to say happy, as long as she can be, so I haven’t been like putting pressure on her, or getting as mad at her as I did when we were younger. And like we’re only a year and a half apart, but ever since I got depressed I feel a lot older, which is sad because we were so close when we were younger. People used to think we were twins, and I miss being that close to someone, trusting someone that much, whispering things under the blankets, and playing games only the two of us know.
anyway, I asked after she was done talking, which was just few seconds, and I got the coaster, and set it down, and then my mom said, you need to talk louder, you’re mumbling again. and l got probably unreasonably angry when she said that, because I’ve always been quiet, when we were younger, my sister talked for the two of us, I hate talking and I’ve never been very loud. And maybe I like being quiet, not only because it’s in my nature, but you always yelled at us for being too loud and interrupting people, and maybe I’m scared to make you angry? Maybe I remember that shit? Maybe I don’t like being noticed because you always get pissed at my older brother, and that’s the only way I ever see you talk to him?
and then that night (after dinner we all go watch tv, play games separately, go to my parents room, pray and then sleep) she got mad at us saying, we’re not a community, we’re just people living together the three (me and my siblings) of you are cocooned in your rooms all the fucking time. You’re on your fucking phones all the damn time, melting your brains, you could be doing better things with your time. And why the hell wouldn’t I want to be in my room instead of with my parents, they stress me the fuck out, and make me feel like I’ve already ruined my chances at everything, and maybe that’s why I need to escape, because they made me believe everything fucking sucked.
and I know being on your phone and sitting down for like 4-5 hour periods isn’t healthy, but that’s a habit I’ll deal with after all the other issues they’ve caused me. I had a bit of a breakdown after that, my arms got red and puffy from my nails, but I didn’t bleed this time so…is that a plus?
I got my at my sister last weekend bc she like, dropped my instrument and didn’t pick he up and I almost smacked her, and my dad saw me like, about to, but I stopped, and got so mad at me? He said, and I quote, “apologize, how would you feel if I got you and ten years later I never said sorry?” and then I was like wtf are you talking about, you hit me when I was in like preschool (10 years ago) and never apologized. I vaguely remember him hitting me, like before kindergarten, I somehow forgot that he did until that moment. I know he and my mom got into fights about it (bc calling us stupid and staying is so much better).
and then this morning we woke up late, and my dad said “you’ll end up all alone bc no one wants anyone who never shows up on time.” And my mom started fucking monologuing about how we’re “wasting our intelligence” and we should on things better, and I started fucking bawling, bc I went to preschool far from home, so when I started going to elementary, I didn’t have any friends, and I had like, a singular friend, I made and she moved at the end of first grade, and so on and so forth until 3rd grade when the pandemic happened, so like ending up alone has always been a fear of mine, and they know this, bc back when I trusted them I literally asked them why do all my friends move away? and school has fucking sucked, pe isn’t so bad, we’re fishing in a lake across the street and I caught one today and almost killed it bc it swallowed the hook, and everything else, besides like my friends has been miserable. I had a dentist appointment today (I have them all the damn time), and they numbed the right side of my face, 3 injections, they’re so sore, and I still can’t feel the lower right part of my mouth, so that’s fun. Sorry for the rant, hope you’re having a better week than me cas! Have a good day/night
Hi hon! <3
It sounds like you're dealing with a LOT of negativity right now, especially at home, and that absolutely sucks. Are there ways you can find some positivity on your own? Things that make you happy even when others are being shitty?
I'm so proud of you for dealing with life even when it's hard <3 You're doing so great, truly! <3
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