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xervoxs · 3 months

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Hotch*checking under the bed*

Hotch: see no monsters in here

Reid: and closet..

Hotch*opening the closet*: see..

Hotch: Emily?

Hotch: come out, now

Emily: i'm lesbian

Morgan*coming out of nowhere*: i knew it

Reid*screams*

Hotch: what the..

#aaron hotchner #spencer reid #emily prentiss #derek morgan #cm #criminal minds #criminal minds incorrect quotes #incorrect quotes #cm incorrect quotes #cm incorrect #thomas gibson #mathew gray gubler #mgg #paget brewster #shemar moore

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patrickispinky · 6 months

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Derek: are you the big spoon or the little spoon?

Emily: i'm the knife

Jj: *from across the room* she's the little spoon

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spencestiel-michelle · 14 days

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*the BAU team noticing Y/n and Spencer Reid*

Emily: hey- Derek. look at how close they’re standing.

Garcia: they’re practically breathing the same oxygen.

Derek scoffs: that kid’s got nerve. yesterday he literally took a whole step away from me when I stood too close to him- went on about something like germs in the air or whatever.

Garcia: yeah, well, my love, you are not Y/n.

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velvetwilde · 1 month

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What was the reason to look this damn hot?

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lilliejareau · 1 month

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yall is just me or does david rossi lowkey have the same vibe as manny from ice age?

do they look alike? is it the hair swoop? idk but it’s SOMETHING

#is it just me #david rossi #manny from ice age #criminal minds #cm #criminal minds gone wrong #funny post #incorrect criminal minds #text post #criminal minds incorrect #lillie jareau

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thedelusionalbitchgianna · 3 months

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*Spencer zoned out*

Derek: What are you thinking about?

Spencer: How long i'd survive if you suffocated me with a pillow.

Derek: What's wrong with you?

Spencer: Do you want a list?

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demonicbaby666 · 10 months

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Emily: [flips monopoly board over] Hotch: Prentiss! Emily: This is why your wife is dead Reid: Emily! Emily: This is why your girlfriend is dead Morgan: Emily: This is why you’re bald Morgan: I DIDNT SAY SHIT!

#criminal minds incorrect quotes #criminal minds incorrect #incorrect criminal minds quotes #criminal minds #Emily Prentiss #Spencer Reid #Derek Morgan #Aaron Hotchner #the bau team #cm

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criminal-mindsincorrect · 4 months

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JJ : An apple a day keeps the doctor away

Emily : Slowly bites into an apple while menacingly looking at Reid

Reid :

Reid : Emily what the fuck

#criminal minds #criminal minds incorrect #incorrect quotes #quotes #incorrect criminal minds quotes #cm incorrect quotes #spencer reid #spencer criminal minds #emily prentiss #jennifer jareau #jj criminal minds

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sarcasm-and-stiles · 2 months

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Y/N: When you said 'Magic in Bed', I wasn't expecting this...

Spencer: *pulls out card from deck* Now, was this your card?

Y/N: Holy fuck-

#fanfiction #sarcasm and stiles #x reader #spencer reid fluff #Spencer Reid #Dr Spencer Reid #Dr Spencer Reid x reader #Spencer Reid x reader #cm #criminal minds #incorrect quote generator #incorrect quotes #incorrect criminal minds quotes #fluff #humor

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bucker3911 · 6 months

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(respectfully ofc)

#i don't think you need a choking kink to want his hands around you #just saying #spencer reid #spencer reid smut #spencer reid x reader #mgg x reader #mgg smut #criminal minds #cm memes #criminal minds incorrect quotes #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x reader smut #mgg x you #mgg #spencer reid hands

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blackhillfilmss · 1 year

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Y/N: What if the person who named Walkie Talkies named everything?

Emily: Pregnancy tests are Maybe Babies

Penelope: Socks are Feetie Heaties

JJ: Forks are Stabby Grabbies

Spencer: Defibrillators are Heartie Starties

Derek: Nightmares are Dreamy Screamies

Y/N: Stamps are Lickie Stickies

Hotch: *annoyed* You’re all disappointments

#emily prentiss #penelope garcia #jennifer jareau #spencer reid #derek morgan #aaron hotchner #incorrect criminal minds quotes #cm incorrect quotes #criminal minds incorrect quotes #criminal minds #incorrect criminal minds #incorrect cm #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds x y/n #aaron hotch x reader #emily prentiss x reader #jennifer jareau x reader #spencer reid x reader #penelope garcia x reader

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xervoxs · 2 months

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spencer: oh my god

spencer: you broke emily

derek: what do we do??

aaron: *speechless*

emily: *crying*

penelope: i just let her listen to taylor swift

#criminal minds #spencer reid #aaron hotchner #emily prentiss #derek morgan #dr spencer reid #criminal minds incorrect quotes #cm incorrect quotes #cm #incorrect quotes #cm incorrect #taylor swift

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patrickispinky · 6 months

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Emily: i can't find my pen. are you sitting on it again?

Y/n: no.

Emily: stand up.

Y/n: i don't want to.

Emily: why?

Y/n: *mumbling* because i'm probably sitting on your pen 😔

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spencestiel-michelle · 4 months

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*Fire alarms go off in FBI building at 7:45 am*

Hotch: alright, that’s the annual fire drill. everybody stay calm and exit the-

*Penelope RUNS out of the room*

Hotch: GARCIA?

Penelope, running down the hall: I NEED MY PLUSHIESSSS. THEY WILL SURVIVE!!!

Hotch: it’s just a drill-

Reid, fretting: HAS EVERYBODY READ MY EMERGENCY FIRE DRILL PROCEDURES???

*Emily throws herself through the glass window*

Derek: we’re on the sixth floor, how’s she gonna…?

Hotch: will everyone please calm down, it’s ONLY a-

*Reid stops, drops, and rolls around the floor*

Derek shrugs and starts doing super-spy moves (somersaults, unnecessary turns, etc.) to maneuver around the building, evading the “fire”

Hotch: i truly don’t know why i even try…… where’s Dave?

*David Rossi has yet to step inside the building this morning with the foreknowledge of the annual fire drill*

Rossi, sipping coffee, leaning against the building: i wonder how he’s doing this year.

*JJ arrives late*

JJ: hey, what’d i miss?

Rossi: annual fire drill.

JJ: ah.

JJ: ooh.

Rossi: yeah.

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reidxtrminds · 6 months

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Rossi: Call the kids, they're not listening to me.

Hotch: I'm not their dad.

Rossi: Just do it.

Hotch to the kids, Spencer, Derek, Emily, JJ and Penelope: Okey everyone ! Line up, the car leave in 5 minutes !

The kids: *Immediately line up and follow Hotch like ducklings*

Rossi:

Hotch:

Hotch: No listen, LISTEN I'm not their-

#incorrect criminal minds quotes #criminal minds #derek morgan #emily prentiss #spencer reid #penelope garcia #jennifer jareau #ssa aaron hotchner #ssa emily prentiss #ssa derek morgan #dr. spencer reid #david rossi #aaron hotchner #aaron hotch hotchner #chaoticbau #cm incorrect quotes

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ralvezfanatic · 3 months

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Y/N, to Spencer while straddling his lap: Glasses stay on during sex.

Spencer, who was about to take his glasses off: Oh, um.. okay.

Y/N: Wait I meant that as in my glasses. I'm blind as fuck.

Spencer, slightly confused: Oh. *moves his hand to take his glasses off*

Y/N: Wait no, keep yours on too, they're super hot

Spencer, still confused and now flustered: ...

#criminal minds incorrect quotes #source: my brain #cm incorrect quotes #y/n is actually me #i cant see shit without my glasses #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x male reader #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds x male reader

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