#i can imagine Michael doing this pose exactly

[ineffablemossy]

#ineffable husbands #good omens #crowley #aziraphale #crowley x aziraphale #otter #feel the love #the books! oh no the books... #michael sheen #neil gaiman #david tennant #i can imagine Michael doing this pose exactly #please Michael make this in real life #we know youre watching #new memes #my post

[diordeer]

౨ৎ SOMEONE LIKE YOU

“i've been searchin' a long time for someone exactly like you, i’ve been travelin' all around the world waitin' for you to come through” - van morrison (smau)

contains: charlie bushnell x fem!reader, where they play in a movie adaptation of ‘better than the movies’ also pls ignore how i spelt ‘preparation’ wrong

description: i cant lie, before i saw this request i hadnt read the book but my friend had and she loved it so i was like ok lets impulse buy it… let me tell u i finished it so quick im OBSESSED

requested by: @taysbeauty

Liked by iamcharliebushnell, momonatamada and others

yn.ln in the winter in the icy outdoor pool when u jumped in first i went in too!!

tagged iamcharliebushnell

user1 THE DREAM CASTING OMG

user2 “I WANTED WES” 😖😖😖

↳ user3 she gets it

user4 only one more week until this god sent movie comes out 🫡

↳ user5 i think it should be a law to watch every romcom mentioned before watching this in the cinema

↳ yn.ln how can i make this an actual law

iamcharliebushnell im with u even if it makes me blue 🥶🥶

user7 we all know the soundtrack for this movie is gonna HIT

↳ user8 imagine if taylor swift released new years day (taylors version) for it!

↳ user9 i honestly doubt it but i WISH

momonatamada ahhh i cant wait!!

user6 me patiently waiting for the scene when wes reads over livs shoulder ☺️

↳ user11 the tension 😫

user10 i will now never watch a romcom if it doesnt have charlie and yn as the love interests

yn.ln just posted on their story

Seen by dior.n.goodjohn, sabrinacarpenter and others

Liked by yn.ln, walker.scobell and others

iamcharliebushnell how you swoon me like no other!

tagged yn.ln

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user1 can we talk ab how charlie probs took that photo of yn 🩷

user2 IS THAT MR FITZ PERVERT

↳ yn.ln no its michael

user3 them captioning their posts with lyrics from liz and wes’ playlist is KILLING ME

user4 guys i just saw the film wtf it was everything i imagined and MORE

↳ user5 any scene with yn and charlie made me physically kick my legs and giggle in the cinema

yn.ln ooomg do iiii 🤭🤭

↳ iamcharliebushnell i wouldnt say swoon

↳ yn.ln yet u did 🤨

user6 can we talk about their on AND off chemistry pls

↳ user7 THEY ARE LITERALLY IRL WES AND LIZ

dior.n.goodjohn charlie in a romcom?!

↳ iamcharliebushnell u got something against that? 😧🤨

↳ dior.n.goodjohn never!!

user8 dream man playing a dream man

walker.scobell finally he plays a good guy 🙄

↳ iamcharliebushnell i betrayed everyone ONE TIME, get over it

user9 the way better than the movies has almost every trope in the books is insane

Liked by iamcharliebushnell, kiernanshipka and others

yn.ln hold on to the memories, they will hold onto you!!!!!!

tagged iamcharliebushnell

View all comments.

iamcharliebushnell did u actually just mug me off in the first pic while u look gorgeous in the last one?! absolute bias

↳ yn.ln u look great wdym 😃 plus! i think i got a pretty good photo of u in my last post

↳ iamcharliebushnell mhmm

user1 casually flicking past may jailer?!

↳ yn.ln im posing so cool in the photo, the second charlie took the photo i SCRAMBLED to the till to buy it

↳ iamcharliebushnell can confirm!!

user2 omg their latest interview together i cant 😣🩷

↳ user3 the way charlie looks at yn!!!!!!!

↳ user5 the things i would do for a relationship like theirs

↳ user4 lets be real if anyone played a relationship like liz and wes’ in a movie… you would 100% fall in love

↳ user6 guys they havent even said anything about being together!! and even if they are let them be

↳ user5 OH MY GOD its not that big of a deal get over it user6

kiernanshipka just saw the film, you were incredible!!

↳ yn.ln OH MY GOD I LOVE YOU

taglist: @lostinhisworld @lizziesfirstwife @auttumnsayshi @silkenthusiasts @taygrls @kidkrowk @kanojous @niktwazny303 @m00ng4z3r @highfidelities

#charlie bushnell x reader #luke castellan x reader #percy jackon and the olympians #smau #social media au #aesthetic #charlie bushnell #in the know #x reader #better than the movies #wes bennett

[poindexters-labratory]

#michael afton #fnaf #artists on tumblr #ennard #sister location #my wrist is dead #fnaf hurricane au

[nobodymitskigabriel]

Braiding your hair at the sleepover, do you have any headcanons about what exactly it is that Gabriel and Loki had been getting up to between their escape and the apocalypse? Aside from vaguely fucking shit up trickster style lol

It's really impressive that you can braid hair that's as short as mine! Neat party trick 💞. Anyway I think fucking shit up trickster style composed a majority of their activities when they weren't just fucking full stop but here's some random ass headcanons that have wormed their way into my brain

Loki snatched Gabriel's blade off him almost immediately after his rescue and stabbed him with it. Thinking on his feet, Gabriel faked his death for the fist time just so he could have the chance to pop up and give Loki a surprise later.

Gabriel making an empty vessel for himself is a pretty common headcanon, but I think when he created it, it looked like his original vessel, the biblical Gabriel, and the idea to take Loki's place came later.

Gabriel shapeshifting to look like Loki started as a joke. That's a running theme in their relationship, things starting as a joke.

If you imagine that Gabriel was probably stationed on earth by Michael, then he or Raphael could conceivably come check on him especially if they think he's dilly-dallying. There were probably some close calls with Loki almost being discovered which led to Gabriel freely giving Loki sigils or spells that work against archangels.

I can't believe I saw you posting about Gabriel as Sigyn as well but literally I think that while Loki convened with other gods at this time, Gabriel posed as his wife. (Did he shapeshift or is he just a femboy?? Idk) He didn't care even slightly about the cultural prejudice against effeminacy.

Loki did not trust Gabriel at all at first and was always planning a way to get rid of him. As they got closer, Loki begrudgingly started to care about and trust him and discarded the idea. The betrayal we saw in s13 was just Loki carrying out the same plan he had stashed away for a very long time just in case.

Gabriel and Loki probably did do it a couple of times while Gabriel had shifted to look like Loki, but I think mooost of the sex they had took place with Gabriel looking like his original vessel. That's the face that Loki is attracted to. When Gabriel took Loki's place, even if Loki hadn't had to "go away" for plot reasons, that would have been an end of an era for them.

It was insanely fucking weird for Loki to have his ex show up after forever looking and acting exactly like him and I think it freaked him out. I think Gabriel always freaked him out in some way. He used to find it exciting until Gabriel became a liability.

(Also I did listen to that hozier album and it was very much full of vibes if you have other recs I'm all ears)

#ask game #lokiel #one day. i will write a fic. one day

[the-lil-exorcist]

Coffee Emergency|| Wynne & Lil

TIMING: July 18th (today), During the day LOCATION: A Latte to Love PARTIES: @the-lil-exorcist & @ohwynne SUMMARY: Lil pulls a National Treasure and needs a counter to hide behind. Luckily Wynne has seen weirder and lets her. CONTENT WARNING: Mentions of missing parents and siblings.

Lil probably shouldn’t have tried to get into the ghostbuster’s building knowing that they - well - didn't like her very much. She was still banned and would be for the rest of her mortal life - hell maybe as a spirit too. Moreover, she didn’t even like them very much.  Still, part of her wondered if they had something to do with what she was dealing with now. She couldn’t really understand why they would go after the rest of her family, seeing as they had believed her dad but she was getting desperate. People were following Jonas, and as much as he didn’t believe it she couldn’t help but connect it to the organization that hated her. 

She just wanted them back, so she had tried to get in the backway - into what seemed like a meeting suddenly surrounded by people who seemed at first surprised and then furious at her. Lil wasn’t known for her luck, and in a panic she pulled the fire alarm and ran thinking that maybe she could pretend that it wasn’t her. She knew for sure there hadn’t been any cameras, and for once Lil had dressed down, her long hair pulled back and her usual style more akin to normal street wear.  

Still, she had to get out of the area, and she was pretty sure that they were following behind her so ducking into a shop she realized she must have entered when they were closing. Still, finding a person behind the counter she started to ramble. 

“Hey - this is going to sound strange but can I hide behind your counter  for a second?” Lil said to the other, hoping for once that she could catch a break. “I’ll buy a coffee - I shit.” She said seeing Michael - a guy she was pretty sure hated her a lot passing and without thinking Lil ducked down. “Please?” Hoping that the other wasn’t a fae. 

Wynne had thought a job serving coffee would be peaceful enough. Customer-facing and stressful enough, but compared to their former life of manual labor and regular sacrificial celebrations it should not be too hard. And yet, life kept throwing curveballs. A monster, a woman wearing bones with a past that eerily aligned with their own, two public break ups in a row and sometimes they swore their boss’ favorite milk steamer moved on its own accord.

It would be easier if they could stop questioning things, but it was starting to become part of their nature to question everything they came across. This however wasn’t to say Wynne was about to fight the person who came in with a self-proclaimed strange demand. They looked at her, a bit dazed, and shrugged, as if to say this might as well happen, too.

They tipped up the flap that separated the counter from the rest of the coffeeshop. “Come on,” they said, wondering what the other might be wanting to hide from. That, at least, was something Wynne could relate to — but it wasn’t a comforting common ground to share. They gestured with a bit of a rush. “Just crouch down, or get in the back.” 

Their own eyes passed a look through the windows, wondering if any of the people posed a risk. “What’s going on?” Their voice, on that last question, was a bit higher than before.

Lil scrambled under the divider moving quick enough that stupid Michael probably couldn’t have seen her grateful that the other had done it and catching her breath for a moment. She didn’t know if the others would have thought Lil was bold enough to enter the coffee shop, but in any case exorcists weren’t exactly like hunters. For better or worse, they were a lot less of trackers and more so the let it be type. 

She used to like that when she was younger, but as she grew into her rage Lil couldn’t imagine being so passive. They really just waited until bad things happened and then did something about it instead of the other way around. 

At the question Lil looked up at the other and figured she should tell them something. Figuring that the truth was at least easier for her to remember than a lie, Lil just tried to keep the supernatural bit out of it. “They are - a part of a group that I was in that I was kicked out of. I didn’t do anything bad or anything like that. We were cool about my ban but - my sibling is missing and they were a part of the organization still and I figured that those asses might have some information about them.” Jane hadn’t been exactly kicked out of the Ghostbusters - but demonologists were rarely associated with any of them. It was one of the reasons Lil’s dad had gotten her kicked out. It might be a death sentence for an exorcist doing dangerous work - but it was expected for a demonologist. 

Leaning up a little, Lil looked out the window to see if Michael was still outside ducking down quickly when she saw a ghost talking to him. She really hoped they weren’t a snitch. “I didn’t steal anything or hurt anyone. I just wanted to see if my sibling was still in their system to see what they might have been involved in.” 

They missed the farm sometimes. They missed digging their fingers in the earth and creating hole after hole after hole to fill with seeds, to hear the birds caw and whistle, the wind on the lake in the distance, the chatter of the people around them. Life at the commune had followed a steady (albeit restrictive) beat and had certainly not had situations like these.

Wynne stared at the other, not thinking of the fact that it could be considered rude. All social conventions had been thrown out of the window, anyway. Their eyes only grew wider as the other answered, not offering some evasive answer but something that seemed honest and surprisingly detailed. Wynne had expected a convoluted lie or perhaps something about shoplifting, but instead there was a tragedy. Of course they believed it without an inkling of doubt.

With that belief came the crashing thought of their brother and how he might be holding up. Sometimes it took them by surprise, the weight of the consequences of their actions and how they didn’t even really know what they were at all. “Did they catch you? Are they after you, now?” They wondered what kind of group it was, their mind immediately thinking of the worst kind of things. Criminals – who in Wynne’s mind were nothing but caricatures, like monsters under beds – or another community like their former one. 

They could not get involved in another person’s mess, could they? There was enough on their plate, first and foremost the shift they were abandoning. “How dangerous are they?” That they did want to know. “I believe you, that you didn’t hurt anyone or anything, but —” They shrugged, as if to finish the sentence with a non-committal you know.

Lil wondered if she shouldn’t have just kept moving instead of hiding at this coffee shop. She wasn’t sure what the other thought of her, and it made her anxious. Lil wasn’t ever great at first impressions - if the ghostbusters outside didn’t detail she wasn’t great at making third or fourth impressions either. Still, she had already chosen to stay here for as long as she needed too. 

“They aren’t that good at running,” Lil said probably unfairly. Part of it was just that she was bitter she knew - but they all relied on each other to help themselves out of situations, and Lil hadn’t had that for most of her career. She was much better at getting out of situations, because she didn’t think of asking for help or communicating with others. “Oh - no they aren’t bad people.” 

She wondered how to phrase this in a way that would calm the other, hoping not to make them think that they were going to do anything bad. “They would just drag me back home to talk to my mom - but she’s not there right now. Probably a lecture about how I’m still banned and that I’m not supposed to just poke my nose in their business.” She tried to gloss over her mom, not wanting to think about it. How the walls seemed to close in whenever Lil thought about her mom not being at home. Everything was crumbling around her, but the fact that she couldn’t hug her mom seemed to hit her deeper than most things.  “They wouldn’t hurt you or anything. It’s just less work for everyone this way. Also - I’ll get you some food or something if you want.” 

Maybe if Wynne didn’t carry the baggage they did, they’d wonder how a good person could be running from not-bad people. They could condemn the stranger, but in their case it would be hypocritical to do so. Hadn’t Wynne ran, too? From people who weren’t bad, but maybe not entirely good, too? A burst of compassion for the other’s situation spread through their body. It might just be them projecting, but even so, Wynne allowed it.

They looked at the other and wanted to trust their instincts. Instincts that told them to believe what the other told them, as Wynne’s instincts were wont to do. Instincts that were often wrong and got them too close to people dangerous for them. Gaze traveled over the other’s facial expression, though they remained upright as not to cause any more suspicion. “Alright.” 

It sounded eerily familiar and yet not at all. Would there ever come a day where people would show to drag Wynne to their mother? They weren’t sure if that was something they could face and if that were to ever happen, they hoped a stranger would help them. “Got it. Best we keep them from coming in here at all, then? For your sake.” They had to still be radiating some kind of nervousness, but if anything, Wynne also found some kind of determination. “Um, I’m not supposed to eat when I’m on the clock. But I could make you and I both a drink?” If the other paid, they hoped that was implied. Wynne wasn’t sure how much more trouble they could get into with their manager. 

Lil wasn’t sure what she had said that seemed to get the other to know that she wasn’t trying to bring them into any harm. It wasn’t something that she was generally good at, given her general demeanor most people found her as something frightening or frightening-adjacent. Still, they seemed to consider her and find her not bad. Maybe it was actually a lucky break for Lil. She would have to mention it to Jonas later.

“Okay.” She said making herself smaller, but noticeably becoming less tense. “Yeah I’d prefer if you didn’t have more problems then I’m already causing.” At comment Lil nodded, pulling out her wallet to make sure that she didn’t forget. “That sounds good, I can get whatever you’d want to. I’ll cover it.” After all, she didn’t know if the place would pay for the other’s drink and it was supposed to be something for them. 

The other seemed to calm a little and Wynne was glad for it. They weren’t sure if it was because of them, but if it was that was a nice thought to have: that they could make someone a little calmer. “It’s okay, strange things happen here all the time.” This was hardly the largest problem they had encountered, and as of right now all seemed somewhat well besides both of their nerves.

They gave a little smile. “That’d be great. I’ll give you my discount, though, okay? Fair’s fair. What can I make for you?” They should probably get themself a tea, but they wanted nothing more than another dose of caffeine. “I’m Wynne, by the way.” Their name tag also bore the name, but it still felt fitting to tell the other their name. “And let me know if you want me to grab you anything to eat, too.”

At the statement Lil couldn’t help the small laugh that came out, her forehead touching her knees for a second resting for a moment after all of the excitement. “You can say that again.” There was more of a relaxation as Lil figured she might behind the counter for a little while yet. 

At the statement she nodded slightly looking back up at the other and said, “Okay. I’d love a latte if that’s okay. - Oh I’m Lil.” She almost raised her hand and then realized that it would be a bit weird for the other- Wynne to reach down to shake it. “I’m good for right now but if you want anything to eat feel free to put it on my bill. - In fact if you ever want any good food, I work at the Bread Cemetery, the bakery that's downtown. If you come in and I’m working I’ll treat you to whatever you want.” After all, Lil supposed at the moment she partially owned the bakery, and even if she didn’t she’d be more than willing to pay for them. 

They reached down a little to shake Lil’s hand. “Nice to meet you. Even if it is in a bit of an unconventional way.” They smiled, before nodding. “I’ll get that latte going for you. What milk do you want? Cow okay?” Wynne definitely preferred cow. When they’d first heard of all the types of milk, they had expected the coffee place to also have goats and sheeps milk, but apparently there was even more than just that. 

They started up the coffee machine, nodding a little as the other spoke. “I’ve been there. I like the pastries, they’re very good. I’ll have to stop by more often. Do you bake the food?” That would be very cool, if Lil was the person behind some of the things Wynne had eaten. What a small world! “I’ll just have a coffee though, but I really appreciate it.”

Lil smiled back up at them and said, “Likewise. - Awesome. I appreciate it - and Cow milk is good.” She didn’t mind other milks, but it wasn’t something Lil particularly cared about either. 

At the knowledge that Wynne had been at the bakery Lil wondered again how many people ended up knowing her mom without her realizing it. She always wanted to ask if she had seemed happy when they were there - but she bit her tongue on that one. After all, Wynne had just witnessed probably more of Lil than anyone should have.  “You should and no - I’m a terrible baker. My brother makes a lot of them though. He’s really good at it. I just keep the front looking okay - even with all the stools” After all, Jonas had never almost burned down the house trying to cook. “Okay, but if you change your mind let me know.” 

Lil was still amazed by the kindness of a stranger to really think about it much more than she had. It felt nice and if she had believed in it something almost like home. Hopefully she wouldn’t have to oppose to much longer, but she did note that she should come around the cafe more often. 

As Wynne prepared two shots of espresso, they moved down to grab a carton of milk so they could froth it for Lil. “Got it.” The rhythm of preparing the latte was a nice one to fall back in, something familiar amidst a situation that had taken them by surprise.

She had a brother, that was nice to know. Wynne wanted to ask a few things about that, wondering how it was to have a sibling in this outside world. They missed Iwan, but they hadn’t figured out what to do about that just yet. “So we kind of do the same thing, then? But you with bread, and I with coffee. That’s cool.” Bread might be more fun to work with than coffee, but Wynne had to admit that they were very much into the different drinks they were now capable of making. “I will.” 

With the milk frothed and the espresso done (the smell of fresh coffee was something that always made Wynne smile a little), they looked down at the other, not sure what kind of cup to choose. “Do you want it for here or to go? Any syrup?” 

As the other started the coffee Lil did lift a small pocket mirror to see if anyone was still on the street, and finding no one wondered if they had decided ultimately, she wasn’t worth it. She really wasn’t. After all, what else could they do to her now. 

“Yeah! Although I’d say you have more skills than I do. I don’t think I could work that machine. Lil said thoughtfully, still waiting to see if anyone went past as she spoke to Wynne. It didn’t seem that anyone would. Looking up at Wynne while they looked down and pondering for a moment, she decided that she’d taken too much of the other’s time. She hoped in the future that she might be able to talk to them more, but well Lil should use this moment to make a break for home. She didn’t want to get Wynne in trouble after all, and - well she’d want the opportunity to come back one day. “I think I better take it to go - and if you have vanilla, I would appreciate it.”

#para: Wynne #all that is shown to me; paras

[chihirolovebot]

pspspspspspsp…………

hi!!!! i come bearing gifts! heeeere is physicist. i changed some aspects about them like turning the overalls from olive to black because i really enjoy the black/red/white palettes. i also gave them those gloves (for their science experiments where they mix chemicals up so their hands dont explode? i truly know nothing about physics). im definitely gonna overhaul their design at some point because i think they need more flair so they fit in with the rest of the dr cast yk. im still working on a full portrait of them atm (color shading etc etc) which i sincerely hope u will enjoy

also! i wanted to throw in here: PLEASE listen to me and michael + when you die (both my mgmt) if you haven’t already bc those 2 songs have kokichi/physicist written all over them.

the front pocket was not originally part of the overalls btw! they wanted a larger place to store more of their things so they clumsily tried to sew a pocket into an item of clothing without knowing much about sewing or anything. they were really bummed when it turned out looking weird but eventually came to enjoy the personality it added to their fit.

the kokichi doodle at the bottom is him playing with their glasses! they are basically just the talks a lot + listens dynamic,, also i feel VERY weird about kokichi’s hair i swear i messed up somehow while drawing it but i can’t figure out what exactly it was. the little stick figures of physicist and oma were me on my last brain cell but i think that’s them for the entire fic in a nutshell. oma likes to go on villain monologues and physicist is done with his bullshit!

the big physicist on the left is them posing for a picture! they look awkward because i imagine them being kinda camera shy. i also imagine whoever took the picture just kinda snuck up on them and snapped.

ah yes yes and the fan game! i’m partway through the prologue and if you want i can send you a short demo of the draft i have so far? so far it’s taken a turn from the traditional dr games since i got rid of the movement mechanic,, so now it’s more of like a VN than anything! i don’t know HOW i’m going to draw all the CGs and sprite customization options (thank you to @/goldentime for the idea by the way i really appreciate it :D) and write all the code as well as do the ost and decal and all that other stuff but i will find a way! somehow. it’s been really fun though and i’m actually very proud of what i have so far!!

anyways. ty for writing sleep awake! it’s crazy to me that such a long and gorgeously written fic is up on the internet for FREE. it’s definitely better than most original fiction is, and dare i say, much much better than the actual v3. i love what you did with chapter 3, the trial felt soo natural i forgot several times that it wasn’t what was in the actual game! it’s obvious how much time and effort you put into research, planning, and writing, and it really shows! so thank you <333

-

HELPPPP OH MY GOD THESE ARE SO FUCKING CUTE!!! im literally sitting so giddy here rn!!! ur mc is so special to me i LOVEEEE how they look so much god their vibe is indescribable... giving sad wet kitten energy. want to wrap them in a fuzzy blanket and place them gently on a pile of newspapers.

the gloves r such a neat addition!!! the block colouring n black and red kind of reminds me of the persona 5 artstyle which is a huge compliment!!! i lov their hair... their lil glasses... the freckles.... so so cute. will be turning this version of mc over in my head Forever !

hehe the little kokichi interactions give me so much life. the one of him fiddling with their glasses is so immaculate and u have their vibe absolutely down pat, 'talks a lot' and 'listens' is simply just THEM!!! oh but it sometimes goes the other way around when mc starts rambling abt physics n ouma is jus. jus sitting there. absorbing it all. mc's little blush is adorable and i totally think kokichi would just fiddle with their glasses or clothes while talking. is he doing it on purpose?? who knows???

I HAVE LISTENED TO WHEN U DIE BEFORE (it was actually my first mgmt song!!!) and holy shit ur so right. my third eye has been so closed,, and urs has been so open. definitely feels like kokichi talking to the mc like, putting on this evil mean facade, wanting them to hate him so he can keep up with his mastermind shtick and keep them at arms length but sigh, they know him too well and the act isn't holding up. i listened to me and michael because i hadn't heard it before and yes yes YES i see the vision. the closeness of two people being affected by red flags or toxicity or just other people or outside factors.... god. thinking so so hard abt this now and they're both going on the sleep awake playlist!!!

I WOULD LOVE FOR U TO SEND ME WHAT U HAVE ALREADY FOR THE GAME WHAT!!! WHAT!!! holy shit. it turning out like a visual novel is probably ideal, right?? i dont know anything abt game development AT ALL so forgive me if i say something dumb but most fan games dont include all the complex mechanisms from actual danganronpa games and most tend to just either be youtube vids or click and point thingies or just. yeah. visual novels!! which is so good.

as for the cg's and stuff, i dont rly know :( i would offer to draw them myself if i was any good at art, basically all im good at is sprite edits but im trash at anatomy and stuff so i rly dont think i would be any help. i would suggest commissioning but thats probably way too expensive, and again, like. i would commission stuff myself but im so broke at the moment. i COULD always commission some stuff when my student finance comes in, because i'll have a bit extra this year as my accommodation is way less expensive. but we can cross that bridge when we come to it i think!!! whatever ends up happening will be more than fine by me!!! im literally so excited

thank u so so much again for this art and for the game which i cannot believe is a real thing!!! i will treasure these for life <33

#submission #<3.kodzus #🏚.sleep awake

[rawiswhore]

Triple H/Shawn Michaels x Fem Reader- "Will Someone Please Think of the Children?"

The reason I put Triple H/Shawn Michaels is because the fem reader can either imagine reading about Triple H or Shawn Michaels in this fic, or even both.

______________________________________________________________

Being a parent involves being the best, most positive role model for your kids, as well as watching over them, because then your kids will copy you.

Being a parent also involves giving up doing many things (like using profanity) due to having to be a positive role model for your children.

If you're someone who has done sexual things---especially if you're famous---then your kids might end up seeing those sexual things you've done.

This is true of Madonna, Kim Kardashian, Cardi B, Beyonce, Britney Spears, Lil' Kim, Jenna Jameson, and even some WWE/F divas.

This can be true for some men as well, Eminem is an example.

Granted, Eminem used to rap some very violent, shocking lyrics, one where he tells his young daughter about murdering her mother, but...

In 2003, you were engaged to be married to Triple H/Shawn Michaels, and you and he were talking about having children together.

However, you were having doubts of having kids with him for certain reasons, and this was one of the reasons why.

While you were still engaged to him, during the end of 2003, you were sitting in a hotel room with Triple H/Shawn Michaels, telling him that you need to talk with him.

During your conversation, you sat next to Triple H/Shawn on one of the beds in the hotel room, with one of your hands holding his hand.

"We've been talking about having kids" you brought up while your eyes looked into his eyes. "And you know what a sexual person I am"

"Oh yeah" Shawn/Triple H mentioned, smiling and nodding his head as well as chuckling a bit. "Your nickname is the Nymphomaniac"

"If we have kids" you said "What if our kids end up seeing what I used to do and what I'm famous for?"

Your wrestling character/gimmick was a slutty, sexually promiscuous nymphomaniac who has done some very NSFW things on television and in magazines.

Shawn/Triple H's eyes grew wide.

"Ooh, that's a tricky one" Shawn/Triple H answered, pondering.

Shawn/Triple H had to think about what to say.

Although, Shawn/Trips isn't exactly a saint either.

Not only did Triple H used to point to his crotch and shout "suck it!" and make dick jokes during his D Generation X days, he also had sex with a corpse (although it wasn't a real one), beat a snake, drugged a woman and married her through a drivethru wedding, said racist things to a black wrestler ("you're here to entertain me with your nappy hair!"), cut a promo in blackface and other things.

Shawn Michaels used to point to his crotch and exclaim "suck it!", he also posed for Playgirl magazine, played a male stripper, stuck a bit of the Canadian flag up his nose and spray painted racist graffiti on a black wrestler's locker room.

"Well, just try to hide it away from our kids" Triple H/Shawn decided after thinking. "Don't have any magazines with you, don't let our kids watch your inappropriate stuff"

"I was thinking that too" you confessed. "Will we have to homeschool our kids? What if the students at our kids' school sees what I'm famous for and they bully our kids?"

"Will you still be wrestling when our kids are old enough to go to school?" Triple H/Shawn asked.

Touché.

Your eyes darted around, trying to think of what to say.

"I'm not sure" you suggested. "I'd get pretty old to wrestle, then"

"I've worried about our kids, if we have them, seeing our inappropriate things" Triple H/Shawn admitted. "I guess homeschooling is an option"

He shrugged after suggesting homeschooling.

"Even though our kids won't be able to make friends" you frowned, your eyes staring at the carpeted floor. "I'll have to give up being oversexualized and using sex to sell myself"

You actually retired from wrestling after having kids besides making a few guest appearances, and when you made guest appearances, you weren't really all that sexualized at all due to the WWE's current PG rating and the company becoming more family friendly.

"I don't mind changing for my kids" you confessed. "I'm just worried they'll see what I've done"

"Well, just keep it away from them" Triple H/Shawn suggested and coaxed. "Or tell them that wrestling is fake, they're just playing characters"

You nodded your head.

Indeed, wrestling is fake.

"Remember when Terri Runnels had that miscarriage a few years ago?" you asked.

"Oh God, yeah" Triple H/Shawn answered, his face disgusted.

"She didn't want to do that" you added. "Because she had a kid and was worried kids at school would bully her daughter over her mom having a miscarriage, but she was forced into doing it"

"That was just sick" Triple H/Shawn said, frowning.

"I agree" you agreed. "Although, she has posed naked and dressed in revealing bikinis and lingerie yet she has a daughter"

"Sable has a daughter" Triple H/Shawn brought up "And she took her shirt off to reveal those painted hands on her breasts and posed for Playboy while she had a daughter at home"

"And she wore that really revealing bikini at the end of 1997" you added. "After she took off that potato sack"

"And kissed Torrie Wilson" Triple H/Shawn inserted.

"Yet she sued the WWF as it was called then because they forced her into doing sexual things she didn't want to do!" you mentioned. "Which included lesbian angles, yet now she's kissing Torrie Wilson! What a hypocrite!"

You and Shawn/Triple H both had a laugh over this.

There are so many professional wrestlers that fit the bill under this.

Brian Pillman kidnapped Goldust's wife and turned her into his sex slave, even though Brian had kids at home.

Scott Hall was crotch chopping and shouting "suck it!" while he had a son.

This isn't just true of wrestling, but people and celebrities in general.

Britney Spears recently posed some nude photos of herself, including one on the beach, despite that she has 2 sons old enough to know about what she's doing.

After you had kids, you didn't let your kids watch the Attitude and Ruthless Aggression eras as well as ECW until they became teenagers.

However, you didn't let your kids watch your sexual moments in the Attitude and Ruthless Aggression eras as well as ECW, WCW and Women's Erotic Wrestling, you haven't even told your kids about your sexual moments.

You didn't have any sexualized photos or videos of yourself at your home while you had kids, you didn't even let your kids have social media when it blew up due to fear of your kids finding out about your sexual past.

When you had children, you homeschooled them due to fear that kids at school would see what you used to be infamous for, despite that your wrestling heyday was over by the time your kids were in school and you were nowhere near as oversexualized as you used to be.

You didn't really do anything sexual or inappropriate when your kids were old enough to remember and see.

You've tried and became the best role model for your children.

Even though you love your children, you also hate having to give up saying what you want to say and doing certain things you want to do.

Triple H didn't induct Chyna into the WWE Hall of Fame due to fear that his daughters would go online and find out about her porn career.

#triple h #shawn michaels #2003 #2000s #00s #mother's day #happy mother's day #wwe

[hayingsang]

Read in 2024

Michael Oakeshott, On Human Conduct

Edmund Neill, Michael Oakeshott

I read On Human Conduct a few years ago – exactly when, I’m not sure, as it doesn’t seem to turn up on any of my books-read list – but it made an impression, partly for being difficult, and partly for (as I recalled it) being an argument against using social concepts to explain things.

Rereading it, along with two books about Oakeshott – the one above by Edmund Neill and one late last year by Paul Franco – I would stick with both my conclusions, but adjust them a little, and add another one.

The argument against using social concepts wasn’t quite so clearcut on this second reading, but I think it’s still true. Essentially, Oakeshott says people don’t do things because of abstract things like “social forces”, but because of their interactions with other people. His target here seems to be the whole of sociology and much of the rest of the social sciences. The suggestion, for example, that people are shaped by culture, I would imagine he would have seen as derisory: your culture plays out in your encounters with others, either directly or (presumably) mediated through things such as books which you read, etc. He doesn’t say as much, but I think there’s the idea here that you are the author of your actions (which is not to say that your circumstances aren’t important – they clearly are – but you’re the one making sense of them with whatever mental tools you have available to you).

And he is a difficult writer. He writes negatively a lot (“things are not A, and nor are they B, nor C either …”), and certainly on a first reading he doesn’t give the reader much in the way of signposts to follow. Also he tends not to make arguments – having dealt with what things aren’t, he then asserts what they are – and he uses/invents a lot of latinate phrases, most of which are quite clear but with meanings modified to meet his needs. But reading him a second time with a goal (mainly to see if my view of his views on social forces was actually right nor not) was a lot easier than just reading him the first time round to see what he was about.

As to the third, what I found by far most interesting on my second reading was the book’s third and last part, “On the Character of a Modern European State”, and its suggestion that European states existed in tension between being civic associations – bodies based on laws that applied to all but which have no goals in themselves – and enterprise associations – bodies established to realise a goal. The traditional liberal state is a civic association, existing to let its citizens do whatever they want provided they don’t break the laws which govern them all; a socialist state would be an enterprise association in which individual freedoms come far behind the overall goal of advancing productive forces and welfare, with education aimed at socializing people to those goals. There is of course a lot more subtlety in Oakeshott’s argument than this, though perhaps less than you might imagine – though he obviously leans towards the civic association side, he also would have accepted that states also have goals they should strive to meet.

I think this is very much an argument worth making. For Oakeshott, it stems from Europe’s ways of ruling dating back to the middle ages, and how as states emerged they posed the problem of exactly what these entities which changed the way people were governed actually were.

Being a conservative, he saw tradition – habits passed on from person to person – as important and wasn’t interested in notions such as market forces or rights. Yet he was also an advocate of modernity – that in the 20th century versions of states, especially the more liberal ones, people could lead meaningful lives of their own making.

Neill and Franco’s books on Oakeshott I found useful – not so much for the politics side of his thinking, which I think you can unravel yourself without too much trouble, but for the other parts of his life and thinking, which I don’t think I would want to spend much time on.

[ladookhotnikov]

The Federal Reserve against Steablecoin

Michael Barr, the head of the US Federal Reserve, became concerned about the lack of American control over the Steablecoins. In his view, they pose a serious threat to the American financial system.

Is it possible to control such tools? If they were all on the territory of the United States – you can do it. However outside of American jurisdiction everything is very complicated.

If Steablecoin is backed by a dollar, it’s by nature a receipt - an obligation. The secured Steablecoin should not affect the financial system, as the sum of steablecoins is exactly the sum of the deposited dollars. The dollar is in the account, and instead, a receipt is issued.

But with an unsecured steablecoin becomes more and more difficult. The dollar itself is not secured, but is held solely by the authority of America. What would a Stablecoin like that stick to?

The authority of the cryptocurrency is held exclusively by public opinion. Really Mr. Barr that there will be a cryptocurrency that can override the authority of the US. In this case, one should fight not to control the Steablecoins, but to strengthen one’s own financial system.

Control itself is also complicated. How can you control a decentralized blockchain? Imagine all the employees leaving the States, and how to hunt them? File an international manhunt? Kidnap? In theory, anything is possible, but in reality, it is only theory.

Barr’s words showed a serious symptom of the American economy - uncertainty. Who would have thought, a decade ago, that the threat would be perceived by some unsecured dollar surrogates?

This is yet another sign of a changing world. I am sure that Mr. Barr is well aware, and his statement is not about a threat to the economy, but about the desire to gain access to new financial flows.

True, in this wish they will have to compete - too many willing to share success.

#FederalReserve #Steablecoin #Americaneconomy

[absentia-if]

I´m imagining what K and MC´s reunion is going to be like, like MC being very emotional and relieved to see K again, hugging them only to see Gabby right there and someone having to explain the situation and then mc being confused and withdrawn cause they don´t know to feel and feel kinda guilty? Oh the angst 😭

Also, I´d feel very much like an intruder into people´s life after being not a part of it for so long I can´t imagine the insecurities mc could possibly face, it must be a lonely thing 🥺 how would the RO´s deal with an mc who feels this way?

That’ll definitely be a fun scene to delve into it (I have the rough outline done but I’m excited to flesh it out). K will understand completely and feel anxiety bubbling within their chest because what are they supposed to do? How can their dreams be coming true and not turning into a complete nightmare? Gabby will read the situation within the room and politely excuse themselves after saying something to you; they don’t wish to impose their presence on anyone.

As for how the ROs would react?

Kade/Kara: “You’re not intruding on anything,” they immediately deny as they take your hand into their own. “Our life together isn’t over it—” They pause as they let loose a soft breath of air through their nose. “It was just put on hold for a little while, okay? You’re not on the outside looking in, I swear that to you, and I’ll do my best to prove that to you.”

Michael/Margot: A soft look etched itself across their face as they gently caress your cheek. The softest of smiles quirking their lips hoping to elicit the same reaction from you. “I’ve been the outcast for a very long time within my family.” They hook their fingers underneath your chin in order for you to look squarely into their eyes; they’re completely open gaze. “And, I swear on everything that I believe in, you’re not an outcast. You’re exactly where you’re supposed to be and I am exactly where I was meant to be. By your side.”

Blaine/Blaire: “Do you want to get away for a while?” The question was posed as they nuzzle happily into your neck; their arms looped loosely around your waist as they shift ever closer to you. Warm breath ghosting across your skin as a light chuckle escapes them. “You know my cousins have that cabin up north. I think it’d be nice to get away where it’s just the two of us. And I can show you that you’re not an intruder. You’re right where you’re supposed to be.”

Wren/Wynn: “I didn’t know you felt this way.” Their lips thin into a line as a troubled frown furrows their brow. “I wish there was something I could do, that I could say, that would change your mind but, I believe, that the only thing that can help is time. Time for you to see the happiness and joy that you bring into the lives of the people that love you. Time for you to see how much your mere presence helps them keep going. You’re not an intruder. You’re the farthest thing from it.”

Nicholas/Natalie: “How can you be an intruder when I’ve invited you into my life?” A confused frown furrows their brow as they gaze inquisitively at you. Their head tilting slightly, reminding you of Beau, as they cross their arms over their chest. “I don’t think you’re an intruder. You’re more like a very special guest that I’ve allowed into my life. That I’ve allowed into Beau’s. Don’t think that you’re unwanted because that’s the farthest thing from the truth. I promise.”

#absentia #kade lewis #kara lewis #michael steele #margot steele #blaine ellis #blaire ellis #wren cassidy #wynn cassidy #nicholas paxton #natalie paxton #beau paxton #beau #anonymous #asks #ask

[slasherhaven]

okay okay, now I REALLY gotta ask: following up on the art s/o request, how would the boys feel if they've found LEWD drawings of themselves in their love's sketchbooks 😏😏

The Slashers reacting to their S/O’s lewd sketches of them:

Thomas Hewitt 

Honestly...good for his self esteem. The sketches are definitely surprising to him, he wasn’t expecting them and he supposes it’s a way of reminding him why he shouldn’t go nosing around in your belongings. He’s definitely flustered but you must think rather highly of him to draw these...and looking at himself through your eyes, he can see himself more positively.

Still very flustered though. You drew these...adding all those details. Yeah, he’s extra thankful for the mask right now because he’s blushing. When you catch him with your sketchbook in hand, he’s even more flustered, and very apologetic. Will blush every time he sees those sketchbooks.

Michael Myers 

That usual stoic expression as he presents you with them. He places the open book down in front of you, lewd sketches of himself on the pages. You look up at him with wide eyes, unable to tell what he was thinking or feeling, as usual. He just looks between you and the pages, like he wanted an explanation. So you gave him one, even if you stuttered once or twice.

Silently teases you about it. He is admittedly curious about the images but more amused by your reaction. He doesn’t need to speak to tease you. Hiding the sketchbooks so that you have to ask him for them, randomly placing one of your drawings in front of you, sometimes you even know what he’s thinking just from the way he’s looking at you. And he never fails to get a reaction from you.

Jason Voorhees

Feels like he shouldn’t be looking at these. Even though they’re of him...he feels like they’re private to you. He’s certainly flustered and even more so if you catch him. He won’t approach you about it, that’s all your business, but he isn’t going to hold it against you either. Just maybe blush a bit whenever he sees you for a little while.

It’s a little...freeing. If he had stumbled across these when you first got together, he would be freaked out and probably distanced himself from you for a long time. But now, now that you already have an intimate relationship, that you’re close and you trust each other. It’s actually a little freeing because it’s all the more convincing that all of this is nothing to be ashamed off, something that you’re still trying to help him with.

Brahms Heelshire

Super smug. Look at how good he looks in these! You must really like him and must be really attracted to him to make and keep all of these. He’ll have them spread out around him as he examines each other. He didn’t realise you thought so much about his nude body, he’s going to have to bring this up to you! He has plenty of compliments, not really stopping if you’re flustered by his discovery.

Could you, maybe...do some of yourself? These are nice and everything, very flattering, but he would much prefer having some lewd sketches of you than himself. Oh! Better idea! How about you do some sketches of you both together? He would love those and some would definitely go ‘missing’.

Bo Sinclair

Not sure whether to be smug or freaked out. He just isn’t sure how to feel. It definitely feeds his ego and makes him even more cocky than usual but he also thinks it’s a little strange. He knows you’re an artist and everything but...would a photograph just be easier? No offence, Bo just does understand the artist process. All he knows if he would rather have a picture of you rather than a sketch.

Will tease you about it. Despite all of that, he knows what this means. You just can’t get enough of him, can you? Something about him must enthral you so much that you just have to spend your free time sketching his nudes from memory. That also makes him smirk, you’ve memorised every detail of his body. You’re feeding that ego and it’s your own fault!

Vincent Sinclair

Very flustered under the mask. That mask might be pale but his face his bright red. But does that stop him from flicking through your sketchbook? Not at all! He’s...curious, sure, that’s the word. All of these sketches of him. The artist in him admires the talent and detail. The normal guy in him wonders what you are doing drawing his body. Similar to Thomas, it probably builds his self esteem just a little.

Is more likely to show you his own. Of course he has done plenty of sketches of you, even before you were dating. You inspire him. He might have already shown you one or two but only ever the innocent ones. The more inappropriate ones he didn’t dare share with you. It felt wrong to make them but he loved them, loved you, so much. But you clearly have the same artistic inspiration so...maybe he should show you some of his sketches of you.

Lester Sinclair

Has to double check. Are these really of him? They really look like him. Do you really think he is worthy of drawing and of drawing like...this. Everything was so...accurate. You must have done this from memory, you must know his body better than him at this point. And he found something about that both flattering and...exciting.

Mutual embarrassment. You’re embarrassed because he found your sketches, he’s embarrassed because you just walked in on him flexing in the mirror. He was trying to see what you see! He’s just had an ego boost! He’s honest with you though, you don’t have to be embarrassed. He’s very flattered and they’re really good. And, well...you don’t have to stop drawing them.

Bubba Sawyer

This is him? Of course it’s him, it looks exactly like him, and who else would you be drawing in these...situations. He’s a little flustered but any of that is wiped away by his curiosity. He’s able to look past the lewdness of it all, just so proud of your talent. Then he focuses back on exactly what it was you were drawing and blushes ten times harder.

Let’s just hide these a little better, yeah? They’re very good, very impressive, and he likes them. But he couldn’t even imagine the teasing both you and he would get from his brothers if they found any of these. You both agree that they’re just for the two of you.

Billy Lenz 

Naughty, dirty, little Y/n...As soon as he sees the first one, he’s grabbing the book and heading for the attic to properly relax and examine them. Muttering to himself the whole time about how naughty you are for drawing these. And when you get home, he’s scurrying to meet you, forcing the sketchbook into your hands. Wrapping his arms around your waist and whispering in your ear all about your pretty drawing.

Maybe you should do more of these...including you. Really, he thinks they’re wonderful, very talented, very detailed. You should do more! But do you know what might be better? If you did some more of him that included you, wouldn’t that just be so much better, Y/n? Will keep his favourites up in the attic.

Asa Emory (The Collector)

Teases you about it. He just likes seeing you flustered, that’s it really. And this is the perfect opportunity. He’ll be sitting in the lounge, them spread out on the coffee table, two in his hands as he examines them. They’re good, he will give you that, but the look on your face when you find him like that is even better.

Becomes determined to make these sketches a reality. Asa now sees this as a challenge almost. Whatever fantasies you have put to paper, he wants to make them real. Every position, location, whatever it is, you will both work your way through them. Not that it feels like work.

Jesse Cromeans (Chromeskull)

Appreciates the art form. He prefers videos but he appreciates your preference for drawing. He particularly appreciates your art when it paints him in such a positive light. So you have these drawing of him...can he have some videos of you?

He’s not bashful about it. He’s flattered! He sees your talent and compliments you on it. But his new favourite thing to do? Taking one of those drawings and placing it down in front of you, making you look up at him, wide eyed and flustered. But it gets the message across just fine, this is the sketch he would like to recreate tonight. You’re pretty sure he only does it to make you flustered though.

Otis Driftwood

Is surprised but will tease you about it. He definitely wasn’t expecting this but it’s better than anything he could have guessed you liked drawing. It definitely inflates his ego that you’re drawing him at all and the fact that most of them are so lewd is even better to him. He doesn’t think they’re any need to be embarrassed or ashamed, they’re really good! But he can’t resist teasing you about your infatuation with him.

Will definitely show you his own (if he hasn’t already). It’s perfectly possible that he’s already showed you his pornographic sketches of you, and he has a lot of the. But if he hasn’t, this will definitely get him too. You show him yours and he’ll show you his, it’s only fair even to him. Plus he hopes it will encourage you to share any future sketches with him.

Baby Firefly

Is flattered and think you’re cute when you blush about it. She’s honestly just flattered and impressed. They’re good! You’re so talented! But if you’re embarrassed or blushing about her finding them, she will both compliment and reassure you while teasing you just a little. You’re too cute to not tease at least a bit.

Will pose for you in future. Baby doesn’t really have any embarrassment about this kind of stuff, and she clearly has nothing to be ashamed off if you keep making these. So of course she will pose for you, she might even get more into it than you.

Yautja (Predator) 

Are these for...science? No? When he first finds them, he believes them to be studies of his anatomy. He is curious about your race and it makes sense that you’d be interested in his, wanting to learn as much as you want. But as he kept looking through the sketches, he could see that these were not scientific.

Flattered. He’s not going to get flustered, this type of stuff doesn’t really bother him. He feels a sense of pride that you admire him so much to put your time into these, he’s also impressed by their accuracy.

#thomas hewitt x reader #michael myers x reader #jason voorhees x reader #brahms heelsire x reader #brahms x reader #bo sinclair x reader #vincent sinclair x reader #lester sinclair x reader #bubba sawyer x reader #billy lenz x reader #otis driftwood x reader #baby firefly x reader #yautja x reader #predator x reader #slashers x reader #slashers #slasher #my writing #asa emory x reader #the collector x reader #jesse cromeans x reader #slasher x reader #chromeskull x reader

[calpops]

missing pieces | c.h.

A big family gathering before Christmas leaves you contemplating the missing pieces in your life. The people who matter most help you through it.

2k words

Day 10 of 12 dates with calmas | dates with cal masterlist

Copyright © 2020 calpops. All rights reserved. This original work is not allowed to be reposted on any platform in any format (translations included).

❅ ❅ ❅

Everyone is gathered around the table. Calum’s parents, Mali, Ashton, Luke, Michael and their respective partners. Mila sits in her reclined high chair right next to you and Calum; she’s still too small for a proper high chair and too young for solid food. But everyone loves her company at the table and fawns over her without faltering. Calum reaches for your hand while he keeps one on Mila, the near six month old entertained by her dad’s little tickles and boops on the nose. There’s a happiness inside of you as you take in all of the guests for your Christmas celebration. But as you keep looking around a hollow wound begins to open and ache again. Not everyone is here. You bite your lip and bite back emotions threatening to bubble over. You don’t want to ruin the evening.

“I can’t believe how big she’s gotten,” Calum’s mother coos from across the table.

Both you and Calum don’t see her as growing. You still see the baby fighting for life in an incubator, your daughter that could fit in one hand. You know she must be growing, getting stronger and smarter and more adept to the world around her. But you don’t see it yet. The changes are so gradual that when you’re with her everyday they slip past your eyes.

“She’s still my little girl,” Luke says and everyone shoots him a look.

“No, she’s my little girl,” Calum corrects around a laugh and shaking head. “Someone needs to get you your own baby before you try to take mine.”

Luke blushes but not in the humbleness of trying to claim Mila. He shrugs and waves a hand through the air to downplay Calum’s suggestion.

“If she’s anybody’s…” Mali says and trails off to look at you with a smile.

That warms your heart though you know it’s only half true. As much as Mila is yours she’s Calum’s too. You both love her with all of your hearts and as far as you can tell she loves you both equally. If she’s not with both of you she’s with one or the other. Calum pulled her first laugh from her but he often reminds you she first smiled at the mention and sight of you. Everyone simmers back into Christmas conversation, asking about presents for Mila and plans for the big day. Calum goes nonchalant and you catch the forced casualty but don’t question it; so much else is already on your mind.

“Sweetheart, you okay?” Calum asks in a whisper pressed to your ear.

You nod, downplaying the fact that you’re not sure about that answer. It amazes you he can pick up on the subtleties in your mood even when you try to mask it with all of your might. You steel yourself, try to shake away the crushing feeling pressing down on you at two empty chairs. You squeeze Calum’s hand and quietly stand to get Mila in your arms.

“I’m gonna go feed her,” you explain and gently take her to you and quietly disappear down the hallway.

Calum sits back in his chair and quietly muses over what to do. He thinks he knows what’s going on, eyes trailing to the same two chairs that were once in your sights. He knows you have Mila and wonders if maybe you want space from the event around you or space from everyone.

“Everything alright?” Ashton asks, his seat diagonal to Calum’s, his ability to pick up on his best friend’s distress a natural talent.

“I’m not sure,” Calum answers honestly and stands to excuse himself and go figure it out. “I’ll be back.”

He roams down the hall quietly but quickly. The door to the nursery is open and the room is empty. He moves past it to your bedroom door that stands shut. He doesn’t hear anything and while it would normally be a sign of relief a little tremble of anxiety slices through him. Usually you’d be murmuring to Mila, giggling with her or if she wasn’t hungry already back out to join the dinner. He taps his knuckles softly against the door and calls out to you to announce that he’s entering.

He stops short as soon as the door is open. You have Mila in your arms but you’re not feeding her. You’re sat on the edge of the bed cradling her against your chest, rocking slightly back and forth as silent tears fall down your face. Calum can feel his heart shatter at the sight and moves on instinct to the two of you. You look up and meet his gaze but don’t say a word, both of you communicating silently; always knowing what’s on the other's mind and in their heart and worries. Calum gently coaxes Mila from your arms to put her in her bassinet by the bed. She seems mostly unbothered, not able to understand anything but the comfort of your arms. She stirs a little bit as she settles in but is okay enough for Calum to seek you out and offer his arms for you to fall into.

“You wanna talk about it?” he asks as he wraps you up in his hold and runs a soothing hand down your back.

“Yes, no, I don’t know,” you answer in a shaking voice. “I just feel so stupid. I should know better by now.”

Calum shakes his head at your words and the fact you genuinely feel that way. It wrenches at him. He knows exactly what you’re talking about and though he wants to defend you to the bottom of the ocean and back he wants you to come to some realizations on your own as well.

“They should do better,” Calum simply mumbles and runs his hands through your hair. He hopes you understand what he means. The struggle you’ve had with your parents being life long. You deserve better than empty promises and last minute cancellations.

“I thought maybe with Christmas and Mila it might be different, I thought they might try a little harder,” you finally manage to get out after a moment of prolonged silence. “It’s okay for them to cancel on me. I’m used to it. Mila deserves more. They haven’t even met her yet.”

Calum can hear the heart break in your words. He knows how heavily their absence in Mila’s life has hung over you. He sees the way you look at his parents interactions with Mila and the way you wish your parents would do the same. So many times you’ve tried to reach out to them and so many times they’ve let you down. He always reminds you that you have him and Mila and his parents and Mali and the guys as family but he understands it’s not quite the same and that a little hollow piece of you still yearns for your parents approval and care.

“You deserve better too,” Calum says and hopes you’ll believe it.

“It stopped bothering me for a while, I accepted they didn’t want to put in effort for me,” you explain around a few sniffles, face firmly planted against Calum’s chest as rogue tears stain his shirt. “It was pretty clear when they didn’t show up to meet you or to our wedding. I thought I was over it. Then we had Mila and almost lost her and it’s like they didn’t even care. Now it’s Christmas and they still don’t care. She’s the sweetest little girl, she deserves grandparents, she deserves everything. It breaks my heart. Why don’t they care?”

Calum has no answer to the shattering question you pose and even if he did he knows nothing—no answer or explanation—will ever justify their absence. He stays silent and holds you. Rocks back and forth with you in his arms almost like you both do with Mila. He can feel with every little motion that you’re trying to pull yourself together but he’s always been the place that you can fall apart. He doesn’t coax you to do anything. Just stays with you, becomes a presence to help fill the void.

“Sweetheart,” he finally mumbles after minutes of quiet. He feels your clutch on him tighten as you slightly shift to meet his gaze. His fingers lightly settle under your chin to keep you with him. “She doesn’t need them. They don’t deserve her or you.”

“What?” you mumble out the one worded question; clearly hearing the words but unable to grasp them fully.

“She doesn’t need them, she has me and you. You give her more love than imaginable,” Calum explains and you nod to show you understand. He lets out a breath and so do you though it shakes. “If they don’t care to try they don’t deserve to have you keep trying. You’re too good for them. So is Mila, look at her,” Calum explains further and coaxes you to raise your head and find your reason for everything. Mila smiles when you meet eyes with her and it’s enough to convince you of Calum’s words.

“I just feel bad she’ll grow up missing part of her family,” you finally admit and maybe it’s more or less about her and you.

“With all of those people out there who love her, she’ll never miss a thing,” Calum says and grins to himself as a thought enters his mind. “And I mean, Luke did walk you down the aisle so that kinda makes him her pseudo grandpa?”

You erupt into laughter and shake your head no. “Don’t even joke about that with him. He’s already vying for favorite uncle. We don’t need him fighting your dad to be the favorite grandfather.”

Calum purses his lips as he contemplates the very real possibility of that before laughing with you. He wipes away remnants of tears on your face and gives you another moment to collect yourself. Once he finds that you’re back together he gives you a little nuzzle. “Ready to get back out there?”

You nod and stand. Mila lights up and lets out a little noise as you bring her back into your arms. You keep her close and Calum stays by your side as you head back out to the dining room where your family waits. They all greet you warmly but don’t comment on or question your disappearance. You keep Mila in your hold instead of putting her back in her high chair. Small talk resumes and eventually Ashton proposes a toast.

“To a good holiday season,” he finishes.

“And to family,” you pitch in and make everyone agree. Glasses clink. “Thanks for being here with us.”

Everyone agrees with the sentiment and says there’s nowhere else they’d rather be. In that moment, gathered with those who love and care for you and your daughter, it’s easy to let go of those who don’t and to appreciate all that you have. When one of Calum’s hands grabs for yours and the other gently holds Mila’s you’re also sure there’s nowhere else you’d rather be.

—

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[haec-est-fides]

Hi, can we discuss how -- however he was influenced by Gaea -- Octavian was likely very familiar with the Triumvirate? It’s subtle, but it shows up most clearly in the way he talks.

(Personally, I think Octavian might have been raised by one of the Imperial Households, but you could just read it as him being in contact with the Triumvirate for a significant amount of time.)

The most glaring red flag imo is that we learn from Rachel (in Hidden Oracle) that the Greek / Roman parley in House of Hades was held on property owned by Nero. This is more important than the fact that Octavian was merely funded by Triumvirate Holdings, because a) it makes an in-person meeting more likely and b) Luke was also funded by the Triumvirate and he doesn’t have the same connection that I’m seeing in Octavian.

Looking back to the parley scene, Octavian goes so far as to mock Rachel by saying, “You’re the Oracle of Delphi? Right. And I’m the Emperor Nero.” It may feel like a throwaway line, but it’s foreshadowing, plain and simple. In universe, I’m almost entirely certain that the reason Octavian says Nero and not Augustus (his namesake, as he loves reminding people) is that he’d recently talked to Nero and knows whose building they’re on. It’s like a Freudian slip -- and it’s just the tip of the iceberg, because Octavian slips up like that a lot.

Let’s start small: Octavian tends to speak in a rather dramatic, formal way. (He says “alas” in ordinary conversation, for instance.) He’s intentionally dramatic and somewhat sarcastic at times, sure, but I think it goes deeper than that. {I bring up one of my headcanons here, but it isn’t the crux of the whole argument. Bear with me.} I find it likely that Octavian learned Latin as his first language -- namely from the fact that his family has been sending kids to Camp Jupiter for over a century and his attachment to the idea of being a true / traditional Roman -- which would have an impact on how he speaks English. It would make sense, then, that his English speech patterns are similar to those of other native Latin speakers -- like the Triumvirate.

Trials of Apollo shows us that the triumvirs also tend to use more formal English, such as avoiding contractions and using what we might consider to be dated terms and phrasings (though this certainly isn’t a hard rule). Again, I don’t think it’s really conscious, but rather a byproduct of being native Latin speakers. In Hidden Oracle, for example, Nero says (to Apollo), “My own forefather does not recognize me?” I’d consider both his use of the word “forefather” and his avoidance of “doesn’t” to be a concise example of what I’m talking about.

It’s also true that few other characters use “alas” like Octavian does. In Heroes of Olympus, it’s only gods / titans / monsters who use the word “alas” (besides Octavian). In Trials of Apollo, it’s actually Apollo himself who uses that word the most (though remember, he’s also the narrator). He says “alas” 5 times in Hidden Oracle and ups it to 12 in Dark Prophecy. Do I need to keep counting? Beyond Apollo’s narration, Macro, Medea, and Caligula all say “alas” at least once in Burning Maze. All of these characters speak ancient languages, and half of them are native Latin speakers. I’ll admit that maybe it isn’t wholly a Latin thing, but there’s still a case for Octavian speaking in a way that could have been influenced by the emperors and their entourages.

Moving a step beyond nitpick, the connection between Octavian and the Triumvirate can also be seen in what Octavian says and the words he uses throughout Heroes of Olympus. We can split the analysis into 3 ideological themes, really: loyal Romans, immortality, and the future.

In Son of Neptune, Octavian calls himself a “loyal Roman” in a conversation with Percy. It’s rhetoric, a succinct yet subtle way to express Octavian’s ideology / self-conception / political striving, and that’s exactly the point. Later, in Blood of Olympus, Michael Kahale criticizes the people that Octavian is recruiting into the legion, calling them murderers, thieves, and traitors. Octavian, on the other hand, calls them “loyal demigods” -- again, fully aware of the rhetoric of that statement. Bryce Lawrence, one of said recruits, calls himself a “loyal Roman” too in order to appeal to Octavian and be permitted to rejoin the legion after his exile.

The reason this recurring “loyal Roman” motif strikes me is that it’s eerily similar ideology and phrasing to something Nero says in Hidden Oracle. Apollo asks, “The other two emperors. Who are they?” and Nero responds, “Good Romans -- men who, like me, have the willpower to do what is needed.” A line from Caligula’s speech before battle in Tyrant’s Tomb echoes the same sentiment: “It’s time to be true Romans!” In Tower of Nero, Nero also talks about bringing back “traditional Roman values”.

Apollo hits the nail on the head with his commentary: “The fact that Nero -- a man who had killed his own mother -- was talking about defending traditional Roman values...that was just about the most Roman thing I could imagine.” The whole point in all of these cases is that the men talking know that the modifiers they use are 100% oratorical, are dog whistles to those who think the same way and near gaslighting to those who don’t. These modifiers -- “loyal”, “good”, “true”, “traditional” -- mean something entirely different to the person saying them than they do to the heroes / average person! That’s a fascinating and complex parallel.

Immortality comes up in similarly echoed ways, showing that Octavian and the Triumvirate seem to be on the same page, coming from the same viewpoint, thinking alike. In Son of Neptune, what Octavian says to Mars is interesting especially in light of the Triumvirate. Mars, explaining the danger posed by the open Doors of Death, asks the gathered legion, “Can you imagine a world in which no one dies -- ever?” Octavian, despite his showy deference, interrupts the god, “But, ah, mighty all-powerful Lord Mars, if we can’t die, isn’t that a good thing? If we can stay alive indefinitely--” Octavian isn’t outright stupid, so I doubt he’s entirely thinking through what he says here. Of course it would be bad for one’s enemies to never die, but if you consider Octavian to be the type to be tempted by immortality? His interruption seems more in character and more likely if he has immortals or even aspirations to immortality in mind at the time.

In Blood of Olympus, Reyna’s vision of the Roman war-camp gives more weight to what I’ll call the immortality hypothesis. She notes Octavian’s “gilded chair that looked suspiciously like a throne”, how his new title of Pontifex Maximus elevates him “almost to the level of emperor”, and of course there’s the altar: “a marble altar....no doubt for the gods. But to Reyna it looked like an altar to Octavian himself.” In Hidden Oracle, it comes up several times -- even from Nero himself -- that the Triumvirate turned the ancient Imperial Cult into something powerful, something that could make them immortal. The Imperial Cult, at its simplest, looked a lot like what Octavian is doing in Reyna’s vision. Whether the Triumvirate told Octavian to do any of this, he got the idea from them, or he came up with it on his own, it’s another sign of similar thinking, at the very least.

Finally, the future -- which, of course, is bound to come up often where an augur is concerned, but I’m thinking of one line in particular. In Blood of Olympus, Octavian tells Michael about his plans, blatantly admitting that he’s aiming to declare himself “First Citizen” like his ancestor Augustus. (That title is princeps in Latin, and it’s an imperial title all three of the triumvirs use.) His Augustan lineage, which makes Octavian a legacy of Apollo from the same bloodline source that both Nero and Caligula get that status from, is another puzzle piece. Octavian is open about his heritage, his family is recognized as wealthy and powerful in New Rome and yet is never present there, and the Triumvirate seems unlikely to lose track of their relatives. Even so, what Octavian tells Michael next is a less speculative tie: “We will rule the future.” This is, specifically, the way Apollo frames the threat posed by the Triumvirate throughout Trials of Apollo once he becomes aware of their plan regarding Python and the oracles. A lot of that description comes after Apollo hears something Nero says to Python: “When we control all four Oracles, we will control fate itself!”

I suppose a facetious TL;DR might be that if you told me that Nero (canonically the best orator in the Greco-Roman Riordanverse) had been giving Octavian (canonically the best orator at Camp Jupiter) lessons in oratory or that Caligula had taken Octavian under his wing and every Tuesday they talked about world domination over coffee, I wouldn’t be surprised in the slightest.

Maybe this post is more of a Rorschach inkblot test for myself and how I read these books. Maybe I’m trying to read way too deeply. Whatever the case, I think that there’s something more to be said about Octavian and the Triumvirate than funding, and no one has been saying it.

#trials of apollo #toa #tower of nero spoilers #heroes of olympus #hoo #hoo octavian #triumvirate holdings #toa nero #toa caligula #toa apollo #I'm not tagging everyone #filodox! #basically this post is my attempt at writing out a vibe / something my intuition picked up on so idk if it really makes sense #or looks entirely crazy #you decide

[spaceskam]

On The Side Of The Road

for a late day 6 of @isobelevansappreciation​: emotions/healing

Summary: After picking up Alex from the military base, Isobel and Alex get stranded on the side of the road and encounter someone with not-so-great intentions.

Warning: creepy guy with creepy intentions, mild violence, trauma, fun stuff like that

ao3

Isobel hated every single thing about this.

“It’ll be fun, he said. Bonding, he said. You have so much in common, he said,” Isobel grumbled before roughly kicking the flat tire that decided to pop when they were nowhere near anything and there was no cell service.

“Isobel,” Alex said calmly, “I’m going to change it, don’t worry. We’ll be out of here in no time.”

Isobel rolled her eyes and crossed her arms, watching the Airman run his fingers through his hair a little too dramatically for the situation. It wasn’t that she didn’t like Alex, but she didn’t know the guy well enough to spend a five-hour car drive with him and she didn’t really trust anyone in the military because it was easy to assume they all had a power fetish. But it was for Michael so she’d agreed. Now she was regretting it.

This weekend was their 23rd birthday and the one single thing Michael wanted was his boyfriend to come visit him. After some last-minute arrangements and a little bit of influence, Isobel had convinced Alex’s boss to let him have the weekend off. But Alex was apparently scared of planes (which was downright comical for someone in the Air Force to be scared of planes, by the way) and Michael couldn’t afford to take the day off of work to go get him, so that left Isobel.

She hadn’t expected to run over something sharp enough to pop her tire though.

"Where is your spare?" Alex asked, already digging through her trunk.

"I'm already using my spare," Isobel said, gesturing towards the back wheel. He stared at her for a solid 30 seconds in disbelief.

"You're joking," he said blandly. Isobel raised her eyebrows to say she absolutely wasn't and that's why she was so irritated. She didn't want to be stuck with him in the middle of the goddamn desert. "Right."

Isobel watched in veiled amusement as Alex felt his pockets and pulled out his phone, squinting as he held it up to try to find signal. She watched him walk around in search and spent that time trying to figure out what exactly Michael saw in him.

He was handsome enough, she guessed, but he'd gone from a fashion disaster in high school to a military man with unflatteringly short hair and plain clothes that could be on any man in the entire US. The few conversations she'd had with Alex had told her nothing about him, even their car ride consisted of short answers. Imagining that with Michael didn't make sense.

Isobel was broken from her daze as he jumped onto the hood of the car and walked to stand on the roof.

"What are you doing?!" Isobel yelled. He ignored her, squinting up at the sun as he held the phone to his ear.

"Guerin? Hey, can you hear me?" Alex said into the phone, voice the same exact tone as it was when he spoke to her. She didn't like that either. She saw the way Michael melted when he thought about him. He deserved sweetness too. "Shit, look, if you can hear me, Isobel's tire is blown. We're 40 miles northwest of Roswell. I'll try to send a text."

Alex ended the call and stayed posted up on the roof of the car as he typed out a message, clearly posing as if he had a photoshoot no one else knew about before jumping off. Isobel stared dully at him.

"Am I supposed to be impressed?" she asked. 

"No," he said, shrugging off his jacket so he was left in a plain white tank top and plain baggy jeans.

Clearly, she was supposed to see something in him that she saw in herself. Michael always said how similar they were, but she knew damn well she wasn't that closed off and boring. Or, at least, she hoped.

Alex's phone dinged with a message after a few minutes of him pointlessly inspecting the tire and he looked at it with a bored expression.

"Michael said he's on his way, but it'll probably take him at least an hour to find us," Alex explained, pushing himself to an upright position again. 

"Oh, so we can call him Michael as long as he can't hear?" Isobel asked. Alex raised an eyebrow.

"What?"

"I've only heard you call him Guerin to his face.”

Alex didn’t reply as he kicked the tire and then sighed. She waited for him to respond, but it didn’t happen and he just leaned against the car. Isobel stared at him and he stared at the ground. The silence seemed to drag on as the sun just beamed down with unforgiving heat, but Alex easily seemed to be in a spotlight. She hadn’t really noticed that he was attractive before since he wasn’t her type (and she definitely wasn’t his), but he seemed to glow like a model under the sun. His skin was tanned and his biceps were sculpted. She could understand why Michael liked at least that.

Isobel was nearly sweating by the time she said, “You know, Michael wanted us to bond, but you don’t talk very much.”

“What’s there to talk about?”

“I don’t know, what’s it like being queer in the military?” Isobel asked immediately. He shot her an icy glare that made her have to hold back a smile that, after hours of being locked in a car with him, she got a reaction. “What, gonna try to deny that?”

“I didn’t deny shit.”

“Okay, then what’s it like?” she prodded. Alex huffed a dry laugh and shook his head.

“How about you tell me what it’s like to be white and thriving off Daddy’s money in the suburbs?” Alex shot back. Isobel raised an unbothered eyebrow.

“Shouldn’t you know a little about that too?”

“My dad’s got money,” Alex said, a cynical smile on his face as he held out his hand as if that was enough explanation for the other part he didn’t quite fit, “Not me.”

“Fair enough,” Isobel agreed. Alex took a deep, grounding breath and then to sit on the hood of the car. Isobel gave him a few seconds before following and sitting beside him.

“Oh my God,” he groaned softly.

“You know, you should learn to like me,” Isobel said, “According to Michael, we’re very similar.”

“I don’t see it.”

“Neither do I.”

They sat on the car in silence again. The cynicism seemed to boil between them as they waited for Michael, so, when a truck pulled up in front of them, they both let out sighs of relief. Except, when the dust settled, it was clear that it wasn’t Michael and the figure of a man sat in the driver’s seat instead.

“Get in the car,” Alex said, eyes narrowed as he sat up straighter and stared at the truck, “Lock the doors.”

“What? It’s not that big of a deal, he’s probably just offering help,” Isobel said. Alex shook his head.

“Get in the car and lock the doors” Alex repeated, sliding off the hood.  

Isobel didn’t move as he walked with a confident air, shoulders back and a cocky swagger in his step. Michael liked to imitate that walk when he was pretending to be big and bad, but he was always comically bad at pulling it off. Alex, on the other hand, actually managed to look at least semi-intimating and entirely capable when he did it. She might’ve been impressed if she wasn’t scared that would piss off the stranger in the truck.

The guy got out of his truck with his hands shoved deep in his pockets, looking perfectly normal and not at all scary if not for that one little fact. Alex seemed to spot that right away and angled himself so his left side was closer towards the car.

“Y’all need some help?” he asked.

“Thanks, but we have someone a few minutes out,” Alex responded.

“You sure about that?” the guy asked, eyes going to Isobel, “‘Cause I bet the pretty little lady you got there might not wanna wait in this heat. You really gonna make her wait?”

“Yeah,” Alex said cooly, not moving as he provided a block between the two of them, “I am, actually.” 

Isobel had her nose scrunched up in disgust, but she appreciated Alex’s dismissive attitude. That was the first time she could see herself in him like Michael always said.

“Thank you, but you can go now,” Alex said.

“I can stay until your ride gets here,” the guy said. Isobel silently questioned if Alex was psychic or just so paranoid and it was simply a coincidence that he was right.

“No, we’re fine,” Alex said firmly.

The guy’s eyes found Isobel again and she just kept her stern face of disgust. She’d decided a long time ago not to be scared of men anymore. Sure, the drifter was scary and so were all the other creepy men she encountered on a daily basis, but she had learned how to take care of herself. She refused to give them the satisfaction.

“You want me to stay, don’t you?” he asked Isobel, tilting his head in her direction. She gave a smile and waved goodbye wordlessly. He laughed and went to take a step closer.

Alex put a hand on his chest before he could get around him, not-so-kindly pushing him back. Another check in the box of what Michael saw in him.

“Oh, c’mon,” the guy said.

“Fuck off,” Alex told him, unmoving. 

“You heard the man,” Isobel said, trying not to sound too playful despite her utter enjoyment at watching Alex shut him down, “Fuck off.”

“I’m just tryin’ to help, you don’t have to be so ungrateful,” the guy said, fiddling with his pockets a little more. Isobel watched his hands carefully and hoped this wasn’t about to turn into a shitty horror movie. She didn’t sign up for that. She barely signed up for picking up Alex in the first place.

The guy took a step forward again and Alex again pushed him away. However, the guy took his hands out of his pockets and pushed him back. Isobel sat up straight, adrenaline pumping through her as she tried to figure out how to prevent her brother’s boyfriend from getting beaten to a pulp.

By the time the first two punches were thrown, she slid off the hood of the car and ran over to them. She grabbed Alex’s arm and pulled him away and stood between them, letting Alex still glare over her shoulder as he wiped a bit of blood from beneath his nose.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” Isobel snapped over her shoulder at the strange man, “You just pulled over looking for a fight?!” 

He gave a cold little laugh, all too similar to what that drifter had sounded like that night almost 10 years before, and he reached out to grab her waist. And Isobel realized that it had nothing to do with looking for a fight from Alex at all.

“Get the fuck off of me!” she yelled, squirming just enough to get where she could elbow him between his legs. He groaned, letting her fall to the ground pathetically. Her heart was thudding in her ears and she was breathing heavily, but she managed to scramble to her feet quick enough to not show any ounce of weakness to the stranger.

Alex had grabbed him by the shirt collar while he was down and dragged him back to his truck, slamming the door. Isobel spat on the hood so she could at least do something.

“Man, y’all are fuckin’ crazy,” the stranger said as he quickly started up his truck. A whole slew of obscenities came to Isobel’s mind in response, but her heavy breathing only allowed her to hold up her middle finger. Alex stayed right by the truck until it peeled off.

Once he was completely out of sight and the initial adrenaline started to fade, Isobel felt like she couldn’t breathe. Tears burned at her eyes and that stupid, stupid fear that he was going to come back for her burned in her mind. With the drifter, even after watching Max tackle him to where his head slammed against a rock and even after watching Michael dig a grave for an hour straight, she always felt like he was going to come back. She’d finally gotten over that feeling.

“Isobel?” Alex asked, voice soft for the very first time, “Hey, are you okay? I’m sorry I let him grab you like that, but he’s gone now.”

She struggled to find her breath, struggled to hear him properly, struggled to do anything but feel overwhelmed with fear. Alex held his hands out in front of her eyes, a silent way to ask if he could touch her. She gave a short little nod despite not wanting him. She wanted her brothers, but they weren’t here. Alex would have to do.

Instead of a hug though, Alex gently grabbed her arm and led to help her sit down on the sand. They both sat criss-cross across from each other, their knees touching. He still had blood under his nose, but he didn’t seem to mind as he looked her in the eye.

“You’re allowed to feel this way,” he said and he held her hand, just being there until she was able to calm herself down.

She felt so stupid. Logically, she was overreacting. It wasn’t that big of a deal. Would she still feel like this if she didn’t have that experience with that drifter? Would still she feel overwhelmed? Would she still want Michael and Max as much as she did? But no matter how stupid she felt, Alex kept saying that she was allowed to cry and overreact and be this way. He wasn’t freaked out. He didn’t ask questions. He just told her it was valid.

And she really understood what Michael meant about them being similar.

Eventually, her crying subsided and she calmed down enough to at least pretend to be normal. She would probably hug Michael once he got there until she felt all the way better, but she was okay.

“Thanks,” Isobel said, drying her eyes with her hand that wasn’t still gripping his.

“Don’t thank me,” he said. She looked at him for a moment and weighed the options of telling Alex about the drifter so he would understand a little better. It was obviously not her place to tell the actual aftermath of it, but she could tell him the first part.

“On our 13th birthday, Michael, Max, and I went out camping and I left the tent to go pee, so I was by myself. Then this guy came out of nowhere and grabbed me and started dragging me away, I’ve never been so scared in my life,” she admitted. Alex didn’t show much emotion other than his eyebrows raising slightly. “Max and Michael had to fight him off. I was so fucking helpless and I told myself I would never be helpless again. But I guess I still am. What a great 10th anniversary reminder, am I right?”

“What are you talking about, you’re not helpless. You got that guy to let go of you and, if I wasn’t here, you probably would’ve easily beat the shit out of him yourself. You were back on your feet in seconds. You’re a fighter, that’s what fighters do,” Alex said. Isobel shook her head, looking over to the side. “Hey, I’m serious. That wasn’t proof that you’re still helpless, that was proof that you’ve grown. Trauma doesn’t go away, but you’ve clearly done a damn good job at making it your bitch. You held your ground until you were safe and that’s the best you could’ve possibly done, so don’t beat yourself up about it. You did great. I’m proud of you.”

Isobel huffed a little laugh, “How many years of therapy have you had?”

Alex scrunched up his nose and held up his hand, his thumb and index finger about an inch apart. Isobel shook her head through another laugh before sniffling. They sat there for a few more minutes before Isobel eventually got up so she could go fix her makeup and not look like a crying mess.

“Can we not tell Michael about this?” she asked cautiously, “Like, we can tell him the situation, but not the part where he grabbed me? Because I know him and Max and I don’t want to deal with that.”

“Absolutely, no problem,” Alex said, “Don’t really wanna deal with telling him that either.”

Isobel sat in the driver’s seat and Alex sat in the passenger seat, each of them touching up their face in respective ways. Both of them made a few small comments here and there, keeping the conversation light and the mood high. This day would just be their little secret.

By the time Michael pulled up, it was easy to pretend like nothing really happened and that the tight hug she gave him was her simply being dramatic over her busted tire.

#isobelevansweek20 #isobelevansappreciation #isobel & alex #isobel & alex fic #isobel evans #alex manes #roswell new mexico #my fic #sorry it's so late i passed out last night