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#i know a lot of people are down about their productivity
shakingparadigm · 14 days
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what is the theory that ivan manipulated the event where till and mizi met the wagyein?
It's not a theory, actually! It's confirmed that Ivan orchestrated the whole event. The true reason as to why however is still unknown. The information provides more context to this scene, though:
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During the earlier times of ALNST the most rational explanation for this scene was that Till ran after a flower crown (presumably Mizi's) and Ivan followed him in out of curiosity. Now we know that Ivan was conveniently just standing there because he was waiting.
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Side note, I find it heartbreaking (and maybe a little funny, sorry) that Till most likely didn't notice Ivan in this scene. That's just like him, isn't it. Always too busy running after Mizi while Ivan trails behind, an ever-present shadow.
I'm not sure how Ivan manipulated the circumstances for both of them to end up there, but it is confirmed that everything was intentional. What strikes me most is how they describe this particular scene:
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I can't copy down what they said word-for-word (Patreon info), but they described Ivan watching "creepily" as Till and Mizi are faced with danger. We know that Ivan was familiar with the Cerberus wagyein beforehand, enough to touch its teeth and even to rest himself inside its maw. To Ivan, the wagyein is not dangerous, but to Till and Mizi, it could be. Ivan prepared the wagyein, led them there, and watched "creepily" from afar as Till fell on his knees, seemingly injured.
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The closest I can get to making sense of Ivan's "scheme" is that he wanted to see how other children would react in a dangerous situation. Ivan's always been an observer, after all, and he's learned to survive by copying the more "normal" behaviors of his peers. This situation occured when Ivan was still young and had not yet developed his more charming mask, so perhaps he staged this encounter to study a situational response, to learn and mimic the emotion of fear. And what better subjects for the experiment than two of the most expressive and reactive humans of their batch? It helps that he was already fixated on Till beforehand, too. I think Ivan became irreversibly obssessed after this incident, especially since it's framed as a turning point in Ivan's life, comparing Till to the stars.
This is just my attempt at an interpretation, though. It could very well be for another reason. He most likely chose Till and Mizi specifically for personal reasons, not just for reaction. I'm still not sure on the purpose behind the whole thing.
The team wanted to capture Ivan's "dark emotions" through the shot of his stalking, which could relate to his more sinister intentions. His gaze can be read in a few different ways, though. Curiosity, interest, fear, etc. Maybe that's why they decided to redraw the shot in ROUND 6.
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I think this better sells the feeling they were trying to convey.
#ivan u fucked up little guy.#also okay i just wanna clear this up#i know i make a lot of posts about ivans darker side and his more problematic traits#but this isn't me trying to villainize him or reduce him down to “toxic yaoi”#I HOPE YOU GUYS KNOW ALL MY TOXIC YAOI POSTS ARE LIGHTHEARTED.#i just want to clarify that ivan was always intended to be a darker and complicated character. even since his debut in round 3#the way i refer to ivan (“twisted” “creepy” “obssessive” etc) are literally the direct words used by q and v themselves to describe him#but despite that id like to emphasize that i don't see ivan as a villain or a completely bad person. hes complicated#there is no normalcy in this world they are living in. none of the characters know what being truly normal is#this isn't me condoning his actions#but it has to be acknowledged that alnst is fucked up in nature. we can't expect perfect relationships from people who are born to die#plus ivan has a lot more layers past the “dark” parts. he's constantly battling himself and his desires#especially at the end of round 6 where he performs a myriad of conflicting actions (kiss strangle peck smile)#thanks to the r6 production notes we now know that ivan was going through a rapid internal conflict#“sure and unsure at the same time”#there is sooo much to ivan. his low self-esteem. his desire and possessiveness despite knowing till will never love him#his VEHEMENT insistence that till will never love him vs his desperate persistence in trying anyway#uh i need to shut up i think#anyways sorry. just wanted to clarify my thoughts on him in case people think im. yk.#in short. hes a fucked up little freak and he fascinates me. this poor tragic child. i love him.#SORRY I GOT CARRIED AWAY#alnst#alien stage#alien stage ivan#alnst ivan#asks
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inkz123 · 24 days
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Man finishing school term and wanna rest, draw and work on comms more, but then like 2ish weeks later, boom, gotta fix stuff to start the new school term again
Mannn i just wanna do nothing but draw blorbos and backed up ideas and all the sketch wips i havent even finished ; ;
Idk school for me just throws off the vibes fr fr
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lovelaceisntdead · 9 days
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i think i just need to rewatch lost.
#that will fix me i think.#because i am doing. bad. i know i have not been keeping this a secret but i feel very stuck and i don't really know what to do.#my general anxiety levels are much higher than they usually are and um. i don't really know why. which then just makes it worse.#and i feel so down and hopeless. i can't make myself feel excited about things. i have hardly any motivation#and no energy to do anything even if i did#like yellowjackets s3 starting production and i just don't feel excited about it and it's making me really sad#and I'm getting upset about things that i feel silly for getting upset about and i can't say anything because I'm embarrassed#for being upset in the first place#i feel so incredibly disconnected from everyone around me it's so hard to talk to anyone#I'm running on autopilot most of the time at the moment#and I'm finding it so hard not to push people away. but at the same time i feel so out of place and I'm dissociating a lot so.#idk whay I'm saying with this#i just feel like i need to get stuff out because i feel so anxious i might explode#and with the weather getting warmer a lot of my physical symptoms are flaring up. anf being in this house is so suffocating#i feel like i can inly exist in this perpetual state of fine. can't be any worse can't be any better#I'm just constantly pretending that I'm just Okay because it's easier than having to deal wirh anything else. but i know I'm really just#causing myself more harm.#I'm done now. just trying to relieve some of the pressure i am feeling in my whole entire body.
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andthebeanstalk · 1 year
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I HAVE BEEN LEARNING ABOUT MISTER AUGUSTUS OCTAVIAN/OCTAVIUS GAIUS CAESAR SINCE 8TH GRADE. HOW AM I STILL LEARNING MORE THINGS ABOUT HIM THAT MAKE ME GO "octavius babe holy shit what the fuck what the FUCK dude"
#roman history#overly sarcastic productions#Augustus Caesar#octavian caesar#octavius caesar#original#like is he as crazy as nero? no. but the thing about emperors like nero and caligula is that while a lot of us know their names because#they were so unhinged - they were too violent and volatile to actually have very effective reigns as rulers.#their effect on history is limited in some ways because a mad king will go down in history for madness but little else#but Augustus Caesar was the most ruthless ambitious terrifying motherfucker to ever meddle in the Mediterranean#he makes Julius Caesar look chill. he was so GOOD at political ruthlessness during a time of upheaval that he made himself into a GOD#we still have months named after him and his adoptive father and i live in North America just about 2000 years after he died!#he re shaped a huge part of the world and i have been studying greco roman culture for so much of my life and HOW is it i JUST#found out that this bitch SACRIFICED OTHER ROMANS TO THE GODS. WHICH WAS NOT. A. THING. PEOPLE. DID. EVER. IN. ROME.#and then AFTER THAT he becomes a GOD EMPEROR. how????#did the sacrifices... WORK?!#like i cannot emphasize enough that I have learned specifically about Roman culture for years#and this is the first I have ever heard of an instance of human sacrifice. it wasn't a thing! it was wicked not a part of their religion!!#and he just did it as a political move. because he was fucking crazy.#and I'm just going to go ahead and use that language because I am a person with severe mental illness and you can bite me.#octavius caesar was fucking crazy. not in the mental illness sense tho - in the HOLY SHIT THAT SHIT IS FUCKING CRAZY sense#although All Things Considered he probably did at least have some kind of trauma regarding all the murder and war and stuff#I once saw a gender swapped production of Julius Caesar and it was really good#and I remember being terrified of my friend lucette playing Octavius. it was great#HUMAN SACRIFICES. IN FUCKING ROME. WHAT. FUCKING WHAT. I AM LOSING MY MIND#how the FUCK did this man manage to remain politically successful after this????? I guess it helped that there was no internet#it's not that I'm surprised about brutality in Rome it was their whole brand it's that this particular form of violence is extremelY#not something that romans DID. like it just wasn't part of the culture this wasn't a thing
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ashofalltime · 2 months
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i truly have no idea what to make my "art brand" other than Hot Boys With Thick Eyebrows :/
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britneyshakespeare · 10 months
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can’t stop intellectualizing about barbie
#maybe ill post a rant later#tales from diana#it's funny. i've written a lot in my private diaries and notebooks about how much i love dolls and have always loved dolls#and what an impact they've had on me personally and wider popular culture#and why i view them as both products and art#etc etc etc#but i dont really try and convince others of those points even on this personal blog where ill rant about truly ANYTHING stupid i want#its not like im worried about anyone judging or tearing apart my opinions (my followers first of all would never)#(i dont think tumblr generally would either. maybe some pockets of tumblr but theyd have to find it somehow)#i guess for me its just a very introspective topic first of all bc it goes back to my early childhood and covers basically all of my life#and i dont assume the history of my life is something that interests most people very much#like most ppl dont really wanna hear about how many similarities i find between playing w dolls and writing poems#(altho ive written and posted poems on that topic before!)#it would be interesting specifically to ppl who know me well. which is probably why ive also talked about this a lot w my sister#kaily and i would literally play games of dolls that would last entire days for like several days in a row#playing w dolls was my FAVORITE thing in the world hands down as a kid. and it did so much good for me#but also barbie and other fashion dolls are so culturally and historically significant and impactful in many underappreciated ways#justice to all doll lovers. xoxoxox
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neverdoingmuch · 8 months
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the issue with what-about-ism is that it should have been an excellent opportunity to challenge someone's stance by introducing another point of view and expanding the bubble that people live in, and instead it's become an opportunity to suggest extreme edge cases that are treated as a joke rather than an additional voice in the matter (and yeah, most of the time it does feel like a joke if not just a sign of someone missing the point).
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medicinemane · 1 year
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#I'm not saying I'm perfect; but I'm saying I can at least cite places where I've changed my mind when given new evidence#I used to be hardline pacifist; shut down all military everywhere type thinking#but I saw the horror of what was happening in Ukraine#and it didn't take much for me to see that the only solution was to give them the weapons to defend themselves with#and sadly that means I have to admit that weapons manufacture does serve a purpose and is required even if it shouldn't be#and it means... fucking having to admit the DOD needs to exist even though I hate them#doesn't mean I don't get to think that they need to... you know... pass a fucking audit#and doesn't mean I don't think they need to be reigned in; that there's dangers to opaque cultures like military culture#and it doesn't mean... doesn't mean I like the army or the military industrial complex#just that... as I understand more about defense economics and logistics... I against what I want to see#begin to see points to making large numbers of missiles and shit because... quantity of production can bring prices down#you can end up getting a lot more for the same price; and... and you can sell them; which again I morally oppose but...#I'm coming to accept is just a fact of life when you have people willing to invade their neighbor#maybe you should sell them some weapons; recoup some of the insane spending you've done; and give them tools to defend themselves#I fucking changed my mind on this despite frankly finding it all abhorrent and thinking the US is run like a shit show#because sometimes the reality of things has to win out over what I think should be the reality of things#and sometimes the wellbeing of Ukrainians outweighs if I believe in war or not#I may not fucking be close to perfect; and there's probably plenty of places I'm wrong about shit#hell; even here I could actually somehow be wrong#(though I'm sorry... it's hard to see the people suffering horribly and not think they need to be able to defend themselves)#but at least I fucking am capable of changing my mind... which I feel like is more than some of you#you'll never fucking acknowledge that you might be doing great great great harm based purely on belief#while I in disagreeing with you at least admit I could be wrong but am acting on my best information#at least I fucking stumble and grope my way through life without the knowledge of good and evil#I'd far rather than then boldly stomp my way through life so certain I'm right; the bodies under my boots be damned#fuck you for your dogmatic points of you; and worst of all fuck you for not even meaning to be cruel or cause pain#yet still closing your eyes to any pain you do cause because you know you're actually right#you spin every last thing that defies what you believe till it only reinforces it#and I see no way to get you to sit down at the table and try and figure out what's best for everyone#because you'd just boldly proclaim you already knew and demand I agree
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im-smart-i-swear · 1 year
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self-indulgent fnin doodles cause existance is Not Fun right now:/
#my art#felix and nika bonding over having the worst organ in the human body(uterus)(i HATE that bitch)#sorry this is kinda dumb but. yeah..#REALISTICALLY i feel like net would be grossed out by a situation like this but i can draw what i want!!! heheheh#so hes cool and supportive. cause i think that would be neat#uhhhhh actually ive been thinkin about net recently..#okay so hear me out- transfem net.#like........ the casual misoginy and shit being a product of net's weird love-hate relationship with feminity???#they want and crave it but always saw being a girl as 'playing w/ barbie dolls' and 'not understanding technology' and they dont want THAT#but they want to be called pretty and wear a dress sometimes?#so he just kinda represses all those weird complicated feelings and tries his best to be manly and strong and#Not Like Those Stupid Girls who are beyond his comprehension#and then maybe felix comes out as a trans guy and net decides to do some research on trans ppl and#actually starts to realise they relate to these people??#and it takes a LOT of time and introspection but she figures it out. eventually.#and shes still Net! she still scoffs at romantic musicals and is terminally online and a teenage genius and a snarky bitch-#but she also doesnt have to prove her masculinity to anyone. she doesnt have to put girls down for being girls and she#starts to appriciate them as people and not prizes to be won by boys#i dont know if this makes any sense whatsoever but...... i like this idea! i like net realising casual sexism Is Not Funny Actually#i like nika helping her figure things out and try diffrent things and see feminity as something fun and exciting#like i dont think net would suddenly start wearing all pink or something! shes just. herself.#and that means watching horror movies and saving the world from an evil a.i. and movie nights at felixs and hating to admit when shes wrong#yeah. something to think about i guess.#fnin#felix net i nika#sorry this propably makes no sense lol
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palanaeum · 2 years
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Unexpected side effects of being stealth while not having changed my legal name yet: my coworker jokingly telling me she's gonna call me by my deadname because she doesn't realize I'm trans, she just thinks I go by a different name for cisgender reasons
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thecindercrow · 2 years
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got my new candle in the mail
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polaraffect · 2 years
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this week on is it a side effect of testosterone or just season depression: my midterm essay for a class was due two days ago. i have not started it. normally i would feel anxiety about this but i feel distinctly numb about it.
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gingerswagfreckles · 8 months
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I think people need to understand that when someone says the situation in Israel/Palestine is complicated they are not necessarily saying that the discussion of who the oppressor vs oppressed is complicated. The Israeli government has been oppressing the Palestinians for a very long time, that is clear, and it is not complicated to understand that at least since the 80s they have had dramatically more financial and military power to keep control of the territory in the way they like.
However, it is reductive and dismissive to insist that there is no complexity in the potential ways to move forward to bring peace to the region. Despite what people on tumblr.edu like to believe, "Israel should never have been created" is not a practical solution to an incredibly heated geopolitical situation in the present day. Israel was created and it does exist. 10 million people live there. 74% of the population is native born and the country has existed for 75 years. Hand waving these fact away with the opinion that "they should move back to where they came from" may make you feel good about being a Radical Leftist, but it does not give anyone a road map for how exactly millions of people without dual citizenship are supposed to just up and evaporate. Nor does it acknowledge the reality that 21% of Israelis are Arabs, the very people you are claiming to want to give the land back to.
Insisting that there's nothing complicated about expecting an entire country's population to willingly dissappear with no consequences is not a productive way to think about this conflict. It ignores the many massive superpowers that have an interest in proping up different states in the region, the power dynamics involved in any land back movements, and the inevitably negative consequences of totally dissolving an established state without a plan. It is also completely and almost comically unrealistic, so much so that it makes it hard to believe that anyone who's opinion starts and ends with this idea really gives a shit about anyone who lives in the area as much as they care about their online leftist clout.
There's nothing complicated in understanding that the Israeli government is and has been maintaining an oppressive apartheid state for decades. It is, however, very complicated to come up with a realistic way to resolve some of the most intricately entangled land disputes on the planet without plunging the region into total chaos. Not everyone has to be deeply educated on every geopolitical situation, but it is very hard to take people seriously when they know nothing about the politics or history of a region and yet insist that there is nothing complicated about it at all.
There's a lot of people on this website who are getting dangerously smug about their own ignorance, and are starting to go down Qanon type anti-intellectual paths in the name of being sufficiently radical. Not knowing the details of a very convoluted land dispute isn't something to brag about online as you call for intentionally reductive solutions. You can support the Palestinian cause and be aware of the oppression they have faced while also holding off on calling people trying to do real analysis and de-escalation work bootlickers. We need to get control of the urge to fit every global issue into a simplistic YA novel narrative structure that appeals to Western revolutionary fantasies.
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byoldervine · 2 months
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Types Of Writer’s Block (And How To Fix Them)
1. High inspiration, low motivation. You have so many ideas to write, but you just don’t have the motivation to actually get them down, and even if you can make yourself start writing it you’ll often find yourself getting distracted or disengaged in favour of imagining everything playing out
Try just bullet pointing the ideas you have instead of writing them properly, especially if you won’t remember it afterwards if you don’t. At least you’ll have the ideas ready to use when you have the motivation later on
2. Low inspiration, high motivation. You’re all prepared, you’re so pumped to write, you open your document aaaaand… three hours later, that cursor is still blinking at the top of a blank page
RIP pantsers but this is where plotting wins out; refer back to your plans and figure out where to go from here. You can also use your bullet points from the last point if this is applicable
3. No inspiration, no motivation. You don’t have any ideas, you don’t feel like writing, all in all everything is just sucky when you think about it
Make a deal with yourself; usually when I’m feeling this way I can tell myself “Okay, just write anyway for ten minutes and after that, if you really want to stop, you can stop” and then once my ten minutes is up I’ve often found my flow. Just remember that, if you still don’t want to keep writing after your ten minutes is up, don’t keep writing anyway and break your deal - it’ll be harder to make deals with yourself in future if your brain knows you don’t honour them
4. Can’t bridge the gap. When you’re stuck on this one sentence/paragraph that you just don’t know how to progress through. Until you figure it out, productivity has slowed to a halt
Mark it up, bullet point what you want to happen here, then move on. A lot of people don’t know how to keep writing after skipping a part because they don’t know exactly what happened to lead up to this moment - but you have a general idea just like you do for everything else you’re writing, and that’s enough. Just keep it generic and know you can go back to edit later, at the same time as when you’re filling in the blank. It’ll give editing you a clear purpose, if nothing else
5. Perfectionism and self-doubt. You don’t think your writing is perfect first time, so you struggle to accept that it’s anything better than a total failure. Whether or not you’re aware of the fact that this is an unrealistic standard makes no difference
Perfection is stagnant. If you write the perfect story, which would require you to turn a good story into something objective rather than subjective, then after that you’d never write again, because nothing will ever meet that standard again. That or you would only ever write the same kind of stories over and over, never growing or developing as a writer. If you’re looking back on your writing and saying “This is so bad, I hate it”, that’s generally a good thing; it means you’ve grown and improved. Maybe your current writing isn’t bad, if just matched your skill level at the time, and since then you’re able to maintain a higher standard since you’ve learned more about your craft as time went on
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percheduphere · 6 months
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LET'S TALK ABOUT LOKI'S SHOES (ACTUALLY, HIS WHOLE WARDROBE)
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Production costs aside, clothes tell the audience about how characters think of themselves.
Loki's shoes in the S2 finale raised a lot eyebrows, but I find them quite fitting: they are comfortable, practical, and most importantly, they are humble. The camera brings this to our attention to communicate his evolution in character.
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Loki has always dressed well, often times ostentatiously. Whether he is at war, passing as a Midgardian, or held captive as an Asgardian prisoner, Loki communicates his social class and sense of superiority through clothing. For him, clothing armors his fragile sense of self and against others' opinions of him. He intends to be perceived as deadly charming but ultimately unapproachable.
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His attire in the first Thor movie is roughly equal parts green and gold, signifying his royal status. His style is dressed down for his brother's misadventures in Jotenheim, yet overall both silhouettes are lofty, princely, but not hardened or threatening.
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In Avengers, Loki's look has more black and leather, with exaggerated emphasis on his shoulders meant to intimidate as he assumes the role of villain. The silhouette is very hard, heavy, and edgy. Gold detailing is prevalent as well. Combined with the goat's helm, this is Loki's most pretentious outfit, which speaks to an undercurrent of low self-esteem and a compulsive need to impress. There's no mistaking he is the main antagonist of the story.
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In Thor 2, Loki's attire is similar to Avengers but the overcoat is exchanged for a less bulky version (perhaps conveying he is less guarded now that the effects of the Mind Stone are no longer influencing him). Loki's role likewise pivots from the harsh lines of a villain to the more flexible edges of a reluctant villain-turned-ally. This aligns with his character arc when he protects both Jane and Thor, seemingly sacrificing himself.
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In Thor 3, Loki's silhouette is streamlined even further. The overcoat is done away with in favor of what appears to be a leather doublet, pauldrons, and vambraces. Gold accents are minimal. While stylish, Loki's attire is more practical than showy, and his helm serves the dual purpose of protection as well as weaponry. At this point in his arc, Loki has become a full antihero, joining his brother's side in rescuing as many Asgardians as possible, and eventually dying in a vain bid to protect Thor from Thanos.
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The TVA does something very fun and interesting in taking away Loki's ability to dress himself. Since Loki cannot use his magic in the TVA, he is forced to wear the same clothing as his captor/advocate, who eventually becomes his best friend and peer.
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Perhaps, on a subconscious level, this helped Loki to feel included. We know by his pwn admission that Loki fears being alone and desperately craves a sense of belonging. At the same time, he intentionally dresses to put people at a distance, thereby protecting himself from potential rejection at the cost of isolating himself further.
When Mobius gives him that TVA jacket for the first time, Loki seems uncharacteristically pleased. It is not an attractive jacket by any means, yet he neither scoffs at it nor refuses to wear it. Instead, Loki puts it on and is content when Mobius says it looks "smart" on him. He continues to dress like Mobius and, indeed, mimic some of his mannerisms such as placing his hands on his hips. Without clothing meant to push people away, Loki opens up, has more fun, and makes friends.
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Loki's choice of attire as he assumes the mantle of God of Stories (and time) is fascinating. Setting aside the clear design inspiration from the comics, Loki's silhouette is soft, remarkably so. His colors are earthy hues of green, and the only bit of flare are the light gold trimming and crown. The look brings to mind the garb of sages and wise wizards rather than royalty or warriors. He's powerful yet approachable because there is humility in his bearing. And that humility springs from a well of healthy self-worth, self-love, and a deep love for others.
The shoes are not meant to be attractive. They are meant to help him ascend the throne, nothing more.
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mystigaron · 3 months
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IMPORTANT FINAL EDIT: THE PARTNERSHIP AND UPDATE PLANNED WITH IT HAVE BEEN INDEFINITELY SUSPENDED. i might delete this post within the next few days i'm still not 100% sure if i should or not especially since the information on it about ludeo is still relevant. however rain world has halted working with them and the update planned to implement the feature is not going ahead. thanks to everyone who spoke up and helped getting this out there and to the attention of the developers and akupara
i haven't seen this up until this morning and not all that many people within the rain world community seem to be talking about it but
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it's come to my attention that rain world has recently partnered with a company known as ludeo for the game's newest update. this was tucked away in the replies of their rain world art month post
ludeo is an israeli company run by two brothers based in tel-aviv. this is incredibly disappointing and fucked up to be doing during the on-going genocide israel is committing in palestine and the surrounding regions and i quite frankly do not care if it turns out this was just down to "poor research" and was an "accident": you can quite literally look up the two founders' names on linkedin and find out where they are based in under a minute. there are no excuses for this
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another point of note about ludeo that i find upsetting is that a lot if not all of the images used on the company's site to advertise this product are 99.9% guaranteed to be ai-generated
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while this is absolutely not the main issue at hand here as promoting your partnership with this company at this time is already fucked up enough to begin with, going and hiding this post within the replies of another promoting your art month event to the artists within this community is so astoundingly ironic and ignorant
i am not trying to suggest that there are alterior motives behind putting this post in the replies of another about a community event rather than making an entirely new and separate one dedicated exclusively to information about this update, but i do find it strange. i woke up to finding out about this and was absolutely livid, and while what's done is already done, i am hoping whoever was responsible for this knows how fucked it is to be promoting this company at this time, or just in general. i am not trying to start a witch hunt or start shit for the sake of starting shit, but i think this needs to be addressed and spoken about, as money towards israel is money towards more bloodshed and violence in palestine. this shit makes my blood fucking boil
edit: i feel like i should also put this here if this wasn't already terrible enough
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please continue sharing support for palestine. links below are sites and donation links that go directly towards supporting palestinian people in need
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