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#i love thinking about this au where qui-gon never found little ani
skyyworker · 1 year
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anakin staining his clothes with grease, some of it ends up in his hair, some of it on his cheeks.
anakin stuffing random objects in his mouth while he’s fixing a droid because he only has two hands but he needs the bolts and screwdrivers of different sizes within reach.
anakin spending most of his days back at the temple locked in his room tinkering with droid parts or in the hangar making... adjustments to his ship.
anakin falling asleep on his most recent project and obi-wan gently moving him into a more comfortable position before covering him with a blanket.
anakin bringing his little projects on missions because he wants to test them on the field and being put off when, at times, they get blown up in the heat of the moment.
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calltomuster · 3 years
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Star Wars Fic Recs Part the Fourth
[first fic rec list] [second fic rec list] [third fic rec list]
Been a few weeks since I've done one of these and I've read/reread some great fics recently so let me share them with you now!
And I Fear Nothing by @maiseey (Obi-Wan/Cody, WIP, 11/? chapters, 43.4k words) Picture this: I am sitting in the parking lot of my local grocery store, having just bought a load of perishables. I get the email that And I Fear Nothing has just been updated. What do I do: run home to preserve the food I just paid for, or sit in my car and read the new chapter right away? The answer is obvious, of course! That is exactly the situation I found myself in last week when chapter 11 dropped and I did in fact choose to read it in spite of my groceries, that's how much I love this fic. In this fic, Obi-Wan and Cody are raising Luke and Leia together on Tatooine, and they've got so much trauma, and new + old wounds, and love for each other and the children they're raising that it both warms your heart and tears it apart. But that's not all, this fic expands beyond just the small home in the middle of the Jundland Wastes and explores Ahsoka and Rex and their journey to de-chip as many clones as possible. I love this fic because it doesn't shy away from hard conversations, but it does it in a way that makes you want to cry and give everyone involved a hug. Plus, there are some fantastic minor clone characters that you will 100% want to die for by the time you finish reading. Cannot recommend this fic enough.
Obligate by @communistkenobi (gen, one-shot, 23.9k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin & Ahsoka) Just when you thought the Deception arc didn't have enough pain, this AU sees Anakin fake his death instead of Obi-Wan! My heart is physically ripped out of my chest just thinking about this fic, so imagine what it'd do to you actually reading it. Anything @communistkenobi writes is so well-done and I've gone through his works list on AO3 multiple times, but somehow I missed this when it was first posted and it was like a wonderfully delightful surprise when I ran into it the other day. So, so good. Highly recommend!
Moirai by damonkey (gen, WIP, 4/? chapters, 9.2k words, Obi-Wan & Qui-Gon) All I can really say about this fic without giving anything away is that it's a Phantom Menace AU and it's so intriguing. The author is very deliberate in having a vague summary and only tagging as the story progresses, so I truly have no idea what's ahead of me but it's so -- as I said -- intriguing that I'm happy to strap into the ride. Ahhhh I'm skimming through the fic and there are so many things I want to mention but I don't want to give anything away!
Almost Home by @frunbuns (gen, one-shot, 5.2k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) You know, every time I recc a Modern AU I'm like "I don't usually like Modern AUs but..." and then proceed to gush over the fic. I went and checked and I've recced a Modern AU on almost every fic rec list I've made! Maybe I do like Modern AUs?? Or maybe the fics are just that good -- and this fic is definitely that good. In this fic, the first of a planned series of fics set in a modern Star Wars universe, Obi-Wan is reeling from the loss of his adoptive father Qui-Gon and has to care for a young Anakin. Ooooooof. Definitely hits you right in the feels, this one. Love the non-chronological storytelling too!
Naked and Not Paid by biscuitlevitation (Obi-Wan/212th Attack Battalion, WIP, 6/? chapters, 14.9k words) This fic is essentially ~15k words of the clones thirsting over Obi-Wan and it is the funniest thing I have read all year. I'm not kidding, I just read the last chapter which features space-church-lady!Anakin and I laughed so hard I cried. I'm cracking up just thinking about it. I promise you will have a good time reading this fic. And if the tag "Obi-Wan Kenobi/212th Attack Battalion" puts you off, let me just say there's no sex in this at all, it's just thirst. And it's hilarious.
Full Disclosure by @trixree (Obi-Wan/Cody, WIP, 2/3 chapters, 7.4k words) ROTS AU in which the Force bonds Obi-Wan has formed with a few members of the 212th save them from the chip and Order 66, but it doesn't stop the devastation from happening on a mass scale and they all have to try and deal with Mustafar and Luke and Leia. This fic manages to be both extremely soft and extremely gut-wrenching at the same time, and I wish I could leave more kudos. Full disclosure (get it, little pun there for ya), I will be dying until the final chapter comes out. Time to go listen to Olivia Rodrigo and reread this fic and just live in my feels.
Thirteen Days by @ewanmcgregorismyhomeboy12 (gen, one-shot, 4.1k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) Post-Zygerria arc, Anakin dresses an unconscious Obi-Wan's injuries and struggles. Ahhhh this fic is one of my favorite Zygerria arc fics, and given that that's my favorite arc, that's saying a lot! Obi-Wan doesn't say a word in this fic, but his presence is very much there, if you know what I mean. And the descriptions of injuries here are pretty graphic at times, but it's so good that you'll want to keep reading even if you have to do it through the fingers covering your eyes.
brother, let me be your shelter by @kenobilovebot (gen, one-shot, 1.6k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) This fic packs so much tenderness in a short amount of words. It covers an AU in which Obi-Wan's issues from Zigoola never really resolve, and Anakin finds out when -- well, you'll just have to read for yourself. I love Zigoola because it is such an excellent whumpfest for poor Obi-Wan and this fic is great for that, but also highlights Anakin and Obi-Wan's relationship.
A Padawan At War (Again) series by @itstimeforstarwars (gen, 3 parts, 100k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) In this series, Obi-Wan and Anakin are transported from The Phantom Menace into the Clone Wars and have to deal with all that comes with it: fighting wars, discovering a Padawan you never knew you had, dueling your grandmaster who apparently is a Sith Lord now(?!) and all the rest. This series is a great ride, and I look forward to every update. Note: the first fic in this series is a one-shot that was expanded upon, and it drops you in media res. The second fic is a prequel that shows how they got to that point, and the third fic is the sequel that shows what comes after.
The Desert Storm series by @blue-sunshine-mauve-morning (complete, 24 parts, 1.144 million words) There has never been a better time to start reading this series. If you read Star Wars fics on AO3, then you've definitely seen the Desert Storm series before, but maybe you were daunted by the high word count, or felt like it would be too much effort to go all the way to the beginning of a series but couldn't just jump in halfway. Let me tell you, it's 100% worth it, and now is the perfect time to read this series if you haven't already. This series is complete, but it turns out it's all just Act 1 of the larger story, which will continue in the Rise and Fall series. @blue-sunshine-mauve-morning is taking a break right now before starting the next series, so you have ample time to get caught up, and YOU REALLY SHOULD. Let me tell you, this series had me on the edge of my seat more than any other piece of media I can remember. With the most recent chapters, where everything that has been building for a million words came to a head, I would get so worked up after each chapter that beforehand I would have to queue up calming things to watch afterwards, and it still wouldn't be enough and I'd be too full of feelings to get anything done the rest of the day. Seriously, this series is amazing. And if you HAVE read it before but haven't reread, now is the perfect time for that as well. I've reread this series multiple times and it's so rewarding because the author sprinkled in so many hints as to what will come that you only understand the second (or third) time around. I know I've written a lot for this rec but this is a long series and it deserves it. Go read! Now!
If you like any of these fics, please consider reblogging so they can get more exposure! And if you noticed I missed someone’s Tumblr account, or linked the wrong one, please let me know!
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padawansuggest · 3 years
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AU where Anakin and Obi-Wan are part of a small ‘species’ of people touched by the force that leads to usually, wings (in a few cases, tails if they live by oceans, sometimes claws, a few of them can change what it represents as but not Ani and Obi, they aren’t the strongest of their people) that look ethereal and shimmering. Some of them just glow full bodied and float like The Daughter at Mortis, so it’s based off canon don’t worry, but things like that.
It’s not so much a species, as what happens when the force touches down on infants. There are a bunch of fics out there based off the idea but most of them have something to do with Kyber, but I think that’s missing out of what could happen in so many ways. Because, Kyber happening on a planet makes sense to me. Because planets have rocks, force plus planet makes Kyber. I think it would be interesting if force plus sentient equals the ability to shape the force around you into what will suit your body the best. Like wings. Anakin and Shmi and Obi-Wan have wings. Fey (another force blessed from the main temple) just glows like a star and floats about lmao.
The force blessed have a planet they call their own, but not all of them live there cause not all of them grew up there. Shmi lives there now, Fey follows the will of the force and was knighted to be trained to help others. Anakin went with the Jedi because he knew it was his destiny to be trained by Obi-Wan. They’re important together. Obi-Wan is with the Jedi cause he was orphaned and trafficked off the planet, Qui-Gon found him, bonded with the baby on the month long trek back to the temple, and after that they knew he would be the boy’s master one day. It was also important. Also Qui-Gon survives. And Xanatos was so entranced by his future baby brother that he never fell to the dark side.
Anyways. All this to say, one day, Anakin is just doing his work in Watto’s shop, like normal, and the most beautiful being in the universe walks in, so he asks her, ‘are you an Angel?’ And of course, Padme, who’s being faced with yet ANOTHER little winged creature, is all ‘me??? Shouldn’t I be asking if YOU’RE an Angel??’ And that’s how they fell in love lmao.
Also sometimes Ani and Obi go to the force touched homeworld (I’ll come up with names later idk) and are always invited to court by the planet ruler (it’s not that Jedi are so much more respected, but they have so many interesting stories!!!) and so it’s one of the only times Obi genuinely likes holding court with royalty, because they’re gawking at his stories and not their wings the whole time. It’s kinda sweet. When he was a kid, Qui-Gon would take him there and Obi-Wan would get fussed over the whole time by concerned mothers who think he’s too skinny while Qui-Gon just basked in the deep pool of force that surrounded them all.
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to love is the greatest gift
2. the dinner
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pairing: obi wan kenobi x f!reader (past!din djarin x reader | past!obi wan kenobi x satine kryze) characters: f!reader, anakin amidala-skywalker, padmé amidala-skywalker, mentiones of din djarin, obi wan kenobi, others word count: 3.6k+ warnings: angst, fluff, death, longing, some arguing, slow burn summary: au! It has never been the right timing for you and Obi Wan, but maybe this time will be different. a/n: thank you so much for all the love in the previous chapter! i was so overwhelmed that i was a little nervous posting this part ;w; i really hope you guys enjoy this story! and do let me know what you think of the current formatting. is the switch from past to present jarring? or is it okay?
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Then.
The heat that Summer brought to Coruscant was different than Tatooine’s, less harsh and dry, and more of a kiss of warmth on your skin. Mother did say that Tatooine was always more temperamental, quick to heat up; while Coruscant could be a little tepid sometimes, but always a lot of fun. 
That was probably the only nice thing about Coruscant. Everything else about the city—like their streets—were too confusing.
Following the directions on your phone, you pulled the straps of your backpack tighter with your unoccupied hand, eyebrows furrowed as you tried to read the map on your phone. Was this truly the place you were meant to meet your guide? 
You looked up at the quaint house in front of you, quite a ways away from downtown and more in the suburbs. It looked like a cottage, like the ones in home magazines your mother liked collecting or the ones in Naboo or Stewjon. Could a high schooler, even one able to attend a prestigious private school, be able to afford such a home?
Did the headmistress confuse the address? Seemed possible. The woman seemed to be much more interested in the absolutes of rules and manners than actually helping you find your guide. Maybe you should have accepted your mother’s offer to accompany you. Or maybe convinced your parents to let you come with Anakin, you were sure Shmi wouldn't have minded.
You stood on your tiptoes, trying to take a peak over the white fence covered in a fuchsia flower—bougainvillea, if you remembered correctly. When that didn’t work, you stuffed your phone into your pocket and with hands holding onto your backpack straps to not jostle your belongings around too much, you began to jump.
There was a sound, like the sound of metal clinking and wood screeching, and the gate opened to a boy? man? (too young to own a house and maybe a few years older than you). He stepped out, blue eyes stopping on your curious form and greeting you with an amused, “Hello, there.”
You knew he had seen you jumping, there was no way he wouldn’t be looking at you the way he was if he hadn’t—embarrassing.
“Hello,” you greeted him back, timid and quickly setting your feet flat on the ground.
“May I help you?” he asked you, his Coruscanti accent thicker than the ones that greeted you at the terminal, much more charming too. It reminds you of all the actors you’ve seen on screen, speaking clearly and with nuance—never faltering. “You seem to be quite lost.”
“Oh, yes, I’m looking for someone,” you found yourself saying, tone turning formal and stiff. He removed his flat cap to push wisps of auburn hair away from his eyes, nodding for you to continue when you paused. “Padmé Amidala, is her name. She’s supposed to be my guide?”
At the mention of Padmé, the kind stranger sighed, hands falling to his hip. “Ah, now I understand why she came over. Did father know?” he murmured under his breath, looking back at the house with a raised brow. “Give me a moment and I’ll fetch her for you.”
You nodded quietly, watching him turn back inside, but not even two steps in, he stopped and turned back around, flashing you an almost sheepish, but albeit charming smile. 
“Pardon, that was a bit rude of me. Would you like to come in and wait for her in the garden?”
You mulled it over—following a stranger into their home was always something you had been advised against since you were a child. It would be completely unwise, wouldn’t it? But he seemed too kind, eyes too innocent and earnest to hurt you. And so, against your usual better judgement, you nodded. “If it’s no trouble?”
“None at all,” he assured you, opening the gate wider, “please come in. I’m Obi Wan, an old friend of Padme’s.”
You gave him your name and he smiled at you, wide and completely beautiful. “A pleasure to meet you.”
Now.
You were only a girl back when you first met, immature and blossoming and he was a young man, all roses and maturity—too much like his father (and yet nothing like him)—it was never going to be the right time for you.
Even now, standing before you—him with his tidy, combed auburn hair, white, stupid shirt that is freshly pressed, and brown slacks and dress shoes that are anything but casual—you feel like that girl all over again. 
“It has been a long time, Obi Wan.” Obi Wan. Obi. Obi. It’s been so long since you’ve said his name aloud that it feels so foreign on your tongue now. “I—I didn’t know you were visiting.”
His eyebrows furrow, deep, cerulean pools gliding away to the white door only a few steps away. His nostrils flare with a breath and turns his gaze back to you, opening his mouth to say something—he doesn’t get the chance. 
“There you are! You said—oh,” It’s Padmé. Beautiful, sweet Padmé looking as lost and confused to see Obi Wan just at the entrance of her driveway, with you. “Obi Wan?”
“Hello, old friend.” His head is slanted towards her now, a soft smile on his face. “It has been some time.” 
Friend. There’s always been that distinction between you and her in his words and actions. She was and is friend or little sister, and you were and have not always been darling—that always something, but never just nothing. 
“Yes, it has,” she says, unable to change her expression, and you don’t blame her. You still can’t believe it either.
Did Anakin know?
“Honey, where is—“
Of course Anakin knows, how could he not know? Look at his stupid face peeking over Padmé’s shoulder like the kriffing embecile he is! Those wide blue eyes don’t fool you, not one bit!
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Dinner is quiet for the most part. 
The twins are unsure of the newcomer, even though Padmé and Anakin keep reassuring them that he’s a friend, their godfather (something they are aware of thanks to the pictures of the six of you sitting on the mantle of their fireplace). The twins were only a year old when he returned the first time and around three years old when he left the second time. They have no attachment to the man sitting at the head of the table. 
They absolutely refuse to sit next to him—Obi Wan smiles, but there’s a flash of pain in his eyes at hearing their quiet reluctance and rejection to get to know him—and so, you and Anakin take the seat closest to him and across from one another. Leia by his side and Luke by yours. Padmé takes the other head, smiling placidly, but her brown eyes waver when they meet yours every time.
Utensils scrape against ceramic, Obi Wan occasionally asking questions—how have you been? how’s work? how’s school? did Mr. Ford finally move? Quinlan still touring? Mr. Windu still teaching at the school?
It’s Anakin that mostly answers for all of you, trying to keep dinner as lively as it usually is, but with the kids eating silently by your side and not falling for their dad’s bait, it falls flat.
This dinner was supposed to be full of discussion—who will be joining us? will I need to buy more bread? did the know Qui Gon? does it matter? coffee for how many people, again? But you can’t bring any of them up in fear of how Obi Wan would react, and quite honestly, you think it might be because you don’t know how to react to his presence, yet.
Your heart squeezes in your chest every time you glance at him and find him looking back at you, a longing to reach out and take him into your arms edging ever so slightly forward every time. But there’s also a part of you that wants to keep him at a distance, to not give him the ability to hurt you when he inevitably leaves again. And that latter part of you is probably the reason why you blurt a question you should’ve kept to yourself.
“Why are you back?” Anakin trails off, his voice lowering when yours suddenly cuts through his. Obi Wan’s eyes widen and his mouth hangs open slightly and you realize your question comes off more accusatory than you meant it to sound. “I—I mean, it’s just so sudden and—“
“I know,” Obi Wan interrupts, soft; understanding. “I wasn’t sure I should come back,” he admits, remorse floating around his words (whether for having felt that way or because he knows it’ll hurt you, you don’t know) and you quickly face forward, meeting Anakin’s hurt eyes that most likely mirror yours, “but the firm has offered me a promotion and Anakin managed to convince me to test it out.”
You release a shuddering sigh, you had a feeling he knew.
Now it’s Anakin’s turn to quickly look away from you (you can’t help but wonder if he saw the hint of betrayal beginning to bubble in the pit of your stomach), only to be trapped by his lovely wife’s. Once more, he breaks contact and stares down at the plate in front of him instead.
“I’m sorry,” Obi Wan starts after a brief tense silence, “if I had known you weren’t aware I wouldn’t have—“
“We’re glad you’re back, Obi Wan,” Padmé interjects, a soft, lovely smile on her face—always so good with people, “for however long you wish to stay.” Although you know she means it, there’s still some hesitation in her words as her gaze flickers between you and him.
“Yes,” you find yourself saying, somehow managing to keep your voice leveled through it, “we’re glad you’re back.” And just like Padme, you know you mean it too, even if there’s a hint of hesitation in the way your eyes won’t meet Obi Wan’s gaze as you say it, focusing instead on the bridge of his nose.
You think he knows it too with the way his hands resting on the table roll inward, an uncomfortable veil beginning to fester as he keeps quiet, eyes drooping and the corner of his lips pulling down.
“Auntie,” Leia whispers, breaking the tension, from across the table and you hum, turning to face her with a wavering smile, “may I please have your piece of roast if you’re not going to eat it? It’s getting cold.”
You blink, and you’re sure everyone else is just as surprised as you are by her words—it’s such a little Leia thing to say, but at this moment? None of you were expecting it, and so, when you erupt into laughter, the room does too, the shock wearing off.
Leia looks around at the adults and she and Luke share a look before shrugging. She murmurs about roasts and perfectly good meat, and you shake your head as your laughter begins to die down.
“You can have it, honey.”
“Sweet!” Her eyes brighten and she grins, immediately digging into the piece of roast you’ve set on her plate.
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“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” Anakin whispers into the quiet space between you; the two of you staring out into the living room from the kitchen, leaning back onto the island.
It doesn’t surprise you that Obi Wan somehow manages to get the twins to warm up to him—Leia on his right and Luke on his left, the scrapbook you gifted them last year filled with Polaroid pictures of constellations opened on Obi Wan’s lap. He’s always been particularly good with kids, a trait he must’ve inherited from Gui Gon, who had an immense patience for teaching little ones how to play the piano and guitar.
Padmé sits with them too, keeping their attention away from you and Anakin and the inevitable arguing that might occur.
“This is Cetus!” you hear Luke point out.
“It’s our favorite ‘cause it’s a sea monster!” Leia informs him giddily, leaning forward to trace the stars to form the shape. “And this is And—Andromeda! It’s our Auntie’s favorite.”
“Is that right? It happens to be my favorite too.” Obi Wan glances over his shoulder, his eyes meeting yours for a split second—and you refuse to unravel the mess of emotions swirling in your stomach from that simple glance—before returning his attention back to the eager children, voice lilting. “Which one is this one?”
“It doesn’t matter anymore.” You cup your cheek, the other holding your elbow to keep it perched—but it does matter. It very much matters that Anakin knew and kept it from you, blindsiding you completely. If you had known—if you had known you wouldn’t have come. You could’ve mentally prepared yourself for his reappearance in your lives. But instead you got punched in the gut. “He’s here now.” 
“I wanted to tell you,” he rushes to admit. “But I—when he told me he would visit—try out that new job, I didn’t think he actually would.” Anakin crosses his arms over his chest, eyes downcast and focused on his crossed ankles. “He’s done this before, you know?”
Your head snaps in his direction—this is the first you’ve ever heard about it.
“Once after your 21st birthday and another after Din and you broke up.” Anakin lets out a frustrated sigh and the hand that had been cupping your cheeks curls into a tight fist. “I wanted to surprise you, so I didn’t tell you. But he always called the night before to say he couldn’t make it. Some surprise, huh?”
“Anakin…” 
“I thought—I don’t know what I thought, to be honest.” He laughed self-deprecatingly and you squeeze his forearm. “I just hoped he would. I’m sorry”
“I’ll get over it, Ani,” you promise him, soft, the hurt and betrayal you felt dissipating like wisps of smoke. “I understand why you didn’t tell me.” He tries to smile at you, but fails. “I’m glad he’s back, really, I meant it when I said it… but—“
“It hurts,” he finishes for you, sympathy and understanding laced in those two words.
“Always.”
“Do you know which one is this one Uncl’Obi?” Leia asks.
“Mama, knows it,” Luke follows.
“Does she? Care to give me a hint?”
“That'd be cheating.” Padmé laughs.
“No cheaters here,” Leia agrees, nodding her head with each word.
“Oh, fine. Let’s see…” Obi Wan chuckles, his hand coming up to his chin to rub the growing stubble, exaggerating his thinking. “Is it… a Bantha?” The kids giggle and shake their heads. “No? Hm. Then… is it… ah! I know—Pegasus?”
“Yes!”
You fight back a smile, pressing your lips together as the twins begin to tell him the story of Pegasus, not telling it correctly, but Obi Wan is enraptured by their animated story telling nonetheless. 
“We have to tell him,” Anakin whispers, breaking the silence, and while he doesn’t reference who has to know and what they have to know, you know exactly what he’s insinuating and you don’t agree.
“No.”
He exasperates your name, hands falling to his side as he fully turns to you. “He deserves—“
“I said no, Anakin,” you spit, breath coming out harshly. His blue eyes widen and they flash with hurt. You close your eyes, steadying your breath and calming your racing heart—cursing yourself. “He doesn’t need to know,” you repeat, softer this time. “He’s not going to stay long enough for it and even if he were, he’ll want nothing to do with it.”
“You do know best.” Anakin’s eyes have always been much more expressive than yours or Padmé’s or even Obi Wan’s—always giving away how he truly feels even though his mouth and the words that come out of it say otherwise.
“That’s—Anakin. That’s not fair. Remember last time we tried telling him when—“
“Satine had just passed away,” Anakin iterates, eyes softening when your eyes begin to well up—you swallow harshly. “It was still so fresh in his mind that he couldn’t think of honoring—“ He sighs, stopping himself from saying Qui Gon’s name. “Maybe now will be different.”
His eyes, as soft as they are, challenge you, refusing to crumble under your glare, they’re asking you to give in, to please, tell him. You shouldn’t give in, for your sake and Obi Wan’s, but the longer he looks at you with those eyes of his, you let out a reluctant sigh. “Okay.” You move away from the kitchen’s island and head towards the archway leading to the living room. “But you tell him. I have to get going.”
“I can do that.” You look back at him and find him smiling at you, thankful and relieved. You return it, albeit weakly, but he appreciates the effort. “We’ll talk about preparations another day, okay?”
You’ll probably have to talk about more than preparations later, but you don’t tell him that; instead, you nod and exit the kitchen.
Padmé, noticing your return, turns to you and studies you carefully. “Everything okay?”
Obi Wan also turns to look at you—the children’s current story falling on deaf ears—but you keep your gaze on Padmé.
“Yeah, everything’s fine,” you assure her, “but I have to head out.”
The twins hear that and immediately a chorus of “aww” and “why, Auntie?”, “can’t you stay?”, “sleepover!” begin to take over—their words wrestling over one another to be heard and you laugh, crouching down and opening your arms wide for them to run into. They do without hesitation, practically climbing over Obi Wan and Padmé to do so.
“I’m sorry, my little stars, I have to get up early for work tomorrow.” Pulling away from their little arms, you hold your pinkies out for them. “Next time I come over, we’ll have a movie night. Deal?”
“Deal!” They readily agree, hooking their pinkies with yours.
“And you’ll bring Uncle Din and Baby?” Luke whispers, low enough for only you and Leia to hear.
“Promise,” you whisper back.
Shaking their pinkies one last time, you stand up and begin your goodbyes, hugging Padmé tightly.
“Call me when you get home safely, okay?” she says, warmth in her words. 
“I will.” You linger in her arms longer than necessary, your heart beating in your chest harshly and rapidly, hesitant and afraid of saying goodbye to Obi Wan. But you finally pull away, you can’t be rude and leave him hanging. 
“May I… walk you to your car?” Obi Wan asks you, blue eyes wavering ever so slight my when you meet his gaze head on. 
A part of you wants to say no, but an even bigger part of you—the part that completely and utterly missed him—convinces you to agree. “I’d appreciate it.”
Anakin’s eyebrows furrow as he hands you your jacket and purse, and you smile at him, telling him it’s all right. It’s really not, you’d rather be able to breath for a moment and then think about Obi Wan later, but it’s too late now.
Obi Wan says something to the family of four as you slip on your jacket—“I’ll be back,” you assume. He grabs his own jacket from the coat rack and zips himself up, following after you as you walk out into the evening’s cold air.
“Did you park very far?” he asks you and you shake your head, walking down the stone path Anakin and Padmé installed earlier this year.
“Just down there.”
“Oh.”
“Yes.”
It’s a quiet walk, not an uncomfortable one, but you can’t say it’s comfortable either—it just is? Like many things just are. Will it always be like this now?
You hope not, because this quietness is not you and Obi Wan.
“This is it.” You step to the side of the driver, pressing the unlock button once and open the door. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome, my dear.” Obi Wan moves to close the door for you, but you don’t move to sit and he just stands there in front of you, holding your door. “I wish you a Goodnight and—and I’m glad I got to see you.”
Goodbye, Obi Wan. The words catch in your throat, your mouth parted, waiting for the words to escape, but you can’t bring yourself to say goodbye—what if this is the last time I see you, again?
“Darling?”
Your eyes find his even in the low lighting of the street—blue eyes shining brighter than the celestial sea. There are permanent lines around his eyes now—little crow feet that weren’t there last time he stood in front of you—and you reach for them with shaky hands and he closes his eyes when your thumb runs over them—gentle and tender, caressing.
He delicately hold your wrists, his thumbs running over your pulse, soothing and all too caring—thump. thUMP. THUmp. steady. familiar. alive.
It’s too much. It’s too much that you can’t help the welling of tears or the way your throat croaks when you call his name. 
Blue eyes re-emerge, red rimmed and devastating and it takes you only a second—a second of bright stars and flashing satellites, and airplanes landing—for you to collide against each other—faces hiding in hair and shoulder—wet words murmured over each other and tangling in vines so deep like the flowers that once grew on a beautiful white fence—hands wrapped tightly around each other.
“I’m so sorry, darling. I’m so sorry.” “I’ve missed you, I’ve missed you so much.” “Please don’t let go.” “I will never let you go. Never again.”
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You stare up at the house, well kept and pristine. The roses, however, are dying, their season soon to be over. But even in their last moments, they cling to their own beauty just for a little while longer.
“Resilient little things,” Qui Gon used to say. “Just like the heart. We tend to forget it’s a delicate thing, prone to hurting and breaking—even wilting, but much stronger than we give it credit.”
With the lingering warmth of Obi Wan’s arms and words encasing you, you turn back around and get in your car, driving away from the place that has been your home for the last few years.
Hopefully, Din will take you in for the night.
next
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the-obiwan-for-me · 3 years
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firstly, congrats on finishing She Said the Word!!! I've enjoyed it from start to finish and I've been reading it since almost the very beginning so it's been super fun to see it come to an end!!! Would you ever consider writing that "emotional" obi-wan and satine reunion after their respective stints in jail?? I can't find it at the moment but I feel like I remember you writing something about that??? :eyes emoji: anyway!! just thought I'd ask :)) hope you have a great day!!!
Thank you for this inspiration! And sorry it took a bit of time. I definitely had wanted to include this scene in the story itself, but sometimes you have to leave stuff out for the sake of pacing and mood. So, essentially, it’s a “deleted scene” (even if I wrote it after the fact).
If anyone else wants to offer up a prompt, either from this AU or one more aligning with canon, just send it my way! I will admit, I am not always fabulous with prompts, but if I think I can wrangle it, I will.
This contains spoilers up through chapter 65, Aftermath, of “She Said the Word,” so I will put the story below the break. Hope you enjoy!
Home
Any other time, it would seem like a fairly normal visit, Satine thought as she was bustled through the Senate building, surrounded by Coruscanti Guard. But this time the guards weren’t protecting her; they were guarding her, like some criminal mastermind or fearsome warlord.
In a strange way, Satine thought wryly to herself, she supposed she was some sort of warlord now.
 Beside Satine rushed her longtime aide, Kayla, who had finally bullied her way onto a transport from Mandalore, bringing with her endless apologies on Lily getting away from her, clothes appropriate for the family to wear in the Senate, and news from home, which she now hurriedly half whispered to Satine in an odd mix of Mando'a dialects in case of eavesdroppers. The petite woman had more than made up for Lily's escape, though Satine hardly blamed her for the girl's delinquency. Somehow, through sheer force of determination and grit, Kayla had kept the government from imploding or following its duchess and Mand'alor into a foolhardy rescue attempt. 
The troopers stopped at a door, and Satine had to reach out and grab Kayla's arm to keep her from running straight into the trooper, distracted as she was as she shared nearly two weeks' worth of news and relayed, from memory, messages from clan leaders and house heads. 
The door slid open, and troopers moved to allow Satine to pass. Kayla went to follow, but was stopped. "Prisoners only."
Kayla pushed against the soldier. "But I need to speak with the Duchess. I have more news to-" 
"Prisoners only," he said again, stepping more solidly in her path. She looked up at Satine, who had stopped beside her.
"Your grace…"
"It will be alright, Kayla. You have done good work thus far, and I have no doubt you will continue to do so." She squeezed the woman's hand when she saw her eyes well with tears. "K'oyacyi, my dear friend. Mandalore will persevere. We will persevere."
Kayla pressed her lips together, clearly willing herself from letting her tears fall. She squeezed Satine's hand then bowed her head. "Yes, your grace. Oya manda," she whispered, then stepped back, letting the party cross the threshold into the room beyond.
Satine crossed through the antechamber of the conference room turned holding cell and stopped short in the archway, relief sweeping over her at the sight in front of her. Korkie and Ahsoka sat in a corner, heads close together, speaking in hushed tones, while Anakin stood near the floor to ceiling window, speaking with Fenn Rau, Greer Eldar, and Ursa Wren. At the expansive table sat Obi-Wan, methodically fixing tea for he and Lily, who sat beside him, watching him work.
At some point in her relationship with Qui-Gon Jinn, probably on one of her many heartsick nights, her mind clouded and stormy with grief and uncertainty, he had set about making them all tea, in his quiet, methodical way. He offhandedly mentioned that making tea could almost be a form of meditation. She knew Obi-Wan often thought about that, as did she. She wondered, as their daughter watched him carefully, if he had told her the same thing, to ease her fragile heart and still her frantic mind.
Satine watched them all quietly for a long moment, everyone too caught up in their own worries to notice her. That was fine. She wanted to take them all in for a heartbeat; her beautiful, strong children and her kind, brave husband. She just needed that beat to drink them in before the world crashed back down around her and she had to remember they were criminals in the mind of the Republic.
The moment paused for her, just enough, and then ended when Obi-Wan happened to glance up and caught sight of her standing there. His face passed from quiet contemplation to delighted surprise to joyous relief, and he leapt from his seat, bounding across the distance between them, and swept her into his arms. For the first time in over ten days, Satine felt like she was home. Though they were hundreds of lightyears from their physical home, locked in a conference room, treated like war criminals and treacherous beasts, this man was the living embodiment of home.
“Stars, Satine,” he breathed into her hair, and she was caught by the silly thought that she was glad Kayla had been unable to fit her normal headdress within her tight packing guidelines. “Master Windu told me time and time again that you were alright, but I’m just so glad to see it for myself.”
His arms were warm and strong, and she wished for him never to let go. She buried her head into the crook of his neck more, breathing deep. His skin smelled of the same industrial soap she had used to shower in the detention center, but the tunic Kayla had seen to him getting still held traces of the subtle warm scent of his preferred cologne. He smelled like home. 
She tried to speak, but found that no words would come, only a quiet sob of relief and fear and uncertainty that she hadn’t known she had been holding for days. “You are alright, aren’t you?” he whispered into her ear when her body trembled against him with the silent sob.
She didn’t trust her voice, so she merely nodded against his shoulder. “Good,” he said again, tightening his hold on her, rocking her gently. In turn, she wrapped her arms about his neck, holding onto him as if he could float away at any moment. 
She wasn't sure how much time passed as they stood like that, gently swaying, but he stirred her back to the present when he finally spoke again. "Everything will work out, my love. Be brave. Yes?"
She nodded against him again. "Yes," she agreed, finally managing to find her voice. She allowed herself to pull loose of his embrace, and found Lily standing beside her. She pulled the girl into her arms, hugging her tight, kissing the top of her head. "Are you well, little warrior?" she asked. Lily nodded, sinking into Satine's embrace.
"I missed you," Lily said. 
"And I missed you. But now we're together again." 
"All of us."
Satine looked up to find the other three had come over. She opened her arms and they entered the circle of her arms, trapping Lily against her. She hugged them all as best she could, her little warrior, her kind little jetii girl, and her two big Mando'ade boys. It wasn't just Obi-Wan who was home. This was home. These children. Her husband. Their love. This was her safe harbor. Her rest. Her joy.
Obi-Wan approached, and she felt the soothing weight of his warm hand against her back. "We must all be brave, now," he said softly. "There will be those who will see us fall, but we must be strong against them. Trust in the Force, my darlings. We will see this through."
Someone cleared their throat behind them, and Satine reluctantly let her children go. She turned, hand reaching out for Obi-Wan's and finding it, to find Bail Organa waiting, Padme brushing past him to come to Anakin. 
"It is time, my friends," he said, his voice somber. 
"Thank you, Bail," Obi-Wan said, straightening his back, as if preparing for a battle. Satine supposed that this was just one more battle for them. He looped her hand in the crook of his elbow, and went to lead their family toward the door, when Lily stopped them. 
Reaching up, the girl pushed a loose pin back into Satine's hair, trapping a wayward curl back where it belonged. She smoothed her hand across Satine's hair.
"That's better. Now you're ready," Lily said quietly, smiling softly. Satine kissed the top of her girl's forehead, running her hand through her long hair, left loose and brushed smooth by Padme. 
"Thank you, verd'ika. Now I am ready for anything."
With that, she allowed Obi-Wan to lead her out, holding her head high, ready to fight for her home.
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hotpinkrathian · 4 years
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Kyalin Week Day 6
Prompt Chosen- Modern AU
Now, I know people are tired of hearing about the pandemic, however when I saw Modern Au as an option on there I just had to write Kyalin during quarantine... it was too tempting.
"We have to quarantine at home for two weeks, its mandatory." Kya explained.
"I want even at the hospital, how could I have gotten it?"
"Because I was at the hospital, I could have it, and spread it to you." Lin crossed her arms, releasing a dramatic groan.
"Come on Lin, I know it's not ideal, and I'm sorry, but look on the bright side. We get two weeks off, just the two of us. We could, you know, try that thing you mentioned the other night."
"That was you who mentioned that."
"Well you didn't shoot it down, so its both our ideas now." Lin sighed, pursing her lips and Kya wrapped her in a hug.
"Alright, but as soon as my two weeks are up I'm going back to work."
"Of course." Kya kissed her on the cheek, watching as Lin disappeared into the bedroom. Her eyes panned the apartment, it looked like it could use a clean, so she got to work.
"What are we going to do for food?" Lin asked, staring into the empty fridge.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, Kya, we have no food in here." Kya came up behind her, placing her chin in the nook of her neck, frowning at the sight of the fridge light that illuminated nothing but the shelves.
"We eat out too much. I can call Tenzin maybe he can bring us some supplies."
"No, Tenznin will bring us a very selective diet and If I'm going to be in here for two weeks then I need real food. You know Kya, these abs don't feed themselves." Kya raised an eyebrow, moments away from kissing Lin, when the earthbender pulled out her phone.
"Mako? Okay... okay... look, I'm out for two weeks. Try not to start a gang war while I'm gone. I need you to do something for me."
"Tell him to get KitKat!" Kya said, Lin raised a finger, telling Mako to get a pen and paper.
"You ready?" Lin asked him, and began to fill him in on their grocery desires.
"Pretzels too! I could use pretzels right about now..." Lin added pretzels to list of demands. Finally when they were satisfied with the list, they hung up the phone.
"He says he'll be around in an hour. He went to get Asami because he's never gotten groceries on this scale before."
"Smart."  Kya smiled up at Lin, who was checking her phone. "So..." Kya said, drumming her fingers on the counter, "what should we do for an hour?" Lin looked up, putting her phone face down on the counter.
"Well you're practically undressing me with your eyes."
"Am not!"
"Oh yeah?. What color bra do I have.on today?" Kya pursed her lips, thinking.
"White."
"Wrong, black."
"What? No.I remember this morning you-" she stopped as Lin pulled open her flannel, revealing the black bra she was indeed wearing.
"You tricked me." Lin smirked, walking around the counter and planting a kiss on Kya's lips.
"I have some paperwork to get done, call me when Mako gets here." Lin smirked as she walked off, and Kya glared at her, running her tongue over her teeth. Thinking about how there's no one else she'd rather be quarantined with.
Mako knocked, letting them know their things were outside their door, as per standard, they waited until the two kids had left before picking up their things, Lin put four bags on her arms, gesturing for Kya to take the remaining two. She put the stuff on the counter, and watched as Kya took the time to wipe everything with Lysol.
"Kya," Lin said seriously, "are you worried at all? About this whole thing?"
"Like being quarantined? No not all."
"No, not that, I mean more like the pandemic in general."
"Oh. I haven't really thought about it, but yeah, I guess I am. I'm worried about mom, I know she's safe as she could be in the south pole, but this isn't how I want her to go. Are you worried about Toph?"
"Are you kidding me? The woman couldn't die if she tried!" They laughed, and Lin put her hands behind her, gripping the edge of the counter. "In all serious, I'm more worried about the people, the news says the unemployment rate has sky rocketed in the last few days."
"Lin?" Kya asked, putting the wipes down. "We're good right? Financially?"
"Oh dear, of course. I've been working for thirty years, saved up as much as I could not to mention my share of the Beifong fortune... its not me I worry about."
"Mako?"
"Yeah."
"He'll be alright, we won't let anything happen to him. I bet Asami and Korra already have a plan for him that he's completely unaware of in case things go south." Lin smiled and Kya lifted her lips to Lin's scarred cheek.
"Come on," she said, "help me put this stuff away."
The two of them cooked together for supper, and Lin almost forgot what it was like to be home for supper, let alone to cook it.
"Okay I think I got it," Kya said, lifting the spoon to her mouth.
"Kya, that's the stirring spoon you can't lick it and put back."
"Oh yeah? Watch me." Kya drew her tongue over the spoon, maintaining eye contact with Lin and causing her to blush. Lin gulped, breaking the eye contact and Kya returned the spoon to the pot, stirring the sauce again. Lin went for the sink, grabbing Kya's butter as she went past.
"Lin!" She yelped, swatting her girlfriend playfully on the shoulder.
"I didn't do anything!"
"Yeah right!"
"I swear!" Kya narrowed her eyes, seeing through Lin's weak attempt to hide a smile.  Lin set the salad and the bread on the table, ordering the plates and glasses across form each other, lighting a candle in the center.
"Whats going on?" Kya asked, looking at Lin's arrangement.
"I figure, since we're here, I might as well make up for all the date nights I've had to reschedule, or cancel, and never got around to it." Kya looked at her thoughtfully, putting her pot on the table.
"You're telling me I've been on a date this whole time and didn't know?"
"Yep. Surprise," Kya stifled a laugh and sat across from Lin, staring at the other girl lovingly.
"Well, you should know I don't usually go home with someone on the first date."
"Well good thing its not the first date then." Kya raised her eyebrows, her eyes still locked with Lin as she brought a piece of food to her mouth. Lin caught Kya up on everything in her life, the abnormally quiet Pice Chief talked on and on, and Kya listened, absorbing every word of it.
"Kya?"
"Hmm?"
"Are you finished?"
"Oh, yeah,' she said, sitting up. Lin took her plate, and Kya admired her from behind.
"Lin," she said, "put the dishes down."
"What?"
"We'll do them tomorrow. Please, just kiss me already."
"What if you have Covid?" Kya chuckled.
"Then we'll both have it anyway." She pushed herself off her chair, meeting Lin halfway across the kitchen, their lips meeting in an epic dance. Kya jumped, wrapping her legs around Lin's waist and the metalbender's hands found places underneath Kya's thighs to hold her. Lin set her on the kitchen counter, pushing her abdomen in between Kya's legs.
"Been a while since we've done this," Lin admitted between breaths.
"We haven't had time."
"Well, now we have two weeks to make up for it." Kya smiled as Lin's lips clashed with hers again.
"I love you," Kya whispered.
"I love you too."
1 week of quarantine
"Wait so what happened in the last movie?" Kya asked, just to get a rise out of Lin.
"Kya, were you even paying attention? Qui Gon and Obi-wan, master and Padwan head to the desolate planet of Tattooine where they-"
"Lin, I'm kidding." Lin rolled her eyes and Kya cuddle in close, reaching her arm over into the popcorn bowl on Lin's lap.
"Don't do that again or I'll spoil it for you." Kya laughed, pressing a light kiss on Lin's cheek. When Kya had mentioned she'd never seen a Star Wars movie, Lin had organized a rather professional viewing of them all, in chronological order. Kya would much rather be doing something else, but she could see how excited Lin was to watch them with her, so she did. All the good (and bad) the movied had to offer.
"Whos that?"
"Anakin."
"The little boy?"
"Yeah, there's a time gap."
"Wow, he's so grown up."
"Just you wait," Lin said, placing a fistful of popcorn in her mouth. Befoee the movie could get any further, the phone rang, and Lin got up to answer it, letting the movie play for Kya.
"Hello? Pema is that you? Hmm? No we are just- really? Is everyone okay?" Kya sat up, looking over at her girlfriend with concern.
"Theres a breakout at the air temple," Lin whispered to Kya.
Oh no, poor Pema. I hope Rohan is okay.
"Is Tenzin there? Okay, well, try to stay calm, please Pema! Where's Jinora? Put her on the phone." Lin tapped the counter, waiting for the eldest of the Airbender kids to come to the phone.
"Jinora? Is everyone okay? Ikki has it? You need to keep her away from the others, don't let Rohan out of his room, and please, try to keep you're mother calm until your father gets home tomorrow. Yes... I love you too Jinora, good bye, as soon as we can leave we'll come down there." Lin put her phone on the counter with a sigh, and Kya ran up to her.
"We have to go, I can help them!" Kya pleaded.
"No, dear, we can't help them. If we go there we are just exposing ourselves to it, and I don't like to admit but we aren't exactly spring pig-chickens anymore Kya." Kya frowned, crossing her arms.
"Lin, they are our family."
"I know Kya, but we can help them by staying here, and staying healthy. Don't forget we can be incarcerated for leaving." Kya growled, scrunched her nose and Lin reached her hand out on the counter.
"One more week to go, we got this. Remember what you told me, try to enjoy it."
"Pretty sure I said we could try that technique from that movie where I use waterbending to-"
"Well I paraphrased it." Kya's lips formed a smile, and her heart melted at the soft look Lin was giving her.
"Come on," she said, "let's watch this movie." Lin nodded and the two of them returned to the sofa, Kya resting her head on Lin's lap, her hair being tousled by the police chief. Every so often she'd look up at Lin, who was absolutely enticed by the movie, even though she said it was 'the worst one.' She fell asleep before the end, and Lin let Kya stay there long into the night, moving her only once her own bladder couldn't take it any longer, placing her in their bed. Kya groaned softly, rolling over and pulling all the blankets for herself. Lin crawled in behind her, still holding her in her arms.
3 Days until the end of quarantine.
"Kya, I know you've lost all sense of time, but you need to put clothes on."
"Whats the point? No one comes, no one goes. No one sees me. No one knows..."
"If you start speaking in poetry again I'm locking you in the bathroom."
"Go ahead, at least there I hear the voices from the drain." Kya groaned, flopping onto the couch face first. Lin sighed.
"Do you.... need to talk?" Lin almost choked on the words, but it got Kya's attention and she sat upright.
"I've always been an extrovert Lin. Im a people person and now that the people in my life have been removed... I'm just a person." Lin pursed her lips, she hadn't thought about it like that before. She had always been reserved, truthfully quarantine had been easy for her, she did daily workouts, reading... other stuff with Kya. But Kya couldn't be on her phone for more than half an hour without needing a change of space.
"I don't know how to help you with that..." Lin started, "but I can... give you a hug?" Kya smiled sadly and walked up to Lin, forgetting her nudity and hugging her.
"Lets go on the porch for a bit," Kya said, "I need some air."
"You're going to have to put some clothes on then, I don't think the neighbors will appreciate your tits being out the same way I do." Kya laughed, looking down at her torso.
"Oh they would. But fine. I'll put on some clothes, but you better be the one taking them off later."
"I wouldn't have it any other way." Kya grinned, satisfied with that, before she could dissappear into the bathroom however, Lin called to her.
"Oh, Kya!"
"Yes sweetheart?"
"Maybe we can try that thing you mentioned last week." Kyas eyes went wide, and Lin smirked.
"This is why, I love you Lin Beifong."
"I love you too. Now go get dressed, we're going to miss the warmest part of the day." Kya sped off, and Lin watched her go, the same gentle smile pulling at the corners of her lips. I could be quarantined with her for the rest of my life, and I'd never get bored. When Kya returned, she skipped onto the porch, and Lin used her bending to extend the available area for the moment. Kya sat at the edge of the concrete, letting her feet hang over the edge, humming a gentle tune. Lin sat next to her, her lips pursed in indecision.
"Kya," she said, drawing the waterbenders crystal blue eyes to her. "When this is over, we should get married." Kyas eyes widened, and for a minute Lin thought she scared her, but then she was pulled into the most passionate kiss of the their relationship, nearly sending both of them to the ground below.
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likeholymary · 3 years
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— one with the force
the phantom menace ii: 4.6k words
AU: What if the Clone Wars never happened, but instead Darth Sidious cast aside the Rule of Two, forging a new way for the Sith and began amassing an army of Sith warriors to overthrow the Jedi and the Republic?
A/N: (not my gif) (excerpt below is from The Clone Wars: Wild Space by Karen Miller, slightly altered to fit the story). hello beautiful friends! the beautiful gif credit goes to @pixelahsoka. this chapter has a LOT of content so just keep that in mind! also, kind of cheesy ending but whatever, hehe. also, yes, to confirm, obi-wan and rhea are a force dyad. however, it will (hopefully) be better than the sequels, bc i felt like it just came out of nowhere. their romance will be a slow-burn to them actually accepting it, with them still being at least semi-romantical along the way, so look forward to that! this chapter is filled with a lot of fluff, and a very angsty ending. this is the last chapter set during the phantom menace, so the next chapter will be set during attack of the clones, where most of the AU aspect will begin to pick up! comment below or send me an ask if you would like to join the taglist and be notified about the upcoming chapters! again, i am so grateful that you are even reading this, and if you feel compelled to do so, please reblog this post so your mutuals can read it as well! i love you all:) masterlist
mentions: death, blood, fighting, MAJOR angst, force connection, sadness.
The Master and Apprentice began their departure from the Jedi Temple on their Naboo, and Obi-Wan did not think it wise. 
Not after the Dathomirian man had appeared on that Maker-forsaken dustball with a red lightsaber, which only meant one thing – the Sith had returned.
He breathed in the pale glow of the planet’s moon, not taking time to look up and watch the stars glitter above, instead making short strides behind Qui-Gon, the shadow of the Naboo ship creeping its way across to cover them in more darkness, further darkening Obi-Wan’s mood and attitude towards the continuation of this ill-fated mission. 
Having just left the council’s chambers, he felt immense frustration, not only at the council, but at his Master as well. Not only was he ready to face the Jedi Trials which the council seemed to be denying him the right to, now his Master was all too eager to take on the latest lifeform they had picked up on their Naboo adventures, a boy believed to be the Chosen One by his Master.  
Not only was the boy too old, but Obi-Wan could sense it just as the council had – a great fear was buried deep within this Anakin Skywalker. A fear that was all consuming, and was growing slowly within him since they had left Tatooine and the boy’s mother behind.
Why could his master not sense it as he and the council did? Did he just assume ignorance for the possibilities to witness the forthcoming of a prophecy? He never understood his Master’s obsession with the old Jedi prophecies. It was an area of interest he sorely lacked, something that he felt put a strain on his relationship with Qui-Gon, something he realized that Qui-Gon probably wished Obi-Wan was intrigued by, but both of them knew that their Master-Apprentice relationship would never be like that of Dooku and Qui-Gon. 
Rhea, however, had been Dooku’s apprentice and shared a similar, if not less, affinity for the supernatural and old ways of the Jedi. Perhaps he could pay her a visit once his mission was completed, or even send her a message over their datapads like they used to before they got increasingly more busy as padawans. 
Surprise began to grow in him when he saw Rhea standing on the platform beside the ship. She had been waiting on him. As Qui-Gon began to speak to Anakin privately, Obi-Wan ran over to her with a small grin on his face. He should have known she would be here, for every time he simply thought of her, it seemed she was always nearby, as if she were watching over him.
“What are you doing here?” He beamed.
Obi-Wan couldn’t help but notice the blush dusting her cheeks, even in the shadow of the ship. 
“I couldn’t just let you leave without saying goodbye, now could I?”
“You said goodbye to me before the council meeting.”
Rhea rolled her eyes, groaning in annoyance before she began to simper quietly, punching him in the shoulder. “Well, yes, but I couldn’t give you this in front of the council, now could I?”  She held out her arms, opening them in anticipation for one of their rare hugs. When they were younglings, it was of course more sociably acceptable for them to embrace, however as the years began to pass and after many scoldings from each of their masters, they hid it away for special occasions or the few moments they would ever share alone, which were few and far between.
Obi-Wan buried his face in her shoulder, breathing in the sort of meadowy scent she always seemed to carry, as if she were the greatest meadow within the galaxy, filled with thousands of flowers constantly doused by the warm air and golden sunshine, only to be damped by a cool spring rain. She was a wonder, in his eyes.
Rhea’s arms wrapped around his neck as he lifted his head so he could carefully place his chin on top of her head, ever so sweetly. She equally breathed him in, sighing as she inhaled the overwhelming musk of rain, leather and perhaps even some old oak and a few of his dusty books. He always did become overly invested in his new findings, nose deep in his studies, but she wouldn’t have it any other way.
The two stood there for but a moment, taking every part of each other in as if it were the last time they would see each other, and to Rhea, she felt like it was.
“Promise.. promise you’ll come back?” Obi-Wan pulled away, simpering down at her with a twinkle in his eyes.
“When have I ever not?”
Rhea scowled for a second, her face quickly softening once more. “Just promise me, you idiot.”
“Fine, I promise you, dearest.”
She rolled her eyes at the nickname, breathing out a short laugh, before launching herself further into his arms, her fingers lacing through his shortly buzzed hair. Now for this, well, she wasn’t sure what Master Windu would have to say if he saw her like this, but she knew that it would be a deep scolding. It seemed so stupidly forbidden for her to just be lacing her fingers through his hair, but she paid no mind to the Jedi Code in the moment. 
Rhea was his dearest, and he her Ben, and yet, the pain of the loss of her Master still fresh on her mind, reminded her why she could not become attached to this overly-complex relationship the two padawans shared. 
It’s time to let go. 
And yet, she couldn’t. And neither could he.
╔═━────━▒ ۞ ▒━────━═╗
Obi-Wan Kenobi sat on the Queen’s ship while they flew through hyperspace back to Naboo. It seemed such a foolish idea to be returning to the invaded planet, but he did as he was told just as he always did, and followed the willful lead of his master. They were but a small force, two Jedi, a Queen and a handful of her people. What could they really do? If the Sith really had returned, could they really defeat them as well as an entire army?
The Queen had suggested they call upon the aid of the Gungans, but Obi-Wan questioned if that would work as well. The Gungans seemed to have a deeply seeded hatred for the people of Naboo, as it was obvious that in the past the former had treated the other like insolent fools. He wasn’t sure that he could disagree after spending so much time around Jar Jar Binks.
A light bit of laughter echoed in his mind, and it sounded like Rhea. He must have just imagined talking to her, Rhea giggling at his comments and avidly agreeing while coming up with her own quippy comment.
Obi-Wan could not help but miss the girl.
Alone in his small room aboard the ship, he tried closing his eyes so as to meditate, folding his hands together as he crossed his legs, breathe in, breathe out.
But she was still there.
Get out of my head.
He thought almost mockingly, knowing that she surely couldn’t be listening to his thoughts from such far a distance.
Why don’t you get out of mine, Ben?
Obi-Wan was shaken. There was absolutely no way-
I’m still here. Could you help me get out? You’re thinking about me too much, and I’m a little offended that you’re annoyed of my presence.
Obi-Wan then snapped his eyes open, and there sitting in front of him was none other than his dearest, greatest life companion, Rhea Illyria, with a smile of a thousand stars.
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Rhea Illyria sat on her bed in her quarters inside the Jedi Temple, breathing in, breathing out, as she performed her daily morning meditation. She knew many other padawans and younglings who hated the act of meditation, but she found it rather peaceful, a time to focus on the energy of the Force, to feel it moving around her and all other life forms.
She, however, became momentarily distracted by the thought of Obi-Wan Kenobi and his departure back to Naboo. She sighed, wishing she could have gone with him. There was something in the Force, something that felt like a warning about the planet of Naboo, and those who invaded. No, not the invaders... The ones controlling the invaders, pulling the strings. Who were they? The Sith? Or was it something... something much greater and evil in all forms and aspects?
Rhea worried for Obi-Wan and his mission, and she couldn’t help the thoughts consuming her not only of the danger of his mission, but of the padawan and their untold and unseen embrace. 
However, there was a nagging feeling in her gut. The Force pulling her towards something... No, someone.
She could just reach out, and suddenly her eyes were meet with the galaxy, planets dancing by as the stars glimmered all around her. She was walking among them, slowly, as if moving through the tides of the deepest oceans.
Breathe in, breathe out. What is the Force pushing you towards?
Rhea could see something ahead, a silver shape slowly getting closer as she continued to wade her way through stars and the black dusts of the galaxy.
Someone was thinking intensely. Someone was annoyed.
She couldn’t help but giggle at the notion of the Gungans being quite unintelligent creatures, or at least Jar Jar Binks, the creature someone was thinking about.
The closer Rhea got to the shape, she noticed it took the form of the ship from Naboo, the ship that carried its queen, the ship that carried him.
Someone was Obi-Wan.
This had to be some dream, she thought. She must have drifted into some sleep while she was meditating. But at the same moment she drifted through space, she breathed in, and could feel the sheets of her bed curl around her fingers, sense the starflower in the corner of her window, could smell the caf she so desperately needed each day after her meditations.
Despite trying to refocus on her true surroundings, Rhea became lost in the stars once more when something pushed back against her.
Get out of my head.
Rhea huffed, and began to more faster, willing the stars around her to move, to allow her closer access to the ship. She continued to wade and move through slowly, yet determined.
Why don’t you get out of mine, Ben?
She could feel his confusion, and despite her own, she couldn’t help but find some joy in this strange place. How she was able to drift through the stars to the other padawan was certainly not a normal occurrence among the Jedi, nor within the Force.
He couldn’t believe she was there either. He was thinking about her, thinking about how he missed her, which tugged at something within her she had never noticed before.
Her fingers finally grace the cool metal of the ship, however, they moved through its surface, and she was able to pass through, allowing the Force to guide her to her dear friend.
At the same time, he became frustrated by her presence distracting him from his own meditation.
I’m still here. Could you help me get out? You’re thinking about me too much, and I’m a little offended that you’re annoyed of my presence.
She was no longer floating within the ship, and instead now found herself grounded, sitting cross legged across Obi-Wan.
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“Ho-how are you even here? I must be dreaming, there is no way that this could possibly be real. I mean, have you ever read about Jedi being able to communicate with each other over vast distances such as this? This is simply impossible!”  Obi-Wan rambled, tugging at his chin, brow furrowed as his mouth gaped slightly at the sight of Rhea.
She however, rolled her eyes, unamused this time by his consistent desire for the knowledge of just about everything. This had to be under the category he loved the least, and she treasured the most – the supernatural ongoings of the Force.
“Ben!” She finally shouted, smacking him on his forehead to get his attention.
This brought Obi-Wan to attention, but also caused both padawans to touch their forehead and hand respectively.
“How did you do that!” “How did I do that?”
Rhea and Obi-Wan were, to say the least, perplexed and befuddled by the situation before them. Obi-Wan, deciding the best course of action was to hypothesize how this anomaly could have occurred in the Force, decided they should each ask one another questions regarding just how this had happened.
“What were you doing when this,” he motioned between them, “happened?” Rhea bit her bottom lip, furrowing her brow just as he had. “I was meditating. It’s morning back at the Temple, so I was doing my morning meditations...” Obi-Wan’s hand remained on his chin, his forefinger rubbing incessantly across his upper lip. 
“As was I. Continue, please,” he spoke so softly, she almost wondered if he was trying to be quiet so no one would hear them and come looking.
“Well, my meditations were interrupted by thoughts of you.” Obi-Wan paused his menstruations, his eyes darting to meet hers.
“You were thinking about me?” 
“Well, yes–” “Why?” She grew flustered, a growing pain pounding in her chest, sharp and yet harsh. Her hands began to sweat as she started to wring them out like some old tunic on washing day, her eyes swooping to avoid his ever piercing-blue gaze.
“I don’t know, why were you thinking about me!” She retorted.
It was one of the few times Obi-Wan got speechless and she could not help but gleam with pride at catching his tongue. She knew this trait would probably die with age, the older her got the further he became closer to the title of a silver tongued master, however she knew she would look back on this moment and know she had trumped him at his own game.
“I–” However, he never got a singular thought out, as Qui-Gon began to shout Obi-Wan’s name like he were some incessant father trying to find his son after a long game of hide-and-go-seek.
Obi-Wan cursed under his breath, a moment of panic coursing through him, but when he looked back from the door to Rhea, she was gone, and he once again was alone, feeling a strange and overwhelming sense of sadness.
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Rhea tried to continue her day as usual, but her gut instinct inside of her told her that there was something more to her apparent Force projection than it just being that. No... she knew there was something more to this event that had just occurred in not only her life, but Obi-Wan’s. Everything felt like it was going to change.
Unfocused in her training with Mace Windu, he scolded her throughout the day, noting her lack of focus and charging her with consistent complaints about her lack of balance. 
How could she feel balanced? How was she supposed to feel balance after she lacked control over her own capabilities through the Force? How could she feel balance when it had alluded her since the day her Master abandoned her for a life without her as his apprentice? 
How could she feel balance without anyone there to guide her? “The Force, guide you, it will.” 
Rhea nearly ran over Master Yoda who now stood in the Temple’s halls in front of her, smiling just as knowingly as he had every day she could remember. 
“Master Yoda, I didn’t see you there.” “Loud your thoughts are. Many things on your mind, are there not?” 
Rhea could not help but feel guilty and caught. Surely though, Master Yoda could be the one to help her. She had so many questions weighing her down, aching to be asked, and yet she felt ashamed to even think them to herself. Now, it seemed that there were those who were listening. 
“Master, I just feel so lost.”
Yoda hummed, chuckling to himself as if he held all the secrets of the world to himself and would just become amused by the ongoings of the beings around him.
“Come with me, you will.” Yoda motioned for her to follow him, as he guided her toward the meditation room. He sat down on a small chair meant for younglings, and she sat adjacent from him, not really knowing if a meditation session was going to help. After all, it’s what got her into this conundrum.
“Close you eyes. Focus not on your surroundings, but the Force.”
Rhea breathed in, breathed out, closing her eyes as she began to let go of her surroundings, allowing them to fade away. 
“See what is in the Force that troubles you, and tell me what it is.” 
She wasn’t sure if she should reach out again. What if she connected with another Jedi like she had with Obi-Wan? But surely, that would not happen. She had been thinking of him, just as she was now.
Images then began to flow through her mind. A beautiful green planet under siege by the droid armies of the Separatists, a cloaked man with a red lightsaber watching over her as she slept, Dooku the day he left her without even looking behind, her connection with Obi-Wan earlier that morning, him falling...
“I see the droid armies invading Naboo.. A Sith watching over me. Dooku leaving the Jedi Order.... and..”
“More there is?”
“Yes..” Rhea whispered, but she couldn’t focus on the grainy voice of Yoda. She kept reaching out, as if pulling the Force towards her like a rope, trying to yank it so it would release all of its secrets it was holding from her.
And into the Force she fell.
Everything around her was blurry, she couldn’t focus on anything except the strength of the Dark Side coursing before her. It was Obi-Wan. And he had given into all of his anger and hatred, an overwhelming tsunami of darkness coating every inch of him and not it began to creep upon her, splashing her with the emotions flowing out of him.
No, he cannot give into this. She thought, watching as he fell into the pool of darkness waiting to swallow him whole.
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His master was dead. 
Obi-Wan watched as Qui-Gon crumpled to the floor, and he screamed in agony as he was trapped behind the laser shield, hopelessly witnessing the death of his Master.  And he could not help the growing rage and hatred that began to engulf his entire being, becoming greater with each second as he practically jumped, ready for the laser shield to move so he could slaughter this hunter before him, this Sith, this darkness.
His face twitched, his mouth curling downward into a snarl, complete loathe shining in his eyes which now darkened as he turned his gaze upon the Dathomirian. 
The Sith trailed before him like some wild beast waiting for its prey, stalking like some dark creature.
A moment before the laser shields even began to move once again, Obi-Wan ignited his lightsaber, seconds before a red bladed lightsaber was ignited as well. The shields moved, and Obi-Wan raised his saber, going to strike the beast of red and darkness down, going to strike for the kill out of the rage and hatred in his heart.
The darkness was consuming him, but Obi-Wan did not care. How could he care now? His master was dead, and this creature seemed a powerful foe within the Force, something that should be put down for the sake of the Republic and the safety of its citizens.... something that should pay for its crimes against the Jedi, it’s crimes against him.
He blocked every twist and twirl it made with its lightsaber, blocking its attacks by pushing back against it with more fervent and less coordinated attacks. If he could only strike it down... 
Obi-Wan lifted his lightsaber, slashing through the center of its double-bladed saber, cutting the pieces in half as one went out. He flipped over the creature, slashing at his center and sorrowfully missing him by an inch. 
This creature was quick, but he had to be quicker, he had to be. What would his Master say if he failed him? What would Rhea say if he were to fall, just as Qui-Gon had moments ago? He would not dare break a promise to her.
The creature kicked him in the face, but he did not let it affect him, instead holding out his lightsaber in front of him, looking for the best place to strike him down.  As their blades locked, Obi-Wan gritted his teeth as he pushed against the creature, his eyes glaring deeply into those sickly-yellow ones, now pushing down against his blade. Anger filled him, and rage too, however, the Sith lifted its hand, using the Force and propelling him across the room, and into the shaft. Obi-Wan grabbed ahold of a light as he began to fall, holding on for dear life as the Sith once again began to trail above him, stalking like a creature in the night. He watched helplessly as it kicked his lightsaber down into the shaft, the weapon, his life, now falling down just as hopelessly as he felt. 
Obi-Wan had to keep on holding on. He had to get back up there, he had to avenge his Master’s death. 
No.
As the Sith caused sparks to rain down from above onto him, attempting to get him to lose grip and fall, Obi-Wan could hear her speaking to him.
Do not give into the darkness. Do not give into the anger or hate. Rise above.
A second voice this time came.
Trust only in the Force.
Qui-Gon.
Rise above. 
And for a moment, Obi-Wan closed his eyes. Rhea was there, almost floating before him, but he couldn’t see anything around her, only she was in his mind. 
I will stand together with you. Rise above. 
“It occurred to Obi-Wan then, with a clarity that was startling, given the dark side hurricane howling through him, that Yoda was wrong about the dangers of attachment. Or at least that he wasn’t altogether right. It was true that attachment could weaken a Jedi’s resolve. But it could also strengthen it … as he was strengthened now by his love for Qui-Gon, and Rhea. Without them he would have failed long before this moment. And so, leaning on them, he continued to fight.”
And so, Obi-Wan opened his eyes, using the Force to propel him upwards as he jumped, landing behind the Sith and now focusing his energy, not through the Dark Side, but now back through the Force, allowing it to guide him now. Qui-Gon’s fallen lightsaber now flew into his hand as he landed, and with a swift movement of his wrist, Obi-Wan cut through the Dathomirian man, ending the terrors he had caused, as he fell down the shaft, thus causing yet another fall in the rise of the Sith.
For a moment he stood and just breathed, thanking the Force for his strength found in his love for his Master and friend.
Obi-Wan, sensing his Master’s lifeforce still flickering within him, ran to his side, cradling his head as gently as he could, holding onto some form of hope that his Master could still live. 
“It’s... it’s too late.”
“No, no!” 
“Obi-Wan..” Qui-Gon croaked, as best he could, the color draining from his face slowly, marking him with death as his lifeforce continued to flicker, dimming with each passing second. “Promise... promise me you will train the boy.”
“Yes, master..” Obi-Wan wept in response. Qui-Gon raise his hand to wipe his tears, and Obi-Wan rested his cheek lightly against his finger, wishing that this wasn’t the end.
“He is... the Chosen One. He will bring balance. Train him. Help him. You and Rhea must help him....”
Obi-Wan now momentarily forgot his grief, filled with confusion at the mention of his friend. 
“Rhea and I? Master, what do you–”
“There is more to the prophecy than what you know..”
“What, Master, I–”
Qui-Gon hushed him, before uttering his final words. “Train him.” He uttered his final breath, and Obi-Wan, cradling him, felt as if he were destined for some infinite sadness.
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Rhea supposed Naboo was a truly beautiful planet, one to behold amongst the galaxy, but it seemed so bleak and somber now with the death of Master Qui-Gon Jinn. 
She watched the pyre his body laid upon gather with flames that rose to meet the stars in the sky, the smoke dancing among the small lights glittering above.
Standing beside the young boy from Tatooine who introduced himself as Anakin Skywalker, she listened silently to the loss of sound in the Force that was Qui-Gon’s lifeforce. They all felt it, the small darkness that passed over them at the loss of such a wise Jedi.
Obi-Wan stood on the other side of Anakin, who looking up to him, asked, “What will happen to me now?”
“The council has granted me permission to train you. You will be a Jedi, I promise.”
Rhea still could not believe that Obi-Wan had not only become a Jedi Knight, but had also defeated and killed a Sith lord. How they had come to rise again, was still a mystery, but it caused a shroud of confusion and chaos to flow through the Force.
It was hard for Rhea to muddle through, her mind now more clouded and confused than ever, the events having transpired seeming to all be connected — Dooku leaving the Order, the Chosen One supposedly being found, the Sith returning, her bond with Obi-Wan...
It all seemed too obvious in her mind to not be connected, but Mace Windu continued to tell her to be mindful of her thoughts, even if he didn’t know of her bond with Obi-Wan, he still saw her point of view as a quick jump to conclusions.
As the procession ended and people began to filter out from the area of the funeral pyre, she stayed even as little Anakin left along with the other Jedi, staying by Obi-Wan’s side, just as she had promised.
“You’re still here.”
He said, nonchalantly, not even bothering to turn to face her.
Rhea looked up, turning her gaze to fixate on his face. He looked... tired, almost old, held down not only by exhaustion but by the overwhelming sense of loss and sadness which was now being carried by the duty he felt to honor his masters final wish.
“Just as I said I would always be. Right by your side.”
He sighed, turning to look down upon her, his blue eyes meeting with her darker ones.
“So, you really were there, speaking to me.”
“I suppose I was.”
The two were silent for a moment, simply staring into each other’s eyes as if understanding everything they wished to say. Rhea reached up, cupping his cheek softly as tears began to fall down his face.
She then got up on her tippy toes, being much shorter than him, and placed a slow kiss on his forehead, soft and lovingly and holding every hope she had within her.
Obi-Wan sighed softly, “We can’t tell anyone about this bond. Not until I have figured out what exactly it is.”
“We.”
“What?”
“Not until we have figured out what exactly it is. We’re in this together. I told you this already, but you don’t seem to be getting it through your thick skull. I stand by you. Always.”
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journen · 3 years
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I sort of have to ask "Obi Wan" as a character
(for science)
Oh yes, of course, for science.
(Strap in for what I’m sure are going to be several very long answers lol.)
First impression
Okay, I first watched SW in a very strange order… so I think my first impression of him was Old Ben! And I remember being confused when he died lol. But the most distinctive first impression I remember was as we were watching the Clone Wars(this was before I watched the prequels) we were a few episodes in, so I was still learning who everyone and anything were because my SW knowledge was 0, but I remember saying to my roommate during that snowy episode in season 1, “I think I like Obi-Wan Kenobi. I like how he talks!” LOL!
Then the moment that solidified him as my favourite character was from Attack of the Clones when he goes to visit Dex, and was fiddling with the little Kamino dart looking super awkward, I thought that was so funny. And I never recovered I guess lol.
Impression now
He is literally my favourite character of all time. And his story is so sad.
Favourite moment
Oh my.. there are too many. I honestly love every scene he's in… anything between him and Qui Gon, Maul, and Satine I really enjoy. I love his “Good job!” moment in AOTC, I love when he rides Boga in ROTS, and all of his fight scenes, vs Maul(and Savage too) Anakin.. all are so damn cool!
Oh, but some of my other favourite moments of his are from the books. In M&A where Obi-Wan learns about Qui Gon's invitation to the council and the argument they have afterwards is up there, as well as pretty much EVERY scene he's in in the Kenobi book, including his meditations. They are all so emotional. But I’m just gonna leave it as that because if I write more this answer is gonna be double the length lol.
Idea for a story
I also have so many! I keep a google doc where I write out all my story ideas(needless to say, it is very long) and I’ll pick a few I’m not too shy to share lol.
-A story about young Anakin(in the v early ages of his Jedi training) and Obi getting stranded on a planet with no ships or communication devices. They go through many struggles to get back to safety, but ultimately learn more about each other how to work together.
-On Tatooine, there is an event where kid Luke gets stranded alone in danger, and Obi-Wan comes to the rescue, and it’s the first time he’s really seen Luke up close in a long time bc Owen doesn’t let him near, and poor Luke was so scared he runs and gives Obi-Wan a big hug and is crying :(
I also have many AU ideas I’m working through, like what if Satine(and Korkie) survived and joined Obi-Wan on Tatooine, what if Anakin told Obi-Wan about his feelings towards Padmé and if that would have changed anything… As well as many ideas for what could have happened during Qui Gon, Satine and Obi's year on Mandalore.
Unpopular opinion
I don’t know if I have a real unpopular one! Maybe, and I don’t think this is really that controversial, is that to me he has one of if not the saddest story of all the Star Wars characters. He goes through so much tragedy and pain, but maybe the saddest part is that he always remains good throughout all of it.
Favourite relationship
Obi-Wan and Satine! Nothing even comes close. I’m usually not big on romances(normally because I think they aren’t done well) but this one is everything I could have wanted. I just wish in a way it didn’t end so tragically, but if it did then we wouldn’t have the story we do in the movies would we. Lol.
Favourite headcanon
Omg, again, there are so many. I’ve seen some people write Obi-Wan getting really painful periodic migraines and I kinda liked that idea, as well as that he barely gets any sleep because he’s always working so hard(but I think the fandom has pretty much made that one canon lol).
One head-canon idea I had is that he was bullied a lot when he was young. He was kind of small, and so some of the meaner kids underestimated/targeted him. :( This led him to develop some of his aggressive tendencies, which he eventually grew out of of course under Qui-Gon’s tutelage, but I liked the idea that maybe Anakin, once he was a knight, somehow found out from one of Obi's old friends that he used to be bullied a lot(because Obi Wan often keeps his past a secret) and was like… “What…Obi-Wan?? How? That doesn’t make any sense??” Lol.
Wow, I swear I tried to keep this shorter LOL! RIP me. 😭 Thank you though for the ask, my friend!!
Character ask post is here 😊
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val-aquenta · 3 years
Text
So hey y’all. Remember me talking about that au yesterday where Anakin leaves the order and Obi-Wan and Anakin just drift apart. Well it’s here for the prompt: “I’m right here where you left me.” Anyways. This will be my last piece for angstpril for this year as I want some kind of break before Mace Windu appreciation to plan or stuff. So yeah. Thank you for coming on this journey, it’s been fun.
Here on ao3
Obi-Wan watched him walk away just like Anakin had once watched Ahsoka walk away and down. His heart broke just a bit then, seeing the broad, robed shoulders dip past the line of the stairs, the blonde curls disappearing as he walked down. Mace, strong and unmoving, laid a hand against his shoulder as he swallowed, a suspicious lump in his throat. He inhaled sharply, standing straight. The hand remained, a warm pillar that he could lean on should he wish. He didn’t.
The quarters were empty. Just him and the remnants of the past. He sighed, he should probably get to cleaning. Mace, he’d almost forgotten. He turned around, facing the taller man. “Mace, I should…”
“Take a break, Obi-Wan.” He said, a grim sort of smile on his face. “Force knows you deserve it.” 
Obi-Wan nodded and bowed. “I will.” He promised softly, not fully trusting his voice not to break. “May the Force be with you.” 
Mace bowed back, “And with you, Obi-Wan.” He turned and began walking away down the hallway, just like everyone else did. However, Mace turned around at some point, something desperate shining in his eyes and bleeding into the Force. He wanted to help. Obi-Wan just didn’t know how to accept it. “You ask if you need anything, alright? We’re all here for you.” Obi-Wan could only find it in himself to nod shakily, thanking the Force for blessing him with Mace. Mace seemed to want to say something before smiling ruefully and turning down a corner, waving behind in farewell.
He closed the door behind him, hand raising to his beard, absently stroking it. There was… too much here. A Temple room which had housed Qui-Gon and him, then Anakin and him, then Anakin, Ahsoka and him, and now finally just him. It was large, enough room to have two and a half people living comfortably. Anakin only stayed with them half the time. It felt strangely empty. Four generations of Jedi growing up here and now the only remainder of this lineage, just him, still lived there. The throw blanket, Anakin’s because he had simply been too unused to Coruscant’s climate, still laid half open from where Anakin had used it recently. His belongings, at least what little remained in the quarters after spending half his time apparently married to Senator Amidala, had been hastily packed away and taken to her apartments, Anakin’s new one. No doubt, he would have left a few things which he would either comm for or would simply be returned to him. 
Obi-Wan sighed, folding the blanket and throwing it over the back of the couch. It was ridiculously soft, comfortable for curling up with. He made his way to the kitchen, opening the cooling unit and seeing it still filled with Anakin’s favourite sauce, Anakin’s special juice (probably with alcohol. Obi-Wan hated it with a passion,) Anakin’s favourite everything. He sighed and shut the door quickly. Tea, he decided, would be able to be made with little memories of Anakin. Ever the odd one out, he had not enjoyed the intricacies of tea like Yoda, Dooku, Qui-Gon, Ahsoka, and himself had. Instead he had drunk caff, violently sweetened and strong enough to rouse a slumbering Krayt dragon with solely it’s scent. Cup fresh in hand, he moved to Anakin’s rooms where he could begin cleaning the reminders of Anakin away. Begin the process of truly becoming himself once more. 
He sees Anakin three weeks later. Predictably, there had been quite a few things left over. Obi-Wan, whenever he found one had placed it in a box, waiting for Anakin. “Hey Master!” Anakin greeted, dressed in fancy garments, very different from the leather tabards, perhaps not as traditional as Obi-Wan’s cream robes, but still rather traditional. They suited him. Perhaps more than Jedi robes ever did, Obi-Wan mused quietly in the pits of his mind.
“Hello Anakin. Come to retrieve your items?” He raised an eyebrow as he noticed the haircut, more like a trim. Anakin had been growing it out, ends raggedly poking out where they wished. It looked tamed, coiffed in a fashion that Obi-Wan began to recognise as Nabooan. He moved from the corner, inviting him in. He’d never done that before. Anakin entered awkwardly, quickly making a beeline from the rather full box of assorted materials. “You left behind quite a few items. Tea?” He offered, hands tucked into his robe sleeves.
“No thank you… unless it’s floral.” Obi-Wan raised his eyebrows in surprise, sending a silent question at Anakin. “Oh. Padmè, she’s got this blend in her rooms from Naboo. Really delicate and sweet.”
“Interesting.” Obi-Wan tried not to be bitter over the fact that despite over a decade of his efforts to get Anakin into some kind of tea, Senator Amidala had done it in less than a month. “I did not think you would ever willingly drink tea.” He murmured, somewhat idly bustling away to prepare his most floral, and sweet tea. 
Anakin chuckled, hoisting the box in his hands. “Yeah… er, Master? I know I said yes to tea, but Padmè has this function thing she wanted me to go to soon. So…” He trailed off apologetically. Obi-Wan stopped where he was rifling through his canisters of tea, plastering an easy but false smile onto his face. Anakin could only tell the difference sometimes. Hopefully he was distracted enough not to. 
“Of course. No worries. I’m sure you’re busy.” Anakin did not notice it. That stung. “I’ll just…” He bustled to the door, clicking it open. Anakin followed, box easily balanced with liberal use of the Force. 
“Well…” There is a silence, pregnant and uncomfortable. Obi-Wan shifts slightly. “Are you busy too? With relief missions and stuff?” Obi-Wan wonders what he can say and what is confidential. Once, he would have shared almost everything, but Anakin isn’t a Jedi anymore, isn’t here… with him. 
“A lot to do, as I thought, but it is relieving to do something that is not fighting anymore.” Obi-Wan admits easily. No specifics, just vague truths. “Being at peace, it is a good feeling.” Indeed. There is a lightness in the Force that he hasn’t felt in a while.
“Yeah. The Force is… warm. Light.” Anakin nods in agreement, items in the box clinking as they move against each other. There is another silence, deeply uncomfortable. Obi-Wan’s cheeks colour. He has been coined the Negotiator but he can not even speak with his own former Padawan now. The rift is just… wide now, in ways it was not before. 
“Yes. Well… your function?” 
Anakin startles, as though he’s forgotten which… is not exactly unlikely. “Oh yeah. Sorry Master, gotta go.” And, just like before, Anakin moves away, walking down the hallways for the exit. Instead of robes shoulders and unruly hair, Anakin is now all fancy fashionable clothing and perfectly done hair. Obi-Wan slumps against the doorframe, waiting until Anakin turns a corner before returning back to his quarters. It feels like a cruel mirror of the day Anakin first left, except Mace is not there and his room is even emptier, the few knick knacks of Anakin now gone. He sighs. He’s prepared water for tea, might as well use it and make himself a cup of tea. 
There is a long period before he sees Anakin again, just a glimpse of him in the corner of his eyes as he steps out of the Senate and into a speeder, Senator Amidala visibly pregnant. They don’t notice him, but he supposes that it is only a short moment, hardly their fault. The speeder emits a low hum before pulling away and racing for the speeder lanes. He hopes that Anakin is driving more cautiously with Padmè because of her pregnancy.
He sees Anakin a handful of times as Padmè's pregnancy continues, standing next to Senator Amidala in holo’s, Ahsoka sometimes with him, or on the other side of a function he’s been invited, or in the Senate pod for Naboo. There is no real talk, and their meetings become few and far between. The distance, not consciously done by either of then, begins to feel insurmountable. The handful of moments grow further apart. 
Obi-Wan catches him with Senator Amidala as they leave a function, no doubt returning to the newborn children they now have. The two are dressed wonderfully in a matching outfit, cool blue and green. Their hair is done up. Obi-Wan notes how sharply they contrast him and his cream robes and short hair.  “Congratulations. I heard you had twins.”
“Master Kenobi, what a surprise!” Padmè says, smiling at him. “Yes. Luke and Leia. Ani named them.” She tugs Anakin’s arm a bit, adoring eyes turning in his direction, a wide smile on her face. 
“Yeah, Master. They’re the cutest. You should see them!” Anakin says excitedly. “Padmè can he…?” He trails off questioningly, eyes pleading with her. 
“Of course, of course.” She says. “I know how important he is to you.” Her voice is soft, only loud enough for Anakin. She looks at Anakin before turning to Obi-Wan. “Of course, only if you want to.”
“I would love to, but I… actually have something to do.” He says sadly. “I only came to offer congratulations.” He feels guilty at their twin expressions falling into a light dejection before Padmè is tugging at Anakin’s sleeve. 
“Well, Ani, we just have to invite him when he’s not busy. In… two years? Three?” She jokes lightly. The three chuckle softly before there is a pause, awkward and full of the gentle rustles of fabric as they shift a bit. 
“Indeed.” Obi-Wan finally responds, an easy smile lighting his face. “I’ll just call you when I have free time. I would like to see them.” He leaves soon after, the two bidding him a fond farewell. He never has time to make that call, he hardly ever has free time with all the relief missions going on. Mace says that he’s drowning in work to avoid his problems, but Obi-Wan would disagree. By the time he thinks he’s free enough to visit them, Obi-Wan spends ten minutes staring at the contact on his comm. Shame rises, it has been years since the function and it feels too late to call them to ask to see the twins. The meetings between then and now have been formal, in events where Obi-Wan wore dress robes and represented the Order officially, or they have been fleeting, glimpses across the Senate or on opposite ends of a transport.
Obi-Wan and Anakin meet in the hangar of some backwater planet by pure coincidence. It is one of the first times he’s seen Anakin without Padmè at his side. Obi-Wan is leaving his ship as he spots Anakin walking up, his back turned away. Anakin feels him in the Force and turns instinctively, eyes locking with his. They stare for a moment, just a second, before Anakin turns, not even waving or acknowledging him, and climbs up the ship. Obi-Wan finds himself watching the ship lift off and disappear into a small pinprick of light amongst millions, feeling an acute piercing sense of loss. His mind replays sparse moments of connections. He does not know exactly when, but Anakin’s been slipping away for a while. It is only now that Obi-Wan is realising it. 
Obi-Wan and Anakin. Kenobi and Skywalker. The names once only ever used in tandem. Each one following the other into battle and in space, to the ends of the world. Once as close as brothers, so in tune with each other. Some starships still bear the symbol that would showcase their connection to each other. Two halves of a whole. Now… little connects them. Obi-Wan has not even seen Anakin’s children save for small snapshots of their lives from the other end of a fancy dress party, and some footage of them on a holonews report about a break in. He had not even messaged or called Anakin to ask about his health after that. Simply looking at the contact made him almost want to throw the device at the wall, but that would not help. The problem wasn't the device, it was just them and their lives falling apart from each other. No, they are not close. Not at all. Obi-Wan looks at Anakin no. the new Anakin. He’s changed a lot. The scar still cuts his face roguishly, accentuated by subtle makeup. His hair is long, braided and pinned into an elegant style on his head. His robes, a riot of colour, mostly warm orange tones. Little reminds Obi-Wan of the Jedi knight, recklessly driving forwards with his blue blade raised high, let alone the young Padawan he had once held so dearly by his side. He has let Anakin walk away and Anakin is not his Anakin anymore. The lump of emotion, a solid block laying in his throat threatens to choke him. 
“Hey Master, or should I say Grandmaster Kenobi?” There is that teasing tone, strangely stiff yet still familiar. The motion is familiar, ingrained after there decade of companionship, but rusty with disuse. Yoda had stepped down, age forcing the green troll to spend it in easy meditation with younglings and Masters alike. Obi-Wan finds Yoda’s shared meditations a highlight of his week. Lately, though, he has an inkling that the little Master is falling asleep during meditation. He doesn’t have a heart to point it out, not when the wrinkled clawed hand will reach for his after and lightly squeeze, a soft smile curving the wrinkled face when Obi-Wan responds similarly. He’s also pretty sure Yoda knows he knows.
Obi-Wan quirks a smile at Anakin’s quip. The smile feels formal and stiff. When had their easy camaraderie turned to… this. “Hello Anakin, or should I say Senator Skywalker.” Anakin had become Tatooine’s first Senator, notorious for starting revolutions and rebellions on planets as well as causing problems in the Senate. There is silence, not the easy silence they had in the calm before a battle. It is uncomfortable, glances shared between them awkwardly. Obi-Wan both wishes and does not for those times before Anakin left. “Well, perhaps I should g-”
Anakin speaks in tandem, “Master I-”
“Oh… sorry, go on.” Obi-Wan gestures a bit with his hand in a waving motion. 
Anakin pauses for a moment, hesitating before speaking, something flashing in his eyes and in the Force, some kind of desperation for something. Closure, perhaps. “Obi-Wan… we hardly ever talk. Like we used to, you know?” Obi-Wan nods, his hands clasped respectfully in front of him under his robe sleeves. “We almost never see each other. I never see you around anymore.” There is a hint of accusation as if it is Obi-Wan’s fault that they never see each other. Anger flares softly before it is controlled, accepted and let go. It is not his fault, nor is it Anakin’s. They have simply… drifted apart. It has happened naturally over the course of years. The bonds that had once bound them tightly together had loosened with distance before fraying completely. 
Obi-Wan feels obligated to answer, though. “I’m still here. Right where you left me.” He says, softly, feeling his eyes sting. “I never left really, just tried to move on.” He tacks on after a moment. “You left. I let you go, and you bloomed far away.” His hand gestures absently at Anakin’s getup. Anakin makes an aborted move to speak, stopping as Obi-Wan lifts a palm, asking for silence. He needs to say this. “You’ve changed. It’s not bad, but you have. You’re not the Anakin Skywalker I knew, and I don’t think I’m really the Obi-Wan you knew.” The tear slips and falls, cleaving a warm trail down his face to his beard. He sniffs, wiping it away absently. “We’re not the same as we were before you left. This… rift, it is not your making or mine, it just happened over time. A product of it.”
“But I don’t want it to change!” Anakin protests loudly, voice raising. Even his voice has changed. It  is no longer just an outer rim accent, but it’s also mixed with the formal tinges of Coruscanti “I wish it wouldn’t.” His voice is a bit softer, but the vindication is still evident.
“And I wish I still knew you the way I did.” Obi-Wan agrees easily. The tears fall easily, mourning the man he’d known before, lost to the sands of time. He misses his Anakin like a limb cut off, but he knows better than to think it can still come back. He will take what the Force gives him and will accept what it takes.
“You do!” Anakin said, moving forwards slightly. "You do know me." Obi-Wan steps back and blink up at the perfectly coiffed hair and colourful intricate robes. “You do.” He repeats again, softer and less certain.
“Do I?” Obi-Wan inhales sharply, his chest hitching. The tears fall quite freely now, wamr trails sinking into his beard. He doesn't sob, it is not his way, but his hcest does rise in aborted sobs. “I don’t think I do.” He looks up at Anakin. “I knew you in one chapter of your life, Anakin, but now you are not him.” His face turns to the ground, hiding the fact that he’s desperately scrubbing at his face. “I miss him.” Obi-Wan admits readily, letting out a tired breath. “I miss the Anakin I used to know, but I’ve let him go. Long ago I watched him walk away forever. I know he’s not coming back.” He finishes softly, tiredly.
“Master…” Anakin doesn’t say anything. Anakin doesn’t sob, not anymore. HIs tears are silent little streaks of water glinting in the light as they fall down his face, still smooth like it was before. They take some time to compose themselves, Anakin bringing out a tissue to dab his eyes while Obi-Wan simply uses his robe sleeve. “I don’t think you changed. Not really. Already too old and set in your ways.” Anakin smiles grimly at Obi-Wan’s wet chuckle. “I think it’s just me.” Obi-Wan’s silence is almost an answer by itself. Obi-Wan’s silent sobs start disappearing, replaced by a numb, emptiness. He finally looks up at Anakin. “I just wish things were different. If I’d visited…” He trails off.
Obi-Wan shakes his head. “I don’t think that would have changed much.” He swallows, smiling softly. It juxtaposes the tears that still run freely down his cheeks. He mourns the Anakin that was a Jedi Knight, the Padawan who had eagerly asked him for answers to his infinite questions. This Senator Skywalker is little more than a stranger. The realisation hurts. “I’m sorry. For taking your time and all that.” The smile is hesitant, soft and unsure of how it will be received by his once-brother. 
“No, no. I’m sorry.” Anakin smiles, the response thawing Obi-Wan’s heart just a bit. Anakin looks down at his wrist, a hum going off. “Oh, Force, the time. I’m sorry, Obi-Wan, but I have to go.” 
“No worries. Just… stay safe, Senator.” Anakin nods in acquiescence before bowing respectfully and turning around. Obi-Wan watches him go, the sun lighting his back and, for the first time since Anakin left the Jedi, Obi-Wan does not exactly feel the rift between them grow as Anakin walks away.
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mneiai · 4 years
Text
Star Wars Drabble
"See your first Padawan there?" Qui-Gon joked beside him, studying the group of toddlers.
Here’s that Xanatos Time Travel AU I mentioned in an earlier post lol
AO3 Link
Everything hurt.
"Xan!"
Burning, he was burning.
"Xan! Please!"
There was a shift, a flurry of activity, and then he was lying down on cool grass, staring up at...at his mother's face.
"What...?"
She sobbed when he responded, clutching him and crying into his chest, and he looked around, taking in where they were, who was there.
He remembered this place. These people.
When he started to move, realizing the burning was not only gone, but that he felt better than he had in years, he couldn't help but notice how small he was.
How young.
A commotion to their side drew his attention to his father, charging through the small crowd of servants, a medic at his heels.
His father. His mother. His old home.
There was no Death, no afterlife. Which meant....
He had a lot of things to think about.
***
Xanatos froze, staring at the Youngling that had just started stumbling its way down the hallway behind the others. He didn't spend much time in the creche, having little love for the noise and mess, and he'd somehow managed to forget how much time has passed.
"See your first Padawan there?" Qui-Gon joked beside him, studying the group of toddlers.
He almost choked at the idea, felt Master Dooku shift beside him. When he'd come back, he'd decided to go about consolidating power differently. It had been less than a year before Qui-Gon found him and he decided that becoming a Jedi would still work out best. Leaving as a Knight would get him far less scrutiny and he'd retain some allies in the Order if he played things right. 1
When he returned to the Temple, it was to find he wasn't the only one that got this second chance. And what his Grandmaster had told him...well, they had much more to prepare themselves for, now.
"Xan?"
Sucking in a breath, he looked at his Master (who he was enjoying breaking much more slowly and precisely this time), then back at the little boy who would have been his greatest legacy.
The choice presented to him was just too good to resist.
"I...I think I have."
He walked forward, catching Obi-Wan's curious gaze, and the boy went willingly into his arms, snuggling into his hold as Xanatos projected comfort into the Force around them.
Master Dooku stepped up beside them, gently stroking the boy's hair. He'd told Xanatos much of his brother Padawan's tragic future, always tinged with the regret that Obi-Wan had never joined him. Unlike Feemor with his peasant family or the uncouth slave boy that Qui-Gon had wanted to replace all three of them with, Obi-Wan had been properly raised and even during their frenetic encounters, had rarely seemed less than civilized. It was no wonder Dooku had respected him over the dregs of the rest of his remaining lineage.
While Xanatos didn't know the adult Obi-Wan, he did remember him as a child. He remembered the way he worshipped Qui-Gon, the way he twisted himself around trying to become exactly what his Master wanted. He would have died just to have Qui-Gon's approval.
Xanatos wouldn't be as foolish as Qui-Gon, he would take full advantage of that. In his mind's eye, he could already imagine the General Kenobi that Dooku had told him of, loyal to Xanatos.
"Hello, little one," he murmured, stroking Obi-Wan's cheek. "I'll be your master someday soon."
****
He's surprised how much Obi-Wan has remained the same, without the crushing inferiority complex of a washed out Initiate weighing him down. Dooku had said the other version of him had been the ideal Jedi--the sort who would never Fall, who could fight superior opponents and win from skill not power, selfless and self-sacrificing. Xanatos had assumed most of that came from childhood abuse.
But in this timeline, Obi-Wan was one of the few Initiates who grew knowing they already had a Master and became a Padawan at the earliest age to a well-regarded, dashing Knight. A Master who visited often during his time in the creche and had no problem getting any bullies to back off (and if some of them were punished in ways that the Jedi would never know of, well, that was a master's perogative). And yet Obi-Wan still seemed to disbelieve just how good at all the Jedi business he was.
Xanatos thought maybe he was incapable of seeing such truths, since he thought Xanatos was an amazing Jedi and Xanatos was a Sith pretending to be a Jedi.
Or, at least, as much of a Sith as someone could get, completely removed from Bane's line and learning in secret as he and Dooku were.
Still, there was something so...flattering about his regard that Xanatos found himself trying to live up to it when he could. Helping people he would have ignored, biting back criticism at the non-humans, only snarking slightly at the uneducated and foolish. Pretending he thought these backwater planets deserved Jedi helping them.
He was still, of course, destroying Qui-Gon's mind and soul little by little behind Dooku's back. And running some companies from the shadows that no version of Obi-Wan would ever approve of. And plotting the downfall of both the other Sith and the Jedi.
But he had some time to waste, all of his plans too long-term, enough that he could be kind to strangers in return for Obi-Wan's bright smiles. Could go out of mission parameters to help more just to overhear Obi-Wan talking in awed tones about him to his peers.
Xanatos could understand why Yoda thought Obi-Wan could save Qui-Gon from himself in the last life. He also found Qui-Gon even more pathetic for not realizing what sort of treasure he'd had.
****
"Stop! Please!"
Xanatos stared in horror as his Padawan--who was supposed to stay safe on the ship--threw himself into the battlefield, his lightsaber lit...and catching Master Dooku's blade before it could strike down another Mandalorian.
The blade shut off an instant later, Dooku hurriedly stepping back as if to show he was no threat.
Obi-Wan was thirteen, tiny, and still so soft-hearted that Xanatos thought it might be an affect of his very soul, not just his upbringing. He shouldn't have been anywhere near Galidraan, especially after he and Dooku had decided it should go similar to the last time to keep Mandalore destabilized, but the Council had foolishly thrown him into the mission.
And he must have felt the death and pain from all the way back at the ship. He looked like he'd run the entire way, breathing hard but so sure of himself.
"What are you doing?! We're peacekeepers, not--not murderers!"
A few of the Knights had already turned off their sabers, horror echoing around them like they'd only just realized what they were doing. The Mandalorians were using the distraction to regroup, huddling together and trying to save some of their injured. Many of their blasters were still pointed at the Jedi, but none anywhere near Obi-Wan.
"Get out of the way, brat!" Vosa started, actually looking like she planned to attack the Padawan.
That Dooku had ever thought he could raise her differently still baffled Xanatos.
"Adiik," a Mandalorian shifted towards Obi-Wan, others following, as though they could defend him.
And then Xanatos finally moved, fury flushing through him and making it so, so hard to conceal his Darker nature. "Don't even think about it, Vosa."
He stood next to and a little in front of Obi-Wan, now, facing down his Master's sister Padawan, unintentionally defending the Mandalorians. Any doubts about his actions he had were banished when Obi-Wan's free hand gripped his robe, their bond shivering with his Padawan's adoration.
She scoffed. "Your attachment to the boy is clouding your senses."
"Your anger and fear are making yours questionable," he shot back, knowing the others would understand he was accusing her of near-Falling.
Before she could defend herself, Dooku gripped her arm, forcing it down. Xanatos met his eyes, trying to convey the new plan in just a few looks. Obi-Wan, from what he'd heard, had some Force-driven connection to Mandalore in the last life, and now he'd have the remains of the True Mandalorians owing him their lives. It couldn't be a coincidence.
***
Xanatos didn't normally approve of most of his Padawan's friends, he'd done his best over the years to isolate him more and more, making sure he was too busy to spend time with them, to distracted even to send them messages. His Padawan should be solely focused on him.
But Vos...had his uses. The Council was biding its time, waiting for him to Fall, and from what Dooku had said it would happen. And Vos came with Tholme, having a Shadow see Xanatos as an ally could never hurt.
So, Obi-Wan was allowed one friend, for all the headaches their exploits gave Xanatos. Two too-angry boys that no one would have wanted if they hadn't been chosen by Masters so young. Who would, as much as their exposure to Xanatos and Dooku, help guide each other to the Dark.
***
Dooku and he had been preparing for this moment perhaps more than any other. Too much hinged on one person and they'd gone back and forth for ages trying to decide if one of them wouldn't just take a detour and kill the kid.
Yet here they were, watching Qui-Gon twist himself into knots trying to get the Council to accept a nine year old as his Padawan.
Qui-Gon had asked Xanatos to watch the boy while he spoke with them (and Dooku, of course, was on the Council now, so he couldn't do it). Normally, even if Obi-Wan was newly Knighted and not technically under Xanatos' authority anymore he would have given the task to him.
But not for this child.
He did a good job at playing innocent, an even better job at hiding his Darkness behind a blinding amount of Force. But Xanatos now had his confirmation about what it was that meant just he and his Grandmaster had been brought back before.
Falling.
"Xan? I brought--oh, hello." Obi-Wan, with his impeccably annoying timing, walked into Xanatos' rooms to find him and Skywalker staring at each other.
Before Xanatos could decide on a reaction, Skywalker was moving, giving Obi-Wan a bright, adorable smile and trying to help him with the containers of food he'd brought. Qui-Gon must have told him at some point and now Obi-Wan, aware of how little Xanatos liked children, thought he was helping his Master.
"Hi! I'm Anakin!"
Obi-Wan smiled softly and introduced himself, keeping up a pleasant conversation with this boy he thought would be part of his grandmaster's lineage. He already seemed charmed.
As if sensing just how much Xanatos was seething at watching the young man who always put him first focused on some brat, Skywalker spared a moment when Obi-Wan's back was turned to give Xanatos a truly cruel smirk. It was chilling on a child and made him hesitate from interfering, not sure how Skywalker would react.
When Obi-Wan finally had to go to one of the classes he was an assistant instructor for, they were alone again. Xanatos was exhausted from keeping himself from driving his lightsaber through to the little monster's heart. And his frustration that his former Padawan just did not notice, thought Skywalker was adorable.
"They're going to make me an Initiate," Skywalker stated, cruel eyes locking on Xanatos again. "And I'm going to be Obi-Wan's Padawan."
"I didn't think that worked out so well for you, last time."
Choking, he was choking, just for a moment, just as a warning. He didn't even feel the Dark except right around his neck. What was this creature?
"He was my Padawan, not Qui-Gon's. You won't find him such a pushover."
"He's mine. He'll always be." Skywalker's face was twisted and ugly, his hands clenching at his sides.
Xanatos gritted his teeth, knowing he didn't want to upset Skywalker too much. He would just have to make sure Obi-Wan took someone else as a Padawan, first. Assuming the boy wouldn't kill them. Which...Dooku had said part of the plan Sidious had for Skywalker's Fall involved slaughtering the whole creche.
"There are plans in place, Dooku and I have spent decades--"
"I don't care what your ineffectual plans are, I know exactly what needs to be done. Either you help me or you're standing in my way. You don't want me as your enemy."
Despite the threat coming from a nine year old, Xanatos knew the words were true.
XXXXXXXXX
Basically, the disaster lineage members who Fell are the ones who get sent back in time, to just a little before they're taken by the Jedi.
Anakin is still dark here because like two seconds of doing something good because his kid is otherwise going to die after like twenty years of committing genocide and shit isn't really the same thing as a true redemption lbh And I guess you could say this assumes Force ghosts don't exist or something like that lol
Quinlan included in this because you're all freaking obsessed with him lol
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spell-cleaver · 4 years
Note
“I read about a general who was close to my mother during the Clone Wars... General Kenobi. Just maybe.. Do you think he could be my father?”
Previous parts on the masterpost here!
“I read about a general who was close to my mother during the Clone Wars... General Kenobi. Just maybe.. Do you think he could be my father?”
Luke watched Nova's reaction to that news carefully—very carefully. Namely because the moment he suggested it, she choked on her own tongue.
"What?" she asked, then composed herself. Forcibly. "I don't know where you could've possibly got that idea."
Luke crossed his arms, leaned back against the sofa and scowled. "I just explained to you my logic—is he my birth father or not?"
Nova was still struggling to speak, her mouth working fiercely, though no sound came out. She fixed her gaze resolutely on one of the Noghri guards, just over Luke's shoulder, and mouthed something at him.
"He is not," she finally said, decisively and clearly. "General Kenobi was a hero of the Naboo—he and his master, Qui-Gon Jinn, fought to liberate Naboo during the Trade Federation's invasion, and he worked closely with your mother then. I suspect she might have had a slight crush on him at the time, even, but..." She snorted. "He was most certainly not your father, little emperor."
"Do you know who my father was, then?" Luke pressed. Nova cleared her throat.
"I always had heavy suspicions—there was one Jedi whom she was particularly... fond of," she hedged. Luke could sense the part-lie, and frowned. She smiled when she saw that, leaning forwards to run her thumb over his cheek. It distracted him, as it was meant to do; he did not notice as the Noghri guard slipped out to find Lord Vader. "But I was the keeper of her secrets, and I wasn't about to tell anyone my suspicions."
Luke narrowed his eyes. "Including me?"
"They're only suspicions, Luke." Lie. She was getting more nervous now, gaze flickering to the door. "I don't want to—"
"I understand," Luke said.
She blinked, but regained her composure almost instantly, and smiled. "I'm glad. I... don't want to implant any false ideas in your head."
"I understand," Luke repeated. Had he hit the nail on the head? He'd been so certain that Kenobi was his father, and she was so adamant that he wasn't, but this was...
Suspicious...
The door flung open and Vader strode in. Luke jerked upright in his seat, and shot Nova a look. She smiled at him in a way that was both reassuring and grim.
"Why did you summon me?" Vader asked of Luke, but it was Nova who spoke.
"Luke asked a question about his father, and I just wanted to ensure that there were two people he could hear the answer from, instead of just me," she said smoothly. Vader tensed. "He was looking through some of the old Jedi records, and found references to one Obi-Wan Kenobi." Vader tensed even further at that. "Help me convince him that Kenobi was not his father—I'm not sure he believes me alone."
She smiled wryly at Luke. Luke scowled at her.
Vader growled, "Kenobi," and stalked forwards, "was certainly not your father."
Luke raised his eyebrows up at Vader, but he wasn't finished.
"He was a traitor and a fool—one of the Jedi Order's greatest failures. He never deserved anything he got in life except his fall."
"You hated him?"
"I despised him."
But if Luke wasn't mistaken—and if watching too much Crown of Stars had told him anything—then that level of hatred could only come from love. If Vader was so disgusted, so panicked by the idea of Luke thinking, realising, this...
Whoever, Luke's father was, Vader had insulted and derided him before. Claimed he didn't love him. He'd also made it clear that he had loved both of Luke's parents... once upon a time...
Perhaps Luke's guess wasn't as far off as they wanted him to think.
He sighed. "Alright then," he conceded dramatically, letting himself seem dejected. Letting himself seem beaten down. "But can't you tell me who he actually was?"
"He was nobody," Vader answered immediately. Nova shot him a glare for some reason—and another, more urging look—but he said nothing more.
"Alright." Luke didn't bother masking his disappointment at still having secrets kept from him, but clearly, he wasn't getting anything from them here. He trusted Nova, he knew she wouldn't be keeping the truth from him if it wasn't for good reason, but...
It hurt. He wanted to know.
"On the topic of Jedi," Nova said, straightening up and putting her hands on her knees. "Luke, we still need to address the matter of your training."
Luke's gaze snapped up. "I am not—"
"You're not training with Vader. That's confirmed. We all know that." She nodded. Vader... nodded as well, more slowly. "But if the worst comes to the worst, being trained to defend yourself, defend your mind, would help greatly. And..."
Luke closed his eyes as he put the pieces together. "You want me to learn from a Jedi?"
"It is a foolish idea," Vader cut in.
"You, shut up. Of course you don't like it." Nova turned back to Luke. "And I know you probably don't like it either, but—"
"Jedi are evil." Nova flinched."Fat— Palpatine always said—"
"Palpatine said it," she said quietly. "Exactly. Do you not want to—"
"Overturn everything the Empire is based on?" Luke shot to his feet. "No! The Jedi are enemies of the Empire, how do I know they won't kill me, or— or—"
"Because I know this person. She kept me alive after I was chased out of the Palace. She taught me how to shield my mind so that I could look after you." Nova brushed Luke's cheek again, brushed a lock of his hair behind his ear. "She was a close friend of your mother's. And technically," she smiled a little, "she's not even a Jedi."
Vader stiffened. "If you are sending for who I think you are..."
"You know that she will not hurt Luke."
"I know that she will not be pleased to see me."
"On the contrary. She's been wanting to have a chat with you for years. She'd certainly be happier to see you than anyone else would."
Luke looked left, then right. "Who?" he echoed. "Who is this?"
"You'll meet her soon," Nova said. "I've already contacted the person who will get me in contact with her—but she might not want to come. Or she might not be able to come. And the other candidates are less than ideal, but... you need them, Luke. And you will be safe, with them. I promise."
He looked her deep in the eye, blinked away a few tears, then nodded. "Alright. Alright, I'll... give it a try."
"Good." She squeezed his hands, then there was a chiming sound. When she glanced at her comm, she got to her feet immediately. "I have to go," she said. "That's the person I contacted, getting back to me. I'll tell you what he says." She smiled. "It'll be good, Luke."
"I trust you," he said.
She left, folded her dark red skirts around her as she did.
The moment she was gone, Luke turned to Vader and demanded, "What do you think of this?"
Vader crossed his arms. "You know that I dislike it, Majesty."
"Little wonder." Luke gritted his teeth. "And even you won't tell me my father's name?"
"Your father was nothing. I told you. He did not deserve your mother and he certainly did not deserve you."
Luke stared at him... and he realised.
Vader hated everything. Everyone.
Did he hate himself as well?
And if he did, if he was so adamant that Luke speak no more of Obi-Wan Kenobi, of a Jedi who was never reported dead and who vanished around the start of the Empire, when Vader appeared...
Luke narrowed his eyes.
Send me the first sentence of a scene from this AU and I’ll continue it!
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darling-i-read-it · 4 years
Text
Thoughts On Being A Jedi
Obi-Wan Kenobi x reader
Word Count: 1.7k
Warnings: insinuated smut
Author’s Note: DUDE!!! I had wayyyy to much fun writing this lol. So much fun. I love writing for obi-wan thanks my love for requesting it
Requested: by @ateliefloresdaprimavera aaaand now I can't stop thinking on an AU where,instead of Anakin being his padawan, YN is. She's not much younger than him,but because of her age,Qui Gon Jinn sees something in her as well, and (he lives this time) goes to train Anankin,and Obi goes to train yn, and the rest is romantic history!
Summary: the request!!
Genre: flufffyyy
Song:
(not my gif)
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You never planned on being a Jedi. You never thought you were good enough, living on a planet that nobody ever gave a second thought about. It wasn’t until Obi-Wan Kenobi and his master, Qui Gon Jinn came to your planet. You were friends with a young boy named Anakin and when they seemed to take a liking to him, you had jumped along for the ride. You were only about two years younger than Obi-Wan but you were fascinated by him. The Jedi ways.
You would be lying if you said you weren’t attracted to him. You knew enough about the Jedi to know he was never allowed to marry. That didn’t stop you from liking him. He was handsome and brave and a good man. You looked up to him and you loved him. For better or worse.
“Y/N have you ever wanted to be a Jedi?” Anakin asked you one day as you sat on the stairs of his home. There was discussion of bringing Anakin back with the Jedi, way far away. You thought about his question and looked at Obi-Wan who was talking with the woman they had come with. Padme you think was her name. You leaned back to ignore whatever conversation they were having, attempting to ignore the creeping jealousy in your chest.
“I’ve never thought I could. Looks like you might get a shot though,” you said with a smile. He nodded, his face flushed.
“I want you and my mom to come though. It’d be so lonely without you,” he explained. You shrugged. There was nothing special about you. Your idea was that you would never see your little friend again but you didn’t tell him that. He should be excited about his new found talent, not worried about you.
“Well I guess you can ask Obi-Wan,” you teased and stood up. You brushed dust off your clothes and put your hands on your hips. Your eyes caught Anakin as he watched you.
“You like him don’t you?” he inquired. You shook your head but there was no denying the flustered look on your face.
“He's a Jedi Ani. It would never happen anyway,” you said brushing him off. As if on cue, the padawan approached you and Anakin, a smile gracing his face. You returned it, leaning against the dusty brick wall beside you.
“We were just talking about you!” Anakin exclaimed. You shot him a glare. Obi-Wan only chuckled.
“All good things I hope?”
“There’s not a bad thing she can say about you,” Anakin pointed out and you swatted his hair. It caused a good laugh from the both of them.
“You’ll make a wonderful Jedi one day is all,” you explained. He nodded but Anakin was still giving him a mischievous eye.
“Have you ever thought about being a Jedi Y/N?” he inquired. You smiled at the strikingly similar question as the one you had just been asked.
“Thought about it sure. But only because I like the color,” you teased grabbing his lightsaber from his side. He gave you a stern look but you just moved it around without opening it, making the sound affect.
Anakin laughed as you mimicked cutting off Obi-Wan's head dramatically. He smiled, a big toothy grin. At the time, you didn’t know him that well but a grin like that was pretty rare. You smiled back at him and handed the lightsaber over.
“That wasn’t bad form you know,” he pointed out. You shrugged.
“Your form is pretty good too,” you said. You both blushed and only Anakin saw it.
It was just before the fight with Maul that anyone brought up the fact that you had tagged along. As Obi-Wan defeated the villain with the help of his Master, you were amazed that they made it out alive. You ran over to them, flanked by Anakin. The two of you checked the Jedis over for injury, exclaiming your amazement and wonder about their feat. You clinged to Obi-Wan, your worry for his life not quite gone.
It was after his near death experience that Qui Gonn voiced his opinion on you and your tiny friend.
“Y/N have you ever thought about being a Jedi?” You peeled away from Obi-Wan and you, him and Anakin chuckled. You had been asked that question many times now. Only then did you give a serious answer.
“Yeah. I have.” Obi-Wan's touch lingered on your shoulder and you were all to aware of it.
“Would you like to train to be one?” That was a question you hadn’t been expecting. You wanted desperately to leave your little home and get out there. This seemed like a perfect escape.
You’d be lying if you said that the fact you would get to see Obi-Wan every once in a while didn’t influence your answer.
“I’d love too,” you exlaimed with a grin. Qui Gonn smiled, glancing between Obi-Wan and you. He was all too aware of his padawans crush on you. While that wasn’t ideal in a situation like this, he knew that if he were to offer you a position it would have to be with Obi. There was no keeping you apart once you realized the feelings were mutual.
“Obi-Wan will train you. I will train Anakin,” he stated. Your mouth opened a little in surprise and your eyes found Obi-Wans. He gave you a grin and raised his hands to your cheeks. For a moment you thought he was going to kiss you. He did it out of sheer autopilot. Qui Gonn was distracted by Anakin and chose to ignore the situation behind him.
Obi pulled away and stepped back.
“I’m glad you’re my master,” you breathed. The rush of his lips almost being on yours was too much to handle.
“Yes me too. We’ll have a lot of fun,” he stated. You turned away from each other.
It took precisely two training sessions before you kissed for real.
You were being taught Jedi history, lore. You wouldn’t quite call it a training session but you were having plenty of fun listening to Obi-Wan speak. You sat across from each other on your new bed. It had all been provided from you when you arrived. Such a stark difference from the home you had had only a week prior.
“There was this huge fight. Everyone still talks about. It’s the stuff of legend Y/N,” he explained. You nodded, chin resting on your palm.
“I’m sure they do. Everyone I’ve met here is very boring,” you joked. He rolled his eyes and you leaned back on the bed. It was quite an informal practice, being there. But it seemed to build up to something and you were far from complaining.
“Do you like your new room?” he asked, leaning above you. He looked out your large window at the small balcony and stars above the city. You sat up and nodded.
“I love it. Everything about it. Except that it’s attached to your room. Who let that happen!?” You got up and walked to the balcony.
“I’m your master!” The word still felt odd to say to him. He was getting used to being on the other side of the training and lessons.
You placed your elbows on the balcony awning, looking at the stars above you. He followed close beside you.
“My master,” you said a smile dancing on your lips. “You’re just Obi-Wan,” you promised. He looked at you, eyes catching yours. It was a perfect moment. He would have had to have been a special kind of man not to kiss you in that moment.
He was not that kind of man.
Your heart skipped a beat and you let him touch you, a hand on the small of your back and the other on your face. There was no denying this. There was no denying your feelings.
You pulled away, breathless. You looked at his beautiful eyes and smiled.
“Do you remember when you told me my form was good?” he asked. You squinted at him, recalling the memory with a find gaze.
“Yes…”
“You didn’t mean my fighting form did you.” You chuckled and shook your head, breaking his gaze but then regaining it.
“Obviously not.”
He hummed a smile and kissed you again. You grabbed him by the robes and dragged him back to your room.
“I picked out the sheets,” he muttered against your lips and in between hasty kisses. You smiled, your figure against his as close as they could get as you stumbled around.
“With this in mind?” He shrugged, both calloused hands cupping your face now.
“It may have been in the back of my mind.”
The next day you walked beside Anakin, Qui Gonn and your new lover.
“How are Y/N’s studies going?” Qui Gonn asked. You brushed the hidden marks left on your stomach. Obi-Wan stumbled on his words.
“She’s doing very good,” he finally managed.
“Is she pleasing you?” he asked. You choked on your saliva and Obi-Wan pushed you forward with a hand on your back.
“She is pleasing my standards for her training.” You rolled your eyes and continues forward. As you reached a sparring room, Qui Gonn and Anakin stopped, said their goodbyes and let the two of you move to the next one.
You jumped together, his arm on your back still and your head leaning back, laughing.
Qui Gonn let out a sigh and looked at his new padawan.
“I told you he loved her too,” he voiced. Anakin nodded.
“I apologize master. I never should have doubted you.”
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jasontoddiefor · 4 years
Text
Remember that AU in which Anakin is a single father in witness protection after turning on his boss and falls in love with Obi-Wan? Here’s more. Read on AO3!
“What the hell are you doing here?”
Anakin thought he wasn’t seeing correctly when he stared into the face of Dooku Serenno. Anakin had met the man plenty of times in the past, in the part of his past he thought he could l finally leave behind and forget, more or less at least. He couldn’t believe it. Everything had been going great lately. He had gotten a part-time job to keep busy when the twins were gone and the FBI wasn’t breathing down his neck, the twins had adjusted wonderfully to Kindergarten and had made plenty of friends, and Anakin had a boyfriend.
An absolutely perfect man miles out of his league whom he didn’t deserve and still stayed with him. Obi-Wan was too good to be true sometimes. He was caring and thoughtful with his every gesture, adored the twins and never even minded it when they talked about Padmé. Anakin hadn’t even thought about dating again before meeting him, his status making it more than difficult, and even without that – Anakin loved Padmé. He couldn’t imagine not being in love with her and had always assumed that immediately would deter anybody who could see past the whole single-father of twins and yet Obi-Wan never even looked jealous. If anything, he encouraged the twins to speak of their mother.
Anakin had known that he fell hard and fast for people, but the thought of Obi-Wan someday not being there had already become unbearable.
And now he was staring at Dooku.
Dooku, who knew all the blood that stained Anakin’s hands, who had seen him at his worst and walked through the aftermaths of one of Vader’s infamous tantrums. The fragile peace Anakin had found was threatening to fall apart just because of his presence.
“I believe should be asking you that,” Dooku spoke up icily. “What are you doing here, Vader? What do you want from my grandson?”
“Grandson?” Anakin echoed. Right. Dinner with Obi-Wan’s family of which Dooku was a part. Anakin couldn’t see any resemblance between Obi-Wan and Dooku – but Obi-Wan had said that he was adopted. And yet, still-
Still – how could somebody as good as Obi-Wan come from the same family as Dooku. The bastard was to blame that Sidious had gotten away with as many of his crimes as he had. Sure, Sidious had also threatened him, but the man had been stupid enough to help Sheev Palpatine once. He should have known what it would lead to. The only reason Anakin hadn’t mentioned any of that to the agents holding his leash was simply that there were more important people to worry about than the lawyers Sidious had made use of. His enforcers were much more dangerous and more likely to kill you.
“I didn’t know about this,” Anakin continued.
Dooku rolled his eyes. “Obviously… But neither did I. I thought you were dead.”
“I am,” Anakin hissed. “Vader-” Anakin paused to look around as if anybody could overhear him. It was stupid, but he had just walked into the guy who was the reason he was short an arm. He figured he could allow himself some paranoia. “Vader died four years ago and I do not plan on resurrecting him.”
“So you will just content yourself with bringing your enemies down on my family?”
Anakin felt his rage begin to boil up. That was absolutely not the case. He had done everything he could to ensure his family was safe and that nobody near him would ever learn of the secrets he was hiding.
“I didn’t-“
“Daddy, daddy!”
The door was ripped open again and Luke was staring at Anakin with wide eyes, utterly excited. “Daddy, Obi-Wan’s daddy is even taller than you!”
“Oh?” Anakin crouched down in front of his son, keenly avoiding looking ta Dooku. He knew that if he did so now, he would lose all his calm. He needed to get away from this situation for a moment.
He never should have invited Obi-Wan over, never should have spoken to him-
“That’s impossible, sweetheart,” Anakin said seriously. “Are you sure?”
“Yes!” Luke shouted and took Anakin’s hand to pull him inside. “Daddy, you have to come see.”
Glancing back at Dooku, Anakin allowed himself to be dragged away by his son. He made a gesture that hopefully conveyed that Dooku should shut his mouth and focused on Luke instead.
Luke led him into the living room. It was small but cozy and half the dishes were already put on the table. The food looked amazing, much more extravagant than anything Anakin was used to for homemade dinners and his and Obi-Wan’s dates had all been homemade dinners because Anakin was a paranoid bastard who didn’t want to leave the twins home alone with a babysitter.
Anakin kind of wanted to throw up.
This was so normal.
He couldn’t remember the last time he had done that-
No, he could. Over five years ago, in those last months of Padmé’s pregnancy when they had thought they had escaped Sidious and were just happy together. They had eaten breakfast in bed and cooked together and wondered how they would handle all this with a child as neither had been particularly used to running a household on their own. They had tried to figure out what house to buy and how to paint the nursery-
“So you’re Anakin Lars, yes?”
The man Luke had led him to was indeed taller than Anakin, though not by that much. He had long hair, pulled back into a ponytail, and a kind smile. He seemed like a nice man, utterly unbothered by Leia sitting on his shoulders and braiding his hair.
“Yes, Sir,” Anakin said.
That was how you still introduced yourself to your partner’s parent, wasn’t it? Anakin wasn’t slipping back into yes, master, no, master, I will try, master-
“It’s nice to meet you Anakin,” Qui-Gon said warmly. “And no need to call me Sir, please. I’ve been waiting to meet you. Your twins have already had a lot to say about you.”
“Ah yes. They talk a lot,” Anakin said lamely. Could this situation get even anymore out of control?
“Honestly, Father,” Qui-Gon then sighed and looked past Anakin to where Dooku must be standing. “What have you told this poor boy? He looks like we’re going to eat him alive.”
“I have done nothing-“
“We used to work together,” Anakin quickly intervened. “I gave Dooku’s company a hand when it came to their cybersecurity and somebody still managed to get to Dooku. Don’t think he’ll ever forgive me for that one. It was a huge loss, wasn’t it?”
“Yes,” Dooku gritted out in-between shut teeth. “Tremendously.”
“Is that work I hear?”
A new man entered the living room from the kitchen it looked like. His black hair was a mess and he mustered the group in front of him with interested eyes. This must be Xanatos then, Obi-Wan’s other brother.
“I thought we said no work talk,” Xanatos continued and then held his hand out to Anakin. “Nice to meet the guy who made my brother act like a schoolgirl with a crush. I’m Xanatos.”
Anakin took his hand. “Anakin.” Vader, Vader, Vader. “Lars. Niece to meet you. Obi-Wan has told me a lot about you.”
“All good only, I hope?” Xanatos asked with a smirk that was borderline flirtatious.
“Stop flirting with my boyfriend!” Obi-Wan then shouted from the kitchen as well and moments later walked inside with a couple of bowls in hand. “Please just ignore him, Anakin. He’s an idiot. Qui-Gon dropped him too much on the head as a child.”
“Hahaha, very funny,” Xanatos replied and then finally sat down in his cha. “I was a teenager already when Qui-Gon got stuck with me. You, however, itty-bitty Oafy-Wan-“
“Boys,” Qui-Gon’s voice rang out. He sounded a little tired, this arguing must happen more often then. Anakin only hoped that Luke and Leia wouldn’t turn out like that. “I apologize Anakin. I fear you get to see all of Obi-Wan’s bad sides today. The of them are not as well behaved as your children.”
Qui-Gon looked up to Leia who was content sitting on his shoulders and smiled. “You are a little princess, aren’t you, Miss Leia?”
“Yeah!” Leia agreed. “And when I grow up, I’m going to be president.”
“I will be a knight,” Luke spoke up. “And I’ll save daddy from all the bad guys.”
Anakin smiled slightly. If he had something to say about it, his son very much would not ever even see one of the ghosts haunting Anakin.
“Don’t worry, I can take care of myself.” Anakin shot Dooku a meaningful look. They could settle this later, but he wouldn’t ruin this evening for Obi-Wan.
“And what is that smell? I would give an arm and a leg for that dish.”
The twins, long used to his jokes, still giggled while Obi-Wan only rolled his eyes, Qui-Gon and Xanatos looked confused and Dooku-
Dooku was pale.
Was it- No. It couldn’t be but-
Well, Perhaps the tyrannical lawyer was feeling a little guilty about Anakin’s predicament.
Oh.
Oh, this could be fun.
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glimmerglanger · 4 years
Note
What is Mirror!Obi-Wan’s backstory? We saw some little hints about Jinn, but I’d love to know more! Also, how did Anakin find out about it all? Is it widely known, or did Obi-Wan tell him? I love your mirror au and basically all your fics!! ♥️
1) I have to wonder about Jinn in your Mirror!AU. I've tried moving on but I can't. How bad was he in the Mirror Universe! Is Prime!Anikin worried about what he heard from Mirror Obi-Wan? I mean Obi-Wan seemed surprised by Shadow Anikin's hatred, so maybe cannon Qui-Gon wasn't so bad? But the characters really don't seem that different between worlds, just the world around them has shaped their decisions. So maybe he was that bad? I don't think so, I hope not... BUT I DON'T KNOW - 
2) Will we be getting any more details on either Qui-Gon and his relationship with Obi-Wan? I'm scared. Since it was so vague in Through A Glass Darkly, it's totally valid if you want to keep it a vague shadow of the past. But if I have one burning question that I want to find out, does cannon Anakin ask Obi-Wan about it? Does Obi-Wan tell the truth whatever it may be or does he move on, because the past is the past. I'm worried about Obi-Wan and his avoiding tendencies and I know Anakin is too.
SO GENERAL TRIGGER WARNINGS FOR THIS ASK. Implied child abuse (of all kinds) etc, nothing at all specific. Implications only and vague ones at that. BUT STILL. Avoid as necessary. I’ll be putting the whole thing under a read more, too. There IS a ficlet under here.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You may rest easier, second anon, regarding canon!Qui-Gon. He was probably responsible for leaving Obi-Wan with a fair amount of issues, but didn’t put Prime!IObi-Wan through what Mirror!Obi-Wan experienced. It’s more like agaptfaa, where there’s that One Weird/Bad Thing That Happened That They Don’t Talk About. I think Prime!Anakin does ask about it, but Prime!Obi-Wan is just confused. That said, Mirror!Jinn was.... pretty bad. And.... first anon, I have a fic for you:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Qui-Gon Jinn was not the first man who died in front of Anakin. Tatooine was a brutal world, out on the edges of the Empire, unconquered in Anakin’s youth. He led the armies that brought it to heel as a young man - delivered Watto’s head to his mouth as a gift - but that was later.
As a boy, he had been a slave. As a boy, he’d seen all the worst things the galaxy had to offer, experiencing some of them, when his mother had not been able to protect him, despite all her best efforts.
He might have experienced worse, had thought he would, with a large hand curled around his shoulder and a presence in the Force pressing at his mind, choking and terrible and--
And Qui-Gon Jinn was not the first man who died in front of Anakin, slumping down and to the side around a bloody red lightsaber blade. But he was the first that left Anakin feeling sickly relieved, dizzily grateful to the man standing before him.
The man had glowing golden eyes and copper hair and he said, “It’s alright, no one will hurt you. I’ll make sure of it.”
And Anakin believed him.
#
The first time Anakin wanted to kill a man was years later. Obi-Wan was as good as his word. He ever was, Anakin came to learn over the years. No one hurt him.
Anakin sometimes experienced pain, anyway. Over the coming years, he would occasionally wake up terrified and not sure why, phantom remnants of pain drifting across his skin. He didn’t realize the cause until he went looking for Obi-Wan - they did not share a room, not like so many others at the Temple - and found him retching into the toilet.
He flinched when Anakin touched his shoulder, looking up with wide eyes, all the emotions on his face tucked away quickly. He’d only shook his head when Anakin asked him what was wrong, sending Anakin back to his quarters to sleep.
Anakin had never had a bond with anyone before. He had not known that emotions might slip across it, not until he asked questions the next day. The Emperor was always happy to tell him things, no matter what he asked, and so he came to understand that the nightmares creeping through his mind were not his own.
And he came to understand exactly what they were about.
The Emperor stroked his hair, after explaining, and said, “He’s always been weak, you see. Soft. Everyone would understand, if you wished someone else to train you.” 
Anakin thought of Obi-Wan, the blood slicking down his face and the saber in his hand. He thought of the things Palpatine had told him, scowling, something angry and hot curling in his gut and up his spine, even as he moved away from Palpatine’s hand.
He was already thirteen, almost a man grown himself, and he disliked being touched like a pet. He was already thirteen, and had been beginning to wonder about certain… things, certain desires, that all felt twisted and wrong, after the things Palpatine had said to him.
He was glad, suddenly and fiercely, that Jinn was dead, wished only that he’d been the one to do it. Anakin said, “No. Definitely not.” It seemed fair to him that, if Obi-Wan was going to make sure no one hurt him, he ought to do the same.
#
The first time Anakin took a life without orders to do so, it was in the halls of the palace. Years had passed since his conversation with Palpatine, but he’d not forgotten. It was strange, the way it happened. He’d been in a delighted mood; he’d had Obi-Wan held close, backed against a wall so Anakin could taste the skin of his neck, and--
And an amused voice had interrupted them, a man had said, “Finally old enough to take over for his old Master, I see.”
Obi-Wan went very still, so still he could have been a statue or a corpse, eyes going curiously blank. The warmth of his emotions, previously curled so pleasantly around Anakin’s thoughts, turned cool and flat, retreating like a wave away from the shore.
The words had the opposite effect on Anakin. He turned, anger flaring hot and impossible down his spine, reaching a hand out and he didn’t even realize, truly, what he’d done until the man - a representative for one of the worlds of the Empire, someone important - was crumpled against the floor, no longer moving.
Anakin stood a few steps away, panting, fists clenching and unclenching, tasting bile in the back of his mouth and he had killed people before - more than he could count, really - but he’d never…
Never felt so satisfied about it.
“Anakin?” Obi-Wan asked, quietly, from behind him, and this would… get Anakin in trouble, most likely. They weren’t supposed to just - just murder representatives from Emperial worlds. That kind of thing was frowned upon, generally. 
“Why did…?” Obi-Wan took a step forward, eyes on the dead man, still feeling so distant in the Force. “What were you thinking, you--”
“I’m not him,” Anakin cut in, the anger in his mind burning off enough for him to recognize it’s source. He’d thought about it, more than once, but he wasn’t - he wasn’t the same. “I wouldn’t ever…” He jerked a hand out to the side. 
Obi-Wan shifted to look at him, but his gaze was distant, his eyes unfocused. “You know,” he said, quietly.
“Yes.” Anakin had known, known the first time he slipped into Obi-Wan’s bunk, known the first time they’d touched with any kind of intention behind it, known for years. “And I’m not him.” 
Obi-Wan blinked as a pair of guards stepped around the corner. They’d spot the body. Anakin wasn’t sure, entirely, what they’d do about it. He wasn’t sure he cared. Not when Obi-Wan nodded and said, “I know.”
And Anakin had a jarring moment of realizing that he’d happily slaughter everyone else inside the Palace’s walls, as long as it meant no one made Obi-Wan feel cold and hurt and afraid, ever again. He shivered, the realization barely having time to settle before the guards were there, before Anakin found that he was to be punished, before he realized what that would entail, before he watched Obi-Wan writhe under the Emperor’s Force lightning and--
And Anakin swore so many promises to himself that day. It would be more long years before he managed to keep them all.
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starwarsfic · 4 years
Text
I.14
Originally posted July 28, 2020
Summary: "See your first Padawan there?" Qui-Gon joked beside him, studying the group of toddlers.
Details: Dark disaster lineage time travel AU.
xxxxxx
Everything hurt.
"Xan!"
Burning, he was burning.
"Xan! Please!"
There was a shift, a flurry of activity, and then he was lying down on cool grass, staring up at...at his mother's face.
"What...?"
She sobbed when he responded, clutching him and crying into his chest, and he looked around, taking in where they were, who was there.
He remembered this place. These people.
When he started to move, realizing the burning was not only gone, but that he felt better than he had in years, he couldn't help but notice how small he was.
How young.
A commotion to their side drew his attention to his father, charging through the small crowd of servants, a medic at his heels.
His father. His mother. His old home.
There was no Death, no afterlife. Which meant....
He had a lot of things to think about.
***
Xanatos froze, staring at the Youngling that had just started stumbling its way down the hallway behind the others. He didn't spend much time in the creche, having little love for the noise and mess, and he'd somehow managed to forget how much time has passed.
"See your first Padawan there?" Qui-Gon joked beside him, studying the group of toddlers.
He almost choked at the idea, felt Master Dooku shift beside him. When he'd come back, he'd decided to go about consolidating power differently. It had been less than a year before Qui-Gon found him and he decided that becoming a Jedi would still work out best. Leaving as a Knight would get him far less scrutiny and he'd retain some allies in the Order if he played things right. 1
When he returned to the Temple, it was to find he wasn't the only one that got this second chance. And what his Grandmaster had told him...well, they had much more to prepare themselves for, now.
"Xan?"
Sucking in a breath, he looked at his Master (who he was enjoying breaking much more slowly and precisely this time), then back at the little boy who would have been his greatest legacy.
The choice presented to him was just too good to resist.
"I...I think I have."
He walked forward, catching Obi-Wan's curious gaze, and the boy went willingly into his arms, snuggling into his hold as Xanatos projected comfort into the Force around them.
Master Dooku stepped up beside them, gently stroking the boy's hair. He'd told Xanatos much of his brother Padawan's tragic future, always tinged with the regret that Obi-Wan had never joined him. Unlike Feemor with his peasant family or the uncouth slave boy that Qui-Gon had wanted to replace all three of them with, Obi-Wan had been properly raised and even during their frenetic encounters, had rarely seemed less than civilized. It was no wonder Dooku had respected him over the dregs of the rest of his remaining lineage.
While Xanatos didn't know the adult Obi-Wan, he did remember him as a child. He remembered the way he worshipped Qui-Gon, the way he twisted himself around trying to become exactly what his Master wanted. He would have died just to have Qui-Gon's approval.
Xanatos wouldn't be as foolish as Qui-Gon, he would take full advantage of that. In his mind's eye, he could already imagine the General Kenobi that Dooku had told him of, loyal to Xanatos.
"Hello, little one," he murmured, stroking Obi-Wan's cheek. "I'll be your master someday soon."
****
He's surprised how much Obi-Wan has remained the same, without the crushing inferiority complex of a washed out Initiate weighing him down. Dooku had said the other version of him had been the ideal Jedi--the sort who would never Fall, who could fight superior opponents and win from skill not power, selfless and self-sacrificing. Xanatos had assumed most of that came from childhood abuse.
But in this timeline, Obi-Wan was one of the few Initiates who grew knowing they already had a Master and became a Padawan at the earliest age to a well-regarded, dashing Knight. A Master who visited often during his time in the creche and had no problem getting any bullies to back off (and if some of them were punished in ways that the Jedi would never know of, well, that was a master's perogative). And yet Obi-Wan still seemed to disbelieve just how good at all the Jedi business he was.
Xanatos thought maybe he was incapable of seeing such truths, since he thought Xanatos was an amazing Jedi and Xanatos was a Sith pretending to be a Jedi.
Or, at least, as much of a Sith as someone could get, completely removed from Bane's line and learning in secret as he and Dooku were.
Still, there was something so...flattering about his regard that Xanatos found himself trying to live up to it when he could. Helping people he would have ignored, biting back criticism at the non-humans, only snarking slightly at the uneducated and foolish. Pretending he thought these backwater planets deserved Jedi helping them.
He was still, of course, destroying Qui-Gon's mind and soul little by little behind Dooku's back. And running some companies from the shadows that no version of Obi-Wan would ever approve of. And plotting the downfall of both the other Sith and the Jedi.
But he had some time to waste, all of his plans too long-term, enough that he could be kind to strangers in return for Obi-Wan's bright smiles. Could go out of mission parameters to help more just to overhear Obi-Wan talking in awed tones about him to his peers.
Xanatos could understand why Yoda thought Obi-Wan could save Qui-Gon from himself in the last life. He also found Qui-Gon even more pathetic for not realizing what sort of treasure he'd had.
****
"Stop! Please!"
Xanatos stared in horror as his Padawan--who was supposed to stay safe on the ship--threw himself into the battlefield, his lightsaber lit...and catching Master Dooku's blade before it could strike down another Mandalorian.
The blade shut off an instant later, Dooku hurriedly stepping back as if to show he was no threat.
Obi-Wan was thirteen, tiny, and still so soft-hearted that Xanatos thought it might be an affect of his very soul, not just his upbringing. He shouldn't have been anywhere near Galidraan, especially after he and Dooku had decided it should go similar to the last time to keep Mandalore destabilized, but the Council had foolishly thrown him into the mission.
And he must have felt the death and pain from all the way back at the ship. He looked like he'd run the entire way, breathing hard but so sure of himself.
"What are you doing?! We're peacekeepers, not--not murderers!"
A few of the Knights had already turned off their sabers, horror echoing around them like they'd only just realized what they were doing. The Mandalorians were using the distraction to regroup, huddling together and trying to save some of their injured. Many of their blasters were still pointed at the Jedi, but none anywhere near Obi-Wan.
"Get out of the way, brat!" Vosa started, actually looking like she planned to attack the Padawan.
That Dooku had ever thought he could raise her differently still baffled Xanatos.
"Adiik," a Mandalorian shifted towards Obi-Wan, others following, as though they could defend him.
And then Xanatos finally moved, fury flushing through him and making it so, so hard to conceal his Darker nature. "Don't even think about it, Vosa."
He stood next to and a little in front of Obi-Wan, now, facing down his Master's sister Padawan, unintentionally defending the Mandalorians. Any doubts about his actions he had were banished when Obi-Wan's free hand gripped his robe, their bond shivering with his Padawan's adoration.
She scoffed. "Your attachment to the boy is clouding your senses."
"Your anger and fear are making yours questionable," he shot back, knowing the others would understand he was accusing her of near-Falling.
Before she could defend herself, Dooku gripped her arm, forcing it down. Xanatos met his eyes, trying to convey the new plan in just a few looks. Obi-Wan, from what he'd heard, had some Force-driven connection to Mandalore in the last life, and now he'd have the remains of the True Mandalorians owing him their lives. It couldn't be a coincidence.
***
Xanatos didn't normally approve of most of his Padawan's friends, he'd done his best over the years to isolate him more and more, making sure he was too busy to spend time with them, to distracted even to send them messages. His Padawan should be solely focused on him.
But Vos...had his uses. The Council was biding its time, waiting for him to Fall, and from what Dooku had said it would happen. And Vos came with Tholme, having a Shadow see Xanatos as an ally could never hurt.
So, Obi-Wan was allowed one friend, for all the headaches their exploits gave Xanatos. Two too-angry boys that no one would have wanted if they hadn't been chosen by Masters so young. Who would, as much as their exposure to Xanatos and Dooku, help guide each other to the Dark.
***
Dooku and he had been preparing for this moment perhaps more than any other. Too much hinged on one person and they'd gone back and forth for ages trying to decide if one of them wouldn't just take a detour and kill the kid.
Yet here they were, watching Qui-Gon twist himself into knots trying to get the Council to accept a nine year old as his Padawan.
Qui-Gon had asked Xanatos to watch the boy while he spoke with them (and Dooku, of course, was on the Council now, so he couldn't do it). Normally, even if Obi-Wan was newly Knighted and not technically under Xanatos' authority anymore he would have given the task to him.
But not for this child.
He did a good job at playing innocent, an even better job at hiding his Darkness behind a blinding amount of Force. But Xanatos now had his confirmation about what it was that meant just he and his Grandmaster had been brought back before.
Falling.
"Xan? I brought--oh, hello." Obi-Wan, with his impeccably annoying timing, walked into Xanatos' rooms to find him and Skywalker staring at each other.
Before Xanatos could decide on a reaction, Skywalker was moving, giving Obi-Wan a bright, adorable smile and trying to help him with the containers of food he'd brought. Qui-Gon must have told him at some point and now Obi-Wan, aware of how little Xanatos liked children, thought he was helping his Master.
"Hi! I'm Anakin!"
Obi-Wan smiled softly and introduced himself, keeping up a pleasant conversation with this boy he thought would be part of his grandmaster's lineage. He already seemed charmed.
As if sensing just how much Xanatos was seething at watching the young man who always put him first focused on some brat, Skywalker spared a moment when Obi-Wan's back was turned to give Xanatos a truly cruel smirk. It was chilling on a child and made him hesitate from interfering, not sure how Skywalker would react.
When Obi-Wan finally had to go to one of the classes he was an assistant instructor for, they were alone again. Xanatos was exhausted from keeping himself from driving his lightsaber through to the little monster's heart. And his frustration that his former Padawan just did not notice, thought Skywalker was adorable.
"They're going to make me an Initiate," Skywalker stated, cruel eyes locking on Xanatos again. "And I'm going to be Obi-Wan's Padawan."
"I didn't think that worked out so well for you, last time."
Choking, he was choking, just for a moment, just as a warning. He didn't even feel the Dark except right around his neck. What was this creature?
"He was my Padawan, not Qui-Gon's. You won't find him such a pushover."
"He's mine. He'll always be." Skywalker's face was twisted and ugly, his hands clenching at his sides.
Xanatos gritted his teeth, knowing he didn't want to upset Skywalker too much. He would just have to make sure Obi-Wan took someone else as a Padawan, first. Assuming the boy wouldn't kill them. Which...Dooku had said part of the plan Sidious had for Skywalker's Fall involved slaughtering the whole creche.
"There are plans in place, Dooku and I have spent decades--"
"I don't care what your ineffectual plans are, I know exactly what needs to be done. Either you help me or you're standing in my way. You don't want me as your enemy."
Despite the threat coming from a nine year old, Xanatos knew the words were true.
xxxxxx
A/N: So, as I mentioned on my tumblr, this started out as an idea that Xanatos came back in time to just before his Trials and then Obi-Wan also goes back in time to just before Naboo (aka his Trial) and shenanigans. And I might still write that at some point, but instead this one was what actually happened.
For this, basically, the disaster lineage members who Fell are the ones who get sent back in time, to just a little before they're taken by the Jedi.
Anakin is still dark here because like two seconds of doing something good because his kid is otherwise going to die after like twenty years of committing genocide and shit isn't really the same thing as a true redemption lbh And I guess you could say this assumes Force ghosts don't exist or something like that lol
Quinlan included in this because you're all freaking obsessed with him lol
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nny11writes · 4 years
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For the fun author ask!:) Ahsoka let herself become numb. She turned her face to stare up at the Council, and for the first time wondered who had actually been on her side. From the split Council to the split jury. Her mind quiets and Ahsoka simply stares blankly instead of seeing. A split vote meant very little right now. Not when her own Master is sitting right up there and for all his insistence that he wanted to help her, for all he professed his love in his own way, her Master stays silent.
HHoooooooooooooooooo boy, you just dove right on in! :D A’ight, here we go on the sentencing scene from The Apprenticeship from the Close But No Cigar AU. 
Commentary will be in bold!
Ahsoka let herself become numb. 
For the first time ever in her life, Ahsoka Tano has given up.
She has dissociated before and is actually grateful for it now, happily surrendering to it because she can’t take anymore.
She turned her face to stare up at the Council, and for the first time wondered who had actually been on her side. From the split Council to the split jury. 
In this fic, even though Ahsoka already knew that it was split she’d never really given it thought to figure out who was in her corner. She had made a LOT of assumptions by this point and they’re all getting knocked down one by one.
Which is unfortunate because Ahsoka doesn’t actually know what happened. Over the years both Ahsoka and Yoda have made mistakes and withdrawn from one another. Yoda may have slammed the wedge between them, but Ahsoka keeps pounding it deeper and deeper.
Her mind quiets and Ahsoka simply stares blankly instead of seeing. A split vote meant very little right now.
She’s not wrong and that’s the thing that’s crazy. A split decision means nothing because it wouldn’t have mattered if the Jedi or Republic found her innocent. Palpatine wanted her gone and he needed to sow distrust for the Jedi, he would have twisted those decisions regardless. But by having it Ahsoka can jump wildly to conclusions.
Not when her own Master is sitting right up there and for all his insistence that he wanted to help her, for all he professed his love in his own way, her Master stays silent.
This is one of the most poignant moments in the whole story.
At the end of the day, this story in particular is about the familial relationship between Ahsoka and everyone else, but in particular to Master Yoda.
It’s wonderful that in canon Ahsoka doesn’t vilify Anakin for his role in her trials, even though he’d been helping to search for her. It’s also just...not the way I think that would’ve actually happened.
Master-Padawan relationships are deep and close and loving and complicated and messy and beautiful and life long. Ahsoka and Yoda are no exception.
But they were wildly different people with different ways of showing their love and care.
I’ve talked about this before, but I love Yoda. He’s a fantastic character and I think he’s a good person too. But being a good person does not mean you are always good. As such he’s written in a way that leaves his true motives unknown to Ahsoka and to the readers, and that was by design. I wanted everyone to be questioning what his role in this whole mess had really been, not just the trial but their apprenticeship.
Ahsoka can’t know that right now Yoda is literally thinking about jail breaking her out of this situation to run away as vagabonds. She doesn’t know that he genuinely regrets what he did to her, or that this whole situation has literally turned his world upside down.
This was, in part, meant to echo the earlier sentiment of “who was really in my corner”. When the Jedi trial happened, Yoda was not on her side BECAUSE of his bias towards her. Ever since then he has been. He’s been actively giving Obi-Wan, Qui Gon, and Anakin resources to find any evidence they can. He’s been staying up at night meditating by himself and with Mace to try and find a lead or an answer. He’s slept almost as little as she has, sick to death with fear and worry and the dawning realization that this whole karked up situation is his fault.
But Ahsoka doesn’t know that.
So right here? This is where Ahsoka really truly gives up on him too. Believes that there is nothing to salvage, nothing worthwhile or good left. That it was something of a farce the whole time.
And she’ll believe that for the next decade at least.
Master Yoda had once sat with her during a meditation, explaining through impressions and even some vague memories on how she should let the Force guide her. That she was not more important or all knowing, that she needed to have faith that it would do what was needed. Knowing when to speak up and knowing when to be silent, and always, always listening to the will of the Force.
BONUS TIME
Because this is where I dove into some of what I just talked about. This is Yoda’s known tried and true method, and he used it now as well. Right at this moment he is silent because speaking up would do nothing but hurt them all further and make the situation worse.
I know that this is an unpopular opinion with many fans, but the Order actually handled what happened in canon to the best of their ability. Anakin gets away with ignoring the reality of the galaxy because people like the Council take the hit for him over and over again. They could not have done anything to help her without having destroyed themselves.
Yes, even banning Ahsoka from the Order. Their hands were tied and they could not give up the life of every other Jedi for Ahsoka Tano, no matter how unjust and unfair her situation was.
In canon I don’t think Palpatine had a hand in the bombing at all, but he certainly used it to push his own agenda hard enough so the Jedi would lose and he would win.
Ahsoka hoped that he could sense something she could not. She hoped that it had nothing to do with letting this injustice stand. She hoped that he would fight.
Yoda stood, his gaze catching hers for a moment, his ears drooping, and was gone.
Again, Ahsoka has no way of knowing that Yoda isn’t abandoning her here. She’s exhausted and currently isn’t existing within her own body and mind. Her hope in this moment is the weakest hope she’s ever had. Hope with dread that she already knows what will happen.
The great tragedy of Star Wars, in my opinion, is that so many people who are so full of love never fully express it to one another. That miscommunication and misunderstanding around love is what tears some of it’s kindest people down and turns them into cold villainous people.
And it was not by happenstance that I made this particular scene go like this.
In this AU, Palpatine is still not directly responsible for the bombing, but he’s more aware of the players because he’s been trying to get rid of Tano for years at this point.
Palpatine’s plan involved him knowing about Barriss and Kalifa going to anti-Jedi rallies, but Barriss turned aside and Kalifa doubled down thanks to her trauma. Palpatine has tried for a long while now to have Ahsoka fall because of her high status and public persona, and he was hoping that if she fell he could make a case against Yoda who’s apprentices turn dark and attack the Republic. How do we know that Yoda has not done this on purpose? He wishes to destroy the Republic and install the Jedi as a military dictatorship!
(The worst part is, Ahsoka is on a knifes edge here, closer than any of them really realize to going either way. This is actually a moment I’ve considered writing an AU for, because this could be the moment this Ahsoka becomes a Sith.)
Palpatine doesn’t know who the chosen one is but he will settle for Ahsoka or Kalifa as a throw away apprentice or inquisitor while he waits. So he pits them against one another and puts himself into a win win scenario, no matter what happens he will be rid Tano as an obstacle and have her as a tool to destroy Yoda and the Order by extension.
His direct involvement makes the Force a chaotic mess, which hamstrings Yoda who is crystallized in his ways, which pushes Tano ever closer to one of two instabilities in Palpatine’s mind.
Any way it gets sliced, he’s revealed the cracks in their foundation and let Yoda and Ahsoka destroy what they had themselves.
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