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bixels · 12 days

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Learning that fans hated Applejack and called her "boring" is crazyyy to me because I genuinely, unironically believe AJ's the most complex character in the main six.

Backstory-wise, she was born into a family of famers/blue collar workers who helped found the town she lives in. She grew up a habitual liar until she had the bad habit traumatized outta her. She lost both her parents and was orphaned at a young age, having to step up as her baby sister's mother figure. She's the only person in the main gang who's experienced this level of loss and grief (A Royal Problem reveals that AJ dreams about memories of being held by her parents as a baby). She moved to Manhattan to live with her wealthy family members, only to realize she'll never fit in or be accepted, even amongst her own family. The earlier seasons imply she and her family had money problems too (In The Ticket Master, AJ wants to go to the gala to earn money to buy new farm equipment and afford hip surgery for her grandma).

Personality-wise, she's a total people-pleaser/steamroller (with an occasional savior complex) who places her self worth on her independence and usefulness for other people, causing her to become a complete workaholic. In Applebuck Season, AJ stops taking care of herself because of her obsessive responsibilities for others and becomes completely dysfunctional. In Apple Family Reunion, AJ has a tearful breakdown because in she thinks she dishonored her family and tarnished her reputation as a potential leader –– an expectation and anxiety that's directly tied to her deceased parents, as shown in the episode's ending scene. In The Last Roundup, AJ abandons her family and friends out of shame because believes she failed them by not earning 1st place in a rodeo competition. She completely spirals emotionally when she isn't able to fulfill her duties toward others. Her need to be the best manifests in intense pride and competitiveness when others challenge her. And when her pride's broken, she cowers and physically hides herself.

Moreover, it's strongly implied that AJ has a deep-seated anger. The comics explore her ranting outbursts more. EQG also obviously has AJ yelling at and insulting Rarity in a jealous fit just to hurt her feelings (with a line that I could write a whole dissection on). And I'm certain I read in a post somewhere that in a Gameloft event, AJ's negative traits are listed as anger.

Subtextually, a lot of these flaws and anxieties can be (retroactively) linked to her parents' death, forcing her to grow up too quickly to become the adult/caregiver of the family (especially after her big brother becomes semiverbal). Notice how throughout the series, she's constantly acting as the "mom friend" of the group (despite everything, she manages to be the most emotionally mature of the bunch). Notice how AJ'll switch to a quieter, calmer tone when her friends are panicking and use soothing prompts and questions to talk them through their emotions/problems; something she'd definitely pick up while raising a child. Same with her stoicism and reluctance at crying or releasing emotions (something Pinkie explicitly points out). She also had a childhood relationship with Rara (which, if you were to give a queer reading, could easy be interpreted as her first 'aha' crush), who eventually left her life. (Interestingly enough, AJ also has an angry outburst with Rara for the same exact reasons as with EQG Rarity; jealous, upset that someone else is using and changing her). It's not hard to imagine an AJ with separation anxiety stemming from her mother and childhood friend/crush leaving. I'm also not above reading into AJ's relationship with her little sister (Y'all ever think about how AB never got to know her parents, even though she shares her father's colors and her mother's curly hair?).

AJ's stubbornness is a symptom of growing up too quickly as well. Who else to play with your baby sister when your brother goes nonverbal (not to discount Big Mac's role in raising AB)? Who else to wake up in the middle of the night to care for your crying baby sister when your grandma needs her rest? When you need to be 100% all the time for your family, you tend to become hard-stuck with a sense of moral superiority. You know what's best because you have to be your best because if you're aren't your best, then everything'll inevitably fall apart and it'll be your fault. And if you don't know what's best –– if you've been wrong the whole time –– that means you haven't been your best, which means you've failed the people who rely on you, which means you can't fulfill your role in the family/society, which makes you worthless . We've seen time and time again how this compulsive need to be right for the sake of others becomes self-destructive (Apple Family Reunion, Sound of Silence, all competitions against RD). We've seen in The Last Roundup how, when no longer at her best, AJ would rather remove herself from her community than confront them because she no longer feels of use to them.

But I guess it is kinda weird that AJ has "masculine" traits and isn't interested in men at all. It's totally justified that an aggressively straight, misogynistic male fandom would characterize her as a "boring background character." /s

At the time of writing this, it's 4:46AM.

#mlp #yeah i wrote this last night during insomnia.#yeah i know an embarrassing amount of crap about this kids show #but whatever it's my hyperfixation i'll store as much useless information as i want!!!#i'm gay and neurodivergent i have an excuse #in case you needed more proof that aj's my favorite character #personal #delete later #unless you like this analysis stuff #i get why they didn't reveal aj's parent's death until way later and why they didn't do much with it but i wish they did #cuz narratively there could've been so much material with aj's grief. like. i feel like we gloss over the fact that she lost her #mother and father as a teenager #i tried keeping my personal hcs out of this to keep it unbiased #but i'll put some in the tags #involving rarijack –– i think aj can be (but not always) very self-conscious about her relationship with rarity #anxieties that she's not the right fit or that rarity will move away and leave her some day or that another woman will take her attention #(like in rollercoaster of friendship?? nudge nudge??). basic seperation anxiety stuff #long post #regarding applebloom whenever i think about her and her parents i think about that scene in steven universe where steven looks up at #a portrait of his mother and openly wonders what kind of sack lunches she would've made for him. that episode still fucks me up

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puhpandas · 4 months

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family photo 2.0

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levuna · 1 year

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So everyone’s talking about the Goncharov main theme, but how about the music from the farewell scene?

#i tried uploading this as a reblog to the music posted by caramiaaddio last night but it wouldn’t let me :(#Goncharov #unreality #i wrote this in a bit of a daze at like two in the morning #it’s midi piano but me on the viola btw #i’m not very satisfied with the recording but i’m afraid if i mess with it too much longer the meme will have passed #music

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weredemonz · 5 months

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Dumb Maggie doodle as a warm up <-(currently going through the worst art rut known to man)

#i tried to post this thrice last night but alas #the text was so Magnificus coded #inscryption #Magnificus #inscryption fanart #my art

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hearts401 · 6 months

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Decided to finally design post scoop mike. He’s wearing a wig and it crunches when you touch it

#gave him a wig ONLY because I wanted to mess with his hair style #he tried to style it himself but it didn’t go well and this is the result #he also just didn’t like his hair anymore. he’d grown into his father 🥹#my art #drew these on paper last night and then finished em on my phone ough #I have not draw. anything worth posting on my laptop except an unfinished comic I will never touch again #michael afton

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leverage-ot3 · 8 months

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hozier starting to sing take me to church and then unfurling a pride flag healed something in me actually

if you listen closely you can hear me yell ‘oh my god’ when he does it

#(don’t listen too closely though I’m a bad singer lol)#I tried to post this Sunday night but it didn’t go through #I had no idea he was going to do it I almost cried #not leverage #hozier #slept at our airbnb for like 4 hours #woke up for an hour until Cumbies would be open so I could get breakfast (5am)#and then drove over 2.5 hours to get back home in time to get prepared for work #I ended up teaching my two hour group and then working till twelve and taking the rest of the day off #I forgot my meds so I slept ten hours until 10 at night 💀#worth it #seeing him was a spiritual experience fr #and this was like SO spontaneous. like I cannot express enough how much I didn’t plan for this #also I literally got my tickets saturday when the show was sunday. thank u stubhub ur a true mvp #I knew my friends were going and were staying overnight and someone in my facebook group was selling tickets last minute and was like 👀👀👀#I’m not gonna go into how she decided to sell to someone else later that day when I had already made plans and made me cry but whatever #it worked out in the end

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biblically-accurate-dca · 13 days

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@vanweek2024 day 5 - chance

now's your chance

bonus

spammy

#my art #vanweek2024 #vanessa fnaf #vanessa sb #glitchtrap #HE'S THERE THIS TIME !!#first time properly drawing the bastard ♡ did i do good?#ngl i had no idea what to do for this theme. tried to go for the idea of willy boy going 'he's right there vanessa. it's time to kill'#the drawing itself was very fun !! the texture reminds me of a handmade stamp or something? lol #im posting this pretty late cause i couldnt finish it last night lmao #and um. spammy was like the only idea i had for awhile. so HFJSJGKF she's here too #anyway completely unrelated but im at a super fucking annoying party rn pray 4 me ♡

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boyloser6526384 · 3 months

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lovers or friends desire two things.

#in honor of mitch assisting on austons 50th goal last night #which could mean nothing #i tried so hard to find who made this excerpt but literally nothing wpild come up #i think its just from an old tumblr post tbh #toronto maple leafs #1634 #mitch marner #auston matthews #ausmitch

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necrowtic · 5 months

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#garlic speaks #im going to reblog this poll so much warning you in advance #i want. my data #if everyone is niceys to me and reblogs it ill reblog it less (🥺🥺🥺)#ive tried to scale this post better than that one from last night but i do still have to clump all of a million + into one answer sorry :(

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solcorvidae · 4 months

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I've been thinking about how Lambert, Eskel, and Geralt all deal with the trials and how it shapes them into the people they would grow to become.

Lambert remembers his past. He is angry, upset, bitter, and vindictive. He's got this fire in him that is only stoked by the pain and suffering forced upon him. He remembers the boys who did not make it: the hell they all had to go through, and he has a complicated relationship with Vesemir that surrounds it. Lambert does questionable things that Geralt is bothered by in his grief and anger. Geralt calls him out for killing in cold blood, needlessly and mercilessly.

Lambert avoids Vesemir at Kaer Morhen and mocks him when he is not around. He may come off as childish and like an asshole, but Lambert knows what he feels. Lambert doesn't lash out because he can't control his emotions or because he doesn't understand the path of least resistance. He knows. He chooses to avoid conflict with Vesemir at Kaer Morhen by keeping out of his way. He knows he can't control his emotions effectively if he is face-to-face with him for too long. He knows, and he isn't stupid.

Lambert talks to Geralt about the trials and the injustice of it all. He probably looks up to Geralt, hoping his brother feels just as angry about it as he does. He went through the Trial of the Grasses twice for Christ's sake! Why is he not more angry? Why is he so apathetic?

And Geralt brushes him off time and time again. Such is life, is his attitude. We all went through it, he says. Geralt can't be upset because there is nothing he can feasibly do about it. He didn't choose to be a Witcher. He wouldn't have chosen this life. He would have some other job somewhere else, just like he told Regis. He can't change the past. He can't go back and fix something he never had control over in the first place. Besides, they can’t inflict the trials upon a new generation of kids, not anymore. It’s in the past now, so why dwell on it? What’s done is done and thank god no other kids have to suffer the way they did. It’s over. It’s time to move on.

Geralt doesn't enjoy fame. He tells Eskel this in To Bait a Forktail. Geralt is the famous twice-grassed White Wolf. He is The Witcher. The famed Geralt of Rivia. He has expectations piled upon him the size of mountains. He's got to be the perfect Witcher, he's got to be a loyal brother, a lover, and a best friend… Geralt had expectations put upon him that set him aside from the rest since he was a kid. He hates it. Underneath the banter and the wit, Geralt accepts that this is his life, but that doesn't mean he likes it. He tolerates it because it is his reality and nothing more. If he thinks about it for too long… maybe it will consume him.

"You remember her?" he asks Eskel about his mother.

Unlike Lambert, Geralt hardly knows what it means to live another life. He doesn't have that following him like it does with his brother. What little he remembers is not enough to erase the apathy drilled into him at such a young age. Maybe he has a more strict moral code than say, Lambert, (or if you want to bring in the other Witcher schools, most of the Cats and the caravan) but that doesn't make him the most ethical person on the Continent. How could you be? After all that he has endured, the things he was taught? Where do you draw the line? He kills monsters, but like in Velen, it's hard to see where the line's drawn in the sand.

Humans are monstrous too.

Eskel, however? Maybe he's jealous. He did everything right, why shouldn’t he be? He is superiorly skilled in magic, one hell of a good Witcher. He has a reputation for it. Maybe he's not as kind as your average person, but he gets the job done. He's got a more relaxed demeanour than his brothers which reveals itself in his reputation. He's reliable. He is damn good at what he does. So why does Geralt get all the attention? The fame? He clearly doesn't want it.

While Lambert got turned into a vindictive prick and Geralt became a quick-witted nihilist, Eskel? He's exactly who he should be. Why shouldn't he be praised for it like his brother? Why should he be forced to bend over backwards to accommodate people and keep up with his reputation? For what? His skills? Ha! He lives in the shadows of Geralt who's notably a good Witcher, but he's not quite as good as Eskel.

Eskel was beaten shaped into the man he is today because of the trials, his training, and everything else. Should he not get credited for that too? Why does someone who doesn't even want his fame get all the recognition? Genetic predisposition? Shouldn't his hard work be given more consideration and praise? Thank god Geralt survived the hell of being subjected to two rounds of mutagens rather than one, but why should that overshadow the efforts, the time, and the sacrifices that everyone else around him has made? Eskel is exactly the man that they intended him to be by the end of it all. He is an efficient hunter, he is outstanding with signs, and he works diligently for his reputation. He did everything right. He does everything right. Why is that not enough?

TL;DR: Lambert, Geralt and Eskel handle their traumas in different ways. Lambert gets vengeful, Geralt gets apathetic, and Eskel gets borderline jealous. (And it breaks my heart)

#this probably doesn't make as much sense as it does in my head but I tried to write it in the most coherent way that I could #this has been gnawing at me since last night I needed to get it out of my head because its eating me alive #the witcher #the witcher 3 #geralt of rivia #eskel #lambert #eskel witcher #lambert witcher #eskel tw3 #lambert tw3 #meta post #witcher meta #sol rambles #sol scribbles

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elsannafondue · 7 months

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that corset + trousers look for the stage musical really is something, isn't it?

(sketch to commemorate my maybe-return to the fandom + nostalgia is this a midlife crisis???)

#elsanna #arencest #elsanna fanart #icest #elsa x anna #mine #my art #i tried posting last night but nothing showed up in the tag lol

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yea-baiyi · 8 months

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about hua cheng re: that conversation w xie lian about his “true appearance”, and why hua cheng freaks out when xie lian’s asks to see his real appearance — like san lang is basically his normie appearance. whereas he usually prefers to be full makeup platform heels acrylic nails. but when xie lian asks the question, he wonders if xie lian would consider his “true form” as his ugly self. (after all, that’s what most people mean when they ask for someone’s true form — they mean their original human appearance). but the way xie lian phrased it makes it clear that it’s about being open and comfortable with each other, not about some demand for truth. which reassures hua cheng not only that xie lian will like him no matter his true appearance, but that he would accept hua cheng’s chosen appearance as his “true self” because it’s how he truly sees and portrays himself, rather than his original appearance. xie lian’s words assure him that it’s not the Honesty or the Original appearance that matters, just that he’s aware that san lang is a facade for his benefit and he’d rather see hua cheng the way he prefers to appear.

#hua cheng #tgcf #hualian #meta stuff #trans hua cheng #my hyperfixation demon #just posting the whole thing as i wrote it last night #tried to rework it but tbh my friends understood the original just fine so.#anyway it’s relevant that when most stories - including tgcf!! - refer to a monster or ghost’s ‘true form’#they mean their original human form!!#so it’s reasonable that hua cheng thinks that’s what xie lian is asking for!! which is terrifying to him!!#because that form is traumatising and not what he identifies with!!#but also he wants to be honest with xie lian he doesn’t want to lie or deny his request #but xie lian’s response makes it clear he’s not asking for. radical vulnerability or hua cheng’s trauma #he just wants hua cheng to be comfortable!!#because he knows san lang’s appearance is a disguise for his benefit #he just wants hua cheng as he prefers to appear!!#and that’s why hua cheng starts laughing in relief #because of course xie lian just wants hua cheng as he is #god god god he’s so transgender for this he really is #hee really my hyperfixation demon forreal this just suddenly came to me. while i was watching cql

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ej-artyarts · 7 months

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Day 13 - VIDEO GAME PT 2

“So come with me, let’s die anywhere else! Anywhere, just not here.” — DIE ANYWHERE ELSE - Alec Holowka (Night in the Woods)

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bookrat · 5 months

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Pretty sure my little man has a case of abundism affecting the marble tabby coat under all those white splotches

#random pet post #it really is a weird coat pattern #I'm never sure if I should describe him accurately as a white marked tabby or as the first impression people get of a black and white cat #love his little backward C's #I got all my other pets around the same time and they've been dying off one by one this last year or so #I'm down to just this 4yo kit and Bruiser #actually I'm not done whispering in the tags #pretty soon it's just gonna be me and this terrible little man against the world #and he gives me such weird problems you cannot even begin to imagine #took to the leash and harness without a bit of difficulty but I can't take him anywhere cuz he freaks out about people 500ft away #really difficult to find sitters for him cuz he gets so stressed about changes and waits until 3am to SCREAM #he's 17 lbs and wants to sleep on my chest 14 hours a day #took him on a work trip a week or 2 ago cuz of aforementioned petsitting troubles and some kind of wire got crossed #so instead of stress peeing in my laundry basket he now humps the nearest blanket covered limb to alert me of problems #he got scared of his water dish recently and is only now starting to get over it after 3 weeks of drama #he knocked it over last night and humped my leg while I tried to sleep to try and convey to me that he was thirsty #I'm thinking of getting a second cat and just fucking hoping that it'll be normal and maybe Prompto can target it for some of his weirdness

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icewindandboringhorror · 5 months

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Some (late) holiday photos of the boye~!

#cats #holiday #OUGHH....... barely could even get these edited and posted... my mysterious sickness flare up has been sooo bad the past few #days.. I didn't even go to the usual obligatory family christmas I was supposed to attend (!!! health issue/medical mention in tags below)#My stomach issues basically put me in a constant state of uncontrollable shivering/body shaking + nausea + sometimes rapid heart #rate. and when it happens at night that makes it like.. nearly impossible to sleep when you're violently shaking + you can feel your heart #so strong + you keep having to run to the bathroom every 5 minute to cough and gag #and throw up and so on and so forth. etc. So I went like 40 hours without any sleep almost for christmas eve and all of christmas day #last night I finally got maybe 2 hours of sleep in between the nausea and shaking and stuff. and then today I was able to get a few #hours of sleep in the afternoon. Today I tried taking an anxiety mediciation a doctor gave me in case it was anxiety related (it's apparent #ly used to relax people and works in the moment. rather than like Anxiety Mediciation that you have to take for weeks to see any effect #because I think this isn't actually acting on your brain chemistry it's judt like..a mild sedative or something.) but all that did was make #me dizzy and sweaty lol. I;m glad I slept a little but I'm just still frustrated that I don't feel normal. I started having these #'episodes' (with the stomach issues + shaking + heartrate + nausea etc.) like at the end of october. And usually it will happen for like a #few hours at a time. or i'll lose sleep one day and then be fine the next. but this has been like nearly 3 days of feeling weird. so is #getting kind of annoying... It's funny too because I was so so productive like.. literally the few days before. I was feeling much better #and I was working on my game and blah blah. But then.. random issue flare up out of nowhere of course.. yaayy.... happy holidays to meee lo #I did at least see two random ducks outside of my window in the yard area for christmas. and havent seen them since. So it's like.. hrmm..#pacing around my room nauseous and shakings and etc. but at least... hello.. two little ducks placed there just for me :3c #Now I get anxiety every night which I'm sure doesn't help/could exacerbate whatever underlying genuinely physical issues exist. But after #like 2 nights of 'I spend the night sleepless and incredibly uncomfortable just sitting in the dark sick' then bedtime is like.. dread...#I even was trying slapping myself in the face in desperation to see if somehow that could shock my body out of whatever the hell it was #doing lol.. up at 3am holding ice cubes in my hand and hitting myself in the head and crying from exhaustion and thowing up.. literally #ridiculous cartoon character feeling... AAANYWAY!!! At least I have baby boy pictures. and I have lots of doctors appointments so hopefully #whatever the issue is can be sorted out at some point. I don't know much about ibs but hopefully maybe something like that that I could pos #ibly take medication for and not something more seirous or anything. Maybe there's a food I'm secretly intolerant to or whatever.#And I did at least post a sims holday video actually timed for the holidays so that's something. I havent been productive really latrely #though obviously.. I can't even play games or small tasks when in that state since I'm just SO physically uncomfortable. Nausea and heart #stuff are THE hardest physical sensations to ignore.. BUT yeah... hoping I shall sleep at all tonight. hopeing to get like 3 productive #things done.. at some point... at least SOMETHING... lol..... *** *** ***

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kateis-cakeis · 17 days

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You know, something something Arthur desperately wanted to see the good in magic at any opportunity he was given.

When Gwen was first accused, when he first met Morgause, when he wanted to save Uther using magic, when he saved the woman from being burnt in that small village, when he was given a choice by the Disir, when he was determined to save Gwen from Morgana's dark magic...

(Honourable mentions include when he saved Mordred and argued with Uther about the Druids being peaceful (they are magic adjacent after all) - and well, given the second honourable mention being his remorse for the raid on the Druid camp when he was young, it's understandable that it comes from some sort of trauma. And of course, the result of that remorse was the promise that he would do everything to prevent it ever happening again, and that he would treat the Druids with respect. Hell, even with Kara he was respectful, even though she committed actual literal treason in the form of an attempted assassination of Camelot's king)

Of course, at every opportunity, Arthur's view that there is good in magic, that not all sorcerers are evil, that perhaps his father was wrong, or that his father had lied, ends up being proven wrong, at least in his eyes.

Time and time again Arthur is shown to consider magic as a more neutral force, like almost as if he's desperate for it to be true. It isn't even necessarily his fault that the opinions about magic and sorcerers that Uther taught him becomes reinforced once again.

The fact that he can even think critically about magic at all is a miracle alone. Like this man who has only ever known sorcerers to use magic for evil purposes, to destroy Camelot, attempt to assassinate him, attempt to assassinate his father, to harm those he cares about - and yet he still he still falls back on, what if magic can be good, what if we're wrong, what if, what if, what if--

And it's only when magic itself reveals himself to Arthur that he can finally see that yes, magic can be good.

Because if Merlin is good, if Merlin is the same person even with magic, then magic is neutral, and sorcerers aren't inherently evil.

Arthur was always going to accept magic, that's the thing, that's hardcoded into his character, he just needed the right push, and that push was always going to be Merlin.

Because as Arthur dies in Merlin's arms, blanketed by magic itself, he accepts that even with all of Merlin's magic, his life cannot be saved, magic cannot save him.

But he accepts it, and accepts Merlin, and he dies having brought about all that Merlin ever dreamt of, truly dreamt of, that Arthur would see him for him, and accept him and his magic. And more than that, what Arthur truly ends up doing is embracing it.

Arthur for whatever reason, perhaps because he was born of magic, perhaps because his soulmate is magic itself, perhaps because he has a heart of gold, wanted to see the good in magic at any given opportunity that presented itself, even though with all that Uther taught him, he never should have seen it that way.

It's just, it's so fascinating, and it's so heartbreaking that when he finally knew, he died. But he'll return, and I'm sure then he can build something better with Merlin, really bring magic back to a time that needs it :)

#bbc merlin #merlin #arthur pendragon #merthur #i tried so hard to make this into a short post #but essay mode activated and i tried to stop it i swear :P #i try not to make every post about Arthur a straight up character study but i fail every time #just be glad this post is this short #i had to stop myself about halfway through from going to far into analysis mode #anyway i was thinking about writing this while trying to sleep last night #and i just had to get it down i love Arthur so much and i feel like he deserves more credit for thinking so critically despite there being #no evidence or reason for him to ever do that with magic #i love him the man fascinates me #and I really just wanna wrap him in a blanket - especially as like idk once he returns and finally gets to process all that he did #believing in his father's lies

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