#im getting so much enjoyment out of my reread
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My all new and incessant need to fill in bits of TRC/TDT storyline we know probably happened but didn’t get to see. Started a series of sorts on ao3 called ‘missing pieces’ under the same username and here’s some post-TRK Ronsey I’m working on :)
As Gansey drives, he can sense Ronan’s gaze on him. He can see that his face is turned towards him in the corner of his vision and he knows his eyes will be flicking from Gansey’s hand on the stick, to the dashboard, to his face then back again.
Gansey savours the moment.
It’s something that had happened for the last time once and when it occurred, he had no idea it was going to be the last time. But now it’s happening like there was never a break, never a pause or a hitch between a Gansey and Ronan before and a Gansey and Ronan now.
Tomorrow, Gansey will be getting on a plane but right now, he doesn’t think about that.
There’s a thousand things he wants to say, but he doesn’t know how he can say them, even though he’s sat beside his best friend who would absorb it all.
Over the past year, Ronan has changed and Gansey can see more than a glimpse of who he was before his father was murdered. He’s getting used to a smile that doesn’t hurt to look at and a laugh that comes easy and at little cost.
It’s almost dark now, the sun bleeding apricot and blush across the cloudless sky and Gansey is so excited to start his adventure with Blue and with Henry but—
He looks over at Ronan finally and his eyes are dark as the car interior draws the dusky evening in closer. He’s wearing a jacket as though the late August day left behind them on the still warm asphalt spoke of chilly autumn mornings.
The smell in the car is gasoline, sharp and thick and it’s the scent of years passed and Gansey feels sad. For a moment. Just a moment.
“Let me drive it,” Ronan says, his voice perfectly in sync with the sputtering cadence of the Pig’s engine, “Just once.”
Gansey smiles at the road in front of him as the orange creature eats it up, hungry for the miles it’s easily consuming. God, Gansey loves this car.
“Just once?” He repeats, “Like this version didn’t come directly from your head?” You’ve dreamt it, you’ve thought it, you’ve driven it.”
Ronan laughs and Gansey glances at him and watches how the passenger seat cradles his body and the back of his skull. His laugh rumbles within him like he himself runs off an engine.
“When you’re gone—“
“When I’m gone, it’ll be in my dad’s garage,” Gansey interrupts, “You’re not getting your hands on it, Lynch.”
Ronan says nothing but he’s still smirking and Gansey wonders whether he’s thinking of a weekend the previous year when Gansey had taken Adam to DC and Ronan had stayed in Henrietta and got himself into trouble.
Dream me the world, Gansey had told him and he had wondered since then if he had tried.
The dreamt Pig was perfect and faultless, meaning it was imperfect and had many faults, one being the fact that the engine would sometimes give up. Ronan dreamt the car to do this because he knew Gansey loved the old car fiercely, even though at times it was difficult. Sometimes Gansey wasn’t sure if it was the car he loved or the dreamer who dreamt it anew.
They drive now to a destination that remains a secret kept from Gansey, though he is the one taking them there. Ronan tells him when to turn and they climb up into the mountains as the sky fills with stars.
At some point during the drive, Gansey realizes where they’re going but he doesn’t point it out and he doesn’t ask why. He lets Ronan guide him as they remain in silence. A comfortable, familiar silence, one that feels good to hold, to run a hand over.
#their friendship#I obsess over#I’m thinking of that one quote#not when I’m gone dream me the world#the other one#there were a thousand reasons why he couldn’t say it#platonic ofc#but if we were to take a little trip#ronan lynch loved gansey#a lot#im getting so much enjoyment out of my reread#and rediscovering of the fandom#writing bits and posting it is just cathartic#love it#ronan lynch#gansey#richard campbell gansey iii#ronsey#ronan x gansey#trk#trc#the raven cycle#the raven king
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Hi baby, Im super like not myself lately and my writing has been suffering for it (I haven't touched my laptop since last week 🫠). Just wanted to pop in, say hi, I love you and I'm gonna be lurking and rereading fics on your page tonight for my own personal comfort. Also whenever you feel like it, I've been thinking about black vamp reader and sev going out for their first hunt together, that's all 🥺🥲 Kisses if you want them ladybug 😚
marsssss a million kisses for you baby i'm sorry you're in a funk <3. i love you so so so much i hope you feel better soon! also, yes, lets do it!
disclaimer!! i'm white-- so i'll try to make it an obviously black reader-- but if i make any mistakes just lmk and i'll change it asap!!
men and minors dni
sevika's nervous-- you can tell.
she hasn't let go of your hand since you arrived, and each time someone walks beside your hiding spot-- a dark little alcove in the alley behind a bar-- she gasps.
you squeeze her hand. "relax." you whisper. she huffs.
"can't we just eat more rats for a while?" she asks. you giggle.
"do you want to eat more rats?" you ask. she hums.
it took her a while to adjust to her new life as a vampire. she loves flying-- and even now, a month in to her transformation, she still giggles every time her feet leave the floor.
she's got beef with your little bat friend now that she can understand it-- and the feeling seems to be mutual, since he's always lunging at sevika and making her scream when he comes to visit you. they're both jealous-- possessive of you and your attention. you think it's cute.
when it comes to feeding though, sevika's still a little hesitant.
it's not the killing that puts her off-- hell, she does that anyways.
it's just that sevika became familiar with feeding with you, her acting as the blood bag. she thinks of it as something inherently intimate-- something that's meant to bond two people, something vulnerable.
and while it can be that, most of the time it's much more brutal and much less sexy-- and sevika's had some trouble wrapping her head around it.
but you've gotten tired of draining rats with her-- you miss the full bodied taste of human blood. and she's not really a fan either-- the fur tickles her too much for it to be enjoyable.
which leads you to now.
"what about him?" sevika asks as a drunk man stumbles by your hiding spot. you snort.
"he's not drunk enough." you say. sevika huffs.
"how long do we have to wait?" she whines, tugging your hand in hers. you giggle and press a kiss to her cheek. she relaxes at the press of your lips on her skin.
"as long as it takes, babe." you say. she sighs.
"you didn't tell me being a vampire would be so boring." she groans. you giggle.
"i did, actually." you say. sevika pouts. "c'mon, you don't have any enemies you wanna drain?" you ask. sevika huffs.
"i already told you! i don't have enemies-- at least not for long. i took care of 'em all already." she says, pouting again. you snort.
"so we're stuck here until you make a new one or someone comes stumbling by wasted." you say. she sighs. you kiss her to placate her again, and she hums against your lips. "it's not all bad." you remind her. "i never had a companion with me on my hunts-- this is fun."
"oh, have i been demoted to companion now?" she asks, glaring at you. you giggle.
"well, i don't see a ring on my finger." you say, teasingly wagging your fingers in front of sevika's face. she growls.
"you proposed to me! i don't need to get you a ring!" she cries. you laugh, reaching forward to fiddle with the ring that you pushed on her finger a month ago.
"i'm just saying-- until we say our 'i do's, legally, you're just my roommate."
"you're the one who won't let me take you to the courthouse--"
"they're up top and only open in the daytime! we can't get burnt on our wedding day sev!"
she grumbles, and you lean forward to kiss her again. she sighs against your mouth, wrapping her arms around your waist and pulling you against her body. you run your hands through her hair and tug, pulling a moan out of her.
just when she starts shoving a thigh between your legs, something down the alleyway clatters. you both look up and watch as a burly man doubles over and vomits behind a dumpster.
"hmm." you say, licking your lips as you examine the man. he's big enough for you to both get a decent drink from him, and drunk enough that he won't remember it in the morning. sevika nudges you.
"him?" she asks. you shrug.
"dunno. it's your first hunt, you tell me." you say.
you watch as sevika's eyes flit up and down the barfing man, her pupils widening and her tongue coming out to lick her lips in hunger.
"he... he's pretty drunk." she says. you nod.
"blacked out, probably." you say. she bites her lip. "can you smell him?" you ask. sevika sniffs the air, and her stomach rumbles. you giggle.
"f-fuck." she whispers.
"better than rats, right?"
"way better." she whispers.
"so?"
"i think it's him." she says, nodding at you. you smile.
"you wanna take the lead or just watch on your first hunt?" you ask. sevika shrugs.
"you go first-- i wanna see you in action." she says. you smile, kiss her cheek, then duck out of the alcove.
instinct takes over pretty quick. in a flash, you're in the air and flying over toward the man. you wait for the perfect moment, when he stands back up from vomiting, and then move in a flash.
your hand clamps over his mouth and your limbs wrap around his torso as you sink your teeth into his thoat from behind.
there's a muffled gasp and then a bit of a fight, but in a few seconds, he goes limp and falls to the pavement below him. you take a few big gulps from his artery, then pull off his neck and look over to where your fiance is watching you from her hiding spot.
"c'mere!" you call. she slowly walks over.
"'s a lot more scary when you're not doing it to me." she says. you chuckle.
"yeah, well, i wasn't as gentle and loving with him as i am with you." you say as sevika kneels on the other side of the man between you. you gesture at him. "go ahead." you encourage her.
sevika licks her lips as she looks down at the man beneath her, and then she leans down, lines her teeth up to the puncture wounds you'd left in his throat, and starts drinking.
"fuck." you whisper. she hums and looks up at you from where she's drinking, groaning at the taste. "that's so hot." you say. sevika laughs through her nose.
the blood in your body is filling you with strength and magic, and something warm starts bubbling in your stomach as you watch sevika drink from the holes you'd made in your victims neck.
it's hypnotizing. her throat bobs with each sip, there's a sweet furrow in her brow, and the little hums and grunts she lets out with each sip are incredibly tantalizing.
she's still new to it, and she's incredibly messy as she drinks. blood's covering her chin and cheeks, dripping slowly down her throat, and when she pulls away from him with a gasp, you nearly cum in your pants at the sight of your lover grinning and satisfied and covered in blood.
you launch yourself over the man between the two of you and tackle sevika to the pavement. she grunts as she lands, but quickly starts to laugh as you start licking up the blood covering her skin and grinding down against her thighs.
"fuck." you grunt. "you're so fucking hot." you whine.
"shit, i feel so..."
"warm?"
"yeah." she says, giggling-- a little high from the euphoria of finally drinking human blood. you grin then press your lips against hers. after a minute of making out, sevika pulls away with a gasp. "i want you." she says. you moan.
"you can have me."
sevika pushes you off of her then drags the two of you back into your hiding spot, quickly pushing both of your shirts under your armpits and pulling your pants down to your knees.
it's clumsy and messy and sticky with blood, but neither of you care as you grope and lick and kiss one another anywhere you can reach.
you're both high on blood, giggling and euphoric as you clumsily collide. it's a blur of brown skin on brown skin-- blood on fingertips and spit on lips as you grind and grope each other mindlessly.
you cum together, gasping against each other's mouths and shivering in each other's hands, and when you catch your breath, the first thing you say is "oh, i fucking love you."
sevika huffs and smiles, pressing another kiss to your lips.
"i love you too." she says, laughing. "i'm glad we still fuck after eating-- i was sad to let that go when you turned me." she says. you giggle.
"not regretting it after your first real feed?" you ask, tugging your pants back up over your ass and helping sevika button her own. she scoffs.
"hell no-- that was amazing. does it always taste that good?" she asks. you smirk and nod.
"of course, he's got nothing on your blood-- but i think that was more of a love thing than a taste thing." you say. sevika giggles.
"fuck off-- i taste amazing."
you grin. "yeah, you do." you say, shoving your thigh against her cunt. she gasps, then giggles.
taglist!
@fyeahnix @sapphicsgirl @half-of-a-gay @ellabslut @thesevi0lentdelights @sexysapphicshopowner @shimtarofstupidity @love-sugarr @chuucanchuucan @222danielaa @badbye666 @femme-historian @lia-winther @gr0ssz0mbi3 @ellsss @sevikaspillowprincess @leomatsuzaki @emiliabby
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valentines game
umich!rutger mcgroarty x f!reader
warnings: kissing, petnames such as: sweets, pretty girl/boy, baby, sweetheart and thats about it
A/N: Hi everyone! Long time no see, right? Anyways, After rereading this multiple times i realised thsi dosent really go with eachother but i have no motivation to make a whole new fic, so you guys will have to live w me writing badly. Also remember this is my 3rd time ever writing a fic, so bear with me! Alright enoigh peptalk, heres the little blurb i wrote at 2am..
Today was valentines day, and the boys at umich had a hockey game today. The valentines game, as they call it.
There was 10 minutes left of the last period and michigan were under by 3-4 against ohio state. The whole team was tired, sweating and taking out the last of their energy.
As they call out that theres 1 minute left of the game they start losing hope. But all of a sudden, Rutger gets a chance at a free net and he SCORES! The game was now tied 4-4. The last period ended and overtime begun. Only 34 seconds into the first OT, ethan edwards scores and michigan wins 5-4OT.
A few hours pass and everyone starts heading home. You finally get to see your boyfriend, rut. He had changed out of his hockey gear and was wearing just some pj pants and a grey tee.
'Rut! You did so good out there!' You say, smiling softly, hugging him and giving him a small peck on the lips.
'Aw thank you baby' Rutger cooes, looking down at you with his ocean blue eyes. 'I got you something' He purrs, revealing the beautiful red roses he got you. 'Happy valentines sweets'
'Rut.. I love them! i have something for you too, but its at home' You say innocently. 'Should we head home pretty boy?'
'Sure, love' He answers, leading you to the car. He opens your door for you before getting into the drivers seat.
The radio turns on, "Head over heels" by tears for fears is playing. 'Your so beautiful, y/n. Im so glad i met you' Rutger says smiling softly, looking into your eyes.
'I love you so much, rut.' I say, feeling like the happiest girl on earth.
As we step out of the car outside the apartment, the wind hits us with a swoosh. It feels chilly against our skin, but enjoyable. We head up to the apartment and ass song and we closed the door behind us i melt into his arms.
Our lips meet in a passionate, but romantic kiss. He places one hand on my waist and one on my neck. It feels like im kissing him for the first time again. Its like our lips were made for eachother. His lips are soft like clouds, and feel like heaven. He pulls away for a second to look at me. He smiles as he looks at me with the most lovable expression on his face.
'Now, what was that suprise of yours?' Rutger cooes. He says, holding his hand on my waist steady.
'I got myself a hockey jersey with your lastname on it, to show everyone im yours' I say sweetly.
'Sweet girl, put that on right now i need to see you in it' He says desperatly.
I go put on the jersey over my tight dress im wearing.
'Sooo, what do you think?' I say, looking at him with innocent eyes.
'I think its beautiful, just like you' He purrs, pulling me in for a loving kiss. He pulls away, and says: 'The goal i scored today, was for you. Only you. Thats why we call it the valentines game, where we score for our loved ones'
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hunting the tawute was so good im actually obsessed with it i think reread it three times?? OMLLL the knot play was so hot, i feel like theres not that much "knotting" when it comes to navi x human smut ive seen which is so sad bc come on human reader who can barely handle a navi cock and NOW has to deal with this damn knot thats literally keeping her connected to them while they fill up her insides constantly plsplspls
and the way loak got super posessive of reader when neteyam tried to stop him OMFGGGGG i need more posessive loak/neteyam AND WHEN LOAK KISSED HER BELLT BULDGE WHEN NETEYAM WAS RAILING HER i fell to the floor when i read that
dark/fucked up/hates human loak & neteyam with human reader who they basically treat as their toy/sex toy is literally my number 1 fantasy and dont even get me started on them getting her pregnant i always imagine it where navi and humans cant procreate but since they have some human dna it would work need them both to baby trap me so bad
thank u for feeding us dark fic enjoyers !
Y'all are making me blush!! 🧡 🧡 🧡
I'm so thrilled with how many people are loving Hunting the Tawtute and how you guys are into dark fics in general, and I'm so fucking here for it.
Definitely agree there's not enough knotting in Avatar. It's one of the hottest things to read in my opinion, but it's so hard to find. I'm sure you've read her stuff cause she's for sure the best at writing about heats/ruts/knotting, but if you haven't you should check out @tiredmamaissy - her stuff is fantastic and hot and just 🥵
CW:// Talk of Pregnancy & Pregnant Sex (under the cut):
Don't get ME started on them getting her pregnant. Good loooordddd, I could cum just thinking about it. And I LOVE the idea of the human DNA allowing them to impregnate her, and I imagine that it would take many, many, many rounds of breeding and filling her up for it to take. And then even after it does, they wouldn't be able to keep their hand off of her because now she smells like them all the time and possessiveness from the sight of her round with their baby makes them even more obsessed with her.
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reread the rest thus far of lackadaisy and there's the both v easy & difficult task of gathering a shit ton but only a shit ton of excerpts (like every single page is a highlight i'm not exaggerating)
and every single element is superlative and the way it all only becomes More So....already mentioned the way the like smooth gradient shading made the successful evocation of 3D Shapes more noticeable, along w/the consistent geometries of character design & details in fabric folds; the way Lighting & Coloring only goes on to become more prominent elements only enhances that further. the compositions, backgrounds, pacing, angles....everything is so dynamic & expressive, such as including the expressions which you know i also Love / absorbed
going "hell yes for people to discover this superlative comic" then having to occasionally refresh past site traffic overloaded server errors like "nooo" but actually yes
whilest clapping & cheering for the fun of everyone who's been here a minute. My God the invigorating reward when again i started reading in '07 & the concept of rocky & freckle on a "proper" run had only manifested via fun official bonus art, then a literal decade later as it was actually happening in the comic like screeeeaammm i can feel it coming in the air tonight oh lord etc....i've loved following it, again, if i see another new comic page. i am going to be Enriched
i also really was right on the ball myself this time around like okay okay yep i have picked up on Everything, at least to the degree i can lmao. i love the mysteries. i love how Character Focused it is too ofc and there's no characters i'm uniterested in / dislike. you gotta point to one of them, truly, and i have been a [pointing at freckle] enjoyer these fifteen years but fr i am a connoisseur of everyone, i love that so many characters are a weird mysterious chaos element story driver in their own right. i considered mordecai more intently than ever, love his like ultra mystery (and that we leave off on him doing some detectiving even) and truly fun that like, the source of the more Immediate problems he keeps having in every damn interaction isn't the like [wow mordecai with the just diving into the hatchet murdering] factor so much as it's that he's generally like "i am just standing here" and is not nt in any way that matters and people insist on fucking with him on that front. the peak tragedy of him in a bonus comic getting bullied into having to dance with someone to Be Polite like i'm so sorry i wish you could be that ficus too. anyways intrigued with the marigold &/or mordecai mysteries including that it's like, how coincidental is it that he talks about marigold having a thorn in its side & the savoys' nickname for him is peekon = thorn. there is so much to consider, love that for us truly. and i'm rooting for mordecai & nicodeme's dynamic out here, is another conclusion....very enriched by comparing & contrasting that serafine nicodeme mordecai triumvirate with the rocky ivy freckle one, to be sure. im enriched
i'm also enriched by every footnote that's got like historical facts / research notes / [this is inaccurate for xyz prioritization but here's the disclaimer] explanations. i Love information. and everything else like i loooove this comic it's Soooo Fucking putting my hands to my temples and inhaling at length through my teeth
#first time i've really taken tumblr up on that new thirty image limit expansion; bit of a surprise maybe lol#put your back into autism acceptance month &/or press j; scroll fast; read through it actually; filter the following:#long post //#learning abt the overwhelming popularity of baby ruth candy bars from lackadaisy footnotes? relevant to gtm:pota aficionadoship at one pt#remember discussing what i learned from another footnote abt some christian denominations / other religions being very Anti Prohibition#every time i use the word cagey i think of lackadaisy. cagey thing... we've all been there#fantastic time revisiting and i love to be considering all these characters all the further / with reckless juxtaposition#especially the two triumvirates as mentioned. rooting for them all#rooting for mordecai to be relieved of that v realistic [ppl sensing a Mess With His he is not nt in any way that mattersness Free For All]#either let him be or start shooting at him lmfao. but i Love that the gang had that pleasant nonbrunch together & no shots exchanged yet#more brunches! and i think nicodeme could be mordecai's bestie or w/e he wants. turn out to be Supportive in any way that matters#they are more so the ivy and freckle of their group after all lol. slightly would-be Unlikely coupling there as well anyways; and yet!#i am as enriched and intrigued and appreciative and etc as ever#and reminded that in my rereading i haven't yet gone over all the bonus material lol....#also stumbled across that sungwon cho had fandubs of lackadaisy comics posted like 9 yrs back??#which means i probably saw one or two; think i remember one being shared and checking that out#like hey didn't know i'd encountered you before like; vines & oh the lamps are fucking & etc. and now there he goes voicing mordecai yaay#lackadaisy
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i just finished if we were villains and because everyone compares it to the secret history i feel the need to get my thoughts out about the book and how it compares in my opinion... so spoilers i guess
characters:
in iwwv the characters are definitely a lot more likeable than tsh but i feel so much less about them, like with tsh i too wanted to kill bunny, each of the characters were so real and there, at the start you saw them all as these perfect people like richard did and then as he realised who they were so did we, they all had flaws and developed characters. whereas with iwwv while we did get a good amount of character insight its so much more just told to us by oliver rather than left for us to infer from moments. like were told that meredith is beautiful but is scared that's all she seen as because of a lesson in which she is made to talk about her strengths and weaknesses and that's what she says, like you're supposed to show not tell right? also i get that part of the whole point is that they get into the characters they play to much but then they just end up feeling like the archetype character rather than a real person, i don't know if my point is coming across but yeah anyway...
story:
one of the things this book seems to be praised for (at least compared to tsh) is how its more of a mystery, we don't know what happened and we're finding out with oliver, but again i feel like tsh manages to create a mystery despite telling us in the first sentence that bunny is dead. i do like the how the story is being told to an ex police officer as like the setting and having it set out as acts and scenes was fun, im not sure i liked the formatting of speech to be honest, i get it was supposed to emulate a play but having it just mixed in with prose was jarring. i did like the openness of the ending.
themes:
another thing i found was a lack of any themes, like with tsh you immediately know what ideas it's going to present, whereas throughout iwwv i didn't really feel as though there was any underlying ideas. i can see how some people would prefer that! having something lighter and definitely easier to get through is enjoyable. it took me two days to read iwwv while it took me about a month to slowly get through tsh, but again i think that's because in general i had a lot more thoughts and needed more time to process and understand tsh and ill definitely spend more time in the future thinking about tsh and will probably reread it at some point
anyways i really enjoyed both books but tsh is, i think, my favourite book
5☆'s for the secret history
3.75☆'s for if we were villains
#the secret history#if we were villains#spoilers#book review#very different to my usual reblogging of arsenal players looking babygirl#anyways yeah#:)
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What do you like about tlt? I wanted to like it but the first book never clicked for me. Was confused the whole time and I read like half the book. Looked online and and ppl said that you are supposed to be confused? And im like what??? I read gideon and dropped it way before the books blew up. Now, I'm on the fence about picking it up again. Tlt fandom seems unhinged and fun
I love this series so much it makes me want to gnaw off my own arm, so I tried to make a list that hopefully doesn't make me come across like this:
The writing. It's so good. And yes it is confusing on first read, I tried to start Gideon the Ninth years ago while coming off of general anesthesia the day of a major surgery and let's just say that was not the moment, but I knew I was going to love it when I would be in the right mindset to read it.
It's intentionally confusing, but the payoff is 100% worth it, and each book ends with a big revelation that shifts your perspective. But most of the confusion is about why things are happening, you do understand what is happening most of the time so you're never completely lost, you get the context for why things are happening along the way and it's masterfully crafted. You get so much out of rereading these books after getting more context in later books, because there are many breadcrumbs sprinkled throughout that you won't be able to pick up on until later. That might put some people off but if you like great world building and feeling like a detective, this is the series.
I read the books with a notepad next to me to write down my thoughts and important information.
The characters. Characters to love, characters to hate, characters to love to hate, characters you hate for making you laugh. All of the characters.
The humor. The biggest reason why I didn't care about the confusion next to loving the characters is that it's incredibly funny.
The audiobooks. My first read I listened to the audiobooks while reading along. This is the best way for me to read and stay focussed. Rereads by listening to the audiobooks are so enjoyable because the narration from Moira Quirk is amazing.
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hey if this is in any way invasive i apologize i do not mean to make you uncomfortable & obviously you do not have to answer…
for some reason the obsession i had with the iliad a year or so ago has come back full force & im looking everywhere for content lol so i was going through my likes and some tags and i found one of your posts about a gender hektor fic and fuck i got so excited lol i searched for it on ao3 & i didn’t find it so i guess it never got published
but i just had to ask did it ever get finished? what was it about?
anyway i love all of your work! youre a very talented writer and you’re literally carrying the hektor/andromache ao3 tag on your back !!!!!! so thank you 4 that
Ohhh this is very sweet, I'm so touched that you've found my writing so enjoyable and care to know more about it <3!!! Thank you so much for the kind words!
You're right, I never finished my Hektor gender fic so it hasn't been published. At the moment, I'm neck deep in another Very Long fic for a different fandom that I'm adamantly hoping I can finish, so I'm not currently working on this one. However, I am genuinely determined to finish it some day because I have a majority of it written, more of it planned out, and it means a lot to me. I reread the wip several weeks ago and there are a few small places I want to rework now, but I think it's very strong and it deserves to be finished up. Right now it's at ~18k words.
Essentially, the fic is a rather indulgent take with Hektor sometimes finding an urge to see himself in a new light, and grappling as that leads him towards more femininity. The initial idea rooted itself in the concept of gentleness and delicacy in the midst of a war, and how the extremities of war would really warp and alienate those concepts. I see Hektor struggling with gentleness, both as something he fears he doesn't deserve to receive anymore (alongside deeply longing for it in the midst of all the violence), and something he fears he's not capable of embodying in a meaningful way. The fic's mostly focused on him finding and longing for that in aspects of femininity, but also involves how that internal conflict shapes so many other parts of his life. I found the emotional core compelling enough to write, and even though looking at it through the lens of gender queerness is still quite indulgent and improbable, I do find it fits it surprisingly well, too. It’s also a Troy Wins au, because it felt a lot more satisfying to explore that way.
For you my friend, I'll share some excepts that I particularly like c:
“...you cannot keep shirking your duty ... why you feel the need to waste your time on jewelry and perfume and daintiness ... no- that’s not...you need to focus on the war on our doorstep...”
Hektor berates Paris for the nth time, even when he knows it’s no use. But his little brother simply refuses to muster himself and do what he needs to do to help the city. It makes their relationship grow more and more contentious.
That grieves him, in truth.
Hektor’s exasperation and increasing anger towards Paris is well familiar by now. It leaves him prickly and drained when they fight. Though, in the past months, he’s noticed something else and something new.
Not always, only in some particular moments, he feels something else towards Paris. The sight of him puts a tight, aching cinch in his chest. He can’t identify it, can’t prevent it. He tried once to allow for it, but when he opened his mouth, the feeling didn’t find its place in the words rebuking Paris for his avoidance of battle.
So now he always swallows down the inexplicable sensation, ignoring it, and hoping it will someday go away.
-
It’s quite difficult to grasp the full picture in the little mirror, so abruptly he tosses it aside and kicks around his big, bronze plated shield from where it rests against the wall.
The shape distorts the images somewhat, and the scratches obscure it, but in it Hektor sees himself donned in the flowing dress. His lips purse into a thin, tight line as he all but glares at his reflection. It’s not... repellant; in fact, on a solely surface level, he finds it kind of nice. But with that comes an overpowering feeling that he should not be wearing this. Much less have put it on himself. It may not be disgusting on him, but he is disgusting in it.
The cadence of his breathing has gone so strained and unnatural that a choked gasp escapes him as he hurriedly tugs off the dress. Hektor puts it back into Andromache’s chest as neatly as he can manage then reclaims his own clothes, and he hates himself for missing the sensation of the dress.
-
The feeling only grows as he lopes down the palace halls, distracted and thrown off track. No one he crosses paths with presumes to interrupt him, at least, until he bumps into Deiphobus, who always presumes he could use a disruption.
Deiphobus reverses direction to fall in step with him. “You look agitated,” he informs him bluntly.
“I am agitated,” Hektor growls.
“I was just about to guess that-! Ohh, I know you so well.” Hektor rolls his eyes. “Luckily for you, I have some wine that pairs perfectly with agitation, you just have to try it.” Slinging an arm across his shoulders, Deiphobus steers him towards his room and Hektor decides he could damn well use some wine right now.
Dei pours them both a cup once they reach his room. He sits, but Hektor stays on his feet as he takes a long, unceremonious draught before setting the wine aside, earning an amused snort.
“Do you think I would make a good king?”
Deiphobus cocks his head and he eyes him sharply. “Yeah,” he states like it’s obvious.
“Now?” Hektor clarifies demandingly. Dei furrows a brow, and Hektor can tell he doesn’t take his meaning. “Do you believe that as I am now?” he elaborates. “I’m not talking about when we were young, when I spent most all my time preparing to be king one day. For as anxious as I was about it then, even I ultimately believed I could be a good king. Maybe not great, but good.”
He juts his chin frustratedly to stretch the tight muscles of his neck. “That was a long time ago. Do you think the same holds true now?”
Deiphobus purses his lips in a thin, tight line, staring acutely at Hektor, watchfully. The piercing gaze is his only answer. Hektor waits as well for a minute. Then asks, “Do you think I’m a good warrior?”
Deiphobus blinks once. “Yes,” he replies.
“I think so too,” Hektor states. “Not just good, but great. And I’m beginning to fear what makes a great warrior, makes a bad king.”
-
Her fond attention weighs on him, not heavy but grounding. “You’re very pretty and I like you a lot. Anything after that would be redundant, really.”
Hektor turns his head and the clink of gold chimes in his ears and the cool touch of metal brushes his neck for a heartbeat. He tries to focus on the prickling in his fingers and the flutter of heart, he tries to glean something from his reaction, but it can’t hold his attention. Perhaps part of what’s stopped him from grasping the nature of his feelings is that the unfamiliar sensation of unfamiliar adornments keep him acutely alert and aware of himself. Their physical presence is demanding.
“How do you like them?” Andromache inquires. Hektor licks his lips and hesitates, unsure what he thinks. “How do you feel?” she offers instead.
“...Tense,” Hektor elects to answer. It’s not a condemnation, disparaging the experience. He doesn’t feel... uncomfortable, like he had before, like he expected to feel. Andromache’s company blunts the harshest sharp edge of his self loathing, though he is still tense.
“Well, that’s never all that uncommon for you,” she comments. That’s... true enough, really. Hektor is a bit prone to- oh, fine- extremely prone to tension and stress. He blames it on his raucous family, mostly.
He considers himself as objectively as possible. “Wearing these feels like I’ve been preened.” He picks the word as best he can. The finery feels like particular care has been doled onto him.
“Good, you deserve to feel pampered,” she declares heartily. The words catch Hektor off kilter. He takes in and releases a measured breath.
He wears the earrings for the better part of an hour until one snags his hair and he carefully removes them.
-
He exhales, then smiles softly and pecks another kiss to her skin. “You’ll want for nothing while you’re with child. I’ll give you anything and everything you ask.”
“Oh?” Andromache returns. When Hektor looks up and meets her eye, though muted by tiredness, he sees humor glinting there. “Do you mean to say that all this time before now, you’ve been willing to deprive me?”
Disguising the warmth running through his heart, Hektor sticks his nose up with a huff. “That’s such a harsh way to put it. I’ve always been willing to give you almost anything.” Andromache hums pointedly. “But yes, now that you’re pregnant, if you even go so far as to try to cheat again to suggest that the horses love you more than me...” He dramatically takes in and releases a deep, steadying breath. “I will let you.”
“Oh such noble sacrifices you’re willing to make for me now,” Andromache crows, rolling her eyes, “where did I find such a selfless husband?” She pokes the tip of his nose. “I have never once cheated to gain the horses’ favor- for your information- because I’ve never needed to. Every one of them loves me the most.”
Hektor pinches his expression and swallows like he’s forcing down something sour. Gazing at her, he bravely says, “Yes, of course they do, dear.”
Andromache snorts loudly and Hektor breaks with a wide grin. He snuggles up beside her and she drags up the blankets, shielding them from the chill. “I don’t think we can afford to stop competing over the horses. If they stop receiving their regular bribes, they’ll hate both of us.” Hektor hums in concession. “I fear that bodes ill for how spoiled our baby will be,” she muses.
Hektor tilts his head thoughtfully. “Oh, I don’t think it’s cause for worry. I think the horses turned out great, and the gods know they’re all just big babies.”
Andromache’s shoulders shake with laughter. “You’re a fool!” she informs him.
Hektor gazes at her dark eyes, his mind swimming with warm fondness. “A happy one,” he declares, and Andromache shivers then pulls him into a kiss.
-
He feels like there’s nothing of him left. He has no avocations. He barely has any friends, at least any that aren’t his family too. Not that they mean less to him, but his family above all he feels obliged to, always he has put them above himself. They have needed him to. He can never truly separate that from any one of them, despite- because of- his endless love for them.
Of the rest... several already died. His companionship with Polydamas started fracturing early in the war. When Podes would implore that they drink together, he had to decline so many times he eventually stopped asking. Only Eniopeus and Helen really put up with him still. (She’s technically family too.)
If he could be detached, severed from his responsibilities, his family, his home, Hektor imagines he’d simply fade away, hollow and untethered on his own. Hektor can’t define himself outside of Troy. Brother. Leader. Protector. Trojan. Troy Troy Troy.
He doesn’t feel... bitter about losing those parts of himself, after all, they’re worth nothing in the face of what he can- what he needs to do for Troy. And yet, that does little to keep him from feeling empty and pained at their absence. It leaves him wounded and wanting even as he tells himself over and over that things are better this way, that the needs of his people deserve his time and strength over his trifling wants. Every last piece.
But Hektor’s only mortal and a mortal heart is selfish and fragile.
#the iliad#hektor#hector of troy#my writing#answered ask#sorry its a touch late i was distracted this week#i have Unfinished Business with the iliad and im determined to come back to it in time#particularly for this fic and for the hektor character analysis essay i still want to write#i love these characters and i miss them wahh#ill be free once i finish my eragon fic some day 😤
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Got a goal for this year to read a book a month. Here’s my current progress-
January - The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue -DNF
Couldn’t do it. Everyone spoke so highly of it, but my goodness, I was halfway through the book before she thought to introduce me to the love interests! Something couldn’t just happen to Addie. It had to happen, then happen again, then happen again, before the author thought the point had gotten across sufficiently! I had to DNF.
February - Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy - fun!
I only read the first one, but it was good! It didn’t rock my world, but it was funny, and the satire landed well.
March - Scarlet (The Lunar Chronicles). - SO MUCH FUN.
Years ago I read Cinder, but it was time to try the next one in the series! Don’t get me wrong, parts of this were hokey. It was trope filled, it didn’t shock me - but it was so enjoyable. This is what I want from my fairy tale retellings. And from my leading men - I am not immune to feral boys with a tortured backstory.
April - Cress (TLC) - Fun!
Now that I’ve gotten back to the series I need to finish! Not as much fun as Scarlet, because it’s less of a woman falling in love with a man named wolf and pretending not to know it’s a bad idea. But it remained delightfully predictable to a degree while also making me laugh out loud in places.
May - Winter (TLC) - had me on the edge of my seat
Honestly my only critique is that with so many characters, sometimes things had to be glossed over that I thought could have more emotional impact. Or sometimes the parts that were necessary to tie in the fairy tale felt unnecessary next to the plot, more than the other books, in a way that the others didn’t. Maybe if there was 5 books - this one had been Snow White, and then the last one had tied everything together and had the rebellion and all the characters sharing focus equally. Then we’d have more bonding time for everyone. Other than that, action packed thrill ride that managed to keep up that fun fairy tale vibe - the last showdown scene was both thrilling and, out of context, amusing, because you have all these fairy tale characters attacking each other. I’d actually really recommend this series for fairy tale and sci fi fans like me.
June - no book this month, sadly. I just didn’t have time :( maybe I can do 2 in July?
July - The Innocent by David Baldacci - fine
No, im not falling behind on my goals; how dare you say so.
It was fine. I’ve never read this genre before but I love a good procedural style thriller show or movie. But spending twelve hours on a story where the ending is a bit obvious and there’s not much character growth… Is a lot. But I did enjoy it! Don’t know if I’d read more in this genre though.
August - A Murder is Announced by Agatha Christie - good!
She got me as usual! I did not guess the killer, though I did pick up on quite a few of the clues! Always enjoyable to read a good murder mystery - it’s a very “autumn” feeling even if it’s still hot outside — highly recommend!
September - Twilight - dare I say iconic
I read this book when I was around 13, maybe? But haven’t since, so I decided to reread it now since this month I was in Forks, WA. The thing about Twilight is, the book isn’t as cringe-funny as the movie — it’s just a normal YA romance with a paranormal twist. There’s an interesting story there about a boy struggling with self control and a girl with a neglectful mom who has learned to prioritize others over herself, learning to ask for what she wants. There’s tropes that are pretty popular. Love at first sight, the dangerous bad boy. It’s a fine book even if it’s not the kind I usually go for. I enjoyed it!
As if you could outrun me! As if you could fight me off! 🧛♂️🧛♂️
(Also I skimmed through a book called Ben and Beatriz. It was terrible.)
October - Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? By Philip K Dick - a bummer in places, good sci fi
A sci fi classic that definitely left me debating with my friend as to the themes and meanings behind it. I’d recommend it — though it is a bit of a downer bc of the dystopian world.
Second book in October… The Goblin Emperor by Katherine Addison - my favorite this year
Extremely good, if a slog to get through at first. The impossible number of names nearly threw me off, but I’m glad I pushed through to get to the fun part. It’s always nice to read a main character who is honestly flawed but relatable and intelligent. Also, I didn’t even try with the names. I keep calling Beshelar “Balthazar”. I’ve only had him, Cala, and Csevet for a day and a half, but if anything happened to them…
November - Guards! Guards! by Terry Pratchett - a great read
You ever read a book and halfway through you say “this author has got to be British. Hold up let me look it up”? Very funny and also fun to read but with a big, if cynical, heart. The writing was shockingly similar to Hitchhiker’s Guide and I’m glad to have finally dipped my toe into into Discworld. My favorite character was the Patrician. What a weird and off-putting dude!
Second book in November - All Systems Red by Martha Wells - really exciting, tight adventure
What if your iPhone could quiet quit? What if your roomba vacuumed but was like, annoyed about it and wanted to steal your wallet? That’s basically this book. Really good even if the ending was a bit abrupt.
December - Artificial Condition by Martha Wells
The roomba is on the loose and wants answers, but it’ll settle for murder. Better than the last one, very enjoyable!! It’s honestly taking on a action-thriller vibe (like the Innocent, I read that in July), but snappier and with a genderless main character who has trauma. Can’t wait to read the next.
Second Book in December - Rogue Protocol by Martha Wells
These are short, btw, and I’m trying to read them quickly so my roommate can talk about them. This one was also good. The character development was way more distinct in this one (Murderbot is a bit of a pouter), but the plot was less engaging. They really do feel more like tv episodes than books, so it’s hard to judge them independently.
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hello there, im still empty with the final chapter of eyem. i need more of cielito and miguel and i dont know what to do with my life now
still you and @thirstworldproblemss are amazing writers, you understand the character so well and you’re never out of character, always creating something new and loving
please you and @thirstworldproblemss keep writing, you’re one of the reasons i get out of my bed, and trying to improve in live. you inspire me a lot, thank you!
also, i wanted to ask something as well about red flags, another amazing fanfic, love how you developed marc’s personality, not just a grumpy man but also a lonely man without love that he deserves all the love in the world even if he doesn’t thinks he does
i love that marc was the one to fuck reader without the condom, even to willing to cum inside her
i remembered when reader wished that steven would cum inside her, to be able to feel him closely, and that was marc the one to do it, makes my heart melt with love, because he deserves to feel good, to feel save and be able to do it with the one who’ll love him forever
and it makes me think about the first time steven would cum inside her, fucking her raw, he wouldn’t be able to think about anything else but how good it feels, how good reader feels.
he would despise the idea of using condom again because now he thinks of it as a barrier that would separate him from reader, specially if, maybe, he does have a breeding kink
i would love it if you write something like that in the future, no matter if it’s a one shot or drabble, i’d love to read you vision about that idea or what you think, because you have such an amazing ability to write
again you two are amazing, every fanfic it’s like magic to me, i can believe there’s someone that makes me feel so much with their writing but you do
thank you!
Thank you lovely for this incredibly sweet and kind message.
Writing with TWP is such an absolute joy and i have said this before and will say it many times still, I love writing but writing with TWP is x10000 in terms of enjoyment and happiness. It's so nice to have someone to keep you company as you write as writing can be incredibly solitary, but with TWP I'm writing and hanging out with my best friend. It's a tonne of fun.
ALSO JESUS FUCKING CHRIST YOUR RED FLAGS ASK! the way I have read, and reread it! THe way I'm like combusting over here at that thought.
You will have both TWP and @the-ginger-hedge-witch to thank that Marc was the first to bust his nut inside, I originally wanted Steven to do the honours but TWP said in the first chapter that's a hard no!!!! then with chapter four I wanted a bareback scene and Ren absolutely vetoed it! And by then there weren't any in person sex scenes left until the final chapter with Marc, but it worked out wonderfully.
Also your suggestion of Steven's first time without condom with reader.... I HEAR YOU LOUD AND CLEAR! It's in my notebook for ideas for the White Flags sequel!! woof woof. Thank you so much for this ask lovely.
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heyyy hellaa, please tell us your favorite fics of all time, from any fandom, because i wanna know what makes your brain go vroom !!
WOULD LOVE TO OKAY:
haikyuu:
three sheets to the wind by fairycake - we have sakuatsu we have found family we have pirates we have a surprisingly coherent balance of plot and fun times we have a prank war we have miya twins content we have idiotic background sunaosa we have PIRATES there is literally nothing to dislike here when i read the description of this fic i thought it would just be dumbassery but it wound up being so much more and i got so attached so quickly and the ending was just so heartfelt if i could read this again for the first time i would
burden of blame by deathbelle - OUGH the writing of this one is just. jesus christ. atsumu's characterisation? kiyoomi's characterisation? protective miya twins? the miya twins interactions themselves? if you took away the yakuza angle id be CONVINCED this was all canon bc the author just Gets the characters. maybe my fav sakuatsu fic ever
the courtship ritual of the hercules beetle by kittebasu - iwaoi have entered the chat!!! one thing about me is i LOVE a good recurring metaphor, but a super niche one when you can tell the author knows their shit? respectfully i am drooling. this fic is just so raw and real and it really hit home for me and even to this day when i see it im all !!!!!! a must-read for anyone in the haikyuu fandom
jaywalkers by batman - multi-ship but im gonna say it was more gen for me than anything idk if that's just bc none of my big ships were in there (aside bokuaka <3) or if i just latched onto the gen aspects but yeah u really dont need to ship any of the couples in this to absolutely be blown away by this. like holy fucking shit. this is my last haikyuu rec but it is also my first and quite possibly my favourite fic of all time. if you read anything from this whole list, read jaywalkers. i have never had a fic impact me the way this did and ive never come back to a fic so many times as i have this one bc im very much one of those people that once ive read something i dont get much enjoyment from rereading it no matter how much i like it. but idk something about jaywalkers has me in a complete fucking chokehold and has done since i read it over a year ago. the way this author writes is just so effortlessly human? like it's funny and realistic and messy and in-character and BECAUSE it's got so much dumbassery it really hits you out of nowhere when the deeper shit comes in, but it still works perfectly. ive never seen a writer so perfectly capture humanity before. whenever im struggling to flesh characters out, i return to this work and see all the effortless ways this author does that, whether it be through kei's headphones or kuroo's hair or oikawa's chameleon or every tiny tiny detail that is important enough to warrant a mention bc it's what makes these characters real. im just. god. yeah. also the final author's notes actually made me tear up
jujutsu kaisen:
found in translation by hiraethia - kai kai kai kai. GOD all of kai's fics absolutely gut me but this one just really stuck with me. kai's got such a specific writing style where she just makes really poignant and beautiful metaphors flow very easily, so it's never jarringly deep until you actually take a second to think about what you just read and you're like what the fuck and then it very much IS that deep, and that means kai gets a perfect balance of fluff and fun as well as just heart-wrenching tear your hair out kind of angst, which ofc works perfectly for satosugu
two drifters, off to see the world by quietkids - you have to have a pretty strong stomach when it comes to angst if you're gonna ship satosugu and id say i qualify for that and i also very very very rarely cry over fics, but my god something about this fic just destroyed me. im too scared to read it again. i cannot even comprehend how devastated i was upon finishing this like it wasn't even the gross loud sobbing kind of devastated it was just this awful ache that followed me around for DAYS and that takes so so so much talent any and all kudos go to this author. the thing about college-era satosugu fics that anhialates me so much is the helplessness of it. it's all so tragic and 'there is no other version of this story'. you watch them try so hard to make it work and every time without fail you know it all goes wrong anyway, the love was there but it wasn't enough. and somehow this author just grabbed that sentiment and put it into words and i just. OW
at the end of the world by freckledgeto - hi two of the bestest jjk writers are my mutuals and im bragging about it. alia wrote the itafushi (+first year trio friendship) roadtrip au specifically to hurt me im sure of it. not to get into the incredible writing parallels of jjk, but just like their predecessors, itafushi is all about that helplessness, the knowledge of how this is going to end and still trying to fight it, but while satosugu is usually very deep and dark and heavy, itafushi are the younger, fresher version, and alia writes to accommodate that so seamlessly. it's fun and silly and they're so clearly KIDS in it, and it makes it all the more heartbreaking when it stops being so fun and silly. specifically itadori's character is done beautifully in this fic, but also megumi's characterisation gave me an entire new angle on him that id never had before. the whole thing makes me want to punch a wall
atla:
where the stars do not take sides by witchofendor - honestly any fic by this author is always so well-thought out like the worldbuilding is always INCREDIBLE, but i just lovedddd this fire siblings in this and just the whole concept of it. this is my canon. i actually really want to reread this fic when i get a chance
blue by blacklipscurse - this will always always be THE zukka fic in my opinion like just JKSHGKJSHDGJH i miss when this was updating. the zuko characterisation in this is beautiful zuko and iroh's relationship is beautiful but also one thing that really stuck with me from this fic is the fire nation girls' characterisation? like ive NEVER seen a fic get azula like this but also TY LEE really stuck out to me. like she WOULD be so terrifying with her cheerfulness while she literally attacked you and this is the first time i actually felt that
feels like we only go backwards by oldpotatoe - RUBY WE MISS YOU <3 the writing of this fic is absolutely exceptional like there's a reason this fic gets so much hype. the angst? the romance? the slowburn? the falling in love twice over? the sokka and katara moments? give it to me straight into my veins pls
ozymandias king of kings by think_of_a_wonderful_thought - the first zukka fic i ever read and it's really stuck with me. ive said before but this fic really inspired me and is the reason a lot of taob is the way that it is. i LOVE zuko's characterisation in this bc he's different to canon but in a way that makes perfect sense with the divergence we're given. i also really liked hakoda in this? like not that he was being mean to zuko but just that the author wasnt scared to make him a good leader in a REALISTIC way, aka very cynical towards a fire nation prince. you'd think it would be obvious but people get very aggy when you're mean to zuko lol
salvage by muffinlance - obligatory mention <3 beloved fic <3 what to say about salvage that hasn't been said before. it's just an absolute staple of the atla fandom and CREATED its own trope that i very much capitalised off. i just think the whole concept is so so brilliant and it's such a heartfelt fic. it'll always have a very special place in my heart
#missing so many fics that i love in order to make this pretty short but oh well#i read in other fandoms but it's just these three that seem to churn out the real chokehold fics#i also avoided one-shots for this list#here u go <3#ask#fic recs#haikyuu#jjk#atla
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leo valdez headcanons just because i can
beware my dodgy formatting (no spoilers-ish)
i had the revelation that leo valdez is essentially latino han jisung
they’re so similar it’s scary??
anyways i think that leo is a weeb and we were robbed of more gamer!leo content
leo is definitely an isekai enjoyer and he’s into the tsunderes (eg. asuka)
as a minor im gonna keep the nsfw headcanons in my brain LMAOO
leo gives me drum player vibes? like he seems like he has a really good sense of rhythm and if im not mistaken he’s known to always be tapping on something
generally id say that he can probably pick up any instrument with a little bit of hyperfixtation
piano player leo??? shit
i think it’s mostly emphasised that leo is a mathematical and engineering genius but damn can we talk about his artistic/linguistic skills?
he designed the argo II when he was FIVE. and built it when he was what, fifteen?
uncle rick’s magnum opus was thinking of wii controllers as the way leo steered the argo II
this makes me think that leo mods all of his devices lol he probably built a mario kart simulator for one of his younger cabinmates (a leo take on the classic racecar bed)
leo doesn’t get to use his fire abilities nearly enough :( his toolbelt kind of steals the show
or is it my vague memory of the series? dunno im gonna reread it this summer
anyways i can’t help but feel leo having a hammer as his weapon is a lil boring
i see him with a set of throwing knives that he probably lights on fire? awesome as fuck
leo my bilingual king? i headcanon that he learned his times tables in spanish (this is me projecting)
me encanta leo valdez porque él es muy gracioso, amable, y guapo LMAO (gcse spanish skills 😌)
leo is definitely a graffiti artist. every single wall in his workshop is some sort of mural
short king. definitely wears insoles
what i said earlier about the drums? that’s him sorting through his severe anger issues and crushing guilt woohoo
CORRECTION; according to the wiki he naturally understands greek as a demigod. damn
ok so i know that there are some like s-tier physical powerhouses on the argo II but leo can hold his own in a fight and he definitely moves like a dancer
dude fought a minor goddess 1 on 1 in HER turf and WON, while also killing low level monsters at the same time
we as a fandom are sleeping on my boy leo so much
im sorry but leo is such a malewife.
ouuu imagine if leo named festus feliz instead KYAAA THATS SO CUTE
i died a little inside when i found out two minutes ago that reyna calls leo “mi hermano” (my brother)
im literally pretending the angst doesn’t exist bc yeah. ok that’s it
thanks for reading c:
#leo valdez#leo valdez headcanons#kaz simps#heroes of olympus#percy jackson#pjo series#pjo hoo toa#pjo#hoo#toa#rick riordan
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Monster anon here...I'm sorry you hate it. I've been following your writing for years now (I'm just bad with names so I lose stuff like that) and I've always been a big fan. I came here for bucky, and I stay because I respect you as a writer. I don't really care about any of Pedro's roles (no shade) but I've really enjoyed your Moon knight writing. You're the only reason I ever started reading fic for them. So I just thought you should know, even if you find your old fics cringy or bad or not representative of you anymore (which I totally understand and support) it's still cherished and adored.
You should also know that the first time I read Blue, I had an existential crisis at the end and accidentally took my medication for a second time instead of the melatonin I meant to take because I was too preoccupied coming to terms with how to go on with life after reading something so beautiful. I still laugh about it several years later.
So here's to several more years of smiling every time a Pedro fic comes by that I'm probably not going to read, but it makes me happy because you wrote it. Who knows, maybe one day our fandom obsessions will converge again ❤️
anon, this is an incredibly kind message thank you so much, im glad that you still get enjoyment out of my older fics even if they no longer represent me/make me cringe - its the reason i haven't deleted them, i just don't know who rereads what and what's something that's comforting for someone else.
thank you again 💕
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LUCAS AS IN LUCAS BAKER!? IF HIM GOOD LORD THANK YOU THERE HAS BEEN A DROUGHT AND IM THIRSTY
Penny wasn't sure what she was doing with Lucas.
What had initially been an unfortunate traffic collision - her being too shortsighted to see which lane she was in - had blossomed into a solid friendship.
What kind of guy tried to pick up someone that put a dent in a fucking Plymouth? But after a couple of awkward phone calls to talk about insurance, Penny let Lucas come by her place to fix her fender. Free of charge, he'd said with a huge fucking grin that was somehow charming on what she'd thought at first to be a pretty creepy face.
He took whatever she'd been baking in the oven that day as payment. Lemon scones? Penny couldn't remember, but she vividly remembered the text she got that night about how good they were and how much the compliment meant coming from someone so skinny and… borderline disagreeable.
'Your instructor is an asshole who don't know what he's talking about. These things are better than fried gold. I had to fight off fucking gators on my way home. Even them bastards know a good thing when they smell it.'
She might have developed this crush on him that night, blushing as she reread his text throughout the evening. It made her feel warm and fuzzy for a few hours after the fact. Lucas was just as awkward as he was unfiltered, and while he seemed like an asshole, he wasn't one to her, and that, too, made her feel pretty special.
Plus, Lucas could eat like a one-man army, and even if she fucked up a new assignment or some weird recipe, he was always eager to eat it up. And he liked everything she made… which, given the few times Penny had burnt the goods, she knew couldn't have been true but appreciated the compliments either way.
With the pizza ordered and the sofa jammed with a couple extra pillows, Penny transferred the hot cheesecake crescents over to the cooling rack, grinning when they barely deflated.
"I am fucking majestic," she muttered, adding little shakes of sugar to the tops after they got a bit above room temperature, finishing off the whole thing with a couple sliced strawberries.
She hadn't mentioned these bad boys to Lucas, hoping instead to see the look of delight on his face when he walked in and smelt them. With a nose like his, it wasn't any wonder he ate with it half the time. If it smelt good, he ate it, but before they got ruined in his gorge, she snapped pictures for her blog and licked up some sugar dust from her thumb.
She was fawning over Lucas a bit, she realized. Fucking fawning. But there wasn't anyone else she knew that well in this town, and it was lonely, and Lucas seemed about as lonely as she was, so no harm, no foul… except Penny was starting to do the dumb girl thing her mother always told her about - about how if ya wanted to get into a man's heart, you had to start with his stomach. It was all pretty harmless at first, sort of unconscious, but Penny realized what she was doing a few weeks ago and shrugged, deciding the implication wasn't awful.
Unconsciously or otherwise, she'd been acting more like a potential girlfriend than a friend, minus all the sexy stuff. But something told her there were other ways to do that with Lucas that'd be more enjoyable than muffins and pies… or scones and daydreams under her sheets or in her bathtub.
Penny blushed, trying to ignore the self fucking she'd been up to that morning - Lucas on the brain.
He didn't say anything a friend wouldn't say. Lucas kept that male drive hidden behind bored expressions and shitty jokes, but it wasn't subtle when he broke face and checked out her breasts or backside. Nor was it infrequent enough to play off as just wandering-eye syndrome, a common affliction of all straight men. No, the looks said he'd probably jerked off to her at least once, which made her feel a little less weird about the fact that she'd started masturbating with him in mind.
She assumed the mutual attraction was making Penny do silly things like this - like baking extra treats she wasn't obligated to for school. She just wanted to see him happy, and the boy had a fucking mouth on him, and a tongue that could reach down and lick off anything sweet his lips had missed.
The new shorts and v-neck sweater were another of those impress-Lucas-at-all-cost actions.
He liked the way she was put together, and maybe his interest and compliments and 'hanging out' was all an act just to get into her pants, but even with the eye fucks, Penny decided his attentions were genuine, which just made her more excited to get a rise out of him tonight.
Lucas liked her, which was great because she really, really liked him, and while it wasn't implied outright. The fact that she'd invite him over to watch Netflix - literally said it in her text, along with food and 'chilling' - hopefully expressed her hopes for the evening.
The last time they met up - when he fixed her disposal unit - Lucas kept doing this thing with his lips. They would purse up then spread out in a sly line whenever she handed him the tool he'd asked for, accompanying the trade-off with a snappy 'that's what she said' joke.
Penny wanted to kiss him that day but bit her lip instead.
Tonight she was going to test the waters herself and see if Lucas was into her or if his roaming eyes were just appreciative and nothing more. She'd had a few guy friends who were asexual and one she'd embarrassed herself in front of. Penny didn't want to make any assumptions… no matter how horny Lucas had been making her or how horny she assumed she was making him.
When the pizza arrived before he did, she got impatient.
Lucas answered her phone call on the third ring, sounding a little… off, maybe a bit breathless but intact. He wasn't dead in a ditch somewhere, so that was good.
"Did you forget about me? She asked, laughing to cover up the fact that she'd thought he might have for a second.
"Pfff, naw. Jus' hit some pissbags taking up the road like a couple ah' bitches holdin' hands. Like other people ain't got places to be, right?"
"You should have just mowed them down," she joked, listening to his verbal agreement as she plunked down on the sofa. The TV screen was frozen on the opening credits for 'Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers,' casting a sick blue glow amongst the buffet of croissants, pizza, chicken tenders, and soda.
"Mother fuckers deserve worse 'an that."
"Yeah, you could keep them waiting on a Friday evening while the pastries they made go cold," she mused, picking up one of the fat, heavy delights with a smirk. Lucas made a cute little whine on the other end as a car horn went off.
Inside her ear, Lucas growled like a man on a murder spree. The distant sound of tires squealing and another car horn blaring made her bite her tongue to not giggle at him.
"Ah'll be there in two minutes! No, no, no! Thirty seconds, hehe'haha… ah' jus' ran the light at fifth street."
"Uh… " Penny straightened up, springing from her sofa towards the window by the door. She peeked through her blinds, cutting the aluminum blades with two fingers and a wide eye. The dude was crazy, she thought, hearing his mad cackles through the phone until she could hear them through the meat of her home and the rumble of his Plymouth.
"Damn, Lucas… you're unstoppable."
"Don't ah' know it, baby," he hounded into her ear, sounding much like he had that day before he'd seen her come out of her car. That rage-filled tone was, at one, joyous and malicious.
Penny fucked herself to the memory of that tone the other night, and it took an ass load of willpower to get the blush off her cheeks by the time he was jogging up to her door, nearly sprinting. He was already stuffing his phone back in his pocket, but when she opened the door, she still had her own held up to her ear - still just a bit startled and admittedly curious as to who he ran off the side of the road just to get here a few minutes early.
Lucas slapped his heels on her doorstep, grinning under his dark hood like a monster straight outta the swamp. It might be that Lucas' monster man persona sorta triggered some of her more… seedy intentions because honestly, right then - as he threw her a toothy grin and wedged his way into her house - she wanted him to throw her over his shoulder and toss her on her bed.
"Man! Don' let my Mama know you can cook so fucking good… pretty sure it'll break 'er heart."
Penny swallowed thickly, inhaling a dense cloud of male musk and something sharp like pine cologne. The idea of Lucas spriting on smelly stuff made her smile. He made a throaty sound of pleasure and made a straight beeline for the couch, throwing down on the edge of the sofa so he could stuff a croissant into his mouth. Yeah, the boy could eat - that was for sure.
After locking the door, Penny made her way to the sofa with an extra sway, but Lucas was too focused on the pastries she'd baked to look. So much for cockblocking herself, she thought. "So… did you kill anyone on your way in? Should I be on the lookout for cops? - disgruntled drivers, maybe?"
"Naw, jus' cut a few fucks off," he mumbled, downing a whole pastry and chasing it with a swig of soda. He caught her eye as she sat down, and it took nearly everything not to smirk when his gaze dipped down to her breasts and the deep line of cleavage. Someone with breasts as large as her own couldn't get away with anything lower than a crew cut without some bust poking through, but this wasn't like the times she'd gone around unintentionally showing skin - this top was meant to show off some tit… and she had more than enough of those. A blessing and a curse, but more often than not, a curse.
Penny took a deep breath, feeling her skin dimple around the neckline, and reached for a slice of pizza.
"Good! 'Cause I heard this movie really sucks, so I don't wanna miss a second of it," she told him, flashing him a tender grin before hitting play and stuffing some food in her mouth. It didn't escape her notice that he'd started blushing - started sneering at himself shortly after while trying to watch the credits in the same head tilt as he did her tits. The apparent dilemma he faced - her breasts or the film - was making her stomach do backflips. Give her any other guy ogling her assets, and she'd have been insulted, but there was something about Lucas finding her physically appealing that worked for her.
Even when she first met him, Lucas stuck her as a guy hard to please. The fact that he was showing appreciation, trying to angle his hips, so the semi under his jeans wasn't evident, was flattering. Also, it was the reaction she wanted out of him.
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2023 Book Recap!
i really figured out this year what i like and don't like in a book i think, at least for scifi/fantasy books.
that ursula le guin quote about genre:
"Ignoring all this, our novice is just about to reinvent the wheel, the space ship, the space alien, and the mad scientist, with cries of innocent wonder. The cries will not be echoed by the readers. Readers familiar with that genre have met the space ship, the alien, and the mad scientist before. They know more about them than the writer does."
& something one of the boys on the stephen king podcast said, where he described being familiar with a genre or medium as seeing the seams, and then a bit later as being like an erector set, where you can see all the pieces.
and that's really it, like bc i have read so much scifi and fantasy, every novel is an erector set. i know what the pieces of the kit are, and what they're supposed to build, so i can recognize when its built well and when its built poorly, and i can recognize when someone does something really cool and different with those kit pieces. but if someone doesnt do anything good or interesting with them, its just a pile of pieces, and that's not enough for me.
so, in descending rating order, books i read this year:
5/5:
The Broken Earth Trilogy by N K Jemison: spectacularly original worldbuilding, heartwrenching story, delightful narrative devices. getting added to the favorites shelf with Baru.
The Three Body Problem by Liu Cixin: very fun hard scifi book. if i don't have to google a math concept while reading your scifi book im not interested. i have not yet read the sequels but will.
Machineries of Empire Trilogy by Yoon Ha Lee: great military space opera with REALLY cool novel worldbuilding (the technology of the empire functions because of a high calendar maintained by ritual sacrifice!!!) and very neatly executed plots.
4/5:
How The Light Gets In by Louise Penney: perfectly enjoyable mystery novel i read to bond with my mother. old ladies who saw it sitting next to my register at work were at first delighted i was reading it and then aghast that i was reading one from the middle of the series out of order.
Dead Silence by S A Barnes: fast-paced scifi psychological horror, delivered exactly what i was expecting.
Mistakes Were Made by Meryl Wilsner: doctor mechanic fic with the serial numbers scrubbed. also exactly what it says on the tin.
Plain Bad Heroines by Emily M Danforth: fun gay story that jumps around in time and has several cool narrative styles including whatever it is where there are in-universe texts included with the story narrative.
The Luminous Dead by Caitlin Starling: scifi cave-diving survival horror with a homoerotic relationship between the caver and her handler. loses a star for an underwhelming ending but overall it ruled i love survival books.
Blindsight by Peter Watts: this book made me the maddest a book has made me since i read The Word for World is Forest in high school and got so upset at one of the characters that i made myself nauseous. on the one hand the worldbuilding was very intricate and interesting and its a truly fascinating first contact story, and on the other hand i want to fight the author in a parking lot for how eco-fascist and misanthropic the thesis statement is. this book pissed me off but its also going to be something i will reread and also think about for a long time, and for that it can get a 4.
3/5:
The Archive Undying by Emma Mieko Candon: cool far-future post-apocalypse with ai gods, about bodily horror and autonomy when youre dealing with high tech divine possession. good book but not for me.
This Is How You Lose The Time War by Max Gladstone and Amal El-Mohtar: fine, underwhelming. novel equivalent of a montage and the prose didn't wow me.
Acceptance by Jeff Vandermeer: made me realize what i want from him is an actual ecology book i would love that but i hate his fiction.
The Cartographers by Peng Shepherd: would have been higher if it had a stronger conclusion, fun concept though and it was fun to see the ways it referenced Hill House. speaking of:
The Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson: alright, i havent read enough horror to know what i like but this wasn't it, im glad i read it though.
2/5:
Stories of Your Life and Others by Ted Chiang: fine, none of the story concepts were compelling to me so it was hard to like any of them, though the Tower of Babylon was fun.
The Long Way to a Small Angry Planet by Becky Chambers: no stakes, boring, no thought put into the politics of the setting or the plot.
Authority by Jeff Vandermeer: absolute fucking slog of a book with a boring protag.
She Who Became The Sun by Shelley Parker-Chan: i dont like historical figures rewritten to be lgbt, i think the pacing and tone was inconsistent, and if youre going to write a book about a military campaign you need to actually care about writing military engagments and logistics. also as my friend Jake said. for a novel trying to do something with gender, there sure arent very many women.
1/5:
none apparently!
#bookposting#my posts#apparently i read annihilation the year before bc it wasnt in my bookposting tag and i started that at the beginning of this past year#i like keeping track of my books like this! its fun#also some of these are slightly diff ratings than i initially rated them bc some i posted right after reading and then thought about more#and liked them less lol#posting this at fucking 2:23 am. no one will see this.#also thats 22 books! almost 2 a month#thats more than i thought
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hi!! I saw a rec list of yours where you were like, "i actually have more but some of them are just the real popular ones so im like. Yeah youve read it." -- but I HAVENT!! I'm brand new to cherik and looking for those ultimate recs, those smash hits. could you rec some ultimate cherik fic, if you have the time? i'm not big on fluff but anything too cutesy but otherwise I'm totally open!!! thank you in advance!
hiii :D i would absolutely recommend you to also browse the tag filtering it by kudos because i tend to filter out some things and i also tend to be picky with stuff so there's probably Smashing Hits(tm) i overlooked bc i was like 'nahh im not in the mood today' and my god there are so many good authors and fics that probs go undiscovered by ME. so do make sure you don't miss out on Those Hits
that being said i went through my bookmarks and i'm grabbing those ones with thousands of kudos (bc to me A Lot of Kudos are anything over 100 but i know some cherik fics have liek 5k or more so. i rec going thru the tag fr) so if i repeat myself from the other recs im very sorry but teehee here you go!!!!
these are all like. well. they don't have major trigger warnings or bad endings so enjoy
two lonely souls in a fish bowl by blarfkey: this is really more centered around pietro and erik but the cherik in it is mmmmmwah and also it's jsut so fucking good if you need to scratch that itch of 'damn i wish pietro had told erik he was his dad' like the rest of us. it's so so so good and IT'S A WHOLE SERIES SO CHECK THAT OUT THEY'RE ALL SO GOOOOD.
been there, done that by asyouwish: time loop fic! fucking love that. erik gets stuck in a timeloop before the cuba thing happens. i love seeing littl emen suffer trapped in time
i don't want to wake up on my own anymore by pocky_slash: my bookmark tag here says 'something about erik sleeping' so i reread it and i was like oghggoghg erik sleeping....so YEAH.
orphans of forgetting by pocky_slash: AHGP okay this one's fucking good listen to me. i like men going through emotional trials that fucks them up but gives them an emotionally fulfilling result. this fics good
the pretender by clocks: au where erik fake proposes to charles to get free food. they're still mutants. apparently i bookmarked this one saying 'im going to cry' and now i remember i was jsut really emotional that day and there was no reason to cry as it is a very good and funny fic. help
the whole world wants what we're on by waketosleep: and there was only one bed!
mi casa, su casa by zairaA: i love this one. it's so fun to read. charles moves into his new apartment only to find out erik already lived there. i love this fic.
shalom malakh by zairaa: ive read this oen so many times and only now ive connected the dots that it's the same author. david haller is in this fic. 10/10 showstoppin gi love MY BOYYYYYY !!!!!! but other than that it's so fucking good. what's better than coming back from the dead to haunt ur loved ones AM I RIGHT..
still life with cookies by ren: this one's cute. like a romcom. the pining on this one is so good and enjoyable i liked it so much
a nice boy (the family matters edition) by pocky_slash: IVE RECCED THIS BEFORE. BUT LIKE 2 WEEKS AGO I REREAD IT AND I CRIED SO LIKE HERE IT GOES AGAIN
x marks the spot by the hoyden: i fuckign lvoe this fic. every time i reread it i blink and it's over even though its like 20k words but it's jsut THAT good!!!!
the courtship by danveresque: what's better than canon characters cherik. REINCARNATIPON FICS . fuck my life thsi fic stresse dme out so bad but it was so good. i love it.
never too late to be who you might have been by acetamide: charles and erik wake up in the future (the 2000s timeline movies) and only remember up until what they know before the cuban missile crisis. chaos but also sweet shit :)
tessellation by nekosmuse: i feel like ive mentioned this one before. no MATTER. it's GOOD. IT FUCKS ME UP SO BAD. it does messes with comic canon and also the xmen animated series so it's PERFECT FOR ME and i really do feel it's a classic. liek. 3k kudos should attest for a classic yeah. magneto is a charles xavier enjoyer. they meet. fall in love. Shit Happens. but like it's my favorite.
i think those are all the fics i have that are over 1k kudos long weeps.. again i SUPER encourage you to filter it by kudos when you go the charles/erik tag bc there are SO many fics with SO much content so please enjoy! i accidentally opened the tag and filtered it on august 2021 and i keep going through it. 2 years later yeah. i'm in like page 157 of it. we all make mistakes. but thank you for the ask and i hope you enjoy! :)
#asks#see most of the time im in the mood for really specific cherik but i hope this helps u I KNOW THERES PROBABLY LOTS OF LIKE#FICS IM MISSING THAT IVE ALSO READ AND ENJOYED AND FORGOT TO BOOKMARK LOL#BUT PLS ENJOY...theres so much fic for this ship. a feast truly
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