#fantastic time revisiting and i love to be considering all these characters all the further / with reckless juxtaposition

[unproduciblesmackdown]

reread the rest thus far of lackadaisy and there's the both v easy & difficult task of gathering a shit ton but only a shit ton of excerpts (like every single page is a highlight i'm not exaggerating)

and every single element is superlative and the way it all only becomes More So....already mentioned the way the like smooth gradient shading made the successful evocation of 3D Shapes more noticeable, along w/the consistent geometries of character design & details in fabric folds; the way Lighting & Coloring only goes on to become more prominent elements only enhances that further. the compositions, backgrounds, pacing, angles....everything is so dynamic & expressive, such as including the expressions which you know i also Love / absorbed

going "hell yes for people to discover this superlative comic" then having to occasionally refresh past site traffic overloaded server errors like "nooo" but actually yes

whilest clapping & cheering for the fun of everyone who's been here a minute. My God the invigorating reward when again i started reading in '07 & the concept of rocky & freckle on a "proper" run had only manifested via fun official bonus art, then a literal decade later as it was actually happening in the comic like screeeeaammm i can feel it coming in the air tonight oh lord etc....i've loved following it, again, if i see another new comic page. i am going to be Enriched

i also really was right on the ball myself this time around like okay okay yep i have picked up on Everything, at least to the degree i can lmao. i love the mysteries. i love how Character Focused it is too ofc and there's no characters i'm uniterested in / dislike. you gotta point to one of them, truly, and i have been a [pointing at freckle] enjoyer these fifteen years but fr i am a connoisseur of everyone, i love that so many characters are a weird mysterious chaos element story driver in their own right. i considered mordecai more intently than ever, love his like ultra mystery (and that we leave off on him doing some detectiving even) and truly fun that like, the source of the more Immediate problems he keeps having in every damn interaction isn't the like [wow mordecai with the just diving into the hatchet murdering] factor so much as it's that he's generally like "i am just standing here" and is not nt in any way that matters and people insist on fucking with him on that front. the peak tragedy of him in a bonus comic getting bullied into having to dance with someone to Be Polite like i'm so sorry i wish you could be that ficus too. anyways intrigued with the marigold &/or mordecai mysteries including that it's like, how coincidental is it that he talks about marigold having a thorn in its side & the savoys' nickname for him is peekon = thorn. there is so much to consider, love that for us truly. and i'm rooting for mordecai & nicodeme's dynamic out here, is another conclusion....very enriched by comparing & contrasting that serafine nicodeme mordecai triumvirate with the rocky ivy freckle one, to be sure. im enriched

i'm also enriched by every footnote that's got like historical facts / research notes / [this is inaccurate for xyz prioritization but here's the disclaimer] explanations. i Love information. and everything else like i loooove this comic it's Soooo Fucking putting my hands to my temples and inhaling at length through my teeth

#first time i've really taken tumblr up on that new thirty image limit expansion; bit of a surprise maybe lol #put your back into autism acceptance month &/or press j; scroll fast; read through it actually; filter the following: #long post // #learning abt the overwhelming popularity of baby ruth candy bars from lackadaisy footnotes? relevant to gtm:pota aficionadoship at one pt #remember discussing what i learned from another footnote abt some christian denominations / other religions being very Anti Prohibition #every time i use the word cagey i think of lackadaisy. cagey thing... we've all been there #fantastic time revisiting and i love to be considering all these characters all the further / with reckless juxtaposition #especially the two triumvirates as mentioned. rooting for them all #rooting for mordecai to be relieved of that v realistic [ppl sensing a Mess With His he is not nt in any way that mattersness Free For All] #either let him be or start shooting at him lmfao. but i Love that the gang had that pleasant nonbrunch together & no shots exchanged yet #more brunches! and i think nicodeme could be mordecai's bestie or w/e he wants. turn out to be Supportive in any way that matters #they are more so the ivy and freckle of their group after all lol. slightly would-be Unlikely coupling there as well anyways; and yet! #i am as enriched and intrigued and appreciative and etc as ever #and reminded that in my rereading i haven't yet gone over all the bonus material lol.... #also stumbled across that sungwon cho had fandubs of lackadaisy comics posted like 9 yrs back?? #which means i probably saw one or two; think i remember one being shared and checking that out #like hey didn't know i'd encountered you before like; vines & oh the lamps are fucking & etc. and now there he goes voicing mordecai yaay #lackadaisy

[ficsyoumayhavemissed]

it’s only for the brave — sunflower_lwt / @hometothecanyonmoon

2.247 words / Liam x Tom Daley

My love, all I want is to protect you. I gave my heart to you a long time ago and I never got it back. I love you, I adore you, I love who I am when I’m with you.

Always in my heart, Tom Daley.

Yours sincerely,

Liam Payne.

This fic somehow manages to be a journey of emotion in so few words. There’s so much fear and angst over a love possibly lost, a future left uncertain, and a past full of regret. But the author leaves the story open-ended, closing off with a little room for hope. 

i’ll meet you anytime you want (in our italian restaurant)  — alwaysgolden / @hsmp3

3.239 words / Harry x Louis

harry and louis reunite after ten years in their favorite restaurant, reminiscing about the past and revisiting old feelings.

This absolutely adorable fic is the author’s first published work (thankfully, they have posted more since!) and while it’s fairly short, it’s an absolute treasure. The shyness and nostalgia between the two friends blend into a perfect atmosphere that’s sure to keep you smiling the entire time you read. (Warnings: mentions of death)

It's Poutine Bitch! — @haztobegood

3.950 words / @harryandmenfest / Harry x Mitch Rowland

“What is that?”

“This?” Harry pointed his fork at the plate. “It’s poutine.”

The man gazed longingly at the heaped plate. “Looks good.”

"Go ahead and take one, bitch.”

Everything about this fic is absolutely hilarious! From the title over the narration to the dialogue – it’s absolutely wonderful. Go ahead and read this feel-good-fic if you need something to cheer you up, a bit of a laugh, and a story that will make you feel warm.

baby I'll never leave (if you keep holding me this way) — we_are_the_same / @so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed

6.438 words / @1dclicheficfest / Harry x Louis 

His fingers curl around the first thing he can find that would be suitable as a weapon, an umbrella that has a rather impressive looking metal pin at the end. He holds it in front of him the way he imagines people hold a sword, tiptoeing through his living room until he can find whoever’s in his kitchen. He briefly considers calling 999, figures that if someone’s trying to burgle him, he should probably not be a hero and actually rely on professionals to arrest them, but he’s never been the type to sit back and wait, and -- is that singing?

It is singing. Whoever is trying to rob him is in his kitchen, singing an eighties pop song under their breath.

And they made cookies?

All about this fic is beautiful. The author has made a wonderful impression of the character development – plus it’s hilarious and cute. It portrays a ray of hope for everyone struggling with the current worldwide situation bringing an ‘everything’s gonna be fine’ message to the reader. Give it a chance!

It’s Probably Because I’ve Got a Big Lesbian Crush on You — yeah_alright / @uhoh-but-yeah-alright

6.614 words / @wordplayfics / Harry x Louis

Harry's never really concerned herself with being part of the popular crowd. But as the new girl in school the second semester of her junior year, she finds herself unwittingly competing for Queen Bee status against high school royalty Louis Tomlinson. Maybe there's more to their rivalry than it seems.

A not-quite-Mean Girls AU

Are you in need of a sweet, interesting, and funny Girl!Direction fic that you won’t be able to put down? Look no further: This fic has it all! Just the essence of Mean Girls with the perfect amount of the author’s own twists and turns that will leave you smiling all the way through! 

sweet music playing in the dark — solvetheminourdreams / @solvetheminourdreams 

12.753 words / Harry x Louis

“Just get in.”

“I don’t even know you,” Louis continues lightly, hand already inching toward the door.

Harry laughs, shaking his head. “No, but I’m willing to take the risk if you are.”

Or the one where Harry wants nothing more than to hear From Eden live and Louis just needs to pay off some parking tickets.

This fic is a great mixture of humorous and sweet! Louis’ characterization is just great, and the chaos of the plot is very fun. A must read for those days you need something a little unexpected to make you smile. 

light somewhere, in the distance — wordsnnotes / @quelsentiment​ 

26.011 words / Zayn x Liam x Louis

“You’ll be paired up with one partner in each place.”

Zayn frowns.

“A partner?”

“Yes, that’s the way it goes,” the angel nods. “Everyone gets a partner. Sometimes it’s people from your previous life, if you used to be together or could have been together if death hadn’t separated you. But most times, it’s not someone you know. In any case, we’re always very careful about pairing up people who are compatible together.”

Or: a Zouiam love triangle set in the afterlife. Loosely based on The Good Place

This fic is so intense in the best way: it gives you the chance to shed a few tears on a bad day while giving you the warmest hug at the end to make sure you’re alright. The worldbuilding in The Good Place fashion is done fantastically and it matches the relationship developments so well. It’s definitely worth a read.

—-

As always, support the authors by leaving kudos and comments! Happy reading!

If you love a fic that has gotten less love than you think it deserves, submit it to us so we can check it out and add it to one of our recs! We would love to be able to spread more love to underappreciated fics! — FYMHM xx

#hlcreators #tracksintheam #trackinghome #trackinghappily #hljournal #hlsource #fic rec #fymhm #september 2021

[marshmallowgoop]

Magic Kaito vs. Magic Kaito 1412

I’m not sure if I ever finished all twelve episodes, but I first watched at least a handful of the original Magic Kaito specials about a decade ago, and I remember really enjoying them. Superhero stories are among my favorites, and while both Magic Kaito and its sister series Detective Conan overlap with the genre in various ways—after all, Conan’s glasses were literally inspired by Clark Kent—Kaito’s flashy costume alone pushes his adventures more in that direction. So, maybe it’s no wonder that, back in the day, I kind of considered Magic Kaito my preferred series of the two.

Recently, I’ve got a reignited interest in the DCMK world (evidently). And it’s not a bad time to have a reignited interest, because English-language accessibility for this universe is much better now than it was ten years ago. Conan’s getting new movie dubs, and Kaito’s newer, expanded TV series, Magic Kaito 1412, is freely available on Crunchyroll. Obviously, I had to give it a shot.

I wasn’t impressed. Far from it. I chalked up my old fondness to nostalgia goggles. Kid the Phantom Thief is simply more enjoyable in Detective Conan than in his own thing, I figured.

But a few weeks ago, those old specials went up on Crunchyroll Germany. And it took me a while, but I finally decided to figure out the truth, once and for all. Have my tastes totally changed, or has Magic Kaito anime not always been Like That?

I was impressed. I watched all of one episode, and I enjoyed it so much more than 1412.

Which surprised me! Just examining the first episodes of both series, they’re honestly practically identical. They cover the same story beats almost exactly. Kaito’s introduction is even consistently him being disgusting to Aoko—behavior that, nauseatingly, convinced me that Mineta of the My Hero Academia series would actually be adored if he were conventionally attractive.

But as it turns out, that’s relevant to why the original Magic Kaito strikes me as far more palatable. Kaito’s actions towards Aoko are still indefensible in the old special, but he doesn’t repeat them on his teacher, and there are repercussions. Unlike in 1412, Kaito doesn’t get away with his harassment because his teacher finds him charming; in fact, Aoko even later notes that he “should be thankful [he] [wasn’t] expelled,” implying that he was indeed punished harshly for what he did. While Aoko assures Kaito’s mother that he didn’t get in trouble in 1412, in the original special, it’s clear that being cute isn’t enough to give him a free pass for disrupting class and being gross.

Further, in a more general sense, the tone of both series is of course goofy overall, but the characters in the old Magic Kaito feel much more like human beings than the cartoonish caricatures portrayed in 1412. A scene especially missing from the new show is a quiet one where Kaito and Aoko walk together after school. With the sun hanging low in the sky and a sparkling river flowing beside them, Kaito expresses his disappointment in how his magic trick didn’t exactly end as planned. “I guess I need to work on my finale,” he bemoans, but Aoko is more concerned with why he feels the need to pull these ridiculous stunts in the first place.

She quickly gets her answer. One of the exuberant little kids who had run by them earlier falls over and cries, and Kaito doesn’t hesitate to cheer him up with magic. And Aoko watches. She sees the way the little boy’s face lights up. She sees how he runs off again with renewed energy. And she smiles. She doesn’t say it, but the audience gets the message.

Oh. That’s why Kaito’s a magician. That’s why Aoko walks by his side.

I won’t claim to fully comprehend Kaito’s character. I haven’t read the manga, it’s been years since I’ve seen more than the first episode of these old specials, I’ve only watched about 20% of 1412, and for as much as I’ve been posting about Detective Conan lately, I’m (maybe humorously) about the farthest thing from current and would only be able to tell you about Kid’s first appearance in that show. But when Kaito returns to his empty home in the original series, and when he announces that he’s there to nobody at all, and when he welcomes himself back, all with a smile and a cheerfulness to his tone, I deeply feel his loneliness. I feel the weight of his lost father. I feel that, even if some of his tricks are inappropriate and inexcusable, he does them because he wants to make people laugh. He doesn’t want anyone to feel as sad and alone as he’s felt.

Maybe I missed it, but I didn’t get any of that from Magic Kaito 1412.

And they’re small things, they really are. But they make a world of difference. Even Jii, who really only becomes more than just a mysterious figure in the episode’s closing minutes, feels more like a tangible person in the special. He loudly gasps for breath after performing the magical, fantastical feats of his old friend, and it’s such a tiny, minuscule detail, but when watching, I feel it so strongly. I literally understand the strain of Toichi’s loss on Jii, too.

Beyond narrative decisions—and there are others that I much prefer in the old series, such as how Kaito links his failed magic trick to his father’s “poker face” philosophy, and how Kaito uses a successful variation of his earlier trick to escape the police as Kid the Phantom Thief—I also just simply prefer the original art style. Magic Kaito 1412 is slick and shiny and modern, but in being so, it strikes me as much more generic than the older-styled 2010 special. Shot compositions also feel more powerful in the first anime; just consider how differently the two series handle what is arguably the emotional height of the entire episode:

[Image descriptions: A series of four comparison images examining how the 2010 Magic Kaito series and the 2014 Magic Kaito 1412 portray the same sequence of events. In both, Kaito asks Jii, “Dad was murdered?! Was my dad... a thief? Was he Kid the Phantom Thief?” Kaito then says, “I see...” End image descriptions.]

While the dialogue is essentially unchanged, the old show’s use of close-ups expresses the tension of the scene spectacularly. You can see the terror in Kaito’s eyes. You can see how the thought of his father being a thief is so distressing that merely asking the question is painful and heartwrenching. You can see the sweat on Kaito’s face. You can see in great detail how much he struggles to grapple with this new truth.

Magic Kaito 1412 is significantly more distanced. And there’s power in that decision, too. The revelation is overwhelming. It’s hard to take. Kaito may want to get away from it, but he can’t.

However, I resonate more with how the original series handles the moment. Seeing how everything affects Kaito way up close speaks much more to me—and there are still some fantastic long shots, too:

[Image descriptions: Two screenshots from the original Magic Kaito series. Both are distanced long shots. In the first image, Kaito and Jii kneel on the ground. Kaito’s hands are on Jii’s shoulders. In the second image, Kaito stands, facing away from Jii, while Jii remains on the ground in shame. They wear identical outfits in both images, and their capes blow in the wind. End image descriptions.]

Gotta love those capes.

Overall, my feelings on Magic Kaito as a whole could probably be best described as somewhat mixed. And I’m kind of new here, and I don’t even know when it’s appropriate to use the #dcmk tag, so I of course don’t have the slightest clue about how popular or unpopular my opinion that the 2010 Magic Kaito series ranks above 2014′s Magic Kaito 1412 is. 

But skipping down memory lane and revisiting the old show was pleasantly surprising. Maybe my affection for Magic Kaito will never reach the highs it once had all those years ago, but it was almost comforting to find that my tastes haven’t changed all that much—rather, it’s Magic Kaito itself that’s changed.

#magic kaito #magic kaito 1412 #kaito kuroba #aoko nakamori #jii konosuke #dcmk #? lol like i said i don't know when it's appropriate to use that tag but i do talk about dc a bit here so? #mk critical #is that a tag? #honestly i was gonna try to avoid putting this in the tags because it's kind of critical but #it became like a legit essay and i'd like to hear other thoughts! and i hope it's not *that* negative? #anyway what is with me writing things i don't really plan on writing and not the things i do plan on writing ^^; #ramblings

[lycorogue]

Hey girl! For your "Ask about WIPs" game, I'm interested in "I Don't Care" and/or "Seduce with Caution." Hope you're well, stay safe!!

Hey right back! I am doing well. Hope the same for you and yours.

[WIP tag game: my list]

Ya know what, no one else has played yet, so I'll go ahead and indulge. 😀

I Don't Care

This story actually started life as a "tumblr exclusive" one-shot called Stranger in a White Dress (published here May 2018). It was actually one of the first fanfics I posted to Tumblr. It was inspired by the song "Play Me Like a Violin" by Stephen (*warning: the music video has flashing bits, so those with photosensitivity, please be careful if you watch instead of just listen).

I don't know why specifically I latched onto Gabriel Agreste and Emilie Graham de Vanily, but it seemed appropriate somehow. The story was them having a meet cute in college. Emilie would have blown into Gabriel's life for a few minutes, stole a kiss unexpectedly, and then blew back out of his life just as abruptly.

The story stayed like that for quite some time. Then, August 2019, I heard the acoustic version of Ed Sheeran's song "I Don't Care". At first blush, the song sounded like something my husband would sing, but the more I listened the more I realized it could be Gabriel singing about/to Emilie. This song was kind of the theme of the Agrestes' relationship, in my opinion. Hence stealing the song title for the story's title. I took the first verse about being at a party, and continued my story. Gabriel was dragged to a party by his flatmate, and Emilie coincidentally was there. The two reconnected, and Gabriel turned a one-time chance encounter at a club into a potential relationship.

I'm not entirely sure where else to go with this story, aside from knowing I want it to be the love story between these two. Possibly ending with Adrien's birth. Possibly continuing until Emilie's "disappearance." Not sure which yet. However, this whole story is a bit of a slow process while I wait for inspiration to strike again, mostly by way of new music. I have been a touch obsessed for the past year with the songs "2AM" by MK (feat Carla Monroe) and "Say You Won't Let Go" by James Arthur as a back and forth between Emilie and Gabriel respectively (the fact that "2AM" has a female vocalist and "Say You Won't Let Go" has a male vocalist just makes it all the better). The only snafu there is that this would be a chapter about them drinking too much while out, and/or Emilie drunk calling Gabriel and asking for him to spend the night with her. As spontaneous as I like making Emilie, it seems a bit abrupt considering where their relationship stands at the end of the 2nd chapter. So I want to come up with a buffer one showing their first official date as my 3rd chapter. I'm just not sure what said date should look like yet. Thus this WIP sits in waiting.

If you want to read the first two chapters, you can find them over on AO3, FFN, or DA.

Seduce with Caution

This one is actually my current WIP. It's also my first foray into Miraculous Ladybug smut (aged-up, of course).

For some reason, August brings out the smut in me (is it the warm weather?), and I've written other smutty fics during that month in the past. Most have never seen the light of day. I've written a couple using the X-Men OCs created for my husband's play-by-post role-play game. I've written one using my D&D character and one of her partymates. The only smut I've officially published though was my interpretation of a handwaved sex scene in the book Bitterblue by Kristin Cashore (mostly because the series was fairly unknown and that book had been published 7 years prior, so I figured not many would even find my smut).

I have never tried ML smut before though, despite enjoying a lot of the ones I've found. I just couldn't get past the mental image of the Love Square as 14-year-olds.

Last year, however, while reading Dressed to Confess by @zenmisery , she had a bit where Chat Noir's costume acted as a bit of a magical chastity belt. For some reason, that gave me this fantastic concept for a MariChat sex scene. I started working on it, but I realized that it seemed too abrupt of an interaction between these two characters without also having the story be post-reveal and the two of them being in a relationship. The concept, though, would have been how MariChat could spend a night together without Marinette finding out who Chat Noir is under the mask first. The whole premise crumbles if they're already in a relationship and/or it's post-reveal.

I just couldn't get the balance right, and so I abandoned the story. Right around December, I tried again by backtracking a touch to include the seduction and foreplay leading into the sex scene. That too seemed a bit left-field. It felt like glorious crack, and I was tempted to just run with it because crack is a fantastic story "genre" but I... just can't find it within myself to do so. So the story was abandoned again.

This past August I revisited the story once more. After 3 or 4 false starts, I tried backing up even further with my story's starting point. Now this story has become a slow-burn, sexual tension, blushfest. There's implied masturbation, and later chapters will include make-out sessions with heavy petting, but the actual true-blue smut won't show up until the final chapter or so. So my "Porn without Plot" has become "so much pining with a sprinkle of smut thrown in for flavor". 😅

I still don't have a concrete story figured out, but the working summary is: "While 19yo Chat Noir tries to demonstrate to Marinette his new 'moves' to try to win Ladybug over, he accidentally seduces Marinette. Now she has to come to terms with the knowledge that she finds him sexy and highly desirable, all while still holding a flame for Adrien. Meanwhile, Adrien has to wrestle with the knowledge that he found Marinette getting hot and bothered over him a major turn-on. Chaos ensues."

Considering it kept me over a year to write just the first chapter (but only 3 days to write the second one), I want this story complete before unleashing it onto the world. I also need to build up the confidence to let the rest of the fandom read my first ever MariChat smut soooooooooooooooooo..........

ANYWAY, yup. That's what's up with I Don't Care and Seduce with Caution.

A romance story between young Gabriel and Emilie where I humanize Gabriel....

And a slow-burn MariChat smut story that will only really include anything explicit in the last chapter or so.

Thanks so much for the ask! This was fun. Feel free to ask me more!

I've also talked about my original WIP Glitches here, here, and here, as well as talk about my other Gabriel-humanizing project When Love Matters here.

#writing #LycoRogue writing #rikareena ask #LycoRogue answers #WIP tag game #talking about my WIPs #Miraculous Ladybug #ML #ML fanfics #fanfics #I Don't Care #Seduce with Caution #please ask me things #long post

[stewblog]

The Top 10 Movies of 2021

For all the fretting about the sustainability of The Theatrical Experience expressed throughout 2021 (and to be certain, the future of it all is still no sure thing), this year was a surprisingly fantastic year for movies. Granted, some of the year’s best either barely played in theaters or straight up never came to one near you. But all the same, there were so many good movies that it was hard to whittle this list down to just 10. As always, please note that I consider these my favorite movies, a line of demarcation that may not necessarily intersect with what could be considered “the best” (itself an almost wholly arbitrary designation). So without further ado, my Top 10 Favorite Movies of 2021

10.) Evangelion: 3.0+1.0 Thrice Upon A Time - The fourth and final entry in Hideaki Anno’s Rebuild of Evangelion series, the gorgeously animated Thrice Upon A Time is both a thrilling, emotionally engaging sci-fi action film and a fulfilling endcap to the fascinating experiment of a director re-examining his own seminal work, reflecting his own evolution and maturation across the decades. Thrice is a barn-burner of a movie that will be inscrutable to anyone not already intimately familiar with Evangelion, but for me there was little else like it this year (or any year).

9.) The Matrix Resurrections - I’m not sure what I expected out of a fourth Matrix movie but it wasn’t this. It’s a bold, brash, defiant, intensely personal film that turns every expectation sideways before defiantly going its own way. I have issues with various aspects, but as a whole I absolutely adored Lana Wachowski’s return to these characters and concepts she so clearly loves. Full review here.

8.) Spider-Man: No Way Home - There are about a hundred different ways this movie could have been a disaster. At best I largely expected it to be a fun but jumbled and overstuffed bit of fan pandering, what with its roping in of villains from Spider-Man movies past. And yet director Jon Watts threaded this needle with a level of skill and precision that kind of knocked my socks off. This is one of the absolute best Spider-Man movies yet, delivering not just fun thrills, but a story that feels as true to the comic book version of Peter Parker/Spider-Man as we’ve yet seen.

7.) Luca - One of Pixar’s best movies is also one of its most low-key. This tale of sea monsters hiding in plain sight has plenty of humor and gorgeous animation, but as much heart as any of the studio’s top tier films. This movie is going to age tremendously well and I look forward to revisiting it regularly in years to come. Full review here.

6.) Pig - “Nicholas Cage is a disheveled, disgraced former three-star chef who has to find his beloved pet pig” sounds like the logline for a ridiculous Saturday Night Live sketch. It shouldn’t work, much less as a straight-faced drama. Pig is a movie that is somehow simultaneously gentle and calm, and yet filled with anger and grief and passion and empathy and sadness. It’s one of the best performances you’ll see from Nicolas Cage as he further proves why he’s one of the best out there.

5.) The Last Duel - This movie may be one of the year’s biggest bombs, but that should in no way detract or distract from the fact that it’s a captivating piece of cinema and further proof that at age 84 Sir Ridley Scott can still direct circles around someone half his age. It’s a harsh film, to be certain, but one no less relevant to modern society and culture.

4.) Dune - I’m still in shock at how much I loved Dune and how genuinely great it is almost despite my utter apathy toward the source material. If you didn’t get the chance to see this on as large a screen as possible, pray for an IMAX re-release because Dune truly delivers one of the most arresting movie experiences of the year. Full review here.

3.) tick, tick … BOOM! - In no way did I expect “the guy who made Hamilton directed a biopic about the guy who made Rent” to result in one of my favorite movies of the year, but tick, tick … BOOM! is outstanding so here we are. Lin Manuel Miranda’s feature film directing debut is kinetic, emotional, heartfelt and celebratory. Andrew Garfield gives one of my favorite performances this year and I was shocked to discover how well he can sing. 30/90 is the earworm of the year.

2.) West Side Story - On its face, a remake of West Side Story feels kind of pointless, but this is just further proof that you should never lose faith in a master like Steven Spielberg. His remarkable career has already gifted us so many genuine classics and I have no hesitation saying this belongs right alongside all of them. Full review here.

1.) In & Of Itself - This one is a bit of a cheat as it’s not technically a movie, but I don’t care. This is my list, deal with it. Simply put, this was the best thing I watched all year, hands down.

It’s hard to know what to say about this, both in terms of preserving the mystery and mystique of it for those who haven’t watched it but also just in terms of precisely what it is. I could list all of the elements found within it. I could tell you that Frank Oz (yes, the master Muppeteer) directed this filmed version of a one-man stage show that ran for more than 500 performances in NYC. I could tell you details and describe portions of it that made my jaw drop and my eyes well up with tears, often at the same time. But being taken along this unexpected journey is part of what made it so very powerful to experience on first viewing. So my advice, if you’ve read this far, is to stop reading, carve out about 90 minutes of uninterrupted time and go watch this in full (on Hulu where it’s streaming) as soon as possible. Go into it knowing as little as possible. Then come back and read the rest of this. (Or keep going. The choice is yours, really.)

Suffice to say that I have never before and will likely never again watch something quite like what Derek DelGaudio has created. It was emotional in ways I wasn’t sure would or could translate through simply watching a performance like this outside of a live, in-person setting. DelGaudio is an impeccable performer, but he never allows his showmanship or the spectacle of the moment to ever outweigh or overshadow the emotional throughline that permeates every minute of the show.

As someone who has struggled to truly understand every facet of who I am and what I do and what I am able to give to the world and those around me, In & Of Itself connected with the core of that struggle in a way few other pieces of art have in the last several years. It’s not that I received some brilliant flash of internal illumination. Frankly I have no expectation of that ever happening. Rather, the core of In & Of Itself is one of empathy, grace, perseverance and reflection.

If nothing else, In & Of Itself is both timely and evergreen because it is a reminder that everyone, all of us, indeed contains multitudes. That inherent complexity is what makes us impossible creatures, for better and worse.

Runners up:

Malignant, Val, Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings, No Time To Die, The Mitchells vs. The Machines, Judas and the Black Messiah, Ruroni Kenshin: The Final, The Harder They Fall, Last Night In Soho, The Paper Tigers, The French Dispatch.

#matrix #derek delgaudio #west side story #dune #evangelion #spider-man #marvel #keanu reeves #luca #pig #nicolas cage #the last duel #tick tick boom #lin manuel miranda #andrew garfield

[crystaljins]

River lead me home | PREVIEW

Characters: Seokjin x Reader

Word count: ?

Synopsis:  Ever since coming to the human realm when you were child, nothing seems to fit, and this was just supposed to be a simple roadtrip to help you find yourself.

Is that too much to ask for?

Spin-off to A long journey home

Rating: Teens

Notes: Ok, so at the end of last year, I first watched the movie Abominable, and I got major ALJH vibes. I only planned to write a quick little one-shot about a fun adventure revisiting that universe, and here we are, so many months later, with a huge 8 part fic that spans around 70k words. Big yikes! Anyways, I’ll be dropping the fic soon, but I wanted to a bit of a preview to build a bit of hype because I haven’t posted a full-length fic in over a year now!!! So without any further ado...

POSTING DATE: 27th Sep 2020. Updates weekly

You’ve never really been particularly fearful of getting in trouble with your mother. She has always been a sweet and timid lady, the kind who would let her daughter get away with murder. And you are an adult, even if you don’t act like it, and so it’s not like your mother can do anything other than express her disappointment with your actions. 

Kim Seokjin, on the other hand, can have you quaking in your shoes with just a look. He was your nextdoor neighbour growing up, even before you all fled your home realm. He has since moved out of his parents’ home into his own apartment to pursue his dream as a doctor (and to take home as many lady friends as he likes without his parents’ knowledge), but he is still very much a stern presence in your life, even as one of your closest friends. He likely feels responsible for you, since though the two of you were young when you were driven into the human world, he is three years older. He did once refer to you as something like an untrained puppy, which you guess is very reflective of how he views you. The result of such feelings of responsibility is him trying his best to fulfill all the duties of being your legal guardian despite having no obligation to do so. The effect is him being terrifyingly stern with you, despite him being a calm, good-humoured guy with everyone else he meets.

Which is why, when you wake up in a hospital bed with your leg wrapped in a cast, you know that today is the day Kim Seokjin kills you. If the job interview that you completely messed up isn’t enough motive for him to seek you out, then the fact that you tried to stop a purse snatcher and ended up breaking your leg in the ensuing scuffle after said thief’s motorcycle fell on you most certainly is. 

In your defence, it wasn’t like you could just leave them be! Yes, you had not been back to your home realm once in the thirteen years since you and every other guardian were driven out, but at your core, you like to think you are still a Guardian. And so, as is custom, you cannot turn down a plea for help. And the young woman screaming in distress as a man on a motorcycle drove past and snatched her purse straight off her shoulder had certainly sounded like a plea for help! Really, Jin should be impressed, because the ensuing chase was something straight out of a movie, what with you in hot pursuit on your own bike (the one both your mother and Jin do not know you own). And you totally would have gotten the purse back if it wasn’t for the slight motorcycle crash. You’re not exactly sure what you hit since the events are a little blurry, but whatever it was, it ended up knocking you out and breaking your leg. 

A slight commotion breaks out at the entrance to the room and by the way onlookers swoon, you know that your time on earth is up. For the only person that can stir such a reaction upon entering a room is Kim Seokjin himself. Guardians naturally fit most of the qualifiers of what humans consider attractive, but even by Guardian standards, Jin is ridiculously handsome. Even though you find him boring and the biggest nag to walk the planet, not even you are immune to his disarming good looks. You could probably sense his aura blindfolded and your eyes are always drawn to him in a crowd and so you easily pinpoint him amongst the crowd of onlookers before he spots you. Today is his day off and so he does not wear his usual doctor’s gown. Instead a well fitted button up shirt and trousers highlights the broadness of his shoulders and the elegance of his figure as he strolls through the room as if he owns it. You recognise the style- that particular combination of button up and trousers are his date clothes. Your heart plummets when you recognise the outfit. Jin will be extra irritated about having to check on you in the hospital on his day off. Why did the paramedics have to take you here of all places? You’ve really signed your life away this time.

He pauses to smile at a nurse who passes by and she is immediately dazzled. Though he is no doubt furious with you, and is frequently irritated by your shenanigans, to the rest of the world he is charming and funny and good-tempered. You watch the exchange with curiosity- the nurse laughs at something Jin says and there’s a faint flush to her cheeks. You will probably never have such an exchange with Jin- even if he relaxed enough to make a joke in your presence, it would probably be at your expense. Jin’s taste in women is very obvious- he likes women that match him in beauty, ones that are fantastic at making you feel like a potato in comparison despite your guardian heritage, however unintentionally. Something in you twinges at the thought- you wouldn’t mind having a normal relationship with Jin. One where he smiles at you and makes jokes and actually enjoys your presence. But he’ll probably never view you like that- he’s made it very clear throughout your friendship what you are to him.

The nurse points in your direction and takes Jin’s distraction as an opportunity to trail her gaze appreciatively over his figure, settling on his profile. She must be new to the hospital if this is the first time that she is experiencing what Jin’s coworkers at the hospital describe as the “Jin effect”. Any humans (and most guardians for that matter) who meet him instantly succumb to his charisma and absurdly handsome face and find themselves desperately in love. This nurse is no exception and you decide to utilise the momentary distraction she has provided Jin when she attempts to get his number by attempting to slide off your bed and scurry away.

A tug at the back of your collar has you stiffening. If this were a movie, there would be an uneasy swell of high-tension violin as you turn your head to find Jin has grabbed the back of your shirt to stop your slow escape. He must have utilised a spot of enhanced guardian speed to be able to cross the room so quickly. The violins in your head begin to screech in terror. Jin merely smiles and it is eerily charming. His cheeks puff out and his lips curl in a way that would dazzle the average onlooker but you see the lethal intent in his eyes. You barely manage to hold back a fearful shudder.

“Nurse Jo!” He calls, and his tone is playful and sweet which contrasts directly with the venom in his dark pupils. In their depths you can foresee your death. “It seems one of our patients is trying to escape.”

#bts fluff #jin x reader #kim seokjin x reader #jin fluff #castlebangtan #preview

[mysticalrunawayprincess]

Everything He Ever Wanted

Hi Guys! This is a new Jay Park fanfic I’m working on (because we are in a serious shortage and us girls need our fantasy fix!) Its about Jay falling in love and wanting to settle down, and all the headache and heartache that ensues (cue lots of angst, sexy times and love :P). I post the stories on Wattpad as I’m not sure if I’d be able to post the full story on here (Tumblr guidelines and stuff) but I am going to be posting the first chapter here and then every time I publish a new chapter I’ll post the links for you to read. The story is for 18ANDOVER! If you are not 18 this story isn’t for you (sorry). And Jay if you are reading this: its pure fantastical fiction! I don’t mean to embarrass or cast aspersions on you in any kind of way. If you are reading this (PLEASE dont lol), I hope I did your fantasy character justice :P. For the rest of you, happy reading!

Oh BTW: New Chapters every Friday, but you get this one a day early just because I love y’all!!! xxxxxxxxxx

1. Home Is Where The Heart was

An exhausted sigh left Jay's lips in a rush, as he entered through the  open door and dropped his bags on the heated marble flooring.

Having been away on tour for 6 weeks Jay had a lot of bags to carry; all heavy, all full of laundry.

He paused and took a breath in, savouring the smell of home, the smell of Her.

She  hadn't been home in a long time. This was no longer to be Her home;  hell it hadn't even been Her "home" for longer than a few weeks, most of  which she had spent elsewhere (or rather somewhere else). But since She  had been the last person in the house before Jay had left for the tour,  Her scent still lingered. And it was this scent that invaded Jay's  senses, coiling around his synapses and holding them at ransom as his  mind cast back to the last moment he saw Her.

Jay stood watching   Her leave through the polished glass doors of his office building, Her   words still ringing in his ears like a death knell, "We can't do this   any more Jay, I have to go back and live my life..." She took a pause   here, her perfectly soft and plump lips quivering momentarily, almost as  if to hold Her back from completing the sentence,"... and you have to live yours."

Now the thing is, when Jay first saw Her walk  through the doors; Her soft hair in which he loved to bury his face now  framing Her face in a twist-out that beautifully rippled in the light  breeze of the evening night air as She stepped through the glass door,  his heart had soared and swooped the same way it did every day since the  very first day he had seen Her.

His face broke into an  unstoppable smile as he outstretched his arms to embrace Her,   automatically breathing in Her scent as She stepped into his embrace,   clinging to him as though She would be otherwise flung into the furthest  reaches of space.

Jay hadn't noticed the shine of unshed tears  demanding to be released. He hadn't noticed the taxi outside, and he  certainly didn't know that it was taking Her to the airport.

He was oh-so blissfully unaware of  all of these little details.

She had been going back and forth with this for weeks, months even, ever  since  their relationship had first begun showing signs of becoming  more serious (unbeknownst to Jay). And try as She might, She knew this  couldn't work; there were too many moving parts, too many things to  consider and too many sacrifices to be made. She thought it best that  She end this now before it got too serious and whilst they were still  able to at least salvage some sort of friendship from the wreckage.

Noticing She was lost in thought, Jay nudged Her, asking if She were OK.

Now  on the way over here, She had already told herself  that She wasn't  going to cry and do the whole melodramatic stuff; that She was going to  keep it light and factual and hoped he would understand.

And so  when She quickly lifted Her head to meet his eye, Her face had already  settled into a bright and easy smile, belying the ton of bricks that She  was about to drop onto the smitten and unsuspecting Jay Park.

Now,  as he watched Her leave after begging Her to reconsider ("... you don't  have to do this..."). His heart beat harder with every step She took   to the waiting cab outside. He was frozen helpless, unable to stop this  series of Very Unfortunate and Fucked Up Events.

He watched the taxi drive away, taking with it the only piece of true happiness that he had ever felt in a long, long time.

And he had let it happen.

BZZZZZZZBZZZZZZZZBZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

The  vibration of Jay's phone broke him out of his reverie with a snap. He  thrust his hand into his pocket and pulled it out, glancing at the  screen as he made his way to the kitchen.

BZZZZZZZBZZZZZZZZBZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

He paused with his hand on the handle of the refrigerator, his thumb hovering indecisively over the phone screen.

BZZZZZZZBZZZZZZZZBZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

He  rolled his eyes and pressed the green button, putting the phone to his  ear at the same time as he pulled open the refrigerator door.

"Heeeeeyyyyyy  bro, whatcha doin'?" the gravelly voice of Jay's business partner Mike  came through the phone as vivid as if he were standing in the room,  rather than 5,000 miles away.

"Hey, Mike" Jay chuckled. "Not much, just got back."

"How was the tour?"

"Yeah it was good. The guys killed as usual," said Jay, into an empty fridge.

"Did you get any numbers?" Jay could practically hear the Cheshire Cat smile on Mike's face as he asked this question.

He  sighed as he closed the refrigerator door and made his way to the  living room. "No I didn't get any numbers Mike" Jay said, plopping down  dejectedly onto his plush sofa, allowing his head to fall back, eyes  staring straight at the ceiling.

"Jay, you are really wasting your unlimited pussy allowance, man!"  groaned Mike. Jay chuckled in response, closing his eyes and wearily  raising a hand to rub them. "Dude you should be literally DROWNING in  pussy!"

"I'm too busy for all that extra shit, Mike." Jay sighed.

"Extra  shit? Dude." Mike was all seriousness now, leaving a pause so pregnant  that it caused Jay to sit up and open his eyes. "You are never, too  tired, for pussy!" Jay fell back into his original position, another  exhausted sigh leaving his lips as he landed except this time, he had a  little smile on his face.

Mike's dry humour was a welcome salve right now anyway.

"Plus, Jay; I'm married."

"I know Mike."

"So that means I'm living vicariously through you, my dude!"

"Mike-"

"Look,  forget about all that anyway" Mike interrupted Jay, sensing he was not  perhaps his usual playful self and wondering if he had perhaps struck a  nerve.

Mike was quite intuitive, even if he sometimes came off as  oblivious. In his world, he found that feigning ignorance can sometimes  be a better strategy around people, especially when dealing with the  types of sensitive and high-flying businessmen he was used to dealing  with on a daily basis.

Or when his friend had something - or  someone - on his mind that may need to be discussed away over copious  amounts of alcohol sometime in the near-future.

"Remember you  have the interview with Vogue Korea about the new AOMG site and app,"  said Mike making a mental note to revisit this again at a later time.

"Yeah" sighed Jay gratefully, thankful for the change in subject. "When is it again?"

"Friday. 9.30AM"

Jay pulled his phone away from his ear and checked the screen. The interview would be in three days time.

"Cool, my assistant already has the details anyway. I'll check my emails to see when the car will be arriving."

"Sweet. Hit me up later, so we can talk a bit about the Nike deal. But until then; GET SOME SLEEP."

Click

Mike ended the call.

Jay  allowed the phone to slide from his ear onto the sofa next to him,  bringing both hands up to gently rub his face before dropping his head  back and allowing his arms to drop onto the sofa back. The huge floor to  ceiling windows directly opposite bathed him in the light of the  setting sun, as he allowed his exhausted and aching body to sink deeper  into his seat.

As his mind drifted, he remembered a particular  evening spent on this same sofa during a thunderstorm not too long after  he had first met Her. In fact, there were many evenings he remembered  being spent on this sofa (not all of them as innocent as the particular  evening he currently had in mind however, but all of them just as  enjoyable).

Sharing one of those huge soft furry blankets that  She loved so much, with a low fire burning in the marble wood-burning  fireplace to the right of them.

She had been drinking Jack  Daniel's, and he had been drinking soju, both just talking to and laughing with each other in an atmosphere of comfortability, while   outside torrential rain pounded against the monolithic windows and   brilliant forks of lightening spilt the charcoal grey and roiling sky,   causing occasional rolls of thunder which reverberated throughout the   building.

The dichotomy of the chaos on one side of the window pane, versus the serenity on the other hadn't been lost on either of them.

Every  now again She would interrupt the freely-flowing conversation to point  out a particularly spectacular lightning strike or a close roll of  thunder would make Jay jump, which he would then try to disguise by  acting as though he was just moving positions on the couch or picking  up/putting down his glass (which She very politely acted like She did  not notice, or turned away to hide Her smile - which he had gratefully   appreciated).

Her being in Jay's house had been perfectly  innocent at the time, having being introduced through his artist Jarv  Dee, Jay had innately felt at ease around Her. She had an easy-going and  relaxed nature, with a quick wit and genuine smile. He became further  intrigued when he found out that She was a full-stack developer and  promptly discussed possibly working together on something some time.  Which is how the new AMOG website and H1gher app came about.8

That was exactly one year ago from today and 5 months from the day She ripped out Jay's heart and stomped all over it.

"We can't do this Jay..."

Her words echoed around his head like a death knell.

Jay  had spent every waking moment carefully analysing every detail of their  interactions - every facial expression, every vocal inflection - in the  hopes of being able to at least understand WHY She had done this.

Did he say something - do something - to scare her off?

How, when things were going so good between them, could she just end everything and leave so suddenly?

Jay  was aware that he was getting older but, he hadn't really ever thought  of what the future would look like for him and who he would want to  settle down with. The kind of jet-setting lifestyle Jay led meant he had  the luxury of being able to avoid thinking about such things under the  guise of being "too busy".  And with the fast life Jay led, the women he  came across had been just as fast.

That is until he had met Her.

Meeting Her had made him truly question his life dynamic, made him want to change his dynamic.

Made  him think about when would be the time to put down the mic for good and  step back to make way for the younger artists coming up behind him?

Jay  had almost single-handedly built an entire musical empire in a foreign  land, which meant he really had to think about who it was he wanted to  share that with.

A thought he had never needed to have before Her.

She  had awakened something in him that he had been confident was dormant,  something which he had convinced his concerned parents and nagging  brother he wasn't quite ready for.

She made him think more of the life after. After all the parties, interviews, world travelling, and screaming fans.

Of the life he lived when he was just Jay, the dorky kid from Seattle.

Who did he want to come home to? Who did he want waiting for him when the lights had faded and the music stopped?

The  morning after the lightening storm had been the first time Jay had  woken up to Her. They had fallen asleep where they sat in Jay's plush  sofa, having spent the evening bonding over their respective careers,  old 90s RnB and alcohol. Seeing her head resting upon the opposite  armrest of his sofa, the golden rays of the early morning sun  illuminating the golden undertones of Her skin, made something inside  him sing. He knew he liked having Her around, liked hearing Her voice,  liked knowing she was OK.

He loved being in her presence, hearing Her laugh, seeing Her focused frown whilst She was working.

He loved smelling Her, breathing Her in whenever he could.

He loved hearing Her footsteps on his hardwood floor.

He hated not knowing why it went wrong.

But  in just a few days the H1gher app and new AOMG website was due to go  live, meaning She would be coming back to Korea for the launch.

Meaning She and Jay would be in each other's company for the first time since Her departure.

Meaning Jay would not only have to face Her, but once She left he'd have to relive the pain of her leaving all over again.

Jay groaned inwardly.

This should be fun, he thought humourlessly.

Jay reached for his phone beside him and dialled an all too familiar number.

"Hello?" Came the answer down the line.

"Hey, is she free?"

"Good evening, Mr Park. Yes she is free. Regular timing?"

Jay let out a barely audible sigh, his 1000th in the 45 minutes he'd been home. He wouldn't need too long. "Yeah."

"She will arrive in 30 minutes."

Jay ended the call.

He  stood and made his way to his drinks cabinet, pouring himself some  Hennessey before walking over to the window to take a sip, surveying the  evening sky and awaiting his visitor.

The objective of the visit was purely for the purposes of release.

And as Jay's buzzer rang twenty-five minutes later, he knew that's all anyone who wasn't Her could offer him.

#jay park #jaypark #aomg #fanfic #angst #emotional #rapper queen #romance #relationship #series daddyvibes

[aion-rsa]

Marvel’s What If…? Episode 1 Review: Peggy Carter Changes MCU History

https://ift.tt/eA8V8J

This review contains spoilers for What If…? episode 1.

What If…? is the latest Marvel Studios small screen project to arrive on Disney+ after much fanfare. The animated anthology show, created by Trollhunters: Tales of Arcadia writer A.C. Bradley and Marvel storyboard vet Bryan Andrews, aims to explore alternate timelines in the MCU multiverse. In order to fully grasp the basic premise of What If…? as a whole it helps to have watched Marvel’s Loki, which recently introduced the multiverse to the MCU.

What If…? episode 1, “What If… Captain Carter Were The First Avenger?,” focuses on a (mainly) WWII-era version of Peggy Carter who made a key alternate choice that affected the creation of Captain America in a major way.

It’s a fun episode! Your mileage may vary depending on how much you love Peggy Carter, but since I love her a whole lot I had a good time watching this. The main downside, I suspect, to any of these installments, is that they’re inherently redundant. As far as we know, none of the fantastical concepts here will bleed into the live-action MCU. But if you’re here for a good time and not a long time, What If…? should make for a neat weekly diversion.

Our What If…? reviews are going to adopt a different format. More of a “breakdown” that we hope will still satisfy regular readers but also help younger viewers and those less familiar with the MCU keep up.

With that in mind, let’s take a look at “What If… Captain Carter Were The First Avenger?”

Required viewing

In terms of understanding the central characters and how things changed inside the branch timeline featured in this first episode, we would recommend revisiting Captain America: The First Avenger, Marvel One-Shot: Agent Carter, and the opening act of The Avengers. If you’re on a full Peggy Carter binge, why not add both seasons of ABC’s live-action Agent Carter series to your watchlist, too?

What’s different?

This episode explored what would have happened if Steve Rogers was unable to take the super soldier serum during World War II and Peggy Carter volunteered to become Dr. Abraham Erskine’s lab rat instead.

Peggy’s “what if…?” was deciding to stand her ground and stay in the room while the serum was administered during the iconic transformation sequence featured in Captain America: The First Avenger. She then had a chance to intervene in the Hydra bombing, but Steve got caught up in the action and was subsequently shot.

With time running out to perform the super soldier process, Peggy jumped into the machine and went on to become Captain Carter, having all the physical powers of Captain America along with a different costume and an altered shield with a Union Jack at its center.

Steve was badly injured and had to undergo intense physiotherapy while Peggy trained to be the best she could be. Their relationship blossomed and, thanks to Howard Stark, Steve took on the role of her sidekick in a Tesseract-powered Hydra Stomper – basically an early version of the Iron Man suit. Meanwhile, Peggy faced interference from Colonel John Flynn, who was regularly on hand to pour out a stream of misogyny regarding her place in the fight.

In a familiar First Avenger train sequence, Peggy went on an altered mission with Steve, Bucky Barnes and the Howling Commandos to take out the Red Skull, however it was Steve who ended up falling from the train in this timeline and not Bucky, so it stands to reason that Bucky wouldn’t then go on to become the Winter Soldier.

Other more minor changes include Peggy probably not making out with her own niece during any Civil War shenanigans in the future – and please do not direct me to any fan art depicting that scenario in the comments, I beg you.

In the end, the Red Skull used the Tesseract to summon a tentacled “champion of Hydra” and Peggy had to sacrifice herself to push it back back into the space portal from whence it came. She emerged from the portal pre-The Avengers’ Battle of New York.

Who are the voices?

Jeffrey Wright plays the show’s narrator, Uatu The Watcher, and he’ll be here for every episode.

Returning to voice their characters from Captain America: The First Avenger were Hayley Atwell as Peggy Carter, Sebastian Stan as Bucky Barnes, Dominic Cooper as Howard Stark, Neal McDonough as Dum Dum Dugan, Toby Jones as Arnim Zola, Samuel L. Jackson as Nick Fury, and Stanley Tucci as Dr. Abraham Erskine. Other MCU actors joining in were Jeremy Renner as Hawkeye and Ross Marquand as the Red Skull, reprising his role from Avengers: Infinity War/Endgame.

Bradley Whitford may seem like a new addition as the arrogant Colonel John Flynn, but he previously portrayed the character in the live-action Marvel One-Shot: Agent Carter released back in 2013, so even in the Sacred Timeline Flynn continued to be a thorn in Peggy’s side for quite a while.

The elephant in the room here is Steve Rogers. Chris Evans did not add his voice to the What If…? mix, so it was up to Marvel animation alum Josh Keaton to stand in for Evans, and he honestly did a really good job of it all things considered.

Standout moments

I gotta say it was truly wild for me to witness Captain Carter have adventures onscreen at all! It was obviously great to see Peggy kicking ass with her enhanced strength – the serum only beefed up her already brave and competent nature – but this version of the character has something of a unique origin, having been concocted as a kind of throwaway addition to the match-3 game Marvel Puzzle Quest in 2016. A couple of years later, Saladin Ahmed added her to the pages of Marvel Comics in Exiles #3, and it clearly didn’t take Marvel Studios long to figure out how to apply the enthusiastic Captain Carter fan response to an MCU project.

Peggy riding Steve’s Iron Man-esque Hydra Stomper into a dogfight during the WWII montage sequence was a delight, frankly. The animation in most of the fighting sequences was terrific and really took golden opportunities to reach for the kind of punching, kicking, shield-throwing ballet that the live-action format could never quite achieve with its restrictions of reality.

I found myself slowly warming to What If…?’s animation style, which I probably still wouldn’t describe as my favorite if I’m honest. I love the What If? comics, and this series felt like an opportunity to really push the weirdness envelope a little more. You only have to look at what Netflix accomplished with its anthology series Love, Death & Robots to see how differently a What If? series that embraced other styles and voices could have gone, but I grew up on Saturday morning cartoons, stop motion, Fantastic Planet, and Heavy Metal, so forgive me for briefly imagining the possibilities of this project in a wilder sense.

One of the oddest standout moments for me was when the episode subverted my expectations somewhat. After Steve was seemingly killed during the train heist, I thought the creators of the show were all set to explore him becoming the Winter Soldier, and I have to admit the idea intrigued me a little! However, it didn’t go down like that, and I was left to mentally wander down a different “what if…?” rabbit hole alone.

How does it work out?

In the future, Nick Fury used the Tesseract to transport Peggy back from wherever she ended up after she entered the portal, and it looks like she joined the Infinity Saga-era Avengers Initiative in Steve’s place. Whether it all worked out well for this episode’s specific MCU timeline remains to be seen, but it would be really fun to see if Agent Coulson had a pack of Captain Carter trading cards!

More to come

Episode 1 played like a pilot for an ongoing Captain Carter series for good reason: What If…? has been confirmed to include at least one Peggy Carter installment in every season going forwards.

“A lot of the season one episodes are riffing off certain points in the cinematic universe and maybe even delving in a certain phase, but we need to expand and explore more things, so we had to come up with other ideas that were a little further down the timeline,” director Bryan Andrews told us, later adding “Peggy Carter is pretty awesome; Captain Carter is pretty awesome, we’d love to see more of her.”

Marvel’s What If…? is now streaming weekly on Disney+ every Wednesday.

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The post Marvel’s What If…? Episode 1 Review: Peggy Carter Changes MCU History appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/3AAseau

#aion-rsa #Den of Geek

[bobdylanrevisited]

Highway 61 Revisited

Released: 30 August 1965

Rating: 10/10

My favourite album of all time. Released just five months after BIABH, this is another unforgettable record which defines the 1960s. Unlike the previous album, this one is almost entirely electric, minus the closing song, and it was clear that Bob couldn’t be further from his folk roots. This is, for me, the pinnacle of music and song writing, and whilst I consider many of his albums to be masterpieces, this is the one that truly makes him a god in my eyes. He would tour following this release, with so-called fans hatefully booing at the sight of a drum kit or an amplifier. This only confirmed to Dylan that he had to continue revolutionising his sound, and if these people didn’t like it then he must be doing something right. 

1) Like A Rolling Stone - Judas! How dare he open with one of the greatest songs ever recorded. A needling, accusatory, schadenfreude attack of ‘Miss Lonely’, which relishes in a fall from grace. There’s been much speculation as to her identity, but it’s the refrain of ‘How does it feel?’ that will get under your skin and stay with you. The angry snarling of Dylan is both exhilarating and intense and it never gets old, the song sounds fresh every single time you hear it. Alongside the perfect lyrics, the crashing guitars and Al Kooper’s irregular organ chords give the track a uniquely jarring sound, and it’s breathtaking. It’s no wonder it’s often voted the greatest song ever made, and Dylan has enjoyed playing it live ever since, in many different styles. But nothing will ever top the Free Trade Hall 1966 performance, which is the greatest moment in musical history. If you haven’t heard it, go and listen to it immediately and prepare for your jaw to hit the floor. Oh, and don’t forget, play it fucking loud. 

2) Tombstone Blues - Dylan parades historical and pop culture figures in this fast paced song, which has been analysed as being about the Vietnam War or the absurdity of the zeitgeist. Another track that has remained popular in live sets for decades, it’s a brilliantly worded piece that is both amusing and confusing. The screeching guitar solos from Mike Bloomfield are pure rock ‘n’ roll and elevate the song to another level, although the whole band are phenomenal throughout the album. It’s just another brilliant track that couldn’t be further from his earlier work, but cements Dylan as a rock star. 

3) It Takes A Lot To Laugh, It Takes A Train To Cry - Although many quick tempo versions were rehearsed, this final recording was reworked by Dylan over a lunch break, because he’s a fucking genius. To create this beautiful song in under an hour is ridiculous, and it’s a lovely, bluesy tune which is less angry and cynical than many other songs on the album. The Newport Folk Festival 1965 version, which is hard to hear over the screams of those feeling betrayed, is great, but the Rolling Thunder Revue 1975 version is truly magnificent 

4) From A Buick 6 - Whilst this is the weakest song on the album, it’s still an incredible blues track with some brilliant singing from Bob. The lyrics aren’t as deep as the other songs, it’s basically about a woman who gives Bob life and potentially will cause his death, but the instrumentation is fun and it sounds like everyone is having a blast playing it. It’s a great tune that is a fun couple of minutes and there’s nothing wrong with that. 

5) Ballad Of A Thin Man - Poor Mr. Jones, probably Dylan’s most fully formed and completely repugnant character. This is my favourite track on the album and probably my favourite Dylan song (I know I say that about a lot of songs). It’s a brutal, depressing, bleak assassination of someone who has wronged Bob, with haunting piano that echos around the menacing words that send shivers down your spine. It’s most likely aimed at the reporters and the media who misunderstood Bob, or pretend to be cool and up to date with the culture, and here Bob unmasks them and publicly annihilates their fraudulent disguises. As with much of this album, it has remained in his live sets since release, but again no performance ever topped the Free Trade Hall 1966 one, the booing made Dylan’s words and delivery even more sinister and shocking. 

6) Queen Jane Approximately - Another needling song in the same vein as ‘Like A Rolling Stone’, though this one is more sympathetic to the subject. However, it is once again a classic track which sounds absolutely beautiful. Potentially about Joan Baez, though Dylan claims it actually about a man, it’s a fantastic piece that is both mellow and devastating at the same time. 

7) Highway 61 Revisited - The whistle on this song is iconic, as is the screamed refrain which is basically impossible to not shout at the top of your lungs with each listen. Biblical lyrics and dark imagery are contrasted by the upbeat tune, and it’s interesting that in reality, Highway 61 leads back to Dylan’s birth place, potentially making himself the true subject of the song. Another example of his advances in storytelling through references and metaphor, this is a deep and vivid song that Dylan still belts out on tour to this day. 

8) Just Like Tom Thumb’s Blues - Despite being a brilliant song, which creates an atmosphere of tiredness and surrender, the story Dylan tells here is both fascinating and, not surprisingly, fantastically written. Starting in Juarez and returning to New York City, the protagonist must fight off women, booze, drugs, and the police on his journey, and it’s a riveting tale. As there is no chorus or refrain, this could easily be a Kerouac short story, but it really works as a track you can lose yourself to. You’ll be wrapped up in your own imagination of the events, described in an incredibly personal way by Bob, as if he’s telling you this story directly. I know I’ve mentioned this a lot, but the Free Trade Hall 1966 version sounds like it’s not of this world and should be mandatory listening. 

9) Desolation Row - This is the true showcase of Bob’s skill with the english language, an 11 minute acoustic song, which is more like an epic poem of old. Again peppered with pop culture references, it was released during a period where 3 minute love songs were topping the charts, and shows how much Bob was challenging the notion of what music could be about, and really mastering it as a literary art form. It begins with infamous lynchings from Bob’s birthplace, before moving on to fairy tale characters, biblical figures, authors, poets, scientist, and the victims of the Titanic, to name but a few. The lyrics are so engrossing, and the delivery is almost hypnotic, that the 11 minutes feel like mere seconds, as he paints a tapestry in your mind that is exciting, vivid, and yet tinged with a bleakness as no one is happy in the song. It’s an incredible way to end the album, though you’d wish it went on forever. 

Verdict: Obviously, I consider this the definition of perfection. For an album that largely focuses on sadness, feeling lost, anger, and cynicism, no other record makes me feel as joyous as this one. It’s the culmination of everything that came before it, from the dense verses of ‘A Hard Rain’s A-Gonna Fall’, to the audience rejection of ‘My Back Pages’, to the new sound on ‘Subterranean Homesick Blues’, and it comes together to create this perfect album. It’s unfathomable that a human created this, it seems more like a gift from the universe made especially for me, and I implore you to listen to it on repeat. Each time you’ll discover something new and your favourite song will change numerous times. Bob’s next outing would be of a similarly astonishing quality, and whilst he was touring the world to a chorus of jeers, he was about to record another album that would continue to push the boundaries of popular music. 

#bob dylan #highway 61 revisited

[flopsider]

What Makes a Paper Mario Game Great?

*This post was turned into a script for a Game Domain video which I’ll post here once it’s out!

The Paper Mario game series has undergone massive changes with its last few installments. Most fans can agree that the first 3 (or, if you’re strictly fond of the formula from Paper Mario 64 and The Thousand Year Door, the first 2) games achieved something brilliant. They cemented Mario’s role in the RPG world, providing players with unforgettable experiences that left many with powerful nostalgia and an urge to revisit the titles as they grew older. However, with the newer titles, the gaming community’s feelings on the franchise have been shaken. Once Nintendo began to develop Paper Mario as an Action-Adventure series, many fans were left feeling like the company stopped listening to its fans and were taking the series in an unwelcome new direction. For some fans, however, particularly younger players who are just now discovering the Paper Mario games through the newer titles, these new changes and formulas offer some very enjoyable experiences. Undoubtedly, nostalgia plays a huge role in how we view video games, but there is more at play here than just sentiment. The question I’d like to pose, then, is “What Makes a Paper Mario Game Great?”

Let’s take a look at the individual games and see which areas they thrive in, and what holds them back. Keep in mind that every opinion listed here is just that: an opinion. I’ve tried to be objective in my analyses here, but like all people, I have biases and nostalgia which affect my opinions of video games, so don’t take what I say as the undisputed truth. This is simply my attempt to answer the question posed as best as I can, so if you disagree, let me know peacefully and respectfully in the comments!

 Paper Mario 64

 I feel like this game is the perfect entry to the series. It has a charming art style that I feel still holds up, offers fantastic gameplay and controls and a solid battle system, and has memorable characters. The main things that hold it back are the more basic storyline and villain, and the less unique character types compared to the next 2 games. However, both of these things can be forgiven since it was the first entry to the series. The chapters are all joys to explore, the leveling system is satisfying and allows for customization, and the badges are a great way to personalize Mario based on your playstyle. Paper Mario 64 laid the groundwork for the games that would follow, and most of the aspects of its formula would evolve throughout the next two entries.

 Paper Mario: TTYD

 There’s not much I can say about this that hasn’t been said before, but in summary, this game took everything that made Paper Mario 64 great and evolved it into something phenomenal. It built upon the battle system, offering what is widely considered to be the best battling in any Paper Mario game. The audience feature made battles livelier and more exciting, offering further incentive to pursue optional enemy encounters. It gave players new attacks and new ways to orchestrate them, with less repetitive actions than in the first game. It offered a much deeper, darker story with compelling antagonists, partners and NPCs unique to this game which made the world feel alive, and side quests that allowed you to progress through the game and level up your character in a less linear way. The world was crafted beautifully, with areas that stand out in many players’ memories and are far less formulaic than the typical Mario worlds. There were tons of secrets and areas to explore, as well as the first iteration of the Pit of 100 Trials, a side quest arguably more challenging than the game’s final boss. It’s no wonder this is likely the most acclaimed Paper Mario title to date. 

 Super Paper Mario

 First and foremost, I have tons of nostalgia for SPM. It’s maybe my favorite video game of all time, or at least in the top 3. It’s the first Paper Mario game I ever played (I was 7 or 8 years old and have since replayed it many times), and when I played it I had never heard of Paper Mario. There’s a chance that if I instead played 64 and/or TTYD first, I’d be more partial to those games because of nostalgia. However, I truly believe that, nostalgia aside, SPM provides the best overall game experience. I also think that if SPM had come first, and the creators then shifted into a more straightforward RPG style over time, it would be less polarizing.

The move away from turn based combat and into the more classic Mario platforming/real time combat was bold, but not universally appreciated. I totally get why some people feel it was a bad change. If you were in love with the camera perspective, movement, and combat mechanics of the first two, this may be less fulfilling. However, if you are a huge fan of platformers, then it’s certainly a welcome new angle. And if you’re like me and you grew up enamored with classic 2-D Mario platforming action, but also fell in love with the style, RPG elements, and stories of the first two Paper Mario games, then you’ll likely find the perfect mix of the two in SPM. Plus, I feel like turn based combat was never the basis of the Paper Mario franchise, or at least was not the core concept that made the games great. Some people disagree with that, but I personally believe that all the before listed criteria make up the greatness that is the Paper Mario series, and I think Super Paper Mario lives up to them. Despite its many differences, Super Paper Mario felt like a true successor to TTYD. The graphics were quite similar aside from the camera angles, the dialogue and storytelling were stylistically similar but done even better this time around, and several elements were revisited such as the Pit of 100 Trials. I loved the turn-based combat in 64 and TTYD, but I also adored the platforming and real time combat of SPM. Overall, I just feel SPM has the most to offer and provides the most unique, thrilling, and memorable experience. The New 2-D / 3-D switch feature quite literally adds a whole new dimension to the game. I think this is super interesting and fun to use, and it allows for more interesting level and puzzle design. It offered a nice balance since much of the game is played 2-D style whereas the first two entries were set in a 3-D space. Without the 3-D option it’d still be a great game, but might end up feeling a little basic by comparison. The Pixls, in my opinion, are a fantastic reimagining of the partner system. Since the game ditched turn-based combat in favor of platforming combat, the Pixls affect your movement, attack, and defense abilities in real time and can be swapped quickly. This makes platforming, fighting, and movement in general more fun and varied. In my opinion, they’re a fresh take on partners, and even though I love the old partner system, I see this as a welcome new take on it. Flipside and Flopside serve as effective and memorable hub worlds where you can touch base after exploring other dimensions. They have tons of explorable areas, puzzles, characters, and secrets, all of which contribute to the world development. The NPC’s helped add depth and contribute to the lore, with the Flipside and Flopside bartenders being the best examples. The ability to play as 4 different characters, each with different special abilities and movement characteristics was a huge step forward and made the level design much more interesting. In several areas, you have to utilize all available characters to access certain areas, some secret and some required. The best example of this in my opinion is in Castle Bleck, where in order to effectively maneuver around the platforming challenges and access secret areas you have to take advantage of Mario’s ability to flip into 3-D, Peach’s parasol gliding, and Luigi’s super jump, while Bowser is your key to easily clearing rooms of tough enemies. Maybe the least controversial thing I could say about this game is that it has a phenomenal story, the best of any Paper Mario game to date in my opinion. It’s darker than any other Mario game I’ve played, and despite its cartoony appearance, the stakes were higher than ever. It had incredibly memorable characters, small bits of backstory at the end of each chapter which slowly reveal the connection between the antagonist and Mario’s partner Tippi, excellent dialogue and humor, and a darker plot than any Mario game I’ve played. This is balanced by the game’s colorful visuals and soundtrack which make it a joy to play. The game had an inspired world design with bold style choices. For example, in the space levels of Chapter 4, the game temporarily becomes a Defender type horizontal space shoot ‘em up. It was a perfect blend of the RPG style from the first two games and the side scrolling platforming of older Super Mario games. The music is a fantastic mix of retro and modern, a concept mirrored in the graphics and gameplay. All in all, Super Paper Mario is a perfect blend of old and new. 

Okay, clearly, I have a lot of love for this game. But I want to be as objective as possible here, so let’s look at some of its shortcomings. The XP system was more basic than the first two games. It being present was a huge plus, but when you level up, it upgrades a predetermined stat (HP or attack) as opposed to you having stat customization. Along these same lines, the lack of badges meant less customization and attack options. Level design wise, some areas felt somewhat empty in 3-D. I didn’t really feel like this as a kid, but as an adult I feel like they could’ve done more with the 3-D perspective in certain areas. In some places, they totally nailed it though. 

 That brings us to the more recent, more divisive action-adventure titles. To preface, I have the least experience with these games, and the majority of my familiarity with them is from reading articles and watching videos which analyze them and compare them to the older games. So I’ll try not to be too critical, as I’d like to play them all the way through before completely solidifying my opinion on them. That being said, you can learn a lot about a game by watching gameplay footage and reading analyses of them, so I’ll do what I can to go over their pros and cons.

 For all three of the newest titles, it’s worth noting that I didn’t include the world being made of Paper in the list of what makes these games great. I don’t hate the jokes, comments, or visual references to paper and crafts in these games. In fact, sometimes I think they’re quite clever and add to the feel of the game. However, in the first 3 “classic” Paper Mario games, it wasn’t a major point of plot or world development, but rather something casually referenced in some well-timed jokes. In fact, the first game wasn’t even meant to be a paper based world. It had many titles in development, and the one directly preceding Paper Mario was Mario Story. The name Paper Mario, more than anything, is a reference to the art style being reminiscent of a pop-up book, and is not the basis of the gameplay or world creation. At least until the more recent games, that is. Sticker Star, Color Splash, and Origami King all base many core gameplay mechanics, the visuals, much of the humor, and even some of the world development on everything being made of paper. This is a cute idea, and the graphics in the newer games are undeniably vibrant and beautiful, but it ends up holding the newer games back only because they focus more on paper gimmicks than they do the story, unique character design, and gameplay. To be fair, I haven’t played the newer games completely, and from what I’ve seen, Origami King looks like a phenomenal stand-alone game and a much stronger Paper Mario entry than SS or CS. I just think Arlo summed it up perfectly when he said, “We didn’t love Paper Mario because it was paper, we loved it because it was Mario’s story.” That being said, let’s look at each game and see what they have going for them.

 Paper Mario: Sticker Star

 This is easily the most universally criticized Paper Mario title. Every so often you’ll find someone who will defend it, but for the most part, the fans of the series see this as the point where the games took a turn for the worse. Instead of just adding to the overwhelming pile of hatred for the game, I’m going to try and discuss some specific things that hold it back while giving it credit where credit is deserved. Sticker Star is not irredeemable. It has some of the charm the series is known for, some solid dialogue and humor, and appealing visuals. Unfortunately, there’s not too much more I can give it credit for, at least in the context of the other games in the series. So much of what made the first 3 games great were lost here. One of the most obvious steps backward is the near-total lack of original characters. Instead of a world packed with new NPCs and enemies with distinct personalities, the game almost exclusively utilizes classic Super Mario characters. You’ll see plenty of toads, goombas, and koopas here, and not anything in the realm of demonic shadow queens, members of ancient tribes, or mysterious cape and monocle wearing antagonists threatening the existence of all worlds. The villain here is Bowser, which is not just disappointing because it’s formulaic, but it almost feels like it separates the franchise even further from its roots because of Super Paper Mario’s inclusion of Bowser as a protagonist. The battle system also fails to reward you for entering into enemy encounters, and feels much more basic than the previous games. Overall, my main criticism of this game is that it took several steps backwards and not enough steps forward to justify them.

 Paper Mario: Color Splash

 This game improved upon the action-adventure formula of Sticker Star in almost every way. In that way, it can be seen as a parallel to TTYD, which improved upon its predecessor’s formula. The difference is, TTYD’s predecessor established a formula that was already phenomenal, whereas the groundwork Sticker Star laid for Color Splash was far weaker. Most of the criticisms I have for Sticker Star could be echoed about this game, just less harshly. Speaking more positively, this game had gorgeous visuals (second only to The Origami King), excellent dialogue and humor, and some creative levels, such as the section where you operate the cannons aboard a sailing battleship. 

 Paper Mario: The Origami King

 Overall, The Origami King looks to be the strongest Paper Mario entry in years. It seems to have developed the action-adventure formula of its two immediate predecessors, while including a handful of RPG elements. The battle system is both new and familiar - it’s turn based, but the ring system adds a puzzle element that, to some players, makes battles much more enjoyable and to some distracts from the battling itself. Utilizing the rings, it seems like there are far more creative ways to reach your opponents, but far fewer creative ways to actually attack them. Once again, the world and characters are more formulaic, relying heavily on classic Super Mario locations and characters. However, this game offers more uniqueness than the previous two, starting with the non-Bowser antagonist. The fact that King Olly has a previous close relationship with Mario’s main partner Olivia is reminiscent of Count Bleck and Tippi from Super Paper Mario. This provides the foundation for a better story than Sticker Star or Color Splash. In addition, the visuals are undeniably beautiful. It has the best graphics of any Paper Mario game, and some areas are truly striking, particularly the desert oasis area. The huge con of this game is that is triples down on Nintendo’s shifting of the Paper Mario series away from its RPG roots and toward a more formulaic action-adventure approach. The major positive is that it seems to be a solid game in its own right, one which makes much better use of the new formula than Sticker Star or Color Splash did. It’s got loads of charm and some solid gameplay, but if you’re looking for an experience comparable to the first 2 or 3 Paper Mario games, you’ll likely be left wanting something different from it. 

 So let’s return to the original question. Based on what we discussed about each title, what makes a Paper Mario game great? I’ve done my best to narrow down what I consider to be the 10 most important criteria that, when met sufficiently, provide the best possible Paper Mario experience. These are:

A compelling story with unique characters

Partners to assist in combat and movement

Clever dialogue

Visually appealing art style

Exploration

Puzzles and Secrets

Cohesive world design with unique areas

An XP system which rewards combat

World development and lore

And finally, a willingness to go darker than other     Mario games

 There are plenty of other criteria I could add to the list, but these are the main ones which stood out to me as I analyzed each game for their strengths and weaknesses. 

 Answering the question of what makes a Paper Mario game great is not a simple task, nor is it an objective one. As I said before, my nostalgia for Super Paper Mario is a huge part of why I discuss it so positively. I truly believe it’s worthy of the praise, and I stand by the opinions I’ve stated for the other games as well, but my thoughts on each game in this series are my own, and many of you will and should have different thoughts on them. So share them in the comments, and keep it respectful! 

#paper mario #nintendo #video games #mario #super paper mario #paper mario ttyd #paper mario 64

[tfw-no-tennis]

One Piece Readthru

heyo ive decided its time for me to catch up on the one piece manga finally!! i last read it uhhh sometime late 2018?? MAYBE early 2019....anyways ill be liveblogging it, basically for myself but if anyone is interested then enjoy lol

so w.out further ado hers 927-931 hya 

uh ok i left off kinda in the middle of the wano arc, so im scanning thru some stuff to see what i remember.....i dont really remember what the deal is with that ginger (?) pompadour guy lmao. theres a lot of new characters and intricate politics in this arc from what i remember. 

i havent really gotten spoiled for anything....i know that something bad happens to kid & killer, somethins up w/sabo (but we dont know what), luffy fights kaido (more than once i think?) uhhhhh we get roger flashbacks and hear the yonkous bounties....thats abt all i really know. so im hype to find out what else has gone on....

im gonna start around 927, i defs read this but i want a refresher 

wow its amazing how sanji can oscillate so fast from being unbearable and annoying to like one of my favs

i loveeee the panels where those dudes start trashing sanjis soba stand and usopps like lol lets back up yall we KNOW sanjis boutta kick some righteous ass....YESSS

franky supplexing a guy....ily franky 

toko!!! i forgot abt her!!! cute kid, whats her deal? iirc she works at the uhhh wherever komurasaki works and she almost gets murderized later

sanji and little kids is so cute ;_; more of that and less stuff of him being gross w/women 

ok exposition....i do remember a lot of this

928, i feel like i remember this stuff so ill kinda blow thru it 

oh yeah i remember luffy n the prison shennanigans....good times

and kidds here too, talkin abt how he lost his arm trying to fight shanks...lol dude 

dude is really like oh i couldnt take down shanks, so ill aim for a different yonkou, im sure this will go much better a second time (and down an arm)

omfg i forgot abt this dude who apparently sold his FAMILY to get money for komurasaki....

i think we’re supposed to feel bad for this dude and think komurasaki is cruel or w/e but man honestly i just respect the hustle. girl knows whats up

HVBJSDKFBDS I FORGOT THE HILARIOUS LINE WHERE SHES LIKE ‘I HATE POOR PEOPLE <3′ IM....its literally like a weird twitter shitpost lmaooo

they cut immediately from komurasaki to tama asking momo if he has a sister....LMAO SUBTLE......

i dont even remember if that twist was spoiled for me, but either way it was my like immediate thought upon komurasakis intro lmao 

ok 929!

omg kanjuro selling some-drawn fish lol

OUGHHH CARROT AND THE OTHER MINKS....i miss carrot sm i hope she shows up more :( i really wish she would join the crew....

lmao that guy calling zoro a pretty boy and saying girls are probably all over him....zoros like uh ew no im gay 

OOOH PLOT SHITTTTT....caesar and doflamingo name drops...

VEGAPUNK HM [eyes emojiey]

orochis defs gonna get fucked up at some point. his design reminds me of wapol and other like corrupt king archetypes 

oguhfdbsjkgjdfbh laws head basket i forgot abt that. also i love when people call him traffy thats weirdly cute 

oh right the other supernovas who became kaidous bitches are here to fight...i recall that fight somewhat 

920 time! 

oh yeah the weird place where all the poor starving people laugh constantly...inch resting

OHH YEAH BIG MOM!!! man i definitely read a lot further than this lmao. w/e i was SO fucking hype when she showed up, imo the whole amnesia thing is pretty lame. we’ll see where it goes tho 

the art here is just so good oh man. the panel of big moms ship charging up the waterfall while she laughs? fantastic 

EPIC arrival. i hope big mom gets to do cool stuff even despite the impending amnesia

i ALSO hope her kids get to do cool shit too. im still holding out for a zoro vs amande battle (if shes even there? i dont see her, but thatd be such a waste)...and smoothie vs robin....

and she wants zeus back....NAMI FIGHT??? PLEASE???

oh its bdsm dinosaur guy....hmm never thought id type that

LMAOOOO law is like Dont You Dare Fucking Snitch On Us and usopp is like uh luffy pls come pick me up this guy is too hardcore

FINAL BATTLE thats so dramatic law please

sanji saying he’ll protect usopp omfg

oooh theyre destorying all the soba shops....here comes sanji to bring the PAIN

OMFG THE RAID SUIT i forgot he busts that out....hilariously quickly all things considered

931! ok but first my obligatory thots on how sad i am abt how the women of op look nowadays lmao revisiting old one piece just makes it all the more obvious how ridiculous its gotten....like nami and robin dont even look human, its insane, and the sameface has gotten so bad...idk i miss when op women used to look normal and could just exist without being Sexy Women bc that was a thing at the beginning and i really loved that...now its just like wow all titty no waist legs are 100x longer than normal....not to mention the writing for women in op has gone way downhill...ugh. ANYWAYS onward 

ofc as soon as i say that theres a rlly cute and p normal looking cover w/nami...i love her sm shes my fav character thats part of the reason this bothers me so much lol 

i miss her short hair tho...the long hair is pretty and i like her different hairstyles but i defs prefer the short spunky look. i wish she wouldve gotten a cool bellmere-esque haircut after the timeskip at least

ok im p sure i didnt read this...? i dont remember hgbvhjaksdfk

GERMA THEME SONG HBVJSDUIFJBSF are you telling me that the raid suit activation process involves a THEME SONG....please i need to hear this. thats so fuckign funny

‘GERMAAAAAAAAAAA’ [sanji doing an unironic magical girl transformation] IT CANT BE OVERSTATED HOW HILARIOUS AND AMAZING THIS IS LMAOOOOOO 

i think we saw this w/his siblings during whole cake but i forget lmao

of course franky and usopp are like OOOH FUCK YEAH 

HHBDSJKFJSB the implications of law knowing Exactly who that is....like i really need to see an omake of a campy power rangers/sentai/whatever-esque show/comic with all these germa personas omfgggggggg

and law having read the comics is SO funny 

also. sanjis hair is SO unfortunate lmaooo

O SOBA MASK HBVHSJDKUFJBDSK

germa was the bad guy group in the comics....good lmao 

law was defs a fan he knows ALL the lore LMAOOO

A BABY SANJI....and then sanji being weird. skip! 

ironic hows theyre like oh shit gotta challenge this dude so he doesnt destroy the town and their fight is gonna level the place anyways lmao 

oh i did read this i think cause i remember all those ninja busting robin for sneaking around

which ok theyre ninja but robin could grow eyes for surveillance so it doesnt make much sense that shed be caught so easily...alas

THAT GUYS HEAD HBVHJFKD LMAO

oh yeah then big mom washes up w/amnesia lmao. i hope that plotline doesnt suck, i dont have too much hope...normally i really like amnesia plotlines and honestly i think itd be cool to explore w/like one of the strawhats but in this case it just seems kinda like a lazy way to take big mom out of the game :/ my prediction is she’ll get her memory back at a certain time thats convenient to the plot, just in time for like an all out war w/kaidou and the straw hats and the yakuza maybe? we shall see (possibly) 

ok its past 6 am so its bedtime. more later! 

#LJ reads one piece #thats my tag now! #one piece #my posts #liveblog

[anorakofavalon]

The Beauty and the Geek: Why Brutasha Makes Sense

(AKA: An Open Letter of [Constructive] Criticism for Joss Whedon)

I wrote an essay in which I parse through my feelings on probably the most controversial pairing of the MCU. I settled on the relationship making sense, thematically, even though the execution was terrible. Sorry if it's a little long, but I'd love to have a discussion about this with any of you willing to take the time to read it.

---

Joss Whedon is great at his job. He’s flawed, like anyone else, but he’s a fantastic writer. I hardly need to remind you of his portfolio, after all. As a matter of fact, his portfolio is so very nearly spotless that his writing flaws come across, at least notably, in only one movie. Avengers: Age of Ultron. You might point out Justice League, but I’m discounting it because while there were flaws there, they weren’t all his, and not all of them were present in unison.

In Ultron, Whedon was pushed to his writerly limits. Understandable, considering that he was burdened with not only following up on the masterpiece that was The Avengers, but he had to do so while taking into account the events of the movies that took place between then and Ultron and where that left the characters. Not only that, he also had to setup the rest of the franchise and introduce a multitude of new characters. Doing any one of those three things is difficult, but doing all of them at the same time while also offering a coherent and enjoyable movie to fans is a monumental task. He did what he could.

One particular weakness of the movie, as pointed out by a large number of people after its release, was the relationship between Bruce Banner and Natasha Romanoff. Recently, people have warmed up to and adapted to it. But the damage is done. It left the impression on just about everyone that it was rushed and clumsily handled. I agree that it was clumsily handled, but I don’t think that it was necessarily rushed.

I’d like to make an argument for the relationship, and in doing so, maybe offer a critique to Mr. Whedon that might be helpful. My argument is the following: Bruce and Natasha’s relationship in the Marvel Cinematic Universe is thematically sound. It’s a natural step forward in both of their respective arcs, and I believe that Mr. Whedon made an excellent, and conscious, storytelling decision when creating the pairing. (He might even have had it in mind since The Avengers.)

But before I go any further on analyzing why I believe this, I think it’s important to dispel a few common and relatively superficial complaints about the couple. Firstly, some people prefer Natasha to have been with Clint, Steve, or even Bucky. I understand the general sentiment there, but I have contentions against any of these people because they don’t make sense in the context of the MCU. Clint is out of the picture because he has a family, and they are simply best friends, practically siblings to each other. Bucky and Natasha have very little screen time together in which they aren’t fighting by the time Age of Ultron happens. Steve is the most sensical of these options. But Steve and Natasha aren’t compatible people, at least not in the sense of a romantic relationship. Why? Because A.) She explicitly prefers more passive, “dorky” men, B.) Steve is still not over Peggy Carter, C.) Putting them together would be, aside from blindingly obvious, harmful to their wonderful friendship because D.) Steve and Natasha have, up to Ultron, had a very strictly professional relationship. They’re friends.

The other big complaint is simply that Bruce Banner seems to be too old for her. This is a, frankly, ridiculous complaint. Mark Ruffalo is one hot dude, and Black Widow is a fully grown woman perfectly capable of having emotions for whoever she damn well pleases. Somewhat older or not.

And speaking of those emotions, people have been quick to point out that they seemingly developed out of nowhere. I disagree, to a certain degree. The seeds of this have been rooted from the very beginning of The Avengers. Their first interaction was tense and interesting. Subtle things were present. Hints of flirtation (granted, at the time she was trying to manipulate and recruit him into helping SHIELD) were present, and there’s a few visual cues. Particularly when Banner says “I don’t always get what I want” while touching a crib. I recommend re-watching it.

And of course, there’s the entirety of Ultron, where they throw quick glances, outright flirt, and seem to have developed a close relationship via “the lullaby”. But the leap from Avengers to Ultron is quite wide, considering that a few things have happened, and besides, wasn’t she deathly afraid of the Hulk during Avengers? The answer to that is yes. And that’s why it was so jarring for practically everyone, including those of us who have embraced the ‘ship. Presumably, all of their bonding happened during Natasha’s stay in Avengers Tower between Winter Soldier and Ultron. The problem? We didn’t see that. We just saw that she could calm down the Hulk all of a sudden and had a good relationship with Banner.

I won’t defend the execution of this. It could have been smoother, without a doubt, but given the duress that Whedon was under with managing the storylines of literally every other character, I can forgive him. But what I can’t forgive him for is the execution of a few other things concerning the two. Namely, how he handled their conversation in the Barton household and the Ultron kidnapping.

The Barton Household conversation could have been positively wonderful. It was a little off-putting instead. I don’t think it’s a bad conversation mind you, it shows that Black Widow is willing to open up to Bruce Banner in a way she doesn’t usually do with others, and it really serves to humanize her further. The premise is this: Bruce Banner isn’t willing to be with her because he believes that he’s a monster and that he can’t give her a normal life (read: children). Natasha counters with the fact that in her view, she’s a monster because the Red Room made her one. And she can’t have children. The issue is clear: these are two separate, parallel, lines of conversation happening at once, and they get muddled, and viewers got confused accordingly. The way the dialogue was framed had disastrous consequences. Rather than achieving its goal the scene left us with the impression that she thought she was a monster because she couldn’t have children when really what she meant was that she was a monster because the Red Room dehumanized her and turned her into a weapon, and in the process, sterilized her.

While awkward, a lot of people later understood what was meant and the outrage died down. But it didn’t help that later in the movie, Widow was used as a literal damsel in distress when she was captured by Ultron for very little reason. Now, I’m a firm believer that strong female characters should be allowed to have love interests. Love isn’t a weakness. But this moment makes Black Widow seem like merely a love interest. She was helpless and a man had to rescue her. And it was, you guessed it, her love interest. This whole concept was a mistake. It could have been any other Avenger. Because if there’s one thing Black Widow is not -- it’s helpless. (And as a side note, that scene at the Avengers party where he fell on her chest? Ridiculous. Whedon pulled the same trick in Justice League and it was equally un-funny. It harmed his cause more than it helped. Comedy could have made the transition into the relationship less jarring for fans but he approached it in the single worst way possible. Also, the ass shots. What the hell Whedon? Like, I get it, but c'mon man. If you're gonna do it, at least be egalitarian and give us some Hulk booty too. Taika did it.)

All of these things combined gave people a less than spectacular impression of the couple at first, since it consumed both of their respective storylines for the entire movie, but I warmed up to it and so did others. Because despite the execution, I think it makes perfect sense thematically.

It begins in The Avengers. We’re going to briefly revisit the scene I mentioned earlier, where Natasha is recruiting Bruce. At this point we know a few things about them: Banner is relatively in control of the Hulk, but he doesn’t want to “Hulk out”, He is not afraid of Natasha, and finally, Natasha is very much afraid of him. At first she acts unfazed, but when he slams his hand on the table to test her there is genuine fear in her eyes and she pulls a gun faster than he can blink. He smiles away the tension, assuring her he was just testing her. But the power dynamic became clear. At first, Natasha believed she could manipulate him like she did Tony, but with Banner that wasn’t the case. He saw right through her. This remains a constant theme. He could read her like a book.

She’s weary of Bruce for the rest of the film, but it culminates when she faces the Hulk. Mr. Whedon lets the camera linger on her after her near death experience. Natasha Romanoff is shaken. This was incredibly humanizing for her because the Hulk is a force that she is truly powerless to do anything about, which must be an unfamiliar feeling for the world’s greatest assassin. Regardless, when Fury calls her to take down Barton, she walks it off. That encounter grew her character. A character that has remained fairly mysterious thus far except for one single moment, a truly wonderful scene where she manipulates the ultimate deceiver: Loki.

Loki thinks he’s got a read on her, likely because she was being very honest when she told Loki “I’ve got red on my ledger, and I’d like to have it clean.” Loki already knows, playing on her apparently emotional side by saying “Your ledger is dripping red, it’s gushing and you think saving a man no more virtuous than yourself will change anything?”

It’s all a trick, of course, because she pretends to let it affect her. But Black Widow knows how to compartmentalize emotions, and she handled the situation wonderfully. But I don’t doubt that what Loki said was true -- to a degree. That is Black Widow’s chief insecurity: that she is a monster, and she can never be a hero like the other Avengers because of her past.

A few scenes later, after the Hulk Out, Banner wakes up in a warehouse, where an old man is looking over him. The very first thing that he asked was “Did I hurt anyone?”. And that there is his chief insecurity: that he is a monster because he is a danger to everyone around him.

So you have two characters who both have terrible pasts that were forced on them by circumstances entirely out of their control. Both admire each other professionally as well as people. Let’s not forget that Natasha’s first interaction with Banner was of him living in an impoverished country in order to help people. Both are looking to become better than who they are, but I wouldn’t be surprised if Natasha was affected by this. Hulk has caused just as much harm as she has, but Banner is making up for it by healing others. She might feel she can’t do that because her skillset has always been to harm others. That’s why I think she’s one of the most compassionate of the Avengers, and always comforting her friends. Be it Steve at Peggy’s funeral, or Clint in Endgame when she’s the only family he has left. It makes total sense that Bruce and Natasha would turn to each other as friends and confidants. I don’t think anyone else in the group could understand their shared and unique type of trauma. And as Natasha said, “all [her] friends are fighters”. But Bruce is not. In her eyes, he’s a perfectly normal, mild-mannered gentleman. She’s not afraid of him or Hulk by the time Age of Ultron rolls around, but boy is he afraid of himself.

And they both want normality. So they propose running away. A bit on the dramatic side, but I can see why Whedon chose to use this idea. It makes the ending of the film more poignant, when she chooses to have Banner Hulk Out (and I suspect Banner understands why), thus sacrificing their fantasy of normality. Because they’re Avengers. The mission comes first. Still, it was far too melodramatic for my taste and out of character for both of them. Particularly Natasha. And again, it makes it seem like Natasha was Banner's love interest when it really ought to be the other way around, from a storytelling perspective and also because of the nature of the characters. That was a lapse in judgement from Whedon that weakened the presentation of their potential relationship.

I don’t think the relationship will remain completely intact by the time Endgame finishes, but I do think they’ll acknowledge it and give them a proper send off. It might not last, but their relationship helped them grow as characters. It allowed Banner to realize that he isn’t really a monster. That he is useful in his own right. And it helped Natasha get peace of mind. She isn’t a monster either, she’s a hero. And for better or worse, that means she has to do heroic things. Even sacrificing normalcy.

And plus, it's just adorable man.

#brutasha #brucenat #hulkwidow #bruce x natasha #hulk #black widow #bruce banner #natasha romanoff

[bigmoodword]

On Mary Sues and Underdevelopment (pt. 2)

In [Part One], I discussed how Mary Sues are often just underdeveloped characters in need of a character arc, and while character arcs are a great way to fix potential “sue-ish-ness,” sometimes that’s not enough.

Sometimes the problem stretches beyond the character, because for whatever reason, the rest of their story is underdeveloped too.

But that’s kind of odd, isn’t it? 

The Mary Sue* trope originated in fanfiction, so in theory, the character inhabits a fully developed world with other fully developed characters. In theory, most of the development is already done, yet if that’s a core assumption, we’re horribly underestimating what fanfiction authors actually do.

To write good fanfiction, an author must research the existing canon on top of developing their own twists, and that takes time. That takes patience. Ostensibly, an author’s work takes place in the same universe as their source material, but without a deeper understanding of the canon characters’ internal landscapes or the wider world’s mechanisms, the story starts to warp.

The original cast break character for Mary Sue’s benefit, and the world’s previously rigid rules bend whenever Mary Sue needs them to. 

Applying the same lens to original fiction can be tricky, because unlike fanfiction, there’s nothing to compare it to. Technically, there is no “out of character” or rule-breaking, because the world’s built by the story itself. However, it’s still possible to see the same warping effects...

footnotes —

*again, although this post uses the gendered name, i’ve never considered the trope female-exclusive**, so i’ve opted to use “they/them” pronouns instead of the typical “she/her.”

**gary stu and marty stu exist, but afaik those never quite caught on.

2ȼ (on story)

Underdeveloped original fiction features only a superficial setup. There’s a cast with set appearances and broad roles, such as mentor, sidekick, or love interest. There’s a generalized setting, like a major metropolis, and a vague plot, like “Mary Sue becomes the best superhero.” 

That’s pretty sparse, and just as in fanfiction, that underdevelopment can lead to some familiar problems.

The vague plot creates a disjointed story. One day, our superhero is hosting a fancy gala. The next they’re fighting aliens, and the day after that they’re saving orphans from a house fire. While it’s certainly possible to link these events with an overarching narrative, an underdeveloped plot has yet to specify what exactly those links are. The story jumps from one to the next, because the only goal is proving the character a great superhero. Consequently, that character is the only obvious throughline, and the work reads like Mary Sue’s fantastic to-do list.

Likewise, underdeveloped characters read like a list of people for the Mary Sue to help, get support from, or overcome. If readers get the chance to see what these other characters do when Mary Sue isn’t around, they’re usually discussing or thinking about Mary Sue. There is little to no hint of a life beyond that central character, because without further development, they don’t actually have a life of their own. They exist to fill whatever role the Mary Sue needs.

Put all this together, and Mary Sue stories are infamous for being The Mary Sue Show all the time, but again, the problem isn’t actually the Mary Sue. Rather, it’s the cardboard world around them. If there’s no real plot to direct the story and no set personality to guide the other characters, of course they warp to the Mary Sue’s whims!

Better developing these other elements can give them their independence, and one of the quickest ways to test whether or not a story is sufficiently developed is to, well, remove the Mary Sue.

To revisit Marvel’s The Avengers, if Tony Stark (Iron Man) didn’t exist, the other Avengers would still come together, still learn how to work as a team, and most likely, still take on Loki at the big climax. The exact circumstances may change, but the broad strokes would probably stay the same, because the other characters have their own reasons to pursue the main plot. At the climax, however, the story sans Tony fundamentally changes.

Tony is the character who takes a nuclear missile through a wormhole to destroy the Chitauri fleet and disable the forces already on Earth. As the only Avenger with true flight, he’s the obvious choice for this task, and because his suit gives out, he falls back through the wormhole before it closes, ensuring his survival. If he didn’t exist, what would happen instead?

It’s a stretch, but because Thor feels responsible for his brother Loki, he might try using his hammer to fling himself and the missile through the wormhole. If he succeeds, the heroes would still win, but Thor’s survival is even less likely than Tony’s. A similar scenario would play out if Hulk, in an overzealous rage, somehow jumped high enough to do the same, but either way, the team would probably have a true death on their hands.

Alternatively, without that tidy finishing move, New York City might cease to exist, because the Avengers are forced to 1) destroy the fleet on Earth and 2) fend off the World Security Council’s nukes. Maybe they eke out a victory but have to deal with all the collateral damage, or maybe they don’t and humanity falls under Loki’s control.

That’s an awful lot to consider. However, having flexed our fanfiction muscles to craft a theoretical, it’s possible to see why Tony Stark is so important to the story. At the same time, it’s also possible to see how, despite that importance, the plot and the other characters don’t fully depend on his presence. Whether or not he exists, the villains will still attack Earth, and because they’re well-developed, it’s possible to imagine how the other characters might act in a slightly different situation.

In a genuine Mary Sue story, removing the suspected Sue brings the whole thing to a screeching halt. The plot is so tailored to the character that it doesn’t change in their absence, it disappears altogether. The characters are so dependent on Mary Sue’s influence that it’s genuinely hard to imagine them doing anything interesting without their lead.

Obviously, not every character needs to be developed down to their favorite ice cream flavor, but every character should be developed enough to boast their own internal logic. Whether that means giving a recurring character their own character arc or simply picking a few relevant personality traits for the local barista, it should be possible to imagine the other characters going about their lives behind the scenes.

In the same vein, not every plot needs to sprawl across different worlds and feature an ensemble cast. Sometimes a plot is small-scoped and features a single protagonist trying to fit in at a new school. Maybe their ultimate goal is to make friends, and maybe the plot isn’t much larger than their main character arc. They’re the plot’s primary driver, absolutely, but in a fully developed story, events beyond their control will push the plot forward too.

Much like a puzzle, every story element works together to create a whole picture, and while a major character may be the piece that ties it all together, they’re still just one piece. Alone, they’re little more than a spot of color. Only once all the other pieces are assembled will that spot of color became the eye of a much larger portrait.

development resources

for characters

legit-writing-tips’s character worksheet

the internet writing journal’s guide to character profiles

writer’s digest nanowrimo character cheat sheet

for plot

story writing help’s plot worksheet (basic)

annie neugebauer’s plot worksheets (requires microsoft word)

jami gold’s story building worksheets (advanced)

for worldbuilding

eva deverell’s worldbuilding worksheets (basic)

ny book editors’ fantasy worldbuilding worksheet

the novel factory’s ultimate worldbuilding questionnaire (advanced)

shoutout to — @el-queen for the discussion that inspired this post and @mvcreates for an encouraging chat!

#tropes #mary sue #underdevelopment #part two #character development #plot development #worldbuilding

[maiji]

Finally managed to get my hands on a copy of Genji Days! (Thank you libraries ♥️) It's a selection of diary entries from Edward Seidensticker, the second of the "main trinity" of Tale of Genji English translators (Waley being the first and Tyler the third, of course), from the time period when he was deeply focused on this project. The entries run from 1970 to 1975, and it's not just Tale of Genji-focused; there's many other aspects of his day-to-day - slice-of-life snapshots, the politics of the time, as well as thoughts on/experiences with other classic and contemporary literature and writers, though ultimately the recurring theme/topic is the translation work.

I think any modern reader, no matter how much you love the Tale of Genji, would agree that reading it from beginning to end even just once is an endurance test. Translating it - trying to get into the author(s?)'s head and reverse engineer intent and meaning a thousand years later - is a darned intimidating and impressive task. On top of this, he was dealing with the shadow of Waley's work (generally considered a masterpiece of translation, yet also known as a rather "free" adaptation, with not an insignificant number of cuts and alterations). As a creator it's comforting in many ways to read Seidensticker's own worries and insecurities about what he's doing as he slogs through drafts and rewrites. And obviously he has some interesting and insightful things to say about the writing and characters, but he also has plenty of funny and sarcastic comments too (see second photo lol). Even when I disagree, I enjoyed seeing his perspective - and the changes in his perspective - as he progresses through the story and revisits it at different places and times. (He was bouncing around the US, Hawaii and Japan over the course of the entries - mainly Ann Arbor, Honolulu and Tokyo.)

The beginning of the book is lighter on mentions of the translation work, though in the preface he says the focus on Tale of Genji really started in earnest in 1966 but that there were translation drafts of parts even before this time. Mentions kind of drift in and out, and as you move further and further in time it grows stronger until he’s in his “intense” final stretches.

There’s a lot I enjoyed. Below are point form notes on a few things that stood out to me and I happen to remember at the moment.

Acts of translation and creation

I didn’t know that Seidensticker actually originally started with the Uji chapters and actually wanted to publish them alone before being talked into doing the whole thing!

His glee at finding translation errors (not creative translation license) when cross-checking his work against Waley’s translation made me laugh.

The level of detail and effort that went into the readthroughs and re-readthroughs - he reviewed and revised his drafts by checking against Waley’s translation and Murasaki Shikibu’s “original” text at the same time, to see where things differ or drift and to attempt to justify his reasons for his translator’s choices or at least feel good that what he had done wasn’t complete garbage. 

Theories and thoughts on the original author(s) and also trying to figure out the thoughts and intentions that Waley had when creating that renowned translation. Because of the whole reverse engineering aspect, I find it fascinating to read about translators getting a feel for the author’s voice, and then feeling out of sorts when they hit a part of the work that just doesn’t seem like it was written by the same person. He also had lots of commentary hypothesizing what Murasaki Shikubu might have planned in advance or not, and also wondering why Waley cut or edited certain things - and sometimes resignation that (paraphrased) “goddamn Waley was right, this part is a bore and killing me” lmao

His struggles on how to deal with character names and where to introduce them without it sounding stupid.

Thoughts on how translators, in an attempt to make dialogue sound natural, may often end up with characters that basically sound like them... because of course your own speech and mannerisms seem natural to you. Yeah, I feel this.

Some days loving his work and feeling effortless and then the next day coming to his work and hating it all. And nearing the end of finalizing his work and getting super zen-like and hitting a who-cares, whatever, let-it-out-into-the-world stride while still alternating and flipping over to anxiety and nightmares about it. So relatable. 

Having nightmares about losing his work in a fire and getting super paranoid and moving his copy of the final work and a nicely typeset copy so that they are stored at opposite sides of the campus. My level of paranoia.

Character opinions

Omg his love for Yugiri. LOL. If there’s one thing I came away with with regards to Seidensticker’s opinions on the characters, it’s that he thinks Yugiri is the bomb and deserves all the marriages and all the babies. And TBH, I like Yugiri a lot myself so this his commentary really made me remember why I appreciated this character so much... until the Yugiri chapter that made me nearly throw down my book. That chapter didn’t seem to bother Seidensticker though.

Related to this, Seidensticker doesn’t seem to care for Kaoru very much at all. I find this really interesting, because for me, many of the reasons why I like Yugiri are why I like Kaoru. Even more interesting - Seidensticker seems to very much prefer Genji to Kaoru, and even NIOU to Kaoru. Choo Won, the lady who helped him with retyping his drafts, makes a comment implying Niou is preferable to Kaoru as well (that Kaoru seems smaller and meaner if I recall correctly). I’ve actually not read Seidensticker’s translation of the Uji chapters, so it makes me wonder how much of that is also his bias implicitly coming through his translation (similar to the point earlier about how translators unconsciously make characters that sound like them).

His remarks on liking Yugiri and Tamakazura more and more as he works on the translation, and how as he gets older he prefers sensible characters to romantic ones. I feel this as well lmao

A growing appreciation for the Kokiden lady that mirrors my own feelings. (I have thoughts about Kokiden that I will share also whenever I get around to doing her illustration for the Genjimonogatari series.)

That he thinks the Suetsumuhana chapter is fantastic. YEAH I LOVE IT

Random sex stuff

I wasn’t expecting so much talk about pornography and collecting porn and critiquing porn. I particularly liked this: “Then I stepped into a movie to see how the pornographers might be doing. They have made no advances at all. It is still very much a matter of gasping and writhing under a blanket.” (This attitude completely reminded me of some fics/doujinshi I have read)

His getting invited to a Japanese host club and (separate incident) a sex toy shop in Shinjuku and being absolutely fascinated.

Being questioned about his sex life by a Noh actor. His diary entry is like (paraphrased) “I kept making up lies lollll I might have to answer to this one day...”

#tale of genji #genji monogatari #edward seidensticker #genji days #translation #japanese literature

[obsidianarchives]

Black Wizard History Month 2019 Round Table

Every February at Black Girls Create we celebrate Black Wizard History Month, a celebration of the Black characters of Harry Potter, Black Potterheads in fandom, and magical Black folks everywhere. This year our month-long turn up included live tweets, a live show of our #WizardTeam podcast, and fanfiction hosted through our Hogwarts BSU project.

Fanfiction is a large part of fandom, and in many cases can be a place for marginalized fans to see and write themselves into the stories they love. Hogwarts BSU is a project specifically for Black writers and artists to write stories centered around Black characters, history, and magic in the wizarding world. As a way to wrap up a jam-packed month, we decided to host a round table with a few of the writers of the pieces that came out during this year’s Black Wizard History Month.

How did you get into Harry Potter?

Bianca Ramos: When I was in 7th grade, my younger cousin was assigned books 1-3 in school. It was during the conservative Christian outrage and my family asked me to pre-read them for him since I was a "reader." I knocked them out quickly and was hooked.

Delia Gallegos: Growing up, the books always peaked my interest in the library, even though I was only 5 or 6 years old. Our household was pretty religious, so my mom was wary about letting me read them. One summer, my cousin lent me Sorcerer’s Stone while we were at my grandma’s. I only got a chapter in but I knew I HAD to read it. After a lot of begging on my part, my mom relented and agreed to let me read it under the condition that she could read the first one out loud to me. The rest was history!

Constance Gibbs: I started reading Harry Potter when I was in sixth grade and someone was reading Chamber of Secrets. I can’t remember if I read that one first or if I went to Sorcerer’s Stone, but I read all three that were out at the time and had my grandma take me to pre-order Goblet of Fire, which was about to come out. I’ve been hooked ever since.

Porshèa Patterson: In 6th grade, my then-bestie told me about the series but had already lent the first book out. That summer I picked up the books from the library after learning I'd never see this bestie again due to me changing schools. Thus, Harry Potter became my new best friend.

Have you read fanfiction before? What draws you to it? Or what kept you away from it?

Bianca: I didn't read fanfiction before getting into everything going on here at Black Girls Create. I don't know why. I guess I just never found myself on that side of the internet. Now I think I’m more open to it.

Delia: I’m a long-time fanfiction reader. I first started after the 5th book came out. At the time, it was just a matter of Harry Potter sparking my imagination and there being no material to satisfy it. So, I turned to the internet. Now, engaging with Harry Potter and the fandom in a creative way is almost second nature to me.

Connie: I didn’t start reading Harry Potter fanfiction until sometime after the series was over because I didn’t want to spoil the series as it was coming out. I think I tried in 2007, when the series first ended, but it didn’t stick. But a few years later, I read a few post-series stories. Usually shippery ones involving Harry/Ginny and Ron/Hermione, but I went through a big Lily/James Marauders Era phase and I occasionally read Remus/Tonks. For the romantic stories, as we discuss on #WizardTeam often, there wasn’t a lot in the text, so it’s nice to see others’ varying but often similar interpretations on how the canon relationships could have gone with more effort put into developing them. Plus I’m a fuzzy Hufflepuff.

Porshèa: I'd started reading fanfic during the lapse between books 4 and 5, began integrating them into canon thanks to some very vivid dreams, then promptly stopped reading because there were too many books to go for me to have those problems.

What made you want to start writing fanfiction?

Bianca: I was inspired by revisiting Harry Potter through #Wizard Team, by the short stories on the site, and the complete gas up I received when I shared my ideas in the Slack. The team is a wonderful place to bounce around ideas and everyone is really supportive.

Delia: I was really young (probably too young, admittedly) when I started reading fanfiction. I started writing it on a whim. It was very much, “Hey I want to do that, too!” so I did. Being that young, you really don’t care that you don’t know how to plot a story or that you haven’t even really finished learning about grammar. You just do it because it seems fun.

Connie: I’d never written fanfiction before Hogwarts BSU/#Wizard Team. I was content to lurk in whatever fandoms I was reading fic for. I think wanted to give it a try because of something Robyn and Bayana said on #WizardTeam, and that’s where my first fic, Do Black Wizards Nod, came from. The idea of whether the Black students give each other the nod and how they would deal with that. Then I kept getting prompts or fic bunnies and it feels so much easier than when I try to write original works.

Porshèa: I've recently taken to writing fanfic because I want to fill in the holes within the fandoms I love. I'm empowered to do so because of the community that BGC has curated, the validation of headcanons, and understanding that we're the best at crafting stories from our individual lenses.

What was your inspiration for your piece?

Bianca: The complete ball drop that was History of Magic in North America and J.K. Rowling ignoring valid criticism. Like most American fans, I was excited to see the wizarding world expand to include us. However, the fact that racism — RACISM — something that plays a major part in the development of the three largest countries here, isn't even recognized on a small scale is insulting to readers. You can't tell me that a country with a history as bloody and messed up as the U.S. has wizards of every racial background being besties. It's not realistic. I also understand that maybe J.K. Rowling felt unqualified to talk about it, but I believe it can be done in a way that is both careful and makes sense.

Delia: I’ve been preaching the good word of Deanmione since February 2018. Since coming aboard the ship, I’ve been surprised to find that I am pretty much the only person sailing on it. The existing fanfic of the pairing is sparse. So when To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before came out on Netflix, I fell in love again with the story (I had read the book) and the gears in my head started turning. Then, when #WizardTeam started on Half-Blood Prince, I realized that was the perfect fit.

Connie: I’ve written a few things now, but I like thinking about the Black students forming a group and watching out for each other. I was never part of a BSU, but in high school and college I went to predominantly white schools and found myself most comfortable around my peers of color. In high school it was just natural, gravity, but I think in college I sought it out more deliberately. So I could relate to Blaise’s desire to find/start a group to help him feel less alone on campus. I remember that feeling, though I can’t say I consciously channeled it when I wrote Umoja. Other inspiration included the idea of honoring Kwanzaa in a way that helped me connect with the holiday more than I do in real life, and finding a creative way to use each principal to tell a story. And further inspiration comes from Delia and the rest of the team being instigators.

"...if you want something written about Black wizards learning within the wizarding world to be done well, you've gotta roll up your sleeves and do it yourself."  -- Porshèa Patterson

Porshèa: The inspiration for my piece comes from the wandless magic conversations throughout the books — specifically when it comes to powerful wizards and house-elves — the disappointment that is Magic in North America, and Uagadou. All of the missing elements in these spurred me into writing, because obviously if you want something written about Black wizards learning within the wizarding world to be done well, you've gotta roll up your sleeves and do it yourself.

What are some things in Harry Potter canon that you would like to explore or fix?

Bianca: As mentioned before, we can fix History of Magic in North America. I think that exploring the wizarding world here could be pretty awesome. I'd love to see stories of Indigenous wizards, Mexican wizards, or a story of Japanese American wizards and wizard immigrants (especially if they are written by someone in that community). Why did they decide to come here and what have they experienced and endured since? Also, we need to get rid of that "Cursed" play and Dumbledore and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day prequels.

Delia: I started as a Harmony shipper, believe it or not. I read others, but that was my OTP. I was just so underwhelmed by the romance in the books. Since the series finished, my biggest sore spot has been the Epilogue. They went through so much trauma. How did they work through it to get to that happy ending? How on EARTH did Hermione end up with emotionally stunted Ron (sorry Ronmione shippers, it’s all love)? Why is Harry not the DADA professor? I'd also love to fix Leta's story. I wish she could have a fully fledged story that isn’t based in tragedy. A story where she lives and is happy. She deserved better.

Connie: Like Bianca said, the global wizarding community is one thing I wish we could fix in canon. Jo did such a poor job of thinking of anywhere outside of Europe and it really hinders the story when considering how global both the fans and the Muggle world, even in Britain, are. I also wish we could remove Fantastic Beasts and Cursed Child from existence. I wish Fantastic Beasts starred an actor of color for Newt and that it was romps in the jungle searching for beasts and perhaps treasure. I wish they were adventure stories set in the ‘20s a la Indiana Jones or the Mummy franchise and not…what it is.

Porshèa: While there's a lot that needs to be fixed — see everyone else's answers — I think I only have the patience to 'fix' the ways in which Black American communities practice magic, the integration of magic and modern tech — because there are too many Muggle-borns for this to NOT be a thing — and wizarding higher education.

Are there Black characters in other media you would want to write fanfiction for?

Bianca: As of right now, no.

Delia: I don’t really see myself writing outside of my own original work and Harry Potter fanfiction. Potter is the only world besides those of my own creation that I know well enough to write in. But who knows!

Connie: There have been so few Black characters that I relate to, and I find myself not reading fanfic leading them very often. I’ve read only a few characters that were Black in other fandoms, Abigail Mills from Sleepy Hollow and Chidi from The Good Place more recently. I think I also read some fic starring Tucker from Danny Phantom (throwback!) who the fans thought had good chemistry with Danny’s sister Jazz. But there are few characters in other properties I feel drawn to enough to write, which really makes me sad. Hopefully I get more characters to want to play with and can expand my fic reading beyond shiny white people problems (or anime characters, as was my fanfiction beginnings). Perhaps some day I’ll be drawn to Doctor Who fic for those Black characters, but it hasn’t quite happened yet.

Porshèa: There is a character from the A Song of Ice and Fire series that I relate to heavily, though we know very little about her. My goal is to start on a fanfic for her after completing the Founding Home series.

Do you think Black characters get enough love in fan spaces? Why or why not?

Bianca: It depends on who the story was written for. In predominantly white stories with white main characters, Black characters are usually thrown in as an afterthought, and it shows. The same goes with color blind casting and not adjusting the story to make sense for a person of color. On the other hand, you get stories written for Black characters and characters of color like in Scandal or Pose and there is this level of care that is woven into it that changes how the characters are viewed. Fans can't help but fall in love with a fully fleshed out character.

Delia: You can read Mel’s Critical Companion piece from this month for the long answer. The short answer is, no. At best, in fandom, Black characters are often overlooked, save for when they serve a headcanon for a white character. At worst, they are overly harshly scrutinized or rejected, even though they are often one character of color out of dozens of white ones.

"At best, in fandom, Black characters are often overlooked, save for when they serve a headcanon for a white character."  -- Delia Gallegos

Connie: Definitely not. I get sad when I think about how I perhaps perpetuate this lack of love by not talking about those characters enough or, more to the point here, not reading fic starring them. But also, those characters only have a few stories on the fanfic websites or don’t get as much screen time or development to work with. Or perhaps they’re not put in situations I want to think on too often, leading me to not even go looking for “fix-it” fic where writers fix whatever bad thing happens to them. And I think the stories I like with predominantly Black characters are in recurring works where I’m waiting to see where the actual author takes them. There may be something to the idea of me just being happy they exist and not wanting to mess with them too much. Two book series I think of are the Shadowshaper Cypher by Daniel José Older and Children of Blood and Bone by Tomi Adeyemi. The worlds are so new and I’m just so happy to get these great characters that I’m not looking for anyone else’s take on them just yet, but maybe that will come down the line. In more established franchises, I definitely think Black characters don’t get enough love in the fandom nor by the writers/producers.

Porshèa: What they said. I do love that the actors who portray the token Black faces call out the Black fan appreciation they get, especially when Luke Youngblood and Alfie Enoch pointed out that they'd realized that the Black fans made a point to seek them out within the films during BGC-led panels at LeakyCon.

What is a character or theme in Harry Potter that you want to write about or explore in the future?

Bianca: I have a list of things that I would like to write about in Harry Potter, and it seems to grow everyday. New schools, founders, and histories. I'd also like to flesh out some characters like Mrs. Zabini.

Delia: I think even after To All the Wizards I’ve Considered Before is finished, there will still be more to be told of Dean and Hermione.

Connie: I’m interested in exploring more Blaise/Desiree as a flourishing Black couple in the wizarding world and what challenges in their relationship they may have to overcome. Also just showing Black love cuteness. I think beyond the BSUverse, Robyn and I keep trying to come up with some post-First War detective story, perhaps involving an original character or Kingsley.

Porshèa: After Founding Home, I'm going to (someday) flesh out my Parvati, Lavender, and others boss witch writers story, and my Dumbledore and Prince ‘90s fashion-off story. More after that, maybe?

Make sure to read our guests and other writers’ pieces on our Hogwarts BSU page. If you have fic you would like published, or if you would like to participate in Black Wizard History Month in the future, feel free to check out our submission guidelines or hit us up at [email protected]. Thanks for reading, and we hope to see you next February and all the months in between!

#Black Wizard History Month #Hogwarts BSU #Harry Potter #fandom

[eclectia]

Silent Hill 2: As A Disabled Woman

Please be warned this piece discusses ableism and abuse, including murder, and contains a minor mention [just a passing plot-point, not elaborated upon] of childhood sexual abuse.

The Ancient Land is in its final stages- I'm finishing up the coding and there'll be a demo very very soon; so in my downtime I've been working out other concepts and brainstorming a lot of various things for what may or may not become my next project. There'll be more on those in the coming weeks, but I wanted to post something slightly different in the meantime to make up for the fact that I can't really keep posting “yep, still coding, still bad at it”.

One of the ideas I had revolves around a horror game, and in working out concepts for it I've been revisiting some of my favourite horror franchises – films, video games, and novels, to try and work out what makes me tick, what makes horror tick, and how I can make my game tick. In doing so, I replayed one of my perennial favourites in Silent Hill 2. As well as being one of my favourite games, it is widely held as one of the best horror video games to date, held up alongside Resident Evil, Clocktower and Alone in the Dark as a foundation of Survival Horror.

It had been some time since I last played it, and when I was a newly-diagnosed diabetic it resonated with me because of its portrayal of chronic illness, more specifically, that a character within the game had one. There weren't any games that dealt with that subject matter in such a visceral manner. At a young age, 11, I was processing my diagnosis and trying to understand how it would effect my whole life, a process which I am still trying to come to terms with and this was isolating to say the least. I was traversing my own fog.

Silent Hill 2 is not my favourite Silent Hill, that honour goes to 3 – teenage girls in horror!-, but it holds a special place in my heart, important during a time of my life where I was processing the lifelong grief of my new diagnoses. And, as I grew and co-morbidity –the tendency for multiple conditions to cluster around a primary condition - meant I had a great many other diagnoses, I found myself revisiting those claustrophobic streets as a source of comfort. It seems oxymoronic to play a horror game for comfort, but horror as a whole is a genre I have often retreated to during my darkest periods. There's safety in monsters too fantastical to exist. Yet, the real horror of Silent Hill 2 for me isn't in its psychological monsters but in the real fears of ableism and sickness.

I realised as I grew that Silent Hill's handling of and representation of illness was the reason for my constant revisits. It comforted, repulsed, terrified and saddened me and helped me process the guilt of being sick. As my relationship with myself and my disabilities [they're multiplying!] has evolved so has my reading and relationship with Silent Hill 2. There will be spoilers if you've not played it, so if you don't want it spoiled don't read any further.

I am in two minds about it on many fronts, mostly for how it handles and represents disability conceptually and literally. On the one hand, stories about how disabled people are burdensome and which usually end with their dying are a constant staple. We are a tragic love story, and in many ways Silent Hill 2 reinforces this- indeed, this is the crux of the story. The narrative of Silent Hill 2 is driven by its unreliable protagonist James Sunderland; his actions are frequently cast into doubt and Mary's right to live is what drives the main conflict within James' psyche, manifesting as the horrors of the game. Her slow death, James' desire to prolong and shorten her life, and how this conflicts with both of their wishes all form important narrative milestones. James and Mary both are cast in sympathetic lights, and many players come to understand through the naturally presented narrative that James was in the wrong. At least I hope so.

This journey of guilt mirrors the traumas of the cast of supporting characters, all of whom are dealing with guilt stemming from murder – Angela kills her sexually abusive father [which frankly I cannot criticise]; Eddie, bullied, snaps and kills a dog and perhaps a person although this is left ambiguous. Between Angela's self defence, Eddie's snapping and James' sympathy-killing of his wife, there are many facets and stages of guilt portrayed within this game. And in this world, moral greyness, like fog, presides. Yet I don't think I can agree with how yet again a disabled character is killed off to forward the plot of an abled protagonist and often we feel sorry and empathise with him by vice of his being the player character. We view the game through his perspective, and in controlling him the default perspective and empathy lies with him. This could be a problem if twinned with a player who's view and experience of disability is informed solely through media or second-hand experience. Being asked to sympathise with a character, especially one who killed a disabled woman, might lead to your average abled person simply thinking he is in the right because, concerningly, it is something they would consider. Within the context of real life this sad story -of a carer or lover who kills a sick partner, thinking it's the best thing for them- happens all too often. A very real horror for me.

Just a few years ago, in Japan nonetheless, an able bodied man slaughtered 16 disabled people because he felt they were better off dead. I am not inherently against assisted suicide, but this is not that. It is important to note there is a form of ableist abuse wherein abled people coerce disabled people that they're not worth anything, and would be better off dead. I want to make it clear that these two things are entirely different. This is not, explicitly, the situation in Silent Hill 2. There is an ending where Mary thanks and forgives James but it is also shown Mary does struggle with feelings of self-loathing during the course of her illness; not brought on by James in any way, at least not actively, and definitely something I as a disabled woman have dealt with, but worth considering. And, I think, abled people want to feel justified in their views on the worth of disabled lives, so perhaps the apology is there as a form of catharsis for abled people more than it is anything else. It is OK to sympathise with James, we'd all do the same in his situation, disabled people all secretly want to be put out of their misery. This is the unpleasant streak that runs through the game, the crux of where our sympathies stem from.

Having mentioned this, his actions are never actively condoned by the game. It is simply a harsh reality of ableism that often, abled people think they are putting us out of our misery or that our existence is inherently twinned with suffering. I don't think the writers of the game were aware of this when they wrote this in, they simply wanted a psychological angle to take so this accidental aesop is perhaps, a fluke. Many aspects of the game were planned and researched meticulously, but as far as I know none of the development team had any personal experience with illness, so the game comes from their wholly abled perspective.

As I have grown as a person, I have come into my own internal conflict with the themes and presentation therein of the game. When I was newly diagnosed with a condition that, at the time I was told would carve years off my life and which needed lifelong medication simply to function, I found solace in Silent Hill. James' struggle to understand and cope with the death of his wife was similar to how I was struggling to cope and fathom the life-changing diagnosis I had had. I think, perhaps, that when I ran through the streets again and again I was searching within the game, for some ways of processing the diagnoses I found myself saddled with. James mourned his wife of 3 years [3 days] dead, I mourned for a life drastically changed in a matter of days. James, struggling to understand his wifes' illness, was just like me struggling with mine. I was lost in my own fog, in the streets of my own head trying to come to terms with myself.

Bearing this in mind, as I have grown up and come to terms with my conditions my attitudes towards the narrative of Silent Hill 2 have changed. In it, illness is this fearful beast – it could be you! You could be sick!-, except I was; and I didn't want scares, nor did I find the implicit implications of illness scary in the same way an abled person might. What might be horrifying to an abled person was just a daily experience for me. I knew how scary illness could be. I wanted to feel normal.

Looking for normality in a horror game might feel extraneous except for when we take into consideration that many monsters in horror are stand-ins for minorities within society; the queers in the vampire, the proverbial “other”, the rejection of Frankenstein's Monster. Like them, the monsters in Silent Hill 2 all represent something, illness and the multiple perspectives of illness that James has, and I found it less comforting and more... melodramatic. Illness is a daily fact of life for me, and using my existence as a threat to abled people – you could be sick and burdensome just like Mary- just felt insulting. In Silent Hill, illness and sick people are as much the monster as James. Mary looms like Orlok's shadow.

As a character Mary is shown to be multi-faceted; James' manifestations of his guilt and feelings about Mary show her to be venomous, angry bitter, a monster spitting acid but her final letter to him reveals that she admits to this, but more than that: she is a guilt-ridden wife who knows her illness is effecting her spouse. It is heart-wrenching, and beautifully written, and as an ending monologue is poignant and reflected many of the feelings I have felt as a disabled woman. There have been times I have lashed out to people I love because of a particularly bad month of illness, and then the guilt comes because I am only human. Anger, pain and this endless cycle is an intrinsic part of Mary's character throughout the game, and despite it all, Mary is shown to be all that James wants. This is not a narrative fault, but a character flaw within James that he readily recognises and criticises repeatedly, and again, desire and the nature of it is wholly human.

Mary's portrayal within the game is both progressive and sympathetic, and concerningly backward. Mary is humanised in a way that very little media about sickness has ever done, and shown as a multifaceted and complex character just as James' own motivations and desires are shown to be both good, and bad. My readings of Silent Hill are in no way the only way to read it, and in no way lessen the story Silent Hill 2 is telling; it is an amazing, visceral game with a humanising and terrifying portrayal of how illness can take over lives.  

Silent Hill 2 holds a special place in my heart. At a time in my life where I was processing the first of many illnesses to grip me it allowed me to process and deconstruct my own feelings towards my mortality, dwindling health and illnesses. Experiencing and living with illnesses is isolating and lonely to say the least, not least because of how abled people treat us and I think Silent Hill almost nails that on the head accidentally.

This is not to say that people living with spouses who deal with illness should feel wrong, or guilty, for feeling bad about illness and I am not silly enough to suggest that illness does not have an effect on those around me; it does, but the way Silent Hill missteps is in showing illness as a singularly burdensome, corrupting thing, and offering justification for James' actions. It is left up to the player, ultimately, but I do worry for how abled gamers might perceive and justify James within the wider context of society.

There isn't much point to this post. Its just a ramble, and an internal struggle, I've dealt with for a little while and decided to finally try and hash out.

#Silent Hill 2 #disabled #disability