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sirenpearldust · 9 days

Text

Pearl

Part 1 part 2

Pair: Eris x Reader

Word count: 2.599

Warnings: mentions of cheating, fertility issues, insecure thoughts

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As months slipped by without conception, your mind wandered to the idea of a baby. You found yourself daydreaming about your future baby, wondering if they would inherit your traits or resemble Eris.

Maybe your future child would be a perfect blend of both of you, or a mirror image of Eris with his luscious locks, mischievous amber eyes accented by long, dark lashes, and his straight nose.

You hoped your child would resemble your wonderful husband, with his charming laugh, his thoughtful frown, and all the beauty he possessed.

As you stood before the mirror, you gazed at your belly, imagining it swollen with pregnancy.

Your mind wandered to your child laughing, giggling, and cooing with joy, happiness radiating from their bright eyes.

You felt stressed as numerous people, especially Beron, exerted pressure on you. However, Eris remained your source of comfort, always sweet and wiping your tears, soothing you whenever the healer delivered the disappointing news of another unsuccessful conception.

Eris concealed his relief upon learning of the unsuccessful attempt, careful not to show you his true emotions. Despite this, his desire to fulfill your every wish remained strong, understanding that the timing had to be right for both you and your future heir's safety.

He saw you trying everything—from taking long walks with his mother to eating healthier, experimenting with various fertility teas, and praying.

Despite trying everything, nothing seemed to help. He witnessed your tears and mourning, understanding your sense of shame for not fulfilling what you saw as your only duty.

Eris, feeling responsible for your anguish, was ashamed, as he was at fault making you feel this way.

To help you relax and ease the strain on your body, Beron ordered that you be sent to your parents' house. The Lady of Autumn spoke with Beron, suggesting that a vacation could alleviate your stress and potentially increase your chances of conceiving.

• •

Being at your parents' house proved to be truly relaxing. The familiar surroundings provided comfort, surrounded by your loved ones. You spent time chatting with your sisters and reconnecting with friends you hadn't seen in a while.

Enjoying tea and playing cards together, the conversations and laughter helped you forget all of your worries.

In your childhood home, you were surrounded by laughter and joy, you felt whole and content.

It was a stark contrast to the tension and loneliness you experienced in the forest house, where rivalry, scheming, and jealousy were ever-present.

There, in the forest house, you always felt on edge, but here, in the comforting embrace of your childhood home, the atmosphere was vibrant and carefree.

The air was filled with the joyful laughter of children, and the warmth of your friends' companion enveloped you, easing away any lingering worries you had.

You couldn't help but wish for your child to grow up in such an environment. Perhaps not falling pregnant right now wasn't the worst outcome after all, you sadly mused.

Today, the weather was warm, carrying the scent of the black tea your mother brewed and the cherry cake your sister baked earlier.

Laughter echoed through the garden where you sat, accompanied by the sweet singing of the birds.

The sun shone just right, casting a gentle glow, and overall, the atmosphere was calm and serene.

The atmosphere was abruptly disturbed by your friend's gasp as she remembered something important.

"Oh my, I almost forgot to tell you what happened to Cassandra, you all remember her, right?" she exclaimed, her shock evident as she jumped in her seat.

"Her husband had been cheating on her, and despite her attempts to have a second child with him, he remained loyal to his mistress.

To prevent any illegitimate children with her, he resorted to using a tonic, it hindered any chance of pregnancy. Apparently it is also illegal to use.

Cassandra's father found out, killed the mistress and punished her husband by law."

"I don't know what happened exactly, but Charles now has a scar across his face," another friend chimed in.

"And lately, he's been sticking close to Cassandra when they are at gatherings. Apparently the punishment he faced was only halted because she intervened and saved him from her father. Since then, he's been keeping in line."

"That was well deserved," your mother chimed in, sipping on her tea with a hint of satisfaction in her voice.

As you listened, doubts began to creep into your mind.

Maybe someone had tampered with your tea. However, your handmaids assured you that they hadn't seen anyone interfere with your food or beverages.

Every step of the preparation process, from the ingredients to the serving, had been strictly monitored.

Despite the numerous intimate sessions with Eris each day, it seemed impossible that there could be an issue with fertility.

However, hearing the conversation about Cassandra's situation sparked a troubling thought: what if the problem lay with Eris? Could he be infertile?

The notion of him using a tonic seemed absurd, and the thought of him resorting to such measures was too cruel to contemplate.

He had wiped away your tears and shielded you from harm, from the rumours, the nasty glances directed at you.

You couldn’t entertain such a devastating possibility—betrayal from him would be unimaginable.

He talked to you about the names he had chosen and the colors he envisioned for the baby's room. Every time you talked about your future child he was happy, excited to help choosing the clothes and how he would play with him or her. He didn’t care if it was a girl or a boy.

You both had laid in bed one night, when he confessed his hope that the child would resemble you. He had held you close, your fingers were intertwined, his head on your chest, he wished that your child would inherit your eyes and your smile.

He wouldn’t cheat on you, no he wouldn’t. Not Eris, never him, right?

You obviously would never openly accuse Eris of such a horrendous act or him using the tonic.

Accusing the heir could result in dire consequences, you would be risking your life and insulting the Vanserra family to which you still didn't fully belong to.

You understood that full acceptance into the family would only come with the birth of his heir.

For now, you felt more like a placeholder, knowing that if nothing worked, you could easily be replaced by a new wife.

• •

The evening neared its end and your friends departed, your family prepared for bed.

Quietly, you made your way to your father's office, seeking help to calm your nerves before you also joined dreamland.

In the cold hallway leading to his office, you closed the window, the chill dissipating.

Taking a moment to glance at your reflection, you noticed your hair cascading loosely around your shoulders, and your nightgown, a deep red with golden accents, gave you a regal air.

Compared to a week ago, you looked healthier, your cheeks now filled out.

Gazing past your reflection, you turned your attention to the sky, silently praying and hoping that your father held the answers you needed.

Approaching the grand oak door adorned with golden leaves, you knocked twice.

"Come in," your father's voice called from within.

Upon entering, you found him engrossed in his papers, his glasses resting on the bridge of his nose. The office carried the aroma of black coffee and biscuits.

Closing the door behind you, you stood before him, clearing your throat to gain his attention.

"Father, have you heard about what happened to Cassandra?" you inquired.

He rubbed his face in frustration before replying angrily, " Good evening to you too. Yes, but I prefer not to indulge in gossip or spread it myself. Why do you ask?"

"It's not about the gossip itself, but about the tonic," you clarified.

His eyes widened in surprise as you quickly added, "Don't worry, I'm not asking to brew it myself. I'm just curious why it's outlawed and what it consists of."

Reassured, he sighed and admitted, "There is a book in the library somewhere. I forgot the title of it." With a smile, you bid him goodnight and wished him a restful sleep. "Goodnight. Sleep well," he replied before you left.

As you walked towards the library, a peculiar sensation stirred in your belly, akin to butterflies fluttering about. Nervousness and a certain cold crept over you, you had a sudden urge to relieve yourself.

As you walked into the library, you skimmed through the books, spending about two hours in the healing section.

Along the search for the specific book, you stumbled upon some intriguing ones that you planned to read later.

Eventually, you found a small black book titled "Outlawed." Within its pages, you discovered a chapter detailing the forbidden tonic.

It described how the tonic could hinder any pregnancy without causing infertility, with a minty scent and a taste like honey.

You stopped breathing, the realization hitting you like a tidal wave.

Eris used to drink a similar concoction in his office every morning—minty and tasting just like honey, just as described in the book.

You remembered how he once swiftly took the drink out of your hand after you had a sip, warning that it wouldn't be safe for a woman.

At the time, you hadn't thought much of it. But now, everything pointed to your husband being the one who used the forbidden tonic. Tears streamed down your face as you realized his betrayal.

You sobbed, as your mind raced through the events of the past few months.

You remembered how Eris had taken care of you, reassuring you that you weren't at fault for the failed conceptions. You went through every moment you had with him, his reaction, how he didn't mourn.

Now, you saw the deception clearly, realizing what a fool you had been to fall for his lies.

He had truly lived up to his name—the cruel prince of autumn.

You never anticipated that you would become a pawn in his schemes.

Questions swirled in your mind. Did he, like Charles, have another woman by his side?

Was he in love with someone else?

Jealousy gnawed at you. Why couldn't he confide in you? After all, you were friends before you were married.

Feelings of stupidity washed over you. Why did you even care now? He had lied to you, and he was probably involved with another woman. There wouldn't be any other reason to use the cursed tonic, right.

Why? Why? Why?

Why would he do it?

• •

You cried the whole night, your eyes swollen and bloodshot red by morning.

Your back ached from falling asleep in the library, and you felt chilled to the bone. Your heart raced with anxiety as you glamoured yourself to avoid questions from your family.

As you dressed and looked into the mirror, doubt crept in.

Were you truly beautiful and put together, or were you actually ugly? Worries plagued your mind—perhaps you were too clingy, or maybe you simply weren't his type.

Did he even find you attractive at all?

You forced a smile as you gazed at your reflection, but your eyes appeared lifeless, devoid of their usual sparkle. No amount of glamouring could mask the emptiness within. Tears welled up, but you quickly wiped them away.

With a frustrated huff, you adjusted your clothing, trying to compose yourself. Taking a deep breath, you headed downstairs.

The tearful goodbyes were exchanged as you hugged everyone farewell.

Standing outside the manor, you waved goodbye to your family before winnowing away.

• •

You arrived in your room after being attended to by the maids, your personal attendants taking charge of your bag.

Finding yourself alone, Eris was nowhere to be found, but he had left flowers on the vanity along with a letter.

Opening it, you read his words:

Hello, Beautiful.

I hope you enjoyed your time with your family. I have missed you dearly I hope you have missed me too.

It was quite lonely without you. I’m blessed to have you. Without you I am not complete nor at peace.

I promise to give you the life you've always wanted and to provide for you. I'll stand by you through thick and thin 'till death do us part. So don’t ever worry about anything else.

Sadly we will need to join dinner today as my Father has invited us.

Please tell me everything you experienced, what you’ve baked, eaten, played and read.

I also have planned a surprise for you (;

Yours truly, Eris.

You crumpled the letter in your hand, before burning it with a flicker of magic. It would have been sweet if you hadn’t known him to be a liar.

Erecting a barrier around the room to ensure privacy, you screamed and cried out your frustration until your throat grew hoarse and your eyes were dry. Once you stopped, you undressed yourself, feeling the need to wash away the disgust you felt from letting him touch you. A soothing bath would probably help.

• •

Out of the bath, you called for Erica and Grace. Seated at the vanity, Erica dried your hair while Grace selected jewelry for you, presenting it. Today, you decided on wearing a mauve dress, as you were in no mood for vibrant colors like red or orange. Frankly, orange made you look terrible, and you weren't in the mood to deal with that today.

They both appeared nervous, avoiding your gaze as you smiled at them. Sensing their unease, you asked, "What's wrong, girls?"

"Nothing, my lady," Erica replied, but before Grace could answer, you noticed her hesitation.

"We don't want to upset you before dinner," Grace added, her voice faltering.

Your smile faltered as well, a nervous feeling creeping over you.

Your heart began to beat faster as you sensed that something was amiss.

"I would rather know than be kept in the dark," you insisted, turning towards them.

They exchanged a hesitant glance before Erica spoke up quietly, "We have seen the prince meeting with a woman on the days your ladyship was away."

Your heart skipped a beat, but you forced a tight smile and urged them to continue. "Go on," you said, encouraging them.

"The woman doesn’t work here, and we tried to find out more about her, but we’ve found nothing," Erica explained.

"Don’t worry, she's not pretty. You are prettier than her," Grace added quickly.

You couldn't help but chuckle at her remark.

"She's charming enough to keep my husband occupied," you said wryly, a hint of bitterness in your tone.

"Tell me everything you know," you demanded, your voice steady despite the rage burning within you.

"She's a blonde and quite tall, with red eyes," Erica began, and Grace nodded in agreement.

"They also seem to be close. Every time we saw them, they were closely huddled together," Erica continued.

"They would whisper, but we didn't see them being intimate or kiss. They mostly met in the forest or inside the stables," Grace added, her voice tinged with concern.

Meeting a woman in secret usually hinted at an affair behind one's wife's back.

"Alright, please keep an eye on them, but don't put yourselves in danger. If Eris finds out, tell him that I, as his wife, had ordered you two to keep an eye on him. If he asks why, tell him he should confront me, as it is our business," you instructed firmly. Both Erica and Grace nodded, understanding the gravity of the situation.

You stood up, inhaling deeply to steady yourself, and forced a smile at them.

At least now you knew the truth: he had used the tonic, used you for pleasure, lied, cheated, and deceived you. The realization made you feel sick to your stomach. You wanted to take a bath again and scrub your skin.

You knew you had to get out of this situation, whether dead or alive, though preferably alive. Perhaps you could even stage your own death to escape his grasp once and for all.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Main Taglist: @bubybubsters

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lovelyyandereaddictionpoint · 1 year

Note

The triplets kittens snuck in to NRC to see their big sister figure Crewle daughter, and seeing her they all are happy and admire her alot, and she adore them as if they are their siblings

What's more that childhood friends knows if you're close when they called you big brother

Vil, Leona, Azul, Jade, Floyd, and Deuce be when the kitties calling them big brother and quietly said " can you marry big sis (yn)?? We think you'll be a good mate/husband for them "

The Kittens | Crewel Daughter Reader

The kittens would rather infiltrate the princess academy because that is where you usually are

And when they do they’re pampered beyond compare

So its entirely different when they end up in NRC

Now the thing with NRC is that the school is on a private island

That takes a lot to travel to anyway

So the only way they’ll end up there is through nefarious means

Beating up and apprehending their kidnapper

They don’t know what to do but they recognize their beloved godfather

“Ah my little kittens, what are you doing here?”

Appalled by their journey

he takes good care of them and eventually the beast children meet your obsessive suitors:

Vil Schoenheit

“So Miwster Vil?”

“Yes, young Marie?”

“Awr you taken by anyone?”

“You mean…romantically? Well, you know me and (Y/n) have been together since the beginning.”

“Ooooh so you’ll marry godsiwster one day?”

“Hehehe, yes.”

He knows he’s destined to be with you

He’s just happy your godsiblings can recognize him as your lover already

He treats them well despite Toulese and Berlioz puffing their chests at him

Whipping children into beautiful shape is his expertise

Naturally, when Duchess is finally able to pick them up she recognizes him

“Oh thank you, Vil! Their hair! And their dress! They look divine! But even in your youth, you were such a proper gentleman!”

“Why thank you, Duchess. Your praise is an honor.”

He expects this will carry over when Duchess and Marie talk next

Leona Kingscholar

“Hey! Big Bwother!”

“Ugh what?!”

“Are you gonna marry (Y/n)!?!?”

“What?”

“Big sis! Are you gonna be her mate fwor life?”

“...Yeah, if anyone tells you different bite them for me.”

“Yes th-thwir!”

Toulouse the little orange cat boy is set on following the strong lion around

Similar to Cheka in that he endlessly follows Leona around

But his energy is more like Jack in that he admires the dorm leader’s strength and coolness

He doesn’t immediately push him away because he’s so familiar with you

He knows this kid will be singing his praises to you when he finally meets back up with you

“Y-your highness!? I apologize for any trouble my son might have given you!”

“It’s fine. The little tiger is definitely going places.”

“I’m so grateful! Thank you, your highness.”

Yeah, he better deliver

Maybe putting the wall of you visiting if the little tike ever wants to see him again

Azul Ashengrotto

“You’re vewy smart big browther!”

“Why thank you!”

“Will you marry big sis (Y/n)?”

“E-excuse me?”

Berlioz takes to his side right away

Proudly wearing his tie as he cutely escorts guests around

His glasses fog up in heat as he imagines what your kid would be like

Not only will this kid give him rapor with you

The Duchess is a renowned noble in the Shaftlands

A wonderful investor and corroborator for any romantic ventures

“It was an honor tending to your child, he was a pleasure.”

“Well, that certainly puts me at ease. You’re such a bright young man it's hard to believe your so young. Your maturity reminds me of (Y/n) do you know her.”

“Oh I do. More than you’d believe”

Jade Leech

“Well here you are little lady.”

“Why thank you Jade! You truly are quite the gentleman. Big Sis (Y/n) would looove you.”

“Oh would she?”

“Mmmhmm I’ll tell her about you when I get home. But! You have to let me be the flower girl at your wedding, okay?”

“Yes, m’lady.”

He’s got his gentleman butler+ act on lock

Perfect for catering to Marie’s little lady personality

And like a little noble lady she makes promises and is bound to gossip

Which seems to be in favor of Jade

Who smiles as he recognizes the behaviors that she’s copied

From you of course

“Duchess your daughter was a lovely guest.”

“I can’t help but thank you for taking care of her.”

“And I humbly accept.”

Floyd Leech

“Oi oi where ya going so fast?”

“I’m running because I know I need to train to be the fastest tiger ever!”

“Ah? Then let me help you!”

“Wow! You're so fast and strong! I’d say you're a perfwect mwate for Big Sis (Y/n).”

“Yeah I think so too.”

He enjoys the seemingly endless energy of Toulouse

He only runs faster because he’s pumped just thinking about you in the future

Sitting back while he runs with your little one

It's just a matter of time

“Thank you, Floyd. Toulouse is tired out but it seems he had fun.”

“Yeah we did! He was a blast!”

He thinks fondly of him but doesn’t expect much until you thank him later

Deuce Spade

“Ya ever think about marryin’ Big Sis (Y/n)?”

“W-what?! What are y–”

“I think you should. I'd like to have more fun with you!”

He doesn’t connect that Berloiz and you are related in any way

Until the little cat boy flicks his ears as Deuce offhandedly swoons as he talks about you

When he does he gets flustered

Before getting laughed at and going back to playing with him

He bows deeply to Duchess when she returns

“T-thank you for being there for (Y/n)! Consider this a small thank you for that!”

“Oh? Such vigor for a young man. Well, I am grateful you watched over my little gent. I’m sure (Y/n) would be pleased as well.”

“R-really?!”

He can’t help blushing aggressively at your name

He hopes the duchess doesn’t laugh at him when she tells you

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fantasyescapes17 · 10 months

Text

Closed Doors (Part 2)

Soonyoung had made peace with his station in life. A younger son of a little-known family, he was not set to inherit a fortune and had nothing to recommend him but his bright personality. Nobody expected Soonyoung to make the match of the season. But when you- a woman with ties to the royal family and riches beyond his imagination, a Duchess in your own right- seeks Soonyoung's hand in marriage, his life begins to spiral entirely out of his control.

Genre: Hoshi x female!reader. Regency!AU. Your title is the Duchess of Graham but your first name is not mentioned.

Warnings: Wedding night so mentions of sex but nothing explicit is described, it fades to black. Not even remotely historically accurate. Much like Bridgerton, this is all about the aesthetic.

Word Count: 7.5k+

Part 1 Part 3

Series Masterlist [This is not the first installment in this series- it is strongly recommended to visit the Masterlist and read the installments in order as they are all interlinked and the timeline can be confusing.]

"I've known the Duchess for most of my life," Viscount Hong explained as the carriage rattled along the cobblestone streets. "Our late fathers were close friends. My sister and I spent a few summers at the Graham's duchy in our childhood; although my sister was probably too young to remember much of that."

Soonyoung tried to focus on the Viscount's words, but it was difficult to hear them over the sound of his own pounding heartbeat. The two gentlemen were on their way to your manor now. Soonyoung had asked to speak with you himself, though as the manor looked closer, he was beginning to regret his decision.

What was he going to say to you? What did one even say to a Duchess who had proposed marriage after a single conversation? Thank you?

Soonyoung cleared his throat and tried to focus on the conversation. He needed to understand as much as he could from the Viscount before he faced you.

"Did you never think of marrying her yourself?" Soonyoung asked.

Viscount Hong looked surprised. "Oh- erm… not with any real seriousness. I will admit our late fathers may have preferred it. The Duchess is a good person, but I am not sure we were ever compatible in that way."

"So you were not compatible with her," Soonyoung replied in mild disbelief as he looked at the handsome, rich and otherwise impeccable Viscount in front of him, "but somehow you think I am compatible with the Duchess? Me? The second son of the Kwon family who doesn't have a single useful talent or penny to his name, me?"

The Viscount Hong sighed.

"Soonyoung, think about this rationally. The Duchess is a young woman who has no surviving family and has been burdened with a title, fortune, and dukedom that nobody in the ton thinks she should have. She did not even have a chance to properly mourn her father; the moment he died, there were petitions submitted to the Queen by noblemen protesting her title and seeking to take her lands from her. She is fighting a battle against some of the most powerful men in the country, all alone. What do you think she wants in a husband?"

Soonyoung stared at the Viscount blankly.

"I haven't the slightest idea," he admitted.

The Viscount pressed his fingers to his temples. "She wants someone she can trust, Soonyoung. She came to me for help. I will not lie to you. I did introduce her to other eligible gentlemen. For some reason, she turned them all down. The Duchess only expressed an interest in you."

Soonyoung felt nauseous. "But we only talked about cakes."

"What?"

"At the ball. During our dance. I was nervous and she asked me why her ball exceeded the usual London ones, so I told her she had a better selection of cakes. That is all we talked about during the dance, Viscount Hong. Cakes," Soonyoung admitted worriedly. "I just can't understand why she would…"

The Viscount smiled.

"You had better ask her yourself, then. We have arrived."

—----------------------------------------------

The Duchess' manor was as intimidating and magnificent as Soonyoung remembered it. He still felt unworthy to walk these grand halls. He followed Viscount Hong anxiously as a servant led the two gentlemen towards one of the many drawing rooms that Soonyoung had never set foot in before.

"Viscount Hong and Mr. Kwon are here, Your Grace," the servant announced their arrival.

You were seated near the window, but rose gracefully to greet the gentlemen. Soonyoung was struck once again by your beauty. In the absence of the sparkling lights of the ball and the heavy jewellery, even in the simple pale morning sunlight, you were still the most beautiful creature he had ever laid eyes on.

"Thank you for coming," you said to them both in your soft, lilting voice. Your smile- the beautiful one that Soonyoung noticed still did not quite reach your sad eyes- made him almost forget to greet you with the proper decorum.

"Your Grace," he choked out quickly, bowing his head.

The Viscount glanced between the two of you with an amused smile. "Well, far be it from me to intrude upon your conversation any longer than necessary. I have brought a book that I am quite keen to read. I will employ myself accordingly. I only ask that if your conversation takes too long, I might be served some tea."

"I have sent for some tea already," you promised the Viscount, who retreated to the far corner of the room. He made a show of seating himself as far away as possible, facing in the opposite direction from you both and burying his head in his book.

You turned to Soonyoung.

"Mr. Kwon; please, have a seat."

Soonyoung walked with shaky legs towards the small table near the window. There were two ornate chairs on either side- he sat across from you and took a deep breath. His hands felt clammy.

"Thank you for coming," you repeated to him softly. Your hands were folded politely on your lap. "I must apologise for not approaching you directly on this matter, Mr. Kwon. Considering how brief our acquaintance has been, I thought that if you were not inclined to matrimony or wished to reject my proposition, you may have been more comfortable expressing your response to Viscount Hong. I am very glad you asked to meet me.”

Soonyoung stared up at you with wide eyes.

“That is… very considerate of you, Your Grace,” he said politely. The mere thought of hearing your proposal directly from you instead of from Viscount Hong made his palms sweat. Soonyong was certain that his current position was far preferable.

You smiled at him gently. “You must be… surprised.”

“I will not pretend that I anticipated any of this.”

“Allow me to explain,” you began carefully. “I am sure the Viscount has given you an indication of my situation. I lost my father- the late Duke, a few months ago and have inherited his title. I have no surviving family and the reception from the ton and other titled noblemen to inheritance of the lands and title has not been… entirely positive,” you explained. Soonyoung watched you, captivated. You spoke calmly, and a faint strain in your voice towards the end of your sentence was the only indication of any loss of composure.

Soonyoung cleared his throat. “I-I am sorry to hear that.”

“Thank you,” you replied simply. “While I am relieved that my family’s legacy is not lost, I must admit that the role of a Duchess is not one which was designed to be played by a lady alone, particularly not an unmarried one. In addition to the friction from the other noblemen, my position makes it difficult for me to do justice to my duchy. It is also important that I secure the future lineage of my family so that my father’s efforts are not in vain. I am explaining these things to you, Mr. Kwon, so that you are better able to understand my reasons for needing to marry soon.”

Soonyoung nodded. “Yes-yes, of course, Your Grace, I understand.”

A servant entered the room with some tea and biscuits. You paused and waited for her to pour you each a cup, and directed the servant to send one over to Viscount Hong in the corner of the room. Then you turned back to Soonyoung and watched him put two sugars in his cup.

“I see you have a sweet tooth,” you remarked with a small smile.

Soonyoung’s ears turned pink and he froze halfway through stirring his tea. “I-I, erm. Yes, yes, I am partial to a little more sugar than most,” he admitted self-consciously. “I apologise. I should perhaps try not to consume so much of it…”

Your expression was gentle as you looked up at him. “I do not think a habit of excessively sweetening one’s tea is the worst vice a gentleman can have, Mr. Kwon. Viscount Hong speaks very highly of you.”

Soonyoung’s ears reddened further and he coughed. “I-I did not realise you spoke to Viscount Hong about me, Your Grace.”

Your eyes dropped down to your tea and Soonyoung saw a flash of that familiar sadness in them for a moment before you spoke. “I have been finding it… difficult to trust people of late. Some of my father’s closest allies signed a petition to have my title revoked. Others have made underhanded attempts to orchestrate a match with their sons and usurp my duchy. Viscount Hong is the only nobleman I can still trust. That is why I sought his aid to find a suitable husband. I considered his judgement to be more impartial and reliable than anyone else I knew.”

Soonyoung nodded in understanding. It was becoming increasingly clear to him now- this was a very delicate situation that extended beyond frivolous gossip and societal opinions. This was about politics and land and power. The Viscount had been doing you a favour by being vague at the ball a few nights ago. It would not be appropriate for the entire ton to know that the Duchess of Graham had turned down most of the offers made to her by noblemen and was seeking a husband elsewhere.

Soonyoung bit your lip. “I am sorry that you are in this position, Your Grace,” he said carefully. “But I must commend you for placing your faith in Viscount Hong. I doubt I could name anyone with more integrity or honesty than the Viscount.”

You bit back a smile. “I am glad you think so. Because the Viscount led me to you.”

Soonyoung cleared his throat. “Yes. Yes, he led me to you. I…”

You set your tea down and took a deep breath before lifting your eyes to meet Soonyoung. He was stunned into silence by the power of their gaze. There was a deep, deep sadness in your eyes but he also saw strength and gentleness.

“I apologise for putting you in this situation,” you told him honestly. There was a hint of regret in your soft words. “This is hardly the most romantic way in which to propose marriage and I am sure it cannot be flattering to you to be put in this position. I assure you, Mr. Kwon, I will not blame you if you cannot find it in yourself to enter into this… marriage of convenience.”

There was a long silence.

It only occurred to Soonyoung much later that there were other things he should have carefully considered about the match- the possibility of gaining a fortune, a title, and lands, of going from a penniless second son to a Duke in one move. There were so many reasons to accept your proposal. None of the other gentlemen of the ton (least of all Mr, Kim and Mr. Lee) would believe Soonyoung when he said that none of those things had been on his mind at that moment.

Instead, he had only one thought on his mind.

You needed help. And while Soonyoung could not pretend that he fully understood you (there was still so much hidden behind that beautiful smile and deep eyes of yours), there was one thing that he was fairly confident about.

He wanted to be the one to help you.

“It would be an honour, Your Grace,” Soonyoung said slowly and carefully, “to be your husband.”

-----------------------------------------------------------

Soonyoung felt like he was in a dream as he exited your manor that afternoon with Viscount Hong. His mind and body seemed to be floating in the clouds, and it was difficult to concentrate on what the Viscount was saying to him.

“... cannot tell anybody about the engagement, yet, you understand, not until the Queen has granted her approval for the marriage. Perhaps in two days the announcement can be made in the papers. I assume the Duchess will handle making an appointment with the Queen, but-”

Soonyoung was suddenly and violently jerked out of his reverie.

“Sorry- did you just say the Queen?” he demanded.

Viscount Hong gestured for the carriage driver to begin and then turned back to his companion. “Yes, the Queen. The Duchess is one of the Queen’s ladies-in-waiting. She is part of her court. Naturally you will both need to approach the Queen for her blessing before you can announce the engagement publicly. You risk offending Her Majesty if you do not approach her before a public announcement.”

Soonyoung swallowed. He suddenly felt faint. “Yes, but surely the Duchess will handle that…”

“The Queen will naturally want to see you in order to grant you her blessing to the couple.”

“O-oh.”

Viscount Hong bit his lip as he looked at the startled young man sitting across from him in the carriage. He took a deep breath and sighed. “Soonyoung.”

“Yes?”

“Have you fully thought about this? Really thought about it? Being a Duke is not easy and there is an incredible amount of responsibility involved. The Duchess is entangled in the middle of a political tussle and I am sorry to say that she is on the weaker side. She needs someone who can be strong and support her through this ordeal. I know you are capable of doing so, I would not have recommended you otherwise. But I need you to step up to the task. The Duchess needs you to step up to the task.”

Soonyoung looked up at the Viscount sharply. There was a newfound determination in his eyes.

“I will do whatever is necessary,” he said firmly.

The Viscount relaxed. “Good. I will let you know once an appointment has been made to meet the Queen.”

—--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mr. Lee Seokmin was quite drunk.

“I cannot go to the navy alone!” he cried, his glass of whisky sloshing all over the expensive carpet. Fortunately for Seokmin, Mingyu was far too entertained by the scene before him to be concerned by the damage Seokmin was doing to his drawing room rug. “We were supposed to go together! We were going to capture pirates together, Soonyoung!”

Mr. Lee Jihoon raised an eyebrow at his younger brother. “It is quite unlikely that you would both have been stationed on the same ship.”

Seokmin paused. “We could have met at the naval base.”

“Yes, because the royal naval base is simply full of pirates ripe for your picking.”

Soonyoung was currently on his fourth glass of whisky and Kim Mingyu’s drawing room was beginning to appear hazy to his intoxicated gaze. The gentleman’s club was the preferred haunt for the group of bachelors gathered, but it was too public for the present celebration. Since the announcement would not be made in the papers for a few days, it was important to keep the news of Soonyoung’s engagement under wraps. They had gathered in Mingyu’s drawing room instead.

Jihoon, the most sober gentleman in the room by far, leaned closer to Soonyoung.

“Seokmin is merely inebriated,” Jihoon told him gently, misreading the worried expression on his friend’s face. “I hope you do not blame yourself for destroying his dreams of capturing pirates- my sister and I would never have consented to him joining the Navy in any case.”

Soonyoung blinked. “Oh.”

“Congratulations on your engagement, Soonyoung.”

“Thank you.”

Someone passed Soonyoung a cigar and he lifted it to his lips, taking a deep drag before leaning his head back against the armchair. He did not smoke often- he did not even drink often but the consequences and ramifications of the decision he had made earlier today were rapidly descending upon him. In order to distract himself from the sinking thought that he had perhaps made a rash decision that would impact the rest of his life and your life, he allowed Jihoon to refill his glass.

“I would like to raise a toast,” Mingyu announced loudly, rising to his feet and lifting his glass. “To Kwon Soonyoung, the man who refused to chase the dowry so the dowry came chasing him!”

Everyone chuckled. Soonyoung clumsily tossed back the whisky. He was beginning to feel nauseous.

“For heaven's sake, that painting is an eyesore,” Jihoon complained loudly as he gestured to one of the obnoxiously large paintings of a tastefully nude woman that Mingyu had displayed above the fireplace. “Is there nowhere else to hang that? What do you do when there are ladies present?”

Mingyu chuckled. “Do not fret, Mr. Lee, I will be shifting that painting to my art gallery once it is opened. As for the ladies, I entertain them in the breakfast parlour. It has paintings of kittens.”

Jihoon was still unimpressed. “I pity the women you court.”

“May I remind you that you are the one who cannot seem to stop staring at the painting?”

“You little-”

“I need some fresh air,” Soonyoung announced. He was barely audible over the sound of Mingyu and Jihoon debating the inappropriateness of nude paintings in a drawing room. Setting his glass down and finding his unsteady legs, Soonyoung walked towards one of the large balconies and stepped out into the night air. The cool summer breeze swept through his hair. He leaned against the railing for a few minutes- eyes closed, and thinking about the whirlwind of events that had led to him being engaged to a Duchess in a few days.

“Soonyoung?”

Seokmin had followed him onto the balcony. The younger Lee rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly as he joined Soonyoung near the balcony railing.

“Seokmin.”

“Jihoon thought I might be upsetting you by going on about the Navy. You know that I don’t actually resent you for backing out? I was merely joking. You’re about to be married, I couldn’t be happier for you,” Seokmin said honestly. He had a smile on his face. “You’re about to become a Duke.”

Soonyoung swallowed. “A Duke. Yes.”

“Why do you look worried?”

“Because I am worried,” Soonyoung confessed. His knuckles were white as he clasped the railing of the balcony and the words spilled out of his mouth rapidly. “The Viscount is right. I don’t have the faintest idea what the responsibilities of a Duke are. Having a title like that and a duchy is no joke, it is about politics; something I have no knowledge of. It is not merely my own life on the line. Everything I say and do will impact the Duchess. She is… she is not merely asking to marry me, she is trusting me with her property and family legacy and reputation. I-I don’t know if I am capable of this.”

Seokmin stared at his friend for a long moment.

“Soonyoung. You underestimate yourself.”

Soonyoung bit his lip, hard. “Do I?”

“Do you know what any other young man in your position would do?” Seokmin asked knowingly. “He would celebrate that some woman had handed him a fortune and a title on a golden platter. The fact that you are seriously considering the responsibilities involved with the dukedom proves that the Duchess was not wrong to choose you.”

“I don’t know why she chose me,” Soonyoung admitted with a sigh.

“Did you not ask her?”

“I should have asked, perhaps- it just… I did not get the opportunity and she called it a marriage of convenience, so clearly the answer cannot have been anything very flattering,” Soonyoung mumbled. He took a deep breath and looked up at the moonlight sky. “I wish I could celebrate with you, but all I can think of is how I am suddenly deeply terrified of disappointing the young lady that has misplaced her trust in me.”

“Soonyoung,” Seokmin said firmly. He placed a hand on his friend’s shoulder. “You are overthinking this.”

“Do you really think so?”

“You were prepared to go out into the open sea and fight pirates and enemy ships. I never once saw you show fear at the thought of joining the Navy. Why do you suddenly think you will not be able to handle the simple task of being a good husband?”

Soonyoung sighed. “I trained to be a sailor. I attended the Royal Naval Academy for years. Nobody has ever prepared me to be a Duke, Seokmin.”

“Then start preparing now. It is not too late.”

Soonyoung took a deep breath. Yes, Seokmin was right, He did not need to blindly blunder into this situation. He could prepare. He would prepare and would prove to you that you had not made a mistake by choosing him.

Kwon Soonyoung would learn to become a Duke.

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Soonyoung fidgeted in his brand new coat as he waited for your carriage to arrive. The coat was not uncomfortable in the least. On the contrary, it was perfectly tailored to fit Soonyoung, as opposed to the hastily mended hand-me-downs from his brother that he often wore. The Viscountess Hong was an angel; upon hearing of Soonyoung's engagement, she had promptly sent for a tailor to customise a new suit for Soonyoung to wear to his meeting with the Queen.

His meeting with the Queen.

A phrase that Soonyoung had never imagined he would say with any seriousness, and yet here he was. Standing near the entrance of the royal palace and waiting for the Duchess of Graham to meet him for a private audience with the Queen.

Your carriage approached and Soonyoung took a deep breath as he hurried forward. The footman was mildly surprised when Soonyoung stepped up to the carriage door himself and offered you a hand to help you descend.

You gave him one of your soft smiles and accepted his hand.

“Thank you, Mr. Kwon,” you told him. Your deep eyes glanced at him in an almost approving manner. “Is that a new suit? You look very handsome.”

Soonyoung could not prevent his ears from turning red at the compliment and he struggled with what to say in return. You looked radiant in a beautiful green dress that emphasised your glowing skin, and he opened his mouth to return the compliment… but nothing seemed sufficient to encapsulate how beautiful he thought you were. He waited too long; the moment passed.

“The Queen was pleased to grant us an audience even at such short notice,” you informed Soonyoung in a hushed tone as you both entered the royal palace and followed a pair of servants to the audience chambers. Soonyoung tried to focus on your words and not on the gentle pressure of your hand resting near the crook of his elbow. “I am sure she will be perfectly pleased to grant us her permission to marry, but I must warn you- Her Majesty is under the impression that this is a love match.”

Soonyoung cleared his throat nervously. “A love match?”

You blinked up at him apologetically. “I have already rejected offers from the sons of a few other Dukes that attempted to have my title revoked. The politics here are complicated; I found the easiest way to justify marrying someone outside of the commonly expected options, was to tell the Queen I was in love.”

“I see,” Soonyoung swallowed. “In love-yes, yes, I suppose we may say that.”

You seemed worried. “I apologise if this is sudden-”

“Not at all, Your Grace,” Soonyoung told you firmly. He took a deep breath and straightened his shoulders. This was his first test and he was not about to let himself be thrown by a small change in circumstances. He could handle this. He would not disappoint you. “It is not an issue at all. I will be sure to confirm the Queen’s understanding that this is a love match.”

You seemed relieved. “Thank you, Mr. Kwon.”

You both arrived at the audience chambers and waited in the hallway for a few moments until the Queen was ready to see you. Soonyoung’s heart was beating at an unnatural rate and he resisted the urge to fidget with his sleeves and cough. Your gloved hand resting lightly near his elbow somehow worked to keep him grounded. He focused on your gentle touch and kept his composure as the doors to the audience chamber opened and a guard came out.

“Her Highness has granted you an audience. Please enter.”

The Queen was seated at the head of the room. Soonyoung did not dare lift his head to look her in the eye. He did not even dare to look properly around the audience chamber for fear that the grandness and magnificence of the royal palace would cause him to lose composure. He simply allowed your gentle hand to guide him where he needed to go and followed you into a deep bow before the Queen.

“Ah, the Duchess of Graham,” the Queen greeted you loftily. “I must say that I was pleasantly surprised when you requested an audience, The word among the ton is that you have rejected so many eligible suitors that I had quite despaired of your ever marrying. I am relieved to see that is not the case.”

You responded quickly- your voice was soft and deferential. “Your Majesty. You have bestowed my family with the most precious gift of all by allowing my lineage to continue to hold the dukedom. We are forever indebted to you for your kindness and naturally, the decision of who should be the next Duke of Graham was not one that I could take lightly.”

This seemed to please the Queen.

“And you have finally made your choice? Mr. Kwon, I hear?”

Soonyoung bowed his head. "Yes, your Majesty."

The Queen observed him slowly and critically. "You are a handsome young man; I can certainly see why the Duchess prefers you. But the question remains- can you be a Duke?"

Soonyoung swallowed. "I will do my best, your Majesty."

The Queen huffed. "I suppose that is all one can ask for, really- my dear Duchess, have you quite set your heart on this man?"

You bowed. "Yes, Your Majesty."

"Then far be it from me to stand in the way of your love. You have my blessing. You may marry- and Mr. Kwon may be granted the title of a Duke," the Queen said dismissively.

"Thank you, Your Majesty-"

"Yes, yes. Be on your way and prepare for your wedding. And my dear Duchess- now that you shall have a husband to handle the matters of your estate, I expect you to attend to the royal court far more often. You will need to join me and the other court ladies for tea at least once a fortnight."

"Of course, Your Majesty."

Your grasp on Soonyoung's arm relaxed noticeably and Soonyoung was relieved when you began to leave the room and he could follow you. The moment you both left the audience chambers, he released the breath he had been holding and looked up at you with a sheepish smile.

"That was… not as difficult as I expected," he admitted with a grin.

You smiled back at him softly. "Did you think it was going to be difficult? I did tell you that Her Majesty would be pleased to grant her permission."

Soonyoung flushed. "Yes, but- I mean… I have never met the Queen, so…"

"Of course. I can understand. I thought, perhaps we should discuss, before we part… when we might have the wedding?" you began. There was a sudden shyness in your gaze that Soonyoung was surprised to note.

He blinked. "Whenever you see fit, Your Grace."

"Our engagement will be announced in the papers tomorrow," you told him as you both walked back to your carriage. "Since we have the Queen's permission to marry, I do not believe a lengthy betrothal is necessary. Unless you had any objection- perhaps next Monday?"

Soonyoung froze in his path. "For the wedding?"

You noticed his hesitancy. "Was there any reason you wished to wait longer?"

Soonyoung opened his mouth to speak. It was all happening so quickly. He almost wanted more time to prepare, to comprehend the life he was getting into. But he saw the anxiety in your eyes. You wanted to be married soon and he could understand- the pressures you were facing were not light.

It was not the time for Soonyoung to be selfish.

"No. No, next Monday is perfect, Your Grace," Soonyoung said quickly. Your carriage was waiting outside the palace and your footman rushed to open the door for you.

"Then I will have the arrangements made," you told him gently.

"E-excellent."

Soonyoung held out his hand to help you into the carriage but he was interrupted by your butler, who suddenly approached with an armful of books. "Mr. Kwon!" the butler greeted him politely. "I had these brought over from the Graham library, as per your request. Was this what you were looking for?"

You paused and frowned at the books. "What are these?"

Soonyoung's ears turned pink. He had expected the butler to give them to him privately- not in front of you. He took the books and smiled at you awkwardly.

"I-I realised that I knew very little about the Graham duchy so I asked your butler if he could find some books that would teach me about your family lineage and the history of your lands," Soonyoung admitted shyly. He noticed the shock in your deep eyes which slowly melted into something much, much softer and affectionate as your eyes dropped to the heavy genealogy book at the top of the pile.

"Mr. Kwon…" you said softly. "You really don't need to do that."

Soonyoung cleared his throat. "I would like to."

You stared at him for a long moment. Soonyoung felt almost exposed under your lingering gaze. He could not read what was behind your piercing eyes and he was about to apologise for overstepping when you finally spoke again, a small but noticeable crack in your voice.

“Thank you,” you said quietly. “We will see each other soon, Mr. Kwon.”

“Of course. Goodbye, Your Grace.”

—---------------------------------------------------------

The week before the wedding went by in a flash. The announcement of the Duchess of Graham's engagement in the papers had predictably thrown the entire ton into an uproar. Kwon Soonyoung went from being an obscure, little-known gentleman to the name on everyone's lips in the span of a single morning.

He was overwhelmed with invitations; to tea at the Baron's house, to dine with the Carter family and many more. It seemed that every single noble family suddenly wished to make Soonyoung's acquaintance and pretend that they had been very familiar with him all along. Soonyoung honestly thought that he may have gone mad if it had not been for Seokmin and Mingyu by his side.

"This happened to my family as soon as my sister's engagement to the Viscount was published in the papers," Seokmin said as he rifled through the invitations. "The entire month was spent having dinner with different families."

Soonyoung's head was buried in a weighty tome about the genealogy of the Graham dukedom and he looked up with a sigh. "I barely have time with wedding preparations to attend half of these invitations. Not to mention the reading I hoped to do. What should I do?"

Mingyu, sitting in the corner of the room with a pipe in his mouth, chuckled. "Ignore them."

Soonyoung frowned. "What if some of them are from important families of the ton, they may take offence-"

Mingyu laughed as he took the stack of invitations from Seokmin's hands and smoothly tore them in half. "Important families? Oh my poor dear Soonyoung. I am not sure you understand what is happening to you. You are about to be a Duke. You are now the important family that everyone fears offending. You don’t need to worry about them!"

Soonyoung blinked. "Was it necessary to tear them?"

"I would tear that book in your hands as well, if I thought I could manage it. What are you doing, Mr. Kwon? These are your last few days as a bachelor- are you really going to spend them reading? Something you never even did in your short time at Oxford?"

Soonyoung bit his lip. "This book is rather dry."

"That's the spirit-"

"Do you have any books on agriculture I might borrow? The duchy consists largely of agricultural land and I was hoping to understand more about how the agrarian community pays its taxes."

Mingyu looked aghast.

"None of that. Stop that immediately and come have a drink."

While it was difficult to get the notorious rake to discuss anything seriously, Soonyoung did manage to extract some advice from Mingyu on managing an estate once he was sufficiently drunk, and Seokmin was a welcome presence that served to keep Soonyoung's spirits high.

The day of the wedding finally arrived. It was a smaller celebration than customary for a Duke's wedding and there were many members of the ton that openly lamented not receiving an invitation. Despite the short guest list, Soonyoung was still anxious as he stood up at the altar and stared at the sea of people watching from the pews.

"I still don't understand how you seduced the Duchess," Soonyoung's elder brother grumbled from behind him as he adjusted his cuffs. It had taken no small effort to keep the elder Kwon sober and presentable for the wedding; Soonyoung would forever owe Jihoon a debt of gratitude for undertaking that unpleasant responsibility and executing it without complaint.

But he did not have the opportunity to respond to his brother. You suddenly appeared at the end of the aisle and Soonyoung felt as though the entire room had fallen away and you were the only person standing before him.

You looked exquisite, in a simple white dress and with a gentle smile on your face. Soonyoung watched, almost in a trance, as you walked gracefully down the aisle in a slow, practised gait. You looked divine and Soonyoung was suddenly reminded of how in over his head he felt, how he was marrying a woman so far, far above his station that this had to be some sort of a dream or joke, it could not possibly be real that you were about to become his wife.

You reached the altar and looked up at him quietly through your eyelashes with a small smile.

Soonyoung's heart pounded as you both turned to face the minister. The man read out some pre-written drivel about holy matrimony and Soonyoung tried to concentrate but all he could focus on was the sound of your soft breathing beside him and his own pounding heartbeat. He barely remembered saying his own vows.

"Mr. Kwon," you said softly. "The ring."

Your voice snapped Soonyoung out of his reverie. Somebody was presenting him with a ring and he swallowed nervously before reaching for it. It was a delicate little thing; Soonyoung fumbled with the ring for a moment, but to his relief it did not fall from his grasp. He reached for your hand- your soft, gentle hand- and placed the ring on your finger.

It was done.

You were married.

The rest of the morning felt like a blur. Soonyoung received congratulations from dozens of people he had never met in his entire life. He found himself thrown from conversation to conversation like a child's ball until finally your hand on his elbow tightened and you whispered softly in his ear.

"Our carriage is waiting outside," you said. "We can leave."

"Yes, let's."

It was a number of goodbyes before Soonyoung could finally reach the carriage and help you inside. Soonyoung climbed in as well and once the door was closed behind him, he took a deep breath and looked across the carriage at you.

"I think that went rather well, Your Grace," he said to you lightly.

You smiled back at him. "I thought having fewer guests would make the ceremony quicker but I am afraid we were still detained much longer than expected. Would you object if we went directly to the estate for the night? It is not very far- a few hours' ride."

Soonyoung nodded. "Of course."

—----------------------------------------------------------

You fell asleep during the carriage ride to the Graham estate. Soonyoung was torn between watching the magnificent views of the countryside and the sight of your head drowsily leaning against the carriage wall as you tried to fight sleep. Soonyoung couldn't help but smile at the sight of your eyelashes repeatedly fluttering closed and then fluttering back open in protest.

It appeared even the Duchess of Graham got sleepy during carriage rides.

It was late evening when you both arrived at the Graham estate and although Soonyoung was now much more prepared than before, he was still struck with awe at the sheer size and grandeur of the estate. There were vast gardens at the entrance and the manor itself loomed over the carriage. He could hear the sound of a creek nearby.

"Welcome to the Graham manor, Your Grace," you told him.

Soonyoung descended the carriage slowly, taking it all in. Was this to be his home? Was he really going to live here? Did all this really belong to him now?

"I am afraid we don't have enough time for a tour of the estate this evening," you told him as the servants hurried to open the front doors for you. "I sent word ahead to have supper ready. Perhaps tomorrow, I can show you around the manor and the gardens?"

Soonyoung swallowed and nodded silently.

"Shall we dine?"

"Y-yes."

The dining room was magnificent and there was a lavish spread for supper. Soonyoung decided that he was too far gone to exhibit any shame; he had not eaten all day due to the anxiety from the wedding, and was in no position to refuse the delicacies served at the table. Even the knowledge that you were watching him eat quietly with a small smile on your face did not deter him from filling his cheeks with food.

"Mr. Jones, will you show the Duke upstairs?" you asked once supper had been cleared away. Soonyoung was surprised when one of the butlers quickly ushered him upstairs through various lengthy hallways and foyers to an enormous bedchamber before he could ask any further questions.

A warm bath had been prepared for him in an adjoining bathroom and Soonyoung was surprised to see that all his belongings had already been brought and neatly unpacked in the bedchamber. He undressed and relaxed in the bath for a few moments before the fog from the excellent supper cleared from his mind and he remembered.

This was his wedding night.

You would have to consummate the marriage.

Soonyoung jerked upright and the water sloshed out of the side of his bath. He finished the bath quickly and dressed in a fresh night-suit that had been placed on the bed for him. Then he paced the room and regretted not asking someone about this sooner.

How did this work? Would you come to him? Did he go to you- but no, the manor was enormous and he did not have the slightest idea where you had gone after dinner. He could not wander the hallways searching for your. Should he ask a servant? The sheer mortification from the thought of doing so made Soonyoung shiver.

Would you even want to consummate the marriage? You had said in your own words that this was a marriage of convenience and not a love match. But even marriages of convenience were consummated! You had mentioned carrying on the lineage and to have children it would be necessary to consummate, so surely it would be done?

But perhaps you did not intend to do it tonight. You had fallen asleep in the carriage and you were probably tired from the journey. Perhaps the assumption was that you would consummate at a later time?

There was a soft knock on the door to the bedchamber.

"Come in!" Soonyoung called.

You peeked your head around the door and Soonyoung jumped to his feet. "Your Grace!"he greeted you.

"May I come in?"

"O-of course!"

You entered the bedchamber slowly; you were wearing a soft satin nightgown that revealed your silhouette and Soonyoung felt his blood rush to all the wrong places. Your cheeks were flushed and you were biting your soft lips nervously.

Soonyoung took a deep breath.

Well. It appeared that this would be happening tonight after all.

"I thought- we never got a chance to taste our own wedding cake, so I had them bring a few slices back for us," you explained softly. Soonyoung noticed that there was a covered tray in your hands. He rushed forward to take it from you, and placed it on the bedside table.

"Our wedding cake?" Soonyoung repeated anxiously.

You nodded and lifted the cover off the tray. There were two small slices of a pink strawberry cake covered in white frosting on the tray, as well as a bottle of wine and a pair of wine glasses. Soonyoung stared at the tray and then looked back at you.

"Oh," he said. "Cake. I see."

"The wine was a gift from Viscountess Hong," you continued to explain. Your voice was growing quieter, and Soonyoung noticed that you looked rather flushed. "She thought it might.. help. I must admit that I already had a glass earlier. But perhaps we could share another one?"

That explained why you looked flushed and the way your deep eyes boldly darted up to his and then turned away shyly. Soonyoung took a deep breath to calm himself and sat on the bed.

"Wine and cake," Soonyoung said with a smile. "Two of my favourite things."

"I thought you would regret missing the wedding cake. It's strawberry- made from fresh berries from the strawberry fields on the estate and the cook says she improved the recipe since the ball," you said. You were speaking more quickly than you normally did and Soonyoung noticed the slight tremble in your hand as you poured out two glasses of wine.

"Have you already tasted the cake as well?"

You shook your head.

Soonyoung was not sure where his sudden burst of confidence came from. He certainly never imagined that he would ever have the strength to make a move on any woman, much less a Duchess. But you were nervous. He could see it in your anxious eyes, in the soft lips that you kept biting, and the way your hands trembled slightly as you grasped your wine glass.

He took a small piece of cake on the spoon and held it out to you.

"Taste it first."

You stared at him for a long moment before leaning forward and taking the bite that he offered. You swallowed it and nodded.

"I think it's rather well made," you said softly.

Soonyoung chuckled- he had no doubt that it was well-made, it even smelled delicious. He took a huge bite out of the cake and delighted in the sweet strawberry taste that exploded in his mouth.

"That," he said firmly, "is the most delicious strawberry cake I have ever tasted."

You giggled. "Soonyoung, the cream is all over your face. Here…"

You leaned closer to him and used a napkin to wipe away the cream that had stuck to the corner of his lips. Soonyoung was suddenly flooded with your scent; the familiar fragrance of lilacs and an intoxicating scent that was you, so uniquely you. His dark eyes darted up and met your heavy, lidded gaze.

You kissed him first.

It was not a surprise- Soonyoung had been leaning forward but your lips found him much sooner than he expected, and he had to grasp the edge of the bed to steady himself. You were clumsy in your movements- perhaps it was the wine- and Soonyoung soon found himself wrapping his arms around you to steady you both in a deep, passionate kiss. Soonyoung's fingers grasped fistfuls of your satin nightgown and pulled you closer to him.

You gasped when his lips met your neck. Soonyoung was gentle but his touch was firm and your warm bodies melted together as you both explored each other with your hands and lips. Your hands grasped fistfuls of Soonyoung's dark hair, and you let out a squeal when Soonyoung grasped your waist tightly and turned so that you were lying underneath him on the bed.

He looked down at you for a moment. Your hair splayed out on the pillow and your lidded eyes looked up at him nervously. He could see the excitement and the anticipation, but also a hint of fear in your eyes.

"Soonyoung…" you whispered his name hesitantly. "I… I've never…."

Soonyoung decided that he would never give you a reason to look at him with fear again. He leaned down and pressed a soft, gentle kiss to your lips and waited until he felt you relax against his lips.

"Tell me if it hurts," he whispered gently, "and we can stop."

You looked up at him and nodded.

"A-allright."

—-------------------------------------------------------

#seventeen scenarios #hoshi scenarios #seventeen fluff #hoshi x reader #soonyoung x reader #soonyoung fluff #soonyoung scenarios #seventeen x reader #seventeen imagines #regency!au #seventeen fanfiction

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kayleefriedchicken · 3 months

Text

This delusional user wants to read fluffy fanfics but is nowhere near good enough to write her own. Sigh.

So if anybody comes across this ask, can you please tag me if you are kind enough to write the following SKZ plots?

1) BTS x SKZ crossover with you as the main character. One of them is your best friend, the other is your brother, and the others are the supporting cast. Go with the flow, as you wish.

2) You are gorgeous, intelligent, and the light in everyone's life. Except that you were brought up with the idea that curvy can never be pretty (toxic family 'ideals' and the likes), so your self-confidence is all pretence because you never give yourself enough credit. You grow up in the shadow of your perfect baby brother (one of the SKZ members, of course), the only one who believes in you, is immensely proud of you and whom you love to the ends of the earth despite the toxic environment you two were brought up in. Said baby brother just wants you to heal, to love and be loved, and to have faith in yourself. Enter, [insert SKZ member - haven't decided whom yet, TBH] and a fluffy, angsty, heartwarming love story ensues.

3) I've always loved the idea of an overprotective younger brother who just wants his beloved sister to be happy and loved (I'm an only child, can you tell?), to stop being that stereotypical selfless noona who sacrifices her happiness for him just so he can be a success story. Maybe her happiness ends up being one of his members, and who cares if he's younger? It'd be an interesting direction, this oneshot or series.

4) What would SKZ be as an overprotective baby brother to his naive older sister?

5) SKZ being overprotective brothers of a member's noona, who's always looking out for them and whom they love like she's their own. The main plot being said noona's abusive ex-boyfriend harassing after he had the audacity to cheat on her. It can be a romance trope or just a platonic story, but I'd love for it to be SKZ as SKZ without it being an alternate universe (although an A/U might also work if the storyline is in that direction).

6) Been listening to 'Wow' by 3Racha on repeat and imagining the Noona they refer to is Y/N. Imagine this, you're the new manager that JYP had decided to add on to SKZ's entourage but SKZ don't know it yet. The boys saw you one morning at the nearby cafe and many mornings thereafter, just before you were officially onboarded. There was something about you that caught their attention that Han came up with this song about. Oooh, just imagine the chaos when you're finally introduced to them?! It'd be such a juicy story to read!

7) Am I the only one who's thinking of the backstory of Silent Cry? It's such a beautiful song and I've thought of some that will make a great fiction. My favourite is the one where, in an alternative idol world, you are Han's elder cousin whose family took you in after your parents' death - you're successful in your corporate job, beautiful, curvy and married to your childhood sweetheart; it seemed like you have everything on the surface. But you hide a secret, even from your doting cousin (who's like a baby brother to you) and his members (who love you like their own sister) - your husband is a manipulative, abusive man who had successfully hidden his dark side until a year into your marriage. Your once-natural confidence and bubbly self is now a facade, stripped away as soon as you're home alone; a facade so good, even Han never suspected until the boys dropped by unannounced at your hotel room while you're on a business trip, with the intention of surprising you for your birthday. You were sporting a fading black eye and bruises to your arm, which you tried to hide behind tinted glasses and a bathrobe you'd hastily pulled over your sleeveless top. The events that happened after - Han and the rest of SKZ finding out then working hard to bring you to your senses (in the midst of it, the song Silent Cry was born), finally peeling off society's toxic mindset and stigma of divorce, and liberating you from 2 years of hell. I've had variations where this is a platonic trope, a romantic one with one of the members, or even something in-between that is suggestive of a possible romance between you and one of SKZ. I would be so in-love with this series, I think I'll keep reading and re-reading this; I'm a sucker for sibling love (only child problems) and rescue stories involving a victim who'd usually be so strong (because it shows that anyone can be a victim, so we shouldn't be so complacent of those around us). Anyone willing to take this on?

8) On the way back to your car after a particularly gruelling night shift, you come across a horribly injured man in the back alley. You're a doctor with a strong belief in helping people in need, no matter who they are, and an equally strong belief in doctor-patient confidentiality. Which works well for the injured man because, unbeknownst to you, he's a member of a deadly underground group - the SKZs. He refused help at the hospital you work in, nor at any other hospital, so you made the decision to bring him home to treat his injuries. He's gone 24 hours later with a cryptic'I owe you my life, thank you' note, and that was the end of it. Or so you thought. Since then however, your very normal - very repititive - life has been a series of interesting incidents, including making the acquaintance of your mysterious new neighbour who, for some reason, seems familiar to you.

9) Your younger brother is one of the members of SKZ, and you get along fabulously with him and his group. He may be younger than you but, having lost your parents as teenagers, he has taken it upon himself to be your protector - sometimes even shadowing you on your dates without your knowledge (at the protest of his members because they felt it was a little too much - "Let your sister have some breathing space, for goodness sake, she's not a child!"). You sing really well but have never been interested in the music industry, finding passion in the law and are a successful lawyer. You have been featured in some SKZ and 2PM songs though, the uncredited female voice in some of their popular songs (let's pretend there are such songs). One day, you're pushed to the limelight after the firm you work in successfully saved an orphanage from losing its home (which was donated to them by an anonymous millionaire). You were, of course, the lead lawyer in that case. With that case being in the news constantly, your connection to the music industry (i.e. your brother) and singing talents are revealed. Fellow writers, take this forward however you see fit.

#SKZ #stray kids #SKZ x reader #stray kids x reader #SKZ imagine #stray kids imagine #SKZ x Noona #stray kids x noona #SKZ x you #stray kids x you

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callsign-rogueone · 1 month

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Ok I'm sure I'm probably the only one to think this but I just got caught up on one of our favorite couples Brennan and duchess. And each time I read one of your fics about them and espically when xaden makes an appearance I can't help but wonder if xad and duchess are cousin or related somehow. And a they either now it or hide it and b they don't know at all. But I could also just be thinking completely of the rails here.

oh thats interesting. I hadn’t even considered them being biological family. they could be distantly related in the way that most royals are, but they’re pretty much brother and sister by now anyway:

he’s dating her husband’s sister

her parents fostered him and Liam after the war

and all the marked ones are like younger siblings to her, she cares for them deeply and helped prepare them for Basgiath before they left.

but before all that, they were not quite childhood friends (5-6 year age difference + they didn’t see each other much), but more like how you are with your parents friends kids: always dumped together at the kids table at gatherings, and probably not super close, but still friendly because you’re the only people here who aren’t old enough to drink and this is so boring, wanna go play uno or something?

I can imagine Bren freaking out after they surrender to the rebellion, like he still can’t believe she’s on a first-name basis with Fen Riorson’s kid, and she just laughs like; he doesn’t scare me. I used to babysit him and his cousin. they were cute kids :)

I like to think she had a large role in getting the other royals / surviving Tyrrish to foster the marked ones, and taking care of them in the meantime until they could get settled with a more permanent family.

Brennan was involved too, of course, because he stands by his woman, and he’s an older sibling / the caring type by nature, but also in Iron Flame he says he can’t mend magic or relics — meaning he tried to get rid of their marks but couldn’t 🥺

her love for them was another confirmation for Bren that this was the person he wanted to spend the rest of his life with; despite her being an only child, she cares for the marked ones just as fiercely as he does for his own sisters.

that got out of hand lol sorry. I just love them sm 🥰

#liz.txt #answered #Brennan and Duchess

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starspray · 4 months

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Sunwarmed

My @whiteoliphaunt fic, for @gwaedhannen--I hope you like it!

Rating: G Characters: Finrod/Amarie Summary:

The more he thought about it the more he realized he was not quite missing the Tirion of his childhood, but Nargothrond at its height. His own city, that he’d planned and helped to build with his own two hands, where his friends among the dwarves had visited so often, and where he had earned his favorite epessë. No one in Valinor called him Felagund.

Also on AO3

It was very quiet in Tirion. The War of Wrath was ended and the armies returned, alongside many others, but still: most who had departed Tirion when darkness fell had not returned. Many now slept in Mandos; many more had refused the Valar ’s call and remained in Middle-earth with its wide open lands now filled with opportunity and possibility and and safety.

Finrod would have been lying if he said he did not envy them.

He sat atop the roof of the palace, looking out over the city. It was a spot he and his cousins had often retreated to when they were young—and even when they were grown, and the tension below grew too much. These tiles, or perhaps their predecessors, had borne witness to many afternoons of long and winding conversation, of tears and of laughter, hopes and dreams and teasing. Now there was no one to talk to; his cousins and brothers were all dead, and his sister had refused to come home. Finrod was not surprised, and he hoped that Galadriel found everything she wanted and more in Middle-earth—but he still missed her. It was lonely, being the only one left in Tirion.

Finrod sighed, and stretched out his legs, leaning back against the sun warmed stones of the wall. He missed too the bustle and noise of a full and thriving city—though the more he thought about it the more he realized he was not quite missing the Tirion of his childhood, but Nargothrond at its height. His own city, that he ’d planned and helped to build with his own two hands, where his friends among the dwarves had visited so often, and where he had earned his favorite epessë. No one in Valinor called him Felagund.

As he contemplated the horizon, both familiar and strange, the soft rustle of skirts heralded an unexpected companion. He turned and found, to his surprise, Amari ë emerging from the window—or trying to. The current fashions in Tirion ran to rather wide skirts, and she was having a bit of difficulty getting her layers of petticoats through the opening. “Thank you!” she said when he held out his hands to help her. “I thought I might find you up here.”

“Who else knows of this spot?” Finrod asked, amused. “I rather thought it was a secret between all my cousins.”

“Artanis told me about it once,” Amarië said breezily. “Very long ago, before all the troubles began.” She smoothed her deep green skirts as she settled on the tiles beside him, as though she had brought a small grassy hill up to the roof with her to serve as a cushion.

“She prefers Galadriel, these days,” Finrod said. “That is the name her husband gave her.”

Amari ë smiled, but there was a strange, almost wistful look in her eyes. “It is hard to imagine her married,” she said. “I never thought there was anyone in the world who could keep up with her.”

“Celeborn certainly can.”

They sat for a while in silence, looking out over the rolling green hills to the south, and the road snaking through the Calacirya in the east toward Alqualond ë and the glittering blue Sea. “What name do you prefer, these days?” Amarië asked suddenly. Finrod looked at her in surprise. “So many Exiles are returning with new names, but I cannot remember being told yours.”

He hesitated a moment before answering. “Finrod is the name I gave myself,” he said finally, “when we were rendering all our names into Sindarin. I had others, over the years…” Nóm was in many ways dearest to his heart, but it had no place in Aman. “Felagund, I was called. From Felakgundu, in the Dwarvish tongue. I had many friends among the Dwarves—they helped to delve and build my city Nargothrond. ”

“I have heard that name,” said Amarië, troubled. “In the songs they sing on Tol Eressëa. King Felagund who battled the Enemy’s lieutenant beneath his haunted tower.”

“Not his tower, but mine, stolen and overrun after the Bragollach,” said Finrod. “And, after, it was my tomb.” He smiled at Amarië, though she looked both shocked and horrified. “It’s all right! I won’t faint away to think or talk about my own death. And anyway, Sauron got his due. Lúthien came and sang the tower town to rubble. Better to have it so than for it to be of any use to the Enemy.”

“And now it is drowned, with all the rest of that land,” said Amarië softly.

Finrod sighed, letting his smile fade away. “Yes. With Nargothrond and Gondolin and Menegroth the magnificent…but there is much still of Middle-earth left, and new kingdoms are rising even as we speak.”

“Yes, and your sister will finally find herself a queen of some glorious realm,” Amarië said.

“Perhaps,” said Finrod.

“And what will you do, now that you are here again?” Amarië asked.

“I don’t know. I have been a king and a hero, and I don’t think I would like to be either one again.”

Silence fell between them again. Then Amari ë reached over and took Finrod’s hand in her own. The sunshine glinted on her golden hair and the golden beads woven into her braids, making her sparkle. “You have never been a husband,” she said, “though once I know you wished it.”

Finrod turned his hand to lace their fingers together. “Would you still have me, Amarië, after all this time?” he asked.

Her smile was lovelier in his eyes than all the jewels of Nargothrond and more wondrous than the greatest wonders of Middle-earth. “I would.”

#wo2023 #look i wrote a thing #silmarillion #finrod #amarie #finrod/amarie

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loosingmoreletters · 1 year

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Title: a decade more to breathe Summary: In which Wei Wuxian is ten years older.

Age 5

Jiang Fengmian looks at the weeping child in his bed and he has no idea how to console the boy. Wei Ying is old enough to understand his parents, Jiang Fengmian’s best friends, won’t return, and every attempt at leaving the boy has him breaking out in tears again.

He refuses to make him cry again when he’s all Jiang Fengmian has left.

Age 6

When Yu Ziyuan marries into Yunmeng Jiang, her husband already has a son and heir. Jiang Ying is nearly seven years old, and Yu Ziyuan cannot tell if she’d prefer the boy to be her husband’s bastard instead of this odd thing he loves.

The boy’s actual parents, her husband’s childhood servant and an immortal’s disciple, died on a nighthunt when the child was five. Outside of Yunmeng, there are plenty of rumors about why the Sect Leader was so quick to adopt the servant’s child, but at Lotus Pier, people are affronted at the suggestion he wouldn’t.

She loathes the boy as she does this marriage. Jiang Fengmian is not the spouse she would’ve picked for herself, even if the position of a great sect’s madam is. She sends the boy out when she can and finds that her husband goes with him, dotes on the adopted child as if it were his own.

He doesn’t know the difference yet, Yu Ziyuan thinks, between loving a stranger’s child and your own. Having their own children will teach him, she thinks.

Age 7

Jiang Ying loves his new baby sister. She’s cute and round and the best thing he’s ever seen in his entire life.

Not that Madam Yu allows him to hold her, but his father does. He makes Jiang Ying sit down in his lap first and Jiang Ying shuffles until he is comfortable before being given his new baby sister as a prize.

“You have to be very careful, a-Ying,” his father says. “She is very small and delicate.”

Jiang Ying pulls a face at that. He isn’t stupid, he can see that a-Li is very small and precious and he’ll protect her forever. She is his only baby sister, after all. Round and squishy like this, he almost imagines that she looks a little like him. She doesn’t because Jiang Fengmian is her father in a way he isn’t his, but he likes to dream for a moment.

He has a painting of his parents in his room, commissioned when he was even younger and wouldn’t stop crying when they went on a nighthunt. Maybe, if they hadn’t died, Jiang Ying would already have a baby sister.

Or maybe he’d only have Jiang Yanli and still love her most.

Age 10

For his tenth birthday, Jiang Ying gets a courtesy name and a baby brother.

Well, not exactly. He gets a courtesy name first and five days later he gets a baby brother, but he guesses it’s about the same thing.

Madam Yu doesn’t protest against him holding a-Cheng, but he supposes that is because his father has been giving him a-Li to hold for three years now. At seven, Jiang Wuxian hadn’t understood why Madam Yu, at best, settles on ignoring him. At ten, holding his brother, he does.

“Is a-Cheng going to be sect heir now?” Jiang Wuxian asks his father.

His siblings are with their nanny, a strict woman hired by Madam Yu, who sends Jiang Wuxian on many errands to keep him away from the two youngest. He wouldn’t mind so much if Madam Yu at least wouldn’t train him until he collapses every day and his time with his siblings is his only break.

Jiang Fengmian frowns. “You are my son, a-Ying.”

“But not by blood,” Jiang Wuxian replies.

He’s not mad about it. Jiang Fengmian could have let him remain an orphaned disciple or taken him in as a ward. There was no need to adopt him, but his father had done so regardless. And for those two years, their family had only been them and those odd dozen elder cousins doting on him. Life had been very kind.

“I wouldn’t mind,” Jiang Wuxian says. “A-Cheng will be a good sect leader.”

Right now, all a-Cheng is really good at is throwing up, but he never hits Jiang Wuxian’s clarity bell, so he’s already very filial.

“I have no doubt he would be,” Jiang Fengmian replies. It’s not a real answer, not that Jiang Wuxian knows that at the time. He sits down on his father’s desk instead and asks questions about nighthunts. He’s too young to go, but it won’t be for much longer.

Age 15

He’s the only boy of his standing at the Lan’s lectures and it shows by how utterly bored Jiang Wuxian is at the end of the first week. He’s not been announced sect heir, but the title also hasn’t been given to his brother, although both are getting the same education.

Well, a-Cheng is learning how to write and Jiang Wuxian is examining old treaties and driving his teachers insane, asking questions that have very little to do with the curriculum and are probably more specialized than they expected to deal with.

He’d hoped to talk to Lan Qiren. The man apparently knew his parents and is one of his generation’s best scholars. He’s also absent, caring for his nephews.

Jiang Wuxian doesn’t find him when he goes exploring the Cloud Recesses, but he does find a boy about a-Cheng’s age, looking like he might start crying any second.

It takes Jiang Wuxian approximately less than a second to kneel down in front of the kid and distract him with the glowing bunny talisman he makes for his siblings.

Lan Qiren will never quite forgive him for this.

Age 23

“Ying-ge, Ying-ge!”

Jiang Wuxian pauses halfway through the house as his little brother barrels into him. “Ying-ge, you’re back!”

“I am,” he replies and, as though his back isn’t killing him at the moment, he picks Jiang Cheng up. “How has my didi been?”

“Put me down!” Jiang Cheng shrieks. “You can’t pick me up. I went on my first nighthunt, I’m not a baby anymore!”

He’s all huffy, but Jiang Wuxian knows his brother’s hurt when he sees it. Ah, his first nighthunt already. He’d promised that he would be there and lead him on it. Jiang Cheng probably threw a tantrum about it, and knowing Madam Yu, she reacted just as harshly.

“You will have to tell me everything once I’m done talking with father,” Jiang Wuxian says and puts his brother down.

“But—”

“A-Cheng, please.”

“It’s Wanyin,” his brother insists, but still comes back for a hug before rushing off. For all that spots are turning Jiang Cheng into a teenage monster, he is still adorably clingy.

On his way to Jiang Fengmian’s office, he passes a few servants, greets them all by name, before facing his father.

“A-Ying,” Jiang Fengmian greets him all the same after all these years. “How have you been?”

“Well!” Jiang Wuxian replies and waits until his father dismisses the disciple in the office and activates a silencing talisman.

“So?” Jiang Fengmian prompts.

Jiang Wuxian instantly drops his cheerful demeanor. “Sect Leader Wen definitely killed Sect Leader Nie. Nie-xiong definitely knows as well. We talked for a bit, and while he’d definitely out for blood, I think he’s also right to believe Wen Ruohan won’t stop now that he’s gotten away with that.”

“What do you think we should do?”

Jiang Wuxian hesitates, then he slowly launches into his elaboration. He’s taken to wandering in the past years, not just to spread the reputation of his sect or take on dangerous nighthunts, but also because he likes discovering new places, sitting in a bar dressed like anything but a sect leader’s son and listening to foreign gossip.

Turns out he’s quite good at talking to people.

Age 26

Surrounded by disciples and heirs much younger than him, Jiang Wuxian feels truly old for the first time. He wonders if Nie-xiong feels the same, already serving as sect leader, or if the experience is unique to Jiang Wuxian alone.

He’s been seeing signs of war for years, but he hadn’t expected the Wen to be this daring.

“We’ll figure something out,” he tells his brother. “It’ll be alright.”

It tastes like a lie.

Age 27

Jiang Wanyin is all grown up and Jiang Wuxian wasn’t there to see it.

“What do you mean I will be sect leader?” Jiang Cheng hisses. “I can’t be sect leader!”

“Why not? You were trained to be, found all our disciples after the attack, and organized every move for the last three months.”

“Because you were gone!” Jiang Cheng shouts, his voice breaking at the last word. “You weren’t there. I thought—you were supposed to—”

Like a thousand times before, Jiang Wuxian opens his arms and lets his brother cry in them. The bride ghost lingering in the corner tells him not to scare as their sister enters the tent and starts crying the moment she sees them. They pull her close too and Jiang Wuxian apologizes until his throat is dry and whispers a hundred more reassurances.

“But why?” Jiang Cheng asks again once he no longer hiccups. “Is it what happened to you? Your golden core— You said you were rescued by a masked man.”

Jiang Wuxian’s smile falters. “Yes, about that…”

Age 29

Lan Wangji is the only person outside the clan who knows Jiang Wuxian is not the coreless administrator he’s pretending to be.

Well, it’s not so much pretending as that Jiang Wuxian is coreless and has been shuffled into a primarily administrative position, but he’s also trying very hard to get his new Burial Mounds granted fucked up cultivation under control. It’s enough to use as a weapon of war hiding beneath a mask, but it is not very lowkey.

Lan Wangji hadn’t even been supposed to find out, but after that one terrible week stuck in a cave together and witnessing Jiang Wuxian fucking around with a sword full of resentment, he’s a bit attuned to the sensation.

They have to make him marry in, somehow. Having Lan Wangji, a Lan who notoriously doesn’t lie, know about the Jiang’s little scheme is far from ideal.

But that is not Jiang Wuxian’s quest right now. “Lan Wangji,” he says instead. “Does your brother have any particular demands?”

Lan Wangji blinks at him.

“Spoils of war,” Jiang Wuxian elaborates. “Anything your clan wants? Land, people, money?”

“I believe anything of monetary value might be a priority,” Lan Wangji says slowly. “Cloud Recesses is still in need of rebuilding.”

“Great,” Jiang Wuxian says quickly before cringing at his wording. He is, perhaps, running on too little sleep. The job had seemed much easier when he’d been younger, with a core, not actually in charge of their spy network. “I mean, not great. Listen, do you think you can convince your brother to support the Jiang’s claim on the Dafan Wen? It’s for reparations. We’re lacking the manpower to actually rebuild Lotus Pier, not just the money.”

It isn’t a lie, but it’s also not the entire truth. The Dafan Wen weren’t truly participants in the war, and even if, Jiang Wuxian couldn’t care less now. Wen Ning returned his parents’ bodies to them and hid them when they were fugitives.

And Wen Qing is the best healer in the entire country and the only other person who, if she doesn’t know already, is capable of guessing who is hiding behind the Yiling Patriarch’s mask. She’s a dangerous loose end if that knowledge gets out and Jiang Wuxian has put too much effort into it to have it fall apart because she thinks the information might buy her safety the Jiang will offer anyway.

Maybe they could marry her in as well? A whole damn branch sect of healers. It would fill Yunmeng Jiang’s coffers so quickly and give them the boost they desperately need.

“I don’t think brother will argue against it,” Lan Wangji replies.

“That’s great, thank you. I’ll see you at the banquet!”

Age 30

Jiang Wuxian kneels in their shrine, little a-Yuan on his lap.

“Father, Madam Yu, I think we have done well. A-Li is negotiating her betrothal, and a-Cheng is leading the sect even better than I thought he would and you know I’ve always thought he’d make a great sect leader.”

“Xian-gege sad?”

Jiang Wuxian looks down and a-Yuan is quick to wipe his hands over his cheeks. “Ah, was I crying? I’m sorry, a-Yuan. I won’t cry again.”

#mdzs #the untamed #wei wuxian #jiang cheng #jiang fengmian #jiang yanli #fanfic #mdzs fanfic

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wordsandrobots · 6 months

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If there's one thing I crave more of from IBO, it's Bauduin sibling interactions. I've watched that scene with them McGillis in S1E11 more times than I can count.

I do like that we've gotten a few more pieces of the Bauduin family situation from the side-stories. Almiria's assessment of marriage as a man and woman living together in the same house, eating together, going out together, and arguing once a month suggests certain very specific things about Lord and Lady Bauduin's relationship, perhaps making sense of why Gaelio and Almiria's mother is nowhere to be seen come the start of the series. Although, saying that, *none* of the Seven Star kids' mothers appear to be a presence in their lives. When Carta and Iok lose their fathers (effectively and actually), they're placed with guardians rather than being raised by their other parent. Which is probably yet another aspect of the predominance of bloodlines in Gjallarhorn's social mores. When only one parent truly 'counts', intimacy is going to be the first casualty.

I think a lot about how that applies to the Bauduin kids. Because they clearly know each other well enough to be properly annoying, and their father shows genuine concern for them, so I don't imagine their home-life was particularly cold or remote. At the same time, I wonder how much contact Gaelio and Almiria have actually had. The implication is that he's at a boarding school in his teens and then on to military academy. It's possible he only ever saw Almiria during holidays and while on leave. If we're being generous, we might use that to explain why he stresses her babyishness so much -- he's literally missed seeing her grow up. Although, even if that is true, Gaelio is 1) a jerk and 2) kind of weird about the status Almiria throws herself into living up to.

Don't get me wrong, he really needed that 'learning to be a better person by exposure to normal people' arc. Yet we see he has contempt for the corrupt, the underhanded and, significantly, for the specific people in his social circle. "The guests are even more vulgar than usual," indeed! I'd imagine childhood spent in proximity to those in Iok's mould would not give you a good impression of your peers. Coupling that to the whole 'running for the hills when people propose to him', it's feasible Gaelio finds Almiria ridiculous for affecting manners he himself resents. He's standing there, isolated by his status as Gallus' heir, with McGillis and Carta as his only actual friends, and Carta going like that as she gets older, and here's his baby sister acting all prim, too naive to understand she's being used as a pawn. It's small wonder he turns to mocking sarcasm.

For her part, Almiria is caught between the reality of being a child and the expectations placed upon her by the adults in her life. As much as Gaelio mocks her, she *can't* be a baby, or else the whole political structure of their lives falls apart. Being ridiculed for being a little girl is exceptionally cruel in the context of having her husband picked out for her when she was five. Like, what do you want from her, you bastards? Because what you got was a kid who idolised the idea of being grown up as a kind of freedom, while being unable to conceptualise it beyond the social structures that caused her to be in this situation to begin with. Gah, sorry, I know it's off the point, but I am constantly struck by how Almiria in some ways has it worse than the kids who are actually homeless. At least they have some measure of personal autonomy.

Anyway, jerk or no, I still think Gaelio cares for his sister and was sincerely afraid for her following what McGillis said at Edmonton, albeit in a 'I am her big brother so I should be protecting her' sort of way rather than necessarily protecting Almiria the person. I played into that hard when I approached writing their relationship post-canon: with how they were raised and the gaps between them it caused, I feel it's reasonable to assume they each have an idea of the other that causes them certain emotions, without necessarily knowing one another. They are both good at loving shadows, after all, and even if it is genuinely love, I think it would take some very hard conversations to make them close.

(For plot reasons, I weighted that towards Gaelio seeing what he expects/wants while Almiria gains a better understanding of what's going on between his ears, but it's still rather superficial on both sides. Gaelio tries. He really does. Almiria . . . well. Ahem. I did Things with Almiria as a character.)

In terms of scenes we could have gotten but didn't, I'd personally want to see a Bauduin family meal. Gallus, Mrs Gallus, Gaelio and Almiria, all round a table together. Probably a very big one that made it impossible to have comfortable conversations, with fancy food and servants fading into the walls. It'd be the dinner from hell, one way or another, but I'd love to get a glimpse at the full dynamic.

#words in answer #gundam ibo #g tekketsu #Bauduin Family #Gaelio Bauduin #Almiria Bauduin #character interpretation #spoilers

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bbfeelings · 1 year

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My contribution to the first day of Kazuki Week 2023: grief/acceptance. Sorry double posting, but I figure it's more accessible to post the entire fic here on Tumblr. You can also read it on AO3.

Title inspired by this song. And for your vibe considerations.

Your Mess Is Mine

QPR or mlm KazuRei. Post-finale, Pre-Time Skip. Family fluff.

Summary: Kazuki, Rei, and Miri attend Karin's wedding in France. Before this, Kazuki and Rei's relationship was largely undefined because they were both fine with whatever that is going on.

────

When Karin flashed her engagement ring over video chat a year ago, Kazuki didn’t imagine he’d be in the French countryside, walking her down the aisle, with Miri tossing petals just steps before them. Karin clung to “Kazu-nii” all those years ago; and just now, she hooked her arm around his again.

Yuzuko’s death once separated them. Parentless and raised by her elder sister, young Karin went to live with a distant relative up north, while Kazuki remained in Tokyo. He believed that she resented him for taking her only family away. Then they reconnected again, and she fitted right into his newfound family. Miri and Karin adore each other, and Rei warmed up to her quickly, too.

Kazuki feels the tears well up. Don’t cry, don’t cry, they’re taking photos. He looks at her; Karin is beautiful in the gown she designed herself. She looks right back at him, the way she squints when she smiles, the same quirk Yuzuko had. I’m walking her down the aisle, Yuzu. Can you believe it? He presses his lips together, but a blink lets the droplets fall.

“Aw, come on, you’re such a cryer,” Karin says, with a smile so dazzling that he almost misses her misty eyes. “You’re gonna make me cry, too.” The two giggles at how silly they look trying to fight back tears.

────

After retiring from their previous careers and moving out of the city to a seaside town, Kazuki and Rei (mostly Kazuki, really) made local friends and were invited to weddings a couple of times. But this particular wedding is unlike anything they’ve experienced. For starters, the celebration is hosted at a chateau—or what Miri excitedly called a castle. Karin’s husband is an award-winning chef specializing in Japanese-French cuisine, so the food is bound to be exquisite. Not to mention, French weddings are an all-day affair, as they’ve been warned that dinner will be served at 9 pm, and the party after will last till dawn.

As her first trip outside of Japan, or perhaps just as a 9-year-old, Miri is having the time of her life. “We’re staying at a castle!” Their room is furnished with one king-sized bed. Kazuki and Rei looked at each other and shrugged.

In the four and a half years they’ve left their old lives behind, the family of three had had a few living situations. After the loft apartment, they moved into an old unit with a tatami floor in the only bedroom. Much to young Miri’s delight, the three of them slept together for an entire year.

It wasn’t an easy year; stuck in a shoe box, between assimilating into civilian life, parenthood, and Rei’s disability, Kazuki and Rei had disagreements. Many. Never fighting in front of Miri was the one thing they could agree on from the start.

But it was also that year when they grew much closer. The reality forced them to communicate, and to face issues head on. Ultimately, Kazuki and Rei wanted the same thing: a safe, happy childhood for Miri. Every time they fought, it was to protect that vision. In that same year, they began to truly mold and fit into each other, consciously or unconsciously. From Kazuki walking on Rei’s right side, Rei’s ability to maneuver in the kitchen alongside Kazuki, to the way they sleep in the futons on tatami.

────

The day of the wedding, Kazuki stood before the armoire; a black suit for him, a navy suit for Rei, and a satin and tulle dress Karin had made for Miri in a shade of sage green that flatters her eyes and hair. She’d even hand sewed her name, in cursive, on the inside of the dress.

“Reminds me of the night before her first day at daycare,” Kazuki said in a tone reminiscent of something like nostalgia.

“A much better job than we’ll ever do,” Rei took a glance then chuckled.

“Can’t argue with that.”

Kazuki zipped up the dress then fluffed up the wrinkled tulle skirt. Miri twirled excitedly. “Can I go? Can I go?” Her eyes sparkled.

“Don’t run too far, be back here in 10 minutes, okay?” She nodded then disappeared behind the door. By the sound of her heels, she was skipping down the hall.

Kazuki combed and tied Rei’s hair into a sleek low ponytail. Rei had kept it at mid length, after discovering his strands form loose waves with the right haircut, instead of a puffy, frizzy mess. Though Kazuki never called it a mess; he’d say it was fluffy while ruffling through it.

“I can do it myself,” Rei said. Kazuki fastened the necktie just right, then smoothed down the collar. “I know. But I like doing it.”

“Hmm.”

────

After the ceremony, it’s the cocktail hours. When the blonde man finally returns with a plate of hors d'oeuvre and two flutes, Rei snares. “Done harassing your brother-in-law?”

“This is the time! A real, living Michelin star chef. I had to.”

“So what did you steal from him.” Rei takes a sip as he watches Miri playing with other children across the room.

“He said we should try using baguette instead of milk bread for French toast.”

“We could test with baguette on the next day off. What else?”

“Something about olive oil… I’m not sure. His Japanese isn’t fluent. And a lot of the food terms were in French,” Kazuki pauses to enjoy the finger food. “You have to try this.”

Rei studies the little piece of toast with various toppings, “Nah. It has olives.”

Kazuki picks out the olive, eats it, then offers Rei again by shoving it directly in front of his face. Rei reluctantly eats off Kazuki’s hand.

“Not bad.”

“Right?”

────

The dinner was a feast. Multi-course, modern Japanese-French cuisine with wine pairings. Rei swears that Kazuki was nearly brought to tears, again. “The miso? The miso in the sauce? Brilliant. Gosh. I wish I was Karin.” Kazuki gushes.

“Don’t even think about stealing my husband, Kazuki,” the tipsy bride waltzes over with a wine glass in hand. Her pretend stern face turns into giggles as soon as she sees Rei. “I don’t think Rei-kun would be happy with that either!”

“Why wouldn’t I be—“

Karin shushes him. “Stop it. Stop. It flew right over you again and I’m not explaining.” Rei closes his gaping mouth in confusion.

“Go get Miri! I’m doing the bouquet toss in a bit!” The giddy bride says before hopping away towards the groom, who waits to take her hand with the fondest look on his face.

“What was that?” Rei asks. Kazuki puts a hand on his back and shakes his head.

“Figured.”

────

Kazuki and Miri wait with a group of women who are participating in the bouquet toss.

“This is so fun,” She says as she yawns. Too much fun, perhaps. It is getting late. “When you and Rei-papa get married, can I be a flower girl again?” She looks up at Kazuki and asks nonchalantly.

“Eh? Why—“

“Kazuki! Get outta there! You’re not getting this bouquet!” Karin shouts and swings her arm dramatically. Her cheeks are flushed and her steps are slightly unsteady. She looks so happy.

“My bad, my bad…” Kazuki holds up his hands as he moves out of the way. The guests laugh at their sibling banter.

The excited crowd gathers. This is where the real fun of the night begins. Karin turns around and does a couple of swings before her toss; the guests watch attentively in anticipation.

“Three… two… one!” The bride jumps and hurls backward, sending the bouquet across the ballroom. In front of the group, Miri realizes the bundle of flowers isn’t coming their way. It’s going completely sideways, towards the wine table. Everyone’s eyes follow the flying bouquet.

Rei flexes his left arm and catches it backhandedly. He turns around, prosecco in one hand, flowers in the other, utterly flabbergasted. The guests go wild; several women swarm him. That man wasn’t even looking!

Miri weaves through the traffic, throws herself at Rei, and squeals. “That was so cool!” She beams and hugs his waist tightly. “My papas are getting married!”

“Eh? What do you mean—“

“Congratulations!” The guests cheer, making him even more flustered. What is Miri saying? He scans the crowd in a panic, but couldn’t find a single familiar face.

Then he sees it. Strawberry blonde, a pair of bright, tea-brown eyes, and a crooked grin. Kazuki swims through the crowd and makes it to Rei and Miri.

“Rei-papa and Kazuki-papa are getting married!”

“Wow, haha, um, nice catch!” Kazuki says awkwardly. Damn it, my nerves! Rei doesn’t say anything, eyes wide like a deer in the headlight. “Um, you all right? Rei?”

“I saw something in the corner of my eye and… this.” He holds up the bouquet, “That wasn’t very normal people of me.” Rei mutters, ears still hot from all the attention.

Kazuki chuckles slyly, “Sure was very assassin of you.”

Rei dishes a side eye and chucks the flowers in his face.

────

They finally coaxed Miri into going to bed. The condition: she gets to hold on to the bouquet when she does. The two men step out to the garden for some fresh air. Rei takes out a brand new pack of cigarettes in French packaging.

“Haven’t seen you smoke in a while,” Kazuki commented.

“Well, it’s for the occasion.” He lights it up, takes a drag, and promptly coughs.

“Can’t handle it anymore?”

“Shut up. I just wasn’t expecting it to be this strong.”

The lively music flows out from the chateau, a stark contrast to the serene and sleepy countryside.

“…would you do it?”

“Do what?”

“Sign the papers.”

“Sign what papers?”

“Gosh, Rei, do I really need to spell it out?”

“You know the answer.”

“Fine.” Kazuki sighs, wishing he’d had a drink before this. “Like, getting married or whatever. Hypothetically, of course.”

Rei takes a long drag and exhales. “I mean, you’re the one who was married.”

“That was different.”

“How so?”

Kazuki pictures the day he and Yuzuko got married at the city hall. She was in a sundress, and he was in a shirt and tie that were sold as a set. But that wasn’t really it, was it? Marriage is… what comes after. Though their marriage barely lasted, and it wasn’t their fault. Kazuki reaches his hand over, Rei passes the cigarette.

Kazuki coughs.

“Told you.”

“Yeah, thanks for the warning.” Regaining composure, Kazuki continues. “You know she died six months later.”

Rei remains silent.

“But it was easy—the decision to get married. It was just the thing to do, you know? If I could do it over, I’d marry her again. She was what I needed. At the time. I… loved her. I really did. And I still do, I think.” He pauses, looking back at the chateau. “Like how I love Karin and Miri. I’d do anything for them—I’d die in their place, if I could.”

The thought of Miri or Kazuki dying sends a chill down his spine. Rei turns his head away. “That’s grim. We’re at a wedding.”

“I know. But—and then there’s you. And I’d do the same for you, too.”

“I can handle myself.”

“That’s not what I mean.”

“Then what do you mean, Kazuki? You asked me a hypothetical question and went on about… about the people you love. What’s that got to do with each other? I can’t understand you when you go roundabout like that.” Rei pauses, filling his lungs with brisk air. “I need you to tell me exactly what it is.”

Kazuki traces the outline of the man before him, then puts his arm around his slim frame. Rei leans in and rests his head on his shoulder. “We’re not fighting though, are we?”

“Of course not, dummy,” Kazuki says softly.

“Idiot.”

“Jerk.”

“…it’s warm.”

“Hmm.”

“I like you.”

“What did you just say?” Kazuki pulls away, “What are you, a teenager?”

“I didn’t like anyone when I was a teenager.”

“Don’t get smart with me,” he fixes Rei’s crooked tie, “I love you.”

Rei brings them back together and burrows his face in the strawberry blonde.

“I love you, too.”

────

The guests circle the newlyweds as they open the dance. Kazuki and Rei watch from a safe distance, sipping on drinks.

Rei finishes his dessert wine. “This is delicious, why do they serve it in such a small glass?”

“Probably because only an ant like you could drink it,” Kazuki scrunches his nose, “It’s sickly sweet.”

“No, it’s not, it has… layers.”

“I think it’s too sweet.”

“Can we stock these at the diner?”

“Absolutely not.”

“You suck,” Rei pouts, “I’m going to get more.”

10 minutes later, Rei is visibly tipsy. “I learned,” he says as he puts his hand on the small of Kazuki’s back, “these are called dessert wine.” His eyes twinkle. Oh no. Kazuki knows this look.

“Let’s go!” Rei tugs on the lapels.

“You don’t even like dancing!”

“Yeah, but, Karin says we have to.”

Kazuki glances over, Karin is in the middle of the dance floor, picking up her floor-length skirt, laughing and twirling to the poppy music. Kazuki hesitates. He can’t dance to save his life. A happy drunk Rei is mesmerized by the joy spilling over from the dance floor.

Then the music changes. It’s a slower instrumental piece; anyone can tell that it’s a love song. The crowd slows down. Then the groom waltzes in, Karin takes his hand. Cheek to cheek, they step and sway to the rhythm. The guests pair up and follow their lead.

Rei looks at Kazuki, eyes twinkling. He gives in. Then Rei smiles the only way he can: a thin-lipped, strained smile. But Kazuki knows better than anyone else. This is Rei’s happy face. He takes his left hand, and he places his right on his heart. He pulls him in with an arm around the waist.

“Is your arm okay like that?” Kazuki asks, in a voice only Rei can hear. Rei hums. They move with the music; knowing nothing about dancing, they just follow their instincts. Rei puts his head down on Kazuki’s shoulder and closes his eyes.

“Don’t fall asleep on me.”

“Hmm.”

────

Daylight breaks into the ballroom, the partied-out guests sit around, nibbling hot onion soup.

Rei’s glossy, wavy, raven-colored hair is down, draping over his shoulders. Kazuki’s shirt is stained with wine. Their ties are missing. The two huddle together, eating soup.

“If it’s possible, it’d be nice.”

“What?”

“To get married. To you.”

“I see.”

“Tsk. That’s it?”

“You want me to propose now?”

“Maybe.”

“Then I propose to—add French onion soup to the menu.”

“Okay.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. It’s delicious.”

“That’d be nice.”

“Hmm.”

“To get married. If it’s possible. That is.”

“Okay. What about dessert wine?”

“No.”

“Fine.”

Kazuki warps Rei into his arms and rests his chin on his left shoulder. Their cheeks touch; slightly sticky with sweat, wine, and maybe a little bit of happy tears.

[ The End ]

Thank you for reading! Fun fact: the baguette French toast is a secret menu at this little cafe run by a French couple near where I used to live. The best French toast hands down. I want to thank the anon who sent in the lovely idea of a KazuRei story at Karin’s wedding.

Check out my other Buddy Daddies fics in the pinned post, if you'd like!

#sorry for crowding #formatting on tumblr is hard #lmk if you prefer reading on this app #kurusu kazuki #suwa rei #kazurei #kazukiweek2023 #buddy daddies #buddy daddies fic

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schrijverr · 1 year

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Holly's Letter

Years after she last saw her brother and sister, Holly sees the book A Collection of Queer Photography in the stores. It gives her the courage to reach out to them again. This is her letter.

On AO3.

Ships: byler & jargancy, Holly has a husband

Warnings: mentions of past homophobia (vaguely)

~~~~~~~~

Dear Nancy and Mike,

I have started this letter a hundred times already now, because I have so much to tell you and yet I don’t know what to say to you at all. It feels odd to introduce myself, but I almost feel like I have to, since I haven’t seen either of you since I was 9 years old. So, hi, I’m Holly, your little sister. My last name is Richardson now and I am married with two kids.

I am writing you both after reading your book. I try to keep an eye out for such things ever since my eldest, Lisa, came out to me, and I hope you can imagine the shock of seeing your faces after so many years. There, right on the cover, were the two of you, just like I remember from my childhood. Thinking back, I must have stood in that book shop for 30 minutes just staring, before a sales associate asked me if I needed any help. Of course I bought the book.

When I came home, I read it completely and I cried. Truly, I did. It is a weird feeling and I hope I can explain it right. It is weird, because you two left and never turned back and I hated you for a long time over it and now I had answers. Suddenly I knew why you left. And it makes so much sense that you would go and while I am angry and sad at how you left, I am so so glad that you two are happy now. That you found a better family.

Mom and dad divorced in in 1991. They tried to keep it together for my sake, but my mom blamed him for you two leaving and dad- well, dad was just dad. It didn’t work out. I lived with mom and barely talk to dad anymore. It seemed like life fell apart when you two left.

Before now, I never put work into finding either of you. The lack of the internet made it harder, but it was more that I thought you wouldn’t want me there. Like mom, I blamed myself for you leaving, I didn’t understand. Now I do.

I showed mom the book too, she never gave it back, so I bought another copy for myself. I think she has spend days already flipping through the pages and lingering on your faces. I can’t say I blame her, me and my eldest have gone through it together and I told her about her aunt and uncle. All the little things I can still remember from when you still came home. We laughed and we cried and she hugged me. It was a thankful hug and I don’t think I can ever forget it again.

It is probably odd how much I feel like I still relate to you after 28 years, but I do. One of my earliest memories is sitting on the couch with Steve when he was still together with Nancy. I remember the games Mike and the others played in the basement. I remember the fight when you wanted to spend Christmas with the Byers. Little flashes of you, before you were just ghosts haunting family albums and strained conversations with mom or dad.

But it is more than that for me. I never realized how much I am still intertwined with you, even throughout these years without contact. Like, I never realized that the Will Byers, who made my favorite paintings, is the same Will Byers that my older brother was friends with. And I never realized that the article that got mom better pay in 1993 was written by you, Nancy. As a college student I ate at Argyle’s diner with friends after getting drunk. I still braid my hair like Steve taught me. I voted for Erica without making the connection. I also work in education. My husband loves Corroded Coffin. All these little things have bound me to the family you made and that makes me feel connected to you in ways I haven’t in years.

In your book you said you hoped I was okay and that I grew up kind. I hope I am too. I know I grew up okay, I am happy where I am. And I try to be kind, I try to do better. I don’t know if that is enough, but I’m trying. I would love to meet you and your partners. I’d love to catch up with you and hear about everything, even the small things that didn’t make it into the book. And I’d love to tell you about myself and my family too.

Of course, I can understand if you would not want to see me, or if you would, but you’d like not to talk to mom again. I can stand here and tell you how she has changed, how she accepts her granddaughter and treasures the two of you more than her old bigotry, but I don’t think that is my decision to make. So, I’ll leave that to you.

I do hope that you want to see me, that we can catch up and I can get to know your partners more personally, as well as relearn who you two are now. And I hope I can tell you about my husband, Marvin, who is a lawyer, and our two beautiful kids. I’ve already mentioned Lisa, my eldest. She is fifteen now and so smart. She is part of the debate team at her high school and helps run the GSA. Her favorite subject is Math and I’m glad, because I never know how to help Ellie, my youngest, with her Math homework, so her older sister helps her. Ellie is eleven now, already getting way too big for my comfort haha. She’s a little ball of sunshine, always full of energy and smiles. She loves drawing and is so creative. The two are adorable together.

We live in a suburb in a small town near Indiana. I myself work as a preschool teacher nearby, but I only work part time and spend most time looking after the kids while Marvin is at work. We’ve been married for sixteen years now and still going strong. It was so nice to see you also still together with your partners and happy.

I must admit how odd it was to see you grown up. In my mind you two are still the people from ‘89, a young woman and a kid, who just reached into adulthood. Now both of you are fully fledged professionals with families and a career. Just like me.

I know you haven’t been frozen in time, but it felts like it for so long. It is weird to think that you have lived whole lives, had so many experiences, grown so much, and I wasn’t there to see it. Logically, I know the same must be true for you in regards to me, but I can’t help but let it boggle my mind. But I’m glad I got my mind boggled by you looking so happy.

I honestly don’t know if anything in this letter is making sense. No matter how much time has passed since I first picked up your book, my thoughts can’t seem to order themselves. At least not coherently on a piece of paper. However, I do want to reach out and I hope that I’ll get a reply and it will make it easier to place it all.

I also hope that this letter doesn’t come off as accusatory. I admit that I have been bitter in the past, but I have put that behind me. And I completely understand why you did what you did. I think this book has given me the closure I needed to pack away that last inkling that came from not knowing why. Even if this letter gets lost or I never hear back from you, I want to thank you for that.

Rationally, I know I have a thousand more things to tell you, but I’ve also completely blanked on what to say further. So, I’m just going to wrap it up and send it, before I can think about too much and scrap the whole thing again, like I’ve already done so many times.

Much love and kisses,

Holly Richardson

#rr writing #a collection of queer photography by jonathan byers #holly wheeler #nancy wheeler #mike wheeler #mike wheeler x will byers #argyle x jonathan x nancy #jargancy #byler #stranger things #st post season 4

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reunionatdawn · 2 months

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My Analysis of the Best Paired Endings in 3H (Part 18: AM Ingrid/Ashe)

Ingrid: …My father, too, brought up marriage proposals to ensure the family's survival numerous times. I had a fiancé when I was a child… But he passed away at a young age… Mercedes: If that fiancé were still alive… Would you have married him? Ingrid: Well… who knows? I can't even imagine it myself. But I do know that I admired him. A proud way of life as a knight serving the king. Even now, I've always wanted to be a knight like him. I want to live as a knight, not as a tool for the family's survival. Regardless of what my father says.

Ingrid was also a victim of Faerghus's patriarchal culture. She was sold by her father and engaged to Glenn the same year she was born in order to pass on her Crest. There's no question that she loved her fiancé dearly, but I suspect that her love was more like that of a sister toward a brother rather than actual romantic love. She wasn't sure if she would have married him if he had survived.

The Crest of Daphnel is associated with The Chariot arcana. The message is one of maintaining focus and confidence in the pursuit of your goals. It suggests that your strength and commitment is being tested by the universe, so don't give up or look for shortcuts. It also signifies the need to take action and move forward. Finally, it can represent a need to control your own destiny.

Dorothea: I could never hand over my lovely Ingrid to some jerk who only wants her for her Crest. Ingrid: Oh? Do I belong to you now, rather than to myself?

Ingrid's paralogue was about her and Dorothea's contrasting views of marriage. Ingrid was not looking for a provider. Even though she needed the funds, she wanted to belong to herself. Not her father, not her brothers, not a husband. She didn't want to marry a man she wasn't in love with for a dowry. Knighthood was the only way she could pledge her life to a man she chose for herself.

Ingrid: [W]e hardly ever played together. The age gap was just too great. My eldest brother in particular was incredibly strict with me. Whenever I would try to go horseback riding through the hills, he would say… "How dare you do something so dangerous! What if something happened to you?!" What's worse, my father agreed with him. It kept me from getting out on too many adventures as a child. Thinking back on it, I understand their concern. I was the only one in the family to bear a Crest, after all.

Ingrid was also not looking for a protector. She wanted to live an active adventurous lifestyle protecting those she cared for. Knighthood was also a way for her to hold onto her childhood happiness. A time where she was truly free.

Felix: House Fraldarius has been the king's lance and shield for generations. Ever since the time of Kyphon, sworn friend of the great King Loog. At times we've been sent to defeat the crown's enemies. At others, we've held back to defend the throne. I admit the style has its uses, idiotic history of blind faith aside.

Ingrid dreamt of obtaining knighthood and defending the king ever since she was a little girl. Growing up, she was obsessed with the book Sword of Kyphon which was about Loog's "sworn friend". The Aegis Shield is based on Greek Mythology. Rodrigue's middle name is "Achille". The writers were probably inspired by Achilles from the Iliad.

Ingrid: [Kyphon] was the very picture of the perfect knight. In my opinion, the best chapter is right around the middle of the book… Ashe: Ah, the part about the War of the Eagle and Lion? That's my favorite part! "In a flash, Kyphon's sword flew from its scabbard. The knight parried the assassin's blade mere inches from the spine of his king."

If so, Kyphon probably had feelings for Loog beyond just friendship. That may be why Ingrid identified with him. And it's also why she and Rodrigue (though he is the topic for a different post) idealized a knight's death so much. Ingrid didn't just want to serve her country. She wanted to serve as the lance and shield to a man she was in love with. And she was willing to make the ultimate sacrifice for him.

Ingrid: I want to serve as a knight and protect my homeland. I know this, through and through. It has been my truth for as long as I can remember. However, I feel that I should choose a path that would benefit my father. I was raised by him in a happy home, never wanting for anything, despite my family's meager finances. I owe it to him to choose a path he'd approve of.

AM!Ingrid was willing to completely give up on her dream and choose a path that would make her father happy. But she has an A+ Support conversation with Seteth that is exclusive to AM. He encourages her to talk with her father and he will respect her wishes.

Ingrid: But even if I do become a knight, I feel an unease deep within me. I fear I will never escape this guilt I carry. That I have shunned my duty as a noble. Byleth: Could you not find a way to do both? Ingrid: To follow both my dream and my duty? I…I had never considered that as an option. Perhaps there is a way.

The idea that she could be a wife and a knight never seemed to occur to her until Byleth suggested it. But that did seem to be the solution to her problems. She becomes a knight in every one of her AM endings, except when paired with Felix or Sylvain.

Ingrid: Oh, you mean the makeup? That's exaggerated. I just learned a bit from Annette. It's still trial and error… Hey Sylvain, do you think I've changed somehow?

In Ingrid's A+ Support with Sylvain, she was wearing makeup before heading to the training grounds. She didn't necessarily dislike looking her best, but she resented the social pressure to pretty herself up for men to "pounce" on. So, the fact that she was dolled up was uncharacteristic for her.

Sylvain: No, I'm not really flustered… I just got a little curious about the reason, is all. Ingrid: …The reason for the makeup, huh. What do you think it is? Sylvain: Well… Is it because of a guy? If we're talking about someone you might like, going by your past tendencies… Felix… No, His Highness also has a chance.

Sylvain was very flustered, suspecting it must be for a guy. His first assumption is Felix, due to her past history with Glenn. But Dimitri was another possibility.

Sylvain: It might also be because of the knights… Oh, wait, me!? Ingrid: I'll hit you. Sylvain: W-wait, I was just kidding! I'm against violence! Being too rough ruins a beauty, you know! ………… Uh, well. I-I mean, when I say "beauty," I'm not talking about flirting or anything, yeah! Ingrid: …Beauty, huh. Hehe.

He also suspected it might be for him, but Ingrid shut that down pretty fast. She was flattered by his compliment, but it was left very ambiguous whether she was wearing the makeup for him or not.

Ingrid: Usually, I wore men's clothing, ran around in the mountains with male friends, and played around. And then… After my fiancé's death, I definitely wanted to avoid anything feminine. Thinking, "There's no need to show it to him," and… I've been bound by something like guilt for a long time.

In the Japanese version of the Ingrid/Sylvain A+ Support, Ingrid mentioned that Annette had been helping her practice her makeup. Her Support with Annette was about how she felt guilty for looking feminine. The fact that she had finally changed her appearance implied that she was ready to move on from Glenn. So, I do believe that Sylvain was right, and she was wearing the makeup for a guy.

Dimitri: You displayed unwavering, excellent spear skills. Was there indeed some change in your state of mind? Ingrid: ...As I mentioned before, thanks to Your Highness, I can move forward.

In her A-Support with Dimitri, she said that she could finally move on from Glenn's death because of him. It even took place at the training grounds, the place she was headed to in her A+ Support with Sylvain.

Dimitri: Ah, yes, that's right. …What did that mean exactly? Ingrid: …I finally managed to accept the truth I've been avoiding for so long. Glenn must have felt deep regret. Yet, I myself didn't want to acknowledge it. I've been twisting his true nature, imposing my ideals, and averting my gaze… Dimitri: …I see.

The tagline for the game was, "Sweet memories twisted by time's cruel hand". Ingrid coped with grief by romanticizing the truth. She had to believe that Glenn died a picture-perfect death like the ones in her childhood storybooks, because the truth was just too horrible. Her Support chain with Dimitri was about realizing that she was projecting her own feelings onto Glenn.

Ingrid: …Your Highness. I won't sacrifice my life for anyone else. But, would you allow me to live for someone else, Your Highness? Not in the sense of throwing away my life—I want to dedicate my life to you. Dimitri: ...Hold on. How should I interpret that? Ingrid: …? However you please, Your Highness. Dimitri: Haha… "However I please," huh. …You win. Ingrid. Once this battle is over, I want you to… As a knight, I want you to support me. …I've been meaning to say that for a while now. We seem to get along well. Ingrid: …As a knight? Uh, um, no! It's nothing! Of course, even without being told, I was planning to fight for you… and, um, for my country.

Ingrid's offer to pledge her life to Dimitri as a knight was essentially a marriage proposal as well. She won't even make a wish with Byleth at the Goddess Tower. And this is actually the ONLY A-Support where her feelings are unambiguously romantic. She dreamt of being a knight to be close to him. If she married Dimitri, she knew she could fulfill both her dream and her duty to her father. Therefore, if you're playing AM, I believe that Ingrid was wearing the makeup for Dimitri.

While Ingrid's feelings were very clear, Dimitri's response to her "proposal" is a lot more ambiguous. He did not ask her to be his wife like she was hoping, only to become his knight. It could be interpreted as him just being shy. Or it could be interpreted as an awkward rejection. Based on Ingrid's sad expression, it did seem like she interpreted his response as him letting her down gently.

Felix: So… He's finally shown his true face. The same Dimitri I've seen once before—a beast who loves spilling blood. Ingrid: You're wrong! I'm sure of it. There has to be an explanation…

Ingrid probably did the same to Dimitri as she did to Glenn. She was holding onto an idealistic childhood fantasy and could only see him as he was when they were kids, even though he had changed. She was in complete denial of his boar side. Dimitri was willing to throw away his childhood friends' lives at Gronder Field, including hers. He did turn his life around thanks to Byleth, but it wasn't surprising to me that he didn't feel comfortable accepting her marriage proposal.

Dimitri: If you're willing, would you like to go together? Of course, if you still feel hesitant, I won't force you… Ingrid: …No! Please, let me accompany you. It's embarrassing, but I probably would have hesitated to go alone. But with you… I feel like I can take a step forward without fear. Dimitri: I see. Alright, let's not waste any time. Allow me to treat you today, Ingrid.

In Hopes, Dimitri was able to help Ingrid face the reality of Glenn's death sooner and move forward. We even learn that she wanted to go to the castle to support him after the Tragedy of Duscur, but her father wouldn't let her. Dimitri always did want a girlfriend and he actually seemed very interested in Ingrid in Hopes. She gladly accepted when he offered to treat her to a meal.

Sylvain: Alright, then. Let me help you out… let's have a meal. My treat, miss. Ingrid: Wait a minute. Are you trying to flirt with me? I thought you'd matured. Sylvain: Oh, come on… I'm just trying to be thoughtful. Don't turn down a kind gesture, or you'll regret it. Ingrid: …I suppose you're right. Thank you for your consideration, Sylvain.

It's worth noting that in their Hopes A-Support, Sylvain also offered to treat her to a meal. She was more than happy to eat on his coin, but only if it's not a date. While Sylvain is often viewed as the "canon" love interest for Ingrid, I didn't really see any evidence that her love for him was anything other than sisterly. She was so fed up with his sexism that she took her annoyance with him out on Claude.

They made the Ingrid/Sylvain A+ ambiguous enough for you to view Sylvain as her love interest if you want. But they also left it open for Dimitri and there's more evidence that he was the one Ingrid had romantic feelings for, even if she never thought marrying the king was possible. I think that in the Hopes timeline, they probably would have ended up together. But in Houses, Dimitri was just too different.

Ingrid: As you said, situations change whether we like it or not… Nobody can stay the same. Of course, neither you nor I are exceptions… It's just that, I feel a little lonely because of it.

In VW, Dimitri is assumed to be dead. However, a recruited Ingrid still runs away from home in order to become a knight. So, her childhood dream was not solely related to her feelings for Dimitri. She wanted to go back to the past.

Ingrid: My friends and I used to explore the countryside together when we were young. I dearly miss those days.

Ingrid was a tomboy who loved playing outside, getting dirty, and going on adventures. In Hopes, her central conflict was not just about marriage but also about the fact that she was inevitably going to lead House Galatea. She hated desk work and was dreading the changes that would inevitably come along with adulthood and becoming a count, doing mountains of paperwork.

Ingrid: Knights, I suppose. I do what I can to live like one. And I hope to die like one too…when the time comes.

If Shez takes Ingrid out on an expedition and asks her what she likes, her response is quite disturbing. Even though she had given up on her dream, she said that she was still planning to die like a knight, implying that she was hoping to die during the war. And in SB, she dies like a true knight, just as she hoped.

Dimitri: At the Tragedy of Duscur, I saw countless corpses. Of course, I saw his too…Glenn's. Ingrid, I doubt you would have been able to see him. They were unable to bring his body back, after all. He must have died an agonizing death, full of pain and regret. That is what I saw in his face. Ingrid: … Dimitri: In that wasteland, there were no beautiful, proud deaths that could have been written about in heroic tales. Not one. I do not want you to die a death like that. Not even for the sake of loyalty or duty.

Glenn was Dimitri's best friend and even he died with a heavy heart. But Ingrid actually was content to die protecting Dimitri. And I'm sure her romantic feelings for her king played a role. Symbolically, she dies at the Silver Maiden (named after a pure maiden that is hard to penetrate). But I cannot help but suspect that her romanticization of a knight's death was also influenced by the fact that she was not looking forward to her future as a tradwife and Count Galatea.

Gilbert: Once you don the armor, raise your shield, and level your lance… Why? What is it you wish to protect? Ashe: Protect? I, um… Well, whatever needs protecting, right? Gilbert: You must know exactly what you protect before you become a knight.

Like Ingrid, it was Ashe's dream to become a knight. He wanted to be like his adoptive father Lonato, who he thought was the very model of chivalry. And his character arc was about how to come to terms with Lonato's death.

Ashe: I don't think that friend who protected you threw his life away because he was a knight. He just wanted to save his best friend. Dimitri: Even if it meant destroying futures that might have come to pass had he but lived? Ashe: Look, I don't know if what he did was right. So if you're asking me not to throw my life away, I promise that I won't. But I don't think it's wrong to fight to the end for someone that you love.

Ashe gets some pretty interesting development in Hopes. He becomes a knight to House Blaiddyd, just like in his AM paired ending with Ingrid (it's actually the only ending where he becomes a royal knight). He has a rather naive and rosy view of chivalry, while Dimitri has a more cynical view. Ashe agrees with him, but he does respect the idea of fighting to the end for someone he loves.

Ashe: I'm glad Lonato made it out safely, but… But we killed Ingrid. I can't ever go back, can I? There's no place left for me in Faerghus. Whatever part of me that was a knight is dead.

And he clearly needs that kind of personal motivation. Outside of AG, Ashe is one of the only Lions who has the option to defect from Faerghus. In SB, he wanted to protect Lonato. But his primary motivation in GW was to save his own life. Becoming a knight was one thing, but it turns out living up the ideal was a lot harder. Ingrid is the one who takes his betrayal the most personally. And when she is killed, the part of Ashe that was a knight dies along with her.

Gilbert: Lord Lonato took up his sword for his son. Even if that meant turning his back on the goddess… As a father, I cannot condemn Lord Lonato for raising an army. Yet, perhaps he too lost sight of what should be protected. Just as I did. Ashe: I don't understand what you mean. What should Lonato have protected? Gilbert: You, Ashe. Because you are also his son. Ashe: You're right… I think I know what I need to protect now.

Ingrid didn't just want to follow orders. She wanted to protect those she loved. And Gilbert told Ashe that to he needed to know exactly what he was protecting when he became a knight. He needed something personal; the way Gilbert had his family. Ashe wanted Lonato to live on through him.

Ashe: Um, anyway, I just… wanted you to smile. Ingrid: …Thank you, Ashe. You're encouraging me. Certainly, living as a knight may not be an easy path. .…We may be forced to live while bearing great pain and regret. But… I want to continue pursuing that dream. Talking with you makes me feel that way. Besides, giving up easily isn't like me at all.

And that's what A-Support with Ingrid was about. Lonato changed Ashe's life with a book. And Ingrid was encouraged to carry on her dream and Glenn's legacy thanks to the book Ashe gifted her. I also think he'd be able to help her move on from Dimitri, too. That's why I think these two characters complement each other's character arcs the best and are indispensable to each other as knights.

Ingrid & Ashe After the war, with a new king ascending the throne of Faerghus, Ingrid left House Galatea and joined the royal capital, Fhirdiad, to serve the royal family as a knight. Likewise, Ashe departed from his homeland of Gaspard and chose the path to become a knight of the royal family. Devoted to the future of the Kingdom, they took on any duty to protect the king. Eventually, they were praised as the "Twin Pillars of Knights" and left their mark in many tales of chivalry. In some stories, they are depicted as a loving couple. While the truth remains unknown, it is certain that they fought together until the end of their lives and were each other's inseparable companions.

In Ingrid's ending with Ashe, she lives out her childhood dream. She and Ashe even get a cool nickname similar to the Ferdibert ending. Ashe is known for his boundless courage and devotion. He is the picture-perfect knight from the story books, completely different from the cowardice he displayed in Hopes.

While the Japanese version does not mention marriage, it is implied that Ingrid and Ashe spent their loves together as lovers. Still, it is left up to interpretation. Outside AM, they explicitly fall in love and get married, so I have no reason to believe they weren't lovers in AM as well. But the point is that Ingrid went down in history for her own accomplishments, not just as someone's wife.

#fe3h #fe3h meta #ingrid brandl galatea #ashe duran #ashegrid

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transuncletaylor · 3 months

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(tw: some childhood neglect and abuse talk)

My therapist had me talking to my younger self the last two sessions and I decided I wanted to write her a letter. And then share it as an act of vulnerability and letting people in, but also to continue my story and hope that it helps someone else out. And maybe because I want someone to read it and tell me I'm doing okay.

I didn't know what to say to her the first time my therapist had asked me what I would say. I don't actually remember what I did say even though it was just a week ago. Today I told her I was sorry. I was sorry that she had to go through all of that growing up and I'm so sorry for what she's about to go through.

However, I told her we made it. We can't see right now that we've made it further than we could have ever imagined, but we're here and we're learning to see with eyes unclouded. We realized lately that we struggle not needing approval from others, that we can get that inwardly, and that we have nothing to prove, we don't need to prove why we are worth love or kindness or space. We're working on letting in the love of others and really feeling it and loving in return.

But young Taylor, there's so much I wish I could go back in time to tell you. I want to reiterate that I'm so sorry you had to go through all of that and you worked with what you had. You had to scrape by and steal and go hungry because all you had after rent and bills was $10 and a bag of oranges until you could go to yours mother's home. You fished donuts out of dumpsters for fun, but that kept you fed. You medicated yourself because feeling became too much to bear after college and your shitty friends encouraged it. I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry that I didn't know better, that I did what others told me to do because they were all I had.

We changed our life around, applied for grad school when Ian applied because we didn't know what we wanted to do so we did what he did. Our mom kept us on puppet strings and so when we started slipping line by line, we looked for someone else to guide our broken strings. He wasn't the worst, but he was still an emotionally unavailable white cis gay man who didn't give you the support you needed and put you in a box to make you smaller, palpable, telling you you were too much. We had our fun though and today we look back on those times together fondly, but it's not what we need now.

Young Taylor, I'm so sorry for hating you. I'm so sorry I thought we were broken and there was something wrong with us. We were playing by a rulebook and milestones that weren't for us and it took 2020 for us to see it. I'm so sorry for thinking you were unattractive, I look back at photos of you and think about how beautiful you were as a woman, but that beauty grew so much when you got into the right body. There wasn't anything wrong with you, you were never broken. You were hurt and you had to make do with what you had.

You weren't undatable and unloveable. You weren't made to be in a cishet relationship or fit the role of a southern girlfriend with pearls and ribbon in her hair. Your brother and sister married their first partners in their late twenties, but they knew their genders and sexuality. You didn't get to play in your field for a long time. I'm sorry, young Taylor, I'm sorry for thinking that we couldn't be loved.

You are so loved young Taylor. Your sister loves you, her husband loves you, your niece and nephew especially love you. He asked you if you could come over soon and your niece draws on her arms to mimic your tattoos. She's a wild one, be wary of her. She likes to climb kitchen counters at almost 3 to blow out the candle your sister has lit.

Jesse ended our friendship in 2016, Ian in 2021, you kicked Tyler to the curb just a few months later. Scarlett I think you cut out in 2019 and that was for the best, she was a real bitch and pick me girl. But just because Jesse and Ian left us, it wasn't because of anything we did and sure we have our faults, we're only human, but Jesse left because you stood your ground and didn't want to be ignored and lied to as he would look for hook ups whenever you hung out in public. Ian was a transphobic asshole whose Netflix password was 2020Trump2024, so really, losing him was the best thing that happened. He didn't even have the guts to tell you he didn't want to be friends after 13 years of friendship. He tried to ghost you until you asked his boyfriend what was up. Also fuck both Jeremies.

But you are so loved. You always were. And you are especially now. You have great people in your life now, those who love all of your being no matter how loud and how much space you take. No one is trying to make you anything other than who you want to be. They only want to see you happy and flourishing and be your authentic true self and for you to be you. Because that's all you ever had to be. You just have to be you. Because you are so worthy of love and life and happiness not because of what you accomplished, not what you know or who you know or what you could give to others. Because you're Taylor. And Taylor, you have always been worthy of love, of being loved, and loving in return.

So I end this letter to myself by saying we made it. Mom said we wouldn't make it past 25. We didn't think we would make it past 32. But here we are just a few months shy of 35 and we have made it. You are me now. We have food in the fridge that we love, we aren't living paycheck to paycheck, our bed is full of blankets and pillows and stuffies and no one to tell us that we have too many blankets and pillows and stuffies. We have bunnies who love us, yes, even Dusty loves us though he's kind of aloof. We have a face with a beard that we don't shy our eyes away in the mirror anymore. Our family has grown with aunts, uncles, cousins that you haven't talked to in a very long time and friends who love you unconditionally.

Young Taylor, I am so sorry we had to endure all of that. But we can rest now, we made it. We are here. You did it. I did it. I'm where I always wanted to be. And there's so much left for us to see and explore and experience and learn and grow and I'm so excited to do this with you in my past and so excited to see who we are in the future.

I love you. I love us. I love me.

#taylor talks #tw abuse #tw therapy #long letter is long

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sims-for-semi · 1 year

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The day Bella killed Michael - a sims story

“Do you want to be with the girl or not, Michael? Just drink the damn nectar,” Bella said wearily. Michael had noticed long ago that Bella was acting differently, but today she was particularly pissed off for no apparent reason.

“Didn’t you say it wasn’t ready yet? That you and Mortimer were feeling older?”

“Not anymore. It’s working. You just have to be in a good mood to receive it.”

“Have you been in a good mood, Bella?”

“Don’t I look younger?”

“Younger, but… gloomier.”

“Well, imagine. My brother is dating a girl who is my daughter's age, how am I supposed to feel?”

Time later, Bella would remember that exact day when her brother began to die. It was a cold morning, particularly foggy at 165 Sim Lane. Although Michael didn’t live in Pleasantview, he visited often, and the last time he had brought not only his new girlfriend, Dina, but also her twin sister, Nina. At first Bella thought it was a joke (“You brought two of Cassie's schoolmates to my house?”), but then she felt quite hushed. Nina was quiet, but fiercely bold in her comments. And Dina was charming. Even Bella couldn't argue with that. She had never felt so threatened in her own home. Everyone was captivated by her presence. Even Mortimer, her Mortimer.

Michael would later confess his concerns about the relationship. "I love her, Bella. I love her, but come on, I'm not twenty anymore. She says she feels the same way I do but what can I offer her?"). And while Bella wasn't particularly happy about the relationship, she did hate to see her brother troubled. She could barely stand the sight of her grumpy old husband, her solitary teen daughter, and her handful toddler. If Michael wanted to rejuvenate, she could give him exactly what he needed.

“She’s not a girl, Bella.”

“She’s so young. Perfect skin, perfect hair. I never got to be that young.”

“What do you mean?”

“I got married to my childhood friend, had a daughter in my late teens… I stopped being young a long time ago. But you get to be young with your brand-new girl. Enjoy it. Drink the nectar.”

Michael wasn’t sure of it. He didn’t trust the nectar. Heck, these days he couldn’t even trust Mortimer. He couldn’t trust him, nor Bella. What had happened to her? She used to be such a loyal, brave girl. Now all she did was act like she was some sort of tragic heroine, like she could never have any fun. Maybe that’s why they had grown apart the last couple of years.

Bella thought the same about her brother. He was this popular kid in school, a sports enthusiast, the ideal son… all of that changed. Being a bachelor for so long had made some changes in his personality, she believed. Not like she hadn't changed, clearly, but at least she was already married with two children and her husband was loaded. Basically, life was solved. Michael seemed to be pursuing his teenage dreams by falling in love with a young girl. Because she was, indeed, a girl. Bella couldn't get it through her head that Michael was willing to leave everything behind to commit himself to a girl who had barely finished high school.

Perhaps in a way, she was a little jealous. Nothing could scare her more than getting old. There had been a couple of nights in which she woke up in the middle of the night because of a nightmare, and Mortimer was always there to pacify her. All the nights spent at the Science Facility were for him, a little expression of his commitment to making his wife happy.

“I just want you to be happy. I can help you with that,” Bella had told her brother. If Mortimer wasn’t around, at least she could help Michael to be with the girl of his dreams. And whether she liked her or not, she had already accepted that Dina would be part of the family, albeit with much resistance. The foolish fear of ceasing to be the woman of the family and giving way to a younger and more beautiful one. Everything was going to be all right if they both drank the elixir of life.

“I don’t like this, Bella,” he expressed after pouring a glass.

“Stop being a coward, Mike.”

“No, seriously, I don’t like this…” Michael started to choke. He felt his insides begin to close up, leaving little room for the green liquid to make its way down his throat. The foul liquid felt like a thick grease boiling, calcining his esophagus and finally landing in his stomach. But that wasn't the worst of it. Just when Michael thought the bitter pill was ready, he began to feel his skin thickening, and his gums stiffening. His nose felt nothing but a sulfur smell, and everything began to spin. His brain was throbbing like it was bubbling blood. “Try to think of something nice. Think of Dina,” said a voice, but he wasn’t sure if it was his or Bella’s.

Finally, after a short blackout, Michael regained his mobility.

“Okay, how do you feel?” said his sister.

“Awful. That’s awful, Bella, how could you possibly drink this? How long have you been doing this?”

“Years. But look at me. I almost look as young as those darn Caliente sisters, don’t you think?”

“Well, I can’t tell if I feel any younger. It may have worked in reverse on me.”

“Yeah, that’s going to happen the first couple of times. You just need to be consistent.”

“Does that mean I have to drink this again?”

“Indeed. Until you make it.” Bella chuckled at Michael’s look of fear. “One day at a time.”

The activity was repeated. Day after day, Michael visited his sister and drank the strange liquid created by his brother-in-law to feel younger. Occasionally, it worked. Sometimes the drink was sweet as ambrosia, and he just wanted to drink more and more of it, only to later visit his beloved Dina. Some other times, the most frequent, the liquid was horrible. Bella told him that it would always be like this, that she was used to it, he would get used to it too.

She even found it amusing. At last, her age and her brother's were approaching the non-existent limbo of being able to put the world on pause and have the youth of their choice, even if they had to pay the consequences later. It wasn't until after the wedding, when Bella and Mortimer's relationship was more strained than ever, that Michael arrived at the Goth Mansion with a somber expression.

"What's going on, Michael?"

“I need the liquid,” he said, devastated.

“What happened?”

“I think Dina is cheating on me,” he said as if at a loss for words.

Bella looked at him in horror, but refrained from saying a thing. Perhaps because, mistakenly, she already knew. She had her suspicions, Mortimer and Dina had been way too close. So much so that he hadn't even noticed that his daughter had started dating a boy and that little Alexander was beginning to stand out at school. "Then take it," she told him, without asking any questions. Take the elixir and drink it, drink all of it. Hadn't she been doing the same thing? Drinking as much of it as she could, to feel younger, less stuck, less of a failure, so that her husband would look at her with desire and not pity as if she were a poor, useless wife in a boring suburb. She wasn't even sure if it was true, but she didn't want to know.

She wouldn’t have been able to bear it. So she watched her brother take the jar, watched him for the last time take home what little was left of Mortimer Goth's worst experiment. Goodbye, Michael Bachelor, goodbye to your divine youth, your friendly smile and your football games. Goodbye to your stupid bride and her stupid sister, both of whom Bella stopped calling immediately after his death. Goodbye to the familiar nature that used to make her feel happy and at home. Without her brother, and with her husband completely thrown into the job, Bella lost what little she had left to keep getting back on her feet day by day. Everyone could notice. Everyone but Don.

Of course, how could he know? How could the wonderful Don know that he had a murderess in front of him? Bella had barely left the house until the night the formidable young man who was dating her daughter kindly invited her to his apartment for a gentle conversation.

“Whenever I look at the stars I think of my parents, I lost them recently. Have you ever felt that way?” the young man asked, getting closer to her.

“I recently lost my brother…” she said, her eyes captivated by the ocean-blue sky.

“Yeah, I heard of it. I’m sorry. He was older than you, wasn’t he?”

“Life is very long when you're lonely,” were the last words she whispered.

--------------------

hello readers! thank you for reading me! I was willing to pull out something for simblreen, so here you go. this is my headcanon of Michael's death, and this short story is part of the same universe as my on-going story Pleasant Valley. Constructive criticism is always accepted 💝

I hope everyone has a fun and spooky halloween! 🎃

#simblreen #ts2 storytelling #prompt #the sims 2 #bella goth #michael bachelor #spooky sims season

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