#is a death sentence. I don’t get it what am I doing wrong that requires me to keep over washing | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mariespen · 2 months

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Who? ˳༄꠶

jealous!Rafe Cameron x fem!Reader ༄꠶ summary: “No way am I sending my girl on a study date with another man." warnings: very very mild sexual concepts, jealous Rafe

based on this request!

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Rafe Cameron was looking right at you with a death glare, the kind of look you’d pin on horrible people who were only doing horrible things. You’d think your boyfriend would understand that being in college requires unavoidable group work, which leads to unavoidable conversations with people you would much rather not know at all. Naturally, you were wrong. Devastatingly wrong.

“I don’t get it.” He said plainly for the fifteenth time that night, “You don’t even need this class if I’m honest.”

You rolled your eyes, trying to focus more on packing your things rather than the hole he was staring into your back.

“Don’t do that shit.. c’mon baby..” Rafe said, getting up to stand closer to you, a persuading hand on your hip, “M’working so hard to give you a life where you don’t gotta work and-“

“Rafe, we’ve talked about this too many times.” You cut him off in hopes to finally shut him up.

“Well why don’t we talk about it again,” He said, a tiny smile on his face, “Like right now? Over dinner?”

“Baby you know that my group members will kill me if I don’t pull through.” You shrugged past him, walking to put your shoes on.

You weren’t wearing anything near special. Sweatpants and one of Rafe’s oversized hoodies were all that you were planning on showing off. But in Rafe’s eyes, HE would fuck you in that, so who’s to say that no one else would? Naturally, he carries a heavy bias considering that Rafe would fuck you in anything, but he says ‘that’s not the point.’

“So what, you’re gonna spend all night with people you don’t even like?” He asked with a scoff.

You gave him an annoyed nod, trying to prove your point.

“That’s gotta be like.. bad for your uh.. mental health. You should stay in.”

“Rafe stop-“ You started before getting a ping on your phone. You groaned to finish the sentence, storming off to get your shoes on.

“What?” Rafe called after you, quietly shuffling behind before picking your phone up and looking at the recent notifications.

Connor: When r u getting here?

“Who’s this?” Rafe asked, pointing to the phone with a look of pure hatred in his eyes.

“One of my group members, love.” You said, trying to stifle a giggle over how protective he was over you.

“Another man? Absolutely not,” He said, turning away from you to block the door out of your shared apartment before continuing his rant, “No way am I sending my girl on a study date with another man. Who do you think-“

You pushed past him, backpack already slung over your shoulders as you made your escape to the front door.

“Nope.” He said plainly, grabbing the back of your bag and making you look at him, his fingers tracing your jaw and holding your eyes to his.

“Rafe..” You whined, but his touch was strict.

“You’re mine, baby. Not Connor’s, a’ight?” He said, brushing hair from your face.

“I’m yours.” You repeated, standing on your tip-toes to give him a kiss on the cheek.

His eyes softened and he thought he got you wrapped around his finger, pulling away to look at your flushed face. Instead, you darted to the door when his touch weakened, hand on the knob before Rafe could get another word in.

“Love you!” You said, closing it before everything caught up to him.

The group work went fine and almost exactly like you thought. A long session and a gut wrenching feeling of exhaustion afterwards. It’s never your favorite event but there were worse things that could happen. Things like walking back into your apartment after narrowly escaping your boyfriend’s possessive hand.

You opened the door quietly, which was already unnecessary. Of course he was still wide awake, waiting for you like a father punishing his daughter for sneaking out. He was sitting on the couch, arms crossed and scowling at you.

“What the fuck?” He asked, getting up to meet you at the front door.

You shoved your shoes off, setting down your backpack and walking closer to Rafe. “M’tired baby..” You said, making every attempt to walk past the intimidating block he made in the hallway.

“No, no no.. this isn’t how it’s gonna work,” Rafe said, using both of his hands to hold your shoulders and forcing you to stand right in front of him as he lowered his voice, “Can’t just do that baby.. a’ight?”

“Sorry..” You whispered, breaking free of his hold on your shoulders and instead pulling yourself into him, wrapping your arms around him in a hug.

You could feel the slightly annoyed laugh that bubbled from him, but you could also feel the chaste kiss that he left on the top of your head. Rafe’s soft spot for you would always shine through his anger. You let yourself melt into his arms while you contemplated falling asleep standing.

“C’mon..” He whispered into you, equally as tired from staying up and waiting for you to come back to him.

You felt him pick you up cautiously, kissing your cheek as you let your eyes start to close.

——————————————————————

The next morning was a beautiful Saturday, which of course was the day you woke up to about 15 messages from your project’s group chat. Somehow you managed to squirm away from Rafe’s death grip over your body to check your phone. Casual conversations relating to different parts of the project and other things that you wanted nothing to do with flashed across the screen.

Over your shoulder you heard Rafe groan and felt him reach for where you weren’t. He looked around for you, watching groggily as you typed out a response on your phone.

“Baby..” He trailed off, rubbing his eyes.

“Sorry.. group project.” You whispered, giving in and letting yourself melt back into his arms.

“At 9 in the morning?” Rafe mumbled into you, an annoyed sigh died in his throat when you ran your fingers through his hair.

Sleep clouded your mind as the two of you held each other close again. He wasn’t trying to show it, but his possessiveness and jealousy were leaking out of him like a faucet.

“G’morning princess..” You heard Rafe whisper from above you, brushing the lazy hair from your cheeks.

You groaned and shifted, trying to find the warmth in the bed now that Rafe had gotten up.

“Let’s get lunch, hm?” He asked, gently moving you to face him again.

You nodded, trying to nod away the urge to dive back under the blankets.

Getting ready wasn’t as hard as you thought it would be, just because Rafe had already bought you the perfect outfit and you didn’t have to fight off your hair as much as you normally did. Whenever you got ready, Rafe would always finish before you and sit on the edge of the bed, admiring your reflection in the bathroom mirror. Your cheeks would flush up and you could never get your blush right anymore because he somehow always had your face a pink shade of red.

Rafe grabbed your bag for you, a small purse that fit your pretty dress. He also went to get your phone from its shameful place at the bedside table because of course you had forgotten to charge it last night.

One text had lit up your screen and his eyes narrowed the moment he saw it was from Connor.

“Baby, why is Connor texting you?” He asked, walking to your spot in the bathroom and shoving the phone in your face to quickly get your attention.

You took the phone, opening the notification while Rafe watched from over your shoulder.

Connor: Hey, I have some ideas for the paper. You want to meet up to talk? I was thinking a Cafe or something.

You could feel the angry red heat of jealousy seeping out of Rafe’s body.

“I told you.” He said, taking the phone from you and staring at the message again, almost dumbfounded at Connor’s audacity.

“M’not going.” You said plainly, looking at him with a lightly apologetic look.

“Damn right you’re not.” He replied, throwing your phone onto the bed and looking at you with an angry glare staring down at your face.

You watched an idea form in his head. It was easily not anything good considering the way his lips turned up in a thin smile and his gaze moved between you and the phone in a heartbeat.

“Y’know.. I really don’t want my girl missn’ anything..” He trailed off, walking to where he threw your phone originally.

“Rafe..” You tried to protest, not fully understanding where his head was at.

“No.. I think I gotta be a good boyfriend here.” He nodded to himself before looking at you with an unforgettable smirk.

“Baby I don’t want to go.” You said, walking up to him and trying to read his cocky expression.

“You, go?” He asked with faux confusion, cocking his head to the side, “No no, you’ve got it all wrong.”

Rafe stood up, taking your hands in his and kissing your knuckles before looking back down at you. Now it was your turn to be confused, furrowing your eyebrows.

“You think I’m stupid, baby?” He mocks, kissing your up jaw and stopping by your ear, “M’gonna go in for you.”

Whatever hint of a smile you had on your face slowly disappeared as realization dawned on you.

“I think I’ll text him right now and let him know I’m on my way. Give him a nice surprise when he realizes it’s not the pretty little girl that he wants.” Rafe said slyly, pulling back with a malicious smile.

“Then he and I can really talk, hm?”

The next day, Connor dropped the class.

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receival · 23 days

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castlevania, season 2 starters.

the following is a collection of sentence starters from the netflix original, castlevania.

i’m going to get something for your cough.

don’t move. i’ll be right back with some medicine.

i hate that you’re not here, every day.

i’m amazed any of you are still alive.

what do you need? tell me, i’ll give it to you.

i will not be silenced. just let me help!

please, you don’t know what you’re doing.

you don’t know what you’re going to bring upon yourself if you harm me.

i’ll leave. you’ll never see me again.

stand up like a man.

what the hell was that?

you can’t hate livestock. they are simply what they are.

you understand why they all must die.

the matter is closed.

you sicken me. do you understand?

stop whining about cruelty. this is the world.

only the death matters now.

and i’m standing here sad and angry because they’re together, and i’m alone.

this is the part where you’re supposed to tell me i’m not alone, (name).

you are really very not good at this.

i learned to travel alone early in life. maybe i just got too used to it.

you had a family, though?

i know a little bit about what you’re feeling. i’m sorry.

i was right about you the first time, you know. you are rude.

i’ve been called worse.

i actually came to apologize for my outburst.

i should have held my tongue, so i apologize.

i’m a nice person. i am. i know how to be nice!

so, how do we proceed?

i want to go home.

have you been drinking again?

i was under the impression it was destroyed.

you’re guessing though.

fortunate, then, that i chose not to kill and eat you, (name).

such a merry band we are.

eat shit and die.

yes, fuck you.

i’ll be honest with you. i don’t have a better idea.

i’m trusting you, (name). don’t make me regret it.

everybody regrets it in the end.

you will cease this infantile squabbling.

and what insights have you, (name)?

i will speak with you alone.

i suspect he still wants to sleep with me.

what advantage does my anger buy you?

i’m still not completely clear on why you don’t catch fire in the daylight.

god, you still think you’re funny.

he’s gone mad, and from that, there’s no recovering him.

oh, the world will still be here, (name). trees will still grow, birds will still sing, animals will still hump away in the undergrowth. but you won’t be here. none of you.

the sun will still set, but you will not see it rise.

you hear that?

no further.

what did you think you were gonna learn?

please don’t be angry with me anymore.

even after everything in your life, you’re still a sweet boy who believes in love.

i’m sorry. i just wanted to help.

i love you too. that’s why i do this. this is how i love you.

you stop fucking around, you do as you’re told, you never use the word ‘love’ again.

no such thing as love in this world.

[why do you do that?] / choosing my own actions and injuring myself to a world of horrors.

you struggled so hard to come back home.

you came home regardless.

do you really think that’s enough, (name)?

your intellect cannot be denied.

i believe you are actually worried about (name).

the fire in him has gone out somehow. it’s as if we’re looking at the embers of the man.

there are things we can do that don’t require his decisions.

why are you so fascinated by that?

we need to ensure it does not fall into the wrong hands.

is it you?

tell me what you need.

they must be stopped. culled.

my fellow humans have never treated me with love, and i’ve punished them for it.

i wouldn’t have them suffer.

will you join me?

it’s hard to imagine you playing.

his was your home?

you grew up here?

wasn’t the worst way to grow up.

who remembers that sort of thing?

is there a point to these questions?

i’m disturbed to find that o had more of a childhood than you did.

just help me clear it.

i didn’t know it was a fucking magic door.

are you coming or what?

my family. all that’s left of us.

bloody hell. is that what i think it is?

careful, (name). you almost sounded excited about something.

it couldn’t be. could it?

what on earth is that ugly thing.

you’re not even a little bit impressed?

may i speak to you?

are you going to continue questioning me?

get out before i slit you up the middle and bite out your heart.

this isn’t a war, (name). it’s a suicide.

i’m not gonna fuck you, (name). i’m too pissed off.

you stupid bastard.

what the hell was that for?

no, no, no, that’s not fair.

just tell me what it is.

you’re a cockwart, (name).

you are an adult. you do not have to rise to his every barb.

he’s pissing me off like it’s his job, (name).

i just want to do my work, (name).

you don’t say something like that out loud in this place!

say the words. so that i know you are still my friend.

you saved me. the only person in the world who ever lifted a hand to protect me from anything.

you are still my friend.

i have no fear of death. it always sounded peaceful to me.

i will be loyal to the end — and beyond.

they will never see us coming, and fuck them if they do.

no one has a right to your true beliefs.

you’ve given me purpose, and treated me with respect. a lie wouldn’t change that.

you don’t owe anybody anything.

i believe you are the only one who grasps the necessity of it all.

are you still my friend?

are you okay?

tired. a … bit lonely.

my dusty old sheet is big enough for two.

i’m not sad.

i wish you would stop doing that. it’s sick.

you would betray (name)?

it’s not betrayal unless the old man decides to be difficult about it.

thank you for showing me the truth.

my work here is almost done.

the end of this will be practically merciful.

i am also concerned that you enjoy him too much.

am i not working hard enough?

you’re afraid. you worry that you might have made the wrong choice.

perhaps you’re just an angry teenager in an adults body.

i don’t think i’ve heard you tell a joke before.

(name), you are a marvel.

you have caused this to happen. be proud.

i admire your resolve.

but those times are long gone.

i no longer have the strength for these petty decisions.

that’s all that matters. they all have to die.

do you know why i had to do it?

when i say ‘what’, that doesn’t mean i’d like to ask even more questions.

would you please — oh, you are the most annoying — just stop!

see? god hates me!

are you asking my advice?

so long as it brings silence.

well, i’m armed with a … a stick. so i’ll understand if you want to run away now.

you have nothing left but me.

you did it, (name).

i’m pretty good, right?

you’re the best.

they will not reach you while i live.

you would give your mortal life to preserve my immortal one?

you have a soul, i think.

perhaps you simple deserve a better fate than to die instead of me.

i choose my death, as i chose my life.

i told you before, i won’t let you do it.

i grieve with you … but i won’t let you do this.

you couldn’t stop me before.

i am no ordinary vampire to be killed by your human magics.

you didn’t kill me before. you’re not going to kill me now.

you want this to end as much as i do.

this entire catastrophe has been nothing but history’s longest suicide note.

not quite close enough.

my boy. i’m — i’m killing my boy.

i must already be dead.

(name), step back. let me finish this.

you’ve saved countless lives. but it’s alright to mourn the man, too.

he died a long time ago.

what do you think he’s going to do now?

i do not break things.

you’re giving me your home?

protect it. make something out of it.

keep moving. i’m not in the mood.

what do we have here?

is that really the best you have?

i simply don’t have time to deal with shit like you every time i want to sit and take a drink.

why would i want to stop now?

how on earth did you come to that decision?

this is the closest thing i’ve had to a life in … i don’t know when.

you’re the closest i’ve had to a friend.

so they’re barricading their homes and sharpening their stakes? that’s fair. can’t say i blame them.

you won’t stake me to death with that, (name).

where will you go?

i’ve been thinking about it all day. i still don’t understand.

(name) is dead. does that trouble you?

poor (name). stand up for me.

don’t worry. we’ll look after you.

(name) — what are you doing?

go to hell!

you are my pet now.

be well, my friend.

don’t let that idiot get you into too much trouble.

is this what i’ve got to look forward to?

#rp sentence starters #rp sentence meme #rp ask meme #rp prompts #roleplay memes #sentence starter meme #sentence starters #ask memes #ask prompt

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reborrowing · 3 months

Text

that alien thing I was thinking about. I don't usually do epistolary writing, but this gets the point across without spilling all the alien details so I can come back tell the rest from a more normal human POV if I want to come back to it.

~550 words

cw: dehumanization, alien abduction, corporate fuckery

Trash > Observational Lab NS02 Notes!

Timestamped 683800:1101

Looks like the lab will be seeing some use sooner than we thought. Pamza had their crew charting an unoccupied system near the Eysina jump and found an active biosphere in the middle of it. A probe didn’t detect any sort of faelar or other artificial networks or anything that would suggest any kind of civilization, so they’re sending the field team to touch down and see about getting us some wildlife samples.

In the meantime, I get to recalibrate allllll our containment tanks because somehow no one anticipated the exact conditions required to house some random xeno-bugs.

Timestamped 683810:1352

So the new alien things are fuzzy and actually kind of cute! I figured the field guys would just find a couple of 'pod things, those awkward things that evolve early in a planet’s life cycle.

But I overheard someone saying the sponsor’s pleased, some of these things might even be marketable? Not my concern I guess, but the labs are full and I am busy!

Timestamped 683809:1112

Some of these species should not have been housed together. Zoc is pissed at the field guys. Me too, after spending all afternoon cleaning out that tank. These things are um, tightly packed under all that fur.

I watched Zoc do an exploratory xenonecropsy which was…not something I was expecting to get out of this apprenticeship. I don’t know how I feel about it. It’s good experience, probably? But I think I prefer to work with living things.

Timestamped 683811:1089

Some of these things are smart for their size! I guess they’re probably not small relatively and life on their planet found some way to cope with the size limitations, but it’s still weird to see. They're pretty social too. I think some of them have started recognizing different lab members.

There’s this one that I think even likes me. It’s kind of a stabby little thing, hand-sized, fluffy. It trots right up to my hand when open the tank and climbs up to my crest to sleep while I sit down to prep instruments for later. It’s adorable. If the Sponsor does send a team back to that planet, I’ll probably buy one of my own once they’re available

Timestamped 683822:4011 [recovered file]

Something happened in the lab today. I don’t think anyone else saw. I was cycling some water for the twoleggers, one of them almost got out and—I don’t know. I don’t think basic animal intelligence would have thought to do that. But we don’t have any kind of ambassadors on board, never mind the specialists needed for first contact and translating and…oh.

I probably just misinterpreted what I saw. Maybe I just need to review my xenocognition theory. I’m wrong. I'm sure of it. I’m just an apprentice. I don't know things.

Timestamped 683822:4043 [recovered file]

I can’t remember if they monitor search queries. I bet they can do that. It’s their ship. Their tech. I tried to figure out what I'm supposed to do if I think we accidentally found alien life that's...Can they see these files? fuck.

Timestamped 683827:4121 [recovered file]

It knows. The little twolegger knows I know, it knows and I don’t know how to tell it that I can’t do anything for it without sentencing it to death. It's going to hurt itself. Or someone else is going to notice if it keeps trying to prove itself and then they'll sentence it to death.

I have to make it stop.

#the timestamps are basically meaningless don't read into them lol #g/t #g/t writing #my writing #not sure if i will come back to this because i dont have any Plot Solutions #but i do have some interaction Thoughts #and wrote this up last night bc i kept coming back to it #amwt

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nateriverswife · 11 months

Note

In all honesty, I doubt that L would use the Death Note with the same intention as Light Yagami, or would've even used it at all. He would've read out the entire rule of the Death Note, ask a few questions and figure out a few loopholes he can exploit before going, "That's... so boring???".

L, to me, is the sort of person who doesn't give two shits of the criminal whom he apprehended. He had fun tackling the case, got his pay and let the government do their jobs in the aftermath. At the very least, he wouldn't want said criminal to roam the streets freely— as long as they're somewhere not amongst the civillian, then L fails to see why bother using the Death Note at all.

It's kind of funny when people said, "L would've joined Light had given the chance and eradicate the world off evil" because that would've contradicted L's whole character— and that being having the time of his life solving the unsolvable. What kind of entertainment is there if he just sits in front of his silly laptop, reading off solved cases just to write down the criminal's name and attend meetings with world leader? Sounds boring to me. L would've sentenced himself immediately.

I thought I didn’t have much to say about this, because I agree with it, but if you are the person who sent the previous asks or has read the others, you should know that I cannot for the love of God stop myself from writing. I recommend a drink and a snack, by the way.

I just want to preface this by saying that I did write a post about it, and if you are interested, check it out. It’s not long nor elaborated as these answers I give, but it sums up my opinion and it’s more about the “what if” L grabbed the death note before Light.

I don’t know in which post I wrote that I also think using the death note would take away the challenge he gains from solving crimes, but that’s another of my arguments as to why he wouldn’t use it.

Now, the post will focus on the reasons you provided and the opinions I found in the fandom that would contradict the idea of him being similar to Light in this regard.

[I wrote this after I finished the post.] Before I start, and I’ll talk about this thoroughly: the line between suspects and criminals is slim, and L deals mainly with the first ones. It’s important to remember this, while reading my post, because, while the ask talks about criminals, we have to keep in mind L’s actual job. So, consequently, it might be off topic in some parts, and this is the reason. Another thing is that I consider different situations L might find himself in. I tried to explain the details as much as I could, but there might be some variables that I did not disclose properly. Hopefully, they can be understood by the context.

PREMISE:

In the “I am not justice” speech L gave at the Wammy’s House, even if I think most of it was bait, I do still believe there is some truth to it, because I am not one to point the finger at L and criticise the fact that he does what he does because he likes it.

Work and pleasure can go hand in hand, and hopefully it can also be possible in this universe soon.

At the end of the day, L still solves crimes, still catches criminals, still provides “justice”, no matter what his main goal is here, which can also be getting a kick of serotonin by being challenged. There’s nothing wrong with it, as long as he does what his role requires him to, so it's one thing that I don't get about the fandom or those who think it is wrong.

Do you want him to hate what he does? Don’t you think that would make him more prone to take the short route out and detain suspects without any reason, until they confess? Or just straight up kill them and see if the crimes stop? Which, interestingly enough, I wrote a post about how L saving Misa caused his death, to prove that sometimes winning is not the only thing on his mind, but he wants to understand cases on a more nuanced level.

But the point is, this kind of people have no problem saying that L doesn’t care about others, that his ultimate goal is to entertain himself (and to win) and in the same breath, they continue by stating that he would use the death note in a blink of an eye with the same moral justification as Light, so… Does he or does he not care about the world? Why does he solve crimes? For entertainment purposes or to “get rid of the evil and save the world”?

To me, it’s both (kind of), so it would make sense that he wouldn’t use it.

REASONS: - one by one.

First and foremost, his role in the world and his responsibility of what happens to criminals after they get caught.

There’s a tendency to confuse private detective work with the criminal justice system and law enforcement.

I came across some posts a while back, when I used to dive in his hashtag, and people would read his work in a light that is not applicable to him, and I think it’s because he works with the task force.

L is a high-profile private detective, and like any other, he doesn’t have the ability to arrest nor sentence criminals.

Yes, he says that he will bring Kira’s head to the task force, but it’s a figure of speech and it only means that he will find enough proof to catch him (and I also think it was such a badass move to say it in front of Light, but I digress).

You could argue that some of his tactics aren’t legal, so he could possibly be the one to administrate “justice” (in quotes, because the death penalty is not it to me), but this is different.

If he wires the house of someone and gets proof that they committed the crime, let’s be honest, given his status and the probability of law enforcement or national agencies/government already knowing how he operates, he will get a slap on the wrist, but deciding the fate of a criminal or a suspect is overstepping his already non-existent authority in that field.

He would lose trust, which he cares a lot about. He wouldn’t be able to work with the support of the national law enforcement, which he needs because he is a private detective that countries need to employ, and nobody would do that, if he cannot respect them. It would also put him in danger of his identity being discovered, because that is a patently crime, which would get him blacklisted from working in a country and make him a wanted criminal.

"But he wouldn't be caught. Nobody would know."

Even if he uses the most intricate way to kill his suspects, one time is a coincidence, two times is weird, and three times shows that something fishy is going on. He seems to communicate his progress to high profile people, like the FBI header (we can see that at the beginning of the manga), so going from “yeah, I have suspect” to “they died” continuously would literally point every possible finger in his direction. He cannot afford that, not even if he wanted to do it. We are told and we say that he is smart, so why would he do something so stupid?

It would also be weird if all the criminals he caught were to be killed, so he would need to avoid patterns, which would definitely take him a lot of time and planning and would steal it from his actual activity, that he loves.

Besides, if he manages to kill enough people to raise some eyebrows but they are not linked to him, countries will ask him to do something about it and if he refuses, that's fucking weird, because that's the type of case he is interested in. If he accepts it, but it takes him too much time without any justifcation, weird. If he denies the help offered by national agencies, weird. If he accepts it, but does things that don't make sense and don't actual help the case, weird. Countries will start to think that he cannot be trusted, which goes back to what I said before. It's a circle that he cannot escape. And he is not the only smart person in the world. Someone will notice that something is wrong, that that is not the way he usually acts, and people will start to question his integrity.

But going back to the beginning, since he has no authority after he provides proof, I honestly believe the thought of him deciding the sentence of a criminal has never crossed his mind, because he has no reason to spend time over that. He cannot do anything. Maybe he has a wish but that is it. Nothing he can act upon, so it’s useless. He also came across so many criminals (10.500) and surely, he had no time to individually think about each one of them, so he just stopped doing that. By the way, he works on multiple cases at once, so why would he waste time over their fate, after he caught them, when he can continue to occupy it with more interesting and fun mind games?

So, yeah, he doesn’t give a shit in this sense. If his saying was required, maybe yes, but even then, he wouldn’t follow the criminal proceedings closely.

Anyway, I am not even sure what his opinion on the death penalty is, to be honest, because him using a criminal that was on the death row doesn’t immediately mean that he is in favour of it, and the fact that he was willing to get one of them out of that situation makes me incline to believe that he is not. In Lind L. Taylor, he just used what was already in place. So, if he isn't, obviously he won't use the death note by default.

The fun of solving a crime.

He loves it. You wouldn't ever guessed it, right? It's not as if his character is mainly based on this.

But seriously.

Considering the in-universe tale of what Light managed to do, it says that the crimes have dropped significantly. How can you possibly believe that L would love to be in a world in which his favourite pastime is useless?

I won’t get into math to calculate exactly how long it would take him, because the stats we have are not accurate. I tried to do it but there are so many variables that would change everything (e.g. when he actually started to work), but it’s safe to assume 20 years – or less –, because he still needs to find suspects but if he wants to use the death note on them, he doesn’t need to convince anyone but himself that they are the criminals, so as soon as he is convinced, he can proceed and then move on. He can also work on many more cases than just almost 2 a day. He can take on a lot of them, even five, if he feels like it, because the time for each one would be minimal.

And I think this is something people fail to consider when saying that he would use the death note, because what would his criteria be for choosing who to kill? Or when to kill them? If they are arrested and convicted, what’s the point of doing it? What would he achieve? Nothing, so you have to think he would do it when they are only just suspects, but he is confident enough that they are the one. The question remains: when would that be? L is quick to find a suspect and be convinced that they are guilty. Basically, for most of the easier cases, he would need less than a day. So, I’m going to believe that the people supporting this idea imply this, which is so contradictory to his character.

If you say that he would do what Light did, as I said, it makes even less sense. Other than the fact that he goes against Kira for this reason, that’s not his job nor his goal.

As you said, “What kind of entertainment is there if he just sits in front of his silly laptop, reading off solved cases just to write down the criminal's name and attend meetings with world leader?”.

Key word “solved”. I am repeating myself, but once it’s solved, why would L care? Unless he is personally invested in the criminals because they are connected to his past, or the case is related to a future one, he would literally move on. I cannot even force myself to conjure a reason other than these two, because there is not.

“But it’s Light.”

Yeah, that’s another reason why L doesn’t give a fuck. Who is Light to him exactly, realistically? No one but a suspect, which he is highly convinced that is Kira.

I am sorry, but if your whole reading of a character is through the lenses of a ship that is not even canon or probable to be canon, since Ohba is homophobic and would never do something like that, then I don’t know what to tell you, but I find it a bit embarrassing.

L is an independent character. Just like Light is.

Maybe – in-universe and without considering Ohba – I am at fault for failing to realise this attachment they might have for one another. Probably, I have this rigid way to look at Death Note in general, that does not allow me to consider L’s activity more than a case that he tries to solve, while gaining a bit of excitement out of it, especially after considering that it’s shown to us in the yotsuba arc that L cared only about Kira, not Light, because he found them entertaining and challenging, not because he liked Light.

I know it’s fiction, okay? Doesn’t have to be realistic. It can be silly and yada yada yada. I look at these posts and giggle at the “so obsessed with each other”, the whole university sees these men playing tennis and disappearing, etc. and I think it’s funny. I see the irony. That is a joke, but then I read posts that try to prove through canon that L was in love with Light or meta-analysis about him, butchering his character just for that or reducing him just to that, for a bit of gay love with the most republican looking guy ever (I mean, fair but, yk), and I wonder what I am missing, what piece of this puzzle I lost along the way, and I cannot find it.

[Tangent: And then I cannot even enjoy most of the fanfics in this fandom for the same reason. I feel like I am not in on the joke.

That’s why I also prefer L x Matsuda or L x Naomi, even though I don't ship them. People who do, at least, don’t change his personality, his morals and so on. In Matsuda’s case, it’s just a change of attitude, which is possible and easier. When I used to read L/Light fics, people would often either make L OOC or change Light completely, so that things could work. In canon, Light is no one outside of Kira, and L would have zero interest in a 17/18-year-old boy that is just smart. Also, L can find other idiots with the same intellect as him, that are not murderers and are far more entertaining. Did L ever say that Light is the only one who understands his mind or reach his level? I don’t remember it, so where does this belief come from? To be honest, I don’t even really like when people reduce characters to their intelligence. A person is more than their mind.

And I am glad to have found a small following/a group of mutuals that are like me in this regard, because the reason why I left the fandom years ago was also due to the inability to enjoy any content because it would always have L/Light slapped on it lmao (since the characters in the second half were not really considered).

Some people who ship them follow me, which is cool to see because it means they are not here expecting that, but for some unknown reason. I don’t usually go on a rampage about them – what I said here was very mild and I think bearable – so that’s maybe why they don’t mind being here, so yeah, that’s nice. There also people who like Light, and I despise him, so that’s also sweet, but it also means that I am not hating on him enough. I might compensate for that (jk)].

Killing people as a detective.

Don’t feel like I need to explain how this is just stupid. He uses some very morally grey tactics, but killing is a bit too far.

I wrote a post about how I think L wouldn’t work with Light, even if he caught him, because I honestly doubt L would want to be associated with someone who kills people, let alone be the one to do the killing. It just doesn’t feel in character, like at all. Not only it’s a shallow way to deal with criminals, he wouldn’t gain anything and if he does it long enough, his job will be useless, but why would a detective engage into that, also to that extent? It makes no sense, and, as I said, it’s not his focus.

A detective that kills people is contradictory. It is cool, not going to lie, but L is not that type of character.

I saw a comic a while ago in which L and Light joined forces, and L was the one using the death note to kill corrupted politicians. That would never happen. Not only because he wouldn’t kill criminals or join Light, but he doesn’t care that much, unless it hinders his job. And, even in that case, he would not end their life, but manipulate them to give him what he wants or persuade them to act in a way that is beneficial to him.

Neither of them is that righteous. I don’t believe Light actually cared about the world that much. His speech at the end was just to cover up that he was having fun with the power he held. Just a moral justification. I tried to write a post how him being smart, his supposed interest in this matter and his black and white view of the world don't make sense to me if he actually cared, but I was writing it in my tumblr drafts, and it got deleted. Now, it’s uncompleted in my notes, and I have no motivation to finish it. Nice.

Far-sighted.

As I was writing the paragraph above the last one, there's another thing that is different between Light and L and that is to be taken into consideration: how far-sighted they are.

I will use as an example how they manipulate.

In this post (long ask about characters in general), I talked about the Aizawa’s gateway to explain how L does it. Long story short, he convinces his target to act in a certain way, withholding information that the other person would need to know to change their mind.

He doesn’t do it with the intention to get something and then get rid of them, as Light does.

Besides Misa, who was protected by Rem, and other people, like the task force, that if dead would show that he’s Kira, Light manipulated people to gain something and killed them, because he could not see a long-term relation forming between them, probably due to the fact that he was scared that they might either try to overthrown him, hinder his work or find out who he is (although he does really get a sick pleasure by telling people he is Kira, after condemning them to death). Even in Raye’s case, he could’ve continued to threaten him and use him to kill any FBI agent that might come after him. He could’ve done so much with that one federal agent, but he just tossed him in the trash.

L is not like this. L can see himself working with same people he manipulated for a long period of time. He does not see it as an irreversible act, because other than his identity, he doesn’t have much else to hide, and he doesn’t always do something criminous. He can even create a mutually beneficial partnership.

He is far-sighted. He might think that a criminal he caught could be useful in the future. Imagine if he has a case that connects him to one he already solved and he needs any input he can get from the person responsible for that, I believe he will make a deal or manipulate them to get that information. So, using the death note and killing his possible future assets is such a self-sabotaging move, in my opinion.

What he would do with the death note.

As I wrote in the post hyperlinked at the beginning, he would study it, make Watari and himself remember the rules even without owning the death note and either give it back to the Shinigami, after getting as much as possible information about them too, or lock it up somewhere safe. It would depend on if the Shinigami is someone like Ryuk.

Either way, he would realise how destructive it is and would know not to engage with it.

Will he want to prove its authenticity? I don’t know.

He might ask the Shinigami, “how many death notes are dropped on average on the earth?” and from the answer, which – before Light – is zero, and after returning the death note to them, he might just decide to wait to see it happen without his intervention, because it’s not an urgent matter, so if it happens, he knows how to act, and if it doesn’t, it’s better.

I don’t think he’s that interested in the death note itself. In the Kira case, it was crucial to the investigation, but in a normal day in his life, seeing it actually work could lead him to have some thoughts he might not otherwise have, and that could possible spiral down to testing each rule. He would realise that, and I think he would take the Shinigami’s words at face value, considering that he just met a fucking Shinigami so that must mean that it has a high chance of working, and leave it alone.

If he had been that eager to test it, he would’t have shared his plan with the task force, as to get their approval, and would’ve done it in secret, getting back to them with just the results. It would’ve saved his life, to be honest, because Rem wouldn't have known about that and what would’ve meant for Misa. Or maybe not, because she might’ve just killed him once everything was done and while he was presenting everything. In any case, it shows not only cooperation but also a sense of hesitance on his part.

Going to the scenario of him getting the death note before Light, he would also hope that it doesn’t become a mainstream thing, because that would, like you said, make everything so boring for him, like, “get creative, I know how you are doing it”. A bit like what Near did in the 2013 one shot.

My rambling ends here, and now, I am thinking about L begging criminals to be a little bit more fun to catch, ‘cause they are making him die of boredom, and he can’t do it anymore, he’s losing his mind. And if they continue like this, they could actually defeat him. And all the leaders in the world being like, "bitch, what are you doing?? Don't encourage them!"

But yeah. That’s more or less what I had to say on the topic. I kind of get the feeling that I am leaving something out, so that might make this a “to be continued” post, depending on any external input I might get.

Hope you liked this answer. It’s quite long. Almost 4k words, but it was stimulating, to say the least. I love when I find these type of messages in my inbox, because they make me think lol

That’s all.

#thanks for the input!!#death note #l lawliet #light yagami #dn.inbox #as always hopefully my english is understandable #i feel like i know who you might be tbh #but even if i'm wrong - i still adore you #dn.general #dn.L #meta analysis #death note meta

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stardustprompts · 2 years

Text

the diviners - libby bray sentence starters change tenses/pronouns as needed !! some lines have been edited for clarity / length / ease of roleplaying tw : death , alcohol mention , language

‘they say it’s still haunted by restless spirits.’

‘I’ll keep you safe.’

‘I will teach you fear.’

‘I will not apologize! I told the truth.’

‘did I tell you that I have special powers?’

‘you don’t mind being seen with the town pariah?’

‘you with your keen observations—- what, exactly, do you find so special about me?’

‘I am exercising my individualism.’

‘you can call me anything—- just not before noon.’

‘it’s like a party without any confetti.’

‘sometimes you might hear odd sounds in the night. but you mustn’t be frightened.’

‘dead bodies are such trouble.’

‘well. It’s a regular mystery, I guess. where’s agatha christie when you need her?’

‘I thought I saw someone watching us. I must’ve been mistaken.’

‘could you please remind me why we’re friends?’

‘life don’t come to you, (name). you’ve gotta take it.’

‘not interested in making pals. I already got a best pal.’

‘I never forget a favor. you know that.’

‘i’m on to you, pal. you so much as whistle off-key and I promise I will personally give you the bum’s rush.’

‘absence makes the heart grow fonder. let’s put that phrase to the test, shall we?’

‘you must be willing to risk in order to be rewarded.’

‘I am never drinking again.’

‘you should know by now that I never do what I’m supposed to do.’

‘idealism is just an escape from reality. there is no utopia.’

‘you might change the world, (name).’

‘we’re not safe, you know. not at all.’

‘ain’t that just the way of the world, now? good luck turns bad. bad luck turns good. just a big rolling craps game played between this world and the next, and we’re the dice getting tossed around.’

‘get some rest. live to fight another day.’

‘maybe you don’t know me as well as you think you do.’

‘a man’s gotta believe in something.’

‘me? I’m the farthest thing from trouble you’ll ever know.’

‘the worst part is the feeling. like something terrible is coming. something I don’t want to see.’

‘I don’t wear worry.’

‘you’re so selfish sometimes! it’s all a game to you—- and you want to rig it in your favor all the time, and damn what anybody else wants.’

‘people always fear what they don’t understand.’

‘you’re supposed to marry for money, not love.’

‘there was just something about him, like I’d known him my whole life.’

‘now you’re starting to make me jealous.’

‘you’re a lot more like me than you think, (name).’

‘what I meant to say is, you like me a lot more than you think.’

‘i’m afraid I’ll have to kill you now. be a honey and sit still while I strangle you.’

‘I can’t imagine anyone ever leaving you.’

‘there are times when one friend requires the blind faith of another. this is such a time.’

‘when have I ever steered you wrong?’

‘it’s just that … you’re not what I thought.’

‘there’s nothing wrong with you. I just want you to know that.’

‘what good is it to have this power and not use it?’

‘it’s best to let the dead lie in peace.’

‘people tend to think hate is the most dangerous emotion. but love is equally dangerous.’

‘i’m not letting you out of my sight.’

‘people will believe anything if it means they can go on with their lives and not have to think too hard about it.’

‘will you get down before you kill yourself?’

‘one day, (name), you’re gonna fall head over heels for me!’

‘all this time, I thought I was alone. different. but you’re different, too.’

#sentence starters #rp memes #rp sentence starters #rp prompts #literature prompts #literature sentence starters #the diviners sentence starters #the diviners prompts #period prompts #1920s prompts

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candyredmusings · 2 years

Text

Grubba Gang Sentence Starters

aka shit my discord squad has said. Periodically updated.

Mostly crack + NSFT.

“STOP BEING HORNY!”

“I’M NOT BEING HORNY STOP GASLIGHTING ME!”

“Santa isn’t real and Jesus never happened.”

“CLEAR YOUR SCHEDULE BABY WE’RE GOING TO YANDERE DIVORCE COURT.”

“I’ll be having evil intercourse.”

“I prostate myself jingling miserably on the floor for nothing.”

“God I would stab a man for a dorito.”

“How many people have you put in Jigsaw traps? I’m not a cop by the way.”

“Wish my mans would call me Slupert Doobert.”

“THANKS! I’M GOING TO SMITE YOU FOR YOUR HUBRIS NOW!”

“Shut the fuck up none of you can truly understand barbie horse adventures mystery ride.”

“Bold of you to presume we talk about anything except getting nut in here.”

“ALL I WANTED WAS TO GET RAWED ON THE FIRST DATE AND YOU SAID NO LIKE SOME FUCKING GENTLEMAN-”

“My vore gets me bitches.”

“ [Name] we’re gonna watch the barbie movies and im gonna sell my nudes.”

“I don’t know about you but Santa Claus could SMASH.”

“Just kidding. I want to pull you apart like a twizzler.”

“Sometimes I crave that real flesh.”

“One minute you’re talking about nutting the next you’re talking about when you were 6 year olds and first learned the feeling of betrayal.”

“Gnomes WILL be held accountable for their crimes.”

“ Tsk. No cloaca. No meaning.”

“Are you gonna eat your girls pussy like some sort of democrat, or vore her like a man?”

“ I am the clown that entertains this nuclear wasteland of comedy.”

“Are you thinking about the gnome party?”

“[NAME] if there’s ONE thing i know about you it’s that you don’t wear pants unless absolutely necessary.”

“Damn. It was never as easy as blues clues made it seem!”

“I’m going to fucking cain and abel you.”

“IM REQUIRED BY LAW TO SUCK HIS DICK NOW-”

“Your ass is grass and I’m an ape.”

“Hey anyone wanna fuck.”

“Not to flex on you but im something of a manlet.”

“I’m on a sexual clown journey.”

“Post the image, you stupid fruit.”

“God I gotta say I do love being me sometimes? Because I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with me.”

“It’ll be fine. Ain’t you ever seen Hamilton?”

“Can we stop talking about my asshole?”

“It has been 2 days since our last slur.” / “it’s been 0 days since our last slur.”

“I’m ‘bout to be real with you, chief, I’m bout to bust them fucking kneecaps.”

“Will my life ever know peace?”

“Let’s just say if I had to see [NAME] in a police line up, well, I hope they can’t see through the mirror.”

“Let’s just say if I had to see Mr. Blobby in a police line up, well, I hope they can’t see through the mirror.”

“What the absolute FUCK have I walked into.”

“[NAME] comes within five feet of my pussy and I have to beat them away with a pool noodle.”

“I want cock. Now.”

“Shut the fuck up [NAME] there’s girls here!”

“IS [NAME] IN HEAT?”

“WE’VE BEEN ARGUING OVER [NAME]’S FEET FOR THREE DAYS.”

“Yes, love of my life? My Pizza Hut pan pizza? My 2 for 4 deal?“

“I’m probably gonna get hate for this, but, [NAME] is an absolute snacc.”

“You’re right. You are going to get hate.”

“For the love of God shut the fuck up.”

“In the past 24 hours you have said several horrible things to me.”

“I also want to see fat demon cock.”

“Gra ta ta swag bitch.”

“I’M HERE TO GET SEXUAL.”

“Please don’t call [NAME] sexy ever again.”

“Shut up, fruit.”

“GOD IS MY BITCH AND HE SUCKED MY DICK BEHIND A 7/11.”

“[NAME] I love you but what are you doing man?”

“Eat or I’ll send Steve Harvey after you.”

“I wanna be rammed so hard my anal cavity prolapses.”

“[NAME] if it was life or death would you yank the dildo outta my ass?”

“What’s the lore behind a dildo being in your ass and someone will die of circumstances because of it?”

“ NO!! THE POPE CANT BE HORNY!!”

“Don’t get me wrong, Lola bunny could take a jack hammer to my nuts and I’d thank her, but she also is the best basketball player ever.”

“[NAME]’s exquisite boobs will not protect him from feral [NAME] and that is a promise!”

“whats a little cum inflation among friends”

“On fridays we gaslight our white boys for enrichment.”

“Ain’t that the shit the lucky charms dude says? If you wanna find the fruit you gotta suck-o me nut? …or maybe thats fruit loops.“

"He’s shown feet, the next logical step is ass"

“[NAME] I got money on you crying right now. Not to freak you out, but -”

“I have RED VELVET in my BIG ASS TITTIES”

"Give this child a prison uniform I’m tired of him."

"Theres only so much i can do to stop white people"

“I DON’T CARE ABOUT SQUIRTING [NAME]”

"I LOVE ARGUING WITH MEN OVER THE INTERNET. MY PORES ARE CLEAR."

“I died in a tragic lip gloss accident and only by the grace of god do i live on.”

“You will never match his swag.”

“Hannibal is always based?”

“You know who else eats people? Christians. Grow up.”

“He’s gender-nonconforming as fuck with those eyelashses"

“I just fucked yo’ bitch in my Gucci clown drip.”

“She is to marry what we in the business call a little fucking freak.”

“TRY GETTING A JOB AT SCOOPS AHOY NOW YOU LITTLE FUCKING BASTARD!”

“The goal of art is to piss off as many people as possible.”

“I don’t know why I do the things I do, [NAME].”

"YOU HAVE THE GALL. TO COMPARE BEETHOVEN TO THE FUCKING BEATLES?!?"

“ I got heckled to sing Rainbow Connection."

“Do I make you horny, baby?”

“ WOW I GET IT! YOU’RE A WHORE I SEE NOW!”

“Wow, he looks like shit. I could suck him silly.”

“I could suck him silly.”

“Mommy? Sorry. Mommy? Sorry. Mommy? Sorry. Mommy? Sorry.”

"I could change jfk… WAIT AM I MARILYN MONROE?"

“Im so used to jumping in front of the gun that i didn’t realize the gun wasn’t loaded.”

“ this guy is like PG13 Hannibal. “

“you met me at a very frank floppa time in my life.”

"To put it simply you are the cave full of bluntsmoken and the world is your little german boy OoOO"

"I WANT YOUR GODDAMN SLOPPY JUST GIVE ME A MINUTE” -

“oh do not call him that ill cum on the spot”

“FUCK OFF. YOU’RE SICK.”

“NO ONE EMBARASS ME IN FRONT OF THE DOG!!”

“I don’t know why I do the things I do, [NAME].”

“well that was nice im gonna go walk some more until i die now"

"Love will always triumph."

”[NAME] BECAME ALLOSEXUAL FOR VENOM, WHY CAN’T YOU?“

”[NAME] BECAME ALLOSEXUAL FOR [NAME], WHY CAN’T YOU?“

"the fist of ‘87 thats what they call me.”

“the WORST SEX youve ever seen”

“My god i would shampoo his ball hair with my saliva …”

“ALL I HAD WAS LACTATION!"

“I’m Catholic so of course I rejected help, but and however…“

"i am a feminist and a woman-lover but first and foremost i am a hater"

"i love women but some of these bitches are boring-"

“I FAILED AT BECOMING RACIST.”

"YOURE NOT VAN GOGH BITCH!!!!"

“ i need cocaine ................. “

"........What Are We DOING?"

"If you were a pickle I'd eat you but i'd still love you”

“YOUR MENTAL ILLNESS MAKES YOU OBSESS OVER BOYS WELL MY MENTAL ILLNESS MAKES ME OBSESS OVER YOUR MENTAL ILLNESS.”

“bigfoot is sexy, [NAME]”

“you know what?? friendship IS magic.”

"i would suck off any of my friends"

“when gods choir sings, will bigfoot not be among them?”

“Call [NAME] a wedding cake the way im paying women to sit on him.”

“I WAS CHURNING THY BUTTER.”

“Hon hon baguette go to hell.”

“Avert thine lustful eyes away from my daughter, fiend.”

"AS A SOCIETY we should be making sure that women do not do be dying!!!"

“How many innuendos can we make in 3 minutes?”

“Yeah, no, I’m not in the habit of dropping slurs casually. I do it competitively.”

“She’s cute! Can’t wait to watch her get spitroasted.”

“We serve cunt here, sir.”

“Bitch I don’t like milk. Its White. Its NASTY—”

“I’m not going to suck him silly. This is serious to me.”

"if [NAME] looked like a drowned rat they wouldnt get nearly as much love.”

“Yes girl we explore Jesus.”

“i work in the tuberculosis ward, and I do occasionally peak into the polio ward but I won't go into the small pox ward ykwim”

“i hate penis when it’s normal you know what i mean”

“WHO THE FUCK HATED ON MY AUTISTIC SHAWTY”

“You’re afraid of unsalted nut but allow white penis into your body”

“I’m doing research on the clitoris”

"He has the gentle eyes of a baby cow and the face of bacon and he's my BEST FRIEND. "

#roleplay memes #inbox memes #sentence starters #rp prompts #inbox prompts #decided 2 take this off one of my rp blogs n put it here 2 be more easily accessible and not #clog my blog's notifs w this every time #POAKSDJF #candyredtext

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crystalelemental · 1 year

Text

It didn’t occur to me, but the PokeFair Lodge spotlight rotation is getting an addition too. We already have all the Fair units, with Cynthia, N, Marnie, and Raihan. So...whoever they add is not going to be the Lodge unit, because that’s confirmed to be Dawn.

Which means it’s gotta be an alt.

That’s the only thing that makes sense, they’re powering up an alt rather than a base form. I am going to assume that they’re working on PokeFairs that are pre-second year anniversary, given that Marnie and Raihan both got expansions. Given this, we can rule out Lance, Steven, Gloria, Diantha, Ingo, and Emmet. But we could get SS Red, SS Blue, or Champion Iris.

...do I even need to express my thoughts?

First, this sucks. This is not a good trade. Of the initial alts, four of them are in rather dire need of help (Train Bros are still really good), while the three that are possibilities...are fine. SS Red has been so good that he’s still, STILL argued as being better than Leon. I argue this. Because he is. His self-setup 100% makes him better Leon. SS Blue is the only unit to have received an expansion long before those were real. He’s still so good because of it that people argued SS Kris wasn’t worth it, because he was there. I do think SS Blue could stand to gain a bit of consistency with his buffing that he currently lacks, but also his old expansion conflicting with a 5/5 expansion means they’re gonna go all out to make something work over what he currently has, so he doesn’t turn into a Marnie situation where you can’t afford the upgrade. And Champion Iris...I mean, same deal, really. Full energy cost shreds any hope of a seriously impactful upgrade for her. She doesn’t want to give up her sync nuke multipliers, and that leaves 11 energy. ELEVEN. That is not a good amount. She’ll afford one (1) tile; 5/5 nodes may as well be inaccessible. Literally the only thing they could possibly do, is give her Defense Crush 9 and Power Play. Anything short of that will not be worth it.

Meanwhile, Lance continues to have no ability to buff any stat, Steven’s still really sad on damage despite the striker designation, Gloria’s atrocious due to her condition for higher damage being a death sentence in CS and inconsistent in Gauntlet, and Diantha...okay honestly, I think Diantha’s actually fairly good at present, but she could still get some help. The ones who need it most seem least likely to get anything. Meanwhile three options that are already pretty damn good...may get more out of it.

I could be wrong. I hope I’m wrong. But I don’t expect to be. We’ll see what happens.

As for who I’d hope for...I mean, obviously I want Iris. I don’t respect Kanto. I especially don’t respect Red and Blue given how much the genwunner fanbase sucks them off constantly as the bestest characters ever despite being boring as sin half the time. Iris would be nice. And legitimately, of the three, she needs the most help.

As stated, her grid is...a rough time. She has 11 energy outside of her sync nuke build. What I’d like is, as stated, for her to just have Defense Crush. Double Down Defense Crush is so good that it’s argued as a lucky skill over CS2, solely for the raw power increase on random odds. But to access anything, she’d need to give up a multiplier, and either Relentless or Power Play would be nigh-required. I think Power Play synergizes best with her natural passive for move damage, Power Loving, but I’d take either. Self-sufficiency has also been a huge focus, based on a unit like N’s upgrade, and Iris is similarly hosed when it comes to self-sufficiency. Unfortunately, it would take two tiles to fix both attack and crit rate, and I have another thing I’d like to see. Speed. Iris’ gauge control is not great. So here’s what I’d like to see.

Spaces above, we get one before the sync damage node, and two above in a straight line, with Devastation directly adjacent to the left. I’d like to see Sharp Entry as the 2/5 addition below the sync damage node that tends to cost 7 energy, then Mind Games 9 as the 4/5 10 energy node, and MP Burst as the 5/5 10 energy node. Mind Games is to make her more of a spectrum debuffer, potentially hitting everything if desired for her multipliers. They cap out, but this offers Iris more of a utility role than she previously had. “At 4/5?” Listen. Just let it go.

Spaces below, we get one above the sync damage tile, then one each to the left and right below. The left side is adjacent to Pecking Order. The node above, I’d put Berserker 1 on Trainer Move for 7, while the left will be Power Play 5/5, and the right will be Defense Crush 9 for 10 each.

Berserker and Sharp Entry provide perfect self-sufficiency with MP Burst, and are available in grids with current specs. The goal is to take Devasttation over Pecking Order, keeping Iris with at least some level of team restriction as the harder condition to fill. Sharp Entry (7), Sync damage (5), Snarl +4 (4), Devastation (10), MP Burst (10), Berserker (7), Power Play/Defense Crush (10) leaves her with 2 energy. This gives her perfect self-sufficiency, trading Pecking Order for Power Play for slightly better sync damage, or reducing sync damage drastically in exchange for consistent defense debuffs.

Alternatively, if partnered with an attack/crit buffer, she can avoid the 7 energy nodes and go around, which saves 3 on Sharp Entry, and 10 on MP Burst. 15 extra energy means either three sync multipliers, or access to Defense Crush.

The only really acceptable alternative, at least to me, is placing Defense Crush near one of the sync multipliers at 4/5. If it’s 5/5 above, it’s...going to be incredibly difficult to maintain her current level of sync nuke while gaining the most valuable node. It’s Marnie and SS Leaf all over again; the allocations demand too much, and she can’t even afford the upgrade she gets. I really hope they don’t keep doing that. I know some PokeFairs did well 3/5 while others didn’t, but this full energy cost thing is a massive issue that holds these upgrades back severely.

#pokemon masters

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godsweep · 2 years

Text

“vas,” jack starts with a heavy sigh, fingers pinching the bridge of his nose at the argument that seems will be the apparent death to jack himself. “eden and i have room for you back home as does your uncle and aunt ⸺ you don’t have to stay here alone.” the god offered for what felt like the twentieth time in the last three days but the younger god won’t budge. “this is my home, i won’t leave it behind.” is all vasilios responds with as he settles in his chair, bright blue hues focusing on his uncle who nearly sighs again. ”we aren’t asking you to leave it behind, we would just like for you to get a change of scenery for a few weeks, spend time with your cousins and clear your mind,”

“i am not ares.” the younger blonde begins, muscles in his jaw setting at the mention before he’s taking in his own breath. “my emotions never cloud my judgement. i have lost the only parent i ever knew, but i haven’t lost my way. i am conscious of what’s right and what’s wrong.” jack examines his nephew’s features - watches as there’s no emotion in the familiar blue hues. watches how this seems like it’s just another casual conversation - as if they aren’t standing in the the home that was filled with ghosts of their loved ones. “you still have your father, if you will not let us be there for you at least ⸺ let your father be there. that is his job as a parent, to bear your burdens for you.” jack’s explanation causes vas to double over in laughter, shaking his head as he tries to calm this obnoxious laugh of his. “as a father? when has ares ever been a father to me? he’s a coward. hiding behind chains because he’s scared to ask for help. you might be a father to iris and isaac but ares is not what a father is meant to be for me.” the younger male tells him, leaning back into his chair with a shrug. “besides, he’s been gone fifteen years what good could that man do for me besides try to make up for loss time? i could care less. i’m only interested in one thing,”

“tell me what it is you need and i will get it for you,” eager to help his nephew, the younger god leans in, a new emotion in his eyes. a hint of bloodlust in his eyes if you will. “i will bring back our family. and anyone who tries to stop me will meet the edge of my sword.” vas informed his uncle, posture straightening when he hears the familiar footsteps approaching from the back door. “and it seems we have summoned the god of war himself.” a hand moves in the air as if to dismiss his father’s appearance as ares (who is still recovering from zeus’ imprisonment) leans against the nearby wall, arms folded across broad chest. “do you know what kind of power you need to bring dead deities back to life?” ares asked, with no harm intended in his question and vasilios rolls his eyes, sigh following as his eyes remain on jack. “i would give my life if needed, whatever power is required. whatever brings them back. it is worth the sacrifice.” the house falls silent ⸺ and for a moment, jack wonders if this is ares’ son talking or winnie’s. either way, it’s a sentence that causes his stomach to churn. “you are the last one who i’ll let sacrifice themselves⸺” vasilios childlike laughter causes ares to stop his train of thought, turning to jack to see if jack knew what the joke was but the share bewildered expression proved otherwise. “i don’t recall asking for permission. it’s my life ⸺ my decision, if i wish to.. lay my life down on the line to bring back my mother ⸺ my aunt ‘risa and the man whose been the only father figure i’ve had in the last fifteen years, i’ll do it.”

“watch your tone despite this ⸺ anger you have towards me, i’m still your father and you will speak to me with some respect,” ares tells his son as jack leans back in his chair, watching this little, debate unfold before him ⸺ he wasn’t interested in intervening unless either parties would say or do something that couldn’t be taken back. “you’re a fool to think it’s just anger i have for you ares.” vasilios pushes himself from his seat, turning into the direction of his father as ares keeps his cool, shoulders relaxed as vasilios makes his move to close the distance. “i spent the last fifteen years jealous of what my cousins had, loving parents, a father who cared about their child.” vasilios rant begins and ares quickly cuts him off. “i do love you despite this narrative you’ve created in your head, i have loved you since the moment i knew you existed. but you speak on a matter you have no knowledge in.” ares countered as his son scoffed, “that i have no knowledge in. your affliction, the weight of your memories, trigger something primal in you? so you leave to olympus, your father chains you ⸺ i know the story,”

“i did it to protect you and your mother. your safety was all that mattered to me, i didn’t care what happened to me, as long as the two of you were safe⸺” vasilios eyes narrow, muscles in his jaw clenched as he takes one good look at his father. “are you aware that physical wounds heal faster for us gods?” he asked his father, calloused fingertips jutting at his father’s chest. “but the wounds in here, last for eons. you weren’t protecting us, you abandoned us, all the times that i have had to listen to my mother fall apart and pretend as if i don’t hear it or how i calm her emotions ⸺ or the fact that uncle ellis has to step in and teach me things you were supposed to because you were scared of asking for help. your pride is what ruined our family. and it’s going to my pride that brings it back together ⸺ my mother might love you for some gods reason but i do not.” the words hit ares harder than anything he’s ever felt. jack, immediately stands and moves towards the two as ares’ brows furrow. “it should have been you. it should have been you. i should have never brought uncle el’ and aunt ‘risa to olympus to save you. it was your choice to be chained, i should have let you suffer the consequences of your actions. now look ⸺ look at everything that’s happened.”

“that’s enough.” jack says, sticking himself in between the two as he watches the emotions flicker in his cousin’s eyes. “no, he deserves to hear it. he deserves to feel the pain that i have felt from his absence my entire life - this void that i feel in my chest that i can’t ⸺ that i cannot shake, the desperate need to live up to his image ⸺ a man who claims to be my father yet, hasn’t even proven himself to be a father.” a finger is pointed over jack’s shoulder and at his father as jack keeps his hand against vas’ chest, “enough nephew, enough. your father has heard enough.”

“has he? has he? because i lost my mother ⸺ the woman who has shown me every wonder in this realm, who has wiped my tears and taught me everything i’ve known, the woman who ⸺ who taught me it was okay to feel hurt and betrayed and that it was okay to feel human. and she’s gone, the woman whose held me in her arms when i felt like the world was caving in and sung me to sleep on the nights that i begged the gods to bring me back ⸺ the gods, ares, the gods! i prayed to you! i called out for you ⸺ mother called out for you and you never came, you never came back for us. every lightening strike that lit up the sky i wished and prayed and begged for it to be you but it wasn’t. it never was.” his voice cracks as it grows in volume, tears threatening to spill over as jack feels his own heart breaking at his nephew’s outburst. “⸺uncle ellis taught me how to swing a sword, how to be a man, how to ⸺ how to be a warrior and helped me craft my armor and my sword, taught me how to control my powers like he did for you and aunt ‘enna, that should have been you. and i begged and i begged for it to be you, how many times has uncle ellis held me in his arms during sparring sessions because i couldn’t raise my sword any more because i felt as if i wouldn’t be strong enough to save you!”

ares mouth continues to hang open as vas’ years worth of anger has finally begin to spill over, dark clouds soon looming over the house as jack turns to ares, trying to warn him over the looming storm that his son was bringing in. “and now he’s gone just like mother is and aunt ‘risa ⸺ she’s gone too, how many times has she held mother? comforted her? promised her that she’d bring you home to us one day? how many times has she held me? how many times has everyone else filled in for your absence? why couldn’t you just ask mother for help? why couldn't you let her calm you as she’s done before? so i could have my father? that’s all i’ve ever wanted in my life and you didn’t grant me that. your pride ⸺ you gods and your fucking pride.” jack isn’t sure how vas manages to push past him but he does, shoving his father into the wall and leaving a small dent in it. curled fists slamming into his father’s chest as ares motions for jack to not intervene again, whatever anger his son had was warrented and he would welcome it. “and now you come, trying to ⸺ lecture me on what power needs to be drawn to bring them back? can’t you see? i have nothing left i ⸺ i am nothing without my mother, she’s my person, my ⸺ my reason to fight, to raise my sword and she’s gone and i will do everything that’s needed to bring her back. to bring them back. no matter what it costs. i will bring war to all realms if needed.” a familiar promise that would’ve caused ares to smile if the situation was different. ares fingers begin to curl around his son’s wrist, despite the struggle and keeps his eyes on his, watching as vas seems to resort back to the scared child that winona had comforted at night.

“i can’t ⸺ i can’t live without my mother, i can’t ⸺ i won’t ⸺ please don’t let me live without her, wherever she is ⸺ whether it’s in the underworld or in olympus, please just, let me be with her. so she’s not alone, so i can apologize to her for leaving her and sending her back to poseidon, i have to tell ⸺ i have to tell her. please father just take me to my mother.” the guilt. it was the guilt he carried ⸺ feeling the responsibility of the his mother’s death. for ellis’. for karisa’s. that’s what this was. finally giving up, vasilios head hangs low and ares with caution, cradles the back of his son’s head, bringing him into his chest with a sigh of relief that vasilios falls into the embrace. tears still falling as ares looks over to jack and jack just waves his hand, taking the hint to leave the two alone.

after a few minutes of vasilios sobbing into his father’s chest, ares pulls him away, placing rougher hands on his son’s cheeks, expression hardened. “you will not sacrifice your life to bring anymore back, do you understand me? i will. i will give my life if that’s what this comes too never you, i will bring your mother back to you. and your uncle and aunt, i swear it. i swear it ⸺ even with my last breath, so as long as my heart beats in my chest, i will spend every waking moment trying to find a way to bring them back to you.” ares promised as vasilios presses his forehead against his father’s, lips pursed as he tries to keep it together. “this family will be whole again.” ares promises again as vas just nods slowly, “in any world,” is what vas starts with as ares feels his own emotions clawing at the back of his throat. “in any world, in every world from now and for the centuries to come, you will always have the both of us. i promise.”

/ @intheirabsence !

#* ♡ ⸺ int. › drabbles .

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thememphislee · 1 year

Text

“Three Times Dead”

I have wanted to write this for so long, however my health compromised my ability to write. This is the first time that I have talked about it publicly although I have hinted at it, so bear with me. I am living with cancer; I am not dying of it. It’s a mouthful, so don’t get me wrong, I was terrified when I got the news. There’s something about the words “Stage 4” and “You have the deadliest form of cancer” that wakes you up. What do I say to that? How do I even respond? It's dramatic to say the least.

They cut out a cancerous tumor from my neck and removed multiple melanomas from my face. What causes it, or why, is still a question yet to be answered. All I know is that it can spread to my organs fast. My first response; “Liquor Store!” I decided that if I was going out, I wouldn’t be doing it sober. Drinking has always been my best friend.

I just finished my second hospital visit that lasted for 4 days and two weeks before that I spent 9 days in treatment. Alcohol always comes up and always affects my treatment, as if I need to explain why I am drinking. I just assumed it was obvious. Dying never lived and living with it until the end, I don’t recommend doing it sober.

Everyone always has an opinion, yet none of them are facing immanent death. It kind of changes things. When you’re the one dying, so much advice is comprised of talking about your diet. For me, get the fuck out of here with that bullshit! Let me drink if I need to, fuck healthy if I’m already dying.

When they removed the first melanoma on my face, it was a breeze. When I look back at old photos, I noticed that it was always there. It was the second one that required surgery. They had to cut my throat basically and cut the cancerous tumor out. At the time I posted pics of the tumor and the stitches that followed, and eventually the scar. Unfortunately, the surgery didn’t go well.

My sister and mother flew in for the surgery, because the diagnosis that I assumed was grim, and I felt like I needed to say goodbye. I had the surgery, I was fine, we went back to the hotel, and I was tired, so I laid down only to wake up a couple of hours later covered in blood that led to my sister and I rushing to the emergency room where they were able to stop the bleeding.

Eventually we made it back to the hotel after a few long hours in the hospital. I went directly to bed. I ended up waking up pouring with sweat, however when I wiped my forehead it was covered in blood. I got up out of the bed and realized that I was completely drenched in blood, the comforter and mattress was soaked in blood. My bandages fell apart because they were soaked in blood, and I just sat in the chair calling to my mother that I needed help.

I remember sitting up in a chair and asking my mom not to panic because I was covered in blood and my bed was soaked with blood. She immediately called out to my sister, and they called 911. I passed out on the floor and my mom had given me a towel to stop the bleeding, however every time I put a new towel on it was sprayed with blood. The fire department showed up first and as they pulled off the bandages, I remember the fireman stating to the paramedics that showed up second that my neck was “spraying” blood out of my neck. I overheard the firemen and paramedics say that I would have bled to death in another hour. The individual that performed the surgery had sliced my carotid artery!

When I got to the emergency room, they couldn’t stop the bleeding, so I went into emergency surgery to cut my throat back open and cauterize everything. Let me just say it was unpleasant, although it was painful, the smell of burning flesh is nauseating! The good news is that I recovered.

And then there was my third death sentence. I was so jacked up on psychiatric medications I lost the ability to walk, my speech was affected, and I had tremors so bad that I couldn’t feed myself or drink out of a glass I shook so bad. I made the decision to come back home to Memphis to be with my family and move in with my mom who has been taking care of me. I received a lethal dose of Lithium that was almost fatal!

Tomorrow is coming, wish me luck!

The Memphis lee Speaks, now ya’ heard!

That’s how I roll.!!!

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jungkxook · 4 years

Text

—moonstruck. (m)

⟶ pairing: taehyung x reader

⟶ genre: werewolf!taehyung au / arranged marriage au / smut with a sprinkle of fluff

⟶ words: 7,421

⟶ rating: 18+

⟶ summary: in hindsight, being friends with a pack of werewolves and, thus, suddenly being thrown into a world of supernatural furries and other inhuman beings isn’t something you would recommend but it was too late to back out now, especially when you consider the fact that apparently you’re now being “hunted” and the only way to save you is to be mated with taehyung. whatever that means.

⟶ warnings: multiple smut scenes, first time (virgin!taehyung), clumsy sex, soft and gentle sex, sort of rough sex, all the sex, cunnilingus, riding, hair pulling, knotting, buckets of cum, biting kink, slight impregnation kink, unprotected sex, creampie

⟶ disclaimer: first fic back after a long hiatus and i’m suddenly v nervous to post this!! also this is shamelessly and 100% inspired by an episode of the show outlander (to be exact, the wedding episode). i couldn’t help myself!!

“Are you serious right now?”

In hindsight, being friends with a pack of werewolves and, thus, suddenly being thrown into a world of supernatural furries and other inhuman beings isn’t something you would recommend but it was too late to back out now, especially when you consider the fact that apparently you’re now being “hunted.” Whatever that means.

Had you heard yourself speak a year ago before meeting Taehyung and having your life turned upside down, you would have surely thought you were insane, and you would have definitely thought Taehyung is insane, and the rest of his friends who are, subsequently, now yours ━ each of whom are all currently splayed out before you in Namjoon’s spacious country-side home with similar grave looks staring back at you.

“Dead serious,” Hoseok takes the liberty of breaking the odd silence saturating the kitchen. He’s made it a point to be on time for once, which you consider great and all if it wasn’t basically to dispute your current death sentence. “Always thought Jaebum’s pack were sons of bitches ━ glad to know it’s still true.”

“Hoseok,” Yoongi scolds. “Be a little more compassionate.”

“Am I wrong?” Hoseok refutes.

From off to the side, Jimin pushes himself forward with a frustrated groan, shaking his head. “Tae, I told you this was a dumb fucking idea ━ bringing Y/N into the pack━”

“I didn’t think this would happen,” Taehyung protests hotly. He’s leaning against the wall somewhere behind you, arms crossed over his chest and a deep frown darkening his face.

“How could you not think this would happen?” Jungkook retorts bitterly.

“Shut up, Jungkook.”

“She’s a human,” Jungkook says. “Jaebum wants her gone, but if he were to get his hands on her, then who knows what could happen━”

“I said shut up, Jungkook,” Taehyung snarls, an odd vehement tone dripping from his every word that is out of the place for the usually tranquil boy. Jungkook’s mouth clamps shut at once, though you suspect it’s not to do with defeat more so than because he’s the newest addition to the pack and, while Namjoon is their leader (or Alpha, as you’ve heard being thrown around before), Taehyung was something of a second-in-command. You could only imagine the consequences of crossing either Namjoon or Taehyung within the pack.

“Hold on a second,” You try to sputter for air, lungs wheezing. Your mind has since been spinning, struggling to keep up. At first you thought they were joking when they had told you, but now you were beginning to understand the severity at the very least. “I’m being hunted? Why?”

Now, Namjoon looks from Taehyung, then to you, and back again. Taehyung hesitates to answer at first, and Jungkook scowls. “Well, tell her, Tae. You dragged her into this mess. She deserves to hear it from you.”

As you twist in your seat to look up at Taehyung, your eyes locking briefly with his, the boy grimaces and then has to look away. He takes a deep breath before responding. “Okay, look. You know that pack I told you about? Jaebum’s?”

You nod, though the memory is vague. You’ve heard the name in passing before, but you could only gather that there was some sort of animosity between his and Taehyung’s pack.

“He found out about you, and I don’t know how,” Taehyung explains. “And now he wants you gone, and he’ll do anything to see it through.”

You blink once, dumbfounded. Terrified, even. Taehyung can certainly hear it in your voice and it makes him flinch again, as if being striked across the face. “Why?”

“Because you’re not one of us,” Taehyung says. “Because you’re human. When I first told you about us, I was risking everything. It’s uncommon for one of us to bring a human into the pack just because, and often even frowned upon. There’s a fear you’ll expose us to the human world or the hunters. Jaebum’s threatening to start war if we don’t deal with this situation ourselves.”

It’s only then that the dread begins to creep upon you, chilling you to the bone. “Deal with it… how?”

“The ultimatum is either kill you ourselves, or give you over to Jaebum to deal with, as a sort of peace offering,” Namjoon says carefully.

“Which probably also results in death,” Hoseok points out morbidly.

Jin scoffs. “Or worse.”

“Is there any option that doesn’t result in death?” You ask warily. At this, the group falls silent once more.

“Well, there is one.” Namjoon glances fleetingly around at his brethren, then sighs. “You become one of us.”

“I━” You stammer, face suddenly hot. “You mean, like, a werewolf?”

“I mean, a wedding.”

“A wedding?” You gasp. “How is that going to save me?”

“Not a wedding like you think,” Namjoon says. “More of a bonding. A handfasting. Right now, as a human, you’re vulnerable and exposed. We have no claim over you. But if you become one of us ━ without being turned ━ then Jaebum shouldn’t be able to touch you.”

Slowly, you begin to piece together the fragment of your dilemma. “Marry who?”

A beat of silence passes amongst the group in which time you spot Namjoon nod in the direction of Taehyung’s figure beyond you, a wordless yet clear gesture. Suddenly, a stubborn warmth of a blush pinches at your cheeks. You wonder if they can notice, if Taehyung can notice. You start, “Taehyung━?”

“He offered to be the one,” Namjoon says. “And Jaebum knows Taehyung’s role in the pack. If he knows you’re mated to Tae, Jaebum would be absolutely insane to try and come for you. It’s the only way, Y/N, and it ensures your safety.”

“Marrying Taehyung?” You ask shrilly, voice dangerously thin. “How is marrying Taehyung going to ensure my safety?”

“It’s not just a marriage,” Jimin explains.

But of course you already know this, werewolf laws a strange and intricate jumble of rules that you’ve long since grown accustomed to. When he speaks next, you already know it’s much more than a marriage; and, when he speaks next, you fear you’ve already had your fate decided for you.

“It’s not just a marriage,” Namjoon repeats, matter-of-fact, “because we’re making you Taehyung’s mate.”

“You didn’t have to do this.”

You try not to think about it. Admittedly, marrying your friend who you have only known for a year isn’t something you had been expecting. But, as Namjoon had explained it, it wasn’t necessarily a legal unification between you and Taehyung, though you suppose it’s as valid now as any marriage with the ritualistic handfasting ceremony making it official. That, and you favoured living to see another day instead of becoming a werewolf’s next meal or ripped to shreds by one.

Only a day after your conversation with the boys of Taehyung’s pack, you’ve come to your ultimate decision which has led you to where you are now, returning to Namjoon’s home for a wedding. Your wedding. You hadn’t very long to decide your own fate anyway, with the boys grimly warning you it was now or never. But you trust them, despite this crazed ludicrous situation you find yourself in ━ and you trust Taehyung more than anything, your friendship with him having quickly blossomed into something so sincerely profound over the year that you’ve known him.

If you’re being honest, Namjoon’s pack had at least made an effort for the occasion because despite how unconventional it is, it was still a celebration. A celebration for your marriage, and a celebration for their hopeful victory over Jaebum. Still, the underlying threat of the evening remains, made more prevalent by the fact that it was required to invite at least another pack (of which you’ve met the leader, Jisoo, a handful of times before) as witnesses. It’s a simple ceremony too, quaint and cute if you weren’t clinging to life. You had made it a point to dress up, digging a pretty white dress from the depths of your closet with flowing butterfly-like sleeves; Taehyung had forgone a suit but was still handsomely dressed too, leaving you to feel like less of an idiot. Namjoon had officiated it, standing before you and Taehyung as you held one another’s hand, wrapped delicately in ribbon, listening to the vows being proclaimed that talked about true love, and the passion and yearning involved.

When the handfasting finally draws to a close, you’re shoved into a room alone with Taehyung for a moment of privacy by Hoseok, who can be heard quipping wolfishly, “Get it over with quick!” before vanishing behind the closed door. You wager he’s left to join with the rest of the festivities outside where, no doubt, every werewolf is currently drinking themselves blind.

Finally alone with Taehyung, a saturated silence fills the air that has you wringing your hands anxiously in front of you. You sit on the edge of the bed in the center of the room. “What other choice was there, Tae?”

Taehyung takes a moment to respond, and even he knows the thought is a useless one when it crosses his mind before voicing it aloud. “We could have ran away.”

“How far would we get?” You sigh. Still, the sorrow earnest in his voice and riddling his face is enough to make you look up at him sympathetically. “I’m no use to you if Jaebum or someone worse finds us by ourselves. Besides, the boys need you.”

“No, you need me,” Taehyung insists. “Jungkook’s right. I dragged you and the pack into this mess. It’s my responsibility to fix this.”

He drags his feet towards the bed, then flops down onto his back on the mattress. A troubled groan punctuates the air, and you sneak a glance behind you to see him rubbing warily at his eyes.

You decide now would be the best time to ask the one question that has been on your mind since the night before when you were sitting in Namjoon’s kitchen to discuss Jaebum’s scorn. “Is that why… Is that why you offered to be my mate?”

“Yes,” Taehyung admits meekly. “Sort of. Think we’d all rather it be me than Joon, anyway.”

You don’t argue with this. The reasons as to why it had to be Taehyung satisfied you well enough. That, and aside from having befriended the pack over the months, you’re much closer to Taehyung than you are with the others.

“So…” You trail off, clearing your throat. At this point, you’re simply speaking for the sake of filling the void. “What now?”

Taehyung shrugs. He looks around the room. “Nothing.”

“Well, what did Hoseok mean just now? Get what over with?”

“Erm━” Taehyung opens his mouth, as if preparing to explain, then decides otherwise. “It’s nothing.”

“Taehyung, we literally just got married and you’re already keeping secrets from me,” You retort. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong,” he insists. “It’s just that… Well…” He sits up from the bed, meeting your curious gaze. “This was essentially a mating, and every mating needs to be seen through to the end to be considered valid. The pack can tell when it’s… uh… done.”

Oh.

Now it hits you. It’s the way he awkwardly trails off, hand ruffling through his long locks, that has you immediately understanding what he’s trying to imply. You gawk upward at him. “Are you asking me to sleep with you?”

Suddenly, Taehyung looks flustered and he shakes his head frantically. “I mean, they expect it, but I would never force it on you.” Then, he straightens up, as if captivated by a newfound confidence. The smallest of smirks dances upon his lips that you don’t miss. “Besides, I never said it had to be between you and me. As long as they can sense it, I’d say your hand would do just fine instead ━ but you have all night for that.”

“Oh my god.”

The smirk widens into a devious look now. “You said you wanted honesty.”

As he dissolves into a fit of stifled chuckles, you scowl but you wager it’s mostly an attempt to hide the frazzled look on your face. Then, hurrying to change the topic, ask, “Is every mating like that then?”

“Yeah,” Taehyung admits. “If two mates want to stay together forever, they complete the process with marking, usually by a bite. It strengthens the mating bond.”

Taehyung notices you squirm in your spot, crossing your knee over the other and squeezing your thighs together. He can sense you’re uncomfortable, understandably with your current situation, but can’t quite pinpoint what else seems to make you sit so rigidly.

“What was it like for you?” He decides to ask. “The handfasting?”

The question takes you by surprise, though his sincere intrigue makes you smile smally to yourself. “I’ve never experienced anything like that before, but it was… It was nice.” You think back to nearly an hour ago, and the way Taehyung had looked standing before you. While you were marrying him out of necessity, there was something candidly beautiful about the entire ceremony. At the very least, you were glad it had been with Taehyung of all people. “Can I be honest with you, Tae?”

“Of course,” Taehyung says. “At this point, you can pretty much tell me anything. Don’t think anything’s as shocking as coming out as a werewolf.”

An innocent giggle bubbles at your throat. Suddenly, you look sheepish. “I might have had one too many glasses of wine before coming.”

“Ah.” Despite the interested hum of noise, he looks genuinely entertained. “So you’re drunk?”

“Not quite. Pleasantly buzzed,” You say. “Well, can you blame me? The occasion called for it considering a bunch of wolves want to kill me and I’m being arranged into a marriage.”

“So you don’t remember anything about your own wedding?”

You pull a face, though Taehyung gathers it’s because of the blunt mention of the word. “I do. Just… not all of it. Some things are clearer than others, but I think that’s mostly because I was nervous.”

“I remember every moment,” Taehyung muses thoughtfully. “I remember seeing you there, in your dress, and everything felt right despite it all.” His stare hardens in that moment, as if probed by the harsh reminder of the reasoning behind the night in the first place. “You know I’ll do anything to keep you safe, right? We haven’t had time to sit back and talk it over but you really do mean the world to me.”

A muffled groan eclipses your lips. You dig the heels of your palms against your eyes as you bemoan, “Don’t say those kinds of things, Tae.”

“Why?”

“Because… Because…” Your eyes shoot open, though suddenly you refuse to meet his curious wandering gaze.

But Taehyung doesn’t even need you to finish your thought. You wonder if it’s one of the many keen abilities possessed by these shapeshifters or if it’s simply a Taehyung thing, being that he’s quickly become one of your closest friends over the year that you’ve known him.

“You’re still nervous,” he hums as delicately as possible. It’s not an accusation, but a simple fact of the matter. He pushes himself to sit on the edge of the bed beside you, leaving an appropriate amount of space between the two of you. “Are you nervous because of me?”

“No.”

“That’s a lie,” Taehyung snorts. When you don’t respond immediately, a small inkling of a doubt makes him question apprehensively, “Are you scared of me then? I wouldn’t blame you, especially after everything that’s been going on━”

“What?” You finally turn to look at him, a look of incredulousness contorting your face. “No! No, I’m not scared of you, Tae. I could never be scared of you.” You don’t dare turn to face him, instead keeping your eyes fixed on your hands as you continue. “You make me nervous, but not in a bad way. Does that make any sense?”

“Yeah. Yeah, it does.” When you chance a look at him, you find him smiling softly to himself. “It’s the same way I felt when I saw you earlier tonight.”

Your heart quickens in pace against your chest, and you’re almost positive he can surely hear it. Now, you finally lift your timid stare to meet his pensive look, and you have to bite back the smile that threatens to form on your face. He looks distracted, though not in a way where his mind is elsewhere entirely; instead, he seems besotted, dark eyes shimmering gently, and there’s a palpable shift of energy in the atmosphere.

Without even realizing it, the pair of you begin to gravitate towards one another, leaning in close enough to shorten the distance between the two of you. You pause, lingering near enough to feel his warm breath fanning against your neck. He can’t help himself, and reaches out with his hand to brush his fingers along your shoulder to the base of your throat, sending chills down your spine. His hand comes to rest against your neck, fingers stretching outward to cradle the back of your head. He guides you toward him this time, closer and closer.

“Taehyung…” You whisper.

He stops at once, clamps his mouth shut and squeezes his eyes closed. His restraint seems to be not without labour, judging by the sobering small shake of his head, and the way he leans his forehead against yours, tendons in his jaw fluttering as he clenches his teeth. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t.”

“I want you to.”

He’s startled when you’re the one that moves first, catching his lips onto yours. He’s unmoving at first, basking in the feel and taste of your mouth smoothing over his. It’s slow, steady, but then he’s craning his neck to deepen the kiss and something feverish overtakes the both of you. You clamber onto his lap at once, swinging one leg over his and settling back onto him, your dress bunching up at your thighs. He’s taken aback for a moment, though his hands instinctively come to grip at your waist and you try not to focus on how large and warm they feel, burning against the material of your dress. In fact, every inch of him radiates a thermal energy that is both comforting and excites you. You chase his lips, yearning for another kiss, but he hesitates at the last moment, jerking his head away. He doesn’t move very far at first, then he drops his head into the crook of your neck. His nose burrows against the base of your throat, his lips brushing against your skin as he moves along your neck to your shoulder, then back again. You can tell he’s holding himself back, not quite allowing himself to enjoy this. To enjoy you.

“You said we have all night, didn’t you?” You rasp. “So why not start now?”

“I also said it didn’t have to be between you and me if you didn’t want it to be.” Taehyung finds his voice at long last, however hoarse it may be. You’re already driving him crazy, just by your smell alone. “Are you sure? You said you wanted honesty, so be honest with me, Y/N. Don’t just say it’s because it has to be done. I don’t want you to regret anything.”

“Well, don’t you want this?” You question.

“Fuck, yes.” He groans against your neck. Something feral seems to stir within him, and you can feel his canines bare against your skin. “But only if you do.”

You aren’t quite sure what seems to possess you all of a sudden. He’s intoxicating, you think. Your hands tug at his hair now, desperation wearing your own voice thin. “Yes, Tae. Please. I want you inside me so badly.”

Finally, he presses his mouth against your throat, tonguing hot open-mouthed kisses there. His grip tightens around your waist, tugging you harder against him, and the feeling of him growing harder against your inner thigh in a matter of seconds has you both enraptured by a newfound heated ferocity.

Grasping at a moment of clarity, you ask meekly, “Isn’t this your first time?”

“Is it that obvious?”

You want to tell him anything but, the way his hands and lips move across you an indicator of that. “I thought you wolves are all about sex. Don’t you, like, go into heat or something?”

It’s a feeble attempt at a snarky joke, judging by the way your lips unfurl into a languid smirk. “Typically. But I never wanted sex for the sake of fucking. The boys make fun of me all the time for it.”

You snicker, but the delightful noise is lost in a simper as he continues to kiss upward to the underside of your jaw. He grips tightly at your waist and moves, shifting the two of you around, until your back is splayed out on the edge of the bed and he’s hovering directly over you.

“Taehyung…” He grunts in response, though you don’t blame him for not responding. The way his cock bulges against your core now, the way you press your hips up into his instinctively, is enough to drive you insane, let alone the boy. Still, you manage to rasp, “Tae, just don’t bite me. Promise me.”

“I won’t,” he assures, though now he certainly seems preoccupied. He inhales deeply, nostrils flaring, and whines aloud, “God, I can already smell you. So fucking good.”

His head falls into the crook of your neck as his hips dig harshly into yours in a way that makes you aware of what his words seem to mean. Slick arousal already begins to form between your legs, pooling into a mess on your underwear that has you squirming beneath him. The thought of him being able to smell you makes your face heat, but he doesn’t seem to notice. He kisses down to your collarbones, then, without warning, flips you over at once. Rough hands grasp at your waist, pulling you to your knees and your ass off the edge of the bed. As he fumbles to tear your panties from your hips, then lifts the skirt of your dress up with one hand, he hurries to undo his belt and the button of his pants with the other.

“Wait, Tae━” You gasp. Before he can push himself into you, you heave yourself up with your hands and twist just enough to place your palm above his waist on his abdomen, stopping him in his place. “What are you doing?”

“What’s wrong?” he asks, brows creasing with concern. “Isn’t this how it’s done? I’m not totally helpless.”

You bite back your abrupt grin, swallowing your amusement when you realize he’s genuinely confused. It’s hard to grasp how he can look so innocent even despite his leaking cock still in his hand. “Well, yeah, but not always.”

“I just thought it was like how dogs go at it, y’know?” Taehyung says. “The guys all seem to say so anyway.”

You can’t help it now when this newfound information has you keeling over with laughter. You’re fortunate he doesn’t seem offended by your delight, instead grinning sheepishly to himself as he watches you wipe tears away from your eyes.

“What?” he asks promptly, and then as if to nudge you back to reality, tightens his grip on your waist and yanks you towards him gingerly. Pressing his front flush against your back, he catches your ear lobe between his teeth and nibbles on it.

“Then I feel sorry for their mates,” You manage to choke out. “It’s not bad, but I want to be able to see you the first time around. It’s better that way. More intimate.”

You squirm out from beneath him, turning to face him properly. Still sprawled out before him, you prop yourself up on your elbow and then reach out with your other hand to grab at his face and pull him down to you.

“Noted,” he hums into your mouth. “Anything else I should know?”

“Nothing that I can think of at the moment,” You admit, though maybe that’s simply because your mind is spinning at the sight of his length.

He’s much, much bigger than you imagined, tip irritated and swollen red already, glistening with precum as he swipes his palm over himself a handful of times. You hike your dress up further around your waist as he guides himself towards you.

“Stop me if it hurts,” he says.

You nod, though you trust him well enough to know he’ll treat you right in the best way possible. As he pushes the tip of his length against your folds and into you, your reactions are almost immediate. He ceases above you, face scrunching up at the feeling of your slickness around him. You notice his furrowed brows, the way he bares his teeth. A guttural growl sounds deep within his chest that has you shuddering in anticipation.

“Oh, fuck,” he moans. “You’re so fucking wet. You take me so well, baby. I don’t think I’ll last long.”

“Don’t care,” You whimper. “Just wanna feel you.”

He pushes himself in further, slowly and carefully, inch-by-inch, in just a way that has the both of you feeling how he stretches you open every single step of the way. You wonder how much further you can go until he’s stopping, bottoming out within you. He sputters for air, collapsing against your chest entirely as you fall back onto the bed. He waits just enough for you to adjust to the girth of his weight in you, then rolls his hips into yours. Then again, and again, until he’s grinding into you with such measured and deep strokes that you melt beneath him entirely. You kick your legs up to wrap around his waist, head lolling back at the feeling of his mouth sucking against your throat.

“I’m gonna━” His voice splinters off then into an abrupt cry. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum━”

He’s quick to dissolve into shambles, grunting and moaning every time you clench around him and every thrust of his hips. Just when you think you’ve lost yourself to the moment, he cums much faster than you thought and entirely unexpected for him too, in hot waves that have you still writhing beneath him. When he’s spent, his weight falls slack against you, crushing you beneath him but in a comforting manner. It’s silently peaceful for a few moments as he settles, heart thundering in his chest and against yours. Your fingers smooth over his sweaty long locks, scratching at his head. Then━

“That was terrible, wasn’t it?” he mutters wretchedly.

“Not terrible,” You confess. “What was that? Three minutes, top? For your first time, I’m honestly surprised you lasted more than a minute.”

“Fuck off.” His fingers poke at your sides teasingly as you burst out into laughter. He lifts his head to meet yours, perhaps a little embarrassed. “Don’t tell the guys. They’ll never let me live it down.”

“Doesn’t matter,” You hum, tracing your finger down to his lips. “We can practice whenever you want. I’ll make you into a lover so good, you’ll want me to brag to them.”

“Practice, huh?” His eyes sparkle mischievously. He pulls himself from your core and you hiss at the sudden loss, tugging at his chest as if to keep him close to you but he seems to have other plans. “Why stop now?”

You watch him curiously. “Easy there, boy. Don’t wear yourself out.”

“Well, I have to make it up to you,” he points out. “Especially on your wedding night. It’s only fair. What kind of lousy mate would I be to call it a night without having you cum on my face?”

“Romantic.” You roll your eyes but you marvel at the way you had shuddered at the word only moments ago and now, under such a different circumstance, the way he utters it makes your heart flutter in your chest. “Is this the first time you’ve eaten a girl out?”

“I said I was a virgin,” he says. Your eyes stay trained on the boy as he shifts himself further down your body to wedge himself between your thighs, throwing one leg over his shoulder. He kisses at your navel, then down to your core. He takes his time as he reaches out with his fingers to swipe at your folds, admiring the way his cum leaks from you; then, with his forefinger, he wipes at a stray bead of his arousal and pushes it back into your cunt slowly. The simple action is enough to have your back arching off the bed, hands flying out to brace yourself by gripping at his hair. “I never said I didn’t know how to please a woman elsewhere.”

“Enlighten me.”

“Gladly.”

He sinks lower to your core and out of sight, leaving hot open mouthed kisses along the way. His finger never once leaves its spot within you, and instead is joined by another that spreads you wide in absence of his cock.

“Do you know how hard it is to focus on anything other than your beautiful cunt?” he asks, voice low and sultry. “From the moment I could smell you, I wanted a taste.”

His tongue probes against your clit, the wet muscle a sudden startle that has you slackening against him. He flicks it back and forth, mouth wrapping around the bundle of nerves and sucking hard. A moan threatens to fall from your lips but an intrusive thought crossing your mind has you swallowing it with much difficulty.

“Can’t the boys hear us from down there?” You ask. You wonder how the celebration for your “wedding” has unfolded over the night without you or Taehyung there, or if they even notice your prolonged absence.

“No.” His voice is a deep mumble, rattling you from your core outward. “We learn how to tune out sounds nearby unless we really want to pay attention. The new ones struggle a bit, though.”

He curls his fingers inside you, stretching them upward. You pant, “Isn’t Jungkook still new?”

You can feel his smirk unfurling against you even before he pokes his head up to look at you with devious, hooded eyes. “Yeah, well, it’s a bit of a hazing process.”

You hardly have time to register the thought, though it doesn’t matter much. You’re far too overwhelmed by the way Taehyung is making you feel to even care. He drops his mouth from your clit to your folds, tongue swirling against your aching core. He laps at your cunt like a mangy dog as his fingers continue to work within you. The further he burrows into you, the harder his nose digs against your clit and sends you over the edge. You try to hold on just a little longer but your core is already achingly sensitive from when his length had made it home.

“Cum for me,” he murmurs. “Don’t hold back, baby. Let me taste you.”

Fingers twisting in his hair, he growls roughly against you, basking in the way you mewl and moan his name. Time seems to blur and, before you know it, you’ve reached your high. You’re embarrassingly wet, soaking his chin and nose which glistens with a mixture of yours and his arousal. Taehyung doesn’t hold back, instead licking you clean of every last drop, a muffled moan of content emitting from him.

“So good,” he says. “All mine.”

When he finally pulls away from you, he licks at his lips as if not quite finished with your every taste. From where he sits, you’re an entire mess, brows scrunched in concentration, teeth tugging at your lower lip. Needy hands yank at his hair and he obliges, kissing his way up your body to meet your mouth. His tongue pokes through to lav at your lips and wedges itself beyond, and you suck delightfully at the taste of you and him mingling on it. His own hands caress your body, bringing you back down from your high gradually but you can still feel his straining dick against your thigh and it invigorates you even further despite the beginning hints of exhaustion starting to creep upon you.

“Want more,” Taehyung growls with a newfound intensity, catching you off guard. “Need your cunt. M’gonna make it mine. Need to make you mine. Gonna fill you with my cum till you’re bursting with my pups, how does that sound?”

Mind spinning, you nod eagerly at the thought. Your words form in the shape of a moan. “Yes, please.”

“Gotta get this dress off first,” he mutters, greedy palms wandering up beneath the hem of your dress.

You scurry to obey, helping him slide the dress off your arms and toss it away on the floor. He’s more than pleased to see that you had decided to forgo wearing a bra earlier in the day, and reaches out at once to grasp at your perked breasts in his large palm. He buries his face into your chest, catching one of your nipples between his teeth. He busies himself by marking your chest red with small nibbles until you grow impatient, tugging at the shirt he’s still wearing. He’s quick to oblige, shedding himself of his clothes; then, his nails are digging viciously into your hips as he flips the two of you over with incredible ease.

“Sit on my cock,” he snarls into your ear. “Need to feel you again.”

Legs weak from your past orgasm and the huskiness of his voice, you sidle onto his lap, tossing one thigh over his. He sits up to join you and helps push himself past your folds, though you finish by settling back on his length carefully until you’re filled to the brim. Despite already knowing what to expect from the first time around, you still shudder at the feeling, mouth unhinging as you roll your hips leisurely against his. He hardly strays from your body, instead continuing to kiss between the valley of your breasts and up to the underside of your jaw and back again. Fingers poke and prod at your body as they follow his lips, then grasp at your ass to push you closer to him each time you grind against him.

Just when you begin grinding against him in a new angle that makes you moan into his ear, a sudden noise startles the both of you but only just. It takes you both a moment to register it’s the sound of knocking on the other side of the bedroom door (that you can’t remember if Taehyung had locked, because you certainly hadn’t), followed by Jimin’s familiar voice. “Joon said he wanted us to check in on you!”

Taehyung immediately groans into your neck out of frustration, though you suspect it’s because your pace starts to stutter and not because of his bothersome friends.

“Taehyung,” You bite at your lip in an attempt to hide your moans. You tug at his hair, as if to portray what your words fail to do, but he can hear it plainly riddling your voice. The concern, and the sudden shyness, as if fearing Jimin may walk in. But part of you is thrilled at the thought, and judging by the way your unabashed cry of glee slips from your lips without much hiding is proof of that. “Oh, Tae━”

“Shit,” Taehyung’s muffled grunts of pleasure and the way his hips continue to dig into yours to meet your efforts makes you aware Jimin is the least of his current troubles. “Fucking hell━ Don’t stop.”

“Are you guys okay in there?” Now comes Hoseok’s voice, a little faint but undeniably there. Can they hear you? Do they care? They must know what’s happening beyond the door.

“They’re doing it on purpose. Fucking idiots,” Taehyung snarls as he slams his hips up into yours. A contented whimper falls from your mouth, and you cling to him tighter as you quicken your pace. Taehyung grabs at your chin, forcing you to keep your eyes fixed on him despite wandering to the door. “Look at you fucking yourself on me still even with them listening. Such a good girl, huh? So desperate for my cock, aren’t you? Gonna breed so well.”

You think Hoseok and Jimin give up and leave at some point, though you don’t recall when. Instead, in the next moment, something primitive seems to awaken in Taehyung once more and he’s shoving you onto your back on the bed. Kneeling before you, he pummels his hips into yours again and again until you’re only crying his name.

“Mine. All mine,” he growls. “Wanna feel you cum on my cock.”

So wearied from your first high, you tumble easily to your second, coming undone in a matter of seconds, spurred on by the lewd wet noises of his length thrusting into you.

“That’s it, baby,” he mutters, basking in the sound of your moans. “Fuck━ Let them all know who you belong to━”

But just when you think Taehyung has reached his own orgasm ━ sputtering for air and crescendoing in moans of your names, panting hot breath into your ear as he leans against your chest ━ he doesn’t. His thrusts become desperate and sloppy, bordering on frantic, that the soreness between your legs begins to burn. It’s an amalgamation of stubborn yet bearable pain and something harshly pleasant that has your head lolling back.

“What’s wrong?” You moan, blindly tugging at his hair. “Taehyung?”

“I can’t━” He cries out. “I can’t━ I’m so fucking hard, it hurts. I don’t know what’s wrong━”

Confused yet too tired to keep up, you reach out to smooth your fingers across his back. “It’s okay. Just let go, baby. Cum for me, Tae. Please.”

“I’m trying,” he chokes out. “I just can’t━”

Your mind works in a haze to understand what’s happening, but through it all you’re able to discern one reasonable thought. What had Taehyung said about matings and bonds? Aside from the obvious of sleeping with a mate, he had said that typically certain bonds require marking. But he had also said that marking proved to be almost irreversible, resulting in a connection so close that a pair of mates would be together forever. It was a troublesome concept to think about, especially when considering you didn’t think you were a fit match for Taehyung if only because you’re human.

But is that what he needed? The physical strain he puts himself under now to reach his high is almost unbearable to watch. So, you settle on a whim of a decision and conclude that you won’t think of any consequences until after the fact, only wanting to see the poor boy in relief.

“Tae,” You whisper. “What if you bite me?”

“I won’t,” Taehyung says through gritted teeth. His pace has slowed as he slumps against your chest in nearing defeat. “You told me not to.”

“I don’t care,” You retort. “Just bite me.”

He hesitates, lifting his gaze to look at you. When he sees your earnest zeal, he grimaces as if despising that this is his only option. Still, the look of relief that crosses his face is undeniably there. He presses his mouth against your throat, lips brushing faintly against your flesh as he grazes the smooth expanse for a spot, sharp canines poking against you. You brace yourself for the bite, though the pain isn’t as bad as you had thought. A sharp jolt runs down your spine as he sinks his teeth into your skin, and his reaction is immediate, crumbling into pitiful moans of glory.

“Fuck!” he wails. With one final slam of his hips into yours, he finally reaches his high and it’s unlike anything you have felt before. As if he begins to swell within you, his length pulsates as he cums in you to the point where you can’t help but feel so full. It overflows and leaks from your core and onto the sheets, a sticky mess that lingers even long after he’s done. Your mouth pops open at the foreign feeling, whimpering his name.

“I’m sorry,” he flinches. “I’m sorry, does it hurt?”

“No,” You manage to say. “It just… It feels so good━”

He sluggishly rides out the rest of his high until you both physically can’t take anymore. When he hears you hiss his name in a soft reminder, he apologizes once more. Then, as the room falls oddly silent, he slumps against you. He lavs his tongue over the fresh mark on your neck, the gentle motion alleviating the sting left behind. As Taehyung settles finally, he shifts his head to look up at you. You note the faint yellow hue lingering in his eyes, fading now.

“I’m sorry,” he says again. “We might have to stay like this for a while.”

“Can’t say I’m mad about that,” You croon sleepily. “You better draw me a bath after this.”

He laughs, rubbing gentle circles against your hips. “Of course. I’ll do anything for you.”

You believe him wholeheartedly when he says it, smiling against his mouth when he leans in for a kiss. His tender wandering hands over your body does wonders in calming your shrill heart, the stretch between your legs, and the bite on your neck. He nuzzles his face into your collarbones, the tip of his nose tickling against you. As your fingers rake through his hair and scratch at his head, he mewls in content.

“Is it always like that?” You ask through a stifled yawn. “You had so much energy, I could barely keep up.”

“No,” he admits groggily. “It’s only like that when you’re mated with someone.”

“What does that even mean anyway?” You ask. “To be mated with someone?”

“Well, it’s━ It’s not really a conscious decision. It sort of just happens,” Taehyung says. “It’s a connection. You gravitate towards one another. You can’t live without the other. We call it imprinting. Sometimes you’re mated to a person who doesn’t even want you, but those are rare instances.”

“So we’re the exception?”

“I thought we were,” Taehyung trails off now. He finally lifts his head to look at you, perhaps a little embarrassed. “I━ Well━ All of this, and especially the bite, doesn’t just happen ━ and definitely not with humans.”

“Oh.” You blush now, face warming under the boy’s introspective stare. “So you’re saying we’re…”

“I always thought there was a connection, but I didn’t think it meant this,” Taehyung murmurs to himself. “As crazy as it sounds, I think we were meant to be.”

“So the bite…”

You don’t finish your thought, instead already having pieced it together in your mind. It does sound crazy, but even you have felt it before. A strange connection to Taehyung, far more exceptional than simply having feelings for him. And the bite is what draws it all together, proving his point and your previous speculations about some sort of affection between the two of you.

“Are you starting to regret this now?” Taehyung asks sheepishly, a weak attempt at a joke to what he had asked you earlier in the night.

He braces himself, as if waiting for your outburst of annoyance or anger. To push him off of you and leave forever. But you do neither, instead reaching out to grasp at his face in both of your hands. You delicately lift his head, meeting his docile stare, entirely and utterly bewitched by him.

“No,” You say earnestly. “I couldn’t have asked for a better night.” A smile forms on his face, innocent and ardent in nature. “I’m just wondering how I’ll hide the mark.”

“I think there’s little to hide now after tonight,” Taehyung grins wolfishly. “Especially with the boys.”

He quivers with laughter at the sight of your scowling face and fingers poking at his sides. As he settles, he leans into your ear to hum, “I’ll make it up to you. Everything. Jaebum, the bite, the boys. But I think you should rest now. We’ll deal with all of that later.”

You don’t argue with that. You’ve already begun to fight the beginnings of sleep, eyelids drooping and itching with a need to just close them ━ and with Taehyung’s arms wrapped around you, his body emitting a pleasurable heat, you decide there’s no place else you’d rather be, moonstruck and in love.

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dreamwritesimagines · 3 years

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Burn The Witch 15 - Liar Liar [Bucky Barnes x Reader]

A.N: Thank you so much for your wonderful support and feedback my loves ! ❤ Here’s the next chapter, I hope you like it as well and please let me know what you think! ❤ Thank you! ❤❤❤

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Warnings: Enemies to lovers, fake dating, mentions of blood, sex, violence, death, manipulation, language, guns, knives.

Summary: Dishonesty requires practice.

Series Masterlist

Every spy knew things could go downhill on a mission. Considering how your last mission had ended with your ex, you weren’t exactly unfamiliar with the idea of your cover being blown but—

None of the targets were as dangerous as this one.

For a moment, you thought about pushing that button on your wristwatch and calling your whole team here because there was no way you could take down the legendary Winter Soldier in a fight, but through the haze of panic, a voice in your head told you not to.

It was just a mission.

As long as you kept your calm, you could fix this.

“Bucky,” you heard yourself say, “I can explain.”

He stared at you and the gun in his hand, then raised his brows.

“Okay,” he said, “Yeah, please explain why you have a gun.”

God damn it.

Okay, you had to think. Your cover was the naïve sweet civilian girl so any sentence you formed had to fit the description. The spy in you was already trying to come up with something, you had been taught to lie without even blinking but somehow it felt almost—

Wrong.

You tried to pull yourself together, shaking your head.

“I—it’s—“ you took a deep breath, “Yeah I have a gun.”

“I can see that,” he said drily, “Why?”

Good question.

Why would the small town sweetheart have a gun?

The cover story didn’t have anything like that, so you had to come up with a believable lie based on—

Oh. Bingo.

“I was going to tell you,” you said. “I’ve actually—I’ve had it for weeks.”

“For weeks?” he repeated, “Why?”

You ran a hand over your eyes, then crossed your arms and shrugged.

“I’m going to need more than that, Y/N.”

You gritted your teeth and raised your glances to look up at him. “After I got mugged,” you started, “I told one of my friends back home about what happened and she’s—she came up with this idea that I should maybe buy a gun because I—I don’t know. I don’t know why I bought it, I just bought it.”

“You bought a gun because your friend told you to?”

You tilted your head, “No Bucky, I bought a gun because I got mugged and got shot within the first month of moving here.”

His gaze on you was fixed, as if he was trying to see whether you were lying or not but now that panic wasn’t taking over you, you could think straight.

Bucky was a legend among the espionage world and he was unstoppable and you probably didn’t stand a chance against him yes, but you had one advantage.

Bucky was a soldier, not a spy.

Spies were different. Bucky had the physical training to go after a target, but he never, ever had to manipulate them emotionally. You were one step ahead on that and if there was anything that could get you out of this mess, that was it.

“Listen I know that you’re concerned, but you have nothing to worry about,” you waved a dismissive hand, “The guy at the shop was very helpful, he even gave me his number—”

His head shot up, “What?”

“Yeah in case I needed anything with the gun. Or if I had any questions.”

A shadow crossed his eyes and he scoffed, shaking his head.

“Did he now?”

“Yeah,” you nodded, “And besides, I watched a bunch of tutorials so I think I got it. I’m a very quick learner.”

“Tutorials?”

“Yeah, videos.”

He blinked a couple of times, and looked down at the gun before looking up at you.

“You watched videos.”

“Mm hm. One of the guys even had a deer head mounted on the wall behind him, it’s very clear he knows what he’s talking about.”

“Jesus Christ,” he muttered to himself and you had to remind yourself not to smile.

“And I know how to take the safety off,” you added, “After that point it’s basically point and pull the trigger, that’s what the video said.”

“I don’t even know where to begin— sweetheart,” he turned to you, “Forget what the video said, I can teach you if you want, but for what it’s worth, I think it’s a terrible idea.”

Hook, line and sinker.

“I hate guns,” you insisted, “It’s just that—Stacey said it’s a big city and after I got shot… I don’t know. I know I should’ve told you, I just didn’t want you to think I’m some kind of a paranoid person.”

He heaved a sigh and reached out to tug you by the hand so that he could pull you closer.

“I don’t think you’re paranoid,” he said. “I just think that you could hurt yourself or someone if you don’t have any training.”

“The guy made it sound pretty easy.”

“Yeah, I don’t think selling it was the only thing he wanted.”

You rolled your eyes at him, “Now who’s being paranoid?”

“I’m just being observant.”

“Jealous.”

“I’m not jealous,” he said and you scrunched up your nose

“Right,” you said, “Of course you’re not.”

“So is there anything I should know about?” he changed the subject, “Anything at all? I won’t judge, I swear.”

You pressed your lips together as you looked up at him. What could you say to that?

I’ve been manipulating you all along.

I’m working for the same government that is looking for you to slip and make a mistake.

When this is over, I’m probably going to hate myself much more than you hate me.

Yeah. There was absolutely nothing you could say.

“Nothing I can think of right now,” you shrugged your shoulders, “So, can we go now?”

***

You could barely remember the last time you had been to a funfair. It didn’t even matter that you already knew where you were going, you were still quite excited despite the earlier panic you had gone through. Thankfully, Bucky seemed to have bought into your story but it didn’t mean you weren’t taking mental notes about what to do by the time the date was over.

Or when you were out of his sight, whichever.

“Thank you!” you said what it felt for the hundredth time as you put a piece of cotton candy into your mouth, enjoying the sweet taste melting in your mouth and Bucky smiled at you fondly.

“No problem darling.”

“No seriously, I haven’t been to a funfair in…I don’t know, forever!” you said, “Wait, so it was a thing back then?”

“Hm?”

“Bringing your date to a funfair?”

He nodded, walking beside you, “Yeah. There wasn’t much to do and you know, lots of people.”

“So no gossip?”

“Lots of gossip,” he corrected you, “But at least—“

“No one’s virtue got damaged.”

“You’re never going to let that go, are you?”

“Nope,” you grinned at him and gasped when something caught your eye, making him turn his head.

“What?”

“Oh my God!” you pointed at the huge neon sign and he followed your gaze, then scoffed a laughter.

“Seriously?”

“I want to try it.”

“Shoot The Ducks.” He read out loud, “You know what, let’s see how good you are if you watched that many videos.”

“I’m going to get that teddy bear,” you pointed at the biggest teddy bear sitting on the top shelf while he looked like he was fighting a laugh.

“Are you sure you can carry that?”

“You’re going to carry it for me,” you said as you handed him the cotton candy, your nose in the air and tugged him by the wrist to lead him to the shooting range. You took a look at the paper ducks with bullseye on them, then turned to the man behind the counter.

“Excuse me, how many of those should I shoot to get that?” you asked, motioning at the teddy bear and the man looked up.

“3 sets, all bullseye.”

“Okay,” you said and reached for your purse but Bucky had already paid the man by the time you could get your wallet out. He gave you the toy rifle and you had to remind yourself you were supposed to be terrible at it no matter how much you wanted that goddamn plushie.

The good thing about being an expert sniper was that you knew exactly how to miss and look like an amateur. So you pointed the rifle slightly to the right and took your shot, and as expected you missed.

“No!” you whined and Bucky stifled a chuckle, but adapted a look of seriousness as soon as you turned around to look at him with your eyes narrowed.

“I said nothing.”

“That was just bad luck,” you insisted, then took your shot again, deliberately missing once more. You lowered the rifle, pouting.

“I’m pretty sure this is rigged.”

“Or maybe the guy with the deer head on his wall had no idea what he was talking about,” Bucky pointed out, “Almost like watching videos isn’t enough to figure out how to shoot, wouldn’t you say?”

“I’m glad you’re enjoying this.”

“On the contrary, I am a little terrified now that I know you have a gun," he taunted you, “And seeing this…”

You glared at him and took your shot, missing again and you heaved a sigh, lowering the rifle again.

“Better luck next time miss,” the man said and you offered him a small smile. Bucky heaved a sigh as if he was fighting himself.

“Which one did you say you wanted again?” he asked and you pulled your brows together, then pointed at the huge teddy bear. He nodded at the guy and handed him some cash after giving you your cotton candy back, then grabbed the toy rifle from the man and in only a couple of seconds, he had hit every single bullseye, making your jaw drop.

Okay.

You were so screwed.

You knew that he was a great super soldier but seeing it was something else. A shiver ran down your spine as what you had read on his file flashed before your eyes. You were right earlier, you had to make sure to avoid any kind of combat with him by the time this whole mission was over.

“Y/N?”

Your head shot up and you tried to pull yourself together, letting out a breath.

“Wow,” you managed to say and the man behind the counter gawked between you two.

“Um— that one please?” you said and he blinked a couple of times, then reached out to take the teddy bear down to put it into your arms. You let out a small squeal of glee, then beamed at Bucky.

“Thank you!” you said, trying to keep your nervousness hidden and he smiled.

“No problem,” he motioned at you and you gave the teddy to him so that you could hold your cotton candy better. You shook your head slightly, distracting yourself with the sweetness on your tongue but a small laughter escaped from your lips when you took a look at the sight beside you.

The scary Winter Soldier holding a huge teddy bear in his arms.

“What?”

“Nothing,” you managed to say, “I’m going to name him Bucky.”

“No you’re not.”

“Fine, I’m going to name him Grumpy,” you said, “Same deal.”

“Hey!” he protested and you giggled, then looked around.

“Come on,” you said, grabbing his hand, “Let’s go to the Ring Toss!”

***

It was as if the time was going faster on your every single date with Bucky. Even after spending hours in that funfair until midnight, you were still quite giddy when you and Bucky reached your building. You let out a giggle as you turned around and took the huge teddy bear from him, hugging it tight.

“Thank you,” you said, looking up at him, “Really. I…I think it was the best that I’ve ever had.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah!” you said, “And now I have to find something equally amazing for a modern date, so no pressure.”

He chuckled, “You don’t have to find anything,” he said, “I’d be happy just being with you, not doing anything.”

Warmth filled your insides and you smiled.

“Really?”

“Really,” he nodded and you put the teddy bear down, then stood on your tiptoes to pull him down to a kiss.

His arm wrapped around your waist and you found yourself sighing as his other hand cupped your cheek. A fire – a very, very familiar fire started burning at the pit of your stomach as you felt yourself melt at his touch, every single doubt about the mission and the strategies and everything else wiping out of your mind until desire was the only thing left. He brushed your hair behind your ear as you pulled back and looked up at him, the same fire burning in his eyes but he was better than you at hiding it so a gentle smile pulled at his lips.

Fuck what the strategy report says.

“Um—“ you took a deep breath, “Would you want to come upstairs for...a cup of coffee or something?”

He looked almost surprised at the suggestion but for what it was worth, he overcame that quite fast. His gaze stopped on you for a moment before he nodded.

“Yeah,” he said, “Yeah I’d love to.”

A nervous laughter escaped from you and you nodded,

“Okay—“ you started but before you could say anything, his phone started ringing. He closed his eyes for a moment and took it out of his pocket to answer it.

“This is not a good time man,” he said, but his frown deepened as he listened to the other line, “Right now? Are you serious?”

You tilted your head and he heaved a deep sigh while the person told him something you couldn’t hear.

“Fine,” he muttered, “I’ll be there.”

Oh God damn it.

“Let me guess,” you said when he hung up, “Change of plans?”

He ran a hand over his eyes and nodded.

“Sam says there’s this group of people in need of help…” he grumbled, putting the phone into his pocket, “But somebody better be dying because if not, I can fix that really fast.”

You let out a laugh, “Don’t be like that,” you said, “It’s fine. I told you, I’m not going anywhere. Go save lives.”

“I’m really sorry darling.”

“It’s fine,” you repeated with a smile and pecked him on the lips before picking up the huge teddy bear. “But be careful, you hear me?”

“Yes ma’am,” he saluted and you blew him a kiss before walking into the building. You took the elevator, still holding the teddy tight and as soon as you got to your floor you stepped out.

“What the hell is that?” Keith’s voice reached you and you tilted your head to look around the teddy’s arm to see him by his door, as if he was just leaving.

“It’s a teddy bear,” you said, walking to your door to open it, Keith following you into the apartment.

“What’s in it?” he asked, “Weapons? Guns? Knives?”

“…Fiber.”

“Y/N—” he started but you put it on the floor and took a step back.

“Where are you going?”

“General gave me a mission,” he said, “You seriously want me to believe you just got a teddy bear just because?”

“I was on a date.”

“Oh,” he said, “Romantic. It would be a great way to hide weapons though, even you have to admit—”

“Bucky found my gun.”

Keith stopped talking and stared at you for a couple of seconds, “I beg your pardon?”

You rubbed at your eyes, “You heard me. He found my gun.”

“Why the hell did you not alert me?”

“There was no need.”

Keith threw his head back, “Are you serious right now?” he asked you, “This is the freaking Winter Soldier we’re talking about, you’re not supposed to take any chances! For God’s sake, I live next door for a reason!”

“My cover wasn’t blown,” you insisted, “If you or the team got here, all this would’ve been for nothing. I handled it.”

He crossed his arms, “Still an unnecessary risk to take,” he insisted, “Anything could’ve happened, Y/N. You’ve read his file.”

You nodded, “I handled it,” you said, “You should go by the way. You’re going to be late, the General hates that.”

“Do you want me to say anything to him?”

You thought for a moment and shook your head.

“No,” you said, “Good luck.”

“We will talk about this when I came back.” he pointed at you and left your apartment. You took a look at the teddy bear, then grabbed your phone to touch Chloe’s name.

“Hey there!” she answered on the first ring, “How was the funfair?”

“It was good,” you said, “Listen, I need you to make sure my background is solid.”

“What?” she asked, “It is, I made sure of that—“

“Bucky found my gun,” you said, “Earlier.”

She took in a sharp breath, “God damn it.”

“No it’s fine, I came up with this story of buying it from a shop after the mugging, but…”

“You need a document just in case,” she completed your sentence, “Got it. Do you think he would check?”

“No,” you said, “But Wilson might, he and Bucky are pretty close. It would be much harder to trick him.”

“Got it,” she said, “I’ll get the document ready, maybe some footage… And I’ll go over your social media just in case.”

“Great.”

“But are you okay?”

You paused only for a moment,

“Sure,” you said, “I’m fine, I handled it. It’s all going according to plan.”

“Alright,” she said, “I’d better get to it. Be careful!”

“You too,” you said and hung up, then went to the kitchen to grab a couple of knives before going back to the living room.

“Sorry about this Bucky number two,” you murmured as you turned it around, stuck the knife into it and started ripping it, “But you really would make a good place to hide weapons.”

Chapter 16

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #the falcon and the winter soldier #tfatws #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes x you

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spockandawe · 3 years

Text

Well, this is interesting! So, in that post yesterday, there was one line that really baffled me, a thing about people brushing off a character as an asshole “because he shows literally zero growth.” I kind of set that aside because it was such a weird non-sequitur, and guessed that it was just someone’s sentences not quite keeping up with their train of thought, which has happened to me many times. Apparently I was wrong! I already spent long enough on that one post, I’m tired of talking about that, but this is new and interesting.

Okay. I kind of wanted to see if I could talk about this purely in terms of abstracts and not characters, but I don’t think it’ll work. It would be frustrating to write and confusing to read. It’s about Jiang Cheng. Right up front: This isn’t about whether or not he’s an abuser. Frankly, I don’t think it’s relevant. This also isn’t about telling people they should like him. I don't care whether anyone else likes him or not. But I do like him, and I am always fascinated by dissecting the reasons that people disagree with me. And the process of Telling Stories is my oldest hyperfixation I remember, which will become relevant in a minute.

I thought I had a good grasp on this one, you know? Jiang Cheng makes it pretty obvious why people would dislike Jiang Cheng. But then the posts I keep stumbling over were making weird points, culminating in that “literally zero growth” line.

So! What happened is that someone wrote up a post about how Jiang Cheng’s character arc isn’t an arc, it’s stagnation. It’s a pretty interesting read, and I broadly agree with the larger point! The points where I would quibble are like... the idea that it’s absolute stagnation, as opposed to very subtle shifts that still make a material difference. But still, cool! The post was also offered up as a reason why OP was uninterested in writing any more Jiang Cheng meta, which I totally get. I’m not tired of him yet, but I definitely understand why someone who isn’t a fan of his would get tired about writing about a character with a very static arc. Okay!

Now, internet forensics are hard. I desperately wish I had more information about this evolution, because I find this stuff fascinating, but I have no good way to find things said in untagged posts, reblogs, or private/external venues. But as far as I can tell, that “literally zero growth” wasn’t just a slip of the tongue, it’s become fashionable for people to say that Jiang Cheng is an abusive asshole (that it’s fucked up to like) because he doesn’t have a character arc.

Asshole? Yes. Abusive? This post still isn’t about that. This is about it being fucked up to like this character because he did bad things and had a static character arc.

At first, that point of view was still deeply confusing to me. But I think I figured out the idea at the core of it, and now I’m only baffled. I’m not super interested in confirming this directly, because the people making the most noise about this have not inspired confidence in their ability to hold a civil conversation and I’m a socially anxious binch, but I think the idea is: ‘This character did Bad Things, and then did not improve himself.’

Which is alarmingly adjacent to that old favorite standard of ‘This piece of fiction is glorifying Bad Thing.’ I haven’t seen anyone accusing mxtx of something something jiang cheng, only the people who read/watched/heard the story and became invested in the Jiang Cheng character, but things kind of add up, you know?

Like I said, I don’t want to arbitrate anyone’s right to like/dislike Jiang Cheng. That’s such a fucking waste of time. But this is fascinating to me, because it’s like..... so obviously new and sudden, with such a clear originating point. I can’t speak to the Chinese fans, obviously, but exiledrebels started translating in... what, 2017? And only now, in 2021, do people start putting forth Jiang Cheng’s flat character arc as a “reason” that he’s bad? I’m not going to argue if he pings you in the abuse place, I’m not a dick. I’m not going to argue if you just dislike his vibes. I’m just over here on my blog and in the tag enjoying myself, feel free to detour around me. But oh my god, it’s so silly to try to tell other people that they shouldn’t like him because he has a static character arc.

I want to talk about stories. I don’t know how much I’ll be able to say, because it’s impossible to make broad, sweeping statements, because there are stories about change, there are stories about lack of change, there are all kinds of media that can be used to tell stories, and standards for how stories are told and what they emphasize vary across cultures and over time. But I think that what I can say is that telling a story requires... compromise. It requires streamlining. Trying to capture all the detail of life would slow down most stories to an unbearable degree. Consider organically telling someone ‘I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich’ versus the computer science exercise of having students describe, step by step, how to make one (spread peanut butter? but you never said you opened the lid)

Hell, I’ve got an example in mdzs itself. The largely-faceless masses of the common people. If someone asks you to think about it critically like, yes, obviously these are people, living their own lives, with their own desires, sometimes suffering and dying in the wake of the novel plot. But does the story give weight to those deaths? Or does it just gloss by? Yes, it references their suffering occasionally, but it is not the focus, and it would slow the story unbearably to give equal weight to each dead person mentioned.

Does Wei Wuxian’s massacre get given the same slow, careful consideration as Su She’s, or Jin Guangyao’s? No, because taking the time to weigh our protagonist with ‘well, this one was a mother, and her youngest son had just started walking, but now he’s going to grow up without remembering her face. that one only became an adult a few months ago, he still hasn’t been on many night-hunts yet, but he finds it so rewarding to protect the common people. oh, and this one had just gotten engaged, but don’t worry, his fiancee won’t mourn him, because she died here as well.’ And continuing on that way to some large number under 3000? No! Unless your goal is to make the reader feel bad for cheering for a morally grey hero, that would be a bad authorial decision! The book doesn’t ignore the issue, it comes up, Wei Wuxian gets called out about all the deaths he’s responsible for, but that’s not the same as them being given equal emotional weight to one (1) secondary character, and I don’t love this new thing where people are pretending that’s equivalent.

When Wei Wuxian brutally kills every person at the Wen supervisory office, are you like ‘holy shit... so many grieving families D:’ or are you somewhere between vindicated satisfaction and an ‘ooh, yikes’ wince? Odds are good you’re somewhere in the satisfaction/wince camp, because that’s what the story sets you up to feel, because the story has to emphasize its priorities (priorities vary, but ‘plot’ and ‘protagonist’ are common ones, especially for a casual novel read like this)

Now, characters. If you want to write a story with a sweeping, epic scale, or if you want to tightly constrain the number of people your story is about, I guess it’s possible to give everyone involved a meaningful character arc. Now.... is it always necessary? Is it always possible? Does it always make sense? No, of course not. If you want to do that, you have to devote real estate to it, and depending on the story you want to tell, it could very possibly be a distraction from your main point, like the idea of mxtx tenderly eulogizing every single character who dies even incidentally. Lan Qiren doesn’t get a loving examination of his feelings re: his nephews and wei wuxian and political turnover in the cultivation world because it’s not relevant, and also, because his position is pretty static until right near the end of the story. Lan Xichen is arguably one of the most static characters within the book, he seems like the same nice young between Gusu and the present, right up until... just before the end of the story.

You may see where I’m heading with this.

Like, just imagine trying to demand that every important character needs to go through a major life change before the end of your book or else it didn’t count. This just in, Granny Weatherwax and Nanny Ogg go through multiple novels without experiencing radical shifts in who they are, stop liking them immediately. I do get that the idea is that Jiang Cheng was a ~bad person~ who didn’t change, but asdgfsd I thought we were over the handwringing over people being allowed to like ““bad”” fictional characters. The man isn’t even a canonical serial killer, he’s not my most problematic fave even within this novel.

And here is where it’s a little more relevant that I would quibble with that original post about Jiang Cheng’s arc. He’s consistently a mean girl, but he goes from stressed, sharp-edged teenager, to grief-stricken, almost-destroyed teen, to grim, cold young adult (and then detours into grim, cold, and grief-stricken until grief dulls with time). He does become an attentive uncle tho. He..... doesn’t experience a radical change in his sense of self, which... it’s...... not all that strange for an adult. And bam, then he DOES experience a radical change, but the needs of the plot dictate that it’s right near the end. And he’s not the focus of the story, baby, wangxian is. He has the last few lines of the story, which nicely communicate his changes to me, but also asdfafas we’re out of story. He was never the main character, it’s not surprising we don’t linger! The extras aren’t beholden to the needs of plot, but they’re also about whatever mxtx wanted to write, and I guess she didn’t feel like writing about Jiang Cheng ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

But also. Taking a step backward. Stable characters can fill a perfectly logical place in a story. Like, look at Leia Organa. I’m not saying she has no arc, but I am saying that she’s a solid point of reference as Luke is becoming a jedi and Han is adjusting his perspective. I wouldn’t call her stagnant, the vibes are wrong, but she also isn’t miserable in her sadness swamp, the way Jiang Cheng is.

Or, hell, look at tgcf. The stagnant, frozen nature of the big bad is a central feature of the story. The bwx of now is the bwx of 800 years ago is the bwx of 1500+ years ago. This is not the place for a meta on how that was bad for those around him and for him himself, but I have Thoughts about how being defeated at the end is both a thing that hurts him and relieves him. Mei Nianqing is a sympathetic character who’s also pretty darn static. Does Ling Wen have a character arc, or do we just learn more about who she already is and what her priorities always were? I’m going to cut myself off here, but a character’s delta between the beginning of a story and the end of a story is a reasonable way to judge how interesting writing character meta is, and is a very silly metric to judge their worth, and even if I guessed at what the basic logic is, for this character, I am still baffled that it’s being put forth as a real talking point.

(also, has it jumped ship to any other characters yet? have people started applying it in other fandoms as well? please let me know if this is the case, I am wildly curious)

(no, but really, if anyone is arguing that bwx is gross specifically because he had centuries to self-reflect and didn’t fix himself, i am desperate to know)

And finally. The thing I thought was most self-evident. Did I post about this sometime recently? If a non-central character experiences a life-altering paradigm shift right near the end of the story (without it being lingered over, because non-central character), oh my god. As a fic writer? IT’S FREE REAL ESTATE. This is the most fertile possible ground. If I want to write post-canon canon-compliant material, adsgasfasd that’s where I’m going to be looking. Okay, yeah, the main couple is happy, that’s good. Who isn’t happy, and what can I do about that? Happy families are all alike, while every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way, etc.

It’s not everyone’s favorite playground, but come on, these are not uncommon feelings. And frankly, it’s starting to feel a little disingenuous when people act like fan authors pick out the most blameless angel from the cast and lavish good things upon them. I’m not the only one who goes looking for a good dumpster fire and says I Live Here Now. If I write post-canon tgcf fic, it’s very likely to focus on beef and/or leaf. I have written more than one au focusing on tianlang-jun.

And, hilariously. If the problem with Jiang Cheng. Is that he is a toxic man fictional character who failed to grow on his own, and is either unsafe or unhealthy to be around. If the problem is that he did not experience a character arc. If these people would be totally fine with other people liking him, if he improved himself as a person. And then, if authors want to put in the (free! time-consuming!) work of writing that character development themselves. You would think that they would be lauded for putting the character through healthier sorts of personal growth than he experienced in canon. Instead, I am still here writing this because first, I was bothered by these authors being named as “freaks” who are obsessed with their ‘uwu precious tsundere baby’ with a “love language of violence,” and then I was graciously informed that people hate Jiang Cheng because he experiences no character growth.

#jiang cheng #mdzs #the untamed #disk horse #long post/#abuse/#only tangentially #but better safe than sorry i hope

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taggedmemes · 3 years

Text

SENTENCE MEME ⟶ REIGN / 1.01 always feel free to tweak the sentence to fit your muse.

“She’s coming.”

“You must leave immediately.”

“This was an assassination attempt.”

“You were nearly poisoned.”

“They’ll be found and dealt with.”

“I don’t know if I’m ready.”

“He will love you.”

“I’m not sure that matters.”

“It’s the perfect occasion to showcase the alliance.”

“Too many alliances make a king look weak.”

“You’ve chosen my wife –– have you set the date, too?”

“You don’t sound very enthusiastic.”

“She had skinny legs, a missing front tooth, and strong opinions.”

“The opinions you can ignore.”

“I may not have been born with a crown, but this country relies on my money.”

“Let him talk like a king.”

“I want her to bear sons as soon as possible, or what is a wife’s value?”

“What do your visions say about his future?”

“Tell me, what have you seen?”

“Perhaps if you were more specific about your concerns.”

“How do I control a daughter-in-law who’s a queen in her own right?”

“Is that what bothers you, her power? Or the fact that she’s young and pretty?”

“I’ve just had a vision. I see you beheaded at my command.”

“Be patient. Answers will come.”

“Didn’t the nuns teach you anything?”

“I’m making up in volume for what I lack in station, I suppose.”

“Unlike her, you’ll have no trouble finding husbands here.”

“We’ll certainly enjoy the hunt.”

“Make no mistake.”

“Alliances can shift.”

“I hear the king favors him.”

“The castle seems bigger, is that possible?”

“I was always chasing after you when we were young.”

“She will cost them their life.”

“He has no teeth and speaks very quickly.”

“You know what I’d like to do? Explore.”

“There’s something I want to see.”

“I make knives and swords.”

“Is that a requirement for future kings now?”

“I can’t help thinking that every man, even a king, should have some kind of skill.”

“You’re going to be a great ruler someday.”

“I want a real skill, one I didn’t inherit, one that wasn’t given to me and can’t be taken away.”

“He wants to learn something, he does. He wants to go somewhere, he goes.”

“They don’t worry about him dying so much that they don’t let him live.”

“I can milk a goat.”

“I can cut peat for the fire.”

“I could always get by as a blacksmith.”

“That’s a very kind offer, but I hope I never have to take you up on it.”

“Did anyone see you come in here?”

“Nothing’s changed here, nothing has to.”

“I brought you something to decorate your swords with.”

“Now’s not a good time.”

“Kings do not answer to their wives.”

“You do not leave the castle alone.”

“Do not go into those woods, do you hear me?”

“What’s in the woods?”

“You’d rather be at the convent, eating porridge and trudging through mud.”

“I quite like the way mud feels underfoot.”

“Maybe you’ll be sent back to the nuns for misbehaving.”

“You should ask him why he’s such a moody, arrogant ass.”

“Nothing in common but our father, really.”

“I’ll mention your discontent to them.”

“I’ve been thinking of you since the moment you got on that boat.”

“I borrowed money and left the next day.”

“I want you to stay but we’ll be found out.”

“What a grand, romantic gesture.”

“What a rise your people have made.”

“I do love a success story.”

“He has a terrible reputation with women.”

“He knows no bounds.”

“I’ll tell the servants you’re ready to be bathed and dressed.”

“Taste of love and sorrow, but don’t drink the wine.”

“We’re very happy to be back at court.”

“Beautiful evening, is it not?”

“He’s just paying his respects.”

“We’re overrun by Scots.”

“It’s time for consummation, the ritual, the ceremony, the mystery.”

“Don’t you want to know what you’re in for someday?”

“We’re the only ones who matter here.”

“Go before anyone sees us.”

“I’ve been wanting to talk to you.”

“There’s something I need to say to you.”

“There were other ways of handling this.”

“You do realize we’re going to be married someday.”

“We’ve been engaged since we were six.”

“You’re beautiful and clever and unpredictable.”

“What matters is what’s right for my country.”

“I’m going to be king someday, responsible for my people.”

“You don’t want to marry me.”

“I know it’s not what you want to hear.”

“You won’t love me.”

“Love is irrelevant to people like us.”

“We who are so privileged in so many ways with that.”

“All I’m asking you to do is wait.”

“You aren’t the only one with a country to think of.”

“What possible defense could he have given you?”

“He said he was forced, he wouldn’t say by whom.”

“He said there are powerful people behind this.”

“He looked so surprised that I would fight back.”

“I thank you for your protection last night.”

“If there was any misunderstanding, if I sent the wrong message in my joy..”

“If anyone knew you were even asking this...”

“Gossip poisons, too.”

“You may have behaved foolishly, but you are not responsible for your countryman’s actions.”

“This was not an act of passion.”

“He was beheaded this morning.”

“I don’t know who to believe or to trust.”

“Anyone who’s close to you lives in constant danger.”

“We’re disposable, all of us.”

“We’re here in service to you, whatever the means, whatever the costs us.”

“You can’t even protect yourself.”

“You’re not alone.”

“Take care, or you will bleed for a girl who will never be yours.”

“You think I was with him to get back at you?”

“I think you’re impulsive and prideful.”

“Leave it be, I beg of you.”

“You can’t behave like this.”

“You have no intention of marrying me.”

“I was thinking about myself, my friends, my safety.”

“You could have ruined your reputation.”

“How would we want things to go?”

“If you weren’t the future king and I was just a girl, would you want this?”

“You said the potion would make her sleep like the dead.”

“One glass of wine and she’d wake with her virtue destroyed.”

“There was nothing wrong with my potion.”

“It was the delivery that failed.”

“He would have implicated me, and you.”

“Have your visions altered?”

“She will bring his death.”

“You must continue to sacrifice.”

“I don’t know who you are or why you hide, but your warning saved me.”

“Danger surrounds me here and I am in your debt.”

“Are you in danger, too?”

#memes #sentence meme #sentence starters #rp meme #rp starters #KIND / IN CHARACTER.#BASED ON / TV SHOW.#KIND / SENTENCE.

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stardustprompts · 2 years

Text

the king of crows ( book 4 of the diviners series ) - libby bray sentence starters change tenses/pronouns as needed !! some lines have been edited for clarity / length / ease of roleplaying tw ; death , suicide idealization

‘did anyone ever tell you that you sleep with your mouth open?’

‘you two. I don’t know whether to hope you get married or hope you never do.’

‘if this goes badly, don’t you dare come back and haunt me.’

‘doesn’t matter what’s true. it matters what people think is true.’

‘well, if there’s going to be drama, i’m all in.’

‘for the first time in my life, I got something to lose.’

‘I know from experience that saying no to you is a full time job.’

‘he only cares about power. he only cares about winning, no matter the cost.’

‘let’s fight fire with fire.’

‘you want to remake the world in your image, like a malevolent god?’

‘stop joking around. this is serious.’

‘you think your institutions will save you? they’re part of this.’

‘who died and made you boss?’

‘you’re still playing by their rules. you’ll never get anywhere that way.’

‘if trouble’s gonna come calling it won’t find me at home. it’ll have to chase me down first.’

‘i just don’t know how we make things work between us.’

‘please, please don’t hate me. I couldn’t bear it.’

‘you’re always you. always honest.’

‘i’ll kill you. I swear I will.’

‘greatness requires some sacrifices.’

‘i’m just saying, some doors are very good closed.’

‘well, I’m sorry I’m not as clever as you are.’

‘nobody’s who they say they are.’

‘if we survive this, you are dead to me.’

‘I can’t tell if that was a compliment or an insult.’

‘there’s things out there. and they’re coming for us.’

‘I will kiss you as much as you like.’

‘i’m afraid this isn’t real. i’m afraid in a minute i’ll wake up and i’ll be here but you won’t be.’

‘i’m here, (name), and I promise I will never leave you again.’

‘are you sure you should be doing that? after all you’ve been through?’

‘I like the way you apologize.’

‘don’t get used to it. i’m very rarely wrong.’

‘how are you gonna fight if you don’t believe there’s any goodness in this world worth saving?’

‘why are we trying to save this country? what’s it ever done for us? maybe we should just let it burn.’

‘you got me, didn’t you? your life couldn’t have gone too wrong.’

‘our last words to each other were angry. it haunts me. I wish I could undo it.’

‘it haunts me. I wish I could undo it.’

‘you know what heroes do? they pay attention.’

‘you really could make a joke of anything, couldn’t you?’

‘you aren’t invited to comment on everything in my life.’

‘I want better for you. you deserve happiness.’

‘whatever you do, will you come back to me?’

‘what were you thinking? were you trying to be dumb?’

‘am i the only one here with a lick of common sense?’

‘we might be spending too much time together.’

‘when you put it that way, sounds like we don’t have a chance in hell.’

‘i’m not cocky. can I help it if I’m just that good?’

‘I hate maps. and directions. and rules.’

‘they don’t want to hear what you have to say. this is what they want: blood.’

‘who wants to etch their name into this story?’

‘I was having the most beautiful dream. I was … happy.’

‘I told you. but you never did listen to me, did you?’

‘I was afraid I’d never see you again.’

‘I told you that you’d be sorry.’

‘what happens if such power goes unchecked?’

‘i’m not telling anyone about this. and you’re not gonna, either.’

‘fine, no hurry. it’s only the end of the world we’re worried about here.’

‘I can face just about anything. but I can’t do it without you.’

‘the world is a terrible place. it never learns.’

‘I used to think I wouldn’t care if I died. I just kept throwing myself at life, hoping I’d hit the bullseye eventually. I thought death would be a relief from all that feeling.’

‘I used to think I wouldn’t care if I died. I thought death would be a relief from all that feeling. a relief not to have to feel all that pain. not to care so much.’

‘you think you’re the only one who ever feels that way?’

‘how do you go on… with all that loneliness inside you?’

‘you know, I really thought this was going to be a much more romantic conversation.’

‘I invented trouble. I know how it works.’

‘(name), would you marry me?’

‘I always believed you and I would be special together, but now I know it’s true.’

‘I don’t suppose you could be happy for me, could you?’

‘you and I weren’t meant to be.’

‘that’s what he wants, to get you good and scared. so you won’t fight back.’

‘I don’t think one joke will be the end of us.’

‘something is wrong. don’t you feel it?’

‘i’m not yelling. I’m just … nudging.’

‘it was everything I was afraid of.’

‘maybe we need to lose control sometimes.’

‘I used to feel numb a lot.’

‘i’m so angry all the time.’

‘I don’t know what to do with all these feelings coming up inside me. I don’t know where to put them.’

‘life isn’t always fair, and the choices we make sometimes aren’t always clean.’

‘we can’t do anything about other people do. we can only do right by what we believe.’

‘it’s a hard path to be who you are and try to put your best self into a world that doesn’t always show thanks for it.’

‘you ever wonder if maybe we’re on the wrong side of history?’

‘you’re lying. you’re a liar. nobody likes liars.’

‘you take and you take and you take! well, you can’t have him—- I won’t let you!’

‘nothing about this is natural. it’s an unnatural world.’

‘we’ll always have (name) that way, and we’ll carry him around with us forever.’

‘you and me. if they come for one of us, they come for all of us.’

‘in addition to being a lousy fellow, you’re also a goddamned idiot.’

‘I will make you a swell little medal if we survive.’

‘sometimes you just gotta burn something down so you can build something else in its place.’

‘you were selfish. you are selfish.’

‘that’s all we are in the end. stories.’

‘will you remember me fondly?’

‘i’ve taken nothing that people weren’t willing to give me. out of greed. out of anger. out of fear.’

‘you did have a choice. you made it.’

don’t waste it. make a good life.’

‘I was afraid I’d lose you.’

#the diviners sentence starters #the diviners prompts #rp sentence starters #rp memes #rp prompts #1920s prompts #literature sentence starters #literature prompts

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parvulous-writings · 3 years

Text

Medbay magic // Angela Ziegler (Mercy) x Reader

Request: Ello, It's me,Ya bor. So I wanted to request a lil' something- Can we get a one shot where Angela (Mercy, for those of yall that don't know (: )nurses the reader back to health, but ends up falling for the reader with all the time they spend together? Then she's super confused about her feelings and doesn't know what to do about it, and she's too scared to tell the reader, but... turns out the reader has always kinda liked Angela too, and they confess to Angela-And they all live happily ever after- 😭🤌No but fr ily bor ❤

Requested by: @rey-is-not-a-skywalker

Summary: The reader and Doctor Ziegler develop feelings for each other :)

Warnings: N/A

Words: 1.3K

Notes: I would like to thank one of my old classmates for the word soup conversation :) My requests are currently open! My pinned post (found here) contains both a list of characters I write for, and a masterlist!

Not my gif

You had been in the medical bay for nearly a week now. It wasn’t so bad, you supposed, you were being looked after well enough. You were frequently seen by several different doctors, one whom you greatly preferred over the others. Your favourite doctor was none other than Angela Ziegler, the best medic on the force. This wasn’t just your opinion either, this was just a common fact that everyone accepted. Under her care you had been nursed back from near death to almost perfect health. You swore on your own life that she was magic, it was like nothing you had ever seen. That wasn’t the only magic she used though, you were sure of it. She had managed to work her way into your heart as well, and you held her higher than any other.

During your time in the medbay, you had several deep conversations with Angela, when there wasn’t all that much for her to do, and she needed something to keep her mind busy. Most of the time they started as nonsense words that she would respond to fondly- word soup, she dubbed it. It was mostly obscure facts or some line of thought that didn’t make much sense. Angela’s personal favourite conversation was one from when you were half sedated due to the pain of your wounds, and you started spouting drivel about Sciron- an old figure in Greek mythology, who would ask passers by to help him was his feet. When they knelt before him, he would suddenly give them a kick over the cliff into the sea, where the victim's body was devoured by a huge monstrous sea turtle which used to swim under the rocks. How you remembered about such an obscure figure in common knowledge Ziegler didn’t know, but your words were even stranger. “What if the turtle was Sciron’s brother?” You posed, staring up at the ceiling as Angela patted down your bed, making sure you were comfortable. She laughed quietly at the absurd idea and shook her head slowly. “As interesting as the theory is, I do not think that that is what the Greeks were striving for when telling that tale...” “But why else would he feed the turtle, well, people?” “I do not know- but there are many instances of strange stories such as this, yes?” “I s’pose so..” You mumbled, pursing your lips in thought. “But like it could be his half brother, right? Cause that would explain-” “Quiet down now, you need rest, not stress over fiction turtles and the men who feed them.”

Why was this Angela’s most fondly remembered conversation? Purely because of it’s ridiculousness. It wasn’t often that such strange topics popped up; no matter what Captain Amari would have had people believe. Plus you didn’t remember it, and thus she could use it to entertain you in future.

Soon enough, Angela was conflicted as she walked to deliver you the news of your discharge from the medical bay. She was happy for you; she understood how frustrating it can be to be cooped up in one place for any prolonged amount of time. But she was almost... Melancholy, beneath that joy. With you leaving the medbay, she was unsure when she’d get to see you properly next. She didn’t get much free time when off the field or out of the medbay. Most of that free time was spent taking care of herself and her mental health, and was often only late at night. She wanted to spend more time with you so badly, that it made her heart practically ache from the thought of not seeing you for an extended amount of time. She had become enamoured with you, as unprofessional as that was. As she approached your bed, clipboard in hand, she took a deep breath. She forced a wide smile onto her angelic features, and cleared her throat to capture your attention when she got close enough. “Any news, Doc?” You ask with a small smile, to which she nods. “Yes, actually. You’ve finally been deemed fit to leave the med bay.” At this information you looked rather happy, and Angela couldn’t fault you for such a feeling.

As you started to sit up and swing your legs over the side of the bed, Ziegler also moved round to offer you some help should you require it. Your legs are a little weak after staying in bed for so long, so you are a little wobbly when you first get to your feet, but you don’t fall over, which is a very good sign in Angela’s eyes. “Thank you, Angela...” You smile at her, referring to everything she had done for you during your time in the medical ward. “Bitte.” She replied, quite curtly. “Before you go, actually, there’s a couple of things I’d like to talk to you about...” Your brows furrow as she keeps talking. “Is... Is something wrong?” “No, no, not at all.” Angela assured you, understanding why you may be anxious about her words- usually when doctors or medical practitioners say something like that it’s never really good. “Far from it, actually.” This put your mind partially at ease, but not by much. She tried to give you what was an encouraging smile, but all it really managed to do was set your heart a-fluttering. Angela cleared her throat quietly. “So- it may seem a little bit out of the blue for me to say something like this, I am well aware.” She started, trying to keep herself calm as she started to open up a little bit. “During your time under my care, I have... Grown rather fond of you; attached even.” With every word that passed her lips, you found yourself more and more awestruck. You silence seemed to unnerve Ziegler, causing her nerves to skyrocket. She remained outwardly calm, though. She didn’t know what to add to what she had said to improve it or make it less awkward, so she just stood there, tapping her fingers anxiously against the others.

“Really?” Is all you can think to ask, your voice laced with an incredulous wonder that sounded closely akin to adoration. You would have asked if she were joking, but you knew very well that Angela wouldn’t joke about something like this. “I...” You trailed off, trying to think of how to phrase your next sentence adequately. “I’m rather fond of you too.” You settled to using her own words to describe your feelings. The look on Angela’s face told you that she probably didn’t think she’d get this far. “Oh...” She seemed at loss for words.

You both stood their for a moment, trying to think of what to say to each other in light of these revelations. After about a minute or so, you broke the silence. “So.. Would you want to get a coffee, or tea sometime?” Your words seemed to break Angela out of a daze, and she gave you a rather large smile. “Ah, yes, that would be lovely... Tea, and maybe some chocolates? I can bring some Swiss chocolate... It’s the best.” She told you with a quiet chuckle, and you nodded eagerly. “That sounds good to me... What about time- when are you free?” Angela had to think for a moment, “I’m off shift next Thursday.. What about five o’clock?” She asks, and you nod happily. “Wonderful!” She chuckled. “I shall see you then... I think you should get going before Morrison starts complaining that I’m keeping you back unnecessarily... I do believe he wishes to see you.” She informed, the fondness starting to show through in her voice. You nod in gratitude. “Thanks, Angela... Could I call you Angie, now?” You asked, rather cheekily. Angela rolled her eyes a little bit at the question. “We’ll see. Now get going.” She hit your shoulder playfully, before moving away to fill in the paperwork about you being discharged. She gave you a final wave, and blew you a kiss as you walked out.

#mercy #mercy overwatch #mercy x reader #angela ziegler #angela ziegler x reader #overwatch #overwatch x reader

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angstysebfan · 3 years

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Okay I think I'm gonna hurt my own heart with this but hey, it's angst. Could you please write something where reader and Bucky are married, have a child or children and still work as Avengers. Maybe one day reader is sent to go on a mission and Bucky stays home on dad duty. Reader's mission goes badly and she doesn't make it home, leaving him all alone 😭.

(I may request an alternative ending to this because I'm a soft bean).

Oookay can I change up my second request that I sent, please (I've decided my heart can't handle the horrible ending I suggested 😂. Yes I'm a wuss). So mission still goes awry and they think reader is dead because they don't find her body. So Bucky is still told horrible news that she is dead. Maybe a month later he gets a call from a hospital that says they have her and have finally identified who she is and she's okay. (2/2)

Lol!! I understand not wanting the angsty ending. I might write angst, but I hate writing angsty endings... lmao! Hope you like this. WARNING: MENTIONS OF BLOOD AND INJURIES.

Be Careful

Bucky kissed you passionately, not wanting to let you go. You pull back and give him a smile, “I’ll be home before you know it. Take care of our little bean while his mommy kicks some ass,” you say as you walk backwards away.

“I will. Be careful. I love you, Doll,” Buck says with a smile.

You blow him a kiss before you climb the ramp to the quinjet before going on a solo mission. You turn back and look at your husband, “I love you more!” you shout before entering the quinjet.

Bucky watches as the quinjet lifts off and flies you away, until you are finally out of sight. He turns and goes back into the compound and into your shared apartment, where your 8 month old son is blissfully asleep in his crib. Bucky quickly checks on him before going back out into the common room, knowing FRIDAY will let him know if the baby wakes up.

It’s been several hours and there has been no word from you, and Bucky was starting to get nervous. You were supposed to check in an hour ago, but Steve told him to not panic. Bucky tried to distract himself with caring for your son. He fed him, played with him a little bit, gave him a bath and put him to bed. He hoped you would have been home before he went to bed, but there was still no word.

Bucky sat in bed, thinking about what could have happened. He tried to think about how something had gone wrong, and you had to find a safehouse, and it was taking a little longer. He knew something was wrong, but when Steve knocked on the door, and Bucky saw his face, he knew it was worse than he could imagine.

Wanda came to watch the baby, while Bucky went with Steve, Sam, and Nat to the location where they lost signal from you. When they landed outside of the abandoned HYDRA base, they search and eventually find your empty quinjet about a half mile away.

Bucky ran over to it, calling for you in desperation. It was dark, but with the lights on the quinjet, the team was horrified to not only not find you, but see a lot of blood around the inside quinjet. Bucky thought he was either going to throw up or pass out. Nat seeing his reaction, pulled Bucky out of the quinjet so he can breath some fresh air.

Sam looked at Steve sadly, “This is a lot of blood, Steve. If this is hers, there is no way Y/N is...” Sam couldn’t bare to finish his sentence. Steve took a sample with a piece equipment Tony and Bruce created, which showed that the blood did indeed belong to you. He sighs defeatedly and looks out of the quinjet where Nat was holding a sobbing Bucky.

He walks out and looks at Nat, “Take him back to the compound and have Tony and yourself come back when the sun is up. Sam and I are going to continue to search the area,” he says.

Bucky pulls away from Nat, “I’m not leaving. I am finding my wife,” he says.

“Buck, you have to go back to the compound and take care of your son. You aren’t emotionally able to handle this mission. If the roles were reversed you would say the same to me,” Steve said, putting a hand on Bucky’s shoulder.

Bucky choked on a sob, but nodded, knowing Steve was right. Nat pulled Bucky to the other quinjet and set off toward the compound. Bucky was silent the whole ride, praying to whatever god there was that you were still alive. He knew he was going to make whoever hurt you pay no matter what, but he needed you to be alive.

The next day Wanda stayed with Bucky to help with his son, as she knew Bucky was distracted waiting to hear back from the team. When he saw the quinjet land he ran out, hoping that they found you. Steve walked out and looked devastated and like he was crying. Bucky took a deep breath as Steve walked up to him, “Buck...”

Bucky nodded, knowing you were dead. “I’m sorry. We couldn’t even recover her body,” Steve said, fighting back tears.

Bucky took a deep breath, wiping the tears that threatened to fall. He looked behind Steve and saw the rest of the team crying, all feeling the devastation of losing their friend. Bucky took a deep breath as Wanda brought his son out to him, knowing Bucky needed him.

Bucky looked at his hansom son, who looks just like you, with Bucky’s eyes. How was ever going to be able to explain to him how he failed to keep his mother safe? How would he explain how amazing his mother was and how much she loved him, and Bucky let her go out alone and get herself killed?

He forced himself to swallow the sob that threatened to come out when looking at his son and grabbed him from Wanda and held him close. After a few moments and walked away from team, not able to handle seeing them distraught. He went to his apartment and sat on the couch with his son in his arms. He looked at the big smile on his sons face and let the sob out.

“I’m so sorry,” he cried.

After a funeral a few days later, Bucky was benched from missions, though he was pretty sure he was going to retire now anyway. He didn’t want to make his son an orphan, plus he was in no mood to go out and save the world. He tried to act normal for his son, but every night he cried himself to sleep while he held your pillow, which still smelled like you.

He constantly apologized to you for letting you get hurt and killed. He had made a vow to protect you and he failed. He would never forgive himself for that. He knew his son would never forgive him either once he was old enough to understand. The team tried to be there, especially Steve, but Bucky was pushing everyone away. They all understood, but was worried about him.

It’s been a month and Bucky was not doing well. Nat stepped in and started taking care of the baby. Bucky fell into a deeper depression then he thought possible, and finally asked for help to take care of his son. He felt he didn’t deserve to have his son. Steve had never been so worried for his friend and didn’t know what to do.

Tony and Sam took lead in looking for the people who did this, and went on a mission to another HYDRA base. Once they entered the facility they went to find files to see if they could get information, but what they found surprised them even more.

Bucky was lying in bed, looking at the ceiling. This was life for him recently, and he was ok with it, since he obviously deserved it. Your death, he concluded, was punishment for his transgressions as the Winter Soldier. He did start to take better care of his son, but still required a lot of help.

While lying there, Steve came in, not bothering to knock. He rushed over to Bucky. “Buck, there is news,” Steve said urgently.

Bucky let out a sigh, “I thought revenge was what I wanted, but I don’t have the energy to find them and kill them. It won’t bring her back,” Bucky said sadly.

“No, Buck... Tony and Sam... they... they found her,” Steve said.

Bucky sat up and looked at his friend, “You mean they found her body?” he asked, hoping that’s not what he meant.

Steve shook his head, “She is alive, Pal. She is down in med bay, and she is alive, awake, and asking for you.”

Bucky was never up and out of bed faster, running out of the room and toward the elevator to get down there. He had to see it for himself. Once he got down to med bay he ran down the hall to where Tony was standing.

“Woah Barnes, you have to stop and take a deep breath before you go in. She needs to remain calm, you got it?” Tony said quietly.

Bucky nodded and slowly walked in and saw you lying in the bed, bruised, bloody, but alive. He thought his heart was going to burst out of his chest. “Y/N?” he asked, still not believing his eyes.

You looked at him and immediately relaxed, “Bucky,” you said in a raspy voice.

Bucky walked over to your bed and grabbed your outstretched hand. “Baby? Is... is it really you?” he asked.

You let a watery laugh escape, “It’s me baby. I’m sorry I’m late,” you said.

You pull Bucky into a hug and you both cried into each others shoulder. Wanda brought your son into the room, and you both held him and each other tightly. Bucky swore nothing and no one would ever take you away from him again. You were home, safe, and alive. He was going to make sure you always were.

Oh i loved this one! Thank you for requesting it! Hope you liked it!

Permanent Taglist: @hailmary-yramliah @tuiccim @comedictragedy @cap-n-stuff @thefridgeismybestie @aleaisntcreative @lookiamtrying @pinknerdpanda @morganclaire4 @iamvalentinaconstanza @verygraphicink @im-squished @joannie95 @peace-love-hobbitness @connie326 @arundhati1609 @amandamdiehl @harrysthiccthighss @its-izzys @roserose26 @rebekahdawkins @elegantobservationstudentsblog @broco8 @bestofbucky @white-wolf1940 @loser-alert @jassy2101

#Bucky Barnes #james buchanan barnes #james bucky barnes #Bucky angst #bucky fanfic #bucky x reader #bucky x y/n #bucky x you #bucky barnes x reader

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