So it's the end of 2023. Wow. This was a big year for me-- I entered my senior year of university and started my student teaching internship, which were the biggest two things. I'm so excited to be a teacher proper when I graduate in the spring, and I'm finally getting to experience teaching high school next semester, which is what I'm thinking I'm going to try and teach when I get to that point. I also got to move into a dorm with my three good friends, and that's been a great experience. Shout-out to those guys.
Fandom-wise, it's also been great. Hilda s3 dropped and re-invigorated my love of the show, and I feel as though I've gotten to make even more friends in the fandom. Y'all are really cool <3
I also got into Star Wars properly, which was wild. Things I never expected to get into: that. But I don't regret it-- it's a hella fun time, and the subfandoms I've gotten into are a ton of fun.
My art has also improved by leaps and bounds, after being burned out for ten months-- backgrounds are way easier for me now, and my coloring has definitely improved. Hilda was really great for me in terms of helping me get better at art, which, I'm sure, it will continue to do lmao. Hilda Appreciation Week is definitely motivating me to finally get some polished art done, lol.
On a more personal note, this past year has also helped me realize some things about myself. I've known I'm nonbinary for a while, but not really anything more than that, aside from genderflux. Realized this year that I'm transmasc, which has been an experience. I'm not using any other pronouns other than they/them right now, and I'm still an asexual lesbian, but I'm also nonbinary and transmasc. That was a slow-but-big realization for me, and, if I'm being honest, it's really helped me be more comfortable with my feminine presentation. Being GNC transmasc is cool <3
Putting this all into words is really helping me see how much I've grown over the past year. Good-bye, 2023, and hello 2024!
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Joe isn't looking at them, Cleo realizes. He's not looking at them, and not paying attention, which is concerning, since they're talking about Halloween decorations, and that's one of Joe's favorite things, and also about the bloody aftermath of the social game they'd just played, and that's another one of Joe's favorite things. But no--he's standing just outside of the Clocktower Village, and he's nodding along in the right places, but he's not looking at them.
They frown and tries to figure out where he's looking. His hands, mostly.
They stop talking. They take a breath. "Joe?"
"Yes, Cleo?" Joe says.
"You aren't paying attention," they say.
"I would never not pay attention to your wonderful words," Joe says.
"What were we talking about?"
"Well, blood and mayhem, mostly."
"...that's on me. I made that too easy," Cleo says. "But, Joe, if something's wrong, you can say so."
Joe is quiet.
"Or you can, like, not say anything?" they say. "I won't make you. Just, you also don't have to pretend to pay attention to me."
"Right, my bad. I'll pretend to ignore you instead."
"That's the spirit."
"Did you know I noticed the moon get big on Halloween?"
Cleo doesn't know how to respond, so they don't. They don't mean to look away from Joe, because that's rude, when he's saying something so important, but they do, a little bit, glancing up for a moment at the moon. It's large and nearly full, but there's a sliver waning away. The full moon, if they remember right, was a few days ago. They don't know why they felt like they needed to check.
"I noticed the moon get big on Halloween," Joe says again. "I mean, I didn't really. I just thought it was cool we had such a big full moon for Halloween. It made everything so much spookier, you know? It was only a little bit bigger, then. I didn't realize until later it had been getting bigger for--at least a week? Probably at least two? It grew so slowly then."
"I didn't know that," Cleo says.
"Well, I didn't say anything," Joe says. "I probably should have said something. I don't know. It's just--it's been two years now? It's been two years, and no one talks about it. I mean, sometimes in December, I guess, and at the start of the season we talked about it a little bit, but no one--I have a place in my base I'm already keeping everything important, and you and Cub have museums, and I keep on thinking that the museums are good, because if we were all gone tomorrow, and someone had to come pull something out of the rubble--is it stupid? Did it happen? Cleo, sometimes I feel like I'm crazy. No one talks about it. Maybe we shouldn't talk about it? Maybe it didn't matter? We're all fine now, we're all here, it didn't happen again, it's been two years since I had to miss you. And I love Halloween, and I noticed the moon get big on Halloween then, but it probably won't again, I mean, it was a freak thing, and, I just--does it even--did it matter, was it really bad, was it--"
He stops because Cleo's grabbed his hands, gently. They lower themselves down so they are looking Joe directly in the eyes.
"It was real. It mattered. It was bad," Cleo says.
Joe swallows and stares them in the eyes.
"I will never do that again," Cleo says.
"I won't make you promise that," Joe says. "I don't want to make you promise that."
"Okay. But it was bad. It mattered. It was bad," Cleo says.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
They stare at each other a little longer, and then slowly, Joe removes one of his hands from hers and looks back up at the sky.
"It's a waning gibbous," he says.
"That's what that's called?" Cleo says.
"Yeah," Joe says.
"Huh," Cleo says. "Sort of a boring name for a moon phase to have killed each other under, really."
Joe laughs. "You've got a point there. Not the most dramatic of moons, the waning gibbous."
"No, I can say that's not the most dramatic of moons at all," Cleo agrees, and then they are both silent for some time as they continue walking back towards Hermitcraft proper.
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Because the “shrodinger’s queerbait” nonsense will never go away, indulge me an analogy (and a long post).
wlw ships are the “made from scratch” cake in a world where we only ever expect cake mix from the box.
Say you have a show where, in the first interaction between a male and female character, there is a red box. It could be a Betty Crocker box of cake mix. Because all it takes is just one smile — one wink — one raised eyebrow— and the fans don’t question it. We’re clearly making a cake here. The box is red.
Meanwhile, you have two female characters building their own relationship that have elements that could build to romance. There are eggs in the fridge. A few more episodes, there’s flour in the pantry. Sugar. Baking powder. Queer fans start whispering…we could be making a cake here. Other fans scoff “you will read into anything. They’re just eggs! Everyone has eggs in their fridge!” Maybe so, maybe not. They are written off as discrete ingredients, nothing to see here.
That red box is still sitting in the pantry. Obviously we’re going with that one, and it’s definitely cake mix. That guy and girl stood next to each other again.
The wlw relationship is now full-on batter. It was a cake recipe all along, but it’s not baked yet. The crowd that wrote off every ingredient is now saying the writers are just going to “squander” that box that could be ready-made cake mix or that they’re being “forced” to bake a cake with the very ingredients the writers deliberately bought and put in their pantry.
Now it’s in the oven, the cake is baking. That crowd will still insist it’s forced, or maybe its actually something else, or it’s rushed, or it’s pandering. Whether the writers painstakingly built a pantry to make the cake they truly wanted or they were cultivating good ingredients and realized they had the fixings for a more decadent cake and went there, it doesn’t matter. It’s still a recipe. One that fans who always have to piece together ingredients had hoped for or saw from the get-go, despite being scoffed at and disparaged. Just because that crowd didn’t see (or refused to see) those ingredients as part of a whole, doesn’t make it any less of a recipe.
And wlw fans shouldn’t have to keep writing essays to demonstrate that the wlw “cake” has all the ingredients every cake mix does, or keep pointing out that fans were ready to believe a cake was being baked when they saw a nondescript box, but that they’ll do anything to discredit or doubt the cake from scratch that’s now cooling off on the counter.
It is partly a function of heteronormativity from the audience in immediately seeing romance in any whisper of interaction between m/f characters and passing off all charged interactions between female characters are sisterly or platonic. And it also comes from writers, who are either being cautious so as not to spook corporate overlords or audiences, or who are preserving plausible deniability.
To take the analogy further, box cake mix is fine! It works! It is, practically speaking, what a lot of folks know by default. I thought I was a Duncan Hines girl once myself. Vanilla cake mix has the ingredients measured out, it’s a safe bet, it tastes like cake.
But it doesn’t mean every red box is cake mix. And it doesn’t make the cake that had to be pieced together from scratch due to censorship, caution, time, narrative build-up, what-have-you, any less of a cake.
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Bring Me Home Arc 2 Part 20: FINAL
So guess what I realized this morning. Today, November 13, 2023 is the one year anniversary of me posting my first DPxDC fic to tumblr. It was the original fill for this very fic. (Which you can find here.)
So I decided I just had to finish this arc and get it posted. This year has been amazing and so much fun. I've become a much better writer and joined a community that has brought me so much joy. I'm glad to be here and I'm glad so many of you like to read what I'm sharing.
I noticed I got a few new readers over the past week or so, so welcome to all of you! Hope you enjoy this early update!
In personal news, my nephew was born and he's adorable and I'll be meeting him tomorrow! (As soon as I'm done posting this, I'm off to make food for his mom.)
Story Summary: Tim and Danny are both neglected by parents who care more about their work than their families. They deal with this by spending too much time online and find each other playing MMORPGs. They keep up their friendship as Tim becomes Robin and Danny becomes Phantom and don't bother keeping secrets from each other.
Arc 1
Arc 2: Part 1, Previous
Word Count: 1.2k
-----
In the end, it ended up taking several hours for Danny, Sam, and Tucker to escape their families and converge on the park. In that time, Tim had called Bruce to let him know he’d be back in Gotham by tomorrow and finished most of his homework.
While he worked, Wulf and Bart were having an animated conversation in Esperanto.
Tim was pretty sure Wulf would be bringing Bart to the Ghost Zone for a tour sometime and started making plans to learn Esperanto himself and bribe Bart to get in on them.
Cassie was helping Conner sort through some of the music Sam had given him. Tim was jealous as he solved more banal trig questions. Why did school have to be so boring? He tapped his pencil on the paper in time to the beat of whatever music Conner had playing.
Tucker was the first to arrive. “Danny and Sam not here yet?” he asked as he plopped down next to Bart and Wulf.
“Nope. Haven’t heard from them, either,” said Tim. He opened his phone notifications again just to be sure, but there was nothing new.
Tucker shrugged and pulled out a stick of jerkey to munch on. “Not surprising. The Fentons will be all overprotective after the mayor was kidnapped by a ghost on live TV. And Sam’s parents are just as bad. Only they smother rather than check the weaponry.” He turned to greet Wulf in Esperanto.
An email came through on Tim’s phone and he groaned. “Our evening interview was canceled. No one wants to hear us try to defend Phantom anymore.”
Cassie cursed. “Course not. Bet the paper won’t publish our editorials either.”
Conner looked over, confused. “Won’t they? Clark works for the Daily Planet. They publish stuff like that all the time.”
Tim didn’t look up from his math as he answered, “That’s the difference between a big, Pulitzer winning publication and a small-town op-ed.”
Tucker sighed. “Well maybe someone will remember your interviews from this morning in a positive light.”
Bart rolled his eyes. “Come on, we can’t change it. So let’s move forward. Next step, make friends with more ghosts! Wulf says there’s a bunch of cool people in the Realms.”
“Realms?” asked Tim.
“It’s what he says the Ghost Zone is actually called. The Infinite Realms.”
“Huh. I’ll have to check JL databases, see if they have any information on them.”
Tucker asked something in Esperanto and Bart burst out laughing as Wulf looked on in confusion.
With Bart’s help, though, he rephrased until Wulf was able to reply. And then the three kept to Esperanto. Tim really had to find time to learn it.
Sam was the next to arrive. She grinned and sat down next to Conner. “How you liking the music?”
Conner grinned and showed her the sheets where he ranked the bands so far based on which songs he’d listened to. She then took over the speakers and searched for specific tracks to try and change his mind about some of the bands he liked the least.
Tim let his eyes close as his friends’ voices washed over him.
After some indeterminate time where he dozed between sleeping and awareness, a foot nudged his hip. Tim grumbled out what was supposed to be a, “What?” but was too mumbled to really be understood.
“Come on, Secrets. You can do better than that.”
Tim cracked an eye open to see Danny grinning down at him. He pushed himself up slightly and blinked heavily in the sunlight.
“Finally got away from your parents?” asked Tim.
Danny collapsed on the ground next to him. “Ugh, don’t remind me. They’re freaking out over everything that’s happened the last few days. Jazz and I are basically going to be on lock down until they feel confident the ghosts are gone.”
“Did you have to sneak out to get here?” asked Cassie.
Danny shook his head. “No, I told them I was going to find you guys to make sure you were all safe. You’re welcome to come back to ours tonight, by the way. Mom and Dad basically insisted on it.”
“What do you guys think?” asked Tim. “Spend one more night here at Danny’s and head out in the morning?”
Cassie sighed. “My mom’s already freaking out that I’ve been gone longer than planned. I should get back tonight.”
“I’ll stay,” offered Conner. “I’m your ride home, anyway.”
“Why don’t you come to my place, Conner,” offered Sam. “Your nails need a fresh coat after fighting today. And I need teach you about the different brands of makeup and what to look for in terms of cost, quality, and ethicality. Plus I can get you more music.”
Tim laughed when Conner looked to him. “Go for it. Have fun.”
Conner grinned. “Then yeah, let’s do it!”
Bart shrugged. “Wulf is going to go back to the Realms soon. I’ll head out after. Wally and Linda want me over for a family dinner tonight.”
“Well, looks like that’s it, then,” sighed Danny. “Been fun having other heroes around.”
Tim nudged his shoulder. “Join the Young Justice. You could join us and we'd help out whenever you wanted. Get you around people who actually appreciate what you do for them.”
But Danny was already shaking his head. “I have to stay here. And now Amity trusts heroes even less. I want to improve that, not make it worse.”
“Even if you don’t join,” declared Conner. “You’re not getting rid of us now.”
Bart nodded his agreement. “Yep. We’re gonna be stopping by all the time. You’re in the group chat.”
“Exactly,” agreed Tim. “And we’ll figure out ways to help you. Starting with how to minimize property damage. That seems to be the big thing people focus on. You can make shields, right? How big can you make them and how much power do they take?”
Danny smiled wryly. “Can’t say I’ve really tested it.”
Tim laughed. “Well, I know one thing we’re doing tonight. We’re going to go back to Nasty Burger—” Tim looked around at the whole group “—all of us. Then Cassie and Bart are going to go home. Danny and I, at least, are going to take a nap. Then we’re gonna test the current limits to Danny’s powers.”
Danny bumped their shoulders together. “You know, this is just like gaming with you all those years.”
“Yeah, well, it’s best to be thorough.”
“We’ve measured, like, his top speed and stuff,” said Tucker, pulling out a PDA. “Want to see what we’ve got so far?”
“Absolutely.” Tim took the device and looked through it. “You’ve a decent amount of information here. Maybe instead of taking a nap, I’ll help you organize it and come up with a testing plan.”
Conner flew over to him and pulled the PDA out of his hand. “Not after pulling an all-nighter you won’t. We’re going to get some food, then the two of you are going to sleep for at least four hours.”
“I’ll set Jazz on you, too,” threatened Sam. “Don’t think I won’t.”
Tim pouted as the device was given back to Tucker. And grumbled more when Conner picked him up and threw him over his shoulder.
“Come on, food time.”
“I am going to put kryptonite in your phone,” threatened Tim.
“Bingo!” shouted Cassie.
Danny laughed as he stood. “Does this mean I can join the next round?”
Tim scowled. “Traitors, all of you.”
-----
Next
And that's the end of this Arc! Arc 3 will pick up where the original fill did. (Only this time, Tim won't be the only DC character there to help Danny.)
I'd say something like I can't believe it's only been a year, but so much has happened to me in the last twelve months that it feels like a lifetime ago, to be honest. But it's been a good year and I'm glad this community has been part of it.
Please follow the subscription post if you want updates for when I start transferring this arc to AO3 or begin posting Arc 3.
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