#motherissues

[abudhabby29-blog]

Only Child

Nobody talks about the only child.

The child that is assumed to be spoiled

The child is assumed to be loved by their parents.

Yes, there is no lie that sometimes you are spoiled and you are loved.

Yet you are carrying the weight of an eldest and youngest child.

That you must not speak against them so the house you live in could be liveable and bearable

That you are the punching bag for their anger and stress that they cannot communicate with others or each other.

That you carry the trauma that they have passed on to you from their childhood.

You try to be strong but sometimes you just want to curl up and let someone carry the weight

#parental issues #onlychild #father issues #motherissues

[zeldasnotes]

YOUR LILITH PLACEMENT: UNEVOLVED & EVOLVED

These are my personal observations and not facts. If you are someone whos sensitive to reading negative observations about your placement then dont read this post or only read the evolved part.

LILITH IN THE 1ST HOUSE

evolved: Strong leadership abilities, independent, sexy, brave, confident, attracts attention easily, ambitious and driven, using your drive and energy for good purposes, indpiring, refusing to back down, standing up for the underdogs, goes against societal expectations.

unevolved: No boundaries when it comes to your body, treating your body like an object, hiding behind a bitchy phacade, feeling a strong need to change your looks, overdoing the ”the bad guy” act, aggressive, too much need for excitement, seeking conflict, too attention seeking, shocking others for reactions and attention, rude.

LILITH IN THE 2ND HOUSE

evolved: Good at making money, not letting people use you, able to recognize those who are only after your for your looks or money, saving & investing, using your sensual energy for good, artistic, good at cooking, good at pleasing all senses, seductive, understanding the power of your smell, touch and how you look.

unevolved: Low self worth, settling for less than what you deserve, letting people use you to feel a sense of worth, no self respect, shopping addiction, materialistic, financial self destruction, trying to heal emotional issues with material stuff, body image issues, greedy, never satisfied, settling for less.

LILITH IN THE 3RD HOUSE

evolved: Extremely intelligent, cunning, always an ace up your sleeve, able to get yourself out of any situation, the perfect socialite, great storyteller, using your communication skills for good, picking up on hidden undercurrents, able to seduce and convince others easily, musical talent, writing talent.

unevolved: Lying, strong envy towards a sibling, mindfog, hard time controlling your tongue, gossiping, tongue turning into a knife when you feel insecure, calling out peoples insecurities, underestimating other peoples intelligence, unnecessary mean comments.

LILITH IN THE 4TH HOUSE

evolved: Nurturing, understanding of other peoples needs, good mothers if you choose to have children yourself, a soft aura that others are super drawn too, excellent sense of hospitality, generous, sensing other peoples psychological state easily, breaking the generational curse if you have your own children.

unevolved: Moody, bad relationship with women, projecting your motherissues onto other women, homewrecking, issues with femininity, treating other women like your mom treated you, fixated with traditions, manipulating, cold when in a bad mood,

LILITH IN THE 5TH HOUSE

evolved: Healing your inner child, marching to the beat of your own drum, knows how to make others feel special, great party planner, decides to do different for your own children, praising yourself instead on looking for praise and admiration from others, making your taboo taste into art, changing the industry.

unevolved: Using arrogance to make up for feeling small, no sense of reality, boasting, projecting onto your own child, refusing to co parent, going out of your way to get attention, deadly afraid of rejection, gambling, fixation with dark art, baby trapping, gambling, repeating childhood patterns with your own children.

LILITH IN THE 6TH HOUSE

evolved: Interested in health, healthy relationship to health and your body, learning that its ok to be human and not a perfect robot, very skilled at what you do, being of service to others because thats what you live but not to the point of forgetting yourself, taking care of yourself, taking small steps instead of expecting instant perfection.

unevolved: Neglecting your health or obsessive about health,living in filth, unable to follow a routine, not visiting the doctor for years, refusing to ask for help, critical, overworking yourself, not feeling satisfied until its perfection, overdoing your work, envious of those in the same business as you, envious of other peoples work, weird relationship to pets.

LILITH IN THE 7TH HOUSE

evolved: Charming and social, excellent social skills, seeing your own faults in your relationship, learning that sometimes confrontation is needed, compassionate, supportive instead of competetive towards others of your gender, refusing to fight or manipulate someone into loving you, seeing your own beauty instead of focusing on others, setting boundaries.

unevolved: Passive aggressive, inappropriate relationships, attracted to 3rd party situationships, attracted to the bad guys, homewrecker, using politeness as a weapon, turning people against eachother, naive, thinking everyone wants your partner, losing yourself for the sake of pleasing others, manipulating instead of confronting, too nice for your own good, people pleasing.

LILITH IN THE 8TH HOUSE

evolved: Using your power for good, magnetic, born psychologist, spiritual, strong but healthy interest in dark subjects, self aware, exploring your sexuality in healthy ways, good at uncovering the truth, letting go of the control issues, learning that your body belongs to you.

unevolved: Obsessed with power, abusing your power, lack of sexual boundaries, sex addiction, having to rely on others for money,control issues, struggling with obsession, vengeful, risky sex or sex with risky people, unhealthy interest in dark subjects, unhealthy fixation with sex.

LILITH IN THE 9TH HOUSE

evolved: Intelligent, humanitarian, fast learner, adventurous, able to find hope in any situation, exploring other belief systems instead of judging, giving back to your community, rebelling against cultural expectations, modern, not afraid to break societal rules, refusing to be forced or silenced into conforming.

unevolved: Extremist, hypocrite, cultural appropriation, too easily manipulated when it comes to opinions, fixation and envy towards another culture, using religion as a mask, hiding your faults under a ”churchmom” image, fanatic, hard time understanding people who are different, lying about where you are from, extremely judgmental.

LILITH IN THE 10TH HOUSE

evoled: Ambitious, seeing worth in yourself no matter what others think of you, refusing to bow down to ”high society”, refusing to be labeled, a force to be reckoned with, refusing to beg your way into rooms you are not welcomed in and instead kicking the door open, letting go of the need to be seen with the right people, letting go of trying to be accepted by a toxic father figure.

unevolved: Workaholism, working as a way of avoiding pain, social climbing, using others for status, obsessed with status and image, seeing ”important” people as better, thinking that social standing is everything, judging people based on social standing, seeking fame or clout to feel protected, hiding behind a ”name”.

LILITH IN THE 11TH HOUSE

evolved: Humanitarian, understanding of people from all walks of life, thinking for yourself instead of being influenced, not afraid to befriend the outcasts, seeing more than labels, rebellious, fighting for justice, standing up against the ”in crowd”.

unevolved: Envious of friends, befriending or staying friends with someone to keep an eye on theme, fake, detached, mistrusting everyone because of early experiences with friends, betraying before you get betrayed, unable to see whos your friend and whos your enemy, befriending bad people bc you think they will be different to you.

LILITH IN THE 12TH HOUSE

evolved: Psychic, accepting your shadow side, listening to your intuition, saintlike, working on your triggers, dealing with issues instead of escaping, extremely compassionate, using your psychic abilities for good, helpful but without sacrificing yourself completely, very empathic, saviour.

unevolved: Unable to be alone, addictions, hard time facing reality, making up a fantasy image of things in your head to avoid dealing with reality, self sacrifice, thinking you are the victim in every situation, constantly, finding ways to escape your feelings, refusing to deal with your triggers, focusing on other peoples problems to avoid your own, naive.

©️ 2024 Zeldas Notes All Rights Reserved

#astro notes #astrology #astro observations #astronotes #lilith #lilith 1st house #lilith aspects #lilith 8th house #Lilith in the houses

[abbyslev]

Your so real I can’t when older women start getting all sweet and motherly…YOUR GONNA END ME. #motherissues

no because the way when any older woman talks to me and we form some sort of bond i immediately get attached and i cant let them go it’s so bad like i just want someone who has a mothers love that will accept me for who i am😭😭😭

#mommy issues #this is embarrassing #I JUST WANT A LOVING MOM OK

[sparkles-and-trash]

When your namesake’s motherissues mirrors your own 😙✌🏼💅🏼✨

#my mom even named me after her because her names sounds like mortica lil #lol #wednesday #wednesday netflix #wednesday addams #mortica addams #the addams family #personal #irl tag

[adhd-tomboy]

Leo’s First Show Up..

Ft: Leona, My Mom, Younger Me

#Leona #DID #PastSelf #MotherIssues #GachaClub

[littlehomelesspeopleihavenoideay]

Yo ya quisiera a mi baby pero right back and here with my arms my little homeless arms because I literally have no idea where she is and if she's free or if she's with hambre or with whatever she is going on with and everytime I'm asking she's literally just like every other hombre...what about me?joking? What about you? You crazy? Go ask Patrick Kane? #motherissues #patrickkane #makethispostfamousforme #psdtmymothersnameisCarmenConstantinaMizis and she's not supposed to be super good with dogs because then her husband doesn't make her Happy

#littlehomelessdoggymamaIHaveNoideaY

[madihasheikh]

"What is a home if not the first place you learn to run from"

~Courtney Love Prays to Oregon, Clementine von Radics

#escape #escapism #dark academia #aesthetic #clementine #clementine von radics #courtneylovepraystooregon #fatherissues #motherissues #parentalissues #dark aesthetic #etheral aesthetic #etheral #old paintings #runningfromourdemons

[themiddlelayer]

The People I Came From

I was ‘raised’ by people with one foot in the grave and one on a banana peel.

I vividly remember hearing over and over how ‘Uncle Sam’ was going to pay for grandpa’s funeral because he helped build the pipeline in Alaska.

The irony? There have never been any funerals.

Not for my grandfather whose Alzheimer’s had him wandering off and having long conversations with dead relatives before lung cancer waltzed in and took him out.

Not for my grandma who grew up a ‘rich Oakie because they had 2 mattresses,’ picked cotton in the fields, turning her skin into papery wrinkles in her late forties. The family ‘upgraded’ from the silver Twinkie by the river into the double-wide in a park in town because of 2 of my grandma’s car accidents. A police officer hit her and driving away from the courthouse, another one rear-ended her.

I couldn’t make this shit up if I tried.

Not for my father who spent most of my life drunk or high, hiding from me- the reminder of my mother that he couldn’t face. The woman who broke his heart that he never got over.

My father got custody of me and my younger brother in the divorce, so that’s where I was raised- in a house with my brother and father with his parents as the backup babysitters for the times we couldn’t be home alone.

I was raised in a house where, by the time I hit puberty, I knew I didn’t belong. I wasn’t one of them. I was like my mother. “A champagne appetite on a beer budget, riding my high horse” all over the little 2-bedroom condo where we lived. My father’s bedroom was the garage.

When finally left and I moved in with my mother at 16, it became apparent quickly that our similarities were so much that she saw me not as a child that needed to be parented, but as an equal. An adult.

Someone that she didn’t need to protect from anything- not her lecherous husband who kissed his grown daughters on the mouth and talked about our breasts at the dinner table. Not the patients at the rehab center they ran where I was a staff member- the grown men whose beds I eagerly hopped in and out of under their roof.

Not her best friend who was threatening to kick my ass. She was the girlfriend of the staff member with who I was involved for several months. Her 31-year old boyfriend was 3 days out of San Quentin when we met. It took less than 2 weeks before we were exchanging passing gropes in dark hallways and love letters, carelessly discarded where my mother found one.

Funny story- I’m Facebook friends with Mr. SQ and he’s popped up over the years. The last time we talked, I mentioned how young I was when we were together.

He remembered that I was young- too young to be sitting in a bar in the Haight with him, too young to be walking down Ashbury looking to score meth, too young to be talking about running away to Europe together. Too young to be the one comforting him in secret when his girlfriend miscarried their son.

He didn’t realize I was that young. He was shocked when I told him that I was only 16 when we were having those adventures together. Then he asked how I knew what I was doing. Then he apologized. Then I gave him the link to Twitter for my alter ego- a creator of BDSM leaning adult content.

For all our similarities, I had to unfriend and block my mother earlier this year. Between her dismissive anti-feminist comments during all of the ‘me too’ posts to her anti-vax stance during the pandemic and all the insanity in between, I just couldn’t do it anymore.

When I tried to talk to her about I’d spent my entire childhood being told how ‘smart’ and ‘mature’ I was for my age rather than being parented, she replied that I was always the one teaching her things.

More proof in her mind that when, at 3 years old I looked up at her, hands on my little hips, and scolded, “When I was your mommy that’s not how we did it!” it was the truth. She managed to make that my reality, despite not being my custodial parent.

My mother was just released from the hospital where she was battling COVID.

She had been there a few days before my brother finally tracked her down. She was so disoriented that the nurse asked him to verify that she has 2 children and where she lived.

I had a video chat with last week her where she paused between each word to take jagged breaths as she described her lunch- seemingly the most amazing cheeseburger she’d ever had. She’d been calling friends to tell them it had been “swell” and that she didn’t think she was going to make it.

Now, she’s in a rehab facility somewhere near my brother in Utah. She didn’t tell him she was getting out of the hospital or where she went.

He still seems to think that the stories about ICUs running out of beds are just media propaganda. He also had COVID last month, right after his wife had surgery. He went to work as a Walmart manager for a full week, thinking he had a cold before he lost his sense of smell.

These are the people I came from.

One foot in the grave, one foot on a banana peel. And no matter how hard I fight it, I feel myself slipping.

Work, couch, bed, repeat- the hamster wheel life of the pandemic.

#covidiots #MotherIssues #childhood memories

[at-hailey]

I love my mother I do but what right does she have to say she raised me when my first memory of her is her telling my I can't see her that weekend. How can she say she raised me when she wasn't the one to kiss my bruises when I was hurt. How can she say I was a difficult toddler when she only every saw one tantrum out of my many tantrums. How can she say she loves me so much yet chooses not to see me? She fucked up when I was young for years she could have fixed it, now that I've finaly stopped giving a shit she tries to fix it. How is that fair? How can I look at her without remembering my step father yelling at 5 year old me for making my mom feel bad when all I did was cry because I missed my mommy? How can I look at her when I still remember hyperventilating in the back seat as both of them yelling at me for simply telling my mom a girl thing that I didnt want my step father to know about? How can i look at her without remembering 4 year old me calling the person who feed me, changed me, sung me to sleep, and cared for me mom and her yelling at me for it till my lungs couldn't suck in any air? Why do I still love her? How is this fair?

#rants #mommyissues #motherissues #help plz

[orionletters]

The ones who broke you first are always in your family

The Flower Shit

#toxic #toxic family #daddy issues #motherissues #broken #sad poem #sadgirl #sad quotes #happy #real life #poetry #poesie #poesia

[ceritanovieocktavia]

Apakah Kamu Punya Luka Pengasuhan Karena Ibu?

Hubungan antara anak dan ibu boleh jadi merupakan hubungan yang paling unik diantara hubungan-hubungan lain yang ada di dunia. Ibu, sebagai orang yang melahirkan kita ke dunia adalah orang yang secara mendalam kita sayangi. Namun demikian, luka paling dalam juga sangat mungkin terjadi karena kita merasa terluka oleh beliau atau juga sebaliknya.

Idealnya, anak memiliki hubungan yang baik dengan ibu sehingga ibu menjadi satu-satunya orang terpenting di dunia, yang cintanya dicari, yang lukanya dihindari, dan yang kebahagiaannya menjadi semangat kita dalam menjalani hari-hari.

Tapi, kenyataan yang ada tidak selalu berbicara demikian. Ada anak-anak yang memiliki hubungan yang cukup rumit dan tidak ideal dengan ibunya. Alih-alih mencintainya sepenuh jiwa, ia bahkan merasa tidak memiliki alasan untuk mencintai dan membanggakan ibunya. Ada pula yang kebingungan bagaimana caranya untuk dapat menjalin hubungan yang baik, lekat, dan dekat dengan ibu. Tidak hanya itu, ada juga yang masih menyimpan dendam atau kebencian kepada ibu atas luka-luka pengasuhan yang pernah terjadi. Kitakah itu? Bagaimana bisa kita berdamai dan menyelesaikan itu semua.

Yuk, diskusi di kelas Heal Yourself periode Desember ini dengan tema Heal Your Mother Issues bersama @gorgeouspipi pada tanggal 13 Desember 2019 nanti. Untuk pendaftaran, silakan melalui http://bit.ly/healyourmotherissue

#healyourself #healyourselfclass #motherissues

[clarityren]

my mum..

Whenever I have mentioned I am affected by childhood, upbringing, bullying ect always blames drugs on my mental health but knows I didn't start taking it till 18 and that wasn't hardcore just smoking weed, I tried a few other things once or twice didn't like them

I continued to smoke weed for several years, my form of escape, I enjoyed it I wasn't hurting anyone then my mum said i was out of control and that it was the drugs I know why she does is it.

She can't accept or tell herself actually my daughter is the way she is because of several things her upbringing, bullying, being around alcoholics since a baby, genetics family history of mental health and suicide

It's easy to blame it on the one thing drugs, she made me out to be crazy for smoking weed when my brother started doing it and selling she was mad but mad at me that was my fault

#toxic parent #narcicist mother #narcicist healing #narcicist #narcism #mentally ill #mental illness #mental disorder #mental health #motherissues #mentally ill mother #abusive mother #abusive mothers

[lurid-madness]

I feel like I have nowhere else to vent and I know nobody I know personally follows me on here so here I go, let me vent

My mom has never really shown me much affection or told me she loved me very much and for a while that never really bothered me because I didn’t know any different. She’s also never uplifting, or encouraging, we don’t share our feelings and I so desperately want to be able to do that. She’s always putting me down and criticizing every little thing I do and I don’k know I just can’t take it’s anymore. I’ve been crying in my room trying to get my final done that’s due tomorrowa I’m in so much emotional pain. My parents went away for the weekend to go camping and i stayed home. I’ve been wanting to dye my hair for a while now but she’s never let me . I’m 18 and I told her I wanted to dye my hair and she was so mad and told me how bad it would look and how bleaching and dyeing my hair at home would turn out horrible and that’s just a mom thing to say but my dad told her she should just let me do it. So they left and I did it. It’s hot pink a little purple and I love it. Over the weekend walking around town with my friend and going to work I felt so pretty and amazing in my new hair . So the day my mom was coming home I texted her like hey I did dye my hair I just wanted to prepare you and she asked for a picture to “prepare herself some more” and I sent it and she hated it . And that brought my mood down quite a bit and I laid in my room feeling drained until she came home when I bolted up excited to see her again and happy she was home and also excited to show her my hair in person hoping she would see what everyone else saw and loved. (I’ve been getting compliments left and right all weekend) but she looked at me and said she hated it she said I looked like a drug addict and I looked ugly . I tried to joke and brush it off in the moment but that hurt so bad. I felt so good before. And hearing that from your mom hurts so bad . She kept looking at me with this face that showed how genuinely she disliked It it wasn’t just because she was upset if dyed it I could tell she meant every word she said. So I was sad and my dad came home a little while after her in his own car and he didn’t like it much either but he’s always been warmer with me so he hugged my the second he saw me and told me I looked Chinese (?) which makes no sense I’m Mexican af and I only dyed my hair hot pink ? Idk but I could tell he wasn’t too upset it’s my hair he said . I went to my room feeling really sad and emotional , this whole situation just broke me, it was like the straw that broke the camels back almost I tried to not cry so she but I ended up tearing up . I posted in Instagram how I my parents hated it and i was sad and I received so many kind messages telling me how much they loved my hair and how it looked so good on me to not let my moms worked get to me. But it’s my mom you know? Isn’t your mom supposed to be uplifting and always tell you you’re beautiful no matter what? It hurt . But recently I’ve just been so down about how she treats me, she’s so negative a rude . She’s always said I don’t deserve respect because I’m her daughter and she’s my mom, she’s so overprotective but it just feels like she doesn’t trust me with anything . She’s always calling out every single mistake I make and getting so mad Over the smallest things and putting me down about them. But she never says anything if I do something good, or says she’s proud of me or anything positive . She scares me . She’s always scared me. I don’t know what to do, should I talk to her ? I really want to but I’m so scared of her and I feel like she won’t understand and just get mad at me. I don’t think I’ll be able to take it if she disregards my emotions. ADVICE IS WELCOME if you actually read this please help me. I feel like I just need somebody to understand me and I need comfort. I’ve never gotten it from anybody else and I really need some love right now . Thank you.

#helpme #motherproblems #motherissues #ineedadvise #sad #feelingdown #emotional #confession #advise #whatshoudido #venting #vent #angry #parents #ineededtovent #ineedlove #loveneeded #love #comfort

[the-alien-enby]

My mom makes no sense-

All I did was say that I thought something said marvel instead of margarita and she starts going ape-shit about how I always disrespect her. Then when I answer another one of her questions, actually going into why the hell I always talk about things she doesn’t care about, she twists my words from “everyone ignores me” to “you always ignore me”.

Does anyone else have this problem with their parent? I need to know if I’m alone here or not

#mom issues #motherissues #i need help with this #why do i live with the crazier part of my family

[moeder-aarde]

Y’all always be talking about how you have to love yo mom cuz she always there for you.

Lemme tell ya

I’ve been there for my mom everytime she felt sad, depressed or heartbroken.

Every time a new boyfriend broke up with her i was there to take care of her.

I put my needs aside to help her.

I put my emotions aside so i could help her.

I did everything for her no matter how much it hurted me, i kept loving her even after she told us how worthless we where.

When she neglectes us, when she ignored us.

Every fucking time.

But when i was sitting on the cough, crying, feeling so lonely and depressed, wanting to die.

She came sitting next to me and asked.

If i wanted to move aside so her FUCKING BOYFRIEND COULD SIT NEXT TO HER!!!

I’ve been there for her, but not once she was there for me when i needed it.

And now when her 700000th boyfriend broke up with her, and she’s crying and depressed.

Im there for her again.

Becouse i know what its like to be ignored when you need love.

#motherissues

[findinghappinessitml]

Most days I wonder why I’m not in a mental institute

You know, the kind where they pump you full of drugs and you live a haze while you wonder from art therapy to group therapy and you lose track of days and time and your mother’s real name and there was ever a world before white sheets that smell too much like bleach that is still trying to get the smell of vomit out even once the sheets have dried and they’re hospital corner tucked onto your twin bed.

Yeah, most days I feel amazed that I was able to dress myself. Much less get myself to work and do that work sufficiently enough to where I get paid to keep doing it and then maintain a relationship with a partner and friendships. I have no idea how I have ever paid a single bill. The thought of putting in my banking information into a direct deposit form makes me want to hide behind a big piece of furniture and cry until I cannot breathe, but silently as to not disturb anyone.

most days I can't stop thinking about it. i'm obsessed with my own past the way my cat is obsessed with chasing me into the bathroom in case I turn on the faucet and she can steal some precious drops of water. (I promise I keep fresh water for my cat. an electronic fountain, no less) she likes to act like she has to hunt down any possible source of fresh water like she's never even seen the stuff. but that's how I've been with my memories. So, I can't really talk. I provide myself with everything I need to distract myself from my past. entertainment, food, shelter, self-help books, therapy, all the comforts I can afford, loved ones that care for me. but it matters naught.

I chase after my demons in hopes of catching up to them and demanding answers. shaking them out with any strength I might yet have in me. 

There's nothing to find. there's nothing to shake out, of anyone. there is no explanation that will satisfy the "why"

no real satiating response to "why does my mother choose him over me"

or "why can't I let go of the need to be loved by my mother"

there is never going to be any relief. there will be no quenching of this thirst. I'm just trying to learn to deal with a parched throat, the screaming only makes it worse

#ptsd #depression #anxiety #healing #trauma #surviving #motherissues #letting go #poems about trauma #is this really a poem #no #but who's going to tell me I'm wrong. no one. I dare you #spanish mothers #are interesting creatures to be treasured but observed with caution