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virgoilluminati · 1 month

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World Class

Chapter 7

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A/N; hello guys, so yeah - i went M I A again. Managed to do a whole university semester and didn't really end up writing any more of this. I'm sorry. Again this had been in the Archive for a while so I want to post it. The series i think is coming to the end, one more to go after this!

y/nmorrison

liked by ellatoone, alessiarusso and 200,000 others.

y/nmorrison celebration practice for the final 💪

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ellatoone the only moment where you weren't holding me up😂

alessiarusso something tells me these will not be our celebrations, my neck has hurt eversince 😅

judebellingham a celebration idea.. huh? this seems like a hard launch opportunity...

y/nmorrison @judebellingham i'm not sure you can hard launch once you've already made it official, my love ❣️

In the days leading up to the final, you couldn't help but feel yourself distancing further and further away from Leah. Despite the win against Australia, and spain around the corner, you found everytime you'd attempt to talk to Leah, either she''d be pulled back by Sarina, or you'd be on the phone to Jude or playing third wheel with Keira and Lucy.

At the dinner before the match, the tension between both of you was at an evident all time high. You could see a spare seat next to Leah, as she placed herself next to Rachel and Milly. As soon as you grabbed your dinner from the buffet, you made your way over to them, however before you could put your dinner down, Leah placed a water bottle over the seat, suggesting one of the coaches was sat there.

You felt suddenly uncomfortable, and also violated - as if you were in high school all over again being picked on by a bully. What made it worse was the fact that Leah was your best friend, and you knew deep down that it was your fault.

In all honesty, since the match against Australia and the massive news that Lucy had told Leah, you hadn't been in the mindset to truly think about the future of your career, whether that be at Arsenal or FC Barcelona or even just Real Madrid. Your heart strings were being pulled apart by the three things which you cared the most about; your boyfriend, your best friend and your career. It also became apparent that no matter what you decided to do someone was going to get hurt. Instead your mind had been focused entirely on this last match, much like everyone else. The training session had intensified to levels that none of you had expected, hours long past normal sociable times and into the night. Winning this final was everything to you all, and you knew deep down, that whilst your career remained a mystery, this was the one thing you could do that would make it up to Leah.

Instead of sitting down next to Leah, you made your way over to Alessia and Ella, both talking about celebrations they wanted to try if they scored the winning goal. As they see you walk over, alessia greets you with a massive smile, before asking you about what you celebration would be.

"I suppose i should do Judes one-" you smile when you mention his name. Both of them laugh and make fun of you for blushing.

"It would probably make sense- tho, you wanna have your signature one y/n." Alessia responds. She then goes on to make fun of Ella's stating that she didn't have one but rather just went through about every single emotion whenever she scored goal.

"There must be a Morrison special-" Ella asks, unsure if she was touching a nerve.

It was true, Noah had his own little celebration. It was something you remembered him doing as early as 5 years old. He'd take a bow, and then clap to all three stages of the auidience, before kissing his little wristband, which their mum had sewn on. That little gesture, always reminded you of how much of a home body your brother remained. Regardless of the fame and the talent he had, that little kiss on the wristband - which had his named engraved on the inside next to a old brighton and hove football badge - would remain a signature of his home.

"Yeah there is." You smile. As you explained his little celebration, how he had taught you from a young age to always thank the audience around you - you felt your heart begin to melt for the first time talking about your brother didn't hurt. A couple of the other girls started getting involved and one by one the group began to bond once again, each taking it in turns to come up with any kind of signature celebration they could do.

As the conversations split once again in the room, leah looked over to you quickly, giving you a smile before starting a conversation with beth. It was a reassuring smile. It was the same smile that Leah used to do whenever you were both stressed about something, it was a way of saying - its not your fault, don't worry. Though you felt like this time, as much as she tried to smile and be the bigger person, her heart was hurting,

Later that night, your phone buzzed with an incoming call from Jude. Hoping for a distraction from the tension with Leah, you eagerly answered.

"Hey, Jude," you greeted, trying to sound cheerful.

"Hey, love. How's everything going?" Jude's voice was warm and caring, but you sensed he was oblivious to the underlying tension you were feeling.

"It's a bit tense here, but I'm managing," you replied, trying to keep the conversation light.

"That's tough. But listen, I've got something exciting to share," Jude said, his voice tinged with enthusiasm. "While I was out today, I saw these amazing dogs at a park here in Madrid. They were so cute, and it got me thinking..."

Your heart sank a little. You knew Jude had been hinting about getting a dog together as a way to bring you closer, possibly even to Madrid. The thought was sweet, but it also added to your stress.

"Uh, that sounds lovely, Jude," you said, trying to hide your agitation. "But hey, let's not talk about dogs right now. How was your day otherwise?"

"Oh, sure, sorry about that," Jude said, sensing your discomfort. "My day was good, but I mostly thought about how much better it would be if you were here with me. I can't wait to see you tomorrow at the final. I've missed you so much, love."

His words were sweet, filled with love and longing. Despite your mixed feelings about the dog situation, you couldn't help but feel touched by his affection.

"I've missed you too, Jude," you replied, your voice softening. "Tomorrow will be a special day, no matter what happens."

"Absolutely," Jude said, his voice growing more romantic. "Tomorrow, we'll be together, and nothing else will matter. I love you, Y/N, and I can't wait to see you and talk about our future—dogs included."

His words, though well-intentioned, added to your internal turmoil. Yet, his love and excitement for your reunion were undeniable, filling you with a mixture of comfort and uncertainty as you ended the call, looking forward to seeing him tomorrow at the final.

"Love you too, Jude," you managed, trying to mask your hesitation. "And I can't wait to see you either. Let's catch up properly tomorrow, okay?"

"Of course, love," Jude responded, picking up on your attempt to change the subject. "We'll have all the time in the world to talk. Just know that I'm here for you, no matter what you're going through."

"Thank you, Jude," you said, grateful for his understanding. "I really appreciate that."

"And hey," Jude added, his voice filled with warmth, "whatever happens tomorrow, whether we win or lose, remember that I'm proud of you and I love you more than anything."

Tears welled up in your eyes at his heartfelt words. "Thank you, Jude," you repeated, your voice trembling with emotion. "I love you too, and I can't wait to see you tomorrow."

"Sleep well, love," Jude said softly, sensing your emotional state. "Dream of happier times, and remember that tomorrow is a new day filled with possibilities."

With a final exchange of loving words, you ended the call, feeling a mix of emotions—love from Jude, tension with Leah, and uncertainty about your future. Yet, despite it all, you felt a glimmer of hope that tomorrow would bring clarity and a chance for healing in all areas of your life.

As the night wore on, sleep eluded you. Tossing and turning in bed, your mind raced with thoughts about the upcoming final, the weight of Noah’s legacy, the tension with Leah, and Jude’s hint about moving to Spain. The pressure was suffocating, each thought adding to your anxiety.

Finally, unable to bear it any longer, you got out of bed and made your way to the bathroom, hoping a splash of cold water on your face might help. But as you looked at your reflection in the mirror, the floodgates opened. Tears streamed down your face as the weight of everything came crashing down on you.

Sinking to the floor, you wrapped your arms around yourself, trying to find some semblance of calm amid the storm of emotions. Each sob felt like a release, yet the overwhelming sense of fear and uncertainty lingered.

“Why is this so hard?” you whispered to yourself, the question echoing in the silent bathroom.

Minutes or maybe hours passed as you sat there, lost in your thoughts and fears. Finally, with a deep, shaky breath, you decided to face the day ahead, no matter how daunting it seemed.

You splashed some water on your face, took a few more deep breaths, and steadied yourself. As you looked at your reflection again, you made a silent promise to give your all in the final, to honor Noah’s legacy, and to find a way to navigate the complexities of your personal life.

As you tried to compose yourself, the door creaked open, revealing Leah, who had stepped out of her room. Seeing you in such a vulnerable state, she immediately dropped her guard.

“Y/N, are you okay?” Leah’s voice was filled with genuine concern as she hurried over to you.

Before you could respond, Leah wrapped her arms around you, pulling you into a comforting hug. Despite the tension between you two, her embrace felt reassuring, a rare moment of solace amid the chaos.

“Come on,” Leah whispered, leading you gently into her room. “Let’s talk.”

Inside her room, Leah closed the door behind you, creating a private space where walls could come down and truths could be shared.

“I’m sorry, Y/N,” Leah began, her eyes filled with regret. “I shouldn’t have pushed you away. We’ve been best friends for too long to let this come between us.”

Tears welled up in your eyes again, but this time, they were different—tinged with relief and gratitude. Leah’s willingness to mend the rift between you was a balm to your wounded soul.

“I’m sorry too, Leah,” you replied, your voice trembling. “I’ve been so caught up in everything—Noah’s legacy, the final, Jude, the idea of moving to Spain—.”

Leah took a deep breath, her gaze unwavering. “Y/N, I can’t lose you. If that means you moving to Spain with Jude, then… then so be it.”

Your heart ached at her words, torn between the love you felt for Leah and the future you had envisioned with Jude. “Leah, I just don’t know,” you admitted, shaking your head.

“You don’t know?” Leah’s voice cracked, disbelief evident in her tone. “I thought you were set on moving.”

“No, Leah,” you replied, your voice trembling. “Jude mentioned getting a dog, moving to Madrid, but I never said yes. I’m so confused.”

A heavy silence filled the room as Leah processed your words. Finally, she spoke, her voice softer, filled with understanding.

“Y/N, you should follow your heart,” Leah said gently, her eyes searching yours. “Whatever that may be, I want you to be happy.”

As Leah led you outside to the balcony, the cool night air enveloped you both, and the city lights twinkled below, casting a soft glow on the scene before you.

“Do you remember,” Leah began, her voice filled with warmth, “when we’d sneak out late at night to play soccer in the park? Just the two of us, chasing after our dreams.”

A smile spread across your face as the memory flooded back. “Oh, how could I forget? We’d stay out until the stars began to fade, pretending we were on the biggest stage, scoring the winning goal.”

Leah chuckled, her eyes shining with mischief. “Yes, and remember how we’d argue over who got to be the striker? We’d each take turns, practicing our victory dances for when we scored.”

You laughed, the vivid memory making your heart swell with nostalgia. “Yes, and you always had that signature celebration, the one where you’d slide on your knees and point to the sky.”

Leah’s eyes sparkled at the mention of it. “And you, Y/N, with your infectious laughter, you’d spin around, arms wide open, soaking in the imaginary applause from the crowd.”

The two of you shared a moment, lost in the memory of simpler times, when dreams were big, and the world seemed full of endless possibilities.

Leah turned to you, her eyes filled with determination and hope. “I see it, Y/N. I see us holding up that trophy tomorrow—just like in our childhood memories. But this time, it’s not made of tin; it’s real.”

Her words resonated with you, reigniting the fire within. The dream you both had as kids was now within reach, a tangible goal that could become reality.

As you were about to head back inside, Leah turned to you once more, her gaze sincere. “He’d be proud, you know.”

A soft smile graced your lips as you replied, “I know.”

“But don’t do it for him,” Leah added gently, “do it for you.”

Her words lingered in the air, a poignant reminder that while honoring Noah’s legacy was important, your journey was ultimately about finding your own path, fueled by your own dreams and aspirations.

"It was always my brother's dream to be at a World Cup final," you began, your voice trembling slightly with emotion. "But more importantly, it was my dream too—one that could become a reality tomorrow."

#fanfiction #jude bellingham #leah williamson #womens world cup #england football #englandwomensfootball #womens football #football fanfic #jude bellingham x reader #jude bellingham x you #lucybronze x reader #jude bellingham fanfic #judebellingham x footballreader #leah williamson x reader #lucybronze x keria walsh

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legoiscrying · 11 months

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Hey!! As soon as I read Poly I immediately wanted to know your HC on the poly main four...but if you don't ship that then can you tell me your Stenny HC?

Ofccc I don't mind poly M4 I'll do HCs on them! :D

This is probably age-uped to young adults btw

1. They like to give each other presents. But!

- Cartman doesn't like to give physical presents (like, small gifts) bc he doesn't really see anything special in them, and also the greed that he still had from his childhood not always lets him to do so. But he most likely to take his boyfriends somewhere nice, like restaurants, entertainment places, shopping centers and all that stuff.

- Kenny is an entire opposite to Cartman. Even when he grows older and has enough money, he still is struggling with wasting large sums so he's not the type of guy to take Stan, Kyle and Eric somewhere fancy. But he likes to make small gifts, and he's very dedicated to that. He's also very attentive to details: like, if Stan says that he saw a game that he always wanted to play, Kenny'd buy him it. And overall if someone mentions a gift that they really want, Kenny will remember that.

- Of all of them, Stan is the least fan of gifts. Although he's usually not the initiator of gift exchanging, if someone gifts him something, he'd be very responsible at finding something in return. Like, seriously, one time Kyle got him a small present at the mall and said "I don't know, just reminded me of you", and Stan went on a whole research on what he should give Kyle in return. He knows Kyle very well, but still usually doesn't trust his own taste in gifts, so he would definitely ask Cartman and Kenny for advise. Kenny helped to navigate, Cartman helped to choose and...Stan bought what he first thought of anyways.

– Kyle is...Complicated. He's as much greedy as Cartman, but he doesn't really talk about plus he'd grown to overcome it a little better. He genuinely saying sucks at giving presents (like, gifting), but here's the other thing: He usually shares his stuff with his boyfriend to the point where his stuff is not only his. "Yes, Kenny, you can borrow any food you want from my fridge", "Here, take my scarf, Stan", "I don't need that, you can use it, Cartman". That kind of stuff. He sometimes complains that guys take his stuff so often, but it's his way of repaying them and making them happy. But romantic gifts? He sucks two times more. He's the type of guy to bring flowers on a date, even tho they know each other for ten years. Still, he likes enjoys giving presents

2. I do this with every poly ship of mine: In which order the guys got together romantically. Expect it's a bit complicated for them, because they've always been a group lol

Stenny, they're the most fastburn of them all and would realize their feelings relatively early > Stan still has his awful crush on Kyle but haven't told Kenny about it yet > Meanwhile Kyman's relationships are staring to develop > Kenman are hanging out together and something is happening > Stan first talks to Kenny, Kenny says he's okay with Stan having other crushes and that he wasn't surprised it's Kyle > Stan confesses to Kyle, Kyle doesn't reject him, but says he needs time to think > Kyman get together and Stan thinks it's kinda over for him and Kyle > Kenman are still hanging out and things are still happening > Kenman get together and they freak Kyle and Stan out by that /pos > Style have a tough conversation and eventually get together too > atp they already realize that the poly circle has happened, so then Stanman and K2 get together too

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c0ffinshit · 6 months

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Hiii can you please write some more Nathan Bratt headcanons? It can be any kind you want to write, I’m just desperate for more content with him and you’re like the only person I could find who writes him. 😭

its alright, don’t worry. lucky for you, i do have some general/romantic/smutty hc that didn’t make the cut the first time around. so, those little headcanons get second life in the form of this post. so i hope you enjoy!! xoxo

warnings: fluff, pet play mentions, bottom!nathan mostly (sorry to the top!nathan truthers), like two mentions of public sex

general and romantic headcanons:

- i will continue to repeat this til i die: THIS MAN HAS AUTISM AND ADHD.

- no i will not elaborate or explain any further

- because literally THIS MAN will take like 2 years to figure out you like him

- but when he does tho… WOOO NELLY he is going to use that fact and NEVER. BRING. IT. UP.

- he is so scared that he’s wrong EVEN THO its so obvious even a helen-keller-type could figure it out

- yknow how people have like a childhood blanket or stuffed animal that they have had since they were a baby… yeah he has one and its a loin

- and he can’t go ANYWHERE without it

- ‼️ROMANTIC HEADCANON ALERT ‼️ okay so he loves watching romcoms with you and cuddle up with a big soft blanket

- was willingly in his school’s D.A.R.E program (iykyk)

- owns and collects star wars legos, will cry if you get him the latest/most expensive set for any holiday

- speaking of holidays, during christmas, he is the type to go ALL OUT in terms of decorations

- big christmas tree with topic of those hallmark ornaments with like snoopy and shit

- the lawn has those big tacky inflatable snow light thingy (like the ones at home depot)

- christmas lights EVERYWHERE. and i mean everywhere

- MATCHING. CHRISTMAS. SWEATER. EVERY. YEAR.

- actually scratch that, he LOVES matching outfits every year

- loves going to the big box stores (macy’s, jc penney, etc.) and taking tacky 80s style photos if they have a photo studio

- his humor is if the phrase “rawr means i love you in dinosaur X3” and the other phrase “well erm… that just happened ☝️🤓” had an unholy baby

- is a bit immature (aka he will giggle if you say “im coming!” in a non-sexual context)

- if you give him a card with a sweet message in it, he will tear up a bit, even if it just says “i love you”

- scared of roller coaster and most other theme parks ride, including dark rides

- scared of the dark in the same way that wiston from new girl is scared of the dark (aka DEADLY AFRAID)

- he thinks you are WAYYYY out of his league

- if you have a pet, he will dress them up in stupid costumes and sent them to you

- speaking of texting, will randomly send you big paragraphs in the middle of the day just talking about how grateful he is to have you in his life

- the KING of good morning and night messages

- he just really really loves texting you even if you are a dry texter (like me)

- he can always make something out of nothing in terms of one word message

- will send pictures of random things with the text “This totally reminds me of us/you! Thinking about you everyday! Love you ❤️❤️”

- this is my long winded way of saying he texts like he’s a nice old lady

- like he will write an entire paragraph talking about his day and if u reply with “okay” HE WILL JUST KEEP GOING ON (asking about your day, talking about stuff that reminded him of you, etc.)

smutty headcanons:

- probably cried the whole time when you had sex with him for the first time

- is open to toys, any toys expect for the first time you made love with him

- has this weird thing about your neck (he focuses on it wayyyy too much)

- very good at fingering and cunnilingus

- will call you ‘miss’ or ‘mistress’ when you top him

- “please miss… i’ll be a good boy. i’ll get on my hands and knees so you can use me as your toy.”

- AUGHHHHH ALSO he has a dirty secret (kinda related to my ‘he secretly has a pet play kink’ thingy)

- okay so the dirty secret is this: when you and him dressed up for halloween one year; the same year you dressed as a sexy cat… he was trying SO HARD to hide his hard on from you

- probably also related to pet play thingy, when you wear those collar chokers-style necklaces, he also gets a hard on

- NO SRSLY THE MINUTE HE SEES YOU IN IT BOOM BONER

- you just look so cute and sexy in anything and everything that you do HE CANT HELP IT

- also doesn’t help that you abuse this fact to your advantage

- you need something? sex? money (which he doesn’t have)? a dog? just wear those hot topic collar chocker things and he’ll give it to you IMMEDIATELY ASAP

- also ALSO hates the term master and daddy

- except for when he was possessed by biddle

- LOVESSS WHEN YOU SIT ON HIS LAP

- its like all the pet play shit HE WILL GET A HARD IN IMMEDIATELY if you sit in his lap

- loves dirty talk (mostly when you do it… since he is a bit rusty at it)

- has a weird thing about smell? (idk i can’t really explain that one im sorry but you’ll have to figure out this one lol)

- also, you’d think because he basically is obsessed with texting you that he would like nudes or sexting

- well you’d be DEAD WRONG. he hates nudes and sexting

- his main reason being “why would i send it in a text when i can say it to you right here?”

- phone sex… is a very different story

- loves phone sex like LOVES LOVES phone sex

- will do it if he’s far away from you and wants to cum so hard

- he also seems like the type to get those long distance relationships sex toys where its like a dildo and a fleshlight and it feels like your partner is fucking you? do you know what im talking about? cuz if you dont, google is free

- if you are also a switch with him, he will get confused on which role to play at first

- you have to be crystal clear with your intentions and his role

- he isn’t the brightest bulb on the christmas tree in terms of sexual and social cues but we (aka me) love them anyways

- has fantasies about you and him having public sex but is too scared to actually commit

- actually, he probably would’ve done it one time at a restaurant where you both teased each with remote controlled vibrators but swore it off after that

#nathan bratt x reader #nathan bratt x reader smut #nathan bratt #justin long x reader #justin long #goosebumps 2023 #goosebumps #justin long x reader smut

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jojo-schmo · 8 months

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Hello! I just discovered your roleswap comic and I'm eating it up, it's so gooooooood. I don't really ship MetaDede personally, but good gods the way you write them bickering and bantering and the near sync when shit gets serious makes me wanna scream in excitement ekdvsiehrhr

AND PRIMAL BANDANA DEE THO

Absolutely my favorite part of the swap. It just makes me crave for an actual Bandana Dee boss fight that actually does him justice. (also the Prince of Dreams/Beasts title itches something in my heart really well)

I'm not sure if it was intentional or if you even know who I'm talking about, but giving Bandana Dee a Scythe at some point (plus some wind abilities) really reminds me of General Gong the Hawkeye from Patapon, what with the whole high-ranking, scythe wielding, wind-adjacent thing. Probably just a coincidence tho, but I personally love it!

Hope to see the next update! :D

(P.S. while I was reading the comic, some of the links are broken or straight up missing. I'm reading from the Tumblr app so it's a bit of a hassle. Just thought I'd let u know :D)

Hello there!! Oh my goodness, what a wonderful ask, thank you so much for telling me all of this! As a person who thrives on Words of Affirmation, these types of comments mean absolutely everything to me. <3

If I may go on a tangent about the shipping thing because I'm glad you brought that up. It's a huge complement to hear you say that because-

The Roleswap comic is not a story about romance. But it is about love.

While I am a personal lover of metadede and it fueled my initial creation of this story, I want to take the Roleswap AU in a different direction from a story that's focuses on a ship where "the main characters act the way they do because they are in love or a couple." A "partnership" like theirs can possibly be interpreted as a build up to a romance. But it doesn't have to be! So there's no blatantly romantic interactions anywhere in this story like what may be found in my non-Roleswap, specifically metadede labeled content (Like kisses, confessions of love, etc.).

Dedede and Meta do love each other, like the other protagonists of Kirby love each other. Kirby, Bandana Dee, all the other Waddle Dees, the Meta-Knights, and the friends they've made over the years. The love between many of them has developed over the entire series! They've all come a long way from fighting each other to trusting one another and even having fun together!

I see the love between the Kirby protagonists as one where they care about and want the best for each other. They may not always understand the other's thoughts and motivations. But they respect them and learn to complement each other's differences. They protect each other in battle. They grow together and learn to bring out the best in each other.

So how could two very different and powerful authority figures like Dedede and Meta come together to save their friends and family, and navigate a huge world and an unknown conflict together? That's the main question I want to present in this story.

Whatever the interpretation of the King and Knight's relationship a reader may have, I'm most happy about the fact that this comic has readers!!!

Anyway!! Back to your ask! :D

Primal Bandana Dee means a lot to me too! The only reason this comic exists is because I also wanted a cool boss fight for him, and I had just finished playing Forgotten Land for the first time. It all just branched out from there. I wish I could just spill everything I have planned for him, but alas! I have a story with a set order to tell! I will say that if anyone is worried about not seeing him until the Winter Horns area, that he will make appearances before that. Just stay tuned!

And hey. This is an AU of an existing story. We know how the canon ending went already. To keep things interesting I have to include some surprises in my version down the line somewhere, right? ;)

I also haven't heard of Patapon so the resemblance between General Gong and Bandee is a coincidence! I did look it up and General Gong looks cool!! I respect scythe wielders, haha. Thanks for telling me! If this is a game I have the ability to play it could be fun to check it out!

New Roleswap update is coming soon! I feel bad that it's been about a month and I left it on a bit of a cliffhanger. But my personal and work life is slowing down enough for me to make more progress on the next pages! Our heroes will get out of the underground tunnel soon! :O

Maybe I can offer this behind-the-scenes peek of Dedede's internal monologue in the dark tunnel as a thank you for the patience?

Finally, big thanks for letting me know about the broken links! I'll sit down on my computer soon and clean up all the links. I sometimes post on mobile and sometimes on web so maybe that messed some things up.

But if anyone needs a non-tumblr reading experience, I've also hosted the story on Comic Fury for a simpler navigation! Link is in the pinned masterpost on this blog, but also here: https://forgottenlandroleswap.the-comic.org/

Thanks for reading this director's commentary! Toodle-oo!

#roleswap ask #forgotten land roleswap #king dedede #meta knight #metadede related content #kirby and the forgotten land

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palialaina · 4 months

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See, when I say I'll side with Zeki over Subira, it's because Zeki is... under all his guff and snark, a puffball.

So, apparently there was a bit of chaos at the market after I left last time, resulting in some wishes being knocked off the tree. Chayne asked me to ask around because he has his post next to the tree and can't wander, so I did, and man.

No lies, I cracked up when Naj told me what she saw, and again when Zeki confirmed it. I wish I could've seen that. Like. Kenli, of all people, scaring the shit out of Zeki? Zeki jumping like... ten feet into the air???

Glorious, man. And I missed it.

(Zeki was not amused at my amusement, but no claws came out, so, I win.)

Zeki was pretty put out about the whole thing coming to light, and still a bit fussed about the wishes thing, but he said I could tell Chayne, so I did. Chayne was better about not laughing than I was, honestly.

Went off and did some stuff at home, napped like a sensible person, and then went back the next night, cause Zeki asked me to meet him there so we could talk about some stuff. He actually opened up quite a bit about how he missed his family, even his obnoxious siblings (can't relate, though I do still have that ache when I wonder what my life was before all... this.), and remenisced a bit about how his Dad had taken them to his first Luna New Year market, and gotten them all candy.

And how he wished, as a kitten, to come to another one with his family.

Well, I might be a smart-ass on occasion, but I can't let that go, so I went over to Chayne and asked him if he had some candy we could give to Zeki to make him feel less alone. Chayne then suggested I get people to write nice notes to Zeki too, to remind him that he's part of the village, Majiri or not.

When I tell you he cried, man. He didn't let me hug him or anything, but he did get all teary-eyed and sentimental. It was pretty sweet that he realized that maybe he didn't have blood-kin around, but the villagers regard him as one of their own.

And honestly, that's really what I love about Kilima, and the people here. They did that for Zeki, for me, and for every human that appears from the Phoenix Shrine, whether they stay in Kilima or go somewhere else.

I still have some stuff at the market I want to get, and I think I've gotten the hang of that hotpot game too. So I'll keep going for a few more nights, and see if there's anything else I can do around there to help out. I wish Hassian would come, but there's still chappa for the chappa chase, so that's probably a hard no. Was nice to see Sifuu there, and Dad too. Apparently Subira said she'd watch the inn for him so he could come and celebrate, which was nice. She's not all that bad, but I don't know that I'll ever trust her, or the Order.

In less dramatic news, all my bay windows have been finished, and I love them.

I had to rearrange my room a bit tho, and I'm still not entirely settled on how it looks. I need more cushions to sit on too. And blankets. Bet I could ask Hassian and he'd get me some nice ones. Or Jel. Hmm...

Oh, and Chayne gave me this big box of Luna New Year sweets. There's no way I'm going to finish this off any time soon! Mine didn't come with sweet notes the way Zeki's did, but you know what? It's gonna be a good memory just the same.

#palia #palia online #singularity 6 #berry plays palia #palia game #palia journaling #palia journey #palia roleplaying #palia mmo

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otakween · 4 months

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Zero Men - Volume 1

Now that I've finished 0-Sen Hayato, this manga was next on the list, another oldie. At least this time it's by the Godfather of all manga, Osamu Tezuka. I think this is his first work I've ever read??? Apparently no one cares about it because there's very little English material on it. Oh well, the main character is cute!

Ch. 1

Omg I'm loving this so far! The art is so dynamic and cute and the dialogue is really colorful too. The protagonist Ricky is adorable ;w; I love his tail.

That was a pretty badass and hilarious opening with the two soldiers fighting a pointless war while also low key bonding over a baby they saved.

Ricky crying when his dad told him his tail was something to be ashamed of broke my damn heart! Glad the dad isn't fully evil though. Just misguided...

Kind of weird that the dad is like "I swear I'll find you a doctor!" Like dude...you've had many years to do that and it probably would have been easier when the kid was an infant.

Ch. 2

Obvious parental death is obvious. Ricky sure got over it quick lol.

So, so far we know that 0 men can survive extreme temperatures, are really fast learners, and have great agility. I think this is an Elfen Lied scenario where they're supposed to be "evolved humans." Making them squirrel like was kind of a weird choice but oh well.

The professor's design where he basically just has a cloud for a head reminds me of Dr. Uranus from Cyborg 009. Peak old dude character design lol.

Losing one dad and then instantly meeting your real dad is pretty wild. The emotional whiplash made it all feel kind of rushed and silly. It's nice that Ricky doesn't feel like a freak anymore tho. Kind of an ugly duckling story.

Ch. 3

Woah, suddenly the story gets very different. Forget the evil scientists, it's time for robot demons apparently! New bad guys are Enma (Buddhist God of Hell) and Satan. Fun for the whole family!

Enma kinda looks like one of the guards from Squid Game lol, simple but menacing

The scene where Enma and Satan make an entire lighthouse disappear and the keep jumps out to save his life was effectively frightening. I wonder if that guy will come back as a witness?

All of Tokyo is ripped apart and put back together in like an hour and everyone just shrugs it off!? I know Japanese people can be complacent, but not THAT complacent!

This chapter felt like an anti-communist message with every house being exactly the same but "something's missing." I googled it and apparently Tezuka was a communist, but only for a short time before he changed his tune, so it's still possible that's what he was going for.

Ch. 4

So apparently the professor is a good guy now (despite first impressions) as he teams up with Ricky to investigate Enma.

We learn that 0-men are closer biologically to squirrels than they are to humans...riiight. The adults definitely looked more squirrel-like at least.

Pretty savage of the professor to shoot up his friend with a gun to "check if he's human" (including a shot to the head!?) Reminds me of the original Stepford Wives when the MC stabs her friend in the crotch.

The way Tezuka draws the prime minister feels very Looney Tunes. He's very rubbery.

Ch. 5

This manga is very text heavy so the average chapter takes me a bit to get through. Luckily, the Japanese has been very easy so far! (Rare for an older manga...)

Ricky and the Professor escape the clutches of King Enma who was planning to kill them if they didn't reveal the whereabouts of the 0 men. They end up in the forest where Ricky finds his mom and dad again. They ask Ricky to return to their country with them but he turns them down because he's vowed to be an "ally of humanity."

I can see why King Enma wears a mask...he's pretty dweeby looking under there. I like his mad scientist hair though. The fact that his face is a little disfigured gives Darth Vader vibes.

Ch. 6

Ricky and the professor try to alert the public about King Enma's take over. People start to be swayed, but then Enma just kills anyone who tries to join the resistance, so they don't get very far. By the end of the chapter Ricky is captured again by another power hungry person after the 0 men. Gdi Ricky...

I know it's for plot convenience but Ricky's tail pops out so easily that you'd think they'd come up with a better strategy for hiding it than stuffing it into his pants by now.

Ch. 7

Ricky splits up from the professor and finds himself captive on a boat. His 0 men parents come to save the day (apparently this was like a 0 men slave ship) and they knock out their captors.

Ricky just did a dramatic goodbye to his parents in chapter 6 and now he's back with them again? Make up your mind, story!

I was proud that I was able to read the kanji 船長. The videos I've watched of Marine-Senchou (vtuber) helped me out with that one.

We end the chapter in the jungle of the Himalayas. Maybe we'll learn more about 0 man culture?

Ch. 8

Uhhh wtf!? Ricky's dad just dies in an avalanche and they're like "meh, whatever!" Seriously Ricky and his mom recovered from that way too quickly. He might not really be dead, but they believe he is!!

It was cool seeing how the 0 men have been evading humans by living in a place that's only reachable by their species. That felt believable. I bet their land is nicer than the weird place Ricky was living before anyways. No dictators (I hope lol)

Ch. 9

Lol my previous statement was immediately proven wrong in this chapter. Ricky basically went from living in 1984 to Brave New World. I quickly went from enjoying learning about 0 men culture to being like...oh...that's not good.

Kind of confusing that Ricky's mom would intentionally bring her son into this world if she knew how messed up it was? She even is like "here's our apartment where we'll live as a big happy family" but then Ricky learns that kids are separated from their parents super early in this world and sent to live in a children's village. Like...did she not think of that??

Why was chapter 9 like 3 times longer than chapter 8? Well, I've been enjoying the kanji reading challenge. This manga has no furigana...

Ch. 10

Man this story is cyclical. They escape, they get captured, they escape, they get captured. Tezuka also seems to have ditched who I thought was the main villain for now. Will this whole thing be episodic or will we get a real plot?

They come across some yeti in their travels who say "yeti yeti" like Pokémon lol. I wouldn't mind seeing them make friends with all the cryptids, but the visit was very short.

Ricky's mom asking him to shoot her tail off with a gun was pretty dark. It does seem like it would make their lives a lot easier to remove their tails (in hopefully a less painful way), but I guess it's the principle of it.

Dude at they end looked like a Cyborg 009 character with his giant buttons and fancy hair haha.

Ch. 11

And just like that we gain another random party member (and Ricky's mom gains her 2nd adopted son in like 2 chapters). Ricky and Pete bond over their daddy issues.

I was wrong, they did bring Enma back. He reveals that his new, Communist version of Tokyo was inspired by the 0 man way of living, so I guess that explains that.

Like I said, we're going in circles here. Now we're back to looking for the professor Ricky befriended in earlier chapters. After the gang finds a safe place to live, then what? Are they going to save the world from oppressive regimes? Is the goal to just be a normal, happy family?

Ch. 12

So apparently the professor they eventually find is some kind of fake (even though he passed Ricky's needle test). Can Tezuka decide if this dude is a good guy or a bad guy already!?

Kinda funny how when they found a safe place to hide out they're like "now let's confront the evil people!" Like...weren't you running to hide from the evil people? Well I guess heroes gotta hero.

Ch. 13

So now it's doomsday via Mt. Fuji erupting. Although the gang succeeded in destroying Satan's clone factory, they now need to worry about the fate of humanity.

The version of this that I got from Bookwalker is 4 volumes but MAL has it at 7 volumes, so this must be an omnibus. I wonder where the original volume 1 cut off?

That first volume was kind of all over the place. The plot progression didn't feel all that natural, but I think this was one of those stories that was supposed to be a one-off and then got expanded, so whatever. Let's see where things go in volume 2...

#0-man #osamu tezuka #manga #bookwalker

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kaelsleftverdantsphere · 1 year

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A pocket full of nightshade

This thingy is strongly inspired by my own experiences and numerous talks with my own father while still keeping Genn bareable (so, not as bad as my dad lol)

Sort of a vent fic, but hopefully not that bad, although really, read at your own risk

Dealing with neglect, loss of a loved one and all the trauma and familial tension that comes with those topics

╞═════𖠁𖠁═════╡

Tess found herself in a room that felt, somehow, way colder than she ever remembered it. The Stormwind Keep was not her favourite place for a wide multitude of reasons but the bonechilling cold of the stone all around, in a way so similar to her birthplace, was certainly one of them. It reminded her of all that could have been. Of all that she could have had.

She was lost in thought. Her mind in a whole different place, with Liam, within the walls that promised them safety... That inherently failed.

What brought her out of her own head was footsteps. Heavy footsteps on the cold, cold floor. She immediately knew who they belonged tho. Her whole body tensed as she turned her head to the source.

"Tess..." Her father's voice came in rough, but not a warning. He looked tired, his eyes telling many gutwrenching stories she did not want to get into. "You came."

She wondered for a moment. What should she respond to that? Of course she came, he can obviously see that. Why would he even say that? Is there nothing he would like to ask her?

"Yes... I did." She managed to get past her lips. "I heard that- Anduin is currently not present."

"Indeed..." He nodded, nervously looking around. "Is that why you-?"

"Not entirely I just... Wanted to see you since you never try to make time for me." She was frowning, she came here to pick a fight after years of searching for validation. But there was still a little girl behind all those thoughts fighting to run out and hug her dad.

He looked into her eyes before closing his eyes for a short bit. "I have a lot of work, Tess-"

"I understand that, but how long has it been since we've last properly seen each other? Not weeks, not months... Years." She was not able to control her tone well anymore. It was either crying or talking through bared teeth and she swore that she will not cry infront of him again.

Because after all, that's what always happened. They argued, she cried and ran away but- that's not happening this time.

"Tess... You are your own woman now, I can't keep standing behind you-"

"Oh yes, but the prince is not his own man? Is he not an adult? Why must you watch over him but not care for your own blood?"

"You know it's not like that!" He sounded... He sounded so very sad. And for a moment, she wanted to believe him.

"It is like that!" Her hands flew up in the air in frustration. "It's not even as if I need your attention or you to be there for me all the time I just want you to be my dad, light damn it!"

"I will always be your father, Tess, what are you talking about?"

"A father, yes, but any man can be a father... A dad is different. A dad sends you letters asking you how you've been, a dad visits you to tell you how you should take better care of yourself and tells your partner that he'll beat them up when they hurt you... A dad is not indifferent... A dad cares." She had to take a deep breath after vomiting all her words out with the speed of an average Kul Tiran. "Hell, even Shaw is being a better dad to Vanessa than you are to me! And they aren't even related!"

"I do care, Tess, it's just difficult with everything-"

"You keep repeating the same things over and over again. You really think that makes it understandable for me? The years of you just not being there? The years I had to take care of myself? Do you even know me anymore?"

He opened his mouth multiple times, a couple of huffs coming out but no words truly forming. He could pass for a wounded wolf now and... That hurt something deep within Tess.

"Do you even know your daughter?" She wanted to sound strong, but her words came out a whine. She was pleading, begging for an answer.

He looked into her eyes, both of their eyes stinging with barely disguised tears but both of them so light-damn stubborn. "Liam said the same thing to me once..." He whispered, his voice soft beyond belief from such a big man. "'Do you even know your son, dad? Do you care about him?' he said... He had the same biting tone you do, young one. And I could not blame him."

"Can you blame me?" She rubbed her eyes, trying to get rid of the tears welling up in them. "Can you look me in the eyes and tell me that my pain does not make sense and that I am to blame for the strain of our relationship?" She sniffled and straightened her back, standing tall and as intimidating as possible while sobbing.

"That is not what I said, child... " He looked away for a moment, carefully picking out words. "I don't want to blame you but... You don't speak to me when we see one another. You don't share your life with me. How am I to know you've been feeling this way?"

"So you're telling me it is my fault? I don't talk to you because you don't listen! You don't care!"

"I do! I have always cared for both of my children, what do you not understand about that?"

"Then why did you stop caring about me the second he passed?" Tears now streaming down her cheeks. "The second he was gone I was just as well... Nothing but a memory of a little girl you once loved as your own... "

"That is not true... I-I... I lost my son! My only son! You cannot even imagine how that felt!"

"I lost a brother! My closest friend! And I lost everyone else I have ever cared about that day!" She yelled at him, hardly concealing how broken her voice must have sounded.

"What are you talking about now?"

"The moment I lost my brother I lost my entire family, Genn..." She frowned at the oh so familiar man standing infront of her. "I am no orphan but on days like these I wish I could state I were."

He stopped, dead in his tracks, again, not finding a single word worthy of being said out loud.

"I am getting married, Genn..." She turned her back to the man. "I just... Wanted to let you know... That I am happy... And that she cares..."

And with that, she left. Walking away, holding her head high for as long as she could before the last piece of her strong persona shattered.

In the end, she could not help but blame herself for her father feeling so horrible. She left him there, so broken, when she should have held him above water... Or maybe she did everything right... Maybe he- Maybe he did deserve every drop of poison she had put into her speech and more.

For now, she was not sure.

#tess greymane #genn greymane #VanTessa in the background #emotional damage #i cried 50 times while writing this #this was blood sweat and tears and it still came out really bad #i am sorry #SPHERE FICS

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lil-melody-moon · 5 months

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Year Summary #3

We're going with games today so without further ado!

The ones I've started and finished: 1. Pokemon Moon - Second/third time that I played it. I had started a save a long time ago, but I borrowed my 2DS to a dear friend of mine, so I just started everything from beginning. I enjoyed it as much as the first time actually, getting different Pokemon this time - or kind of? This is also where I discovered that tiny Pancham looks like Paul McCartney. Don't ask me from where I took it, but yeah. I named my Pancham Paul XD

2. Final Fantasy IX - I figured out that there has to be at least one Final Fantasy game during the year and this time it happened to be this one. Again, a replay, third fucking save. I had a new pc at that time, had to install Moguri again but you know. The worst was the fact that the old saves were gone, along with the one where I almost did everything in the time before the final boss. My first, almost complete save was gone, I was sad about that. That didn't discourage me tho, I played the game again, only to regret that I didn't use other names than default - it would be so fun, I have to do it next time. Anyway, I still love this game, I will gladly come back to it at any day really - crying at the end again, God, the credits song ;A;

3. Rayman 3: Hoodlum Havoc - I think this platformer will come back to the list of "play at least once a year". I love this games to bits, first platformer, my entire childhood and beginning of being a nerd is stored there - and again, Polish dub in this game is *chef's kiss*

4. Rayman Legends - replay after a few years and as much as I love the musical levels, the game itself is fun to certain point, I think halfway through, it gets kind of repetitive - or it might be me who played this game way too much in the past. Either way, I'm not coming back to it anytime soon. Had fun nevertheless tho <3

5. Murder by Numbers - got Epic Games Store, got my hands on free games and there I went, choosing this one as the first one. It has repetitive mechanic over finding clues - it's a detective kind of game, similar to Ace Attorney, but much more tame - but like, if you're bored you can cheat through them just to get on with the plot. I did that at the very end and really, I enjoyed the plot, characters, music. The tiny computer who helped the main heroine was adorable <3

6. Earthbound - you thought I will forget to play it? HAH, jokes on you! The end of year is nearing and my mind is already set on to play it again! I will never grow bored of this game and this time the team consisted of Ringo, me, John and Paul, Beatles themed team and truth be told, I WAS SO FUCKING UNLUCKY ON THIS SAVE. Like, I even did simplest mistakes, forgetting about the freaking shields which got me an instant kill. Had to repeat the last cave three fucking times, I never had such a bad playthrough in my life! Ringo borrowed his luck this time it seems

7. Spyro the Dragon - what did I do when I got a new PC? Downloaded PSX emulator and played Spyro. I'm a whole mood as my friend described me and honestly I don't regret this decision, even if I had to take this game in parts. The camera made me sick to my stomach - oh God I hope it'll be better in later parts and in the remaster - but like taking one level per day was a good idea to solve the problem. Plus the soundtrack - Copeland my beloved! - is just so good. One of those games which soundtracks I'll be listening to when I have time. ...Which reminds me that I have to make cleaning on yt with the games' music. MAJOR CLEANING *looking at my young self* You did fucked it up

8. Deponia - Oh yes, I came back to his fuckery and now I'm having a break before tackling the second game which I don't like very much, but about this one! The beginning is kinda long, but once out of town the game shows what it is capable of with puzzle solving, plot, humor, characters. I still love it and will probably nerd the third part like I usually do, because it's my favorite, but this time I did one major change. I've played with English dub, not like always with German and fuck, it is better somehow so I'm sticking to that <3

Now to the ones I've dropped: 1. The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess - Being younger I loved this game, but this time I just couldn't get into it anymore. Might be because my smart ass thought about erasing the save I didn't finish years ago and starting a new one, but who might know. I do regret I didn't finish the game for some weird reason those years ago, but maybe it was for the better? Either way, I sold it with a few other Nintendo Wii games, leaving only two Kirby games for myself so yeah

2. Mario and Luigi: Partners in Time - now I really had high expectations for this one. I always heard good opinions about it and so I started it, curious, only to discover that I'm bored of it in the long run. There's not much variety in the battle mechanics. You either do that or this and push buttons. There's no excitement like it is in Final Fantasy for example, it's simpler, much much simpler and the same goes too...

3. Super Mario RPG - while having an amazing soundtrack, this game suffers the same thing as the previous. Repetitive battle mechanics and like this is probably the worst thing you can do to rpg. I know a lot of people love it and I can see why. The plot is great, dialogues, characters and world building is amazing, but for me if the battle mechanics ain't anything good, then I'm gonna drop the game and move on

4. Kirby Mass Attack - I always wanted to play this game. It was actually the first ROM I've downloaded on Nintendo DS emulator right after getting new PC and I had fun in the first world. I love the mechanics with the touch screen, the fact that there's 10 tiny Kirbys running around, but what threw me off guard is the fact that even if you have 10 Kirbys, you're gonna end with one at the beginning of the next world. I felt like all the progress was lost and I had to start from the very beginning. It somehow didn't feel fair you know. This was a big let down

And the ones I'm playing now: 1. Cave Story - first time after hearing what a good game it is, and I finally agree with an opinion! It's smooth, like the older games, the graphics are cute, music is amazing, plot simple, but engaging somehow. And true, some part for a new player are difficult - I'm playing on easy, I don't think of myself as of a great gamer and I still find it difficult. One boss was really unreadable for me, the one who was driving, I don't know the name of it, but like I had to have a few tries to figure out what to do and that is the only complaint I have about this game. Second would be no checkpoints between bosses at the very end, but like there was a chance for me to get a life refill, but like I didn't know about it, so I screwed myself on my own wish. Plus, I'm having a break from it because I'm stuck at final bosses. In the meantime I jumped to this one:

2. Yooka Laylee - which I bought on sale on steam and honestly, I don't remember when I had such a great time with a 3D platformer since Rayman 3. I know a lot of people are saying that it's not the same as Banjo-Kazooie - which I didn't play YET - but like, is it really worthy to compare instead of having fun with a game? I mean, the plot is simple, characters are fun, mechanics are great, the moveset is good, it's not limiting the player at all, the freaking soundtrack is a whole orchestra really, always giving the vibe of the world in a great way. There are a few bugs here and there, but they are not game breaking or anything. I was only throw off my guard when I learned that I need 100 pagies to get to the end. Guess what I am doing as of lately XD

And that would sum up this year. Thank you for reading all of this and i wish all of you a Happy New Year <3

#this one is probably longer than the one in the last year #I think XD #talking corner

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annyankers · 1 year

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Have you given us a breakdown on Anya (Train’s version) yet? I’m loving your recent Anya posts and want to know more

kdjlsfghdfjklsg OKAY!!!!! ANYANKA!!!! TRAIN'S VERSION!!!!!

First off I fancast her with Emma Myers now or Maya Hawke in the recent past. I feel both of them could handle the role and both are closer looking to the 17-18yo age we’d need for S3!Anya which is one of my main reasons for even recasting Anyanka bc lbr... Emma Caulfield is iconic in the role no notes really on her end. But yeah, both could pull off that “alien who just moved to earth tries to hang with the teenz” vibes that are so integral to the Anya experience.

After that I just lean WAY more into her established backstory and season 3 personality, you know, how she was before they flanderized her to hell and back. Basically more of a cranky adult trapped in a shitty mortal teen body and having to deal with all this shit they can’t remember from their own youth and probably didn’t have to even deal with the first time around. Her moods are all over the place in S3-4 since she’s so new to being mortal and like...18 years old. It’s like being boss baby and needing a nap lol.

She also has beef with Willow and Giles from day one and actually develops a real friendship with Cordelia and Faith-- basically if they’re in the Scooby sphere but not well liked by the Scoobies proper they’re gonna end up friends with Anyanka. Which means by the end of the series she’s homies with Cordelia, Faith, Spike, Oz, Angel, Wesley, Andrew, etc. The only one I don’t think she’d have time for is Amy and that’s entirely because she doesn’t have time for her or Willow and their issues with magic, superiority complexes and how little they listen to her even tho she’s you know, their obvious magical superior on the knowledge front.

Circling back to Willow and Giles it’s because she’s the anti-Willow and anti-Giles in some ways and until a better set up is thought up she’s basically the spirit and mind of the shadow self hands-heart-spirit-mind metaphor that the scoobies take on. She and Spike are basically already the Rowdy Ruff Boys to the Scoobies’ Powerpuff Girls as is. She’s already kind of established as a shadow Willow in the show but I wanna you know...... NOT FORGET SHE CAN DO MAGIC FOR LIKE 4 SEASONS.

Without her demonic powers Anyanka is not as strong of a witch as Willow when it comes to pure strength. But she was an extremely gifted one even before she got 1,000+ years to hone her craft and learn more. She can buy and sell Willow and Giles any day of the week, they basically only win against her because Buffy’s the slayer, luck, MC powers etc etc yada yada. She’s also not afraid to remind them of this fact which makes Willow especially very insecure and dislike her a LOT. Along with that Anyanka still lacks a filter nor cares to get one. She probably also backed Faith’s whole bad slayer shit for a while like “yeah you go girl get your revenge!!!! (and also idk can you maybe help me get my powers back or like??? talk to your boss about it????? idk idk)”. bc ofc she’s not giving up on that so easily and also you know, Faith is a pretty wronged lady and old habits die hard. Also it parallels the Buffy-Willow friendship and makes it all sexy and evil and shadow self-y.

ofc once she realizes what he wants to do is Ascend she’s like LOL NVM I’M OUT!!!! LOL BYEEEEEE!!!!!

I’d still have her going to prom with Xander, negging him when she asks him and terrorizing him unintentionally the whole night. It’s comic gold. But I want her entry into being a main cast member to not be wholly dependent on her riding his dick on the reg like in canon so she’s the first person to bang on Buffy’s door and be like “something’s happening to the Sunnydale demon population!!!!” because ofc she still cares about them, in her brain she’s not human, she’s a demon. This whole mortal form thing is temporary really. Her and Xander is a background courting ritual of freaks and losers incomprehensible to all around them. It’s not the slap slap kiss vibes of Xander/Cordelia but it still has the same “whAT--?!?!?” moment and top tier comedic duo timing.

Anya only really starts to see herself as human when she breaks her arm in 5x2 and even then it’s very uneasy. It’s like 8 kinds of crisis she’s combatting here guys.

Also starting in S4 she and Spike are besties. Again it’s a shadow self, my demons are their own angels, us but sexier energy. They’re serving Scoobies from the Negaverse. They’re giving “this could be you Buffy but you playing”. They’re also like, the greek chorus in the back being like “uhhhhhh what’s with the gross human-centric ethics you creeps?”. They’re another next level comedy duo. Could’ve removed his chip the whole time but he never asked so she never offered. She mentions this casually in Season 7 and he mcloses it over that for several episodes, it’s a running gag.

Anya and Willow have Tension from Season 4 on about being the Magical Girl of the group. The Scoobies all naturally pick Willow pretty consistently over Anya but then Willow Fucks Up (something blue etc) and they turn to Anya to fix it. It’s a popularity contest and they all know it and it makes Anya bitter and Willow even more insecure. This feeds into her Dark Willow Arc later. Also, she and Anya have a Wizard Fight at the end of Season 6 and it’s Sick Nasty.

Xander still leaves her at the altar because I think that’s actually very important to both of their characters and she does still become a demon again. The major difference is that she doesn’t then stop being one in Season 7. She ends out the series still a demon and the confrontation in the frat house actually is basically a psychological boss battle for Buffy that gets into shit relevant to the season and her own struggles.

Anyanka never really asked for this, she was basically tricked/manipulated both times into becoming a demon but she also gains incredible powers from being like this that realistically she wouldn’t want to give up as they’re a part of her now. Her identity is malleable, she’s been treated like she doesn’t get to have one, she has to fight to make one of her own. she’s in a position when she’s controlled by a cruel man and if she goes outside the lines or does things she feels are right the consequences are dire. She is Buffy, she’s the demon side of Buffy. The counterpoint to Dawn’s innocent youthful human girl, she’s the grown adult demon woman. She’s representing the struggles Buffy is dealing with now in herself and the plot. Buffy ends up deciding to not punish her for the murders both yes because of friendship but also because Anyanka is an irreplaceable asset, even more so now that she’s a demon again, and Buffy cannot afford to lose any of those right now. A logic that Anyanka actually approves of.

I enjoy Anya’s fish out of water and no filter vibes in the original but I hate how they consistently forget she’s smart until it’s useful again. Like lbr, S4-7 Anya is basically just there to say something cringe or funny or say “when i was a demon--” before being shunted to the back again so the Most Important People could talk. Season 3 Anya was cunning, acerbic, clever, knew the basics of how things work in the mortal world and I’m sorry-- I know it’s very important to many people but I hate her monologue in The Body. I just HATE it.

She’s been killing people for over a thousand years. She knows what death is and how it works. She knows it means this person will never eat eggs a-fucking-gain sHE KNOWS THIS!!!!! Now if this was about the emotionalness of that loss-- of being the one to actually do the losing I wouldn’t hate it!!! That actually tracks. Anyanka is basically immortal and likely as never had a single person she truly cared about die in that time. It would make sense if she understands that Joyce is dead but doesn’t know how to react to that or process it. Loss is a thing she inflicts, it’s not done to her. She wouldn’t know what to do with herself.

Also she doesn’t give a stupid fucking speech about running away that makes NO sense and just TELLS YOU SHE’S GONNA DIE with a fucking FOGHORN and then DIES POINTLESSLY IN THE FINALE. ABSOLUTELY NOT.

#anyanka (train's version)#answered #excited to talk more about my brain versions of people lol #i'm touched people even want to read these honestly NONE of them are short rip

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dynamicspacebud · 1 year

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was just doing my moms dishes bc i felt bad for her when i just really started to dwell on how she is as a mother like WOW is she a SHIT mom and i mean that like my god she is awful. I don’t like to remember stuff like this or hold it in my head like how i really have to dig deep to re-remember all the ways my father is horrible but right now with her i don’t know i want to write down what i was thinking about. How less than a year earlier we had to change the locks on the door because he threatened to come even though she said no and i got really scared and started having terrible nightmares about him coming in and killing us and then she just surprise told me he is was coming over one day and completely disregarded my concerns and feelings about how i told her i felt uncomfortable and unsafe with him around she just did not care and was so selfish even though this was supposed to be my home too. Or how that night she was like I’m an adult i can have casual sex when i simply asked if he was staying the night and she was like i’m just being honest when i went wtf as though a year prior she didn’t blame me for him financially/ sexually abusing her for getting money for sex and she blamed me because i was using her credit card and not paying bills as though i wasn’t a teenager who didn’t even know any of this was happening i just got blamed. How could she even put that on me i knew then and now it wasn’t and had never been my fault but that’s such a sick thing to say honestly it makes my stomach curl. Her asking how and why my relationship with my father has to reflect and effect my relationship with her as though i didn’t write a whole fucking peer reviewed essay about how it does like how is she so fucking awful as a mother like i’m very glad i was born but god she should have never been someone to take care of someone else or anything else like how she also abandoned her cat when her boyfriend wanted her too. It’s so sick i don’t and never did deserve the terrible parents i have. I don’t want them. I cant wait to get to a place when i can genuinely never have contact with them again. Seeing and being reminded of it all holds me back i know that. I don’t want that. I cant have that. And every year in close and closer to breaking away. I’ll get there i know i will and i’ll never have parents i’ll only have s** and a***** but i’ll still watch bluey and cry cry cry because someone has those parents and that makes my heart warm enough. And maybe i’ll even be that parent one day. Mine are so beyond awful i will and can never be them it’s not even possible. I’m very lucky i got out i mean look at my shit brother that hateful bigot. Good for him tho he barley talks to them i wish i were him in only that way. They hurt him more than me and because he’s cishet and grew up in a rich highschool i think that’s why he turned out that way. I don’t know i want to say maybe he has changed but as a cop i know it’s impossible he has. I won’t have any contact to my immediate bio family. My uncle today asking me how long it’s been since i talked to my brother and me saying years. I mean often i genuinely forget i have a brother which is funny in a way because we lived together until i was like 19 it’s not even like we didn’t grow up together or he left when i was young. My mind just has such a strong way of blocking everything out. It’s for my own protection but i don’t know how good that is honestly. Like with hannah it did the same thing. Nes being like I REMEMBER how do you not ??? you were so close and i have to really think about it or see pictures or texts to remember and when i do it’s strong and im sad. I guess my mind doesn’t want me to be sad. But i don’t know i don’t think that’s a good thing. Not entirely. Ok funny enough im rewatching the 100 and they have kind of touched on this subject with raven not remembering finn and jaha not remembering his son but them being “happy” because they can’t feel the pain of losing them even though they don’t remember the happy and good stuff either. I think that’s kind of what my mind is

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jojolightningfingers · 1 year

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I am here to ask 4, 10, and 18 for the ask meme :3c

:3c

Do you outline before you start writing? If so, how far do you stray from that outline?

I used to not outline at all but within the past five years or so yes, I do outline things! although i wouldn't say i outline BEFORE i start writing, necessarily, in every case. sometimes you're in the middle of writing something big and realize wait a moment this is too complex for my tiny little brain and you have to organize all your thoughts somewhere external. herding plotbunnies. Still I think i do a fairly good job of staying mostly within whatever outline happens. leaving aside the part where i cut out parts entirely bc i cannot find a good way to make them WORK.

Do you enjoy writing dialogue, exposition, or plot the most?

Exposition and honestly it isn't even close. Plot's neat but like... 90% of what I write is character-centric so any 'forward motion' is more expository about the character ANYWAY. And dialogue......... i'm ngl i struggle with dialogue. I'm always trying to avoid the 'they would not fucking say that' response. i think i'm getting better tho!

What is a line/scene you’re really proud of? Give us the DVD commentary for that scene.

man, yknow, that's actually kind of a hard one. If I had to pick it'd probably be this bit from the moon in your mouth:

As you start to ease away from Grimmjow and back inside, the Hollow makes a low sound and reaches out with his other arm, grasping for you. He’s so tired that he misses the first time, before he marshals the effort to lean in and catch you by the fingers.

“Don’t go,” he murmurs, squeezing subtly until your knuckles grind together, the sensation just short of pain. In another life, it could have been a plea and your heart would have turned to pulp and made the rest of you give in along with it. In this one, it’s a faintly growled order, and the heavy half-lid of his eyes still prompts something protective in you, but you know better than to mistake the look for soft.

I tried really hard to make this like. recognizable as something so deeply human, not wanting someone who Is Important To You to leave you alone somewhere cold. but to also gently remind that this relationship isn't straightforward because they [complicated] each other, it's not quite love but it's not so mercenary as their outward attitudes suggest. I wanted to drive home the whole self-in-other aspect of grimmichi that is the really compelling point of the whole parallel to me: they are, to each other, the externalization of things buried deep inside themselves--grimmjow is still human, ichigo is on some level someone who fights because he likes to. which is why they draw to each other, because they can affirm each other and in that way affirm themselves.

just, man. hollows, huh.

#bizarre adventures #ty queenie <3

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roscgcld · 3 years

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HEADCANON + FUSHIGURO MEGUMI || relationship things

request: Can you do sfw and nsfw relationship hcs for Fushiguro

note: hello love! i wouldn’t mind doing some hcs for our little shy bean! tbh, i am not going to lie, this did not take me long to thing lmao - this is my first nsfw work on this blog tho! so this was definitely fun.

pronouns: them/they

note: aged-up!fushiguro! x reader, nsfw content below - please skip if you’re uncomfortable

other than that, enjoy~

sfw

if you two ever share a home together, i feel like he’s the kind of guy who would string fairy lights around your home because it’s cozy to him?

definitely have dog themed couple items - matching dog themed slippers, mugs, even decorative plates if you allow him to

bet you they are both modelled after his shikigami dogs - since they were the first shikigami to submit to him. so they always hold a special place in his heart

i feel like even though he trains hard, he still likes to keep his hands in good condition. so there is tubes of hand lotion scattered everywhere, at the most random of places by the way

speaking to that - you two might have manicure weekends at home; where he’d spend some time just trimming and caring for his hands and fingernails. he’d do yours if you ask him to

sometimes he’d come home dead tired and just collapses on you wordlessly - wrapping his arms around you tightly whilst burying his face into your neck

would sigh in content when you wrap your arms around him and hold him close, just running your fingers through his hair gently and tracing your fingers down the back of his neck

if you try to ask him about work, he’d either tell you everything in detail or nothing at all - there is no in between

most times it’s just him grumbling about gojo and yuji, who he’d once said they both ‘shave so many years off my life just by breathing’

when he’s away on missions, he’ll call you just so you two can go about your day. no words are needed, but he just wants to hear you go about your day. it calms him down, and reminds himself that you’re going to be there for him

weekend visits to his sister - who survived the Shibuya incident and is now recovering slowly under the care of Ieiri (this is not canon by the way - in the manga we still have no idea how things are gonna turn out for her after the whole Geto thing)

having random members of the zen’in clan coming to your shared home asking if you’d talk to them about trying to convince fushiguro to become a zen’in

if fushiguro is home at the time, he’d send his devine dog on them; listening to their terrified screams with a pleased smile as they ran away from your home

“that’s not really nice, gumi.”

“yeah, yeah - wanna go grab some bingsu?”

honey, you are set for life by the way - mans can cook a bomb ass meal. and from what we know, learns quick too. so if you want to try something new, just give him a few minutes to google and watch a tutorial on it and i bet your ass he can recreate it down to a t

feel like he gives the best massages - don’t tell me otherwise. his hands are definitely made for more then just battles

enjoys it when you would whisper sweet nothings to him after a long week of work - getting more and more cuddly the longer you shower him in praises

he’s more talkative around you compared to others, more willing to share his emotions and how he’s feeling - even though sometimes he finds it hard to find the right words

he lets you wear his clothes - shirts, sweaters, hoodies, sweats. you name it, he’d just gives it to you. finds it cute how you’re drowned in the fabric

enjoys blow drying your hair; idk, i just see him with a peaceful expression on his face, carefully blow drying your hair for you after a warm shower together

would give you actual advice on your outfit - i feel like he’s the one who helps yuji and nobara put together their outfits together whenever they go out of town

nothing is out of place in your home - there is always a compartment for it, or a space on the shelf, or in a drawer

cooking dates together - if you can’t cook, he’ll teach you. if you can cook, you two will try something new together

feel like he’s a dark chocolate fanatic - so you guys will always have a shit ton of chocolate in your home

on some days you’ll come home and just have nue stretched out over your living room, your boyfriend just watching the tv before him whilst petting the owl-like shikigami like it’s a domesticated cat

“oh, hey babe.” he’d greet with a casual nod at you whilst you stand in the hallway, blinking in confusion

idk, i feel like you two have a chilled but lowkey chaotic relationship - since he is friends with gojo, yuji and nobara. but it’s still really loving, with more physical instead of verbal shows of affection. you’ll be treated like a queen/king, and as long as megumi has it, he will make sure you know how much he loves you, even if he’s not by your side due to work

nsfw

okay, i get he’s all innocent and is dense in everything else besides jujutsu - but you have to remember this dude’s dad is fushiguro fucking togi

don’t tell me this man is kink-less - there is no fucking way

i mean yeah, when you two first get down and dirty together, i feel like he’s all awkward and unsure at first, since he didn’t want to hurt you

but i get this vibe that he knows exactly what he wants - but let’s remember he’s still a shy bean that refuses to do anything with you until he is 100% comfortable

stress sex happens often - i can bet you that this man will probably come home with a dark look on his face, push you onto the nearest flat surface and just grinds against your ass

people keep saying that he’s a boobs man - and i can see that. doubt he really gives a shit about the size, he just enjoys how he can play with your nipples and have you squirm underneath him

he enjoys tugging your hair - there is just something about wrapping your soft strands between his fingers whilst he fucks you hard; hearing your voice loud and clear

feel like he’s a doggy man; enjoys running his large hand down your back and gripping the back of your neck. how he can shove your face into the mattress whilst fucking you silly from the back

lowkey has a dumbification kink - enjoys whenever you fucked so good by him that you’re basically drooling and babbling absolute nonsense at him

enjoys leaving hickeys on places you’d never notice at first - on your back, back of your hip, small of your back, shoulder blades. he enjoys you coming up to him with a blush on your face and smacking his shoulder, whining to him that nobara and maki saw the hickeys he left all over to you

bruises on your hips are also a common thing too - he’s hands are so strong and rough that sometimes he just forgets that your skin is delicate and you can bruise easily. he’ll apologise, then add new ones on top of the old ones

enjoys choking you as well - loves to feel your racing pulse under his fingertips and how you tighten around him whenever he tightens his old around you more

dacryphilia - definitely feels a thrill go through him when you’d look up at him with tear soaked lashes and stained cheeks. makes him take you harder

doesn’t always enjoy a blowjob - idk why, i feel like he’s more into giving that receiving. goes with his dacryphilia kink too - will stay with his head between your thighs until you’re crying and shaking whilst you try to push him away

definitely enjoys pinning you down, either with his hands or with ropes and handcuffs, but he’s not interested in the entire bdsm thing

enjoys buying you lacy lingerie, regardless of what gender you are, and just have you put them on to show him; only to then rip it off of you as he pins you down on the sofa

he’s somewhat of a soft dom, he wants to protect you and always make sure you’re going to be enjoying yourself. but he’s not above using your body for his own pleasure

he’s not a loud man - a loud grunt from time to time, low groans and growls. but he’s not loud in bed. but enjoys it when you’re loud

man loves the aftercare process - cleans you up gently with a towel, making sure you’re hydrated, getting you snacks if you’re hungry, rubbing your sore muscles. he views it as intimate and cherishes those moments when you lean on him the most

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starlightsinger32 · 2 years

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My Speeding Bullet Headcanons

(These are/will be all true for The Roadrunner and the Wiley Dingo)

- Scout and Sniper are both their canon heights (5'11'' and 6'2'') I like short!Scout don't get me wrong, but I felt like making him shorter would make it too hard to justify him escaping from some of Sniper's traps

- Sniper is 29, Scout is 24, almost 25

-Sniper has been with a guy before, he spent so much time on the road as an assassin that he would take intimacy where he could

-Scout refuses to confirm or deny to me that he is a virgin, but definitely hasn't been with a guy

- Nicknames are part of their love language:

Scout's nicknames for Sniper: Snipes, wombat, dingo, babe

Sniper's nicknames for Scout: roo, roadrunner, varmit, luv, precious posey

- RED Spy is RED Scout's dad, Scout knows but just tries to block it out

-He only calls Spy 'Dad' when he is mad and wants to remind Spy (and everyone else) that he abandoned a 3 year old

- Spy hates that Sniper and Scout are together, but finds out pretty quickly that neither of them is going to give the other up despite bribes and threats, so he adopts a 'If I don't acknowledge it, it's not happening' attitude

- I've heard that Scout canonically dies at age 27-I reject that. He lives a long life with Sniper and no one can tell me otherwise

- You wouldn't think it, but Sniper is actually the cuddler in the relationship. Scout got lots of physical contact his whole life, having 7 older brothers, but Sniper barely got any, so he likes to hold Scout any chance he gets.

Scout's standing up? Sniper will come hug him from behind

Scout's on the couch? Sniper will either put his arm around him or push his legs off the couch so he can drape Scout's legs over his lap

In bed? Scout's thinner than Sniper so Sniper will completely engulf him when they cuddle, and kiss his neck or forehead depending on which way he's facing. Scout likes it too because Sniper makes him feel safe

- Scout's real name is Jeremy, and Sniper's is Mick (short for Micheal)

- Scout is big on words of affirmation, and tells Sniper how handsome, awesome, badass, etc he is basically everyday. If he thinks of something he likes about Sniper, he will tell Sniper as soon as he can. Sniper compliments him and means it every time, but not as often, especially not around the other mercs. But when they're in bed, and Scout is asleep, then he'll whisper all the sappy things he wants to say to him. Scout heard 'You're my entire world, and I don't know what I did to deserve ya' one night, and now pretends to be asleep so he can listen to Sniper basically gush about him

-Sniper's voice turns Scout on. Full Stop.

-The only time Scout is completely silent is when Sniper is talking. He will drop everything and just listen because he knows how comfortable Sniper is with him if he will share personal things and actually monologue for a couple minutes

-They became friends because Scout refused to give up on Sniper. He basically showed up at Sniper's camper one day and was like 'I'm never leaving'. (he didn't move in tho) It bothered Sniper for about a week, but Scout never forced him to talk, and just seemed happy to be with him, and that got endearing pretty quick.

- Their couple dynamic is basically bros who cuddle and hold hands, except when they compete to see who can make the other one blush more. (Scout always loses because he sucks at hiding emotions and Sniper's had a lot of practice)

-Sniper doesn't feel like he has to hide his emotions around Scout, because he won't use them against him like Medic or Spy might

-Scout is, naturally, loud in bed

- Sniper is better at dirty talk, and he always growls it into Scout's ear, which just makes Scout even louder

- They don't really have a dom/sub dynamic, but Sniper will put Scout in his place if he's being a brat

If you want more or have specific questions, use my Ask Me Anything!

#speeding bullet #tf2 scout #tf2 sniper #sniperscout

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dameronology · 3 years

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you have my number {bucky barnes x reader}

summary: bucky barnes' memory is a little selective, thanks to all the brainwashing - but one thing he'll never forget is his love for you, even if you're a complete & utter pain in the ass. his ass. (based on deja vu by olivia rodigro)

^even tho this fic refers to bucky as having a new gf, the reader is still g.n :)

this is spoiler free! enjoyyy

- jazz xx

Your relationship with Bucky Barnes had been nothing short of a train wreck.

And frankly, that was putting it nicely.

It had been a short & passionate affair; intense and sweet and filled with so much emotion in such high concentrations that you'd both almost drowned in it. For every euphoric moment, there had been one so low that you'd scraped your knees on the ground. Climbing a ladder to heaven whilst simultaneously digging your own graves had taken its toll on you both, and eventually, you had no choice but to go your separate ways. It had been for your own sanity, really.

So there he was, tucked away in a neat little box in your brain, labelled don't touch, ever. Even when you were completely wasted, surrounded by your friends and their respective lovers, you never dared to venture back down that particular memory lane. Forgetting all the bad parts and selectively remembering the good parts was easy enough to do, but you had the common sense to remember why you'd broken up in the first place. Because Bucky Barnes, despite being easy on the eyes and having a charming sense of humour, was a pain in your fucking ass. He managed to press every one of your buttons without even trying and his ability to bring out the best in you was completely and entirely wiped out by his tendency to bring out the worst. That wasn't even getting started on his emotional hold-ups; a can of worms neither of you had dared to open until it became the very reason for your demise.

Six months had passed, and you'd managed to expertly avoid him. You worked different missions and Sam Wilson, god bless his sweet soul, went the extra mile to ensure your paths never crossed in a professional sense. On a personal level, however? That was a little more difficult. New York City felt a lot smaller after your break up. You found yourself occasionally ducking under your hood when you saw him on the F-train, or rushing to cross the road when you saw him coming towards you on the street.

That was when you had the whole city to lose yourself in; streets and shops and little food carts to distract yourself with should you need to. Being confined to the same room for a work party was a different story entirely, and one you didn't want to read. Yet, thanks to some insistence from your boss and a little grovelling from your colleagues, you found yourself rocking up to the former Avengers tower on a Friday night.

"So you do exist outside of your work uniform?" Sam Wilson greeted you with a quirked eyebrow.

"Yeah, yeah - nice to see you too, Wilson."

Despite your initial attempts to elbow him in the rips, he wrestled you off of him and pulled you into a tight hug. Sam was one of your favourite colleagues and oldest friends - he'd witnessed the rise and fall of your relationship with Bucky, and been there for you both during the break-up. That had been an exhausting few days, running between your respective apartments in an attempt to offer emotional support to you both.

"D'you want some champagne?" He asked.

"I'm good, but thank-"

You froze, eyes widening at the sight of James Barnes across the room. He looked quintessentially the same, bar for the fact his hair was a little longer and he had a fresh, pink scar under his left eye. Having ditched his usual attire for a black blazer, he looked good. Annoyingly so, in fact. It made you secretly grateful that you'd chosen to dress up a little more than usual too.

"- on second thoughts." You took the flute of champagne from Sam, also grabbing a shot of vodka from the same trey. It was gone in seconds.

"Need I ask?" Sam gave you a playful frown. His brown eyes followed your gaze over his shoulder, landing on the man you'd been staring at. "Ah. I need not."

"Sorry." You murmured. "We haven't actually spoken since, y'know."

"Since you had a break-up that made Ross and Rachel look good?"

"I don't think Bucky has ever seen Friends." You quipped.

"His loss." Sam shrugged. "You should talk to him."

"Nope." You snorted. "Absolutely not. I don't even know if he's moved on."

"Judging by the pretty blonde on his arm, I think he has," Sam replied. "Would you look at that! They're headed right for us."

That was a lot of information to process at once. You would have needed a week alone for your poor, tired brain to deal with the fact that Bucky had someone else on his arm, and a further three days to big yourself up enough to talk to him. Alas, that was not the case tonight. Instead, you had about five seconds between Sam finishing his sentence and your ex-boyfriend reaching you. It was just as well you found the energy within that timeframe to down your champagne.

You could see the woman on his arm clearer now. To give credit where credit was due, she stunning. She looked like the sort of girl who smelt of strawberries and Chanel, and grew her own vegetables on the fire escape. The kind of person you swore to be with every New Year that came, but quickly ditched after a week, returning to drinking coffee from the Starbucks under your apartment rather than going to the organic, vegan place a few blocks over. There was an ethereal glow about her and fuck. You were mad.

"Sam!" Bucky called out to his friend - for a minute, you thought he was ignoring you, before you realised he genuinely didn't recognise you. Your name rolled off his tongue with a tone of uncertainty, as though he was learning a new language and still learning how to pronounce things. "Wow. You look...different."

"So do you." You shot back. "Who's your friend?"

"This is Katie." He awkwardly smiled. "My...my girlfriend."

"It's nice to meet you." You forced an equally pained grin, taking her hand in a shake.

"How do you and Bucky know each other?" She asked.

"Work." Bucky quickly said. You thinned your eyes at him, almost in disbelief.

"So you're an Avenger like these two?" Katie asked, clearly not picking up on the tension. "That's so cool."

"Not in an official capacity." You replied. "But they'd be fucked without me."

The night only got longer from there, really.

There wasn't enough champagne in the world to help the void in your soul. It was a gaping wound that Bucky Barnes had both filled and widened - and tonight, he was doing the latter. It sounded as though him and Katie were having a grand ol' time of it. From the parts of the conversation that you'd actually bothered to listen to, you'd gathered that she'd arrived in New York from London just over three months ago. That meant she had a fucking accent. Of course she did. It made everything she said a thousand times more interesting.

"We were in Paris, in this little cafe. What was it called, babe? Maison de vie?"

"Maison de l'amour, doll." Bucky corrected her. It had only sounded right when he was calling you that.

Your eyes shot up from your drink, immediately staring daggers at them both. The slimy bastard. You had been the one to show him that place. You'd been in Paris for a mission, and after realising it was your four-month anniversary, you'd taken him there for pancakes. It had been a slow morning, filled with hazy eyes and pink skies, and it had ended with him dropping the L-bomb for the first time. The photo you'd taken of Bucky, sat beside a pile of pancakes the same size of him and with whipped cream on his chin, had been your phone background until the day you broke up.

"I've been there." You didn't break away from his gaze, holding cold blue eyes in a trance that he found to be almost suffocating.

"Oh, nice!" Katie beamed. "Did you enjoy it?"

"Yeah." You sniffed. "The company was shit, though."

"Oh, man." She replied. "I'm sorry to hear that."

"It's not your fault." You gave her a sweet smile - to Bucky, it was a look of venom. "So, tell me more about your trip to Paris."

He quickly cleared his throat. "We didn't do much. Just a weekend getaway-"

"- are you forgetting that we saw Billy Joel?" Katie cut him off with a laugh. "The Billy Joel!"

"Right." It looked as though his mouth had gone completely dry.

"He told me he loved me for the first time to Uptown Girl-"

"-excuse me for a moment." You shoved your glass in her hand, before backing away from your little huddle.

Your brain was focused on getting away and only on getting away. The room suddenly felt a thousand times hotter, and a thousand times smaller too, as though the walls were closing in on you. Maybe that wouldn't have been so bad if they'd just collapsed around you and swallowed you fucking whole. Anything to get away from this situation.

Making a beeline for the balcony doors, you elbowed them open and stepped outside. The cold air of the rooftop gardens was a welcome contrast to the stuffy indoors, biting, night air hitting your face like an icy hug. The sounds of the city rung below you - sirens and yells and tourists - and tangled into the faint sound of the music, all parts of a world that your brain was working overtime to block out.

You focused on the city instead, using the bright lights of the surrounding buildings to anchor you to reality. None of it really even made sense - you were over Bucky. Had been for a long time. It was just the thought of him doing all the things that he'd done with you, with someone else. It made you feel a little bad for Katie, too.

"I was going to tell you about Billy Joel."

You glanced over your shoulder, giving a derivative snort. "Piss off, Bucky."

"I'm serious." He ignored your demand, cautiously approaching you.

"I brought you those tickets!" You turned around to face him. "We were meant to go together. Billy Joel was our thing."

"We broke up!' He reminded you. "Like I said, I was going to tell you that we went together-"

"- I don't care." You cut him off. "I genuinely don't care."

"That was a lot of storming off for someone who doesn't care."

"Okay, maybe I care a little bit." You huffed, taking a seat on a bench. "It's not even that you're with someone else, it's that you're doing all the things we did. The nicknames, the pancake place, the concert."

"I..." Bucky took a seat beside you, pondering for a moment.

"And declaring your love for someone to Uptown Girl is fucking weird." You muttered.

"Do you have a better suggestion?"

"Vienna, obviously."

"You're such a pain in the ass." Bucky replied. "But for what it's worth, I wasn't thinking of Katie in that moment."

You glanced up at him, frowning. "What do you mean?"

"D'you remember that morning when we were in New Orleans?" He asked. "And we had a few hours to kill before our flight, so you started dancing around the hotel room to Uptown Girl?"

"I remember." You softly smiled.

"That was when I realised I loved you." He admitted. "I was replaying that in my head at the concert, and it just kinda came out, and Katie heard."

"Damn." You muttered. "Sucks to be her, huh?"

"I like Katie." He said. "Truth be told, doll, I'm still stuck in the past a little bit. With you, and with what we had."

"We fucking hated each other by the end, Buck."

"I know, but I mean all the stuff before that." He explained. "You were the first person who saw me for who I am and not what I've done. The first person that actually made me feel loved and worthy."

"I do try."

He lightly elbowed you "I'm serious. I think I'm just projecting my longing for what we had onto my current relationship."

"You're being painfully honest tonight." You observed. "It's fucking weird."

"Who taught me to be painfully honest?"

"Right." You rolled your eyes. "So this is how Frankenstein felt when he created his monster."

"You're the worst," Bucky muttered. "I genuinely am sorry, though. I shouldn't be recycling our memories. I should make new ones.'

Dusting off your trousers, you stood up. "You're right."

"Thank you, though."

"For what?"

"For finding me first," He replied, "and for teaching me what love is."

"Well, if you ever need to be reminded? You have my number."

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