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#sanders sides incorrect quotes

Logan: I have a lot of books. History books, even some fantasy books. Hell, I’ll have some random books like the formation of lightning penguins-

Patton: LIGHTNING PENGUINS?! :D

Logan: Sorry, I meant books on the formation of lightning and penguins-

Patton: OMG LIGHTNING PENGUINS! They’d be so cute with their little Pikachu markings and gosh I’d want to hug some lightning penguins if they couldn’t shock me-

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Janus: *wakes up feeling like a Disney princess*

Janus: *opens the curtains, singing*

*the snakes come slithering in*

Janus: Oh my, thank you for coming!

Snakes: *help clean the house*

Janus: *leads sneks in entereage of lovely hissing*

Virgil:

Virgil: WHAT THE FUH-

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Aisha: Hey, Samantha. Has Olaf found you yet?

Janus: What are you talking ab- ooohhh.

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Aisha: Salutations, Madonna. Can you sing Papa Don’t Preach for me?

Janus: You were literally there during my name reveal-

Aisha: I don’t recall.

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Aisha: Hello, Gerard Grey. Can you please compose some commentary music?

Janus:

Janus: I give up.

3 notes

Patton: I’m having a child!

Virgil: Oh, congrats

Patton: It’s you!

Virgil: ….Oh!

Patton: Sign here!

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Remus: Here’s the thing, though. Is it still a murder if I give them a heads up?

Patton: I think that’s called a threat.

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Logan Murphy’s Law#11

-

Logan: honestly what are the odd for the lightning to strike into the lamppost we’re standing next to?

🌩️

Virgil: *sigh* You, Logan… You are the odd…

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Roman: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!

Remus, eating yet another stick of deodorant:

Janus: What isn’t wrong with him is the shorter list.

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Virgil: I accidentally almost dropped my phone onto the soft carpet, but luckily my amazing reflexes kicked in and I smacked it right into the wall

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Remus will take every single possible opportunity to carry Virgil and snuggle him, no matter how minor


Virgil: my foot is stinging a little bit


Remus:

image
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Virgil: “My phone fell down the side of the bed that’s against the wall and I had to crawl under the bed from the other side to get it. My head hit the wood base of my bed and I started sobbing slightly.”

Logan: “Are you alr-”

Virgil: “I am the monster now”

As experienced and shared by @star-crossed-shipper

27 notes

Aisha: Hey, Logan. If you don’t mind me asking, how are you so pyschically strong?

Logan: Everytime I’m ignored, I do one push up.

Aisha:

Aisha: Sweetie, is there anyone you would like me to talk to-

14 notes
Conversation
Logan
Patton... This has to stop.
Patton
B-But... Logan...
Logan
I'm sorry, but this is getting way out of hand.
Patton, standing in front of jars upon jars of soda can tabs and boxes filled with putty
I promise this is the last one!
Virgil
If it makes you feel any better... Half of my room is filled with fortunes I got from fortune cookies.
Roman
And I have entire chests filled with random rocks I pick up.
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Virgil: *texting the groupchat* If I fall asleep on this counter Im gonna be so pissed

Roman: *bursts into the room* wHAT

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First Meeting

Roman: Ah!
Roman: Welcome, dear traveler!
Virgil:
Virgil: What. The. Actual. Fuck.
Virgil: Remus.
Virgil: Why the fuck are u playing dress up.
Roman: …e-excuse me…?
Virgil: You heard me.
Roman:
Virgil: AND DID U SHAVE YOUR MUSTACHE??!!
Roman: ??MUSTACHE??

*on the other side of the kingdom*
Remus
, wiggling his mustache: Someone’s talking about me.
Janus: How do u know?
Remus: My mustache senses are tingling.
Janus:

40 notes

Sanders sides incorrect quotes part who knows anymore.

Remus: shots fired.

Virgil: I don’t fire shots, I launch them like particularly effective ballistics from a cannon.

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Remus: why would anyone want a penis enlarger?

Logan, dead pan: needs must as the devil drives.

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Janus, as the podcast plays: welcome to nightvale.

Logan: aaand we’re quoting it now, I give us three weeks before it’s all he talks about.

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Patton, holding a cat: you’re a magic cat, you won’t hurt me, you’ll win a war.

Logan: aren’t you allergic?

Patton: it’s a magic cat Logan, it can’t hurt me.

_____________________________________

Roman: I haven’t been listening to music class, I was buried in Gay podcasts.

Virgil: mood but I was relying on you for answers.

_____________________________________

Roman: Hi, I’m gay.

Patton: Hi Gay, I’m dad.

Logan: Hi dad, I’m tired of this shit.

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Roman: YOU ARE A CORRUPT BASTARD!

Janus: I’m not a politician.

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Remus: this drink is cherry Pepsi, raspberry Pepsi, Limeade, Lemonade and apple juice.

Janus, internally: 🎵dumb ways to die, so many dumb ways to die 🎵

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Logan: the only thing he managed to graduate from is Preschool, and even that’s debatable.

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Virgil: ah yes, tumblr, the only place weirder than my house.

Remus: your house needs to try harder.

18 notes