#series: make the yuletide gay
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we live in troubled days (oh, my friend, we have the strangest ways) — ch 4/6?
(5.4k || read on ao3)
(ch1 || ch2 || ch3)
He cannot do this.
It was bad enough trying to hang out with just Harrington, but Robin’s presence adds a whole new layer of weirdness.
It’s like this is a game of tri-dimensional chess, except instead of playing, he’s a rook. Or probably a pawn. Certainly not someone with a high enough vantage point to actually understand anything happening on the board.
For example:
Robin announces that they both have to watch her hang her new Rudolph ornament—dubbed Rolph—on the tree, and they dutifully follow her. While she and Harrington discuss the best location for him, Eddie takes in the tree, which is decorated with a baffling mix of perfectly matching glass ornaments and what can only be described as a middle school art room explosion. The number of painted light bulbs and cinnamon stick snowmen and paper snowflakes is truly staggering. Not at all what Eddie would’ve expected, given the rest of the decor in this atrocious house.
“There,” Robin says, finally placing the ornament on a suitable branch. “I think that’s good. You?”
“Yeah. Here, I’ll turn on the lights to make sure.” Then Harrington flips the surge strip on, and—
“Sweet! I love bubble lights,” Eddie says.
Robin replies, “Steve thought his parents’ rich person white ones were boring.”
Harrington nods, says, “But I can’t do normal colored ones because of, y’know,” makes a vague hand gesture towards the ceiling, and leaves the room.
Eddie’s subsequent attempts to communicate, What the fuck, that was weird, right? with his eyes fail spectacularly as Robin gets lost watching the bubbles.
He leaves her to stare at the lights and returns to Harrington’s side like a dog to its master’s heel. Honestly, this whole thing is starting to get pathetic. How has he failed to find any concrete evidence? He really thought he would be better at this whole investigation thing.
Should he just try to seem less nerdy so that Harrington loses interest in killing him? What do normal guys talk about? Better question: What do popular guys talk about? Big parties? But Eddie’s never been to one of those without dealing—and talking about hard drugs right now would probably start an international incident, based on the way Harrington reacted to weed.
Cars are out, since he doubts Harrington wants to hear about his van’s many and varied ailments.
Which leaves… sports? Yeah, Eddie can—probably—fudge a decent amount of Sports Knowledge, based on gym class and osmosis from the times Wayne’s watched a game in the trailer.
“Balls.” Nope! Immediate disaster! Being murdered right now would be a blessing, honestly, but Eddie rallies and says, “Uh, I mean. Basketball.”
Harrington stares at him for a moment, then says, tentatively, “…Yes?”
Eddie nods, trying to look like someone who’s voluntarily played a sport before. “You played in high school, right?”
“Yeah,” Harrington says, sounding like it’s the stupidest question he’s ever heard. Then he clears his throat and continues, less bitchily, “Well, not my senior year, since I was benched after Hargrove tried to cave my skull in with a plate, but. Before that.”
Eddie tries not to wince. Hargrove is probably a sore topic. Time to redirect. “Swimming!” he declares.
Harrington stares some more.
“You were, uh, captain, right?” What’s the least nerdy way to stand? Should he lean on something all cool and casual? Or will that make him look sickly, like his muscles aren’t strong enough to keep him upright?
“Co-captain,” Harrington corrects.
Eddie nods vaguely. “Right. Cool.”
“Cool,” Harrington echoes. He continues to watch Eddie with an unreadable expression, and Eddie desperately hopes that his nerves don’t show and he passes whatever jock visual test is happening right now. “Are you actually at all interested in sports?”
“Nope.” What the fuck! Jesus, he needs to find a brain to mouth filter.
Harrington snorts and turns back to the stove. “You don’t have to pretend to like sports for me. Just talk about your nerdy shit, or whatever.”
Yeah, he’s not doing that while trying to seem less nerdy, thank you very much. Eddie leans against the island—in a very athletic way, because you never know when your future murderer might glance over—and says, “Robin told me the kids were on their way?”
Harrington nods and calls, “Hey, Rob, did Dustin give you an ETA?”
“No, he just said—” Robin cuts herself off, and Eddie glances at the doorway to find her frowning at him. “Oh, Jesus Christ, Steve. What have you done to Eddie now?”
“What?”
“Just look at him.”
Harrington turns to look at his, again, totally normal and athletic leaning and says, “Shit, are you ok? Why are you slouching like that? Do you need painkillers or something?”
Eddie straightens up, pulling his hair in front of his face. “No, uh. Just. Stretching.”
Harrington eyes him for a moment longer—looking for weaknesses to exploit?—before turning to Robin and asking, “Hey, Rob, can you go set the table for me?”
“Ugh. Seriously? I’m a guest. I shouldn’t have to do work. You’re being a bad host.”
Harrington scoffs. “You practically live here. You don’t count as a guest anymore.”
“Why didn’t you do it while I was asleep?”
“Because I was cooking?” Harrington pointedly stirs the pot of… whatever he’s making now, then nods in Eddie’s direction. “And entertaining Eddie.”
“Oh-ho. Entertaining him, huh?” Robin leans back against the counter beside him with a wide grin. Her eyebrows wiggle around like seizing caterpillars.
Eddie has died and gone to hell; he’s sure of it.
Harrington’s cheeks flush red, and he takes a halfhearted swipe at her. “Get off my counter and make yourself useful.”
“This is cruel and unusual torture,” Robin laments, even as she opens up cabinets and starts pulling out glasses.
“I can help,” Eddie offers, not really keen on being alone in a room with Harrington after the joke Robin just made, even if Harrington hadn’t reacted badly.
“No, you’ll mess it up,” Robin says instantly, scowling at him like he’s committed some heinous crime. She grabs the stack of glasses and swans out of the room.
Before Eddie can figure out if he should be offended that she apparently thinks him incapable of setting a table, Harrington says, “She’s very particular about the place settings.” He raises his voice a bit and continues, “Which is why it’s stupid that we have this argument every single time.”
“You get extra bitchy if you don’t have regularly scheduled pointless arguments. They’re enrichment for your inner mean girl,” Robin calls back. “And I maintain that I shouldn’t have to set the table myself; you should just do it correctly.”
Harrington visibly bites back a response to that and turns to Eddie instead. “I forgot to ask earlier: Did you like the cake?”
And like an idiot who’s apparently incapable of not making every situation worse for himself, Eddie says, “I didn’t eat it.”
“Oh.” Harrington’s face falls. Fuck, fuck, fuck. How is he doing that with his eyes?
“My uncle ate it!” Eddie blurts. “Before I had a chance. Said it was delicious.”
Which is all true, technically. Sure, it leaves out the fact that Eddie had absolutely no intention of eating it himself. And it omits the near panic attack he had when he realized that Wayne had eaten it.
“Oh, um. That’s—”
“What’s the deal with that anyway?” Eddie asks, too loudly, desperate to redirect the conversation. “The whole ‘leaving a slice of cake on someone’s doorstep’ thing, I mean.”
“Oh, it’s something I read in an article about how to have a gay Christmas.”
Eddie is possessed by a demon. That’s the only explanation for why he immediately replies, “I’ll show you a gay Christmas.” God, and in a flirty tone? Was he just flirting? With King Steve? The man planning to murder him? Genuine question: What the fuck is wrong with his brain?
Harrington blinks at him for a second. His eyes darken and Eddie braces himself for a punch, but instead Harrington just sidles close, close, way too close and says, voice low, “Oh yeah?”
Eddie is saved by the bell. Or, in this case, a familiar knock immediately followed by the children throwing open the door like they own the place.
“Take your shoes off!” Harrington orders instantly, stepping out of Eddie’s space and heading for the door. Eddie trails after him like a duckling. Or a masochist.
“We know, Steve,” Dustin complains. Eddie loves the kid, but Christ, his attitude sometimes.
“If you knew, you would just do it without me having to remind you—”
“Happy birthday, Steve!” the kids all chorus over his bitching as he steps into the foyer.
Harrington sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Yeah, I’m sure that joke will just keep getting funnier every year.”
“It’s not a joke, Steve!” Dustin gasps, hand to his heart like the drama queen he is. “Why would we joke about your birthday? We’re all proud of you for managing to survive another year.”
“And forty’s a big milestone,” Mike says with a shit-eating grin.
“Haha. You can turn right around and go home, Wheeler.”
“Nancy’s long gone.”
“You have legs. I’m sure you can use them.”
“Wait,” Eddie says, before Mike has a chance to start whining, “it’s your birthday, and you still told me not to bring a present?”
“It’s not my birthday. Apparently the 26th is Saint Stephen’s Day, and someone felt the need to share that information. So now the kids think they’re being cute.”
“In my defense, I thought you picked the day on purpose,” Lucas calls from down the hall.
“Back up. You didn’t bring Steve a present, Eddie?” Dustin asks, extremely accusatory for a kid who literally ordered Eddie not to bring anything.
“You’re the one who told me not to!”
“Yeah, ‘cause Steve was all weird about it and told me to give you the message! But I didn’t think you’d actually listen. Who doesn’t bring something to a party?”
“For your information, I did bring something.”
“Oh yeah? What was it?”
Hmm. The kids must know that he’s a drug dealer, but Harrington was already weird at the thought of weed existing in the same house as them, so he probably shouldn’t bring it up. He scoffs. “None of your business, pipsqueak. It’s for adults.”
“Porn?” Dustin screeches.
“What? No!”
“Who has porn?” Robin asks, turning the corner to join the conversation at literally the worst possible moment.
“Apparently Eddie brought Steve porn for Christmas,” Max says, gleefully.
“Ewww.” Robin wrinkles her nose and eyes him suspiciously. Is he going insane, or does she linger on his hanky? He fights the urge to hide it in his pocket. “What kind?”
Eddie slashes his arms through the air. “No! Jesus Christ, I didn’t bring him porn! It was just weed.”
“Oh,” Dustin says, deflating. Then he puffs up again, like an angry rooster. “Wait, you brought Steve weed? Like, marijuana? That’s worse than not getting him a present at all! You know he’s been sober since the summer.”
Eddie stares at him. “How the fuck would I know that?”
“Because I’ve talked about it before? Do you not listen when I—”
“Wait,” Harrington cuts in, turning to Dustin with his hands on his hips, strangely severe for something that literally doesn’t matter. “You’ve talked about it?”
Robin lets out a low “oooh,” like she’s just heard a classmate be called into the principal's office.
“A passing mention!” Dustin says, holding his hands up in surrender. “I didn’t go into, like—” he covers his mouth and then continues in the loudest whisper Eddie’s ever heard “—classified details, obviously. Though the papers we signed aren’t even legally binding—”
“Maybe not for you little shitheads, but I’m over eighteen—”
“Excuse me,” the tiniest child—who Eddie is pretty sure he’s never seen before—says abruptly. “I see that Robin is eating a cookie right now, and if I don’t get one in the next thirty seconds, I’m calling CPS.”
Harrington immediately abandons his argument with Dustin and whirls on her, slamming his hands onto his hips. “You know where the kitchen is, Erica. And what the fuck would CPS do?”
Erica scoffs. “Uh, protect me? I am a child, in case you’ve forgotten.”
“You’re a pain in my ass, is what you are,” Harrington mutters, running a hand through his hair and looking extremely harried for someone who supposedly hangs out with these children regularly. “I’m not your parent? CPS can’t do shit to me.”
“Uh, CPS is part of the government,” Erica says, in that classic middle schooler How stupid can you be? voice. “And the government owes me free dessert for life.”
“Wasn’t it just ice cream?”
She rolls her eyes. “It changed to all desserts when I nearly died multiple times and had to rescue your useless ass.”
“Language, shithead,” Harrington says absently.
“Wait. Since when does the government owe you that? I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but none of us are government agents.” Robin gestures—bizarrely—between herself, Harrington, and Dustin. “And besides, the deal was null and void when Scoops burnt down.”
“The deal with you losers was void. But I negotiated a better one with the government. If they want me to keep my mouth shut, they have to give me something in exchange.”
“Shit, we could do that?” Lucas asks, walking back into the foyer and handing Erica a cookie.
She sighs. “You know, for a bunch of nerds, you’re all real stupid.”
“Hey! I just got you a cookie, and you’re calling me stupid?”
“That’s the only reason I’m not being meaner.”
“How does free dessert from the government even work?” Eddie asks. Everyone turns to stare at him, like they’d forgotten that he was also in the room for… all of whatever that was. Super cool vibe. “Do you have some sort of coupon signed by the president? Do you have to keep every receipt and report it on your taxes?”
“How should I know? I’m eleven.”
“But—”
“Damn,” Robin says loudly. “I can’t believe I didn’t realize we could extort the government. Then I could use my money from Family Video for something fun, rather than just saving it for college.”
Ok, yeah! Just talk over him; that’s fine. Also, what? Eddie’s, like, eighty-seven percent sure this has something to do with that “top secret” D&D campaign that the boys think he doesn’t know about, but why were Harrington and Robin involved? And why would Family Video be included? Maybe he was wrong about the D&D aspect. It could be some other game system, set in modern day for some lame reason and all about boring real life problems rather than cool shit like fighting monsters and—
“What?” Harrington asks, frowning. “Rob, all of us have ‘tuition funds.’”
“Since when?”
“Uh, ‘84 for most of us, and ‘85 for you and Erica?”
“That cannot be true.”
“Did you actually read any of the paperwork you signed?”
“Sorry, are you telling me that you did?”
“Obviously? I mean, sure, maybe I missed something, since I’ve gotten a concussion literally every time this shit goes down, but I wasn’t going to sign something without reading it? Especially not since the last two times were, again, legally binding for me. That’s, like, the one useful piece of advice my dad has ever given me.”
“So I have a bunch of money lying around that no one told me about? What the fuck. Where is it?”
“You don’t get access to it until you turn eighteen, so parents who don’t know about—” He gestures vaguely around at the group, points at the ceiling then the ground, and then spreads his fingers wide, palm facing out. Which Eddie interprets as The sacrifices we give to our gods, committed in my basement. Single jazz hand. Roughly translated, of course. “—don’t get suspicious.”
Robin opens her mouth, but before she can say anything, Mike loudly declares, “The minister’s cat is an awesome cat.”
“What?” Eddie asks, frowning.
“Oh!” Lucas says. “The minister’s cat is a big cat.”
Dustin heckles him as Erica jumps in with, “The minister’s cat is a cute cat.”
“What the fuck,” Eddie mutters under his breath. Is this some sort of spell? A curse they’re casting on him? Maybe all of Harrington’s victims were actually just turned into cats for… some reason. And the caskets were just buried empty or with fake bodies inside. Though why Harrington’s cult would want to turn people into cats is a mystery.
Damn, he should’ve asked when Harrington got Carmilla. Maybe she’s actually Barb. If Eddie were suddenly turned into a cat, he’d definitely bite hard enough to draw blood.
Carmilla meows, horrifyingly following the pattern. Yeah, this is definitely the casting of a curse.
“Oh good choice, Keys,” Harrington coos.
Dustin says, “The minister’s cat is an eloquent cat.”
All eyes turn on Eddie expectantly, and he takes an instinctive step back. “I don’t understand what’s happening here.”
“You gotta pick a word that starts with f,” Dustin tells him.
“Fuck.”
Harrington snorts.
Eddie crosses his arms and glowers at him. “What? He said a word starting with f.”
“You have to describe the cat. Y’know, like, fancy or something. But not fancy because I just gave you that.”
“...Why?”
Harrington’s brows raise. “Because it’s the rules of the game?”
“You’ve never played The Minister’s Cat before?” Robin asks.
“Obviously not? What the fuck is The Minister’s Cat?” Eddie flails his arms to encompass this whole situation.
“It’s a Victorian parlor game,” Robin says. “Everyone goes through the alphabet and says an adjective for their letter. If you repeat a word someone said in a previous round or take too long to pick, you’re out.”
God, the Victorian era must’ve sucked if this is what they did for fun. Eddie lets out a sigh. “Ok, sure. The minister’s cat is a ferocious cat.”
“The minister’s cat is a glamorous cat,” Robin says.
They continue through the alphabet until:
“The minister’s cat is an excellent cat,” Harrington says, scooping Carmilla into his arms.
“That doesn’t start with x,” Eddie points out helpfully.
The impact of Harrington’s bitchy look is diminished by the cat purring like a motorboat in his arms. “Oh yeah? I’d like to see you think of an adjective starting with x.”
“Hey, it wasn’t my turn. And I failed senior year twice, so—” He cuts himself off, head whipping around as Robin starts honest-to-god bawking like a chicken. He tries to stare her down, but she just gets louder. He throws his hands up. “Ok, fine! The minister’s cat is a…”
Fuck. Are there any adjectives that start with x? All he can think of is various ex- words, which obviously don’t work. The smirk slowly growing on Harrington’s face is definitely not helping the situation. “Uh…”
Harrington practically oozes smugness as he says, “Yeah, not so easy is—”
“Xenophobic!” Eddie shouts. “The minister’s cat is a xenophobic cat!”
“Woah,” Robin protests, frowning at him.
“Gosh, Eddie,” Max says, shaking her head slowly. “I can’t believe you’d make the cat a bigot.”
“It starts with x!”
“Yeah, but you could’ve just gone with xanthic,” Dustin says. Eddie turns wide, probably manic eyes on him, and Dustin raises his hands in surrender. Still, he sullenly grumbles, “Just saying.”
“Yeah, you had other choices,” Lucas pitches in, grinning. “Pretty offensive to call someone’s cat bigoted, if you ask me.”
“It’s a fake cat!” Eddie shrieks, steam probably coming out of his ears at this point.
“Alright, shitheads,” Harrington interjects. He supports Carmilla as she clambers onto his shoulder, then makes a shooing motion at the kids, herding them towards the living room. “That’s enough tormenting Munson. Scram. Go entertain yourselves until dinner’s ready.”
“We didn’t even finish the round,” Dustin protests.
“Well, I’m out, so go finish it on your own.”
Max grabs Carmilla off Harrington’s shoulder. “The minister’s cat is a zesty cat. There. Round finished.”
Dustin huffs. “You’re all just being sore losers, ‘cause you know I’d win.”
Max rolls her eyes. “Sure, whatever you need to tell yourself.”
“Hey, Steve,” Mike says, “can I switch your depressing old music?”
Harrington frowns. “It’s not depressing—”
“I love you, but this song is literally named In the Bleak Midwinter,” Robin says, patting his shoulder.
“Whatever.” Harrington rolls his eyes and turns back to Mike. “You’ll have to ask Eddie. I said he could be in charge of music when he arrived, since he wasn’t happy with my choices.”
“You opened the door, and Last Christmas was playing. Wham! makes my ears bleed. Sorry for wanting to spare you that sight.” Eddie doesn’t even realize his mistake until Harrington turns on him, brows raised and a wide grin on his face.
“You recognized a Wham! song?” he asks, leaning closer.
Eddie takes a step back and crosses his arms over his chest. “The radio’s played it constantly for the past two years. Obviously I’ve heard it. Against my will.”
He vaguely registers Mike saying his name, but he’s more focused on the way Harrington still looks way too excited about Eddie’s slip.
“Obviously,” Harrington agrees, taking a step forward. “But you—”
“Everyone shut the fuck up!” Mike hollers.
“Christ,” Harrington breathes, just loud enough for Eddie to hear. He pinches the bridge of his nose.
“El recommended this album because she likes the song about the bear, so everyone is going to listen to it and enjoy it,” he says, holding up a cassette.
“Or else,” Max adds, glaring directly at Eddie for some reason.
“El has never done anything wrong in her life—” Robin starts.
“And her taste is impeccable,” Harrington cuts in.
Robin nods. “So I’m sure we’ll all love it.”
The other kids chorus their agreement, which seems to mollify Mike somewhat. He still shoots everyone a dirty look as he starts the album, though.
Eddie waits until he’s sure the kids aren’t paying attention, then follows Harrington back into the kitchen. He keeps his voice low as he asks, “El? Mike’s California girlfriend? She’s real?”
“Yep.” Harrington glances over at him, lips quirking up. “Don’t tell me you thought Suzie was fake, too.”
“Dustin’s super genius girlfriend who he met at summer camp and lives in Utah?”
“Don’t forget that she’s hotter than Phoebe Cates.”
“Of course. Super genius and hotter than Phoebe Cates. Yeah, I definitely believed in her,” Eddie says, not very convincingly.
Harrington snorts. “Well, she’s real, too. I’ve talked to her a couple times. You should see the radio Dustin built with her. Kid calls it Cerebro.”
“Like from the comics?”
Harrington stares at him blankly. “Sure.”
“You know, Professor X, Charles Xavier—”
“Oh!” Harrington snaps his finger and grins. Then he raises his voice a bit and calls, “Hey, Dustin, Cerebro’s from the G.I. Joe comics, right?”
“You know it’s not, Steve!” Dustin howls.
Harrington’s grin grows even wider. “Hey, don’t blame me. I’m just repeating Eddie’s question.”
“Oh, you motherfucker,” Eddie hisses, mere seconds before Dustin appears in the doorway, tragic and waif-like.
“You don’t know about the X-Men?” he asks, lip full-on trembling, as if Eddie not knowing something nerdy is genuinely the worst thing that could ever happen to him. If the kid is a secret agent planning his brutal murder, he’s a remarkably good actor.
“No, obviously I know the X-Men. Harrington’s just messing with you.” He whips his head around to glare venomously at Harrington, expecting him to fold like his players always do in the face of his fury.
Harrington makes the most exaggerated Who, me? face Eddie’s ever seen, and Dustin infuriatingly falls for it. Unbelievable. The kid’s literally in a club that got its name from the Uncanny X-Men.
“We have to fix this. Right now,” he announces, attaching himself to Eddie’s arm like a limpet. “So, the first X-Men comic was published in—” Aaaand he’s off, monologuing at breakneck speed with, frankly, encyclopedic knowledge of the X-Men comics, as he drags Eddie from the room.
Eddie twists around and mouths, Screw you, at Harrington, who just grins and wiggles his fingers in a little wave.
————
Eddie finally manages to escape Dustin’s clutches and creeps out of the room. He bites back a curse as he nearly bumps into a cabinet right outside the door. Who the hell has a display of fancy plates right next to a doorway? That’s just asking for a disaster.
Eddie eyes the bowl of fruit on top of the cabinet warily.
It was definitely a mistake not to eat before coming, but he’d been so worked up, he probably wouldn’t have been able to keep anything down anyway. Is it safer to wait and eat the dinner that Harrington serves him? Or should he eat an apple and hope it tides him over (and that no one asks why he isn’t eating)? Harrington wouldn’t have poisoned fruit in a bowl that anyone could eat from, right? Besides, how would he even poison an apple? He’s not a witch (probably).
Eddie plucks an apple from the bowl, inspecting it carefully. There aren’t any blemishes, nothing that makes him think it was somehow tampered with.
Though if Harrington did manage to poison them without leaving any evidence, would it be all of them? Or just the top ones? Or—realizing that Eddie would obviously be suspicious of him—just the bottom ones?
Jesus H. Christ, he sounds like Vizzini. He should just eat it.
Before he can rethink his decision, Eddie closes his eyes and sinks his teeth into it. Now he just has to figure out how—
Jesus H. Christ, what the fuck is wrong with this apple?
How the hell is it so dry? And waxy? And— Wait.
Eddie freezes, eyes slowly falling to the apple in his hand with a sinking feeling in his gut. Yeah, that’s definitely not a real apple.
He spits the lump of wax into his palm with a grimace. There’s no salvaging it, so he moves a few of the other apples out of the way and buries the evidence of his terrible choices. He carefully returns the other apples to the bowl, making sure that everything looks the same as before—thank God all the apples were the same color—and nods to himself. There. Now no one will ever know what happened here.
Honestly though, this is Harrington’s fault. Like, who actually owns wax fruit? Between this and the Victorian game, it’s like Eddie’s been transported back in time.
Oh, shit, is Harrington a vampire? Actually… Eddie honestly wouldn’t be that mad if he gets eaten by a vampire. That’d be a cool way to go. Cooler if Harrington didn't kill him and just kept him around for smaller periodic feedings, rather than a giant annual meal. That way, he could tell the boys. And there’s always tension between a vampire and their blood donor, so maybe—
“Smooth.”
Eddie yelps, whirling around to find Erica standing in the doorway. “Jesus Christ, how long have you been standing there?”
“Since you first picked up that apple.”
Well fuck. So much for nobody knowing.
“I bit it on purpose,” he tries. “I… eat wax sometimes?”
“Uh huh. If you like eating wax, why’d you spit it out instead of swallowing?”
Eddie will not make inappropriate jokes in front of a child. He won’t. He has a modicum of self control. “Ok, fine,” he says instead, shoulders slumping. “You caught me. What do you want? I should warn you that I’ve got, like, twenty cents to my name.”
“I don’t want your money,” Erica scoffs. “I have Steve for that.”
“So we’re good? You won’t tell anyone?” Eddie asks, cautiously hopeful. That seems too good to be true.
“I didn’t say that.” Her lips curl in an impish smile. This whole house is filled with demons.
“Are you going to tell me what you want, or—?”
“Dustin!” she says, glancing over her shoulder. “Come here.”
Eddie bites back a scream.
“I’m a better DM than you,” Erica tells him, apropos of nothing.
Eddie blinks at her, entirely at a loss for how to respond because, like, he shouldn’t fight a child, right? Especially not one who’s blackmailing him. Even if she is unequivocally wrong. “Uh…”
“Just the facts,” she says, punctuating the statement with a loud pop of her gum. Jesus, is this toddler cooler than him? Granted, it’s not a high bar to clear and there are probably lots of children who are objectively cooler than him, but he’s never had to interact with them before. “Just ask Dustin. He said so himself.”
Now hold on. Eddie can’t in good conscience fight a middle schooler, but freshmen are absolutely fair game. He glares at Dustin the second he steps into the room and drops his voice to his patented villain growl, “You said Erica is a better DM than me?”
“That is not what I said!” Dustin cries, holding his hands up defensively. “She’s totally misrepresenting the situation!”
“No, I remember you saying that, too,” Max calls from the other room.
“No you didn’t because I never said that!” Dustin shouts back. “I was just talking about Scoops Troop and the Party. Nothing at all to do with Hellfire.” He turns back to Eddie with wide eyes, hands clasped in front of him. “You have to believe me.”
Eddie briefly entertains the idea of making him grovel more, but he’d rather figure out what Erica’s plotting. He points to the door. “Get out of my sight.”
Dustin opens his mouth, then seems to think better of it and scampers away.
Eddie turns back to Erica, raising a brow. “What exactly was the point of that?”
“Admit that I’m a better DM than you.”
“No,” he says immediately.
“I guess Steve will just have to hear what happened in here, then.”
“There must be something else. I’ll do whatever you want. Anything but that.”
Erica’s eyes light up. “You’re my personal servant for the night.”
“Fi—”
“And,” she says, holding up a finger, “you’re going to stop being shitty to Lucas because he likes basketball.”
Eddie splutters. He hasn’t been shitty. That’s absurd. What, she thinks that just because he doesn’t like sports or jocks that means— Oh. Hmm.
“Deal,” he sighs.
“I knew you’d make the smart choice.” She holds out her cup. “Now go get me more juice.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Eddie catches the tail end of Robin’s sentence as he walks to the kitchen, her voice shrill: “—gross. Dingus, I am begging you to pick literally any other topic of conversation now.”
He presses his back to the wall right outside the kitchen, waiting to see if they’re talking about something incriminating.
“Fine,” Harrington grumbles. “So, how’re things going with—?”
“I’ve actually changed my mind. No more talking at all. I’m gonna stick my head inside the oven instead.”
“Oh, come on. Rob—” Whatever he says next is too low for Eddie to hear, but he catches Robin’s reluctant sigh, and then Harrington saying, “—and I mean, aside from certain unmentionable events, I’ve never really dabbled in anything like S&M, so—”
“I really don’t think torture counts, since it wasn't consensual or sexual... It wasn’t sexual, was it? Steve, you would’ve told me if—”
What the fuck? Harrington tortures people? God, Eddie thought that at least his murder would be quick.
“Jesus, Robin, obviously I—”
“Hey, nerd!” Erica snaps, drowning out Harrington’s voice. “You said you were going to get me more juice!”
Eddie bites back a rude comment because he did agree to be her servant, even if it’s inconvenient when he’s trying to eavesdrop. “Right away, Lady Erica.”
He steps into the kitchen. Harrington and Robin’s heads snap towards him in eerie unison. He offers them a weak smile, hoping that his face isn’t screaming the word torture, and holds Erica’s cup aloft.
“I’m on a perilous and harrowing quest.”
“That so?” Harrington asks, a grin tugging at his lips. “What is it?”
“I have to obtain more juice for Lady Erica.”
Harrington laughs and pulls the bottle out of the fridge, sliding it across the counter to him. Eddie almost doesn’t catch it—because he has bad coordination, not because he was distracted or anything. He’s not sure if Harrington noticed the fumble, but he doesn’t look up to check. He just has to pour a glass of juice without making a fool of himself. Easy-peasy.
“How’d you get roped into getting it for her?”
“Just following the code of chivalry,” Eddie says. He caps the bottle and slides it back—well, slides it part way across the counter. Good enough.
Harrington grabs the bottle and puts it back in the fridge. “Well dinner’s ready, so you can take it into the dining room. Robin can show you where Erica’s sitting.”
Great. Dinner.
This is going to be a disaster.
#steddie fic#stranger things fic#steddie#eddie munson#steve harrington#robin buckley#stranger things fanfiction#platonic stobin#the party#series: make the yuletide gay#my fic#my writing#my post#st fic#wip#my wips#not tagging the children individually but they Sure Are Here
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Make the Yuletide Gay is updated just not in time for Christmas. LOL
Merry Christmas, either belated or well in advance, YOU get to choose.
Chapter five is up and features the Christmas Ball. Somone cries, there's salt, a polar bear and Kim is still a Princess.
This is still a comedy, you should probably read Wilderness Camp first and it's pretty silly.
#kinnporsche fic#kinnporsche the series#fanfic#ao3 fanfic#make the yuletide gay#this is an attempt at humour#do not take this seriously#at all#kinn/porsche#tae/chan#tay/chan#kim/chay#vegas/pete#everyone else
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Don We Now Our Gay Apparel
Well, what with gay Santa Clauses coming out of the closet, at least in Quebec (see page 5), we decided such a momentous occasion deserved some sort of special attention. Michael Rock lensed a series of titillating shots with a satirical variation on this theme for his provocative line of greeting cards, Rockshots. Here and in our other Christmas photos, Kris Kringle definitely has his hands full of something other than toys as he comes bearing bare gifts for the Yuletide. There is unquestionably something hot about to happen, and it has absolutely nothing to do with chestnuts roasting on an open fire. There's even a touch of something for you leathermen, specificially Claus' sensual black gloves. This something for almost everyone extends to Santa's humpy helper who is quite skilled when it comes to hanging balls… on Christmas trees. Or would you prefer he assist you in making certain the proper things are well hung…meaning stockings, of course. Enough puns for now. Just remember that Christmas is a time for international brotherhood and loving your fellow man. We want you to remember this holiday season and give you a final reminder with the ensuing photograph which we couldn't resist entitling "Sandy Claus."
Mandate, January 1980
photographed by Michael Rock for Rockshots
#Mandate#Michael Rock#Rockshots#Don We Now Our Gay Apparel#vintage gay#ours#by michi#gayedit#holesrus#🍑
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Five Ten Under 500
There have been a bunch of open tags on this one but @three-drink-amy tagged me directly so here goes. To start I have to say it's wild to me, as someone coming from small or quiet fandoms, and who joined the RWRB community well before the movie, that netting under 500 kudos is now considered a lower number in this fandom. A couple of years ago it meant a lot to me to hit 500 kudos for the first time on a fic. Anyway.
I've loved seeing everyone's lists (so many new fics added to my tbr!), but they've also reminded me that there is a definite recency bias, especially among fics that didn't already have a good number of kudos. So, all of my choices are fics that were released before the movie came out. Even with that, I couldn't stick with only five, so you get five more under the cut (and I still had to leave out a lot of fics I loved, including others from the same authors listed here).
Culper Ring, 1778–1783 by @historicallysam
This is a series of 10 vignettes set during the American revolution and not one of these fics has over 100 kudos, which is a crime. So well-written and researched, and full of intrigue and feelings, I will always champion this series of fics.
Why Do We Even HAVE That Curse? by @cricketnationrise
The Mummy AU. Who doesn't love The Mummy?? I might be biased because I betaed this one but if you love action and adventure and romance, you must read this!
The Way You Seemed by @orchidscript
1950s High School AU—think Grease but gayer. I think this might be one of the first Cora fics I read, and it bowled me over. The vibes, the romance, the historical accuracy, it's so so excellent.
Red, White, & Royal Ballet by @tintagel-or-cockleshells
Ballet AU. Everything you want out of an enemies/rivals to lovers arc, and so much excellent ballet. Includes videos!
Love and Hate at the Farmers' Market by @myheartalivewrites
Farmers market vendors AU. This is soooooo adorable and about to be very seasonable! Never get tired of Alex being mad about Henry's very existence.
El Chico Del Apartamento 512 by @14carrotghoul
A cute little enemies-to-lovers neighbors AU and an absolute riot!
Soli by @cheesecurdsgravyandfries
Orchestra AU! As an oboist, Henry as principle oboe owns my entire heart. This is so sweet and lovely!
make the yuletide gay by @dumbpeachjuice
The concept behind this one is absolutely unhinged, but it's just as hilarious as you would expect from our dear peaches. Put it on your list for reading this holiday season!
a pillar i am, upright by inmoonlightigetseasick
Surprise surprise, another historical AU. Medieval knight/prince, together at the front of war. Really wonderful development of their relationship and truly excellent vibes.
and if you'll forgive me the self-promotion...
The Spirit of Giving by yours truly
Also for the holidays, a neighbors AU that leans heavily on the food as a metaphor for love trope.
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Make the Yuletide Gay!
Hey, everyone! This year, I wanted to challenge myself and post one (or more) fics per day leading up to Christmas in my first 12 Days of Zosan Christmas Special! I have fallen in love with these idiots and also the lovely community who has been nothing but kind and welcoming to a newbie 💚💛 So this is my way to give gifts to all you wonderful people!
All the fics will be posted to my new AO3 account of the same name — asliceofzosan. Which is why you are seeing some repeat fics from tumblr here mainly the Dirty Rice Ball series. Other than those three, I will be posting 12 new fics from brainrot sessions that consumed my waking thoughts every night.
And as a super special treat, the lovely, gorgeous, and MOST talented @inoreuct and I are collaborating on a fic together for one of the days! You genuinely do NOT want to miss that.
(written schedule below the cut)
Schedule
December 14 - The Rice Ball Incident
Part One of the Dirty Rice Ball Series now cross posted to AO3 with an extra scene that is not on the original tumblr post!
December 15 - Debt and Doing Dishes
Part Two of the Dirty Rice Ball Series cross posted to AO3 + A surprise fic
December 16
Part Three of the Dirty Rice Ball Series cross posted to AO3 + Another surprise fic
December 17 - By any other name
Being labeled as "Roronoa Sanji" on the newest Wanted Posters doesn't bother Sanji as much as the rest of the crew thought it would.
December 18 - 2 left feet (2 hearts beat)
Espionage, fake wedding rings, and a vintage well-fitting tux is all it takes for this night to either be labeled a complete disaster or the greatest miracle to ever happen.
December 19 - if i loved you (like i'm capable of)
After his heart was broken by a man he thought loved him, Sanji finds out that he is loved by someone he is not worthy of.
December 20 - promises, promises
Even as the golden band around his finger symbolizes their eternal love, not seeing a third earring on Zoro doesn't feel right. Sanji's anniversary gift changes that.
December 21 - a royal disaster
Nobody told Zoro that the supposedly tyrannical prince to inherit the doomed kingdom is actually the most beautiful man he will ever meet in his lifetime.
December 22 - rough hands, soft heart
Sanji thought Zoro wasn't good with kids. It wasn't until Chopper joined the crew where he realized he was sorely mistaken.
December 23 - in another world, i'm yours
Sanji switches places with a man who plays him in a TV show about his crew. He discovers many things about himself and his relationship with a certain mosshead in the process. (Collab with inoreuct)
December 24 - when you dream
There's something about the way Sanji gushes about his near impossible dream that makes Zoro root for him. And maybe unknowingly fall in love in the process.
December 25 - becoming a decent best man for dumbasses
Nami asks Zoro to be her best man at her and Vivi's wedding. Zoro's problems cover so much more than just coming up with the best speech...
Teasers will be posted leading up to December 14! The two extra fics on day two and three will be a surprise instead 👀 Feel free to send asks about any of these stories as well 😚
Super excited to post all of these, ya'll have NO idea!! Hopefully, I'm able to reach my goals while also making the zosan community happy 💚💛
#one piece#zosan#roronoa zoro#sanji#vinsmoke sanji#niki's log: 12 days of zosan christmas#roronoa zoro x vinsmoke sanji#one piece fanfiction#are any of these fics besides the rice ball series finished?#no <3#but thats what makes this fun HAHAHHAHA#edited with a link to my ao3 account !
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The Holiday Treatment by Elle Spencer
By day, Holly Hudson’s a story editor for Wifetime Network. By night, she’s the writer for the network’s very cheesy, very straight holiday romance series―Christmas in Evermore. Holly took the job to accomplish exactly one thing: a gay Christmas movie. She’s been shot down before, but things start to look up when Meredith Drake unexpectedly moves into the network’s holiday division.
On the heels of a brief (but totally hot) fling, Holly and Meredith agree to keep things professional now that they’ll be working together. Especially since the network has a strict policy about workplace relationships. Instead, they vow to channel their passion into a pitch for the network’s first Christmas movie to feature two female leads.
In this contemporary romance, Holly and Meredith work to make the Yuletide gayer while discovering that happy endings aren’t only for the movies.
Genres: contemporary, romance
Order from Blackwell's here and get free worldwide shipping!
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1, 6, 13 and 17 pls <3
Thank you so much for the ask!
Please, people, send more. My answers will be a little slow, because I don't have a good system, but I'll get to them eventually.
1. favorite fanfic of all time
I will be unoriginal and say Everybody Loves You Now by @im-a-king-baby. It's just amazing. But Language of roses by despassurlaneige and That's how you make history, baby by waybeforeyourtime are close behind, I guess.
6. favorite one-shot fanfic
There is no doubt about this one. It's The Upgrade by @groenendaelfic . (It's 12k, though. Does it really count? Yes, it does!)
13. christmas fic recommandation
Oooh! I like this! I was thinking of making a list, actually, but didn't have the energy yet. But here you get it kind of from the top of my head (not rated)
1. not if it's you by @prince-simon
Nanny!Simon AU and Christmas kid fic that is totally cute, but stays just at the right side. (Kids are people, which means they are annoying and needy and have bad days, just like you and me, and I can't with the fics where they are always behaving and always cute. Sorry, a me issue!)
2. merry crisis by pysanky
Part of the third year things series, which I adore. Not a very merry one, but who says Christmas is always merry? Simon and Wilhelm are totally happy spending their time together. Why do they have to spend Christmas with their respective families?
3. 'Tis the Damn Season by littelbluefish
Seriously super cute getting back together fic, set during Christmas. Aged-up characters, and some really great original characters, that we unfortunately don't see enough of.
4. Make the yuletide gay by @cloudywilmon
A Christmas fake dating fic for you, my loves! Wille is convinced to help Sara out by pretending to be her boyfriend over Christmas. A splendid idea until he meets Sara's brother, Simon.
5. Almost Is Never Enough by This_time_its_just_me
Ok, this is not a Christmas fic. But there is this super cute, very fluffy Christmas celebration part that I just love, between all the angst and pining etc.
17. the most reread fic of your year
I have no idea actually. Sometimes I read other people' rec lists, and I'm reminded of a fic that I haven't read for a long time, but really loved. Or I wake up at 4 o'clock and can't fall asleep, and I start thinking about something from a fic I read, and get the urge to go find it again. That's what happened last night with this one: You Have Reached the Voicemail Box of... by @zee-has-commitment-issues. I don't really keep track of how many times I read fics, even though I reread fics regularly. Sorry 🤷
Adding these, as well, to promote some less known writers and fics:
the last writer you suscribed to on AO3 ? NenasMom
the last work you suscribed to ? I think that was Where Have You Been All These Minutes? by NenasMom ☝️, I love it so far!
your last bookmark ? 'Tis the Damn Season by littelbluefish (the Christmas fic I recommended)
#young royals#young royals fanfiction#young royals fanfic#ao3 fanfic#fic rec list#ask list#yr fic rec
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cloudymiIk fanfic masterpost
Guide
Status
☑ complete
❒ in progress
☒ hiatus
Rating
Ⓔ Explicit
Ⓣ Teen
Ⓝ Not Rated
Young Royals
stand alone oneshots and multichaptered
get it off your chest, get it off my desk Ⓔ ☑
wc: 6,877
Vincent hasn’t called him to stand since the time with Felice, although there have been multiple nights where Simon has slept over. He supposes that while one can assume, it’s not actually evident that he and Simon had sex during those times (even though they definitely have). There was no mistaking the way they’d left early the night before, however. No mistaking the darkened bruise on Wille’s neck. They’ve already received some smirks from the boys around them, cheekily asking them if they’d had a goodnight.
i find myself running home to your sweet nothings Ⓣ ☑
wc: 2,196
He’d always known Simon was beautiful, to him, it was a universal constant. But now, getting to see him in person, looking up at Wille so openly - eagerly - he was radiant.
-
Following Wille's speech, he and Simon finally get some time alone together. Post S2 E6.
bloom where you are planted Ⓣ ☑
wc: 12,915
Wille is a plant boy, Simon has a black thumb. They both run semi-popular Instas.
make the yuletide gay Ⓣ☑
chapters 5/5
wc: 34,947
Wille doesn’t have anywhere to go for the holidays, Sara wants her family to stop asking if she has a boyfriend. Fake dating over Christmas seems like the perfect solution - at least until Wille meets Sara’s brother.
series
darling, you're the one I want
1/2 - i hate accidents except when we went from friends to this Ⓔ ☑
chapters 8/8
wc: 59,633
Simon is Wilhelm's best friend, so when he confesses that he's insecure about his lack of experience Wille offers to help him. After all, it's what any good friend would do, isn't it?
2/2 - i want you (bless my soul) Ⓔ ☑
wc: 15,539
Wille and Simon decide to take another step in their relationship - but first, Wille needs to do some research (off the school wifi this time).
In your heart I see the start of every night and every day
1/2 - You're Simply the Best Ⓔ ☑
chapters 27/27
wc: 123,730
“So if you’re not staying there, and you’re not coming here…” Erik began, pausing for Willie to answer and giving another laugh when Wille didn’t fill in the blanks. “Pray tell Wilhelm, where exactly is my little brother spending the weekend? I thought your crush went to Hillerska?”
or
Erik Lives
2/2 - i'm stuck on your heart Ⓝ ☑
wc: 8,788
moments from 'you're simply the best' from other perspectives
✨ Prince Simon Cinematic Universe ✨
Tell me what you need (You look so free) Ⓔ ❒
chapters 2/10
wc: 39,102
He let himself imagine for a moment that they could be friends - maybe in another life, another universe. The whole point of his attendance at the conference, however, was to portray the image that his mother wanted him to. He brushed the fantasies aside, it was a big enough event, he should be able to get away with avoiding Prince Simon. He had to.
-
Fresh off his breakup with Nils and the release of the tape, Wille is determined to be the model prince, to play the role that's expected of him. Simon might throw a wrench in that plan.
unholy trinity Ⓣ - with @prince-simon
chapters 4/4
wc: 6,443
Prince Simon consults his best friends for advice on his feelings for the little prince of Sweden.
tryna play it cool (i could be your crush) Ⓔ ☑
wc: 8,545
Wilma is very into Rosh and kind of wants to kiss her. She has a mild crisis about it.
london calling Ⓣ ☑ - with @angelbabysimon
wc: 3,130
When Simon and Wilhelm head to London for their first anniversary, things don't go quite the way they expect...
it takes a fool (but we both are so its okay)
I Lied Ⓣ ☑
wc: 2,685
Between Christmas and New Years, Simon's friends tell him to check instagram.
New Years Resolutions Ⓣ ☑
chapters 3/3
wc: 6, 521
Sara drags Simon out to a New Years party with Felice to stop him from sitting around and pining over Wilhelm who is still stuck at the palace dealing from the fallout.
It gets worse before it gets better Ⓣ☒
chapters 9/?
wc: 24,739
Simon and Wilhelm are back at Hillerska before the term starts, but they still have to deal with the fallout of the tape.
Red, White, & Royal Blue
YourMusicSucksAndYouLookLikeADickhead Ⓔ ☑
wc: 6,762
In which Alex gets a new neighbour who immediately pisses him off, and they begin blaring their music to communicate with eachother.
- aka
Alex and Henry get off on the wrong foot, Alex has his bisexual awakening, and Nora deals with Alex's bullshit.
Healthy Choices: Relationships, Sexuality and Family Planning Ⓣ❒
chapters 1/3
wc: 10,420
Alex's high school decides to take a slightly more hands on approach to sex ed, and he finds himself stuck partnered with Henry. And their fake baby.
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Hey there everybody,
So look I was going to do a small version of kinktober but when I looked at the calendar it was the 29th and I had nothing written so I was like let me put something together for All Hallow’s Eve and umm you see that was 2 days ago and it didn’t happen. So as I was writing I was like I know if I do kinkvember it’s going to end up the same way so why don’t I do from now until New Years and call it something. So I now invite you you select an option below to name the series though I am partial to one already and help me out would ya? The first one is going up tonight no matter what I just need to edit and add tags to it. Also send in some characters and or suggestions relating to the holidays/fall or winter season.
✌🏾❤️🧤
#gay#this is my world now not your world#more to come#queenmayor23#teen wolf#derek hale#gender neutral reader#gn reader#supernatural x male reader#dean winchester#the originals#klaus mikaelson#all american#spencer james#dc tv#dc comics#marvel#clint barton x male reader#on my block#spooky diaz x reader#black gay#urban gay#x gn reader#x male reader#gender neutral#x gn y/n#x reader#sterek#marvel mcu
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we live in troubled days (oh, my friend, we have the strangest ways) — ch 3/6?
(4k || read on ao3)
(ch1 || ch2 || ch4)
“Ahoy,” Eddie says upon his return to the kitchen, compelled to keep pushing this button until it kills him. This is why he prefers to be the DM instead of a player.
Harrington just sighs and asks, “Everyone good?”
“Who?”
“Your bandmates? Are they good?”
Eddie freezes. Is this a trick question? Was Harrington eavesdropping on his phone call? No, he’s probably just trying to pretend to be a normal, friendly person who doesn’t kill people every year. Eddie forces his shoulders to relax and lets out a high pitched, awkward chuckle.
Harrington stares at him, eyebrows steadily climbing. Fuck. Right. He asked Eddie a question, didn’t he? Those usually require answers.
“Uh, kinda?”
Harrington’s eyebrows furrow, which is fair, because what the hell does that mean?
“I mean, I didn’t get through to everyone,” Eddie says, finally remembering how to string words into coherent sentences, thank god. He shrugs a little. “I’ll have to make some more calls later. If you don’t mind.”
Harrington waves a hand, turning back to the counter. “Yeah, no worries.”
Great. Time for another awkward silence.
He should’ve spent more time investigating Harrington’s room, done more than a cursory search of his desk. He’d been worried about spending a suspicious amount of time upstairs, but if he’d known that this was the alternative—
Eddie jumps a good foot in the air when someone behind him mumbles, “Cookies?”
He whirls around to find Robin Buckley standing right behind him, in a Hawkins High swim team hoodie and reindeer-patterned pajama pants, hair mussed, blinking at him with bleary confusion. “Jesus Christ,” he gasps, clutching at his racing heart. “Where the fuck did you come from?”
“I’ve always been here?” Robin says, frowning. Which is an extremely unsettling sentence.
“She took a nap after her shift this morning, so she’s been conked out upstairs for the last few hours,” Harrington explains, reaching out to grab her hand. She lets herself be reeled in, tucking herself into his side and accepting a mug of coffee with a pleased hum.
“Oh.” Eddie jams a hand into his back pocket, crossing his fingers. “I didn’t wake you up with my phone call, did I?”
Robin obnoxiously slurps her coffee, eyeing him with what Eddie feels like is an unwarranted amount of suspicion, given the fact that he was invited to this dinner.
“Don’t worry; she sleeps like the dead.”
“Except the nightmares,” Robin mutters.
Harrington rolls his eyes. “Well, yeah, obviously, but it’s pretty clear when you have those, ‘cause you wake up screaming.”
Jesus Christ. Was she a witness or (unwilling?) accomplice to Harrington’s summer rampage?
Wait, has Eddie been thinking about this all wrong? Is it possible that he managed to earn himself the freshmen’s seal of approval, and now he’s going to be inducted into the cult by participating in Robin’s murder?
No, she doesn’t fit the pattern (which does exist; fuck you, Gareth). She may be weird and nerdy in her own way, but everyone knows that she and Harrington are connected; the whole school was abuzz with gossip when the fallen king dropped her off on the first day. The most believable rumor Eddie’s heard is that Buckley is a succubus who learned how to control her powers over the summer and now has Harrington under her thrall. (Ok, yes, he was the one to suggest that, and no one else is talking about it. But the girls who’d “overheard” him had only rolled their eyes and not even bothered to call him a freak, so who knows. It might just be getting off to a slow start.)
There isn’t as much gossip circulating about them these days, but pretty much everyone who doesn’t live under a rock knows that they’re an item or whatever. Way harder to buck suspicion if everyone knows that you’re the victim’s best friend slash coworker slash boyfriend.
Eddie squashes the tiny spark of hope—not that he wants Robin to die; he’d just really rather not be murdered himself. Plus, it’d be easier to rescue someone else from being sacrificed, especially if he’s expected to participate and therefore has a knife; he doesn’t really think he’s athletic enough to save himself when he’s strapped down to an altar.
Harrington steals her mug to take a sip, then says, “Robin always wakes up on the second to last tray of cookies.”
“That’s how long it takes the smell to fill your stupidly big house. Also, I notice that you’ve failed to provide me with said cookies.” She holds her hand up expectantly.
Harrington rolls his eyes but dutifully reaches past her to grab a cookie and move it the whole five inches from the cooling rack to her hand. God, straight people are insane, Harrington especially.
Eddie heaves himself back up onto the island, and Robin perks up and asks, “Ooh, are we sitting on Steve’s counters today?”
“No,” Harrington says.
“Yes,” Eddie retorts, swinging his legs.
Robin grins at him and hops up beside him, fully ignoring Harrington’s aggrieved sigh.
“Fuck, there’s two of you now,” he grumbles. He glares at them for a second then inexplicably hands Eddie a glass.
Eddie accepts it cautiously, squinting at the contents. It looks like perfectly normal water, but honestly, who knows? There could be some sort of poison in there. Cyanide is water soluble.
“I’m the best thing that’s ever happened to you,” Robin declares, “so there’d be no reason to complain if there were two of me.”
Harrington smirks at her. “Wanna try repeating that in front of Dustin?”
Eddie sniffs his glass surreptitiously. He doesn’t smell almonds, but with his luck, he probably doesn’t have the gene that allows you to smell cyanide, so he’d have no idea it was there until it was too late. The safest option is to not drink it. After all, it’s way easier to poison a person with a glass of water handed to them than with a batch of cookies that anyone might eat.
“Uh, no. I value my hearing, thanks.” She rolls her eyes, then tilts her head, looking towards the counter. “Hey, why’s your murder knife out?”
Ha! Eddie hasn’t been overreacting; that insane cleaver is a murder weapon. …Oh no, it’s a murder weapon. Should he be running now? No, he still needs evidence. Which means finding a way to get back into Harrington’s room and actually snooping around, rather than getting caught up in giving Gareth an extremely important status update.
“Eddie asked to see my favorite knife.”
Robin furrows her brow, glancing from Harrington to Eddie and back again. “Steve.”
“What?” Harrington turns to meet her eyes, and his brows shoot up. “Oh. You think?”
Robin nods, hands fluttering.
Eddie stares at her blankly, waiting for her to say actual words, but Harrington just hums thoughtfully and says, “Huh, I totally missed that.”
“What?” Eddie asks, but he’s completely ignored as Robin huffs a laugh and makes another indecipherable series of movements. Cool. Eddie will just listen to half an incomprehensible conversation, then. Like a game of charades but infinitely worse.
“Hey! Not yet, at least,” Harrington says. “And I mean, yeah, obviously.”
Robin raises her eyebrows and bites her lip, drumming her fingers on her thighs. Harrington tilts his head, sets his hands on his hips, and says—
Nothing.
Fantastic.
Alright. Theory one: Harrington and Buckley are cyborgs, sent back to the past to ensure their successful overthrow of the human race. Admittedly unlikely, given the fact that he’s been in school with them for long enough to know that they definitely age like normal people—unless they were recently replaced with cyborgs or their design is so advanced that they can convincingly mimic human growth. Not to mention the number of times Harrington’s wandered into class with his face all bruised and bloody, not a hint of metal in sight. And Eddie seriously doubts he’s some sort of Sarah Conner; there’s no way he’ll ever be a vital part of fighting an apocalypse.
Theory two: Telepathic powers. Telepathy doesn’t really strike him as the sort of power that’d lead to a person becoming a murderer—though maybe he’s just biased from reading X-Men. ‘Cause, like, what if you heard something awful, like someone thinking about the best place to plant their bomb? Then it’d be your moral obligation to stop them, right? Kill one person to save many.
Though Eddie’s not really sure how Harrington’s probable victims fit into this scenario. Sure, Eddie’s thought some nasty things about the jocks at school, but he’d never actually hurt anyone. Just thinking about something doesn’t mean you’ll actually do it. There’s no way Barbara Holland or Bob Newby would’ve gone around setting buildings on fire just because they were bored and wondered how easy it would be to get away with. (Which is a question that Eddie’s never had, for any mind readers listening in right now.) And Hargrove’s thoughts were probably just as terrible as his actions, but the fact that he would beat people up for fun is what really matters, not whatever was going on inside his head.
Surely the first rule of telepathy is judging someone on their actions rather than their thoughts, right? Because most people have enough self restraint to not give in to their worst impulses.
Maybe instead of wanting to kill him for some sort of thoughtcrime, Harrington wants to kill him because his thoughts are inherently a crime. Like, maybe Eddie’s brain is just too loud and chaotic, and Harrington can’t tune it out, so murder is the only option if he wants to ever have peace again. He’s heard the kids mention Harrington’s headaches in hushed, secretive voices. And if they’re Eddie-induced headaches, then obviously they’d want to help Harrington kill him. He doesn’t have any illusions about where their loyalties lie first and foremost.
Can you hear me? Eddie thinks as loudly as possible, imagining the sound traveling straight from his head to Harrington’s like a phaser beam.
Harrington scratches just behind his ear, which isn’t very conclusive.
Hey, Harrington. Harrington. Harrington. Are you listening?
Harrington jolts and snaps his fingers. Is that a yes? He pulls something out of his pocket—probably a switchblade—and says, “Oh, hey, Rob, I got you an ornament for the tree.” He tosses it over to her, and she lets out a delighted gasp.
“Holy shit, Steve,” she says with actual human words, “he’s beautiful. Where did you find him?”
“At the thrift store,” he says, pleased as punch. “The woman who owns it gave him to me for free.”
“God, who would put a treasure like this at the thrift store?”
Harrington shrugs. “Some people have no taste.”
“What is it?” Eddie asks, leaning closer.
Robin hold it up so he can see better, and Eddie is confronted with the most fucked up Rudolph he’s ever seen. Honestly, it probably wouldn’t be recognizable as any sort of animal, let alone a reindeer, if not for the bright red nose on its sorry excuse for a head.
“Fuck, that’s incredible,” he breathes, reaching for it without thinking.
Harrington preens.
“Don’t even think about stealing him, Munson,” Robin growls, clutching melty Rudolph to her chest protectively and hopping off the counter to put some distance between them. “I’d fight to the death for him.”
He holds his hands up placatingly. “I wouldn’t dare, Buckley.”
“Oh, that reminds me,” Harrington starts, glancing at Eddie. “I didn’t want the kids to see this, so—” Harrington turns away, rooting through one of the cabinets for his sacrificial blade.
Does Eddie have time to make a run for it? He takes a surreptitious glance towards the doorway, only to find Robin oh-so-coincidentally in between him and his path to freedom.
So this is how it ends. Stabbed to death, throat slit in Steve Harrington’s kitchen at the tender age of nineteen.
He’s had a good run of it. Sure, he’s failed to graduate from high school twice, and he’s about to die a virgin, murdered by his crush, but— Yeah, he doesn’t have an end to that sentence. This whole thing absolutely blows.
“Here you go!” Harrington says brightly, spinning around with all the enthusiasm of a hyper puppy.
It’s genuinely unfair that he still looks this unfathomably hot when he’s literally stretching his arms forward to stab Eddie in the gut with—
Eddie frowns. Unusual weapon choice.
“What is that?”
Harrington rolls his eyes, propping one hand on his hip. The other gives the thing he’s holding a little jiggle. “Maybe you’ve never gotten a gift before, but the whole point is that you don’t know what it is until you unwrap it.” Then a second later, he winces. “Shit, that was— Sorry.”
“I thought we weren’t exchanging presents,” Eddie says warily.
Harrington shrugs. “I wasn’t going to invite you over and then force you to get me something, dude. That’d be a dick move.”
Dumbfounded, Eddie takes the present. He shakes it automatically; Harrington snorts but doesn’t protest the investigation. Nothing rattles, and it feels solid. Eddie’s fairly certain that it’s a book rather than something deadly. He still holds his breath as he breaks the seal of the tape, slowly peeling the paper away.
“Oh,” he breathes, blinking rapidly like that might change what he’s looking at.
“Do you like it?” Harrington asks, anxiety clear in his voice. Eddie’s fairly certain that he’s wringing his hands right now, though he can’t manage to actually look at him to check. “Will said it was published this year, but if you already bought it for yourself, I have the receipt, so you could get something else. Sorry, I don’t really know what you like other than Dungeons and—”
“Uh, no,” he croaks. “I mean, this is— I don’t have it yet. Didn’t. I—” Jesus, he feels like he’s going to vomit. He makes the mistake of glancing up, catching sight of Harrington, yes, wringing his hands, brow furrowed, putting on an Oscar worthy show of concern, and—
“I have to go call Gareth bye,” Eddie blurts, words probably unintelligible with how fast he spits them out. He darts for the stairs before Harrington has a chance to react.
“Gareth, he bought me Unearthed Arcana,” Eddie hisses the second the line connects.
“Um. Gareth, it’s for you,” a woman who is very much not Gareth says hesitantly. She hasn’t even bothered to cover the receiver, which is rude, frankly. “Some weirdo talking about digging? Dirt? I don’t know.”
There’s a muffled, “Oh, Jesus Christ,” and then Gareth says, “Yes?”
“Gareth, it’s me, your friend Eddie who is not a ghost yet but will be soon.”
He sighs, like dealing with Eddie in mortal peril is the greatest hardship of his life. “Yeah, I figured. It’s been, like, fifteen minutes; what could you possibly be having an issue about already? You freaked out my cousin.”
“Unearthed Arcana,” Eddie repeats. “Harrington bought a D&D book. Dungeons and Dragons.”
“Yes, I am aware of what ‘D&D’ stands for,” Gareth says drily.
“He bought a D&D book for me.”
Gareth lets out a low whistle. “Shit, now I kinda wish I was invited. Seems like a better party than my family’s having right now. Do you think I could’ve gotten a new drum out of him?”
“You are not helpful,” Eddie says, gritting his teeth.
“Oh, sorry. It’s so tragic that a cute boy bought you the book you’ve been whining about for months. Do you think you’ll manage to survive this ordeal?”
“Do you have memory issues? Obviously not because he’s planning to murder me.”
“Why would he buy you a present before killing you?”
“It’s actually for the kids, and he just gave it to me to lull me into a false sense of security? Or maybe his deity requires happy sacrifices. I don’t know! I’m not in his head!”
Gareth sighs again and asks, “Why am I the one who keeps having to deal with you?”
“Because you’re my nearest and dearest friend,” Eddie replies, voice saccharine.
Gareth scoffs.
“And because I didn’t want to piss off Jeff's mom, and Frank would just get me even more riled up. I need to keep a level head if I want to make it out of here alive.”
“This is you keeping a level head?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?!” Eddie shrieks.
“God, I hate being one of the only sensible people you know,” Gareth groans.
Eddie rolls his eyes. Like he’s not sensible. What does Gareth even know? He— Holy shit what is that?
“Hold that thought,” Eddie says, though he honestly doesn’t know what Gareth was just saying, so it might not have been a thought that merits holding. Much more important at the moment: “I’m being stared at by some sort of demon.”
“What.”
“It’s like some sort of fucked up cat?”
“Fucked up how?”
“I don’t know, it’s just creepy? And it’s staring directly into my soul. Like, you know that awful lemur that you had to do a project on? The one you complained about for weeks because you said it was giving you nightmares?”
“You said you would never bring it up again!”
“Well, anyway, picture that in cat form and then increase its evilness by approximately a thousand percent, and you might have a decent idea of what I’m looking at right now.”
“Christ, and this lives in his house?”
“Apparently. Unless it crawled in through whatever portal to hell he’s planning to shove me through.”
The sudden knock on the door would’ve given him a heart attack if it hadn’t been the familiar tap-tap-tap-tap, tap-tap pattern that the freshmen are always using. God, they’ve conditioned him, like one of Pavlov’s dogs salivating when it hears a bell. Have they trained him in other ways that he just hasn’t noticed yet?
“Uh, hey,” Robin says, hovering awkwardly just outside the room.
“Gare, I gotta go. I’ll call you later.” He just barely catches himself before saying hopefully.
“You really don’t have to. I—”
Eddie sets the phone down, then turns just enough so that he can face Robin while keeping the demon in his peripheral vision.
“Are you ok?” Robin asks and then gives him exactly zero seconds to answer. “Listen, I told the dingus down there that he shouldn’t buy you a present because it would make things awkward, but he’s, like, infuriatingly stubborn when he gets an idea in his head. So I get it. Or, I think I do. I don’t actually know what upset you, exactly. Is he coming on too strong? Or is buying books for a DM after they hit high school some sort of, like, nerd faux pas?”
“What? No, it’s not. Why would—?”
“Look, I don’t know what Steve did to you in high school, but I can promise that he’s not trying to buy your forgiveness or, like, flaunt his wealth or anything like that. He really does just genuinely enjoy getting people gifts. And I think it makes him feel better to use his Pawn Fund to make other people happy. Otherwise it just sits around, collecting dust and making him miserable.”
“Pawn Fund?”
“My name for it, not his. His asshole dad cut him off as soon as he graduated high school. But his mom and dad have… issues, so whenever his mom wants to piss his dad off, she sends Steve money. It’s fucked up and manipulative, but at least it means that Steve can spoil the kids at holidays.”
“Right,” Eddie says faintly.
“If it helps, you can just think of it like a gift he’s giving the kids, with you as his middle man or puppet or something.” She winces. “Ok, phrasing it like that makes it sound bad, but you get what I mean!”
Eddie honestly isn’t sure that he does. “I— Sorry, I can’t focus. Are you aware there’s some sort of hellcat in here?
Robin follows his line of sight, then lets out a horrified gasp. “Oh, Steve’s gonna kill you for insulting his baby.”
Fuck, what Eddie wouldn’t give for the ability to summon his DM poker face in times of crisis.
Whatever expression he makes sends Robin backpedaling furiously: “Kidding! Steve doesn’t have a violent bone in his body. Unless you threaten to hurt the kids, and then he’ll hit you with a car. But there were extenuating circumstances there, and he didn’t, like, enjoy it. Honestly, I think it sucked for him because getting into a car crash when you already have a concussion can’t be fun. But if he hadn’t, the kids and Nancy would be, like, definitely dead, so—” She finally stops for a breath and seems to take note of the fact that whatever that was didn’t help the situation even remotely.
“Okaaay,” she says, eyes darting around the room. She claps once. “Forget literally everything I just said! The point is that whatever you think you know about Steve, you’re wrong. I know what he and his friends used to be like in school, and I know what all the nerds and outcasts thought of him. But he’s nothing like that, ok? He’s honestly the best person I’ve ever met, so if all this—” She gestures at all of him “—is because of your preconceived notions about Steve? Knock it the fuck off. I’ll kill you before I let you hurt my soulmate.”
“Um. Noted,” Eddie says, because that honestly feels like the only safe response he could give.
“Ok, great!” Robin claps again and grins at him. “Now that that’s sorted, you should come back to the party. Steve just heard through the walkie chain that Mike is finally off his phone date, so the kids are actually on their way now. Come on. You, too, Keys.”
Eddie watches as the hellcat jumps down from the bed and trots over to Robin. “Harrington’s cat is named Keys.”
“Her legal name is Carmilla—”
“Like the vampire?”
“Yep.” Robin scoops the cat up, and she immediately perches on her shoulder like some sort of bizarre gargoyle. “But Steve has a friend in Indianapolis named Camilla—without the r—and he thought it’d be weird for her. Which she thought was weird, since she’s never been to his house and never plans to, so why would it matter, right? But Steve thought it’d be an issue or whatever, so we usually call her nicknames. I like Keys—or Car Keys—because I think it’s hilarious that she always tries to steal Steve’s keys to stop him from going to work.”
“Right,” Eddie says again. “Why not just name her something else?”
“Because she was pretty feral when he first got her and kept biting him hard enough to draw blood.”
“Ah.”
Robin frowns at him. “You still seem weird.”
“I’m not being weird!”
She gives him an unimpressed look. “I watched you pour an entire glass of water into a plant.”
“It looked dry!” It did not. It was probably the most vibrant and colorful thing in this awful house.
“A fake plant.”
Ah. Well, that would explain why the water just conspicuously pooled on top of the soil. He curls his shoulders in, tugging some hair across his face in a futile attempt to hide his blush. “Oh.”
“So, again, why are you being weird?”
“I’m always weird?” Eddie gestures to himself. “Eddie ‘The Freak’ Munson, remember?”
She rolls her eyes. “Yes, yes, you’re bizarre and off-putting; we get it. What’s actually up, though?”
“Nothing.”
She tries to set him on fire with her mind.
“Fine! I just— Has Harrington been replaced by a pod person or something?”
“Ugh, is he doing that thing where he doesn’t want to seem like a bully, but he overcorrects and is way too agreeable and it’s creepy?” Once again, she doesn’t wait for an answer. “I’ll deal with it. Now come back downstairs.”
Eddie casts one last forlorn look around the room, then trudges after Robin. Next time he’s in here, he will actually investigate. No more panicked phone calls to Gareth. But for now, he has to try to act normal around Harrington to assuage Robin’s suspicions. So once more unto the breach. He can do this.
*
(ch4 on ao3 or tumblr)
If you haven't read Do You Mind? (will you mind?) by GreenQueenofClubs (the fic where Steve is a telepath and Eddie's brain is too loud for him to tune it out), I'd highly recommend it!!
#steddie fic#stranger things fic#eddie munson#steve harrington#robin buckley#steddie#platonic stobin#stranger things fanfiction#series: make the yuletide gay#my fic#my writing#my post#st fic#wip#my wips#lol @ past me thinking this fic would only be four chapters#pls enjoy robin's arrival#she's the light of my life
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Chapter 4 of Make the Yuletide (even) Gay(er)
The next chapter of Christmas preparations for our friends, foes and everything in between is up!
There is a road-trip that might lead to questionable shipping choices (no, not that kind, the other kind with boxes and shit), graphic design is Kens passion, Jom has a day, Kim questions a lot of things.
#kinnporsche fic#kinnporsche the series#kinnporsche fanfic#fanfiction#ao3fic#ao3 fanfic#make the yuletide gay#this is just silly#again#just sillyness#do not take this seriously#at all
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“If you leave now, all the heat will escape. Just stay a little while longer.”
Make the Yuletide Gay part 6: Lisinda!
Yes, I will finish this series today. I have the last two parts written, so they’ll be appearing sometime today too, I just didn’t want to post all three at once!
#sso#ssoblr#my posts#lisinda#lisa peterson#linda chanda#sso fic#my fic#my writing#star stable online
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My media this week (1-7 Jan 2023)
📚 STUFF I READ 📚
🥰 2022 Holiday Epilogues (Cat Sebastian) - all the previous years' holiday epilogues + new story for 2022
🥰👂 The Hobbit, or There and Back Again (The Lord of the Rings #0) (J.R.R. Tolkien, author; Andy Serkis, narrator) - Serkis is a great narrator, full-stop but he does a very good McKellen Gandalf voice and then, of course, he IS Gollum (which I totally didn't even think about until he did the voice!)
😊 Burns Like a Gin (And I Like It) (Ennaess) - 51K, Geraskier - pt 2 of Might Ignite It - very hot series but of course these two can't do anything without some tasty angst LOL
🙂 Star Star (poorlittlegreenie) - 93K, steddie modern fake dating AU
🥰 Are You Flagging? (soidade) - 40K, steddie, canon-divergent AU - very enjoyable with the key tags being: Friends to Lovers, idiots to lovers, Bisexual Disaster Steve Harrington
🥰 After the click of the shutting (aesc, pearl_o) - (pt 3 of a series) 96K, cherik age-difference AU, really loved how this dug into how they have to work to make their broken edges fit together
💖💖 +270K of shorter fic so shout out to these I really loved 💖💖
Caleb Murphy Gets a Hug (Dira Sudis (dsudis)) - The Cabots series [Cat Sebastian]: Peter Cabot/Caleb Murphy, 2.3K - Yuletide 2022
Save the Date (Nabielka) - The Cabots series [Cat Sebastian]: Peter Cabot/Caleb Murphy, 1.3K - Yuletide 2022
Lifting (Spatz) - Sins of the Cities Series & Lilywhite Boys Series [KJ Charles]: Sukey & Emma, Justin Lazarus & Susan Lazarus, 1.8K - Yuletide 2022
a map of everyone who loves you (phonemicengineer) - Stranger Things: Steddie, 7K - gorgeous soulmark/soulflowers AU, tender and lovely
The Alexandrian Solution (Bexless) - Teen Wolf: Sterek, 5K - reread of a classic forever fave, still absolutely hilarious
Some Things Cosmic (stereobone) - Stranger Things: Steddie, 12K - a dream-sharing fix it fic, loved it
fate's in my hands (wearing_tearing) - Stranger Things: Steddie, 3.4K - very short but cute soulmark fic!
we miss being ruffians - Chapter 20: try to keep my skeletons in (napricot) - MCU: Stucky, 8K - this continues to be one of my fave series!!!!!
📺 STUFF I WATCHED 📺
Leverage: Redemption - s2, e8-9
Julie and The Phantoms - s1, e1-9
Hot Ones - Neil Patrick Harris Needs Magic to Escape Spicy Wings
Glass Onion
Uncoupled - s1, e1-2
🎧 PODCASTS 🎧
Our Opinions Are Correct - The Incredibly Strange Career of Anne Rice
Big Gay Fiction Podcast - Ep 411: From Hockey Fan to Hockey Romance Collaboration with L.A. Witt and Anna Zabo
It's Been a Minute - Millennials in Hollywood are making parents apologize on-screen
Vibe Check - A Test of the Emergency Rhythm Section
Switched on Pop - ICYMI 90s Music Canon
The Atlas Obscura Podcast - The Plant
Ologies with Alie Ward - Oneirology (DREAMS) with G. William Domhoff
Shedunnit Book Club - Book Club: Whose Body? by Dorothy L. Sayers
Renegades: Born in the USA - Our Unlikely Friendship
Into It - 2023 is the Year of Hollywood in Recession
The Atlas Obscura Podcast - Medical Clowning Program
Off Menu - Ep 91: Joel Kim Booster
Our Opinions Are Correct - Encore Episode: Has JK Rowling destroyed Harry Potter fandom?
🎶 MUSIC 🎶
Campfire Classics
Julie and The Phantoms (Season 1 soundtrack)
I'm Blue, Skies [Cheyenne Jackson]
Renaissance [Cheyenne Jackson]
Presenting Bonnie Raitt
By Women, For Women
Rockin' Around the Living Room
Endless R&B Throwbacks
This Is How We Do It: '90s R&B Party
#sunday reading recap#bookgeekgrrl's reading habits#bookgeekgrrl's soundtracks#the hobbit#fanfic ftw#glass onion#julie and the phantoms#leverage: redemption#uncoupled is bland for story but fantastic for nph‚ marcia gay harden‚ tisha campbell and andre de shields performances#it's a good show to have on in the background when you're folding laundry and painting nails#vibe check podcast#our opinions are correct podcast#off menu podcast#atlas obscura podcast#big gay fiction podcast#into it podcast#switched on pop podcast#shedunnit podcast#ologies podcast#renegages: born in the usa podcast#it's been a minute podcast#bonnie raitt#cheyenne jackson#'90s r&b#fan artists are a *gift*
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The Eclipse Ep 9 Stray Thoughts
Back to the slow burn romance due to homophobia in high school show. This is in competition with Takara-kun & Amagi-kun for Best Use of High School for the BL Summer '22 High School Extravaganza Awards Show.
Fuck Chadok so much, bro.
I am convinced Thua took the notebook originally.
Khaotung performing a panic attack is convincing. Good job to First with a very believable reaction.
Damn, and here I was hoping Ayan would that Dika was his uncle.
Requesting a sponge bath?? Oh, BL.
I half-expected Akk to find lube, condoms, and dildos in that drawer alongside the pills.
Man, the softness in Khaotung's voice when Ayan talked about how much he liked seeing Akk's family took me all the way back to Make The Yuletide Gay (2009) when Nathan lamented missing the way his mom used to talk to him. I'm not okay, y'all. Send some juice.
Ayan starts to feel just a little bit better and immediately resumes flirting.
Oh lord the return of the building code violation stairs. I need someone to die on those stairs in a drama.
It's such a relief to see Akk being mischievous when Ayan's mom asks about his life at school.
Ayan is not going to lose a trolling battle, of course. Akk is definitely dating someone.
I have no notes for this dinner. That was fun. BL is way more fun when the parents aren't homophobic and genuinely love their kids. I love watching parents troll their kids with pointed questions in front of their crushes.
I do like that the boys are diligent and clean the dishes after someone else cooks for them. And of course Ayan must flirt.
I say this often, but there is a special bond between gay boys and their moms. I'm glad she approves of Akk.
Again, I have no notes for this car conversation between Ayan's mom and Akk. She isn't meddling in their affairs beyond assuring Akk that she is grateful for his presence in her son's life. Her only request being that he not hurt himself takes me back to Until We Meet Again and Pharm's first meet with Dean's grandmother.
How deep does this go with Chadok?
I do love the way the World Remembers is toeing the line.
Wat's love of film being used against people must hurt him.
And now Namo has definitely decided to take initiative. I hope Nian is okay.
Ayan is launching a phishing attack. Amazing.
I do like that no matter what is going on, Ayan will choose to be a know-it-all and a flirt.
For once a sandwich is just a sandwich, and not product placement.
It's interesting in this conversation with Namo that the most common aspect of toxic masculinity resurfaces: the ability of any other man to question your manhood (or in this case, loyalty).
Thua is so careful that I ache sometimes. Leading Kan along with a series of innocuous inquiries before stating that he's fond of Bruce Wayne, and wants him to speak to him openly. He's even careful enough not to look at Kan's reactions because he already knows.
LOL did Kan really run to Ayan and tell him everything? I love how much Kan wants to come out that he's accelerating his reliance on Ayan.
Ayan asks a super romantic question, which allows Neo and Khaotung to show off that they can act with their eyes. Incredibly refreshing. I want more of them.
Ayan giving voice to how Kan feels, and his smile in response? My heart.
I love Ayan insisting that they're dating. First is also so funny with the way he plays Akk pout-eating.
Khaotung and First are a great pair. This wasabi sequence is a real treat.
I really hope we get to see a film from Wat at some point.
Why is First swimming like this?? Is he okay?? Baby boy, you gotta put that head in the water and stretch more. Don't bend your knees so much and keep those legs straight. Did they make him do this so we would see his face? This is a disaster!
Ayan is so right. Akk has such a nice face when he smiles.
The water they're in must be cold, and they must have been filming for a while. First is shivering. I noticed this in Minato's Laundromat too on Nishigaki Sho.
It's interesting that Akk has never once denied his attraction to Ayan. Even here his rejection of the kiss is location.
The underwater kiss still belongs to the gays!!!!! We stay winning!!!!
First can also act with his face.
Oh my next week looks like things still don't come to a head. Gah, where are we headed??
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911 Lone Star fic list
Episode Codas
I knew your love before I kissed you || 1.01 missing scene, honky tonk hookup | E | 3.6k
ain’t nothing but a heartache || 1.02 missing scene | E | 2.4k
what I want (what you deserve) || 1.04 coda, Carlos POV of lolaland‘s get it right, to get around me | E | 4k
I’m yours (and you’re mine) || 2.04 missing scene | E | 4.1k
despite it all || 3.04 Push coda | E | 3.2k
i had a dream last night || 3.18 morning after coda | E | 1.3k
Precious Love || 5+1, TK & love introspection, pre-canon, 1.02, 1.03, 3.13 & 3.18 codas | M | 11.6k
the strong will never fall || 4.04 coda | E | 1.6k
to love is to undress our names || 4.16 coda | E | 3.8k
Canon compliant / Post-canon
too stressed to undress || married!tarlos, fluff and smut, Lou II shenanigans | E | 3k
the way you make me feel (so real, so good) || married!tarlos, smut with feelings | E | 5.3k
and this is romance, let’s dance || 5+1, fluff and smut | E | 7.8k
these are the moments i cherish || married!tarlos, fluff and smut | E | 1.9k
Soon || married!tarlos, pwp, edging | E | 3.7k
Through the Looking Glass || married!tarlos, shower smut | E | 4.6k
love me as if I were forever || married!tarlos, fluff | M | 1.1k
what you need (i just need you) || married!tarlos | E | 2.9k
all i see is him right now || married!tarlos | E | 3.6k
every breath you take || future fic, married!tarlos, hurt/comfort | E | 4.2k
AUs
(Un)Professional Services (collab with @welcometololaland) || professional services au | E | 63k
A Helping Hand ||Grindr meet cute au | E | 6.7k
I gotta handle you just right || gym au (series) | E | 10.2k
Your Place or Mine || college au | E | 4.5k
Make the Yuletide Gay || college fake dating au | M | 19.7k
Let Me Hear Your Body Talk || gym au (series) | E | 2.4k
Let’s Get Physical || gym au (series) | E | 6k
Other
so kiss me (tarlos version); a collection of ficlets about kisses, ratings vary
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Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas Now
Part of my Christmas series from last year. Posted on Ao3 here.
Series: NCIS: Hawai’i
Ship: Kacy
Characters: Lucy Tara, Kate Whistler
Christmas Eve
Lucy hadn’t gotten used to the boat.
Or, well, that wasn’t exactly true. She was definitely doing better on the boat than she had been. As long as she didn’t walk too close to the edge, she was able to ignore the fact that she was on a boat at all. But there were times when it was hard to forget that she had, of her own free will, signed up to be on the ocean for four months.
Tonight, it was a storm. The aircraft carrier was too big to really roll with the waves, but from her room she could hear the water beating against the sides, and it was very difficult to pretend she wasn’t on the ocean when she could hear it below her.
More than that, she was worried that the storm would mess up her Christmas plans.
She was startled out of her thoughts, and boat-related queasiness, when her phone rang. She looked down at the display and then almost dropped it in an effort to answer as quickly as possible. “Merry Christmas, my love,” she greeted happily. There wasn’t an answer, and she frowned, worried. “Kate?”
“Have yourself a merry little Christmas
Let your heart be light
From now on our troubles will be out of sight”
“Are you really …” Lucy laughed brightly. “I can’t believe you’re doing this again.”
“Have yourself a merry little Christmas
Make the Yuletide gay …”
Lucy snorted.
“From now on our troubles will be miles away
Here we are as in olden days, happy golden days of yore
Faithful friends who are dear to us
Gather near to us once more”
Something twinged in her chest. The team wasn’t celebrating Christmas together or anything, but she knew they’d had dinner a couple nights ago. She wished she could’ve been there.
“Someday soon we all will be together, if the fates allow
Until then, we’ll have to muddle through somehow
And have yourself a merry little Christmas now.”
“I love you,” Lucy said softly, trying not to let the tears in the corners of her eyes spill over, even if Kate wasn’t there to see them.
“I love you, too.”
*
Christmas Day
Kate sat on the couch, trying to think of something to do. She’d had a brief, strained conversation with her parents already, and she wouldn’t be able to call Lucy for another few hours with the time zones. She could go surfing, but she’d already gone earlier this week. No one would be answering work e-mails if she sent them, and doing paperwork on Christmas was a little too sad.
She’d made up her mind to watch a movie, maybe even drink some of Lucy’s hot chocolate - because even she could admit that her mushroom coffee wasn’t exactly festive - when the latch to the front door lock turned. She stood up quickly and was wishing she’d brought her firearm into the living room when the door swung open and there stood Lucy, holding a small duffle bag and wearing a beaming smile. “Merry Christmas!”
Kate blinked. “Wait … what … how?”
Lucy walked into the apartment and shut the door, still grinning ear to ear. “We were scheduled to dock at five AM, shore leave for three days. I had a flight booked at eight. But the docks are crowded today so I wasn’t sure I’d make it, and I didn’t want to say anything in case it didn’t work out, and … I wanted to surprise you.”
“Well, I’m surprised.”
“I can tell.” Lucy dropped her bag and took a few hesitant steps forward. “Is it a happy surprise, or …”
“Yes, of course, I just … I can’t believe you’re here.” Kate blinked, and suddenly realized she was on the verge of tears. “Oh my God, you’re here!” Laughing wetly, she finally broke out of her paralyzed state to walk the remaining distance to her girlfriend and wrap her up in her arms.
“Well, after that song, I had to come home,” Lucy said, nuzzling into notch at the base of Kate’s neck.
“So hearing me sing made you miss me so much that you had to immediately fly to me?”
“Nope. You said to make the Yuletide gay, and I couldn’t do that on my own.”
Kate laughed and groaned at the same time as her girlfriend pulled away enough to smirk mischievously up at her. She opened her mouth to tease her, but instead said, “I missed you so much.”
Lucy’s smile dipped. She reached up and tucked Kate’s hair behind her ear and left her hand there, thumb caressing her cheek. “Me, too. Only three months left.”
She put her hand over Lucy’s, and turned to press a kiss into her palm. “Two months, three weeks and one day.” She cleared her throat, trying not to get any closer to crying than she already had. “When do you have to leave?”
“We ship out on the twenty-eighth, so I’m flying back Tuesday night.”
“Two months, two weeks, and five days, give or take a couple hours. That’s not so bad.”
“I guess not.” Lucy pressed closer. “But I definitely want to make the most of being here now.”
Kate smiled. “You do, huh?” And then she bent down and kissed her, sighing into soft lips, the warmth of Lucy so familiar as she pushed up on the balls of her feet for better leverage and her hand clutched in Kate’s hair.
Long minutes later, Lucy broke away, her lips now a little pinker than they had been. She leaned towards Kate’s ear and quietly sang, “And have yourself a merry little Christmas now.”
#NCIS: Hawai'i#NCIS:Hawaii#Kacy#Lucy x Kate#Kate x Lucy#Lucy Tara#Kate Whistler#the flyer and the surfer#dragonbinx fics
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