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therealcocoshady · 13 hours

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Recovery - Chapter 35

Eminem x Female Reader Fanfiction

Synopsis : Reader is mad at Em after their heated argument and he does everything he can not to lose her.

Y/N’s POV

You had decided to sleep in one of the guest rooms after your argument with Marshall. He had tried to reason with you, apologize for the millionth time and tell you he loved you but you just needed to be in a different room and not see or hear him. With him begging and pleading, it was impossible to process your feelings. After you locked yourself in the guest room, you heard him knock and apologize for a while but he eventually went away when he understood that you would not open the door, let alone talk to him. To say you were hurt would be the understatement of the year. How did he dare accuse you of lying ? How did he dare imply that you would not deserve to raise children when he knew full well that it was all that you wanted for yourself ? You understood that he might have said that out of anger, fear or whatever extreme emotion he might have felt in the moment but that was no excuse. And it did prove one thing : after knowing you for nearly two years, having witnessed you work towards recovery, he still saw you as an addict. This made you feel worthless, like everything you had done, all the meetings, the therapy sessions had done no good and that you would always be seen as the stupid girl who made a couple of bad decisions because she had a hard time handling trauma. Before messing with your anxiety prescription and eventually overdosing, you had never done a lot of drugs. You had never been the party type, drinking too much and experimenting with substances. The heaviest thing you had ever tried was smoking weed during trips to Amsterdam with your friends from college. You were not a crackhead, for crying out loud ! Looking at the bigger picture, your experience with drugs was limited and represented a few months. It could have been worse. You did not want to minimize your mistakes, but you also did not want them to be held against you for the rest of your life. You were twenty-eight, you still had a lifetime ahead of you. Three months messing with Xanax should not earn you a life sentence. And if Marshall thought different, to hell with him.

Having him throw all these things in your face hurt on so many different levels and you cried yourself to sleep. Out of anger, sadness and frustration. And on top of that, you had to deal with the guilt of feeling unable to truly rejoice for Talia. You were feeling more lonely than ever. The last time you had felt this lonely was after you lost your baby. Simon was there physically but nowhere to be found on an emotional level and your friends, despite trying their best, did not really understand what you were going through. Now, things were different but also similar in a way : you couldn’t really talk to your friends and it was painfully obvious that your partner would not be of any support. All you had wanted for the night was to have some peace, some alone time and, eventually, Marshall’s arms to fall asleep in. Instead, you had an argument that led you to sleep in a guest room and a possible breakup on your mind.

You didn’t want to break up with Marshall. Even after the awful things he threw in your face, you were still in love with him. It didn’t make sense. If anything, you should hate him. And in a way, you did. But you still loved him. The perspective of breaking up was making you sick to your stomach but what choice did you have, when the person you loved the most, the one who was supposed to protect you, be there for you and have your back did not respect you and thought of you as a failure ? Yes, he had apologized countless times and professed his love for you, but what good did it do if he saw you as an addict and a charity case ?

The only reason you managed to sleep at all was from the exhaustion from crying. You had sobbed so much that your head was hurting when you woke up, your vision still blurry. That’s when you felt a presence in bed, next to you. You rubbed your eyes and saw Marshall laying there, staring at you intently with bloodshot eyes. You had locked the door behind you. What the hell was he doing here ? How long had he been staring at you for ?

What are you doing here ? You asked in a raspy voice. How did you even get here ?

Masterkey. Baby… I can’t sleep without you, he said. I don’t want to sleep without you. Not tonight. Not ever.

So you thought you’d stare at me in my sleep like some sicko ?

Y/N, I… Please don’t do this, he sighed. Don’t leave me.

He was staring into your eyes, as if he were trying to read into your soul. He was wearing a white tank top and gray sweatpants. He knew full well that was the clothes you liked the most on him. You had told him countless times how sexy he was in them. And you had to admit that, laying on top of the covers, icy blue eyes and muscles on full display, he was a vision. Even when you were mad at him, he had you drooling and it was painfully unfair.

Marshall…, you began.

I can’t lose you, he pleaded. I don’t want to lose you. I can’t live without you.

You hurt me, you said as you swallowed dryly. You really hurt me.

I know, baby, I-

No you don’t ! You interjected. You have absolutely no idea how bad it hurts. This is worse than the time you told me I should have overdosed before we met. Losing this baby, it’s the worse thing that ever happened to me. How dare you tell me I shouldn’t get to be a mother ?! How dare you tell me that when it was my biggest dream and the reason for our breakup ? How dare the man I told everything about my miscarriage to, the one who consoled me when I was hurting, say something so mean when I gave up on this dream in order to be with him ?!

I’m so sorry, he sobbed. I don’t deserve you. I know it. I fucked up.

And I don’t deserve you either ! You spat. I deserve better. You said you had my back. You said you were here for me. You were supposed to be my best friend in the world. You were supposed to protect me. You had me believing that I could recover. The man who gave me this fucking sobriety pendant and told me I wasn’t alone doesn’t believe in me and thinks I’m basically a crackhead !

No, Y/N, it’s not true, he said. I don’t think that at all. You’re so strong. I know it. I see it.

Then why would you say what you said ? You cried. What good reason can you possibly have for hurting me this bad ?

I… It’s hard to explain.

The both of you were crying, laying in bed, staring at each other. Seeing Marshall in tears broke your heart but, hell, he had broken yours. You were mad at yourself for having so much empathy for him. He reached for your hand and, with the other, wiped his tears.

Look, I know it’s no excuse, but… When I saw the tests, I freaked out, he said. Because it’s not even that I don’t want kids. I mean, I don’t, because I’ve had three beautiful daughters, I feel like my family is complete and, who wants to change diapers in their fifties anyway ? Or be mistaken for their child’s grandpa ? But really… When I thought you were pregnant, I was terrified. Because there is no fucking way I can be chill with the idea of having another baby when I put mine through so much. I traumatized my daughters. Their mom traumatized them too. Their parents were fucking zombies. They saw us struggle. No child should ever, ever see that. No kid should have to call 911 because their dad is dying on the bathroom floor, or have to wait for their mom to call them from jail. They should not have to say “Mom is in rehab. Again. She was sober for years but she relapsed and now she’s a mess”. I can’t even begin to tell you all about the times my kids didn’t have their parents with them for important events. Or the times when we were there but not mentally present.

You stared at him in silence as he spoke. He had already told you about his addiction, how he had struggled, but he had never really spoken about the impact it had on his daughters, on his family. Tears were falling down his cheeks as he spoke and you could tell the memories were still vivid.

And when I say that addicts are shitty parents, I’m just talking from my experience, he continued. No matter how much I’m trying now, no matter how long I’ve been sober, it doesn’t erase everything the girls have been through. And I can’t, in good conscience, have another child. Being an addict doesn’t mean you don’t love your kids to death. But it means that they have to put up with a lot and might end up having to care for you when, really, you’re the one who should take care of them. And I won’t even get into the bad genetics they might inherit. When I got back from the hospital, the girls had to take care of me. And throughout the years, they’ve had to take care of Kim, too.

I know, you said. And I’m so sorry you had to go through this but… You were mean to me. You were cruel.

I never meant to say you wouldn’t be a loving mother, he explained. Because there is absolutely no doubt in my mind about this. And I know it’s a sensitive subject for you. What I really meant to say is that, even though you’ve worked so hard, even though you’re doing so good, there is no certainty you won’t relapse at one point or another. It doesn’t mean I don’t trust you, it doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t be there for you if something happened. It means that it’s scaring the living shit out of me. I wouldn’t be able to handle having a kid with anyone, but if I’m being honest, I couldn’t handle the pressure of having one with you especially, because I’d be even more scared.

You nodded sheepishly. When he put it in these words, it made more sense. You were still hurt but, in a way, you would see where he was coming from.

But I realize that… It’s a me issue, for the most part, you know ? He finally said. And I guess that, just because it’s the way I see things doesn’t mean it has to be true for you. I know we’re in different situations.

Yes, you said with tears in your eyes. Because for me… It was three months, Marshall. I only used for three months. And it doesn’t change the fact that I made mistakes. But I don’t want to be thought of as an addict for the rest of my life. Because that’s not who I am. It shouldn’t have to define who I am. And I will not have you think of me as a charity case.

I know, he agreed. I fucked up. I’m sorry. But I don’t want to lose you. I can’t lose you. For the record, I don’t think of you as an addict. And you are not a charity case. You have never been. Even at the beginning, we bonded over the topic of addiction and I wanted to be there for you, but it was never about charity or whatever. Or maybe it was, but with me being the damn charity case.

I never saw you like that, you said.

Before I met you, I was a fucking mess, you know ? He said. I was sober for fifteen years, I was doing good on paper, but I wasn’t… I wasn’t happy. I never really thought I could be. Content, maybe. But happy ? No. You’re the one who showed me what true happiness looks like. You were never a fucking charity case, Y/N. You’re the air I breathe.

You could see the sincerity in his eyes. He was holding your hand in his and staring at you. Things seemed a bit clearer now but you weren’t ok. Maybe he didn’t actually mean all the things he’d said, but you still took them to heart. You stared back at him, not saying much. And if you weren’t pushing him away, you weren’t exactly making a move in his direction either. You were just sitting in bed, feeling emotionally drained.

I’m really sorry, you know, he reiterated. I know I’ve said that a hundred million times tonight, but I mean it. Can you forgive me ?

I… I don’t know, you said blandly.

I’ll do whatever it takes, Y/N, he said. I swear to God, all you have to do is tell me what to do and I’ll fucking do it. I’ll jump in front of a train, I’ll sell a kidney, I’ll take my heart out of my chest and offer it to you. Anything.

Can you… Leave me alone ? You asked.

He looked absolutely heartbroken and you didn’t want to hurt him but, at the same time, you didn’t want a sacrifice. What you wanted, what you really needed was time and space. You looked at him as he swallowed dryly. There was a hint of panic in his eyes.

Please don’t leave, he pleaded.

I need time, Marshall, you explained. I need space.

Please, he begged.

He cupped your face and whispered to you how much he loved you, how much he needed you. “I can’t lose you”, he kept on saying. He then proceeded to kiss your forehead, your cheeks, your lips… He seemed virtually unable to let go of you. You burst into tears as soon as his lips touched yours and he held you as you sobbed in his arms, repeating how sorry he was. Your tears were getting his tank top wet but he didn’t seem to care. He kept on spilling soft kisses on your face, holding you close. You let him kiss you as you clutched his top. His hands slowly started to wander, gently stroking your thighs. “Let me show you how much I love you”, he whispered before kissing you. You enjoyed his touch, the warmth of his embrace… But something was still off. You didn’t feel in the right headspace. You knew he loved you, but you didn’t feel safe on an emotional level.

Marshall… No, you simply whispered.

Are you alright ? He asked. What can I do ?

Please, just leave, you asked with tears in your eyes.

He bit his lower lip but eventually nodded. He stroked your cheek with a worried look before getting up and walking towards the door. He took one last look at you as you muttered an apology. After he closed the door, you let your head fall onto the pillow.

MARSHALL’S POV

After leaving Y/N alone in the guest bedroom, Marshall was unable to sleep. He had fucked up big time, he knew it. And now, she might leave his sorry ass. For good, this time. The perspective of her walking away from him again was making him sick to his stomach. He kept on thinking he’d done everything wrong in their relationship, perhaps from the start. All he wanted was to give her the very best in life but he kept on fucking up, on saying the wrong things, on letting his anger and past trauma take over. Perhaps he was right when he said he’d end up alone. He was consumed by self-loathing and self-hatred, with absolutely no clue as to how he could possibly make things right (assuming it was even possible). His mind kept on going to the darkest places. He’d always been prone to weird, dark and intrusive thoughts but it’d been a long time since he had felt this way. Ever since they had gotten back together, life had been sunshine and candy. Now, it was the contrary. He kept on filling pages upon pages in his notebook with words, rhymes, schemes, phrases… If anyone ever found this, they would probably call a psych ward to have him committed. His lyric sheets had always resembled the scribblings of a mad man - something a lot of people made fun of him for - but these pages were something else. They were deeply disturbing. Probably because that’s exactly what his thoughts were. Disturbing. After a night alone in the living room, staring at the ceiling and writing, he decided not to go to the studio. Whenever he was having a bad day, going to work and keeping up with his rigorous 9 to 5 schedule usually helped but, this time, he didn’t have it in him to get ready, get in his car and go to work like nothing happened. Not when Y/N might be gone by the time he would come back. So much for their first holiday as a family. For the perfect future he had planned for them. For all the places he wanted to take her. All the plans he wanted to make. He couldn’t imagine facing his family and telling them that he had fucked up. He could already see the look of disappointment on his daughters’ faces. They had managed for Y/N to get back to him only for him to ruin everything.

He was laying on the couch when he heard her come down. He immediately went to see her.

Hey, he said.

Good morning, she replied.

Did you sleep well ? He asked in a sad attempt to make small talk and connect with her.

Not really, she admitted. Aren’t you late for work ?

I’m not going, he said. Not today. Look… Can we talk ?

I came to talk to you, actually, she said. I have made up my mind. About leaving.

For a few seconds, she didn’t say anything and time seemed frozen. He found himself unable to breathe as he stared at her, waiting for her to elaborate and put him out of his misery. He needed to know. These few seconds were absolute torture. The nine circles of hell.

So ? He asked nervously.

I don’t want to leave, Marshall, she said. I want to give us a chance.

Thank God, he sighed as he went for an embrace.

But, she said intently as she put distance between the two of them, I need time.

O-ok, he said. Sure. Whatever you need, baby. Whatever you want. I told you, I’ll do anything, I’ll give you whatever you ask for.

Would you consider therapy ? She asked carefully.

I already do therapy, he replied with a puzzled look on his face.

You haven’t been to therapy since we came back from Europe, she pointed out. And I know that it’s mostly addiction counseling. With everything you told me yesterday, it’s clear that you have unresolved trauma that you should work on. So that you don’t take it out on me. And so that you can move on.

I-I don’t think it’s something you can move from, he said honestly. But yeah, sure. If that’s what it takes, I’ll do it.

Ok, she said. Thank you.

Is that all ? He asked nervously.

And I’m taking over the guest bedroom, she added.

You want to sleep apart ?! He blurted out.

I told you I need time, she said. Marsh, I… I love you. With all my heart. And I know you’re sorry. But I’m still hurt. And I have a lot to process. I’ll still be in the house, I’m not moving out.

Ok, he sighed.

He wasn’t happy about the prospect of spending more nights away from her, but at least she wasn’t moving out and that was enough for him to be able to breathe properly again. He would just have to suffer through it and do his best not to fuck things up. Y/N went to her appointment and he waited patiently, not too sure what to do. When she came back, she informed him that Talia would be coming over. No offense to Y/N’s best friend, but he had absolutely no wish to see anyone, so he simply decided to retreat in his home studio, trying to at least do something with all the lyrics he had written. Putting together tracks and getting the words out of his head was therapeutic, more so than any amount of time he would spend in a shrink’s office. He’d seen therapists before. When he started addiction counseling, he’d been advised to seek help regarding his childhood trauma, but he wasn’t too keen. So therapy had mainly been focused on his anger issues, his anxiety regarding work and addiction. He wasn’t a big fan of therapy, but if that’s what it took for Y/N to forgive him, he would bite the bullet. When he went back to the living room, at the end of the day, he was spent and his voice was raspy. He had been yelling in the mic a bit more than he usually did but, at least, his mind was a bit clearer. He found Y/N and Talia on the couch, drinking tea and looking at bridal magazines.

Hi Em, Talia said with a huge smile before hugging him.

Hey, he said. How’s wedding planning going ?

Lots to do, she said as she gestured to the pile of notebooks and magazines on their coffee table. By the way… Are you free two months from today ?

I’d have to check with Tracy about my schedule, he shrugged. Why ?

Because I’m getting married, she shrieked ! We have a date !

That’s… soon, he pointed out.

Well, I told Y/N not to tell you, and we’re not telling people yet, but you’re Jamal’s best man so you might as well know… We’re having a baby !

He looked at Y/N who was standing behind Talia, gesturing to him not to say anything. Obviously he wasn’t supposed to know. He smiled and congratulated her. He could see a sullen expression on his girlfriend’s face while Talia was talking about how Jamal took the news. Apparently, he was surprised but overjoyed and they decided to get married before she started showing. Y/N was smiling but he could see that she was not doing too well. Given everything he knew about how hard losing her own baby had been for her, it wasn’t too surprising.

So, anyway, we’re going to need all the help we can get, Talia said. Can we count on you, Em ?

Sure, he sighed. But don’t count on me to help pick flowers or stuff like that…

Can you at least hook Jamal with one of your stylists so that he has a decent tux ? Oh, and if you know a venue we can use, too… I mean, I bet you’ve visited a few between Hailie’s engagement and Alaina’s wedding.

None that can fit your guest list, he chuckled. Jamal has told me about it. Nothing that’s available two months from now can accommodate 350 guests !

Believe it or not, they have actually agreed to shrink it down, Y/N said with a slight grin. We’re down to 50 guests.

Only because we’re having a second wedding after the baby is born, Talia warned. This is basically eloping. With a few guests, a party and an actual ceremony.

So it’s an actual wedding, he said.

Y/N and Talia went back to their wedding planning. From what he gathered, his girlfriend would have her hands full for the next two months. He went to chill in his office for a bit, listening to some music. When it was dinner time, he went to see Y/N and ask if she wanted to have dinner but found her on the couch, curled into a ball. She was crying and seemed in pain. Talia was gone.

Baby, what’s wrong ?! He asked as he checked on her.

Nothing, she mumbled. I got an IUD inserted this morning and I’m having contractions and cramps. They said it’s normal, though.

I’m sorry, he said. Is there anything I can do ?

Don’t worry about it, she said.

She tried to move and pick her phone from the table but even that seemed too hard to do for her.

You seemed fine, earlier, he commented.

They gave me pain medication immediately after but it’s starting to wear off, she explained. Plus, I didn’t want to worry Talia, you know ?

Right, he said. Don’t you have any pain meds you can take ?

They prescribed some for me but they warned me it was pretty strong so I didn’t pick up the prescription.

Oh, he said. Do you want me to take you to the doctor ? ER ?

It’s fine, she said. Don’t worry about it.

Maybe you should have taken the prescription, he commented. I don’t like seeing you in pain.

I still don’t fully trust myself, you know ? She said as she nervously played with her sobriety pendant.

You’re stronger than you think, Y/N, he replied. I mean it.

No you don’t, she huffed.

Yeah I do, he insisted. Remember, when we started hanging out, when I told you nothing would happen between us ? I thought your sobriety was too new and I was scared But you proved me wrong. You’re doing so good. It’s impressive.

Thanks, she said sheepishly.

You never cease to amaze me, you know ?

She blushed and smiled a little. Watching her act so shy made him realize what an asshole he’d been for failing to protect that smile. She was too precious and she had absolutely no idea about it. All he wanted to do was to take care of her. And that was exactly his plan.

I wanted to know if you were hungry. Do you want to eat dinner ? He asked.

Sure, why not, she said as she started to get up.

Stay here, he said. I’ll cook.

I can do it, she assured him.

You’re not in the state to cook, he pointed out. Let me take care of you, ok ?

Before she got a chance to protest, he went to get her hot water bottle, her favorite blanket, a hoodie and the book on her bedside table and brought them to her before heading to the kitchen and preparing something to eat. They ate in relative silence. He couldn’t speak for her but he wasn’t too sure what to say. At that point, he’d apologized enough times that she knew for a fact how sorry he was. She was a bit distant but, at this point, she didn’t seem too mad either. Ever since they started dating, it was the first time they had an argument that wasn’t solved in the next hour. With anyone else, he wouldn’t have cared too much but with Y/N, he hated it, probably because he realized it was his first serious, loving relationship with someone who had a rather healthy outlook on relationships. No shade to Kim, he had truly loved her but, looking back, he knew they’d been doomed from the beginning, always scheming and playing games. Y/N, on the other hand, had always been brutally honest, when she made it clear that she was attracted to him, or when she broke up with him to stay true to her dreams. He’d always been used to his partners bending their own rules in order to be with him, wanting to be with him at all costs even if it meant that the whole thing would be unhealthy and disingenuous, but Y/N was not like that. She was honest and true. She would rather leave than take bullshit and, even for his fifty-two year-old self, it was intimidating.

Thank you for taking care of me, she said softly.

I take my job seriously, he said with a slight smile. I promised to care for you and I fully intend to stick to the plan.

You don’t have to, you know ?

I want to, he replied. How’s the pain ?

The water bottle helps, she shrugged. I think I’ll go to bed, though. I’m tired.

Before she could get up, he wrapped his arms around her and lifted her up before carrying her up the stairs. She gasped in surprise but let him. She was securing herself with her arms around his neck.

You know… I could have walked, she pointed out.

Oh. Too late, he said innocently - enjoying the contact with her far too much.

He let her down on the bed in the guest bedroom. For a split second, he considered bringing her to their bedroom but he wanted her to see he respected her decision, however strongly he might disagree with it. He wasn’t sure how he could be expected to sleep well without her. Last night had been a nightmare, just like any night without her. In retrospect, it was a miracle he hadn’t ended up in the hospital in the six months they’d been apart. He had gotten so little rest. To be fair, he had Talia and Jamal to thank for keeping him somewhat sane and healthy. He wouldn’t have been able to release the album and tour otherwise. Hopefully, this time, he wouldn’t have to sleep without her for the next six months.

So, do you need anything ? He asked as he tried to hide his nervosity.

I think I’ll be fine, she replied with a soft smile.

Look, I saw the look on your face, earlier, when Talia was here, he said. Are you sure you’re alright ?

I’m triggered, that’s all, she said as she looked down. These contractions are bringing memories. So does Talia’s pregnancy. If I’m being honest, I’m having a bit of a… hard time rejoicing for her.

Tears were welling in her eyes and he could not resist the urge to hold her. He sat on the bed and pulled her in his arms. She looked at him with a sad look on her face.

I’m a terrible person, she muttered under her breath. My best friends are having a baby and I’m thinking about myself.

You’re not, he assured her. Considering what you’ve been through, it’s absolutely understandable. And I guess I didn’t really help last night, with my shitty remarks…

Not really, she admitted.

You’re a great friend, Y/N, he said reassuringly. You just need a little time.

I guess, she shrugged. Plus, they deserve to have a happy family life, you know ? That’s everything Talia’s ever wanted. They’re going to be amazing parents.

They are, he nodded. And they’re pretty lucky to have you, too.

You think ? She sighed.

Of course, he said. You’re always there for people. Look, you’re even putting together their wedding at the last minute.

That’s the least I can do, you know ? They’ve always been so good to me. I just want to make them happy.

He pressed a kiss to her temple and she gave him a weak smile.

I think I should sleep, she said softly.

Ok, he replied. Call me if you need anything ?

Sure. Thanks, Marshall.

They stared at each other in silence. Sleeping in separate rooms felt unnatural and he could tell she felt it too. He reluctantly left her and went to their room, though he knew for a fact he wouldn’t be able to sleep.

In the following days, things seemed to ease up a little. Y/N was still a little distant and keeping to herself but, from the looks of it, she could see he was making efforts. He tried not being too obvious and not sucking up to her too much but he also wanted her to see that he was serious when he said he would do whatever it takes. They managed to have small talks and ate dinner together in front of the TV before going to sleep - still in separate rooms. As for physical intimacy, it was sparse. The only thing he got away with was holding her hand. It was incredibly frustrating - having her so close but so far away at the same time while trying his best to get her to forgive him. He was nervously beating around the bush, avoiding the topic but it was driving him crazy. In all of his previous relationships, it would have led to angry sex and the matter would have been settled and buried only to be dug up for the next argument. Not very healthy but, at least, he wouldn’t have to sleep alone. Thankfully, the evening before Thanksgiving, the universe seemed to be on his side. When he got back from the studio, he found Y/N in the home theater, preparing to watch a movie.

Hey, he said. Mind if I join you ?

Sure, she replied with a smile. How was your day ?

It was alright, he said. What are we watching ?

You can choose, she offered. I just wanted to get my mind off flower arrangements for a minute.

Horror movie ? He suggested. I bet we can find one where a bridezilla gets killed, that might comfort you.

Hey, Talia’s not that bad, she giggled. But yeah, let’s go for horror !

She seemed in a good mood, which was a good sign. They settled on a movie and he joined her on the couch. In all honesty, he couldn’t care less about the movie - all he wanted was to be with her. And the only reason he had suggested watching a horror movie was because he knew she was chicken-hearted and, at that point, he would take any excuse and opportunity to hold her. If that implied relying on a jumpscare scene, so be it. He usually had better moves than that with the ladies, but this felt like a last resort. Sure enough, a scary scene came up and he saw her jump up a bit. He tried to hide a smile and he wrapped an arm around her shoulders. She muttered a “thank you” and focused on the movie. Every time the atmosphere got tense in the movie, he could feel her squirming and nervously bite her lip. And every single time, he pulled her a bit closer to him, until her legs were practically over his. He was almost brought back to the times when they were just friends and every brush against her took his breath away. Being with her, he had gotten used to the proximity, but now that she had deprived him of her touch, it felt the same as before. She took him by surprise by reaching for his hand and interlocking their fingers. He was feeling like a teenager on his first date at the movies. Should he try and kiss her ? Or would it ruin the moment ? It was stupid how much power she had over him. How nervous she could make him, and her ability to make him fall for her all over again just by holding hands. Another jumpscare scene occurred and she let out a small scream before hiding her face in his neck. God bless horror movies. He couldn’t contain a small laugh.

You’re enjoying this, aren’t you ? She whispered accusingly.

I missed this, he admitted. I missed you.

I missed you too, you know ?

She looked at him and he could not resist the temptation to capture her lips with his own. She immediately kissed him back, her lips feeling softer than ever. Four days without her touch was way too long. He could feel his heart rate increasing as her lips parted and their tongues found each other. He ran his fingers through her hair while she traced his shoulders with her fingers. Her touch was electrifying and he simply couldn’t get enough. He kissed her over and over again.

I love you, he whispered. I love you so much.

I love you too, she said emotionally.

I need you, he pleaded. Let me make love to you.

Ok, she whispered, her breath accelerating.

As soon as she spoke, he did not waste time and got up before taking her hand and leading her to the bedroom. Their bedroom. He closed and locked the door behind them, making it clear that she was not going anywhere. Thankfully, she didn’t seem to want to. She was looking at him in anticipation. He went back to her and kissed her passionately before pushing her on the bed. He took his time making love to her, enjoying her soft moans and the sensation of her legs around his waist. Her nails scratched his back as she cried his name when they both reached their apex. He wrapped his arms around her and nuzzled her neck as they caught their breath.

You’re incredible, he said lovingly. And I’m never letting you out of this room ever again.

Really ? She giggled.

Try me, he said with a grin.

She gave him a playful look and tried to get out of bed but he held her even closer, causing her to struggle a little. She tried wrestling him, but to no avail. Eventually, she gave in to his warm embrace and let her head roll onto his chest.

So… I guess I have no choice but to sleep here tonight ?

Don’t tell me you were seriously thinking about sleeping in the other room ? He groaned.

Not really, she confessed with a small smile. I don’t like sleeping apart. I hate being mad at you, you know ?

And I hate it when you’re mad at me, he replied. I’ll do better. I promise.

I know, she shrugged. Sorry it took me a while to cool off.

I really hurt you, he said. I understand. But just so you know, I want to do everything I can to deserve you.

In all fairness, it wasn’t just you, you know ? She explained. It was a lot to process in very little time. I was triggered and brought back to some tough memories. I needed a little time on my own…

I get it, he said. I missed you, though.

I missed you too, she said.

I don’t want to lose you, Y/N, he said in all seriousness.

I know, she said. I’m still here.

He nodded and closed his eyes, relaxing a bit as she traced the outline of his tattoos with her index. She let out a small giggle as she looked at his stomach tattoo.

What ? He asked as he opened an eye.

I just remembered I’m meeting the woman whose name I see every time I go down on you, she said with a smirk.

He was a bit taken aback by the comment. She was smiling but it was the first time she commented on Kim’s name being tattooed on him. He’d had these for so long that he tended to forget about them anyway. Now that she mentioned seeing the tattoo every time she went down on him, though, he was feeling a bit self-conscious about it.

Is that a problem ? He asked with a raised eyebrow. The tattoo ?

Not really, she shrugged. I don’t really see it, most of the time, you know. It’s just kind of funny, when you think about it.

Right, he hummed. So… You’re not too stressed out about tomorrow ?

I don’t know, she said. It’s still weird but, realistically speaking, I don’t have anything to worry about, right ?

Of course not, he said.

I’ll be fine, then, she replied. I guess I’m curious, though.

About what ? He asked with his eyebrows furrowed.

About her, she said. You had a complicated relationship with her.

That’s one way to put it, he said. But, you know, as far as I’m concerned, she’s more like an old friend, and I know it’s the same for her. I’m just good old annoying Marshall. So, really, you have nothing to worry about.

I know, she said with a smile. And when I start freaking out about it, I remember that you’re not married to her anymore.

She was smiling softly, visibly at peace with the situation. That was encouraging and a good sign for the next day’s celebrations. However, he was starting to feel his anxiety rise once again. Right when he thought everything was getting back to normal and that he could enjoy Thanksgiving in peace, his past had to come and bite him in the ass. Y/N was looking at him lovingly and he could not find it in himself to contradict her. The only problem was, by saying nothing, he was lying to her face. He was still very much married to Kim.

#eminem #marshall mathers #slim shady #eminem fanfiction #recovery fanfiction #eminem x reader #eminem fluff #marshall mathers x reader #marshall mathers imagine #eminem imagine

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beautification-tales · 2 days

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The Caregiver

An Outbreak story

Sandra was concerned about her stepson Jim. She is certain he has the virus. The symptoms had been there for three days now: Complete physical changes along with mental ones. Jim seemed more aggressive lately and more irritable. She was so tempted to call the authorities but was scared of what experiments they would do to her sweet boy.

“You can’t keep me cooped inside forever Sandra!” Jim growled. He paced back and forth, his eyes burning with anger. Sandra stood her ground, her expression calm but firm. “Jim, baby you’re sick! If people find out you have the virus.. they’ll put you in a research facility. You know that right?” She took a step closer, reaching out to touch his arm. But he flinched away, his fists clenched at his sides.

He looked at his stepmother as some clarity returned to his mind. He unclenched his fists and sighed. “I’m sorry mom. It’s so hard to think lately… All I want to do is…” Jim looked at his mother with compassion but with a hunger she never saw before. “What is it baby?” she asked softly, taking another step closer. Jim stepped back fighting the natural urges the virus had brought forth. “It’s nothing mom… I just need to be alone.”

Jim walked swiftly and ran up the stairs. Sandra heard her stepson’s door close behind him. Santa looked over at their family portrait in the middle of the living room. “Oh Jack! How am I going to protect him?” Sandra was scared as her sweet nerdy stepson had returned a different man. Sandra had always been afraid of losing Jim ever since Jack passed away. Now the fear was exacerbated by his current… ailment.

Sandra placed her hand on her heart as she felt it beating fast. It was from fear but it was also from her stepson’s presence. She looked at the picture of Jack and how strong and handsome he was. Jim looked so much like him now and it was affecting her.

Sandra turned on the television as the news was still talking about the outbreak. The anchor was discussing the news with their health correspondent. “Yes it has spread throughout Asia and it is confirmed to have hit Australia.” The correspondent said with a grave expression. Sandra felt a chill run down her spine. She could feel the weight of the situation pressing down on her shoulders. “And what about the flight that landed in LAX? The one with the two ehhh affected flight attendants?” The anchor asked cautiously. Sandra knew that flight well. It was the one that Jim had taken to come from a school trip just 4 days ago. “Well it seems to have transformed them into blonde…. And I’m sorry to say… bimbos. They have insatiable libidos and irresistible pheromones. The good news is the strain they have is not airborne and only transferred by fluids. They seemed to have only transferred the virus to the two pilots of the plane.” The correspondent explained. “Thank you Dr. Mullin. We remind our viewers if you notice any physical or mental changes in any of your friends or family please isolate them and call the proper authorities. When we come back more ‘outbreak’ coverage.” The anchor said as the screen cut to a commercial break.

Sandra turned off the television and sighed. She rubbed her temples as she slowly walked up the stairs. She decided to check on her stepson. The sound of grunts and slapping came from his room. Sandra shook her head knowing the sound of her son masturbating. Sandra turned to walk to her room but stopped when she heard Jim scream “mom!” Sandra rushed quickly to her son’s call. She opened the door to find her son still pleasing his engorged cock. Sandra gasped as she realized the extent of Jim’s transformation.

Jim’s body was covered in shapely muscle as his abs flexed as his hips gyrated into his hand. The room’s scent was strong as it was filled with the smell of sweat and cum. Sandra inhaled deeply and felt herself become wet with desire. Sandra looked higher and saw that Jim had a pair of her pantyhose covering his eyes and nose. “Ung mom, yes suck my cock like that.” Jim panted as Sandra felt herself walking closer to her son.

She found herself at the foot of the bed as she licked her lips. The temptation to touch her own stepson was great. “Yes, you’re gonna make me cum!” Jim’s cock erupted as streams of cum landed everywhere. Sandra quickly exited as her son uncovered his face and cleaned himself off.

Sandra rushed into her room and closed her door. She could feel her heart racing as the images were fresh in her mind. Jim’s toned body covered in sweat as he called for her. Jim holding her pantyhose to his face. He must have imagined herself sitting on him. He was so large and he came so much. “No! Stop it!” Sandra said out loud hoping to silence her naughty thoughts.

Sandra knew that Jim wasn’t her own but she practically raised him. Jack found her as a lonely young woman longing for a family. She remembered fondly the first time Jack introduced Jim to her as a young boy ten years old all that time ago. He hugged her tightly as she felt her eyes fill with tears. Sandra knew then she had found her family and she would never let anyone take it from her.

“I have to call the authorities…. For Jim’s sake.” Sandra muttered to herself as she prepared to take a shower. She reached down to undo her jeans. She gasped as felt a wet spot on her pocket. “Oh my God… is that his cum?” Sandra felt awkward as the substance covered her fingers. She played with it a bit as it felt very sticky. She smelled it as her whole body reacted. Sandra’s eyes rolled back as she felt goosebumps and her nipples hardened. She began licking her fingers as it tasted like sweet honey in her mouth. She began sucking her fingers until she realized what she was doing. She undressed and showered with cold water before hitting the bed.

“I know you want me to Sandra.” Jim said at the foot of her bed. Sandra jumped up as she saw Jim naked stroking his hard manhood. “Jim you know I hate it when you call me… Jim stop that!” Jim laughed as he walked closer to her. His body glistening with sweat, his muscles bulging under his tight skin. He smelled intoxicating, a mixture of sex and desire. She wanted to resist but couldn't find the strength. “C’mon mom you promised to take care of me when dad died. Let’s take care of each other.” Jim said as he climbed on the bed and straddled her. His thick cock pointed at her lips. Sandra felt her heart race as she opened her mouth and took him in. Jim moaned loudly as she began to suck him off. His sweet taste filled her mouth and she couldn't help but swallow.

Sandra awoke from her dream drenched in sweat as she tried to catch her breath. Her body ached as she was tempted to touch herself. She stopped herself as in a trance she got up and disrobed her pajamas. She put on her black lace bra and panties and her thigh high stockings. An outfit she hadn’t worn since Jack’s passing and walked to Jim’s bedroom.

Sandra opened the door and found Jim tossing and turning in bed. He was naked, his muscular body covered in sweat. The sheets were tangled around his legs, and he was moaning softly in his sleep. Her heart raced as she took a step closer to the bed. She reached out and gently ran her hand through his sweaty hair, causing him to stir slightly. She leaned down and kissed his forehead, her lips lingering there for a moment before pulling back.

"Jimmy?" she whispered, her voice trembling slightly. He didn't respond, still lost in his dreams. Sandra climbed onto the bed, straddling his hips, and laid her head on his chest. His heartbeat thundered in her ears, matching her own racing pulse. She could feel the heat radiating off of him, and the scent of his skin filled her nostrils. She wrapped her arms around him, holding him tightly, feeling the warmth of his skin against her own.

She let her fingers wander, tracing the lines of his abs, teasing the hairs on his chest. Jim moaned softly, his body tensing beneath her touch. She leaned forward, capturing one of his nipples between her teeth, gently biting down. He cried out, his hips bucking upwards, seeking contact with her. She released his nipple, feeling the hard peak beneath her fingertips as it stood at attention.

Her heart raced, her breath coming faster as she leaned forward, her lips brushing against his ear. "You feel so good, Jimmy," she whispered, her voice husky. "So alive." She slid her hand lower, over his abdomen and toward his hip. Her fingers found the soft cotton of his boxers, tracing the outline of his erection through the fabric. "Let me help you feel better," she breathed, her hand moving lower still, reaching beneath the fabric and grasping him firmly.

Jim awoke and quickly jerked up. He looked around confused before focusing on his mother. "Mom?" he said, his voice thick with desire. Sandra smiled softly, her eyes locked on his erection. "You're so big," she breathed, running her hand up and down his shaft. "So hard." She leaned forward, taking him into her mouth, sucking gently at first before deepening the kiss, her tongue swirling around the head of his cock. Jim's hips bucked, pushing deeper into her mouth as he moaned loudly.

Sandra increased speed as her head jerked up and down on Jim’s cock. His hips began to thrust forward, meeting her movements with an urgency that she hadn't expected. His moans filled the room, mixing with her own wet, slurping sounds as she sucked him deeper. She could feel his hot seed building in his veins, ready to explode. “Yes please taste my cum!” he gasped, his voice hoarse.

With one last powerful thrust, Jim came, his seed erupting from his cock and splashing onto the back of her throat. Sandra swallowed eagerly, savoring the salty taste as it filled her mouth. Jim collapsed back onto the bed, his chest heaving as he fought for air. Sandra slowly pulled her mouth away, her lips still wet with his cum, and looked up at him.

“You taste so good. Ahhhh” Sandra moaned as she felt her body shake. The virus flowed into her as her older skin tightened and gained a more youthful color. The crows feet under eyes vanished as she felt her breasts firm up. She grabbed them and felt them grow in her hands. Her graying blond hair gained its vibrant blond color of her youth. Sandra’s back arched as she felt her ass grow. The stockings stretched as her thighs got a bit thicker and her calves got strong. She stood on her toes as her foot arch returned to her dancing form. She felt her tight abdomen as she smiled remembering how men desired her. She was even better than how she was then and an even more handsome man than Jack was before her.

Jim felt his cock come back to attention as he saw his mom become even hotter than she was. Jim was always attracted to her but the virus had made his desires impossible to ignore. “Damn Sandra you’re smoking hot.” Sandra with lightning speed jumped on Jim as she guided his hard member into her wet pussy. She began gyrating as Jim fell back on the bed paralyzed by pleasure. “What did I say about calling me that? I’m mommy baby” she moaned as she squeezed her inner muscles around him. Jim moaned as he felt every inch of her tight, wet heat envelop him. He thrust into her, meeting her rhythm, their skin slapping together in perfect harmony.

Jim finally looked up and caressed her body freeing her breasts from her bra. “Yes mommy. Ungh you feel so good.” Sandra moaned as she felt his hands on her. She reached down and held his wrists, guiding them up above his head, pinning him down as she continued to ride him. Jim felt helpless and utterly at her mercy, his hips bucking uselessly against the bed.

Sandra grabbed Jim’s hands and placed them on her hosiery covered thighs. Jim groaned loudly as he felt his cock twitch. “You like when mommy wears these?” she asked, her voice husky with desire. Jim nodded weakly, his hips moving involuntarily against the bed. She smiled down at him, her eyes flashing with lust. With a swift motion, she slid her hand down between their bodies and began rubbing her clit as she continued to ride him.

Her other hand moved up to cup his face, her thumb tracing circles around his lips. Jim opened his mouth, eager to taste her as she leaned down and brushed their lips together. Their tongues tangled, their breath mixing as they shared the sensation of her body moving against his.

Sandra arched her back, her nails digging into his chest as her orgasm washed over her. She cried out, her body shuddering with pleasure as she came. Jim felt her walls squeeze tight around him, her muscles contracting in the most exquisite way. His own release followed close behind, his seed spilling deep inside her as he groaned.

They both collapsed on the bed as their morals disappeared and their desires increased.

“I was so wrong to keep you cooped up here in the house. I better let you go back to school baby.”

1 week later

Jim was brought into the research facility when a student called the CDC. Apparently Jim couldn’t recall how many students he had sex with. The CDC began testing students to see who was infected and found them all. The virus was contained.

“Sir, he did spend time home before coming back to school. Should we test the mother too?”

“Negative, the virus is only transmitted via fluids. He wouldn’t fuck his mom.”

And so the virus spread.

#beautification #transformation #f2f transformation #breast expansion #bimboification #origin stories #ass expansion #beauty is power #virus #mind corruption #stepmom

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lov3rgirllll · 1 day

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you deserve better than that

now playing: 'eta'- new jeans

Percy Jackson x y/n (platonic) Clarisse la rue x y/n

A/N: whys y/n kinda iris coded in this???

Sypnosis: Percy just cant wrap his head around the fact that you, the sweetest girl in camp, was dating Clarisse la rue, the meanest

you were like Percy's older sister. from the moment he arrived at camp you were sweet on him. you sat with him at the cabin 3 table when he was alone, you baked blue chocolate cookies for him whenever he felt homesick or just missed his mom, and you even helped him pack whenever he had a quest. So when he found out that you were dating Clarisse, his biggest hater, he almost exploded. Clarisse was the complete opposite from you, from even before the moment he arrived from camp, Clarisse hated Percy, she attempted to dunk his head in a toilet, constantly picked on him, and picked him to spar against her just to beat his ass. why on earth would should a sweet girl like you want to date such a horrible girl like her?

"why do you even like her? she's a menace" you and Percy sat at the cabin 3 table, even though Percy has Tyson as his company at the table now, you and him had a lot to catch up on, especially your relationship with Clarisse. "a lot has changed since you left Percy, clary is not a menace, she's just a troubled kid like all half-bloods are, you just seem to be a major outlet for her anger that's all." all Percy paid attention to in your little speech was the nickname you called her, 'clary'. it swim through his brain. the way you said it with ease made him feel sick. the nickname made her seem nice in a way. like he could see her like how you saw her through your eyes. it made him want to gag a little. " i just don't understand how you could like someone who's so mean to me" he pouted a little, seeming genuinely hurt. all these people at camp and you just had to pick her. " oh Percy, it isn't that simple, maybe one day you'll understand" you glanced at Annabeth, but Percy didn't seem to notice. "love!" Tyson suddenly shouted which made Percy jump a bit, as it didn't seem he was listening to your conversation . "yes Tyson, love" you gave him a loving smile and patted his hand

⋆ ˚｡⋆౨ৎ˚the end⋆ ˚｡⋆౨ৎ˚

#clarisse my beloved #clarisse la rue #clarisse pjo #clarisse x reader #clarisse x you #percy jackson #pjo

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cowboysandpilots · 2 days

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Secrets of a 30-Year-Old Flyboy — ch. 3

Fake Roonix, Secret Hangster | Words: 780 | Warnings: Blood, medical stuff, sickness, miscommunications, and boys being stupid.

"They said he had a dangerously high fever, and his appendix burst. That's all I got before they rushed him into surgery." Tears had gathered in the blue eyes behind glasses but he was trying to hold them back, keeping up appearances. Bradley had looked so similar to after the accident, blood on his face and unconscious.

Stepping closer, Mav wrapped his arm around Ice’s waist and leaned into his side. He held him tightly. Mav knew what Ice was remembering. “It’s not like that this time,” he murmured to him. “Appendixes happen all the time. It’s routine surgery.” Maverick didn’t voice that he was worried about the fact that Bradley had been in the air. He’d been sustaining G-force pressures with a bad appendix. What kind of damage did that do? He knew it was normal for the average person, but this wasn’t normal. Because, of course, nothing had to be normal about Bradley.

Phoenix shooed the squadron to take seats. She focused on them to give her something to do while being sick with worry. The least she could do was make everyone give Bradley’s Godfathers some privacy. She felt awful because she had teased Bradley in the locker room instead of asking how he was doing. She’d seen that he didn’t feel good.

While everyone else took a seat, Jake hadn’t been able to do so. He stood off to the side, with his back pressed against the wall. He couldn’t stop the fine tremors that were running through him or the waves of dizziness. "It's not like last time." Ice repeats with a nod, exactly like Bradley would do when he was trying to convince himself of something. A mannerism that he must've picked up from the other man.

"What happened last time?" Bob asks, clearly listening and not reading the room.

Phoenix tried to shush Bob, flapping a hand in his face. “Not now, dude,” she hissed. She knew a little bit about the accident, just a few things Bradley had said or that she figured out.

Maverick turned his glower to Bob. All of his sour attitude from earlier returned full force and once again focused on the entire squadron. “There was an accident,” he said, voice clipped. “Now keep your noses to yourself about it.”

"Sorry," Bob says softly, immediately backing down and looking away like a little kid getting scolded by their father.

It's about 5 minutes later when they're all sitting in the waiting room. A nurse makes his way to Ice and pulls him off to the side. "Sir, your son came in with these on around his neck. We had to remove them for the surgery and want to make sure they're kept safe." She explains, handing two sets of dog tags to the admiral.

Accepting both sets of dog tags, Ice frowned and looked down at them in his hand. He rolled them until he could see the stamped text. Bradley’s and…Seresin’s? He frowned as he turned his attention back to the nurse. “Thank you,” he said, glancing down at the tags again. “He was wearing both sets?” Ice can’t help but ask, not understanding what was going on with this at all. It was bad enough that Bradley was in surgery. He couldn’t focus on much beyond his worry.

"Yes, sir. They were both around his neck when he came in." She places a gentle hand on his arm. "I'll be back to give you updates on the surgery when I have them."

Nodding, Ice looks back down at the tags in his hand before he steps away. “Thank you,” he says again before he returns to Maverick’s side. Sitting heavily in the chair next to his husband, Iceman stares at the tags in his hand for a moment longer before he shifts and slides them into his pocket. He glances at where Hangman is leaning against a wall on the opposite side of the room before he turns his attention back to Maverick. “No update yet,” he said with a heavy sigh. “She just wanted to give me his tags, for safekeeping. And Seresin’s as well. Bradley was wearing them.”

Maverick turns and blinks at his husband. "I'm sorry... what did you just say?" He frowns.

“You heard me,” Ice said dryly as he leaned back in his chair and took Maverick’s hand in his own. There was a fine tremor in Ice’s hands that he was trying to hide from everyone else. “He was also wearing Hangman’s dog tags.”

Maverick is absolutely stunned, speechless. "But he... they..." He clears his throat a little. "Are you sure they're not Phoenix's dog tags?" He asks quietly.

——

I wanted to make this one longer but I forgot about Tumblrs stupid text limit. 😭 Thanks for reading! 💕 Donate to my food fund if you want. 🥰

#hangster #jake hangman seresin #bradley rooster bradshaw #tgm #top gun: maverick #sereshaw #hangster fanfiction #hangster fic #rooster x hangman #icemav #natasha phoenix trace #robert bob floyd #javy coyote machado #mickey fanboy garcia #reuben payback fitch #my writing

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roscoe-me-and-this-fuckin-kid · 1 year

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#'what fanfiction op' u know its throam #yes my parents are crazy right-wingers ty for noticing no i'm not ok #my mom is more chill than my dad but still pretty right wing. had to ask her if she voted trump both times for this poll #she said yes but that she felt sick doing it #my dad was a rush limbaugh stan he used to blast that freak's radio show at top volume every single morning over summer break #he literally almost died after catching covid and is permanently disabled bc of it but still denies that it's dangerous

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softshuji · 5 months

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eldest daughter syndrome really do be kicking my ass tbh

#i just find it like so unfair yknow #im the only one who works in myhouse and full time #but i come home and the house isnt clean and i tidy up and sort everything out and tidy the kitchen anf living room after dinner and put #my sister to bed and yk if there was no one else to do these things id understand but #i have 5 brothers all of whom are adults and they dont lift a finger #its not as if any of them work bec they dont and neither does my dad #and im so so so exhausted yk? bec not everything is my job or responsibility #and i keep blaming other things for me getting sick but yknow what maybe i just dont rest enough #and the other day i was upset bec i'd had a tough day at work and i felt unwell and i cleaned up everything after dinner and my brother #said i didnt have a right to be upset bec i “chose” this. like as if i chose to work full time nd do all the chores for a family of 9 #and it just really upsets me bec no one sees an issue with it and im so mad at my mom at rhe same time #constant therapy sessions w her bec shes mad at my dad and wants someone to vent at and then he does the same abt her and my brothers #and im so tired yknow just sososos tired bec she'll complain abt how they dont do anything but then she wont ensure they do either #its just empty complaints whereas she thrust responsibility on me when i was 9 and yet my brothers are 18+ - all but one that is and they #cant even do their own laundry bec she just..... did everything for them all the time but now is mad that they cant do anything.#like yes i know my dad is a failure of a husband and a father i expected that i'll never be a good enough daughter for him and that the onl #thing he has to say about me is that im bringing shame on our family despite everything ive done but come on #im just tired and upset #its hard not to see yourself as a robot or machine when theres little room to be anything else.#and even on a day like today when i dont feel well it never stops and i just keep doing #im sad i want a hug from my gangster bf #oh god i am sorry pls do not perceive me for this #and yk what #thats why i cant stand when people are nice to me bec all i can think of is #i havent done anything to deserve this? i should have to give something in return #or if not #theres something this person must want because why else would they be nice to me when i havent done anything for them #i cannot fathom the concept that someone just wants me because its me #its literally just not possible why would anyone fo that for me

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reasonsforhope · 5 months

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No paywall version here.

"Two and a half years ago, when I was asked to help write the most authoritative report on climate change in the United States, I hesitated...

In the end, I said yes, but reluctantly. Frankly, I was sick of admonishing people about how bad things could get. Scientists have raised the alarm over and over again, and still the temperature rises. Extreme events like heat waves, floods and droughts are becoming more severe and frequent, exactly as we predicted they would. We were proved right. It didn’t seem to matter.

Our report, which was released on Tuesday, contains more dire warnings. There are plenty of new reasons for despair. Thanks to recent scientific advances, we can now link climate change to specific extreme weather disasters, and we have a better understanding of how the feedback loops in the climate system can make warming even worse. We can also now more confidently forecast catastrophic outcomes if global emissions continue on their current trajectory.

But to me, the most surprising new finding in the Fifth National Climate Assessment is this: There has been genuine progress, too.

I’m used to mind-boggling numbers, and there are many of them in this report. Human beings have put about 1.6 trillion tons of carbon in the atmosphere since the Industrial Revolution — more than the weight of every living thing on Earth combined. But as we wrote the report, I learned other, even more mind-boggling numbers. In the last decade, the cost of wind energy has declined by 70 percent and solar has declined 90 percent. Renewables now make up 80 percent of new electricity generation capacity. Our country’s greenhouse gas emissions are falling, even as our G.D.P. and population grow.

In the report, we were tasked with projecting future climate change. We showed what the United States would look like if the world warms by 2 degrees Celsius. It wasn’t a pretty picture: more heat waves, more uncomfortably hot nights, more downpours, more droughts. If greenhouse emissions continue to rise, we could reach that point in the next couple of decades. If they fall a little, maybe we can stave it off until the middle of the century. But our findings also offered a glimmer of hope: If emissions fall dramatically, as the report suggested they could, we may never reach 2 degrees Celsius at all.

For the first time in my career, I felt something strange: optimism.

And that simple realization was enough to convince me that releasing yet another climate report was worthwhile.

Something has changed in the United States, and not just the climate. State, local and tribal governments all around the country have begun to take action. Some politicians now actually campaign on climate change, instead of ignoring or lying about it. Congress passed federal climate legislation — something I’d long regarded as impossible — in 2022 as we turned in the first draft.

[Note: She's talking about the Inflation Reduction Act and the Infrastructure Act, which despite the names were the two biggest climate packages passed in US history. And their passage in mid 2022 was a big turning point: that's when, for the first time in decades, a lot of scientists started looking at the numbers - esp the ones that would come from the IRA's funding - and said "Wait, holy shit, we have an actual chance."]

And while the report stresses the urgency of limiting warming to prevent terrible risks, it has a new message, too: We can do this. We now know how to make the dramatic emissions cuts we’d need to limit warming, and it’s very possible to do this in a way that’s sustainable, healthy and fair.

The conversation has moved on, and the role of scientists has changed. We’re not just warning of danger anymore. We’re showing the way to safety.

I was wrong about those previous reports: They did matter, after all. While climate scientists were warning the world of disaster, a small army of scientists, engineers, policymakers and others were getting to work. These first responders have helped move us toward our climate goals. Our warnings did their job.

To limit global warming, we need many more people to get on board... We need to reach those who haven’t yet been moved by our warnings. I’m not talking about the fossil fuel industry here; nor do I particularly care about winning over the small but noisy group of committed climate deniers. But I believe we can reach the many people whose eyes glaze over when they hear yet another dire warning or see another report like the one we just published.

The reason is that now, we have a better story to tell. The evidence is clear: Responding to climate change will not only create a better world for our children and grandchildren, but it will also make the world better for us right now.

Eliminating the sources of greenhouse gas emissions will make our air and water cleaner, our economy stronger and our quality of life better. It could save hundreds of thousands or even millions of lives across the country through air quality benefits alone. Using land more wisely can both limit climate change and protect biodiversity. Climate change most strongly affects communities that get a raw deal in our society: people with low incomes, people of color, children and the elderly. And climate action can be an opportunity to redress legacies of racism, neglect and injustice.

I could still tell you scary stories about a future ravaged by climate change, and they’d be true, at least on the trajectory we’re currently on. But it’s also true that we have a once-in-human-history chance not only to prevent the worst effects but also to make the world better right now. It would be a shame to squander this opportunity. So I don’t just want to talk about the problems anymore. I want to talk about the solutions. Consider this your last warning from me."

-via New York Times. Opinion essay by leading climate scientist Kate Marvel. November 18, 2023.

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autismserenity · 3 months

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know someone who enjoys horror stories? share this one! it's true!

hahahahahahahahahaha aarrggghhhhhhhhhh 3,000,000 deaths due to COVID-19 last year. Globally. Three million. Case rates higher than 90% of the rest of the pandemic. The reason people are still worried about COVID is because it has a way of quietly fucking up your body. And the risk is cumulative.

I'm going to say that again: the risk is cumulative.

It's not just that a lot of people get bad long-term effects from it. One in seven or so? Enough that it's kind of the Russian Roulette of diseases. It's also that the more times you get it, the higher that risk becomes. Like if each time you survived Russian Roulette, the empty chamber was removed from the gun entirely. The worst part is that, psychologically, we have the absolute opposite reaction. If we survive something with no ill effects, we assume it's pretty safe. It is really, really hard to override that sense of, "Ok, well, I got it and now I probably have a lot of immunity and also it wasn't that bad." It is not a respiratory disease. Airborne, yes. Respiratory disease, no: not a cold, not a flu, not RSV.

Like measles (or maybe chickenpox?), it starts with respiratory symptoms. And then it moves to other parts of your body. It seems to target the lungs, the digestive system, the heart, and the brain the most.

It also hits the immune system really hard - a lot of people are suddenly more susceptible to completely unrelated viruses. People get brain fog, migraines, forget things they used to know.

(I really, really hate that it can cross the blood-brain barrier. NOTHING SHOULD EVER CROSS THE BLOOD-BRAIN BARRIER IT IS THERE FOR A REASON.) Anecdotal examples of this shit are horrifying. I've seen people talk about coworkers who've had COVID five or more times, and now their work... just often doesn't make sense? They send emails that say things like, "Sorry, I didn't mean Los Angeles, I meant Los Angeles."

Or they insist they've never heard of some project that they were actually in charge of a year or two before.

Or their work is just kind of falling apart, and they don't seem to be aware of it.

People talk about how they don't want to get the person in trouble, so their team just works around it. Or they describe neighbors and relatives who had COVID repeatedly, were nearly hospitalized, talked about how incredibly sick they felt at the time... and now swear they've only had it once and it wasn't bad, they barely even noticed it.

(As someone who lived with severe dissociation for most of my life, this is a genuinely terrifying idea to me. I've already spent my whole life being like, "but what if I told them that already? but what if I did do that? what if that did happen to me and I just don't remember?") One of its known effects in the brain is to increase impulsivity and risk-taking, which is real fucking convenient honestly. What a fantastic fucking mutation. So happy for it on that one. Yes, please make it seem less important to wear a mask and get vaccinated. I'm not screaming internally at all now.

I saw a tweet from someone last year whose family hadn't had COVID yet, who were still masking in public, including school.

She said that her son was no kind of an athlete. Solidly bottom middle of the pack in gym.

And suddenly, this year, he was absolutely blowing past all the other kids who had to run the mile. He wasn't running any faster. His times weren't fantastic or anything. It's just that the rest of the kids were worse than him now. For some reason. I think about that a lot. (Like my incredibly active six-year-old getting a cold, and suddenly developing post-viral asthma that looked like pneumonia.

He went back to school the day before yesterday, after being home for a month and using preventative inhalers for almost week.

He told me that it was GREAT - except that he couldn't run as much at recess, because he immediately got really tired. Like how I went outside with him to do some yard work and felt like my body couldn't figure out how to increase breathing and heart rate.

I wasn't physically out of breath, but I felt like I was out of breath. That COVID feeling people describe, of "I'm not getting enough air." Except that I didn't have that problem when I had COVID.) Some people don't observe any long (or medium) term side effects after they have it.

But researchers have found viral reservoirs of COVID-19 in everyone they've studied who had it.

It just seems to hang out, dormant, for... well, longer than we've had an opportunity to observe it, so far.

(I definitely watched that literal horror movie. I think that's an entire genre. The alien dormant under ice in the Arctic.)

(oh hey I don't like that either!!!!!!!!!) All of which is to explain why we should still care about avoiding it, and how it manages to still cause excess deaths. Measuring excess deaths has been a standard tool in public health for a long time.

We know how many people usually die from all different causes, every year. So we can tell if, for example, deaths from heart disease have gone way up in the past three years, and look for reasons. Those are excess deaths: deaths that, four years ago, would not have happened. During the pandemic, excess death rates have been a really important tool. For all sorts of reasons. Like, sometimes people die from COVID without ever getting tested, and the official cause is listed as something else because nobody knows they had COVID. But also, people are dying from cardiovascular illness much younger now.

People are having strokes and heart attacks younger, and more often, than they did before the pandemic started. COVID causes a lot of problems. And some of those problems kill people. And some of them make it easier for other things to kill us. Lung damage from COVID leading to lungs collapsing, or to pneumonia, or to a pulmonary embolism, for example. The Economist built a machine-learning model with a 95% confidence interval that gauges excess death statistics around the world, to tell them what the true toll of the ongoing COVID pandemic has been so far.

Total excess deaths globally in 2023: Three million.

3,000,000.

Official COVID-19 deaths globally so far: Seven million. 7,000,000. Total excess deaths during COVID so far: Thirty-five point two million. 35,200,000.

Five times as many.

That's bad. I don't like that at all. I'm glad last year was less than a tenth of that. I'm not particularly confident about that continuing, though, because last year we started a period of really high COVID transmission. Case rates higher than 90% of the rest of the pandemic. Here's their data, and charts you can play with, and links to detailed information on how they did all of this:

Here's a non-paywalled link to it:

https://archive.vn/2024.01.26-012536/https://www.economist.com/graphic-detail/coronavirus-excess-deaths-estimates

Oh: here's a link to where you can buy comfy, effective N95 masks in all sizes:

Those ones are about a buck each after shipping - about $30 for a box of 30. They also have sample packs for a dollar, so you can try a couple of different sizes and styles.

You can wear an N95 mask for about 40 total hours before the effectiveness really drops, so that's like a dollar for a week of wear.

They're also family-owned and have cat-shaped masks and I really love them. These ones are cuter and in a much wider range of colors, prints, and styles, but they're also more expensive; they range from $1.80 to $3 for a mask. ($18-$30 for a box of ten.)

#covid isn't over #covid 19 #disability rights #disability advocacy #wear a mask #covid conscious #covid cautious #mask up #wall of words #public health #health care

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jinkiezzsstuff · 2 months

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At First Sight PT2

Alastor x doe!reader

PART ONE PART 3

this is a short part 2 to a request, tbh i didn’t think about continuing it before so i struggled a bit and it’s quite short! i’m so sorry gang ;-; i hope it satiates yall if not lemme know what i can cook up for you

Warnings: love sick alastor + reader, ooc alastor, mates/soulmate trope, mentions of reproduction and pregnancy (dw yall i didn’t do the no no there is no pregnancy it’s just mentioned bc it supposed to be gn), short short, swearing, not proof read, hmmmm i think that’s it lmk whatcha think

wee little taglist for the people who asked kiss kiss: @fairyv-ice @chirimeimei

Tucked underneath Alastors chin you laid comfortably alongside him in bed. You’d been awake awhile now tail thumping softly behind you as you watched the demon sleep his smiled soft and barely showing. He laid in pyjama bottoms only chest bare and on display for you. You absentmindedly traced the scars along his torso feeling him respond with goosebumps every now and again.

“Goodmorning my doe,” Alastors voice rang out, killing the silence. It was shocking to hear his static gone and his regular voice out on display, dripped in sleepy sultry. “Good morning my buck.” You reply sickeningly sweet while crawling up to lean over his face, his eyes were lidded now gazing at you with a loving look in his eyes.

“Did you sleep well?” You asked playing with the stray hair that swept across his face. “Indeed darling very well. I should be good for several days.” He chirped happily, ears flicking. “We should head down, i need to talk to Charlie.” You say with a grimace.

Last night when Charlie caught you and Al, you felt guilty, you knew Charlie was a sweetheart but you practically abandoned her all day for Alastor, then scared her silly with a deal and sex! Groaning you grab your head while Alastor stood. With a snap of his fingers the two of you were dressed, and that did take a load of stress of you. “Come now my doe, I’ll be there the whole time, no shame and if there is we’ll be ashamed together!”

Alastor seemed pretty bright in his exclamation holding his arm out to you. Obviously you trusted Al you gave yourself and soul to him and only him just last night. So while attached at the arm the two of you trotted downstairs.

Arriving downstairs interlocked you were both greeted by all the patrons already in the living area next to the bar. Charlie was the first to make a noise gasping, meanwhile Angel was practically vibrating in his seat. Just as Angel was about to talk Vaggie interrupted. “You made a fucking deal!?” Screamed the fallen angel, hands thrown behind her as the rest of her body lurched forward. Frowning you bit your lip, of course this was gonna be an awkward conversation with Charlie, but with the whole hotel listening. Even worse!

“Neva mind that Vagina! Let’s talk about the real stuff. How big? Seven? Eight? Twelve?! Ouch-“ Vaggie knocked Angel over the head with the back of her spear. “Yikes alright, twelve is greedy…. ten?” Angel whispered cackling at Vaggie who growled at her. Alastor, obviously unhappy, began to crackle with static, black shadows oozing out from the floor and encompassing the room slowly.

At the sight of Alastor’s figure demonically stretching the room fell silent, you only gazed up at the deer slightly aroused by his stature and the way his antlers screwed out like branches. “You’re quite the sight.” You say dreamily, barely even noticing you spoke to begin with, Alastor’s head cracked down to you. Coming back to himself Alastor hummed out adoringly, petting your head but wanting to kiss you, unfortunately that was a step too far for him right now.

“Uhm anyway, YN, can you please tell me about the deal?” Charlie begged worry on her face as she looked to you and Alastor. You felt the guilt crawl at you again. “I… well I’m not sure why but there’s just this pull i have to Alastor, he asked me to be his i said yes i…” You veered off feeling too embarrassed by all the eyes, thankfully Alastor pulled you in theatrically waving his microphone around, taking the attention off you.

“Well this lovely doe was just made for me you see? I’m perfectly capable of protecting such a divine creature and though I don't doubt your ability, princess I'd feel a lot more comfortable being the one to do so.” Alastor fired off sounding like a proper radio host as he did so. Charlie looked confused but then perked up happily.

“This is thee perfect redeeming quality Alastor, love is so pure! This is great!” As Charlie felt giddy, Vaggie felt suspicious eyeing the red demon. “So what did you even sell- what was the deal?” You hummed tapping your finger to your lip; well you didn’t know, just that you gave yourself to him.

Looking up to Alastor for help here he happily obliged. “Worry not you angry little woman,” Alastor replied, pinching Vaggies cheek, her angrily pushing him off. “The contract was nothing greater than marriage.” The entire room, yourself included, was surprised at this. You knew this was a soul binding contract, but for him to make that connection on his own was well to you sweet as ever. Your tail flicked happily behind you as you looked to Alastor who returned to your side.

Charlie was as equally as happy as you were, but Vaggie and Husk kept within the same boat of apprehension. “Why so suddenly?” Asked Vaggie again, but Alastor shrugged her off. “I’m unsure dear, just that i couldn’t resist this little doe. Like fate.” Alastor pondered meanwhile you briefly seethed at Alastor for referring to Vaggie as dear.

“Maybe it’s like some soulmate bullshit between deer?” Angel pipped up, putting in his required two cents. Husk groaned at that, but Charlie squeaked jumping up. “That is totally possible! It happened with my dad! Well, y’know in the beginning.” Charlie chuckled, brushing her hair behind her ear. Alastor shook his head rapidly a soft laugh echoing out of him.

“No way dear, how is that possible?” He mocked bopping Charlie atop the head with his mic, you again weren’t happy hearing him call another demon dear, but you let it fly. “Well you both are deer, could it be instinctual?” Charlie reasoned her pitch, giving away her uncertainty.

You hummed looking up towards Alastor to see him already looking down to you. “I think Alastor and I would need to talk about it privately before we have a group conversation about it. It’s kinda of embarrassing.” You admit already tired of the discussion. Charlie however didn’t like the idea of not having an answer, so with a plan in mind she turned to Vaggie. “Vaggie can you take them to the library, maybe look some stuff up online? We need to figure this out.” Charlie asked giving Vaggie a look that conveyed this was more of a do this rather than a can you do this.

Nodding her head Vaggie looked at you, who looked at Alastor. Alastor shrugged and muttered he didn’t see the issue, so long as you were safe. So you and Vaggie headed off, meanwhile Charlie calmly asked to speak with Alastor in private.

Alone in Alastor’s radio tower, Charlie sat on one side of the broadcasting table while Alastor sat behind it, tunes playing out of him. “So Al,” Charlie started breathing out a deep breath. “Can you please tell me what’s going on with the deal, listen i can’t have them get hurt! I’ll even make a deal.” Charlie said sadly gazing off, she didn’t want to make a deal, but she would.

Alastor watched her, and pitied her odd behaviour. Resting his chin on his hand Alastor sat quietly for a moment, Charlie waiting with a hopeful gleam in her eyes. “It was nothing malicious that i can assure you. Although, i’m not sure what happened between them and myself, I felt pretty agressive in my feelings to protect them. Of course that private moment between us should’ve stayed private,” Alastors words were stern as he glared down at Charlie who shrunk bashfully in her seat.

“But suppose since you know i will confess in that moment of intensity, i did the only thing I knew how to do to my dear. I’m not particularly good with emotions, and so I simply ensured I’d have them with a deal.” Tapping his nails on the desk Alastor kept his composure but inside he was scolding himself for even letting that much truth out. Charlie seemed to like the sound of that though, nodding her head in agreement.

“So you won’t, and you don’t have any plans to hurt them?” Alastors ears pinned back subconsciously, he didn’t enjoy being accused of cruelty when it came to you, and he didn’t know he could be any more truthful. “My dear i swear, on my mother, not a hair on their pretty doe head, will ever be hurt by me.” Holding his right hand up, head high Alastor watched as Charlie eased into a smile. Nodding at him.

Rejoining the crew downstairs Alastor and Charlie were shocked to see you and Vaggie had returned. “How come you guys are back so quick?” Vaggie turned at the sound of Charlie’s voice, eyes bugged slightly. “Yeah you won’t believe what we found.” Vaggie said handing Charlie a book about demons and mating. Charlie didn’t seem too keen on the book ‘uhs’ immediately falling from her mouth.

You stepped up, opening the book to the checked marked place. “It’s species dependent on how mating affects someone, in this case Doe’s are more of a rarity in hell meaning it was an instinct for the two of us to kinda ‘mate’ or ‘bond’ to one another, as if we had to worry about going extinct.” You scoffed watching as Charlie glazed over the words while listening to you. “Weird. It must be because you’re a hellborn and an angel, so technically you can reproduce.”

A record scratch sounded out from Alastor, the lot of you looking towards his stiff figure. “Don’t worry Al, we’re pretty sure you’re still unable to.” Charlie hushed to him, before giving you a look that told you, she didn’t really know that to be true. You weren’t worried though, almost a hundred percent certain that he would not be able to have children. “Welp, at least now we know that’s a thing,” Angel sighed from the background, Vaggie glaring at him.

Pulling you into his side Alastor grinned his poise returned. “Look at us figuring stuff out why wasn’t this just the teamwork we all needed, good job.” Alastor applauded slightly condescending, but Charlie was happy with it nonetheless giving two thumbs up to you and Alastor.

#hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel imagine #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel oneshots #alastor hazbin x reader #alastor x reader #hazbin hotel alastor x reader #alastor the radio demon #alastor hazbin hotel x reader #alastor x you #hazbin alastor #alastor hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel alastor

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fangswbenefits · 10 months

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Obsession

Summary: Miguel tries to convince himself that his obsession with you was justified, but fails miserably as you spend the night over.

Pairing: Miguel O’Hara x spider-woman!reader

18+. Miguel POV. Obsessed and jealous Miguel. Inexperienced reader. Breeding kink. Sexual tension and frustration. Reader has nipple piercings.

Previous parts: 1 & 2 (you may enjoy this one separately, but might miss out on some context)

Miguel tried to convince himself that adding a mic to your digital suit was purely for safety purposes.

He really did try.

But he couldn’t keep from listening in when you first wore it on your way to the spider cafeteria.

He had just briefed a squad and was monitoring Nueva York through a multitude of hovering screens, as he stood on his platform.

Tapping quickly on the flickering surface, he was able to zoom in on you through the ceiling cameras.

You looked absolutely breathtaking.

The suit fit you like a glove and left little to the imagination. He was proud of his work. You deserved wearing something of his for everyone to see.

He saw you approaching a nearby table, taking a seat. In front of you were Jessica Drew and Peter B. Parker with Mayday who greeted you with warm smiles.

The sound of your voice echoed through the walls around him, as you extended your arms.

“Mayday! Baby! It’s so good to see you!”

The little girl broke into a giggle and began wriggling forward on Peter’s lap to reach you.

You promptly took her in your arms. “Did you miss me? Did you?” your voice was slight high-pitched and you wiggled your fingers, tickling her. “Oh, I have a present for her.”

“Really? That’s so nice of you,” Peter beamed.

“I don’t have it here, but I think she’ll love it,” you said, patting Mayday’s back lightly, earning a genuine hug from her.

Miguel felt his heart clench violently.

You were a natural with kids.

You were just too good to be true and he felt his hands clench tightly.

Would he ever be able to have you? To make you yearn for him? To breed you? To have children with you?

“Wait, is that a… digital suit?” Jessica’s voice cracked through the mic.

You had your back turned to him, so he couldn’t see your face, but he felt the warmth in your voice as you spoke, “It sure is!”

He groaned lowly.

There you were… his sweet girl.

“Who gave it to you?”

“Miguel,” you said with that tenderness he had grown to adore.

He could easily get addicted to you saying his name, and he could only hope that, one day, he might hear it a much more compelling setting.

“Miguel… O’Hara?”

You nodded.

From the screen he could see her exchanging looks with Peter.

“It looks really cool!” Peter smiled enthusiastically, inspecting your sleeves. “Wish he’d offer me one, too.”

Jessica chuckled. “Well, I’ve been here with him for months and he’s never given me one.”

Jessica…

It was to be expected. She was no fool. He had scouted her precisely because she was anything but that.

You had been recruited only three weeks ago, but the hold you had on him was tight. He had never felt this way before with someone else.

You straightened in your seat, as Mayday nibbled on your thumb. “Wait… do you think I should give it back?”

Miguel felt his heart jumpstart and panic build inside him.

“No — no! Jessica,” Perer shot her a glare who merely shrugged, before offering you a kind smile. “It looks great on you. Did you pick the colours?”

“Yes! I’m really happy with the final result,” you said, helping Mayday sit at the edge of the table, as you secured her with both hands. “It was his way of showing gratitute.”

Jessica snapped her fingers after taking a sip of her drink. “You’re helping him out with the portals, right?”

“We’re working on portal stabilisation and reduced motion sickness,” you said and he could almost taste the pride and passion in your voice. “We’re making some progress.”

Miguel had gotten used to the random erections you’d awake from him throughout the day. But this one felt particularly painful.

You were so smart and so devoted. He couldn’t even take credit for the progress, because it was mostly just you.

His sweet and clever girl.

He glanced down at the outline of his strained cock, clicking his tongue.

By the time his eyes settled on the monitor, Jessica had walked away momentarily and he saw Peter lean in.

“Hey… are you and Miguel… a thing?”

Miguel froze.

Mayday proceeded to wrap tiny fingers around some of his locks, tugging lightly.

He wish he could have seen your reaction.

“Oh! No! No… we’re just friends,” you quickly said, waving your hands rapidly. “He’s like a mentor to me, really.”

Anger flared inside him. A friend? A mentor? He knew deep down this made absolute sense, but it still made him seething with rage.

Peter didn’t seem all that convinced, but nodded. “Just wondering. He’s not usually this… kind?”

Miguel felt his fangs threaten to emerge as he gritted his teeth.

There had been nothing kind about him building you a suit. He hadn’t done it out of the goodness of his heart.

He wanted to claim you and this had been the easiest and safest way for now.

“Well, I know he’s a grumpy,” you chuckled with a shrug, as you patted Mayday on the back. “Maybe he’s changing?”

You wouldn’t want him to change. Not really. The level of devotion he had for you was unmatched and nothing you could ever have from someone else.

“Maybe you’re a good influence on him?” Peter concluded, tapping his chin. “As a friend, of course.”

“Peter….” he growled lowly.

“As a friend,” you nodded. “Besides, there’s…” but your voice trailed off.

His erection nearly immediately deflated as dread took over.

There’s what?

He turned up the mic’s volume, but winced instead, as you banged on the table.

You cleared your throat. “Well, gotta go! I have work to do.”

Peter took Mayday back into his lap and chuckled. “Don’t forget her present!”

“I won’t! Wish me luck, though,” you said, crossing your fingers as you started to walk away. “I really need these chips to stop blowing and melting on me!”

“Good luck! Say bye bye, Mayday,” Peter waved his hand, which the little girl promptly mimicked with a giggle.

“Bye, baby!” you beamed.

Miguel had had enough.

He switched off your mic with a tap on his watch.

He really had tried to convince himself that his obsession for you was justified. That is was rooted in more than lust and desire, but he wasn’t so sure anymore.

After you moved to Nueva York, he had you working closely to him on portal stabilisation.

But what had started out as something innocent, soon shifted into something else entirely.

Your company brought him peace and quiet, and ticket his brain just the right way to keep him motivated.

Until it didn’t.

Until you became his torment.

He had let you in his life in the hopes that you let him in yours.

The first time you gave him a boner was when he walked in on you in the lab, wearing nothing but a tank top and a pencil pressed firmly in between your lips, as you moved from screen to screen to check on the update progress.

The worst part? You didn’t even notice how utterly delicious you looked and how he could easily bend you over and take you right there.

No.

You just offered him a sweet smile.

One he hadn’t recovered from ever since.

“Miguel?”

He jolted as the voice snapped him from his torturous thoughts. “What?”

Lyla hovered nearby, eyeing him closely. “Fangs out,” she wiggled her index finger disapprovingly. “Pavitr and Hobie are waiting for you.”

His fangs retracted slowly as he tried to gain his composure back. “Why?”

“Mission?” she quirked an eyebrow.

Right.

“Now?”

“You’re already late.”

He growled, tapping on a few screens hurriedly.

“Oh, and Miguel?”

“What?”

The hologram popped near the screen to his left. “You might want to be more subtle when using her in-suit mic.”

He gave her narrow side-glace. “What do you mean?”

“Just saying,” she said, adjusting her heart-shapped glasses. “You’re not the only tech savvy spider here.”

The door to his apartment swung open at once, and he stepped inside ready to decompress from the tiresome mission.

He had made plans with some of your audio recordings and his hand, hoping that would be enough to easy the pent-up tension that had been looming over year throughout the way.

It was a less than ideal situation, but would have to do for now.

That was until he noticed his living room was lit.

Pacing rapidly he was met with you.

In the middle of a pile of papers and electronic components scattered around the floor, he saw you sitting cross-legged with a pencil danging from your lips, his digital suit clinging tightly to your body.

“What are you doing here?”

Your bead snapped in his direction and the pencil tumbled to the floor. “Miguel! Lyla let me in.”

He was rooted in place.

Had it been someone else, he would have flung them through the window with no warning.

But you weren’t just someone.

And Lyla wouldn’t have let someone else enter his apartment, either.

“It’s quite late,” he said, pacing carefully toward you as not to step on anything. “You could have called me.”

You waved a hand dismissively and held a circular metallic object in the other. “Catch!”

Before he could say anything back, you had tossed it in his direction, which he quickly grabbed in between his fingers.

“Found what was wrong with it,” you smiled proudly. “It was stupid of me, really. There wasn’t any thermal paste in it. That’s why it kept blowing up.”

Miguel stared at the chip in his hand and blinked a few times.

“I assumed you were using it from the start,” he said, inspecting the cross section.

You rose to your feet in an instant and joined his site, excitement spilling from you. “These ion batteries should not require thermal paste — not for this amount of energy, at least. But yeah… my bad,” you said, rubbing the back of your neck.

Miguel locked eyes with yours and felt a familiar tingle in his body.

Fuck.

You were just so ridiculously attractive, and he wish he could hear you ramble about tech and science for hours.

“This is really, really good news,” he said genuinely, handing the chip back to you.

He squeezed your arm lightly as encouragement, knowing fully well he should be rewarding you in other ways.

His sweet girl…

You darted back to the floor, gathering some papers. “Sorry for the mess. I just had to figure this out and couldn’t sleep.”

A scientist at heart, you were.

Blood began to rush to his groin in no time. It couldn’t be helped. His body had been so on edge to finally fuck you, that it was in this permanent state of arousal around you.

“It’s fine. I still have those moments,” he said softly, crouching to help you out. “Sometimes I can’t sleep, and I have to do something else.”

“Like what?”

“I either go to the lab, or…” I jerk off to the thought of being buried deep inside you, he wanted to say.

You eyed him expectantly, biting your lip lightly, further hardening his cock.

“Well, it’s a bit late,” Miguel eventually said, standing tall. “Maybe you should get back to your apartment?”

He hated himself for even suggesting such option, but he didn’t want to push his luck. You being here would be fuel enough for the rest of the night as he fucked his hand.

“Oh, you just got back from a mission,” you fought back a yawn, tossing your backpack over your shoulder. “I’ll just leave.”

Miguel nodded, but was crumbling inside.

Your face lit up again. “But this was great, right?”

Please stay.

“You did great,” he said with a short smile. “Go get some rest.”

Please…

You made your way down the hall and waved at him. “See you in the morning, Miguel.”

He should have let you go.

But something took over him, before he could fight it back.

“Actually, you could stay. It’s nearly four in the morning,” he tried to sound as casual as possible, but the excitement was hard to contain. “And we have to head back to the lab early.”

You turned around and he stopped breathing.

Too much?

Then he the backpack slide down your arm, hittingbthe floor with a thud. “Oh, thank you! I really didn’t feel like swinging back to my apartment,” you voice held pure gratitude and he felt his ego soar. “Only… I don’t have any clothes.”

He shook his head as realisation hit him. “Right. Wait here.”

“Okay~”

Bolting into his room, he went through his closet, fetching a shirt and a robe.

But before heading out, he decided to change into some sweatpants and a shirt himself.

His erection welcomed the looser material, and he’d be able to better conceal it from you.

Taking a final look at his cock, Miguel decided to give it a few pumps as if trying to calm it down.

He couldn’t believe his luck.

He couldn’t believe his sweet girl would be so close to him in his clothes and apartment.

And bed.

As he exited the room and handed the clothes to you, he cleared his throat. “You can take my bed.”

You looked up at him. “Oh… no, Miguel. You just came back from a mission.”

“I’m not that tired. Just take it.”

Please.

“Are you sure?”

“One hundred percent.”

Anything that was his was yours. He would give it all to you.

“Be right back,” you said, before disappearing into the bathroom, closing the door behind you.

He immediately sighed in relief, adjusting his cock, feeling the first beads of precum spill from the tip.

How was he to survive this?

Not long after, you emerged again.

He glanced over at the length of you, taking in the sight of his shirt and robe on you. Your legs were still covered with the digital suit, but you looked absolutely ready to be devoured.

But he couldn’t do it.

Not yet.

His cock twitched in his pants, yearning to be inside you.

Then something else caught his attention when his moved up your body.

It couldn’t be…

Two symmetrical protuberances poked through the fabric of your shirt — his shirt.

“Are those…” his voice faltered momentarily, not trusting his own eyes.

You followd his line of sight and giggled. “Oh! Yeah. Got them pierced way back. Wanted to defy my dad and got them out of spite,” you went on, adjusting the fabric of the shirt under the robe. “But eventually kept them. They look cute.”

Cute?

Miguel was at a loss for words.

Your voice mixed with your carefree posture sent jolts directly into his cock.

“I…” he swallowed the lump in his throat. “I didn’t notice them before,” he said, feeling his mouth run dry.

“I was wearing a bra,” you replied with a shrug and a tender smile.

This was almost comically painful.

You were the closest thing he had ever known to innocence as of late. Yet here you stood, wearing just his shirt, no bra, and with your pierced nipples poking through his shirt.

But none of that seemed to matter to you.

You were completely oblivious of how painfully hard he was for you.

“Did it hurt?”

“Terribly,” you said, still glacing down at your breasts and hardened nipples. “But I think it’s worth it.”

The adorable way in which you said it was almost driving him insane.

Just how innocent could one person be…

Before he could even process his thoughts, he spoke, “Can I…”

Your eyes met his and Miguel feared he had now fucked it up for good.

Brilliant, Miguel…

“Oh, you mean… you want to see them?”

Should he back down and just deny his intentions?

“You’ve never seen nipple piercings before?”

He shook his head.

Just as he was about to tell you to forget it, you lifted his shirt, revealing your breasts to him.

He nearly exploded right there and then.

“Oh, please!” she giggled. “We’re people of science, and you haven’t seen this before. Science is all about curiosity and discovery.”

Miguel, however, wasn’t listening to any of that and felt as though he was hypnotised. He could tear his eyes away from your perky nipples and the metal rods that went through them, a tiny spider danging from each of them.

He wasn’t sure when or how he had got so close to you, but he lifted his hand to touch one.

His cock twitched violently and he felt his mind hazy with lust.

“They’re cool, right?” you beamed, allowing him to swipe the pad of his thumb across the tiny spider.

“Yeah.”

Really ‘cool’.

More precum dripped from his tip and had to fight back his fangs from slipping out.

He wanted to bend over and dart his tongue out to play with them. He wanted to tug on them and wanted you to arch your back with a soft moan.

You pulled down the shirt again and he flinched his hand back instantly, swallowing hard.

“So… if — when you have a baby and want to breastfeed… will there be an issue?”

Of course his need to breed you had to surface at the worst possible time.

But he had to know. He needed to know if that would be a nuisance. He couldn’t take any risks and he wanted you completely ready to carry his children.

You shrugged, adjusting the robe around you. “I wasn’t thinking that far ahead when I got them, but I suppose I just have to take them out.”

He nodded, taking a few steps back.

You stretched out with a yawn. “Mind if I go to sleep now?”

“Of course,” he nodded.

You were about to whirl on your feet, but decided against it. “How do you say ‘thank you’ in Spanish?”

That caught him off guard and his eyes widened. “Gracias.”

Then you gave him the sweetest smile. “Gracias, Miguel.

He could cum just from this alone.

How he would teach you the filthiest things in Spanish… how he would whisper them in your ear, knowing fully well you couldn’t understand a word…

You then slipped into his room and closed the door.

He ran both hands through his hair, wanting to let out a scream.

The things he wanted to do to you…

The things you deserved done to you…

He brought one hand down to tug at his waistband, revealing his soaked cock.

Then he bit the back of his other hand.

Hard.

He didn’t even care if he drew blood.

He couldn’t take this anymore.

Engulfed with overwhelming frustration, he pressed his forehead against the tall window that overlooked Nueva York.

He had to calm down, or else he’d have to synthesise a serum to lower his levels of testosterone…

He had to find a way to stop.

As minutes ticked by, he decided to check your bio readings on his watch. Your heart rate had lowered significantly, indicating him you were now asleep.

The predator in him took control again and he paced towards his bedroom, opening the door just enough to check on you.

Fast asleep.

He walked in with careful steps, finally taking in the sight of you on his bed.

The floor-to-ceiling windows allowed for the faintest moonlight to be cast on you.

He felt his heart was about to implode as he drew near, slowly sitting by the edge of the mattress.

You lay on your back, breathing evenly and covered up to your waist with a blanket.

Miguel took a deep and shaky breath.

You smelled of him and his bedsheets smelled of you.

Such a powerful and dangerous combination, that he almost considered gripping his cock.

Bur decided against it.

Instead, he say there, staring at you, absorbing every single detail of your body.

His hand twitched as an itch took over it.

An itch he had to scratch.

He reached out to graze the back of one finger along your forearm, feeling your warmth coating his skin.

His sweet girl…

His imagination ran wild and he had hoped he could have fucked you to sleep, not sliding out of you, making sure you’d take his seed.

Pain swallowed him whole as despair settled.

What if he never managed to make you his?

What if you decided you wanted nothing more than a friendship?

How could he cope?

Suddenly, you flinched and rolled to your side and heaved a deep sigh. “Oh, Tom…”

Miguel was left petrified and his blood ran cold.

Who the fuck was Tom?

Part 4

Masterlist

#miguel o’hara x reader #miguel o’hara smut #miguel o’hara x you #miguel o’hara #miguel ohara x reader #spiderman 2099 x reader #spiderman 2099 #miguel o’hara x fem!reader

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deadghosy · 2 months

Note

I was wondering if you could do a miniso penguin reader being a delivery boy for all of hell (mostly hazbin)

I JUST LOOKED IT UP AND OMGGGG ITS SO CUTEEE🦆💗🦆 AND YES I WILL! THANK YOU MY GHOST

HAZBIN HOTEL X PENGUIN! READER

prompt: you deliver mail all over hell, but mostly to your favorite place!

Okay starters off….you definitely get petted by the sinners who walk by you. Like you are so adorable!

I headcannon that you have a magic barrier that activates when you are in danger. Like say for example, a sinner tried to stab and mug but a bubble appears around you as you quack and roll away.

But like…you are the most known person in hell. YOU COULD BE WALKING AND GIVING MAIL AND IMMEDIATELY- “Hey [reader]!”

Yeah you’re quite known🦆🔥

The overlords love you! Carmilla adores you as you help her move her things around with her supplies of angelic metal. And Alastor….he joked about eating you up because of how cute you are..you definitely hide behind carmilla as she glared at him.

Alastor said sorry as he buys you ice cream for scaring you. (Charlie made him do it after carmilla snitched on him)

The most place you love giving mail to is the hazbin hotel! You like it there as you always get greeted by the people there gently. Charlie would pet you as she gushes how cute you are and how you should’ve been an angel.

Husk just pokes at your chubby and cute body as you quack and rub your face in his leg. You are the size of a penguin so guess how small you are 😭💗

You and fat nuggets are best friends, dead ass you both speak animal to each other and just gossip… “quack…” “oink oink..” “QUACK?!” You yelled pointing to Alastor as fat nuggets nodded seriously. Angel tried to record it but he just couldn’t help but laugh

Lucifer loves you! Like at first he would just watch you around hell secretly as he didn’t want to scare you off too easy. But soon he felt over protective at how pure and nice you are to other sinners and hell born

I headcannon every time it’s extermination, you would be forced to be at the hotel as you bake cookies to past the time helping Charlie and the other feel less stress as the angels kill the sinners.

“So like…do you lay eggs or somethin'?” Angel asked looking at the egg boiz under you as they are sound asleep. You just stay there like a mama penguin as you shrugged.

“[READER] I CHOSE YOU!” Vaggie yells as you waddle to a person and hug them in need. Its funny to imagine you being used a Pokémon who’s only attack is “HUG SURPRISE!”

I headcannon you to use a rolling attack. LIKE FOR EXAMPLE, you are getting chased so you roll like a ball and BOWLING BALL THEY ASS! STRIKEEE‼️‼️

You have a room in the hotel, it’s just you don’t stay there often. But the other would loved if you stayed at the hotel with them as they find you lovely to around. Like imagine how cool it is to be tired from delivering mail all day just to go to the hotel and see your own room.

Immediately passing out in the soft bed😭🦆

I imagine you walking, more like waddling and the egg boiz just copy your waddling as they are still baby chickens in eggs.

Velvette definitely has you go to her section of the vee tower so you can wear those cute sailor boy outfits 😭 like imagine how cute that is….

Sir Pentious and nifty love you also as they find you adorable. The egg boiz love you, and nifty….she just finds you interesting how every sinner knows who you are and wants to be your best friend.

I can see you being sick and not coming to deliver mail to the hotel, and immediately you wake up sniffling as you waddle to your door to see a bunch of gift baskets as you quack surprised at all those candies and get better cards….man you are loved

#penguin #penguin! reader #penguin! reader x hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel x gn reader #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel x male reader #hazbin #hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel imagine #hazbin hotel headcanons #hazbin hotel lucifer x reader

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writing-fanics · 2 months

Text

Nothing lasts forever

Lucifer Morningstar x Reader

[warning: cheating: angst: panic attack: implied death]

‘More than anything music box’

As you stood there, your heart felt as though it had stopped beating at that very moment. Your breathing started to slow down as your smile faltered and transformed into a frown. A look of profound sadness and sorrow took over your face as you gazed at the scene before you.

Your eyes were fixed on Lucifer, one of the most beautiful angels in all of Heaven, the one you had opened your heart up to and shared your deepest feelings with.

But now, you were witnessing him cheating on you with Lilith, the first woman and Adam's wife. The pain you felt was almost unbearable, as you watched the love of your life betray your trust and shatter your heart into a million pieces.

You could feel your throat closing as your breathing quickened. You felt sick to your stomach as if someone had punched you in the gut. You wanted to throw up. You wanted to scream. To cry, to disappear from existence. You couldn’t believe he’d do such a thing to you, were you not enough?

Were you not as beautiful as she is? Were you too clingy? To annoying? Why did he betray you and your trust?

He promised to always be by your side when you needed him, to always catch you when you fall. To be your shoulder to cry on. To never break your trust.

But here he was breaking that very promise and trust, leaving you feeling empty and hollow. The two of you were made for each other, and with the scene unfolding before you. Made you think otherwise.

“I love you, Lilith,” whispered Lucifer, as he stared at Lilith in awe kissing her on the lips.

Your whole world shattered as your back hit the tree, and you slid down onto the ground. Placing your hand over your mouth, muffling your wails. You couldn’t breathe and felt the world closing in on you. You were nothing to him. You sniffled quietly placing your head into your hands, and wept as you swiftly flew away.

You fell into a heap on the floor of your house, sobbing as you curled up into a ball. You saw everything and what you saw would forever be engraved into your memory, you’ll never get it out of your head. Seeing them like that, him like that with another woman. Made your stomach turn, how could he do such a thing to you?

“W- Was I not enough?” You whimpered, as you lay in the fetal position. Your face is red and puffy cheeks stained with tears, your heart aching and unbearable pain. You knew he felt what you were going through at this moment, and couldn’t care less to comfort you. Your love was bound and could feel each other's emotions when they became severe, and you knew for a fact he could feel it.

But didn’t care enough to comfort you. He was having too much fun with Lilith, doing things that he should only be doing to you his lover.

You thought he would never do such a thing to you. Never betray you and break your heart, and here he was ripping it right out of your throat. If he had noticed you would he have stopped? Would he have kept going? Taunting you, teasing you, on an act he’d never done to you. Such an act he’ll never do to you now.

You thought your relationship was good perfect even. Yes, you had the occasional fight but would always end up back in each other’s arms, holding each other lovingly. Feeling safe and secure in each other's warm embrace.

“I'm so sorry, my dear duckling," he whispered, pulling you close and showering your shoulder with gentle kisses. "Please know that I understand how you feel.”

"I forgive you, Luci," you said, enveloping him in a warm embrace and smiling through your tears as he held you. He pressed a tender kiss to your forehead and whispered comforting words in your ear, promising to make things right.

You banged your fist against the cold ground; gripping at the fabric of your clothes, as you cried. The tears didn’t seem to stop and wouldn’t anytime soon. You couldn’t breathe, the room around you started to spin. You felt dizzy and nauseous, feeling bile rising in your throat causing you to gag. You swallowed and gripped the side of your head.

You tossed it to the ground, screaming and crying in anger and frustration. “HOW COULD HE DO THIS TO ME!” You shouted, trashing everything that reminded you of him. You couldn’t stop crying, the things this man did to you. How he made you smile and laugh, how he made you fall head over heels.

You wanted to disappear and fade back into dust, your original form. To not be forced to live with this pain for all eternity, knowing that even after this you’d still love him. He’d come back and apologize slowly making up for it but…..

You stood there with the other angels, his siblings trying their best to comfort you. As you watched him be banished from Heaven, cast down with his new lover. Leaving you there alone in Heaven, with no shoulder to cry on.

You found yourself standing amidst a group of angels, feeling a sense of unease and trying hard to keep yourself composed. As you looked ahead, you noticed him standing before Lilith, his wings stretched out protectively, shielding her from any harm. The sight of him being so close to Lilith made your heart ache with a mixture of emotions.

You couldn't help but wonder if you were so unpleasant to look at that he couldn't even spare a glance in your direction. The whole situation left you feeling conflicted, and you couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy towards Lilith, who seemed to have his undivided attention.

As you stood there looking at him, you noticed that his gaze had shifted to meet yours. It was then that you saw a hint of remorse in his eyes, and you couldn't help but feel a wave of sadness wash over you. In that moment, a single tear trickled down his cheek, and you averted your eyes, unable to bear the intensity of the situation.

As you looked away from him, he noticed the tears that had welled up in your own eyes, and the hollow, defeated expression etched on your face. It was a moment of deep emotional turmoil for both of you, and the silence that hung between you was almost suffocating.

“Nothing lasts forever,” Azrael said, as he placed his hand on your shoulder squeezing it gently in reasurrance.

You shook your head and stepped outside of the courtroom, stopping at the stairs. You reached around your neck taking off the necklace, Lucifer had given you years ago.

You stared at it for a moment, opening it. A soft melody played, tears trickled down her cheeks as whisps of yellow magic swirled, around the locket music box. A duck swam in a pond while a swan, swam up next to it nuzzling their heads into each other.

As she witnessed the heartwarming scene unfolding before her, she couldn't help but let out a choked sob. A tearful smile graced her face as she watched the duck and the swan gradually transform into Lucifer and You, respectively. The two characters held each other closely, their embrace exuding a sense of comfort and security.

Lucifer, still holding onto You, took to the skies, flying around with exuberance. His laughter filled the air, and his smile was contagious. You, too, shared in his joy, reveling in the moment with him.

As they soared through the clouds, a vivid memory of their first kiss flashed before your eyes. You remembered how you had wrapped your arms tightly around his neck, and he had held you close to him. The moment had been magical, and it was a memory that you cherished deeply.

You smiled, closing the locket as a gust of wind blew the magic away, and you along with it, returning back to your original form to dust.

A/n: idk what I just created there’s no part ii for this unless y’all beg me for it but idk still]

Taglist

@froggybich

#lucifer morningstar x reader #Lucfier x reader #x reader #fanfic #angst #romance #headcanons #hazbin hotel #lucifer morningstar #lucifer x reader #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin lucifer #lucifer magne #hazbin hotel lucifer x reader

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ioniiaa · 2 months

Text

My Darling, My Honey

Alastor X Fem!Reader (Part 11)

Have a nice big chapter/part for the weekend! :D

Part 11:

Did.. did Charlie just say... Alastor?

You felt someone poke your face, multiple times, all at once, "Hey, Hey, miss bandage face, you good?"

You blink rapidly, being pulled out of your stupor and laugh awkwardly, "Ah haha, uh yeah. Yup, I'm good... Haha, thanks Angel.."

Angel just squints at you, not convinced of your act at all but just sighs and says, "Alright, whatever you say, weirdo.." and then returns back to chatting with Husk.

Vaggie, who was sitting next to you struck up a conversation, "Are you really sure you're okay to be up and around already? You look like you saw a ghost or something."

You briefly glanced at the radio that was sitting on the mantle on the wall before returning your attention to Vaggie, "Yeah, being up was much better than sitting doing nothing, I thought I was going to waste away if I didn't do something."

Vaggie sighs and nods her head, "I know the feeling."

"And.. I swear I thought I heard Charlie mention the name Al-"

"Alastor! You're back! We have a new guest staying at the hotel! Come say hi!" Charlie shot out of her seat as soon as she saw Alastor's shadows start to manifest, signaling his return.

You felt your blood run cold as your suspicions were confirmed. Yes, she just said Alastor. How common could that name be down here? This is just a coincidence, surely- Of all names!

"My, my dear Charlie, you seem quite excited! I haven't seen you bouncing off the walls like this in ages!" Alastor chuckles as he allows Charlie to practically drag him over by the wrist to the group.

He sounds like a radio host...

Your breath starts to quicken as Charlie guides him over to you, his aura feels so oppressive, unlike any Overlord you had ever met before... But what made your hair really stand on the back of your neck was the static noise that filled the air as he got closer. You felt your eyes shake and your gut sink in your stomach.

What was this feeling?

You gulp and look up, eyes wide, looking like a deer in headlights as you make eye contact with this "Alastor".

"Go on! Introduce yourself!" You felt Charlie nudge you excitedly, in an attempt to nudge you out of your frozen state.

On his face, a large, creepy grin/smile- (if you could even call it that) grew even larger on his face - a feat you didn't even know was possible. You felt like you should be scared but then... It dawned on you.

That feeling in your gut dissipated instantly and it felt like a weight got suddenly lifted off your chest.

This was Alastor. This was your Alastor.

Tears start rolling down your face uncontrollably as your body is racked with sobs.

"Heyyy! Hey! It's okay, (y/n)! I know Al can be a wee bit intimidating sometimes but I promise he's not a bad guy! Well... mostly.. haha..." Charlie trails off with a nervous chuckle as she scrambles around the lobby to find you some tissues to dry your tears.

Upon hearing your name said out loud, a loud record scratch filled the air.

"Haha... ha...Charlie, dearest! My, you'd think the years are catching up to me! Was that some sort of joke? Why, I didn't know you wanted to become a comedian! Did you say.. (y/n)? That must be a mistake. I've only ever known one person by that name and they surely couldn't have ended up in Hell of all places!" Alastor chuckles, the laugh track coming from his staff warping as he hovers over Charlie with an intimidating aura- thinking she was playing some sort of sick joke on him.

Charlie whips around to see Alastor up in her face and then she scrambles back, "Woah! What? Alastor! Gods, no, why would I joke about our new guest? That would go against everything i'm trying to do here!"

Alastor's gaze darts over to you, "You see, I think this '(y/n)' and I need to have a chat..." His eyes narrow as he makes quotation marks with his fingers as he says your name.

He walks towards you and grabs your wrist with force, finger like claws starting to dig into your arm- despite protest from Charlie and Vaggie to let you go- to stop harassing their new guest because you were still quite injured and fragile. Even Angel and Husk got up from their seats at the bar after hearing the commotion in the lounge and started yelling at him to stop hurting you because it was very apparent that you were in pain with how rough he was handling you.

Then, with a snap, he teleports you and himself up to his radio tower- away from all the commotion.

Alastor slams the door shut with a fury that you've never seen before, and locks it to make sure you won't even try to make a feeble attempt at an escape.

He was powerful. Alastor knew he didn't really need to lock the door because with his power, he could vaporize you before you even thought of making a dash for the door. He did it as an intimidation tactic because he knew the fear it instilled in his prey.

Now, walking towards you, he pointed his staff at your chest, and leaned in close to your face. Strange static and symbols fill the air as he and his antlers grow in size, towering over you.

"Now... who are you really? You get one chance to make a feeble excuse before I kill you and broadcast your screams for all of Hell to hear, for making a mockery of my dear (y/n) by taking the name of my beloved and masquerading around Hell- thinking you can show up here like this to try and mess with ME- tHe RaDiO DEMON."

You see dark shadows and tentacle-like masses appear, and you stumble backward until your back hits a wall, never breaking eye contact with him- your lip quivering in fear.

"I.. But- It... is me...hun... I missed you so much..." You whisper with a somber smile that's quickly warped into an ugly crying face. The unrelenting tears keep rolling down your face, and your left hand reaches up towards his even more demonically altered form that towers over you in a desperate attempt to get him to recognize you.

Before you can touch his face, one of his hands snatches your wrist and pulls it closer to himself to examine the sparkle that caught his eye as you started to reach out to him, roughly jostling you and lifting you up in the air by your wrist as a result.

You wince briefly at the pain in your wrist and shoulder joints as he examines your hand when you remember you were wearing your ring. You never took it off all these years.

You could hear his breath hitch just ever so slightly over the static as he gently put you down and let your feet touch the floor again.

Alastor realized that the ring on your left ring finger was the exact one he had gotten for you- the one he put on your ring finger right before he buried you right the night you were brutally assaulted and murdered back when he was alive.

He slowly morphed back into his "normal" form. (Normal for Hell, that is, this was an entirely new look for him from what you remembered when he was alive).

The shock dawning on him that it really was you was apparent as he took a few steps back, still holding your hand. He looked at you in disbelief, the look of pure shock was just like how you had looked at him initially in the lobby.

Then suddenly, he pulled you into a warm embrace, "My dearest... I am so sorry for hurting you. My darling... whatever are you doing here? Someone like you doesn't belong here!"

Now, holding your face in both of his hands, he wiped your tears with the most gentle expression on his face, a stark contrast from the nightmarish demonic one just a moment ago. and you could almost swear you could see the slightest traces of a misty look in his eyes as he held you.

His claw-like fingers slightly dug into your face, but not enough to hurt, as he examined your new appearance, his gaze turning from soft into a hardened expression once again. Almost snarling, he began to ask you again, "Tell me, darling, tell me the name of the gods forsaken angel bastard that cast you down from Heaven. I will find a way to make them pay. I'll make them ALL pay for this... NO ONE will ever harm you again..." The strange symbols and glitchy auras were threatening to come out again.

You sniffled, still trying to calm down your tears, which immediately made him halt in his tracks and turn his attention back to you at this moment.

You looked at the ground, and you knew you couldn't avoid this conversation forever, "Hun... I... Before we met... there was something I never told you-" Before you could finish, you felt your legs start to wobble underneath you- the adrenaline was starting to fade and you were starting to feel some of the pain from your previous injuries come back to you.

"Please, my love, take a seat first." He guided you to a set of a table and two chairs. Ever the gentleman, he pulled your chair out for you and helped made sure you were alright before he sat down across the table from you.

You put your hands on the table, a signal he immediately picked up on as a sign to envelop your hands in his. You looked at him in the eyes with a look of shame that scrunched up your face as you prepared to tell him the truth, "Alastor, hun... I never went to Heaven..."

You swore you heard another record scratch before a quiet hum of static filled the air again. Alastor chuckled, "Oh my dear, never lost your sense of humor, I see!"

A look of even deeper shame washes over your face as you break eye contact with him and stare at his hands that held your's on the table, "It's true. Alastor..." You sigh deeply, feeling an aching pain in your chest, not only from your injuries but also from the mental anguish you were dealing with as you shakily begin to explain everything about your past. Your shitty family and messed-up inlaws. Your narcissistic, unloving, and abusive ex-husband that you killed.

You painstakingly revealed every single minute detail. You told him everything.

-> Part 12

Tag List:

@mysticwitchcraftco @lil-bexie @lonely-burger @cherry-cola-100 @angelxx7 @mariaclarade-la-cruz1 @avitute @justhellacesome @mcrtrashfan @spookysisters

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coryosmin · 3 months

Text

innocence

coriolanus snow x fem!reader

warnings: nsfw, mdni, loss of virginity, praise kink, best friend! coryo, innocent reader, fingering, p in v, unprotected sex, coryo has a big dick, reader is just so cute, coriolanus is his own warning btw, soft!coryo, not my best writing but i’m sick and a slut so let’s get this done teehee

3,000 words

It all began when you were having a conversation with Arachne and Clemensia. They started talking about sex and how they hadn’t had good sex in a while, asking you if you had. To which you lied and said yes. But ultimately, you had no clue about sex. It wasn’t something that you prioritized as your main focus was on your studies. But now, it was most definitely on your mind.

Coryo had been your best friend since the two of you were children. He was the only person in the world that you could tell anything and everything. Just as he could tell you anything and everything. He had invited you over to his apartment on Corso after school, exclaiming that his grandma’am and Tigris wouldn’t be home until much later because grandma’am had a few errands she had to run. So you were sat on Coryo’s bed while he sat on his desk, working on an assignment.

You bit your lip as you looked over at your blond best friend. “Coryo,” You broke the silence.

“Hmm?” He asked, not looking up from his work.

You took a deep breath, unsure of how to ask your question. Sex was a weird topic to bring up with your best friend, right? Or is it normal? Arachne and Clemensia seemed pretty chill talking about it with you. So maybe it’s a normal topic of discussion? You shook your head, deciding not to overthink it. “Have you ever had sex?”

Coriolanus dropped his pencil, clearly not expecting that question. He turned around in his chair, looking at you with an eyebrow quirked up. “Excuse me?” He asked, his blue eyes looking at you with slight amusement.

“Have you ever had sex?” You asked again, clearly unashamed by the question. Coryo’s your best friend. Of course, you can talk to him about this sort of thing.

“Why would you like to know?” He asked, his voice was neutral as he looked at you.

You sighed, slightly embarrassed by the way he was looking at you. You tried to think about how to word your explanation before speaking. “Clemensia and Arachne were talking about sex earlier,” You began to speak, your voice a bit timid. “And I felt kind of lost in the conversation.”

Coriolanus nodded his head as he listened to you. “Lost how?”

“Well, I’ve never had sex before,” You admitted, unable to help the blush on your cheeks. “And they asked me if I had and I may have lied and said yes.”

Coriolanus couldn’t help the smirk on his face as he looked at you speak to him. You were just so innocent and pure. Of course, he knew that you’ve never had sex before. He made sure of that throughout your life, saying that men were disgusting and that you could only ever trust him. Truth be told, he wanted you for himself, to rely on him to help you through these things. And now? Maybe the time has come. “Well to answer your question, I have.” He answered simply.

“Is it really as bad as Arachne and Clemensia made it sound?” You asked, tilting your head in that innocent way that Coryo always adores.

“Bad?” Coriolanus laughed in disbelief. “If they have partners that know what they’re doing, it shouldn’t be bad at all.”

Your lips formed an “o” shape as you heard Coryo’s words. “They said that their boyfriends never like prepare them,” You said nervously. This conversation was definitely awkward to have. “That it usually only lasts a few minutes and then he cums and then they’re done.”

“Then they don’t have good partners,” Coriolanus replied, shrugging his shoulders.

You simply nodded your head, understanding what Coriolanus was saying to you. You bit your lip. “What’s it supposed to feel like?”

Your question made Coriolanus inhale sharply. He was so ready to just take you. He got up from his desk and walked over to you, sitting down next to you on his bed. “Would you like me to show you?” He murmured, looking at you with his soft blue eyes. He reached up to move a piece of your hair out of your face.

Your eyes widened at his question as your cheeks reddened. “C-Coryo, we’re best friends,” You were flustered as you spoke, unable to help the tremor in your voice.

Coriolanus smiled softly at you, caressing your cheek. The coolness of your hand feeling nice on your warm skin. “It’s okay for best friends to help one another, Y/N.” He replied softly.

You looked up at him with doe eyes as he looked at you. You swallowed. “I-I don’t think best friends help each other with something like this,” you whispered, not trusting your voice.

Coriolanus chuckled, unable to help himself. “Maybe not normal best friends,” he whispered back. “But we’re best of friends.” He said, leaning in slightly. “Let me show you.” You didn’t think much about it. Not when Coryo was just so close to you. You nodded your head and Coryo smiled. “Good girl.”

That phrase alone made you clench your thighs, an action not missed by Coryo though he didn’t mention it. He simply smirked, leaning in to kiss you. You didn’t kiss back right away, just relishing in the feeling of Coryo’s lips on yours. They were so soft and sweet and tasted like the pastries you had brought earlier when you came over. Your eyes fluttered shut as you began to kiss Coryo back, moving your lips in sync with his.

This technically wasn’t your first kiss. Your first kiss was with Sejanus Plinth back in sophomore year when you both talked about not ever having your first kiss. So while you’re not the most experienced person, you have at least kissed someone. Though you never told Coryo about it.

Coriolanus deepened the kiss, moving his hand from your cheek to the back of your head. He kissed you as though his life depended on it, needing your lips to survive. His tongue traced your lips and you couldn’t help but part them as he began to explore your mouth. You let out a small moan at the feeling, causing Coriolanus to inhale. You were wearing a dress. Just a simple one that you changed into after school before heading to Coryo’s house. And Coriolanus was grateful because it made things easier.

Coryo’s free hand moved down your body gently and slowly, warming you up to his touch. And as his fingers loosely played with the hem of your dress, Coriolanus removed his lips from yours, moving to kiss your neck. You gasped, biting your lip. His fingers moved to your legs, creeping up your thigh. Coryo pulled away to look into your beautiful eyes. “Gonna make you feel good, okay?” He whispered to you, his eyes so honest and genuine.

You nodded your head, not trusting your voice. Coriolanus went back to kissing your neck, sucking on your pulse point which caused you to let out a shaky breath. You felt the heat pooling in your pelvis (pls I hated using that word). Coriolanus moved his fingers to your underwear underneath your dress, causing you to instinctively close your legs. “Shh, it’s okay.” He whispered into your ear, kissing your earlobe. “Relax for me.” You took a deep breath, relaxing as you opened your legs back up again. “Good girl,” He murmured. This caused you to verbally whimper as Coriolanus’s fingers made their way under the waistband of your underwear. The coolness of his fingers pressing your warm skin.

Coriolanus moved his head to look you in the eye as his fingers gently touched your slit, moving the wetness around. “You’re so wet,” He murmured. You bit your lip, his touch foreign to you as you tried not to back away from it. You’ve only ever touched yourself once or twice down there and you didn’t know what you were doing. Coriolanus’s fingers gently went onto your clit, circling it slowly with his fingers. You tried to stop yourself from making a noise, embarrassed. But you couldn’t help the small moan you let out as Coriolanus rubbed your clit. “Don’t hide your noises from me, my dear. I’ll take care of you, don’t worry.” He murmured, pressing his forehead against yours.

He moved his fingers from your clit, bringing his middle finger down to your hole. You whimpered as he inserted his finger into you slowly. Coriolanus began to thrust his finger in and out of you slowly, making you moan. “Coryo,” You moaned out, your hand gripping the edge of the bed.

“I know, baby,” He murmured, kissing you on the lips as he continued fingering your pussy.

Coriolanus inserted another finger, curling them upwards. You gasped, bringing your hand to your mouth as you moaned out, “Oh my god.”

Coriolanus couldn’t help the smile on his face as you moaned, the sounds of your voice being like heaven to his ears. “You like it, hm?” He asked, kissing your cheek. “You like that I’m fingering your pussy? You’re so tight. Can’t wait for my cock to be inside of you.” His words were so dirty and yet they turned you on so much. You couldn’t help but whine at the thought, bucking your hips against his fingers. “Can tell that you want my cock. Bet you’ve never even seen one before, fuck.” He continued to move his fingers inside of you.

“I-” You moaned out, feeling a tightness in your abdomen. You leaned into Coryo as he was right next to you, leaning your head on his shoulder. The room was filled with the sounds of you moaning and the sounds of your pussy as Coryo finger fucked you. There was a squelching sound, causing Coriolanus to groan in your ear.

“You’re about to cum, baby,” Coryo murmured, moving his fingers faster inside of you. “Let it all out, baby. You’re doing so good.”

You whined as you came undone, clenching your thighs together as your body began to shake. Your pussy gushed around his fingers, soaking your panties, the mattress underneath you, and the floor. “Oh fuck,” You moaned out. Coriolanus fingered you through your orgasm, not stopping until you relaxed. He pulled his fingers out of you, smiling as he saw the mess you made on his bed and his bedroom floor.

Coriolanus used his other hand to lift your head, making you look at him. “You did so good, baby.” He murmured, kissing your lips. “How did that feel?”

You blushed as you looked at your best friend. It all felt so intimate and well, it was. “G-good.” You stuttered. “I-is it normal for that to happen?” You asked shyly.

Coriolanus chuckled, shaking his head no. “Not everyone can do it,” He said, kissing your lips. “Guess that makes you special, my dear.” Coriolanus grabbed the hem of your dress, lifting it off of your body. “We are not done yet though.”

“You’re going to fuck me?” You asked though you knew the answer. He did say that he couldn’t wait for his cock to be inside of you.

Coriolanus nodded his head as he threw your dress to the side of the room, standing up to take off his clothes. His eyes racked over your body, taking in your beautiful figure. “You’re so beautiful,” Coriolanus said as he threw his shirt to the floor. He began unbuttoning his pants.

You blushed as you looked up at Coriolanus, biting your lip. “Thank you,” You said quietly. You couldn’t ignore the feeling of your heart fluttering as Coriolanus complimented you. You decided to take it upon yourself to take off your panties. They were soaked anyway so you threw them to the side.

“You’re welcome, sweetheart,” Coriolanus smiled as he removed his pants, kicking them off. You could see the obvious bulge in his underwear, the outline of it becoming a bit intimidating. You may have never seen a penis before but you knew that the average was about 4 or 5 inches. But by bulge alone, you could tell Coryo was more than that. “Unhook your bra for me?” He asked though it definitely sounded like a command. You obliged, taking your bra off. “And now lay down for me, princess.”

You nodded your head, moving so that your head was on Coryo’s pillow. The pillow smelt like him. Like roses and poverty.

Coriolanus took his underwear off, revealing his member to you. It was quite large. You whimpered as you looked at his size. “W-will it fit?” You asked innocently, looking at Coriolanus with doe eyes.

Coriolanus chuckled, nodding his head. “Yes, princess. It may hurt though,” He said, crawling on top of you. The heat from his body radiated onto yours as he positioned himself between your legs, his forehead resting against yours. He gave you a small kiss. “I’ll do what I can though to make it not hurt too much.” He murmured.

“Okay.” You murmured back, wrapping your arms around his neck. “Is this okay?” You asked, looking up at him.

Coriolanus nodded his head. “Of course, baby,” he replied. He reached a hand between the two of you, guiding his cock to your entrance. “Take a deep breath for me and relax.” You did exactly that. And Coriolanus began to ease his cock inside of you, very slowly. You were still so very wet and it took everything in Coryo’s power to not just shove himself inside of you.

You whined at the sensation, feeling the stretch of Coryo’s big cock as it eased inside of you. He was so big and you were so so tight. It hurt quite a bit, making your eyes well up with tears. Coriolanus began to kiss you, trying to distract you from the pain. His lips were so soft and tender, unlike the feeling of his cock which was so hard and so big. When he was inside of you, he stayed still for a few minutes, pulling away from your lips. “You okay?” He asked, his blue eyes filled with concern as he looked at you.

You looked back up at him, biting your lip. “It hurts.” You whimpered.

Coriolanus nodded his head in sympathy. “I know, baby, I know.” He said. “It’ll hurt until you get used to it.” He leaned back in, capturing your lips once more.

You guys lay there for a few minutes, kissing. And slowly, Coriolanus began to move his hips. He eased his cock back out before bringing it back in, causing you to whine from the pain as a few tears slipped out. And eventually, the tears of pain turned into tears of pleasure as the pain began to ease. You gasped, pulling away from the kiss to look up at Coryo. He gave you a small smile as he continued to thrust into you.

“You’re so warm and tight, baby.” He murmured, kissing your forehead as he moved his hips slowly. He couldn’t help but groan at the feeling of your wet pussy around his cock.

You gasped and moaned, feeling his cock filling you up. You finally understand what you’ve been missing out on. Coryo made you feel so full and it began to feel so so good. “Y-you can go faster,” You said.

Coriolanus’s smile turned into a smirk as he heard your words. He positioned himself so he was leaning on his forearms rather than on his hands, bringing his head towards your neck. His hips began to move a bit faster and harder, making you let out a high-pitched moan as his cock hit that sweet spot inside of you. “Fuck, baby.” Coriolanus moaned against your neck, pressing kisses against it. “You’re taking me so well.”

Coriolanus was in heaven. It was he who gets to take your virginity, only he can make you feel so warm and protected and only he gets to make you feel good. Coriolanus was the only one who got to hear your beautiful moans, your lovely voice. Your pussy was just so tight around his cock and you were so wet. He hadn’t had sex in a while and he hadn’t been expecting to have sex with you yet but god he was happy that he was.

“Coryo,” You moaned out, closing your eyes. You moaning his name only made Coriolanus move more frantically.

“Feel so good around me, darling,” He moaned in your ear, unable to help the noises he was making. “Gonna make you cum on my cock like a good girl.”

You whined at his words, meeting his thrusts with your own grinds against him. “Feels so good inside me, Coryo, so big,” You moaned out, putting your face to his shoulder. You pressed a kiss along his collarbone.

“Fuck, baby,” He lifted himself slightly, moving his head to look at his cock plunging in and out of you. He looked back at your face, groping one of your breasts, massaging the nipple with his finger.

You arched your back, moaning Coriolanus’s name. You felt that tightening that you felt earlier in your abdomen. “I-I’m close, Coryo,” You moaned out.

“Me too, baby, me too,” He said, leaning his head to take your nipple into his mouth, massaging the other one. He continued to rut inside of you.

And the sensations were too much, making you let out a very loud moan as your legs began to quiver, your orgasm hitting you harshly and quickly. Coriolanus slowed down his hips, helping you ride out your orgasm. And as you calmed down, he pulled out of you, jerking his cock off a few times before spilling onto your stomach with a loud groan.

And when you both came down from your highs, Coriolanus laid down next to you. He pressed a kiss to your temple. “How was it, baby?”

You smiled, looking at Coriolanus with a lazy smile. “I-it was lovely, Coryo. Thank you,” You said so kindly.

Coriolanus’s heart melted. He kissed your lips before replying. “It’s what the best of best friends do,” He murmured against your lips.

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