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Thursday: MORSE!

Fancy, terrified: What was that?

Jakes: That is the call of someone who is very pissed, and on a mission to fuck someone up.

1 notes

Beat: I’ve never seen bad boy types protectin’ stray kittens to show their soft sides.

Beat: It’s always me pickin’ up the kittens.

Beat:

Beat: Maybe I’m the bad boy.

4 notes
<div> —  Touma, on his morning routine (HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!) </div><span>Everyday is leg day when you’re running from your problems.</span>
0 notes
Galo
What if “It’s Raining Men” and “Let the Bodies Hit the Floor” are both about the same event, but from different perspectives?
Aina
I’m literally begging you to stop.
0 notes

Natsuo: One iced coffee and- how would you like your coffee?

Shigaraki: [clenching his fists and squinting] As dark and bitter as my soul.

Natsuo, turning to the cashier: And a white mocha, thanks.

Cashier:

17 notes

Edgar: I’d like to remind all of you how dull your lives would be without me

Sean:

Geoffrey:

Jonathan: what did you do this time?

3 notes
Conversation
Midori
Can't you just be the bigger person?
Shinobu
I already am, he's like three feet tall—
0 notes
Conversation
Mika
You're my best friend, but I'd fuck you if you asked.
Arashi
What?
Mika
What?
Hiyori
(from across the office) HE SAID HE'D FUCK YOU IF YOU ASKED!
0 notes
Conversation
Subaru
Make no mistake. Not only am I party rocking, but I am also in the house tonight.
Mao
But are you shuffling?
Subaru
Everyday.
Makoto
What language are you two speaking??
0 notes
Conversation
Gluttony
Why say mean words when you could just bite somebody, or even swallow them whole? I will never understand.
100 notes

Yuuji: hi welcome to applebees, would you like apples or bees?

Megumi: b-bees?

Yuuji: HE HAS SELECTED THE B E E S

Megumi: w-wait-

Nobara: *walks in with a jar of bees*

Megumi: WAIT-

15 notes
<div> —  Lawless, probably </div><span>The idea of a straight vampire is very funny to me. Like, imagine you’re immortal and you aren’t even capable of fully appreciating the good parts of it. All your vampire friends fully understand the aesthetic and wear dark and flowing clothes and sip blood out of goblets and then there’s just like you wearing…I don’t know. A salmon polo shirt and tan shorts. Whatever straight people wear.</span>
34 notes
Conversation
Romano
[storms into a flower shop]
England, the florist
[frowning a little] Hello, and welcome to Britannia Blooms, how may I--
Romano
[slams his hands onto the counter] Eyebrow bastard. How do you very aggressively say "fuck you" in flower language?!
England
[blinks in surprise and then smiles to himself] My time has come.
Romano
What?
England
[clears throat] Never mind. First, you'll need a bouquet of geraniums to represent stupidity. And then...
15 notes