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greenunoreversecard · 9 months

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Greeny's Musings of a Madman ep.1 pt.1

Today on Greeny’s Musings of a madman, I am going to be combining my absolute love of rottmnt, music and writing to present the people with this absolute mess of a playlist and character analysis mix! (Basically I made a playlist of songs I think Leo would listen to and feel the need to justify my choices)

-Early 200’s music/Kesha-

Jumping right into it, I have quite a few 2000-2010’s songs, most of them are kesha. Leo is, for lack of a better term, very flamboyant. The early 2000’s was quite a revolutionary time for the music industry, with many artists we listen to today paving their path during this time.

This era definitely had and still has in effect on people of all ages, even now, during 2023. With Leo being roughly high school aged (depending on where you look at him, pre or post movie.) We can assume his father is around Gen-X, maybe a millennial. And with him being a middle child, as Raph is the oldest, it is quite likely that he was experiencing this genre of music from a young age. So, I’d like to think he’d keep the music from his childhood with him, so I put some in this playlist. He definitely seems like he would enjoy Kesha’s music, so I did put a lot of that on there, but he would likely listen to more than just Kesha.

-The Rare Americans-

I put a couple of The Rare American’s songs on the playlist. So I’ll explain in the order in which they show up.

Odd Ducks- This song is about being proud to be different. Seeing as Leo and his family are quite different from the normal, as most of them are mutants, I feel like at times, he might not exactly have enjoyed being different, but comes to terms with it, and takes pride in that fact.

“I'm an odd duck, darling and I'm proud to be

I'm an odd duck, darling, doesn't bother me

I'm a strange bird, baby, I'm the first to say

I'm a strange bird, baby, it's the only way”

Cats Dogs & Rats- The song itself is a commentary on modern society, dealing with a ‘cat’ who, drowning in the fast pace of life, finds himself powerless against the system as he is sentenced to life in prison. Knowing Leo has trouble with thinking he’s inadequate, He would likely feel like things are indeed moving too fast, and he can’t keep up. So, He’d probably enjoy this on a certain level, and while he’s not in the same situation as the MC of the song, he could relate to the relentless feeling of time racing by.

“Got lost, clowder, group of cats

Lost cause, louder, dogs in a pack

Yes boss, now sir, mischief of rats

Numbers matter, we’re all stats”

-David Bowie-

I believe it’s in the “Al Be Back” episode that Leo has that outfit that lowkey looks like Ziggy Stardust. So I had to put some Bowie songs in the playlist.

List of Bowie songs I put on the playlist:

Heroes-2017 remaster

Space Oddity-2015 remaster

Rebel Rebel-2016 remaster

Ziggy Stardust-2012 remaster

Rock ‘n Roll suicide-2012 remaster

I do in fact realize I can do an entire rant about how it would fit his character. I just don’t feel like it.

-Billy Joel-

On the topic of older music, I did put some Billy Joel songs. Why? Because I love his music. Also you cannot tell me Leo doesn’t relate to Vienna. Anyways, explanation time.

Vienna- Vienna is a song about life, and the crossroads you encounter. The first line is “slow Down you crazy child”

I feel Leo would really like this song, as he feels the need to be perfect. And, due to his inexperience as leader, he might feel the need to do everything all at once. I feel he needs the reminder that life is a journey, and it’s important to slow down and experience it.

“Slow down, you crazy child

You're so ambitious for a juvenile

But then if you're so smart

Tell me why are you still so afraid? Mm

Where's the fire, what's the hurry about?

You'd better cool it off before you burn it out

You've got so much to do

And only so many hours in a day, hey”

Moving out (Anthony’s song)- This song focuses on the aspirations of working and lower-class New Yorkers, the song puts into question the amount of effort it would take for the characters to achieve their own slice of the “American Dream.” I feel like that because they are self acclaimed “dirt poor” Leo might really ponder the american dream and the effort it takes to achieve it, and if it's even worth it.

“And it seems such a waste of time

If that's what it's all about

Mama, if that's movin' up then I'm movin' out

I'm movin' out, mmm mm

Ooh-ooh, uh-huh, mmm”

Only the good die young- I know this song is about Joel and this catholic girl but I thought the title of the song was ironic as he tried to sacrifice himself.

“Well, only the good die young

That's what I said

Only the good die young

Only the good die young”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Individual song timeee~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It’s called:Freefall by Rainbow Kitten Surprise- This song overall is about someone who spent their whole life trying to be a good friend to others, but is always resented and left alone. With nothing else left in his life, he turns to the devil for friendship, and even the Devil is unwilling and unavailable to him. Rather than turn the narrator to vice or put up a fight, the Devil pushes him further into despair, suggesting that he give up, commit freefall.

And while Leo doesn't really struggle much with friendships I Really feel like Leo would relate to this part:

“Don't get me ventin' on friends who resent you

'Cause all you've ever done is been a noose to hang on to

They thought was a necklace and reckless

They fell into Hell where you both hang with nothing to do but

Scratch, kick, let gravity win like

Fuck this, let gravity win like

You could leave it all behind”

Because yes, he does portray signs (not taking into account his self sacrifice) of depression/possible Suicidal thoughts. And he struggles with being emotionally vulnerable.

Afraid by The Neighborhood- We all know he has issues with self image, and how useful he can be to the group. This song, from my perspective, is worrying about if you’re enough, and if you’ll ever amount to anything, or be remembered. I know he definitely struggles with the same anxieties the song mentions, and thus I added it.

“When I wake up, I'm afraid

Somebody else might take my place x3

When I wake up, I'm afraid

Somebody else might end up being me

(Being me, being me)

Being me can only mean feeling scared to breathe

And if you leave me, then I'll be afraid of everything

That makes me anxious, gives me patience

Calms me down, lets me face this, let me sleep

And when I wake up, let me be”

A/N:I will post a part two, because I have much more to cover, I just haven't written it yet and I wanted to get something out. Feel free to add stuff and give advice in the comments! Reblogs are welcome :)

#rottmnt leo #rottmnt #rottmnt headcanons #rottmnt mikey #rottmnt raph #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt donnie #rottmnt essay #rottmnt leonardo #music #rottmnt and music #im tired #no beta we die like jason todd #i havent slept #rant #tw triggers #mentions of suicide #tmnt 2018

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vavandeveresfan · 1 year

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Can things stop disappointing me, please? Part 1.

Lore Olympus Episode 236 spoilers.

I saw (early) Lore Olympus’ episode 236 with Persephone and Hades alone in bed after their wedding (a fan has it on Youtube. Don’t unmute-- I never listen to the guy-- just watch).

For me, it was so passionless. Here’s 6 years of slow burn, and Hades was more horny and lustful for Perse in the first 20 episodes than on his wedding night.

I hated that they weren’t married in the clothes Hera had seen in her vision. I know they had to get married in a hurry, but still.

Plus, they’re in a hotel. Seriously? It would have been a wonderful way to complete the arc if they were back at Hades’ home in the Underworld, where Perse had first slept off being drunk. It would have come full circle, been more intimate, have more resonance.

The art has lost its unique, watercolor-like strangeness and is almost Disneyesque now. Is this because it may/may not be a Netflix series? Whatever the reason, I miss how it used to be.

Maybe the next ep will be better, perhaps we’ll see some passion, but I’m skeptical. I know the comic isn’t and won’t be graphic, but Smythe could at least give us some hint of the two having hot sex.

If you want an explicit, hot sex scene with the two, a fan has created a great one, IMO. Adults only.

#Lore Olympus #Persephone and Hades #Lore Hades #Lore Persephone #Hades #Persephone #hades and persephone #Lore episode 236

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grayintogreen · 1 year

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YCDHN LINER NOTES: Chapter Two

WHO'S READY TO DELVE INTO SOME ~MIND RAPE~ TERRITORY. So this chapter is a rough one emotionally and an exhausting tense action-packed drama bomb so like we're right out of the gate getting walloped with action compared to the slow burn of OUADYA. The stakes are higher here (though I will promise that Chapter Three is a breather ep). I do love a good breather ep.

SO LET'S GET INTO MY THOUGHT PROCESS. Put under a cut for people who haven't read yet.

[INCEPTION NOISE]

Lucien's Mindfuck sequences were planned out around the time I first started conceiving of this fic and were one of the clearest images I had. The idea of the Somnovem systematically digging through Lucien's mind to find something that could break him seemed like the most devious form of torture they could think up. Also it establishes that his connection to them goes both ways- he can sort methodically through the many minds of Cognouza, but he's just ONE mind and they're all working together to get into his.

Also it introduces a third layer to Cognouza- we have the flesh layer, the dream layer beneath it, and then Lucien's own mind, which has its own tiers. Gunshot gunshot cash register noise inception gong. No matter what happens, Lucien has been hooked into Cognouza so deeply and so long that he's like a secondary organ, so you can imagine why they're not happy to let go of their extra brain who is both liberated and snared at the same time.

The repeated refrain of "this isn't how it happens" is all Tamsyn Muir, and I will admit that reading Harrow the Ninth definitely contributed a lot to how those dream sequences played out.

I had a very specific image in mind for the opening scene of Lucien on the altar and it's basically Asuka's death scene from End of Evangelion- seen in screencap form here. What you can't see is her mind-linked giant robot being disemboweled while she's still synced to it. That's what I wanted the experience to feel like for him. The absolute helplessness of knowing this isn't happening to YOU but it feels like it is because your brain is processing it like it is.

Also I just don't think you can do a Mind Rape scene without referencing Eva just a bit once you've seen it. That shit sticks with you.

Incidentally, the commentaries on the old Eva movies are how I first learned about Taliesin Jaffe's existence and started idolizing his brain. It has been very strange several years realizing he's more than just a little guy talking about Babylonian myths in an audio commentary.

The ink splatter butterfly aspect of the Somnovem Omega (and boy do I just love making up new aspects to creepify them. I watch a lot of horror movies. My brain is scary) is based on The Darkness from the 1999 House on Haunted Hill remake, seen here:

Incidentally I cannot believe I found a gif of that.

The people chosen for Lucien's dream up until Gaudius throws in the dick move are all, in some form or fashion, his abusers or, in Derrin's case, just someone he thought didn't give him his due (which lead to leaving the Orders). There's a reason why Derrin was the first and least violent kill, whereas Lucien went to town on Reese and Dodger.

(He doesn't get to kill Vess because he never gets to kill Vess in this universe.)

It was important that Lucien resist the attempts to break him with his abusers and then crumble under the face of love, like if you accept that love is what makes people, then you have to accept that the opposite is true. Lucien's start of darkness began with Heather's death. There's a part of him that still rationalizes that he would have been fine if she had lived, but she didn't and that's HER fault, not his own for never processing it properly because he was a terrified child. And because he never processed that grief properly, of course that's going to be what gets him in the end- the idea that he could have her love and safety and not have to fight so hard anymore.

Go on and ask me again why I like my headcanon better than what's presented in the book. I THOUGHT VERY HARD ON IT.

THE HAPPY FUN BALL OF NIGHTMARES

You'll notice that I just went apeshit on the order of operations here- most of the stuff that happens in this chapter are things that happen in the Permaheart/Save Yussa plotline, which is going to happen, but I wanted a really dynamic fight scene to make the dragon more pressing since the Nein are level 12 right now, and the scribe mites and the froghemoths were cool.

Also I just refuse to be sensible about things that happen in canon and will absolutely shake them up. These are not the canon events you're looking for. Any resemblance is just me vibing with that and using it.

I know this whole fic is about contrived coincidences and fate pushing the Nein in a way, but I really did think that them stumbling upon the means for soul transference in ANY OTHER context would have been weird, but the HFB has already been established as having a really random connection to something they'll deal with later and Halas WAS trying to do immortality experiments and he'd need to know how to transfer souls to get his soul in one of his clone bodies.

But also I love the idea that the villains can manipulate events in their favor too and the fact that the Permaheart IS in there and it would fuck up their plans if the Nein found it adds a layer of hubris to the whole thing.

The "fantasy prepper" larder scene was just for fun but come on guys THE HFB IS BASICALLY A BOMB SHELTER. There's totally random ass canned food and freeze dried jerky in there along with his vegetable garden.

AND NOW LET'S TALK ABOUT THE LITTLE RED DOT. So I have thought a long time about that dot and I think everyone thinks it's meant to be Cognouza and it could be still, but Cognouza doesn't have a fixed location and it would have JUST HAPPENED when Halas constructed the Heirloom Sphere. Yeah, he was doing experiments in an astral dreadnought but the way he talks to Caleb suggests he's never seen the city in the astral sea. So what the fuck ELSE could it be.

Well, you'll notice Molly heard chains before he touched it and something Tharizdun-shaped happened to the Somnovem and Cognouza when the psychic storm hit, so I'm sure that's not important or anything.

And that does it for these liner notes unless anyone has [David Pumpkins voice] any questionssss... I will answer just about anything that isn't spoilery, honestly. I have a lot of thoughts.

#life in the margins of redemption #you can't deny high noon #liner notes #my writing

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joeonmusic · 2 months

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Beast Mode is out today!

Yesterday I held a listening party on Bandcamp to celebrate the release of my new EP, Beast Mode, and give people some insights into the songs. I thought I'd share my notes for those who couldn't make it, so you can read as you listen along. The EP is produced by Chris Marney (referred to as Chris throughout here).

Pass the puffer is the first track and I wrote the lyrics after reading about an episode of Spy in the Wild on BBC. It was narrated by David Tennant. In it, the dolphins pass round a puffer fish and get blissed out from small doses of the lethal toxins. I did a bit more research on dolphins and put something together that’s not supposed to be political or animal rights based, just observations of strange behaviour.

The music was written a while ago, and I added the guitar and dolphin samples a bit later. I think my producer did a good job in bringing out the bass notes a bit better than I had it in the original mix - that’s never my strongest point.

Fed to the tigers is probably the saddest song on the EP. Again, in terms of the music, the guitar was the last thing I added and I think it gives it an extra dimension with the tremolo weaving in and out. The lyrics explore how a zoo came to decide to kill a 2-year-old giraffe. Marius the giraffe was born at Copenhagen zoo, but he was from the same gene pool as too many other giraffes in European zoos so was no use for breeding the next generation and it costs money and requires space to keep such animals. They didn’t want to sell him to some private collector or a circus so decided the most humane thing was to kill him and feed him to the tigers. I don’t make a judgement, just think it’s a dilemma that’s worth thinking about…

Cyborg (broken animal) is up third and it’s less of a story than an exploration of these around adding technology to humans and animals. There’s a philosophical element to it in terms of how we should feel about experimenting with impulses going straight to the brain to control movements and things, plus a bit of a fear of what if it goes wrong and robot-insect armies start attacking us!

Musically it is the probably the closest to dance music through parts of it, although there’s a really brutal guitar solo in it to throw you off. You can hear what Chris did with the remix a bit later for a different take on the song.

Sweet Kiss of Death (or the story) was suggested to me by my Twitter friend Stephen Haggart. There was a horse (Sweet Kiss) that won a race, but the jockey died on his back some time before the end. I decided to write the song from the point of view of the horse who was henceforth nicknamed Sweet Kiss of Death.

I wrote the music for this a couple of years ago, but played around with it and added the weird talking bass sound to get away from it being too traditional a reggae sound. I’ve always loved reggae and those who’ve listened to my earlier albums will have heard elements in those from the genre. Also from my band at uni, we had a dub reggae stage, influenced by Boo Radleys and other 90s bands who added it into rock/indie.

The cyborg remix is not the first time my voice has been put through a decoder. The Invisible squirrel also did it with the remix of Trace in 2022: Listen here for that. I love what Chris did with this. It has a very different feel from my version, while still being recognisable. The guitar solo's gone, but there are some really gnarly synths to give that menace still.

Radioactive hybrid terror pigs was originally released in October 2022. It was the first song Chris mixed for me, so I thought I’d bring it back, as it was just a single, so has never been on Bandcamp. It was fast and punky all the way through before, so I slowed down the verses and chopped up the guitar line, adding a few synth elements, too.

I read a story about how the wild boars moved into the contaminated land without feeling any ill effects and made themselves at home, inter-breeding with the domesticated pigs that had been left behind in the desperate aftermath of the disaster. The title’s a little bit sensationalist, but when I read it, I just thought that has to be a song! Thematically it fits perfectly with this EP.

I hope you enjoy listening to the EP. Please buy a copy on Bandcamp if you can, or just share it with people who you think will like listening to it. Word of mouth and recommendations from friends are the best promo in the world.

#singer songwriter #indie music #songwriting #new music #electronic #cyborg #dolphins #zoo animals #sweet kiss #remix #radioactive

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gisatako · 2 years

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ep2, I'd like to go to Ana's and befriend Gren.

#still slow and strange but better than the first ep for me #why the laughs are so weird?#ana's atmosphere is cool though #is gren gonna comeback?? play a major role for a minute or two maybe??!!#i want more gren #netflix cowboy bebop #cowboy bebop

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sisterofleatherfrog · 3 years

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The Silence Brings Me Home

Hey! This is my first fanfic so I hope you all enjoy it! I was inspired by an illustration I saw of Crosshair sobbing and holding Lula for comfort (which I cannot find for the life of me, if I do eventually I’ll link it). I meant to get his done before ep. 11 Devil’s Deal (and especially before this week’s) because we still didn’t know what Cross looked like at that point, but I’m slow and here we are. There is some fanart I did at the end, I’ve only recently gotten back into drawing after a long time, so it might be a little rough sorry!

Summary: The Batch get Crosshair back, but what he has, and almost done haunts him. Comfort is given in the simplest of ways: by being presen for the healing.

Warnings: Mention of blood/injury, killing/murder. Heavy angst with comfort. Self loathing ideation.The beginnings of a family healing together from trauma.

Word Count: 2188

It was as close as it got to silent within the Havoc Marauder. The ship always faintly hummed as it cruised through space; the engines and various systems constantly working away in the background via a complicated web of technology and wiring, maintained by the Batch’s resident genius. Rumors were, if someone listened close enough as a ship passed through hyperspace, they could faintly hear the sound of the decillions of particles out there passing around the ship. Something like sand blasting the outside of the hull, but with a bell-like, ringing, song. It was that sort of silence that found all six of the inhabitants within the Marauder.

Tech, the aforementioned genius, was nursing a new goose egg on his forehead with a cold compress while attempting to repair a hairline fracture in one of his goggles lenses. Echo sat across from him helping to guide the nearly blind man in his endeavour. Besides a myriad of small cuts and new bruises, Echo’s left leg lay detached and balanced on his lap, waiting for attention from Tech for a recently smoking blaster hole through the calf. Laying in his bunk, Wrecker was also nursing a new blaster wound: the bolt having ripped through his armour and taken a chunk out of his right bicep. He lay quietly, making sure to stay off his wound so the bacta could do its work and trying to process the events of the day. Remembering the adrenaline and the genuine moment of fear he’d had, but smiling nonetheless. Foreword in the front of the ship, Hunter sat quietly, his face kriffing hurting, his nose having to have been reset after being knocked out of joint. He’d definitely taken a beating, he’d be feeling everything that currently hurt fivefold tomorrow, but the wounds could have been worse. Everything could have been much worse. What could have been was an ache that never faded and a silence that was never filled.

Hunter’s gaze slid to the seat beside him, looking at the small girl that had so quickly become a priority in his life. Omega was curled up on the seat, her arms and legs tightly squeezing Lula to her body while her eyes peaked over her knees to watch the blue of hyperspace. She had thankfully missed all the action this time, safely tucked away within the ship by a promise Hunter had made her swear. He looked over at her, thankful she and his vode were all together here, alive, and relatively in one piece. Still needing something to comfort him though, he reached over and ruffled Omega’s short blonde hair. Her eyes, brown like his, slid over to look at him and he could see a small smile curling at the edges of her mouth. She’d been incredibly worried at the state her family had been at their return, seeing them beaten, bloody, bruised, and punctured wasn’t something a kid should ever be exposed to. They were alive though, and…

Hunter turned his head a little, gazing into the back of the ship where, almost hidden in the furthest recess of the bunks, he could see a pair of long, thin legs encased in black armour. Omega followed Hunter’s gaze and that smile wavered some as nervousness played over her face. She was happy her family was alive and she was happy that her fathers’ brother had been brought back, but the fear of all that time being hunted lingered like a dark cloud on the horizon in her mind. Omega knew it wasn’t Crosshair’s fault. The chip wasn’t something that the host could reason with; locking them far away in the back of their own minds. From the little she could get from what she’d heard, he could be mean, but wasn’t inherently malicious. Everything he’d done in his hunt for them under the Empire was a stripped version of himself- the man was gone but the shrewd soldier remained.

…

Waking up in that dingy medbay was one of the most disorientating moments of Crosshair’s life. He was… a man again, something that thought independently from orders given. But good soldiers follow orders. He wasn’t a drone though. But you are a soldier... Yes, he was, but something else guided him, rather than his superiors he’d always looked elsewhere-

“He’s awake!” The call came from nearby, as did the sound of several pairs of feet rushing in. He knew that voice, but reacted on instinct to the people closing in and jerked his head up, ready to defend, no, attack- Hunter was there, the closest, he was one of his targets-

...So follow through.

No!

Revulsion rose so strongly within himself that everything in his mind that wasn’t his own shrank back like frightened animals, leaving him gasping with an acrid taste in the back of his mouth and a feeling of bile rising in his chest. Pitching sideways he landed gracelessly twisted on the metal floor and began heaving, unable to tell if anything came up at all; not able to remember when the last time he ate was, only feeling a burning in his stomach. Hands gently touched his back but he jerked violently, seeking to remove that touch even if it wasn’t a punishment. When was the last time he’d been given that understanding? When had somebody last cared that his body needed tenderness? It felt unnatural to him now, no longer familiar, and painful.

Voices filtered through as the haze of sickness cleared: “...scans indicate the procedure was a complete success and that he should recover the same as us. Crosshair’s reaction is due to something else entirely.” Tech, he’d know that voice always rattling away with statistics and diagnostics. He’d almost silenced it forever with a single shot- how long ago was that? How long had it been since the ion engine had left him broken and the Kaminoans had pieced him back together, fit him with an eye that didn’t quite measure up to his shooting one and left him always a little off balance?

“Crosshair? Vod?” Hunter now, “Are you with us?” Crosshair felt him kneel next to him and could see his concerned face in his peripheral vision now that his initial haze had begun to fade.

He considered himself for a moment now that the remains of whatever had been in his head were gone. “Yes, I’m here.” Physically, but everything felt so strange. He could hear Wrecker roaring something nearby, probably his loud approximation of a greeting, but he made no move to meet it, didn’t (couldn’t) move himself to. At this, Hunter motioned for him and the others to back off a little before speaking again. “That’s good, we finally caught you and your inhibitor chip is gone now. You’re going to be fine, we’ve got you.” Fine? After everything Crosshair really didn’t think so.

…

Despite the best possible outcome the Batch made their way back to the Marauder, from another downed Jedi cruiser they’d managed to locate thanks to Rex, in an unwieldy silence. Back on the ship they all finally began to address their variety of wounds, and Crosshair, seeing this, froze. This was all him. This was his fault. He had hurt his vod, brought them pain, tried to kill them. He felt sick again, felt as if he was dropping out of his body while his heart constricted painfully and began to race in a clumsy gallop. Crosshair stayed where he was in the back of the ship and sat while somebody got it under way, finally feeling the vague reeling in his gut from entering hyperspace.

It was quiet, nobody made a move to approach him yet. He didn’t know if he even wanted one of them to get close. Everything felt so wrong. He was wrong. What he’d done, betrayed and tried to murder his family, all because of an order?! Him, who flicked his toothpicks at commanders and belonged with a group of defective clones, couldn’t defy an order. Kriff him. One simple pull of a trigger and it could have been any one of them. If he hadn't missed, it could have been Tech’s brain matter splattered over the hull of a downed starship. His vod who was so much like an over-eagre younger sibling. Or Wrecker, who Crosshair had teased and soothed in equal measures in his life. Or Echo who, even though he wasn’t modified like the Batch, could never be normal again and Crosshair had learned to respect him as a brother. And Hunter… he couldn’t think it, couldn’t parse a world where he was dead, where he had been responsible for his death.

Kriff him. How did he- how did he go on alongside his brothers when he’d almost done that? When he’d always be haunted by the pitiless voice in his head (his own, that had ordered the death of innocents) that had repeated his mission as a mantra. He could scrub his skin forever with the harsh scourer he used to clean his armour, but this isn’t something he could wash away. Whether it be in the new scars that had accumulated on their bodies, or the cybernetic eye that now greets him in the mirror, there would be no losing this. No taking it back or making it better. He couldn’t- he should-

A black mass came into his sight and he jumped. Lula was being offered to him in two small hands. The girl, what was her name again? She’d spoken to him when they were all in the cell on Kamino together (the last time they were all together where he wasn’t trying to kill the rest of them). She’d told him it wasn’t his fault, had she known what was working against him in his head? It didn’t matter now. The girl-Omega, that was her name- watched him partially hidden behind the tooka doll with the eyes of his brothers.

“Here” She said, her kaminoan accent still strong after all the time she’d been running, “Wrecka’ lets me borrow her when I’m upset, I don’t think he’ll mind if you do too.”

Crosshair looked at the old, scuffed doll and noticed a stitch in grey forming a cuff on it’s left arm. It had been a dumb scuffle over his and Wreckers continual rivalry and it had ended up with Lula getting the worst of it. He’d stayed up all night trying to make his stitches even and neat, not wanting to ruin the doll. He touched those stitches, gently tracing the line they made before gently grasping it and curling forward, needing to wrap the aching sore that was himself around something. Omega slipped onto the seat next to him and leaned into his left, he wanted to flinch away but something about this gave him... grace. He’d ordered the men under him to aim for her fragile little body and yet here she was offering him comfort through it’s support.

What comfort did he deserve though? What did he deserve indeed. Crosshair gazed unseeingly at the floor, trying to piece the parts of him left scattered in a thousand memories together to once again become the man he was before all this. He startled again when another body suddenly pressed itself into his right side. He turned, a masque of death greeted him, etched into a face permanently carved stern, but the eyes- Hunter’s eyes reminded him of the rail-thin cadet he used to be, not built to fight off any clones who wanted to get a piece of him on his own. He wasn’t alone back then though, three other boys were always there to back him up, and they would patch each other’s wounds together in their quarters afterwards. Hunter, their de-facto leader, was always worried about the hits they’d taken, not relaxing until every bump was seen to and bandaged. It was that look again, that same look that said: ‘I’m staying right here until I know my brothers are going to be fine.’

Some more shuffling in the ship Tech and Echo came into view, the latter still short a leg and being supported over to sit across from him. They didn’t say anything, but Tech came and sat in front of Omega on the floor, letting himself rest against Crosshair’s legs. Echo didn’t move to touch him, but remained in his presence just the same and gently smiled, his posture relaxing to lean against the wall of the berth. Just visible from behind a corner, Wrecker gingerly turned over with his injury, meeting Crosshair’s gaze with a smile already there for him. His injury prevented him from rising, but he extended a large hand towards him from his bunk. He was too far to physically reach him, but the gesture translated anyway: ‘I’m here brother, I missed you, I was worried.’

The Marauder sang through hyperspace; no words were spoken by anyone aboard for a long time. But this silence was familiar, and even though he felt a long way from having earned it, Crosshair could understand it perfectly: ‘Welcome home.’

Here’s Crosshair as in the story, I thought it would be really cool if he and Wrecker had matching cybernetic eyes. I gave him his ep. 11 haircut though because it’s cool.

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rockinsappho · 3 years

Text

Last Words of a Shooting Star

Hey! first time ever uhhh posting any kinda writing hahaha but here u go! (Was gonna post on ao3 but I forgot my login nooo)

Notes: CONTAINS SPOILERS for ep 139! Check tags. Set during ep 139 during/right after the feast. Mostly canon compliant? Caleb has physical anxiety tells and essek is trans w chronic pain: this felt important to include as I love to project myself into my interpretation of who these characters are, anyways. Perhaps Ill write another similar fic focused on Beauyasha??

Tags: fluff, a bit of angst, we-might-die-tomorrow-angst, talk of death, discussing feelings, accidental telepathy but its all consensual dw, anxiety tics (like finger picking mentioned), first kiss, no beta we die like lucien,

(ALSO if there is something else I should have tagged, please let me know. I want to be conscious of others so I will def update it if there is something u feel is missing.)

----

“This could be our goodbye... Is there… anything we want to say to each other? Any warm words of encouragement, or things that we don't want to leave unsaid?”

Veth’s words hang heavy, silence filling the air. Sat around a campfire, Yasha looks toward Beau with sad eyes, and Jester leans on Fjord's shoulder. This is the Mighty Neins last night before the storm, before the whole world could change.

Caleb, however, was busy picking at his fingernails, acutely focused on anything but the others. It was too soon to say goodbye to the Nein. His friends, his… family. So he looked for minute distractions.

“I have lots of things I want to say; after we defeat Lucien,” Beau says, as the others chuckle softly. There is a strange tension in the air. As if even with Veth's words, there were still things not spoken aloud. Too many eyes watching them still. Even more-so with them now branded on their bodies.

“Cayyyleb,” Jester's voice rang out “Any confessions you need to get off your chest? Looove confessions? You are always so secretive.”

He smiled slightly as he brushed the loose strands of hair out of his face and looked up towards his friends, attempting to straighten his posture.

“Errm… there is not… particularly anything I would like to say, no,” Caleb replied. Taking a chance, he eyed Essek, who was also keeping quietly to himself. Always so serene and proper, draped in his mantle and robes. Sensing his gaze, Essek met his amber eyes. It was as if every moment they connected: time slowed. One moment lasted for hours, stretching millennials until there was nothing but the two of them-- together against time.

But there was no time. And there were not the two of them. There had been no conversations together of the constant pull they felt towards one another.

“We need more time.”

At that, Essek furrowed his brows, hearing Caleb's voice ring in his head. This was not the first time Caleb has accidentally sent his thoughts over to Esseks mind. With the eyes and their close proximity to one another, it only makes sense that there would be slip-ups. But it has become more and more frequent. Especially since Essek himself has branded an eye, he has noticed Caleb being a bit more… attentive to him. Not to say that Essek did not secretly appreciate such attention.

It does not help that Essek had sustained pretty serious injuries from the last battle, and was having a hard time staying on his feet. The floating, of course, helps to relieve the constant pain through his legs, but he has just been so exhausted. And Caleb noticed.

Oh, sweet Caleb, worrying for this traitor to the Dynasty-- this drow he barely knows. And yet, there is some unspoken connection between the two of them-- Essek could feel it in his bones.

And if they were going to die tomorrow, now would be the better time than any to tell Caleb how he truly feels. After all, if Caleb rejects him, he’ll be too dead to care. Now, Essek. Just tell him now.

“Ahem,” Essek clears his throat and stands. “I will ah- be back in a moment.”

The Mighty Nein turned to each other, confused at the sudden movement.

“Was it something I said?” Jester asked.

“Of course not Jester,” “Absolutely!” Fjord and Veth said at the same time.

Caleb's eyes held on to Esseks back as he floated towards the next room over, silk robes drifting softly through this strange astral sea.

“Caleb. Come, follow. I must discuss something of great importance that I do not wish to share with the group. “

A heartbeat skipped as Caleb heard his fellow wizard's voice in his head. He appreciated this sense of telepathy they both shared. Simultaneously though, he couldn't help but feel a twinge of guilt, as he was the one who dragged Essek into this in the first place. And now, branded with a red eye they know little about, he felt a new sense of responsibility for his dear mages safety.

When Caleb finally found some excuse to leave their camp to go find Essek, he had a lump in his throat. Fidgeting and picking at his hands, he approached Essek. He was sitting with his back against the wall, legs bent in front of him, and tending to his wounds gained in battle. Next to him was an open medicine pack and his spellbook turned to a simple cantrip, light, which he was using to illuminate the space around him to better see his wounds.

“Essek--” Caleb starts, suddenly unsure of his words. “Let me help you,” his voice is soft and tender as he knelt in front of his friend.

The drow looked up and smiled softly. “Thank you.” They held eye contact for a beat and then looked towards Esseks knees, still bruised and burned. “I ran out of bandages, I was hoping you carried some in your bags.”

Caleb let out a quick laugh, and lifted his hands, turning them around a little.

“Ja, I carried them for a long time. To cover these... Also, because of the constant fighting we find ourselves in. I’m not exactly err… strong.”

Essek smiled at that. “Me neither. Can you help me wrap them?”

“Ja. Of course.” His slightly shaking hands took the bandages from his pack and started to unroll some of the cloth. Caleb took a deep breath, filling his lungs to attempt to calm his nerves. “Was this, uh, what you called me over to talk about? You know Caduceus or Jester know better how to tend to wounds than I do.” He let out a nervous laugh again and started wrapping the cloth around his leg.

“Ah-” Essek scrunched up his face and winced at the pain, looking to the side. Caleb’s hands immediately stopped, save for the slight tremor still present.

He looked up at Essek’s face with worry. “I’m sorry.”

“Ah..” Essek began calmly, clenching and unclenching his hands. “I am used to pain. And-- no this was not what I wanted to talk about although, I do appreciate your help. Sincerely.” He looked over to meet Caleb’s eyes. A beat.

“Scheisse, you are beautiful.”

Essek looked down as he heard the other’s voice ring through his ears. Do it now.

“Caleb, I don’t- If we- If I die tomorrow, I want to die knowing that I have aired all of my grievances. My sins. My… thoughts. I want to die with everyone-- with you knowing everything about me possible. I don’t want to just disappear in the memories of you all--”

Caleb stops wrapping his legs and interrupts “Liebling, what are you going on about? I will never forget you, Essek. And we both have sins we have yet to atone. You know your sins are not of importance to me. The only thing of importance to me is how you have treated me, the Nein, all of us--”

“The only thing of importance to me is you!”

Time slowed again. It was either Dunamancy or the butterflies in his stomach. Essek’s eyes went wide as he realized what slipped through his lips. He had said it with such conviction, he did not even realize how quickly it came out. He had spent hours thinking of how to eloquently profess his complex feelings towards the other wizard. And now…

Essek started to remove Caleb's hand’s from his knees, suddenly aware of how close they were sitting towards one another. “I’m sorry Caleb, I-”

Caleb quickly set his hands on top of Essek’s to still them, looking back into his icy blue eyes, mouth unmoving.

“You are the most important to me as well.”

“Did you mean to send that message this time?” Essek asks softly, careful of his next moves.

“Ja. And the other ones too.” There was a slow moment where Essek could have sworn Caleb's eyes drifted from his own to his lips.

“Caleb. I don’t want to die before I’ve kissed you.”

“Then don’t.”

Caleb lifted a trembling hand to cup Essek’s face, running his thumb across his cheek. Flushed, Essek closed the distance and finally embraced in a kiss. It was an awkward angle at first, as Caleb was leaning over his injuries, careful not to touch any part of him that would cause further pain. But Essek was seeing stars, it had been everything he had ever dreamed of. All of the euphoria he had ever felt from the social power he had gained through treachery-- he would throw it all away for just ten more seconds with Caleb-- no, five, no three seconds. He would give away his all for a single moment more.

Gently they pulled back from another. Overwhelmed in emotion, the human laughed and rested his forehead on Essek’s.

“It has been a long time since--” Caleb begins.

“Me too. We will learn together, as we have in the past, like we always do.” Essek quickly kissed Caleb on the nose. “That tower of yours sounds awfully nice tonight. A warm room, warm bed. Perhaps it will be a good night of sleep for all of us after all.”

Caleb nestled his face into Essek’s neck, sighing. “We should probably get back to the group. They will wonder why we have been gone so long. One more kiss before we go?”

Essek smiled and grabbed his face in his hands, pulling him close.

“We have all the time in the world.”

#AYYEEEEE #WE POSTEDDDD #im so nervous act posting this if u could just uhh #lemme know if u like it #if u dont pls dont tell me id cry haahah #anywasy #WOOOOO #yay for finishing something #shadowgast #critical role #cr spoilers #critical role spoilers #critical role fanfic #shadowgast fanfic #Caleb widowgast #essek thelyss #shadowhand essek

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dimples-of-discontent · 3 years

Note

How are you doing?

Hello anonymous friend,

First off, thanks for asking! It’s so easy to feel that you’re just reblogging content into the void, especially since the main kind I used to write myself--quick turnaround metas based on eps that had just aired, spec about the direction of the season, analysis and squee about Cockles antics at cons--have all been pretty much impossible since November. I miss content creation, but I also still really appreciate being on here as a community. I know it’s definitely changed in character since the finale, but that’s to be expected. I wave to all the new neighbors from my only middling-old rocking chair on a porch (hilarious that this is true in this fandom but 6 years is a relative newbie).

Also, I’m doing about as well as can be given all the still very tough world and life circumstances. Readers of this blog may know that I’ve been living with stage 4 breast cancer (that’s the type that has spread elsewhere--bones, lungs, and liver for me--and is treatable but incurable) for almost 2.5 years now. I have to go to chemo nearly every week, have lost every single hair on my body (including eyebrows, eyelashes, and NOSE HAIRS which is so much more fucking annoying than you can imagine, especially in allergy season), and feel mildly hungover without drinking like half the time from side effects. But, that said, the treatment I’ve been on since October has had good results at slowing the spread, so I’m cautiously optimistic. I do have a cancer side-blog @pitiless-achilles-wept if you want to follow for updates. I don’t post a ton, but I do offer reflections on illness and disability too.

In the meantime, I got a big promotion at work (b/c I still work full-time) and that’s really wonderful. As I and people I know get vaccinated it feels like things are looking up because (as I said back in January) it hardly seems like there’s any other way for them to go.

I miss the more personal interactions I used to have on here when I had more time and when the meta and spec communities were thriving, but I want to say that I see you all when you show up in my notes and my inbox and that it always makes my day better. I am genuinely the worst at answering asks these days (b/c treatment + work means a pretty low energy level) but I see you, and I am grateful to you. And hope you all are doing well too, here in this strange social world of tumblr dot com dot gov dot edu.

Love, Bex

#asks #nice people #not dead yet #my life as a cancer patient #life update #sorta #tumblr friends #tumblr life #bex writes

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sinceileftyoublog · 3 years

Text

30 (Technically 34) Albums We Loved That Happened To Come Out in 2020

So much has already been said and written about this cursed past year, but a few good things came out of it, including the music. Album-wise, like many before it and many to come, it was an embarrassment of riches. But even with so much time on our hands to devour new tunes, it was often old favorites, songs of comfort or familiarity that garnered the heaviest rotation. For many artists, too, it was a year ripe for revisiting or reissues of old material, looking at existing songs with fresh and new perspectives. Simply put, with so much to listen to, new and old, the prospect of ranking a finite number of albums felt not only daunting, but frankly a bit stupid. Maybe we were late to the game, but 2020 taught us that music should and can be appreciated in multiple contexts, not limited to but including when it first came out and when it was heard again and again, even if years later. The records below--listed in alphabetical order--happened to be released in some form in 2020, whether never-before-heard or heard before but in a different format. And the only thing I know is that we’ll be listening to them in 2021 and beyond.

Autechre - SIGN & PLUS (Warp)

The legendary British electronic music duo surprise released SIGN a mere month and a half after its announcement and then PLUS 12 days later. The former was a beatific collection of soundscapes that belied the band’s usual harsh noise, while PLUS embraced that noise right back, drawing you in with the clattering chaotic burbles of opener “DekDre Scap B” and lurching forward. -Jordan Mainzer

Against All Logic - 2017-2019 (Other People)

The perennially chill ambient house artist Nicolas Jaar had a busy 2020, as usual, releasing two albums under his name, Cenizas and Telas. But it was 2017-2019, the follow-up to the debut album from his Against All Logic moniker, that came first and throughout the year helped to illustrate Jaar’s penchant for combining inspired samples with club beats and tape hiss. Take the way the lovelorn vocals of “Fantasy” or soulful coos of “If Loving You Is Wrong” war skittering, scratchy percussion and cool arpeggios, respectively: Jaar is coming into his own as a masterful producer almost a decade after he released his first full-length. Oh, and bonus points for including none other than Lydia Lunch on a banger so blunt it would make Death Grips blush. - JM

Bartees Strange - Live Forever (Memory Music)

Like many, my introduction to Bartees Strange was through Say Goodbye to Pretty Boy, his EP of The National covers. Creativity and shifting perspectives shine through each song’s reimaging, like flipping the coarse, almost manic “Mr. November” into something softer, more meditative. It felt like a mere peek into what was to come on Live Forever. Bartees Strange is a world-builder. Each track on his debut unfolds and welcomes you to a wildly engaging tableau, a fully constructed vision. “Jealousy” opens with soft vocals and birdsong. “In a Cab” is the slick soundtrack to racing through a cityscape in the rain, seeing the blurred lights of the high-rises above as you pass by. “Kelly Rowland” warps wistful pop song feelings. “Flagey God” takes you into a dark, pulsing club while only a few songs later, “Fallen For You” wraps you in echoed vocals and romantic, raw acoustic guitar.

It’s an accomplishment to craft an album of individual songs that stand strongly on their own but still feel cohesive. 2020 wasn’t all bad. It gave us Live Forever, a declaration of an artist’s arrival. - Lauren Lederman

Charli XCX - how i’m feeling now (Atlantic)

Back in the spring, many of us wondered who would put out something great in 2020’s quarantine. It was hard to imagine that the intensity of a global pandemic would really allow for artists to embrace creativity. That thought carries the same eye-roll inducing feeling of “We’ll get some great punk music out of a Trump presidency,” but of course, Charli XCX delivered. Through live workshops with fans and longstanding collaborators, she delivered songs to dance alone to in your bubble. Charli embraces the unknown of the moment but clutches onto what’s familiar. Under the glitch-pop veneer of the album, she digs into the anxieties of not just this moment of time but of the bigger questions we all confront: trajectories of relationships with friends, romantic partners, ourselves. Album standouts “forever” and “i finally understand” embrace that feeling of both looking for control and accepting the lack of it. Charli is a master at balancing this. - LL

Christine and the Queens - La Vita Nuova (Because Music)

Named after a Latin text by Dante Alighieri about missing a woman who has died, Chris’ La Vita Nuova is not about mourning a death but instead about loneliness and isolation, post-relationship or otherwise. It doesn’t bang quite like her previous two albums, but it hits harder than ever.

Read our full review here.

Dogleg - Melee (Triple Crown)

Released on March 13th, right as the COVID-19 pandemic hit, Melee was supposed to be supported by three cancelled tours–SXSW, an opening slot for Microwave, and an opening slot for Joyce Manor–and an appearance at this year’s cancelled Pitchfork Music Festival. Listening to the songs on the record, you can only imagine how they translate: the jerky momentum of “Bueno”, build-up of “Prom Hell”, gang vocals of “Fox”, clear-vocal anthem of “Wrist”, and odd groove of “Ender”.

Read “Buckle Up, Motherfucker”, our interview with Dogleg.

Dua Lipa - Future Nostalgia & Dua Lipa/The Blessed Madonna: Club Future Nostalgia (Warner)

Where Dua Lipa’s much-anticipated second album Future Nostalgia succeeded was in its disco anthems and retro, club-ready beats, so who better to bring out the best of the record than The Blessed Madonna? The turntablist masterfully curates a mix of heavy hitters of the charts and the underground that not only offers an essential complement to Future Nostalgia but transcends it. Sending the tracks out to various producers and singers for features and then adding her own samples on top, she invites you to peel back the layers, enter a YouTube rabbit hole of sample searching as much as bopping along.

Read our full review here.

Emma Ruth Rundle & Thou - May Our Chambers Be Full (Sacred Bones)

Roadburn Festival has long been on my bucket list, and since the pandemic showed me how much live music can be taken away in a flash, when it’s safe again to travel and go to a festival, I may just pull the trigger and go--especially considering it’s the springboard for such fruitful and inspired collaborations as the one between Louisville singer-songwriter Emma Ruth Rundle and Baton Rouge sludge dwellers Thou. Rundle embraces the heavier opportunities on the follow-up to her incredible 2018 record On Dark Horses with the ever-flexible Thou backing her up vocally and instrumentally. Slow-burning opener “Killing Floor” offers a familiar introduction to fans of both--sort of what a Rundle/Thou song would sound like--before grunge chugger “Monolith” introduces huge, catchy riffs and “Out of Existence” a True Widow-esque dirge, newfound inspirations for both artists bringing the best out of each other. - JM

Fiona Apple - Fetch the Bolt Cutters (Epic)

What makes Fetch the Bolt Cutters stand out among Apple’s catalog and music in general is the clarity with which Apple seethes at those who have wronged her, whether ex-boyfriends or patriarchal oppressors, and looks to her relationships with other women for peace of mind.

Read our full review here.

HAIM - Women in Music Pt. III (Columbia)

For HAIM, the title Women in Music Pt. III is suggestive that, more than their previous two records, their third centers around the experiences of being an all-female band in a historically white cis male-dominated scene, at least one that wouldn’t call catchy riffs written by a man “simple” or call attention to the faces a man makes while playing. What it doesn’t let on to is how deeply personal the record is, how, by unabashedly embracing genres and styles of music that they love, HAIM have made far and away their best album. Co-produced by the usual suspects, Danielle Haim, Ariel Rechtshaid, and ex-Vampire Weekender Rostam Batmanglij, it’s instrumentally and aesthetically dynamic and diverse, consistently earnest without devolving into cheese.

Read our full review here.

Irreversible Entanglements - Who Sent You? (International Anthem)

I’ve been captivated by Irreversible Entanglements ever since I first saw them at Pitchfork Music Festival 2018. The radical poetry of Camae Ayewa (aka Moor Mother) is the perfect front for a ramshackle mix of Luke Stewart’s spidery bass, Tcheser Holmes’ weighty drums, and a horn section that concocts tones that range from hopeful to desperate. At their best, Who Sent You? is a shining example of celebratory Afrofuturism and metaphysics that makes the urgency of Ayewa’s more concrete and political words all the more necessary. “No Más”, composed by Panamanian-born trumpeter Aquiles Navarro, is a declaration against imperialist oppression, while the stunning title track flips the switch like a Kara Walker painting, as Ayewa’s the one interrogating the police officer terrorizing her community. “Who sent you?” she repeats, never spiraling, grabbing a hold of the power and never letting go. - JM

Jeff Parker - Suite for Max Brown (International Anthem/Nonesuch)

It’s Jeff Parker’s mom’s turn. After 2016′s The New Breed ended up being a tribute to the guitarist’s father, who passed away during the making of it, Parker decided to pay tribute to Maxine while she was still alive. Suite for Max Brown (Brown is his mother’s maiden name; Max is what people call her) is a genre-bending collection of tracks inspired by Parker’s DJing, juxtapositions of sequenced beats with improvisation that certainly sound like the brainchild of one individual. Indeed, Parker plays the majority of the instruments on it and engineered most of it at home or during his 2018 Headlands Center residency in Sausalito, CA; though all of the players and the vocalist (Jeff’s daughter Ruby Parker) on The New Breed show up, plus a couple trumpeters (piccolo player Rob Mazurek and Nate Walcott of Bright Eyes) and cellist Katinka Kleijn, Suite for Max Brown is a distinctly Jeff Parker record.

Read our preview of Jeff Parker & The New Breed’s set at Dorian’s last year.

Jeff Rosenstock - NO DREAM (Polyvinyl)

Jeff Rosenstock throws us right into the spinning, manic energy of NO DREAM, his latest release from a seemingly endless well of music that never lacks urgency. It’s a reminder that though it’s been a strange year, the issues Rosenstock tackles here aren’t new. There’s no interest in making you feel comfortable here. On the album’s title track, Rosenstock sings, lulling you into a false sense of security, “They were separating families carelessly / Under the guise of protecting you and me.” But reality sets in, and the hazy guitars spin out as he spits, “It’s not a dream!” and, “Fuck violence!”

My image of Jeff Rosenstock in the year 2020 is masked up with “Black Lives Matter” scrawled across the fabric of his mask in Sharpie, performing album highlight “Scram!” on Late Night with Seth Meyers as high energy as ever. It felt like watching someone send out a beacon, both a distress signal and a call to arms. - LL

Jessie Ware - What’s Your Pleasure? (PMR/Friends Keep Secrets/Interscope)

I am not someone who goes to clubs. I don’t “go out dancing,” preferring to let loose in the privacy of my own home or a trusted friend’s house party. But Jessie Ware’s What’s Your Pleasure? makes me think I could embrace a night out like that, once the world opens up again, of course. The album is filled with syncopated disco beats that feel fresh and classic all at once. The abundant horns and strings on “Step Into My Life” are decadent, like light bouncing off sequins in a dark room. Ware’s voice is slinky and velvety one moment, windswept like her album cover the next. It’s songs like “Save a Kiss” that embrace both, allowing her to show off her range. - LL

Laura Marling - Song for Our Daughter (Partisan)

With sparse production, mostly from her but with additions from Ethan Johns and Dom Monks, Marling foregoes the comparative maximalism of the Blake Mills-produced Semper Femina, her last proper full-length, and 2018′s LUMP collaboration. The songs aren’t simple, but they’re succinct, and every element, from Marling’s finger-picked guitars, the occasional slide guitar, and that unmistakably calm voice, sometimes alone and sometimes layered, fits. It’s her most universal set of songs yet, centering around the times when we’re apart from one another but reflecting on when we were together and when we might be together again, with no guarantees.

Read the rest of our review here.

Les Amazones d’Afrique - Amazones Power (Real World Records)

The groovy pan-African collective expands upon their debut Republique Amazone and then some with Amazones Power, a tour-de-force statement of female empowerment in the face of oppression against women throughout the African diaspora. Indeed, the album is more than just songs boldly decrying FGM, though those demands ring heavily. Instead, the group goes further, delving into gender power structures in marriage on “Queens” and selectively finding strength in tradition on “Dreams”. And this time, they include men to stand alongside with them. “Together we must stand / Together we must end this,” sings Guinean musician/dancer/artist Niariu on opener “Heavy” in solidarity with features Douranne (Boy) Fall and Magueye Diouk (Jon Grace) of Paris band Nyoko Bokbae. But perhaps it’s her kiss-off on “Smile” that hits hardest: “I shut up for no one.” - JM

Lianne La Havas - Lianne La Havas (Nonesuch)

The British singer-songwriter’s much anticipated follow-up to 2015′s Blood was better than I could have ever imagined. A song cycle about life cycles--of nature, of lives, of a relationship--inspired by an actual breakup, Lianne La Havas is a contemporary neo soul masterpiece. Overview opener “Bittersweet” is an instant earworm, La Havas’ coo-turned-belt filling the space between classic and increasingly emotive slabs of piano and guitar. Funky, lovestruck strut “Read My Mind” is the soundtrack for the unbridled confidence of finding new love. Yes, the doubts begin to sow on the fingerpicked melancholy of “Green Papaya” and “Can’t Fight”, and where the album goes from a simple narrative perspective may be predictable: They break up, they don’t get back together, La Havas enjoys her independence. But the depth of the arrangements and assuredness of La Havas’ singing is a product of an artist starting to really show us what she can do. And how many people can pull off a Radiohead cover like that? - JM

Lomelda - Hannah (Double Double Whammy)

What does it mean to title an album after yourself? Lomelda’s latest album is centered around discovering more about yourself while not always having the answers. Despite the lyrical content, the album is self-assured. Hannah Read’s voice feels as steady as ever as it navigates these twisting questions, like the way the world can shift after a kiss. She finds power in softness and reflection throughout the album, like when she explores the mantra-like words of “Wonder” or through a reminder to do no harm in “Hannah Sun”. In a year that allowed for perhaps more reflection than usual, Hannah makes space for the questions that arise out of figuring yourself out, of making sense of the messiness of it all, wrapped in warm guitar, balanced vocals, and steady drums. - LL

Moses Sumney - Grae (Jagjaguwar)

“Am I vital / If my heart is idle? / Am I doomed?” Moses Sumney famously sang on his stunning 2017 debut Aromanticism, an album that saw him developing his acceptance of being alone. grae, his two-part 2nd full-length, and his first since officially moving from L.A. to the Appalachian Mountains of Asheville, North Carolina, doubles down on themes of heartbreak, but instead of being sure in his seclusion, he embraces the unknown. The album teeters between interludes of platitudes about isolation and ruminations on failed human connection, and maximally arranged clutches of uncertainty. “When my mind’s clouded and filled with doubt / That’s when I feel the most alive,” Sumney coos over horns and piano on slinky soul song “Cut Me”; it’s an effective mantra for the album.

Read the rest of our review here.

Norah Jones - Pick Me Up Off The Floor (Blue Note)

At the time we previewed Norah Jones’ 7th studio album, she had only released a few tracks from it. Turns out the rest was just as powerful. From the blues stomp of “Flame Twin” to the rolling piano stylings of “Hurts to Be Alone”, Pick Me Up Off The Floor is an album full of jazzy orchestrations and soul and gospel-indebted arrangements, Jones’ silky, yearning voice tying together the simple, yet lush and deep instrumentation. And that other Tweedy feature, that closes the album? It’s a heartbreaking portrait of loneliness, one of many on a record that still manages to celebrate being alive all the while. - JM

Phoebe Bridgers - Punisher (Dead Oceans)

Phoebe Bridgers is a master of details. Her lyrics shine when they get specific. They range from the mundane to morbid: A superfan’s ghost-like wandering under a drugstore’s fluorescent lights, a skinhead likely buried under a blooming garden, reckoning with the you in “Moon Song”’s lines, “You are sick, and you’re married / And you might be dying.” Bridgers has always been able to set a scene meticulously, and Punisher arrived with 11 songs that expanded that skill, both lyrically and musically, with her dark humor intact and a fuller sound that includes her boygenuis collaborators’ harmonies. - LL

PJ Harvey - To Bring You My Love: The Demos & Dry - The Demos (Island)

Yes, revisiting Dry’s demos as a separate entity is still worthwhile. Harvey’s powerhouse vocal performance carries the acoustic strummed “Oh My Lover”, while the comparatively minimal arrangement of “Victory” highlights bluesy riffing, call-and-response harmonies, and layered guitar and vocals. The singles, the slinky and sharp “Dress” and propulsive anthem “Sheela-Na-Gig”, hold up to their ultimate studio versions, too. But it’s the To Bring You My Love material that provides novelty because it’s never been released and more so because it encompasses the greatest aesthetic contrast from the album. From the warbling hues and guitar lines of the title track to the tremolo haze of “Teclo” to the crisp snares of “Working With The Man”, the demos show a continuity and level of cohesiveness with the diversity of Dry and Rid of Me not shown on the studio version of Harvey’s more accessible commercial breakout. (Predictably, the album’s most well-known song, “Down by the Water”, is the closest to its eventual version.) “Long Snake Moan” is simultaneously more spacious and more noisy, its garage blues a total contrast to the lurking “I Think I’m A Mother” and swaying shanty “Send His Love To Me”. And “The Dancer” fully embraces its flamenco influences, hand claps and all.

Porridge Radio - Every Bad (Secretly Canadian)

Is there a better opening line than “I’m bored to death, let’s argue”? That kind of duality is found across all of Every Bad as it grapples with the frustrations and anxiety of trying to figure it all out, whatever that might mean for you. “Maybe I was born confused, but I’m not,” vocalist Dana Margolin repeats throughout the opening track, roping in listeners with the dizzying feeling of trying to make sense of yourself. The band’s guitar and synth sound coupled with Margolin’s howl makes for a dance party filled with dread, rendering Margolin’s already strong, repetitive lyrics even more spiraling. And yet, by the time we get to “Lilacs”, a glimmer of something else shines through as the music gets more manic and Margolin’s voice begins to soar: “I don’t want to get bitter / I want us to get better / I want us to be kinder / To ourselves and to each other.” - LL

Sault - Untitled (Rise) & Untitled (Black Is) (Forever Living Originals)

Yes, Black Is still pulls plenty of devastating punches. “Eternal Life”, a segue from the gospel boost of “US”, juxtaposes a deliberate drum beat with zooming synths, both ascending like a chorus of angels, as they sing, “I see sadness in your eye / ‘Cause I know you don’t wanna die,” presenting the oppression of Black life at the hands of white supremacy in inarguable terms. Ultimately, though, it’s the anthemic nature of the songs, resistant of platitudes, that shines through. “Nobody cared / This generation cares,” says Laurette Josiah on “This Generation”. Whether she’s talking about young people in general or the latest generation of young Black leaders, the sentiment is reflected on songs like “Black”, wherein over dynamic, sinewy instrumentation, the singers alternate between encouragement, support, and love of the self and others.

Read our full review here.

Shamir - Shamir (self-released)

Shamir’s voice is a bright beacon in a sea of conventional singers. Shamir captures the effervescence of pop music and weaves it together with elements of country, alt rock, and diary confessional lyrics all supported by the emotion and range of his vocals. There’s something for everyone across the album’s 11 shimmering tracks. Lead single and opener “On My Own” feels like a declaration of self and self-sufficiency, an anthem of a breakup song. The almost pop-punk bounce of “Pretty When I’m Sad”, paired perfectly with lines like the angst-ridden, “Let’s fuck around inside each other’s heads,” feels impossible to not bop along to. The twang of “Other Side” would put a country crooner to shame. That’s the power of Shamir. His voice has the ability to smoothly convey joy, resilience, and humor. He uses elements of several genres, not just the dance-pop of his debut, to build a unique album that gives listeners so much to sift through and, of course, dance to. - LL

Songhoy Blues - Optimisme (Fat Possum)

If Songhoy Blues’ second album Resistance lacked “the grit of its predecessor,” it’s clear from the hard rock stomp of the opening track of Malian band’s third album Optimisme that they rediscovered their mojo. More importantly, they couple this maximal brashness with tributes to those who make their world a better place: fighters for freedom, women, the young. It’s perhaps the first Songhoy Blues record to truly combine the celebratory nature of their desert blues with a balanced mixture of idealism and vigor. - JM

Spanish Love Songs - Brave Faces Everyone (Pure Noise)

How can you find hope in hopelessness, or optimism when every news story points to cruelty? Is it naïve to keep searching for light in the dark? I don’t think so, and I don’t think Spanish Love Songs does, either. I’d like to think we both believe that’s not naivety, but power. It’s the embers you need to really ignite a flame. After all, this is the band with a song titled “Optimism (As a Radical Life Choice)”. It’s a band whose crunching guitars and earnestness insist that despite death and depression and addiction, the instinct to survive shines brightly above all. That relentless hope resurfaces across Brave Faces Everyone’s 10 tracks even as it works through the bleakness of everyday life. - LL

Tashi Dorji - Stateless (Drag City)

The magnum opus from the Asheville-based picker is a group of evocatively titled, disorderly songs about the desolate hellscape of America for outsiders and immigrants. Enigmatic in its nature, not exactly narrative, Stateless combines Dorji’s urgent strumming with moody motifs, captured beautifully in a studio setting for maximum emotional wallop. - JM

Touche Amore - Lament (Epitaph)

Is this what an almost uplifting Touche Amore album sounds like? It’s cathartic in a newer way for the band, especially after the beautifully rendered grief of Stage Four. Lament loses none of the band’s aggression or urgency. “Come Heroine” thrusts listeners into that urgency and introduces a moment of warmth, Jeremy Bolm’s vocals still rasping and insistent: “You brought me in / You took to me / And reversed the atrophy.” The bounciness of “Reminders” may seem close to optimism, but a sharper look at the lyrics uncovers more than blindly looking to the things that bring joy. “I’ll Be Your Host” is reflective, a few years removed from Touche Amore’s previous album and the immediacy of loss, self-aware and growing, but still raw. The album closer, “A Forecast”, takes a turn, a lone voice and piano acting as a confessional before giving way to thrashing guitars and the realization that growth and reckoning with trauma doesn’t mean minimizing it. It means learning to keep moving forward and to stop for help when you may need it. - LL

Waxahatchee - Saint Cloud (Merge)

The best album yet from Katie Crutchfield is inspired by positive personal change (getting sober, dealing with codependency issues, her blossoming love with singer-songwriter Kevin Morby) and reflections on family and friends. Named after the suburb of Orlando where her father’s from, Saint Cloud is a genre-hopping collection of stories and feelings that doesn’t necessarily follow any semblance of narrative. On opener “Oxbow” and country-tinged ditty “Can’t Do Much”, Crutchfield’s increasingly aware of the need to pick your side and your battles, whether in the relationship between two people or between the allure of the bottle and the next-day hangover. Some of the best songs on the album see her finding commonalities with others as a means towards self-love. Gentle strummer “The Eye” refers to her natural creative relationships with Morby and her sister Allison. “War” she wrote for herself and best friend, who is also sober, the title a metaphor for one’s fight to remain substance-free. “Witches” is an ode to her best friends, including Allison and Snail Mail’s Lindsey Jordan, all equally frustrated by the toxic nature of the music industry and the world at large, ultimately lifting each other up because they simply have each other.

Read our full review here.

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passionate-reply · 3 years

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This week on Passionate Reply: We all know “Don’t You Want Me,” but the early Human League is a totally different beast, featuring a different line-up, and songs about killer clowns and wanting to be a skyscraper, on their debut LP, 1979′s Reproduction. Transcript below the break!

Welcome to Passionate Reply, and welcome to Great Albums. In this installment, we’ll be investigating one of the most surprising debut LPs around: The Human League’s Reproduction, first released in 1979.

Pretty much anyone with a general understanding of Western pop will already know the name of the Human League, and associate them, rightfully, with their early 80s hits like “Don’t You Want Me.” For many, the Human League were the first genuine synth-pop that they had ever heard, and their work in the 1980s has been immeasurably influential in bringing the notion of electronic pop into the mainstream. But before they were hitmakers and game-changers, the Human League were a very different band.

Music: “Being Boiled”

“Being Boiled” was the first thing the Human League would ever press to wax, way back in 1978. In most respects, this track is everything that “Don’t You Want Me” is not: its pace is languid, its structure is shapeless and meandering, and rather than a simple and relatable love story, its lyrics offer us a strange and opaque condemnation of the tortures endured by silkworms during textile production. While fascinating, and endearing in its own morbid way, “Being Boiled” does not exactly scream “hit record.” The Human League were not only a different band in a stylistic sense, but also with respect to their personnel, driven by a creative core comprised of budding synthesists Martyn Ware and Ian Craig Marsh. Prior to the release of the breakthrough album Dare, Marsh and Ware would abandon the group over creative differences, and go on to form Heaven 17 instead. It was vocalist Phil Oakey, and producer Martin Rushent, who would create the sound that their name is now so strongly associated with, and this early incarnation of the group is probably best thought of as an entirely different entity. This album, Reproduction, was their first full-length release, and is perhaps the best introduction to their pioneering sound.

Music: “Circus of Death”

“Circus of Death” had appeared as the B-side to “Being Boiled,” and was included once more as the second track on *Reproduction.* It has a lot in common with the other track it accompanied: a plodding pace, a dark and obtuse lyrical theme, and a sparse, fully electronic instrumentation. The Human League were among the first British groups to utilize a totally electronic sound, devoid of any traditional instruments besides the voice, though in this underground and more experimental context, it doesn’t present a threat to the status quo of pop the way that Dare would a few years later. Alongside fellow proto-industrial acts associated with "the Sound of Sheffield," like Clock DVA and Cabaret Voltaire, they dwelt on the fringes of good taste, crafting subversive music for subversive people. “Circus of Death” introduces us to a demonic figure called “the Clown,” who controls, and torments, human beings by use of a drug called “Dominion,” in a scenario that sounds a bit like Huxley’s Brave New World. It’s worth remembering that while younger generations are quick to think of clowns as icons of evil and terror, clowns were unironically beloved as bringers of joy for most of the 20th Century, and these early portrayals of clowns as killers were indeed shocking at the time. Preceding “Circus of Death,” and opening the album, is “Almost Medieval,” a track with some similar themes, but a rather different composition.

Music: “Almost Medieval”

While “Circus of Death” is slow and dirgelike, “Almost Medieval” showcases the more aggressive side of *Reproduction.* It opens the album with a starkly simplistic tick-tocking beat, reminiscent of an unaccompanied metronome, before bursting into its punk-like sonic assault--a musical representation of how seemingly predictable and deterministic machines can also create something outrageous and unexpected. The lyrics of this track seem pointed towards the past, with the narrator exclaiming that they “feel so old,” and as if they’ve died many times before. Juxtaposed against the thoroughly modern setting of an airport with tarmacs and jet engines, it might be taken as an expression of the horror a person from the past might feel if they were shown the world of the future, created by capitalism and high technology. While it isn’t very accurate, we have a tendency to think of the “Medieval” world as a barbaric, unclean, and uncivilized era, full of witch hunts, chastity belts, and the deliberate erasure of “ancient wisdom.” “Almost Medieval” turns that idea on its head, suggesting that perhaps our world is the one that’s truly barbaric. The image of its narrator, “falling through a rotting ladder,” can be taken as a rejection of the notion of a “ladder” of progress. Similar themes of open-ended symbolism, and the sorrow of modernity, can be found on “Empire State Human.”

Music: “Empire State Human”

Like “Almost Medieval,” “Empire State Human” is lively and faster-paced, with driving percussion. With its straightforward rhymes and repetitive structure, it readily encourages the listener to sing along, almost as if joining in some sort of ritual chant. It’s an idea that Marsh and Ware would return to in their Heaven 17 days, with tracks like “We Don’t Need This Fascist Groove Thang.” “Empire State Human” was the album’s only single, and thanks to this exposure, and its (relative) palatability compared to the rest of their catalogue, it remains one of the best known tracks from the early Human League. “Empire State Human” makes its concept pretty clear, with less ambiguous lyrics and an easy to follow mix that brings Oakey’s voice to the fore: the narrator wishes to become a building, and a mighty skyscraper no less, which might rival the achievements of the Pyramids of the ancient Egyptians. While it is clear that that’s what the song’s about, what we do with this once again high-concept subject matter is up to us. I like to think that this is some kind of perverse commentary on the unnatural and alienating experience of urban living, which may come with the feeling that the concrete and rebar structures that surround us are more significant to our lives than the people who may live or work in them. City life is addressed more directly by the track “Blind Youth.”

Music: “Blind Youth”

“Blind Youth” is probably the most “grounded” track on the album, in terms of its theme, making pointed remarks about “dehumanization” and “high-rise living.” It’s tempting to think of it as a sort of parallel to “Empire State Human,” with a broadly similar musical backdrop, and a more literal expression of the theme hinted at more obliquely by “Empire State Human.” With its focus on the experiences of the titular “youth,” “Blind Youth” can also be contrasted with “Almost Medieval,” whose narrator keens about feeling old. Where “Almost Medieval” deals with the disgust an older person feels at the decrepit state of the human race, “Blind Youth” shows the demented, unthinking joy of the youth, who have grown up in an industrialized and urbanized world, and don’t know different--or better.

While there have been many classic underground albums whose covers aimed to shock and displease polite society, the cover of Reproduction is one of the few that I feel would still be seen as offensive, over 40 years later. It was allegedly the product of a miscommunication between the group and the illustrator commissioned to create it; the band requested a scene in which people are dancing above a ward of babies in glass-topped incubators, and the striking angle, which seems to show people crushing infants underfoot, is an unintentional aspect of the design. Unintentional or not, this crudely violent aspect dominates the final composition, and lends it vileness and immediacy. Like the lyrics of many of the songs, the combination of the cover and title can be interpreted a number of ways. Perhaps it’s a glib commentary on human reproduction as fun and games: we partake in the “dance” of courtship and sexuality, and babies drop beneath our feet. Or perhaps it suggests a contrast between life’s enjoyments, like dancing, and its stressors, like the responsibilities of parenthood. It’s hard not to see so many crying, seemingly distressed infants without becoming upset oneself, and I think the deep instinctual revulsion that this piece inspires is part of why it’s remained so resonant in its subversiveness.

As I mentioned in my introduction, the Human League have gone down in history chiefly for the music they made later, which has largely buried this early period as part of their legacy--at least in the public eye and outside of the dedicated diggings of motivated enthusiasts. If you’re a fan of what you’ve heard from this album, you’ll probably enjoy their 1980 follow-up Travelogue, as well as their EP, Holiday ‘80. Given the emphasis on long-form albums among music aficionados, EPs and their exclusive tracks are quite frequently missed, but Holiday ‘80 is a gem from this short-lived line-up, featuring the fragile “Marianne” as well as a cover of the stadium favourite “Rock ‘N’ Roll,” made famous by Gary Glitter. Thumbing its nose at everything the culture of “rock and roll” stands for, and transposing this hymn to its greatness into an abrasive and sterile lunar landscape of synths, this is one of my favourite covers of all time, and seems to prefigure how a very different Human League would later become the archnemesis of all that rock fans held holy. It was also one of very few tracks to be performed on Top of the Pops, and subsequently see not a rise, but a drop in the singles charts!

Music: “Rock ‘N’ Roll”

My favourite track on Reproduction is one that appears on its second side, unlike the other tracks I’ve talked about so far: “Austerity / Girl One.” Side Two of Reproduction is mainly focused on longer and more narrative-driven tracks, and this is no exception. Like the opener of the second side, “Austerity / Girl One” is a medley, albeit one of two pieces that are original compositions and not covers, as medleys usually are. This track’s story is both timeless and modern, a bit like a contemporary King Lear: the “Austerity” half deals with an aging father, incapable of understanding his children, dying alone and ignored, while the “Girl One” half puts us in the mindset of his daughter, a New Woman whose life is hectic, but also bleak. It’s a story that many of us will relate to, about people who try their best with what they’ve got, but still feel as though they’ve failed in life. Its simple, but effective musical backdrop of wan synth pulses allows the narrative, and Oakey’s evocative portrayal of it, to take center stage. That’s everything for today, thanks for listening.

Music: “Austerity / Girl One”

#music #great albums #album review #album reviews #human league #the human league

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wei-gege-oldaccount · 4 years

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lwj and wwx only have 2 settings when looking at each other, they are either stupidly in love or stupidly horny. have you seen this post? kenny2234*tumblr*com/post/629515661032521728

Hi Anon!

Firstly, yes I have seen your post, and secondly you never asked for this and I am sorry for that.

I could write about their eye contact alone until the end of time, or at least until I succumb to the laws of entropy. I could just idly agree with you, yes, aha it’s love or lust and move on. But. I can’t. I can’t. I mean, this is a story where so much is told by the things that are not said. And there is a lot that can’t be said, either because it’s a character trait or because of censorship issues. I will try and keep this concise, and to do that I’m just focusing on mutual eye contact, and from LWJ’s perspective. Thinking to the BTS where Wang Yibo talks about how LWJ mostly only expresses himself through the eyes.

TL;DR: I disagree, there’s really more to it than that.

LWJ actively avoids eye contact with WWX until around episodes 6-7. He’s a Lan. He can NOT condone or make friends with this unruly, loud, arrogant, charismatic, irritatingly beautiful man. He has bad ideas about the uses of resentful energy. No matter how intelligent, observant and artistic he is. No matter now much of a prodigy and a skilled fighter he is. No matter how hot he is. No matter what his brother says.

He likes him but he doesn’t like that he likes him.

So LWJ actively avoids direct eye contact with WWX unless it’s a glare filled with the fire of a thousand suns. You know, as a warning.

This is until episode 6/7. By this point, they have fought water ghouls at Biling Lake. Drunkenly shared personal mom info. Used the Lan forehead ribbon inappropriately in the Cold Pond Cave, and had Physical Contact when escaping. WWX has called LWJ his Zhiji already. It’s only when WWX keeps his promise not to talk about the Yin Iron and scares NHS away when he tries to extract gossip that LWJ decides to reappraise him. Only then do we get some eye contact which isn’t laced with contempt or uneasiness (which of course JC is there to witness).

They go off and do the lantern ceremony. LWJ does a smile at WWX’s bunny art. That devastating look he gives WWX as he makes his vow. You can almost lipread LWJ’s brain thinking “marry me now”. LXC was right about him. Despite this, he tries to deal with the yin iron by himself because WWX is The Agent of Chaos after all. But, WWX is not going to let him bear this responsibility alone, because of course he wouldn’t.

Enter Battle Couple WangXian. They fight the fairy statue, multiple puppets, and the dire owl. Xue Yang happens. They meet famous duo SL & XXC and LWJ & JC totally fanboy over them, and it’s only then, some real Zhiji vibes hit LWJ, albeit with a bit of a sombre mood after WWX’s chat with XXC. My next fave moment of eye contact, I can literally feel LWJ’s stomach butterflies here after they watch SL and XXC leave together:

Whoa, is that us now? I mean, do I dare to even hope that that’s us?

LWJ decides to leave WWX in Qinghe under cover of darkness and asap. He has to get the yin iron back to Cloud Recesses with a low profile. So we don’t see them together again until the Wen Indoctrination Camp. They do a bunch of worrying and looking out for each other, and then we get the cave scene which has been giffed 4 million times already by others who have done a better job, but I haven’t so I slowed it right the fuck down. Forgive the bad colouring I’m trying not to take too much time over this. You’re right about this one anon.

Then lots of bad. I skipped these gifs because picture limit. In summary, LWJ is hurt and angry, lots of angy stares and sword pointing. How could WWX hurt himself by using these methods?! But then WWX promises he will never use demonic cultivation, and agrees to receiving help. LWJ can chill a bit. Night Hunt on Phoenix Mountain. I left this one out as it’s pretty self explanatory. “I used to think of you as my Zhiji”. “I still am”. Ugh but WWX knows he can’t unless he fully informs LWJ of his situation. It’s bittersweet. THE RAIN SCENE. This is not heart eyes or horniness anon it is pure PAIN.

Let’s skip to some good stuff. Yiling dinner date! LWJ can handle strict Lan sect punishments, hoards of puppets and fierce corpses but this situation? Not so much. He is so confused by this strange clingy child and the rabbling crowd and here comes his reason for being here in the first place knight in shining amour! (Ur right here anon, pure heart eyes).

Do I put a Nightless City gif here? Do I put the cliff scene here? It’s the most LWJ’s facial muscles move in the entire show and yet I can’t bring myself to gif it. It’s pure agony. Definitely not any longing romantic looks or horniness here.

So moving swiftly on, jumping to ep 2 for the epically long eye contact moment aka when WangXian are reunited. LWJ. does. not. take. his. eyes. off. WWX. until. he. hears. Zidian. crackle. OMG.

Anyway, after the Yin City arc and watching SL walking away with what remains of XXC’s spiritual cognition, LWJ is not holding back now. The amount of eye f***ing after this moment is frankly obscene. I’ll just leave some gifs of that.

I kind of ran out of steam but you get my point. I guess you can boil the other moments down to the fact they love each other? But I don’t know why anyone would want to simplify things like that. I know I’ve missed a bunch of stuff but this is long enough as it is! My opinion about this will probably change too as I’m still fairly new to the fandom. You just accidentally unlocked an Easter Egg with your comment, as it’s what I’m currently nerding out over haha. I’ll shut up now.

#忘羡 #魏无羡 #蓝忘机 #the untamed #chen qing ling #omg i lost this post in my 2500+ drafts when i saved it #i thought it had been lost in the tumblr abyss #as soon as i hit post i know i'll immediately change my mind about something #so sorry anon #*throws self in bin*#anon #ask #o #陈情令

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its-chelisey-stuff · 3 years

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My 2020 in Dramaland pt 4/4

Or what if could have been.... these are ALL (korean, chinese, taiwanese and japanese) dramas I dropped. I’m including even the ones I watched one ep of:

Korean dramas

When my love Blooms: JinYoung-ah! I failed you as a fan. I’m sorry. But no, for real, the drama might have been good but it was too melo for me at the time. The present time was too depressing, not what I needed at the start of the spring! And there was also not enough Jinyoung lol

The K2: I gave it a try when quarantine started. Made it to ep 8. This was actually the second time I’ve attempted to watch it. Maybe someday there will be a third and final one. I’m not sure...

Hyena: JuJiHoon is delicious, and I wanted to see him not killing zombies or all bloody. Good chemistry actually, but the law part bored me to sleep. Made it to ep 3. He looked hot af in a suit, btw.

When I was the prettiest: Only watched ONE ep to decide if I wanted to see it. I kinda liked it but decided to wait. I waited and saw the ending. A total NO. For real, Jisoo, I want to see you get the girl.

Flower of Evil: I can almost hear the collective gasp and the sounds of disgust from all the fans who loved it. Please read my explanation!!! I know how popular and well loved this drama was but... I just, well, wasn’t in the mood for it and didn’t fall madly in love like so many did. I tried. I really did. I follow a lot of people who watched it, so they kept me updated about it, it looked great, but it was not meant to be. Maybe, just maybe, someday I will comeback and give it a second try. Made it to ep 3. *Runs and Hides*

Dodosolsollalasolla or whatever. Ugh. I wanted to like it, so I gave it a chance, even though I wasn’t feeling it from the teasers. I’m sorry JaeWook. Choose better next time. They did him so dirty. Only watched one ep but I laughed about it here.

Chinese dramas

A little thing called first love The edits and fmvs are adorable! But I made the mistake of watching one that had their whole story and I said “Awww that’s so cute!” but the actual drama moved way too slow for me, I already knew what was going to happen and I struggled to connect with Kuanlin’s acting. He’s pretty to look at, but either your story falters or your male lead’s acting. You cannot have it both be bad. Ooops. So I lost motivation. Still, maybe I gave up too soon... Or not? lol I made it to ep 12 I think.

Hear to Heart: WOW the chemistry was on another level. I think I even heard some dating rumors about the leads. One of those stories where they used to date but some big misunderstandind happens, they break up and there’s a LOT of angst when they meet again but now he’s hot and rich. I honestly only watched it because of one clip it showed up on my recommended lol but FL got on my nerves because I didn’t know what she was thinking or feeling half the time speak, woman! and the dude couldn’t decide on whether to treat her nicely or badly, so he was hot and cold and it was exhausting. LOL He also had a girlfriend but that didn’t seem to be important when he was trying to make out with his assistant (i.e. the female lead.) Gave up on ep 10 but I read she had amnesia and didn’t know what had happened in the past which explains why she looked confused all the time. Male lead found out, they cleared the misunderstanding and happy ending!

My strange friend: What I saw made me laugh super hard and it looked kinda interesting. I guess there just wasn’t enough Yibo to keep me glued to the screen (btw the guy has great comedic timing, THE RANGE!). I heard the drama had some budget issues and they stopped production for a while and when they returned, Yibo was apparently busy filming The Untamed, so they had to do some CGI tricks to make it seem like he was there lol that doesn’t motivate me a lot to keep watching. Still... it’s Yibo. Has anyone seen it? Is it worth finishing it?

The ones I’m really willing to give a second chance to:

Romance of Tiger and Rose: Yeah, this one hurts. I’m gonna watch it, I promise. It’s just that the first ep, however crazy and funny, didn’t make me fall in love with the drama. I know spoilers lol and I want to try it again. I will watch it, it seems like my kind of thing lol

Dating in the Kitchen: Okay, big age gap between the leads my sister literally made a disgusted face when I showed her the trailer but if they have good chemistry, it doesn’t bother me, plus, I was liking the drama a lot. Another drama, however, intervened and became my obsession, but can’t remember which one. It was one that I did finish, for sure.

Sweet Dreams: Made it to ep 12 but OMG Deng Lun and Dilraba have the slowest slow burn. I mean, there’s 48 (49?)eps here! Why on earth do you need so much in a modern drama? It’s just business/company talk! A company that sells flowers btw I liked the dreams bit, and I LOVED watching Dilraba character shamelessly flirt with DengLun’s character in those sequences, but once they’re awake everything is not so great lol. Anyway, the dreams were gold and so was the chemistry, that’s why this is not completely dropped. I do want to see the whole thing.

General’s lady: Made it to ep 4 in one sitting but I paused on it and then I found Guardian and lol, I have priorities. But I liked the chemistry of the leads and it was cute. However, this might be more on the dropped than the maybe side of things...

Taiwanese dramas

Lost Romance: I mean, I saw some spoilers O_o you know which ones. It seemed hot but wow so many eps for a taiwanese drama, or is this the norm? And the eps were long too. Or maybe it weren’t that long and I was just bored lol. A real pity, because one of my fave dramas, overall, last year was the magnificent Before we get married. Damn, I want to rewatch it so bad. But this year, I didn’t watch any taiwanese dramas. I do need to work on watching more. Please tell me some good recs!

Japanese dramas

Koi wa Tsuzuku yo Doko made mo I actually kinda saw it with my sister. I mean, I was there when she was watching it, for the most part lol I know how it started, how the romance and the story developed (I know about the doctor’s ex) and how it all ended, I SAW the last ep. But I still feel like I fully didn’t watch it and I have no intention of doing so, so I put it on the dropped list.

Aaaaaaand that's it! I hope no one takes this as bashing, most of these dramas ended up here because of lack of time/motivation. I'm sure that these dramas were great for a lot of people and someone's favorites. I mean, I have shows on my list of finished dramas I wish I hadn't seen and dramas that made it to my list of favorites barely anyone saw or people hated. You never know with dramaland 🤭

Anyway, happy new year! I hope 2021 is a great, better year for everyone! Also, not a priority at all, but since we're in the topic of dramas, let's hope next year's are better and more exciting lol

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jaesqueso · 3 years

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What if Johnny debuted in EXO?

If you didn’t already know when Johnny joined SM Entertainment he trained with the EXO members and he was actually part of some initial line-ups but ultimately not debuting until years later with NCT instead. As EXO are one of my favourite groups and Johnny happens to be my NCT bias wrecker sometimes I wonder what would happen if he had actually debuted with EXO so if you’re interested in it to, do join me on this ride!

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Position, Unit, Symbols and first Teasers

For position I think he would have the same as he currently has in NCT: Lead dancer, sub-rapper and vocalist. These positions really fit him and I think he would specially be a good addition do the dance line. He would also be replacing Sehun as the maknae as he is the youngest of the EXO final debut line-up.

Since EXO initially debuted with the Korean and Chinese sub-units concept I think he would fit more with the members of EXO-K than EXO-M so I believe he would be placed there until eventually the units are blend.

From the existing powers I think the most fitting one for Johnny would be Fire (because let’s face it, he does light a fire within us, right? No? Just me? Ok). But if he was an addition to the line-up instead of a replacement they would give him a new power so I think it could be something like speed, that would be a good addition to the existing ones. As for his number, since most numbers are based on their birthdays or favourite numbers he could either be 09 or 02.

EXO was announced in December 2011 but only officially debuted in April 2012, in the meantime we were presented by several teasers introducing the members. I believe Johnny could have easily slayed the “Lightsaber” teaser (originally by Kai), be part of one of the teasers that feat several members or even having a brand new teaser with another demo that SM teased but never released (the fact that we never got a full version of Metal still doesn’t sit right with me…).

Mama (EP)

“What is love” was the first pre-released track sang by D.O and Baekhyun (Korean version), and being the vocal song it is Johnny wouldn’t be part of it much like the rest of the members.

“History” was the second pre-release single and all the members are included in the vocals and dance so he would too. Johnny would probably get Chanyeol ad-lib’s in the beginning of the first and second parts of the song, as for dance he would probably be centre at least in one of the chorus and mostly in the front line of the formations. Out of the 3 singles for this EP I think this is the one that would fit him best.

“Mama” was the last single promoted for this album. I don’t think Johnny would have a lot of lines here because most of the song they all sing together. Honestly I do believe this choreography could’ve looked better with 7 members instead of 6 as some parts look a bit strange, and I think Johnny could have quite a few centre parts instead of Kai (don’t get me wrong, I love Kai but we gotta admit SM was way to biased in the beginning).

As for the other songs: “Angel” is sang by the vocal line and “Two Moons” by the rap line, I think Johnny would fit “Two Moons” better. “Machine” would also be a song he would fit in well.

XOXO (Studio Album)

“Wolf” is the title track for this album and there are a lot of parts for Johnny to slay, from the beginning divided by the rap line to the last section of the second part before the chorus. I would love to see him being another branch on the EXO tree (I love this choreography so much) and since all the members come together on this song he could have a lot of time in the front line.

As for the other songs: I don’t think he would participate in “Baby Don’t Cry” like Kai and Sehun because I think it’s really well split between the other 4 members. The songs that would most fist him in my option are “Let Out the Beast” as it has some good parts that would fit his voice, “Heart Attack” (I might be a bit biased on this one as it’s my favourite track on this album) and “My Lady” as I think the all vibe of the song would be very interesting to see him in.

XOXO (Repackage)

“Growl” is a very fitting song for Johnny in my option, he would absolutely kill this choreography and the whole school concept would look so good on him.

As for the other songs: he would be freaking adorable singing “XOXO”.

Bonus note: I would love to see his acting skills in the little drama they did for this album. SM could’ve done so much more with it if that concept had been more developed.

Miracles in December (EP)

“Miracles in December” this track is only sang by the main vocal line so again I don’t think Johnny would be part of it, although he would look gorgeous in that music video (the acting scenes).

As for the other songs: the most fitting one in my option would be “The Star” as I think it has the best vibe for him. Also can you imagine him in the elf costume? A-D-O-R-A-B-L-E!

Overdose (EP)

“Overdose” would also be a good tittle track for Johnny from styling to the choreography. In this one the rap line barely has any lines but I think he could’ve blend in with the vocal line instead.

As for the other songs: he wouldn’t participate in “Moonlight” as it’s only sang by D.O and Baekhyun but I would love to hear him in “Thunder”.

EXODUS (Studio Album)

“Call Me Baby” has a very nice vibe for Johnny, again styling and choreography wise he would absolutely slay this and I feel like he could also get quite a few lines (but last face it, this would be the perfect song for EXO if they stuck with the original tittle “Call Me Daddy”).

As for the other songs: he would participate in “My Answer” as again is focused on the main vocal tine but I would love to hear his voice in “What if…”, “El Dorado” and obviously “Playboy”.

Love Me Right (Exodus Repackage)

“Love Me Right” has such a beautiful aesthetic we would get so many cool Johnny shots. And even thought the stylist screwed up making them wear American football uniforms with baseball hats (logic where are you?) I would love to see him with that. For this one I don’t think he would have many lines but there are a lot of parts in the choreography where he could easily be centre.

As for the other songs: “Tender Love” would suit him so well.

Sing for You (EP)

“Sing for You” is a slower track pretty much sang by D.O, Chen and Baekhyun so I wouldn’t see him having a lot of lines, but also it wouldn’t be the most suited concept for him.

As for the other songs: obviously I think he would fit “Lightsaber” as I previously mentioned he could’ve been in the initial teaser, but also “Girl x Friend” has some good lines for him.

Ex’Act (Studio Album)

“Monster” has a very cool choreography for Johnny to slay and there are a lot of good lines for him too. Visually we’ve seen dark Johnny a few times so he would fit right in.

“Lucky One” would have me go crazy with Johnny in those white suits. Also if his power was speed, like I mentioned in the beginning, it would be cool seeing him use it in the music video to trick those women who are keep EXO locked down.

As for the other songs: in terms of side tracks this would be a very good album for him as most songs would fit his vibe, except “Stronger” that is sang by the main vocal line and I don’t really feel like there would be space for someone else as the original distribution is really good.

Lotto (Ex’Act Repackage)

“Lotto” is my favourite EXO tittle track (I don’t even understand why some many people hate it) and I would love to see Johnny there. The whole concept just screams his name, even if they didn’t gave him a lot of lines he would still stand out here.

As for the other tracks: “Can’t Bring Me Down” would also be a great track for his voice and I think he could’ve also joined the line-up for “She’s Dreaming” even though it’s not sang by the whole group.

For Life (EP)

“For Life”, just like “Sing for You” would also be a track where Johnny wouldn’t have many lines.

As for the other tracks: like in their first EP we have two songs one for the vocal line “What I Want for Christmas” and one for the rap line “Twenty Four” and although I would love to hear him on the first one he would’ve definitely be in the second one instead because it’s so much his vibe.

The War (Studio Album)

“Ko Ko Bop” is the tropical vibe I crave to see Johnny in. Ever since I saw him in that floral shirt for the “Resonance” teaser pictures I knew he would’ve slayed this. Also it would be amazing to see him dance this choreography.

As for the other tracks: let’s just cut to the case and admit we just want to see him do the choreography for “The Eve”. Now that we got that out of the way I can also say that this would be a very good album for him in terms of side tracks as I could see him fit any of them.

The War: The Power of Music (Repackage)

“Power” is my least favourite EXO tittle track but honestly I could see Johnny in this music video with the other members fitting that weird spaceship with Doctor Octopus arms and they could’ve even used his speed power to defeat the villain. This would be a great opportunity to show case his bright and corky personality. It would also be amazing to have his ‘superhero’ cards and have him included in the comic that you get from the physical albums.

As for the other songs: “Sweet Lies” would be an amazing song for him.

Universe (EP)

“Universe” is another slow song so it would pretty much be like “Sing for You” and “For Life”.

As for the other songs: this album has my favourite side tracks so I’ll be biased and say he would sound amazing in all of them. Well, except for “Lights Out” which I think is the same situation as “Stronger”.

Don’t Mess Up My Tempo (Studio Album)

“Tempo” would make all our biker Johnny dreams come through. There are some pretty good line options for him and he could also have some killer parts in the choreography. Overall another great tittle track for him.

As for the other songs: this would be another great album for his vibe, specially “Sign” and “Oh La La La”. Also I would die hearing him sing “Smile On My Face”.

Love Shot (Don’t Mess Up My Tempo Repackage)

(There are no individual pictures for this shoot)

“Love Shot” is another tittle track with a great choreography for Johnny to slay, can you imagine him dancing that chorus? Anyway, when I saw the editorial NCT 127 did for Elle Japan I just knew his yellow suit would have looked so good next to EXO’s suits for this era.

As for the other songs: I would’ve loved to know how his voice would complement “Wait”.

Obsession (Studio Album)

“Obsession” has such an amazing duality concept, I would love to see Johnny against x-Johnny. Styling wise it would be something very interesting for him to try. In terms of line I think this would be the hardest one to fit him in as I think this is probably the best EXO distribution of their discography but anything is possible.

As for the other songs: the best ones for him in this album would definitely be “Trouble”, “Jekyll” and “Ya Ya Ya.”

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Wow, this took me so long to put together but it was worthy to walkthrough the EXO memory lane with Johnny. In my honest option I think it was the right decision to not debut him with them as I feel like he fits the whole NCT vibe way better but it’s always fun to wonder!

Do let me know your thoughts on this and also if this is something you’d like to see again maybe with other groups or members.

Thanks for reading ❤︎

#johnny #nct #nct 127 #exo #what if

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