#the discord messages are from our school. server.

[caus34concern]

based on true events

#be more chill #bmc #michael mell #rich goranski #jeremy heere #jake dillinger #w.roland!jere #guys i don't know what to do #i don't got 20 dollars #WE DON'T EVEN LIVE IN THE US!! #also he said it took him like 6mins to draw #which is crazy actually #boardwalk boys #i guess #is that what they're called #oh to make this even worse (better?) #the discord messages are from our school. server. #error 340

[caruliaa]

deciding if i want my text post about my father for today becuase too many would be whiny to be about how i get very terrifed anytime he raises his voice and thats prob not normal (which i already knew but yk) or a snarky "how come my dads on discord i though that site just pushed and agenda and tricked people into thinking theyre gay? that why i wasnt allowed it right?"

#see i was writing this post from the perspective that the first one was very concering and the second one is funny. #but yk i j realized to people that arent me theyre both concerning. ok. #my immediate response to seeing my dad on discord btw was to leave the official acnh server j bc thats like the most official server im in #and i got Scared. which is dub bc my dad doesnt play acnh why wld he use that server. but i Got Scared. #also ill tell u like the story of this first one which is that like. basically my sibling connected their phone to the internet at school #to reasearch smth and when they did they got a message from our mother abt watching a movie which was prob from sunday bc #apparently my mum was watching die hard then nd they joined for a bit idk but the fact that they got it now meant they kept being like #'thats weird do you guys think my phone is haunted i tihnk it might be' not entirely seriously #i also very like casually kept being like @na its probalby just a glitch those happen' #nd at some point i was very lightly like 'yk i dont think getting into the who thing of if ghosts exist is worth it when u cld just ask abt #the text message later' and rthe thing is fucking !!! my dad was literally agreeing with me !! but like he also seem somewhat actually like #upset and mad over my sibling saying their phone was haunted or at lest he was raising his voice and like seem mad to me #(i think he thought they were bieng fully serious abt the phone being haunted. nd that tht Not True bc it doesnt align w our religous #beliefs. but also idk if he brought up religon at all) #but the thing is my sibling was literally fine but like. auugh i got scared and freaked out #at some point i just put on my headphones nd tried to ignore it until he had moved on yay. #this happended in the car btw u guys need that context bc cars are eveil places for this reason parents are always Saying Shit there . augh #its so dumb like. this is why even when my parents r being fine i cant like. be around them. because they have caused me actual fr trauma #like intense trauma that impacts me every day bc i see them every fucking day. and i cant get away from it. so fun. #anyway. sorry this became a vent. SAD ! #flappy rambles #vent

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for telling a school counselor about what my friend does online?

I (F minor) am in middle school. I have a group of friends, about 8 people, but this is about one girl in specific we can call Annie. All of us are mutuals on tumblr, twitter, etc. and we have a discord server too.

All of us are into a lot of the same things, like art, anime, video games, and have a lot of the same hobbies. Most of us also struggle with mental health stuff like anxiety and/or depression so we regularly talk to our school counselor (F, Idk how old she is).

Anyways, we're all really close and we get along really well for the most part, but lately Annie has been doing stuff that really bothers and worries us.

She's VERY into internet discourse. Has 10 paragraph long DNI page, is constantly starting fights with other people, etc. She usually argues about stuff like LGBT+ rights, womens rights, etc. but also a LOT of fandom discourse which is my biggest concern.

A lot of my other friends reblog/retweet stuff like anime gifs, fanart, memes, etc. but pretty much every post I see from Annie is her fighting with someone over shipping or something like that.

A lot of the posts are basically:

Her talking about how disgusting a certain ship or character is

How everyone who likes that specific thing is a degenerate, or freak, or pedo or groomer.

How if you like problematic ships you need to get a therapist, or you deserve to be hurt. Once I saw her arguing with someone who said they write certain stuff due to trauma and she said "You don't have trauma, you're either lying or you actually liked it and that's why you write such disgusting nasty shit"

Fighting with random people and accusing them of being a predator or a pedo

Breaking her own DNI (which says adults, proshitters, etc. DNI) and then getting mad at the other person for responding

It's really upsetting to see because she does this CONSTANTLY. She never seems to use tumblr/twitter to do things she actually likes. I never see her reblog gifs or memes or just silly lighthearted posts about stuff she enjoys.

It's especially upsetting because we're minors and she TELLS PEOPLE THAT. Like she's arguging with people that she thinks are pedos or child predators, while openly telling people her actual age. To me that's like covering yourself in bloody steaks and then jumping into water full of sharks.

I was really starting to get concerned because even in our private discord server she's always talking about how much she hates these people or whatever and how they should die, a lot of the time she says things like "they should get the wall" or "I hope their nasty fanfics happen to them irl that would teach them lol" and it really freaks me out.

She also talks about seeing the "child porn" that these people make which as far as I'm aware is drawings of characters but it still freaks me out how open and calm she is about looking at what she THINKS is child porn. I asked her if it's child porn why is it being linked in callout posts for other people (including minors!) to see and not being reported to the FBI but she just gets mad and changes the subject.

Me and our other friends have mentioned before that we don't like hearing about this kind of stuff but then she just gets mad and goes offline or gives us the silent treatment at school.

A month or so ago I got so fed up and upset, that I took a bunch of screenshots of her tumblr account and discord messages. One thing to note is that her username is VERY specific.

It's a combination of her first and last name and her birth year. Most people will not know that, but if you know her name and birthday, it's easy to tell it's her. She also goes by her real name online which I also screenshotted as proof it's her.

I brought all this to the school counselor, and I told her how worried I was about Annie, and how I think she's doing something really unsafe. Not only is she confronting people she thinks are child predators/groomers, she's telling people they deserve to get hurt in really awful ways, and looking at porn and I don't think this is good for her mental health.

The counselor at first was like "Idk are you SURE it's her? It could be anyone online!" But I insisted that it was and explained the username thing and that this was our private discord server so obviously I know it's her.

She thanked me for letting her know and told me I was being a good friend and then we talked about how I was doing, and then I left. I kind of forgot about it until a week later.

Annie wasn't online at all and I was kind of worried, but then I saw her on Monday at school. I was with our other friends and we called out her name so she would see us and come over and she LOST IT. She started screaming at us and telling us how awful we were, and how we ruined her life.

Idk what exactly happened, but apparently the counselor talked to her and her parents got involved? Her parents now monitor her internet usage, they have child safety stuff on the browsers, and she's only allowed on certain websites for doing research for school, or watching videos on youtube on their account so they can see what videos she's watching, or playing games on steam.

She said that her parents are also putting her in therapy once a week now (with an actual therapist, not the counselor) and she's only allowed to go out with an adult chaperone (either her older sister or one of her parents).

But... None of our friends know it was me who told the counselor. Annie has other friends besides us, so they're also "suspects" for being the snitch. It seems like half of our friends are relieved that Annie is kept away from that kind of stuff and the other half are mad at whoever the snitch is for ratting Annie out and resulting in her having less privacy/freedom.

At first I was happy that Annie was getting help and being kept away from this but now I feel really conflicted. I feel so disgusting talking to her and our other friends and pretending nothing happened, knowing that I was the one who told the counselor.

Annie still talks to us but she's a lot less open. We still have our discord server but apparently her parents will read through the messages to make sure she's not talking about anything bad and that she's only talking to us and not strangers.

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole #ship discourse

[ask-caine]

ok ok what’s yours and moons love story. Beginning to end

OOC POST

It's a bit of a crazy story, actually!

We originally met online through TADC, when she messaged all the Caine accounts she could find for a shitpost "wedding" thing. We ended up hitting it off and talking about random things for a while. It started with my random fact about Kentucky marriage laws and how a couple used them to get married by cocaine bear (hence the below picture)

We ended up learning about a shared interest in plague doctors, as well as discussing several very random topics. Anyways, she invited all the Caines to a discord server, and I ended up being the only one who actually showed up. We would end up talking for hours upon hours day after day there. It was genuinely shocking how much we had in common.

At this point, I had been kinda been picking up on some of the flirtatious undertones behind some of the things she was saying, but I wasn't 100% sure about it yet and was still kinda testing the waters. I'd heard the term love at first sight, and looking back on it, that's pretty much what it felt like. I had been developing a crush on her up to this point, and I kept thinking about her as I was getting ready for bed. I had to keep stopping myself from falling head over heels, reminding myself we barely even knew each other and telling myself "no, she's just being nice. Don't be weird, there's nothing behind this, she's just being friendly."

...As it turned out, she wanted to be a little more than friends... Given my feelings up to this point, I was a little overwhelmed when she told me. I had to take a minute to collect my thoughts, to process everything (hence her jokes about me pulling a Caine and running away). But I liked her, too, and was willing to try a long-distance relationship. So, that's what we did.

It was only a few days after we first got together officially that I told her I loved her. It just felt right. Apparently I caught both of us off-guard with it, since she was sure that she'd be the one who would've said it first. ...We both dived in a little too headfirst from there. From my side of things, it was just so exciting and exhilerating to have this feeling I'd been searching for all my life, and I wanted more of it. We took a step back and both agreed to try and take things at a more reasonable pace from here on out.

We ended up learning a lot about each other. It was like we were the same person, split apart and put in two entirely different situations but turning out the same way anyway. ...This similarity became concerning when we realized we both had the same last name, as well as the fact that we both had Scottish ancestry. But, one family search check later, we confirmed that we are not, in fact, related. Just another insane coincidence that further proves that we were made for each other...

We shared a lot with each other. Our interests, hobbies, ideals, feelings on various topics. Our experiences throughout life, good and bad. The darkest parts of us. Every day, we grew closer. There was no denying that there was something special between us.

That isn't to say everything was perfect. We both still had a lot to learn about ourselves and about each other. There were ups and downs. Things were far from easy. There was a lot of avoidable pain both ways. As time went on, we started to become a little more distant...

Eventually, the stress of life and school and worries and everything going on got to be too much, and she called for us to take a break from the relationship. This hurt, of course... But, taking a break and being done are very different things. I was okay with taking a break, since we would still hang out and such sometimes, just not as romantically.

But, that still wasn't enough. Everything continued to be really stressful, and she felt like she wasn't a net positive in my life and was dragging me down (though the truth was exactly the opposite). So, she decided to fully end the relationship. Which... Really hurt me. Badly.

I kind of fell into a depressive state for a while. I had opened myself up like never before, let myself be more vulnerable than at any point in my life. I had finally found love, the one thing I'd truly wanted all my life, the only thing I've ever needed, and then it was just taken right away. The one thing I feared more than anything else in the world had come to pass.

We would still talk occasionally, but not like before. I already hurt so much, and just talking with her without being able to say the love I still felt was torture for me. So, I distanced myself a bit. I dealt with things on my own. I learned a lot about myself as I came to terms with how things had ended up.

Eventually, I started to feel a little more okay. I knew I could never stop loving her, so I decided to try and turn that love from romantic to platonic and still try to be a friend. Because while I may have lost her, she didn't want me out of her life completely. I could make do as just friends.

But, when I started to come back and we started to talk more again, she realized how much she had been missing me while we were apart. She figured out that some of the things she'd been feeling had been more than she'd realized. She learned that she actually was happier when we were together, and that she still really enjoyed being with me.

So, she began to give little hints again, like before. And, again, I picked up on them, but I didn't want to believe them 100% because of how much I'd been hurt last time. I told myself that she was just showing platonic love, the same way I was. Things would never be the same again. They couldn't be. If I was good for her before, she wouldn't have left...

It was actually Randy who got us actually talking again, first on our blogs, and then regarding what we were being sent. This eventually led to us talking just in general, about all sorts of things... Including what had happened between us. It was emotional, but we both came out of it feeling better about things.

That said, it took until this post before I realized she still loved me and that it was okay to love her back, the way I'd been holding in all this time. We had a heartfelt reunion, though we weren't officially dating again just yet. It still took me a while after that to fully accept everything and let down my guard again, after how much I was still hurting from last time...

But I didn't like the feeling of keeping her away. Of having a barrier between us. I desperately craved that deep, personal connection of love with her again. So, I opened my heart up again. And I'm so incredibly grateful that I did.

Soon after that point, Randy showed up and all those shenanigans ensued. But they only managed to get us talking more about things and uniting against it, which actually brought us even closer together. So, I guess if one good thing's come out of that dumpster fire of stress and stupidity, it's that.

Things have been absolutely wonderful since we got back together. We both learned a lot about ourselves in our time apart, and things have been much better between us. The rocky, uncertain road from before the break had smoothed over. And we fell so much deeper in love the second time.

Add in the stress of the past several weeks, with all the Tumblr drama with these blogs and the hiatus and everything (which I'm not getting into because you can see all that for yourself by looking through our blogs), and you're caught up to the present day. Life is still very stressful for us both, but a lot less so than when we first got together. We understand ourselves and each other so much better, which helps us make less mistakes and treat each other more tenderly and personally in the ways that we need most.

As for the future, immediately after finishing school, I plan to find work and save up to visit her in Canada sometime in the summer. After that is a little hazy at the moment, but we'll figure out our lives and put together a plan to find stable jobs and create a good life for ourselves up there.

And that's it, that's our story. From when we met all the way to the present day. You said beginning to end, but I'm afraid there is no end to our love. The story's still being written. Our lives are still being lived. I hope to be able to add to this years into the future, when we're living together and when we start our own family. But it might still take a while to reach that point.

#pdw x shy #ooc post #love story #lore dump #tadc ask blog #tadc bluetooth #bluetooth tadc #caine tadc #tadc caine #moon x caine #caine x moon #caine x the moon #the moon x caine #idk how to tag this #i hope this is good

[ms-demeanor]

hello! sorry to bother w this but im sort of desperate at this point. given your post about school abuse: so like. i had a similar experience and i thought that i had sorted my brain out. BUT. big but. now im trans and every time i have to correct people w/ misgender or come out to people that i dont already know their opinion on the issue, i get an anxiety attack that makes me unable to do it. ive told many therapists and no one so far has understood why im terrified of making stuff that other people can perceive as me being difficult to work with. would you have *any* advice? thanks!

Okay so first of all it is totally valid to feel that way; that isn't an irrational response, that is your body and brain going "!!!! I have learned this lesson before!" But just because it's a sensible response doesn't mean it's functional in the long term, which is why it needs to be addressed (which I'm sure you already know, I'm just explaining for people in the back).

So now here is some meandering advice:

Spend time with people you already know you can trust. It's okay to take a break from new people and situations (as much as is possible) when you are processing traumatic events and learning to care for yourself. Spending time with people who you don't have to come out to, who don't misgender you, can help you normalize being out and correctly gendered to yourself.

Recognize that you don't have to be out to everyone and some assholes aren't worth it. This is going to depend some on the context, but you don't owe everybody an explanation for yourself and if people repeatedly misgender you after being corrected you may just be better off not spending time around those people.

Loop in trusted people in low-stakes ways. If you get the sense that someone who you think is pretty safe has misgendered you on accident, it might still feel too intimidating to correct them in person but it might be a good idea to follow up with text or a call or a message to say "hey, just FYI, I think I heard you use a/b pronouns for me earlier, I just wanted to let you know that I use c/d pronouns. Did you want to meet up again next week?" the breakdown on why I think this is effective is - Distance means you're safe - nonthreatening "FYI" means you aren't saying "I'm offended" and assumes good faith from the other person - feels less accusatory (not that you need to tone police yourself, but if you're trying to lower the stress level overall then assuming it was a mistake and letting them know you don't think it was on purpose should reduce the overall tension) - request to meet up again or topic switch to something lighter once again says "I'm not mad, that was just regular information, we can now return to our scheduled programming"

I think that, generally speaking, this is also a decent way to come out to people if you're nervous; physically remote and emotionally casual can be a good place to work from (even if you're actually panicking in your head but you can pull off casual in a written message)

Find (or create) a space where people are 100% going to support you. If you need to create a discord server, if you need to schedule a regular coffee date with trusted friends or family members, whatever it is, give yourself a space where you are unconditionally supported and can have people to bounce ideas and concerns off of. Even if it's just you and one other person, it's good to know you have *someone* who you can say "I think I want to tell this other person to use my pronouns but it's scary" to and know that you're not at risk in any way. I'd say try to make sure that you're still interacting with people outside of that space, but have a space to retreat to where you can just drop the worry.

Recognize that somebody else's problem is not a reflection of you. If you have, for instance, a coworker who is being a piece of shit and refusing to recognize your gender, that is not a reflection of your gender that is a reflection of them being a piece of shit. If there is a classmate or a sibling who uses the wrong pronouns after being corrected that doesn't mean you're not entitled to your pronouns that means they are being a piece of shit. Some people are just not going to accept you and that's on them. Try to minimize your time spent with them and if you have to spend time with them at work take steps to ensure your safety, but don't fight losing battles with assholes.

It really is legitimately scary. You have good reasons to be scared and you are doing a very frightening thing (and not to do the meme thing but you are legitimately being so brave about it; the fact that you are reaching out and asking anyone for help, including randos on the internet, means that you are taking steps to doing the scary thing and that is SO GOOD and I'm really proud of you for making the effort in spite of the fear).

Here is some less meandering advice:

Practice. Talk to yourself in the mirror, practice with friends, practice with your therapist. Practice coming out to yourself in a casual way. Practice correcting your pronouns. Practice an introduction for yourself that explains the information you want to give to new people you might meet. Get it down to a quick little patter, get it to be something that's easy to say to yourself in the mirror first, then try it with friends for practice, then try it around the safer people you might want to give the information to. It'll get easier as you go.

Look for a local support group (or an online support group). If there's a local LGBTQ+ center you should see if they've got events going on or a support group you can join or workshops or any manner of social thing where you can go interact with people who have been through similar stuff.

Journal. Each time you find yourself frightened of talking to someone about your gender, do what you need to to get through the day and then sit down and think about that interaction. Write down what happened, write down what you were thinking. Was there something in particular that made you anxious? Is it something you can practice addressing? Was there something you noticed about the person that made you uncomfortable? Is that a common thread in the times you have trouble talking about this? If you're able to narrow down specifically what is making it hard to speak to some people that might make it easier to explain to therapists but will also make it more actionable for you.

Here's some very optimistic advice:

If at all possible find a friend who will be rabid and unflinching in their support for you and hang out with them around new people. Get yourself an attack dog copilot who will cheerfully step up and make corrections for you. I know not everyone can do this and I know that if you can find someone like this they can't be around all the time, but it can be wonderfully reassuring to find that one person who you know is going to be ride or die about making sure that everyone in the room respects you. (Being that person for someone else can also teach you how to be that person for you)

[cho-aaacho]

(Hc's) Gamer Boyfriend! Gojo Satoru

Masterlist

Tags : Teen Gojo, Gamer Gojo, Classmate Gojo, Soft Gojo, Secret Crush, Best Friends to Lovers, Idiots in Love, Reader is Genderless.

The first time you met Gojo Satoru, you thought he was a typical basketball captain with a sunny aura emanating from him. He rarely talks to any other classmate; come on, he's so popular.

At that time, it was a nice summer in Tokyo. You and Shoko were cleaning the class, and he suddenly approached you, patted your shoulder, squeezed them a bit, and asked, "What is your Game ID?"

"Excuse me? I don't play such games, Gojo-kun."

"I'll teach you."

Such a weird boy, to be honest.

He brings two PSPs to school so you can play with him during lunch break.

"You know it's illegal to bring a console to school, Gojo-kun."

"Well, I have permission from Yaga-sensei. He gifted me that PSP as my birthday present. Hey, watch out; you'll lose."

He memorized all the gaming YouTubers' names along with their most-watched videos.

He wears a headband while playing games.

He is the leader of a gaming community's gang. It wasn't a bad gang; it was just a group of gamers who loved to share their interests.

He can spend 13 hours playing games on weekends, and he'll come out of his room only when his dad yells at him or when you visit his home.

Sleeping in class has become a habit for him. When he does that, he'll snuggle on your lap to hide his face from Yaga-sensei.

But Yaga-sensei always caught him.

His favorite song is Resident Evil—The Save Room, and he'll play that song while cleaning the classroom.

He always messages you when he's ready to play games. It almost makes you dizzy because he always spams you when you don't reply to him.

Despite how bad you are at the game, he'll teach you patience, talking in soft tones while guiding you step by step.

He rarely opens the mic, but when he does, he'll mock the other players and say how bad they are at the game. He's so aggressive, but you find it cute because he always tries his best not to include you.

"You're my best friend. I would never hurt you. Our team is just stupid; let's play another game, shall we?"

He loves Manga Cafes so much. He always invited you to join him and read all his recommendations.

"This manga is so good, but the MC is so lame and stupid."

Gladly to holding your hands in Akiba and making sure you don't fall or bump into someone else. His palm is so warm and big.

His mom loves you, and whenever he invites you to his mom, Mrs. Gojo will give you a nice and delicious cake along with expensive tea.

"Where's Satoru?" — Geto Suguru.

"He's in the manga cafes, I guess." — Ieiri Shoko.

Absent from school has been your weekly activity with him. But he doesn't want Yaga-sensei to catch you two. So you'll spend your time at his home, eating cake or ice cream, playing games, and taking a nap.

Of course, he didn't do anything else besides playing games or napping. He's a gentleman, after all. A good boy.

You can find him on Reddit.

He uses a combination of your name and his as a password for his computer, he even changes his Game ID to that.

He never cheats at games.

He is an admin of a Discord server and is talking about an underrated game.

"Hey, I know you and Satoru are close like a flower and water. But make sure to not miss my class, okay?" —Yaga-sensei

He hates Gacha games so much. He thought it wasn't a game at all. "My gacha luck is so bad this month. Oh, damn."

He has two different Twitter accounts. One with a cute avatar and only follows you. The other one he uses to share his gaming progress.

Gojo may be in love with you. Because every time you interact with someone else on the Discord server, he'll kick them; remember, he's an admin.

He loves to lean his head against your chest while playing games, and when he falls asleep, you let him be. He’s so dramatic but cute at the same time.

"Hey, I know it sounds crazy and lame, but hear me out. I don't know what will happen to us when we graduate. But I want to be your gaming buddy until we are old. Even if I have dementia, I will find another way to remember you."

"I want to spend my life with you, not only to play games but also to do everything with you. Because I love you."

#gojo x you #gojo x reader #gojo satoru x you #satoru gojo x reader #gojo headcanons #jjk gojo x reader

[amberluvsbugs]

My reaction to the news you just posted:

I saw your 'I lost someone' post a few days ago, and I have no clue what was going through that person's head for them to do that. Neither you, your co-workers, nor anyone in the fandom who may be suffering from illness deserved to be deceived like that.

My heart goes out to you, and I hope you're doing okay now. 💖

(If you're comfortable clarifying this for anyone who didn't see that post and may want to know the full context (no stress if you don't want to ofc), was Ari initially claiming to be dying of cancer or was it something else? Either way, it's still disgusting what they did.)

thank you it really means a lot. ;;;; In case anyone didnt see the post I made a while back, this is the full story for clarification: This all started on April 29th when I received a DM from my co-worker Toby, saying that a Poppy Playtime fan and friend we will call Ari, who he told me was 18 and has come to know for a solid year, was set to be sedated on May 6th due to having an incurable cancer. Because of this, he wanted me to create an illustration for her before she passed which I immediately took up the offer. Now, for clarification, I don't trust what anyone says in the PPT community. I am aware of how immature and dangerous the community can be. But when it's coming from someone I know and trust, I put my trust forward on that person. I don't mess around when it comes to someone nearing their death. So I got in contact with her, made sure she saw the illustration I made for her, and for the past week after work hours, I would talk with her in VCs and chill at every chance I got to make sure she was happy and having a good time. She acted very kind and sweet to me and so many others who would join the VC as they also soon came to know of her upcoming passing as well. On Saturday, May 4th we hosted a podcast for her as a subtle final farewell to the whole server. And on Sunday evening at 5 pm, me and Toby talked with her one last time in a private vc until she had to take her final leave from Discord. At 6 pm, me and Toby stayed on call listening to the Caretaker album fully (as we both had a big fascination for The Caretaker album, Everywhere At The End Of Time) as a sort of timer to let us know when she had passed, as we knew in 6 hours she would be sedated. At 1 am on Monday morning, The album finished. We both cried so hard it gave us headaches. I only got to really know her for a short time, but at that moment, she made such an impact on me and so many others in the PPT server and community. We had made art dedicated to her and I had even laid out a post for her. Everyone was mourning over Ari’s departure and for 4 days me and Toby were a MESS of emotions of grief. That was until I received a message from Toby on Thursday, May 9th, saying he needed to speak to me urgently in call. Toby told me that he had been watching Ari's activity and found something off with it as it had recently gone active a few times. I told him that maybe it was her friend having access to her account in her passing but Toby immediately showed me proof of the activity that's been going on in another server and on her Roblox account that she had. And that's when we needed proof or confirmation. For the past 4 hours, we did our research to find leads on her. We eventually found her school which apparently confirmed that she was 14, NOT 18, and we got in contact with her parents and asked them about Ari to which they were confused about this whole thing and told us that she was here. Which CONFIRMED that she was still ALIVE. We filled in on the parents for what Ari did and she is no longer going to have access to her electronics. We were both devastated at this point and absolutely furious. Everything we did for her, and the community, was all for nothing. She used and fooled us by a means to get attention and to specifically get in contact with Toby and be forward with him as a minor. We dedicated hours and days to her, mourned and cried for her, all for it to be crumbled down into a fake death. We were beyond disappointed, me especially as I don't take kindly to this sort of thing. I don't get mad. In fact, I try to be a kind person to everyone, but the fact someone would take advantage and play death like this to us for attention is disgusting and just wrong. I have moved on from this but please don't make this a big deal. They were 14 and this will not stop me from doing what I love for the PPT community or whatnot. It's just a life lesson I will take to heart and be careful to not put my full trust in someone unless I have clarification that they are indeed going through a death-like situation like this.

#Ask ALB #sorry its a lot but i think you guys need a solid clarification for this whole situation #Please for the love of god dont be like this person #dont play with death for attention...

[duckies27]

I'm not one to normally interact with drama, but at this point, I have waited way too long to just sit here in silence. There is a creator on this platform named Hamlet Unfortunately, also known as Kenny, and I can’t just stay sitting on this.

I despise this man for multiple reasons, and I'll get into all of them here. In my opinion, it's not fair that he continues to do this sort of thing and just gets away with it, getting love and attention while doing so. All while other people similar to me get 5 to 10 likes on some of our work. I don't want to spend this entire time just completely thrashing him. However, there’s too much evidence to just ignore.

My friend Dork (@zestfeast ) and I are on a server with another Discord friend (who I won't name for their own sake, I don't want to drag them into this whole thing). I met the two of them on the fan-made Stinky Dragon discord, and we bonded pretty quickly over our love of the characters and our love of the cast. The show was something we bonded over and we wanted to spend as much time together by talking about it, without other people getting in the way. So the third party made a server and invited the two of us. We had a great time for the first two and a half weeks. It was a safe space with all the people that I trusted. We are all afab and personally, that makes me more comfortable as someone who is a cis woman. We talked about all sorts of things mainly relating to our enjoyment of the characters, coming up with AUs, and coming up with stories, all of which were pretty fun. At the time of the start of the server, I was personally barely baby 18, while the other two were and are still minors. This may not seem like a problem, but the problem came when. Kenny or Hamlet Unfortunately, as you know him, joined the server.

He was a friend with the third party and both me and Dork were completely comfortable with him joining. It wasn't our place to choose considering it is the third party's actual server. We sat and talked for a little bit, but after joining he didn't say anything. I didn't think anything of it, I'm also pretty shy but he was just awkward. Once again, I didn't think anything of it but then we started talking more. He started talking more. I wasn't a part of this conversation simply because I was at work at the times he was more vocal. I'm super busy, I work from 3:00 to 7:00 every single day right after school and it's too much hands-on work for me to come and check Discord all the time. A lot of the big conversations would happen when I wasn't there, and while I was currently doing things that took my full attention. I am a custodian worker at a middle school, I'm constantly working around kids, I'm constantly working around other people and it makes it hard to be on my phone. I missed the majority of these conversations, but to make sure that this was fully correct, I made sure to read back to all of the things that he said. It's not fair to judge a book by its cover without fully reading the contents. I read over 600 messages all sent over the course of a few weeks and I'll be dead honest, they were pretty terrifying to read back. Especially someone who has been around victims of the jokes he was mentioning. These included sexual content, drug jokes, and stuff that no person should ever joke about, especially not with minors.

It started simple enough. We just were talking about art relating to the characters and I'll be honest, some things weren't exactly always super family-friendly. We try to keep it light and airy the majority of the time within the server, but we had a few dedicated chats for the not-so-family-friendly stuff that includes some maybe more suggestive fan art. Most of the time it was and is pretty clean. We tried our best to censor what wasn't, especially because we had two minors on the server and people could always glance over our shoulders. I was in, particular, very aware of this and made sure that I didn't post anything without censoring first. One of the first things Kenny said to one of our minors on the server was "I'll suck your dick", when talking about fan art that Dork had done. Dork is very young compared to me or possibly him. I don't know how old he is but I just know that this comment made me uncomfortable reading back on it, especially because Dork is like a brother to me. I would protect him with my life if I could. I love this kid and would unironically do anything for him. They continued talking and he was incredibly mean to Dork, often calling him stupid and often acting as if his actions were childish and not as important as Kenny’s actions. When Dork tried to bring up another subject, relating to theater, not only did Kenny call him a fool, but he also said “I don't want to suck your dick anymore" continuing the uncomfortable, NSFW environment that he was starting to form.

As many of you who've read my page know, I like writing angst but I also enjoy writing stuff that's not so family friendly. I like pushing my boundaries and learning how to write, as an adult now, because it's a way of expressing myself that people don't need to see. It was a personal server thing that I kept it censored to protect people who didn't want to see it at that time. At one point I put out a request question saying I would write anything anyone wanted smut, angst, or fluff. I like writing requests and I like writing gifts for friends. It's a personal love language of mine. Kenny stumbled around for a bit, trying to come up with an idea before eventually asking me for Sliqueborg smut. I don't like the ship. It's not my thing, I'm more into BrinkBorg or the canon Lynn Mer and Kyborg. So I asked, “what are your headcanons?” I might as well be proper when I write this story. I don't want to come up with some idea that he didn’t agree with. He went to the headcanon channel and gave me one of the most inappropriate and jarring strings of sentences I have ever heard. Not only did he make our beloved wood elf incredibly abusive, but he also took Slique’s character and destroyed it. It was horrible to listen to and even more horrible to read back. I am 18, a barely illegal adult and the other two are minors on this server. I was terrified to see that he willingly put this down on paper for anyone to see. He only censored the thing because I had personally asked him earlier on.

I already was feeling uncomfortable with this guy. He was being pushy and mean and a lot of his headcanons were hard to swallow, and more and more times he brought up sexual things. I have a personal headcanon for the Groethe crew that relates to the musical instruments they would play. Ella plays violin, Mathilde sings, Barney plays flute, and Chip plays French horn. I thought it was a cute thing because of how Ella and Chip would very well complement each other, but Kenny took the opportunity to make a very inappropriate joke. That made me very uncomfortable because it was about Chip, who I see as a close similarity to my father. Chip acts and says things like my father would, so hearing this very sexual joke automatically took me out of the conversation. I hated it. I hated the idea of it. Not only that but there was one point in time when Dork was opening up about something very personal (which I won't share here) However, I came in at the worst possible time because I was on break. It happened to be insanely out of context, so of course I was like “What the hell?” But I didn't say it in a mean way. I meant it in a kind, confused way, similar to how an older sibling would walk into a conversation that you're having, that happens to be weird. Kenny continued to then look down at Dork, calling them dear and darling as if they didn't understand what I was saying. I came in and I was like “Wow this is kind of weird”, but that was it. I didn't push or prod. I didn't judge them beyond just that it was a weird message to get out of context and went back to work. Kenny belittled Dork for another 20 minutes after I went back to work.

Dork came to me the next day or so, in tears. They were terrified. They felt horrible. Kenny was being such an asshole to him and he couldn't do anything about it. It's a third party’s server and Kenny was a friend to the third party member. We didn't feel comfortable talking right to her right away. So instead the two of us hopped on a 2-hour long call on Discord to talk about our grievances. I helped Dork write a message to Kenny but instead of apologizing in response, he just said that it was his humor, a mask to protect himself. As someone who uses a mask constantly to protect myself from trauma, this pissed me off. His mask was being a jerk, his mask was being mean, and most importantly his mask was being overly sexual when it wasn't required.

Another thing that he often did was make fun of drug culture. Make fun of the “druggies”, including snorting pain pills and other issues that should not be joked about, while talking about his headcanons relating to Slique and Kyborg. He also mentioned rape, which I am completely uncomfortable with as a cis woman who has dealt with uncomfortable situations that deal with my body. I hated this. He came in as a cis male (based on what he said himself) completely invading a comfortable and safe space. Kenny is not the type of person I would leave my drink with at a party. I felt uncomfortable talking to him the majority of the time but I didn't want to bring it up because I didn't want to hurt the third party's feelings. After Dork came to me in tears, I said enough is enough and I reached out to her anyway. Thankfully the third party was kind, kicked him out of the server and I haven't had to interact with him since.

However, I've seen issues within the Tumblr fandom, the fandom that's taken me so warmly and held me to a higher standard than I've held myself for years. I love to see the community interacting with my posts and I love seeing my moots talk to me in such a kind and happy way. However, I know there are multiple people within the community, one who I talked to and wishes not to be named, has had issues with him. Most people see SliqueBorg as a very abusive and toxic ship due to his headcanons. He's ruined a ship, that though I don't agree with, is valid. Not only that, but he also still ships Mudd with multiple characters including Gum Gum (This is just vague posting and suggestive tagging, but it's very easy to see him doing something like this). which is a huge issue on its own. He doesn't care about if someone is a minor and if they would even want to be in a relationship.

During the whole “Mudd Gate '', which is what I'm calling the one actual problem we've ever had within this community, when actual Aro ace people were coming out and talking about how they didn't like how Mudd was being shipped with characters. A lot of people agreed, including me, but Kenny came onto the server and started complaining along with the third party (who will again, stay unnamed). Both of them came with swinging swords, dragging down the entire Tumblr community saying it was unfair for them to completely block out a ship component just because of a canon sexuality given by Jon himself. It took me a little bit to feel comfortable within it as someone who's Demi who was personally was seeing Mudd as Demi. But now I see the issues of my ways. How little aro ace representation there really is in the world, that is untouched by fandoms. Just look at Alstor from Hazbin Hotel. He's constantly shipped with people despite being a canon Aro ace character.

Through this all, I just want to say that we should stop supporting him. We should stop giving him a platform. Not only is he a fake fan just with how he characterizes Kyborg but he also has issues with sensitive topics that he will continue to joke about until the very day that he dies. I can tell that he thinks a lot of people are sensitive. Just saying things are offensive for clout or some other reasons, but a lot of the things that he actually says are very offensive and very inappropriate around the people he's been around. His actions almost took Dork away from this fandom. It isn't as bad as some other things that have come up in the past relating to other communities (*cough cough* Wilbur *cough cough*) If you hate me for making this post then I'll just say I don't care. I am planning on blocking him after I finish this post or at least until after he can react. I don't want to just completely block him from seeing his criticism but I will stop supporting any posts I have seen. I will make sure that he is no longer on my dash because he has done things that I am severely uncomfortable with. He does not bring good vibes to this community and he especially should not be allowed to continue being in the fandom if he's going to spread such hate. This is a kind and loving fandom that has taken me and others with open arms in times of struggle and times of pain. He has made it uncomfortable to be in. I cannot support him and I implore the rest of you to do the same after his actions.

#tftsd fandom #problematic creators #tales from the stinky dragon #this is all true #i have proof

[cringepunk77]

Hey Chooms,

I want to address the situation surrounding my Nexusmods ban, and Rockergirlfriend/Zwei. I want to put rumors to rest and just be open and explain my side of things. I sincerely regret the way this incident played out and I take ownership of my mistakes. That said, there is some context to the situation that I feel is important. These are things I’ve never shared publicly because I’ve preferred to remain neutral and give people the benefit of the doubt.

Zwei reached out to me when I was new to modding and she came across genuine and eager to help me, however it soon became clear her “help” and “friendship” came with major strings attached. She consistently placed restrictions on what I could and couldn't do - mods and locations she "preferred" I refrain from using – because they were “important to her lore.”  Soon it became other players in the community I wasn't allowed to talk to. It was like walking on eggshells to make my Cyberpunk content so as not to “upset” her and this was slowly sucking the joy out of creating. In addition, she would often spread rumors about others that I was expected to support, and she would even ask me to message people asking if they “copied her.” It made me so uncomfortable but since she seemed so powerful in the community I went along as best I could. I also often felt she made it a point to subtly put me down whenever possible and constantly complain to me when she felt she wasn't getting enough praise from devs or the community.

Zwei used "gifts" of "secret mods" to win my loyalty and insisted I also gatekeep and keep secrets from people. It was an incredibly manipulative relationship that mostly caused me stress and made me afraid to make the content I wanted to make.

On one occasion I made an image using a location in the game she felt she had ownership of and she instantly blocked me and deleted all of our Discord DMs. She later apologized for overreacting, and I forgave her.

During our friendship, I began hearing from friends, other players and even artists who had been treated the same way by her - in many cases way worse. In some cases they were even threatened financially, professionally (threats of legal action) or they were simply banned from Discord servers and other platforms based on rumors. Of course, some of these allegations are based on what I was told, others I’ve seen proof of, however there were many people who experienced almost identical incidents.    All of this brought up old scars for me when I was bullied and manipulated by mean girls all through school and I hated how it made me feel inferior and powerless. I’m old enough now to know the long-term damage it can do and I did not want others to go through that, especially gamer-nerd-types (such as myself) who have historically found themselves ostracized by mainstream society and popular cliques. I’ve met so many wonderful people through this community and my intent has truly always been to spread love with other players and just enjoy the game and my new found passion for VP and cinematic making.

 I finally had the courage to cut ties with Zwei last year but even when I tried to avoid her and her content all together I still saw that her terrible behavior had not changed and frankly it made me angry that others were continuing to be hurt by her and scared of her. This is when I took the frustration out in a petty fashion, probably after a few glasses of wine (sorry it's true) and I made some judgmental comments on Nexus using a throwaway account. I had also vented a lot to my partner who was also frustrated by how she had treated me, and another comment was made from his account. These instances happened a while ago and I had all but forgotten about it. Then earlier this week, after a long time away from playing I happened to open the Nexus mod main page for Cyberpunk and in real time I saw her and one of her friends attacking a new modder who made a vanilla preset that somewhat resembled her ZV OC. The bullying was so vile and public I felt particularly triggered by it. I assumed Nexus would take action this time if I reported it. I felt nervous about making a report from my main account – because as I have mentioned Zwei has a way of making people feel threatened and I was afraid of this. I thought it might be safer to submit the report from a throw-away account in case Nexus attached my name to the report. This proved to be my epic mistake. Instead of just deleting the report or sending me a warning, Nexus instantly made my privately submitted harassment report public, banned my main account, linked all the comments from the throwaway accounts and charged me with harassment (even though the bulk of my comments had just been an opinion on respecting actor’s likeness as CDPR had requested, and not using them for publicly posted explicit content). Nexus never warned my main account. They had issued one temporary warning to one of the other accounts but that was attached to my partner’s email which I never saw. I do think Nexus had a part in making all of this way bigger and worse than it ever needed to be, and even though I do take responsibility and I am apologetic for my part in it - I find their practice of public shaming to be dangerous and irresponsible.

Regardless, I stand by the report I made about Zwei and just hope this has taught some lessons all around and perhaps she will take some responsibility herself. I truly don’t hold grudges or hate toward her or anyone for that matter – but I do think that actions should have consequences. I’ll be taking some time away from everything for a while, but I will always continue to welcome new players and share my love of Cyberpunk2077.

-VS

She's known for doing that and everyone falls for it. We get where you're coming from Val and we hope you take some time to breathe and clear your head after that.

#cyberpunk 2077 #cyberpunk fandom

[pawseds]

I convinced our Delta Green game master to have a play-by-post (basically text roleplay) section in our game's server and uhhhhh maybe I've been having too much fun with it. Writing is faster than drawing comics, what can I say?

(Long ramble about writing stories below hehe oops)

While we're here! A bit about writing: I like writing! I've written for loger than I've drawn for (because school). I think I'm better at writing than drawing for that reason (I'm more confident at least). I've written short stories. I've written short stories about TTRPG things. I've also written a ~100k word novel by hand for 2 years. While writing it, I had 'writing class' (technically AS/A level Ennglish Language classes). It was the only class I had confidence in and high expectations for.

With those 2 combined, I burnt out pretty quick LOL. Specifically, I had a big perfectionism issue because of the high expectations I had from my teacher and especially myself -- it was the one thing I knew excelled at in school, so I better do it well! After I was done with the novel and A levels, I was supposed to edit the novel. It's been years and I haven't done it yet, and I wouldn't write non-assignment stories (except 2) until now. Writing became more nerverwracking than it was fun, so why would I?

To get back to the PBP thing: I've been in a campaign that was fully PBP. With my mindset being the way it is, hey! This is just one big writing exercise, so I ran along with that and had fun with it. I saw how some players would make their own PBP and essentially monologue/have a scene only with their PC. That was cool to see.

And now, my current Delta Green campaign (tagged 'Helvetia'). Hrothgar (guy in drawing) and his kids were ported over from a previous D&D campaign (the fully PBP one!), so the crew had a very well defined background already. Of course I get tons of drawing ideas for them, except I don't have the time to draw them all (compsci hard). But since the server has a PBP section, I had like 2 weeks to kill between session 0 and 1, and I was bursting with ideas... I made a lot of solo PBPs that were essentially short stories.

It didn't quite hit me until some time ago, but the PBPs actually made me enjoy writing again -- enjoy it a lot more, in fact! I think the format of Discord threads and messages removed most perfectionism tendencies I had. I just had to fire the story away, message by message. It didn't have to be amazing, and it was fun! (Also I really don't know how to shut up with them LOL)

I'll definitely be cleaning these PBPs up and posting them here as stories. Some of them are just silly, fun, slice-of-life character sketches. (These were the stories I wrote after my novel... and yes, they were about my other set of Delta Green characters LMAO) (and I've posted them here under pawsedswrite btw!) But some I see as legitamite short stories that I would edit more heavily and present as a short story. They were the kinds I could see myself writing on a document rather than on Discord.

Well, I lied. 'I would edit' is false. I have already edited one, because I spent like 5-6h writing this one PBP (oops) instead of writing the draft for my short story class/elective (oops 2). I joked to my two friends saying that I could just submit it as my assignment. Apparently, they both really liked it and said the dialogued slapped. So I did!

I procrastinated like hell on it though, because I was very nervous to go back into the PBP with an axe to edit it. Being in a writing class where nearly everyone else has been formally studying writing for some years kinda puts some pressure on ya!

Like the last assignment (which I'll post here after editing), I had a lot of worries. But the feedback and grade I got from my last assignment, the peer review I got from the current one, and also the support from those two friends (shoutout @katastrofish <3) made me feel more confident in myself. And also the fact that I had a lot of fun editing the PBP!

Uhhh this ramble was way longer than expected LMFAO if you've made it this far, damn, thanks for reading! If you also write or have similar experiences, feel free to share em. And have a good day!

(bonus POV editing)

#helvetia #pawsedswrite #ttrpg character #pawsedsart #art #original character #character art #oc #oc art #ttrpg campaign #ttrpg oc #original character art #oc artist #oc artwork #oc story #ocs #my ocs #my art #artists on tumblr #drawing #sketch #sketches #oc meme #ttrpg writing #creative writing #writing #writeblr #writers on tumblr #writing memes #oc rp

[astriiformes]

I've received a number of grateful messages from folks at school about how I handled the difficult situation we ran into the other day in the queer student center where someone really needed to step up and mediate things, as well as another situation I handled in our Discord server today, and it's got some complicated and I think much-needed thoughts turning around in my head.

I really struggle with self-esteem. It was more fragile than I realized as a kid, and crumbled completely when I started running into trouble with college, since academic success was pretty much the only thing propping it up. I've never really rebuilt it since. I've worked on it, and I won't say I've made no progress. But it's still a total shambles, and I still have a lot of trouble liking myself at all. Everywhere I turn it seems like I make mistakes that hurt my self-image instead of helping it -- struggling with school again, dropping the ball on other responsibilities, getting stressed out over my friendships and having trouble trusting people or understanding why they even like me, etc. No matter how hard I try, I don't like myself as an academic, or a colleague, or as a friend.

But I do consistently like the person I am when I intervene in stressful situations as a mediator. I like the version of me that gently explains the ways we ought to have compassion for each other, and how no movement will ever get anywhere important if we spend all our time tearing each other down. I like the person who faces down cops and asks if they've read my neighbors their rights, even though my voice shakes the whole time, who talks loudly and openly about trans and queer issues in class, who marched down the street to a local elementary school running a food drive when my city was in crisis and asked if they needed any help, and who shows up for protests in below-freezing weather.

I've said before that I don't know what I want to do after I graduate, but I know it needs to be something where I feel like I'm having a positive impact on the world. But I think it's bigger than that. I think it's something I genuinely need to arrange my life around more, whatever that looks like. I have imposter syndrome in the extreme, and am always convinced someone else will do a better job than me at anything important. And I think one reason activism and advocacy feel a little different is because even though I'm usually terrified, I'm stepping up to do things that other people are too scared to do, or need help to do at all.

The other day my school hosted an activism and advocacy networking event with alumni in social justice-oriented jobs. And I talked to several people who were interesting during the first few rotations around the room, but I ended up spending about half the evening chatting with someone who used to be a part of the same queer student group on campus that I'm in now, and has since gone on to co-found a black liberation organization here in the Cities -- where I remember dropping off medical supplies for protestors back in 2020. We talked about a lot of things, but one of them was about finding the intersection of everything that makes you.... you.... and figuring out where in the world that's needed and chasing that.

I don't know what that is exactly, and I'm not sure exactly where a transgender-aro-ace-neurodivergent-mental illness-disabled-historian-scientist-writer-orator-musician-mediator-???-activist belongs or has the most to offer. Especially one who also has often-debilitating anxiety. But I think when I get scared about the future -- or when I'm spiraling over how much I hate myself, or how I think other people can do the things I care about better -- I need to remember that the version of myself I like the most is the one that fights for other people. And that other people seem to appreciate that person too.

It's not a solution for my problems with self-esteem, but I think it might be a start.

#screaming into the void a little about figuring out what all this might actuallyspell for me career-wise but #it's one of those things you take one step at a time i suppose #once again repeating my general life philosophy that i need to leave this world better than i found it or i'll die

[kizzer55555]

Hi! I’m new to tumblr but I recently got a message that referenced a fic I wrote on ao3. So I’m just going to go out and confirm that yes, I am the same author as Adoption Runs in the Family. It’s about Danny being on the run and ending up in Gotham. Only instead of getting adopted by Bruce Wayne, he ends up running into the ghost of Thomas and Martha Wayne instead. This was actually inspired by a discord server I’m on. The idea was mentioned by someone about a what if Danny was adopted by Martha and Thomas instead. I latched onto it and started asking all kinds of questions about what that would mean. Then me and that person, Robyn, basically went back and forth to develop scenes and situations and it only got more and more chaotic from there. We stopped discussing it (often moving on to various other fanfic ideas) but I loved the idea so much I decided to write it out. Ironically, I haven’t even reached the part of the fic we discussed yet. That would be the part where Danny actually meets the bat family. The starting concept was Danny going to school and then we moved on from there. But I’m one of those people where everything has to make sense so I needed to write exactly how Danny ended up with Martha and Thomas and why he saw them as his parents. I completely underestimated how long that would be lol. In my outline, it’s literally one paragraph but I’ve already written over 20,000 words for it. So this is probably going to be a long fic. It’s also the first one I’ve ever posted so that’s exciting. 😁

#new to tumblr #rambles #adoption runs in the family #archive of our own #Martha and Thomas adopt Danny #dcxdp #dpxdc crossover #dpxdc fanfic

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

🍣🍤🦪(for ID)

AITA for talking about rejecting a confession on a discord server without realising that the person who confessed was also in the same discord server? This happened a few years ago but I still think about it a lot. At the time I (19F) got confessed to by my friend, M (19NB) on new years day through discord. I'd been pretty much best friends with them for a couple of years, we initially met online through fandom and found out we (and a few other online friends) live in the same city and met up every few months to go to cons, eat food, watch movies, etc. Looking back on it in hindsight, I guess a few things we did could have been interpreted as being 'romantic' but I didn't realise it, both as an aroace who has never had any inclination towards romance or intimacy and as at the time as I went to an all-girls high school and my highschool friend group generally is very touchy, as in we hug, link arms as we walk, hold hands when we're chilling, and that behaviour definitely bled into my relationships with my online friend group when we'd meet up irl. I'd also been going on these outings with just M more recently, since we both were in University and our schedules matched up really well. I was working my waitress job on new years day, since it was super busy I ducked into a back room to catch a break and pulled out my phone and I see a message from M confessing to me. It definitely blindsided me and I panicked a bit since this was the first time anyone has ever confessed to me or even made a move towards me that I noticed but I definitely did not reciprocate any feelings in the same way. I tried to let them down as nicely as I could and they asked for some time but said they'd be ok with being just friends, eventually. This is the point where I kind of fucked up, I went into a larger server's vent channel and kind of freaked out in there, pretty much right after the conversation. I never stated any names or revealed any incriminating information, more along the lines of "I just got confessed to and I rejected them but what if it ruins everything because they're my best friend" but I didn't realise that M was also in the same server, they'd never ever spoken in it and since we were in pretty much dozens of servers together, that specific server was cascaded pretty far down the "mutual servers" list. I only realised they were there when they sent me a dm asking me not to talk about it and I asked if they wanted me to delete, which they said yes and I did. We didn't talk again after that and M left all the mutual servers we'd been in. I actually dropped off all contact from that group for a few months, since M was the one to introduce me to that friend group, I felt really ashamed especially because it felt like my friends there were M's friends first. M's mental health was also really bad and they'd mentioned that they'd self-harmed before and tried to take drastic measures before and the guilt kind of ate at me for months until they dmed me again and I did my best to apologise for my actions, which they accepted and we agreed to be amicable if we ever met up coincidentally again. Then they acted like a snake about some other friend drama so like BYE and this was a few years ago so I don't really care but every now and then I still think that if I didn't speak about the confession in that disc server maybe I could've maintained a friendship with them.

AITA for talking about the rejected confession in a discord server without knowing the confessor was in the same discord server?

#aita #am i the asshole #self harm cw #suicide cw

[yourkimjaejin]

~ 6:28 pm, Sometime in 2021, Aurora/Moxy/Haechan/Taeyong ~

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

“Did you get along with the 127 members noona? Like when you were added to the group.” Aurora asked out of the blue.

Moxy barks out a laugh, “HA! No!”

“What.” 

“Yeah seriously. The only members that I was cool with were Donghyuck, Johnny and Doyoung oppa. I’m pretty sure Taeyong hated me. Like the day of my high school graduation, Taeyong lied about having a dance practice just so Johnny and Doyoung couldn’t meet Grandma Jin. He almost made me stay back to practice alone for two hours. Thank God for Soonjae-noona. She covered for me.” 

“Why didn’t any of us know?”

“Unspoken rule. No 127 drama reaches the Dreamies. You all were going thru a lot at the time. Debuting. Jaemin injury. The ticking timebomb that was Marks graduation. There was no reason for you guys to get sucked into our drama.”

Moxy could see the gears turning in the maknaes head. “Huh.”

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Haechan was sitting on the couch watching a new drama with Johnny and Taeyong. His phone buzzed with an incoming message. Haechan grabbed his phone. Taeyong looks on seeing the younger puzzled at the message before texting back. 

“Who’s that?” 

“Rora,” Haechan took a sip of his coke, “She wanted to know where you were.” 

“Oh.” The three turned back to the show. All was silent for a moment before Haechan sat up. 

“Just putting this out there. I hold no responsibility for what Aurora does with the information I’ve given her. Her actions are her own and I, Lee Donghyuck, am not to be held accountable. Thank you.” Haechan leaned back onto the couch ignoring the looks from his elder members. 

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

There was a knock at the door. The three boys were taking a break to order food. Johnny figured it was the delivery man so he got up to open it. Before he could get the door open, Aurora barged in. Aurora looked like a girl on a mission so who was he to stop her. Aurora stormed over, stopping directly in front of Taeyong. He tried to greet her but before he could Aurora clocked him with a right hand

“OH!!” Haechan jumps out of his seat in shock. Quickly, color fills Taeyong’s left cheek as the bruise takes form. Taeyong sat shocked at the actions of nct’s youngest members. One look at the fury written in Aurora’s eyes and Taeyong was hit with reality. 

He knew exactly Aurora was mad. 

And honestly he deserved it. 

“Thats for treating Moxy noona like crap and because she’s too nice to give you the punch you deserved.” And with that Aurora stormed right back out the door. Leaving like nothing happened. They all sat quietly, not really knowing what to say.

“I just want to reiterate, I have nothing to do with that. My hands are clean.” 

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Just a little side note. Those of my readers that are in the nct oc discord server, this post is for you if anyone remembers suggesting this but its been sitting in my drafts waiting until I posted the finale to the Taeyong!angst

Taglist: @alixnsuperstxr / @1-800-call-ria / @sophrodite / @sunflower-0180

#NCT AG #NCT AG.Moxy #NCT AG.Aurora #NCT AG.Writing #nct female addition #nct female member #kpop addition #kpop!au #kpop!oc #kpop!addition #nct female oc #kpop female member

[piracytheorist]

Having slept on it a little - and after some very intense, though not scary or particularly upsetting, dreams I had during said sleep - I thought about providing some context to what I shared yesterday.

So I was part of a discord server for sxf fans. On this server there were some channels specifically for anime only fans, where manga spoilers weren't meant to be discussed. I was the only anime-only there talking so much, but other people joined me multiple times and we talked about analysis and stuff. However, that didn't work out that much because people often forgot what channel they were in, or they forgot what constitutes manga spoiler and what does not, and by the fifth spoiler I got (where I also had to convince the other person that it was indeed a spoiler), I decided to take my leave.

So what I say here comes purely from memory; I have no access right now to those discussions and I don't want to rejoin the server just to take screenshots.

During my stay in that server, someone read my meta about Damian being both a bully and a victim and tagged me in the channel, telling me they agreed with me and we along with a few others had a short discussion on the matter, in which I used the word "biased" to refer to Damian fans who try to prove that he's not a bully. The conversation flowed then ended, no-one tried to change anyone's minds, and I went on with my day.

Due to the nature of the channel and the fact that I was the only anime-only around theorizing and analyzing, the channel stayed quiet, with the last messages being of our conversation about Damian. A few days later I spotted activity in the channel, and I saw someone defending themselves and their fellow fans about not being biased, and wanting to start a conversation about why Damian is not a bully.

Now, having known that in the manga there have been certain developments, I asked them if they refer to manga context or anime context, cause this channel is specifically for anime context only. They insisted it was anime context only and we started a discussion. They indeed only used context that was already covered in the anime, so spoilers were not an issue, but they went above and beyond trying to prove that Damian is not a bully, he instead protects Anya and cares about her, and if he does treat her bad that's because he's a tsundere type and it's all narrative purpose so it's not that bad.

To me, it was clear that though they didn't use manga context, they were greatly influenced by it.

We had a lot of back and forth on the matter, practically going in circles, and what I gathered was that they were upset I called Damian fans "biased". I did not back down from this. I still wouldn't. I consider it a bias to see a character like Damian, see how he treats not only Anya but his fellow classmates as well, and then you go above and beyond trying to prove like he's not a bully and then tell people shouldn't feel upset by his behaviour by using the "tsundere" shield.

Anyway, we decided to end the conversation with no hard feelings, but I did say, a day later and tagging the certain person, that just because they call Damian a tsundere it doen't erase the emotional damage his behaviour inflicts on Anya. They backed down after that.

Right after, we went around in circles with some other people, who actually agreed that Damian is a bully but one specific person told me I shouldn't use the word "bully" to describe him, because it's a heavy word and it can make his fans upset and turn them defensive. Practically, telling me I shouldn't publicly use the correct term we all agree fits on Damian because that will have fans angry and upset with me and inspire an emotionally charged conversation.

I decided to put my foot down and say that no, I will not back down from this. I was bullied at school, I'm only just now, ten years after I finished school, finally exploring that trauma with my therapist, and I do not intend to baby people who put their feelings for a fictional character over real people's feelings for their trauma. Again the conversation was civil but we had to end it since we again drove ourselves in circles, but at the end of it I really felt like I was made to be the bad guy who is too emotional to survive in fandom. Me, not the people who get so upset by other people calling a bully character a "bully" to the point that there are people who disagree with them but still baby them because "they will get upset".

I decided to let things be. We finished the conversation civilly, I even apologized in case I was too emotional, was a bit comforted for it, and we left things there. Some too many spoilers for my liking later, I left the server entirely.

Flash forward to yesterday. I see what's crystal-clear bully behaviour from Damian to Anya, and my very first thought is "The people in that server had read that manga chapter. They knew this was a thing that transpired. Yet I was made to be the bad guy in the situation?"

And yeah, well, I came here and exploded. I felt disgusted. I felt used for the vindication of one (1) Damian fan, I felt like I was being gaslighted when people told me I shouldn't call him a bully when we had more bullying from him down the road, and above all, it solidified my feeling that I don't feel safe in this fandom.

I want to make clear that I've found many wonderful people in this fandom, fans and non-fans of Damian alike, who have a great presence either though discussions or creations or memes or whatever. But if I was to be dragged out and genuinely told that I have to baby Damian fans, as if I wouldn't eventually see the way Damian would continue bullying Anya... if I'm to meet just one person like that again, I will fucking explode. Even the presence of one person like that - who is accepted in the fandom, to boot - makes the fandom at large an unsafe environment for me. I'm glad I've found certain people who make me feel safe and understood, but for the most part... this will just be another reason why I don't consider myself a part of the sxf fandom, it seems.

#nette speaks #personal #long post

[bfpnola]

IMAGE DESCRIPTION UNDER THE CUT.

A new task force! Admittedly when we first discussed this, we were a bit upset, knowing how passionate we were to start up a new media literacy workshop for the summer. But upon further thought, honest conversations like these need to happen in every organization, ones where we admit our current capabilities and limitations so as to best protect everyone's time and energy while simultaneously continuing to fulfill our mission statement.

Further, we've already noticed a weight lifted amongst our volunteers! We utilized yesterday's Sunday meeting time to discuss BFP's history thus far, what it means to be a 501(c)(3), the nonprofit industrial complex, why we utilize a horizontal organizational structure, and then the best part? Our core beliefs! We only got to the first three (the right to organize, intersectionality, and educational equity), but the conversation was SO productive! Youth were given the chance to openly ask and answer questions with fellow activists around the globe. Even with just those three topics, we were able to cover: organizing tips, COINTELPRO, the gamification of politics, elite capture, epistemic injustice, the infantilisation faced by those at the intersection of transness and disability, equity vs equality, and accommodations in school! So much!

Next Sunday we'll continue this educational dialogue, so feel free to join us on Zoom (link available through our Discord server as well as college and career mentorship, peer support, mutual aid, private channels for marginalized communities, and the space to openly ask any social justice related questions without shame)! And once we eventually cover all of our core beliefs, BFP will officially begin designing a specific mission and timeline for this new task force, ensuring that all of us fully understand what our nonprofit stands for before making concrete decisions. Genuinely so excited to see how our little family transforms as we have already learned so much from one another in just one meeting since making this decision :)

[P.S. We do have bots in our server that can translate text messages for our non-English speakers, bots for those with dissociative identity disorder so their alters/fronts appear as different accounts with different names, bots for our nightly studying and music sessions, nonverbal emotes, and more!]

[ID: All 10 slides are a very pale mint green with a white circle made of diagonal stripes inside of a white tilted square made of thick dashes as the background. In the foreground is a white rectangle with curved edges meant to mimic an iPhone's "Notes" app with the bold, italics, underline, strikethrough, numbered list, and bullet point icons pictured at the bottom of the rectangle. Which icon is being highlighted shifts with each slide depending on the formatting of the text. At the top left corner, it reads "Notes" with a small arrow pointing left. And at the top right corner, "@bfpnola."

The slides read as follows:

"Honoring our dedication to transparency, this is BFP's current state of affairs:

Developing proper onboarding

Activity & Retention Task Force

Nonprofit Industrial Complex"

BFP was originally founded in 2016 by a team of 12 year olds in New Orleans, Louisiana. As the organization grew internationally and the work became more complex, we began to lose volunteers almost immediately as they joined. Why? We didn't have a proper onboarding process, aka a clear and efficient orientation and trainings for newcomers! As kids ourselves, none of us had entered the workforce yet so we weren't even aware that "onboarding" existed. Because of this, new hires would either become overwhelmingly confused and leave or be thrown straight into the work and burn out. As young adults now, we aim to create an efficient onboarding process and share our discoveries with other youth organizations in the future!

Due to that confusion, BFP has become incapable of hosting any more large-scale workshops, as we have failed to thoroughly prepare our newer volunteers with clarity. We owe it to those directly impacted by coercive hierarchies to do better. So, what's next for us? On 03/26, we decided to create a cross-committee Activity & Retention Task Force. This team will be dedicated to expanding our audience, maintaining the family that we've curated thus far, analyzing the success and failures of our work, and most importantly... Emphasizing BFP as a safe space for marginalized youth globally. With such a diverse team, we are always learning from one another and we'd like to continue sharing that opportunity with as many people as possible. But there's something we'd like to keep in mind!

The Nonprofit Industrial Complex. We are aware as a 501(c)(3) that organizations' radical missions can often become co-opted either by their donors or distracted by their own maintenance. If BFP ever becomes too focused on its own survival rather than that of the oppressed… We will take that needed step back. Community should always be our focus. This task force is meant to broaden youth’s access to political education and peer support, not necessarily propel BFP within the nonprofit industry. The people must come first and foremost.

More concrete steps will be released soon to hold ourselves accountable. We look forward to improving this organization so that BFP can put out the work that y'all deserve and that we know we are capable of producing. Thank you for reading! Check the caption for more information."

End ID.]

#reaux speaks #nonprofit #announcement #organizing #intersectionality #educational equity #discord #elite capture #epistemic injustice #disability justice #trans #queer #neurodivergent #youth #equity #mutual aid #dissociative identity disorder