#this is platonic again but I’m not against romantic subtext or whatever

[seagull-scribbles]

I want you to tell ‘em that you love the way that they don’t stick out like sore middle fingers

[Continuation of this]

#TMNT 2012 #casey jones 2012 #raphael hamato #rasey #this is platonic again but I’m not against romantic subtext or whatever #when I was in school being able to do this with your hand was super cool and I often still do it with both #but I’ve met both adults and kids who’ve never seen it before and it freaks them out ahaha #anyway I was jus thinking of hands again and this is a warm up sketch #but i do think thee two would have heart to hearts on rooftops sometimes and really open up #maybe theyre sat next to eachother and raph looks at his thigh next to Casey’s and gets self conscious #maybe one of them was hurt in a fight (probably Casey) and theyre patching eachother up and they just start exploring their differences #or maybe its something as simple as raph asking casey if he was Tarzan and the scene with the hands and Casey’s like yo we can do that #or even more childish theyre just doing it to see who’s hands bigger because Casey’s sister has been doing it a lot and its fun #because let me tell you it doesnt matter how old the kids i work with are they all love comparing my hand with theirs #but i imagine Raphs eyes for a second would give away hes upset a little cause he’s definitely the most self conscience about being a mutant #so Casey would do this and be like ahh look see we arent that different really #raph could bend his fingers to emphasise how much shorter Casey’s are #and cause would say something like these digits might be small but theyre mighty #leading to a shove or even a thumb war or something #anyway ill stop gushing i have a comission to do xxx #OH OH OH THE BITE MARK ON CASEY IS BECAUSE A MUTUAL COMMENTS ABOUT EATING MY RASEY ART SO THATS THEIR TEETH but im not naming names....

[cto10121]

Breaking Dawn quick points Part 2

Bella is so much fun as a vampire, I can’t believe I’ve forgotten. I think even the movie critics liked Vampire Bella in the movie, if I recall correctly. Vampire Horny Bella is officially my favorite Bella

Renesmee. Verbally it’s okay, even nice, especially if you pronounce in the Spanish-Italian way instead of the lazy Anglo way (Renesme, dai!). On the written page it looks like the ship name for Renée/Esme on AO3. That said, I don’t quite know what could have been a better name that had the same mythic and romantic ring. Maybe Elizabeth? Too common, perhaps. I think it’s just that extra e that tips it into fanfic territory.

The Loch Ness monster scene was priceless. Personally, I would have preferred Nessa as a nickname, but whatevs. Even the movie pulled that off well, I remember

Charlie. I do like the idea of him knowing, but I can’t believe Meyer had him on the loop so early and so cavalierly. Jacob just one day up and…just phasing in front of him. I had a feeling she had planned for that important bit at the end but knew she had to include it early to make room for that Volturi plot. Either way, it should have been much later when Bella was not so new. (That said, Charlie’s reaction is so on point. Homeboy was like “You know what? I don’t want to know. How’s the game?”)

I remember feeling a bit cheated that Bella had so much self-control as a newborn. That said, it does make some sense given Bella’s human affinity for vampirism and her internalized character. I have a feeling Meyer had tons of outline to burn through and so was rushing the development a bit. At the very least she should have kept Bella’s tests at a bare minimum.

Jacob’s imprinting. I’m not against the whole Jacob/Renesmee ship—on the contrary, I like it, and it is a necessary resolution to the love triangle. Also, it’s a common trope of romance to set up the secondary pairing just as the first pairing is fully consummated. But the execution was…not great. Meyer should have left it for an Epilogue when Renesmee was older. She could have kept Jacob away from Renesmee, possibly leave La Push after Bella’s vampiric turn, and then return to meet a grown Renesmee for the first time. On the other hand, the imprinting schema itself kills romance—it’s basically a meta cheat, an authorial slight-of-hand (Here are the present and/or future couples of this universe that I’m too lazy to write btw—enjoy!). If Meyer is going to write a Jacob/Renesmee book as I’ve heard, she will need to find some way to separate the two and build a new romantic paradigm. Renesmee will need to experience adolescence at least, develop her own character, and the platonic bond will need to be destabilized and eased into a romantic one.

That said, I do dislike it far less than I did when I read it. It does allow for some really interesting narrative possibilities. I would be interested in a Jacob/Renesmee follow-up—given Renesmee’s unique abilities and background, the possibilities for all kinds of conflict are there. You have her half-vampire half-human abilities, belonging to neither world; Nahuel being the only one of her kind (a special bond?); her affinity for Jacob…perhaps her growing needs away from her close-knit family. I know the fandom is supremely toxic towards Meyer, but honestly she is the best author when it comes to deep first person POV.

The movie fucked up with the CGI doll. Book Renesmee is the right mix of adorable, unique, and creepy, like a vampire baby should.

“‘The Volturi aren’t supposed to be the villains, the way they seem to you. They are the foundations of our peace and civilization. Each member of the guard chooses to serve them.’” Meyer made this subtext once again explicit. It rings a little hollow, though. Since Eclipse the Volturi were villain coded, a dark mirror of the Cullens, instead of the lawful neutral force they are meant to represent. By all accounts they should be eager for an excuse to spare the Cullens, if just on the hope that they could persuade them to join the guard. On the other hand, this is very much Bella’s perspective, colored by her human experience.

Garrett/Kate FTW. Actually Carlisle’s friends are all fascinating. This has always been a favorite part for me. I just wish most of it was not general summary; Meyer had a lot of ground to cover, clearly.

#cristina reads #breaking dawn #now i’m thinking about that jacob and renesmee book #is it just me or did meyer actually said she was going to write it #my memory may be faulty

[ilcaeryx]

Cascade [Gojo Satoru/Reader]

Summary: Satoru picks you up after a wild night in Tokyo’s party districts. While he’s dying to be more than your close friend, he won’t act until he’s certain you want him, too.

Tags: Gojo Satoru/Reader, Cute, Fluff, Humor, Slight angst, Nightlife, Pining, Pre-relationship

Word Count: Almost 2k

Author’s Note: Feels good to complete something. I listened to The Rose’s cover of ILYSB while writing this.

---

Gojo Satoru’s 1AM drive to one of Tokyo’s nightlife district was strictly for serious business. While he would fit into the crowd of youthful people enjoying the neon stinging their eyes and body contact with at least four strangers at all times, he had zero intentions on partying. Indeed, his sole mission was to retrieve a package – that package being you.

Lulled into rumination by the car engines constant humming, Satoru pondered about your occupation of his mind. Even though his days were busy, he would associate the concept of you with quite literally anything. Bickering with the higher ups? He could envision himself cranking up the drama as he told you the story, smiling smugly inwards at you cooking him comfort food to soothe ‘his stressful day’. Whenever something hilarious or crazy happened, he would automatically think ‘I’ll tell Y/N this later’. One would expect it would annoy him but it was not the case; Satoru was entertained by his daily fantasies, very much enthralled by the walking-on-clouds-feeling his body would produce during his mental escapades. If one Y/N thought equalled one endorphin molecule, he was experiencing a cascade.

His first thought after awakening every morning was your face between his palms, his fingers frigid against your temples. If things between you two ever developed, one day your face would be his first experience that day, every day for the rest of his life. Right now, Satoru would pin your relationship as close friends. As much as he would overinterpret your behaviour towards him, he was quite certain you were not interested in discovering whatever else could unfold between the two of you. Not yet, his positive inner self protested. Maybe never, his negative inner self retorted.

Despite his conflicting emotions, he gathered himself up into a presentable version of himself while he walked to the nightclub your friend had mentioned. Your safety was his number one priority right now, regardless if you were into him romantically or not.

~~~

“Text me when you’re home!” you yelled over the pulsating music, bidding your friend farewell by blowing her a kiss. In a dramatic motion, she caught the invisible kiss in her palm and clutched it against her chest.

“I will! Stay safe, bitch!” she screeched back before submerging into the human current outside the club, her cursed energy swashing to and fro like a solar flare.

Even though his evening had been a cozy movie-night in his bedroom, Satoru’s limbs felt heavy from looking at you. With your shoulders drooping and hands massaging your left thigh, you were finally punished from dancing non-stop all evening. Indeed, your hair clung to your forehead, neck and upper arms, intermingling with the shining perspiration on your skin. Nevertheless, you seemed to relish in whatever banger was playing inside as you were gently swaying side to side.

“I know what you’re thinking,” you said, pre-emptively shushing him with your index finger in the air. “But I’ll take a shower once I’m home.”

“I was actually thinking that I should’ve brought a towel, considering that your sweat’ll soak the car seat,” he said and tucked some slick strands away from your face. Your mortified look cracked him up. “It’s fine, I’ll lend you my jacket.”

“Your expensive-ass jacket? Thanks, I’d rather freeze to death.”

He rolled back his shoulders as he slid his jacked halfway down his back, hands still in his pockets. A little disappointment tinged his tongue. “Are you sure? I warmed it up just for you.”

“Yeah, stop stripping and let’s get the hell out of here.” You smacked his back with an open hand, pushing him onwards. “God, I can’t wait until we get home. I’m so tired. Are we going to your place?”

Let’s not read into anything, Satoru thought. ‘Anything’ meant both your off-hand comment about his place and the fact that your hand remained steady on his back even after you two joined the crowd. Physical closeness wasn’t anything new between you but the context provided another layer of complexity to read into. Suddenly, being the completely sober adult in charge seemed like too heavy a responsibility for him...

Without meaning to, his back tensed up. “No, you weirdo. You can sleep off the alcohol in your own bed.”

You either weren’t bothered by his tenseness or you didn’t notice, as you shifted your hand around his waist. You carefully leaned against his arm. “Sounds boring. Don’t you want to talk all night?”

Like always, your presence burned his arm, enough that he was unable to feel the strangers he bumped into on his other side. This was a sign, right? Or were you flirting as a friend? In the past, he had people confess their ‘love’ for him and apparently they thought his teasing and touching meant he fancied them. Being extremely lovable wasn’t easy, especially not when any platonic affection could be re-constructed as romantic by the other part. You, too, were extremely lovable and affectionate… Had he been in your shoes, this proximity wouldn’t have had any romantic subtext. But unlike him, you had a good personality… This could be the night you two finally spoke about whatever was between you two.

Or the night where you lose a friend because of your stupidity, his negativity brought up.

It had a point. Yeah, you were a good person and a terrific friend – he’d be an idiot if he lost you. Compared to his co-workers and allies, you were awfully soft; he liked how you doted on him, even when he was a pain in the ass. If you rejected him now, your dynamic wouldn’t be the same and his life would be much harder for it.

“We can talk later today,” he said, his arm automatically shooting out to stop an accidental elbow-right-into-your-chest-accident. He settled his arm around your shoulder after giving the guy the evil guy through his glasses. Watch your limbs, man.!

“That was close,” you said, sighing. “Thank you, Satoru! I’m sorry about having to call you out this late, by the way. Did I wake up you?”

He both cursed and rejoiced on the inside now that you changed subject. “Couldn’t be helped that your friend had an emergency. Next time, try to wake me up later for an early breakfast instead.”

“Next time, you’re coming with us.”

His lips faltered slightly, smile not feeling as genuine. He adjusted the collar on his jacket to hide it. “To the nightclub?”

Your index finger jabbed into his side accusingly. “Anywhere! Last time we hung out was… uh…”

This was the first time in a few weeks you two had spoken in person by yourselves. As you both mostly met together with your friends, you tended to invite him whenever the gang planned something. He admitted to himself that he often declined because he only wanted your company, but you never offered to join him instead. Whenever he invited you out, you’d be perfectly alright with hanging out just the two of you, though.

“Two weeks ago?” He squinted into the lights of an incoming car. “It’s because of work but-“

“I’m not a hikikomori, you bastard – I’ve got a job too, but I’ll make time for you, you know?”

You’d make time for anyone, Satoru thought, somewhat discouraged.

The crowd thinned out as you entered the parking lot, though the place was jam-packed with cars. Both of you remained quiet as you passed by couples on the way to Satoru’s car. When you detached yourself from his side, he rustled your hair. You stood on your tippy-toes to return the favour, messing up his hair worse than he did yours. He liked seeing you struggle to reach his head, so he didn’t mind.

“I missed you, scarecrow,” you said, pinching his cheek. He elongated his smile to feel one knuckle touch his lips. “What is the gremlin and scarecrow duo without the scarecrow?”

~~~

Slumped against the window, you were peaceful the entire ride home. Every so often, Satoru would catch a glimpse of your sleepy face and his heart would clam up. He made the right decision in picking you up, even though he aged weeks in those twenty minutes you two had spoken. Your interactions followed a pattern: he’d look forward to meeting you, creating fantasies and expectations of what could be; when you were with him, he would attempt not to ruin your current friendship to the point where he’d feel sick; and whenever you two parted, he’d overindulge in his memories. In two days, he’d be prepared to undergo this rollercoaster once again.

He drove into your street and called your name.

You immediately woke up and looked outside. “What time is it?”

“Almost 2AM…” he exhaled deeply, hands falling into his lap. He still had to drive home, so he’d be in bed in 30 minutes.

“Everything hurts,” you said, bending forward to readjust your high heels. “My legs are killing me… I won’t be able to walk tomorrow. I’m not sure I can walk now.”

He understood what the lilting tone at the end of your sentence meant and with great effort he stepped out of the car. Your giddiness as he opened the car-door on your side was intoxicating, as was the feeling of seeing you stretch your arms towards his neck. He cradled one arm below your thighs and one behind your back.

“Watch your head,” you chided softly into his ear, covering the top of his head as he carried you out of the car.

“Gimme keys.” Satoru leaned slightly backwards to account for your weight as you handed him the key to your apartment. With your bare arms against his neck, he would be surprised if you didn’t notice how his pulse rose.

Your apartment door opened and he stepped into darkness, shutting it behind his back.

“Excuse me,” he mumbled, heading for your bedroom with his shoes on. Your teeny apartment had a teeny bedroom with a single sized bed.

“Say, Satoru,” you said, your cheek pressed below his ear, “are you sure you don’t want to stay and talk?”

“Just go to sleep, Y/N.” Satoru leaned over your bed to carefully lay you down. Your grip on his neck loosened and he thought you’d comply until you kissed his neck, his soul almost as soft as your lips.

“What about now?” you asked and released your arms, falling onto your bed. Your hair spilled around you, a gloria around your tired face. “I’ll let you sleep in my bed, if you want to.”

Honestly, he wanted this. Everything he’d thought of earlier this night could become true if he gave in, which was insane enough to send his head swimming. He’d endure this cramped bed for you, even with his feet being colder than hell and his back aching from sleeping on his side. Gojo Satoru was more than ready.

However, he did not want this to backfire. What if you were simply too horny, lonely, exhausted or intoxicated to consider the consequences right now?

You rolled towards the wall, leaning on your side. Your eyelids fluttered weakly, your exhaustion almost overtaking your body and yet you found enough strength to pat the empty space beside you. “See, there’s space. I’ll always leave space for you.”

Ah, fuck it.

Satoru’s personality was bad; his attitude was self-indulgent; his morality was concrete grey; and his discipline when it came to you near non-existent. If you awoke tomorrow and found that you had fallen asleep with the love of your life – then great, you were both on the same page. If he had completely misunderstood your intentions, he would absolutely bullshit his way out of trouble, like he always did. Whatever, everything’d be alright someday.

---

If you enjoyed this, give me a like/follow/reblog/comment/scream into the void. I hope everyone had a good New Year and let’s hope that 2021 is kind.

Started this 22/11/2020, finished 10/01/2021.

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk x reader #gojo x reader #gojo satoru #jjk #gojo satoru x reader #jjk reader inserts

[orionsangel86]

what are your thoughts on the deancas endgame.. how will they resolve the Empty.. any thoughts?

Ah that old question! How it pains us all! :P

What are my thoughts on DeanCas endgame now? Honestly it changes everyday!

When Cas first made his deal with the Empty, it seemed so damn obvious to me that it would be a lead up to overt canon Destiel. At the time I was pretty sure that there was nothing else that could bring Cas that level of happiness. Now I’m not so sure. Cas’s devotion to Jack has only grown, and the fracturing of the Winchester family at the end of Season 14 was a huge hit to him. I can now easily envisage something as simple as Cas being invited to carve his name on the bunker table being the trigger point, so long as Jack is alive and well. Being part of the Winchester family has definitely been the principle factor the writers have built on for Cas over the past season. I therefore think that if the Empty does come for Cas, it will be from something familial, something like Jack and the Winchesters all sitting around and them paying specific attention to Cas for doing something great, like actually stopping a monster, saving a ton of people, and doing it all the human way, leading to a very impressed Sam and a loved up Dean beaming at him and telling him to carve his initials, and making sure he adds the W.

As much as I would love it and ascend to fandom heaven if it happened, I don’t think the empty deal is gonna be triggered by Dean grabbing and kissing Cas up against his bedroom door, or even actually saying a very clearly romantic “I love you”. Not that I don’t think that will happen at all, but I feel the Empty deal will need to be addressed very soon, and I just can’t see any overt confirmation of Destiel in text before the very end (if at all) at this point.

Please let me explain my thought process on this before anyone get’s upset or jumps on me.

Season 15, imo, has done a lot for Destiel. Since the very first episode we have had a clear emotional storyline specific to Dean and Cas. Their relationship drama has basically fuelled the emotional heart of the season so far. It has lead to journalists, interviewers, and plenty of check marks on Twitter agreeing that whatever Dean and Cas have, it’s something very special, and important to Supernaturals beating core.

The fact is, Dean and Cas are already being written as a romantic couple. They are being written as two people who deeply love each other, to the point that they get ridiculously overly emotional around each other and when the other hurts them. Their relationship is constantly called out by other characters (Belphegor, Rowena) and mirrored to the more overt (however unfair that is) heterosexual relationship in the show (Sam and Eileen).

If we were still living within the era of the Hays Code, if this was The Celluloid Closet, then we would already be championing Destiel as an epic example of queer romance. It IS a queer romance after all. Destiel is real, it exists within the Supernatural story, and the SPN writing team including actual queer writers are 100% on our side and writing Destiel as best they can. This I am 100% certain of at this stage. As a meta writer, I am already validated that my reading of the show and of Destiel as a queer romance in the show is correct. Destiel isn’t something anyone can justifiably call us delusional for seeing anymore. We have come way far beyond that point here. If you see Destiel as a romantic love story, your reading is a correct reading because that IS the story the writers are writing. Season 15 has confirmed that with the Destiel break up story arc and Dean’s prayer. This I say with absolute certainty. Your reading of Destiel as valid and an actual queer love story is correct. It is the story they are telling. People can’t deny Destiel anymore because it is those deniers who at this stage look pretty damn delusional ya know?

I have bolded several lines above because they are important and I really want to stress that this is my stance on the matter. Do not let anyone try to convince you that I feel differently here. If you are a young queer person who sees yourself and your relationship in the DeanCas love story you are valid in seeing that. Exactly as it is, right now, without any need for further confirmation within the story. I am in no way trying to invalidate you by what I am about to say next.

I mentioned the Hays Code and the Celluloid Closet. If you haven’t seen the Celluloid Closet I urge you to watch it as it is a fascinating look into queer coding within the Hays code era. Also, quickly, if you aren’t aware of what I mean by the Hays Code it’s basically the code that Hollywood had to adhere to, setting out rules of what could and couldn’t be portrayed in cinema at the time. Here’s a link to the Wiki article on the history of queer cinema. The introduction of the Hay’s code also meant the introduction of queer coding and subtext rather than explicit dipictions of queer romance in cinema. When I refer to this in relation to Dean and Cas, basically what Supernatural is doing with Dean and Cas is exactly what was done to dipict queer romance in order to get around the Hays code during the era when it was enforced.

So when I say that Destiel is real and valid and being written as a love story, I mean that the writers are basically doing with Destiel what savvy filmmakers had to do to circumvent the Hay’s code during Hollywoods golden age.

Do you see the issue yet?

It is 2020. The Hay’s Code has been abolished for around 50 years.

I fully respect the SPN writing team for trying to tell the Destiel love story as best they can, but at this point in time, even with everything they have already given us, it is still subtext.

Subtext IS a part of the text. What is Canon? What isn’t Canon? Honestly? I’m done with the arguments about it. Believe what each of you want to believe. What I will say is that I don’t think we are going to get anything more overt from the show at this point. The reason I say this is because the writers have now had plenty of ideal opportunities to actually bring the Destiel love story into text. They could have had a single line in 15x07 that confirmed Dean and Lee had a romantic relationship when they were younger. It would have been so easy to do. But they didn’t. Dean’s prayer to Cas, in all it’s glory, could have given us one line more as well. We could have had a love confession. They could have taken it there. Again, it would have been so easy, and it was the ideal opportune moment for Dean to confess. But they didn’t.

I have gone back and forth on this particular question over and over again. The question being will Destiel be brought into explicit undeniable text by series end?

Again, I stress, this question is completely separate to the question of the validity of Destiel already within the text and I swear to God if I get a single argumentative person in my mentions coming at me because they’ve been brainwashed by *people* trying to twist and blur these lines I am going on an even bigger blocking spree to the one I’ve already been on.

In my opinion, the answer to this question resides not with the decisions of the writers (who I fully believe would make it overtly canon in a heartbeat if they could) but with the CW execs. I have my own theories about what goes on behind the scenes, and what I think Dabb has been fighting with since he first took over as showrunner in season 11, and I just really hope that at some point once this is all over we will get a big expose on the truth about Destiel which confirms my speculation and slams the CW execs for not wanting to go there with Supernatural in particular (something I have previously talked about here). I would love for the execs to have given the green light on Destiel being overt by season end, and I am still hoping they have been more lenient this season even if the okay is only for one small moment. Whatever we get or do not get, it will be at the hands of the CW execs and not the writers. That’s the one thing I ask everyone to please keep in mind whatever happens in the end.

As far as what I think may or may not happen...

I would love for the Empty to take Cas because Dean confesses his love and kisses him. Or even if the Empty takes Cas because of other things, having Dean then rescue Cas from the Empty in a poetic reverse of Cas rescuing Dean from Hell, with the big reunion being their overt textual getting together. I feel like the story could go in so many different directions right now as I don’t actually feel like the plot of season 15 is all that coherant so far. The main key notes were Dean and Cas’s relationship drama, Sam and Eileen’s reunion, Chuck messing with the boys and Jack’s return. I think that things will ramp up pretty quickly in this final run of episodes from mid March to the finale, and I think a lot of storylines will get addressed and resolved in a short space of time, at this point, if anything overt does happen for Dean and Cas, it will happen quickly, and the story will move on, or it will be left in the subtext until the very final episode, or it will remain in subtext completely.

Personally, I think that Dean and Cas’s love story will remain subtextual until the very end, with potentially an “I love you” from Dean that will be interpreted as platonic by all major media sources much to all of our frustrations (a repeat of the Season 12 Cas “I love you”) (As Dean needs to tell Cas he loves him as a plot point at this stage, regardless of whether it is romantic or platonic the story basically demands it be said). I am still quietly confident that Dean and Cas will end the season together in some way, either living or dead, I don’t think that their story or their individual story arcs work if they are separated, and I will be stunned and hurt the same way I was for Game Of Thrones if the show does take a different route.

Therefore, since I see the show ending with Dean and Cas together, I can potentially see them taking each others hands in one final shot that basically subtly confirms that they are an item without ever actually textually stating anything more or giving us a kiss or anything. I personally, would be very satisfied with this. If it doesn’t happen though, if I’m totally honest, I would also be satisfied so long as they are still together by the shows end, as I have continually stressed, Destiel is already a real and valid love story that totally validates me as a meta writer, even if it isn’t technically “canon” by all major definitions of the term. (Again I stg if anyone comes at me for saying this I am blocking without devoting a second of my time to arguing with you I am literally at zero tolerance on this ridiculous argument right now and refuse to be dragged back into the bullshit).

Whatever happens, I am loving what we are getting so far. I’ve really been enjoying this season especially the Dean and Cas storyline because it has been so intense and emotional and I LIVE FOR IT! :D I know I’ll be a puddle of tears whatever happens and I just hope that it keeps up this excellent trajectory because so far I’ve been really pleased with everything else we’ve got even if I was slightly disappointed by the show not pushing 15x07 and 15x09 just that tiny bit further into overt canon confirmation of Bi!Dean and Destiel. We’ll see. As I have already said several times, I am feeling pretty validated by my interpretation of Dean and Cas’s relationship over the past so many years I’ve been writing about them. I am confident that I will continue to feel validated as we reach the final run of episodes, and I will continue to be optimistic that Dean and Cas will get a satisfying ending together, whether that includes overt textual Destiel confirmation or not.

#destiel #deancas #supernatural #spn meta #castiel #dean winchester #spn speculation #season 15 #destiel dreaming #spn endgame speculation #destiel endgame speculation #my meta #the great queerbating debate #queercoding #hays code #asks #anon #Anonymous

[tudorscharlot]

The Falling (Carol Morley, 2014)

This was my second viewing of this film. Right after I watched it for the first time, I read several reviews of it and they were mostly favorable, but - and this really puzzled me - none of them acknowledge the queer element to the relationship between Lydia and Abbie. A couple writers even went out of their way to assert that there was definitely nothing romantic between them. The common view seems to be that Lydia is just platonically fixated on her confident, sexually adventurous friend. Which is silly. I'm certainly not trying to force any particular subtext or theme on this work of art, but there is no way that there is not a romantic element to Lydia and Abbie’s relationship! Even though that isn't the whole deal between them by a long shot. But Lydia doesn’t want to be Abbie. She just wants Abbie.

From the way that they speak to each other, I don't think that they have a sexual relationship and I don't know that they are even at a point of explicitly naming what is between them. I know that girls are generally more comfortable being physically affection with one another than boys, so I'm not saying that their being so cuddly with each other must "mean" anything more than an expression of their friendship. But Lydia is jealous and sexually possessive of Abbie. And the way they hold hands and lie together, the way they talk about their relationship, and just the way they physically are when they are in the same place puts them in a space somewhere between two girls who are close friends and two young women who are something else, too. Lydia is very serious and reserved and Abbie is more free and impulsive. But Abbie seems to care more than she lets on and despite doing things that inflame Lydia’s jealousy. It would be wrong to say that whatever Lydia is feeling is unrequited. It's just not requited in as obvious or monogamous a way.

There is a lot going on in this film, and I don’t know if it’s completely successful in saying everything it has to say. I find the last 15 minutes a little upsetting and I'm especially not sure if I think the ending lands. But I love this movie, and I love it enough to feel like the things that feel incongruous or wrong to me right now might come to make more sense as I continue to think about it (and with another viewing).

SPOILER ALERT How about all of that falling? Abbie faints and dies - which, by the way, is horrifying. It’s a punch in the gut to lose one of our story’s heroes 30 minutes into the film, and it really caught me off-guard and upset me the first time I saw it. Gosh. So Abbie falls and is gone, and then all the other girls start fainting all the time. There's ambiguity over whether or not some medical epidemic has struck the girls, whether they are experiencing some kind of psychosomatic sympathy for their friend that feels real to them but has no physical basis, or whether they are just knowingly faking it. If they are knowingly faking it, is it in childish (by which I mean pure-hearted) solidarity or is it less noble attention-seeking behavior? Some of the girls faint in a pretty believable way and some of them are pretty theatrical about it, from the beginning and the whole time it's happening. And then of course Lydia admits she was always only faking it.

What really struck me on the second viewing is that this part of the story is simply a portrait of the reality of life for teenage girls. All of the girls are mourning a shocking death. It's shocking to lose someone in your small peer-group at that age. But against the backdrop of a private school in 1960s England, they aren't really given time or space to grieve as children. They're forced to keep putting on their long skirts and pretend that life is going on like normal. So when the opportunity arises (prompted by the socially non-compliant best friend of their dead friend) to act out (and I guess I mean that both in terms of theater acting and misbehaving) in imitation of and tribute to Abbie, they almost all take it.

They should be allowed to STOP and process what just happened, but they aren't. So they find their own way to stop and mourn and let the adults know that they are in pain and are confused and that they (the girls) are connected to one another. And I really like that we are shown that Lydia and some of the other girls are faking it while some of the girls maintain that it is real. This part of the film does such a great job of illustrating the importance of taking the feelings of children seriously, even if the feelings are not about things that you think are serious. And the importance of recognizing that sometimes young people don't have the vocabulary to articulate what's wrong. Whatever is going on with each girl individually, they all double down when the adults refuse to believe that what they are experiencing is real. Further, I love this portrait of solidarity. They all rally together rather than ostracizing Lydia or conforming to the demands of their teachers out of fear of punishment. Their instinct is to draw to one another. I love this beautiful story of girls being together with each other.

I don't really know what the fuck is up with Lydia's family and their relationships with one another. The mom is the only character who feels like a caricature, and I'm not sure how to rectify her with the rest of the film. The reveal that Lydia was conceived when the mom was raped and the mom resents her for resembling her rapist is...a lot. And the consummated sibling incest is even more a lot. Perhaps Lydia is drawn to her brother because her brother had sex with Abbie right before she died and that feels like a way for her to be close to Abbie. She is also just in a state of nihilistic despair and not thinking or acting clearly. Maybe it is appropriate to do the Midsommar thing and view this part of the film as being like a fairy tale. It certainly is horrifying if taken literally. And the final scene by the river, I’m realizing right now that this whole last act has big echoes of the last act of Bergman’s Through a Glass Darkly. And like “Papa spoke to me” in that film, this moment between Lydia and her mom under the tree feels like it doesn’t quite hit the way the author wants it to.

I guess there are three stories: Lydia and Abbie's complex relationship, the epidemic of fainting among the girls after Abbie dies, and Lydia's damaged relationship with her mother and brother. The first two stories fit together very well. The third one doesn't fit very well. Maybe they don't have all fit together to still work as a film. And maybe they'll fit together better when I watch it again. Or maybe Carol Morley just tried to put too many things in this film and fucked up her third act.

END SPOILERS

A lot of this film is perfect, though. The music in general is good, but the scene where the girls’ alternative orchestra is playing gives me chills. That piece of music and the footage of them playing and singing it is beautiful and an unexpected step into a dream. (That little wooden xylophone that Lydia plays is a delight when heard through headphones.) Obviously Florence Pugh is great in this, and it was such a treat rewatching this having seen her work in Midsommar and Little Women. But Maisie Williams is the real revelation in this film. I watched all of Game of Thrones and the main thing I took away from that series is that the true stars on there were Peter Dinklage and Maisie Williams. Williams, as a person, has such intelligence and intensity, and she plays this role in a way that I don’t think any other actor could.  Anyway, The Falling is a beautiful and puzzling film. Here’s to the next viewing.

#the falling #the falling film #carol morley #maisie williams #florence pugh #pughniverse

[laufire]

Flint

How I feel about this character: I love him, I empathize with him to uncomfortable levels, and I’m a little too invested in his happiness xD

All the people I ship romantically with this character: Miranda, Silver, Madi, Thomas, and Billy a little in a cracky way xD

My non-romantic OTP for this character: Silver though again, I ship it and I think there’s plausible subtext for a change lol.

My unpopular opinion about this character: I fear his ending will disappoint me, for various reasons: a.) THE WAR AGAINST ENGLAND, COLONIALISM AND SLAVERY; b.) Flint/Thomas just doesn’t feel right to me without Miranda; c.) certain suspicions I have about how it’s written, but that I’ll reserve my opinions on for now.

One thing I wish would happen/had happened with this character in canon: that he’d won his war xD

my het ship: Flint/Miranda, be still my heart *sniffs*.

my fem/slash ship: Flint/Silver. It’s just... so well crafted *hearteyes*.

my OTP: Flint/Madi/Miranda/Silver (+Flint/Miranda/Thomas). Why choose in this ‘verse.

my OT3: Flint/Madi/Silver.

my cross over ship: this is going to be super self-indulgent but WHATEVER. Strictly platonically (she only has eyes for Leena), I saw the similarities between him and my OC Latoya immediately (it’s not unsurprising because Latoya is my queer sci-fi pirate protagonist, but still. It’s a bit eerie), so I’m picking them.

my kink: he comes across as supremely subby with his ships and I love it xD

a head cannon fact: I just mentioned the one about Miranda and Thomas trying to get him flustered with poetry LOL. Hmm. Madi would quote literature at him too.

my gender bend: just grab a time travel machine and get young Maggie Smith, ffs. Don’t tell me they don’t look practically identical. Like mother like son etc. (I would’ve paid out of my own pocket to have her in a pirate show lmao).

#black sails #james flint #black sails thoughts #talking to the void #my thoughts #replies #thank you! #aaaaaand that's it for now #Anonymous

[ozonecologne]

I feel so guilty when I watch Dean and Cas interact because I feel as a straight woman I should'nt insist on queer reading every close male friendship. Like guys can love each other platonically and hug or whatever. I have a friend like that, she has been my support since 5th grade and now at 23 I would willingly die for her. So if I can have a relationship like that why can't Dean. But then if they are gay and I think that they are not isn't that homophobic?

Thank you for being so aware of your own conduct in fandom spaces and for thinking about these questions in a larger social context. That’s very responsible of you and it definitely makes fans of other gender and sexual orientations feel welcome.

BUT. First of all: it is not homophobic to believe that Dean and Cas aren’t gay, goodness gracious. The ship isn’t canon, and you’re allowed to have opinions! I think it’s when you start berating others about their differing opinions and insisting on your singular, exclusionary heteronormative reading that you enter homophobic territory. Does that make sense? You clearly don’t hate gay people or are against their representation in media.

Second of all: do you insist on queer reading every close male friendship? My guess is that you don’t, actually. My guess is that it’s this relationship in particular (and maybe a few choice others?) that you fixate on.

My advice to you is to stick with your actual opinion. If the only reason you feel compelled to say that Dean and Cas aren’t gay is because you don’t want to fetishize men – while I applaud you for being aware of that, there actually are numerous substantial reasons for people to believe that the relationship that Dean and Castiel have is different from other friendships depicted on the show. That’s why this ship has so many devotees: because there is some really convincing evidence for it. You don’t have to feel guilty for, like, seeing what’s there. Dean and Castiel are an exceptional pairing.

But not everybody’s experience with romantic relationships is the same, obviously. You may look at something that someone sees as a romantic gesture and believe it to be totally platonic, based on your own experience. And here’s the thing about interpreting an open text: neither one of those stances is wrong! This is Schrödinger’s Gay, as somebody once pointed out: until the series ends and we get concrete confirmation on the intended nature of Dean and Castiel’s relationship (whether they get together or not) we can argue all day about what is and isn’t “true” to their characters. Even at the end we’ll still be able to argue those positions, but it’s really only at the end that we can start to critique the writers’ execution of portraying their interaction over the years.

I do want to discourage you from believing in an interpretation of a text simply because you think it’s the Right Thing To Do. I say this as a non-man as well (albeit as a queer non-man), but while it’s always good to consider the feelings of others you can’t (and shouldn’t) ignore signs and patterns that jump out at you. We’re getting into a little bit of queerbait discourse now, but I think it’s actually more damaging and irresponsible not to point out when and where queer subtext is being exploited or misrepresented by mainstream media than it is to label platonic relationships as potentially queer. The latter opens up cultural discourse about the spectrum of emotion we are allowed to feel for other people and how that gets expressed (particularly in the context of Western toxic masculinity), which doesn’t actually hurt anybody. The former does. I’m personally pretty fed up with being “strung along” for so many years – again, this is as a queer person frustrated that our narratives do not get the justice they deserve – and it makes me resent the show. ((But Dean and Cas getting together is not the point of Supernatural anyway.))

I DIGRESS. Go with your gut. If you find yourself wondering whether your interpretation of the show text is just a projection of some bias, try arguing your position. Jot down a mini-essay! Why do I feel the way that I do about this? Is it just because I find the idea of these two men hot? What are my pieces of evidence? Do I have enough evidence to make a convincing case? If yes, you have nothing to feel guilty for! Ship on, baby!!!!

Hope all this is helpful?

#replies #anon #text #destiel #meta #? #also #while socially responsible viewing practices are of course important #like......... it's just a tv show sis #and a really shitty one at that #ship what you want #just don't be awful to other people because of your shipping you know?

[fortunatelylori]

JONSA: The infamous “undermine me” scene

About a week ago @jonsa101 posted a meta regarding the “undermine me” scene in season 7 (episode 1).

She discusses this particular exchange between Jon and Sansa:

Jon: You are my sister but I am king now.

Sansa: Will you start wearing a crown? (Sansa Snark is in the house, guys!)

Jon: When you question my decisions in front of the other lords and ladies, you undermine me.

 In the meta she identifies the “undermine me” line as a romantic trope that she’s seen play out in many different contexts. If you guys haven’t read the meta yet, please go and read it. @jonsa101 always has some very interesting interpretations and theories regarding the show and I really enjoy her meta work. 

 I was already planning on discussing this scene in detail as part of my upcoming series on all the Jonsa scenes but since she tagged me in the meta, I thought I’d discuss it now.

I have to say that after reading her post, I had a look at lists of romantic tropes as well as my favorite research source – youtube – in order to try and find similar examples of the “undermine me” line. I’m afraid I came out empty on this one.

 However, the more I thought about it, the more I realized that whether or not you identify this particular line as a trope, the whole exchange between them ticks a lot of romantic tropes off the list as I’ll show below.

 This is one of the things that always bothers me about people calling Jonsa shippers delusional. Even if Jonsa never becomes canon, it’s very much a fact that the writers are playing with romantic expectations in all of their scenes. You can’t swing a stick in the direction of these two without one trope or another hitting you smack in the face. So at the very least, Jonsa shippers are responding to these visual and storytelling devices. Hardly a delusion.

 For the interests of this meta I will focus strictly on the tropes used in this particular scene, which considering that it’s only 3 minutes long, I was shocked to find out is more than 1. For reference, I’m working off the list of romantic tropes found here as well as use the explanation they give for each of them. When you have the time, check it out. It’s like an Easter Egg Hunt for Jonsas.

 Like an Old Married Couple: These two people are very close and tend to bicker with each other.

 This is where I would actually place the “undermine me” line. In fact this is where I would put this entire exchange:

Jon: You are my sister but I am king now.

Sansa: Will you start wearing a crown?

Jon: When you question my decisions in front of the other lords and ladies, you undermine me.

Sansa: I can’t question your decisions anymore?

Jon: Of course you can but …

Sansa: Joffery never let anyone question his authority. Do you think he was a good king?

 Ahem … guys, I reeeally don’t think you’re fighting over what you think you’re fighting over. Also can you air your dirty married laundry in private? You’re making everyone uncomfortable!

 Now, Like an Old Married Couple is usually served with a generous helping of the Belligerent Sexual Tension and/or Unresolved Sexual Tension tropes on the side. Which would explain the seemingly random insert of Joffery in this whole conversation (there’s more to it than that but more on that later). I mean doesn’t every girl compare her brother to her ex-boyfriend? Isn’t that a thing that people do all the time?

 The thing that is very interesting here is the way these two are operating. There’s nothing really sibling-like about this interaction. This is two partners having a fight.

 But this is where it gets interesting. Because this exchange is followed by another trope:

 Aww, Look! They Really Do Love Each Other: No matter how much they fight, they really do care about each other very much.

Jon: You think I’m Joffery?

Sansa: You’re as far from Joffery as anyone I’ve ever met.

Jon: Thank you!

 Throughout my series on the Jon/D*ny romance (X) (X) (X) (X) (X), I kept talking about how Jon and Dany never seem to reach a consensus or resolve anything in any of their fights. Every Jonsa scene comes in direct contrast to that. It isn’t the absence of fighting that makes a couple work, it’s them being able to resolve and move on from a fight that does. And this is where this trope comes in. No matter how hard Jon and Sansa have a go at each other, you are never left in any doubt that they care about one another.

 But there’s more …

 Dismissing a Compliment: A character doesn't believe something nice their Love Interest tells them.

Sansa: You’re good at this, you know.

Jon: At what?

Sansa: At ruling.

Jon: No …

Sansa: You are. (beat) You are.

 Why don’t you say it again, Sans? I don’t think he heard you the last two times …

 Sansa: They respect you. They really do …

 Ok, ok. Sheesh! Are we also going to talk about how cute his hair looks today and how dreamy his eyes are?

 This is followed by the hyper-analyzed “but” lines:

 Sansa: … but you have to … Why are you laughing?

Jon: What did father used to say? Everything before the word but is horseshit.

 This may or may not have plot implications later on but for the purposes of what we’re analyzing here, the point I’m trying to make is that Jon is dismissing every nice thing Sansa has said about him and focuses only on the word “but”. Because he’s Jon Snow … You can’t pin a compliment on this guy to save your life.

Also …

 Laugh of Love: The tendency to laugh when in the presence of your Love Interest.

 (no idea who made this. sorry but thank you!)

As well as pretty much every other scene he has with her. Either Sansa is a proficient stand-up comedian or Jon is just really, really happy whenever he’s around her, even when he’s angry at her. Totally platonic, guys! Nothing to see here!

 Caught the Heart on His Sleeve: Ship Tease moment where one partner grabs the other partner's arm/sleeve.

(gif credit to @baelerion)

Complete with Jon looking down to see Sansa touching him either because his senses are overloaded or because he can’t feel anything through the thick sleeve of the jacket Sansa most likely made for him. Also notice that this is described as a ship tease. We’re teased all right …

 Sigh of Love: Sighing dreamily when in the presence of or thinking about your Love Interest.

And because Jon can’t let Sansa steal the spotlight on this one:

(gif credit to @baelerion​)

This is not a competition but if it were, Jon would win. Sorry, Sans! His is longer and deeper. Still love you though!

 And lastly ….

 Like Parent, Like Spouse: A character's Love Interest is similar to one of their parents, be it in looks or personality.

 In every god damn episode they have together and also here:

In conclusion, for those at home not keeping count, that’s 7 tropes used in a 3 minute scene. Is it any small wonder this might seem familiar to people? Either way you want to slice it, you have seen these visual and narrative cues in other stories. Tropes don’t become tropes because no one ever used them.

 Now I did title this meta “the infamous undermine me scene” for a reason. That’s because this scene, as almost all Jonsa scenes, has three layers that are all thrown at the audience simultaneously. Two of these layers are good, one of these layers is BAD. Let’s see if you guess which is which:

 What the characters are fighting about

 This is where the whole text vs. subtext analysis comes in. Ideally, any scene in any story you ever read or watch, should have both a surface level as well as subtext. Now and again you will get scenes, out of necessity, that are simply what they say on the tin but writers are actively dissuaded from doing this on the whole. It would be very boring and frankly poor storytelling if subtext was non-existent and people simply talked at each other, complete with an accurate, objective narrative on what they’re saying and why they’re saying it. To put it simply, it wouldn’t be a satisfying journey for the audience.

 So what is the surface level? Well, this is a direct follow-up to the preceding scene where Jon pardons Alice and Ned and Sansa argues against it. The argument got pretty heated between the two of them so now we’re given a scene where we can see the resolution of said argument.

 What you should keep in mind at this stage is how that argument ended:

Sansa: They died fighting for Ramsay. Give the castles to the families of the men who died fighting for you.

Jon: […] I will not punish a son for his father’s sins and I will not take a family home away from a family it has belonged to for centuries. That is my decision and my decision is final.

 Check-mate, as they say. Jon won that argument. He is the king and he made his decision. Case closed. On a purely surface level, that argument was finalized. We didn’t really need the “undermine me” scene unless we attempt to infer things that are no presented to us directly.

 Which brings us to …

 What the characters are really fighting about

Jon: You are my sister but I am king now.

Sansa: Will you start wearing a crown?

Jon: When you question my decisions in front of the other lords and ladies, you undermine me.

 The question here is why does Jon feel undermined? I think the answer is not because he doesn’t want Sansa questioning his decisions, as she seems to believe. Nor is it because he suspects some sort of nefarious ulterior motive (we’ll leave that for that pesky 3rd layer we’ll talk about shortly).

 We all know Jon values dialogue and collaboration. What we also know is that whatever Sansa says affects him very deeply. You can deduce this from their scenes but, for confirmation, we also have Kit saying that Sansa “twists” Jon. So we can assume that their argument hurts him in some way and even though he put his foot down during the meeting, he still feels the need to clarify the issue with her which is why they’re having the conversation.

 Now people have pointed out that, as one of his vassals, Sansa has every right to question him publicly. The problem is that’s not how Jon sees her. He very distinctly separates Sansa from the rest of his court. And since we already had the “we need to trust each other” scene at the end of season 6, I think it’s safe to assume that he sees the two of them as a unit that is supposed to be on the same page so the fact that Sansa speaks out against him in public, instead of privately, feels like a betrayal.

 There’s also his character and history to consider. Jon has never been the kind of person to take criticism very well, mostly because he’s felt unworthy and rejected all his life. And now he’s gone from the Bastard of Winterfell to King in the North in the span of a few months. That would leave just about anyone feeling uncertain of how much people truly trust their judgement.

 However, if there’s one thing you learn sooner or later, is that there are two sides to every story. That’s why it’s never a good idea to side with one party whenever couples fight.

 Because if we look at things from Sansa’s perspective, you can see how she might feel dismissed. The fact of the matter is Jon isn’t the world’s greatest communicator and failed to talk his decision over with Sansa before announcing it to the Council, which in turn makes Sansa feel sidelined, hence her aggressive snark and Joffrey digs. And we get an explanation of that here:

Sansa: He [Ned] was trying to protect us. He never wanted us to see how dirty the world really is but father couldn’t protect me and neither can you. So stop trying.

 Sansa is operating under a false assumption as well. Jon looks at their argument and feels undermined. Sansa looks at Jon avoiding her counsel and thinks that he does it because he sees her as his little sister that is in need of protection.

 Now Jon, bless his heart, does try to put Sansa in the little sister box at times but he fails at it miserably, partly because Sansa doesn’t let him and partly because what he needs from her is very far removed from what sisters usually provide.

 So there they are … two “siblings” stuck on a balcony having a lovers quarrel. Just another day at Winterfell.

 Which brings us to what I like to call …

 The “D&D screwing with us” layer

 Why do I say that the writers are screwing with us in this scene? Well, because of this:

Sansa: Joffery never let anyone question his authority. Do you think he was a good king?

 There is absolutely no reasonable explanation for why they felt the need to bring Joffery, one of the worst people this show has ever inflicted on us, in this conversation. Firstly, because there is no parallel to be drawn between Jon and Joffery in this situation. For one, if Joffrey was the king here, Alice and Ned’s heads would be decorating the walls. They would certainly not have been brought back into the fold which is what Jon has done for them. Secondly, since Jon is very much talking his head off to Sansa at the moment, it’s pretty obvious that he isn’t above explaining his reactions.

 What she says is, honestly, incredibly insulting which is why she backtracks out of it as quickly as the writers would allow:

Jon: Do you think I’m Joffrey?

Sansa: You’re as far from Joffrey as anyone I’ve ever met. (all the while looking extremely guilty)

 If the mention is here in order to clue us in on the fact that Sansa views Jon as something other than her brother, by comparing him to the only person she’s ever had romantic feelings for, there’s again no need for that. Seven romantic tropes in one 3-minute scene is more than enough to get that point across.

 So why do the writers have her say this? I would argue that this mention is in here in order to advance the “darkSansa” agenda, particularly since this is a scene where Jon says he feels undermined by her twice.

It doesn’t matter that Sansa backtracks on the Joffrey fiasco, it doesn’t matter that she tells him she doesn’t want to undermine him, while desperately sighing with loving eyes that she wants him to listen to her.  The “darkSansa” idea sticks.

 And that’s because the audience support is very much skewed  in  Jon’s favor. Being on tumblr, sometimes you forget that the Jonsa fam is very much the minority and that exclusive Sansa fans are the unicorns of this fandom (#love4unicorns). The vast majority of this audience will not look at Jon as an unreliable narrator, as every character in this show is, but as the ultimate authority on how this scene should be viewed.

 If he says he feels undermined, then it must be because he’s being undermined, which by extension means that Sansa will betray him. And her mentioning Joffery only helps to further antagonize the audience against her.

 Does that mean the Ds want us to hate Sansa for no particular reason? Not really. What they really, really want is to, yet again, beat the “Starkbowl” horse until it expires from exhaustion. And they’re willing to compromise emotional development and cut off the audience from essential POVs to achieve that.

 In season 6, when they first teased Starkbowl, they did it for emotional turmoil. They gave us that beautiful, heart breaking reunion scene only to immediately have Sansa start to be seemingly duplicitous. Because wouldn’t it be just so tragic that after Jon found new purpose in life through Sansa and she finally found safety and comfort with someone that actually cared for her, she would turn everything on its head and betray him?

 In season 7, they wanted to resurrect it because of the Littlefinger twist ending. This little “Joffrey” titbit and the “undermining” conversation helped plant the seeds for it so when Arya (another fan favorite) began accusing her of plotting against Jon, the audience would have this early scene to fall back on, despite the fact that Sansa continuously supports Jon’s policy while he’s away and constantly talks about him, to the point where she almost sounds like Sam talking about Gilly.

 What I’m trying to get at with this example is that the writers are not operating in good faith when telling this story. They will constantly throw things in to tease plot points that never come to pass. I don’t like this narrative choice at all, because it requires being cut off from certain characters POVs (Jon and Sansa are champions of this in season 7) which in turn puts distance between the audience and them, when the core of good storytelling to me is seeing characters wrestle with decisions and emotions not off-screen, but right before our eyes.

However, at the very least, what all of this should tell you, is that you should never simply relay on what the ‘explicit’ meaning of a scene is because there’s far more lurking beneath the surface. 

#jonsa #Jon x Sansa #jonsa meta #jon x sansa meta #sansa stark #jon snow #game of thrones #got7 #got meta #undermine me

[otdderamin]

Analysis: Caduceus and Caleb build their relationship – CR C2 Ep47 2:40:07

REVISED: The original article was written before Talks Machina 2019-01-15 where Taliesin clarified that Caduceus' feeling for Caleb are platonic. This article was written on that assumption anyway. It's been lightly revised to include that certainty and include the Talks Machina Transcript.

The two flattering exchanges between Caduceus and Caleb caught my ear as much as anyone. There's clearly some stronger, closer relationship forming there. Maybe it will come to something else one day, but on review, I was not reading it as romantic overtures so much as two socially awkward people trying to communicate kindness, which Taliesin confirmed on Talks Machina 2019-01-15 (0:39:18). Taliesin: "I will say he doesn't feel that way [about Caleb], though, but yeah. Yeah, he don't- he doesn't have a thing going on in that direction, but he's definitely like, 'Yeah, you're cool.'" I really like the idea of an ace/aro Caduceus who basically doesn't understand the concept of flirting. He just thinks you should be kind and supportive to all living things and ease their insecurities, but other people reserve that for ulterior motives.

Caduceus' comment that Caleb smells nice (3:23:42) came directly after Jester was projecting all her insecurities & making Cad feel insecure himself before she tried to correct (3:22:56). Caduceus could see that the joke about Caleb being stinky was really bothering & hurting Caleb in the same way. So, Caduceus was partly trying to reassure Caleb that wasn't the case and passive-aggressively put an end to the joke with the others. And doing that with his disarmingly frank honesty and supportive personality. Taliesin said on Talks, "I think that it's more the teasing that he smells bad." (0:38:03)

Caduceus is flattering to plants and animals he wants to reassure and persuade to be kind to them in exactly the same tone. And Caleb was irritated enough to be withholding magic from them until they apologized (3:23:46), so there's a similar motive here.

Also, this is Taliesin. He tried to flatter sentient grass with Percy and it came off as flirting (CRC1 Ep060 2:21:56). He's expressed before (on Gather Your Party, I think) that he sees flirting as a way of making people feel good about themselves without necessarily expecting it to be reciprocated.

Caleb offering Caduceus the book I've a harder time reading, as did Caduceus. He's clearly stumbling his way through trying to build a positive relationship of some kind. Caleb's been socially isolating himself for such a long time that any attempt to peak out of his shell is a bit startling. Caleb saw Caduceus being very kind to him when his best friend was being an asshole, and he had something he could offer in return. He was trying to practice returning kindness that wasn't so transactional, which he is very, very rusty at and unsure about.

Caleb was also unsure what value it would have to Caduceus. Caduceus is as backwoods as you can get, and clearly not that bright. Caleb was probably unsure if books were something that would ever interest him or be of any use to him. Remember that Molly was barely literate, so I can see why he wouldn't want to make assumptions. Also, this is Caleb making himself even more vulnerable by trying to share his dearest passion with someone else he feared would reject it.

There's clearly some form of attraction there from both of them, but let's look at a multi-layered attraction model view of it. It could be romantic or sexual from Caleb, but those seem to be tied up in a lot of old baggage. Taliesin explicitly said Caduceus isn't sexually or romantically attracted to Caleb (0:39:18), and Caduceus has frankly never expressed having either attraction at all.

We're clearly seeing emotional attraction, the desire to get to know someone better as a result of their personality. Both Caleb & Caduceus have been isolated and struggle expressing this in general. Caleb by withdrawing and not getting close, Caduceus by being overly friendly.

Caleb seems to have been testing intellectual attraction by offering the book. Caduceus is wise in ways Caleb is not; Caleb is smart in ways Caduceus is not. They complement each other. Intellectual attraction is the desire to explore how someone thinks and know them that way.

Caduceus obviously shows high sensual attraction to everyone. The desire to tactilely interact with people in a non-sexual way like hugging and cuddling (frankly, this is also just Taliesin). Caleb shies away from a lot of physical contact with people.

The UNC-Chapel Hill LGBT Center has a great article on multilayered attraction called "Asexuality, Attraction, and Romantic Orientation." It's linked on the Critical Role Campaign 2 Index, but Tumblr punishes external links. It's something developed in ace/aro discourse that applies to everyone and everyone should be aware of to better understand themselves and others. People can be attracted to certain genders more than others in any of these ways, and they might not line up. Gay ace and aro people exist and are just as valid, even if there's strict limits on the sort of relationship or physicality they want.

In examining character interrelationships, I think it's important to examine the context they've already given for their preferences. I've written an analysis of Caduceus already. He not only expressed no interest (or experience) in sex, he's tried to firmly avoid the subject every time it comes up and seems completely mystified that anyone thinks he should engage that way. Even in this conversation with Jester, he's lost for how to respond when she asks, "So, like, if you think something dirty, [Melora] knows?" (3:22:56)

Given that he's been clear, be it celibacy or asexuality, it makes me extremely uncomfortable when other people decide he should want sex (even as a joke) because that's a microaggression against ace and celibate people that happens CONSTANTLY. It's rape culture and gross.

Caduceus has also not particularly expressed any romantic attraction to anyone past or present, and he doesn't feel that way for Caleb. He was perfectly content on his own. He seems to just want friends. He hasn't expressed being against the idea, so this is uncertain.

Caleb, I don't have a clear read on, but he shows many signs of feeling too damaged for relationships at the moment. He has his hands full with friendships he's still scared of. It's possible he doesn't know what he's feeling at this point.

So, this is not to step on anyone's ship, but there are other equally interesting motivations & desires that could be at play here, which frankly line up with more evidence, & which have MUCH less representation. It'd be nice to not see those possibilities drowned out, especially given that we have a canonical answer.

The character growth here is significant, whatever the subtext. Caduceus reached out to comfort Caleb when everyone else was giving him a hard time. Caleb reached out as the very first person to offer Caduceus help on the quest he left home for. No one else has cared.

Some stronger bond was formed here between them. Some greater trust. Caduceus is getting through like Beau has, and it's built on a base of greater comfort, healing, and respect for goals. However it plays out will be fascinating.

3:38:57 Caleb: "I'm glad you are traveling with us." Caduceus: "Me too, I'm... I've never felt so helpful." It's brief, but Caleb actually warmly smiles.

Transcripts

Scenes run:

1. CR C2 Ep47 Jester asks what Melora knows, Caleb smells nice:  3:22:50 to 3:24:16

2. CR C2 Ep47 Caleb gives Caduceus to book: 3:38:12 to 3:39:09

3. TM 2019-01-15 How Caleb smells to Caduceus and attraction: 0:38:09 to 0:39:57

1. CR C2 Ep47 Jester asks what Melora knows, Caleb smells nice

3:22:50 Jester to Caduceus: "Do you think the Wildmother can hear your thoughts?"

Caduceus: "Well, I know the Wildmother can- knows everything."

3:22:56 Jester: "So, like, if you think something dirty, she knows?"

GIF: Caduceus looks confused.

Jester: "What if, like, you're thinking like, 'Oh mom, I've really got to poop?'"

Caduceus: "That's- I don't- I mean… Sure?"

Jester: "What if you're thinking, 'Oh man, you know, I think I smell a little bit today,"

Caduceus: "I've never really thought that."

Jester: "but what-I've got a booger in my nose…"

Caduceus, more anxiously: "Now I'm thinking about that. Oh man, I've got a booger in my nose." He curls in to one side rubbing the side of his nose."

Jester: "What if you think like, 'Ah, does my breath smell bad?' Do you think she thinks-"

Caduceus, alarmed: "No, does it?"

Jester: "Do you think- No, your breath smells fine, but I'm just won-"

Caduceus: "You're sure?"

Jester: "No, you smell pretty good."

Caduceus: "Oh, that's nice." He rubs the bridge of his nose again. "Ah, think about this."

3:23:31 Nott: "Speaking of stinky, Caleb, what'd we get? What's our stuff?"

3:23:37 Caleb, incredulous and perplexed: "I have been in the ocean for days, and days, and days, and days."

Travis: "He's the most sterile he's ever been."

3:23:42 Caduceus: "I think he smells great."

Jester, excitedly: "What did we get; what did we get; what did we get!"

3:23:46 Caleb: "Well, first I want you to admit that I have been washed from top to bottom for a month."

3:23:51 Caduceus, firmly: "I think you smell fantastic."

Jester: "Yeah, if anything you smell briny now."

Caleb, pointedly to Caduceus: "Well you're- You are a nice fellow."

3:23:57 Caduceus: "Thank you. But no, really, I do actually think you smell very nice."

3:24:03 Caleb, satisfied: "You see?"

Jester: "Yeah. I didn't say you were stinky. Nott said you were stinky, Caleb. I think you smell like salt and fresh air."

Nott: "Like a douche."

Caleb: "Revved up."

3:24:16

2. CR C2 Ep47 Caleb gives Caduceus to book

3:38:12 Taliesin: "I'm going to gather some of my stuff and go to the crow's nest."

Matt: "Okay."

Taliesin: "Big everybody good-"

Caleb: "Oh, uh…"

Caduceus: "Yeah?"

Caleb: "You're going up?"

Caduceus: "Yeah."

3:38:21 Caleb: "Do you like a good book?"

3:38:23 Caduceus: "I- I'm not going to be reading up there, but…"

3:38:25 Caleb: "I don't mean for tonight, in general."

3:38:27 Caduceus: "I- I'll admit I'm not the best reader, but… I've read a couple books."

3:38:33 Caleb: "But you have? Um… One of the books that we found in that… ball-o-fun is about the corruption of plants."

3:38:45 Caduceus: "I would be curious."

3:38:47 Caleb: "I thought you might be."

3:38:49 Caduceus: "I'll… If you could leave it in my- my quarters, that would be most agreeable."

3:38:54 Caleb: "Surely."

3:38:56 Caduceus: "Thank you."

3:38:57 Caleb: "Mmhm. I'm glad you are traveling with us."

3:39:00 Caduceus: "Me too. I'm uh… I've uh… never felt so helpful." He gives a half bow.

3:39:09

3. TM 2019-01-15 How Caleb smells to Caduceus and attraction

0:38:09 Brian: "[@asahi_azumane] Caduceus has mentioned in a couple of episodes that he likes how Caleb smells, is this just to refute the teasing from the others or does he find something comforting in Caleb's smell like Nila […] with her smell bag?"

0:38:36 Taliesin: "I'll actually, I've often just assumed that Caleb smells a little bit like peat moss."

Brian: "Oh, really?"

Taliesin: "Or just peaty and dirty…"

Travis: "Oh! Not manure, or fertilizer but…"

Taliesin: "Not manure…"

Brian: "No no, Pete Moss, the tennis player."

Taliesin: "but like peat moss, earthy. Just from, from… Yeah, Pete Moss."

Travis: "Yean he has the soil in his hands, and…"

0:38:03 Taliesin: "Yeah, well, 'cause he's got a pocket full of weird things that he uses and they're all kind of like interest- I don't- I think that it's more the teasing that he smells bad, I don't think he actually does."

Travis: "It's not a sandalwood fragrance?"

0:39:03 Taliesin: "I wish. That would be amazing! But, like, I actually think it's legitimately from a, 'No, I think he smells pretty good. I dunno.'"

Travis: "Yeah, earthy fellow. Alright."

Dani: "I appreciate Liam hitting his breaking point with that last episode, and be like, 'You HAVE to admit that I smell fine now!'"

0:39:18 Taliesin: "Yeah, no and, like, I think Clay is always… And it's not like a sexy thing, like, 'Woo, hey!' But like, you know, 'No, you smell great.'"

Travis: "You can compliment I fellow on his…"

0:39:27 Taliesin, firmly: "I will say he doesn't feel that way, though, but yeah. Yeah, he don't- he doesn't have a thing going on in that direction, but he's definitely like, 'Yeah, you're cool.'"

Travis: "Try telling Tumblr that."

Taliesin: "Tumblr is welcome to their own opinion, and I'm not going to disagree with them."

Travis: "Boy, I tell you."

Taliesin: "I am not going to stop anybody from having a good time with their…"

Dani: "Everyone can ship whatever they want to ship."

Taliesin: "Yep. Nope."

Brian: "Except female presenting nipples."

Dani: "Yep. No, Tumblr has a really bad problem…"

Travis: "Or lithium batteries. Most couriers have a problem with."

Brian: "They cracked down on that."

0:39:57

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#critical role meta #critical role analysis #Caduceus Clay #Caleb Widogast #Talks Machina #critical role #Talks Machina Transcript #Critical Role Transcript #analysis

[kekeslider]

im gonna rant about a//urance + k/ancers under the cut so just ignore me if youre not into that

i dont get how people keep saying they NEVER saw a//urance coming, and the show didnt do a good enough job building up to it, when since like season 3 k/ancers have spent half their time trying to prove a//urance wasnt endgame. no one did that with p/ance or h@nce because those werent canon threats. a//urance ALWAYS has been and k/ancers have been knowing that but after s7 proved them wrong they decide to turn around and say a//urance has no build up. and its so obnoxious looking back at how much people have changed their view of it over the past 2 years

s1-2 no one was worried about a//urance for a number of reasons. the fandom generally thought a//ura was older and probably going to end up with sh!ro (sidenote that bc of the way s1-2 characters were moved around from their 80s counterparts, v/d sha//ura was basically the same pairing as 80s ka//ura + whatever sven + rome//e’s ship name is, bc conceptually v/d a//ura combined 80s a//ura and rome//e- peaceful/diplomatic princess [a//ura] and also warrior princess [rome//e].and v/d sh!ro was given 80s ke!ths position and characterization). sha//ura was everyone’s assumed endgame, the obvious one, while they thought k/ance would be the surprise slowburn endgame. add in that a//urance looked like a finn/bubblegum kind of thing, younger boy with a big obvious crush on disinterested older girl, and that lance and ke!th had a lot of focus in s1. back then, i can understand why no one saw a//urance coming. but looking back, it looks just like kat@@ng, so maybe we should have known.

once s3 hit, after everyone found out a//ura was a teen and therefore sha//ura was super unlikely, people started being afraid of both a//urance and ka//ura, but mostly a//urance bc the fandom went hard against ka//ura based on s2 (and other nonsense i wont get into rn). this is when you start getting metas about why a//urance would be a terrible endgame, why k/ance has more going for it. people say lance was too rude and creepy towards her in s1-2 so it sends a bad message, they say a//ura isnt reciprocating. every moment between them is CLEARLY platonic, 100000 word essay about why every a//urance interaction leads to k/ance. but its ok bc even tho s3 had a//urance moments, it still had loads of k/ance interaction [everyone collectively forgot about every ke!th and a//ura interaction including myself].

then in s4 ke!th leaves. lance and ke!th barely interact, but we see a couple good a//urance interactions. from s4 on we start seeing a//urance scenes that resemble k/ance scenes-which ill get to later. the bit on naxzela kinda looks like the bonding moment- “are you okay?” but otherwise s4 doesnt have a whole lot. but s5 gives us more a//urance while ke!th is straight up gone and does not talk to the team at all, which further lessens the perceived ka//ura threat. lance and a//ura have the sword scene, mutual support, lance takes a//uras side on the lot*r problem. but s5 gave people hope for a lance arc related to the clone, which would have to involve ke!th as well, 1+1= k/ance.

then s6 is a big turn around. it starts with a//urance looking dead and buried, despite some positive a//urance moments, bc of lot*ra, and ends with yet another supportive and emotional a//urance scene. meanwhile there’s not really 1 good k/ance moment unless you go BEYOND subtext when looking at their interactions. and with no lot*r, a//urance is once again a possibility. BUT people held on so tight to the rebound argument, and a LM interview, that they STILL refused to see the a//urance build up. that’s why s7 fucked everyone up so much. literally willful blindness and people trying to meta their way out of a//urance build up, until the blushing happened and it was SO in your face you couldnt deny it.

thats the part that irks me. it’s not that a//urance had no build up, its that the entire fandom purposefully refused to see it and would write metas about how lances feelings for a//ura were still about ke!th. there WAS build up, and it was consistent, and it makes sense. if you think the s1-3 k/ance friendship building was good romantic development, you have to acknowledge that the s3-7 a//urance friendship building was too.

and look, i get it. everyone has been clinging to k/ance since before a//urance even looked possible bc v/d has shitty inconsistent writing. you dont have to like a//urance, god knows i have nitpicky things with it, but saying it has no buildup is flat out lying. you can be mad that a//urance and k/ance have similar scenes while only a//urance is romantic. you can be mad about k/ance baiting in the marketing (which isnt done by the writers or showrunners and therefore isnt their fault). you can like k/ance better for whatever your reasons are, ive never been discrete about it being my preferred ship, but taking that out on the ship itself is rude to people who DO like the ship, because it has development and is probably canon, and is also just stupid. its willful ignorance.

i have issues with the way certain a//urance things are framed, but that goes down to the v/d writers being shit at their jobs, and if you have half a brain you could tell that the same problems would plague k/ance if thats what they had written. a//urance isnt any better or worse than the rest of vo/tron. the whole show is shit and it drags what would have been good pairings down with it. i’m probably forgetting important things in this rant but im so tired. and annoyed. and i wish k/ancers had never created this weird subculture, as much as i enjoy the endless content, because it went to a very weird place. i think 90% of k/ancers ended up being part of it or bought into it just bc mob mentality and s7 was the breaking point. just open your eyes and see what is literally Right There. keep loving or shipping k/ance but stop lying about why

#text post #keke bitches #rant #fair warning: this is long and im annoying #best to just not read it at all #ok to rb if you want to but idk why you would #******* #voltron

[sherlockedfanshani]

Johnlock: Two years on

I posted the following on a Sherlock fan forum in August 2016. I’ve just found it again and revisited it. It thought it might be interesting to reflect on how things have panned out in the Sherlock fandom: 

OK if you can bear with me, this is a long one! I wanted to set down some thoughts on this whole situation, which - frankly - I think has become a bit of a mess. Whether it can be resolved to everyone’s satisfaction at this stage I think is unlikely, but who knows?! As far as I can see it, there are two entrenched sides now: TJLC shippers on one, TPTB on the other, and other fans - both non-Johnlockers and Johnlockers who don’t want or don’t expect their ship to become canon - caught somewhere in the middle. This is just my personal interpretation. I realise others will see things very differently so please accept that my intention is only to try and set things out in a non-inflammatory way. I will set my cards on the table from the start. I don’t think it is or has ever been Steven Moffat & Mark Gatiss’ intention for Sherlock and John to enter into a romantic or a sexual relationship in their version of this story. I take at face value what they have said about addressing the fact that, in the 21st century, two close male friends living together would make some people question whether their relationship was more than platonic. And that, combined with the fact that both Moffat & Gatiss’ careers began in comedy and sitcoms, the way they have explored this in ‘Sherlock’ has mostly been through humour. That humour, incidentally, is never at the expense of gay people or gay relationships. If anything it’s a gentle mockery of any characters (Mrs Hudson, Angelo, the innkeepers in THOB) who make erroneous assumptions. In fact, humour is derived from the notion that homosexuality is so unremarkable these days. Therefore characters automatically jump to the conclusion that what Sherlock and John are gay, simply because such a close male friendship is more unusual! Do I think the “gay jokes” are always successful? Not entirely. Even Gatiss is on record as having said maybe they overdid them. However, I don’t think for a moment that they ever expected any section of their audience to interpret these occasional moments in each episode as hints or subtext that Sherlock and John would actually get together as a couple. So what happened way back in 2010? The show airs and becomes a bigger hit than Moffat & Gatiss could ever have imagined. At some stage it becomes clear to them that the show is attracting a very devoted collection of predominantly young and predominantly female fans. And via social media interaction, the creators become aware that for this fanbase, the largest part of the appeal of the show is the relationship between John and Sherlock. I’ve no idea if they’d heard of slash fiction and shipping before it became such a phenomenon in the Sherlock fandom, but presumably they became aware pretty rapidly. In the early days, the cast and crew responded in different ways whenever the fourth wall was broken and they were confronted with the Johnlock-related stories, photo manips and artwork that the fandom was producing. Initially they seemed amused and even played along. However, their responses to some of the more explicit, NSFW stuff that was shoved in their faces - either by fans or by journalists such as Caitlin Moran or Graham Norton - was less genial, and you got the definite sense that they weren’t entirely comfortable. The image of these fans that was being presented then was that they were hysterical, teenage, heterosexual girls: unable or unwilling to have physical, real-world relationships of their own, and fantasising about two men getting together for their titillation in much the same cliched way that straight men fantasise over lesbians. (Note: I’m not saying this was the reality - just the perception which was promoted all the time and which presumably TPTB also inherited.) So their responses began to shift. The creators have always said that fans are absolutely at liberty to write or create whatever they like. To my knowledge they have stood by that. No legal action of any kind has ever been threatened against any of the Sherlock fanbase for anything they have written, drawn or photoshopped. They have even expressed admiration for some of the artwork. However, they definitely took a step back and cooled on this stuff. Over time, both Gatiss and Moffat’s attitude towards and relationship with online fanbases has definitely suffered. They are fans themselves as they frequently remind us. Massive fans. And although there was no ‘Sherlock’ when they were younger and growing up, there was of course the other big TV show that has shaped their careers: ‘Doctor Who’. Remember, they are from a different generation. When they were kids, teenagers, even young men, the fan experience was totally different and almost entirely passive. You couldn’t post your opinions on a massive global forum, there was practically no way to contact other fans outside your immediate geographic locality, and there was no way of contacting the people who made the series, or at least certainly no way of guaranteeing they could see what you wrote or elicit a reply from them. Maybe this means that they haven’t adapted to the way modern fandom works. Maybe it means that as middle-aged men, they expect their fanbases to be more respectful and more passive, and ultimately to accept what they are given or, alternatively, exercise the only other option: stop watching and walk away. So what do they experience in this brave new world? Steven Moffat takes over the show-running job on ‘Doctor Who’, and has a colossal amount of vitriol flung at him by its fanbase. So much so that he decides to quit twitter altogether. He’s also routinely accused of misogyny, to the point where he is forced to give interviews rebutting the notion. I’m not going to get into whether or not the claims have any validity, I’m just trying to make the case for why he he may appear prickly or thin-skinned when it comes to criticism in general. Fan interaction also complicates matters just because the vocabulary that fans use is different. Young fans tweet “u lil shit” to Mark Gatiss in the way they would to their friends, and this is unsurprisingly not interpreted in the way it is intended. Offence is caused, people are blocked, and more barriers are erected between TPTB and the people who love and are inspired by their work. At some point, attitudes within fandom began to shift. Rather than just shipping two characters whose relationship nobody ever believed would become canon, many of the online/tumblr fanbase began to believe that Johnlock could and should do so. The notion took hold that if Gatiss were solely in charge of the show, this would indeed happen, and it was only Moffat - the nasty heterosexual - who was getting in the way. Gatiss was tweeted countless times to this effect. Only recently, someone on tumblr discovered an old League of Gentlemen sketch where Gatiss plays a gay character whose relationship (and its subsequent break-up) is fetishised and patronised by an overbearing straight woman called Tish. Whilst this sketch is problematic and can certainly be viewed as being misogynistic on some level, I don’t think it’s stretching credulity to speculate that ‘Tish’ is probably based on a real-life person and that Gatiss was indulging in some therapy by yelling at her on stage night after night. Did Gatiss connect this person with the Johnlock shippers? Did it seem to him that he was now having his professional career diminished by a bunch of pubescent teenage girls with a crush on Benedict Cumberbatch who counted him amongst their number “shipping Johnlock”? It also presumptuously placed him in the position of junior partner to his straight colleague Moffat, banning him from writing what he really wants. Another patronising assumption. This is total speculation, but I wonder if John’s vehement “I am NOT GAY!” to Mrs Hudson in the Gatiss-penned “The Empty Hearse” was provoked by all the online speculation directed at Gatiss via his twitter feed. Was this intended as the ultimate response - to shut down the Johnlock debate once and for all? Ironically, of course, it had the opposite effect. It was interpreted that Mrs Hudson was the ultimate Johnlock shipper, and she of course could see the fact staring in her face that John and Sherlock were simply made for each other! Then we come to Mumbai in 2014. And Gatiss - in a departure from the creators’ habitually evasive and jokey means of answering questions about forthcoming plot points - embarks on a lengthy and heartfelt explanation/justification when he is questioned about Johnlock. I’ve watched this video more than once and I can’t interpret his speech as anything other than sincere. And this is also why I think Gatiss and Moffat’s reactions to whenever Johnlock is raised are becoming more irritable, more frustrated and with none of the playfulness they exhibit everywhere else. Gatiss must be aware of the accusations of “queerbaiting”. They have appeared on his twitter feed, apart from anything else. And just as Moffat feels hypersensitive to accusations of misogyny, Gatiss must surely feel the same way about being accused of effectively betraying his community and having internalised homophobia. He tries to set the record state but what happens? He still isn’t believed. Of course, a big part of this is a problem entirely of Moffat and Gatiss’ making. When you spend the bulk of interviews smugly declaring that you lie to protect future plot points, you can’t then be surprised when your fans don’t then believe you about other things: no matter how impassioned or frustrated you might sound. They really have made a rod for their own backs. The With An Accent journalist detected a difference in tone and attitude to the Johnlock denials compared to other obfuscations about plot, but if you’re not in the room, AND it’s not something you want to hear, why would you believe them? Johnlockers have varying degrees of expectation of their ship becoming canon, ranging from those who want it to remain strictly in their own heads and never be actualised on the show, via those who think it would be nice but is unlikely, through to those who desperately want it to be but remain unsure. And then we have TJLC. TJLC is a conspiracy in the truest sense of the word. Every piece of data is viewed through the prism of an utter conviction that not only should Johnlock happen, it will. Costume choices, set designs, drinks, lighting, everything is presented as evidence of confirmation of Johnlock, and some of it in the most convoluted way, with no acknowledgment that there could be any other possible interpretation for what appears on screen. A coincidentally commissioned survey into LGB representation is cited as conclusive proof, as well as a quote from Gatiss from an interview years ago that the way to introduce more LGBT representation is “softly, softly”, so as not to frighten the horses, so that everyone just sees it as mundane, everyday and normal. Ironically, if the conspiracy is true, and Johnlock is ultimately going to be the ‘big reveal’, that would be precisely the opposite approach to what Gatiss describes. It would make gay representation into a sensational shock twist, just like Mary’s reveal as the assassin or Jim from IT being Moriarty. That’s not treating LGBT issues with the respect they deserve in my eyes, and maybe that’s what Moffat is getting at when he describes that approach as ‘trivialising’. The TJLCers express the certainty that such a shock reveal would shake the foundations of society to its core, and it would be such a landmark, water cooler moment, that TV and gay representation, and indeed society itself, would never be the same again. Even if I remotely believed Johnlock were on the cards, I actually think the reverse would happen. The show would be universally derided as having ‘jumped the shark’. Not because its viewers are homophobic or resistant to the idea of gay couples, just because it would genuinely come out of nowhere for them. It would be perceived as pandering to a tiny minority of its fanbase - that is for those few of the general audience who are even aware that this is what some of the fans expect from the show. And for the vast majority of the audience it would come completely out of the blue and be utterly confusing. After all, in their eyes, at no point in the show, have John or Sherlock ever exhibited any kind of sexual attraction to another man. And this is another problem, and I’m sad to say, feeds into the sense of entitlement which some fans do exhibit. ‘Sherlock’ is a massive, mainstream, worldwide hit show. It is very easy to forget that in the little bubble of tumblr where you’re speaking to a self-selected group of people who all feel the same way and all agree with you. But the online fanbase is a tiny minority of the people who watch the show. Threats to ‘desert it’ and expect that to hold any weight with the creators really are meaningless. It’s not a niche, cult show where a fan can expect to stamp her feet and automatically get her wish. To put it bluntly, when your worldwide viewership is in the hundreds of millions, if a few thousand storm off because their ship is not actualised, it really makes no difference. What really makes me sad is that I can’t see any way that this is not going to end horribly for some people. I don’t think Gatiss and Moffat realise that - whatever it may have been to begin with - the fanbase now, or at least the ultra-ardent TJLC part of the fanbase, contains a number of young people who identify as LGBTQIA. For these young people - again predominantly women but also with a number of trans, non-binary and gender queer members - they feel their sexuality, their gender and indeed their whole identity has been helped and in some cases shaped by ‘Sherlock’: specifically by their conviction that Johnlock will be realised in the show. Watching the youtube video TJLCExplained Episode 25 “Why it matters” gives a glimpse into the passion and the desperate certainty these people have. It grieves me to see these bright, passionate, articulate and intelligent young people ploughing their energies into this conspiracy. They’re politically aware: educated in and fired up by gender politics and sexual awareness. So why waste all that energy and passion on two white, middle-class, middle-aged fictional men who - if the conspiracy is correct - are so far into the closet they have been unable to express their true feelings emotionally or sexually for many years to the one person they have shared a home with in all that time? I wish Gatiss and Moffat could see these inspired yet vulnerable people. I wonder what they would think. Would they be gratified that their show has had such a profound and positive effect on their fans? Or would they be sad or bewildered that these young people’s convictions have foundations built on sand? I’m not sure how or when it will end. Of the TJLCers who were fully signed up theorists before last week’s interview dropped, I have observed a couple of reactions. A few of them seem to have now been convinced that it isn’t going to happen and have already expressed disappointment and anger that they were duped or queerbaited. Presumably if they do feel so betrayed, this marks the end of their relationship with the show. However, most of the fan responses I have seen on tumblr have assimilated the new data as ‘yet more lies’ and rejected it, along with anything else that does not fit the conspiracy, whilst at the same time reserving some anger at the way Moffat and Gatiss spoke in order to protect their great ‘lie’. So what happens in five months’ time when Series 4 airs and - as I fully expect - Johnlock doesn’t happen? Will there be an explosion of rage and bitterness which will make last week’s little flare-up look minor in comparison? Or will the conspiracy continue on the basis that Series 5 is the ultimate destination? Or the special after that? Or the one after that? Until sufficient time elapses and everyone moves on? Only time will tell. It just makes me sad that fandom - which should be a positive, happy place - and which, when everything works, means friendships are made and creativity flourishes - can and has become such a toxic environment for both fans and creators. I’m sorry this has been so long and I apologise if I have offended anyone with either what I said or the way I said it. I guess I wanted to lay out my position - to clarify it in my own mind if nothing else!  

#tjlc #sherlock #Mofftiss #steven moffat #mark gatiss #tjlc explained #queerbaiting #johnlock

[kitsoa]

Lyric Comic Q&A

So it turns out when you work on a project for half a year, you get a lot of Thoughts and want to express them whether people are actually curious or not. Without further ado, your un-requested Birdmen Lyric Comic Q&A

(Warning: I’m long winded)

*Why a Lyric Comic?

Dude, lyric comics are cool. I’ve always been fascinated by the beautiful, multifaceted artistic experience they provide, because of my love for music and art. Furthermore, I am often plagued by cinematic trapped in my head, spurred by the movement and lyrics of my favorite songs. Since I have no means or experience in the animation category (which would free these phantoms from my head) the lyric comic was a godsend of a medium for this inspired idea of mine. Kiki-kit of the Gravity Falls fandom and Tides-miraculous’ lyric comic in the Miraculous Ladybug are my main inspirations, I’ve adored their sense of motion and emotional savviness. It’s quite the powerful medium.

It’s also a good medium for me personally. I am a ‘looper’ with my music, allowing me to listen to something over and over without tiring. This is useful in the drafting stages! I loved the challenge (though I definitely didn’t anticipate it’d take this long).

*Why this song?

“Out of Mind” was one of those songs that spoke to me, in an overly cathartic, heart-yearning-- almost funnily sardonic ways. Birdmen being on the brain, I started to easily see how much the singers voice reflected that bombastic frustration our Eishi is so known for. The Pre-Chorus “Are you kidding me?” speaks to me the most, reminding me of his cry of frustration during his first blackout, screaming against his fate as he fell from the sky (this exact image did not make the final cut in the end, but I certainly vied for it until other themes overtook it-- let’s face it, there are many screaming Eishi’s to choose from).

This period of time between Takayama’s disappearance and the inevitable reunion is super intriguing to me. Eishi’s in the role of the heartbroken singer, hopelessly betrayed and unable to get over the good thing they had.

*Breakdown the story:

The progression goes like this:

Eishi’s loneliness consumes the first verse, Takayama’s empty seat, Eishi standing alone… all the while peppered with Takayama’s broken promise, which culminates with Eishi’s defiant Death Tweet. The Refrain then serves as these hallmark moments that define them. This is what they had. Every rescue, every proclamation or venomous defying of fate-- it’s what made them. And you’d have to be out of your mind to think that these moments could be forgotten.

Verse 2 is all about that shift in Eishi to follow him. Wistful memories drive Eishi as he chooses to leave and depart from everything he knows, just to get him back. Meanwhile, that opinion of Takayama is still weighed down by that grating irritation (like hell he’s in touch reality, how could he do this?) culminating to his call for him in the Himalayas. The Refrain fires again with the same point as the last but this time I tried to go for a more fervent angle, some of the scenes actually focus on Takayama’s feelings for Eishi and ultimately the pull they have towards each other.

The Bridge is where things get desperate. The moments in the manga where Eishi is in physical pain because of the Whiteout shake me so much. It reminds me of a straight up panic attack. I let this crescendo with the music, making the black void swallow the chaos in a quick snap. Building to the final chorus.

The whiteout is special because Eishi both yearns after this figment emotionally (his friendship with Takayama) and intellectually (what the hell is it and what does it mean?). It represents his unique position in the realm of the story being able to see it, but it ultimately captures the almost divine force behind the relationship of Eishi and Takayama. The outro then brings us back to Eishi failed call at the Himalaya’s, the whiteout ripping him up and forcing Takayama to save him. All the while calling back to that first interaction between them. A mysterious moment that obviously held more weight than any world shaking rescue. And I cap it off with a warmer depiction of their reunion.

*Are you shipping in this comic?

Despite the romantic song, my affections for the pairing, and any other subtext I’ve provided, I went in with the project with a platonic angle. Like I’m not lying. I’m on the ace spectrum or whatever so I kind of interpret every strong bond in the same realm. So that means, if you think it’s a romantic interpretation-- then you’re right. If you think it’s not, you’re also right. Love comes in many forms. Have fun kids.

*What was your process?

Storyboarding

Listen over and over and figure out where to phrase the panels. I then divided the lyrics up accordingly in a draft and reviewed the pacing over and over again. Does it flow? How many words would comfortably fit with each panel?

Determined the thematic arc. At this point I already had a few anchoring moments so I wrote a description of the panel in the draft. I went with the formula of Verses= move the ideas, Refrain= emotional accents, and the Bridge is like… the climax with an epilogue of an outro. This was tricky step. I debated a lot of ideas and some lyrics didn’t feel like a good fit until I really sat on it for a while.

Fill in the draft. This is where I sketch the general shape of panels. This is also where I look at the gestalt of the thing and make sure the composition is easy on the eyes. I tried to make it dynamic and zig-zaggy so as not to be boring. This is the step where one gets really excited about the project. Cause it’s no longer trapped in your head.

Sketching

Gathered references. Surfed the web, made some myself.

Made time to sketch, I did a lot of them at my summer job, made sure to draw about 2 or 3 a day. I had the time then because it was before I took on my day job. I was very surprised to find that I rarely went back to edit a picture or dispose of a draft. I went through with the mantra that I was going to finish the picture no matter what.

Stayed disciplined with said time. I would not let myself take a break from drawing because half the success came from the fact that I was on a roll.

When I finished them I then went through the process of scanning them (my scanner broke between the first 20 panels so RIP)

Coloring Stage

...Good lord. This is where I probably went the most wrong. Make sure you have a good process in place before starting out this stage.  I was not one to digital art much as of late so my familiarity with my program was lackluster (and it also is literally the worst program  in the world), and my laptop couldn’t handle more than 10 panels. So hurray for a very desperate fix. I did everything from my brothers computer, in his room. Sometimes at terrible hours because that's the only time I’m home.

Color planning. I rushed this process but I pulled up the textures and color pallets and reference images from internet searches and stock piled them. While planning I approximated the overall ‘tone’ of each pane; (is it a dark shade, a light shade, blue, or red in hue…) and then I adjusted that so the colors didn’t repeat or blend unless the panels where connected in the same scene. There was a lot of problem solving in the actual coloring so some of this was not as smooth and I paid for it later.

Sketch Editing. I was able to go back in, move around things and edit certain aspects of the sketch without compromising the entire work. This was a life saver.

Actually coloring. Because I color sketches it’s actually a painstaking process where I can’t use a wand or a fill. I’m not familiar with certain masking and coloring methods that would have sped the process up and I wanted to be consistent. This would take 3 to 5 hours a panel which I would do in small bursts.

Type-setting

Deciding font. I was hunting around for a good font for ages until I just decided… to use my own handwriting. This meant that I had to makes sure my tablet pressure specs were up to date and I had to practice my style. It’s not perfect but its cool.

Apply font to panel. There were moments when I literally said ‘screw it’ and left my handwriting a little more sloppy than standard.

Consultation. I worked with my graphic designer friend on improving the placement of text and the color choices. This was an interesting step she is a saint.

Finalize

Every single panel is extremely large. I had to resize each one. Before this I had many tests in the drafts to see how certain sizes would load or format.

*Will you make another?

Probably. Like, there is nothing more satisfying than getting something stuck in your head out of it. I have a lot of tunes I am fond of but barely any qualify for lyric comics (need to have a good pace, easy to latch on musical phrases, thematic content that works etc.) The fandom is important too. Now that I think about it I have storyboards for an old DCMK ‘lyric comic’ idea to Imogen Heap’s “A-ha” (it was like some hidden dark side!au shit I still come back to it). I can’t let my interest wan or it straight up dies. Birdmen is a really unique series for me because its held on for a remarkable amount of time and strongly at that.

Fun Facts:

I colored a total 77 panels, 11 of which were scraped versions of the core 66 because perfectionist tendencies.

It took me 3 months to sketch all the panels out, sometimes drawing 3 a day. I would often cradle my sleeping kitten while I drew.

Panel 54-- the final chorus, whiteout splash page-- took three days to draw. At first it was two pages taped together, then it was three. I had my friend mend the images together into a massive pic for me to color, then break it apart for blog distribution. The full version is used in her video edit of the lyric comic.

I didn’t use pressure sensitivity on my tablet until I got to the last chunk. RIP

It usually took me over a day to do one picture.

I do not have a computer in my room that utilizes the art program I need. I literally did every panel after #10 in my brothers room. Sometimes hella late at night too. Props to my generous brother, he tells me he likes the company.

I took a few notable breaks. All of Inktober was used on the art challenge. The weeks leading up to Birdmen Week. And at least half of the Christmas season was spent on coloring hiatus.

I like adding a ring around the pupils of the seraph eyes. This is not canon, but an error that I really liked. You can see it as a sort of glow.

I am having my friend edit the panels into a video for your convenience. I have no idea how long it will take but I’m tired.

#lyric comic project

[thefuuriofsuuri-blog]

Ivy - a Casey/Donatello (2012) story

Requested by @tur-nerd-tle-girl

1275 words

Genre: Songfic, Romance

Rated T for kissing, alcohol, and the steamy, sultry music of Frank Ocean

I thought that I was dreaming, when you said you loved me.

The start of nothing, I had no chance to prepare, I couldn’t see you coming.

“Excuse me?”

Maybe it was the long night of patrolling and fighting off Purple Dragons, the extra fatigue adding to the debt of sleep I’d already accrued. Alternatively, it might have been an early sign of a concussion, from being kicked in the chest by one of those ruffian goons and getting sent shell-first into a brick wall. Either way, I must have been hallucinating.

“You heard me.” Casey gave a trademark sly grin, flashing his missing teeth. “Said I love you, D. Outta all you guys, you’re the one who, like, really cares and shit, y’know?”

Cheap can of beer in hand, he leaned in the doorway to my lab, casting a tender gaze my way as I sewed up the burst seams of his blocker glove. When he’d cast it to the floor of the living room earlier in the evening while shedding his combat attire, the bloodstained array of nails jutting from its leather had caught my eye. My concern was more for my family’s well-being that that of Casey’s gear; in the home of mutants who spent their entire lives barefoot, contaminated spikes of metal was simply a problem waiting to happen.

While sterilizing the worn leather and iron top-to-bottom with isopropyl, I noticed the blocker was dangerously close to falling apart. My role as the house’s de facto “Mister Fix-It” wasn’t solely confined to technology; whenever my brothers tore a mask or pulled the threads of their belts, somehow the mending was always left to me. My thoughts on Casey may have been…ambivalent, at best, but seeing as he’d basically become a member of the team in the past few months, I felt obligated to extend my handyman duties to his gear as well. After all, if even the rustiest, most unorthodox element of a machine isn’t working properly, the whole unit is doomed to catastrophic failure.

The start of nothing new, I could hate you now.

It’s quite alright to hate me now.

“No, I believe what I heard was the alcohol talking.” I grumbled, turning back to my needle and thread even as he crossed the threshold and paced toward me. “Why don’t you go proclaim your feelings to Raph?”

“Dude’s passed out.” He chuckled, swirling the last sips’ worth around in his can. “If being a mutant makes you guys super strong and fast and shit, why’s he got a liver like a little princess?”

“I could explain the nuances of how reptilian ethanol dehydrogenase metabolizes differently than that of humans.” I muttered, not bothering to look over my shoulder as he hoisted himself up onto the lab bench behind me. “But something tells me it’d be a waste of breath.”

“C’mon, Donnie.” He whined. “Just ‘cause half the shit you say goes way over my head, doesn’t mean I’m not interested.”

“If you’ve ever been interested in anything I’ve had to say, you certainly have a funny way of showing it.” I mused, thinking back to all the times I’d been called things like ‘dork’, ‘nerd’, ‘egghead’, and so on.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m an asshole.” He sighed, slurping the last dregs of beer before launching the can into the garbage bin in the corner of the lab. “But, like, deep down, y’know I do love you, right?”

Why did he have to keep saying it like that? It wasn’t one of those casual, platonic ‘I love ya’s Raph would give, alongside a noogie, while the two of us were tuning up his motorcycle. It definitely wasn’t one of the giddy, exuberant ‘I love you!’s from Mikey, after repairing whatever toy or video game he’d broken. No, there was something else hidden between those words, a taste of subtext straddling the line between sinister and…romantic?

“Are you seriously drunk enough that you’re mistaking me for April?” I shot back snidely, knowing it was the verbal equivalent of a gut punch to the one other person on the planet who was head over heels for the same girl as me.

“Now you’re the asshole, D.” He dramatically clutched at his heart, springing up from the bench and landing with a wobble before padding over to my side. “C’mon, we both know she ain’t lookin’ for anyone right now. I’m allowed to have eyes for someone else if I want.”

“Hmm.” I brushed him off, still focusing on the stitching job on the table before me.

His nonchalance about April got under my skin, but he did have a point. It wasn’t like either of us could force her to notice us, so until that day came, our little competition for her attention was locked in a stalemate. Hearing that Casey had accepted the same fate was strangely…touching?

When we both know that, deep down,

The feeling still, deep down, it’s good.

“You’re allowed to look for someone else too, y’know.” He slurred, draping an arm around my shoulder.

Not expecting the sudden contact, my posture stiffened in a heartbeat, leaving my spine tensed like a drawn bow. I caught a whiff of his breath as it crossed my face, hot and smelling of iron, bubblegum, and alcohol. My first reflex was to shove him away and grimace, but I suppressed it as a sensation on the back of my neck reminded me of some elementary biology: humans were warm-blooded. Casey, in particular, felt like a radiator, heart still pumping liquid heat after the adrenaline rush of our patrol, and the touch of his bare skin against mine just felt so…soothing? Another reflex, more basal and instinctual, told me to lean into the source of warmth beside me, but as the two warred, I remained perfectly still.

“And where do you suggest I start looking?” I mumbled, trying my hardest to keep my voice from wavering. “You’ve found some female mutant turtles you haven’t told us about?”

“For a genius, you’re pretty dumb sometimes, y’know that?” He snickered, face pressing even closer toward my ear. “Who says they gotta be a turtle?”

“Basic anatomy.” I huffed.

“And who says they gotta be a chick?”

In the halls of your hotel, arm around my shoulder so I could tell,

How much I meant to you, meant it sincere back then, we had time to kill back then.

At that, the lab went quiet enough that I could literally hear the needle drop from my hand. Not daring to turn my head, I shifted my gaze to his through suspicious, narrowed eyelids. This had to be some ruse, an elaborate prank designed to humiliate me. Mike or Raph were hiding just outside the door, possibly both of them, poised and waiting to burst in and laugh at the show of what appeared to be intimacy I was being led into. I’d expect nothing less of Casey.

“What are you getting out of this?” I practically whispered, hoping my speech didn’t reveal the subtle trembling that crept its way out of my core.

“Nothin’.” His voice was so husky, it basically registered as a growl. “Doin’ it ‘cause I wanna.”

At that, his free hand reached across my abdomen to grasp me by the waist, and his arm released its grip from my shoulder. In one slick move, he spun my chair around so his face was barely an inch away from mine. Before I could plan out exactly how to react, his lips closed the gap between us, planting square on mine.

You ain’t a kid no more,

We’ll never be those kids again.

#tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #casey jones #donatello #casitello #fanfic #fan fiction #frank ocean

[toonstarterz]

BECAUSE I’M NOT POPULAR, I’LL READ WATAMOTE: CHAPTER #125

Nico Tanigawa decided to waste no time and jumped right into the next field trip arc. I’m sure some fans are concerned that the pacing is a little too fast, but I honestly think that’s only because we don’t have many hints as to where this manga is going after the field trip, at least in terms of tangible school events. There’s still plenty character relationships to explore in this manga, so I’d say we just go with the flow, and see where Tomoko’s experience at the House of Mouse will lead her. 

Chapter 125: Because I’m Not Popular, I’ll Start My Field Trip

Yuri would probably die without her pockets.

Showing exposition through character is another strength of this manga. We don’t need the teacher or some omnipresent narrator to explain how the field trip is gonna go. We just need the character’s thoughts to set up the context of the chapter. Tomoko’s comment on how hands-off the teachers are implies a lack of adult supervision, which then raises the stakes for whatever shenanigans our girls will inevitably get into.  

Yoshida’s default scowl is now her default smile. I’d expect nothing less at the Happiest Place on Earth. 

Like I said, these tidbits of conversation actually give meaning to events that happen later on. In Yoshida’s case, knowing that she plans to hang out with others is going to be very significant for what’s soon to come. 

Team Normie from left to right: Finding Nemo, Glasses-kun, Short Guy I Don’t Recognize, Suzuki, Guy I Do Recognize But Don’t Remember Where, Little Fanged Bitch, Class Mom, and Pineapple-chan. 

Layouts like this are awesome because of how much they show without any words. If you showed this panel to someone unfamiliar with Watamote, they could likely tell that Nemoto and Okada don’t like each other because of how the six in the middle are facing inward, while the girls on the far ends are facing outward. 

On that note, I’ll always be impressed by how well Nemoto can hide her negative emotions under a smile. Okada, not so much. 

Perhaps this is just my limited experience with manga and anime talking, but I always find it interesting by how platonically intimate the boys and girls are in Nemoto’s group, i.e. using nicknames. Granted, close friends across different genders is nothing surprising in manga/anime, but there’s often this romantic subtext, usually from other characters, which fans often take as evidence to there being something more. In Nemoto’s group, I haven’t seen this implication at all other than first year Tomoko’s delusions. It’s rather refreshing when I come across a series that can pull this off.

Flustered Minami is annoyingly cute. 

Guess I better stop beating around the bush and address the elephant in the room.

In actuality, I had thought that Nemoto and Okada had got into a fight in the previous chapter, but I didn’t touch upon it because I didn’t think there was sufficient evidence and I would’ve been talking out of my ass. But, lo and behold, they really were having a fight. 

It’s Yuri and Mako from the previous trip all over again.

As for what that fight was about, I’m 99% sure it was about Nemoto coming out of the otaku closet. And if I may guess, I don’t think Okada has an issue with Nemoto’s interests, but that the latter lied, or at least, dodged the truth, about her desire to be a voice actress. A barrier of trust seems to have cracked between them, and because Watamote is a great manga that doesn’t let its audience take any obvious side, it’ll be interesting to see how they patch things up.

So here’s a question: Why doesn’t Minami go off with her other friends? Y’know, the ones she had before she got placed in class 3-5? Perhaps her friends were not as close to her as she originally thought, but more likely, I think it’s just that Minami is trying to cement her “place” in Katou’s clique. Given that’s still in the periphery zone, disconnecting from Katou’s group would bring her two steps back, so better that she strike now while the iron is hot.  

More like a fourth wheel, but same difference. 

Nemoto’s at it again with the half-lies. If we’re getting real here, I honestly don’t think Nemoto would join up with Tomoko’s group if she could help it. Right now, she just has a convenient excuse to not join her usual friends, and at the moment, Tomoko is her rebound. Of course, she has to play it up as her being extra friendly, or she wouldn’t be Nemoto. 

Mako, bless her soul, is obviously the go-to-gal to speak with, being the most socially adept of the three. She may just be the indisputable nice girl of the series, next to Yuu. 

I’m inclined to believe that little blurb of how they’ve never talked to each is all in Nemoto’s head, ‘cause there’s no way she’d ever be that tactless. In any case, it’s be a real treat if Yuri and Nemoto ended up on the same ride, only to start discussing their mutual buddy, Tomoko. 

Nemo gotta chill with that passive aggression. Physically imposing herself over Tomoko, and speaking in such a manner that leaves the latter with no room to argue...Nemoto is quite the manipulator, and it’s totally intentional on the mangaka’s part. On second thought, keep it up Nemoto, because it’s admittedly entertaining to see you go at her like that.

Writing about Nemoto is always hard because it’s very difficult to get a good read on her. It does often seem that she’s actively pushing Tomoko out of her comfort zone, but whether she’s doing that out of simple kindness or to feel better about herself is unclear.

I do wonder how Yen Press is going to handle the censorship for this arc. Obviously, Disneyland is going to be asterisked, or renamed into “Mouseyland” like in volume 9. But does Splash Mountain require censorship? It is a real name, so I believe it would...

I’ll get back to Nemoto and the whole mouse ears thing later. 

This scene was more significant to me than was probably intended, because I believe it’s the first time Tomoko has viewed Yuri with any obvious admiration. Yuri’s unwavering nature is one of her likeable traits, and for someone like Tomoko, who often finds herself sucked into uphill battles, being able to go against the flow must really speak to her. Hopefully, this will develop Tomoko’s side of her friendship with Yuri.

PFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTT.

Ucchi’s presence was a mandatory for this arc, and it’s great that they manage to include her in the story in a way that is both times utterly ridiculous and completely realistic for this manga. 

Playing the victim card is entirely Ucchi’s modus operandi, to varying degrees of effectiveness. It allows her to hopefully achieve her objective, while at the same time removes any responsibility for her actions. Is it an effective strategy? Certainly. Will Ucchi pull it off? Not a fucking chance. 

dem crocodile tears.

Because Ucchi, a.k.a My Legs are Numb, is such a terrible liar, she has to rely on her second tactic when the first tactic inevitably fails: false accusations. By putting the blame onto Mako, Ucchi continues to free herself of responsibility while Mako is pressured into helping her out of guilt. I call this accusation “false” because I’m not entirely sure to what extent Mako and Ucchi are friends. But it doesn’t really matter at the moment, because as long as there’s a sliver of friendship between them, Ucchi will use it as ammunition.  

I remember asking for this girl’s name back in my review of chapter 117. Wish granted. (But now I’m gonna start thinking of Studio Ghibli films whenever she shows up.)

And because nothing can ever go Ucchi’s way, her final tactic is...throwing a tantrum. Admittedly, it takes a lot for Ucchi to start openly freaking out, and only when is on the verge of losing or is losing the thing she wants. It’s here where Ucchi’s logic becomes very suspect, and her bitch tendencies start to become more apparent. 

Props to Mako, for being so collected during this hissyfit.  

Subtlety...

...Ucchi is not. The dramatic irony of this manga is spectacular whenever Emoji-girl is concerned. For the two girls here, Ucchi’s antics probably come off as her just being physically assertive. But the readers all know what’s really going on. Ucchi forcing herself between them is clearly a bold attempt at getting closer to Tomoko, and it’s crazy how supposedly meaningless actions like this suddenly carry so much meaning when performed by a particular character.

6 seconds...7 seconds....8 seconds...

I fully expect the fanart to explode with this image. 

Many people in the fandom are calling this fan-service, and in way, that’s true. but I want to distinguish what part of this is fan-service, and what isn’t. To put it finely, Yoshida dressing up in Disneyland gear is not fanservice, because the series has long since set this up as a part of Yoshida’s character, so narratively, it makes perfect sense for Yoshida to be donning mouse ears and a faux-Tigger jacket. 

What is fanservice is how Yoshida’s presented, and, in the most objective way possible, how erotic it is. It’s not just the “gap moe” of a tough girl in cute clothes, but Yoshida’s appearance is obviously meant to titillate the viewers. The roughened up demeanor, the jacket slightly falling off, the bruise clearly meant to look like a blush, and her pouty expression are all an intentional decision meant for the Yoshida fans. 

As a final note, I’m not condemning the mangaka for this, because as far as fanservice goes, this is very tasteful. Why? Because it says more about Yoshida’s attractiveness as a character than any half-assed attempt to put her in “sexy” situations.   

As I had just suggested, I love how Nico Tanigawa subverts our expectations by giving Yoshida what looks like a blush, when it’s actually a bruise. Well played.

Nemo, I don’t think anyone expected Tomoko and Yuri to be friends with Yoshida, at least as close friends. She likely finds it confusing that a delinquent like Yoshida would get along with relatively good people like Tomoko and Yuri, but as is a common theme in this manga, strong friendships are forged not through similar interests, but in shared temperaments and values, by which the T-Y-Y group most certainly have.

23 seconds...24 seconds...25 seconds...   

Funny you should think that Nemoto, considering that you were the one who first suggested you’d all get mouse ears in the first place. But in all seriousness, this surprise could just be exclusive to Yoshida. Buying mouse ears as a group falls in line with the “typical things to do at Disneyland”, so it’s natural from Nemoto’s perspective. Yoshida, whose character is rather atypical to Nemoto, likely came off as the type to be resistant to such cute things.

You have a lot to learn in this group, Nemoto. 

And this is the first hint towards the question, “What happened between Yoshida and her friends?” The common theory going around seems to be that Yoshida and her yankee friends got into a falling out, possibly over Yoshida’s cuteness, leading to the bruise on her face. Given I don’t see any other reason why she would switch plans, it does suggest that at least something foul went down, which could possibly lead to Yoshida being more comfortable with her loner crew in the future. 

Also, that bruise healed up fast.

Something tells me Nico Tanigawa are trying to beat the readers to the punch by tsukommi-ing at points where the readers may have doubts. I certainly wouldn’t want them to do this often, or would be more of a crutch than anything. But used sporadically, it helps assure the users that the mangaka has considered the same thing, and will likely proceed the story with that in mind.

67 seconds...68 seconds...69 seconds...

Ucchi, BLINK for crying out loud! 

Nemoto: I’ve always liked how Nemoto’s opinion on Tomoko is neither positive or negative. Just...interesting. If I had to say where I think this opinion will end, it’d be a begrudging respect for Tomoko and her weirdness.

Ucchi: Emoji transcended the fourth wall and came out with an insight straight out of 4chan. Her annoyance, I believe, stems from a realization that Tomoko is more likeable than Ucchi thought, which sort of negates that feeling of importance Ucchi gets from Tomoko’s supposed attention. 

Yuri: Not surprisingly, Yuri totally blindsided Nemoto and Ucchi when referring to their four-person group. I don’t think Yuri’s eager to add more people into her circle, but hey, Nico Tanigawa may come to surprise us.

Mako: With that stoic expression, Mako? Then again, only a bestie like Mako could see the subtle changes in Yuri’s emotional state. 

Yoshida: So aggressively cute! Leave it to Yoshida to head the group at a time like this. I must admit, I was worried that Yoshida would fall too much into the “delinquent likes cute things” cliche, but I like how it’s done here. Yoshida’s demeanor isn’t a lightswitch that changes between ‘violent’ and ‘adorable’ with no in-between. Her toughness is still present, whether she’s beating up Tomoko, or fawning over cat plushies. 

This was a set-up chapter, all things considered, but it gets the job done by hyping the readers for what’s to come. If I know this series as well as I hope I do, something will happen in this arc that will change up a character relationship for the rest of the school year. It could be anything at this point–Yoshida breaking off with her delinquent buddies, Ucchi giving a cringefest-of-a-confession to Tomoko, Nemoto and Yuri sharing an unexpected bond–the possibilities are endless.

Place your bets!

#watamote #watamote review #no matter how i look at it it's you guys' fault i'm not popular! #chapter 125 #tomoko kuroki #yuri tamura #mako tanaka #hina nemoto #akane okada #asuka katou #minami #masaki yoshida #ucchi #review

[groupkiller]

Living in the moment

David Mitchell taught me about “living in the moment.”

https://youtu.be/6HTt6QJqzxk

Sometimes like during sports finals or movies you THINK you are living in a good moment, but later you have to reevaluate and realize you sat through 1,5 hour that turned out to be bad moments. People might agree that a football match was exciting while it was on, but still wont categorise the moments watching that match as very good, if their teem looses the game.

I will in no way deny that I have been intertained by Sherlock season 4.

I don’t deny that I don’t own the show. It was never my personal fanfiction (though it felt like it).

In The Final Problem I WAS at the edge of my seat, (despite inconsistanscies) I felt entertained, smiled, clapped and so on, untill the end, when I got sad.

But I think it is ok to be disapointed in movies and TV shows that don’t follow through on “their promises”. I put it in “” because at least the johnlockers felt the creators promised romance, but a lot of other people didn’t.

I think they should have put less subtext in the show, if all they wanted to do was a friendship story. They could have made it much more clear that the soft moments were just about friendship, if they wanted to.

(If they did want a romance or just wanted an open ending, so people could read into the show what they want, I think that is not as good as being clear, especially in a show where a lot of queer people have representation at stake).

They didn’t have to make John act jealous of/at Irene, didn’t have to include all the innuendo and gay jokes. They could have told a friendship story very clearly without that sub textual ambiguity.

I didn’t expect Harry to end up with Draco, or Tintin to kiss Hadock. Even though/if shippers of those couples (I don’t ship them) claim there to subtext. I think we can agree there is way less foreshadowing and build up for a Harry-Draco affair, than a john-lock kiss.

So the expectations come from the subtext.

The subtext led us to believe that we could expect romance.

I could put a million quotes here about “the things Sherlock always wanted to say but never did” and “romantic entanglement that… could complete you as a human being”. But we would be here all week then - besides you probably KNOW all the quotes.

Point is: subtext led to johnlock expectations for many people, and that makes us reevaluate the season (and for some the whole series) as “living in a bad moment” because stuff we love turns out to be queerbaiting.

I see people saying things like: “don’t expect the creators to cater to your ship.”

“Don’t hate the series just because your ship didn’t become canon.”

“It’s not queerbaiting, they ALWAYS wanted to just do a friendship story.”

“You see things that aren’t there, you just convinced yourselves that it’s there, but it never was.”

And i don’t hate the show. I hate the queerbaiting, and I honestly think it is there, because of the vast amount of subtext.

I don’t think you should ever hate on people, nomatter how disapointed you are. And sending the creators HATE is not something I condole. I think we should keep a civil tone while certainly telling them, we are disspointed. But lets’s not send any death threats ok!

I do feel intertained (mostly by season 1-3) but also by season 4. I just have to reevaluate the last 4,5 hour as living in “not as good a moment as I thought”.

In The Big Bang Theory people who wanted Sheldon to stay an unfeeling machine might be as disapointed after “the ShAmy” became canon as I feel right now.

But I think people CAN actually expect show creators to take into account what the viewers want. And I think a lot of people wanted Sheldon and Amy to have sex. A lot of people wanted Ross and Rachel to get together. A lot of shows DO listen to many of the viewers and try to make their favorite ship happen (at least if it’s straight ships).

So I don’t think johnlockers are crazy for having believed that finally the queer community would get a ship become canon on main stream tv in 2017.

That said, I know that far from EVERYONE wanted Johnlock.

These viewers might think it is great to see a fulfilled story arch where Sherlock starts out as an unfeeling machine (due to childhood trauma), but finally he became a good man, learned to have friends, learned Greg’s name, and continued helping people with cases.

But I think we WERE promised a romantic arch. Not just a “judge for yourselves, if you want johnlock to be there, just read it into the show”-ending.

Imagine what it would feel like if Rose hadn’t wanted to hold Jack’s hand in the freezing water after Titanic sunk.

I think people watching Forrest Gump would reevaluate, what they thought was living in a great moment watching a good movie, and label it a bad moment, if the movie ended with Forest visiting Jenny, and it turned out:

Forrest didn’t actually care that much about her. They were good friends, had coffee and that’s all. He then went on to sit at bus stops talking to strangers about celebrities he met, great adventures he had and offering them chocolate.

If in the end it turned out that his words: “why don’t you love me Jenny? I’m not a smart man, but I know what love is” weren’t really important to his story and character arch at all, it wasn’t always about Jenny. Forrest asking her to mary him because he’d make a good husbond… that was just a fleeting remark, not important at all. Then I think people would have felt cheated. Like they were promised a love story they didn’t get.

Ok I might be unfair because Forrest Gump had a clear romantic arch, no one would deny. But with Sherlock, many would deny johnlock. (Because of heteronormativity or whatever, To be fair I haven’t really listened to many of the arguments against johnlock ^_~ who knows, some might be legit)

“Who you are isn’t important” Well the johnlockers really thought that WAS important in adotion to all the interesting cases. Romance WAS an important part of the story, and if they didn’t want us to expect that, I think a lot of the scenes in the show are quite weird and out of place for a platonic friendship story.

In conclusion: - I do love the show, also season 4. - I was excited, but think I was promised more than I got. - I don’t like the queerbaiting. - I think people who deny the queer subtext and the promises that gives us are not nessesarily homophobes, but too grounded in heteronormativity to understand how devistating this unfulfilled romance is to johnlockers.

I am a writer, and one of the most important rules of writing is: if you promise the reader something, remember to give them what you promised or explain why they can’t have it. You should always have beta readers tell you, the promises THEay THINK you made to them. So if you made promises without being aware, you can adress them.

There might be good reasons why you wont give the reader the romance you hinted at. Maybe you as a writer only intended it to be a friendship story. But then you have to make that clear.

In short stories open endings are fine. But in novel-length-works people expect answers to the story questions they develop along the way.

And though many casual viewers think that a friendship as end goal and a more mature Sherlock might have been the clear goal of this series. There are CLEARLY a huge group, who thinks the show promised something, and didn’t deliver. And they didn’t explain why. If they did anything, they opened the ending, so you could enterpret it as you wish, but that’s not enough after 16,5 hours in my opinion.

There is also the political discussion about queer representation to take into account.

But from a pure story-telling perspective: What I thought was living in a great moment turned out to be an intertaining but unsatisfying moment in retrospect.

And I think a good show should be able to entertain in more than the moments it takes to see the show first time. It should keep on making you feel like you came full circle with the characters.

And a huge group doesn’t feel that with only this friendship. Or the open ending.

But what about the people who would have been sad and felt it would have been wrong if they kissed? Probably the big majority of viewers.

Isn’t it their show as well?

Yes it is. But i refuse to believe that in 2017 all the casuals would have recoiled and said: “where the hell did that come from,” if a tiny montage with the most obvious gay subtext had been incorporated.

It’s ok to surprise your reader/viewer, as long as you DO foreshadow.

I am uncertain about how many would have reevaluated their moments (16,5 hours) as bad moments, if johnlock had happened.

Maybe if they never rewatched the series and thus never picked up on the gay subtext in light of the ending… Again going back to the idea of a good show being able to entertain again and again with more depth every time you watch it.

If the epilouge to Harry Potter had him arriving to platform 9 ¾ with Draco, kissing him, I would have reread the books to see where I had missed the foreshadowing. (I did this emediately after book 6, because I loved Snape. And by looking for foreshadowing that could redeem him, I picked up on the Lily-thing. Told all my friend, noone believed me until book 7, but everyone then said it WAS great because of the well hidden but totally pressent foreshadowibg of Snape’s story arch) And i hope most viewers would have done the same with Sherlock, had johnlock happened explicitly - realizing how much romantic build up there was.

Then they might have reevaluated their moments as giving them a ship they didn’t ask for but at least with good story telling and build up behind it. Maybe be angry at the show’s straightbaiting/heterobaiting?

I HATED that Catnis lost her sister in the end of Hunger games, because i wanted a happy ending. But I still think the books are great because they dared show that in war there is usually no happy ending. And I think back, and realize the story of Hunger games from the start told me that all my favorites could die a meaningless dearh, that was part of the story and sort of the point.

So it’s not like I can’t enjoy good story telling even if it gives me an ending I didn’t want, AS LONG AS the book/show/movie warned me and foreshadowed events.

But in Sherlock I feel like they foreshadowed a romantic ending in EVERY episode, and didn’t deliver. I felt like they deliberately put in hints only to not follow through.

But I had hoped for johnlock, and for a lot of casual viewers to think: “oh, I should have seen that coming, but it doesn’t change that John and Sherlock are a great, and I love when they solve cases, and it doesn’t matter if they share the bedroom.”

Now casuals think things are as they have always been, and should be.

It’s still 1895, eventhough it’s actually 2017.

And Johnlockers cry because of this entertaining, but queerbaiting opotunity that was wasted.

@quietlyprim @jenna221b @loudest-subtext-in-tv

#johnlock #the final problem #tjlc is real #tjlc #sherlock