#uHHH

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

Charlie: “So this is what a full hotel looks like…”

Vaggie: “Think it’ll survive until Extermination day?”

Charlie: “I don’t know if I’LL survive to Extermination day.”

Vaggie: “Aww, babe.”

Charlie: “Seriously, who keeps ordering pizza??? We all already KNOW the cannibals will just skip it and try chewing on the poor delivery person!”

Vaggie: “My bet’s on Angel Dust. He’s not exactly thrilled the place got filled up with ‘shit smiling judgmental prudes.’”

Charlie: “Whyyy didn’t I remember the cannibals have a whole dress-code thingy?”

Vaggie: “They are being polite about it though.”

Charlie: “They keep eyeing Angel Dust’s exposed thighs like they’re chicken wings.”

Vaggie: “And if they wanted to eat him up in any other way, he’d be thrilled.”

Charlie: (growling) “Some of them keep looking at YOUR thighs as if they were-”

Vaggie: “Anything other than property of Charlie Morningstar?”

Charlie: “-Vaggie they want to TEAR YOU APART!”

Vaggie: “And they’re not actually trying it, which is polite, even if they’re still talking about how angels might taste whenever I’m in the room.”

Charlie: (pout) “You taste good.”

Vaggie: “Not like that, babe.”

Charlie: “How could the rest of you not taste good too??”

Vaggie: “Ask the cannibals. Meat flavors based on where the meat thing lived and what it ate, something something- What if angel steaks taste like artificial food coloring?”

Charlie: “I like those-!”

Vaggie: "I know." (laughing) “Maybe that’s another reason why you’re the woman of my dreams.”

Charlie: “Am I?”

Vaggie: “The one and only.”

Charlie: “You’d never… think about leaving me for someone else?”

Vaggie: “NO?”

Charlie: “Someone a little more badass maybe?”

Vaggie: “Not possible. You called heaven out for being total bullshit. In a song.”

Charlie: “Maybe someone you had an instant and deep connection with?”

Vaggie: “Like the woman that bandaged my eye socket and took me home with her and nursed me through physical and emotional hell all because she also thought sinners might be people worth caring about?”

Charlie: “Well what about someone who… is just better? At the whole. Everything.”

Vaggie: “Literally who. Who the fuck-”

Charlie: “Carmilla?”

Vaggie: “Car-hhhhHHH." (chokes)

Vaggie: "AHAHAHAHAH! Charlie! WHAT!?”

Charlie: “She’s cool. She’s one of those, those muffin things right? Angel Dust said-”

Vaggie: “A milf, sweetie. It’s milf and PLEASE also listen to Husk’s reality checks whenever Angel Dust opens his well meaning but dumb as shit whore mouth.”

Angel Dust: (distantly) “My HOT and SEXY whore mouth heard that, toots!”

Vaggie: (yelling back) “Then go stick a dick in it!”

Angel Dust: “I’m tryin’~”

Charlie: (used to this) (ignoring them) “So the whole private training battle song thing was, not a turn on for you? At all?”

Vaggie: “If I ever call Carmilla Carmine ‘mommy’ it’ll be because she just signed my adoption papers.”

Charlie: “Oh! Okay! Juuuust wanted to check.”

Charlie: “…..”

Charlie: “Are you gonna ask about me and the head-to-heart I had with-”

Vaggie: “No.”

Charlie: “-because I was literally thinking about you the whole time-“

Vaggie: (smile) “That just took a perfectly non-worrying thing and made it sound bad.”

Charlie: “Is there a thing like a- an elf??”

Vaggie: “Aunt you’d like to fuck?”

Charlie: “Well not ME personally. But Rosie is very impressive.”

Vaggie: “You looked more impressed up in heaven.”

Charlie: “Huh? Heaven??”

Vaggie: “Nothing- never mind. I do actually have a lady-related question for you though.”

Charlie: “What does heaven have to do with- what?”

Vaggie: “I think I’m in love.”

Charlie: “WHAT!?”

Vaggie: “She’s ripped out my heart and I want to thank her for it.”

Charlie: “Th-thh that’s wait how when-?”

Vaggie: “Charlie.”

Charlie: “-y, yes?”

Vaggie: “Can we keep inviting Susan over, even after Extermination day?”

Charlie: “…”

Charlie: “Susan.”

Vaggie: “Charlie please? Please? She's the granny I don't deserve and desperately need in my life. Please please please please-”

Charlie: “But, Vaggie- She HATES everyone!”

Vaggie: “I know!”

Charlie: “And she SAYS it!?”

Vaggie: “And it’s so fucking cool.”

Charlie: “She said you dress like a hooker!”

Vaggie: “Angel Dust was furious. I think he would’ve thrown a punch at her, in defense of hookers everywhere, if Husk hasn’t grabbed him.”

Charlie: “A LAZY hooker!”

Vaggie: “That one hit home and I’ll cherish it’s sting forever.”

Charlie: “She’s not NICE. She doesn’t even PRETEND to be nice like the other cannibals do!”

Vaggie: “Isn’t that great?” (grinning) “She’s like, the anti-Alastor….”

Charlie: (sigh)

Charlie: “I guess… being brutally, painfully, rudely honestly about your feelings is… not the worst thing someone can be.”

Vaggie: “YES! Can we adopt the creepy old mean lady?”

Charlie: “She can visit. We are NOT inviting her to LIVE here.”

Vaggie: (smiling)

Charlie: “….”

Charlie: (drooping) “…not unless she wants to.”

Vaggie: “Thanks, sweetie.” (kiss) “She never would. She hates us all and especially the hotel. Ask her and she’ll tell you, in detail, how all our decorating ideas are terrible and she’s only here to grab the free snacks, shove some angel leftovers in her basket, and then fuck off to her own perfect home back in Cannibal Town.”

Charlie: “So why scare me like that by asking? SUSAN in the attic! Ughghgh…”

Vaggie: “’cause it’s nice hearing you’d be open to it anyway.”

Charlie: “Mmrmph.”

Vaggie: “I like remembering that you’re like this.”

Charlie: “Whipped marshmallow.”   

Vaggie: "That Angel Dust again?"

Charlie: "Maybe."

Vaggie: "I've got a better word for you."

Charlie: "Like 'girlfriend?"

Vaggie: “Like amazing.”

Charlie: (snorts) (smiles) "Heh. Alright, flattery accepted."

Vaggie: "My wonderfully, adorably dramatic, heart stopping and breathtakingly passionate girlfriend, the most incredible person I've ever met, who-"

Charlie: (laughing) “Now who’s being a sweetie?”

Vaggie: “Charlie, I’m seri- whoah!”

Niffty: (lifting up floor board vaggie was standing on and peeking up at them) “Hey guys!”

Charlie: “Niffty!” (hug lifting vaggie to safety) “W- hi! Um! What is it?”

Niffty: “A bad day not to wear underwear!”

Vaggie: “And a good day to Die.”

Niffty: "I WISH!" (GIGGLES) “News from the hotel gossip line! S.O.S from Husk- he says Angel Dust and some cannibals are fighting over who gets to put the new pizza delivery in their mouths while Cherri’s taking bets and also shots.”

Charlie: "Shots of alcohol?"

Niffty: "Laser gun!"

Charlie: "Nooooo I thought we'd cleaned up everything after Pen's last inventing spree!"

Niffty: "Missed one. She keeps missing too. She fried the pizza."

Vaggie: "Instead of?"

Niffty: (GRINS) "The pizza delivery person!"

Vaggie: “Ugh. We look away for Ten. Minutes.”

Charlie: “Well that’s not- that’s not TOO bad! At least Sir Pentious isn’t-”

Niffty: “His corpse is in the lobby.”

Charlie: “-right. Okay.”

Vaggie: “Why is he a corpse in the hotel lobby this time?”

Niffty: “The cannibals accidentally ate his tongue while he was trying to show Cherri how long it was and then he choked while proving he has no gag reflect and can unhinge his jaws.”

Charlie: “Oh.”

Niffty: “The cannibals want to snack on him again but Susan keeps yelling at them about ‘crumbling standards’ and ‘back in HER day-‘”

Vaggie: “I love her.”

Charlie: “I’m right here.”

Vaggie: “You kinda love her too right now.”

Charlie: (pulls face) “She can come to dinner every other week. If we live. For now though, let’s just, um.”

Vaggie: “Go save the snake man?”

Niffty: “That man is DEAD!”

Charlie: “Resuscitate. We should go resuscitate the snake m- Sir Pentious.”

Niffty: (giggles) “And I’m gonna go order another pizza boy~” (scurries back under floor board)

Vaggie: “Wait, Niffty-”

Charlie: “Niffty! Are YOU the one who’s been-? Vaggie NO-”

Vaggie: (spear out) (in pursuit) “GET OUT OF THE CRAWL SPACES RIGHT NOW AND COME BACK HERE, YOU LITTLE-”

#hazbin hotel #charlie morningstar #vaggie #chaggie #niffty hazbin hotel #incorrect quotes #vaggie dealing with the fallout of charlie talking relationship stuff with angel dust #susan as vaggie's ideal snarky grandma #pentious... tried #niffty is infesting the hotel #(with chaos) #(and hopefully at least a little bloodshed) #vaggie is not worried about charlie being alone with rosie she's worried about #uhhh #nothing #totally nothing at all #the cannibals are being good hotel guests #by the standards of hell anyway #i like the idea of niffry scurrying around under the hotels floors... in it's walls... #hunting her prey in the darkness and #giving everyone jumpscares

[wickardbahl]

#jessie vard #his kitty #cuphead-sona #fulfillment #mentes #chatwithme #uhhh #boykiss #anime and manga #dimples

[shein3812]

Whfff, they live in my head now (full page below)

#tf2 #fanart #tf2 scout #tf2 pyro #tf2 heavy #tf2 medic #tf2 engineer #tf2 sniper #tf2 demoman #UHHH #holy shit i messed up Scout's phrase #um don't mind that

[plnetl]

Shrek crock 🤖

This was rushed but u hope yall like it 🫡

#lifesteal smp #lifesteal #lifestealsmp #prince zam #princezam #prince zam fanart #uhhh #yeah #practice #drawing #art #digital art #miku binder #plnetl doodle #plnetl

[harpoonsnotspoons]

Chomp

#dirk strider #homestuck dirk #dirk homestuck #homestuck #cannibalism tw #I don't know if this counts as gore #Uhhh #meat #Sure yeah that works #I don't know why my art just got way better all of a sudden but now I actually like it #🕶️🔌 #Hal.art

[girlboss003]

Oh I’m like so very extremely totally regular and normal about Dante and his slutty little fangs.

#OHMYGOD #i need him #dmc5 #dmc #dmc dante #dante sparda #uhhh #ughhhh #capcom #give him to me #my babygirl #devil may cry #i need to sleep

[saelique]

cooking with him is a absolute nightmare, with cookies that were burnt until black, rice that was wet and soggy, you really can’t count how many times he made the kitchen a complete mess. so this time, you would make something rather easy to follow ! just a simple pancake recipe that took half an hour to make ! not that hard right ?? but he still somehow managed to fuck everything up by haing eggshells in the batter, the batter itself wasn’t mixed well enough hence the flour lumps. but the proud look on his face made it hard to refuse his platter of pancakes, so what the hell should you do now ?

— dazai, bachira, kaiser, reo, tecchou, boothill, sampo, itto, ayato, cyno, ranpo, nikolai, gojo ?

#౨ৎ⋆˚｡⋆ : novels ! #I DUNNO WHATS DIS AGAIN D: #uhhh #yeah !! > < #dazai x reader #bsd x reader #bllk x reader #x reader fluff #genshin impact x reader #Hsr x reader #honkai star rail #blue lock #Dazai osamu #nikolai x reader #bsd fluff #Bllk fluff #Hsr fluff #hsr x you #bsd x you #genshin x you #jjk x reader #jjk x you #gojo x reader

[cowboy-robooty]

PruPan (Prussia x Japan) For the grid

I know who sent this. I can smell your prupan and self-ship wif japan from a mile away **heart eyes emoji** thank you for being the only mf who wants to hear my opinions. anyways so i thought about it and realized actually prussia and japans dynamic is the greatest thing ever. Because see i believe in cuck japan romantically FOREVER. i think japan has like best broship in the platonic dating style (if you experience that shit you know what i mean) with america and like hes emotionally fulfilled from that but also he desperately wants a boyfriend or girlfriend or oysterfriend just anyone to have that shoujo romance and tentacle freak sideways tango with. but the thing is that he literally always fails and is in one-sided crushes Forever and always and its always japan crying to his best bro america about his fail ass love life and america is like lol couldnt be me! but it's fine because he still has his best bro and like yknow... its like how family and friendship is two different things that are both need. like moral orel about the f words (family, faith, friends) but with b. bros, booty, and bazinga... like idubbbz! (as long as you have one of those you won't be lonely). but anyways see i believe japans biggest crush of all is on italy and obviously prussia has his huge ginormous crush on italy too but like i think that actually they are aware of eachothers crushes but dont care because they dont see eachother as threats at all bc theyre like "omg this dude is so cooked he aint even competition lol i feel bad for him" towards eachother.

and i think its actually really funny because see prussia is a desperate motherfucker and honestly not hard to pull at all. like if you have sex with him hes the type who goes "uhmm youre my boyfriend now right?" or if you confess to him hell take your feelings genuinely seriously and think about it and 90% of the time end up saying YES!!! I LIKE YOU TOO!!!!!! and japan is also desperate but he would literally date anybody Except prussia. like it's like how italy will fuck anybody Except Prussia. LIke japan could potentially get together with anybody under the right circumstances except prussia lol even if they were trapped in alkatraz together for 18 years he would never be prussia's prison boyfriend he just doesnt have the capacity to love him. and its really funny because prussia is literally the only mf who has the capacity to feel romantic love towards japan in a twist of horrible fate because japan pissed off cupid in his past life and will never ever fucking win at romance. The only conceivable way is if he asked out prussia but prussia is the only mf he would rather die a virgin with while stranded on an island for 3000 years with than fuck and try to repopulate the planet with yaoi babies. so yeah they compell me a lot in this sense because this is fucking hilarious and amazing and I'd like for them to act pitying to eachother about their crushes on italy bc they're like "mhm mhm yeah you have a chance (lying)" even though they both strapped in the same jigsaw trap lawl. but I dont think i ship them because of what i said above. thank you for sending this though this was some really good shit to think about and i think ill draw them interacting more because this is an incredible discovery.... best discovery since alfred wagner and the tectonic plates !

#hetalia #aph #hws #aph japan #hws japan #hws prussia #aph prussia #uhhh #prupan #? its about being asked it #itapan #cuck itapan #pruita #cuck pruita #draws #ask

[gay-poet-gabriel]

Dally.,, smooching Tim’s cheek 😳😳

okay anon this is a little gay btut.g.ar.hr.dasufidiug

but theyre happy together

#the outsiders #my art #my doodles #gay #dally winston #tim sheperd #OMFG WHAT IS THEIR SHIP NAME AGAIN #Uhhh #TALLY #tally #fanart

[vesselvindicate]

(x)

#uhhh #twitter #meme #sure

[jofiah]

Call me burger the. the way I court her... pound her

#uhhh #yeah #burg her #another terrible post that entered my mind fully formed

[pimsri]

“Resurrection”

#pimsriart #pimsriart2023 #I have been playing so much path of titans ahhhhh #dinosaur is my childhood hyperfixation lol #but i literally don't know anything else #i'm dumb and science can't get into my brain pls don't ask me which dino are they bc i don't know DX #dinosaur #uhhh #iguanodon #i think #and some #raptors #birds #the text is from mahler's symphony no2 finale

[michelle-jacksons-art-blog]

Part 2 in the reblogs 💖

#astv #now imagine this to the sound of Torero by Chayanne #across the spiderverse #across the spider verse fanart #atsv fanart #miguel o hara #miguel o'hara #peter benjamin parker #peter b parker #miles morales #pavitr prabhakar #lego spiderman #uhhh #spiderverse fanart #fanart #my art #is there a tag for this ship? there must be #im kinda too lazy to look it up rn #im still sleepy #also this is part one so part two coming right up #lego99

[ratbastarddotfuck]

fucking a clown and you put your dick in and everything's going great, but as soon as you try to pull out of that clussy your cock just keeps getting longer and longer until you have just meters worth of dick lying in a mess on the bed and aw man I have to stop writing this post because I realised it's definitely someone's real kink and I can't handle the pressure of finishing this post in a satisfying way. wait nevermind I got it. you finally reach the end and the tip of your penis has become a beautiful bouquet of plastic roses that squirt water when you sniff them. except the water is. well. you know.

#sorry #the system speaks #clowns #clownfucking #uhhh #sorry again

[meruz]

my cat waking me up in the morning

#toedscruel #toedscool #pokemon #pokemon sv #uhhh #cw fungus #???? i know the last of us is big rn so maybe ppl would want a warning idk #meruzart

[p-wrryyy-mordial-soup]

#splatoon #side order #my art #sure its art #uhhh #amongus coded