#update immediately after posting i found the sub from last night it was on the floor so mystery solved | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

angryschnauzer · 3 years

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Just What I Need

Summary; Working in a coffee shop you meet all sorts of people, but one customer in particular is always friendly, a local Detective from the nearby precinct. When one night he orders through a delivery service rather than in store, you get more than a tip when you make the delivery.

Fandom; Nomis (Night Hunter) Movie, Henry Cavill

Pairing: Detective Walter Marshall x Female Reader (no race or size specified)

Trope: Coffee Shop Meet Cute

Warnings: NSFW, 18+, Flirting, Masturbation (male), Oral Sex (female recieving), unprotected sex, Vaginal Sex, Snowstorms.

I do not operate a tag list but instead please pop over and follow @angryschnauzerwrites and put that blog onto notifications, then you’ll get an alert every time i post a new story. My Masterlist got too long and tumblr ate it, so all my past stories can also be found on my AO3, link HERE

A/N: I am considering expanding this story, depending if people like it and want me to? Let me know! <3

Just What I Need

Running the steam through the coffee machine you wiped the nozzle and smiled, there were just fifteen minutes until closing and the coffee shop you worked at was all but abandoned. Just your manager in the back counting the cash takings, and you were getting ready to box up the remaining muffins and cookies for the homeless shelter volunteer to collect dead on closing time.

You didn’t mind working the late shift, in fact you preferred it over the early shift opening up at 7am. The 7am crowd were grumpy, rude and always in a rush. The 7pm customers were tired, quiet, and always thankful for whatever caffeinated delights you provided them with.

The bell over the door rang as it opened and you looked up over the cups that were stacked on top of the machine, smiling at you saw the weary familiar face coming towards you;

“Good Evening Detective” you smiled as the beast of a man stood at the counter. His face softened as he saw you, his shoulders dropping a little as he relaxed.

“Hey… Sorry I’m in so late… you’re still open, right?”

You glanced at the clock;

“Another ten minutes. What can i get you?”

You watched as he cast his gaze up to the handwritten chalkboard menu’s above the counter;

“You got any Chilli left?”

“Sure, a couple of pots in the fridge. Want me to warm it up?”

He paused for a moment, as if trying to process the most technical question through his tired mind;

“No… yes… urghhh…” he took a deep breath; “Yeah… if you wouldn’t mind. I’m so fuckin’ tired i think I’d burn my apartment down if i tried to use the stove”

“Sure thing” you said with a smile as you got to work.

You made small talk as you prepared his order, pulling out the sides and condiments that came with the Chilli meal;

“Hey, you want a free muffin?”

“I’m not really into sweet things this late at night… what flavours you got?”

“How about an Apple Cinnamon? It’ll last overnight and still be fresh enough for breakfast”

The Detective smiled and nodded, pulling his wallet out as you finished bagging his order and rang it through for him, paying before you handed the bag to him;

“Have a good evening Detective”

As he turned he smiled at you;

“Call me Walter”

Three days later and you were on the late shift again. Again it was quiet, just the soft sound of tyres driving through slushy snow outside the only noise since around 6pm as just a couple of customers nursed steaming mugs of coffee from their window seats. You saw the big silver truck pull up in the space outside the coffeeshop and smiled, there was only one customer that drove a truck that huge and if you were being honest with yourself you were developing quite a crush on the curly haired Detective.

The moment he walked through the door you were smiling at him;

“Detective” you greeted him happily

“Didn’t i say to call me Walter last time i was here?”

“I like Detective, has a nice authority ring to it” you said with a wink; “What can i get you tonight?”

He paused for a moment, and as you reached for a notepad to jot down his order you missed the slight eyebrow raise and smirk at what you’d said before he cleared his throat;

“What have you got that i can eat in my office without facing the wrath of my Lieutenant for making the department stink?” he said with a grin as he leaned on the counter.

“I got Mozzarella and Pesto Subs? Tuna Melt?”

“Tuna is a no. The case isn’t going well, no fish. Gimme two Mozzarella Subs, and the largest black coffee you do”

“Sure thing. I’ll put a fresh pot on and get those sub’s on the press”

As you started to prepare his order his phone rang, and you couldn’t help but to listen in;

“... i’ll be like five minutes, i ain’t eaten all day… yeah ok… i’ll grab a box…”

He hung up and nodded to the cakes;

“Can i get a dozen muffins to go too? Got some grunts that are jealous that i got to escape the paperwork…”

“Sure thing”

Loading a box you picked what you knew were the best flavours and the freshest bakes;

“You know, we’re on Uber Eats. As much as its nice to see a friendly face, we can deliver to the Precinct”

“I… I have no idea what that is…”

“Its a food delivery app. Here, give me your phone…”

He unlocked it and set it down and rested his elbows on the counter as he watched;

“You go to the app store and just download it. Put in your location and it’ll bring up nearby eateries and you can search for us. It has all the standard menu on. Save your card details or link it to paypal, and its super easy, it even keeps you updated when the order is being prepared or its out for delivery”

He smiled as you pushed the phone back to him, locking the screen and pushing it back into his tight jeans;

“That’s all well and good, but then i wouldn’t get a chance to see my favourite coffee shop girl now, would i?”

You leaned forward and grinned, keeping your voice low;

“Order between 6.45 and 7pm and i snag the deliveries and do them on my way home”

Walter pushed the key into the lock, opening the door to his apartment and groaning as his body ached from tiredness. He should be elated, they caught the killer, the evidence was logged and couldn’t be disputed… and yet he was tired to his core. He’d been at his desk for longer than he’d been home, and when the Lieutenant had finally ordered him to go him a little after 5pm, it had still taken him the better part of an hour to finish up and leave the building.

Shutting the door behind him he felt his stomach rumble. He didn’t even need to look in the fridge to know it was completely empty, devoid of anything even vaguely edible. Checking his phone he saw that it was a little after 6.30pm and a thought fired across his mind, a smile forming. Fifteen minutes later he’d added far more to his online basket than he ever would have done in store, but for the first time he was able to see exactly what the creations were whereas in the store it was just a big pile of weird looking cakes and bakes. By 6.50pm he’d entered his card details and completed the order, the little update screen stating delivery would be by 7.30pm, just enough time to grab a shower, after all if it was you that would deliver, he should probably shower for the first time in 72 hours having rushed out of the apartment three mornings in a row due to new leads in the case.

The shower was far too enjoyable to rush, and after he’d washed his hair he started on his body, soaping over his chest and stomach before he paid extra attention to his dick. The anticipation of just the possibility of seeing you had him hard in seconds, and resting his head back against the tiled wall he quickly worked his hand over himself. He got lost in the moment, his mind taking him to places it shouldn’t, imagining his hand was yours, thinking about that time he saw you wearing over the over the knee knit socks and a skirt, how your ass was the perfect roundness, how your lips would look stretched around his dick… he came with a groan, thick white ropes falling to the shower floor as every ounce of stress left his body, his body shuddering when he was finally spent.

He was halfway through drying himself when he heard a knock at the door to his apartment, he eyes going wide when he saw it was 7.20pm;

“Fuck!”

He’d gotten carried away in the shower, and now he had to quickly rush to wrap a towel around his waist as a second knock came just as he reached the door, taking a deep breath before opening it and seeing you standing on the doorstep shivering in your padded coat, holding two takeout bags;

“Hey! Come in, come in, Jeez its freezing out there…”

Stepping into the apartment you couldn’t help but to look him up and down, attempting to hide your reaction as you could clearly see the distinct outline of something rather large bulging against the fabric of the fluffy white towel;

“Hey D-d-detective… Y-y-yeah it’s d-d-dropping fast out t-t-there… radio s-s-said it was g-g-gonna be a wind chill of minus t-t-twenty nine by eight o’clock… what a n-n-night to have my b-b-bike, huh?” You carefully dropped the two bags onto his coffee table as you spoke.

“You cycled here? On that pedal bike that is always chained up outside the coffee shop?” he asked incredulously, immediately forgetting his current state of undress. Shutting the door he immediately wrapped his arms around you, pulling you to his chest; “You’re gonna stay here until you’re warmed up, i’m gonna make you a hot coffee and to warm you up from the inside too...”

“I ain’t gonna complain to that” you mumbled, your face pressed to his chest as you suddenly melted against him, warming your cheek against his firm muscles before turning your head to warm the other one and he let out a little gasp as your cold hands pressed against his sides.

“I also said for you to call me Walter…” he said quietly.

Pulling your head back you smiled at him;

“Thank you, Walter. You’re the best… though you’re the first delivery i’ve made where i’ve been greeted by someone in just a towel”

“Sorry, let me go put some clothes on…”

You tighten your grip around his waist;

“I wasn’t complaining…”

There was no poignant pause, no longing gazes, his lips met with yours and the kiss was fierce and hungry. He was pushing your coat down your arms and you reluctantly released your hold from his waist to let it drop to the floor, your sweater following soon after. Your lips met again and he was lifting you, wrapping your legs around his waist as his hand rested on your ass beneath your skirt as he walked you through the apartment before dropping you on his bed.

He was pulling your boots off your feet as you scrambled up the bed, your hands reaching for your thigh high socks when he suddenly caught your hands in his;

“Leave those on…”

You paused and grinned, before his lips met yours again and he was on top of you, his hands sliding up your skirt and bunching it around your waist as he pressed a trail of open mouthed kisses down the valley of your breasts and over your stomach, before briefly lifting his head enough to pull your panties down your legs and toss them aside.

As he lowered his mouth to your core his gaze was intense, vivid blue shining through the dim light of his bedroom, his tongue pushing through your soaked petals and parting them as his beard brushed against your skin, heightening all of the sensations. Wrapping his arms around your thighs he pulled you closer to his mouth, his tongue pushing into you and he started to fuck you with it whilst his bearded face tickled your clit. You were squealing and struggling to stay still, needing to anchor yourself on something as your hips bucked and your orgasm started to rapidly approach, your hands finding their way to his still wet hair and your fingers wrapping around the dark curls as he pressed a hand to your stomach to keep you still, growling at your taste on his tongue as he felt you shake as your orgasm took over.

When your body had finally stopped shaking Walter pressed a chaste kiss to the inside of each of your thighs before he sat back on his haunches, licking his lips where he could still taste you on them. Pushing yourself up onto your elbows you grinned at him, your gaze travelling down his thick chest to his stomach, and the trail of hair that led beneath the towel;

“You gonna show me what you’ve got under that towel, Detective?”

“You ready for what i’ve got under this towel darlin’?”

Pushing yourself up to sitting, your legs spread and bent either side of him, you hooked a finger into the towel and tugged, your eyes going wide when you saw his thick meaty cock standing hard and proud between his muscled thighs. Wrapping your hands around it you relished the feel of his silky skin as it moved over the hardness beneath, your mouth against his;

“I need you inside me”

“I… Fuck… this wasn’t planned… i haven’t got any protection…”

“I’m on birth control, I want to feel you bare…”

With a growl he surged forwards, capturing your lips with his own before he pushed you down onto the bed. Holding himself up on one hand he hooked your leg up over his hip, opening you like a winter blossom as he rubbed his dick through your soaked folds, dousing himself with your slick wetness. You whined at the teasing, the way his tip would brush against your hole only to move up to your clit;

“Walter, please… you promised to warm me up from the inside…”

He paused, a smirk on his face;

“You want me to get you a coffee? ‘Cos i can stop…”

“NO, i need your diiiiiiiiii….FUCK!” He’d pushed into you as you were mid sentence, the feeling of his meaty girth splitting your walls wide open overwhelming you and your eyes rolled back in their sockets; “OH MY GOD!”

“You like that Darlin? You feeling warmer now?”

“Please… please fuck me…”

He grinned and shifted his hips, grinding into you;

“Well, as you said please…”

You had been expecting him to pound you into the mattress, you had not been expecting for his technique to start off with sensual rolls of his hips, filling you tenderly and carefully whilst you got used to his size. It was almost overwhelming, completely surrounded as he caged you in with his massive arms, his chest pressed against your own as his hips worked utter magic. He pulled his legs wide apart, shifting to rest on your open hips and he got even deeper. Pressing kisses to your lips and neck he soon had you moaning and begging for release, every push and pull hitting just the right spots and you were almost embarrassingly wet from the arousal but it only added to the sensations.

You could feel yourself coming, the pleasure too much to hold back, and with a long low moan your body betrayed you and succumbed to the orgasm that had been building in the pit of your belly. Walter kept up the same speed of his thrusts but pushed a little harder, a little deeper with each one;

“Can feel you fluttering around me, you gonna cum for me? You look so fucking beautiful all fucked out and wanting, feel so fucking amazing…”

Just as your orgasm was at its peak he tensed and you could feel his cum flooding into you, the twitching of his dick as he filled you with his seed prolonging your high. When you had both finally finished you could feel his weight start to get heavier on top of you, before with a sudden and surprising act of nimble dexterity he rolled the pair of you over so you were laying atop of him, his softening dick slipping out and you felt the trickle of his seed flow out of you. With one massive hand he pulled the duvet across your bodies, and you snuggled up to his chest;

“That was the best tip ever” you giggled; “In fact definitely more than the tip”

At that moment you not only heard but felt his stomach growl, looking up and seeing him grin sheepishly as he spoke;

“I just want you to know this is not how i usually treat food deliveries… do you want something to eat? Or drink?”

Nodding you smiled;

“That'd be nice”

A while later you were cleaned up, Walter having given you one of his massive t-shirts to wear which came to the tops of your thighs. He’d grazed through half the contents of his order as you nibbled on a muffin, having eaten at the coffee shop during a very quiet last hour of your shift. You’d laughed and chatted as the pair of you had eaten on the comfort of Walters couch, before you’d suddenly stopped mid sentence;

“Shit, i left my bike in the lobby… will it be safe there until i go home?”

Walter smiled at you, his hand curling around your thigh;

“Have you heard that weather out there? I’d be surprised if you could even ride it home through three foot of snow…” he paused for a moment; “Stay the night…”

You went to object, decline politely but you caught yourself, why? Why shouldn’t you spend the night? Taking a deep breath you smiled;

“I’d love to”

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Part 2 >>>

#walter marshall #walter marshall x reader #walter marshall x you #henry cavill #walter marshall smut #walter marshall fanfiction #walter marshall fanfic

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stay-midnight · 4 years

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Halloween of SKidz 1

Serial Killer! Hyunjin x MALE Reader

Word Count: 3.8K Words

This does not represent Hwang Hyunjin, JYP or any of the Stray Kids members and are only for fictional and entertainment purposes.

TW //: Explicit Smut, Murder, Blood, Reader’s death at the end, Angst and Death.

Kinks: HARD DOM! Hyunjin, WHINY SUB! Reader, Slight Exhibitionism, Toys (specifically a vibrator), Handcuffs, Orgasm Denial, Degradation, Marking, Spanking, Eating Out, Unprotected Sex (wrap it up), Creampie, Master Kink, Slight Nipple Play and Spitting.

Please ignore any grammar or spelling mistakes..

a/n: sksksks, This is my first work here on tumblr, It isn’t halloween yet but i’ll hopefully post 4 of these in this month while the other four on october. I’ll do one for every member and they’ll all be male reader cuz we need more of those uwu!

Laughter is echoing around the dark and empty road, the streetlights flickering on and off.

“99” the man named Hyunjin spoke in a deep voice as he pulled out the knife out of the person that stopped breathing seconds ago.

“One more, I just need to kill one more and I’ll reach triple digits!” he laughed out as he swung his knife, removing the blood from it.

He laughed as he looked at the body that is lying on the cold and hard road, still and unresponsive. He squatted down and poked the body with the edge of his knife, “Pathetic human, it wasn’t even fun trying to chase you, who knew someone could be as stupid as to go on a silent road, not even a car is passing by.” he mocked the dead human.

He sighed and got up from his squatted position, he placed his hands in his pocket and lifted his hood. Even just after killing someone, he already wants more bodies to hit the floor. He grins evilly, excited for his next victim.

You blink your eyes open as the sound of an alarm bounced around your walls. You groaned and tried to hit the alarm with your eyes closed.

In the end the alarm fell down, “That’s the fourth clock that I broke this month!” You whined out before sighing and picking the broken alarm clock and placing it in the trash bin near the door of your bedroom.

You rubbed your blurry eyes and walked to a side of the room, turning the knob and opening the door to the bathroom.

Sighing, “I have no classes today but I still have to revise for my finals..” You said to yourself as you opened the cabinet and you reached out to grab a toothbrush as you started to do your morning routine of bathing and eating breakfast.

. . .

Chewing on the bacon as you sat on your couch bored, you decided to turn on the tv as to see if there is anything interesting. Kid’s Cartoons started playing, you immediately switched it to the news channel.

“News just in: Another dead body was found this early morning.” The male newscaster started, you were perplexed as it was the 11th dead body this month and they haven’t caught the killer yet.

“Mhmm.. They were found dead with a cut that pierced through his heart but the blood was already dried out when it was found, the forensics recently said that they were killed atleast 7 hours ago, meaning that they were killed at about 1AM at midnight.” The female newscaster explained.

The male frowned, “We advise all of you to stay at your homes as much as possible until the killer has been caught.” He advised seriously.”

She nodded, “That’s all we have today for the case about the killings, sadly the police haven’t found that many evidences and the other towns lost the trail on the killer. We’ll keep you updated as best as we can, but until that, this is goodbye for now.” She finished and waved at the camera.

You sighed and closed the television, “Hopefully the killer gets caught soon.” You mumbled before taking a sip of your water.

You yawned as you entered the small cafe, the bell ringing. You blink away the tiredness in your eyes at the lack of sleep last night, the small cafe was seemingly packed and you heard murmuring around you, catching a few words like “killers” and “bodies”.

You walked over into the counter and squinted your eyes while looking at the menu. Nothing really caught your eye so you just went with ordering a Strawberry Cheesecake with a creamy cafe.

After taking your order, you walked into a corner and sat on a empty table there. You took out your laptop and started studying for your finals.

. . .

The once packed cafe is now mostly empty and deserted with only 4-5 people around.

You have been revising and studying for 2 hours already. You were struggling with some parts from Mathematics and Physics, you heard the hanging bell ring for the umpteenth time but of course ignored it again.

. . .

Hyunjin looked around and saw it a bit empty, he was planning to kill the cafe barista for annoying him last time but he wanted a special one for his 100th. He was about to leave until he saw a focused male at a corner of the cafe. He furrowed his eyebrows and walked closer to take a look, his mouth hung agape at your mesmerizing facial features.

He decided to take a seat in front of you, you were snapped out of your focused trance as an attractive stranger took a seat in front of you. “Uh.. There’s many seats around available..” you trailed, “I know.” he said in a bored tone,

“You seemed interesting so I decided to approach you.” he smiled and pushed your books to clear the table a bit. He placed his chin on his hand and studied you more, how cute you look focusing on your studies or how pretty you were thinking.

You sighed and closed your laptop, rubbing your tired eyes in the process. noticing the stranger in front of you with his gaze studying you. “Uh.. Hello?” You said, waving your hands in front of his face.

Hyunjin broke out from his trance and answered, “Hi..” he started, “What’s your name?” he asked boldly,

You were taken aback by his boldness and confidence seemed to flow in him. You slightly blushed, “[Y/N]” you answered, “A pretty name for someone pretty..” he smiled seductively at you while you blushed more.

“What about you? What’s your name?” You asked him meekly,

“My name is Hyunjin, pretty boy.” He winked at you suggestively. “Pretty boy? Really though?” You awkwardly giggled out.

“Of course, like I said you are really attractive.” He smirked looking at you, his finger drumming his cheek. “Well, you are too..” you smiled as you placed your laptop back to your bag.

“Mhmm~ In that case, would you like to get dinner tonight?” he asked grinning.

You contemplated for a bit before nodding slowly, “Can I have your number then?” he asked, grinning wider. You once again nodded “Sure..” You opened your phone and going to ‘Add Contact’.

You hand your phone over to him and smiled, standing up and grabbing your bag hoisting it over your shoulder, waiting for him to finishing inputting his number in it.

He hands you your phone, “Thank you Hyunjin? Or was it Hinjin?” You furrowed your eyebrows. He chuckled “It’s Hyunjin but Master sounds better.” He winked one last time and stood up to leave, leaving your flustered self standing there.

You were out of it on your way home that you hit your head on a street pole, it’s not really everyday that you get asked out by someone attractive.

You practically cheered when you arrive at your apartment then you heard your phone ding, you read the message and smiled. “Hi, pretty boy~ The venue for our date is the bar across the road from the cafe earlier, don’t be late tonight~ ;)” You giggled slightly at the wink emoji.

You responded with, “Of course, I won’t~ What’s with the wink emoji?

“I don’t know~ maybe we’ll do something after our date?~” he messaged back,

You blushed as you walk to your room and lay down bed, feeling the soft sheets and letting out a sound of satisfaction.

“Maybe?~” You flirted back,

“Aww, are you eager pretty boy?” he sent back,

“I’m not! Anyways let me get my rest so I have atleast enough energy tonight.” You heard your phone ring loudly which made you yelp and accidentally threw your phone into the air landing softly at your lap.

You gulped and answered it, “H-Hello?” you cursed under your breath at your stuttering.

. . .

He smirked when he heard your stuttering, “Pretty boy needs enough energy for tonight? What for?” he teased, thoughts of you riding him going through his head.

His tongue licking his bottom lip at his thoughts, He heard you pout through the phone, “N-Not for that, I need energy to converse with you and I’m tired from revising and studying.” You explained,

“For what? I didn’t say anything,” he chuckled, “Go to sleep then, you clearly need it for tonight.” he said, ending the call. You swear that you heard him smirk and that made you a bit aroused especially at his sexy tone of voice.

You sighed, setting an alarm, placing your phone at the nightstand and laying back down on the bed, thinking about the possibilities on what’s going to happen on the date.

You smiled, thinking optimistically. You fluttered your eyes closed, eventually falling asleep.

You blink your eyes open at the sound of the more soothing alarm sound than this morning, You checked the time and you still have 1 hour and 30 minutes to prepare.

You dragged yourself out of your bed and walked inside to the door at the corner of your bedroom.

You stripped yourself off your clothes and took a hot shower, feeling the warm water flow down to your chest and the bottom part of your body as you sigh at the calming sound of the shower.

. . .

You got out of the shower about 20 minutes and wrapped a towel around your waist, humming a tune. You walked out of the bathroom, checking the time. You still have 30 minutes. You got dressed in casual clothing, a blue t-shirt and tight jeans.

You arrived at the bar, you only brung a phone with you. You noticed that the bar was slightly empty possibly due to the fact that a killer is on the loose. You looked around for a tall and attractive male with a headband.

You spotted him at the corner of the bar and walked over to his table, “Hello pretty boy, on time I see?” he smirked, “Of course, It would be rude to arrive late..” you said shyly.

He hummed and asked, “Do you want any drinks?” he asked looking at you, you shook your head “I have really low alcohol tolerance so I’d prefer not to.” you said looking at him with a small smile.

He nods and stood up to walk over to the counter to order. You sat down and waited for Hyunjin to walk back as you played with your fingers, a bit nervous.

. . .

Hyunjin came back with 2 glasses of water and a pie, “Ooh~ What pie is that?” You asked smiling from ear to ear. “Pumpkin.” he said nonchalantly as he placed the food in front of you.

You hummed in approval and satisfaction of your order, You grabbed the fork and cut a small piece before placing it in your mouth, “It’s really good!” You said after swallowing it.

While the both of you are eating, you asked him questions as he asked you some as well and you got to know him better. “Do you have any deep dark secrets?” You asked looking at him with a small smirk,

He flinched and looked at you seriously, “You don’t hav—” You started, he cutted you off saying, “I don’t have any pretty boy, unless you count me wanting to do dirty things to that innocent body of yours, a deep dark secret.” he smirked leaning closer to you.

Your face immediately turned to that of a tomato and you fumbled around your words, “I- Uh-” are the only things that came out of your mouth.

“What is it hmm? Cat’s got your tongue pretty boy?” He teased, you felt a hand sneak on your thighs, rubbing and trailing it softly, seemingly getting closer at the middle of your legs.

You bit your lips as he kneads your thighs, which made you let out a breath shakily. “Are you liking this pretty boy?” You nod your head slightly and he noticed it. “Needy slut, you have no shame at all do you? I bet you wouldn’t mind if we get caught fucking in public.”

You let out a low whimper, “Answer me, you dumb slut.” He slaps your thighs which made you yelp from your seat, “I-I” was all you could say.

He clicked his tongue and grips your thighs harshly with his large hands.

“Do you want to leave now?” he smirks widely at you. “Y-Yes..” you stuttered out shyly but a sudden bad feeling arose on your stomach.

He chuckled and stood up, grabbing your hands and leading you out of the bar.

He leads you to his car at the parking lot and seated you on the shotgun seat.

He drives with one hand on the steering wheel and his other hand placed on your thighs squeezing and slapping it a number of times making you bite your bottom lip preventing those lewd sounds from coming out.

You still felt that bad feeling at your stomach, somehow telling you to leave and run but ignored it due to your spark of arousal and ignorance.

. . .

He parked his car at the front of his house, it was a small and cozy house at a very silent part of the neighborhood. You got out of the car and he did as well.

After getting out of the car, he walked over to you and dragged you inside his house.

As soon as you enter through door and walked inside his house, he closes the door behind him and pins you against a wall, his tongue slid on his bottom lip before kissing you against the wall roughly.

Low moans left your mouth and when you parted your lips slightly, he inserted his tongue forcefully, tasting every corners of your mouth as you gripped his shirt tightly.

He slapped the side of your hips signaling you to jump, you complied and jumped, wrapping your legs around his waist.

He pulled you off the wall and he made his way to his bedroom, keeping both your lips tightly locked.

Once you both arrive at his room, he placed you down the small bed and walked over to his closet. Grabbing a black box and looking at you lustfully. You sat up, blushing and eyed the box curiously, “What’s inside that?” You said and pointed at the box.

“Some interesting stuff..” he trailed off and looked at you smirking.

You watched as he pulled out a vibrator and handcuffs. You blushed redder as he pulled out those items but anticipating on what’s about to happen.

He walked over to you and placed the items on the nightstand. “Strip.” he commanded.

You nodded shyly before removing your shirt and tugging your pants off, leaving you on your boxers. He clicked his tongue, “All of your clothes.” he said in a deeper tone.

You shook your head, disobeying him. He growled before forcing you on your hands and knees on the bed, which made you whimper at the rough treatment.

“Dumb slut, can’t even follow simple orders, disobey me again and I’ll make sure you’ll never cum tonight.” he said to you as he handcuffed your hands behind your back.

“I’m sorry Hyunjin..” you said, he spanked you harshly through your boxers which made you release a loud moan. “Is that what you should call me?” he growled out as he spanked you again more roughly.

“M-Master..!” you moaned out loudly, “That’s my good slut.” he said smirking.

You squirmed a bit at your handcuffed hands behind you. “Don’t move, you slut.” he said as he spanked you again.

He pulled down your boxers roughly and licked his lips at the sight of your hole, he spat on your hole before placing his face between your cheeks and spreading it wider.

You were fully red at being exposed to him, “Ah~ M-Master f-fuck..” you moaned out loudly, echoing around the room.

He shoved his tongue down your hole and spreading your cheeks wider to go deeper while you let out a string of lewd moans at the feeling of his wet muscle exploring your walls.

You felt that you could cum any second but then he pulled his tongue out which made you whine. He flipped you over on your back, which made you a bit uncomfortable at the position because of the handcuffs.

He looked down at you and chuckled at your squirming, his eyes move from you to your hard cock, your tip angry-red. He jerked it you off slowly making you whine, “Go f-faster p-please..” you breathed out shakily.

He slapped your thighs again harshly, “Don’t speak unless I tell you to.” he said darkly, you whimpered at his tone of voice and closed your mouth.

You look up at him, still fully clothed. Which formed a pout on your lips, you wanted see all of him as well. He noticed the pout at your gaze. He unbuttoned his shirt and slipped it off him, revealing his well-toned abs which made you eye it like a candy.

He then unbuckled his pants and pulled it down, revealing a huge tent in the middle of his boxers which made you moan at the sight.

He chuckled and grabbed the vibrator off the nightstand. He then trailed the vibrator down your chest on the highest setting, which made you whine at the pleasure.

He placed the vibrator on top of one of your nipples, you let out a very lewd moan which turned on Hyunjin even more.

He then trailed it down even farther until it reached your cock, he placed it on the tip of your cock which made you scream at the pleasure, “M-Master~! T-That feels so good~” he saw your cock twitch which made him pull the vibrator away and smirking. “You won’t cum unless I want you to, you slut.” you led out the loudest whine which made Hyunjin smirk even wider,

“Cute. You look so cute like this, slut. So fucked out, I wanna hear you beg for me to let you cum and for me to pound into you like the cockwhore you are.” he said looking at you lustfully.

Hyunjin kissed you passionately with a slight hint of roughness. He pulled away and inserted his fingers into your mouth, you licked his fingers—swirling your tongue on it. Hyunjin pulled it out before reaching down and pushing a finger into your hole.

You moaned at the entry, clenching tightly around his finger. “Relax, slut.” he said, leaning down to kiss you to distract from his finger being inside you.

He inserted a second one which made you moan against his mouth. He inserted a third one immediately, fucking you at fast pace with his long and slender fingers.

You felt a coil at the pit of your stomach, “M-Master, I’m going to cum..~” you moaned out, muffled by his tongue being inside your mouth.

He pulls away from your mouth and stopped thrusting his fingers. “You’re not gonna cum until I do.” he strictly said as you whined loudly once again at your orgasm being denied a second time.

Tears formed in your eyes, looking away from him at your once again ruined orgasm, “Gonna cry now?” he smirked as he grabbed your chin, forcing you to look at him “Stupid slut, look at me when I’m talking to you.”

You looked at him, your eyes brimming with tears. “I’m sorry m-master..” you whimpered out,

He leans down to your right ear, “I said what I said, I’m gonna make you beg for me.” he whispered to you, biting the lobe of it.

You whined silently at this and nodded. “Now, Is my needy slut ready for my cock?”

“Y-Yes, m-master..” you stuttered out, “Beg for it.” he said, smirking again.

“M-Master, P-Pound into me like the w-whore that I a-am and f-fill me u-up with your cum.” you begged desperately.

He smiled, he lifted one of your legs and licked his lips once again at the sight of your needy hole clenching around nothing. “Look at your hole clenching, pathetic.” He said before slamming into you deeply, not giving you time to adjust before pulling out and slam back with as much force.

You screamed at his actions, clenching tightly around his cock. “M-Master!!!” you screamed out, squirming—trying to break free from the cuffs.

He repeatedly slammed into you, he found your prostate and hit it with every thrust as all you could do was let out screams and moans at the overwhelming pleasure.

“I’m c-close.. Please p-please let me cum~ Fuck~!” You moaned out. He groans and nodded, “Cum for me, pretty boy.”

You moaned loudly as your cum shot out to your chest and some reaching Hyunjin's chest.

He continued his harsh pace, overstimulation you, which made let out a loud whine at your hole and prostate being abused by him.

“Tell me how good I’m making you feel.” he groaned out. “S-So good m-master...” you gasped out as he hit your prostate for the umpteenth time.

His thrusts went sloppy, meaning he was close. You felt that familiar coil at your stomach. “I-I’m close again~..” you whined out as he leant down and placed some visible hickeys on your chest. “Cum with me.” he breathed out as he slammed into you faster and harsher.

You screamed as you came undone a second time, your body shuddering at your second orgasm. He came deep inside you a second later.

You moaned at the feeling of his cum staining your walls. He pulls out of you as he watch the cum drip out of your abused hole. You whined at cum dripping out of you but relaxed.

You blink twice, trying to blink away the tiredness but fell asleep as Hyunjin heard your light snores. He smiled but soon turned to a frown as he snapped back to reality.

He realized that you’re supposed to be his victim. “Just another hour atleast..” he was happy with you but he needed to kill you.

He turned you over slightly to uncuff you, he pulled the cuffs and placed them at the nightstand, next to the vibrator.

He got a damp towel and wiped your cum off his chest. He walked over to you and cleaned your own cum from your chest as he lifted your legs carefully to wipe the cum dripping out of your hole.

He laid right next to you and closed his eyes, sighing sadly as this was about to end.

He woke up at the middle of the night and got up, frowning. he grabbed a knife from the black box earlier and looked at you as he tried to calm his breathing down.

He walked over to you, “I’m sorry [Y/N]..” he said as he leaned down to give you a soft peck on the lips. He raised the knife up, his hands trembling “I’m really sorry..” he said as a single tear slipped down his cheek.

He brung the knife down to your heart and red stained his bedsheets. He sobbed silently because you’re the only one that made him feel that kind of way.

#kpop x male reader #dom stray kids #sub male reader #stray kids x male reader #skz imagines #kpop imagines #skz smut #skz dark hours #hwang hyunjin x male reader #kpop smut #halloween fic #x reader #lgbtq #mlm fic #x male reader #stray kids x reader #stray kids x you #subby hours

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singeramg · 4 years

Text

Ruin Me

Quick little reader insert imagine based off this post. Based off a non-ask...

*Update: Now a full length story! Check out Masterlist for my chapters?*

Pairing: CEO! Henry Cavill x Female! Reader

Rating: M

Warnings: Power imbalance, dom! Henry, sub! reader, fingering, dirty talk...

Song choice: Funny How Time Flies- Meshell Ndegeocello

PART 2 HERE

“ Y/N can you bring me a cup of coffee...please.”

His voice wasn’t raised but his tone told you all you needed to know.

He was not happy. Not happy at all.

He had called you from the phone in his office, not even bothering to call through the door or better yet come to the door himself which he usually did when he needed something from you and was in a good mood. You don’t dwell on it much and you get to your feet, and hustle over to break room to make a fresh pot of coffee.

It doesn’t take long; you wait the ten minutes to brew, taking note that your coworkers are packing up for the night. You look at the clock and realize you better do the same.

Although you have nowhere special to be the last thing you wanted to do on a Friday night was spend more time at the office. You didn’t complain much, the job wasn’t had for you. You hadn’t been with the company long but you were sure you liked it thus far.

You were Executive Assistant to the CEO of Cavill Industries. a company he started with his brothers years ago and had grown to be a world wide force. Henry Cavill may not have been the eldest brother but he certainly was the most determined and invested of the 5 and more so than any man you had met. This was why they made him the CEO.

You also thought that had something to do with the fact that he honestly was the best looking brother out of all of them.

The face of the company.

He had to stand out in a crowd, oh and Henry Cavill certainly did.

You could admit to no one but yourself that you had found him extremely attractive during your third and final interview where you finally got to meet him. If he wasn’t your boss, he would be exactly the type of guy you went for in terms of looks. Tall, dark curly hair, a jawline that could cut glass, dazzling smile and sharp blue eyes that seemed to pinpoint everything

Including any mistakes you made.

He had made adjusting to this new job hard for you.

Pointing out every mistake, forcing you to redo whole reports that people who got paid a lot more than you should have been doing

But nooooo

He ‘trusted ‘ a.k.a could hover over you while you fixed it.’ causing more late nights and overtime than you cared to think about.

Forget a social life, everything had to be about him.

You had to be everything.

In your job interview nobody had mentioned you would be basically in charge of his life.

Dry Cleaning, arranging his groceries to be delivered, you were even his dog walker on the days he brought his cute Akita Kal-El to the office.

Yea that was totally fun in the heels he forced you into everyday.

You had tried wearing respectable flats after your first week with sore feet and he vetoed that almost immediately.

Saying it wasn’t “seemly“ and that you were the assistant to the CEO and you should dress like it. Needless to say half of the time you wanted to slap him. The other time you were ridiculously turned on. I mean despite being an ass sometimes he played right into your masochistic streak. The way he spoke to you, wasn’t nasty but it had a very direct way that left no room for arguing or confusion. Just like with the heels. You normally would have argued your point, maybe even seen if he would come to some sort of compromise but you didn’t with him. You just kept the flats in your car and a pair under your desk for when you were sitting at your desk and for the days he was out of office.

That sort of sneaky was not like you at all. You just preferred to pull off the band-aid so to speak, but Mr. Cavill was not for any of that.

All you said to him when the response he wanted was obvious was a yes sir or no sir.

You made his coffee just as he liked two cubes of sugar, and a splash of cream. He always would like three extra cubes of sugar on the side, adding the extras depending on how his day had been going. The more sugar added the better his day. You walk as smooth as you can to his office, the large dark door. You don’t bother to knock, sliding open the door to his office, begging your heels not to catch on the floor. You sit his coffee on the desk, to his right, and far enough from his hand that he doesn’t accidentally knock it over.

You smooth out your black mid length dress, and try not to fidget with your red belt that gives a retro theme to the look, and you even had a red purse and red blazer to wear with it (which you had ditched mid-morning). You slip back out the door when he doesn’t look at you. You pick up the tablet you use to keep track of everything on a mobile basis. You pull up his calendar and head back into the large office.

The office itself had never intimidated you despite the large solid oak desk in the middle of the room. It felt open because of the floor to ceiling windows that had automatic curtains that came down on command. You actually loved his office despite the fact that you didn't spend a lot of time in it. You re-enter his office, and stand in front of the desk looking down at the calendar.

“Okay before the day ends I would like to go over your schedule for the weekend.”

He finally looked up at you, his blue eyes giving direct contact, that you couldn’t hold and went back to the glowing tablet, where the sun was starting to set outside.

“You have a dinner meeting tonight which starts at 6:30pm; a 30 minute commute time which means you need to be out of here in the next 45 minutes, if you would like to arrive with your 15 minute grace period as normal.”

He doesn’t say anything at first, then takes off the reading glasses off his face and tosses them on the desk.

“Continue.”

“ Not too many things on the agenda for this weekend except for family brunch on Sunday. Your mother requests you arrive on time this time.”

You regulate a smirk to the side of your mouth.

“I’ve arranged for a bouquet of flowers to be delivered to your house by 9am for you to take over there to her.”

“I don’t suppose I have any missed messages from today?”

You look at him confused.

“Ummm....no. Were you expecting a call?”

He sighs and rubs the temples of his head, clearly upset something.

“No...yes...don’t worry about it. You’ve already arranged for a car for me?”

Yep, he was upset and he was not about to share it with you. You didn’t press him, only prayed it didn’t result in a hell of a clean-up for you later. You had been the bad guy with no less than 4 woman, all of them glaring and spiting nasty vitriol at you when you wouldn’t give them access to Henry. You had seen them all come and go.

“Yes.”

He looks you over, getting to his feet, walking over to the door you knew to be an en-suite bathroom and keeping his extra changes of clothes.

“ Do you have any plans for tonight?”

He asks you suddenly and puts you on the spot. You don’t even have a lie to cover up how pitiful your life was, but you had to try. He didn’t need to know you don’t have anything planned tonight but a glass of wine and catching up on your TV shows you missed for all the overtime you’ve been working.

“Yes.”

“Like what?”

He asks almost immediately as if knowing you were lying. You had to try and get out of some crazy overtime he was known for. You didn’t want another late night in the office.

“Ummm...”

As noted earlier you didn’t think well on the spot. He raises an eyebrow at you.

“You know I don’t appreciate liars Y/N. Anyhow if you are done lying to me, the meeting for tonight requires a...feminine touch.”

“Feminine touch?”

You echo. He goes into the closet and you can hear him changing. You try not to think about him behind the wall.

“Yes. The people I am meeting with require a bit of finesse. The negotiations always go better when we bring our women to the meetings.”

“Soo... would you like me to call someone for you. I can have a dress sent over in their size to smooth the deal over.”

He laughs at you.

“No. Grab your things and call the car service to get here in 10 minutes.”

“ What stop the press? Are you putting me out of the office before you for once?”

You quip at him. He comes from around the corner his attire changed into a black button down shirt, left with the top few unbuttoned. He adjusts the sleeves and looks up with you.

“No you are going with me Y/N and we must hurry, you are going to require another dress.”

“But...”

“No buts. I need you and you are wasting time.”

He picks up a black suit jacket, his cologne hitting you with an umpf he walks by you to get to the car...

*********

The dinner had gone great from what you could tell. You saw a whole other side of Henry. One that was only observed under the rarest of occasions.

At least for you.

Overall you weren’t asked for much, Henry had bought you another black dress only this one was a bit more leggy than you were used to around such important people. Its spaghetti strapped and sweetheart neckline, offering way more cleavage than you would ever consider wearing around him, but Henry had literally come in with you, pulling it from the rack along with a few other choices and this was the tamest all the options he left you. You damn near had a panic attack in the dressing room. The women in the boutique had fixed your hair and makeup in the little amount of time you had, once again at Henry’s behest. You hadn’t be so pulled together since... well you couldn’t remember....

Henry had even been nice to you all evening, but you knew it was all an act, even if your body did respond to the compliments and lingering looks, the smile he would shoot you, he had even let his hands skim across your lower back.

You did your best not to read into anything. Had even gone along with the little game he was playing, being over sweet, playing with the curls on the nape of his neck, your hands lingering on his arms. Enough to suggest without being outwardly desperate and trashy. You were ever the smiling damsel to his associates, laughing at the jokes, ignoring the sexist comments about your dress or the ‘arm candy’ they referred to you as, despite it pissing you off.

You stayed to yourself most for the ride back to the office, and he stays quiet as well. Only then once the car parks do you realize in your haste earlier you left your keys upstairs. He insists he needs to come up as well to grab some files from his desk. You offer to bring them back down but he insists. You scurry to your desk, not finding them in the drawer where you usually kept your purse.

You don’t see them. You panic and look for them intensely.

Oh you hoped you didn’t leave them at the boutique where you changed dresses.

“Y/N. Could you come in here please? I would like to discuss something with you before you leave.”

He calls to you, the voice losing the soft tone he had with you all night, this only serves to make your blood run cold. Have you done something wrong? Said the wrong thing to the wrong person and cost him millions of dollars? You needed your job, and hoped pretty badly that this wasn’t the end of it.

You honestly couldn’t tell if you missed it or not. You disregard the thoughts you are having and push them back in your mind, offering to sort them out later. Preferably with alcohol nearby. You look into his office and see that he is standing behind his desk. Once you come in, thinking he needed something from you.

“Close the door.”

You close the door behind you, the lights on a dim shade, enough for you to see but not enough to over power your eyes.

“Did you need anything from me, because it’s late and I should be heading home...”

He surprises you by cutting you off in a tone that was even softer than any other time he had used with you before.

“I just wanted to say thank you for accompanying me tonight y/n.”

“You are Welcome. I’m just going to go...”

You smile and turn to leave but his voice stops you with a sharp tone that makes you freeze.

��Did I say you could leave?”

You feel your face get hot and you turn back around to face him. The lighting only showcasing the angles of his face, making you ever more nervous.

“No but Sir it's 12am...”

“I know what time it is. You are so stubborn all the time. Can’t even take a simple compliment.”

“I thought you were done.”

You shrug, and immediately regret being so nonchalant with him., his gaze intense.

“I wasn’t. Now before you interrupted me, I was saying thank you not only because you came with me but for playing your role so effortlessly. I didn’t expect you to be so ...reciprocating to me.”

“I figured that would be best. How would it appear if you showed up with a staff member we rather than a significant other like the other at the table.”

“Well your quick and astute observation saved me tonight.”

“All in a day's work. Now if I can just get out of these heels tonight and maybe into a pedicure tomorrow I will have made this all worth while.”

He surprises you by coming from behind the desk where he had been standing, coming to stand in front of you.

And you cursed yourself because it was back again.

The arousal you fought with every lingering look and touch he gave you tonight. How honeyed his words were with you, combined with the animalistic power you knew was just boiling under the surface.

“I have had many secretaries before and none of them take your position as seriously as you do. You put a lot of effort into your job and does not go unnoticed.”

Having him so close was unnerving. Especially when you had his direct attention. You can’t hold eye contact and look down at the floor. Henry touches your chin, his fingers tilt your chin up and you lock eyes. It wasn’t the first time you noticed the space of brown in his left eye, but the first time you were close enough to appreciate it.

You feel your pulse quickening.

“I don’t think I told you how beautiful you look tonight.”

He blinks slowly and you don’t breathe at all as his lips move toward your own. He is seconds away from kissing you, tension heavy in the room.

“Wait....Henry...I just...I Can’t go there.”

You say it out loud and it’s like someone let the air out of your balloon. He lets your face go and looks at you confused, for the first time you see just Henry. Not your boss, not the CEO who always had to be ‘on’ and in charge, you just saw Henry. His face was open and unguarded.

“It’s not that I don’t want you. It’s just you are my boss...”

Henry moves suddenly, and yet simultaneously time slows as he crashes his lips onto yours. The odd duality of soft, yet firm, calming yet passionate overtakes your mind and short circuits you. His hands are holding the side of your face on one side and behind your neck. His kiss steals what little breath you had away. You almost forget why this would have been such a bad idea but he pulls away.

“Darling, Didn’t anyone tell you? The boss makes the rules...”

He resumes kissing you and you offer little in the way of resistance as he picks you up, in fact you lock your legs around his waist and he deposits you on top of his desk. Everything you had been feeling for him was bubbling up in that moment. You were caught in being wanted to be treated like silk and wanting to toss him down and take exactly what you wanted in no uncertain terms of hatefucking him for all the jackass behavior he had exhibited since you started 6 months ago.

You slide his jacket off his broad shoulders, tossing it to the room, igniting the soft thud it makes when the expensive thing lands in a heap on the floor. He pulls your hips toward the edge of the desk and his large hands are hot as they slide up your skirt over trembling thighs and his lips move to your neck. He finds the sensitive spots there quicker than anyone ever had while also moving his fingers to play with your clit through the lining of the black lace panties you were wearing.

Your breath hitches in your throat and Henry grins against your lips, letting you take a second before he kisses you again. His fingers dance around before latching to the hemline and yanking them with enough force that they are torn from your body. Your hips sting from the pull, but you are more than turned on. You fumble with the buttons on his shirt, and don’t look at the skin revealed, but he doesn’t let you take it off him and instead pushes one of his fingers inside of you, you lewdly moan, and grasp his biceps quickly, having been taken off guard. It wasn’t that you weren’t wet, because you were plenty wet, your now ruined panties had been testament to that, but you had expected more of a playful teasing, but as one of your last coherent thoughts, you knew this man never wasted time.

He was a do-er...

And right now he was doing you. The amount of focus and precision he took in his work, pouring over contracts, logs, inventory and the like, he was putting in on you. As his finger moves in and out he is staring at you with such intensity you think you might explode.

“You are dripping baby girl. Melting right into the palm of my hand to be exact.”

He removes the finger that had been inside of you, raising it to his lips, tasting you from it, and you shudder. He kisses you again, you closing your eyes, then you hear in his deep tone like melted chocolate, luxurious to your ears,

“Open your eyes and suck them.”

He held two of his fingers and you opened your mouth. He wanted to hold your gaze.

“Get them nice and wet for me.”

You suck on them, imaging the girth that had been teasing you for months in his sacks, was what was actually in your mouth. You had wanted so badly to taste him and feel him you reach down, palming his obvious erection and you hear him growl. It was your turn to smirk, and as soon as he felt that smirk, he pulled his two fingers from your mouth and thrusts them into you.

You whimper and the one hand you left on his bicep clenched in, digging into his skin. His fingers glide in and out almost painfully slow. You need faster.You try to move your hips to make him move but he chuckles.

“That won’t work y/n. We do this at my pace. Be still or I will stop.”

He didn’t go any faster, his movements deliberately slow. You could tell he was getting a kick out this, and you whine again.

“Beg kitten.”

He whispers in your ear, his thumb teasing your clit again.

“Please.”

He moves a little faster.

“Come on love. You can do better than that.” Teasing.

“Please Henry...”

He slaps your thigh with a sharp tap and it sends the zing of arousal.

“That's not what you call me. Try again.”

While your brain is shorting out, you fumble on what he wants from you.

“I..i don’t know sir...”

He rewards you by speeding up more. Your torso drops backwards, your head follows as you rest back on your elbows, and legs move wider, making your dress bunch up around your hips.

“There you go. There’s what I was looking for. Now beg me to make you come.”

You worry your bottom lip, ignoring how your chest heaves, pulling against the black fabric of the dress.

“Fuck! Please sir please let me cum.”

“That’s more like it. Begging me like the dirty little slut you are.”

He speeds up, his fingers curling inside, tapping that spongy space that made your eyes cross and your vision blur. You didn’t think you would like being called a ‘little slut’ but it was more of a turn on than you had ever thought it would be.

“Sir let me cum please let me cum.”

His dexterous fingers speed up, his thumb rubbing your clit and you were glad no one else was in the office as your moans echo throughout the room.

“You want to be my good girl hmmm?”

You nod furiously, the edge of your orgasm coming up rapidly, as your walls begin their tell-tell sign of fluttering.

“Good girls wait until they have permission. You hold it.”

It was damn near impossible, but you try to focus on anything but how good his fingers feel. He pulls your body back up from the desk with his hand gripping behind your neck. His lips crash on your again, he lingers around your lips you breathe heavily against his lips.

“I’ll be your good girl!”

You yell.

“Good. Cum then come for me.”

It’s like the world goes silent and all you can focus on is his fingers as your orgasm pulls you under. It’s an out of body experience where you could hear your moans and groans of Henry’s name, where you were literally shaking, but you could bring yourself down. Destroyed, Henry is whispering praises in your ear. Calling you his and how good you were for him. It doesn’t take long to come back down, but when you do you feel wrung out, and as Henry pulls away, you notice the sheen of fine layered sweat on his forehead. You feel self conscious as he stares down at you, and without the haze of lust in your eyes it settles in you that your boss just gave you one of the best orgasms of your life and hadn’t even taken off his pants.

Pants that were currently begging you to be taken off. He begins to chuckle and you realize you’ve been staring at his cock outline, and he was laughing at you. He unbuttons his pants, and finally takes off his shirt the rest of the way, finally revealing the god sculpted body that he clearly worked for.

The look on his face says he is going to ruin you and you are going to like it.

Only then, as he begins to work on the zipper to your dress, do you look to your left on the desk and see your keys sitting there...

***************

A/n: Hope that was what you were looking for @thiccgeralt Hope this met your expectations and thank you!

I am thinking of coming back to this, but honestly I am waiting until @laketaj24 finishes her CEO! fic The Rules, because its so freaking wonderful and I don’t want to ruin anything by stealing any thunder with a CEO fic OR Ficlet I would plan on doing. BTW if you haven’t read The Rules then please do yourself a favor a go over to her page and check out all of her work. You will not regret a second of it....

However I am tossing this out to see if there would be any interest in a continuation of this fic. Let me know and as always thank you for reading, re-blogging, and liking!

Henry Cavill Taglist: (OPEN! Let me know if this is something you want on!

@msblkfire84 @magdelen69

#Henry Cavill #henry cavill smut #henry cavill x reader

711 notes · View notes

joonsmagicstudio · 3 years

Text

Meet Me Where The Waves Touches The Sky: funny things happen i guess? (V)

Note: I put a keep reading break but I am unsure if it is working, if there is no keep reading link then please let me know! I do not wish to bother anyone with long posts.

Story Description: We all have our issues, but some of us are sub-consciously pushing it away without realizing how deep under water we are. You don't realize the things around you aren't what used to be until you meet a celebrity struggling to live. Like the hypocrite you are, you help others without helping yourself first. But no one told you about helping others gives you this exhilarating feeling of being a saint. So for how long are you going to keep being a saint in a doctor's coat?

Genre: Angst, fluff (if you squint) and smut.

Pairing: You x Namjoon

Trigger Warning: It revolves heavily around suicide, depression and death. Please don’t read it if it is a sensitive topic for you. Also keep in mind it isn’t like ‘13 reasons why’. It takes place in more of an adult setting hence mature. It also has mature (+18) scene, alcohol consumption and occasional use of foul language hehe.

I am writing about suicide, death and depression not because I romanticize it or engage in it for others to partake. It is strictly for the purpose of writing a story to convey a message beyond these three words.

Story masterlist is here: MMWTWTTS

Ever since you clocked in for a night shift, working didn't help. Not even the recent news of Jungha's death was able to get your head out of the thoughts of your brothers. You ended up zoning out a lot, your co-workers had to keep snapping you out of your daze every time they found you staring at the hospital beds. They all brushed it off as you being slightly disturbed by Jungha's case, but that wasn't it. You just kept seeing faint and wispy images of your brother lying in a hospital bed weakly, but never failing to shoot you a bright white smile.

That infectious smile that was forever ingrained in your memories. You felt sick to your stomach that despite the fact that death was always near him, he still had it in him to smile. To be happy.

"Doctor Y/N." Wooyoung tapped your shoulder, pulling your attention to him.

"Huh-yeah? Something wrong?" You stitched your eyebrows together in concern at him.

"You are distracted today huh, I guess Jungha must have hit close to home. After all you disappeared after they were cleaning up her body." Wooyoung rested his hands on your shoulder in a comforting manner.

"Ah yes, I-I just feel that I failed to do my job." That wasn't a lie. Failure was something you didn't handle well and your failure was in the form of actual living beings rather than numbers on paper, rather than the number on the ranking for accomplishing something, rather than the finished products for presentation or others.

"I get that Y/N, but it's unlike you. In the past few years of knowing you, this is the most emotion I have ever seen from you," He breaks into a small fit of chuckles and a wide smile, "it's unusual, we are all used to seeing you have a stone-faced expression Y/N and I honestly feel that despite the situation being a grim one, it's a small improvement."

You knew Wooyoung meant well, but your expression of pain wasn't a means of improvement, it meant that you were going to reinforce the wall a bit more now. To you, there was no need for other people to read into you and know you, especially the traits that you particularly disliked to show.

"Why not just stay at home though? Take some time off? Plus my shift is ending soon." Wooyoung asked as he retracted his hands from your shoulder.

"Didn't feel like it, I don't mind working a bit more though. It keeps my mind off things I don't want to dwell in." You shrugged your shoulders. "I'll be in my office then. See you." You hurriedly turned around leaving him stranded in the hallway, you didn't feel like talking to him anymore and you felt guilty over that. You pushed the doors open to your office widely to step in, letting the door swing shut behind you and welcomed the lavender scented air that you had purposely placed there for it's soothing properties and to ensure your patients could ease a bit in the room.

Without hesitation, you strode over to your desk and stood in front of the desk, your palms pressed flat against your desk to support your upper body weight that was hunched over it. Your eyes were shut tight and lips were pressed against each other tightly as loose wisp of your hair hung over your forehead lightly. The only sound that was heard in the room was the soft humming of the ventilators fixed overhead in the ceiling. You really wished you could go back into time to change a few things, maybe notice some more things and maybe just implemented action then and there only. Maybe not realize things too late, or maybe just-just be a better person.

It all started with him, your eldest brother after all.

〰️ 💠 〰️

A few days had passed by, you managed to curb the thoughts of your brothers by throwing yourself into work and Namjoon had come by your place once again and the two of you were sitting on the couch in your living room in silence. Audible clicking sounds of the keyboard from your laptop and occasional sipping sounds from Namjoon's steaming hot cup of tea resonated in the room. Nothing much changed except that Namjoon kept asking you questions, questions about yourself and every single time you managed to dodge them or monotonously answer it, until he struck a chord with one particular question.

"Are you in touch with your family?"

It was a seemingly innocent question, but it bothered you.

"Can you stop fucking asking questions about myself?" You stilled for a second, before continuing to type away at your laptop, updating the information on the recent patients you interacted with recently in your office.

Namjoon was a bit taken aback by your reply, you had cursed at him. He knew instantly that family was a touchy topic for you and backed off knowing that it was probably the best if he stopped asking questions for now. This made him gain a small understanding of why there were no pictures in the house, it was because you weren't on good terms with them, well that's what he had assumed.

The guilt started eating you away the moment when you swore at him for asking a simple question and you couldn't take it any longer considering you were a person who cared so much about what other people thought since it was literally your job to do so.

"I am sorry, I didn't mean to swear at you Namjoon", you closed your laptop and pushed it to the side of your lap to give him your undivided attention. "It's just that I don't like being questioned nor do I like talking about myself."

Namjoon silently nodded, eyes trained on you as he sipped slowly on his cup of tea.

"As for my family, yes, I am in touch with them. I've got 2 brothers, I just don't live with them. They live in a house on the outskirts of Busan. I visit them when I have the time." You felt that at least giving an answer to the last question would compensate for your inappropriate outburst at Namjoon.

"Oh, that's nice." That new information almost immediately squashed the idea in Namjoon's of you being on bad terms with your family members. Namjoon didn't know what else to say because he was a little too scared to proceed with the conversation with you. You sensed that, so you decided to ask him.

"What about your family?"

"M-my family?" He sputtered on his tea, he hadn't expected you to keep the conversation going on, "Well they are good, I've got a younger sister. I just haven't been in much contact with them because I'm busy lately and I-"

"You are a celebrity, it's understandable. I'm sure they will understand why you couldn't visit them." You interrupted him, every celebrity you've encountered had a more or less similar issue, family. At least they had a family waiting for them.

"Yeah, you are right. I hope they do." Namjoon looked down in his cup of tea, his shoulders sinking in. You made a mental note to yourself that his family was also playing a role in his stress lately.

"Is there any issue other than distance and lack of time with your family?" You asked, tilting your head slightly at him.

"Well, not really, I just feel guilty for not spending time with them." Namjoon mumbled his reply.

"You should go to them, kind of obvious but what you are missing is the actual confirmation from their mouth that they understand you that you can't visit them." Namjoon looked up at you at last, setting his tea in his lap, "Correct me if I am wrong but you haven't spoken about this with your family, you haven't told them that you were really busy nor have you heard from them that it's okay and they understand it?"

Namjoon couldn't help but let out a painful chuckle, you had hit a dead spot-on the cause of his troubles. He hadn't realized that he never heard it for himself from his family that it was okay and you had made him realize that right now. You took his painful chuckles as a yes.

"Well, I guess it wouldn't hurt to pay them a small visit today Namjoon." You stood up and grabbed his mug after glancing to see if it was empty and took it to the kitchen, leaving him to dwell in his own thoughts and on your words.

"Would you come with me?"

You whipped around. You were surprised to hear him ask for your accompaniment but didn't show it on your face, "Me to come to visit your parents?" You repeated what he had said to double-check if he asked correctly.

"I mean you don't have to but it would give me some kind of support I guess."

You pondered over it, torn between going so you could give him some support or that you should stay behind and let him do it independently. The latter is what a therapist would have done and you decided to go against that. But then you already violated the rules since the beginning and no one noticed. By now you didn't know how many rules had you bent and broken.

"Sure, if it helps you." You shrugged your shoulders.

〰️ 💠 〰️

You had offered to drive the two of you to his home in Seoul, it wasn't too far and plus going by train would be difficult since he's the celebrity. Your car wasn't too bad considering you earned a lot as a psychiatrist in the hospital and of course you worked over time with intentions of earning more so you weren't too embarrassed or affected by taking a celebrity in your car.

The ride to his place was fairly quiet except for soft music playing over the radio and the constant hum of the engine and roadway noise. You glanced occasionally at Namjoon, he simply was fixated on staring outside the window, watching everything pass by him fast. He was busy in his own thoughts and you didn't want to disturb him so you let him be until the two of you pulled up by his house.

"Ready?" You unbuckled your seat after switching off the engine. There wasn't any audible response except for a small nod. It wasn't a confident nod. You were quick to react upon that.

"Namjoon, if you aren't ready, no worries we can go home. You can always do this next time when you are more confident."

"No it's fine, I'd much rather get it done now than to keep pushing it. It'll give me proper relief as you had said." Namjoon replied back meekly, as if he was trying to gather the courage for himself.

"Alright, that's good, listen, it'll be difficult but I'm here alright? Do you want me to come inside or wait here?" You rested your hands on his shoulder in a reassuring manner, you didn't want to make him feel pressured nor forced. That generally never worked out well.

"Well, just walk me to the door, you don't need to come inside." He opened the car door and stood outside in the cold, fresh air of Seoul, taking in a huge breath and exhaled sharply. You followed his actions too and locked the car before shoving your hands along with the key in the pockets of your coat.

"That I can do." You gave him a small smile and walked towards the wooden door of his parent's place, the front yard of the house was decorated with bunches of small flowers such as petunias and some unknown generic colourful plants you saw everywhere but never knew what it was called and the small patches of grasses were well trimmed. When you stood in front of the door, you didn't press the doorbell but instead you urged Namjoon to take the initiative. After all he was the one that needed to talk to them, not you.

Few seconds upon ringing the doorbell, an older woman with an apron tied around opened the door, this was unmistakably Namjoon's mother as you saw her. Her eyes sparkled, her mouth stretched into a motherly smile in a fraction of seconds she set her eyes on her son, Namjoon. Anyone could see that she loved her son dearly. All mothers would for their child, with of course some exceptions.

"Namjoon-ah, what brings you here my son?" She lets go of the door handle and takes a step towards Namjoon to bring his face in her hands, she didn't notice you nor greet you but that didn't bother you since it meant that she hadn't seen her son in ages. Namjoon didn't respond but kept looking at his mother, he was slowly losing his courage to actually have the talk with his mother, so you decided to leave him with no choice but to just do it.

"Mrs. Kim, it's a pleasure meeting you." You bowed slightly and pulled out your hand from your coat pocket to greet her, "I'm Namjoon's psychiatrist and I came with him today so that he could talk to you about some things that have been bothering him lately. I thought it would be good for him and I'm sure you would also agree with me." You glanced at Namjoon briefly and he looked like a child who was uncomfortable stuck in a conversation between his parents and teacher as if he had done something bad. "I'll take my leave now and let the two of you discuss it out." You bowed again to his mother and gave Namjoon one pat on his shoulder, "I'll be in the car when you are done." You whispered before heading back to the car, leaving the mother and the son to enter the house. You hoped that Namjoon would talk about it and get it sorted out soon, it would at least mean that one issue is gone and he has got one less problem to worry about.

〰️ 💠 〰️

3 sharp knocks against the car window was good enough to snap you out of your little nap session, the sun had already set and the lamplights were glowing brightly as if they were trying to banish the darkness within the area. Just how long had it been since Namjoon entered his house?

You looked out the passenger window to find Namjoon smiling in a more carefree manner, the talk must have gone well. You couldn't help but smile back too and unlock the car door for him to enter.

"I take it that it went well with your parents?" You watched him buckle up and set a white plastic bag comfortably on his lap.

"It did, thank you Y/N. I really needed that and you made me realize it. They understood my situation and said it themselves that it was okay." He spoke happily like a 6 year old telling their mom what happened at school today.

"That's good to hear. What's with the bag though?" You asked as you pulled out onto the streets leading back to the highway.

"Ah, this? Well, my mom was just a little bit concerned about me not eating properly so she made me take some packed home-made food for the dorm and our members. That's why it took so long because she prepared everything from scratch. I hope it didn't cause you any inconvenience." He patted the bag softly.

"Nonsense, getting home-made food from your mother is hardly an issue." You replied back monotonously. Things like this didn't bother you much since at the end of the day you knew that Namjoon would go back home feeling better, that's all that really mattered.

"My mother also made you something small, I didn't know what you liked so she packed a small box of Kimchi for you. Kimchi is her specialty so I hope you'll like it."

"That's-that's really sweet of your mother. Please do tell her thanks from me then." You were rendered silent for a second, you never really had home-made food since your parents passed away, all you ever ate was crappy ramen that Seonghwa made or just some convenience store packed meal. The two of you fell into a comfortable silence for the rest of the car-ride.

Later in the night, Namjoon bid you goodbye and headed off to his dorm, the small box of Kimchi laid on the seat where he sat moments ago looking cold and almost sad.

You didn't feel like eating it and that felt like being the biggest asshole on earth.

Back at the flat, you contemplated what you were going to with a small box of Kimchi. The food couldn't go to waste so you put the kimchi in a disposable box at the apartment and left Namjoon's box by the sink to wash and return. What were you doing to do with the disposable box of kimchi? You were going to give to someone you thought was more deserving of it than you were. The homeless, the ones who were struggling to get some food to eat..

The disposable box with the kimchi with a heapful serving of rice from your flat was later on given to one of the homeless person living in a poverty ridden area of Seoul. You normally would feel a small sense of gratitude for giving a homeless person a small side-dish to eat but you felt even worse, maybe because you were essentially giving away a home-made food made by a mother with care and love for you only, to someone else.

You definitely didn't deserve any home-made food.

〰️ 💠 〰️

Despite seeing Namjoon a few days ago regarding the parent issues, your mind was still occupied by what more problems you could find within Namjoon. You wanted to fix him as much as you could even though he wasn't officially your patient. You were unintentionally giving him more priority over the severely ill patients but that was because you saw something familiar but new in him. Familiar as if he reminded you of someone from the past and new because it was a different person, different face, different status in the society.

You knew for sure he had a camera issue, splitting his celebrity persona from the real persona. He had issues with his fans in terms of just wanting to go out and not getting bombarded by flocks of fans, but that one was something you couldn't do much about, it was inevitable, it was something that came with the package of being a celebrity.

You were distractedly looking through your schedule for the following patients in the next few days on your laptop. Your chin rested in your left palm as you hunched over the table and mindlessly kept scrolling through until a soft vibration pulled you out of your thoughts about Namjoon, a notification popped up on the screen, it was from your brother, Hongjoong.

'Wanna come over for a night? I know you have work tomorrow, but let's spend some time tonight!'

You rolled your eyes at the message, he knew that you still had work tomorrow and even going by a high-speed train, it would take approximately 3 hours, however your first patient tomorrow doesn't come until 11 AM...It seems possible to go. It's been a while since you had dinner with him anyways. It was 4:30 PM right now, so you grabbed your coat off the coat hanger and bags in a haste, the soonest train you could catch was at 4:50 PM.

'Alright Joongie, but I leave at 7 AM sharp.'

You sent a quick message before boarding the train, you managed to buy the tickets in a nick of time so you were a little out of breath. It didn't take you too long to find a seat by the window and sit down before the train started. Few seconds later, your phone vibrated, that must Hongjoong you thought.

'Yes! I'm so happy my lil sis is coming for dinner at last! Shall I make your favourite ramen?'

You chuckled softly, the two of you had a small ongoing joke over instant ramen, more specifically Seonghwa's ramen.

'Haha very funny, I still want Seonghwa's ramen.'

'Eyy how could you like that ramen? He keeps forgetting to put the flavour while the water is boiling, not when everything is done!'

'Crappy Seonghwa's ramen still is the best!'

'Alright alright, I guess we will be eating some take-out tonight.'

'Huh? Seonghwa isn't home yet?"

'Nope, this idiot is working overtime.'

'Again...?'

You sighed disappointedly, and sent back another text confirming the plans the two of you had made.

'Alright, I'll be home at 8 PM!'

With that note you tucked your phone away and laid back in the train seat, the headphones over your ear playing music loud enough to drown the soft chattering of other passengers and the rumble of the engine working at high speed. Staring outside the window as the scenery blended into one constantly changing motion picture that made you feel that you were breezing through life without ever having some sort of control over it.

〰️ 💠 〰️

The salty aroma of soy sauce along with familiar grease in the chinese take-out and the sounds of soft creaky wooden floorboards welcomed you home in Busan.

"Y/N! Is that you?" Hongjoong head stuck out from the living room door.

"No, it's me, God." You dropped your bag and coat to the side of the entrance hallway.

"That is so overused and not funny anymore." Hongjoong warmly smiled and walked up to you to engulf you in a warm bear hug. You sighed contentedly, closing your eyes and snuggled your head into the crook of his neck, "How have you been Y/N?" Hongjoong asked, softly caressing the back of your head before pulling away.

"Just so-so Joongie." You wrapped your arms around his arm as the two of you headed towards the living room where a considerably large-sized plastic bag laid atop of the table, containing all sorts of Chinese take-out Hongjoong chose.

"Well, I'm sure it will get better, whatever is bothering you, it'll go away eventually." Hongjoong handed you a pair of chopsticks as he pulled out few boxes of noodles.

"I guess so, like you for example, you are recovering now." You fell back into the couch in the living room and took the first bite out of the noodles. Hongjoong too sat down and opened up his take-out box, "Yeah I guess, I am recovering, the cancer is gone now." He swirled his chopstick in the box of the noodles, not taking a bite yet. That went unnoticed by you as you were too busy inhaling the noodles, after all travelling made you incredibly famished sometimes or maybe just eating with the family was better than eating alone.

"But, aside from that. Something else is bothering me." You stated, mouthful of noodles which made you look like a chipmunk for a moment.

"What is?" Hongjoong rose one of his eyebrows at you, urging you to proceed with what was bothering you.

"It's Seonghwa, Joongie."

"Not this again, you know Seong-" Hongjoong sighed sharply as his mouth opened slightly, tilting his head in a full circle before he took a good look at you.

"No, I mean like I am working now, I am earning well. I am able to support all of you aren't I? So why won't he just stop working?" You set down the empty box of the noodles and set the chopstick next to it on the table.

"Y/N, Seonghwa wants to work, let him-"

"Why? There is absolutely no sense in him working his ass off when he could have gone to University ages ago! It's been several years and he keeps working part-time, even when you got better and I started working." You interrupted your brother, you rarely interrupted your brother but this time it was getting ridiculous to hear Hongjoong constantly defend your elder brother over this matter. You guys have had arguments this many times and it always was Hongjoong defending Seonghwa. You couldn't quite grasp the idea of your eldest brother constantly over-working despite things being financially fine now.

"He should have gone and completed his university, it was his dream to become a nine-to-five office worker. He had that chance and now it's too late, you too, I finished university and the two of you could still apply for late admission." You were borderline spitting words at your brother, watching him become uneasy at your anger, it wasn't like you to get angry anyways.

"What is done is done Y/N. Just let it be. Maybe he likes working these kinds of jobs more than doing office work." He sighed, shoulders slumping down. You had nothing to say anymore, he still kept defending him for continuously working and you gave up. At least you respected his determination and tenacity to constantly defend Seonghwa.

The two of you sat in an uncomfortable silence that had steeped in after your small burst out. You glanced at his uneaten, now cold box of noodles, "Aren't you going to eat? You still need to eat Hongjoong."

Hongjoong simply closed the take-out box and pushed it further away from him on the table, "Look Y/N, I just wanted to have one simple dinner with you. No arguments or anything, but that seems too difficult for you I guess. I'm not that hungry anyways, the chemo messed up my appetite these days." Hongjoong stood up, clenching his teeth slightly in disappointment at you as his eyes bore tiredly into your head.

"I understand Joongie," You tried using his nickname to coax him a bit, to soften the atmosphere you had ruined, "Please at least eat something, I get it the chemo messed you up, but you are getting skinnier even though the chemo is over now. You are much more skinnier than I saw you last time. You need a bit of food in your system."

"You see, the way you are supporting and helping me, why don't you do the same for Seonghwa huh? Why not go visit his workplace and check on him, or see if he is eating well instead of coming here and ruining some time together by ranting about the past?" This time it was Hongjoong's turn to get angry. You were rendered silent by his words, you didn't say anything back because deep down, you knew he was right. As a sister, you should have at least been supportive of what Seonghwa is doing and at least check up on him whenever you were in the area.

"I'm off to bed. Sleep or go home, I don't care. Do whatever you want." With that, Hongjoong turn on his heels and walked back to his room in a solemn manner. The sounds of the creaky wooden floorboards got farther and farther away until you heard the door close, effectively ending the noise from the floorboards.

Guilt and regret coursed through your body as you gingerly cleared the food and chopsticks away to avoid disturbing Hongjoong from whatever he may be doing in his room. Then a small, but clear sound of light clicking off told you that he went to bed, without wishing you a goodnight. That hurt deeply even though it wasn't anything major.

〰️ 💠 〰️

You laid in your bed of your old bedroom in that house in the darkness, constantly shifting due to restlessness and uneasiness of today's conversation between Hongjoong plaguing your mind. If you had kept your mouth shut and enjoyed the meal, chattered about useless and miniscule stuff, maybe then the two of you could have been watching a movie together late in the night to wait for Seonghwa to come back home so it would haven't ended everything so abruptly. Your throat had gone dry from being awake for hours and a pounding headache came like an unwanted guest, so you went to the kitchen to grab a glass of water.

"Y/N?" A familiar husky voice called out your name, it was undeniably Seonghwa. Why was he back home at 4 or 5 am? Well, when is he not back at that time.

"Seonghwa, you came? Why so late though?" You turned around, gulping down the glass of cold water which quenched your dry throat.

"The convenience store, my shift was till 4 am." He walked up the sink and stood by your side to fill up a glass of water for himself.

The need to ask him why was he still continuously working so late built up again, you didn't want to upset him, especially when he came late and is definitely dead tired.

"You want to ask me something Y/N. Go ahead, I can feel it whenever you want to ask, there's no point keeping it to yourself." Seonghwa braced himself mentally, he had a gist of what you were planning to ask him, it was pretty much the elephant in the room, one way or the other, someone was going to have to address it. It would be more surprising to Seonghwa if you didn't ask about it.

"Why do you still keep working, that too ridiculously late when I can do this for all of you?" You blurted out, eyeing Seonghwa cautiously for any signs of irritation. Only thing you picked up was a deep and long sigh.

"I've told you before, I want to keep doing this. I want to keep earning for all of us."

"But I am earning now, you could have gone back to university and have gotten that job you have always wanted." You mused, you still hadn't grasped why he kept doing this, it seemed completely inconvenient to you.

"I get that, it's logical to you, but I don't mind doing this. I like doing this Y/N. I like working various activities till I am exhausted."

"So, you like this better than the office job?" You asked hesitantly, you weren't so keen on accepting his reply as an answer to his actions.

"Yes, I do Y/N. Funny things happen I guess. Just leave it for now, will you?" Seonghwa patted your head, much more half-heartedly than he used to a few years ago and more out of habit, initially that bothered you but then you eventually accepted it. It seemed like this was the best you were going to get for a long time now that the relationship between the two of you had soured beyond repair. It wasn't just the issue of him working late that got in the way of the two of you, there was so much more that had yet to be resolved.

With that, you were left alone in the kitchen, in the darkness. Sounds of the creaky floorboard faded away just like Hongjoong and the door closing ended it all.

Well that family reunion went well.

#kpop fluff #kpop angst #kpop imagines #bts #bts imagines #ateez fanfic #ateez x reader #kpop #namjoon fic #namjoon x reader #namjoon imagine

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emotchalla · 4 years

Text

Tempt You - V.

A/N: HELLO so I never thought I would finish this fucking part like I had all the ideas I just could not execute it??? I’m convinced this is still shit but I really wanted to post it, so here you are bbs! Quarantine has not given me that much inspo, unfortunately, but the sun has been out recently and I was motivated to get some writing done. ALSO, I just found out that Isiah’s name is actually Isiah and NOT Isaiah??? Like I just thought they pronounced it weird on the show bc Brummie accent but NO, that boy’s name is just Isiah. I’m so fucking shook lmao. ALSO ALSO, he’s a very hard character to write (pls be gentle!!!) because Stephen Knight literally gives us N O T H I N G and I could rant about how underutilized he is for DAYS but y’all did not come here for that! Enjoy the smut bbs!

**All my works are written with a Black or POC reader in mind, because I am one myself, but all readers welcome!**

Pairing: Modern!Michael Gray x Fem!Reader

Summary: You meet Isiah, Michael’s best friend. After a night of dancing and rounds of shots at the bar, you invite Michael back to yours, and well...

Warnings: Swearing, Alcohol use, gratuitous Isiah flirting (I’m sorry; I love him!!!) NSFW content (fingering, oral [f receiving], protected sex, dirty talk, light choking), soft Dom!Michael x sub!reader, Fluff (he really likes you, so he’s sweet)

Word Count: 8.4k+ (I actually died while writing this and resurrected just to upload. You’re welcome.)

series masterlist | main masterlist | add yourself to the taglist here | listen to “tempt you (evocatio)” here | find the spotify playlist here

**GIF not mine**

The next two weeks pass as if they’ve really been no time at all, and it’s mostly due to the strides you and Michael have made in your relationship. Things aren’t official yet, and you try to not let it annoy you. You know that he’s busy; he called a few days ago to update you with the news that his client was in fact being framed, and he and the team had been able to break their witnesses just by cross-examining them. You knew he was intimidating, but this was proof on a completely different level. When you told Michael this, he told you that one of his cousins told him the only reason he’d been given his law license was because he scared the shit out of the test administrators for his LPC. You told him that said cousin was a genius, and he grumbled something about how of course you’d like fucking John, and you launched into your relentless teasing.

It was the first time the two of you had been able to do more than text since your special night. Not only was he busy with work, school was kicking your ass and your audition was right around the corner. Regardless, you both found ways to talk to each other. You kept up with the daily pictures, most of them tame, and when Michael had a spare minute away from the courtroom, you’d check in about your days. It was as normal as things could get for now, and while it sucked to not see Michael for a month, you knew the reunion would be worth it. He’d promised you as much.

It’s Friday night, Michael’s just won his case, and you’ve invited him to go dancing with Savvy and a guy she’s seeing. When Michael imagined a night with you—celebrating his big win and getting to see you for the first time in a literal month—he wasn’t imagining going out to a club and dancing the night away. Michael doesn’t dance. When he was younger, he was too busy snorting coke in the alleyways behind pubs to bother with the dance floor. He didn’t even dance at Tommy’s wedding. But Michael can’t say no to you. He tries to exercise restraint, he does, but there’s a part of him that likes giving you whatever you ask as soon as you ask for it. So dancing it is.

He wishes that if he had to take you to a club, it could be one that John or Isiah owns. At least he knows the environment, the people. He can blend in because their clubs are full of people he knows. It’d be nothing to sneak off with you and make good use of one of the VIP rooms. In a club run by, well, anyone else…Michael has to be on his guard. He doesn’t have control of what photo snapped in a dark corner ends up in some gossip mag’s inbox come Monday morning. The media follows the Shelbys and their progeny like vultures. Michael isn’t ready to expose you to that. Not yet. So maybe he might’ve asked Isiah to spontaneously visit from Birmingham and “happen to turn up” at the same club you’ll be at tonight. If you’re up for it, he’ll introduce the two of you. He knows you’ll get on immediately.

“Y/N, if you don’t fuck that man tonight I’ll be so disappointed,” Savvy says as she examines your reflection in the bathroom mirror. “You look so fucking good.”

You grin at her as you set the last curl in your hair. Nights that you went out were few and far between, so you tended to go all out when you had the chance. The dress you’ve chosen for the night is actually one of Savvy’s that she insisted would look better on you. It hugs you in all the right places, and your boobs look good. Some of your favorite moments with Michael so far have been ones where you’ve made him speechless, and you can’t wait to do it tonight.

“Oh I don’t know if we’ll go that far, Sav,” you shrug, barely believing yourself.

If Michael gave you the chance, you were going to take it.

“Bullshit! The man bought you lingerie and sex toys.”

“Just because he did all of that, it doesn’t mean he’s gonna wanna fuck tonight.”

“He’s absolutely going to want to fuck tonight.”

“Just because you’re always thinking about sex, doesn’t mean everyone else is!” you giggle, watching as Savvy’s jaw drops in fake indignation.

“Now listen here, bitch!”

You both giggle as you turn back to the mirror—you to finish your hair, and Savvy to apply her lipstick. The night had already started for the two of you; while visiting her sister in Paris, Savvy had gotten used to having a glass of champagne while getting ready for their nights out. She insisted that the two of you carry on the tradition. Your head is already starting to float, and a warmth has settled into your skin. Tonight will be a good night. The doorbell rings, signaling Oliver’s arrival. Oliver dances in the same ballet company that Savvy does, and they’ve started seeing each other. You like him well enough. He’s charming, good to Savvy, and incredibly fun to party with.

The club you’re going to is right around the corner from where you live, so you’re having Michael meet you there. He’s had a hell of a month, and you want tonight to be a night where he can unwind. Although he’d won the case, he had a massive pile of work waiting for him in the office, so it’d be a bit before he could join you.

“I’ll go get Oliver. You finish up in here,” Savvy says, throwing you a wink over her shoulder as she leaves the bathroom.

You nod, and return your gaze to the mirror. Maybe Savvy is right about tonight. You’re tempted to snap a picture of your outfit to send to Michael, but you decide to let him be surprised when he sees you. You plan to drive him as wild as he’ll let you. If that means all the way…well, you’re ready to make this night worth it. Savvy’s giggle comes from the living room as she laughs at some joke Oliver’s just said, and you smile to yourself. She deserves to be happy.

You take one last look at yourself in the mirror before grabbing your phone and leaving the bathroom to join Savvy and Oliver.

“There she is!” Oliver greets, giving you a warm smile as you enter the living room.

“It’s good to see you!”

You give him a quick hug before he pulls away to give you a once-over. He nods, grinning at you.

“You two didn’t come to fuck around tonight, aye? You look fantastic, Y/N.”

You giggle, knocking your shoulder with his.

“Have I told you lately that you’re my favorite person Savvy’s ever dated?”

“You tell me every time you see me, but that doesn’t mean I ever want you to stop. I love the validation.”

“You sure Savvy’s the Prima ballerina and not you?”

Oliver cracks up, and soon you’re laughing with him. Savvy rolls her eyes in fake annoyance, grumbling to herself about how much she wishes you hated Oliver, so you wouldn’t talk so much. You all know she doesn’t mean it; she couldn’t be happier that two of her favorite people are fond of one another. It makes her feel like this can really go somewhere.

“Come on,” Oliver says, turning to wrap an arm around Savvy’s waist. “Let’s get out of here while you two have control of your limbs.”

Savvy’s the one to mouth off to him this time, and you shake your head as they begin to tease each other back and forth. It’s still warm enough outside that you don’t need a jacket, but you drape one over your shoulders just in case. You chat idly with Savvy and Oliver on your walk to the club. Still, your thoughts are entirely elsewhere. You can’t wait to see Michael tonight. It’s a bit strange to have moved so quickly, but you also find it exhilarating. Michael is unlike anyone you’ve ever met, and it makes him the most interesting man in the world.

There’s already a line starting to stretch around the corner when you reach The Lilac Room. Oliver whistles under his breath.

“It’s usually never this bad. Maybe someone’s making an appearance.”

You and Savvy both shrug as you follow him toward the large black doors lined with lavender UVs. He nods toward the bouncer, who immediately smiles at him in recognition. Another perk of Savvy dating Oliver? His older brother owned a series of nightclubs all across the city. Any time the two of you wanted a night out, you had your pick of venues, free drinks, and enough security personnel who knew who you were connected to to ensure that you had a night of stress-free dancing. No creepy men trying to buy you drinks and convince you to head back to his flat for the night. Just pure, uninterrupted fun. It made you wish you had more time to actually go out.

The moment you’re inside the club, you’re itching to make a beeline for the illuminated dance floor in the center of the room. Savvy and Oliver steer you toward a VIP booth instead, where a waiter is already waiting to take your drink orders.

“Why are we sitting? We came to dance!” you whine as Savvy urges you into the booth with a nudge of her hip.

Oliver merely chuckles before leaning over to the waiter to order your first round of drinks for the night. Mojitos for you and Savvy, a finger of scotch for Oliver, and for Michael—

“What do you think your guy would like, Y/N?” Oliver asks, a slight twinkle in his eye.

You think he and Michael will get along quite well. Sadly, you don’t know enough about Michael to know his favorites, but he told you during some late night phone call or another that on really rough days, he’d lock himself in his office and nurse a bottle of whiskey. His cousin Tommy’s, if he had it. As long as it could get him drunk, he wouldn’t complain.

“Whiskey, neat, I’m thinking,” you tell him, and Oliver’s face breaks out into a grin.

“I like him already,” he says, before turning back to the waiter.

You turn toward Savvy.

“I think he and Michael are gonna get along a little too well,” you sigh.

She nods.

“I think Ollie’s gonna like your boy more than you do.”

You share a laugh before Oliver comes back over.

“If you two want to check out the dance floor now feel free to. I’ll wait here for the drinks.”

Savvy leans over to give him a quick kiss.

“You’re the best,” she murmurs against his lips, and you don’t miss the way Oliver’s eyes sparkle when they look at her.

Savvy grabs your hand then, and you both head to the dance floor. Almost immediately, you’re surrounded by a group of other dancing bodies, and you feel the stress of the past month give way with every thump of the bass. You can lose yourself here. You and Savvy quickly fall into your usual pattern, bodies moving along to the music steadily pumping through the club’s speakers as you’re gently jostled toward the center of the dance floor. Savvy throws her arms across your shoulders as the two of you giggle and dance even closer together. It’s easy to fall into rhythm with Savvy, and you toss your head back as she twirls you around. Savvy leans in close to your face.

“There’s a guy watching you over at the bar,” she whispers, turning you around to catch the briefest glimpse of him before spinning you to face her again.

You grin and shake your head.

“How do you know he’s not watching you?”

Savvy rolls her eyes.

“Because I pay attention,” she scoffs. “Go talk to him.”

You raise an eyebrow at her.

“Michael will be here any minute.”

“And? You’re still single and you look hot tonight. I think you can flirt with a rando at a bar without him worrying about being mugged off.”

“Oh Savvy I don’t know,” you sigh. “I really like him.”

Savvy rolls her eyes.

“I know you do, Y/N, but you’ve also had a shit month and you’re wound tighter than a fucking spring! You can have fun, let the very hot guy at the bar buy you a drink, and then come back and dance with me until your sugar daddy boyfriend gets here, okay?”

“He’s not my sugar daddy Savvy,” you correct.

“Again, I call bull. But stop stalling and get your ass over to the bar.”

She gently pushes you in the bar’s general direction, and you shake your head at her antics, mustering up the courage to approach the stranger across the room whose eyes you can now see are trained on your every move. There’s something familiar about him almost immediately, but you can’t place it. He smirks as he watches you approach, leaning back into the bar with an ease that’s natural. He moves like Michael does, you think. He moves like he owns the place. You’d believe he did, if you didn’t know Oliver’s brother personally. As you get closer to the stranger, you watch his eyes widen at the sight of you. You take a seat at the bar, leaving enough distance between you and him that if he wants to talk, he’ll have to come over to you. You glance at him over your shoulder before motioning toward the bartender, hoping the stranger will take the hint.

“Ice water, please,” you ask the bartender.

You want to keep your wits about you.

“Are you here with anyone?”

You turn toward the voice that’s warmer than you expected. The stranger smiles at you, full lips stretching across white teeth, and your stomach does somersaults. He’s gorgeous in the way that models are, and has the warmest brown eyes you’ve ever seen.

“I-I am, yeah. Well, waiting for someone,” you stammer, a bit taken aback.

He frowns, but gives you a small nod.

“Can’t say I’m pleased to hear it, though it’s what I expected,” he drawls, luring you in almost immediately.

Woah. His voice is like honey—warm and smooth, and a bit dark too—and you instantly know that this man knows what he’s doing. To prove it, he smirks at you as the next words tumble from his mouth.

“You’re fuckin’ gorgeous so of course you’ve got someone. Although I will say, he seems like a pretty shit guy to leave a girl like you alone tonight.”

Chatty, too, you think to yourself, amused by him already. You raise an eyebrow at him, and he leans across the bar to extend his hand.

“I’m Isiah.”

“Y/N,” you say, taking his hand to shake it. “I’m surprised you let me get a word in.”

Isiah laughs loud enough for the whole bar to hear, and sure enough, some patrons turn to glance your way before going back to their own business. If Michael shows up to the club before you’ve made it back to Savvy, you hope he won’t get the wrong idea.

“It’s a shame you are seeing someone,” he chuckles. “It’s not often you find a girl that’s both good to look at and to talk to.”

From the cheeky glint in his eyes, you can tell that he’s just chatting, but you don’t resist the urge to take the bait and light him up a bit.

“Well maybe if you weren’t an ass that only approached girls because you liked the look of them, you’d find that most of us are able to hold a conversation.”

You wink at him as the bartender brings over your water, and reaches to replace Isiah’s glass of whiskey. Isiah turns toward you, a soft smile on his lips.

“You’re right. That was a bit of a dick thing to say. Can I buy you a drink to make up for it?”

You roll your eyes playfully at his question. Quite the charmer, this one.

“I did tell you I was waiting for someone,” you tease.

“I know,” he says. “I just want to buy you a drink. Promise.”

You take a minute to get a good look at him. He’s a beautiful man, you’ve gathered that already. Smooth, warm brown skin and even browner, sparkling eyes. He might be one of the prettiest men you’ve ever seen.

“Sure,” you say. “I’ll take a mojito.”

He grins at you before giving you a quick nod and placing your order with the bartender. Put anything she orders on my tab, you hear him say, and you marvel at the gesture. It’s a shame that you can’t actually flirt with him like you’d really like to.

“So where’re you from?” he asks.

“The States. Chicago. I moved here for grad school. What about you?”

“Birmingham,” he answers, and your eyes light with recognition.

“I thought I recognized your accent.”

Isiah stares back at you, incredulous. How would you know his accent?

“You been there before?”

“No,” you begin, shaking your head. “My boyf—er, friend’s from there.”

Did you just slip up and almost call Michael your boyfriend? Shit. You’re in this deeper than you thought. Isiah nods.

“Ah, well he’s got good taste.”

“In what?”

“Girls and hometowns.”

His goofiness surprises you, and you let a giggle slip from your lips. Isiah’s eyes light at the sound.

“What a pretty laugh,” he sighs.

You thank him sweetly, and he mutters under his breath about how unfair it is that you’re basically spoken for, because you’re fucking perfect. The bartender brings your drinks, and when Isiah hands you your glass, goosebumps rise on your skin as your fingertips graze his. You take the opportunity to gaze at him while you sip your drink, watching as he loses himself in your eyes. It’s good to know that he feels it too. This pull—magnetic, almost. Instinctively, he leans closer, and your breath catches in your throat. Before either of you can do anything you’ll eventually regret, you feel an arm wrap around your waist.

“There you are.”

Michael. Thankfully, Isiah registers his presence before Michael notices that he’s been flirting with you.

“I should’ve known she was your girl,” Isiah chuckles, shaking his head.

“I should’ve known the two of you would find each other without me having to introduce you.”

Your eyes widen as you look back and forth between the two of them.

“You know each other?”

They both laugh, nodding at you. Michael’s eyes are bright as he looks down to give you a soft smile.

“Isiah’s my best mate, basically my brother. We’ve been friends since we were teens,” he says. “He’s also the only person I know, besides my cousin John, that’s cheekier than you.”

You roll your eyes at the last bit, which only makes him laugh.

“You’re lucky I’ve missed you, you ass.”

He chuckles and pulls you close to press a kiss to your temple.

“Mm, I’ve missed you too,” he hums, giving your waist a quick squeeze before pulling away to turn to his friend. “Do you mind if I stay and chat to Isiah for a bit? You can head back to Savvy if you’d like, I’ll join you soon.”

You nod, and turn to Isiah.

“It was really great to meet you. Thank you for the drink! It’s good to know Michael actually has friends,” you quip, offering him a sweet smile.

He grins.

“It was great to meet you too, Y/N. I’ll see you ‘round, yeah?”

You nod, and give him a small wave goodbye before heading over to Savvy and Oliver who have made themselves comfortable in the booth you’ve been given for the night.

“Holy shit Sav,” you gush, as soon as you’re within earshot. “So that was Michael’s best friend.”

Savvy’s eyes look like they’re about to bulge out of her skull.

“What??” she asks, incredulous.

“I didn’t know it until Michael came over and actually introduced us, but yeah. God, I’m a little embarrassed. I need another drink.”

Oliver’s eyebrows raise at that.

“Shots?”

You nod quickly.

“Hell yes. Shots.”

He smirks at you. How Savvy managed to find a boyfriend that’s essentially your carbon copy is something you’ll never figure out, but you don’t even mind. Thank the universe for Oliver.

“I’ll head over to the bar now then.”

“You’re my favorite person. You know that, right?”

“It gets better every time you tell me!”

You both giggle at yourselves, and Savvy rolls her eyes.

“You two are obnoxious,” she whines.

“We know,” Oliver says, leaning over to press a sweet kiss to her mouth.

He grabs the glass of whiskey you ordered for Michael and heads toward the bar. As soon as he’s gone, Savvy turns toward you, eyes gleaming with excitement.

“Spill.”

“You’re such a gossip, you know that Sav?”

“Stop stalling!”

You sigh, glancing over at the bar to see Oliver engaged in lively conversation with Michael and Isiah, and you smile to yourself.

“He was really, really nice,” you begin. “And funny, and sweet, and basically if I wasn’t already somewhat-dating his best friend I would’ve had no problem letting him take me home tonight.”

Savvy’s jaw drops.

“Shut up.”

“I know.”

“You weren’t even over there for that long!”

You nod in agreement.

“That’s why it’s so bizarre. I don’t know, Sav, it just felt…good to talk to him. Comfortable, I guess.”

“Hmm,” Savvy muses. “You could always date them both.”

“Savvy!”

“You could! It’s 2020, Y/N.”

“I know I can, smartass,” you say, rolling your eyes. “But I’m pretty sure that’s not Michael’s thing.”

You can see the wheels turning in her drama obsessed brain.

“Threesome?”

“Savvy!”

You can’t control the laugh that escapes your mouth, and soon Savvy is laughing with you. When Michael and Oliver return to your booth—a round of shots for each of you in their hands—you’re still recovering from the fit of giggles.

“What’s so funny?” Oliver asks, and you and Savvy quickly shake your heads.

“Oh it’s nothing, babe! Just being silly,” she says, reaching for one of the shots in his hand.

Michael slides into the booth next to you, setting the drinks down on the table. When he turns toward you, you feel the heat of his gaze immediately.

“Hi,” he breathes, leaning forward to tuck a loose strand of hair behind your ear.

His hand lingers on your skin, fingers ghosting along the back of your neck. He resists the urge to tug you toward him and press a kiss to your lips, mostly because he can’t kiss you the way he’d like to in public. Not while he’s still this sober, anyway.

“Hi,” you echo, leaning into his touch.

“You don’t know how good it is to see you after the month I’ve had.”

“Hmm, you should show me then, Gray,” you smirk, reaching for the shot glasses.

“Trouble,” he murmurs, accepting the shot you offer him.

Savvy and Oliver turn toward you then, and the four of you toast glasses before tossing back your shots. Tequila. It burns your throat on the way down, and you shake your head as your body adjusts to the sting. Michael slides a glass of water your way, and you give him a grateful smile before taking a sip.

“We’re going to go dance!” Savvy announces, tugging on Oliver’s hand.

As she leads him out of the booth, she turns to give you and Michael a quick wink over her shoulder. Michael chuckles as you shake your head at Savvy’s antics.

“I, for one, am incredibly grateful for your roommate,” he says, sliding closer to you.

“Yeah? Why’s that?” you ask bemusedly.

A slow grin spreads across Michaels lips as he leans forward to cup the back of your head. Your breath catches in your throat.

“Because now I get to do this,” he purrs, pressing his lips to yours.

The kiss is softer than you expected, and you sigh into Michael’s mouth as he keeps his kisses slow. His fingers curl along your jaw to pull you closer.

“Michael,” you sigh against his mouth, fully leaning into his touch.

His other hand presses against your waist—and as your kisses quicken, Michael’s thumb rubs gentle circles into the bit of exposed skin at your stomach.

“I really like this dress,” he murmurs, allowing the tip of his thumb to graze the underside of your breast.

He runs his tongue along your bottom lip before sucking it between his teeth. Your hands tangle in his hair, and soon, you completely forget your surroundings. It’s definitely been too long since you’ve last kissed him, and if his actions tonight have been any indication: Michael feels the same way.

“We should go dance, you know,” you whisper against his lips, making no move to actually pull away.

“We’ll get there, eventually,” he counters, kissing you again.

You don’t protest when he slips his tongue in your mouth. His fingers trace your jaw, then your collarbone before finally coming to rest against your throat. He doesn’t apply pressure, but they rest there, and you feel a knot beginning to build in your stomach. Michael pulls away to look into your eyes then, fingers still pressed to your neck.

“I’m so tempted to say fuck it and let’s head back to mine, but I think Savvy’d have my head for that.”

You don’t know if it’s the alcohol or Michael himself, but your head’s already buzzing. You nod, giving him a timid smile before bursting into a fit of laughter.

“She definitely would.”

“You’re a giddy drunk,” he teases, wrapping an arm around your shoulder to pull you into his chest.

“I’m not drunk, yet,” you quip. “I’m just happy to see you. And maybe slightly tipsy.”

“Mmm,” he hums. “I’m happy to see you too. So happy, in fact, that I brought you a present.”

“Michael,” you start to protest.

“You’ll like this one, Y/N. I promise.”

He pulls away from you to pull something out of his jacket, and you try not to frown at the loss of contact. He hands you a plain white envelope. You look back at him, and urges you to open it. You recognize the print of the ticket stubs immediately. Shakespeare’s Globe. Titus Andronicus. Standing tickets. So he had listened to your rant about the best way to experience a show there. The smile on your face is likely enormous and stupid, but you can’t be bothered to care. You turn toward him to find him already grinning back at you.

“Did you go to my job and buy tickets for a show?”

He nods.

“I promised you that I’d let you take me to one.”

“I could have probably gotten them for free, you know?”

“I know,” he says. “But then I wouldn’t have gotten to see that look on your face.”

You lean forward to press a kiss to his lips. He gasps against your mouth, and you wrap an arm around the back of his neck to pull him closer. It’s unbelievably sweet of him to have thought of you and your job, especially amidst his own responsibilities. You’ve managed to catch him off guard by kissing him first, and Michael groans low in his throat as you card your fingers through his hair.

“Let’s go dance,” you whisper hotly against his mouth. “And then, I want you to take me home.”

Around shot four or five, Savvy suggests body shots. You’re beyond tipsy at this point—solidly drunk is more like it— and any idea that comes out of her mouth sounds like a good one in this state. At any rate, it’ll give Michael even more of an excuse to touch you. You’ve returned to your booth for a slight break from dancing. Michael holds his liquor much better than you do, but even he’s considerably under the influence. He’s taken off his jacket, and he watches as your fingers idly trace the buttons that line his torso. You’ve been glued to one another all night. Michael expected to hate dancing, but quickly found that it’s hard to hate anything that gives him an excuse to press your body to his in public. You’re a good dancer too.

Savvy and Oliver return to the table with a plate of limes and a pair of salt shakers, and Michael’s eyes darken with an idea. You watch him, curiously, as he reaches toward one of the shot glasses.

“Grab a lime, Y/N,” he instructs, reaching for the salt.

You do as he says, watching him with bright eyes.

“Now put it between those pretty lips of yours.”

You don’t miss the suggestive nature of his tone, and you smirk at him as you raise the lime slice to your mouth. You part your lips slightly, watching as Michael’s eyes zero in on them.

“Y/N,” he warns.

“Relax. I’m putting it in my mouth right now,” you tease, laughing at your own cheek before popping the lime slice between your lips.

Michael rolls his eyes but leans his face close to whisper in your ear.

“Tilt you head back, and stay still for me, yeah?”

You nod, before doing what he asks. Michael leans forward to press a kiss to your throat. You gasp, and as your body starts to lurch forward Michael’s hand is firm at your back.

“Easy,” he murmurs.

He trails kisses from your neck to your collarbone, coming to rest at the slight peaks of your breasts exposed by your dress. Michael doesn’t hesitate to lick a stripe of skin, and cold air touches your skin for only a moment before you feel the sprinkle of salt. A hand cups the back of your head and tilts you forward to meet Michael’s dark, green eyes.

“I should probably take that shot,” you hear him say, but you’re still focused on his eyes.

Michael takes the shot without even wincing. When he leans forward to lick at the salt on your chest, he holds your eyes. He trails kisses up your neck until you can feel his breath along your jaw. Your breath catches as he leans forward to pluck the lime from your lips. When you grab at his shirt and pull him back in to kiss you, you can taste the tequila still on his tongue. Somewhere, in the back of your mind, you remember that you aren’t entirely alone, so you don’t kiss Michael like you’d like to. Instead, you pull away to look into his eyes.

“I want to go home.”

He nods.

“Okay. Let’s go, then.”

You make quick work of saying goodbye to Savvy and Oliver, who plan on staying out “just a bit longer.” Michael makes a call, and then the two of you make your way toward the exit. The night is quiet outside of The Lilac Room, and as the two of you stumble toward your apartment, you’re grateful for the fresh air. Michael holds your hand as you make the short walk back to your apartment, listening to you chat idly about your upcoming audition and a recent conversation you’d had with one of your professors. He waits until you’re both inside your apartment to pull you close, wrapping an arm around your waist.

“I missed you so much,” he sighs, pressing his forehead to yours. “I know it’s odd, seeing as we haven’t known each other long at all, but I did. I really did.”

You smile at him, reaching up to cup one of his cheeks.

“I missed you too, Michael.”

“Can I kiss you, gorgeous?”

“You know you can, Mr. Gray.”

“My cheeky girl,” he murmurs, pressing his lips to yours.

This kiss is needier than you expected, but you lean into Michael’s touch. You stumble back toward your bedroom, tugging at his shirt to keep his lips pressed to yours. Thankfully, you left your door open before heading out, so you and Michael easily slip inside your room. He takes a second to pull away and shut the door behind you before leading you over to your bed. He kisses you again, and you let his hands guide you to lay back onto your bed. Michael follows your body, coming to settle between your thighs. You hook your legs around his waist, and Michael chuckles, pulling his mouth from yours.

“Not tonight, Y/N.”

You frown, looking up at him.

“Why not?”

“Don’t pout,” he chides. “We’ve both been drinking. I don’t think either of us have got a clear enough head to be making that decision.”

“Fuck, why are you so nice?” you whine, flopping back onto your pillows.

Michael chuckles and rolls off of you. He sits up to kick off his shoes, then reaches forward to unstrap your heels.

“‘M only nice to you,” he insists.

You sit up onto your elbows and look at him.

“Help me out of this dress?”

He nods and offers a hand to you.

“Come ‘ere.”

Michael helps you off of the bed and turns you around to get the zipper at your back. You slip the dress off of your shoulders, and Michael hands you the oversized t-shirt you have thrown at the foot of your bed. You slip it over your head and instruct Michael to check in your drawers for a set of sweat pants that would probably fit him. You head to the bathroom to brush your teeth and give him time to change, being sure to grab a bottle of ibuprofen from the medicine cabinet before heading back to your room. Michael smiles at you when you come in, arms reaching to pull you close.

“Let’s go to bed,” he hums drowsily, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

You crawl under your covers, feeling Michael’s body follow close behind. He cradles you in his arms, pressing your back to his chest. He leans forward to press a gentle kiss to your shoulder before settling into your pillows.

“Goodnight, Y/N,” he mumbles, already drifting to sleep.

You smile as you close your eyes, relaxing against his chest.

“Goodnight Michael.”

You’re a goddess first thing in the morning, Michael thinks. He hasn’t always been an early bird, but he’s grown so used to mornings in court that it’s become a second nature. What he isn’t used to, is waking up in someone else’s bed. Sleeping next to a woman he hasn’t fucked. It’s odd how at home he feels with an arm slung around your waist and your cheek pressed to his chest. He keeps his breathing light, not want to disturb your sleep, not yet. He’d rather just hold you close while he ignores the headache starting to creep in at his temples. A quick glance over to your bedside table reminds him of the bottle of painkillers you set out before the two of you headed to bed, and Michael thanks the heavens that you’re bloody brilliant. He needs water though, and you will too when you wake.

Slowly, he eases out from under you, waiting until you’ve settled against the pillows before he climbs out of your bed and heads toward the kitchen. There’s no sign of Savvy or Oliver, and he makes quick work of finding two glasses. He runs the tap until it’s cold, then fills up a cup for each of you before heading back to your room. He finds you splayed out against the pillows, starfish style. Cute, he thinks, ambling toward your nightstand. He’s careful to keep the bottle still, so the rattling of the pills inside don’t wake you up. Michael fishes two ibuprofen for both of you before setting the bottle back on the table and climbing into bed. Gently, he wraps an arm around your shoulder to shake you awake. You feel the soft press of lips against your temples, and smile in your sleepy haze.

“Wake up, pretty girl,” Michael coos, chuckling as you curl further into his chest.

“Mmm, don’t wanna,” you mumble, shaking your head.

“Come on, Y/N,” he laughs. “I wanna see your eyes. Please?”

His hands trace up and down your back as he presses slow kisses to your neck. Your body is certainly awake now, but you keep your eyes closed to draw out Michael’s teasing. He kisses his way up your neck and across your jaw, until his mouth reaches your earlobe.

“Wake up, Y/N,” he grunts, nibbling at your ear with his teeth.

Your eyes shoot open as a soft gasp leaves your lips, and Michael settles over you.

“There she is,” he hums, leaning forward to press a kiss to your lips.

You smile against his mouth as you kiss him back, pulling him closer with a hand at the nape of his neck. Michael’s hips settle in between your thighs, and your legs wrap around his waist. Just like last night, you think. You can’t believe this is finally happening.

“Wait wait,” Michael breathes, pulling away to sit back on his legs.

“Again?” you groan, sitting up to glare at him.

Michael smirks at you as he leans over toward your nightstand, reaching for a glass of water and the painkillers you set out last night. He pushes them into your hands before grabbing some of his own. Michael downs the medicine and the water before setting the glass down. His hands find your thighs, and his thumbs rub slow circles on your skin as he looks into your eyes.

“Take those and drink the entire glass, and I’ll make you feel good,” he whispers, voice low.

You don’t miss the heat in his eyes. Michael watches as you take the medicine and drink all of your water, thumbs continuing to stroke the insides of your thighs. As soon as you finish, Michael leans forward to wrap an arm around your back. He takes the glass from your hand and sets it down. His hands trail up from your thighs and catch the hem of your t-shirt. He lifts it over your head before tossing it over his shoulder.

“Lean back onto your pillows,” he instructs, following your body with his.

Michael slots his lips over yours, immediately dipping his tongue into your mouth. Eager to have his lips on yours again, you curl your fingers into his hair to keep his mouth close. Michael’s hands grip your waist, as you raise your hips to wrap your legs around his waist, caging him in once again. Michael smirks against your mouth.

“I’m starting to get the hint that this is a favorite position of yours,” he hums, hands sliding down to massage the globes of your ass.

“Michael,” you sigh, leaning your head back as his kisses trail toward your neck.

“I can’t wait to taste you, pretty girl,” he whispers against your skin, hands trailing up to tug your panties over your ass and down your legs.

Michael pulls away briefly to admire the sight of you naked before him.

“You look perfect,” he sighs, reaching down to palm himself through his sweats.

“Thank you, Sir,” you whisper.

Michael grins at you, reaching forward to cup your cheek in his palm.

“You gonna be good for me?”

You nod quickly, back arching when you feel one of his hands slip between your legs. He groans low in his throat when he feels you practically dripping for him already.

“Fuck,” he hisses, watching through lidded eyes as he slides one finger into your slick heat. “You’re fucking wet.”

He peppers hot kisses against the base of your throat as he slowly works his finger, thumb coming up to rub soft circles on your clit.

“Sh-Shit,” you whimper, as Michael sucks a mark onto your collarbone.

“Tell me how it feels,” he mumbles, adding another finger.

“So good,” you gasp. “Fuck, Michael!”

He fucks you slow with his fingers, curling them slightly to reach even deeper before dragging them out again. His tongue laps at the mark he’s made, dark eyes watching you as you struggle to collect your words.

“It feels good,” you whine.

It’s all you can manage.

“Just good?” he hums. “Sounds like I should make it even better, yeah?”

You nod, watching as he trails his kisses down the center of your chest, over your stomach and upper thighs before coming to rest at their apex. He leans down to rest on his elbows, face to face with his fingers sliding in and out of you.

“Can I have a taste?” he asks, licking his bottom lip as his eyes zero in on your wetness.

“Please, Sir,” you beg, hands already finding their place in his hair.

Michael flattens his tongue against you before licking a long stripe up your clit, pulling a beautiful moan from your lips. He laps at the pool of wetness that has started to gather on his fingers, and gazes up at you to watch you begin to unravel at his touch. There’s a pressure building in the pit of your stomach, and as Michael curls his fingers to brush against that spot, you start to see stars.

“Oh fuck,” you whine as he wraps his lips around your clit.

Michael sucks, hard, pulling a squeal from your lips.

“Such pretty noises, baby,” he moans, watching you in awe.

You’ve never seen someone look at you with equal parts lust and admiration, but Michael gazes up at you as if you’re something divine. You feel yourself start to clench around his fingers, and Michael groans against you. He keeps his free hand at your hip, anchoring himself as he gets lost in you. He closes his eyes as he sucks harder, fingers pumping at a steady rhythm to bring you closer to the edge. You can feel your legs beginning to shake, and you tug at Michael’s hair.

“Sir, please,” you gasp, back arching as Michael curls his fingers again.

“Please what?”

“Please let me cum.”

“Go ahead,” he grunts, closing his lips around your clit again.

Your resolve snaps, and you gasp Michael’s name as you cum on his fingers. He slips his fingers out of you only to replace them with his tongue, fucking you slowly through your orgasm. You open your eyes to see him smiling up at you, mouth slick with your release. Michael presses soft kisses to your clit as your body settles from the aftershocks of your orgasm. He kisses up your body until he’s face to face with you, eyes lighting at your flushed cheeks.

“I’ve been waiting entirely too long to do that,” is the first thing he says, and you’re too blissed out to come up with one of your usual witty comebacks.

Instead, you reach for his wrist and pull his fingers—still wet with your cum—and slip them into your mouth. Michael groans as you slip your tongue in between them, keeping your eyes on his.

“Fuck, that’s hot,” he whispers, unable to look away from your plump lips as his fingers slip in and out and in and out.

He growls when your teeth graze his skin. One of Michael’s hands curls beneath your jaw, and he pulls you forward to straddle his hips. You let go of his fingers with an audible pop, staring into his lust-blown eyes.

“Are you gonna fuck me now, Mr. Gray?” you ask sweetly, trailing a hand down his chest to slip into his sweatpants.

He’s hard and heavy in your hand, and you give him a few gentle strokes as you watch his resolve begin to break. A muscle ticks in Michael’s jaw, and his hand on your jaw slides down to wrap gently around your throat.

“I am,” he growls, wrapping his other hand around your wrist to stop your movements.

He instructs you to lay back, standing up to slip his sweats and boxers off of his hips and down his legs. You direct him over to the box of condoms nestled in a drawer under your bedside table, and you watch with hungry eyes as he slips the latex over his length. He’s bigger than you expected, and you watch him smirk as he registers the surprise in your eyes. Before you can start to genuinely ask him if he’ll actually fit, Michael covers his mouth with yours. One of his hands directs your arms above your head, and he latches onto your wrists to hold them there.

“Please fuck me,” you whimper against his lips.

“Easy,” he chuckles, trailing a hand to the inside of your thigh to spread your legs wider for him. “I’ve got you.”

He takes himself in his hand, rubbing the head of his cock against your folds. You whine, bucking your hips toward the touch, desperate for friction.

“Please,” you sigh.

“You can have whatever you want when you beg me like that,” Michael groans, pushing himself forward to slip inside of you.

He takes his time to make sure you feel him inch by inch, sucking on your bottom lip with his tongue. He stills when he finally bottoms out, groaning low in his throat as you clench around his cock.

“Fuck, you feel good,” he murmurs.

“So do you,” you sigh, tossing your head back as he begins to move his hips.

Michael keeps his thrusts slow, allowing your legs to wrap around his waist to pull him in deeper. His hand slips between the two of you to rub slow circles at your clit, and Michael lifts his mouth from yours to look into your eyes.

“You’re squeezing the shit out of my cock, baby,” he groans as he continues his lazy thrusts, face falling to the crook of your neck.

Michael places hot, open-mouthed kisses to your skin as he continues to work you open, spurred on by the soft moans leaving your lips with every thrust of his hips. It’s slow, sleepy morning sex, and you lose yourself in the feeling of Michael getting to know your body for the first time. It feels delicious, the pleasure he’s bringing you, and as he brings you closer toward your release you find yourself getting lost even further in his touch. You start to work your hips against his, and Michael’s hands grip your ass to pull you even closer.

“Fuck baby, look at you,” he coos. “Fucking your perfect little pussy on my cock. You’re such a good girl.”

His hand at your clit rubs the slightest bit faster, and you gasp as one of Michael’s hands returns to your throat.

“I’m-I’m gonna—” your breath hitches in your throat, but Michael nods, understanding.

He gives your throat a gentle squeeze as he feels your body tense, signaling the approach of your climax.

“Cum for me sweet girl,” he murmurs, staring hungrily at you as your body begins to unravel.

“Oh my god,” you whine as your orgasm takes you by surprise, gazing wide-eyed at Michael as he continues to fuck you through it.

“Shit, that feels good,” he hums, pistoning his hips a bit faster to chase his own release.

Your hands scrape along his back as you feel yourself on the edge of another, smaller orgasm, and you clench around Michael’s cock as his hips stutter. He’s close.

“Come on my cock, Y/N,” he hisses, burying his face into the pillow behind you.

You let go. Michael’s body freezes as he’s struck with his own orgasm, and your name falls from his lips as he feels you squeeze him again. Absolutely perfect, he whispers into your skin, soft kiss after soft kiss up and down the column of your neck. He’s gorgeous in his post-orgasm glow, and you card your fingers through his hair as he catches his breath. You whine when he pulls his hips from yours, but he settles back onto the pillows to pull you onto his chest.

“You’re everything I have ever wanted,” he murmurs against your lips.

“Hmm, everything?” you sigh, pressing a sweet kiss to his mouth before pulling away to look into his eyes.

“Everything,” he confirms, brushing his fingers across your cheek.

“Well thank you,” you say, surprised at his sudden tenderness.

Michael gazes at you softly as you look down at him, green eyes shining with a fondness you suspect he’s reserved only for you.

“Can I ask you something?”

He breaks eye contact, staring down at his hands.

“What is it, Michael?”

He takes a breath before looking up at you again, determination in his eyes.

“I don’t want to rush you, especially since last night was technically only our second date, but I was thinking, and wondering if maybe you’d like to—”

“Yes,” you interrupt, watching as the smile builds on Michael’s face.

“You didn’t even let me finish,” he smirks, leaning forward to touch his forehead to yours.

“Didn’t need to,” you hum. “I’ve been waiting too long for you to ask me out, officially, Gray.”

He’ll never get tired of that mouth of yours.

“Oh you have, hm?” he asks, pressing a hot kiss to your lips.

You can feel him beginning to stir again between your legs, and you smirk against his mouth.

“I have. You sure took your time.”

He chuckles and kisses you again, slipping his arms around you to cradle to close to his chest.

“Let’s go take a shower,” he suggests, leaning forward to kiss your shoulder.

His head lolls lazily on his shoulders as he gazes up to look at you, running his tongue across his bottom lip.

“And then we can come back to bed so I can really fuck you like you’re mine.”

“You’re on, Mr. Gray,” you sigh, wrapping your arms around his neck as he lifts you from the bed and carries you toward the bathroom.

His, you muse. You could get used to this.

reblogging later with tags. wanna be tagged in this fic? click the link above! (do not send me an ask! click the link!)

#michael gray smut #michael gray au #michael gray #modern michael gray #michael gray x reader #peaky blinders au #peaky blinders smut #emotchalla writes

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calamity-bean · 5 years

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Unexpectedly and quite by accident, I’ve fallen down a rabbit hole researching the historical Charles Frederick Des Voeux.

I’ve learned a lot about the Franklin Expedition and its members lately through the brilliant efforts of the Terror fandom... But it occurred to me that I’ve seen barely any mention whatsoever of the real Des Voeux! Possibly this is simply because I’ve missed it, in which case, my bad; possibly this is because no one’s interested, in which case I’ve wasted a lot of time. But I got curious. So I started digging, and I found...

...not a ton, I’m afraid. Not in great detail. As Sir Francis McClintock noted, Des Voeux was young. His career was still just starting, and he simply hadn’t had much time yet to leave his mark. Yet he’d already been noted for his “intelligence, gallantry, and zeal.” He’d already traveled widely, served in multiple wars, and was recommended to the Erebus by none other than Fitzjames, who described him as “a most unexceptionable, clever, agreeable, light-hearted, obliging young fellow, and a great favourite of Hodgson’s, which is much in his favour besides.”

So here’s everything I’ve got on the real Charles Frederick, as best I could stitch together from naval records, histories, and more. Also featuring some thoughts on his portrayal in the TV series; Goodsir “in ecstacies”; a bit about Hodgson; and quite a lot of Fitzjames.

A quick note on accuracy. I’m not a historian. I tried my best. Most of the info here about Des Voeux’s naval career comes from sources that seem credible and that often back each other up. The bit I’m more cautious about, though, is his ancestry and early life, because the only source I could find claiming any knowledge of that was Burke’s Peerage, and Burke’s has been known to be... wrong. For lack of any info to the contrary, I’m going to give y’all Burke’s version of events for now, but for more on my findings and reservations, see the Sources section at the end of this post. And if you have more info on ol’ C. Freddie or spot any mistakes, feel free to let me know!

Edit, 11/9/18: Good news! @francienolan was kind enough to send me a newspaper clipping from The Colonies and India, May 25, 1895, featuring a statement from colonial governor George William Des Voeux supporting Burke’s claims. I’ve updated bits of this post accordingly and have added G. William’s statement to the Sources section at the end, but I’ve also left my original discussion of Burke’s information intact.

Early Life

According to Burke’s Peerage, Charles Frederick was the second son of Reverend Henry Des Voeux, himself the third son of Sir Charles Des Voeux, 1st Baronet of Indiaville, in the Queen’s County, Ireland (now County Laois). Ireland? But Des Voeux is a French name, right? Yes! It was also not the family’s original name, but yes, their origins were French. Marin Anthony Vinchon de Bacquencourt picked “Des Voeux” as his new surname after having a falling-out with Catholicism, which resulted in a falling-out with his family, which resulted in his emigrating from Normandy to Ireland. De Bacquencourt’s son, the aforementioned grandpa Sir Charles, was born in Ireland, got rich in India, repped Carlow Borough and Carlingford in the Irish House of Commons, and was created baronet in 1787. Fittingly for a house whose founder chose the name voeux (which can be translated as “wishes”), the official family motto was Altiora in votis: “Greater things are the objects of my wishes.”

Burke’s doesn’t bother listing Charles Frederick’s year or place of birth, because that would make my life too easy. But we can make some guesses. We know that his big bro (Henry Dalrymple) was born in either 1822 or 1824 and that his immediately younger bro (Charles Champagne) was born in 1827. (1827 also marks the death of Rev. Henry’s first wife, Frances Dalrymple of Barrow, County Derby, married December 1, 1812. Assuming C. F. was legitimate, which I’ve found no reason not to assume, Frances would have been his mother.) Thus, assuming at least a year between children, we can estimate that Charles Frederick was born no earlier than 1823 and no later than 1826.

As for where... The baronetcy was in Ireland, yes, but Henry Dalrymple was born in England — specifically, in Carlton, Nottinghamshire, which is also where Rev. Henry married his second wife, Frances (Fanny) Elizabeth Hutton, in 1828. If Rev. Henry’s family was in Carlton in both 1822/24 and 1828, it seems possible they were there when Charles Frederick was born, too. The genealogies I’ve found have had wildly different opinions about Rev. Henry’s total number of children, but according to Burke’s, at least, between his father’s three wives, Charles Frederick had eight full or half siblings: five brothers and three sisters. Some sources list fewer; some list even more! Who knows!

Alas: that’s all I’ve got on his early life, and it frustrates me that so much of it is based in reading between the lines. I do want to note the baronetcy’s coat of arms, which I found intriguingly squirrel-centric. Pictured up top, they consisted of a red field with a gold vertical stripe containing a squirrel above a Maure, with another purple squirrel as the crest. I mention this for one reason and one reason only: I now cannot stop thinking of Sebastian Armesto’s snarky, moody Mr. Des Voeux as a grumpy squirrel.

The Second Syrian War (1840)

Fast forward to 1840, when, happily, our information becomes much more specific. This year marks the first record I’ve found of Des Voeux’s naval career, when, according to McClintock, he served in the Second Syrian War (the Second Egyptian–Ottoman War) under Commodore Sir Charles John Napier, captain of the Powerful.

Des Voeux would now have been between the ages of 14 and 17. He definitely was not yet a mate, but I couldn’t find his exact rank at the time or any other particulars of his service in this conflict.

I know this post is supposed to be about Des Voeux, but I’d be remiss not to mention that another familiar face was also in the area: our good buddy James Fitzjames! He’d been a gunnery lieutenant aboard the Ganges (under Captain Barrington Reynolds) since October 17, 1838, and when the war began, his ship headed for the Mediterranean alongside the Powerful and the Implacable. James made himself rather notorious here by undertaking the tricky (and highly perilous) task of sneaking into Beirut one night, distributing a proclamation by Napier to the Egyptian soldiers camped there, and sneaking out again, which pissed off Egyptian commander Soliman Pasha al-Faransawi so much he put a price on Fitzjames’s head. Normal Tuesday night for James Fitzjames, really.

Whether Des Voeux and Fitzjames ever crossed paths in the Mediterranean, I don’t know. But they definitely did during...

The First Opium War (1841–42)

All aboard the Cornwallis! Pictured above, this 74-gun third-rate ship of the line hosted treaty negotiations following China’s defeat in 1842, and during the war itself, it served as home to Des Voeux as well as at least three other future members of the lost Franklin Expedition.

You can probably guess that Fitzjames was one of them; this war was, after all, “the time he got shot by the Chinese.” He’d caught the attention of Sir William Parker during the Syrian War and, after getting home and serving just a few weeks aboard the Excellent at Portsmouth, was appointed to the Cornwallis, Parker’s flagship, in April or May of 1841.

Fitzjames recalls that Des Voeux was “a mere boy” at this time (he would’ve now been between 15 and 18) and that he was en route to join the Endymion, commanded by Sir Frederick Grey. Des Voeux did indeed transfer to the Endymion at some point during the war, though I’m not sure where or when. The Cornwallis departed from Plymouth July 3, 1841, and reached Chusan on January 12, 1842; the Endymion departed Plymouth February 2, 1841, but had to refit its mainmast at the Cape of Good Hope and its hull at Aden, and THEN spent some time in the East Indies, so it didn’t reach Chusan till July 5, 1842. I’m not sure whether Des Voeux stayed on the Cornwallis all the way to China or whether he joined the Endymion at some port en route. Somewhere in the midst of all this, he also found time to serve as a naval aide-de-camp to General Sir Hugh Gough, the British commander-in-chief.

Another future Erebite to serve on the Cornwallis in China was Stephan Stanley, though Fitzjames tells us his time on board was brief, and I don’t know that it overlapped with Des Voeux’s. And, last but not least: George Henry Hodgson. At this time a mate, he was appointed to the Cornwallis on June 5, 1841, and distinguished himself in his service, particularly at Chinkiang (Zhenjiang) — so much so that he was rewarded with a lieutenant’s commission on December 23, 1842, shortly after the end of the war. He would probably love to tell his fellow officers about his role at Chinkiang over dinner sometime, I reckon, if even the slightest mention of that battle didn’t make Fitzjames launch into his whole bullet-wound saga again.

Perhaps the Cornwallis is where Hodgson’s particular fondness for Charles got its start. At any rate, the acquaintance with Fitzjames would prove fateful (and indirectly fatal) for Des Voeux.

Officer’s Examinations and Training (1844)

The next mention I’ve found of Charles Freddie comes from May 1, 1844, when he passed the examinations required for lieutenant rank and was promoted to mate / sub-lieutenant. Congrats!

Shortly after, in June, he was appointed to the Excellent (formerly the Boyne, above) at Portsmouth. I previously mentioned Fitzjames being employed on the Excellent also, as was Hodgson at various times. It was, in fact, a training ship — a gunnery school anchored north of Portsmouth Dockyard where sailors trained in such skills as artillery and mathematics by, say, firing big guns into the creek. Fitzjames served here in 1838 from January 19 to October 17, and then again for a few weeks in the spring of 1841. Hodgson served for some time starting in October 1840 and then again starting November 27, 1844; and Des Voeux served for “several months” starting in June 1844. Captain Sir Thomas Hastings was commander throughout all these years.

And now, at last, we reach 1845.

The Franklin Expedition (1845–??)

Des Voeux joined the crew of the Erebus on March 4, 1845, on the recommendation of James Fitzjames, who selected him based on their service together aboard the Cornwallis. He was now no older than 22 and no younger than 19.

We all know how this ends, even if we don’t know exactly when or how Des Voeux died. The National Maritime Museum’s collection contains a scrap of a wool shirt trimmed with cotton, cream colored, that was found by Inuit of Repulse Bay at a campsite near the mouth of the Back River and obtained from them by John Rae. A group of men from the expedition had starved to death at this camp. Near the left edge of the fragment, in line with the buttonholes, is inked “F:D:V: 1845.”

I suppose that’s not necessarily proof Des Voeux died at that camp; another man could have appropriated the shirt before or after Des Voeux’s death. But we know Des Voeux was at least still alive by May 28, 1847, when he and Graham Gore signed the record left in the cairn at Victory Point:

“28th of May, 1847. H.M. ships ‘Erebus’ and ‘Terror’ wintered in the ice in lat. 70° 05′ N., long. 98° 23′ W.

Having wintered in 1846–47 [sic; it was actually the winter of ’45–46] at Beechey Island, in lat. 74° 43′ 28′′ N., long. 91° 39′ 15′′ W., after having ascended Wellington Channel to lat. 77°, and returned by the west side of Cornwallis Island. Sir John Franklin commanding the expedition. All well. Party consisting of 2 officers and 6 men left the ships on Monday, 24th May, 1847.

Gm. Gore, Lieut. Chas. F. Des Voeux, Mate.”

Funnily enough, Des Voeux was technically not, by this time, a mate. One of the things that started me down this research rabbit-hole in the first place is that I came across a source referring to him as a lieutenant. That took me rather aback! The TV show never refers to him that way. As it turns out, though, Her Majesty did indeed promote Des Voeux, by brevet, to lieutenant on November 9, 1846. This was announced in a November 10 supplement to the London Gazette, which printed his new rank amid a long list of other officers whose various commissions were all to be dated to the 9th. Of course, by this time, the expedition had been gone more than a year already, the ships were already icebound off the coast of King William Land. Neither Des Voeux nor any of his shipmates could ever have learned of this. (The other mates — Sargent, Couch, Hornby, and Thomas — all received their commissions during the expedition, too.) As such, a lot of sources do refer to Des Voeux by his official rank of lieutenant, but for the purposes of the expedition itself, as far as we know, he continued to function as a mate.

Side note: It just so happens that I’m posting this on November 9, 2018. So... Happy 172nd anniversary of that promotion you never knew about, dude.

Tragedy is unavoidable with the Franklin Expedition, but I want to end this little history on a happier note. The following anecdote comes from a journal Fitzjames kept from June 8, 1845, a couple weeks after the expedition left Greenhithe, to July 11, the day before they continued onward from their stop at the Whalefish Islands in Greenland’s Disko Bay. Here they left the last of their letters ever to reach home. On Wednesday, June 25, 1845, Fitzjames recorded this pleasant scene of Des Voeux helping Goodsir collect specimens:

“I am now writing, 11 P.M., lat. 63°, near about a place marked on the chart as Lichtenfels. The sea, as the sun set half an hour ago, was of the most delicate blue in the shadows; perfectly calm — so calm that the Terror’s mast-heads are reflected close alongside, though she is half a mile off. The air is delightfully cool and bracing, and everybody is in good humour, either with himself or his neighbours. I have been on deck all day, taking observations. Goodsir is catching the most extraordinary animals in a net, and is in ecstacies. Gore and Des Voeux are over the side, poking with nets and long poles, with cigars in their mouths, and Osmar laughing.”

I think this a sweet way to remember them all: happy in each other’s company, laughing, on a beautiful summer’s eve. And wow, you can really tell it’s summer in the Arctic when the sun’s just set at 11 p.m., huh?

Thoughts on Des Voeux in The Terror (2018)

It’s been a bit surreal getting an idea of the real Des Voeux after only knowing him from The Terror. I haven’t read the novel, so I can’t speak to Dan Simmons’s depiction; as for the TV series, on my first watch-through I barely noticed him at all. By my second watch, I’d since taken notice of Sebastian Armesto in general, and I made a special point of recording every sign of Des Voeux in every episode: what he says, what he does, his personality, etc.

The show’s version of Charles Frederick is not terribly likable. He’s condescending to Goodsir and hostile to the Inuit. He’s sardonic at the best of times and, at worst, a mutineer, a cannibal, the killer of Tom Hartnell, a pathetic figure last seen begging Silna, whom he always disparaged, for help. He does not, in short, much resemble the friendly, good-humored boy who caught sea creatures for Goodsir and was so well-liked by Hodgson and Fitzjames.

But even on the show, he’s also portrayed as a highly capable officer — highly trusted, even, right up till the mutiny. Heck, part of the reason the mutiny succeeds is because he’s so trusted: in 1.08, when Crozier says they need a mate to guard the armory, Fitzjames immediately suggests Des Voeux, unaware that he’s already under Hickey’s sway. In 1.04, too, Fitzjames entrusts him with guarding Silna on her first night aboard the ship. It’s an echo (perhaps an unintentional one) of the real Fitzjames’s regard for the real Des Voeux — a regard which inadvertently doomed the younger man by securing his spot on the expedition in the first place, and which, in the show’s version of events, is all the more bittersweet in light of his eventual betrayal.

There’s an echo, too, of Des Voeux’s training aboard the Excellent that shows in his facility with artillery, maths, and calculations. In 1.02, he leads the party to the cairn so accurately that Gore says he deserves a prize for his orienteering, and in 1.05, we see him performing calculations to determine atmospheric pressure based on the speed of sound. He’s put in charge of armed parties multiple times throughout the series, suggesting he’s capable with a rifle, if tragically twitchy-fingered at times. There’s even an echo of his service in China in the East Asian–esque shirt he wears as a costume at Carnivale.

I don’t know whether the writers had the real Des Voeux’s background in mind when coming up with ANY of this; for all I know, I’m reading too deep into coincidence. But it’s interesting all the same. And though I really don’t mind that the show decided to make Des Voeux rather unpleasant — that version is an interesting character in his own right — I can’t help but feel a new and surprisingly deep attachment to him now that I’ve spent so much time trying to get to know the real guy, who left so few traces other than his name on some papers and a fragment of shirt.

Sources

Edit, 11/9/18: In the original version of this post, I expressed a lot of concerns about whether Charles Frederick was truly of the Indiaville family of Des Voeuxes, as I couldn’t find any source other than Burke’s to verify it. Happily, it turns out that Sir George William Des Voeux, a governor of Fiji, Newfoundland, and Hong Kong, wrote the following to The Colonies and India on May 25, 1895:

“Being, to my great regret, unable to attend the celebration of the 50th anniversary of the departure of the Franklin Expedition, I venture to ask of your courtesy the permission to make known through your columns the fact that injustice has been done to the memory of one of the officers of that expedition by the misspelling of his name upon the memorial column in Waterloo Place. The officer in question was my brother, Charles Frederick Des Voeux, mate (subsequently promoted to lieutenant) in the Erebus, Sir John Franklin’s ship.”

G. William was definitely the son of Rev. Henry Des Voeux and a descendant of de Bacquencourt, and thus, despite all my reservations, it appears that Burke’s genealogy is indeed... correct! I’ve left my original discussion of Burke’s Peerage intact below, though, for anyone interested.

Original version of this section:

Most of the info in this post comes from one or more of the following:

The Voyage of the ‘Fox’ in Arctic Seas (Sir Francis Leopold McClintock, 1859)

A Naval Biographical Dictionary (William Richard O’Byrne, 1849)

Papers and Despatches Relating to the Arctic Searching Expeditions of 1850 (James Mangles, 1852)

The National Maritime Museum

The Royal Navy Lists

These sources corroborate each other sufficiently that I feel pretty OK about the info gleaned from them, which primarily pertains to Des Voeux’s naval career. As mentioned up top, though, the only source I could find on Des Voeux’s ancestry and early life was Burke’s Peerage. At least four editions (of the editions I could find scans of) explicitly identify Rev. Henry Des Voeux’s second son as our Des Voeux. “Charles-Frederick, R.N., lieut. on board one of the ships of Sir John Franklin’s ill fated expedition” appears in the 1898, 1910, and 1914 editions; the 1907 edition reads “Charles Frederick, R.N. lost in Sir John Franklin's expedition.”

Burke’s isn’t necessarily wrong, but it’s definitely been known to make mistakes, and I really wanted to find another source verifying that our Charles Frederick was, indeed, of the Indiaville family, in case he could possibly have come from some other family also called Des Voeux. Basically, my concern has been: What if Burke’s just plain wrong? What if the idea that this lost member of an infamous expedition belonged to the Des Voeuxes of Indiaville was an invention erroneously conjured up later, simply because they happened to share a name?

Unfortunately, the genealogies and peerage lists I found were contradictory and/or glaringly incomplete. Even the ship’s musters from the Cornwallis, Endymion, etc., could have been immensely helpful here, as they sometimes list ages and even place of birth (though the Erebus’s manifest doesn’t list either for Des Voeux), but the National Archives hasn’t yet digitized the records from the relevant ships and years.

Another frustration is an inconsistency — or, rather, a lack of detail — in Burke’s itself. While some editions explicitly link him to the expedition, many earlier ones (such as 1845, ’48, ’50, ’58, ’60, ’61, ’65, and ’68) refer to Rev. Henry’s second son simply as... “Frederick, R.N.” No “Charles”; no further detail. I’d feel much more secure if a full “Charles-Frederick” had appeared in editions printed before the Franklin Expedition became so infamous. Even these earlier editions, though, all at least note that “Frederick Des Voeux” was Royal Navy — R.N. — and they shorten his siblings’ names as well. Henry Dalrymple is listed simply as “Henry”; Charles Champagne is just “Charles.” So “Frederick” could, conceivably, likewise be standing in for two given names, e.g. Charles Frederick. And something must have happened to Frederick by 1894 to render him dead, missing, or otherwise ineligible for a title, as the baronetcy skips straight from Henry Dalrymple (5th Baronet) to Charles Champagne (6th).

In the end... Who knows. I can’t prove he was of the Des Voeuxes of Indiaville; I can’t prove he wasn’t. For what it’s worth, though, I can tell you that like 50% of the guys in the Indiaville family were apparently named Charles and/or Frederick. If nothing else, our boy would fit right in.

#charles frederick des voeux #franklin expedition #the terror #sebastian armesto #james fitzjames #george hodgson #des voeux #the longest post nobody asked for #my meta #history #meta #op #stephan stanley #dr stanley #charles des voeux

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alley-cat-sunflower · 5 years

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Status update!

Hello! Alley here, finally!

You may have noticed I’ve vanished from the face of the earth lately. In case my terse and sporadic update posts aren’t enough to tell you why I’ve been so inaccessible, I think it’s about time I give you something to explain what I’ve been doing, and maybe even a promise to come back online sooner rather than later. (But it’s gonna get a little long, so I’m throwing this under a cut. I apologize to those of you who can’t see it.)

As most of you know, I’m in my last semester of college. More importantly, I’m so far along in said last semester that I literally just have to take one final a week from today—the day before graduation, actually—and then I’m home fucking free after five years of torment!!!

Anyway, the whole semester has been super busy, what with holding down an internship and three classes all required for graduation (and that pressure has been real). One of those classes was “Math and the Human Imagination”, which unsurprisingly involved analyzing imaginary numbers. I’m ashamed to admit that despite my favorite professor’s best efforts, the course did absolutely nothing to help my understanding of mathematics. Another of those classes was “Bollywood and Globalization”, which is the one in which I still have a final. I have hopes that I’ll do well, if only because I’ve enjoyed the course enough to pay attention.

The last class was my “Senior Synthesis”, which purports itself the crowning experience of a Liberal Studies major, in which you can basically do whatever the fuck you want as long as you can present it to the class in the form of a speech/slideshow, a poster, and an essay. Because there are roughly three things I care about, I chose one of them and had an unironically marvelous time drawing a bazillion connections between BTS’s Bangtan Universe and Hermann Hesse’s Demian. I was scheduled to present in the first possible week, in mid-April, and spent 24 total hours out of the weekend before pulling together my presentation (because I’m broken and think that’s fun—I’d have spent just as much time on it even if I hadn’t had to for the project). As part of it, I made a six-minute video you can watch here if you like, which showcases some of the specific connections I examined.

Speaking of BTS in conjunction with April, though, that brings me to their new album. And can I just say, holy shit. I still wasn’t over “Intro: Persona” by the time the whole thing dropped, so every time I listen to the album, I’m shook all over again to this day. Thanks to timezone shenanigans, my mother the ARMY had me wake her at 1:45am on April 12 so we could be awake for the festivities. We saw the “Boy with Luv” MV the moment it came out… and then proceeded to watch it with and without subs about five times. While that was going on, I bought Map of the Soul: Persona on iTunes the second it was available and burned a CD. After that, my mom suggested going out to a deserted parking lot and blasting it in the car so we could enjoy it at a decent volume, since we didn’t want to wake the neighbors. So we did, and let me tell you, hearing “Dionysus” for the first time at full volume in the dead of night can’t be beat. That whole adventure is a memory I’ll cherish forever.

There have been a lot of those lately, especially in conjunction with BTS, and this brings me to how absolutely insane this past week has been. I’d like to lead into last weekend by stating in no uncertain terms that I owe @lightningswrath my very life for managing to land us tickets to not one, but both BTS concerts at the Rose Bowl this past weekend. They were both indescribably beautiful, though the second one in particular was perfect—not least because I actually remembered to eat that day, so I was no longer trying to process overwhelming emotions on an empty stomach. However, the experience wasn’t as surreal as I expected; I did feel elevated, but also oddly grounded. Despite their awe-inspiring stage presence and sense of showmanship, the members are also so genuine as people that I couldn’t help but accept their presence in front of me.

(Incidentally, if you’re an ARMY and haven’t looked up Namjoon’s speech on 190505, please do; the man is a true sage and I feel incredibly honored to have heard such profound words in person. The only reason I didn’t record it myself was because I was so absorbed in the moment.)

Alas, every silver lining has its cloud. This past weekend has given me an unforgettable set of experiences in the best way, but I am most definitely suffering the consequences of not being able to do any schoolwork. We couldn’t leave until after my class a week ago, and we had to come back early enough on Monday that I could make it to my last math class and explain two chapters of a book I didn’t understand. On Tuesday, I had to attend the last day of my internship and then design and construct a poster, which I finished on Wednesday morning before completing a three-page evaluation of my math class—which was supposed to have been due on Monday, but I completely spaced it out—and then presenting my poster.

But That’s Not All. Yesterday, I wrote and turned in another three-page evaluation, this time of my internship, before immediately heading home to work on my synthesis essay, which was supposed to be 15 pages. Thankfully, I actually enjoy writing about all the crazy-detailed connections between BTS and Demian, but I still only finished it in the nick of time today (at a whopping 24 pages, not counting the works cited, because I can’t be brief when I’m busy being passionate) before heading to class. I had just gotten home from that when I started writing this post, and I’ll have to leave in another couple hours to go out dancing with some friends. After that, as mentioned, I only have one final left, and then I’ll have a degree in Liberal Studies with an English minor.

Which begs the question several people have already asked me: what next?

Thankfully, my internship has provided me with a ready answer, because they decided to ask me to come in as a paid part-timer over the summer! So I can at least tell people I’m going to be continuing my foray into the field of editing and publishing. But aside from career-related stuff, I also have a lot of things I’d like to do now that I won’t have academia weighing me down anymore. Enough that I can honestly make an entire list of… uh, goals? wishes? for the rest of the year:

Finish some of my ongoing fanfiction

Work on some of my original fiction

Find more time to write and post in general

Dance more often (and learn some BTS choreography)

Get into more K-pop (VAV, Monsta X, SHInee, etc.)

Help my mother sell stuff on eBay and pay back the $500 I owe her

Buy more BTS albums/merch and FFXV’s Episode Ardyn

Play and/or replay more video games, esp. otome

Plan my move up north with @chibitorra

Move all my stuff out of my dad’s house

Sort through everything I own and get rid of half of it

Pick up my Japanese studies again

Maybe start learning Korean???

Watch more Bollywood films

Read more Hesse, Jung, and Nietzsche

I also intend to resume some of my online activities and become more socially accessible again, but I doubt I will ever be as active or consistent in any fandoms as I once was, although I hope to compensate for this by writing more for them. Given that my former fever-pitch of online activity was born of a desire to escape reality, and by now I’ve finally found more of a place in the real world, this is most certainly for the best.

Anyway, that’s the tale of where I’ve been, where I am now, and where I’m headed next! I hope that gives you something to work with if you’ve been curious about what I’ve been up to. Thank you so much for reading, and I hope life has been kind to you too!

#personal

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the-pen-and-the-stethoscope · 5 years

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One month (and a bit) later...

Hey y’all!

So.....a little over a month ago was match day and I know that I kinda went MIA suddenly right afterwards and haven’t really checked in. Since I’m officially leaving tomorrow for my graduation present with my mom (we are going hiking in Peru before heading to a resort in Mexico!), I wanted to give as brief an update and fyi about match and the last month as possible. (Spoiler: it’s not super brief) Buckle in guys!

Match Day: Ok, so as you guys who have been around for awhile know that this day is a big deal for me! I have been legit watching match day videos on youtube since I was in college, imagining that moment when I would open my own envelope. Since I’ve been anticipating the day so much I volunteered this year to basically organize and put on the entire match day ceremony, complete with streamers, balloons, special walk up music for everyone, and personalized posters that everyone could sign and then take home. So leading up to match day I was honestly most worried about how the day would go in terms of the event than what my actual envelope would say. This was probably because I was feeling pretty confident. I had gotten good feedback from my top three choices since interviewing, I really thought I had it in the bag.

Then my name was called and I walked up and gave my envelope to my sister and as she was reading out my match I looked over her shoulder and my heart just dropped because there on the piece of paper was my fifth choice.

I wasn’t disappointed so much as in shock. My first choice I knew was a bit of a long shot - a rural program with only two spots. But when I emailed them to say I was ranking them first the PD emailed me back a picture of her newborn son. (It seemed like a good sign at the time!) I was worried about my second choice until I got an email the week that rank lists were due basically saying “keep us in mind when you rank, we like you” so after that I was thinking okay that’s gunna happen. (On match day I woke up and looked at the brochure for that program to prepare myself for that reality in case I didn’t get my first choice.) My third choice was the place I did my sub-i. I mean I literally was like “there is no way I won’t match here.” When I was there multiple residents and faculty talked about how they wanted me to come there for residency. And when I emailed them after interviewing the PD called me matching there “a win-win”.

So wow - I dropped to my fifth choice. I cried immediately after sitting back down. I cried again after the ceremony when my advisor came up to talk to me. I went home and cried again while showering. I cried again on my couch with my best friend as I told her I didn’t even want to go to our match day party (that I had literally planned). But thank god for good friends (guys, keep in touch with your non-med school friends during med school). She stood up, popped open a bottle of champagne and said “you are going to that party”. And I did. And honestly I’m so happy I did. Because everyone came up to me saying congrats and omg I’m so excited for you and omg you’re going to be in SUCH a cool place next year and omg can I visit you next year and on and on.

So I ended match day with some conflicted feelings.

The next few weeks: There was a lot of processing, a lot of celebrating, a little bit of work, and a lot of planning.

Processing went like this - I am of two minds (I use the present tense because these things continue to shift and change even now). My first mind is positive. I remember that I had an amazing interview day at this program. That it has strong OB. That it is in a really cool city that is still in New England. That it has a cool mix of rural and urban exposure. That the residents were awesome. That I’ll be close to my family for three more years. That I almost ranked it as high as #3 on my list. My second mind is negative. I feel gutted that I went across the country to do my sub-i, worked my butt off, felt like I made real connections with people, and then didn’t end up there. I imagine all the things in my life I was looking forward to at my top choices that now will never happen. I feel rejected. I feel not good enough. Basically any insecurity I ever had during med school came flooding back. Why did all my friends going into family medicine get their top choice and not me? Slowly I’m leaning more towards the positive mindset, but it sucks that this blow to my confidence had to come just as I was wrapping up med school. Just as I was really starting to feel sure about myself.

Celebrating looked like this - besides the party the night of there were dinners out with family the rest of the weekend. A week trip to Miami with two of my best friends from med school. And of course, all leading up to my big trip with my mom this month!! More celebrating to come I’m sure.

Work went like this - I had one two week rotation to finish up post-match day and then on April 5th I walked out of med school hospital for the last time as a med student! I AM DONE WITH REQUIREMENTS FOR MEDICAL SCHOOL! Technically, I am an MD. Besides the fact that no one has given me a piece of paper yet.

Planning was a lot of this - I found an apartment in residency city (ahhh it feels so cool to say that!). And I came home and went through my parents house to pick out the furniture I want and pack up childhood things and purge my closet of clothes. Then there was a lot of planning and organizing for the actual move and when to get a truck and what day I can move in. Then there was a lot of planning for my big trip with my mom!

And so here I am on the other side. I have 37 days until I graduate from medical school. HOLY HELL WHAT A FUCKING RIDE. I am so happy to have had the medblr community by my side the whole time. Y’all are a blessing!

Here is a gif of @taylorswift who made me cry tonight as a reward for getting through this long post:

#medblr #med school #family medicine #i think i'm almost a pgy1 #match day #match day 2019 #ms4

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sierradorotheia · 5 years

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CURRENT FAVES vol 3

So I know it’s been REALLY long since the last ~current faves~ post. It’s been six months since I moved out of the North and back down South... but I just never found the time to write something remotely “worth-while” (despite the unemployment back in the Fall!) but here it is anyway. I am also thinking about doing a “Life Update” post of some sort, since I have a post on my Drafts that’s been sitting there after I moved out of Yellowknife.

Aaand... without any much further ado...

*** MAKEUP ***

Dior Backstage Foundation ~ this started as a sample from when I had a makeover done at Sephora. I absolutely love this foundation’s longevity and that it has a satin finish. Lately I’ve been steering clear of matte foundations because of the season. I get compliments with my flawless face with this foundation. The only thing I dislike about it is the fact that it’s not pump; for something high-end, you would think it would have a different, less-messy packaging. But overall, I wish this foundation is not expensive enough for me to use all the time.

CoverFX Highlighting Drops ~ again, another deluxe sample I got from Sephora. I’m still using the sample I got actually- and man this liquid highlighter is just the stuff of the goddesses. I swear I always look GLOWY and naturally radiant with these drops. I saw some videos where people mix a drop or two with their foundations, but I use it on my cheekbones, bridge of my nose and my chine. I don’t even have to use a highlighting powder after! I would definitely buy the full size when I run out, but this deluxe sample bottle is lasting me ages.

Charlotte Tilburry Hollywood Contour ~ this cream contour stick is so worth the splurge. I had the Sephora makeup artist use this on me when I had a makeover done, and I just knew I got to have it. It was out of stock for the longest time in-store and online and I finally took the plunge when it went back in stock on the day Sephora was having the 20% off event. This contour is so good on its own--- on a very important night-out. It’s very natural-looking and long-lasting. I can’t stress enough how much I love this product, and I also wish I can use this all the time if not for the price point!

Sephora Lip Plumper in Nude ~ so... I’m not really a believer in lip plumpers and stuff. I just don’t think it ever works, not that I’ve tried one before. I was on my lunch break at work and watching itsjudytime on YouTube and she featured this as one of her all-time faves. I checked the website and I assumed it wouldn’t be too pricey since it’s a Sephora brand, and I was right. My office is inside a mall with a Sephora so I picked one up on the same day. I can’t say it works per se but I like the tingly effect it has (like it’s actually doing something lol) and since I am never a fan of glossy lips, I can make an exception with this. The nude colour is so universal and perfect for me!

Artistry Highlighter ~ bestfriend got this for me for Christmas, and while I am not familiar with the Artistry brand, I was excited to try this (I mean, you can never have so many high-lighters right?!). My favourite is the gold and pink highlights as they have really natural look and finish to it, and the fact that it stays put all-day is really a plus.

No POREblem Primer Touch in Sol ~ I haven’t bought a full-sized primer in a while just because I have so many deluxe samples I haven’t yet exhausted, but this primer is so satiny, and silky.. love the scent and the way it applies.

*** SKIN CARE/HAIR CARE ***

Mario Badescu Face Mist - Green Tea and Aloe Vera ~ you might already know I’m quite fond of the Mario Badescu line- and how exciting that Sephora carries MB now, too! I immediately purchased the Green Tea and Aloe and Lavender face mists. I loved the GT one but not so much the lavender; the latter has a scent that I kind of don’t like, and I wish I bought a smaller bottle to start. Now I’m just miserably trying to finish it at work... but the GT is very refreshing, very soothing!

Lush Body Wash ~ I am partially embarrassed to say that for a couple of months, I was a body wash-sample hoarder at at least four locations in my City. Like... I would go from stores to stores and shamelessly get at least two samples of body wash (most times, without even purchasing anything), and they were generous with their samples, too! I feel so bad for abusing the system... but I finally took the plunge and bought full-sized bottles. The ones I like by Lush are : Sleepy, Happy Hippy, American Cream, Olive Branch, and Rose Jam. They all smell amazing, very bubbly... and I liked having variations in my shower so I can use whatever suits my mood. It adds to the excitement of showering. lol L'Occitane Foot Cream ~ I know it’s still sub-zero temps outside but... sandals season is just around the corner! I finally ditched Soap and Glory’s foot cream and while I was on a hunt for new one, I stumbled upon this product on Sephora and just basically trusted the buyer reviews. I like how creamy this is, a little goes a long way for sure compared to S&G... and it has echinacea extract, which apparently helps wick away foot odour. So far I’m liking this, and I don’t even have to use the foot board all the time before applying this foot cream.

Bath and Body Works Smoothing Body Scrub ~ I’ve always been a fan of BBW scrubs because of how fine they are, they smell SOOO good, and they actually do the job of exfoliating and keeping my skin smooth and supple. Right now I have the Comfort and Love scents in my shower, and I am still waiting for the Energize one to be available in-store. This scrubs are so perfect post-waxing or post-shaving.

Redken All-Soft Shampoo & Conditioner ~ this was the shampoo and conditioner used by my hairdresser during my last haircut appointment, so I decided to purchase a full bottle to take home. It lives up to its claim of all-soft. My hair does not look dull, and the softness and silkiness is almost instant and last until the day after.

BrioGeo Scalp Revival Shampoo/Conditioner/Scalp Drops ~ I was on the fence about including these on the current favourites since I have only used this three times exactly, but I just used it today so I figured I’d tell you what I thought about it. I use the three together of course, and while they recommend you use the products 2-3 times a week, I have only been using them every two weeks or so, just because I don’t think it actually cleanses the hair and especially after a workout, I would love that clean feeling on my hair. So from what I noticed, the shampoo and conditioner combo sort of weighs my hair down, but I think that’s part of the process. It’s a treatment, so I would understand how it won’t make your hair feel fab right after usage. It has a cooling effect from the peppermint right after rinsing and I LIVE FOR THAT. It feels amazing, soothing, calming... you name it. I can still feel it now and it’s been three hours since I washed my hair. I just have to keep using it I guess, but I don’t know if I’m ready to take the plunge and buy the pricey full-sized bottles!

Hempz Body Lotion ~ you can tell I’ve been using this lotion for quite sometime lol... I really love the scent of this lotion. So clean... so subtle. And it smells like the lotions they have at the nail spa that they apply to my hands after my manicure.

Burberry Her ~ this is my current scent, and God knows it took me forever to change scents. First time I tried this perfume out, I thought it was too sweet. But I love how it smells shortly after. It’s very feminine... and I don’t even mind that because this is Burberry’s new scent, there might be tons of other women wearing the same scent.

Vasanti Face Scrub ~ this item was in my FabFitFun box way back when, and after I ran out of my ExfoliKate (and refusing to repurchase unless I used up all the samples I have), I decided to finally give this a shot. I am all for the fine microbreads this scrub has, and it does leave my face bright and smooth in the morning.

Mount Lai Rose Quartz Face Roller ~ I’ve been wanting to try this product for the longest time, and then I forgot about it... and Sephora began carrying Mount Lai face rollers and I knew I just have to pull the trigger. My only regret is not buying the bigger size, as I did not know there was such, but this mini-size does the trick just as well. I pop this in the fridge and I just use it at night after my night time skincare. It’s very relaxing, and you just want to keep doing it over and over. You have to make sure you know how to properly use it though! Watch the video they have on the Sephora website here

*** MISCELLANEOUS ***

Bergamot Waters Three-Wick Candle ~ finally, a home scent that the boyfriend and I agreed on! We have this as a plug-in, and the candles, and has very nice scent that’s not over powering.

Essential Oils ~ I know I’m a little too late on the essential oils wagon, but we finally tried this out with our humidifier and while I’m not sure if it’s really doing anything health-wise, it helps me sleep better so that’s kinda good.

Anytime Fitness Workout App ~ I stopped doing CrossFit workouts since late January, and being in the CrossFit bubble for over two years, I really don’t know what to do at the gym without any direction. I decided to check out the free Anytime Fitness app that came with my gym membership, and I’m quite happy with the results so far. I feel like I’m pushing harder this way, and at my own pace so I feel as though I am less prone to injure myself. The App has different workouts every 8 weeks so you can switch things up and confuse your muscles!

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hokkaidodo-blog · 7 years

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an untitled post - because it’s 2am and my brain feels like trifle

First of all, how on earth has it been longer than two weeks since I last posted? And more importantly, how have I been living in Japan for longer than a month already? It seems like I’ve only just arrived but then also it seems like I’ve been here forever. After a month, I’m surprised at how much you can settle in to a new place relatively easy. Even after two weeks or so, I no longer find myself awkwardly sitting in a doughnut shop in Sapporo underground station, politely declining many free refills of coffee just so that I could hide in the corner and use the Wi-Fi to desperately try and figure out which of the station’s bountiful exits would lead me to campus (it seemed so easy when I was with someone else); nor do I feel like a confused and terrified rabbit in the market when 1) I can barely fit down the isles because I am not a petite Japanese person, or when 2) I have borderline zero idea about what to buy/look for/cook with regards to Japanese vegetables/meat/condiments/toiletries.

Being in the tail end of Autumn at the moment, everything is stunning. I’ve never seen trees with such beautifully coloured leaves, Hokkaido University being one of the most famous spots in Japan for tree-viewing with its “golden leaf” festival. It’s definitely getting colder and I can feel that winter is going to hit us running faster than a middle-aged lady at the Boxing Day 5am Next sale. I’m excited to see the Hokkaido winter (Hokkaidonian? Hokkaidan?) Japanese winter, but especially up here in the north, there is no going back once it strikes. The feeling that we will have snow from (probably) the end of October to mid-February is something that yes, I was very aware of before I came to Hokkaido. However, to someone who is used to two or three days (three being ambitious here) of ‘snow’ a year – snow that abolishes all hope of any form of public transport running or schools being open, forcing elderly folk to manically panic buy the entire stock of Hovis bread and twenty-four pints of milk from the local Costcutter to serve them through said nuclear winter, just to find that a day later everything is fine and people are left wondering if the snow even happened – it is something that you cannot easily prepare for.

Fun trivia fact: The yellow leafed tree is called a “ginko” and translates as “silver apricot”. Yeah, move over Alan Titchmarsh.

I feel so scatty because it’s been so long since I wrote something and there’s hardly been a day where I haven’t been busy with something, so this is going to be a mish-mashed “look at a few of the things I’ve been doing! Aren’t they fabulous” kind of post. Apologies in advance.

MOUNT MOIWA

Saturday. Planned to hike up a mountain close to my dorm to see a beautiful sunset and a breath-taking of the marvellous city below. Woke up. Cloudier than a cup of tea made by someone who puts the milk in without taking the teabag out first. (FYI – sorry in advance, but if you do this you are a cretin who should have their tea-making duties revoked immediately.) Typical. However, we took the rope way up to the top of the mountain and after nearly being blown over the sides of the mountain into the abyss, the sun fortunately came out and the clouds filtered away. The view was stunning and like something out of a hand-drawn art film. There was a bell at the top that lovers are meant to ring to signify their commitment and love for one another, so, because I am in love with myself, (insert RuPaul quote here) here is a pic of me being apparently super twee and declaring my commitment to being a mega-tourist. (The pic also features my raincoat and umbrella, which to the great delight of my new international friends are both incredibly British things and therefore a prime and hilarious source of glorious banter.)

HOT SPRINGS!

In the middle of the beautiful Hōheikyō dam, surrounded by hundreds more autumnal trees, we found a stunning natural onsen, or hot spring. There are onsen in the city which are inside and are like giant communal hot tubs where you can relax, however what was so beautiful about this particular bath house was that the baths were all filled with naturally occurring, mineral loaded water, heated and pumped straight from the earth. Bathing culture is something that I find quite interesting in Japan. Being British, there is the stereotype that we are prude with our nakedness, but when you go to an onsen you must forget any embarrassment or shame you might have, shed your shyness, and just embrace ‘the Japanese way.’ This is the belief that old or young, fat or thin, rich or poor; when you are in the onsen, you are there to relax, to appreciate your life and the nature around you and to be free of any social constraints, no matter what your walk of life may be. It was quite liberating and surprisingly easy to be so open with myself and my body. It was also interesting to see fathers bringing their young sons to the onsen for the first time, teaching them Japanese behaviours and etiquette and as such, there was a peaceful and very comfortable atmosphere here.

Obviously, picture taking was forbidden inside, so here is a pic from the website. Imagine this but at night, with lots of paper lanterns and orange leaves!

It’s hard to find a photo that shows the beauty of the springs!

And here’s some random thoughts and pics before I wrap this post up for today:

1) Went to an owl café with the most beautiful owls. Found a new friend and then got told we look awfully similar.

It’s the eyebrows.

2) I don’t know how or why this became a thing, but I’m apparently collecting photos of myself next to any mascots or statues I find. Lol Japan.

None have been as soul-penetratingly scary as the melon-bear. Yet.

3) If the light at the pedestrian crossing is red, nobody will EVER walk. Ever. No cars have passed by for ten minutes? 2am standing in the rain with no coat? People will still wait for the green man until they cross. It’s just the rule, man.

4) Japanese food = the absolute best. Gaining 15 stone = not so great.

5) Conversely, Japanese cheese (more specifically, the lack of) = the worst. Mumma, if you’re reading this then please send emergency supplies. Mental stability maintained by mayonnaise and cheese is dwindling fast. Help.

That’s all my ramblings for now. I’ll try and keep updating this more often if I don’t lose my fingers in the sub-zero temperatures or go into hiding and become a recluse due to lack of a good British cuppa. As always, thank you for reading!

ロス

Bonus pics:

Just a human and his owl.

I have nothing to say about this.

Story: When walking through a forest path to reach the mountain, you will see these stone statues lining the walkway. Every single one adorned with a hand knitted blanket or wearing a crocheted scarf or shawl of some kind. These statues are of Jizō – the god who is the guardian protector of children who have passed away too young. Just as Jizō protects the spirits of these children and looks after them once they have left this world, the idols are also protected by gestures of Japanese people who will hand-make scarves and hats to protect Jizō from the elements in the harsh winter. The original Japanese folk-tale tells of an old man and old woman whose grandson had passed, living in the mountains with barely enough food and resources to make-do for themselves. However, despite this they still selflessly placed their own hats on the statues during a snow storm to keep them warm. In turn, it is said that the statues came to life and delivered food to the old couple to thank them for their generosity. The old couple had so much food that they returned it to Jizō to continue the cycle of gratefulness and gift-giving. The tradition of gift-giving is an ancient Japanese custom and something that is very typical of Japanese life.

Maruyama Zoo

#japan #travel #hokkaido #year abroad #study abroad #onsen #winter #autumn #leaves #mountain #mount moiwa #hiking #exploring #exchange student #travel blog #ramblings #sapporo

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gadgetsrevv · 5 years

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Czech Republic 2-1 England, Euro 2020 qualifier match report

England‘s bid to qualify for Euro 2020 hit a major bump in the road as they suffered a first qualifying defeat in a decade with a 2-1 loss in the Czech Republic.

Gareth Southgate’s side remain top of Group A but level on points with the Czechs, who have played one game more, with three matches remaining.

Of England’s last qualifying defeat, a 1-0 reverse in Ukraine ten years ago yesterday, nine of the starting XI have retired, with only Wayne Rooney and Aaron Lennon still playing, illustrating just how unexpected this was, particularly given the 5-0 win over the same opponents at Wembley in March.

Shortly before kick-off, reports emerged of angry clashes between England supporters and Czech police in Prague city centre and it was to prove a troubling night on and off the pitch as England peaked in the third-minute, when Harry Kane put them in front from the penalty spot.

The Czechs hit back immediately through Jakub Brabec and veteran substitute Zdenek Ondrasek – a 30-year-old on his international debut – scored five minutes from time.

(Getty Images)

Southgate made three changes from the barmy 5-3 win over Kosovo last month, with Mason Mount making his full England debut ahead of club-mate Ross Barkley and Kieran Trippier and Danny Rose preferred to Trent Alexander-Arnold and Ben Chilwell at full-back.

Centre-half Michael Keane was a fortunate to keep this place after a calamitous performance against the Kosovans at St. Mary’s.

The opening three minutes here, at least, suggested another thrashing was in the offing when Kane’s gorgeous flick-around-the-corner released Sterling and the winger surged into the box before having his heels swiped by Lukas Masopust as he checked back.

Kane, who missed from the spot against Kosovo, fired the penalty straight down the middle for his 27th England goal, taking him level with David Platt as their 12th all-time leading scorer.

(Action Images via Reuters)

Far from opening the floodgates again, England’s lead lasted all of five minutes and it was a measure of their dreadful defending that Jakub Jantko and Vladimir Coufal both had openings in the seconds before Brabec bundled home a corner at the back post. Kosovo’s second-half fightback at St. Mary’s raised serious questions about the quality of England’s defending and the centre-half’s simple finish and the build-up was another black mark against Southgate’s rearguard.

It took England until the 33rd-minute to launch another attack of note – a blocked effort for Kane – as the hosts proved the equaliser was no fluke by taking command of the first-half.

Using their extra man in midfield, the Czechs picked their way through England and frequently found space in the final third, where Keane continued to look out of his depth at this level.

(AP)

England were particularly vulnerable at set-pieces, once such a great strength for this Southgate side, and centre-forward Patrick Schick and Jan Boril both went close with headers either side of the left-back’s tame shot straight at Jordan Pickford.

Recognising England’s total lack of control, Southgate made a tactical change at half-time, switching to a familiar 4-1-2-3 system, with Mount dropping beside Jordan Henderson.

Any suggestion Jaroslav Silhavy’s side were content with a draw looked unfounded within five minutes of the restart when holding midfielder Tomas Soucek raced into space by fired over with his left foot. England did improve with the change of formation, however, and Kane, lurking on the left wing, found Sterling with a brilliant first-time ball in the 57th-minute, only for goalkeeper Vaclik to push the ball away from the advancing winger.

It was now end-to-end, and two minutes after Sterling’s opening, Masopust forced Pickford into a acrobatic one-handed save from a dipping shot from 25 yards.

(AP)

England also had reason to rue fine margins when Sancho just could not bring down another fine Kane pass before the captain was inches away from connecting with Sterling’s cross.

It became a question of when rather than if Southgate would make changes and, with 20 minutes, he remaining he introduced Marcus Rashford and Barkley for Mount and Jadon Sancho, who both failed to sparkle – underlining that this young team remains a work in progress.

It was the Czechs’ first change five minutes earlier that was to prove decisive, however, when Masopust burst into the area from the right and picked out 30-year-old Ondrasek, who passed home from 12 yards. Rose, the left-back, was floored during the goal but the referee waved play on.

England now have to pick themselves up for Monday’s potentially-volatile trip to Bulgaria.

Relive the game with Standard Sport’s LIVE blog!

Live Updates

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ES COVERAGE

2019-10-11T21:05:55.983Z

That concludes our coverage tonight as England fall to a disappointing defeat in Prague.

Head over to the homepage for more reaction and we hope you’ll join us again on Monday for the Euro 2020 qualifier against Bulgaria.

Bye for now!

2019-10-11T21:02:37.296Z

England manager Gareth Southgate certainly isn’t pulling any punches tonight. He spoke to ITV Sport:

“We’ve had a lot of credit over the years but tonight we didn’t do enough. The performance wasn’t good enough. We should’ve got a draw probably, but the goal we conceded was typical of the chances we gave away throughout the night.

“There are things we can look back on, but collectively there wasn’t enough good individual performances tonight. We tried to change shape in first half which wasn’t working and I think we looked more of a threat in the second and had enough good chances to win in truth.”

On set pieces:

“We’re very strong at those usually and we knew we needed to be at full tilt to deal with Czech Republic. That’s an area that we need to be stronger in to deal with them.”

2019-10-11T20:53:38.000Z

Here’s Kane speaking to ITV:

“I think it was down to us. It was a perfect start to an away game. We were sloppy with the ball, we didn’t move it as quickly and we weren’t pressing as we normally do.

“The second half was better, we had a couple of chances to put the game to bed and we didn’t and unfortunately we gave one away at the end.

“Every away game in Europe is difficult. They had the crowd behind them, sometimes the pitch is not as easy to play, but that’s no excuse. It’s a bit of a wake-up call but we’re in a good position.

“There’s still stuff to work on for sure. We gave the ball away too cheaply and we’ll have to go away and look at it. There’s no need to panic and we’ll go again on Monday.”

2019-10-11T20:45:43.786Z

England captain Harry Kane has been speaking to ITV Sport, admitting the defeat in Prague is a “wake-up” call for the players.

We’ll have the full reaction shortly…

FULL TIME

2019-10-11T20:37:07.356Z

FULL TIME | Czech Republic 2-1 England

Ondrasek’s late strike condemns the Three Lions to a disappointing defeat in Prague and it’s their first in a European qualifier for 10 years.

Work to do ahead of their next game against Bulgaria on Monday.

2019-10-11T20:36:04.133Z

90+5 mins: It’s four on two and Kopic should score, but he fires straight at Pickford.

YELLOW CARD

2019-10-11T20:34:49.050Z

90+2 mins: Henderson catches Darida with a stray arm and picks up a yellow card.

2019-10-11T20:31:38.600Z

90 mins: Four minutes of added time for England to find an equaliser.

SUBS

2019-10-11T20:31:16.726Z

89 mins: Masopust, who has been impressive tonight, comes off for Jaromir Zrmhal.

SUBS

2019-10-11T20:30:26.116Z

88 mins: Southgate sends on Tammy Abraham for Rice as he looks to salvage a point.

2019-10-11T20:28:21.000Z

GOAL

85 mins: The 10-year run could be coming to an end!

There’s absolutely no pressure on Masopust as he’s allowed to cut it back to Ondrasek who is completely unmarked and he slots it past Pickford.

Terrible defending from England and looks like Keane was the culprit there for losing his man.

England heading towards their first defeat in a qualifier since October 2009 – 44 games ago.

GOAL!

2019-10-11T20:27:24.043Z

GOAL! | Czech Republic 2-1 England | Zdenek Ondrasek 85′

2019-10-11T20:26:29.976Z

84 mins: Ondrasek’s eyes light up when he wins a 50-50 with Trippier but slips at the vital moment.

2019-10-11T20:25:31.360Z

83 mins: No matter what happens from here on, England have definitely improved in the second half but it’s fair to say they haven’t been good enough to win tonight.

That could still change, mind…

SUBS

2019-10-11T20:24:10.056Z

82 mins: Jankto makes way for Jan Kopic

2019-10-11T20:22:57.690Z

81 mins: Kane with a golden chance!

Barkley swings a stunning ball into the path of Kane but his first touch takes him away from goal and his tame effort is saved by Vaclik.

YELLOW CARD

2019-10-11T20:21:06.463Z

79 mins: Boril just shoves Sterling to the ground and picks up a yellow card for his troubles.

England with a free-kick in a dangerous position here.

2019-10-11T20:19:02.816Z

77 mins: Great move from the hosts and it’s Kral who exchanges a one-two with Darida before launching a fierce strike, which Pickford does well to palm away.

ES COVERAGE

2019-10-11T20:17:27.000Z

Dan Kilpatrick at the Sinobo Stadium

“It feels like one moment of quality will be the difference here and there is certainly no guarantee it will come from England. The visitors are getting closer, with Kane inches away from connecting with Sterling’s cross just now but it is no surprise that Southgate has called for Barkley and Rashford for Mount and Sancho.”

2019-10-11T20:14:47.000Z

73 mins: Rose takes a risk after holding the shirt of Soucek and has a little nibble at his ankle in the penalty area. The Czech striker goes down rather theatrically and slams the turf in frustration when the goal kick is awarded.

Can’t see the live blog? Click here for the desktop version.

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#Uncategorized #Czech Republic #england #Euro 2020 #Euro 2020 qualifying #Football #International Foo

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wztd · 5 years

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First and foremost I need to make this very clear: The local law enforcement has been very well notified about this situation and my family has a member of a federal agency that is aware of the situation as well. I know that Reddit likes to dive into stories posted on here sometimes, but please know that the situation is being taken care of as we speak.Secondly, I have been a lurker on Reddit for around three years now (only making an account a year ago though). I know that there’s a ton of trolls online who like to post things like these for a reaction. I have zero issue sending sub mods proof of this story, but only once things have been taken care of legally. But for the upmost safety of my family and the guidance from my lawyer, law enforcement, and family, I will only be posting the information I chose to share in this post for the time being. Please understand that.Now, what’s been going on...Less than half a year ago, my wife and I purchased what we consider our ‘dream home’. It’s exactly what we have been discussing about what we have wanted in our home to raise our family since we first started to get very serious as a couple. To paint the picture for you, it is a completely redone farmhouse that sits on a large amount of land. We have a very long driveway that takes you right up to the side of the house. The house can not be seen from the road we live on, simply just because of how far back and where the house sits.Our neighbors are a pretty good distances away from us. They are both an older couple and they both have been very vocal about how happy they are we are there. They have been great and could not have been more welcoming to me and my family during the initial move in process.My farmland is mostly behind the house, with only a little bit of it starting on the right side of the house, and then a few acres on the left side. On the left, past my property is kinda dead land. Where no one owns it or takes care of it. After my property ends, there is a huge amount of brush and grass built up and then there are a ton of large trees that scatter right up to my neighbors property. These trees are just a small patch of woods, but it is probably around an acre long.Behind my house is a very large barn. The barn isn’t far from the house at all. If I was to guess, it’s only probably around 50 feet behind. Even though the house is gorgeous after the major remodel the previous owners did to sell the house, the barn is in its original glory. It’s old and sorta falling apart. I have made it very clear to my daughter not to go in certain parts of the barn simply because I don’t trust the old wood to hold up.This barn is not locked ever. I just don’t have many belongings in it and also, I quickly realized that there’s a few places to get into the barn other than the front entrance, and they are very obvious spots just due to the wood breaking down and getting older and older. I’m sure that it was a nice barn in its glory days, but to me, and especially my wife, it’s a massive eye sore. It’s very large, but for the most part empty. I keep my riding lawn mower in there and I also have some miscellaneous tools in there as well. The barn is never used by us.Four days ago, my daughter came running into the house terrified. She’s under 13 years old (again, I’m choosing to be vague in some parts of this story just for protection) and I immediately thought that she was playing outside and walked up on a snake. But the fear in her eyes was, just different. She ran full force into my body and grabbed onto it with her life. She was hysterical. After a minute of trying to calm her down enough to get a word out of her, she told me that she found bones in the barn. I still didn’t think anything of this because I assumed that it was a coyote or dog or some other animal that took shelter in the barn during some time and died there and no one found it. I quickly asked her to show me.She guided me into the barn and pointed up to the ‘second floor’. I call it the ‘second floor’ because it’s not really that. It’s an overhang that it near the top of the barn that has a ladder going up to it. Not entirely sure what this used to be used for, but it’s not used by us at all. I also know that there’s zero chance that a dog or fox or other four legged guy stumbled upon this barn for shelter, since I’ve never seen a dog climb a high ladder.My ‘protective dad’ mode immediately turned on and I knew that something was up. A few months ago I decided to climb up there just out of curiosity and found a board that came up. The previous owners used to hide money throughout the house and property and I actually found a wad of cash hidden in this very board. But after that day, I never went back up there.Once I climbed up, I saw that my daughter found that board and lifted it up. But she did not find money. There was a trash bag with multiple bones inside of it tucked inside the hidden spot. This is hands down the scariest moment in my life. Because I know for a fact, that this has been placed there recently because when I went up there, it wasn’t there.I immediately made phone calls and the local police and crew came out. The entire property was overran with different types of vans and cars. My family was questioned very intensely for around two hours. Asking us every single question you could possibly ask someone. One of the officers pulled me aside and told me that they are in fact what I feared, human remains. After the longest day of my life, some information came out from the last owners that there was a problem with squatters in the woods on the edge of my property. I have never seen anyone roaming around or any sign of people going through my things.Looking back now, I made a very dangerous and idiotic mistake. I installed a camera system when we first moved in, but made the decision to only put cameras facing the front of the house and driveway. I figured there was no rush to get cameras for the back. Easily one of the biggest mistakes of my life, since we would have been able to have footage of the person going into my barn with this bag.When going through the camera footage with the officers, we discovered something extremely chilling that I somehow never saw, because up to this point there was no reason to check the cameras. Caught on the cameras exactly five days back, at the early hours in the morning, the side motion light of my house turned on and you could see multiple shadows on the ground of people walking by. But that absolutely is not the part that made me shiver and make this grown man almost fall to the ground in tears from fright.When going back to the footage, every night after the five day point leading up to this day, every single night, two men wearing some sort of identical masks and completely covered in clothes head to toe, would walk up my driveway and just stare at my house. The shortest time they stood there was a tiny bit over twenty minutes. The longest that they stood there was right under two hours. Standing there. Completely still. Just looking at my house. My hands are shaking so bad typing those sentences.The local police put us up in a motel around thirty minutes outside of town. Promising us that they would make routine drivebys every thirty minutes to check on us. Why they would not have officers posted up outside the room at all times, I have no idea and I am extremely upset with that decision.We were at the motel for two nights. The first night, I got zero minutes of sleep. I held my family extremely tight and watched the front door for every single second that night. The police did hold up to their promise of checking on us. On the second night, around the similar time of the two men caught on camera, we awoke to an extreme loud banging on my front door of the motel. I jumped up and went into panic mode. We waited in silence and nothing happened.I got on the phone and dialed my direct contact line to police. Within only a few moments, an officer was at the motel. We were taken to a new location and have been here for a few days. My family member in the federal agency has intervened and is personally taking care of us.This is an ongoing investigation and I can not give more detail than what I have given already in this post. My family is safe. I am safe. I again beg for the privacy of this situation outside of what was given in this post. I 100% will update on this account once everything has been taken care of and I will make sure to update you to tell you that we are safe once we are for good. My family is in extreme fear of the unknown. We have no idea why any of this is happening to us and even though it as all just started, we are so ready for this to be behind us.I spend all of my time just staring. Staring out into the distance waiting for those unknown men to come and take my life, my daughter, my wife, my unborn baby. Wherever they may be, I’m here. Waiting and ready for what’s next.Edit: I thank you all for your nice comments during this time. We needed to hear them. I just wanted to address two things very quickly.As I was expecting, some people are finding this story to be a fake and my account a fake. Perfectly normal reaction that I expected. Like mentioned though, I will happily give mods proof once I am given the okay to.A lot of detail have been removed from the story. Please keep in mind that this just happened to my family and I. There are still answers that we simply don’t have and I will not for an unknown amount of time. In order to not risk any leads, clues, anything, I just told the very stripped down version of what has happened to us. I see some comments about things not adding up. That makes perfect sense considering that there are portions left out, because right now at this moment, they simply just have to be. I hope you understand that. via /r/LetsNotMeet

#IFTTT #reddit

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