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farmerlesbian · 1 year

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where is the line between transmasc/genderweird lesbians and Men with a capital M? i dont think there really is one, but as a lesbian who straddles that line, people are constantly trying to shame me onto one side or the other and its exhausting. i think sometimes the ppl trying to protect our community by keeping men out end up targeting mostly ppl who are in between or overlapping categories and are typically trans, instead of like, Cisguys preying on dykes. its become a real problem in the community just being visibly trans or butch tbh

i don't think it's possible to articulate A Line. i agree with you and don't really have anything to add!

i'll just say what i've said before. it's fuzzy/blurry. the nuances and intricacies of someone's gender through the narrow slice the internet (on anon!) is not enough for a stranger to make any sort of call about! it's something that individuals with non-binary gender experiences gotta use their own discretion about. people should go about these things with a mindset of using their best judgement and engaging in good faith, instead of like, pushing the boundaries of what is "allowed". instead of seeking approval and validation, seek to look inside onesself and determine 'is this for me? is this space for me? do i genuinely feel like i'm intruding and pushing the boundaries or do i feel like i'm being pushed out and unjustly excluded?'. those are different feelings and while i can imagine it's hard to discern sometimes, maybe talking with your irl people you can figure it out. yeah sometimes you gotta ask a clarifying question here and there to the organizers of the space in question -- i certainly do when seeing (nonlesbian) events for "femmes" and stuff like that haha!

i'm sorry that you're dealing with people being shitty to you about straddling the line. i know i see it, people having this like compulsive need to find rules and permission and categories for everything, needing to push people into one box or another in order to make sense of them, to know how to see you and treat you. and it sucks! it sucks even more because the boxes are WRONG! it hurts and they don't get you.

for ME, when i say "no men" i mean people who are men period. no additions no explanations no complications. just a straight up man. a fully binary man, if you will. i do not intend to apply this to people with funky genders. to trans folks straddling lines. i think if someone is genderweird or got somethin funky goin on they aren't a straight up Man capital M with no qualifiers! do you see yourself as a man or not, deep down? (general you, not you anon!) i do apply it to trans men and cis men alike. i see no reason to separate the two as if trans men aren't really men. because there ARE binary trans men. there are binary cis men! there are a LOT of them out there in the world! some of them are even on tumblr! are there ALSO trans men that feel also kinda butch at the same time and like a little dykey? maybe. i dunno any personally so i'm not gonna make harsh calls and big rules and statements. i'd expect people to make their own judgement calls and use their discretion and best judgment! i absolutely do not want to push someone out who feels that it is their community and that they deserve to belong in it. this is why i don't patrol my followers list except for bots (common lately ugh tumblr!) and obvious gross lesbophobes (quite rare).

sorry this got so long. lmao i say i'm not gonna add anything and then next thing i know you have an essay!! sorry!! hope it makes sense. basically i fully agree with you and i'm sorry you are having people shame you and push you. they should not do that and i do not support it and it is not what i think We should be doing as a lesbian community.

#ask farmer lesbian #mod alfalfa #i can't speak for anyone but myself #idk what to tag this as #gender #nonbinary #please tell me if this makes sense or if i'm being confusing #i can ask my woife to summarize if necessary she is a woman of few words #anonymous #'i have nothing to add' *proceeds to write an essay* lmao

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mymelodyisme · 1 year

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If I understood it right you have sdv oc's? I'd love to know a few fun facts abt them🤗

Hiiiiii :) I apologize now for the length this post will take upon your screen.

I really only have Mys and the few people in her backstory 😭 (I can come up with some fun stuff for them now though :D)

Mys is mostly a self insert because I’ve gotten really into making her one but here’s a few fun facts about her!!

1. Before she moved into the valley she was actually way less colorful and looked a bit more classy and put together. Her boyfriend was a bit of a minimalist and snob and wasn’t a huge fan of bright colors. So she wore pale clothes, lots of skirts and dresses, her hair was usually long and tied up neatly, etc. I’d argue she also dyed her hair a few times to make it look more like a natural color (it’s naturally that pink/red shade). Three days before moving she bought a pair of overalls and had a wild time just adding a bunch of details to them, even if it wasn’t super well put together ☺️ (the space halo heart is my own logo btw lol)

2. Mys came into the farm life clueless, friendless, and lonely 100%. It’s why she’s so eager to befriend the townies and comes off a little strong. It’s also why she can’t say no and so quick to overexert herself if someone asks her for help 😭 if she knew that most people in town had no faith in her based off the way she looked and acted when she first arrived, she would likely cry. She’s probably a little too nice sometimes too 🥺 if you’re mean to her she’ll take it and cry alone later on.

3. She talks A LOT. When she gets to know you well enough she’ll just start talking about something she’s really into and go on for hours always finding something new to point out (poor Shane lol). I once said if she was a real character in the game one of her heart events would be her holding the farmer hostage as she explained the entire lore of her show after she invited them in to watch it with her. (I have done this myself so many times.) 😭 She’s also a bit of thoughtless speaker sometimes. Saying things a little too quickly before her brain processes it.

4. On her slow farm days she’ll stay inside and catch up on tv. She really likes trash tv drama and novellas. Adding to that, she’s a huge romantic. She swoons and sighs and hopes that someone would love her so strongly. Especially after what she went though with her ex 🥹 Other hobbies include: gaming, journaling (she picked this one up after she moved), taking as many photos as possible of everything, reading (comics, romance novels, and mysteries) daydreaming, and collecting things (stuffed animals mostly)

5. She loves a good lemonade and pizza! She doesn’t really drink (at least not until she met Shane 😭) and will go into the saloon to chat with Emily over lemonade. To win Shane’s friendship she started buying a pizza to share with him, and she’d sit patiently at a booth until he came in (on easy days.) she also goes around and says hi to everyone at least once. If she’s just having me-time, you can find her in a booth writing + doodling in her journal with a bunch of candy around her.

6. I just think this little fun fact is really cute but when she found out Shane loved peppers she planted some in her greenhouse so she’ll always have some to give or use for food. 🥺 (I have that in game 🤭 and she only gives him high quality ones)

7. She’s magic babey! ✨ the day before she moved her mom gave her a red brooch. After her grandpa passed away, he sent it to her mom with instructions to only give it to Mys when she decided to move to the valley. She only found out about it when the wizard pulled it towards him and suggested that someone in her family must have arcane experience.

😭😭 sorry that was so long. I’ll write like two facts about the others

The ex: dark brown hair, brown eyes, suits (lol idk)

1. Has no name yet 😩 Can he even count as a character?? Literally the worst boyfriend ever. He and Mys dated in high school up until he ghosted her a month before she moved. He been sleeping with her best friend, Celia, and then proceeded to elope with her. This man kept Mys around with jewelry, promises, and guilt.

2. He was an executive for Joja. Mys worked for the company because of him, and ultimately had to leave for that same reason. She found out about the elopement at the office, and had a long cry in the bathroom stalls. (Btw he totally gets his butt kicked by Shane at some point)

Celia: Blonde, thin, very pretty and model-like, wears a lot of tight clothes and has that one fake best friend voice

1. The “best friend,” the betrayer. She clung onto Mys because Mys was really easy to manipulate. 🥺 Wasn’t very nice to her at all but made her believe she loved her like a sister. When Mys met Haley it was like meeting a younger Celia. 🥹 I guess mys still missed her because she tried to be Haley’s friend despite how mean she was. Luckily, Haley actually becomes pretty nice and apologizes for her rude behavior.

2. She would absolutely be a modern day influencer. Perhaps she is (if phones exist in this interpretation 🤔 I like to think they do but pelican town can’t host then or something 😭)

Todd: 7ft tall, thin but definitely works out, looks like he has money and works with money, very serious and classy 😭

1. Mys’s Boyfriend year 3? She and Shane are already pretty established as smitten by the town but they’re both stuck at the fork in the road of to be or not to be. (At some point Mys finally makes her move only for him to reject her out of fear 😭). Anyways!! She was asked by mayor Lewis to take an important business trip into the city to meet with an investor who wanted to open the land for expansion and more agricultural work. He figured Mys, as the local farmer, would have better input. Shane was supposed to accompany her into the city but they got into a bit so she left alone (Shane realized he was being stupid and ran to catch the bus but jsut barely missed it, his missed opportunity at love 😭). The investor turned out to be a guy named Toddrick Theodore Tapps. He was quickly taken with her because she was just so lively of a person. He could not believe she was the local farmer. He decided to head back into the valley with her to visit the land and ended up staying in one of Mys’s spare rooms at the farmhouse. He didn’t help her on the farm at all, mostly just walked around took notes, and inspected the quality of everything.

2. He’s very jealous. He and Shane are constantly at each other’s throats. Mys told him all about her best friend Shane :) and he knew immediately that Mys was in love with him. 😭 he did NOT expect Shane to be so dingy tho which is funny. He mentioned that to his face too. (It doesn’t help that Todd TOWERS over the both of them and looks like he comes from old money.) He polices mys’s friendships a bit commenting how some of the townies are rather immature, some seem like terrible people, and in particular, that Shane is a bad influence on those around him. When she gets upset at his obvious disrespect he apologizes for saying things that hurt her feelings 😭 the man literally only puts up with Shane for her. I do think he is romantic though, and definitely what Mys imagined being romanced would be like. He’s pretty rich so he spoils her, and buys the town’s approval with generous donations.

3. He’s a bit of himself. He’s not a bad guy, but he does think he’s a quality man and he loves what he does. So when he asks Mys to move to the city with him where he’ll spoil her for the rest of her life he’s surprised that she actually wants to be a farmer dealing with dirt, grime, monsters, and all the things in between. This man genuinely tries to convince her to give up the farm, and even tries to make a compromise that the farm will still be up and running but they’ll hire people to tend to it. (He probably also suggested changing the name to something more serious). He and Mys get into a fight over it, and he tells her what time his bus to the city will be leaving. She wishes him well, and a happy life with a wife who shares his values, and doesn’t show up that day.

4. I like to imagine years down the line Mys and Shane are in the city doing some work and play when they run into him. Both parties find out that the other is engaged/married. And they make up. He still can’t believe Mys chose Shane tho 😭 “I thought you would choose him, but I’m still surprised. You seemed so smitten with him, but he didn’t look like he was ever going to make anything of that.”

#LOL I WROTE A LOT ANS THERES LIKELY MORE I CAN ADD #I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS 🥹♥️#i hope this is what you wanted too 🥺#I’m sorry again that there was so much #IM SORRYI CANT GIVE BETTER DESCRIPTIONS THEYRE JUST GHOSTS IN MY HEAD #🥺ty for asking btw I appreciate it!#♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️🥺🥺#Stardew Valley: Poochencia Farm #edit: crying it’s so long #long post #IM SO SORRY ABOUT THAT #Farmer mys #you said ‘give me a few fun facts’ and I wrote a whole essay

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genericpuff · 29 days

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i had a post in the works talking about some of my personal life shit and the things i'm looking to do with rekindled this year to help make personal life shit easier aaand then i fell asleep for a nap and when i woke up Rachel announced that LO was ending in less than 10 episodes ??

sooo yeah i'm officially saving that post for later, because LO is officially ending, with an actual end date. It does mean that it's not ending at the start of Spring like my initial prediction, which is a bummer (because that would have been really cool LMAOOO) but it does mean it gets to go on long enough to resolve the current plot arc. As for every other plotline in the story... yeah, those aren't getting wrapped up, at least not in any way that could be satisfying.

For over the last year LO has been a series of "wait seriously???" and this is yet another, though it's kind of different this time. We knew the end was coming and practically begging for Rachel to pick an end date because for many, following along with this comic has become a Sisyphean task week after week. It's bittersweet in a way, but . . . I also kinda don't feel anything? Maybe it's just my 'tism, maybe it's just the fact that I'm so tired of following this series, but I just... don't feel joy, but I don't feel dread. It's ending and that's that. As all things come and go in life, some day there won't be any more LO, and that day is May 11th.

I will miss the weekly readalongs that I would do with pals, the memes we'd make out of the new material, but I don't think I'm going to miss the comic and everything it said and did. At this point reading LO feels like watching a horse struggle to breathe and you're just begging the farmer to put it out of its misery, but the farmer thinks "No no, it'll be fine! It'll get back up in no time!" and it's like... no, it desperately needs to be put to rest 💀

I still have my two drafts stowed away, both on opposing sides of the fence depending on how LO turns out-

-and now we finally have an end date on when those essays will be written.

I don't know how I feel yet about it ending. These are complicated feelings to sort through regarding a comic that's basically been my life for the last few years, even before I turned into a critic of it. I'm just glad there's a light at the end of the tunnel. And I'm glad even my "love to hate it" energy has been waning on it the past few weeks anyways so that the end of it all can feel as painless as possible LOL Don't get me wrong, there will still be plenty to discuss after the comic, I don't think the antiLO/ULO community will just disappear into a puff of smoke as soon as LO is over, but I think a lot of us are also equally relieved that the comic made it this easy to stop reading and that it now has an end point.

And most of all, I'm hoping that whatever ending the comic brings, even if it just winds up being the S2 finale all over again for the critics, is still satisfying for the fans who have stuck around with it this long. The people who have loved this comic through it all at least deserve a proper send-off and I really hope Rachel gives it to them.

As for me... I'm not going anywhere, but it's been nice to stuff the overflowing clothes of LO back into its drawer within my brain. I want to make room for other drawers, other things, other pieces of work that will undoubtedly bring me more joy and entertainment. I don't know what yet, but it's nice to know the drawers aren't overflowing anymore.

And that's all I'm gonna say on that.

#lore olympus critical #anti lore olympus #lo critical

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gatheringbones · 6 months

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[“My girlfriend (I’ll call her Rachel) and I have been riding the same bus to the Metro station together nearly every weekday morning for the last two years. After a few weeks, all the commuters on the bus start to look familiar. You begin to notice who travels with whom. You start to give people secret nicknames (Franklin Planner Guy, Park Service Guy, Beautiful Woman, Vancouver Boy). Pretty soon you start noticing each other around town, start saying hi at the farmers’ market. You don’t know each other’s names, but if someone disappears from their regular bus for more than a few days, you begin to wonder if they’re okay, if they’ve moved or changed jobs. It’s an odd sort of community.

Rachel and I wondered sometimes if our fellow workers had nicknames for us, too. What would we call ourselves? Dress Alike Girls? We’ve committed the Ultimate Lesbian Sin—dressing alike—on more than one occasion. We have totally dissimilar clothing tastes, but an unfortunate affinity for the same colors, so we’ve been known to show up at each other’s houses in the morning to find one of us wearing tailored silk khakis, black pumps, and a dark blouse—that would be Rachel—and the other (that would be me) in khaki shorts, black sneakers, and a dark blue T-shirt. Embarrassing. We finally decided that our bus gang would call us Jointed at the Hip Girls. We’d sit at the back of the bus, hold hands sometimes, whisper. We didn’t need to wear T-shirts that said “Dyke.”

But we didn’t actually think about it very much either. We felt safe enough in our little bus world to be “straight acting” (ha ha).

And one morning, when we were standing on the platform at the Metro station, one of our bus buddies approached. She’s tall, light-skinned African-American woman with a penchant for outfits that Rachel admires, and we had wondered if she were family; she had that look about her. She apologized for interrupting and said, I just wanted to tell you guys that it’s so nice to see you in the mornings. I looked at Rachel, a little puzzled. I mean, the woman continued, You both just look really happy when you’re together, you sort of glow.

I started to blush. My ears got very, very hot.

Umm, I umm, I said.

Rachel was more composed (although she was blushing too). She thanked the woman graciously, and asked her name. Kara, she told us. I actually ran into Kara the other day at the grocery store, and we rode the bus home together. I found out that she’s a poet and a sculptor, and she lives three blocks from me. I told her I was writing about her in an essay I was doing for an anthology. She laughed and said, Oh, because of that thing I did that morning?, and chatted for a few more minutes. I don’t remember the rest of that conversation either, really. After all this time, is it possible that I’m still traumatized at the thought of coming out?”]

kanani kauka, from freedom rings, from a woman like that: lesbian and bisexual writers tell their coming out stories, 2000

#kanani kauka #lesbian literature #currently reading

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mostlysignssomeportents · 1 year

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When you hear "fintech," think "unlicensed bank"

Tomorrow (May 2) I’ll be in Portland at the Cedar Hills Powell’s with Andy Baio for my new novel, Red Team Blues.

In theory, patents are for novel, useful inventions that aren’t obvious “to a skilled practitioner of the art.” But as computers ate our society, grifters began to receive patents for “doing something we’ve done for centuries…with a computer.” “With a computer”: those three words had the power to cloud patent examiners’ minds.

If you’d like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here’s a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/05/01/usury/#tech-exceptionalism

Patent trolls — who secure “with a computer” patents and then extract ransoms from people doing normal things on threat of a lawsuit — are an underappreciated form of “tech exceptionalism.” Normally, “tech exceptionalism” refers to bros who wave away things like privacy invasions by arguing that “with a computer” makes it all different.

These tech exceptionalists are the legit face of tech exceptionalism, the Forbes 30 Under 30 set. They’re grifters, but they’re celebrated grifters. There’s a whole bottom-feeding sludge of tech exceptionalists that don’t get the same kind of attention, like patent trolls.

Oh, and the fintech industry.

As Riley Quinn says, “when you hear ‘fintech,’ think: ‘unlicensed bank.’” The majority of fintech “innovation” consists of adding “with a computer” to highly regulated activities and declaring them to be unregulated (and, in the case of crypto, unregulatable).

There are a lot of heavily regulated financial activities, like dealing in securities (something the crypto industry is definitely doing and claims it isn’t). Most people don’t buy or sell securities regularly — indeed, most Americans own little or no stocks.

But you know what regulated financial activity a lot of Americans participate in?

Going into debt.

As wages stagnate and the price of housing, medical care, childcare, transportation and education soar, Americans fund their consumption with debt. Trillions of dollars’ worth of debt. Many of us are privileged to borrow money by walking into a bank and asking for a loan, but millions of Americans are denied that genteel experience.

Instead, working Americans increasingly rely on payday lenders and other usurers who charge sky-high interest rates, on top of penalties and fees, trapping borrowers in an endless cycle of indebtedness. This is an historical sign of a civilization in decline: productive workers require loans to engage in useful activities. Normally, the activity pans out — the crop comes in, say — and the debt is repaid.

But eventually, you’ll get a bad beat. The crop fails, the workshop burns down, a pandemic shuts down production. Instead of paying off your debt, you have to roll it over. Now, you’re in an even worse situation, and the next time you catch a bad break, you go further into debt. Over time, all production comes under the control of creditors.

The historical answer to this is jubilee: a regular wiping-away of all debt. While this was often dressed up in moral language, there was an absolutely practical rationale for it. Without jubilee, eventually, all the farmers stop growing food so that they can grow ornamental flowers for their creditors’ tables. Then, as starvation sets in, civilization collapses:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/07/08/jubilant/#construire-des-passerelles

As the debt historian Michael Hudson says, “Debts that can’t be paid, won’t be paid.” Without jubilee, indebtedness becomes a chronic and inescapable condition. As more and more creditors attach their claims to debtors’ assets, they have to compete with one another to terrorize the debtor into paying them off, first. One creditor might threaten to garnish your paycheck. Another, to repossess your car. Another, to evict you from your home. Another, to break your arm. Debts that can’t be paid, won’t be paid — but when you have a choice between a broken arm and stealing from your kid’s college fund or the cash-register, maybe the debt can be paid…a little. Of course, digital tools offer all kinds of exciting new tools for arm-breakers — immobilizing your car, say, or deleting the apps on your phone, starting with the ones you use most often:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/04/02/innovation-unlocks-markets/#digital-arm-breakers

Under Trump, payday lenders romped through America. A lobbyist for the payday lenders became a top Trump lawyer:

https://theintercept.com/2017/11/27/white-house-memo-justifying-cfpb-takeover-was-written-by-payday-lender-attorney/

This lobbyist then oversaw Trump’s appointment of a Consumer Finance Protection Bureau boss who deregulated payday lenders, opening the door to triple digit interest rates:

https://www.latimes.com/business/lazarus/la-fi-lazarus-cfpb-payday-lenders-20180119-story.html

To justify this, the payday loan industry found corruptible academics and paid them to write papers defending payday loans as “inclusive.” These papers were secretly co-authored by payday loan industry lobbyists:

https://www.washingtonpost.com/business/2019/02/25/how-payday-lending-industry-insider-tilted-academic-research-its-favor/

Of course, Trump doesn’t read academic papers, so the payday lenders also moved their annual conference to a Trump resort, writing the President a check for $1m:

https://www.propublica.org/article/trump-inc-podcast-payday-lenders-spent-1-million-at-a-trump-resort-and-cashed-in

Biden plugged many of the cracks that Trump created in the firewalls that guard against predatory lenders. Most significantly, he moved Rohit Chopra from the FTC to the CFPB, where, as director, he has overseen a determined effort to rein in the sector. As the CFPB re-establishes regulation, the fintech industry has moved in to add “with a computer” to many regulated activities and so declare them beyond regulation.

One fintech “innovation” is the creation of a “direct to consumer Earned Wage Access” product. Earned Wage Access is just a fancy term for a program some employers offer whereby workers can get paid ahead of payday for the hours they’ve already worked. The direct-to-consumer EWA offers loans without verifying that the borrower has money coming in. Companies like Earnin claim that their faux EWA services are free, but in practice, everyone who uses the service pays for the “Lightning Speed” upsell.

Of course they do. Earnin charges sky-high interest rates and twists borrowers’ arms into leaving a “tip” for the service (yes, they expect you to tip your loan-shark!). Anyone desperate enough to pay triple-digit interest rates and tip the service for originating their loan is desperate and needs to the money now:

https://prospect.org/power/05-01-2023-fintech-ewa-payday-loan-scam/

EWA annual interest rates sit around 300%. The average EWA borrower uses the service two or three times every month. EWA CEOs and lobbyists claim that they’re banking the unbanked — but the reality is that they’re acting as sticky-fingered brokers between banks and young, poor workers, marking up traditional bank services.

This fact is rarely mentioned when EWA companies lobby state legislatures seeking to be exempted from usury rules that are supposed to curb predatory lenders. In Vermont, Earnin wants an exemption from the state’s 18% interest rate cap — remember, the true APR for EWA loans is about 300%.

In Texas, payday lenders are classed as loan brokers, not loan originators and are thus able to avoid the state’s usury caps. EWAs are lobbying the Texas legislature for further exemptions from state money-transmitter and usury limit laws, principally on the strength of the “it’s different: we do it with a computer” logic.

But as Jarod Facundo writes for The American Prospect, quoting Monica Burks from the Center for Responsible Lending, a loan is a loan even if it’s with a computer: “The industry is trying to create a new definition for what a loan is in order to exempt themselves from existing consumer protection laws… When you offer someone a portion of money on the promise that they will repay it, and often that repayment will be accompanied with fees or charges or interest, that’s what a loan is.”

Catch me on tour with Red Team Blues in Mountain View, Berkeley, Portland, Vancouver, Calgary, Toronto, DC, Gaithersburg, Oxford, Hay, Manchester, Nottingham, London, and Berlin!

[Image ID: A stately, columnated bank building, bedecked in garish payday lender signs.]

Image: Andre Carrotflower (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:30_North_%28former_Pontiac_Commercial_%26_Savings_Bank_Building%29,_Pontiac,_Michigan_-_entrance_and_Chief_Pontiac_relief_sculpture_-_20201213.jpg

CC BY-SA 4.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/deed.en

#pluralistic #cfpb #earned wage access #digital armbreakers #loansharks #payday lenders #tech exceptionalism #jubilee #debt #fintech #usury #michael hudson #graeber #debts that can't be paid wont be paid

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frownyalfred · 4 months

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So like both Bruce & Clark are only children but with very different only child experiences bc of how they grew up.

Clark grew up on a farm surrounded by his loving parents and (probably) an interlocked community of farmers and families so he sees sharing as caring and helping out as his duty, even without the superpowers. He is the last of his kind but was saved from the narrative by the Kent farm.

Bruce grew up in a stone manor with someone tending to his every call and with almost nothing he can't have. Sharing was forced upon him with the arrival of many batkids to the manor. He was never meant to be alone but was doomed by the narrative in the beginning.

But in the end, I think that "Only Child" streak always comes out from them in the form of "Do Not Touch" & "Mine" About each other.

In this essay I will...

I can't imagine what it must have been like for them to slowly get to know and trust each other, only to realize how many similarities they have between them. Different flavors of the same things, etc.

Because of their families, their jobs, their personas, they can't be that way with anyone else. But with each other? They can be a little selfish. They can be only sons again, if just for a moment.

#asks #bruce wayne #batman #dc #clark kent #superbat #superman #dc comics #thoughts

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brostateexam · 20 days

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Have not been saying much for a while because everything is hard.

I. My BiL has had c diff three times now and after the third time the oncologist decided to take a damn the torpedoes approach because they were wasting weeks that should have been devoted to chemo because he was too sick and too weak to withstand outpatient treatment. I haven't seen him irl since December but my mom says he looks rough and if his immune system is so messed up that he keeps getting c diff idk that I really want to visit him. What if I get him sick?

All of this is background to me, though, because mostly I'm invested in my sister. She wants to divorce him. He needs to be better enough that she won't face ostracization for doing so. I am invested in him getting better enough for that to proceed for her sake.

II. Something about my relationship with my mom has been bothering me and I finally figured out what it is: everything is equally important to her. She doesn't prioritize anything. If I am having a tough time and ask for help she'll say "well I'm busy every day this week but I can come over next week in Thursday for ninety minutes" and then when she comes over I ask her what she was up to, both to make conversation and because I'm nosy, and it's like... she volunteered for a clothing drive at the synagogue. She went grocery shopping. She went to a farmer's market. Thanks for fitting me into your schedule, I guess! Glad to know I am on the same level as farm fresh tomatoes.

III. I have been having a really tough time of it for the last few months. The vacation in Mexico was... Not restful. Shane had a seizure on the plane and I spent the first two days managing logistics related to that (and navigating the extra ~$2k I spent covering his medical costs while on the trip). His back is still fucked up almost two months later and so I get to do extra housework and chores because he can't lift or bend without being in pain.

IV. Resultant to III, I had a really awful period of about a month with an online friend who started being super short and terse with me because I've been around online less. It was really clear he felt like I was ditching him to go hang out with my cool friends or something, instead of the reality of the situation: I'm cleaning litter boxes and doing yard work and changing the sheets on the bed aka #livingthedream. I told him about all the stuff that was going on but it was clear he didn't believe me or resented my absence nevertheless. This came to a head with me basically texting him an essay about why he was being a bad friend. In a turn of good news, he listened, and apologized, and we mended fences. That was nice because I just don't know how much more bad news I can take right now.

V. I've been struggling with work but really it's just. My boss. My coworkers like me. My project sponsors like me. My skip level likes me. My exec likes me. It's just him. We don't have a good relationship and I don't know how to fix it. I don't know that it is fixable. This is a problem because this is the guy I need in my corner to advance my career and I don't know that he'll do that for me. The alternative is leaving my company, which sounds attractive on paper but in practice the job market is so so bad and it's just so discouraging. The idea of a new job sounds incredible. I wish I could do that. Maybe even a career change.

VI. Unfortunately, that's not gonna happen because of financial pressures. NGL, as much as I like my house (and I do -- I love its little windows, I love my pink dining nook and green bedroom, I love the mature fruit trees and pretty backyard full of wildflowers), I wish i had the cash in hand, instead. I feel trapped here, and like I'm making the most of it. That's a shit feeling to have.

VII. I've started regaining weight. Not a lot. Fifteen pounds since October. But it's scaring me. It's making me wonder if this whole surgery thing was pointless because I can't seem to stop myself from wanting to eat myself to death. So I'm trying to beat it back without resorting to "diet culture behaviors" (read: disordered eating) and that's tough.

There could be a separate post for things that are going well perhaps, but this is what's going not so well and it feels like a lot. Sometimes it feels like too much.

#*eating disorder #*cancer #*money

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doublel27 · 3 months

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Alright, @paperstorm and @liminalmemories21 , based on this post, and your very sweet anon who asked what Carlos thought about TK getting snuggly with his dad:

Carlos is a man who wouldn’t imagine an adult relationship with his father with that much physical contact or intimacy and seeing this very attractive man who has an amazing relationship with his father probably was really, really appealing to Carlos.

We know, now, after four seasons, that Carlos desperately wanted a better relationship with his father than the one he had. When Carlos meets the Strands in 1.01, he finds a father and son team who work together who came down from New York, together, to join the 126. And the idea for Carlos that you could have an active working relationship with your father where the two of you were on the same team and there was as much respect as TK clearly had for his father when Carlos deeply believes his father never wanted him to be in law enforcement because he’s too soft. Carlos Reyes cannot imagine a world in which he is allowed to work with his father and be so unabashedly proud of him.

And then, LATER, at the bar, when Carlos is looking at this man who is actually too attractive to be real, he watches as TK snuggles in and leans on his father, and I agree with @paperstorm that part of this is about touch and that TK is snuggly and this is a good sign. BUT ALSO, that a grown man would cuddle his father in public and his father would ALLOW it. WILD. INCONCEIVABLE. And so very attractive to a man who I think WANTS that.

Which leads me to the part of my essay in which we get to how this leads to 2.04. It’s no secret, I adore 2.04. The lead up from 2.02 when TK is like “you spend so much time around my crazy family, when do I get to meet yours” and Carlos being like “refill?” and then the issue got forced at the farmers market. In the fight that ensues after the farmer’s market, the thing that Carlos says when he explodes is about how not everybody grows up with parents that threw the closet door off the hinges. Because Carlos is deeply envious of TK whose parents didn’t go silent when he came out and then pretended it didn’t happen. He’s envious of a TK who if he had tried to marry a woman a year later would have been like “Ummm….what the actual fuck, TK?” and made him sit and talk about it. (Do I still hate this storyline, yes? But it fits the narrative in this way) and like…not only did you, TK, come out and be accepted and encouraged, but it didn’t put a chasm between you and your parents of what they thought a man should be and what you were.

Like Owen Strand accepts and encourages the man that TK is. He accepts that TK is a gay man who is incredibly physically affectionate with anyone he loves and that’s okay. They still have a physical relationship and it’s not a problem and it’s actually something that is encouraged, meanwhile Carlos hasn’t said an honest thing to his father about who he really is and what he wants outside of showing his father he’s a good cop and a good man. And like, they’re not-not physically affectionate, Gabriel is a hugger, but the hug in 2.08 where Carlos is clearly craving more because his father whispers in his ear about the right kind of instincts still hurts every time, and the way he’s so pleasantly surprised with the hug from his dad in 4.08 after he asks Gabriel to be his best man and they hug for even a little longer and it’s just so happy that it’s relieved almost and that required a lot of work on Carlos and Gabriel’s parts to get there.

And so yeah, I think if we think about who Carlos says he was, and who we knew him to be in season 1, this man who was very clearly locked up in his own sense of who he should be versus who he is at his core, and what he craves. The narrative throughout season 4, that Carlos brings up, is that TK was the key that unlocked a lot of the parts of himself he didn’t accept and wanted to fix. And I think he saw this grown man who is gay and his age having the kind of relationship he wanted with his father and that man’s father not only accepted it but openly encouraged it and wasn’t embarrassed…I think it meant the world to Carlos.

I think he saw TK and not only wanted him but wanted to believe that the life TK had was possible for himself, and he wanted to get there. And damn it he did.

Which I think made it even harder for Carlos, in seasons 1 and 2, who was working to get rid of the idea that the queer parts of him and the parts of him that didn’t live up to the machismo of his community were broken and in need of fixing, to introduce this very unabashedly unashamed person to his parents. In 2.04, Carlos talks a lot about not wanting to shove his gayness in his parents’ faces, because in some ways the concept that being gay is something in him that needed fixing comes from his family and their lack of conversations in the years before TK.

To introduce TK to his family is the chance to have them confirm that they do feel that way, to reject Carlos and TK, to a man who strives for perfection and doing the right thing…terrifying. Not only for Carlos, but for someone to come and wound TK like that. So he avoided it, until he ran right into it…and then was mad because TK gets from Gwyn and Owen something Carlos wants desperately, and TK has always had it. And then to think of Carlos afraid of his parent’s reaction to TK when Gwyn and Owen just like love Carlos unconditionally…yeah…yeah, I think he was into it and envious from the start.

Which makes me want to go rewatch scenes between Carlos and Gabriel for their physicality for more research. Damn it, haven’t wanted to do that in awhile. Also, if the show would kindly retcon the murder of Gabriel Reyes and I can have a redo of the finale with Gabriel as Carlos’s best man (even though I hate that trope and want Carlos to have friends) as the start of season 5 I may start to forgive them.

(Please go watch With, Love to be filled with joy and rage about what we could have had as Benito is at his other gay son’s wedding…)

#911 lone star #tarlos #carlos reyes #carlos reyes meta #tk strand #owen strand #gabriel reyes #tarlos meta

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stemmmm · 2 months

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Stem's Thoughts on Harvest Moon 64

(that other title's too long so i'm cutting it down now)

Harvest Moon 64 opens on a scene of your character walking around the street, speaking to everyone in the village who’s come to the event. You quickly piece together that this event in question is actually your grandfather’s funeral, the same grandfather who’s farm you’re about to take over. This little scene beautifully sets up both the tone of the game, and immediately shows the player that this iteration is far more focused on the story and characters. HM64 tells a story about the lives of many people in a small, dying town. It is a story about life, and it is a story about death.

A short disclaimer before we dig in: I played this game before the idea to write these essays cropped up, and have not replayed it since then, so this will be mostly vibes. I will try to do my research to make sure I’m not straight up lying though. (Also all of the images in this one are from google because I don't have a means of getting images from my N64 other than photographing the tv screen and I'm not doing that.)

What’s new!

HM64, also called Harvest Moon 2 by HMGB2 and nothing else I’ve ever seen, is the direct sequel to HM SNES. It’s not a sequel in the usual way sequels are, where you’re continuing where you left off with the same character, but in that every main character is the descendant of their equivalent in the previous game. It’s not important to the story, in fact if you don’t already know this, you probably wouldn’t notice anything past some similarities. I played this game before I tried out SNES and it still took me a minute, plus having it directly pointed out to me to get it. Maybe I’m oblivious, who knows.

Gameplay-wise, this iteration is home of a few series firsts: For one, your house can be upgraded to have a kitchen! You can't cook though, only collect recipes. You can also get a greenhouse where you can grow crops year-round. Sheep are introduced as barn animals that produce wool. You receive a fishing rod you can use whenever you want, but as far as I understand, the timing is nigh impossible unless you’re playing on a CRT (I am not, and never managed to catch a single fish). There’s a mine you can access in winter for something to do while you can’t grow crops (there are fall crops, but not winter) where you can find about two key items and garbage otherwise. Tool upgrades are no longer done by magic, but by leveling them up through use! Which I think is very neat and feels very natural, like you’ve just become more proficient with them as a farmer through practice. Characters can now come to visit you on the farm at random times, for either special story events or just to say hi! Your farmer can get sick from working too hard in bad weather, just like your animals, and there’s now medicine for that, just like your animals. And there’s inventory menus that I'll discuss at better length later.

What’s the same is… Most things in a basic sense. You’re on a farm with a dog, planting crops, raising livestock. You can make friends with folks in town by talking to them and giving them gifts. The livestock mechanics, as far as I could see and as far as I’ve been able to understand from online forums, are exactly the same as they were in SNES, the exception being there’s no wild beasts that can kill your animals but they’ll still get sick if they aren’t fenced overnight– and they’re not going to eat any grass unless they’re out overnight anyways.

As for your farm, you’re set up with the usual: a small house, a barn, coop, and fodder silo, a wood bin to store debris cleared off your farm, and a big messy field that you have to clean up before you can properly use it. It starts with three new additions though; a doghouse, a bowl that you can feed your dog with by putting edible items in there, and a mailbox that you’ll occasionally receive letters and notices in! They’re small additions, but very, very charming. The one thing that’s been removed is the toolshed, now replaced by a tiny toolbox by your house.

The world outside your farm is like an enhanced version of the SNES map. Imagine the town and forest now have one or two extra sections tacked onto them, one in the town for some extra housing, and a couple in the forest to let you explore the mountain more and get you deeper into the woods. The mountain still has a cave in it (this time with Harvest Sprites, who have been removed from your farm) and a summit you can climb to for certain events, but it has been upgraded with little wild animals that wander around and can be picked up and shown to people for a few friendship points, if they like the animal. (This applies to your dog too, there’s a well known exploit to max out Karen’s friendship in one day by repeatedly showing it to her in the bar where time is stopped.) The crossroads zone is also expanded by having three new areas you can travel to– the ranch that you buy animals at, a vineyard that’s more of a story-area, and a beach that mostly comes into play for a couple of summer festivals!

On the visual side, this game is the series’ first venture into the new frontier of 3d graphics… kind of. The artstyle is made of isometric 3D models that are rendered into flat sprites and then projected onto the TV as if that’s not what’s happening. The game even lets you turn your farm around in 3D to face different directions, but it’s locked to only let you play in specific angles. Changing the direction made me forget where everything was and get lost on my own tiny farm, so I never touched that mechanic.

Due to the dramatic artstyle shift– not only being in 3D but also presented at a 45 degree angle, the game becomes a fair bit harder to play than either of its 2D predecessors. The controls are just a little clunky, and the bizarre shape of the N64 controller really doesn’t help. This makes the tedium of farming a little irritating to do, since it requires pretty precise inputs done over and over for every extra thing you’re trying to grow. Fortunately, you're not on the hook to ship everything before 5PM comes around like in SNES, so you get to move a little bit slower. The fickle farming experience also gets a little help from the new inventory menu that can be accessed anywhere and any time. It has multiple inventory slots for both tools and items, each type having a dedicated section so there’s no need to prioritize carrying tools versus turnips. Unfortunately, this actually ends up being a little more cumbersome than useful, as the menu takes a little longer than is comfortable to open and is pretty clunky to use. I mostly avoided it unless I was bringing gifts to people. But the addition of an inventory opens up the opportunity for something else which defines this entire game...

Key items– a set of unique, unsellable items –are most frequently found in random, secret places around the farm and town, and they give you a reason to scour every inch of the place. They can also be given to you by NPCs when you gain relationships with them, which is convenient because their entire purpose is to help you get even better relationships with each of them, and maybe even unlock little stories with characters. For example, there’s a music box you can dig up in your field that can be given to any of the girls for a decently sized relationship bump. There’s also an old weathervane in the shape of a chicken that you can find in the little mine. If you give it to Rick, he’ll tell you that it was a precious thing that belonged to his grandmother as a cute scene to deepen the town’s lore and connect it to the first game. Key items quickly become the most important and sought after things in the game because they act as a vessel to deliver that which the game is all about: stories.

Lots of people in a little town

The narrative premise is exceedingly simple: you need to fix up your grandfather’s ruined farm and make a new life for yourself in this town within a certain amount of time, just like its predecessors. Except, this game is a lot bigger than either of them, and it didn’t fill all the extra space with new things to grow on your farm. In my entry on the SNES game, I mentioned that the introspective style of writing turned the repetitive farming gameplay into something more like meditation on things going on in the town. This game takes that idea and runs with it! The town in this game may only be slightly bigger than it was before, but it has a lot more people in it, and every single one of them has a lot more to say, more to do, more festivals to go to, and more story events to take part in. There's even a new photo album that fills in with images for reaching special events or succeeding at certain festivals! Your given goal may be to successfully revitalize your farm, but that rapidly stops being the reason why you want to play. Farming is only a means to further the narrative of the town.

Story events are no longer a reward for reaching the highest heart level with a girl, but instead something that happens naturally in the world as you make better friends with people, or if you just happen to be in the right place at the right time. The world doesn’t only consist of you living it and things happening to you. Instead, you end up being a fly on the wall to other people’s conversations and life events, and you get to see how those events change the people around you. People will begin to say different things, go different places, live different lives without your input at all– often much better lives, as everyone in the town is pretty deeply troubled, whether they seem like it or not.

There’s an added depth, too. While the characters in this series have always been defined by their conflicts (in the first game, every big cutscene with each girl was exclusively about their major life conflicts), this game takes it further in multiple ways. Characters have conflicts with their families: you as the player have a conflict with your parents who can take you home if you fail to farm well, Lillia and Basil have conflict over their marriage and the fact that Basil leaves for half the year, and Karen’s family situation is…. A lot. Then, there are characters at conflict with things much more nebulous, like the Mayor who tells you that the town is going to die out but he can’t find any way to save it, or like the young boy Kent who wants to be a farmer just like you, but through a series of events is forced to learn that life isn’t so simple, people can’t just do whatever they would like, and it takes very hard work to get to do the things you dream of. And then there are conflicts that aren’t even necessarily conflicts unless they run into your long-term plans.

Instead of only having a bunch of girls in town who exist only as your prospective marriage candidates, there are also five boys in the town who will marry those girls instead of you, if given the chance. Like in SNES, there are 5 levels of hearts that the girls can have for you. Unlike SNES, each one of these hearts has a corresponding event you can have with the girl where there’s a chance of her liking you more afterwards, if you say the right things. In addition to that though, there are just as many events coming from the other side of the story, rival events that trigger if you happen to be good friends with the boys.

My favorite story by far is that of Harris the mailman who falls in love with the librarian, Maria, from just seeing her handwriting on the outside of all the letters that she would write. I frequently saw him in the bar at the end of the day and he would tell me the woes of his love, saying that he just needed to work up the courage to finally speak to her. Then one day, I happened to be outside of the library when he and Maria met face to face and she handed over a letter addressed to him. No longer did he sit in the bar forlorn every night, instead all he would do was excitedly tell me about Maria, and then when I visited the library, Maria would tell me about Harris!

While I’m on the subject of these characters, I think it’s worth going in a little more depth on who these people are past the grandchildren of the characters from the last game. See, you may be familiar with names like Karen and Kai and Gray, etc., etc. from a little recently remade game called Story of Seasons: Friends of Mineral Town, which is a modern version of Friends of Mineral Town on the GameBoy Advance, which is a port of Back to Nature on the PlayStation. These are not those characters. At all. While the basic elements of these characters are intact– Popuri is cute and childish, Ann is a workaholic, Maria is shy and a little oblivious –nothing else is the same. They all work different jobs and marry different people than they are paired with in later entries, and in my humble opinion, it all works WAY better in this game, probably because of the fact that these characters were designed for this specific context!

As an example, Popuri’s exasperated mother, Lillia, runs the flower shop and Popuri was named by her father, Basil, who loves plants. She’s childish and sweet and loves flowers, but can also be a complete brat. She eventually marries Gray, Ann’s brother, who lives on the ranch run by his father, Doug, who struggles to understand his children. Gray is an angry young man who seems to have a particular dislike for you, but you don’t learn why until you discover he was a promising young jockey until he got a bad injury and had to give up the sport.

Am I gushing a bit and letting the game design part fall to the wayside? Sure probably, but I can only gush because the game does a brilliant job of making a cast of characters who, while simple on their own, have interconnected lives that come together to give every one of them so much more depth than they would have otherwise. It all builds a narrative, and while narrative design is definitely something different than game design on its own, this game is far more about the narrative so it’s impossible to not focus on.

The problems

The trouble with these events is that I nearly missed the chance to see that letter be exchanged. You have some control over the progression of the events, because you have to be decent friends with the boys in order for them to trigger at all, but unlike the girls who have a handy visual signal of how much they like you, the boys have no such thing, so you can’t really know if a new event is ready to fire off. There’s no way of knowing where or when they’ll happen either unless you look it up, and even then you have to get lucky because sometimes they just don’t trigger when you want them to. I had a lovely moment in my game where I managed to accidentally catch a cold from working too hard in the snow and lost a day to being bedridden, followed by the New Years celebration which takes a day away from you, then followed by Kai and Karen’s wedding– something that I had missed multiple events for and therefore had no idea was coming, which also took a day from me. After that three day chain of no work, I think I was extremely lucky my animals didn’t get sick and die.

This chain of events led directly to me never speaking to Gray again, even though he was the boy I was most interested in, because I wanted to marry Popuri and there was too much risk of him getting to her before I could. The reason why I didn’t go into more detail about the relationship between those two when I was talking about them earlier is because I straight up don’t know it, I couldn’t risk giving them a chance to get together.

The thing is, even if I hadn’t forced Gray and Popuri’s cutscenes to stop, I still wouldn’t actually know what their relationship is like, because I have not beaten this game. I know what the ending entails and I can reasonably expect I probably would not have gotten an excellent one, but I’m sure it still would have been fine. I stopped playing the game entirely before I even managed to get married. Why? Because I couldn’t get any of Popuri’s heart events to trigger. I had her hearts maxed out and had a blue feather ready to go in my pocket, so I could turn on the game and marry her right away anytime I wanted to. But I wanted to trigger the little events, even if they’re just a couple seconds of some pixels talking to me on a screen. They’re cute. And it made me sad that I couldn’t see them for some imperceptible reason. So I stopped playing and didn’t pick the game back up.

I don’t remember how close I was to the end of the game, I know I was at least in year 2, but I don’t even remember how much longer the game is after that. Probably a good amount. I had definitely gotten most of the events you could get at this point, since multiple other characters had gotten married, and the farming wasn’t something I really enjoyed so I can’t say I wasn’t at least a little bored by this point, but I wasn’t frustrated with the general mechanics of the game. The days were long enough, but not too long, that I had just enough time to go anywhere I wanted and do what I needed before night came. I could still talk to characters and go to festivals and play minigames. But I didn’t want to, because the game wasn’t doing what it seemed like it was supposed to for some arbitrary reason and that frustrated me enough to make me stop. When the fun of a game is found more in experiencing special events rather than anything else, the player feels cheated out of their good time when those events are too hard to find or can be missed outright, and that’s exactly what I experienced.

Parting Thoughts

The ending, according to what I've read, is very similar to the SNES endings, in that you’ll get different results based on all of the different things you’ve done. Whether you’re married, how many crops you shipped, how many animals you have, how well liked you are by the town… I imagine it’s not quite the victory lap that SNES’s ending was with its little cutscenes, since apparently all you get are comments on how well you performed by various people in the town, but it still seems nice and rewarding! At least like more of a reward than whatever the hell GB1 was trying to do. It seems like a perfectly good ending that it would be nice to see myself someday.

Despite all my troubles with this game, I believe HM64 is still the best one out there– at least that I’ve played yet. The events are plentiful and the content is meaty. The repetitive day to day dialogue still has the simple breath of life that SNES did, that manages to make the most out of a small amount. Don’t get me wrong, this game came out in 1999, I’m giving it a lot of praise but the characters still repeat the same line to you every day, and they still freeze in place until you leave the room. It’s revolutionary, but this is comparing it to a game on the literal Super Nintendo. Absolutely pick up this game to try it out, but keep those expectations tempered. That said, I never picked up this game nor knew a thing about it until I was well into my 20’s, but the moment I started playing, it hit me with a wave of nostalgia as if I’d known this game my whole life. At least to me, the look and feel of the game were like coming home to a childhood I never had.

Will I pick up this game again with the intent to beat it? Maybe! Hard to say for sure when I’m trying to play decades worth of games and write about them at a comprehensive level. What I do know is that this is exactly what I want more farming games to be. It’s a game that has thoughts about life, and about death, both good and bad. And I think this is the perfect context to share those thoughts.

#hm posting #harvest moon #story of seasons #harvest moon 64 #hm64 #m.txt

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lipstickchainsaw · 5 months

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Oh, for the stp questions, what do you think of the thorn? She is my favourite 🫶🫶

I think the Witch > Thorn route is probably my favourite, and most thematically coherent/meaty? Some Chapter 3 Princesses' are just their Chapter 2 version but More (like the Eye of the Needle, arguably the Den), but the Thorn really does stand out as a more fleshed out narrative, with more depth.

To get into the route, you have to either cheat the first choice (first going down without the Pristine Blade to lock the Princess into her more 'harmless' version before going back up grab the Blade and slay her), or take the first opportunity to stab her once her back is turned (yes, the Narrator is pushing you to do it, or you've locked yourself out of resisting because you already played the Damsel, but from her perspective, that doesn't make a difference). To build on what I said in my essay on the Pristine Blade, the simple fact that you have access to the Blade influences the dynamic between you and the Princess (corrupts it, really).

In either case, you really do betray her trust, and this hurts her considerably more than the arm torn/cut off, or whatever cuts you leave on her otherwise, because the violence she can immediately repay with her own. It's the hurt, the knowledge that she trusted you with her vulnerability and you took advantage of it, that she can't resolve, and this is, naturally, what the next chapter is about.

I'm not wholly sure why she's called the Witch, because she does surprisingly few things we might associate with witches.

Regardless, going in, you're joined by the Voice of the Opportunist, whose entire shtick is looking for ways to eke out short-term advantages without a care for any long-term concerns. In short, this fucker will defect in the prisoner dilemma after telling you he's going to cooperate, honest, and then be surprised you don't trust him in the second iteration, because he's on your side this time, he promises!

And this is how the Witch sees you, the Protagonist, because that's what these voices represent, and she sees her only defense against your backstabbing ways is to... be that exact same thing. To also keep her cards close to her chest, and jump at whatever first opportunity she gets to get one over on you (this is what she does if you turn your back on her in this route, even at the cost of her own life, the Scorpion and Frog/Farmer and Viper parallels are explicitly mentioned in the achievement). She's been hurt, and the only way she can avoid being hurt again, is to hurt you first.

The main difference between you and her, of course, is that you have the Blade, the power in this situation (yes, she did kill you last time, but that's hardly what matters here), and acknowledging this is the key to getting to the Thorn.

Because you have to give it up! You have to give the Blade to her, by way of apology, putting your trust in someone you know has no reason to like you and every reason to hurt you, and you have to put yourself at her mercy. Let her use that power against you like you did against her.

And the Witch doesn't understand why you do it! Why would you give up the upper hand when you have it? She wouldn't, after all. So she's suspicious, and she doesn't know what you're doing, but she remembers the hurt, and whatever game you're playing, she can now hurt you before you hurt her, so she takes the opportunity to kill you and immediately proves that hurting you doesn't stop her from being hurt either.

She asks you why you let her do that to her, because hurting you didn't resolve the dissonance between what she thought you were like and what you actually did. Hurting you doesn't suddenly bring your plan into clarity, and it leaves her incredibly confused.

But I think she asks herself another question, quietly, without quite being willing to acknowledge it to herself:

'Why would I do that?'

And this finally brings us to the Thorn (sorry for taking so long to actually get to her, anon, but I can't help myself). Some time has passed between the end of the Witch and now, and she had been plagued with those questions, with thinking of who she is, what she wants to be, and how to deal with the hurt while she tries really hard to figure out if she can actually trust you or not.

This is why the first question she asks you is if you're there to laugh at her. She thinks she might have seen your play (and she can be correct if you do decide to laugh at her! The achievement being called 'Past Life Gambit' is very fitting. You get a ton of opportunities to be cruel to her here and validate her distrust!), and when you say you're not, she's just... lost.

The thorns around are neat, because the degree to which this betrayal has hurt her also causes her to hurt herself. The thorns are pointed inward. You can get in, but you can't get out, and neither can she! This distrust within her is literally digging into her own skin, and even though she has the Blade, has the power in this situation, she cannot use it to resolve this situation for herself. She's going to need you, but if she gives you that power, how can she possibly know you're not just going to hurt her again? How does she know you're not going to make the same decision she did? How can she make the decision you did last time, when she doesn't understand why you did it?

And these fears are not unjustified! For all that the Opportunist is in favour of schmoozing up to the Thorn, the moment she gives up the Blade, he turns into the Witch again, immediately suggesting the very choice that resulted in the very misery the Thorn is now struggling with (because the Opportunist is kind of an asshole). Even though you both know you need each other to get out of this mess long-term, actually doing that when you've both stabbed each other in the back previously is not easy, and giving in to those short-term impulses is so very tempting. How do the Scorpion and the Frog not kill one another?

And this provokes big argument in your own mind, too, long enough the Thorn gets worried she fucked up by giving you the Blade in this anxious way that doesn't understand why you haven't made either decision yet.

Fortunately, the Opportunist is joined by the Smitten at this point (and I think this is a bit of a redemption for the Smitten compared to the Damsel route, but that's a matter for another post), and he argues very passionately (because whenever does he not) in favour of the beauty of trust and cooperation and love!

And so by sharing your power and using it with care (the Narrator even tries to make you slip, but the Smitten says no), you resolve the pain at the heart of the Thorn, and finally make it clear that you do deserve her trust as she deserves yours, and you get arguably the best ending of a single run.

Of the Third Chapter Princesses, I think the Thorn stands out in becoming more... human compared to her previous, rather than less. It adds a lot of depth to her narrative, and makes the resulting romance feel more real than the other options.

And of the potential Witch follow-ups, I think the Thorn is a more interesting resolution than the Wild, because the Wild is more about burying the resentment and pain and pretend none of it happened and you're united as one, whereas the Thorn sees you actually resolve your differences and develop a more healthy relationship in the wake of it.

And you teach the Opportunist the value of long-term thinking, which is neat.

Also, you get the only kiss in the game on this route, so that's also fun.

In short, yeah, fantastic route, interesting and nuanced Princess, wonderful resolution.

#slay the princess #stp the thorn #stp the witch #stp the opportunist #stp the smitten #slay the princess spoilers #ask me

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vivmaek · 1 year

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HOW TO FIND JOY USING YOUR SUN PLACEMENT

Happiness is found when we are in touch with our higher selves. Look to the giver of life within your natal chart to come into alignment with joy.

Aries - Workout, chase after truth, surround yourself with people who match your energy, tap into an adrenaline rush, smile at yourself in the mirror everyday, don’t wait for desire to pass, take a hot bath, write out all your flaws on a piece of paper and then burn it, play video games, listen to loud music, do a face mask, eat tomatoes, do something you’re afraid of.

1st House - Write out all your best attributes, keep up with your appearance, find new beginnings within the everyday, take care of your body, meet someone new, showcase your identity, march to the beat of your own drum.

Taurus - Go for a hike, solve a puzzle, go to the art museum, eat a home cooked meal, buy yourself flowers, snuggle with something soft, wear your favorite perfume or cologne, clean your house, watch that tv show you’ve already seen a million times, get a neck massage, write an appreciation letter to yourself, create something with materials that can be found at home, eat fresh fruit.

2nd House - Keep a money jar, show up to work on time, show gratitude, keep up with a daily routine, write out all your values, take good care of your material possessions, make a list of priorities and stick to it, form healthy habits.

Gemini - Read a book, go on a spontaneous trip, watch something that makes you laugh, buy a concert ticket, run errands, put on some headphones and go for a walk, google questions, journal, dance to your favorite music, get a manicure, try out a new restaurant, rearrange your room, do yoga and practice breathwork, make a collage using cut up magazines, take a class on one of your favorite interests, smell some lavender.

3rd House- Write daily, keep up with your communications, always check your email, take special care of your siblings, don’t make a habit of turning down social events, be friendly towards your neighbors, try to learn something new everyday.

Cancer - Call family, put on pajamas, watch a movie that will make you cry, sit in the rain, drink something warm, cuddle with a pet, wear your favorite sweater, have a stash of goodies on hand, go home, read a fantasy novel, give someone a hug, eat seafood, go stargazing and have a picnic, stick your feet in the stream, write poetry.

4th House - Keep a tidy home, check up on family, daily hygiene, keep a mood journal, have some privacy, show kindness towards children, mother yourself.

Leo - Look at old childhood photos, brush your hair, lay out in the sun, put on an outfit that makes you feel your best, listen to music that boosts your confidence, daily affirmations, eat oranges and lemons, light a candle, hang out with your best friend, put on a performance when no one is watching, watch a dramatic romance movie, sing in the shower, get a back massage.

5th House - Romanticize your daily life, focus on what your love, chase after your passions, make time for play, showcase your creativity, connect to your inner child, make art, don’t be afraid to be dramatic.

Virgo - Create a new playlist, go to the craft store, tend to a garden, do your laundry, play the sims, watch video essays on youtube, join a book club, talk about your current interests with friends, make jewelry, hangout at a coffee shop, eat fresh veggies and clean food, talk to your plants, go for a walk and take pictures of whatever your find interesting, go to the farmers market.

6th House - Eat healthy, keep up with fitness and physical activity, have a daily system in order, showcase a healthy amount of criticism, take care of a pet, keep an organized house, find ways to be useful everyday, be of service to others

Libra - Grab dinner and drinks with your favorite people, write a love letter to yourself, have a shopping spree, post your thoughts on social media, stand up for someone when no one else is, invest in skincare, wear sunglasses, re-organize your room, lather your body with lotion and oils, eat cheese and yogurt, go to the gym, watch an old hollywood movie, buy a present for someone you love.

7th House - Focus on forming relationships, don’t rely on codependency, keep up with healthy boundaries, read over contracts carefully, be someone people can rely on, always be fair, share with people.

Scorpio - Watch a true crime documentary, make an offering to your ancestors, write your deepest thoughts in a journal and then keep it hidden, go skinny dipping, listen to music in the dark, spend time in nature to gather gems and crystals, play card games, do in depth research on your favorite artist, tend to your alter.

8th House - Don’t run from intimacy, keep up with your debts, take care of your property, discover mystery within the daily, keep a clean bathroom.

Sagittarius - Spend time by a campfire, book a plane ticket to somewhere, go out and party with your best friends, learn how to cook your favorite foreign meals, massage your legs, go thrift shopping, invite people over for a barbeque, read translated books, wear rings, eat plums and cherries, drink plenty of wine, have deep discussions over dinner.

9th House - Travel, ask for advice, pursue education, follow your own personal laws, appreciate different cultures, learn a second language, have strong ethics.

Capricorn - Sneak away for a well deserved break, buy something expensive, brush your teeth, go to a fancy restaurant by yourself, wear tailored pants, read a lengthy novel, give yourself a scalp massage, have a drink at the end of a long day, stay up late into the night, write out all your goals, eat lots of protein, be naughty when you can get away with it.

10th House - Keep a good reputation, follow through on your goals, focus on your career, implement structure within your daily life, be disciplined, use your expertise when appropriate.

Aquarius - Buy something you’ve put a lot of research into, go to the restaurant that only you seem to know about, write out everything you wish for, eat peaches, wear turquoise jewelry, design your own clothing, spend time on the computer, ghost everyone for the day, watch that tv show you’re newly obsessed with, join an exclusive club.

11th House - Be a good friend to people, belong to something larger than you, be socially aware, focus on humanitarian efforts, show respect to the technology you own, always look to the future.

Pisces - Go for a swim, have music constantly playing in the background, write out all your fantasies, get a pedicure, eat berries, do volunteer work, take up painting, wear silk, sleep in all day, daydream freely, lay on your back and cloud gaze, pray, make eye contact with people, wear warm socks, appreciate the background details.

12th House - Spend time alone, welcome endings with open arms, find closure, take up spiritual practice, show respect to the elderly, keep things hidden, maintain a dream journal, don't limit yourself .

Someone in my ask box sent me this really thoughtful question about how to use a natal chart to find happiness and I accidentally deleted it! My apologies!

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ubejamjar · 19 days

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B A S I C S

Name: Ajisai Kawanami

Nicknames:

Aji - Thancred and Alisaie

Aj (not AJ) - Aymeric occasionally in private frequently if they are both inebriated

Little star - Parents. Ajisai uses this as an endearment for children.

Age: Early 30s

Nameday: 7th Sun of the Sixth Astral Moon

Race: Raen Au Ra

Gender: Female

Orientation: Bisexual

Profession: Healer, Warrior of Light

P H Y S I C A L A S P E C T S

Hair: Naturally straight and deep blue, with lavender at the ends. She keeps it short as a matter of practicality and she doesn’t really know how to care for long hair. It grew out between Heavensward and Stormblood but she cut it just before going to that first meeting in Gridania.

Some kids taught her how to braid and she’s been doing it ever since.

Eyes: Orange-citrine with black limbal rings

Skin: Copper, think Southeast Asian; her scales are white

Tattoos/scars: Ajisai has many, many scars that she keeps covered because she wants to look respectable. One does not simply live a life as a soldier, pirate, and hero and avoid scars. I haven’t decided exactly what scars she has because I haven’t looked into putting them on her.

F A M I L Y

Parents:

-> Kana Kawanami Mother, samurai, former rice farmer and sake brewer, Doman Resistance Fighter.

Currently: Alive and fighting on the Gyr Abanian border under Lord Hien’s command.

-> Tatsuo Kawanami Father, geomancer, former rice farmer and sake brewer, conscripted Imperial healer, presumed dead.

Currently: Alive in Dalmasca (maybe?)

Siblings: None, though she thinks of Lyse, Alphinaud and Alisaie as her little brother and sisters. She adores Thancred as a brother, Y’shtola as an sister.

Grandparents: Murasaki Grandparents: Samurai who lived in Monzen; Kana's estranged parents. They died fighting in the rebellion. They never knew that Kana married, had a child, and lived in Namai.

Takemura: A priest at Shisui who raised Tatsuo as his own son. He was old already when Tatsuo was a child and long dead by present day.

In-laws and Other: The Fortemps: She treats them as extended family though their relationships are complicated. Despite Edmont's fondness for her, Ajisai feels he still holds her responsible for Haurchefant's death.

She is unmarried and unattached though she has romantic feelings for Aymeric (which I wrote an essay about)

Pets: None at the moment

S K I L L S

Abilities: Marksmanship - Great with a gun; refuses to use one ever again

Field Medicine - Aside from her healing magic and botanical knowledge, she is trained in Garlean combat surgery.

Life Sketching - Likes to draw everything she sees in her journals. She carries two at any given time -- one is personal, the other is meant as a gift for Aymeric but who knows if she’ll ever actually give it to him because she wrote a love letter in there.

Hobbies: Reading, specifically books about law and history; astromancy and divination; tea making; drawing; talking entirely too much to strangers; ruin diving; research into ancient civilizations

T R A I T S

Most Positive Trait: Compassion She genuinely cares about the people around her— she wants to do the most good she can do for as many people as she can. It isn’t just about penance, she likes seeing people happy and well.

Most Negative Trait Healing Hubris After years of harsh study and field training, Ajisai believes herself to be the best healer to the point she will not trust other people to heal herself, her companions, or loved ones. She spirals whenever she’s forced to confront the possibility someone might be beyond her abilities (like Haurchefant)

L I K E S

Colors: Summer sky blue, plum purple, lavender

Smells: Cinnamon and clove, sugared pecans, vanilla lavender, freshly baked cookies, pine needles, campfire smoke

Textures: Rough paper, plush blankets, river smooth stones, soft fur

Drinks: Ishgardian tea, hot cocoa, warm milk with honey and cinnamon

O T H E R D E T A I L S

Smokes: Only to be social

Drinks: Only drinks with Aymeric or alone. She drank heavily after the Vault, along with her sleeping potion use.

Drugs: Used sleeping potions to force herself to sleep and was considering using more… illicit substances to numb the pain before she started napping in the Congregation.

Mount Issuance: Story-wise, Ajisai didn’t join a Grand Company. She just.. wouldn’t leave one military to join another. She took porters and aetherytes until she got Pillion from Haurchefant. She calls him Pillion because Haurchefant said she could ‘ride pillion’, not realizing ‘pillion’ referred to the passenger behind the rider.

Been Arrested: Yes, probably for disturbing the peace in Limsa. Many tavern brawl taken too far, maybe some petty theft and other minor crimes before she got her shit together.

Tagged by: @paintedscales ❤️

Dragging these people into getting arrested with Ajisai: @oh-yeah-no @otherworldseekers @corsair-kovacs @amalthea-felsblood @thewitchofelpis @thevikingwoman @disciple-of-frost @viiioca @sasslett @gatheredfates @pumpkinmagekupo @starres-stuff @khaiens @aislingsurrow

If you were already tagged, consider yourself double-tagged or triple-tagged or—

#tag game #ajisaijar

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tiredkiwilol · 11 days

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randomly thought about that fic idea i had like a year ago. it was just a fic with hyrule and legend being turned into kids (like 8 and 6) and the rest of the chain slightly freaking out.

i had planned for warriors and twilight to take care of them and bond the most with them because i was like, wouldn’t it be cool for hyrule to end up trusting wars first because they’re both paranoid? and then legend and twi because they both were farmers/ranchers. i headcanon hyrule to be 12 when he starts his adventure and legend to be 9/10 so this would be both of them pre adventures.

anyway from what i (barely planned) hyrule would be turned into his 8 year old self and legend into his 6 year old self because i wanted a big brother hyrule (can you see how this is incredibly self indulgent?) by i dunno a wizrobe or something?

i think that hyrule would be very untrusting towards the chain at first (given the state of his hyrule) while legend is without the ✨knight trauma✨ and would be like: hey, uncle used to be a knight, if these people are knights then i’m sure they’re great people!!

anyway i wanted hyrule to find legend kinda annoying at first and be like:

H: stop following me

L: why?

H: because i’m running away from this weird group

L: why would you do that?

H: why would you trust people you just met?

then later hyrule becomes all protective because this kid is going to die out there on his own if he doesn’t watch him so obviously he needs to stick by him. and teach him skills. definitely not because this kid became sorta endearing, noooo way. he just needs to learn how to climb this tree and braid these flowers because it’s a life skill. not because it’s fun. he swears.

anyway this fic idea was gonna probably be just a bunch of one shots with barely any plot and at the end they would turn back to normal, no clue if i would have them remember anything or not.

soooo would any of you be interested in me writing this? (or writing your own spin?) however this would be the first real fic i’ve ever written and the only writing i’ve done recently is like essays so i can’t promise that it would be good. (might still do it anyway, but it depends on when that inspiration and productiveness punches me in the face sooo yeah)

anyway hope y’all have a great day!!

#linked universe #lu legend #lu hyrule #lu warriors #lu twilight #fic ideas #kiwi rambles #kiwi thoughts

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cryptotheism · 4 months

Note

Could you recommend any secondary sources on Pico della Mirandola? I’m writing an essay on him!

I started with the Hanegraaff Dictionary, and then followed the English sources it cited. Here's what I used for my section on him:

S.A. Farmer, Syncretism in the West: Pico’s 900 Theses (1486).

William G. Craven, Giovanni Pico della Mirandola: Symbol of His Age

Chaim Wirszubski, Pico della Mirandola’s Encounter with Jewish Mysticism

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sometimes-love-is-enough · 4 days

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Syzygy: Some Closing Thoughts

I'm writing this at 8pm on my backyard porch, under the wavering light of a distant full moon. Hello, moon! Please don't kidnap me. I just wanted to hang out with you for a while as I collect my final thoughts. It's a pretty cloudy night tonight, so it's not properly visible, which I suppose is the cloud cover shielding me from a terrible lunar fate. It gives a deliciously hazy atmosphere for the absolute essay I'm about to write.

Apparently, the Farmer's Almanac says that tonight's full moon is a 'Pink Moon', which sounds like it'd be a very pleasant viewing experience. I imagine pastel frangipanis spontaneously sprouting all over the moon's surface, covering every inch of its rocks and crags until the soft pink glow is visible from all the way down here on Earth. Unfortunately it's not named 'Pink Moon' because of that; there's some American environmental factors, etc.

I think it's kind of charming that there's a list of names for every possible full moon, as if the moon's putting on different masks or incarnations every time it tilts just enough that we can see its full face. I'm looking at a list of them now instead of writing these final notes like I probably should. The names are so delightful. Strawberry Moon. Sturgeon Moon. Apparently last month's full moon was Worm Moon. WORM MOON. I could go on. I won't. Let's talk about Syzygy instead.

Syzygy is... Man, where do I even start with this? Let's try the beginning. I started writing Syzygy in February of 2021, after ruminating on it for probably a few months before that, as I often do. That's three years ago, so my memories of the reasons why are a bit fuzzy, but I think I did it for two reasons: one, a desire to have a long-form meaty slowburn fic for a beloved rarepair in the tag so other people could enjoy it, and two, a fascination with the idea of fractured identity, what it means to be a Side without a Centre. The whole thing with the alternate-history steampunk swapped-around Earth came about naturally from that.

Except that's actually kind of a lie, because that's not the beginning, this began in 2020, when I wrote a pitch for a local station that was accepting radio play submissions (rejected, of course) featuring a hardboiled noir detective in a starlit city whose latest client was a tiny shiny girl asking him to solve her father's murder. And that's also a lie, because I think it really began when I tried to write an original novel in high school where the protagonist's name was Avery Allen, because I liked the way the name tripped off my lips.

My stories are always built on each other, especially stories I never get to write. They all recycle into each other in a weird blend of concepts and characters. 2021 was when I sat down and told myself I was going to write the Thomceit time loop fic, and I dove into it with aplomb. I can't recall the exact timeline of events, but at some point I underwent some truly gnarly health problems that left me unable to use my hands for extended periods of time, and so the fic that was meant to be for a Big Bang ended up... Just sitting in a folder for a while. But me and my beta managed to pull it the fuck together, and after adding some extra bits and pieces (the cutaways were a LAST MINUTE ADDITION even though I think they're some of my favorite bits in the whole thing) I started putting it all up.

Okay, there we go, that's enough of an abridged history of this thing. Let's just say: I never expected as many people to like it as it turned out, I thought that it would be a niche little fic for a rarepair, and I was honestly pretty content with that. So it was delightful to see so many people getting so into it, I have enjoyed the FUCK out of all of your comments and theories and predictions. It's been delightful when people predicted a plot point correctly, and honestly even more delightful when they predicted incorrectly. I've had such a blast.

As for the writing... Suffice to say I have many notebooks full of notes and thoughts, more than one spreadsheet to keep track of time loops and lore, and a semi-complete list of all of Virgil's tarot cards, which one day I'll probably polish and share properly, because I think the concept is neat. But that's kind of how it always goes with my writing.

Naming every inspiration for this would take forever and I'd still miss a few, but I'll just throw out a key few ones, because I gotta:

17776: What Will Football Look Like In The Future, because when I first read it I got the wrong idea and thought that Juice (Jupiter Icy Moons Explorer) was short for Betelgeuse (the star), and that sparked a whole thing about living stars in my brain. Also, just the general way that the worldbuilding and absurdity is handled in that world, it scratches my brain just right.

Welcome To Night Vale. I don't think I need to explain this one.

Madeleine L'Engle's writing, particularly A Wind In The Door, particularly-particularly the bit of it where Proginoskes explains why, precisely, he has to remember and Name every star in the universe. Fucking beautiful book.

A particular Untamed/Mo Dao Zu Shi fic I read years ago and haven't been able to track down again, which also features two people stuck in a time loop who are initially unaware that they're in it together AND dying at the same time. I believe they also meet on a bus? The details are fuzzy. The worldbuilding and descriptions of that fic were so stunning to me, it had me unable to read anything for a solid few weeks, it is definitely a superior work to mine in every respect. If anyone finds it, let me know, I don't think I finished reading it and want to know how it ends.

An unpublished fic that I had the privilege to read while it was being written, that changed my brain chemistry re: the Sides unknowingly existing without Thomas. The Flowerwall Cafe originally hails from this one, too, graciously borrowed and greatly beloved.

Both Ghibli films in general AND Dianna Wynne Jones books in general, and obviously the intersection between the two, Howl's Moving Castle, which is fascinating in how both mediums handle the setting.

The Doctor Who audio drama Scherzo, which is a wild ride, and there's a major plot point revolving around the two main characters holding hands and fusing gruesomely into each other - and another involving an in-story fairy tale.

There was no huge inspiration for the clockwork city and weird steampunk carriages, apart from (perhaps) Fallen London. Certainly, the idea of a background organization that wants to kill the sun, who also happens to be a sentient being, is cribbed from the Liberation of Night.

Syzygy also happens to be packed full of many obscure references to... like... personal projects of mine, some published and some unpublished, as well as a lot of my friends and co-writers, and some really REALLY niche stuff that only I will ever properly understand. I buried a lot of myself into this story, is what I'm saying. Juice hails from a completely different project (a TTRPG with my friends, of which she is a beloved and cherished NPC), the in-universe author for Avery Allen (and Mallory Wynn too) are named for a fictional TV author I created when the writing discord was making a nonexistent fandom, Logan's dumpling recipe is my favorite recipe of all time.

I have an apartment ghost, too. I talk to it regularly.

Final thank-yous, because I want to post this very very soon, I've been typing for too long and the mosquitoes are starting to get to me. Thank you to:

Everyone on the TSS writing server who listened to me complain while I was writing it the first time round, and has subsequently listened to me complain while editing it these past two years. So many people in there are responsible for little bits and pieces - phrasings, words, nicknames, jokes - and I couldn't begin to name everyone who helped.

Saphira and the rest of the people who are currently working on making a full-cast audio drama out of this fic (???) (???!!!!??) (!!!!). It is SO baffling to me that it's happening, I'm in complete disbelief whenever we talk about it or I see the script or I get asked logistics questions, I'm terrified and thrilled to see how it turns out, what the fuck! The very existence of that project has ended up influencing a few things about this fic's endgame, too.

Everyone who's commented extensively, commented entire academic analyses, commented numbered lists, commented laconically, left a single emoji in the comments, left kudos, bookmarked it, sent me asks on Tumblr, given me thumbs-ups on Discord, or even just silently read the fic without interacting at all. Your witness brings my words to existence. Love you love you love you.

And Len, who lives in my brain and my body and my heart and my throat, and who is honestly singlehandedly responsible for dragging this fic out of the depths of Google Docs and into the arms of AO3. They've already said I don't need to thank them, but come on, I totally do. Len is the best beta, and puts up with all sorts of deranged nonsense from me, because I have an unhinged writing process where I don't think about anything before I put it down on the page, and I use way too many connecting-dashes and not enough semicolons. Kisses kisses kisses. Thanks for doing this with me, and I can't wait to do it again.

Myself. I managed to write this and I managed to finish it. That makes me a pretty cool person, all things considered. I'm glad I did this.

What next? I've got to rest. Well, I need to get some things done... and then rest. I've been juggling a hellish amount of projects for a while now, and now Syzygy's finally cleared from my plate, I'm going to try to let the others get cleared too so I can take some time and be less stressed. The Locked Tomb AU will be ongoing, as I get through final edits of chapters, so keep an eye out for that - if you're interested in a fic that's rather less starry and shiny, but very much Thomceit and death themes, check it out - and then....... Well, whatever comes next, whenever I have the energy to do it. I adore writing in this fandom. I'll be back with something weird soon enough.

Ad astra, baby! It's been a blast.

- Min (2024)

#Syzygy #author's note

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