#whether that helped or not no one will ever know. i have to work on other things so im putting a hard cutoff now

[minkdelovely]

love and power

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chapter eight

“i want everything i asked for.”

Alastor x Fem!Reader ; MDNI 18+ ; [y/n] used sparingly ; Alias in Hell is Sylvie

tags/warnings: ‘fuck it, do him scared!’ or whatever the saying is, no plot cuz y’all have had enough of that, pheromones are putting in work cuz you have heart eyes, y’all are touch-starved and pent up, half-transformation demon alastor (i hope that makes sense lol), implied demon alastor, little bit of angst or even hurt/comfort at the end? 🥲 smut: clothes ripping, scratching, oral sex (fem receiving), fingering, slight degradation & praise kink dynamics, blood play & biting, handjob, orgasm denial, cream pie

word count: 6.6k *maniacal laughter*

author’s note: it wouldn’t be right to start this off without a formal apology for the cliffhanger and then, subsequently, the publishing delay 🥲✨ this ended up being more of a labor of love than i had expected; i just seemed to have such bad luck, this week of all weeks. thank you for your patience, and i hope this makes up for it! @hazelfoureyes one of these days i’ll have some more for you, but until then darling, you ever so kindly ‘asked’ me for smut so… 💅🏻💖

prelude ; chapter one ; chapter two ; chapter three ; chapter four ; chapter five ; chapter six ; chapter seven ; chapter eight

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Alastor meant for it to be chaste, really he did. And while he had desperately hoped for acceptance, the ardor with which you returned the kiss was unexpected. The grip of your hands around his wrists was fierce, pulling him in; fingers like sticky fibers against the patch of bare skin nestled between his gloves and the cuff of his shirt. 

So you were hungry, too… He couldn’t help but smile against your mouth at the thought. 

Finally, his luck was turning around.

✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧

When you offered your help to Alastor, a kiss was the last thing you ever expected. 

Actually, you had been fully prepared for him to hurt you somehow, whether it was his intention or not. He had gotten upset so quickly, you assumed it must have been residual animosity from the meeting with Valentino that he could no longer contain. The more you thought about it, you truly understood how degraded he must have been by the whole affair, filling you with a guilt you worried might never go away. He needed a victory.

So offering your help was the least you could do.

But you never could have imagined the way he took your face in his strong hands, holding you with such care despite the intensity roiling off him in his half-formed demonic state. The strain on his face as he struggled to compose himself, his eyes switching back from black with red dials to that familiar searing red. The storming hunger you saw in them, half-lidded, as he closed the gap between you…

Your mind was practically rendered blank, running on instinct; the warm ache throbbing between your hips quickly taking up any remaining space that was left.

His mouth was softer than you expected but his press against you was firm and wickedly practiced. You felt him smile against you and for a moment you forgot to breathe, the resulting gasp being the perfect opportunity for Alastor’s tongue to snake into your mouth. If your eyes hadn’t already been closed, they would have rolled to the back of your head. His tongue was soft and big and hot, his movements steady and filled with purpose; not a drop of wasted effort. You could only hope to keep up…

It was such arduous work keeping your hands at his wrists, floored by the intense desire you had to reach out and touch him. But you didn’t know your limits here. He was still riled up — if anything, you had heard his antlers grow — and you didn’t want to make any wrong moves.

So you put all your longing into the grip of your fingers and mouth, your mind wandering on the feeling of him. Large, elegant hands cupping your face like glass. His body looming over you, offering shelter you were more than willing to accept. His mouth so hot against yours it would leave you feeling cold once it was gone. And he smelled so good this close, smoky and verdant like a bonfire on a crisp autumn night. 

Your thighs rubbed together from the pulse radiating there, and he let out a small groan against your mouth as your nails absently dug into the skin of his wrists. The sound of him simultaneously made your legs weak and fanned the flame between them. His voice had always been nice — he didn’t build a career for himself on the radio for nothing — but you felt a growing fear at the aspect of never hearing something like that again after he was sated; knowing that no matter what it would haunt you for eternity. 

I really am so fucked…

He was pecking now, his breath and teeth and tongue ghosting over your swollen mouth and face as he feverishly placed multiple at a time. You wanted to reciprocate so badly, whether with your lips or hands, but it was clear he needed to ravish you first so you stayed put in a shocking exhibit of will-power. But when you felt the tug of his teeth against the corner of your jaw you couldn’t stop the shaky moan that escaped you, not even noticing how your hips rolled on nothing but air.

That’s all it took. 

Alastor pulled away and gave a quick kiss to your hands before dropping them to take up the torn fabric of your collar. He gave it a sharp pull, tearing your dress straight through to the waist; the sound ringing out in the quiet of your room with the promise of what’s to come. You were too stunned by the suddenness of the action, but the look on your face must have really been something if the expression you were seeing on his was any indication — ravenous and wild. 

Your chest heaved with quickening breath, heartbeat kicking and head empty as you felt all the blood in your body rushing down. Too overwhelmed by the intensity of it all, you dared to bury your face in his chest, grateful to be just tall enough to reach. Mortifying as it was, it was all you could think to do. 

Though safety wasn’t the only thing you found, pressing in so close to him like this, your throat going dry at the feeling of his arousal against you. No amount of time or experience could have prepared you for this, for him. You were beginning to think that there would be nothing left once he was through with you.

Just need a minute…

Mercifully, he let you. Even going so far as to cradle you against him, cupping the back of your head with his left hand. You relaxed into him, a hot puff of air leaving your mouth to soak into the fabric of his clothes. Alastor’s pleased hum in response vibrated against your face, and you brought your hands up to grip the lapels of his coat for fear of crumbling at his feet.

As you steeled yourself, he didn’t desist from his poking and prodding at your exposed back with his free hand. It disappeared briefly, followed by the faint sound of something falling to the carpet before the air was ripped from your lungs at the touch of his hot, bare skin against yours. You whined into his chest as your back arched against his palm, your fingers nearly ripping through his coat with the force of your grip, earning a gruff and sinister chuckle from him. Being able to bask in the feeling of the rumble in his chest against you was a lovely consolation, though. And just under that… his heartbeat. 

His hand against your back regained your attention then, scratching and massaging at its leisure; nails tracing indistinguishable shapes along your skin. Traveling up and down your spine at first,then your shoulders and, finally, the back of your neck where he paused. 

His message read loud and clear: time was up. 

Alastor pulled you away from him with a gentle firmness, managing to handle you with care despite his clear desire for haste. You could see it burning in his eyes with no intent to extinguish any time soon. He was so mystifying like this, you couldn’t help but drink him in. Stately, powerful… beautiful. It seemed impossible now that you had ever been afraid of him in this state of half-transformation. He didn’t seem to mind the admiration, soft smile and lust-heavy eyes radiating with ego.

His antlers look so handsome when they’re branched out like this…

“Shouldn’t you have offered to take my coat by now? I’m your guest, aren’t I?” he teased as he swiped your dumbstruck mouth with the pad of his thumb. The filter dipped in and out over his quiet, low tone of voice, sending a fresh wave of heat to your core and cheeks as you fought the urge to nuzzle your face against his bare hand. How had he already reduced you to this? “But I suppose I haven’t been well-mannered myself. Just look at what’s become of your dress.”

His face was smug as he played with the decimated fabric, fingers dancing across your exposed neck and shoulders before pulling down the long sleeves. They had been the glue, apparently, your dress falling past your hips with ease and into a heap on the floor in near silence. Goosebumps pricked your skin as you stood before him in your underwear, already feeling naked as he took you in. You noticed him focus in on your shoulder and neck, the draw of his eyebrows confirming your earlier suspicion that he had left a bruise.

“It’s fine, it didn’t hurt,” you lied self-consciously, unable to keep the nerves out of your voice. It sounded like an apology. He hadn’t meant it and in the grand scheme of things was a bruise really so bad? It would be gone before you knew it.

He didn’t seem convinced, a sound of disapproval coming from behind his closed lips before a smile took its place. “Hmm… if you say so. Perhaps a kiss to make it better?”

Alastor wasted no time leaning down to place his mouth there, and you sighed as the heat of his wide, wet tongue swiped over it before he closed his lips with a small smack. As he nuzzled in — kissing, licking, sucking, nipping — your shaky fingers took to the task of unbuttoning his coat as he had suggested. The action earning you a growl and a bite, not yet enough to break the skin but taking your breath away all the same; the fire in your belly now flickering up into your chest.

Once the coat was loose you ran your hands under it, starting near his waist to travel up his chest until you reached his broad shoulders. Was he the one who was so hot, or was it you? It was impossible to tell. You used the top of your hands to start working the coat off of him, and he paused from his effort at your neck to assist with removing his arms from it before tossing it off to the side — his remaining glove along with it. You caught sight of the saliva glistening around his mouth and chin before he resumed his station and didn’t even try to hold back the soft moan that escaped you.

What was the point?

With a snarl — that was the closest thing you could think to call it — his hands hooked behind your knees and hiked you up, your legs instinctively wrapping around him for purchase as you gasped. Alastor’s mouth found yours again and you held his face to keep steady as you hunched over him, tears forming at the corner of your closed eyes from the relief of being able to touch him this time.

This kiss wasn’t as poised as the first had been. It was hurried and open-mouthed, messy and deep. Not enough, not enough, not enough. You broke away this time, seizing your opportunity to explore his face with your lips as he had yours. His claws bit into the flesh of your ass as your mouth latched onto his neck, sucking at the pulse you found there. The resulting buck of your hips from the action and the moan he let out only pulling another from both of you.

You didn’t even notice that he had been walking until you were suddenly tossed onto the bed, his body immediately caging you in beneath him. You hooked your legs around him as he ground into you, your cry of pleasure from the friction echoing off the walls. He did it again and you whined, squirming, his hands on either side of your head as he leered down; red eyes glowing with satisfaction.

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Alastor took a moment to take in the sight before him, feeling his eyes glitch as he roamed over your flushed face.

He made quick work of grabbing your face with one hand to pucker your mouth before returning to explore it with his tongue. It surprised him how much he was enjoying this; kissing you with abandon, somehow never scratching the incessant itch despite his efforts. He captured your bottom lip with his teeth, resiliently managing not to bite straight through it as you moaned into his mouth.

“Alastor…!” 

His name was a song on your breath, scorching down from his ears to his cock, all of which reacted with a twitch.

One string loose. 

How many more would he need to cut before you went slack?

Who had bound you up like this in the first place? It certainly hadn’t been him. On the contrary, he was so eager to see you torn open and bare, stripped of all the little secrets tangled like knots on your tether to him. Always keeping your guard up around him wasn’t only irritating… it was selfish. And there was only one of you here allowed that luxury. 

Still, this was quite the consolation prize, seeing you surrender to him so easily. He had barely gotten started and you were already making such a pretty face for him; a new favorite, even. Your little pout that normally inspired vexation looked sweet like this, swollen with his kisses. It was an image he would soon not forget, being so much better than what he had imagined.

Your scent had truly blossomed now, dizzying him with the potency of its floral, nutty musk; just a hint of sweetness underneath. It complimented his own smokey, green, and bitter scent so well. But Alastor was ready to make his next new discovery, his hips finally lifting away from you as he gave you a final peck on the mouth.

“Hmmm, delicious as your mouth is, there’s another place I’m quite eager to kiss.” He could feel the wickedness on his face as he said it, unable to contain the static that flared around him as you breathed out a curse, body trembling.

Alastor made a slow descent, teasing you with licks and bites and kisses to draw out as many moans and whimpers as he could from you. Such music you made for him. Only for him. It was a good thing he had already resolved to avoid sleep as much as he could in the future; he wouldn’t get much anyway with the sounds you made ringing in his head like church bells.

He could see the damp soaked into your underwear before he even touched them, already intoxicated by the smell and heat wafting off your core. He’d have to be careful here… not an easy task, but he’d manage. The self-advised warning did little to stop him from tearing the garment in half with ease, enjoying the wide-eyed look you gave him as you quickly propped up on your elbows from the sound.

“I’d apologize for frightening you, but I’m afraid I wouldn’t mean it,” he said, holding your gaze as he palmed your bare sex, thrilled by how wet you already were. You were having such a hard time keeping your composure, serving only to egg him on. He hummed and continued, almost surprised by the words that came out of his mouth, “You don’t seem to mind, though… how lewd.”

Your head fell back with a loud whine, arms giving out so that you were flat on your back again; face scarlet as his fingers moved against you, collecting your arousal. His dick throbbed against him at the sight, leaking onto his skin and clothes. He couldn’t help the hiss that spilled from between his teeth when he tested you with his middle finger, tight as you were wet.

“Oh my… it’s been a while for you too, hm? I’m honored,” he cooed, relishing the way you whimpered and clenched at his words. “I do worry how you’ll fare… Contrary to the restraint I’ve shown so far, I must warn you… I don’t have the capacity for gentleness today.”

Your eyes shot open with shock, and with that he removed his finger and brought it up, putting the entirety of it in his mouth to suck you off as you watched. His eyes closed in pleasure, groaning as his tongue lapped up every bit of you, savoring every second. Clean and tart… like a ripe summer cherry. He couldn’t stop the bit of drool that escaped the corner of his mouth, the rush of saliva incensed by your taste coming on too quickly to swallow it all.

Alastor was breathing hard through his nose, a fresh wave of hunger — he wasn’t sure what else to call it — trembling through him with a fierce burning need. His smile and voice were sharp, static fraying as he spoke, “Hmmm… My imagination wasn’t even close. Aiming to please, dear?”

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His fascination with licking you off him would be your second-death. Not only that, but you hadn’t expected him to say any of the obscene things that were spilling from his mouth, let alone the way you were responding to them. You had been subject to dirty talk before and enjoyed it (if done well), but… there was just something about it all coming from Alastor that set your veins on fire.

“Alastor, please, it’s embarrassing,” you pleaded through gasps, watching through half-open eyes as he licked away at his hand. You felt as if you had a fever, your face was so hot, hair already beginning to stick to your forehead with sweat.

As if falling on deaf ears, he merely proceeded to give a sharp tug to his bowtie, removing it in one go before unbuttoning his shirt. Something about the harsh way he pulled his shirt from the belted waist of his pants made you dizzy, but you felt a scream die in your throat watching the way his shoulders and chest moved as he freed his arms, with just the slightest flex of his abdomen; your eyes unable to resist following the trail of hair below his navel that disappeared under his belt.

You had made peace with your budding attraction to him — it was easier that way, considering your near-constant state of proximity — but this felt like being tossed directly into the fire.

Burning at the stake.

As he towered over you, you took in the large, pink scar lacerated across his chest from left shoulder to the right side of his ribcage. There had been mentions of the battle against Adam and his Exorcists within the group; how terrifying it had been, how brave everyone was. The loss of their friend Sir Pentious, who had died trying to help protect them against Adam. That was when the conversation normally tapered off, the grief still too close at his loss, but also because of what led up to it.

From what you understood, Adam had been Alastor’s appointed target to handle. One he was unmatched against, if the scar was any indication. A killing blow he had managed to survive. You hoped the pity you felt wasn’t making its way into your gaze as you looked at him, knowing he’d dislike it. Still… You sat up with hands stretched out, the instinct to touch and comfort him too strong to fight. But he pushed you back down, a shadow coming over his face as bent over you. 

“Patience, sweetheart. I still owe you a kiss.”

You didn’t have time to process the dismissal before he raked his nails on your skin as he dipped down, your back arching up to meet them as you breathed through the small sting of pain. A splash of sobriety hit you as you felt the heat of his breath hovering over your cunt, your stomach tight as he moved closer, a wanton cry as he finally lapped at you with his tongue; a slow, wide, firm sweep from hole to clit. Sealed with a kiss, as promised.

You shuddered and gripped the duvet as if your life depended on it. The image of him nestled between your legs making your brain short-circuit. His eyes were shrouded with a predation that should have terrified you. So why did it thrill you instead?

 “Oh my god…”

That wicked grin of his…

“Last I checked, Hell is the absence of God. Let’s try again, shall we?” 

He hiked your legs over his shoulders, looped his arms around to grab the top of your thighs, and pulled you to his mouth. You saw white as he wasted no time in setting a voracious pace, his tongue dipped into you — long and thick — as his nose pushed against your clit with every open-and-close of his mouth. His chin providing a pleasant hardness that nearly knocked the wind out of you.

He was incessant. 

Sucking, prodding, licking, and swallowing; a starving man who may never eat or drink again. Your hands found purchase on his antlers, a bit smaller now but still looming, earning a moan of approval into your heat that blossomed in your chest. The room was filled with the sound of wet smacks and a harmony of throaty groans from him; keening, breathy moans from you. Both unabashed.

In between breathing his name, words were tumbling from your mouth that you couldn’t register, too lost in the feeling of him on you. Not just your pussy, but your legs, too. His hands gripping your thighs so fiercely as your hips rolled against his face that you hoped for bruises. A keepsake. It was impossible to know if this would ever happen again.

You hadn’t even realized you were slipping away from yourself until he pulled back with a sharp gasp, finally coming up for air, jerking his antlers from your hands. The lower half of his face shimmered with a blend of your arousal and his spit, the sclera of his eyes gone black, dials taking the shape of his red irises. Again, your arms reached out, shaking from the effort as you tried to catch your breath. 

“Kiss…,” you barely managed to say, dizzied as you were.

Alastor obliged, climbing up to your open hands as you pulled him down to you, unable to find the strength to meet him halfway. He flinched as you ran your tongue over his left cheek, licking up some of the mess there as he wiped at the other side with the back of his hand. The taste of your combined fluids sent a jolt of pleasure through you and you moaned through the sloppy, open-mouthed kiss that followed. The laugh that escaped him was sinister but sent another wave of warmth through you all the same.

He rewarded you with a finger, followed quickly by another. And before you knew it, another. Pumping in and out of you with a delicious stretch and a maddeningly consistent pace before they curled, teasing your spongy core as his thumb circled your clit at the switch; the sudden onset of your orgasm had your body trembling under his touch.

“Ohh… mm, fuck…! Hmmmnn… Ah—! Alasto—ahh!”

“I know, sweetheart, I know.” His voice was rough but soothing. A crackle of static melded into your moans and the wet sounds of your cunt, and he gave his head a violent shake as if to clear it. There was nothing but a growling need when he spoke next. “I’ve got you, don’t fight it. Let me see how pretty that sullen face of yours looks when you cum…!”

It was all too much. Just the intensity of his eyes on yours boxed in between your hands holding his face could have sent you over the edge. But his words again, that pet name… 

The tether snapped so viciously you were fairly certain you passed out for a moment, your vision gone black as you screamed. Only to be brought back to consciousness by Alastor’s fingers slowly riding the wave of your orgasm, no longer stroking with purpose — you were clenched around him so tightly his previous pace would have probably injured you both — but with a languid solace. Graciously accepting every roll of your hips into his hand as you moaned his name and gasped for breath.

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God, it was so fucking satisfying to see your face twisted up, eyebrows knit and your pouty lips salaciously framing your open mouth as you cried out for him. Another perfectly shattered expectation, much like the rest of this experience had been. He didn’t even mind that your eyes were shut. The consolation being the glimpse he caught of them rolling to the back of your head before they were out of sight. That, and, this would only be your first. He was determined to get at least one more out of you before this was over, truly unsure how much you could handle.

He was surprising even himself, speaking to you in the manner he was. He enjoyed a good tease, but he couldn’t recall going to this extent before. Perhaps it was a result of the pheromones, but he simply couldn’t seem to help it. The reactions it was pulling from you were too exhilarating to deny himself… and by extension, you.

His static was filling the air, buzzing with the energy of a lightning storm as he sucked you off his fingers once more with a snarl; his free hand sloppily undoing his belt before giving it a freeing tug, desperately hard erection weeping slightly at the bit of alleviation. As the realization that he was preparing to enter you sunk in another ripple of goosebumps pinpricked his skin, causing him to bite down on the inside of his lip from the sensation.

The taste of his own blood came with inspiration.

Alastor tucked back some of your damp hair before bringing his face down to meet yours, swiping at your lips with his blood-coated tongue. Testing the waters. Your eyebrows drew together and you stretched underneath him, as if waking from a night’s sleep, before blinking your eyes open. He watched as your tongue responded with a quick prod of what he had left there, and felt his smile grow when you let out a hum of content.

He would never tire of being right.

“I thought you might like that, my little killer… Have some more,” he whispered against you. Giving your lips another rough lick before taking your mouth again, groaning into each other as your tongue soothed his still-bleeding lip.

✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧

Something about this kiss was different.

There was a fierceness this time that hadn’t been there before, no doubt spurred on by the blood pooling in Alastor’s mouth. It had been shocking to taste at first but then… you found that it wasn’t too bad. Diluted with saliva, it was almost sweet, and you relished the way he enjoyed your tasting of it.

Your hands traveled up to the back of his head, gently scratching the prickly velvet of his undercut with one while the other pulled at the hair on his crown. His hiss into your mouth made you moan with another jump of your hips, and you felt him shift over you then; vaguely aware of the sound of him unceremoniously tugging down his pants before he took your hand from his crown and brought it between you.

The gasp that escaped you was sharp, your hand instinctively wrapping around his length as he guided you through stroking him. He was so hard, wet, and heavy, burning to the touch, but distant alarms were ringing about your ability to take him all. It scared you how much you wished to try.

His moan of relief was another keepsake, the sound of it so soft and pleading in your ear that you nearly sobbed from your desire. You couldn’t help but wonder what his face looked like, making a sound like that, and found yourself jealous of the skin of your neck he was hiding in. You stayed like this for a moment, his hand leaving you to work on its own as he cradled the opposite side of your head to lick and kiss your neck between gasps and moans. With a final nip to your skin Alastor pulled back, the mattress dipping as he put all of his weight onto his forearm to the right of your head as he adjusted himself.

“Don’t close your eyes,” was all he said before pressing into you, the tip of his cock already threatening to overwhelm you as it teased your entrance. 

It was not an easy task, your eyebrows drawing together in such a way that it nearly blurred your vision. You whined between closed lips, doing your best to breathe through the sweet stretch of him finally entering you. Despite his direction, he didn’t seem to be doing much better; sweat beading on his forehead over furrowed brows, kiss-swollen mouth open with panting breaths. Flushed cheeks. Even in the state he had reduced you to, you were trying to sear the image of his lust-strained face into your psyche.

He was rocking his hips slowly, allowing you to adjust to him with each little thrust as your arousal coated him, easing his advance; breathy moans collecting between you in puffs of steam, joining the two of you together in all the places you weren’t touching. 

All the while, your eyes were locked on each other. Had anyone else ever seen his the way they were now and found them beautiful instead of horrifying? You moaned as you stared at him; taking in his large, elegant antlers and sweat-damp hair, reminding you of the bedhead you had seen the other morning. His handsome and sinister face. He could easily tear you to shreds — and in a certain way, he was — but you were overwhelmed at the amount of care he had shown you so far, even with his earlier warning. 

His thrusts were building in sharpness, parting you with a tantalizing push-and-pull until he finally bottomed out with a growl. You cried out from the fullness he gave you, already twitching around him despite his stillness as he gave you both a moment to try and catch your breath. 

Alastor peppered your face with kisses and licks as you relaxed into him, testing you with a shallow thrust that had you biting down on your lip. Another. Another. Another. Until your mouth was hanging open, your hands traveling up to hold onto his triceps in your need for stability and to keep him close. Suddenly you felt him leave you completely, not even able to process the emptiness before he slammed back into you with a harsh grunt that made you squeal; writhing as he pressed up into your cervix.

He must have really enjoyed that, because he did it again. And again. And again. Settling into an excruciatingly blissful pace, his hard length massaging knots out of your body you didn’t know where there. Your legs instinctively hooked around him, nails digging into the flesh of his arms as you gasped and whined.

“So — ah..! Good… Alastorrr…!”

“Fuck!” he hissed between gritted teeth as your hips bucked, brows knit tight as he shook his head as if to clear a fog. 

You didn’t know he was actually trying to keep something at bay, the additional inch of growth in his antlers lost on you in your current state.

✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧

Alastor’s hips stuttered for a moment before muscle memory guided him back to rhythm, desperate to regain the bliss that was torn from him. It had been a close call, but he managed to keep the switch from happening. Though the monster inside was still there, clawing at him just below the surface. 

He felt as your hands move from their place on his triceps (which he had quite enjoyed) to settle on his chest, your fingers delicately tracing his scar. The line wasn’t steady though, perforated by the impact of his thrusts, which you were handling with a surprising welcomeness. 

It was almost…

There it was again, lying in wait; that ravenous, goading shadow roiling inside of him.

Take the risk…

Could he, though? Composing himself was practically second-nature, after all…

Say it!

Alastor exhaled, somewhere between a growl and a sigh. “You’re doing so well, sweetheart.” He allowed himself to relish the sound of your cry and the blissed out look on your face, which in turn provided a moment to steel himself before continuing, “I didn’t think you’d be this greedy.”

“Fuuuck…! Alast — oh my god…!”

A fresh wave of your arousal flooded over him as you desperately rolled your hips to meet him, but the intention had been to make you climax — and judging by the way you were spasming around him, you were close. Not drive him to his own at the sight of your glowing eyes, just as they had that day in the alley.

He had miscalculated.

With an agonizing force of will he pulled out of you, harsh breaths straining his lungs as he got off the bed to hastily remove his pants and shoes. He groaned through the ripple of adrenaline that was tearing through him, heartbeat pounding in his ears like a drum, the feeling of it causing his hair to stand on edge. Fuck. He wouldn’t be able to hold it off… not this time.

“What’s wrong?” Despite the question, your voice was still so thick with lust that it made his back hunch over.

It was taking all he had not to wrap his arms around himself in what he knew would be a useless attempt at containment. Even breathing was painful. The air saturated with the smell of sweat and sex and Valentino’s goddamn pheromones!

I really am going to kill that son of a bitch!

“Alastor…?”

✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧

Burning at the stake.

It had been a good way to put it.

He had been burning you alive before dousing you with ice.

What had gotten into him? What had gotten into you? No one had ever said something like that to you before and received anything but a slap in the face. Greedy… The word made your heart stutter, some of the blood from the lower half of your body traveling back up to your face. Was it true? 

Embarrassment was beginning to sober you up. Had you gone too far? It seemed strange that you had, considering the words came from his mouth and not yours. Fuck, all of this had started because of him. How else had he wanted you to react? Or was he ashamed of himself? 

Was he regretting this already? 

“What’s wrong?”

You watched as his back arched up like a spooked cat, the force of his breathing revealing the ribs and notches of spine under the skin. He looked like he was in pain… Maybe the scar on his chest wasn’t as healed as it seemed? You climbed off the bed and made a timid approach.

“Alastor…?” 

He flinched at the touch of your hand with a hiss, the shock of his reaction making you trip over yourself and fall back onto the bed. He kept his back to you when he spoke next, the absence of his filter making you shiver in pleasure and worry.

“You remember what I told you earlier, yes?”

I don’t have the capacity for gentleness today.

How could you not remember that? 

“I do,” you answered, just above a whisper.

He straightened himself then, still turned away from you and managing to look regal despite his trembling. “I need you on all fours… and you must promise not to turn around. Do you understand?”

It was a question that didn’t leave room for any response other than yes. So you just positioned yourself on the bed, facing your headboard and gathered the pillows there underneath you for support. You had just finished settling when you felt his weight dip the mattress behind you, heart in your throat as he ran his nails down your spine before slipping his fingers into you.

You both sighed as he pumped you, filling the room with that familiar lewd sound between breaths. Stoking the embers of your stolen orgasm with every drag, until he removed them completely. You whined at his absence, the tightness in your belly teetering somewhere between pleasure and pain as you heard him shudder through stroking himself. His free hand resting now on your hip.

“Don’t get comfortable. If you cum facing away from me I’ll never touch you again.” His voice was tight with effort, the filter over it harsh and pocketed as he adjusted himself behind you, the grip of his hand on your left hip promising to bruise. 

To your shame, the threat alone almost made you, a graceless moan tumbling out from your chest as you barely managed to nod your head in confirmation; your cunt flexing around the words echoing in your mind. The obscene sight of it drew out a sound from Alastor that could only be described as animalistic, earning the plump skin of your hip a few punctures as he thrust into you, bottoming out.

It was a brutal pace, his cock nearly leaving you with every thrust before plunging back in. He still had one hand on your hip while the other grabbed your shoulder, the slapping sound of your skin meeting quickly overpowering the gasps and moans falling from your mouths.

“Haahhh… nnghh…! …fuck!”

“Alastor…”

You felt him twitch inside of you at the sound of this name before he practically shouted, “Again…!”

The blush burned down from your face into your chest, but you complied and whined his name again. And again. Until it seemed to be the only word you knew.

“Ohhh, fuuuck…,” he hissed, followed quickly by a snarl.

You could’ve sworn you heard fabric tearing before a green glow reflected off the lacquered wood of your headboard. Alastor’s huge silhouette taking shape as it intensified; invoking the image of a nightmarish spider more than the deer demon you knew. You closed your eyes and buried your face in the pillows you had gathered, refusing to turn around despite your instinct to do so. And even through the fear, you still felt your orgasm building, the battle to keep it at bay quickly turning against your favor. 

“Alastor… I… I can’t… I—”

The words were stolen as he suddenly bit into your shoulder, his mouth so wide you felt his teeth sink in from shoulder blade to collarbone. You screamed into the pillows as his hips stuttered, until there was a final thrust so deep it would have pained you if it weren’t for your throbbing shoulder. His seed spilled out hot and thick, fueling the aching fullness inside you as he grunted into your flesh; teeth still latched to you as if making a primal claim.

Hot tears fell down your face as he rode out his orgasm behind you, unsure if they were caused by the savage bite to your bruised shoulder or lament over the deprivation of seeing his face. But you had done as you were told, managing not to turn around or climax. The bite he was now nursing with licks and sucks and kisses providing plenty of distraction.

Almost too much…

As he tried to catch his breath, you could feel him shrinking behind you as he pulled out, his slick torso laying flat against your back as he lapped up the blood dribbling from the bite. And in between his kisses that traveled from your shoulder to your tear-stained face, his hands were petting you with such a tenderness it only wrought more tears. 

His soothing whispers of shhh, I know, I’m sorry, I’ve got you, I’m sorry ringing in your ears as he brought you to lie down, cradling you to him as he caressed your face with his hands that inflicted such pain* and comfort… protection.

For what seemed like hours, the two of you laid in silence, looking into each other’s eyes as his thumb stroked your cheek. Until finally you buried your face into his chest, hands over his heart.

And slipped into shadow.

✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧     ✧     ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧

*to others lol

ps: phew! we fucking made it y’all… i truly hope it was worth the wait. but i do want to announce here that i will be taking a little break. i know this one was already late, but it kinda took a piece of my soul lmao since we only have two more chapters i need to make sure i have all my ducks lined up to wrap this with a pretty little bow. thank you for your patience and love, i really do appreciate you. and i’ll see you on may 5th 💖

tag list: @fairyv-ice, @wat4r, @midorichoco, @raynerrold, @krak-jj, @tremendoushearttaco, @redfoxwritesstuff, @chibistar45, @kaylopolis, @cutiebimbo, @lousypotatoes, @rfox1998, @cosmic-lavender

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel fan fiction #alastor hazbin hotel #alastor x reader #alastor smut #hazbin hotel smut #slow burn #alastor slow burn #song fic #if i can't have love i want power #love and power #x reader #alastor the radio demon #the radio demon #alastor x reader slow burn

[catboybiologist]

Tangent on the optimism post I made earlier about societal doomerism.

Most of the waste in the Pacific Garbage Patch is industrial fishing and factory waste.

Industry, overseas shipping, unsustainable agriculture, and energy production, that could all easily be replaced by sustainable alternatives, all dramatically overshadow anything you produce with your personal "carbon footprint", which I'm sure you all know is a BS concept.

Nations and political forces that you have no voice in control your healthcare, or maybe whether your identity is legal.

War rages overseas. Or maybe over your own head. It's heartbreaking and terrifying and the progress we've made to stop it seems tiny in comparison.

All of this is true.

But have you ever done a creek cleanup, and seen that specific creek slowly come back to life?

Have you ever organized one tiny event for your local queer community?

Have you ever voted in a local election and seen one local regulation help establish queer safe havens, or medical aide, or help the homeless?

Have you seen an institution that you're part of quietly stop supporting one of these systems because of actions you played some tiny part in?

Because I have. All of that, and more. Tiny scraps of things getting better on a local scale. They do work.

Will they save the world? No.

Will they make things a bit brighter for the people around you? Yes.

And is it unfair that the world continues to get worse overall anyways? Yes. But there are tiny things you can make better bit by bit.

I'm not absolving capitalism or corporations or governments of blame here. In fact, like my last post, I'm enraged by them even more from this mentality. Because when you have something on a local scale that you can improve, and find joy in, and bring that joy to other people, then you have something that fires you up to fight against the larger systems that threaten it.

Never forget who the real enemies are. Never allow them to guilt you or make things "your fault" for existing. But you also can't let it destroy the ways you can improve your community. Giving up is what they want you to do.

[patchwork-crow-writes]

I just realised something about Rouxls Kaard that's... kinda blown my mind a little.

It always struck me as so odd, how confident he was that we wouldn't be able to beat his "puzzles" in Chapter 1. You know, the ones where you push a block one or two spaces onto a switch. He seems so sure that he has thwarted the Fun Gang, and is genuinely flabbergasted when it's solved in a matter of seconds. The whole thing's set up like a joke - haha, look at how stupid this poser looks, thinking he's outsmarted us with such a basic puzzle we've seen thousands of times before. Honestly, I didn't give it much thought afterwards, aside from the odd titter.

But then I learned about the concept of the Magic Circle - the contract entered into by a game and its player(s) that binds them to follow the rules of that game in order to participate, and ultimately win or lose. For this to work, a set of rules need to be agreed upon beforehand, whether that's by the game telling you what they are, the players coming up with their own, or memorising them through repetition and familiarity.

Now, us gamers have seen block-pushing puzzles like these hundreds, if not thousands of times before, so we already know what the premise of RK's puzzle is - push the block onto the switch. We don't even have to think about it for more than one second before we've fully understood the terms of the "game" we've engaged with him, and trounce it with minimal effort.

So guess what we also don't think about? The fact that Rouxls Kaard does not ever explain what the puzzle actually IS, much less what the rules of the puzzle are. And this is why he seems so damn smug about his "Ultimate" puzzles - because he assumes that we don't know what those rules are, and so will flounder around at a complete loss, and at his complete mercy.

(he also doesn't account for trial-and-error, apparently...?)

Now, this establishes something terrifying - Rouxls is under absolutely NO obligation to tell the participants of his puzzles what the rules of those puzzles actually are. And that's fine when you're dealing with something as rudimentary and ubiquitous as a block-pushing puzzle, but scale up the complexity even slightly and this self-aggrandising Duke of Puzzles could very well become an absolute menace. Which makes me a little concerned about his appearances in future chapters.

And if he ends up becoming a secret boss... then God help us all.

#rambling #deltarune #Rouxls Kaard #meta #theory #analysis

[hrts4scarr]

ᯓ ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 ⑅ walk him like a dog 2 ✯ jb22 .ᐟ.ᐟ

★ 𝐑𝐄𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐃﹕﹙ yes/no ﹚ — 𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘﹕﹙in which sebastian vettels sister gets her dream job to work along with him, but stumbles across an infamous playboy﹚ — 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒﹕﹙purpose use of lowercase letters only, not sure if there's gonna be another part, use of y/n, black-cat!reader, golden-retriever-ish!jenson, past-playboy!jenson, lowkey-past-toxic!jenson, VERYY light angst [i think], probably not well proofread, lmk if there's anything i missed!!﹚ — 𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆﹕﹙jenson button 22 x f!vettel!reader﹚ — 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓﹕﹙icba checking but it's not much at all imooo fjdkjfdsjfkla﹚ ★ 𝐓𝐄𝐀𝐌 𝐑𝐀𝐃𝐈𝐎﹕﹙part two who cheered !?﹚

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JENSON COULDN'T HELP BUT look at the red bull racer's sister eating her lunch with some of her co-workers. she fit right in and right away, even only after a week. she was smiling. oh, her smile. it was different than how she smiled with her brother. how jenson would do anything to make her smile that genuine smile she had with her brother.

"staring at my sister, huh?"

jenson whipped his head around to see sebastian vettel. he opens his mouth then closes it as he sees the fellow driver's raised eyebrows.

sebastian's cold face cracks into a grin. he throws his head back and laughs. "you should have seen the look on your face!"

jenson grumbles under his breath.

"alright, all jokes aside, please don't play with my sisters heart." sebastian puts a hand on jenson's shoulder.

"why would i ever-" jenson starts as he looks at him, but seb raises his eyebrows.

jenson purses his lips. "i.. alright, maybe you're right and i'm sorry."

seb sighs softly. "i'm just looking out for my sister, alright? i love her very much, with all my heart. i don't want to see it broken. i don't want to see *her* broken. just please, promise me."

"i promise." jenson nods sternly.

〜

days after days, you and jenson had formed a friendly and healthy relationship, in which you both hoped would never be ruined. every time you laughed or smiled, you didn't know the thoughts lingering behind the eyes that shined when you did so. you've opened up more and more, finally showing the fun side of you.

jenson hoped to keep it that way. he hoped that your friendship would never be ruined. he'd never felt this way before, and he didn't know whether you felt the same way or not. being the infamous playboy he was, of course he didn't want to break your heart like he did to the other girls. he made a promise to your brother, a promise he could and would never break. you were too dear to him, too precious. he didn't want to break you. he vowed to, with all his life and heart, and he would never admit that to anyone or to himself.

so from then on, he kept it a secret. a secret he couldn't bear. and little did he know, that you on the other hand, was starting to catch feelings too. and you would never admit that to yourself either.

you both had fallen too hard to ever want to break your relationship. your personalities might be polar opposites, but the way you both want to keep your loved ones close and protected was a trait you shared.

jenson, the infamous playboy he was known as, obviously had toyed with a 'few' girls hearts. he's not one to think before he acts. he's the outgoing, social golden retriever.

you were oftenly known is the black cat, and the studiouss quiet kid. you were known by everyone, but not exactly popular. you plan out your movements carefully, always one step ahead. perfect match, honestly.

but further more, jenson made you feel special. you wanted to deny that feeling that made you think, 'he probably gives this treatment to every girl.' but oh, how you were wrong.

he would never offer to carry an item that weighed less than a pound for the 'other' girls. ("here, let me help you with that." "jenson, i can carry it, it's fine!! it's literally just a-" "no, please just let me help." and of course you had to give in to those helpless eyes. that effect he had on you made you weak in the knees.) he would never buy the 'other' girls special and thoughtful gifts. ("please, darling, this is my treat." "but jens-" "i said it once and ill say it again. my. treat.") he would never follow those 'other' girls around like he did to you, like a dog on a leash. ("walk him like a dog." seb snorted. "shut up!!" you muttered, feeling your cheeks get slightly red. jenson rolled his eyes, continuing to follow you neverless.)

it was never those 'other' girls, who he never even talked to anymore ever since he had met you. it's always been you. and from then, it would never change.

★ 𝐓𝐄𝐀𝐌 𝐑𝐀𝐃𝐈𝐎﹕﹙i MIGHTTT take some blurb and part requests for this series, so ill lyk if i do!!﹚ ౨ৎ 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓﹕﹙@gray4youuu @c-losur3 @ujws5 @namgification @faithshouseofchaos @isurvived3-11andimproud @somebodyonce-toldme @44lewico﹚

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notes, comments, reblogs, feedback and follows are greatly appriciated!

!! PLEASE DO NOT REPOST ON OTHER WEBISTES/APPS OR COPY MY ORIGINAL WORK !!

#౨ৎ﹔💌 ┄ scar's works ! 🪽 #౨ৎ﹔🏎️ ┄ scar's works ! 🪽 #ᯓ 𐙚 walk him like a dog fic ˚⋆. #hrts4scarr #lvrzzscarr #formula 1 #formula 1 imagine #formula 1 fic #formula 1 fanfic #formula 1 x you #formula 1 smut #formula 1 x reader #formula 1 x y/n #formula one #formula one x y/n #formula one x reader #formula one x you #formula one imagine #f1blr #f1 #f1 imagine #f1 fic #f1 fanfic #f1 x reader #f1 edit #f1 x you #fanfic #f1 fluff #f1 fanfiction #f1 x female reader

[antianakin]

@theneutralmime

I assume you mean the Coruscant Guard and not the GAR as a whole. We do see Fox during the Fives arc responding directly to an order from Palpatine, but he's also IN PALPATINE'S OFFICE already because they're playing bodyguard in the moment. The GAR would be subordinate to Palpatine obviously, because he is the Chancellor of the Republic. Everybody is subordinate to Palpatine, that's kind-of how it works, it's just that most of the other clones seem to sort-of report more directly to a Jedi General or a civilian officer of some kind before they report to Palpatine.

So whether the CG reports directly to Palpatine or not is sort-of up to speculation as far as I can tell. It's possible that a reference book might have something more to say about it, but what we're shown in TCW isn't conclusive. There's never any indication that the CG have a Jedi General of any kind, so they presumably have to report to SOMEONE and most people just assume that this is Palpatine. It's just as possible though that there IS someone else they report more directly to normally, like Mas Amedda maybe or someone like Tarkin perhaps. The CG just aren't explored enough to really give any sort-of definitive answer as to who they report to directly. Palpatine is the ultimate authority so his orders would supersede anybody else's no matter who they came from.

As for Fox's personality, I have basically the same answer. He really isn't explored enough as a character to really say he has a "murderous" personality. He's in all of a few minor scenes across the entire show and he's always working and he never even has his helmet off, so figuring out his personality is a little difficult. Most of what people know his personality to be comes out of fanon, not canon. The closest I can think of to something he says that might give a hint as to his personality is when he tells Ahsoka that he understands why she'd kill Letta Turmond but that he still has to arrest her for doing it. It's not murderous by my interpretation, but it does show that he has empathy and is willing to treat Ahsoka with kindness despite what his duty requires him to do. He does help chase her down after she escapes from her cell and a bunch of his men seem to have died at her hand, but there doesn't seem to be anything particularly personal or vindictive about it, it just means he doesn't have the time or motivation to offer her the same empathy he did earlier.

So sure, he seems focused on work and pretty professional, but we also only ever get shown him WHILE WORKING, we never see him in any kind of downtime. And the one line that seems to showcase a little extra personality is actually intentionally empathetic towards someone he should see as a criminal. He doesn't have to extend that empathy to Ahsoka in the moment, but he does, and that seems to go forgotten quite a lot.

#star wars #clone troopers #coruscant guard #commander fox

[decolonize-the-left]

If Americans shouldn't vote for Biden what should they do instead? Vote for trump? Vote third party? Not vote?

(I know most people would probably ask you this in bad faith but I'm just really distraught at the state of politics and keep hearing people say "don't say he's the only option and don't support him" but there's never alternatives given and I don't know what an effective alternative could even be)

I think a good place to start that a lot of people are comfortable with is probably volunteering and petitioning for 3rd parties to make sure they Do have ballot access next year. So that ppl Can vote for someone else next year.

And yes, vote 3rd party this election. Or don't vote at all.

Besides that? Learn some basic defense and join protests. Support encampments and do things leftists say like join a union and organize your own community whether it be your schoolmates, coworkers, or all your friends and their friends.

Y'all see the news right?

Censorship and propaganda are rampant right now, along with transphobia and racism and even Nazis are back. Tensions are high to say the least and everyone is worked up about the election and Israel.

Figure out what you wish someone else would do and then do it. Is that de-arresting protesters? Organizing a bail fund, fighting cops and throwing tear gas back at them when they make things violent?

There's a lot to fight against and even more to fight for. Find what's worth fighting for (to you) and actually start fighting for it. Don't let cops or your principal or boss or anyone else stop you.

I think one of the most important things we can do right now is remind the government and those that serve the government that they won't take our rights so easily. That if they want to silence us then we're gonna make sure it'll hurt more than it'll help. That we can and will fight back.

And that's why it's so vital that we show them we won't settle either. We won't vote for Biden.

We settled for Clinton and look where that got us.

Does it feel like voting for more and more conservative blue candidates actually helped prevent harm? Or does it feel like you were manipulated and lied to?

Gonna be real, it feels like the government is a manipulative abuser and we're all it's gaslit victims who don't want to believe things are that bad just cuz he killed someone else instead of us.

Which is like...it doesn't mean good things for us that our government could do that and we'd rationalize it, you know?

How we want to get out of this fucked up dynamic is up to us. We work, we pay taxes, we listen to the governments rule of law, and still our government won't codify rights, our trans friends are being abused by the government, or it's banning apps with censorship. And the whole time it's telling us to shut up and be grateful it isn't worse.

Abusers never ever tell you that it could be better too. And they don't want you to know that. Cuz then you leave. And if you leave then they can't manipulate and abuse you.

So yeah. They'll shit on us for doing Anything that doesn't result in us staying, for doing anything that results in us choosing our own well being instead of theirs.

But that's what we need to do.

And you need support before you do that. That's what organizing is. It's like calling the besties who hype you up to leave your shitty ex. Except it's a bunch of people agreeing to support each other when they choose to stand up for something. Organizing is making sure there are people watching back and making sure if one of you is harmed or arrested that there'll be someone there to help bail you out.

The more people you have to bail you out, the less you have to worry about being outnumbered, spoken over, or physically stopped with force.

So yeah. Do that.

Organize. I hope I stressed that enough. The people on our front lines need us to be there for them as much we need Them to keep fighting for us.

Also since I'm here: make sure you and your friends don't talk shit about protesters even when they get violent and break shit. It's not abuse when the victim finally hits back at their abuser, it's self defense.

#asked #answered #idk #kinda just want politicians to start dying tbh

[odinsblog]

Elie Mystal covered the ridiculous, “Presidential Immunity” (aka, “Why Can’t Trump Be Treated Like A Dictator?”) case before SCOTUS

Dreeben: "BECAUSE THERE WEREN'T CRIMES!" (he didn't yell, I did, but he said "because there weren't crimes." )

Oh God, now Roberts wondering if they should send it back to the DC circuit because he's worried about presidents getting prosecuted in bad faith.

Roberts: "The court of appeals did not get into a focused consideration of what facts we're talking about or what documents we're talking about... they did not look at what courts usually look at when... taking away immunity."

Is this motherfucker serious? His argument is "Every president coups, why is mine getting charged?"

Thomas: Are you saying there's no immunity even for official acts?

And... that could be the ballgame

Roberts, Gorsuch, and Kavanaugh are more worried about a prosecutor going after a president for *political* reasons than A PRESIDENT TRYING TO OVERTHROW THE GOVERNMENT.

This is just about over.

And by "this" I mean the rule of law and by "over" I mean delayed indefinitely to help Trump.

Gorsuch suggesting that under the government's standard a president could be prosecuted for leading a "civil rights protest" in front of Congress and sought to "influence an official proceeding."

Yes, because Jan 6 and a fucking sit in are the same thing, Neil.

This is goddamn disgusting.

I'm going to keep listening because it is my literal job, but this is pretty much in the bag for Trump at this point. Remand to DC Circuit for decision on "official acts" and whether organizing a coup is one.

After November, if Trump loses, SCOTUS will return to the issue.

Alito: Are you really saying the president is subject to criminal laws like everybody else?

YES YOU DICK. THE PRESIDENT SHOULD BE SUBJECT TO THE LAWS LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE!

Alito: "I'm not talking about the particular facts of this case."

WHY? WHY THE HELL ARE NOT TALKING ABOUT THIS FUCKING CASE RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU?

The question I'd have for the SCOTUS now is: If you do this, why would a Republican president every peacefully transfer power again?

Democratic presidents will because Democrats follow rules that don't apply to the other side. But why would Republicans just leave *ever again*?

Alito: Couldn't FDR's decision to inter Japanese Americans during WWII be charged [as a crime]?

He says that LIKE THAT'S A BAD THING?

And Dreeben is trying to say that he couldn't.

This country, and specifically this court, is a fucking joke.

Now onto self-pardons. Alito is just playing all the Fox News hits now.

I'm going to smoke. Biden should send Seal Team 6 to Mar-a-Lago because according to Alito there's no downside.

Alito just suggested that the last election was "questionably decided"

I have left my body and am texting things I can't say aloud to my friends.

Kagan is like the first person to be asking about the actual criminal acts Trump is charged with.

I assume Alito is not listening because Kagan is a woman while Gorsuch is probably sitting there emailing the New York Times because they got something wrong on the Spelling Bee.

I see the internet is unimpressed with Dreeben but that's being a little unfair. The Republican justices want to do this, there's nothing that Dreeben could say to stop them.

What he *could* be doing was making their hypocrisy more clear for the non-legal media following along.

But... SCOTUS advocates have to preserve their ability to argue another day, and blowing up the justices in one case

A: Doesn't help them actually win the case.

B: Actively hurts them in the next one.

Kavanaugh: "Like Justice Gorsuch, I'm not concerned with the here and now of this case, I'm concerned about the future."

I don't know why this is acceptable. I do know that the justices are sure they are right about ignoring the facts of THIS ACTUAL CASE.

Kavanaugh... who WORKED FOR KEN STARR... is basically saying that Jack Smith is politically motivated and his appoint in unconstitutional.

It's... maddening. And most of the media reports will not even point out this hypocrisy.

The "independent counsel" law was rewritten into our current "special counsel" law BECAUSE of the shit Kavanaugh helped Starr do! Everybody was like "that crap can't happen again."

Somebody get @neal_katyal and @MonicaLewinsky on the phone to blow up this asshole.

@neal_katyal @MonicaLewinsky Every time I try to no have a stroke listening to this bullshit, they say something even more risible and stupid.

@neal_katyal @MonicaLewinsky Kavanaugh: "President Ford's pardon. Hugely unpopular when he did it... now probably looked on as one of his better decisions."

What? WHAT? WHO THE FUCK THINKS FORD'S PARDON OF NIXON WAS A GOOD IDEA? WHEN DID I DIE AND GO TO HELL????

@neal_katyal @MonicaLewinsky This could be a men v. women 5-4 ruling.

Men: Let's kick this back to DC to further delay Trump's trial.

Soto, Kagan, Jackson: Why? That's fucking dumb.

Barrett: Ladies, I agree with you, but we shouldn't call the men fucking dumb. We should politely disagree.

@neal_katyal @MonicaLewinsky We're past the two and half hour mark for an argument where the Republican justices made their decision when they were appointed, some of them decades ago.

@neal_katyal @MonicaLewinsky KBJ is closing by trying to answer all of Gorsuch's questions, which would be effective if Gorsuch operated in good faith. But... he doesn't. So...

@neal_katyal @MonicaLewinsky I had hoped that *one* of the liberal justices would have made the point from the Common Cause brief, highlighting that the whole point of what Republican justices are doing is to give Trump delay.

Not a persuasive argument for the justices, but good for the media to hear.

@neal_katyal @MonicaLewinsky The case is submitted. Court doesn't come back till May 9th which will be a decision day.

But I think they won't decide *this* case until July 3rd for max delay. And that decision will be 5-4 to remand the case back to DC, for additional delay.

@neal_katyal @MonicaLewinsky I wish I had better news for you. Thanks anyway for following along with our national descent into madness.

#politics #republicans #donald trump #scotus #elie mystal #presidential immunity

[ushiwaakas]

Heyyy , how’s your day?? I was wondering if you could do ushijima and reader at the gym, reader is new to exercising and doesn’t know how to use equipment so ushijima helps them

hiiiiii !!!!!!!! my day is going good, i hope yours is too!!!!

AND AHHHH THIS REQUEST IS SO CUTEEEE

my first request !!!! i’ll be doing gender neutral reader!!! thank you so much!

☘︎ you’ve known ushijima for a while now, i mean, who doesn’t? being his desk mate, especially, you see him. him doing his schoolwork, him watching volleyball clips, him in general…

☘︎ okay he is a sight HAHA

☘︎ he obviously works out, duh, come on have you seen him???????? ‘cause…YOU'VE HAVE!!!1!1

☘︎ but, anyways, ever since you two worked on a school project together, you’ve been getting closer and closer.

☘︎ as friends of course haha!!!

☘︎ today was like any other day, you come in class, he’s already sat down in his seat, getting whatever he needs ready for class he just has a pencil lmao

☘︎ “good morning !” you said, as you sat down. you gave him a tiny smile, before putting your bag down under your desk.

☘︎ “Good morning. How’s your day?” he turned to look at you,

☘︎ you tell him good, asking about his day as you took out your pencil case. other kids were coming into class. it’s your last class of the day, finally.

☘︎ “Good, thanks. I wanted to ask, my friend, Tendou, usually comes to the gym with me on Fridays, since we have no volleyball practice. But, he’s sick. Would you like to come?”

☘︎…

☘︎ AHHHHHHH

☘︎ you squeaked out a ‘yes’ and it was done. you’re going to the gym with the ushijima wakatoshi.

☘︎ it happened so fast, school ending, you racing home to put on gym clothes, and getting basic necessities. and bam! you’re standing next to him, walking inside. you didn’t know whether to thank god, or to beg him for strength at this moment.

☘︎ ushijima was in some shorts, gym shoes, and a TANK TOP AHHHHH

☘︎ he had toned muscles.

☘︎ “It’s hot out today. Let’s go inside.” he waited for you to walk next to him.

☘︎..it was a little embarrassing, following him around like a lost puppy.

☘︎ at that moment, you realized- you have no clue how to use a gym. you’ve never been to one, or working out in general.

☘︎ yep, you were asking for strength, hope, and forgiveness.

☘︎ “Which machine would you like to use first?” he said, turning to look at you.

☘︎ AH he spoke to you AHHH

☘︎ you were blanking, oh god oh god.

☘︎ “What are you looking to do? High reps at a low weight, or vice versa? Or cardio?”

☘︎ ohgodohgod.

☘︎ “…cardio…?” nice going…

☘︎ he nodded, walking over to the treadmills, cycling machines, and the stair stepper machines.

☘︎ “…would it be okay to say i’ve never stepped foot in a gym before?” just get it out he won’t judge hewon’tjudge.

☘︎ “Of course. I can explain for you, if you’d like, or help you use it.” he spoke, not a hint of annoyance on his face.

☘︎ the giddiness in your body was radiating.

☘︎ you nodded, thanking him, before he stepped onto the treadmill. you followed, going on the one next to him.

☘︎ there were a ton of buttons. you looked over to him, giving him a look that said ‘please help’.

☘︎ he quickly came to your rescue, turning to look right at you.

☘︎ “Treadmills help with cardio. Most have similar settings, and some may have controls to monitor your heart rate. Press this button here to turn it on, and I can help you set the speed. You can go at whatever pace you’d like.”

☘︎ back to thanking god.

☘︎ you smiled at him, as he leaned over to turn on the treadmill. it was at a low walking pace. he went back to his own treadmill, and he turned his on. he began to press the buttons.

☘︎ HE TURNED HIS UP TO A 12???

☘︎…he put you at a 3.

☘︎ you looked over to him. he had perfect posture, perfect form, and he looked really good.

☘︎ you slowly put yours up at a light jog, the corner of your eye looking at him.

☘︎ HE WAS ALREADY LOOKING AT YOU AHHHHHH

☘︎ “Are you okay?” he said, not even breaking a sweat.

☘︎ taken aback, you quickly nodded, smiling at him. he turned and went to look straight ahead.

☘︎ you stopped after a little while- and you were so embarrassed.

☘︎ you were hot, sweating, hands-on-hips-position, and drinking your water.

☘︎ he was not phased.

☘︎ “We can work on the kettlebells if you’re alright with that. I can help you again. Form is especially important.”

☘︎ hehehehehehehe he’s going to help with your fooooormmmmmm!!!!!

☘︎ he led you over to the kettlebells, and got out a 5 pound. he took two 25 pounds for him…

☘︎ “Let’s start easy. Form is important, so let’s start with swings. Swing the kettlebell between your legs, and make sure to tighten your midsection. Once the kettlebell reaches hip height, squeeze your glutes and extend your arms to the ceiling.”

☘︎ yeah that went in one ear and out the other… his voice was so deep.

☘︎ he saw your puzzled expression, “I can help straighten your back as you do so, guiding you through it, if that’s okay.”

☘︎ YESYES THATS OKAY.

☘︎ “of course, thank you!” you smiled.

☘︎ he came over, and handed you a 5 pound weight. he stood behind you, close.

☘︎ “Can I put my hands on your back?”

☘︎ as he got a quick answer, he did so, his left hand on your back, and the other on your shoulder, straightening your back.

☘︎ “Okay. Go ahead.”

☘︎ he led you through it, helping you with tips as he still had his hands on you. after a couple reps, you put the kettlebell down, before looking at him.

☘︎ he still had his hands on you

☘︎ “I apologize.” ushijima quietly said, as he took his hands off.

☘︎ he bit his cheek, and looked away for a moment, before looking back at you.

☘︎ “Would you like to learn how to spot someone?”

☘︎ he seemed at ease, a more happier expression, if you really looked

☘︎ this was going to be a long day, but you wouldn’t want to be with any other person besides him.

AHHHHHH OKAYOKAY i really hope this is good! i’ve never written any headcanons, drabbles, onceshots, etc before, so i hope this is good! i didn’t want this to be too long,…i might’ve overdid it a bit….sorry!!!!!

in the future, i want to get more of the character’s expressions and how they feel, compared the reader! i would love to work on that!

also i love ushijima so much i really hope i portrayed him well! he’s a little difficult to write for, but ill get the hang of it!

i hope everyone likes this, and thank you @jellysupremacy for the request! i hope you like it!!! i had a good time writing it!!!! 💗💗💗💐💐

i wrote like crazy i think i did it in an hour this was so fun

#ushijima x reader #ushjima wakatoshi #ushijima wakatoshi headcannons #ushijima wakatoshi x reader #ushijima fluff #haikyuu writing #haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu drabbles #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu #iloveushiwaka #ushiwaakas

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

hi! I have a question about sexual health clinics - long story short I have a pretty strong fishy smell coming from my vagina so I'm planning on visiting the sexual health clinic at my college. I'm nervous though, and while you obviously couldn't know exactly what procedure is at my local clinic, I was wondering what general things should happen at an appointment? What sort of questions will I be asked? Do I have to show someone my vagina? Will they believe that I'm not sexually active? (true fact but doctors are ALWAYS sceptical when I say this)

hi anon,

you're right that this will vary from one location to another. if you're having a health issue with your vagina then your healthcare provider will likely be asking questions about your sexual history; whether or not they believe your answers isn't something that I can answer, although a good healthcare provider should, of course, listen to their patients. there's a good chance they'll want to perform an exam and possibly take samples, which is something to be aware of and prepare for but also something that you can call ahead and ask about.

you can also call ahead to the clinic and ask if there's information about what you can expect if you come in with a likely case of bacterial vaginosis (the most typical cause of the fishy odor you're describing) and request further information about what kind of treatment you can expect from your visit. knowing what to expect in advance can be a huge help!

if it does come to a vaginal exam and you're feeling nervous, that's totally normal! very few people enjoy vaginal exams, but it's totally possible to get through them with minimal pain. my best advice is to come in prepared for a little pain if you're not accustomed to vaginal penetration and have a really honest chat with the person performing your examination about your expectations. when I get my pap smears done, I always open by telling the gyno that vaginal penetration isn't super easy for me and that I may need to swear through the exam and take breaks if it gets overwhelming. every examiner I've ever had has been totally understanding and down to work with me on that; communicating can help so so much.

I hope everything goes well and you get the treatment you need!

#sex edventures 2024

[secretswiftymarvelfan]

Hi!

I was at the pool this evening and it got me thinking…who most likely worked as a lifeguard during the summer: Ari, Colin or Jake? 💦

Have fun!

💜 M

Oooh this is a tough one! My mind actually went straight to Johnny for some reason and out of those three I can easily all of them being lifeguards 😂

Like Colin would definitely do it at a posh summer club to scope out the hot girls, and I can totally Jake doing it for the same reason but ends up just befriending all the kids and even teaching them to swim on his spare time 🥰

And Ari…. Oh Ari….

How to Save a Life - Lifeguard!Ari x Reader

Word Count: 475

Warnings: Fluff! Sexual Tension! Shirtless Ari!

Dividers by @firefly-graphics

Masterlist

Every year you spent your summer at the local county club your parents had memberships to. You never really enjoyed going, the clientele was not your crowd. However, you did enjoy just reading by the pool and getting some peace and quiet.

One summer though you found yourself wanting to go to the club every day, not because of the peace and quiet but because of the new lifeguard. You’d heard through whispers that he called was Ari and was a Junior at College like you. He was easily the hottest guy you’d ever met with his thick shoulder length heard and beard. 

You tried to focus on your book but often found yourself distracted, biting your lower lip as you watched him shirtlessly survey the pool. He had all the attention from all the girls so you knew it was unlikely that you’d ever catch his attention so you stuck to your book, imagining him instead of the male protagonist. 

It all changed one day when you were sipping on your fruity cocktail when the sun was suddenly blocked. 

You lifted your sunglasses, surprised to find Ari stood over you, his hands on your hips “Can I help you?” you asked.

A smile tugged at the corner of his lips “Just wanted to check that you weren’t planning on swimming after drinking that” he said pointing to your half-finished cocktail.

You tilted your head at his question, you’d never seen him ask anyone else that question before. What if this was just some excuse to come talk to you? You decided to test that theory and play a little.

“Maybe,” you said with a cheeky shrug of your shoulder. 

“That can be very dangerous you know… I’d hate for something to happen to you” he smirked.

You bit your lip and smiled up at him “It’s a good thing there’s a lifeguard on duty then, I think I’d like being saved by him” 

The lopsided smile on his face grew and he crouched down, grabbed the napkin on the table beside you and a pen “Well I’m actually about to clock off, but if you want to go swimming another time…” he said as he scribbled on the napkin “call me and I’ll make sure you’re safe” he passed you the napkin which had his number written on it. 

“And if I wanna do something other than swimming?” you asked arching a brow. 

Ari wet his lips, his eyes growing dark as he gave you a lopsided grin “You can call me for anything” he winked. 

You smiled back up at him as he stood back up, his hand resting on your thigh as he did you. His touch lingered like a brand as you watched him walk away, grinning to yourself wondering whether it would be too soon to call him this evening.

Sharing is caring so please reblog if you enjoyed this and maybe even leave a comment to make my day!

Masterlist

I don’t have a taglist so follow @secretswiftymarvelfanlibrary​ and turn on post notifications to be kept up to date!

#Niamh Writes #Ari Levinson #Lifeguard!Ari #Ari Levinson x Reader #Ari Levison x you #Ari Levinson X Y/N

[froggywritesstuff]

abed's rom-com | abed nadir

pairing: Abed Nadir x g/n!reader

fandom: Community

request: @lilfartbox1 (i am so sorry for the wait 😭) : please any abed nadir comfort / fluff pieces like theres a little angst of them miscommunicating their feelings for eachother and then find out theyve both been doing the same thing of trying to make the other jealous etc

content warnings: not proofread, fluff, angst if you squint extremely hard

word count: 910

A/N: yikes this is rushed but i recently started watching community again and this had been in my drafts for too long so i wanted to finish it

Abed knew he wasn't the best at dealing with his emotions, often turning to his favourite sitcoms and movies for help. Especially when it came to romance. He hadn't had as much experience with it as he would've liked, so when he realised he started liking you in a romantic way, he quickly became panicked. You were part of the study group, meaning if he started liking you it could potentially ruin the dynamic of the friendship. But when Annie told him you felt the same way about him, he knew exactly what to do. Except he didn't. It wasn't working the way he had planned. He'd been reenacting an age old trope; person a makes person b so jealous that they eventually confess their feelings for person a. He started off small, making sure you'd see him catching glances at some random student in the cafeteria, and zoning out as if he'd been thinking about someone else. That was half true. To make it realistic, he'd always think about you when he pretended to zone out. When someone - normally Annie, who Abed told all about his plan - would catch him staring at someone and begin to tease him about it, he noticed how quiet you would get, how you wouldn't engage in any other conversations and would even leave because you were 'late for something else'. He didn't like it. The last thing he wanted was to know he made you upset. But no one in the movies ever stopped their plan halfway. As much as he wanted to, he didn't stop his plan.

He suspected that his plan was working when you started doing the same thing he did and made him jealous. It was either that, or his plan had backfired and you thought he didn't like you so you moved on. Either way, he still felt insanely jealous of whoever you began to like- whether they were real or not. He needed you to confess to him soon. Very soon. Being so jealous as well as not being sure if he had any reason to be jealous was driving him insane, he couldn't even focus on studying. Not that much studying was happening though.

"Abed, is everything ok?" he barely even registered the question, and was not able to recognize who's voice that was.

"What?" he mumbled back, his mind still elsewhere as he spoke with the group.

"We asked if you were ok." Annie began speaking, "You seem kind of out of it today."

Troy nodded, "Yeah, you and Y/N." Abed's head perked up at the sound of your name, suddenly giving Troy his full attention, "Neither of you have laughed at anything I've said today." he said, looking quite sad.

Abed looked over to where you were sitting, the two of you meeting eyes. You looked at each other for a moment, before announcing to the group you had to leave, not knowing that Abed was following behind you. You stood in one of the more secluded halls, startled when you saw Abed next to you.

"Shit, you scared me." 

"Sorry," he said, making less eye contact than usual, "I wanted to tell you something."

You nodded, signalling for him to go on.

"I like you, Y/N." he was quick with his confession, after hiding his feelings for long he wanted to get straight to the point, "I know you like someone else, but I need you to know how I felt." as he spoke, the situation became more and more real to him. No matter how cliche the plot between the two of you was, it wasn't a cheesy rom-com movie. It was real life. And in real life, there wasn't a guaranteed requited love story. There was a chance you could reject Abed's feelings, and his friendship with you would be ruined. "I'm sorry if this makes things awkward between us," he said, a frown taking place on his lips, "You're one of my closest friends, but I couldn't keep this from you, that wouldn't be fair to you."

You watched and listened to his confession intently, seeing how genuine his expression and words were. He wasn't playing a character, or just reenacting a scene - no matter how much his confession sounded like it was taken straight out of a rom-com - it was real.

"Abed," you began, "There's no other person. I made that up." you explained, though a part of you figured that he guessed that already, "I only acted like I liked someone else because I thought you liked someone else."

He couldn't help the smile forming on his lips, "I made that up too,"

His smile was contagious, as you quickly felt your lips turning upwards into a smile as you laughed softly, "You should start making romance movies."

"I have no interest in doing that. I could but I don't think I'd find it very enjoyable." he paused, "But I appreciate the sentiment."

"Speaking of movies, would you wanna see a movie with me sometime?"

"I would like that. We can look at session times together when we're finished studying. We should also get back to the library."

You nodded, unable to stop the smile growing on your lips as you asked, "Do you wanna hold hands when we walk back or...?"

He smiled softly and held out his hand for you to hold, "I would like that."

"Cool." you took his hand.

"Cool cool cool."

#fanfiction #abed nadir #abed nadir x reader #abed nadir x gender neutral reader #community #danny pudi #x reader #gender neutral reader #abed nadir x y/n #abed nadir x you #fluff #froggywritesstuff

[storiesbyjes2g]

3.109 My place in this world

Mama called and invited us over for dinner that night, so Sophia and I discussed whether we would share our news when she inevitably asked us about her grandchildren. We knew she could handle it, and would offer to help any way she could, but we decided to keep it to ourselves for the moment. I didn't enjoy keeping secrets from my mother, but letting the world in felt like defeat at this stage. Sophia had only just begun the treatments. She could be pregnant by tomorrow. It wasn't time to worry everyone, especially when they weren't suspicious yet.

But to both of our surprise, we got through the entire evening without one question or comment about babies. Not even Alessia, who was even nosier, said anything. Without a story to fabricate, we ate in a semblance of peace with our secret between us, hoping one day this would be a distant memory added as a footnote in our story.

Back at home, I caught Sophia sneaking out of the bathroom as I headed for bed. She froze like she got caught stealing when she spotted me, but then the disappointed took over. I sighed, not because I knew what she did in there, but because of her tenacity. I loved how she wouldn't give up despite how much it hurt. But I didn't want her to end every day disappointed if these treatments didn't work, so I grabbed her by the hand and led her into our room.

"It's okay, you know. Maybe it takes a while for it to take effect."

"Or maybe it won't work for me."

"Don't say that. It'll work. And even if it doesn't, it's not the end. We'll just move on to the next thing. Regardless of how it happens, very soon, we'll have our baby, and we'll be in our new house, and everything will be great."

She sighed, nodding in agreement, but I could tell she struggled to believe.

"Is it bad that I hope we don't have to adopt? Does that make me like my parents?"

"Not at all. I think everyone prefers their own blood. It's natural."

"It's just that... You have all these beautiful family ties. There's only me. I don't want my existence to be just a blip on the radar, here one day and gone the next, forgotten and unimportant. I want to leave a piece of me behind so my life matters!"

I couldn't hold it together anymore. The dam broke, and tears flooded my face. I hated how much those idiots who birthed and raised her affected her life. She arguably was the best sim to ever walk the earth; The star in my sky; The light in my darkness; The gummy bear in my pancakes! No one else mattered to me quite like she did.

"Sophia, you do matter! You matter to me! You matter to this family! My life has been a thousand times better because you're in it! And when we're finally able to hold our child, whether it's ours or not, you'll matter to him too! Her. Whoever! You're gonna love the hell out of them, and they'll think you're the best sim on earth. Right?"

She nodded through her tears.

"Yes. I love it so much already! I haven't even met it yet."

"Exactly. Don't worry. It'll happen."

#ISBI challenge #sims 4 story #sims 4 gameplay #adolting #adolting gen 3 #luca winston murillo #sophia aguilar #emerald pope #alessia amina murillo #tw: infertility

[sheepalmighty]

Some more of that Chai joins Vandelay for half a day AU. Or just a picture of a kinda OOC Kale chilling if you wanna gloss over those comics. I'm still not sure if the colours are too garish or not.

These were mostly done with the premise of treating Kale's office like the hideout. I also really like how mundane, or familiar, the interactions between Chai and Kale can be in the game so I wanted to draw some stuff exploring more like that. But also, there's the ulterior motive of shipping so I included an out of context scene because I can't bother drawing the rest of it (though it seems like a huge jump in their relationship as a result. I think they're so big headed that they get stuck in a feedback loop of stroking the other's ego if an excuse comes up to do so)

#hi-fi rush #hi fi rush #hfr #kale x chai #kale vandelay #hi fi rush chai #hi fi rush korsica #i didnt spend any time finding a ref for kale's shoe sole so i made something up #besides that though i owe my life to all the uploaders of reference pics and interesting details in the game #sorry about the korsica comic i probably had no choice but to cram all those words into one panel. also i like the typo on that webpage #i gave myself an arbitrary deadline of the end of last month but found the pages to be too messy so i spent an extra week on them #whether that helped or not no one will ever know. i have to work on other things so im putting a hard cutoff now #i wonder if my want to draw perspective stuff freehand is a case of fearing what my limits may be or if its just a fear of the line tool #i adore that this game lets you add more to the music through your inputs (dashing on the beat etc) #just like the games i have thoroughly enjoyed from tetsuya mizuguchi #i seem to have too much time on my hands #thinking up scenarios is quick and easy to do while carrying on with the day to day #its when the brain decides you need to try to draw them that the problems occur #'tis mine

[ghostiboos]

#aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa #remember when I got to listen to music? or watch things? or read things? or- #every month of every year it gets worse and i always tough it out and tell myself it’ll get better ‘soon’ but it’s been years #it’s been fucking years #im not even conscious for my own ‘existence’ anymore #at least i had some agency in my oppression before but now i have to commit myself to it just to stay alive and i see no end in sight #i’ve had to give up listening to music multiple years. fucking m u s i c . #i used to have music and books and manga and movies and shows and writing and drawing and editing to feel even the slightest bit alive #but every year things only ever get busier even when I can’t imagine things being any busier and year after year one by one i’ve had to drop #each and every thing that gives me life and i just cant take it anymore i cant fucking take it anymore #and i know im working this hard to secure a path o u t of my family situation so I can at least have one less thing to worry about but #but when everything always only gets worse year after year ‘even when surely i cant possibly get more worn down than this’ i just #how am i even supposed to hope that things could possibly get better when every year that hope proves to have been in vain? #im so tired… #and i can’t help but hold onto just a little bit of hope that things will turn up as soon as this happens or that #but im scared I can’t hold out much longer #i hate money… i hate that it literally dictates whether I live or die… #and i hate that having it is so dependent on who you’re related to and whether they like you… #what’s a queer to do //jester hat jingles softly as i sigh in profound melancholy #free time #let me in #homegrown memes #family #work #working class #lgbtqiia+ #tag rambles

[queencvbra]

Thinking about how isolated Tory was even inside of c.obra k.ai itself after the shift into Kreese and Silver’s leadership. With Hawk and Miguel leaving, she didn’t really have any friends until Robby joined. She had other “allies”, yes, but nothing beyond the surface level of dojo loyalty. And something that contributed a lot to her isolation was the change in ck as a whole. Before, it was comprised of a bunch of outcast kids trying to find some form of empowerment, and that’s what drew Tory there. That’s where she fit the best; she was also an outcast trying to find her own sense of worth and community. Somewhere she belonged. But then Kreese and Silver overhaul the whole damn thing and most of the outcasts are replaced with these privileged rich kids because of their athletic capabilities and willingness to conform to whatever their senseis want. It stops being about empowering those who need it and about the strength of an establishment.

And Tory didn’t fit in well with the new crowd. The first thing we see of her in s4? She is ALONE. Everyone else arrived together. She was by herself. They ignored her when they came in. Tory only matters to them when she approaches them, and even then, it’s in conflict. They represent the opposite of what she thought was great about ck and everything she didn’t want to become, yet there she was, and she was supposed to be one of them. Everyone on the outside thought she was one of them anyway, so what would it matter if she fought against the change? She wouldn’t be welcome outside of ck because of the things she’d done and the bridges she’d burned, but here she still had the choice to try and fit in. Do what her sensei tells her and conform, because that meant she could survive. It meant she had a chance. And yet, she never really could become one of them, could she? She couldn’t become another Kyler or even a Piper (who you can argue was just willfully ignorant instead of actively malicious like Kyler). There was never a moment in this new ck where Tory WASN’T torn between who she wanted to be and who she needed to be to survive in this environment. The only reason she wasn’t completely alone was because she had Robby (and later Kenny but only bc of that association with Robby tbh), and also Kreese, but there were plenty of times when it was questionable whether or not Kreese really had Tory’s back or if he was putting ck’s interests first.

#I am full of THOUGHTS #the fact that she only ever had one person who had her back without question during her whole stint in ck #yeah kreese had her back too a lot of times but the thing is #he also manipulated her #whether actively or unconsciously. he might not believe it was manipulation bc of his conviction in what he does but psychologically it was. #there were plenty of times when he put the interests of ck above tory's wellbeing #prime example of that is when he worked her up in s3 and got her to go lash out against md/ef #you cannot tell me he wasn't doing that on purpose in that scene. he knew what he was doing by telling her that shit in a very specific way. #he didn't have to tell her to go break in. he knew her well enough to know that she would do something. and he'd be blameless. #it didn't matter what came next as long as tory did *something*. anything to keep that separation and intimidate md/ef #kreese fought for tory and kreese emotionally manipulated tory are statements that are both true and not mutually exclusive #and I think that makes him telling her to fight her own way and reject ck's no mercy mentality at the tournament more impactful #because up until that point it was always ck first. even when helping tory. ck still came first. #but in that moment it was *tory* who he put first above ck. a BIG turnaround. #this is why I have so many complicated thoughts about her and papa john #bc he did right by her in the end but also that can't erase what came before and his intentions through indoctrinating her #do I think kreese genuinely cared about tory? yes. #do I also think he's a fucked up old guy with a lot of internalized shit who doesn't know how to separate his care from #his distorted world view and his ongoing manipulation of others? under the belief that he just wants what's best for his students? also yes. #I just love that dynamic it's so complex #and a lot to unpack for what it means for tory from the perspective of writing her #⚡ 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 ── ❝ She was made of lightning. ❞