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total-drama-takes-takes-2 · 9 months

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tta episode 5

“Last time on Total Takes Action: The teams formed their very own mobs to sell the now-contraband Chef Hatchet's Total Drama Yum Yum Happy Go Time Candy Fish Tails. The Fujoshis, despite a strong lead from Michela, lost after Bonnie ratted the team out, sending them to the Lame-o-Sine- but not without a special goodbye from their “friend” Caesar. Will the Anons keep their lead? Has anyone gotten Michela out of those cuffs yet? Find out now, on Total! Takes! Action!”

A black screen. Nothingness.

Then, light.

Caesar picks up the phone and holds the camera to the mirror, using the flash to do his hair in the dark. The bathroom door opens and Joner walks in, pausing to look up at the ceiling.

“What happened to the lights?”

“They’re out again,” Caesar sighs. “I swear, I’m draining the life out of this thing just from doing my hair!”

“Where’d you even get that?” Sha-Mod asks from a stall.

Caesar shrugs. “Found it just lying around. I’ve been using it to collect information in case I want to sue later. I have very good lawyers,”

Joner nods and whistles as he pulls a toothbrush out of his back pocket, half of his body out of the view from the camera, and wets it under the tap. There’s a heavy silence over the room. The bags under Caesar’s eyes are dark purple.

The sound of a toilet flushing and Sha-Mod slamming the stall door follows and he walks in the background before reaching a sink off-screen.

“Hey,” he says. Caesar looks over. “Sorry about Bonnie, man. It’s not easy.”

Caesar sighs and sets the phone down on the counter, shrouding the screen in darkness again. The audio continues to play without hitch. “It’s not easy. I wish it was,”

“When McLovin got voted off, I didn’t know what that meant for any of us,”

“Well, at least you still have Joner,”

Joner agrees through a mouthful of toothpaste.

“I only had Bonnie,”

The sound of the door opening follows as someone new enters. “Hey, guys, we’re all meeting outside. We can’t find Chris,”

---

“I knew it was getting too quiet around here!” Scary says. She sounds mad, though the camera is obscured by a curtain of blue- Caesar’s pocket.

“He probably just left to do something without telling us. Where’s Chef?” Michela asks.

“Can’t find him either,” O sounds nervous. “No one panic, though, okay? Take deep breaths- everyone count to ten-”

“Oh, can it!” Scary snaps. “This is a challenge, obviously. You are all so juvenile.”

“How do you know?!” Scruffy says, panicking.

The sound of footsteps. “The gate is locked. It looks like the lot is closed down,” Peter says. “We got evicted.”

Fren clears his throat. “Um… it definitely wasn’t an eviction notice,”

---

“Oh… oh, this is not good,” O mutters.

Caesar pulls the camera out of his blazer pocket and begins collecting evidence on the scene. Just inside the gates is a police-taped crime scene, complete with a chalk outline of a mangled body in the middle. Various red stains cover every surface.

Caesar swallows. “Okay, from now on, this camera stays on,”

Scary ducks under the police tape and walks up to the stain-covered chalk outline.

“What are you doing!” Peter asks. “This is a crime scene!”

“Oh, please,” they swipe some of the red liquid off the asphalt and lick it off their finger. Everyone gags. “It’s cornstarch and food coloring.”

“Nuh-uh,” O shakes his head. “I’m not playing these games. I’m going back to the trailer and waiting for someone to get us. It’s like my therapist always says-”

Everyone groans.

"Someone's gonna get him alright," Michela mumbles, wiping some dust off her parka. "If this is a challenge, it must be crime themed."

"But we already had the mobster episode?" Joner asks cautiously. She glares at him for having the audacity to address her.

"There are different subgenres of crime,"

"As much as I hate to admit any of you resemble even the smallest fraction of intelligence, you're likely right," Scary crosses their arms. "Nonetheless, I'm not doing anything until Chris addresses us himself."

And with that, the group disperses.

---

Caesar records the sunset over the city and turns back to the craft services tent, where Michela is trying to open a can of beans with a shank. “Stupid kitchen… I cannot BELIEVE they took the can openers,”

“The sunset is pretty tonight,” Caesar says merrily.

Peter looks up from the table, where he’s closely seated between Michela and Fren. “Is it?”

Caesar nods, shaking the camera a bit. “Very. And there’s no need to worry, we’ll be fine as long as we stick together, right? They can’t just leave a bunch of teens here,”

“Oh, they can,” Scruffy mumbles from the other table, scratching at a bug bite erratically. “They’ve done it before- but, oh, wait, this isn’t before! This is all new!”

They laugh insanely and Joner and Sha-Mod look between each other uncomfortably. Scary stands. "You people are unbearable. I'm going for a walk,"

Just before they can formally excuse themselves, a scream from the trailer catches everyone’s attention and the group runs outside over the dark set.

Caesar throws open the trailer door first. “O? O?” But there’s no one there.

Fren mutters. “Uh-oh,” just as all the lights in camp go out. The screen goes dark.

A few people scream. Scary laughs. “Oh, God. This is so corny,”

“Hold on, I have a night vision setting on this thing,” Caesar mutters. Suddenly, the vision in the camera returns, everything shrouded in green.

“Is this really the time to be recording?” Fren asks. “I mean, we’re all on camera anyway.”

“This is for my... personal records, thank you,”

---

The group walks alongside each other back to the craft services tent. Joner walks on one side of Caesar, Michela on the other. They’re very clearly ignoring each other.

Caesar sighs. “I miss Bonbon,”

Michela gives him a sympathetic look. “Yeah, I get the feeling. I miss Max, too,”

“They’d both love this kind of thing, huh?”

Joner watches the interaction nervously, looking between the two and Sha-Mod. He stares at Michela for a few moments, working up the courage to say something, but then turns to Sha-Mod again with a sigh.

“Sha-Mod, I- hey, wait… Sha-Mod?” he looks around. “Sha-Mod?”

“What happened?” Michela asks cautiously.

“He was right here!” Joner squeals, hurrying closer to the group.

The group enters the craft services tent and Michela takes a headcount.

“Okay, we’re just missing O and Sha-Mod. Everyone else is accounted for,” she taps her chin. “This doesn't feel like a crime flick. It must be a horror movie challenge, like last season’s.”

Caesar sighs loudly. “Bonnie…”

Michela ignores him. “Which means we need to stick together to avoid getting picked off. Maybe we should work by the buddy system to make sure no one’s alone,”

Scary rolls her eyes but doesn’t protest. “I call Scruffy,”

“Oh, thank God!” They whimper, clinging to her leg. “B-but at least if this is like last season’s… I’ll know what to do, right?”

Scary pats their head. “Sure thing, champ!”

Fren and Peter link arms, the latter shaking slightly, and Caesar coughs awkwardly. “Well… I have the phone…”

“You’re not seriously comparing your phone to a person?” Michela blinks. He shrugs. “I can’t partner up without Bonnie. It’s not right.”

She sighs and turns to Joner. “Okay, fine. Just don’t talk too much,”

---

The hours tick by. It’s now far after dark, nearing midnight. Scary yawns and stands, then begins walking to the tent flap.

“Um, where are you going?” Caesar asks, holding the phone up to them as they leave.

“To bed, numbskull. I’m tired,”

“Haven’t you ever seen a horror movie? You’re gonna get beaten to death in a sleeping bag,” Michela says, rubbing her eyes.

Fren nods. “We agreed on keeping watch in here,”

“Oh, whatever, you big babies. This is just Chris trying to creep you out, and it’s pathetically working. I have some physics to catch up on,” she walks out into the dark. Scruffy sighs and gets up to follow her.

“Whatever,” Michela sighs, cradling her head in her hands. Fren pats her back reassuringly.

---

A few more hours go by. Fren is sleeping, slumped over the table. Peter is rocking back and forth at his feet, and Michela is blinking slowly.

The phone rests in Caesar’s lap as he snoozes, giving a skewed shot of the table from across the way. Every time he breathes, the camera slowly moves up, then down as he exhales.

“Hey, don’t fall asleep yet,” Joner nudges Michela’s shoulder. “Remember that one sleepover we had where we pulled an all-nighter?”

She rubs her eyes. “We were twelve,”

“Yeah, but still. We made that pact that whoever passed out first had to take out my mom’s trash the next morning, so we both stayed up and made my little brother do it,” he laughs. “I miss that,” he smiles at her. “I miss us.”

Michela frowns and looks away. “Things are different now,”

“Come on, Miccy. What do I have to do to make it up to you?”

She sighs and rolls her eyes. “I dunno, why don’t you plan out some huge cheesy gesture to win me over, like in the movies,”

Joner nods in thought as Caesar suddenly wakes with a start, the phone falling off of his lap and onto the grass. He picks it up seconds later and holds it to his face, breathing on the camera and cleaning the lens with his sleeve before turning it back around. “Everyone still here?”

“We heard Scruffy screaming about a half hour ago but nothing else,” Michela leans on the table. “Fren, do you still have to go to the bathroom?”

She nudges him awake. He blinks slowly and nods.

“Okay. Joner, you’re up with me. Let’s go. And stay together,”

The three stand and head out. As they leave the tent, Michela stops them. “What are those?”

Surrounding the tent are dozens of oddly woven branches and piles of rocks. Most of the weaving is shaped like Chris.

“Symbols!” Joner quivers, hiding behind Michela.

Michela sighs and continues leading the two out to the bathrooms, avoiding knocking over any of the ornaments.

---

Caesar sits in the craft services tent, propping up the phone against a box of napkins and pointing it at himself.

“This is Caesar. Video diary #13,” he folds his hands in his lap. “I’ve been telling everyone I’m collecting evidence, but I just need an outlet. Without Bonnie here, with nothing to do… I feel like I’ve been relying far too much on Bonbon,” he looks down. “I’ve been a burden. I’m useless here. I’m just not built for this show! I’m a host! I-I’m a host! And there’s no shame in that!”

He sighs.

"I just wish I could've done better for Bonnie. I don't know if what we have is platonic or... whatever. But I'd like to figure that out together,"

Peter stirs from under the table and Caesar quickly grabs the camera, flipping it back around. Peter rubs his eyes as he sits up, looking around like he can’t remember where he is.

“Caesar?” he looks around. “Did everyone else get snatched?”

“Nah, Michela and Joner took Fren to the bathroom… wait, they’ve been gone for like, forty minutes now,” he checks the time on the phone. "Weird."

The tent suddenly begins shaking violently, large shadows on either side casting a menacing frame over the two. Peter jumps and scrambles outside into the dark.

"Peter, wait!" Caesar says, but he disappears. Caesar hugs his knees to his chest and trembles as a dark figure re-enters the tent.

"P-Peter?" he asks, voice shaking.

The figure hurries over, face red and wheezing.

"Joner! What the-"

"Michela and Fren-" he pants. "Dark figures- serial killers- witches!"

Caesar stands. "Okay, that's it!"

Joner collapses to the grass and lies on the ground face-first before looking up as Caesar leaves. "Where are you going?"

"I'm gonna win this dumb challenge!"

---

Joner jogs to catch up with Caesar as he storms ahead.

"This is suicide, dude! You're gonna get snatched!"

He shakes his head. "I can't think about that now. I'm going to win, I'm going to be the last one standing!"

Joner sighs, his shoulders hanging. "You deserve it, man. You're a better dude than I am,"

"Oh?" Caesar raises an eyebrow, his gossipy tendencies getting the better of him. "Why's that?"

"You're a great friend to Bonnie. You two always have each other's backs and stuff, and I..." he sighs, rubbing his shoulder. "I really let down Miccy. We'll never be friends again."

Caesar slows his walk, thinking aloud. "Bonnie and I aren't perfect. We have our own problems, too... is making it up to Michela what you really want?"

Joner nods, kicking a rock across the grass. "Don't feel bad for me, bro. Even if I did win, there's no way she'll ever forgive me,"

Caesar sighs.

---

"This is Caesar. Video diary #14. I just remember feeling so bad for the little guy. Bonnie and I... our story is just beginning. And I want to find out where that goes together. If Bonnie hated me and we got separated for another four weeks? I don't think I could live with myself,"

---

Joner and Caesar approach the communal bathrooms, their footsteps seeming to echo. The camera swings around to Joner, who blinks, and then back to the door.

Caesar walks in first, and the camera takes a moment to adjust. Fren is standing in the corner of the bathroom, facing the wall, completely still.

“Fren…?” Joner asks.

Something offscreen lunges at the two and they both shriek. The camera cuts to and from black before landing in an odd angle on the floor, giving a skewed shot of Caesar tackling a black-robed figure and attacking it on the ground.

The phone tips over. Black. Caesar screaming. Joner picks up the camera and starts running in the opposite direction as Caesar shrieks "MY HAIR!"

The lights in camp suddenly flash on, and the screen goes white.

---

“Well… that was fun,” Chris chuckles, standing at the podium in the amphitheater. “I hope all of you enjoyed playing that as much as I like watching it.” He chuckles, holding up Caesar’s phone. “Teens today are too easy- you give them a phone and they do your job for you!”

Everyone crosses their arms and glares at Caesar. He smiles nervously.

“Ultimately, the Anons took the win again, but that doesn’t mean all hope is lost for you. In fact… Joner came up with a pretty sweet idea for me earlier,” he grins wickedly. The campers stare at him, confused. “But nevermind that. Let’s get this started! Michela, you’re safe.”

“Peter,”

“Fren,”

“O- you were the first out- and Caesar- your spelled doom for your team,” Chris holds up the last Gilded Chris Award. “O…

… You’re safe. Caesar- sorry, dude.”

Caesar mumbles to himself and stands passively, almost pleasantly.

---

CAESAR: “I’m not even mad. Let’s be real- if I wanted to win, I would! But I wasn’t born to play, I was born to lead. I’m a host at heart. Now it's time to find out what this "Aftermath" thing is all about,”

---

“Who will be taking the carpet of shame next time? And who will make it one step closer to the million? Find out next time, on Total! Takes! Action!”

#tta #total takes action

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edorazzi · 2 years

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Well THIS has been a long time coming. Today we’re reviewing Part 2 of the Miraculous Season 4 finale; aka “Strike Back”, aka more of the Felix arc. Sorry for the delay guys, I was just living in fear! ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

Previous episode reviews: “Felix” | “Gabriel Agreste” | “Risk”

Like previous reviews this is gonna get pretty long, so I’ll throw the rest under a cut and let’s get started once again! ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿

So here we are again. Literally everything delayed me from getting to this episode: catching Covid, Internet issues, IRL obligations, a general sense of doom. The universe was trying VERY hard to stop me so I think whatever I experience past this point is my own fault. I’ve signed the waiver.

Here’s where we’re at right now:

Everyone (except Felix?) is affected by the akuma “Risk”, whose power causes people within earshot to make impulsive decisions.

Felix is likely after the family rings again, and has taken over Adrien’s horrible modeling trip to stalk/rob Nathalie. I have yet to see how this affects Adrien negatively but I’m sure life will, uh, find a way.

No idea if Uncle Gabe is aware of this. He did set a trap for Felix in the office safe but that was a while ago; and he’s currently trashing Paris with a sentimonster believing Adrien is safe with Nathalie (he’s not lol) so I’m leaning towards him being genuinely ignorant.

There’s a VERY high possibility Ladybug is about to give a Miraculous to the wrong cousin.

So I’m very nervous. Lessgo.

- No recap! I don’t think the last double feature had them either; I remember leaving a while between “Truth” and “Lies” at the beginning of the season and being very confused over stuff I forgot. Guess you either sink or swim when Miraculous decides to do some serious storytelling.

- So we start where we abruptly left off: with Adrien entering the Forbidden Office in search of his dad, finding Felix’s Phantom Thief monocle (what IS that thing...) and getting distracted by today’s sentimonster stomping through the city. He dashes up to his room, transforming into Chat Noir as he goes and leaping gracefully out the window without pause! Or paws. Haha. I’m in danger.

- Next we rehash the scene of Marinette talking with Tikki on the station roof, and getting the bright idea to go rescue “Adrien” (who is Felix in disguise) as Pegabug. She retrieves the horse glasses from her yoyo pocket dimension and is about to unify the two Miraculous when her attention is also caught by Strike Back. SHE JUST STARES, THEN TAKES THE GLASSES OFF AND PUTS THEM AWAY AGAIN. The timing was very funny. Brawl now, true love later! >:0

- Cut to the interior of the Startrain, and now THIS I’m interested in. Nathalie is seated next to “Adrien”, who is actually Felix, and he’s glaring out the window either in boredom or cooking up a cunning plan. Definitely waiting for Nathalie to let her guard down so he can rob her. First old men and now disabled women; where will it end, Felix??

- Nathalie gently puts her hand over “Adrien’s” in a way I’m sure she thinks is reassuring, showing off the family ring in full view. Isn’t actually touching this poor attention-starved kid way above her paygrade? She wouldn’t even give him a hug in “Felix” when she walked in on him crying in his room. Maybe her appreciation for Adrien has grown considering he brought her snacks while she was bedridden. Gabriel just came in and ate them while venting to her, but still.

Also, if this was Adrien, Nathalie flashing this ring so much (between the previous scene in the study and now) would be super rude, right? I know Adrien supports whatever his father has with her and it’s Gabriel who kicks off every time it’s brought up; but showing off his mom’s wedding ring like this with no explanation is another level.

And ALSO, again, where is this particular ring meant to have come from? The cover story in “Gabriel Agreste” is that Ol’ Gabe graciously bestowed his own ring unto his dear nephew (after Felix robbed, tricked and nearly outed him as Shadow Moth), and the other is still officially ‘missing’ because it disappeared with Emilie, who is definitely not in a fridge in the basement. Are they both banking on Adrien not recognising it, and it’s just terrible luck that this is Felix?

- ANYWAY. Felix reacts like he’s been burned, and I’m sure it’s because the ring he’s desperate for is right there on Nathalie’s hand, but I’m in tears thinking he’s just fucking OUTRAGED at being touched without permission. Like the first episode where he went to shake Adrien’s hand and got full-on hugged instead. He came here to rob people and he is feeling SO violated right now?? >:/

- Nathalie encourages “Adrien” to “try to make the most out of this trip”, and highlights how he’ll get to see the world and then come back to his friends with lots to share. Not that I believe this is going ahead, but I hope that means she’s at least planning to give him a decent amount of freedom; like in the Shanghai Special where Gabriel actually let Adrien go out and explore the city (with a bodyguard). Maybe she really does care! Just a little bit. :’)

- Felix says something ominous about “seizing the opportunity when it presents itself”, so I guess he’s recovered from being so RUDELY manhandled - literally the worst thing that’s happened to him today! Move over, Aunt Emilie’s frozen corpse! - and is back to plotting atrocities.

- Lila interrupts to claim she and Adrien will become “the best friends in the world” on this trip! Now, Felix has been mostly separate from Adrien’s social circle with the exception of Kagami and Chloe (and that time the Girl Squad tried to kill him), so he doesn’t know Lila’s reputation as a liar or how much grief she’s put his cousin through; but maybe it takes a sneaky manipulator to know one?

- “Adrien” tells Lila he “hopes so with all his heart”. This should be her first clue that something isn’t right. He was ready to tear her to SHREDS during the photoshoot this morning and now he’s Prince Charming! Would the real Adrien be extra polite in front of Nathalie? :/

Also, if this is grounds for suspicion, does Lila know Adrien has a strikingly identical cousin? She hasn’t been around for this arc but she may have heard about him from their classmates. I wonder if Felix is common knowledge to people who haven’t been directly involved with his nonsense, or if he’s some kind of horrible unlockable item once you reach a certain friendship level with Adrien.

- At any rate, “Adrien” excuses himself to the bathroom with his duffel bag. Lila pokes her head over the seats with wide eyes to watch him leave; does she know something’s up? Gotta take those every-15-minutes model showers, I’m sure the Startrain has the facilities for it.

- In the train bathroom, Felix takes the fake Peacock Miraculous out of his bag and affixes it to his chest. What is it about the Agreste family and wielding dark magic in train bathrooms? The twins HAVE to be sentimonsters because I refuse to believe Felix isn’t related to Gabriel in any way, it’s ridiculous. He also retrieves Nathalie’s tablet and deletes her Candy Crush flicks through scans of the Miraculous book to find details on the Peacock and how to activate it. I’m so upset Shadow Moth’s presence confirms this brooch is a fake; this would be so cool! :(

- Felix is perplexed when no kwami appears from the brooch. He tries the magic words - “Duusu, spread my feathers!” - and nothing happens. He crushes the brooch in the palm of his hand and it shatters easily, proving it’s just cheap costume jewelry his uncle planted as a decoy.

- FELIX REALISES HE’S BEEN TRICKED. Score one for Uncle Gabe! Turnabout is fair play after all, and it’s taken him over three episodes to get back at his nephew in any way. During their last conflict Gabriel may have been a fool dressed as a peacock in his secretary’s bedroom, but he’s not a fool dressed as Adrien Agreste in a train bathroom with no Miraculous. That’s Felix.

- Back to Paris and Strike Back is stomping around. He looks like one of those Laputa golems (which I’m sure is intentional). Ladybug and Chat meet up and fall into sync right away, agreeing to wrap this up quick because they’ve both got other pressing business. This pressing business is Felix, lol.

- Shadow Moth leers from the top of the Eiffel Tower. Risk (who I completely forgot about, lmao) cycles through the sentimonster’s path of destruction and influences nearby Parisians to stick around in the danger zone so they can catch sight of the superheroes/get videos for social media. I’m surprised this isn’t a problem they have to deal with more often since the heroes are very popular; this is exactly what Alya was doing in Season 1 and it’s apparently been less than a year since then!

- Ladybug has to actively “shoo!” the civilians away, which is very funny. She also drags Risk out of danger, not realising he’s an akuma; then Risk pushes straight onwards again and nearly gets hit by a car. WHY IS EVERY SINGLE TODDLER IN MIRACULOUS SO TERRIBLE.

- Chat’s Risk mark lights up and he nearly Cataclysms the sentimonster, which as we know is a HUGE no-no because it makes them go haywire. Ladybug trips it with her yoyo wire instead, and Strike Back makes a massive dent in the city with millions in property damage. Chat gets annoyed and says that was literally no better than what he was gonna do! Which isn’t actually correct but I’ll give him this one; he deserves a little snark today. As a treat.

- The heroes go on to argue, appropriately, about how Ladybug never wants to take any risks. I like this exchange; both kids are very animated and I love Chat’s flow of sassy/disgruntled expressions in particular. Chat asks if Ladybug would ‘risk’ knowing who he was behind the mask, and Ladybug gets angry because she does NOT want to have this discussion right now! It’s REALLY dumb at this point. EITHER LET THEM SHARE IDENTITIES OR STOP ENGINEERING MORE REASONS WHY IT WOULD BE FINE TO DO SO, MY GOODNESS.

- This impromptu debate distracts them from Strike Back, who nearly flattens them. Chat grabs Ladybug despite them being super mad at each other right now (which is sweet); and the pair crashland in the streets and roll several feet while STILL arguing. This reminds me a whole lot of Stormy Weather and I wonder if that’s on purpose. Look how far we’ve come.

Geez, remember when this show wasn’t exactly what we’d expected but it also wasn’t a mess? Those golden days of staying up late and watching low-res Korean TV streams waiting for a new episode with no subtitles, instead of putting new content off for weeks because it’s too exhausting to see what they’ll do next. Edorazzi remembers. :’)

- Chat asks “Why do you know the identities of the other Miraculous holders? Why not me?” And Ladybug yet again tells him she’s protecting his identity in case Shadow Moth akumatizes her. Clearly the scriptwriters know what they meant, but I took that as Chat questioning why Ladybug shut him out of knowing ANY of the other superheroes so he couldn’t even help with stuff like Miraculous distribution. Wasn’t that where this started? Why are we back here??

- Chat says either he, she or both of them (I can’t figure out exactly what he says :/) will NEVER get akumatized. Ladybug has a flashback to Chat Blanc.

ARE WE REALLY BRINGING THIS UP. Like I’m sorry, but if we’re dragging that mess of an episode back into relevancy then Bunnyx should show up to slap Ladybug on the wrist whenever she’s about to do something which dooms the universe (because Marinette is somehow capable of breaking her own timeline without any outside influence); therefore if Bunnyx isn’t here right now then it’s fine and she has no reason to be defensive. Which is ridiculous but that’s the canon logic we’re living with. Welcome to the clown tent.

- “You don’t know what you’re talking about!” / “Maybe because you never talk to me about ANYTHING!” HE’S RIGHT, YOU KNOW. Ladybug doesn’t have to full-on share identities if she isn’t comfortable, but this season has a pattern of Chat getting left out of things and then being blamed for not knowing what’s up. Everything from Sentibubbler to the Scarabella mess and now this! JUST COMMUNICATE, HOLY SHIT. WHERE IS FELIX.

- IT’S ESCALATING. Through her earpiece Rena Furtive prompts Ladybug to dodge an attack. Ladybug’s Risk mark lights up and she thanks Rena loudly for Chat to hear. For a second she ACTUALLY tries to pretend she doesn’t know what Chat’s talking about, but ultimately confesses that Rena (who supposedly gave up her Miraculous way back in Sentibubbler) is on watch except she can’t tell him where. I guess this is a sign she does want to share this stuff with Chat and just doesn’t have the courage; but it comes across as a slap in the face and more like she forgot he was there. Chat is getting FURIOUS and I’m not happy either, the disrespect!!! >:0

- Ladybug spots Risk heading back into the danger zone once again and swings off to save him. Chat spots Mayor Bourgeois breaking out his film camera to record the sentimonster and does the same (and it’s nice to see more followup on André’s passions!). The kids realise they can’t fight the sentimonster if they’re constantly saving civilians, so Ladybug goes for “reinforcements”. Which Chat isn’t allowed to know about, of course.

- Is she going for Felix, believing he’s Adrien and that this will be the perfect excuse to keep him in Paris. MAYBE.

- Ladybug dishes out a bunch of Miraculous to the usual suspects (Nino, Kagami, Juleka, Zoe and Mylene), including Marc and Ivan this time! That’s nice. Where is Luka though? I get the feeling the writers banned him from the rest of the season because all the drama comes from Chat and Ladybug arguing/ miscommunicating, and we’ve seen from Wishmaker that Luka knows exactly how to deal with that nonsense. Can’t change his nature so just lock him in the houseboat until Season 5. :/

- Apparently Roi Singe is here too. Why wasn’t he in the lineup? The heroes launch several attacks on Strike Back and nothing works, the sentimonster just duplicates and copies their powers into its clones. Is this an allegory for Ol’ Gabe FINALLY figuring out how to dupe Felix, by absorbing his trickery and turning it back on him? :V

- Strike Back rips up the Ferris wheel to throw at them, and Ryuko unknowingly deflects it towards the top of the TV studio where Rena is hiding. Carapace SCREAMS her name and throws Shellter over the building so she won’t get hit.

- EVERYONE INCLUDING SHADOW MOTH IS NOW AWARE RENA IS STILL AN ACTIVE MIRACULOUS HOLDER. Which could have been avoided if Nino just didn’t YELL OUT HER WHOLEASS NAME, right? It’s reasonable to protect one of the tallest buildings in Paris; might not have been the wisest use of his power but nobody would question it! It’s not even implied he shouted because of Risk, this particular dumbassery is all his own.

How on Earth did Nino know, though? Did Alya bring him back into the loop? I seriously don’t remember that happening, but hell if I can recall half of what goes on in this show any more. Not to be Old Woman Yells At Cloud but I used to have such a good grip on what was happening in Miraculous and now I’m barely clinging on. :’V

Also, for once Carapace is the one everybody’s going >:0 at, which is a nice change from him picking on Chat Noir so much this season. Ah ha ha.

- OKAY. Alya confesses she told Nino about Rena Furtive because she just “couldn’t keep it from him”, so this is something that happened behind the scenes. LADYBUG SOUNDS SUPER MAD AT HER. This is so funny. I don’t hate any of these characters but they’ve been deeply frustrating for the latter half of the season and watching this all turn around is cathartic. :D

- Rena FINALLY notices everyone’s frog-shaped marks. There’s also a moment where Ladybug is about to wring Risk’s neck but Chat intervenes because he’s “good with kids” and Risk clings to him immediately. It’s pretty cute.

- CHAT GETS THROWN FROM OFFSCREEN INTO A BUILDING. GUESS BABYSITTING DIDN’T GO WELL. The heroes finally realise Risk is an akuma, and Shadow Moth is pleased because now Ladybug will second-guess everything she does. It’s a neat little two-layered plan; first she’s blissfully reckless and then she’s paranoid! Ladybug immediately orders Chat to go detransform because she won’t trust him with his Cataclysm, which I’m sure will do wonders for this argument they’re already having. :/

- Chat is left on the rooftop as everyone else leaves, and the fragile little way he mumbles “But I can help...” has me in TEARS. His Risk mark flares up a moment later and he leaps off towards one of the Strike Back clones, presumably to do something reckless that Ladybug will get mad about.

- Meanwhile, the girls try to de-akumatize Risk but can’t find his akumatized object because he hid it. Which is REALLY sneaky and honestly something Shadow Moth should instruct every akumatized person to do. Forget all these “megakumas” or whatever else Ol’ Gabe’s working on, just hide the key items and they’ll be borderline unstoppable!

- Chat gets pinned by a vehicle and tries to Cataclysm it to get free, only to have his attack stolen by Strike Back. That’s disappointing; I really expected him to prove Ladybug’s fears wrong by being sensible regardless of risk-taking but I guess we’re not doing that today. :/

- Ladybug gets mad and Lucky Charms up a day-old zoo ticket. Not sure what her plan is, but she decides she needs someone who hasn’t been hit by Risk - and of course her mind goes to Adrien-who-is-actually-Felix who she vividly recalls having no mark on his neck as she watched him board the train. UH OH. I KNEW THIS WAS GOING TO HAPPEN, I JUST DIDN’T KNOW HOW.

- Ladybug goes on a confusing tangent about whether or not her ideas are too risky, just as Shadow Moth anticipated. She plucks the Horse and the Rabbit Miraculous out of her yoyo dimension - never mind how she has the stopwatch after Season 1 established it belonged to Alix as a family heirloom. I don’t know WHAT is going on with the Bunnyx subplot any more, IT’S ALL STUPID - and merges them with the Ladybug Miraculous to come out looking like a video game avatar when you equip all your high stat items at once; then jumps through a portal to (I presume) give Felix his fifth heart attack of the day.

- Pegabunnybug and “Adrien” come out of adjacent bathrooms at the same time and spook each other. It’s like when the business convention has to share a venue with the sci-fi anime con! Felix instantly goes into recovery mode, as is his #1 talent, and (after subtly throwing his bag of stolen goods into the bathroom stall and closing the door) puts on his best wide-eyed Adrien impression.

- Instantly getting into his personal space, Ladybug checks “Adrien’s” neck and confirms he’s unmarked by Risk. If Felix is trying to save his cousin from being a doormat this is a sign to redouble his efforts; he dresses up as Adrien for 20 minutes and everyone keeps touching him! >:0

- She produces a Miraculous from her yoyo (lord help me I can’t recognise any of them any more :/) and Felix is very interested in this little pocket dimension. Now I was already assuming he’d steal whichever item this is but IS HE PLANNING TO SWIPE THE WHOLE DAMN YOYO? SWEETIE. IF THIS IS WHERE IT’S GOING NO WONDER PEOPLE ARE MAD AT HIM.

- Oh, the Dog Miraculous! SO IT’S GONNA BE LIKE THAT WHEN FELIX IS TRADITIONALLY A CAT HOLDER, IS IT. Not that I’m NOT Pro-Felix, and I guess they’ve recast the snake, the bee and technically the mouse when their holders didn’t suit, but this feels kinda mean to Sabrina when she’s done nothing to deserve losing it. I already know giving the power of item retrieval to a thief is a terrible idea, but I wonder who’s most at risk here; Nathalie, Gabriel or Ladybug?

- I wonder about “Adrien” doubting himself for a second here. Is that part of Felix’s impression of his pathetic cousin or a genuine reaction? I don’t see the point in hesitating if Ladybug is freely offering what he wants but maybe he’s just covering his ass; can’t look too eager.

I’ve talked about this before but this is what I mean with Felix, you know? When it comes to scenes like this nearly every Miraculous character can be sorted into two categories: “genuine” or “ingenuine but it’s very obvious”; but despite Felix’s theatrical villainy he has no clear goal or motivation like everyone else. I know this is a kiddie show for babies but I think the shift in parameters is why I’m consistently baffled and changing my interpretation of what’s happening.

That said, I’m sure he’s being fake as hell right now; just something to bring up. Let’s continue.

- HIS REACTION IS SO CUTE WHEN BARKK APPEARS. This is what Felix was expecting when he put on the fake Peacock Miraculous and he’s clearly amazed to see it for real! Now I think about it, wasn’t Barkk a little set apart from the other kwami in a couple of previous episodes; being a bit more vigilant and purpose-driven? Maybe she(?) and Felix will get along? :0

- OH MY GOD, THE TRANSFORMATION!!! THEY GAVE FELIX HIS THIGH HIGHS. GOD FUCKING BLESS. It’s a little disappointing he’s pretending to be Adrien right now, so we still don’t know what a costume tailored to Felix himself would look like (less gaudy than this, I imagine), but this is a lot more flattering than whatever Sabrina had going on and has several beats of Felix’s classic Chat Noir suit. The boots! The ball “bell”! The sharp shoulders, sleek arms and big ears!!! （ｉДｉ）

Throwing in a comparison. Those boots are spot on, pun fully intended.

Yet again I should switch this episode off here, I really should. Every single Felix Episode has a point where it can only go downhill and this is where I should stop; where he has yet to do anything horrific and also got a cute transformation. Alas, I press play. :(

- Yep, he immediately touches Ladybug’s yoyo under the pretence of learning how his powers work. Fortunately it’s ineffective since he needs to use the ball and not his bare hand, but he’s gunning for it. FELIX NOOOO.

- Ladybug’s plan is to go back into the past, I guess to find where Risk hid his akumatized object. That must be what the zoo ticket is for, I just figured it out. This is what happens when I don’t get a recap in a two-parter. She takes “Adrien” into Bunnyx’s rabbit hole dimension, and I can SEE him having an absolute meltdown trying to process all this but he’s holding it together like a champ.

I should start keeping a scoreboard of Felix’s heart attacks because this makes at least six in one day. Dropping into the Butterfly Lair, discovering Emilie’s corpse, Gabriel nearly catching him in the study, Nathalie touching his hand (>:0!!!), Pegabunnybug ambushing him on the train and now the rabbit hole dimension scrambling his brain. Good thing he’s probably a sentimonster because this would kill a normal person.

- They get spat out into the zoo scene from the previous episode, where Risk has just been akumatized. “Adrien” is here to simply throw the ball and hit the akumatized object; I guess so they can locate it in the future and not disrupt the timeline by grabbing it now.

I’d question why Ladybug couldn’t just quadruple up on Miraculous and do this herself, but they have thrown in the crippling doubt over her own actions (and I’m sure the excuse to get Adrien in on things is appealing to her) so fair enough. Turns out I was right about Felix being the key because he’s a sociopathic little bastard who can operate normally under these circumstances. :V

- Wow, Felix actually does as instructed! I thought he would tag Ladybug’s yoyo and run, but he just dutifully hits the frog toy and they both jump back into the portal. I assume he can’t pick more than one target without refueling his kwami, right?

- They return to the present and PARIS IS IN FLAMES, SOMEHOW. Is this shot a reference to the PV with Felix and Bri on the rooftop under the burning sky? It’s much less cinematic and Felix is dressed like a dog, but it definitely feels like a homage considering the characters we’re dealing with. That’s fun.

- The Miraculous Holders are dying, and Chat Noir is either the last one standing OR he’s gone off the rails and caused this whole mess. Ladybug instructs “Adrien” (who is still unnamed as a hero, I think?) to use his power and they locate the akumatized object with ease. This solves the Risk problem but now they have to deal with the duplicating sentimonster!

- Chat eavesdrops on Ladybug absolutely WORSHIPING the new guy. My first reaction was “wow she really is obsessed with Adrien”, but this is also after Adrien failed spectaclarly as Aspik (and Viperion became the new Snake Miraculous Holder), which I don’t think gets brought up often enough and puts a new angle on Ladybug congratulating him for doing everything right on his “first try”. :’0

- LADYBUG BLURTS OUT ADRIEN’S NAME. GIRL WHAT THE HECK, THE RISK MARKS ARE GONE. IS SHE JUST DUMB.

- Felix picks some absolutely horrific name for himself that I don’t know how to spell (but have since discovered it’s “Flairmidable”). I guess it doesn’t matter since he’ll probably never be a Miraculous Holder again. Maybe he eschewed some more on-the-nose dog puns like “Retriever” or “Courage” or Scrappy, lmao just to make Adrien look ridiculous? I can dream. Either way this should be a massive clue he ISN’T Adrien, who settled on the very creative “Black Cat” and had to stay up all night with Plagg’s help to come up with “Catwalker”, but nobody’s close enough to him to connect those dots. Adrien’s arguably better at costume design though; the cousins should pool their talents sometime.

- Chat seems to have missed Ladybug’s slip of the tongue, so he’s just very upset to see her bonding so hard with this new guy. It’s like a glimpse into an alternate universe where Adrien and Chat really ARE different people. Don’t worry honey, Flairmidable isn’t interested in girls like that; he just wants to rob her! >:V

- Ladybug returns Froggy’s plush toy to him, protective charm attached. Also, Rena Furtive is now out in the open with everyone? I know her existence got re-confirmed but unless Ladybug’s about to take her Miraculous away this seems like a horrible idea. Shadow Moth knows who she is! At least preserve the illusion of being a different person!!!

- Everyone goes to recharge, which I’m sure will give Felix another shot at stealing that yoyo. Chat is left alone and despondent. :(

- Shadow Moth is disappointed by Risk’s defeat, but is certain Ladybug must have made a mistake and “can’t wait to see what it is”. THAT WOULD BE FELIX, A TERRIBLE HORRIBLE MISTAKE UNCLE GABE IS PERSONALLY FAMILIAR WITH. :)

- Revisiting the sewers, Ladybug and Flairmidable detransform either side of the split tunnels like Marinette and Adrien have done before. Mari resolves to return “Adrien” to the Startrain and feels wrong for interfering (as if the real Adrien didn’t have a whole outburst just this morning about how much he hated this?), but “Adrien” claims he wants to stay here and fight by her side instead, leering at Barkk in a comically menacing way. GUESS THE NONSENSE IS STARTING. I UNCLIPPED MY SEATBELT FOR A SECOND THERE BUT TIME TO STRAP BACK IN. :/

- “You’ve given me the courage I needed, Ladybug. I feel like from now on, NOTHING can stop me.” OKAY EDGELORD, TONE IT DOWN.

I really want to know what Felix’s goals are here. He hasn’t shown interest in destroying the superheroes like Shadow Moth or obtaining power/control like Lila and Chloe - it’s mainly been about getting the family rings plus a side order of ruining Gabriel’s day (and Adrien’s if he gets caught in the crossfire, sorry buddy) and his interest in the Miraculous seems like a relatively new thing. He was also horrified by finding Emilie which tells me he’s not completely sociopathic. Clearly he’s about to do something horrible but I have trouble believing he’s just a villain with no good motive, you know?

- Back topside, the remaining Miraculous Holders (plus Rena, sans Chat) are on the exact same rooftop they nearly died on earlier. Very smart. Ladybug shows up with Flairmidable and officially introduces him as “the new holder of the Dog Miraculous!” SO I GUESS IT’S OVER FOR SABRINA. OOF. Chat Noir pops up over the railing right as she says this (while gazing at Flairmidable with adoration) which is VERY funny. Like oh no you DON’T. >:0

- Ladybug smooshes the pair of them together, clearly happy to have her two favourite guys side by side (Viperion wasn’t even invited today, second oof) and delighted with the cat/dog dynamic. Once again she’s ignoring Chat’s very obvious discomfort as if this setup is perfect! She laughs hysterically as the other Miraculous Holders look on with concern.

- Chat absolutely HATES this guy. Flairmidable gives a polite little “Nice working with you, Chat Noir :)” but it’s tinged with the same venom as Felix’s intro scene where he called Adrien his “favourite cousin”. I’m convinced this kid just can’t say ANYTHING nice without sounding evil, exactly like his uncle. :’)

- I’m wondering if this will be the consequence of all the times Chat had to put up with Rena. He didn’t trust her at ALL but had to just shut up and do what he was told as the girls worked everything out behind his back. Now Flairmidable is giving off positively evil vibes, but is Chat going to push it or assume Ladybug knows what she’s doing and he doesn’t have the right to say anything?

- Ladybug tells the boys to “shake paws” like they’re actual pets. Hold on to your ring, Chat, we all know what happened LAST time Felix shook hands with anyone. Chat reaches out very reluctantly but Flairmidable firmly grasps his hand and shakes it, putting in the extra distance like he’s REALLY determined to be friendly. Ladybug is trilling in excitement and completely ignoring Chat very obviously wanting to die right now. I feel kinda bad for them both, honestly. Also, is Felix lefthanded? :0

- Ladybug assures the boys they’re going to be spending a LOOOOT of time together now Flairmidable is on the team. FOREVER. Wasn’t this the exact problem they faced in Kuro Neko; when Adrien put on his princely public persona as Catwalker and Ladybug couldn’t function around him because he was too hot? Does her determination to have Adrien on the team overpower her decision not to work with anyone she’s attracted to? I’m sure this won’t matter because Felix will have robbed her by the end of the day and never be allowed a Miraculous again, but still.

- Ladybug Lucky Charms up a pair of sunglasses which Marc duplicates. While she’s explaining whatever the hell this plan is, Flairmidable subtly touches his ball to her yoyo. I KNEW he was up to shit. There’s various shots of everyone wearing their shades, and Flairmidable carefully handling his pair while Chat has just slapped them on and continued to glare is very funny.

- Flairmidable gets some kinda look on his face when he asks what Ladybug is planning to do with the sentimonsters, like he’s nervous. Hmm.

- Everyone leaps away but Flairmidable hangs back from the crowd. He looks like Dave Strider in these glasses and that wasn’t a comparison I was prepared to make today.

- Pegabug OPENS A GIANT PORTAL WHICH DROPS THE SENTIMONSTERS INTO THE FUCKING SUN. OKAY??? I GUESS THAT’S WHY EVERYONE NEEDED THE SHADES BUT JESUS....

- Flairmidable takes off his shades with a look of sadness, drops them at his feet where they shatter, then turns away with a sorrow-filled whisper of “I’m sorry”.

And I’m going to interrupt myself here with a post-liveblog sidebar because I WAS DUMB AS ROCKS ON MY FIRST WATCH. I initially interpreted this as Felix enjoying himself around the superheroes (especially after Chat accused him of having no friends; maybe this is his first experience being accepted by a group of peers) and being reluctant to betray them for whatever his bigger goal is, but now I absolutely believe he was talking to the sentimonsters, not the heroes. He was fine dispatching Risk (an akuma) but instantly nervous about what Ladybug planned to do with the Strike Back clones, and ultimately had to watch them die at the hands of the Miraculous Heroes - in a sequence framed a lot more dramatically than other episodes - while being unable to step in. Jesus FUCK. “Felix is a sentimonster” isn’t even a question at this point, is it.

ANYWAY.

- At the top of the Eiffel Tower, Shadow Moth is so enraged he jumps over the edge. I’m sure he’s bounding away to do more evil but THAT’S SO FUNNY; HE’S LIKE A TODDLER.

- Rena and Ladybug land in an alley just like before, perfectly synchronised. Are they still gonna have a serious discussion or is Ladybug riding high on inducting “Adrien” into the gang and ready to forgive everything?

- Marinette is willing to let things go, saying she understands the need to share everything with her best friend (Chat Noir is CRYING on a rooftop somewhere), but it’s actually Alya who renounces her Miraculous because she knows it’s too risky to continue as Rena now Shadow Moth knows? WHOA. CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT. I’ve been liking Alya more and more this season; I found her pretty irritating and reckless earlier in the show (when all her plotlines were about hindering Ladybug, having a boyfriend and/or not respecting Marinette’s boundaries with Adrien) but she’s really pulling through. Miraculous or not I hope she stays as Mari’s confidante.

- Ladybug goes back to the sewers to find Adrien, who ISN’T THERE. QUELLE SURPRISE.

- Cut to Gabriel returning home (in a very dignified way, after leaping off the Eiffel Tower in a blind rage) while on a call to Nathalie, complaining about this plan failing and demanding she cancel everything and bring Adrien home. THE WHIPLASH ADRIEN WOULD BE GETTING IF HE WERE ACTUALLY THERE. He strides into his study, still on the phone, and cue the funniest moment so far of this Gabriel/Felix feud.

- FLAIRMIDABLE IS JUST LOUNGING THERE, FULL COSTUME, FEET UP ON SHADOW MOTH’S DESK AND PLAYING WITH THE BALL. Strikingly similar to the way he greeted Adrien in the previous episode, and again lefthanded.

He does shift to spinning it with his right hand later, and I think he was messing with Adrien’s basketball righthanded too; so Felix must be ambidextrous. It would certainly fit his character considering he takes whichever side is most beneficial to him.

- GABRIEL DROPS HIS PHONE, AND AFTER TWO FULL EPISODES FINALLY ACKNOWLEDGES FELIX’S PRESENCE IN HIS HOME. Albeit this time with genuine surprise instead of murderous rage. Felix clarifies that he was the mistake Ladybug made, which is what we’ve all been saying.

I did have an extra note here to the effect of “I haven’t forgotten the remorseful way he abandoned the heroes tho”, but that’s out the window now I’ve realised Felix was upset about the sentimonsters. In his mind the Miraculous Holders probably deserve whatever they get!

- Also, Nathalie starts dying on the Startrain. Lila notices and looks pleased about it. Moving on.

- Cut to who I assume is the real Adrien exiting his ensuite bathroom, back in his normal clothes, and Ladybug leaping in through his open window. TO CHEW HIM OUT FOR STEALING THE MIRACULOUS FELIX TOOK, I’M SURE.

- Okay, at least Ladybug’s giving him the benefit of the doubt at first; assuming she forgot to tell Adrien where they should meet after the battle. You could say something about her trusting Adrien is in the right while Chat Noir is currently always in the wrong at ALL times, but I’m just glad Adrien’s reputation isn’t actually suffering because of Felix’s mischief. I’m Team Felix here but Adrien deserves a break.

- Ladybug mentions the train and Adrien realises what happened, ominously growling “FELIX”, and Ladybug’s horror movie reaction is amazing. Chill out guys, you don’t even know what he’s done yet! Adrien was still trying to figure out how Felix screwed him over by commandeering this modeling trip, you always expect the worst. Yes he’s actively committing an atrocity as we speak, but you shouldn’t just assume! >:0

- Back to the office and this is INCREDIBLE. I love these shots of Felix just making himself at home in other people’s stuff; he looks SO fucking full of himself. I also notice he’s got paw pads on his boots, which is another point on the “honouring Felix’s old costume” scoreboard:

The classic beans.

- So Felix wants the Peacock Miraculous now. He threatens to tell Adrien about the secret waifu dungeon beneath the mansion BUT offers Gabriel a trade: the Peacock for all the other Miraculous, and he’ll return the family ring he stole. I can’t believe we thought Lila was going to be the new villain striking deals with Shadow Moth, Felix is outrageous!

And I’m interrupting myself again, but lots of my commentary on this scene was “why does Felix want the Peacock? What’s up with him? Why is he giving up on the rings and why doesn’t he “need” the one he took any more?”; blah blah blah. He’s a sentimonster and the Peacock Miraculous is like handing a dog its own leash. Endless freedom baybee.

I think he was after Emilie’s ring - the one Nathalie currently has - because it contains Adrien’s amok (while Felix’s is likely in the ring he’s been wearing this whole time, which I believe belonged to his dad?), so he’s comfy returning Gabriel’s ring in this bargain because its only value is sentimental. I’m playing 5D chess in my brain with all this but I honestly think that’s what’s happening.

- “If I’d wanted to harm you, Uncle, I would have done it a long time ago.” KINDA FUCKED UP, BUT I GUESS THAT’S ON PAR WITH “I need only snap my fingers to make you disappear from here”. Affectionate death threats must run in the Agreste/Vanily families and Adrien gets excluded because he’s sensitive. Felix really tries being nice to him with the “my favourite cousin” stuff but it still comes out sounding evil. :/

- HOLY SHIT, GABRIEL ACTUALLY DOES IT. He renounces Duusu and swaps the Peacock brooch for the family ring!!! Both he and Felix hesitate warily before grabbing the items from each other; they really do NOT trust one another (despite being family; or probably because they’re family) and I love that.

- Felix makes good on his promise and “fetches” Ladybug’s compact. Gabriel grabs it from him in glee, cackling that Ladybug has FINALLY lost. GUESS FELIX IS HIS FAVOURITE NOW. Sucks to be the Miraculous Holders but I always said some kind of bargaining system would make things way easier than just threatening each other all the time!

- Upstairs, Ladybug is having a panic attack in Adrien’s room. Wouldn’t the yoyo disappear if she detransforms then reappear on her person? It’s tough to think clearly in a panic though and I do feel for her. I want to give her a hug. :(

- ADRIEN IS A TOTAL BESTIE. 10/10. He takes charge of the situation, instructs Ladybug to think and breathe, and shoves her into the bathroom where she can detransform in privacy. His ring is in full view for this shot - he’s ABSOLUTELY in Chat Noir mode and THIS is why he’s her partner! But poor Mari doesn’t trust anything about herself, her decisions or even that Adrien isn’t Felix right now and tricking her again. Sweetheart...! ; n ;

- Downstairs, Felix renounces the Dog Miraculous to Gabriel as well - who is cackling over his haul - and leaves the study with (I assume) just the Peacock. I’m sure Adrien’s about to rugby tackle him across the foyer and THAT I would love to see.

- Ladybug retransforms (baby girl, sweetie, if only you’d done that instantly...! :’0) and is too late! Gabriel took ALL the Miraculous except hers, Chat Noir’s, and the Peacock. Even the Fox is gone because Alya gave it back to Marinette this afternoon. THIS HAS ALL WORKED OUT HORRIBLY. Is this implying Season 5 will draw back on the huge fleet of heroes but deliver on crazy new outfits for Gabriel? I hope so.

- Adrien gets a burst of courage (this time not from an akuma) and opens the bathroom door to speak to Ladybug; maybe planning to reveal his identity as Chat Noir to give better support than his civilian self can. She’s gone by the time he enters. :(

- Ladybug is outdoors crying in the rain. Hawk Moth (I guess he’s not Shadow Moth any more?) does a ridiculous Eye of Sauron thing in the sky; like his introduction in Origins except even campier with a massive ring of Miraculous symbols.

- During his evil speech we cycle through several of the (ex) Miraculous Holders looking mad about it. Hi Luka, nice to see you at least once before the season ends. They have Chloe here too and even she looks upset; could this be a hint she’s coming back as Queen Bee or at least allying with the heroes?? PLEASE. It’s only been half a season and I am SO tired of Zoe.

- Cut to Felix on the Startrain, and I’m sure Ladybug’s wellbeing comes first but frankly I’m amazed Chat Noir hasn’t camped out at the train station to beat his ass. He’s gotta go home sometime! >:0

We see the Peacock Miraculous has redesigned itself to suit him which is really cool. It reminds me a bit of his classic Black Cat ring.

The pointed edges almost look like cat ears.

Felix also looks, like... really happy to have it. Not ‘evil’ happy, relieved happy; holding it to his chest and closing his eyes with a peaceful smile. This is clearly important to him on a personal level and not just about causing more chaos. And here is my VERY belated realisation that Felix is a sentimonster who just won his own freedom, holy SHIT.

- Back to Ladybug. Chat Noir appears by her side, standing upright and fierce while she’s curled up and small. She FINALLY realises all the nonsense she’s been putting him through this season and can’t understand why he’s still here.

I’m glad they’re actually addressing this. I’ve enjoyed the angsty dynamic of Chat getting sidelined but it’s frustrating when every confrontation has gone nowhere. Marinette’s had a huge amount on her shoulders this season so I don’t blame her for being stressed and distracted, but she will NOT let Chat help her and has preferred to ignore/placate him in small doses instead of actually sitting down to address the problem. Like it’s wildly inconvenient he doesn’t know what’s going on with her, but she also won’t tell him and then gets mad when he steps on her toes. I don’t think they should reveal identities if Ladybug isn’t ready (and Chat is wrong to keep asking, even if he’s only pressing so hard because he thinks it’ll fix things), but it’s a big leap between that and just, like... keeping Chat in the loop so he isn’t confused. Fortunately that shouldn’t be a problem any more! :D

- ANYWAY. Chat pulls Ladybug to her feet and into a hug, swearing to her they’ll get all the Miraculous back one by one. GUESS THAT’S THE PLOT OF SEASON 5. Also the entirety of Paris is out here cheering for her (despite Hawk Moth blaming her for allowing this mess to happen) which is really sweet. And if the blush on her cheeks is any indication, maybe she’s falling in love with Chat Noir now? :0

Gorgeous final scene. Very atmospheric.

SO WOW. HOLY SHIT, WHAT AN EPISODE.

I was anticipating a Miracle-Queen-esque storyline which would take Felix from an intriguing character to a ridiculous villain with bland motives (and then I’d have to work overtime to insist he’s still likable/interesting), but this was so much more exciting than I expected!!! Once again Felix gets more done in one episode than the rest of the characters in a whole season, but the way the status quo has been changed up is fascinating. It might not be just Hawk Moth vs the Miraculous Heroes any more - it looks like Felix has created a third side for sentimonsters and he’ll ally with or step on whichever group benefits him most. This is WILD.

So my thoughts on Felix specifically. I think he’s a perfect example of a “chaotic neutral” character. Here’s a DND definition I swiped from Google:

‘A chaotic neutral character is an individualist who follows their own heart and generally shirks rules and traditions. Although chaotic neutral characters promote the ideals of freedom, it is their own freedom that comes first; good and evil come second to their need to be free.’

Doesn’t that sound like him? Like they literally printed this out and stuck it on the wall while designing Felix “God Damn” Vanily.

I imagine a lot of fans hate him because he’s made things harder for the main characters, and I agree, he did! He tricked Adrien, undid three seasons’ worth of progress, delivered all the extra Miraculous directly to Shadow Moth, and Ladybug’s breakdown towards the end of the episode was painful to watch. I absolutely get it. But that doesn’t make Felix a villain. It doesn’t even make him a bad person per se - he’s just not on anyone’s side. He shows up, gets his shit done and leaves. Fair play.

(That said, I really do think he was planning to help Adrien get out of this international photoshoot and got distracted by the ring. Yes he wanted to break into Gabriel’s safe, but he could have done that at just about any time without engaging his cousin! Felix took the time to push that “freedom is something you make” sentiment and yet again encourage Adrien to stand up for himself. I think he does genuinely care about him his wellbeing at least, not Adrien’s reputation lmao and just has no clue how involved Adrien is with the Miraculous stuff.)

I also don’t know what to expect from him in the future. I’ve seen assumptions he’ll wield the Peacock Miraculous as a new villain, but if he sees sentimonsters as living beings then will he? Shadow Moth and Mayura were fine creating and dismissing as many as they pleased but I don’t think Felix could do that; he’d have to be extremely picky if he even used it at all. Gabriel is the only one who knows Felix has the Peacock right now too; so it’s not like the Miraculous heroes will be kicking down his door looking for it (RIP my hopes for the London Special :’D). They know he’s a traitorous bitch but not what he got out of the deal; at least not yet.

I also wonder what his relationship will be with Duusu. Maybe part of Duusu’s emotional fragility is because he feels the same way about sentimonsters being alive/enslaved/abused, and if Felix is a sentimonster himself then they might get very attached to each other. And Felix has worked completely solo thus far, bouncing off people but having no actual allies, so giving him someone like Duusu (a magic pet who is a lot of responsibility and can hold a conversation) will be a very interesting exposé of his character.

I’m personally in the camp that he’ll huffily take care of Duusu’s ridiculous needs, loudly complaining that he should just ship the Peacock Miraculous back to his uncle while putting together an expensive Barbie Dreamhouse for him to live in and pre-slicing Duusu’s favourite trashy pizza rolls. Maybe they’ll just make Felix super duper evil in Season 5 but I can dream. :’)

SO. I THINK I’M DONE. JESUS CHRIST I NEED TO LIE DOWN. Thanks for reading if you got this far! Rehydrate, take an Ibuprofen, tell me your thoughts and I’ll see you again for the next round of Felix nonsense! ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

#LORD PRESERVE ME I HOPE THIS FORMATS CORRECTLY. i wasn't battling so much with the post editor this time but i'm still wary #hopefully this will be more entertaining than the previous review post now i know the outcome of this storyline!#also i have like. SO much flairmidable fanart to post. i adore this horrible dog boy #please let me know if you especially liked any part of this! but also go easy on me; i am fragile :'V #josie talks about things #felix graham de vanily #miraculous ladybug

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bitegore · 5 months

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new game + 33 and 100 pls?

33: Every Lie by My Darkest Days

This is a really generic breakup song but I like to sort of deliberately side-interpret things that aren't explicitly ruled against, and I was forced to read a biography that was 80% cheesy spy novel bullshit instead of factual yesterday so it's on the mind and I just watched an interesting g1 episode with Mirage, so all of that comes together to mean that I'd like to interpret shit like

Surrounded by every lie that won't come true Now you wanna take the time, now why would you? Think you're gonna make it right, but how could you? So I can't stay, surrounded by (surrounded by) every lie

through the (to-me) more interesting lens of spy shit.

Jazz is kind of the archetypal Bondian spy, and if you tie yourself into knots (read the lyrics closely while ignoring the tone for point and idea, then flip the pronouns from "I" to "you" and use that for tone) a little bit, you can make the case for this being a Bondian "cool epic gigachad coolguy dude gets the secrets and also finds the hottest girl in the building and has sex with her and she turns out to be an enemy spy who falls in love with him and can't do her job right" type story, and just focus in on that last bit.

Making Soundwave the Bond girl is immediately appealing but also really low-hanging and not that interesting. So I'm leaning toward either Rumble and/or Frenzy or Ravage, suddenly discovering their loyalties are under much more strain than they thought they were. And of course Megatron is Mr Evil Genius or whatever and shit.

From there it's all about writing Jazz and Jazz and not Jazz as Mr James Bond In Metal Now, and playing up the contrast between the actual plot (tv drama goofy shit) and his brain ("am i supposed to be believing this? did you get this idea from a tv drama?") for humor

100: A Little Faster by There For Tomorrow

There is literally nowhere I can go with this that doesn't end at Starscream -> Megatron in some way. I think what I'm thinking is. like. Early IDW, so a break from the new normal from me, I suppose, lol - in the very brief era where Starscream was an apparent fanboy of Megatron's work in the gladiatorial ring.

Starscream and Megatron are distant friends and close coworkers. Megatron is a figurehead already, and Starscream is efficient and effective and they work less as Megatron over Starscream so much as Megatron+Starscream - one team, planning things out. In these days Starscream and Megatron are equals.

There's a sequence of this - five or six scenes, maybe, at most a thousand words - detailing Megatron asking Starscream's advice, them slowly getting to know each other, Starscream being turned to before Megatron as the military voice in the room alongside Soundwave. Power clustering where Starscream believes he deserves it, around his fingers.

Then we skip ahead - to the early-mid war period, before Cybertron is uninhabitable but reaching a point for certain. This one is short - Starscream looking out across Cybertron's melting skyline, over the heads of a bunch of other commanders in a meeting, as everyone clamors for Megatron's opinion on some tactic and no one asks him. He's not the only mission commander any more, and he's not the only military mind. He's not irreplaceable, and he's finding that out as he's being replaced.

Then toward later, near the beginning of what happens on Earth with the whole serious-assassination-attempt deal.

Only now do we come to the part that makes this song relevant:

I'm sure it tasted oh so sweet But it was never good enough for me I bit the tongue behind my teeth ... You said you'd always keep your word Show me what you're after I thought you promised me the world Tell me what you're after Go on and take it way too far Cause here we are, waiting once again Show me what you're after Just a little faster, now

See what I mean?

Starscream takes a step to go get what he's been waiting for. Faster didn't come fast enough. Basically an Infiltration retelling from Starscream's point of view, and he is PISSED.

#red replies #korblez #spotify wrapped outline game

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lifeswack · 9 months

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I made a small analysis on the recent drdt episode!

(heres the link to the google doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1jvUy2txjIYfixGA_ortVeSpr1457b5GHb5hsH78vP8A/edit#heading=h.vp6z4l5f7buz ) and now heres what i have so far

insane literature girl (david) analysis

Peeps i used:

@nsmiaumiau,@moonzeiw

the link to my notes, its very scrambled so beware:

The Morse code at 4:21 translates to:

"You still believed in me despite everything I've done, but that's just a fantasy isn't it? I simply chose to believe you did. Afterall I'm incapable of being somebody without you

That morse code and the scene at 2:24 are bothreferring to xander, the one at 2:24 is obvious, you can even see david referring to xander as “important” this fact alone could solidify that the person david is referring to at 4:24 is xander however there are still a few more people who it could be

The reason both instances HAVE to refer to Xander is that David was never really close to anyone else. The only two people it could have possibly been are Hu and Arei, but through a process of elimination, we can rule out Hu since she's still alive. Even if you say Hu no longer respects david, While the Morse code at 4:21 uses past tense, it's safe to say Hu was never very close to David in the first place. Now, let's talk about Arei. She's a bit harder to debunk, but she's also eliminated for the same reason. Arei was only on good terms with David for about a day and a half, and that time was spent focused on her. Additionally, David wouldn't really feel like himself around Arei due to her vulgar and foul mouth, constantly berating everyone she knows. Although she may have changed slightly, she remained aggressive. However, to give Arei some credit, she knew David's secret, but I'm eliminating her as a possibility anyway. Xander is the only person we have confirmation (from 2:24) of being important to David. David even stated that Xander was a sort of role model to him, as Xander represented everything David pretended to be. But I do believe they were genuinely close; I mean, come on, guys, the bromance is there!

Before I present my own theories, let's debunk a theory:

that David manipulated or asked Xander to kill Teruko. I find this possibility plainly impossible (haha, Tsumugi reference). David is well aware of the consequences of murder and was genuinely distraught and upset when Xander died. Moreover, I don't believe David was the one who said "I have to kill Teruko Tawaki" at the beginning of DRDT; it is widely accepted to be Xander, but I have my own issues with the Xander theory.

Once again, huge thanks to @nsmiaumiau – she, he, they???? – for being a tremendous help throughout this.

The video contains word searches for every character except David, with text aligning to each character. Although some don't seem to match perfectly, we can use the descriptions as our best bet to assign the numbers to characters. Many of them appear nonsensical, like Hu's crossword being "???: Go and cry," Julia's being "Do it like that lets live together!" and Nico's being "even if you try to think idk!!! (Lmao)." I noticed that these texts are either sarcastic or ominous. Let's take Nico's, for instance; it's very sarcastic and oddly worded, so I'll try to make it less headache-inducing:

some of the word searches mention this mysterious (????) person, and it could either refer to David himself or the red-haired girl who keeps appearing. I'll do my best to make sense of everyone's crossword and figure out their significance.

Crossword analysis

(desclaimer despite coming tpo the conclusion these are davids thoughts i still analayze some of them as random strings of text and not thoughts)

1. Xander - His crossword is odd, saying "I have no idea if it counts (the world of abnormal sentient dance)." All of these make my head hurt, and this one takes the cake, but it does bring up the word "sentient," which I find interesting. Since I've already deduced these are David's thoughts, I'm going to have to look at it from that lens. The part "I have no idea if it counts" is what intrigues me. Like I said before, the Morse code at 4:21 is referring to Xander, so it might be David saying "I have no idea if Xander cares"??? It's definitely a shot in the dark, but I'm doing my best, okay!! The phrase "(abnormal sentient dance)" could be interpreted in several ways. I see it as an odd conversation, think of it as the phrase "the conversation has a mind of its own" – add "abnormal," and it would be akin to an odd conversation or if you add "dance," an odd situation.

2. Rose - Her crossword states "I think, therefore I am": This phrase is a famous philosophical statement attributed to the French philosopher René Descartes. In Latin, it is "Cogito, ergo sum." The phrase expresses the idea that the act of thinking itself proves one's existence. It's a foundational element in Descartes' philosophy and is often seen as a starting point for understanding one's own existence and consciousness.

"(confused)": The addition of "(confused)" after the famous philosophical statement adds an intriguing twist. It suggests that even though Rose acknowledges her existence through her thoughts, she experiences confusion or uncertainty about her identity or reality. The inclusion of this word creates an interesting contrast between certainty (thinking) and doubt (confusion).

3. Charles - The phrase "if you doubt" further proves that Charles is not one to accept things without scrutiny. This trait is vital in chemistry, as it involves testing hypotheses and theories through experimentation and analysis.

The second part of the crossword, "brittle things are broken," indicates Charles' knowledge of material properties, including fragility and how certain substances react under specific conditions. As an expert chemist, he understands the importance of understanding the characteristics of different substances to handle them safely and predict their behavior accurately. But that's just a literal analysis. In Charles's own words, "are you really gonna take that at face value?" So if I were to be crazy and analyze this, I would probably think this is referring to people. Maybe Charles doubted his brother at a certain point in time, and it led to his brother's death? :33

5. Arei - I think it's partially straightforward. The last time Arei got any major screen time was before she died. She cried to David about how she wanted to change and be a good person, questioning why Eden was allowed to be a good person without anyone taking advantage of her. Additionally, she was constantly harassed, assaulted, and verbally abused by her sisters, which resulted in her crying. This is likely what the crossword is referring to.

6. Ace - His crossword says, "'Right now, why do you go insane?'" Again, fairly straightforward. If I had to take a guess, it would be from how malnourished our poor boy is. His motive secret literally was "your body's falling apart, and yet you still refuse to eat." He's probably starving, and some of it is just because he's a hot-headed asshole.

7. Arturo’s is “mind exercises 1 2 3 4!” which confuses me just as much as xanders confuses me, if it were any other maybe i could have come up with something but this really just dosent fit him, he’s a cosmetic surgeon not a psychiatrist, since we know very little about Arturo im assuming this has something to do with his obsession with J, perhaps he finds J’s situation mentally stimulating?

8. Since julias the visual affects artist the part where it says “do it like that” maybee its referencing her more creative side an a way for things to go her way?

The second part, "let's live together," is intriguing and could imply several things. It might suggest her wish for harmony and collaboration in the theater world, emphasizing the importance of teamwork to create a successful production. Alternatively, it might hint at her vulnerability and a desire for deeper connections with others, as she tends to appear tough on the outside but is sensitive on the inside.

Considering her disdain for actors, the phrase "let's live together" might also indicate her longing for a community where egos and spotlight-hogging behavior are minimized, promoting a more supportive and cohesive environment in the theatrical world.

9. I think i already explained what i think of nicos crossword but ill explain again for you dimwits! (haha miu reference) it's very sarcastic and oddly worded, so i tried to make it less head ace inducing but heres my raw unfiltered analysis “even if i try to think, idk! (lmao)” i think its still david being sarcastic, and he’s referring to one specific moment, when nico tried to kill ace, davids telling him he didint think and that even if he did think he’d be too blinded by rage

#drdt #drdt spoilers #david cheim #drdt theory #drdt david

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morganas-pendragons · 2 years

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TWD 11.17 and 18

These are going to be brutally honest thoughts. I haven't done one of these in a while, and I haven't seen any generally good thoughts about these two episodes so here we go!

DID ANYONE NOTICE THEY ADDED TO THE TITLE CARDS AND THE THEME?

I don't have the slightest clue what happened at the beginning of Episode 17 but I am 100% here for Sleezy Hornsby getting shot by Daryl

Also, speaking of Sleezy -- His actor is A List, he's done a phenomenal job!

For any of you who keep repeatedly saying that Negan doesn't deserve a redemption arc... very kindly? You're wrong. He's had it, it was executed well, and I'm glad he's gotten a decent arc from Season 9 and 10 (I need to rewatch S11 in entirety before I can say it for this season too)

MERCER *insert drooling emoji here*

I kid you not I went "MOM" as soon as carol appeared on screen

AUNT CAROL?????? *CRIES*

Judith is so big it makes me want to die

I love that little character detail about Carol where she's always thinking three steps ahead of the antagonist for that particular season. It really speaks to her life experience how she's always prepared.

YA'LL COME AFTER JUDITH AND RJ AND YOU WILL BE CATCHING THESE HANDS

JDM is so good at the comedic aspect of Negan

I remember years ago that I desperately wanted to see JDM and MMB on screen together because of the dynamic between Carol and Negan -- and how drastically different they are from one another. THIS ONE DOESN'T DISAPPOINT EITHER

Episode 17 definitely gives me the vibes of if Woodbury had gone wrong, how would it have happened?

there's alot of nice callbacks to previous seasons/characters in this episode, which is really nice. I hope the series finale has this same kind of nostalgia.

also. Melissa? blue. her color. I will now associate every shade of blue with Melissa McBride, no questions asked.

I really, really hope Sebastian gets the crap kicked out of him by everyone

I love the candle light vigil and what it means because it makes sense. All these people find out that the Governor's son is responsible for the deaths of multiple civilians from the community, and they're enraged. They're furious and want blood and I don't blame them.

here's the really ironic part of this episode: it once again showed us that not even a community of 50k is safe inside of these walls because the walkers can still get through

AH, TEAR GAS AT A PEACEFUL EVENT. WONDER WHY THAT'S FAMILIAR?

oh lord all the Caryl scenes are in episode 18 I guess I'm staying up to watch both

This got a solid 7/10 and would've been lower if Judith and Carol weren't in it LOL

Episode 18

WHAT LITTLE GIRL IS DOING THESE VOICE OVERS????

Also first impressions: I find it hilariously stupid that Daryl is questioning Carol playing both sides when she's clearly done this like a million other times????

DARYL GETS TO ACTUALLY DROP THE F BOMB??? WOW

go off my guy Hornsby absolutely deserved getting stabbed through the hand with your MASSIVE knife

I really have an issue with the regression of Carol and Daryl's relationship. That opinion might get its own post.

"You take happiness wherever you can get it, and don't ever be sorry for it." Carol honey I love you but please take your own advice

I love how the camera pans directly to Daryl and Judith as SOON as she walks away from Lydia after saying this

DARYL!! HOLDING!!! RICKS!! GUN!!!!

catch me crying at the ''here it's yours'' BYE I MISS RICK SO MUCH

I think it's interesting how some of the side characters are beginning to find themselves again at Commonwealth and that molds their decision as to whether or not they'll stay or return to the Safe Zone.

Also for you guys who are vehemently against CZ: This scene isn't romantic and has zero romantic implications. After all that happened in S9, I cannot see a world where they'd make an effort to go through this again.

You can really tell Cailey Fleming has grown up from where we saw her in S9 to now. She's been a PHENOMENAL little Judith.

And speaking of Judith -- she really is the embodiment of everything Rick and Michonne stood for, and if she doesn't appear in his spin off to reunite with her father I WILL RIOT

uncle daryl and his little niece makes me weep

uhm.... okay this wrestling scene is.. uh... extremely corny

OH OKAY STEPHANIE AND EUGENE I SEE YOU

I FREAKING KNEW THE WALKERS WERE GOING TO GET IN WHEN FAKE STEPHANIE AND HER FRIEND KILLED THAT CREW WHY IS THIS SHOW SO PREDICTABLE

okay but highkey mercer might be the most attractive man in the commonwealth

THE WAY I CHEERED WHEN EUGENE THREW THAT WALKER AT SEBASTIAN GO OFF MY DUDE GO OFF

okay but imo his death might be the most gruesome/tragic one we've had in.. quite a while

this one was alot better then 17 because it again proves that not even a civilization of fifty thousand people is safe inside of these fortified walls where they get to pretend like the world didn't end and try to live the way they did before. I enjoyed this one much more thoroughly, but not enough Carol. 8/10!

bonus: why does episode 19 look better then 18 and 17 combined

#twd spoilers #twd #darylneedscarol #caryl

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wanderingrain · 1 year

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Blogging through Till the World Ends Episode 3

Every time they show me a wide shot of this apartment I can't help but think about TharnType. I'm sorry.

Ew what are the hets doing here? Also where is this gang holed up that they're still here?

Lol not them arguing over who gets to kill Art.

No it's 4am and the way I just screeched!! The fake blood! Golf just killed a man with a lichen knife. Why are you dropping the knife? Did Art just kill bubblegum girl? They've both gone feral!

At least Golf seems to be traumatized after killing someone now cause I thought for a minute we were gonna breeze right past that.

Major props to Art's actor for just straight up sobbing like that.

Once again Golf showing his obsessive tendencies. He's known this boy for three days and is unhealthily attached. I would normally wave it off as "just one of those tv show things" but they said he only knew his girlfriend for a week and was overpossessive of her too. Seems like a pattern to me.

I hope you're gonna turn more lights on before you try and stitch him up.

Nope we're doing this in the semi-dark.

Art's face I can't

Babes you can barely handle him touching the wound with a cotton ball and you're asking him to sew it up? You know you're gonna need to hold still for that right? Maybe we should break out the drinking alcohol.

Wow i really don't need these sound effects thanks.

Oh good it's over.

Wait shower? After you just got stitches? Wait.

Wow this bed is huge.

Golf already looks so in love. I love how Art is clutching the blanket to his chest lol

ugh I'm so soft for hand holding. I love how quietly they're talking. I love how the camera doesn't want to focus on them lol

Babes this is the second time he's called you cute actually.

The way Art looks so scandalized from being called cute!

Oh so it's more than just a 2 person pattern.

I love that Art is just casually playing with Golf's fingers as they talk. We need more casual touches like this where the touch isn't the focal point of the scene.

Not the instrumental Christmas music again! Why Thailand why?

The way Art's hand is fully resting over Golf's now while he's trying to comfort him. The way they didn't make a big deal about it and they're just allowed to touch each other casually.

Both of these boys are good actors. The emotion, the body language. Good job boys.

I'm not sure I believe Art would really leave the apartment again after what just happened but I'm willing to suspend my disbelief.

🤣🤣🤣 Not Bubblegum gang girl still laying on the ground! Guess she's alive then. Didn't expect to be getting her pov.

Shut up Art! Do you want to alert Bubblegum to your presence? If you get taken hostage by the same girl twice in 24 hours I swear...

Ohhh is he about to remember? Nope nevermind.

Oh good Bubblegum's got his wallet.

Breakfast on the- why would you leave the apartment? How do you know the roof is safe? Ya'll literally almost died less than 12 hours ago in this apartment complex and now you want to go up to the roof?! Are you inane?

WOAH OK that's a lot

Anybody else feel weird about bubblegum touching him when he's still all sweaty from sex?

Is he not a new recruit after all? Then why were they trying to pressure him into killing someone in the beginning?

Honestly this gang doesn't scare me so I don't really feel much about them having Golf's picture. Lol.

If Golf and Art would just stay locked up in the apartment the gang would probably never find them unless they went door to door kicking in doors. So I'm sure some sort of shenanigans will ensue to make sure our main characters are dumb enough to expose themselves. I'm betting that Art remembers what happened and tries to run away for the third time and gets caught by bubblegum and she uses him to lure Golf out.

I still think one of the gang members is probably Art's brother because that's usually how these things work. Or maybe Golf's brother has something to do with the gang. Either way I'm sure they'll be saved by some kind of brotherly intervention.

On to episode 4

#Till the World Ends #Episode 3 #I really thought the 18+ rating was for the onscreen death #Imagine my surprise #Really lured my Ace self into a false sense of security there #I will be more mentally prepared next time #You don't get the jump on me next time show #WanderingRain

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rocksrntpeople · 1 year

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MCU Rewatch The Avengers

My immediate impression of The Avengers is, “Wow! What a let down!” This was like episode 22/24 of every season of trash shonen, just recap and filler the whole way through.

Obviously, there are some really cool parts that show off our favorite characters, but even from the get-go it’s so fucking edge-lord. It’s like the creative team had been building up to this great crossover while the financial team had been building up to mass appeal and now they were like, “FINALLY we can capture the rest of the market with what people really want: over-the-top action and clashing personalities. That’s all superhero stories are, right?”

I mean, Loki is so upset about his loss that he’s twisted the events to make it seem like he was wronged?

Give me a break; no you were not! Overall, this hit-the-ground-running start would’ve been better executed if they had been bolder. Right off the bat, two major players are taken off the board. Too bad we’ve barely seen anything of them and don’t give a crap about them. Hawkeye, who literally is not called this throughout the entire movie and is a fully-fledged Avenger, and Erik Selvig, the scientist from Thor who wasn’t as hot or young as the other two scientists and thus got way less screen time during that movie (not much here either).

So they were too scared to remove real players from the board or have the threat do something reasonable. I mean, what is with this plan anyway? It makes no sense! Why does Loki need the Chitauri to steal the Tesseract and take over Earth if he can just mind control whoever he wants on Earth? Are you seriously telling me that Loki, god of mischief, can’t find a way to steal something from humans unless he tricks humans using something other than his powers of trickery?

He absolutely needs this magic space stick to do this, even though humans are one of the weakest species around? And then, if he succeeds, he’ll rule over a planet that got flattened and then occupied by the Chitauri, surrounded by darkness like the preteen emo he’s imitating? Then what? What’s the plan? Worst of all, he keeps making Hawkeye do that thing with the bow that got put in by some blowhard convinced that it was the only way to get women in the theater.

Why does he do it 2/3 times he gets the bow out? And why doesn’t he then use the bow?? That’s right, both freaking times he does this stupid move, there is NO ARROW SHOOTING AFTERWARDS.

And then we get to Cap and begin getting plot whiplash as they bounce around to introduce characters. Apparently they didn’t learn anything from the Hulk movie because we’re once again inundated with flashing images like Malcolm McDowell, hoping to god the person next to us doesn’t have any questions about the origin story for one character in a movie with fucking 5 other movies as the setup.

Between screenshots and gifs, we see he’s just beating the shit out of sandbags, all sad and lonely because he’s a man out of time. Why the hell did they cut Ashley Johnson’s part?

That really helped cement his feelings of being out of place, isolated, and ultimately betrayed by the universe in response to his sacrifice. Actually, all I could think about during the sandbag scene was, “Jesus, this guy loses pretty much everyone he knows twice.” I hadn’t considered that when I first watched Endgame, but he’s holding people together because he’s kind of already been through this before.

Luckily (or something), this kind of introduction begins and ends with Captain America. Iron Man and Black Widow get pretty normal introductions that work well for their characters and show off their “thing” — Black Widow being a hot, smarmy badass and Tony Stark being a hot, smarmy, rich badass.

Finally the Hulk is pulled in. Oh he’s so scary, but he’s just a normal guy really! That’s why they sent the hot woman in, to lure him. But he’s also smart, so he doesn’t fall for that! But he’s also super dangerous; do you see how scared the badass woman is, even though she wasn’t scared before? Wow, better watch out for this guy! He’s probably like the most dangerous one of the group!

Okay, that was a little too scary. Better just skip the hulk for now…and most of the rest of the movie.

Things do get a lot better once they’re all together on the airship. Oh yeah, Thor shows up.

Anyways, now they’re all together on an airship for really no reason other than airships are cool as fuck. Because realistically, an airship is just about the worst fucking place to be if you’re a flightless species starting a war against space aliens with way better tech that can definitely take down the airship.

There’s a good half hour here of character development that’s basically the best part of the movie. Tony Stark and Bruce Banner commiserate over science, Captain America gains a bit of appreciation for the fact that he’s the only real soldier among them, Black Widow considers the idea that not everyone around her is an idiot…oh, and we’re introduced to the shadow clan who controls everything on this planet and surely aren’t evil even though they are barely willing to show their faces during a private convo with a top employee.

Oh, you thought Nick Fury was the questionable-nice-guy-who-is-actually-really-evil? No, he’s just black and not in a rom-com. He’s actually super nice and considerate of the feelings of all the Avengers; it’s just that most of the time he has to be all business and can’t be nice.

Except that he’s not when you move away from this movie! What the fuck does he do immediately after this? Takes Coulson’s body and reanimates it using alien blood, torture, and brainwashing. He is a questionable guy at best! But that’s the secret military, baby! Show us that stuff!!

Eventually in the MCU they do show us this, and I get all this shit that they did to create mass appeal. It works, it’s well executed, and it’s easy to do. However, good god how could they??

I remembered this movie as having been a bit weak, but I had no reason for it. Now I remember why; hardly anything happens! ALL of the main action happens within the last 30 minutes of the movie, including however long the credits are. Yes, there’s an action scene at a museum in the beginning and a few others mixed in, but other than these spare few minutes of action we see almost nothing of the threat to Earth. And then this big, bad threat is defeated in less than 30 minutes.

Yes, it’s a longer amount of time in-world, but still it’s just crazy to me that the main hook of the story really only consumes about 45 minutes of the movie. Literally even the characters forget what the hell they’re doing, being reminded about Loki after the main battle.

This movie was okay and even though lots of people love it, I have to give it a paltry 5 out of 10. You could walk into this movie knowing almost nothing about the MCU and have a good time.That’s damning for a series of movies. It’s an unpopular opinion, but I just don’t think that somebody should be able to walk into movie number 6 of a series and just be totally with it, get everything, and not have to think about what’s happening too much. That completely defeats the point of a damn series.

Iron Man 3 is next up. Ugh. I hate this one, specifically because of the damn kid and the idea that having a kid around is the only way to be motivated enough to think about the future and consider improving it.

But okay, let’s see how it goes. After this, I think the movies get a lot better up until Endgame. They start to give up on building the audience further and instead focus on keeping the audience after the poor reception of Iron Man 3. (I’m not alone in my negativity this time!)

#marvel #mcu #mcu rewatch #avengers 1 #avengers #thor #captain america #black widow #hawkeye #clint barton #hulk #bruce banner #iron man 3

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adultswim2021 · 1 year

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12 oz. Mouse #18: “Pre-Reckoning” | December 4, 2006 – 12:45AM | S02E11

I think I will try to do a thing with this one, where I get stoned (I just happen to be stoned, I mean) and try very hard to recall the “plot” of this one rather than going scene by scene like usual. Actually, no, that’s a bad idea. Forget I said anything.

Okay, so for whatever reason I remember this opening scene being the beginning of PART 2 of the 12 Oz Mouse “MOVIE”, because I think they didn’t want to sacrifice picture quality by having the entire nearly four-hour thing be on a single DVD. Either that or Warner Bros. had some kind of technical standards and practices that would not let them compress that much video onto a single DVD disc. I am starting to feel slightly sad that I sold that thing, you know. Anyway, what I’m pointing out here is that they didn’t split the movie into two more equal parts, rather they put as much as they could on DISC 1 and then put what couldn’t fit onto disc 2 along with extra features. It is a great DVD, and I respect it, despite having sold it. I will probably be seeking out a copy of the film where both parts are joined together so you don’t have to take a break from it and watch that later.

Shark is blowing everything up, remember? This episode reminds you of that. I am going to take a moment to appreciate how the show constantly reiterates what is happening. It’s the nature of being serialized, but it also aids and abets the sometimes disjointed speech and thought patterns that almost every character on this show has. It helps. It doesn’t hurt.

Shark is blowing everything up. Liquor is commenting on it. This is all unnecessarily complicated when you get right down to it: they are transporting a former “producer man” (who goes around talking like a movie producer in a lightly-satirical kid’s cartoon) to a guy named Roostre, who has only one hand and can not access a flying corndog-shaped mech that he needs to use to combat a monster that has been awakened by a Shark and his various cohorts. They are transporting the former producer man to Roostre so that they can cut his head open to retrieve his missing hand, which crawled inside the former movie producer’s head on it’s own accord in order to control his brain and make him find Mouse who has an inherited stash of weapons strong enough to ensure safety during what seems like a hellish armageddon. Mouse and his many guns help producer man find Roostre, who does cut his head open and does get the hand.

Okay, I said I was kidding about trying to recall the plot to this episode while high and after a few hours of having watched it, without carefully rewatching it, but that’s basically it. That’s what happened. I was trying to recap the previous episodes to give you more context for when I actually recapped the current episode, but then I recapped the current episode. I’m gonna rewatch it because I was going too anyway. I probably forgot some stuff.

Okay, so another thing about this episode is that the language is “going out,” which would logically mean that their reality is a program or something, and assets are shorting out because it’s overheating or something. We see more of the bad guys. We see peanut cop glitching out. We see the gas from the gas-giving clock being pumped into the city. Shark is in a control room making all this happen. Shark talks about time. He implies that he is playing with time somehow. It seems like he’s talking to an unseen entity whose eye guy is their avatar, through said avatar. The clicky robots we saw hatching are swarming the city, helping to destroy everything. We see a truck labeled “PORNO” overturn. One of them is drilling into the sex doll from episode one. That porno, what a proud industry.

Mouse says he’s going to save his friends. Liquor tells Mouse they are probably dead by now. It does seem very hopeless out there.

The big scary monster that was unleashed is now smelling a flower, and Shark observes that if that flower reaches the right person “we’re all dead.” Okay it seems like what’s happening is that Shark is an avatar of somebody else in another plane of existence and that the avatar itself developed an ego to the extent that it created a new reality around itself that is overriding the psyche’s of somebody in suspended animation or something, and has overpowered some computer program meant to run in a different fashion. Right? I mean, I’m saying this as a person who watched the entire show once and forgot most of it. I’m not trying to spoil it, but I’m betting on it not really mattering, so I’m speculating openly on what I already sorta-but-not-really knows what happens.

Mouse has a shootout with some of the robots and then finds peanut cop in a clock shop. He fashioned a gas mask that makes it so he can speak clearly, unaffected by the language outage around them. They have a conversation and decide they need to kill Shark, immediately.

Liquor gives Roostre his (meaning Roostre’s) hand. He also encourages Spider to eat producer man, implying that producer man has perished for the cause, and that Spider is considerate enough to entertain the idea of not eating him for respect reasons. “That is some good juice” Liquor says, which I like to think means that somehow Spider and Willie Nelson from Aqua Teen Hunger Force are the same entity, perhaps on different planes, being generated by the same user. Hey, it could happen, McWorld. It’s like how the Dark Tower is in Stephen King, right? And by “in Stephen King” I mean, “in Stephen King books”. I don’t actually read books. Sorry, people with bumper stickers that are performatively mad at people for not reading books as much as they do.

I pet a dog today :) sorry, I was just thinking about that dog!! Extremely nice. Belonged to a rich family. I think he got out by mistake and was patiently waiting for his master to get home. Covered in mud, but seemed content. Enormously well-behaved. A good guy all around. I’ve been to this house before for work reasons and he’s usually inside or in the backyard, and when he’s in the backyard he always walks up to the fence with a toy in it’s mouth, like he largely associates human beings as guys to play with. I love the idea of a dog thinking this way.

Anyway, we are about to see the Corndog-shaped mech get activated because now Roostre has his hand back and can open the panel to let him get inside and use it. To combat stuff.

The end!

MAIL BAG

Did you ever see the Rolling Stone cover featuring Bill Murray on the sand and getting some sun and the title was "Bill Murray: Hits The Beach"? Considering what we know now about him (or have known at least) shouldn't it have been "Bill Murray: Hits The Bitch"?

What are you, nuts? (posts picture of that issue that I own)

#adult swim #adultswim2021 #12 oz. mouse

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miraculouscontent · 3 years

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It’s heeeeere! Another summasalt, this time with nearly twice the length of the first one!

(Turns out that not having caffeine doesn’t help me talk any slower.)

Script below:

Anonymous asked:

Thoughts on Rocketear?

Can you Rocketear the newest episode apart with your salt, my beloved Salt Queen?

Penny for your thoughts on Rocketear?

Aw, anon! You can have that for free! I'm a generous goddess.

"Rocketear" begins with Chat Noir and Carapace - just Carapace, really - holding back a pack of what I presume to be the physical manifestation of the writing staff's age, or at least a representation of how behind the times the writing seems.

Just as the dinosaurs break through Shellter. Ladybug shows up with the scientist who revived the dinosaurs in the first place and said scientist uses a whistle to calm the dinosaurs down. There's also a line from Bob Roth about putting the dinosaurs in a theme park to make money and I know what it's referencing but it's so incredibly random that it doesn't really come off as a proper joke.

Carapace was notably sad right after battle, but insisted that he was fine when Ladybug asked. Rena, sporting a... - I would like to say "new design" but it's a recolor in every sense of the word - is hiding behind part of a building and smiles after the heroes before walking off. Ladybug takes Nino's miraculous back but sees that he's still upset and asks him again what's wrong. Nino asks where Alya was and Ladybug claims that she only needed Carapace for the job, which cheers him up but only until Ladybug is already gone.

Mm, I guess Nino and Adrien relate in heroism not being enough for them unless they have their respective love interest to flirt with.

Also, I know this is an obvious set-up, but the show can't tell me that Ladybug just always brought Nino and Alya whenever she needed one of them. Season 3 required her to go to Master Fu to get the miraculouses, and unless she already knew that Nino and Alya would be in the same location - which, okay, the show does basically shove the two of them together whenever Nino is onscreen, fair, if two characters are in a relationship in this show then it's weird for them to NOT be with that person - but it just seems like a gamble, not to mention proof to Shadow Moth that the two are close if Ladybug constantly brings both of them.

Anyway, Ladybug goes into the sewer and asks Rena if she's seen any sign of Shadow Moth or his traps. Rena didn't see anything and they de-transform. Marinette is about to leave when she thinks of something, but Alya assumes it's about her new look, which was apparently not voluntary on her part and the suit automatically adapted to Alya's new role as Rena Furtive, which she has now named it as.

Marinette reminds her that this is supposed to be a secret and that they agreed that the fox has no owner. When Alya is evasive about whether she told Nino that she won't be Rena anymore, Marinette stresses that everyone needs to believe that Alya won't be using a miraculous anymore so that she can remain an undercover spy.

What's the point in changing the look if you're not going to show yourself anyway? I mean, insurance, I guess, but still.

Alya, exasperated, parrots what Marinette has apparently told her before: that she helps Ladybug with Mirage in case Shadow Moth tries to follow her so Rena can follow him instead. Marinette stresses the situation again and Alya tries to get Marinette to agree on her telling Nino that she's Rena Furtive, but Marinette refuses.

At Marinette's house, Alya talks further and explains that she doesn't know if she can lie to Nino since they don't keep any secrets--Alya, babe, you kept Rena Rouge from him and didn't tell him that you knew he was Carapace until Ladybug was forced to give you your miraculouses at the same time. I don't wanna hear it.

Marinette states that it's too late for that and also not technically a lie, but Alya gets upset and says that Nino will never trust her again if he finds out that she kept something from him. Marinette brings up how she had to keep secrets from Alya too, but they're interrupted by Tom appearing and wanting to play games with them. Marinette makes an excuse about homework that she's repeated many times, as Tom comments that the teachers give her too much. After Tom is kicked out - hang on, lemme just... - Marinette uses the moment to show Alya that she's lied to her family a lot and hasn't played games with her father in months. She states that there's no other option as they have to protect their identities, and Alya agrees to talk to Nino.

In Alya's room - I just presume at this point that Nino's house doesn't exist and Chris is an illusion - Alya tells Nino that they need to talk, but stammers and states that it's hard to talk about. Nino thinks that she wants to break up with him, but Alya assures that she loves him. She finally gets to the cover story that Rena herself made up in "Sentibubbler" and Nino understands, sad that she won't be around anymore but agreeing if it's what Ladybug thinks is best.

Is it weird that Nino respects Ladybug's wishes more than Alya does?

Nino hugs her and is confused by why Alya was nervous to tell him, as she can tell him anything and nothing will change their relationship. Alya feels guilty and hugs back, murmuring about how they don't have any secrets; that's not what Nino said, but sure, push this plot to its already predictable conclusion. I mean, I thought it was vaguely sweet that Nino switched to seriousness immediately when Alya said that she wanted to talk, but how am I supposed to be invested in this couple when their dynamic boils down to "STRONG, INDEPENDANT WOMAN who wears the pants in the relationship because her boyfriend is portrayed as a wimpy coward"? Like, the show constantly dragged Nino down to make Alya look "powerful" by comparison, and then when it comes to characters like Marinette, we get a girl who works very well outside of her relationship with her endgame love interest.

It's the fakest form of "girl power," dragging guys down to raise girls up or actually making a strong girl character but having her love interest be a weakness that creates flaws in her that weren't there originally and having that love interest be who she's "destined for."

I'm rambling, sorry.

In class, Marinette assures Alya that she did the right thing and Alya agrees. As they're leaving school, Marinette talks about how their "night walks" start soon, and Alya non-subtly talks about how Rena Furtive will be on the lookout while Ladybug and Chat Noir patrol. She stops, however, as gets excited about some pictures she took of herself as Rena Furtive, which has a lot of details that Marinette hasn't seen. I don't know whether to groan at what I just heard or remind everyone that Rena Furtive is literally just a recolor and therefore this is the writers patting themselves on the back for this design, so let's just move on.

Alya then shows Marinette her phone--AUGH, MY EYES--and suggests making a poll on her Ladyblog so people can vote for their favorite Rena design. Marinette has to stress again that Rena Furtive is supposed to be a spy and thus invisible, which Alya admits that she forgot about.

Okay, I've been holding off on talking about this, but now seems like the best time to bring it up. Alya has been a trash friend as well as a trash confidant, and her role as Rena Rouge boiled down to, "it was convenient for her to be the fox at the time it was needed." She's not particularly stealthy like one would expect of a fox, and she was easily one of the worst candidates to be told Marinette's big secret. I'll get more into this later, but I have to stress that Alya has treated Marinette no differently since learning of Marinette's identity and has already gone against Marinette's orders once before at the time of this episode airing. Episodes are constantly torn between validating their decision to have Marinette tell Alya, having Marinette be worried about the decision while the show considers her to be ridiculous for it, and then having Alya either consider or make choices that clearly don't gel well with what's good for her role. Much like Marinette, she lacks a sense of self-control and--wow, a female character who's impulsive, never seen that stereotype before.

Point being, "Sentibubbler" stressed over and over that Alya was the right choice and deserved to be both the permanent fox and the understudy for guardian, but then we have "Rocketear" here where Alya is making basic emotionally-driven errors that I'm not even remotely sympathetic to when Marinette has gone through so much worse over the course of three+ seasons.

*sigh*

Alya laments that it's hard to find new content for the Ladyblog - ah, yes, tell me more about your struggles, Alya - but figures that at least she can post stuff about Chat Noir instead of--I don't know--making fake Ladybug theories to lead people off Marinette's trail. Marinette says that it's a great idea, though Alya still doesn't look too happy. The scene then rewinds to a little bit to show a different point of view, this time with Adrien and Nino. Wait, this feels familiar, wasn't there another episode that did something like--ohhhh no, this is going to hurt.

After saying good-bye to Adrien - something I wish I could do every time he's mentioned or on-screen - Nino catches the bit of conversation where Alya talks about the Ladyblog. Nino talks as if Marinette isn't there and asks Alya out to the movies because Marinette is chopped liver and this is about Alya and how sad she is, guys.

Wow, she's turning into Adrien faster and faster.

Alya hesitates, but Marinette assures her that there's still time. Alya excitedly runs off with Nino and they watch what I presume are previews given the narrator, featuring recycled footage from the Ladybug PV. Nino is upset because Rena is mentioned but not Carapace, and the preview features Rena telling Chat Noir to forget Ladybug because it's Chat and Rena herself who are trulu made for each other.

I don't know what's funnier; the complete lack of self-awareness or the suggestion that a biracial couple would exist in this show outside of a special that gives them maybe a minute of screentime and acts more like suggestive canon anyway. I think I might've been too generous with that line about dinosaurs.

Nino is offended by the preview and Alya brushes off his comments, stating that it's just a cartoon and it's made to entertain people, though Nino himself is certainly not entertained. Can't say I entirely blame him considering that Alya doesn't really try to say anything substantial or even agree with him. No cuddling or reassuring kisses, she just gets slightly sad and turns to her phone for a bit.

After the movie, Nino is cheered back up again until he catches Alya on her phone once more. He offers to take her home, but she's distracted, and he comments that what she showed to Marinette looked pretty nice; I don't know because they didn't show it. Nino asks what it was and Alya evades the question, stating that her battery is running out. Nino is suspicious, but spots Andre's ice cream cart and the two head over there. Andre calls them his favorite couple and asks what they want, but Alya sees Ladybug gesturing for her and has to run off, giving Nino a cheek kiss as she goes which feels like too little too late at this point.

Nino catches some conveniently-placed kids arguing over who Chat Noir loves, but they settle on the fact that girls in general love Chat Noir. Nino is then seen at the Seine watching the Ladyblog's latest video, where Alya is talking up how amazing Chat Noir is. I hate to stop every five seconds to complain - okay, actually I don't - but I presume this video must've been made after the movie since Nino seems like the type who would actively follow his girlfriend's blog, yet not only is this video perfectly set up to echo the kids and the movie preview, but Alya - despite apparently caring about her boyfriend soooo much that she kept trying to convince Marinette to bend the rules - didn't even try to warn Nino or text him so he doesn't take it too seriously. It's like "Sentibubbler" with the conflicting messages about identity rules; Alya cares about her boyfriend but both isn't thinking about how he'll take the things she says and apparently doesn't know him well enough to realize that he wouldn't be mad over her keeping a secret that she was told to keep. I already talked about how they play up Nino to be the emotionally weaker one of the relationship, but then they don't have Alya try to cover or make up for that. She's been acting very much not like Alya - you know, the one who in "Sapotis" practically bragged about how great she'd be at covering for Ladybug - with her stutters and weak excuses, so I can't completely blame Nino for being upset after everything that's happened when he sees the writers projecting onto Alya as she talks about how Chat Noir is brave and funny and cute and showing all these images of him as well. I don't agree with all of his actions, but--oh yeah, speaking of which--

Nino calls Adrien and is talking to him about how Alya must be in love with someone else. Adrien dismisses the idea, as Alya and Nino are together basically all the time, and asks who she could possibly be in love with. When Nino suggests that it's Chat Noir, Adrien laughs and jokes about it being Fang instead. Nino points out the video but Adrien did see it but is overall unphased and convinced that it means nothing. Nino says that he'll find proof and hangs up, but Adrien is certain he'll find nothing. Plagg comments that Nino will find someone because Plagg's charisma has definitely contaminated Adrien.

Ugh.

Adrien expresses concern that he put on the cat's charm too much and accidentally made Alya fall for him, and decides to visit Alya as Chat Noir to be sure.

Meanwhile, we get a reference to film noirs as Nino narrates. That's the second blatant reference this episode and now I feel like they wrote this script while doing a movie marathon.

Chat Noir arrives at Alya's house and Trixx hides before Alya opens the curtains to reveal her surprise guest. Nino is nearby watching the scene with his phone as Alya wonders aloud if something's wrong. Chat assures that everything's fine, but brings up the video she posted. He insists that it made him happy, but points out that she's been following him and Ladybug since the beginning and that they know each other much better due to everything that's happened. He has some conveniently-worded dialog as he starts to say that he hopes something's just an illusion and Alya gets worried that he's about to bring up Rena. Chat continues and clarifies that he wonders if she started to feel something for him, though adds that he understands because just look at him.

UGGGGH.

Chat clarifies by making a heart with his hands, which Nino sees. Alya laughs at this gesture and states that she has a boyfriend, doing the same heart gesture and suggesting that her love for Nino is even more than that. Chat Noir apologizes - hm, I didn't know he had the capacity to do that - and hugs Alya, saying that he was just confused.

An absolutely unnecessary hug for two people who, at least in terms of their current selves, have had very little screentime together, but this is also the show where making eye contact basically means your friends and it's all just to push the plot along so Nino inteprets that Alya is in love with Chat Noir, so whatever I guess.

Alya states that Nino is far more irresistable than Chat, then adds that she doesn't even know his secret identity, and she'd never fall in love with someone she doesn't know. Nino then runs away upset and the scene cuts away to the next day where--

Wait, wait, wait, hang on a second. Two things right off the bat there.

First off, we're just gonna sidle past that "wouldn't fall in love with someone you don't know the identity of" while ignoring the existence of the love square? Not even Chat thinking about how he doesn't know Ladybug's identity and trying to excuse that he doesn't have to? This guy is that certain of their relationship?

Secondly, Nino is practically sobbing and Shadow Moth doesn't take this as his opportunity? Same guy who akumatized Mr. Pigeon 72 times and has akumatized Gigantitan more than once? What is this pacing???

But--alright, so Adrien comes into school and sees Nino, still dressed up in his detective gear, which gets ignored completely as Adrien goes to tell him about Chat Noir and Alya. Because the show doesn't know how Adrien would convey this within reason, Nino interrupts him, taking him down into the lower part of the school where he has a desk and chairs set up. Adrien goes to ask when Nino had time to do this, but Nino slams his hand on the desk to cut him off. Nino presents the evidence he took and they go back and forth, likewise with Adrien turning off the background music while Nino turns it back on. Adrien insists that it's a misunderstanding, but pleads innocent when Nino asks how he knows. Adrien states that Alya is just a superhero fan and that she and Chat Noir have nothing in common.

Again, the complete lack of self-awareness is astonishing.

Adrien repeats what Alya said about secret identities and how she wouldn't fall for someone she doesn't know - they're really ignoring this, aren't they? - and continues hitting Nino's soft spots about how unlikely it is until Nino decides to tell Adrien something he's not supposed to.

He tells Adrien, not only that Alya is Rena Rouge, but that he's Carapace. Adrien goes through a range of emotions beyond sAD for once, shocked at the fact that they know each other's identities. Nino states that they don't keep secrets from each other, except now Alya is with Chat Noir. Adrien still doesn't understand and brings up how secret identities have to be protected, or else Nino wouldn't have told him because Ladybug wouldn't agree to it.

Oh, here we go. So that's why they waited.

Nino states that it was Ladybug herself who gave them their miraculouses at the same time; not giving the reason why, of course, nor pointing out that they're temporary heroes so there's understandably some leeway. Adrien is having a moment, but manages to bring the subject back to Alya and Chat Noir, who he still doesn't think are a thing. Nino argues that it's because Adrien doesn't know Chat Noir, but he does because he's Carapace and knows how Chat Noir acts. He says that it's all flowers and confessions when Ladybug appears, but he gets rejected because Ladybug thinks that he's annoying, and she's right. He adds that Chat flirts with Rena Rouge and that's all that needs to happen, with Chat stepping in on the first mission Carapace lost in. Nino laments the loss of the love of his life and wishes to shut Chat Noir up forever; we all do, Nino, we all do. Shadow Moth finally steps in with - oh, less than eight minutes left in the episode, yikes - and Nino is akumatized into Rocketear.

Rocketear rejects Adrien's pleas to stop, insisting that Chat Noir is who he's after, not Adrien, and Adrien transforms in sad fashion despite Plagg's reminder of who Rocketear is after. Alya, meanwhile, is in the art club with Marinette - wait, since when was Alya in the art club - telling Marinette about how Chat Noir thought she was into him due to the video, which Marinette groans at. There's an earthquake and they peek outside to see Rocketear firing his tears at Chat Noir, shouting that he stole Alya from him. Chat Noir tries to tell him otherwise, but Rocketear won't listen.

Alya groans at Nino doing this, then she and Marinette set off to find a place to transform. They conveniently go to the same place Adrien and Nino were, so they see the desk that Nino had set up.

Genuine question, how seriously does this episode want me to take itself, because now when I recount all the unnecessary love square drama in my head - because you know that's where this is going - I'm going to have to think, "Nino, dressed in a detective outfit, ripped off his fake mustache and told Adrien both his and Rena's identities, and also that Ladybug was totally cool with it and thinks that Chat Noir is annoying."

Gettin' two completely different vibes here. The episode clearly wants to be important but it doesn't take itself seriously either, which it totally could while including enough jokes to keep things light. Instead, I'm just left scratching my head and wondering what tone they're going for.

Marinette finds Nino's phone on the desk - I'm calling continuity error on that one because he at no point put it on the desk, at least not on-screen - and she questions Alya on the video she sees. Alya insists that nothing happened, apparently completely unphased by her boyfriend having spied on her, and says that he wouldn't have misunderstood if he'd heard the actual conversation.

The two transform and Ladybug immediately uses Lucky Charm, receiving a projector. Ladybug is clueless and Rena Furtive suggests creating an imaginary movie like Nino. Ladybug gets an idea, remembering Alya's earlier comments, and Rena confirms that she remembers every word of it.

Aaaaand, just like that, all of the tension has been completely sucked away. You know, "Backwarder" was a trash episode, but at least when Ladybug was showing every step of her plan, she didn't tell us what it was.

Meanwhile, Rocketear and Chat Noir are still arguing--I started zoning out at hearing the same thing over and over again at this point, so I just presume they were fighting over who does stuff behind their love interest's backs better; I don't think they came to an agreement but they're both losers anyway.

Chat Noir says that he'll prove his innocence, tossing his baton aside to show him giving up, but Rocketear points out that it proves nothing and strikes Chat Noir with his tears.

Our endgame love interest, everyone. Straight As yet about as smart as a sack of bricks, and that at least won't flirt with anyone non-consensually.

Chat Noir makes a point that he doesn't want to hurt Rocketear, and Shadow Moth tells Rocketear to take his miraculous before finishing him. Chat Noir can only weakly tell him not to before Ladybug snags Rocketear's wrist and diverts the shot. Ladybug explains to Rocketear about the projector and how it'll let him hear the audio of the recording he took. She adds that she doesn't know what Chat said, but she trusts him.

Marinette, I'm sorry, I feel so bad for you.

Ladybug turns on the projector and Rocketear relaxes at actually hearing what was going on. Rena then de-transforms and hurries out to meet with Rocketear, hugging him as Rocketear apologizes for doubting her. Alya also kinda sorta apologizes in a way I don't understand and Rocketear then breaks his akumatization, very casually, all on his own.

Yeah, just--casually, in a matter of seconds in fact. You know, it's really sad when people resisting akumatizations are more tense and emotionally compelling than them breaking them. This is twice in one season now and has zero impact considering that Nino's reason for being akumatized was already taken care of so he had no reason to stay akumatized anyway. Him breaking his own object to release the akuma would've at least been different, but instead it's just a repeat of what Alya went through with even less tension considering that Alya's wasn't even that good in the first place, relying on her relationship to Ladybug rather than who she knew to be her best friend.

Moving on, Ladybug captures the akuma and uses Miraculous Ladybug to bring everything back to normal. Shadow Moth monologues about how love and secrets don't go well together and he's sure that she has a lot and I'll talk about this later.

Ladybug hands over the magical charm, which Nino takes but insists that he won't need it, as he'll never let Shadow Moth use his love to manipulate him again. Plenty of other things to get akumatized over, but they gave the supposedly ace character a robot to help him stick out and also gave the supposedly aro character a miraculous back in season one to give her more importance. If characters aren't in love then they need something to ceompensate for it.

Nino apologizes to Chat Noir for being wrong and Chat Noir assures him that everyone has doubts, even him. He gets sad and Ladybug asks him what's wrong, but he insists that he's fine - officially throwing away his right to be upset at her later as far as I'm concerned - and they do their usual fist buuuuu--

...Really?

Everyone then splits up and Chat Noir sulks by himself instead of--you know, talking to Ladybug, or asking her anything, or making any sort of excuse for her because that would mean he actually has faith in her and understands that their partnership is different from temporary heroes, even if the excuse was as basic as her wanting to protect him more than the others because he would be that egotistical if they didn't want to stretch out this unnecessary drama.

Later on, Adrien is staring at a picture on the Ladyblog that might be a metaphor for the show considering how "in the foreground" Chat Noir and Rena are.

Adrien vents about Ladybug giving miraculouses to Alya and Nino, but Plagg states that she's the guardian. Adrien clarifies that he's referring to Alya and Nino knowing each other's identities, but Plagg doesn't see the issue. Adrien gets huffy and asks why the rule exists for LadyNoir but not Ninya, but Plagg again points out that she's the guardian, so she makes the rules, though obviously he uses cheese metaphors to convey it.

Okay, Plagg is only, like--half-right because he doesn't have all the information. If you don't mind me rambling for a bit, I'm on the fence here because, on one hand--yes, I agree that Marinette should be allowed to make her own rules, and I often do that in my writing because I think she should be permitted leeway in order to let herself be happy, but on the other hand, it's not technically her rule, as she had to let Alya and Nino in on their identities back in the Season 2 finale, so Fu was still around for a season. She wasn't even guardian yet!

Now, presumably so the fandom could blame Marinette if anything happened, Marinette never discussed this with Fu on-screen, so I can't say whether or not Fu knew, but I feel like he must've since Marinette had to have told him the heroes' identities off-screen, given "Party Crasher," and thus I imagine that Marinette would tell Fu everything that happened, which is consistent with what she does on-screen even if she'd keep things from him for a little while.

"Furious Fu" had also established that not even Master Fu followed rules completely, meaning that Marinette is in this awkward spot of mostly following what Fu taught her, which aren't all guardian rules anyway, and having to break the rules on occasion for various purposes. I can't say what Fu approved of and what he didn't, because episodes spend so much time on the love square that they forget about Marinette as a person and how she interacts with everyone else. From an emotional standpoint, I can't blame Marinette for not revoking the miraculouses of people whose identities get discovered because of her, as I imagine she feels guilty and it probably doesn't seem fair to force them into another miraculous or have them be entirely without one because of a mistake that she made, meaning that someone needs to be throwing a lot of red flags for Marinette to be through with them.

Though obviously, from the show's standpoint, it's just an excuse to not make new models, but I complained about that enough in "Sentibubbler" and this episode even went out of its way to design a detective model for Nino while spraypainting Alya's bodysuit in the same breath, so this is the world we live in.

Anyway, Marinette is essentially in this position where she still has Fu's rules hovering over her, but she's also trying to step out on her own and make her own decisions to varying degrees of success or failure depending on your point of view. Tikki--wait, no, bad idea--Su-Han then, could easily give input on these things, perhaps with Marinette discussing a modern day set of rules for someone her age and going back and forth with Su-Han on what the right choices to make are, finding something that's comfortable but within a realm of predictable control. Su-Han was okay with some rules being broken after seeing how Ladybug handled them and they could've easily made this episode about that instead, but instead, we get rules being set and then being broken on a writer's whim.

Which now brings us to the end of the episode, where Marinette is on the phone with Alya and apologizes for causing trouble between her and Nino. Alya tells her not to worry and she'll fix things - you know, those things that, to Marinette's knowledge, have already been fixed - and asks if Marinette trusts her. Marinette does, and Alya hangs up in order to face Nino.

Yeah, that feeling of dread in your stomach? That means you know how predictable the writing is and what's about to happen, good for you.

Alya explains that she has to tell Nino something and he's worried, this time trying to sheepishly break the tension. She explains that she's still Rena Rouge, much to Nino's shock, and adds that she's in hiding, which is why Ladybug didn't want her to tell anyone. Nino asks why she's telling him if she's not supposed to tell anyone - proving my point from a while back that he wouldn't have been upset had she kept it a secret - then asks if Ladybug agreed with it.

I want to give him a pat on the back for considering Ladybug, but he didn't even tell her when he had the chance that Adrien knows his identity now, so I'm just beaten down at this point.

Instead of answering the question directly, Alya says that she can't hide her identity from him because she loves him and they don't have secrets.

You know, like Nino telling Adrien about Rena's identity, or Alya saying specifically that she's a permanent holder, which I'm sure both of them will confess to since they said that they don't have--aaaaand the episode ends on happy triumphant music, okay.

I mean, I guess Alya at least didn't tell him that Marinette was Ladybug, but that is such a low bar and not even remotely worthy of congratulations when Alya told Nino the specific thing that Marinette told Alya not to tell; the thing that they had agreed on.

Nino wasn't upset anymore. He won't be getting akumatized either. Alya endured the supposed hardship of being a permanent fox holder for four episodes before breaking down and telling her boyfriend. Even her excuse doesn't hold any water because, again, they're both still technically keeping a secret, particularly Alya who knows Marinette's identity as Ladybug. The episode also apparently forgets that Alya and Marinette's friendship must not be as strong by her logic of telling Nino specifically everything, as Alya kept Rena Rouge a secret from Marinette for all of Season 3, but tells Nino about continuing to be Rena Rouge in Season 4. Boyfriends before BFFs without explicitly saying it, or to be more specific, whatever screws Marinette over the most, because that's what this comes down to, made worse by "Optigami" where Marinette told Alya that she'd tell her everything and I guess that doesn't go both ways.

"Sentibubbler" had Alya stress that no one would ever know. She promised Marinette and told Marinette to trust her, and the episode spent its entire running time talking her up and assuring Marinette that she was the right choice, even considering Marinette ridiculous for worrying when Alya had done something without Marinette's permission the episode right before it. Then, three episodes after "Sentibubbler," when Marinette is finally comfortable and trusts Alya completely, Alya betrays that trust. Nino betrayed that trust, knowing he wasn't supposed to do so but telling Adrien his and Rena's identity anyway, because he was losing an argument and needed to PROVE something.

Marinette gives them an inch and they take a mile. Marinette bent the rules so that they could continue to have the miraculous they'd started with and they disrespected her because it was hard for like a day.

And if this bites them back, it won't reflect poorly on them, it'll reflect poorly on Marinette.

It's not like Alya just overrode Marinette. She didn't go, "Hey, I'm telling Nino, I'm sorry," or tried her hardest to go back and forth with Marinette until they both agreed. No, she did what she told Marinette she wouldn't do without saying a word to her, because LOVE and SEEEECRETS.

And this only applies to her, of course, because don't think I didn't notice the parallels between this episode and "Truth," because WOW.

Episode begins with Marinette hoping for something and it blows up in her face? A date at the cinema that ends on a sour note? Plot-centric couple trying to get Andre's ice cream and the female with a secret needing to leave in a hurry? Boyfriend character getting akumatized over their girlfriend's secret? Boyfriend assumes/suggests that the girlfriend's secret involves Aaaaaadrien - or his alter-ego in "Rocketear"'s case - and the episode hints as much to him even though he's completely wrong? Akuma's colors are blue and black? THE BRIDGE?

But, ahhh, little difference, here and there, y'know, like how Marinette was forced to break up with her boyfriend while Alya got to keep hers, and Nino got to have long talks with Alya while Luka got little to nothing with Marinette.

Because do note that Alya, while trying to convince Marinette and talk to Nino about not keeping secrets, at no point suggests that Marinette deserves to be happy and deserves to have a boyfriend and that Marinette should be allowed to tell Luka her secret so they can get back together, so you have Alya here selfishly prioritizing her relationship with Nino while making no comment about Marinette's relationship, essentially asking Marinette to allow her what Marinette herself didn't have the luxury of, and Alya knows this because Marinette told her. It is both incredibly insensitive of Alya and incredibly insulting of the show to make so many parallels between this episode and "Truth" just to have everything crash down for Marinette because she's Marinette while everything goes well for Alya and Nino because they're not Marinette.

We've talked before about the formulas that are literally baked into the show, and one of those is how Marinette makes a mistake in every episode and has to learn from it. What that mistake is in this episode, I don't know, but considering that she apologizes for Alya and Nino's problems, I guess the show blames her for what they themselves had taught her.

Point being, there's a clear karma system in place, but it only applies to Marinette, and forcing her to mess up in every episode means that she is literally not allowed to be with Luka because had she been able to clear things up between them, he would've eagerly accepted her and they could've been happy. It'd be too difficult for her to mess up when Luka doesn't put mountains of pressure and expectations on her like everyone else. Factor that in with how she can be herself around him and it leads to situation that are too difficult for her to screw up in because her mistakes - more often than not - center around Adrien or her role as guardian.

And because another rule in the show is to bring up Adrien so they don't "lose him for too long," she can't avoid bringing him up either. If he's not in the plot, he has to be mentioned, leaving Marinette in a lose-lose situation that she'll never be free from.

So, let me just get this straight then:

The guy who spied on his girlfriend instead of talking to her about his assumptions gets to keep his girlfriend, not because he realized it was wrong regardless of whether he was correct or not, but because the situation had been cleared up for him, yet the guy who actively resisted his akumatization, saddened by his girlfriend's secrets but wanting her to share them when she was ready, gets broken up with and tossed to the wayside because he's not a rich blond boy who got a miraculous because he happened to be within the twenty meters of space where Fu was searching for new holders?

Meanwhile, the girlfriend who has gone against the wishes and insistence of her best friend - guardian of the miraculouses, by the way, so she calls the shots, something that Alya herself said in "Optigami" BEFORE GOING ON TO DO HER OWN THING IN THE SAME EPISODE AND BEING REWARDED FOR IT - is allowed to go against the wishes and insistence of her best friend again for the sake of "all love, no secrets" with her boyfriend and so she can have the happy ending she wants, yet the girl who was chosen for a miraculous without her consent, forced to screw up and talk about a random boy who doesn't even go out of his way to spend time with her, treated like absolute trash by writers who find humor in her misery, and is the only one to receive overly harsh and long-lasting consequences for her actions while also covering up and forgiving the actions of others within the episode where they do it...

doesn't get her happy ending, and won't ever get her happy ending. That thing Shadow Moth said about love and secrets not going well together? Yeah, only goes as far as the writers want it to, because both Nino and Alya still have secrets, and some of the ones they did tell each other were forced by someone else and kept until that very moment. This idea that people in love have to tell each other everything and that it makes a relationship stronger makes me immensely uncomfortable, and that lesson is also in "Guiltrip."

People should be allowed their secrets, and obviously there are exceptions for things that are being hidden with malicious intent, but being essentially forced to share everything or risk not having a "full and complete" relationship is stifling and sounds like it'd only cause stress.

This episode sucks. It furthers and confirms everything I've already thought about the show, Nino's screentime continues to be dependent on Adrien, Alya, or both, there are pointless references that completely take me out of the experience, and the utter betrayal from Alya and supposed message of the episode just reminds me that Marinette is inevitably going to be stuck with a guy who didn't even DO anything in this episode and is going to let himself stew instead of asking for any sort of clarifications from someone he apparently trusts so much.

So the takeaway is that Marinette's life is awful, she'll be forced to apologize for rules that she didn't even come up with herself, her best friend will walk all over her for the sake of her relationship with a guy - not even for the sake, really, they were going to be fine, it was more for HER personal comfort if anything - and the guy who actually makes Marinette happy and could've known her identity instead BECAUSE HE AT LEAST DIDN'T HAVE A TRACK RECORD OF SPILLING HER SECRETS gets treated in the exact same way that she does; like nothing, just something to abuse unfairly.

What a waste of an episode.

#MC's Videos #category: episode summaries #category: salt #salt: adrien agreste #salt: chat noir #salt: alya cesaire #salt: nino lahiffe #video: critique #MC's Renders #render: persona #episode: Rocketear #((I would usually apologize for rambling but you guys seem to like it lol.))#((I could still afford to trim down the summary probably and repeat myself/ramble a BIT less but yeah.))#((I'm also feeling a little more comfortable this time around))#((which might come off in my inflections.))

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taestefully-in-luv · 3 years

Text

Always You | JJK (Two)

Summary: you and Jungkook have been best friends since freshmen year of college, there’s a lot of unsaid feelings and tension but neither make a move. what happens when his friend Taehyung (also your crush) needs a fake girlfriend?

Pairing: Jungkook x Female reader, slight Taehyung x Reader

Genre: friends to lovers, idiots to lovers, roommate au, college au, SMUT (starting ch2), fluff, angst (in later chapters) slight crack, lots of drama

Word Count: 9.3k

Warnings: Swearing, alcohol consumption, oc is a bad friend:(, sexual tension (?), body image issues, oc is feeling a lil insecure, mentions of sex, sounds of sex, crying, male masturbation, fantasy includes: spanking and vaginal intercourse.

Notes: thanks for the love for the first part…heres part 2! I hope everyone enjoys:) get ready for drama to come hahaha. If you wanted to be added to the taglist just send me an ask or whatevs, and feel free to send one if you want to discuss the story!

Taglist: @monvieesdaebak @mooniyooni @thisartemisnevermisses @giadalin @kookiebunny097 @cosmosjk @moonchild1 @just-jeon @anpanman-sonyeondan @starlight-night0 @yessii-i

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Gentleman: “A civilized, educated, sensitive, or well-mannered man.” Is how the dictionary defines the word but if you were to look up the term in your own dictionary it would just be a picture of Taehyung’s handsome as hell face.

Opening the car door, pulling your chair out, holding your hand, softly gripping your waist, making you feel like the only one in the room—Taehyung is doing everything right. Your mind should be overwhelmed with the thought of Taehyung. He should be filling your every sense, he should be the only thing you can understand. He should be. But every time his perfect lips land on the skin of your cheek, your mind somehow finds Jungkook. That son of a bitch.

There’s a string of warm lights dangling on the restaurants brick walls, and it’s almost picture perfect but one of the bulbs is out and it’s making the scene less ideal. Your eyes keep going back to the one bulb that refuses to shine. You just want everything to be perfect.

“I know I already told you…” Taehyung is sitting across from you, his gentle smile making your heart flutter, “But you look so pretty tonight.”

You know you should be gazing into his chocolate eyes but you can’t keep your eyes from shifting towards that stupid ass bulb. All the other bulbs are lit up just fucking fine but this bulb wants to be difficult. It just hasto go against everyone else. Your eyes narrow at the string of lights and you scoff. This stupid bulb reminds you of someone.

Taehyung brought you to a decently fancy restaurant, the food is alright but he says the main attraction is the monster baked cookie with ice cream melting over the top. He is excited like a child at the mention of his favorite dessert, you can’t help but smile fondly towards him.

“So…” Taehyung slides the dessert closer to you, “I never asked but how did Jungkook take the whole not really talking in public thing?”

Your eyes shoot up to the stupid bulb and you blink at it a few times. “I…” Your gaze drifts back to him. “I didn’t tell him.”

Taehyung drops his napkin at the news, his eyes slightly widening as he processes your words.

“We just aren’t talking right now.”

You wince as the words leave your mouth, but it’s true. You are a coward who is just ignoring her best friend because you don’t have the balls to face him. You don’t have the balls to forgive him and you definitely don’t have the balls to inform him that he’s out of the picture for a month. Because you don’t have the balls to admit to yourself you chose a boy over your friend. Basically you’re just a bitch with no balls!

“Yeah, he isn’t really talking to me either.” Taehyung chuckles bitterly, “He’s really against this…I mean, I knew he was protective over you but—”

“Protective my ass.” You lean back in your chair, “He’s just being stupid.”

Taehyung looks at you and frowns. It makes you want to kiss his pouting lips.

“But thank you.”

Taehyung’s quizzical expression makes you snort,

“For the compliment. Thank you. You look really handsome as well.” You smile, your hand sliding across the table to hold his. You gently squeeze and pull back, letting go. Taehyung smiles at you but something strange settles in his eyes. He’s struck with an awkward expression as he forces another smile, his lips pulled together tightly.

“Thanks y/n” He opens his mouth then closes then opens, “For doing this. Seriously, thank you.”

“Well, you’re kind of supplying me with free coffee.” You laugh into your hand.

“Regardless,” Taehyung leans back in his chair, “You’re a good friend.”

Right. Friend... But you feel optimistic you will flee this place! The god forsaken friend zone! You smile at Taehyung, grabbing your fork and cutting into the cookie with it. You stare into Taehyung’s dark eyes as you bring the fork to your lips—okay yes, you are most definitely trying to make this sexy—you open your mouth wide and wrap you lips around the piece of cookie, you never break contact with Taehyung. You chew slowly and roll your eyes to the back of your head, like the dramatic ass bitch you are. You open an eye to see his reaction, you see him gulp and a small smile begins forming on his lips.

“mmm” you moan again.

“RIGHT?!”

~~~

“We got some pretty insta worthy photos!” Taehyung chuckles into your hair as he pulls back from the hug. “I would say tonight was a success!”

Right. A success. Because this is all for show. To get this Anna girl off his back. Not because he likes you or anything. You can’t help but feel disappointed in his words.

“That’s good Tae.” Your hands linger on his back, not wanting to let go completely. “I’ll see you tomorrow right?”

“And the next day and the next day,” he teases, “And don’t forget this weekend is the pool party at my friend Jin’s house.” Then Taehyung nibbles on his lips, “Jungkook is going…so you should probably talk to him.”

You probably should of figured Jungkook is going to go…but that doesn’t stop you from feeling shocked. You should tell him he needs to lay low in public for a month but you guys aren’t talking already so do you really have to have that discussion with him?

“We’ll see.”

Taehyung steps forward and grabs your hand, “y/n…I know I said no Jungkook but I really just meant that you two aren’t all over each other in public…you don’t have to ignore him at home too…I’m sure he isn’t feeling great about it. And honestly, it makes me feel guilty too.” He admits softly, his hand feels sweaty in yours.

“He’s an asshole.” You let go of his hand, you feel your chest tighten and you hate yourself.

“Why?”

“It doesn’t matter. I should get inside now.”

“Okay…” Taehyung leans in for another quick hug and places a kiss on your forehead. You wish you could enjoy it but on the other side of this forehead are thoughts of Jungkook. Once again, that son of a bitch.

~~~

The next few days pass quickly, you and Taehyung have gone on two more dates.

The second date felt like a movie—it was classic and dreamy. Taehyung picked you up and drove you over to the next town that was having a carnival. You walked around holding hands, eating cotton candy and laughing at his jokes. The night ended with the ferris wheel, where you two got some insta worthy pictures—one shot including his lips on yours.

It felt so surreal. He posted it on Instagram that night with the caption ‘Her’ with purple hearts and within a couple hours there were at least 50 comments congratulating the two of you.

Third date you two went to a drive in theater. You fed each other popcorn, talked over the radio’s audio and took snaps to prove your date to the world.

This week has been nothing short of amazing. Taehyung is absolutely perfect. You feel like the only girl in the world with him. Like you don’t have to compete with anyone. Unfortunately, the week may have felt amazing on the outside, on the inside it’s been…weird.

The weird part of this week is the lack of Jungkook. Your usual cereal at noon on Tuesdays didn’t happen, your usual weekly episode of My Hero didn’t happen, your usual chit chat and banter didn’t occur. Just silence and awkward passes.

It’s all your doing though…Jungkook has tried. He still sat at the breakfast table munching on Apple Jacks while you passed him by, walking out your front door to meet Taehyung. He saved this week’s episode to your list so you could watch it. He has sent you multiple texts saying he’s sorry and he misses you but you ignored them. You have purposely started putting a distance between the two of you and it makes you uncomfortable.

You remind yourself that, besides doing this because Taehyung requested it, it is also for the best.

~~~

You sit at the edge of your bed staring at the bouquet of flowers Taehyung had sent you this morning. You eye the flowers, taking in their gorgeous appearance. They’re open and full and colorful. But why do you look at them and feel disappointed?

They seem to be begging for water, so you stand to your feet and grab the bouquet. You head for the kitchen to find your mothers crystal vase so you can place the beautiful flowers in it.

Jungkook is sitting at the breakfast table, slurping on some noodles and playing on his phone. You completely ignore him as you walk into the kitchen.

You stand on your tip toes to try to reach the vase in the cupboard but it’s too high for you. God damn it, you think. There’s no way in hell you’re asking Jungkook for help, no way in hell!

*about 10 pathetic seconds later*

“Jungkook, will you help me?”

You don’t even turn around to face him, you just raise your voice so hears you. Yeah, you’re a coward. You hear the screech of the chair against the tiled floor and you shiver. Jungkook doesn’t say anything as he walks up behind you, his chest coming flush against your back and you swear if he tried to pay attention he could probably feel your heartbeat through the contact. You stay frozen as he reaches his arms above you and grabs the vase. He must of just done laundry because his detergent fills your nostrils, its clean and refreshing. He sets the vase down on the counter and he continues to stand closely behind you, his scent now overwhelming your senses.

“These flowers are pretty.” He leans down to say in your ear. His hand coming down to hold on to your waist. “But you only like tulips.”

You can’t help but roll your eyes, “These are fine too.”

“Yeah, they are.” He admits. “But they’re not what you want.” He squeezes your waist, then he’s backing away from your body and a chill is left behind as he gets further away. It’s like the further he walks away from you the colder you become. As if Jungkook is the source of your warmth.

~~~

It’s Saturday afternoon and you are finally done getting ready. Taehyung is taking you out to a pool party today, hosted by one of his close friends—Jim? No, Jin. You know you’ve heard Jungkook talk about him before but haven’t gotten the chance to meet him since he’s a bit older and already graduated.

You look in the mirror as you tug your oversized shirt over your shorts. Underneath is a plain black bikini but unfortunately today is not a good day—you’re bloated as hell and it shows. At least you think it does. You continue to rate yourself in the mirror when Jungkook walks past your room.

“Didn’t know you were so self obsessed.” He pops in to say.

You turn to face him and as soon as he sees your frustrated expression he knows you’re on the verge of waterworks.

“Woah woah, whats wrong?” Jungkook is quick to rush to your side. You’ve been ignoring him for a week yet he still rushes to you when you need him. You’re a god damn bitch.

“I feel fat but I have a pool party to attend to and—”

“You’re going to that too…?” Jungkook eyes the ground under his feet. He sounds disappointed.

You try to steady your breathing but you feel a breakdown coming and Jungkook can sense it too.

“You’re not fat.” He states plainly.

“You wouldn’t know with these clothes I’m wearing.” You try to reason.

“Then take them off and show me.” He’s obviously aware of the bathing suit underneath but still, his words do something strange to you.

“No, I’m ugly.” Is all you respond with.

“y/n I don’t have time for this, either show me or like, don’t go.”

“Fine!”

You begin unbuttoning your shorts, painfully slow. He watches as you fumble with the zipper as you slide it down. You drag the shorts down your legs one by one and then you reach for the hem of your shirt pulling it over your head. This leaves you half naked and feeling incredibly vulnerable.

Jungkook eyes you up and down quite shamelessly. His tongue darts out to lick his lip and he muffles a groan,

“You look fine.” He says so nonchalantly it makes you want to pull his hair out.

“Just fine?”

“You look good y/n” he says, his eyes sliding to the left. You don’t feel quite satisfied with his answer so you step towards him, getting so close he is forced to step back until his back is against the wall.

“How good?” you say, your voice dipping lower than usual, “So good you would—"

Bbbrrrr bbbrrrr bbrrrrr bbrrrr

Your phone.

“Hello? ….Hey Tae. No need, I’ll just meet you at your car. Okay, bye.” You click the phone off and throw it on your bed. You gather your clothes and put them back on as Jungkook stands there awkwardly. Once you have your things you turn to face Jungkook.

“Well Tae is here…” you motion towards the door. “Look, if you’re going to be at the party can you try to…respect my fake relationship? We wanna make it as real as poss—”

“I get it.” Jungkook snaps before walking out your bedroom. Fantastic.

~~~

“And this is y/n.” Taehyung pushes you forward by the shoulders as you stumble in front of all these new faces.

“Hi everyone.” You squeak out.

Everyone gives you a warm welcome, many handshakes and hugs later you feel well acquainted. You notice a familiar face. He’s laughing with Jin over some beers and you smile in their direction. Namjoon, a friend you met freshmen year. He notices you look in his direction and he waves you over. So you walk towards him and Jin, Namjoon handing you a drink as you get closer.

“Long time no see y/n!” his dimples light up the entire backyard. He glances between you and Taehyung, who is chatting with some others.

“You and our Taehyungie, huh?” He grins at you, “honestly, I thought you would end up with Jungkook.” You can’t help but blush at that. A real deep blush. Namjoon chuckles but his eyes hold pity.

“no no not Jungkook.” You laugh awkwardly.

“Well, Jungkook has always spoken really highly of you so I am sure Taehyung is a lucky guy.” Jin chimes in.

For some reason you feel sick at that. Jungkook speaks highly of you? Yet here you are ignoring him for another guy. You are avoiding your own best friend because of a boy. Fuck, you are the worst.

“thanks guys…well, I’m gonna go see Tae.”

You walk over to Taehyung, and when he spots you he absolutely lights up. His boxy grin taking over his entire face.

“There’s my girl,” he pulls you in for a hug and places a kiss to your head. You want to melt, you want to feel the lava of love drown you but instead you feel anxious as you notice Jungkook from across the yard. He’s got a beer to his lips and his eyes on you.

“Thanks for doing this y/n.” Taehyung also catches the pair of eyes watching the two of you. He meets Jungkook’s hard gaze and automatically Taehyung is filled with anxiety as well. Jungkook just shakes his head towards his friend and takes a generous sip of his drink.

“Everything okay?” you ask, squeezing his hand in yours.

“Everything is fine.” He says with a tight lip smile. “Just glad you’re here.” He says honestly.

A few hours pass, and the whole gang is crowded in the pool. Mostly everyone is drunk, but you are pretty sober. Not wanting a repeat of last weekend. Yikes, amirite ladies? Taehyung has his hands all over you, which you don’t really mind. The thought of him touching you was once something that might make you faint but you’ve grown comfortable. Your eyes scan the pool when you notice Jungkook is nowhere to be found. Did he go home already? Maybe he was feeling so down because you’ve been ignoring him…god, you hate yourself. You just need to talk to him. You’re a shitty friend, for sure.

“I’m gonna be right back,” you whisper to Taehyung. He only nods his head and continues chatting with his friends.

Jin’s house is beyond nice, and also huge. You are trying to find the bathroom but feel like you are opening every door but the one you’re looking for. There’s only one door left at the end of the main hall and you bet your entire ass it’s the bathroom. You reach for the door knob when you hear something muffled on the other side. Oh, it’s taken.

“Thanks for this.” It’s a woman’s voice.

“No problem.” Its Jungkook. You feel your stomach drop. What makes you feel worse is how detached Jungkook sounds. He sounds far away and broken. The doorknob begins to rattle and you try to make a run for it in time but are too late. The door is swinging open and one of Jin’s friends is walking out and in the background you see Jungkook zipping up his pants. His eyes meet yours and you want to run the fuck away.

“y/n?” Jungkook’s eyes expand twice their size as he spots you.

“I was…I was just looking for the bathroom.”

Jungkook’s face hardens, “Well, you found it.” He makes his way to pass you but you grab on to his arm to stop him.

“Wait,” you breathe in and out, trying to give yourself time to think of what you want to say.

“What is it?” his voice is somehow softer than he probably intended.

“I want to talk to you…explain to you why I’ve been ignoring you.”

“Yeah, you’re still pissed at me, I fucking get it.” He spits out bitterly.

“It’s…it’s more than that.”

“More than that? Did I do something more? What did I do? y/n just tell me…” He rocks back and forth on his heels, his eyes glued to the ground.

“You’re going to be so mad at me, maybe even hate me—”

“You know I could never hate you.” He whispers, sounding so sincere it crushes you.

You glance around your surroundings, making sure no one is around and drag him back into the bathroom for some privacy. You shut the door behind you, trying so hard to ignore the smell of sex.

“Tae thought—” you begin but Jungkook is already rolling his eyes to the back of his head.

“Of course Tae thought.” His tone almost scares you. “Let me guess? Taehyung doesn’t want me around while you guys are fake dating. That’s not fucking weird to you?” He grits between his teeth. He balls up his fists at his side, you see his knuckles turn white and it makes you feel uneasy.

“He made some good points…”

“Oh really?” Jungkook laughs bitterly, “Like what?”

You looked into Jungkook’s doe eyes and feel a sense of guilt, like you somehow made the wrong choice.

“He thinks we’re too close. And he’s right. It would be weird if I’m super closer to another guy while dating him.” you reason, but your face falls when you see Jungkook’s scrunched up expression.

“You think we’re too close?” he whispers.

Well, yes. But also, no. Of course not, but also yes. How do you tell Jungkook all of that?

“People always think we’re dating or fucking or—”

“Oh? And all the sudden we care what people think?” his voice wavers from the rollercoaster of emotions he is feeling.

“Jungkook wait, I’m wording this all wrong. It’s just for a month okay?”

“You wanna date him that badly? That you would throw me away?” he grits out.

“Hey! That’s not fucking fair.”

“So what? Say your little fantasy comes true and he decides he wants to date you for real? Am I still out of the picture?”

“No no, of course not…” you shake your head and reach for his hands but he pulls away.

“So then what’s the difference now?”

Jungkook has a good point but you’re at a loss for words. Too choked up to speak.

“And you know what y/n? Fuck you for choosing him over me in the first place.” And with that Jungkook breezes past you, swings open the bathroom door and is out of your view.

Jungkook has never spoken to you like that before, you stand there with your mouth hung open and tears forming in your eyes.

He’s right. You fucked up. You did a fucked up thing. You chose a boy who may not even actually like you over the one guy who has always had your back.

“y/n?” you snap your head in the direction of the door to see Taehyung standing there. A look of disappointment decorating his face.

“I was told you and Jungkook were in the bathroom…” he spits out.

“I had to talk to him, that’s all.”

“Yeah, but how does this look for me?” Taehyung speaks sternly. You did NOT need this right now.

“Tae—”

“You couldn’t even last more than a week y/n.” he scoffs.

“Listen could we just talk about this later?” you ask with pleading eyes.

“I’ll call an uber.” He motions towards the hallway, “we can talk tomorrow.”

You slump your shoulders and nod your head, tomorrow sounds like it’s for the best.

3 days have passed and neither Jungkook nor Taehyung have talked to you.

You hear Jungkook come in and out of the apartment but you’re too shy to make a move outside of your bedroom. He’s either coming from classes, the gym, Jimins, or some girls house and you’re dying to know which.

You have been hibernating in your room, taking comfort in your bed when you get a notification from Instagram.

@V tagged you in a post.

You scramble to unlock your phone so you can view the post. Once you are on the app you click on you notifs and click on the post.

It’s a picture of you eating cotton candy from when he took you to the fair on your date. With the caption:

“Missing my girl tonight”

And a bunch of heart emojis. Your own heart sinks. He misses you? You close the app and instead open your messages.

y/n 9:08pm

You miss me for the show or is there some truth behind that?

Taehyung 9:20pm

Maybe it’s both?

Taehyung 9:22pm

I am sorry for how I left things…I was just kinda embarrassed that my supposed girl was with another guy,,,in a bathroom.

y/n 9:24pm

trust me I know how it looks and im sorry…

y/n 9:26pm

If it makes you feel any better Jungkook isn’t talking to me either.

Taehyung 9:26pm

Of course that doesn’t make me feel better, he is your best friend…

y/n 9:28pm

tae, I hope we can continue this…I still want to help you…

Taehyung 9:34pm

Ill pick you up at 6 for a date tmrw: )

y/n 9:34pm

I cant wait: ) : )

You click your phone off and toss it on the other side of the bed, you squeal in excitement as the realization hits that Taehyung still wants to do this with you.

You hear Jungkook on the other side of the wall, yelling into what you assume is his headset. He’s gaming. You miss him so god damn much. He has no idea what his silence is doing to you. You try to focus your attention on tomorrows date with Taehyung but you can’t help the feeling in the pit of your stomach. Guilt. You were an awful friend and now thinking about it you are continuing to be an awful friend. If he even counts you as friends anymore.

“fuck you”

Those words ring loud and clear in your ears. You didn’t even know Jungkook was capable of speaking to you like that. It fucking hurts.

Jungkook is in his room pacing back and forth. He saw it. The insta post. And he feels like he’s losing you. Neither of you have made a move to speak to the other. He’s just too hurt and you continue to see Taehyung? You obviously don’t feel too bad about the whole ordeal. And 3 days is just too long. A week was too long, but somehow these 3 days are worse.

Jungkook grabs his phone and opens up tinder. He messages one of the girls that’s been teasing him lately. He figures now is the time to make more of a move.

Jungkook 10:00pm

Hey ;) what are you doing tonight?

Leslie 10:10pm

Gonna be thinking about you probably;)

Jungkook 10:12pm

Instead of thinking about me, come see me.

And that was it, that’s all it took. She was quick to agree and he is already sending her the address.

It’s after 11pm when you hear the front door open, you quietly get out of bed, curiosity getting the best of you. Was Jungkook leaving? But then you hear a girls voice and you immediately frown. Oh. She sounds pretty. Is that even a thing? Well, she does. And it has you feeling weird. You thought you were over this.

You hear the patter of their footsteps walking towards Jungkook’s room, the sound of his door opening and closing just like that.

You walk back to your bed feeling ashamed for spying, but now you know you won’t be getting any sleep tonight. Fanfuckingtastic.

“aaahhh…” the random girl whines out causing you to shift uncomfortably in your bed.

“More?” you can hear Jungkook’s muffled voice, he sounds strained. Probably because he’s fucking some girl a few feet away from you.

You reach over to your nightstand for your headphones when you hear Jungkook grunting as the beds headboard bangs against your wall, he groans and moans and you feel yourself getting hotter.

You try not to imagine Jungkook in these scenarios but he sounds…no, you won’t have those thoughts…you don’t want to remember. Your hand is still midair when you retreat it back to your bed.

“Fuck yeah baby.” You hear him gripe. And you squeeze your thighs together. No, this cannot be happening.

“Jungkook! Jungkook!” Fuck, she sounds so fucked out.

“Feels so good, feels so good” he pants over and over and you feel the back of your eyes burn.

“gonna come” he groans out and your chest is heaving now, your breathing becoming a chore. You can’t cry, not over this. He hates you and he’s buried in some other girl. And you want to fucking crying about it. You hear him moaning on the other side of the wall and then—

“Fuuuuuuccckk” his orgasm is fucking apparent. He’s obviously coming and you’re lying in your bed all fucking pathetic with tears staining your cheeks.

Jungkook lays in bed totally fucked out of his mind. This girl is sleeping next to him, trying to her best to cuddle but he resists. He wishes he had time to himself to think properly. He just fucked another girl and thought of you the entire time. He is 100% fucked up. Wait, wait. He needs to explain himself…it’s not like he thought of you like, sexually. It’s just you’re all that’s on his mind. Even during fucking sex. And he hates himself for it.

He decides to sneak out of bed to have a shower. He creaks open his door for any sign of life and when there is none he tip toes to the bathroom. Jungkook stands in the shower letting the warm water cascade over his skin, he just stands there lifeless.

Images of you cross his mind and he sinks to his knees, pulling them into his chest and he quietly curses under his breath. He misses you so much and things have gotten so messed up he just doesn’t even know how to fix it.

He scrubs himself clean, ridding the scent of the random girl he brought over. He sniffles under the raining water hating himself.

Jungkook dries himself off with your towel, and puts on his shorts. His chest left bare.

He exits the bathroom when he notices a light coming from the kitchen and sees you sitting at the table with a glass of water.

“oh.” Jungkook slips up.

“oh?” you wonder.

“I thought you were fast asleep.” He says, rubbing the back of his neck with a sheepish grin.

“Just woke up.” You lie through your teeth with a strained smile. “Couldn’t sleep…”

“I know the feeling…” he admits, walking closer to you.

Jungkook makes his way to the table before pulling out a chair and sitting down next to you.

“Listen—”

“Jungkook—”

You both begin talking at the same time. Jungkook ushers you to go first.

“I…I’m still fake dating Tae.”

“I know.”

“But…” your eyes gloss over, getting choked up trying to continue. “But I am so sorry.” A few tears spill from your eyes.

“I know y/n.” he reaches his hand to squeeze your knee. You feel so much better with him touching you. “I’m sorry too…I was really harsh. And it pains me every day that I haven’t talked to you.”

“Trust me, I get it. I wanted to like, kill myself not talking to you.” Your eyes slam shut as more tears threaten to fall.

Jungkook’s face morphs into a deep frown, “You know I don’t like when you say that…”

“Right…sorry.”

“Honestly y/n…I don’t know when I will be okay with this, but I’ll respect your wishes for the month.”

“Jungkook…” Your hand flies down to his and you squeeze it but he’s quick to let it go.

“I’m mad at you right now.” He admits softly, his breathing is slow and steady. “So just give me some space.”

~~~

Like magical clockwork you hear light knocking on your front door. You scramble to find your phone and your purse to make it to the door in good time but you hear it being creaked open and the voices of two men. Shit, Jungkook got to the door first.

Ever since you started fake dating Taehyung it seems Jungkook has been keeping a distance from him. You aren’t sure why but they’ve been weird. So you want to avoid as much awkwardness as possible. You grab all your belongings and rush to the living room and find the two men sitting on the sofa quietly chatting.

“Can you keep your voice down dude?” Taehyung peers over his shoulder, looking in the direction of your room. “Would if she hears?”

“I wish she would fucking hear,” Jungkook grits through his teeth, his eyes rolling to the back of his head, “Why don’t you just tell her?” he leans back on the back of the sofa, “She might be understanding, hm? Do it before it’s too late or I swear to god Taehyung I will tell her myself.”

“You swore you wouldn’t say shit. Just like how I swore not to say any—”

“Okay.”

“I’ll tell her dude. Just give me some time to—"

Jungkook’s eyes shoot up when he hears the light creak of your bedroom door open, he waits expectantly for you to walk through.

“Hey guys,” you announce your presence and both boys look up at you and smile. Taehyung with his boxy grin and Jungkook with a tightlipped smile.

“Hey y/n, you look nice,” Taehyung stands to his feet and walks towards you, “I mean, you always do.” He stops just in front of you and hands you a bag.

“What’s this?” you take the bag and jingle it around a bit.

“just something for our date.” He grins. “You can open it later.” Taehyung glances over at Jungkook, “Anyway, let’s get going. See you later man.” He nods toward the boy and faces you again. “shall we?”

You smile up at Taehyung and take his hand in your yours and lead him towards the front door but before you leave you and Jungkook make eye contact and he frowns.

Taehyung being the gentlemen he is runs to the car before you and opens your car door.

“Feet inside?” he asks and you’re nodding yes when he shuts the door for you. He runs around the other side and enters the car himself. Taehyung settles on an old 50’s station with the volume just right. He’s humming along with a dopey grin on his face, feeling satisfied with his choice.

“Where are we going?” you ask.

“Let’s get some dinner first then we can do our date activity I have planned” he chuckles to himself, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel.

You drive around in comfortable silence when you decide to take your phone out and shoot Jungkook a text.

y/n 6:14pm

You okay?

Jungkook 6:16pm

Don’t worry about me while you’re out with another guy

“Everything okay?” Taehyung asks, pulling you out of your thoughts.

“hm? Oh, yeah. Just thinking.” You reply quite honestly.

“About Jungkook?”

“What?? Why would you assume that?” your voice rises in panic.

“Well, we were all just together and I know you and him are fighting…I thought it was a safe assumption.” He laughs awkwardly.

“Oh…right. Actually, me and Jungkook sorted things out kind of but we’re still barely talking.”

“oh? Really?” Taehyungs grip on the steering wheel tightens.

“He said he will steer clear for the month, ya know, in public.”

“He—he agreed?” Taehyung coughs a few times, his head pushed back in disbelief.

“Something like that.” You don’t really know what to say, this is an awkward thing to be talking about and you wish the subject would change.

“Anyway,” you begin, “How did things with Anna escalate?”

Taehyung freezes. The color draining from his face as his knuckles turn white from gripping the steering wheel so hard.

“Um.” Taehyung feels sweat beading on his forehead as he tries to come up with an answer.

“You know how it is,” his mouth feels dry as he tries to speak, “She just won’t leave me alone and I want to show her that I am taken so she will get the hint.” Then a sly smile spreads across his face “and I think it’s working.”

“You think so?” you raise a brow in question.

“Well, you are such a convincing girlfriend after all.” His right arm extends towards your knee and he squeezes it. “Thanks again y/n…” he almost sounds…guilty. But you push that thought away and smile at him. Your sweet smile making him feel even guiltier.

~~~

“Dinner was sooo good.” You raise your arms above your head, stretching your body, a satisfied moan leaving you as you lower your arms again.

“I knew you’d like it! Best pizza in town!” Taehyung sets his credit card in the bill holder on the table. “Ready for what I have planned next?”

“hmmm, yes.”

The two of you wait for the server to return so you can finish paying so you can leave. Once all finished up at the restaurant the two of you head back to the parking lot and get inside his car to go to your next destination.

“Your apartment?” you ask as you notice his building coming into view.

“Yes. But you’ll see.” He turns his head quickly to flash you his pearly whites.

The two of you walk to his front door as he unlocks the door. Taehyung has a two bedroom apartment but lives alone. You’ve only ever seen his kitchen and living room and you’re wondering if you’re lucky enough you’ll see his bedroom. Hehe but that’s wishful thinking.

“You have that bag?” Taehyung asks,

“yup,” you say lifting it up and showing him the precious goods.

“Great go put it on!”

You tilt your head in confusion but you see how excited he is so you walk to his bathroom and shut the door behind you. Would if it was lingerie? You giggle to yourself at the ridiculous idea.

You open the bag to find some type of clothing. First, you pull out a large white t shirt and next was an…apron? The apron was a light pink color with a pocket in the front with your initials embroidered on it. You gasp once you realize it, your heart beating out of your chest as you melt into a puddle on the floor. He got your initials on an apron? You hurry to change into the white t shirt and put the apron on.

“Cute.” You murmur to yourself in the mirror before you’re out the door and back into the living room.

“How do you like it?” Taehyung asks from behind you, surprising you with a glass of water. You take the water gratefully and gulp down a few sips before answering.

“love it, but what’s it for?”

Taehyung beams, grabbing your arm and leading you into one of the bedrooms. He stands in front of the door and bounces on his heels.

“Ready?”

“Yes?”

“Never showed anyone this room but I feel like you’re special” Taehyung giggles, “Plus I thought it was a cute date idea.”

“hmm, okay. I’m ready.” You are such a fool for this boy, his cuteness doing a million things to you.

Taehyung begins to slowly open the door revealing a room with tarp covering the ground and easels taking up space. There are buckets of paint, a variety of colors spread all across. And many, many art pieces.

“You…” you begin to say in awe, “You’re an artist, Tae?”

“Aspiring.” He chuckles a bit bitterly. “How would you like to paint together?”

“You feel comfortable enough with me?” you ask, surprised.

“Something about you….” He starts but leaves it hanging. “Let’s paint!”

You dip your paint brush in purple paint and stroke it across the canvas, the color joining a mess of other colors. That’s art, right? Fuck, you are not good at this. You sneak a glance over at Taehyung to see him painting a scenic art piece. There’s mountains and flowers but somehow in an abstract kind of way, you tilt your head to the side trying to eye it more carefully.

“Hey, no peeking!” his bottom lip jutting out in the cutest way. You just want to kiss it.

You stand from your stool and walk over to his, your eyes never leaving his art work.

“I’m trying to figure out what I am looking at. Don’t get me wrong, its super cool. But like there’s this beautiful tree with flowers but also shapes??”

“Its abstract, y/n.” his tone is light and makes you flutter. “I like it this way.” He says softly.

“me too.” You look at him, his eyes meeting yours. His gaze shifts to your lips.

“heh really?” Taehyung’s cheeks turn a wonderful shade of pink, like the flowers on his canvas.

“You really are amazing, aren’t you?”

“Me? Let’s see what you got!” He stands from his stool and begins walking over to your art work.

“No!” you stand in his way, your arms flailing above your head. “It’s not good!” You laugh and push his chest back with your hands, Taehyung wobbles in place as he laughs at your dramatics.

“It can’t be that bad.”

You finally let him walk past you, he stands in front of your canvas with his finger on his chin,

“Okay, it can be that bad.”

Taehyung bubbles with laughter and you hit his shoulder but end up laughing with him.

“I told you.” You pout. Taehyung stares at you, his eyes once again shifting towards your lips and you aren’t going to play dumb, of course you’ve noticed.

“What?” you jut your lip out even more, walking just a bit closer to him.

“Nothing, you’re just cute.” Taehyung admits. His long fingers brush against your cheek as he pushes a piece of hair behind your ear.

“Like, really cute.”

Well, holy shit. Your heart and also your vagina cannot take this.

“How cute?” you breathe out.

“So cute I could kiss you.” Taehyung walks closer, his foot bumping into yours. “But…” He looks down at the ground, guilt beginning to surface, “y/n I have to tell—”

You tilt your head up and meet his lips for a peck on the lips taking him by surprise. Taehyung knits his brows together and is about to say something when he sighs out instead. One of his hands travel to cup the back of your head to bring you closer to him and he kisses you again. He deepens the kiss. Its slow and there’s no tongue, just lips moving tenderly against one another. You feel so light and airy like you could just float away until he abruptly pulls back.

“What’s wrong?” you panic, worry filling your eyes.

“We—we shouldn’t do that.” He finally says after a moment. Why? It was just some kissing between two people who possibly like each other? It’s not like you were delusional right? It’s not like you were making this up in your head. The flowers, the apron, the dinners, the car door, the ‘missing my girl’, the way he treats you can’t just be because of some fake dating bullshit. You know he is known for his kindness but to this extent?

“Why?” you finally say.

“Because,” Taehyung drags a hand across his face, “No one’s around. Let’s just take our pictures—”

BBrrrrrr bbbrrrr brrrrrr bbbrrrr

Taehyung’s phone is sitting on the table next to where the two of you are, it’s going off and you naturally glance over.

Incoming call: Anna

Taehyung races to turn it off, his face flushing and his hands have become sweaty.

“She…she just doesn’t give up.” He chuckles awkwardly, his phone in his grasp as you hear the buzzing of incoming messages.

“Is that her too?” you ask, feeling sorry for him.

“Uh, yeah…probably.” He says, his eyes looking all over the room but never on you.

“Well, let’s see what she’s saying.” You say nonchalantly, reaching for his phone but he yanks his hand back and barks a loud ‘No’. Startled, you step away from him.

“Sorry, I just…” he rubs his neck.

“No no, it’s okay, I shouldn’t have reached for your phone like that…” Something is off, You can feel it. But you want to push that feeling away.

“Let’s just take the pictures, I need to get home soon.”

“Yeah, okay.” Taehyung forces a smile.

~~~

Something is off with Taehyung. The way he wanted to kiss you but then pulled back. The way he got super weird after Anna called. Has she traumatized him that much? Is she like a real, legit stalker who is totally and completely obsessed with him? You feel bad for the guy, he seems like he probably has trust issues or something. Maybe he thinks you might turn out to be like her and he’s scared of that so that’s why he is pushing you away.

That’s gotta be it. You roll around in your bed about to finally get some sleep when you hear music blaring through the wall. Jungkook. You roll your eyes at his choice of timing. The clock reads after midnight, why the hell is he blasting music at this time?

You rise from your bed and storm into his room. Jungkook looks surprised to see you as he is in the middle of doing pushups—shirtless.

His muscles ripple with every movement and it has you practically drooling.

“Uh, can I help you?” Jungkook doesn’t look very annoyed, mostly amused.

“It’s late, Jungkook. Can you turn this shit down?”

“Can’t. Didn’t get a work out in today…so here I am.” He rises to his feet, shrugging.

The music is some horrible rock back that you can’t stand and Jungkook knows this. He fucking knows this. Wow, he really is mad at you still.

“Listen dude,” you put your hands on your hips, “I’ve had a weird day and I just want to relax.”

“Oh baby, I can think of a way for you to relax.” He winks. You want to puke, why is Jungkook so gross.

“Ew.”

“So…how was it?” Jungkook’s eyes fall to the ground.

“What?”

“How—how was your date with Taehyung?” he doesn’t raise his eyes, they stay glued to the floor.

“It was…” you get flashbacks to the awkward date, “fine.” You finish, not wanting to give Jungkook any more reason to dislike you and Taehyung together. “Yeah, it was fine” you force a smile.

“You know I know better than anyone when you’re lying.” He says, finally looking at you again.

Fuck. He’s right, if anyone knows you and your lying habits its Jungkook. He can read you like his favorite book. And it’s like, a picture book. Super fucking easy.

“It was fine Jungkook.” You lie again.

“What happened?” his tone eases into something softer, something more comforting and it almost makes you break and tell him the truth. Almost. But not quite.

“Nothing happened. Keep the music down, I’m going to bed.”

Jungkook watches as you spin on your heels to exit his bedroom, his eyes caving and watching your ass the entire time. He has a love-hate relationship with your house shorts, they’re sexy as hell and that’s the problem.

Jungkook turns the volume down on his speakers and sits on the edge of his bed. His head falls into his hands as he thinks about your date with Taehyung. Something must have happened. He knows it. He feels it. But he can’t force you to tell him.

He lays back on his bed and his face hardens as he thinks more about your fake relationship. He wants to beat Taehyungs ass. He wish he could tell you but it’s not his place and he just wishes Taehyung will do the right thing.

While staying loyal to Taehyung is he betraying you?

~~~~

Best friend: “A person you value over other friends in your life, someone you have fun with, someone you trust and someone in whom you confide.” That’s how the dictionary would describe the word but in Jungkook’s dictionary it would just be your cute face. Everything about you is cute to him, the way you walk, talk, dress, sneeze, just everything.

Even when you look gross as hell in the mornings dealing with a nasty hangover he still viewed you as…cute.

When Jungkook first noticed you was in his Literature class that took place on Tuesdays and Thursdays. He knew you always sat in the back and took your notes without really paying him any attention. And not to sound like a cocky bastard but…why not? He obviously thought you were pretty and there was something about you…

The second time he noticed you was at some frat party where he caught you staring at him and he thought he finally might have a chance at talking to you. Or get in your pants at least. He could one and done this situation and move on with his life but much to his surprise you weren’t interested in getting dicked down by him. No, you were interested in just…hanging out. Which he wasn’t use to. Most girls just wanted to say the got with the Jeon Jungkook and don’t pay him any mind for something serious. Because apparently he isn’t the type of guy you could be “serious” with. It’s not like he doesn’t hear the rumors. He hated this honestly…but he guesses it’s his own fault.

He even playfully offered to take you upstairs that night but you refused him. Much too shy. So he got a better idea: the 24 hour diner down the road.

You ended up talking until 9 am the next morning, laughing and snorting, telling tons of stories that cracked the two of you up. He even shared deeply personal information with you that shocked the both of you. But it just felt right—talking to you. He felt like he could open his heart to you, like he was making a real friend.

Jungkook doesn’t have much of a dating history…he mostly just sleeps around and is okay with that—because he has to be. Like what was said earlier, Jungkook isn’t a guy you get “serious” with and all the girls knew that. It just started with one girl spreading the fact he isn’t the type to ‘do’ relationships. He thought this would cause girls to try harder and try to change him or whatever. But none cared enough. He guesses…he just isn’t worth it. Does Jungkook yearn for something more? You wouldn’t know because he has never voiced it. Even though he isn’t lucky in love, he did get super lucky in a friend. That’s you. He cherishes your friendship more than anything in the world and wouldn’t do anything to risk ruining it.

3 years ago

“What about you?” you smile at him with all your teeth, “What are your parents like?”

You didn’t know at the time but this question made Jungkook feel the very dread he avoids feeling.

He looked into your wide eyes and couldn’t help the sigh that escapes his lips.

“Dad cheated the whole time and moms not around anymore.” Jungkook picks at his cuticles.

You felt a pang of guilt for bringing it up…but you were too curious to stop.

“Where did she go?” you can’t seem to stop yourself from asking.

Jungkook pauses his bad habit, his fingers coming to a halt.

“Can we change the subject?” he finally says, a small smile spreading across his lips, “It’s like, uh…a touchy subject. Ya know?” he almost looks as if he feels bad that he can’t confide in you.

“I promise I will tell you about it someday.” He swears with his pinky joining your pinky. You felt content with his answer but somehow you knew he probably never would.

Jungkook lays in his bed with his head dangling off the edge. Its 10 at night and you’re still not back. You had another date with Taehyung today—he knows because he follows the both of you on Instagram and you posted a photo of Taehyung in front of a mural that’s located just downtown. He grabs his phone to check your location and unfortunately you are still in the same spot—Taehyungs apartment. He hates this. Why does he hate this? Because Taehyung doesn’t deserve you and what he’s doing is not right. But he can’t tell you that because none of this is his business. Instead all he does is piss you off and he hates himself for it.

He truly thinks the world of you, he truly wants nothing but the best for you and he truly loves you. You’re his best friend.

Jungkook starts to doze off when he hears the front door being unlocked. It’s you.

Quickly, Jungkook jumps to his feet and scurries to his bedroom door and places his ear over the wood. He hears you talking…then another voice. You’re not alone. Its muffled but he makes out what you’re saying.

“It was amazing T,” oh, you’re with Trina. “He got me flowers, took pictures of me and got all my best angles.” He hears you giggling then another voice joins you in your laughter.

“I told you! This was a great idea!” Trina says, Jungkook rolls his eyes.

“He was such a gentlemen the whole time and it…I know it’s not real but I don’t know man…it feels real sometimes.”

“Girl, he would be stupid not to have a thing for you.” For once, Trina and Jungkook agree on something.

“I would actually kill myself if he did!” you giggle.

Jungkook goes rigid at your words, his jaw clenching so hard it ticks. He hates when you say shit like that, it creates a suffocating bubble around him that’s too hard to pop.

Jungkook decides he’s eavesdropped enough and settles back on his bed. He lays back, his arms folded behind him. He feels beyond frustrated and doesn’t know what could cure this. Well, maybe sex? Maybe he should call up some girl…maybe that could make him feel better. But somehow that didn’t appeal to him so much in this moment when his brain is occupied of you. So he settles for himself. It’s been a while since Jungkook gave himself a handy but he’s not opposed of going for it.

The lights are off and Jungkook is deciding if he wants to watch porn or settle for his imagination. A girl he use to hook up with enters his mind and he decides to roll with it, he dips his hands underneath his boxers to feel up his hardening length. He reaches for his nightstand to squirt some lube in his hand, his cock is only half hard by the time he’s gently stroking himself. The skin on his cock is smooth with few veins decorating the length, he’s already leaking precum while his imagination starts up.

He thinks of this girl and her lips, how she looks with them wrapped around his greedy cock and he becomes even harder. Fuck, he can’t remember her name—a piece of shit move but he doesn’t care at this point. He’s stroking himself faster, gathering the precum at his tip and smearing it around. A light moan escapes his lips as he tugs on the head of his cock harder. His other hand drags his boxers down his legs as his continues to stroke himself and then reaches to fondle his balls. He groans at the sensation.

He then thinks of the girls ass in the air, her wiggling it around and begging him to fuck her. Her ass is round and plump, it jiggles slightly as she squirms below him. His hand moves quickly as his thoughts get dirtier. He doesn’t see her face just her ass and her voice sounds a lot like…yours. Fuck, he can’t be thinking of you right now. He’s pissed at you, his thoughts growing angry yet somehow his hand doesn’t stop. He’s so close it fucking hurts.

“Fuck…y/n..” he whimpers into his shoulder. He now sees your face, underneath him, your hair all splayed out. Your lips are swollen and you whine for him, begging for him to fuck into you faster. Jungkook squeezes his eyes shut at that image, his hand stroking him impossibly fast as he is beginning to lose all composure. He shouldn’t be thinking of you right now, or ever—not like this. But he hears you beg for him, he imagines flipping you over, demanding you to raise your ass in the air. You beg to be punished, you beg for him to spank you, and he does. He pulls his hand back and slaps your needy ass and you whimper. He does it again and again.

He sees himself insert his cock into your pussy and he’s thrusting in and out like his life depends on it. Jungkook’s hand squeezes desperately around his throbbing member, he cries out quietly as he fucks you in his mind.

He imagines you reaching your own high, your moans and screams ringing in his ears and that’s what sets him over the edge. His cum spurts out of his swollen cock, spraying all over his hand as he begins to come to a stop on himself.

“fuck fuck fuck fuck” Jungkook is out of breath, his fantasy too much for him to handle. “What the fuck did I just….”

He sits in complete silence as his breathing comes down. Did he just? He is not supposed to do that.

#bts #bts smut #bts fluff #bts angst #jeon Jungkook #Jungkook x reader #jungkook smut #jungkook angst #jungkook fluff #kim taehyung #taehyung smut #taehyung fluff #taehyung angst

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chainofclovers · 3 years

Text

Ted Lasso 2x10 thoughts

GOOD GOD.

“No Weddings and a Funeral” is like being hungover but also coming out of a hangover. Having a terrible cold but also feeling better and appreciating every breath that comes through your nose. Embarking on an organizational project and accidentally falling into a photo album and crying about the pictures and organizing almost nothing tangible but making a few things more clear in your brain.

So much of this episode is about the AWFUL POINTLESSNESS OF DECORUM. How loud is too loud when you’re drinking stolen wine and shrieking about sex in a church right before your father’s funeral? How should you feel--thirty years later, as an accommodating, anger-averse person--about having been too angry to attend the funeral for your father who killed himself? What expression should you make when you show up really late to a different funeral? Why must you wear uncomfortable shoes just because someone died? What happens in your mind between standing up to give a eulogy for a man you’re still angry with and choosing to Rick Roll your mom and everyone else as an act of complicated love, humiliatingly incomplete until someone else starts to sing? Should you worry about your therapist seeing your normally tidy flat in a full-on state of depression mess? Is it okay to be offended that your boyfriend is so uncomfortable about death that he can’t stop making morbid jokes? Should you care about other people caring that you’re crunching an apple in church or squealing with joy to be reunited with a friend you’ve not seen in awhile? Are you obligated to explain your behavior if your kid doesn’t understand how you could stay with someone unfaithful? How far behind the counter should you sink when your [undefined relationship person]’s mother has just let you know she can see your dick through your underwear? Is a funeral reception an okay place to find a hookup? Is a funeral reception a decent spot for a break-up? Is a funeral reception a good time for a love confession when you know the person you’re confessing to is happy with someone else? And who do you make eye contact with when you can’t look directly at the person asking you if you’re okay when there’s so, so much about you she doesn’t know yet? Even if--for this tiny little moment within a vast swath of many okay and not-okay moments--you’re honest when you tell her that you are?

I fucking adored this episode because it answers all these questions very simply: Show up. Show up for yourself. Show up for your friends. Try not to harm yourself. Try not to harm your friends.

I love that this episode is about the messiness of adulthood and the things we bring with us from childhood and that it takes place partially in Rebecca’s childhood bedroom, and in Ted’s childhood memories. Dwelling in those places (whether physically or mentally) isn’t an automatic recipe for regression, but it does get everyone closer to the things that made them who they are, to the unresolved and half-buried parts of them that still make them tick today.

Forever obsessed with every single detail about Rebecca’s childhood bedroom.

Forever obsessed with Deborah’s decision to Rick Roll herself every single morning of her life.

Forever obsessed with Rebecca’s decision to Rick Roll her father’s funeral as a way to not have to make up a single word about her father and to do something very vulnerable and kind for herself and her mother and everyone.

Forever obsessed with Ted’s decision to Rick Roll Rebecca Rick Rolling her father’s funeral.

Forever obsessed with an entire found family backing it up.

I love that it is Isaac’s leadership that ensures every single member of the team attends the service for Paul.

I am very, very interested in Jamie’s love confession to Keeley because I do think it will spark some reflection in Keeley but I do not think it’ll go the cliched love triangle route.

Each scene with Rebecca and Sam struck (for me, a human being sharing a subjective perspective on the internet) the tender-awkward-beautiful-stressful chord I was hoping it would. I think it’s wonderful that Sam is honest with Rebecca about how difficult it is to keep their relationship a secret, and I love that Rebecca has a million mostly-unarticulated reasons for why she’d much prefer the secret to continue. I like that Sassy, Keeley, and Nora respond to the revelation as friends; they might be tempering their judgments in part because they’ve all gathered to bury Rebecca’s dad, but I don’t think their reactions would’ve been that different even on a happier occasion.

While there are a million and one different reasons why a continued relationship between Rebecca and Sam could cause serious ethical problems, I really love that when people share big news on this show, the people who care about them generally react by trying to see why the person is doing what they’re doing. Doesn’t mean they shouldn’t also hold each other accountable, but in my book it’s OK that Keeley’s first reaction was to feel happy that her friend is having some fun.

Also everyone has been making weird judgment calls this season, and this episode felt like a moment of real breakthroughs in terms of people telling the truth about things that happened to them and leaving themselves open to honest responses from others.

September 13, 1991. It’s so tenderly, beautifully, overwhelmingly meaningful that there’s still so much Ted and Rebecca don’t know about the things they have in common in these parallel lives they’re leading. The scene between Sarah Niles and Jason Sudeikis is so beautifully acted, and so is the scene between Hannah Waddingham and Harriet Walter. The way they intertwine to communicate that Ted and Rebecca basically lost the ability to trust their fathers simultaneously, from an ocean away? In the hands of lesser storytellers, it would feel too perfect a mirroring, but here it feels heartbreakingly imperfect. All the things they still don’t know. All the questions they try to ask each other. All the things they don’t dare ask yet. And then the storytellers are holding a candle up to all of it and letting the audience bask in the glow of this connection even if Ted and Rebecca can’t fully understand it yet.

I am so proud that Rebecca and Deborah were able to embark on the beginnings of a conversation about the ways Deborah and Paul’s relationship might have resembled or not resembled Rebecca and Rupert’s. It feels possible that they could get to a point where Rebecca truly internalizes her mother’s pride that she broke a cycle by leaving Rupert, and could maybe even understand why her mother made the choices she made. I love that in the final scene, they’re still relying on their old mother-daughter conversational patterns—the frustrations, the snippy shorthand, the passive-aggression. Mothers and daughters!

I am also proud that Ted—albeit via a joke about Sharon charging him for the house call—indicates that he understands the value of Sharon’s work. He’s changed a lot, all in realistic ways for someone who loves learning and really does want to meet people where they are and appreciate them. I’m very moved that instead of putting himself in a real harmful situation by showing up to the funeral on time at any cost, he did what he needed to do to take care of himself and accept care from someone else. And then Sharon’s suggestion that he think about things he loved about his father? And the way he’s able to share a positive memory of Rebecca’s own father at a time when she really needed it? Gosh.

Awkward, undecorous transition from 1991 to present-day incoming...but SASSY! She’s just, like, a whirling dervish of loyal friendship and not giving a fuck and penis size discussions and being casually, delightfully cruel to Rupert, who so deserves it. Rebecca was going on a real face journey when Sassy goes off with Ted at the end, and I’m sort of *eyes emoji* about all of that, but I continue to feel like Sassy is the most imperfectly wonderful friend-from-the-past kind of person and I love everything she and Nora get to do in this episode.

Keeley saying “That baby is whack” might be my favorite line in the episode? Maybe the whole show? Not really but really.

FUCK YOU, RUPERT. Bex and Diane, y’all are fine. And I truly feel for Nate...whatever scheme he’s getting suckered into. Whatever insecurity Rupert is preying on. I want Nate to go to therapy, too.

I feel like it was an unpopular opinion at the time, but I loved Rebecca’s 2x1 revelation about vulnerability and fear of getting hurt and needing to let someone love her. Sassy doesn’t always word things in the most nuanced way, but I think there’s a real possibility that she did ask Rebecca to really consider what it means to feel either safe or unsafe with a person but to know that in either circumstance, that person could end up causing her pain. Standing in that closet with Sam, managing to make it clear that she’s not asking for a break because she knows he will hurt her but because she has to figure out how to be with a wonderful person who could cause her pain...the growth, man. Makes me emotional.

I emerged from this episode feeling, of course, stunned by all the amazing parallels and revelations and beautiful acting and Rick Rolls and just, everything. I also emerged feeling sad/raw/tender because messiness and decorum and growth and coping mechanisms and death and dramatic irony and not knowing things about people and not knowing what you don’t know...it’s a sad, raw, tender place to be.

To quote a guy who got a whole sitcom (lol) named after him, life is real hard.

#ted lasso #ted lasso s2 spoilers #meta by me #ted lasso 2x10 #a lesbian watches ted lasso #lotta feelings in here y'all #cw suicide

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itsclydebitches · 3 years

Text

I’ve been seeing an uptick in “anti-RWDE” posts lately — which is a phenomenon I’d like to comment on at a later date — but for now one of them (quite unintentionally) made me realize something about the finale that I haven’t seen others discuss yet.

So RWBYJNOR saves everyone, right? Let’s just put aside the animation for a moment — which didn’t show any army members making it out — as well as the forgotten side characters — Maria, Pietro, Qrow’s group isn’t forgotten, but still left behind — and take things on good faith here. We’ll read the finale through the thematic intention: RWBYJNOR saved “everyone” in the Kingdom of Atlas in Volume 8, deliberately contrasting them with Ironwood who was willing to sacrifice a chunk of the Kingdom in Volume 7. Forget all the messiness and just accept that regardless of the consequences — like a destroyed Kingdom and a “dead” team — the heroes are heroic because they didn’t give into a “lesser evil” thinking and managed to save everyone.

Now, how was that possible?

Let’s go back to the beginning of the seventh episode of Volume 8, “War.” Salem’s grimm have just burrowed through Atlas’ defenses and taken them out. The shields are gone. She flies Monstra into the fields and releases an army of darkness that immediately heads for the city. What’s the very first thing Ironwood does?

Soldier: Yes, sir?

Ironwood: I am evacuating all citizens to the subway. Prepare Manta Squad Omega, and dispatch to every part of Atlas.

Soldier: But sir-

Ironwood: Now!

He evacuates the people, with “the people” meaning all the Atlesians and however many Mantle folk got to the city prior to Salem’s arrival. When this episode aired I mentioned being confused as to why the soldier was so hesitant. Why wouldn’t you want the people to get to safety when a grimm army is heading their way? Fans against Ironwood took the soldier’s side, claiming that Mountain Glenn proved that any underground evacuation is a death sentence and thus he obviously doesn’t really care about the peoples’ safety. Fans in support of/neutral towards Ironwood pointed out that this is a pretty big leap, no one is coming up with a better idea for what he should do instead, and that within these circumstances it reads like the soldiers is illogically against this idea simply because everyone is against Ironwood now. The show wants characters criticizing his decisions and making him out to look like a crazed dictator... even during moments when it doesn’t make any sense to be upset with him. Shooting the councilman yes, trying to keep the people safe no. Basically, this small exchange was a mess, but the rest of the volume proved that this was a sound call. The subway never collapsed and no grimm ever made it to that enclosed space to pick the civilians off like fish in an underground barrel.

So, why didn’t that happen? Well, one answer is because Oscar and Ozpin destroyed the whale. But how did they have time to do that? Without the people dying while they were being tortured, talking to Hazel, escaping with Emerald, fighting Salem, etc.? A lot happened between Salem starting her attack and Oscar ending it, so why wasn’t 2/3rds of the Kingdom’s population decimated during that time?

Because Ironwood sent his army out to keep the grimm occupied.

Outside of Ironwood’s cartoon villain actions — random murders and bomb threats — which get the most attention due to how deliberately, over-the-top horrific they are, these are the two actions that get the most negative attention from both the story and the fanbase. The soldier seems horrified by the order to evacuate. Marrow is devastated that young adults are fighting in this battle. The fandom is disgusted by both aspects of Ironwood’s character: giving orders that, as general, he expects to be obeyed and having an army that follows those orders. Putting side that cartoon villainy, this is what supposedly makes Ironwood the antagonist here. These are the qualities that have existed since Volume 2, resulting in a “he was always a bad guy” interpretation. These are the qualities that have resulted in anyone who likes his character being labeled as a “bootlicker.” We know these qualities make the fandom hate him because otherwise, more people would be confused as to why a presumably heroic character randomly shot Oscar. Orders, armies, and general military associations are at the heart of Ironwood’s presumed villainy.

So let’s remove them.

Ironwood has no evil army. Ironwood gives no evil orders. Power and control lies solely in the hands of our non-military heroes. Everything is better!

...well, no. Because we saw in Volume 8 precisely the choices our heroes made when the attack started: half of them focused on saving a single individual (Oscar) and the other half kept to the sidelines. At no point did our RWB group act after sending the message and prior to securing the Staff. AKA, during the attack of Salem’s army. We got a very explicit moment in which Ruby looked out the window at the battle going on and turned away from it, continuing to discuss ethics instead of joining the fight. The people of Atlas (which, again, includes many Mantle citizens) had no one but Ironwood and his army because a third of the group was trying to rescue Oscar (they never even had a plan to blow up Monstra — that was also Ironwood), a third of the group was up in Amity, and a third was sitting in the mansion. They did nothing to help the people of Atlas being attacked by grimm.

Thus, if you remove Ironwood’s actions, everything goes to hell. There is no longer an order to evacuate to the subway. Maybe some people go there anyway. Most probably don’t. They run in a panic wherever they can. Hide wherever they can. Go back home for some semblance of safety.

There’s no longer an army. Either it doesn’t exist because we’ve determined it’s simplistically bad despite RWBY’s grimm-specific context, or Ironwood likewise never gives the order to protect Atlas’ border. Salem’s army moves unimpeded through the city, killing countless people as it goes. How do we know? Because they’re civilians who can’t defend themselves and there’s literally no one else to help. Remember: Ironwood is not giving orders, there is no army, RWB is in the mansion, YJOR is in the whale, Penny is out of commission, the Happy Huntresses are in Mantle. Those in Atlas are entirely alone. In time, Oscar destroys the whale, but by then it’s too late. There’s no concrete way to theorize how many have died, but it’s inevitably a lot. Everyone else is scatted across the city, trying to survive.

So this scene

no longer exists.

When the group gets the Staff and creates portals for “everyone” to escape through, Mantle is ready to go. They’ve gotten everyone into the crater and can funnel them straight to Vacuo. Atlas, however, is in chaos. When Jaune enters the subway there’s only a few people there, many of which may be wounded or dying. He’s right back where he started, in Mantle at the beginning of Volume 8: needing to go door-to-door to find where people have hidden themselves, trying to convince them all to follow him (remember Oscar commenting to Ozpin about how difficult that was?). Except now, he and Nora are the only ones trying to get people to safey, the city is filled with far more grimm, a significant amount of time has passed for people to be killed or injured (making evacuating them even harder, both due to injuries and an unwillingness to leave hurt/dead/missing loved ones behind), he’s trying to convince these panicking people to go through magic portals, not just walk to a crater, and he’s aware that there’s a very short time limit for this task.

Jaune returns in a panic of his own, explaining how difficult it will be to get that 2/3rds of the Kingdom to Vacuo. How many are already dead. Barricaded. Missing. Closeup on Ruby looking horrified, but then she rallies. They can do it. Atlas is falling, but residual dust gives them just enough time to find, calm, and evacuate those people. They’re heroes after all. Beating the odds is what they do.

Then Cinder attacks.

Suddenly, the group can’t evacuate people because they’re trying to keep themselves safe from her. Maybe Cinder gets the powers because Jaune was off looking for civilians, leaving Penny without a mercy kill. Maybe Nora dies because she’s still trying to help people on the city that plows into the one below. Regardless of how details might change, they’re not getting a spread out, decimated population through those portals before Cinder changes the wish and makes them disappear.

In this version, the story starts with Ironwood wanting to sacrifice 1/3rd of the population to save 2/3rds and the future of the war. It ends with 2/3rds of the population dying instead.

This is what I mean when I say the majority of the fandom wants to view a very complex situation through a ridiculously simple lens. The fandom wants to denounce every bit of RWBY’s fictionalized military, the context issues of that aside. The story wants to paint RWBYJNOR as the only heroes, in part because they succeeded in saving everyone (“everyone”) in the Kingdom when Ironwood gave up.

But they only managed to save everyone because of Ironwood. Because he kept fighting for his people to the bitter end. This is why, though his horrific actions obviously exist in the story, they make no sense (he’ll threaten to kill his people so he can... save his people?) and mess up what little is working in the finale. The story wants us to celebrate the group for evacuating Mantle and Atlas, but the Atlas evacuation would not have happened if not for Ironwood’s actions — the actions that are ignored in favor of having Winter blame him for everything and then killing him off. The rescue of “everyone” was very much a joint effort. RWBYJNOR’s win is not actually a contrast to Ironwood’s intended sacrifice, for the simple reason that their win depended entirely on Ironwood’s actions.

If we’re going to celebrate the group getting everyone to safety, we should probably also celebrate the guy who got them all to an easy evacuation point and ensured they weren’t eaten before then. Does that mean Ironwood never did anything wrong? Of course not. As established, the story went out of its way to make him into a villain. Rather, it means that other parts of the story failed to maintain that black and white view, complicating the heroism of RWBYJNOR in the process. If we want Ironwood to be incapable of heroic action, always the bad guy, nothing good to say about him whatsoever... then we likewise need to accept that the group is rather unheroic in many regards too. That, on their own, they would have failed to save everyone, just as Ironwood’s plan failed to save everyone at the end of Volume 7. Because they chose their friend over a kingdom. Because they sat around in a mansion. Because by the time they took action again and tried to escape, without Ironwood’s help they would have lost a larger majority than they originally insisted be saved.

#rwby #rwde #mymetas

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xxxsweetdreamzxxx · 3 years

Text

warnings/tags: dom!wonho sub!reader, fluff, smut, fanfic; cursing, railing, unprotected sex, hook up, size kink, other types of filth

summary: your first encounter with your new nextdoor neighbor turns steamy

word count: 2k

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Had this dream and decided that Wonho was a good fit to replace the rando my mind made up. Didn't require much editing, so this is straight from my messed up subconscious. Hope you enjoy!! ;>

and yes, I am a certified Wonho simp. (′ꈍᴗꈍ‵)

===============================

You glanced up past the tops of the skyscrapers of Manhattan at the gray sky and sighed, pulling your coat tighter around you in the cool air. Seeing the older structure that was your apartment building in front of you, waves of relief washed through you. Getting excited to head inside and warm up a little, you thought: 'Another day of work over, time to relax.' But as you neared the entrance, you heard a voice behind you.

"Goddamn." A man muttered under his breath. "What's your name?" He said a little louder so you could hear, his tone indicating obvious interest.

Fighting back a sigh and without looking his way, you replied: "Sorry, I'm not interested."

Despite wanting to desperately go inside, you turned and headed back the way you came, thankful he didn't follow. You figured it wasn't a good idea for him to know where you lived. Once out of sight of your building, you decided it was probably safe to head back.

Approaching your building for the second time, you could see no one stood outside the building, so you entered. Heading up one flight of stairs onto the second floor, you made your way into the hallway and to the second door, reaching into your pocket for your keys. Unlocking your apartment door, you went in and closed the door behind you.

Glancing around, you could see your bed in the corner, the small two-person couch against the opposite wall, and the kitchenette near the door that consisted of only a mini fridge and tiny stovetop. The wall furthest from the door had a window with it's curtains drawn to the sides, letting natural light in. A door along the wall with the couch lead to your bathroom. You didn't mind living in a one room apartment much, its location was amazing - and something you cared more about then the square footage.

Setting your keys down on top of the mini fridge, you changed into some more comfortable shorts before moving towards the couch, reaching for the remote that was on the armrest as you sat down. Flipping on the TV situated across from you, you turned on the show you were watching last night before bed. Taking place in the 1920s or so, it was about some rich influential family and their daily lives. Of course, more drama filled than it would've been in reality. One of the younger couples in the family had been slowly growing closer, and you were just waiting for them to hook up. You secretly hoped today's episode would deliver.

To your delight, it didn't take long for the episode to go where you wanted, with the couple locking themselves in a bedroom late at night and climbing onto their canopy bed. The girl's soft moans made you turn down the volume and pray to god that no one could hear anything through your thin apartment walls. It began to pour outside your window, thankfully drowning out some of the noises coming from your TV. You curled yourself up in a ball and watched the semi-pornographic scene play out, feeling satisfied in the direction the show was going.

You were so wrapped up in the show that it took a second for you to process that the sound you heard was a knock at your door.

"Fuck." you hissed under your breath, scrambling to pause the show on a frame that wasn't too suspicious.

You left the remote on the seat you'd been sitting on and hurried over to the door, which didn't have a peep hole so there was no way to see the person on the other side.

"Yes?" You question through the door.

A man's voice answered. "Sorry to bother you, but I forgot the key to my apartment nextdoor and got caught in the rain on the way back from work. I don't have anything out here to dry off with and my roommate doesn't get back until a few hours from now. Could I please borrow a towel?"

He sounded familiar somehow, you felt like you'd heard his voice recently but couldn't place where. He did sound desperate...

You opened the door. The poor guy was drenched and shivering, and looked at you in embarrassment. His expression then seemed to turn to recognition of some kind. Even though the way he carried himself seemed sweet and innocent, he was tall and you could tell that under layers of winter clothing was nothing but muscle. Despite feeling a little uneasy being alone with such a large man, you beckoned him to come inside.

You took in his appearance further as he hesitated a bit before doing so. His wet dark hair was plastered flat across his forehead, his equally dark eyes looked tired. His red cheeks and nose stood out against his pale skin, and you wondered how long he'd been out in the cold. Even in such a disheveled state, his perfect visuals made you feel flushed in the face. He was prettier than any man - no, person - you'd met before.

"I- I'm y/n by the way." You wanted to slap yourself for stuttering. "You can stay here until your roommate gets back, I'd hate for you to be standing in the hallway the whole time."

"I'm Hoseok," The man replied, "and I can't thank you enough." He smiled gratefully at you, making your heart skip a beat.

You averted your gaze to quickly duck into the bathroom, getting him a towel. You gave it to him and showed him where he could sit on your couch, the seat next to where you'd been sitting before. You could notice he was still shivering after sitting down.

"Would you like some hot tea to warm you up?" You asked.

He gave you another grateful smile. "Yes."

You headed over to the kitchenette to heat up some water, pulling out two mugs for your tea. You continued the conversation, talking about work, the weather, city life, etc. until before long you'd finished making the tea and headed back to the couch to keep talking, sitting down next to him.

You learned he was a mailman of all things, and funnily enough he delivered mail to the building you both lived in. He'd moved in with his roommate only recently, an old friend from high school. You'd met the roommate a few times, out in the hallway and such. You had no idea a second person had moved in.

Then there was a pause in the conversation, and his eyes drifted over to the TV. He noticed that it was on, but paused.

"What you watching?" He asked in a teasing tone.

"Oh, ummm," you trailed off, "It's nothing."

"Can I see?" He teased further, a slight smirk on his lips. "Its nothing bad is it?"

"No, I just forgot to turn it off." You say quickly.

At that, you went to grab the remote where it lay, on the opposite side of you than he was. A bit surprised by your quick motions, he tried to reach over you to grab it and press play, curiosity overtaking him. Trying to reach that far caused him to lean over quite a bit, too much. Nearly collapsing on top of you, the weight of his body pushed you down onto the couch underneath him. You yelp in surprise.

Completely engulfed in his shadow, you look up at him, who seems equally surprised by the awkward position he got you both into. He held himself up with his arms on either side of you, but didn't climb off. You can see blush across his cheeks, your own face feeling hot. Something in his previously sweet and tired eyes changes, and his eyes move down to your lips.

The next thing you know, your lips are crashing against his, and he pulls you into an upright position, placing you on his lap. He runs his fingers through your hair; neither of you stopping to take a breath. You can feel your panties already starting to get damp, clinging to your clit. Moaning softly against his lips, you began to grind your hips against his, feeling a growing bulge underneath you. Seeing this as an invitation, he swiftly picks you up and starts moving you across the room in the direction of your bed.

Without unlocking his lips from yours, he splayed you out across your bedsheets beneath him. The feeling of being trapped under him only makes you wetter. He begins to grind his hips in rhythm with yours, the fabric of your shorts and his pants brushing against each other. His hands begin to feel you up, finding every curve on your body through your clothes. He then takes them down to the waistband of your shorts, wasting no time in using it to pull them off, along with your panties.

He then tugs impatiently at your shirt, and you help him to remove it before placing your hands on his belt, fumbling with the clasp. He tugs his shirt over his head before helping you to remove his belt and then his pants. You use your own hands to explore his abdomen, feeling his hard abs between your fingertips. He definitely worked out a ton.

You then felt his erection brush against your inner thigh, more apparent through the much thinner fabric of his boxers. Although, you wanted to feel it without the boxers. Your hands drifted lower, letting him know to remove them. He did so without hesitation, groaning in satisfaction now that his cock was freed from any restrictive fabric. The pace of your kisses slowed down a little as he spread your legs a bit more, then teased your folds with his tip. The contact with your dripping pussy caused you to moan louder than before.

He moved his lips onto your neck, marking you as you waited for his next move - which apparently was slamming into you hard like a truck. You sharply sucked in a breath and unintentionally clenched your walls around his dick, causing him to moan against your neck. Tears rolled down your cheeks, caused by momentary pain. Relaxing a bit, you tried your best to match your thrusts with his again. He pushed in forcefully until he was balls deep. He was so large, he filled you up completely.

Seeing your sweat and tears, he looks into your eyes with slight concern and speaks for the first time in minutes. "You okay?"

"Mhmhmm." Is all you can reply. In reality you were much better than okay.

He presses his lips back onto yours before pulling out and ramming back into you aggressively several times, causing lewd noises to escape you both. Feeling his orgasm approaching he pulls out quickly, leaving you a sweaty mess. Only seconds later hot strings of cum splash against your inner thighs, spilling onto the bedsheets. Squirming a little at the tenseness there, you begin to move your hand down but he pins it to the bed, making you whine.

"So needy." He comments before using his own fingers to rub fast circles on your clit.

You arch your back - somehow him doing that feels better than you could ever make it feel. It doesn't take long before a feeling near your tummy begins to build up, your hips grinding a little faster. Before you can remove your lips from his to warn him, you release onto his hand, your nerves relaxing as you ride out your orgasm beneath him. He pauses to lick you off of his fingers, causing you to blush.

"Fuck, you taste so good."

After finishing every last bit, he lies down next to you onto the bed, snuggling you up against him. All of the sudden it seems he's gone back to his sweet and innocent self, despite what just occurred. Your kisses become softer until you eventually stop, he wraps his arms around you, and you bury your head into his chest. After a while, he speaks out in a soft and quiet voice.

"So, what was it you were watching?"

You smile bashfully. "It was a sex scene in a show I've been watching."

He chuckles and pulls you closer. "You're so cute y/n."

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