#...like they see us as people but it's more like they see us as Trans People and not... people...

[opencommunion]

one reason (white) queer people misuse the term homonationalism is that they see queerness (or whatever you want to call it) as naturally disaffiliated with the US empire. so they understand homonationalism as a divergence from a natural mutual antagonism between queerness and empire. they talk about homonationalism as if it's an exclusively "normie gay" project, and as if it's a divergence from, rather than a consequence of, the overall trajectory of western lgbtqia+ politics. ironically it’s that self-exceptionalization by the queer, on the basis of their queerness, that imbricates them in homonationalism. they produce themselves as a homonationalist subject, and reproduce homonationalism, every time they articulate their queerness as individualized freedom. and Puar actually anticipates all of this in her original theorization of homonationalism in Terrorist Assemblages, and that's why it really helps to go to the text instead of osmosing queer theory solely through tumblr posts (esp when tumblr is so white and the queer theorists are not): "Some may strenuously object to the suggestion that queer identities, like their 'less radical' counterparts, homosexual, gay, and lesbian identities, are also implicated in ascendant white American nationalist formations, preferring to see queerness as singularly transgressive of identity norms. This focus on transgression, however, is precisely the term by which queerness narrates its own sexual exceptionalism.

While we can point to the obvious problems with the emancipatory, missionary pulses of certain (U.S., western) feminisms and of gay and lesbian liberation, queerness has its own exceptionalist desires: exceptionalism is a founding impulse, indeed the very core of a queerness that claims itself as an anti-, trans-, or unidentity. The paradigm of gay liberation and emancipation has produced all sorts of troubling narratives: about the greater homophobia of immigrant communities and communities of color, about the stricter family values and mores in these communities, about a certain prerequisite migration from home, about coming-out teleologies. We have less understanding of queerness as a biopolitical project, one that both parallels and intersects with that of multiculturalism, the ascendancy of whiteness, and may collude with or collapse into liberationist paradigms. While liberal underpinnings serve to constantly recenter the normative gay or lesbian subject as exclusively liberatory, these same tendencies labor to insistently recenter the normative queer subject as an exclusively transgressive one. Queerness here is the modality through which 'freedom from norms' becomes a regulatory queer ideal that demarcates the ideal queer. ... I am thinking of queerness as exceptional in a way that is wedded to individualism and the rational, liberal humanist subject, what [Sara] Ahmed denotes as 'attachments' and what I would qualify as deep psychic registers of investment that we often cannot account for and are sometimes best seen by others rather than ourselves. 'Freedom from norms' resonates with liberal humanism’s authorization of the fully self-possessed speaking subject, untethered by hegemony or false consciousness, enabled by the life/stylization offerings of capitalism, rationally choosing modern individualism over the ensnaring bonds of family. In this problematic definition of queerness, individual agency is legible only as resistance to norms rather than complicity with them, thus equating resistance and agency.

... Queerness as automatically and inherently transgressive enacts specific forms of disciplining and control, erecting celebratory queer liberal subjects folded into life (queerness as subject) against the sexually pathological and deviant populations targeted for death (queerness as population). Within that orientation of regulatory transgression, queer operates as an alibi for complicity with all sorts of other identity norms, such as nation, race, class, and gender, unwittingly lured onto the ascent toward whiteness. ... To be excused from a critique of one’s own power manipulations is the appeal of white liberalism, the underpinnings of the ascendancy of whiteness, which is not a conservative, racist formation bent on extermination, but rather an insidious liberal one proffering an innocuous inclusion into life."

Jasbir K. Puar, Terrorist Assemblages: Homonationalism in Queer Times (2007)

#library #imperialism

[hollyhomburg]

Before I Leave You (Pt. 69)

(Sneek Peek)(Omegaverse au, Mafia au, Bts x Reader)

Summary: The pack meet with moonbyul to discuss terms.

Tags: Violence, Angst with the happy ending on the horizon, fluff if you squint, Yoongi gets really really angry and kinda triggers the, allusions to past abuse, Blood, manipulative behavior, trans! tae, Transphobia,

W/c: 11.0k

A/n: woooooo we're finally here!! can you belive it???? this chapter may feel like an ending in a sense because it is an end of all the mafia parts. truly- after this chapter we won't see any more violence or blood or anything close to the last 6. it's all happy endings from here <3 Thank you for sticking with it!

Previous part - Masterlist - First part

Sneek Peek:

Yoongi waits for everyone to buckle their seat belt but you don’t, frozen watching him in the window, the rearview mirror when he gets into the front seat. Yoongi doesn’t even get around to starting the car, sliding the key home but the beep goes once, twice, and then a third time because you don't have your seatbelt buckled. The others wait in silence. 

“Yoongi-“

“Fuck!” The curse is loud and perfunctory. He kicks open his door again with a stream of spat explicative. Slamming it shut this time. The others don't say anything, completely silent in the face of his anger.

Yoongi doesn't get angry. You've never seen him like this before. 

He wrenches your door open and for a horrible moment, you think he's going to yank you out of it and tell you to get lost. 

Yoongi's murmuring things to himself, so low that you almost can't make out what he's saying as he pushes himself into the back seat. The backseat of the Lambo isn’t that large. Hardly big enough to fit two people let alone four. Jungkook lets out a belated “Hey!” but Hoseok just reaches around him and unlocks the door for him to get out. Jimin is already out of the passenger seat and heading in the direction of the driver's side as Yoongi scrambles with your seat belt, jerking it over your shoulder and slamming it home.

"-Fucking asshole- of all the stupid omegas in the world I had to be mated to the fucking- dumbest- little- fucking-" The belt digs into your shoulder extra tight and Jimin starts the car wordlessly. 

You're closed in on both sides by him and Hobi on the other. 

They switch and shuffle. Jimin pulls away from the train station, gentler this time but still faster and with more finesse than you'd do it. Yoongi is still looking at you, glaring, tears in his eyes with wet cheeks, his voice low and uncompromising. 

“Give me your phone.” 

“My what?”

“Your. Phone. You used it to call her didn’t you?” You nod after a second, slowly pulling it from your sweatshirt pocket and handing it over. 

Yoongi takes your phone and breaks it over his thigh.

It’s a bit impressive really- the show of strength. He brings it down once and the screen breaks, winking out like a shooting star. Another and it bends just a little, a third time- and it’s practically at a right angle. It breaks so easily in the face of adrenaline and anger and fear. 

You make a small noise, not a whimper but a descending sound. Yoongi raises his eyebrows at you, wild. Like he’ll break even further if you complain. Hoseok’s not sure he’s ever seen Yoongi this broken. Never.

"Just- There were pictures of Noodle and Tae on there.”

Fear and anger are an intoxicating mix to anyone- let alone someone who almost lost their person. He goes at your phone until its jagged edge bites into his hand drawing blood. Then he tosses both pieces of your phone onto the floor of the car like they're paperweights. 

One of the pieces hits your shoe with a small metal clink, and even hobi looks down in surprise at the sound. 

Yoongi laughs and then bends over. yanking the gun out of your boot. Small, shoved there. Hoseok didn’t notice. He's not sure why it surprises him- that you'd be armed. You're not an idiot, you know the risks, and you were armed the last time that you tried to run away.  

He holds it out to you, long fingers wrapped around the barrel pointed at his chest. The handle facing you, the barrel of the gun level with his heart.

“You want to do the honors sweetheart?”

Coming Saturday April 27th At 5pm EST (Time Zone Adjustments Below)

#bts omegaverse au #bts a/b/o #bts x reader #bts poly au #bts gang au #bts mafia au #bts polyamory au #bts au #bts fluff #bts hurt/comfort #bts werewolf au #bts angst bts omegaverse fic #bts hybrid fic #min yoongi fic #kim namjoon fic #kim seokjin fic #kim taehyung fic #park jimin fic #jeon jungkook fic #jjk #pjm #myg #knj #kth #ksj #jhs #jung hoseok fic #min yoongi x reader #kim namjoon x reader #kim seokjin x reader

[latteandjacks]

"They should've made an emphasis on Sallie May being trans before" "There should be things that openly indicate she's trans aside from the horns" "The merch shouldn't show her with a bulge if she's trans, logically she should hide it"

My brother in Christ shut the fuck up

Aight, I get where most of you are coming from but let me just say that Sallie May is a big breath of fresh air from a lot of canon trans rep I've been seeing in the internet about big projects such as Helluva Boss, let's go point from point

This contains spoilers from Hell's Belles

Sallie May is a transgender Imp, this is not something that was decided just now for the short as her first appearance in the moon harvest festival already shows her with the thick line horns (Which are exclusively from AMAB (Assigned Male at Birth) Imps

If there's only one point these people made that I agree with is the fact that the horns thing should be something implied in the show, not specifically with the intention of outing a trans character but something simple that could give more context for those who do not check the wikis or the social medias that often

Other than that, I feel like they haven't actually meet a trans person irl because they believe that her being trans should be something that everyone should catch the first time they see her, that someone should inmeditaly point out she's trans, yet, they get upset at the fact that she's proudly showing a bulge on the merchandise They want the show to scream verbally about her being trans but not casually

You have no idea how relieved I felt when, at no point in the episode, her being trans was mentioned or outed, none pointed out her horns or voice and instead the problem was her feeling left out of her sister's life, and, again, not because she's trans and feels like Millie doesn't view her the same or some bullshit, but because Millie doesn't go home as often and felt a bit mad when she had to do her work In fact! Her not getting genitalia reconstructive surgery is also a thing that is cool about her, she got tits but didn't chop off the dick and is not insecure about it, most of times trans people are put between not getting surgery or getting ALL of the surgeries AND being extremely insecure about their genitalia, and yes, there's a lot of trans people that feel that way, but I think that aspect of her is really good representation for those that don't want to get surgery or only want to either reduce or enlarge their chest, not everyone gets dysphoria the same way and this doesn't make her less of a woman for that

Even if it's okay to have characters where one of the main issue of the comes from being trans (I have a few myself), It's also nice to see character that are trans but the main issue with their life comes from something completely different and not related

So for people upset about her passing so well you can't immediately tell she's trans Surprise! That's a lot of us want, that's what a lot trans people irl try, to just be a person of the gender we really are, to be normal and not needing to always out of ourselves, to be treated the same no matter what I make a lot of jokes about my lack of dick and my excess of tits, I only out myself as trans when formally presenting to someone and that is just because I'm not allowed to be trans so I don't pass as a boy at all and need to specify, but me being trans is something that most of my friend only bring into the conversation to make a friendly joke or when I bring it up

Sallie May is not only good representation, is one of the best I've seen in a while in the modern adult media, because she's subtle yet obvious You may not like Viv (Me too girl /non gendered), but I got to give it to her, the lgbt+ representation she does is on point

Anyways now that I tackled down that issue is time to actually talks about this short as a whole see ya

#helluva boss #helluva boss sallie may #helluva boss millie #helluva boss spoilers #hell's belles

[ferrstappen]

mónaco l Carlos Sainz

(a/n): this is a very short piece based on one of my favorite songs of all time which, by coincidence, is called Mónaco by Lagos and Danny Ocean. If you listen to it you can picture yourself having a summer romance with Carlos, true story. I'd love to dive deeper into it, but idk I just needed to get it out fast for some reason. hope you like it, feedback is always welcomed<3

summary: pero si algo que nos quedó es todo lo que pasó en Mónaco (but if there’s something left in us then it’s everything that happened in Monaco)

no sé si te acuerdes, de la vez que nos perdimos en septiembre

she'd never forget the warm september night when Carlos took her to the casino for the first time. He still wasn't very familiar with the principality and she was just a fleeting person for a couple of weeks, months, and he couldn't count on her of all people to know the streets of the heavenly Monaco.

As the flutes of Don Perignon continued to flow, he became more and more animated, trying his best to explain the intricate science behind poker and the true meaning behind each card. But despite his best efforts, she found herself unable to concentrate on his words. Instead, she was deeply lost in his eyes, taking in every detail of his sparkling hazel hue.

As she continued to stare, he finally noticed the piercing gaze, causing a warm flush to rise in his cheeks. A shy smile appeared on his lips, and she couldn't resist the urge to lean in and place a gentle kiss on them and when she pulled away, his smile grew wider making her fall deeper and deeper in this announced tragedy.

Everything was good until Carlos realized he was drunk, couldn't drive and didn't remember his address, eyes growing comically large as he came to terms that his alcohol-consumed brain really couldn't remember the name of his street, meaning someone had to drive him and his companion through the beautifully and carefully lit streets until one of you started to recognize his complex and as unusual and absurd of a situation they were in, she couldn't stop giggling as the streets kept passing by in a blur and watched Carlos still trying his best to remember.

tantas veces que tomé tres escalas para verte, creo que me acostumbré a tenerte como si no fuera a acabar.

her time in Monaco was over and Carlos' career in Toro Rosso was steadily climbing, he couldn't afford to take his mind off the track and she understood, she was willing to fly over just to see him.

but it started to fade away.

she was still willing to deal with three layovers to see Carlos, and his caramel eyes still sparkled when he saw her, but there was something missing, this wasn't like their late nights in strolling around Monaco, drinking cheap wine even if they could afford a way nicer bottle.

they weren't stupid, this wasn't meant to last any longer than a couple weeks in autumn, a simple memory, one of those people you can close your eyes and feel their scent, mind playing tricks that maybe if they closed their eyes long enough they might get a feel of the soft skin of each other, running her thumb through his cheek while he tried to fall asleep.

yo sé que para volver ya es tarde, y nuestro plan nunca fue quedarse, no sé si habrá una segunda parte, pero si hay algo que nos quedó es todo lo que pasó en Mónaco.

she stopped flying over, Carlos stopped asking her to spend the weekends off in his apartment, just the two of them

Both reminded themselves this wasn't meant to last, wasn't supposed to create one single string, but they both failed.

chances were, they would find each other again maybe on another holiday, another masters degree, PhD, Grand Prix; a part two, a proper goodbye to te September walks in heels she couldn't take off in order to not get a fine, pouting so Carlos would carry her on his back, as if they knew each other their entire lives.

it wasn't important now.

all they had left was what happened in Monaco.

-------------------------------------------------

translations <3

no sé si te acuerdes, de la vez que nos perdimos en septiembre: i don't know if you remember about the time we got lost in September.

tantas veces que tomé tres escalas para verte, creo que me acostumbré a tenerte como si no fuera a acabar: so many times i took three layovers just to see you, I think I got used to having you as if it was never gonna end.

yo sé que para volver ya es tarde, y nuestro plan nunca fue quedarse, no sé si habrá una segunda parte, pero si hay algo que nos quedó es todo lo que pasó en Mónaco: i know it's too late to come back and staying wasn't our plan, i don't know if there's gonna be a second time, but if something's that's left in us is everything that happened in Monaco.

#carlos sainz x you #carlos sainz x reader #carlos sainz imagine #carlos sainz fanfic #carlos sainz fluff #carlos sainz blurb #carlos sainz au #carlos sainz angst #f1 fluff #f1 fics #f1 imagine #f1 fic #f1 fanfic #f1 x reader #f1 x you

[decolonize-the-left]

If Americans shouldn't vote for Biden what should they do instead? Vote for trump? Vote third party? Not vote?

(I know most people would probably ask you this in bad faith but I'm just really distraught at the state of politics and keep hearing people say "don't say he's the only option and don't support him" but there's never alternatives given and I don't know what an effective alternative could even be)

I think a good place to start that a lot of people are comfortable with is probably volunteering and petitioning for 3rd parties to make sure they Do have ballot access next year. So that ppl Can vote for someone else next year.

And yes, vote 3rd party this election. Or don't vote at all.

Besides that? Learn some basic defense and join protests. Support encampments and do things leftists say like join a union and organize your own community whether it be your schoolmates, coworkers, or all your friends and their friends.

Y'all see the news right?

Censorship and propaganda are rampant right now, along with transphobia and racism and even Nazis are back. Tensions are high to say the least and everyone is worked up about the election and Israel.

Figure out what you wish someone else would do and then do it. Is that de-arresting protesters? Organizing a bail fund, fighting cops and throwing tear gas back at them when they make things violent?

There's a lot to fight against and even more to fight for. Find what's worth fighting for (to you) and actually start fighting for it. Don't let cops or your principal or boss or anyone else stop you.

I think one of the most important things we can do right now is remind the government and those that serve the government that they won't take our rights so easily. That if they want to silence us then we're gonna make sure it'll hurt more than it'll help. That we can and will fight back.

And that's why it's so vital that we show them we won't settle either. We won't vote for Biden.

We settled for Clinton and look where that got us.

Does it feel like voting for more and more conservative blue candidates actually helped prevent harm? Or does it feel like you were manipulated and lied to?

Gonna be real, it feels like the government is a manipulative abuser and we're all it's gaslit victims who don't want to believe things are that bad just cuz he killed someone else instead of us.

Which is like...it doesn't mean good things for us that our government could do that and we'd rationalize it, you know?

How we want to get out of this fucked up dynamic is up to us. We work, we pay taxes, we listen to the governments rule of law, and still our government won't codify rights, our trans friends are being abused by the government, or it's banning apps with censorship. And the whole time it's telling us to shut up and be grateful it isn't worse.

Abusers never ever tell you that it could be better too. And they don't want you to know that. Cuz then you leave. And if you leave then they can't manipulate and abuse you.

So yeah. They'll shit on us for doing Anything that doesn't result in us staying, for doing anything that results in us choosing our own well being instead of theirs.

But that's what we need to do.

And you need support before you do that. That's what organizing is. It's like calling the besties who hype you up to leave your shitty ex. Except it's a bunch of people agreeing to support each other when they choose to stand up for something. Organizing is making sure there are people watching back and making sure if one of you is harmed or arrested that there'll be someone there to help bail you out.

The more people you have to bail you out, the less you have to worry about being outnumbered, spoken over, or physically stopped with force.

So yeah. Do that.

Organize. I hope I stressed that enough. The people on our front lines need us to be there for them as much we need Them to keep fighting for us.

Also since I'm here: make sure you and your friends don't talk shit about protesters even when they get violent and break shit. It's not abuse when the victim finally hits back at their abuser, it's self defense.

#asked #answered #idk #kinda just want politicians to start dying tbh

[cosmic-ghost-hermit]

Hey everyone. I am back for a little bit to let yall know im working on making a divination discord server. I have some other things i need to set up before i open it up to the public but im very excited to see yall there! Remember to take what resonates and leave the rest behind but always be open to new experiences. 🩵

-ghost

PILE 1

Crystal: Amethyst

Astrology: ♈️♌️♐️♒️

Vibes: 💛📝🔑💰🚧🎷🏆⚜️🔆🍻🍯🧀🍋🌦️🌻🐝🐣🐱🤲🫨🥱🍰🎾🎗️🏵️🚜🏜️🎁☢️☣️⚠️🚸🔱

Hi there, pile one! So this one is pretty dang straight forward. I see you embracing motherhood. This could be literal motherhood and you could be participating in raising a child but I also see it could be a pet. It definitely looks like it is a little bit of a surprise to everyone involved. I do need to warn you. I can see someone who says they’re on your corner trying to sabotage the situation. It could be purposeful but it also could be accidental. They could just be scared of such a big commitment. Make sure you are equally spreading out the work and everyone is carrying some of the weight of this commitment. There will be chaos if things are not equally distributed. Have everyone research how to help and read up on important information so everyone is on the same page. A village is needed to raise a child but if the village isn’t in harmony. All must be in tandem when raising a little one. If someone isn’t following along with everyone else make sure you are strict about how things are meant to be done. Do not let your village stray from the path. Keep nasty people away from this baby.

PILE 2

Crystal: Black Tourmaline

Astrology: ♉️♏️♓️♊️

Vibes: 🏳️‍🌈🌺🌈🦄💐🥗🍭🛼🎡🚦🎉🎊❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🛍️🌄🏩🏕️🎭🍎🍊🍋🍏🫐🍆🍇🍡🍬

Hellooo, pile 2! Your new journey is a self help adventure. You have been gaslit a lot in your life and I see you learning how to use discernment and seeing right through people's lies and straight to the truth. Your presence is becoming a truth serum for all that surrounds you. Your way more powerful than others have coerced you into believing. You have been polishing your skills in private and now you get to shine like the diamond in the rough you are. This journey might not even be something you notice as it comes and goes. You have proved yourself enough already. Allow yourself to stop filling the cups of others and take time to fill your own. If you do not you will eventually dull that shine and become just like those who coerced you. You have the choice to choose a different fate than the one they chose.

PILE 3

Crystal: Rainbow Moonstone

Astrology: ♎️♊️♏️♉️

Vibes: 💜💖🏳️‍⚧️🎀🫐🔮❄️🍆💠🍧🌸🐬🌷🪻🩵☂️🐙👙🚺👛💎🫦🦋😈💦☯️🩻💞🧷

Hi, pile 3! Your new adventure is a gender expression journey. You will be exploring femininity to its core. Femininity might not be something you are very familiar with but you are learning about using your charm and charisma to get what you desire. You are realizing how much your appearance means to you and how to use it in manifestation. It might be kind of scary to you due to some kind of trauma. I see you could be trans-feminine but i also see you being a cis woman and just afraid of what might happen if you use your appearance like that. The patriarchy is definitely terrifying so I understand the apprehension. Use your appearance for justice. Use your feminine charm for your desires. Do not fear because you are protected by spirit. I see Gaia looking after you while you explore your Empress energy.

PILE 4

Crystal: Flower Agate

Astrology: ♋️♓️♑️♒️

Vibes: 🖤❤️💯🕹️🎸♟️🎳🍉🎮🎹🍒🍓🔌🍎🚬🔥🪨👹🔪🥵🥊🛞🕷️🕸️🐞🦊👠♦️🧣🕶️💋💄♣️

Heyooo, pile 4! Oh my goodness this is exciting. Your new adventure is steeped in love. Romantic, platonic and familial love surround your lonely heart. You were a very lonely kid but now love is filling your life. Suitors are at every turn and you get to hand pick who gets to love you. Make sure you are using good discernment when choosing. Look into the future at what heart longs for and aim for it using that criteria. Your values should align with those you love and they should respect you. Don’t go for those who don't make you feel sparks. Don’t bet on boring or mean people because you deserve to be adored.

PILE 5

Crystal: Dragons Blood Jasper

Astrology: ♏️♍️♋️♌️

Vibes: 🖤🩵❤️🤍✒️⚗️📌🎹🎼💎🧲🎲🎱🧊🍷🫖🦨❄️🔥☁️🐧🦋🎒👟🕶️🪢🥼🫀🥶♠️

Pile 5, welcome to your reading. You are opening doors that you can not close. You are beginning a spiritual journey. It also looks like you are nearing the end of another journey. This journey is meant to take a lot of self reflection. You must stare into your shadow until you love it as much as you love your light. You must look at the part of you that disgust you with love and acceptance. Which believe me I am aware that is much easier said than done but you are ready! You can do this! Seek out a spiritual teacher or a therapist to show you the ropes of shadow work. Facing this alone is scary and it is much easier when you have someone to help guide you through the dark. The universe loves you and wants you to love you as much as it does.

#tarot #tarot reading #astrology #pick a crystal #pick a pile #tarot pick a card #crystals #pick a card #spiritualgrowth #spiritual awakening #spirit #spirituality #shadow work #adventure

[self-loving-vampire]

Some other warnings about the future:

1- Conservatives are also starting to fearmonger about birth control and declining birth rates as well. The Heritage Foundation has even openly spoken against recreational and consequence-free sex as a whole.

That's the extremely well-funded organization that wrote up Project 2025 and one of the handful (along with the likes of ADF) that has been pushing anti-trans legislation.

They have already begun to move towards trying to ban contraception.

They are already using the very same judgments and arguments that were crafted to ban abortion and transition for minors against contraceptives. They won't get rid of them overnight, but at the very least I think we'll see a lot of "concern" about birth control pills being too much like abortion, or experimental, or excessively harmful to one's health.

2- Future studies looking into detransition are going to have to distinguish between people who detransitioned willingly and those who were forcefully detransitioned by the government in these last few years where we have seen literally hundreds of anti-trans laws being pushed in multiple countries.

The youth map for anti-trans legislation in the United States currently looks like this.

More than half the country has enacted laws meant to detransition people, and adults have had their healthcare affected as well. Some politicians and organizations are explicitly calling for trans adulthood to start at age 26. A total ban is their stated endgame and minors are just the more acceptable initial target to do this incrementally.

There's the current mess in the UK too.

If these people are classified as detransitioners without the context that this was forced on them, it is going to inflate the numbers. Those numbers are then going to be used to justify even more control over trans people's bodies. Look at the growing numbers of detransitioners (that we created against their will)!

#transphobia

[leonsleftbicep]

Bake Me Back To Eden

Chapter: I

Ao3 Version

Word Count: 1,375

tags: Bakery AU, Modern Setting AU, Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Getting Together, Getting to Know Each Other, Vessel/II/III are dating, IV doesn't know them… yet!, Trans II, Nonbinary Vessel, Genderfluid III, They/Them Pronouns for III, It/Its and They/Them Pronouns for Vessel, Vessel and III are very creature they deserve creature pronouns

Summary: IV runs a bakery called Ivy Sprigs Bakery & Records, The Echo's work along with him. II, III, and Vessel are customers that don't yet know IV. yet! -- this is being cross posted on here and Ao3. alt names that are more "human" are used at times for the vessels, but i try my hardest to keep up with the numerical names for parts that are not being spoken verbally. The echo's or the esparas have made up names as well for i do not know their actual names and don't really want to use their actual names.

the alt names i will be using for each vessel and espara is listed below. please keep in mind that these names are fake and not anyone's actual names.

Vessel: Verna II: lii III: Thea IV: Ivy Espera/Echo 1: Evaline Espera/Echo 2: Erie Espera/Echo 3: Elanor

---

Ivy Sprig Bakery and Records. A newer place that opened up just a walk away from Vessel’s house. It was II’s idea to check out the bakery, after the couple of times he bought coffee there on his way to work. He thought it was time to show them this cute little hobbit hole of a bakery. 

III was apprehensive about all of this, not knowing if they would like anything. Vessel was just nervous in general. Vess hates going out in public, everyone stares at them because of its height. II might be the only one not nervous, for the main reason that he knew there was a certain person he had a feeling that would change their minds. 

The three of them walking through an alleyway while II led the way. “ii are you gonna kill us or something, this is shady.” III says unnerved by this as they hold Vessel's hand. “where almost there, you know i'm not a big fan of main roads for numerous reasons” II smiles as he walks, taking a turn that leads to the front of Ivy Sprigs. “Here we are” II exclaimed as the two taller beings look at this lovely little bakery, with a dark cottage core almost witchy vibe to it. “I call dibs on the records!” III calls out before they run into the cafe. Both II and Vessel giggle as they hold hands and walk into the bakery. 

they find III already scouring the records for old albums from a band they enjoy. III does squeak and bounce around when they find a limited edition color variant of a record.

“I'll go get coffee, while you watch him” II speaks softly to Vessel as he gets up on his tippy toes just to kiss Vessel's cheek. Which makes the taller blush and hum in agreement. 

II making his way to the cafe/bakery section of the shop, he knew III and Vess would be on their way soon after III found their records. II gets in line and soon feels the presence of his two tall lovers, which calms his paranoia.

III’s jaw drops to the floor all of a sudden. II just chuckles when he feels Vessel also fluster, just by the way they are clutching onto II’s shoulder. “I told you guys I would change your minds” II say with a grin as he also checks out the person they are collectively looking at.

The person in question is a lovely brunette with grays at his temples and widows peak, thin wire oval glasses low on his nose as he smiles and talks to customers. ‘Ivy’ was the name on his apron, which if they all thought right he was the owner. II had met the man a couple of times, though never really had a super meaningful conversation with him. 

“How can i help you lads today?” IV asks as he looks between all three of them. Smiling when he sees II “oh it you Lii!” IV expels like he was surprised. “Its II, i just say Lii for simplicity” II nods, knowing a lot of people find his name odd.

Ivy types out something on his ordering tablet, “i'm guessing the usual black eye” ivy smiles. II hums in confirmation, “and anything those two would like?” IV asks as he gestures to III and Vessel. “They are your partners, right? you mentioned a Vessel or Verna? And some one you called Red?” Ivy asks as he pulls out cups and starts to write down II’s name on it. 

“Black coffee, please” Vessel says with a slight shake to its voice before they just whisper to II what they want. “And a blueberry scone” II adds on, wanting to make sure vessel got all it wanted. “And what's your name sweetheart” IV ask’s vessel so he can write down the name on their cup. Vessel at first flusters at the pet name being used so smoothly. “Vess- no, put down Verna” Vessel says with a soft smile, which makes II squeeze its arm gently in congratulations. 

III smiles when IV turns to ask what they want, “what do you recommend..” III looks at IV’s name tag “..Ivy?” they finish with a smirk. IV just smiles “i fear I- it might be too sweet for you” he tries to flirt back.

II kicks III in the ankle “OW!”. this sight makes IV laugh and snort, which amazes all of them. “goodness. okay, too answer your question Red” IV say with a big grin “my favorites the cafe miel, coffee wise. but tea wise, i usually go with a london fog” IV responds as he plays with his pen “your pick though”.

III leans against the counter as they think, “I'll try the cafe miel” they say “as long as it's, as sweet as you” III purrs. “oh jesus christ” Vessel whispers “this is the same thing they did to me when we first met” Vessel tells II. 

IV just snorts and writes it down “what's your name?” he asks with a soft expression “unless you just want me to write down Red?”. III shakes their head “put down Thea, but you can call me III.. or whatever you want” III chuckles. “III you are horrible at being subtle” II groans and crosses his arms as Vessel rests its chin on his head. 

IV gets pulled away from the cashregister by evaline so she can discuss something with him. III just watches that and then giggles and turns to II and Vessel “i'm not trying to be subtle, i'm trying to get closer” III admits. 

II’s eyes widen “you just met him, Thea!” II yelps. “I feel like that's what you said to yourself when you met me, Lii” III counters, being a smart ass.

Vessel takes a deep breath “ok my loves, can we not get into a tift at the moment. Both of you need coffee, and some food” Vessel says as it takes their partners hands. Both III and II take a deep breath. 

“I'm going to finish ordering, you take III to look at the records. Try and find me something please” II mutters as he pulls away so he can finish the order with Elanor as vessel and III walk off to cool down.

After coffee and some food II and III hold hands as they feel normal now. “Sorry that i was rude” III apologizes. “I accept your apology. But you aren't wrong, there was a reason that Vessel was the one to start dating you first before I did. And it was because I felt it was too soon” II explains, even if this might be odd to discuss in the middle of a bakery. 

IV walks over after finishing up what he needed to with evaline. “Sorry I had to walk away, evidently someone wants an ambrosia salad style cake for their wedding.” IV laughs as he takes off his apron and pulls up his sleeves to expose his forearms. Which the three men gawk at, seeing the ivy tattoos wrap around his wrists and up.

“So can I get you three anything before you head out?” IV asks with a soft expression that makes his eyes look more blue then they were before. 

“Some ivycakes” III blurts out as their face reddens. “I've never heard of that, we do have angel food cake though!” IV responds obviously.

II clears his throat and chimes in, “we are good, we are just about to go purchase those records Thea picked out and then head off home.” II excuses. 

“Well, come back soon. it was great to finally meet your partners, they are very sweet” Ivy says as he makes eye contact with III. which II notices, and so does Vessel by the way it grabs II’s waist and squeezes gently.

After they pay for the records and walk out the bakery, Vessel finally speaks about its experience. “I like Ivy, he has pretty eyes. I wonder if he's single” Vessel smiles as all three of them walk together. 

“The ivycakes thing was about his ass… i asked for a slice of his ass” III explains. 

Both II and Vessel look over at III in surprise.

#BMBTE #sleep token #sleep token band #vessel #sleep token vessel #sleepy cryptid boys #the duck can write #sleep token fanfiction #sleep token headcanons #sleep token worship #sleep token ii #iii sleep token #iv sleep token #vessel sleep token #sleep token iii #ii #vessel ii #vessel iii #iv #vessel iv #sleep token iv #bakery au

[curiositysavesthecat]

additional comment from the submitter: ❝I'd also like to emphasize that this is trans men. This doesn't mean he/him lesbians or transmascs who don't identify fully as men.❞

*This poll was submitted to us and we simply posted it so people could vote and discuss their opinions on the matter. If you’d like for us to ask the internet a question for you, feel free to drop the poll of your choice in our inbox and we’ll post them anonymously (for more info, please check our pinned post).

#poll #polls #tumblr poll #tumblr polls #trans #trans man #trans men #lesbian #transgender #lgbt #queer #lgbtq #gay #lgbtq community #lgbt community #incognito polls

[lycanr0t]

if you'd like to share your thoughts on gay trans man marcille i'd love to read them and/or see your art of him! (no pressure of course!)

oh man will I share my thoughts dfjkh I was maybe going to eventually make a post to ramble about it but this gives me the perfect excuse to now :J

This ranting WILL have spoilers for anime only fans/ppl who haven't finished the manga!

Marcille is interesting to read as a gay trans man though. Because how I see it, during the events of the manga he would not know he's trans! Or at most, he would maybe have some Gender Feelings but he wouldn't really understand it yet.

To me, Marcille is the type who would at first do everything in his power to deny it/convince himself he isn't trans. I think he would have a fair bit of internalized transphobia just as a result of his fairly rigid way of going about things. He has specific standards for himself especially but also for others.

This is where my gay trans man headcanon for Falin comes in lol.

Not for romance reasons specifically, but because I think the way Marcille treats Falin when looked at through the lens of Marcille being a trans egg is especially interesting.

For my Falin headcanon, I see Falin as a gay trans man as well, but I think that he wouldn't be out to Marcille until after the events of the manga. This is very integral to how I view Marcille's gender discovery happening.

I think that during the time they're in school together, Marcille would have feelings for Falin that are confusing. In Marcille's mind they're both girls, so he must just be a girl into girls, right? Meanwhile Falin performs girl wrong and this challenges Marcille's worldview. Marcille cares for Falin, and this manifests as Marcille trying to 'help' Falin perform girl better. Basically, Marcille doubling down on his currently held beliefs of what gender is and how it functions instead of considering that it may not be that simple, and he and/or Falin may not be a girl. Falin I think would not bring up being trans for a few reasons but primarily that boy is just not big on conflict with people especially those he cares for.

But anyways. A perfect example of Marcille forcing his idea of correct gender performance being in a daydream hour page where Falin is drawn with short hair, and Marcille is visibly pretty upset by it. (I don't have the translated image but here it is)

I know that it seems like a small thing that doesn't hold much weight, and it's not technically canon but trans mens hair is often something that people feel that they need to control. A girl cutting her hair short is seen as this horrible, unacceptable thing. Now again, obviously Falin doesn't canonically cut his hair short, but the fact that Marcille would be upset and specifically wants it long again informs us about his view of these things. I think that hair being useful for magic would end up being a justification for both being upset by the concept of Falin with short hair, and a justification to himself on why he is not allowed to experiment with shorter hair. It's more practical for his line of work/study, so it's a perfect excuse to just never think about if he TRULY loves it long or if he is just doubling down on performing what's expected of him.

Marcille is a KING of appearing way more uptight than he is. He's very by the books, very strict seeming about doing magic right, but he also specifically primarily has interest in the most taboo magic. He's the loudest about complaining about eating monsters, but he's also the first one to outright say that if they have to eat demihumans then so be it. Marcille is full of contradicting feelings and actions and I think he's prone to trying to fit into what people expect but his heart isn't fully in it so he still ends up doing the unexpected as well.

Even after the manga, Marcille has lost his desire to take care of his hair but he honestly doesn't seem... that upset by it? He is upset, sure, but for something that appeared to be a pretty big thing for him he accepts it shockingly smoothly. Almost as if perhaps, it's a relief to have an excuse to try something different. To try shorter hair maybe? Because now he has an excuse other than doing gender 'wrong'. It would feel safer to explore.

Aand I have a TON of other thoughts but this is getting pretty long and I'm losing track of my thoughts SO I'm going to drop a small list of some other random half formed thoughts I think about in relation to Marcille being a gay trans man

marcille being half elf half tallman and the parallel between that and being trans and how when you're trans you're alienated and isolated. in society's eyes youre not fully a man, not fully a woman, you're both and neither and othered in a complicated way

everyone assuming marcilles wish is to become 'full elf' also is interesting to compare to the experience of people viewing being trans as 'wishing you were X gender' in a very binary way

marcille asking if his dad is pregnant in a flashback just feels like something a trans egg kid would say

marcilles overall attachment to his father tbh.

marcille being super into romance novels and specifically his succubus presenting as a pretty boy from his novels. Obviously this can be read romantic or whatever but I know personally a lot of characters I was obsessed with as a child that I thought was romantic attraction turned out to be a combination of attraction and wanting their gender expression. I think it's interesting to read into marcille's interest in romance novels as him finding a 'safe' way to explore his attraction to men and desire to be a man without actually acknowledging that directly. (a lot of irl gay trans men do similar before they realize theyre gay trans men!)

Aaand that's my thoughts for now lmao. Here's some pen doodles I did while figuring out how I wanted to draw post-canon marcille :> Still working on figuring him out but I like how these look! I like the idea of him having some facial hair (not very long as elves seem to not be able to grow much body hair) and probably cutting his hair so it's more shoulder length and a bit easier to manage!

#rot posts #ask #dunmeshi spoilers #dungeon meshi #dunmeshi #marcille donato #tagging mostly for organizing/being able to come back to this but also. look at my trans headcanons #rots art #long post

[mikaela-the-slut-expert]

yayyyy 💕 then can i ask for a scenario in which the reader, who’s a trans guy, volunteering to be the bride in the ghost groom scenario and threatening to stab anyone who says anything about him looking like a girl with platonic feng xin + mu qing and romantic hualian? (or just xie lian, since technically hua cheng is only there for like, .5 seconds lol)

(💥 anon)

Masculine Bride?

HuaLian x ftm(?)reader

IM SO SORRY 😔 I'VE HAD THE WORST FEW MONTHS OF MY LIFE BUT I LIVE I WILL BE COMPLETING REQUESTS AGAIN THANKS FOR NOT GIVING UP ON ME AGAIN GUYS ☺️🖤

____________________________________

☀️Feng Xin didn't want to be in this ridiculous mission at all. He has to deal with Mu Qing in disguise and he has to see Xie Lian who was once his best friend. So it feels a little awkward to him but he gets to see you too! So he's quite happy to see you and Xie Lian again

☀️When he finds out that the plan is to disguise as a bride he immediately says Nuh uh. No way he's doing that, Mu Qing would never live it down.

☀️But when you offer to disguise as the bride, since you do looke somewhat androgynous he's like great!

☀️He doesn't have to do it and he can protect you if you all get in harms way

☀️Honestly he's surprised you volunteered so quickly. Feng Xin knows you'd rather stay in your male form and he knows you don't like appearing feminine much these days. Gods do it all the time so Feng Xin doesn't mind. Have you seen Shi Qingxuan?

☀️So everything was going great, they got you dressed and the one village girl did your makeup so you didn't look like a clown. But then they ran into those annoying men again.

☀️ They were congratulating Xie Lian, Mu Qing, and Feng Xin for finding a pretty bride and even wanted to join up, but they all knew the men just wanted to eat off their success.

☀️So when you laughed and explained you did make a good bride even though you're a man, No one really laughed. The men had genuinely thought you were a woman sooo they try to call your bluff.

☀️You did in fact change forms to look more like a bride but it doesn't feel good to have every single feminine feature to be pointed out. You're used to it so you weren't going to say anything but the group of men freeze and their skin pales when you hear a crack behind you

☀️Feng Xin may or may not have broken a pillar. May or may not have damaged his own temple. . .

☀️it succeeds in shutting the men up because what man is able to just break a God's pillar?!

☀️Feng Xin has to admit he's pretty irritable, but hearing the group of men bully you just pisses him off. He knows he's supposed to be in disguise and not gain your attention but he can't stand by and watch you be passive about it.

☀️ When the men practically evacuate the area you only laugh softly and link arms with him saying, "I found my guard!" You already know it's Feng Xin🙄

🌕Mu Qing was also your best friend and you never really gave him the chance to distance himself from you like he distanced himself from Xie Lian.

🌕Mu Qing has been with you a long time and he knows you're more comfortable identifying as a man. He has no issue with it. It took some time getting used to but he doesn't care as long as you're happy.

🌕so hearing the group of men start pointing you out so blatantly ticks him off. He knows he can't harm mortals but he sure wishes he could.

🌕It's not against the rules to threaten them though, so when he threatened to cut off their hand because it's rude to point isn't against the rules either.

🌕You were surprised honestly, Mu Qing doesn't care about a lot of things and doesn't usually get violent unless it's with Feng Xin.

🌕but you laugh when the group of men run off and you lean on Mu Qing. Saying you're so happy to have your own personal protector

🪷Xie Lian doesn't really fight. It's not that he can't he just doesn't see a point to do so.

🪷but that doesn't mean he'll let people bully you either

🪷 You've stuck with him for awhile so you're used to just taking mean words in stride. Xie Lian has never let them get away with it though.

🪷So it comes as a Surprise to you all when Xie Lian uses rou'ye to tie the group of men up together and he "advised them to go away before something unfortunate happens"

🪷You smiles and kiss his cheek, linking arms with him with a smile.

🪷"You're cute when you're protective"

#tgcf #tgcf headcanon #tgcf xie lian #xie lian x reader #tgcf feng xin #tgcf mu qing #tgcf feng xin x reader #tgcf mu qing x reader #trans reader #ftm #mxtx tgcf

[butchmartyr]

sorry if i might be misinterpreting ur post but: so its Not just me that gets a little bothered by how suddenly hyped up strap/packing bulge is in lesbian spaces then??? like i swear i used to have to be hyper vigilant about if my dick was visible or not & had an irrational fear of being labelled a sex pest if i ever had like morning wood during a sleepover or something & now suddenly so many tme's are out openly thirsting over plastic dick prints??? like i Guess i'd prefer other dykes openly like a bulge than act the way my paranoia insists they would; but it all just feels a bit eyeroll inducing & irritates me a bit... idk...

as someone who’s had a cis ex eagerly refer to mine as a ‘bio strap’, i do get you (especially with the hypervigilance, mood), but my frustration was less with ppl being centered on ‘strap’ as uniquely lesbian compared to other phalluses and more with the growing comfortability non-transfems build for only addressing and recognizing trans women by their dicks while not working on their other internalized transmisogyny.

like i myself am someone who generally isn’t that bottom dysphoric but what that’s gotten me is great experiences from my love life such as getting chided for perceived male socialization before being made to top by a lesbian ex again (because why would someone like me want or have different sex), or the general fact that it wasn’t until like, last year that i got to experience some explicit compliments and touches for the first time on my breasts and my body that weren’t just about my dick or otherwise typically ‘masculine’ things like my muscles (especially silly given that im just skinny and barely have any musculature). and my partners were all lgbt, several of them trans in various ways! but this didn’t stop them from taking my general comfort with my body as an excuse to hone in on my dick without fear of repercussion.

i feel like a lot of people act like being gay or trans inherently makes you deconstruct/be better about gender, and they might be better about people similar to them, but often they still wind up treating trans women like ‘different’ men and carry matching expectations as such. sometimes it’s more subtle or sometimes it’s obvious like when lesbians will sometimes use us to experiment with bisexuality, but it still happens and people hate to talk about it lol. and we don’t have to get into the frustration i feel for people being like that re: strap ons while still being weird about other kinds of dicks, as if plenty of nb people and transmascs don’t see their strap ons as extensions of themselves and as their dicks through this way, but i do feel it, lol.

#the strap on thing is annoying though lol. lads are we successfully normalize diverse bodies and removing moral judgement from body parts b #refusing to call dicks dicks and acting like plastic ones are less ‘real’ and better by being so #long post #asks

[outeremissary]

I was really sleepy when I was answering asks yesterday and I almost forgot to check if you were doing the problematic oc ask too!

Balth is your oc I’m most familiar with! But if they’ve already been asked tell me about whatever critter is infecting your brain most rn 👀💖

Ahh, I appreciate the ask!! Somehow, no one did ask about him!! At any rate, I feel like this blog is full of Balthazar's sympathetic moments and not his Chaotic Fucking Evil Moments, happy to finally correct that <3

Lies constantly

Vengeful

Selfish

Past history of gold digging

Former con artist

Endorsement of experiments on animals

Enjoys watching other people suffer

Loves making people worse

Willing to sell out friends when they cease to be useful

Told a suicidal man to do a flip on the way down

Made fun of a suicidal man's family's deaths

Invades woman's memories to see her at her most vulnerable, mocks her for it

In general just willing to kick anyone when they're down

Doesn't like Regongar's puns

Profited from infant sacrifice

Murdered his own cult

Lied about having a cult

Problematic trans rep?

Accepted demonic gifts multiple times

Supported two different Lamashtu cults

Really does unconditionally forgive Tristian

Sincerely thinks Tristian did nothing wrong

(except cause problems for him but see two points above)

Funded demonic library

Misappropriation of public funds for personal projects

Harboring smugglers

Has been called the worst and most evil person in the Stolen Lands multiple times

Had a cult dedicated to him being The Worst (until he murdered them, see above)

Recruits enemies terrorizing area to work for him

Leading on poor Sharel

Frequently manipulates others into killing on his behalf

Takes credit for the work of others

Refuses to help with camp chores

Troll alliance

Hates animals

Obnoxious PDA

Abuses aasimar heritage to take advantage of others' trust

The public executions

The secret executions

Comes from working class family, often uses his success to close opportunities for others instead of opening them

Jaethal minister

Belittles Regongar's mental health problems

Ghosts Regongar instead of breaking up with him

Mocks Linzi's writing constantly

Enchantment specialist. Mind control is the way <3

Endorsement of experiments on nonconsenting wererats

Identity theft

Identity theft coverup

Asshole southern elitist, frequently belittles local culture as backwards

Propaganda

Lying to the public about a plague

Gaslighting rioters into fighting each other

24 year old bullying a 17 year old... Lander Lebeda is literally a minor

Plus that's just high key pathetic

The murders

The assassinations

Doesn't like dessert :(

Funding foreign dissidents

Endorsement of troll torture

Bad at communicating emotional needs

Using other people as shields in combat

Will throw anyone under the bus for anything

Really only heals Tristian in combat

Supports filicide for dark ritual purposes

His friendship with Jaethal in general

Problematic bi rep?

Attempted to recreate Bloom

Everything that happened during the Divorce Era

There's probably still a warrant out for him in Absalom

Due to [redacted]

Defacing a priceless historic tome (only known copy)

Anyone can die if it's for Tristian's sake

Sells out allies when they stop being convenient

Surtova supporter

Covering up Lander's death

Lander Undeath Incident

Torture is fine

I'm not even sure he seriously thinks torture works he's just horrible

Bread and circuses babyyyyyy

Mean to Nok-Nok

Literally kicked a dog

And there's an incomplete list of Balthazar Crimes! I'm sure I'm missing so, so much but honestly he's problematic more than he's not so. You know.

[prompt]

#because of timing I actually thought for some reason you sent the Kas anon asdfjoiasd #ask game #ask me emithing #balthazar lucienne #bearvanhelsing #cw suicide mention #god. the balthazar crimes requiring me to add that. #the kas crime list is so long but the balthazar crime list is Longer.

[catenby-perineum]

Please note

I rolled out of bed to type this because it was weighing on me a bit.

I feel the need to explain this in depth but I really shouldn't have to so I'll toss a tl;dr at the end, I just feel like where I'm coming from is useful or something? I'm not sure.

I just wanted to say that over the time I've run this blog there have been some compliments I felt uneasy about. At the time I often accepted them; Even viewed them as positive things even if something felt off. But dwelling on why they felt off gave me plenty of reason to make this post.

I hold no negative feelings towards the people who offered these compliments because in each case it's been very obvious where they were coming from. Perhaps I'm too nice, but I don't feel negativity about it.

But some people seem to misunderstand what "any pronouns" means or how it interacts with their views of who they are speaking toward.

I have had tags slapped on my pics that amount to things like "#hnnnnnng I love girls/women" as they have misconstrued my acceptance of any pronouns to mean I accept others gendering me for themselves.

I do not.

I have had many people compliment and sext over my "girlcock" or "girlmusk".

I do not have these things.

I am nonbinary, I am agender, I have some fluidity in there but it's constantly bouncing between miasmas of gender rather than along the traditional binary, I am trans and happy about that- it hasn't been a fact I understood for long but I've enjoyed understanding myself more as a person than as a singular gender.

I have a cock, not a girlcock, to put it bluntly.

To put it more clearly, I feel "at home" in so many different terms- so many different titles and pronouns- because I feel myself within them. If someone calls me mistress or miss or sir or whatever I feel myself in that because all of gender feels like a part of my blurry agender identity. Effectively they are calling me by parts of my home or something poetic- I rolled out of bed for this.

But when someone points at me and declares me one thing, calling me a woman in an apparent attempt to show appreciation towards the varied body types that exist within the gender- to show respect towards trans women by what? Misgendering a nonbinary person? It feels like someone found me hot and wanted to label me so they could maintain their preferred sexual identity or something but that's an assumption and not my internal world to explore.

Gendering my body parts as if my acceptance of pronouns extends towards deciding how to label my body for me is the real kicker that has dug at me over time.

At first I took girlcock to be a rather sizeable compliment as it felt divergent from my past identity. People were taking an effort to not see me as simply a man, so that must mean we're going the right direction- I thought.

But as time has sat on it it's just remained uncomfortable and I've long since figured out why.

Pointing at me, a nonbinary agender trans person, and saying "Girl-bodypart" is still incorrect. It's still deciding for me and frankly it feels really weird being in such happy trans circles but still occasionally hearing that I'm a hot transfemme with a hot girlcock when that's not what I am. You can clearly see that's not what I am- it's in my damn name if you needed a reminder.

*sigh* I'm not even actually mad about it, I'm mildly upset I guess, but more in a disappointed and kind of saddened way.

In practice it's just made these "compliments" feel like someone saying you're the coolest ever- at the exact moment you step in a puddle in bare socks. You sure as hell don't feel cool right now and this just feels fucking off and will continue to for a while now, thanks.

TL;DR I am nonbinary and agender and trans and accept any pronouns, this does not mean you can decide I am a woman for the sake of praising me as a hot woman, this also does not mean you can gender my body for the same purpose- I will softly remind you that I do not accept others complimenting my "girlcock" as I do not have one. Thank you.

I guess in conclusion, girlcock fucking rules, trans people fucking rule, I am nonbinary and not a girl and do not have a girlcock, mine's just a cock, I'm going back to bed and love you all 💜

#ag-t

[toc-the-elder]

I've spent a lot of time being a bit confused by posts by trans people talking about being worried they're faking it and not really trans.

And yeah. I get you now.

I was doing some casual research to find out when the earliest date I could apply for a Gender Recognition Certificate is (depending on what level of evidence they ask for), and for some reason, I had the thought of "Oh god, you mean I can't change it back?"

I don't know where this thought came from. When I interrogate my own thought process, and ask at what point I would like to detransition, I don't have an answer for myself. There is no point where I think existing as I was would ever make me happier than living as the woman I can be. I suppose the finality of the certificate is what scares me a little, but isn't that the point? Isn't the whole point to try and close up all the legal loopholes someone might use to treat me as anything but female? And why should the finality of the thing scare me? My whole transition has been a series of finalities. I have already endured and bloomed under final, permanent changes to my body. I have already declared myself to the world. I know in my heart of hearts that I desperately want and need my surgery. It's been perhaps my deepest personal desire my entire life. I have been fucking diagnosed with the trans disease.

I shouldn't be shocked at the finality of any of this. And the fact that I am gave me a bit of a wobble. Like what if I'm not really trans? What if all these years have been just some silly mistake or not really me or self-delusion or just talking myself into something and what if I go through with all of this just to regret it?

Well, the alternative is going back to how I was, and I know I already regret that. I know I'm wrong when I suggest to myself that I'm not really trans. Because as much as I hate the way the NHS medicalises transness, they are treating me for gender dysphoria, and I grow more comfortable with what I see in the mirror every day. They boil transness down to gender dysphoria, and I certainly experience that, and embracing my womanhood makes me experience it a lot less. I know that non-trans people probably don't regularly and invariably picture having their intimate experiences with a different genre of genitalia.

Sometimes I have a moment of doubt, but by every metric I can think of, I am trans, and thus a woman.

#and honestly making myself a woman by accident doesnt seem so bad #trans #transgender #hrt #cw gender dysphoria #lgbt #lgbtq #lgbtqia

[transmascissues]

it's silly but the biggest reason why im not into t yet is bc im so afraid of losing my hair. do you have any solutions/tips for it?

first of all, i don’t think it’s silly — it’s natural to be worried when hair loss is talked about by so many people as like…one of the worst results of aging for men. listening to my dad talk about how much he hates balding definitely did not make me feel particularly good about the knowledge that i may very well be joining him someday. i’m not saying the fear is right, because i don’t think hair loss is something awful that we should avoid at all costs, but it’s an understandable fear given the beauty standards we’re working with, and it’s one that a lot of us (myself included) feel.

one thing that’s helped me is just…paying more attention to the guys that i interact with on a daily basis. i’ve learned two things from it: 1) hair loss is super fucking common. i’d say it’s much harder to find an adult man who isn’t balding at all than it is to find one who’s completely bald. and 2) if you forget everything you’ve been told about how bad hair loss is, you’ll realize that quite frankly, every single one of those guys looks totally fucking fine. it doesn’t ruin their appearance and make them ugly, it looks totally natural and isn’t really even something you’d notice if you weren’t looking for it. we put so much weight on it but it’s really just not that big of a deal. i’ll hear my parents talk shit about men in my family who are losing their hair when i didn’t even notice a difference last time i saw them. it’s one of those things (like so many other appearance-related things) that you really only notice at all because you’ve been taught that you’re supposed to care about it.

this isn’t something i’ve done personally, but if you really want to desensitize yourself to the idea of it, embrace the time-honored queer tradition of just shaving your whole damn head! find out what you’d look like without hair, find out how you feel about it and what you can do that makes you feel good about your appearance without hair, test the waters while it’s still a temporary change and not something permanent. that way, it won’t feel like this big scary unknown, and you’ll actually have a frame of reference for your feelings about how you look without hair rather than accepting the societal assumption that you’ll inevitably hate it. if you don’t want to actually shave your head, you could also just fuck around with bald filters or photoshop and see what happens.

oh, and if you’re attracted to men, keep an eye out for guys who are bald or balding and also hot as fuck. in my experience, there’s no insecurity or potential future insecurity that being gay for other men hasn’t helped me with. just off the top of my head, i can think of a couple actors who i think are absolutely fucking gorgeous who have helped me get over my fears about losing my hair. despite what our anti-aging-obsessed world might want you to think, there is no such thing as a physical feature that automatically makes someone less attractive, and while making attractiveness less of a priority in your life is good, it can’t hurt to also give yourself some proof that actually, you might lose your hair and look hot as hell doing it.

basically, entertain the possibility that it won’t be a bad thing at all! whether that’s just because it turns out to be a neutral thing for you or because you end up actually liking it, it’s not an inherently bad thing. i’ve ended up liking a lot of things that were “supposed to” be bad effects of t — i love the weight i’ve gained and the new shape it gives my body, i get a lot of gender euphoria from the fact that my acne is now on parts of my face that i saw a lot of guys in high school get it and i’m not complaining about the scars i get from it either because i’ve always liked the added texture that acne scars give my skin, and so on. i think there’s a lot of joy to be had in the changes we’re taught to fear, once we look past that conditioning and actually explore how we feel about it.

but if it’s something you really don’t want and you just want to improve your chances of not having to deal with it, it’s not like there’s nothing you can do! products like finasteride (oral) and minoxidil (usually topical but i think there might also be oral versions) are pretty commonly used among trans guys, for the purpose of avoiding hair loss and for other reasons, and there are plenty of other anti-hair loss products out there (though i don’t know how effective any one of them might be). if it’s a big enough deal for you, you can just decide that you’ll go off of t if/when you start noticing signs of it, since no longer having higher t levels would stop the process in its tracks. and if you don’t find prevention options that work for you so it ends up happening, you can always explore different hair styles (judging by the pattern of hair loss i see in my family, i suspect that keeping my hair long would make it less obvious if i started losing mine), find your preferred method of covering it when you don’t feel good about it (personally i love a good beanie generally and would probably wear them a lot more if i didn’t have hair to worry about because my main complaint is the way they press my hair onto my neck), or just shave it all off if you don’t like the look of the partial balding but don’t mind a shaved head. the point being — you have options!

at the end of the day, whether you go on t or not, you’re going to see your body change as you age in ways that aren’t always going to be attractive to others or aesthetically pleasing to you. that’s just the reality of having a body. even if you never went on t, you’d get older and you might see your hair thin out even if you don’t bald, you’ll see your skin start to wrinkle and sag in places that used to be smooth, your metabolism might slow or your body fat might start to gather in new places; hell, you might lose your hair for a totally different reason and end up in the same place but without the benefits of having been on t that whole time. life is full of bodily changes like that. transphobes will fearmonger about the permanent changes of testosterone all day long but the truth is, there is no escaping permanent bodily changes. whether or not you go on t, your body now isn’t the same as it will be in 1 or 5 or 10 or 20 or 50 years, just like it isn’t the same as it was at any point in your life before now. our bodies are never supposed to stop growing and aging and changing throughout our lives. there’s no guaranteeing that we’ll love every single change our bodies go through, but that’s okay! there are so many things in life that are more important than the way our bodies look. even if you go on t and lose your hair and don’t like how it looks, your life won’t be ruined; plenty of other things will bring you joy and more than make up for the insecurities.

just think about the gender euphoria and relief from dysphoria that t could give you. would losing your hair be bad enough to outweigh all of that? or is it just the pressure of a society that decided balding is bad that’s making you fear one single change despite how much joy you could have if you let that fear go? only you can decide if going on t is worth the potential downsides for you, but i suspect that for most of us, the benefits of going on t far outweigh the possibility of side effects like hair loss happening down the line.

#when i say i love helping people beat their fears about t this is what i mean. i will simply write a whole essay about it #some people might think it’s silly to answer a question like this so extensively #but i don’t think it is! i feel like this is a really common fear but also one i don’t see talked about much #maybe because it’s so common among cis guys that people don’t see it as a question to ask in trans spaces? idk #but i think we should talk about it more. especially when transphobes use it as a way to talk shit about t #ask answered #testosterone #hrt #ftm hrt #hair loss #trans men #transmascs