I’m too young to be a wine aunt :/
My favorite cousin Bri is 25 today! My cousin Bri and I have had this ongoing joke since we were legit 13-14. We’ve been best friends practically our whole lives. I wanted us to be exactly alike when I was a kid and I didn’t like that she was older than me so we would tell everyone that we had the same birthday. Everyone was in on it. Her mom would get me stuff and we would legit celebrate our birthdays together for years. On her birthday, it was also mine; and on my birthday, it was also hers. Every year. However, due to the coronavirus, she can’t go anywhere or do anything today. She made a post on Facebook complaining about how she’s stuck in the house on her 25th birthday and I want no parts of the Corona on my big 25 so when I wished her happy birthday, I told her that she could have her birthday back after a decade of sharing our special days together and I’ll take my original day back. She said, “Nah WE GOT THE SAME BIRTHDAY REMEMBER?!” Then she wished me a happy birthday. So I guess it’s still my first birthday of the year and I’m stuck in the house. I’m pre-25 today lmao. Man, I miss the fuck out of my cousin. I’M SCREAMIN HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY FOREVER ROLL DAWG TODAY. I LOVE YOU CUZ. ALWAYS AND 5EVER. WE GONE TURN UP ON AUGUST 2ND DON’T WORRY CUZ. BY OUR SECOND BIRTHDAY THIS WILL ALL BE OVER 😂😂
ITS MY BIRTHDAYYY
I have tried to kill myself
It was last january, I think
I was home alone and didn’t feel like doing anything
So I just thought ‘maybe I should go outside and lay in the snow because why not’
So I went on our backyard, listening to music and laid in the snow
I wished I would fall asleep or faint
I laid there, I think, for almost an hour
Then I went inside
I have been thinking about this tonight and just had to let it out. I am too scared to talk about this to anyone
Siento que no puedo respirar bien, todo a mi alrededor se mueve lento, no tengo ganas de levantarme de la cama. Él me mira y me pregunta ¿Que tienes?, yo simplemente dejo escapar una leve sonrisa y le respondo que todo está bien, pero no es así, nada esta bien, tengo este sentimiento dentro de mí de querer salir corriendo y no mirar atrás.
Y sí, tengo ganas de que me deseen, de que me sufran y de que no puedan evitar mirar mis ojos, o mi cabello cuando sopla el viento. Quiero ser luz. Quiero ser amada, y poder amar.
Pero la vida es injusta, y esas cosas no pasan.
Wednesday, March 25
I watched Love, Simon today. Mostly because I heard that Panic! At the Disco was sorta referenced in it. I liked it, it was a good movie. But some parts of it I had to remind myself that it wasn’t real to ignore the cringe.
Dad is being really annoying. He’s been forcing us to play board games with him, probably because none of was would want to hang out with him anyway.
He always makes stupid rules just because he can and because he’s in control. I wish he would just met us live and trust that we can be mature without him putting safety cones everywhere.
First day of online schooling went great. I keep turning in assignments late though. I’ll probably just say my internet broke or somthing.
I’m working on a youtube video right now.
Cheguei a um ponto que nem me importava com o “amor próprio “, amar você sempre fazia com que eu me amasse cada vez mais.
lágrimas e papel
You can be broken with healthy heart aspirations.