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cheeseceli · 3 months

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When your parents don't like them

Pairing: Ot8!skz × Gn!Reader (individually)

Genre: reverse hurt/comfort? Angst? A little bit of fluff perhaps; reaction

Description: their reaction to not having the approval of your parents in their first meeting (established relationship)

Warnings: not proofread; a lot of overthinking and self doubt in most of the scenarios; the length of each story is not favouritsm!! It's just that some scenarios required more details than others

A/n: I should have posted this one a long time ago... Oh well. And I am literally the mix of Han and Lee Know, this would 100% happen to me if I were in their shoes

Bang Chan

‌HE'S SO SHOCKED

‌Parents always love him, so why didn't yours?

‌He believes he took it for granted

‌But he was so sure your family would love him

‌Rethinks everything he said and did

‌And thinks about what he could've done

‌He'll be up all night because of it, you better believe me

"Maybe it's the outfit I was wearing?"

"Chan, for God's sake, go to sleep."

"Seriously though, do you think my clothes weren't appropriate?"

"There was nothing wrong with how you looked baby."

"... So maybe I didn't introduce myself properly?"

"Chan."

Lee Know

‌ He knew he had to talk

‌ But it turns out he was too scared

‌And your parents just aggravated his problem

‌ He'd give only short answers and would only speak when spoken with

‌ Because of that your parents didn't see him as a really charismatic guy

‌ But I swear he was trying his best

"I swear it wasn't as bad as it seemed."

"It was horrible. I doubt any of your parents even know what my voice sounds like."

"You were nervous. I'm sure they'll understand. If you'd like I can talk to them about it."

"Please, don't. The last thing I want is for your parents to think that besides being awkward I'm a coward as well."

"They don't think either of those things. You'll see, you guys just need to know each other a little bit more. They'll love you."

Even with his worried expression, he gave you a small smile "I hope so".

Changbin

‌ You warned him he was getting too close

‌ He was holding your hand, caressing your thigh, hugging you too tight, kissing you a lot...

‌ All the time

‌ And yes, you both were dating for a while now

‌ But your parents didn't really appreciate the attitude

‌ And truly, he thought that by doing that he was showing how much he treasured and loved you

‌ Sadly your parents didn't understand his actions like he planned

"But what was I supposed to do? Stay away from you?"

"Ideally, yes"

Changbin pouted, not even realising it "but I'm your boyfriend"

"They are not used to this fact just yet. Don't worry though, they still have a lot of time to like you. Just wait and see"

Hyunjin

‌ Similar to Chan, Hyunjin didn't expect to be rejected by your parents

‌of course, he wasn't expecting to make the fall in love immediately, but he knew he had some charms

‌and he actually put a lot of effort into impressing them so when it doesn't work he's like

‌genuinely sad

‌And he's scared your relationship might change now that he doesn't have your family approval right away.

"So... About the dinner"

"They are always like this, don't worry"

"How come?"

"I knew they were gonna play hard to get. But don't you stress over it, sooner or later they will realise there is no need to act like it"

"So I can still convince them into not hating me?"

"Why would they hate you? You were really boyfriend material if you ask me"

He laughed, a little bit more relieved "They were kinda... aggressive back there, y'know?"

"Ugh, sorry about that. I swear things will get better"

"You're not mad?"

"Of course not. Why would I be?"

"I thought you'd get sad or something like that since the meeting didn't go that well"

"I'm a bit sad, yeah. But it's not your fault. You did your best. Besides, it won't last that long. It's kinda hard to hate on the Hwang Hyunjin for too long"

He laughed again, openly this time as he replied "I hope you are right"

Han

‌The problem wasn't exactly what he did

‌The problem was that he didn't do anything

‌Literally anything

‌ He'd excuse himself to go to the bathroom to avoid any questions

‌He barely moved besides that

‌After a while your dad even forgot he was there

‌And Han wished he could disappear

"I'm so, so sorry"

"Ji, it's okay"

"I was gonna answer your mother, I swear. But she was looking at me with daggers in her eyes"

"You were just fine"

"Fine? Y/n, your dad sighed in relief after I left the room. They must see me as a loser"

"I'm sure they don't. Besides, you still have a lot of time left to win them over. I know they'll love you"

Felix

‌Your parents loved him actually

‌They just don't think he is fit to be your boyfriend

‌They think that his angel face and sweet personality wouldn't give you enough security throughout your life

‌And Felix wants to prove himself to your parents so badly now

‌He will use his deep voice privilege to try to prove his point

‌He will go to the gym with Changbin until he's "intimidating" enough

‌And he won't fail on reminding them how he has over 60 medals on taekwondo

"How do I look?"

"Great, as always"

"But do I look intimidating? Scary?"

"Lix..."

"But not too scary. I need to look threatening to others but reliable to you"

"You look like someone my parents will like"

"They already like me, but not enough to like our relationship"

"They will though. Soon enough they will appreciate everything that comes along with you, trust me."

Felix smiled and nodded, feeling a certain comfort into your words as you headed to the door

"Just for the record, you do look threatening but reliable"

"Oh thank you. I was going crazy over this"

Seungmin

‌If your parents don't like Seungmin then the problem is on them

‌just kidding

‌Seriously though, I can't imagine why they wouldn't like him

‌And neither can Seungmin himself

‌So he truly thinks that everything was a misunderstanding and that it's only a matter of time until your whole family falls in love with him

‌He will face it like a challenge

"What about we invite your parents to our apartment this weekend?"

"We just saw them less than an hour ago"

"I think we should see them again"

"Did you like them that much?"

"They seem cool. But they also seem to hate me. I need to change their minds"

"What? They didn't hate you at all"

"Your father's glare would disagree. But that doesn't matter that much because by the end of this week they will love me"

"You seem certain"

"Of course I am. I can't have them hating me for the rest of our lives, can I?"

"They don't hate you. They are just... hard to please"

"I'll change this" he faced you with a confident smile "I give you my word"

I.N

‌Kinda clueless

‌Totally clueless actually

‌He can't understand what he did wrong but apparently he did something awful considering your parents disliked him that much

‌Will try to find ways to apologise

‌Will gift them and try to keep a conversation even when you're not around

"Does your mother like flowers? She does, right? Every mother does"

"What are you doing?"

"You said that she invited us to lunch this Friday. I don't want to go see her with empty hands again. Maybe that's what made her hate me so much the first time"

"She doesn't care about those things, Innie"

"No? Then why doesn't she like me?"

"She's just hard to satisfy, you know. But I bet she'll like you in no time. She just needs to get to know you better"

"You keep saying that but I don't know, I feel like that won't happen any time soon. I really want her to approve me"

He had that hopeless expression again, that one that really wanted to change the situation but didn't know how to. You really hated seeing him disappointed on himself.

"Lilies" you said

"What?"

"Those are my mother's favourites. Lilies"

"Oh my God, thank you" he got up and kissed the top of your head lightly, before going to the door of your shared apartment "I'll be right back"

Dividers by @saradika-graphics

Reblogs and feedback are always appreciated! | masterlist

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loveyourownsmiilee · 1 year

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Talking Buddie Language: Ep 6.13

Buddie nation how are we doing?!?! This episode really blew me and my expectations away. I loved it so much and I really think this was such a statement episode. They made a bold statement with their choices in both Buck and Eddie’s development and storylines going further, especially with Christopher. It was a fun and light episode to combat the previous few that have been on the darker side. I think this is my favorite episode to analyze thus far! So I’m just gonna get right into it.

Buck Can Do Math?

Before getting into the whole math aspect, I just want to say how good it was to see Buck and Eddie back to being partners and in sync once again. They walked in together. They moved so seamlessly at the same time, and it felt like no time has passed since the last time they worked together before Buck’s injury

I love how one of the running jokes throughout the show has been that Buck cannot do math. Eddie told him point blank back in 3.04 “You don’t know math.” So to actually see him do math so seamlessly in his head really made me happy to see!

B: How much did she drink?…So that’s a 100 mg. A woman her size should be having 14 mg. So she’s taken 7.13 more times than the daily allowance.

C: Did he just do math? In his head?

E: I think so.

B: Uh, was uh, was I right?

H: You are.

I love seeing his teams' reactions to him doing quick math in his head because everyone is confused about his new capabilities, including himself. One thing I would like to note is Eddie’s little confused moment because he knows Buck the best out of everyone there. So even he’s confused as to this new revelation that he didn’t know existed.

Chimney with Denny // Buck with Christopher

The reason I am including this specific part is because there was a deliberate choice to include a scene in which we have Chimney talking to his best friend's child about their fathers. It's interesting to see how Chim is literally just like any other uncle figure talking to someone he can consider to be a nephew of some sort. It was not paternal in any way because they had a talk about how complicated Chim's relationship was with his father. Denny connected to what Chim had to say but the difference in their interaction versus every interaction we have gotten with Buck and Christopher is massive. And it was conveniently just before we got that wholesome Buckley Diaz family scene too to really bring forth the differences between their relationships.

Buckley Diaz Family Does Math Together

I am still screaming and crying happy tears over this wholesome family moment. This season, the writers are really putting in the effort to solidify the three of them as a family unit of their own. They are sitting once again in Buck's kitchen doing the most mundane family task, which is snacking and helping their kid with their homework while they chat. It is such a difference to how Chim and Denny's interaction went a few moments before this scene.

I love Christopher testing out Buck's new skills while Buck happily indulges him. He seems so happy to inform his father that his Buck now knows everything, to which Buck quickly assures that it's not everything, just math. Eddie's fond little "yeah, yeah" is so typical in other shows and movies where one parent is getting all the cool points from their child and the other has to make peace with it. No heat there, just Eddie being his usual self when he's around his boys.

I love how while Buck and Chris were having their little fun, Eddie pulled a Buck and was the one researching Buck's new abilities. A lot of time, when two people are together for a while, whether it is romantically or platonically, they start adapting the other's little habits and tells. In this instance, Eddie had adopted Buck's knack for researching and he is relaying his findings to his boys in typical Buck fashion.

The conversation about math is something I really found interesting and I have rewatched it multiple times already to uncover that there may be an underlying meaning here that isn't just about math. When Buck tells Eddie that it turns out that he "loves math," Eddie goes on to relay his findings on lightning survivors and newfound cognitive abilities they had.

E: According to this, you can get new cognitive abilities after a serious injury to the central nervous system.

B: Which I uh, definitely had.

E: Hmm, but some doctors are saying it's not a real thing.

B: Uh, you think I've secretly known the square root of 162 all these years and just been holding out? No c'mon, it has to be the lightning.

E: Fair point.

This conversation really reminds me of the one Eddie and Ana had in 3.12 about the horses.

A: There's a lot to be said for getting back on the horse but there's also some value in learning that you don't like horses.

Now just follow me for a second. If you fall off a horse and decide to get back on it to give it another shot, that can be ok. But if you decide that maybe horses aren't your thing, then it's also ok to just never get on one again. In this instance, if Eddie dated women and it didnt go anywhere, it's ok for him to try again. But it is also alright if he decided that dating women isn't what he wants and moves on to dating people he does want.

The same goes for the math of it all. Buck states that he likes math now, but he didn't used to like math before. And when Eddie calls him out, he is quick to explain that he didn't know math until after the lightning hit him. So let's say that Buck has only dated women his entire life. Maybe he is now realizing that he can be into other's that he had never considered before. Maybe this is his way of realizing that he has other options in front of him that he didnt think he did before. It makes sense if you also consider Buck trying to reach out to each woman he's ever been with to see if his performance was alright later on in the episode. Because maybe now he doesn't want to focus on women, maybe he wants to focus on a man instead.

Before diving into more of their body language, I want to talk about a concept we learned in one of my behavioral analysis classes. Mirroring is typically when two partners have such a chemical connection that they’re so in sync with everything that they do. Such things can be finishing each others sentences, or knowing what the other is thinking, even walking, talking and behaving in very similar ways. Mirroring is usually found to be the case with people who are in long term romantic partnerships because it takes a lot of emotional understanding to achieve it. This is important because mirroring happens a lot with Buck and Eddie even though they’re not in a romantic relationship. It’s the fact that they are so deeply connected on an emotional level that allows them to mirror each other in different ways.

One form of mirroring is body chemistry as well. Take into consideration Eddie's body position throughout the entire family scene. Our bodies tend to immediately shift towards the direction of our other halves because they’re like magnets seeking each other out. When you are attracted to someone, your body senses it and craves to be close to it at all times. That's why when you love someone, your body is always turned towards them. It's not even something people are conscious about because our bodies tend to have a mind of their own at times, especially when it comes to chemistry. It’s something that is very prevalent in Buck and Eddie’s relationship because they always seem to turn towards the other at all times.

Eddie's entire body is turned towards Buck to the point where he kind of has his back towards his son. It’s also very open because he feels safe with Buck. He isn’t closed off or protecting himself. No, he’s just basically openly surrendering his body to Buck because he knows he will keep it safe at all times. Compare this moment to the one in Eddie’s own kitchen when he was breaking up with Ana. He had his arms folded in front of him, closing himself off to her. Such a massive difference between the two of them and the two of these idiots.

When Buck mentions liking the idea that he’s the guy who has the answers, he immediately looks at Eddie and then Christopher as if they’re the answers he’s been searching for all season long. Which if you think about it, they are the two people that make him the happiest and the most at ease. It’s ironic that Eddie is turned away from Buck when he says that so he completely misses the lovesick look on Buck’s face as he says it. Now this, in my opinion, directly foreshadows Buck realizing his feelings for Eddie soon. Just how he was venting to Eddie and Christopher in 6.01 about how the perfect options for interim captain were right under Bobby’s nose, well the perfect partner and kid are in front of Buck’s now. This moment indicates that Buck will come to find soon that the partner for him has been the one by his side for years now. That framing and the way his eyes are sparking tell it all.

Husband's Who Con Together, Stay Together

I am so so here for Buck and Eddie putting Buck's newly found abilities to the test and gaining something out of it. I thought it was hilarious how Eddie was the mastermind behind Buck conning their teammates out of their money by doing some math equations. This shows once again how close these two really are because they're counting their money together and in the end it is just that, their money. Because they're a team and whatever they win, they share. You can tell by the way Eddie takes the bills out of Buck's hands, counts it then hands them back to him. It's nice to see them attached at the hip once again considering how most of 6a they were often paired off with others.

We see another example of a mirroring when they are walking side-by-side with the same steps. Seeing them walking together and laughing together is so nice and it really shows us how when compared to their interactions with their other team members it is so different to what they have together. We watched Buck and Hen be close for most of 6a, they got drunk together and went out with Denny together. But when you compare their scenes and their friendship to the one Buck has with Eddie and Christopher, it is once again vastly different. Which is why it was so pertinent to have them establish those other bonds with the other members of the 118, so that when we saw them close again, we would be seeing how different their relationship is than with others'.

The Winner Takes All The Steaks

The Poker Scene™️ will forever go down in Buddie history as one of their most iconic moments ever. There is so much that happened in the span of a few minutes that I truly feel like I hallucinated this entire episode because of it.

I don’t know how Eddie convinced Buck that he should dress to impress, but he surely succeeded. They were both dressed the nicest we have ever seen them. I love how when it comes to these two, there’s such an unconditional trust formed between them that they don’t have to question each other. Buck simply put on his best suit, his nicest watch and went along simply because Eddie asked him to.

The fact that they were wearing red and blue makes me absolutely feral!! I’ve talked about the significance of the red and blue theory when it comes to couples so I’m just going to link it right here if anyone is interested. But the costume department surely made a choice putting these two in red and blue when they were on their own outside of work, doing something fun. Especially in an episode where all the other couples were off on their own doing coupley stuff together.

The LAFD poker game was so fun to watch especially knowing what Buck is coming back from. I love the idea that Eddie would have made these plans to bring Buck to this poker game to not only test out his new cognitive abilities, but so that he can have some fun. Eddie, more than anyone else, knows how Buck really feels about his recent brush with death. So him bringing Buck to this game, dressed to the nines can either be because he wanted to test out Buck's abilities or simply because he wanted Buck to enjoy himself. Either way, I love how much Eddie cares about Buck and his happiness and well-being.

I want to discuss a couple different moments and how they are with each other. When they first enter and Buck sees Captain Mehta and Chief Williams, he is clearly shocked because whatever he was anticipating was definitely not a poker game with other LAFD members. When Chief says, "Let's see if he survives tonight," I think it's important to note how Buck seems weary of his place at the table and he immediately diverts his attention to his safe person, Eddie. Eddie is simply smiling at him in reassurance and even does his little turtle face in a way to tell Buck, you got this, I believe in you, which then immediately causes Buck to smile. See, they have that effect on each other. A simple look and a soft smile that is reserved for each other is enough to make the other feel safe and loved.

The discussion about Buck's brush with death was clearly making Buck uncomfortable and it goes to show that just because he is back at work, doesn't mean he is magically over it. Him not being able to joke with the Chief and Mehta, when he was openly joking with Eddie and Chris at his loft indicates the lack of trust he has with them. He knows the Diaz boys and trusts them unconditionally. They're his safe space, his people and he can feel comfortable joking with them because he has also been honest with Eddie about his real feelings. It feels out of place to partake in the casual conversation of his death with people he barely knows. But Eddie, his person and support system is quick to correct Chiefl Williams when she mentions Buck being dead for 3 minutes.

W: So 3 minutes huh?

B: Uh what's that?

W: That's how long you were dead.

E: 3 minutes and 17 seconds.

Eddie does not want anyone to diminish the 17 seconds Buck was dead for because he had to live in a world without Buck for 3 minutes and 17 seconds. Like I mentioned in my last episode's meta, Eddie is clearly not over this traumatic event. The way his voice was so broken when he told Buck he died in 6.12 indicates that he is not fully over it himself. And one can't blame him because he lost his partner and co-parent for that amount of time. He grieved Buck like he would a spouse or longtime partner. So for Eddie, diminishing Buck's death to only 3 minutes does not do his grief any justice because he was gone for an addition 17 seconds that Eddie will not be forgetting about for a long time. It's also interesting to focus on Buck’s facial expression when Eddie looks at him and says that because he seems kind of stunned. Almost as if he had no idea that is how long he was gone for or that Eddie knew it down to the very second.

Eddie's heated looks throughout that entire scene were something completely out of this world. I mean they're his typical fond heart eyes, but there was a clear underlying layer of lust and attraction in his looks. He was looking at Buck proudly but also like his new math skills were doing things to Eddie.

I’m sure it was so wonderful to see Buck so confident and smug while he kept winning hand after hand. Once Eddie stopped playing, he comfortably stood behind Buck and supported him while he won. On one occasion, after Buck won a round, the camera pans to Eddie and he’s completely flustered. He’s smiling and ducks his head in a cute shy way one does when they’re flustered by a crush. Eddie isn’t fooling anyone. We all know what he is and at this point I don’t even think he’s trying to hide it.

Then we have the end of all the rounds where Buck has won big. When Chief asks him what he wants as his prize, I love that his immediate thought is to look at Eddie, his partner, before making a decision. This was such a bold and deliberate choice in having him do this because it signifies that these two are partners both on and off the field. Eddie was already looking at Buck before he turns around to him. You can see the actual change in Eddie’s facial expression the moment they make eye contact. His eyes are sparkling and his smile widens to his special Buck smile. It’s complete and pure love that’s translated on Eddie’s face. Simple as that. That’s a man in love and there’s no other explanation for that. Now whether his heart knows it and his mind still needs time to catch up, or he’s fully aware, we don’t know yet. But the eyes, they never ever lie and you can see the love shining from Eddie’s eyes.

All of this to win some steaks? Yeah you heard that. Eddie and his little puns weren’t lying when he said this was low steaks haha. I love how Buck is exasperated but Eddie is smug standing next to him. He even diverts to his usual love language of teasing when he tells the Chief Buck’s humor wasn’t affected by the lightning. Once again, their shared looks are so heated especially when Eddie’s looking at Buck when he’s not looking back. The Chief telling Eddie to leave his human calculator at the firehouse was hilarious because it was his idea to even bring Buck down to play poker and smoke everyone there. But Eddie’s a possessive and smug bastard so he got what he initially wanted and that was for his Buck to let loose and enjoy himself while he enjoyed watching him enjoy himself lol. I got to say, Eddie looking at Buck like this when he’s not looking back is making me feral. There’s heat there and he’s so smitten with Buck that it really shouldn’t be a secret to anyone who’s in their close vicinity. So if only Buck were to just turn around and really open his eyes, he’d have more answers to the questions he’s been looking for.

Jealous Eddie Makes a Return

I really don’t understand why Buck and Eddie were the only two that accompanied Hen with the call to the couple found in a compromising position but I’m not complaining. It was hilarious in my opinion and it brought with it a return of jealous Eddie!! Once again you see mirroring come to play when they are listening to the husband try to explain what happened during their sexy night. The way both their hands go up at the same time and how they tilt their heads clearly shows they are so in sync with one another.

When the husband brings up the statistics he read about how 80% of partners are not satisfied, we have Buck immediately use his newfound abilities to calculate all the women he has slept with. I love how Eddie immediately cuts him off. You can tell he did not want to hear about Buck's previous partners because he was exasperated but not in his usual fond way. The way he looks back at Hen and shakes his head is very much, "Can you believe he was about to talk about that in front of me?" Oh Eddie baby, that is not how best friends react when their best friend talks about previous partners. Nothing about Buck and Eddie is platonic as we all know and I love every time jealous Eddie makes a return because there is no other explanation that the fact that he is in love with Buck.

Buck and Christopher Bake Cookies

It is very important that the show tries to distinguish Buck and Christopher’s relationship separate to that of Eddie's if they want to audience to believe Buck can be the perfect partner to Eddie in all ways. We haven't gotten a Buck and Chris scene together in such a long time so it was nice to see them together without Eddie. And they weren't just doing anything. No they were doing such a domestic thing which was Buck making them dinner and then planning on baking cookies for Christopher's class. That is such a parental thing to do and I love that the show is trying to really highlight the difference in their relationship with each other verses what we saw earlier with Chimney and Denny.

B: So when I cook, I like to measure out all the ingredients. It uh makes me feel like an actual chef.

C: That makes me your sous chef.

B: Yes it does.

Now something about the wording of this really stands out to me. Sure they are talking about baking but like they also may be implying something else at the same time. @ktinastrikesback had a very good point and I have to agree with her. It almost sounds like if you were to take out the words chef, it can be Buck implying that sometimes he feels like an actual dad, and that makes Christopher like his son. That analogy fits in this scenario so I am sticking with it.

I also mentioned in another post how this scene with just the two of this is very important for the general audience so that they can start understanding the importance of Buck in not only Eddie’s life but Christopher’s as well. The way they tease each other and how Buck looks at Christopher so proudly and with so much unbridled love really does seem like a father and son to me. And now the whole storyline of the sperm donation makes sense because they’re going to try to distinguish the fact that biology does not make someone a parent as we saw with Denny and his biological father as well. Buck is just as much Christopher’s dad as Eddie even though he’s not biologically related to him. So I can’t wait to see how the rest of the season unfolds but I do believe this is where it is heading. To Buck becoming more intertwined with the Diaz family and eventually becoming a romantic partner to Eddie and another parent to Christopher.

Once again thank you to everyone who took the time to read this. I really think we’re on the way to Buddie going canon and I for one am very excited to see how the rest of the season plays out. We’re so close friends! If you’d like to be tagged when I post these weekly metas, please let me know here!

Thank you to the lovely @aa-lionheart for all the beautiful gifs 💜

#buddie #911 spoilers #evan buckley #eddie diaz #christopher diaz #the buckley diaz family #911 speculation #911 meta #buddie meta #buddie language meta #911 on fox

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tabithatwo · 11 months

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I know you'll be busy answering ship asks for awhile but like. I think So Much about how Nat would not have let Jackie die. Jackie's death only works for me because Nat has this perfect reason for not being there - out searching for Javi with Travis all night. Like they must've made a fire, and also had each other for warmth, but Jackie was just. Alone. And if Nat had seen her she would have DRAGGED her ass back inside suicidal tendencies be fucking damned !!!! Jackie: I'm gonna kill myself. Nat: NOT ON MY WATCH! But she wasn't there. She couldn't stop it. I'm so sad lmao. Also let me acknowledge Shauna's part in all this lol. This is gonna sound wild(?) Mayhaps but I almost feel like the wilderness kept her asleep? Does that make sense? Because here's the thing Shauna is 100% mean petty stupid stubborn etc enough to just. Not bring Jackie inside lmao and obviously none of them knew that it would snow, or that she wouldn't put effort into starting a fire. Jackie is also obviously all of those things as well and would not have come inside without Shauna going to get her. And I'm not trying to give too much weight to the vague supernatural element, it's tragic no matter what, but in my mind that Death Dream that Jackie and Shauna share was almost hypnotizing both of them in a way. And it could have gone differently. Like I read it as: their connection is that strong, Shauna sensed that Jackie was dying, and she COULD have woken up in time, she could have !!! But the wilderness wanted Jackie so it kept them both asleep and in that dream. This isn't something I've shared on here or told anyone lol it's just for me < 3 no one has to agree with it. I think the reason I buy into it is that yes Jackie and Shauna are dumb enough to create that ridiculous of a situation but for Shauna to sleep through the night.... Without waking once... Without some sort of influence THAT I find hard to buy. She would have been too anxious to fall asleep even. But, they were Out There, and they were both lulled into sleep, Jackie so she could die, and Shauna so she couldn't save her. And Nat had to be gone too, so the wilderness hid Javi away ((not literally, hopefully you get what I'm saying)) idk the 3 of them just make me so insane and so sad. It's always felt to me like Jackie died by the skin of her teeth, her girls would have, could have, should have saved her, but. The wilderness kept them at bay.

I did in fact proof-read this after the fact pls post this version (if you decide to post it at all) xnjxjxxjdj

ANON!!!!!!!!!!!! HELLO?????? YOU HAVE BLOWN MY MIND IN THE BEST WAY???? THANK YOU????

everyone clap for anon for putting this in my inbox cause holy HOLY! you. are. so. onto. something. and i cannot believe i never noticed this or connected these dots, because i am ALL ABOUT the wilderness/it using the dream realm to fuck with them. this is the natural conclusion to come to from that perspective!! like!! yes!! i always found it bizarre that shauna could fall asleep after the emotional fight of a lifetime/her secrets being exposed like that, and that is especially true when we see her up late in the attic over smaller things in s1 or over other big moments in s2. this in genius. i'm adopting this into my worldview i am obsessed this is everything. love love love it and thank you for dropping this wisdom in my asks!

#jackie taylor #shauna shipman #jackie x shauna #shauna x jackie #natalie scatorccio #asks answered #yellowjackets

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gorpiepng · 13 days

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it’s me again… guess who i’m requesting….. THATS RIGHT PEST *insert loud correct buzzer sound*

pest with a gn!reader whos very possessive of him

for some elaboration. the reader loves him to death and they get VERY jealous when pest is interacting with someone other than them. and if pest shows even a slight distaste for the conversation reader is strolling on in and cussing that person out and scaring them away but literally two seconds after the reader is the sweetest person in the world to pest

I FOUND THIS SUPER FUNNY TO THINK ABOUT SO HERE U GO

🗨️ a/n: OKAY BEFORE I SAY ANYTHING i am SO SO SO sorry this took so long .. !! THIS WAS REALLY FUN TO WRITE THANK YOU FOR MORE PEST REQUESTS <3 kinddd of projecting here a tad bit because I have bpd and heavily relate to this so umm teehee giggles

🗒️notes: gender neutral reader ofcofc, not really anything else huhhh reader is bpd coded a little me thinks

🪲Pest x A very possessive S/O ⋆.˚

The beetle boy finds your behavior amusing. He likes watching you scare strangers off with a stern stare or a more... ‘bold’ approach (barking 100% teehee). Although Pest can handle anyone bothering them with ease, they like to sit back and watch you work your magic. Not only do they find it cute, but your methods work 99.99% of the time soooo BONUS!!!

Your quickly changing attitude can be a little confusing for them but Pest is a very adaptable person which makes everything a whooooole lot easier. Since you’re quite the unpredictable person, Pest likes to play a little game with themself in their head and guess what you’re going to do next. And fyi he’s usually wrong. NEVER LET THEM KNOW YOUR NEXT MOVE 😎

Pest can be hard to read so it’s a little unclear whether he’s being neutral or actually irritated, so you have a little look you give each other as an okay for you to step in. Though if Pest is obviously bothered by someone you’re going right up to them and doing what you do best without warning

They enjoy your sweet side, too. The way you pamper him and give him your undivided attention makes him feel like the only person in the WORLD. Pest doesn’t show his appreciation through words but more so through actions. Swiping something you wanted but couldn’t afford off a store’s shelf, silently listening to you vent or rant WITHOUT offering unsolicited sarcastic advice, or even burning your favorite music onto a cd. Yes they know how to do that

If you manage to get your hands on any electronics Pest will ALSO gladly pirate games and movies for you too. As long as he can play them ofcofc, that stuff’s hard to come by in the elevator

Pest isn’t much different from you in a way. If the roles are reversed and someone happens to be annoying YOU... if you haven’t already handled it, Pest 100% will. Though they don’t have to put in much effort to be intimidating, it’s all the same. You get really really visibly happy whenever he does it and that’s one definite way you can get the beetle to blush lol

Honestly there’s nothing Pest doesn’t like about your possessiveness. It’s just a big bonus in dating you. Sometimes you can get a little too ahead of yourself and get way too heated, but that’s nothing Pest can’t fix with a little kiss :]

#regretevator #regretevator x reader #pest x reader #pest #pest regretevator

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ugh-yoongi · 11 months

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hello, friends 🫶🏻

just a psa/personal rant?? not really a rant but

i wanted to talk about a few things, and i think the cleanest and easiest segue is to say: i have left all of my writing networks. it is 100% nothing personal to any of them, i have enjoyed each and every one, but there are a few reasons why.

one, i am not active in any of the discord servers, so there was ✨anxiety✨ about not contributing and feeling obligated.

two (and this is the segue part): obviously these networks have a big reach, and i am feeling more and more anxious about exposing my work to the masses.

it’s a double-edged sword, because i write what i want and what makes me happy, but there is always a part of me that wants feedback and wants other people to see and enjoy it. but it has been tense here lately and the “please do not perceive me” feelings are REAL.

there is just… no nuance anymore. me posting “i don’t think it was a good decision for jungkook to go to qatar” turned into a bunch of anons calling me islamophobic and a bunch of other stuff. me saying it was a bad look for jimin to feature on a song by a r*pist turned into “you can’t have an opinion because you’re a rap line stan.”

i’m most certainly not perfect. i try to do the right thing. but tumblr has turned into a place where you will get bullied off the site if someone does not like you personally and decides you’re the internet’s villain of the day. you are put into situations you cannot win. if you defend yourself, you’re making excuses. if you don’t, you’re guilty and all those things people accused you of being are true.

it is literally this tweet:

this is not a fandom known for being welcoming of discourse, but we have to be able to give others grace. there has to be nuance. like, we are literally stanning bts, who have done and said and written problematic things. we should not excuse intentionally harmful behavior, but we need to be able to have conversations and believe, to a certain extent, that not everyone behaves in malicious ways.

we all fuck up and will continue to do so. i hope your mistakes are handled with grace and you are given the benefit of the doubt, and i hope you extend that grace when others inevitably make mistakes as well.

i am not involved in drama here. i am 31 years old and too old and tired. i just want to write and cry over seokjin and shitpost with my friends.

i’m sure this has all been said before, but: i was offline at the time everything went down with m (shout-out the fucking car accident i got in on my way to pick up my friends from the airport, why did this seemingly happen to everyone??) but they are someone i have interacted with both here and offline, and how all of that played out was fucked up, to say the least. others have explained it far more eloquently than me, but it bears repeating.

so while i love writing and i love sharing my work, there is a part of me that’s anxious every time i post. including this. i will continue to do so and hope that this site becomes warmer and more welcoming, because i see a lot of posts lamenting writers leaving or deactivating, and i just think: “well, yeah.”

enough has been said about interaction and the like/reblog ratio, which is definitely a huge part. it can be demoralizing to spend so much time and effort writing a fic that gets little interaction. but the environment is a big part, too, and i’m hopeful that can change.

(but also—protect your peace, whatever that means for you. unfollow that person. block that tag. you don’t have to engage with everything, especially if it raises your blood pressure. one of the few good things about the internet is that you’re largely able to curate your experience. don’t feel guilty about taking advantage of that.)

i will finish this by saying: i am always open to having conversations so long as they’re in good faith. it is not anyone’s place to police my behavior, but if i ever do or say something that is not cool, you are more than welcome to address it with me. i encourage you to do so. as flor once said: comfort can’t help me grow up.

love u all. pls be nice to one another. 🖤

#filed under: personal ramblings

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theparliamentofrooks · 7 months

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OKAY SO I HEARD ABOUT YOU BEING A COMPLETE YO KAI WATCH FAN AND BUCK ENJOYER AS THE BIGGEST BUCK ENJOYER MYSELF I WANT TO HWAR ABOUT YOUR HEADCANONS IF YOU WOULD NOT MIND, I WOULD LIKE TO INFO DUMP TO EACH OTHER ABOUT HIM BECAUSE HE IS SUCH A REAL CHARACTER I LOVE HIM

LIIIIIIIIIIIIIITERALLY THE CHARACTER EVER i will gladly drop everything i think about him (or like half of it at least) here. Absolutely. He taught me how it feels to have an obscure fave HAHA

One big thing is that I age up the Yokai Watch characters with me cause they're my No. 1 comfort characters, so Buck (and everyone else) are young adults (like 18). Also Buck is Mexican/Honduran because he has too much swag not to be

Out of the YW3 trio (Nate, Buck, Hailey) it's BUCK that's the smartest. He gets pretty good grades with minimal studying and only puts in effort for big exams. The first time Nate saw he got 100% on a test he was so mad because they blew the past week doing nothing but Yokai stuff

Also he's just really good leader material for the trio. Nate of course is the best leader for Yokai and everyone in general (when times are tough) but Buck thinks ahead well

Is extremely popular in town. Literally 65% of people know him by name. He's charismatic and makes friends easily when he wants to

Has a bad habit of laughing at jokes for a little too long. Nate has dry humor and when it catches Buck off guard he'll be snickering like half an hour after it dropped. "You're still laughing?" "It was funny!"

He initially gets envious of Nate and Hailey having Yokai watches but when they bring him to get one he's like damn wait these kinda look like ass. He strolls out of the Yopple store whistling and appreciating his necklace tenfold and the others are astonished.

(Whisper, diehard Yopple stan, wants to bite him for a week)

Five Assigned Yokai Partner: Shadow Venoct. Reasoning? Shadow Venoct is my favorite. Buck is my favorite. Plus it's cool like why not. I honestly think Shadow Venoct would meet Buck and they'd just click well because Buck wouldn't shy away from him. Shadow Venoct hangs out with him and Buck doesn't need a medal to summon him (just has to say his name with intent)

Buck has trust issues but they only flare up when new people are entering his circle. When Nate was becoming friends with his friends, Buck instantly got defensive and tried shaking him off. Same thing for Hailey suddenly befriending Nate, which makes Buck initially very standoffish with her. It felt like they were invading his space and he needed to know if they would click well before he started being friendly

Buck also eventually realizes that his family can naturally see Yokai, but he couldn't for some reason. (Or at least his sister Dorothy can). It saddens him deeply but he tries not to dwell on it too much. He's got his lucky UFO stone and that's what matters now

Okay back to fun stuff. HE'S THE MOST INSANE ONE ON ADVENTURES BECAUSE HE WON'T FUCKING SIT DOWN he's constantly on his feet poking around SOMEWHERE. Buck absolutely REFUSES to rest when there is something interesting and exciting he could be doing Nate has to cover him so often

Wishes he had the Yokai Watch Certified Pistol

I am a Nate/Buck yaoi truther (I want what they have so bad) but the comedic appeal of Nate being into his sister is also huge. Buck finds out Nate and Hailey are both vying for Dorothy's attention and proceeds to be a MENACE. Nate gets tossed into the ocean and Hailey has to cope with an anime figure release being pushed back

(Buck asked his parents to pull a few strings and refused to elaborate on when he became "interested in anime stock marketing")

Nate and Buck are absolutely gay for each other though. I don't do ships but it's undeniable it's just a fact. The one of like four ships I DO accept as my own

He constantly switches between calling Yokai 'Yokai' and aliens. It's a hard habit to break okay cut him some slack a burger with hands and legs is NOT a ghost LMFAO

Whisper and Buck sometimes butt heads. Buck will call Whisper out for Googling (YO-GOOGLING?) and Whisper reprimands Buck for doing risky things. Buck has also pulled on Whisper's tuft a few times but come on everyone else absolutely has understand his situation

Buck is effectively Nate's right hand man and vice versa. When Nate can't rely on Jibanyan or Whisper for something, his next stop is Buck

I HOPE THESE WERE FUN HEADCANONS TO READ!!!!!!! It has been a LONG time since I've thought hard on him but GOD I LOVE HIM HE'S THE BEST. THE CHARACTER EVER. Buck Hazeltine is a staple for my favorite characters he's THE face of "green characters that are witty, smile a lot, and five will inevitably love". Ugh he's awesome

And thank YOU for sending me this ask!!!! (I LOVE OPPORTUNITIES TO TALK IT'S MY FAVORITE ACTIVITY)

#yokai watch #yo-kai watch #buck hazeltine #mac hazeltine #ALSO FOR BUCK I DON'T DO WELL GETTING INFODUMPED ABOUT HIM FROM OTHERS. SO PLEASE DO NOT HAHA #i unfortunately grew so attached to buck i struggle to talk about him back and forth. i am much more comfortable going off solo #but don't worry that is LITERALLY just me. seeing your thoughts through your own post would still be super dope. GENUINELY!!!!!#b'art art #if i say anything is fact btw I DON'T MEAN IT LITERALLY I AM JOKING #five o'clock asks

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izunias-meme-hole · 7 months

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One Villainous Scene - “I Coveted That Wind I Suppose”

“Oh boy. Izunia is making a second OVS about Ganondorf.” Yes, I am… however I am going to be looking at the man, the myth, the One Shot Wonder himself, Wind Waker Ganondorf. Now this guy is considered one of the top 5 incarnations of the King of Evil for a few reasons; the design, Takashi Nagasako returning to voice him, the boss fight, but the main reason was a little unexpected addition to his character.

To explain, Wind Waker is set in a world where Hyrule got flooded under the ocean because Ganondorf was TOO close to winning, and there was no hero to stop him, in other words divine intervention happened. So, throughout the course of the game, Ganondorf searches for the other 2 pieces of the Triforce once again, starting with a 100 year wait for Princess Zelda to reincarnate, and after 100 years have passed he kidnaps literally any blonde girl with pointy ears, checking to see if they have the Triforce of Wisdom. And one of these girls was Link's sister, Aryll, meaning that this man just put this incarnation of The Hero, one who originally wasn't mean't to be in this destined bullshit, hot on his trial.

Throughout the course of the game Link has only seen a snip of him at the beginning, the damage he caused to Greatfish Isle, Phantom Ganons, and finally he sees the man himself at the Foresaken Fortress and gets saved by Tetra, Valoo, and King Daphnes. Then Link discovers that Tetra is in fact Princess Zelda, and a good long hours later Ganondorf gets ahold of her, and now our hero has to face this monster, only for the player and Link to see another end of him.

Ganondorf explains a part of his background, talking about the cruel and harsh desert that he grew up in and how he envied the grasslands of Hyrule, but never intended on having it all be buried underwater. If anyone has played Ocarina of Time, they know that he's half-lying out of his ass because yes, he did come from a brutal and harsh desert, but he was also an infamous king there, one who had great ambitions and sat in a tower built in Central Hyrule while everyone else suffered. In other words, this man is lying out of his ass, but it isn't in an attempt to manipulate Link... it's an attempt to convince himself that all of the destruction he's caused, all of the evil he's wrought, wasn't for nothing. Even someone who's never played OoT can tell that this is a selfish old relic who's committed a lot of horrors in the past and has convinced himself that they're all just. And even then, you can tell that he never actually desired destruction for the hell of it and carries regrets.

He then knocks Link out and unifies the Triforce, chuckling out of glee at the fact that he FINALLY is going to succeed, that his efforts won't be in vain, but then it's literally robbed from him when Daphnes touches it and wishes for Hyrule to drown for the future of Link, Zelda, and everyone else. This causes Ganondorf to have a full on breakdown, cackling hysterically as he realizes that everything he has ever done has been for nothing. His efforts to acquire the Triforce, his battle against the previous hero, and his current efforts to bring back Hyrule were all for nothing. He's a destructive being who's doomed to fail and he realizes it now, but he isn't going to lie down and be forgotten by this world, so he tries to kill Link and Tetra, only to be stabbed in the skull. At this point, he can't escape the inevitable and he knows it, so there's no cursing Link and Tetra, no swearing that he'll come back. He just dies.

In short, Ganondorf here is still a bastard, but he is a walking tragedy in this game due to his pathos. He's a man who wants to convince himself that everything he's done was worth it, a man who doesn't want to be forgotten by the tides of time, a man who wants to bring back a dead land and stop being the lord of a dead empire. Yet in the end, he realizes that all of his efforts were indeed for nothing, and he ends up dying inside of a drowned Hyrule, destined to be forgotten. You can’t help but pity him this time.

#ganondorf #ganon #the legend of zelda #legend of zelda #wind waker #one villainous scene #analysis

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saltminerising · 10 months

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I understand people being annoyed at the people bitching about the nesting achievements, or the applying items achievements, as those only require at temporary change in play style, but I find the number of people get mad at other people for pointing out the inaccessibility of the Runestones and Shock Switch achievements to be quite disheartening

I want to get the Shock Switch achievement, I have already devoted hours to trying, but my brain and body literally cannot move at the speeds required for it. As we can see by looking at the suggestions thread about lowering the requirements, this is the same for many other people

And yet, people in that thread and on drama blogs are complaining about how we just "want everything completed with no effort at all" or we "don't need to complete all the achievements, so why do you even care" or how we obviously just "don't understand how to actually play the game and are clicking at random"

I am willing to put the effort in. I have tried to put the effort. But when the board is moving at 100+ speed and my hand is seizing because I've been playing for 20 minutes and I only have a third of the points required for the achievement, it becomes obvious that the only way I'll be able to complete it is if I grow a new body

People love to act as if disabled people cannot be completionists, and if we are then really, it's our fault for being upset that some achievements are inaccessible, we should just be expecting it by now. There's totally no reason to try to make achievements achievable to disabled people, that would just be silly, and it would take away from the able people who worked so hard to get the achievements. Because disabled people aren't as important as abled people, why should we care if they want to be able to do the stuff other people do

I'm just. frustrated. by it all. I want to complete all the achievements. I have tried to complete them all, and I have completed all the ones that aren't time locked, except for this one horrible one. And people are acting as if I'm stupid for being upset by it

P.S. I brought up the Runestone achievement at the start because I have seen people pointing out it's inaccessibility, but I personally was able to complete it with relative ease since I have a good memory, so I didn't write about it in detail. I'd love to hear from people who have struggled with it

#long post #achievement woes #ableism

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aita-blorbos · 2 months

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AITA for not taking revenge over the death of my mom?

So my (M, 33) mom (F, 500-ish?) was murdered five years ago by this girl, let's call her A (F, 32). My mom and I had a great relationship, she taught me everything I know and I respected her a lot. To be honest she was kind of my whole reason to be alive? So her death affected me greatly, but also the idea of avenging her never crossed my mind.

I mean, my mom did kind of murder A's father in cold blood, and I do like A, she's a great gal, well, except for the whole, mom murdering thing, but, I mean, she kind of had a good reason, given the whole father murdering thing. Honestly this whole thing feels very vicious-cycle-of-violence thingy? And it's not like my mom would come back to life if I took revenge so, no point on killing A back, right? So I just, moved on from that.

However! Recently I learned that A had just... sort of been expecting me to avenge my mom? This whole time? Like apparently she made all these elaborated plans to protect herself from me and stuff? And apparently the reason she never returned to her town was because she was 100% sure I would go kill her if I knew where she was? Apparently she hasn't even contacted her loved ones as a way to, like, keep them safe or something? I don't get her logic tbh but whatever.

And, like, all this time I thought she was living this nomadic on-the-run sort of lifestyle because she liked traveling, but it turns out she was hiding from me????

Anyway this entire thing came to a head a week ago when this situation that's not relevant to the story forced us go work together for a couple of days.

It was the first time I saw her in person since she killed my mom, and I did notice she was very tense, but I thought it was just awkwardness given the whole, you know, mother killing thing. I mean, I was awkward too, like. How do you talk with someone who killed your mom, you know? Like, I like A, but, still, you know? But I still tried to be friendly and stuff.

Then, eventually, A just, she got really mad, and started yelling at me asking me what my "plan" was and "what I was playing at" and stuff, just convinced I had some nefarious scheme or something. I told her I had literally no idea of what she was talking about, but she didn't believe me, and I can tell the fact I didn't like, try to stab her or anything left her feeling disturbed.

Anyways, my point is, idk, I just feel kinda bad that she's putting so much effort avoiding some revenge plan that doesn't exist? And just, thinking about me waaaay more than I think about her? Like, I get the impression she thinks we're like, sort of arch nemesis now or something? When really I just think she's rad, like idk how to interact with her given, everything, but also she's just a rad acquaintance, you know?

I have considered just, actually doing some evil scheme or whatever, you know? To like, make her feel better and like she isn't wasting her time. Like, I get the feeling she WANTS me to be doing evil schemes and stuff to, idk, ease the guilt for killing my mom? So I thought of maybe actually planning one just so she felt better, but secret evil plans take so much effort and I just get SO bored!

So. I'm not, like, planning anything against her, really. I gave up on that, too much work.

But still, I feel like I'm kind of the asshole here since I'm not like, reciprocating this? She's putting so much effort on our supposed rivalry and stuff, and I don't even dislike her. And I mean, she put so much effort when it came to avenging her dad by murdering my mom, an yet I'm just, not doing anything. And idk. It just makes me feel bad, man. Like I'm leading her on?

So. Am I the asshole for not taking revenge like she's expecting me to?

#aita #am i the asshole #unreality

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showtoonzfan · 1 year

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Okay this video is about 6 minutes, (all of it is for good reason) but I need to say that every time I look at Viv’s art from today and how she clearly hasn’t improved, I just think back to how she responded to a fan mentioning anatomy in a late 2018 livestream back when she was working on the Hazbin poster:

She goes on to explain how she knows her art has flaws and that she’s not an expert at anatomy, but that she does know basic anatomy and only doesn’t use it because it’s an “aesthetic” style and thinks using it makes her character poses and all look boring so it drives her crazy when people bring it up. I show this because the problem with Viv is not that she’s not an expert at anatomy or wants her characters to look more appealing, but because you just clearly tell from 2018 to now, she clearly hasn’t changed or put in any effort to improve her art. Just because you want your art to not look stiff and boring, doesn’t mean you can’t experiment and actually do research to try to work to be better, which is something she hasn’t done. It’s funny because she’s said that characters like Vaggie’s anatomy is unrealistic but that’s literally ALL her characters because they’re all fucking sticks. Also apparently she doesn’t know that your art can still look good and have pushed expressions and movements WHILE also being consistent right??? The thing that just bugs me is that she acknowledges she knows her art is unrealistic and not perfect but it’s as if she uses that as an excuse to not improve upon it. When it comes to me personally, I’m not asking Viv to be god and have 100% realistic shapes and everything because no one is perfect, but I am asking her to actually branch out her character shapes as well as doing research to TRY to improve because her art has done nothing but downgrade. I feel the reason why her art looks the way it does today is probably because she still has this refusal to listen mindset I’m sorry, but that’s just me.

#also you can tell she’s clearly pissed and that it bugs her when people critique her art #I legit hate her attitude in this video I’m sorry #cause in my eyes she’s clearly trying to reject anyone pointing out her flaws and just downplaying it by admitting those flaws herself but-#not actually improving #I love how she says Vaggie has no anatomy and I’m like…yeah because you didn’t give her any LOL #vivziepop critical #spindlehorse critical #hazbin hotel critical #hazbin hotel criticism #character design talk #character design #vivziepop art critique

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youngtomhardy · 1 year

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LSD (2023) promo shot by Camila Noriega. Edited by Euan.

For as long as I can remember I feel like I’ve had to fight for everything in my life. When my parents outed me, I was verbally abused and eventually made to sleep in the garage. It wasn’t so bad, my dad had converted it into a makeshift studio right before. So there was carpet, insolation, etc. Still it was fucked up, I was only 15 at the time. I only had my bed, some books, and a lot of hurt. I ended up running away for weeks in order to show them I wouldn’t tolerate the mistreatment. It worked, but only because I fought.

Let’s go even farther back: I picked up music by ear in middle school, this is where I learned about my perfect pitch ability. I was quick to learn, dedicated, and honestly a natural born talent. For some reason though, the band teacher seemed to hate it. I understood his annoyance when I would only play the top line rather than my part. But what about later, when I learned to read music? He seemed to hold a grudge, always talking down to me. My friends would openly talk me up to the director in an effort to move me to 2nd or 1st chair. Still, he never budged. This attitude continued with future instructors all the way up until my senior of high school, where they seemed to finally appreciate me. I always checked myself to see if I was rude or cocky, thinking maybe a kind demeanor would win them over. Looking back, I had 0 confidence so that wasn’t it... I just did my best. At the end of my senior year I finally got 2 awards, one including a small scholarship that helped pay for my laptop. That went a long way and I’m grateful, but damn did I have to fight for any type of recognition in my youngest years.

Flash forward a few years, I’m trying to break into the industry as an artist. I have like 300 listeners and it’s starting to slowly grow after my collab with Steve Grand. I see a lot of small queer artists getting press on a VERY popular music publication — no, it’s like THE music publication. I decided to shoot my shot… BOOM. Sexually harassed by the head editor! From the very first message!!! Why am I surprised at this point? I decided to play along in hopes of getting a feature, because who wouldn’t? I was powerless. I remember he was trying to sext me while I was in Mexico visiting family. It was humiliating. I respectfully shot it down and the next day he suddenly, “didn’t have the bandwidth” to feature my upcoming single Fluids. Go figure. Luckily, a group of other very small artists that were being harassed came forward and made a big fuss in the press. I knew I had to make my voice heard, this was my only chance to put an end to it. Guess what? We did. Finally, once that editor was removed, I finally got my first ever major feature. Crazy how much went into that single moment, huh? Once again, I fought.

Now, I face an entirely new monster. An invisible one that is literally programmed to be biased. As much as everyone wants to deny it, it’s true. TikTok. The beast that every artist — small to big — is enslaved by until further notice. Now let me say, I truly am thankful for the growth that the app allows. I’ve never had such easy access to an entire audience. That being said, and i know this sounds dramatic, but it’s just 100% true… we’re in hell. This app is relentless. The pressure to blow up is insane. The pressure to then maintain it once you do blow up is insane. The low attention spans. The coming and going of big name labels. And when you don’t blow up, when you don’t get an offer, when views suddenly plummet… you spiral and think, “what’s wrong with me? what aren’t I doing right? aren’t I interesting enough?”

Directly after that spiral, you go to an influencer party or a label mixer where you meet a kid just like you. Perfect pitch, musical savant, a natural born talent. Just. Like. You. Except they come from a family that loves who they are & nurtures their talent. They get found by Justin Fucking Bieber, just by chance! They get an A-List songwriter as their mentor. They date an A-List teen celeb. Everything lined up for them from day fucking 1. So they’re cocky, arrogant, a little snobby, but overall pretty kind when you’re around. You don’t even have room to be jealous. It’s more like, this deep sadness knowing what could’ve been. It’s toxic thinking so I try not to let my mind go there.

Instead, I try to be okay with knowing my story is different — long, winding, sometimes painful, but always beautiful. I won’t stop fighting until I get what I deserve. Not now, not ever.

- Disco Dad

#michael medrano #disco dad #stache papi #tumblr diary #leather #hot pink #retro futurism #pop music #pop star #indie artist #dear diary #music industry #me

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selfproclaimedunicorn · 6 months

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Director's Cut! Tell me about how the concept of the story came about and why you chose to go in this direction! (my body is ready for spoilers). Daemon's portrayed as a good father, we know he loves his kids even if the show wants to leave that on the literal cutting room floor, so how do you manage this approach with this story?

Oh boy. This...this is good. I am going to get rambly, & I will probably wind up delving into my version of Daemon like I did with my Rhea here, so it's below the cut!

In my heart of hearts, I truly believe that, even though Daemon likes his kids (even within show canon, what with the deleted scene of him with his daughters), he would not be able to let go of how much he resents Rhea Royce for not being someone he picked (nor would have picked if given any input on the situation). I just kind of revel in writing Severe And Complicated Daddy Issues (SOTF ain't my first Daddy Issues rodeo, I've got a whole drabble collection of that with one of my older OCs), & the idea of Rhea/Daemon kids who want to get vengeance for their mom is just kind of a concept that spoke to me.

In terms of my approach to Daemon & how it works within the world of my fic: it's just sort of "he's making how he feels about their mom & the fact they aren't wholly Valyrian his kids' problem." He doesn't hate the Royce siblings, he hates what they represent. And that combined with his selfishness, easy boredom, lack of forethought/planning ahead, & disregard for responsibility just make an absolutely delicious cocktail that I am sipping up & having the time of my life exploring. He built up in his mind that was going to have Valyrian looking sons (exclusively), and then he didn't get that. He's got a son with brown in his hair, a daughter who "can't even have heterochromia the right way," & his youngest son he had exclusively to claim a dragon looks so much like a Royce that the only proof he was even in the room is that boy's purple eyes. So now every time he looks at them he's just reminded of what "his dumb wife he doesn't want because she's not Valyrian & she's a bitch who doesn't think he's cool" has "denied him."

They were all cool when they were brand new & he could be a little delusional about it, but they stopped being fun pretty quickly so he just decided to dip. Don't have to address the issue & let your kids know you're taking things out on them if you aren't around them! And they're partly him, so there is something redeeming there, he can't hate them! But he doesn't view them at all in a healthy way, so it screws everything up. He wants admiration, loyalty, & respect from his kids with Rhea. He wants whatever they can do to benefit him. He manipulates them & tries to mold them in a way that can compensate for being part Andal/part First Men, while projecting both himself & prescribed faults from not being 100% Targaryen onto them.

The oldest/the twins are denied cradle eggs & never encouraged to claim dragons because he doesn't think they're capable of it just because they aren't 100% Valyrian, but when they both claim dragons & prove capable he immediately wants to have a son that can claim another of the older dragons. Meanwhile, Aemon exists solely to claim Silverwing, & Daemon puts basically no effort into him because he's not old enough to do so yet. He lost valuable years of trying to endear himself to his younger son by scaring him off with his explosive temper, & then going off to war & missing his first years of being, like, aware. He's genuinely surprised that the literal toddler who sees him 3 times a year thinks another man is his father.

Dinner was tense and awkward. Failed attempts at gaining his brother’s attention and at being reinstated as heir, the faltering relationships with his oldest children as they grew too old to be easily manipulated as pawns, living in the same place as his wife for two weeks, and his youngest son’s insistence that it was Ser Gerold who was his father had made Prince Daemon even more sullen and volatile than he usually was. He sat at the opposite end of the table from Lady Rhea, picking at the wing of a chicken that was on his plate. Yorick and Ella sat on either side of their mother, both awkwardly eying their father from where he sat so far from them. Aemon was in his nursery. Even after a fortnight, the memory of the prince’s outburst at being adamantly denied the title of either “papa” or “kepa” had apparently stayed fresh in the little boy’s mind, and he had taken to hysterics to keep from having meals in the same places as the prince.

- Yorick 5: Zaldrīzdōron

He wants Yorick to be a tiny him so bad it makes him look stupid. He only keeps him around instead of being physically absent because he knows Viserys loves him [Yorick] in the most weird, projectiony way due to looking an alarming amount like the late Prine Baelon, blatantly ignoring him unless it's to train him to the point of exhaustion to try & wring perfect technique out of a literal child. He knows zero things about his own son, & because he beat his ability to speak up back with with a stick Daemon just thinks he's cool with whatever & will happily go along with his wants because he has no choice but to be molded into A Model Valyrian™. "Of course my son will be happy to curry favor with my brother for me, lose his virginity at 13 to a prostitute I hand picked for him, be a sex pest to other young teen girls, & then marry his sister as soon as she gets her period! That's what I want for him!" And then he's surprised when Yorick is unhappy with him...only then go on to actually feel pride when Yorick decides to resort to threats to get what he wants (even if they're against him). Because "yes, finally, he's acting how I've been trying to make him."

Meanwhile, he does have a kid that has the capacity to become just as fucked up as he wants Yorick to be...and he does nothing with that because he doesn't like the gender. He literally only puts in the effort to manipulate Ella into staying loyal & affectionate because that's simply what he does with young girls because he thinks that's all he needs to do & then he'll just get what he wants. "Insert kindness coins till she wants to be a child bride who has sex with her brother. Girls aren't more complex than that." He doesn't know how to extrapolate how he normally is into something he can't be a creep about, so he just doesn't really try that hard with her.

By the time episode 5 (chapter 13) roles around Yorick hates Daemon because of everything he made him go through & put up with before he was old enough to be independent from him, Ella has finally started to see how much he sucks because she's old enough that people have stopped shielding her, & Aemon simply doesn't know him. And as soon as he realizes he can't get what he wanted after 17 years of "trying," that they are all more loyal to their dead mom than the man who killed her, he starts burning bridges. And, on a level, I don't think he ever stops wanting the loyalty & the respect & the affection he initially did from them, because this is Daemon & he just wants people to pay attention & love him, but at this point none of them can give each other that. He can't be a father to Yorick, Ella, or Aemon, & they can't be the children he wants, so it all just gets...weirder & worse & more complicated. None of them get over each other no matter how hard they try.

And that's what it's all about. Toxic, co-dependant resentment.

#asks #fic: sins of the father #sotf commentary

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giddlygoat · 1 year

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tbh i did not know who cyrus borg is nor have i ever interacted with the ninjago fandom but i am obsessed about him. blorbo via osmosis.

anyways if you have any headcanons about him i would like to hear them :3c

cyrus borg my beloved blorbo babygirl <3

thank you for asking about this man. he is like a chew toy for my brain. hold onto your butt bc it’s 2 am as of writing this and that’s when all the big brained stuff happens

in his mid/late thirties and slaying <3 he started his tech business at about 17 and now he’s got a crazy monopoly on like half the city but it’s okay bc he’s a kind philanthropist and actually treats his employees like human beings so no one cares that he’s effectively one of the most powerful men in the city lmao

i see cyrus as autistic and adhd tbh. the way he gets so hyper focused on his work that he literally does not perceive anything else around him is a bit too relatable, and he strikes me as a very brilliant man who simply does not retain information unimportant to his interests. he could tell you the precise components of the most advanced computers and explain their relationships with one another, but hell if he knows who the president is. you’re lucky if he even remembers what day it is. this man constantly uses reminders and alarms for sure.

he’s on the aroace spectrum i think. i’m not exactly sure how but he just gives me those vibes.

also transmasc swag tbh?? i think i’ve seen that hc around and it goes hard

hear me out. cyrus listens to rap. this is based on absolutely nothing at all i just know it with my very being. he likes stuff with fast, predictable and heavy beats. would totally blast shit like masquerade by siouxxie sixxsta at full volume in his office. it helps him get in the zone. idk what to tell you man [<- 100% projection]

cyrus is like. absolutely fascinated by zane. he admires dr julien’s work so much and wants to study zane under a microscope. as he gets to know zane better personally though, i think he would realize that he has been looking at things through the lense of an engineer for so long that he forgot zane was just like his human family. it’s not that he ever viewed zane as simply a machine, quite the opposite - he fully acknowledged that dr julien had created a full person, and an incredible one at that - but cyrus still has to remind himself that people don’t like being poked and prodded. [the moment he makes the mental connection between zane getting put on an examination table and himself getting operated on by the overlord against his will, he realizes the error in his line of thinking]

oh yeah. the trauma! yeah cyrus might be just a little bit majorly fucked up over the overlord thing. the overlord did amputate his right arm after all, which leaves him with only one fully functioning limb. he still has nightmares about it. getting used to a prosthetic arm wouldn’t have been such a hurdle if the overlord had put any sort of thought or care into the operation, but it left him severely scarred up and just fucked in general. however! as the years pass he becomes pretty much fully accustomed to his situation and doesn’t let it inhibit his creative passions.

also when zane died in s3 cyrus was super broken up about it and blamed himself for it in part. then, not days later his daughter disappeared for reasons he would not understand until like a year later, which totally messed him up. he inevitably threw himself into his work in an effort to not feel anything. he didn’t take very good care of himself during this time. when zane returned from chen’s island, he let pixal explain everything to cyrus, who was just glad they were alive, but the whole situation took a really long time to get over.

when he’s hyper focused he forgets to eat/sleep etc and can run on fumes for hours before his body suddenly becomes a wet paper towel in a parking lot at 3 am and he has to konk out at his desk. thankfully he has people looking out for him, and he’s slowly getting better about it, but once he gets started sometimes the only way to stop is by brute force.

i absolutely love @alanshee’s amazing cyrus headcanons, so you should totally go check out her takes. she has some really cool headcanons about his 16 robot children [in reference to a line where cyrus mentioned pixal was the 16th iteration, i believe] and they always make me smile so big. a lot of my headcanons are inspired by her stuff!

[sorry for the late ass reply it’s been a crazy week and then i forgot rip but thank you sm for the ask!!!]

#asks #cyrus borg #ninjago #headcanons and theories

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doomednarrative · 1 year

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So this is a thought that I’ve been mulling over as I keep watching Donbrothers, and after finishing episode 44 it’s one that finally fully formed in my mind, and I think I have the words to articulate it in writing now.

It’s a thought about Taro Momoi. As the Red Sentai Ranger he’s obviously going to impact the story a lot, it’s in his nature to from the moment the series starts. But there’s one specific aspect of his character that keeps catching my focus, and it’s his inherent inability to lie about anything and everything.

The thought that I keep coming back to is that if you chose to watch Donbrothers with a queer reading in mind, that specific characteristic has such a farther reaching impact on both Taro and the narrative as a Whole.

(And before I go any further, I’ll put my little disclaimer here that this is not me saying you Should watch Donbrothers with this reading or anything to that effect. It is after all at its base level a sentai show meant to sell cool toys. You don’t have to give it this depth, it’s fine without it. I however am a queer person and I find it fun to do these kinds of readings as a thought experiment and I like writing about it for others to read.)

But anyhow.

Putting the rest of my thoughts under a read more because it got very long ~

The thing that gets me about Taro and his inability to lie and the fact that he has such an obvious tell for when he Is lying - that being that it literally kills him - is that it Forces Taro to go through his life living as his 100% authentic self. There is no way for him to hide from the rest of the world, no shield of little white lies or even a false persona that he can put on to keep himself from getting hurt. And he’s more than aware that A. His inability to lie Does hurt other people, which in turn hurts him as well, and B. It often puts him at odds with others due to how it can make him come off as ruder or more careless than he might mean to be. But it’s not something that he can change about himself. He’s tried, multiple times, and it’s just not something he’s capable of doing no matter what effort he puts into it.

And this has been a persistent issue for him since early childhood. It’s this very fact about Taro that makes an entire village move away when he’s still a young boy because in his attempts to help people by being honest and upfront with them, he drove them to hate him for his perfectionist streak instead. He couldn’t soften his words or tell them that they were doing just fine but that he wanted to help them, instead everything comes off blunt and matter of fact and over time it drove people away from him, until only he and Jin were left in their little neighborhood.

Taro’s inability to lie is something that the rest of the Donbrothers challenge him on throughout the entire series. It’s something that they actively either try to work to get him to break on, or they bemoan the fact that it’s not something he can fix about himself. Sometimes this is played for laughs, but more than a handful of times it’s also the cause of actual annoyance or even a level of anger from Taro’s teammates directed at him for this thing that he cannot change about himself. Over time Taro has learned a good bit how to at least supplement his blunt honesty with some careful phrasing so that he’s not as rude to people about things, but this still doesn’t change the fact that he cannot lie, and therefore cannot change a core part of himself or use lying as a way to shield himself from things like the others can.

That’s exactly why its such a huge deal to him when Sonoi is the first person to show up in his life, very early in the series, and tell Taro upfront that not only is his honesty a fine trait that he has, but that it’s also something he likes about Taro. Sonoi, before their shock at finding out each others true identities, literally calls Taro his hope and reaffirms when Taro comes to him about this issue more than once that he thinks Taro is fine as he is. This is something that I think ends up being a huge part of why the two of them end up still being close even after all of the fighting and literally killing and reviving each other that goes on through the series. Even after the many shocks and betrayals, the fact that their relationship (whatever you chose to view it as/whatever the narrative might imply it is) started with such openness and honesty makes for a very good foundation for the two of them. There’s already so much out in the open at that point that neither of them can pull back for long. Sonoi’s efforts to do so barely last more than a few episodes, and Taro never stops being anything less than genuine with him in all of their interactions from the first time they meet.

And speaking of Sonoi and his fellow Noto companions...

Sonoi may not have a problem with lying in the literal sense like Taro does, it certainly doesn’t kill him at least and he can lie with his words all he wants with no repercussion physically. But as the series goes on, you start to see that he’s lying to both himself and his teammates about a lot of things, and it slowly stops working and starts becoming something that is an actual roadblock for not just himself but for Sononi and Sonoza as well. And Sononi and Sonoza are also lying to themselves and each other as well, and it’s not working for Any of them! Sonoi has to be called back to the purpose of their work multiple times in the beginning of the series because it becomes clear to the others that whatever fascination he has with Taro is beginning to impede their goal of wiping out the Hitotsuki, and then post the first time he kills Taro, he visibly Wilts and states that he does not like himself for what he’s done. He becomes unable to lie to both himself and to Sononi and Sonoza that he’s happy with this outcome even though he should be. He’s a Noto who just took down Don Momotaro! In any regular circumstance, this would be something that he’d be proud of, no matter the method he used to do so. But because he did so by exploiting Taro’s inability to lie to him, something that he told Taro multiple times he liked about him, his victory rings hollow, and instead becomes something he’s actively upset that he did, even when the others think he did just fine. It’s why he helps to bring Taro back, it’s why they both agree to a fair duel that they won’t regret, it’s a catalyst for so many things later on down the line.

Sonoi’s inability to lie to himself and keep going with his duties as a Noto general without interference is what eventually leads to his realization in episode 44 that he and Sonoza and Sononi are all alike in the fact that they’ve grown attached to or become fond with humanity, and this fact puts a target on all of their heads and makes them enemies to their own people. Sononi got so caught up in the love affairs of Tsubasa and his search to bring the real Natsumi back that she fell for him in the process and took multiple hits to protect him, and it almost kills her! And Sonoza, who only ever wanted to understand human emotions and how they work, ended up as the manga editor to a teenage girl who he genuinely wants to see flourish in her work that brought him such joy and who’s respect he’s earned in the process. All three of them start off the series as very serious in their duties to take out the Hitotsuki (and later the Beastials) and slowly over time it gets so put to the back burner due to the connections they’ve made that even their superiors had to intervene to remind them of who they are and what their purpose is. And in the end even that doesn’t work. Not only can they not lie to themselves after a point, but they can’t lie to Sonoshi either. And he makes it very clear what kind of mark that puts on them and their fates before eventually leaving them to their own devices again.

Sonoi, Sononi, Sonoza and Taro are all alike in the fact that they end up being unable to lie/hide things about themselves to themselves or others for one reason or another about core parts of who they are. And it’s this fact alone that either puts them in direct danger, or makes their attempts at navigating the world around them a lot harder than it might otherwise be if they could just lie and shove things under the rug.

I don’t personally read Sononi or Sonoza as queer themselves, but in the case of Taro and Sonoi specificallty, especially with how the overall narrative hints at things and all of the imagery and implication and even outright textual statements, I think it becomes very easy to see how this can all be viewed in a queer light. It at least rings true for me as someone who went through the struggle of being unable to hide myself and having to pay the price for it by running from my home and the dangers that staying there held for me.

Seeing as I haven’t finished the series yet I have no clue if this is something that the Noto trio will end up doing for themselves, but I wouldn’t be at all surprised if they had to do so, and that in itself would lend even more weight to the comparison I’m trying to make here. Either way, it’s been an emotional journey to watch all of these characters come to the place that they are now in the narrative and how they’ve grown and are trying to make their way in the world as they are, and it’s certainly not something I’ll be forgetting anytime soon.

#avataro sentai donbrothers #donbrothers #taro momoi #momoi taro #sonoi #my meta #kief rambles about donbros #god this took me forever to get down so im sorry if it reads a little disconnected or anytging #i tried my best to convey what i was thinking here

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neptune-ian · 17 days

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on top of looks and aesthetics, i feel very alienated from the rest of society and how it regardless of the era still wants young women to be a certain way to fit in, im sure some people mean it when they say looks dont matter but they 100% do, obviously men my age have their ideals of women but i dont want to resort to wearing clothes that look like they would fit a child or a small dog

then theres mbti nowadays and other things like compatability to take into consideration, i feel like even if i tried to get myself to like what other women like it would feel like im forcing it on myself. one thing i refuse to do is cutesy kawaii or that cottegecore or whatever else thats generically girly again maybe if i was younger and id have this "aesthetic" from a younger age but in my age idgaf anymore, i dont even care for expensive brands either thats what i mean unless we force ourselves to care then its going to be even slimmer chances of meeting someone

we didnt have these labels when i was younger its honestly so ridiculous to say we should or shouldnt find somenie attractive based on one single attribute like fashion or body or appearance or makeup sadly a lot of younger guys seem to be really really specific in how their ideal typr should appear to be thats probs why i wouldnt appeal to anyone i have no particular style no aesthetic neither pretty nor ugly just average in everything and at everything

like they say they could want nerds or geeks but its still very vague and vein. honestly i dont think i have a type of guy anymore due to the fact i have never been asked if we have never been asked we must not fit in to what they want in a woman, which is usually someone who wants kids and they must be extroverted or loud and obnoxious or they must wear the skimpiest clothes and go partying or have a large social circle. the thing i find baffling is why do other girls not feel pressured to be all that bc when people request for idols again theyre very adamant on exactly what they want so ik im none of their fs lol

id have to alter the way i am some way or other and i dont have the energy for it anymore. in college i literally wore similar or repetitive outfits all bc i couldnt be arsed to stand out and all the other girls in my class were treating college like it was a fashion show or statement they had to make one girl i knew she took an hour to get ready her makeup would match her nails would match her outfit and bags would all match. bruh it takes me roughly 5 mins if that to put an "outfit" together no makeup if people dont like the way i look or dress screw it all i will be single until i die and i dont care anymore

thanks for replying to my rambling asks i appreciate it as no one else seems to discuss these issues among society

MBTI is lile Astrology. It’s not scientically proven and even psychologists don’t like that concept so why do you take consideration of it?

Sorry anon but it’s a bit stupid to consider compatibility stuff as something « important » or « real » to have and maintain a relationship. That prooves that you just can’t see how life really works because it doesn’t revolve around those compatibility things. It revolves around efforts, time, patience, understanding, compromise, (sometimes sacrifices), love and compassion etc.

In SK they believe in the blood type compatibility. Will you trust that too to believe if you’d have a chance to be in a relationship??? That’s so much absurd. Anon wake up! 😂 open your eyes the world is bigger than what you see and feel like. It’s more than MBTI, Astro, Tarot, Blood type or whatever else. I am a Pisces rising and yet I still am not that close to Pisces. Astro is not a big deal honey. It’s a tool just like MBTI and Enneagram and whatnot. It’s not meaningful stop trying to find reasons to lower yourself or your situation but you do you at the end lol. I will NEVER use astro or MBTI to know whether or not I should date a guy. Don’t think that those things dictate your life cause it is not and you will just stay stuck up. But maybe your a defeatist and believe you can’t control some area of your life and that’s on you…

I am someone I would consider myself as average and I am okay with it because what’s the point of being attractive to 99% of the world? My worth doesn’t revolve around my beauty… I am much more than appearance. I am also more than my flaws and qualities as well. I am a human, a sentient being with aspirations, beliefs, dreams, will, hopes, fears, like and dislike, struggles and strength. I don’t care if x and y don’t care about that, I care about myself. You should do too anon :)

I don’t need to be on fleek every single day, I don’t need to feel desired everyday. How do you think Marylin Monroe felt even though she was desired and loved??? She felt lonely.

Just be true to yourself and stick with it, stop thinking the world is against you and isn’t helping you because clearly as you are telling about « compatibility » as some sort of « truth »… put yourself together because that’s litterally how you will NEVER find someone anon. You are your own enemy but… you know the song :

You do you anon~ 🙂‍↕️

#neptune’s anon ask #neptune’s talk

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simpjaes · 2 months

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i just finished player rank: platinum. like literally two seconds ago and omg…god your mind 😫😫😫

first of all, i know it sounds contradictory cause it took me forever to finish reading, but god it was so entertaining from the first word. your writing is so good i felt like i could visualize everything (especially the smut)!!!!

speaking of the smut, that was so nasty…ik he’s an asshole loser but i’d also like my turn with heeseung. like slut me out like that in front of your friends too please!!!! it’s 11:30 am as im typing this, and i should really NOT be feeling this way so early in my saturday 😭😭😭

ngl if i were yn id fuck the whole friend group no hesitation, especially jay. but that’s the jay whore in me speaking oopsies.

plotwise, the whole story went 0-100 from the pillow scene in onwards imo. i was SEATED. felt like a whole will they won’t they type of situation even tho we knew they would. fuck heeseung fr tho (both literally and not) 🙄🙄

also the way you made me wanna punch and fuck heeseung at the same time…god i know i already praised you for how you write characters but goddamn u did it again!!! he’s such an ass omg but the way he fucks…🤭

and yn with her whole wanting to be better than her sister. why did that actually kinda hurt my heart even though i do not have a sister LMAO.

also i loved your little jokes…like the joke about sunghoon finding the perfect video on page 86 of his search. i actually laughed, perfect placement of the joke tbh.

last…yn’s sister using a condom AND plan B?!?! she mad paranoid and also her period cycle probably mad fucked up. also plan B is at least like $35 (off brand) and like $50 if u get the usual brand. no wonder she working so much, has to pay for all that fucking plan B. 😳

anyways gonna go scroll though all the asks related to this fic 🫶🏽🫶🏽 and then maybe…get started on frenzy (i’ve never read a fic like frenzy so im scared 😳)

- 💗

alright lemme dip into this and answer you properly <3

it's not contradictory!!! it takes people different amounts of time to read so that doesn't bother me at all! i promise im not forcing you to read everything RIGHT NOW!!! though, of course, i love your feedback and would love if you did make it through my fics :D

as for heeseung, i def wrote him to be an asshole but like...one that you could fuck anyway. some of us just wanna have fun with a red flag, and it's fictional so i see no issue with it :D as for fucking the friend group, since the fic was a gift for my favorite oomfie i didn't want to self indulge too much. it was heeseung centered both in mind and spirit, however i will definitely delve into fucking all of hyung line in a fic someday c:

yeeeeeeeeah the pillow scene was the instance in my head where heeseung was 100% certain he had her in the palm of his hand, so parading around like a sex magnet would come naturally for him rather than needing to put effort in. it was fucking play time for him, so yes, 0-100 is a perfect way to describe that point in the fic. he really switched it up from being blatantly interested to what the fuck does he want with me?????

i also do tend to add some jokes and comedic relief in my fics solely because it's who i am as a person. a lot of my humor is very dry and read as a narrator voice but i feel like it comes across well :D at least in MY head it does.

as for the birth control AND plan B. we all know it's unhealthy and not viable at all. it's actually quite cringe that she'd be so paranoid and do such a thing. it's also very much not realistic, so i don't quite enjoy when people come at it like "i just know her body is blahblahblah"

like.....yeah, but the point of that was to show how like.....there's a question there regarding how she feels about her relationship. reader's sister very clearly works hard and barely has time for a relationship, hence why she does just about everything to keep heeseung, but like......hee wants a kid and a family........and she adds EXTRA protection simply bc she probably suspects heeseung to poke holes or some shit.

it's not meant to be seen as "she's so uptight!!!" it's more like "now why would she feel the need to do that?!"

its bc heeseung is a manipulator through and through :D so im a lil sad that the instance flew over people's heads, but, it is what it is and it's just a small moment in the fic so i aint that annoyed.

#ask #💗 anon

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