#I know probably everyone who gets fired says they were about to quit anyway but genuinely

[spudangle]

Companion Bed/Sleeping Preferences

Lae'zel. Brought up as a warrior she definitely prefers practicality over comfort. Big luxurious soft beds are not for her, they’re too much of a hassle to get in and out of, not proficient at all. But if she has to, then she can pretty much sleep anywhere, be it while lying down, sitting, or standing. If she were to choose, she would probably prefer a hard surface over a soft one, so that her back feels nice and straight in the morning. She’s probably the companion who goes to bed first if she’s not on watch duty, and were it not for the elven companions then she would also be the one to wake up first quickly getting ready for the day. However she’s NOT allowed to sharpen her sword until after everyone else has gotten up.     

Shadowheart, too, has been trained to be able to sleep under most conditions, and a comfortable bed hasn’t really been commonplace for her under Shar.

But unlike Lae’zel, Shadowheart would actually enjoy having a bit of comfort in her life, especially after leaving Shar. It’s just something that she has to rediscover gradually. The feeling of the soft warm bed that she has at the Elfsong—a stark contrast to the cold stone of her old bed—is nice, but she almost finds it too warm at first quickly having to throw off her duvet to not overheat. The smell of clean linens however is perhaps her favorite thing, reminding her of a childhood long forgotten. Post-game she would probably enjoy having her own sleep rituals that she can do for herself and not to appease some cruel goddess. 

Astarion is a man of luxury. That means that he wants as big and soft a bed as possible, he practically wants to drown into the mattress. And it HAS to have clean silk sheets, he is done with damp dirty sheets that smell like they’ve been fucked to death. The bed is preferably a curtained four poster so that the warmth can’t escape, because obviously the bed has been warmed up by a bed warmer before he gets in. I know that there are several takes about the wooden board that he has in his tent, but I personally believe that it's there so he doesn't have to place his bedroll directly on the dirty ground. Anyways, Astarion wants a comfortable bed because he is a creature of comfort, and if can’t rest peacefully then he can at least suffer while in a comfortable bed. 

Gale also is a man of comfort when it comes to beds. His bed in Waterdeep has at least ten pillows, however he can only sleep with one otherwise he gets neck pain. The extra pillows are there so that he can sit comfortably while reading in bed. The bed itself is probably also really pompous looking, not exactly like the one from his last night alive scene, no it’s more pompous than that, it’s probably round. Yes it’s round. It’s a round four poster, decorated with golden constellations and heavy velour curtains hoisted up with thick tasseled ropes. And boy did he miss his bed when he had to leave Waterdeep. It’s not that he can’t sleep anywhere else, it just takes him a while to get used to new surfaces. ALSO, Gale most definitely talks in his sleep. Has he ever set something on fire in his sleep? He would never admit it, but he also can’t say no.    

Wyll. Since being cast out by his father Wyll quickly got used to not having a regular bed. He’d either be camping or he’d be offered shelter for his heroic deeds by the people who he helped. He probably enjoys camping quite a bit, finding the quietness of nature relaxing. Either that or he’s too much of an optimist to admit to himself that he misses having a warm bed. Wyll is also most definitely a morning person. Early bird gets the worm and all that. In fact he gets restless if has to laze around in bed for too long. Lastly, sleeping after he gets his horns is, if not a struggle, then at least something that takes some getting used to. For instance, he can’t lie down without a pillow. Not on his back. Not his side. Not his stomach. So pillows are a must, or at least just something that takes the strain off his head/neck while lying down.    

Karlach is probably the most restless sleeper of the gang. Not in the sense that she doesn’t sleep well—because she does—but she is a very animated sleeper, either kicking or punching the air, or she gets those weird twitches while dreaming. So unfortunately she’s not just a bad bed partner because of her body temperature, which sucks because she loves spooning before falling asleep. So, she’s either cradling Clive or her blanket for comfort. She also prefers sleeping in cold environments, which was fine when the group hadn’t reached Baldur’s Gate because when you’re outside then there’s always a draft. However the Elfsong doesn’t offer that same luxury, but at least she gets to sleep next to the window.

Halsin can also pretty much sleep anywhere, not because it’s practical, but because he’s always comfortable, at least when out in the wild. After all, the perk of bear form is that you’re well-padded for any surface. And he is a heavy sleeper. Give this man a good hearty meal, and he’ll sleep for 12 hours. This also means that any bed partner of his should be careful that they don’t get smothered under him, because if he is in deep sleep then you cannot wake him. He has also most definitely talked himself to sleep when telling his children goodnight stories before bed, only to then wake up and find that he’s the one that's been tucked into bed.

(If you’re interested in more bed thoughts then I also have this post)

#my own personal trash #text #headcanons #baldur's gate 3 headcanons #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #Lae'zel #Shadowheart #Astarion #Gale Dekarios #Wyll Ravengard #Karlach #Halsin #And with that a good night and goodnight to you all #my writing

[silverwhittlingknife]

snippet

“Nobody is going to die here,” Dick says, trying to project a confidence he doesn’t feel.

If this were the Titans, he’d probably get some acknowledgement.  Titans together.  A clap on the shoulder.  Something.  But it’s not the Titans, so instead Cass Cain flicks a glance at him and then goes back to scowling at the wall, and Jason says, “Would you fucking quit it with the inspirational speeches, leader-boy?” and Tim says, “I think we should prioritize getting Dick out,” as if Dick isn’t even here.

“I’m fine,” Dick says.  Because he is. Mostly.  It’s not like it’s exactly fun to get whipped and then tied to an ominous black altar in a room with no obvious doors after successfully talking a cult into deciding you’re the optimum sacrifice of their four captives.  But it’s certainly better than the alternative scenario in which the Dark Leader Whatsisface had listened to Tim’s pitch.

“Weakness in the wall,” Cass says.  “…Here.”

“Yeah, weak walls would be great, if we had C4,” Jason says.  “Except for the part where we don’t have C4, because somebody took my stash and my helmet.  Some fucking insufferable team of fucking idiots who like to mind everybody else’s business—”

“Kick, maybe,” Cass says to Tim, who’s still trying to pick the lock on one of Dick’s manacles.

Tim frowns.  “I don’t think even you can kick a wall hard enough to—”

“Not… the wall.  Kick him,” Cass says, nodding at Jason.

“Oh fuck you very much,” Jason says, with more heat than Dick expects.  Jason’s edgy, beneath all the bluffing, and it’s hard to tell why, because although the situation admittedly isn’t great the countdown timer still has half an hour to go before the cult starts punching whatever buttons outside the room that will set Dick on fire—or get him eaten by a dragon, it hadn’t been very clear through the chanting.

Anyway.  They have time, even if Cass’s shoulders are tense and Tim’s face is strained and Dick’s back is killing him—they strapped him with his back down after the beating, and he’s trying not to think about the likelihood of blood stains on this altar thing—and the sweat from the heat is getting in his eyes.

A hand.  Tim’s wiped the sweat away, which is both a comfort and kind of humiliating.  Tim’s lips are pinched—he’s furious at Dick, it’s obvious, only not acting on it because they’re in front of Jason and Tim, at least, understands the importance of presenting a united front.  So it’ll be a fight, once they get out, but Dick’s not sorry.  If he’s totally honest, he’s a little angry himself.  Trust me, Tim had muttered, when they all first got grabbed, and then he’d raised his voice and asked to speak privately to the leader, and Dick only realized too late what he’d been after, when the cultists came back and explained how Red Robin was going to be their sacrifice to the dragon-god and everyone else could live and watch in order to marvel at their lord’s demonic glory or whatever.

“Cass, listen,” Tim says.  "I think if you help me with the manacles—”

“No,” Cass says.  Tim’s been trying to get her to come back to the altar to mess with Dick’s bindings; Cass has been ignoring him.  A splinter in an otherwise seamless partnership.

"If you put pressure on the other side while I pick the lock," Tim says.

"No," Cass snaps. Cass doesn’t believe in united fronts, Jason or no Jason—Dick should know, she once threw him into a wall—but Dick doesn’t think she’s actually mad at Tim, just impatient.  “Manacles broken, not broken… doesn’t matter. No good if we’re still here.  Need to get out.  Then Nightwing.”

“I vote we leave him here, actually,” Jason says.  

“Jason, shut up,” Tim says.

“What, is this suddenly not a democracy? Do I not have the right to an opinion? Are you against voting, Replacement?”

#dick you're lying to yourself it would've been even worse with the titans #my fic #i have no idea where this is going i just had it in my head and needed to get it out #dick grayson #tim drake #cassandra cain #jason todd

[aphroditelovesu]

Um, hello there. I just wanted to ask, can you write yandere headcanons of House Lannister? I just read that you can, but if not then I’m sorry and you can skip it anyway. But if you can then it’ll be wonderful

2nd request: ''Hi, umm… I know that you’re probably busy with requests and asks, but um can you write Yandere platonic Lannisters with the Reader? If you can of course'' - send by Anon.

"Hear Me Roar." — House Lannister.

❝ 🦁— lady l: I'm sorry for the delay but I think you're used to it, right? Lol, I really apologize. These last few months have been absolute madness and my grandfather is sick, my father too and everything is out of control. Anyway, I hope you like these headcanons!

❝tw: obsessive and possessive behavior, mention of death by fire, threats and implied murder.

❝🦁pairing: yandere platonic!house lannister x gender neutral!reader.

None of this was planned or thought through. Just happened. Your introduction to House Lannister just…happened. Some would say you were lucky, others that you were cursed to have to deal with this family, but none of that really mattered. It didn't matter because you're with them and they won't let you.

Contrary to what many people think, your family was already close in the right measure to the Lannisters, your family was from a House Vassal of the Lannisters so you already had a connection, but it wasn't really strong or similar to what it became in the next few years. Your mother was a close friend of Joanna's and both of them shared the pregnancy, you grew up alongside the twins and that was something that solidified the bond between the three of you.

You, Cersei and Jamie were inseparable. Though Tywin was initially apprehensive about this relationship, Joanna eased her husband's concerns by demonstrating how much she adored you too. It was quite common to see the three of you playing together at Casterly Rock for everyone's amusement. The three of you were never apart, and Cersei sulked when she was forced to say goodbye to you. She hated it.

Tywin was never really close to you, it wasn't because he had anything against you or anything, he was just distant. But that all changed when tragedy struck your family and you were forced to flee to the protection of the Lannisters. Your parents had apparently insulted the Mad King and, as a form of punishment, he had given orders to burn your family. You were the only one to survive because you were protected by Tywin and Joanna. They were your family now. Whether you want to or not.

Cersei was over the moon when she heard you were her sibiling now. And Jamie couldn't be happier to finally have you with them, really with them. Joanna didn't mind, she was happy and she really adored you and was quick to refer to you as hers, Tywin tried to be rational and the voice of reason saying you'd just stay with them until everything worked out, but nothing would work out, not after he became as obsessed with you as the rest of your family.

Joanna was a loving and very kind mother, she absolutely adored you and spoiled you in spades. You were allowed to do whatever you wanted and get away with no punishment. She tried to fight her growing obsession, she really tried out of consideration for her late friend but when you called her ''mother'' for the first time, there was no going back. You were hers from that moment on. She loves spending time with you, reading or doing whatever you like.

Tywin was an authoritative figure and that has never changed over the years, he has only the best for you in mind and that's why he is so strict, but he has a soft side that shows only to his wife and you. He tries to be as tough as his wife doesn't even try, but he will always give in to you. Especially if you look at him with tears in your eyes, his heart melts right there and he does what you ask on the spot. Just like Joanna, you can get away with whatever you do because to him you could never do wrong. You were perfect, and anyone who dared to disagree would find it no good to cross Tywin Lannister.

Jamie is the quietest of his family, he is the understanding brother with your feelings and is always there to protect and take care of you. He is the most protective of his family and he is very suspicious of anyone who tries to get too close to you. He will get into fights for you, feeling proud and triumphant when he gets your support during a fight. Jamie adores you so much, you're the closest thing to an understanding brother he's ever had and he'd be damned if he let anyone take you away. You were a Lannister and always would be.

Cersei is the most possessive and greedy of her family, she will do anything to get your attention and will fly into a rage if she doesn't get it. She hates sharing you with anyone other than her and her twin brother. Cersei might even see you as she sees Jamie, as an extension of herself and not really a person. Like a possession. Something that belongs to her and she's not the type to share. She loves spending time with you, talking, gossiping or just enjoying your company.

The whole family was happy, everyone adored you and you adored them. Everything was perfect. Tywin and Joanna were your loving parents and Cersei and Jamie your mischievous and clingy siblings. Everything was perfect like it's never been before. Until Joanna got pregnant again. Everyone was happy about her pregnancy, including you who were longing for a younger sibling. Cersei wasn't really happy about it all, seeing as you seemed to spend more time with mom than with her because of the pregnancy. Jamie had no problem with that, not like her sister, and just enjoyed this period of Joanna's life.

When the day of delivery finally came, it was difficult and painful, you were there the whole time and you saw Joanna Lannister die. Your mother. It was as if your world had collapsed, not just yours, but Tywin and the twins' as well. You welcomed with joy Tyrion, but your father and sibilings did not. They rejected him, treating him like nothing and blaming him for Joanna's death. During the long period of mourning, you were the only company Tywin sought out. You tried to comfort him and seek solace for yourself, you were the only one to witness the Lord of Casterly Rock's vulnerability.

You were Tyrion's only constant companion as he grew up, constantly despised by his family and those around him for being a dwarf, he clung to you more and more. You were the only person who really cared for him, the one who convinced Tywin and Cersei to act with a modicum of decency around Tyrion, at least while you're around.

Tyrion is the most abrasive of his family regarding his obsession with you, he knows very well that his feelings are wrong, to say the least, but he tries to control as much as he can, although he can't help but be so attached to you. He craves your attention and approval as he grows up and even as an adult that hasn't changed. He wants your approval, if he can't get it from his father then he wants his. He is very kind to you, but he is still a Lannister, and may the Seven have mercy on anyone who dares to harm you, for Tyrion would be sure to ruin them utterly.

All Lannisters are obsessed with you in their own way and have their own infighting, Tywin and Cersei want to keep you away from Tyrion as they are sure Tyrion will be your undoing, Jamie is happy to see that you care too about your brother and he makes sure you spend your days with him and Tyrion, much to the chagrin of your father and sister. They all fight each other and wouldn't mind killing each other to have you. But everything changes when there is a threat against you and they all quickly join together to get rid of that threat quickly and painfully. May the Seven forbid anything to happen to you, for you can be sure the whole family would go wild and most likely blame each other.

There are rumors that Tywin supported Robert Baratheon because of a personal revenge, some say it was because of what the Mad King did for your dead family, others say it's because Rhaegar insulted him. Rhaegar insulted him by wanting to take you as his spouse instead of Cersei, and Tywin could not allow that. He would not allow his beloved child to be taken from him. And Cersei agreed with that completely, she didn't want you to marry and leave her, Jamie didn't seem to mind too much but he doesn't like the idea of being taken away from you, as long as you were happy he would be fine. Tyrion is the most selfless and says that if you ever want to marry, he will support you, as long as it is someone he has highly valued. You are a Lannister and therefore you must have only the best and your family will ensure that. They promise you.

#yandere game of thrones #yandere got #yandere house lannister #yandere house lannister x reader #yandere platonic house lannister x reader #yandere tywin lannister #yandere joanna lannister #yandere cersei lannister #yandere jamie lannister #yandere tyrion lannister #yandere headcanons #platonic yandere #a song of ice and fire #yandere asoiaf #asoiaf

[hqbaby]

eight — sorry, my bad

fuck ur instincts — suna x reader & atsumu x reader

you and suna are just fooling around—so why does he care so much when you start falling in love with someone else?

previous — masterlist — next

word count. 1.3k content. swearing, sexual conversations, short sex scene with vaginal penetration

“Ouch,” Hinata says, stopping behind Atsumu. “Man, that must hurt.”

The blond looks over his shoulder, shirt in hand. “What’re ya talkin’ ‘bout?”

They’re in the locker room, getting showered and dressed after a day of long and gruesome training. It wouldn’t have been so bad if Bokuto hadn’t shown up late and drunk, causing his team to lose the scrimmage and pissing Sakusa off. There was a bit of a squabble after that, but they managed to get it together in time for the next match.

“He’s talkin’ ‘bout yer back,” Aran snickers. “Rough night?”

Atsumu squints, trying to understand what they mean by that. Then it hits him. “Oh,” he says, eyes growing wide. “That.”

Yaku comes up behind him to see what the other boys are talking about. “Holy shit! Y/N did that?”

A few lockers over, Suna freezes at the sound of your name.

“Hey!” Oikawa’s piercing voice cuts through everyone's chatter as he marches his way over to the other setter. “Quit talking about my best friend with these jerks.”

“I’m not!” Atsumu throws his hands up innocently. “Blame Hinata. He’s the one that pointed it out.”

The other boy pulls a face as Oikawa turns to look at him with a fire in his eyes. “I was just worried about Atsumu!” he insists, backing away slightly. “I mean, come on. Look at what she did to him!”

Your best friend scowls but looks at Atsumu anyway. He stops in his tracks when he sees it—sees them, all his previous anger washed away. Oh fuck, he thinks. The poor guy.

“Atsumu, I am so so so so so so sorry,” he says, ignoring the freaked out look the other boy has on his face at Oikawa’s sudden change in demeanor. “She’s a demon, I’m telling you. Satan’s spawn. I’ve been telling her mother since we were twelve that her real daughter must’ve been kidnapped and replaced by a monster because…”

Suna sees the marks on Atsumu’s back. Clearly yours. He knows because he’s been blessed with the same ones on several occasions and teased by his teammates about them to no end. Of course they never knew they were yours. No one knew.

He looks straight ahead at the open locker in front of him, quietly putting on his shirt and taking his bag out.

This shouldn’t bother him. It doesn’t, he tells himself. It really doesn’t. You’ve slept with other guys before, he knows that. You’re allowed to. It’s not like he can stop you. It doesn’t matter, none of it does, not when you come back to him at the end of the day. Not when he gets to hold you long after those other guys are gone. Not when you always choose him.

He slams his locker shut and pops his earbuds in, waving at the boys who say goodbye to him as he leaves.

That’s probably why you were busy last night. Why you didn’t read his message as soon as he sent it, like you usually do. Why you texted him back with a slew of apologies at 1 AM. It was all because, last night, you chose Atsumu instead of him.

Of course you did.

He feels pathetic. What did he expect was going to happen when you started seeing one of his best friends? Atsumu doesn’t hide you the way he does. He deserves more from you than Suna ever will.

He pulls his phone out and shoots a text. 

Fuck, he really hates himself right now.

“Explain.”

You perk up at the sound of Kaori’s voice, smiling as she approaches you on the bench. “Explain what?” you ask sweetly. “Love your hair today, by the way.”

She narrows her eyes at you. “Yeah, yeah. Cut the crap.” She gestures at the three marks on your neck, there are two small ones that you would've gotten away with if not for the giant one beside them. “What are those?”

You keep smiling. “Curling iron, curling iron, allergic reaction,” you say, pointing at each one as you assign their causes. “Sucks to be me, I know.”

“Y/N.”

“Kaori, I love you.”

She groans. “What happened to ‘no marks’?”

“Well, this was the first time with this guy,” you say sheepishly. “Didn’t exactly tell him the rules.”

“First time?” Kaori raises a brow. “Was it…”

“Yeah…”

“Oh fuck!” she exclaims. “Okay! What the fuck? And you didn’t tell us?”

“I’m telling you now, aren’t I?”

Yukie comes up to the two of you, drawn into the conversation by your screaming. “What is it?” she asks. “What’s going on?”

“She slept with Atsumu!”

“What? And you didn’t tell us?”

You pout and put your face in your hands. “Oh my god, could you be any louder?” you say. There are a few other girls in the room, but it’s not like they don’t know about you and Atsumu at this point. And you know more about their sex lives than you probably should anyway, so it all evens out. But still.

“Dude,” Kaori says, kneeling down in front of you and forcing you to look at her. She opens her hands in front of her and makes her palms face each other, holding them an inch apart. “Tell me when to stop,” she tells you, slowly moving her hands away from one another. She pauses when they’re four inches apart. “Bigger?”

You nod, feeling your face heat up as she continues moving her hands. She stops again. You wince. “Bigger.” With wide eyes, she increases the distance between her hands until you say, “Stop.”

“No way.”

“Yes way.”

Yukie gapes, staring at just how far apart your other friend’s hands are. “What the fuck.”

Kaori drops her hands and bows down in front of you, Yukie following suit. “You’re my new god, Y/N,” she says. “Fucking beast, I’m telling you.”

You roll your eyes and grab their arms. “Get up,” you say as the two of them resist you. “I’ll make you do laps if you don’t. I’m serious.” They know you're (probably) not serious but they get up anyway, sitting down on the bench beside you. Sometimes, you’re happy to be captain. Power is one hell of a drug.

“Was he good?” Yukie asks. “Like on a scale of one to ten.”

“Eight?”

“You’re lying.”

“I don’t know!” you throw your hands up in defeat. “He’s just… nice. And, I don’t know, I think I’m starting to like him a little.”

“No way! You have a crush on the guy you fucked?” Kaori asks sarcastically. “It’s like that’s totally never happened before!”

You frown. “Rin doesn’t count.”

“Oh, baby,” she says, smirking, “he always counts.”

Suna throws his head back, hips thrusting uncontrollably as he feels his orgasm creep up on him. His breath is ragged as his whole body starts to tense up. He can feel it, he’s so close.

“Fuck! I’m right there!”

“Come for me, Rin!”

“Feel so good, so good. I’m coming! Fuck! Y/N!”

He cum spills out into the condom as his whole body freezes. His eyes shift down to the girl beneath him who looks up with an awkward smile on her face. He’s such an asshole.

“It’s Ayame,” she says meekly as he slips out of her. She sits up with her legs pulled to her chest.

He takes the condom off and knots it before tossing it into the trash. He stays on the edge of the bed, back turned to the girl. “Right. Ayame,” he murmurs, “sorry.”

“It’s alright,” she tells him and he knows she probably means it. She’s one of those girls who would do anything for him. It’s why he texted her in the first place. He knew she’d say yes to whatever he asked for. “It’s Y/N L/N, right? I mean, she’s really pretty. Everyone wants her.”

A dry chuckle. “They do, don’t they?” he says quietly. He glances back at the girl and shrugs. “Sorry,” he says again. “My bad.”

notes. this was honestly one of my favorite chapters to write in the whole series 😩 like we have some atsumu and reader silliness with their friends AND suna angst??? all the things i love writing <3

if you haven’t seen the results of the poll from last chapter, you can find them here!! totally not what i expected but ykw i’m not complaining

#hqbaby.fyi #hqbaby #haikyuu #suna rintarou #suna #suna rintarou x reader #suna x reader #miya atsumu #atsumu #miya atsumu x reader #atsumu x reader #haikyuu x reader #suna rintarou fic #suna fic #miya atsumu fic #atsumu fic #haikyuu fic

[ripleyresonance]

Bathroom Stall

Ex-girlfriend Rhea x Reader

You signed staring at the time on your phone. It was 1:30 am and you were standing by a wall with loud music blasting around you. Your friends knew you were not a club person and yet they dragged you out here anyway. They promised that they would go home at midnight but as one friend had her tongue down a random guy's mouth and her other friend grinding on the dance floor with her girlfriend you knew it would be a lonnnnng night. So there you were quite drunk and drinking another AMF against the wall.

You had not always hated the club. In fact, you used to be like your friend in the corner grinding on her girlfriend back when you and Rhea were still together. You two were always the hot couple. Going out to parties, drinking, and making everyone else jealous. But all good things must come to an end. Rhea was home less and less for work and you were lonely babysitting the dogs. You told Rhea you couldn't take it anymore and you left. 

You thought about your decision frequently, was it right to leave and be lonely by yourself or be lonely in a relationship? You raised your cup to take a sip at an attempt to forget until a rather muscular body bumped into you causing your drink to spill all over your chest in your low-cut top. 

“Oh my god, I am so sorry love let me-” a familiar Australian accent spoke. 

Both of your eyes went wide as they met each other. 

It was like time froze as you looked into her eyes. It felt like no time had passed since you last saw her. Between all the yelling and the crying, you can remember those warm eyes looking into yours just like they were now. 

“What the hell are you doing here?” you said in a tone of disbelief. 

“Do you own this club or something, why should you care.” She spat back leaving an uncomfortable silence between you too. 

“I’m just going to go,” Rhea said coldly turning away before you grabbed her arm. 

“Wait-” Your arm instinctively reached out grabbing her very toned biceps.

She raised an eyebrow as you took in her outfit SHe was wearing your favorite black top. It tied around her neck and showed off her very toned back. There were many nights where it ended up on your floor. As well as the black skinny jeans that she was wearing slightly showing off her V line that you had kissed many times. 

“I just…I wanted to talk to you.” You said hopefully the liquid courage would help you. 

“About what? Packing up while I was away? Or breaking up with me over text so I had to go find you at your friend's apartment.” She said looking hurt. 

It is true you were not proud of how you ended things. You just couldn't see this look on her face…the hurt you caused. 

“I-I'm sorry.” You slurred. 

“It was…super not cool of me how I dipped but I just…I was so lonely Rhea. All those nights in bed watching you on the screen when all I wanted was to feel you next to me..and under me…and on top of me.” You giggled. 

Rhea rolled her eyes realizing you were drunk 

“Let's get you some water.” She said as you whined. 

“I'm serious Rhea I miss your lips…your hands….your mouth.” You sighed feeling heat pool between your legs as Rhea blushed. 

“Yeah well, maybe it's a little too late for sorry.” Rhea tried to stay strong as you pushed up against her. 

“But baby you know how good I am at saying sorry in so many ways.” You smiled batting your eyelashes up at her as she bit her lip. 

“Shit, you know how I get when you look at me like that..” Rhea whispered looking down at you. 

“It's been so long I think I forgot…care to remind me..mami.” You smirked as you saw the fire light behind Rhea's eyes. You saw her scan the room probably looking for her friends.

“Oh fuck it,” Rhea mumbled grabbing the back of your neck and pulling you in for a sloppy kiss. 

You were jealous of the few people who got to witness this kiss because it felt like months of tension releasing. You wrapped your arms around her neck trying to deepen the kiss just wanting to take in all of her at one time. You nearly lost it when she grabbed your ass. You needed her now and she needed you too. She broke up the kiss grabbing your hand and dragging you to the bathroom. 

As she pulled you into the stall you thanked god your friends picked one of the nicer bars or else your bathroom sex fantasies would have been abruptly put on hold. 

Rhea backed you into the stall door grabbed your knee and bent it at waist level to fit her knee in between your legs making you gasp at the friction on your heat. 

“God you haven't changed at all huh? Still, a dirty slut who is ready to get on her knees for me anywhere…” She said bumping her knee into you….” anytime.” She said bumping a bit harder making you let out a small moan. 

She quickly puts one hand over your mouth and leans into a whisper. 

“You make any sound and I stop,” Rhea said before kissing your neck. You nodded feverishly as she kissed down to your breast. 

“God I’ve missed these perfect tits.” She damn near growled as she took a nipple into her mouth. You threw your head back against the door trying your best to stay silent as Rhea massaged your breast. Feeling her calloused hands on you again was enough to make you cum but as she moved her fingers further south you closed your eyes as she reached your core. 

She moved her hand under the band of your skirt quickly as she spread your lips smirking at you. 

“What a mess you made sweetheart. I don't think I have to get my fingers anymore wet but you know the thing I like.” She said raising two fingers to your lips as you eagerly opened your mouth suckling them in. 

You stared into her eyes and took them as deep as she she pushed her fingers only tapping her arm when you gagged as she let you come up for air. 

“You still do it so good for me, isn't that right baby.” You said nodding feverishly. She traced the the two fingers down your body right to where you needed them to be before stopping. 

“Beg for it,” Rhea said looking into your eyes. 

“I thought I couldn't make a sound.” You giggled as she put a hand around your throat. 

“Keep being a smartass and I’ll stop right here and leave without even touching your clit.” She said with dark eyes making your eyes roll back. 

“Please…” You whispered as you felt her dragging her hand up your thigh. 

“Please what.” Rhea smiled inching closer and closer to your clit. 

“Please…fuck me like you missed me.” You whined causing that dark look in her eye to come back as she pressed against your clit. 

It took everything in you not to be a moaning mess as she began rubbing strong but small circles on your clit making you try and get in your tip toes as she pulled your hips down with one hand. 

“Your going to take it like a good fucking girl for mami aren’t you slut.” She said slowly pushing two fingers in your entrance as you gasped. 

You tried to be quiet as she started pumping her fingers into you and curling them up to hit the spot that only she could reach. Tears started to fill your eyes as you got closer and closer to the edge. 

“You going to cum for me pretty thing?” Rhea teased as you whispered what seemed like a hundred small yeses as you inched closer and closer to orgasm. Rhea added her thumb as she started rubbing your clit to the same rhythm as you bucked your hips. “Fuck fuck Rhea im-” You said your voice getting higher right on the edge as she stopped abruptly. 

“What the fuck!” You groaned in frustration as Rhea put your leg down. “Not so much fun when you're the one getting left huh?” Rhea smirked at you.

“Hey wait that’s no…” You watched as she sucked the two fingers she had inside you closing her eyes at the taste the sight almost making you orgasm. 

“You really have to work on your patience love.. See like if you are patient in the car ride back to my place… maybe ill make you cum there.” She winked pressing past you to leave the stall. You quickly fixed your skirt following her out of the club. 

You caught one of your friends' eyes as you went to leave and shrugged. It was just one of those drunken nights.

#mami rhea #rhea ripley x reader #wlw #rhea ripley #wwe raw #wwe

[quoththemaiden]

I hope everyone enjoyed the finale of @mrghostrat's Big Name Feelings Good Omens AU as much as I did. While ghostrat ended his story perfectly with a beautiful and realistic close to the part of their relationship we as an audience get to see, I had one more scene idea close to my heart and so I'm putting it out here because my heart still sings with love for this story and its characters.

These fanscenes now also appear on AO3. Along with the four I've already posted here (1, 2, 3, and 5), you can find a scene I kept off Tumblr ("Ch. 12"). You can read the final scene ("Ch. 17") below, but you can also find it on AO3, where it shows the text messages in graphical form.

Bilv, thank you once again for creating such an amazing story! I'm happy to say that my mind is no longer filled with your middle-aged men and their middle-aged-man problems. Instead, please enjoy these 3k words of pure fluff.

—

Crowley dumped his bag on the hotel room floor and did a lazy spin to take in the space. "Not bad, eh?"

"It's very posh," Newt agreed, setting his bag down more gingerly. "You're sure we can't pitch in for it?"

"I'm not dealing with you setting your phone on fire trying to do a transfer." Crowley waved the offer off and flopped onto the couch. The hotel suite had two small bedrooms plus a nice little sitting area that would be perfect for board games. It was set up to mainly accommodate a family with kids, albeit a family that could afford to splash on a multi-room suite for the family vacation to Spain. Crowley stretched out, shamelessly taking up the whole couch in a bid to ease the stiffness in his hips. "Tell ya what, if you're feeling guilty, you can buy my drinks tonight."

Anathema laughed and gave Crowley a poke in the side, looking quite satisfied at his jerk and yelp. "Knowing you, that will end up being a fair deal. And I'll take care of renting the wheelbarrow to cart you back here."

Crowley rubbed his side dourly. "Maybe I preferred you on the other side of the ocean."

Anathema grinned at him, unrepentant. "If you want to stay at my place while I'm here, I'll lend you my keys." She ducked a thrown pillow with a laugh.

—

The weather was perfect for sipping cocktails outside, and their mutual agreement to all try drinks they'd never had before helped keep the night from slipping away from them too quickly. Being able to chat without the artificial framing of a webcam was a delight, too, but all of them were too continuously connected to be interested in a strict phones-down policy.

Anathema rolled her eyes and took another sip of her drink before answering the text that had just popped up on her screen.

Aziraphale: Are you certain he doesn't know I'm nearby? Anathema: I didn't tell him, Newt doesn't know, and he doesn't have a magical angel-detecting sense does he? Aziraphale: I'm not so sure about that last point. Some of his last texts seem awfully pointed. Anathema: You're being paranoid

Anathema slipped her phone away before leaning over to look at Crowley's phone screen, where he was lining up a very artistic shot of his drink, showcasing as much of the swanky beachfront seating area as possible. She blinked at him slowly. "Have you been sending Aziraphale 'wish you were here' texts?"

Crowley glanced at her sideways, his thumb paused over the shutter button. "Maybe."

Anathema sighed and rubbed her forehead. "Are you an adult who can handle a vacation with friends or are you going to pine after your boyfriend all night?"

"I'm here, aren't I? It's not like we're tied together at the hip."

Anathema shook her head in fond exasperation. "Getting these printed on postcards for him would be funnier than this text spam." Crowley barked out a laugh and sent Aziraphale his next promise to take him here sometime anyway.

Anathema pulled out her phone again, tapping out a quick message.

Anathema: He says he's a full-grown adult who can handle being away from you.

There was a pause before Aziraphale responded to her — probably due to dealing with a barrage of messages from Crowley.

Aziraphale: A very convincing claim.

Anathema looked up as Crowley put his phone away. "All done?"

"Yeah, he's taking an early night." Crowley took a languid sip from his drink.

"How have his workshops been going?" Newt asked, fiddling with a vibrant russet cocktail in a type of glass he couldn't name.

"Good!" Crowley's eyes lit up with excitement, his cheeks pink. "We polished his presentation before he left—"

"I heard about that!" Newt cut in. "He said it was more like beta-testing than beta-reading."

Crowley snorted. "If you want to see what happens when someone goes against the script, I'm your guy."

"The reception's been okay?" Anathema asked. "I know getting audience participation at workshops can be pulling teeth."

"Nahhh, it's different in the library world. Those weirdos actually care about their jobs."

"So do I, but it would be pulling teeth to get me to do a 'group active learning exercise.'"

"Fair." Crowley grinned. "They know how to talk like humans, then. And they really are interested in anyone with tips on how to break into digital spaces in an authentic way."

Newt hummed thoughtfully. "He's really okay with talking about his online presence at work like that? I'd be way too embarrassed."

"Nah, you stop caring about that stuff when you get older."

Anathema snorted. "I'm still saying it's pure luck you didn't chase him offline again with that con nonsense."

"Pfffft." Crowley made a sound that was all plosives and no vowels. "Never even close."

"Right," Anathema replied with tasteful sarcasm.

Crowley cut her teasing short by slapping a yellow canvas pouch down on the table. "C'mon. Let's play a game!"

"Oh, Bananagrams!" Anathema accepted the diversion and unzipped the banana-shaped bag, pouring the Scrabble tiles out between them. She deftly started flipping them letter side down. "I don't think Newt's played?"

Crowley nodded and waggled his fingers at the pile of tiles. "Rules are easy: Everyone's building their own board-free Scrabble grid. You start with 21 tiles. Say 'peel' when you've used yours up to make everyone take another tile from the stock. Say 'dump' to trade one of your tiles for three from the stock. The first person to say 'peel' without enough tiles left for everyone to take one wins. Simple, right?"

Newt nodded slowly, watching as Anathema divided the tiles out neatly. "So they're putting Scrabble in bananas these days."

—

Aziraphale: Is he up yet?

Crowley gestured Anathema towards the table where their phones sat in a cuddly pile of charging pads and wires. "You got a message while you were in the shower. From Aziraphale?"

Anathema kept her face carefully schooled as she sauntered over and picked up her phone, using the need to adjust her towel turban as an excuse for not making eye contact. "Mm." She picked it up and read the incriminating message, then snorted. "Bracing himself for when your wall of texts will start, I imagine."

"Nahhh, he loves it!" Crowley snagged the glasses cleaner out of his bag and sauntered into the bathroom. He'd be wearing them all day and he'd murder someone if he had to deal with the scummy film left by hotel soap.

"Whatever you say, lover boy." Anathema breathed a tired sigh.

Anathema: Yeah, and he saw this. We should be at the conservatory by 11

She should have just taken the phone into the bathroom with her, steam be damned.

—

The botanical conservatory was, frankly, gorgeous. The greenhouses were so large the ceilings weren't even noticeable, and the outdoor gardens were a riot of native plants. Crowley devoured the signs about plants he was unfamiliar with with gusto, and pointed out those he recognized with the enthusiasm of a man determined to prove he wasn't hungover. Newt listened with unfeigned interest, while Anathema wasn't shy about slowing them down to take photos of particularly artfully arranged displays.

They'd been there about half an hour when a patter of English broke through the background chatter of Spanish. "Could you spot me the entrance fee for the butterfly room?"

"Aziraphale!" Crowley immediately spun to his right, his whole face lighting up in delight before realizing that seeing him here was, in fact, quite odd. "What are you doing in Spain?"

"I left right after my last workshop. I thought it might make a nice surprise."

"It made the best surprise." Crowley pulled him into an ardent kiss that went on long enough for Anathema to cough something about public displays of affection. Crowley eventually relented on the kiss, as much for the sake of their breathing as anything else, but kept his arm slung firmly around Aziraphale's shoulders. "You're a bit of a bastard, you know that? I could've been looking forward to this the whole time."

"Only as much of a bastard as you deserve," Aziraphale teased right back with easy familiarity. His heart kept pounding hard anyway.

"Heh. What a way to butter me up while you're angling for a free ticket." Crowley snuck another kiss onto Aziraphale's cheek. Aziraphale laughed as he slipped his arm through Crowley's, relishing the contact after their weeks apart.

The butterfly room, when they got in, was a riot of fluttering wings. The promise of iridescence was enough to get Crowley to remove his sunglasses, and a quiet compliment on his eyes from Aziraphale was enough to get him tucking them into his pocket instead of putting them right back on afterwards.

They left the butterfly room — with some careful mutual inspections to make sure no one was harboring a stowaway, involving perhaps a bit more care in running fingers through another's hair than was strictly necessary for the task — and emerged near the exit to the rose garden. Crowley's hand moved towards his sunglasses but Aziraphale put his hand on his arm. "Just a couple more minutes? There's something I want you to see first." Aziraphale glanced over at Anathema, who nodded slightly but otherwise kept her expression carefully uninterested.

Crowley looked between them and shrugged. "Not exactly subtle as far as hangover tests go, but a'ight." Aziraphale laughed breathlessly and kept a firm grip on his arm, drawing him deeper into the garden.

The rose garden featured small offshoots to the main path where groups could sit for a little while to rest. It wasn't until the third one that they came upon an alcove that was empty, and Aziraphale promptly pulled Crowley aside, Anathema holding out her hand to keep Newt just outside it with her.

"Crowley—" Aziraphale began, his breath catching in his throat as he caught Crowley's full attention. "I, ah. I actually came here because there was something I wanted to say."

Crowley's hand twitched reflexively towards his glasses again, but this time he kept it down himself, even as his heart started to pound. "...yeah?"

"Yeah," Aziraphale breathed out as he sank to one knee, reaching into his pocket. His fingers were trembling, and his smile was nervous but so very adoring. "If I ask you something, will you promise to laugh?"

"—huh?" Crowley blinked in confusion, then stared as Aziraphale opened a jewelry box to reveal a simple ring.

"Anthony J. Crowley, would you be my snouse?"

It took a few seconds for Crowley to register any of the words Aziraphale had just said, but then he barked out a laugh as the last one hit him. "Really? That's how you ask?"

"You don't like it?"

"I just... I thought if you did it, you'd do a whole speech for it. You even brought us out to a rose garden!"

"I'll be honest, I had one of those planned. I just... couldn't quite seem to bring it to mind." Aziraphale had no idea how he was managing to talk even as much as he was around the tightness in his throat. "You haven't answered my question, dear."

"Pfft..." Crowley closed both his hands around Aziraphale's. "Yes. Yes, of course I'll be your... your whatever. Forever and always."

"Thank goodness." Aziraphale half rose and was instead greeted by Crowley also kneeling, both of them moving together for a kiss that was slow and deliberate. Aziraphale could feel the pounding of his own pulse against the tight hold Crowley had on his hands, and he could tell how Crowley's heartrate had risen to match his by the way their kiss kept shifting for quick intakes of air. Aziraphale finally broke the contact only so he could gently extricate his hands from Crowley's. It took every scrap of concentration he could scrape together to find Crowley's left hand and slip the ring onto his finger. "...it fit okay?"

"Nggh," Crowley replied before pulling him into another kiss.

They might have stayed there all day if Anathema hadn't cleared her throat — snapping another quick photo as they looked up at her, flushed and frazzled. "We are still in public, I'm afraid."

"Yeah," Crowley breathed.

"Huh..." Aziraphale added, just as coherently.

Newt shook his head at the unlikely prospect of them getting up anytime soon, and looked over at Anathema instead. "How were you so prepared?"

Anathema flashed him a smile. "I knew this was coming. Aziraphale asked me to take the photos."

"Is that why you're here?"

"It was the other way around," Anathema replied. "Aziraphale realized he could arrange his schedule to join our trip partway, and we worked out how to take advantage of the situation."

"Bastard," Crowley muttered in response to nothing and everything, pressing tender kisses to Aziraphale's left ring finger like he could imprint a ring there with his lips. "Did you measure my finger while I slept?"

Aziraphale smiled as he watched him, his heartrate finally settling closer to normal under Crowley's reassuring touches. "It's scarcely my fault you're so easy to send to sleep, dearest."

"You're ridiculous. Adorable. Incorrigible."

"Are those all synonyms in your mind?" Aziraphale leaned in to steal another kiss.

Crowley laughed breathlessly at how easily they'd returned to comfortable teasing and carefully pushed himself up. He tugged his clothing straighter and tried to pretend he was put-together as he glanced at Anathema, who was grinning unabashedly at them. "I'll want those pics for... for everything. All of them."

Aziraphale put his hand on Crowley's arm for support as he straightened his own creaking knees. "I'm claiming Tumblr first, if you don't mind."

"Eh—" Crowley gave him his full attention again, not that it had strayed for more than a moment. "This will really get you notice, Angel."

"Good." Aziraphale took Crowley's hand and leaned in to kiss him. He rubbed his fingertip over the ring settled firmly onto a finger that had never borne one before. "Let them know who's claimed you."

Crowley snaked his arm around Aziraphale's neck, chasing down another kiss that went on long enough to have Anathema clucking behind them. "We're gonna get kicked out of the garden, Angel."

Aziraphale smiled against Crowley's lips. "Let them. The one we made is better."

—

Three bottles of wine sat open and mostly-drunk on the table, divided between four glasses that were using the remnants of the previous night's game of The Quiet Year as a coaster. ("We set it in an idyllic countryside and it all went downhill from there," Crowley had explained when Aziraphale came in and started examining the hand-drawn map. "I think the arrival of the dog was the real turning point to madness," Newt had chimed in. "It was doomed from the start," Anathema declared with a resigned sigh.) The red rings of wine stains could have added as much to the group narrative as anything they'd purposefully drawn.

"I came in like a wrecking ball~! I never hit so hard in love~!" Newt sang raucously, a broad grin on his face while Anathema laughed into her hand. Aziraphale tilted his head as he watched them, visibly processing the music.

"All the other kids with their pumped-up kicks, you better run—!" Anathema joined in as the tune jauntily transitioned to a new melody. Aziraphale's face froze into an expression of fond but intense confusion.

"Problem, Angel?" Crowley drawled, utterly amused as he watched the tableau.

"I'm fairly certain that isn't how those songs go. And isn't that polka?"

"Never heard of Weird Al? Bit bigger overseas, I s'pose." He gestured to Anathema's phone, which was supplying the impromptu karaoke party.

Aziraphale nodded, confusion dissolving and leaving just a hint of distaste in its place. "And a different generation, I suppose." He took another sip of his wine, a nice Syrah, as the melody shifted to a new and equally abrasive polka.

"I wear your granddad's clothes," the millennials continued singing, until one of them glanced at Aziraphale and started laughing and the other followed suit, wineglass held out in an attempt to insulate it from deep belly laughs. Crowley snagged it deftly and set it on the table, another drop of wine rolling down to stain the paper there. Aziraphale rolled his eyes, much more amused at their drunken good humor than offended.

Crowley patted Aziraphale's thigh. "Want to take the rest of that Syrah back to my room and leave the loverbirds to it?"

"It would still be rather noisy if we stayed here," Aziraphale replied with a tempting smile. "Why don't you come back to mine?"

Crowley leaned forward eagerly, only a fraction away from jumping up at the unexpected invitation. "Oh?"

"Well, the room may not wind up being quite as nice as the one you got, but I thought for our first night together as a formally promised couple..." Aziraphale's smile said everything.

"You're a genius." Crowley kissed his cheek and grabbed Aziraphale's hand to pull him up with him, then firmly refused to let it go despite the challenge of tucking a wine bottle under his arm while juggling a wine glass and his phone.

Aziraphale laughed. "We can take two trips, since you'll want your bag. Did you leave it packed?"

"Like always." Crowley grinned. "Not going to rib on me for that ever again, huh?"

"One occasion of convenience is not worth the wrinkles, my dear," Aziraphale responded with all the primness he could muster around a wide grin.

Crowley laughed and took the opportunity of Aziraphale opening the hotel room door to crowd closer and steal an eager kiss that was just as eagerly given. "You really managed to hold in that you'd gotten us a room all day?"

"I kept the trip secret from you too, didn't I?"

"Age will not wither," Crowley chuckled and nipped Aziraphale's ear. "C'mon, let's see that room. Coming back for pyjamas optional."

The two of them left the hotel suite hand-in-hand, with everything they truly needed already right there with them.

#good omens #good omens fanfiction #bnf au #ineffable husbands #fanfiction of fanfiction #my writing #middle-aged men and their middle-aged-man joy

[its-time-to-write]

i know now it’ll pass - ch. 2

Note: slight allusion of SA all i do is think about the past

You did consider calling out sick, but it’s Friday and you can just stare at your screen for eight hours and then sleep for two straight days.

You’re making the trek from your car to the office and you’re absolutely positive you look like hell. Sure, your hair and makeup is done, but there’s no masking the exhaustion in your bones. You drag yourself through the door and past everyone else headed to their various workstations, including Roy and a confused Jamie.

“Oi, porch girl, what’re you doing here?” Jamie asks. Roy smacks him on the back of the head.

“She fucking works here, you twat.”

You don’t point out that you’ve literally run into him twice, and maybe count it a blessing that he doesn’t remember you. Instead, you nod wearily and head to your desk.

It’s a fairly easygoing day, and you decide to take a late lunch. You’re halfway through your meal, absorbed in chewing each bite thoroughly and not falling asleep, when you hear someone call your name from the doorway. You look up to see Jamie standing and fiddling with his shirt.

“Do you even talk?” he asks, no preamble. 

“What?” you say, confused. You realize you actually haven’t said much to him in any of your interactions other than “sorry.”

“Oh,” you reply, “yeah, I do. I’m just tired, is all. Neurons aren’t firing at full capacity and all that.”

Jamie nods. “Just wanted make sure you were all right. Got your name from one of the blokes across the hall, cuz we can’t keep calling you ‘porch girl.’ Anyway, are you?”

You half-laugh. “Yeah, can’t you tell? I’m obviously doing great.”

Jamie’s face morphs from concern to slight offence.

“Oh god, I’m sorry,” you hasten to continue. “I haven’t slept well all week, and it’s made me snippy. I wasn’t- it’s not about you. I just can’t quite think straight.”

Jamie nods again. “Right,” he says, “don’t think that’s healthy. Coach is always on me for rest days. Maybe you need one too.”

You shrug. “I mean, that probably works for you because you’re on a footballer’s salary. I don’t really have time for personal days aside from the weekend. There’s stuff to be done and bills to pay, so…” you trail off as you realize you’ve spoken unfiltered again.

“Anyway,” you say, fake smile plastered on your face, “thanks for checking in. See you around.”

Jamie takes his cue and leaves.

—

Why did you think you’d be able to sleep better on the weekend? You don’t know. Girls’ night is officially a no-go, so you’re trying to wear yourself out with some yoga. Sometimes physical exertion helps, but you can barely think straight enough to get in the correct positions. You’re going to cry again, and probably have to call your doctor because this can’t be normal. You just wish your brain would shut up long enough for you to rest. 

You drag yourself out of bed and to the kitchen for a cup of tea. At least you’ll get to see a gorgeous sunrise.

—

You’re not positive when you fell asleep, but you did. You had a dream of someone’s strong arms around you carrying you from the steps to your bed. The dream lingers as you slowly blink your eyes open and realize that you actually are in your bed.

How did you get here? You know for an absolute fact that you are not a sleepwalker, nor did you wake up in between passing out in your front yard and now. You didn’t get yourself here, so who did?

The flat is quiet, and light is peeking in through the curtains. You check your phone to see if maybe one of your friends had helped you inside, but there’s no text letting you know. You frown. Maybe you’re just going insane.

You roll out of bed and grab your robe, then stop in front of your door. There’s a sticky note right at eye-level that says, don’t freak out, I’m in your kitchen. - Jamie (from work)

Oh shit.

You frantically run your fingers through your hair then fly down the stairs to find Jamie on his back on your couch, scrolling through his phone.

He looks up and says, “Wotcher,” completely unfazed. He swings his legs onto the floor and sits up.

“Let me explain,” he says as you gape at him. “I was on a run without Roy, and saw you asleep on your steps. Figured you’d want to be left alone after last time. But then I came by later on me way back and saw your door was cracked open. So I helped you upstairs and then stayed here with the door locked so no fuckin’ creeps would come in. You really should lock your door,” he continues, “Never know what sort are lurking ‘round.”

You’re still staring at him, uncomprehending. Jamie frowns. “Shit, didn’t mean to overstep. Just- you didn’t look so good and I thought it’d be better for you to sleep. And we’re not like, fucking strangers are we? Shit, I’m sorry.”

That snaps you out of it. “No!” you reply. “No, we’re not strangers. And it wasn’t… weird. It wasn’t weird. It’s just nice, which is why I was having trouble responding. I mean sure, this is the longest we’ve ever talked without me tripping over air, but you’re not- I mean, I don’t feel unsafe around you. You’re not that type of person.”

Jamie’s phone is away and his hands are tangled in his shirt. You wonder if it’s a nervous response.

“I’ll get out of your hair,” he says after a pause. “Maybe go back to sleep, yeah?”

You nod. “You want a cuppa before you go?”

Jamie hesitates, which is different from the flat-out no you expected. Finally he says, “Nah, should probably get going. Don’t want me hanging ‘round longer than needed, innit?”

You’re not really sure how to respond to that, but Jamie doesn’t give you a chance to before he’s down the front steps and out the gate.

Damn it.

—

The not-dream of Jamie’s arms carrying you to bed is much more comforting than the dreams you usually have. The ones where you’re suffocating under a blanket and everything is cold and slimy and you’re screaming and screaming, but no one takes notice. 

You wonder if it can actually be classified as a dream, or if it’s more of a memory?

Anyway, it doesn’t matter because you push it down. No sense in thinking about it in the daylight when it’s sure to haunt you at night.

—

It’s embarrassing to see Jamie at Nelson Road, so you avoid him if you can. He certainly knows who you are now, and the few times you have accidentally made eye contact have been painful. Each time, he’s looked at you with the same completely indiscernible gaze, the one that makes your face heat up and slip out of whatever room your in. You successfully avoid conversations for four days, but he finds his way to your office on Friday.

“You good?” he says as he walks in without knocking and sits unceremoniously in the chair opposite you.

“Yes..?” you reply, unsure why he’s even here. You don’t forget that he’s Jamie Tartt, star striker and really should have no interest in you, like at all.

“Cool,” he says, still sitting sideways in the chair. You wonder if he’s capable of sitting normally. 

You stare at each other in silence for a moment before you say, “Not trying to be rude, but why are you here?”

Jamie scrunches up his face. “Wanted to know why you were avoiding me and to apologize for it. Whatever it was, I didn’t fucking mean it.”

Oh.

“Oh,” you say aloud, “no, you didn’t do anything. It’s me. All of our interactions have been supremely embarrassing, so I figured if we don’t talk, I can’t get embarrassed.”

Jamie nods in understanding. “That’s proper shit,” he says.

You never know how to respond to half the things this boy says, so you just settle on, “Ok,” then go back to typing.

“You got any allergies?” Jamie’s voice breaks the silence again and startles you into a typo. You delete it and look up at him.

“No?” you reply, confused. 

Jamie laughs. “Why’d you say it like a question? You unsure if you’re fucking allergic to something?”

For a moment you think he’s taking the piss, but there’s genuine amusement in his eyes as you shrug. 

“I don’t know, it’s just how I talk. Why do you want to know if I have any allergies?”

Jamie rummages in one of his jacket pockets and plops a box down on your desk. “Mum said this is the best tea for insomnia. Figured out you can’t fucking sleep so I called her and asked. She used to make it when I was a lad and bouncing off the walls, like. Thought it might help.”

This is the second time Jamie has done something just plain nice for you, and it’s freaking you out a little bit. It feels… uneven. Wrong, maybe.

“How much was it?” you ask in an attempt to settle the score. “I have cash in a drawer.”

Jamie scrunches his face again. “You don’t fucking owe me for this shit,” he says. “Ted’s always on us about ‘doing things we want done without fucking hoping some shit in return.’ Only he didn’t say ‘fuck,’ or ‘shit.’”

You’ve seen Ted. You know how he is.

“Well, thanks,” you reply. “It means a lot. I’ll try it and let you know.”

Jamie grins, a great beaming smile that warms you from your chest all the way to your fingertips.

“Mint,” he says before bounding out the door.

—

The tea actually helped. Or maybe it was just the fact that someone was thinking about you, doing something without expecting a favor in return. Whatever the case, you don’t end up on the porch. Sure, your sleep is still jacked up, but not as much as before. It’s restless, but it’s a sleep void of dreams.

—

You report back to Jamie the next day, and he takes it like a personal challenge. A mission of sorts. He’s in your office every other day with some remedy or the other, all for the sake of helping you sleep.

One day it’s, “Dani said if you put these plants under your pillow, you’ll sleep like you’re dead.”

“They’re herbs, Jamie.”

Or, “Richard has this oil thingy from France and he says you’ll sleep like a baby.”

You bite your tongue to keep from pointing out that babies don’t sleep well.

Or another time, “Coach said if you burned this in like a bowl or some shit it’ll cleanse your aura I guess? His girlfriend uses it, I think it smells fucking nasty.”

You both shudder. Coach Beard is nice, but his girlfriend certainly is a character.

You try everything and report back the next day. Jamie has taken to asking you to stick your head into the locker room so that the team can hear each verdict. They still don’t really know who you are, but they’re invested in this challenge. They’re sweet, and it’s funny to start your day with their cheers of success or groans of disappointment. You think the best was when Richard made a comment about certain aerobic exercise that might tire you out and Jamie had a murderous look on his face. You’re not sure what the look means, but you did bring it up ever-so casually at the next girls’ night.

“He thinks you’re hot, babe,” says Jessica once the squeals have died down.

“No way,” you reply. “Impossible.”

Evelyn shakes her head. “I have to agree with Jess on this one. He’s into you.”

Your protests are lost amid another round of giggles, and you let yourself believe them for a single moment before quenching that stupid little spark that’s beginning to burn brighter in your chest.

Table of Contents

#jamie tartt x reader #jamie tartt fanfiction #jamie tartt imagine #jamie tartt x y/n #jamie tartt x you #jamie tartt #ted lasso

[bedsyandco]

Blue was captivated by the sight of Jack spinning Rosie around on her little skates. Her cute little giggles echoing all around them. She hasn't seen her daughter this excited since she took her to Disneyland last summer.

"He's so good with kids, they all are. It just makes your ovaries explode doesn't it?" Violet asks from next to her and she smiles

"It does,"

She had met Luke's girlfriend a few times in passing before but she had really gotten to know her a lot better in the last few days that she was there. Rosie had taken quite the liking to Violet and that was enough for Blue to like her too.

"You're flying back to Michigan on Monday right?" Blue asks when she sees Violet stare at the youngest Hughes with what could only be described as a look of pure love mixed with a bit of longing.

"Yeah. I would stay longer but I can't afford to miss more classes than I'm already going to," Violet says

"The distance must be hard on you guys," Blue says sympathetically and Violet swallows roughly before nodding

"It is. Before he moved to Jersey we'd never gone more than two weeks before seeing each other, now it's months at a time sometimes. Long distance is probably one of the hardest things I've ever done. In a way our relationship is always gonna be a little long distance with hockey you know, but he's worth it," Violet says and Blue doesn't think she's ever seen a person look at someone with as much love in their gaze as Violet is staring at Luke right now. Maybe only when Jack is looking- she cuts that thought oof abruptly, not ready for what it might mean.

"Anyway lighter topic, I'm so excited to see the Jonas brothers perform. Do you have a favourite?" Violet asks and Blue laughs at how she wiggles her eyebrows suggestively.

"Nick," Blue admits bashfully and Violet hits her arm in excitment

"Mine too. He's so hot," Violet says

"Who's hot baby?" Luke asks, appearing out of nowhere and wrapping his arms around Violet's waist from behind, dropping a peck to her cheek.

"You are," she replies, sending Blue a wink and the couple makes their way to the other end of the ice, leaving Blue to herself for a few minutes, but not long after she sees Jack approaching her.

"Where's Rosie?" is the first thing she asks when he comes to a stop in front of her

"With my parents," Jack says and nods his head in the direction where his parents were skating, Rosie in between them, a hand holding each of hers

Jack puts his hands on her waist, pulling her into him and skating them backwards. It feels like they haven't gotten a lot of alone time the last few days, and he missed his girl.

"You having fun?" Jack asks, standing still again and gently brushing a strand of hair away from her eyes.

"I am," she answers but Jack narrows his eyes

"Wanna try again?" Jack teases and Blue sighs

"I am having fun. I'm just...a little overwhelmed," Blue admits softly and Jack gently cups her cheek, rubbing his thumb back and forth

"I understand. I know there's a lot of attention on me, you, us. I already told everyone that Rosie was off limits and that if there's even one photo posted of the back of her head, someone's getting fired," Jack says and Blue smiles at the venom in his voice

"What?" Jack asks and Blue just shakes her head fondly, putting her arms around his neck, and his loop around her back

"Nothing, I just...I love you Jack," she says and Jack grins, connecting their lips in a kiss

"I love you more baby. Now what's this I'm hearing about Nick being your favourite Jonas brother? It should be Joe no?" Jack says and Blue frowns

"How do you reckon?"

"Well is Kevin is the oldest and he's Quinn, and Joe is the middle child, that would be me, and Nick is the youngest so that would be Luke," Jack says and Blue bites her lip to stop from laughing

"I think you're over-analyzing it honey," Blue says, patting his chest twice and Jack pouts as she laughs and skates away.

#❥ — ꒰ blue + jack ꒱

[maxinemaxmayfield]

sink your teeth before i disappear explicit | 4k | steddie | 18+ only

steddie, pre-relationship, established ronance, panic attacks, flashbacks, virgin!eddie, sharing a bed, cuddling & snuggling, interrupted masturbation, mutual masturbation, hand jobs, biting, marking

“I’ve never really slept with anyone before,” Eddie admits quietly, not sure if Steve is even still awake. Steve turns around awkwardly, trying to keep Eddie’s arm wrapped around his waist as he rolls over to face him. “Like… sex, or just actually sleeping next to someone?” OR Sharing a room leads to sharing a bed leads to sharing... more

[read on ao3] read on tumblr below

WEDNESDAY

“So they would rather you sleep in a bed with Nancy? ” Steve asks in disbelief as he stacks the returns. 

Robin rolls her eyes at him. “Duh. They don’t know I’m of the, uh, lavender persuasion,” she reminds him, lowering her voice with a quick scan of the store.

It’s fairly quiet, especially for a rainy Wednesday during summer break. Just a couple of teens milling about through the stacks, trying to decide on a movie. 

“And I’m pretty sure they still think I’m secretly dating you… though they have finally learned to stop asking.”

Robin’s parents had managed to secure a modest cabin by the lake for the long weekend. Steve could never quite get it straight – Robin’s mom’s brother’s wife… or was it her cousin’s husband? Nevertheless, someone who was somehow related to Robin had a cabin they weren’t using, and rather than leave it sitting empty, they had invited her parents to use it. Robin had agreed to go if she could bring a friend or two… which quickly turned into three, because she just couldn’t take Nancy and Steve and leave Eddie all alone for the weekend. And they were all thick as thieves after what happened during spring break. 

“Anyway, I thought you’d be happy to be sharing with Eddie,” Robin says, tossing Steve a meaningful look. God, he regrets telling her about his ill-advised crush.

Come Thursday evening, they pack into two cars and drive up to Lake Michigan, looking forward to spending their days swimming and their nights around the fire. 

– – –

THURSDAY

The cabin isn’t anything fancy – a simple wooden structure tucked between the trees – but it’s right on the lake, has its own small dock hosting a tiny row boat that looks like three passengers would probably capsize it. 

Robin shows them around the cabin, pointing out her and Nancy’s room, her parents’ room, and finally, tucked back in the corner behind the kitchen, Steve and Eddie’s room. 

Their room is the only one with separate twin beds. Steve isn’t sure if he’s relieved or disappointed. 

Everyone leaves to get settled in their own rooms, and Steve stands there with his old sports bag in hand, shifting from one foot to the other. 

“So, uh, which bed do you want?” he asks. 

Eddie throws himself down on top of the bed furthest from the door, pressing the back of his hand to his forehead. “This one – you can protect me from any evil entities of the night.”

“Unless they come in through the window,” Steve points out, setting his things down on the bed nearest the door. 

“Well, shit,” Eddie groans, eyes darting between the window and Steve. “Don’t fucking say that!” 

Steve laughs and throws himself onto his own bed, propping himself up on one elbow. 

“So, Harrington, do you snore? Tell me now, so I can prepare myself," Eddie says.

“Nah, but I do sleep in the nude.” 

Eddie’s smile falters and Steve can’t help but smirk. He doesn’t offer up any more information, letting Eddie dwell on whether or not he was joking. 

“I, uh, I sleepwalk, sometimes,” Eddie tells him, and then falls silent, dropping back onto the bed and staring at the ceiling like he might find a script there. 

“Should make for an interesting night,” Steve says, trying not to laugh when Eddie’s eyes flick over to him before going back to the ceiling. “C’mon, let’s go see if they need help with dinner,” Steve says, pushing himself off the mattress and holding out a hand to help Eddie up. 

It’s still raining after dinner, so they sit around the little fireplace, playing board games and listening to music until it’s time to turn in for the night. 

Steve stands next to his bed for a moment, looking down at the pajamas he’d packed. He glances up, but Eddie’s busying himself with removing his rings one by one and setting them down on the nightstand. 

Steve strips out of his shorts and t-shirt, hesitating at the edge of his boxers, wondering if it’s worth it for the bit. Eddie’s back is to him. He makes his decision, leaving them on and climbing into bed, arranging the covers to hide his boxers but show as much skin as possible elsewhere. 

Just to mess with him. 

When Eddie turns back, he lets out something between a yelp and a squeak.

Steve pulls back the blanket with a flourish, watching Eddie’s eyes go wide and then narrow when he realizes what’s underneath. 

“You dick.”

“I mean, I usually would sleep naked, but I thought I’d be modest for the sake of my temporary roommate,” Steve says, raising an eyebrow. 

Eddie climbs into his own bed, burrowing under the blankets. “Well, don’t change your habits on my account.” 

Steve chuckles and turns off his bedside lamp. “I’ll keep that in mind. ‘Night, Eds.” 

“Night.”

– – –

FRIDAY

Luckily, the rain has cleared up by Friday morning, the sun peaking out from behind the clouds and warming their skin. 

After breakfast, they don their swimsuits and head out to the edge of the lake. Nancy and Robin drag out a deck chair and curl up side-by-side, while Steve walks out onto the dock, turning around just before he reaches the end. 

“You coming for a swim?” he calls to Eddie, arms spread wide and displaying the expanse of his chest. 

Eddie plops himself down on a towel next to Nancy and Robin. “Are you kidding? The water’s freezing.”  

“Whatever, you big chicken!” And with that, he turns around and dives, cutting through the surface of the calm water. 

Eddie sits back and watches the gleam of Steve’s back as he slices through the water with ease, years of swimming making him more graceful in water than on land. It’s mesmerizing. 

“You might wanna pick your jaw up off the ground,” Robin quips, looking at him over the frame of her sunglasses. “Once you’re done ogling, I mean.”

Eddie huffs, shaking his head. “What? No! I’m not – Steve’s just–”

Nancy leans around Robin to fix him with a dubious look. “Oh please, don’t even deny it.”

“This is bullying. You’re bullying me,” Eddie accuses, crossing his arms over his chest. “Two against one isn’t a fair fight.” 

He doesn’t hear what Nancy says next, because there’s a disturbance out in the water. Steve has stopped swimming smoothly and seems to be thrashing, struggling against something they can’t see, trying to get back to shore.

Eddie’s throat closes up with panic. 

He jumps to his feet, shouts out and points, and Robin and Nancy are on his heels as they run out to the end of the dock. 

Just like that fateful night on Lover’s Lake, Nancy doesn’t hesitate. She jumps in and swims towards Steve, methodically, uniform strokes spurring her forward. She reaches him quickly and pulls him the rest of the way to the shore.

He’s sputtering and shaking, on all fours as he reaches the grassy edge of the lake, and Robin’s right there beside him, wrapping him in a towel, pushing his hair back out of his eyes, speaking to him in soft, calm, hushed tones. 

Eddie stands to the side, heart racing, chest tight. He feels useless, a spare part, unsure whether to come closer or give them space. All he can do is watch helplessly, a cruel parallel of when Steve was pulled through Watergate. Flight or freeze, never fight. 

Coward. 

Robin is placing Steve’s hands flat on the earth, helping him ground himself, still babbling away about where he is and what is going on around him. Eddie is in awe of how she always knows what Steve needs in these moments. 

“The vines… grabbed me,” Steve mumbles, breathing fast and shallow. Robin drapes herself against his back, contrasting with deep and slow breaths, pressing a hand to his chest. 

“Steve, we’re at Lake Michigan. No gate here, we’re not even in Hawkins,” Robin reminds him again, patience of a saint. “We’re safe, we’re safe, I promise you, we’re safe. It was just a plant.” 

“Nancy –”

“– pulled you out of the water, she’s right here,” Robin says, pointing her out. 

“And Eddie –”

“– is also right here, he’s fine. You’re fine. We’re all fine.” Robin turns to Nancy and Eddie. “Can you help me get him up? I’ll take him inside, give him something warm and something sugary, it should help with the shakiness. And then he’ll probably need to sleep for a while when he comes down from this.”

Eddie swoops in to support one side of Steve and the three of them hoist him to his feet, leaving the lake behind them. 

Steve’s voice drifts through the darkness later that night. “Hey, Eds, you awake?” 

“Yeah.”

“I can’t sleep.”

“Me neither.”

There’s silence for a while, not awkward, but comfortable. Until Steve breaks it. 

“Can I… would it be alright if I laid in your bed for a bit?” 

Eddie nods before he realizes Steve can’t see him. “Yeah, of course.”

There’s a rustle, footsteps, and then the mattress next to him dips as Steve slides under the blankets. Heat radiates off his chest.

It’s a small bed, so they don’t have much choice for positions. Eddie ends up curled around Steve’s back, an arm thrown around his waist to stop himself from rolling off the edge. 

“This is nice,” Steve whispers, wrapping his fingers around Eddie’s wrist and pulling him tighter around him. Steve takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly before speaking again. “Is it weird if I say I was kind of hoping we’d have to share a bed this weekend? I just… I hate sleeping alone.” 

Eddie chews on his bottom lip for a moment. “Don’t you usually sleep alone?”

“Yeah.” 

Steve doesn’t expand on his answer, doesn’t offer anything more. They lie there pressed together, letting their breath synchronize. 

“I’ve never really slept with anyone before,” Eddie admits quietly, not sure if Steve is even still awake. 

Steve turns around awkwardly, trying to keep Eddie’s arm wrapped around his waist as he rolls over to face him. “Like… sex, or just actually sleeping next to someone?” 

Both, but he feels a bit stupid admitting the first one to Steve Harrington, renowned lady’s man. He’s heard enough rumors to know the guy gets around. And, well, Eddie isn’t exactly spoiled for choice in Hawkins, Indiana. 

“I mean, I've had sleepovers and shit, slept next to people but… never, I dunno, cuddled?” The last part comes out as a question, like he isn’t sure if that is actually what they’re doing. 

Steve moves closer then, right up in Eddie’s face, tucking his own arm around Eddie’s waist. “And do you like it? Cuddling?”

Eddie’s not sure if it’s embarrassment or the body heat coming from Steve that makes his face feel so warm. “I, uh, I think so.”

“Well, maybe you need a bit more experience to make sure,” Steve says, mischief in his voice. And with that, he rolls onto his back, pulling Eddie with him so he face-plants right onto Steve’s bare chest. Two solid arms come up to wrap around him, one landing between his shoulder blades and the other settling in the dip of his lower back. Steve buries his face in Eddie’s curls and hums. 

Eddie shuffles a bit, turning his head to un-squish his nose from Steve’s pec. The hand between his shoulder blades moves up to card through his hair, fingertips pressing deliciously into his scalp and sending tingles all the way down to his toes. 

Eddie’s head is spinning, overwhelmed by the smell and feel and sound of Steve all around him. He yearns for all of this to mean something, but he’s seen Steve with Robin – how close they get, how easy it is for Steve to throw an arm around her and pull her in for a hug, press a kiss to the top of her head or tip of her nose, how they cuddle up on the couch when they watch a movie. And they make sure everyone knows that it’s strictly platonic. So why would this be anything different? 

He can enjoy it for tonight, though, so he burrows back down into the hair on Steve’s chest, tracing the line of muscle underneath with his finger. He feels Steve shiver and shift, run his hand back down Eddie’s neck and trace over each vertebrae of his spine through his thin t-shirt, getting slower and slower until his hand slips from Eddie’s back completely, coming to rest on the mattress behind him as his chest rises and falls, even and slow, dozing off.

Eddie presses soft, barely-there kisses to the skin beneath his lips for what feels like hours until his eyes droop and he, too, drifts into sleep. 

When he wakes, Steve is gone and he can hear the shower on. He grabs the pillow that still smells like Steve and buries his face in it, pretending it’s only to help ease the crick in his neck.

– – –

SATURDAY

“I don’t know what else to do, Robin!” Steve whines, exasperated. “If I get any more forward with my flirting, I’ll just be straight up asking him to blow me.”

Robin wrinkles her nose at him before going back to applying sunscreen to her legs. “Why don’t you just ask him out, like a normal person?” 

“I don’t know how to do that with guys, Robs, much less one who’s my friend!” 

It’s true, he knows how to hit on girls he barely knows, asks the odd guy in a gay bar to go out back with him. But Eddie? It’s different.

“Why are you being so difficult? Go inside right now and say, ‘Eddie Munson, would you like to go on a date with me?’ That’s it!” Robin hisses. 

Steve flops down onto the wooden dock, squinting up at the sun. “This coming from the girl who took three months to ask out Nancy Wheeler.”

Another voice drifts over, drawing nearer. “Yeah, but at least she actually fucking did it.” Steve turns his head to the side and shields his eyes, watching Nancy sit down next to Robin and dangle her toes into the water. “Steve Harrington, stop being a big baby and just go ask him.”

He sticks his tongue out at the both of them and reaches down, cupping some water in his hand before flinging it towards the girls, spraying them with the cold water of the lake. 

- - -

At first, Eddie can’t figure out what woke him. He takes stock of his body - he doesn’t need a piss, he’s not too hot or cold, he doesn’t think he had a nightmare. So he turns his attention to the room, and that’s when he hears it. 

It’s too familiar of a noise for him not to figure it out immediately, especially when paired with heavy breaths coming from the other side of the room. 

Oh. 

He cracks open an eye, and the room’s washed in cool, dim light from the moon outside the window. He can just make out the outline of Steve, lying on his back, hand moving rhythmically under the covers. His head’s dropped back, mouth open slightly, neck stretched out like it’s begging to be bitten. 

Eddie feels arousal rush through him and he squeezes his eyes shut again, trying not to move or draw attention to himself. He doesn’t want to make this any weirder than it already is. 

But he can’t stop himself from hearing it.

There’s a sharp inhale, followed by a string of little ‘ah-ah-ah’ sounds, and then – 

Eddie must be dreaming, or hallucinating, or maybe he died in the Upside Down and this is his eternal torture, because he swears it, there’s no mistaking it – a long groan followed by “Eddie.”

He can’t help but peek over, sees Steve grab a handful of tissues from his nightstand and clean himself up, tuck himself back into his boxers and roll over, facing the opposite wall. 

Eddie’s ears are burning, his mind on a loop, playing those sounds and Eddie, Eddie, Eddie over and over again. 

He wants to scream, wants to sing, wants to go jump in the lake, wants to run back to Hakwins, wants to climb into Steve’s bed and grind against him. Shit, there’s a thought. 

He adjusts his pajamas, hoping Steve doesn’t hear the creaky springs. He wills himself to calm down, but his dick has other ideas, aching for relief. 

Eddie glances over at Steve’s bed again. He’s quiet now, breathing slow and probably sleeping. And hey, if Steve did it, why can’t Eddie? Fair’s fair and all that. 

Slowly, carefully, he rolls onto his left side and reaches his right hand down the front of his pants. Fuck, he’s so hard and he can still hear Steve’s voice ringing in his ear. His breathing is shaky and he keeps glancing back to check that Steve’s still not moving. 

But Eddie’s never been good at staying quiet, muttered swears spilling from his lips as his breath comes quicker. He manages to swallow Steve’s name, biting his lips together and exhaling sharply through his nose. 

“Eddie?”

He freezes. This isn’t the chorus of whispered Eddies in his head… this is a question, and it’s real.

Steve’s awake.  

He debates not even answering, just pretending to be asleep, but then he hears the other bed creak and Steve’s feet hit the floor, like he’s about to cross the room and check on him. So he turns his head. 

“Yeah?”

Steve’s sitting on his bed facing Eddie, both feet on the floor like he was about to stand. “Were you… touching yourself?” 

“No, I –,” Eddie starts to lie, but it sounds weak even to his own ears. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be.”

Eddie doesn’t know what to say to that, what it even means. Steve reaches for the lamp and switches it on. If he looked good in the cool light of the moon, he looks incredible in the warm wash from the lightbulb. 

“You can keep going. If you want,” Steve offers. His tongue darts out to wet his bottom lip and Eddie wants to feel it sweep across his teeth.

He doesn’t take his eyes off Steve as he rolls over and takes himself in hand once more, looking for any sign that Steve was kidding or pulling some kind of sick prank. But all Steve does is watch him back, eyes darting down to Eddie’s hand moving under the sheets.

“You – can you move the covers?” Steve asks, his voice pitched slightly higher than Eddie’s used to hearing. 

Eddie tries to push them down with his free hand, kicking with his feet to pull them down past his hips, but they just tangle and twist instead. And then Steve’s standing, crossing the short space between them and reaching out for the sheets. 

“Can I–?” 

Eddie nods, and Steve slides his fingers under the edge of the blanket. Steve’s knuckles brush against Eddie’s stomach and he can’t help but shiver at the sensation, thinking of where else he’d like Steve to touch him. 

The night air is cool after the heat that had built under the covers, and Steve kneels at the foot of the bed, still watching like he’s mesmerized. Eddie slows his movements, props himself up on one elbow. 

“Steve.”

Steve’s eyes snap up to his, pupils blown and mouth slack. 

“Just – fuck – c’mere,” Eddie whines, and Steve doesn’t hesitate. He darts forward, hovering over Eddie’s body, one hand cradling the side of Eddie’s head. 

Eddie surges up, kisses him hard and messy, and Steve dips down to meet him. Eddie feels a hand close over his own, tightening the grip and urging him on faster. 

“Jesus Christ, Eddie,” Steve pants against his lips, and Eddie thinks that his name in Steve’s mouth is the prettiest sound in the entire world.

Eddie can’t stop his hips from bucking up into both of their fists, desperate and aching. “Fuck, fuck, Steve… bite my neck?”

“What?”

“Bite my neck,” he repeats, dropping his head to the side to get his point across. 

Steve ducks down, licks and sucks and grazes his teeth along the sensitive skin there, but he doesn’t bite. And Eddie’s getting close. 

“You can… you can actually bite, like, with teeth,” Eddie manages, and that seems to do it, because the next thing he knows, he feels Steve’s teeth sink into the flesh of his neck, just beneath his ear, and his tongue sweeps over to soothe the marks no doubt left behind. 

Eddie slings his free arm around the back of Steve’s neck, holding him there, letting him nip and lave in turn until Eddie’s gripping the sheets and biting back a shout as he comes over both of their hands. 

“Shit,” Eddie breathes into Steve’s hair, arms drooping over the edge of the bed like wilted flowers. “Holy shit.”

“Shit,” Steve agrees. “You okay?”

“Fucking fantastic, actually. You?”

Steve laughs softly. “Pretty damn good. Sorry for waking you.”

“Oh, you are wholeheartedly forgiven,” Eddie says. Not that he was mad about it in the first place, but Steve doesn’t need to know that. 

“I’ll just, uh…” Steve stands and makes a move towards his own bed. Eddie catches his wrist. 

“You don’t like sleeping alone, right?” 

Steve shakes his head. 

“So sleep here. With me.”

– – –

SUNDAY

When Eddie wakes up, the sun is shining through the window, brightening the room. The sounds of voices and dishes drift in from the kitchen, along with the smell of bacon. His stomach grumbles. 

Eddie tosses on the first some-what clean clothes he can find, gathers his mess of frizzy curls up in a bun and heads out the door, ready to eat a frankly disgusting amount of breakfast. 

Robin’s parents are just rinsing their plates when he arrives, getting an early start out on a hike up the edge of the lake apparently. He slides into one of their vacated seats, grabs a plate and loads it with pancakes and bacon before dousing the whole lot in syrup. 

It isn’t until he shoves the first huge bite in his mouth that he realizes Robin and Nancy are staring at him bug-eyed and slack-jawed. 

“What?” he asks, through a mouthful of food. 

They both shake their heads frantically, Robin throwing a look at her parents who are busy discussing whether or not it might rain later. Steve shifts uncomfortably in his seat.

Everything is quiet apart from the sound of Eddie’s fork scraping on the plate and Mr and Mrs Buckley’s voices, until they tell them all they’ll be back in a couple hours and close the door behind them. 

“What the actual hell!”

“Jesus Christ, did you get attacked by a vampire?”

There’s an explosion of shouting from both Robin and Nancy, while Steve doubles over laughing. 

Eddie’s baffled. “Fuck are you talking about?” 

“Dude! Your neck!” Robin says, handing him a large metal spoon. 

He moves it around, trying to get the right angle, and finds a massive, distorted red and purple splotch on his neck. His eyes immediately fly to Steve, who is just managing to get his giggles under control. 

“Hey, man, don’t look at me. It was your idea,” he says, sipping some coffee from his mug. “I was just following orders.”

“Ew,” Robin says, pushing her plate away. “Way to ruin my appetite.”

“Bullshit, Buckley, you were done anyway.”

Eddie raps his knuckles on the wooden tabletop, drawing their attention back to him. “Uh, you’re all acting suspiciously cavalier about this.”

Robin and Nancy glance at each other. “We had a bet going,” Nancy says. “About how long it would be until it happened."

Eddie gapes at them, not even sorry that he still has some half-chewed pancakes in his mouth.

“I am gonna insist you cover that up before my parents get back, though,” Robin says. “I don’t wanna deal with their awkward questions about where you got it.”

“God, I hate you all,” Eddie says, piling more pancakes and bacon onto his plate. 

#steddie #steddie fic #steddie smut #stranger things #steve x eddie #steve harrington x eddie munson #steve harrington #eddie munson #virgin eddie munson #i've been sittin on this one for a long time whoops #my fic

[sardonic-the-writer]

—tangy

SUMMARY | this was supposed to be a simple, relaxing mission. all of that had been thrown out the train window as soon as you saw idiot one and idiot two

PAIRING | tangerine x reader

REQUESTED | no

WARNINGS | spoilers for bullet train, hit men, mentions of murder, guns, ect

WORD COUNT | 1.7k+

AUTHORS NOTE | fell in love with tangerine while watching bullet train. what more is there to it

🍊 MASTERLIST 🍊 NAVIGATION 🍊 RULES 🍊

Confined spaces certainly makes the job easier for you.

You were able to observe everyone simultaneously. Being everywhere all at once. Sitting idily in a corner inconspicuously, sipping on a drink while pretending to read a newspaper. All the while watching as people fidgit with their fingers and mingle amongst nearby passengers. Keeping tabs on who leaves and who enters and how many times they do it.

In fact that's all you had been planning on doing for the next twenty four hours. Enjoying the ambiance of the lovely modern train as you waited for your mark. Probably opting on getting up to lure the target into a bathroom stall, slitting their throat once the lock had been clicked. An easy job by definition, especially for you. Practically a vacation handed to you on a silver platter.

That's why you almost choked on your fizzy drink when they walked in.

You'd never forgot a face. Not once. That's part of the reason you made for such a good hit man. Show you someone's high school picture once, and you'd be able to pick them out in a crowd forty years after it had been taken. And when I say pick them out, I mean with a gun. Preferably from a rooftop. Probably from a rooftop.

So you recognized the leather jacket and blue suit almost immediately. After all how could you forget. Your annoyance for them had been all but solidified in concrete the moment the loud one had shot your leg in Russia, his twin just watching. That cast was a bitch to lug around for half a year, and everytime it thumped against the staricase in your house you cursed the both of them.

Suppressing a groan, your eyes cautiously watched from behind the pages of a comically large larg magazine as Lemon and Tangerine walked down the isle of the train compartment together, facing each other while bickering quite loudly. Or at least doing what you assumed was to be bickering. Knowing them, they probably just used that many curse words in a casual conversation anyway.

"I've told you a thousan' times, bruv." You listed to Lemon slur his words with that thick accent of his, practically spitting fire at his twin. "It's Thomas The Tank Engine. Not Thomas the Train. Get that in ya thick skull."

"Oh well, ex-fucking-scuze me. I didn' know I'd be gettin schooled on a fuckin kids show today, twat." Tangerines eyeroll was all but audible in response. He ignored as fellow passengers swapped offended looks with each other at their language. You'd imagine he'd be flipping them off if he wasn't so busy basically biting his brothers head off.

They were nearly past your booth now and out of the train car, your fingers tightening around the reading material in front of you in anticipation. For a moment you thanked whoever had given the both of them such long legs and speedy strides, happy as long as they were out of sight. Didn't matter that they would still be on the train. As long as they didn't see you, all was well.

So of course they would choose that moment to stop right in front of your fucking seat. The urge to stand up and kick them both in their asses was only increasing. Not that it wasn't already high up there in the first place.

"I don't give a bloody damn when ya smart ass people half the time you bastard. Here me complanin? Nope." Lemon popped the p at the last word, pointing a finger at his companions chest. "But no one, and I mean no one ya cheeky fuck, bad mouths Thomas in front of me."

"Right. And what you gonna do about it, fruit boy. Stick a diesel sticker on me when I ain't lookin?"

"I just might. An don't call me fruit boy. You're the one who came up with those names in the first place 'member?"

Your muscled tensed up in preparation when Tangerine suddenly whipped around to you, dragging Lemons attention along with him. The cool metal of your gun brushed against your fingertips as you slowly reached under the trains table for where it was hidden. Maybe this time you'd have an excuse to shoot them in the legs. Send them a hallmark card in the hospital afterwards. Something cheep and tacky. You were petty like that.

"Hey, mate, mind reminding my buddy here tha' grown ass adults don't watch the cartoon channel and he's due for a visit to the loony bin?"

You just glared at him and his stupid fucking 90's porn stache, frown deepening as you watched recognization well up in his eyes.

"Hang on." Your hand twitched with the urge to rip his tounge out of his mouth as it ran across his bottom lip. "I know you—"

"Oh for fucks sake."

You hopped up, abandoning your cozy little corner in turn for dragging him by the lapel of his now wrinkled suit into the connecting cabin of the train cars. You imagined that if they hadn't been so surprised by an innocent looking samaritan dragging their asses along, you would be sporting two new holes in the side of your head.

"One job! I had one job and the two of you had to muck it all up!" Words hissed out of your mouth like steam from a gas can as you dropped your grip on Tangerine and turned away from him, revealing your own gun nonchalantly. They were both quick to draw their own, stances stiff and confused in contrast to your loose but annoyed one.

"Ay I recognize you now." Lemon looked over at Tangerine, gesturing his gun to you loosely. "Russia. A broken leg. James the train, 'member?"

"Would you stop it with the Thomas the train shit for one fffuckin moment?" He hissed back. "Yeah I remember 'em. But that dosent explain what the hell their doin on this train now does it?"

"Nothing that concerns you." You saved them the trouble of yet another fighting match. "And wait, James the train?"

"Yeah." Lemons eyes brightened slightly while looking at you. As if happy someone was asking him about his interest in the train show without attempting to shit on it. "A James. Impatient but gets shit done. Kinda determined too."

You blinked.

"Okay now I like him." You turned your gun over to Tangerine completely now, the man's eyes widening as he sputtered slightly.

"What?!"

You shrugged with an unbothered and downward turn of your lips. "He complimented me. Plus he wasn't the one who shot me in the leg."

"Come-fucken-on that was not a fucken compliment!!"

"I dunno bruv." Lemon shrugged, mirroring your earlier action. "It kinda was."

"Yeah, alright I definitely like you now."

"Oh come off it you bitch! Help me out here or I'll fuckin kill you before they shoot me!" Tangerine spat. You listened as Lemon snickered.

"Hey. I'm good at readin people wha' can I say. And they certainly aren't lookin to shoot any of us right now. That's not a very Jamss thing of them ta do." You sent Lemon a kind thank you—to which he returned it with a your welcome. Tangerine was left alone to seethe in anger.

"Stop that before you blow a gasket." You made a face, referring to the way Tangerines jaw clenched as if he were attempting to chew glass. "Your brother here, Lemon, is right. I don't really feel like carrying your lifeless body across this train right now. I just want to get my damn job done and then go see a cherry tree grove or something."

He grumbled whilst Lemon preened at your recognization of his correct assumption.

"Besides. I'd hate to shoot you in the face and ruin your best asset. Would really ruin my day more than it already has been." A loose sigh made it past your lips. "Fucking up shit is more your style anyways."

You could tell Tangerine was struggling with being of the receiving end of such a blatant compliment and insult on the same time—practically picking through his brain for a measurable response. Either way he was about to run his mouth, and you'd wasted enough time on the job already.

"If I see either of you pass by through my train car again, it better just be that: passing through. Anything else and I am not afraid to end up leaving a few people with ringing ears. Capishe?" The gun in your hands was nodded at strictly, the not so hidden threat being left out in the open for all to interpret.

"Loud and clear mate." Lemon grinned.

"Good. Now scram."

"Hold on love—"

"Call me love again, and I rip that mustache off and shove it straight up that ass of yours. Now ta-ra, or whatever pricks like you say." You were already leaving, so sadly you didn't get to see the look on Tangerines face as you walked off, really just wanting to finish that drink you'd left behind now. Although you wouldn't complain if you were to find something a bit stronger than soda. Especially after that.

The twins waited until you were out of the connecting room before either of them went to speak.

"You know." Lemon clamped a hand down on Tangerines arm with a toothy grin. "If I didn' know any better bruv, I would say tha' you have a thing for them. Not everyday you get a compliment on your ugly mug."

"Must have hit your head boarding. And get ya fucken greasy bitch ass hand off me." He snarled, swatting his brothers hand off his shoulder. "They just threatened to kill me for fucks sake. And I them!"

"I dunno. They seemed like they're a little partial to oranges themself."

"It's tangerines idiot! Tangerines!"

"Whatever. Don't get your knickers in a twist."

#tangerine x reader #tangerine #bullet train #bullet train x reader #tangerine x you #tangerine x y/n #bullet train x you #bullet train x y/n #fanfic #x reader #one shot #bullet train tangerine #assassin!reader #tangerine fanfiction #bullet train fanfic

[cardinalone-ao3]

November 7 - Work

@hinnymicrofic

A/N: so this ended up being longer than a microfic (~1200 words). Whoops. I’m not sorry.

She was determined. Years of being overlooked - stealing rides on her brothers’ brooms in the quiet night. Learning how to live and love flying again after Tom made her believe she would never amount to anything.

But flying saved her. Healed her. Became a part of her and wove itself into the piece of her soul that Tom tried to take.

And now it was her time. She would prove to everyone that she is a quidditch player, not just a substitute. Someone who deserves it. Someone who earns it.

Suppressing a groan from the soreness building in her legs, she climbed through the portrait hole. It was dark, and had been dark for some time now. So it was a surprise that the Common Room wasn't totally empty.

She smirked as she observed him alone in the room, sitting on the sofa facing the fireplace. His head was draped over the back of the sofa, his glasses askew on the bridge of his nose, soft snores emitting from his mouth.

Her eyes snagged on his mouth and she resisted the old urge to think about what it would be like to snog him. It was a silly crush, from a long time ago. She was different now. They were friends after all. Weren't they?

She plopped down next to him on the sofa, and he let out a startled "oof", pulling his wand and immediately scanning the room.

She opted for humor to hide the sadness of the truth that he probably did that for good reason. "You know, you would be a lot more convincing if you hadn't just been snoring louder than a hippogriff."

He immediately turned to her and dropped his wand - a lopsided smirk playing on his lips. "Because you're the one to talk, I'm fairly sure loud snoring is a Weasley trait at this point. What with your mid-summer pond naps."

"I do not snore!"

"Oh, so it was Ron who suddenly grew long bright red hair and started wearing bikinis by the pond?"

She refused to blush, not because of the fact that she may have been snoring this summer, but more his subtle admission that he had been watching her then, and that maybe she possibly considered that potential outcome when she chose napping locations.

"Could have been," she said, trying to sound nonchalant and playful as she settled back against the couch.

"What were you doing out here?"

Something passed across his face, and he looked at the fire, trying to sound normal. He wasn't fooling her. "I had stuff with Dumbledore earlier. I just couldn't quite go to sleep yet."

"Until you did, you mean."

He smirked at her. "Yeah, right." He eyed her for a minute, him just now registering her broom and clothes. "What were you doing anyway?"

"Flying - getting practice in for tryouts," she said, trying to appear as confident as possible. "I'm determined to be the best chaser Gryffindor has ever seen." She played it off bravely, but the doubt simmered under the surface.

He hummed and appeared thoughtful for a minute. "You know, I think you could be."

"Be serious," she said, playfully shoving his arm with her forearm. He let out a chuckle that warmed her instantly.

"I am," and his brows pinched more thoughtfully. "I mean look, Katie is good, real good. But, you have better vision than she does, and you are probably faster. I know that from experience this summer. You can fly circles around people. I don't see why you could not be the best. And it's not like you aren't working at it. We played quidditch all summer."

She smiled at the memories, warm summer days on end with flying, and Ron complaining.

A thought bubbled to the surface in her mind. And Harry. She looked for anything to say to get her mind off of that particular thought. They were friends now. Just friends...which was absolutely and totally fine with her.

"It's what I want to do for work you know...after Hogwarts and everything." She set her gaze on the dancing embers of the fire. She wasn't sure what made her say it. Divulge her deepest, most personal secret. To him. Now.

She felt his eyes on her again and fought the urge to blush. She didn't do that anymore. Worked too hard not to.

"Yeah...I can see that."

Her eyes snapped immediately to his, and she almost lost herself in them. His face was thoughtful, like she was some puzzle he couldn't quite work out.

"You mean that?"

His brow furrowed, not understanding her uncertainty. As if she hadn't spent every waking day questioning whether she had enough, would ever have enough.

"What do you mean? Of course, I do."

It wasn't possible to hide the smile that erupted across her face, or the warmth that filled her. Like he hadn't just been the first person who told her she could do it. Like it was obvious.

Not noticing this, Harry pressed on. "I mean, look at it this way, Gin. If you're this good now, imagine how good you will be in three years. And no one works harder at it than you. And you weren't even on the team full time last year. They would be crazy not to take you when you get there."

She ignored the nickname, and the unmistakable truth that she wouldn't have let anyone else get away with calling her that. "I don't know, got to make it past the new Gryffindor quidditch captain first to get on full time. I heard he's a bit barmy at times."

He pinched his eyes and let out a bark of a laugh that made her stomach flip.

"Well, if Wood and Angelina are anything to go by, I think that's part of the job description. I'll try to be less of an arse this year than last, but no promises."

"I'll hold you to that, then," she said, the smile still playing on her lips. Merlin, she was borderline flirting now. Friends...they were friends. And she had Dean - she liked Dean. She quickly scanned the room for a change of subject.

"So, what about you? Planning on putting your expert diving grabs to the professional test?"

He let out a small laugh before his face fell, back to the serious and determined look. Her heart sank at the loss of the warmth his smile provided. "Haven't really thought about that to be honest. Tonks is an Auror and Kingsley, so I think, maybe..." he trailed off shrugging, his eyes back to finding the fire. "It just seems right."

Neither one of them spoke for a moment. She knew he was thinking of Voldemort, and broken prophecies, and destinies. She silently kicked herself for not expecting it.

She picked up her broom and got up, feeling his eyes on her again. "Well, I am knackered, so I am off to shower and bed."

He gave her a brief smile. "Yeah, okay. See you."

She was about to turn, but something made her pause. "You know, whatever you decide to do...Auror...quidditch star...moody potion master...". He snorted, and she smirked at him. "It's your choice. And you aren't alone."

She felt it then again, his eyes holding on her, something burning behind them. Something she had just started to notice recently. Something different.

"Thanks, Gin."

#hinny microfic #hinny #HBP missing moment

[silverbladexyz]

Helloo! It is i, the same anon who requested the night and morning routines with the hunting dogs, and first of all i just wanted to say that i really love your writing and how detailed it is!! Everytime i read one of your fics i am literally so amazed at how you write the characters, no matter who it is. So when i saw that you’re requests were open i got so happy, and this time i would like to ask for the hunting dogs (YES THEM AGAIN, I JUST LOVE THEM SO MUCH) and how they would spend the holidays with their s/o, how they would prepare for christmas, etc. (and of course just platonic with Teruko, like a best friend reader. And also no Fukuchi lol) And once again, feel free to remove whoever you want to because i completely understand if this is too much. Anyways, i hope you have a great day/night!!

-🕯

Omg helloooo anon!!! Welcome back!! Thank you, I'm honoured to know that you like my writing >.< and I love the Hunting Dogs too, so of course I'll write for them :)

The images do not belong to me. They belong to their original owners.

TW: Slight mentions of death

Hunting Dogs spending holidays with their S/O (best friend for Teruko)

Tecchou:

-I feel like the Hunting Dogs don’t get a lot of holidays, however, for the sake of this post let’s say that they do ^-^

-Tecchou wouldn’t really mind spending the holidays in any way really, as long as he gets to spend time with you. You could literally drag him out to do a day-long hike or go shopping at the mall until it was 11PM and he would not complain. In fact, he likes it and always looks forward to going out to a new place everyday

-However, he also wouldn’t mind just spending time at home with you. Do some fun couples activities together! Like baking, playing video games, couples yoga, reading books, working out, anything really! Although please keep an eye on Tecchou when he bakes, because not only might he add some sus stuff into the mixture, he might set the house on fire

-Would probably wake up early just to exercise. I’m so sorry if you’re not a morning person, because Tecchou would drag you to exercise with him everyday at 7AM in the morning, even when it was the holidays. But sometimes, he also likes a good sleep in that includes a long cuddling session

-Holidays with him are either chill or quite adventure-filled. There is never a dull moment that goes by

-Now I feel like Tecchou doesn’t really celebrate Christmas; at the most he’ll bid everyone a ‘Merry Christmas’ and accept gifts from people. But he is more than happy to decorate a Christmas tree with you and just spend a great Christmas with you in general

-Oh but please tell Tecchou that the pine trees that are put up for Christmas are normally fake and could be bought in stores... because Tecchou is going to actually drag a pine tree all the way home to use as decoration. Yes, you heard me. A literal. Pine. Tree

-Even though it’s sweet that the thought’s there, I’m pretty sure that you wouldn’t want to be sharing your home with tons of bugs and whatever else lives in pine trees, am I right? Not to mention it probably is illegal to do that

-But other than that, Tecchou is absolutely down to celebrating Christmas the way you celebrate it. He’d help decorate the house, put Christmas lights everywhere, even put on some Christmas songs. Even when his taste in food is questionable, his taste in decoration is impeccable. Because all he wants for Christmas is to have a good time with you :)))

-Buy presents for him!!! He would be a bit clueless on why people give presents on Christmas, but he’ll catch on quickly, and even buy presents for you!! But beware, he’ll buy you a lot of presents, and they are the most random presents you have ever seen. Please educate him on this whole Christmas-gifts thing, because he’s trying :(

-Teach him everything about Christmas, because he would love to learn about it. Tecchou might even dress up as Santa Claus and volunteer at the local mall to talk to the kids, and he answers questions so seriously that the kids are lowkey scared of him lol. Please teach him before Jouno murders him

-Christmas nights are normally spent cuddling in front of the fireplace. It’s dark, the candles give a cosy atmosphere, and cuddling with Tecchou is the absolute best thing to do 💗

Jouno:

-Jouno isn’t really fussed on how he spends the holidays; so long as he isn’t exhausted by the end of the day or has to go to really loud places, then he’s perfectly fine with anything

-He strikes me more of the type to stay at home with you and spend quality time with you. You’ll find that cuddling sessions have increased by at least two times, and the amount of kisses too

-Slow dancing with him in the kitchen at nighttime!!! Even though Jouno’s blind, his other sharp senses and great reflexes make him a really good slow dancer. If you don’t know anything about slow dancing, he will teach you, but beware he might tease you a bit for how cute you looked as you were struggling to learn it. Step on his feet please

-Now that it’s the holidays, Jouno definitely is going to sleep in with you. If you wake him up early to work out with him, he’s going to be a bit annoyed, but he won’t object to working out with you. It might help him be stronger than Tecchou, afterall

-If you wanted to go out somewhere to spend time with him, Jouno doesn’t mind, as long as his senses don’t get overwhelmed. But he would prefer taking nice, long walks in the evening where the sunset is beautiful and there is just the two of you on the stroll

-In the rare moments, he might even link his fingers with yours. Hold his hand back and stroke it! It might catch him by surprise at first, but if you’re observant, you might just notice his thumb lightly stroking the back of your hand. It’s very soft though... so pay extra attention

-Honestly just wants to spend his holidays by being with you as much as he can. I feel like his love language is mostly quality time, so Jouno is going to spend as much time as possible with you

-Now for celebrating Christmas... Jouno isn’t really the type to celebrate Christmas. However, convince him and he will eventually join in with your Christmas celebration. He wouldn’t want the house to be decorated too much though, because he just doesn’t want to spend a lot of time packing them up :/

-But he will go gift shopping with you! I headcanon that Jouno has great tastes when it comes to presents, it’s just that sometimes he’s a troll and gets you something to tease you. However he will be serious and buy you some extra nice gifts for Christmas

-I feel like Jouno would be a bit more romantic on Christmas. Playful kisses, fleeting touches, and just being more romantic in general. If you tease him for being all lovey-dovey and soft, he’s going to tease you extra hard 10x back

-Would definitely whisper to you a merry Christmas on Christmas Eve, probably accompanied by a kiss

Tachihara:

-Tachihara definitely wants to get out of the house and spend the holidays with you

-I feel like he’s more of the hiking and beach type, but if you wanted to go shopping with him he’d gladly accompany you. Just please don’t buy too much stuff because he’s going to trip and fall while carrying them

-Sleeping in and cuddles is a must. Now that Tachihara has more time to spend with you, he’s not losing a second of it, so expect lots and lotsss of affection. He won’t do it every single second, but when he does, you’ll be covered in hugs and kisses

-Also loves taking walks with you. He would take you to actual 5km walks where the scenery is beautiful, and you wouldn’t feel so tired because Tachihara would keep you company. But if you were absolutely exhausted, Tachihara will definitely give you a piggyback ride, maybe even carry you bridal style when nobody’s around xD

-Video games and movie nights!!! I headcanon that Tachihara loves playing Mario-Kart and Fortnite, as well as anything you play. Most of the time you two end up trolling little kids on Roblox, and it’s mighty fun. Even then, it’s very amusing watching Tachihara play, because he always manages to make the gameplay interesting

-Now for Christmas... Tachihara secretly wants to celebrate Christmas with you so bad, because when he was younger his family unfortunately did not celebrate it with him. So go all out and celebrate Christmas in the most fun way possible! Buy heaps of gifts, decorate the entire house with Christmas lights, hang up Christmas stockings, just do everything with him! He’ll love it, and he’ll also fall in love with you more

-Definitely lights up a fire in the fireplace and watches good Christmas movies with you, alongside a nice hot cup of cocoa or hot chocolate. Also cuddles with you wrapped in blankets on the couch, and it’s just really nice and cosy

-Also sings a lot of Christmas karaoke with you. I feel like he would be great at singing if he removed the roughness in his voice. I headcanon he likes singing ‘All I Want For Christmas Is You’, because it’s such a nostalgic song

-Christmas is his favourite celebration now, because he can spend it with you 💗

Teruko:

-Having Teruko as a best friend means that she’s dragging you to a lot of places to hang out in the holidays

-Most of the time she would go shopping or swimming at the beach. Teruko would definitely swim out to the farthest distance she could, and she will throw a tantrum if people tell her that she couldn’t. If you tell her that the sea could easily sweep her away or if there’s dangerous marine life out there, it just makes her more adamant to swim out. She’ll even wrestle a shark if that meant she could swim as far as she wanted lmao Teruko please don’t

-Teruko is going to buy whatever is on discount. And when I say whatever, I mean whatever. Mostly she’ll buy stuff that she thinks Fukuchi likes, but she’ll also be happy to buy stuff that you like too! Teruko will mostly judge stuff and be picky, but the stuff that she thinks are good are actually the best quality. So always trust Teruko’s gut on which items are good or not

-Working out in the gym together! Don’t underestimate Teruko’s small stature, because she can just use her ability and suddenly turn into a very strong woman. She might even have competitions with you to see who can lift the heaviest weights and who could run the fastest on the treadmill she always wins lmao

-But sometimes even extraverts need to recharge. On those times Teruko is just perfectly happy to chill with you, talking about whatever comes to mind. Or you two would watch a tv show or a movie, sometimes judging the film if it was bad

-Also don’t be surprised if Teruko rocks up to your house and announces that she’s booked a trip to a nearby island for a day. She loves planning surprises, and frankly speaking those islands that she drags you to are pretty nice, with lots of activities to do on them. And she will cover the cost, but it would be nice if you treated her to some food and stuff (dw being a Hunting Dog means you’re rich)

-Amusement parks!!! Teruko loves going on rides, especially the ones that are super tall and big and with a lot of twists and turns. But prepare yourself for a lot of her tantrums, because she’s always too short for the ride lol. Teruko ends up using her ability in the end, but she is very vocal at expressing her annoyance

-And just because it’s the holidays, doesn’t mean that she’ll stop asking for piggyback rides. In fact, her requests for piggyback rides will double. Teruko won’t force you to give her a piggyback ride if you were really tired, but be prepared to give her a lot of piggyback rides the next day

-Now onto Christmas! Teruko would love celebrating Christmas with you, and she normally would go to a restaurant with you to have a Christmas dinner. She might even invite Fukuchi and the rest of the Hunting Dogs, and by the end of it Fukuchi is so drunk, Tecchou mixes a lot of suspicious food combinations, Jouno is ready to murder everyone, Tachihara is close to crying, and Teruko is also drinking with Fukuchi. Good luck dealing with them, but don’t worry because Jouno and Tachihara are surprisingly good at dealing with these stuff

-Teruko definitely invites you over to her house on Christmas. She sets up a pine tree, decorates it nicely, hangs flashy Christmas lights and stockings everywhere, basically just going all out with decorations. If you pay close attention, you might even catch her singing some Christmas songs when she thinks she is alone. Don’t tell her you saw though, because Teruko will threaten to punch you

-You two would also spend Christmas singing Christmas songs and watching Christmas movies. Teruko is definitely in a much more energetic mood, and she will be wishing everybody a ‘Merry Christmas’ before you two go to sleep (Jouno was so confused lmao)

@pixyys @pianotross @yuugen-benni @the-mourning-stars @xxelfmamaxx @nekokinax @catzlivedforbsd @i-just-like-goats

#bsd x reader #bungou stray dogs x reader #hunting dogs x reader #tecchou x reader #jouno x reader #tachihara x reader #teruko x reader #🕯 anon #silverbladexyz

[azureseacloud]

Stage Lights

Ghost (Band)

Part 5

Swiss x Reader

Warnings: swearing

Words: 1,352

Hi everyone, sorry for the long gap in updates. I’ve gotten caught up with a few things but finally got around to posting.

Some good news though—this is a double update—Part 6, the final part of Stage Lights has also been posted :))

Anyway, I hope you like it, it does get a little rocky in this part. Thanks for all the support, you all are awesome <3

You smiled at Dewdrop beside you, celebrating your victory as the two of you held hands for the final bow.

Then your other hand was enveloped in a tight squeeze, and you knew exactly who it was without looking. Swiss.

“That was quite the performance,” he hissed quietly as you all bowed in sync. You still didn’t look at him, beaming instead at the audience as they all applauded and screamed out their appreciation.

“It was. Didn’t like having your spotlight stolen, did you?” You jabbed back, chancing a glance at him. His teeth were bared in what probably looked like his signature wide smile to the crowd, but up close you could see that he was clenching his teeth. Swiss was definitely more than pissed.

“Someone’s jealous,” Dew muttered smugly from your other side, and Swiss growled under his breath as you all bowed again.

After the bows were over and everyone started to seperate, Swiss still held your hand in a firm grip. Dew was not letting go either, and you could tell he was smirking under the mask.

The two ghouls eyed each other, Swiss glaring while Dew stared back smugly. The fire ghoul raised his chin slightly in a challenge that had Swiss tightening his grip on your hand. Your heart plummeted as you realised that Swiss was moments away from lunging at Dew—on fucking stage. In front of thousands of people.

And you were right in the middle.

Acting quickly you stepped back, dragging the two of them with you. They both took their eyes off each other as you pulled them along unexpectedly. Swiss stopped after a few steps, turning his stare back to Dew.

“Don’t you fucking dare,” you hissed.

“You should have-“

“Shut the fuck up Dew,” you interrupted him, knowing whatever he was about to say was meant to taunt Swiss further. Of course Dewdrop was going to try to push Swiss as far as he could. But if they fought on stage you were all royally fucked. Possibly even sent-back-to-the-pit-fucked.

You shook the fire ghoul’s hand out of yours as calmly as you could, still very aware of the crowd that was watching.

You shot Rain a thankful look as he came up behind the smaller ghoul, wrapping an arm around Dew and pulling him away and into an embrace. The water ghoul nodded, giving you a chance to get Swiss away from the view of the crowd.

You tugged at Swiss’s hand, and this time he began walking with you again as you headed off stage.

As soon as you were in the curtain wings, he shook off your hand.

“Swiss-“

“Fuck off.” You shrunk back at his words, shocked. His head was turned to the side, avoiding your eyes. “You liked that didn’t you? Taunting me with fucking Dewdrop.”

You watched as he ran a hand along his mask, gripping his horns then touching the tubes that circled the side of the face.

“What, like how you taunted me at the last show?” You retorted, crossing your arms as your temper flared.

He looked at you then, hands flexing into fists at his side. Distantly you registered that the other ghouls and ghoulettes had gathered in a group a few feet away, watching the two of you. You didn’t care, not when you were in the middle of dealing with this asshole in front of you.

“It was his idea, wasn’t it?” he hissed, venom lacing every word.

“What does it fucking matter whose idea it was? We were just getting back at you for all the times you’ve done shit to us,” you hissed back.

“This was different,” he growled.

“Oh really? How the fuck was this different from what you do every show!?”

He bared his teeth and you could feel the anger rolling off him. A spark of purple quintessence zapped along his forearm and you could begin to feel heat rolling off him. “Because I didn’t use another ghoul to get to you!”

You paused, flinging your hands out to the side, ignoring the signs that Swiss was beginning to lose control. Out of the corner of your eye you could see someone striding over, but you weren’t done yet.

“What does that have to do with anything? You’re pathetic. It’s just a fucking spotlight Swiss, you missed out for one show, big deal!”

“Hey!” Copia’s voice was stern. The two of you didn’t move, still locked in an intense stare down. “Look at me.”

You reluctantly broke eye contact with the multi ghoul. Copia reached a hand in between the two of you, pushing you apart.

“You both need to calm down right now. I will not have my ghouls fighting backstage.” It sounded like he was telling off children, his voice calm with a commanding undertone of authority that you knew better than to ignore.

“Sorry Papa,” you said, Swiss not saying anything. He was avoiding eye contact, looking down at his boots.

“I want you two to go get ready. We leave in ten minutes.” Copia massaged a hand across his temples tiredly and turned away, leaving the two of you still standing there.

You waited for Swiss to say something, the multi ghoul tense in a way you’d never seen him.

He turned his head, looking at you now. Swiss laughed bitterly as he shook his head.

“You’re the pathetic one here sweetheart,” he said, returning to where both of you had left off before Copia had intervened. “You can’t even see what’s right in fucking front of you.”

You took a step forward, clenching your fist but Swiss just turned and strode out, not looking back at you.

Of fucking course he just had to have the last word.

Silently counting to ten in a method that Rain had taught you, you forced yourself to calm down even though all you wanted was to storm out after him and punch his stupid fucking face.

“That was intense,” Aurora said softly. She was beside you, watching where Swiss had left. “Are you okay?”

“Why is he like this?” You sighed, frustrated. “So…so petty!? He does this to me but as soon as I beat him at his own game it’s too much?”

The sense of victory from earlier had faded, replaced with frustration and a simmering guilt. You’d never seen Swiss react like that—he rarely lost his temper. Had you overstepped? Had you actually hurt him?

Aurora reached out, resting her hand delicately on your arm.

“It probably has something to do with the fact he’s head over heels for you,” she said sweetly, resting her head on your shoulder. “Everybody knows except you. And we can all tell that you like him just as much, though you won’t admit it.”

You faltered, looking down at her in shock as she gave you a knowing smile. Did she just…did that mean?

“I don’t like him—“

“You two should just fuck and make up already.” Dew sauntered over, interrupting your false denial. Aurora giggled, flitting away to join the other ghoulettes as they went to get ready to leave, leaving you reeling from what she’d said.

Swiss actually liked you. All this time you had convinced yourself that it was the spotlight he wanted, only to be so very wrong. Dew hadn’t been kidding.

What the fuck were you supposed to do now?

You punched Dew in the arm, the fire ghoul jumping back.

“Fuck, what was that for?“

“The shit-show after final bows. You kept pushing him even though you knew he was losing control.”

Dew tilted his head mischievously. “Aww look at you, worrying about Swissy’s feelings. What was that about not liking him?”

You flipped him off with both of your hands, striding away from the fire ghoul before you strangled him.

Guilt was still swirling in your chest as you walked away. Maybe you had pushed him too far. But you had thought Dew had been joking—you’d never thought that it would make him jealous like that.

Swiss would be over it by tomorrow, right?

#ghost band #the band ghost #nameless ghouls #dewdrop ghoul #swiss ghoul #nameless ghouls x reader #dewdrop ghost #swiss ghost

[queen-of-writing-bad-things]

Henry Danger Reader Insert | Captain Man x Reader: SEASON 3

Episode 12: Gas or Fail (SMUT)

*warning, warning, warning, actual, genuine spiciness and filth ahead - look out for the in-chapter warnings (it's not my best but this was just the beginning, so let's get started.)*

smut includes: (y/n) is muy horny, p in v sex, outdoor(?) sex (idk it's in a cave), dom! ray, sub (y/n), light fingering (just a smidge cos le smut is short), creampie. think that's it.

~In the Man Cave~

So, Captain Man had many traditions, some were cute, some were weird and some were just plain necessary. The time had rolled around once again where Ray made Schwoz test his superpower to make sure it hadn't deteriorated or weakened since the last time they tried it. And for years, the genius only had one superhero to work on as Ray was alone with his uniqueness, but now, he also had (y/n) and Henry to work on. All they had to do was wait for the kid to get to work after college.

"I'm actually pretty excited about it." (y/n) told her boyfriend, walking out from the back room where she had been feeding Colin as Schwoz set up all his equipment. The bunny had settled in nicely and she had to say, he was really part of the family, even if she did have to watch Schwoz like a hawk, making sure he wasn't experimenting on him. Anyway, each test would be similar, but for each person, he was going to have different results so he had to be prepared for that. Probably because Ray threatened him with unimaginable violence if something went wrong and his precious sweet girl got hurt.

"I don't you getting hurt." He murmured back, pressing his lips to her forehead as they sat on a chair in the main room, her perched on his lap. All the waiting was making Ray antsy, especially since the "pain machine" was in his line of sight; he just wanted to keep her protected, even if this whole charade was necessary and an important safety test.

"I'm Miss Danger, I don't get hurt." She reassured him and cupped his jaw so she could capture his mouth with hers. It was weird, normally he was the needy one, but on that particular day, he looked so damn fine, she just wanted to have him all to herself. Ray was more than happy to let her indulge in his bubblegum-mint taste and his hands clenched on her waist when her hips started undulating on their own. Geez, she really was needy.

The elevator dinged and in walked Henry, who shrugged off his bag and grimaced at the sight of Ray eating (y/n)'s face. Ugh, why did they have to do it where everyone could see? Noticing that his sidekick had arrived, the superhero broke the kiss so they could get this shit over and done with, but (y/n) wasn't quite ready to let go.

"Sweet girl...he's here." He chuckled when she clenched her fists tightly around the material of his zip-up hoodie and tried to keep the smooch going. God, he looked so good in it, she just wanted him to love her and she had to clench her thighs together to stop the ache in between them.

"Fine, let's do this thing." She grumbled, pulling away from him reluctantly and folding her arms with a pout on her face. Looks like she'd have to wait until later to get some action. 

"Aye-aye" Schwoz nodded and started powering up whatever he was going to use, but Henry needed to discuss something with them first and he'd say it was more important than the superpower thing.

"Uh, hey. Wait, guys, I didn't get any lunch at school, can we order some, like, Chinese food?" The boy asked the essential thing that had been praying on his mind all afternoon. If his stomach growling was anything to go by, he need some chow and he needed it soon. (y/n) hopped off her boyfriend's knee so he could change his shoes (why he needed to do that, she didn't know) and looked at Henry weirdly.

"What? Why Chinese food?" She asked, trying to shake off the fire pooling in her stomach and focus on what should've been a normal day. Stupid Ray and his stupid hot, sexy, handsome face and body.

"I want some of them, oh, whaddya call 'em? They're like Chinese dumplings?" Henry described, knowing exactly what he meant, but he couldn't quite get the name off the tip of his tongue. Luckily though, he was friends with Schwoz, he ordered Chinese way too often and knew the names of most things on every menu in town. Well, he did when it was described clearly.

"Oh, you mean wom-pons?" He asked, trying to think of the dish he was talking about. He knew what it was, but due to his thick accent, Schwoz mispronounced the name and like usual, Henry couldn't decipher it.

"Yeah...nooooo." He frowned, still not used to Schwoz and his weird way of speaking, despite him having worked as Kid Danger for over three years now. At least he had Ray, who had known the genius the longest and knew exactly what he was saying, well, most of the time.

"Won-tons, he means won-tons, not wom-pons." He stressed, quickly tying his shoelaces whilst (y/n) circled him so she could start rubbing his shoulders. He didn't know what her game was, but wow, her small hands felt like magic, even if they were feeling him up rather than massaging away his aches and pains.

"I did my best to say it right," Schwoz grumbled, kicking himself for screwing up his English again. He hated how complicated the language was and how he often made mistakes that he was teased for.

"Whatever, can we order some?" Henry asked his boss and put a supportive hand on Schwoz's shoulder. At least he tried his best.

"Not now, it's time for my bi-yearly quantitative physiological densitisation test." Ray put his hands on his hips, proud that he'd managed to say the complicated sentence with its multi-syllabic words all in one go. It made him feel so damn smart.

"I understood the word, test." Henry, on the other hand, wasn't so smart and picked up nothing apart from that Ray was doing something that sounded important. 

"It's a test to make sure that he's totally indestructible and no one can hurt him." (y/n) explained it in much simpler terms, wrapping her arms around Ray's waist so she could snuggle into his side. 

"Mmmmm, can we get some won-tons first? I'll order them, you two don't even have to stop being gross and all...huggy." Henry wrinkled his nose, gesturing to how the couple cuddled even when they were stood up. It was sickeningly cute and now a common occurrence in the Man Cave, not that it made it any easier to ignore.

"No, and we are not gross," Ray told him firmly, not seeing why he should let the kid order his food when he was mildly insulting him. He loved how snuggly and needy his girl was being today and he'd be damned if his sidekick got in the way of that.

"You'll understand when you're older and have a girlfriend." (y/n) bit her tongue as she smiled at Henry's overreaction. Yeah, he liked girls, but he didn't like them that much. Not yet, anyway.

"You see that machine over there?" Ray pointed to some weird launcher thing that Schwoz had primed and armed so it was now smoking from the back. Next to it was a smaller but still deadly laser cannon that was going to be used on (y/n), something she wasn't particularly looking forward to, but it was always cool to see how her body could heal itself.

"Yeah..." Henry nodded, wondering why there was so much machinery out for one superhero and his test. Little did he know...

"It's gonna shoot baseballs at ya." The young woman smirked, watching in amusement as the boy paled slightly. They wanted to do what to him?

"Bu--what? Why me?" He gasped, not realising that since he was now part of the superpower squad, he had to have all these regular checkups.

"Because! Because of your new superpower."Ray answered, making Henry throw his head back with a groan. He knew there had to be a catch, he just didn't know it would be so risky. "Yeah, you're hyper-mutilatiew..." Schwoz joined in, but his tongue just didn't want to work, so it came out all slurred and jumbled.

"Okay, it's hyper-motility." Henry enunciated, trying to give the small man an elocution lesson as Ray began stretching and warming up for his test. His muscles were flexing and tensing and when she got a small peek of the skin above his waistband, (y/n) nearly collapsed. If she could, she'd get on her knees in that very moment and show him how much she wanted to please him.

"Okay, okay, can we just move on?" She asked, needing to get her head in the game since she was about to be blasted with a powerful, skin-burning, hair-frying, utterly devasting beam that would kill a fully grown man. Not her though, of course.

"Schwoz, show him your bat," Ray ordered his handyman, also wanting to get on with the test since it was his chance to show off in front of his girlfriend. Yeah, she'd see how tough he was.

"His--his what?" Henry stuttered, praying that his boss wasn't euphemistically referring to something else. 

"You see...when you see the balls a-comin', you use this a-base-a-ball bat to swing-schvat the balls." He explained in his little Schwoz way and brought over a steel baseball bat for Henry. Thank god, it was a bat and not something awful like the boy had been fearing.

"Yep and then Schwoz is gonna measure the speed of the base-a-balls and then, after I get hit, I tell him when my pain stops and I feel okay." Ray finished, making sure to not pass up the opportunity of mocking the small guy. 

"And then, I will use my big brain and a mathematical equation to determine how indestructible Ray is." (y/n) smiled up at her boyfriend, fluttering her eyelashes like it would entice him to postpone the test for half an hour, just to quench her desires. Fat chance.

"...I just want, like, five won-tons," Henry whined, feeling like faint from low blood sugar or something. Food, that's all he wanted and after that, they could do whatever tests they liked.

"You can have some won-tons after we do this!" Ray snapped in an agitated tone. It would take like five minutes to do this; Henry could wait. "Right..."

"I'm gonna go stand here by the elevator. That's what I'm gonna do." The superhero said and swaggered over to the spot where he would be hit by the baseballs. Not wanting to be beaten up prematurely, (y/n) ducked behind the couch and awaited the beginning of the experiment with paper and pen. Schwoz was equally nervous; he put a large, clear cubic helmet onto his head and clipped it to his boiler suit. 

"What's that for?" Henry asked, sharing a confused look with Ray. Neither of them could see why being hit in the face with a rogue, flying ball would be a bad thing, mainly because when it happened to them, they always came out with no cuts or bruises.

"To protect a-my face from stray balls." He answered, his voice sounded filtered and robotic from the protective headgear. Whatever, they had to get on.

"Henry, take this base-a-ball bat..." Schwoz twisted the handle of the bat and pressed a button, making it illuminate like some kind of lightsaber shit, which thoroughly impressed Henry.

"Whoa, what kinda baseball bat is this?" He asked, twirling it around and admiring how it blurred into a whiz of white light. 

"It's thermal fusion bat I made myself." The genius said smugly, thinking he was oh so clever with his invention, but he was forgetting that he didn't work on it alone.

"Hey, I helped!" (y/n) called out from her hiding place, feeling irritated from his blatant dismissal of how she assisted in putting the damn thing together and from how Ray was blind to how much she wanted him. She should've dragged him back to bed when they woke that morning.

"You did the wiring." Schwoz scoffed, thinking that a little soldering and assembling was nothing compared to the science and schematics he studied. What a jumped-up, little asshole.

"All right, do it yourself next time, you dick." She muttered and flopped back onto her butt in a sulk.

"Can you make thermal fusion won-tons?" Henry asked, still having food on the brain. He couldn't swing on an empty stomach, but that was exactly what Ray planned on making him do.

"Come on, Henry, just get over there!" Ray instructed him and the kid sighed but did as he was told. He wheeled the chair from earlier out of the way and got into position. 

"Yah, yah, yah, here we go!" Schwoz squealed and ran back up to his controls so they could begin. "Okay, let's test one." He clapped his hands together and Ray prepared himself, shaking his body loose and clearing his mind. 

"Go for it." He growled, making (y/n) squirm as she peeped over the top of the sofa. That look in his eyes, the one he had when he was beyond determined, made her whimper.

"Ready, Henry?" Schwoz took one last chance to stop the machine, but the sidekick was also eager to do this thing. "Yeah, go."

Schwoz slammed his hand down on the release button and a baseball was fired from the cannon at a speed so fast, it could barely be seen by the naked eye. Henry's reflexes didn't care about that though, the boy whacked the ball as if it was going in slow motion and it pinged off his bat and hit the elevator so hard, it disintegrated the metal in a puff of smoke. Poor Ray, he didn't even get the chance to test out his superpower. 

"Hahahaha! Missed me, missed me, now you gotta ki---" Ray jeered at the boy, but it soon died when he realised that in these circumstances, he rather eat his own foot than kiss the boy. Ew, ew, ew, there was only one person he wanted to kiss and she thought his sudden shy attitude was so darn cute. 

"Now he gotta what?" She teased, loving how his cheeks were dusted pink and even Henry was amused by how he'd flustered himself. 

"Nothin', forget it." He rubbed his neck and avoided her playful gaze, which allowed her to check him out. From his floppy, brown hair to his slim waist that she knew was chiselled with pure muscle, she could hardly breathe when she analysed every part of him that she loved, which was everything that made up Ray Manchester. 

"No, no, no, now I gotta what?" It was Henry's turn to tease him, making his boss go all pouty and he scuffed his shoe against the tiles. "No, I changed my mind, okay? You don't gotta do anything." He squeaked quickly, his words jumbling together so fast that it was obvious that he was shy.

"Aw, you want to kissy, kissy, kissy." (y/n) pursed her lips together and giggled when he screwed his nose up at her silly voice. He did want to kissy, kissy, kissy, but with her only and it annoyed him when people mocked him otherwise.

"God, come on, Schwoz, if we're gonna do this, let's do it! God!" The sidekicks giggled and high-fived each other at how they made a grown man stamp his feet over something so silly. Okay, serious time, serious time.

"Okay, here we goes." Schwoz popped another ball into the machine and the young woman knelt behind the couch once again, ready to work out the math when Schwoz told her to.

"Oh, Ray, I gotta tell you somethin'." Henry suddenly remembered that he had something more critical than food to tell his boss, not that it was the best time to tell him.

"What?" Ray asked, just as Schwoz shouted for another ball being released. Even though he wasn't expecting it in the least, Henry reacted perfectly and whacked the ball like a pro. It ricocheted across the room and collided with Ray's jaw, sending him to the floor with a groan of pain. (y/n) winced at the velocity, but she needn't worry, the ever indestructible Captain Man sprung to his feet with a smirk.

"I'm okay!" He bragged, happily using his catchphrase since it made his girl breathe a sigh of relief. Aw, he liked it when she cared. 

"Two-hundred and four miles per hour, (y/n)," Schwoz reported as he read from his scanner and once she heard the figure, the woman began doing the long division, multiplication, subtraction and whatever else the equation called for. She liked math, not as much as mechanics, but then again, a lot of that boiled down to numbers and fractions.

"What did want to tell me?" Ray questioned, not once looking away from his girl as her tongue poked out in concentration. The sight of her moist lips entranced him and it was hard to pay attention to what the kid was saying.

"I can't make it to work tomorrow," Henry revealed, which captured his focus. He played a vital role in the Man Cave team and Ray didn't like the sound of being one sidekick down.

"What do you mean you can't make it to work tomorrow?!" He exclaimed, but the conversation would have to be put on hold as Schwoz sent the second ball through the machine. They needed an average, not just a one-off figure, so they'd have to do this a few times.

Henry hit the ball dead-on again, this time sending it into Ray's arm, which on any normal person, would break their arm clean through, but not with him. He fell again but quickly recovered.

"Still okay." He smirked, making eye contact with his girl when he caught her staring. What was with her today? She kept blushing and looking at him, not that he minded. It actually made him feel very cocky.

"Two-hundred and seventeen miles per hour," Schwoz announced, allowing (y/n) to move onto her second equation; the same process but with the new figure. 

"Tomorrow's Achievement Test Day at school," Henry told him, casually resting the bat on his shoulder, but unlike him, Ray was anything but calm at the news of this dumb school crap.

"Hey, you're my sidekick, that means tha--" Oh, poor Ray. The next ball came fast and furious, bouncing from Henry and landing square in his crotch, making everyone else wince at the sore impact. (y/n) was especially touched, since that was what she'd been after all day and their main chance of having children in the future.

"You guessed it; okay." He smirked, shaking off the excruciating agony to keep up his nonchalant manner. Yeah, (y/n) didn't have to worry, she'd get what she wanted, both promptly and distantly.

"Two-hundred and thirty-six miles per hour." The next result came in, each one increasing as Henry got into the swing of things. He should think about playing for Swellview High's baseball team if he could keep the game fair.

"Look, dude, it's not my fault, okay? If I leave school for any reason, I can get in huge trouble." Henry explained, not that Ray and his childishness could recognise how important this was to the boy. 

"Okay, fine, you baby. Take the day off, but it's comin' out of your vacation time." Ray conceded, confusing (y/n) and Henry, who had never taken a vacation day in the entire duration of their employment.

"We get vacation time?" (y/n) frowned, still counting herself amongst the workers since she received a paycheck every month, not that she counted this as work anymore. She deemed it "living with the hot boyfriend and occasionally kicking ass with him". 

"Uh, ah, eh--you...uh, you--you don't. I mean there's no state law that says you do, so y'know don't even check." Ray bit his lip, not wanting to admit that he lawfully owed his helpers time off, but he hated being without them since it made his life boring and/or dangerous. He liked having them around, not that he would ever be without his sweet girl.

"Wait, so are you saying that--" Henry was also confused, but Ray didn't want to talk about the awkward topic, so he yelled the release word and another ball was fired at the teen. He'd rather take another hit than admit his failings, but he wouldn't have to. Henry's aim was slightly off and this time, rather than hurting Ray, the ball smashed through Schwoz's useless helmet and smacked into his face. 

The three watched as the small man's eyes rolled back and he collapsed down the steps, completely wiped out. Oops, maybe he should've hidden behind a solid object like (y/n).

"He's probably all right." She shrugged, wandering over to his body with Henry and Ray. He was breathing, so she assumed that he wasn't going to die.

"Yeah..." Henry nodded, feeling a little guilty that he'd knocked the guy out when he was trying to help him. It wasn't his fault, not really.

"Get some won-tons?" The boy suggested, suddenly wanting to be anywhere but near Schwoz when he woke up with the mother of all headaches and no doubt the opinion that he was to blame.

"Yeah, sure, let's go." Ray quickly agreed and grabbed (y/n)'s hand so he could lead her to the supercomputer, where they could order some Chinese food. They'd order something for Schwoz too, of course, and hopefully, it would be enough to tame his inevitable anger.

~The next day~

So, (y/n) felt like she was burning up inside or dying. Yeah, dying sounded accurate. She had tried all day yesterday to try and seduce Ray into fucking her through his mattress, but no luck. 

When Schwoz had finished yelling at them and they'd eaten an entire Chinese buffet, including about a million won-tons, the superheroes had received call after call after call, forcing them to stay out until the early hours of the morning. Even when Henry had gone home early to sleep before his big test day thing, she still couldn't tempt him into her dark morality, nor could she when she wiggled her best assets or gazed at him with smouldering eyes. Ray was too tired by 2 AM, leaving her with no choice but to lay and listen to his heartbeat as he dozed off and she tried to keep the depths of her mind from stirring up all kinds of dreams that made her subtly grind up against him. 

The morning was no better, just when (y/n) thought that she might be able to pounce on Ray before he could leave the bed, Swellview's stupid emergency alarm started ringing, indicating that a major sitch was going down. Ray immediately sat up and flicked on the TV that was mounted on the wall, listening intently as Trent Overrunder described how a gas pipe had burst underground and was now leaking toxic fumes into the city. The cry from Mary for Swellview's greatest heroes to help forced Captain Man into action since he and his sidekicks were the only ones who were brave enough to go down into the Earth.

And so, (y/n) was dragged from the comfort of her soft sheets, made to put on the costume that hugged her in all the right places and sent off with Ray to clog up the leak. No matter how many times she tried to take a kiss further or subtly slide her hand down his stomach, he just pulled away and ranted about how innocent people were in danger, meaning the poor girl had to swallow down her desires and do as she was told. 

Now, getting to the burst pipe was quite tricky; they had to abseil down a narrow ravine, which was dug out in an old mine known for roof collapses and falling boulders. Yeah, it was pretty scary. It also didn't help that Schwoz had stupidly packed one rope, so Ray was currently descending the drop with his girl strapped to his chest and a song to pass the time.

"Captain Man, (y/n), beware! He's so attractive, you'll want to kiss his face...right on the mouth!" He sang pretty poorly, but she didn't care. Their noses were brushing against one another and his not-so-subtle way of asking her for a kiss reignited the fire that she had managed to contain on the drive to the old mineshaft. 

"Oh, my captain." She joked with a giggle and connected their lips in a hot kiss that made her melt against him as they swung a few metres off the ground. She was desperate to take it further and feel those lips move elsewhere, but then Ray remembered that they were down there for a reason and they had yet to make contact with home base.

"Schwoz, you there?" Ray said into his satellite phone, disconnecting their passionate tangle in favouring of ringing up his trusty assistant back in the Man Cave, even if he did crave more of her honey-like taste.

"Yah, what?" Schwoz's voice crackled over the poor signal, but it was understandable and a miracle that the phone was still receiving and transmitting so deep underground. 

"We're now two-hundred and fifty feet down in the nuclear gas shaft," Ray reported, but the small guy was taking advantage of the peace and quiet by watching one of his favourite TV shows, meaning he wasn't interested in what was happening to them. "Yeah, so?"

"Sooo, as soon as we can, we're gonna---ahhhh!" Oh, dear. Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. The superhero never got the chance to finish his sentence as a terrible combination of the old rope snapping and a shaft collapse coincided at exactly the wrong moment.

The couple fell a few feet to the murky floor, which wasn't a terrible drop considering that Ray's indestructible body took the brunt force of it so (y/n) would have a softer landing. He didn't want to see her hurt, even if she was nearly as powerful as him with her healing. The real problem came when rocks, planks of wood and other debris came dropping on top of them, forcing him to quickly roll her over so he could curl over her body and shelter her from whatever tumbled past their heads. The whimper from having the weight of him on top of her was mistaken by Ray as fear and he suddenly became hyperaware of what danger they were in. 

"Ray? Ray, what was the noises I just heard?" They heard Schwoz's concerned voice over the battered radio and Ray flopped to his girlfriend's side as they coughed and spluttered at the gas and dust that filled the air. (y/n) was fairly sure that she was littered with bruises and cuts, but trusted in her ability to clean them up in seconds.

"Ah, our stupid support beam broke." Ray grimaced, helping his girl to her feet whilst he looked up at the ravine they had just descended. God, the rope was shredded and the walls were sheer, unstable clay and rock, leaving them stranded in the festering pit.

"Can you get out?" Schwoz asked, suddenly disregarding his TV show as a calamity emerged. This was really fucking serious.

"No, the top of the shaft is mostly blocked off and the walls look like they could cave in at any moment." (y/n) butted in, leaning in close to the receiver as Ray curled an arm around her waist. He felt like she needed support in the tense moment, but little did he know, the small action made her use all her resilience to stop herself from jumping him.

"Oooh, that reminds me. This afternoon, I have my colonoscopy." They could hear his smile over the airwaves, drawing groans from the couple. He'd have to cancel it for the third time, they needed rescuing.

"Schwoz! We don't wanna hear about your body problems, all right? There's a lady present and we're trapped down here." Ray scolded him, making (y/n) smile at his protectiveness. She didn't care about what medical problems Schwoz have, but it was nice to know that he wanted to save what little innocence she had left. She was throwing it out the window if it meant she'd get to stop the thrumming pulse between her legs.

"Okay, you want me and to come and get you and your girlfriend?" Schwoz groaned at the prospect of having to move his butt, but it wasn't so simple. The way Ray and (y/n) had entered was utterly sealed off.

"You can't, what part of blocked off don't you understand?" (y/n) questioned sarcastically, starting to get irritated when she realised that they'd be down here for at least two hours, leaving her to die from being overly-horny.

"Okay, bye-bye." The genius took that as a sign that they'd be fine on their own, after all, they had craved it for so long before they had finally revealed their true feelings. 

"No, no, Schwoz! Now look, write this down..." Ray started, but Schwoz wasn't a fan of being patronised. He could remember this easily. "Okay...I need you to triple beep Henry. Get him out of the school. Tell him to pop a gumball...And then he's got to get the Tyson drill, come to the gas plant and then Henry needs to drop into the ventilator shaft, which is right next to us, drill through the wall and get us outta here." Ray gave his instructions clearly and succinctly with Schwoz repeating what he said every few seconds like he was paying attention. His show was much more entertaining.

"Got it," Schwoz confirmed, having written none of it down, but was confident that he had everything tucked away in his mind. Positively, his confidence was well-founded.

"Oh, and tell him to bring some of those won-tons." (y/n) added, guessing that if she was rather peckish now, she'd be ravenous by the time they were found. It was a small request, but a good one.

"Bring some wom-pons," Schwoz confirmed in his weird accent, playing on Ray's temper, which was irritated every time he said something incorrectly. It didn't help that he and his girl were trapped in a smelly hole either. "Won-tons!"

"Calm down, grumpy." (y/n) told him soothingly, wiping away the dust and grime that had settled on his jaw and cheeks. She overlooked the way his growling voice reverberated through her bones and settled in her core in favour of chasing away his anger.

"If you live in America, you should learn how to say won-tons." He huffed and pulled a laser from his pocket in an attempt to cut through the metal door of an old elevator. The orange beam illuminated the room and the two watched as it lightly scorched the metal, but stood no chance of melting it away. Whatever rust and gunk had solidified on it over the years was pretty tough and even if they did get through, there was always the chance that the elevator shaft was collapsed too. 

"Well, we could fix the gas leak." (y/n) suggested when that plan failed. If they died down here, at least they'd know that they'd done their duties and saved the good citizens of Swellview.

"Yeah, you're right, sweet girl. Come help me block it up with all these boulders." He mumbled and they started to shift the rocks around the room so they'd form a protective bubble around the crack. They had to improvise with the old wooden planks lying around, which they used as prop shafts to keep the whole thing in place and it was a damn laborious task. Hauling the rubble around was nothing for Ray and his bulging biceps, but (y/n) was daintier than him and lacked his super strength. She lugged the final boulder into place with a heaving, panting groan, which prompted Ray to wrap himself around her so his hands could help to manoeuvre the boulder too.

*MATURE - YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED*

"Last one, sweet girl, and this leak is plugged." He whispered into her ear, making her very aware of how he was curled over her with his lips centimetres away from the sweet spot under her ear. Was he doing this on purpose?

"Ray..." She couldn't help but moan out when his hips slotted against hers, making her grind backwards so her scorching heat would find some relief against the rough material of his pants.

"What's the matter with you?" He asked, taken aback by her whiny tone, but that didn't mean he wasn't going to do anything about it. Far from it.

"Been needing you since yesterday. Won't let me have you." She whispered, screwing her eyes shut when the hand that wasn't preoccupied with keeping her tight against his chest slid from the boulder to her knee and then under her red, satin skirt. His fingertips stopped short of where she desperately needed them and he cruelly stroked the flesh of her thigh until she told him what he wanted to hear.

"Use your words, sweet girl." He growled, nipping at her earlobe, which tore a sharp gasp from her throat and she wasn't sure that she would be able to speak when the tip of his thumb brushed ever so slightly against her throbbing clit through her matching, red, satin safety-shorts and her panties. She jumped under the minuscule touch and whined when she felt the smirk against her neck.

"Tell me or I'll assume you don't want anything and I'll leave you alone." He threatened her darkly, feeling his own need growing by the second, but he lived for seeing her like this since he'd dreamt of it for so long.

"No...no....please, fuck me." She squeaked when his teeth sank into the tender skin of her neck and he relented on his teasing. Expert fingers stroked through her dripping folds, making her cry out when they glided from her clit so he could slip a finger inside her.

"Fuck, so tight...so wet, you needy little thing." He growled into her ear and she was eternally grateful for the arm holding her tightly to his chest as she was sure that without it, his touch would make her knees give out. 

"Shit, Ray...please, need you." (y/n) whined again when another finger joined the other, both of them working against her drenched walls as he angled his thumb to rub circles on her clit. He watched every facial expression, every moan that fell from her lips and decided that he wanted to hear and see more. 

"Fuck, stand up." He panted, feeling her needily roll her hips against his straining cock to stop him from moving away. The iron grip that yanked her upwards told her that he didn't like her disobedience, but she couldn't help but desperately clench around nothing when he left her core to throb.

"No, no, no. Fuckin' need you." She panted, clawing at his chest when he spun her around and picked her up by the thighs so her legs would wrap around his waist. She wanted the damn suit off but since they were technically still on a mission, it was too dangerous. Perhaps that was what she liked, the thrill of the adventure that shot straight to her pussy.

"Shit--why'd you have to do this to me now? Couldn't fucking wait, could you?" He nearly spat when her head falls to the crook of his neck and her tongue dashes out to run a stripe down the side of it. His hands squeezed her thighs hard enough to leave a mark that would fade instantly as he felt her blazing heat press against his throbbing length and a war waged in his mind; take what he wanted in this godforsaken mineshaft or be cruel and leave her and himself to wait for rescue, whenever that came. Seeing his internal battle, (y/n) decided that she'd help nudge his mind to the immoral side she was craving and tangled her fingers in his hair so she whisper into his ear.

"I'm sorry, captain. I've just been thinking about you and your fucking huge cock since yesterday, wanted you to fuck me so hard last night, but you wouldn't." She smirked when he released a tortured, strangled moan and he decided that even if he could convince her to wait for another two hours, he'd couldn't, not when he knew of the slickness between her thighs.

"Shit--you need to shut up. You need to be quiet, right now." He stressed, craning his head down so he could bite and suck at the flesh through the material at the top of her breasts. He wouldn't be able to release them from her bodice and it was another small form of torture that drove him wild.

"Could've touched me in the Man Van or anything." She whispered, throwing her head back and saying whatever came to mind as his lips roamed her collarbone and smooth skin. Feeling him bite at whatever he could reach gave her the biggest confidence boost; here was this all-powerful superhero that resisted even the wickedest of torture from his enemies, but with a kiss and a soft touch from her and he melted. Strong steel that bent for only her touch. "I would've let you, you can do anything to me and I won't mind."

"Shit," A snarl tore from his lips and his hips jerked upwards unintentionally at the idea. She knew what she was doing and loved to see his reaction. It was the truth, she'd take anything he'd give her and love it, mostly because it was exactly what she needed to stop burning. "Shit--I...shut up or I won't last, sweet girl." He grumbled, hands now squeezing her thighs so tightly, it was starting to hurt.

"Then fuck me and it won't matter. Want you to spill in me, so fucking deep." She purred into his ear, causing him to stride over to a particularly large rock that would do for her to bend over. Getting the hint, she wiggled out of his hold and wobbly stood on two legs before her hips were seized and she was folded over the rock so her elbows were holding up her body and he could flick her skirt over her ass.

"If you're so desperate, then keep those hands there and let me give you what I think you deserve." He grumbled and pulled her shorts and underwear over the smooth curve of her ass so he could see her glistening slit. She heard the sound of his zipper being pulled down and shivered when he bent over her so his back was flush against hers.

"Come on, you want it. Beg." Ray ordered, curling an arm under her body so two fingers could rest on her throbbing clit, but he wouldn't move, not even when his cock twitched as it brushed through her folds.

"Please, I've been good, I waited. Please, just fuck me...Captain." She whimpered, feeling how he was deliberately running the bulbous head against her folds to drive her insane. It was sneaky and his way of drawing those sounds from her lips, but the way she said his damn title, it was too much for him.

"F-fucking perfect little g-girl." He groaned and slowly sunk into her dripping entrance, making her fingers grasp the edge of the boulder as her insides tightened around him like a vice. Fucking finally, she had him and it seemed like he was just as desperate to move. His teeth sank into her shoulder, just as he pulled his hips back, only to slam them back against her ass with a harsh thrust. Even if he was reluctant to fuck down in the shaft at first, she could tell he loved it now. He loved the way her back was arching into him, he loved the way her pussy gushed when he breathed into her neck, he loved how the skin was stretched so tightly across her knuckles, it was turning white. 

"Fuck, f-fuck, is this what you n-needed, sweet girl? Just a little attention and my cock deep in your f-fucking soaked pussy? Hmm? Come on, you dirty little thing, tell me." He growled, creating a rhythm that was soul-shattering. It really shouldn't have felt that good, not when they were two-hundred and fifty feet under the Earth and possibly on the brink of death. His cock pushed against that spot inside her that made her see stars and a wildfire spread through her belly and down her thighs. Fuck, he knew how to ruin her, so when the fingers waiting on her clit started to jerk wildly, it came as no surprise. 

"Ray---Ray, shit, I'm almost there." (y/n) cried, feeling the heat sear through her muscles and her hips began to rock backwards to meet his wild thrusts. So nearly there, just a little more...

"Fuck, come on, sweet girl, give it to me." He panted and choked when she gripped his entire length so fucking tight that he had to still his movements to catch his breath. Her body went limp as he carried her through the waves of pleasure, the pressure on her clit never stopping, even when she was left jelly-like and sensitive. 

"Ray..." She moaned, trying to jutter her hips away from him, but a strong arm was crossed against her chest and she was pulled back and up to her feet, where he could trap her in his hold and make her take anything he wanted to do to her.

"One more, I want to see you cum one more time." He ordered, resuming the snap of his pelvis against her ass and he had access to her throat when her head fell back against his shoulder. He jackhammered into her, drawing his name from her like a prayer, one hand fondling her satin-covered breast and keeping her tightly against him as the other kept circling her clit. It was so damn debilitating, all of her sanity was wrung out of her body as she hurtled towards another release,  him hard and throbbing deep inside her as he chased his end too.

"If you want me to fuck you wherever the fuck I like, then I will. Show all those fuckers that want to flirt with you that you're mine." God, she could barely hear him over her endless moans, wails, and whimpers, but she did and it stole her breath away. She could listen to him all day, how he didn't want anyone else to fuck her the way he did, to know her the way he did, to love her the way he did.

"Fuck---'M yours, always. No one else's, just want you." She promised, clutching at the hand on her chest so he could feel the thundering of her heart.

"Yeah, that's right, no one else will never know how you taste or feel, all fucking mine, my sweet fucking girl." His eyes squeezed shut as his heart swelled at the sentiment. The words he'd waited years to hear, the feeling he'd only dreamed of ever experiencing, the girl he could never have imagined would let him do such terrible things to her in the dark, she was his.

"God, gonna cum again, Ray...shit." (y/n) whispered, her voice high-pitched and breathless as she felt the knot in her stomach tighten, making her claw at the arm on her chest. Ray felt her quivering walls around him and knew that her release was seconds away, causing him to speed up his thrusts until they were sloppy and without rhythm, but also brutally fast. He crushed her to his chest as he felt his own end approaching, but he wanted to feel her collapse first.

"Yes, fuck--yes, wanna feel it. Let me feel this fucking wet pussy cum around me again, little girl, Fuck, so sweet for me." He goes on, chasing her towards and over the cliff with his filthy words and suddenly, the cavern went fuzzy and dark as the blood rushed through her ears, her walls gripping around him for him to follow her. 

His hips don't stop, even when she's left boneless and he's the only thing keeping her up straight. All that left her lips was garbled "Iloveyou-Iloveyou-Ilove--", but it spurred him on, knowing that he was the only one who got to see how fucking beautiful and perfect she was in a post-orgasmic haze.

"Shit, I'm gonna cum, sweet girl." Ray moaned and gasped as the feeling crept up his spine and he daren't stop, not for anything. (y/n) could feel him hot and swollen, moving faster and faster and she knew that there was nothing she wanted more.

"Please, give it to me, fucking want your cum inside me." She moaned, feeling her walls flutter again at the impropriety of it, but she didn't care. She wanted to feel him leaking out of her all day, leaving her ready for later tonight when they'd inevitably go again because they couldn't get enough of each other.

"My girl, so fucking pretty, letting me fuck her so good, shit--I--I love you...so much." He choked, hoarse and deep as his hips faltered and he spilt deep inside her, drying up his words and leaving nothing but pure love for her on his mind. He pants in ragged breaths and his tight hold on her relents, allowing them to drop to the boulder to rest.

"I love you too...always." She giggled, turning in his arms so they could stand properly and she could give him a sweet, gentle kiss, nothing like the intense, wild sex they just experienced. His hands dropped down to pull her panties and shorts up over her ass again, making her blush when he squeezed her asscheek with a large palm. He'd be fucking half-hard all evening knowing his cum was slowly dripping through her folds, but it just left him all the more eager for when they returned home.

~Thirty minutes later~

*NOT MATURE (sorry for the filth)*

Well, after their heart rates had settled down and they giggled from the absurdity of it all, Ray plonked down on a small boulder and invited his cute girl onto his thigh. It was then that she realised how truly filthy they both were and made a mental note that it would have to be shower sex first and then whatever else later once they returned to the Man Cave.

To fight off the boredom, Ray had whipped out his little tablet and entertained them by playing one of the latest mobile games from the PearStore. His arms encompassed her waist and she laughed at his excitable enthusiasm for winning the game. He was such a child deep down.

"My God, this game's entertaining." He commented, pressing a kiss into her hair as he flicked his thumb over the control. She adjusted her position and leaned back into his chest, content to just lie back and rest after being drained of all her energy. Still, even if she was happy, he was getting antsy again; sure, he loved having the time to plough into her savagely, but he couldn't help but wonder when help was arriving. They'd been sitting doing nothing for half an hour, plus another half for when they were preoccupied, seriously, where was Henry? 

"Hey, Schwoz?" He picked up the radio and tried to call the lazy guy, who had managed to track down Henry at his school, sneak him out of class and send him to the mineshaft all with Miss Shapen noticing or his help. He much preferred to kick back and relax in an empty hideout.

"Go for Schwoz." He replied, mainly focused on what was happening on the screen in front of him since it was a lot funnier than Ray when he was looking for a round two.

"What's going on man? We sealed the gas leak, we've been stuck down here for over an hour now." Ray complained, (y/n) slipping off his knee so he could pace around the cave in frustration. She had to admit that being trapped was annoying, if slightly perilous, but she was feeling so much better than when she first entered, that she didn't really want to complain.

"Henry didn't get there yet?" Schwoz questioned, sitting up in his seat as he heard the troubling news. Huh, he would've thought that the kid would have been tunnelling them out of the mineshaft around about now, so it was worrying to hear that he hadn't even reached them.

"No, he didn't get here yet. Why would I be calling you if he didn't get here---ahhh!" Ray's harsh tone was interrupted as he was shoved forward by a giant drill bit smashing through the stone wall that he was resting on. He fell to the ground, making (y/n) dash over to him to help him up, even though Captain Man was always okay. So, that was where Henry got to.

"Ray? (y/n)? You in here?" The boy poked his head through the hole he made and peered through the darkness. Shit, he couldn't see anything, especially since his boss and his girlfriend were crouched down.

"Schwoz, we'll call you back." (y/n) said into the phone as she plucked it from the floor, snapping it shut before he could respond. She offered a dainty hand for Ray to take and he accepted it greatly so she could help him stand. Kind, sweet girl...

"Oh, hey. How you doin'?" Henry greeted them warmly, not seeing how irritated his boss was from being stuck in a hole with no feather mattresses in sight. He had a king-size one at home, the place he was desperate to return to after such a long day.

"Pretty good for a guy who just had a Tyson drill shoved in his back." The large man grumbled, rubbing at the spot where he was jabbed, not that it hurt anymore. He just wanted some fawning from his favourite girl.

"Aw, my poor baby." She cooed and cupped his face so she could caress his lips with hers. He was so brave, protecting her from the fall, helping her out in a way that only he knew, loving her always.

"Oh, god, stop. He's indestructible!" Henry groaned at their mushiness, screwing up his face in disgust. Honestly, they were the worst, always kissing, always snuggling, always doing things that he'd rather not have to look at. Geez, they'd had an hour to themselves, wasn't that enough?

"I'm still a person, with feelings," Ray replied curtly, briefly pulling away from the kiss so he could send Henry a scathing look. He ran his hands absentmindedly up and down (y/n)'s waist, loving it when his touch made her press against him even more.

"You can say that again." She purred, smirking and biting her lip when his ears and cheeks burned red and Henry audibly gagged and pretended to barf. Gross, gross, gross, gross, gross...

"Ugh, can we get going?! 'Cause I don't want to hear or see this and I really need to get back to school." He grumbled, making the young step back from her boyfriend since she knew that there was a better place and time. Namely, their shower and in about twenty minutes if all went to plan.

"All right, cranky-pants, we're coming. Pull me through." She told the boy, poking out her tongue at him after he mocked how much she loved her boyfriend and all the things he did to her. She offered the boy her hands and Ray lifted her waist so she was able to slide through the hole and into the digger, but not before Ray subtly pinched her ass and caught sight of her sticky thighs. Jesus, get him home, now.

"Me next." He said and gave Henry his hands just like (y/n) did and his sidekicks yanked him as hard as they could. Trouble was, it was incredibly difficult for a young boy and a small woman to take the weight of six-foot of pure, rock-hard, super-dense muscle. That, and his utility belt kept catching on the lip of the rock, making him whine as they struggled to get him moving. 

"Whoa! Whoa! Ray, have you gained some weight?" Henry asked, swearing that his boss never felt this heavy when they trained together and he had to flip Ray over his back. He had to lay off the won-tons.

"Hey, are you calling my boyfriend fat? Pull harder on your side!" (y/n) scolded the boy indignantly, feeling extremely protective over Ray and how he looked. He was goofy, silly, loveable and sexy and she was certain that if he had gained weight, it was muscle mass, not that it would make her love him even less.

"I think you gained weight." Henry disparaged, sneakily using Ray's famous temper to get him to wriggle through the gap even further. Ray would surely try to strangle him once he was in the digger, but at least they would have gotten him there.

"You take that back! I eat less than two thousand calories a day!" The superhero snapped, kicking his legs out like he was swimming in hopes of making it through. Being stuck so foolishly did make him feel a little chubby and Henry's goading wasn't helping. "Just suck it in!"

"Piss off, Henry!" (y/n) snapped, grabbing Ray's elbow and putting her heeled boot on the wall so she could it as leverage.

"God, this is so embarrassing," Ray grumbled, trying to his hips past the halfway mark, but they wouldn't budge. He just needed some encouragement, not putting down.

"Make it through and I'll give you a kiss, captain." (y/n) lowered her lips to his ear and instantly, he was forcibly jumping forward like a worm and with another harsh pull, he slid forward, landing in a heap in the ventilator shaft, on top of Henry as it were. 

"Oh, that hurt so bad." He grumbled, feeling his arms hurt as Ray pressed on them to get up. Why was he always the one took the bruises and pain? 

"Karma's a bitch." (y/n) deadpanned, pulling her boyfriend to her body to give him what he'd promised her.

~Swellview High~

So, they'd made it to Henry's school and things were all set for him to sneak back into class, disable this weird hologram of him that Schwoz had used to dupe the teacher and hand in his test like nothing had happened. There was a. catch though, of course, there was.

Sharona Shapen, the weirdest teacher in the school and the most desperate for the large cash bonus the good grades were gonna get her, was still prowling around the classroom and had caught onto fake Henry sitting and scribbling on his paper without listening. Time was up and every other kid had handed in their test paper (fully copied from Charlotte since she was a genius and Miss Shapen was turning a blind eye), meaning that hologram Henry sitting there blankly was starting to look real weird.

"You guys! You need to do something about Henry and Miss Shapen!" Charlotte hissed to Ray and (y/n), both of whom were still in uniform, plus Henry who was casually strolling through the halls like nothing was wrong. Thank god most of the kids had gone home by now or were still stuck in a late class, otherwise, their stealthiness would be in vain. 

"How? We need to get in there and distract her so I can turn off the hologram." Henry panicked, peering through the glass panel in the door and seeing how close his teacher was to sticking her fingers through his face and revealing the secret. 

"It has to be big! And something that will completely ruin her mind!" Jasper noted, trying to come up with everything Sharona Shapen liked, which stretched to cats and her freakishly large toe.

"Chicken?" Ray suggested, recalling that poor bird she'd annihilated on Valentine's Day when he'd been forced onto a date with her. Maybe he could dangle a chicken wing in front of her face and lure her away just enough for them to pull it off.

"Dude, where are we gonna get a chicken from?" Henry asked rhetorically, making Ray pipe down. Okay, chicken and any other food was a no-go, so what else did Miss Shapen dream of at night?

"Kiss her." (y/n) suddenly said in a grim voice, her eyes closed as she accepted that it was what they were gonna have to do. She idolised her boyfriend and fancied just as much as all the other women in Swellview did, meaning that a smooch from him would probably make her pass out long enough for them to swipe the hologram and test.

"What?" Ray, Henry, Charlotte and Jasper gasped and looked at her like she was crazy. First of all, that was their teacher, second of all, it wasn't just any teacher, it was Miss Shapen, third of all, Ray would never betray her like that, fourth of all, he repulsed the woman and so on and so on. There were a million reasons why that was crazy talk, but (y/n) just calmly breathed in and out.

"Look, a kiss from Captain Man will wipe her mind blank, meaning Henry can hand in his test with no problems." She explained, resting her hands on Ray's chest as his eyes bore into hers. Kiss someone else? He'd rather die, no one else would compare, especially not that old hag.

"Sweet girl, I can't kiss another woman, we'll think of something else. I love you and only you." He murmured, wrapping his hands around her wrists so he could bring one to his lips and kiss her gently thrumming pulse point. There had to be another way, one that didn't involve him breaking his endless faith and fidelity to her. He wasn't that guy anymore, he'd found his one and he didn't need nor want a bit of something on the side, she was everything he had ever dreamed of having.

"I know you do, but..." She started, sighing when she didn't know how to word it. She hated the idea of him kissing someone else, she loathed it even if it wasn't real and with Sharona, but she could overlook it just once if it was for an exceptionally good reason. "Look, I'm giving you permission this one time to march in there, look at her like you look at me and kiss her like you you mean it, so we can save Henry's butt." She said, giving him her sincerest gaze.

"How am I supposed to kiss her like she's you when she's not you? It's Miss Shapen, for god's sake." He groaned, pouting slightly at the idea of having to put his mouth on hers and pretend he was tasting honey. 

"Just imagine it. And when we get home..." She gestured for the kids to plug their ears and she leaned up to whisper against his neck. "You can fuck me again and again until I can't walk." 

"Fine." He agreed through gritted teeth and kissed his cheek in thanks. He fucking loved the sound of that and if he had to kiss that in the classroom to earn it, he would. 

"Kid, get ready to sneak in. I've got a Miss Shapen to kiss." He growled dramatically, tensing up his body like a true superhero. Henry nodded in understanding and stood next to the door so he could hear and look out for his cue. 

"Henry!!!" They could hear the teacher scream at the hologram inside and they knew that they had to act quickly.

Taking a deep breath and giving (y/n) one final peck, Ray yanked open the classroom door and boldly stood in the gap so she could admire his sudden entrance with awe. 'Just pretend she's (y/n), just pretend she's (y/n)' was all that was running through his mind.

"You." He greeted her in a tone that left his girl weak at the knees and if he squinted very hard and used the best of his imagination, she almost looked like (y/n). Almost.

"Captain Man!" She gasped at his sudden appearance. Oh my, he looked so handsome, better than she could ever have imagined and she was certain that this was a dream. The hero stormed over to her with a "hungry" look in his eyes, making her go breathless and weak at the knee. Sweet cheese, this wasn't happening; Captain Man seized Miss Shapen and dipped her in his embrace, leaning over her with a nauseous expression that he masked well. He just had to think of tonight and how his real love would be screaming his name.

"Do you consent to this kiss?" He asked in a tight, reluctant voice and cursed inwardly when her smile grew ten-fold. Well, that was a stupid question, of course, she wanted to snog Swellview's greatest hero.

"Sure, you want it in writing?" She joked, her eyes widening when he took the plunge and pressed his lips against hers. Dear, sweet lord, this was genuinely going to make him vomit. He'd kissed many people in his life and none of them but one truly gave him butterflies. Sharona Shapen was not that one; she killed the butterflies, burnt them, stamped on them, tore them apart. Her hands were roaming his back wildly and (y/n) looked in to see the abhorrent sight. 

"Go before I puke." She told Henry and the boy quietly tiptoed into the room. He too was disgusted by the sight of Ray kissing his teacher, mainly because she was a terrible kisser and not the one he'd fought so hard to set him up with. Ray kissing anyone but (y/n) would always look wrong, those two were made for each other.

He disabled the hologram, chucked it into his backpack and slid onto his chair, resuming the same position that it had been portraying; a pencil in his hand and a calm look on his face. Dear god, Miss Shapen giggling into the kiss was going to haunt his nightmares for weeks to come.

Okay, good. Henry was here, he was in the right place and just in the nick of time, which meant that for Ray, his work was over.

"Wait. Wrong woman." He said, suddenly pulling back and dropping Miss Shapen on the floor. His mouth tasted revolting and he made a quick exit for the door before she could claw him back for more.

"Let's get out of here." He mumbled, grabbing (y/n)'s wrist and pulling her through the halls rapidly. Charlotte and Jasper had already left and Henry could sort himself out, he just needed to leave and get home. 

"You're so brushing your teeth before you can kiss me again. I don't want to taste Sharona too." She chuckled, waggling her finger at him as his eyes darkened at the thought of kissing her. The right person.

"And then I get to fuck you?" He asked with hopeful eyes, glancing across to see her smirk and run her fingers through her hair like the seductive vixen she was.

"Until I can't walk." She promised, giggling when his legs started to work faster until they were practically running through the empty school corridors. Well, all's well that ends well, Henry had handed his test in without a hitch, Miss Shapen got to experience what a real relationship looked like and boy, Ray couldn't wait to get home.

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[doodle17]

Could you maybe tell us what future Raz and Lilis relationship is like now?

*vibrating with excitement*

Putting this under a read more because it might be really long hemngh

So I'd decided to study their characters and how they interact a little more (mostly from the second game, but a little bit of the first too) and think about how their relationship would develop as they got older.

I came to the conclusion that I want to portray them as two people who have some level of affection for the other, but don't have time to focus on being sappy "boyfriend and girlfriend" because of work. The "fun" part their relationship ended waaaay back when they were 18-ish and went from Junior Agents to Official Psychonauts. It ain't exactly easy to go on dates and save the world at the same time y'know, and both of them have a lot of personal stuff going on.

Raz is almost always busy. Constantly filling out paperwork, running around in Sasha's lab, doing agent stuff, Circus stuff, the WHOLE shebang. Lili, is still trying to get over her dad's retirement, as the while thing still feels very surreal to her. Not to mention Hollis and her dad trying to push her to become the next Grand Head, much to her dismay. It's not very easy to have a social life with that much going on to be 100% honest.

Theres also taking their very different personalities into account. Lili's "Fuck around and find out" and Raz's sticking to a solid plan type of methods tend to clash quite often, and many newcomers have a hard time telling whether or not they're dating or competing with eachother.

Lili is probably the most complicated woman Raz has ever worked with, and while he finds it endearing he also finds it incredibly exhausting. Sometimes, It feels like she'll do the exact opposite of what he tells her just to get a reaction out of him, out of spite. But it's not like she can help it. She absolutely hates being told what to do, and one of her least favorite things about Raz is when he decides to become "Mr. Boss man" and order everyone around during missions. Despite all of- that- however, they do end up having very successful missions!... Most of the time.

There's also the pressure to keep up professional appearances for their fellow agents and new interns. One thing the both of them can agree on, is that they'll avoid showing any PDA in front of their coworkers. They still cringe thinking about how a little too comfortable they were as kids, and how almost EVERYONE in the Motherlobe knew about it. Luckily, most of those people are retired, quit or fired, and gives the two a better chance to be a little more professional with their relationship in front of the newcomers, because if they have to hear, "You guys are like the next Sasha and Milla!" One more time...

This isn't to say that things are always rough and gloomy for them. They still have a very special connection, and after knowing eachother for half of their lives, it's not like they're going to get rid of the other anytime soon. So might as well make the most of it, eh? She'll never admit it out loud, but there's really no other person Lili would rather be tied up and dangling over a pool of pyrokenetic sharks with than Raz (which has actually happened before btw) There's no way you won't catch them holding hands or sneaking a quick kiss at least once.

Anyways, to sum all of this shishkabable up best I can: They're WAY too close to be considered "just coworkers", but they also have way too much going on to focus on a serious relationship at this time.

Good on you if you managed to read my nonsensical ramblings all the way through! Take a prize from the prize bin you deserve it 👏 👏👏

#I hope this makes sense- #It's like 1am rn and I kind if blacked out while writing this #I was on a roll for a hot minute #Feels kind of nice to have a creative ruch again since art hasn't been doing it for me recently #Anyways allow me to ramble some more in my tags now that I'm conscious again #I hope I managed to get my take on their relationship clear #I don't dislike razlili #I LOVE razlili #It's one of my comfort ships they're so stinkin cute #And as much as I love sappy future Raz and Lili #I want to try and focus on a more realistic and slightly dramatic take #AT LEAST IN MY EYES #I want to explore their business relationship as well as their romantic one #So why not do a mixture of both amiright #The only people who ever see the two of them “together” are the (previous) interns or the Aquatos #Also the old superstar agents like Sasha Milla etc. #But yeah #Idk im tired #doodles rants #psychonauts #psychonauts 2 #razputin aquato #lili zanotto #anon babble #Razlili #Psychonauts future

[justatalkingface]

The UA Entrance Exam

This was going to be part of a larger post about UA as a whole, but I decided this was probably best to stand alone, because this is more random thought/opinion than a proper critical post. Welcome to what is probably going to be a controversial post: the UA Admissions test isn't bad?

The main argument against it is that it puts those without a combat quirk at a disadvantage, right? And, well, that's true. But... is that wrong?

Here's the thing: the more heroism as a whole is developed in the setting, the more something becomes startling clear, one simple fact that stands above all others.

Heroism is a profession defined by fighting.

You can be a rescue hero, you can spend your time saving people from collapsing building or finding those who are lost, but if you've gotten to the point of being a professional hero? You know how to throw down.

I'm not even talking about UA, here: there's a license exam that everyone has to take, as part of a process of being a hero. Half of it is saving people, yes... but the other half? It's purely about fighting other people. Hell, even part of the saving people portion has combat aspects, since it's focused around, not just saving people, but saving people while under attack.

I'll say it again: if you are a hero, you are a fighter, by definition.

So, what's that have to do with the UA entrance exam? In all honesty, that exam is functionally a simulation of running around a city, beating up random street thugs. It's testing if you can beat people up, one of the most fundamental parts of heroism (deadpan stare).

The follow up point is, what about Quirks that aren't combat focused, but are still useful for heroism? Shinso, for example? If those were actual people, he probably could have beaten them, right? That's unfair!

And, I'll admit, that's right; in the context of that exam, it is unfair, because some people can vomit lava lasers and some can't. Is Brainwash useful? Absolutely. Counterpoint: what is day one Shinso going to do if he meets some guy in an alley with no mouth and a knife?

Die.

Literally, if he didn't run away, all he'd do is die.

Everyone who passed, and quite a few who didn't pass, could take down Wannabe Slenderman, while Shinso would just end up dead in that alley. This is going to sound bad, but life is unfair, and if you're going to go around picking fights with dangerous people and not prepared for that fact, you will pay for it.

Now, let me introduce you to Chad Hagakure.

In the grand scheme of things, while Toru has a useful support power, Shinso's is a lot better than hers, more versatile, more powerful. You can, in the words of Ollivander, do great things with a power like that. While Toru's Quirk gives her some advantages against the robots, it isn't going to beat them for her, either, and the off button idea is fanon with no canon backing.

So how did she get in, with her inferior quirk, when Shinso didn't?

Because Shinso coasted through his life with only his Quirk, and then was helpless when met up with something with the amazing ability to shut up. Everything he did, before Aizawa took him under his wing, revolved around making the other person talk, and absolutely nothing else. Toru, meanwhile, found opponents her invisibility couldn't magically destroy for her, and responded by beating them to death.

You probably think I'm being dramatic or something, but I'm not kidding. You need to stop robots to get points to pass; Izuku is the only person to pass on rescue points only, canonly. She doesn't have a power or tools to let her restrain them like Minoru did, so she had to, had to, break them. She doesn't have laser beams, or fire blasts, or anything to make it easy for her; all Toru had was the ability to ambush things, her muscles, and maybe a rock or a steel plate or something she picked up along the way.

That's all she had... and then she managed to kill her way in the heroism course anyways, past people who probably had Quirks much more compatible with the problem at hand. She went up to robots, probably from behind, and then hit them until they stopped moving.

In other words, Toru went into the Entrance Exam... and then the Doom music kicked in.

At the end of the day, though, I'm saying all these things, and while they're true, I feel like I'm dancing around the fundamental point: being a hero is about more than just a Quirk.

As a setting, MHA is one with a broad set of powers and abilities, by design. It means that there's lots of cool and interesting people to meet, which is the point, but on a practical level, it also means that every Quirk, every Quirk, has something that counters it. For support Quirks especially, there's seemingly always that One Simple Trick to beat them; a pair of thermal goggles, for example, renders Toru Quirkless. If you just don't talk, Brainwash is useless. And when that happens, you can't just say, 'Time out!' and get a new villain; you'll have to fight them anyways.

If you depend on your one special trick and nothing else, one day that will be your downfall.

UA has a lot of questionable decisions in it, about it, around it, but it is good at teaching its students how to beat the living shit out of people; you could even say it specializes in it. It has no illusions about the reality of the job it's preparing them for. And in the same vein, this isn't something that should be a surprise to any applicant; almost every time we see a hero in the media? They've just finished fighting someone. If they're not entering UA with wide open eyes about what they're going to have to do (and probably after signing some liability waivers to boot), then frankly they're idiots.

The Entrance Exam, mostly, tested one simple thing: are you ready to fight someone? Are you ready to walk into that alleyway and beat those thugs into submission? It's easier for people with combat Quirks, yes, because those are Quirks that are good at fighting, but that's not the end all; in another life, if he had worked out before hand, if he was determined to win, even if he was at a disadvantage, Shinso could have walked in, picked up a piece of rebar, and just hit things until he passed.

Like, let's compare Shinso and Bakugou: both of them have a good Quirk, and both of them knew it. (I know fanon and the narrative say otherwise, but Shinso has had nothing but praise from the flashbacks we've seen, with only a few comments that were somewhat negative but still held implicit respect for his Quirk and it's powers. Everyone he talks to says he has a good Quirk. He's happy using his Quirk. He is not the fanon abused little racoon.)

Shinso accepted that as fact and walked into UA without putting any work in, from what we can see (he faced Izuku, who was effectively Quirkless, and the second his Quirk failed he panicked and basiclly flailed more than fought, still only trying to make Izuku talk rather than actually beat him in a fight, even though Izuku was right there, about to beat him in a fight, and prepared to avoid his Quirk) and was smacked down accordingly.

Then we look at Bakugou, and that's the thing with Bakugou: he had an easy road to heroism, and knew it. I've said this somewhere before, but Hori leans on 'Bakugou works hard' as an excuse to not talk about his moral failings, because he does work hard, but not that hard. 'Bakugou working hard', in all honesty, is peak 'Tell not Show', and is repeated so damn often I'm sick of it.

The thing is that the idea of that isn't wrong, just the execution of it. With his muscles, with the way his Quirk is supposed to work, he had to put work into bulking up, staying in shape. He didn't just get his Quirk and say, 'I'm set for life', he fought for it. And while Hori praises him like Rock Lee when we barely see him do shit, the idea of a talented person working hard anyways could have been great. It's something you see in a lot of shonen manga, and is emblematic of heroism itself, and the spirit that UA is supposed to show: you can't just coast into heroism. You need to fight for it, earn it.

...I got a bit off topic there, but the point is the kid didn't just manifest those muscles out of the ether, he has to be training off screen, even if we should be seeing it more on screen.

Bakugou had a good Quirk, but was willing to train himself to achieve his goals.

Toru has a, honestly, medicore Quirk, but still managed to fight her way to her dreams.

Shinso has a good Quirk, but his only strategy when his Quirk failed him was, 'try harder to get them again with my Quirk!'.

Heroism is about power, true, but it's also about attitude, willingness, determination, the ability to perform under pressure and to make good choices and act on them, all the things that got early Izuku through the series before he got Full Cowl, often without using his Quirk at all. Most of that, if not all of it, can be trained over time, true... But if you're not born lucky, and you're not willing or able to work out enough, to think cleverly enough, or to be vicious enough to smash some weak robots, then honestly you're probably not ready for the hero course.

#bnha critical #mha critical #shinsou critical #oddly bakugou less critical #but still critical #the chad hagakure #toru in the entrance exam is when the Doom music kicks in #heroism is about more than just a quirk #this is ironically why shinsou failed