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#I mean if Jesus turned water into wine...
babbeldumpsterfire · 9 months
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i’m still not over the fact that Aziraphale and Crowley have been drinking & refilling the same wine bottles for decades. Like, they let the alcohol stream into their veins, their systems, processing it, making them drunk af, and then whatever that wine became in their bodies goes straight back into the bottle. I just... I am very sorry for whomever gets offered any kind of beverage in Aziraphale’s bookshop.
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nrmlgrl32 · 5 months
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i love jesus not in a devout christian way but in a way that can only be described as chronic mitski listener
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nocylipcowa · 8 months
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i also made wine in my water bottle????
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thepradapariah · 2 months
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Mars ☄️ and Your Sexxx Language 🐱💋✨
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QUICK MESSAGE TO THE BADDIES
HELLO!!!! To all of my sweet, sweet Kosmic Baddies, Oh!! How I’ve missed you!
I cannot believe it’s been over a FRIGGIN year, but GOODNESS….believe me, when I say this past year has been a roller coaster for me, I truly mean it. I can only imagine what’s been going on in your lives as well. Just TOO MUCH!!!1111!!!!!111!!!!!1 But welcome to 2024! A universal 8 year and the year of the Dragon!!! WE IN THIS THANNNNGGG!!!! Hard work, discipline and accountability is the theme, and we can’t lose!!!!!
Believe it or not, I actually STARTED writing this to have to you for Halloween, but ummmm….this is looking like a Valentine’s Day post instead! HA!!!! Blame it on my Saturn in Pisces– my relationship to time is….non existent. But, I think this timing is better anyways. The theme is very fitting so we are going to turn apples into oranges.
***Even funnier update, now it’s past Valentine’s Day….GOODNESS!!! This has been the longest it’s taken me to write anything. Like…INSANE. Almost 6 months I’ve been steadily working on this!
Thank you to those who have continued to support me! Thank you to those who have continued to share and interact with my post through my…let’s say, hiatus! I am planning to put more energy and effort into this blog post. I LOVE writing for y’all, it is really one of my favorite things in the world.
I am going to take a moment to apologize in advance and say, the typos are probably going to be real with this one. Because I’ve been working on it for so long, I’m just ready to get it out, so it won’t be my cleanest work. I will probably be updating and editing, so bare with me!
🕯 INTRODUCTION 🕯
Sooooo….where to start? I wanted to do something fun and interesting this go round because I missed y’all so much, but I also wanted to do something light so I could get back into the rhythm of writing again….aaaaaaaaaand I thought you would enjoy something a little smexiiiii as we move into cuddle buddy season. So, in this post, we are going to talk about Mars and Your Sexxx language.
One day, as I was driving around town, it dawned on me that we always talk about Love Languages (check out my Mercury post if you haven’t already) and we never talk about sex languages. And y’all know me, and if you don’t know, you’ll soon find out, I am a Bharani moon (atmakaraka at that); and the blending between Mars and Venus is my soul’s most valuable asset to share with the world…(Did I mention my moon is the 11th House?) Sex is one of the most taboo topics (in Western puritan culture, at least), yet such a powerful resource in our human tool box and it’s ridiculously important in our relationships. The 7th House is followed by the 8th House for a reason. Intimacy, of course not always sexual, is what leads to self-discovery, the 9th House. So we cannot overlook the important step that is sexual relations. Even the word “orgasm” means “little death” and death baby, is as close as you get to God. (See how those houses flow together so well?) Hence why things such as Tantra are a sexual AND religious experience all in one. Don’t be fooled by western/christian ideals into thinking that sex is unholy or ungodly. If you think Jesus was a virgin, think again. I mean, what’s the point of turning water into wine if you’re just going to roll over and go to sleep? Y’know what I mean?
Don’t worry! If you’re a less experienced reader, and haven’t engaged in aaaaallll thhhaattt… this post is still for you! In fact, this is one of the reasons I love astrology so much, because hopefully this post will give you some context about yourself and what your SOUL craves, not just your body, so when you do start “doing the do” you can be spiritually comfortable with your wants and desires instead of ashamed or even afraid of them.
Not to put all my business on the street…but, hey, I love y’all, so I won’t keep too many secrets from you (mercury in the 8th, HA)…but, I had to do quite a bit of bumping and grinding to discover what my soul needs in an intimate relationship and I wish there was more of “guide” for me on that journey! So HERE…I’m giving it to you!
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WHAT IS A SEX LANGUAGE? 😈
To be completely honest, a “sex language” isn’t something as defined as a love language, so please, bear with me as we discover this together. Please feel free to share any experiences or insight with me. Although I may not always respond, I TRULY appreciate you taking the time to share with me. I try to read everything that I can!
I’m defining sex language as how one creates and shares intimacy in their close relationships. This is particularly expressed through physical interactions and outward expressions. Mars is a planet that governs our passions, drives and desires, meaning our sex language is guided by what we deeply want and crave from our partners on a spiritual level. Venus represents more of the external notions that we have for love and relationships, while Mars represents our internal needs from love and relationships. Mars is inherently a more personal and “self-centered” planet, so interestingly enough, your sex language is all about you! I go as far to say, when you find a partner, don’t forget to check your Mars compatibility as well. If you have extremely incompatible Mars signs, you will have to do a lot more work in the relationship to overcome the constant friction. Moreover, if you have more compatible Mars signs, then WOOOO BABY, the sexual tension could be off the charts!
✨ ABOUT MARS ✨
Mars placements won’t make or break a relationship, per say, but it is a very important layer to help maintain a relationship. How many of you have heard of sexless marriages and people being unsatisfied in their relationships in a sexual way? Does that mean the couples always break-up because of the lack of sex or chemistry? No…..But does it help a HECK OF A LOT when you are wildly attracted to your partner? YES! (Of course this isn’t always a good thing…but for the sake of this post, we are only talking about rainbows and sunshine.) Just keep this in mind as you start to use this knowledge in your journey. Mars is a really important planet that is easy to overlook because it’s not in the Big Three! (Yet, it iiissss the natural ruler of the 1st House).
WHY IT ALL MATTERS 🌚
I truly believe there is a shift in the collective and many couples are going to be coming into union over the course of the next year or so. Why? Because Ketu is FINALLY transitioning out of Libra and entering Virgo. If you’ve noticed, we’ve seen quite a bit of celebrity break-ups and covid relationships coming to a screeching halt. Hence why I say, if you’ve been single, or haven’t been in a serious connection in the last few years or even ever, now is the time that your next partner might be going through some significant ending with an ex. Union is on the horizon for a lot of souls who have been doing theeee spiritual work. That’s why I couldn’t think of a better topic to get started to set the mooooooooood. Bow-chicka-wow-wow.
So without further ado, let’s get into the nitty gritty. I’m going to do something different and start with Mars in Pisces/12th House and work backwards to Mars in Aries/1st House! I thought “Hey! Why not switch it up a bit? Pisces shouldn’t be forced to scroll ALL the time!”
***Note: If you’re feeling extra spicy, you can read for whatever sign is in your 1st House and 8th House as well because those are traditionally Mars ruled Houses. And you can read for your 12H, because the 12H is also the house of bedroom pleasures! Always keep in mind that we are complex creatures and astrology is like a puzzle, so it’s okay for some things to resonate and other things to not. Learn as many perspectives as possible so you can define yourself!
With Love & Lust,
Enjoy!
A-D 💋
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Mars in Pisces/Mars in the 12th House
“Cut me like a rose, turn me like a beast” Only- Ry X
If your natal Mars is in Pisces or the 12H, you may actually have a hard time knowing what your desires are. Why? Because Mars can feel as if it’s drowning in the deep spiritual waters of Pisces. Your wants can be quite dreamy. You crave a sexual experience that transcends space and time, forcing you to leave your body and touch God himself in ecstasy. (I’m a western Mars in Pisces, so…I get it). When it comes to your sex language, you want your partner to just get “you”. You don’t want to have to explain or talk or direct, you’d rather just receive and give a special type of unconditional love that knows no bounds. Because of this “boundless love”, you may actually, literally, lack boundaries. This doesn’t have to be a bad thing, so we are going to focus on the positive. You are truly accepting of those who are accepting of you. Because Pisces is a mutable sign, you are willing to fit into whatever box your partner wants to put you in…and you receive great pleasure from making a deep seeded fantasy of your partner come true. You could be just as playful and imaginative when it comes to role-playing as a Gemini.
Because Mars is in Pisces or the 12H, you’ll find that a lot of partners will project their wishes and dreams onto you. Hence why you want a love that is really deep, because people can get washed away in the shallow end of your energy without ever fully realizing how deep your waters flow. This can be frustrating. And because Mars isn’t the most comfortable here, you can have some unhealthy ways of expressing your sexual frustration. Particularly if your Mars is in the 12H, you can be attracted to self-gratification through self-pleasure and also self-harm. You may even conflate the two, harm & pleasure, and have a dark side to your sexual fantasies. Your passions and desires can end up being repressed because people may not understand them, or be able to meet your high expectations. Amd babes, I love you, but just know, your expectations out of partnership are OTHERWORLDLY. But no worries!! You are SUPER DUPER freaky and almost a guaranteed partner that will go down in history books, particularly after you get comfortable in your own sensuality.
One of the things to watch out for with this Mars, is you can be passive-aggressive in the bedroom. You can take a more passive role, expecting and energetically demanding that your partner take the lead. You may not realize you even give off this energy, but the internal need that you have to dissolve into your partner, like sugar into water, can be very intense. And the gag is, sugar doesn’t really fully dissolve, so what you’re seeking can be impossible to satisfy on the earthly plane. Because of this, it is IMPERATIVE for you to have spiritual outlets within your sexual connections. It may be that you and your partner practice Tantra, or you simply pray together. With this Mars, you can absolutely use sex as a tool for manifestation. Watch your thoughts during sex, because you truly can create MAGIK!
Mars in Aquarius or Mars in the 11th House
“I believe in aliens, I don’t believe in love” Familiarity by Teezo Touchdown
If your natal Mars is in Aquarius or the 11th House, you are something special. Why? Because out of all the signs, you are the most unique lover. I KNOW!!! How friggin’ cliche, Aquarius=Unique, blah blah blah…boring. YES! It’s said all the time, but it’s the truth. In Vedic Astrology, it is important to note that Aquarius is ruled by Saturn and Rahu. This is hugely impactful as to why you are unlike anyone else. Even as you read this, you won’t be exactly like the next person reading this, because the Saturn Rahu combination can be influenced by so many different factors. Aquarians are the hardest sign to write for in general, simply because you are going to be very individualist when it comes to how you express yourself. Now, all that being said, you still crave, very deeply, a sense of belonging. So please, don’t ever take for granted how special you are. If someone is lucky enough to break through your hard exterior, they really are in for an extraterrestrial experience!
Because Mars is in an air sign here, you may or may not be the most sensual and/or sexual person on the planet. You could be. But you could not be. And that is the gift…or curse…of this Mars placement. I have Mars in Aquarius myself, and I remember reading an article that said “this placement can be infuriating to your partner because you are so nonchalant.” And I can definitely say I’ve lost relationships because the other party assumed I was disinterested because I wasn’t the most expressive when it came to my emotions. It’s important to remember that Mars in Aquarius/11H is actually a neutral placement. It isn’t a death sentence or the worst thing on the planet, but it’s not necessarily the best. So don’t be too hard on yourself if your partners don’t understand you very easily. You will just have to do more work to learn how to communicate and accommodate in your relationships. This may be something that follows you throughout life…and forget your partner….it could be infuriating to you! BUT NO WORRIES! Mars in Aquarius or Mars in the 11th house is usually more concerned with developing and nurturing friendships, which seems to contradict the more lustful side of Mars. Longing for friendship and connection versus longing for sensual pleasure and connection can be seen as two different things.
What Mars in Aquarius/11H wants more than anything is L. O. Y. A. L. T. Y. Because this Mars placement can grant so much freedom, it is imperative for the person with this placement to feel safe and secure in the sexual relationship they are building. This is NOT to be confused with possession. Expecting loyalty from a partner isn’t the same as feeling as if you own your partner. You believe that your partner should have freedom to express and live their life the way they want to, and you expect the same in return. However, you do expect your partner to consider you when they make their decisions in life. It is very much “give a dog a bone, leave a dog alone, let a dog roam and he’ll find his way home” (S/o DMX, may he rest in peace). Meaning, in your sexual language, you want your space and privacy, but you want to feel a belonging no matter how far away you are from your partners.
NOW, for the fun stuff. You are one of the most explorative lovers on the planet. You may have a “the more the merrier” type attitude and be interested in group smexii time or oragies. You may have a dream to experience Amsterdam and the Red Light District. The beauty in having your Mars in an air sign/house is that you can remain detached from the sexual experience and partner– therefore, you may not experience jealousy because you aren’t super possessive. Again, you’re all about freedom baby!!! You may also have some pretty “far-out” kinks. You may be interested in different genders, or same gender, or mix gender or no gender or latex or pantyhoes or dress up or furries or hentai or tentacle porn….and if you’re not into it, chances are you will at least click a questionable link or two. You don’t carry the same shame as others do when it comes to what turns you on sexually. You don’t like anything boring or too routine, so your search history could be a bit…odd….BUT HEY!!! As long as it’s not hurting anyone or anything and pleasure is being derived from all parties involved, then let adults do what adults do is kind of your attitude.
Friendship is the key to your heart…and to your…uh…biological box….lol. When it comes to long-term relationships, I can bet my bottom dollar that you’re far more interested in the friendship aspects than the inherent relationship drama. When your friends ask “why are you still dealing with them”, you will follow up with “well, we are friends before anything else.” And you mean that deeply. The really funny thing is…on the other hand, you are also very likely to get down with complete strangers and never think about it again. You can hook-up and detach with the best of them, or your loyalty to a confidant can keep you in a relationship for a very long time…it. Just. depends.
The one thing that is true about your sex language, is that you speak ALL different kinds. When you look back at your life and your experiences, if you are more of an adventurous Aquarian, lets say you have a lot of air and fire in your chart, you will most likely have all kinds of stories from all different people and places. You will be one of the most interesting partners and friends to talk to about all the mixed bags of experiences that you’ve had..which is awesome. If your Mars in Aquarius/11H is paired with a more “earthy” sign or even water, you will most likely have a rom-com type love thing happening…that tugging “will they/won’t they” energy at the beginning of relationships, only to fall head over heals with the “guy/gal next door”. You may also find your sexual partners online, in a group setting or be hooked up by natural friends. “How’d you meet?” “Oh, I heard from a friend of a friend that that d*ck is a ten out of ten!”
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Mars in Capricorn or Mars in the 10th House
“My vicious love, My lethal heart, I wanna screw you up into me” - Bad Bad Bad by Ramsey
If your natal Mars is in Capricorn or in the 10th House, then your sexual language is money, money…and….uh….more money. I kid, I kid…but not really. It would be easy and predictable for me to say you just lust after money, but it goes much deeper than that. Believe it or not, Mars is actually exalt in Capricorn, so, you couldn’t have a better Mars placement. Your natural ruler Saturn and Mars truly are the best of friends. And if you’re familiar with Tarot, then you know The Devil represents Capricorn energy and The Devil is all about seduction and temptation. Unlike some of the more dreamy Mars placements like Pisces/12H or Cancer 4H that use their sexual language as an escape from reality, or the detached air placements like Gemini/3H or Aquarius/11H, who are too aloof to harness Mars’ energy, YOU my Capricorn/10H individuals are acutely aware of how powerful the nature of sex can be…and most importantly, how it can be used to your advantage.
To the average person on the street, you may not seem like the super sexual type. You prefer a sophisticated lover to a “cute” one, so people can assume that your standards are too high. And perhaps, your standards are high, because you understand the value of your presence and your time. In fact, you HATE wasting time, so why would you waste time on lovers who don’t bring anything to the table? Sadly, for most of the public, they won’t ever have the experience to be with a Capricorn/10H Mars because quite frankly, they can’t afford it.
Funnily enough, I’m sure as you’ve been reading this, you’re like “dang…am I that shallow?” And the answer is yes and no. You’re shallow because we live in a shallow world– and you know in order to survive it, you have to use what you got to get what you want. The other side of this is, you’re not shallow at all because you are willing to work and discipline yourself and sacrifice for those that you truly care about. There is such a depth to you in the long run, that it makes sense that you make it really difficult for people to get to you. Because you know and I know, once you’ve committed to someone, you’ve committed for as long as you possibly can. Your sexual language is all about stamina and endurance. This is true in and and out of the bedroom. As an earth sign/house, you are a sensual being. You enjoy each and every bit of romance that you can get. A nice meal, some good perfume, dressed to the nines is all considered foreplay to you. You entice your partners with a certain dignified class and only the brave will approach. In your younger years, you could find this extremely frustrating at times because men will really have to get their sh*t together before they can even THINK to approach you on that level. But the more that you use your Mars to get you where you want to be in life, partners will follow behind you and constantly buzz around as if you are the Queen Bee and they are mere workers for your attention.
Funnily enough, you are quite the heart-breaker with this Mars placement. Because you are so focused on your goals outside of love, and yet, you can crave sensual pleasures, you will be very direct with a partner, but they may not be aware of how serious you take yourself. How can this manifest? Let’s say you meet a partner and everything is groovy, but you are working on a big project for work, you’re working on a degree of some kind, or you’ve said you won’t rest until you make partner at the big company…unlike other Mars placements, you won’t let romance sway you or take you off track. You are probably the best example of “right person, wrong time”. You don’t have as much of an issue as other signs walking away from a situation that is distracting you from your more worldly desires. This can leave people utterly confused, because you seem like a perfect partner, but honestly, you’re just not focused on aaaalll the drama that can come with fully committed relationships. People may actually take this energy and say that you’re a player…or worse…a floozy (one of my favorite words lol, definitely needs to make a comeback). You actually aren’t. You will be one of the most committed partners they could find, but if it’s not the right time…it just ain’t happening. So your partners will have to maintain some level of patience or they will miss out. On the other hand, because Mars is a planet of extremes, you may go through periods in life where you are celebate. It may take you awhile to stop channeling that Martian ambitious energy into your career and put it towards your sexuality. That being said, you will enjoy the more sensual side of sex. You could have great stamina and endurance. Because sex may not come around as often as you’d like, you will learn to savor every drop of your partners and please them in a calculated, thoughtful and masterful way! How smeeexxxiiiiiii!!!!!
Mars in Sagittarius or Mars in the 9th House
“I’ve been everywhere, man, looking for someone. Someone who can please me, love me all night long” Where Have You Been by Rihanna
If your natal Mars is in Sagittarius or the 9th House, your sexual language is that of many languages. You fall in love with the exotic, unknown and unexplored. You like your partners like James Bond likes his cars– foreign. You appreciate partners who expand your understanding of reality. Your partners have to expand your mind…and body…into positions that you never thought were possible. If you don’t attract partners who are of a different race, culture or class from you, then you will be attracted to partners who are otherworldly and spiritual or are just as serious about their religious beliefs as you are. Like Mars in Pisces/12H, your planet is ruled by the planet Jupiter, aka Guru. You NEED to learn from your partner. You NEED to explore with your partner. And you NEED to be able to teach your partners something as well. “I wanna know…can you show me…I wanna know about the strangers like me”...It’s giving…Tarzan and Jane. I have Mars in the 9th House, and it has manifested in a very fun way! So with my bias, I believe that this can be one of the more fun placements if you just go with the flow. Unlike other Mars placements, you don’t necessarily feel the need to control your partners. You’d much rather experience them, learn the lesson and move on to the next new shiny thing. Much like your brother, Gemini, you are equally as invested in getting the knowledge and seeking more knowledge. You of all signs are unlikely to overstay your welcome in a relationship. You can come off quite restless and unsatisfied…UNLESS you are just fascinated and enamored with an individual.
You can find yourself attracted to people who have accents, or speak a different language than you. But you will be even more turned on by someone who shares the same religious beliefs as you. You may actually be willing to convert religions for your partner OR, and this is more likely, you have a partner who is a different religion than you are, and instead of being ashamed by it, or making it an obstacle, you embrace it– ultimately respecting their religion, while maintaining the traditions of your own.
You will naturally desire to travel with your partner. Making some of your favorite memories in life when you made-love in some far off land. If the sentence, “I made love to a Frenchman I met while eating a baguette at the local cafe under the Eiffel tower and I’ll never see him again, but he’s the love of my life” turns you on…congratulations, you’re in the right spot.
This Mars placement is fueled by your deepest desire to see the world and its deepest truth, and then just imagine how much you can learn about the world through the lens of an intimate partner. Your sexual language, like I said earlier, involves language in and of itself. You want to hear the stories of distants lands, fascinated by the foreign nature of your divine counterpart. You will want to be intimate with partners who can speak for hours and hours about their adventures and endeavors. You need to be intrigued at the very least.
I also find that with this placement, there may be an age difference in your relationships. You either will be attracted to someone who is much older and wiser, OR, interesting enough, you could find yourself with someone younger. Why is this? You will appreciate a person who still has zest for life. You will be equally attracted to partners who are bright eyed and bushy tailed! Plus, I know I’ve talked a lot about your partner entertaining and teaching you, but the truth of the matter is, you will want to be as much of a sage to your partner as well. You will enjoy teaching them the ways of life and the pursuit of happiness. They will look to you with eyes of wonder as you paint beautifully vivid pictures of your life experiences that have shaped your view of the world.
Another element to this Mars placement, is you are one to challenge authority. This may manifest in your sex language by liking to explore BDSM culture in some way. Because this Mars is all about freedom, you may be turned on by the thought of your partner controlling you…just so you can say no. You can come off as a “well, make me”...kind of lover when it comes to foreplay. You love a challenge and you like partners who challenge you in some way when it comes to living out your sexual fantasies. Another way this may come out is you AND your partner may have a knack for getting into trouble or enjoying sex with some kind of risk involved. You get off being able to sneak away for a quickie. You’ll have sex in the backseat of a car. Joining the mile club is definitely on your bucket list…all the things! Because you are such a rebel, you tell stories that have “normies” clutching their pearls and leave their mouths open. You want to have memorable sex that is worth writing a book about!!!
I can not drive home enough how spiritual your sexual relationships have the potential to be. You are not a shallow lover. You are a lover full of wonder and full of lust…wanderlust…if you will. Sagittarius/9H is a very serious zodiac/house. You're destined to seek truth– so your sexual partners HAVE to enlighten you in some way. You don’t want to get stuck in the mundane, boring stuff of a relationship, (and please, don’t get too carried away, because we do live on planet earth!) you want to experience shrooms, talk about God and make love in the forest! Smexxiiii!!!!
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Mars in Scorpio or Mars in the 8th House
“Every breath you take, every move you make, every smile you fake, every single day, I’ll be watching you” Every Breath You Take by Sting
Okay, okay, it would be all too easy to say your love language is stalking, and more stalking and even more stalking, but…that’s only a small fraction of what this Mars placement has to offer. If your natal Mars is placed in Scorpio or in your 8th House, your sexual language is that of raw passion and intensity. That being said, it is also about restraint and self-restriction, and sometimes self destruction. I tend to find Scorpionic energy and 8H energy to be radically internal. You, actually, may not be the most expressive lover. You are more comfortable waiting, studying and planning to pursue a lover, rather than going in full force. Because Mars is your natural ruler, Mars is more than comfortable here, but unlike your brother sign, Aries, you are more of the “planning” part of war, rather than action. This is the strategy of self-defense more than anything. You don’t want to walk into an intimate situation to be intimate yourself, you want to extract vulnerability from your partner like a detective solving a murder crime. Your sex language is more of a riddle than a question. And you would like a partner who intrigues you and leaves a lot of mystery. In my many many years of dating, and many many encounters with Scorpionic energy (I attract them like flies…it’s crazy) I always find that Scorpios are nowhere near as mysterious or hard to figure out as they perceive. Behind all that black and dark stares and gazed is usually a pretty pretty boring, but shy person. There is such a caution with this sign when it comes to acting on those very deep and sometimes all consuming desires, so you are very careful to not put yourself in harm's way. Another hot take that I have on this placement that may seem a bit contradictory to the Scorpionic stereotype is YES YES YES, you are smexxxxiiii and all of the things, but that doesn’t necessarily make you the most sexual person. You take intimacy and sexy very seriously, more seriously than most, because for you intimacy and vulnerability can be used against you and be seen as a weakness, so you are hard pressed to just be going around willy-nilly swinging from partner to partner. You also view sex/intimacy as more of a “power” thing than a “love” thing. And what do I mean by that? You know that deep intimacy and truly being intertwined with another individual gives you an unreal amount of access to that person on a personal and spiritual level. It is always important to remember where Scorpio/8H lines up in the grand scheme of things. It follows the Libra/7H of partnership. The 8H is actually the house that dictates how a relationship will play out. This. Is. Imperative. To understand this placement. You are far more focused on how the partnership plays out, rather than the partnership itself. Again, unlike your predecessor, Libra, who is ruled by Venus and may be more interested in the looks of a relationship and romantic partner. Your sexual language is more interested in the psychology of your partner. You don’t care nearly as much about the outside as you do the inside. What draws you to your partner is a need to access the ultimate truths through your partners. Hence why, you are followed by Sagittarius/9H of Truth and Liberation. Your sex language involves restraint, power and hidden truths.
As I said before, it may be really difficult for you at times to truly connect with your partners because your energy can demand sooooo much from them. You will require partners to go through such depths in their relationship with you, that they may not be able to handle it. And on the other side of that, you may stay away from relationships because you may mistakenly feel like it brings out some of your “worst” qualities. With this Mars, you may go through a very intense relationship when you’re young, one where you give your all, I mean…you would kill or be killed for those you love, and because that relationship fails, you may never want to experience those types of lows again and stay away. You are one of the most loyal of the Mars placements, so you are very careful to study who exactly you are giving your loyalty to. I recommend with this placement, you may find yourself oddly attracted to Aquarian/11H energy. It sounds weird, water and air, but in this case, Aquarian energy is endlessly fascinating because they are so unorthodox, you will never truly figure them out, so you’re constantly intrigued by them. Aquarians also value loyalty the same way you do. They will allow you the freedom that you need to sit in your own emotions, but value the friendship in such a way, you won’t feel abandoned by them. Even if the people you are attracted to don’t have Aquarius in their chart, I think that quality is something you should consider when looking into intimate partners. It is probably the partner who gives you the most space and it is the hardest to figure out, that will give you the most in life. If you have a partner that is easy to conquer, not only will you be bored, but you can easily slip into those darker energies of control and manipulation to get you way…even when it’s unnecessary.
AAALLLL that said, you are still a hell of a lover! I mean…wow. You intricately know how to please and conquer. You use sex as a language itself when you’re ready and willing. And man, do you have a way with words. You can easily hypnotize a lover to fall under your command, so be careful with this gift. You are more than comfortable in this arena once you move past your fears in the subconscious. You can channel this energy, much like the exalt Mars in Capricorn to succeed with some of your greatest ambitions. You will put your sexual energy into your work and projects in a way like no other! Just don’t take everything so seriously! It’s okay to have a good time. Be intimate and open up some! You’ll enjoy getting your head out of the sand!
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Mars in Libra or Mars in the 7th House
“What a rush & what a high, cause when your love don’t fight, smoke gets in your eyes” Smoke In Your Eyes by Skepta, Ossie, Harry Stone
If you came to this section thinking that I was going to talk about how sweet and balanced you are when it comes to your sexual language…THINK. AGAIN. BABE. You are nothing of the sort. Seems contradictory, huh? Because Libra/7H is all about balance, right? Well…not when it comes to this Mars placement.
If you have your natal Mars in Libra or the 7th House, you are quite the spicy lover. To be completely honest, Mars is VERY uncomfortable here. Why? Because Libra is naturally ruled by the planet Venus, which is essentially the opposite frequency of Mars. I like to think of Mars and Venus as the brother and sister planets of the Milky way. Traditionally ruled by Ares and Aphrodite in Greek mythology respectively, they are technically half-siblings. So when you think of this Mars placement, this of how a girlie-girl would feel surrounded by all boys at a football camp. Sure, she may attract a lot of attention and she may have plenty of options…but she will CERTAINLY have to set clear boundaries to command the respect she deserves, as well as deal with the fact that no one around her may have the same interest. See how this can be uncomfortable? It’s not the worst thing to happen, but it can cause you to feel like you have to play the field a little bit differently because of Mars being in the House of Libra.
Okay, so now that we covered why this placement might be different than what you were imagining, let’s get into what this post is actually about!
If you have this natal placement, your sex language is all about breaking up to make-up. Because you’re on this constant quest of seeking balance, YOU will subconsciously or consciously seek chaos in order to regain balance. Your indecisive and somewhat aloof nature in relationships can be a source of frustration when it comes to your sexual expression with your lovers. If you have Mars in your 7H, you genuinely LOVE conflicts and attract conflicts to your relationships. You can be quite passive aggressive, honestly, and stir the pot to get attention. AAALLLL this being said, you still enjoy the finer things and love the idea of love, even though you may not have the most direct way of going about it. Your partners may even find you hard to read, and this can frustrate you, because your wishy-washy-ness is so innate to you, you may have a tendency to think that everyone is as back and forth with decision making as you are.
Ironically, more so than any of the previous placements I have discussed before, I will focus more on what sexual language you like from your partner rather than yourself. Of course, you like good food, good wine, good clothes, good banter, good company…you have Libra, like DUH, but I want to offer a different perspective on this placement.
So when it comes to your partners, you truly like a partner who takes charge, regardless of sex. You crave a level of masculinity and directness in your love language because as I stated earlier, it can be difficult for you to make decisions for yourself. You overemphasize how people will perceive you, and this can cause you to stunt your decision making, so you’ll find yourself craving a partner who can be unabashedly unapologetic in their approach to life. You seek partners who are brave and courageous and you will find yourself testing anyone you fall in love with to see if they have that spark of passion in them. You may find yourself seeking different things from different people, so you may have multiple lovers– and just like how it may take you forever to pick out your outfit in the morning, it may take you forever to figure out what you value in a partner. It is important to note that Libra/7H energy is indeed a masculine energy. I’m sure most would assume it’s feminine because of the “sophisticated” and charismatically social nature usually associated with Libras, but when it comes to sexual relationships, Taurus/2H energy is the feminine side of Venus. Libra energy in this way is more detached than people would think. As stated earlier, because you enjoy dates, chatting, getting to know people, you may be a really good casual dater! This could send mixed messages to potential lovers because you may have never really had any intention of dating them long-term– or, you really just haven’t decided yet. Now are we starting to see how this Mars placement can attract certain conflict? You will desire and crave a partner that can make decisions for you. This may lead to some kinkiness in the bedroom because you’re open to compromise and you can be bossed around in this regard.
Overall your sexual language is complex because of the inherent contradiction of this natal placement. You can make this work in your favor as long as you keep open communication with your partner, even if it’s to tell them that you need some more time before you’re comfortable making any lasting decisions. When you date, you will have to allow your partners to understand your up & down nature. Most people will probably take your pragmatic nature personally, so if you can find a way to channel this into being sexually playful with your lovers, it can be a great way to keep romance fun and interesting. As stated in the beginning, you are most likely to end up in an on-again-off-again kind of relationship because you like for the scales to be tipped, so you can rebalance them. You are far more detached in commitments than most people would assume, so it is essential for you to date like-minded people who understand that your coldness is not a reflection on your feelings. You choose to remain objective in your judgements and seek fairness in your relationships—even if you are the one who was unfair to begin with! Kiss it kiss it better baby!!!!
Mars in Virgo or Mars in the 6th House
“I got commitment issues, but I’m tryna fix that for you…I don’t believe in love, but that doesn’t mean I don’t take you serious” Commitment Issues by Central Cee
With Mars in Virgo or the 6th House, you may be surprised to find how non-committal you are when it comes to relationships. Why? Because you find relationships to be impractical. So when it comes to your sexual language, you are quite all over the place. Lovers can find you hard to catch, almost like trying to keep a fairy in a jar. You prefer to flutter around and keep things light in the sexual department. To you, sex can scream responsibility. After all, sex can be a pretty risky and dirty affair. All the fluid exchange and, ultimately, the required vulnerability, can make you quite uneasy. With this Mars placement, you can go between the two extremes of putting too much emphasis on sex or not enough emphasis at all. This is due to the natural ruler of Virgo/6H being Mercury, which, I find to be, an asexual planet. You are more interested in the intellectual connection than the physical connection.
BUT PLEASE, don’t get me wrong! You know you’re way around the bedroom. Your sexual language is constantly evolving. You do well with long-term partners that you can trust, study and get to know. You prefer a lover that is loyal, so you don’t have to worry about where they’ve been, or better yet, who they’ve been with. You find joy in repetition with one partner. OR, you are really open to “protected” one-night stands. You are either all in or all out. You don’t like to waste time on sexual relationships that you don’t see a return for a long-term investment. That being said, if you are unable to invest in the long-term, you can find yourself in a position of sexual frustration. You may really desire a person, but because of your deep need for perfection first, you may stall connections & find a lot of pleasure in masturbation for the time being. You, like your opposite sign, Pisces, can really get into your fantasies. You may find that erotica and romance novels can be great resources to pass the time while you likely toil between celibacy and being a whore (this is particularly funny to me because Virgos are known for being the Virgins of the zodiac– hence the contradiction in Mars in Virgo. The planet of sex and desire ruled by a “Virgin” is, uh….a difficult juxtaposition to say the least.) – again, it’s all about mental stimulation with you.
When you do meet a partner that you can FINALLY settle down and feel comfortable with, you will be a very giving lover. Because Virgo energy is usually associated with servitude, you better believe that you will make it your duty to service the object of your affection. You care very deeply about the satisfaction of your partner— far more than you care about your own. As stated earlier, you don’t mind finishing up solo as long as your partner is satisfied. You will find every nook and cranny, every deep desire, every love spot that your partner has, because you will analyze their body with astute detail. You will break your partner’s sexual language down and adapt it to be your own, because after all, you are a mutable sign. As well as being an earth sign, you do have a very deep sensual nature to you. Although you can come across as quite guarded with new partners, once you blossom, you really enjoy heavy petting and physical touch. You can spend so much time in your head and alone with your thoughts in other aspects of your life, you may find it very powerful to have a partner that literally grounds you and brings you back to planet Earth by holding you in their arms. Again, after you’ve bent over backwards (pun intended) to please your partner, you, more than any other sign, except maybe Leo, really needs to be acknowledged and celebrated for your hard work. You don’t take kindly to being undervalued or under appreciated when it comes to your romantic relationships in this context.
Believe it or not, this placement can actually be quite kinky! Why? Because of the influence of Mercury again. As stated before, you want to learn your partner’s as well as you possibly can to make sure you are seen as perfect in their eyes– sooooo, that means you’ll have some exploring to do. Mercury is such a curious planet, that it may not be kinky for the sensual pleasures of it all, but it will be interested in testing out sex & kinks for “research purposes”. This can give you a sort of detached feeling when it comes to sex, which may or may not work in your favor– you’re able to disassociate in a way that makes sex almost an out of body experience…it may take you some time to actually feel pleasure from sex. You are so focused on the other and pleasing your partner, you can forget that sex is supposed to be a two way street! I just want to reiterate, that this placement is so mutable, that you may find yourself pretty ambivalent towards sex at different times in your life. You’re kind of like “eh”. But there is hope, when you find a partner that lights your fire– you will find yourself wanting sex like a child wants candy! There is plenty of potential here for a beautifully active and engaging sex life– it just may take more time to develop than others.
Learn your own kinks! Have fun! Explore the more sensual side of life for yourself!
Anyone who is able to win you over (which is NOT an easy feat by any means) will be able to revel in the fact that you are such a wonderful lover! But don’t forget, sex is not a test that you can get an A + in, it’s supposed to be the culmination and celebration of it all!
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Mars in Leo or Mars in the 5th House
“She may be the queen of hearts, but I’m the queen of your body parts” - Cockiness, Rihanna
If you have Mars in Leo or Mars in the 5th House, you are Britney Spears, all eyes on me in the center of the ring just like a circus, bay-bee. You LOVE to put on a show. Your sexual language can make love-making a spectacle! You’re over the top, you’re loud, you roar. You LOVE LOVE LOVE the attention. So much so, you may not even need sex to fulfill that internal desire for you. Huh? What do I mean? I mean, you may be satisfied using your creative gifts for sexual gratification. Chances are with this placement, you are highly creative and charismatic. You find sensual pleasure in being able to share your creative gifts with other people. Haven’t you heard of entertainers saying they had so much fun on stage, it was orgasmic? That’s where you come in.
Ironically, I don’t naturally find this placement to be the most sexual. Don’t get me wrong, you are DOWN DIGGITY for a good time, but you really use sex as an ego booster. You may even be quite lazy in the bedroom. You could easily live by the code “my present is my presence” and be a dazzling pillow princess. This isn’t a bad thing, and it definitely doesn’t have to be the case all the time! When you’re turned on, you’re turned on, but when you’re just casually engaging in sex, or are in a long-term commitment, you may feel like sex is something that is owed to you. Not in a weird entitled way, but more like a Queen sitting on a chaise lounge being fed grapes– like, “duh, you should have sex with me, I’m beautiful”, type energy. This, if you haven’t been able to guess already, can lead to a selfish attitude in the love-making department. You must remember that sometimes, your partner wants to be catered to as well. That being said, you won’t shy away from Valentine’s Day. You are the type to go all out! You’ll put on the lingerie. You’ll lay out the rose petals on the bed. You’ll pay extra for that honeymoon suite. OR, you will expect your partner to do all of this without you asking. You treat holidays and sex as if it’s a royal affair.
Due to your standards being so high, I cannot express to you enough that you may really put all your sexual energy into your creative pursuits until you find a lover of high-value and high sex drive. You love and somewhat need to feel desired in order to break down your walls. You don’t play hard to get– you ARE hard to get, so this may leave you with extended periods of non-sexual activities. You are more than willing to give up sexual pleasure for your own personal pursuits– in fact, you are more likely to do that if you have specific career goals.
You may be a tad bit surprised at my interpretation of Mars in Leo, perhaps you were assuming it would be a bit spicier, but I challenge you to look at your ruler, the Sun (yes, the actual burning ball of fire in the sky) . Not literally…well, you can, but make sure you wear sun-glasses. But in all seriousness, the Sun shines alone. The Sun is too hot to let anything near it, and it carries such a gravitational pull, that things simply orbit around it, but can never get too close. With Mars in Leo/5th House, you may find yourself in this position when it comes to your sexual nature. You attract a lot of people towards you, but they are unable to get too close, for fear they will burn up in your presence. Or, you shine so bright, you are forced to do it alone. Being the Sun and the center of the Universe is a hard job, but ultimately an isolating job. Your being, your creative gifts, your star power and the way you shine can cast such a shadow on those who dare come near you. It really can be one of the most challenging placements because you probably won’t understand why people can’t/don’t come near you. Again, you’re just soooo great, people can have an overwhelming and unrealistic ideal of what it will take to make you happy. It’s a double-edged sword. On one hand, it’s flattering, but on the other hand, you can suffer from being put so high up on a pedal stool that you never asked for!
One tip for you, is to keep your hair beautiful and lushes! People will be attracted to your wild side and want to bring that out of you. You can either really love having your hair pulled or be turned off by it because you spend so much time making it look perfect. Either way, your hair may be an essential part of foreplay for you and something that suitors may find undeniably sexy.
As long as you are mindful to share the spotlight from time to time and not always prioritizing your needs & your desires, you can be a remarkably loyal partner. Fierce is the word that comes to mind and you can be very fierce in the bedroom. (When you want to be.) You can outshine any of the competition. Most people truly can’t hold a candle to you when it comes to how committed you are in an intimate relationship. You are proud and you protect those that are around you and that you deem worthy. You have a royal air that surrounds you and it loudly and proudly screams `bow down bitches' when it's time to get down and dirty!
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Mars in Cancer or Mars in the 4th House
“Let me kiss you hard in the pouring rain, you like your girls insane” Born to Die- Lana Del Rey
If you have Mars in Cancer or Mars in the 4th house, ironically, your sex language involves a knack of overwhelming emotional destruction. Dramatic, yes, yes, I know, but very true. Mars is VERY uncomfortable in the deep waters of Cancer/4H. Mars in the 4th House, in particular, is a naturally difficult placement because it sits in the House of happiness, as well as aspects the 7th House of partnership and the 11th House of friendship– making that native, uh, a little difficult to deal with. Why? Because your emotions can be so erratic and illogical, it can be difficult for people to understand what you want. Heck, you probably don’t understand what you want most of the time. I promise I’ll get to the good stuff, but keep in mind that this Mars placement is in detriment! (It’s exalted in Capricorn, the opposite sign.) So when it comes to your sexual language, you value such a deeply emotional commitment from your partner, you could constantly try to test them by pushing their emotional boundaries.
There is a mixture of pleasure and pain. You love an emotional outburst– this can be good and sexy, or bad and scary. Emotionally bonding make-up sex, is your cup of tea…ESPECIALLY if you are the one who caused the “break-up” in the first place. You truly enjoy engaging with your partner in a loving way, when you can, but because Mars is so unstable here, it can be hard for you to maintain emotional consistency within long-term relationships. You can find that your passions wax and wane for your partner. Sometimes, you just want to run into their arms and kiss them in the pouring rain, other times, you want them to LEAVE YOU DAFUQ ALONE. This can be quite jarring to your intimate partners, but also to yourself. I recommend embracing this quality and being as honest as possible! Instead of literally creating a sh*t storm in order to be left alone, just communicate to your partner that you need a little space from time to time. But also be willing to give your partner that same courtesy and grace if they ask for the same.
You can feel a need to wrap yourself up in your partner's desires. It may come from a genuine place, but because Mars is an aggressive planet, you may be quite aggressive in how you demonstrate your love to your partner because your deepest desire is to be able to emotionally control them. This can manifest in an extremely emotionally manipulative way through passive aggressiveness and just causing overall uneasiness within your dynamics and partnerships. One of the lovely sides about this particular placement, is when you mature, you can have an extremely high emotional I.Q. Because you are naturally very sensitive to your surroundings, you can literally sense the emotional and physical needs of your partner without them having to say a word. You can be so emotionally intune with your lovers, it can feel like telepathy if they need anything from you. You just know, y’know?
In the bedroom, you can go from one extreme to another. Sometimes you want to be dominant, and sometimes you want to be dominated. It is important for your lovers to be able to ride your waves and learn what is needed from them at any given moment. Again, Mars is all about conquest. So when Mars is in the 4H in particular, you want to be able to be the leader in your home, but you also want someone who can take the reins when necessary. Again, this can be a difficult balance to strike within your sexual relationships because people may not understand the method behind the madness, typically because there really isn’t a method…it’s just kind of madness AND THAT’S OKAY!
Because Mars is so uncomfortable here, it is imperative for you to be able to channel your energy in creative ways or you can fall victim to your own emotional tirades. You want a clear line of communication with anyone you are interested with and they absolutely need to have some emotional intelligence or else they will drown in your water. You don’t want to suffocate your lovers with so much emotional intensity, that you both are unable to remain somewhat grounded in the chaos. You of all people understand just how powerful emotions and sex can be together, so be careful to use it wisely!!! When done right, you can have anyone wrapped around your finger.
Mars in Gemini or Mars in the 3rd House
“Talk is cheap my darling, when you’re feeling right at home. I wanna make you move with confidence. I want to be with you alone” Talk is Cheap by Chet Faker
If you have Mars in Gemini or Mars in the 3rd House, then you are all about an intellectual connection when it comes to your sexual language. You want to catch viiibbbeezzz. You want to be razzle-dazzled with the lingo. You want someone hip, cool, in the know…because, well, you’re hip, cool & in the know, y’know? It’s only fitting that your partner be the same. You, of all placements, may truly crave “your other half”. And I know, I know, we live in a world now, where people are saying “you are a whole person and you’re looking for another whole person yadayadayada…”, but you’re a TWIN. You want to be able to connect with someone as if you share the same brain, the same thoughts, the same…everything. This isn’t to say that you’re not sexual…you just enjoy mental jousting for foreplay. Think of how beautiful the dance between two evenly matched fencing partners is– the ebb and flow of tension – playing both parts of the aggressor and the defender– gliding almost effortlessly with a weapon in hand. It’s like the tango…but with swords. That’s how you envision your love. Beautiful art, yet dangerous. You may not be the most sensual lover at first, but in time you will certainly warm up. Why? Because at the very least, you are a curious partner! You. Want. To. Explore. You may be the type of lover to want to try almost anything once. You want to be surprised. You don’t want your bedroom to be boring. You resent repetitiveness and you welcome new experiences. You may even fall into the “switch my wig, make ‘em feel like he cheating” category. You like to switch up your look, your style…sexual positions (lol). This can even translate into role play! (Especially teacher/student).
I cannot express to you enough how much learning from your partner turns you on. You love asking questions & consider getting to know someone a conquest. The more difficult the puzzle, the more you yearn to solve it and this type of stimulation oozes over into your sexual pleasure. You’re curious to know what your lover’s love. You can have an objective perception of sex, because you aren’t the most naturally emotional person, so you can look at the love making process as getting to know every nook and cranny of a partner’s body– learning what makes them tick & “ick”. You become more emotionally open with a partner, the more confident that you are that you know them. You like learning, but you don’t like unpleasant surprises. This may be counter intuitive, but I find that after you go through your “lemme try any & everything era”, you will genuinely enjoy one partner. It will make you feel secure and like you have that missing piece in life. You don’t come across as the most committal type, but when you do commit, you commit fr fr, you just need a certain level of freedom in life to continue to expand your horizons far past the mundane in life.
Another element you may add to your sexual reservoir is……drugs. “DON’T DO DRUGS, KIDS & STAY IN SCHOOL”...alright, there is my disclaimer. Now back to what I was saying, you may be curious to try mind-expanding drugs & smex. Because you can be so cerebral, drugs like ecstacy can help you actually feel your body. The tingle will start from your subconscious mind, and venture into your conscious body, possibly making love-making a more pleasurable experience. If this doesn’t interest you, don’t worry, no pressure! Just making a note that this placement is more likely to think outside of the box when it comes to making their sex lives thrilling and exciting! Not saying that vanilla sex is boring…just saying in general. You do you!
Overall, this is a curious placement. It’s a fun placement, but it can be an extremely flighty placement in the beginning. Don’t let your fear of getting stuck, stop you from finding a true partner that you can really see the world with. You can find that “other half”, that “twin soul” that really knows how to light a fire in you and warm your cold cold cold gemini heart. In your moments of passion, you will prefer to keep things fun and light. Only when someone truly captures your mind, can they capture your body and soul! SEXYYYYYY!!!!
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Mars in Taurus or Mars in the 2nd House
“People stop to ask me, how do you please your man? Take it from the black sheep baby, any way I can. Sometimes it’s with fire and sometimes, with ice…Just don’t get it twisted, his body’s gunna pay the price.”
- Rock My Boy’s Body by Joseph Stephens
If you have Mars in Taurus or Mars in the 2nd House your sexual language is about sensuality, sexuality, & seduction. You believe in making love an all encompassing experience and you will stop at nothing to make sure your partners have an all exclusive pass to your BO-DAY. IF it is earned. Because Taurus is naturally slow moving energy, you may be slow to open up. As I’ve studied astrology for years now…I’ve come to realize that Taurus energy is just as private and cautious and it’s opposite sign, Scorpio. If you have this placement, you feel the need to study your lovers and you wait and wait and wait and wait and wait before you make your move. But if you are able to wrap them in your warm embrace…you won’t want to let go and they won’t want you to either.
Like Leo, when it comes to your sexual language, you believe in putting on a show. But your show is subtle, quaint and slow burning. You will have the candles burning, the scented lotion and fresh out the shower smell, you will have the most luxurious sheets on the most comfortable mattress. You don’t believe in cutting corners when it comes to your comfort and whoever is lucky enough to wind up in your bed, simply gets to enjoy how you live your life. I could bet you have an impeccable taste in music and truly know how to set the tone when it comes to seduction. As stated before, you are able to create a world of pure pleasure for those you love and make them spell-bound to you, because chances are, they haven’t been able to match with a sexual partner who cares so much about the details of ALL 6 senses. (I’m including intuition because, y’know, I’m a tarot and an astrology girlie.) For example, I dated this guy with heavy taurus placements a few years ago. I very much remember and very much miss this awesome TV room that he made for himself. Instead of having a regular degular couch, he had a couch that was also a bed. It wasn’t a couch that converted into a bed….it was just a couch that had a bed in it…and massive 70 inch television mounted on the wall. When I TELL you, I wanted to marry that man because….UGH!!! I was so comfortable! I could melt into the floor when I was with him. And I have YET to be with anyone who has a room set up quite like that. The feeling has stayed with me long after we have been together. THAT is what I mean by the power of Mars in Taurus. It lingers when you’re done!
On the other side, you of all signs, can be extremely jealous and possessive over your sexual partners. You DO NOT LIKE TO SHARE. AT. ALL. The 2nd House is all about owning and possessions and you may take this mindset with you into your romantic relationships. To the right person and in a healthy way, this can be enduring and make your partner feel safe and secure in your presence. In turn, you also want to know that your partner is crazy about you and cares deeply about your well-being. Again, in a healthy dynamic, a little jealousy and possessivness isn’t bad. It can show that someone does have an interest in you and takes pride in the fact that they are able to claim you as their own. This is just something to be mindful of in this placement, because if underdeveloped, it can lead to issues of selfishness & strong resistance to allow your partner’s freedom. Of course this can bleed over into the bedroom as well. You don’t want to get so focused on your own comfort that you end up putting your partner into a routine that they no longer enjoy. Your favorite position may not be their favorite positive. It can feel like eating lobster every single day. Like, yeah, Lobster is great day 1, maybe even day 2, but by day 5….yuck. Depending on other placements in your chart, you may attract partners who are very much like you, in the sense they prefer routine, OR you may attract partners who are so wild and out of the box, it forces you out of your comfort zone. All I can do is say embrace whatever floats your boat.
There is no doubt that you are one of the most sexual, sensual and passionate lovers of the zodiac. Your innate knowledge of pleasure makes you an expert in the bedroom and you can be hard to beat. Although it may take you a while to warm up, either physically or emotionally, you eventually show your partners that it is absolutely worth the wait! Because you tend to be safe and secure in yourself (the 2nd house rules self esteem) you share that safety and extend your protection to those you love the most. Your sexual language is unforgettable. You know how to love someone head to toe! WOOOOO!!!
Mars in Aries or Mars in the 1st House
“Dollhouse, dressed up, perfect messed up, Torture me to sleep, paint the air I breathe. Fishbowl, chokehold, dirty water, I’m cold. Dirty as can be, have your way with me.” Dollhouse (with Lily Rose Depp) by The Weeknd
If you have Mars in Aries or Mars in the 1st House, your sexual language is intense & powerful. You have a way of pulling people into your orbit just by being your unapologetic self! The force is with you! Best believe! And people feel it. You get what you want and you want what you get and you have a way of luring in your prospective sexual partner by projecting your lust onto them– so much so they feel it when they walk by you. Much like your sister, the Mars ruled Scorpio, there is a carnal desire that surrounds you. It’s magnetic. It’s magnificent. And it’s very fleeting.
When it comes to your bedroom pleasures, you can be a pioneer of the “Wham! Bam! Thank you ma’am or…sir” (not as cute of a rhyme) mindset. You may have a habit of treating your lovers like conquest– wanting to overpower them and wrap them up in your passionate fantasies. You deeply enjoy power play in your sex life. Yes, you could easily be the dominant one in your relationships, BUT you could also seek refuge in being submissive to your partner. How? I know it seems contradictory. But chances are, with this placement (unless it’s in a water sign in your first house) you are more than likely the boss and the leader in your everyday life…so when it comes to sex, you may want to just “relax” and let your partner do all the hard work for once. If that’s the case, you may be a bit of a brat in the bedroom because you still like to challenge your partner for shizz & giggles, but you are certainly fun and definitely unforgettable.
Your sex language is raw and real. You don’t like to hold back your passion and you appreciate a partner who can match your enthusiasm in the bedroom. You love the runner chaser dynamic, and again, you can easily play both parts. You are strong and competitive and don’t like to lose the interest of your lovers, even though you can get bored pretty easily. You may prefer quickies over long drawn up love sessions, but that doesn’t mean you don’t like to indulge your sinuses from time to time– you’re just not one of the most lovey dovey of the zodiac and prefer loud, wild, hot, steamy sex opposed to soft caresses and whispers of sweet nothings. You may also be a person who uses sexy time to advance a certain agenda. You could use sex as a tool of manipulation to get what you want. That may seem extreme, but think about a stripper using her sensuality as a means to make money so she can pay her way through law school. THAT’S what I mean. Because you may not be so shy about your sex appeal, if used correctly, it can be your weapon of choice when it comes to getting what you want from someone.
Passion matters to you more than most. You would prefer a risky lover than a predictable one. You also may be a fan of the ole’ break up to make-up trope. Make-up sex is always better. And you don’t mind starting a fight in the streets, simply to uh…you know…end it….in the sheets…..if you catch my drift. You aren’t one for subtleties. You are probably one of the most straightforward and upfront people in the world and you may play shy, but once you allow a person to get to know you, you don’t hold anything back. Because you are a cardinal energy, you always have a childlike flair to you! You keep things interesting and youthful. You’re not afraid to cross boundaries and push the limits of yourself & your partner in the midst of a sexual act. You really may think that sex is something that can be “won”. You want to be the best. You want to be the one that lovers can’t get enough of. You don’t appreciate being compared to others and honestly hear partners talking about their past as if it was some sort of challenge. You definitely have a jealous and possessive streak, but like I always say, when this is a healed energy it can be enduring to the right partner. As long as it’s not obsessive and unhealthy, you can provide comfort to your lovers that you are there for them and only them. You expect loyalty in return, of course, but you don’t mind protecting and defending what you see as your own. Your love is real. Your love is honest. Your love is young and wild and free!
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percyjavksongf · 4 months
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𝐇𝐞𝐲 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫!.•❀
➤𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐁𝐨𝐨𝐤!𝐏𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐲 𝐉𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐬𝐨𝐧 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
➤𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 𝟐’𝟖𝟖𝟓
➤𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: 𝐛𝐢𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐣𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐲 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐲, 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐲𝐤 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐫𝐢𝐥𝐥
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“𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐬𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧’𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫“ 𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐦𝐞 “𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮“ 𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐝,
“𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐧 𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐫“
𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜𐮜
Somewhere in camp, Percy was probably off teaching younger campers how to properly wield a sword, and you? Well your contribution to Camp Half-Blood was keeping your pouting face hidden in a feather filled pillow.
You thought of dragging your tired legs off the bed and going out, doing something productive with your last few days at camp before the summer was up, but then you’d feel sick at the thought off speeding up your day by doing something productive, so you’d just sigh and roll over in your bed. Your internal fight to leave bed lasted for an hour or so before you came to the conclusion that at least sitting up in bed would be better then slowly suffocating in your bed sheets, so you did just that.
You groaned at the pop your back made when you finally pulled yourself up, gods you really needed to get out of this bed. Although you understand it probably makes a hell of a lot of more sense to actually achieve something on this crisp summer day, like run through the strawberry fields with Selina nipping at your heals, squealing with happiness as the sun beats down unforgivingly against your sweating skin. Or maybe you’d be sneaking around with Connor, he always knew how to put an honest smile of your face, even if others found him annoying, you believed he had a hidden sweetness to him that he covered up with stupid jokes and wild pranks.
You flipped through your thoughts for awhile, humming the familiar tune that drifted through the air of your mother’s cabin, Demeter, admiring the wildflowers that seemed to almost dance along with the tune. A knock at your Cabin door had you reluctantly removing your eyes from the ballet of the wildflowers and staring curiously at the door, you weren’t expecting anyone so you almost considered ignore the noise, that was until they started knocking furiously on the door and forcing you up from your comfortable position. You walked over to the door quickly in hopes to stop the awful banging that disturbed the plants and swung the door open.
“you wanna get drunk?”
Pollux.
You send him a false look of annoyance and let your eyes travel down to the pitcher of grape flavoured cool aid in his purple stained hands, he must’ve just made it.
“drunk?” you questioned incredulously, “have you finally done it? Turned water into wine! Oh you’re a little Jesus in the making!” you cried out dramatically and reach for the pitcher. Pollux, picking up on your tease right away quickly moved to hold the pitcher away from you
“ha ha, very funny. I’m obviously still working on completing that miracle, but in the mean time we could go get a sugar rush” Pollux peered behind you, raising a brow at your obviously recently occupied bed “or are you too busy?” you rolled your eyes and put a hand to Pollux’s chest, pushing him the rest of the way out of your cabin’s front door and turning to shut it behind you. You supposed it wouldn’t be much harm to spend an hour out in the fresh air.
An hour turned into five and the sun was starting to set on yours and Pollux’s makeshift dining area, the once filled pitcher was now discarded, empty and resting on it’s side. Pollux and you had moved to rest against a rough tree and people watch, making comments on possible up and coming romances in the camp.
“you know I’ve heard a few rumours about you” Pollux stated matter of factly and you gasped, turning to face him in an instant. “you have to tell me”
“no I don’t” Pollux grinned, obviously enjoying the power he had over the topic
“yes you do, you can’t bring it up and then not tell me” you state seriously, causing Pollux to grin wider “actually I just heard from the department of hidden information and yep, uh huh, ok yeah I’ll let them know. No, I don’t have to tell you” you stared unimpressed at the skit Pollux played out for you of him answering the phone to deny your request, you looked away from him and stared off at the sunset, “thats fine smart ass, I’ll just have to let Mr D know about the time you actually got drunk, and how it wasn’t done by any miracle but more so by a lie his devious son managed to get away with”
“It’s about you and Percy”
A laugh burst out of your chest at how quickly he confessed, and you failed to notice boy’s stare burning into your skin, and the slight blush forming on his face. You laughter had died down and you finally registered his rushed words.
“Percy and I? What about us” you questioned curiously. Percy and you had been joined at the hip since you first came to Camp Half-blood, both having a peculiar love for blue food and the ability to get yourselves into all sorts of trouble. You’d say you became close friends after the fight of Manhattan, you had taken a nasty blow to the head that left you unconscious for a couple of days, when you had finally awoken in the camp infirmary the first thing you noticed besides the pounding in between your ears, was the exhausted face of Percy Jackson sitting in the chair beside your bed, his restless hands fiddling with your bed sheets. Since that day Percy almost seemed to make a habit out of making sure to see you every single day. The thought snapped you back to the present, surprised you hadn’t already realised it, you hadn’t seen Percy today.
“just something about you two spending a lot more time together, thats all. You know how people around here gossip over nothing” you frowned at the bitter tone of his voice and looked back towards the camp, where was Percy?
“have you seen Percy today?” you replied, forgetting the topic of your conversation mere seconds earlier. You tried to ignore the small frown that appeared on Pollux’s mouth at the mention of Percy. Over the past few months you had noticed Pollux’s opinion of Percy shift every so slightly, he used to be overjoyed by the mention of Percy but now it seemed to be the worst thing you could talk about with him, and you weren’t really sure why.
“probably somewhere showing off his sword fighting or something” Pollux grumbled and leaned back on his hands “never mind him, lets just lounge in the sun and pretend we had a productive day”
“let us live as flowers, wild and beautiful and drenched in the sun” you grin and look over to Pollux, knowing the quote will earn you an eye roll
“yeah ok flower power, just change the last part to drenched in wine and I’ll accept it” an eye roll or a dumb comment.
Your gaze returned to the camp once more and to your surprise you spot Percy only a few feet away from you, walking over at a comfortable pace. That was always something you enjoyed about Percy, he always seemed so laid back. You let a smile bloom over your face and lifted you hand up to block out the dying sun,
“hello miss wild and beautiful and drenched in the sun” the shit eating grin that graced Percy’s features maked your heart flutter,
“you’re here to eavesdrop I see” you quickly take note of the new freckles that decorate his sun kissed complexion, and the gentle stream of red that’s flowing on his upper arm that makes you frown and get to your feet, at his side in an instant “Percy your arm-”
“it’s fine, really. Just comes with the job of teaching twelve year olds how to use a sword” you carefully brush your thumb over the skin just beside the cut, it was just a nick but still was un welcomed by you none the less.
You hummed and removed your hand from his skin, it almost felt like your palm was burning as it drifted away from Percy, itching for the contact once again. A forced cough from behind you steals your attention, Pollux had gathered his pitcher and gave you a tight lipped smile, “I’ll leave you to it, see you around” you gave him a smile wave and thanked him again for the cool aid, you turned away from his retreating form you’re met with another unimpressed look.
“you better hope the wind doesn’t change, Perseus”
Percy’s burnt nose wrinkles from the name, only his mother calls him by his real name.
“what have I done to deserve a full name?” he scoffed
“give me that look” you replied matter of factly
Percy’s frown deepened for a moment before springing back up into a soft smile, the wind had picked up and you watched as his hand reached forward to tuck away a strand of your hair that was moving lazily in the breeze. You stared up at Percy through your lashes, uncaring of the heat that bloomed on your face. Percy knew the effect he had on you anyways.
“Pollux doesn’t like me” Percy said, moving his hand to rest against your cheek, his calloused thumb drawing soft circles on your skin. Your eyes scan your surroundings, hoping to the gods that no one was around to disturb your moment of piece, where the cloak fell off and left Percy’s love for you proudly displayed. Percy’s other hand playfully pinched the exposed skin on your waist and your eyes fixed to his once more. “don’t worry about them, let them see us”
Your eyebrows raised unintentionally at that, Percy and you had decided to keep your budding romance to yourselves when it first began, when the war had just ended and you felt it was best to leave that detail out, more focused on the loss of your fellow campers and dealing with that grief. But as the months went on you had still stayed the same, secret meetings after the camp fire had died down, sneaking into the lake with the help of the Percy’s air bubbles, only the fish that inhabited there knew of your love for each other. Sometimes during a particularly serious game of capture the flag, one where you and Percy were on different teams, he would manage to sneak up on you a steal a quick kiss before running off with a laugh in attempts to through you off your game. You’d always return the kiss later after your team won.
“why do you think Pollux doesn’t like you?” you questioned
“because he likes you” Percy replied much to your surprise “it’s all anyone at camp can talk about these days, they swear he’s going to ask you out any day now” it’s hard to miss the slight grumble in his voice as he goes on about how Pollux has been flirting with you for months, but you honestly hadn’t picked up on it. Right now you were more focused on the way Percy’s eyebrows furrowed slightly at the mention of Pollux trying to woo you. You’d had reached the wooded area of camp and reached for Percy’s hand then, your fingers intertwined and you positioned yourself in front of him, now walking backwards to face him as you spoke. Percy seemed to be more focused on guiding you away from any trees unknown to you.
“I don’t think he dislikes you, Percy. He’s never said anything bad about you” you said, Percy hands moved to your hips to side step you away from a fallen branch.
“he’s never said bad about me to you, probably” Percy said
“probably, see it’s not definite” you attempted to reason, any other words leaving your mind in a heartbeat when you feel the scratchy bark of a tree pressed against your back. You eyes stayed glued to Percy’s as he stepped closer to you, his hands drifting up to your waist. You looked around then to see if any campers, or gods forbid, Mr D, were taking a stroll through the woods at this time. Percy’s fingers resting on your jaw beckoned your attention back to him “always looking around” he spoke lowly, his words for you and you alone.
“are you sure you want to make this known?” you’re unsure why you whispered it, there was no one around anyways. But you still felt nervous, it only took one person to see before the news would spread like wildfire, and you would be bombarded with invasive questions and ‘how could you not tell me!’ from your siblings. Too be honest you kind of liked being a little secret, knowing you had Percy all to yourself. But you knew how much better it would be to not have to sneak around everywhere, the teasing would die down eventually and your relationship would be common knowledge.
“I think we’ve hidden this away for way to long, I want everyone to know you’re my girl”
you can’t contain the smile that his words bring you, his girl.
“we’ll only if you’re ok with that, of course” he followed up with quickly
“yeah I think it’s about time I explain to Miranda why I keep waking her up at three in the morning to let me in through the window” you laughed, imagining the look on her face when you finally spill the beans to her, she’s undoubtedly by excited by the news, but probably also scold you for keeping it from her for so long.
The sun’s golden rays poured down through the dancing leaves that dressed the trees and sunk into your skin, you watched as Percy’s eyes almost seemed to glow in the light, he was summer’s child.
You relaxed against the tree and pulled Percy closer to you, and for a moment you let the world consist of just the two of you. You never thought it ever would, even though the two of you had been friends since the age of twelve there was never a time where you could just breathe together. there was always a quest, or a battle, or a four thousand year old girl who Percy vanished with for two weeks, that one had caused a raft between you for a few weeks.
But now you simply exist together, and it makes everything worth it.
You brought a hand up to rest against his upper arm, revelling in the heat that was coming of his dirt covered skin, you made a mental note to tease him about it later and send him off to the showers. Your hand continued it travels upwards and you finally landed in the space between his shoulder and his neck, running a thumb against the underside of his jaw.
“you in love with me or something?” Percy teased, drawing a hum from you in response
“I might just be, Jackson” you grinned, before letting out a gasp as Percy dipped his head quickly and kissed you. It started off heavy and warmed you up like nothing else, it slowed down into soft pecks before Percy drew away, not without pressing on last kiss to your redden lips.
“I might just love you too” Percy breathes out, dipping back down again to press his lips to the side of your mouth, “my sweet girl” he mumbled against your lips finally before pressing one last kiss to them.
“Percy” you whispered, putting a hand against his chest to create some distance as you flushed at the realisation of how exposed the two of you were. Percy took a step back with a smug grin, his hands never leaving you.
“you are though” Percy continues, causing you shove against him gently in protest “my sweet girl, or do you prefer my girl, cus you know both statements are true-”
“shut up” you whine out in embarrassment, he was so shameless. Percy laughed at your protest and took your hand in his, pulling you towards the rows of cabins.
“what’re we doing?” you said, letting him lead you away from the shade of the trees, Percy only smiled at you before continuing ahead
“we’re going to hang out with the rest of the campers, maybe your friend Pollux will be there”
you give him a deadpan look at the mention of Pollux, still wondering how a man like Percy could be jealous of your friendship with Pollux, it was obvious you only had eyes for him.
“and why are you so eager to get us there?” you questioned curiously
“cus I want them all to see that you’re my girl” he stated back as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, bringing your intertwined hands up to his lips to press a quick kiss against. You sighed and made a show of dramatically rolling your eyes.
I guess he was sticking to that term, his girl.
...
a/n: helloooo, wrote this in a couple of hours so it's rushed like all of my works <3 my first non christmas inspired percy work so i hope yous like it!!!
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shotmrmiller · 5 months
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Tormented by a Ghost
Pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x F!Reader
TW: small mention of smut and simon being kinda mean
TY TO MY BETA FOR MAKING THIS 10X BETTER @c-h-a-r-n-i-k
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Tired of living with your family, you decide to move out. There's just one problem— Rent is too costly to afford on your own. You complain about it to your friend, and they tell you that they know someone who's also looking for a roommate and preferably another female. Fantastic!
Your friend gives you her number and ya'll are moving in together by the end of the month. It was great. No nagging parents, no micromanagement, nothing. You loved it. Until your roommate brings her man over. And he's a fucking bully.
--
You're crawling home from a hard day at work, and you want nothing more than some wine on a quiet night. Unlocking the door, you step into the flat. The lights aren't turned on so you assume your roommate isn't home.
Dumping your bag in your room, you make a beeline towards the kitchen. As you're bent over in the fridge, your roommate's door opens.
"Hey,” you call out, "I'm pourin' myself a glass of wine if you're interested!"
Then an assertive, baritone voice speaks from behind you.
"You must be the roommate."
You give an ear-piercing scream as you jump, whipping around to face him with a hand over your racing heart.
"Fuckin' hell! No, it's okay, I don't need my hearin' er nothin'." he scolds.
"What the fuck! I almost flat-lined with my head in the fridge because of you!"
Then you get a good look at him. This monster of a man is a minimum 6'3, with a black balaclava covering his face, a black long-sleeve shirt, and grey sweats. You tried real hard to not ogle the tattoo that stains his exposed left arm. And the grey sweats, we all know why. Cursed be your fetish for thick forearms and big hands.
He leans his head back, looking down his nose at you.
"I think it'd be an improvement," he says, "You face down, I mean," and your eyebrows shoot up to your hairline as he chuckles.
You don't know who he thinks he is, talking to you—a complete stranger— like that but you aren't about to take his shit.
You sneer. "Fuck you. Yeah, I bet that's the view you get the most. Women willingly turn away to not get a look at your mug. Did my roommate ask you to put that mask on so she could face you during sex?"
He steps forward, his height allowing him to tower over you, and growls out, "You callin' me ugly?"
Smirking, you roll your eyes. Of course.
"I don't see any other reason for you to hide your face. Not that it matters to me— I'm not the one that has to tolerate it."
His eyes squint at you as he retorts, "I'm quite the opposite."
Opening your mouth, you're about to tell him that he can say whatever helps him sleep at night when your roommate calls out to the big brute in front of you.
"Ghost? What's taking so long?" she asks.
You tried and failed miserably to hide your mocking giggle at hearing his name, and he leers at you in response. "Go on, Ghost. You're being called back into the realm of the dead."
As he steps away, he says with contempt, "Dumb little bird doesn't know what she's talking about," before walking over to your roommate, looping his arm around her shoulders and going into her room.
He probably doesn't even know your name and he laid into you like he's hated you his whole life. After pouring yourself a glass of wine, you shake your head and walk towards your bedroom. Freak.
--
One day, after having your friend with benefits over in the morning for some nice stress relief, you walk him out. And fucking Ghost is sitting on the couch with his arms crossed. You quickly shuffle your friend out the door, face glowing with embarrassment.
Why was he here? Jesus Christ, now he's going to watch you do the walk of shame around the flat. Hopefully, he won't say anything. As you walk away from the door to the kitchen to get a bottle of water, Ghost speaks up.
"Well, that was pathetic."
You hang your head and close your eyes in resignation. Should've known someone as toxic as he wouldn't mind his own goddamn business.
"What now, Ghost?"
He sounds oddly smug as he says, "I've been here for a couple of hours, and I didn't hear anything coming out of your room. Sounds like he doesn't know what to do with a cunt."
Behind gritted teeth, you grind out, "Don't worry about my pussy, bud. You've got yours coming in," and you hold the n as you look at your watch, "30 minutes. Now piss off."
As you stomp away towards your room, the bottle of water all but forgotten, you hear him let out a deep chuckle. He's an asshole. A physically attractive one, sans the face, but still an asshole. You're going to have to get your friend to come over more often if Ghost is going to continue being around with those jacked arms and deliciously tight grey sweats.
Sucking your teeth, you make a mental note to ask your roommate why she gave him a key to your shared flat without asking.
--
A week later, your roommate has Ghost over and you figure it'd be a good time to get some action yourself. You send him a text and in less than 20 minutes, you're letting him in. Hugging him, you tell him to go to the bedroom. But he's not paying attention to you— he's looking directly behind you.
Turning around to look, it's Ghost. Goddamn it. And this time he's shirtless with his arms crossed and a skull mask on. God fucking damn it. Pulling the arm of your friend, he looks down at you and you tell him to go on, that you'll be there soon.
He nods, walking away with one last look at the phantom leaning against your roommate's door. Exhaling a ragged sigh, you turn back to Ghost.
"Can I help you?"
He shakes his head mutely before responding, "No, lovie, but I can help you." You shake your head at his nonsense.
"No. I'm not doing this with you."
You turn to walk away when he speaks again.
"Yer really gonna let him touch you again? He clearly doesn't know what he's doing— Bedroom's silent as a crypt. Even with those glasses he's got on, he can't find what he should be lookin' for."
Insulted for your friend, you face Ghost with a disbelieving look on your face.
"You're not seriously standing here trying to cockblock me. You—" his audacity has you stammering, "You have no idea what I'm like. Maybe I'm just naturally quiet in bed."
Ghost stares at you for a solid minute before he shrugs and goes back to your roommate.
Unbelievable asshole. Why does he have to look so good shirtless, the berk.
--
You start noticing that Ghost is there a couple of hours before your roommate gets there and you'd think it's weird if you weren't too busy being distracted by the fact that he's always taunting you one way or the other. And then one day, you question him on it.
"You do know your girlfriend won't be home until the evening? It's barely 3."
Ghost turns his head from the TV to look at you and grunts.
"Not my girlfriend." That's news to you.
"Then why you spendin' so much time over here? You're gonna have me thinkin' you like spending time in my delightful presence." you banter with a teasing smile.
Ghost continues to stare at you and the heated look in his eyes confuses you but then he turns back to the TV.
"I can't stand ya, ya daft bint."
You pretend you don't hear the muted tenderness in his voice.
--
And on a sunny day, it all comes crashing down. The boys are over again, but this time Ghost is boring holes into the back of your head as you both go into your respective rooms. You're straddling your boy's hips shirtless when you hear your roommate's furious yelling from the other side of the flat and then stomping towards the front door before it slams closed.
After your bedroom door is busted open, the bolt being broken out of the faceplate from the brutal strength behind the force— and you're jumping off the bed and crossing your arms over your exposed chest.
It's Ghost and he's staring directly at your friend on the bed.
"No." He stomps over to grab your friend by his shirt and drags him off the bed and towards the front door before tossing him against it with a nasty-sounding slam.
"Get the fuck out."
Your friend is spluttering when Ghost cuts him off.
"If I see you here again, I'm turnin’ those silly little glasses," and he taps a lens with his finger, "into contacts. Now get the fuck out. I won't repeat myself." And with that, he trips over his own feet running out the door.
You're standing in the living room. eyes are wide in disbelief. What just happened? There's a moment of silence before Ghost breaks it.
"Your roommate won't be coming back today." He walks over to you picks you up to sit you on the kitchen countertop and lifts his mask over his mouth.
"Now. You're going to come on my tongue before I fuck you and personally test out this 'I'm quiet' theory, pet." You look down at him and sigh.
"I think I'm gonna need a new roommate," you lament.
Pulling the gusset of your knickers to the side, he says, "Don't worry your pretty little head over that. I'll be moving in with you. Also, no. You don't have a choice."
He digs his fingers into your thigh and purrs against your skin, “If you find it in you to scream, my real name’s Simon.�� 
And with the way his usually sharp tongue delicately rubs against your clit, you can't find it in you to argue.
A/N: dreamt of this and it had me in a chokehold.
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fiddleleafedfig · 6 days
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@wolfstarmicrofic | April 23:rd Teacher AU | Also inspired by this incredible post | 971 words
“It’s because I’m gay.”
Dora’s words had echoed in his head for the better duration of two years.
Two years.
Jesus Christ.
It sounds more clear now that there isn’t an ever pressing haze of alcohol clouding his brain. But alas, he frankly can’t afford to be an alcoholic anymore. He wasn’t even that good at it. A bottle of wine every evening and Remus just turned into a weepier version of his otherwise quite bleak self and watched old rom-coms on tv until he fell asleep on the couch.
But an English teacher’s salary isn’t hefty enough to really support a proper addiction and Remus hadn’t ever been the type of person to steal a car or break into someone’s house just to fuel his habit. With his luck he’d get caught right away anyway.
“This can’t come as a surprise, Rem, we never even had an active sexlife.”
Sure, fine, maybe they hadn’t. But they had been married for years; university best friends turned adult lovers and confidants turned married at twenty five and divorced at thirty three.
The divorce had at least been simple, easy, just like anything else about their relationship. One second she was there, dying her hair in the tub and staining it all bubblegum pink — the next she was moving out and downloading lesbian dating apps.
Remus munches salad from his little packed lunch. He should be planning his classes whilst having lunch — he refuses to, he’d rather sit here all bent-backed and pretend that the salad actually tastes better, that he isn’t regretting moving across the country to get away from it all. That his new life isn’t sinking his mood just like the old one did.
There’s a knock on his classroom door.
Remus looks up from his sad salad. “Come in?”
The door, covered in prints of Shakespeare plays and old illustrations of Of Mice and Men and other English class classics, opens to reveal the knocker.
Sirius has his hair in a bun today, black strands tied back and into a scrunchy that could rival the cheekiest of cheerleaders’. Other than that he is in his usual all black attire, all except his rainbow colored lanyard which holds his keys and the miniature periodic table keyring.
Sirius smiles. It’s all gray eyes that look like they’re sparkling under the hideous fluorescents and can make even the toughest lunch lady blush.
“Hi Remus, is this a bad time?”
Remus tries to swallow the tightness in his throat.
He can’t really deal with Sirius popping by like this, he’s done it quite frequently since Remus’ first week.
“No, not really,” he says, trying to keep his hands from fiddling and his eyes from darting around the room. “What can I help you with?”
Sirius shrugs, careless and relaxed. “I was just wondering if I could borrow your stapler. Seems like mine’s wandered off.”
Sirius drives a motorbike to school.
Remus saw him get off it in the parking lot not too long ago. It felt like the world stood still or maybe moved in slow motion when Sirius removed his helmet and shook his hair out, kitted out in leather. Then his neck got all hot, for some god forsaken reason, and he had to go splash cold water on his face before facing his students in the first period.
So many of Sirius’ supplies have gone missing in the short time where they have worked together.
“Erhm… Yeah, sure— absolutely,” Remus stumbles through sentences as he stands to go fetch the stapler in the supply closet. He turns the little key and quickly looks over the closet, a bit too aware that Sirius is coming closer; if he isn’t misinterpreting the scuff of boots on the floor.
He grabs the stapler, turns around. “Here.”
Sirius is right behind him, right in front of him now. Looking up at Remus with his easy smile and rows of lovely black lashes and… and… and pink lips.
“Thanks, I’ll give it back as soon as I’m done, okay?”
“Yeah…”
Sirius leaves. Remus has to go sit down, he’s feeling dizzy.
“Are you even attracted to me, Rem? I mean— it’s fine if you aren’t. Maybe I’m not your type or something.”
There was always something hidden in Dora’s words, at least in those words. Remus hadn’t come any closer to figuring them out, not even two years later.
He just sits in his darkening apartment, playing those words over and over whilst watching-but-not-really-watching tv. He should really go over to Sirius’ classroom tomorrow. You know, just to make sure he remembers to give the stapler back. And it has absolutely nothing to do with what Dora said those years ago, nothing at all.
In the following morning, Remus dresses in his good shirt and wrestles with his hair for a touch longer than usual. Why? Don’t worry about it.
He goes into work with a determination and anxiety churning in his belly.
He walks up to Sirius’ classroom, a print of Neil deGrasse Tyson on the door, and knocks.
Deep breath.
Sirius opens the door. Light eyes and smiling lips and an overall undeniably beautiful face.
Stapler, that’s what he’s there for.
“Will you go out with me?”
What?! No!
Remus was supposed to ask about the stapler!
Fuck!
Sirius just looks back up at him, glittering eyes and widening smile. He doesn’t say anything.
Remus tries to backpedal. “The stapler — I really need my stapler, that’s what I meant.”
Sirius just smiles. “So I just missed the point two second window of going out with you?”
There’s cotton in Remus’ ears, ringing in his brain. “No— I mean… Wait— Did you want to go out with me?”
Sirius’ smile looks like it’s almost too big for his face. “I thought you’d never ask.”
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a66-1 · 7 days
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yo what about grumpy simon meets somehow grumpier reader !! maybe at a pub with the lads and she’s with her girls!! just two intimidating idiots <3
Yes!! this is so me as a human lmao..
Grumpy!Simon x Grumpy!Reader
a/n: yay!! second ask!! sorry it took so long, writers block and finals are kicking my ass rn.
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You take a seat at the crowded pub, grumbling into a glass of wine. You've downed two drinks in, what, a couple minutes? Christ, how you're friends have more self control than you blows your mind.
Your friends sit around you, sipping from an assortment of drinks, laughing and talking about. Being the quiet friend definitely has its perks when your friend group is chatty, you get all the tea.
Danny's boyfriend cheated. Again.
Lauren's family is arguing two months too early already for the holidays.
Kadence's dogs are being the death of her and her small apartment.
You were never one to drop how you feel to your whole friend group, or even share more than what happened a couple hours ago. I mean, that's already too much information.
A natural grump. The grinch, Lauren called you. I mean come on, not to be one of those guys, but, your smile is so pretty!
You stand to excuse yourself, to grab another drink. I mean, technically, you should be getting water, but another bourbon sounds real fucking nice..
"Hey can I get..." You trail off when you notice a tall man come up next to you, and order exactly what you were ordering. Rude.
"Bourbon. On the rocks." The guy muttered, throwing down cash to pay for the drink. I rolled my eyes and glanced to the bartender.
"Bourbon too, please. On the rocks." You gave the guy a snide look, and sat down to wait for your drink. The guy cranes his neck up to watch whatever football game was going on, enamored with a bunch of men getting handsy on a flagged play.
"You could've been nicer and waited your turn, asshat." You grumbled, sorta for yourself, and a little for him. He chuckled, turning.
"Me? An asshat? Okay, Ms. I'm-Nice-To-Everyone, get some balls." He shrugged you off, and kept his eyes glued to the TV.
"I didn't say- Jesus, you're a fucking grump." You scoff, before realizing you sound just like Lauren right now.. The guy huffs, and turns to you, and lowers his head to be level with yours.
"I'm the grump? You're the one groveling over a little shove." He rolled his eyes. You mutter under your breath and move a seat away, waiting for your drink with a hand under your chin. You grab you drink when it came, and you moved back to your table.
"Lauren?" You mumble, sipping your drink. She curiously turns to you.
"Yeah?"
"Am I an asshole?" You ask, shoulders slumping.
Lauren stifles a laugh, and nods slightly. "When you're in one of your moods, yeah. Why?"
You groan, rubbing your eyes. "I think I met my match.."
anndddd yeah. a little dabble. inspo has been down. Please request more!
thanks babes...
-a661
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mistydeyes · 9 months
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cardigans - "please don't go, please don't leave me" with ghost?? :,)
Thank for for submitting @corvusmorte ! Literally buckle up bc this is one of many angsty ghost prompts to come (y’all love seeing this man suffer)
link to the prompt list and 1k celebration!
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prompt: cardigans - "please don't go, please don't leave me"
pairing: Simon "Ghost" Riley x gn!reader
warnings: swearing, ANGST, VIOLENCE (emotional and physical), verbal insults, depiction of injury - you have been warned simon is a bad bad boyfriend in this
┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊
As you sat on the couch enjoying a bottle of wine, the last thing you expected was the rhythmic thumping on your door. Your merlot splashed in the glass as you rushed to answer. “Jesus I’m coming,” you yelled as the pounds grew louder. On the other side of the door, you were met with the tired and darkened gaze of your boyfriend. The air smelled of bourbon and cigarette smoke as you looked up at him. “Simon,” you gasped slightly as he pushed past you into the shared flat, “where have you been?” Your question was met with empty air as he slumped his large body across the couch. “Didn’t I tell you to never fucking ask me about work,” he angrily replied as you saw him grip your wine bottle and drink it like water. There were only two rules in your relationship. 1. Never leave fights unresolved (especially before deployment) and 2. Never ask about what happens once Simon walks out the door. It was as if he changed from the quiet, civilian Simon to the cold hearted and emotionally-charged Ghost, once he left.
“I’m sorry, I just was so worried,” you said as you locked the door and sat on the loveseat adjacent to him, “you hadn’t said how long you’d be gone.” “I just want to rest,” he mumbled and harshly drank from the bottle in his hands. “Do you want anything? I can go out and get you some food?” you offered but he gave you a pathetic flick of the hand which shut you up. Your fingers anxiously tapped on the frosted glass in your hands. You hated when he came home like this, you never knew how to react and he somehow made you feel at fault for every action you did. “Fuck can you just sit still!” he said through gritted teeth and you couldn’t help but jump in response and cause the crimson wine to coat your clothes. “God you’re such a mess,” he dryly laughed and you hoped this night would end in a drunken stupor. You tried to put your mix of emotions aside as you walked to the kitchen and cleaned yourself up. You couldn’t help but feel a few salty tears fall as you dabbed your clothing. You turned away as you could feel Simon’s presence in the kitchen. You said nothing as he cleaned the bottle to put in the recycling. Despite being drunk and angry, he still held onto his routines. “Do you have another?” he asked in a sudden kind tone but you were too preoccupied to answer.
Wrong choice as your indecision sent him on another drunken argument. “I fucking asked you a question,” he barked and as you turned, he furiously threw the bottle into the sink. The moment it fell, Simon could only watch as the shattered glass coated your hands and forearms. You screamed as your already stained white shirt flickered with more crimson specs. He moved closer to you in a moment of sobriety. “I’m sorry,” he said flatly but you were terrified as you reached for a rag. “Don’t come near me!” you commanded and he stepped back at your shaky voice. You were sobbing as you did your best to release the glass from your arm on the way to the bathroom. He stood silently as he heard your painful tears and the sound of drawers being slammed in an attempt to bandage yourself. Eventually, you emerged with two arms wrapped in gauze and you made a sprint for your phone and shoes. Simon was quicker than you and in an act of desperation, harshly grabbed your wrist. You let out a hoarse scream at the shooting pain and he dropped it as you fought against him. “Please, I didn’t mean to,” he tried to apologize but your ears rang with adrenaline as you pushed past him to the locked door. You fiddled with the lock as you fought through the cuts. As you finally got it open, you could hear him whisper a statement that made you almost turn around. “Please don’t go, please don’t leave me,” he whispered and you ran out the door without hesitation. First was rule two and now rule number one officially broken.
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cryptotheism · 1 year
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was moses a wizard
In Ancient Jewish Magic Prof. Gideon Bohak makes the argument that Moses is explicitly not a wizard. His duel with the pharaoh's magicians was explicitly to make clear that the power of God was superior to that of the Egyptian magicians.
He also makes the argument that "magic" whatever it may mean, is a teachable skill. An argument that I tend to agree with. I think it would be incorrect to classify all Jewish Mythological Figures as magicians.
Like, Honi the Circle Maker wouldn't be able to teach me how to do the stuff he did. Jesus of Nazareth wouldn't be able to teach me how to turn water into wine. That -in my mind- makes them Mystics, not magicians.
But King Solomon? King Solomon could teach me the wisdom of herbs and stones. It's why he's the centerpiece of hundreds of years of magical writing!
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buckymorelikefuckme · 1 month
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I think it would be great! Plus, l have a request. What if, bucky and y/n are getting married (plus y/n is a shy one 🙂) and y/n never drank any alcohol before and on the other hand, bucky, Has already drank alcohol more than he can count. So, they go wine tasting. A week before their wedding and while they're half way doing the wine thing y/n starts to get dizzy and feeling a bit hot. To which she doesn't know that she's starting to get tipsy and bucky notices it. And with that, that means she has a low tolerance in alcohol. And when the wine take its effects, She's all goofy and doing anything without a care in the world even if it's embarrassing herself as if all her shyness is gone
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thanks so much for the prompt and for your patience :) i hope you like it!
bucky barnes x reader
words: 427
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Perhaps, Bucky thinks, he may have misjudged just how much of a lightweight you'd be.
You'd told him early on in your relationship that you didn't drink, not because of any other reason than you being kind of scared of making a fool of yourself. He'd thought it was cute and never pushed you to drink whenever the two of you went out on dates or to hang out with friends.
Now, you're engaged and a week away from the wedding, and the last thing that needed preparing was the wine. It was Natasha’s idea to go to a wine tasting and you were a little unsure, but then Bucky said it could be a sweet, romantic getaway before the big day. You agreed easily after that.
And besides, how bad could it really be?
“Jesus, fuck, where's the air-con in this place?” you whine, quite loudly, pulling other people’s attention towards where you and Bucky were seated.
He offers everyone an apologetic smile and turns back to you, rubbing a soothing hand along your back. “Baby, we’re outdoors. There isn't any air conditioning.”
You whine again, head flopping onto his shoulder. “But it's so hot, Bucky.”
“I think you're just a little drunk, baby,” he replies with a soft laugh.
You only had a glass and a half before you started complaining about your cheeks feeling hot, and another two glasses for your eyes to go glassy. He's been fascinated, in all honesty. He's never seen someone get drunk so fast.
“Nuh-uh!” you protest, lifting your head to blink heavy lidded eyes at him.
Bucky grins and brushes your hair away from your face. “Okay,” he agrees, placating, “but maybe we should head back to the hotel.”
You blink at him again and then you smile, slow and suggestive, tilting your chin down as you slide a hand high up on his thigh.
“Yeah? Wanna do naughty things to me?”
He catches your hand before it reaches his groin, torn between laughing and groaning. “Not when you're drunk,” he retorts gently.
Inexplicably, your eyes begin to water. “You don't want me?” you ask in a pitiful tone.
“I always want you, baby,” Bucky responds immediately. “You know you drive me crazy, can hardly control myself around you. “
“Oh,” you beam, tears forgotten. You lean into his space and plant a wet, messy kiss on his lips. “Okay. Take me home, big guy.”
When you wake up the next morning, hungover and pouting, you make Bucky swear to keep you away from the wine during the reception.
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theriverbeyond · 8 months
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Love your post about Gideon inadvertently breaking John's pattern of lashing out when she can't be used, and it made me wonder- what would John keeping the home fires burning for the Earth have looked like?
omg ty so much! ok so. things John could do to keep the home fires burning:
(tell the world) STOP (the war) the nuclear standoff. put those things away!!! better yet. destroy them.
let the trillionares go. they did it. it's done. your home is still here and can still be saved. let them go!!!!!!
MORE THAN THAT. if all the rich capitalists are the ones who ruined so many things, and now a bunch of them are GONE, then a lot of their influence is also gone!!! the oligarchs are gone baybey!!! John could step into the power vacum they left and force the hands of governments to like, do good things. force them to give everyone food and healthcare and stop fossil fuels. he could be a climate influencer online to dramatically influence the greater culture, instead of just doing that weird necro cult shit on twitch.
John cracked the code with the death of C--, and drank a BUNCH of deaths at the compound, so he Understands now. he wouldn't end up as powerful as he did when he Ate Alecto, but he cracked the code when he saw (& grabbed) the soul. this means he likely could...
BRING BACK HIS FRIENDS!!! The bodies are still there and he is literally holding the souls. bring them back and put the souls inside. they keep him sane and they love him and they have ideas
FEED EVERYONE. a big problem he mentioned was the planet running out of resources, but you're the lifedeath guy now. you cracked the CODE!!! it is time to go full jesus on the world. make wine from water and more bread from just one bread. take a fish and make it 100 fish. take an oil spill and turn it into nutrients for the fish. etc.
USE his new deathlife powers to do other things like, fix the oceans. fix the ozone. transform the big piles of garbage into something more readily taken by the sea. plant new sequioas and giant cacti and then accelerate their growth by 1000 years so they can provide for all their living things. inject biodiversity into endangered species and prevent their deaths by boats and deforestation etc. Yeah some of them might be teeth mutants, but when god sings with his creations, will a tooth mutant not be part of the choir?
to be evil but for the greater good, John could also kill and then puppet other world leaders and then more aggressively force institutional climate change, and end things like overfishing and Shein. i don't know if he is politically smart enough to finesse this but idk if he had his friends it could be a group effort. yeah he would still be one shade of evil dictator but it could NOT be worse than exploding the solar system.
i think the last point especially, like. in general, not exploding the world would be better than exploding the world. he could have done kind of a bad job of keeping the home fires burning and it would have still been way better than what he DID, which was kill everyone else and then himself
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joesheistyy · 1 year
Text
Cold Feet
two lil blurbs :)
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The chilly Cincinnati weather wasn't welcome when it came to you. While you preferred to be cold, you didn't mean THIS cold.
It was a chilly Sunday evening in the off season and you and Joe were spending it on the couch. Could he afford to turn up the heat? Yes. Was he raised to keep it cool even in the winter? Also yes.
The house was kept at a brisk 65 degrees. If it were that way during the warm months, you'd love it. But when it was 28 degrees outside? Absolutely not.
You had been up and around the kitchen, gathering snacks and drinks to have a small movie night. The hardwood floor felt like you were walking on ice, even when wearing socks. Your XL nike crewneck and Christmas plaid pajama pants clad your body. Your bare feet were freezing.
After you placed a bowl of popcorn and two Angry Orchards on the coffee table, you grabbed your favorite cozy blanket. Joe was sitting on the middle cushion of the couch. You were most comfortable when your back was against the arm rest and your legs were draped over Joe's lap.
You sat down, throwing the blanket over your body. Your knees were propped up as you tucked your feet under Joe's thighs.
"Jesus Christ y/n, your feet are so fucking cold," Joe whined as he felt your icicle feet through his sweats.
"Yeah cause someone won't turn up the heat," you replied sassily.
"Can't you just put on socks?" he responded, growing an attitude.
"I mean yes, but that's a lot of work and your thighs are warm," you stated simply with a shrug.
"y/l/n, just put on some damn socks,"
-------
Spring was just around the corner, but you were in the staple midwest second winter phase. The day had been nice and in the mid 50's. You spent your day in the sunlight of the window on the couch reading your favorite book.
As the day progressed and the sun went down, the wind made the nice evening turn brisk. Joe had been out training most of the day, so he had become acclimated to the outdoor weather.
The house stayed cool and you moved away from the window that let in a slight draft. Joe arrived home after dinner time having eaten with the team at the stadium. You cooked yourself a bowl of tortellini with sautéed spinach and a glass of wine. The boiling water helped to heat up the kitchen a bit.
After Joe's arrival home, he made his way upstairs to take a hot shower. You both were in the mood to go to bed early.
Keeping the house cool at night was the right way to go for Joe to get a good night's sleep. Most of the time you could handle it because Joe was your own personal furnace, but some nights, your feet were too cold to sleep.
After you both had done your night time routines, you climbed under the blankets. Joe was partially sat up while he checked his phone one more time before bed. You, however, were all snuggled in.
"Joey lay down, I'm cold," you whined and tugged at his arm.
"Fine fine, c'mere you little icicle," he said as he plugged in his phone and turned off his bedside lamp.
After a couple minutes of snuggles, Joe turned away to face the wall, the way he normally sleeps.
You were still cold, especially once Joe turned over. His breaths evened out and you knew he was sleeping. Disrupting his sleep was something you hated to do, but you needed his warmth. He knew that if your feet were cold, you couldn't sleep.
You mischievously tucked your feet in-between his calfs. He stirred a bit, letting out a string of curse words as he felt your cold feet.
"Babe, put on some socks or something," Joe spoke, still half asleep.
"But you know I hate sleeping with socks on, and you're just so warm," you said as you snuggled yourself into his back.
"Fine, but this won't happen next time," Joe said before falling back asleep.
You smiled into his back, slowly but surely starting to warm up.
------
My house is freezing so I came up with these lil ideas! I hope y’all enjoyed!! <3 much love
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greenerteacups · 4 days
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I'm on my nth re-read of books 1-4, and I keep finding new things to be delighted by, on top of the old reliable lines that make me giggle every time. Like in book 4:
“Yeah,” said Harry, whose success had overdosed him with optimism. “Hey, think about this: you reckon I can just Banish the water and walk down?”
“Oh, bless, he thinks he’s Moses.”
How does (presumably pagan-ish or non-religious based on holiday celebrations) Draco know about Moses? Does he think Moses is a wizard??? I mean... he DID accomplish several miracles with a big stick. Any of the implications here make me cackle
Oh this is awesome, I've been wanting to talk about this for ages: I think wizards know what the Bible is! And Christianity, and Judaism and Islam, and I think there are practicing members of all of those religions (and more!) in the Wizarding World. Here's why.
The Bible (Old Testament specifically — Draco's references lean towards the OT because that's the broader cultural referent, it's the common glue of the Bible/Quran/Torah and if wizards know any Abrahamic text, it's that) is a huge, ubiquitous, world-shaping cultural text that was thousands of years old before the International Statute of Secrecy. The date of 1692 for the SOS means that any muggle culture before the 17th century is fair game, even if it's not accepted by wizards. So that's why I think atheist/agnostic/pagan wizards should still have at least referential familiarity with it.
The fact that wizards celebrate Christmas (NOT Yule, although obviously in Lionheart they do both) tells me that there is at least vestigial religious belief in the population. Expressions like "Merlin" in place of "God" tells me that wizards probably have a different relationship with it — Merlin's generally treated as a kind of prophet? — which is giving "splinter sect of Christianity defined by the emergence of Merlin as a separate prophet for wizards," but I'm not gonna spiral too far into that headcanon, because this is a lore analysis post. But that's my working idea, here.
The first-order response to the "what about magic?" problem is: Not everything that happens in the Bible can be explained by the Harry Potter magic system. Water into wine, sure. Resurrection? Impossible, as far as 99% of wizards know. Harry Potter is the only person we know of to be fully resurrected, and even he's never technically full-dead. Moses parting the Red Sea? I mean, we can imagine spells that would do it, but think about how much water is in the fucking sea! We don't see anything of nearly that scope happen in the series. And what about manna? We know for a fact that you can't use magic to make food!
But let's sidebar that, and drill down on what you can explain. Water into wine. Curing the sick. Okay, cool. There's still a big difference between "established in-universe ability that has been ritualized and turned into technology" and "literal miracles." Walk on water? Sure, you could probably perform a spell for that. But does Jesus? Do we know, for a fact, that he had a wand, or that he cast a spell? Had the spell for that been invented yet? Are you even sure he was a wizard? Can we prove it? Moreover, would it matter?
This leads me to my bigger point about the nature of religious belief: if you believe the dude's divine, having magic doesn't change anything, right? Because he's still the son of God. Christians don't believe Jesus was divine because he performed the miracles; they believe he was divine and so performed the miracles. There are many different IRL-theological stances on how much of the supernatural stuff in the Bible "actually happened," and you can be a skeptic about the scientific facets while still subscribing to its broader philosophical and religious claims about God.
Even if you take Jesus and other Abrahamic characters out of the question, there's still a place for religion in wizarding society, because of the afterlife. With the exception of ghosts (who by their account have never been fully "dead," and so don't know it) and inferi, the relation between the wizarding world and the afterlife is a one-way conduit. That means there's still plenty of room for wizards to adopt religious beliefs specifically about the afterlife, and religion would still play a social role in defining how people approached those topics.
Finally, the pagan elements of the Harry Potter series read less to me as an espousal of sincere religious conviction and more as a ritualistic vestige of prehistorical magical practices. Since the universe's magic draws heavily on pagan ceremonies — especially in the realm of potions/herbology/magical creatures — ironically, I can't imagine paganism as a religion in the universe of Harry Potter. Like, it's just straight-up true! It would be like starting a religion around meteorology, or chemistry. There's no element of mystery or divinity involved for faith and belief to fill in the gaps; you know how magic works, and you can be good at it.
What JKR did with the magic system — apparently on accident — was to textually validate huge volumes of pagan practice without invoking any of the associated spiritual or religious beliefs. And since we live for seven years in the mind of a competent, practicing wizard who does tons of magic without seeming to believe in any particular god at all, I have to infer that you don't need to. Rowling has, again, likely not on purpose, built a universe whose central conceit is: "what if the pagans were just straight-up right?" and revealed the answer to be: "well, then it wouldn't be paganism anymore."
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storiesofsvu · 11 months
Text
Love Comes Quietly Ch 10
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Alex Blake x reader warnings: language, alcohol, smut.
You’d taken Alex’s go bag, dumping laundry from both it and yours into the washing machine before dropping hers in her room and retreating back to your own room to refill toiletries and repack clothes to make sure you were ready when the next case hit. As you were pulling out socks your eyes landed on the swimsuit collection in your drawer and Emily’s words floated back into your brain. It was Thursday, normally a night like tonight would mean a glass of wine followed by bed but considering Emily had the team working rather late she’d made the call to come into work for noon. Which meant you had a little bit of leeway with how the rest of your night went.
You could hear Alex puttering around out in the kitchen, you figured she was either putting a drink together or making lunch for tomorrow considering you’d already eaten. You tugged your lip into your mouth, fingers flitting through the swim suits until you revealed the red one. Emily was right, it did make your tits look fantastic and you hadn’t worn it since moving to DC since it was one of the more revealing suits. You had to admit, your body was rather stiff after sleeping in the hotel bed, a soak could help, what was the harm if you just happened to stroll past Alex on your way out?
*
Alex had pulled out a couple of containers of frozen stir fry, placing them in the fridge for lunch on Friday when she noticed a container of strawberries that looked like they were about to go bad. For some reason her first thought was to toss them in with some wine, liquor and juice for sangria and she figured why the hell not. She’d just finished the jug of it, filling a cup with ice to pour one out for herself when she heard your footsteps coming down the hallway from behind her.
“You don’t mind if I use the hot tub do you?” You asked, “my back’s a bit of a mess from that bed.”
“I might join you; those beds were terrible.” She replied with a soft groan, the ache in her lower back seeming to sink in now that she was thinking about it, “sangria?” She asked, finally turning to face you and she all about choked on her drink as she took a sip, her eyes raking up your body and she knew her cheeks were red. “That’s… a new suit.”
“Haven’t worn it in a while.” You shrugged, “and yeah, that looks great.” You walked up to the island, leaning against it and Alex had to tear her eyes away from your chest, perky and pressed even higher by the way you had your arms crossed, “did you make this? I didn’t see a bottle in the fridge.”
“Yeah.” She shot you a half smile, desperately attempting to hold eye contact and not look elsewhere, “easy way to use fruit that’s about to turn.” She slid you a glass and you picked it up, taking a sip.
“Mmm. Delicious.” You pushed off the island, “well, you know where to find me.” With a soft grin you turned, sauntering your way out to the back yard and Alex caught herself staring at your ass, the heat shifting from her cheeks to between her legs.
“Jesus…” she muttered to herself, shaking her head as she tried to get the image of you in that suit out of her brain.
She heard the soft splash of the water from outside and was starting to wonder if maybe a cold shower was a better idea than joining you. She could still feel your lips on hers, taste you on her tongue, her body burning where your hands had trailed across her skin. She nearly jumped when her phone went off, buzzing on the counter and she swiped open a text from Emily.
‘Good work tonight Blake. Added benefit, maybe that kiss helped sort some things out?’
‘If by sorted things out you mean I feel like a horny teenager, then yeah, completely sorted.’
‘It’s a nice night out, go soak in the hot tub and clear your mind.’
Alex rolled her eyes and let out a huff. On any other night that’s likely exactly what she would have done, she often spent evenings out there watching the stars to help sort out her thoughts but Emily had no idea what was going on at the house. She glanced out into the yard for a moment before downing her sangria, if she was going to make a choice, she had to make it now.
*
You glanced up at the sound of the screen door sliding open, smiling up at Alex who almost audibly swore and the sight of your skin glistening in the moonlight, just enough of your chest exposed above the surface. She tossed her towel onto one of the loungers, placing her drink down by the edge of the tub, letting out a satisfied groan as she slipped under the water.
“See, right choice.” You greeted with a chuckle and she nodded.
“You think that for even just one trip they’d book us in at a hotel that didn’t have bricks for beds.”
“They gave us a jet.” You laughed, “I don’t think we’ll be getting much of anything else for the foreseeable future.”
Alex laughed, relaxing back into the seat as she let the water swirl around her, breaking down the stiffness of her muscles and the heat calmed her. It was quiet for a bit, just a playlist echoing from your phone as the two of you wound down from your week, your double case day, trying to think of anything but the feeling of the other’s lips on your skin. There was some small talk, comments on work, thinking about plans for the upcoming weekend, if Emily was dragging you off on any insane adventures or not. You finished your sangria, letting out a little huff, your lips briefly pouting as you put the empty glass down on the ground. Alex was almost done her second one and she sighed softly,
“I should have brought the pitcher out.” Her lips pursed as she glanced back to the screen door.
“Oh don’t worry, I’ll grab it, I’ve been in longer.”
Before she cold protest you were climbing out of the hot tub, briefly patting at yourself with a towel to avoid getting the kitchen floor too wet. If Alex thought the red bikini was a look from heaven she truly wasn’t prepared for the sight of it now. She could barely tear her eyes away from the way the suit was clinging to your body for dear life, nipples hard in the cool night air, peaking through the fabric and all she could think about was wrapping her lips around them. The brief seconds you were in the house she downed the rest of her drink, trying not to watch as you walked back to the tub, refilling both of your glasses before you slipped back under the water. It didn’t go unnoticed that you were significantly closer to her this time. She chose to distract herself by bringing up work,
“You really do a lot of undercover work in your last unit?” She asked and you shrugged.
“On and off. I was one of the younger ones and one of the only girls, it just kinda slid into my lap.”
“You enjoy it?”
“It’s always hit or miss.” You shot her a grin, “though I’d say tonight was a hit.”
“Really?” She felt her cheeks heat slightly, but the sangria was lowering her inhibitions as she grinned back at you.
“Yeah.” You laughed, glancing your gaze as you felt your own cheeks heat, “you know, I won’t lie... that kiss? Easily top three.”
“Oh c’mon.” It was her turn to laugh, “you don’t have to bullshit me.”
“I’m not. I kinda forgot how to breathe for a minute there. You’ve got skill Blake.”
She blushed at the compliment, letting it sink in as she took another sip of her sangria, “well thank you.” She smiled softly across at you, watching the way you were looking at her, “I can think of one complaint though.”
“Hmm?” Your brow furrowed, head tilting in the adorable way she loved so much.
“It’s a shame we were interrupted.” She figured she was already here, she may as well go ahead and take the plunge, there was basically no risk left at this point.
“Yeah.. it was.” You could practically hear your heart thundering in your ears, occupying yourself with your drink as Alex laughed softly, mirroring your movements before she spoke again.
“Well…there is one benefit of being home, no one here to cut in.”
You cocked a brow at her, wondering how much she really meant was she was saying, or if it was just the heightened sensuality of the entire evening, the alcohol making neither of you really care about anything else. But before you could really even consider thinking about it you were gravitating towards her and her arms were tugging you into her lap. There was only a moment of hesitancy before your hands were cupping her cheeks and your lips were on hers again.
A mutual sigh of relief came from both of you as you relaxed even further into her embrace, her arms slipping around you. One of her hands slid up your back, tangling gently into the loose hairs from your messy updo. You would gladly stay just like this for the rest of the night, lips moving with ease and a familiar rhythm together, kissing Alex was all you needed, wrapped in her arms knowing you were exactly where you were meant to be. Her arm wound tighter around you, pulling you closer to her and her lips parted, eagerly accepting your tongue into her mouth. She let out a soft groan at the fruity taste from your shared drinks, the flavour adding to what she was already familiar with of you. It was almost like she had been waiting for this moment her whole life, that whatever had pulled her to you back in that bookstore all those months ago had ultimately been leading to this.
Feeling the freedom of being in private Alex began to let her hands wander, running down your back, returning under the water, drawing patterns onto your skin while she continued to kiss you like her life depended on it. Her hands slowly trailed up your sides, thumbs ghosting up your stomach until they reached the fabric of your bikini. You rocked ever so lightly toward her and she took that as the go ahead, her thumbs brushing over your nipples and you broke the kiss with a small gasp, your eyes fluttering open, gazing across at her as she did it again. Her nose nudged against yours, kissing you again, softly this time as she cupped at your chest and you groaned into the kiss. Her lips kissed the side of your jaw, her nose bumping your chin to the side so she could press tender kisses into the side of your neck, teeth scraping against your skin. Her hands groped at you again and you let out a soft sigh, your eyes falling shut, nearly grinding down against her. She bit into the crook of your neck, tongue lapping out to soothe the burn before she sucked at your skin, her fingers pinching at your nipples through your suit and you whined.
“Christ...” She muttered, feeling herself flutter around nothing at the noises she was pulling from you already. She nipped at your earlobe, breath hot on your even hotter skin when she spoke, “you’re going to be good for mommy, right?” Your eyes shot open as your head tilted back to look at her, your lips parted and eyes wide at the slight smirk on her lips, the brow raised in your direction.
“Yes.” You nodded, already breathless.
“Good.” She smiled, pinching at your side, “up.”
She nudged at your arm and you immediately obliged, letting her guide you from the hot tub, her arms snaking around your waist again as her lips found yours. She carefully backed you to the lounger, gently laying you down on it as she settled half over you, her hands exploring every inch of your body that she could. Out of the water you began to take advantage of having Alex not trapped against the seat, your hands roaming over her warm skin, ghosting up her front, softly groping at her chest. She moaned into the kiss, mirroring your actions on your body as your legs tangled together, gently rocking towards each other. There wasn’t a care in the world from either of you, you were utterly intoxicated with each other.
Alex craved more, needing to really feel you, her arms wound around you, grabbing your ass, urging you to roll your hips toward her and your breath caught in your throat. A hand slipped between your bodies, cupping you through your bikini, you sighed happily into the kiss and Alex eagerly swallowed it down. Your hips ground down against her hand as she rubbed you a few more times before her fingers toyed with the hem of your bottoms. You nipped at her lip, urging her to keep going and her hand found its way underneath, ghosting over your clit and you whined.
You didn’t want her to have the upper hand, not yet, and as desperate as you were for her to touch you, you were absolutely aching to feel her. So you copied her movements, a hand sliding her bottoms to the side to give you access to her pussy. As your fingers slid through her folds she broke the kiss with a gasp, hips rutting towards the touch and you giggled softly, the grin staying on your lips as your eyes cracked open to watch her. Her thumb flicked at your clit and you whimpered,
“More… please.” It was just over a whisper, but the neediness in your eyes was enough to make Alex smirk, her finger tips spreading your wetness around before two fingers sunk into you and you let out a moan, your eyes falling shut once again.
The world ceased to exist as you toyed with each other, fingers plunging into wetness, curling and pumping with ease, lips searching out one another for messy breathless kisses. All you felt was Alex and all she craved was you, free hands tangling into hair, pulling the other closer, as tight as they could to plunge a tongue into their mouth. Whimpers, whines and moans getting louder with each roll of your hips, fire shooting through your bodies as you began to reach your peaks. Wetness dripping from pussies, thighs clenching together in an attempt for some form of relief, bodies rocking in tandem until you were practically panting into each other’s mouths, the ultimate bliss and pleasure settling over you as Alex kissed you softly. Her hand slipped from beneath your suit, gently smoothing back a piece of your mussed up hair and you tugged her closer to you as she kissed you. Her tongue lazily sneaking into your mouth, surging against yours until she broke the kiss, the fire prevalent in her eyes as she looked down at you.
“I need to really see you, let’s get you inside, hmm?”
All you could do was nod, catching her hand in yours as she tugged you up from the lounger and inside the house. Once the patio door was shut behind you it was a flurry of movement and kisses to get you into her room, hands swiftly undoing knots, pushing swimsuit parts off to reveal more skin. Alex snuck into the bedside table and before you knew it she was strapped before you and it was a sight that made you weak in the knees.
She dropped onto the bed, settling on her back, pulling you to her, “oh you sweet girl,” she purred, “how about you come ride mommy’s cock? I want to see those gorgeous tits bounce.”
There was absolutely no hesitation as you climbed onto the bed, leaning over her to kiss her again, tongues nearly battling for dominance as you lined up the toy with your cunt. Sitting up you slipped Alex’s cock into you, sinking down until your hips met hers and you let out a satisfied moan, taking in the feeling of being stretched and so full by her before you began to move. Braced on your knees you raised yourself up until just the tip was left inside you and you started to bounce in her lap, sinking all the way down with each thrust.
The sight of you blissed out combined with the way the base of the toy was pressing on her clit was more than enough to start to bring Alex to her peak yet again. She watched the way your tits swayed, the way your eyes fluttered shut at the sensations, how your hands danced around your body, sliding over your bare skin, pinching at your nipples, grazing across your throat and felt herself pulse. You were an absolute dream and the noises you were making were only urging her on further. She couldn’t resist touching you, her hands sliding up your waist, aching to get her mouth on your tits she sat up, wrapping an arm around your waist as she surged forward. You gasped at the angle, her cock now reaching even deeper inside of you and you could feel the ridges dragging across every inch you desired. Her hips continued to thrust up into you, pulling gasps and moans from you while her lips latched onto your chest, sucking and biting at the tender flesh.
“Oh god Alex…”
“Feel good darling?” She murmured, her words hot on your skin and you let out a whimper.
“Ye- yes mommy…oh fuck!” You let out a yelp when she bit into your skin, your arms tightening around her as heat coursed through your body, pleasure building tighter and tighter. You’d never felt like this before, your skin prickling, body nearly trembling in her arms as Alex fucked you deeper with each push of her hips.
Her lips kissed up your chest, nipping at your collarbone before she made home in the same crook of your neck as earlier, biting you again before her tongue lapped across the spot. She latched on, sucking at your neck as you moaned, louder with each thrust of her cock. She could feel you vibrating in her arms, feel how fast your pulse was going under her mouth, hear how your words were becoming more broken by moans, gasps and breathless whines. She pinched at your nipple, pulling a whimper from you,
“Come for mommy. I know you’re close sweetheart.” She husked into your ear and you felt yourself pulse around her.
“Oh god…oh.. fuck.. fuck!”
Your thighs clenched and you cried out as you felt your juices dribble out around her cock and Alex slowed her thrusts until she sunk into you one last time, her own breathing laboured as she held you to her. You buried your face into the crook of her neck, your breath hot on her skin as your body trembled with pleasure in her arms. Her hands soothed up and down your back slowly, calming you as you came down from your high, her lips softly pressing kisses to your skin.
“Holy shit.” You muttered, a giggle on your lips as you finally pulled your face up, a hand cupping her cheek as you smiled at her, a small laugh etched across her features.
“Worth the wait?” She asked with a smirk and you laughed again, pulling another one from her as you leant down to kiss her gently.
“Fucking absolutely.”
___________________________
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walkswithmyfather · 1 year
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“The next day the great crowd that had come for the festival heard that Jesus was on his way to Jerusalem. They took palm branches and went out to meet him, shouting, “Hosanna!” “Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord!” “Blessed is the king of Israel!” Jesus found a young donkey and sat on it, as it is written: “Do not be afraid, Daughter Zion; see, your king is coming, seated on a donkey’s colt.” At first his disciples did not understand all this. Only after Jesus was glorified did they realize that these things had been written about him and that these things had been done to him. Now the crowd that was with him when he called Lazarus from the tomb and raised him from the dead continued to spread the word. Many people, because they had heard that he had performed this sign, went out to meet him. So the Pharisees said to one another, “See, this is getting us nowhere. Look how the whole world has gone after him!” —John 12:12‭-‬19 (NIV)
“Rejoice greatly, Daughter Zion! Shout, Daughter Jerusalem! See, your king comes to you, righteous and victorious, lowly and riding on a donkey, on a colt, the foal of a donkey. I will take away the chariots from Ephraim and the warhorses from Jerusalem, and the battle bow will be broken. He will proclaim peace to the nations. His rule will extend from sea to sea and from the River to the ends of the earth. As for you, because of the blood of my covenant with you, I will free your prisoners from the waterless pit. Return to your fortress, you prisoners of hope; even now I announce that I will restore twice as much to you.” —Zechariah 9:9‭-‬12 (NIV)
“Easter Explained: An 8-Day Guide to Celebrating Holy Week Devotional. Day 1 - Palm Sunday” By Spoken Gospel:
“For the last 1,600 years, Christians around the world remember the last days of Jesus' life during Holy Week. Today is Palm Sunday. Palm Sunday remembers the day Jesus rode into Jerusalem on a donkey like a rival king to challenge Caesar and his Roman empire.
Like every other empire, Rome controlled its people with the threat of death. But Jesus came to disarm all kings of their favorite weapon by dying and then rising from his grave. Jesus has just performed his seventh and final miracle in John's Gospel. He raised his friend Lazarus from the dead (John 11:43-44). It's final proof that Jesus' Kingship will disarm death and grant life. All of Jesus' miracles hint toward this in some way. Turning water into wine, healing a sick boy, raising a paralytic from his bed, and feeding over 5,000 people with a boy's lunch are all small-scale resurrections. And the people of Israel had an inkling of what all this meant. To them, Jesus was their long-awaited Messiah, the promised King of Israel who would come to heal their bodies, feed their bellies, and take down Rome's deadly rule. And in a very important sense, they were right (John 6:15).
When Jesus saddles a donkey (the traditional beast of kings) and rides into Jerusalem, the people understand it as the coronation ceremony of their death-defeating Messiah. Waving palm branches, a crowd gathers around Jesus and sings from Psalm 118: 'Hosanna! Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord! Blessed is the king of Israel!'
John tells us this is all done to fulfill a prophecy given by Zechariah (Zechariah 9:9-10). Jesus intentionally rides in on a donkey to inflame their hopes that he is the King they have been waiting for. He is the King that can defeat death. He will be victorious over all rival claims to his throne and he will save his people (John 12:15-16). That's what 'hosanna' means''save us.' It's the cry of those who long for the King prophesied by Zechariah.
But unlike other kings, Jesus hasn't come to kill, but to die. Like a seed must be buried before it can become a tree, Jesus must be buried before his Kingdom comes. He must master death by first dying. Anyone who wants to join his Kingdom must be willing to accept his death (John 12:24-26). The whole reason Jesus came to earth wasn't to conquer empires by killing them, but to die under their influence (John 12:27). Jesus rides into Jerusalem like a King, but like a King who knows the only way to defeat death is to die.
That's why these events and teachings don't please everyone, especially the Jewish religious establishment. Many within this religious elite did not believe that Israel's true King could suffer and die. In their minds, a Messiah should fight and win. They can't imagine a king that doesn't wield death. And they don't understand that their greatest threat isn't Rome, but death itself. Unwilling to accept a King who embraces death and suffering, they're forced to oppose and reject him.
Palm Sunday is good news because Jesus announces that he has come to dethrone and disarm the empires of this world through his death. We can either embrace the rival Kingship of Jesus or we can align ourselves with the powers that be. We can accept Jesus' coming death as the way to new life or fight to keep our lives as we know them. We can either pledge allegiance to Jesus' Kingdom or join the religious establishment and reject him.
So I pray that on this Palm Sunday you will accept Jesus as the King who died and was raised to show that death and the empires that wield it are defeated.”
“Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever. Shouts of joy and victory resound in the tents of the righteous: “The Lord’s right hand has done mighty things! The Lord’s right hand is lifted high; the Lord’s right hand has done mighty things!” The stone the builders rejected has become the cornerstone; the Lord has done this, and it is marvelous in our eyes. The Lord is God, and he has made his light shine on us. With boughs in hand, join in the festal procession up to the horns of the altar. You are my God, and I will praise you; you are my God, and I will exalt you. Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever.” —Psalm 118:1‭, ‬15‭-‬16‭, ‬22‭-‬23‭, ‬27‭-‬29 (NIV)
Watch the video of “Easter Explained” here. ]
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