#Please don’t report me I’m just posting memes here that I really like

[echoing-locations]

Ok so more of prince Ambrosius au cuz I think it’s neat

(Also thank you to @goldenheart-supremacy for all your amazing ideas ❤️❤️🥰)

Now I’m this au I’m thinking that Ambrosius is the type of prince who was constantly sneaking away from his guards and he became so good at it that only one was able to keep tabs on him at all times (that being Ballister)

I would say Ambrosius and his parents have a good relationship, they’re just busy cuz their basically running a country

Ambrosius is a master at manipulating the media, he’s been doing practically since he was born, he nows how to be seen by the media only when he wants to be seen

That didn’t stop the media tho, they were convinced the prince was a open book, Ambrosius’s favourite headline being ‘is the prince secretly married!? His guards tell the story!’

Ambrosius and Ballister laughed their asses off at this considering it took place when they were both 16 and Ballister being Ambrosius’s only guard at the time

Ok now back to some main plot things!! Nimona still finds ballister in the tower and still forcefully becomes his sidekick

Although this time Ballister didn’t have any leads on who messed with his armour, so it took him longer to come out of hiding, but it did give him and Nimona time to get to know each other and build that trust

He would probably be on the run and in hiding for like 2 months at least,

Meanwhile the Director woke up at least a day after she was shot, the queen come to visit her and she goes and a rant about “oh how grateful I am that it was me to get hurt and not you or the prince!”

Another meanwhile, Ambrosius begged his father to let him be involved in the search for Ballister. He told his father “this gives me a chance to show my leadership abilities!” The head knight was then told to report to Ambrosius with anything having to do with the search

What Ambrosius really wanted to say to his father is “look I love this man and I would rather not see him with a sword in his chest or a arrow between his eyes, so please let me be in charge!!”

After a bit ballister decided to sneak into the institute to check the security cameras of the armoury and of course Nimona tagged along

They then find the video of the director taking Ballister’s forearm piece and replacing it with the weapon one, they download it to post later

They don’t leave the institute right away because ballister wants to find his armour pice just to be sure, so they sneak into the director’s office and Bal does find the pice

Then the director walks in, Nimona shifts into Todd (cuz yes) and Ballister ducks under her desk

“Sureblade what are you doing here?” “Well..uuhh— I thought heard some one in here and wanted to uhh um- punch them..?” *continuous looks to ballister👀* “Surebalde what are you looking at?”

After the final look to Ballister is made the real Todd walks in to say he lost the prince again and for a second it’s the Spider-Man pointing meme until Ballister jumps over the desk grabbing Nimona and booking it out the door

After running from the kinghts they both hop the wall to the Institute, thinking it’s the one facing the city, when in reality they just hopped the wall to the castle

(I like to think the castle and institute are right beside each other)

“Oh fuck” “wrong wall 😐”

Ballister knows where they are and knows a way out (Ambrosius wasn’t the only one who knew how to sneak away)

On the way out they run into the Prince in one of the more private gardens in the palace.

Ambrosius stands there in shock for a minute, “Ambrosius I uh- please-” “UHHH BOSS I DON’T THINK WE HAVE TIME FOR CHIT CHAT!!!”

And they don’t palace security is approaching fast.

Ballister runs to Ambrosius to give him a ‘hug’ when in reality it’s to give him the armour piece “please believe me, I didn’t mean to hurt anyone. I didn’t mea-” “OK BOSS TIME ITS TO SKEDADDLE!! LOVELY MEETING YOU!!!”

And Nimona grabs Ballister and runs

Ok that’s what i got for now, again feel free to add your own little additions and such I’d be happy to read them!!

#ambrosius goldenloin #ballister boldheart #nimona #prince ambrosius au #ballister x ambrosius #text post #royal au #this took me like 3 days to write

[perhaps-in-anotherdream]

The calls contain important references from Victor’s Glacier Date. So, please make sure you read the date first! ♡

⌚ This post contains detailed spoilers for content yet to be released on the global server! ⌚

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

–

[1st Call]

Victor: I was in a video conference just now and couldn’t pick up your call.

Victor: Anyway, I’d really like to know what on earth is it that happened to a certain someone?

Victor: Why did I receive a bunch of crying and rolling around memes the second I turned on my phone? 

MC: That… it’s actually not that big a deal.

MC: It’s just that I really don’t want to come to work anymore, sob sob sob sob––!

Victor: …

Victor: I seem to have heard the exact words more than once.

Victor: Why is it that every time a vacation ends, a certain someone always adheres to making this complaint without exception?

MC: Because every time I come back to work on the first day, it feels like being in hell!

MC: And especially since we were away for so long this time, it’s really like I’ve returned to the hell inside the hell!

MC: We received feedback on the previous works, and now we have to do follow-ups on them. At the same time, we also have to prepare for new projects.

MC: We still haven’t landed on a schedule regarding when I’ve to go to LFG to submit the quarterly report, so I still have to check with Goldman…

MC: By the way, the report I missed before the vacation, I’ll email it to you later at…

Victor: I remember it’s supposed to be the lunch break at [MC’s Company Name] right now.

MC: Eh?

Victor: I mean, how come a certain someone who says she doesn’t want to work is calling me and still talking about work?

MC: …!!

MC: In fact, there are, of course, also other things outside of work that I want to talk to you about~

MC: For instance… uhh… for instance, I think the sky doesn’t look good today, and there’s a good chance that it might rain!

Victor: It will indeed rain, but it’s gonna stop around 7 pm.

Victor: Have you forgotten? You put the umbrella in my bag in the morning.

MC: Sob sob, it turns out that I already reminded you… I’m dizzy from all the work rush.

MC: …by the way, Pudding hasn’t been eating very actively lately. So, I opened a can for it in the morning, and its appetite seemed to have improved a little~

Victor: That’s just its habitual trick, and it does the same thing every time it gets a craving for canned food.

Victor: And you are the only one it still manages to fool every time.

MC: …that’s because it calls out so pitifully every time! Oh, there’s also…

Victor: All right, no need to rack your brain to divert the subject.

Victor: Just now, I simply wanted to remind you to not get bogged down in work all day long. Occasionally, you should also hop around a little bit and let your mind rest for a while.

Victor: Let’s end the chat here for now. My next meeting is about to start.

Victor: Do you still have to work overtime tonight?

MC: Mm, I need to work over…

Victor: Remember to text me when you’re almost finished. Don’t worry, I’ll bring late-night snacks as comfort.

–

–

[2nd Call]

Starts at – 2:07

–

Victor: Are you working overtime tonight?

MC: No. It just happens that I can get off work on schedule. Just need five more minutes, and I’ll be able to sneak out of here~

Victor: That’s good. Come with me when you’re done, and we’ll go together to pick up the car.

Victor: The 4S store contacted me in the afternoon and said that the maintenance has been done and it’s good to be received today.

MC: Okay!

MC: It drove us through the desert and onto the glaciers. It was indeed time for it to take proper rest.

MC: By the way, has the scratch on the front of the car been repaired too?

Victor: It’s fixed. That was especially taken care of to make it exactly the same as before.

Victor: Or perhaps we could leave it as it was. You know, as a commemoration of a certain dummy’s driving skills.

MC: Victor! There’s no need for this kind of commemoration!

MC: Besides, I got it scruffed just that one time… all my parallel parking was perfect after that!

Victor: It was indeed perfect. It’s just that the duration became directly proportional to the result.

Victor: I had finished reading several emails, and a certain someone was still staring into the rearview mirror, meticulously adjusting the steering wheel.

MC: I was just being cautious, that’s all! Haven’t you heard of the saying, “it is better to be late in this world than to be early in the next”~

Victor: I’ve indeed heard of it. But if I remember correctly, this is a slogan to exhort drivers against running red lights.

Victor: A certain someone trying to use that as a justification for dilly-dallying while parking doesn’t seem very convincing.

MC: CEO Victor, you don’t need to poke holes into such small, insignificant details.

MC: How come you happen to notice all my occasional mistakes... my driving skills clearly aren’t that bad.

MC: You probably don’t know. You were so comfortable that you were actually snoring when we were on the highway~

Victor: ...okay, let’s assume that you’re telling the truth.

MC: What assume... what I said is exactly what happened! I’ll most definitely be the driver next time and wipe clean the “bad” impression you have of me.

MC: But calculating the time, it’ll be quite a while before we go on our next trip...

Victor: It doesn’t need to be quite a while. You can experience that one more time today.

MC: What?

Victor: It doesn’t only have to be the self-drive tours. You can also practice your skill on the route to when we go to work and return home.

Victor: I didn’t drive up here today, all so to give a certain someone the opportunity to “prove herself.”

Victor: All right, five minutes have passed. Come to LFG now. I’ll be waiting for you downstairs.

—

#merry christmas everyone~ 🎄⛄❤️ #hhhhhgnnn i can’t with their all married couple talks akskfjsjk #their phone calls are always like this lol all married couple talks 😂😭🫠💘 #mlqc victor #mlqc li zeyan #mlqc #mr love victor #mr love queen's choice #恋与制作人 #李泽言 #love and producer #mlqc cn #mlqc spoilers #mlqc translations

[bigjimbopickens]

Enough is enough. It’s time to do something.

Hey there.

Do you watch Call Me Kevin? Do you consider yourself part of the community or considering joining? Do you currently use Reddit or are open to using it?

If you answered yes to any of these then please consider reading further. We could possibly use your help with something.

Hi, I’m SnowfallWarning, aka Big Jimbo, and I’ve been an active artist in the CMK community for a few years now with my main place being the community subreddit, r/CallMeKevin. For a while I’ve been noticing a rise of toxic users and things were taken too far when I would be called a pedophile over a fursuit. That incident scared off many people, including me for a while. But I’m wanting to come back and try to make things better, but I can’t do it alone. Which is why I’ve organized this:

The totally-a-coincidence-that-a-bunch-of-people-start-posting-on-that-subreddit! I was told by the mods we can’t call it a raid at all or imply it is one otherwise the automod will delete everyone’s posts.

And yes I did get permission to do this but only on one condition, which I’ll explain shortly.

What’s happening?

Basically I’m just organizing people to all start sharing more positive and creative stuff on the subreddit in hopes of reviving it and outnumbering the bad users, similar to the Jacksepticeye subreddit.

How to join:

No need to ask or anything, just follow the rules and you’ll be fine. Though you do need a Reddit account.

When:

It starts December 28 and goes for as long as needed. You do not need to be ready on that day, you may participate whenever.

The Themes:

The themes are positivity, creativity and cringe culture. Basically, anything wholesome (whether it be nice or aggressive and/or dark) that you created will work. The cringe culture theme is optional, but I’m encouraging things like crossovers, AUs, fanfics and fan-made fursonas with that. Y’know, regular fandom things. Cringe culture is rooted in ableism and really needs to be left in 2017. Once you accept that you’re cringe you can truly be free.

The Rules:

Please follow these otherwise I’ll also be in trouble too. It’s the one condition I was given for this to be able to happen. These rules can also be found on the subreddit.

Posts must be related to CMK in some way.

Posts and comments must follow the site-wide rules.

No spamming or advertising.

No low-effort posts.

No look-alikes.

No rehosts of old channel content.

No NSFW content.

No photos of comment threads of CMK fans in the wild. Kevin isn’t an obscure Youtuber (unless you live in Canada).

No searching for frogs.

No reposts.

Those were the subreddit rules, now these are ones I’ve added that participants will also have to follow:

Posts must fit the theme in some way. I intentionally made it vague so almost anything could fit.

You need a Reddit account. You may make a throwaway for this. You can still post your stuff off-site too.

No breaking boundaries. Don’t make something that’ll make others uncomfortable.

No more than one post per day. We aren’t here to spam.

Do not call it a raid. The automod will take you down if you do.

Your post should be approved by me, though it is optional. I’m just another level of quality control, if it can get through me it’ll get through the submission list too.

Your post must be something you made.

No AI generated content.

If you’re experiencing issues do not harass the mods.

Only report comments if they’re taking things too far.

Now some things that are non-requirements:

You do not need to be an artist to join. Memes and appreciation posts will work as well. Moral support is also good too.

Your post doesn’t need to be a drawing either. Any form is art is allowed, just as long as you either made/edited it and put effort into it. Though if you’re doing edits please get permission if you use other people’s artwork.

You don’t need to be ready on December 28th, that’s just the starting date. No pressure.

You also don’t need to continue participating if you don’t wish. You can post once and be done.

If you’ve never posted to r/CallMeKevin before your post will have to be manually approved first. This process may take a while because sometimes posts get missed in the spam posts. If you’re concerned your post might’ve been missed then do not hesitate to contact the mods with a link to your submission. It happens. Once your post is approved you are able to post freely on the subreddit.

TLDR:

Subreddit got bad, I have plan to change that by encouraging people to use it more frequently in hopes of outnumbering the bad users.

Hopefully everything goes well. I haven’t been having good luck recently so this better not go wrong either. If you have any questions please do ask.

See y’all there, maybe.

#callmekevin #call me kevin #cmk

[patronizing]

can people on instagram stop sexualizing the post i made when i was 14 (the one about my teacher roleplaying with me in a formal email)

it’s really getting on my nerves.

it’s why i’m barely active here. that joke was meant to stay in my circle my freshman year with friends i had on here in my freshman year of high school. it wasn’t even meant to go viral.

and anyway now that it is getting reposted, i would expect people to have the human decency not to sexualize a post when they don’t know op’s age. but i was fourteen, so kindly keep your freakish comments to yourself.

not to mention the context of the email was me venting about my recent suicide attempt, at the time, and my teacher saying “the thing about linear time” to talk about recovery isn’t linear.

you are making suggestive student x teacher jokes about a kid telling a teacher they just tried to kill themselves.

i’ve already dmed big meme account admins to take down the posts of me or moderate comments, but not shockingly, i get no response. anyway, if you see that “meme” being reposted, please mass report it if you can. seeing people make sexual jokes about it disgusts me and i’ve been seeing it more and more recently and that freaks me out.

it’s not “self-centred” to establish boundaries like that. doing the online version of making sexual jokes towards a teenager and then going “i didn’t know her age!” when someone calls you out on it (when you should’ve checked beforehand regardless) is still bad, actually. you shouldn’t make jokes like that when you don’t know the age of who you’re making those jokes about. i’ve already deleted the post off this account to try and stop it from spreading but that hasn’t worked. not to mention that i’m a CSA survivor, so being sexualized without my consent freaks me out.

fuck people sexualizing my suicide attempt at 14.

that’s all.

#important #psa #◞ personal.txt ⋅ #meme #funny #patronizing #◞ patronizing.txt ⋅ #patronizing.txt #instagram #social media #funny stuff #funny post #funny meme #memes #!!! #mental health #mental health awareness #not to mention #that i’m a CSA survivor #so being sexualized #freaks me out #textpost #text post #shit post #tumblr heritage

[70eeznutz]

i’m gonna make a better intro/pinned post bc fuck it

i interact from @evervirescent, i also run a dragonvale blog @the-obsidian-equinox

about me

pronoun page

you can call me Virescent or Hades

neither are my legal name, Hades is a nickname someone gave me a long time ago bc it sounds similar to my legal name and i realized it works well online

genderfluid she/he/they

(i often get confused if someone switches between different pronouns really fast when referring to the same person if multiple people are being mentioned. also i’m afab so i’m most used to she/her but i really have no preference. i don’t mind if you only use one pronoun for me, especially if that makes it easier for you)

adult (born in 2004)

pacific time zone (california)

white & grew up upper middle class with good parents, so please educate me if there’s something i wouldn’t understand!

autistic

mentally ill, but no personality or psychotic disorders

i do have a few triggers but they’re very specific

as an attempt survivor, i have no tolerance for telling someone to take their own life. it doesn’t matter how universally hated that person might be. if i see someone do this, i will block and report them, unless i can clearly tell it’s a joke. i would also prefer if people don’t make those jokes around me unless i’ve given the okay.

blog content

in theory i can write and draw but i almost never make fan content for anxiety reasons IM DOING IT GUYS!! IM GODDAMN DOING IT!!

i usually just post memes or talk about xfohv and algebralians a normal amount

i might talk or reblog about other object shows too. occasionally.

i try to tag things that may be uncomfortable or triggering but i do not do a perfect job. if you need me to tag something please leave a reply to the post in question

sometimes I misspell words or use slang and abbreviations that likely won’t work in a translator, so if you would like me to write something in a way that’s easier to translate, just let me know!

i don’t kin or simp for any characters but i can project onto them really really hard

my favorite posts will be tagged with #pinned to the fridge

my favorite ships are sevensix, 4X, nineflop, and three x five

i also love queerplatonic eight x ten

if you want to know the exact details of everything i ship and in what ways you can go to #xfohv ship chart but be warned as i use homestuck concepts

you can repost my memes just don’t claim they’re yours (i actually get excited when i see smth i made somewhere else)

on the topic of discourse/etc (don’t worry!)

i try my best to keep an open mind and see from the perspective of all sides of various topics

i will not disclose my stance on any topics because i want to keep my blog discourse free, and i also want to interact with people of different opinions so i can privately learn and understand everyone better. this does still mean i have sides i agree and disagree with, but these aren’t set in stone and aren’t relevant right now.

i believe no one actually wants to be the bad guy and most people are only trying to help, so we should all work together to find out how to help as many people as we can. we should discuss instead of argue, and mutually work toward fully understanding these topics

i will still block people who go out of their way to harass or attack others ESPECIALLY if they encourage harm on anyone

needless to say, i have no DNI, but you still might not want to follow me if you’re not comfortable with the above information. i don’t want anyone to be uncomfortable here.

this post may be updated in the future if i think of something i want to add but for now that’s it

[yogurtlid10000]

okay so you probably shouldn’t respond to this message so you aren’t harassed again but… as a fellow NHK artist I’m getting annoyed with that one person who hunts through the NHK tag and tells everyone to put image descriptions. I just don’t think a blind audience is looking at art blogs? And if it isn’t loading, there’s no reason to like it or reblog if you can’t see it. I understand when it’s things like memes or some videos, but I’m getting annoyed when I only post art and I’m told to cater to people who want nothing to do with my art. Again I don’t want them coming after you again so just sending this to let you know you aren’t alone in this :,)

hi anonymous!!!!! so first of all THANK U!! for telling me this!!! yay! and when u say "NHK" i assume you mean... Houseki No Kuni right? (i call it HNK) but uh yes the person who keeps on commenting on my hnk posts about adding image descriptions is something I have encountered personally! i know that image descriptions are used for blind or visually impaired audiences and a device can read out loud the caption so that people can see it.... Ok so anyway the person kept on asking me in my comments but I did explain to them my own reasons for not putting them! Ill put them here too... (please respect my opinion and yada yada) ok 1) it's my choice and my art, and I don't believe im actively being discriminative by not putting descriptions! I promise you that I am not discriminatory against blind or visually impaired people. 2) I'm not mainstream nor probably have a large blind audience, so I personally don't see the need for me.

I did explain to this to the person, multiple times in the comments of my hnk posts, but they seemed to ignore my reasoning, and continued to ask, so I felt uncomfortable and I decided to block them! Anyway then they used the anonymous question feature here n tumblr to ask me AGAIN why I didn't put descriptions. I had told them before that I wish they could respect my choice and respect that we have different opinions, and to leave me alone. Going as far to use the anonymous question feature after I had blocked them was kinda.... not it for me, so I decided to ignore their question!! Unfortunately soon after they sent another anonymous question saying that if I did not answer why I don't put image descriptions (which I had answered previously in the comments) they would report me!! SO aight that was enough for me, I didn't feel like telling them again when they clearly weren't very reciprocating, i reported them for uhhh harassment, idk if they reported me because I didnt put descriptions, just wish they could have respected my boundaries.

Really appreciate you telling me that I don't have to post this, but I already blocked them, and also thank u again for telling me im not alone in this

hmmm this turned out a lot longer than i intended! Just wanted to clear up my experience with it, that's all :))) hope u have a good day anonymous, ask me if u have any questionnnss yay yay yay

more phos art soon hopefully :33

[hopeless-orchid]

About

My name is Hope, ironically. I’m 24 and have suffered from BED and binge-restrict cycles since 2014, formally diagnosed in 2017. I’ve also been on and off ED tumblr since 2016. I’m a former nutrition & dietetics student and you’d think I would have a healthy relationship with food as a result... I don’t. Maybe someday, but I’ve relapsed once again, so here we are.

My last blog was silent-orchid. You might remember me for my “Your Favorite Th*nsp0 is Photoshopped” posts and attempts to combat the dangerous health/weight loss misinformation flooding ED tumblr. I got too much attention which ultimately led to people seeing and reporting me, so I got taken down. I’m just going to lay low this time around and keep to myself.

** I don’t post or reblog tsp0, this blog is purely for journaling, venting, and memes I find funny that help me cope.

DNI List

Minors: I know what it’s like to be 15 and addicted to ED tumblr, so please trust me when I say that all you’re gonna find here are unattainable beauty standards, dangerous misinformation regarding health and weight loss, an endless cycle feeling like you’ll never be good enough. I also know that nothing I say will prevent you from being here though, so I just ask that you don’t look at or interact with my blog. I’m not saying I’m okay with 18+ sufferers hanging out in this hellhole, but if I knew I influenced an impressionable minor in any way, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself. I will not report you, but I will block you.

Racists, LGBT-phobes, cisphobes & heterophobes, misogynists, misandrists, TERFS, bodyshamers, any kind of bigot is not welcome here.

DD/LGs, MAPs, lolicons, or any other kind of pedophilic scum.

People who glorify/romanticize eating disorders or treat EDs like a diet or quirky personality trait rather than the mental anguish that they really are.

Anyone who thinks BED isn’t as serious as restrictive/purging EDs.

I’ll likely edit this post over time, but for now, that’s all. Feel free to follow or hit my DMs if you need someone to talk to.

#orchid diary the sequel #c 🦋 #e🦋

[kindauglypikachuicon]

#memes #meme archive #reaction images #Please don’t report me I’m just posting memes here that I really like

[monsterenergysimp]

Permanence

corpse husband x fem!reader 

summary: you meet corpse on a stream and you’re surprised when he reaches out to you 

warnings: cursing, mentions of tattooing

word count: 1.9k

notes: This is proof read but could have missed some stuff. This is my first corpse fic and my first time writing fanfic since I posted that super cringey book on wattpad when I was like 12 or something. I’d appreciate feed back so please reach out to me :)

main blog @itsmysleepover

read part 2 here!

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

You were cleaning up your station so you can get home and stream. You loved your day job as a tattoo artist but you also really enjoyed streaming. It started as a way to promote yourself as an artist and the shop you worked at but it eventually became a really fun way to destress at the end of the week (or day if you were really itching to stream). “Hey Y/N was that your last client?” your boss, KC, asked as she walked to the front of the shop and put new flash drawings on the walls.

“Yes ma’am!” You said back excitedly. You finished cleaning your station and tossed your black gloves in the trash. “And you can’t trick me into staying and taking walk-ins,” you joked with her. She rolled her eyes and walked back into her office “It was one time,” she said as you slid on your jacket. As you walked out your phone buzzed in your pocket and you checked to see who had texted you. It was a message from Sean asking if you were free to play Among Us with him and some other streamers. You replied that you were on your way home right now and totally down. You were excited to see who was playing this time around since their Among Us streams are super entertaining and have gotten really popular.

On your way back you tweeted and posted to your Instagram story that you’d be streaming soon and set up all your stuff once you made it home. After a few minutes, you had a couple of thousand people watching. You entered the discord chat and Sean spoke up. “Everyone this is Y/N she’s sensitive so be gentle.”

“It’s nice to finally meet you guys and I’m not gentle, I'm ruthless,” You say into your mic and notice the chat calling you a liar. Everyone was in the lobby waiting for the game to start. “You sound way too sweet to be ruthless,” Corpse said. The countdown started and you were imposter with Charlie.

“This should be fun,” you told the stream. Yout tried playing strategically but after such a long shift your brain was mush. You saw Poki in nav and killed her then vented into shields. Not long after the body was reported and you were sure you were going to get voted out or at least sussed.

“Where was the body?” Felix asked. “Nav and I didn’t see anyone near there so whoever is imposter must have vented,” Corpse responded. Felix spoke up again. “I think I saw Y/N walk that way and I haven’t seen her since.”

Shit, shit, shit shit. “I’m in shield right now so-” you said trying to defend yourself but Charlie spoke up. “I was doing tasks with her earlier and I saw her walk into shields so she’s safe but I’m still not sure about Rae.” Everyone discussed a bit more and some people, including Corpse, voted for you but Rae got the majority vote and was ejected. You released your breath and kept playing being extra careful.  

“Okay, guys that was super close. Corpse knows and is out to get me,” you said to the chat. You were eventually voted off but one round later victory was written across your screen with your ghost and Charlie’s avatar. “Good game guys,” Corpse said.

“I told you guys I was ruthless!”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

You sat at your station doing nothing because a client had canceled a four-hour session. You were listening to music and sketching some stuff but you were bored out of your mind and you didn’t want to leave in case you got a walk-in. The music got quiet as you received a twitter notification saying someone had messaged you. You reached for your phone and saw you had gotten a dm from Corpse.

C: hey :)

You didn’t know what to respond. You were mostly confused as to why he decided to message you out of the blue. Did he want something? But what would he want?

Y: Hii! This is sudden

C: was i bothering you?

    shit sorry!

Y: Youre fine I wasn’t doing anything rn

C: how has your day been

    i dont usually do stuff like this

Y: Im glad you did im doing better now I was so bored

C: what were you doing that was so terrible

Y: NOTHING! thats the problem :(

C: im sure youll find something to do

You stared at his message. Unsure what to respond.

Y: Im gonna give myself a tattoo

C: what?

    NO!

You tossed the needles you used for your tattoo into the sharps box. “Oh my god you didn’t,” KC said. She noticed the wrap on your calve from the tattoo you just gave yourself out of boredom. “It’s not my fault I didn’t have anything else to do!” You said trying to defend yourself. She sighed and just shook her head. “Just go home business is slow today.” It was raining so the shop probably wasn’t going to get a walk-in anyway and you didn’t have any more clients for the day. It was only 2 pm but you drove home and after making lunch for yourself decided to stream. You weren’t expecting too many people so it was bound to be super chill. Your leg felt sore reminding you of the tattoo. You snapped a quick pic of the fresh jack-o-lantern on the side of your calve and messaged it to Corpse.

Y: [image] it came out nice!

C: thats  super cool actually

    i was concerned why you would just give yourself a tattoo but i found your instagram and       youre super talented

Y: Thank you!

For some reason, it felt strange to just have that be the end of your response.

Y: Im about to start streaming if you wanted to watch

    [link]

C: ill be watching ;)

What’s that supposed to mean?

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

You sat in your apartment watching tv, hand lost in a bag of Doritos, and scrolling through twitter. You had stopped paying attention to the anime playing on the screen since you’ve watched it a hundred times and knew you wouldn’t miss anything. It was Saturday and you usually take those days off. Take the time to do chores or meet up with some friends but today you felt like not doing any of those things. As you continue your endless scroll (not helping the twitter addiction you told yourself you’d try to get a handle on) you got a message from Corpse.

C: wanna talk?

You looked down at the message unsure of how to answer. It was a simple yes or no and the obvious answer was yes. You and Corpse had started talking more regularly. You still didn’t have each other’s phone numbers but it was fine. Your conversations weren’t too big-- just you sending him memes, tiktoks, and telling him how much you liked the songs he would drop. Or him complimenting a tattoo you did. Sometimes he’d message you during streams telling you funny stuff his fans would say in the chat and you’d do the same. You learned a bit about each other but nothing too deep or serious. Like how you two lived a few cities away and you both really liked Donnie Darko. When Sean first invited you to that game out of everyone else there you were most excited to meet Corpse. He’s just so sweet and funny. Of course, you’d love to talk to him but you were also itching to talk to him and the last thing you’d ever want to do was make him uncomfortable.

Y: Yeah id love to talk

Here goes nothing.

Y: Wanna facetime or something?

     No pressure or anything it could even be a regular call

     I think facetime is just my default lol

You sent those last two messages quickly after you had sent the first. You wished you could know what he was thinking. It was killing you to think you had turned him off from talking to you completely. You put your phone down on the couch and went to wash your hand of Dorito dust. When you got back from the kitchen you turned off the tv and tossed yourself onto the couch.

Still no message.

Why am I so fucking stupid?  

Just as you were standing up to stretch from sitting on the couch all day your phone buzzed. You reached for it fast and looked to see that it was him. You became super excited still not even knowing what the message said. It could have told you to never talk to him again for all you knew.

C: sure lets facetime

    xxx-xxx-xxxx

You had his phone number. You added him to your small but growing contact list and called. You sat on your couch waiting for a response when he finally picked up the screen was black. It didn’t upset you; you kind of expected it and didn’t care what he had to do to make himself more comfortable during this call.

“Hey,” he said. His voice was raspier than usual.

“Did you just wake up?” You asked and looked at the time. It was about a little past noon and you had only eaten Doritos all day. Shit, you should probably make a decent meal.

“Not that long ago but yeah,” he responded and giggled. That giggle.

“Well, I’ve eaten nothing but Doritos all day while rewatching Ouran High School Host Club, so you’re welcome to join me as I make myself something to eat.”

“Sounds like fun; what are we eating?”

“I don’t know yet,” You said as you stood up and made your way to the kitchen. You opened the pantry and looked. You noticed a can of diced tomatoes and reached for it then checked the expiration date. It was still good. On your counter were some onions and garlic. “How about some tomato soup?”

“Sounds delicious.” you smiled at Corpse and your phone screen not knowing if he was also looking at his screen or not. “You’re really pretty-- you know that?”

“Thanks, but you don’t have to--”

“I’ve already told you what an incredible artist you are so many times I bet you’re tired of hearing it, but you already know what a talented artist you are.”

“That is very kind of you Corpse,” you said to him bashfully as you chopped the onion and opened the can of tomatoes. “But once again you don’t have to reach so far to compliment me.”

“I’m not reaching you are talented and beautiful and--”

“I thought I was pretty.” You could hear him chuckle with a smile on his face. “You’re both,” he said. You could feel your face getting warm from blushing.

“Fuck you you’re making me blush. My face is all hot and stuff.”

He laughed at how flustered you got. “That’s the cutest thing ever.”

You didn’t know how to respond so you just put some olive oil in a pot and tossed in your onions. It became silent but it was a comfortable silence. You turned the stove on and watched the flame for a few seconds. “If it was dark we could pretend we were together and having a bonfire or something,” you said to the phone as you turned the camera to show him the flame (still not 100 percent sure if he was looking at you or not).

“I’ll put it on the list of things to do when you visit me someday.”

#corpse husband #corpse husband x reader #corpse husband imagine #corpse husband imagines #corpse husband x y/n #youtubers #caffeinated ramblings

[uwuwriting]

Breaking in w/ Hawks, Shoto and Dabi

Request: I read another post about ppl breaking in your shared house with the boys not knowing that you are inside and hurting you and I was like well this would be interesting with their kids in the mix. So i'm here to provide you with the following request ppl breaking in and immobilizing you while you're still awake and they try to go into your kids’ room with Shoto, Hawks and maybe Dabi or Aizawa- anonymous 

Oh this is a nice little concept. It's very interesting. I’m happy to deliver. I have been devastated by chapter 290, if anyone hurts Shoto imma start a riot and if Dabi doesn’t kill Endeavor i will. I’m thinking of making a double post today so this one and a kny post but we’ll see. Love ya. 💖💖💖

masterlist

rules

warning: cursing, mentions of blood, crying but fluff in the end. 

Hawks/Keigo Takami

-You were waiting for Keigo to come home after a long day. 

-The twins were a nightmare to put to bed today and you were exhausted. 

-Both of them wanted Keigo to tuck them in for some weird reason and they just wouldn’t accept your cuddles or attempts. 

-So after a tiresome two hours of trying and failing to calm them down you called your husband on facetime and they went to bed. 

- “I’ll be home soon, do you want me to bring you anything?”

- “No, no just you.” 

-So after taking a shower and checking on the kids you relaxed on the couch, turning on the TV while scrolling though tik tok. 

-Not even half an hour later you heard jiggling coming through the door. 

-Assuming it was Keigo you got up and went to greet him but who you met at the entrance of your house was a complete stranger. 

-You and the two bulgars stared at each other for a solid minute before you scrambled to get to the kids’ room and lock yourself in there. 

-But one of them tackled you to the floor before you could reach the pastel colored door and pinned you down, binding your hands with a cloth. 

- “I thought you said he wasn’t here man? What is this?”

-They had tied your legs to a chair, putting a makeshift gag in your mouth so you wouldn’t scream as they bickered back and forth. 

-Your eyes kept darting from the front door to your kids’ room.

-He said he was almost home, he should be here at any moment. 

- “Just stick to the plan, she doesn’t change anything.”

- “Doesn’t change anything? You tackled the n. 2 heros’ partner and you think that nothing is gonna happen?”

-You couldn’t care less about their words as you saw the light of the baby monitor light up.

-Eyes widening, you tried to get out of your  restraints to turn it off but to no avail, the soft babbles of your son could be heard coming from the device sending the whole room into an uncomfortable silence. 

-Before you know it, the one that tackled you pushed his partner towards you. 

- “Keep her in check while I go pay a visit to the other room.” 

-Managing to get the gag out of your mouth, your eyes frantic, you tried to reason with him. 

- “I’ll give you whatever you want just stay away from that door, please.” 

- “The number 2 hero has plenty of money. I bet he would be willing to give a handsome amount for that brat in there. What do you say babycakes? 

- “Dude you’re taking it too far-” 

- “Stay away from them!” 

-You realized your mistake a little too late, the new information making the man's eyes light up.

-Two cries came from the twins’ room due to the commotion and your panic rose. 

-But then you saw it. 

-The single feather hovering over the mans’ head, as red and vibrant as ever. 

-You let out a sigh of relief as a wave of red feathers flooded your living room, cutting you free from your restraints. 

-Without missing a beat you sprinted to the door, stepping inside and locking it. 

-Both of them were awake and teary eyed but at the sight of you they calmed down a bit. 

-Taking them out of their cribs, you sat in the far corner with both of them in your lap waiting for the moment Keigo would knock on your door. 

-One would assume that being part of the hero industry, although you weren’t a full blown hero yourself, mere bulgars wouldn’t really faze you. 

-In reality you hadn’t been afraid for your own life, you couldn’t care less about yourself at that moment, but when you realized that they knew about the twins everything slowly fell apart.  

-After what seemed like an eternity a soft knock came from the locked door. 

- “Y/N, dove, open up.”

-Raising to your feet, you almost ripped the door handle out of position in your rush. 

-Once Keigo came into view you didn’t miss a beat before pressing yourself close to his chest, the twins just happy to see their dad. 

- “There are my favorite Takamis!” he said kissing their heads as his wings enclosed all of you. 

- “Dove they are gone, don’t worry. I’m here. We’re alright.” 

-The news report the next morning said that two men were found on the top of the police department butt naked. 

Todoroki Shoto

-Poor man had merely gone to get take out. 

-He hadn’t been gone for that long. 

-But apparently the villains had been waiting for him to leave the house so they could go in. 

-You were still inside with your daughters; the twins chasing each other in their matching onesies while you sat on the living room couch with your youngest.

-You heard the front door open suddenly and at first you assumed that Shoto had forgotten his wallet again.

-But the footsteps were too heavy and his voice didn’t echo through the entrance hall. 

-He always said something when he came in and his footsteps have become lighter ever since the girls were born. 

-Sensing that something was off you placed your toddler in her crib and motioned towards the twins. 

- “Stay with your sister and no matter what you hear you do NOT come into the hallway. Understood?”

- “But what-”

- “Rei do I make myself clear?” 

-Nodding their heads they took their seats in front of the crib, Ren squeezing her hand through the bars to gently grab her sister's chubby hand. 

-Taking a deep breath you entered the hallway and lo and behold, two strangers were staring back at you. 

- “Can I help you gentlemen?” 

-After a few seconds the one closest to the door flung himself at you while the other one started digging through his pockets. 

-Swiftly dodging the attack, you grabbed his wrist and swang him with incredible force to the wall, letting go of him as you turned your attention to the other one. 

-And then you felt a sharp pain course up your right leg as a heaviness settled on your chest. 

-The room began to spin while the air was knocked out of your lungs.

-You kneeled down, hand over your heart as you tried to use your quirk. 

-Nothing happened though; it was like you didn’t have one at all. 

- “Quirk cancelling bullets, aren’t they neat?” 

-The man stared down at you as ever so slowly your senses came back at you. 

- “I can still beat your ass even without a quirk.”

- “I don’t think you’ll do that.”

-Angry voices could be heard from the other room before the man you had slammed into the wall appeared again, blood dripping from his nose and onto the snow white hair of your daughter.

-Ren looked at you, tears forming in her eyes as a red flash of hair jumped onto the man. 

-Rei was having none of it.

-Taking that opportunity you kicked the one in front of you in the groin before separating the girls from the other, sprinting into the living room, closing the sliding doors behind you. 

-Laying the girls on the couch you grabbed one of the fireplace tools and got into a fighting position. 

-Soon enough the door opened revealing none other than Shoto himself.

- “Are you all alright? Did they hurt you?”

-He looked absolutely disheveled, his hair going in different directions as his gaze frantically scanned all four of you, his eyes lingering at your slightly raised leg. 

-The twins hopped off the couch and tackled his legs. 

-Shoto crouched down hugging them both tightly as they started to sniffle into their dad’s chest. 

- “T-they hurt mama and t-tried to hurt Ren.”

-He shot you a look but you waved him off, deciding to instead check on the baby before joining them on the living room floor. 

- “I won’t let them touch you ever again, even if it's the last thing I do.”

Dabi/Touya Todoroki *I ain't never letting this go*

-In reality the dudes didn’t know you were preggos. 

-You were too early on so you couldn’t tell you were preggo but still. 

-They knew that you had something going with Dabi and that’s why they wanted to fuck with you. 

-They thought that they would gain something from trying * key word trying * to take you.

-They were wrong though because a) they got their asses kicked by you and b) they got fried once Dabi found them. 

-You were chilling at Dabis’ while he was out to get you some mustard and a chocolate bar because cravings, when you heard the door open. 

-Immediately you knew it wasn’t Dabi. 

-You would’ve heard him grumbling under his breath about forgetting to take money with him * bc you have been pushing him to pay for stuff every once in a  while* or he would be shouting at you that your disgusting meal had arrived. 

-Neither of these things happened so something was up. 

-Not bothering to get up because you didn’t give two fucks, you waited for whoever stepped inside the apartment to show themselves. 

-You are a villain hun you ain’t about to stress over some crusty ass dude trespassing into your house because you could obliterate his ass from the face of the earth in negative five seconds. 

-Whispers and a frantic “But what if he comes back?” was all you heard before the ground breaking phrase left their mouth. 

- “Who cares? She’s a woman, how strong can she be anyways?”

-You were livid. 

-It might have been a mix of your hormones along with the fact that that was hella sexist but you were ready to beat some crusty ass. 

-Laying down on the couch and pretending to be asleep you waited for them. 

-And soon enough you felt the three figures standing over you. 

- “See easy as hell.” 

- “And hot as hell, please don’t forget that.” 

-All three of them stared down at you like that pikachu meme for a solid minute before scrambling to activate their quirks. 

- “We don’t wanna hurt a pretty girl like you so please don’t cause a fuss.” 

- “Oh baby you think you can hurt me? Please have you seen who I’m dating?” 

-Slowly standing up you flicked your wrist and one of them dropped to the floor. 

-You made your way to the kitchen pouring yourself a glass of water right when one of them ran into you, pinning you to the counter. 

- “Watch it there bud I’m carrying precious carg-”

- “Shut up you fucking slut! You’ll come with us whether you like it or not.” 

- “The only person who can boss me around is not currently in this room so I suggest you let go.” 

- “Yeah you should probably let her go.” 

-At the sound of his deep voice you knew that they were dead men. 

-The one basically on top of you stared at Dabi in horror as you pushed him off of you. 

-Making your way to your boyfriend you gave him a small peck while he rested a hand over you stomach as a silent ‘are you okay?’.

-Shrugging you took the bag from his hands and went into your bedroom, not caring to see what he was about to do to them. 

-You were hungry anyways. 

- “Now which one of you wants to be roasted first?”

TAG TEAM AY:

@the-arcana-fan-fic​ @angelwritings​  @axerrri​ @reinyrei​ @dnarez​ @bemorefiction​ @ezoyscorner​

#hawks #keigo takami #dad hawks #dad keigo takami #hawks x reader #hawks x you #hawks x y/n #hawks x pregnant reader #keigo takami x reader #keigo takami x you #keigo takami x y/n #todoroki #todoroki shoto #todoroki x you #todoroki x y/n #todoroki x reader #shoto x you #shoto x y/n #shoto x reader #dad todoroki #todoroki x pregnant reader #dabi x you #dabi x y/n #dabi x reader #dad dabi #dabi #dabi bnha #dabi is a todoroki #bnha #bnha x you

[hansolmates]

cherry contact |🍒

summary: jihoon has access to all versions of you - your credit score, shopping habits, work emails, even your terrible tinder history. pairing; fbi agent!jihoon x civilian!reader (f) genre/warnings; fluff, crack, it’s really just that “your fbi agent” meme that caused everyone 8 years ago to put tape over their webcams, questionable viewing habits for an fbi agent, language, dick talk, mentions of sex, jihoon has feelings and is confused, he is a PINER, tw—sexual harassment  w/c; 3.3k  a/n; i can’t believe i finished this😭😭 part of meraki’s job collaboration and i’ve been dying to do a svt collab since the dawn of time and finally today’s the day! it’s been a hot moment since i’ve written for jihoon, glad i managed to get those svt writing muscles going! a huge thank you to @merakiiverse​ and @woozisnoots​ for putting this together. readers pls definitely check back on the masterlist linked above to see more of the other talented cwc writers and their rendition of the job prompt!

if you like this fic please consider giving it a like n’share!🤓🖥🤓🖥

“Kevin, 32, works at Kodak,” you scroll further to the description, “I love being tied up and need a dominatrix, have swing at home—no.” Swipe right. 

“Lisa, 24, works at Infinity Dance Studio,” you definitely are weak for athletic ladies, “My hobbies include cuticle care and online shopping! Looking for a sugar daddy or mommy that can spoil me rotten—definitely can’t afford that kind of relationship.” Swipe right. 

“Hansol, 26, works in an art museum,” sounds promising, you love art, “wait, why are all his pictures of him holding fish? Is he inside a fish? Who the heck finds that attractive?” Swipe right. 

“Billiam, 31, works in finance. Needs a bratty baby girl who can triangle,” you grimace, “what is with these guys and stating their kinks from the get-go? Gotta take a girl out to dinner first, and the fuck is a triangle?” 

You swore off Tinder since the dark ages, also known as senior year of college. However you’re in a particular slump, thirst-trapped between needing some serious dick and a committed relationship. You’d prefer the latter, but after a stressful day at work and the fact that it’s the ass crack o’dawn, you’ll take what you can get. 

“Bye Billiam,” you sing-song into your phone, moving to swipe right. 

Except you accidentally drop your phone between your sheets, and when you pick it up you accidentally swipe left. 

“Fuck fuck fuck me with a fuckin’ fuck nugget!” you cry out into oblivion. You’re so glad you live alone at the very least, it stops you from looking like a crazy person when you talk your potential sexipades out. 

Billiam has Super-liked you! 

“No. Nononono—” you bludgeon your head against your pillow, frowning when your phone opens up a chat for you and Billiam. 

Billiam: hi can u check if my dick is too small

You: please, don’t send me a picture of your dick. 

Billiam is typing… 

You: for fuck’s sake—

“—that’s disgusting,” Jihoon curses, and immediately sends out the screenshot for sexual harassment. 

“What’s disgusting?” Mingyu chimes, swiveling in his spinny chair from his side of the room.

“Don’t look,” Jihoon gags, reaching for a bottle of Coca-Cola from the mini-fridge. “You’ll throw up your fried chicken.” 

“My person is a twenty-one year old nympho who also happens to be a incel,” Mingyu chastises to his screen, closing up the eighth tab of BBC porn he’s seen this week, “he doesn’t know how well he’s avoiding the FBI’s eyes,” Mingyu shakes his head, “so I’ve seen some pretty bad shit, but I’ll take your word for it.” 

“No,” he echoes your name like you’ve done the most heinous thing in the world, “no, no! Why would you swipe left on Jackson? You’re way out of his league! He literally looks like he has a pea-sized brain!” 

“He does look like he has half a brain cell,” your voice reverberates through his noise-cancelling headphones, unknowingly agreeing to Jihoon’s passionate throw of anger, “but I’m deprived and desperate, so!” 

It’s like you can hear his sentiments exactly. 

“Literally, you could have any person you want,” Jihoon chastises through his desktop, glaring heavily at your bedroom camera, “you’re wasting your time with these losers!” 

Oblivious, you let yourself dangle across the bed. The camera isn’t the best quality, but Jihoon watches intently at the rise and fall of your chest as you attempt to fall into a fitful sleep. 

“Some yell at screens for soccer,” Minghao says to the air from his cubicle, “some yell for Starcraft, but Jihoon yells for Tinder like it’s an Olympic sport.” 

“Jihoonie,” Mingyu rolls around his chair, resting a long arm over the backrest, “do you have a crush on your civilian?” 

Jihoon immediately swivels around his hair, meeting the amused eyes of Mingyu. “No,” he says sharply, whipping around to glare at his screen. 

He glares harder the longer Mingyu’s simple question sinks in. He doesn’t have a crush on you, he likes you. Jihoon swallows his sigh, wondering why you would want to go as low as Tinder to look for a potential tryst. From your profile, you’re absolutely beautiful and intelligent. You have simple pleasures that match his—a hot cup of tea right after dark, snuggling under a weighted blanket while watching anime, and sleeping in on Sundays.

Unlike him, you don’t see the world through half a dozen lenses and a plethora of information right at your fingertips. No, you’re lucky. 

“Hey can you grab me my water bottle?” Mingyu asks over his shoulder. 

Jihoon thinks nothing of it, leaving his post for the thirty seconds it takes to get to the mini-fridge and grab Mingyu’s Hydroflask. 

“You got a call,” Mingyu says when he plops the bottle on his desk, indicating to the red blinker on Jihoon’s computer. 

It isn’t until he puts on his headphones does he take care to see why his blinker is going off. 

He’s getting an incoming call. From you. 

You’ve been waiting on the line for about two minutes. He lets two additional minutes breeze by because Jihoon is internally screaming. You’re calling again. There’s a fire blazing in his brain, his fingers hot as he twitches against the spacebar of his keyboard. 

From the monitor he can see that you’ve given up on sleep, hands pawing through your drawer so you can take a final swipe at your magenta-tinted lip balm before nesting yourself in the sheets. You’re kicking around as if you don’t have work at 9AM, smacking your lips to apply the shiny salve while you wait for your call to be picked up. 

“Why is my civilian calling me,” it isn’t a question, it’s a thinly veiled indication that Jihoon is ready to fight whoever compromised him like this. 

Mingyu and Minghao fail to answer. That’s okay, he isn’t opposed to killing both if neither fess up. 

It would be so easy for him to ignore the call, or redirect it to another part of the office. Yet he aches to talk to you, for real talk to you. As if you’re just two regular plain-old human beings with normal lives, and as if he didn’t know every nook and cranny about your daily routine and your favorite breakfast foods.

Call it pride, call it confidence, but Jihoon’s been pretty good at games and he hopes prior experience helps him get over this hurdle. Slipping on his headset, he accepts the call and answers in a controlled voice, “This is the local hotline for sexual harassment reports, are you here to report a case?” 

Okay, so this is the closest thing he can get to having a full-fledged conversation with you, so he’ll take it. 

“Hi,” you mumble your name into the phone, and he nearly disintegrates right then and there. It’s different when he can hear your voice directly in his ears, definitively reaching out to him as opposed to being a fly on the wall, “I received an email that a report was sent out for my previous chat as sexual harassment, but I didn’t send out a report.” 

“Yes,” Jihoon replies smoothly, tapping his nails against his thighs, “it’s a new update.” 

“Oh, well thank you,” you reply, and Jihoon sees from the camera that you’re staring at your phone in curiosity. 

“It’s my job,” he says, and the words hold more weight than you think, “are you okay?” 

“Is it also your job to ask how I’m doing?” 

He smiles wryly, and he looks up at the monitor to see how you’ve considerably relaxed on your bed. Your legs dangle in the air, and you’re hugging a mango plushie with all the love in the world. “Not really, but I figured I’d ask. I don’t think I’d be able to recover from a dick that looks like an unhinged toenail.” 

Your laugh flutters in his ears, and his stomach is flip-flopping with more than just his shitty ramen lunch. Your face curls and wrinkles into happiness at the lewd joke, and you rest your chin on your stuffed fruit. 

“I’m okay,” you finally answer, “it’s not the first time I’ve seen subpar dick. But thank you… what’s your name?” 

“Uji,” he says, a codename that he considers as precious as his actual name, “feel free to call or text this number if you’re ever feeling uncomfortable and in distress.” 

“I’ll keep that in mind, good night Uji.” 

“Good night.” 

That wasn’t so bad, Jihoon thinks as he hangs up the phone. He dims the monitors to let you freshen up and get ready for bed, as per your schedule. After tonight, he hopes he can be sated with his curiosity of you. Maybe he needs to follow your plans and open up a dating account or something, he feels that he’s starting to get a little too engrossed in your presence. 

The waning starts today. 

You: help, i’m feeling uncomfortable and in distress

Uji: what is it this time? 

You: i can’t decide which weighted blanket i should get. Will more weight make me feel more comforted or will i accidentally suffocate myself in my sleep? 

The waning of you did not start that night, in fact it never began. Jihoon’s been on edge for weeks, simultaneously teetering between what he calls the high-school equivalent of the talking stage and an absolute catastrophe. 

It started as an accident, you meant to call your friend’s number for cooking help but since the last call before your friends was his, you called Jihoon instead. To your surprise, he knew how to roll out homemade pasta without a pasta machine. You kept him on the call for the entirety of dinner preparation, and he couldn’t help but feel a twinge of pride when your pasta turned out perfect and you were happy and full for the entire night. 

Weeks later, and you’ve been texting each other for shits and giggles. At first you chalk up your insistence that he’s basically Human Google and has the answers to seemingly anything and everything, but over time it seems that you enjoy your daily interactions with him. Whether it be a simple phone call asking how to unclog your drain or a screenshot comparing two different KitchenAids, he’s at your disposal. 

The burner phone he’s been holding as of late is on silent, but he’s able to pick it up immediately. It’s almost intuition, coupled with the way he notices whenever you seem in a pickle and you need to contact him. However he does not have a chance to formulate a reply, as you’re now calling him.

“Couldn’t wait?” he speaks as if you’re familiar with each other, as if you’re friends. Jihoon longs for that so much, he would love to be upgraded to someone other than the IT guy you text for funsies. 

“Yes,” you say, voice laced with determination, “I’m deciding on whether to just like or Super-Like this guy on Light a Flame.” 

Jihoon deflates a little, but steels himself. You’d never want to go on a date with the IT guy, it seems that you enjoy the anonymity of your recent communications. Your conversations are definitely meme-worthy. 

“Who is it?” 

“His name’s Lee Jihoon, 25, works in the FBI.” 

He chokes on his coffee, precious beans from Argentina, and the liquid is flying across his keyboard. 

Pulling up your phone view, it confirms the worst. In a moment of Weakness with a capital W, Jihoon had caved and made a Light a Flame profile the other night. It’s an app reserved for more serious relationships, which means you’ve finally graduated from Tinder. 

“Are you okay?” he wants to cry when he hears you on the other line, genuinely panicked. “Do you need me to send you his profile?” 

“N-no,” he sputters, rubbing a rough napkin from McDonalds over his dripping chin. He thought he privated his profile last week after he realized there was nothing he could do to let loose of you. Turns out that isn’t the case, because you’re currently pursuing his profile and actually kinda-sorta considering him for a potentially serious relationship. 

“C’mon, Uji,” you tease lightly, “you always seem to know what to do. This is your area of expertise after all, since you work for that kind of department.” 

What should he do, scratch that, what can he do? It’s a complete violation of policy to be fraternizing with his civilian life. Sure, there has been episodes of civilians and agents meeting each other, but only minor violations that both parties forgot about shortly after. He’s so far deep at this point, he can risk being relocated or losing his civilian—losing you. 

“Do you think he really works in the FBI?” you say when he doesn’t reply immediately, “he’s really cute, though. Totally looks like my style, and he likes My Hero as well! C’mon, I just need for you to check as to whether he’s a homicidal maniac or a compulsive liar.” 

Liar. He’s a liar. 

That self-accusation prompts him to slump in defeat, and he mumbles in the phone, “I don’t think he’s worth it. I’d say pass.” 

“Hey, Coups has seniority,” Soonyoung pats Jihoon thoughtfully on the back with one hand, and grilling meat with the other. Barbeque always lifted up Jihoon’s spirits. “Why don’t you give it a chance and meet her for real? And then he can give me your super cute civilian and then he can give my shitty civilian to some newbie.” 

“And if it doesn’t work out, I just lose her,” Jihoon’s eyes are watering, most likely from the excess smoke around their grill, but it does align with his current state of sadness. It was the right thing to do, he thinks over and over as he replays that phonecall from last night. “Hoshi, if you were in my situation, would you have done the same?” 

“Like I said–” Soonyoung—codename Hoshi, waves his tongs around like a magic wand, “your civilian is super cute, so I would be making a beeline to her house and—” 

“Okay, don’t finish that sentence,” you’re his civilian, not Soonyoung’s. 

“Cheer up, c’mon,” Soonyoung’s filling his bowl with all sorts of delicious things, charred vegetables, mixed rice, and pork belly. Jihoon’s favorite is pork belly, so eventually he relents with a timid smile, taking out his chopsticks to appease his friend, “there it is, Uji. Food always makes things better—” 

“Uji?” 

Both off-duty agents freeze, hearing the familiar ting of your voice as it glares holes into Jihoon’s back. It’s you. Since they’re off the clock, he would have no idea you’d be here. Usually that’s fine, it’s early morning and it’s pretty unlikely that you’d run into your civilian considering you’re supposed to know every second of their schedule. It seems that tonight you’ve varied from the norm. 

“Uh, hey?” 

His back is still facing you, and he’s side eying Soonyoung in a panic. He’s wearing a cap and a nondescript hoodie, feeling like a shlub as your familiar voice pings back at him with excitement. 

“I knew I recognized your voice!” you’re unfazed, definitely not realizing the distress the two men are currently going through. “What a small world, I didn’t think we’d ever actually run into each other!” 

“Talk to her, you ass!” Soonyoung hisses, and immediately swivels his chair so he has no choice but to face you.

You’re so, so pretty. Prettier in person, prettier than any crappy 480p screen can give him. You’re definitely not dressed for barbeque, in fact you look like you’re just passing by to pick up a to-go order after a night out. You’re dressed in a silky looking velvet off-the-shoulder top, the cherry red color practically melting onto your skin. The black skirt paired with it has Jihoon salivating for more than just barbeque, and he has no idea how to look away. 

The smile is wiped clean off your face however, and you recognize him almost immediately. “Jihoon?” 

This should be a moment of joy for him, after all it’s far too late to go back at this point. You look a little hurt, your face twisted in confusion as you put two and two together. 

Soonyoung excuses himself to go to the bathroom, although neither party seems to care. The lame, over-distended EDM music that plays over the cacophony of the barbeque place seems to melt in the atmosphere, much like how the smoke hits the fan, and it’s just you two in the room. Jihoon gestures a pale hand to Soonyoung’s seat, and you take a beat to reluctantly sit yourself down. 

You clutch your skirt with both hands, thumbs ringing against the pleats and ironing them out. “So, you’re also Jihoon?” your voice is tiny, small and sad. Jihoon feels liquid guilt inject in his veins, and he wishes he could reach out and pat your shoulder, hold your hand, something. However no matter how much he knows you, he’s a stranger to you. “Why did you lie to me?” 

“It’s… complicated,” you shake your head at his pathetic reply, and Jihoon hates this. He feels like he’s drowning in smoke and mirrors and the cloying scent of pork belly is now sticking to all his senses, immobilizing him. 

With a cross of your arms, you scoff, “It’s always complicated.” 

“Please don’t think I said those things the other night because I don’t want to date you,” Jihoon tumbles the words out like a hamster wheel, wanting to speed up to your pace as fast as he can, “I want to, I really do, but it’s—”

“Complicated.” 

“Yeah.” 

The two of you sit in silence, letting the noise back into your little bubble. Jihoon feels his stare on you, akin to how a teacher looks over your shoulder during an exam. He robotically eats rice, grain after grain as he lets you have your look. 

The slope of his nose, the cotton smooth skin, the lean yet strong stature. You can’t believe he matches the Light a Flame profile perfectly. Other than the frumpy clothes, he matches the man on your phone, a simple picture in a black suit that reminds you strangely of the movie Kingsman. You mentally roll through what you remember from his profile, his hobbies, his likes and dislikes, his occupation—

“Wait,” you pause, your brows knitting together, “so the FBI thing on your profile… is not a joke?” 

Jihoon forgets to chew his last bite, and he swallows a whole two centimeters of meat down his throat. Ouch. 

“It’s—” 

“Complicated.” 

The adjective has a whole new meaning now. It’s crazy how in so little words, so much is exchanged between you two. You might not be realizing it, but Jihoon’s so attuned to you he feels like the pick to your guitar, strumming and humming along your chords like it’s second nature. It really isn’t fair, but anticipating your reactions helps greatly. 

“There’s things you’re not telling me.” 

“Right.” 

“And things you can’t tell me,” you add. 

“Yes.” 

“Then what are some things you can tell me?” 

“I’d… rather not here,” Jihoon’s eyes dart around the room, looking for all the pinholes and micro cams attached to the restaurant. By the bonsai, under the table, in the koi tank, “I need to work out some paperwork before anything.” 

“Paperwork?” 

Jihoon nods mutely, but he looks at you with a litany of emotions in his eyes you’re reeling back in your stool. Why do you feel like this man knows you from a simple five-minute interaction? And why do you feel like you can trust this man with your life? 

“Okay,” you finally say. 

“Really? Okay?” you think he’s cute, the way his eyes perk up and his back straightens. 

“Really.” 

Silence fills the space once more. This time however, it feels more at ease. 

“The only reason why I’m saying yes,” you pretend to nonchalantly play with your fingertips, a manicure reserved for a date you’ve long abandoned for this evening in favor of a new flame, “is because I think FBI agents are kinda hot.” 

A flush blooms on Jihoon’s cheeks, and you can’t help but giggle. 

#jihoon x reader #woozi x reader #caratwritersclub #kwritersworldnet #svtcreations #jihoon fic #woozi fic #seventeen fic #seventeen fanfic #seventeen scenarios #jihoon scenarios #woozi scenarios

[doomedideas]

Mcytblr 2021 Elections

Hello again, Mcytblr! We’ve got another round of elections coming up, run by @mcytblr-elections-2021, and once again reported on by Main Journalist DoomedIdeas. To those of you who don’t know about the elections, consider this a good introduction! We’ll be going over what they are, what’s happening, and some information on the team running this whole event. Hope to see you running, and as always, don’t look back. The elections are coming up, and this time, the best we can do is keep moving forwards! First of all, keep in mind that these are not the same elections as before. This cycle is run by new people, with new candidates, and let’s treat them all with respect, please. If you’d like to join, it’s really easy- find yourself between 1 and 7 other runningmates, make a campaign, register with the mods of the elections, and go wild. Posts about the election run from propaganda, to slander, to bystander memes, and even some amazing fanart- keep on the lookout for that! 

Now that the introduction is complete, I’d like some of the moderators themselves to tell you about what’s going on. I was able to get an interview with @braveboyhalo (ginger) and @kiwilovescitrusfruit (kiwi), two admins of this year’s elections. Here’s what they had to say. (Quotes taken directly from source, with slight editing for clarity and comprehension.)

Did you have any involvement with the 2020 elections, and what do you think about them? Ginger: “I was involved in that, yeah. I did pretty okay and I enjoyed them a lot! I’m not much into roleplay but there were a lot of other reasons it was fun, I made a couple friends.” Kiwi: “I actually had zero influence at the time! I was just getting into the mcyt community after several years without, so it was around that time I started originally getting into the fandom. I saw a few posts about it on and off, but I never participated or really followed through on it!”

Do you think the past elections will influence this one, and if so, how? Kiwi: “They definitely have a huge influence, a lot of people have been nostalgic for the ways things used to be. I’ve heard several comments already that this season of the election reminds them a lot of the original! Besides, our inspiration to start this was the original elections and our desire to improve upon the second ones.”

What do you think of some of the currently running parties? Ginger: “We have a lot of them. Most of them have pretty, uh, funny names, which sets the tone for the election. A couple of the parties already have posters and such, so they’re pretty passionate, which is surprising.” Kiwi: “Well, they’re… a lot! [UNNAMED PARTY] kind of scares me. A lot of the parties kind of scare me! There are a lot of funny, cool, popular and talented people in the running, and I encourage everyone to go through our blog and check out each and every person who’s up to doing this. It takes a lot of courage to run for president.”

What do you expect to see in the upcoming weeks? Ginger: “The mod team and I are midway through setting up the official discord and making it able to hold enough people. We have a couple parties forming already, so we’re trying to keep it going while making sure everyone gets what they need.” Kiwi: “I expect to see [TRANSCRIPT PARTIALLY LOST]. The planning discord is full of sparkly banners [LOST], big runners have [LOST], and the tags are fuller than ever! This is going down hard in the community, and I couldn’t be more excited! I’m also hoping for cool art. I’m always hoping for cool art.”

What is the modding situation like? Ginger: “We’re planning to add a lot more regulation and modding so it stays friendly. Our bot coder is setting up a ticket/report system, and we’re going to have a lot of pretty active people modding to keep chats safe. We don’t want a lot of drama or hurt feelings, so I myself and some people I trust to be impartial and fair will be actively modding for most of it.”

Is there anything else you’d like to say to the readers? Ginger: “I’d just like to thank everyone for giving us a chance, and i’m glad we can get a lot of new or shy people into the active mcytblr community.” Kiwi: “I’d like to say that I’m very proud of everyone who’s come together to run for the elections, I’m very excited for what’s going forward. Also, hermitblr, please feel free to join. You guys know elections and corruption, and are really cool. I just think it would be fun!”

Overall, this election is absolutely full of new faces, and trying to draw more in. It’s well set up, the candidates are raring to go, and everything will turn out just fine. Feel free to run, vote, and get involved in any way you wish- The Mcytblr 2021 Elections welcome everybody, and we’d be glad to see you here!

(Please remember that the Journalist is unbiased, and these statements are relatively unedited. If you have any questions or concerns, our inbox is always open, and we are happy to accept anything from slight corrections to letters to the Editor.)

#mcytblr elections #mcyt #My writing #let's get this show on the road! #-Journalist

[1ddotdhq]

🙇🏼‍♀️Fri 6 Nov ‘20 🛹

Yesterday was the most absurd night I’ve seen on tumblr in the last five years. Just wanted to throw that out there. Between gay Supernatural news, Nevada going to bed again, and Putin possibly stepping down, we also got discourse™️ about Zayn and Gigi. Two women on twitter stepped forward and have claimed to have been sleeping with Zayn when he was with Gigi. The first woman says that when they were together in 2016 Zayn told her that Gigi was PR, and not an actual relationship, and that she called it off when she found Gigi's medication at Zayn's place. The second woman said that she saw Z from 2016 until February 2020 (and that yes, Gigi was pregnant at that time). She says she got him the custom Dusk ‘til Dawn skateboard that he later gave away in a fan event, and posted at the time about angrily entering the contest to try to get her unappreciated gift back. In another angry tweet (these women were spilling for a reason, they're mad as hell), she said the biggest lesson she’s learned this year is, “never let a boy with a girlfriend convince you into dyeing your hair because you’ll end up with damaged hair and he’ll still have a girlfriend”. Here’s hoping that she goes into 2021 without damaged hair and with someone that wouldn’t give away the gifts she gave them - everyone deserves that! The pair are mostly fighting with each other so more details for us popcorn munching bystanders are thin on the ground; for example neither gives a clue as to whether Gigi supposedly knew about them. Fan reaction is split between not believing the women, insulting the women, insulting Zayn, and insulting each other. I want to say it’s not my place to judge any of them, but I think that at this point I’m just screaming into a void, so I’ll say this: if you’re going to be cruel (especially if you're sexist/racist) about any of them in my notes, you’re going to be blocked.

Niall went live today with a special announcement: Ashe will be joining him LIVE on tomorrow’s show! That’s right: they flew her out to London two and a half weeks ago, had her quarantine, and will now have her perform exactly ONE SONG with Niall: Moral of the Story. Don’t get me wrong, I’m SUPER excited to see her, but uh...I have questions. Has she only flown in and quarantined for one song? Or will Niall do what Liam has been and use her as an opener, allowing her to play her set? I guess we’ll see tomorrow! The Independent reported that 90,000 tickets have already been sold for the concert, which is $1.8 million dollars towards paying Niall’s crew and the WeNeedCrew fund, which is amazing and will go a long way! We also got some instagram stories of him rehearsing, and he sounds great! I am getting more and more excited for this show as time goes on. Some set mock-up pictures of DWD were released, as well as some on site pictures of Jack and Alice’s house: it’s the Kaufmann house, which was made famous by Slim Aaron for his “poolside gossip” picture. It was put back on the market last month for $25 million, though I’m sure the price will only go up after this film premieres. 

Liam, who spoke in the interview that just came out yesterday about the futility of responding to the press and how it just stirs up more press about the same thing, responded to an article about him. The Sun drew on that same interview to report that Cheryl had told him to temporarily “take a break” from his son and insinuated that it was because of partying and addiction struggles, in a call back to their recent article about Liam's drinking (like literally calling back; they linked themselves as their source). Liam took to Instagram to say that the Sun had completely taken his remarks out of context, the context being that he said them in May, and that the thing that had separated him from his son was, “the worldwide pandemic, not because I had anything wrong with me”. He says he was “discussing not being able to see my child which is difficult for any parent. I wish sometimes these people would do the research and give the context instead of painting people a certain way for click bait”. I have no opinion (no thots empty head) other than that Liam was 100% right about one thing: there are now six more articles on this topic which would not have been written had he not said anything. 

And last night's memeing dredged up a lot of trips down tumblr memory lane, a regular retrospective of the last five years, and brought the uncomfortable emergence of a lot of locals posting about babygate ("haha next we'll find out that guy from 1D really wasn't the dad!" ha...ha...uhhh.) A good reminder of how many people are uninvested but still very much aware of the babygate rumors and of how major any kind of announcement or revelation would be, the absolute impossibility of just "ending it while no one is looking!" And in totally unrelated (and unwanted) news, Briana and Nick unshuttered their instagrams. "I'm back!" posts Briana. Ugh, read the room people: you are an unasked for cactus. That being said, please let's all take a deep breath and drink some water and get some sleep. It’s what I’ll be doing all weekend!

#z #niall #harry #liam #louis #the clown car #i just #what a night huh? #and do we know who the president is yet? #NO WE DO NOT #or well...not officially at any rate #guys im slowly losing it i need a very nice very LONG nap #okay well #that’s me for today! #song of the day! #American Pie by Don McClean #us election #tw supernatural

[cryingcow]

Katsuya & Watase - Osaka Talent Disaster [RGGO]

Last January’s 2-part scratch card mini-event featured Katsuya and Watase. Originally I saved the event because I loved Watase and his meme-y pose here (plus a lot of people in the FB group rave about him), but after the experience that is seeing Katsuya’s unnecessarily bare ass on the tv screen last week, I have to say that Katsuya has won me over XD

Warning for slight Y5 spoilers (mostly Akiyama’s chapter)!

.

PROLOGUE

.

|Before news of the 7th Omi Alliance Chairman’s grave illness reached the ears of every yakuza organization all over Japan . . . when the Tojo Clan and Omi Alliance exchanged equal cups and peace in the eastern part of the yakuza society in Japan was still maintained----|

Osaka Talent Employee: “Chairman, the information you want to urgently hear . . .”

Katsuya: “I told you to call me ‘President’ while working here, didn’t I?”

Osaka Talent Employee: “I apologize, President . . .”

Katsuya: “Good . . . what is this urgent information?”

Osaka Talent Employee: “Yes, well actually, last night someone stole a large number of scratch card tickets prepared for the event the day after tomorrow.”

Katsuya: “Scratch card tickets? The ones we were planning to distribute on the event the day after tomorrow?”

Osaka Talent Employee: “Yes, it is said that all 1000 scratch card tickets we prepared has been stolen.”

Katsuya: “Where and when on earth did they steal such things . . . ?”

Osaka Talent Employee: “It is currently under investigation. What should we do, President?”

Katsuya: “There is no choice but to take measures against such an occurrence . . . Rescheduling the event to minimize damage . . . The inclusion of scratch cards on KALEN’s 1st anniversary album has already been advertised on commercials . . . Be prepared to notify the record company and other related parties that the scratch cards are no longer sealed. Tell the Promotion Department about preparing a contact point for this matter. It is also necessary to prepare an apology announcement to be posted on the official website . . . For the customers who have made multiple reservations for scratch cards, get ready to process refunds right away . . . If necessary, we’ll film an apology comment from me. Contact the studio and the staff . . . If despite all the investigations today the scratch cards don’t show up, be prepared to do everything I said tomorrow.”

Osaka Talent Employee: “Then, will we still distribute scratch cards the day after tomorrow?”

Katsuya: “At this point, preparing new scratch cards is out of the question. There is no choice but to prepare to face cancellation . . .”

Osaka Talent Employee: “Understood. The various preparation will be made . . .”

Katsuya: “Oh, and contact Kanai . . . I want him to search for the criminal thoroughly and settle things to make sure this never happens again . . . Leave a mark on the criminal to show where we draw the line on these kinds of incidents . . .”

Osaka Talent Employee: “Y-Yes! Understood!!”

----

Watase: “What did you say?! They’ve really made a move?!”

Watase Family Executive: “Ye-Yeah . . . the members who saw them also confirmed the crest. It’s definitely the ones from Sakai Family who are wandering around Sotenbori.”

Watase: “Sakai Family, the veteran yakuza organization in Kobe that has been refusing to fall under our umbrella for a long time . . . What the hell are they doing in Sotenbori?”

Watase Family Executive: “According to the footsoldiers I ordered to follow the footsteps of the Sakai Family, it seems they are screaming about Osaka Talent . . .”

Watase: “Osaka Talent? Why are they bothering Ka-chan’s front business . . . ?”

Watase Family Executive: “I don’t know . . . but there seems to be no doubt about it.”

Watase: “What is Sakai Family, who has been silent for a decade, planning . . . I have no idea at all, but I’ll have to inform Ka-chan about this. I’m going to go talk with Ka-chan over this. Keep tracking their movements. Yeah?”

Watase Family Executive: “Yes! Understood!!”

----

Osaka Talent Employee: “President, Watase-sama said he has an important matter to discuss with you. Should I let him through?”

Katsuya: “Watase-no-aniki? Alright, let him in.”

Watase: “Oh, Ka-chan. Sorry to barge in all of a sudden . . . is now a good time?”

Katsuya: “Yeah, of course I don’t mind . . . Did something happen for Aniki to come here directly?”

Watase: “No, it’s just that a very rare guest has arrived in Sotenbori. But I can’t read the guest’s thoughts . . . So I’m thinking of listening to Ka-chan’s opinion . . .”

Katsuya: “A rare guest?”

Watase: “It seems that the people of Sakai Family have been spotted in Sotenbori . . .”

Katsuya: “Sakai Family? The hostile Kobe-based veteran organization?”

Watase: “Right. Sakai Family has been quiet for a long time. They’re searching for Ka-chan’s Osaka Talent for some reason.”

Katsuya: “. . . Is that true?”

Watase: “Yeah, no doubt. My underlings confirmed that they are yelling around about Osaka Talent.”

Katsuya: “Sakai Family is after us . . . Then is it Sakai Family who stole that . . . ?”

Watase: “What, Ka-chan. Did they steal anything?”

Katsuya: “Actually, a lot of scratch card tickets we were planning to use at an event got stolen last night . . . We were just looking for the criminal . . . but now I wonder if they were looking for us.”

Watase: “Well, sure, Sakai Family is suspicious in terms of timing. But why scratch cards?”

Katsuya: “I can’t think of any reason why Sakai Family would steal it. Those scratch cards are my idol’s, for exchanging with prizes at the event . . . It’s not something that a veteran yakuza organization would need . . .”

Osaka Talent Employee: “Excuse me for coming in!! An urgent report for the President . . .”

Katsuya: “I’m in the middle of talking with an important guest----"

Watase: “It’s fine, Ka-chan. He said it was an important report.”

Katsuya: “Apologies, Watase-no-aniki . . . I’m sorry for the trouble.”

Katsuya: “What is the urgent report?”

Osaka Talent Employee: “I received a report that included information on the thief . . . Just before the scratch cards were stolen, there were sightings of Kobe’s yakuza organization Sakai Family near the scene . . .”

Katsuya: “. . . Sakai Family? There’s no mistake?”

Osaka Talent Employee: “Yes . . . Mikawa, the young head of the Sakai Family, was the one witnessed. I’m sure he’s a very well-known person . . .”

Watase: “Haw . . . in that case, there’s no doubt the scratch card thief is Mikawa of the Sakai Family or his subordinates?”

Katsuya: “There isn’t enough evidence to conclude that . . . but we can’t say they have nothing to do with it. We’ll need to hear more from that person named Mikawa . . .”

Katsuya: “Contact Kanai. Tell him to look for the Sakai Family that has slipped into Sotenbori.”

Osaka Talent Employee: “Y-Yes! Understood.”

Katsuya: “If the offender is an officer, I will move too. Call your aides and tell them to bring in the car.”

Osaka Talent Employee: “U-Understood! Right away!!”

{The employee runs out.}

Katsuya: “This is quite the incident, Aniki. I’ll deal with this immediately----”

Watase: “Ka-chan, I’ll collaborate this time too!”

Katsuya: “Watase-no-aniki? But . . . there is no reason for Aniki to deal with problems with my front business----"

Watase: “We don’t know what their aim is. This incident might be trouble . . . Yeah, Ka-chan! It ain’t hard!! For the time being, why don’t we look for Mikawa of Sakai Family and catch him?!”

Katsuya: “Understood. Thank you for your cooperation, Watase-no-aniki.”

.

-END-

.

EPILOGUE

.

Mikawa: “Why is the Osaka Enterprises President and Watase Family Chairman showing up together and chasing me?! This is ridiculous?!”

Watase: “You think the Sakai Family can just have their way in Sotenbori without the Omi Alliance noticing? Making off with another family’s possession on our own turf, that’s the height of stupidity . . .”

Katsuya: “Besides, the scratch cards you stole are my property. I can’t let you go after you did that.”

Mikawa: “O-Osaka Talent is Osaka Enterprises’ front company?!”

Watase: “You knew that, and you stole from Osaka Talent?”

Mikawa: “I didn’t know!! If I knew, I wouldn’t do something like this!! Who-Who would think that the yakuza would advance into the entertainment industry?!”

Katsuya: “. . . So what was your purpose in stealing the scratch cards?”

Mikawa: “Th-That’s . . .”

Watase: “You don’t have a problem with confessing . . . right?”

{Watase grabs Mikawa’s arm and twists it behind his back.}

Mikawa: “I-I understand!! I’ll talk, so please forgive me!!”

{Watase lets go and steps back.}

Watase: “Yeah keep that in mind. Now from the beginning.”

Mikawa: “My boss got hooked on this idol KALEN . . . He really wanted an autographed body pillow, which is the special limited-edition prize for the 1st anniversary event . . .”

Watase: “No way, you stole all the scratch cards because you wanted to win the lottery?!”

Mikawa: “Yes! It can’t be helped!! There’s only one of the limited-edition prize. The only way to get the winning ticket is to steal all the scratch card tickets and search for it!!”

Watase: “Hahaha! Ka-chan and this idol are very popular!”

Katsuya: “Watase-no-aniki, don’t hit me on my back . . .”

Katsuya: “However, to steal the scratch cards for that . . . Didn’t it occur to you that the idol would be in trouble?”

Mikawa: “As underlings, our job is to get what our boss wants and give it to him. I don’t know what happens to the idols.”

Katsuya: “If Boss Sakai is really a fan of our KALEN, I’m sure he would be sad to hear what you did.”

Mikawa: “What did you say?! I did this for Boss----”

Katsuya: “If all the scratch cards do not return in their original form, we have no choice but to cancel the 1st anniversary event. If that happens, wouldn’t Boss Sakai be upset?”

Mikawa: “Th-That is . . .”

Katsuya: “This incident that you caused for the sake of your boss invites such consequences . . . Thank you for supporting KALEN. However, due compensation for this shall properly follow.  . . . Please inform Boss Sakai.”

Mikawa: “You-You’ll let me go?!”

Katsuya: “Yeah, but you must convey these words to Boss Sakai.”

Mikawa: “Th-Thank you . . . I’ll definitely tell my boss. Well then, please excuse me . . .”

{Mikawa runs off.}

Watase: “Was it okay to let him escape, Ka-chan?”

Katsuya: “I just got in touch with my subordinates . . . It seems all the stolen scratch cards can be recovered. I was considering cancelling the event the day after tomorrow, but it seems it can be held safely. There’s no problem . . . I didn’t miss anything. You heard what I said to him, didn’t you? ‘Due compensation for this shall properly follow’ . . .”

Watase: “. . . Ka-chan’s nasty expression, I feel like this is the first time I’ve seen that in a while. For underestimating the Omi Alliance, I figured the Watase Family can properly rake the Sakai Family over the coals. Seeing Ka-chan’s face, I changed my mind. Can I leave the disposal of Sakai Family to Ka-chan?”

Katsuya: “Yes, I intended to do that from the beginning.”

Watase: “Isn’t this unusual for Ka-chan, who hates fighting, to do?”

Katsuya: “Watase-no-aniki, I am also a yakuza. Lately, I’ve been devoted to doing honest work, but I can’t just allow myself to be underestimated and keep silent, can I?”

Watase: “Then I’ll leave this to Osaka Enterprises! Go wild with all your might, Ka-chan!!”

Katsuya: “Please leave it to me. I’ll clean it up in one night . . .”

----

|That night, Katsuya attacked the Sakai Family office with the full force of Osaka Enterprises. After the attack by Osaka Enterprises, Sakai Family was demolished overnight.|

.

-END-

 Masterlist

#aka 'shit the Omi does when the Tojo isnt making a mess' #they have fun bonding sessions apparently with a side of murder and corpse disposal #rgg online #rggo lore #rggo #rgg #ryu ga gotoku #yakuza #masaru watase #watase masaru #katsuya naoki #naoki katsuya

[azulapropaganda]

Hello everyone. Today (August 2nd 2020) I noticed a blog who earlier tried to accuse me of being a terf has once again made another post about this. This time she accused me of some other things and since her post suddenly started gaining attention, I decided to clear some things up and reply to every single claim she makes in her post.

I’m genuinely tired of all of this.... So, there’s a insanely popular atla TERF (@what-would-azula-do) blogger that’s been attacking me and my friends, and she worked with a group of TERFs to ban my og spop blog. I literally just made this blog but I’m tired of getting attacked by TERFs, so I’m making a call out post (ew ikr) to end this.

I am not a terf. I did not work with a group of terfs to ban your blog, you did this to yourself by tagging your post with “terfs please interact”, “terfs do touch” and other tags. You’re attacking a minor with false claims that are easily debunked. I have not been attacking you or your friends, I don’t even know who your friends are. I specifically added the “please do not send op any hate” tag when I called you out so my followers wouldn’t harass you.

First off, what-would-azula-do is a pretty obvious crypto TERF. She reblogs and creates a ton of TERFy posts that might flow off the radar of cis people, but directly harms trans people. She constantly reblogs and makes exclusionary feminist posts that exclude trans women, and use TERF rhetoric, and she doesn’t have any trans or non-binary mutuals. She also just posts full on TERF shit a lot, and whenever she gets called out she gets defensive and deletes the evidence. I got this info from an anonymous trans woman that pmed me, but she also used to just be a full on out TERF in 2016, and posted transphobic slurs and memes regularly, and also was a SWERF. Allegedly she deleted the blog and remade with her new main and the what-would-azula-do sideblog. Again this is just an alleged anon tip but I believe it. She also ships a pretty TERFy atla ship (tyzula) that à ton of TERFs on tumblr ship. Now I’m going to go to a huge pile of shit already, ONE OF HER MUTUALS IS LITERALLY AN OPEN TERF.

You say I reblog and create a ton of terfy posts. Which ones? I only talk about atla on this blog and actually make an effort to tag anything else as “off topic”. I don’t think I even made a post about feminism on my blog. You also say I don’t have any trans or nonbinary mutuals, do you have any proof of that? You contradict this claim further in your post (“Has trans mutuals even though she’s a TERF”). You say I post “terf shit” a lot, could you provide screenshots of that please? And according to you, “whenever” I get called out I delete the evidence. I got one anon once when I accidentally reblogged something from a terf I wasn’t aware I was following. I personally wouldn’t call my reply to this anon “defensive”. You say you got info from an anonymous trans woman that I used to be a full on terf in 2016 and that I posted transphobic slurs and memes regularly. In 2016 I was 13-14 years old and I didn’t even have a tumblr blog. I don’t even know how to address the tyzula thing. How is a ship “terfy”? And just because I reblog art, doesn’t mean I actually ship it? I reblog art of several ships just because I like the art.

Unholy-lesbian is one of what-would-azula-do’s TERF mutuals (she has about three crypto TERF mutuals too) that’s just a full on TERF. She was really into the TERF sphere a month ago but went crypto when she became mutuals with what-would-azula-do (probs to protect her crypto TERF identity) she said she’s not a TERF anymore, but she still reblogs TERF rhetoric and all her mutuals are TERFs. She also put TERF in quotation marks which means she probs thinks it’s a slur, which is TERF rhetoric. She’s also a gold star lesbian which means she excludes trans women from her dating pool. I’d go into this bitch more, but this callout ain’t for her.

Could you please give me the usernames of my three cryptoterf mutuals? Look I’m not going to deny that unholy-lesbian was a terf a while ago. She told me this yesterday or two days ago when I talked to her about your post. She also told me she was done being a terf because the community was so hateful all the time. She’s 15 years old, don’t pull her into this.

I’m friends with her so she can find a welcoming and nice community in the atla fandom. She’s on the right path now, do you seriously want to go hate on her for this?

This is a lighting round of all the shit she did, and also her track of aphobia and ableism, so here we go:

I literally have autism and adhd myself.

Used the t slur on her old blog (alleged)

No I haven’t? Could you provide proof of this please?

Has trans mutuals even though she’s a TERF

You contradict this earlier in this post, once again without any evidence.

Misgendered an artist on what-would-azula-do and didn’t apologize

Who? I use “they” whenever I don’t know the gender of an artist. I wasn’t aware this ever happened and I’d like to apologize to said artist of this claim is true

Liked an aphobic meme

Which meme? Also my likes aren’t even visible.

Mutuals with an aphobe that bullied an ace kid off tumblr

Who?

Uses her queer followers as props to denounce her being a TERF

This is ridiculous. My followers know I’m not a terf so of course some of them are going to defend me and support me.

Gaslight her former nb mutual

Who?

Reblogged from a TERF with TERF in her username

Yes and I addressed this already. Someone sent an anon about this, I deleted the post, unfollowed the user I wasn’t even aware of following in the first place, and thanked the anon for telling me about this.

Said the r slur on her main

No I didn’t? Do you have a screenshot of or a link to this post? Also I literally have autism, as I have mentioned earlier on this blog.

Slandered a queer artist on what-would-azula-do

Who?

WORKED WITH TERFS TO DEPLATFORM ME (A NB LESBIAN OF COLOR)

I reported your post once because you were accusing me of untrue things and harassing me, a minor, and you were threatening to murder my followers. I didn’t work with terfs at all, they came to your post after you tagged it with “terfs please interact”

And what does your sexuality and gender even have to do with this?

Even if she wasn’t a TERF (which she is lol) she worked with TERFs to ban my blog that exposed her, which is violently lesbophpbic and nbphobic.

Your blog was banned because you were harassing a minor and throwing around false accusations, not because you are a lesbian or nonbinary. I did not work with terfs to ban your blog, as I have mentioned twice earlier.

So y’all really shouldn’t follow or support her anymore, unless you’re a TERF just like her. (Dm me for screenshots, I didn’t want to post them here since she’d just gaslight me)

Please post all of the screenshots you have in a reply to this post.

Also, could you stop harassing my followers. This is just incredibly gross behavior.

PREVIOUS POST

#tw discourse #off topic #tw terf mentions #terfs dni #please do not send the op of that post any hate #said blog was shadowbanned earlier because she was harassing me two days ago #she made a new blog today and continued harassing me and my followers #she has been pm’ing people to try and get them to reblog her post

[ahtsumu]

hi aelia!!! (dear god that is a BEAUTIFUL name i hope you love it!!) so for the milestone drabble thingy?? could you maybe do officerival!oikawa?? like in a really healthy and fun way and they gradually become better friends and then more?? 👀👀 this is just to describe their dynamics but please feel free to write a short drabble for whatever part of this situation you like!!! i apologize if the request is unclear 😭😭 good luck with ur writing!!

entente

oikawa tooru x gn!reader • office!au • fluff, enemies to friends (hinted romance)

it’s wednesday and you’re one unnecessarily occupied printer away from committing homicide. as you turn the corner to the your last hope (see: the frequently jammed, often out-of-ink, old-as-fossils hp laser jet that was last replaced in 1998, jesus christ), you realise that someone has already beat you to it.

that someone is the same person who also beat you to all the other printers in this building.

oikawa tooru.

the bane of your existence.

the curly haired brunet smirks and leans against the massive printer. “oh, hey! didn’t expect to see you here,” he drawls. he waves ‘hello’, brandishing the company id in his hand like a threat.

“don’t you dare,” you utter, carefully closing the distance between you. “i have so many reports to print for the meeting with microsoft.”

“yeah, and i have to print the papers for the lanyards of the guests attending!” oikawa retorts, crossing his arms over his chest.

“not the same.”

“kinda is.”

ever since the two of you started as interns for the most prestigious law firm in the city, oikawa has picked on you like a child picks a scab: relentlessly. there’s the time he stole your stapler and froze it in jello, the time he covered your entire desk in post-it notes, the time he replaced the phone in your cubicle with a banana… and then there are all the times he’s bombed your phone with texts and memes in meetings and gotten the two of you in trouble.

but it’s not all one-sided. you’ve also stolen his blazer and had it hung like a flag from a window in the break-room, took out all the ink chambers in the pens in his cubicle, and you still set fake meeting dates in his calendar to give him a well-deserved scare. there’s one set for tomorrow, actually.

put frankly, you’re children. you bring out each other’s worst.

a few of the other interns say you just need to kiss, or do something. “get rid of–– ” kevin had gestured between yours and oikawa’s bodies “––this funky energy.”

“okay,” oikawa had said, closing his eyes and puckering his lips. you, on the other hand, had simply rolled your eyes and walked away. there was no way you were going to kiss someone that annoying. you’re certain oikawa’s only redeeming quality is his face. sure, he’s nice to look at, but the dreamy façade shatters the second he opens that insufferable mouth.

“move,” you grit out, now staring directly up at oikawa’s face.

“make me.”

“make me make you.”

his brows furrow. “what? that doesn’t even––” and in his moment of confusion, you shove him back and slap your id card down on the printer reader. except, you didn’t just shove oikawa. you pretty much body-checked him and now he’s grabbing onto your waist to steady himself and now you’re both falling because he’s almost two hundred points of pure muscle and suddenly you land on something firm. not hard like linoleum, but firm like muscle stretched over bone.

and you open your eyes. you find yourself staring into his.

“hey,” oikawa breathes, arms secure around your body. “are you okay?” brown irises carefully study your face.

“yeah,” you whisper back, still slightly in shock. “thanks for catching me.” but also there’s a certain fragility to this moment and you feel like a child cradling an egg in their palm.

“no, i grabbed you. i’m sorry.” his voice is soft and he’s unusually sincere. you’ve never seen him like this before.

“no, i–– i pushed you first,” you concede. “i’m sorry.”

did you both just apologise?

“then we’re even,” oikawa suggests, smiling. it’s not smug like his usual smirks. he looks genuinely happy. or at least, kind.

you consider his words. “well, not really. you stole the other printers from me.”

oikawa laughs and tilts his head back against the floor. you catch yourself staring at the skin of his neck. and all of a sudden you register the fact that your body is lying on top of his and your hands are pressed on his chest and you can smell his cologne and–– it’s too much. you get up and extend a hand to oikawa who takes it and pulls himself up.

“well, since we’re on the subject of apologising, i guess i’m sorry for that, too,” oikawa says while dusting off his clothes. “how can i make it up to you?”

“how about,” you say, “we wipe the slate clean.”

he smiles again and… you kinda like it. “sure,” oikawa agrees, stretching out his hand. “i’m oikawa tooru. it’s nice to meet you.”

you take it and shake, smiling as you say, “i’m y/n. i hope we get to know each other better.”

what’s on the menu for ahtsumu’s feast?

#oikawa tooru #oikawa tooru x reader #oikawa tooru imagines #oikawa tooru scenarios