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samwisethewitch · 1 year

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Pagan Wedding Planning (Part 1)

If you're like the vast majority of pagans, you probably have friends, family, or other people you care about who are not pagan. It's highly likely that you will have guests at your wedding who do not share your beliefs.

We can only hope that our non-pagan loved ones are open-minded, understanding, and supportive of our choice of spiritual path -- but realistically, this isn't always the case. You might have friends or family who don't really understand what paganism is or why you would want a pagan wedding. You may have loved ones who have been misinformed about what it means to be pagan by movies, TV, and popular culture. You might even have loved ones who are actively opposed to your religion, or who you don't feel safe "coming out" to.

If it's not important to you that your non-pagan friends and family attend your wedding, great! Only inviting other pagans decreases the chances that you'll have to explain ritual elememts or comfort an uncomfortable guest. If that's the route you want to go, by all means, have a pagans-only wedding. If it is important to you that your non-pagan loved ones are there for this milestone, then you really have three options: 1.) have a pagan wedding knowing you may have to accomodate non-pagan guests, 2.) have a secular wedding, possibly with a private religious ritual before or after, or 3.) have multiple weddings or split the wedding into multiple events, like a pagan ceremony with a secular reception. (Technically you also have a fourth option, which is to plan the type of wedding your loved ones are expecting. However, I do not recommend this option. Your wedding is about you and your partner(s), not your families, friends, and acquaintances. I've never met someone who compromised on their wedding and didn't regret it.) Let's explore what each of these options might look like. If you decide to go ahead with a fully pagan ceremony, the most important thing is to make sure you communicate up front that this will be a pagan religious ritual. You can include a line on invitations like "Please join us in celebrating our commitment with a Wiccan handfasting ceremony," or "[Partner] and [partner] will be exchanging vows in a Hellenic pagan ceremony." This makes it very clear to recipients what type of ceremony they've been invited to, and it gives them a chance to contact you with questions or concerns. If someone does contact you to ask about the ceremony, answer their questions honestly. They may be genuinely curious and simply want to know more about your beliefs. You might find it helpful to choose a good book about your religion ahead of time so you can recommend it to curious guests. This gives them a chance to feel more prepared for the ceremony, and it also spares you from having to teach a Paganism 101 class while you're trying to plan a wedding. If one of your guests expresses concern or discomfort about attending a pagan wedding (or worse, tries to talk you out of having one), you might have to set a firm boundary with them. Let them know that you value your relationship with them and that it would mean a lot to you for them to be present for your wedding, but that you also value your spiritual practice and feel it's important to have a ceremony that accurately reflects who you are. Tell them that you hope they are willing to set aside any ideological differences to support you during this important milestone, but you would never want them to do something that makes them feel unsafe or violates their deeply held beliefs just because you asked them to. Tell them that if they truly feel that they cannot be part of a pagan wedding, they shouldn't attend. Keep in mind that some religions teach that it is wrong or a sin to participate in rituals from other religions. If you have a friend or family member who practices one of these religions, you may want to leave them out of your pagan wedding plans. If you want them to know you're thinking of them, send them an invitation but be prepared for them to turn you down.

If you're choosing to have a pagan wedding, you're probably very open about your beliefs and have loved ones who are supportive. But be aware that there is always a chance your invitations will set off a missionary resonse from one of your guests, especially if you invite people who didn't previously know you were pagan. If you get a call or text from someone who is "concerned about your spiritual wellbeing" or "has some concerns about your lifestyle," refer back to the previous advice about guests who are uncomfortable attending a pagan ceremony. Tell them that you're happy with your current religious practice and aren't looking to convert. Be polite but firm. Make it clear that you respect their spiritual beliefs and expect them to do the same for you. If they keep bringing up the issue, you may need to privately let them know that they are no longer invited to the wedding. Uninviting someone from an event is always awkward, but it's much less awkward than letting that person make a scene during a serious religious ritual. Be willing to have difficult conversations ahead of time to avoid having them on your wedding day.

But sometimes it's not as simple as not inviting someone. Maybe it's very important to you that your grandmother be present at your wedding, but your grandmother wouldn't be comfortable attending a pagan ceremony. In these situations, you might choose to have a secular ceremony instead.

A secular ceremony is exactly what it sounds like -- a legally binding wedding ceremony with no religious elements. A lot of people associate secular weddings with "courthouse weddings," which is when you and your partner get married at a courthouse or other government building with few or no guests. While this is a popular option, especially for couples who don't want an expensive wedding, secular weddings can be as big and extravagant as you want to make them. The main difference is that the wedding will be officiated by a justice of the peace or an ordained nondenominational minister instead of by a member of the clergy. And, of course, there won't be any overt religious elements.

A secular wedding can be a great option if you're marrying someone who isn't pagan, or if your family and friends aren't very religious. It also allows for a lot of freedom and personalization since you don't have to follow any specific traditions. You can even ask a friend or relative to get ordained (which, at least in the US, can be done online for free) so they can officiate the wedding. The sky is the limit when it comes to planning a secular ceremony.

If you decide on a secular wedding but still want to ritually acknowledge your union or ask the gods to bless your marriage, you can do so in a private, personal ritual either before or after the wedding itself. If your partner is also pagan or is open to participating in pagan rituals, ask them to join you. If not, enjoy this personal time alone with your gods and ancestors.

The third option is to have two or more wedding events. This is the most complicated (and usually most expensive) option, but it's also the best way to make sure everyone gets what they want -- you and your partner(s) get a religious ceremony that is meaningful to you, and your families and friends can still attend a wedding that feels familiar and traditional.

This is also sometimes the best option for interfaith couples. Some religions only recognize marriages that were performed according to their traditions, and many of these faiths don't allow for interfaith ceremonies -- if your partner belongs to one of these religions, you may need to have two ceremonies. Or maybe one or both of you has a very traditional family who want you to have a ceremony that reflects their cultural heritage. For example, a Roman Catholic who is marrying a Heathen with Indian heritage might have up to three different ceremonies: a Catholic religious ceremony, a Heathen religious ceremony, and an Indian cultural ceremony. (This would only happen if the Heathen partner wanted a religious ceremony, since Heathenry recognizes non-Heathen marriages.)

This is also a great option if you're torn between having a pagan ceremony and having a secular one. You can have a small pagan ceremony with just you, your partner(s), your officiant, and a few pagan or pagan-friendly loved ones, then have a secular ceremony or a big reception for your less open-minded guests. You don't have to make compromises, everyone gets to be a part of your wedding in some way, and you can all gracefully avoid any tense conversations about belief or lifestyle.

The downside to the "multiple weddings" approach is that it makes the whole process a lot more stressful for the people planning all these events, which is usually the people getting married. Each event costs money and requires time and energy to plan, plus you'll be juggling multiple guest lists. Depending on how anti-pagan your loved ones are, you may even have to keep the pagan ceremony a secret, which is another source of stress. The last thing you want is to get angry phone calls from relatives who just found out they were only invited to part of your wedding! Ultimately, you and your partner need to decide if making everyone happy is worth that extra stress.

Full disclosure: my fiance and I decided to go the "multiple weddings" route. We had a couple of family members who we wanted to include, but who we knew wouldn't be willing to attend a pagan ritual. At the same time, both of us are very religious in our weird, pagan way, and we knew we wanted to have a religious marriage ceremony. A secular wedding just wouldn't be authentic for us.

We decided to compromise by having a small, intimate, and very pagan ceremony, then having a larger, 100% secular reception later on the same day. Because our ceremony was going to be so small, we would be able to afford both events while still staying under budget. (My mom actually surprised me by offering to help pay for our reception, which was incredibly sweet, but we would have been able to pay for everything ourselves even without her much-appreciated help.) It probably helps that even at our "big" event, we're going to have fewer than fifty people.

If you and your partner(s) decide to have multiple weddings, be prepared to spend a lot of time and stress on the budget. Budgeting for multiple events means you may have to make sacrifices to save money -- for example, you may have to book a smaller venue for the reception so you can afford to reserve a space for the pagan ceremony. While it's possible to get married practically for free if you get a friend to officiate, have the ceremony and reception at a loved one's home, wear clothes you already own, etc., that may not be the type of wedding you and your partner(s) were imagining for yourselves. Sit down with your partner(s) early in the planning process and have a very honest, realistic talk about what you want vs. what you can actually afford.

No matter what type of ceremony (or how many) you decide to have, your family may offer to help you pay for it. In Western cultures, the bride's family traditionally pays for the wedding ceremony and the reception and the groom's family traditionally pays for the rehearsal dinner, the marriage license fee, and the honeymoon. While a lot of families no longer follow these strict etiquette guidelines, a lot of parents still feel like they should pay for something when their child gets married. This can be really helpful, because it can drastically increase your budget. But at the same time, be aware that family members who are paying for part of your wedding may feel like they should be involved in the decision-making process.

For example, if your very Christian grandmother is paying for your wedding, she may expect you to get married at her church. If your parents are helping to pay for things, they may expect to have input on some aspects of the ceremony or reception. This can sometimes spiral into someone else planning the wedding they want you to have while you get given a backseat in the decision-making.

This might be absolutely okay with you. I was glad to let my mom help me plan the reception, because I know she and I have similar tastes and would be on the same page. It was actually a relief to let someone else take over the catering math! When my future mother-in-law offered to pay for our wedding shower, I was thankful because it meant I could let her and her daughters take over planning for that event. More hands, brains, and wallets to help plan means less work for the couple themselves.

At the same time, my fiance and I are paying for 100% of the ceremony costs so we can be sure we have 100% creative control over that aspect of our wedding. It's important to us that we have the ritual we want, without debating over details with non-pagan family members.

This is my advice for other couples: don't let anybody pay for anything unless you'll be okay sharing creative control over that part of your wedding. Your family may not expect to have veto privileges just because they signed a check -- but you don't want to risk finding out after everything has been booked that your preferences have been overruled, or that a relative has backed out on their financial commitment because they don't approve of your choices.

Thankfully, there are lots of events and expenses traditionally associated with Western weddings, so it's easy to find things for family to pay for if they want to contribute financially. Maybe they'd like to host your engagement party or pay for part of your honeymoon. Or you can delegate very specific tasks that you're okay letting go of, like asking your in-laws to be in charge of the flowers or asking your parents to handle the cake. You know your family, and you know how involved you want them to be.

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falcatamandarina · 22 days

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Tav and Vardana character worksheet

Thanks @hybernating-bear for the tag. I am gonna try this as an English practice (sorry if I misspell something or if it can’t be understood). I am gonna talk about my two ‘Tavs’ since they are siblings and the background is the same.

Tagging @necroticyuzu , @vo09 and @elven-e-girl (I dont want to annoy you, no pressure, just an invitation)

Names: Tav (the elder one) and Vardana (the younger one) from Winterwood.

Tav is just Tav, because I like it (and I love ‘Gustavo’ name). Vardana is misspelled ‘bardana’ , a name of a plant (I believe it is ‘burdock’ in English). I like how this plant grows up in wild places.

Gender: Tav is male; Vardana is female.

Sexuality: Tav is gay, Bardana is heterosexual.

Pronouns: He/him and She/her,

O T H E R

Family: The important figure here is their grandmother, a Kelemvor cleric, a Doomguide and an exceptional duelist. Her name was Tabitha from Winterwood in Interior Faerûn and she was a human who, after a long life of adventures, became an hermit and recluded herself in Winterwood to help some little half blooded villages, since the wood has a lot of tension between orcs, dragons, lizards and woodelven. Tav and Vardana’s father was an adventure bard that fell in love with a drow and was killed by her when she was tired of a simple life. The little ones were raised by the grandma in Kelemvor ways and that’s why they are both kelemvorites clerics and don’t have any idea about drow culture. In fact their physical appearance is human-like.

Birthplace: Winterwood. They were raised there and completed tasks helping Tabitha. For instance, they were trying to eradicate Myrkul and Bhaal cults in the region.

Job: Clerics, but Tav is the ‘blessed’ one. He is more skilled in the magic of his God. He is also a good bard and a duelist, like her grandma. Vardana developed herself more as a warrior (an Orc friend of the grandma trained her), due the drow skills and a lack of divine magic (for some reason it seems that Kelemvor only gifted her with basic cleric abilities).

Phobia: Tav fears deep water. Vardana is afraid of her God not replying to her, that’s why she decided to protect and join Tav wherever he goes as a shadow. They are very dependent on one another.

Guilty pleasure: Sometimes they have cruel pulsions, but can control them thanks to the strict training and their strong beliefs.

Hobbies: Tav likes to spend time playing the lira and composing silly songs. He is a very joyful fellow. Vardana is silent most of the time, and she likes training, training and training.

M O R A L S

Alignment: Lawful Good (both), but Tav could be chaotical in some situations.

Sins: Tav enjoys tricking enemies and being a traitor to them. He feels really fine when they realize he has betrayed them and can’t do anything, it is his dark side. About Vardana, she doesn’t show it normally, but she is really possessive.

Virtues: A very strong moral sense. They are really kind with people in need and value kindness and cordiality.

T H I S O R T H A T

Introverted / Extroverted: Vardana is introverted in general (or quiet, at least). Tav is extremely extroverted.

Organized / Disorganized: She is organized, he is disorganized.

Close minded / Open minded: Both are open minded in general, except about their religion.

Calm / Anxious / Restless: She is really calm, but he is restless.

Disagreeable / Agreeable: Agreeable in general.

Cautious / Reckless: Cautious, all the time. Tav seems a little reckless, but it is a kind of mask.

Patient / Impatient: Patient in general, but Tav could be eager in specific situations.

Outspoken / Reserved: She is reserved as Hell. Tav is a nosy tattletale.

Leader / Follower / Flexible: Tav is the Leader, but it seems like an irresponsible one (at least externally). Vardana is a Follower but just with Tav, almost as a shadow in the case of following her brother.

Empathetic / Unempathetic: They both are Empathetic, except in the case you are a cold blooded murderer.

Optimist / Pessimist / Realist: Optimist. Their beliefs guide them on the topic.

Traditional / Modern: In between. They are very traditional about their religion and respect goodness above all, but open minded about everything else (as soon as ‘everything else’ is kindness). They really respect and follow laws, but they don’t care about laws that lack morality, the laws should externalize moral ideas.

Hardworking / Lazy: Hardworking, even when Tav could be mistaken as a lazy guy sometimes.

R E L A T I O N S H I P S

OTP: Tav adores Rolan, because he likes haughty grumpy wizards. Vardana simps Zevlor a lot, because she is a possessive crazy one deep inside who likes wet sad (and old) cats (even if the others don’t notice she is a damn simp). The siblings hadn’t seen tieflings in Faerûn Interior. The moment they saw them at Emerald Grove, they agreed that they were the cutest creatures ever (Yes, they talk to each other about their love interests, they truly get along as siblings and friends).

Brotp: Tav usually is doing silly things with Astarion and Karlach. He loves Jaheira's attitude as well. He also adores his ‘siblings-in-law’ and could do anything for Cal and Lia. Vardana gets along with Gale (they are simple, quiet and obsessive) and trains a lot with La’ezel. As strange as it sounds In Baldur’s Gate it is very common to see her and Naaber go around the city. She is Blurg’s penpal.

Notp: Wulbren. On the other hand, Tav insisted on killing Minthara himself in a horrible way, the same for Nere. The Emperor's betrayal was a hard blow for him (how did the squid dare to use his same modus operandi?). Vardana silently swore to kill Orin and Raphael the moment she met them, she hates manipulative and deranged fellows.

END

#tav bg3 #my tav #i play bg3 with two tavs #vardana #tav

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makingspiritualityreal · 3 months

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Is it true that ketu in the 8th house makes a person have a terrible love life and bad married life?

Ketu in the 8th House and Relationship Life

Well I have that position so I'm uniquely qualified to answer.

This is an overgeneralisation, but it does make for some chaos in personal life. Those who have nothing but benefics in houses 2 and 8 take for granted how much ease and stability they have in their lives. They should talk to anyone with nodes in houses 2nd or 8th to see how great they have it.

To be able to understand this, you need to look at the polarity of houses 2nd and 8th. They're our foundation of reliance. While the 1st house is the sense of self, the 2nd house is self reliance. That self reliance comes from family, people so connected to you they support you unconditionally and feel like an extension of you.

Now with Rahu there the situation will be original and unique. Depending on the dispositor of Rahu, that can work for better or for worse. You need to look at the position of Jupiter. You can either have a family that is original in itself and supports your unique values or identity, or you can have losses in your birth family. For instance, I met my husband through astrology because it's something we both participate in creating. So the family I have with him through marriage represents my value of spiritual seeking as we connect in this endeavour. I don't glorify birth family, or any family for family's sake for that matter. The 2nd house teaches you, that things that support you are only as good as they are useful. Your family should be useful to you, that is the principle behind it. Your family should support your self worth, and if it doesn't, you are better off alone, or with strangers, as long as they believe in you too.

And this is the situation you encounter when Rahu is somehow challenged in the horoscope. A person that stands up for their self worth unconditionally even if that means being alone. A person that values their time and themselves because they want the time to be quality time. A person that believes in themselves and doesn't need anyone who doesn't believe in them.

Now how is that relevant to Ketu in the 8th? Well, if you don't believe in yourself, you end up clinging even to the worst partner. You can be the kind of person that wants to be joined at the hip, can't stand being alone. This invites disrespect and abusive relationships, because quite frankly these people agree to them.

Sometimes, sadly, it is circumstantial. We are born into a certain family and we only have that much at our disposal. Until we are old enough to make a life for ourselves and move out, we can only do that much. In this case, a healthy Ketu here will isolate from unhealthy birth family as much as possible.

This Ketu doesn't say you can't have a relationship. It says that you will have that support if you believe in yourself enough to know you're worthy of having one. I waited 30 years to get married and my husband was also my first serious "boyfriend". But that only happened because I believed in myself enough to change my life to have that relationship.

The Nodes rule things foreign, so you may end up with a partner of a different cultural background. They also rule mental and emotional problems, so you may end up with partners with psychological complexities. But you need to look at a lot of aspects in your chart to find out in detail how that works for you.

#astrology asks #private astro asks #astrology #astro notes #astro observations

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floating--goblin · 4 months

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anyway. hyper specific ministry headcanons

Layout

It's made up of one large central building shaped like a Grucifix, and several annexes

Actually not that big or ostentatious a place, it's elegant but utilitarian. The church isn't made of money, y'know

There are however many secret escape passages, that are well-maintained and of critical importance. New members get taught how to escape any area of the Ministry, in case of an attack.

There's a reason the gates are so well guarded, after all.

Most of the estate is actually just made up of fields, a bit of forest, and a portion of a river, used for baptisms.

There's a cemetery that doubles as a garden, because memento mori and all that. It's very lovely, very ornate, full of old statues and well-cared-for trees

There's a big fountain in the middle affectionately called the Spring of Saints, because the statues on it are supposedly figures of importance to the Ministry, like Jezebel. That, however, has not been confirmed, and who exactly the figures are is up to interpretation.

All Papas share a study, that gets passed down by the retiring Papa to his successor. As a result, over time it just filled up with all sorts of items left behind by previous Papas.

Most of the congregation lives in dorms in the main building, with some annexes being reserved for families

The library is open to every member, and hosts a surprisingly low number of Satanic texts-- mostly because there just aren't that many.

It does however have copies of pretty much every religious text, so that members can remain informed and make their own decisions on their faith.

Social structure

Anyone may join. While the Ministry's goal is indeed to convert, it doesn't mean to do that by force-- so people who just need a place to stay are welcome, albeit hosted in one of the annexes and not included in any important rites. Black mass or baptisms are free to witness, though.

Human sacrifices are practiced, but not in the traditional sense-- no one's getting killed, but blood can be willingly offered, in moderation. Other forms of "human sacrifice" are work done for the Ministry, good deeds, counseling, etc.

Suffering is never demanded by doctrine. Members are invited to indulge in all great aspects of life, safely and within reason, and to lean on one another through hardship.

There are twelve Cardinals at any given time, mirroring the Apostles. They are elected mainly based on work ethic and can have any age or gender. The title isn't as prestigious as one would think, but they do have more duties than the average member-- most often they're in charge of sermons, counseling or training the choir.

Despite their reputation, Sisters of Sin aren't required to dress a certain way or to engage in anything sexual. They represent an inverse of Christian purity culture, but that only requires a certain attitude, not certain acts.

Those who are comfortable dressing more provocatively are however most often picked for public appearances, but that's only because the Ministry means to send a message to the mainstream. All Sisters are valued equally and highly respected within the church.

The same goes for Brothers and other Siblings; though they don't have as much of a public presence because of the way the Ministry chooses to present itself, they aren't any less important.

There isn't a proper hierarchy to the Siblings, but the eldest/most responsible/most beloved of them is often given the affectionate title of Prime Mover or Mother Superior (regardless of gender), and is unofficially in charge of everyone.

Surprisingly, there are children in the Abbey-- be they children of members, orphans or troubled youth who just ended up the Abbey's doorstep. They live much more secular lives and don't have access to all spaces, but can be part of the choir or assist in some rituals.

They are, however, treasured! And the church has a bit of a culture of raising kids communally. While childcare duties aren't forced on anyone, every member does have the responsibility of keeping the kids safe at the very least.

Speaking of families, while the Ministry isn't really in the business of marrying people, it's not like they forbid love. A bonding ritual may be performed, upon request, for sentimental purposes.

Anyone found to have harmed another member willingly is immediately expelled and, if the deed calls it, reported to the police. Especially monstrous offenses are faced with much more grim consequences before all of that, though.

Let's just say, ghouls are great at making someone look like they got stalked by a pack of wolves through a hundred acres of woodland.

The Ghouls

They're an... interesting bunch.

While they're counted as a separate group from the bulk of the congregation, they're neither above nor below your typical Sibling. They're just a different kind of beings.

Their duties range from kitchen work, to guarding the premises, to of course representing the band-- all things that Siblings do, save for the last one.

Despite being demonic in nature, they aren't demons per se. They are technically speaking a class of lesser demon, but they are not hellborn.

Instead, they are the souls of humans that returned to haunt their own bodies.

Their undead nature gives them some uncanny attributes, but when it comes down to it, they are very similar to humans.

Their bodies aren't quite right, though-- they're sometimes too hot or too cold, their hearts don't always beat, some of them miss vital organs and live well without them. By all means, those are living bodies-- they're not zombies, they don't rot, and all basic functions are there-- but there's anomalies that are just unexplainable.

They are always masked not only as a sign of service, but because their faces aren't... all the way there. A quick glance from afar will have you convinced you're just seeing another person, but look too closely or for too long and that illusion falters. There isn't one single thing you can point out as being wrong, but they're just... wrong. Like crude approximations of human faces, made by something fundamentally detached from humanity.

Some say they look that way because faces are a reflection of the soul, and they reconstructed their faces from memory the way they used to feel it before death. It would explain why some ghouls are so expressive in a way that's closer to caricature than anything natural.

They also retain no knowledge of their previous lives, save for some sensory or muscle memory, maybe a vague idea of where they used to live.

However, of course, they are not without personalities! Those personalities just tend to be based on lived experience from after they died. Whether anything from before remains is difficult to tell.

Elements aren't indicative of any magic properties, they're just designations based on their role in the band.

In fact, ghouls don't have much in the way of magic powers-- they're inherently magical by being demonic, but that mainly comes in the way they're built.

Still, some are especially good at reading emotions and intentions, though that can be written off as a heightened sensitivity earned after death.

Some people might see claws, tails, fangs or horns on the ghouls, though these features aren't physically present. The way that ghouls move, being so theatrical and bordering on animalistic, can sometimes cause these impressions.

By tradition in some parts of Europe, especially wicked or "mad" people were thought to become ghouls after death; as a result, they'd get nailed down in their coffins so they couldn't awaken and hunt down their families, often times through their hearts, hands and/or mouths. Some ghouls in the Ministry retain these marks, along with the knowledge that they used to be viewed as monsters in their first lives.

They don't speak often unless communicating with humans, because ghouls can easily understand one another. As a result, they also don't give each other names. It's just not necessary. Their human peers can give them nicknames for convenience sake, though.

They live in the Den, a large hall underneath the Ministry that resembles an inverted cathedral, and all share that space. Things like privacy aren't exactly important to ghouls, nor do they have strict concepts of monogamy, romantic or platonic attraction. They're a very tight-knit group and those sorts of labels just don't have any relevance.

Siblings call the Ministry's ghoul population the pack.

They tend to be big on casual physical affection, maybe due to their nature as undead outcasts.

Much like their human counterparts, community is very important to ghouls. If a member of the pack is suffering for whatever reason, the others will stick by their side, fiercely defend them and do anything to help. No questions asked.

#THIS IS LONG AND STUPID just keep in mind if you choose to click that keep reading button #the band ghost #nameless ghouls

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not-terezi-pyrope · 1 year

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Reposting this because OP is a coward and blocked me, which apparently now removes my responses from the notes.

The case that works created by machine learning systems are somehow more derivative than the output of any person who is engaged with their culture (we all learn from what we read and hear, folks!) is already absurd, but. Imagine claiming that you've been stolen from by a machine learning algorithm pulling metadata from web text to build a language distribution model when you yourself are writing fanfiction, which is directly based on the work of others. What happened to "everything is a remix?" This website flipped to rabid copyright worship the minute somebody yelled that the scary machines were coming, which is ironic because nothing these AIs are producing, bar cases of wilful human mimicry and some of bad data, has any identifiable/tangible connection to existing human works at all. If you want to go join the IP lawyers trying to take down the OfTW then go do that, but don't try and make the double standard mesh because one is your hobby and the other is spooky computer science you feel threatened by.

"Cultural devaluation of human expression"; we already live under capitalism, which has always been able to exploit people to churn out schlock that will make money. In fact, the corporations you are concerned about can buy the rights to training text, so this complaint doesn't even concern them. This isn't Big Tech invading a space, this is people having fun by asking a machine to write about the characters they like. Start finding value in your own artistic voice rather than pushing this culture club exceptionalist entitlement to all works made in your medium. Nothing has been stolen from you except your dignity, and it wasn't AI that took it.

That said probably don't put AI output on AO3 without clear tagging, it's not good enough to be read as actual fic at the moment and so is essentially spam.

#not-terezi-speaks #ai #writing #hot take cw

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xxlovelynovaxx · 10 months

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It is, by definition, gatekeeping. Gatekeeping isn't always bad (gatekeeping bigots) but in this case it's intellectually wrong and also pointless.

Also, punk is a music-BASED subculture. There are a million aspects of it that exists outside of the music. It from the start evolved past being just about music.

Or do you think cripplepunks, neuropunks, pluralpunks, etc etc, are all poseurs if they don't listen to punk music?

Punk is about rebellion, about fighting the system. Punk music is punk because it carries those themes. The music is secondary to the middle finger to the man. The subculture evolved out of the message of the music, including the choice of instruments and chord progressions as well as the lyrics, but the message is and always had been a more central element than the music itself. The music is uneven frosting on the funky-looking homemade cake that is punk.

The values ARE what punk is. The music spread them. You have this all backwards.

THE MUSIC WOULDN'T EXIST WITHOUT THE VALUES.

Oh and btw? Yeah, this is TOTALLY gonna make more people listen to punk. Oh wait! You don't want people to actually check out the music and join you in enjoying the entire subculture, because this isn't about you encouraging people to become fans of something you like. It's just about you wanting to be the special-est little listener and be admired for all the niche bands you listen to that all the ordinary normies don't because they're not as special as you.

It's about you not wanting people who aren't as "cool" (or, alternatively, uncool, which you've elevated as an equivalency to what most people think about coolness) to join you in the exclusive punkuntry club you've created. Which is about the most un-punk thing I can think of.

Anyway, for people who actually WANT to join the music PART of the subculture, @/polyamorouspunk has some good links/maybe masterlists iirc? For all the subcultures I'm in, I always am so excited to openly share my special interest in the art facets of the culture and introduce people to them. I'd just prefer not to wipe the wide-eyed wonder from their eyes before I even begin.

#punk

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alicent-vi-britannia · 11 months

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The reinterpretation of the Faustian legend in Code Geass

In Code Geass Season 1 Episode 23, Lelouch rejects Kaguya's marriage proposal, claiming that he had made a pact with the demon. Fanboys made light of this comment as C.C. was present listening to them. But this was one of the few moments where the series was being direct with its audience and expressing its intentions through its main character.

Code Geass can be seen and valued as a modern reinterpretation of the German legend of Faust (I don't doubt that each culture will have its own archetype to talk about these issues, however, given that we are Westerners and that the IIWW taught us that the Japanese and the Germans are cut from the same cloth, I will explain myself through this legend which, after all, is the most famous worldwide).

In case you have been living under a rock for all these years and have never heard of this legend, I will quickly put you in context: Faust is a genius who makes a deal with the devil in which he exchanges his soul for what he most desires, without knowing that by doing so he is condemning himself. This is the premise of the legend and of subsequent adaptations. The details then vary. In essence, this reveals to us that the demon, like the Geass, is able to see the human heart and figure out his deepest desire to give it to him. The problem is that that desire is corrupted. Mao and C.C. realized that.

What did C.C. want? She wanted to get love in the purest and most sincere sense. But the love she received from people under the influence of her Geass was not true love. It was a sick obsession. "Love without limit was love without meaning. I forgot what love really was," explained C.C. "I'm so tired of all the proposals and flowers. Now some of them are starting a religion around me," said young C.C. in the flashback.

What did Mao want? He wanted to understand why he had been abandoned by his family. Hence he received the power to access minds. But reading the thoughts of others or, rather, understanding human nature became hateful to him to the point that people generated disgust and contempt for him. C.C. was the only person truly human to him, even if she didn't think so.

Overwhelmed by his powers, Mao and C.C. refused their wish and were punished (remember that in the flashback to the moment C.C. accepts the code, she had the Geass active in both eyes, which was an indication that she couldn't deactivate it like Mao and Lelouch). Why? Because once you make a Faustian deal, there's no going back. There are no concessions or returns. You must fulfill the deal until its last consequences.

Lelouch didn't realize that his Geass was an evil power until the incident with Euphemia. What happened in episode 22 exactly? That Lelouch was in a conflict. Even though he planned to use the Geass on Euphemia to force her to shoot him so he could fake his death so that the Japanese would forever distrust Britannia and Zero could show himself as the only savior, Lelouch didn't want to hurt to Euphemia actually. This is the reason why Lelouch's eye hurt where the Geass was. He knew deep down that he would join Euphemia if she pushed him hard enough and he knew, furthermore, that this was against his goal, because what does Lelouch want? He doesn't want to be subservient to anyone, he wants to be independent, to be recognized and, last but not least, he wants to destroy Britannia. That desire stems from his childhood trauma.

And, if Lelouch sided with Euphemia, he would ruin everything he had been working for up until now as he would have to unmask himself and submit to Britannia. Therefore, he would be betraying the contract that Lelouch had made with himself by accepting the Geass. Thus, the Geass is linked to the desire of the heart. Think for a moment, why couldn't the forgetful Lelouch use his Geass, even though he had it activated permanently? Because Lelouch is who he is thanks to his memories and it was Lelouch vi Britannia, the prince who was disowned by his father and who longed to destroy Britannia, who made the contract. A Geass can be broken if the will of the victim is stronger than that of the Geass bearer. We see this with Nunnally. She broke Charles' Geass because at that moment her will was stronger than his at the time he used his Geass on her.

In this way, the permanent activation of the Geass was the way to keep Lelouch, Mao and C.C. on the way to their wish. The emperor is the exception that proves the rule. In theory, he claims that he wants to create a world without lies. However, he lies in everything he does. He lied to his brother, to Lelouch, to Nunnally and to his entire empire. Charles likely has a deeper, selfish desire that is never revealed to the audience.

What we can be sure of is that the Emperor never went against his wishes since he has no permanent Geass. C.C. and Mao had a Geass that can’t be turned off. Lelouch needed special contact lenses to hide his. Charles never needed this. He has a double Geass, so to speak, that can be deactivated. Therefore, we know that the permanent Geass is not a stage in the evolution of Geass. Of all the characters with Geass, only Lelouch, C.C. and Mao, who explicitly opposed their Geass, were the only ones to get a permanent one.

Either way, all Geass users paid the price, and what is the price? Is it the human soul? Pffff! Lelouch almost ripped his soul from his body to move on. For he was willing to sacrifice his mind, his conscience, his humanity. But he wasn't willing to sacrifice his loved ones (Shirley, Kallen and Nunnally mainly, although, in correct terms, it's the entire student council, including Rolo) and that's what the Geass claimed from him in the end. Because the price of the Faustic deal is to strip you of your most valuable possessions, which generally translates into the people you love. "The power of kings will isolate you."

That's why C.C. was afraid that Lelouch would hate her for giving him the Geass and Lelouch eases her anxiety by denying it. He doesn't forgive her just because his affection for her is greater than any grudge he harbored against her (that's totally secondary in Lelouch's case), but because Lelouch has the moral courage to admit that it was his choices that led him down that road destructive route, until the Zero Requiem.

Lelouch is a Faustian soul and therefore he is guided by a will to succumb. What I mean by this? That he is touched by fate and that kind of person has the gift of making all the wrong decisions that are going to doom him. And Lelouch screwed up like nobody else and, in unison, did evil. Some of his decisions were the product of misjudgment and most were made deliberately. For example, the betrayal of the Black Knights, Shirley's fall from grace, and the decimation of the Tokyo Settlement were consequences of his actions. Lelouch is a modern tragic character, in every definition.

Of course, this has a positive side. Otherwise, C.C. could not have ended well despite her immortality, nor would Lelouch have died with a smile, nor would the creators consider that Code Geass had a happy ending. It's just that I focused on the dark part because I was talking about the Mephistophelian treatment.

Tell me, did you already know the legend? Did they identify the Faustian treatment? What did you think of the little analysis?

PS: Before you ask me, yes Larry, Death Note is another reinterpretation of the Faustian legend, a little more obvious and with a much more malevolent Faust (like Christopher Marlowe's version).

#code geass #code geass: lelouch of the rebellion #lelouch lamperouge #lelouch vi britannia #lelouch #c.c. (code geass)

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kinocomix · 2 months

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devlog 17: things my therapist told me

the script for TSTW is still coming along. the first couple of scenes are the most sensitive ones because they effectively have to hook the reader when little has happened in the story, so I can confidently say that those 8 scenes have been polished enough that I don’t have to worry about them anymore. Now, the main plot begins.

here’s the soundtrack for the rest of this devlog:

youtube

I don’t think there could ever be a fully professional way to talk about the things that heavily affected you as a kid. As an adult, I had to wrestle with the fact that there’s never really a good time to talk about feelings and be happy. There’s always someone in the world suffering more than you, someone dying and something terrible happening to the children of a country being genocided by zionism (free palestine).

Today I’m going to talk about the themes at play in “The criminal mastermind’s pocket diary”, the project I’m working on while writing the script for my other comic, which is coming along well. While a lot of what I’m going to talk about will pale in comparison to the suffering of others in the world, I find it valuable to remember that in order to fight the dragons that plague the world we must confront and quell the evil within each and every one of us.

With that in mind, one thing I haven’t mentioned about the central point of killouette is that in more than one way, her experience is very much my own. Growing up in Beyrouth it seemed like there was one of three options: you’re either born with money in which case your safety can be bought via being in safer areas and schools, or you’re in a middle/lower class area where you’re stuck with the other two choices. One is to pass the time on the street and acquire the culture thereof, the other is to be an indoor kid. My parents, who had good intentions, decided that the best course of action to not have me become a thug was to never let me leave the house except to go to school or family outings. Combine that with a poor financial situation and a tiny house, it meant that growing up I didn’t have the internet, and could rarely take up the space required to do activities. Doing something as simple as reading a book was complicated because most of our books were stored in the sofas which were designed to maximize what we could do in our tiny house. It doesn’t end there, you see my mother has always been a clean freak, so she valued tidiness over most other things. Now imagine all that for a second. An understimulated child, often told they’re “gifted” who could never explore the world or do many things inside either. you can see how that’s a recipe for someone with the personality of a blank sheet of printer paper.

It’s not all doom and gloom though. I still had some fun because I, in addition to being cursed with the gifted label, had an overactive imagination. So the underside of beds became forts, and broken appliances became experiments. The few friends I had at school became a window into the outside… I eventually became a normal human being but there’s something about that entire period in my life that made me feel very bitter towards my parents. Why were you throwing your anxieties onto me? Why couldn’t I just join the scouts? Why couldn’t I stay over at a friend’s house for longer than two hours? Looking back at all of that having gone to therapy I’m thankful for it. I don’t think I would have fallen madly in love with the craft of comics had it not been for me overcompensating for all those missed years. Part of me really wants to heal that inner kid in my head who still wishes for some adventure though. That’s killouette.

Killouette’s parents are much like mine. Not evil, just a little overprotective. Projecting just enough that it’ll seep into killouette’s behavior as an adult. But now, as a kid, I’m giving her something that I wished I had when I was a child: privacy and space. Killouette has her own room and her parents don’t feel the need to constantly police her as long as she’s in there. That might not seem like much, but I think that would be enough for a smart kid to do some pretty amazing things.

you may have also noticed that Killouette doesn’t have any noteworthy character flaws, and it should be obvious at this point that the goal of me making this is in part to empower her. With that being said I am fully aware that while my experience is relatively common, it’s far from universal. This is why the cast is so varied: each child represents to some extent a different way of growing up. I can’t do them all sadly, but I think the grounds will be covered pretty well with what we have.

there’s also other kids to consider, so I have some things I want to explore with them as well. I don’t want to spoil too much but here’s a quick fire round: Talbas has anger issues because of neglect and video games. bata has well meaning parents but the constant taunting and threats of being sent to far away places cause anxiety in the way she acts. motsik has the most ass, dogshit parents. 0/10 not having a good time. abuse central, destination anywhere else. falefil is spoiled and his parents haven’t taught him certain things about respect and money. that tends to influence his behavior. zmik is the closest to killouette, except he is a version of her closer to me allowed to leave the house. he’s included in the cast partially as a way for me to extent empathy to a younger me, but also for anyone who might be going through something similar to what i did as a kid. lastly there’s claude. claude is for all intents and purposes, if we were to put her in a realistic framework, some weird mish mash of immigrant and orphan child genius. i imagine claude would experience some alienation from some people, but i’m not worried about the story getting sidetracked since her friends have her back and the adults in the story are losers anyways.

On a more general note, I’ve been noticing how my approach to writing has been evolving to suit whatever project I'm currently working on. It was weird at first cause I thought a writing technique is something that you’re just stuck with. With prior comics for example the main concern was always “how do I portray what’s happening in the most raw way possible” whereas with TSTW it’s more “let’s try to be more efficient with the framing of the ideas, as long as it feels right”. With Killouette, it’s not about showing things in the most realistic way possible because if that was the case, for starters this amount of genius kids would not be two buildings apart in some suburb in beyrouth and killouette would not be able to hide the amount of things she does. but that’s not the point. a bunch of what happens in the story could happen with real kids in real life, and the point of the book is to capture a young sense of ambition and wonder. the type of mischief that leaves you laughing and being impressed instead of wondering what’s happening in the world. I’m not here to tell you about kids committing actual awful actions, I'm here to show you kids having a good time despite it all. that nothing can stop life and the desire for it.

If the kids of Palestine can still find it in them to laugh and have fun, the least I can do is have some imaginary abused kids triumph over their circumstances.

next week, we’ll be improvising some doodads and seeing how we can recycle previous unused work.

devlog updates on Tuesdays.

#comic #webcomic #kinocomix #devlog #journal comic #Youtube

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pens-in-a-jam-jar · 8 months

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Hi- sorry, was forced to use my main bc for some reason Tumblr doesn't let me ask with my side account for rwd-

Who's who in your Utena au?

*fLAILING!!!* (also yea I think that's like. An intentional thing Tumblr does, not entirely sure why.)

Okay so we of course know Dani = Utena, VR-LA = Anthy. Starting with my strongest choices then going on in no particular order:

Roy is our Wakaba. He has to be. Roy fucking tackling Dani nearly sending both of them tumbling into the courtyard?? Dani initially joining in on the duels over his honor not knowing what the fuck she's truly getting herself into??? Roy being jealous over how much time she spends with VR-LA now???? The Black Rose Arc??????? It's so good It's So Good!!!

For my next strongest choice: MR-SN as Dios. Obviously. If I'm fucking with the theming to be less about gender roles and more about class/caste roles (as is the case when I've changed the 'because you're a girl' line into 'because you are nothing') then of course MR-SN needs to be the image of The Perfect Self-Made Captain In Charge.

However: the situation with Dios vs Akio is weird. Because everyone from Akio and Dios themselves to the visual language the show uses present the two of them as two completely separate people, and Anthy and her brother are clearly not mortal humans. Anthy has been suffering constantly for long enough that the event that started this and the folk tale version of the event passed down culturally bear next to no resemblance to one another. So we could frame it as Dios and Akio being different aspects of the same conceptual being. Dios died in the same way Pan greek god of the wild died. He's dead because people say he is, but he can never be gone forever. In Dios's case, he has been replaced by a version of himself that 'grew up' and 'lost his nobility'. He's still Anthy's older brother, but he is not Dios.

We're gonna make the call that they're to be represented by different characters and have DX-TR be Akio, mainly for his connection to VR-LA and the fact that he canonically killed Dani once.

Emi is Chu-Chu. Enough said. No notes.

I'm choosing a Nanami next because she's my favorite. Davion is our Nanami. Because think about it: Nanami is introduced lashing out at Anthy because Anthy is valued and coveted by the world and has the attention and (as far as Nanami can tell) affection of her older brother who Nanami sees as her whole world. It's infuriatingly unfair to her that Anthy would be (from Nanami's point of view) constantly rewarded with adoration and protection for what Nanami intuitively clocks as an act. Even if it's a 'there's no way, she's too good to be true' kind of impulse, she is right! Anthy performs this perfect feminine damsel image that everyone defines her by, and Nanami cannot fucking stand that seemingly everyone values Anthy over Nanami for ~performing well~. Anthy gets everything just for being fake and that's just not fair! What kind of vampiric freak does that on purpose??

If we are changing the themes to be about class roles and meritocracy instead of gender roles, of course Davion would make an excellent Nanami, because VR-LA himself says 'Competence is not a good look on you, Davion' in canon and he just fuckin' takes it. But what if he had reason to Fucking Hate VR-LA For It? Think of the drama: Davion calling VR-LA captain as a dig because they both know that's not his real station and VR-LA smiling back at him in that unsettling way Anthy smiles at Nanami. Davion realizing Dani is special for some ephemeral reason he doesn't understand despite knowing for a fact she's lower on the totem pole that him and VR-LA, and he shouldn't be bothered by the things she says and does But He Is! Davion being constantly suspicious of both of them yet constantly hovering around them trying to understand.

Another fun casting: Cassimere as Sayoji. Top notch I'd say. Do I even need to explain this one? The exchange diary scenes alone would be fucking hysterical, and the scene of Anthy fully dropping the way she used to speak to Sayonji but with VR-LA and Cassimere? Perfection.

If Cassimere is Sayonji, I would then posit K-LB as Touga and I know that's horribly cursed and their personalities aren't even a little similar, but like think about it: K-LB and Dani interacting with the leadership and ownership they're aiming for in wildly different ways the same way Touga and Utena interact with the idea of masculinity and princeliness in ways that cause them to clash yet that they both almost understand one another over. K-LB being close to DX-TR because DX-TR has promised him the way to view 'something eternal'. K-LB winning VR-LA and chatting with him all chipper-like asking him some of the same questions he's seen Dani ask him and getting different answers. K-LB trying one last time to make some kind of executive decision over Dani and VR-LA at the end, begging them not to listen to End of the World and Dani Just Not Trusting Him. I love it. Tastey drama.

I'm making Elyse, Love and Finbar my Shiori, Ruka, and Juri respectively. This feels really mean to Specifically Elyse but also the three of them would be So Fucking Good for this??? I promise, I promise it's a good idea. I'm so sorry Elyse.

Kyana and Ione as Miki and Kozue? The fuckin' Tastey Drama??? Codependency my (fictional) beloved!! The duels with Miki and Utena, but with Kyana and Dani CAN YOU IMAGINE?

Oh god. I Completely On Accident made it so the badminton scene would be happening between the 3 non-VR-LA members of the og crew absjdhskzbazoxbxg

#rolling with difficulty #asks #dani rwd #kyana rwd #finbar rwd #vr-la rwd #revolutionary with difficulty #rwd au #i love this I love this I love this #words from the jam jar

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tentative-wanderer · 8 months

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Reviews: Homophobic Cop Marries Gay Ghost, President’s Son Gets Together with Prince

Recently watched 2 movies with gay main characters in different genres. One was Red, White & Royal Blue (available on Amazon), one was 🌟 Marry My Dead Body 关于我和鬼变成家人的那件事 (available on Netflix). Spoiler-free thoughts below 😊:

❤️🤍💙 Red, White & Royal Blue is an American romcom. It has a 10/10 trailer—incredibly inviting. The movie depicts many women in power, I love that! Many witty jokes, nice! The movie might be better if it were a drama series instead; to save time, it zoomed through the falling-in-love part with the use of text messages—the production team packaged that as well as they could, but it was still too rushed. The ending left me wondering if there could’ve been a tiny bit more to make it feel more complete. Though the movie doesn’t score as highly as its trailer in my opinion, it’s still a decent movie.

(That reminds me of how That Musical Montage in episode 1 of the Heaven Official’s Blessing donghua made me super keen to watch the rest of the series, but it turns out that that was the best part. Quality-wise, Red, White & Royal Blue is overall better than the TGCF donghua though.)

👻👮‍♂️💓 Marry My Dead Body is a Taiwanese mystery + comedy + supernatural movie. Let me copy the blurb from Google: “Wu Ming-Han, a straight policeman who is homophobic and ghost-phobic, accidentally picks up a red wedding envelope while collecting evidence. He finds himself betrothed to the envelope's owner Mao Pang-Yu, a gay man who died under mysterious circumstances. The duo must work through their differences and join forces to solve the case, seeking justice for Mao.” (Real-life context: marriages between dead people and live ones are/were an actual thing in Chinese culture.)

I’ve just finished watching this movie, love it! Let me get the “con” out of the way first: I wish the movie ended differently! The ending was not unsatisfying, it’s just that I personally could have been more satisfied.

Okay, now I am free to gush.

This movie is HILARIOUS. Won’t describe the humour here, you can see it in the trailers on YouTube.

I love the unravelling of the mysteries (police cases). The feelings would not have hit half as hard without them and the exploration of Maomao’s non-romantic relationships (formed during his life) after his death. Even though I highly value a good plot apart from the romance when I read/watch something, I like talking about feelings more, so that’s what I’ll do.

I have Intense Feelings about these guys. They went from being Not Keen about getting stuck with each other to being really cute together—I notice that the movie managed to do this EVEN WITHOUT having them hold hands or do anything physical beyond that. That is crazy. Romantic physical contact is great, but if you can show chemistry without it, and with minimal flirting—that is exceptional.

(Side note: I think it would be harder to convincingly depict a heterosexual pair arriving at romantic feelings the way Wu Ming-Han and Maomao did: (partly) through constant banter and trading barbs. A man looking down on a woman would have come across as a lot meaner because the threat that poses is larger in the patriarchal society we live in.)

Wu Minghan went from casually homophobic to being on track for bisexuality for a ghost, such character development. The scene where Wu Minghan genuinely calls Maomao “my husband” for the first time is AMAZING, unexpected. At that moment I was like, oh my god, he loves him. Or at the very least, he has good potential. It had taken a series of hilarious strong-arming, including a close call with the loss of Wu Minghan’s family jewels, to make this dude marry Maomao, but now he’s calling Maomao husband—in that particular state, at that timing. I cried. I was smiling at many points throughout the movie, I also cried at some points. I said something similar when I wrote my review for Merman’s Fall: a book/movie that makes me laugh and cry will go at the top of my favourites list. Unlike my danmei list, my favourite movies list is too short for me to put Marry My Dead Body at the top or bottom, but it’s definitely in there.

#red white and royal blue #red white & royal blue #rwrb #marry my dead body #关于我和鬼变成家人的那件事 #關於我和鬼變成家人的那件事 #rwarb #I have no clue whether it is more helpful for readers if I write spoilery or spoiler-free thoughts when I write about books and movies #99.99999999% of people who see these posts probably don’t care anyway #if that is so #I might do as I please #I write to relive joy #my stuff

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enneamage · 1 year

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hi i dont know how to start this so im just going to get right into it

i never understood why twitter got so mad at this clip ever since i saw it live i actually thought i was more good than bad? that might sound crazy but the fact as a 16 year old cis guy got called a lesbian and didnt go "ew im not a LESBIAN!??!" and actually thought about it for a second.

i think thats perfectly normal at that age to wonder that to wonder about your sexual and gender identity. hell i did and i think if i never did that as a teen i would have never accepted the idea of me being a trans guy.

now this brings me to the point of this essay. i think if twitter didnt have a shit party over that clip he would be more comfortable expressing himself femininity and accepting his bisexuality.

sure he doesnt have a problem flirting with guys as we've seen but they've always been less "masc" than his whole "big man" persona i think he finds it easier to flirt with guys (with the exception of ranboo of course) if he views them as more fem or even as a women perhaps

im not one to truthing him being trans or clem being real but im not against it. this also isnt me truthing him as being trans. i think cis people expressing femininity and masculinity is so important male or female (femininity and masculinity are ALWAYS put as things that go inherently together, but for some reason theyre never put as things that compliment eachother but thats a whole different topic)

but what do i really know? i dont have an audience of 12 million on youtube and 7 miliion on twitch i cant imagine that many eyes on you just waiting to judge you on your every move

Anon I admire the drive but I’m afraid you’ve sent this to the person who authored the “Tommy being Bi won’t fix him” post, so I must stick to my convictions on this one.

(As an aside, for those who don’t know, meet Clementine!)

I was not directly around for The Lesbian Moment, but I think I heard the gunshots down the street. I think it’s hugely under-emphasised how everyone was on the back of a world-changing mass death event spread out over the course of at least two years around that time, and the way that it (reasonably, all things considered) affected the way people handled stress. People were very sensitised to a lot of things, and it doesn’t surprise me that this would be a case where zooming out from what the problem was ‘supposed to be about’ would reveal a massive soup of situational stressors looking for a fracturing point to express themselves.

As thousands of people were all suddenly shoved online to share the same spaces, the social processes involved with creating norms and group standards had tons of gas thrown on them. It was going to be messy no matter what, people were electing scapegoats left and right to set social standards about what was and wasn’t acceptable. This is grim but important context (Tw), lockdown was horrific for rates of at-home physical and sexual abuse. Being a woman online in general is a state of psychological warfare against an objectifying culture. I remember talk about how his audience was divided even then, a group of lesbians were like “hell yeah we can let Tommy join /nsrs” and then another group were not even remotely okay with that even as a joke.

People were sensitised to feeling invaded in a time where lockdown had personal agency down to record lows, especially for teenagers and children. In a world where you have next to no agency or personal control over your circumstances, having a say in dominant moral narratives and the accepted behavior of people skyrockets in value, because you’re constantly in other people’s power. People were profoundly invested in the few square inches of control that they could/did have, so they were deeply reactive with it. A lot of pandemic reactivity was the behavior of people who felt over-activated and cornered, so while it’s possible to critique the outrage and take it apart on the terms that it presented itself on, it’s important to understand it as part of a whole as well.

👏 ON TO THE GAY SHIT

I feel like what goes into Tommy flirting with each of the men he’s flirted with in the past has been a little bit different. Tubbo seemed like possessive best friend claiming mushed into a straight lens with a side of teasing (I like girls, I like Tubbo, Tubbo is girl.) Ranboo was a fascinating intersection of girlfriend sublimation and flirtation to raise his self-esteem, also a bit of an apology for the not-so-passive-aggression from when it looked like Ranboo had “stolen” Tubbo. I wasn’t around for TimeDeo, but fuck it, that counts too. I don’t think that the majority of his homosocial flirting was to make himself seem more masc, especially with Ranboo. (I’ll spare you examples but that particular stretch has some moments.)

Tommy had a ‘playing toughguy’ problem when he was younger, and it contributed to some of his worst habits in terms of what came out of his mouth. I would have attributed a lot of this to his environment, the influences that he related to both positively (edgy youtubers) and negatively (macho schoolmates.) He was very teenage boy, but even then he had an off-beat streak that I impressionistically related to as more femme, even when he was being abrasive. Ever since being forcibly civilised through Wilbur and the forces of the internet he’s had much less of that, but his femme streak has stayed in some form or another, just evolving to fit what’s needed of him at a given time.

The rate at which Tommy being a cishet man comes up as a genuine issue that people feel compelled to try and see resolved is interesting, even as someone who occasionally feels it myself. Like there’s got to be something to unpack in that dynamic, that whatever behavioral issue he’s experiencing at a given time feels tied to his identity as a cishet male and something that can be revised if he had the right personal revelations. The issue is, I just don’t think it’s true, or at least wouldn’t make the difference that some people would want it to make. Some of his problems could even be tied up in his Englishness, and that’s straight up incurable. It’s hard for me to imagine that having a sexuality related revelation would make that big of a difference in the grand scheme of… him as a person. He’s got a lot of moving parts.

I do feel some frustration on behalf Tommy in terms of being a target of essentialist thought. He’s not allowed to be as camp as he probably wants to be because it comes off as offensive to gay culture, and he’s not allowed to be overtly femme because people are strict about policing gender expression right now if a given person doesn’t take on a certain label that corresponds with it. He’s assumed to have the worst intentions if he isn’t directly part of a certain group, and he really is clumsy with things that he doesn’t understand so he can be better off sometimes keeping his hands inside his box, but it’s still kind of sad to see the roundabout way that these binaries re-enforce themselves with someone like him. At the same time, try not to mourn over ‘what could have been’, because it’s still a form of essentialism to think that having traits more commonly associated with non-cishet identity would solve his problem-of-the-week, and there’s no guarantee that’s the case.

#Tw: Violence #tw: SA mention #Tw: Assault #Tw: Abuse #Brief mention but still worth noting for being so abrupt #As you can tell I’ve been thinking this topic over for a while #I want him to have Queer Freedom as much as the next guy but it’s not the vital jenga block that will knock the rest of him into place #Him being a sticky little man is his journey. His path #mageessay #since this is the spiritual sequel to the first one

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peggy-sue-reads-a-book · 1 year

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Paper Cranes

TW: homophobia, bullying, church abuse, swearing, assault, ED, SH, compulsive exercising, Republicans, purity culture, evangelical crap, but most of all middle school. If I’ve failed to include anything, just let me know. Fr I wrote it for me and posted it for those who might find my experience affirming. I’m all good if you need to scroll right on past a trauma post.

The first time I ever watched homophobic bullying was in my pastor’s office. All the teens were waiting around a table for our youth pastor. There was one gay boy, a close friend of mine in a relatively small group. From the first week his family joined our church, an older girl in youth group announced to the rest of us that she couldn’t stand him because “he’s too happy and sings too much.” It was true. The new boy was the most cheerful, outgoing person I’d ever met. And he loves to sing.

The same girl gave a similar PSA behind my back when I was new. “We shouldn’t play with her because she’s weird and wears dress up clothes.” I was six. And it was true, I did wear a princess costume every day. Eventually I traded in my tutus for some looks that better reflected internalized misogyny and everyone figured out I’m funny as all shit and can get along with most anyone. I graduated from the bottom of the food chain.

So I shrugged off her hot take on my new friend. I don’t think she liked that her plans to cancel the new guy flopped. Because as we were waiting around that table she jumped up and grabbed his earlobe between her finger nails. She was super proud of her nails. They were long and scraggly like a cat and she was into filing them in public in case anyone felt too safe.

She dug her nails in on either side and no one said anything. You don’t stand up for a boy to a girl. I can’t remember if he tried to swat her off or just took it. It was only a minute but it was a damn long one. Blood started to bead around her nails. Then the door opened and she sat back down. Sunday school started.

Nothing I believed, no books, no paper, no concept of abomination could override what I’d just seen, the revulsion deep in my gut. It was more than rage. More than disgust. I still have no word for it. I was too young and the feelings that well up are still those of a thirteen year old.

It doesn’t matter what you call it. Anger like that is like walking around dead and suddenly finding your pulse because it’s roaring in your ears like a jackhammer.

I prayed to be like everyone else. To care about the same social issues in the same way. The only way I could make sense of my loneliness was that I was cursed in some way. If God loved me, he would make me content with the same values as my peers. But I had just seen someone harm someone else and not a single one of these fine, upstanding kids I’m supposed to make friends with say a damn thing.

A few years later, there was some kinda touchy-feeling Jesus shindig where everyone got real sugared up at night and had a big sing along with some college kids who were supposedly qualified to talk about the deep shit with us. If I mentioned their university you’d recognize it. Hint: assault cover ups

One guy, nineteen or so, must have gotten particularly inspired in the spirit because he starts preaching off-the-cuff about the sins of anorexia, binging, purging, and cutting. I inched backward. I tried hiding behind a football player; I was about half his width after all.

Peggy, what’s up with the bandaids?

I guess I tripped over a wall.

Hey I have a joke. How many Peggies can you fit in the shower? No one knows because—-

— I keep slipping down the drain. Heard that one.

Eat a fucking sandwich, you skinny cunt

The best part of the speech is it was addressed to us about the bad, vague other kids who barfed and otherwise screwed around. Those poor fuck-ups, insulting God’s creation by choosing to defile their bodies.

I couldn’t wait to get home and go for it, but felt a whole lot more like a compulsion than a choice.

I’ve heard this sermon twice, by the way. The second time, the pastor held up a paper crane and asked us to admire its delicacy and the skill it took to make it before shredding it up. Guess he worked hard on that metaphor.

That was me. A paper crane. Pure white, crafted precisely, folded up small. You could pinch my wings between your fingernails and pull them off. I wouldn’t bleed and you could vacuum me up. That was my power. The control in the fine lines and tight folds.

Anyway here I am squirming on my butt and waiting for my chance to burn off my two bites of pizza and Oreos. I’m pretty sure I’d made everyone laugh by scooting the cookies into my mouth from my forehead with no hands. See, everyone, I eat. Yeah, I was gonna have to get in some crunches tonight.

I wondered if I could chug enough lemon water to get diarrhea without being noticed, when somehow, we were looking at each other. The boy’s eyes were bright blue. Ice blue, like in cheesy books. Gay.

Skinny.

Leviticus. The apostle Paul.

Cutter.

It’s a powerful feeling, that two seconds of eye-contact that lets you know you aren’t crazy. That you aren’t the only one in the room who is angry. It is taking a hand to find it as wounded as yours.

Whatever is divine in this world, whatever is true and special and outside of ourselves, it is in the rage you can’t shake. If a voice is telling you that no one deserves to be treated this way, that you inherently do not deserve this, and you say shut up and shut up and shut up and it won’t

Shut up, shut up,

and your only answer is this is bullshit. You should get up and leave

Shut up

I said you are free to walk out,

I can’t,

well then I say you can. I say Truth never left you and you’re not dead.

disclaimer: I did not write this to shit on Christians (I am a Christian) or any tradition in general but the corruption that exists in specific systems

other disclaimer: the other kids in this story were literally also just kids, even the mean ones. I’m pretty sure all of them have grown into sensible adults I’d hang out with. I did not write this to shit on them either.

#personal post #so personal #lbtqa ally #queer affirming Christian #spirituality #religious trauma #church trauma #tw: ed mention #tw: evangelical crap #tw: bullying #tw: homophobia #eating disorder recovery #Peggy Sue for the win #feminism

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the-land-of-eternal-winter-novel · 1 year

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The Land of Eternal Winter - Political Compass 9×9 - ultimate character sheet + worldbuilding masterpost

Auth-Left

Including actual communists but generally just working class people and their adjacent labour unions, political parties etc

Center-Left

Including again, mostly working class people (regardless of political affiliation), people who are "progressive" by the standards of this society or otherwise people who view the revolutions in a positive light although they themselves would not join

Lib-left

Including actual anarchists as well as, again, people who would be considered "liberal" by the standards of that society, as well as those who prioritise their personal freedom etc

Auth-Center

Comprised of people who are power hungry for the most part, as well as others who are opposed to the current regime for whatever other reason

Centrist

People who genuinely want nothing to do with all of this, and are mostly concerned with their personal affairs, in this context used as synonym for apolitical

Lib-Center

People mostly concerned about personal freedom etc rather than any specific political affiliation, including various villagers (who would be conservative from a cultural lens)

Auth-Right

Including actual imperialists but mostly just traditionalists and the older generations of monarchists, people more concerned with justice and order than peace

Center-Right

Again, mostly monarchists and conservatives, more or less comprising the majority/ status quo of this society

Lib-right

People who value freedom, peace, etc more than order, justice etc, in the case of the monarchs: particularly lenient in their rule, this side also includes republicans (in the anti-monarchist/ presidency sense)

Edit:

Note:

The numerals indicate how proemiment a character actually is in the story

I = main cast

II = supporting character

III = episodic character

IV = background character

End of note

DISCLAIMER

I do not pretend this is a very accurate representation of an actual political compass, I mostly use it as a neat little character template because it's one I've been using for a long time

The society in which these characters live is largely very conservative, so even the left wingers are not as left as they would normally be, or the progressives as progressive as irl, etc. See: Overton window

I have indeed conflated right wing with conservative and left wing with progressive in some cases (otherwise the characters would not be so political, instead being in some way or another "against the grain" and thus falling in the category of "they care more about their personal freedoms"), and also the authority-liberty axis is used in a government sense with some (ostensibly political) characters, but in a personal (how lenient or inscrutable of a person they are etc) with less political characters.

I would also like to add that I tried my best with the names (personal names, surnames, toponyms etc), but I know I might have made some mistakes. If you know the language in which any of those names are written and it makes you cringe, feel free to critique them, but also offering some alternatives, because otherwise I cannot change them for the better. (On the other hand all country names are equally "cringe" translating literally to stuff like Frozenland, Mistland, Springland etc, so I'm not being disrespectful to any country in particular).

End of disclaimer

________

I worked about 2 months on this, with a total of 81 panels, and almost 100 characters illustrated

I personally am very satisfied with the end result and how far I've come both regarding my drawing and my writing skills. I really hope you guys enjoy it too and that the lore, presented in this format, will make you interested in my novel. Currently I've only written draft 1, but I'm working on wprldbuilding and outlining for draft 2, as illustrated (badum tss) above.

Thank you for reading!

#the land of eternal winter #my novel #brainstorming worldbuilding #worldbuilding #trailer #brainstorming for draft 2 #political compass

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iclimbtreestofeelalive · 9 months

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okay so. something i've been thinking about is the different attitudes towards carp in europe vs the us-- a lot of people in europe are confused as to why carp are considered "trash fish" in the us, since it's widely eaten and enjoyed elsewhere in the world. i thought i'd research it and break it down, because it's a genuinely interesting and multifaceted look at culture and food!

to begin with, we have to look at carp themselves. they're bottom-feeders, with downward-facing mouths primed to suck up mud, filter the edible parts, and spit it back out. this means very little, though-- i grew up eating fried catfish (an incredibly popular dish in the southern us), and those are also bottom-feeders. while it may have contributed to their reputation of dirty fish, bottom feeding alone isn't enough to doom carp to their maligned fate. what gives?

well, for starters, american rivers tend to be gross. depending on your area, they're filled with pollution, mercury, sewage, and fertilizer runoff. this gives the fish in them a distinctive strong taste-- hence why most american freshwater fish dishes are fried, then dipped in a strong sauce. the one time in my life that my grandmother made a catfish soup, it was so thoroughly disgusting i couldn't finish my bowl. gumbos and chowders are made from seafood-- freshwater us fish does not a good soup make. in some cases, the water toxicity levels are so high that the fish are classified as unsafe to eat.

so naturally, as someone who grew up fishing in tennessee lakes and rivers and eating the toxic beasts, my immediate instinct was to check where europeans source their carp. sure enough, the vast majority of european carp is farmed, not wild-caught! this means that it's safer, less pungent, and overall a better dining experience. not only that, but since carp are native to europe and asia, dishes that use them are more likely to work with the flavor, rather than against it.

(if i wanted to be able to be completely sure that american carp actually tastes worse, as i'm fairly sure it does, i would make some hapless european who loves me very much eat american carp. unfortunately, carp are in short supply where i live, and my darling european @emett-sidecast just flew home, so we'll have to wait for that particular experiment.)

all that to say-- i don't think americans are being needlessly picky! from river fish being genuinely toxic, to the differences between farmed and wild fish, i think there's a real possibility that american carp really does just taste worse. you also have to take into account that carp are invasive to the united states, which adds a layer of hostility which you wouldn't find otherwise. (again, catfish are functionally identical, but are 1. native to the us, and 2. fun to catch. please google catfish noodling.)

plus, in complete fairness, i think the people who call carp "trash fish" are more likely to be fishermen worried about resale value, corporations who legally can't farm invasive fish, or hobby fishermen who can afford to be picky. i have relatives who have eaten snake, squirrel brains, bull balls and my grandmother's cooking-- anyone who would eat those isn't likely to turn down a fish for being smelly.

thank you for reading, and please chime in if you have anything to say! this has been on my mind for months now, and anyone who is as insane about this as i am is fully welcome to join me in my scientific and sociological exploits.

#fish #carp #europe #america #sociology #ecology #I LOVE SCIENCE AND PEOPLE!!! AAAAAAA #i cant stop thinking about this #anyway. please no one eat fish from small southern rivers #especially if you haven't been acclimated from birth lmao #those fish will knock you out unless you fry them in butter or oil to take out the smell #long post #everyone pretty please look at my carp essay 🙏 i PROMISE i will be normal about it

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sweaterkittensahoy · 1 year

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Okay, so background on why I'm fucking tired and queer:

A couple of weeks ago, Candace "just as evangelical and awful as my brother but didn't make it my whole personality at 19" Cameron Bure announced that Great American Channel (GAC), which is like if Hallmark Channel spent even less money on movies and was very intentionally bigoted, would not make queer content because GAC "believes in traditional marriage." CCB is apparently the Chief Creative Officer at GAC, which tells you everything you need to know about exactly how hard they're ready to go for jerking off evangelicals and false "culture war" shit.

This led Neal Bledsoe, one of those NPC-generic good-looking white guys who makes bank as the romantic lead in Hallmark and GAC movies to cut his contract with GAC. His statement upon leaving was all about how his support for the queer community is unconditional.

Which. Dude. GAC didn't suddenly turn into evangelical fap fodder when CCB joined. She joined THEM because THEY HAVE ALWAYS BEEN LIKE THIS. There is no way you weren't at least somewhat aware of this when you signed a contract.

And, let me be clear, sometimes you gotta sign a contract as an actor you don't love because you gotta make rent. But if that's the case with Bledsoe, he didn't mention it in his inspo-porn statement about queer people being useful to him. He was utterly focused on how much he's learned, been helped by, and been supported by queer people. I want to believe he's sincere because it'd be nice to see it. But I am so fucking tired of queer people being treated as human fucking beings getting identified by straight people as, "OMG THE QUEERS HAVE ALWAYS BEEN SO NICE TO ME. I SUPPORT THEM."

Listen here, you cis-het white man stereotype: We don't exist to support you. We don't exist to piss off CCB and Kirk the banana handjob king. We exist because we EXIST, and THAT'S ALL THAT SHOULD FUCKING MATTER. We exist. We are human. We deserve dignity, rights, and some fucking representation. I don't need that from GAC. And I knew the moment Candance signed on that GAC wasn't gonna do shit I was interested in. I was ready to forget them as soon as I heard about them (which was literally when CCB switched from Hallmark, which has the nerve to occasionally do queer shit and also does interracial stories (I'm not not calling CCB racist. But evangelicals...).

I wasn't gonna suddenly flip to GAC because DJ from Full House was in something.

And now, Danica McKeller, aka Winnie, aka Math PhD is saying that Neal is "misinterpreting" what Candace Cameron Bure said.

Which is very, very annoying but not actually surprising. Because Danica signed with GAC either right before or right after CCB, and given the Cameron family, Pureflix-level notoriety for evangelicalism (I think Candace and Kirk have both been in at least one movie), so she can't pretend like she didn't fucking know what she was signing onto.

But honestly, a soft bigot (Danica) and a hard bigot (CCB) are less annoying to me right now than Bledsoe, who clearly wants to get applauded for supporting the queer community in this tough time when none of us are fucking surprised CCB and don't need his "they've always helped me, so I'm helping them" support.

Like, it's not about you or who supported you dude. And it shouldn't be. Either I'm a human being, have value, and deserve rights and respect, or I'm not. That's literally the line. That's fucking it.

#gac #candace cameron bure #neal bledsoe #danica mckeller #oh but maybe he really meant well #well he had a few days to write the fucking statement #and what we got was...that #hopefully he learns from this and doesn't use us as clout points again #but for now fuck that guy #queer shit #lgbtqia+ issues #queer issues

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