#THANK YOU anon you are absolutely amazing thanks for sharing your analysis!

[hitsuzenhusbands]

hey! i hope you're having a good day! i just read your (amazing!) asoue fic "ashes to ashes," and i was fascinated by the way you portrayed kit and olaf. i thought i'd send this ask because i'd really love to hear more of your thoughts on their dynamic if you feel like sharing? but if you don't feel like expanding on it, i totally understand! thank you so much for sharing your beautiful work on ao3!

OHH anon you are so kind...i apologize for being so extremely late but i just finished writing a little analysis so i figured now's about the right time to write a semi-legible response. might have been scary and incomprehensible otherwise. but i am finally here to scream and cry and thank you so desperately because im SO happy you enjoyed them AND decided to ask for more info! <3

to begin, i'd be absolutely inconsolable if i didn't point you towards @virginian-wolfsnake's fic the eye of the storm, probably one of my fave k&o fics of all time that delves into the meat of their relationship through the years from the perspective of kit. they're young and still excited by missions and flirty and tender and genuine, and, in time, when the rest of their world collapses, so do they--messy and tense and so wonderfully realistic you have to read it and then read it again. honestly, if you don't want to read the rest of this but still want an answer, just read that. but also read it anyway

and now i have to ask you to forgive me...i have not read the books in a very long time and while i know the netflix series (in comparison) is bad and awful and terrible, i have watched it a million times. so if i'm wrong on anything. that's why.

to begin, the version of olaf i depicted in my fic is at the height of his...how do you say...pathetic misery. not including the spiral he has during the series. to me, the death of his parents are the beginning of his downfall into something-like-insanity, but he's still (and will continue to be) recognizably himself, if that makes sense. he's always been messy and emotional and dramatic (see the line: "...Kit has seen him in worse states and with a much better view..."), but only now does he reveal not a different side of himself per se, but a different angle of one that already existed.

im a fervent believer that olaf's always been a little self destructive and a lot crazy. hes spent the greater half of his life coming to terms with the fact that he is intrinsically not as noble as the rest of vfd--hes impulsive and obnoxious and self-obsessed, barely even literate at times--and it takes a special kind of guy to carve the insignia of the organization full of people he despises into his own front door. still, his parents' death was a catalyst, meaning he wasn't entirely opposed to vfd beforehand. he probably liked the missions and the secrecy and the dramatics, obviously the disguises and everything, but i think before the night at the opera it was really just a source of fun for him. he never truly grasped the reality of it, the nature of his actions and the weight of his involvement. whether that was out of naivety or pure neglect of the facts is up for debate. (there's a little bit of this in the shattering of thalia and melpomene if that interests you at all, beloved anon. see the line: "...[Esme] could never compare to the extent to which [Olaf] removes himself from everyone else entirely. How he spends so much time worrying about himself he almost forgets to worry about himself...Esme could never truly get lost in her own greatness. Could never turn a blind eye to the inner workings of V.F.D.")

kit, on the other hand, definitely did. serving as a volunteer was her purpose, the sole thing she had to cling to. she dedicated her life to it, making conscious decisions to go against her moral code in the hope that it all truly was for a greater good. i think, at times, she could fall into her own little fits of self-destruction, putting vfd above herself entirely (see the line: "This wouldn’t be the first time she’d done something she would never truly volunteer for...he’d still spent year after year watching her run off...to do something she could never speak of." "...she still returned with clenched teeth and knit eyebrows, as though she had no choice in the matter at all.")

to avoid any more convolution, in my mind it goes something like this: both are volunteers--olaf born and raised (along with beatrice), kit torn from her family and thrust into the thick of it so early on its all she knows. they grow up, probably-definitely know each other but dont know each other until, say, late teens-early twenties?

up until then, they've been everything previously described, but intermingling with one another changes this. olaf's easygoing approach rubs off on kit, partly because she finds more joy in his company than in missions, partly because he makes every attempt to keep her from leaving. i like to think she tries to keep his relatively flimsy moral code in check, or at the very least restrain his temper to the best of her abilities.

to me, they're a simultaneously great and terrible couple. at their best, they counteract each other in a positive way as described above and serve as a welcome distraction from the realities of a crumbling vfd, a little island of tenderness and domesticity in the ocean of turmoil that surrounds them.

and at their worst, their personalities combat so violently it's hard to see how they ever could have been together. olaf deals out the worst of it, prone to neglect and self-isolation, a deeply inset refusal to discuss anything with her, an inclination towards firestarting and an increasingly poor reputation with everyone kit knows. then again, kit isn't free of blame (if you can call it that), she's just as opposed to talking anything out as he is, and her isolation takes on the shape of running off to do as many missions as as she can before she's dead on her feet. she's pulled in different directions--a well-instilled hatred towards firestarers, only further influenced by whatever rumours olaf's growing list of enemies supplies her, versus her love for him, her knowledge of who he really is, a concept that is often tested. (see the line: "He’s reminded of a fight they once had, about something or other, that ended in her angry admission that it was easier to be upset with him when he wasn’t nearby.") 

anyway, the idea is they grow further and further apart both ideologically and physically/relationship-wise until the opera night and the crash following that (see: the whole fic!) and from then on i think they fall into something like an evil situationship. they barely see each other, complete opposite sides of the schism. i say situationship because i think when they do see each other (on missions, at events/in public, in private, etc.) it is just a terrible experience no matter what. they're both torn between hating the other for what they know about them/what they did (i like to think olaf finds out about kit supplying the darts) and reminiscing/yearning for what they once had.

for the sake of this i wont give my thoughts on whose baby kit has because that's a whole other thing (not really. its just more of a fun hc i think about on occasion as opposed to something concrete in canon or even my version of canon) but their scene in the end does make me insane. its a culmination of all the time spent wishing what happened didnt happen, almost as though theyre seeing each other for the first time once again, perhaps not blind to the past but looking away for (on olafs part) one final moment of normalcy.

i hope thats what you were looking for to any degree, anon. im a little rusty on my lore but they matter to me soo much. if i have to leave this on anything, its go read eye of the storm. kitlaf fic of all time.

#im so sorry this took approximately one million years #i hope it suffices anon... #also i hope its ok to tag u out of the blue my wonderful mutual #that fic is so good....makes me crazy everytime i think abt it #asoue #a series of unfortunate events #count olaf #kit snicket #kitlaf #answered asks #analysis #fic posting

[thesherrinfordfacility]

yikes. people are so freaking awful and immature sometimes. sorry that happened and don't let that deter you from sharing all your thoughts and insights. even if people disagree with it there's something called etiquette

i love it when people disagree with me!!! that's the thing - when someone comes to me with a counterpoint or alternative perspective on a line/scene/action, i do genuinely take a second to see if i can interpret it the same way? and there have been multiple times where it's happened!!! christ, going back through my old metas, my opinion and analysis has changed so much, because of amazing and intelligent people talking to me about their thoughts, and are such good ones that it alters my way of thinking!!!

idk why the lack of etiquette still continues to surprise me, it absolutely shouldn't and i need to stop being so naive about it. unfortunately for me, a couple of the blogs on that post are ones that post their own metas that i genuinely love and think are great works - and yet, if i don't agree with them, i will either keep it to myself, talk about it privately, or on a very rare occasion rb with what i hope is a polite argument. my issue is that i expect others to have the self level of awareness or niceness, or even plain politeness, and that's my failing. i was originally upset about it, then angry, and now it's just funny to me.

thank you for your message, anon, it's very kind of you and i really appreciate it. i had about three other things saved in the drafts that i wanted to post, and a few asks in the inbox talking about other really cool things, but this whole thing has now made me so self-conscious that im reluctant to even consider posting? so your encouragement is very welcome, even if it might take a few days for me to feel brave enough to do it. thanks again💕

#good omens #ask

[ryuichirou]

Would you mind explaining what draws you to suice? This is my first time seeing the ship and I’m curious what it was that made them stand out to you. Also your art is absolutely gorgeous<3

Anon, this is an amazing question, thank you for letting us rant about them! Haha

And thank you for your kind words; I’m very glad you like my art qwq

So, SuIce. I think we started shipping them in 2016. It was probably the last time we rewatched the anime and re-read some of the strips. We liked Nordics even before and somewhat shipped DenNor, but other ships didn’t really click with us back then, even though we enjoyed every character separately (especially Iceland). And then we watched the Iceland Birthday episode and noticed that Sweden and Iceland, surprisingly, seemed to share quite a cute yet subtle little bond??

As Iceland watches other Nordics (and Estonia), being concerned about what they’re up to, Sweden notices it and makes sure Iceland is alright. And then Iceland decides to share his concerns with Sweden and ask him about what’s going on. It seems like it’s not the first and last time this happened; in general, I feel like Ice’s go-to is to talk to Sweden whenever he feels like something is off or others are acting weird, or whenever he needs reassurance. As it turns out, they share these tiny dialogues quite regularly by this point.

*nod*

“I’m glad at least you’re taking this seriously” he says lol

Iceland really likes Sweden. He’s a big reliable adult figure in his life, someone Iceland feels very comfortable with and someone who makes it easier for him to hang out with others. Like that one guy at the party you can actually chat with, or nod to each other in silence. Granted, Iceland does feel kind of distant from all the Nordics (even his brother), and Sweden isn’t an exception, but it’s like Sweden gets him in ways others don’t, at least in Iceland’s eyes.

So it’s very fun to imagine mysterious and secretive Iceland crushing super hard on him and being too shy to approach him properly: what if he makes a fool out of himself, what if Sweden only sees him as a child, what if Sweden thinks he’s cringe (the scariest thought tbh)? And yet he can’t help but feel hopelessly infatuated whenever he’s around him.

And the thing is, romantically or not, Sweden really likes Iceland too and cares about him a lot. For some reason, he pays very close attention to him and makes sure he’s in a good mood. He even tells others not to push him into doing things he doesn’t want to.

And I feel like this attention only makes Iceland’s crush stronger, thank you very much for your mixed messages, Sweden.

Their chemistry is so apparent that even freaking Denmark acknowledges it and teases Iceland about how docile and nice he is whenever Sweden is talking to him, in contrast to being aloof and unenthusiastic with the rest of the Nordics. And look at Iceland, glancing at Sweden and mumbling something about Denmark not being as composed as Sweden. Like we said, he likes his big stoic mature man lol

On a more spicy note, back in 2018 we started joking about Iceland always being stuck with tall muscular older men for some reason (Sweden, Turkey + Russia is also mentioned in his old profile), so we also like to think he has a type lol, and of course Sweden fits his type perfectly. Will Indonesia join their little squad? I surely hope so lmao

Oh, and a little bonus, we really really really love that Iceland calls Sweden “Svi”. Finland calls him “Su-san”, others just call him Sweden(Sverige), and for Iceland he’s just… Svi. This is so adorable. It sounds really sweet.

Oof, it’s been a while since we’ve written such a long analysis-type reply, thank you for reading if you’ve read this far. As you can see, we’re quite passionate about these two haha

(Every single strip/frame is from hetascanlations, and we thank them earnestly for their work  )

#replies #suice

[aspoonofsugar]

Hello!!!! Anon who asked about your process here!! Oh my god. Oh my god. This is literally nothing short of being enlightened. I’m really so grateful you took so much time to help others by sharing what you know. It’s really just so generous of you- years maybe, of just. So much experience and knowledge. Absolutely speechless with how much you shared. It was not confusing, not even one bit. I really feel so lucky to be able to learn directly from who I look up to 😭 It’s really a blessing one can never come by. Your kindness and generosity to growing artists is. Baffling 🫂🫂🫂🫂 thank you so much!!!!!!!! do you mind also sharing how you started, or what made you start?? I’m kind of really curious about what road you took I guess that lead you to discover so much about. Everything you know now 😭 honestly wait going off track- personally speaking taking such a close look and picking apart something you love is such an awesome thing. The fact that you’re curious about impact, impression and meaning of a work to such an extent in which you analyze it, break it down, by observing it so compassionately- i really feel like you’re doing the artists good. To me there’s little else that conveys ‘this is meaningful. This is so cool to me!’ to such an extent, so ridiculously clearly and passionately. If I were one of the artists you’d had written for, I would be ecstatic to see someone so compassionate and obsessed(?exaggerating) with my work and the meaning of/behind it. Your passion and love towards your subjects is ridiculous evident in your work, and I just hope you know that it’s. It’s really amazing, what you’re doing. How clearly it means something to you. As an artist, I can’t help but feel excited just for whoever artist you wrote an analysis for.

once again oh my godddddd thank you so so so ridiculously much for your time attention and support its actually so much more than I could ever ask for!!!!!!! I will pay you back with being so awesome and promising I’ll make good use of all the everything!! The everything!!!!! I’m so sorry oh my gosh too excited after reading your reply

HI!! writing process anon here!! what i meant to say in my last ask was that your love and compassion shows through very clearly in your analysis’!!!!! Your blatant appreciation through meticulous efforts in breaking down meaning and what it entails/entailed shine through in everything you write. Thank you so much for all you do!!!!

Hello anon!

Awwww thank you so much for your nice words, they really mean a lot! And I am happy my answer was useful <3

As for how I started... I was Meta Anon in @hambliet's askbox!

I started by reading analyses here on tumbrl and before making a blog of my own I was an anon sharing my thoughts in people's inboxes. Hamliet realized it was the same person sending her meta-thoughts and after some time I made my own blog and here I am <3

Thank you for passing by and I hope you have fun analyzing stories, as much as I do! It really is an activity that brings me joy!

#anonymous #meta writing #writing #asksfullofsugar #sweet anon

[kiisaes]

Hey! So I read your post about my hero academia, the one where you talked about having a weird fatherly connections towards it and I wanted to ask you about what aspects you don’t like about the series? I share a lot of your sentiments but I do think it’s probably more than mid series? A lot of the details and writing I like and I think is considerable better than other shounen mangas. Anyways sorry for rambling. I just wanted to know what aspects you liked on the series and the ones you didn’t like.

Also complete side note: I absolutely love you’re art it’s so beautiful you’re and really skilled drawer!

sure! and thank u anon!

i want to preface this by saying that everything here is my opinion. media analysis is inherently subjective and something i think is bad might be something you think is good. considering how mha is not a shounen that's universally applauded for any or all of its writing choices, it's expected that you and i may perceive this content differently. doesn't mean i'm right and you're wrong and vice versa, it's just a different individual take on the source content.

also, even though i think mha is "mid to mid-good" (as quoted from my textpost) i don't use "mid" as either an insult or in a "it's so average it's bad" way. i know that word has been fucked over bc ppl automatically assume that something being mid means something is bad or bland or boring. it's a middle of the road series with a good share of flaws and strengths, and it doesn't particularly stand out as anything incredibly amazing or awful. just an average to decently good story, and its level of quality fluctuates throughout its run.

at the end of the day, i do like mha. despite what i think of it, it's a series i hold close to my heart and one i can enjoy even without a critical eye. if i didn't, i wouldn't have been making content for it for 2, almost 3 consistent years.

anyway, stuff i like + stuff i don't like under the cut: (warning: VERY LONG)

mha stuff i do like:

deku. he is my little boy

for the most part, horikoshi's character writing is one of his strongest abilities. characters like bakugou, shigaraki, and dabi (and honestly the todoroki family as a unit) are some of the most compelling characters in a story like this. they're allowed to be complex, dynamic and a blend of virtuous and damning traits. they match the overall themes of mha, which is that the sheer concept of "good vs evil" is surface level at best, and that placing people into strict boxes blocks them from everything else that they are. basically a complete "fuck you" to viewers who must condemn a morally grey hero/villain, for example. even less morally grey characters like ochako (imo) are still fun twists and explorations on their given character stereotypes. however i'm obligated to say "for the most part" because hori's superb character writing only matters when he gives those characters time to breathe and actually exist. i'll get into this more later

horikoshi's art is fantastic and undoubtedly his greatest attribute as a mangaka. i firmly believe that, as far as shounen art goes, there aren't any that can rival mha that are also at its global reach. there's never a single moment where i read a chapter and go "wow that art wasn't incredible" because that's not possible. he utilizes his art knowledge so effortlessly and brings out so much in every panel he makes. the manga art never feels dull. i'm so insanely jealous and in awe of him. i guess i could be biased when making this point but i find it hard to genuinely hate his art. it's so polished every time

this is a smaller point that adds to the last one but i do appreciate how he draws women. not when he's using them for uncomfortable gags, but just in general. there's like, actual meat on their bones. they have realistic body proportions (for his style). many of the women are "chubbier" than other shounen women, and a good amount of them are buff as FUCK. it feels like hori puts the same amount of effort into drawing his female characters as he does his male characters, even if he might not dignify that writing-wise

as a fellow comic artist, i absolutely love his understanding of comic language. it's small details like his onomatopoeia reminiscent of western superhero comics that really tie the presentation together. each panel is full of life, with characters and backgrounds working together in the most effective ways. i can't remember what tumblr textpost brought this up, but he also loves playing around with panel borders. he spices them up by using different subjects or objects to split up panels. and this was more of a strength earlier in the series imo, but his pacing was also pretty quick and resourceful. it shows to me that he truly loves creating manga and knows when it's the right time to visually deviate from the norm. again, i'm truly envious of how he can do this. i only hope to reach his level someday ...

this is definitely a biased point, but some of the series' arcs/storylines are some of my favorite ones in fiction. these include the tournament arc, the kamino rescue arc, the overhaul arc, twice's death, and anything relating to the todoroki family. obviously i'm only listing a handful of examples here because i think nearly every arc has its good moments that i can comment on. but when i think of good mha storylines, i think of these first

i also think that mha as a whole is a fun series that knows how to laugh at itself. there's nothing more awkward than a story that takes itself way too seriously, but the content itself is poorly written or not interesting. thankfully, horikoshi doesn't really fall into this issue

there are canon lgbt characters in this series. even if that's kind of a low bar atp (considering how only 1 out of the 3 play a consistently important role), a win is a win is a win. especially in mainstream shounen, beggars can't exactly be choosers.

mha is a story about systemic societal injustice, which is a lofty concept to tackle. thankfully the story is about powers being the norm so the whole "i'm born better than you because i have abilities" is less of a status quo rejection and more of a status quo enabler. as a story concept, it's a good basis, doesn't seem too hard to comprehend, and opens the door for nuanced storytelling and discussion. i think hori does this well at the start of the series. but as the story goes on... uhhh. i'll talk about it.

mha stuff i don't like:

man do these women have basically nothing interesting to do. i complimented how they're drawn earlier, but with the exception of a few notable ones, a lot of their characters pale in comparison to the men. it's even sadder considering that the amount of women in mha is significantly lesser than, so 5 important female characters is like, 1/4 of the female cast. 5 important male characters is like, 1/12 of the male cast. idk i didn't count the amount of characters in this series but it sincerely feels this way, especially if you remember that there are definitely more than 5 important male characters at any moment throughout this series. and when female characters do have their time to shine, there's a 50/50 chance that they die, get gravely injured, or lose limbs. which normally isn't an issue in a battle shounen like mha, but out of the important character deaths in this series, a fair amount of them are women. midnight, magne, and star and stripe have pretty anticlimactic deaths too, to add insult to injury. lady nagant talked her shit then exploded. she's still alive but like ... what? did these characters have to be treated this way? i can't really think of any important male characters who get introduced then axed from the story like this, except for maybe stain (though he's a far more important character narratively). the reason why i bring up this really lengthy point is not because i think horikoshi is actively misogynistic. i just think he falls into the trap that many shounen mangakas face, which is that male characters are more interesting to a male dominated audience. hence, female characters usually get thrown to the side. there are some important women in mha that stand toe to toe with male characters, like toga and ochako, and there are definitely certified girlbosses like mirko and yaoyorozu. but god do i wish i could add more women to this list without having to think really really hard.

and to add onto the previous, shallow, unimportant characters only gain backstories when the narrative demands for it. horikoshi used to write characters revealing their intentions and history in relatively natural ways, like with ochako and her goal to become a hero for money. it kind of came out of nowhere, but it's a valid conversation a teenager would have with other teenagers. in context, it was revealed normally. i'm not sure when these reveals turned forced, but i remember seeing kirishima's backstory and being like "well .. would this have ever been told to us if kirishima wasn't a main character in this arc?" this isn't against kirishima's character; i love the guy and i think his history was short but contextualized his personality really well. but with the recent shoji backstory reveal i could only think, "wow. horikoshi must be really glad he made a mutant character to project this theme onto, huh." it didn't feel like shoji was ever meant to have a backstory — not to mention a very depressing one — but he got one this late in the series run because it was convenient for the plot. perhaps i'm a cynic and this isn't an issue for others, idk. that being said, i think characters like shoji and even star and stripe and lady nagant could have benefited from more natural character developments, maybe with more time given so it doesn't feel like a weirdly convenient reveal.

i just really fucking wish mineta would die already. like get kicked into the sun or blown up with TNT or run over by a car or something. he's less of an openly creepy loser than he was in the beginning of the series, but i'm sure that's because he literally doesn't have the luxury to be creepy at the moment. he's one of the least appealing gag characters that never grows and changes as a person. and he got a backstory before kaminari. can you fucking believe this shit? why does horikoshi keep entertaining this bullshittery— oh yeah. i just remembered that the girls were perved on quite a bit in this series, which wasn't funny and moreso uncomfortable for a lot of readers. like, i know it's shounen, it's animanga, fanservice is kind of the unfortunate norm. but by god, do we need a series poster child for pervy, male-gaze behavior?

i commented earlier about mha's themes and that i think, at least at the start, hori had a good grasp of what he was writing. framing society's systemic flaws and failures in a wacky superheroes vs villains story is not only clever, but makes this actually serious topic accessible to those who might think social-cultural politics are too intimidating. he sets this up starting from deku and bakugou (oppressed and privileged), then adds onto it with stain (heroes who retain the status quo by seeking money and status are not true heroes, because they don't help those in need). shigaraki is thrown into the mix along the way (society fucks over the underprivileged, even those who want to do good, which breeds more villains and in the real world, more criminals) and his little league of villains all have their own stories (spinner: those who don't look like the masses are cast aside, harassed and villainized; dabi: if you don't live up to cruel expectations established by society and parroted by those in your life, you might as well be worthless; toga: any unconventional worldviews and actions are deemed scary and evil; magne: trying to conform to a rigid society as a queer person is fucking hard, man). there's also endeavor (even though you're in a position of power and respect, it doesn't automatically make you a good person). these are all GREAT, and are super compelling set-ups for mha's overall themes: that society should change somewhat, villains are a product of this flawed system, there aren't fully good people nor fully bad people, rehabilitation/growth is good, and true heroes aren't identified by title, but by actions.

these themes are quite apparent throughout mha's entire run. but i feel like the further it goes, the less horikoshi knows how to verbalize them. the latest mini arc dealt with spinner vs shoji in a strangely awkward clash of ideals. spinner is seen as a martyr who really just wants mutants to be accepted into society, and his status rallies up those who have also been hurt. shoji retaliates by... telling them to stop? by saying this isn't the right way? because he was fortunate enough to be in this position, he suddenly has the authority to tell those like him to find a better way to get their voices heard? what, should they all just become heroes? haven't we established that the society they all belong in is fucked up, and that drastic change must be made? i understand what horikoshi is trying to say but it's... off. like the point is there, but the execution is clumsy. shoji even says something like spinner's revolution setting them back 30 years, which is so fucking bizarre to say, and would certainly raise eyebrows in the real world. it sounds like villains can express their grievances with society but they can't dare revolutionize. otherwise, they'll be silenced/ignored again. it's the whole "violence breeds more violence" belief, but there's more to that that should be explored. man, i dunno.

i'm harping on this one story instance but recent mha is riddled with well-meaning but clumsy storytelling like this. and since the narrative relies on these complex, nuanced themes, it's jarring when the nuance falls through. if mha is about breaking harmful norms, why do they still dictate the execution? hori did it so right with deku and bakugou, their relationship being a definite high in the series. but i truly don't how he'll treat the villains at the end of this arc

ok tumblr's telling me to shut up anyway these are my thoughts. again, even though i've rambled so much about my dislikes, i think mha is still a fun and enjoyable series. it misses the point sometimes, but it doesn't detract from its successes. either way my opinions should not rule over how you consume the series. it's always important to form your own opinions!!!

#asks for becki #SORRY FOR THE LONG LONG LONG POST #long post #i love hearing the sound of my voice so much i end up saying nothing of value #hope ppl understand my pov. it's also ok if u don't. peace and love #bnha #mha #becki rambles about stuff

[mcgnussen]

hi to all my followers (all 142 of you now which is wild!) and k-mag tag lurkers 👋

so we have reached the end of the 2022 season, it has been a true rollercoaster for us k-mag fans! from the lows of meatball flags to the highs of pole positions (!!!) and battling with mercedes at the beginning of the season. during december, i will make a post to recap kev’s whole season as best i can remember. if you want to contribute to this, you can send me asks or submit posts about what you remember from kevin during particular races, the good and the bad. and if you do send me a few asks then please be sure to give me a name or send non-anon asks from your blog, so i can thank you for your contribution and credit you properly! of course, you can still send me anons if you prefer.

i will remain active on this blog and give you all the kevin updates i can get my hands on - particularly when it comes to gulf 12 hours! i am very excited to see kevin and jan racing together again. but after that, the blog might get a bit slow. the problem is that when kevin is not racing then his social media presence basically dies, so sadly we probably will not be hearing a lot from him until the start of the 2023 season. i will randomly reblog some things from this season tho, so kev will hopefully stay on your dash.

however, i have decided to do two new things during the off season. kevin has done two 1-hour interviews during this season, and will soon do a third, so i will be signing up for danish viaplay to watch those and make posts about the best bits from each interview. they are all in danish, so sadly i cannot just record them and share them with you all. besides that, i will also be watching a few of his old races, the best ones, and do a recap of them because i will miss f1 and watching old races back makes me happy. i might also do an in-depth analysis of his pole position from brasil. the bits from the long interviews and the race recaps will be tagged with #themagnussencorner. and if you end up missing kev content, i recommend you go through that tag and read some of my old posts! 

thank you all for all the reblogs, questions, comments and general support you have all given me this season. it has been absolutely amazing. i genuinely just made this blog so i could post random kev things, and i thought maybe i’d find a couple of other kevin fans, but i’ve found so many more than i thought possible! back in the day, it could sometimes feel quite lonely to be a k-mag stan, so i’m pleased to find so many of you. i think we have a nice lil community on here and it’s a pleasure to share the space with you all, new and old kev fans alike ❤️

#kevin magnussen

[songbird-sunrise]

Ooc: Hmm you don’t have to answer this publicly it can just sit in your ask box or something else I don’t mind.

I havent actually been following songbird!wilbur for a significant amount of time, really, the impact was being friends and sometimes friends of friends of people who were running the anonverse and bedrock verse. I feel like I’m overstating my connection, I’m often just following bloggers who are friends with the rp ers, and they are some of the most passionate people they’re totally insane and I love being witness to it

hell, I only started following a couple of months ago, and I didn’t even see whatever meat of conflict that has happened. I’ve just watched it unfold on my dash whatever’s been happening. I don’t think I’ve even sent in an ask.

so that’s to say, I have such a lack of connection to this story, no complex history, no deep understanding, which makes it so much more impressive that the little parts I’ve seen are so emotionally beautiful to me. Even just like the blog header. I’ve been hearing about this story for so long that part of it is the thrill when I do figure out something that’s happened

but more of it? Maybe even most of it? Is because of how much dedication and soul has gone into this story. There is a reason that so many people are passionate, there is a reason that some days I see more fanart of songbird on the dash than like cwjlbur or ccwilbur combined. Because you have made something exquisite with this story and what an honour right? To bear witness to it, even this late, even this far behind.

I think the message, the little scraps of it that my colander brain (system lol) can pick up and I think the message of that. Getting better. Finding community and trust. Finding yourself. I think it’s wonderful.

(What’s embarrassing is that i am for all intents and purposes a fake fan </3 not caught up on any lore I just stare at your header and feel Emotions, so all of this could be entirely 10000% wrong which is why it’s a bit of a like… maybe don’t publish it but perhaps I deserve public punishment for being a clown on anon and sharing emotions)

so yeah uhh you’re amazing I love your rp character and I hope to one day be one of the people posting about them when a particularly cool thing happens. I thank you and applaud you for the amount of work that you have put into this story. Good job. Happy new year to you and happy new year to songbird!wilbur too.

what an exquisite thing I get to see, what could I feel other than honour.

-rib

OOC: Ohhhh my god. oh wow. oh holy shit. this is like the sweetest thing I've ever gotten wtf

usually I don't get very sentimental on here ooc but hey. I'll do it for today

it's been a bit rough writing on songbird-sunrise lately. Nothing I write feels good, and it all feels like such a chore most days. But hearing that you, someone who only recently got involved, loves this silly little character I've made so much absolutely warms my heart. It reminds me of why I do this in the first place

songbird-sunrise is, in a way, my love letter to the dreamsmp and c!wilbur. I know you said your analysis on songbird's themes was probably wrong, but you're actually completely right. We want to show the messy, complicated, hard, and beautiful parts of healing and finding yourself. And the fact that it's conveyed to you without even seeing everything is just. fucking amazing. it's nice to have a direct reminder that I'm actually good at what I love to do for lack of better words

all this to say, thank you. thank you for sending this ask, and thank all of you out there. Whether you're an old fan, a new fan, someone who sends a lot of asks, someone who likes to lurk, someone who makes art, analyses, all of you. thank you, and I promise that there are still some big things planned. The journey of healing is never over, and really, songbird!Wilbur is just beginning :)

-holly and wilbur

#ooc #save

[ahundredtimesover]

This is gonna be a bit long.. So actually this is my friend's assumption, I shared your fics to her a long time ago and she told me "I think Mimi was/is a Psychology student" (my friend is a psy student).

She told me that in Inevitable, Jungwon's type of toys and the way he communicates is in accordance to his developmental stages. You wrote perfectly how JK's relationship with his dad contributed a lot to how JK treated Jungwon, how environmental factors (Tae, Namjoon) affects how OC raised and molded Jungwon's personality. OC's grieving process is clear and you wrote well about how a healthy relationship dynamic works.

She also said that you might've used Sternberg's Triangular Theory in Please Love Me, but you simplified it into trust, love and respect. You also described JK's frustration and guilt and how he coped with them very clearly.

There were a lot more of her analysis and those were just some of them. She said that if she were your professor she would give you an A+ 😂😂

Anyway, both of us read a lot of JK fanfic but you're still our favorite author 💕 But the question remains:  Were you or were you not majored in Psychology?? 😂

OMGGG ANON?? Definitely one of my fave asks ever 🥹🥹 I am honored to be hypothetically given an A+ from your friend! And I absolutely get giddy when readers give me their analyses of the stories huhu and those of your friend’s are A+ 😉 but to answer your question…. No, I’m not a psych major. I wish I was! I considered shifting in college and even taking it for post-grad but I’m actually a political science major; took masters in global politics, too 😅

I work in a child welfare NGO though, and we run parenting programs and learn about developmental stages of children so much of how I wrote Jungwon, including healthy dynamics between parents and those around a child, are based on what I learned from work. 😊 As for PLM, I’ve never actually heard of Sternberg’s Triangular Theory… I just based the ideas off having a boyfriend for 10 years 🙈🙈

But Omg this is amazing! Thank you so much for dropping by and analyzing my stories! I’m so happy you do that bc I do, too hehe would love to hear what those other analyses are someday 😉🥰🥰

Send an ask about an assumption you have of me and I’ll tell you if it’s true or false!

#mimianswers #mimi things #💌

[metvmorqhoses]

Sure your villains analysis are genius, but that one thing you wrote about the differences between book and show Darkling still haunts me to this day. I keep coming back to it and it’s just so amazing

The mere fact someone appreciates it this much is the absolute best reward, anon.

I’m beyond glad to see people sharing my passions and visions. Thank you so much for taking the time to send me such a darling message.

#the darkling #darklina #shadow and bone #the grisha trilogy #anon #asks/replies #lovely ppl #villains

[cat-mentality]

YOUR WRITINGGGG honestly that's part of why I would love this arc!! The fics, the arc, the character analyses would go so hard!! Tbh that's one element that I miss from purgatory, the outpouring of creative works from the fandom during that time was absolutely amazing 🔥

And I agree, the fact that they have two canon lives is imo what would make this arc possible, getting rid of an egg completely would be way too heartbreaking and I doubt it would be allowed (thank god) but an egg losing one canon life isn't too out there I think.

I would love to see how it would shake up relationships on the island, the relationships you mentioned plus the potential for conflict between the parents that have shared custody of one egg (richas's parents especially, i can definitely see them disagreeing with each other). And maybe this would force more interactions between ccs so that they coordinate being on the server together, I miss that!!

And speaking of forever I've heard theories of him potentially planning a canon death... 👀

Thank you anon ❤️

Yes!!!! Omg some of the best pieces of character analysis and just overall writing that came from Purgatory just the amount of angst the Bolas?!?! Mains managed to create..... Honestly take me back, I did enjoy the event a lot especially by how creative the fandom got (and the ability to block people helps immensely!), I genuinely enjoy when big plots like this happen (Happy pills was so fucking good too, Forever's lore go HARD)

I love the little munchkins too, it would be different if the egg could actually die (I wouldn't exactly be opposed to it but lmao I would be a huge ass hypocrite and hope it would be the eggs I care less about 😭) but yeah, an egg death will be super fucking sad and we will probably cry but story wise it will be perfect to showcase how dangerous this threat truly is without taking away one of the kids from us.

I'm really curious about who exactly could be the chosen kid. Like most of them make sense in their own ways don't they? Like i think that if he does kill an egg it will be a deliberate choice, he will either pick one or make them choose among themselves and I feel that whoever dies will affect A LOT in how things will play out and how they will deal with the whole possession thing

Like killing Chayenne will not have the same effect as killing Sunny, since Philza and Tubbo have drastically different approaches to this situation.

I saw some theories about that too and just...... Becoming president was really the worst thing that ever happened to Forever wasn't it? 😭

#i could go on and on about which child he would pick and why #i hope he goes down this path #it's time we get some actual action here folks #anon ask

[musicrunsthroughmysoul]

Hiii, sorry I couldn't let you know how much I appreciate that you took your time with writing that amazing analysis of "We Were All Wounded at Wounded Knee" sooner, but better late than never I guess 😅

I just wanted to thank you for sharing it with us 💙 It was so informative and great. Again, thank you so much 💙 I hope everything is going great for you btw!

Hi, no worries - I understand!

💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💓💓💓💓 Thank you so much for letting me know your thoughts on it! I'm so glad you found it informative - I was hoping for that, first and foremost! :')

You're so welcome - it was an absolute pleasure and an honor, honestly, to write it, because I fucking love Redbone and they do not get enough credit for what they contributed to music, particularly rock music (classic rock, to be more specific). And they especially are not considered enough, music-wise, when it comes to their material that wasn't just, like, pop, or the more fluffy stuff that didn't really coalesce with their album themes (unfortunately, I'm eyeing Wovoka as such an album in particular, although I would 100% say it's not their fault that WWAWAWK was left off, leaving the album's primary themes pretty irrelevant - but even with that song on that album, I'd say more than a few others were like...why is this song on here? It makes no sense, which I would suggest that the band had at least some control over regarding the rest of the tracklisting). Anyway, I would love to write about them again at some point, and I'll make sure to write down/record my thoughts for any new essay(s) about them as they come to me, so I hope you'll come back to find it, eventually, when I write and post it! Asking me directly (like this - via an ask, or message) to write about them or an album or song works wonders for my motivation, though, because then I know that there's someone out there who genuinely wants to read my thoughts rather than me just writing for myself (even though that's always part of the equation, too, but I do that most of the time. LOL) and posting it into the void because, meh, maybe someone eventually will want to read it or maybe not.

Anyway, thank you so much! I hope you're doing well, yourself, and you're always welcome to anon me again with questions or if you just want to talk about music - I would absolutely love that, either one! :'D (Which reminds me that I should respond to and post some of your previous asks, too, and if you were waiting for me to do so I AM SO SORRY that I haven't yet. I will try to get to them this weekend!)

#thank you so much blue heart anon :') #and again SINCEREST APOLOGIES for not responding to and posting your earlier asks - I will do so very soon! :D

[semirahrose]

There was a torturing scene in 13x22. Cas and Dean was torturing a soldire. Many viewers thought that was “cool”. I recalled another torturing scene from 10x03, which was Sam torturing a crossroad demon. At least I couldn’t find anyone who thinks that scene was cool. What would be the difference? Those are the same torturing scene, but one is accused, and the other is okay like it’s no big deal. Sam was in a desperate position. (1/3)

Why would Sam’s motive was ignored and only his brutal action was emphasized? This show chose to accuse Sam. I wonder why they don’t put the same standard to other characters. There are also some dramaturgic difference between demon Dean and soulless Sam. When demon Dean hits someone, they put lively rock music behind and make the scene very thrilling.(10x02) When it comes to soulless Sam, it was never like that.(6x13) (2/3)

Wouldn’t this be a double standard? How come Dean could be a badass while Sam is only ruthless, despite the same violence? Would it be only me who have this inquiry? I would like to listen to your opinion. (3/3)

You are, of course, absolutely correct. The way the show handles Sam’s premeditated violence is completely different from the way it handles Dean’s, or, in some cases, even Castiel’s.

On one hand, it’s absolutely a horrible double standard, and it disgusts me. We saw something very similar in season 13 when it came to Sam and Dean’s expressions of grief. Dean started the season belittling, threatening, and overall being absolutely terrifying to Jack. His accusations and cruelty were significant factors in Jack taking a kitchen knife and attempting to kill himself.

Then again, the show has spent literally 13 whole seasons showing us how unhealthily Dean reacts to loss. He lashed out physically at Sam in season 2 after John’s death. This is not entirely unexpected, and the show doesn’t really hold Dean accountable for his actions. After all, he is grieving. Dean is hurting, too. In fact, fans often see such violence and jump straight to, “Dean must be suffering. Poor Dean!” And while they’re likely correct that Dean is dealing with some sort of emotional turmoil or loss, the way the show deals with his violence means that viewers thoughtlessly excuse it. I’m not saying that fans are not allowed to feel bad for Dean or love him despite his hurtful and unhealthy coping mechanisms. I would, however, appreciate if the show had a more nuanced handling of it. It’s entirely okay to feel sympathy for a character’s bereavement while understanding that the way they react to it is Not Good At All™.

Unfortunately, the way the show deals with violence doesn’t work well for Sam. Where, for Dean, the handling of violence or emotional outbursts has historically been permissive and sympathetic, it’s the exact opposite for Sam. The writers made sure we were worried for Sam’s humanity in the early seasons. We viewed every action with suspicion, even his kindness. Sam is a gentle, caring person, so it was very, very easy for the show to make us suspicious. From the beginning, Sam cared. He was so kind and so emotionally invested in things that he literally only had to do something a tinge less than saintly and we’d be cautious. Oh, wow! Sam did a thing that Dean does every day? Must be going evil.

Soulless!Sam is such a good example of this, and I’m so glad you brought him up. Rewatching season six with a critical eye, it’s hard not to notice that…. objectively, Soulless!Sam was still miles more principled than almost any other hunter in the early seasons. He was pragmatic and direct, but not actively malicious, yet his personality was such a huge departure from his usual self that it set all the alarm bells ringing. (By god, Sam gave his brother a hug but didn’t express enough emotion while doing so?! MUST  BE   E V I L.) 

Sam has good, cheerful, consensual sex with a sex worker who enjoyed the experience so much she forgets she’s working? BUT BY GOLLY Sam didn’t profess his undying love and put a ring on her finger?!

MUST  BE   E V I L.

If Dean did almost anything Soulless!Sam did, viewers would either excuse it or wouldn’t even think twice. But because it was so unthinkable for Sam to do those things, viewers sat up and took notice of even the slightest indication of apathy or lack of consideration.

So I mean… part of it is just Sam’s natural goodness working against him. 

He’s so kind, principled, and serious about his moral code that any departure, no matter how small, is alarming. In contrast, Dean started out as the “unprincipled rogue” who had more or less adopted John’s credo and methods without critically examining them. Sam was the show’s conscience, and viewers held him to a much higher standard because of it. 

Part of it, of course, was that the early seasons were actively vilifying Sam. Sam bleeds a nurse to get the juice to take on Lilith? Absolutely horrible, a literal point of no return. Dean is also killing human vessels without a care in the very same season and helps drain possessed humans a season later? Perfectly all right, if the way the show handled it is any indication.

It’s partly understandable (it’s clear that having that tension about the state of Sam’s soul was important to the writers, and the stronger reactions to Sam’s violence are understandable because it takes a lot more for Sam to act out in anger than it takes for Dean to do the same), but as the seasons go on, and especially as they go on without any balance or nuanced portrayal of the brothers’ violence, it just becomes lazy writing. It got so bad during the MoC arc that it was literally painful to watch the show week by week. I think anyone who lived through it can share horror stories. The Sam hate was unimaginable.

So in season 10, when Sam tortured the demon, it was a shock because he isn’t the type to do that. (Except, if we look back at any time Sam has lost Dean, desperation, suicidal action, and ruthlessness are par for the course.) Meanwhile, Demon!Dean murdered gleefully and people cheered that Dean was finally getting to let go. And in season 13, when Dean’s thoughtless cruelty over the course of several episodes made Jack question his worth and attempt to end his own life, there was little backlash. 

In contrast, when Sam, overcome with emotion, said to a grief counselor that he felt that Dean had more of a relationship with Mary, I can’t even tell you how many posts I saw belittling Sam for that single, 15-second expression of his pain.

It’s a double standard, yes, but it’s a double standard the show has nurtured since its inception, either accidentally or on purpose.

#wank for ts #bittersamgirlclub #spn meta #sam winchester #spnsamwinchester #gonna tag #dean negative #though not really? #and #fandom critical #double standards #narrative bias #my meta #my stuff #anonymous #semirah replies #THANK YOU anon you are absolutely amazing thanks for sharing your analysis!

[liberty-barnes]

hellooo! i'm new here on tumblr and i was just wondering if you had any good blog recs that are larry-related? i'm noticing that people on here have way more info than on twitter (as well as just being overall less confusing haha) so i wanted to check out some blogs to just make my experience in the fandom a bit better. thank you so much!!

Me trying to decide between being helpful and gatekeeping my favourite blogs:

Alright, the helpful side won, damn my parents for raising me to share and be kind.

So first off, quick disclaimer: please try your best to follow Tumblr fandom rules when going to these people and don't be rude to them because they're amazing and I love them so if you mess with them I will track you down and make Hell look like an all-expenses-paid trip to Ibiza.

Now that that's out of the way, here are my favourite blogs, the ones I check every day and got me through the research stage when I actually started to get involved in all things fandom:

@twopoppies: queen of fic recs, always has good discourse, her anons can be very sus sometimes so we keep an eye out for those, perfect mix of kind and sassy, wrote this absolute masterpiece that everyone should read and I couldn't resist mentioning

@daisiesonafield-blog: our lord and saviour, her blog is so organised it can only be the work of a witch because no ordinary human has as much patience as she does to keep it all so neat, pretty much every resource you could need as a Larrie can be found on her blog, it's like having your mom give you a little pamphlet with the location of every single item in your house cause you always forget that the red shirt is in the bottom left drawer. As if that wasn't enough, she's also smart, kind, and runs the @larrytimelines blog, so that really just proves my theory that she isn't actually real, just a figment of our imagination

@indiaalphawhiskey: the Biggest of all the Brains, she puts things you only vaguely imagine into coherent words, just God Tier theories and discourse that blow my mind every time I read them. She also wrote Our Lives, Non-Fiction which is fairly well-known on Twitter, at least in my circles, although my personal favourite is Barefoot In Blue Jeans. Overall, if it has words, she's amazing at it.

@awesomefringey: the nicest person I've ever had the pleasure of interacting with, and I sincerely admire her patience. Leading expert in all things thirst over Larry, but scrolling through her blog will also cause you breakdowns 9/10 times cause she's always putting Larry gifs on our dash. She's the dramatic aunt at family gatherings that'll sneak you vodka when your parents aren't looking while also offering to get you to bed when you inevitably get smashed.

@lesbianslovelouis: the SASSIEST and we LOVE IT, she says things like they are, no filtering, no bullshit, just so genuine and honest you can't help but love her. Also at the start of some very important discussions such as Louis' very soft elbows, the Broli secret relationship, and the "Harry is a mermaid, Louis is a cat" ongoing investigation. quick disclaimer tho, if you want to go to her blog, you better follow Tumblr rules and not be an obnoxious and entitled dick otherwise she'll eat you alive and I'll enjoy every second of it

@skepticalarrie: yet another one with a super-organised blog (seriously which demon did you make a pact with to keep it that nice? I don't understand how). Smart, smart, smart, I've been going through some of her lyric analysis from HS3 lately and it's just so well-done, it makes you see things you maybe hadn't noticed before but make SO MUCH SENSE. Also has a bunch of explanations for things that make us scratch our heads like the "Louis and Harry are mortal enemies" narrative

@genuinemusic: my go-to for all things HS3. Her analysis of AIW is an absolute masterpiece and I can't wait for the rest. Also so cool to read her first listens to the album cause you're already getting a taste for the analysis and I'm nothing if not a whore for deep thinking, it's the English student in me.

@cuethetommo: business queen, the best blog to go to for anything ticket-related, whenever I'm sad I just go through her ASK ME WHY I LOVE HARRY STYLES and MOST BEAUTIFUL BOY tags and then I'm good again. Also has a really organised blog, and her HARRY MERCH tag always makes me feel better when I get angry that Harry's merch honestly sucks

@hellolovers13: my big sister loml, they have the greatest fics (we beta each other's fics too so they're a big part of mine), number 1 niall fan, also a big taylor fan so obviously we love. just overall an amazing person that everyone should follow. they keep me updated on pretty much all things fandom bc I've been very out of touch lately lmao

@lovingstheantidote: literally an amazing blog, joins me sabine and co for thirst time, always has very good opinions and thoughts, and just such a sweet and lovely person (except for when we're thirsting in which case it's time to sin). 10/10 blog, love it

@ladychlo: another amazing blog that I check on the daily because they're just hilarious really and if they're not making posts that make me smash the reblog button, they're reblogging them themselves which makes for a very nice dash for me. a must-have, I would say

as for update accounts, the only two you need are @dailytomlinsonson and @stylesnews which also happen to be the larry love story of tumblr, we ship them so hard as we fucking should tbh

Those are the ones I keep up with the most, even tho there's tons of good people out there that you should definitely check out, so don't be afraid to just branch out on your own, check out random blogs, see if their blog is something you could keep up with.

Since you're from Twitter, there's one main thing you should know about this: NO ONE CARES ABOUT FOLLOWERS. We believe in curating your experience, so follow whoever you want, unfollow whoever you want, and don't worry about saying the wrong thing cause it won't bring in more followers. Tumblr is the best place for you to just be yourself without the fear of being judged or cancelled.

Edit: here is a list of general Tumblr guidelines, and here is a list more catered to the 1D/Larry side of things, I recommend reading both.

#libby answers #larry blog recs #blog recs #seriously all these people are awesome #but you better be good if you go to them #and don't try to change yourself or their blogs cause the vibes don't fit #if the vibes don't fit go vibe somewhere else #also enjoy me unabashedly gushing cause they deserve love and appreciation #they're the kind of people who should get paid #that's how much work they put into this

[if-music-be-the-food-of-love]

Sander just hits different.. like I was rewatching S3 and ep 3 came on and I was like this is not Willem DS this is Sander. They are so different and Willem played him so well with a certain vibe that can only be Sander. I miss him :(

He truly did an amazing job with Sander (and I will always be sad that we didn’t get to see more of him in that role—I’m still shocked at how little we actually have after 3.5 seasons. Wtfockdown was an absolute gift to humanity, albeit an occasionally cringy gift, but it’s basically the best thing that happened in 2020, at least for me, and it was Sander centric!).

To address your ask (kind of?), I honestly struggle sometimes to even believe Sander is the same person between ep 3-5 and ep 8-10, let alone the lovesick marshmallow we saw in wtfockdown. I mean he is, obviously, but there’s this physical transformation he undergoes throughout the season that just amazes me. His cool, edgy vibe becomes so soft and the best word I can think of is cuddly by the last episode. He literally melts before our eyes—that cool, impenetrable exterior slipping away as he realizes he does have value, he is lovable, and he is enough, that he is worthy of the love he seeks.

His hair is symbolic of that transformation. I interpret his blond hair, much like the leather jacket and docs, to be an armor that he wears to protect himself from the world—to project a confident image and act as a barrier (I answered an ask about this not long ago, but as far as we know, he doesn’t have close friends—is this a conscious choice, like does he purposefully set himself apart bc he feels he doesn’t deserve friends/love? God that makes me sad). Back to the hair, I feel like they made a conscious choice to have his hair look more sharp, more strategically styled before he knew Robbe liked him, and then in the scenes where he’s sure of Robbe’s affection it’s much softer, fluffier. By wtfockdown, it’s a wild mess. Of course, that’s just his cut growing out, but I think it parallels Sander’s emotional journey as well. He’s trying so hard at first, trying to project this cool, edgy look, both to attract Robbe and to hide behind. But once he knows how Robbe feels, and gains a better understanding of himself, he relaxes and everything looks more natural, wavy, fluffy, like he’s dropping the armor. By wtfockdown he doesn’t give a shit bc he is confident in Robbe’s love and his place in their relationship. And that’s also why as much as I loved his blond look, I feel that brown haired Sander post season 3/wtfockdown makes so much sense. He doesn’t need it anymore. He’s comfortable in who he is. He’s happy. He can let go of that armor completely and be himself bc he knows he’s enough, that someone knows exactly who he is and loves him anyway. Ok, that’s the hair saga I’ve been sitting on for a year.

BUT, the real transformation is in how he carries himself, his expressions, and that’s all DS. How did he do that? Like the Sander from Dinsdag 16:19 (ep 5) and from Vrijdag 20:18/21:03 (ep 10) are so completely different in how they move, how they carry themselves, their facial expressions. In the first, he’s closed up and angry, standing rigid and so tall, almost leaning away from Robbe, trying to be aloof. In those last clips he’s so relaxed and loose, his posture and his face. The lovesick expression on his face when he smiles at Robbe across the room or the way he lets Robbe twirl him are such a stark contrast, and for me it’s his whole journey. Sander’s arc is so complex. And that’s just one of many contrasts. We meet him in full on flirt mode, but we also see seduction, scared, hurt, confused, excited, etc. Maandag 11:03 is still the pinnacle for me. He’s absolutely brilliant there and totally believable. The range he showed throughout season 3 was just stunning, and it was a whole body transformation (which is why I think you see Sander and not DS bc he IS Sander in that moment, just as he was Max and Tuur?). It’s funny bc I praise Herbots for the exact opposite skill—that he can express so much with so little movement. We always know what he’s thinking.

They did a great job designing Sander’s character, probably my favorite overall change from the og, but how he acted, his portrayal of Sander, was truly something special. I think that’s why it feels so real to us (bc they’re so good at what they do).

Sorry for writing another novel in response. Analysis is pretty much my favorite thing. I never had anyone to share these thoughts with during season 3/wtfockdown, and by now I’m sure everyone has already said all of this. I just missed it.

I miss him too, anon. Thanks for your ask!! Hopefully I answered you at least somewhat coherently. 💖💖

#wtfock #wtfam #sander drieson #I feel like we’ve been missing him for over a year…😔 #writing this gave me the feels bc I usually gush about Robbe #and it reminded me of how much I love Sander too #he IS truly special #I like writing from his POV #maybe I should have thought more about why… #this is fun! #and this is the extent to which I’ll talk about the actors

[erin-bo-berin]

Enemies Closer

MASTERLIST

Happy smutty Spencer Saturday! This fic has been hidden in the depths of my brain for way too long. I knew I wanted to do an enemies to lover fic for a while but didn’t have much more for it until recently. The title comes from the famous saying “keep your friends close and your enemies closer”.

I want to say a big thank you to all of my followers who sent in quips, jabs and bantery remarks. I tried to use them all because they were all so wonderful. Thank you to @dreatine @andiebeaword @sammy-jo1977 @redbullchick and the numerous anons who contributed. Also a big thank you to @multifandommandy for coming up with the idea of the reader interviewing the little girl, it really helped move the story along and add to it. I appreciate all your ideas and help 💕

Okay, enjoy the 10k words of sassy, smutty Spencer Reid. Happy reading!

Spencer Reid/Reader

Rating: M (smut)

Word Count: 10,088

Spencer was walking back to his desk when he heard JJ’s voice.

“Really? When?”

There was a pause on her end of the phone conversation. She looked up and saw Spencer, immediately waving him over.

Spencer’s interest was piqued. He wondered what was going on, especially since there was a huge grin on her face. He approached her desk just as JJ spoke again.

“That sounds great, mom. I can’t wait.”

Spencer smiled. JJ and her mom were extremely close and he always looked forward to her visits—she made the best triple chocolate chip cookies he’d ever tasted. He opened his mouth to tell her to say hi from him, when she practically read his mind.

“By the way Spencer says hi.” 

JJ shot him a wink, grinning at the fact that she knew him well enough to know exactly what he was about to say. He chuckled to himself. They definitely were close enough to know what one another was thinking.

“Sounds good. See you then. Bye.”

JJ hung up her phone, turning in her chair to face him fully.

“Is your mom coming to visit?”

“She is,” JJ smiled, “And she’s bringing your favorite triple chocolate chip cookies.”

“Bless that woman,” he chuckled.

“There’s also something else,” JJ trailed off nervously, a flicker of worry in her blue eyes.

“What?”

“Y/N’s visiting too...and she’s kinda stuck with me, or well us for the next week. So if we get a case, she’s coming with us.”

Spencer groaned loudly.

“Why?”

“Mom has a business seminar in downtown D.C. and you know Will took the boys to Disney World this week. I’m not going to make her sit at home alone for a week.”

“Why? It would be for the greater good of humanity. I’ll even be willing to chip in for a hotel room for her,” Spencer said, hoping JJ would actually take him up on the offer, “Particularly one across the country.” 

“Spencer,” JJ eyed him warily, “Emily already said it was okay. She knows to stay out of the way while we work.”

“Yet she’s always in my way.”

“Spence, she’s not that bad. Why do you hate her so much?” she asked.

“Last time she visited she “accidentally” spilled an entire pot of coffee on my favorite work shirt!” Spencer protested.

“Just like you “accidentally” locked her in an interrogation room?” JJ raised a brow.

Yeah, that hadn’t been his finest moment. But she had driven him crazy that day.

“She wandered in there on her own. I was just helping the situation along,” he shrugged innocently.

“You’re lucky she didn’t burn the building down,” JJ mumbled.

“Yeah, well, she pushed me to my limit that day. Sorry.”

“What is it with you two? You fight worse than her and I ever did.”

“She’s annoying, rude and drives me crazy. I honestly can’t believe she’s your sister, let alone related to you. JJ, you know I love you, but I just can’t stand her. We’re just two completely different people that probably will never get along.”

“Alright, alright,” JJ held her hands up in defeat, “At least try to be on your best behavior?”

“No promises,” he grumbled.

“Hey, look at it this way. At least you get cookies,” she stood, patting his arm before walking away.

He was positive even cookies wouldn’t make up for this.

•

“Y/N while you’re here, can you please try to be nice to your sister’s coworkers?”

You suppressed a groan.

You were currently in the elevator with your mother at the FBI in Quantico, riding up the numerous floors to the Behavioral Analysis Unit, where your sister JJ worked. In your arms were a stack of containers, filled with sweets your mom had made for the team.

There were her famous triple chocolate chip cookies made with milk, dark and white chocolate chips, some apple cobbler, cupcakes and even a strawberry pie. JJ’s team were suckers for Sandy Jareau’s delicacies.

“Mom, I love the team. They’re like extended family, you know that.”

“You know what I mean.”

Your mom gave you a look that you swore only mothers could perfect. It was partly calling out your bullshit and part disciplinary all at the same time. It was amazing, really, 29 years old and you were still getting the “you better not act out” look from her. What were you, eight?

“I mean that lovely Dr. Reid. You’re always so mean to him.”

“He starts it.”

Okay, maybe you were eight.

“Y/N.”

The warning tone in her voice was all you needed to keep your mouth shut.

“All I’m saying is I don’t want another call from JJ saying you’ve gotten locked in an interrogation room and almost got arrested for assaulting a FBI agent.”

“Okay that was one time!” you said, exasperated, “Granted, it wasn’t my finest hour. But still. It’s not like I’m that bad all the time.”

“Really?” your mom looked at you, all knowingly, “What about that one time at JJ’s housewarming party?”

“I swear I didn’t glue his shoes to the floor!”

In your defense, that had been Derek Morgan, back when he was still working in the FBI, prior to his resignation. Of course though, no one believed that he had done it, apparently including your mother.

“Whether you did it or not, that’s not the point. You would’ve done it given the opportunity.”

You couldn’t deny that. 

“Just don’t stress JJ out any more than she is. She said when the two of you are fighting it’s like trying to corral two feisty chihuahuas.”

You sighed, defeated.

“I’ll try to be on my best behavior mom.”

“Thank you. That’s all I ask.”

The elevator dinged, alerting you that you’d arrived at your designated floor and the metal doors slid open to reveal your sister and of course, Spencer.

Spencer Reid, the biggest nemesis of your entire life.

He was absolutely infuriating. 

Tall, imposing, three PhDs, IQ of 187, Doctor Spencer Reid. That’s right, he wasn’t just Agent Reid, he was Dr. Reid. It was eye roll inducing.

He was a know-it-all, quite literally. If anyone said something even the slightest bit wrong, he didn’t hesitate to correct them. A person could breathe wrong and he’d probably correct that.

He constantly spewed facts. That was annoying enough in itself. You had no idea how JJ put up with it. But then again she was best friends with the guy. That blew your mind enough in itself.

If he wasn’t so annoying, he might actually be attractive. With a stature of over six feet, he was lean but without being a beanpole. His light brown curls always looked like he’d just rolled out of bed and/or never taken a brush to his hair. His eyes were definitely interesting though. You could never tell if they were brown, green or maybe even hazel.

Not that you’d been paying that close of attention. Nor did you care.

He had significantly more facial hair than the last time you’d seen him. Not a bad look for him, you had to give him that.

JJ once told you that a college class he’d taught for two weeks was filled with nothing but young girls auditing his course. She said it had confused Spencer. It confused you too cause you didn’t see how he was that attractive. He was kinda cute, if you liked the whole snobby, genius who doesn’t brush his hair, smartass type.

Oddly enough, you’d known him for half your life, yet couldn’t recall how or when you started hating him. It just seems like it had been that way all along, when in fact, it hadn’t.

“Mom! Y/N!” JJ exclaimed, grinning wide.

You felt a burst of happiness in your chest. You’d missed your sister. Despite the 11 year age difference, you guys were close growing up.

You were still a baby when your older sister Rosalyn had committed suicide, so you didn’t remember much about her, sadly. It was really hard on JJ as she was the one to find her. But as she’d told you much later, you’d helped her grieve. Reliving memories and keeping Rosalyn’s memory alive in sharing stories with you helped her heal after such a traumatic situation. It was often that you’d wished you’d had the chance to know your oldest sister, but with her death came an impenetrable close bond between you and JJ.

JJ immediately wrapped her arms around your mother, hugging her tight. You gave a nod of your head, your arms too full to be able to hug her at the moment.

“I’ll just go put these in the briefing room,” you said.

You turned, aiming to head through the glass doors of the BAU’s entrance, but instead ran right into Spencer.

“Here, I got it,” he took several of the boxes out of your arms so you could see properly again, “If only to save you from injuring anyone else.”

“My knight in shining armor,” you muttered sarcastically.

“Watch where you’re going next time.”

“You watch where you’re going. Besides, I didn’t need your help,” you retorted.

“Obviously, you did,” Spencer mumbled, following you through the doors.

You hadn’t even made it all the way through the entrance when you heard your mom and JJ sigh in unison. You heard JJ’s words loud and clear, as well.

“They’re already bickering less than five minutes in. Must be a new record.”

It kinda was. Usually, the two of you managed to avoid each other until the inevitable crossing of paths occurred. Today, though, you both had started in, right off the bat.

You placed the numerous arrays of desserts on the round table, knowing by tomorrow they’d pretty much all be gone.

“You’re welcome for the help,” Spencer snarked, setting down the few containers he’d carried.

You couldn’t help it, you rolled your eyes.

“I didn’t ask for it. So there’s no reason to thank you.”

“It’s the polite thing to do. Oh, wait. I forgot you don’t know how to be polite. My bad.”

You glared at him, the hatred stirring in your gut.

“I wish I could say it’s been a pleasure to see you again, Y/N, but it hasn’t,” Spencer said.

“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go greet your mother who actually deserves and appreciates my kindness.”

“Kindness, my ass,” you muttered as he walked away.

He turned, almost to the door.

“What was that?”

“Nothing,” you smiled in a fake, sweet matter.

He scoffed, turning and walking away.

Only when his back was turned did your fake demeanor drop and you stuck your tongue out at him.

This man would be the death of you yet.

•

“Penelope just got us a case. Luckily, it’s right here in our backyard so you can just sit in while we work. But please try to control your mouth.”

“JJ, I’m almost 30 years old,” you replied.

“Yes, but you still have a sharp tongue.”

“I promise not to make a scene, cause any trouble or be in the way. I know you have to work Jayj.”

After a round of greetings and hugs from the team and promises to stay longer when she returned from her business seminar, your mom had dashed off, leaving you at the BAU.

You looked up to see Emily Prentiss, JJ’s friend and boss motioning for her to join them in the briefing room.

“The team has to be debriefed about this case. Are you going to be okay here?”

You spun back and forth in her desk chair, motioning to the book you’d brought to read.

“I’ll be fine. Go work,” you shooed her.

JJ bounded off and up the stairs to the meeting and you picked up your book, ready to be entranced by the wonderful fantasy world of your book, far away from your reality.

-

“Why do people read that garbage? It does nothing but fills a person’s head with nonsense. It’s stupid and a waste of time. Although, now that I think of it, that’s probably a perfect fit for you.”

You peered up over the edge of your book.

You’d just gotten to a good part in your book. Your heroine was just getting ready to destroy the enemy and his lair, saving her love interest from the clutches of evil. It was a shame you couldn’t throw Spencer in the cage that your heroine was saving her lover from. Now that would make the book perfect.

“I’m reading. If you don’t mind.”

“Well it offends me. At least read something good. War and Peace is a good recommendation. Good story. I read it at breakfast last weekend,” Spencer said.

You turned up your nose. Leave it to Spencer to brag about his ability to read 20,000 words a minute and offer atrocious book recommendations in the same sentence. That in itself was offensive enough to you.

“This is why you don’t get dates, isn’t it?” you snipped.

He ignored the quip. 

“I’m supposed to ask you for help with the case.”

Now this was interesting. You raised an eyebrow.

“What makes you think I want to help you?”

“You do realize the entire world doesn’t revolve around you, right?” Spencer’s eyes narrowed, “There’s kids that are going missing.”

That sobered you quickly. You dropped any anger you had at him, for the moment, realizing how serious the matter was.

“How? What’s happening?”

“Four kids have gone missing. We can’t figure out how or why. They haven’t shown up yet, so we’re hopeful that they’re still alive,” Spencer said, lips narrowed into a thin line.

“What do you need my help for then?”

“Because to understand what happened to them, we need to profile these kids.”

•

“Okay so we know from his parents, six year old Erik Yates was incredibly shy,” JJ said, looking at the whiteboard where the pictures of the four missing children were hung.

“He wouldn’t have talked to his own school teacher, let alone a stranger,” David Rossi said.

“But his best friend, Carlos Hoffman also went missing with him. They were having a sleepover, so he’d been at Erik’s house,” Emily added.

“And Carlos was the more outgoing of the two, wasn’t he?” you asked.

“Yup,” Tara said, flipping through her notes, “According to the parents, wherever Carlos went Erik was always close behind. So if they encountered a stranger, if Carlos was willing to go, Erik would likely follow.”

“I don’t know about that,” you piped in, “I’ve seen friendships like that in my class. Even if the kid is quiet, if they know something is wrong, they either say something to their friend or they just don’t do it period. I find it hard to believe that Erik would go along with someone he wasn’t comfortable with.”

“Says the one that’s not a profiler,” Spencer mumbled from where he was standing, examining the evidence board.

JJ shot him a look, before returning to the conversation. You pretended not to hear that one and for once, bit your tongue. You wouldn’t accomplish anything by arguing with Spencer at the moment.

“So let’s go back to the top,” Matt said, “Mrs. Yates went to the door and there was someone there either selling something or had an excuse made up for the unsub to guilt trip money out of her. She leaves to get her purse. The kids are in the living room playing. Then suddenly, by the time she gets back, all three are gone.”

“That’s how her story goes,” Luke said, looking through interview notes.

“What about the other children?” you asked, “How were they taken?”

“One was kidnapped at the park, the other at the grocery store,” Spencer answered.

“What if it’s someone familiar with their routines?” you asked.

You weren’t anywhere close to being a profiler, but you knew enough from JJ to sort of get by in this conversation.

“A lot of my kids and their families have strict routines. Usually because it benefits the child and/or they have other children that they keep on a schedule too. Wouldn’t that mean that it’s someone that they know?”

“It could,” Emily said, “But unfortunately that doesn’t narrow down much because the unsub could also just be stalking these families before the kidnapping. The unsub could potentially be a complete stranger to them.”

“Have you asked the parents of the children if they could think of anyone who could do this? Is there anyone that might overlap with these families?” you inquired.

JJ had opened her mouth to answer you, but of course, Spencer had to add his two cents. 

“Are you an idiot? Of course, we did,” Spencer snapped, “That’s always the first thing we do.”

You bristled. Even when working together, he couldn’t be civil. He had the nerve to try and insult you and make you feel stupid, even though all you were trying to do was help.

“I’m not an idiot, Spencer,” you grit out.

“Oh really? You sure do act like one sometimes,” he retorted, writing something on the board.

Your defenses snapped back into place and you were ready to shoot back a remark when JJ interrupted you.

“Hey, hey, you guys. Quit it before I have to send you both into separate corners for timeout. We’re all on the same team here, trying to accomplish the same thing. Let’s just focus.”

“Matt, Dave, JJ, I want you to go and reinterview the parents. Y/N has a point. We need to make absolutely sure there’s no one in these families lives that connect with one another,” Emily ordered.

“Luke, Tara; both of you go to the schools. See if there’s been any strangers lurking around. We can’t rule out a sexual predator just yet, but it would help vastly if we could.”

“Penelope, you and I are going to work on a deep dive of these families.”

Garcia’s face scrunched at Emily’s order; she hated diving into people’s personal lives, but unfortunately it sometimes came with the job.

“We’re going to make sure that these parents aren’t holding back any secrets that could possibly help us.”

Emily turned towards you and Spencer next.

“Spence, I want you to start on a geo profile, see if we can figure out the vicinity of the unsub’s hunting grounds. Maybe we might even be able to find where he’s holding them.”

“On it.”

Spencer was already grabbing a map, spreading it across the round table.

“Y/N, I want you to help him.”

Spencer’s head snapped up.

“Hell no. Emily please-”

She held up her hand.

“I don’t want to hear it. That’s an order. If you disobey, I will put you behind a desk for a month.”

He relented, but you could tell he wasn’t happy about it. Not like you were pleased at all by it either.

“Try not to burn the room down while you’re working,” she instructed, walking out to meet Garcia in her lair.

Once she left, Spencer spun towards you.

“Let’s get one thing clear. You’re not to bother me while I work. You stay out of my way. I don’t need your help, nor do I want it. I can do my work just fine without you. I’ve been doing it for 15 years,” he snapped.

“Don’t flatter yourself, Spencer. Even I can tell when your IQ gets slashed to 60.”

“That’s the best you got, Y/N? I didn’t realize they let bimbos into the FBI. Oh wait...that’s right. I’m the one that’s the actual agent here. What is it you do again?”

“I’m a kindergarten teacher. You know that, you dumbass or else I wouldn’t be here helping you.”

“Oh, guess there’s no sleeping to the top in that field. Although, I wouldn’t put it past you.”

Your fists clenched. Spencer made you mad like no other could. Not even JJ could ever make you this mad.

“Just sit down and shut up while the adults work, okay?” he sneered at you.

“I’m not a child!”

You crossed your arms defensively. You weren’t about to let him get in all the insults. Ignoring him never worked, he was too obnoxious. So you just played it like he did, by slinging insults like dodgeballs at him.

“Well if you’re going to act like a child, I’m going to treat you like a child!” he threw back.

His eyes were blazing, his cheeks gone pink from his anger. 

“Funny because you act more immature than my kindergartners.”

“WILL YOU TWO CAN IT AND GET TO WORK?!”

You both jumped at the sound of Garcia yelling from the bullpen. She made the motion that she’d be keeping her eyes on you two. You threw one more scowl Spencer’s way before flopping down on the sofa on the other side of the room.

This week was going to last an eternity.

•

Two days passed with no luck on finding an unsub, but they’d managed to put a profile together based on what little they did know.

The entire team was worried and on edge. Of course, that made the situation between you and Spencer even more volatile.

“Are you sure you’re an actual qualified agent? All you do is stand in front of a room full of police or your team and say smart things and gesture with your hands,” you mimicked Spencer, doing exactly what he was just doing earlier while they gave the profile.

“I do not look like that! You look like a baby dinosaur who doesn’t know how to walk,” he jeered.

“Yes, you do. All I’m saying is these civil service exams must be really easy to pass nowadays, huh?” you smirked.

“You know I’d ask if you could really be any more infuriating, but I’m afraid you’d take that as a challenge,” Spencer huffed, “Besides I’m supposed to be “nice” to you, since you’ve been so helpful.”

“I’m sorry, what was that?” you grinned mischievously, “I’ve been what?”

“I’m just quoting what Emily said. In my opinion you’ve been more like a pain in my ass,” he mumbled, looking through one of the case files.

“Oh sure because without me, would you’ve figured out that the unsub is a woman?”

“Probably. Don’t pat yourself on the back, sweetheart. You’re no match for us real profilers, Y/N.”

“I may not be, but you’ve met your match with me, pretty boy,” the nickname falling from your lips with deep sarcasm, “You can’t help but fight with me. For some reason I get under your skin and frankly, I enjoy it. It’s nice to know you can actually squirm, Spencer Reid.”

His lips pursed and he was about to speak when the phone rang. He answered it, putting it on speaker. Garcia’s excited voice came through it.

“Reid, gather the team. You won’t believe what I’ve found.”

•

“So it turns out, one of our families did have a secret. Although, it was something we weren’t even looking for,” Penelope said.

“What’s that Garcia?” Tara asked.

“The family of the first missing child: Daisy Rowe, had a nanny once. Her name is Kali Dye.”

Garcia hit the remote button to pull up the woman’s picture on the big screen at the front of the room.

“What does she have to do with our case?” Luke asked.

She stared at him, exasperated.

“If I could finish what I was saying, you’d know,” Penelope griped.

“Okay, okay,” Luke chuckled, “Carry on.”

You lived for Luke and Penelope’s playful banter. It was like the complete opposite of you and Spencer. They liked each other at the end of the day—not to mention everyone knew deep down they were definitely attracted to one another. Their banter was flirty. Yours and Spencer’s was anything but.

“As I was saying,” Penelope continued, “Kali was the nanny to the Rowe family back in 2016 when Daisy was only two years old. There was an incident where apparently she turned her back on little Daisy playing in the backyard. Daisy got too near the pool and almost drowned. She was in the hospital for a few days afterwards. The parents were obviously furious. I’m guessing Mrs. Rowe told all her friends about it because according to my research, Kali’s nannying career was basically ruined.”

“So you think this is an act of revenge? Did she nanny for any of the other kids she kidnapped?” Emily asked.

“No, that’s where it gets weird. She seems to have no connection to these other children,” Garcia said.

“Well we know who our unsub most likely is,” JJ said, “But how are we going to find out where she and the kids are?”

“I checked for that. There’s no significant places that she would take them, her old family house isn’t even in the state and besides it’s been sold years ago,” Penelope answered.

Emily’s phone rang as the team continued to throw around ideas of where to find Kali. 

“Prentiss.”

You watched Emily’s face quickly change expressions, from neutral to shock, to worry, back to businesslike.

“Okay, bring her to Quantico. We’ll need to interview her.”

Emily hung up, turning to the team.

“The second child kidnapped, Eden Jenson just showed up at a police station in D.C. She managed to get away and ran for help. We need to interview her, but she hasn’t spoken yet. The chief of the police station is having one of his detectives drive here so we can interview her,” Emily filled the rest of the team in.

“I’ll talk to her. I’m pretty good at getting kids to talk,” Spencer said.

“Actually, I think we should let Y/N do it,” JJ said, looking at Emily.

“What?! She has no experience interviewing a witness, much less a victim!” Spencer exclaimed.

“I worked in art therapy when I was getting my degree as a teacher. I still use some in my class, plus I’m a teacher,” you said defiantly, “I know how to talk to kids.”

“I agree with JJ,” Emily said, “But Spencer, sit in with her just in case you need to intervene.”

You were sure he was going to do plenty of that.

•

An hour later, you and Spencer were sitting in front of a little, terrified Eden. Her—what you assumed were once neat—blonde pigtails were in all types of disarray. Pieces stood up everywhere while other strands came loose, hanging around her face. She was clutching her bunny stuffie, which you figured had been with her when she was kidnapped.

She had refused to talk to anyone, shrinking away frightfully at any imposing adults. You had to restrain yourself from literally pushing Spencer out the door when she shrunk even more into herself when she saw Spencer’s tall frame.

She’d been previously asked if she was hungry or thirsty in which she barely nodded. Now, she sat a bit less rigidly as she ate her Goldfish crackers and sipped on her juice box.

“Eden, my name is Y/N and this is my…friend, Spencer.”

You had to admit, you had a rough time getting that one out. 

“We just want to talk to you, okay?” you said.

The little girl just stared back at you, wide eyed.

“Do you like to color?” you asked.

Still no response.

You pulled out some paper and a pack of crayons from a bin next to the desk. You pushed them across towards her.

“Could you draw something for us?”

It took a moment of Eden staring at the items before she opened the box and picked up a crayon.

“Do you mind if we ask you some questions while you color?”

You didn’t expect an answer, so you weren’t surprised when none came.

“Are you six years old? Six is a fun age. Are you in kindergarten or first grade?”

Eden looked up at you, from underneath her lashes, just briefly, before returning to drawing.

“I’m a kindergarten teacher myself. I’m used to seeing kids your age all the time. It’s spring break though and I miss my kids terribly. Do you miss going to school?”

Spencer shifted in his seat. You knew time was a delicate thing right now, but you were trying to get her to trust you.

“Eden?” 

She looked up again. If she was surprised to hear Spencer speak for the first time, she didn’t show it.

“Could you describe the place you were at?”

Fear flashed in her eyes and she dropped her crayon, hugging tightly to her bunny.

You glared at Spencer.

“Just keep drawing, Eden. Okay? We’ll be right back,” you said, standing up, your hand a death grip on his arm.

Once the two of you had stepped out of the room and the door was closed behind you, you whirled on him.

“How can you be so stupid? I thought you were supposed to be a genius!”

“Y/N, you know we’re running on limited time to find those kids. We don’t know if Kali will hurt them or not!”

“I realize that. I’m trying to make her comfortable enough to talk about it.”

“Avoiding it doesn’t seem to be helping either,” he grimaced, hands on his hips.

“You saw what happened when you brought it up! She was terrified!”

“When dealing with a traumatized child you should tell them information about the situation they were in. It’s best they learn it from a trusted adult. Besides, it’s most likely they want to talk about it, but just don’t know how to bring it up.”

“And how would you know all of this, doctor?”

“Because contrary to your beliefs about me, I actually know how to do my job and how to do it well. I’ve dealt with things like this many times before. 60% of adults report being traumatized in childhood. 26% of children in the United States alone will witness or experience a traumatic event before the age of four.”

You blinked, unable to process so much information at once.

“Are you even human?” 

“Are you?” Spencer shot back, eyes narrowed.

“You know, with all things considered, I’d thought you’d gotten the idea that I really hate you.” you sneered.

“Really? And here I thought that was your version of flirting,” he retaliated, sarcastically.

“Moron,” you muttered under your breath.

“Now, if you’re through calling me names, I’ve got work to do,” he said, reaching behind you for the doorknob.

“Wait,” you grabbed his arm, “Just let me try again first? Please? If I get stuck or need you, I’ll let you know.”

It was some of the most civil words you’d said to him in a long time. But you didn’t want to give up on this little girl. You wanted to help her and prove to Spencer and yourself if you were being honest, that you could do it.

He must’ve noticed your serious tone and pleading eyes because he relented. He nodded and you turned to go back in.

Eden was waiting for you when you returned, back to clutching her bunny.

“Don’t you want to finish your picture?” you asked, sitting down in front of her.

She pushed it across to you.

“Oh are you done?”

She nodded.

You picked up the picture, noticing four stick figures. Two seemed to be girls, two seemed to be boys. They looked like they could represent all four missing kids.

“Are these you and your friends?” you asked gently.

She didn’t say anything for a beat, then came a soft, timid voice.

“They aren’t my friends...at least not until a few days ago.”

“My friends here, they found out that you didn’t know these other three children. Is that right?”

Eden nodded again.

“Do you know the woman who took you?”

“No,” she said, equally as quiet as before.

“You’re doing a great job, Eden,” you smiled at her, hoping to encourage her, “Just a few more questions, okay?”

Another nod.

“Can you describe where you were?”

“I...I don’t know,” her voice trembled, as if she were going to cry.

You heard the door open up behind you and you turned to see Spencer. He gave you a terse shake of his head, as if telling you now was not the time to snap at him.

“Eden?” Spencer came around to her side and crouched by her, “You remember me, right? I’m Spencer.”

She nodded hesitantly.

“I want to try to help you help Miss Y/N here. To tell her what the place looked like that you were at.”

“But I don’t remember,” Eden said, frowning.

“I think you do. You know how when you’re afraid, you hide?” Spencer asked gently.

Eden nodded her answer.

“Well, that’s kinda what your brain is doing. It’s scared, so you think you can’t remember. What I want to do is have you to close your eyes and think back to before you were taken.”

“No, I’m scared,” Eden whimpered, hugging the stuffie.

“It’ll be okay. I’m right here,” he offered her his hand, which she took reluctantly, “I’ll be right here the entire time. If things get too scary, just squeeze my hand and we can stop. Alright?”

“Alright.”

She closed her eyes, listening to Spencer’s voice.

You were amazed at how soft and gentle he was with her. It was like seeing all of his razor sharp edges he displayed around you, smoothed out. You couldn’t remember if you’d ever heard him like this.

“Just focus on the sound of my voice,” Spencer whispered, “You were playing at the park. What were you doing?”

“Playing on the swing with my bunny,” she said.

“Okay, that’s good Eden, you’re doing wonderful. What do you hear?”

“Lots of kids playing. They’re very loud.”

“What happens next?”

“There’s a lady behind me. She asks if I would like to play in the sandbox with her. I told her yes but I didn’t want to get bunny dirty.”

Eden is trembling now and you eye Spencer warily. He holds his free hand up and you don’t say anything, just yet.

“Very good Eden. Did you go play in the sandbox?”

“No. She took my hand and led me away from the swings. I asked her where she’s going because the sandbox was the other way.”

“Do you want to stop, Eden?” Spencer asked.

“N-No. I a big girl like mommy always says.”

“Okay. What happened then, sweetheart?”

“She grabbed me and put her hand over my mouth. I tried screaming for my mommy, but I couldn’t. She took me to a car.”

“Can you remember what the car looked like?”

“Um, blue. It was blue. It had a lot of doors. It was long too.”

Spencer looked like he realized what she was describing.

“Did the middle door slide open and closed?”

She nodded, her eyes still closed.

“It was big inside with lots of seats. That’s all I saw before she covered my eyes.”

It sounded like an SUV or family van.

“When you were in the car, did you ride for a really long time? Or a short time?”

“A short time.”

You jotted the note down.

“One last question honey. Do you remember anything about the room you were in? What did it look like?”

“Like...like my bedroom. Only much dirtier. And old looking. There’s...there’s flowers on the wall. There’s a lot of toys, but I don’t want to play. I want to go home. Me and my friends are so scared. She’s coming back, she's coming back!”

“It’s okay, it’s okay! I’m right here.”

Eden’s eyes snapped open and he enveloped her in his arms, holding her tightly as she trembled.

She didn’t let go of him until her parents arrived.

•

After kicking the information over to Garcia and her being the goddess she is at finding even the most hidden information, she found the house.

The team had found her car, registered to Kali, but with a false last name. From there, Garcia looked for any run down buildings or homes for rent within 10 to 15 minutes of that park. The team agreed that Kali wouldn’t have bought a house for the simple reason of too much work. She didn’t seem to be that dedicated to a well thought out plan. That was when Garcia discovered an old house rented under the name of Kali Rowe, the same last name of the family she had been a nanny for.

You stayed behind while the team went out to rescue the children and hopefully bring Kali Dye into custody. 

They did.

All four kids were now safely reunited with their parents and Kali had been arrested and hopefully was going to get the help she needed.

Since you hadn’t been there, JJ had filled you in afterwards when everybody had gotten back. You were sitting next to one another in the briefing room, talking, while everything settled down. 

Kali Dye had been so distraught over the loss and destruction of her nannying career. Apparently at one point, she had been a wonderful nanny. What had happened with Daisy, truly was an accident. Whether she had had a mental breakdown or suffered from an unknown or untreated mental illness beforehand, they didn’t know. But she soon became desperate to prove she was a good nanny.

She kidnapped Daisy first, to prove her point. Then three other children that she’d followed, learning their schedules. 

She had taken good care of them, at least in her mind. In reality, she hadn’t hurt them or touched them one bit. She fed them, gave them all attention and all the toys they wanted, to play with.

It was a sad situation, really. But you were glad that the families had a happy ending and their children were back safely in their homes tonight.

“You did good little sis,” JJ smiled, “Keep it up and you may just have to think about switching careers.”

“No thanks,” you chuckled, “I’m happy teaching kids, not seeing them in life threatening situations. I don’t have the heart for that.”

“Spence said you did really well getting Eden to open up,” she said.

“I’m surprised he actually knows how to compliment a person, let alone me,” you scoffed.

“Y/N. Come on. What’s your deal with him? This has been going on for years now.”

“I don’t know. I just can’t stand him.”

“That’s a cop out and you know it,” JJ said, “He’s a good guy. Besides, you used to have a crush on him when you were younger.”

“Ew, did I?” 

You wrinkled your nose, trying to remember. JJ had joined the BAU when you were only 14. A lot had happened in high school, let alone the 15 years since she’d first joined. You didn’t visit her very often because of school and all of your other extracurricular activities, so you hadn’t met the team until about a year after she started.

“You don’t mean the summer after my freshman year, do you?” you asked, “Cause back then he was a cute little dweeb and it lasted like two seconds anyway. I had a case of raging hormones to the point I had a crush on just about anything male with two legs.”

You rolled your eyes, disgusted at the fact she’d even think that you’d have a crush on Spencer. Although deep down, deep, deep, deep down, a little part of you knew that she’d hit the nail on the head.

“Why do you hate him though? He’s my best friend. I love him and I want you two to get along.”

You snorted.

“Yeah, I know you love him. Remember, you told me that you told him that you’ve always loved him? That he was your first love?”

You bit your lip, trying hard to keep the jealous edge out of your tone. This is what you’d tried hard to avoid all these years. You hated that you felt like this but you’d been covering up your true feelings for him and the situation, with anger all these years. If you kept yourself at a distance, you were less likely to get hurt.

How wrong you were.

“Is that what this is about? Because I told Spence I loved him?”

“No.”

Maybe.

“Y/N.”

She gave you the same look that your mother had given you in the elevator just days before.

“Jeez, you’ve got mom’s “look” down pat,” you mumbled.

“Please tell me the truth. Is my confession why you hate him?”

Her eyes pleaded with you and you couldn’t help but cave. She was your sister and your best friend and you knew she cared.

“No. I don’t know, maybe partially. But I disliked him way before that anyway. He’s just a know-it-all smartass, that annoys the shit out of me and is just like every other guy to fall head over heels in love with Jennifer Jareau.”

You grimaced, “For a guy that has an IQ of 187, he sure doesn’t know how to be different from other guys.”

“Okay hold up,” JJ held up her hands, “First of all, he is not head over heels in love with me.”

“JJ, please. You’re not an idiot.”

“I’m serious. He may have been once, but he’s not anymore. We’re best friends and that’s it. Besides, we worked out that mess over a year ago. He’s even dated since then.”

“The kid actually dates? I’m shocked,” you said, putting a hand on your chest in mock surprise.

JJ ignored your antics, continuing on.

“Second. He’s actually a really great guy, Y/N. He’s a real sweetheart, really. It’s just a side of him that you don’t see.”

“Yeah like the dark side of the moon,” you muttered.

“Just give him a chance and try to be nice? You know what mom always said. You catch more flies with honey than vinegar. Besides, if you want to go for him, that’s fine.”

You laughed outright at that. As if that would happen.

“On that note, I think I’m gonna head back to your place,” you said standing.

“I have to stay a little later to finish up some work. Can you get home okay on your own?”

You assured her you could and you grabbed your purse. 

“Y/N?” she called, as you were about to the glass doors.

“Yeah?” 

“Just think about what I said, okay?”

•

If you thought you were gonna get a reprieve after that uncomfortable conversation, you were sorely mistaken.

The moment you stepped out of the BAU, you saw Spencer standing, waiting for the elevator, his hands clutching the strap of his tan satchel as he waited.

“Ah, there she is. The woman who saved the day,” he quipped sarcastically.

“Fuck off Reid. I’m not in the mood.”

“You know, I’m actually shocked that you’re good at something besides bitching.”

You ignored him, your teeth clenching.

“I’m surprised you held your tongue as long as you did earlier. Bet that’s a record for you.”

The elevator doors opened and you got on without a word, Spencer following you.

“What? No comebacks? Amazing. Has Spencer Reid actually won for once?”

You whirled on him, dropping your purse to the elevator floor in the process.

“No because you’re full of shit. You’re the most annoying, stubborn ass, infuriating, egocentric, smart aleck in a fancy suit I’ve ever met!”

His eyes narrowed and his mouth hardened. He pulled his satchel over his head, dropping it too, to the floor. He pushed the emergency button of the elevator with such anger, it was amazing that he didn’t break it. The elevator suddenly came to an abrupt halt.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?!” you screeched.

Your body was thrumming with anger. You could and likely would pummel him at any second.

“You’re not leaving this elevator until you tell me what the fuck your problem is,” Spencer glared.

“My problem?” you huffed.

“Yes because I have to deal with you jumping down my throat every single time I see you. You’re the most stuck up, spoiled, self centered, bitchy little brat I’ve had to deal with!”

“Ha! You sure you’re not talking about yourself?”

“You know what I think your problem is?” he challenged.

“Go ahead, try me. I’d love to hear.”

“I think, you don’t know how to deal with how you’re really feeling. So you hide it under anger. You lash out every time your feelings threaten to surface. It’s become a defense mechanism. It’s all you know. You fight with me because it’s the only way to protect yourself; you throw words as your daggers. Simply because you can’t get me out of your mind. I push you to limits you don’t want to think about. You may swear and declare that you hate me but in reality, you’d be thrilled if I took you right up against this elevator wall.”

His voice grew deeper with every word that tumbled out of his mouth.

“Are you profiling me? Cause that’s one hell of a reach.”

“Is it though? You wanna know how I figure that? You told me the other day that I met my match. That I can’t help but fight with you because you get under my skin. Well you were right. I do enjoy it and I think you do too. Because it turns you on. It does the same thing to me. You get under my skin yet at the same time all I can think about is how I want to fuck you until you’re screaming my name.”

“You think I’m gonna fall for that shit from just another guy who’s crazy about JJ?” you sneered.

For the first time, he actually looked just the tiniest bit surprised.

“You think I have feelings for JJ? If I had feelings for her, do you honestly think I’d spend all my time and attention on you?”

“How the hell am I supposed to know?”

“JJ isn’t the one that occupies my brain, no matter what I try to do, Y/N,” he said through gritted teeth.

His face was mere inches away from yours now. Close enough to see an array of scattered freckles on his face. A few under one eye, a tiny one on the side of his nose, one on his forehead.

His stubble had gotten heavier in the last few days, becoming more scruff than stubble. His lips were naturally plump, an asset that would be the envy of any woman. They were also a natural shade of dark pink, maybe even leaning towards red. 

Anger heated his eyes. Or was it desire? You wondered if you looked the same way. Right now, they looked more green in the brighter light in the elevator, but you could still see rings of brown around the edges of his eyes. They were also filled with mischief as if he were up for a challenge.

“You really think you’re going to distract me by putting your tongue in my mouth and getting my panties wet?” you hissed.

“Is that what you want?” 

A smirk formed on his lips. He was definitely challenging you.

Your legs were trembling now. Although if you were to admit it, you weren’t entirely sure if it was from anger or arousal.

You pressed your lips together, refusing to say anything, almost afraid what would come out of your mouth. He had you cornered up against the wall now.

“Maybe I should just find out for myself,” he said, propping his hands on either side of the wall by your head, “Make you moan in my mouth while I finger you.”

The anger that was coursing your veins earlier had definitely now turned into desire. Your stomach churned with it. You could feel his body mere inches from yours and the heat from it was making your entire body temperature feel that much higher.

“It’s not like I haven’t imagined making you moan my name,” he whispered, his voice gravelly, his tongue moving out over his lips in a quick swipe.

Your breathing had become shallow and you were throbbing with need. Before you could think of what you were doing, you were already unbuttoning your jeans.

“For once in your life I wish you’d shut up and just do it,” you grunted.

He grabbed your face roughly with both hands, his lips colliding with yours. They were hot and rough against yours, this kiss so hungry and animalistic that it was unreal.

His body was pressed against yours as he pressed you against the cool, metal wall. You could feel his arousal pressed against your thigh and you unwittingly moaned into his mouth. You had a difficult time wrapping your head around the fact that you’d gotten him so hard.

Then again, you were having a hard time wrapping your mind around anything that didn’t involve him.

His tongue moved with yours, ironically increasing your desire, making you wetter. Just like you’d voiced earlier. Damn, the guy sure knew what he was doing.

He pulled your jeans roughly down your legs until they were enough out of the way that he was satisfied. His lips attacked your jaw, then neck, being anything but gentle, but it was working you up more than anything.

Your hands gripped his arms, your teeth bearing down into your bottom lip, resisting the urge to give in to what he wanted: hearing you moan.

He pulled away from you making you suddenly desperate for his lips on your skin again. He pried your hands away from him and held them against the wall, his hips pressing into yours.

His suit pants were a lot thinner than your jeans, so you could feel his erection pressing into you, dangerously close to your throbbing core where all of a sudden, you wanted him the most.

Spencer’s fingers ghosted over the fabric of your underwear, causing you to inhale sharply. It felt good and you wanted more.

You reached for his hand, trying to push it against your core, but he pulled it away, shaking his head.

“No. This is all you’re getting until you admit it.”

His finger trailed up the center of your panties, having just enough pressure to slightly feel his touch. You groaned at his teasing. If your past years of banter had been foreplay then you were more than ready for him to have you.

“Admit what?”

“That you want this,” Spencer stated simply.

His fingertip swirled lightly over the fabric, just above your clit. Light enough that you didn’t get any real friction from the touch and you bucked your hips, desperate to feel it.

“I think it’s fucking obvious,” you said through clenched teeth.

“Yes, but I want to hear you say it.”

His smirk was wolfish. You knew he wasn’t going to give in unless you did what he said.

“I want this,” you groaned.

“What’s that?” he tipped his head to the side, “Can’t hear you.”

“I want this,” you said, a notch louder, gripping his wrist.

“This?”

His fingers dipped into your underwear and his thumb pressed hard against your clit.

“Ah, fuck yes,” you moaned.

He grinned, his finger dipping into your wet warmth.

“Seems like my tongue in your mouth did indeed make you wet,” he chuckled lowly, pulling your underwear off with his other hand.

His fingers teased you as you writhed and moaned, clawing at the elevator wall behind you. He had this amazing way of rubbing his knuckles against your walls as his fingers pumped in and out of you.

“Holy shit, fuck Spencer,” you whined.

You were so turned on, you hardly had any recognition of what was tumbling out of your mouth. It sure seemed to please Spencer, though.

He kept you on your toes though, slowing his fingers just when you thought you were reaching the brink of your orgasm, twisting them so gradually, it was almost painfully pleasant. You swore your eyes almost rolled back in your head when his fingers curled inward in his direction, catching that sweet spot at just the right angle.

He was kissing you as you moaned appreciatively in his mouth. His hands were quite literally magical.

His fingers finally sped up, his thumb focusing all its attention on your clit. You could feel your release quickly approaching and you were ready to succumb to it. You wanted Spencer Reid to make you cum so hard you’d be begging for more.

He did just that.

Your high hit you as you released on his fingers. Your eyes screwed shut, your head banging against the wall. You actually think you stopped breathing for a short second before air rushed back into your lungs and you released a long moan.

“Oh my god, Spencer,” you groaned, reaching for the waistband of his pants.

He’d given you one hell of an orgasm and here you were, ready to beg for more. Especially if they came while he was buried to the hilt inside you.

“That was hot as hell,” he muttered, kissing you again, “It’s sexy seeing you spend all your energy on an orgasm instead of yelling at me. It’s healthier for your body, too.”

He smirked, his teeth pulling on your lower lip gently before pulling away. His hands were working with yours to push his pants down and his boxers too.

“Are you willing to admit you want me to fuck you against this wall now?” he growled.

“Yes, yes. Fuck yes, please.”

Man, if he wanted you to be his bitch ages ago, he probably should’ve just fucked you. One orgasm at his hands and you had turned into a writhing, begging and moaning heap.

But still, you couldn’t help but wonder if he could make you feel so good with his hands, that it would most likely be ten times as amazing with his dick.

He lifted you up, holding you against the wall. You wrapped your legs around his waist as he pushed into you. You felt yourself stretching in ways you hadn’t felt in a long time and you couldn’t hold it back; a long, low moan of gratification left your lips.You hated to admit it, but he felt fucking fantastic inside of you.

By his own confirming groan, you could tell he felt the same way as you. At the back of your mind you couldn’t help but wonder why this hadn’t happened years ago. 

His hips rocked against yours, slowly at first as his mouth found yours. He was as ravenous for you as you were for him. 

Your fingers dug into his back as his thrusts became faster and harder. He was quite literally fucking you into this metal wall and you were loving every second of it.

Your emitted moans were coming every few seconds with every slap of your skin against his. His own grunts and groans came from deep in his throat, making you even hotter.

“S-Spencer,” you stuttered, pulling his face back to yours.

You have him a brief kiss before smirking up at him.

“I’m the spoiled little brat that’s got you moaning like a little bitch,” you panted.

Your words made him groan as he gripped your sides. He must have excellent control because he managed to get a hold of himself, slowing his hips to where he was tantalizingly pulling out of you and pushing back in.

“Still hate me, Y/N?”

“Right now, yes,” you groaned, trying to pull him deeper within you, wanting the previous speed and depth back.

“Now?”

“Ye- ahhh,” a breathy moan came from you as he resumed his harsher and faster thrusts.

“I don’t hate you,” you groaned, lost in the pleasure he was giving you.

Maybe voiced thoughts during sex were the truth because you actually didn’t hate him. Especially right now.

“Fuck, Y/N, yes baby,” he groaned.

He was close to his peak, you could tell. His fingers were on your clit, circling furiously. He was going to make sure you got your orgasm, before he got his. Who knew he was actually so decent?

Your whimpers, moans and groans were rising in pitch. You halfway hoped no one could hear, but at the same time didn’t care. Let the whole building hear.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck. Spencer, I’m coming, I’m-”

With that, the coil of pleasure that had been building up snapped like a broken rubber band, shooting through your entire body. 

You may have screeched too, you’re not entirely sure. You were completely lost to the bliss of your orgasm and even more so when he came apart not long after you. If you had thought he was attractive before, he was a hundred times more sexy when he was orgasming above you, all caused by you.

Your movements slowed, your chests both heaving. He held onto you carefully, as if he was afraid to set you down just yet. Probably a good idea considering you felt like you’d lost all function in your legs.

You laughed incredulously, unable to believe what had just happened. That had simultaneously been the craziest yet hottest thing you’d ever done.

Spencer’s smirk was replaced with a more shy, happy smile. It was a better look than the scowl he’d worn for you for so long.

It was like the moment that first orgasm hit you, all the anger, all the hatred, all the negative feelings you’d felt towards him drained from your body. You didn’t have the willpower or the desire to hate him anymore. Not that you ever really had.

“I meant what I said,” you said quietly.

“What’s that? You said a lot of things,” he chuckled.

“That I don’t hate you.”

He took a few moments in silence, parting from you and gently setting your feet on the floor again. He took his time getting decent again, as well. You worried at your bottom lip as you did the same, nervous that you’d said the wrong thing.

“So I was right? About the defensive mechanism and everything?”

“Yeah,” you nodded somberly, “I horribly misjudged you; thinking you were stuck up, full of yourself, better than anyone else, the kind of guy that was like all the others and in love with my sister.”

“If anything, I would think what just happened would prove more than anything that my sights are set on you.”

He had a point.

“Why did you hate me though?”

“I was thrown off by your reaction to me. I thought you were a self entitled, spoiled brat and that you thought you were better than me. Seems like we both vastly misjudged one another.”

“It’s kinda a good thing though,” you said.

Spencer looked at you, baffled.

“It is?”

“Well yeah, cause if none of that happened then that wouldn’t have happened either,” you gestured to the place where moments before the two of you had been a tangle of limbs.

“Good point,” he chuckled.

“Uh, Spencer?”

“Hmm?” he looked at you, eyebrows raised.

“You might want to get the elevator moving again.”

“Oh! Right.”

He laughed, hitting the emergency button to restart the elevator.

“I apologize for giving you so much grief though. I’d do anything to make it up to you,” you said.

“How about letting me take you out then? You’re still here for a few more days, aren’t you?” he asked.

You smiled.

“I think I can make all the time in my schedule for you, Spencer.”

His answering smile was enough to make you smile in return.

Oddly enough, the elevator had gone down and back up without stopping, returning to the floor the BAU was on.

“That’s weird,” Spencer mumbled.

The doors parted to JJ waiting to get on.

“Hey, what are you guys still doing here? I thought you left an hour ago.”

Huh, so it’d been an hour. 

She got on the elevator, standing between the two of you.

“Elevator issues,” Spencer answered, before you could think of what to say.

“So you’ve been stuck in the elevator together this entire time?” JJ asked.

“Yup,” you answered.

“I guess it’s a miracle you two didn’t tear each other apart then,” she muttered, hitting the button for the ground floor.

Yeah, there might’ve been some tearing involved.

Behind her back, you and Spencer shared a secret smile.

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[skipps-writes-for-gojo-satoru]

I have something very important to tell you and 🤔anon, first of all, not only do i agree with every single analysis they posted here, but also to say that i can even relate to some. Being an INTJ i was more than capable of understanding Gojo's character, their analysis only helped even more so now. It's not a surprise at all that he is so misunderstood, i said this many times, and coming from my own experience in real life as an INTJ it's very frustrating but it's just how it is i suppose. Now hear me out, Gojo is emotional, even anon said this and it's true, INTJs and ENTPs are not incapable of love, this is what i saw alot of people point out, refering to us as robots. No, this is not true and it's very rude to even think like this. Yes i know that we a ruled more by logical thinking than emotional, but these emotions to us, they are so valuable and so special that we reserve them. Reserve them for those we find closest to our hearts and our minds, someone we trust wholeheartedly, someone we CAN let our emotional guard down around. We are NOT incapable. And Gojo is not an exception here, he is extremely complex, extremely misunderstood, he too favours using logic over emotions, but he has no one close to him, no one that understands him. The only person that came closest to doing so was Geto, and now he's gone. Gojo is so lonely, so touch starved, but he doesn't show, why? Because he has no one to show it to, and this is very heartbreaking and sad. I relate alot to this kind of thinking and behaviour, i am not afraid to be affectionate and caring, but there's gotta be someone to understand first, someone i know i can trust completely like i said. I am not saying emotions and feelings are weakness, no not even close, they are what makes us human, but the thing is, we find them so special and reserved, they to us are something that takes time and patience to let out. But when we do, it's simply the most amazing thing ever, it's so worth it, for both sides. And this is also why the type of woman Gojo would fall for is so rare, but this rarity is what makes it all the more worthwhile and beautiful. They would balance each other out and yes i also agree with anon that she would definitely be a girl version of Geto, more affectionate and patient, understanding, willing to debate with Gojo, call him out on his bs but also teach him, show him that it's a nice feeling showing you care on a deeper level. Someone with whom he can build a better world, even before the romantic relationship, someone who will not betray him, prove to stay by his side and enjoy his silly antics. This is when Gojo will accept his feelings because he knows, ENTPs do not commit to just anyone no way, they know, they sense when they see a person they can rely on and share their life with, they want to build! Build together with this person, it's how they are, and then they'll be sure of their desicion, they'll readily accept their feelings because they know this person is worthy and this is someone they CAN let their emotional guard down and vulnerability. A person that is willing to also share ideas, thoughts, plans and whatnot with them. It's really sad how alot of people quickly rushed and judged Gojo, again we do not judge a book by it's cover. You don't know what's inside the heart until they willingly open it up to you, maybe then they'll have a better understanding. And now to the final point here, i've been sharing my art with you because this is another way of how i show appreciation to something i love, like, this is also another way of me pouring out my emotions, on a simple piece of paper. Again, we are NOT emotionless robots, we are capable of affection and love, we just want to be understood first. Then we will also understand others. And don't worry Skipps, i definitely plan to draw more for you, Gojo deserves all the love he can get so he will get it from us if nothing else!

Thanks for taking your time to read~ 🥰            

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH you couldn't have explained it any other way omg that was so heart touching. I literally felt the emotions behind your words. That was beautifully written and I couldn't agree more with what you said! I'm sobbing I want Gojo to find that special someone you literally described his soulmate I JUST WANT TO SHOWER HIM IN LOVE I'll freakin yeet who dares call you robots

And thank you so much for your beautiful art I absolutely love them just seeing Gojo being loved makes my heart melt in happiness how you're able to pour those emotions onto paper ahhhh YOURE AMAZING ASJKHGF ❤❤❤ OHHH IM SO EXCITED FOR YOUR NEXT ART 😍

#@melonnbar #jujutsu kaisen fanart #gojou satoru #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen gojo #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk gojo #gojou satoru x reader #gojo satoru #gojo satoru x reader #jjk imagines #skipps chat #submission