#The Best Laugh in Cinematic History

[twitchyrose]

RIP Ray Liotta

#The Best Laugh in Cinematic History #Ray Liotta #RIP

[balioc]

Thoughts on the Barbie Movie

Hoo boy. Here we go.

This is long. Spoilers abound.

I

The movie is not, in any normal sense, a Barbie movie (like this or this or this or whatever). It is not a story of Barbie doing the kinds of things that Barbie does in stories. It is an endlessly postmodern and self-referential movie about Barbie, which is to say, about the Barbie franchise and its role in culture. Which is, at least plausibly, an interesting thing for a movie to be.

You probably knew all that already. But it does give us a baseline of "this movie kind of had to be political and discourse-y, one way or another." Or even, to be more specific: "to some large extent this movie had to be about feminism, explicitly, if it was going to exist at all." How could you talk meaningfully about Barbie's role in culture without touching on that stuff?

II

The evaluative TLDR:

Barbie is very ambitious, and in many places very fun. It is also deeply confused, and fragmented, about what it's trying to say and do. Often it raises genuinely interested problems/scenarios and then totally fails to address them, or else addresses them in ways that are incoherent. The text knows that it's doing this, and on several occasions kind of apologizes for it; a couple of times it more or less looks into the camera and says "sorry, we're not going to deal with this properly;" but, well, that's not a substitute for dealing with things properly.

There is also a streak of genuine political nastiness running through the film, in a place where the story really cannot afford it. It...doesn't match up, tonally or thematically, with some of the surrounding material. I have no background at all in cinematic stratigraphy, but I would be fascinated to learn about Barbie's editorial history, because I have the vague sense that a more-cogent (and more-interesting) story got hacked apart and then Frankensteined together into something much cheaper and worse.

III

The opening sequence of the movie is wild. You've seen most of it -- or you can, if you haven't, and you want to -- because it is the film's first teaser trailer. Girls are playing listlessly with baby dolls; a giant Barbie appears like the monolith from 2001: A Space Odyssey; and then the girls enter a frenzy of destruction, bashing their baby dolls' heads against the ground.

I don't know whether I would have found it as disturbing as I did, if I didn't actually have a baby of my own. But speaking from the standpoint of a parent...yeah, wow, it's more viscerally horrific than most actual horror I've seen recently. The narration says some stuff about Barbie providing a new and more rewarding set of imagination games to play, but the visuals by themselves tell a message loud and clear, which is: Barbie will turn your daughters into infanticidal maenads. It wouldn't need any editing at all to be part of a shock-you-silly Reefer-Madness-y moral panic film.

Which is really good! And really interesting! It starts us off on an undeniable thematic note: there is something primal and powerful and very dangerous about Barbie.

IV

The very best part of the movie is probably the part that comes right after the opening, when we explore the movie's depiction of "Barbieland" by going through Barbie's Typical Day, before we get into any of the notional plot or metaphysics. It's joyful and charming in a consistent way. The gags are (mostly) great. The movie is in love with its base premise, and that love is palpable.

This sequence makes one thing very clear:

Barbie treats Ken like absolute dogshit. She is a bad girlfriend.

And it's taken seriously. I mean, it's played for laughs, almost everything in this movie is played for laughs, but...it's not mean-spirited, not here. It's not, like, "ha ha, Ken, what a contemptible loser." He's Pierrot, asking for very basic forms of affection and attention and respect, and getting the door slammed in his face over and over. It's honestly kind of heartbreaking.

That colors everything that comes later.

The movie doesn't forget this, or fail to acknowledge it. At the end, after everything, Barbie does apologize to Ken for her treatment of him. It's a halfhearted and supremely unsatisfying kind of apology, especially in context, but...it's there, in so many words! I'm not making it up! This thematic foundation was laid down, not-very-subtly, right at the beginning!

V

This movie, which is at least trying to be ambitious, is juggling a million themes. Many of them are dumb at their core, and have no real promise; many of them lack any kind of narrative synergy with the others. But there are at least two which, I believe, (a) are genuinely worthwhile individually and (b) work well together in a story.

One is: What does it mean to be a symbol rather than a person? To exist, not for your own sake, but for the sake of influencing the dreams and culture of entities that you don't know and can't really understand?

The other is: What is the proper ordering of the relationship between Barbie and Ken?

I've seen a number of Takes in which people say, essentially: Couldn't this have ended with the Barbies and the Kens just being decent to each other and treating each other like humans? Couldn't there have been equality and mutual respect, instead of the weird uncomfortable girlboss-supremacist stuff that we got? And I sympathize with that impulse tremendously, but the honest answer has to be: No. We cannot have simple equality and esteem between Barbie and Ken, not in a movie like this. That would be a lie. Because this is a movie about Barbie-as-symbol, and when you're looking at Barbie through that lens, it is true and unavoidable that Ken is an appendage and an afterthought. You can have toys for boys; you can have dolls for boys (even if you call them "action figures" or whatever); for that matter, you can have dolls of boys for girls, so that girls can tell stories centering on male characters; but that's not what Ken is, and never has been. There are no Ken stories, and no one particularly wants them. Ken exists to be Barbie's boyfriend.

(One of the most painful moments of the movie comes during the resolution wrapup. Ken wails to Barbie that he has no identity outside her. She says, basically, "you have to find one, because I'm leaving you." And he...acts like he's had an epiphany, and does a little silly celebration. But his "insight" is just literally "I'm Ken," there's absolutely nothing there, and of course it's the most hollow and awful thing in the world because he really does have no identity outside her.)

VI

The movie's metaphysics are not even slightly consistent. The nature of Barbieland, and the ways that it affects and is affected by the real world, are completely different in every scene. In large part because the film can't ever pass up a gag, whether or not it's funny, no matter how much damage it does to the narrative and the theming overall.

The worst part is that the movie is not capable of saying anything remotely coherent about the real world, because its version of the "real world" is as weird and fake as its Barbieland. Will Ferrell's CEO of Mattel character is more of an absurd cartoon than any of the Barbies or Kens. Mattel HQ is some kind of surreal labyrinth tower out of The Matrix. A random receptionist can handle herself like James Bond in a car chase, for reasons that are [handwaved in a gag].

VII

So. Yes. There is the sequence in the third act where Ken takes over Barbieland with the power of patriarchy. This is pretty much as bad as it can be. And I say this as someone who thinks that the movie probably did actually need a plot thread doing roughly that kind of thing.

Almost as bad as it can be. The wannabe-patriarch Kens are gleefully goofy in a way that you can't help but love, or at least, I couldn't help but love it. Which has something to do with the writing and something to do with the charisma of all the Ken actors. The main Ken, Ryan Gosling's Ken, really seems to believe that being a successful patriarch has a lot to do with riding majestic horses and wearing a giant fur coat without a shirt, and when he takes over Barbie's Dream House he names it Ken's Mojo Dojo Casa House -- that kind of thing.

But. Apart from that, it's real unfortunate. The justification for Ken's ability to conquer Barbieland with patriarchy, instantly and effortlessly, is -- in almost so many words -- they had no defenses against it, it was like the American Indians encountering smallpox. I...don't think I need to spell out the problems with that.

Worse yet, the whole sequence is soaked in, uh, let's call it "2014-era upper-middle-class social-status-oriented feminism." The real bad behavior on the part of the Kens, the stuff they do when they're not being adorably weird, is: mansplaining their extensive opinions about cars and movies, and wanting to show off how helpful and knowledgeable they are to "damsels" who are having trouble using machines or computers. Apparently that's the real problem at hand, the causus belli of the gender wars. The way that you deprogram a patriarchy-brainwashed Barbie is by...ranting to her about the stereotypical social irritations of upper-middle-class women (e.g. "you have to keep yourself thin but not act like you care about being thin," "you have to be a confident leader but also be nurturing and supportive," etc.) [note that the Barbies of Barbieland have never encountered these irritations, at least not at the hands of men]. And the girlboss victory montage consists of having the Barbies put on deceptive manipulative bimbo acts to stroke the Kens' egos, which sure is one way to depict girlboss feminist victory.

But the most unforgivable thing of all is the depiction of the patriarchy-brainwashed Barbies. They're lad-magazine caricatures, endlessly offering their Kens "brewski beers," dressing up as French maids, gazing on in cow-eyed adoration as their Kens mansplain stuff to them.

Barbie does, in fact, have a problematic history with the patriarchy. And it does not look like that.

VIII

@brazenautomaton:

Barbie isn’t someone who had to fight through the patriarchy to be seen as good enough to be an astronaut even though she’s a woman. Barbie’s a fucking astronaut because she’s fucking Barbie of course she’s good enough to be an astronaut.

That is...one aspect of the deep Barbie lore. It is the Barbie-nature that Mattel was trying to push, as far back as my own childhood; it's certainly the Barbie-nature that Mattel is trying to push in this movie. But there is another side to Barbie, even older and even more fundamental than Senator Astronaut Veterinarian Barbie, and you can't make a postmodern movie-about-Barbie without addressing it.

This is Barbie the fashion doll. The Barbie who is an icon of ultra-consumerist teenage girlhood, whose life is defined by her fancy clothes and her fancy car. The Barbie whose most salient traits are her hourglass figure and her long blonde hair and her feet that are always posed to fit into high heels. The Barbie of "math class is tough!" The Barbie who is kinda vapid and shallow and, yes, boy-crazy.

How can you tell a story about Barbie wrestling with the culture of patriarchy, and not talk about that? How can you depict Barbie falling victim to the patriarchy and have it look nothing like that?

...the movie does bring up the specter of Vapid Consumerist Barbie, briefly. When Margot Robbie's Barbie first comes to the real world and meets with the sullen teenage daughter character, she has a litany of That Thing thrown in her face, and it makes her sad. But nothing is ever done with it, and it goes nowhere.

IX

And it could all have fit together so well. That's the hell of it.

You can imagine the version of the story in which Ken conquers Barbieland with patriarchy, because the Barbies are actually vulnerable to patriarchal narratives, because Vapid Consumerist Barbie is the chthonic serpent that gnaws at the foundations of Senator Astronaut Veterinarian Barbie civilization. He successfully makes them all forget that they're senators and astronauts and veterinarians, and turns them into airheaded teenage fashionistas who think that math class is tough.

And this avails him, and the other Kens, nothing. Even within the "patriarchal" version of Barbieland, Ken is still an afterthought and an appendage. He still gets treated like dogshit, just in a different idiom.

Because the thing that has always been true of Barbie, though every age and every phase of her mythos, is: she is the main character of her own story.

This is what the movie was telling us all the way back in the horrific 2001-pastiche prologue, right? Even when Barbie was just a swimsuit model, the point was that she let girls tell stories about themselves (or idealized/aspirational versions of themselves), not about boys or babies. That is a truer, and more powerful, feminist message about the meaning of Barbie than any message the movie actually bothers conveying.

The gag scene practically writes itself: the brainwashed Barbies are sitting around in a giggly slumber-party huddle talking about how dreamy Ken is, and actual Ken cannot get a word in edgewise, he can't even get them to notice he's there, because even Vapid Consumerist Barbie is fundamentally centered in her own life. Her narrative is not about a boy, it's about the experience of being a girl (mostly engaging with other girls) who likes thinking and talking about boys. Which is very much beside the point, if you started out with the complaint that your girlfriend never paid any attention to you.

Patriarchy hurts men too, indeed.

X

The movie ends, as I've intimated, in a disappointing squidge of thematic confusion. Barbie announces that she never really loved Ken, and leaves him, because...well, because these days the smart-set target audience is allergic to romantic narratives that Produce the Couple, as far as I can tell. Then she goes to the real world and becomes a real girl, a move that means nothing and is nonsensical even by the standards of the Barbie metaphysics, because the storytellers don't know how to end her arc and Becoming a Real Girl is the sort of thing that feels like a meaningful conclusion.

The Kens...sigh...the Kens ask for equal rights in Barbieland, more or less, and get told, "nah, but we'll throw you some bones." And they're happy with this, more or less, because they're dumb and don't really care. The narrator says, approximately, "maybe someday they'll make as much progress as women have in the real world." Haw haw.

It's probably too much to hope for a movie like this to be willing to say something substantive about responsibility and kindness in relationships. It's almost certainly too much to hope for a movie like this to be willing to say something about the nature of love symbols and love narratives. But all the pieces really were there, laid out very conspicuously. The movie could have wrapped up with: Ken doesn't need to be more important than Barbie, he doesn't even need to be as important as Barbie, he just needs to be treated with human decency. And if little girls are going to play with Barbies, and fantasize about having cute guys hanging all over them -- maybe they should have functional models of romance and human connection in which to root their fantasies, and not terrible ones.

#media analysis #barbie

[ruuinxs]

just got back from the Wonka movie needless to say best two hours of my life, never seen anything like it, if i had to be locked in a room for eternity watching only one thing it would be that movie over and over and over again, 10/10, cried, yelled, sobbed, screamed, laughed, died, best film in cinematic history ever

#AH. #willy wonka #wonka 2023 #wonka movie #Wonka #graph rambles

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - No Thoughts Only Bed Friends

March 2023 Wk 3

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs. Organized by which ones (in each category) I’m enjoying most.

Ongoing Series - Thai

Bed Friend (Sat YT, GaGa & iQIYI uncut) ep 5 of 8 - Consent King is great. The nail clipping injury thing was absurd. I love King’s admission that he’s attracted to Uea’s cool aloof meanness. Also I like that office politics and nepotism have come in to play, this is an office romance after all. King’s “back the fuck off” expression is one of the best. And then there are bits of the friendship/work dynamics that are laugh out loud funny. This is a great show. 

A Boss and a Babe (Fri YouTube) ep 3 of 12 - I honestly can’t decide about the babe character. Do I like him or is he too much an idiot? There is a way to play innocence where it’s cheeky not frustrating, but this is edging on frustrating. Mr Boss is a hard core flirt. What is this I feel? Just… old fashioned trope exhaustion. I HATE the younger brother character but love the home family. All in all, this show still makes me smile, not sure why, but it keeps me watching.  

Tin Tam Jai (Tues Gaga & iQIYI) ep 3 of 12 - Continues to be slice of life sweet and somewhat silly. Second lead syndrome strikes... and then vanishes. 

Pastsenger (Thai Weds Gaga) 2 of 12 eps - I just don’t like any of the characters. They’re boring. Also we are back to that old pulp mistake of not matching foundation properly and not blending at the jaw line. Which I find endlessly distracting. I do like that the sunshine idiot time traveller is trying to take care of his dead bestie’s kid and said kid is hella gay for it. 

The Promise (Thai Weds YT) ep 3 of 10 - I’m bored. 

Chains of Heart (Sat iQIYI) ep 5 of 10 - A confession is not an excuse. Do we trust Leu or not? Now a random doctor character has shown up? It feels like we are watching the whole thing out of sequence, not just the flashbacks but as if the story hasn’t been edited together properly. what is going on? 

Our Winter (Thai & Korea YT & TikTok under ThaiMiniSeries) ep 12-13 of 14 - whatever. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Our Dating Sim (Korea Thurs Viki) eps 3-4 of 8 - I can’t. It’s so good. They’re so good... and so bad at flirting. And SO into each other. The saddest part of my week is reading the phrase “the next episode will not be available for 7 days.”

All the Liquors (Korea Thurs Gaga & Viki) eps 5-6 of 8 - That’s it, that’s the reason? The chef is allergic to alcohol? I don’t understand, why such a big deal? What happened to that plot point? Why did he change his mind? OK, I guess that is the end of that conflict? Now we’re in it just for a cute romcom? Fine. Who needs story structure? Especially when they have a date that is all about tasting local food and baby boy has a cute striped sweater with extra long flappity-flappy sleeves. The credit extras sequence was GREAT! I found the two gay boys expressions over the hets flirting = one if the most relatable moments in BL cinematic history.  

Unintentional Love Story (Korea Fri iQIYI) 1-2 of 10- Ji Won Young is intent on winning over the heart of Yoon Tae Joon as he's the boss's favorite artist. Plot: evil corporation is evil, artist is DEEP and not evil. Opens with a wrongful termination, debt issues, bird poop, & broken plate = our poor sunshine cutie can’t catch a break. Gongchan (maknae of B1A4) is GREAT in this role. Like really good. The tsundere ceramicist better be in hiding for a DAMN good reason. I don’t wan’t to be in another Liquors sitch. Meanwhile: “just a little kabedon to see if you’re gay“ really? That’s your excuse? Love the cafe owner & combative foodie romance boys, side dish syndrome coming on strong already. (The guy playing the muscled waiter is the lead from You Make Me Dance). [FYI I had to search on Google to find it on iqiyi, for some reason they weren’t listing the first 2 eps internally: Ep 1, Ep 2]

A Shoulder to Cry On (Korea Tues Viki & Gaga) eps 1-2 of 7 - Adaptation of Dongmul's manwha, high school set, features a teasing confident gay, and a rich/poor pairing. Star idols Jaehan & Yechan BOTH from OMEGA X, a first for the industry. AND..... I don’t like it. Very bully romance, without the mature teasing of Semantic Error or the kinky hotness of My Beautiful Man. I HATE outing with false accusations (implication = to be gay is evil), aided and abetted by adults. (It’s as close to a trigger as I get.) It makes for an unforgivable bad-boy character. Lots of the “crash into me“ trope. (Who do they think they are? Taiwan?) I’ll keep watching but I’m not happy about it, and I don’t see how they can possibly redeem the bad boy - tragic past or no. Now that he switched to flirting the dynamic is better, but I will never trust him. 

Jack o’Frost (Japan Fri GaGa) ep 5 of 6 - Honestly? Perhaps their relationship should end. Why do I care? They seem ill suited. 

It’s Airing But ...

Love Syndrome (Thai Sat WeTV) stopped at ep 2 of 12 - I’m just not into any aspect of it (except Lee Long Shi and I can watch him in Tin Tem Jai) - saving to binge if the end is solid.

Blue Sky Complex (Japan ???) 5 eps for VR - Kei Ichikawa's manga is getting a JBL adaptation. Weird distribution though, it started Feb 27 sequentially on 360 Channel (SHOCHIKUch) a VR video distribution service. Will inter-fans ever get to see this, and if it’s filmed for VR will it adapt without being overly dark and fuzzy? I have questions. But as usual, you do you Japan and we will wait (im)patiently to see if you remember the rest of the world exists. This is my preferred kind of live action yaoi, so fingers crossed.

Boyband (Thai) ep 2 of 10 - Stopped airing on YouTube, and only available in Thailand & Japan. Not sure if they’re working a distribution deal or just fucking with us.

Cafe In Love (Thai ???) 10 eps on Ch3+ - Thai pulp, about trying to save a coffee shop. FairyGodBLer came through for me, but I’m collecting to binge just in case. It’s my new policy with the grey stuff.

Destiny Seeker (Tues WeTV Thailand) 10 eps - it’s not on any WeTV I can get ahold of. Bad Buddy the pulp rebirth meets Japanese handsome host club action. Same as above.

Heesu In Class 2 (Korea Thurs unknown, I check Viki Gaga iQIYI & WeTV nada) - A gay(er) version of Sex Education. I’m still not sure this one is actually happening.

In case you missed it

I’m putting this here because I missed it: Ready?

Laos produced their version of Boys Over Flowers called Oh My 4. It is... not very good BUT 2 of the F4 have a BL arc with each other!!! (The bad boy and the musician.) You know I’ve been wanting the all gay BoF for YEARS but this is as close as we’ve gotten. Don’t ask, I have no idea how to get it all. But some of it is on YT. 

Next Week Looks Like This:

Liquors & Jack both end. 

Tomorrow: Future (Thai Sun YouTube & Gaga) ep 1 of 5 - Based on a y-novel by Faddest (En of Love) about an engineering student and a dentist. We can expect this one to be soft, it’s from the 21 Day Theory people.

3/22: Make a Wish (Thai Weds YouTube) from WaGa Creative staring Fluke Natouch (OhmFluke UWMA etc...) & Judo (The Miracle Of Teddy Bear) in a medical-fantasy. It seems to be a light-hearted romance with a comedic flair. About a doctor who sees ghosts and a deity who resides in a Bodhi tree that earns merits whenever he fulfills a wish based on a y-novel by Sammon (Manner of Death, Triage). 

Full list of upcoming in March 2023 is here.

2023 forthcoming BL master post. (see comments, some are inaccurate, NOT KEPT UPDATED)

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENT

Definitely Top 10 MINE glares (Bed Friend). 

(last week)

Current Kpop earworm? Team B cover of Dang Dang Dang. Look the tiny corner of my heart not occupied by BL is entire taken over by Peak Time. 

#this week in BL #bl news #BL gossip #upcoming BL #best BL #new BL #BL reviews #Thai BL #korean bl #Taiwanese BL #Japanese BL #live action yaoi #Rakutan Viki #gagaoolala #GMMTV #Kpop earworm #Dang Dang Dang #Peak Time #Bed Friend #A Boss and a Babe #Tin Tam Jai #Pastsenger #Chains of Heart #Our Dating Sim #All the Liquors #You Make Me Dance #Unintentional Love Story #A Shoulder to Cry On #Jack o’Frost #Boys Over Flowers

[tierneysodegaard]

Hollywood - Max Verstappen x Reader

Max Verstappen x female!reader

Requested? Yes/No

Anon: Hi! I love Dog Days sooo much! I'm blown away by your writing and this is story is such a comfort to me. I'm not sure if you're taking any request but I'm hoping you can write another Max x OC. The reader is Max's biggest celebrity crush and they meet for the first time at Monaco/Miami GP. He's all shy & flustered but he manages to take the reader around the track during the hot laps. They get ask about each other in interviews/talk shows. A lot of shipping & happy ending? Thank you in advance❤️

Word Count: 3.7K

Warnings: Fluff, swearing, sexual innuendos, Christian Horner, far from home spoilers

—

Becoming Spiderwoman was a dream come true. It was finally the big break you had worked hard for. Being Spiderwoman had its perks, many A-listers would happily slide their way into your DMS hoping they’d get a reply and you’d go on a date with them, sure a few of them were hot and definitely grabbed your attention but looks would only go so far. So many of them would have similar lifestyles to you and things like that could get boring besides, if you force something it never turns out well. 

Your love life seemed bleak well… that was until a Formula one driver announced that he had a crush on you. 

Max Verstappen had been doing some press work with his teammate Sergio Perez when one of the questions asked the pair of you who their celebrity crushes were and Max said that you were. Since that the internet took off a little. You couldn’t scroll through your Instagram timeline without seeing someone make an edit of you and Max or talking about the pair of you despite the two of you never actually meeting. 

All these events led you to now. You and your co-star, Tom Holland, were currently in Miami doing some press for the next upcoming Spiderman film. The pair of you were shooting a Q&A for GQ. Thankfully you and Tom got on like a house on fire. As you were new to the industry Tom would always look out for you, sort of acting like an older brother.

“Hello, I’m Tom Holland!”

“And I’m y/n y/l/n!”

“And we are answering fan questions for GQ.” Tom smiled as he took out a piece of crumpled paper from the pot on the table which contained the questions. “Okay so… if you could take three people to dinner, dead or alive, who would you pick?” He smiled to you as you pondered at the thought. 

“Hmm, I’d have to say, Freddie Mercury,  Carrie Fisher and… I’m gonna say Maggie Smith.”

“Those are good choices.” Tom smiled. 

“Who would you take?”

“It’s hard to pick just three, I’ve met a lot of people I’d want to take to dinner, probably Obama, Lewis Hamilton and Heung Min Son.” He smiled proudly at his answers as you moved on to the next question. 

“Favourite scene you’ve ever filmed in any film or television show?” 

“These are good questions.” Tom smiled, leaning back in his chair. “Probably the scene where all three Peters met one another.”

“Arguably one of the best scenes in cinematic history.” 

“You think so?” Tom smirked. 

“Everyone in the cinema was clapping when it happened.” You smiled at the Brit. 

“What about you?”

“First first scene where I ever wore my suit, finally felt like I made it then.” Tom’s smirk grew to a smile at your words. 

“How sweet.” You could tell Tom was mocking you slightly, never in an ill-intent way more in a childish way. “Next one.” He dived his hand in before laughing. “Oh you’ll love this one, who is your celebrity crush?” 

“Well we all know yours.” 

“And I know yours.” Tom acted like a child on Christmas morning, swinging back and forth on his chair. 

“Well I don’t have just one -”

“But I know who fancies you.” His smile got wider. “Max Verstappen! And you fancy him back!”

“Wouldn’t say I fancy the bloke I’ve never met him although, there is something about how he looks post-race, helmet hair Max is something I could look at for hours.” Tom burst into laughter. 

“Has he ever slid into yout Dm’s?”

“He has not but he does follow me.”

“Come on Max,” Tom looked straight at the camera. “If you can drive around a car that fast then you should have the guts to dm her.” 

Well ever since that interview the internet went wild. The edits started becoming more and more frequent, more fans were talking about the pair of you and at that time you honestly thought it was just a bit of fun, Max would like a few of your Instagram posts and maybe comment on a few and you’d do a same. Nothing went further, that was until Red Bull invited you and Tom to the race in Miami. 

When Max found out he’d never been so nervous in his life, not even when he drove the final lap to win his championship. You were set to turn up any minute now alongside Tom Holland and he knew he had to drive the race of his life today after all, he wanted to impress you right? 

“I’ll be your wingman.” Tom opened the door of the car for you, allowing you to climb out. 

“If you’re my wingman I won’t ever get to kiss Max Verstappen.” The pair of you walked over to a Red Bull employee who was taking you around the paddocks and track for the rest of the day.

“Is that your plan?” Tom smirked. “To kiss him?”

“If you get to have your celebrity crush then I think I deserve mine.” You winked as you collected your passes, scanning them past security. 

“That’s why I need to be your wingman, I got mine and I can help you get yours.”

“Believe it or not Tom I can flirt my way through situations without you by my side.” 

“Is that why you’re single and needed me to mention Max in that interview to get here or?” His smirk grew, making you push him lightly as the pair of you laughed at his words. 

Miami was full of celebrities, even Michelle Obama had turned up. You had been watching this sport for years now and never in your life had you seen anything quite like Miami. It was hard to navigate through the paddock let alone the actual garages. Tom extend his arm back so you could hold onto his forearm as you reached the garages, last thing Tom wanted was you to get lost when Max was nearby. 

“And this is Christian Horner, I’m sure the two of you know who he is.” The woman who was taking you on a tour smiled at the man who extended his hand for Tom to take. Tom shook his hand, smiling as the pair said hello to one another. 

Christian turned to you, his arms open as you shared a quick hug. “There’s the woman we don’t stop hearing about.” You laughed at his words. “Not only do my daughters talk about you all the time but so does Max.” Christian turned his head, making eye contact with Max and calling him over. 

Max didn’t know why Christian was suddenly calling over. He was yet to see that you were standing alongside his racing Principle. When he got closer his face dropped at the sight of the woman he’d had a crush on the moment he’d seen her in the Spiderman trailer. 

“Ah Max, finally, I’m sure I don’t need to introduce you to y/n y/l/n, considering you don’t shut up about her.” 

Max went bright red at Christian's words. He kept his gaze firmly on you, trying his best not to stare but he couldn’t help it. The woman he’d spent hours thinking about was standing before him and she was wearing his merchandise. Max could have sworn he’d just died and gone to heaven. Sensing how awkward this could get your wingman decided to step in.

“Christian do you happen to have a bathroom around here?” Tom glanced over at you, a smirk on his lips as he spoke. 

“Ah yes, I’ll show you it.” He smiled, leading Tom off which just left you and Max alone. 

“Hey.” You smiled up at the man, hoping to break the ice between the two of you.

God even your voice was perfect. 

“Hi… H-how are you?” 

“I’m good thank you.” Your smile was bright, the sight made Max’s heart flutter. It was supposed to be a stupid crush yet here he was, already stuttering. “How are you? Nervous for the race?”

He let out a deep breath, letting a small smile escape his lips before he spoke. “I’m okay, you do tend to get used to a few things when you’ve been racing for a while.”

“Oh yeah?” You smirked. “Never nervous about driving cars that could kill you but you stutter over a woman?” 

Being an actress meant it was easy to hide your emotions, including ones like you had for Max. He might have been able to mask his nervousness but you could. Seeing how confident Max was in interviews and online it was amusing to see him crumble under you after just a few words. 

“I - Umm -” He stuttered yet again. You let out a small smile which turned into laughter, your laughter made Max relax slightly. “H- have you been around the track yet?”

“I have not.” You looked him up and down. “Care to show me? If you have time -”

“Yes!” Max may have said a little too loudly. “Yes, I have time.” He flashed a smile. 

“I’ve got an idea.” Christian suddenly came into view. “What about if the pair of you do a hot lap? We’ll set up some cameras and get the pair of you to answer questions. I’m sure if we just tweeted something out now we could get a handful of questions for the pair of you to answer.” Normally questions wouldn’t be asked but Christian had a plan, he knew everyone wanted to know about you and Max so the questions would be interesting. 

“Are you happy to do that, with me?” You turned to Max, silently hoping he’d say yes. 

“Well, I’m not going to let one of the other guys take you away am I?” He gained some confidence before mouthing a ‘thank you’ to Christian as the pair of you left to get ready. 

The Red Bull social media team set up some cameras in the car they planned on using and screenshotted some questions you’d read out to Max as he drove. Christian and Tom made sure the questions had some interesting takes. 

Max handed you a helmet as he opened the sports car door for you. Flashing a smile you thanked him before he joined you. “Nervous?” He asked. 

“Yeah a little.” He laughed at your reply, starting the car up, and allowing the engine to roar. He looked at you as the engine grew louder. “Is that you’re way of trying to make me nervous?”

“Depends how you are with fast cars.” 

“Depends who’s driving it.” You smirked at the man as he held his gaze with yours. Max smirked as he set off the car, catching you entirely off guard. “Max!” You screamed as the car picked up its pace without warning. The Dutch only laughed as you gripped onto the side of the door for support. 

“Come on it’s not that fast -”

“Not that fast?” You yelled as he picked up the pace before drastically slowly down to turn the corner, making you scream at the sudden change. Max couldn’t contain his laughter as he drove. 

“You need to ask the questions.” Max turned his attention back to the road. 

“Fuck the questions!” 

Max kept laughing, he couldn’t believe this confident woman he’d met only minutes ago who was so confident around him was now screaming and holding onto the car like she was going to die. “Just start with the first one.”

You pulled up the phone reluctantly. “What is the one thing you like the most about me?”

“You have really pretty eyes.” He turned the corner, making you jerk to the side. You held your arm out for support but the only support you had that wasn’t the door was his arm. You grabbed his arm, the action made Max look down at your hand before his eyes trailed up your body, scanning every inch of you with a sly smile. 

The fans were going to have a field day with that shot. 

“Thank you!” You screamed again as he sped up. “Jesus Max, umm what I like the most about you? You look pretty hot when you’ve finished racing.” It was bold of you to say that to him but you’d already said that on GQ. 

“Next question?”

“If you had to take y/n on a date, where would you take her?” You laughed at the question. 

“Depends.”

“On what?” 

“Well would you want a more expensive date or a relaxed one? We could order in and follow Bob Ross painting tutorials or we could go to the Ritz.”

“Very creative Verstappen.” You looked back at the phone as you read out another question. “Who would win in a staring competition between the two of you.”

“Definitely me.” Max turned his head to look at you, not leaving your gaze as the pair of you stared at one another for a couple of seconds. 

“Max look at the road!” You broke away from his hold, pointing to the road but Max only flickered his gaze forward for a split second before looking back at you. 

“We’re fine.” He smirked, putting his foot down just that inch more making the car speed up. 

“Yeah you are -”

“Do you do your own stunts?” He suddenly asked. 

“Some of them why?”

“What about at the end of the film, you swung across that building and fell but landed on your feet, was that all you?”

“Yeah, I had a harness on so I didn’t die as we were rather high up -”

“Were you scared?” 

“No.”

“So you’re not scared of jumping and swinging around a set that’s high off the ground but you’re scared of me driving fast?”

“I’m not scared you just took me off guard with it -” Max suddenly turned another corner making you grab onto his arm again. “Fucking hell Max.” 

The pair of you had completed the lap but Max wasn’t done there. “How good are you with spinning?” Your eyes widened at his words, knowing exactly what he was going to do. 

“Max no -” Max had already set off, creating doughnuts with the car, he didn’t stop at just one either, he kept going. Maybe it was because he loved the way you held onto his arm to feel safe or because he was able to just have you alone and when he was in a car he felt confident with you. 

Eventually, Max had to stop. His cheeks hurt from the constant laughing. He quickly opened his door, running around the car to open your door. He leaned over you to undo your seatbelt before helping you out of the car. “You okay?” He smiled, reaching up to take your helmet off whilst the two of you were blissfully unaware that your interactions were still being filmed. 

“A little dizzy but hey that was fun.” You smiled back as he removed his own helmet, earning him an interesting gaze from you as you were taken back by his state. 

“Fun? You screamed the whole time.” 

“I scream in the bedroom, doesn’t mean I’m not having fun, maybe if you’re good enough you might hear it too.” You sent him a smirk and just like that, you had made Max Verstappen weak at the knees. Reaching up you placed a kiss on his cheek before walking away from him, leaving a stunned Max Verstappen to blush at your actions.

Max had won in Miami and needless to say the after-party was an experience. You woke up the next morning to a flood of ship edits and posts of you and Max. The hot laps video came out just after Max had won and fans didn’t need to wait long for more content of the two of you. 

Photos started to circulate of the pair of you at the party. Max had his arms around you as the pair of you danced to the music. You spent your morning scrolling through multiple video edits and photo edits of the two of you. You even liked a few, knowing that would also more than likely set the fans off even more. 

You wished you could have stayed in Miami for longer but you had to fly to London with Tom, the pair of you were set to appear on The Graham Norton show for more interviews. 

“Morning Mrs Verstappen.” Tom smirked as you met him outside your hotel room. “Is Max in there with you?”

“No, he isn’t.” 

“So did the pair of you -”

“No, we didn’t do anything like that.” You huffed, pulling your hoodie closer as the pair of you left to catch your flight. Your phone vibrated in your hand, you looked down to see that Max had Dm’d you. A smile crept across your face at the sight. “Not yet anyway.”

On the plane you were finally able to answer his message. 

Max: Christian told me you were leaving today, have you left yet? X

You: We have, we’re going back to London for press, I’m sorry I didn’t have a chance to say goodbye x

Max: Don’t apologise, are you free on the 25th? X

You: I believe so, how come? X

Max: Will you still be in London then? X

You: Yes x

Max: I wanted to ask you in person but seeing as you’re no longer in Miami I’ll ask you now, would you like to go on a date? As you’re in London we could go to the Ritz? I’ll book everything and if you’re free that weekend would you like to come to Monaco with me for the race? X

You: I’d love to Verstappen x

Max: Thank fuck x

“What’s got you smiling like that?” Tom’s voice grabbed your attention, snapping your head up your smile faded when you realised what he was alluding to. 

“Nothing -”

“He’s messaged you hasn’t he?”

“He -”

“What’s he said?” Tom smirked. “Oh come on y/n you’ve got to tell me -”

“He asked me out on a date, he wanted to ask in person but considering we’re up in the sky that might be rather hard.”

“What did you say?”

“Take a guess.” It was now your time to smirk. 

“Where are the two of you going?”

“The Ritz -”

“Bloody hell he must fancy you, that place is expensive.” 

You arched your brows at his comment. “As if your bank account would be damaged if you went there.” 

“You know if things work out well between the two of you we could all go on a double date.”

“Well I hope they do because I’m going to Monaco with him after.”

“Please use protection I don’t want mini y/n’s running around, one’s bad enough.” Tom smiled as you flipped him off, sinking back into your chair to text Max. 

— 

“y/n I have to ask.” You sat alongside Tom and a few other celebrities as Graham Norton started to interview everyone. He was yet to ask about Max which was surprising considering it was all anyone was talking about currently. “You and Max Verstappen…” The crowd cheered as you broke out into a smile. “Is there anything between the two of you?”

“Well…” Your smile didn’t falter. “I hope so.” The crowd screamed again. “We have a date set up and well… who knows what will happen.”

It wasn’t just you who had been questioned about the two of you. Max had to deal with interviews all year round, thankfully for you, it was only when you had an upcoming project coming out or if you were invited on a talk show out of the blue. He’d said the same, that the two of you were going on a date in the near future. You knew it would be hard to keep your relationship hidden from the public eye as everyone was still very much obsessed with the two of you but the reaction was very positive so maybe the two of you could be the next parents of Hollywood, despite his profession.

You’d managed to survive the endless questions and the constant teasing from Tom who was determined to have your upcoming relationship talked back so maybe the press would back down from his. 

Opening the door to one of the dressing rooms which held your belongings you were met with bright ocean eyes and a mess of brown hair. Standing in the middle of your dressing room was a very tired Max Verstappen who evidently took the first flight he could to London after you’d left. 

“What the hell are you doing here?” You looked down at his hands which had a large bouquet of flowers tightly grasped between them. 

“I - I’ve just realised how weird this must be -” His confidence fell. You warmed to his words, he really did like you. 

“It’s not weird, if anything I’m actually rather impressed you managed to get a flight out here, make yourself look presentable after that hangover you must have gotten last night and pick up flowers.”

“I am very tired.” He let out a breath of relief. 

“Well…” You stepped closer to him, your hands resting above his. “Why don’t you come home with me and this time I’ll drive.” 

“Sounds perfect.” He planted a kiss on your forehead. “I hope you like the flowers too, I wasn’t sure which ones to get so Daniel helped.”

“They’re beautiful Max.” You took them into your hands, admiring how stunning they were before moving one hand to lace into his. “Come on, I’m fucking shattered.” 

Needless to say, the photos of the two of you holding hands as you left the set went down a treat on social media. 

#max vertsappen imagines #f1 imagine #max verstappen imagine #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen one shot #max verstappen #f1 blurb #f1 x reader #f1 x you #f1

[2manythoughtz]

Is Barbie A Joke To Critics?

Just a week ago I wrote an article about the Barbie movie and how it was not only misunderstood but also overlooked when it comes to its deep meaning. We’ve had people like Jo Koy mocking the movie and comparing it to Oppenheimer which is a movie inspired by real events of our past, not only that but the winning song was I’m Just Ken, that alone should show just how little critics care to take what the movie teaches us and use it in the real world.

And we’re back at it. As you know, the nominations for the Oscars have been released. You’d be surprised to see that neither Margot Robbie (the main actress who interpreted Barbie) nor Greta Gerwig (the director of Barbie) got nominated in their categories. Speaking of the directors’ category, Greta is not new to being snubbed by the Oscars, it had already happened with Little Women. The only difference is that in 2020 there were no women nominated as best director, this year we have a female director who’s been nominated and that’s Justine Triet with Anatomy of a Fall, which is not bad. What’s laughable is the fact that Barbie has won the Golden Globes Award for Cinematic and Box Office Achievement and yet its director is not taken seriously.

And we’re not even talking about any film, to this day Barbie has made 1.45 billion U.S. dollars worldwide which makes it the best movie debut for a female director. 

Margot Robbie didn’t get nominated as best actress although her performance as Barbie was absolutely iconic, she really brought Barbie to life in a unique way that not many actresses could’ve achieved. If you thought it couldn’t get any worse, let me tell you that Ryan Gosling (the actor who interpreted Ken) got nominated as Best Supporting Actor. That is fair, Ryan did an amazing job at portraying Ken, he really made his character funny and entertaining, he earned his nomination and I’m sure everyone is happy that he was one of the two nominees for Barbie. 

But fans were not the only ones who were disappointed, Ryan Gosling himself commented on the matter and showed his displeasure. Here are his words:

“I am extremely honored to be nominated by my colleagues alongside such remarkable artists in a year of so many great films. And I never thought l’d being saying this, but I’m also incredibly honored and proud that it’s for portraying a plastic doll named Ken.

But there is no Ken without Barbie, and there is no Barbie movie without Greta Gerwig and Margot Robbie, the two people most responsible for this history-making, globally-celebrated film.

No recognition would be possible for anyone on the film without their talent, grit and genius.

To say that I’m disappointed that they are not nominated in their respective categories would be an understatement.

Against all odds with nothing but a couple of soulless, scantily clad, and thankfully crotchless dolls, they made us laugh, they broke our hearts, they pushed the culture and they made history. Their work should be recognized along with the other very deserving nominees.

Having said that, I am so happy for America Ferrera and the other incredible artists who contributed their talents to making this such a groundbreaking film.”

As Ryan said, the only woman who got nominated is America Ferrera who had an impactful role in the movie, her monologue about women and every hardship that they have to face because of society has become viral. Her character represents women, any women, and she did an outstanding job that earned her the nomination for Best Supporting Actress. The only shame is that she’s the only woman who got the privilege of being nominated for a movie that talks about feminism and how women don’t have the same treatment as men.

The Oscars proved Barbie right once again. 

#let me know your thoughts #movies #series #thoughts #books #celebrities #the barbie movie #barbie #barbie movie #barbie the movie #barbie 2023 #ryan gosling #margot robbie #greta gerwig #little women #oscars #academy awards #oppenheimer #critics choice #awards season #feminism #society #i’m just ken #ken #america ferrera #opinion #actor #actors #actress #jo koy

[litapeanut]

Netflix's Alexander the making of a god: pretty rad actually

My judgement: 8/10

While I'm not a history professional but a humble Alexander-the-great enthusiast, and I must admit I cannot judge the historical accuracy of all bits of information presented in the documentary either, I'm still impressed by the overall production as well as the producers' intention.

Firstly, I appreciate the presentation of a "non-Europe-centric" world at the time of ATG (which is objective since this was a pre-colonialism era, where multiple powerful nations outside of Europe existed, such as ancient Persia, ancient India and ancient China) and ancient Persia is portrayed as a strong rival instead of an uncivilised foreign hostile (I laughed every time the Greeks or Persians refer to each other as "barbarians" because this was how almost every ancient kingdom viewed the others, which is funny from a modern perspective). In the same respect, Darius is given a rationale for his motivation and shown as a worthy opponent.

In regards to acting, to me this series has the most accurate casting choices so far, and even if Buck Braithwaite (the actor portraying Alexander) doesn't deliver the sort of grandiose performance one would expect to be suitable for a figure like ATG, I'm moved by how human and nuanced his version of Alexander feels.

I'm definitely pleased with how truthful the relationship between Alexander and Hephaistion is portrayed, it's probably the very first time in human cinematic history that we see a portrayal like this (confettis!).

Regarding the low ratings, I'm aware that there are primarily two concerns resulting in this: 1) conservatives being deeply upset about Alexander being explicitly bisexual. I disregard such opinion completely since I know it is decidedly conservative which I don't agree with; 2) a neutral concern about the show not offering enough historical facts / not being accurate enough. As mentioned above I'm not a history professional, so as a common viewer I can only "blindly" trust the scholars being consulted.

In fact, I found the ratings of nearly all the ATG cinematic productions to be relatively low, from the 1963 Alexander, to the 2004 Alexander, and to this Netflix production. I understand that people throughout the ages have had mountainous expectation for any portrayal of ATG since he was not only a truly competent ruler but also a cultural legacy. And there's also another layer: even though he had accomplished monumental success as a conquerer, nonetheless his conquering brought wars and suffering to the civilians. Although the geopolitical dynamic then was different from that of now, meaning the countries he conquered were not considered "less developed", still you CANNOT tell the contemporary audience, some of whom are descendants from those conquered countries, who are people of colour, that Alexander's conquering of their countries was a natural result of social Darwinism, that these countries deserved to be conquered and casualty didn't matter – it's insensitive. As a POC myself, in my eyes Alexander was very much a hero of his time who had some greatness that all people can aspire to, but his military exploits are morally debatable according to modern standards (I don't hate him, I almost named my cat after him, I only want to view him as dialectically as possible). In sum, positioning the moral of his story for the post-colonial modern audience is tricky. Therefore, this Netflix documentary is the best reimagination of him, at least in my personal opinion.

#review #long opinion #alexander the great #alexander x hephaestion #netflix #alexander making of a god #documentary #history

[thickhoneybun]

It meant nothing

Summary: y/n is dating Rooster and they live together. After a get together Jake spends the night and kisses y/n.

WC: 1006

Warning: Cussing 

The party had been over for a few hours and now you are laid in bed with Bradley. He is asleep and snoring so loud. Every time he drinks to much and falls asleep it sounds like a freight train in your bed. Kissing him softly on the head you get out of the bed and decide to go eat a snack.

Now in the kitchen you make a plate of peanut butter, bananas, and crackers. You make your way to the living room and turn on Shrek 2 (The best Shrek movie btw). While watching the movie you hear someone walking down the hallway and it is Jake. Jake asked to spend the night because he was a little to drunk and didn't want to drive. He walks in with no shirt on and some sweatpants. "Do you know how to put clothes on?" you ask while turning back to the movie. "I usually sleep naked so be glad I put some pants on.", Jake says while giving you a cocky smirk and sitting down on the couch.

Ya’ll continue to watch the movie and laughed together. "Are you hungry? I can make you a snack or warm up some of the left over BBQ?" Jake smiles at you asking this. He always thought you were so sweet and hates that he didn't ask you out before Bradley did. "Sure, I'll take some of the snack you were eating." he gives you the biggest smile. You get up from the couch and he sees that your sleep shorts have rode up a bit, and he bites his bottom lip. You come back a few minutes later with a plate for him and hand it to him. Sitting down you grab a blanket and draped it over yourself before turning on another movie.

"You're really into this Shrek stuff aren't you?" Jake says while placing a cracker in his mouth. "They are the best movies in Cinematic history!" you both let out a laugh. The other movie ends and you decide it is time to go back to bed. Getting up Jake grabs you by the arm and pulls you in for a kiss. You pull back quickly and place your hand over your mouth. A few moments of silents pass and you finally say, "Don't ever do that again. Why would you think that is okay?" Jake just stares at you. "I am with Bradley and I am extremally happy with him. I'm sorry if I gave you an impression that this was going to be an okay thing to do. I don't want this to ruin ya’ll friendship and my relationship with him. Don't bring this up again. I think its best if we go to bed." After saying this you walk out of the room and go back to the bedroom.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A few weeks have passed and you kept getting text from Jake telling him how sorry he was. You didn't respond to any of them because honestly you didn't know what to say. Bradley had went out to the Hard Deck tonight and you had decided to stay home.

While in the kitchen cleaning up the dishes from the dinner you heard the front door open and slam shut. Looking down at your watch you see its around 11pm and Bradley usually stays till last call. "Roo? Is that you?". Bradley storms around the corner and he looks pissed. "What the fuck y/n? You kiss my best friend and you don't even have the guts to tell me?" You are taken back but what he says. "Bradley I didn't kiss him, he kissed me and I cut that shit off immediately. I told him that it wasn't okay." you feel tears begin to form as you yell back at him. "I just cant fucking believe this! I thought we were good y/n, now I don't know what to think. I'm having a good time with my friends and then Jakes drunk ass decides to tell everyone that ya'll kissed the other night. Do you know how fucking embarrassing that is for me?" Bradley voice is getting louder and louder with every sentence. "I-I'm sorry. I should have told you as soon as it happened. It meant nothing to me and I told him that. I told him I was happy with you and that he needed to loose whatever thought he had of me." tears start to run down your face. Bradley just scoffs and goes to the bedroom and slams the door.

Standing in the kitchen for what fells like hours you finally decide to go to the couch. You grab a blanket and lay down. Turning on the tv you lay there and stare at the screen not really able to focus on anything. Letting out soft sobs while hating yourself for the issues that have been caused. You look at your phone and notice it is now 3am and Bradley has not came out of the room. You have decided that the couch is your bed for the night and you slowly start to drift asleep.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You are woken up from a light tap on your shoulder. Looking up you see Bradley standing in front of you. "Come on baby lets go to bed.", Bradley says while putting his hand out. You sit up and grab his hand while he leads you to the bedroom. Laying down in the bed Bradley crawls in next you and grabs you pulling you to his chest. "I'm sorry I yelled at you. I should have talked to you like an adult y/n." "You don't have to apologize Roo. I should have told you when it happened, I'm sorry for any issues I have caused." Bradley played with your hair before grabbing your chin and nudging you to come closer. He places a soft kiss on your lips and gently tells you, "I love you baby and I don't want Jake being a fucking dumbass to ruin this." "I love you too Bradley."

#bradley rooster bradshaw #rooster imagine #top gun #top gun fandom #rooster #jake seresin #thickhoneybun #fandom #fanfic #bradley bradshaw x reader

[koreanthrillerenjoyer]

the two best laughs in cinematic history are

Michael from the good place when, well iykyk go watch it i can spoil it.

And

Seo inwoo from psychopath diary when he finds out about why dongsik was acting the way he was whilst driving his car.

Absolute iconic moments that desrve more recognision.

#psychopath diary #Seo inwoo #yook dongsik #yoon shi yoon #michael #the good place

[soldier-poet-king]

Thank you for being the only person on my dash I've seen posting about the DnD movie

!!!!!! I took kid brother to see it this weekend and it was a DELIGHT??? Like was it the bestest most cinematic artful movie ever in the history of the world? No. But it WAS FUN and a lil heartwarming story about families and it got all the best parts of playing dnd into movie form in a way that's accessible to non ttrpg players and I think more people should be into it???? It's just??? Yeah sometimes things are just FUN and WHOLESOME and you gotta laugh and enjoy urself without pretensions

#dndhat #genuinely it was just a fun lil romp and im delighted by it

[twistedtummies2]

The Price May Be Right - Number 15

Welcome to “The Price May Be Right!” I’m counting down My Top 31 Favorite Vincent Price Performances & Appearances! The countdown will cover movies, TV productions, and many more forms of media. We’ve reached the Top 15 for this countdown! Today we focus on Number 15: Richelieu, from The Three Musketeers.

Alexandre Dumas’ classic swashbuckling stories of “The Three Musketeers” have been adapted numerous times to the stage and screen. When it comes to movie adaptations, most people agree that the best version is the 1970s Musketeers Trilogy, directed by Richard Lester. However, if there is a cinematic runner-up to the Lester Trilogy of Musketeer movies for the best adaptation, it is undoubtedly the 1948 film from MGM, directed by George Sidney. This Technicolor adventure epic does a most excellent job of telling the rather broad story from Dumas’ novel, condensing the plot down to a length of just over two hours without sacrificing much in the way of characters and intrigue. It also features some of the finest performances ever done by its star-studded cast, including Gene Kelly as the heroic D’Artagnan, Angela Lansbury as Queen Anne, Frank Morgan as King Louis XIII, Lana Turner as Milady De Winter…and Vincent Price as the main villain of the story, Richelieu. In the original book, Richelieu is, of course, Cardinal Richelieu: a controversial historical figure. While most adaptations keep this fact in play, most likely because he WAS a real person, the 1948 film takes liberties with history by making Richelieu the Prime Minister of France. The reason for this was simply the world of filmmaking at the time: there was trepidation about depicting a leading figure of the Catholic Church as the villain of the story in the 1940s, due to religious sympathies and a fear of censorship. While Vincent’s Richelieu may not have the title of Cardinal, this ultimately matters little, since the fictional character of Richelieu remains basically intact. And in works like this, that is what counts most. In many ways, I like to say Richelieu is a Bond Villain who existed before Bond Villains were even a thing. I mean, first of all, just look at the image I chose: that’s basically the Archetypal Bond Villain Pose, courtesy of Blofeld. XD But even in terms of the plot and the role he plays in the story, this character feels like the sort of evil genius a protagonist like 007 would have needed to tackle. He’s a cunning puppet master of a villain; the kind of evil mastermind who lurks in the shadows, pulling the strings. Richelieu does little in terms of direct confrontation with his adversaries, but instead prefers to use his henchmen and the power he has over the state and military to enforce his will. He makes loyal subjects seem like traitors, and hires serial murderers as his lieutenants, all while plotting to take over the kingdom entirely and wage war against his enemies in England. The funniest part is, at the end of the story, Richelieu doesn’t TECHNICALLY lose: while his plans are foiled, his defeat comes at a high cost for the heroes, which makes the ending interesting in its tone. In some ways it’s a happy ending, but in other ways there’s a sort of ambiguity to it. Vincent’s performance is both hammy and understated at the same time. He plays Richelieu with a Satanical charm and equally devilish eloquency. His character is a smarmy, crafty villain, and a master strategist: he seems to know just about everything about his enemies, and even his allies, and is able to out-think them and be two steps ahead at almost every turn. Whenever one scheme fails, he has a backup plan already set up. Anytime D’Artagnan and the other Musketeers think they’ve got Richelieu all figured out, he throws them a curveball that makes them second guess their whole approach. While he never rants or raves, or laughs beyond a chortle, his oily performance definitely carries a thick layer of melodrama to it in the way it is written and framed. There are also elements of empathy to Richelieu, as there are lines even he hesitates to cross in his work, and he can be reasoned with under certain circumstances. He even shows a sense of respect towards his opponents; always a fun quality in an antagonist. This is another role I don’t hear people talk about too often when they discuss Price’s best characters, but it’s definitely worthy of a place in my personal Top 15. Tomorrow, the countdown continues with Number 14!

#the price may be right #top 31 vincent price performances #list #countdown #best #favorites #vincent price #movies #film #literature #the three musketeers #richelieu #number 15 #alexandre dumas #gene kelly #actors #acting

[thehiccupingbanana]

Elle's First Slumber Party

PAIRNING/FANDOM: Tara Jones & Darcy Olsson & Elle Argent (Heartstopper) GENRE: Fluff WORD COUNT: 2,381 WARNINGS: none :) SUMMARY: Based off this comment on this YouTube Reel: "My girlfriend is trans. We had a sleepover a while ago where we did all sorts of stereotypically girly stuff that she wasn't able to do at childhood sleepovers. It was so fun." ADDITIONAL TAGS: Background: Established Tara Jones / Darcy Olsson, squint and miss it reference to imogen / sahar, based off a YouTube comment, i just love the friendship between these three, Friendship, Fluff, references to pre nick / charlie

[READ ON AO3]

Elle walked into her second period classroom, seeing her two best friends at Higgs already sitting at their desk behind Elle’s desk.

“We should watch The Barbie Movie again.” Darcy stated, playing with Tara’s fingers.

“Darce, we’ve watched it seven times since it came out.” Tara sighed, exasperated.

“But it’s so good!” Darcy exclaimed before turning to Elle as she was sitting in her chair, “Elle, do you agree, The Barbie Movie is one of the greatest in cinematic history?” 

Elle chuckled thinking of how Tao would respond if he heard her, before responding, “I haven’t seen it.”

“What?” Darcy and Tara both nearly yelled, before Darcy whispered, “You haven’t seen The Barbie Movie?”

“Well, no.” Elle started, “It’s not exactly on the top of the list of movies Tao would have us watch at movie night. Plus, I haven’t seen any of the other Barbie movies, I wouldn’t know what’s going on in the newest one.”

“One. Tao needs to let you choose a movie next time. Two. It’s not a series. And three. You haven’t seen any of the Barbie movies?” Darcy listed.

“No.” Elle replied, shaking her head, “It’s not exactly something I grew up watching.”

Darcy and Tara both slowly nodded in response before looking at each other for several seconds, appearing to have a silent conversation with each other.

“Do you want to have a slumber party with us this weekend?” Tara asked, “We can watch one of the old Barbie movies and the new one, and we can do each other’s hair and bad makeup, eat a bunch of junk food, and go to sleep at 6am like we would have done as kids.”

Darcy nodded enthusiastically along with Tara’s words, adding, “And eat so much sugar.”

Elle laughed at Darcy’s words before replying, “Yes, okay! That sounds fun!”

“Party!” Darcy cheered, the other girls in the classroom looking her way.

The three girls laughed, ducking their heads together, chatting about what they would do that weekend before the teacher started the class.

~🎉📽💤~

[Charlie, Elle, Issac, & Tao]

Elle: Can’t make movie night this Saturday guys. Sorry!

Tao: Why not?

Elle: Tara and Darcy want to have a slumber party this weekend; we’re going to watch some of the barbie movies. (Charlie & Issac: ❤️)

Tao: The Barbie movies? Really?

Charlie: the new one is really good tao! (Issac: 👆)

Tao: Charlie!

Issac: it is really good.

Tao: Issac! So, it’s just going to be three of us?

Elle: Invite Nick; you can have a boy’s night

Tao: No

[Elle and Tao]

Elle: Why not?

Tao: Charlie needs to get over his straight boy crush, not spend more time with him.

Elle: 🙄 Just tell Charlie to ask Nick, they are friends after all.

Tao: Fine

[Charlie, Elle, Issac, & Tao]

Tao: Fine Charlie invite Nick. (Issac: 👆) But he’s not picking any of the movies.

Elle rolled her eyes at Tao’s last text message before conversation shifted to Charlie being suspiciously quiet in the chat. Elle had a feeling something had happened at Harry’s party Nick invited Charlie to the week before, but until Charlie said anything, it’s not her business to speculate.

~🎉📽💤~

Elle hadn’t been at Tara’s for more than thirty seconds before Darcy was shoving a bowl of “Gummy Salad” which was a bowl of Maynards Sour Patch Kids, Jelly Babies, and Fruit Pastilles, from what Elle could see, into her hands.

“Imogen said she is on her way and Sahar should be here in the next hour or so.” Darcy announced, “It’s not a real slumber party unless it slightly feels like too many people.”

Elle would have to take her word for it. The day before Darcy said that she was going to invite someone named Sahar, who was in one of her classes, and Tara invited Imogen. Elle wasn’t really sure why Tara invited Imogen, if she had to guess, it may have to do with Nick and Imogen being friends. Once again, not speculating.  

“That sounds good.” Elle smiled, “What’s the plan for tonight?”

“Well, if you want to help us finish up the nacho table, that’s what we are doing first!” Darcy cheered, running back into the kitchen.

“She ate the rest of the gummies that didn’t fit in the bowl, so she’s a little wound up.” Tara stated, looking lovingly at her hyperactive girlfriend.

“What is a nacho table?” Elle questioned, following Tara and Darcy into the kitchen.

“She saw this TikTok where people put a bunch of chips, meats, cheese, and veggies on a table.” Tara sighed, “It’s very American, but she wanted to do it.”

Elle nodded, still slightly confused, but liking all those ingredients so willing to give it a try. “Is that something done at slumber parties too?”

“No.” Tara laughed, “Well maybe, but when Darcy gets an idea, there’s no stopping her.”

The foil was already laid out on the table with 3 different types of tortilla chips on it, so Elle started laying out the ground beef and ground pork that Darcy had already cooked up on the chips. Together the three girls started laying a bag of different shredded cheeses on the meats, trying some as a taste test before too.

The door bell chimed as Elle was setting the bowl of sour cream and guacamole on the table next to the nacho pile, so Tara went to answer the door.

“Imogen’s here!” Tara called, walking into the kitchen.

Darcy and Elle gave Imogen a small hello, still unsure around her after her “I’m an ally!” comment in the lunch room the last time they spoke to her.

“Sahar just texted me saying she’s just around the corner, so I’m going to go wait for her at the door.” Tara said, walking back out of the kitchen.

“Sahar?” Imogen gasped, her face turning pink.

“Yeah.” Darcy replied, “Is that a problem?”

“Oh no!” Imogen answered, “I haven’t spoken to her in ages!”

“Let’s start this party.” Tara announced, walking back in with Sahar. “We just finished the nacho table, so help yourselves and then we are going to watch Barbie and the Princess and the Pauper.”

“Aww. I loved that one!” Imogen exclaimed.

The five girls all started to pile parts from the nacho table onto their own plates before settling on the sofa and watching the movie. Once it was over, Elle was stuffed, but had to admit, it was a pretty cute movie.

Darcy ran into another room for a moment before coming back with several plastic pouches in her hands.

“Next, we’re going to do like a little spa thing. Tara’s mom got us these, so when her parents come back tomorrow, we should thank them.” Darcy started, “There’s some feet masks and some face masks for us to use.”

Everyone grabbed one pack of feet masks and one pack of a face mask to use. Once everyone had the masks on Elle asked, “So what do we do for the next 15 minutes?”

“Play slumber party games!” Darcy exclaimed. “Like truth or dare or kiss/marry/kill. That sort of thing.”

“I haven’t played kiss/marry/kill in years!” Sahar chuckled.

“Let’s play that then!” Tara smiled, “Truth or Dare could be constricting when we can’t move.”

“Okay. How do you play?” Elle asked.

“Usually, someone will say three random people, it could be people you know or celebrities, and you choose if you would rather kiss, marry, or kill them.” Darcy explained, “But we aren’t seven anymore so we should randomly scroll on Instagram and choose three people from who posted on our feeds.”

“Okay! That sounds fun!” Elle agreed. “Who goes first?”

“Imogen, you can scroll for the three people, and we’ll choose, so Elle has an example on how to play.” Tara said.

Imogen got out her phone and scrolled for a couple of seconds before landing on “Selena Gomez, Nick, and Harry.”

“Easy.” Darcy interjected, “Kill Harry.”

The rest of the group nodded in agreement.

“I’ve already kissed Nick so.” Tara shrugged.

“Wait, what?” Imogen interrupted, “What’s the story there?”

“Oh, we kissed once, for like one second, when we were like thirteen.” Tara answered.

Darcy and Sahar snorted at the same time.

“I already told him so I can tell you too. It’s one of the things that made me realize I don’t like kissing boys.” Tara continued.

“Oh my god!” Sahar guffawed.

“That’s my favourite Nick Nelson story.” Darcy laughed.

“It surely couldn’t have been that bad?” Imogen asked, a slight blush on her face.

Tara shrugged in response, looking at Darcy with her heart-eyes.

“I’m straight, I would defiantly marry Selena Gomez if she asked.” Elle answered.

“I’m not straight and I would marry Selena Gomez.” Sahar added.

The rest of the group nodded in agreeance again.

“Elle, do you want to scroll for choices now?” Tara questioned.

“Sure.” Elle replied, scrolling on her phone once before saying, “Charlie, Tao, and the Netflix Instagram account?”

“If I had to choose, I would marry Charlie.” Darcy answered, “We could be each other’s beards.”  

“Charlie is the actual definition of a sweetheart; I agree with you Darcy.” Tara said, Sahar nodding.     

“I don’t really know Tao, but I would kiss him. He’s not bad looking.” Imogen supplied.

Elle was glad she had a face mask on to cover the blush she was sure was on her face.

“Kill the Netflix Instagram account!” Darcy exclaimed.    

The group continued playing the game until the timer went off on Tara’s phone, when all the girls peeled off the masks from their faces and feet and threw it away.

“Let’s make the cake now?” Darcy asked Tara.

“Yeah, let’s make the cake now.” Tara answered.

“Yay! Let’s go make a cake!” Darcy cheered, running into the kitchen to grab a box of cake mix. “Elle, can you grab two eggs?”

Tara pre-heated the oven and instructed Imogen where the liquid measuring cups were for Sahar to pour the amount of milk the recipe called for. Darcy mixed all the ingredients while Elle greased the pan also found by Imogen, and Sahar poured the batter into the pan. All five girls didn’t have to make the cake, but Elle guessed it was so everyone could be included.

While the cake was in the oven, Darcy had pulled out several Perler Bead boards she found on clearance at the Hobbycraft a few weeks prior. Everyone made a small square with their first initial in it as a warm up to get used to the beads, before getting adventurous and making cute animals.

At one point the cake was finished baking and Tara took it out of the oven and set it on the counter to cool, while the group pressed the iron to their beaded designs. The group made a goal to use all the beads with various designs, Tara and Darcy making a heart with their names inside. Elle made a clapperboard for Tao, a book for Issac, and a small drum set for Charlie. At some point the cake had cooled fully and the girls ate it while the making their designs.

Elle yawned feeling tired all of the sudden, looking up at the clock on the oven to see it was already well past one in the morning.

“I’m getting tired too.” Imogen whispered to Elle.

“What’s next on your agenda, Darcy?” Sahar asked, muffling a yawn herself.

“Witchcraft.” Darcy stated seriously.

Elle cocked an eyebrow, she really missed out on not going to slumber parties as a kid, huh.

“Darcy!” Tara chided, slapping Darcy’s arm with the back of her hand.

“I’m kidding- mostly.” Darcy started, “We’re going to watch the new Barbie movie!”

After putting away the leftover cake and laying out the Perler beads to cool, the girls all changed into their pyjamas and settled into a large make shift pillow and blanket fort they had built. Tara loaded up HBO and started the movie. It didn’t take very long before Tara and Darcy were fast asleep cuddling each other. Elle rolled her eyes at her friend wanting to watch the movie and then falling asleep as soon as it started playing.

Half way through the movie Elle was about to ask Imogen her opinion on the cowboy outfits the Ken’s were wearing, when she noticed that Imogen was also fast asleep, surprisingly with her head on Sahar’s shoulder. That’s a question for another time.

Elle finished the movie, already knowing she was going to force Tao to watch it at their next movie night, no matter how many times they would have to rewatch Donnie Darko to make up for it. Elle grabbed the remote off the coffee table as quietly as she could before turning the TV off and going to sleep, thinking back to how much fun she was having.

When Elle woke up the next morning it was to the gentle sound of Tara’s mum saying, “Girls. It’s time to wake up. Your parents will be here soon.”

Elle looked at the clock to see it was past noon, but she felt like she hadn’t slept more than a few hours. All of Tara’s guests sleepily gathered their Perler bead designs into their bags, while her mum made some toast and scrambled eggs for them to eat.

Elle’s mum was the first to arrive, never one to be late when given a time. Elle told all the girls her goodbyes, telling them that she would love to do another sleepover with them all again. She slipped her tennis shoes on, the bottom of her pyjama leg getting caught between her foot and the back of her shoe, but not really caring.

Elle climbed into her mum’s car and set her bag down between her feet, taking a sip from her mum’s water bottle.

“How was the sleepover, honey?” Elle’s mum asked, before driving off.

“It was really fun, Mum.” Elle smiled.

“Yeah?” Elle’s mum questioned.

“Yeah.” Elle replied, “Maybe we can host the next one?”

“That sounds like a great idea sweetie.” Elle’s mum smiled.

Elle was sure her mum was apprehensive about her going to the slumber party, but Elle knew now that her mum was just as happy as she was about her first slumber party.  

~~~

Thank you @sleepywriter00 for checking over this for me when I was nervous about posting it. ❤️

as always, if there was a cw or tw, please let me know and i will fix the a/n asap.

#idk what to tag this tbh #elle & tara & darcy #i'll probably come back to these tags later

[dweemeister]

Movie Odyssey Retrospective

The Phantom of the Opera (1925)

By the time French journalist-turned-novelist Gaston Leroux published Le Fantôme de l'Opéra as a serial in 1909, he was best known for his detective fiction, deeply influenced by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle and Edgar Allan Poe. The Phantom of the Opera plays out like a Poe work – teeming with the macabre, painted with one character’s fanatic, violent lust. In serial form and, later, as a novel, Leroux’s work won praise across the West. One of the book’s many fans was Universal Pictures president Carl Laemmle who, on a 1922 trip to Paris, met with Leroux. While on the trip, he read Phantom (a copy gifted to him by Leroux) in a single night, and bought the film rights with a certain actor already in mind.

Laemmle’s first and only choice for the role of the Phantom was about to play Quasimodo in Universal’s 1923 adaptation of Victor Hugo’s The Hunchback of Notre Dame. That actor, Lon Chaney, had subsisted on bit roles and background parts since entering into a contract with Universal in 1912. Chaney, who was about to sign a contract with Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer (MGM), became an instant sensation the moment The Hunchback of Notre Dame hit theaters. Audiences and critics in the early 1920s were simultaneously horrified at the sight of his Quasimodo yet, crucially, felt a profound empathy towards the character.

In his prior films, as well as Hunchback, Chaney separated himself from his fellow bit actors with a skill that almost no other actor in Hollywood possessed: he was also a makeup artist. At this time, actors applied their own makeup – often simple cosmetics or unconvincing facial hair. None of the major Hollywood studios had makeup departments in the early 1920s, and it would not be until the 1940s that each studio had such a department. Chaney, the son of two deaf and mute adults, was also a master of physical acting, and could expertly use his hands and arms to empower a scene. Though already bound for MGM, Chaney could not possibly pass up the role of Erik, the Phantom. Despite frequent clashes with director Rupert Julian (1923’s Merry-Go-Round and 1930’s The Cat Creeps; despite being Universal’s most acclaimed director at this time, Julian was either sacked or walked away mid-production), Chaney’s performance alone earned him his place in cinematic history and, for this film, an iconic work of horror cinema and silent film.

As the film begins, we find ourselves at the Palais Garnier, home of the Paris Opera. The Opera’s management has resigned, turning over the Palais Garnier to new ownership. As the ink dries on the contract and as the previous owners depart, they warn about a Phantom of the Opera, who likes sitting in one of the box seats. Soon after, prima donna Carlotta (Virginia Pearson) receives a threatening letter from the Phantom. She must step aside and allow a chorus girl, Christine Daaé (Mary Philbin), sing the lead role in Charles Gounod’s Faust. If she refuses to comply, the Phantom promises something horrific. Aware of the letter, Christine the next day confers with her loved one, the Vicomte Raoul de Chagny (Norman Kerry), that she has been receiving musical guidance from a “Spirit of Music”, whom she has heard through the walls of her dressing room. Raoul laughs this off, but a series of murderous incidents at that evening’s production of Faust is no laughing matter. Christine eventually meets the shadowy musical genius of the Phantom, whose name is Erik (Chaney). In his subterranean lair, he professes his love to her – a love that will never die.

Rupert Julian’s The Phantom of the Opera also stars Arthur Edmund Carewe as the Inspector Ledoux (for fans of Andrew Lloyd Webber’s musical version, this is the Madame Giry character); Gibson Gowland as Simon Buquet; and John St. Polis as Raoul’s brother, the Comte Philippe de Chagny.

Before extoling this film, one has to single out Mary Philbin and Norman Kerry as the glaring underperformers in this adaptation. Philbin would become a much better actress than she displays here, if The Man Who Laughs (1928) is any indication. Yet, Philbin’s Christine is a blank slate, devoid of much personality and interest. It also does not help that Norman Kerry plays Raoul in a similar fashion. Raoul, in any adaptation of Phantom, tends to be a boring role. But goodness me, for a B-actor who was acclaimed for his tall, dark, and handsome looks and screen persona, he is a charisma vacuum here. During Kerry’s more intimate scenes with Philbin, you may notice that Kerry has a case of “roving hands” when he gets close with Philbin. Philbin, who could not visibly react to these moments on-camera, surreptitiously took Kerry’s hands and held them there to stop the touching.

Philbin is much better when sharing the screen opposite Chaney. Chaney and Philbin both could not stand director Rupert Julian – whom both actors, as well almost all of the crew, regarded as an imposing fraud who knew little about making art and more about how to cut costs (Laemmle appointed Julian for this film in part due to Julian’s reputation for delivering work under budget). There are unconfirmed accounts that after Julian’s departure or removal from Phantom, Chaney himself directed the remainder of the shoot aside from the final climactic chase scene (which was the uncredited Edward Sedgwick’s responsibility). In any case, Philbin’s terror when around Chaney was real. The sets of the Phantom’s lair reportedly spooked her – the subterranean waterways, his inner sanctum. Philbin also received no preparation before the filming of what is now one of the signature moments of the silent film era and all of horror cinema. Her reaction to Lon Chaney’s self-applied makeup – meant to appear half-skin, half-skeletal – was the first time that she saw Chaney’s Phantom in all his gruesomeness. Philbin, freed of the innocent, pedestrian dialogue of the film’s opening act, gifts to the camera one hell of a reaction, fully fitting within the bounds of silent film horror.

There are conflicting records on how Chaney achieved the Phantom’s final appearance. The descriptions forthcoming are the elements that freely-available scholarship generally accepts as true. It appears that Chaney utilized a skull cap to raise his forehead’s height, as well as marking deep pencil lines onto that cap to accentuate wrinkles and his brow. He also raised his cheekbones by stuffing cotton into his cheeks, as well as placing a set of stylized, decaying dentures. Inner-nasal wiring altered the angle of his nose, and white highlights across his face contributed to his skeletal look for the cameras. Cinematographer Charles Van Enger (1920's The Last of the Mohicans, uncredited on 1925's The Big Parade) – who, other than Chaney, was one of the most familiar onset with Chaney’s makeup – claimed that the nasal wiring sometimes led to significant bleeding. Taking inspiration from Chaney’s approach to keeping the makeup artistry hidden from Philbin and others, Universal kept the Phantom’s true appearance a secret from the public and press. The studio advised movie theaters to keep smelling salts ready, in case of audience members fainting during the unmasking scene. According to popular reporting at the time, audience members did scream and faint upon the reveal; a nine-year-old Gregory Peck’s first movie memory was being so terrified of Lon Chaney’s Phantom, that he asked to sleep with his grandmother that evening after he came home.

Lon Chaney’s tremendous performance allows The Phantom of the Opera to soar. Arguably, it is his career pinnacle. Masked or unmasked, Chaney’s Phantom dominates the frame at any moment he is onscreen aside from the film’s final chase sequence. Whether glowering over Christine, majestically gesturing in silhouette, strutting down the Opera House steps during the Bal Masqué, or tucked into the corner of the frame, Chaney’s physical presence draws the audience’s eyes to whatever he is doing. The differences in posture from before and after the unmasking scene are striking – from an elegant specter to a broken, hunched figure (appearing to draw some inspiration from his experience playing Quasimodo two years earlier) seething with pent-up carnality, rage, and sorrow. Chaney’s Phantom garners the audience’s sympathy when he gives Christine the grand tour of his chambers. Look at his posture and hands when he mentions, “That is where I sleep,” and, “If I am the Phantom, it is because man’s hatred has made me so.”  That Chaney can ease through these transitions and transformations – as well as a third transformation, as the Red Death during the Bal Masqué – so naturally, without a misstep, is a testament to his acting ability.

Underneath the tortured and twisted visage of a man who has committed horrific acts is a vulnerable and misguided human being. His dreams, dashed and discarded by all others, have turned to despicable means. The role of the Phantom plays brilliantly to Chaney’s genius: to have audiences sympathize with even the most despicable or despondent characters he played. Chaney accomplishes this despite this film characterizing the Phantom with less sympathy than Leroux’s original novel and the popular Andrew Lloyd Webber musical.

This is already on top of Charles Van Enger’s camerawork; the sharp editing from a team including Edward Curtiss (1932’s Scarface) Maurice Pivar (1923’s The Hunchback of Notre Dame), Gilmore Walker (1927’s Uncle Tom’s Cabin), and Lois Weber.

Weber, who in 1916 was Universal’s highest-paid director, underwent numerous financial difficulties over that decade. One of Hollywood’s first true auteurs and largely ignored in the history of film until recently, Weber formed her own production company with Universal’s assistance in 1917, off the success of Shoes (1916). Through World War I, Weber’s movies were popular until around the turn of the decade, when her “didactic” filmmaking (a result of her devout Christian upbringing) went out of style. Most visibly among Weber’s financial failures of the early 1920s, The Blot (1921) – a movie that scholars and Weber himself considered her best – flopped in theaters. After two hiatuses from filmmaking in the early 1920s, Weber was brought in to conduct the final bits of editing on The Phantom of the Opera before returning to directing under Universal.

Though none of the film’s production designers were yet to hit their peak, The Phantom of the Opera benefitted from having a soon-to-be all-star art department including James Basevi (1944’s The Song of Bernadette), Cedric Gibbons (almost any and all MGM movies from 1925 onward), and Robert Florey (1932’s Murders in the Rue Morgue). Inspired by designs sketched by French art director Ben Carré, the production design trio spared no expense to bring Carré’s illustrations to life and used the entirety of Universal’s Soundstage 28 to construct all necessary interior sets. The set’s five tiers of seating and vast foyer needed to support several hundred extras. So unlike the customary wooden supports commonplace during the silent era for gargantuan sets, The Phantom of the Opera’s set for the Palais Garnier became the first film set ever to use steel supports planted into concrete. Basevi, Gibbons, and Florey’s work is glorious, with no special effects to supplement the visuals. The seventeen-minute Bal Masqué scene – which was shot in gorgeous two-strip Technicolor (the earliest form of Technicolor, which emphasized greens and reds) – is the most striking of all, unfurling its gaudy magnificence to heights rarely seen in cinema.

Universal’s Soundstage 28 was an integral part of the VIP tour at Universal Studios Hollywood for decades. Though the orchestra seats and the stage of the film’s Palais Garnier had long gone, the backside box seats of the auditorium remained. Stage 28 featured in numerous films after The Phantom of the Opera, including Dracula (1931), the Lon Chaney biopic Man of a Thousand Faces (1957), Psycho (1960), Charade (1963), Jurassic Park (1993), How the Grinch Stole Christmas (2000), and The Muppets (2011). The soundstage was also supposedly haunted, with individuals claiming to see a caped figure (Lon Chaney as the Phantom?) running around the catwalks, lights flickering on and off, and doors opening and closing on their own. In 2014, after standing for almost ninety years, Universal decided to demolish Stage 28 so as to expand its theme park. However, the historic set escaped the wrecking ball, as Universal decided to disassemble the set, place it into storage, and perhaps someday reassemble it. It is a fate far kinder than almost all other production design relics from the silent era.

Unlike what was coming out of Weimar Germany in the 1920s in the form of German Expressionism, American horror films had no template to follow when The Phantom of the Opera arrived in theaters. There would be no codification of American horror cinema’s tropes and sense of timing until the next decade. But without 1925’s The Phantom of the Opera, Universal would never become the house of horror it did in the 1930s through the early ‘50s (including the Dracula, Frankenstein, Mummy, Invisible Man, Wolf Man, and Creature from the Black Lagoon series). So, unbound by any unwritten guidelines, 1925’s The Phantom of the Opera – a horror film, but arguably also a melodrama with elements of horror – consumes the viewer with its chilling atmosphere and, from Lon Chaney, one of the best cinematic performances ever, without any qualification. For silent film novices, this is one of the best films to begin with (outside the comedies of Charlie Chaplin, Buster Keaton, and Harold Lloyd). Regardless of one’s familiarity with silent film, The Phantom of the Opera is a cinematic milestone.

My rating: 9.5/10

^ Based on my personal imdb rating. My interpretation of that ratings system can be found in the “Ratings system” page on my blog. Half-points are always rounded down.

For more of my reviews tagged “My Movie Odyssey”, check out the tag of the same name on my blog.

This is the twenty-third Movie Odyssey Retrospective. Movie Odyssey Retrospectives are reviews on films I had seen in their entirety before this blog’s creation or films I failed to give a full-length write-up to following the blog’s creation. Previous Retrospectives include Dracula (1931 English-language version), Oliver! (1968), and Peter Pan (1953).

#The Phantom of the Opera #Rupert Julian #Lon Chaney #Mary Philbin #Norman Kerry #Carl Laemmle #Gaston Leroux #Ernst Laemmle #Edward Sedgwick #Arthur Edmund Carewe #Gibson Gowland #Snitz Edwards #Virginia Pearson #Edward Curtiss #Maurice Pivar #Gilmore Walker #Lois Weber #silent film #TCM #My Movie Odyssey

[suchafuckingriot]

Tubbo IS DONE with tommy asking if hes hot so hes like fuck it whatever

kind of derailing from the ask, but i feel like tubbo doesn’t really care about tommy flirting with him as much as people make it out to be. don’t get me wrong, tommy definitely has a history of taking it too far and actually making tubbo upset, and tubbo definitely doesn’t like it, but i feel like people blow it way out of proportion. i think tubbos main problem with it is it happening in front of an audience, you know?

i say that because clingy is 100% an off camera relationship, despite the fact that they make content together, and i think their dynamic is completely different (to an extent) when they’re not in front of the internet. i think this is one of the parts where the distinction between “tommy” and “tubbo” versus “tom” and “toby” really matters. the way tubbo talks about tommy (tom) when asked about him completely misaligns with the perception and character of “tommy”, which is usually the persona that people are asking about. i think he’s even said on stream after being asked how he feels about tommy that people don’t seem to understand that tommy isn’t “tommy” all the time, that he really doesn’t behave like that 24/7. that tubbo sees him as a good friend and a good person. if you ask tubbo about tommy, he doesn’t think about “tommy”, he thinks about tom.

point being, i really don’t think tubbo (toby) gives much of a shit about the slightly more “homoerotic” instances of their relationship in real life, and i don’t think tommy (tom) creates those instances anywhere near as much as he does on camera. one example could be the tubbo alt stream where tommy runs from his office to tubbos house and complains that tubbo didn’t give him a big hug and a little kiss for it, to which tubbo tells tommy, “what, you want a little kiss? i’ll give you a little kiss”, smirking and obviously fucking with tommy. tommy immediately backs down, of course, and tubbo says he didn’t think so. it’s only one instance, but i think it’s a good example of the fact that their relationship isn’t just this one sided thing people act like it is. tubbo isn’t this prudish, virginal, innocent little bumblebee people treat him like, and tommy isn’t as much of a boldfaced shithead as he pretends he is. i think realistically, in real life, they are a normal pair of best friends that aren’t any more or less weird about each other than the average friendship. if tommy asks tubbo what he thinks of his new haircut, tubbo is gonna tell him without any of the “ew why you asking me get your own damn opinion 🙄” he would normally give on camera.

with that in mind, something else to consider is tommy’s content brain and how acutely aware he is of what people like about his dynamics with other people and how to hit each of those points perfectly. the best examples of it are clingyduo and crimeboys. he understands the key principles of their dynamic, particularly the fact that tommy is obsessed with tubbo and how that makes him act. that’s where the gay jokes and possessiveness and controlling nature come from, even if they do stem from tommy and tubbos genuine dynamic, especially when they were younger. back then it was charming and sweet because they were just that excited to play with each other, now it’s frustrating because it’s just tommy being mean to tubbo. plus, sometimes tommy antagonizing tubbo is really to try and make tubbo laugh, because sometimes it does work! my clingy cinematic parallels post is an example.

if tommy’s drive to push the dynamic is his content brain, tubbos resistance against it is his want for privacy. people often ask how tubbo went from “i don’t blame people who ship us” to where he is now, but i think tubbos original statement is pretty self explanatory. i mean, they’re literally called clingyduo. they both very obviously display a lot of affection towards each other, and they can’t really hide it because it’s part of their natural chemistry. speaking from personal experience, when you have a relationship like that, people pick up on it and they get fucking ANNOYING. depending on the kind of person you are or what you value, you react differently to people being weird about it. some people (tommy) lean into it, play it up, stick up a middle finger. other people (tubbo) retreat, keep that relationship more private, stick the middle finger up behind their back. best example of this in action is when tommy says i love you or something else sweet to tubbo and tubbo responds "people dont take it like that". if tubbo played along with the bit, he would get chained to it, and the audience would ruin his relationship with tommy. obviously he doesn't want that, cue the tubbo shutting almost all tommy affection/gaybaiting down.

anyways. i think i'm probably talking to a wall and people are already aware of everything i talked about. plus it's not even a very good essay. however i'm tired of the way people treat clingy and how it feeds into infantilizing tubbo, which i've been seeing a lot of lately. idk. conclusion: i don't think tommy is as weird about tubbo irl and i don't think tubbo cares as much if he is either. i'm tired of seeing clingy stepping on each other's toes get treated so weird. toodles!

#this really is a shit essay however. i have a life lol im not gonna bother rewriting it or being as thorough as i need to be #tommycrit #clingy #ask

[mrnerdteacher]

A Cosmic Hourglass Half-Full: A Spoiler-Filled List of Everything I Appreciated about "Quantumania"

“So… what’s next… Secret Wars?” As someone whose feelings for the last two Marvel movies can be described as “mixed at best,” I was surprised to find myself uttering these words outside my local Laemmle.

It was 3 pm after a matinee showing of “Ant-Man & The Wasp: Quantumania”, and while I found the movie heavy on the green screen and light on just about everything else, I was already looking forward to reuniting with my college friends for the next entry in ever-expanding Marvel Cinematic Universe.

It was at that moment that it occurred to me: the MCU, for better or for worse, is no longer just a franchise of movies and tv shows. They are cultural events. They are a recurring reason to gather with friends and family, and they give us something to talk about besides climate change and the price of gas. For this reason, attending a Marvel movie is almost like a sporting event. Sometimes, as with the case in Quantumania or Dark World, your team has a bad day. But that doesn’t mean you quit being a fan. It’s just more of a reason to celebrate franchise-defining moments, ala No Way Home or Endgame.

Therefore, in the spirit of optimistic fandom, here is a SPOILER-FILLED LIST OF EVERYTHING TO APPRECIATE ABOUT QUANTUMANIA, in order of appearance. Because yes, we lost this round, but the game definitely had some highlights…

-Jonathan Majors as Kang the Conqueror-

Simultaneously the movie’s greatest strength and most glaring weakness is the way it left you wanting more from the MCU’s newest big bad. Can an actor nail all his lines, even without things like motivation or context? Apparently, yeah. Majors might not actually have much to do in this movie, but you’ll struggle to take your eyes off him.

-Look Out for the Little Guy-

Scott’s post-Endgame memoir has been a running gag in the MCU for awhile now, but seeing Rudd ham it up in a Barnes n’ Noble is joy in its purest form. If this didn’t make you smile, I think you got the wrong theater…

-William Jackson Harper as Quaz, the Telepath-

Yeah, I didn’t know that character had a name either. Still, this Good Place alum delivered the laughs with every line. I think we’d all watch a comedy sitcom set in the quantum realm if Harper was the showrunner.

“Like Stuffing a Turkey”

Whatever discomfort we endured watching Michael Douglas double-fist a pair of gummy worms was paid off in perhaps the greatest “I’ll drive” moment in movie history. I’ve never heard an audience cheer for anything stranger.

All Things M.O.D.O.K.

While Cross’s freakish appearance provided some of the movie’s best visual gags, writer Jeff Loveness also deftly turned Yellowjacket from a D-list villain into one of the most entertaining and memorable characters in the entire MCU. And his death scene? Instant meme material. It was THAT good.

One in a Million Paul Rudds

-Remember that iconic Infinity War moment when Doctor Strange tells Tony that there is literally a one in 14 million chance that Thanos is defeated? Well apparently there’s also a one in a billion chance that Scott keeps his job at Baskin Robbins and never becomes Ant-Man in the first place. That’s pure comedy.

What about you? Which moments saved the movie for you, if even temporarily?

#marvel mcu #mcu #ant man #quantumania #paul rudd #movies #evangeline lilly #michael douglas #michelle pfeiffer #ant man and the wasp #m.o.d.o.k. #baskin robbins #infinity war #avengers endgame #spider man no way home

[astridhoff03]

Best Conclusions i‘ve Ever Seen in Cinematic History to two of DreamWorks‘ famoust Franchises.

Madagascar 3 is fantastic Not only because of DuBois, But also because of our funny Major Characteres. They make Me laugh every Time and they were Are Big Part of my Childhood. Particulary the Penguins and King Julien. Thank you to all who work-and make Madagascar possible.

Httyd3, I cry every Time I See it. It‘s so underrated and it should had Win the Oscar of 2019, because this Movie is Just Wonderful. Emotional. Funny. Romantic. The Message is soooo delightful. The Theme of Love Works so Well. The Animation is stunning…

Very Good Job Dean DeBlois, Jay Baruchel, America Ferrera, Cate Blanchett, Gerad Butler, Graig Ferguson and all who work on the Masterpieces of the Httyd-Franchise. It‘s my Number One of all Franchises I‘ve Ever Seen and it means so much to Me. Hiccup, Astrid, Toothless and their Friends inspire Me until this Day.

Thank you❤️‍🔥

#httyd franchise #httyd 3 #dreamworks animation #httyd #httyd astrid #httyd hiccup #madagascar franchise #madagascar 3