#a ..... *jack* of all trades u might say ....

[xoteajays]

... flint jakki

i will turn myself into a gun, because it's all i have, because i'm hungry and hollow and just want something to call my own - @/sikenpoems.

#ocappreciation #fyeahonepieceocs #opla oc #one piece oc #queerocs #ochub #its wlw nami ship time!!! #oc: jakki flint #shes a sword AND gun lesbian #a ..... *jack* of all trades u might say ....

[jess-themess05]

Favorite fics?

oh geez. i’m gonna try keep it sweet and simple less i go on and make it unbearable to read. also these summaries are gonna be terrible but i think all of these are gonna be fnaf sun and moon fics i’m SORRY ITS IN MY HEAD BUT ANYWAYS- SHORT N SWEET LES GO

A Dose of Sunshine and Starlight - @give-me-your-monsters a slow burn w/ lots of angst and bittersweet-ness aww but you are all mentally ill.

Bug Love - @theohnocorral the boys are now bug-ified gods and take a liking to a mortal who probably apologies to inanimate objects

Universal Jesters - @lovelymoonmagic you accidentally become the handler to pair of bots with memory loss and mystery trauma

it was, in reality, not fine - @bones-of-a-rabbit you, the reader, have the self preservation skills as a bowl of soup. also oblivious to love hehe

Late Night to Early Morning - Loyal_Backstabber reader meets neglected robot clowns and vows to risk their life for them

Solar Lunacy - @bamsara its- ITS SOLAR LUNACY. anyways you meet certified murder robots and say i can fix em, they’re gonna fix u too.

copper cogs rusted through - @paper-lilypie “oh what’s this, one of these jesters tried killing me? eh it’s fine” then you fall in love

Rotating Shifts - LightningTriceratops protag mistakes sun for unconscious, jaundice ridden man and realizes he’s a robot with a not dead brother and separation anxiety

basically ANYTHINGGG by @naffeclipse , but the first story i ever read from them was In Deep Dreams Between the Waves very different fro, eclipse in sleuth jesters cause he’s actually decent. (also poor vanessa girl don’t get a break)

Clowning Around - EngageSage you overcome your anxiety to protect a poor jester, and are fueled by spite to fuck up moon man for being a certified bitch

Celestial hearts in a purple mind - @kabra-malvada *finds ominous object* *touches it* *is shocked to find they are possessed*

Twin Animatronics With Too Much Time on Their Hands - @twinanimatronics & @dana-chan-the-control-brain you fall in love and fight the temptation to resurrect a dead dude and kill him again

The Night Shift - @certified-handler oopsie you now work with a needy jester who sweeps you off your feet, even more oopsie he turns into a psychopath when the lights go out and triple oopsie you fall in love with HIM too

Star Crossed Souls - @faz-friendly-light-up-shoes reader said “god give me a sign i’ll find love.” gets the sign, and ignores it

404: Personal Space Not Found - CrazedAuthor anxiety filled individual thinks they will be fixed by a child supervisor, gets surprised by his stab happy twin

Celestial Syzygy - @echoingkarma you’re like the jack of all trades, including befriending animatronics who may or may not hate you (and want to maim you) you are probably underpaid.

My Neighbor Mr. Roboto - @kagedbird oh what’s this? you think moving into your new apartment will be simple and boring? WRONG there’s a robot in your closet. and everywhere- why are there so many-

Apology Flowers and Blooming Hours - @daunsun you’d think sentient flowers would have no angsty backstory huh? well actually...

Our Orbit is Elliptical - @sycopomp like your intrusive thoughts came to life, and you choose to ignore them

Lost and Found - SmolShampoo technology is so cool right guys? you got ai, and that ai can get traumatized! how cool??

Stare at the Abyss; It Might Look Back - @characcoon reader becomes a human punching bag and finds new rusty robot roommates. once they escape a deteriorating child’s play place they walked into

Ventura Highway - @madamemiz says “hey is anyone gonna take this robot?” and doesn’t wait for an answer.

Repaired Unstable - @blonde-fraumell you decide to work alongside your childhood friend! oh how non threatening he was- hey why’s this man TEN FEET TALL. and why’s this other man so kickable.

also, obligatory mer may fics! even though it’s no longer may these are still being updated :D

Luminescent Charm - @finfiprince reader finds the fishy dudes they saved as a kid in a cage, continues to spite god until they can save them

Celestial Omens (that really like Fishsticks) - @bamsara (again yes) you save two scared bastard fish and feed them in your bathroom, a decade later they see u and go “well they gave us fishsticks no drowning for them”

The Sea Jesters are Real Science - MatosaurusRex & sixty_nine13 your idol hires you to take care of real life mer! wow! unfortunately being their therapist wasn’t in the contract

Pisces Caelestis - S_V i’m a little scared of reader. they got attacked by a mer and passed out for 3 days and said “yeah lmao i’ll be fine” nO YOU WONT-

#oh this was #this was not short #BUT HEY IT COULD BE LONGER #there’s definitely more to add but if people are actually interested in hearing my recs i’d be happy to oblige! #fnaf security breach #fnaf #fnaf au #also these are in no order! just what came to mind :) #fnaf fanfic

[strawbubbysugar]

Happy birthday Bubby!

Couple more questions!

-Are you able to say everyone’s ages in So(u)l, including the animatronics?

-Does June ever play his guitar and sing in public or at bars or anything or does he only do that at home now?

-Soulmate question, kinda regarding Rush and Morgan’s bond, does that imply that if you don’t have a soulmate due to your previous one passing away, you can get a new bond later even if your future soulmate already exists? Like the string will “wait” kinda until they’re ready? Or was Morgan and Rush’s string there right when Rush woke up?

-What are June, Hello, and Goodbye’s main fidgets/stims?

-Okay this might be weird lol but I’m curious, what are Hello and Goodbye’s favorite little things that June does in his sleep? Does he talk, twitch, unconsciously cling to them like a koala, anything like that?

-What kind of odd jobs does June do on the side?

Thank you!!

i wanna keep it vague, but June is roughly in his mid 20's matt is roughly in his mid-late 30's Marlow is roughly one year younger than June Morgan is two years older than June Hello is a year old (his AI is somewhere around June's age) Goodbye was a year older than June (now the same age as Hello) Rush is around 8 years old (his ai is early 30's) Wibble is around 6 years old (his ai is the same as Rush) Cammie is 4 around years old (her ai is the same as wibble and rush) Octavia is around 2 years old, but was technically never completed (her size makes it much easier to fit a more complex system in her, so her mental age is around 40) The skrittles have the same AI age as toddlers, but theyre a few months old Astro Cadet has been worked on off and on for about six years, and his ai is about the same age. It grows much slower than the WOW branded animatronics

Absolutely no in public things. He's gotten a lot more shy about performing since his band days. He only ever plays for hello/goodbye and piper

Soulmate marks are all about right time, right place. if you arent the version of yourself that would be soulmates with someone, no markings will show up. Morgan was a very different person with their last soulmate, and their life experiences changed who they are. it happens! people change, especially as they get older. its why a lot of people are told not to be upset if they dont get any markings until later on (SPOILERS BELOW) Its why samir and june didnt have any soul marks until samir was goodbye. he wasnt the person that wouldve been soulmates with june yet, he needed to experience and change and grow before that would happen. So did june!

June chews his lip a lot, and sighs. Sometimes he sighs for no reason just because he forgot to breathe. I think his favourite fidget toy would be one of those fidget cubes Hello stims by waving/flapping his arms, or playing with his hands. I think he'd enjoy fidget spinners or rubix cubes! Goodbye stims with squeezing/pressure. He'd enjoy weighted blankets, and I think he'd enjoy stress balls. Ones with thick stuff inside so he can really squeeze down

Hello likes it when June sighs in his sleep, or mumbles. Goodbye thinks its funny when he snores on occasion, and records it to play it back while pretending to nap. (taking inspiration from my roommate bc its hilarious, sometimes june will make the saddest, softest little sigh in his sleep and hello will wake him up like "WERE YOU HAVING A BAD DREAM ARE YOU OKAY" & june will be entirely confused)

June does a lil of everything. people in town come to him for a lot of stuff like yard work, painting houses/fences, cleaning houses. He occasionally comes into bryn's office and helps with anything they might need too, like fixing the chairs, etc. He's known as a jack of all trades around town (which makes him feel nostalgic, since that used to be what he called his childhood best friend)

#ask #so(u)l project #i ADORE getting these asks #theyre so fun

[eddsworld-the-masquerade]

Concept art for some minor but important characters that already made an appearance in the script! Since they don't have their own paragraphs on characters page I've put some notes (for both myself and u) and I'll describe them and what they mean a little more in text

Hellucard is Edd's personal solicitor (lawyer) but more importantly his ghoul. First created to make ends meet at the time when Edd needed that someone who knows loopholes in law, Edd eventually grew attached to him and his shiny teeth. Once he even said Hellucard was "the only one to truly understand him" (he denies he did though).

Over time Hellu learned all the things Edd couldn't be bothered to learn himself so he's a bit of a jack of all trades. He was also taught the basics of the Dementation discipline, which allows Hellu to confuse people's minds and stir their judgment in the direction he needs.

As time went on Hellu also began to adopt some of Edd's quirks, namely his weird attachment to glasses. Hellucard now has trouble seeing without his shades on (as if he had minus something and needed prescription glasses).

He seems very devoted. Must be some reason as to why he'd stay by Edd's side for so long.

Eira is Tord's younger sister. The two of them were pretty close, as is evident by her being the first person to appear in his memories (aka dream/nightmare sequences). They had the sweetest relationship which I'd love to explore ^^

Eira used to be the "preppy" kid with her circle of friends, however she feared her unconventional interests might scare the girls off. Even more so when the family moved to England. It's something she learned to overcome now in her 30s and looking back on her brother's advice.

Unfortunately the siblings' closeness also meant Tord's embrace/"disappearance" affected them both greatly. She's trying to move on after 10 whole years (by now it's safe to assume he's dead), but it's also safe to say the event changed her forever.

She stayed in London to support their father (at least she was able to get herself her dream job hahah). And now that Tord is back in town, well...this could lead to something...👀

#eddsworld au #eddsworld vtm au #art #mod art #concept art

[shakethatsassyass]

hi!! are u still active? i see the askbox is opeen sooo.

could i request some relationship of older!GOM like who's the marrying type, what do they like, who sleeps around most, who finds dating bother some etc etc!!! Maybe their ideal types in a s/o as well??? Thank u so muuuuch im so excited if everaaa

Hi! This request is really interesting and here are my dating headcanons for the GOM. You can request another one for their ideal types if you’d like since this ended up quite long 😅

GOM Dating/Marriage Headcanons

a/n: unedited

KUROKO

Come on, obviously this guy is the most emotionally intelligent out of all of them. 

But does he approach the people he likes? No 

But it’s painfully obvious when he does fancy someone

His ears become red. Warning: fair chance of passing out

He does his best to be more assertive though, meticulously planning how to approach his crush

Very very thoughtful, remembers what you told him 128 days, 13 hours, 6 minutes ago about that video you were showing him

When he’s with someone, you better bet the relationship will last for years

Not that he’s boring like that or anything but Kuroko hates the mind games that come with modern dating

But Kuroko’s immensely loyal to some may argue, a fault, I think

Like s/o wants to swerve careers? Kuroko supports

Wants to start a small business? He’s supportive 

Needs to rob a bank/hide a body? He has all the tools already......

I just imagine domestic fluff kuroko being the troll that he is. he purposefully hides in the corner to surprise you with a heart attack when you come back home 

KISE

Kise has quite a fanbase, as we all know

Headcanoning is that a word that Kise gets scouted by a Japanese company and becomes an idol for a short while

Kise’s a jack-of-all-trades so I can definitely see him working in different fields and having multiple sources of income

Which means he’s probably met a lot of people along the way

So yes this boy dates casually a lot, mostly just for publicity, and the other party knows it usually. People just come up to him and ask him out.

He has to have MAD respect for the person to even consider seriously or sometimes casually dating them or making the first move, though. Like the person of his interest has to be VERY good at what they do and have banger character

Kise is, contrary to popular opinion, not shallow at all. Personality and a person’s passion/morals comes first. He knows the feeling of being ogled for your looks and how those feelings of infatuation are fleeting

BUT I’D BE LYING IF I DONT SAY THAT KISE 100% LOVES THE CHASE. He’s a fast learner so I bet he also gets bored pretty quickly

If you wanna date Kise, you better not be the jealous type and not be controlling. Someone who can keep him on his toes. 

Fun, goofy, sometimes intimidating lover

AOMINE

Somehow I see him settling down earlier than the others. 

But before that he sleeps around a lot. 

He likes hot women, that’s canon, but like he doesn’t date seriously during his early 20s, just casually. 

Many fics present Aomine as this suave guy who can pick up any person he likes but I honestly doubt that’s the case 

Definitely gets with Momoi at least once, whether they cross the line between bffs and lovers officially is up to Aomine sadly (see Replace novel)

Thankfully, he’s as graceful on the court as he’s not on the dating scene 

So many people approach him on their own, often as fans who, if they ask appropriately enough, gets to go home with him

Boy just wants to have fun

But he never love bombs, and is in no way a manipulative lover

Respects your boundaries and asks for consent 1000%

When he falls in love tho, he falls hard

He might start off with seemingly cold feet and is indifferent but that’s just him actually thinking how to properly take the relationship to the next level considering all his hang-ups

Aomine’s insanely loyal and a committed relationship with him is something that even becomes sweeter over time. 

Once he’s committed, he’s all in: he thinks of marriage, kids, the works

Aomine may look tough but he’s all soft for his s/o

MIDORIMA

He’s a late bloomer in the dating department

Midorima just thinks it’s bothersome. He’s busy with basketball and medical school already. He just doesn’t see what the fuss is about 

But can you imagine if he just falls in love with an incompatible sun sign???

Like an Aquarius or a Libra (Murasakibara’s one)… or god forbid an Aries!!

And he just freaks out and questions his beliefs and does research on the rest of his/their birth chart. Lmao

Takao secretly made Midorima a dating app account and his profile gets plenty of traffic

Midorima knows nothing about this and refuses downright every time Takao tries to set him up with someone

Doesn’t do casual. Period.

You have to be very patient with him he’s the densest out of all of them you might as well just spell it out for him for Midorima to get the hint that you’re flirting

Midorima’s romantic relationships can only ever happen organically so you can’t 1. Force it. 2. Expect him to seek out relations for its own sake

Will either have to be set up by a friend on a date OR

Have some Kdrama destiny shit to occur for romance to get through his head (Doctor Midorima with patient reader AU???

Needless to say Midorima’s a faithful partner in all senses of the word. He’s consistent, hard-working, and responsible. He’s the kind of person who’d literally grow old with his lover and wake up next to them each morning. 

MURASAKIBARA

Another one who doesn’t like initiate dates

No formal conversations of labels or anything like that

He may be a man child at times but no one is more loyal than this giant

You wanna date him? You better know how to cook. Or at the very least love food

He will not ask you out, well not directly anyway

Doesn’t take breakups well

He will sulk for days, someone from the GOM or Himuro or his siblings has to drag him out of the room so he could take a shower

One day you’ll just notice him hanging out with you

Anyway I hc that he gets the most jealous out of everyone in GOM. Like he gets too little attention and you’ll find him pouting like a kid

Mura also really easily distracted, and might even come across quite cold

It’s only because he rarely sweats the small stuff

So sometimes you’d be upset and he wouldn’t notice

WARNING: this could go on for days so unless you tell it to him straight up he won’t know you’re even upset

Buuuuut gets the hang of it after several months

He’s attentive when he needs to be, especially when it comes to his partner’s needs

So fights would rarely occur, unless it’s about his habits

His ideal s/o is a mom. Sorta

There I said it

TL;DR Murasakibara baby in the streets daddy in the sheets

But tbh any established relationship with him would be quite stable, his life would simply revolve around his s/o, food, and basketball

AKASHI

Akashi’s future is all planned out.

Being the only child in his political and influential family, marriage and family’s simply part of his duty. I read somewhere that his parents were most likely in an arranged marriage and that it’s not far off that he would be too, as Masaomi expects, when the time comes.

He sees the appeal in dating around but eventually decides against it because it’s seen as taboo (his family seems to be traditional), though he thinks about it from time to time when he feels lonely :-(

Lots of women (and men) fawn themselves over Akashi, he’s used to it, while he appreciates the support, emotional connection and bond is an important factor for the redhair

So he’s either seeing someone properly or not talking to anybody at all. Akashi’s forward like that.

He’s very discreet about his dating life. Like one day he just announces to the Miracles that he’s engaged to the love of his life and like??? No one knows he was even seeing someone?? Maybe just midorima and kuroko. Maybe Momoi (and by association Aomine)

Akashi haaaas relationships… they’re just very selective and won’t last long if he can’t see marrying them

Eventually marries for love. I just can’t see him tagging along an arranged marriage (like his father expects) with someone if he doesn’t like them

Yes boy do clear that karmic ancestral baggage

If you want to date Akashi, you should probably not be afraid to take the lead too sometimes. He already juggles plenty of responsibilities outside the home, he appreciates if he can just let go of the reins when he’s with his s/o

Bonus bonus if you can hold an intellectual conversation with him. He also takes a keen interest in your hobbies

Akashi’s a generous, kind, faithful, and attentive lover. You’re provided for for life.

#kuroko no basket #knb #knb headcanons #generation of miracles #kiseki no sedai #kuroko #kuroko tetsuya #kise #kise ryouta #midorima #midorima shintaro #aomine #aomine daiki #murasakibara #murasakibara atsushi #akashi #akashi seijuurou #knb imagines

[orbleglorb]

@polkadotpatterson hi. using this as an excuse to talk about my shit sport.

banesball is a game similar to blaseball in the sense that the game wants you dead. however, everything is very meticulous and odd and that is because i asked myself "how could i make the worst sport ever?" and then made a spreadsheet about it

banesball does a lot of things in 3s. 3 teams play at once. there are 27 teams total (multiple of 3). there are three conferences (lawful, neutral, chaotic) and three divisions (good, neutral, evil). the fields themselves are triangles. this is because most sports do things in 2s, and in order to make it the worst sport ever i had to get rid of that

so, the full list of teams is: jacksonville librarians (location may change), jaipur crickets, portland brewers, buenos aires architects, katmai volcanoes, sapporo cranes, point nemo socialites, cedar rapids bakers, underworld gemstones, tampa gardeners, galway revelers, eureka redwoods, chicago beans, death valley omens, london watchers, seattle baristas, perth polycule, paris performers (based out of paris, TX), salem sorcerers, atlanta artists, austin musicians (location may change), new york city pigeons, nova scotia lookouts, memphis showboats, alberta rats, geneva mad scientists, and reno clowns.

the lookouts were originally the lighthouse keepers, but it was a lengthy name and calling them the "lookouts" allowed for more variation in what they do. i.e., one could be a life guard. i chose lighthouses because i was going down a wikipedia rabbit hole and apparently nova scotia has a shit ton of light houses.

The Person Pit is a pit that people come out of. these are typically missing people from all over the world (although most of the time they're from canada and the northern USA), but sometimes ppl who do not exist just kinda appear and everyone goes ok 👍. whoever shows up in the pit has been Claimed and must Play Ball. that is a much more recent development, though. The Pit has existed longer than Banesball. it also just decided it would be fun to start a Banesball team. when tulio came out of The Pit, he was injured, which was the first time that had happened in a while. those who come from the pit typically have no memory of their experiences inside of it, but tulio does. and tulio isn't saying jack shit out of fear.

i have lored some players from around the league, although i haven't really claimed a team since i am The Creator. however, i've done the most lore with the lookouts because The Person Pit is so important to me (it correlates with my OC universe). here are my thoughts on the players:

barbie nebuchadnezzar: no pronouns. prefers to go by barb. barb has lived in nova scotia barb's entire life. nobody knows how long barb has been alive, not even barb. barb is a seasoned sailor that became a lighthouse keeper, as well as the Keeper Of The Pit. barb is the only player on the lookouts that has not come from The Pit.

evelyn hassan: nothing yet </3

kit walsh: he/she. butch lesbian. pink hair and pronouns. he's the captain of the lookouts, despite being the third recruit. she's in some sort of trade profession (maybe welding or carpentry). she's the biggest supporter of everyone on his team. will hold your hand at the dentist if you asked

zaynab campbell: she/her. middle-aged(ish) ex-housewife from a lavender marriage. motherly in a sense, but grandma might be more apt. avid baker and, after her divorce, worked as an OSHA inspector up until coming out of The Pit. dating lola

lola sharp: nothing much yet :( late twenties, early 30s. peppy

tulio tailor: any pronouns, primarily uses he. cursed. he Knows. nobody knows why. likes making things out of clay and pottery

dhia bronwyn: nothing much yet. muslim & hijabi (maybe niqabi)

me and some friends have a discord server where we've made some lore for these guys! if u wanna join lmk :3 usually i go in and just add a bunch of players at once, & it's pretty silent the rest of the time. not much to do yet. there's no sim, and likely never will be, but we're having fun yes and-ing each other. i made a perchance generator for generating names and stats, as well as a name generator for teams based in areas with vastly different names than north america. both work much better on a computer.

ok infodump over 👍

#banesball #nova scotia lookouts #banesball info #i also made a rulebook (it's still a WIP tho)

[thebibi]

i LOVE all your avh and helward takes!!! also if u want... elaborate on gentleman thief vh? bc that concept is Hilarious, do you think he continued regularly robbing people as a professor w jack? and how do you think jack got involved in the criminal aspect?

Oh thank you!

I think, considering how skilled the professor is with breaking into houses, he might have been a thief. I say gentlemen thief because I imagine van Helsing was a cool and young jewelry thief who never used violence. Perhaps, his open mindedness made him seek out stealing as a thrill, but after a while it made good money too.

I think it also helped him get interested in medical school, I can imagine him discovering other doctors participate in grave robbing and wanting to know more about the human body. Like perhaps he transitioned from stealing jewelry and money to stealing for doctors, and before you know it one of his clients is funding his education!

I also wonder if in this conquest, he discovered some supernatural elements? I don't want to say he knew of vampires per say, but maybe he encountered strange medical cases that didn't add up with contemporary science, like people being buried alive, or ghost sighting, or something like that.

I can see this discovery being a traumatic event for van Helsing, so he takes it as a sign that he has to give up most of his thieving. This is where van Helsing attempts to reinvent himself as a totally honorable man. He's a doctor now, his appetite for knowledge is insatiable, he throws himself into studying all sorts of things and gains a lot of respect from the academic community! I also think this is around the time he starts to to take his faith more seriously.

However, I think..later at one point, maybe due to his son dying and his wife slipping away, I think van Helsing started to go back to his older habits of crime. This time though, he's the favorite amongst his students, he's teaching them tricks of the trade that he feels will help them become better doctors. Like breaking and entering to save a patient that no one has heard of in a few days, or pranking insufferable doctors who were prejudiced against their patients and let them die. And of course, performing illegal autopsies to determine the cause of death. At this point he is perhaps, lashing out at the injustices he's seen, in his own kooky way.

And lastly, yeah I think Jack Seward was one of those students who readily accepted van Helsing's criminal teachings! I also totally prescribe to @cattuladaily 's headcanon that the gangrene sucking incident happened when they were cutting up an illegally obtained cadaver, which is why it held such a lasting impression on him. Its funny, but Jack could have been a totally mediocre student, but the sucking of blood is what cemented him as van Helsing's favorite. Incredible.

I feel like with Jack, coming from a much stricter society, challenged van Helsing with his extremely rational mindset. And I think van Helsing responded in kind with committing crimes to prove Jack wrong and widen his world views. I think that's why Jack ultimately has to be with him at the scene of the crime, and that kind of evolved into him helping the professor and learning how to pick locks.

Anyway, that's how I see my timeline for van Helsing's backstory....hope this makes sense! Thank you so much for the ask!

#dracula daily #abraham van helsing #i love him he is so unhinged #when i think of a gentleman thief i also think of cary grant in to catch a thief #which i also recommend to anon #thebibi on vampirez #thebibi answers #ask box #anonymous #jack seward

[ventiswampwater]

Jack and David for the Headcanons PLEASSEEEE

oh u have UNLOCKED the evil demented pandora's box of my brain. I'm about to be FULLY annoying. TYSM

below are 3 pros and cons of dating my Favorite Boys Ever™

sidenote: if we're talking canon CANON, the fact that both of them are VERY dead is the MAIN and only VALID con. IMO. but I digress!!! for the sake of this list, they are very alive and very smoochable

(under the cut bc DAMN can a bitch talk. and I do not want u all to have to scroll thru a WALL of text of me bein humina humina awooooooga abt my current hyperfixation 💀 ur welcome)

anyways!! this was incredibly fun and I have tmrrw off!! so feel free to send me a character of ur choice for headcanons and I'll give u 3 pros and 3 cons of dating them. if ur so inclined!!!!

jack

3 PROS

man is goofy. GOOFY. he is so intensely unserious. the banter (both flirty or otherise) will be IMMACULATE.

SOLID movie buddy energy. since he's the first one to bring up lon chaney jr./the pentangle on the wall, I like to think he's a hammer horror movie enthusiast. and since we know that the two of them have been friends at least since the 8th grade, I find the idea of these two little dorks staying up late and catching reruns of the movies...........SO cute. so v v cute. jack's little 12-year-old ass insisting that they CAN'T MISS frankenstein meets the wolfman. no, david!! u can't go tf to sleep!! we need the LORE!!!! so anyway. he'd show u a bunch of old horror movies and point out all the weird lil details to u. get ready 2 be mst3k-ing every film. man has cable tv and chill written ALL over him.

knows his way around nyc and WILL take u to a funky lil hole-in-the-wall restaurant that serves the best sandwich u have ever had. he might forget his wallet @ his apartment and end up paying for it w/loose change he has stuffed in his jacket pockets, but goddamn was that hot pastrami incredible.

3 CONS

he's 5'7'' (this is also a pro)

a little bit of a whiny bitch. will make a mountain out of a molehill. thrives on melodrama and hyperbole. but he's right 90% of the time, so as annoying as it might be. u can't fault him too much for that

used to being the comic relief friend. chronically friendzoned. probably going 2 be a bit annoying about that. it's kinda difficult to get him to snap out of sarcastic showboat-mode. sometimes that can make him seem a bit ingenuine and detached. mild to severe performance anxiety vibes. once u crest over that. he'll trade any nervousness for comical overconfidence and it'll be off to the races. but in the interim................................lmao

david

3 PROS

SWEET himbo boy. v affectionate and complimentary dude. clear w/his intentions and fairly emotionally open. v much so gives the vibes of a guy who claims to want to have 74873848 flings before settling down........but will immediately fall head-over-heels and want to introduce u to his family. golden retriever boy

canonically!! gives good head. need I say more

has a sense of adventure. likes challenging himself and breaking up the routine. outdoorsy. he probably likes hiking. did track or soccer or smthn in high school. his sheer enthusiasm for GOING OUTSIDE will force u to get ur ass off the damn couch. u love to see it.

3 CONS

v much BIG "first person to die in a traditional horror movie"-vibes. not the best at reading situations. will bamboozle himself into a bad scenario purely bc his street-smarts are sometimes lacking. kinda clueless. it's v hot but also v dumb of him. u would think that growing up in nyc would've tempered some of that. occasionally it does. occasionally. not enough tho.

possible mama's boy/golden child. even if this is NOT true, he still lives at home. which means there WILL be tomfoolery afoot if u stay over @ that house. and VERY little privacy!! get ready for his younger siblings to find the most inconvenient ways to interrupt ur time together. ur patience and mental fortitude will be tested. u will be living in a crash course parent trap/home alone-simulator. have fun!!

u know when u were a kid and ur mom would see someone she knew @ the grocery store and talk w/them for an eternity. and u would just be standing there and waiting for her to END her conversation so that u could LEAVE. yeah. david gives me big "endless conversations in grocery store"-energy. u run into a bodega @ 9 PM to grab some chips and soda w/him. but this is his stomping ground and he somehow manages to run into 3797432989 different ppl who know AND adore him. and they've all got to ask him about how school is going. what's he majoring in again? how's the family? do u still know blah blah blah from blah blah blah? and ur just standin there sipping ur coke. which is rapidly becoming more and more room temperature w/every sip. when will it end. he's been talking about his sixth grade biology class for the last ten minutes

BONUS AND MOST OBVIOUS PROS FOR BOTH OF 'EM:

fluffy hair (x2)

there's two of them. u can and SHOULD date both of them simultaneously. IDEAL throuple situation.

#truly my guys of ALL TIME. #my bf's (real) (actual) (not clickbait) #thank u for giving me the chance to RAMBLE INCOHERENTLY abt them. I am CONSTANTLY rotating them in my fuckin mind these days #CONSTANTLY #sam speaks #ask game #an american werewolf in london

[zvaigzdelasas]

Battles of attrition are defined as those in which opposing forces do not confront each other in direct combat with the full strength of their teams but instead aim to wear each other down over a period of time. [U]nilaterally-imposed economic policy sanctions that coerce certain desired patterns of international trade and economic exchange may be cast as attempts to win a battle of attrition.

The latest headlines in the attrition front from Germany, the epicentre of the continent’s unsettled energy geopolitics after the launch of Western sanctions on Russia, seem incredible at first sight. It was only about a month ago when what seemed a dumbfounding report by Deutsche Bank predicted that "wood will be used for heating purposes where possible." The Business Insider headlined its column “Germans could switch to wood this winter to heat their homes as Russia withholds natural gas, Deutsche Bank says”.

Last week, Bloomberg’s Javier Blas tweeted with his “chart of the day” showing Google seearches for firewood ("Brennholz") surging in the past two months as Germans increasingly realize that firewood (yes, firewood!) might stand between them and a freezing winter with electricity rationing “as the country braces for natural gas shortages”. Germany’s citizens — living in the world’s pre-eminent engineering nation with its flagship BMWs and Audis in manufacturing, its world leading petrochemical sector typified by behemoth BASF and much else besides — face the prospects of surviving winter as their forebears did over 2 centuries ago, huddling around a firewood hearth. [...]

A few days after the launch of Russia’s “special military operations” in eastern Ukraine on 24th February, the U.S., U.K. and the European Union along with their closest allies (Australia, Canada, Japan, South Korea, and a few other countries) imposed the most wide-ranging economic blitzkrieg on a sovereign nation since the Second World War. The sanctions launched on Russia were meant to devastate the Russian economy and force President Vladimir Putin to sue for peace on Ukraine’s terms or even engender regime change.

Russia responded with a “roubles for gas” scheme for “non-friendly” countries (i.e. those participating in the sanctions) as a prototype for all of Russia’s major commodity exports to a hostile Western alliance. In the days after the sanctions, Russia’s rouble fell to almost half of its pre-invasion levels, its stock market was shut, and its central bank jacked up interest rates to contain the fallout. Contrary to expectations and President Joe Biden’s boast of collapsing the ‘rouble to rubble’ however, the currency soon recovered sharply. It strengthened to its highest levels in 7 years while the country’s current account surplus surged to record levels by May.

This was due only in part to the Russian central bank's actions limiting currency outflows and raising interest rates. It was primarily an outcome of the surge in the global prices of fossil fuels and industrial commodities which constitute the major commodity exports of the country. According to a Reuters report yesterday, higher oil export volumes, coupled with rising gas prices, will boost Russia's earnings from energy exports to $337.5 billion this year, a 38% rise on 2021, according to an economy ministry document seen by the newswire.

While there was some fall-off in energy exports to the Western countries, China and India rapidly increased their energy imports from Russia at discounted prices. While China is in talks with Russia to buy oil to replenish its strategic reserves according to Bloomberg, India has been refining cheaper Russian crude to then export as petroleum products to Europe and the US. [!]

In an irony that will not be lost to observers of European affairs, Robin Brooks, Chief Economist at the Institute of International Finance, says that the West is “paying a high price” for denying Russian energy to itself, although EU “exemptions” to sanctions are multiplying. Meanwhile, Russia’s financial conditions now are almost as relaxed as before the war.

He also notes that the German current account surplus “is back to levels last seen in the early 2000s, when Germany was the ‘sick man’ of Europe” adding that Germany is “sick again now” having had a growth model that was “heavily predicated on cheap Russian energy”. The Nordstream-1 gas pipeline — Germany’s main gas supply artery — running at 20% level of normal supply and the resulting Eurozone energy price shock — is Putin’s grapple-hold across the throat of Europe threatening “catastrophic industrial shutdowns” and mass layoffs.

Russia’s citizens, while poorer, do not seem to be doing so badly relative to their German neighbours. Retail spending at cafes, bars, and restaurants is doing fine. Well-heeled Muscovites might miss their I-phones and Gucci handbags under sanctions and voluntary exits by publicity-conscious Western corporations. But ordinary citizens are certainly not searching for firewood this winter or worried about being able to have hot baths.

The battle of attrition between the G-7 and Russia continues as the US Secretary of State Antony Blinken recently went on “a charm offensive in Africa to regain the US popularity which was lost ostensibly during the Trump administration, and to counter the attempts from Russia to get more African countries on their side.” In pointed remarks to the press with Mr. Blinken sitting at her side, South African Foreign Minister Naledi Pandor said that she objected to “patronizing bullying” coming from the West: “Because when we believe in freedom – as I’m saying, it’s freedom for everybody – you can’t say because Africa is doing this, you will then be punished by the United States…. One thing I definitely dislike is being told ‘either you choose this or else.’”

Making the same point more diplomatically, India’s External Affairs Minister Dr S. Jaishankar said in a June conference when he took questions from an audience: "I am one-fifth of the world's population. I am what today the 5th or 6th largest economy in the world… I feel I am entitled to have my own side. I am entitled to weigh my own interests, and make my own choices. My choices will not be cynical and transactional. They will be a balance of my values and my interests. There is no country in the world which disregards its interests."

In a speech delivered yesterday in Bangkok when attending a India-Thailand Joint Commission meeting, the minister defended India’s crude oil imports from Russia. He referred to the surge in energy prices across the world due to the Russia-Ukraine war and said: “We have been very open and honest about our interest. I have a country with a per capita income of USD 2000, these are not people who can afford higher energy prices. It’s my moral duty to ensure the best deal.”

In a blistering article last week headlined “Washington has only itself to blame for growing de-dollarization trend”, China’s Global Times stated: “The thought the US may move to grab anybody's assets who refuses to obey Washington's dictates is truly unnerving, which is now inducing more countries to diversify their reserve assets away from US dollars.” Russia, China and India have been engaged in efforts to facilitate trade via the use of their national currencies and a potential BRICS basket as the basis of commodity trade among those outside the Western alliance.

Potential future members of the BRICS bloc such as Saudi Arabia, the United Arab Emirates, Iran, Indonesia, Nigeria and Thailand have made clear — either overtly or by their neutrality in trade and diplomatic relations with Russia and the West – that they will not “pick sides” as India’s Dr. Jaishanker put it. There is little reason to believe that the EU or the US can browbeat developing countries to join in the anti-Russia sanctions.

Financial and trade sanctions on Russia by Western protagonists has led to an economic battle of attrition the results of which remain uncertain and far-reaching. It looks increasingly likely that Russia will achieve at least its immediate goals in the military battlefield in the eastern and southern parts of Ukraine, albeit at great cost of men and materiel. Yet the costs of the Western economic sanctions on Russia which have boomeranged are far more consequential to people’s lives and livelihoods around the world.

The Western alliance, led by the US under the Biden administration, offers no prospects for a negotiated solution to the Russia-Ukraine conflict as called for by Henry Kissinger at the Davos conference in May. Indeed, the mainstream media and Western political leaders have continued escalating the narrative of a Russian military defeat with a seeming endless supply of funds and arms by the Biden administration to Ukraine.

Pensioners and poorer sections of society across Western Europe and the UK, unable to afford skyrocketing heating and electricity bills, will be the most affected proximate victims. But even worse injuries to people’s lives and livelihoods will be among the vast populations of the developing countries that live in poverty or on the edges of it. The surge in the price of food, fertilizer and fuel as a result of the sanctions will punish the far-flung innocent poor the most.

Yeowch, when even Forbes is turning on your political class & waving this big of a white flag, you know youve lost (18 Aug 22)

[baiyunli]

would u consider posting more snippets of the retirement fic. pretty please. its so good!

for sure!! most of the fully-written scenes don't make sense without context, but i have one near the beginning, when jack still hasn't told nico what he's looking for here and nico's just angry and still hurt from everything jack had done before. no idea why i picked the wings for luke lol but here:

There were moments, after Jack was traded and before Luke signed with Detroit, where Nico would look at Luke and all he saw was Jack. 

He never thought they looked similar: Luke was a head taller and not as talkative in the half-charming, half-flippant way that Jack was, but in certain lights, during warmups or after practice or in the middle of a goal celebration, Nico reached out and saw someone else.

He knew Jack was gone, but it didn’t stop Nico from seeing him everywhere. He’d rubbed off onto Luke, his mannerisms and locker room nicknames and pregame routine, and Nico was just tired of always looking for someone who was never his, tired of coming up empty.

The first year afterwards, Nico couldn’t even look at his old locker: as if he was the only one responsible for Jack’s leaving and the guilt was close to crushing him, one of those quiet, tragic hurts he never truly knew how to share. He’d look at Luke and see the same heartbreak on his face.

Luke’s gone now, swept away in offseason free agency. Nico is happy that he’s playing well, at least. The Wings are good. Better than the Devils right now. And the Canucks, but that part speaks for itself.

“He had an awesome season,” says Nico. Second place in Norris voting. “Tell him I said congratulations.”

Jack grins. “Obviously. Thanks for taking care of him,” he says. “After I got traded. Like, I think it was the first time he actually had to learn how to cook, and shit. God knows I couldn’t have taught him myself.”

“I had to get him out of ordering takeout somehow. He was going to die otherwise.”

Late twenties and early thirties blend in Nico’s brain. Now, thirty years old is far enough in the rearview mirror that everything in the interim feels the same, a foggy lacuna from the first time they qualified for the playoffs to their first Cup win. The years when they thought nothing could hurt them, that the worst had passed long ago, young and stupid and too reckless to care about the idea that the future might not swing in their favour. And even off the ice: nighttime drives on the turnpike, the closest they could get to the end of the world. The hum of tires along the rumble strip, watching the light hug the soft planes of Jack’s face. Nico had tried so hard to stay away from Jack, those years.

“It wasn’t that bad,” Jack says in self-defense. He raises his hands. “We cooked sometimes.”

“For loose definitions of ‘cooked.’ And ‘sometimes.’”

Jack makes a face. “You make it sound a lot worse than it was. I got it together eventually. When it stopped being—okay, I guess. That I didn’t know how to be an adult. And I couldn’t get away with it anymore.” He worries at his lower lip with his teeth, folds his hands in his lap. “I wanted to—” his voice stumbles, stops. “Never mind.”

There’s a curl of hair falling into his eyes that Nico wants to brush away. Nico wants too much: he wants to ask Jack to finish the sentence, wants to say why didn’t you talk to me for five fucking years, wants to know why Jack came to his apartment if not to apologize for the last five years of silence. 

He wants to put his fist through the wall, kick something, but he’s almost forty and should know better, so really he wants to go outside for a long walk until his throat no longer itches. He wants to crawl out of his skin until he’s so far away he can’t see Jack. He wants Jack to leave and he wants to stop him from ever leaving again. He just wants to hear him say sorry.

“Sure,” says Nico, curt. “Good for you.”

Jack wavers. “What?”

He rubs his forehead. “Jack, I just. I’m glad you’re doing better, but I still don’t know how long you’re planning to be here.”

Nico hears Jack’s breath hitch. “Not that long,” he answers, and then he flashes his brightest smile, all-American and pearly white, to make up for the pause before his reply. “I’m—sorting some stuff out, that’s all. Told Quinn it was unfinished business. But I can go. If you don’t, uh. If you don’t want me.”

“It’s—no,” Nico responds. He runs a hand through his hair and does not admit that Jack Hughes is all he’s ever wanted. “You can stay.” 

Jack looks down at the table. “I’ll get it together,” he says, quieter, and it strikes Nico, for a second, the reality of it. “I promise. I’ll get my shit together soon.”

During Jack's whole first season with the Canucks, Nico dreamed about having him back in New Jersey, eating dinner with him and falling asleep on the couch before Jack could make it back to his own apartment. And now Jack’s here, eating his food, staying in his apartment, and Nico thinks that his most self-pitying dreams didn’t do shit to prepare him for it. “I didn’t. I’m not asking you to fulfill any promises,” he tells Jack. “Do whatever you have to. But the season starts soon.”

“Soon,” echoes Jack, his face shuttering. “You’re right.” He pokes at the rest of his dinner. He plays with a noodle, twirls it around his fork and drops it back in the takeout box.

“Jack,” Nico says. “Are you—is there something wrong?”

“No,” Jack says, too fast, brittle. “Not something wrong, I just, uh. I have to make some decisions. Tired of trying to be an adult, I guess.” He holds up the leftover takeout. “You want me to pop this in the fridge, or do you have a container I can put it in?”

#hrpf for ts #untitled redacted retirement fic project #yun replies

[lavenoon]

I realize that I'm not quite sure what your timezone is so wishing you a 'good night' might not be accurate... So hello *from* the night instead! Hi, Luce <3 Things are a little rough atm BUT I started thinking about that funky little Other Agent and thought I might share!

Since you called him a potential "Other" agent, I thought his codename could be Jack! The initial idea being, of course, "Jack-of-all-trades" or maybe even "Jackrabbit", but the more I thought of it, there's... a LOT of story tale Jacks, to say the least. It would be funny for him to change the "reason" behind his codename when asked - 'Jack' cuz he's got a broad range of skills! Cuz he's fast! Cuz he's good at taking down enemies much bigger than him - and everybody just ends up wondering if he deadass used his own name knowing nobody would REALLY know (bonus points if he's known for being shit at naming things).

I also thought it would be a funny dichotomy for Robin, the STAR of the agency, to be seen around with just. This Dude. Basic 'Jack'.

I was also thinking that the agent gives me Command Centre vibes! I can see him manning like Real-Time info acquisition and situation analysis. If a situation Arises, he could be the one recruiting the nearest agents into action, giving info about the situation or about up and coming backup! Though I'm not sure if that'd make him more like "staff" than an agent... Alternatively, of course, if there's an Immediate Crisis, Jack could be your best bet at handling it Decent even without much to go off of. The sort of guy that's never Bad to put in a mission, especially if there's a lot Unknown. Maybe he's not as Field-involved like Moon or Robin, but I could also see him acting as like long-distance backup, maybe with a rifle - eyes in the air, so to speak!

Longwinded brain go BRR but I hold up Thoughts if Any of them at all appeal to you! I gotta get back to late night work, but I feel rejuvenated now after blabbing, and hope you're doing well! <3 -🌻 Daye

Gonna be about 9AM when I post this! Had a bit of a rough awakening, but meds are starting to kick so I'm doing a li'l better by now <3 Hope work goes well for you! Hope you get to rest soon, too!

Also taking your thoughts eagerly, here goes my conviction not to do anything with him lmao

I like him as command center guy! Robin doesn't mingle much with other field agents, but it would make sense they at least sometimes talk to the guy providing mission memos and organizing urgent changes and shit Still hard to be articulate the thoughts are foggy but I do love that idea very much, just Robin's one point of more regular contact next to Dusk. Makes that reveal comic even funnier if "Jack" really just assumed like. Dude you really hang with one guy despite me and you don't even know he has a work partner? lmao

Maybe Jack is his second name - people ask him "did you really use your first name as code name??" and he truthfully goes "no (:" and he's just another guy the higher ups sigh about but let it go because he still does his job well, and not being a field agent the code name isn't as important

Still no promises he'll play a big role but I'm keeping him in my pocket as OC now lmao, personal brain blorbo that only exists because he looked polite after I decided to give him some hair fgdhjs

Gonna continue resting and chill and hope brain starts working properly at some point, but yea wishing u a good night! <3

#answer let luce #anonymous #Daye asks #accidentally undercover #*shakes you affectionately* how dare you enable me!! dgshfds #an OC i did not project major parts of my personality onto it's been ages since I've done that lmao #wanna answer ao3 comments now wish my brain luck

[goldenmisfits]

what makes the golden knights ur fav team?

I gotta be honest and tell you they aren't my favorite team 🫣 at first I was really only a fan of billiam, who I liked from cbj. and a bunch of their draft picks, a lot of which were traded away (rip nick suzuki, ur not dead ur just a hab). what got me paying attention to them this year, particularly these playoffs, was definitely jack eichel. as u might be able to tell from my many gifsets. I've liked him since he was drafted to buffalo. I've watched many stinkers just for him lol.

I will say they're definitely my favorite of all the teams who made the playoffs this year!

#some of the trades they've made did not endear me to the team but I appreciated jack being able to get his surgery and blossom there #this blog is just a side blog i made even before the whole misfit line thing took off #i never actually expected to use it but vgk stole my heart these playoffs #I hadn't been watching a lot of hockey for various reasons but these guys just dragged me back #anonymous #answered

[faarkas]

15 questions for 15 mutuals

tagged by the lovely @rosebarsoap to do this lil game and I'm trying to be better about doing my tags sooo.

saying that I am already late and everybody has been tagged so. I shan't tag anybody my apologies,

1. are you named after anyone?

Naur but I have a middle name that is also my aunts middle name. :3

2. when was the last time you cried?

Like PROPER cried??? genuinely no idea. I used to cry really easily but for a long time its been literally 3 tears and then the rest just suck back up. I get choked up really easy but no tears allowed. On that note the latest season of queer eye has been hitting so hard. everybody go watch.

3. do you have kids?

no and I don't ever want them. I love kids I feel a drive to protect them and I'll babysit any day but I would be an absolutely terrible mother I'm too anxious and like. hot headed to have one of my own. Also a lot of my health issues are genetic and I wouldn't want to put anybody through that.

4. do you use sarcasm a lot?

uhhh maybe?? probably?? idk ask nat. or my mother. I try to be sarcastic in a dry funny way and not like an overly mean way. does not mean i always succeed tho :/

5. what sports do you play/have you played?

I've worked with horses for... 18 years?? so. heh. didn't want to or have the money to do anything else after i got involved with them.

6. what’s the first thing you notice about other people?

Like. body language. and then eyes. theres so much u can learn about people just by the way they hold themselves yk

7. eye colour?

brown. >:)

8. scary movies or happy endings?

happy endings. i need joy in my life. I like Some kind of spooky movies the older I get but largely I just want something chill. the like 1995-2012 romcom era is my heaven. CAN WE START RLY BRINGING THOSE MOVIES BACK PLEASE!

9. any special talents?

?? idk ig I know how to pull hay and get it off wagons quickly. I can look at like a solid wall of hay bales and go Yeah THATS the one that needs to come out and then either I or my friend will pull it and it'll bring half the wall down. we call it hay jenga but the goal is to get as much down as possible as fast as possible

10. where were you born?

west coast canada. do not live there anymore tho i swapped coasts :(

11. what are your hobbies?

writing, gaming, modding, sewing, giffing, baking, bothering all my mutuals, riding,,,,I am a jack of creative trades

12. do you have any pets?

two ponies, a big ass dog, and 4 cats. two of which are maine coons so. big ass cats. when u see me crowing about eric and iris in the tags of a post...i am talking about them :))

13. how tall are you?

5 foot. maybe 5'1". tiny. literally on saturday one of the moms at the barn bought a new western saddle cover and was like hilary u could fit in this jump in and i honestly think I might have been able to.

14. favourite subject in school?

i really did not enjoy school tbh im rly not an academic but maybe history.

15. dream job?

the answer to this question has evaded me for nearing 24 years. at one point in time (age like. 4-11) i would have KILLED to be a thoroughbred jockey but nowadays...idk man. if I could do something with horses that would be great. thats my one true skillset baby but mein health....

#this is so horse centric oh my god #hil.txt #tagged #ty rosie <333

[mathiwrites]

Once you get this, you have to say five things you like about yourself, publicly. Then you have to send this to ten of your favourite followers (non-negotiable, positivity is cool~) 🌈🌈 (perfect timing you liking my ask/tag game post, I needed to figure out who would be person #10 lol)

Ahhh ty for tagging me! I love these games :D

I'm very organized, it's very relaxing to me and it's such a beneficial skill to enjoy.

I appreciate my creative problem solving -- it's saved my ass so many times irl, and in writing I feel blessed that I have this superpower.

Helicopter dog-mom; I'm sure dog parent takes care of their babies, but personally, I ended up a single dog parents and it's not always easy being the only one your pet can rely on. I'm so proud of how far I've come with my furbaby.

Jack of all trades, master of none -- honestly, no complaints at being decently good at everything without being the best. It's a small sense of accomplishment when trying something new! Then the plateau happens and its rip me

Rizzlord LMAO and this only applies iRL bc I'm super awkward online, but I get along with pretty much everyone in social settings and I'm a great social lubricant in new environments. I'm defs the personality hire because of this LOL

Uhhh, I don't have many followers, I might only have the exact number so look out ya'll I'm coming @ u!!

#asks #ahhh i love these #send asks #ty for tagging me! #tagging game

[girlnextmorgue]

How the Creeps React to a Newbie

NOTICE: This post is a reupload from my old Creepypasta fanfiction blog (now my main blog). If you've seen it before, that's probably because it was posted there first! I pinky promise that I'm not stealing anything, simply moving my old work here for organization purposes.

ORIGINALLY POSTED 8/30/21

-

BG anon asked: Hi hi!! I came across your blog not too long ago and absolutely fell in love with your mansion hcs and creeps rooms hcs! Could I request some hcs of the reader having just joined the mansion, like how would different creeps react to them, who would hang out with them etc if thats not too much? Thanks, love you! -BG anon 🌸

hello bg anon!! thank u so much, im so glad you like my hcs even though they can be kind of incoherent. this is gonna be formatted kind of differently than my usual bullet point hcs, so i hope that you dont mind that too much!! i have a lot of ideas for this concept omg.. okay, i hope you enjoy these!!

––––––––

Generally, the Creeps are all gonna be a bit hesitant to accept a newcomer. Additions to the Slender Mansion are super rare; Slender has tons of proxies and connections, but only the people that he trusts the most are allowed into the mansion despite it being a sort of safe haven. Everyone is going to be a bit put off by you joining the rag tag crew that lives there, but their reactions are all different.

Nina is the most outgoing of the group living in the mansion, so she's bound to be one of the first people to talk to you. She's also probably going to be the first person that's nice to you. Nina is a people person, and she has a lot to say, so even if you're pretty quiet she talks enough for the both of you! She's also the person that will show you around and introduce you to everyone, even if the rest of her housemates aren't particularly happy about it.

LJ would also be pretty quick to speak to you, if he's even present at the mansion when you arrive. Yes, the cliche candy offer is something he does in my book. If you take it, you'll probably end up in the infirmary with EJ. This is probably one of the best ways to get to talking with EJ, since it's kind of hard to catch him and he isn't much for conversation anyway. If you don't take the candy, then don't worry about that, because there are more ways to meet EJ than getting really sick.

Nina would most definitely introduce you to Jane and Clockwork, while simultaneously inviting you along to some sort of hangout, whether it be a sleepover or a killing spree (though Jane would be hesitant to participate in the latter). Natalie is relatively easygoing, so she'd be quick to start a conversation with you about whatever interests the two of you might share. She's kind of a jack of all trades in my mind, so if you have a hobby then she's probably at least tried it once. Jane is a little harder to talk to. She's a colder person and she isn't quick to trust, but if you end up befriending Nina and Natalie then she starts to warm up to you.

Jane is also good friends with EJ, so if you catch the two having a conversation and are comfortable enough to try to worm your way in, you've earned yourself an additional acquaintance.

Toby is the type to pull some sort of sadistic prank on you on your first night at the mansion. If you react with anger or disgust (depending on what he does), then he'll continue to prank the living shit out of you and try to make your life a living hell until you report to Slenderman about it. Doing that basically guarantees you're on Toby's shit list, even if he can't do anything about it because Slender would kill him, and even if it was kind of his own fault that he ended up getting in trouble. If you're chill about the prank then yeah, Toby will end up with at least some interest in you. He'd probably tell BEN and Jeff about it, and maybe he'd even invite you to hang out with the trio (much to the chagrin of Jane).

The aforementioned pair of idiots were more likely than not gaming on the couch when you entered the mansion and probably didn't pay much attention to your introduction, but that was also probably because Nina was the one doing it. If you do end up hanging out with Jeff and BEN (either through Toby or through being paired up with them for a mission or for chores), you'll have to prove you're worthy of being graced by the presence of the famous Jeff the Killer and his best bud BEN_Drowned. This would either be through video games or through some other form of a challenge, so pick your poison!

Brian is a very easy person to talk to. You probably ended up meeting him in the kitchen or something, I can see him hanging out at the counter with a book in his hand or something. He might have sparked a conversation with a joke, maybe about whatever prank Toby managed to pull on you, and it's just so easy to be friends with the dude. He gets along with mostly everyone, and it's very rare that he meets someone he doesn't like, so yeah. He's probably one of the nicest people in the mansion.

Befriending Tim is a bit of a harder task. Tim is most definitely put in charge of giving you a legitimate tour of the mansion (Nina can't really be trusted), but if he finds you obnoxious or annoying he will not like you. Even Jane calls him a tightass, and she's another person that has zero patience for bullshit. If you do end up managing to get on his good side, congratulations! Please tell me how the fuck you managed to do that! It's especially surprising if you've gotten close with Toby & company, because Tim has no tolerance for that type of behavior.

Liu is a very introverted person, so he's a bit hard to get around to talking to. Conversations with people he doesn't know tend to make him anxious, so you'll probably need to butt in when he's talking to Natalie, Jane, or EJ. Once you get into that conversation and he finds that he's comfortable around you, there is no stopping him from talking. It's definitely refreshing to have a relatively normal conversation about books he's read or the plants that he's taking care of compared to the chaos of the rest of the mansion.

Helen is probably one of the hardest people to get close to. He only really talks to Liu, and that's when he isn't off somewhere drawing or painting. Nina didn't even get to introduce you to each other because he wasn't anywhere to be found. You'd probably have to end up talking to him yourself. It's not that conversation makes him uncomfortable, he just finds everyone annoying at the beginning. If you bug him enough he'll definitely warm up to you, since he's the type that waits for people to come to him, even if he wants to pretend he hates everyone.

#creepypasta #creepypasta x reader #creepypasta headcanons #jeff the killer #jeff the killer x reader #jeff the killer headcanons #ben drowned #ben drowned x reader #ben drowned headcanons #nina the killer #nina the killer x reader #nina the killer headcanons #laughing jack #laughing jack x reader #laughing jack headcanons #eyeless jack #eyeless jack x reader #eyeless jack headcanons #jane the killer #jane the killer x reader #jane the killer headcanons #clockwork #clockwork x reader #clockwork headcanons #ticci toby #ticci toby x reader #ticci toby headcanons #masky #masky x reader #masky headcanons

[jiminrings]

can we get a fratboy Jimin and good girl oc with pinning from both sides 👀 ahhhh thank u in advance love ur writing!!

cherry king

drabble week: day four

drabble week masterlist

pairing: fratboy!jimin x goody two-shoes!reader

wordcount: 3k

glimpse: "y-you uhm, you-? y'know, you like... doing that? is that why it's your nickname?"

feedback + support mean the world to me!!

“next!”

great!! the line’s moving :D

that’s only like the 87th time jimin has heard the word next and it makes him wonder how much more would it take him to bring him to the front

(it’s actually only been 14 times and jimin might just be a self-admitted impatient bitch!!!)

he understands that yes, it’s ten in the evening!!! and reasonably-large stores/pharmacies like these can have less staff at the time compared to ten in the morning

sure, checkout machines and cashier lanes could be broken down!! or they could just not be open at all

jimin gets that alright, maybe the self-checkout machines are close at this time of the night because it is ten in the evening

what’s not clicking in his mind, however is that at the exact time that he comes here

as in the EXACT time that he’s here (!!!) — there happens to be dozens of people in a store at ten in the evening, and there happens to be a grand total of one (1) cashier lane

atleast random store music would be entertaining :((( all he hears are the beeps of a scanner and the chatter of groups of people who came here

jimin was eavesdropping on some guys in front of him and he wAS invested but lmao turns they were just discussing the plot of die hard or any testosterone-jacked movie like it

he’s also tried looking at the smaller middle-aged woman’s phone in front of him who’s scrolling through her facebook feed, but quickly decides against continuing it

because what if u could see his face and when she turns it off, she’d see a college guy deeply-invested in the baloney article she was reading about how subway sandwiches are the work of the devil

so uh yeah he’s just looking everywhere besides the front, back, and the sides of him and in all angles basically

he’s,,,,, aimlessly scrolling through his instagram feed he’s already scrolled through tHREE times and his explore’s page a little too dry

it’s a good thing that jimin’s entirely sure he’s the nosiest person out of this line and no one else is trying to figure him out

might be wrong though

“cherry king?”

hold the fuck on

jimin’s eyes widen, head snapping up and clueless to the fact that he doesn’t look discreet at all, and his head-cocking’s the most movement he’s done the whole time in this store

WHO’S SAYING HIS NICKNAME?????

it can’t be a coincidence either because as far as he’s concerned, there isn’t anything named cherry king that’s being sold here

there is literally NO other plausible scenario happening here besides the fact that someone who knows him is in the store!!!!

his gaze falls to the person behind him, brows knitted in confusion until it clicks

oh

that was you?

“jimin? huh, it really is you. i thought i was losing my mind for a second.”

“y/n?”

okay maybe hE’S the one who’s losing his mind here

he knows you!! you’re the smart girl in his year who’s known for being pristine and stuff!! you’re like the good-est girl he’s ever known and heard of

.... quick question lads is that weird to know someone by

“you could’ve just called me by my name, y’know,” jimin chuckles heartily, still a little dumbfounded to see you here but he’s grateful for the interaction nonetheless

you look casual today?? like you still look like yourself but everyone else would think it’s an out-of-body experience to see you out of your pretty dresses and monochromatic get-ups

it’s you..,.. in a hoodie three sizes larger than your size with your pristine shoes traded in for socked-feet wearing slides

jimin thinks that you look like grace under pressure

“i wasn’t sure,” you smile right back and it’s the first time he realizes that there’s glasses atop your nosebridge, softening your image more from the usual composed look you carried

“how were you sure enough to say my nickname out-loud though?”

jimin questions you, bringing light to how he’s wearing a plain white shirt and is looking as relaxed as ever with how he’s dressed — his hair long enough to be put into a messy sprout of a bun

you clear your throat, the amusement bubbling in your scratchy throat

“you have yourself as your lockscreen, jimin.”

oh my gOD

he winces when you say it, eyes screwing shut in embarrassment that he whines in pain with how direct you put it

“n-no way — fuck you respectfully, y/n. i-i’m not- i’m changing it right now!!”

does he look the vainest person alive rn

the way he has a mini freakout entertains you to your core, giggles unable to be suppressed as he finds the latest-taken picture he has of dogs that he comes across with

that’s 10/10 an experience he doesn’t want to repeat again

“it’s okay. i won’t tell anyone.”

he hears you reassure and he believes you, a flustered blush on his cheek still as he coughs to make up for a diversion topic he couldn’t think of

frankly, you’re getting bored too and jimin’s the only form of entertainment you have because using your phone atm would be too disorienting

“what are you doing here, by the way?”

your head tilts in query and he’s relieved that you address something else, not being relieved seconds later when he realizes his answer

“just a little supply run for our frat. we weren’t supposed to run out of things for three more days, so this is just a lil emergency haul for awhile.”

you nod in understanding, glancing down at his basket and uh

uhm 1/4 of the space is literally occupied by boxes of condoms

....

......

jimin’s confused to why you turn silent, thinking that he must’ve gotten boring to continue talking to until he follows your gaze to his basket

NO WAY?!]>|>]%%[%]%]

“i-it’s not l-like that!!!” he crouches and immediately gets the food and the bottles of shampoo and conditioner to bury the condoms in the bottom of the pile, attractively getting more attention from you who’s ready to let it go

“i-it’s not — it’s ours — n-no!! t-they just gave me a list and i just put it because it’s on the list b-but like it wasn’t my-...”

how many more times will the universe fuck jimin up in front of the person he has a lil happy crush on

you only smile meekly, tilting your head and he thinks this is the part where you tell him how much of a douche he is

"y-you uhm, you-? y'know, you like... doing that? is that why it's your nickname?"

:O

“t-that?” jimin clarified albeit confused, thinking back to his nickname as he tries to rapidly connect the dots to not look like a fool

cherry king? that?? what do you-

WAIT WHAT

“nO!! o-of course not!!”

he almost shrieks and his voice sounds ultimately defensive, shaking his head no

why does he look so frantic

“hey, hey, i believe you! — calm down, jimin. you don’t have to explain anything to me.”

whew

fuck

but he argues that it iS the truth though!!!

but why won’t you just ask him why he’s called cherry king though >:(

you’re already content with the silence after the conversation but he isn’t, still wanting more

is it so bad that he wants redemption D:

“how about you? what are you doing here?”

you don’t answer instantly and it’s because you’re nudging jimin to continually walk, the cashier looking much more visible now as he’s nearer in line

he takes a look at the handful of things that’s in your basket —

electrolytes, hot pockets, soup, cup noodles and fever patches...?

“oh. i think i’m running a fever.”

what???

what are you doing here aLONE if you think you’re running a fever???

he’s not gonna lie about the fact that you don’t look too good

what if you pass out and no one’s there for you and all the graveyard shift employees do is put a wet floor sign around your figure???

“y/n?? what are you doing here alone then?? are you oUT of your mind??”

the panic in jimin’s voice is clear as day and you’re a little startled, instead responding to tapping him on the shoulder to point that he’s already the one on the cashier

what he does is grab your basket before he is, putting it in front of the conveyor belt because he couldn’t even wait for it to roll out

“i said i think i’m running a fever.”

jimin stops from simultaneously rummaging for his rewards card and putting his items on the counter to unceremoniously drop the box of condoms down jUST to put his hand on your forehead

“you are.”

you surely don’t think low of jimin but you can’t help be surprised either at his concern for you when this is the only time you’ve had a conversation with him!!!

“you drove here?” he asks in seriousness, sending you a look while waiting for the total amount

“walked. the airconditioning makes me even more sick,” you answer with no fuss because even thinking about car fresheners while you’re sporting a fever makes you want to gag. “let me-...”

jimin already pays for both your items in cash, getting them bagged separately as he’s not gonna take no for an answer for what he’s gonna propose next

“then i’ll keep the windows down. i’ll drive you back to your dorm.”

he grabs both your bags in one hand and uses the other to beckon you over, holding you still because it’s dark out and a fever vision wouldn’t exactly help

it’s only when he straps you in and (true to his word) puts the windows down and starts his car that you start asking

“why are you doing this for me?”

why IS he doing this for you??

jimin thinks about his answer in a second

“would you do the same for me?”

well

if you were in front of him at a godforsaken line, had yourself as your lockscreen, realize that jimin’s behind you with a fever and is by himself in a store at 10 in the evening

“of course i would.”

jimin smiles, steering away from his parking spot

“then i would too.”

( ♡ )

maybe you’re thinking of jimin

no wait you’re dEFINITELY thinking of jimin

you’re much better now and your fever’s already subsided enough for you to go back to class!!!

the whole interaction with him was three days ago and maybe your head is just full of him at this point

“are you sure you’re okay to handle this by yourself??”

jimin worries when he drops your bag to your hands, briefly coming inside your dorm to set it down

“mhmm. i’ll just sleep it out.”

“i think if you’re missing a couple of steps.”

you snort as his paranoid features, waving him off. “i’ll eat. then go to the bathroom. and then sleep.”

okay good enough

“what if this just-“ jimin trails off, his expansive mind suddenly running as he points to your chest, “stops????”

cute

“i have a smart watch.”

“would you put me as one of the emergency contacts? please?”

he’s making you take down his number without malice because jeez he’s gENUINELY worried!!!!

it may not always be great sharing a house with his frat brothers, but he knows that if he has a fever, atleast half of them would dote over him and you have atleast one who would go into hysterics!!! it’e a full package!!

“i’ll be okay, jimin. i’ll call you when i need someone to hand me my puke bucket.”

“please do. i’m not even kidding. get better now because i miss your dresses.”

o_O

uhm

“n-no i meant your usual style!! wait, not that there’s anything wrong w-with your style right now. i-i was-...”

“yeah. i miss them too. now go home, jimin.”

“you sure?”

u never really had the impulse to invite a guy to go inside your place but maybe now you do

“mhmm. drive safe.”

okay

:-)

“good night, y/n. call me whenever.”

classes were a bit rough today because you’re still easing yourself on getting back to the groove of things, but it was tolerable!!!

you’re getting your key out of your backpack when a lock clicks open a couple doors away from you, the hinge noisily squeaking

it’s jimin who leaves it, with seri who’s the actual occupant of the dorm leaning on the doorframe

“y/n—!”

he squeaks the moment his eyes land on you

your hand automatically waves, the same meek smile for him to see

“jimin.”

( ♡ )

the last interaction you had with him is still on jimin’s mind, a whole week later

it’s been bothering him recently that you know what it looks like the last time around!!!! but he could swear up and down that it wasn’t

he just feels this great urge to explain even if you haven’t asked

“oh. so we have to move out for the time-being?”

jimin clarifies with namjoon, the head of the frat, and he’s met with a solemn nod

it makes sense!!!

the house got checked today and there were mULTIPLE fire hazards!!! and it needs to be fumigated anyway under new campus protocol so it indeed makes sense

practically everyone's going home because it’s a long weekend anyway because of a holiday

and he’s not sure if he wants to take the same route.

“hi.”

jimin squeaks the moment you open your door, surprise evident on your face but not shock to the point you’d close the door on him

“jimin?”

okay maybe he’s gonna go straight to explaining

“frat house needed to be closed because of some complications, and it wouldn’t be open to us for another three days. most of the guys are coming home,” jimin clears his throat, his head down while he shyly scratches the back of his ear, “i have one, but i’m not sure if i wanna.”

oh

it’s that problem

it takes one, two seconds before it all registers in your head, nodding surely

“you can take my bed. i’ll take the couch, it’s a pull-out anyways.”

you open the door for him widely and the only thing you ask if he’s had dinner and if he’d like some

god you’re really throwing him in a loop here

it’s after a batch of your cooking that jimin’s only ache is why you were the way that you were, half-dazed the whole time he’s met you properly

“why do you never ask me?”

“hmm?” you hum as you dry the dishes that you’ve used, wanting to get it done as soon as possible so your full attention would be on him

no, actually. jimin WANTS you to pry!!

he wants you to worm your way into his privacy and into the confines of his mind

but it seems like you’ve already did without even asking.

“ask me why i’m called the cherry king.”

you tilt your head in confusion, that time playing in your head of why jimin looked confused when you didn’t continue to ask further

maybe you’ll indulge him

“why are you called the cherry king?”

jimin smiles, leaning to your couch with his arms relaxed

“we did secret santa for christmas at our frat house. taehyung thought it would be nice if he pranked me by gifting me a jar full of cherries, but i thought that was his actual gift, and i liked it to the point that i finished it in one sitting.”

tHAT’S ACTUALLY PRETTY ENDEARING

cute, even

“ask me why i came out of seri’s apartment last week.”

oh that’s.,.,. that’s a bit higher in level compared to nicknames

“why did you come out of seri’s apartment last week?”

“because seri’s the ex-girlfriend of hoseok, my frat brother, and he wanted me to return all her stuff because he doesn’t want to be reminded of his cheating ex.”

well that was definitely weighted

jimin plays with the hem of his shirt, the words tumbling out of his mouth

“ask me why i love you.”

why do you wHAT

your mouth drops open, the new position you took on the other end of the couch taking an impact on him

“w-why do you love me?”

jimin’s a lot of things but he’s not drunk tonight

he doesn’t know why he’s letting his feelings slip either, but it’s the bottomless need that he feels when he’s around you

“i feel wanted. i feel needed.”

he smiles cheerfully even if he feels shy dropping this on you all of a sudden

“not sure if you want me nor need me, but i feel welcome with you if that makes sense.”

:)

“you just make me feel loved, i guess.”

jimin looks at you for the first time since he’s opened his mouth, an equally fond look on your face

you said no words but what jimin receives is a gentle tug, your hand on the side of his face until he’s leaning on your shoulder

“i wanna know what's up there.”

he points a finger to your temple, an amused lilt to his tone, “surprise me.”

it’s an unfolding of things that was weeks in the making but months in developing, the distant glances leading you to recognize jimin in the shop in the first place

“i feel the exact same with you,” you answer honestly and it makes his laugh from his chest, his cheeks warm and his heart content

and you just wanna suspend yourselves in this moment forever

“oh! and if i were to lose my virginity to anyone at the moment, it'd be you!!”

...

....

jimin swats at your shoulder to which you only giggle at, a toothy smile on display as this is the warmest he’s ever felt

“i wasn’t kidding!!!”

you yawn when you defend yourself, predicting that you’d fall asleep sooner or later on the couch, but for the time-being, you just stroke jimin’s hair to soothe the both of you

jimin is now the furthest thing from sleepy

"what? you told me to surprise you!!"

#drabble week #jimin imagine #jimin imagines #jimin oneshot #jimin oneshots #jimin drabble #jimin drabbles #jimin au #jimin x reader #jimin x y/n #jimin fanfic #park jimin imagine #park jimin oneshot #park jimin x reader #bts jimin oneshot #jimin writing #jimin angst #jimin angst imagine #jimin fluff #jimin fluff imagine