#also which YA novel is this ripping off? i know its one of them. probably several of them.

[rosymorns]

diversity win! the fae prince who enslaved you is bisexual!

#i hate this choices story and i hate that im like 'oooh time to read my garbage!' #also which YA novel is this ripping off? i know its one of them. probably several of them. #carly.txt

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

reading update: july 2023

I don't have a cool and witty opening for this one. I read a fuck of a lot of books this month and I want to tell you about them LET'S GO

Black Water Sister (Zen Cho, 2021) - Black Water Sister has a very fun premise: a closeted lesbian and unemployed recent graduate moves back to Malaysia with her parents and is already having a bad enough time when she starts hearing the voice of her dead grandmother, who turns out to have been deeply involved in supernatural organized crime. our hapless protagonist becomes a medium against her will, and has to navigate to world of Malaysian spirits and superstition to lay her grandma to rest. unfortunately the actual style of the story wasn't more me; although definitely adult fiction, the prose is breezy in a way I affiliate strongly with YA, which is not to my personal taste but is still so hashtag valid. if you're one of the countless people trying to make that jump from YA to adult fiction and you like queer urban fantasy then Black Water Sister might be a great fit for you, although I should provide a warning for a pretty surprisingly graphic near-rape in the book's climax that really took me by surprise in a story that's otherwise pretty zany in its violence.

The Bride Test (Helen Hoang, 2019) - I think I said last month that Alexis Hall's A Lady for a Duke was the best so far of the romance-novel-every-month scheme I'm trying to pull off this year. the Bride Test has pretty swiftly displaced it; have I finally discovered the really good romance novels? (worry not; I know what I'm reading for August and my hopes are. low.) our two protagonists, Mỹ/Esme (her chosen American/English name) and Khai, are both genuinely charming and are pretty strong characters independent of each other, which cannot be said for A Lot of romance protags. despite the absolute insanity of how they met (yes, Khai's mother went to Vietnam and offered, uneducated a poor single mother a tourist visa in exchange for trying to seduce her autistic son. yes, that's shady. don't think about it too hard) and Esme waiting until WAY too late in the game to reveal the existence of HER LIVING HUMAN CHILD, I liked this book a lot. it's silly and heartfelt and I had fun; what else do you need? 5/5 eggplant emojis.

Giovanni's Room (James Baldwin, 1956) - there's probably nothing I can say about Giovanni's Room that I could say that someone smarter and gayer hasn't already said, but god. it really is breathtaking. I so often see this book talked about as a gay tragedy, and honestly that feels like almost too glib of a description. it's a really meticulous dissection of white male masculinity and the claustrophobic constraints there of, and our narrator's claustrophobic fear of divesting himself from the power that he's entitled to by virtue of being a white American man perceived as a heterosexual. this man would rather live in repressed misery for his entire life than risk being like those effeminate faggots at the gay club, but spoiler alert! being miserable doesn't make you better than your fellow fags; it just means you're miserable AND a fag. sharp and painful and so so so smart. also I'm going to summon @zaricats because I was supposed to tell you what I thought about this book. oops!

Lone Women (Victor LaValle, 2023) - okay so listen. did I just say Black Water Sister wasn't really for me because of the simplistic prose? yes. did I really enjoy the very sparse, straightforward style of Lone Women? also yes. leave me alone, I contain contradictions. anyway, Lone Women is a ripping piece of historical fiction spliced with supernatural secrets, based on LaValle's research into 19th century Black women homesteaders who made their lives in Montana. LaValle opens on a scene of irresistible intrigue - Adelaide Henry, lone woman, sets out for Montana with a mysteriously heavy trunk after burning down her family's California farm with her parents' mutilated corpses inside. and boy, does it escalate from there! it's a story about isolation and community and the people who are failed by so-called close knit small towns, and the ways in which vulnerable people band together to protect one another. it also makes the compelling point that maybe, just maybe, the real monsters were your local transphobe and her husband's lynch mob all along.

Black Disability Politics (Sami Schalk, 2022) - what a cool book! Schalk's argument begins with the idea that Black disability politics are distinct from predominantly white mainstream disability politics, and are therefore often overlooked in conversation, activism, and academia. Schalk analyzes the historical work of the Black Panthers and the National Black Women's Health Project to showcase what she describes as Black disability politics in action. in Schalk's conception, Black disability politics take a much more holistic approach to disability, conceptualizing as just one form (and, frequently, as a result of) of oppression tangled up with a myriad of others that cannot be meaningfully addressed when they're treated as separate issues. the book concludes in interviews with contemporary Black disability activists and organizers that shed light on ways in which the wider movement is often unwelcoming to folks of color, and an exhortation from Schalk for readers to continue the conversation well beyond the confines of the book. in a killer show of praxis, the entire book has been made available to read in PDF form, and I strongly recommend giving it a look!

The River of Silver (S.A. Chakraborty, 2022) - mentally I am kicking myself a little for waiting so long to read this continuation of my beloved Daevabad trilogy, because it did take me a minute to get back into the swing and mythology of the world and that did make me feel unpleasantly like I wasn't appreciating these character-focused short stories as much as I could be. but even having said that - man! fuck I love the world of Daevabad, and I adore these characters so much. getting to see them again, even briefly, was a delight, and I am once again congratulating Nahri and Ali on being the invention of heterosexual romance. (also, on a related note, but I ADORE the way Chakraborty writes her characters having crushes. they crush SO hard and it's very sweet. these books are such big drama all the way down.)

Men We Reaped (Jesmyn Ward, 2013) - an absolute powerhouse of a memoir, and devastating the whole way down. in Men We Reaped Ward attempts to make sense of a series of tragedies that befell her community when five young Black men - beginning with Ward's younger brother - died between 2000 and 2004. the word 'unflinching' is hopelessly played out, but it's difficult to figure out how to describe the head-on way Ward explores each young man's life and ultimate end and her own upbringing. the men in Ward's history - her brother, the friends she lost, her father and other male relatives - are never idealized; their demons, miseries, infidelities, addictions, and violence are placed on full display. but Ward is also insistent on displaying these men with dignity, compassion, empathy; showing them at their best and, most importantly, as men who were loved and deserved better than the violence that poverty and racism wrought on them. it's a furious memoir, one that will leave you mourning too.

Nimona (ND Stevenson, 2015) - did I only read this so I can make more informed complaints if/when I end up watching the netflix movie with my wife? YES. but listen, it wasn't JUST petty hater behavior. Nimona is just really good, and I think I got a lot more out of it this time around that I did when I first read it years ago. this comic is wild and unfettered and so spectacularly weird; I wish more things felt the way Nimona does. I also with more things starred small girls begging to kill cops and stage a violent overthrow of the government, that rules hard. also man I love Ballister, he's SUCH a good protagonist. he's curmudgeonly, he's deeply principled, he's held a grudge for years, he's paternal, he's even gay. what a guy!

#reading updates

[moxfirefly]

Nobody necessarily asked for these but it’s been a meh few days and I figured I’d write some shit to keep busy (a little stuck on request but a bih is managing)

So I give you, some random headcanons for the guys

Michelangelo

I like to think that this orange lad while the fun type of bf that has you in stitches nearly every minute, has his serious moments

Similar to Don he’s painfully aware that he isn’t normal and while he can be somewhat vain that boy has got some self conscious thoughts running through him all day. Especially with his s/o

That gives way to some depressive episodes 🥺 (hug him pls)

He’s the second best cook of the four (Raph being 1st place) but he’s the best baker though.

Loves being competitive in games with Raph but enjoys playing co-op more with Donnie

The only time you can catch him really concentrating is when he draws. Boy really gets lost in it. Goes without mentioning, yes he draws his s/o and has gifted them some pretty dope ass pieces

Heaviest sleeper, a bomb can go off. You’ve often almost violently shake him which leads to Grumpy Groggy Mikey™️ and he complains cause on the random days he manages to be up before you boy wakes you up super soft and sweetly

Besides Donnie he’s got seniority when it comes to picking the playlist they use for doing chores.

As I’ve stated and will die on that hill: Touch is his love language. He still likes to snuggle up to his bros or give them hugs. He’s basically attached to the hip with his s/o.

Fancies himself a bit of a style icon

He remembers perfectly the firsts: first kiss, first time, first fight, first makeup, first everything

Him and Raph are the dynamic duo but Mikey loves being coddled by Leo because big brother and littlest brother™️

But he feels most comfortable talking about unusual or somewhat embarrasing things with Donnie cause he always hits him with the “yes it’s perfectly normal because *long winded biology esplanation*”

Doesn’t like to cry in front of his brother but breaks apart with Splinter

He Loves™️ the sound of his name when it comes out of his s/o’s mouth. In every sense of the word, angry, happy, surprised, lustful etc

Donatello

Being a genius has its perks but man can it have its downsides.

He’s just ridiculously aware and that leads to many thoughts and those thoughts can turn very negative

He gets depressed pretty easily but he’s got that Keep on Keep Going attitude towards it. His s/o can catch on pretty quickly and there’s a struggle to reach him when his head is too clouded.

He is the Fix It type in all sense of the words. So he’s the bf that will listen to your problems and he’ll try and find a way around it to help you or at least give out a better point of view.

Which means he’s a great listener, like seriously he loves talking and he rambles but he loves when you do too

Loves to be caressed honestly. If his s/o runs a hand down his arms or thigh, if they caress his cheek or run a thumb across his lips.

He reads all manner of things tbh, from repair manuals to romance novels

Goes without saying, gamer boi. He loves doing mods, always wants to play on expert mode, smart sarcastic burns when he’s playing online and somebody is being an insensitive prick

He’s actually a really good sexter. He’s nervous physically cause self image issues but with reassurance etc he gets lowkey cocky

No necessarily the best cook but he’s not bad either. He does like to make you breakfast in bed.

Serotonin hiiiiigh when they bring him coffee

He loves late night drives, usually takes a Raph with him but once he gets his s/o it’s the two of you driving around New York. One some ocassions Raph tags along too

While they get along pretty good, him and Leo can butt heads a lot. It’s not a dick measuring contest like Leo and Raph. They just argue and Donnie gets a smart mouth and Leo well he can be a dick.

Regardless they make up pretty fast.

Leonardo

He’s got a smidge of OCD. He’s very particular of keeping things in a particular order that he knows and nobody really understands but it makes him happy.

Expert folder of clothing so everyone rejoices when it’s his turn to do laundry cause that mofo does some orgami like shit to everyone’s boxers

He reminds everyone to eat fruit and veggies, can’t be pizza every night

Yes he can be a hardass but he’s honestly an absolute softie with those he loves. He’s very attentive with everyone’s needs, especially Splinter

Rooftop star gazing, he likes to decompress and sometimes that means going somewhere by himself. When coupled up he loves doing this with his s/o and it’s a nice way to get some time to themselves

Listen Leo is boyfriend material, he’s husband material. It’s stupid how perfect he is when it comes to being someone’s partner. He remembers the little things like really dumb things that always guts his s/o.

He’s thought about if anything were to happen to him he’d want Raph to step up. Even if they argue and bicker and fight he knows Raph would set the world on fire if it meant protecting his loved ones.

Is learning Japanese and he so wants to see it someday. Has gotten pretty good at speaking it but reading it is still a little hard.

Has snuck into a flower shop after hours to get you a bouquet, it’s cool he leaves the money on the counter

When Casey and April had their first Big Fight™️ and she showed up and started bawling, everyone thought Raph was gonna end Casey but in reality it was Leo, that boy was seething if Donnie hadn’t played mediator it was gonna be ugly

Leo hates to see somebody he loves cry cause somebody was just being an ass

He loves game night and movie night

While he takes his leader duties seriously this boy will sleep away a day away. He’s tired af get him a blanket pls.

Raphael

Grumpy boi lives to exercise and lift weights but he does have other things he enjoys. He loves sneaking out an making his away around the city from rooftop to rooftop

As stated, best cook in the fam. This man takes pride in that. So as his s/o trust me you’re gonna be well fed

Although he will never admit he can’t fall a sleep without you like once y’all start dating and sleeping over he needs you there.

Mikey gets on his last nerve but Christ if anyone messes with him. Raph is ripping their necks. That’s his boy, he’ll always protect him, which is why whenever Leo starts going on Dad Mode he always sides with his little bro.

Sure he’s got his anger issues but honestly he’s probably one of the most sentimental of his brothers. So yeah cry angry but he’s just a ball of emotions and he doesn’t know how to manage them sometimes but he’s trying

He’s protective of Mikey but lord is he protective of April. Like honestly he gave Casey the big brother ‘if you break her heart I’m breaking ya neck’ speech and he fucking means it

Also, he’s really close with April. Those two are always talking and goofing about. He sees her as that little sister (or more so big sister) and he likes having a sister.

He’s super close with Donnie, they’ve often felt like outcast in their own ways. Raph likes helping out, he’s pretty handy.

#tmnt bayverse #tmnt leonardo #tmnt raphael #tmnt donatello #tmnt michelangelo #tmnt leo #tmnt Donnie #tmnt Mikey #tmnt Raph #Leonardo #Raphael #Michelangelo #Donatello #headcanons #I was bored

[seokiloquy]

Lost In- What Word? Pt 1 - Akaashi Keiji

AU: Single Parent

Requested

Word Count: 4.5k+

Disclaimer: Fem! Reader, Time skip spoilers, Udai being a meta Furudate insert, just fluff

Pt 1 | Pt 2 | Pt 3

Akaashi wasn’t sure if Udai was naturally forgetful, or just held so much anticipation in his smaller form that he glossed over details and didn't realize it. Udai was an excellent author despite not having reached the major public yet. His first published work was short and eerie which most of the shonen reading population didn’t greedily rip off the shelves. Although, those that did read it gave him overwhelming support, maybe the rest of the world wasn’t ready for that kind of psychological horror just yet.

When Akaashi originally applied for a position at the publishing company he intended to work in the literature department, editing lengthy novels and picking out grammatical errors, not reading conversations via text bubbles and looking for continuity errors between images. He never did pick out the exact moment he went from editor to fact-checker and archivist. Akaashi also never knew how many different ways there were to translate a single word until he met you. And once he did, he realized that his eyes would follow you across the office as you ran around and spoke to other editors, helping them furnish their translations so that they flowed properly.

“Tenma, isn’t he meant to be out of the rotation for this panel?” Akaashi couldn’t help but grimace when faced with the utter despair that had pulled on Udai’s typically eased expression. The panel itself was masterfully drawn, taking up two pages and showing off Udai’s immense talent in drawing expressions and anatomy.

“I spent 8 hours on that, only to find out that it needs to be scrapped. What has my life come to?”

The yellow office lights made both of the men’s hair give off a green tinge and made their faces look sickly. Udai frowned as he pushed his chair back and let his chin sit on the table of the small meeting room. His hair curled around his fingers as they gently tugged on the ends of the wavy black stands, straightening them only to let them go and have them bounce back into place.

Akaashi flipped through the printed out pages of the chapter, letting the loose papers lay flat on the table. He pointed to the next pages. “These are fine though. They’re in the right rotation here, so not all is lost at least.”

Udai sighed, as he threw his weight back into the chair, making it spin with his momentum. “That’s all well and good, but I was really proud of that panel. It was going to be the attention grabber.”

Akaashi pursed his lips gently, flipping through the pages once more before tucking them into the pale yellow folder and closing it. Udai’s new story was in its beginning stages, only having a sample chapter that would be published in the following week’s magazine, that is if they got it done in time. 

“It needs to be perfect. I can’t have this not work and starve for the rest of my life.”

Akaashi opened his mouth slightly, taking in a deep breath, ready to spout out his words of encouragement for his colleague when there was a knock on the door followed by the soft creaking of the hinges as it opened.

“Sorry to interrupt, but I just wanted to ask Udai about some of the uh… what’s the word? Dang, I’m supposed to know Japanese, it’s my job. The— I give up. Help?”

Udai chuckled and waved you over to take the seat opposite him, you shook your head and bowed slightly as your hand raised, saying you were alright, not needing the chair. Leaning down slightly you pointed at the ruff sketch copy in your hand where your current author’s handwriting seemed to over the edges of the text bubble slightly.

“I’m sorry to interrupt, but how in the hell am I supposed to translate ‘paisen’?”

The innocent question seemed to brighten Udai’s mood much more than Akaashi’s monotone words of support would have. The older man launched backwards, nearly flinging himself off the chair, in a fit of laughter. His hands gripped the shirt he wore above his stomach and chest as they tried to ease the laughing pains.

Akaashi chuckled at the sight before looking at your somewhat regretful expression, you were probably too used to your co-workers laughing at your in-fluency at Japanese. “You can probably substitute a familiar nickname or a joking reference of respect.”

You sighed and brushed your hand over the back of your neck, “I swear, Himari had the intent to torture me with this last chapter. Thank you, Akaashi.”

Finally calmed from his fit of giggles, Udai sat straight in his chair and sent you a gracious smile. “Well, at least when you join our team I won’t torture you as much.”

You gave Udai and Akaashi a teasing smirk as you reached for the door handle. “I’m not so sure about that,” you said. “Besides, you need to get the attention of the readers before I join your team. No point in translating a comic that doesn’t even get off the ground right?”

You sent them a wink and the door closed behind you with a quiet click.

“Was that a challenge?”

“I believe so,” Akaashi said, handing Udai a blank sheet of paper. “Looks like we have some work to do.”

The office was, as it was the day before, and the day before that, calm. Udai sat in a small isolated office on his own with a naturally coloured lamp hanging over his hunched figure. The rest of his team, including Akaashi and now you as well, sat outside his door in a row of cubicles that led up to a large window that took up the entirety of the wall. In the corner cubicle, pressed against the window and directly across from him, you sat, typing away on your computer as you translated the Japanese text into Wild Words fonted English. 

“Akaashi, is the end of chapter ready to translate?” Your head peeked over the frosted cubicle wall, a small smile pulling at the corner of your lips and the corner of your eyes pinching together. Akaashi’s gaze fluttered around.

“Ah, Ya the edits are done so you can finish translating it now.”

The smile you wore only seemed to grow, making Akaashi want to turn away and stare at the same time. The sun’s light contrasted with the dull rectangular lights in the office, making your skin glow. Your fingers tightened on the top of the glass and your shoulders rose to your ears, you narrowly missed knocking over an owl keychain that hung on his side of the wall.

“Perfect,” you said. “I’ll get them done now.”

The day continued like this, everyone working and occasionally calling out to each other through their cubed walls, possibly getting a twirling pen in the forehead followed by a meek apology (coming from you). Every time you spoke to someone you would rise out of your seat to make eye contact with them, refusing to continue speaking otherwise, and even though he wasn’t the person you always spoke to, each time your head began to poke out of your squared corner Akaashi couldn’t help but turn his attention your way, watching as the sun's light danced around you. It didn’t come to a surprise when, like every instance before, Akaashi looked up when you shot up from your seat. Only this time there was a frantic look plastered unevenly on your face, one that the warm light didn’t compliment.

“Please tell me my clock is wrong and that it’s not 4 pm.”

Chiyo leaned back in her chair, setting down her Cintiq’s pen and flipped the watch on her wrist so that the face faced her. “Yup, it’s actually 4:15.”

Akaashi was surprised to hear a not so work friendly English curse leave your lips as you rushed to save files on your computer while simultaneously packing your purse. You continued to swear as you ran out of your cubicle and toward the elevators with a quick “goodbye” being thrown over your shoulder. The office was quiet.

“Does that happen often?” Ena asked as he pulled off his glasses.

The group of artists and their editor sat in stunned silence for a few moments, minds racing over where the young translator had scurried off to. In their collaborative confusion, the team slowly went back to their respective jobs.

Himari came around the corner of the office, coffee in hand, as she chatted with her editor, who was nursing his own mug. The writer looked up for her conversation to see Udai’s team and gave them a polite nod. They were going to meekly return to their work when Himari paused her steps and looked at the empty plush chair that sat rotated and untucked in your cubicle.

“Oh, did (Y/N) leave?” to Akaashi’s surprise, Himari was not.

“Does she do that often?” he asked, setting down his pen on the counter of his desk.

Himari nodded, smiling, “Oh ya, sometimes she gets lucky and her friend can handle it but a lot of the time she has to run out of here by 3.” Akaashi’s brow furrowed slightly as Himari took a sip of her coffee before continuing waving her hand by her head, “Don’t worry too much about it though, she always comes in early to get her work done.”

Before they could question further, Himari was off with her editor sending them a knowing smile.

When the end of the workday rolled around, only 45 minutes after your quick departure, Akaashi found his eyes trailing back to his phone that sat at the corner of his desk on top of a stack of papers. Keeping watch on his phone, he swung his bag over his shoulder and shut off his computer. The device remained silent as the team began to pile out of their seats, toward the elevators and in a fit of contemplation, he reached for the phone.

Your response was quick and vague; Family thing, happens often. I’ll tell you later. See you tomorrow!

After the sample comic was released, Udai was thrown when he received an immense amount of interest for his characters and story, and he was even more excited when he received word from the magazine’s publishers that they wanted him to continue with the path he was on. The months building up to this moment were filled with constant plot revisions, reference excursions, and interviews until they came to a conclusive framework of the story, and continued introductions as new members were added to their original duo to make the workload less hefty. 

Today though was the day that the story’s first chapter would finally be released to the public. 

Akaashi tracked into the office, heading to the lounge to grab a coffee before coming up to his cubicle against the window and setting his bag down, immediately heading to the lounge. 8:40 in the morning, 20 minutes before the expected time of arrival, Akaashi, back at his desk, was just about to take a sip of coffee when a small snore overlapped the sound of the air conditioners, creating a dishonest harmony. 

On the other side of the frosted glass wall of the cubicle was you, head resting on the black mouse pad that had a small plush cushion for your wrist. Akaashi quickly rounded the desks, coming to our side to gently rouse you from your slumber before your co-workers arrived. He was to wake you up gently with a hand on your shoulder, that was the plan. The plan changed when he noticed the small picture frame on your desk, surrounded by various action figures and Funko pops.

With one hand on your shoulder and the other holding the fame, he studied the photo with a kind gaze. He was so enthralled with the image that he forgot that below his other hand, was you.

“He’s cute ain’t he?” you asked, startling the editor back to his current reality as you stretched, arching your back like a cat. Akaashi’s attention was brought back to the current situation as you reached out for another frame in the opposite corner of your desk. “His name is Naoko. Here, this photo is newer.”

The young boy in the new photo looked like you a lot, more so than the previous one where he was just an infant that carried more resemblance to a potato than a human. Akaashi, without taking his eyes off the pictures, pulled the chair out from under Ena’s desk and sat next to you. He didn’t say anything, deciding just to admire the photos he held and letting you decide whether or not he should have the pleasure of hearing a story.

You sighed and yawned, leaning over the armrest of your chair so you would see them too. “He’s six, really quiet. I moved here when I found out. Hardly even out of university, and I was already pregnant with some strangers kid,” you laughed, making Akaashi stare at your features for a moment, wanting to point out which ones could be found on the boy.

“Is he the reason you moved to Japan?” Akaashi was a little taken aback by your willingness to talk, but in hindsight, you didn’t seem like the person to keep secrets, often rattling with your co-workers about your interests. Thinking back, maybe he should have expected something like this, Himari seemed to have known after working with you for several years, happily dancing around the topic of your personal life with your new coworkers when your sudden departure was questioned.

You shrugged, “not entirely, but he sure was a good excuse. I had plans to move to Japan for years before I even got into university. When I found out, I was sort of… uh. English…. Fuck, I need a job. So I applied to be an intern here, moved in with a friend I met online and prepared to have a baby.” Your arms flew about as you talked.

“You act as though it was easy,” Akaashi laughed, placing the frames back onto the table.

You let out a happy chuckle and spun your chair to face Akaashi head-on, eyes not leaving his, “I wouldn’t say it was easy, per se, but I’m happy with how things turned out.” you yawned a bit, “I should also apologize for running out of the office early sometimes, I have to pick Naoko up from school so —”

“You don’t have to apologize for that.” The gentle smile he wore was contagious.

It was 8:50 when the rest of the team came in. Immediately catching sight of Ena, Akaashi pulled away from your side, rolling the chair back to its respective location. He heard a breathy laugh escape you as he scurried around the desks to return to his designated spot across from you, cardigan flailing about.

The rest of your team piled into their seats sending the two of you waves and morning greetings. Ena nearly dropped his ‘don’t talk to me till I’ve had my coffee’ mug as he tripped over his rubber slides just before reaching his desk next to yours.

Sending your friends a smile you quickly slid back into your cubicle to re-adjust the frames on your desk with a yawn. Akaashi gave you a nod when you looked up to his stiff, still standing, form. You made his heart feel much weaker than he’d like to admit and without saying another word, he picked up the forgotten mug filled with brown liquid and handed it over the glass, into your hands.

Naoko was much more reserved than Akaashi expected, definitely a contrast to your more hyper personality. He spent most of the day sitting in the corner behind your cubicle where a table was set up next to a row of cabinets. What the boy was doing, Akaashi wasn’t entirely sure, but there was a small tickle at that back of his brain that made him want to find out.

When you had come in that morning, the group was surprised to see the small boy trailing behind you, holding onto your hand tightly with the both of his. “PD day,” you said. Udai spent the first few minutes of the day gushing over the boy’s cheeks instead of working, only to end up being backtracked and having to cram into his lunch break. Akaashi would be lying if he said he wasn’t thankful for that though.

“What do you have there?” he asked, taking a seat next to the boy and setting down his lunch next to the younger’s bento box.

Naoko curled in on himself, bringing the phone (that was most definitely yours) to his chest. The boy’s knees had pulled up to his shoulders as his feet pushed on the edge of the chair. Akaashi sent the young boy a kind smile and waited. From the corner of his eye, he could see your chair turn around as you took in the sight of your son and co-worker. He watched as you began making large swinging motions with your arms. Akaashi tried not to laugh.

Whatever had been playing on the phone hadn’t been paused in the short time given to do so, making the familiar sound ring quietly around the two of them. 

Akaashi looked back your way for a moment, only to see you tilt your head up in a supporting nudge and turn back around.

“Are you watching a volleyball game?” he asked, rousing a more positive reaction from the boy.

Naoko’s shoulders lowered and he slowly placed the phone down between them. As Akaashi had concluded, a volleyball game played on the small screen. He put forward another question.

“Do you like to play?”

The six-year-old shrugged but nodded before scooting his chair in closer and reaching for his food. Akaashi mirrored him, slipping off his collared cardigan and pulling his lunch closer, still watching the game.

“I used to play volleyball.” This caught the boy’s attention, who turned his head to look at Akaashi, brows raised and lips pursed. “I was a setter.”

Naoko swallowed his food and for the first time, Akaashi got to hear him speak.

“I like playing setter too.”

His voice was rather meek and had a sort of authority to it, but the biggest thing he noticed made him stifle a laugh.

“Hey, (Y/N),” he called gently, making you spin your chair around in question. “Why is Naoko better at Japanese then you?”

“Hey! That’s mean!”

Naoko began to wiggle in his seat, desperately trying not to laugh at his mother’s, your, irritation. You shot a look at your son and gasped.

“Don’t you start laughing at me. I speak English better than you do.”

“You don’t need to speak English in Japan, mom.”

Kaashi continued to choke on his laugher as you pushed the palm of your hand into your forehead. “I’m being teased by my own son,” you cried quietly, turning your chair back around to face the unedited pages.

Naoko giggled and looked back Akaashi’s way. “Can you teach me?”

Akaashi didn’t see you still in your chair, listening.

“Of course I can.”

“Udai, seriously? You promised that you weren’t going to use weird industry term slang stuff on me.”

With a wide-eyed look and hair messily tied back, the man in question rotated his chair around childishly. “I never promised. I just said I'd go easier on you.” It was infuriating really. 

With a pitiful whine, you shook the rough script in your hand making an angry fluttering sound. “You’re so mean Tenma. You know that I have trouble with slang.”

Udai only laughed and waved you off, “It’s a good way to learn is it not?”

You rolled your eyes but relented, giving a wave and closing the door. Once at your seat Akaashi poked his head out, eyes visible over the top of his square-framed glasses.

“He did it again?”

“Ya,” you huffed. “I can’t blame him though. It’s just frustrating that I can’t remember what a lot of the words mean. I should buy a dictionary.” Akaashi watched as you turned your monitor on. “Oh, um, Naoko was asking about you the other day.”

“Really?”

Your hands came together behind your neck, pulling your head down bashfully. “Ya, he’s been wanting to show you how he’s doing and maybe get the chance to learn a bit from you.”

Akaashi gave you a kind smile, so small that it didn’t even crease his cheeks, and nodded. “Sounds like a plan.”

Your cheeks warmed as you beamed up at him before turning your head down towards your computer screen. Akaashi took a second to appreciate how the cool light from the overcast sky made you look. It was silent in the office for a moment. Just a moment.

“Udai! Another one?!”

In theory, so long as you have space above your head, you can play volleyball anywhere. Your apartment wasn’t ‘anywhere’.

The three-bedroom living space was built as housing and not an Olympic arena, and after breaking one too many of your glasses playing around, it was made clear to you, Naoko, and your sport junky roommate, that volleyball shouldn’t be allowed in the house.

“You guys can go play volleyball with Akaashi at the park, no?” Yukie asked, grabbing an onigiri of the large plate on your kitchen counter and stuffing it in her face. You made a large dinner that day, only to have your friend eat most of it, instead of leaving leftovers for Naoko’s lunch. Not that he complained about it, you sure did though.

Taking Yukie’s words to heart, when the weekend rolled around and Naoko was becoming more anxious, you invited Akaashi to your neighbourhood park to play volleyball.

“Open your elbows a bit more, make a triangle with your hand, and when the ball comes just cushion it with your fingertips before sending it out, okay?”

Naoko nodded, staring at his hands that were being moved around by the older player. Akaashi’s form was kneeled by the boy’s side, his head nearly resting on the younger's shoulder as he tried to make sure he was in the right position.

“Alright,” he said, grabbing the smaller than average volleyball off of the grass. “I’m gonna toss this to you, do you think you can get it to hit my hand right up here?”

Naoko nodded again, eagerly waiting for the blue and yellow ball to come flying his way. You watched silently from the park bench as Naoko tried (and often failed) to get the ball to touch Akaashi’s hand accurately. 

“Almost there, you got this Naoko!” Akaashi encouraged.

Earnestly waiting to see the next move, you sat forward in your seat, watching as that ball made a tall arch towards Naoko’s waiting palms. As the ball made contact with his fingertips, he bent his elbows and wrists before shooting them out into a straight line, sending into the palm of Akaashi’s hand before dropping back onto the grassy field.

Your son, as most six-year-olds do when accomplishing something, shrieked. He shrieked very loudly before sprinting directly into Akaashi’s stomach to give him a (breath-stealing) hug. Akaashi coughed as he tried to get air back into his depleted lungs. From the side you giggled, watching as Naoko’s smile grew, head buried into Akaashi’s stomach.

It became standard, going out to the park during your off days. And this day, like the weekends that have come before, the routine of going to the park, ball in hand, continued. But after spending an hour or so watching the familiar movement of the yellow and blue ball fly through the air, Naoko interrupted the serene setting with a loud request.

“Mama! Mom! Can we go get onigiri?”

Looking up from resting your neck on the back of the bench to turn your gaze onto the energetic boy that was hopping around on the grass. “I’m okay with that, but you should probably ask Akaashi along. We don't want to leave him at the park do we?” you teased, picking up your bag and walking toward the two.

Naoko spun again to look at Akaashi, whose hands were now tucked into his jeans pockets. “Please!” he wailed. “Come with us! Please, please, please, please, please!”

Akaashi let out a hearty laugh. “Calm down, I’ll join you.” without saying another word, Akaashi offered his hand out, letting Naoko clutch it eagerly.

“Udai are you sure it’s okay to bring Naoko along? This is meant to be a work trip and I’d hate for him to dis… dic… get in the way,” you gave up at the end, sighing over your tripping words.

Udai gave Naoko, who had been clinging to Akaashi’s arm since all of you had met outside the city gymnasium, a pat on the head. “It’s alright. Besides, he’ll probably be a great resource.” 

You nodded and watched as Naoko rattled to Akaashi about his school team and new things they had been practicing. You pouted. Upon their arrival, Ena, Chiyo and the others immediately began teasing you for effectively losing your son’s favour, which didn’t make your whining any less audible. On top of that, the group of artists found your sullen look to be a perfect reference, taking their cameras out.

“Keiji,” you cried, following behind the rest of the group as they waltzed through the gym entrance along with the crowd. “You’ve stolen my son.”

Akaashi paused for a moment, taking in a calm breath before looking over his shoulder. “He’s your son, I can’t steal that from you.”

Naoko threw a large smile over his shoulder, making your dragging steps falter.

When did it change? The expression on his face. When did it become so happy? Did he not smile before?

You picked up your pace, brows furrowed as you watched your son chatter happily.

When did he start speaking so much? Since when did he have so much to say? Was it something new in his diet? Or maybe the new friends on his volleyball team?

You found your gaze shifting to the hand that held his. Without thinking about it too hard, you quickened your steps to come up to Naoko’s other side. Your heart pounded as you held your closest hand out for him to grab hold of. When he finally did, immediately looking forward to dragging the two adults with him, the smile you gave Akaashi was the largest he’s ever seen coming from you. 

You looked back at all of your interconnecting hands fondly.

When did he become another person’s son?

I tried going a bit of a different direction with this one in comparison to most Single Parent aus. I’ll admit it could have more meat to it, but oh well, things to improve on. 

Question:

Do you prefer weekly one-shots that are shorter in length (like we’re doing) or longer ones with bigger plots and inconsistent updates (Sort of like “Catch Me If You Can” and “Ready Aim FIre” but longer)? 

- Bacon

Posted: 31/07/2020

#haikyuu x reader #akaashi keiji #akaashi x reader #Haikyuu #x reader #oneshot #oneshots #haikyuu oneshots #haikyuu reader insert #reader insert #aus #haikyuu aus #fluff #haikyu #anime x reader #anime #manga x reader #manga

[godsofhumanity]

GODHUNTER by AMY SUMIDA | REVIEW

okiee this was recommended to me by @inkleaves ^-^ uhmm so i have a LOT to say about this book. spoilers under cut.

OVERVIEW: “Godhunter” is the epithet given to a young woman named Vervain who uses witchcraft and magic to go around committing deicide in order to save humanity from gods who drain their energy to gain immortality and other godly attributes. However, when Vervain is recruited by the Norse god Thor, she finds herself in an alliance with the people she originally considered her enemies, as they work together to save the world from the maliciousness of the Aztec god, Huitzilopochtli.

RATING: 2/10. i’m giving it a low rating because it doesn’t really have too much to do with mythology, but i did like its general portrayal of most deities even though this book was insanely cringey and dumb.. now, even though under the cut, i’ve kinda bashed the book quite a bit, i still have to admit that i’d be lying if i said i didn’t have fun reading it. i stayed up to 1 AM trying to finish it because i had to find out what the protag’s next stupid decision would be,, all in all, if you like trash/cringe fiction- this is for you.

WARNING: even though this book is a YA novel, I’d say there’s a definite emphasis on the adult part of “young adult”... Certain scenes and themes are inappropriate for minors.

AVAILABLE ON: pdf link here ^-^ ((i think it downloads immediately if you click))

THINGS I LIKED:

the book is cringe.

great diversity in terms of the god cast. i learned about some new deities that i was previously unfamiliar with, so that was cool

Brahma (Hindu deity) wears a Gucci belt as part of his attire ^-^

whatever Estsanatlehi and Tsohanoai (Native American deities) had going on.... they were really cute and wholesome

THOR-HORUS BROTP AGENDA!!!!!!!! everyone who follows me already knows how keen i am about this idea of all the war deities hanging out together (fite club), and this novel served up exactly that. disappointing that Huitzilopochtli wasn’t a part of it, but i am settling for Thor and Horus’ several centuries old friendship.

Horus’ falcon tattoo detail.. i LOVE the idea of the gods having their sacred animals tattooed,, it’s so awesome!!!

Pan... i liked the way he still had his little horns, and he was kinda chaotic and fun.

in general, the descriptions of the gods were so pleasant and so cool.. i really liked the way that pretty much all the gods were beautiful,, this is very much in line with my own idea of how the gods look, and i think it makes sense, because they’re meant to be charismatic, compelling beings- beings that you worship, beings that you praise- why would they be anything but beautiful? and even if they were considered ugly by other gods, that’s only in comparison to other deities.. from a human perspective,, i just can’t see how any mortal could consider a god to be anything less than perfection,, idk

in particular- i really enjoyed the descriptions of Huitzilopochtli in his debut. i know he’s a piece of shit in the novel, but i LOVED the way he was described with his war-frenzy being triggered by blood, and the way, as god of the sun, his body almost glows, and heats up as though you’re looking into the sun itself, and the only way he can cool it down is by bathing in blood... WOWOWOWOW it’s just such a neat and fantastic visual description. his physical appearance really paid tribute to Huitzilopochtli’s original domain and attributes.

i also liked the linking between Huitzilopochtli being the Father of Vampires.. links between Aztec culture and vampirism is a trope that i didn’t originally suspect, but have become exposed to quite a bit as of late,, and i think that it’s quite a clever little plot. i liked that Huitzilopochtli also debunks superstitions about the sun, garlic, crosses, holy water etc.

Huitzilopochtli as the villain. the man makes a BRILLIANT villain- his motives are very clear and also, i thought, justified, albeit unoriginal. his presence is quite terrifying, and the reader does worry for Vervain’s safety whenever she’s with him- which is good! this means that he fills out his role as a villain well. tbh,, i did love Huitzilopochtli from the moment of his debut, but he got knocked out of my books during a certain temple scene and i have some thoughts about that in the next section.

when Vervain wakes up after the temple dream with Huitzilo, and she relaxes because it was just a dream, but then she looks into the mirror and sees bite marks on her neck!!! CHILLS! now THAT was good writing- it was unexpected, and served well to navigate into the next part of the plot.

Odin and Huitzilopochtli holding a ted talk on “how to create panic and discord among the humans”, and the gods having to bring certain meals depending on what the first letter of their names were.

Vervain’s pop-culture references, and her weaponry- especially the gloves that have blades in them that get released when she swings her hand downwards. very cool, i want them.

casual appearances from Vladimir Putin (yes, i said Vladimir Putin)... i couldn’t stop laughing when i read that Huitzilo was trying to kill Putin’s daughter to instigate a war...... asdhshajdhasdjfhjdhf insane

also i know Vervain was trying to mock Huitzilo when she nicknamed him “Blue”,, but like.. that’s a really cute name and it wasn’t even insulting.. yeah, that one backfired on you Vervain... if anything, that just made it seem like she actually had affections for him and i feel like probably in part is the reason why he felt encouraged to pursue her.

THINGS I DIDN’T LIKE/THINGS THAT DIDN’T MAKE SENSE AND/OR CONFUSED ME:

the book is cringe.

it reads like a 15 year old’s fantasy AU where she’s a humble young woman, unextraordinary- yet somehow, she is the muse of every man’s desire. handsome, ripped gods who never wear clothes are laying themselves down at her feet,, and she is just overwhelmed by the choices before her; and all the while, she has to balance a complicated love life with her duty to save the world (since she’s the only one who can).

Vervain as a protagonist. idk how old she’s meant to be, but since the book is in first-person, and the reader is exposed to her innermost thoughts,, i’ve gotta say- she’s incredibly immature. as a protagonist, i just feel like she’s rude, pretentious, snobby.. she has no idea what “respect” even means. in every scene, she’s either fighting someone, or lusting after them (when Teharon told her off for having lascivious thoughts about him, and she simply responded with “well stop being so sexy then” i wanted to die.... WHAT is wrong with her)

i hate the way she looks down on the gods- even if you didn’t worship them, or even believed in their existence, surely you wouldn’t have the gall to lecture Hades and Persephone on how to be a good couple (especially when your advice is shit). surely you wouldn’t have the gall to say to Thor what Vervain says to him on pg 227, 4th line from the bottom, that i will not repeat here. Vervain is just too self-absorbed. i don’t hate her, but i definitely think her character is a bit,,, iffy.

relating to Vervain as the protagonist- everything just seems to happen to her.. and i know that she’s the protag, and things are meant to happen to her, but it all happens to her one after the other in succession, no breaks. it’s so easy for her... oh? Huitzilopochtli is going to kill Putin’s daughter? no worries, Vervain can read Huitzilopochtli’s thoughts! oh? the gods have never been able to transform more than half their body into their animal form? no worries, Vervain is so powerful she can force a god to change against their will! oh? Vervain is being attacked by blood-thirsty wolves? no worries, she saved the life of one werewolf and now he’s indebted to her and will literally kill himself in order to protect her! everything is easy, and nothing is a problem.

the way every male deity ever sees Vervain once and immediately wants to take her to bed. why was that a necessary aspect of her character? and also, why are the gods portrayed as such lustful beings?? it really wasn’t necessary.

Horus throwing a fit about how December 25 is his birthday and that it was stolen from him by Jesus... to quote:

“No big deal?” Horus puffed up. “I was called the Lamb of God. I had twelve apostles, and my myths spoke of my crucifixion and consequent resurrection in three days. His stories were my stories first!”

it’s fine that Horus is angry about his birthday which was i think, historically celebrated around this date- but the rest of it isn’t even true???? Horus didn’t have 12 apostles, i’m pretty sure he was also not called “Lamb of God”, and he wasn’t crucified!!! aghhhh even Thor says “It’s been so long that even you don’t remember things accurately.”

anyways.. my beef with this is the way it’s phrased so as to imply that “oh christianity just stole everything from the pagans” when this is so incredibly false and sounds like something an ill-informed person would say. you can read more about christianity, paganism and christmas here

kinda related to the previous point- the jokes about Jesus’ skin colour. i quote:

“... when Christ first became a god, he looked Jewish because those were the people he chose to align himself with. However, the Jews didn’t want him, and when Christianity spread, the white people wanted Jesus to look more like them. With the change in belief, Christ’s appearance changed. ... We used to tease him about how he looked whiter every time we saw him... Kind of like Michael Jackson...”

what the FUCK??????? seems like Sumida doesn’t understand that various ethnic groups illustrate Jesus as appearing as the local people do. Yes, obviously in a Western country, Jesus is going to look European, he’s going to look white. If you go to Japan, you will see Jesus and the rest of the gang looking pretty fucking Japanese. the point of this is NOT to erase Jesus’ Jewish ethnicity, and it is certainly not because of something like “the Jews didn’t want him”- it is because it is a way for followers to better relate to the Divine. including Christ in this story isn’t the problem- i’ve seen others do it very well. the problem is how uneducated her writing comes across.

all the gods have human jobs so that they can earn money and stuff,, which is fine- Thor, for example, owns a line of boats, which makes sense. but Pan? his job is making p*rn. now even though it’s true that everyone associates Pan with sexuality and stuff,,, this isn’t his primary role, and making Pan out to be just a playboy who has his mind in the gutter 24/7 i think is a bit of a mockery. Pan is, first and foremost, a god of the Wild. why Sumida elected to make him a p*rn manufacturer and not a wildlife conservationist is beyond me... i’m not even pagan, and i thought this creative decision was distasteful and stupid, especially because his character is actually quite light-hearted and cool.

the temple scene with Huitzilopochtli and Vervain. as i said previously, i really really liked Huitzilo’s character. he made an excellent villain. but this part?? i understand why it was done, but i HATED that it had to happen... not just because it was horrible for Vervain, but Huitzilo seemed so powerful and godly right up to that point- after which he seemed pretty pathetic- going back after Vervain after she’s rejected him countless times. she is JUST a mortal!!! c’mon Huitzilo, give it up!!! you are degrading yourself at the expense of achieving one mortal’s “love”.. the fact that he had to hypnotise her to get what he wanted AND had to achieve it through her dreams (when’s she can’t protect herself) was sooooo pathetic and disgraceful.. IMO, he committed the worst sin any person could ever commit and i just... AGHHHHHHHHH SMH WHY?!

speaking of morons- Thor. Thor just comes across to me as extremely possessive, and over-protective,, and idk how Vervain was NOT creeped out by the fact that Thor had literally been stalking her for two years before she even met him. wtf? god or not- that’s creepy. actually, i think it’s creepier because he is a god. 

Sif. i am still waiting for good media representation of thunder god Thor and his beautiful golden-haired wife Sif- i want them to be HAPPY, and i want them to be in love the way they should be! 

Persephone. i like the idea of Persephone being sweet-tempered, and kind- but in this book, she’s such a wimp??????? she totally just lets Vervain be rude to her, a goddess who’s name means “Bringer of Destruction”. also- her relationship with Hades seems toxic.. i mean,, he like tracks her? she starts stuttering when she talks to him, and gets nervous when people so much as mention his name. not to mention the fact that Persephone says that when she does go back to him, all he demands from her is a certain horizontal dance so much so that she is “sore” (<- quoting from the book here) every time she returns??????? WHAT IS HAPPENING?????????? and no one even questions it. Vervain doesn’t even question it! instead she suggests that Persephone MOVES IN with Hades permanently???? and that Hades should just start verbally saying how much he loves Persephone instead of “showing” her how much he “loves” her.....??? there are SO many issues with this.. i can’t even- *screams*

the Aphrodite-is-madly-in-love-with-Huitzilopochtli side plot. it could have been really good, but then it ends so abruptly,,, i mean.. why’d Aphrodite get done so dirty like that? Also summary of Hephaestus’ first and final scenes:

Hephaestus, entering the room: Right, what’s all this then? Vervain: Your wife is cheating on you (again) Hephaestus: Aight, i’m out *leaves and never comes back for the rest of the book*

what the HECK was the ending with Trevor?? i hate Vervain so much i can’t... okay first of all- WHY did Trevor decide to have a wolf-marriage with Vervain?? he kept on going on about how she’s so beautiful, and kind, and caring... NO SHE ISN’T TREVOR!!! i’m so mad that he would pledge himself for all eternity to this girl who doesn’t even like him in that way!!! you played yourself son

also- Thor accepts the fact that Trevor is going to have to be close by to Vervain because the terms of the marriage state that Trevor will literally die without her touch, which is VERY GENEROUS of Thor... but Vervain?? ooooh i HATE her.. she has the audacity to look at Trevor with her lecherous eyes thinking about lustful things IN THOR’S OWN BED!!!!! and then she thinks to herself “oh whoops i shouldn’t be thinking that”- yeah you’re darn right you shouldn’t be thinking that!!!! whatttt is wrong with her............. 

also- where tf did Huitzilo go??? he just gave up on trying to instigate a war and vanished?? the plot was so unresolved?????? AGH!

#also- i forgot but- the Brad Pitt looking guy on the front cover.. i thought maybe that was meant to be Ull because he's blonde but i guess #it really was Thor in the end?? but Thor in the novel has red hair so what's up with that? how disappointing #person who reviewed this and said ''Vervain's one of the best female heroines today!''- can i have some of whatever you're smoking? #she's so horrible!!! aghhhhh #review #godhunter by amy sumida #long post

[carriagelamp]

September Book Roundup, back-to-school edition aka The Season Of Red apparently?

Here is a selection of the books I’ve read this month. Summer is over, so the little bit of brain power I had managed to scrape together is quickly disintegrating, so enjoying the hodge podge of stories.

Binti

This was probably my favourite book that I read this month. It’s a novella I first heard about hear on tumblr and went to find a copy in my library. I have since bought the collected trilogy so I can read book two and three at my leisure because it was honestly just that friggin cool. This is exactly my flavour of scifi and I tend to be very very picky about the scifi I consume. It’s about a girl named Binti, a member of the Himba people (a real group of indigenous people from Namibia). They are a people well known for their mathematical and technical prowess, but due to their strong connection to their homeland and the earth they choose not to travel through space like so many other humans do. However, when Binti secures a position at Oomza University, the greatest university in the galaxy, she chooses to go against her family’s wishes and traditions in order to set out into space to attend. Everything is ruined though when her spaceship is attacked by a hostile alien race and everyone is killed but Binti, who must rely on all her intellect and abilities if she wants any chance at survival.

A seriously cool book with great world building – it really successfully introduces readers not only to the fictional scifi world and races of the novel but also to the culture and traditions of the Himba people. It’s a quick read, and feels like a cross between Dead Space and Tamora Pierce. Would totally recommend a read.

Fake Blood

A Canadian graphic novel. It was a goofy cute read. It’s about an awkward group of friends in middle school, and one boy with a crush on one of the girls in his class. Knowing her love for vampire stories, AJ decides, like any self-respecting middle schooler, to try to pretend he’s a vampire. Naturally nothing goes right and some things go wrong in unexpected ways. It’s funny and cute. Nothing amazing but it was a cozy evening read.

The Last Book On The Left

I’ve been listening to this podcast a lot since my friend recommended it to me and finally decided to read their book. For those that don’t know, The Last Podcast On The Left is a immaculately researched comedy podcast that’s hosted by Ben Kissel, Marcus Parks, and Henry Zebrowski, and explores the darker realms of human nature. Ghosts, paranormal, aliens, cults, and of course serial killers. In this book they collected several of their biggest name serial killer series, did some renewed research, and put together a book that is both informative, irreverent, gross, and very funny, complete with some really amazing illustrations by Tom Neely. A very cool read (and listen, if you decide to check out the podcast instead), I really love how they tell these stories without idolizing or romanticizing the people they talk about. Their humour always makes sure you know exactly how much of a pathetic loser these people are. Fantastic true crime, from someone who has never really felt the need to read about true crime before.

Midnight Sun

I won’t harp on this one, everyone is already going to firmly have their opinions here. I grew up on Twilight, I was reading them as they came out, and I still love them. Were they dumb? Oh my god yes. Did they have problems? Sure, they came out in 2005 it was part and parcel. Were they also a really fun for a thirteen year old to read? Absolutely, I don’t regret it. Sometimes teenage girls should just to get like things without being mocked.

Anyway, I am off my soapbox now (can you tell this is still a raw spot for me?) I unironically loved this book! Getting to see Edward’s perspective was really cool, and since he can read minds it essentially let you get the perspective of everyone else around him too. The Cullens family is a great set of characters so it was really cool to see more of them, and I was very impressed by how Stephenie Meyers took a YA romance she wrote in 2005 and was able to make it feel updated and more appropriate for a 2020 audience even though she couldn’t actually change any of the events themselves. So fans of Twilight, don’t be ashamed, go read Midnight Sun and have the shameless fun you deserve. Is there anymore appropriate book for the bizarre ass year that was 2020 than a return to this goofy nonsense?

The Paperbag Princess

(and Up, Up, Down, and Robert Munsch in general)

I’m back in schools so I’m back to reading children’s book! And honestly, and of you that don’t occasionally sit down and read a kids book out loud don’t know what you’re missing. Anyway, Robert Munsch is a Canadian author, and one of my all-time favourite children’s authors. It surprised me to learn he isn’t as well known in the States apparently? I don’t know if that’s changed or not, but he is a Canadian staple for a good reason, his books have ridiculous premises, are specifically written to be fun to read out loud, and have beautiful, involved, and hilarious illustrations. The Paperbag Princess is one of my absolute favourites, and as a kid it was one of the first stories I had ever read where a princess is the one saving the prince… and then telling the prince to piss off when it turns out he’s a jerk. Up, Up, Down is another favourite I reread this month, because it’s just hilarious funny and makes a fantastic read aloud with kids. Some other Robert Munsch I reread this month include: Mmm, Cookies, More Pies, Ribbon Rescue, Just One Goal, and Andrew’s Loose Tooth. You just cannot go wrong, for kids or adults.

Pit Pony

Another Canadian staple while I was growing up. If you’re a young adult know who went through the Canadian elementary school system, you probably had your entire heart ripped out and stepped on by this chapter book. It’s a historical fiction that looks at the economic hardship, debt slavery, child labour, and animal abuse that was tied to coal mining in the Maritimes. Finding a copy was harder than I would have expected give how pervasive it was a decade or so back, but reading it again was a pure shot of nostalgia.

Seeking Refuge

A graphic novel written by a German-born Canadian about a Jewish girl who flees Nazi-occupied Austria by way of Kindertransport to become a child refuge in England. It follows her as she is moved from host family to host family as the war continues to pick up and gradually makes it’s way to the United Kingdom as well. It’s very poignant and the pencil-sketch illustrations are an interesting change to a lot of the graphic novels that are out right now. This story is still aimed at a younger audience, so it never gets too brutal but it still is a hard hitting story, especially with everything else going on right now.

Silver Spoon #9/10

I know I’ve talked about these books before, but my library got some more since I last read them, so I’m continuing my way through the series. It’s about a teenaged boy who, after having a breakdown from the pressure he was feeling to study and succeeded, decided not to attend an academic, urban high school, but rather to apply for an agricultural high school so he could live in the dorms, far away from his parents. The series just gets more and more heartwarming as it continues. It’s all about failure and overcoming and how worth can be measured in different ways, and about family and understanding each other and coming together… but also about the realities of farming which aren’t always very nice, especially when it comes to finances and survival. It’s written by the mangaka behind Fullmetal Alchemist but I’ll be honest… I think I like this series more. It is honestly one of my all time favourite manga series, it just has so much heart.

Ruby Finds A Worry

aka Ruby’s Worry apparently? I can’t figure out why this has more than one title. I actually read it in French not English, so for me it was Le Souci de Calie. Regardless, this was a nice little picture book for talking about worries and anxieties with children… especially with the amount of Covid stress a lot of kids are dealing with. It explains in a really nice way how talking about anxieties are often the best way to make them more manageable, and how pretending nothing is wrong can just let it grow bigger and bigger. A good explanation for kids and possible a good reminder for adults.

War of the Realms: Journey Into Mystery

I read this because the Mcelroy family wrote it so I figured Hey! Why not give it a go! And I’m glad I did. Their brand of humour was all over it, and it made the story a delight to read. I don’t follow all of Marvel’s weirdness, so I didn’t actually know most of the characters (Miles and Kate were actually the only two I was familiar with) but they do a great job of introducing the characters and making them all feel distinct and interesting. I absolutely adore the Dog of Gods (God of Dogs) who is a very very good boy. And Miles is absolutely always a delight so you can’t really lose. It’s a single book that I think is a part of a larger plotline that I have zero interest in. This book is a fine one to read though if you don’t mind jumping into the middle of the action and just getting swept along for the ride. Also Mcelroys!

Witcher Omnibus

Bleh. Absolutely not worth it. All the misogyny and Dumb Bullshit that I hate in the original books and from video games in general. Honestly, Witcher III did way better by its characters than most of these short stories. The only one worth reading in it is Curse Of Crows – that one was actually really enjoyable, probably because it was about Ciri and had an actual fucking woman on the writing team. (Seriously guys what were you thinking with Fox Children that’s literally just a story from Season of Storms but done worse. Fuck off.) If you like The Witcher, go read Curse of Crows and skip every other story in this book.

Billy Stuart: Les Zintrépides #1

Another French (Quebecois) book I read, though I believe you can get it in English as well (Billy Stuart and the Zintrepids). It’s a chapter book / graphic novel hybrid, and was honestly a fairly fun little read. It’s in a similar vein to Geronimo Stilton but done much better in my opinion. The humour was funnier, the characters felt less like caricatures, and while it still used stylized fonts it was also less intrusive and eye-strainy than the Stilton books. Also when the story suddenly pivots into the main adventure and mystery of the series? Fantastic. Was not expecting a hell-beast to appear part way through the story. Very interested in reading more.

Over all, it was cute and funny, and I can see it being a good next step when children have read their fill of the Stilton series and want something similar but possibly a bit more involved and coherent.

#chatter #book review #book reviews #midnight sun #twilight #stephenie meyer #last book on the left #last podcast on the left #lpotl #binti #robert munsch #paperbag princess #marvel #war of the realms #journey into mystery #mcelroys #mbmbam #silver spoon #fma #the witcher #billy stuart #zintrepids #geronimo stilton #spiderman #canadian literature #canlit #cancon #manga #graphic novels #comics

[rowley-with-ackerman]

AHHHH! I’m so sorry this is so late! Here is one of your (belated) birthday fics! Happy birthday my dear @geekandbooknerd! This is my first time writing for Finan, but I hope you enjoy it….it’s a lil’ long...and a lil’ spicy for ya to make up for the lateness and cause its your birthday ;P

Based on the prompt: “If you wanted me to rip my clothes off, you should have just asked.” From the City of Bones by Cassandra Claire.

First Time - Finan x FReader (characters are eighteen years old and in their senior year of highschool)

Six months. That’s how long they’d been together. She couldn’t believe it! When Finan had first approached her she thought it was a joke. Haha get the geeky girl by publicly asking her out knowing full well that she’s into you just to turn her down. But...there was no punch line. No rejection. Just a sincere twinkle in the rumored playboy’s eyes that was begging her to agree and give him a chance. And so she did. Everyday happier than the last, but something was missing. They had already dropped the big L-bomb a couple months ago, but apart from some intense making out in the back of his camaro, they hadn’t really been all that physical. She had been prepared to stand her ground and make him wait, but he never pushed. Never even attempted to make moves either. ‘Maybe he’s just not that into me...’ She thought. She couldn’t help but compare herself to his previous girlfriends and how he was all over them all the time. And it stung, not knowing where she stood in that regard and how she could make it clear to him that she was ready..or atleast figure out if he even wanted her that way. It was always difficult to get a clear point across in person with his whole….everything. He was so sweet, always buying her flowers and snacks (she loved snacks, snack time was a certified meal in her opinion). And their dates were so considerate and thoughtful, the only thing lacking was sex if she was being honest. She’d never wanted anyone more. And he seemed not...interested. She’d always been teased about being too shy and not forward enough, not really going after what she wanted and all that. Maybe that’s what was wrong. He wanted someone more outgoing...she could do that. Or she could try anyway. His birthday was coming up, and if porn and romance novels had taught her anything, it’s that men loved birthday sex. So she devised a plan, and hoped she wasn’t too awkward to pull it off.

It had been three weeks and it was time. She was ready. She had gone shopping and purchased a silky nightgown. Her period isn’t expected for another week, she bought condoms (totally guessing at what the sizing meant but knowing that they stretch) and she had convinced Finan’s mom to vacate the house so she could surprise him with a romantic dinner. The plan was to make sure dinner was ready, eat together and make small talk and then she would escape up the stairs to “fetch his present” when really she would be lying on his bed waiting for him and calling out to say she needed help. It was perfect.

Dinner went off without a hitch, they talked about school and how his day had gone so far. ‘Now for part two.’ She looked at Finan and told him that she had hidden his present upstairs and she wanted to surprise him. So she excused herself and ran up the stairs. Barely able to contain her excitement. She changed in his room, lit the candles and laid on his bed, with one leg over the other and one arm holding her head up while the other rested across her stomach. “Finan! I need your help!” She called out, making sure to sound like she was struggling. “Are ya alright lass?” He sounded concerned, she felt bad for making him worry but she hoped what he was about to witness would make up for it. She heard him bounding up the stairs and she closed her eyes, unable to actually face him when the time came. “What did ya need my help - wh...what are ya doing?” He sounded confused...this wasn’t good and definitely not what she had imagined. She started to stammer as she opened her eyes and realized that he wasn’t looking at her. She couldn’t tell what stung more. “I just...I thought it would be a nice birthday present for you…” He turned to look at her then, his eyes wide and guarded. “I dinna want to upset ya, but what exactly possessed you to come up with such a scheme?” She could feel her eyes stinging like she was about to cry. She knew it, she knew that he didn’t want her that way. He was probably just waiting for the right time to end and go about his merry way while she faded into the background. “I’m sorry, it was stupid. Just forget it and I’ll go home and it’s fine.” She wasn’t sobbing yet thank god, she started to get up off the bed and gather her things. She felt hands on her waist and he turned her around and she went to push him away not wanting to hear his farewell speech. But her bracelet got caught on the buttons of his dress shirt and ripped it open. She felt her eyes go wide and she panicked. Suddenly feeling like an even bigger fool than before she tried to wiggle her way out his strong grip but he wasn’t letting up. He pulled her in tight to his body and lifted her chin to meet his gaze. “Oi! If ya wanted me to rip my clothes off, you should have asked. And secondly where is all of this coming from? You gotta help me out here lass.” How he managed to both be cheeky and concerned is beyond her. She stuffed her face into his neck and mumbled out the whole story, about how she remembered him being with others to how she felt he didn’t want her that way. By the time she had finished they were snuggling on the floor of his room with the quiet slowly closing in on them.  “Listen my darlin’, I’ve waited because I didn’t want to pressure you and because you’re worth waiting for. Your first time should be special and you should be sure. Not rushed. I appreciate the thought that went into this, but it’s not necessary. You don’t have to push yourself to try and be like everybody else. That’s what I love so much about you. How you stay so true to yourself. I love you for you, not for what I think you can give me.” She paused then, really trying to let his words soak into her bones. All this time she thought that she just wasn’t enough or that his love didn’t run that deep. Never really understanding what he saw in her. The science nerd with social anxiety and poor communication skills. But here he was, still being his amazing self and praising her for….existing, essentially. And her wants didn’t change, which was surprising. She knew that she wanted him but she thought it was also a backwards way of her needing to have him wanting her. The fact that there was no weight to be lifted off of her shoulders, no immediate relief that she didn’t have to go through with it just reaffirmed that this was really was for her. She wanted him to be her first because of who he is and how he loves her. And how much she loves him. “Finan...please don’t wait anymore. I don’t want to wait anymore. I love you and you love me and yes I wanted to surprise you for your birthday...but more than that I just wanted to feel wanted by you. That hasn’t changed. Please, I want you. And I want this to be with you.” She felt so silly basically begging her boyfriend to have sex with her on HIS birthday. But it felt important to you, and it felt important to do tonight, you just hoped he understood that. “Why is this so important to you? I’m a patient man, I can wait.” She couldn’t believe how dense he was being. “Because I want you and I love you. Is it so wrong to want you to want me back? To physically feel how much you love me and experience a new way of loving you? To be closer to you than anyone else and just...be together?” His arms tightened around her waist. He looked like he was struggling with something in his mind, but she stayed quiet and just waited. Knowing he’d speak when he was ready. Grumbling under his breath, he whispered out “...you could drive a saint to sin, do ya know that?” almost like it wasn’t meant for her to hear.

Finan didn’t say anything more, just helped her off the floor and kissed her long and hard. Like he was committing it to memory. Taking her by the hand and leading her to the bed he gently pushed her down to a seated position, sliding her white negligee off her shoulders kissing the newly exposed skin as it appeared to him. Working his way down her body until he reached the line of her silk panties, he laid his hand on her belly and pushed her down, giving him enough access to remove said obstacle with his teeth so that he could get to what he really wanted. Seeing her fully laid out before him in all her glory he could barely contain himself. The things he would do to this woman, he relished the thought of the long hours it would take to completely fulfill his desires and unravel her. He couldn’t wait to see the look on her face as she was driven to new pleasure filled heights. He began by kissing and nipping up her legs, lightly tracing his fingers over every invisible mark left behind, until he reached his target. He was gently kissing her folds, dipping his tongue in ever so slightly until her first breathy exhale reached his ears. He then greedily dove in lapping at her slick heat and smearing her juices all over his face, he couldn’t get close enough, she tasted so sweet and smelled so intoxicating. They had only just begun and he was already being driven mad by his need for more of her. His hands began roaming her body, aching to touch and tease her out of her shell and into a wanton mess. He found purchase on her breasts, pawing at them and rolling her nipples between his fingers. Her breathing became heavier and he delved his tongue deeper inside her, silently begging her to give him more as he applied pressure. She was so gloriously wet, he never wanted to stop, he wanted to hear her moan and cry out his name. To fill her with a passion and satisfaction she had never known. He could feel her body starting to tremble, unused to this particular brand of torture. He slowed his pace ever so slightly and changed tactics. Pulling her body closer to him, he withdrew a hand from her breast and started to trace her outer lining before thrusting into her, first with one and quickly progressing to two fingers as she became louder. Instead of merely lapping at her folds he decided the sweetest ascent would be to suck at the top of her apex, her most vulnerable area becoming exposed to him. At the first tug she cried out and a hand shot to his hair, grabbing a handful and holding him as close as possible. He quickened his suckling, becoming too impatient to wait for her to slowly release. Her juices were flowing more heavily now, dripping down his face and onto the sheets below, her breathing more rapid and shallow than it was before. He thrust three fingers inside her, hard and fast, while dancing between trying to suck her dry and creating more fluid by lapping at her. It was during one of these exchanges that her legs began to shake, her cries more desperate, she was almost there. Soon he would taste her sweet climax, swaying her down until he brought another. He continued to sweep his tongue over her, speeding up as much as possible, he felt her inner walls clamping down around his fingers and her legs tense around his head. She shouted her orgasm, thrashing her head about while he continued his ministrations, his pace lessened to a caress. Once she had stopped shaking, he swiped a hand over his damp face, and crawled up her body leaving more kisses and bites in his wake until he was lying beside her. Tangling his hands in her hair he kissed her full on the mouth, diving his tongue in to meet hers, making her taste her own fluids from his mouth. The moan he received was encouragement enough to keep going. He drifted to her ear, pulling the lobe between his teeth and murmured “That wasn’t quite a scream, but I’ll get one out of you before we’re through.” And in one swift movement, pulled her on top of him and finally thrust into her with his aching member, she whimpered at the sudden intrusion and a few tears slipped free. He was much bigger than his fingers and the stretch burned. It felt like something had snapped inside her. “Now, the fun really begins.” As he let her adjust, he stroked her hair and wiped her tears, reassuring her that she was so good and took it so well. Finan was a firm believer in ripping the bandaid off and he didn’t want to prolong her pain. He tried to distract her by peppering her neck with kisses and gently fondling her breasts. Hoping his ministrations would make up for the lack of preparation and that the chosen position would provide her with the greatest pleasure and control. As her discomfort started to wane he felt her making small movements with her hips, testing the waters so to speak. He decided to try and help guide her by putting his hands on her hips, gently circling them around his cock. She started to get the hang of the movements on her own, raising herself up and down creating friction between them and causing a delicious feeling of wet tight heat around him. He knew they didn’t have all night but by God did he wish they did. The room was filled with their heavy pants and the sound of skin slapping on skin. Finan watched her ride him, her skin glistening with sweat and her thighs quivering with exertion. She was so beautiful and he was so lucky. He lifted her off of him and raised his eyebrows and the whimper she released at being dislodged. “Relax love, just switching angles.” As he flipped her back onto her back he inserted himself once more. Able to set the pace, he started thrusting harder into her. Wanting to make sure she could feel his absence the next day. He sucked love bites on to her collar bone and whispered sweet nothings in her ear about how much he loved her and how he wanted to see her fall apart on his cock. Her breathing was getting more breathy and her moans louder. He himself wasn’t fairing much better. Feeling a heat pool in his lower abdomen. Knowing he was getting close he wrapped her arms around his back “Hold on tight lass, and don’t worry if ya leave marks.” He kissed her hard then as he started pistoning his hips deep inside her. Fast strokes bringing them both closer to the edge. His moans matching her own as he chased both of their climaxes. He angled his hips differently so as to cause a little bit of friction on her sensitive bud as he pumped in and out of her. She herself didn’t know how much longer she could last, all she knew was that she felt so good and that she never wanted this to end (cliche teenager she’s aware). But it was honestly perfect. Being able to rake her hands through Finan’s hair and down his back. Kissing him for all she’s worth and feeling him all around her. It felt like both hours and mere seconds had passed when she screamed her release into his neck crying out his name. Clutching him tightly while he thrust a few more times, groaning his own release with her name like a prayer on his lips. They collapsed together in a heaping sweaty mess on the bed, still intertwined  exchanging lazy kisses while they came down from their high.

Never in a million years would she have pictured this moment. But here it was. Perfect, with the perfect guy and she had never felt more….just more in her life. She could feel everything he felt about her through his movements, how much he wanted her and how hard he’d held back all these months...how much he loved and cherished her. She only hoped now that he knew it was entirely mutual. That she was so hopelessly gone on him, it might even be funny. “Finan...that was amazing.” He looked at her then, with droopy eyes and a goofy grin. “Aye lass, it was. I love you.” Her heart swelled as she repeated the sentiment back to him. “Happy birthday Finan, I love you too.”

#finan x reader #the last kingdom #fanfiction #the last kingdom fics #happy birthday

[tsarinastorm]

Old Wounds, New Roommates-Adam Sackler/Reader-Chapter 2

Chapter 1

ONE YEAR AND SIX MONTHS AGO

Ever since your hookup with Adam, he’s texted you every day, and you had had another intense fucking sessions.  You had thought things were going well, but tried not to think too much into it. He was clearly a damaged soul that was processing a lot lately. He had went from some girl before Hannah to Hannah to some other girl back to begging for Hannah back to Jessa to you. That’s why you were surprised and tried to act nonchalantly when he informed you of his ‘feelings’ one day.

               “I like you, I really like you. I never thought I could feel like this again but with you I feel it.” He tells you while holding your hand to his chest, his eyes never leaving yours. He was looking at you with such adoration, you fell for it. He then insisted on taking you on a real date, you reluctantly agreed.

               Now sitting at the restaurant, he’s already twenty minutes late. The waiter keeps coming to your table to ask if you need anything. More wine is definitely needed. You’re giving him ten more minutes then you’re leaving. You scold yourself because you should have never expected anything from him. Furthermore, you were growing furious because you were normally the one in control of your relationships and here you were getting played. You knew better.

               It had been three weeks since Adam stood you up and he never had the decency to shoot you a text with an explanation…

                                                                               *******

PRESENT

               A lot had changed since your debacle with Adam Sackler over a year and a half ago. Now, you had two best-sellers under your belt, granted they were closer to memoirs based on your life. You wrote them to joke and parody your own life. It wasn’t your best work, but you were still happy that they were published under a pen name. Your next venture was historical fiction, and writing history books, your true passion. The novels brought you enough cash to pay off a majority of your student debt, and pay for your travels. You had spent most the past year doing promotional work around the world then leisurely travel. Either way, it burnt through your bank account fast.

               At the moment you were crashing at a friend’s apartment with your dog, Salem, and cat, Olive, joining you while your belongings were still in storage. You had given yourself a week to find a place. It was proving to be difficult: you needed a roommate because you would become depressed living on your own, and you didn’t want to live in Manhattan, and you had a limited budget at the moment. To add to the problems, most of the potential roommates were not roommate material. You were near your breaking point, something had to give.

               On top of everything you already had going on, you were almost ran over by Adam Sackler on a bike. Talk about a blast from the past. You couldn’t deny that he looked even better than you remembered: his hair was now slightly longer and he was even more toned. He also threw out there that he and his girlfriend broke up pretty quickly in your conversation. He was your biggest mistake: you shouldn’t have gotten attached and you shouldn’t have let him play you like that. Now all was left of your feelings for him was a burning rage, and deep down below that, a desire for him.

               You walk into Ray’s coffee shop to re-caffeinate and catch up with him. As you wait in line, you notice that Adam is there near the register. You really can’t a catch a break lately. You order your usual and do your best to ignore Adam. Luckily, Ray keeps the conversation going.

               “Hey, Y/N, how’s the apartment and roommate search going?” Ray asks as he hands your coffee.  You take it and decide to let it cool, you needed caffeine but it wasn’t worth the mouth burn.

               “Horrible. You should see some of the options.” You admit and settle near the register. There’s not a line so you standing there it shouldn’t disturb much. You can tell that Adam’s purposefully eavesdropping on your conversation. Typical. Shouldn’t he be worried about his own acting gigs, or one of the many exes or future exes you’re sure he has around.

               “Why don’t you wanna live alone again?” Ray ponders as he cleans the counter top, before leaning on it with his elbows. Ugh, this again. You have to remind people how screwed up you are, how much you’ve screwed up your life.

               “Because I’m miserable living alone, and it’s better for me to split rent at the moment.” You’re silently praying that Ray takes the hint and drops the topic. You’d prefer not to talk about it at all, let alone in front of the banes of your life: Adam Sackler. Ray however, is not dropping it, instead he focuses in on one of comments.

               “Wait, did you fly through your profits already?” Ray gives you a judging look that resembles a scowl. You feel like you’re being scolded by one of your parents. You roll your eyes as you answer.

“Yeah between paying off my student debt and traveling, it went by pretty fast.” You grind your teeth, a bad habit, and give him a stern look in return. Hopefully, he’ll get the hint this time. To your surprise and chagrin, it’s Adam who chimes in next.

“I have an extra room you’re welcome to it. I just redid it.” He turns toward you now, both you and Ray stare at him shocked.  Adam then continues sipping on his drink like nothing happened.

“You serious?!” Ray shouts, and you add in with, “What?”

               “I added on, it’s a nice bedroom and has its own bath. You can stay there. The rent is fixed for me so the price shouldn’t be a problem.” The initial reaction is: fuck no, you would leave the city and go move in with your parents before you’d move in with Adam. Then, you thought that Adam was better than most of the roommate options you had met so far. He might be your last choice, but then again, you’re at your last choice.

               “Can I see the room before I make a decision?” You ask, because knowing Sackler the room could either be very nice or it could be a total disaster. There was little room for middle ground with Sackler. Also you’re curious if the place looks as disheveled as it did the last time (one other time) you were there. If so, you would need to do a thorough cleaning before moving in.

“Oh I have a dog and cat, is that okay?” You think that the apartment will have to be pet-proofed. Adam runs his hands through his hair before nodding saying, “That shouldn’t be a problem.”

               “Wait, are you really considering this? Have you lost your fucking mind?” Ray puts his hands up in the air, and waits for you tell him that you’re joking, that this is some kind of joke. Your face stays serious because you definitely need some place to live ASAP. You ignore Ray and keep your eyes on Adam.

               “Ya, want to go now?” Adam asks as he motions his head in the direction of the door.

“Yeah.” You gather up your bag and your coffee, prepared to go. Adam heads out the door, waits for you by the doorway, and you’re right behind him. Ray gives you an incredulous look and you explain, “I want to see if there are proper floorboards.”

“Why would the floorboards matter?” Ray asks before he turns back to cleaning the counter or whatever he’s doing.

“In case I end up having to hide a body…” You joke but it’s the truth, it might end up being reality. If you weren’t desperate you wouldn’t even consider living with Adam: it was a catastrophe waiting to happen. Desperate times call for desperate measures.

****

When you get to the apartment, after a one-sided conversation with Adam on the walk over, you’re surprised that it’s cleaner than last time. Apparently, Adam is a nervous talker, and can actually clean on occasion. The apartment isn’t as well kept as when Ray was living there but you could live with it.

“Your room is back here.”  Adam leads you back through the hallway, and you find yourself checking out his book collection. You also notice that the yellow sofa hasn’t left even though it should probably be retired.

“My maybe room.” You correct him as you follow him. Of course the apartment smells like him and it brings back memories that you’d prefer to forget even though they’re sketched in your memory. When you walk into the added room, you can’t help but let out a sharp inhale as you take it all in. It’s stunning, and surprisingly roomy for New York.

“This is actually nice, did you do all of this?” You head into the bathroom, which has a new shower with tub, and a sink with decent counter space. In New York there was never enough space unless you were a billionaire, but you could see yourself living here. Though you might have to wear noise-cancelling headphones and blinders to avoid your roommate.

“Yeah, I like to do this kind of stuff.” Adam answers, downplaying his craftsmanship. When you walked back into the bedroom, you notice that the walls are still white, and not painted. Adam breaks your train of thought by asking, “What do you think?”

He waits for your answer, and you can tell he’s waiting for you to rip into the place. You turn to look at him, placing your hands on your hips. You tell him, “I have only one question: can I paint it?”

Adam gives you that goofy smile that you’ve always been fond of, before agreeing, “Yeah no problem. Just preferably not hot pink or some shit like that.”

And just like that, you’re going to be roommates with a former fuck buddy, who stood you up and played you in the past. Maybe Ray was right, maybe you had lost your damn mind.

******

The new living situation was tempestuous at best. Adam had a habit of being a slob and leaving glasses of milk around the apartment at all hours. Then, there was the case of his tools which were quickly spreading throughout the common areas of the apartment. The worst was the nights: he was in and out all night, up and down. You had to get up and be productive and he should be too but apparently he preferred to live like the struggling artist.

You were hoping that tonight would be different: he might go to bed at a decent hour like the rest of civilized society. All of those hopes crashed when you heard a woman’s voice talking on the other side of the wall. This was not going to be a fun night, at all.

“Do you like my cock, you fucking whore?” You hear Adam ask on the other side of the wall.

“I really like your cock,” you hear the unknown woman answer back.

You roll over to your side, and turn up the volume of your headphones. That works for a short period of time because soon you can hear the bed hitting the wall. The bed’s hitting the wall to the point it’s making your own headboard rattle from the vibrations. You try in vain to knock against the wall, hoping they’d get the hint. Sadly, it doesn’t even phase them.

Then, the moaning and screaming starts. Adam is groaning and grunting, while his companion is screaming his name like a chant. This continues for several moments until the woman says, “Adam, fuck, I’m cumming.”

“Fuck, fuck where do you want me to cum?” You hear Adam say, followed by a response, “Cum outside.”

               “You’d like that, huh, for me to fucking cover you in my cum?” The woman moans something intelligible back that you can’t discern. After a few thrust that you hear through the wall, it’s over as you hear Adam let out a guttural moan. Now, you just hope that it was a one round night, and hope that the girl doesn’t stay the night.

               Round two did happen, loudly, and right when you had just gotten to sleep. You did think that you heard the girl leave earlier, and did not want to ever encounter whoever she was. You would however make sure Adam knew how you felt. Some people actually have to wake up in the morning have some semblance of a routine. You put the food in Salem’s and Olive’s respective bowls then pour yourself a cup of extra strong coffee and make a bowl of cereal.

               Adam comes out of the room as if on cue. He’s only wearing a pair of black briefs, and you can’t help but ogle him just a little bit. He was toned and in shape when you met him, but now he’s built like Adonis, and his longer hair only adds to the likeness. You stop yourself from admiring his bulge, you already know what his dick is like, and know what he’s like in bed: mindblowing.

               That thought process reminds you that you’re still pissed that his escapades kept you up all night. You wait to say something when he’s sat down across from you and eating his own cereal.

“Did you have fun fucking the Banshee last night?” You ask as you sip your coffee. Shock goes across his face, he looks embarrassed for a moment then he covers it with cool arrogance.

“I did…thanks for your concern.” He answers. His cool, smug demeanor pisses you off more. Not only did he keep you up all night having to listen to him to fuck, now he has the nerve to pretend it’s no big deal.

“I could tell. I could hear it. You can keep it down, no one wants to hear a porno being made.”  You tell him sternly, squinting your eyes at him, and then getting up to put your cup in the sink. You put in there loudly, to exaggerate your frustration.

“If I didn’t know better, I’d think you were jealous.” Adam has the nerve to say as you begin retreating into your room. His comment makes you halt and stalk back into the kitchen.

“Ha! Why would I be jealous? Have you forgotten I’ve already been on that ride?” You cock your head to the side and cross your arms. Adam is looking at you with eyes that are a hot amber, he’s trying to provoke you. You see his jaw twitch in frustration to your comment.

“Which is why you know you’re missing out. You miss me fucking your brains out.” Adam stands and is invading your personal space.  You’d almost forgotten how much taller he was than you. You hadn’t forgotten what kind of sexual chemistry you had, the chemistry has now turned to tension as your eyes stay locked on one another’s. You wanted to punch him, stay away from him, but you also want to kiss him, to fuck him so hard that he’s absolutely wrecked.

Instead, you provoke him by hitting him where you know it will hurt.

“Uh no…it wasn’t that good.” You know there are three possible results from what you just said. One, you’ll hate each other even more. Two, you’ll end up fucking right here and now. Or three, a combination of one and two. Adam’s eyes darken and his brow furrows as he takes a step closer to you.        

#adam sackler #adam sackler x reader #adam driver #adam sackler x you #hbo girls

[italkaboutbooks]

An in depth review of Aurora Rising by Jay Kristoff and Amie Kaufman//Part 1

So...I usually don’t do this kind of thing. Normally on this blog I just give simple, non-spoiler reviews. And then I give that certain book a stared rating out of five. And then I move on with my life.

But I’m starting to realize, that I may not be able to do that. At least, not for the YA sci-fi novel Aurora Rising, written by Jay Kristoff and Amie Kaufman.

I have a lot of thoughts on this book. I have read many reviews by other people about this book. The reviews I read were very mixed. Some people loved it and gave it 4-5 stars, and others hated it giving it 1 star. But for me, I cannot sum up my thoughts on this book with a rating out of 5, or any number for that matter. No, I have to get into the nitty gritty of this book, and explain every thought I ever had about this book.

So this is very obvious, but this will be an extremely spoilery post. I am not holding back on the spoilers, you have been warned.

Intentions

I feel like when analyzing everything Aurora Rising did, you have to understand what the authors intended it to be. Because I personally believe that Aurora Rising is just meant to be a fun time. It’s not meant to be profound, or deep, or revolutionary. I think Kristoff and Kaufman just wanted to write a light-hearted sci-fic novel about teenagers in a space academy. When I read the synopsis of this book, I could easily tell just by the tone that this wasn’t a book to take seriously, and it was just supposed to be a fun time.

And I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. If you like reading stories that are just fun, good for you. I understood that when I read this book, and I think that’s why I gave it 4-stars on goodreads. Because I enjoyed it. But a part of me has to ask, does writing stories solely for fun, take away something from the story? It’s a debate that has no end, and I understand that, but here’s what I think.

Stories intended for fun? Totally cool. Sometimes we just want something fun without any messages that challenge us, even though those are extremely important. But sometimes I can’t help but wonder, especially in reading this book, what if you changed this or improved on this? Because that would make the story have more meaning.

One could argue that the most profound stories are the ones that are also fun and light-hearted. Take Disney and Pixar for example. Ignoring the questionable stuff that they as a corporation are, they have movies that are fun and light-hearted, and yet are still meaningful and can withstand time. Basically, stories can do both. Be fun and meaningful at the same time. And this might be the main problem with Aurora Rising.

Personally, I think Aurora Rising is a fun story, with little sprinkles, tiny sprinkles of meaningfulness. However some reviews said that the authors didn’t really care about making the readers care, and a part of me agrees with them. Because Aurora Rising is intended to be fun, and while that is enough for most people, and myself. I can’t help but wonder, how much better it could’ve been.

Plot

The plot of Aurora Rising is pretty basic in my opinion. However, I saw a reviewer say that it completely ripped off Firefly so...that’s disappointing to hear. Especially since these authors are apparently big names. Tyler Jones goes to a space academy, and misses the draft, a.k.a the event where graduates choose their coworkers for the job they’ve been working for years to get. Tyler misses the draft, because he received a distress call from a ship that’s about to explode, but there’s a sleeping girl there.

So Tyler gets grouped with the “worst of the worst” reputation wise and there’s also a poor girl who is trying to cope with the fact that literally everyone she knows is dead, and that she’s been sleeping for centuries.

So this girl does some creepy things and it turns out she has a bigger role to play in the fate of the world and Tyler and this gang of misfits get themselves wrapped up in it.

Pretty simple, really. There’s not much I can say on the plot. It’s not bad, it’s pretty basic. I don’t really care for basic plots. As long as the characters are great, whether they’re likeable or intriguing, I’m fine. However, I have one huge problem with the plot. And that is the ending of part 2.

The novel is separated into three parts.

Specifically, chapters 18-24. Let me try to explain to you what happens, because it had left me so confused.

So, Aurora (the girl who was asleep) keeps having strange visions. It had led the group to a black market planet essentially. The person who runs this “planet” is a criminal, I believe, who has the strongest security in the universe. The main gang is trying to break into the “criminal’s” place to steal a statue from him. There’s also a murder hungry beast that guards the place. Basically, it’s a suicide mission.

Cat, one of the characters, does not agree on following through with the plan, and for good reason to. They get into a fight about it, and Cat storms off to a bar to drink her feelings away.

While she’s at this bar, getting drunk (not a good state to be making decisions btw) the GIA comes to her. All you need to know about the GIA, is that they are looking for Aurora, and they are not going to be nice to her when they get her. They are here, because they want Aurora, and they tell Cat that. They also tell her that if she just gives them Auri, then her other crewmates, will be fine. Off the hook.

So, this girl is leading the people you care about into a dangerous situation, and people come up to you and say that if you tell them where that girl is, everything will be okay. Oh, and you’re currently drunk, and not thinking straight. What would you probably do? In this situation, I would say that you would sell Auri out.

When I read this scene, it seemed pretty simple to me. Cat was going to reveal Auri’s location, and the GIA would take her, and everyone would be pissed at Cat. But that’s not what happened.

We don’t get a scene of Cat actually selling Auri out.

The chapter ends, and in the next chapter, Cat is back with the others, going through with the plan. So I was thinking, “okay, she sold them out, but she obviously hasn’t said that, but then the GIA is going to come, and the plan would fail.”

But here’s what happens.

Cat, Tyler and Auri get super close to their goal. And the the person who ran the place caught up to them. He isn’t happy because they were breaking and entering. Then, the GIA comes, and I’m thinking that it’s game over. Cat betrayed them. They’re like, “we just need Auri but it’s okay you can beat the others up.”

Cat goes, “That wasn’t the deal.” And Tyler goes, “what deal?”

Cat basically confessed that she sold the squad out, and Tyler is rightfully upset about that. They get into an argument which turns into a fight. The GIA takes Auri away, and now I’m thinking, “Cats mistake caused Auri to fall into the wrong hands. The third part is going to be them saving her. Maybe Cat will have an arc surrounding this.”

You wanna know what happens next? The GIA agents take out the “bad guys,” and take off their masks to reveal that they were actually members of the squad all along.

What? What??

How did this happen? Does this make any sense to you? If you have read the entire book, did you understand what happened? Because I don’t have a clue how any of that made any logical sense.

Listen, I know what an unreliable narrator is, and I’m not saying it’s bad. However, if your story is so confusing that I don’t even believe that an event could’ve happened, you did something wrong.

I literally skimmed through the book again to remember what happened and I’m still confused and upset.

I think what happens is that Cat does sell Auri out, but she tells the squad what she did. And they’re apparently cool with it, and don’t get mad at her. None of these scenes are shown, so two of the members go to get GIA disguises, and it turns out that everything went according to plan all along, even though the readers are lead to believe the opposite.

I hate it. I hate it so much. I hate it because it just leaves you asking what was genuine characterization and what was just “acting” to go along with the plan. Like, did Cat actually get upset at the plan originally? Was that fight when Tyler finds out Cat sold them out a genuine fight of betrayal and anger? I don’t know. A part of it may be because I’m dumb, but I think this part in general was also way too confusing for its own good.

Not to mention that it throws out an opportunity for a character arc in Cat, that was thrown out of the window and replaced with something much cheaper in my opinion.

Personally, I wished that Cat did betray the squad and Auri does get taken by the GIA. But during the heist, Auri saves Cat (that’s an actual event btw,) from a monster. This could make Cat regret selling Auri out. Then, Cat could go and personally save Auri, as a way to amend her actions and give her an arc. I think that would’ve been much better.

But we didn’t get that. And it’s what I hate the most about the plot. I have more complaints about chapters 18-24, but we’ll get to those later.

So I’m now looking over what I just wrote, and I’m realizing that I need to split this up into more than one part. So this is part one of my deep dive thoughts on Aurora Rising. If you want to see part two, I recommend following me. Hopefully, I don’t make you regret that choice.

Part 2// Part 3

#bookblr #book reader #book review #ya book review #books on tumblr #books #bookblogger #aurora rising

[nadziejastar]

Master Xehanort touched down in Radiant Garden and surveyed its surroundings. The ruler of this world was said to research the heart through different methods than the Keyblade Masters. Though the man's studies did interest him, it was not yet time.

Master Xehanort strolled around this world and found a lone man. He had a dangerous look in his eyes that concealed a darkness in his heart incomparably greater than that of anyone else in Radiant Garden. 

No matter the world, one didn't have look far to find hearts infested with darkness. After all, no heart was entirely free of it. It all boiled down to proportions; a little nudge to a heart with more darkness than light, and everything would begin falling into place.

"You there." Master Xehanort had seen several people dressed in the same uniform as this man.

"...What do you want, ya old coot?" The man with dark, slicked-back hair turned around with annoyance. Master Xehanort's golden eyes regarded him.

Exactly. It really doesn’t make any sense how easily those two became apprentices. Since when can any random person just knock on the front door and talk to Ansem, anyways? Dilan and Aeleus were the guards. They knew Lea and Isa were trespassers. Plus, they had secret evil experiments they didn't want Ansem to know about. Why on earth would they ever grant those two kids an audience with Ansem the Wise? If they knew that those two trespassers wanted to talk to Ansem, it's more likely that they would have just kidnapped them on the spot and locked them up, rather than letting them get access to Ansem the Wise. 

And so we stand before the castle gates today, not as trespassing children but in order to become Ansem the Wise's newest apprentices.

Ansem was apparently not someone who casually interacted with the general public. Leon, Yuffie, Cid, and Aerith had NO idea what the ruler of Radiant Garden looked like or how old he was. They all thought Ansem Seeker of Darkness was the real Ansem until Mickey told them otherwise. It didn't seem like many people knew much about him. In the novel, Axel saw Ansem the Wise on the Hollow Bastion computer screen and had no clue who he was. Mickey was able to see Ansem because he was a king from another world. Lea and Isa were just two school kids---nobodies.

Xehanort was never planning on losing his memory after gaining Terra as his new vessel. But he did plan on becoming an apprentice. And even then, he knew he couldn’t just knock on the front door and ask to become one. That’s weird and suspicious. It’s why Master Xehanort had to go through Braig. Without Braig, Xehanort would have never gotten anywhere near Ansem. And Xehanort was of particular interest to Ansem not just because he was a random unconscious person, but because he was discovered with Aqua's armor and Keyblade next to him. He was a very interesting subject to a scientist studying the secrets of the heart. What do Lea and Isa offer a KING other than an opportunity to babysit?

Subject was found in the central square shortly after dawn. Female, approximately fifteen years old. After seven days' observation, she spoke her first words, but could not provide a name. Subject exhibits signs of profound amnesia, and displays concern for which world this is. Her words suggest that she departed her home world with others, though she cannot recall the names of her erstwhile companions. All efforts to explore those memories have met with a rejection response.

After his initial experiments on me, Ansem the Wise ceased his research into the heart, his hand stayed by some fear I cannot fathom. Yet this new subject is like me: devoid of memories. She is the perfect sample upon which to continue my master's work. She, too, could benefit from it; by traversing the heart, we have a direct path into memory. I myself have begun to reclaim my lost past thanks to these very experiments.

Who is she? Whence has she come? These are questions no scientist could ignore. And the words she muttered, "May your heart be your guiding key"...

I still think the name "Subject X" was originally Isa, but now that I think about it, she kinda rips off of Terranort, too. An amnesiac from another world who was discovered in the central square? When Aqua was fighting Terranort, it was nighttime. So, when Ansem discovered Terranort, it probably would have been...shortly after dawn. Subject X departed from their home world with other friends, but can’t remember their names? Sounds like Terranort, too. He’d probably remember he had two important friends, but not their names. So Ansem wanted to help him remember his past. Man, nothing about Subject X is unique at all. She’s just a hodgepodge of different characters.

As noted in my earlier reports, I must solve the mystery of this "darkness of the heart." This paradise depends on it. I shall perform an experiment to probe the depths of a person's heart. One of my own apprentices, Xehanort, has volunteered to be a subject.

The young man has served me ever since I nursed him back from death's door some years ago. He had lost all his memories at the time, but later showed remarkable intellectual curiosity and readily absorbed my teachings, gaining deep wisdom. Any mental immaturity is surely due to his young age.

If I explore Xehanort's heart with psychological tests, I may be able to recall the past locked away within. My apprentice Even has also shown great interest in Xehanort's memories. But is he really the right subject? Xehanort does indeed exhibit extraordinary talents...Too extraordinary...Perhaps they are even superhuman.

Xehanort was a very unique person. He was an amnesiac that needed to be nursed back to health, but he also just happened to be mysterious and brilliant. Ienzo was an orphan whose parents were friends with Ansem or Even. They are exceptions. That doesn't mean anyone could just knock on the front door and become an apprentice. Why would Ansem just take on two random kids with no scientific background?

Not to mention that Lea and Isa apparently asked to become apprentices after Subject X was discovered by Ansem, since she was gone already. At that point, Ansem would have been aware that his apprentices were kidnapping people and that there were Heartless in his castle. He just experienced the worst betrayal of his life by the last apprentice he took in. Why on earth would he allow two suspicious kids in his castle at that point? I’m sure the other apprentices would have informed Ansem that they were trespassers.

“Most kids spend the time just messing around with their friends. They put off the homework until the end and then help one another finish it.”

He was apparently speaking from personal experience. Was Axel referring to his own memories of summer vacation as a human?

“It’s not a bad way to spend your time. I hadn’t really thought about it since I became a Nobody…,” he murmured, almost to himself, before turning the conversation back to Roxas.

Also these are two underage kids who are still in middle/high school. How are they just going to become apprentices when they are still in school? They don't have any credentials. Ansem would need their parents’ permission, right?

“Stop changing the subject!” Olette scolded them.

“All right already…” Hayner stood up with a sigh. “You win. We’ll do the homework. Today’s the day for a pain-in-the-butt independent study project.”

Roxas had completely forgotten that there were any vacation assignments until now. Only three more days, and then it was back to school.

Since Isa was in such a hurry, I almost wonder if he was thinking Lea wanted to sneak into the castle simply as a way to put off doing their homework.

“We’d like you to tell us if anything’s changed in this town. There are heaps of weird things here, right…? Like, the strange stone steps, for example…”

Roxas watched Axel and Pence’s exchange. For him to think of a question like that, when he’s only seen the map…

“Ohhh… So you guys are investigating the Seven Wonders of Twilight Town, too?” said Pence.

Roxas’s summer vacation was heavily based off of Axel’s memories. And the novel made it seem like Axel had experience with looking for the various wonders of the town. 

The castle was a wonderland to us children. Within its walls, Ansem the Wise conducted his research, and the fruits it bore allowed everyone outside to live in peace and happiness. That alone was enough to stoke our interest, though not all of the rumors that escaped its walls were so benevolent. By night, the muffled sounds of human wails emerged. There was talk of dangerous human experimentation. Lea and I couldn't help but hatch a plot to steal inside and sate our curiosity.

The point is, these are just innocent KIDS who like to play, eat ice cream, and explore the "wonders" of their town. They’re not secret agents. The castle was a wonderland to them. It's probably similar to how the haunted mansion and ghost train were for Roxas's group.

Lea---A likable, upbeat boy who tends to jump into things without consulting anybody else-sometimes with disastrous results. He seems to be hung up on other people remembering him, and taught Ventus the importance of making friends. He and his own best friend, Isa, have bigger plans.

Isa---A quiet and cool-headed youth. Though he does come out of his shell when talking to his best friend Lea, toward others he is distant and untalkative. He also often scolds Lea, who has an opposite (though complementary) personality.

I just don’t buy that Lea and Isa successfully convinced the KING to make them apprentices and infiltrated a group of criminals, all as part of some grand master plan. Two sheltered kids pulled off something like that and somehow didn’t get locked up and become test subjects themselves? Highly unlikely. BBS said that Lea always came up with plans that he’d jump into without thinking, with disastrous results. The journal seemed to be hinting that sneaking into the castle was something that...wasn’t a very bright idea and would lead to something very bad happening. Like getting kidnapped, locked up, then experimented on. And that’s a lot more believable of a scenario. Lea would do things without consulting anyone. Probably why Isa scolded him often.

“Don’t sit on that.”

“Then put another chair in here.” He let his legs swing, the way he would sit at the usual spot.

“Somehow, I doubt that would stop you,” said Saïx.

Judging by the way Saïx and Axel interact in the novel, Lea didn’t pay much attention to Isa’s scolding. I like the one little mini-comic where Axel was the accelerator and he called Roxas the brake. But he remembered that Roxas wasn’t actually the brake. It was “the other guy”. Isa was the brake. He’d try to reign in Lea’s hotheadedness. I definitely see it being Lea’s idea to sneak into the castle, not Isa’s. Lea probably didn't even consult Isa when coming up with the plan. They got caught trespassing multiple times, but Lea was always undeterred. Those aren't the actions of someone who knew that dangerous human experiments were going on.

Axel followed after him. “No, it’s just that there’s something about Riku I’m interested in. I want to check up on something, but I thought I’d just get your permission first.”

“Hmph… Even without my permission, you’ll go looking as you wish, won’t you?”

I'm sure Lea never imagined that anything bad could ever happen to them by sneaking into the castle. He seemed like he was very protective of Isa. If he knew there was loud wailing and rumors of dangerous human experiments going on in that castle, I HIGHLY doubt he would have brought Isa anywhere near it. Lea had a habit of jumping into things, but he was still a caring friend. I can't imagine that he would knowingly put Isa at risk like that. And I definitely don't think Isa would ever go along with that plan, either. He cared about Lea's safety and would have put the brakes on that plan REAL fast if he heard rumors of human experimentation.

“He worries too much. Thinks he has to help Sora do everything…” Axel grimaced in irritation.

“But, Axel, aren’t you the one worrying about Riku and Sora?” Naminé giggled softly.

“Me, worry? You think I need to be worried about those two?” He stretched backward and rocked the chair back and forth, like a restless child.

Axel probably blamed himself for what happened to them. He is obviously emotionally stunted in certain ways. He could be quite ruthless. But at the same time, he is hung up on things like having a best friend and eating ice cream. Bottom line is that these were just KIDS. They were naive. They didn’t know what they were getting themselves into. Didn’t sound like Lea was EVER prepared for the possibility that breaking into the castle was dangerous. 

#KH #kh meta #kh lea #kh isa #kh aqua #kh axel #kh braig #kh saix

[mercerislandbooks]

Romantic Reads for Fall

It is not February, but love is in the air. I’m blaming it on myself. I have been walking around with my head in the clouds, narrowly avoiding car accidents, and staring off into space when I should be writing. Reader, I’m going to marry him, I repeat to myself because my longtime boyfriend and I have, in fact, decided to get married.

Although of little consequence to anyone other than us and our family, it sparked the idea for this blog post. All summer I devoured contemporary romance novels, preparing myself for what I knew and hoped was to come (a proposal) and getting into a festively romantic mindset. Once properly proposed to, I decided to do a scholarly investigation into the history of the romance novel that would deepen the appreciation I already have today.

A couple years ago, my mom gave me a beautiful copy of the book The Prisoner of Zenda, telling me it was one of the first books that inspired the modern romance novel. Other than Jane Austen and Charlotte/Emily Brontë and George Eliot (more on that later), Anthony Hope’s The Prisoner of Zenda is a Ruritarian romance full of action and adventure. From this we think Cloud Atlas, The Great Race, North by Northwest, or The Princess Bride fantastic action-filled movies (and books) that wouldn’t know it, but found their start with the wild popularity of The Prisoner of Zenda. For this blog I decided to finally read it. and I was enchanted by our hero on page one. He’s sarcastic, witty, just a tiny bit pompous, and a complete doll. The story follows Rudolph Rassendyll, a man who has accomplished nothing in his life and thoroughly enjoyed the leisure afforded to him. On a whim, he takes a trip to Ruritania, where he is entangled in a plot to kill the king-to-be, who he looks exactly alike. He is convinced to take the place of the king at his coronation until the true king can be recovered. Hijinks and hilarious encounters ensue with a happy ending found by all (except the evil king-poisoner).

The Prisoner of Zenda came out post-Austen, actually influencing many dime novels of adventurous fiction. And though Austen is often lauded as creating the modern romantic story arc, I wondered if there was an agreed upon book in the western cannon that was the first romance novel. I stumbled upon Pamela or, Virtue Rewarded by Samuel Richardson, published in 1740 (70 years before Jane published Sense & Sensibility). This is the first novel in the western cannon to take the point of view of a woman and focus on her needs, desires, and experiences, with a happy ending. It is also deemed the first romance novel because a woman’s needs and desires at that time were completely taken over by the need for a husband. I had intentions of reading this book, and was even drawn to the epistolary structure of the novel, but when it came down to flipping from page five to six of the novel, I couldn’t do it. Richardson’s portrayal of Pamela was helpless and simpering, an extreme contrast to the powerful women of the contemporary romance novels I read. It was so unappealing to me that I gave up. 

Unlike Richardson, many of the female authors of the 1800s brought to light the complexity of female desire into the marriage plot. Elizabeth of Pride and Prejudice knows she needs to get married in order to not become penniless, but she is stubborn, independent, and judgmental so the thought of her marriage doesn’t take over every waking moment of her life (though her sister’s possible marriage does). Austen, Radcliffe, and the Brontë sisters all invested energy into the expression of women’s individual desires, turning their books into an ultimately escapist form of literature for the time in which they were published.

Today, the romance novel has boomed into a genre of its own. Despite its literary beginnings, it is often dismissed for its formulaic plots and bodice ripping covers. I believe the genre is in the middle of a renaissance, as authors all over the world are writing diverse, complicated, and thought-out characters. Today the romance genre is a billion dollar market, made up of specific plot points: a dominant love story and an emotionally satisfying and optimistic ending. The style of covers is changing to hand drawn characters, moving away from Fabio. I decided to read a couple new contemporary love stories to recommend to you from this fall, two adult and two young adult.

My favorite of all of them was Talia Hibbert’s new novel Get a Life Chloe Brown. This adult romantic comedy was touching, adorable, and so darn funny. Chloe Brown experiences a near-death experience pushing her to realize that she must get a life. Diagnosed with fibromyalgia over the past five years, Chloe realizes that she has let her chronic illness and anxiety around it keep her from participating in the excitement of life around her. She also needs to find new friends who will understand her lifestyle and admit her attraction to the superintendent that lives across the courtyard. I loved Chloe’s voice, the realistic depiction of chronic pain, and the complex characters that fall in love so sweetly. This is my new favorite for anyone who reads or wants to read a romance.

Next, I read Christina Lauren’s new Twice in a Blue Moon. This novel takes place half in England 14 years prior and half in California. Tate Jones is the daughter of a world-renowned movie actor (think Brad Pitt), kept in the shadows from paparazzi and the public eye. She meets Sam Brandis in London during vacation, their whirlwind romance crashing down when he sells out her identity and disappears. While Tate is able to become an actress with just as much heft to her name as her father’s (her secret life goal), she is heart-broken and bitter about the way her rise to stardom came to be. Fourteen years later, she steps on to a movie set for the film that is going to catapult her into award season and sees none other than Sam. This book took me through the full range of emotions, making me laugh, making me angry, and making me very happy. While I didn’t find Sam to be the most convincing love interest, Tate made up for it in spades. I loved her confidence, strength, and fragility. I didn’t really care who Tate ended up with, as long as she was happy.

As for the YA romances, I read Color Outside the Lines and 10 Blind Dates. They are vastly different! Color Outside the Lines is a collection of short stories edited by Sangu Mandanna about mixed-race couples. The stories ranged through all different cultures, worlds, and times in history. I personally adored the story written by Lori M. Lee about a Hmong girl who falls in love with a fallen star. The creativity and array of conflicts and interactions between the characters was refreshing. A great read for those who love short stories, fantastical worlds, and representations of race that celebrate and revel in each of their beauty.

10 Blind Dates was probably my second favorite book of the four that I read. Ashley Elston writes about a senior in high school from a big Italian family living in Louisiana. Sophie is ecstatic for her winter break because her parents are leaving to visit her pregnant sister and Sophie gets to spend one-on-one time with her boyfriend, alone. But all that excitement is flushed down the drain when she overhears her boyfriend say that he think she’s no fun and wants to break up soon. Sophie, devastated, takes refuge at her grandparents’ house and begins to reconnect with her extended family who she hasn’t seen consistently since the beginning of high school. To help her get over her lousy ex-boyfriend, they decide to set her up on ten blind dates throughout the break. Despite the silly premise, I absolutely adored the bond between Sophie and her family. They showed so much love and support, and Elston wrote a rich and beautiful backstory to Sophie’s friendships and relationships with family. I recommend this book to anyone who wants to smile, loves loud and goofy families, or a sweet love story about loving yourself before knowing who you want to love.

I hope you can find one or two books that speak to you! I certainly loved all of them, and there are so many more romances I’ve read that I could talk about. Come in if you want more recommendations!

Next week, Lori will be talking about her favorite books of 2019 next week.

--Kelleen

#romance #fall romance #island books #kelleen #kelleen cummings #the prisoner of zenda #color outside the lines #10 blind dates #twice in a blue moon #get a life chloe brown

[ravenvsfox]

ok bitch: 4, 6, 8, 15, 18, 41, & 48 for the fic writers ask meme

oh SHIT look at you go!! thanks babe ✨

4) What is your favourite genre to write for?

man I wish I could say I’m strong and multi-faceted but I actually gotta pass on fantasy and sci-fi

who has the time to build a world?? from scratch?? what the fuck

my wheelhouse tends to be drama and horror, plus the kind of magical realism that lends itself to fanciful description. I have lots of ideas for images and almost no ideas for plot, so I write kind of sad, wistful, circular stories lmao

6) If you had to delete one of your stories and never speak of it again, which would it be and why?

ah ew 

I have a buried fanfiction.net account that is FULL of completely humiliating fic that I would actively chew up and swallow just to be rid of it

My whole hard drive is full of fic so self indulgent and terrible that it never saw the light of day, thank CHRIST

we’re talking criminal minds self insert fic and glee crossovers, man

(also my first couple of prompts for aftg were like mediocre smut that can..... go)

8) Where do you take your inspiration from?

Like I read a lot a lot a lot, if I’m not reading novels for a few months I genuinely read hundreds of thousands of words of fanfiction

and I often find that I read a phrase in a story or poem and I’m like oh dope!! how can I steal that in a way that makes it totally different and also mine

Sometimes my mind is blank and I try to snap my fingers and make a metaphor, and what comes to me is the last thing I studied in class. So maybe I was reading about Actaeon, ripped apart by his own wolves. And that’s such rich territory to talk about like self doubt or betrayal. Or I learned about the naming system in ancient Rome -- I could talk about how sad it is to be a contortion of your father. 

I was recently listening to the audio book of I’ll give you the sun and I was like ohhh yah this book majorly inspired my style, and so did stief, and so did the way my brother talks, and so did griffin mcelroy, etc, etc

You inhale your culture and you exhale a story that’s how it goes, homie

15) If you write OC’s, how do you decide on their names?

keeping in mind that I’m the worst titler in the world lol

Honestly I usually just wrack my brain for the name that seems to fit the character outline and then I change it like 18 times when they inevitably sound too ebony darkness dementia ravenway

I had this wip where there was a fire-starter named simon, and then he became enzo like lorenzo (which is off the walls), and then I started calling him ren in my head a la footloose

and then sometimes I’m like okay this character is a leader and she’s from japan siri search japanese baby names meaning strong lol

18) Do you have any abandoned WIP’s? What made you abandon them?

Yeah dawg im tired

I was writing a doctor/patient au that I scrapped bc I got swept away in so many prompts

I started writing a oneshot where the feds arrest neil for the murder of his mother bc someone digs up her bones and they find his dna everywhere but I was like..... this is not that exciting a premise, so I left it for a rainy day ya know

I also wrote the first few chapters of a webcomic that eventually fizzled when the artist and I got busy, so yeah I feel like it’s usually more of a lack of time than a lack of passion.

41) What’s you favourite minor character you’ve written?

um idk if anyone remembers the shopkeeper that I wrote into my story about the twins?? A convenience store employee mistakes Aaron for Andrew and I liked that she was a sort of homely no nonsense person who liked drew better than aaron. like. what a character she would have to be for that to be true

I’ve written lots of tiny OCs that I probably like more, but this was one of my few fanfic characters that I was like. yeah. I could write 50 late night interactions between her and andrew

48) What’s your favourite trope to write?

I really like writing like... drift compatibility?? or its equivalent??? soulmates maybe? I love when two characters are very very in sync, and fiercely protective over one another to the point of self sacrifice

I also dig love confessions it’s my dirty secret as an andreil writer lmaooo I love tender helpless vocal love 

Fanfiction Writer Asks

#thank you for these rad ass questions sam I'm sorry it took me forever to respond #ask meme #long post #philosophium #ask

[frenchibi]

top 5 books

Hello friend!!!! This is areally really tough question bc I read so many different genres and have SOMANY FAVORITES so I’m going to cheat a little bit… I’ll give you Top3 or 4 (I have no impulse control) for several genres so you’ll get more than 5total but not like.. an inordinate number of books, ok? xD (Who am I kidding I’mgoing off the rails, no apologies)

Fantasy

The Name of the Wind(Kingkiller Chronicles Book 1) and sequel(s) by Patrick Rothfuss. Has beentalked about loads in fantasy circles and I have nothing to add other than“this is the best fantasy book I have ever read, and probably in the top 3 ofbest books I have ever read, period.” The style blew me a way, the characters are fantastic, the system of magic/power in this world is the coolest I have EVER SEEN and… yeah. I’m invested.

Howl’s Moving Castleand sequel(s) by Diana Wynne Jones. Y’all remember the ghibli movie? This isthe book this is based on and it is way, way better than the already fantasticmovie. It is ridiculously charming and witty and lovely and I recommendeveryone read it. You will not regret it. This is my ultimate comfort book, if that makes any sense.

Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett – a hilarious bookabout the apocalypse with absolutely amazing characters and incredible styleand wit. We’re getting a TV series this year and I am beyond stoked. Pleaseread this. It’s… just… yes. British fantasy is SO GOOD.

Honorable mention: Die Stadt der TräumendenBücher by Walter Moers. Theremight be an English translation of this, but honestly I only recommend you readthis if you can read it in its original German – I’m not gatekeeping, it’s justthat so much of its brilliance relies on in-depth knowledge about German culture,history and language and it’s inevitably gonna lose that in translation. It’sone of my absolute favorite books ever and it pains me I can’t share this withmy English-speaking friends :/

YA

The Knife of Never Letting Go (Chaos Walking Book 1) by Patrick Ness. It’shands down the coolest YA book I have ever read and it doesn’t even… feel likeYA at all, more like sci-fi? It could just as easily have gone in the “experimental”category and I don’t wanna give too much away but… the typeface of this book ispart of its charm? Different characters have different fonts and shit? Definitelyread a physical copy of this. Also, the narrator is illiterate so he writeswords by sounding them out – and I know that sounds like that would bedistracting but trust me it’s fantastic??? Please please PLEASE give this atry.

The Watchmaker of Filigree Street by Natasha Pulley. Y’all want a good queerstory that’s not romance-heavy but instead has intricate worldbuilding and really cool magic? Pleaseread this, you will not be disappointed. This is a more “adult” version of YoungAdult Fiction and I absolutely love it.

A Darker Shade of Magic by V.E. Schwab. Is this fantasy, actually? Probably. Does it haveissues? Yes. Is it still a very fun ride with a cool magic/power system? HELLYES. Also the characters are a bit older, which works very well. It’s like YAafter you’ve kind of outgrown YA.

Murder/Mystery

The Strings of Murder (& sequels in the “Frey & McGray” series) by Oscar de Muriel –listen, the main character is a little SHIT and that’s absolutely fine? Themysteries are kind of convoluted but not in a distracting way, it’s just a funseries with fun characters that I really enjoyed!

The Seven Dials Mystery by Agatha Christie (and honestly pretty much everything she has everwritten) – I have nothing to say about Agatha Christie that has not been saidbefore :’D

Phantom bySusan Kay. Now this is kind of also a drama and it’s been a while since I’veread it so idk how well it fits into the murder/mystery category but it’s aboutthe Phantom of the Opera before he became the actual Phantom (or rather, thepath to how he became the Phantom), and I have endless love for this verydramatic and mysterious and misunderstood character so… yeah :D

Collections of Short Stories

Topics About Which I Know Nothing by Patrick Ness. Yes, this is the author of “ChaosWalking” (see above), and this is a collection of a VAST variety of shortstories he has written, all of which are insanely creative and so, so fun??This man has an insane imagination and I love it, instant recommendation toanyone honestly.

Dear Life byAlice Munro – another one that I read a while ago and don’t remember that muchabout, but I remember absolutely loving this book, and that it’s one of thebooks that made me want to read more short story collections :D

The Refugeesby Viet Thanh Nguyen – an interesting bit of perspective, this book centersaround different characters who are Vietnamese or of Vietnamese descent in theUnited States. I loved how eye-opening it was tbh?? I love reading books byauthors from cultures vastly different from my own and this was wonderful.

Poetry/Experimental

Milk and Honey / The Sun and Her Flowers by Rupi Kaur – two collections of very personaland touching modern formless poetry that honestly blew me away. I’m not a bigfan of classic poetry, or poetry in general, but these two books are justincredible.

Good morning, Good night by Lin-Manuel Miranda – a collection of Lin’s “good morning”/ “goodnight” tweets that, idk, give me hope for humanity? Ideal for perusing if youneed cheering up and just an all-round wholesome book to own.

Ella Minnow Pea by Mark Dunn – a “novel without letters” I wouldn’t know where to placeexcept under “experimental” because its premise is basically… an island thatslowly bans more and more letters from everyday use? It’s told in the form ofletters between the characters and it’s just… such a FEAT of writing, the waythe author forces his characters (and himself) to get by with fewer and fewerletters of the alphabet? Fascinating, from a writer’s perspective, and anabsolute recommendation!!!

Sleeping Giants (Book 1 of the Themis Files) by Sylvain Neuvel. This is a sci-fi book,but it’s under “experimental” because, well – it’s told through interviews. Iwas a little confused/put off in the beginning by this style, but the jaw-droppingstory pulled me in and hooked me. It’s a sci-fi EPIC… don’t get too attached toanyone because the apocalypse is coming for them all - and you’ll be at theedge of your goddamn seat. This is a fantastic series.

Drama

The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini. Honestly, anything by Khaled Hosseini, unsurpassedauthor of dramas that will rip your heart to shreds, and you’ll never be thesame after reading them.

Everything I never told you by Celeste Ng. This is one of those books that will never leave you afteryou’ve read it. It starts with “Lydia is dead. But they don’t know this yet.” –unravelling the mystery and consequences of the death of a Chinese-Americanfamily’s teenage daughter in gut-wrenching detail. A family story that willleave you sobbing on the floor but also filled with such profound hope forhumanity – I don’t even know. This book eviscerated me.

Homegoing byYaa Gyasi – the story of two sisters, one a slave and the other a slave-owner’swife, and their descendants. A family history of choices and consequence thatis… raw and personal and a very, very important book.

Home Fire byKamila Shamsie. The story of a British-Pakistani family – more specifically,the story of three children whose father was a terrorist. I am weak for familystories, and this one is politically charged and relevant and gut-wrenching aswell.

Novels/Fiction

The Hours byMichael Cunningham. The first book I read in a stream-of-consciousness style,and I still really enjoy the plot of it, too: The story follows three women;Virginia Woolf writing a novel in the 1920s, a woman reading this novel in the40s, and a woman basically living the plot of this novel in the 90s. It’sfascinating, really? I highly recommend it.

The History of Bees by Maja Lunde. Another story told in three time periods – a man whoinvents a new type of beehive for beekeepers in the 1800s, a beekeeper whosebees are dying in approximately present day, and a woman 100 years in thefuture who pollinates plants by hand because all the bees have vanished. It’s…fascinating, again, and a really good story. I also feel like it was quiteeducational? I enjoyed it a lot.

Small Great Things by Jodi Picoult. Technically this is a drama too (but shh) – it followsa black delivery nurse who is charged with a serious crime after an incidentinvolving the baby of a White Supremacist couple. It’s an explosive topic butit’s handled with a lot of nuance? Reading this book will frustrate you greatly,but I think it’s… idk, important? It shook me.

Eyrie by TimWinton. I have never seen depression portrayed more accurately than in thisbook. I was highlighting passages on almost every page – also the style ispretty cool? Snappy? Sharp? I’m not good at describing it but… yeah this leftan impact.

Non-Fiction (listen I knowthese are all by youtubers but hear me out)

So Much I want to Tell You by Anna Akana – letters written by Anna to her sister, who committedsuicide when she was 13. It’s raw and personal and important, stories aboutpersonal growth and lessons learned, about grief and regret and moving on. Irecommend this 100%.

Secrets For The Mad by Dodie Clark. A collection of charming stories and anecdotes and songlyrics and doodles – a book that reads like what watching dodie’s music videos andvlogs feels like. Safe and soft and personal. I love this.

Doing It byHannah Witton – a book about sex education that honestly everyone should read.Hannah blazes through taboos like they’re nothing more than hot air – as theyshould be. (Also, watch her videos.)

Bonus

The Alchemist by Paolo Coelho. I don’t even know what category to put this in? It reads like a fable and it is just... so beautiful and enchanting. Please read it, you will not be disappointed. It’s a story of chasing your dreams and self-discovery and it’s... just wonderful.

-

Did I make this entire listas a means of procrastination? Yes. Am I sorry? No.

Listen I have been wantingto blog about books for the LONGEST TIME but I never took the time to because…idk, I am not involved with the book reviewer community on any platform andhonestly I’m intimidated? But I do have a lot of Thoughts so if you’ve read anyof these and want to yell about them with/at me please dm me??? Or send me anask if you want to hear more detailed opinions about any of these from me????

…yeah. Thank you for this question,man. I love books.

Send me “top 5″ of anything and I’ll respond with my favorites!!!

#French speaks #books #book recs #rec #answered #ask me stuff

[soul-music-is-life]

I'm kind of with you on the lackluster Pilot episode of "The Perfectionists". I don't know whether or not I'm into it either. And not because of Emison (I'm more of an Emaya fan myself). I just thought it was cheesy and boring. I don't know if I should keep watching. What about you?

I have actually gotten several asks about whether I plan tokeep watching and why/why not. So I’m going to answer it here and just referback to it if it keeps coming up.

I don’t mind the asks at all. I love conversing, but because of the volume of asks about thisparticular opinion this is another long driveling post, and I’m sorry. You can mute my ass if you’re sick of me. I get it.

First of all OP, thank you for not ripping into me about notliking it. Also, Emaya had my heart. I loved them, too. Maya deserved better.

Second, this is a full-scale look at the show from a critic’svantage point. I watched the first episode twice because I thought maybe I hadn’tgiven it a fair shake the first time because I was in a weird mood. But even onthe second viewing I found a lot more that I disliked than I liked. Lots ofpeople are going to disagree, and that’s fine. Just don’t @ me. I’m legit notlooking for that. I’m just a girl (cue NottingHill music) standing in front her ask inbox asking those askers to love her.

Will I keep watching? I doubt it. Given that it only got a10-episode order and The Pilot wasn’t that interesting to me, I don’t see myselfsitting through it for 9 more episodes. My reasoning is two-tiered. Part of itis disinterest and the other part is the creative aspect of it in the media. Saddleup for my “truths” (I can’t remember who said that. Marlene maybe). I gave it afew days and considered it, and what I ended up with was this:

1) I’m just not into it. For the same reasons you (OP) stated.But I’ll also add that for me…it was predictable. I called the twists longbefore they happened. If I’m already doing that in The Pilot I can guarantee I’dbe doing that as the show went on. I’m like 93% sure I know exactly how it’sgoing to end this season. I tend to do that to myself. Being a writer suckssometimes. Because you see the way things are going to go from the beginning. You just have to decide if you want to go on the journey anyway.

2) While the characters were likable (I was surprised by howmuch I liked Ava), they are a bit one-sided and kind of bland (except I foundNolan’s duality extremely intriguing). There is the argument that can be madehere that they will grow, and I do agree with that. But when I watch a show’sPilot I need to care about at least one character to see what’s going to happenand where they are going to go (In PLL it was Em/Aria for me). None of the characters in TP did that for me (noteven Mona and Alison, which surprised me, because I’ve been super-hype for thisshow not only for them, but for the newbies, too).  

3) The plot (so far) just feels like a rehash of everysingle YA mystery novel/TV show that is hot right now. And I am aware that thisis based loosely on exactly that (Sara’s series), but I think maybe I’ve justbecome desensitized to the same cheesy soap-opera-y murder mystery plots. Or perhaps I’m just desensitized to this particular kind of storytelling. It doesn’tfeel new and different to me and it was very strangely paced with too muchgoing on and not enough time to care about it. It just felt disjointed. Everythingabout the first episode just fell flat for me.

4) And lastly, yes, I’d say there is a tiny part of me…likemaybe…6% that doesn’t want to watch because I’m not about that off-screenEmison drama. I knew it was going to happen and I’m not mad about them beingsplit. I’m disappointed (hears “that’sjust ‘mom speak’ for mad!” echoing somewhere) that the marketing team isusing it for ratings. When you have decent writing you don’t need to play games like that to try andget viewers. It would be one thing to be decisive about what happened toEmily/Alison (Split them. Don’t split them. I don’t care. Just make a fuckingdecision because you’re creating a war between fans and you know it). It’sanother thing entirely to draw it out because you need people to watch and talkabout it.

I am also particularly bothered by hearing the excuse (several times by MK) that “Shay was busy”because Marlene literally planned the spin-off in season 6 (confirmed by bothher and Sasha). It. Was. Planned. I say this as a critic and not an Emison fan: Everything about the way they’ve tried to use Emison to generate buzz was underhanded. And saying shit like that opens the door for people to hate on Shay, and that’s really not cool.

Personally, I think it speaks volumes that the producers felt the need to addthe off-screen drama on top of the really decent plot they already had. Theycould have kept it unproblematic with simple writing choices and less inflammatorycommentary. They could have left the PLL drama in the PLL-verse and given thespotlight to the new drama. I don’tagree with creating old off-screen drama with zero chance of satisfactoryresolution all in the name of ratings. I hate marketing shit like that. It’s acheap amateur tactic and it turns me off.

I think the show could have been something special had theynot marketed it as PLL. But they did, so of course there was a certainexpectation. And of course there is some backlash. Because there are these twoworlds that have nothing to do with each other and so far I don’t feel likethey’ve blended it together well. For me, it was like watching PLL, but with less magic and less chemistry. If I had to describe it I’d say it feels alot like a recipe where you’re just throwing a bunch of ingredients into a bowlwith no idea what you’re making and you’re just hoping it’ll be edible by theend. Rather than focusing on the new universe the marketing team chose to focuson Ali/Mona’s new world and the drama that comes with them. And to me that almost says they don’t have faith that TPwould have been able to stand on its own without the PLL universe. Part of methinks I’d be more interested if this had been a completely fresh start. I wasactually more compelled by the newbies than I was Alison/Mona (though I adorethem, too).

That being said, I really wish the best for the cast/crew. I’llcontinue to watch the behind the scenes games/cast antics. I’ve been a fan ofSasha since I discovered PLL (everything about her seems very sweet and genuine andjust positive all around). And Janel as Mona was one of my favorite castingchoices of all time. In fact, I think my very first PLL post here was praisefor Janel. I’ve been following Sydney since she was a smol lil bean on theDisney Channel (and loved her in Tia’s Mowry’s show “Instant Mom”). Sofia seemslike a sweet girl, and I have enjoyed her other work. And Eli honestly justseems like he’d be a cool dude to kick back and have a drink with (is he evenold enough to drink? Jesus, they’re all babies). I love them all. In fact, I’veenjoyed the fun behind the scenes stuff more than I enjoyed the show. I’dwatch a reality show of them all day. That’s where I’ll get my fill. Watching them being goofy.

Final verdict: No, the show will not be getting my views. I’llprobably just watch the absurdity of Riverdale instead. Cheryl is fucking wild,y’all. And I’m kind of living for mean-dark-snarky Betty. And Sweet Pea is like…myfavorite character ever. My dumb asshole child.

As far as whether or not youshould watch it, I have no idea. I have a lot of people asking me my opinion onthat (which, I’m like the worstperson to ask, please don’t give me that responsibility. I don’t even likebeing responsible in the real world. I literally had a cookie and Cocoa Puffsfor dinner). I will say that if you’re only watching for Emison then I’d changethe channel. Because guaranteed it’s just going to make you rage. You’re not going to get anything out of it. Fill yourevenings with something more pleasant and positive for you.

And be nice to others on social media. At the end of the day, it’s only a show. You like it or you don’t.

#The Perfectionists #PLL #Pretty Little Liars #Emison asks

[onceuponamirror]

11 questions game

tagged by @raptorlily, who prepared 11 questions for her tag-ees:

1. The core four + Kevin and Cheryl are attending a literary character party. What costume does each of them wear? Bonus: What costumes are the Southside Serpent characters wearing?

OH BOY. well, betty is elizabeth bennett. her instinct is obviously be nancy drew, but then decides she wants to play dress up a little bit. she tries valiantly to get jughead into a darcy couples costume, but his instinct is to just be sal paradise because he won’t have to buy anything for the costume. 

betty tells him that if she’s not going to be nancy, he should go outside the box too. he then decides on dressing like the titular mummy from jane loudon’s the mummy! (he’s still a weirdo, remember)

veronica goes as daisy buchanan if not purely for the extravagant opportunity to dress like a flapper, archie comes as jim hawkins from treasure island, cheryl bucks expectation and attends as a female robin hood (she already loves archery), and kevin is absolutely sherlock holmes. he’d look so natural in a trenchcoat!

2. What extracurricular activities are Reggie, Ethel, Fangs, Midge, Toni and Sweetpea involved in?

besides sports, reggie’s extracurricular activity is definitely selling ground up oregano to middle schoolers and telling them it’s weed. 

ethel is canonically a drama geek and that’s valid, but she’s also probably in band. i’m gonna go with....flutist. 

fangs is also canonically a drama geek and a regular geek (less we not forget jughead used a larping club to lure fangs out of a self-imposed suspension) so i honestly am just waiting for him and kev to start up their dungeons and dragons club. (wow they are perfect for each other tho??? a dorkier bughead)

midge (RIP) was probably into 4-H bc i can’t get the concept of��“klump farms” out of my head. she seemed like a genuinely sweet person who also was a regular teenager and was a cheerleader and probably volunteered at hospitals too idk 

toni wanted to get laid so bad she became a cheerleader. or, ok, seriously i mean my headcanon is like, it’s bring it on, where toni was into gymnastics and dance in a v serious way but southside didn’t offer any curriculars that would allow her to do that, and she couldn’t afford gymnastics herself. turns out the closest thing riverdale has is cheerleading, which’ll do. 

sweet pea is probably the lowkey nerdiest of them all. i was joking earlier that he’s probably secretly into anime, but more seriously: feel like he’d go for basketball officially and also probably has an interest in engineering. i mean, that interest began with pipe bombs, but. yanno. ya dreams gotta start somewhere!!!

3. Give me three of your favourite headcanons for Reggie

had a crush on betty until high school

does his dumbest shit for his dad’s attention, painfully unsubtle about it

is cripplingly afraid of being alone, which is why he surrounds himself by teammates at all times and/or can’t get past the pack mentality. has difficulty being vulnerable in spite of all that, can’t be honest with himself and/or with others. 

4. It’s Saturday night and the core four are all hanging out by themselves at home. What is each of them up to?

betty is listening to the memory palace podcast while laying on her bed, feet crossed up in the air, doing her homework. cleaned her room earlier. wants to call polly. she doesn’t. stays up till two am for no reason other than her room is warm and full of golden light and it’s the only time the house is quiet. plugged back in her old nightlight, half out of spite after polly nearly threw it out, half genuinely. sometimes she thinks she’s still afraid of the dark. the irony isn’t lost on her. 

jughead is working on his novel, american crime story is playing on the TV in the background, a bag of popcorn slowly rotating in the microwave. the trailer is empty and he chooses to think his dad is at work. emails his sister. he doesn’t remember when, but they’ve stopped talking about their mom. his tattoo itches. toni told him not to scratch at it. 

veronica is drinking chamomile tea on a tray, scrolling through pinterest and making a european vacation mood board for the post-graduation trip she’d like to take with her friends. she wants to surprise them with it, all-expenses paid. she resists the urge to book flights years in advance. browses the barney’s website. doesn’t know why she gets such a thrill from online shopping. isn’t sure why she can’t stop. 

archie is in the garage, his fingers strumming aimlessly over the strings of his guitar. wonders why his mother can’t be a lawyer here in riverdale. isn’t sure if music was ever his own, or something he thought he should want, because he didn’t want to work construction. or worse, because a woman found it attractive. brought his history textbook out with the intention to study. doesn’t. practices wonderwall, even though jughead laughs whenever the song comes upon. 

5. What’s your headcanon for Jughead’s hat? Why does he wear it? What’s the origin story?

his mom made it when he was a kid, and growing up in threadbare clothes donated down the line of serpents or thrift store finds, it was the one thing that was truly his---made for him. with love. 

being scrawny and quiet and outgrowing his pants too fast to replace them already set him apart. might as well let the hat seal the deal. 

6. What is your Riverdale guilty pleasure ship? One that you don’t necessarily ship in canon but wouldn’t mind reading fanfiction for?

don’t think i have one, honestly? 

7. Can Chuck be redeemed in your eyes? Any caveats or things that would need to happen to make this count?

yeah, it’s really interesting answer this question post 2x18, but---yes, i definitely think chuck can be redeemed. i never wanted him to be a villain in the first place, for so, so many reasons. 

i mean, comics!chuck was a deliberate bucking of specific stereotypes that riverdale slid right back into without seeming to think about what it was they were saying by doing that. (related readings: x) and then the way they did it---ack. 

outside of the vacuum of comics vs. show, i think that where we’re at culturally, we’re really asking men to unlearn their toxic masculinity. especially of adolescents who are still growing and changing---and what chuck did was certainly part of the vacuum of male privilege/toxic masculinity, but he faced consequences  for that, and then he acknowledged it. actively has announced he wants to change, and i genuinely believe it at this point. 

and while i wish chuck wasn’t the character they’re doing this with in the first place, “cancelled culture” can be really frustrating because it’s way too binary. it undermines the growth and self-crit we want people to be doing. 

obviously, it doesn’t apply unilaterally, some people are abusive or cruel or malicious to the point where they lose their ability to profit off of it, and rightfully so---but with a character like chuck, whose main crime appeared to just be slut shaming, i actually appreciate a narrative where a male character owns up to how that was bad, why it was wrong, and how they’re going to change. 

8. What is a storyline you’d like to see most explored on the show?

just---more familial dynamics. i cannot wait for gladys and JB, i think that’s going to be so meaty and tragic and emotional in the right ways. i want more of polly and betty’s relationship, and/or how betty feels watching her sister run away constantly, or just their dynamic in general. more of archie and fred navigating dreams vs. reality. i kinda don’t love veronica’s parents tho, and i’m not sure where they could take that in a way that i enjoy. 

9. What is your favourite Riverdale fanfic trope or cliché?

pining, man. just. pining. 

10. What is existing scene or storyline would you rewrite to better suit your tastes?

HAH. how much time do we have 

BONUS:  Archie starts a band. He settles on ‘The Archies’ but what were some of the other suggestions for the band name? Name three songs that show up on their debut album.

jughead’s suggestion is: red drum, red drum and he thinks it’s hilarious

three songs: midnight ride, smoking gun, and can’t fly

my 11 questions for my taggees 

1. which twist did you least see coming? genuinely. 

2. we all know riverdale loves hopscotching through genre elements (true crime, musical, grease, etc), and sometimes it’s too much, but which has been your favorite? what other ones would you like to see from the show?

3. riverdale does dirty on its secondary characters. what storylines would you give to reggie, kevin, josie, etc? or, what would you like to see for them in s3? anything you thought the show really fumbled? did right?

4. what are your backstory headcanons for sweet pea, fangs, and toni?

5. what’s your theory on the old riverdale riots?

6. it’s the ten year high school reunion. where did everyone go to college? (core four + the secondary pals) what’s your headcanon for their future careers? who’s still together? who wishes they were still together? who hooks up unexpectedly in a storage closet? 

7. what’s a storyline you just didn’t buy this season?

8. any headcanons for the riverparents? like, how they grew up, who they were in high school, why they went the directions they did?

9. what’s one trope that you’d wish the show would do? or something you wish you saw more in fic?

10. thoughts on reggie? will he ever be fleshed out? will it make him more of a villain, or less of one?

11. if you could have anything happen in s3, what would it be?

and i tag @village-skeptic @stillscape @sylwrites @lessoleilscouchants @myrmidonofmelodrama @heartunsettledsoul @raptorlily (tagging back, bc i want your answers on these too!) @theatreofexpression​ @imreallyloveleee​ 

or anyone who wants to answer!!! just tag me, i wanna see yer answers. these games are fun 

#tag games #chuck clayton #reggie mantle

[paraclete0407]

Everywhere I go I see these ‘morning’ novels about ‘getting life right the first time through.’  All these Asian girls I dated year after year and they expect / demand me to be totally established and take all their abuse - I will not complain more than that - when what I’ve wanted for a long time is literally ‘to live like an immigrant in one’s own country.’  All the people I admire seemingly married young such as the current Korean president and former UN Secretary General.  

I keep thinking, ‘That ultra-miraculous Hail Mary 80K-or-so YA novel that will get me out of here and also annihilate all the evil YA novels that I hate and want to expurgate from BN, the libraries etc.’  The wolf-child teenage-assassin good-to-be-gay ultra-sensualize-Asian-girls good-to-get-raped good-to-be-anorexic good-to-hate good-to-be-cynical etc.

I tried to support ‘Finding My Voice’ author Marie Ok Myung Lee on Twitter b/c I saw ‘Finding My Voice’ at BN and went, ‘OMG they took Kim Minju’s face and it’s right there.’  I lived in KR; I don’t mistake faces; YA is ripping K-pop left and right but Minju’s a real person with a life, had panic-attacks, needed exogenous O2 from trying to ‘honor’ her fans.  I wrote Minju ‘greentext fics’ talking about chivalry on 4chan but instead of motivating NEET’s to get a life or at least value and honor women it had people talking about rape, and various techniques of what might be called slave-breaking or the ways in which slavers and human traffickers so damage their human chattel as to render them unlikely to escape.  Jordan Peterson on Twitter is defending 4chan for its truthyness I guess (despite JBP’s having dreams of Christ and the kings of this Earth bowing down after trying to smash each other), and also pointlessly dueling / debating actual rape- and trafficking-victim Yeonmi Park, a North Korean escapee, due to the fact that JBP is ultra-rich and invested in his brand / identity and probably delaying Christianity as long as possible.  Marie Lee also got embroiled in a pretty pointless debate with a smart but mercenary Tory Toffish British professor called Dave Tizzard over precisely how much incendiary was dropped on to North Korean people and they’re still battling each other over God-knows-what.  My parents also recently tried to duel me to the death over my interest in supporting Liberty in North Korea; about which my Dad said, ‘If you try to enter North Korea I will cut you off.’  I’m a communist defector for being anti-communist because this is 2021 in Babylon and reality is unreality.  I’m sorry if I sound like Ben Shapiro but honestly facts and those ho handle them are sometimes more important to the art / science caring than narratives, the ashes of experience, personality, etc.  People such as Joe Biden also appear to oppose food-relief to North Korea on the grounds that it will prop up the regime and, say, if we feed North Koreans they might have excess energy and actually develop WMD’s and non-conventional capabilities that could threaten the US; an eventuality we prevented in the past by making sure NK starved in the 1990s and also by disarming NK’s WMD operation in Iraq in 2003.

All jokes aside NK policy strikes me as incredibly mentally ill and by that I mean spiritually depraved (I really think so), racist, genocidal / annhilationist, desiring to erase both souls / individuals and history, confused, scared.  IDK if I am allowed to even say that but I have a ‘black swan’ theory of history / WW3 in which some of the formerly colonized nations, such as NK and SRV (Socialist Republic of Vietnam), basically take over the world using special forces because in a way they deserve it and also because they know what it’s like to be on the receiving end of both malevolent colonial power and pseudo-benevolent or well-meaning-but-stupid-and-cowardly-and-non-committed paternal colonialism / imperialism.  It could appear outlandish but if you study certain battles in history you find there are critical factors in terms of information, will, ‘moral factor,’ technology, the Hand of God.  

I ultimately believe many of us on the Earth will have new neighbors very soon and we must honor them with worthy offerings, both out of justice and out of love for their souls (a-ga-pe, caritas / Charity).  During the pandemic I repeatedly read Chancellor / Dr. / Pastor John Piper’s ‘Coronavirus and Christ’ as well as Francis Chan’s ‘Forgotten God’ about the Holy Spirit and how to invite(?) His counsel, comfort, wisdom, orders.  

To anyone and everyone who might be reading this someday I also recommend highly Catherine Cho’s ‘Inferno’ which is about post-partum psychosis, mental healthcare in the United States, motherhood, demons, all of which are factors currently of critical importance to a lot of us.  I had written a poem for Literary Shanghai which I think was accepted but which I then rescinded about ‘Inferno’ describing my own experiences with mental healthcare and terror of Hell and the Spirit.  I had also spoken of a ‘Requiem’ which is something the pre-eminent English-language professor of the Korean War once called for though the essence of what might have happened during that conflict as well as what could happen again today is quite frankly literally a ‘Dies Irae,’ not the peaceful or nice part of the traditional requiem.  I had actually wanted to write Korean War novels before I realized how mercenary this is about an operation codenamed Ripper under Gen. Ridgway, the part of the war that involved bullets as much as heavy bombers or whatever, huge masses of Chinese troops, situations of semi-indiscriminate firing into masses of Asians including refugees, not to mention numerous hapless boy-soldiers from China.  All this stuff appears to be clawing its way out of the ground now - the Korean government recently awarded an American colonel in his 90′s for a certain unspecified action - but it’s 3:50 AM, billions born and unborn are at stake in other places, lands of miracle and menace, such as particularly Somalia with a birthrate that resembles that of the Republic of Korea prior to contraception etc., and I have personal problems to target and numerous ownership-issues when it comes to what is truly meant for me to do in the remains of my day(s).  

It also appears that a large coterie / clique / posse of persons around here are obsessed with me magically forcing them to respect, cherish, etc. me which puts me in mind of my favorite K-pop song - maybe the only one I ought to care about anymore - (Ms. / Leader) Kim Taeyeon’s ‘Make Me Love You,’ which however was also released on the same day as a super-massive democidal chemical attack in Syria.  

A while back I reflected somewhat - maybe not enough - on the idea of ‘counter-imperialism,’ by which I don’t mean Jean Paul Sartre or Mao or the Black Panthers, but using power, influence, etc. to circumscribe or delimit the excess ambitions of people who think they have the right idea but have lost their right minds or don’t really understand or care.  At one point I thought wishfully, ‘America is like a counter-empire,’ but IDK if I was really thinking of America b/c to be a counter-empire by my definition you need control and reason and wisdom and SME (subject matter expertise), not just wishes.  

I’m not sure any liberal democracy today has all these though my optimistic side looks to the current ROK president, Twitter moonriver365, who appears to be playing an almost impossible hand with literally every other country, flesh and spirit.  I bought this leader’s autobiography but my Korean cuts in and out of comprehension.  IDK if I’m too open-minded or not open-minded enough; I have my affections and I guess limerences (liking) as well.  I don’t despise the current ruler of Russia either for he has been trying to do good things for a nation that paid a nearly incomprehensible price in WW2 (Great Patriotic War), and which was mocked and despised for no good reason by a smug West, which perhaps sunk into unworthiness of itself, after the first Cold War.  

I remember looking at a picture the Moscow GPW memorial obelisk and being awed to tears - bodies and souls ascending into Heaven or hurled into Hell.  Straight up, straight down.  St. George and the dragon.  ‘They are attacking again; are they mortal?’  

However, I came to view this memorial partly whilst researching a fanciful Millennial anti-establishment curse-the-system-and-die novel about the mass-drowning of some 300 South Korean high school students in 2014.

I also made an effort to cultivate concern for children in the Midwest but somehow became sidetracked again just thinking about world events, the fact that every race is out to get every other race, these golden-haired Caucasian girls are probably taken to be ‘Little Women’ knockoffs or Henry James throwbacks or some Reddit category that can be easily demonized by Maoist flaks, BLM, anyone looking to score points or reduce the other in order to magnify the self and/or its tribal / identity-politics interests.  

Over recent months I considered a lot - maybe still not enough - the categories or qualities of purpose; purity; and also presence.