#also: i looooooove when he does what he did in the last one

[lightlycareless]

chapter 30 has me CLIMBING the WALLS

the visceral uncomfortableness of a dead silent car ride with these two,,,, i can not even begin to imagine it. the tension in there was so heavy and so dense i’m shocked it didnt make a black hole

first thought when naoya took a suddenly different turn on the street was “oh so we’re getting murdered in an alleyway??? left to die??” he does not come off with good vibes for himself at ALL. luckily its just for more doctors appointments. deeply sorry to every individual that had to be around these twos painfully obvious rift

EVERYTIME NAOYA TRIED TO TALK TO HER… i know hes done nothing to properly redeem himself but ohmygod i can feel the awkward pains. kudos to him for not just like bursting into tears in the elevator when she turned away. i would’ve been a mess.

i’m gonna THROTTLE this doctor (also y/n girl i get the frustration but what did you WANT him to SAY for you on the cheating question,,, if he speaks over you to answer i know you aren’t going to like that either he can NOT win this one,,,) - and also the one time naoya pulls himself together to assist by showing the ultrasound that gets just shot down as well. we are on a losing battle. naoya stans stay losing 😔

incredible balls to try for the “wanna get something to eat?” a SECOND time. that play failed MISERABLY last time and its already been a string of horrible events today but lets GO king!!🗣️💯🔥give us nothing!! 🔥🔥❗️💯

concluding- naoya has been exuding CRITICAL levels of shaking chihuahua and cringefail energy ft. y/n desperately trying to Hold It Together. exquisite chapter. looking forward to the next as always

AUGHAUAH I ALREADY SENT A CHAPTER 30 ASK BUT I REREAD IT THIS MORNING N WENT BACK OVER THE “test her condition” PART- not sure how i left this outta the last one that had me so fried

but am i hallucinating or is naoya… also hesitant about that? i know that its just two words “Naoya swallows” but it SOUNDS like he’s got just. the barest hint. the barest idea that perhaps,,, maybe,, that would be a bad thing to do. now if he knows the WHY of why it would be bad is a completely different question, but it at least reads as if he faintly understands he should NOT do that again.

(feel free to just like. screenshot this and throw it in w the bigger one lmaoo i still can’t believe i left this out its huge)

Hello!!!!

HAHAHAH I’m glad you’re suffering, I mean, enjoying the latest update 😊 Also, don't worry about the asks hehe you can send in as many as you want! I looooooove reading and answering them 🥺❤

Now, Imagine if someone decided to accompany them? I don’t know, like Ranta. I think the poor boy would’ve been like “omg… Naoya really has no chance” lol OR WORSE, NAOAKI FOR SURE Y/N WOULD’VE IGNORED NAOYA EVER MORE HAHAHA

“Y/N” Naoya calls “Is there something you’d like to—”

“Naoaki, look! There’s snow on the mountains! No wonder it’s so cold, guess we'll need more than a few blankets tonight”

Naoaki: 😳

Naoya cries, mind going on and on about what did Y/N mean with “we’ll” before remembering the night he saw him leave her chambers.

And I’m pretty sure that’s what Y/N thought too when they headed somewhere else lol she has long accepted that nothing good will come from him (but she didn’t expect it to happen so soon!!! She feared Hitomi and Haruko were going to be like GODDAMN IT I TOLD YOU TO NOT GO. Also, wasn't Naobito in charge of that!!?!?!) but thank God it was just him doing (1) of his many commitments towards Y/N, which considering whom they came from, mean nothing.

I’d hate to be the person attending them :s luckily… we’ll have something of that perspective next chapter (if I don’t discard it 🤭)

The worst part of Naoya’s continuous failing attempts would definitely have to be the way Y/N just turned away hahahah I was like DAMN girl, even if she was somewhat afraid of doing anything because of his outburst she really did that. And Naoya took it lmao straight to the heart. Good.

As for Naoya crying… heh. 😊 I just realized we haven’t seen him do that… interesting, I think you might like that one chapter.

The whole doctor thing was just awful. He was really out there, jabbing at anyone he could 😳 I’m surprised he didn’t kick it up a notch and slander Toji too. Though I think Naobito was like “No, Naoya is sensitive and he might actually kill you so chill, I still have use for you” lol

I’ll still defend Y/N by saying she hasn’t cheated on Naoya but…. I mean, the emotional department… that’s long gone hahahahahahahahahahhahahaahhahahaha Still, wtf is this man going over and over about that particular topic? Like, we get it. You want to know. Ok, sure, maybe she’s gotten something but these two for sure haven’t so NEXT. Shouldn't we be talking about Naoya in that sense???

As for the ultrasound part, I actually was like “huh, impressive Naoya decided to actually stand up and do something” maybe to get his money’s worth, or probably to reveal “WHAT THE HELL DO THESE THINGS MEAN????? IS THERE A BABY THERE OR NOT” get outta here... and how he reacted to the rest of the procedures I was just like yep, there he is... usual Naoya.

This man is grasping at straws at this point, inviting her out to eat was the evidence of that lol. If Y/N was a bit more… assertive and fearless, she would’ve been like “are you serious right now? You want me to get sentenced to death again? Sir, I only have one life, GOODBYE”

As for the “test her condition”… it’s the doctor instigating Y/N and Naoya again with Naoaki lol. I don’t know what this man is thinking, seriously. Probably that Y/N was abstaining to do the deed in a more pleasurable way 🤮and the way he was disappointed that there was no heartbeat or a fetus in there wtf lol.

Naoya is hesitant because of Naoaki more than anything, as well as the fact that he can’t get near Y/N at all, his father’s conditions for her survival looming in the back of his mind.

If it helps to give some peace of mind, Naoya does not have it in him to force himself on Y/N again, at least… not now. Because he knows if he crosses that line again, she’ll definitely run towards Naoaki and never leave, and his marriage is DONE. GONE. (can’t be a good person just cause, eh??)

Both characters are on a really tight spot, but I guess in an emotional distress Naoya is in the worse position as of right now. (Y/N is used to it in a way, while he’s barely comprehending what’s going on around him, he's got a whoooole world of turmoil to comprehend, and more to come lmao)

But as you said, we're out here cheering for Naoya lmao!!! Indeed, go give us nothing 😂😂 And the way you described Naoya as a chihuahua... lmao, couldn't be more accurate.

I'm so glad you like this chapter!! It gets me excited for the rest which I cannot wait to show :> !!!!!

Once again, thank you so much for tuning in for another update ❤ also, if there's more things you wish to know or just share my askbox is always open 🤭I looooooooove reading your comments ngl 😭 it often provides me perspectives I fail to see, thank you so much 🥺❤

I hope you have a wonderful week, take care, and hope to see you soon!!!

#ask #ask series: first it hurts— #naoya zenin #naoya zen'in #naoya x reader #naoya zenin x reader #naoya zenin x your #jjk naoya #naoya zen'in x reader

[highly-opinionated-ramblings]

"Bruce, my man," Oliver said loudly as he entered the Watchtower's cafeteria, "today would be a good day to delete your social media apps for a little while. Take a break, come back in a few months or so."

Bruce sighed. "What is it now?"

"Nnnnnnothing. Don't worry about it."

"Really," Barry added, seeing that Bruce was unconvinced, "it's nothing important. Just some random person stirring up drama."

"Hang on, you don't have a guy who handles that stuff for you, do you?" Hal asked. "Like a secretary, or something?"

"Wayne Enterprises has a social media team. Personally, I have Tim, who makes it his business to intervene on my behalf more often than not."

"Well, tell him to delete his socials for a while, too."

"It's just drama, right? Nothing either of us haven't seen before, I'm sure."

"Uhhh," Barry said, exchanging a nervous glance with Oliver, "well, this one's going kinda viral. Any kind of statement on your part would probably make it worse rather than better."

"Barry, I promise, I've been 'viral' lots of times in my life. You're probably worrying too much."

"Look, I'll tell you if you want to know," Oliver said. "I'll do it. Are you really sure you want to know? Are you really, really-"

"Oliver."

"Alright, fine. Have it your way. Earlier today, somebody posted, and I quote: 'billionaire playboy' is just a nice way of saying that Bruce Wayne is a SLUT."

Bruce snorted. "Is that all?"

"It's going viral," Barry repeated carefully.

"That's fine. It's no big deal."

"No big deal?!" Hal asked incredulously.

"Wayne Enterprises just put out a Transparency of Operations report last week, I was worried it would be something about that."

"Still, the comments.... the comments..."

"Highly entertaining, I'm sure," Bruce rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, they really are." Oliver grinned. "Some great memes in there."

"It's split about half and half between people slut-shaming you, and people saying we shouldn't be slut-shaming anyone."

"My favorite part is that there's a bunch of people defending you who claim to have actually slept with you during the height of your slut era. And they're all making a point to mention how nice you were about the whole thing!"

Oliver threw back his head and positively cackled. Hal laughed, too. Barry attempted valiantly to remain merely concerned, but even he had to bite his lip to stop from laughing. Bruce merely shrugged.

"Well, I like to think I kept it respectful with all my past partners from that era. Never saw any point in not being considerate."

"Yeah, you're a real gentleman."

"There's some men in there, as well, saying the same stuff," Hal said. "Does that count as a big deal?"

"Why would it? I've been publicly out as bisexual for almost three years now."

"You WHAT?!"

"Missed that one, did you? That also went viral for a little bit."

"You were in space when that happened, Hal," Barry said. "Remember that time you were gone for a while, and then as soon as you got back, Lobo was running around causing all that chaos? It was then."

"That's- you should have remembered to tell me about that, Barry! That's a pretty big deal!"

"No, it's really not."

"Shut up, Bruce. What the fuck does it mean to be 'publicly out', anyway? How did that even happen?!"

"Someone approached Wayne Enterprises about sponsoring the Gotham pride parade, and a couple of associated LGBTQ+ focused charities. So we gave them some money, and they invited me to give a speech as part of the event. I thought it would have been inappropriate to do so just as an ally."

By this point, Oliver was bent double, laughing so hard that there were tears in his eyes, and even Barry was snickering at the the look of mixed disbelief and confusion on Hal's face.

"That's... that's... I can't... you're not normal! I need you to recognize that you are not a normal person!"

"Noted."

"I'm sure it was actually inspiring for a lot of Gothamites," Barry said. "They looooooove their Bruce Wayne out there, after all."

"Sure. I'm not ignorant of the influence my standing affords me."

"Well, I still think you should stay out of this one. And Tim, too, definitely don't let him intervene on your behalf here. But it's good to know that it doesn't bother you."

"Yeah, I aspire to have skin as thick as yours. Any tips?"

"Maybe being a slut has something to do with it."

"BRUCE!"

#my writing #DC comics #Batman #fanfiction #sorry for writing more chaotic bisexual Bruce Wayne content #can't promise it won't happen again

[yolo1650]

Animal Crossing One Shot- Ten Star Rating (BobxReader)

Summary: Getting that perfect island turns out to be a lot harder than it looks.

Word Count: 1498

Warnings: No warnings here, it’s basically rated G, just two cute people, being cute together

——————————————————————————

Feeling nothing but a heavy sense of defeat, you closed the doors of the Resident Service building behind you. With the sun still high in the sky, there was still many hours of daylight left, precious hours that could be spend planting, refurnishing, terra-forming.  

But all you could feel was the aching in your legs, clearly overworked by all the running around you did this morning. They couldn’t help but buckle beneath you. Giving in, you sat down at the center of the plaza, face in your palms, as you remembered Isabelle's advice.  

"Let's get more greenery on this island by planting fruit and saplings. When it comes to tree varieties, we should really branch out!"

Your jaw clenched. While Isabelle's corny joke came from a kind-hearted place, it did nothing to cheer you up from your predicament.  

Last time it was too many trees, and too little flowers. Now that I've spent the whole morning planting more flowers, you're telling me there's not enough trees?

At this rate, you many never get your island to a five star rating.  

Then, you heard someone yelling, their voice getting louder as they got closer to you.  

"Heeeeeeeyyyyyyyy!"

You felt Bob's shadow cast over you, giving you momentary relief from the afternoon sun.  

"Hey Bob."

His shadow moved, and with it, his footsteps as its pattering sounds circled around you. Even with your eyes covered, you could still vividly see Bob's wide, carefree smile, and his arms outstretched like an airplane.  

"The island looks great today! On my way here I stopped like, five times to smell all of the pretty flowers! Or was it more like three times? I kind of stopped counting after two, pthhpth."

Taking your face out of your hands, you leaned your cheek against one of your palms and did nothing to mask your exhaustion and disappointment.  

"Still not good enough to get a good island rating though."

Bob stilled. Taking quick glances between you and the Resident Service building, he began to understand.  

"Oh."

After taking a seat next to you, you look over to his uncharacteristically somber face.  

"I'm sorry to hear that."

Great now you messed up his groove. One of the happiest, most carefree villager is sulking because of you. Maybe it was better if you just got up and left, you should have never left your house in the first place.  

But Bob beat you to it. Standing up with what seems to be renewed energy, he ran back to his house. You didn't have to wait long before hearing your name being shouted in the distance, its volume gradually increasing.  When Bob came back his typical ear-to-ear smile was as well. He was also holding onto a medium sized canvas. With outstretched arms, he presented it exclaiming,

"Here! I gotta lil' something for ya!"

After getting up and dusting off your pants, you took the unexpected gift from his hands. Your eyebrows were raised high in astonishment. Pleased at your reaction, Bob shyly looked away while rubbing the back of his neck.  

"But it's probably nothing compared to what you've done for the island so far."

As you examined the painting you weren't sure how to feel about it at first. Anyone back at your hometown would recognize immediately that this gift was clearly not your style. While you preferred romantic style oil paintings, the piece before you had to be best described as the work of a child. Abstract and sloppy, no distinct line art, and distinct brush strokes. That last part was the most peculiar to you. Did he use cotton balls to paint this?

You took a step back and looked at the piece again as a whole. Once you did, you felt a smile creep up on your face. This painting was clearly made with you in mind, as not only were you the subject, but you were surrounded by all of the things you loved on this island. The foreground was adorned with your favorite flowers, the background was the island's serene coast, and you were wearing your favorite outfit.

The colors were the most impressive, in your opinion. They were so spot on that just looking at it alone made you feel like you were right there, hearing the crashing waves. He even got your eye color at just the right shade, and remembered to add your dimples to your smile.  

You found it difficult to contain your excitement.  

"Wow! Bob, this is amazing! And you painted it? I didn't know you liked to paint!"

"Hmmm? Oh yeah, I like to do all sorts of drawing." Lost in thought, he started leaning back and forth between the balls of his feet and his heels. "But I especially looooooove finger painting! It's like ya got super powers 'cause everything you touch changes color!"

You chuckled. Paw prints, that explained the strange brush strokes.  

"How'd you know my favorite spot on the island was the beach?" You asked.

Bob simply shrugged as he replied, "You're just there so often, I sorta figured it was like, your natural habitat or something, pthhpth."

"What about my clothes?"

He looked away briefly before clearing his throat to answer. "I, uh, always thought you looked the prettiest when you wore those." He couldn't help but blush a little. "Just 'cause you always smiled more when you wore those."  

You then felt your own face heat up.  

"A-and what about the flowers? How'd you know these were my favorite?"

"Oh, those? You were always buying those from Lief every time he comes over." His eyes glanced up in thought as he continued.  

"At first I was thinking what made these flowers so special? You already had so many different flowers in your own garden. So then I bought a pot of my own, and boy do they smell deeelicious! They reminded me so much of you so of course I had to put it here, pthhpth!"

You tried to give a polite smile to match Bob's beaming face. But you weren't too sure how to take that compliment, if it even was one. Was he saying you were like a snack? Does he snack on flowers?

You decided not to dwell on it too much.  

Now when you looked back at the painting, it was as if it completely transformed before your eyes during the short length of your conversation with Bob. What was once sloppy, thick brush strokes were now intentional, and authentic. What was once meaningless shapes of abstraction have now turned into a thoughtful presentation of who you were in the mind of Bob.  

It was all so touching, you might have started tearing up a little.  

You tightly wrapped your arms around Bob.  

"Thank you. You have no idea how much I needed this right now."

He eagerly hugged you back.  

"Like I said, it's nothing." His lips curled into a bashful smile.  

Releasing each other from your embrace, you were surprised to see that somber expression return to his face. His brows furrowed in frustration.  

"I don't know who's judging these islands, but if I were them, I'd give you a ten star rating just because you worked so hard on it!"

You didn't have the heart to tell him that island ratings only went up to five.  

Bob continued on. Pride and determination lighting his eyes as he placed his paws on his hips.  

"I might even throw in a prize, like a day off, or a life-time supply of brownies!" A nervous chuckle bubbled out of him as he rubbed the back of his neck. "Uh, actually, that last part might be more of a prize for me than for you."

Now that he mentions it, you really do deserve a day-off, heck, maybe even a week-off. You put so much work into this island, it was only natural that you needed a break to regain your strength. Then, you'll be sure to get that five star rating!

You grabbed Bob's paw and headed towards the direction to your house.  

"It's been a while since we hanged out, huh? Well then let's go to my place for lunch," you said.  

"Really?!" Now it was Bob's turn to look surprised. Free food always got him excited.  

"Yeah!" You smiled. "Think of it as thanks for the painting."

"Sounds great!" Bob had already skipped on ahead of you, his face radiant. "Race ya!"

"Wait, Bob! My legs are still killing me from this morning, can you-"

Too late. With arms outstretched, Bob zig-zagged his way towards your house, already leagues ahead of you. For a guy who was always hungry, he sure did have boundless amounts of energy.  

You shook your head to yourself and smiled. Taking one last look at your painting before trudging along, you were already thinking of how to best frame it. You loved how brilliant it looked in the natural light. A nice spot by the window would be perfect.  

——————————————————————————

This was requested by @teagibs I hope you like it! Sorry it took so long :’-)

Please bear in mind that I’m still in school, so if anyone else has made a request, or would like to request something, it might be a while. I will also be doing requests in the order they come in. 

On another note, this was a lot of fun! Bob is one of my favorites, so I hope I did him justice. I currently have another one shot in the works (not a request), and ya’ll better brace yourself, cause it’s gonna be a dooozy...

Let me know what you guys think, constructive criticism is especially welcome here :D

-(･ω･)v

#animal crossing #new horizons #animal crossing new horizons #anch #animal crossing fanfiction #animalcrossingfanfic #fanfiction #one shot #xreader #animal crossing x reader #animal crossing bob #acnh bob #bob x reader #anchxreader #gift giving #bob is a dork #he probably people watches #cute #requests open #taking requests #fluff #animal crossing one shot

[carmenxjulia]

I put together a transcript of the 1 hour Q&A Interview the Carmen Sandiego Discord did with Abby Trott (Ivy) and Rafael Petardi (Chase Devineaux). All of the questions were submitted by server members. You can read everything below the break!

PizzaHorse:

Hello everyone! Please welcome Abby Trott and Rafael Petardi to our Q&A today.

Abby Trott:

Hiiiiiiiiiii!

Rafael Petardi:

Hello Bonjour!

PizzaHorse:

Let's get started. How did you get started as a voice actor? Was there anything that inspired you to pursue it as a career?

Abby Trott:

Oh MAN. Long story.

Rafael Petardi:

Mine is very short. I'm an actor and my agent started sending me on voice auditions and eventually I booked some!

Abby Trott:

This is a novel so I started typing it ahead of time, haha. I was an acting/theater major, and when I graduated from college I moved to Japan on the JET program to teach English because I wanted to travel so freakin' badly. I had never even been on an airplane. I was placed in rural Akita, (inaka), and absolutely LOVED it. The only problem was I wanted to be and actor/singer… womp womp. At that time, I also started to mess around with characters and voices - I would record voice memos and conversations with myself while driving around. One day, a friend was in the car and my phone was on shuffle and one of my "scenes" started playing - I was absolutely MORTIFIED. But that moment solidified for me that I need to move to the big ole city if I wanted to really pursue acting. I ended up heading to Tokyo, where I performed in children's musicals, and did other gigs here and there. That's where I started doing VO professionally! I was able to do some character voices for the shows I was in, and some other side projects. I realized how much I loved VO, and eventually decided to move back to the States to pursue it, since most English VO for games and animation is produced here.

When I moved back, I started searching online for VoiceOver opportunities, and stumbled across a contest hosted by Bang Zoom! Entertainment. I BARELY got my entry in on time. The contest took place over several months, and in the meantime, I moved to NYC and started taking VO classes. For the finale of the contest, they flew me to LA. I ended up winning! Still can't believe it. (O-O) I got to dub my first anime "Miss Monochrome," and realized that if I wanted to work in games and animation, I should probably move to LA… and the I DID.

THE END

PizzaHorse:

What do you think are the best and worst things about being a voice actor?

Abby Trott:

Oooh. The worst things? Job insecurity... constant rejection...

Rafael Petardi:

The incredibly talented and cool people you meet and work with.

What Abby said

Abby Trott:

The best things? Working with amazing people, AND it's so much fun - even auditioning is fun!

PizzaHorse:

How did you land your role on the show?

Rafael Petardi:

I auditioned

Got the job

pretty boring I know

Abby Trott:

I auditioned through my agency, and got a callback. I went to the callback and their note was "more Boston." Then I had a second callback and their note was "even MORE Boston." So I went WICKED BOSTON and got the job

PizzaHorse:

What was your favorite/the most fun thing to record (episode/scene/line)? Any least favorites?

Rafael Petardi:

For me, the funnest scenes to record are the ones I got to play opposte the incredibly talented cast.

The least favorite... did not have enough scenes with the Wonderful Abby Trott

Abby Trott:

Awww Rafe! Singing was the MOST FUN! The Karaoke Ep, and the choose-your-own adventure one, where we got to sing the theme! Mikey (Zack) was cracking me up constantly.

Least favorite was the last ep because I didn't want it to eeeeeend

PizzaHorse:

Were you allowed to suggest lines to be said by your character, or improvise the script at all if you thought something would add to the scene?

Abby Trott:

YUP! And Mikey and I definitely did, hahaa. It was encouraged. Always fun to see what they keep...

Rafael Petardi:

Yes we were. I improvised mostly sounds and noises. Words once in a while but not very often. Thank God for Duane

PizzaHorse:

What was the hardest part of voicing your character on Carmen Sandiego? Was there a particular episode that was difficult to record?

Rafael Petardi:

Keeping the consistency episode to episode of the Chase's accent, pitch and energy

I did not want hime to sound different ever

Abby Trott:

I think the hardest part was keeping up the EXTREME Boston accent. But it was also SUPER fun...

PizzaHorse:

What traits do you share or have in common with the character you play?

Rafael Petardi:

I am like Chase in the sense of a Dog with a Bone. If I get pasionate about something, I go to extremes. Abby Trott has scene this for example in my bread making endeavors

Also, I'm an idiot in life too sometimes

Abby Trott:

Ivy and I are both... from Mass! we both have brothers who we argue with but really do love when it comes down to it. We love chocolate, aaaaand... I think we're both brave. (brag?)

Can confirm Rafe is v. passionate about bread. And and idiot.

Rafael Petardi:

All True

PizzaHorse:

What character on the show would you voice if you had the chance?

Abby Trott:

Chase

Rafael Petardi:

I would love Maelstrom

Abby Trott:

Jk... Coach Brunt seems SUPER fun

PizzaHorse:

If you could meet a character from Carmen Sandiego in real life, who would it be and why?

Abby Trott:

Carmen! she is the coooooleeest. I'd ask her to teach me some tricks

Rafael Petardi:

Julie Argent. She's cute

PizzaHorse:

Which character do you think you are most like or that you most identify with?

Rafael Petardi:

CHASE

I think that's partly why we're doing the roles we do

Abby Trott:

I think Ivy, for real! Casting was ON IT. I can be serious when I need to be, but I'm a giant goofball (if you couldn't tell from my latest tweet/insta post...)

PizzaHorse:

Who is your favorite character, other than your own?

Abby Trott:

Mime. Bomb.

Rafael Petardi:

Other than my own? Hmmm... uuuh... mmmm. tough...

Abby Trott:

Seriously, I think Mime bomb is hilarious.

Rafael Petardi:

Yes Mime Bomb!

PizzaHorse:

Do you wish your character had more interactions with another character in particular?

Rafael Petardi:

Yes, I would love to interact with Ivy and Maelstrom

I think the interaction would be odd and awkward and funny

Abby Trott:

Yes. I would love to see how Ivy handles the specific VILE members... I would love to see IVY try to go to VILE academy...

PizzaHorse:

Are there any themes or lessons from the series that you would want people to remember?

Rafael Petardi:

yes, don't jump to conclusions and be an idiot

Abby Trott:

Yes! That! also, don't be evil. ALSO also, be loyal to your friends.

PizzaHorse:

Do you ever look at fan content?

Rafael Petardi:

yes all the time. It helps when I'm tagged rafaelPetardi on Instagram

Abby Trott:

Yes! I look at fanart sometimes, and see what cosplays are happenin'

Rafael Petardi:

I've posted many as well

Abby Trott:

Haven't read much fanfic... but I know it's out there.

PizzaHorse:

What did you think about your character's development and arc throughout the series?

Rafael Petardi:

I absolutely loooooooved Chase's arc

Love redemption stuff

he was just misguided

just was alway his thing

Abby Trott:

I love Ivy's journey - she really grew up, from a troubled kid to an adult, accepting responsibility and accepting new challenges. Donning the hat, if you will.

Rafael Petardi:

*justice as always his thing

PizzaHorse:

How do you feel now that Carmen Sandiego is at its end?

Rafael Petardi:

sad. miss evrybody so much

we will have to have a cast reunion when this pandemic thing is over

Abby Trott:

SAD! But grateful. It was THE MOST fun to record, and I wish it could continue forever.

Rafael Petardi:

I'm grateful too. yes

Abby Trott:

and YES reunion!

PizzaHorse:

Yesss can't wait for that group photo to pop up on social media!

Were there any moments in the series that had you legitimately emotional?

Rafael Petardi:

yes ofcourse

losing Julia was tough

Abby Trott:

A lot. But one that stands out for me is after Carmen gets stuck out in the snow, and is reunited with her crew. (:_;). Also the stuff with Shadowsan and his brother... and anything with baby Carmen...

Gah. So many...

PizzaHorse:

Did you enjoy how the show ended? Is there anything you would have changed or would have liked to see more of?

Rafael Petardi:

I loved the way the show ended! I think Duane did a fantastic job tying loose ends and bring the story to a satisfactory close for all characters

I do hope for an ACME Ivy, Zak, Julia and Chase spin-off

Abby Trott:

I love how it ends. I think it wrapped so well considering the number of eps - the writers really got it done. I WISH Ivy and Zack could follow Carmen forever, but she has her own story to unravel it would seem.

And Ivy does look good in that suit let me tell ya

PizzaHorse:

Can you share a favorite behind the scenes moment?

Abby Trott:

Mikey. Is. So. Funny. Hard to choose one moment - he would make me laugh harder than anything. Especially when we were singing. Or any time he had to gag...

Rafael Petardi:

OMG!

That singing stuff we had to do together was hilarious

we could not stop laughinh

PizzaHorse:

What, in your opinion, are the best pizza toppings?

Abby Trott:

Cheese. Caramelized onions. Roasted garlic. Spinach. Mushrooms.

Rafael Petardi:

buffala mozzarella and tomatos period

oooooo fancy Abby

Abby Trott:

Rafe why aren't you as obsessed with pizza as you are with bread? And can you be?

Rafael Petardi:

I am

Abby Trott:

!

Rafael Petardi:

I just don;t like to share pizza

PizzaHorse:

Here's a specific question for Rafael. Did you sometimes get mad at your own character for the way he behaved towards Julia earlier on in the Series?

And one for Abby. As a Massachusetts native, how did you feel about voicing a character from Boston with the iconic accent?

Rafael Petardi:

I did not. I always felt, however misguided Chase was, he was always on the path of turth and justice no matter what was in his way. It's the same principals that led hin to see the truth about Julia

*principles

Abby Trott:

I think it's so cool, and kind of an honor, in a way. I was worried about it being too much, and people saying it's over the top. Turns out comedy wins, haha.

PizzaHorse:

Were you familiar with the older animated series when you started work on the Netflix original?

Rafael Petardi:

I never heard of Carmen Sandiego before I did this series

Abby Trott:

Yes! I had seen a bit. I also remember watching my brother play the game. Someone gifted me a mini arcade version of the game this year, and I'm excited to play :slight_smile:

Rafael Petardi:

Which I think helped when I had to say the iconic line

"Where in th world..." there was no pressure

LoL

Abby Trott:

LOL

PizzaHorse:

Okay, last question. Do you have a favorite quote from the show?

Abby Trott:

"La Femme Rouge!"

or Mime Bomb's classic "..."

Rafael Petardi:

"the game is over!"

PizzaHorse:

Woohoo!

Abby Trott:

Hooray!

PizzaHorse:

Thank you so much Rafael Petardi and Abby Trott for joining us today! I hope everybody had a wicked awesome time.

Abby Trott:

Thanks for having us! What a pleasure.

Rafael Petardi:

It was great! Thank you to all the great questions.

Abby Trott:

Thanks for watching the show! Great questions. I'm sure I'm going to think of more quotes as soon as I log off... haha.

Rafael Petardi:

See you all soon!

Abby Trott:

Stay safe, take care, and see you all on various social media platforms!

#Carmen Sandiego #Ivy #Chase Devineaux #CS Crew #Rafael Petardi #Abby Trott #Carmen Sandiego Discord #Carmen Sandiego Discord Server #Interview #Transcript

[bae-roman]

I know it’s a bit early but I remember you saying you love Christmas so I hope this is fine but can I get a holiday themed [if they don’t celebrate actual Christmas] bunni and roman drabble that’s on the more mature side and maybe before they have kids [other than Nadia oviously but maybe she’s not involved] thank you!!!! 😁

Ahh! Thanks for the request babe! I LOOOOOOOVE Christmas SO MUCH. Honestly You could send me Christmas prompts in like April and I’d still be down.

I actually have a drabble I was working on last year so I’m just going to add onto that! Nadia may be involved a tad in the beginning but I’ll make it more mature at the end!

Putting some under the cut bc it gets smutty towards the end!

This would be their first Christmas together after bunny moved in. She had told Roman many times before about her love of everything Christmas related and he’d seen how perfectly decorated her old home had been. Hell, even the year before bunny bought piles of decorations to Roman’s house after discovering all he had was a tree and a wreath which was “completely and utterly unacceptable” and “akin to child abuse” as bunny had said. 

Roman was definitely not the most into Christmas, and had Nadia not been a factor, he would likely ignore the holiday altogether. 

When Bunny cared about something she really throws herself into it and what Roman didn’t know is that Bunny had actually been toning down her Christmas spirit in the previous years. Since she had never lived alone, she always had to compromise on her decor. Even though her previous roomies were her friends and had a bit more tolerance for her antics, she still wanted to be respectful of common living areas and not shove her decorations down their throats, even if that meant having only 1 Christmas tree. 

So, now living with Roman in what she considered her home as well, she was finally able to go all out, and let me tell you -  she did. Roman went to work on December 1st to his house looking normal and came back that night to something like this

(Of course their house doesn’t look like this, but it’s how bunny hung their lights)

Like Roman is practically blinded by it while driving down the street. 

Additionally, all the trees on their property were also lit up and decorated just as extravagantly. Even if Roman wasn’t a bit of a grinch, he’d still consider this too much. When he entered the house things only got worse. While aesthetically it looked good, Roman couldn’t get over the fact that his home now closely resembled the inside of a Christmas store. 

He was greeted by Nadia running up to him, like she always did when he come home, “Don’t you like it Daddy? Bunny said I didn’t have to go to school if I helped! Isn’t it pretty?” 

Nadia was obviously very excited about the state of the house and as much as Roman loathed it, the last thing he wanted to do was disappoint his little girl so, he hid his disdain behind a fake smile and said the house looked lovely.

When Nadia dragged him away to show him the Christmas tree in her room he caught Bunny’s eye and sent her a quick scowl, but Bunny only laughed. 

After seeing the pink Christmas explosion that occurred in Nadia’s room, he took a quick look through the rest of the house, discovering every room had their own tree and separate theme. If he wasn’t so horrified that he had to live here for the next month, he’d be somewhat impressed. 

The one thing he actually did like was the main Christmas tree in the living room. Bunny had moved things around (or rather, had paid many people to move things around) so that it was centered around this colossal tree. The thing was huge but beautiful all the same. It reminded Roman of one he’d seen as a child on a trip with his father to Time’s square.

While he didn’t love the rest of the house, he appreciated that bunny had left his office alone and kept their bedroom decor to a minimum. He bitched about the decorations all month long but ultimately, didn’t order her to remove them. 

This would come to bite him in the ass the following year, though, because Bunny went even harder the next year. 

Now, let’s skip to the evening of Christmas day...

After they had put Nadia down for bed Roman and Bunny went back to the living room for a drink. 

The two of them were talking about nothing in particular for a while before roman started wandering around the tree. It was large enough that Bunny couldn’t see him on the other side but she heard some shuffling so she called out, asking what he was doing. 

Roman re-emerged holding a present, “There was one left, it says it’s for you” 

“Ooh! Does it say who it’s from? I don’t recognize the wrapping paper” Bunny was too excited about the prospect of another gift that she didn’t even notice the odd way Roman was holding the box. His arms were hanging low and he was holing it on both sides, right below his waist. 

Just as bunny was about to snatch it out of his hands, he stopped her. She looked up at him and pouted, “hey!”

“It’s uh really heavy. I guess whatever’s in here is pretty huge. Maybe just open the lid?”

“Fine, just give it to me”

When it came to presents, bunny was almost like a child. She loved gifts and surprise ones were even better. 

Once again, ignoring Roman’s odd behavior, she opened the lid of her gift and found ... Roman’s dick. 

Bunny looked up at Roman, a shit eating grin plastered on his face, and looked back down at the contents of the box again before bursting into laughter. 

“Wow, just what I needed!”, Bunny played along, “no wonder it was so heavy, maybe you should put it down...”

Bunny took Roman’s hand and led him to the couch. He stood by the side as she got on her knees, resting her elbows on the arm of the loveseat, facing him. She carefully took off the box, freeing his member and taking it in her hands. Roman undid the buttons of his pants and let them fall down while Bunny took the tip of his length into her mouth. Roman pushed her hair out of her face and gripped it at the back of her head, nudging her head to take more of him in. She obeyed and slowly took more and more of him in until she was at the base, Roman let out a soft groan and leaned over to pull her top down to expose her chest. He licked his thumb and forefinger before reaching down and playing with her nipples. 

Bunny continued to increase her pace until she felt Roman beginning to twitch inside her. She let him fall out of her mouth and got up to give him a kiss. She felt his tongue battle against hers as their bodies pushed against eachother. 

Bunny ran her hands down from Roman’s neck to the collar of his shirt and tugged at the buttons until they ripped off. Roman slid his hands down her body, stopping to grip her bunched up top and dragging it down over her ass. Once he let the fabric go, he cupped Bunny’s ass in his hands and lifted her so that her legs were wrapped around him. 

The fabric of her tights on his bare cock hardened him further and when the pair broke apart, he set bunny down on her feet and quickly removed the rest of her clothing so that they were both naked.

Bunny went back to the couch, this time sitting on it normally and widened her legs. Roman licked his lips and knelt down, putting a hand on each of her knees. 

He spread her legs even further and pushed her back before bringing his plump lips to her core. He teased her at first, nipping at her thighs and licking her all over, except for her clit. He knew how crazy that drove her. When he heard her let out a little whine, he smirked to himself before giving her clit his full attention. Bunny arched her back and tried to move her thighs together but Roman’s firm grip stopped her from being able to interrupt his work. Roman felt her walls begin to tighten around his fingers and, just as she did to him, stopped his actions. 

They both had a hate-love relationship with edging eachother. On one hand, being so close to your climax and then not reaching it was almost unbearable however, they knew that the sex to come would be 10 times more wild. 

Almost like she could read his mind, Bunny flipped herself over on the couch so that she was again on her knees but this time her upper body leant against the back of it. 

Roman ran his member across her slit, coating it in her juices before sliding it inside her. He took full control of Bunny’s hips and made achingly slow movements. He began to quicken his pace and it wasn’t long before he was bottoming out inside of her. They were both moaning fairly loudly. Roman ran one of his hands down from her ass to her clit and played with it while he fucked her. It wasn’t long before he once again felt her walls constrict around him but this time he let her reach her high. He followed not long after and rested on top of her. 

When they were finished, bunny made sure to pick up their clothes and head upstairs. Roman, who had followed her into their room, lay on their bed while she went into the closet. Roman assumed that she was putting the laundry away or something since she was in there for a while but was pleasantly surprised when she came back out in... this

“So, I guess we had the same idea ...”, Bunny said as she posed in the doorway, showing off her little outfit. She looked at him over her shoulder and asked, “You ready to open your gift?”

#roman godfrey imagine #Roman Godfrey #christmas themed #christmas #smut #hemlock grove imagine #hemlock grove #request #Bill Skarsgård

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #463

“the siren sings a lonely song of all the wants & hungers  /  the lust of love, a brute desire”

Describe the person that you would like to be in three years. I want my mental health to be in great condition, I really want to be in much better physical shape, ideally be living with somebody in our own place, have a job I'm happy with, have an improved social life, my own license and car... Think back to when you first met your significant other (or ex). Was your first impression of them accurate? It's funny, I honestly don't remember what my first impression of Girt was. I don't even recall our first interaction. I'm sure it was most likely that he was friendly, because he is and always has been. What is your most noticeable personality trait? Probably that I'm really, really shy. What kind of natural disaster is most common where you live? Hurricanes. Which of your family members do you resemble the most? I guess one of my immediate sisters? People tend to say stuff like they can definitely tell we're related. Have you ever had an animal get into your attic? No. Who knows you better than anyone else? Hell, probably whoever reads these. When was the last time you started a “new chapter” of your life? I guess you could call dating Girt a "new chapter." I have a much, much stronger feeling of this attempt being more successful than the last now that I've been able to change my angle on how I see him. What’s the most expensive thing your car needed to get done? I don't have my own vehicle and never have. If you had a thousand dollars to spend on a pricey brand you like but can’t really afford (until now of course), which ONE brand would you choose? *shrug* Most products of highly expensive brands I find hideous anyway. Do you still talk to any of your old teachers? Yeah. One is a close family friend and actually our landlord. Does your family still use the home phone or are you all on cell phones now? We haven't had a landline is yeeeeaaarrrrsssss. Ever go to another school’s prom? No; my boyfriend went to the same school as me. Do you ever venture into the woods? What do you normally do there? No; we live in the city now. :/ When I DID live in the woods, I absolutely loved wandering around with my camera for stuff to take pics of. Does your significant other ever make you mix CDs? None ever have but omg I wish that would be adorable. How did you dress your freshman year of high school? I was one of them emo kids. Would you ever date your best friend of the opposite sex? WELP that's what I'm doing lol. Would you say you have a high sex drive or not so much? I'd call it normal? Higher sometimes, lower other times, but not to either extreme. Come with an unpopular opinion. Silent Hill: Homecoming is a great game and while there's a lot of fan service from the movie, it belongs in the series. It's actually my second (or third)-favorite installment. Most of the SH community absolutely hate that game. What’s the worst thing a friend has either done or said to you? A lot of shit Colleen would say if we got into arguments. She'd ridicule effects of my depression, said I'd never know what it's like to pay my own bills, stuff like that. She's hateful as fuck and everything cut deep. What’s fake about you? Like extensions, fake nails, botox etc. Nothing physical. If you got the chance, would you audition for a reality show? No. Have you ever gotten into a Facebook fight? More than once. What’s the cheesiest thing you’ve ever experienced irl? Hm, I'm unsure. Favorite flavor of jelly bean? Probably watermelon. Do you use Tinder? If yes, have you ever met up with someone you matched? No. You do you, but if I understand Tinder correctly, it just seems... really shallow to me. Like don't you JUST see their picture to decide if you're interested or not? It just enforces the false belief that appearance really matters in love. You just poured your heart out to your crush and all he/she does is respond “k”. What do you respond/do? Well, I don't have a crush anymore; my boyfriend and I literally exchanged "I love you"s last night. That's not a crush. But for the sake of the question, I'll imagine I was single and this happened, in which case I would be both hurt and annoyed. Like, either tell me you return the feelings or not. It's not hard. What's your favorite thing to order from McDonald’s? I usually get a quarter pounder w/ cheese or a McDouble, occasionally with a small or medium fry, depending on how hungry I am. When do you feel your sexiest? Never, hunny. What's your favorite emoji? I don't really have one? It just depends on what the situation calls for. What’s your skincare routine? I don't really have one... I just use a washcloth to clean my face. Who all out of your immediate family smokes? My dad and stepmom. Do you like incense or candles better? Incense, totally. Do you respect your parents? Yeah. What’s your bf/gf’s name? It's technically Donald Jr., but since high school, I've known him as Girt, a nickname I won't explain for his privacy. Do you wear glasses? Yeah. Do you like The Beatles? I honestly don't. Except "Hey, Jude." What was the last reason you got excited? Last night. When we were saying goodbye, I was scared to, but I told Girt I loved him, and he immediately said it back confidently. My heart did like five flips. I'm still over the moon about it. Yes, we just got back together, but we've been in each other's lives as a constant since HS, and after changing my angle of how I looked at him, it's not at all platonic anymore. Do you know anyone who drinks the pickle juice from the jar? Sara does alskdjfklwejrl;er Name something crazy that’s happened recently? Uhhhh... I dunno. My life is very uneventful to have something really "crazy" happen. Can you say for a fact that you’re happy right now? I'm happy about some things, but also nervous and self-doubtful. Have you ever zip lined? No, but they look fun. I'd just be really scared of losing my grip. If you broke your computer, would you be able to fix it on your own? Ha, no. Have you ever been on a boat and got sick? No, but the one time I was at the beach and on a boat riding to an island, I was TERRIFIED I was going to get sick because of the waves. I didn't, thankfully. Did you sleep well last night? For the most part. My new mask might just be working. Do your parents try and plan your life for you? Not at all. Do you have any pictures of you kissing someone? Yes. List two things about yourself that you find embarrassing. My weight and how dark my leg hair is. Do you like to cuddle with your pet when you are sad? Yes. Do you find piercing attractive or unattractive? h o t Do you have any secret hiding spots in your room? To put money, yes. Do you like parmesan cheese on your spaghetti? Ew, no. I don't like parmesan. Does your best girl friend have any talents that you don’t? Yeah. She can animate well, for one. And sing like a fucking champ. Do you have any video game systems in your room? Which one(s)? My Nintendo DS Lite is in here. Well, and my laptop is a gaming one. What color eyes does the last person you kissed have? ... Oh WOW I've known this man for a fuckin decade and somehow I'm not sure??? But I want to say light blue? Have you ever taken a ride in a helicopter? No. Have you ever visited hot springs? No. How slowly or quickly would you say you eat? I'm aware I eat too fast, because my mom will point it out almost without fail if we eat in sight of each other. I'm not a messy eater at all, just... fast. Chewing your food and swallowing isn't a complex task. I've made active efforts to slow down, I just haven't been able to succeed. It doesn't feel normal. That and I've come to discover that when I chew food TOO much, I don't like the mushy texture of it in my mouth. What did you do the last time you were with friends? Yesterday Girt and I planned to watch shitty Netflix anime for some laughs, but we wound up starting Attack on Titan, which I am officially pretty into. What kind of cologne/perfume do you like the opposite sex to wear? I don't care if they wear any or not, so long as they know how to clean themselves and therefore not actually smell bad. If you celebrate Christmas, do you get a real tree or an artificial tree? We always use a fake one. Is there someone who means a lot to you but they don’t know that? My sisters probably don't, really... Is money important to you? Live your whole life poor and I want to see you answer "no" to this. Have you ever watched a meteor shower? No. Do you like Slim Jims? LOOOOOOOVE them. Would you rather write a mystery or love story? Love story. Are you muscular? No. Working for it. Do you have one of those removable hand-held shower heads? Yes. Originally, this house didn't, but I hated it so much that Mom bought one. How many burners does your stove have? Four. Has your car ever been broken into? Mom's hasn't.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''blood milk and sky'' by white zombie

[cynic-spirit]

The Poem Series (23) Night, Street, Lamp, Drugstore– John Wick

Previous Parts!!!

After the wonderful weekend, the college reopens. Skylar and Diana are sitting together in the cafeteria sipping their coffees. Skylar notices the changed mood of Diana.

“You seem extra happy”

“I am.. “ Diana said smiling.

“Care to elaborate..?”

“I moved in with John..”

“WHAT?? For REAL???”

“Yes.”

“Havent you known him for like only a week?”

“Yes”

“So… that’s fast even by my standards”

“The situation we have is different.”

“Details please”

“I cannot tell much”

“all right.. So how is he in bed”

“SKY!!!”

“What? It’s a perfectly reasonable question”

“We haven’t done IT yet”

“WHATTT?? What do you do then?”

“We did…. Have done……..other stuff” Diana said with reddened cheeks, hiding behind her coffee.

“…and…?”

“Skylar, not a college appropriate topic of discussion”

“No ones around”

“I am not talking about this here.”

“Okay lets go to the club today. Its been two weeks, we haven’t been there”

“You know what, yes. Its been a while. Lets go to the club”

“Will you sing?”

“I am not doing that again, sky!!”

“Oh come on, you have such a wonderful voice”

“Lets See. See you after class here?”

“Done!” Skylar and Diana part ways to their respective classes.

John, in his house is sitting with Dog. He has made some calls about Borgov. New information has merged and John is not happy about it. He will need to go again, but this time he is more confident. He has trained Diana over the past week in self-defense, come combat skills. He will also teach her to fire a gun, not a big one, a pocket one. He has some models in mind, like Bond Arms Backup, Ruger LC9 or Smith & Wesson Bodyguard. Diana will never have to worry or look over her shoulder again. As he gently rubs Dog’s back his phone chimes. It’s a message from Diana.

“Hey John, don’t come to pick me up today”

John furrows his brows and messages back.

“Why? Is everything okay Diana?”

Yeah, everything’s fine.Just going out to the Nightimes Funtimes with my girls”

“When will you be back?”

“I am not sure. 😉”

“I will come to pick you up at the club, just call me.”

“Stop worrying so much John, I am not a baby”

“You are my baby, love”

“John, I promise I will be safe. I’ll send you pics”

“Love you”

“Love you too John <3 <3”

John turns to dog and speaks. Looks like Persephone is not coming soon tonight boy, wanna come with me to bind some books, Dog barks. John realizes how his life has changed in a span of a couple of weeks. Before, he was not sure of living at all, now he had started to imagine his life with a woman. She was not just any woman, she was tremendously talented, well-read, and was not afraid to call on John for his wrongdoings. He liked her assertion and honesty and the fact that she was not even in the slightest bit afraid of his work. She had accepted his love with open arms and heart and that made John feel humane, a feeling that decades of being an assassin and killing people had taken away from him. He had a couple of hours to go to the club and pick her up. He also had to finish the book binding of the book tonight. Only little work was left, then the glue and binding would take a few days to dry. Diana’s birthday was in two weeks and he wanted to gift it to her. He almost felt jealous of her being out with her friends. He wanted nothing more than to keep her to himself without any interference, but he knows that Diana is an independent woman and he would not like to change that. John also had got her something special. He was not sure but he had known that women loved jewelry. He had got Diana a two carat pink diamond stud in a white gold chain. The rare pink diamond was for the unique and rare woman that Diana was.

John also opened a smaller velvet box, and held it open. He hazed at the five carat princess cut diamond that he had planned to give her when the time was right. He vowed, it will be soon. With that, John kept the two boxes in the top drawer of his work table . He switched on the lamp and began to put final touches on the book.

“To Diana beating us all in the game of love” A drunk Skylar yells on the club table.

“Hear Hear!!!” joined Jennifer and Anna.

“Good God!”

“Come on Diana, live a little”

“She is drunk on looooooove” stutters Anna

“We should send John a video”

“No that’s a bad idea”

“Lets make him jealous!!!

“NO! please”

“oh no one is asking you D”

John is working in his basement on Diana’s book. He is lowly humming one of the Schumann’s symphonies. He is lost n work when his phone chimes again, its from Diana. From the notification of it, it appears it’s a video. John plays it and to his restlessness its Skylar, sending a video from her phone. There are two other girls, whom John does not recognize but they were there when John had first heard Diana sing. The video goes on to see a very drunk Skylar speaking.

“Hey Mr. Wick, guess whooooo…its meeee… Sky!!! We have kidnapped your guuuurl frind … and if you don’t come, we will send her to…….that guy” Skylar turns the phone camera towards a random guy at the bar. “……that’s where you also met her……didn’t ya!!! Mr wick!!! Skylar giggles” The video ends.

John first smiles. Diana’s friends are nice and good. She needs this. The last few weeks must have been exhausting, the attack, the sudden change in living conditions. But then it strikes John, he didn’t see Diana in the video, he sees it a few times. Wait, was she going to the man at the bar? John’s posture changes. Diana loves him, she isn’t going to flirt with a random man just like that. Will She? But that man is normal. He can give Diana a normal life. And just like that John is over powered by some feeling of jealousy over an imaginary man. He picks up his keys and goes off to the club.

Diana comes back from the washroom and sees Skylar and her other friends laughing and giggling. She sits down with them. It feels right to let go some times.

“Sing something for us Diana”

“Oh my God! NO”

“Yeah, you have such a great voice”

“No No No…”

“Oh come on Di, its such a dull night, its all Night, street, lamp, drugstore, A dull and meaningless light. Sing for us.”

“What do I Sing?”

Skylar suddenly notices, that John is standing on the entryway, he is probably looking for Diana and she knows if Diana sees him, she wont sing. SO immediately she says.

“Something Bob Dylan”

Diana takes a long sip of her whiskey and then goes up on the stage. “I hate you all” She murmurs.

John has reached the club. He also feels stupid coming here like this. But then his possessive and jealous side overtook his thinking, when it comes to Diana, it happens most often. So he decided he will sit in the corner, without disturbing the girls and drink. When Diana calls he will show up to pick her up. He wont embarrass her in front of her girl friends. When he entered, he looks around, and he sees Diana walking up on the stage. He smiles, the things that started it all. Her voice. Will she sing the same song? Maybe not, maybe, John cannot resist. He is almost thankful he came.

Diana takes the stage. And she sings.

The song (Please Listen, its awesome)

Diana finishes the song. The people are mesmerized. Diana feels shy, she wanted to sing blowin’ in the wind and then she thought of John and the song just came out. When she looks up from the stage, she sees John. Pupils Dilated, absolutely predatory gaze, looking taller and broader than he usually is, John was walking with some certainty towards her. Before she could say something, John picks her up from the stage, bridal style, and walks out, without caring who is looking.

John cannot control now. So sexy, so tempting, that sultry voice, that song, those words. She was calling him. It was for him that she sang. But this time, John is not going to let her vanish after the song. Of all the things, why did she have to sing this song. Then the people, the people at the club, they all were looking at her. She is mine stop looking at her he thought. At that instant, John wanted to kill each and everyone in the club. He wont, Diana is his and he will make sure that she knows it too. So without any inhibition, he walks towards the stage, without any thought, he picks her up and takes her out of the club. He doesn’t care of her friends are looking. Yeah, Diana is his. Diana is totally wrecked in embarrassment, she almost shrieks

“John!! What…What are you doing?”

No answer. John keeps walking.

“People are looking, put me down”

No answer. They have reached his car.

“JOHN!!!”

No answer. John bends his knee and opens the door of the car without putting Diana down. He then puts her on the car seat and secures the seat belt. He closes the car door almost runs to the other side and before Diana can even guess, he drives off in full speed.

“JOHN!!! What the HELL!!!

John turns his face slightly. He doesn’t say anything but his gaze leaves Diana in shivers and creates a wet pool between her legs. She almost whispers now,

“John, what are you doing?”

“I’ll make you my baby tonight, love”

Diana gasps.

#john wick #john wick fanfic #john wick x ofc #john wick x original character #john wick x original female character #john wick x reader #john wick x you #john wick x y/n #john wick imagine #john wick fanfiction #john wick fan #john wick fluff #fluff #the continental #continental #the boogeyman #boogeyman #baba yaga #keanu #keanu reeves #keanu reeves imagine #keanu reeves fluff #keanu reeves x reader #keanu reeves x you #keanu reeves x y/n #keanu reeves fanfiction #keanu reeves fanfic #fanfic #fanfiction

[ashesonthefloor]

you’re like a breath of fresh air in my lungs  (ot4)

summary: 5 times Ashton gets jealous of how close his bandmates have gotten, and 1 time he doesn’t (alternatively: Ashton doesn’t know how to sort through his feelings. his bandmates help him) ao3 found here

word count: 5,916

content warning: mild jealousy, descriptions of sadness and inability to breathe, sexual implications (non descriptive)

A/N: hello! it’s me again with my attempt at a 5+1! never written one before but I had fun! also never posted any angst on here and haven’t written it in ages. I don’t really think this is angst, though, I’ve been calling it pseudo angst. shoutout to @clumsyclifford and @calumcest for letting me scream about this conceptually even though I never mentioned much about the actual plot. it does have a very fluffy ending (and I might write an epilogue if asked), so no worries. just lots of introspection and Ashton being stuck in his head and overthinking. I imagined them a few years younger, since this is very....ah, less mature than I think they’d behave now. regardless. please enjoy! 

title from Ready or Not by Bridgit Mendler

No one is entirely sure who starts it, but all bets are on Luke. It’s only noticeable once it becomes a Thing. When Luke leans in to press a quick kiss to whoever’s cheek is closest any time he has to leave. It gets extra noticeable when they all start leaning into it. 

It remains just that, an unspoken Thing that none of them broach, left alone and quiet so no one really has to think about the implications or what it means.That was, of course, until Michael decided he was going to go against the unspoken rule, and bring it up when they’re clustered in the kitchen. Minus Luke, who was off doing god knows what. 

“Luke’s been extra clingy lately,” Michael started, gaze shifting from Calum to Ashton and back again. His tone was conversational, but it was clear - to Ashton, at least - that he was trying to go somewhere with it. Trying to push for information. He was perched on the counter, legs swinging in the very I’m-not-always-aware-of-what-my-body-is-doing sort of way that was very Michael. 

Calum sipped his coffee, letting out a hum. “He’s always clingy.” It seemed like Calum wanted to talk about it about as much as Ashton did. 

“Okay, yeah, but he kissed you this morning,” Michael pointed out, like it meant something. And maybe it did, Ashton just really didn’t want to think about it. He liked the dynamics they had. Questioning anything Luke did was just a good way to get confused; he rarely knew what he was doing enough to explain it to others, figuring out his logic was complicated in its own right. 

“He did,” Calum agreed, sly smile coming onto his face. It had only been a kiss on the cheek, no cause for alarm. But, for Ashton, it was still very much cause for alarm. Maybe.  “Are you jealous?”

Michael started, expression shifting into the annoyed scowl he’d perfected years ago. “No! I’m just- I just meant he’s been weirdly clingy lately. Fuck off, Cal.”

Ashton snorted at that, unable to help himself. “You sound jealous.” He didn’t like stoking the fire of Michael’s annoyance - or continuing pointless arguments - but it was easier than the subject matter at hand. He didn’t want to think about the way his stomach twisted at the thought of Luke kissing all of them the way he was, didn’t want to understand what or why he was feeling. 

“Fuck off,” was Michael’s eloquent response, leaning back against the wall, swinging his legs again, so his heels hit against the cabinets below in time with Ashton’s rapid heartbeat. Bump bump. Bump bump. At least his heartbeat wasn’t scuffing the paint.

“Seriously,” Michael said, leaning forward a little, fringe in his eyes. Ashton didn’t brush it out this time the way he normally did, hand staying firmly on his mug of coffee. “What’s up with him?”

“I think he’s just lonely or something, Mikey,” Calum consoled, taking over the position of peacemaker in Ashton’s determined silence. “Either that or he’s got a crush on you.” He poked at Michael’s thigh, trying to keep things lighthearted. 

Michael squirmed over slightly with a laugh. “Fuck off,” he said, for the third time since they’d gathered in the kitchen twenty minutes ago, long enough to brew a pot of coffee and have uncomfortable conversations. “No, really. I don’t think he does. He’s doing it to all of us. You and Ashton included.” His gaze flickered over to Ashton. So he really did want to talk about it. 

“Okay, and?” Calum glanced over at Ashton before back to Michael. “What about it?”

“It’s weird, that’s what.” Michael leaned back against the upper cabinets again, head hitting them with a soft thunk. “He didn’t always do that.”

Ashton wasn’t listening so much anymore. He sipped his coffee, gaze somewhere on the cabinets above Michael’s brightly dyed hair. He was distracted, caught up in his own thoughts, memories of a few weeks ago before this all started. Nimble fingers tugging at his shirt buttons, laughter lost against his lips when they’d stumbled, teeth catching his lower lip, blonde curls silky between his fingers when he’d reached out and tugged. It hadn’t gotten far - not near as far as they’d anticipated - they’d been too sober for it to seem anything but too comfortable. It had been Ashton to voice his concerns first - should we be doing this, is this okay, what if the others find out - and Luke had pulled back, disappointment in his eyes like he’d expected it to be easy. He still remembered just how cold his sheets had felt, empty and bare the way they had been since that night. No late night Luke crawling in because he got lonely and needed company, or because he had a bad dream and needed consolation, or because he wanted to talk about his dreams for the band, for them, and Ashton was always willing to listen. 

Ashton drained his coffee mug and set it into the sink maybe a little harder than he should have, deciding he didn’t want to be part of the conversation, and turned to leave the kitchen. The last thing he caught was Michael’s “Fuck, what’s gotten into him?”

*****

It doesn’t get brought up for a few days, giving Ashton a short but sweet respite from having to think about the unhappiness simmering in the pit of his stomach, the way it twisted whenever he caught Luke kissing the other two, something a little too close to jealousy for his comfort, even if Ashton determinedly didn’t think about it, or which way it went.

Luke settled himself into Calum’s lap on the couch, ruining whatever game he’d been trying to play against Michael. “Come on, that’s cheating!” Calum laughed, hands abandoning the controller to drop to Luke’s waist, anyway, trying to look around him at the screen. 

“All’s fair in love and war,” Michael sang triumphantly, grin on his face as he crossed the finish line in Mario Kart, tossing his controller down to do a victory dance that was more an aborted flail of his limbs, shimmying a little in place, complete with sticking his tongue out in the most mature display of bragging Michael was capable of.

“This isn’t love or war,” Calum pointed out, though he didn’t look too put out that he’d lost, anyway. 

“What are you talking about? Mario Kart counts as war,” Michael said, at the same time Luke said “it might be love.”

And that got everyone’s attention, three pairs of eyes snapping up to Luke’s face almost instantly.. “What did you say?” Ashton finally spoke up from where he was sitting in the armchair, glancing up from his phone screen in time to watch Luke turn pink. The kind of pink that reminded him of when it got cold and Luke refused to wear a jacket, just so he could steal Ashton’s, or Calum’s or Michael’s. His nose just wasn’t pink, now, but the colour of his face certainly made up for that.

Luke was the most attention-driven of the four of them - though Calum certainly didn’t mind it at all, most of the time - so him blushing was a little bit strange. Which was only confounded by his equally strange response. “I didn’t say anything,” he said, clearly avoiding the question. “Maybe we should order pizza.”

“Fuck yeah,” Michael said, easily bought and distracted. 

“Wait-“ Ashton said, trying to ask again. 

“You heard him,” Calum said with a grin, squeezing Luke’s hips just to make him shift on his lap and laugh. “He said he loooooooves us.” His hands creeped up to poke at his sides. 

“Cal! Stop!” Luke managed to get through his giggles, as Calum started actively tickling his sides. 

Ashton just frowned a little bit, sinking further into the chair. When Michael wanted to talk about complicated things, they all had to comply. But, apparently, not when Ashton did. What was going on with the three of them, anyway? Hadn’t the tickle fights been abandoned in grade school? He didn’t want to think about the now-familiar twist in his gut. It was forming into something tangible, too, shifting and morphing to be accompanied by an ache in his chest that, if he were any more poetic, he would insist was a hole in his heart. A very Luke shaped hole. Or, more precisely, a more uncomplicated version of his band shaped hole, back when he didn’t have to think about things too much, or when he didn’t feel that awful ache when Calum had his hands up on Luke like that, Michael moving in to poke at him from the side. He wasn’t sure they’d ever fully been like this, though. Years of living in close quarters had blurred ang boundaries they may have had at one point. Ashton seemed to be the only one that had any left. 

And that, too, was its own form of miserable, feeling constantly like he was on the outside, looking in, unable to participate. The ache was back now, full force, and he pulled his gaze to the TV, even though he really wasn’t paying attention to anything anymore. He hated this feeling, hated feeling like the last one in on a joke, or like he was always the one dragging his feet. It went along with being the reasonable one, though, and he couldn’t abandon that, or Luke would try and microwave eggs again and they’d burn the whole place down. 

“Ashton,” Michael finally said, face flushed and words breathless, nothing but happiness in his eyes. “Can you order the pizza?”

And, just once, Ashton really hated being the reasonable one.

*******

“You have to stay still,” Luke chastised, still perched carefully in his lap. He’d insisted on doing Ashton’s makeup - though he really wasn’t sure how much of an expert Luke was on it to begin with - and as soon as he’d agreed, albeit slightly reluctantly, Luke had been climbing into his lap, eyeliner in hand. It seemed like he already knew what he wanted to do. 

“I’m not the one moving around.” And he was pretty sure about that. His hands were still on Luke’s hips, trying to hold him steady and keep from wobbling around. 

“Yeah, you are.” Luke’s breath was warm on his cheek, comforting in a way he wouldn’t have expected from someone who forgot to brush his teeth way too often when he was younger. He hadn’t been this close to Luke since that night, a week and a half ago, when Luke had given him that look with enough hurt to shatter his soul, and left before he could put it back together again. 

“Whatever you say.” It was easier than continuing to argue, or coming up with a well considered reply. Luke’s fingers, too, were just as warm, one hand holding his jaw to keep his head tilted up, like he needed the constant reminder, the knuckles of his other hand brushing his cheek as he worked on Ashton’s winged liner. He was reminded of those same fingers brushing against more of his bare chest with every button that opened, the way Luke felt laughing into their kiss, head tipped down slightly to meet his, eyelashes brushing Ashton’s cheek when he tipped his head just a little too far as they maneuvered to the bed. He could feel the rhythmic in and out of his breathing, his heartbeat steady in its cage, too, because of how close they were now, Luke leaning over him, knees bracketing Ashton’s hips, lower legs pressed warm and steady against Ashton’s thighs. 

Luke didn’t reply, for once seeming to prefer the silence, and leaned forward instead, switching his focus to the other eye. With no noise between them, other than the sound of their breathing, all Ashton could really focus on was the sound of his own heartbeat, thudding a too-fast rhythm in his chest like he was at his drum kit working out his emotions, letting the steady thud of his bass drum drown out anything else he could be thinking about. And, god, he wished he was there now, instead of here, fingers a little lower than they should be, thoughts flickering between Luke and his unending warmth and presence, and the other guys in the band, and what they would do if they walked in to see Luke in his lap, so close Ashton could feel his breath, smell the blue jolly rancher he’d had in his mouth before he’d started this whole thing. It was too complicated, too many things to focus on at once, and he was trying to keep his mind in one place. It just wasn’t working very well. 

“There,” Luke said at last, letting go of his eye and pulling back. “Now you just need lipstick.”

Ashton opened his eyes, immediately preparing to argue. “Wait, I thought you said-“

“I said I was doing your makeup. Makeup includes lipstick,” Luke cut him off, having seemingly expected Ashton’s trepidation. 

He leaned over and grabbed the tube of lipstick before leaning over him again. “Open your mouth a little,” he instructed, opening the lipstick and slowly starting to apply it once Ashton obeyed him. His hands were surprisingly steady, now, no hint of the nervous tremor he had sometimes in interviews, hand slipping soundlessly into Ashton’s underneath the table where no one could see. Not that it really mattered if they did, but people could be unkind, and they didn’t need any more rumors about their band. Not after the one about Michael and Calum sleeping together - or, worse, the one where /all/ of them had been. 

As far as rumors went, it wasn’t the worst. It didn’t bring good things for the band, though, not with social stigma being the way it was. But it wasn’t the worst thought, being with the three guys. They were his closest friends, and the people he trusted with his life. And it was absolutely, without a doubt, leagues about the rumor where he had been a cheater. He hadn’t had a girlfriend, or a partner, or anyone, but someone had run a story flat out saying he’d cheated on some girl. That had taken a lot of fixing, and no one had been pleased. He remembered how angry Michael had been on his behalf, threatening to call the publisher and ‘give them a piece of his mind’, Luke having already taken the position of comforting Ashton, sliding his hand into his to give him something to hold. He hadn’t been that broken up about it, honestly, but it had been touching, the way they all came together to try and help. He still remembered Calum pulling him aside later, hand on his shoulder and concerned frown that he wore so well already on his face, asking if he was okay or if he needed a hug, and that he would get one anyway. And yeah, if he had to date more than one person, they’d probably be a good choice. 

“Done!” Luke announced, smiling a little. He shifted back on Ashton’s thighs to inspect his work, head tilting to the right, when Calum and Michael came in. 

“Honey, I’m home!” Michael called as he walked in, laughing slightly to himself afterward. Calum just rolled his eyes fondly as they stepped across the doorframe, both pausing a little in place as they caught sight of Luke and Ashton. 

“Whoa.” Michael was the first to speak. “You look good, Ash. Got a hot date later?”

“Yeah,” Ashton replied, getting over his momentary shock of being walked in on with Luke still in his lap, hands just a little too tight on his hips. “With your mum.”

Michael snorted, but it earned him an actual laugh from Calum. “You do look good. The lipstick looks nice. And I like the little heart on your cheekbone.” Calum tapped a finger against his own face, presumably where the heart was on Ashton’s. 

“You added a heart?” Ashton asked. That explained what he’d been doing there, then. 

Luke shrugged. “It looks cute.”

“It does look cute. You look ready to do a little dance for us, Ash,” Michael continued, ever the supportive friend. “Could always toss on a skirt.” He sounded less cutting and more intrigued than he was probably aiming for. Calum just gave him a look and, since he was closest, poked him in the ribs to make him squirm away. “It was a compliment!” Michael squawked  in his own defense, hand coming up to defend his ribs. 

“I’m ordering takeout,” Calum said, changing the subject. “I don’t feel like cooking. And no pizza this time,” he directed at Michael with a look. 

Luke just shifted on Ashton’s lap, drawing his attention back to him. “You do look good, Ash.”

“Yeah,” he said. Swallowed. Continued. “Thanks.”

Luke just gave him a smile that had no right being as soft or as loving as it was. The strange ache in his chest was back full force, longing for something he couldn’t have, accompanied by his heart fluttering, trapped in a too-small cage and begging for release. “You’re welcome.”

*********

His respite is short, and a little less than sweet. Calum sat next to him on the couch, maybe two days after the makeup incident. “What are we watching?”

“I don’t know,” Ashton said, looking up from his phone to look at the TV. “It looks like the Avengers. I’m not really watching, if you want to change it.” He dropped the remote into Calum’s lap, attention going back to his phone. He had his suspicions about what this was, Calum coming to talk to him about ‘whatever had been going on with him lately’, the same way Ashton always did whenever one of the others was upset. He didn’t like seeing his role from the other side, didn’t want to be comforted or talk about it. He was fine, perfectly fucking fine, even if his chest ached sometimes in a way he couldn’t name (wouldn’t name, didn’t want the j word to ring true even in his own mind), especially when he felt like the others were in on some fucking secret he wasn’t, like the other day with Luke, in Calum’s lap.

He realized he’d stiffened at some point when Calum wrapped an arm around his shoulders, tugging him into his side, rubbing at his shoulder and arm like he was trying to comfort him. Ashton really didn’t want to be comforted, didn’t need it, he was a fully functional adult who absolutely wasn’t bothered. Calum was unrelenting though, rubbing little circles onto Ashton’s shoulder with his thumb, not broaching the subject, knowing Ashton wouldn’t want to talk about it from years of friendship and experience. It hung in the air, though, tangible and almost heavy, a weight that reminded him of the same tightness he often felt wrapped around his lungs that only loosened slightly when he was with Luke - or, he supposed, if he’d actually talk about it. Like Luke was a breath of fresh air, and he was a drowning man who’d just gotten his head above water, breathing in deep and not caring about the salty water that burned on the way down. 

And maybe that was alright, because Calum was warm, and comfortable. He’d leaned his head on him at some point, pillowed against Calum’s thick hoodie covered shoulder. And if he fell asleep there, warm and comforted, lulled to peace and relaxation by the steady in and out of Calum's breathing, and his heartbeat, and the familiar smell of his Calvin Klein cologne, then that was okay, too.  

If Luke came in an hour later, fingers tangled with Michael’s, and eyes burning bright with some unnameable emotion, some new fire in his soul, looking at Ashton like he was daring him - begging him - to understand him, then maybe that was made just a little more bearable by the comforting, unmoving weight of Calum’s arm around his shoulders.

***********

Ashton’s a little later getting home, having to make the grocery run alone because the others had been busy. He finished putting them away - really, did Michael have to leave fucking cereal all over the counter? Clean the fuck up - before wandering into the living room in search of the guys. He was expecting them to be all sprawled out on the couches, taking up as much space as humanly possible while keeping some sort of contact with each other, the way they normally did.

He was not expecting them to have yanked a shit ton of blankets and pillows onto the floor to form a giant nest, all snuggled in together like they’d done a few times when they were younger. Before they’d all grown up and moved past the phase where cuddling in together in a giant pile felt completely natural, and no one was that bothered by the others’ morning wood and Michael’s incessant dick jokes. Looking at them now, though, Ashton couldn’t help but wonder if he was the only one that had grown past that. He’d thought it had been a natural shift, all of them growing up and out of it. Maybe they’d just slowly started leaving him out of it.

Luke seemed awfully comfortable with his head on Calum’s chest, fingers laced together with Michael’s, their hands laying on Calum’s stomach. Michael, on Calum’s other side, definitely seemed comfortable, both of his arms wrapped around Calum and Luke, face pressed in against Calum’s left shoulder, several steps above where Ashton had been with him a few days prior in terms of intimacy.

For the first time since he’d gotten used to being in the band, being included - since the other three had assured him they cared about him, and he was part of them - he felt like he’d stumbled in on something private, something secret, something not for his viewing. The feeling was only solidified when Luke laughed at something on screen, turning to press his smile into Calum’s chest, eyes coming up to meet Calum’s with nothing but love shining bright. Nothing like the smoldering fire he’d had when he’d looked at Ashton the other day.

None of them had noticed him yet, making it easy to turn tell and head back to the safety of his bedroom. It wasn’t easy to forget how happy, how peaceful they’d all looked. Calum’s hand carding through Luke’s curls like he wasn’t thinking about it, Michael brushing his thumb over Luke’s knuckles, half asleep on Calum’s shoulder, the absolute love and adoration in Luke’s eyes.

And Ashton didn’t get it. Didn’t know when they’d started this back up again, didn’t know why he hadn’t been included. If he wanted to be included. How long had they been doing that again? How long had they been waiting for Ashton to leave so they could all curl up together without having to worry about him catching them, ruining it somehow? The thought of that was enough to fuck up anything else. He’d thought they were a team, close as a group as well as individually. He guessed he was wrong, though, if they felt the need to tiptoe around him the way they were. How long? How long had they been wanting to avoid him, for stolen moments together?

The thought was enough to bring that tightness back, curling up and around his lungs, cutting off his breath so every inhale feels sharp and heady. His heart was still caught in its cage, too small, too painful, each staccato beat catching him off guard, pounding loud and heavy in his ears in the suffocating silence of the empty room. Bathed in shadow and darkness, he didn’t bother turning on the light, preferring to avoid the harshness, preferring to not have to think too much beyond the moment.

If Ashton spent the rest of his evening wrapped up in his covers, lights staying off, in pseudo approximation of sleep, then no one had to know. And if he got himself off, hand around himself in the cover of darkness, with Luke’s name on his lips, mind chasing could-have-beens, memory somewhere in that night of Almost, hatred for himself potent in every movement of his body, then no one had to know.

********

He managed to make it almost a week, creeping around the other guys so he’s not caught with them in one place for too long. He could see the worry in their eyes, in the way Calum’s gaze shifts to Luke, or Michael, any time they’re all together for a moment, in the crease of his brow and the small tilt of his head. Calum had mastered silent communication years ago, and Ashton refused to remember that it had originally been for the two of them, exasperated sometimes with Michael picking on Luke, or someone asking them a stupid question. So it was a new kind of pain to see that being used against him.

His luck didn’t last long, though, before Calum caught him by the arm, concerned frown on his face. “Okay, what is going on with you?” He asked, leaving little room for the caginess Ashton had been favouring lately. As Ashton opened his mouth to reply, Calum spoke again. “And don’t you dare say nothing, you’ve been avoiding us for a week. That isn’t normal. Not for you.” 

Ashton deliberated for a moment on whether he wanted to be honest. In the end, Calum’s earnest, worried face is what tipped the scales for him, and he decided on replying with candor. “I saw you guys, a week ago.” Calum’s frown deepened, and Ashton felt the now-familiar twist in his gut. “I figured you wanted some time to yourselves, since you seemed like you were awfully comfortable doing that.” 

“Ashton-”

“And like a week before that, I thought Luke wanted to fuck me and then he left and wouldn’t talk to me after, and then started fucking kissing you guys and still wouldn’t talk about it. So I really don’t know what’s going on with you guys, but it’s pretty fucking clear I’m not invited.” He didn’t know what possessed him to blurt the rest of it out, but it was too late now, anyway. And the tightness around his chest, like someone had wrapped saran wrap around his chest as tight as they could, constricting everything in the worst possible way, loosened just a bit with his words. So maybe it was just that little bit worth it, even as Calum chewed on his lower lip in thought.

“You are invited,” he finally said, and what the fuck was that supposed to mean? Ashton didn’t get the chance to ask before Calum was taking his arm again and pulling him down the hall to Michael’s room.

“Calum, what the fuck-” was all Ashton managed to get out before Calum was knocking on the door and letting them in. 

Michael was sprawled out on his stomach, feet on his pillow at the head of the bed, scrolling on his phone. Luke was next to him, leaning against the wall, also distracted by his phone. They looked up immediately when Calum dragged Ashton in.

“We have to tell him,” Calum said, gaze shifting from Luke to Michael and back again. “He saw us cuddling and thought we didn’t want him around.” He looked at Luke. “And he thinks you don’t like him, or don’t want him, after you started whatever that was and stopped.”

Ashton was...fucking confused, to say the least. What the fuck was going on? Why did Luke look all guilty? And seriously, what the fuck did Calum want them to tell him? God, if they were all fucking, he was quitting the band.

“We’re all….together,” Luke said, words slow and methodical like he was actually trying to think about what he was saying, stringing words together carefully so he made sense, which wasn’t always his strong suit. Ashton had to translate for him, sometimes, when they were talking to someone else. It was strange to be on the receiving end. “Kind of. Um. And that night- well, I like you- we like you- so I was trying to figure out how to tell you.” Luke flushed, light pink dusting his cheeks, slightly tan from the summer sun. “But then you started asking questions, and I didn’t know how to answer any of them, and I panicked.”

Michael’s hand moved to take Luke’s, fingers lacing together like it was the most natural thing in the world. And for them, it probably was. They’d been doing this for god knew how long, tiptoeing around Ashton carefully so they wouldn’t have to explain. And sure, maybe Ashton didn’t entirely get it yet, and had too many questions, but wasn’t that to be expected, since he was the last to join? They already had an idea of how they worked as...a slightly more romantic relationship, or whatever they were. Ashton didn’t. The constricting tightness was back, not as bad now, but very prevalent in the face of realizing that he was right, he had intentionally been left out. It felt like a straight jacket, restricting his movements and keeping him stuck in place, Calum’s hand still warm where it held his arm, his mind moving a few paces slower than he would have liked. His breathing, at least, felt a little steadier, a little more even, even if each one felt strange through the tightness of his imaginary straight jacket.

“You’re all...together?” Ashton finally managed to get out, the three others looking at him expectantly, waiting on his answer. His gaze lingered on Luke’s nervous face. He didn’t want to make him feel nervous, wanted to wipe the nerves from his face and console him until he felt better, wrapped up in Ashton’s arms like they’d done before this whole mess started. “Dating?”

Michael looked at Calum uneasily, like the answer was written on his forehead. In reality, they were just doing Calum’s silent communication thing. “We...haven’t really talked about it like that,” he said, just as slowly as Luke. “But, uh. Yeah. I guess. We’re all exclusive, and just like each other. We haven’t told anyone yet, and were trying to...well, we were trying to figure out how to tell you and ask you to join.”

“Which was what Luke was doing,” Calum added, even though Luke had already explained that part. Although, what they hadn’t explained was-

“How did you all start?” Ashton asked. If it was so hard to tell him, then how had it started for the other three? He didn’t imagine it was easy.

Luke flushed darker at that, shrinking down a little in place. Calum was the one who actually answered. “I walked in on Michael and Luke kissing. Then we sort of talked about it, and figured out we all liked each other. Then one thing led to another and...here we are.”

“He’d said he wanted experience.” Michael was pink, too, Ashton noted. Interesting.

“Why didn’t anyone tell me after that? If you all like me.” Ashton really didn’t know why he felt so hurt by it. It wasn’t like he wanted in on whatever this was, was it? Sure, he’d thought about it a couple times, but it wasn’t like he’d ever thought it was a possibility. Now that it was...he was surprised to find that dating his three best friends really didn’t sound as strange as he would’ve expected. “How long has this been going on?”

“About a month or two.” Calum answered the easier question first. Ashton really couldn’t fault him for it, but he really wanted an answer to his first question. The straight jacket tightened a little, imagining the people he was closest to, the people he trusted with his life, tiptoeing around him to avoid telling him about the love and comfort they’d found in each other. He knew it was imaginary, but he could almost feel the burn of the salt water in his throat with the way his breathing felt shallow. He knew it wasn’t real, was just that tightness that happened now, but it didn’t make it any less shitty; like his bandmates had all figured out how they fit together, a three piece puzzle with no need for a fourth, an extra piece in the box, meant to go to another, but now was void of purpose.

“We just didn’t know how to tell you, Ashy.” Luke took the harder question, softness in his eyes and in his voice. “We love you. We just...fell into this. We didn’t know how to do it deliberately. We didn’t- I didn’t know if you liked us - me - back. We didn’t want you to quit the band or hate us for it.”

That made it worse, jacket tightening a little around his heart, squeezing in sympathy to the worry he could see in Luke’s face, mirrored by the other two. He didn’t want them to worry about his reactions like that. “I’d never hate you. Any of you.” His lips pulled down, into a frown, gaze falling heavy on each of their faces for a moment. “You could’ve told me.” He took as deep a breath as he could manage, the straight jacket not wanting him to have even a moment of respite, slowly becoming a tangible weight around his chest. “I...want in. I do like you all back. I might just need a bit to get used to having three-”

Luke’s face broke into a bright grin, happiness exuding from his entire body. He shifted over to extend a hand to Ashton. “This calls for a group cuddle.”

Michael laughed, the sentiment echoed by Calum, still at Ashton’s side. Calum’s hand had slid from his arm to slide into his own at some point, so Calum squeezed it before letting go so he could nudge Ashton forward gently, until he reached the bed. He took Luke’s still outstretched hand, Michael rolling over so Luke could tug him to lay down on the bed. Calum pressed in along his left side, Luke taking his right, pressing along the length of his body, head resting on his chest. Micheal scooted in to smush against Luke’s back, hand creeping over Luke’s side to find Ashton’s hand. It was like they knew he needed the extra reassurance, the help to adjust to the new relationship.

“We can talk everything over in the morning,” Calum murmured, like he knew Ashton’s mind was running away from him, thoughts piling in on themselves so fast he couldn’t keep up. And he probably did, he’d known Ashton long enough to know how he worked. And that fact - and being beneath the warm pile of boys he loved with his whole heart - was comforting.

As Ashton felt himself grow sleepy, he realized the tightness in his chest was gone, for the first time in weeks. It was replaced, now, with the comforting weight of Calum’s arms around him, Luke’s head on his chest, Michael’s hand in his resting on his stomach. He took a deep breath, reveling in the fact that he could freely, now, and let himself drift off, his boys - his boyfriends - around him, calm and refreshing, like a fresh breath of air after so long without,

No one is entirely sure who starts it, but all bets are on Luke. It’s only noticeable once it becomes a Thing. When Luke leans in to press a quick kiss to whoever’s cheek is closest any time he has to leave. It gets extra noticeable when they all start leaning into it. 

It remains just that, an unspoken Thing that none of them broach, left alone and quiet so no one really has to think about the implications or what it means.That was, of course, until Michael decided he was going to go against the unspoken rule, and bring it up when they’re clustered in the kitchen. Minus Luke, who was off doing god knows what. 

“Luke’s been extra clingy lately,” Michael started, gaze shifting from Calum to Ashton and back again. His tone was conversational, but it was clear - to Ashton, at least - that he was trying to go somewhere with it. Trying to push for information. He was perched on the counter, legs swinging in the very I’m-not-always-aware-of-what-my-body-is-doing sort of way that was very Michael. 

Calum sipped his coffee, letting out a hum. “He’s always clingy.” It seemed like Calum wanted to talk about it about as much as Ashton did. 

“Okay, yeah, but he kissed you this morning,” Michael pointed out, like it meant something. And maybe it did, Ashton just really didn’t want to think about it. He liked the dynamics they had. Questioning anything Luke did was just a good way to get confused; he rarely knew what he was doing enough to explain it to others, figuring out his logic was complicated in its own right. 

“He did,” Calum agreed, sly smile coming onto his face. It had only been a kiss on the cheek, no cause for alarm. But, for Ashton, it was still very much cause for alarm. Maybe.  “Are you jealous?”

Michael started, expression shifting into the annoyed scowl he’d perfected years ago. “No! I’m just- I just meant he’s been weirdly clingy lately. Fuck off, Cal.”

Ashton snorted at that, unable to help himself. “You sound jealous.” He didn’t like stoking the fire of Michael’s annoyance - or continuing pointless arguments - but it was easier than the subject matter at hand. He didn’t want to think about the way his stomach twisted at the thought of Luke kissing all of them the way he was, didn’t want to understand what or why he was feeling. 

“Fuck off,” was Michael’s eloquent response, leaning back against the wall, swinging his legs again, so his heels hit against the cabinets below in time with Ashton’s rapid heartbeat. Bump bump. Bump bump. At least his heartbeat wasn’t scuffing the paint.

“Seriously,” Michael said, leaning forward a little, fringe in his eyes. Ashton didn’t brush it out this time the way he normally did, hand staying firmly on his mug of coffee. “What’s up with him?”

“I think he’s just lonely or something, Mikey,” Calum consoled, taking over the position of peacemaker in Ashton’s determined silence. “Either that or he’s got a crush on you.” He poked at Michael’s thigh, trying to keep things lighthearted. 

Michael squirmed over slightly with a laugh. “Fuck off,” he said, for the third time since they’d gathered in the kitchen twenty minutes ago, long enough to brew a pot of coffee and have uncomfortable conversations. “No, really. I don’t think he does. He’s doing it to all of us. You and Ashton included.” His gaze flickered over to Ashton. So he really did want to talk about it. 

“Okay, and?” Calum glanced over at Ashton before back to Michael. “What about it?”

“It’s weird, that’s what.” Michael leaned back against the upper cabinets again, head hitting them with a soft thunk. “He didn’t always do that.”

Ashton wasn’t listening so much anymore. He sipped his coffee, gaze somewhere on the cabinets above Michael’s brightly dyed hair. He was distracted, caught up in his own thoughts, memories of a few weeks ago before this all started. Nimble fingers tugging at his shirt buttons, laughter lost against his lips when they’d stumbled, teeth catching his lower lip, blonde curls silky between his fingers when he’d reached out and tugged. It hadn’t gotten far - not near as far as they’d anticipated - they’d been too sober for it to seem anything but too comfortable. It had been Ashton to voice his concerns first - should we be doing this, is this okay, what if the others find out - and Luke had pulled back, disappointment in his eyes like he’d expected it to be easy. He still remembered just how cold his sheets had felt, empty and bare the way they had been since that night. No late night Luke crawling in because he got lonely and needed company, or because he had a bad dream and needed consolation, or because he wanted to talk about his dreams for the band, for them, and Ashton was always willing to listen. 

Ashton drained his coffee mug and set it into the sink maybe a little harder than he should have, deciding he didn’t want to be part of the conversation, and turned to leave the kitchen. The last thing he caught was Michael’s “Fuck, what’s gotten into him?”

*****

It doesn’t get brought up for a few days, giving Ashton a short but sweet respite from having to think about the unhappiness simmering in the pit of his stomach, the way it twisted whenever he caught Luke kissing the other two, something a little too close to jealousy for his comfort, even if Ashton determinedly didn’t think about it, or which way it went.

Luke settled himself into Calum’s lap on the couch, ruining whatever game he’d been trying to play against Michael. “Come on, that’s cheating!” Calum laughed, hands abandoning the controller to drop to Luke’s waist, anyway, trying to look around him at the screen. 

“All’s fair in love and war,” Michael sang triumphantly, grin on his face as he crossed the finish line in Mario Kart, tossing his controller down to do a victory dance that was more an aborted flail of his limbs, shimmying a little in place, complete with sticking his tongue out in the most mature display of bragging Michael was capable of.

“This isn’t love or war,” Calum pointed out, though he didn’t look too put out that he’d lost, anyway. 

“What are you talking about? Mario Kart counts as war,” Michael said, at the same time Luke said “it might be love.”

And that got everyone’s attention, three pairs of eyes snapping up to Luke’s face almost instantly.. “What did you say?” Ashton finally spoke up from where he was sitting in the armchair, glancing up from his phone screen in time to watch Luke turn pink. The kind of pink that reminded him of when it got cold and Luke refused to wear a jacket, just so he could steal Ashton’s, or Calum’s or Michael’s. His nose just wasn’t pink, now, but the colour of his face certainly made up for that.

Luke was the most attention-driven of the four of them - though Calum certainly didn’t mind it at all, most of the time - so him blushing was a little bit strange. Which was only confounded by his equally strange response. “I didn’t say anything,” he said, clearly avoiding the question. “Maybe we should order pizza.”

“Fuck yeah,” Michael said, easily bought and distracted. 

“Wait-“ Ashton said, trying to ask again. 

“You heard him,” Calum said with a grin, squeezing Luke’s hips just to make him shift on his lap and laugh. “He said he loooooooves us.” His hands creeped up to poke at his sides. 

“Cal! Stop!” Luke managed to get through his giggles, as Calum started actively tickling his sides. 

Ashton just frowned a little bit, sinking further into the chair. When Michael wanted to talk about complicated things, they all had to comply. But, apparently, not when Ashton did. What was going on with the three of them, anyway? Hadn’t the tickle fights been abandoned in grade school? He didn’t want to think about the now-familiar twist in his gut. It was forming into something tangible, too, shifting and morphing to be accompanied by an ache in his chest that, if he were any more poetic, he would insist was a hole in his heart. A very Luke shaped hole. Or, more precisely, a more uncomplicated version of his band shaped hole, back when he didn’t have to think about things too much, or when he didn’t feel that awful ache when Calum had his hands up on Luke like that, Michael moving in to poke at him from the side. He wasn’t sure they’d ever fully been like this, though. Years of living in close quarters had blurred ang boundaries they may have had at one point. Ashton seemed to be the only one that had any left. 

And that, too, was its own form of miserable, feeling constantly like he was on the outside, looking in, unable to participate. The ache was back now, full force, and he pulled his gaze to the TV, even though he really wasn’t paying attention to anything anymore. He hated this feeling, hated feeling like the last one in on a joke, or like he was always the one dragging his feet. It went along with being the reasonable one, though, and he couldn’t abandon that, or Luke would try and microwave eggs again and they’d burn the whole place down. 

“Ashton,” Michael finally said, face flushed and words breathless, nothing but happiness in his eyes. “Can you order the pizza?”

And, just once, Ashton really hated being the reasonable one.

*******

“You have to stay still,” Luke chastised, still perched carefully in his lap. He’d insisted on doing Ashton’s makeup - though he really wasn’t sure how much of an expert Luke was on it to begin with - and as soon as he’d agreed, albeit slightly reluctantly, Luke had been climbing into his lap, eyeliner in hand. It seemed like he already knew what he wanted to do. 

“I’m not the one moving around.” And he was pretty sure about that. His hands were still on Luke’s hips, trying to hold him steady and keep from wobbling around. 

“Yeah, you are.” Luke’s breath was warm on his cheek, comforting in a way he wouldn’t have expected from someone who forgot to brush his teeth way too often when he was younger. He hadn’t been this close to Luke since that night, a week and a half ago, when Luke had given him that look with enough hurt to shatter his soul, and left before he could put it back together again. 

“Whatever you say.” It was easier than continuing to argue, or coming up with a well considered reply. Luke’s fingers, too, were just as warm, one hand holding his jaw to keep his head tilted up, like he needed the constant reminder, the knuckles of his other hand brushing his cheek as he worked on Ashton’s winged liner. He was reminded of those same fingers brushing against more of his bare chest with every button that opened, the way Luke felt laughing into their kiss, head tipped down slightly to meet his, eyelashes brushing Ashton’s cheek when he tipped his head just a little too far as they maneuvered to the bed. He could feel the rhythmic in and out of his breathing, his heartbeat steady in its cage, too, because of how close they were now, Luke leaning over him, knees bracketing Ashton’s hips, lower legs pressed warm and steady against Ashton’s thighs. 

Luke didn’t reply, for once seeming to prefer the silence, and leaned forward instead, switching his focus to the other eye. With no noise between them, other than the sound of their breathing, all Ashton could really focus on was the sound of his own heartbeat, thudding a too-fast rhythm in his chest like he was at his drum kit working out his emotions, letting the steady thud of his bass drum drown out anything else he could be thinking about. And, god, he wished he was there now, instead of here, fingers a little lower than they should be, thoughts flickering between Luke and his unending warmth and presence, and the other guys in the band, and what they would do if they walked in to see Luke in his lap, so close Ashton could feel his breath, smell the blue jolly rancher he’d had in his mouth before he’d started this whole thing. It was too complicated, too many things to focus on at once, and he was trying to keep his mind in one place. It just wasn’t working very well. 

“There,” Luke said at last, letting go of his eye and pulling back. “Now you just need lipstick.”

Ashton opened his eyes, immediately preparing to argue. “Wait, I thought you said-“

“I said I was doing your makeup. Makeup includes lipstick,” Luke cut him off, having seemingly expected Ashton’s trepidation. 

He leaned over and grabbed the tube of lipstick before leaning over him again. “Open your mouth a little,” he instructed, opening the lipstick and slowly starting to apply it once Ashton obeyed him. His hands were surprisingly steady, now, no hint of the nervous tremor he had sometimes in interviews, hand slipping soundlessly into Ashton’s underneath the table where no one could see. Not that it really mattered if they did, but people could be unkind, and they didn’t need any more rumors about their band. Not after the one about Michael and Calum sleeping together - or, worse, the one where all of them had been. 

As far as rumors went, it wasn’t the worst. It didn’t bring good things for the band, though, not with social stigma being the way it was. But it wasn’t the worst thought, being with the three guys. They were his closest friends, and the people he trusted with his life. And it was absolutely, without a doubt, leagues about the rumor where he had been a cheater. He hadn’t had a girlfriend, or a partner, or anyone, but someone had run a story flat out saying he’d cheated on some girl. That had taken a lot of fixing, and no one had been pleased. He remembered how angry Michael had been on his behalf, threatening to call the publisher and ‘give them a piece of his mind’, Luke having already taken the position of comforting Ashton, sliding his hand into his to give him something to hold. He hadn’t been that broken up about it, honestly, but it had been touching, the way they all came together to try and help. He still remembered Calum pulling him aside later, hand on his shoulder and concerned frown that he wore so well already on his face, asking if he was okay or if he needed a hug, and that he would get one anyway. And yeah, if he had to date more than one person, they’d probably be a good choice. 

“Done!” Luke announced, smiling a little. He shifted back on Ashton’s thighs to inspect his work, head tilting to the right, when Calum and Michael came in. 

“Honey, I’m home!” Michael called as he walked in, laughing slightly to himself afterward. Calum just rolled his eyes fondly as they stepped across the doorframe, both pausing a little in place as they caught sight of Luke and Ashton. 

“Whoa.” Michael was the first to speak. “You look good, Ash. Got a hot date later?”

“Yeah,” Ashton replied, getting over his momentary shock of being walked in on with Luke still in his lap, hands just a little too tight on his hips. “With your mum.”

Michael snorted, but it earned him an actual laugh from Calum. “You do look good. The lipstick looks nice. And I like the little heart on your cheekbone.” He tapped a finger against his own face, presumably where the heart was on Ashton’s. 

“You added a heart?” Ashton asked. That explained what he’d been doing there, then. 

Luke shrugged. “It looks cute.”

“It does look cute. You look ready to do a little dance for us, Ash,” Michael continued, ever the supportive friend. “Could always toss on a skirt.” He sounded less cutting and more intrigued than he was probably aiming for. Calum just gave him a look and, since he was closest, poked him in the ribs to make him squirm away. “It was a compliment!” Michael squawked  in his own defense, hand coming up to defend his ribs. 

“I’m ordering takeout,” Calum said, changing the subject. “I don’t feel like cooking. And no pizza this time,” he directed at Michael with a look. 

Luke just shifted on Ashton’s lap, drawing his attention back to him. “You do look good, Ash.”

“Yeah,” he said. Swallowed. Continued. “Thanks.”

Luke just gave him a smile that had no right being as soft or as loving as it was. The strange ache in his chest was back full force, longing for something he couldn’t have, accompanied by his heart fluttering, trapped in a too-small cage and begging for release. “You’re welcome.”

*********

His respite is short, and a little less than sweet. Calum sat next to him on the couch, maybe two days after the makeup incident. “What are we watching?”

“I don’t know,” Ashton said, looking up from his phone to look at the TV. “It looks like the Avengers. I’m not really watching, if you want to change it.” He dropped the remote into Calum’s lap, attention going back to his phone. He had his suspicions about what this was, Calum coming to talk to him about ‘whatever had been going on with him lately’, the same way Ashton always did whenever one of the others was upset. He didn’t like seeing his role from the other side, didn’t want to be comforted or talk about it. He was fine, perfectly fucking fine, even if his chest ached sometimes in a way he couldn’t name (wouldn’t name, didn’t want the j word to ring true even in his own mind), especially when he felt like the others were in on some fucking secret he wasn’t, like the other day with Luke, in Calum’s lap.

He realized he’d stiffened at some point when Calum wrapped an arm around his shoulders, tugging him into his side, rubbing at his shoulder and arm like he was trying to comfort him. Ashton really didn’t want to be comforted, didn’t need it, he was a fully functional adult who absolutely wasn’t bothered. Calum was unrelenting though, rubbing little circles onto Ashton’s shoulder with his thumb, not broaching the subject, knowing Ashton wouldn’t want to talk about it from years of friendship and experience. It hung in the air, though, tangible and almost heavy, a weight that reminded him of the same tightness he often felt wrapped around his lungs that only loosened slightly when he was with Luke - or, he supposed, if he’d actually talk about it. Like Luke was a breath of fresh air, and he was a drowning man who’d just gotten his head above water, breathing in deep and not caring about the salty water that burned on the way down. 

And maybe that was alright, because Calum was warm, and comfortable. He’d leaned his head on him at some point, pillowed against Calum’s thick hoodie covered shoulder. And if he fell asleep there, warm and comforted, lulled to peace and relaxation by the steady in and out of Calum's breathing, and his heartbeat, and the familiar smell of his Calvin Klein cologne, then that was okay, too.  

If Luke came in an hour later, fingers tangled with Michael’s, and eyes burning bright with some unnameable emotion, some new fire in his soul, looking at Ashton like he was daring him - begging him - to understand him, then maybe that was made just a little more bearable by the comforting, unmoving weight of Calum’s arm around his shoulders.

***********

Ashton’s a little later getting home, having to make the grocery run alone because the others had been busy. He finished putting them away - really, did Michael have to leave fucking cereal all over the counter? Clean the fuck up - before wandering into the living room in search of the guys. He was expecting them to be all sprawled out on the couches, taking up as much space as humanly possible while keeping some sort of contact with each other, the way they normally did.

He was not expecting them to have yanked a shit ton of blankets and pillows onto the floor to form a giant nest, all snuggled in together like they’d done a few times when they were younger. Before they’d all grown up and moved past the phase where cuddling in together in a giant pile felt completely natural, and no one was that bothered by the others’ morning wood and Michael’s incessant dick jokes. Looking at them now, though, Ashton couldn’t help but wonder if he was the only one that had grown past that. He’d thought it had been a natural shift, all of them growing up and out of it. Maybe they’d just slowly started leaving him out of it.

Luke seemed awfully comfortable with his head on Calum’s chest, fingers laced together with Michael’s, their hands laying on Calum’s stomach. Michael, on Calum’s other side, definitely seemed comfortable, both of his arms wrapped around Calum and Luke, face pressed in against Calum’s left shoulder, several steps above where Ashton had been with him a few days prior in terms of intimacy.

For the first time since he’d gotten used to being in the band, being included - since the other three had assured him they cared about him, and he was part of them - he felt like he’d stumbled in on something private, something secret, something not for his viewing. The feeling was only solidified when Luke laughed at something on screen, turning to press his smile into Calum’s chest, eyes coming up to meet Calum’s with nothing but love shining bright. Nothing like the smoldering fire he’d had when he’d looked at Ashton the other day.

None of them had noticed him yet, making it easy to turn tell and head back to the safety of his bedroom. It wasn’t easy to forget how happy, how peaceful they’d all looked. Calum’s hand carding through Luke’s curls like he wasn’t thinking about it, Michael brushing his thumb over Luke’s knuckles, half asleep on Calum’s shoulder, the absolute love and adoration in Luke’s eyes.

And Ashton didn’t get it. Didn’t know when they’d started this back up again, didn’t know why he hadn’t been included. If he wanted to be included. How long had they been doing that again? How long had they been waiting for Ashton to leave so they could all curl up together without having to worry about him catching them, ruining it somehow? The thought of that was enough to fuck up anything else. He’d thought they were a team, close as a group as well as individually. He guessed he was wrong, though, if they felt the need to tiptoe around him the way they were. How long? How long had they been wanting to avoid him, for stolen moments together?

The thought was enough to bring that tightness back, curling up and around his lungs, cutting off his breath so every inhale feels sharp and heady. His heart was still caught in its cage, too small, too painful, each staccato beat catching him off guard, pounding loud and heavy in his ears in the suffocating silence of the empty room. Bathed in shadow and darkness, he didn’t bother turning on the light, preferring to avoid the harshness, preferring to not have to think too much beyond the moment.

If Ashton spent the rest of his evening wrapped up in his covers, lights staying off, in pseudo approximation of sleep, then no one had to know. And if he got himself off, hand around himself in the cover of darkness, with Luke’s name on his lips, mind chasing could-have-beens, memory somewhere in that night of Almost, hatred for himself potent in every movement of his body, then no one had to know.

********

He managed to make it almost a week, creeping around the other guys so he’s not caught with them in one place for too long. He could see the worry in their eyes, in the way Calum’s gaze shifts to Luke, or Michael, any time they’re all together for a moment, in the crease of his brow and the small tilt of his head. Calum had mastered silent communication years ago, and Ashton refused to remember that it had originally been for the two of them, exasperated sometimes with Michael picking on Luke, or someone asking them a stupid question. So it was a new kind of pain to see that being used against him.

His luck didn’t last long, though, before Calum caught him by the arm, concerned frown on his face. “Okay, what is going on with you?” He asked, leaving little room for the caginess Ashton had been favouring lately. As Ashton opened his mouth to reply, Calum spoke again. “And don’t you dare say nothing, you’ve been avoiding us for a week. That isn’t normal. Not for you.” 

Ashton deliberated for a moment on whether he wanted to be honest. In the end, Calum’s earnest, worried face is what tipped the scales for him, and he decided on replying with candor. “I saw you guys, a week ago.” Calum’s frown deepened, and Ashton felt the now-familiar twist in his gut. “I figured you wanted some time to yourselves, since you seemed like you were awfully comfortable doing that.” 

“Ashton-”

“And like a week before that, I thought Luke wanted to fuck me and then he left and wouldn’t talk to me after, and then started fucking kissing you guys and still wouldn’t talk about it. So I really don’t know what’s going on with you guys, but it’s pretty fucking clear I’m not invited.” He didn’t know what possessed him to blurt the rest of it out, but it was too late now, anyway. And the tightness around his chest, like someone had wrapped saran wrap around his chest as tight as they could, constricting everything in the worst possible way, loosened just a bit with his words. So maybe it was just that little bit worth it, even as Calum chewed on his lower lip in thought.

“You are invited,” he finally said, and what the fuck was that supposed to mean? Ashton didn’t get the chance to ask before Calum was taking his arm again and pulling him down the hall to Michael’s room.

“Calum, what the fuck-” was all Ashton managed to get out before Calum was knocking on the door and letting them in. 

Michael was sprawled out on his stomach, feet on his pillow at the head of the bed, scrolling on his phone. Luke was next to him, leaning against the wall, also distracted by his phone. They looked up immediately when Calum dragged Ashton in.

“We have to tell him,” Calum said, gaze shifting from Luke to Michael and back again. “He saw us cuddling and thought we didn’t want him around.” He looked at Luke. “And he thinks you don’t like him, or don’t want him, after you started whatever that was and stopped.”

Ashton was...fucking confused, to say the least. What the fuck was going on? Why did Luke look all guilty? And seriously, what the fuck did Calum want them to tell him? God, if they were all fucking, he was quitting the band.

“We’re all….together,” Luke said, words slow and methodical like he was actually trying to think about what he was saying, stringing words together carefully so he made sense, which wasn’t always his strong suit. Ashton had to translate for him, sometimes, when they were talking to someone else. It was strange to be on the receiving end. “Kind of. Um. And that night- well, I like you- we like you- so I was trying to figure out how to tell you.” Luke flushed, light pink dusting his cheeks, slightly tan from the summer sun. “But then you started asking questions, and I didn’t know how to answer any of them, and I panicked.”

Michael’s hand moved to take Luke’s, fingers lacing together like it was the most natural thing in the world. And for them, it probably was. They’d been doing this for god knew how long, tiptoeing around Ashton carefully so they wouldn’t have to explain. And sure, maybe Ashton didn’t entirely get it yet, and had too many questions, but wasn’t that to be expected, since he was the last to join? They already had an idea of how they worked as...a slightly more romantic relationship, or whatever they were. Ashton didn’t. The constricting tightness was back, not as bad now, but very prevalent in the face of realizing that he was right, he had intentionally been left out. It felt like a straight jacket, restricting his movements and keeping him stuck in place, Calum’s hand still warm where it held his arm, his mind moving a few paces slower than he would have liked. His breathing, at least, felt a little steadier, a little more even, even if each one felt strange through the tightness of his imaginary straight jacket.

“You’re all...together?” Ashton finally managed to get out, the three others looking at him expectantly, waiting on his answer. His gaze lingered on Luke’s nervous face. He didn’t want to make him feel nervous, wanted to wipe the nerves from his face and console him until he felt better, wrapped up in Ashton’s arms like they’d done before this whole mess started. “Dating?”

Michael looked at Calum uneasily, like the answer was written on his forehead. In reality, they were just doing Calum’s silent communication thing. “We...haven’t really talked about it like that,” he said, just as slowly as Luke. “But, uh. Yeah. I guess. We’re all exclusive, and just like each other. We haven’t told anyone yet, and were trying to...well, we were trying to figure out how to tell you and ask you to join.”

“Which was what Luke was doing,” Calum added, even though Luke had already explained that part. Although, what they hadn’t explained was-

“How did you all start?” Ashton asked. If it was so hard to tell him, then how had it started for the other three? He didn’t imagine it was easy.

Luke flushed darker at that, shrinking down a little in place. Calum was the one who actually answered. “I walked in on Michael and Luke kissing. Then we sort of talked about it, and figured out we all liked each other. Then one thing led to another and...here we are.”

“He’d said he wanted experience.” Michael was pink, too, Ashton noted. Interesting.

“Why didn’t anyone tell me after that? If you all like me.” Ashton really didn’t know why he felt so hurt by it. It wasn’t like he wanted in on whatever this was, was it? Sure, he’d thought about it a couple times, but it wasn’t like he’d ever thought it was a possibility. Now that it was...he was surprised to find that dating his three best friends really didn’t sound as strange as he would’ve expected. “How long has this been going on?”

“About a month or two.” Calum answered the easier question first. Ashton really couldn’t fault him for it, but he really wanted an answer to his first question. The straight jacket tightened a little, imagining the people he was closest to, the people he trusted with his life, tiptoeing around him to avoid telling him about the love and comfort they’d found in each other. He knew it was imaginary, but he could almost feel the burn of the salt water in his throat with the way his breathing felt shallow. He knew it wasn’t real, was just that tightness that happened now, but it didn’t make it any less shitty; like his bandmates had all figured out how they fit together, a three piece puzzle with no need for a fourth, an extra piece in the box, meant to go to another, but now was void of purpose.

“We just didn’t know how to tell you, Ashy.” Luke took the harder question, softness in his eyes and in his voice. “We love you. We just...fell into this. We didn’t know how to do it deliberately. We didn’t- I didn’t know if you liked us - me - back. We didn’t want you to quit the band or hate us for it.”

That made it worse, jacket tightening a little around his heart, squeezing in sympathy to the worry he could see in Luke’s face, mirrored by the other two. He didn’t want them to worry about his reactions like that. “I’d never hate you. Any of you.” His lips pulled down, into a frown, gaze falling heavy on each of their faces for a moment. “You could’ve told me.” He took as deep a breath as he could manage, the straight jacket not wanting him to have even a moment of respite, slowly becoming a tangible weight around his chest. “I...want in. I do like you all back. I might just need a bit to get used to having three-”

Luke’s face broke into a bright grin, happiness exuding from his entire body. He shifted over to extend a hand to Ashton. “This calls for a group cuddle.”

Michael laughed, the sentiment echoed by Calum, still at Ashton’s side. Calum’s hand had slid from his arm to slide into his own at some point, so Calum squeezed it before letting go so he could nudge Ashton forward gently, until he reached the bed. He took Luke’s still outstretched hand, Michael rolling over so Luke could tug him to lay down on the bed. Calum pressed in along his left side, Luke taking his right, pressing along the length of his body, head resting on his chest. Micheal scooted in to smush against Luke’s back, hand creeping over Luke’s side to find Ashton’s hand. It was like they knew he needed the extra reassurance, the help to adjust to the new relationship.

“We can talk everything over in the morning,” Calum murmured, like he knew Ashton’s mind was running away from him, thoughts piling in on themselves so fast he couldn’t keep up. And he probably did, he’d known Ashton long enough to know how he worked. And that fact - and being beneath the warm pile of boys he loved with his whole heart - was comforting.

As Ashton felt himself grow sleepy, he realized the tightness in his chest was gone, for the first time in weeks. It was replaced, now, with the comforting weight of Calum’s arms around him, Luke’s head on his chest, Michael’s hand in his resting on his stomach. He took a deep breath, reveling in the fact that he could freely, now, and let himself drift off, his boys - his boyfriends - around him, calm and refreshing, like a fresh breath of air after so long without,

#ot4 #lashton #malum #luke hemmings fanfiction #ashton irwin fanfiction #calum hood fanfiction #michael clifford fanfiction #muke #cashton #its got it all babey ot4 is the way to go #my writing #new style on here n new themes am nervous

[domjaehyun]

alright i just finished qc2 and oml that was a rollercoaster ride. i was expecting jaehyun and mark but i was NOT expecting jaehyun and mark. the tension between the two, the glares... now when i say i loved every moment, i truly did. but i'd like to give a special shoutout to day 18. that really had me feeling a bit teary eyed. the way y/n and jaehyun silently worked their way into linking hands without really knowing what was going on. OMG AND JUNGWOO?! i don't even read smut for - 🍪 (1/2)

more under the cut!

for him but my god reading all the scenes with woo got to me. i'd like to mention jaemin and y/n's sex tape too. ik jaemin uses it to get off now. mark?! that boy INDEED got his world rocked. y/n did not HESITATE with him. it was hot. and don't even get me started on the ending. mark's sudden confession as he's leaving? but then johnny coming in and telling y/n that not only does jaehyun like her, but for two months now?! no wonder why he got so defensive about the nude thing and kept - 🍪 (2/3)

asking y/n to stay and that she was his. my mind was all over the place. but like johnny said, y/n cannot just hide from jaehyun forever. not to say i'm team jaehyun but well... HAHA. omg sorry i keep rambling bc there's so much i wanna talk about. like qc2 had a lot to unfold. in the beginning when jaehyun asked if he could finish inside y/n and took up his ENTIRE day just to get tested for STIs? a committed, horny man. but thank u for finishing!! i think the qc series is officially - 🍪 (3/4)

my favorite work of yours!! i'm anticipating the final part! i hope y/n makes the right choice for herself. but do not feel alarmed and take your time with it. i will patiently reread qc 1&2 over and over until the next. but since we're getting close to an end here, may i ask if there will be any action with jaemin, jungwoo, or johnny still? or bc we know jaehyun and mark have caught feelings, will we only exclusively get them? but i love you jizz! thank you for your hard work! - 🍪 (4/4)

LAST THING I SWEAR. when y/n let mark come over and jaehyun was exploding with jealousy (only for y/n to be a bit stupid oblivious), i thought jaehyun would've called up minhee again. BUT ALSO while i was trying to look back and find her name (LMAO) NOW I KNOW WHY JOHNNY KEPT GIVING ALL THOSE LOOKS. THAT BITCH KNEW ALL ALONG. that's why when y/n was like "no jae you already slept over the other night" and johnny said: 👀 or when they were bickering with each other while y/n stormed off - 🍪

i said i was done sending qc2 asks but after re-reading it a few more times, i just have to say y/n and jaehyun were made for each other. not even being biased or anything. i really like their dynamic. with mark, every thing was new and idk i wasn't feeling it. with jaehyun, there was hardly any hesitation to do things. also seeing jae go all softie this chapter tore my heart. idk what i'd do if him and y/n don't end up together. all love to mark tho, i'll take him if he isn't the one -🍪

okay im gonna answer this and im gonna try and go sentence by sentence because i wanna make sure i dont miss anything!!!

hehehe i hope you like rollercoasters otherwise this is n o t a compliment hdfjgsdfjk (i’m kidding) /i/ didnt even expect jaehyun and mark in the way that i wrote them to be quite honest with you afjgfsdkljg and we looooooove tension in this household hehe :D day 18 is particularly tender you’re right i enjoyed writing it a lot!!!! k-drama writers everywhere are found jobless as i take their jobs with the hand holding scene!!!!! JUNGWOOOOO THE LEGEND HIMSELF :D IM HAPPY YOU LIKED HIS SCENES!! jaem and oc making a sex tape was one of my favorite scenes to write omg and mayyyybe mark got his shit rocked so wonderfully bc she’d been thinking about doing it for a w h i l e :) omg and the ending!!!!!! im really glad you guys liked the ending so much :’) yeah johnny was a classic himbo in that moment but you gotta love the guy. jaehyun is really not very subtle about his feelings so it’s surprising that oc didn’t realize what was going on....... she’s got dumb bitch itis and she may not be able to hide from him forever but she may damn well try 👀 no dont apologize youre not rambling i have been rereading your messages for the past couple of days bc they make me so happy!!! honestly jaehyun is a horndog with a heart in like. almost every fic i write i will not lie. eeeek thank you!!!!!!! me too im excited to write it so i gotta get these other fics out of the way first!! there will still be action with the other guys!! (against oc’s better judgment; poor girl thinks with her pussy and not her brain or heart) i love you too darling!!!!!!!! thank you for all this incredible feedback omg and nO he’s not like. a petty bitch he’s a sweetheart nooooo AND YEAH JOHNNY..... HE BE KNOWING™ and oooh its interesting that you say that but i wont say why!! THANK YOU SO SO MUCH IM SO HAPPY YOU LIKED IT AND THAT YOU LEFT SUCH INCREDIBLY DETAILED FEEDBACK :’)

#🍪 #answered #anon

[trophywifejimgordon]

okay so, oswald’s stupid aliases meta? oswald’s stupid aliases meta. 

after returning to gotham in 1x3, oswald fairly quickly takes on a few false titles, first when confronted by a fish mooney lackey in an alley who recognizes him as the ex umbrella boy (in a panic, he tells the man that he must be confused, his name is dmitri... yeah, no), then when trying to endear himself to don maroni (trying to claim italian heritage, he calls himself paolo), and finally, in 1x4, when introducing himself to barbara (”i’m peter. peter... humboldt.”). 

so.

of these, and i’m separating the last one into two parts, i pretty much have the least to say about dmitri. while oswald has some time off screen to think about the other names, the confrontation with the mook forces him to come up with that one on the spot, so imo it’s the least likely to have heavy significance; likely he just chose it because it’s a very slavic name to fit the very slavic accent he’s not fooling anyone with. if i were really pressed about it, i might point out that dmitri is derived from demeter, the greek goddess of the harvest (among other things). demeter is responsible for the growth of the crops, but also presides over the cycle of life and death and the sacred law; one of her titles is “law-bringer,” referring to the idea that idea that law and order formed in agricultural society. the interaction oswald has here with this mook is notable in that--before he kills the guy--oswald insists that “gotham needs him! [he is] its future!” oswald aligning himself, consciously or not, with being responsible for gotham’s fertility, its health, and most of all its structure, would not be out of character for him, and is in fact directly supported by his interactions with the man to whom he gives the fake name. 

but that’s all pretty tenuous. 

next up, paolo! this one, i had fun with. see, i had a somewhat classical education. i read the inferno. that being so, my immediate connection with the name paolo (and, indeed, the only major literary connection i could find) was to the story of paolo malatesta and francesca da rimini. they’re condemned to the second circle of hell for their lust, yadda yadda, whatever. i’m mostly just concerned with the man himself; one source (from the owlcation page on paolo and francesca) describes him as “a romantic sort, a man not really interested in the world around him.” (emphasis mine.) which is fun, because guess what oswald’s doing at the time that he gives this name? he’s almost just been hired as a dishwasher at bamonte’s, maroni’s favorite restaurant. given the job, he’s warned that he hears nothing, sees nothing, says nothing. in all likelihood, oswald gives maroni this name mainly for its obvious italian origin, attempting (successfully) to endear himself to the obviously italian don by claiming “his mother’s” italian ancestry. however, there are a lot of italian names he could have chosen from. i don’t see why his choice of this one couldn’t also be a subtle way of reaffirming that he’s following the rules set out for him. paolo malatesta’s wikipedia page (and like, wikipedia as a source, i know, i know, but) takes this a little further, recounting that paolo is traditionally portrayed as a man “not very inclined to aspirations for power.” very NOT oswald, obviously. at the same time, very appropriate for his meek act as he slowly endears himself to maroni. even spicier, though, is this: “recent investigations, however, reveal [paolo] as a young man very attentive to politics and immersed in the political intrigue of the time.” so, could this mean that his fake name is not only a reaffirmation of his lowly position, but also a very, very veiled hint that he’s more than he seems? it would feel appropriate, in this case, that the traditional interpretation of malatesta is the one that oswald is banking on to facilitate his squirm into maroni’s inner circle, while the contemporary reading is the one he actually identifies with. that’s oswald all over; in touch with the old ways, yet in a class all his own.

a little less dramatically, paolo, like the anglicized “paul,” has roots meaning “small” or “humble.” so, in more ways than one, the name can be seen as oswald bending at the knee to maroni’s apparent superiority... and beginning to bide his time.

now, peter humboldt. 

you know, i really never did like this name? i’ve watched 1x4 at least six or seven times, and it always kind of made me go :/ when he offered it, because it’s just kind of... ugly, i guess. i have to say though (while i still think it’s ugly on sound alone), i’m fully obsessed with it now. 

like i said, i’m breaking this down into two parts. my analysis of the “peter” half, as with my analysis of “dmitri,” is a little more tenuous, just because it’s a fairly plain, common name. however, the low hanging fruit is the apostle peter, and never let it be said that i don’t take the low hanging fruit. so... peter. on the surface, oswald doesn’t have a whole lot in common with the story of peter the apostle, and that kind of threw a wrench in my analysis for a while. being inclined to fit that particular square block into this particular round hole, though, i got there. don’t worry, y’all. my penchant for bullshit knows no bounds.

first thing’s first, it bears note that “peter” was an alias of sorts for the apostle, too, since his given name was simon/simeon. he was jesus’s first disciple, and went from that to eventually heading up the church after the crucifixion and all following, becoming the “first pope.” such an ascension is a little reminiscent of oswald’s from umbrella boy to the head of the gotham underworld, i guess. and that’s cool. But We Can Go Deeper. i think it’s always kind of useful to keep in mind who the alias is for at the time; who oswald is trying to fool. in this case, the recipient of his bullshit is barbara kean, with an audience of an already in-the-know jim gordon. before his ascension, and furthermore, before either of them joined with christ, peter was already affiliated with a few other disciples: andrew (his brother), john, and james. (neither here nor there, but st. james was the first of the disciples to be martyred. jim...) peter and james--and the others, but i’m talking about peter and james--worked together; they were fishermen. in light of his audience, i think that it’s not entirely inconceivable that oswald is affirming his pre-ascent connection to james gordon (who he does exclusively refer to as james for the duration of the scene, rather than the ‘jim’ we get a lot more later on). not to mention, you know, the whole nautical theme. it’s not a particularly inspired link, but it does kind of work for him. additionally, while i still admit this is not the strongest meta i’ve ever written, oz choosing this name for these reasons would pair nicely with a running theme later in the season (that gets more or less dropped off by season 2, disappointingly), wherein oswald is repeatedly implied to have at least a tenuous christian background and some possible lingering expression of faith... think about the season finale, when falcone tells him he’ll burn in hell and oswald is momentarily taken aback, admitting, “i do worry about that.” 

(while i’m on this particular bullshit, one other thing that peter is known for is denying jesus three times after his death, but ultimately being forgiven and heading jesus’s church anyway. because i am a lover of Increasingly Tenuous Connections, i kind of see this as foreshadowing of the twist in 1x7. oswald’s protests to fish in the pilot that he would never betray her are reminiscent of peter’s insistence that even if every other disciple renounced jesus, he would not. naturally, he did betray her, and implicitly falcone through her. he continues renouncing his falcone ties, first by secretly joining maroni and then by openly joining maroni and threatening to spark a gang war... but at the end of it all, we learn that his “loyalties” (such as they are) never actually changed--he’s still falcone’s man. just. idk. idk. i’m Thinking About It.) 

aaaaand, finally, humboldt. 

so :) 

this is the part that i honestly wrote this whole thing to explore. because the thing is? i looooooove that he chose the name humboldt, now that i feel like i know why he chose it. i still think it sounds like a stupid name, but the subtext? the implications? UGH! 

right off the bat, my first impression was just that it sounds like the word “humble,” which goes back to the thing with paolo. neat enough. but, this name isn’t given to don maroni--it’s given to barbara. and remember, that’s important. so, what does humboldt mean, other than that? well, the one person with that name famous enough to bear mentioning is apparently alexander von humboldt. i’m certain that the name is, one way or another, a reference to him... and i’ll get to why in a second. he was a prussian (so, eastern european--check) polymath, as well as a naturalist, romantic philosopher, explorer, etc, and raised mainly by a single mother to boot. not all of his hats are directly related to oswald’s interests and skillsets, i’ll grant you, but the fact that he was a naturalist does have direct implications for why i think oswald choosing this name was a deliberate reference to this person by the writers of the show, because see, the thing is, there were quite a few animals named after him... including Spheniscus humboldti.

the humboldt penguin.

given that it’s gotham, i do have to acknowledge the possibility (probability) that that’s as deep as it goes. the writers were looking for a clever way to slip another penguin reference in there (they’re not. exactly. subtle, especially in season one, with the way that the characters are going to turn out), they looked up breeds of penguins, found this one, that’s it. but, on the other hand, there are other breeds of penguins that they could have chosen, and they chose this one. whether it was deliberate or only an accident, the decision was made, and i am running with it. 

because, like, another fun thing about humboldt: he was gay. 

(side note 2: you know tfw you’re on someone’s wikipedia page and there’s a ton of information about them and their life and their contributions to science but you’re like outta my way i ONLY want to know this man’s sexuality? ah, the personal life tab. where would we be without you.)

well, it’s one of those situations where you have to decide if you’re going to try to ascribe modern sexuality labels to historical figures, and at the end of the day, i won’t really get into it. however, though there is some scholarly discourse that cites him as a largely asexual figure (and while i’m definitely not getting into it and do not intend this as an attack on the asexual community in any way, i have to say an obviously gay man being desexualized to make him more palatable feels... familiar), the facts seem undeniable that he experienced same-sex attraction, whether or not you want to define this as exclusive. it is speculated that he had notable affairs with or at least vehement attraction toward wilhelm gabriel wegener, reinhardt von haeften, françois arago, and possibly his valet seifret, among others. maybe gotham writers didn’t intend for this little throwaway alias to be read as an announcement of oswald’s sexuality (although, even if “humboldt” wasn’t, the exchange he has with barbara--“i never get to meet any of jim’s friends, because he doesn’t tell me anything” “men.” “don’t i know!”--sure was... something), but as i am not a coward, i am perfectly content to read it as one anyway. and don’t forget what i said--this is the alias he gives to barbara. barbara, about whom he knows a possibly suspicious amount, given that she’s almost irrelevant to his political schemes. barbara, whose apartment he went to for jim gordon. barbara, who is, perhaps, his perceived romantic rival. 

look, it’s probably just a name and a penguin joke. but what’s the point of metatextual analysis if you can’t be like “he showed up and told barb his name was peter humboldt because he wanted to affirm that his origins are tied to saint jim’s and let it be known that the two of them are in competition for jim’s attention all in the most dramatic way possible and while smugly congratulating himself on being so clever and subtle”?? this isn’t really a threat--in contrast to how creepy he is with women he is threatening, namely fish and liza, oswald is downright courteous to barbara--so much as it is an indulgent expression of petty jealousy. i think he wants jim but perhaps doesn’t even realize the extent or in which way yet; he just wants barbara to know, on some level, that she’s sharing, and jim to know (because jim is just as much an audience to his performance here, and he knows that the alias is fake, might be driven to consider, with that detective brain of his, why he chose what he chose...), on some level, that they’re tied. 

oof. ok. that was a lot, but one last thing. since i’m already indulging in gratuitous oswald parallels with humboldt anyway, i might as well point out this line from a letter he wrote to reinhardt von haeften, after von haeften’s engagement to a woman: “Even if you must refuse me, treat me coldly with disdain, I should still want to be with you... the love I have for you is not just friendship or brotherly love, it is veneration.”

i’m on my bullshit, but... you can hear it in his voice, right?

#gotham #oswald cobblepot #meta #text post #..... #gobblepot #look. look. the fact that dissecting gotham like this is inherently futile vs. I Want It To Be That Deep Dot Jpeg #i was writing my notes on 1x3 and 1x4 of gotham last night #and on a lark #a laugh #i went down a rabbit hole of 'hey i wonder if that name was supposed to mean anything' #TURNS OUT!!!!! #i could have done this in a 'in this essay i will' format but that would rob me of the opportunity to actually go ham #which is obviously unacceptable. given the circumstances.

[eeyore101247]

Through Your Window

Pairings: Peter Parker x Reader

Summary: What happens when you're caught watching Peter through his dorm window?

Prompt: We live in halls opposite each other and I keep seeing you changing through your window (from @anifanatical)

Warnings: Fluff, lots of fluff, maybe angst?

3,216 words

Masterlist

This has been going on for three weeks now. THREE WEEKS. Three weeks since I first saw Spider-man crawl into the window of the dorm across from mine. Since I watched Spider-man take off his mask to reveal Peter Parker, my longtime crush, underneath. I still didn't know how to process this information as I currently watched him climb into his dorm room once again. I should tell him I know, but I can barely even talk to him without stuttering. I mean, I've had a crush on him since we went to high school together at Midtown! I can't just approach him now and be like "Hey, so, I know you're Spider-man cause I watch you through your dorm room window cause I've had this major crush on you since high school." I sighed as my focus returned to Peter undressing from his suit. I couldn't keep my eyes off his toned body as he stretched before starting to dress in his night clothes. My eyes drifted up to his face when he had stopped moving and I quickly closed the blinds. His chocolate brown eyes had stared back at me, horror written in them. 

"Fuck! Shit! Damn it!" I cursed, turning around in my desk chair and standing up, running my fingers through my (Y/H/C) hair.

"Did you finally get spotted?" My roommate asked, peeking in through my door. (Y/F/N) has known about my crush on Peter since day one and also knows about my habit of watching him through the window with a 'lovesick gaze,' as she puts it. I turn to glare at her, grumbling under my breath.

"So you did get spotted!" She laughed, rolling more into view.

"Shut up." I mumbled, still glaring at her. "Now he knows about me watching him and is gonna confront me about it. What am I gonna do?" I groaned, face planting on my bed. I heard (Y/F/N) giggle as she walked into the room, abandoning her desk chair in the doorway.

"Hey, I'm sure we'll figure something out before he does." She said as she patted me on the back. I felt the depression in my bed as she sat down, turning my head to look at her and groan again. "It's not that bad, (Y/N). Maybe you'll finally tell him how you feel. How in looooooove you are with him." (Y/F/N) teased, a large grin on her face. I glared, grabbing on of my pillows and throwing it at her, causing her to laugh.

"This is gonna be so embarrassing!" I whined, burying my face back into my sheets. He's probably gonna think I'm some weird stalker. Or worse! I rolled over onto my back, staring up at the ceiling as (Y/F/N) let out a giggle beside me. I covered my face with my hands, taking a deep breath. "Thank God we don't have any classes together. That would make avoiding him tomorrow and God knows how long even harder."

"You'll have to deal with it eventually." (Y/F/N) said as she stood up. I peeked from behind my fingers, watching as she walked over to her chair and pushed it out of the way. "Anyways, it's getting late and I have a huge test tomorrow. Night!" She called, closing your door as she left. "Shit." I mumbled to myself as I sat up, grabbing my phone off my desk and looking at the time. It was almost midnight and I had to be up at 7 for class. Sighing, I stood up, going through my nightly routine before crawling into bed and curling up under my sheets. Hopefully avoiding him will be easy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Avoiding him was not easy in the slightest. He was waiting for me after nearly all of my classes. I successfully managed to avoid him every time up until that night, when he Spider-maned his way to my dorm window. I nearly died of a heart attack when I saw him outside my window. Thankfully, (Y/F/N) had already left for the weekend, leaving me alone in the dorm. Setting my ramen down on my desk, I pulled up the blinds and opened the window, giving him a shy wave.

"Um, hi." I said softly, stepping aside as I watched him climb in. I looked away as I felt my cheeks begin to burn. Oh my God, he's in my dorm in a tight lycra suit. Spider-man is in my dorm! PETER PARKER IS IN MY DORM IN A TIGHT LYCRA SUIT!

"Hey." I heard him say in response. After several deep breaths in an attempt to calm myself and return my cheeks to a normal color, I turned to face him. He'd already removed his mask, his brown hair messy, his lips forming a thin line. I couldn't gather up the nerve to look him in the eyes, opting to look down at my feet. "How long?"

"What?" I asked, glancing up at him, still unable to look him in the eye.

"How long have you known?" He asked, causing me to swallow nervously. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest, my hands sweating as I clasped them together, wringing my fingers through each other. 

"W-well, uh, y-you see..." I started, laughing nervously. How am I going to explain this to him? I ran my fingers through my hair, shifting on my feet. "So, um, i-it was an accident first off." I said, finally meeting his gaze. They told me everything. How serious this was but also how scared he is that someone found out. I took a breath, my shoulders slumping forward in defeat as my gaze moved back to my feet. "Three weeks."

"Three weeks?! You've known for three weeks and didn't say anything to me about it." He said in annoyance, starting to pace in my room. I sat down on the edge of my bed, hiding my face in my hands as a lump formed in my throat. I should have told him sooner. Now he's angry and will hate me forever. "Why didn't you tell me?" My breath caught in my throat, the lump growing larger and making it harder to speak. I'm gonna have to tell him. I couldn't get anything but a whimper out. I felt horrible. Absolutely horrible.

"You can not tell anyone." He said after minutes of silence passed. I just nodded silently, keeping my face hidden in my hands. My eyes were burning as tears threatened to make their way down my cheeks. I took a ragged breath, trying to keep my composure as anxiety slowly took over. He's not gonna want to be my friend anymore. He'll never want to talk to me, and I'll never get to tell him how I feel. God, I fucked up. I've ruined everything. 

"(Y/N)?" I didn't respond. I couldn't respond. If I tried to speak, the dam would break. With a deep, shaky breath, I rubbed my eyes, forcing a smile on my face as I looked up at him. I met his gaze with my own, regretting it instantly. Instead of the anger I expected, there was concern. My smile faltered, but I kept it there. Trying to swallow the lump in my throat, I responded.

"I-I promise." My voice came out strained and I cringed, knowing that it told him everything. He let out a sigh as he moved to sit beside me, looking down at his mask in his hands. I looked down at my hands sitting in my lap, the fake smile falling as my eyes burned once more and the lump returned. "I-I'm sorry for not telling you sooner." I said quietly, my voice coming out weak. I didn't even try to hide it as a tear slid down my cheek. "I-I didn't mean to make you angry. I... I was just scared." I brought my feet up on the edge of the bed, hugging my knees to my chest.

"I'm not angry, (Y/N). I just wish you would have told me sooner." He said in response. I could feel him looking at me, but I couldn't meet his gaze. I didn't want to know how disappointed he was in me. I nodded silently in response, resting my chin on my knees as I stared at my dorm room wall. "Why were you looking into my dorm room anyway?" He asked, his eyes still trained on me. There was nothing I could do to stop the growing blush that appeared at that question, trying to hide it from him by burying my face against my legs. It's now or never.

"BecauseIlikeyou." I said quickly, muffling it with my legs and hoping he didn't understand what I said. I squeezed my eyes closed, the silence washing over me as my heart constricted in my chest. It was agonizing, sitting there in silence after such a confession and waiting for the rejection. Minutes passed as the silence continued, and I wasn't able to hold it in anymore as I sobbed.

"I-I-I'm so s-sorry. I k-know it's creepy a-and I shouldn't have done it, b-but you're just so cute a-and handsome and fit a-a-and adroably dorky. I just... I couldn't..." I was stopped by a hand on my shoulder, another forcing my face from against my legs and towards him. I sniffled as I lifted my gaze, noticing the smile on his face and gleam in his eyes as I met them with my own. Before I could say anything more, his lips covered mine in the sweetest, chaste kiss. It didn't last long before he pulled away, his smile even larger. 

"I like you too." He said softly, a blush covering his cheeks. God, he looks adorable when he's blushing. I sat there silently, unable to speak as my heart hammered in my chest. Wait, he kissed me. Peter Parker kissed me. SPIDER-MAN KISSED ME WHILE HE'S WEARING A SKIN TIGHT LYCRA SUIT! Upon this realization, I squeaked, jumping back on my bed and narrowly avoiding hitting my head on the wall. Peter chuckled as he watched my face turn crimson, everything fully dawning on me. I quickly covered my face with my hands to try and hide my blushing face, but soon felt him grab my wrists and pull them away.

"You shouldn't hide your beautiful face. Plus, you're adorable when you blush." He said with a grin, gently pulling me back over to him by my wrists. My face only continued to grow redder as I realized, in the close proximity, that the suit hid nothing. My eyes very quickly moved back up to his gaze, wide as I stared at him and tried to forget just how good he looked in the suit and everything that I could see. His cheeks soon turned pink as well as he pulled away and quickly stood up. 

"Uh, I-I'll be back in an hour. I'm gonna go change out of my suit and put on some clothes." He said quickly, making his way to your window as he pulled his mask back over his head. "Talk to you soon?' He asked, his voice muffled by the mask. I nodded silently, watching as he jumped out the window and took a detour around to his dorm room. I couldn't stop the smile that crossed my face as I replayed his confession in my head, closing the window and silently watching as he stripped out of his suit before closing my blinds. I glanced down and noticed my forgotten ramen, sighing as I picked it up and took it to the kitchen to heat it back up.

After dinner and a cold shower, there was a knock on the door. I slipped on my night shirt before making my way to the door, cracking it open just a sliver to see who it was. Peter was standing there nervously, dressed in sweatpants and a t shirt, his hair still messy. My smile grew as I opened the door the rest of the way, inviting him inside.

"Hi." I said softly, blushing as I watched him walk in and closed the door behind him. He turned around to face me, his cheeks tinted red as well as he returned a silent hello. "So, um, w-we should probably talk about that kiss." I said softly, playing with the ends of my hair. He nodded as he turned to look around the dorm, taking everything in. Quietly taking his hand, I led him over to the sofa, sitting down and pulling him down beside me. His hand was clammy, telling me just how nervous he was. I looked at him with a gentle smile, keeping my hand on his. 

"So, uh, (Y/N), w-would you like to go on a date sometime?" He asked, looking over at me with a nervous smile. I just nodded silently, my heart pounding in my chest hard and loud enough for him to hear. I watched as he let out a breath, his nervous smile turning into a genuine one. "T-that's good, so, uh, w-" 

"Peter." I said softly, moving a bit closer to him with a smile. "Before you start making plans for some big elaborate date or something, I don't mind the simple things." I said, giving his hand a squeeze as he smiled.

"Ok, so nothing too big then." He said softly, gently giving my hand a squeeze back. I inched even closer, my thigh now pressed against his. "How about dinner and a movie tomorrow night? I pick you up at 7?"

"That sounds great." I said with a smile, looking up at him. I glanced down at his lips as my heart swelled with happiness before looking back into his chocolate brown eyes. Being this close, I could notice the small hazel specks of color in them, making them all the more beautiful. I leaned in, my lips pressing against his. I could feel him smiling into the kiss as he deepened it. My other hand slid up to the back of his neck, his other hand coming to rest on my cheek as he licked at my lower lip, asking for permission. I happily parted my lips, feeling his tongue slip inside as the battle for dominance began. Soon, the demand for air became prominent, causing us to pull away. Our breath mingled in the small space between us, goofy smiles on both of our faces as we sat there, just enjoying the moment. 

"I should probably head back to my dorm. I told Ned I wouldn't be gone too long." He said softly, pulling away with a smile. I gave a small nod, standing up and pulling him with me, our fingers intertwined as we headed for the door. "You're welcome over here whenever you like. In and out of the suit." I said softly, my cheeks burning as I looked at him. He gave a soft chuckle as I opened the door, giving me one last kiss before walking out with a smile, our hands separating. 

"I'll keep that in mind. Goodnight (Y/N)." He said softly, turning to look at me as he stood in the hall.

"Goodnight Peter." I said in response, watching the smile on his face grow as he turned and walked down the hallway towards his dorm. I quietly closed the door, squeeing softly as I started to jump around the dorm. "I'm going on a date with Peter! I'm going on a date with Peter!" I sang happily, skipping to my room and sitting down on my bed. I grabbed my phone, moving to text (Y/F/N), but I stopped, deciding I'd surprise her on Monday with the news. With one quick glance out my window towards Peter's dorm, I laid down, trying to drift off into the sweet land of sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Monday quickly came, the date Saturday night having gone amazingly well. Peter had come over Sunday morning as well, the two of us going to get breakfast and hang out for a bit before I returned to my dorm to welcome (Y/F/N) back from visiting her family and hang out with her for the rest of the night. 

I let out a sigh as my biology professor released us from class, stuffing my books in my bag and zipping it shut. I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket, quickly pulling it out to see who the text was from.

From: Peter <3

Hey, wanna go get lunch?

I smiled, quickly typing back a response and sending it.

To: Peter <3 

Sure! Mind if (Y/F/N) tags along? I usually eat lunch with her on Mondays.

I slung my bag over my shoulder, holding my phone in my hand with a grin as I walked out of the classroom, waving at (Y/F/N) as she stood outside waiting. "Hey, how was your class?" I asked as we began to walk, heading towards the student union in the middle of campus.

"Ugh, it was boring." She said in response, pushing her bangs out of her face. "My professor let us out thirty minutes early though. So I was happy about that." She said, looking over at me with a smile. "What about you?"

I shrugged as my phone vibrated once more. I looked down to see another text from Peter, causing a smile to tug at my lips.

From: Peter <3 

I don't mind. We should probably tell her soon anyways.

"What are you smiling about?" (Y/F/N) asked, raising a brow.

"Nothing." I said with a giggle, knowing she was going to freak when she found out. We continued to make small talk as we made our way to the union, soon arriving. Peter stood outside waiting, a smile on his face as he spotted the two of you. Ned was standing beside him, messing around with something on his phone.

"Hey Peter, hey Ned!" (Y/F/N) said, a smirk on her face as she glanced over at me. I just smirked back as I waltzed up to Peter, looking at him and grinning as I leaned up and pecked him on the lips. 

"Hey (Y/F/N), hey (Y/N)." Ned said in response, looking up and giving us both a wave before returning to his phone. I gently took Peter's hand, intertwining my fingers with his as I smiled up at him. I watched as he looked over at my friend, chuckling.

"I think we may have broke her, (Y/N)" He said, pointing at my friend. I looked over at her and giggled as she stood there, mouth agape and eyes wide. "I'm starving, let's go get some lunch." Ned said as he put his phone away and headed inside the union, Peter pulling you along behind. (Y/F/N) glared as she walked up beside me, whispering quietly.

"You are so going to tell me what the hell happened over the weekend when we get back to our dorm." I just laughed as we made our way inside, knowing she would want all the details. I would just have to omit the part about my new boyfriend also being Spider-man.

AN: Woo! I already posted this one shot on my AO3 and Wattpad, but I thought I would post it here as well for those who don’t know what those are, aren’t on those sites, or can’t access those sights!

Thank you for reading and feel free to send me requests and prompts!

~LoLo *^-^*

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Send me any questions or what you thought!

#peter parker fanfiction #tom holland #peter parker #peter parker x reader #peter parker x you #peter parker x y/n #college au #peter parker being adorable #peter parker fluff #thomas stanley holland #eeyore101247

[koszmar-zycie]

All of the fun, random questions! Do it!

Oh lawdy! To quote Ace Ventura: “Aaaaaalrighty, then!” - Apologies for the janky post, since I can’t space them without the site making the numbers all screwy.

Do you have any “yeah I’m good at it but I hate it” kind of skills? - hmmmm. To be honest, leading. If you buy into horoscopes, I’m a Dragon. And maybe it’s natural, maybe it’s theatre experience. But when I apply myself as a leader, I do AMAZING. The issue is that I generally like to be a support. Sometimes I like leading, but usually I’m not into the idea of being this focus or figurehead guiding the way as the leader. Whether projects or even fun, I tend to fall into a like... intermediate leadership role at best. 

If you could make one type of food cease to exist, what would you banish? - To be honest, I can’t do that. Even foods I’m not fond of are foods, and I would be remised if I were to remove any.  

You’re allowed to know everything about one highly specific thing/topic. What would you choose? - Deep sea thermal based biology. The deep sea is my 100% very favorite place on Earth. If I die and there’s an afterlife, I want endless ocean of all kinds. If I’m reincarnated, I want to be a Dragonfish or something. At any rate, I would do anything to have such a wealth of knowledge. Especially about something as fascinating to me as the ins and out of how the deep sea creatures that survive and thrive around the *extreme* heat and pressure of the vents. 

What’s a fictional character who you want to be like? In what way do you want to be like them? - I would love to be like Nathan Ford from Leverage. I want to be able to live my life as freely and wildly as he (though maybe not as illegally lol), and also pursue what I feel is right for me. Live through and persevere through hardship as well as he, even if he struggled.

If you had to live in and not leave a city for the rest of your life, what city would you choose? - That would be a VERY hard call between Avalon on Catalina Island USA, or Sedona, Arizona. While Sedona overall has more of what I love, Avalon has the sea. And I’d probably die without my ocean. 

Do you tend to say what you’re thinking? What would people think of you if you did the opposite?  - Usually, yes. But in a careful way. It WILL happen periodically, because I’m also an emotional hunk of waste. But in general I do a decent enough job of being honest without being harsh about it. When I’m provoked or something really gets to me, then I can just vent without thinking.

Is there anything that you’ve done/experienced so much you hate it now? Easiest to come up with are like, food or music. - Hmmm. Not really. Halloween got SEVERELY killed for me, though. I still like it, but Haunt people are by and large the most obnoxious and hypocritical. Since I adore haunt, I HAVE to deal with them. Hatred for Christmas and other holidays while spouting about Halloween has drained my interest in Halloween. So yes an no, because that’s really OTHER people killing it for me. But I’m also sort of involved because of my love of the haunt business.

Were you afraid of anything “silly”/irrational as a child that you’ve since outgrown? - Deep water. As a kid I HATED the deep end of pools. Now I’m obsessed with deep water and the dark, unknown, crushing depths. Funny how things work out! I used to hate going near the slope in a pool if it was even a little dark (lighted pools were fine). Now, the only thing stopping me from just continuing to swim down if I go diving is my tank limits.

If you were to impart one moral lesson (think Aesop’s fables, Golden Rule, etc) on the world, what would it be? - Treat others as you wish to be treated. It’s SO easy to say, and yet nobody does it. 

If you were a DND character or a game character (or something like that) what would your highest stat be? What would you want your highest stat to be? What about the lowest, to both of those? - HA. I think about this way too much. I’d be a sea elf druid. STR 10 INT 12 CHA 16 DEX 12 END 18 WIS 18 - If I were to apply myself logically as an analog of myself, I’d have good durability and understanding and social capability (again, in specific regards), but my outward strength and dex would be kinda average. I like to think that I’m decently intelligent, as I LOVE books, learning, and figuring things out. But I’m also far from genius. Hence my focus on Wisdom. I’m also surprisingly dexterous, but in certain circumstances more than others, so that’s also pretty average. I don’t think I’ve really have any “bad” stats, but I’d definitely mix average with a couple high ones.

Is there anything you judge others for when you probably shouldn’t? - Probably. I have a huge mistake of expecting others to be courteous and offer a common decency/open perspective on things.

Who are “your kind” of people? - Goths and hippies, my friend. If you want to know my style? Goth Druid. lol 

If you had to come up with your last words right now… what would they be? - “Don’t regret not accomplishing what you set out to accomplish. Regret having not tried. I do not regret trying, even if I did not succeed.”

Do you have any “weirdly strong” opinions about things that don’t really matter? - This is VERY obscure (I have others, but it’s late and this came to mind first) But if you play Fate Grand Order.... SET YOUR GOD DAMNED SUPPORTS.

Your goal is to completely confuse the people around you in as short a time as possible– what do you say/do? - Honestly, just start quoting Lorne from Season 5 of Angel. Or act like a Malkavian. One of my VTM characters was a Malkavian who got in a fight with a parachute he had. Her name was Kitten.

What’s the most comfy place you’ve been in? - I don’t know, actually. Maybe the Luxe Hotel in LA during Anime Expo?

Did you have any “silly” beliefs as a kid? Where did they come from (parents, friends, out of nowhere, etc)? - Not that I know of. At least in terms of anything that’d have changed or something. I’m sure there’s Something, but I honestly can’t dig anything up in my memories.

If you were to add or remove one physical feature to yourself… what would it be? Can be from animals, can be from imagination… whatever. - Hahaha, I ALWAYS think about this one. Right now, I’d want maybe the electro-vision of sharks. 

What could you happily give a two hour lecture on? - Ocean conservation, and what’s correct and what isn’t.

What would a mirror opposite version of yourself be like? It doesn’t necessarily have to be an evil version– any feature can be reflected! - Someone who’s mostly optimistic. More bright colors than dark, short hair. Focused on socializing and extroverted. More than happy in one place forever, without an interest in travel. 

What’s an occasion you’ve done a double take? - Anime Expo a number of times. Seeing weird or unexpected, or legendary cosplays. 

If you could only see one color (and its varying shades– dark/light) for the rest of your life… what would you choose? - Blue. Guess that was probably obvious. But it’s a cool color and associated with calming. Between dark midnight and navy blues to vibrant aquamarines pressing towards green (without actually going into it), I feel like there’s a happy spectrum of all kinds that would be enough to get through without going too crazy.

Do your friends all share certain qualities? Major or minor! - Despite my.... unique personality, and preference towards quiet etc (INFJ), I have a lot of radically different kinds of friends. I honestly don’t think I could put any one thing down. Other than that I choose my friends carefully on who I think I can trust and is a good persona at heart. To a sufficient degree anyway. That’s also a huge part of my downsides, too. By being sensitive (and having certain conditions), when a friend does something that hurts me, it REALLY hurts.

How do you motivate yourself to do things? - Oh man, that’s funny. It is entirely circumstantial. As an artist/writer/creative (I use artist in the broad sense, but I figured I’d add that to help specify) I can VERY easily just have motivation on a moments notice. So it’s often pretty random. But if not, I jut need to think of why. I Looooooove gardening. Weeds need pulling? I think about what’ll happen if the roses or tomatos or lemon tree don’t get their water because of weeds sucking it up. Need to write? I’ll never leave my creation for *any*one if I don’t at least crack down on notes, and make slow and steady progress if nothing else. It’s usually just a small thing I think of to act as a spark, but it’s usually very effective.

What’s one of your favorite jokes? Tell it to us!  - Okay, so this isn’t a joke, but it’s seriously STILL making me laugh just thinking about it. I was going to reference an old comedian in a previous post (I didn’t end up doing it, but still). Anyway, I was really confused as to why I couldn’t find him in google. It turns out, instead of looking up “Groucho Marx”, I was googling “Marco Grouch”. LOL That’s probably not quite as funny to y’all, but for some reason it’s killing me. XD

Hooooooeeee! Well, that was long, but actually really fun! Thank you @scatteredstoryteller! That was like... an essay. lol But definitely fun. I love asks. XD

[jaerie]

Hi! I wanted to drop by and tell you that I love your fics so much. They are always so original and sometimes a bit twisted but still beautiful and warm. I saw that list you made of the fics you wrote this year and it's so impressive, you are such a gift and I appreciate you tons! I recently read tonight the night and I have so many questions!! What was in Harry's duffle bag in the last scene? And how do they sustain themselves? Does Harry have a job that takes him away for a while? 1/2

I'm also wondering how they got their kids? Did Louis adopt them on his own? Does Harry have a fake identity? I loved it so much!! I also adored your Alex fic with amnesia Louis and it made me think of a prompt where Alex meets French Louis who's in the Resistance and he pulls off something monumental like in inglorious bastards. Also in my head Louis also happens to be an omega in this fic, but that's not necessary to the story. Would you ever consider writing Resistance Louis? 2/2

Oh my goodness! First thank you so much!  I loooooove world building!  It’s my favourite thing to do with my writing and I usually go for the most outlandish starting point so I hope things end up coming out original!  Harry’s definitely giving me a creativity boner over this whole eroda thing, it’s right up my alley, and I have conjured up sooooo many ideas of my own to run with even without having the whole story yet.  

[mind the spoilers below]

kdsfj;aopsijdgisd okay so I purposefully left tonight’s the night a little open ended and then a glimpse into the future because that’s how Dexter the show ends (not the same scenario or anything, just a cut off and then glipse at him living a different life).  So it’s meant to make you think and come up with your own thoughts on what happened... HOWEVER I did have some thoughts while writing it.  I think he’s living under a false identity but probably under just a different last name and different backstory to anyone who has met them outside of their home.  While I was setting up the opening of the epilogue, I was imagining them in a remote cabin on Lake Michigan or something where Harry was a fisherman by trade, something that was lowkey and didn’t require a ton of human interaction and also gave him a valid excuse to be out on the water at odd hours.  The duffle bag implies that he’s still out there “taking out the trash” so to speak, that it’s probably full of his knives and tools.  He isn’t as obsessive about it as he was back in Miami, though, just a few a year maybe.  I pictured Harry stock piling his money in offshore accounts etc since he lived a pretty modest life, so I think they would be just fine for money even if Louis wasn’t teaching, he just really enjoys it.  I imagine they probably paid a surrogate when Louis convinced Harry that they should start a family.  They’ve made him much softer and empathetic, more normal.  The other scenario I had, but I never really figured out the logistics, is that their first child was orphaned by murder, that Harry rescued them when he went in for a kill.  I imagine a remote terror cabin somewhere, the murderer kidnapping and holding women hostage for years.  The baby was born from that situation, the murderer killing the mother just before Harry swoops in to take him out.  He cant just leave the baby there to die, nobody knows the baby exists and both parents have been killed, the baby probably would have been too to make room for the next victim if Harry hadn’t have come in when he did.  So he wraps him up, brings him back to Louis, and they raise them on their own.  Louis loves it so much that he convinces Harry they should have another, this time biologically theirs, most likely Louis’.  

I loooooooved writing my alex fic!!  I cant believe it’s been 2 years since I wrote it for nano!! I LOVE the idea of a resistance louis fic so so so much and would LOVE to write it... however, I’m not sure I have the knowledge to pull it off.  Inglorious bastards is one of my favourite movies, I’ve seen it soooo many times, and I just don’t know if I could do it justice!! Believe me, I’ve rolled it around my brain a few times, though.  This is where I need a research assistant!!!! 

#does this count towards my nano word count? hahahaha #Anonymous

[bae-leth]

Oh wow that’s a really detailed dream? I enjoyed reading about it! I’m thinking that Lorenz has more of a playful rivalry with Claude than an actual hatred, since FE Facebook talks of him, Dedue and Hubert all being loyal to their lords, but it’d be interesting if he turned on him later on in the story.

(I had only one 3H dream since that last anon, and in mine all that happened was that Claude and Dimitri had a shouting match. I don’t even remember what it was about. le sigh.)

About headcanons - I think I’ll expand a bit on the students we already know, more than the students we don’t. As much as I want to talk about Lysithea, Marianne etc, there’s literally nothing to glean tidbits from, so I’ll hold off from headcanons until we learn something, at least.

…I predict that most of these will end up being friendship-related anyway, haha. Headcanons under the read more:

Edelgard:

- A perfectionist, excelling in all her studies/training/etc from a young age.

- However this led to other people looking up to her, rather than seeing her as an equal - this led to some loneliness growing up.

- She wanted proper friends, not just people who saw her solely as a prospective ruler, but eh. What can you do when you have an certain image to cultivate?

- (spoilers: friendships attained at the monastery later on, and this secretly makes her very happy)

- Edel always looked like a hard person to approach, but really she was just a kind soul underneath

- Siblings: I keep thinking that she might have a half-sibling who tries to usurp her position as heir apparent midway through the game lmao. Other than that though, she seems like the only-child type to me.

- Kids want to BE her, because she’s super cool. This makes Edelgard super mushy inside (she’ll try to deny it), so she has a soft spot for the kids that run up to her in excitement whenever she travels around the Empire

Dimitri:

- I wonder what his tinge of darkness is? Intsys might go for the standard ‘he is forced to follow his bloodthirsty father in committing atrocities in the name of the Church’

- Or perhaps he witnesses something horrific as a child, and is powerless to stop it, leading to immense guilt up to adulthood?

- Or maybe it’s an inherent character trait. Maybe Dimitri was the villain all along 😔 and childhood circumstances exacerbated this villainy.

- Apart from theorising about his darkness, I headcanon that he was a bit of a wild child who mellowed out when he got older and attained more responsibilities. A bit like BotW Link, but more outwardly cheerful/expressive. Chivalrous from the very beginning. A good boi

- I still reeeeally want him and Ingrid to be siblings… If this is the case, then you can bet all your money that Ingrid had the best puppy face as a kid, and got away with everything. Dimitri was blamed for eeeeverything, and Ingrid still teases him about it now

- (they’re the ultimate power-siblings tho. Could kill you easily)

Claude:

- Has a few little sisters - THAT’S how he became so sneaky, lmao

- Actually listened in on the council meetings when he was younger, while pretending that he found them boring. He gained a good grasp of the politics of Fodlan from a young age as a result, and used this to his advantage to gain the upper hand in Alliance discussions (to the chagrin of his fellow nobles). He was always very sharp

- Always enjoyed winding up Dimitri as a kid, since the young prince got comically mad very easily. However, this became more difficult once Dimitri mellowed out and grew into a far milder young man. (Difficult, but not impossible…)

- Tried winding up Edelgard as a kid, too, before very quickly giving up. The heir to the Adrestian Empire knew how to use an axe VERY well from a VERY young age, and she wasn’t afraid to use it.

-Pulled a lot of pranks as a youngster, and still does now. Got away with it before because he was cute, gets away with it now because he’s charismatic (and HOt). Lorenz cries everytime, because he can’t get away with anything, apparently…

Hubert:

- Oh gosh, this man. He’s probably the first student at the monastery to go grey, he worries over Edelgard and the future of her position so much

- Has had the loyal retainer trope down to a T since, well, forever.

- He was always the best at giving Edelgard advice, making her tea, cheering her up etc, so much so that castle maids would ask him for pointers when they wanted to do the same.

Dorothea:

- We know that she’s looked up to Manuela for ages, but consider this: she has Manuela merch.

- And she isn’t afraid to show it.

- A painting of Manuela, beautiful and absolutely massive, hangs in her dorm room, and she refuses to take it down. (To be fair, it’s a beautiful painting)

- AHAHAH but honestly? We already know he accepting she is of everyone, no matter their class, so I’m certain she was the same with her fans at the opera house.

- She always treated them kindly, despite how tired she might have been after that particular performance.

- She managed to attain a stellar reputation as a result - people loooooooved her.

- So it’s a bit of a shock when she goes from the eccentric, lovable people who adore her and who she has connections with at the opera house to the snobby noble NPCs at the monastery, but she does what she’s always done, and kills them with kindness.

- And sass, accordingly.

- And her voice. (She probably has Chords of Steel ✊)

Ferdinand:

- His pride in his family's status has landed him a lot of dislike amongst the other noble families.

- Not that he ever cared, though; as long as his family were thriving, he could care less about what others say

- Diligent in his training since a young age. He has to be, in order to keep up with Edelgard

- ... even if she doesn't notice that he's trying to form a rivalry with her

- (oops)

Bernadetta:

- Spent all social occasions in her room, making no noise and pretending she didn’t exist.

- Depending on her parents’ attitudes, her shy nature either landed her sympathy or scorn. If they scorned her, this would explain why she prefers to practise her hobbies in the comfort of her own room.

- (It would also mean that I would leap into my switch to punch her parents herself)

- Felt much pressure to be conform to the typical self-assured noble role, which was a constant blow to her self esteem - especially because the ‘perfect’ noble, Edelgard, was right there, and easily comparable to her

- I’m pretty sure that she grows into her own throughout the course of the game, but since we’re talking about her past only, I can’t imagine that all the pressures of nobility would be good for her :(

Mercedes:

- MY GOOOOORL

- Why did she leave the Empire as a noble to settle as a commoner in the Kingdom?

- Methinks her family angered the nobles at court, and were forced to flee as a result. They didn’t agree with their methods/ideologies/etc, dared to speak out about it, and were threatened as a result

- It meant that Mercedes lost a lot of privilege and status as a result, but she didn’t mind. She could still heal others, and that was enough.

- She was initially lonely at the mage school before meeting Annette, although she was rather reluctant to admit it. However, the two of them soon became fast friends, and the rest is history

- (I headcanon that she only vaguely remembers Lorenz, which is a sucker punch to his ego lmao)

- Well-liked at court before her family’s fall to disgrace.

- Holds little ill-will towards those noble families that turned on her own - was only disturbed that they were that corrupt in the first place

Felix:

- He and Dimitri had a bit of a personality swap through the years.

- As children, Dimitri was the wild, reckless hooligan, while Felix was the one desperately trying to reign him in, for fear of losing the prince of Faerghus to some tragic accident (i.e. he tried taming a bear) under his watch

- As they grew older, Dimitri became more responsible. Felix, on the other hand, went 'fuck it’ and went absolutely ham. By this I mean that he starts his little challenging rituals

- which lands him in a lot of trouble, sometimes, because as it turns out, challenging a fifty year old senior knight at the tender age of fifteen doesn’t tend to turn out very well

- Dimitri ends up being the one to exasperatedly chase after him.

- Despite his 'lone wolf’ proclamations, the main reason Felix fights alone because he wants to look cool.

- The others (except Ashe) don’t buy this for a second. They haven’t done so in YEARS.

Dedue:

- Dimitri earned Dedue's respect ever since the prince defended one of his younger siblings from a drunkard in the marketplace

- As repayment, he offered to serve as a retainer for a period of time. Ended up being permanent, because his respect for Dimitri grew exponentially the more he spent time with him

- Green fingered. Probably worked wonders with the plants in his hometown.

- Dimitri once asked if he could tend to the palace gardens. Once Dedue realised that it was either him or Felix armed with a scythe, he quickly took up the offer.

- Since then, as well as being a retainer, Dedue often oversees the upkeep of the gardens. It's hard work, but he enjoys it. He makes sure to leave the plants in capable hands before the Blue Lions set off for the monastery

Ashe:

- Ok yes I know that we technically know nothing about Ashe either, but... my boy. I must headcanon him

- Ever since he joined the Blue Lions, Ashe had always been seen as the 'baby' of the group. The little brother. The one to look out for.

- It's just his face, y'know? Gotta protect that smile. Even Felix has a soft spot for him

- It exasperated Ashe to no end, because he KNEW he was capable enough to hold his own. He was just... short, okay??

- (His protests don't stop the rest of the Blue Lions affectionately doting on him. Currently, it's become a bit of a running gag between the members)

- Ashe, fists clenched: fight me!

- The rest of the Blue Lions, shaking their heads, drawing lances and mouthing softly: do not

- They all know he's capable, really, but it's always been funny to wind him up like this, so they all continue to do so.

- Everyone else knows that fighting Ashe is futile. You try and duel him, and suddenly there's a gang of 8 absolute b e a s t s tearing you to shreds. It's not fun

- Seeing as he doesn't have a crest, Ashe is probably a commoner.

- How did he end up with the Blue Lions? Either his own skill at the time, or him having a lot of potential, or both. I'm leaning towards the latter

Lorenz:

- Has horribly embarrassing anecdotes from his time at the mage school, which is why he is half thankful that Mercedes doesn't remember most of his blunders

- Annette remembers all of them, however.

- All of them.

- She uses these stories as blackmail material.

- Has always had a playful rivalry with Claude, but ultimately respects him. They play up their rivalry sometimes around the other nobles in the Alliance, just to create confusion

- Has an older sister who is infinitely more stylish and romantically successful than him. It pains him to even think about her success compared to his

- (doesn't stop him from knocking on her door for advice, though)

Hilda:

- Canonically spoilt by her father and older brother, yes. However, if you touch her family, and she will k i l l you

- s l o w l y

- so don't even think about it.

- Goes shopping and uses her poor brother as a shopping basket. The boy's groaning after five minutes. She smiles and adds more clothes onto his arm

- Her family can't resist her pleas... which caused quite a few petty squabbles. Imagine being Hilda's brother and getting a mug for Christmas, while you watch her get the cutest lil puppy, or something

- Despite this, she genuinely would do anything for her family. (even poison for them, if it came down to it...)

Raphael:

- His parents were killed in an accident, but for a long time Raphael felt guilty for not being able to do anything to save them, especially since he was so strong in the first place.

- What's the use of all his strength if he can't even protect his loved ones properly?

- Eventually, he pulls himself out of his slump. It takes a long time, but he realises that there's nothing he can do now except move forward and use his strength to protect those still living

- which is what he does! He gets Stronger, and uses his strength to protect his house.

- the others all admire how optimistic he is. His energy has always been infectious, and always draws out laughter from even the most despondent of people

- however, his constant training has always brought about shortages of training dummies for the Deer. Sometimes they go out to train, but there's just ... straw, in a heap on the floor.

- Raphael's optimism can't save him then 😤

#i'll check this tomorrow bc I'm really tired rn #but i rly hope the read more works on mobile lmao #will tag just in case #fire emblem three houses #fe16 #long post #headcanons #anon #ask

[fizzingwizard]

I know you touched up on it in your recent writing, but I was wondering what you thought about the yagami sibling's "I'll never forgive you/you can hate me if you want" scene in the last tri movie? I think it presented such an interesting dynamic especially since, between the siblings, we usually get a lot more doting big brother yamato, making the ishida-takaishi boys feel a lot closer (though I might be remembering wrong, it could also be bc takeru was originally in the digiworld from the get go aka longer). I just wish we had gotten some time to have proper resolution (or hints of) as to how hikari and taichi make amends with each other.

Yeah, it's a great moment, and it's a shame that we don't get to see the aftermath. (side note: I do think it's an optical illusion due to Takeru having been with the group from the start that makes he and Yamato seem closer than Taichi and Hikari. I've always seen both sets of siblings as being very close.) I love what they did with them but it did make the ending feel a little cold: first the reactions to Taichi’s apparent “death” were very belated and then his return is marred by everything else going on... Tri just needed to be one movie longer (or Saikai and Ketsui should have been blended together in one :P)

I don't think Hikari blames Taichi or hates him. I think she does feel betrayed, at least in the sense that, until then, she and her brother always seemed to be on the same path, and now Taichi's made a unilateral choice to go down a different one. But she doesn't think it's an evil one, or she wouldn't have chosen to stay and fight. It's just different and not what she wants. But the reason he can't stay on that path is because he's had to confront his convictions and found they came up short, so he’s adjusted. So I think they would need time to recalibrate their relationship afterward. Taichi must look like someone Hikari doesn't quite know anymore. But she'd still believe that she does know him deep down. And he respects her. This isn't about "Hikari's naive" anymore than it's about "Taichi's evil." It's just their relationship evolving and the growing pains that go along with that.

I guess that's how best I can sum it up, but as I’m allergic to brevity, there’s more under the cut...

I am sure Hikari always assumed her brother shared the vision of the future that we see from her at the end of 02. But as early as Saikai, we can already see that Taichi's grip on that sort of idealism is shaky. At that time what he's worried about is making a mistake, collateral damage, things getting out of hand. But in Bokura no Mirai, it's not about what he can't control anymore, it's about controlling what he can.

In Kyousei, Taichi decides to kill Meicoomon once Meiko breaks down and says that's what she wants (which is another thing altogether). But at that time his resolve is shaky. Instead, he winds up sacrificing himself to protect Yamato and Meiko. Taichi's still our typical idea of a shonen hero at the end of Kyousei.

Bokura no Mirai picks up by handing Taichi what is essentially a riff on the trolley problem. And he wants the third choice: the way that saves everyone. But what Nishijima wants him to realize, I think, is that clinging to the hope that that third choice exists even without evidence is not the way that does no harm. That idealism comes with its own collateral damage. By running from the dilemma, he's saying he's willing to risk all of their lives on a fantasy. Then Nishijima forces the matter and makes the choice himself, and that forces Taichi to reevaluate his own views of life and death. It's no longer "all life is precious no matter what." Life and death are always connected and neither good nor evil.

Taichi returns to the others no longer unsure about what to do. He's accepted that continuing to try to save Meicoomon, at this point, is to treat other people's lives as less important. If, at that point, Koushirou or someone had said "I have an idea to save her," I think Taichi would have done it. But their hope for a miracle has so far only prolonged everyone's suffering - Meicoomon's, Meiko's, the world's. It's because no one has any more ideas and they are out of time that he chooses her death.

Because Meiko/Meicoomon were created just for Tri, and don't have the same status as the classic characters, it's... maybe not fair to call it a cop-out, but even in the framework of complex morality, the writers definitely didn't want to go as far as killing any fan favorites. So that's a degrees of separation thing. And I think Hikari's actions are meant to answer for that. She cares deeply about everyone. She values life indiscriminately, so her ideals don't allow her to arrive at the same conclusion as her brother.

But that doesn't make her naive. The fact that idealism can be harmful doesn't mean it's bad or childish. When Taichi tells her, "You stay that way," I don't think he's just being a doting older brother who doesn't want his baby sister to face the dark world. Hikari's faced plenty of darkness. I think we've always been shown that Taichi respects Hikari very much and I don't think he'd do her the disservice of treating her convictions as childish and his own epiphany as the one true path to adulthood. Instead, he wants her to continue to hold onto her ideals, because he knows it's only by continuing to value those ideals that they'll ever see the kind of future they wish for, and because he knows only someone like her can keep him in check.

Tri also gives a big cryptic spiel about how “the sensitive things are the most fragile” or something like that. And we see Hikari’s fragility when losing her brother causing her to wig out and somehow help cause Ordinemon. But the other thing we see with Hikari is her standing up to Homeostasis, trying to wrestle control back to herself. And it's the Ordinemon fusion that enables Tailmon to support Meicoomon. So even if we say her sensitivity makes her fragile, "fragility" can't be equated with "weakness." There are many fragile things in the world that have a hidden resilience and play an important role in the ecosystem. Hikari’s like that. That’s why her “idealistic” view isn’t silly or naive. It’s an essential part of being human - same as Taichi’s. It’s definitely on purpose that Hikari is the representative of “Light” which very obviously means “life” in Digimon, and Taichi’s huge play in Tri is about, as well as resulting from, death. They're put in contrast to each other.

That's what I think Hikari can't forgive: her brother is basically saying, "You choose your path, and I choose mine." If she had then stormed off and refused to fight, it would be one thing, but she doesn't - she stays and does her part. It's only natural that she'd feel disturbed with what they're doing. She doesn't look away though. She accepts her brother's worldview without sacrificing her own. I thought things would have to be rocky between them for a while afterward because they'd need time to realign, learn how to work together with different value sets. How to make those values support and balance each other rather than tear each other down.

It's not clear at the end of Bokura no Mirai that Taichi's made the right decision. I think that's the point - sometimes you just can't know, but you still have to decide. I'm sure the writers knew fans would be wont to side with their heroes, but that could be deceptive. Maybe that's why Hikari get so much attention in that last scene: the writers are telling us "You don't have to agree with this choice. But time moves forward with or without us."

Those are my thoughts for the moment at least... I guess it could just be “Taichi’s an adult now and helping the others step out of their childhood dreamworld” but I guess I just internally reject that. So maybe I’m wrong but... well, I prefer to think about it this way :P It was a hell of a thing to walk out of the theater like “did that really happen?” Tri just ripped off the idea of “escapist anime movie” and just took itself really seriously and that’s why I looooooove it. Like, I’m so glad we didn’t get a triumphant, feel-good ending. Wouldn’t have minded clearer answers to certain questions *cough* but Tri is definitely unforgettable.

#hikari yagami #taichi yagami #digimon adventure tri #digimon #sorry i cant be short ever #but it was useful for me to write it out too tho im worried i missed something #its hard to separate impressions from reality sometimes so i could be overlooking something that would change my mind #ask

[purplesurveys]

497

Have you ever cut your own hair? Nope, my mom would never allow me; and tbh I never would allow myself to do it either. What do you eat most frequently? Rice. I have it for every meal, 7 days a week. Except for when I have pasta. Are you a fan of video games? I’m a fan of watching people play them, and there are a lot of video games I have sentimental attachment to because I was raised in a home where all the boys knew how to work a console; but I myself don’t play. What's your favorite color combination? Black/white with anything earthy. I’m all for simple tones. Did you share a locker at school? No, we all had our own.

What's one sport you could never play? Basketball. I never could understand what the rules were. When we had basketball for PE in high school, I would literally just stand on the court when it came time to play because I never had a grasp on the game. I was a sucky teammate fosho. Blue or black ink? Black. I hate using pens with blue ink. Have you ever sang karaoke? I think the last time was when I was 12 or 13. I hate hate hate being the center of attention and the last thing I want is to sing (which I don’t do) on a microphone that’s gonna amplify my voice and will force people to look at me. What was the last concert you attended? Man it was nearly a year ago, but it was Paramore. Have you held anyone's hand in the past week? Yup, you just barely caught the timeframe! I last held hands last Thursday, exactly a week from today. What's your favorite perfume/body spray/cologne? I bought Beyoncé’s Heat Rush a few years back because I was a huge fan (still am), but I didn’t know I was gonna end up loving the scent so much. It’s still my perfume today and it’s my go-to when I’m going on a date or going somewhere fancy and/or formal. How long does it take you to get ready in the morning? 45 minutes should be generous enough. I have to beat the traffic everyday so I don’t devote a lot of time simply to get ready. What is the oldest age you think should wear makeup? No age is too old for makeup. How old were you when you went on your first date? I’ve never had a first date per se...I did have one special museum + early dinner ‘date’ with Gab that ended up becoming memorable. I was 16 then. What's your nationality(ies)? Filipino. Pretty sure there’s some distant, distant Spanish blood somewhere down the line. Are you an open book? Very open.  Do you think you're a good secret keeper? For the most part, yeah; but there’ll be times that I wouldn’t be able to help it and spill to Gabie. Which is fine, because she forgets things easily and is 101% not up to date with and doesn’t care for anyone’s lives. She’s super unbothered which is why I kinda choose to tell her stories; but if she had a big mouth, then I probably won’t spill secrets to her. Name one fashion trend you could never follow. Oversized shirts. Do you prefer long hair or short hair? Right now, I’m preferring short. When do you plan to go to sleep tonight? Just my bed. Has anyone besides your family seen you naked? Yes. If so, who? My girlfriend. What exotic animal would you love to have as a pet? NOPE. Do you want kids when you're older? Yeah, I do. Did your parents sign you up for anything you hated as a child? They made me sing to 100+ guests on my 7th birthday party if that counts. I had ballet when I was 5, but it wasn’t that I hated it...it’s just that I was too young to understand what was happening and what I was signed up to, which was partly why I did so badly in the class. Where's your cell phone? I lost my first cellphone on a 1st grade field trip, so it’s definitely somewhere in the waterfalls we went to 14 years ago. Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Egg. What are your feelings about Octomom? I don’t really know the circumstances surrounding her, so. Do you know of Smosh? Of course, I grew up watching them. I was there when their popularity exploded, and a little longer after that. I don’t anymore, but sometimes I’ll go back and watch their 2011-2013 skits, and my personal favorite series of theirs, Lunchtime with Smosh.  Do you drink enough water daily? Yep. I looooooove water; I probably drink too much of it haha. Is your diet healthy? I think it *could* fall under healthy? I eat too much junk for my life but I always balance it out with veggies and I just basically make sure that everything else I eat can be beneficial for me, so it balances all the junk out. What's your favorite fruit? Yeah no I hate fruit. What was your favorite Halloween costume? The year when I dressed up as AJ, because I got noticed by her for it. Also the time I dressed up as Sofie, because that was lowkey hilarious. Have you purchased any cool objects from a foreign country? No because everything in other countries (at least the ones I’ve been to) is SO EXPENSIVE. I prefer taking photos, they serve as the best souvenirs for me. Are you on a laptop or a desktop computer right now? Laptop. Where do you plan to post this survey? On my Tumblr, which you’re on right now if you’ve reached this point of the survey. Do you remember anyone's number by heart? Just my mom’s, sister’s, and Gabie’s. Are you a morning person or a late night owl? Night owl, definitely. Name something you will never try in your lifetime. Fruits that I haven’t already tried. What do you think is your biggest flaw? I chicken out of certain things because I’m afraid of failing. First physical trait you notice in the sex you're attracted to? Body language. That technically counts right? Hahaha. How about personality wise? How they speak to me. Are you sick often? I’m sick never. Would you rather have strep throat or an ear infection? I’ve had neither and would like it to stay that way thank you??? When did you last shower? A couple of hours ago, because it was weirdly and annoyingly hot today. Do you have neat handwriting? Yes, I get a lot of compliments for my penmanship. Are you a messy or organized person? Depends on what the space is. My bag for school can get very messy, but my files are always organized; and my room is what I’d call messy-organized in that it’s a mess but I remember where every single thing is. At what age do you hope to get married? 27-28. Is being thin really all that great? I don’t hate being it, that’s for sure. Which of the seven deadly sins do you think you're most guilty of? Envy. How much time have you spent on the computer today? Pretty much the whole day. My body wanted to watch a whole season of Queer Eye today haha.

What size shoe are you? 6-7. How was the weather today? Ugh, MAKE IT RAIN ALREADY. Do you live above, below, or on the Equator? Above the equator, but it’s very very close to it. Do you know how to use Photoshop? Nope. Admit it, you're thinking about someone right now. I’m thinking about the next meal I’m gonna be having lmfao. Where is he/she? It’s in the dining area. Where was your first job? I haven’t had one yet. Favorite year in high school? 3rd or 4th. East or West? East? Where did your first kiss take place? On my bed. What color do you wear most often? I can’t tell which but it’s definitely black or white.

Who was the last person you talked on the phone to? Gab. Have you ever been to a night club? Nah, I don’t know if clubs are my thing. I’m much more comfortable in bars. Are you allergic to anything? I’m not. What's the best place you have ever eaten? The buffet at Circles, Sambokojin, or the food I had at my cruise ship vacation. I really can’t pick. Do you own a hair straightener? I don’t have one of my own, but my mom will let me borrow hers if I need it. Are you barefoot right now? Correcto. Are you subscribed to any magazine? Nope. Puppies or kittens? Puppies. If you had a billion dollars, where would your first investment be made? A modern, spacious house. Who is the best artist you've seen live? PARAMORE YOOOOOOOOOOOO. They connect with their fans so well and you can easily tell you love what they do. Coldplay is a very close second as their production value is fucking insane. Any major plans coming up this week? No not really. I have a date with Gab tomorrow and we’re gonna go out and watch Midsommar, but that’s it for this week. She, Angela, and I are taking a road trip to Nasugbu next Monday though so that’s pretty major. Did you know they never told you Arnold's last name in Hey, Arnold? I never really thought about it. Would you rather watch a romantic comedy or watch a thrilling horror movie? OMG, my two favorite genres :( I’m watching a horror flick tomorrow so I can go for a romcom right now.   Why is Paris Hilton famous? Because of her great-grandfather and her Iconic show with Nicole Richie hahaha. How is your hair styled right now? It’s just down and dried out right now.

Favorite person that you've talked to today? Angela. Do you need AC right now? AC is always a good idea in the Philippines. Do more people call you by a nickname or your first name? My first name is already my nickname/given name. Name something you're proud of. Still being here. How do you feel about couples who say 'I love you' too soon? No judgment. If that’s how they communicate and if it works, so be it. What's the most recent favor you've done for somebody? I drove Laurice to UPTC last Tuesday so she can catch her bus going back all the way to Alabang. Are you at home right now? Yesssssssss I’m so happy to just be at home this whole week. What did you last spend money on? My parking fee at UPTC. Does any accent annoy you? No. How about turn you on? I like certain English accents but not to the point where they turn me on haha. Are you wearing any jewelry? Not right now. Do you get along better with your mom or your dad? Dad. Are you craving anything right now? BURGERS What's worse: Crocs or Uggs? Crocs. Do you knock before you open doors? Yeah, as much as I can. Do you know what a sock on the doorknob means? I think Penny from Big Bang Theory was the one who explained that this means that there are people having sex in the room, but then again it was a tie on the doorkob in that episode so I dunno if they still mean two different things. Chocolate or vanilla? Chocolate. What's your zodiac sign? Taurus. Does Fred from Youtube annoy you? No, not really.

#survey #surveys