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orkbutch · 2 months

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So, I'm not really in the weeds of Transgender Discourse on the internet (I have a life and also care about my mental health) but I've seen something discussed here about trans masculinity and I wanna talk about it.

I'm very masculine. I'm butch, I'm trans masc, I've always wanted to be masculine and I feel most comfortable when I'm presenting as such. Without much effort or any intention on my part I am read as a cis man day to day. Because I don't present more fem, in queer spaces I am read and recieved as a man, maybe trans, probably into other men. People do not even consider if I'm a butch lesbian unless there's Significant context indicating it. Because of this I'm viewed through 'Man Lens'; It feels a different if I say 'bitch', if I talk about my attraction to women. I don't get smiled at, people put physical distance between me and them as much as possible.

This is familiar for a lot of trans masculine people and trans men that aren't androgynous/fem leaning in their style, and it is an upsetting change to happen. It makes us feel judged or misunderstood to suddenly be causing this wariness in others; it feels prejudiced. I've seen people putting words to this like transmisandry. This is something they want to lessen in their communities, so they don't have to experience this anymore.

Now, here's my opinion part: That's not going to happen. You cannot tackle the "problem" of people responding to your masculinity with wariness. They aren't controlling the wariness, they can't. More importantly, their wariness toward masculinity and what registers in their brain as "man-like" is well founded. It's based in lifetimes of experiences and trauma that has told them men can be very unsafe to be around, and that is true. Most men are cis, and cis men are the most threatening thing in this world to non-cis men. They are usually* socially privileged above others, more likely to inflict violence, more likely to abuse and murder others, are typically physically more powerful than others. Everyone thats not a cis man DEEPLY internalises a very rational wariness of men, and masculine presentation as an extension. Especially men that are strangers. (*This is of course different when we consider intersections of race, colonialism, classism, ect. But globally this generalisation is still pretty accurate.)

Honestly, I don't think this wariness towards masculine presentation is something thats useful or realistic to challenge. Like many internalised processes it's probably a good idea to examine it and consider its usefulness, but I think it'd be easy to conclude that it is a useful wariness for people to have. Women have lots of reasons to be wary around men, including the unique threats of transmisogyny. Queer and gender deviant men have lots of reasons to be wary around men. This is The Reality of patriarchy.

Personally, the place I've come to with how women and queer people react to my masculinity (which is not entirely negative btw, the wariness is just one aspect) is that... I understand their wariness. I have it too, toward those my brain assumes are cis men. I cannot control how they feel or what they think about me. I can only be respectful to others and to myself and live my life. I flag my butchness where I can, I make my gender clear to those it matters to, and the rest I accept as largely beyond my influence. All of us have to do this in some places in our lives.

Even though my masculinity makes other queers wary, I have lots of friends! I've had no real trouble dating or finding intimacy. Initial wariness is just that. Once you understand each other, break the barrier, its usually settled. For anyone who finds my masculinity so offputting that we can't break the barrier, I'm glad neither of us put each other through that discomfort. I understand where a fear like that comes from. I will still hold community with them because that's what solidarity entails.

Anyway thats my ramble about masculinity in queer community, good bye until another. who knows how long

#back on the tumblr diary #personal #edited the section about women having reasons to fear men and transmisogyny; poorly phrased lol.

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realrosielol · 1 month

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Maomao returning home after her and Jinshi's street date in EP17

#artists on tumblr #illustration #fanart #the apothecary diaries #kusuriya no hitorigoto #maomao #luomen #based on that one scene in Frieren EP23 #im sure she stopped by the verdigris house to change into her usual attire before going back to luomen #but hey its the thought that counts right

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annanicolesmxth · 2 months

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br1tt1an1 · 3 months

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2014-2016 grunge

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lonelyohsolonelyghostgirl · 20 days

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𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦 𝐢𝐬𝐧'𝐭 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭, 𝐰𝐞'𝐫𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐢𝐝𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐬

𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐈'𝐯𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐞𝐥�� 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐞, 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐬𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐲 𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐥𝐝...

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fbfh · 1 year

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omg i love painting my nails but i always end up chiping them because of ✨️ anxiety ✨️

RODRICK THINKS THAT'S THE CUTEST FUCKING THING EVER. There's tons of girls at your school with perfect manicures, but he likes the way yours chip as you use your hands, as you play his drums and help him study and pick at them. It looks more organic. It's like a comfy worn in pair of jeans, and he thinks it makes your hands look so pretty. plus it's an easy way for him to moniter how bad your anxiety has been recently. If you call him instead of texting because your nails are drying and by the end of the next day they're almost bare again, he knows to stay extra close to you. He knows to send you playlists and extra I love you texts throughout the day. He drives a little slower when you go places in his van and parks a little more carefully, and if you even look like you might want to talk, he's already so down. He'll blast your favorite album in an empty parking lot so you know no one can possibly overhear you, and lets you spill your guts. He'll hug you if you want, or kiss you, or just be a shoulder to cry on (literally and figuratively) and if you have any breathing exercises or coping strategies, he knows them like the back of his hand. He's always down to repeat affirmations to you and hype you up and ask what would Billie Joe Armstrong or Gerard Way do. He kisses the back of your hand while you drive and lets you pick the music and keeps the seat pushed all the way up for you, he'll stay up late texting you, even wake up from a dead sleep bc he has your ringtone and text tone set to the loudest one, just in case you need him. He knows people think he's a loser or a screw up, but the two things he's never going to half ass are music and being there for you. in spite of what people might think, he's a really good fucking boyfriend.

#tumblr user lee says things #rodrick heffley #rodrick heffley x reader #rodrick heffley drabbles #rodrick #rodrick x reader #rodrick drabbles #diary of a wimpy kid x reader #diary of a wimpy kid #diary of a wimpy kid drabbles #also my spelling is way worse than usual bc i havent been as productive writing this week (which is fine) but as a consequence #I haven't had as much practice typing and reading and spelling so now my dyslexia is showing lmfao #/lh #i'll be back to rights soon yk #but if there's more typos than usual it's not my fault /hj

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alisaasblog · 9 months

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gossip girl x tvd 🙊🙊🛍️💸🤑🧛‍♀️

#2014 tumblr #bring back 2014 #2014 aesthetic #2014 #spotify #i miss 2014 #ian somerhalder #paul wesley #nina dobrev #leighton meester #chuck bass #ed westwick #nate archibald #blair waldorf #elena gilbert #damon salvatore #stefan salvatore #gossip girl #the vampire diaries

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midnightclover · 3 months

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Summon Night: Swordcraft Story (ATLUS, 2003)

#my actual posts lol #haha what if i made a daily diary post thing like nico #..i was just thinking #today was a good day #and i thought of this song #ive been playing summon night swordcraft story a lot as of late.. though none today actually #its still on my mind though #i considered using dweller empty path's song flying through a stary sky instead.. but this is what i thought of first #i think it fits best to use it #i actually had to jump through some hoops to upload music!#cus my tumblr app is kinda old.. i cant properly upload music. i could only put a link #which isnt exactly ideal #so i tried in my web browser.. but maybe its cus i havent updated it in a while or maybe just cus its tor.. it didnt work #so i downloaded firefox and did it on there lol #now im editing it in my drafts back on the app #dont ask why im not just doing it on my computer... shes having some technical difficulties. we're working on it #but not today #...#today was pretty eventful.. even if not very productive. but ive never been a very productive person #we went and saw some light festival thing! it was rly nice.. a little simple at times but it was fun #we went and got some yummy snacks earlier too! tho ive already eaten them all hehe #and i started up animal crossing new leaf. i hadnt played it in ages! its startling how much better it is than new horizions.. imo at least #only problem is i couldnt make it the same as my island.. and i didnt remember why i named my last town #we searched for a while for some reference or somfin to name it after.. but we ended up just going with ''faraway''#cus i liked the idea of being asked where im going.. and just saying far far away #and as beth said it has a kinda fairytail vibe!#...only after i named it did i realize i accidentally named it after the town in omori. oops!#...im about to hit the tag limit. so whoevers still listening i just want u to know..#i love you. ok?#goodnight

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labotor · 1 year

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recent + old scarecrow art dump 🎃

#jonathan crane #the scarecrow #btas #dc #my art #when I say old I mean... 4 years ago lmao #idk if its a bad thing or not I think its still up to my standards 💀#tho TBF the recent one was a quickie to stop my drawing skills from degrading completely lol #I cant understate how obsessed I am with this weirdo #it comes in waves over years but listening to the batman audio adventures has got me right back into his clutches #the MC's dad from b99 voices him and his performance is soooo MMMM #mad scientist + halloween-adjacent design combo just has me in a chokehold #the new batman adventures design is so gawddamn good and underused but it is a pain in the bum to draw #once again sorry for treating my tumblr tags as a personal diary

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dangthatscrayz · 2 months

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You have no idea how close I am to start writing cringey slay the princess x reader fanfiction and headcannons, autism is winning yall.

This how I feel rn:

That was a joke for obvious reasons

But this fandom needs the 2016 fandom treatment I want to see a ungodly amount of fan au’s and crappy fanfiction everyone reads anyways

(Thank you for coming to me TEDtalk)

(If anyone causally slips stuff into my inbox i might have to do it, I’m sorry but the amount of fanfiction on this app is so criminally low I feel like by law I have to do it)((don’t ask how I am doing rn I swear I’m very normal abt slay the princess)

#no I’m not doing ok #slay the princess is in my blood #I’ve gone too deep #when you stare into stp #stp stares back #i’m sorry #treating tumblr like a diary #is fun #stp #slay the princess

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sophiesonlinediary · 2 months

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going on break until may !!!

you can all still bug me and my inbox and such but i will be gone. i do promise to check up on this account at least twice until i come back full time

intro post

tagging my mutuals: @nqds, @deprivedofbraincellsandsleep, @reminiscentreader, @skeelly, @mqstermindswift, @jewelledmoths, @lyrakanefanatic, @urbanflorals, @lost-in-reveriie, @a-beautiful-fool, @faultsline, @imthatweirdratinthecorner, @cyberccx, @lumine4624, @lovelikethemovies13, @sheneverstopsreading, @the0nlyallison, @swiftreader1989, @alltheliars, @reyna-obsessed, @shefollowedthestars, @percabeths-blue-cookies, @bookishswiftie1989, @styie, @dorothheaa, @baboland, @crrneliastreet, @that-multi-fandom-hijabi, @venux777, @lanitahoney, @urapocolypticcrush, @solutopia, @suki1vr, @ivyppoison, @stvrlighttgabss, @allthetorturedpoets, @swiftieannah, @foaming-sea, @halucynator, @banilikesfictionalpeople, @leaskisses444, @catastrxblues, @formulalina15, @never-enough-novels, @buticanfixhernoreallyican, @raingalaxy

#sophie's diary entry #guys i’ve decided to go on break for a while to focus on my studies i may be coming on this app if something happens in any fandom im in bu #ill be back i swear #i just really need to focus on my studies and tumblr is my greatest distraction

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skateskunk · 5 months

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Glow up or glow down, be honest

#tbh his limited polygons are part of his charm #anyways #art account #artists on tumblr #art #artwork #side blog #blorbo #laurence mcd #minecraft #minecraft diaries #aphmau #old hyperfixation #back on my bullshit #pheonix drop guards #gaarance

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merantidote-deact · 5 months

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rest, at last

#artists on tumblr #my art #artwork #oc #eirin #ouugh my poor baby #mcd oc #ill talk more about her soon #yes she has the same marking as irene on menphia #on her back tho #minecraft diaries #minecraft diaries oc #mcd fanart #minecraft diaries fanart

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2nebula · 8 months

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ok. so. Murderbot can't eat, right? Well established, it's digestive system is different, nothing would happen except there would be food matter somewhere there shouldn't be. But! But but but, Muderbot can smell. The growth medium thing (and other instances) proves that. Which means Murderbot can probably taste things (in the air, specifically).

I don't think it will, however. And I think it's because Murderbot seems to view all of it's senses as tools for security, and security only. So where am I going with this?

I'd love for Murderbot so slowly start treating parts of itself less like tools and more like what makes it who it is. I feel like as much as Murderbot knows it's a person, it also treats itself so much less like a person. It always insists thing's are different for SecUnits and Bots, and that it and humans are almost incomparable in how they think, act, feel, etc. (Internalized anti–androidism or androidphobia if you will). And for Murderbot to acknowledge it's senses as more than just tools for the job, to experience it's world in a variety of ways just for the sake of it, for the sake of seeing new things and finding joy in them, would be one step closer to Murderbot acknowledging that you don't have to be human to be a person, and that's exactly what it is.

#if someone made a fic about this i would threaten to bomb a colony for them #this has been rattling in my head for MONTHS #i literally reinstalled the tumblr app just so i can finally post this and dip until the Thoughts come creeping back (or i miss tumblr ppl)#murderbot #murderbot diaries #the murderbot diaries #secunit #i finally did it i made a murderbot post instead of just quietly losing my mind over it

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br1tt1an1 · 2 months

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cheetah print 🐆💗

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lonelyohsolonelyghostgirl · 24 days

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Being me can only mean feeling scared to breathe and if you leave me, then I'll be afraid of everything

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